#he said all that stuff about how I saw the real him and valued him for who he is

[tenitchyfingers]

Literally almost cried watching Astarion break the cycle of abuse and be free

[latristereina]

“Her mouth was sweet and he gently pulled her down on the bed. She closed her eyes, waiting for him to make love to her and Michael felt an enormous happiness. He had spent the war years fighting in the Pacific, and on those bloody islands he had dreamed of a girl like Kay Adams. Of a beauty like hers. A fair and fragile body, milky-skinned and electrified by passion.”

“He was surprised to find himself so secretive with Kay. He loved her, he trusted her, but he would never tell her anything about his father or the Family. She was an outsider.”

“Michael often thought of Kay, of her smile, her body, and always felt a twinge of conscience at leaving her so brutally without a word of farewell.”

“…it was nothing like the love he’d had for Kay, a love based as much on her sweetness, her intelligence and the polarity of the fair and dark.”

“Kay was silent for a long time. ‘Why do you want me to marry you after never calling me all these months? Am I so good in bed?’ Michael nodded gravely. ‘Sure,’ he said. ‘But I’m getting it for nothing so why should I marry you for that?’”

‘You are the only person I felt any affection for, that I care about.’

“But Kay was grateful. She knew that Michael had done it against all his own inclinations. Had done it because she had asked him to, and that she was the only person in the world who could make him act against his own nature.”

“Kay put her hand on Hagen’s arm. ‘He didn’t order you to tell me all the other things?’ Hagen hesitated a moment as if debating whether to tell her a final truth. ‘You still don’t understand,’ he said. ‘If you told Michael what I’ve told you today, I’m a dead man.’ He paused again. ‘You and the children are the only people on this earth he couldn’t harm.’”

- Mario Puzo, “The Godfather”

“Michael loved her when he met her and he loved her throughout his life and he loves her to this day, even though their relationship was surrounded by a lie. He not only loves her, he admires her.”

- Al Pacino, (x)

“And consequently, as we see him even in his commendatory finery receiving the highest award the Vatican can bestow he…his face is a mirror of his soul that’s ravaged and sickly and very very heartbroken because what he values the most is the thing that he has lost… but he has his children, and his children at this point, I would think to Michael mean everything, his daughter and his son.”

“Although to me, what is about to happen here is the beginning of rebuilding of what really means most to him…I have no doubt that Michael despite the limitations of his Sicilian-American upbringing and how men were supposed to be, how women were supposed to be and wives were supposed to be, he really loved Kay, much as Diane and Al really love each other or loved each other or probably will always love each other… I felt we were dealing with real things in the context of this romantic novel.”

- Francis Ford Coppola’s DVD commentary, (x)

“He would do it for his children, this boy and this girl that was all he had left of his marriage with Kay, which obviously meant a lot to him but which she basically pulled the plug on. She was not going to be married to a man who murdered people and stuff.”

“I saw what Michael had, and thereby understood what he had lost. He loved Kay, you know. Kay represented to him this dream that one day he would be out of it. He would have achieved the goal, which was to one day be totally legitimate. He had promised her that he would do that and somehow he was not quite able to just pull it off.”

- Francis Ford Coppola, (x)

@godfat-her

[matan4il]

911 ep 707 first watch reactions

Oh man, I'm actually not sure I have that much to say about this ep.

The entire plot with Mara and her brother Tyson was very sweet, very nice, and way too convenient. One day, shows are going to stop using the phrase, "There must be something you can do!" like it's some secret magic phrase, that makes this sentiment into a reality, AND turns the person addressed into someone willing to risk everything, in order to do that one thing they can do, which is usually something they're very much not supposed to... That said, Denny was sweet, Mara was lovely, her with Tyson was very endearing, and Henren continued to rule.

The storyline with Maddie was nicely handled, both her trauma, and the way Chim helped her use it to figure out the case and help save everyone from the stalker. My little Madney heart absolutely loved it. And Maddie's distress over a baby involved felt very real and understandable, when she's a mom herself now.

But then in a sense, it was clear this has no long term repercussions, other than bringing Brad into contact with Bobby. With his burn scars, and what we know about the fire that Bobby caused in the past, we can guess where this is headed. I trust that 911 will delve into this coming clash with the same humaneness with which it tackles most storylines.

But I'll be honest, I don't really like where Eddie's headed. I know Shannon scarred him deeply, but he was able to let go of her, and allow her to walk away from him twice while she was alive. It's weird if it's now being implied that the reason why he was never able to move on to another serious r/s is that he was stuck on her. The way she died was traumatic and painful, and it made sense that, even accepting that they as a couple were over, he had a hard time dealing with her death, but Eddie seemingly moved on in s4 at the latest. It feels a bit like they don't really know what to do with him, and how to move him on, so they keep going in circles with his character. Kinda like they were with Buck in s6. None of what we saw in that season helped Buck get to some major breakthroughs that we've seen in this one, so this current storyline with Eddie might end in the same way.

I'm not saying it doesn't have the potential to move him forward, and I'm sure it will be presented as if it has whether it actually does or doesn't (kinda like how 618 presented Buck and Natalia as a move forward, even though it very obviously was not), but right now, I'm not enjoying it. I also... even with this idea of having Eddie run into a Shannon look-a-like, I feel they could have gone in a lot of different ways, and the one where he goes on a date with her while having a serious gf he's essentially cheating on, it just doesn't feel great, or true to Eddie's values. Which can be the point, right? That sometimes we're so shaken up, we do stuff that's uncharacteristic. If that's where they'll take it, then it's working, 'coz right now, everything about this feels a little off. Let's hope they do something actually constructive with this, and give Eddie real progress (rather than just give Tim an opportunity to re-use an actress he already said he really likes).

Small mandatory Buddifer moment was really lovely, even if far from what my shipper heart would want. Then again, I honestly feel it's so funny that Buck is dating Tommy, while being married to Eddie, his actual baby daddy. If there aren't a lot of fics shipping all three men already, then IDK fandom.

Thank you for reading! If you’re looking for more, you can find my s7 reactions tag here, and more of my Buddie meta and content in my pinned post. xoxox

[sc0tters]

The Last Hello | Mat Barzal

summary: it’s been two months since you last saw Mat. but what happens when you are both in important roles in the event and Mat had been doing som personal evaluating.

request: yes/no

warnings: sad Mat, no real ending, slight use of strong language

word count:3.1k

authors note/ ending went to crap as I am tried so pls excuse any typos cause this wasn’t beta read. This is sort of a part two for The Last Goodbye, but I won’t make a series as this is the last part. both parts came be read separately but they make more sense in the way suggested (pt 1 then pt2). To the person who wanted Wedding Mat I didn’t know if you had a preference for whether or not he was the groom. So if I’ve gotten it majorly wrong just let me know and I’ll write you a new piece!

pt 1

You wondered if you would have been seen as a bitch if you didn’t show up.

Sure you were the maid of honour, and sure you had said you could survive seeing Mat for a whole week again but that didn’t mean that you thought you could actually do it.

You hadn’t seen Mat in over two months after timing the pick-up of your stuff in his apartment whilst he was in New Jersey you were physically officially gone. It was the worst reality check that Mat could have ever come home to, the first sign was when your hat wasn’t on its hook by the door anymore and it only went down hill from there. The Canadian had contemplated all of the different ways to talk to you, he had called all of your friends and the ones who did pick up said you needed space. He even sat at your favourite coffee shop every morning for a week until one of the baristas who had seen the two of you in there plenty of times eventually told him that you started getting your coffees delivered to work and that’s why you hadn’t been in there.

It had been the hardest two and a half months of your life. When the islanders were knocked out of the cup you wanted to call him, when you saw a cat that reminded you of Marley. The ginger cat you snuck into your dorm and then had to give to Mat when your RA found out about him. That led to three happy years where you were proud cat parents before Marley got sick causing you two to have to put him to sleep, leading to a week of near none stop tears from you both. When you saw a couple at your favourite table at the local Korean BBQ place you wanted to tell him as it was an ongoing joke between the two of you. But your brain always told your heart to forget about it as there was no chance you were going to do that to yourself. Sure you regretted breaking up with him after you had some time to think about it, but you really never thought that he’d ever take you back. And besides with how things ended you knew that you missed the old Mat, not the current one who value love in the way that you did. Staying in New York was tough on your heart so you opted to moving further into the city where you were now in Rangers territory. Your one bedroom apartment was above this nice old lady who had three cats who all seemed to adore you. Felix the grey tabby cat made daily trips up the stairs to come say hello to you where he got his daily dose of cuddles from you. The best part about Margret though was that she knew nothing about hockey so you turned into an open good about your breakup with Mat.

It was refreshing being able to just vent to a totally outside party about it all “know you remember that if he gives you any shit you punch him okay,” Margaret’s words drew a laugh from your lips.

You loved how blunt she was “and then I’ll give him a second one and say it’s from you,” you nodded as you pulled her into a hug “thank you,” not only had she taken you to the airport but she had also convinced you to go to the wedding. Her words called you out for being a bad friend at the fact that you even considered not going just because of a boy. Whilst Mat was a little bit more than just some boy to you, you understood what she meant and were quick to book your flight to Kelowna just after that.

Sure you were disappointed that you weren’t going to make it to the bridal shower but you were swamped at work and Lenasia was just grateful that you could come to the wedding.

You and Mat had been asked to be the maid of honour and best man respectively as your friendship with the couple had gone on for years. It came as a shock when you announce that you and Mat had broken up but when both she and Ethan had confirmed with both of you that you were comfortable being around the other during the big day, wedding plans were quick to continue on.

After the long flight you thanked your taxi driver as you got out of the car “just when I thought you wouldn’t show up.” Ethan joked as he had seen your taxi pull into the street a minute ago from the kitchen window.

You let out a playful scoff “miss my Gracie Bear too much for that.” You pretty much stepped into the role of playful aunt whenever you saw his daughter. It was aided by the fact that she seemed to adore you “she’s just woken up from a nap,” he explained as he pulled you into a hug.

It felt weird for him as he had never heard your side of the break up from you. Sure Lenasia had relaid information onto him after you called her in tears one night, so he knew that you were just as broken as Mat was but it was tough not being able to say anything to either one of you about the other. The soon to be married couple wanted to meddle but they knew that it was best if they kept their noses out of it all “you better not be hiding my maid of honour E!” Lenasia called out causing you to giggle “where’s my beautiful bride?” You asked as you made your way into the cabin.

Your relationship with the girl has blossomed over the fact that your boyfriends played on the same team, when they went separate ways you still remained in touch never letting your friendship burn out.

Mat thought he was dreaming when he saw you walk in, the way you hugged Lenasia placing a kiss on her cheek before you picked up Gracie and proceeded to smother her in kisses eliciting a high pitched giggle from the baby. You looked good, there was no doubt about it. You had cut your hair and had even gotten those highlights that you had been contemplating on for like four years.

When the Canadian locked eyes with you everyone seemed to notice it. Even Gracie did as she made a little noise of complaint that she wasn’t your center of attention. Not wanting to be weird you let your face form a soft smile “why don’t I show you to your room,” Lenasia offered as she motioned to you to follow her.

Ethan watched as the three of you left as you still had Gracie in your arms “you okay bro?” He asked as he tapped Mats arm. That was the weirdest thing he had like ever seen the boy so “yeah,” the Islanders player nodded as he thought he was going to throw up. The idea of seeing you again was something that he once looked forward to, still desperate to get back with you Mat hadn’t accepted the fact that you two had broken up. Actually seeing you felt like a whole different territory.

A wave of nerves came over you as you guys walked past more bedrooms “since my cousin decided to come you have two options, there is a bed in Gracie’s room or-” Lenasia sent you an apologetic look as she felt bad for the situation you had been put into “it looks like we’re roomies.” You had cut her off because you knew the second option involved Mat, she hadn’t given any signs to indicate that matter but somehow in your heart you knew that he was apart of the unsaid statement.

You looked down to the clothes you were wearing and realised that you were in need of a change “I’ll let you take her whilst I go freshen up?” You asked as you held Gracie out for her mother to grab.

The first real moment of silence you got came and hit you like a truck. With the amount of unknown girls that were there you were glad that none of them were Mats date. Sure it didn’t mean that he was single, but it meant you didn’t have to watch him get all cozy with another girl.

Your body practically collapsed onto the bed as you were in need of a nap. The eight hour plane ride was finally catching up to you. But just as you were about to doze off into a peaceful slumber you heard that ever so familiar laugh “you look like you’ve just died,” Mat pointed out as he leaned against the frame of your door.

You rolled onto your side to look at him “been a long day,” you confessed as you had been up since five in the morning due to nerves.

What surprised you the most was the way Mat walked into the room and sat in the little arm chair that faced your bed. He wanted to talk but the words were not things that he could find “how were the parties?” You asked as you propped your head up by your hands.

It actually hurt Mat that you hadn’t asked him about himself and he meant that in the least conceited way possible. Maybe it was the fault of his brain or his heart but he truly thought that you could have at least asked how he was “they both went down successfully.” He nodded as he rubbed his chin feeling the stubble that was being to grow through.

You always loved it when Mat had a beard, it was a tradition at one point that if the Islanders made it into the playoffs that he’d let his beard grow for the duration of the teams time in the playoffs.

It might have sounded absurd but the action from the boy made your thighs clench “thanks for picking up my slack when I was gone.” You yawned as you smiled at him.

The Canadian watched as you rested your head on the soft padding that was your duvet “I’ll let you get some sleep,” his voice was soft as he pulled your blanket over you.

The way you mumbled a small thank you before you shut your eyes warmed Mats heart “I love you,” he whispered making sure that you were all tucked in before he left you.

So what he didn’t hear was how you said the same words back just as he walked out of your bedroom letting your sleep consume you.

Your love for Gracie was seriously being question by the way she continued to babble whilst the two of you were meant to be asleep “Gracie Bear please so me a real one and just go to sleep,” you pleaded as you knew that you were going to have to be awake early tomorrow for the long and hectic day that stood ahead.

When your requests went ignored you let out a sigh running your fingers through your hair. You really didn’t want to have to do it but if you wanted any chance of a solid night of sleep then you clearly had no choice.

So you muttered things to yourself as you grabbed your phone charger before you left your room making sure to kiss Gracie’s head on your way out. The way to Mats room was short, Lenasia had shown you where it was just in case you needed it. The thing that took the most time was mustering up the courage to actually knock on that door, it took three soft knocks on the door before Mat shuffled out of bed and opened the door.

Due to the height difference you were met with his chest “what’s up?” He asked as he let out a yawn surprised to see you there.

You rocked on the balls of your feet “can I sleep in here tonight?” You cocked your head hoping he’d say yes “Gracie won’t stop talking.” You added as you rubbed your eyes.

The boy laughed “sure,” he nodded as he motioned to you to come in.

The sight of his room made your heart feel at ease. The two single beds had the left one untouched and the right was where he clearly slept. He never used to have a side of the bed where he slept but when he learnt that you took the left side his only option was to become a right side sleeper.

You sat on what was now your bed as you just stared at the roof. It wasn’t often that you experienced being left speechless given that you were talkative by nature “I’m sorry,” Mat blurted out causing you to lift your head as you looked at him.

When he saw that you were confused he had to continue “for everything I did.” He shoved his hands into his sweatpants as he sat on his own bed.

All you could do was nod “you didn’t so anything wrong Mat.” You sighed as it was the truth. If he had yelled at you or cheated on you it would have made the end of your relationship not feel as forced.

Mat had spent the last few months reflecting “I’m sorry for what I didn’t do then,” he knew that it probably sounded better as your main reason what you had shared for breaking up was the fact that he no longer showed you love.

A smile formed on your lips “thank you,” was all that you could get out as you fiddled with the necklace around your neck.

You felt bare without your M necklace so once you gave it back to him you were quick to get a replacement chain as you needed something on your neck “we should probably go to sleep,” the hockey player announced as he looked at the digital alarm clock that sat on the table between you.

Mat simply hoped that the silence in the dark would give him more time to wrack his brain for things to say to you. Somehow he had all the time in the world whilst having none of the words.

A sigh fell from your lips “goodnight Mat,” you mumbled as you rolled over to let the sleep consume you.

Surprisingly the wedding was going really well. The ceremony was beautiful, you walked out to see Mat and swore you were going to cry but you kept it in because you knew that you’d wind up crying later.

Which was totally true, your tears struck in the middle of the couples speeches. Thankfully for you though you were sat next to Mat after two of the bridesmaids that were sat on either side of you wanted to sit next to each other. The Canadian noticed the sniffle you had as the tears welled up in your eyes, he was quick to lock his hand with yours “you okay?” He murmured into your ear as he shot you a concerned look.

You nodded as you raised your fingers to your face making sure to catch the tears that fell before they ruined your makeup “yeah,” you sighed “that was just really cute.” your confession caused him to chuckle. It hurt you both though because deep down inside as you listened to Ethan make his undying love speech to Lenasia, you both thought about Mat being in his shoes and you being in Lenasias. Your wedding although as hypothetical as it was, it was still something that both of you had thought out in depth having conversations and everything. The type of venue all the way down to the cake had been decided on. Mat would never intend on telling you this but he’s even had your engagement ring ready to go for the last ten months.

He was meant to propose on your big Valentine’s Day bash but with his injury that trip got canceled and so did your proposal.

The air between you two felt dense as people began to separate as they made their ways to the dance floor.

You decided to stay back was you had Gracie on your lap and as a result Mat stayed with you.

It wasn’t something that you expected him to do but nevertheless you appreciated it “she likes your bracelet,” the Canadian pointed out as he smiled.

Gracie made a string of noises before she looked up at the girl “she likes the fact that it’s shiny,” you explained shaking your head as you made funny faces at the girl.

Mat always knew that you were going to be a great mother “always thought you’d be like that to our kids.” He let his filter disappear as it caused your eyes to go wide “our?” You repeated as you hoped you had done so indeed.

You smiled as he nodded “we’d have a girl and a boy.” You had both agreed that you would have a minimum of two children as you both grew up with siblings and felt like if you were to have a child that they should do the same.

This rush of the feeling of content waved through your body “I want you to ask me again.” After only getting two hours of sleep due to the fact that he had been racking his brain for what to say, he had finally come up with the perfect answer.

Despite the not contact for two months, you knew exactly what he was talking about. “Do you love me?” You asked as you took a deep breath.

Whilst you knew that his answer was more than likely yes or else he wouldn’t have told you to ask him, you still felt like his answer might have been like his previous one.

Mat turned his chair so that he could face you “I love you so much that you’re the first thing that I want to see when I wake up and the last thing I want to think of when I go to sleep.” Your heart practically melted at the confession “you are my life, my happy and my world all in one, so I’m sorry I made you feel less than.” Usually be would have stopped with the first co session. Doing things like the second one were meant to be for massive moments.

And a massive moment is what this was.

Your Mat was officially back.

[ingravinoveritas]

(**Warning: Spoilers for the OFMD 2 season finale follow. Read at your own risk.)

I've just watched the finale of season 2 of Our Flag Means Death, and it has stirred a lot of thoughts and feelings in me (as it has many of us, unquestionably). I had initially planned to include some of these thoughts in my review of GO 2 (which I still have not written), but the death of Izzy Hands (Con O'Neill) has brought back some of the feelings I had a few months ago, so I'd like to talk about the theme of ableism in GO 2 and OFMD.

Since the first season, Izzy Hands has seemingly been a polarizing figure, but there has been a clear emotional resonance on the part of fans toward him, and especially now in season 2. To have his arc and "redemption" come in such an ignominious fashion certainly feels like a slap in the face to those fans. I would characterize myself as "Izzy neutral" (that is, I did not hate him, but I didn't necessarily feel a deep connection to him, either), but what troubles me is how Izzy was ultimately treated as a disabled character.

Earlier in episode 8, the Revenge crew is jailed, and Prince Ricky pulls Izzy out of the cell to have a drink, and during this exchange Izzy says this line, which we had previously heard in one of the trailers:

It was Izzy who the writers/creative team specifically chose to have say this line, and because of that, I find it very difficult to swallow the idea that he was the one character who was later killed. That in the end, the character who speaks about belonging is the one who doesn't get to belong. As if he was there to further Ed's storyline, to be an object lesson for him, and was then disposable after that.

Further compounding the issue was the crew using Izzy's prosthetic leg as a grave marker (presumably under the assumption that he no longer needed it). But for many disabled people, prostheses and wheelchairs and other accommodations are what help us thrive in the world and are part of who we are, so to me, taking that away from him inadvertently diminished how complex and multifaceted Izzy had become as a character and seemingly reduced him to little more than a mascot.

As a person on the autism spectrum who works in the field of disability, Izzy's line about belonging resonated with me extremely deeply. For many of us who are neurodivergent or disabled, this is the stuff of our everyday lives--being told through childhood, adolescence, and even adulthood that we are nothing, and that our lives do not have value. I spent so many years searching for that sense of belonging, to know that I had a place in the world, and it was not something anyone could give to me, but something I had to fight for. To make that space, because no one else would.

As I've said before, while I have watched both shows, I am far more into and emotionally connected to GO than OFMD. This leads me to GO season 2, and the parallels to this that I saw there. In GO 2, we have the character of Saraqael (Liz Carr), who is an angel that uses a wheelchair (as does the actor who plays them). It's shown in one of the episodes that Saraqael's power is to miracle wheelchair ramps everywhere they go, and in nearly all of the reviews and articles I've read about the second season, this trait is met with widespread praise.

But to me it mirrored precisely what we see in real life--that is, that the burden of accessibility is often placed on disabled people ourselves. I would have loved to have seen one of the able-bodied angels have not only the power, but the desire to create those ramps. It was disheartening to me to think that even in a seemingly ideal place like Heaven (although we know it certainly isn't), it is the disabled character who has to create a place for themselves.

The character choices around Saraqael and Izzy are something I would describe as benevolent ableism, in that while no harm was likely intended, it still reinforces long-ingrained prejudices and ideas about disability. There is so much intersectionality between queerness and disability as well, and so it is disappointing to see an opportunity to have that idea of "belonging" encompass every character only encompass certain characters instead.

I truly think this will only change if and when we have disabled people behind the camera as well as in front of it. And I hope that day comes sooner rather than later so that all of the fans who see themselves in Izzy or Saraqael are not left feeling the way they do now...

[amuseoffyre]

I got thinking today, while stuck on public transport, about the exchange at the academy:

Stede: You can't be Blackbeard without your... black beard. Ed: Come on, mate, that's all over. It was over years ago. My beard hasn't been black since I was young.

On the surface, Ed is being very literal about it, but as is often the case with him, there's a layer of subtext that goes completely over Stede's head, despite what he knows about Ed and his wish to leave piracy behind.

The subtext here is that he's wanted to stop being Blackbeard for years, ever since he was young, when he first adopted the monicker and persona.

We know that he wasn't Blackbeard when he was on Hornigold's ship. Hornighost in the Gravy Basket calls him Eddie (plus people like Anne, Mary and Izzy - people he knows well). This led me down a mental rabbithole of the information we're given in the gravy basket:

Ed takes Hornigold's presence on a deserted island at face value

"don't you want to know how I ended up here" "mutiny - it's always mutiny"

"last time I saw you, you said you were going to flay my skin off and feed it to me"

Ed's behaviour sliding back into an almost childish petulance, demanding that this pseudo-parent-figure acknowledges what he's done and provides approval

My working theory is that Hornigold's crew mutinied on him when Ed was still in his teens, maybe early 20s. They abandoned him on a deserted island "to let nature do the rest", which is why Ed isn't surprised to a) see him there, b) find him living off the stuff around him and c) dressed in scraps that he may have found from a wreck.

So this is when Ed stops being Eddie (except for occasional people who have known him since his youth) but before he becomes Blackbeard. I'm betting on this still happening when he was young, because Jack refers to him as Blackie and the frat-boy energy they both share suggests that this was what it was like in their post-Hornigold days. (Also supported by Yardies and Whippies - Jack tossing -ie on the end of words to yell it)

For the first time, they're the ones making the rules, doing what they want, ruling the roost. Ed holds onto this new name the same way he holds onto his weapons. There's implicit suggestion that he also tries to shield his real name by using Blackbeard instead, hammering home that this is the name that must be used - "Ed. The Blackie I knew woulda snapped your neck for calling him that" - "his name is Blackbeard or Captain, dog!"

And for a long while it's useful - it's a good, strong name. It becomes legendary as he fights for his survival and keeps staying alive, and is smart and cunning and skillful enough to rapidly rise up the unofficial ranks of the pirates of the Republic.

Only Ed gets left behind, trapped behind the beard and the name that goes with it. He has to maintain the status quo, keep doing what pirates do, and stay alive. Because, after all, the only way out that he knows of is death.

It hasn't been black since he was young. He hasn't really been Blackbeard since he was young.

[rhoorl]

Working Title | Extra: Dieter's Morning

Pairing: Dieter Bravo x OFC Belle

Rating: Mature, 18+, for the love of all things please don’t engage if you are a minor ok? 

Word Count: 4.7k

Series Masterlist

Chapter Summary: What if we took the events from Chapter 6 and saw them from Dieter’s perspective?

Warnings: This chapter has some swearing. I don’t want to spoil anything, but here’s just a blanket “there could be adult stuff happening” warning. There is also a brief mention of Dieter’s former substance abuse issues, including an overdose. 

DIETER: Sweet dreams, Belle.

Dieter smiled to himself, rereading the short text exchange with Belle. He didn't sleep great most nights, but with the anticipation of having some time alone with her in the morning, he knew sleep was almost a lost cause for tonight.

Feeling a little antsy, he walked over to his kitchen for a snack. The box of cookies on the counter made his heart flutter a bit. He's relieved that the surprise went over well. It wasn't the grandest of gestures he could muster, but something about it just felt right for the two of them. 

From the outside, many assumed his love language was giving gifts. He was always generous with his family, friends, and those who worked for him. That same generosity was extended and, more often than not, exploited by his past lovers. 

What he valued more than anything else was quality time. Through therapy and introspection, he realized just how much his previous romantic relationships revolved around things he could give someone – drugs, sex, money, clout.

But Belle seemed different. Tonight at the party he felt so relaxed talking with her, even though he was flustered as hell. It was an exciting and new feeling for him, but also made a lot of his insecurities and vulnerabilities bubble to the surface.

He tried to calm his mind down enough for sleep. Tucking himself into bed, he set an alarm for the next morning – even though he knew he would be up well before it. His mind continued racing, so he tried closing his eyes to quell the swirl, but it didn't work.

She seemed to like the gift, right? Danny thought it was a good idea. I wonder what Liz is going to think … she’s probably going to think I’m doing too much too soon. Ugh, I need to go to sleep. Sleep. Go. To. Sleep. Dieter.

Frustrated, he let out a huff and threw the covers off, heading to the balcony. He needed to be outside to feel the breeze and hear the waves. Any type of water sound was always his go-to when using a sound machine or app to relax, but having the real thing was even better. Eventually, he felt himself getting drowsy so he crawled over to his bed.

His eyes fluttered open, checking his phone for the time. 

Hmm, 4, not bad.

He sat up in bed catching up on the family group chat. His brother’s family was on a trip to Disneyland that Dieter organized for them. He got them a VIP tour and put them up in the best room. He smiled as he scrolled through the photos, wishing he could be there making memories with them. Then, out of the corner of his eye, he saw a warm glow emanating from the room next door. 

I wonder if Belle is up. I should text her. No, it’s so early. She’s probably going to turn the light off soon.

Ten minutes turned to twenty minutes, and he noticed the light was still on in her room. He thought he heard the sound of her balcony door sliding open, so he decided to throw on a T-shirt to go check.

He quietly stepped outside, seeing her sitting on a lounger. It looked like she was doing some breathing exercises that looked similar to what he would do when he tried to center himself. 

You should probably say something to her. It’s going to be creepy as fuck if she opens her eyes and sees you staring at her. 

“I knew I should have suggested we meet earlier,” he said in a raspy voice.

She jumped a little at his voice, clearly startled. 

Great move jackass.

He noticed she was in the same pajamas as the day before and he felt his face get warm.

Don’t look at her boobs, keep your eyes on her face. She’s so pretty.

She stared at him wide-eyed, clearly surprised to see him on the balcony again, and so early too. 

“We really have to stop meeting like this,” he winked.

“Ha, s-sorry I … did I wake you?” She pointed toward the light coming from her bedroom.

“Oh, ah,” rubbing the back of his neck.“I was already up. I was a-actually going to text you but it was so early,” he said looking down.

“You can always text me.” 

Oh. Ok, I like the sound of that.

He smiled, “Oh, well, that’s good to know.” His eyes betrayed him as he gazed down her body, stopping when he noticed her crossing her arms over her chest. “So, looks like we’re both up.”

“Yea.”

“I believe I promised you a hot cup of coffee,” he teased. “So, wanna have coffee now?”

“Uh yea, let me go grab the cookies.” She started to turn toward her room to go fetch the cookies.

I don’t want to do this across the balcony. I want her here. Fuck it.

“Hey, wait!” he called over. As she turned around he mustered enough courage to say, “Uh, you can totally say no, I won’t … ugh … um, do you want to come over here?”

“To your room?”

Ugh fuck. That was too much. Too bold.

“Uh…” he looked around nervously. Fuck, she thinks I’m some creep now. “Uh, nevermind mind, we ca-”

“No, it’s ok.”

“What?”

“I can come over. Can you give me a few minutes?”

“Yea,” he exhaled. “Yea, take all the time you need.”

“Ok. Uh, I’ll knock?”

“Yea, sounds good.”

They both stayed locked in each other’s gaze for a moment. Dieter was mesmerized by her eyes, trying to get a read of what she was feeling or thinking. He couldn’t help the grin that came across his face, noticing that she was reciprocating. Time seemed to stand still. Eventually, she was the one who snapped him out of his trance.

“Oh ok, I’ll be over soon.”

“Ok.”

She scurried into her room, but Dieter still couldn’t move. Knowing that she was going to be in his space, close to him again made him a little giddy, and frankly turned on. He wasn't expecting anything physical to happen, but just seeing Belle in her little sleep shorts and tank top, her nipples just barely poking through the cotton made him excited. He couldn’t help how his body was reacting and how thankful he was that she wasn't there to see it.

Fuck. I need to take a shower. A cold shower.

But first, he made a quick call down to room service. He wasn’t sure how Belle took her coffee, so he asked for them to bring up a few different options for milk and sweeteners. 

“I hate to be this guy, but could you hurry?” he asked the person who took his order.

“Absolutely, Mr. Bravo, it will be upstairs in 10 minutes.”

Knowing he had limited time, he decided to quickly hop in the shower to stave off any feelings of lust that were further infiltrating his system. Within no time, he was back dressed again, toweling off his hair and heading to the kitchen.

He heard a knock at his door, his stomach flipping thinking it was Belle. He looked through the peephole and saw a hotel worker with a cart.

“Oh hey, come on in,” he opened the door for the man who wheeled the cart in.

“Good morning, Mr. Bravo. Where should I set this?”

“Ugh, the kitchen is fine, thank you.”

The man quickly placed the different containers of milk on the counter followed by a dish of assorted sweeteners.

“Anything else you need, Mr. Bravo?”

“No-” looking at the man’s name tag “Lou. No, Lou, I’m all set. Thanks for getting up here so fast.” He grabbed his wallet and fished out a twenty-dollar bill, handing it over to the man.

“Absolutely, you’re very welcome.”

Once Lou was out of the room, Dieter went back to the kitchen counter, fidgeting with the placement of the containers, trying to busy himself to keep the nerves at bay.

He looked at the clock, it had been almost half an hour since he and Belle parted ways. 

I wonder if she decided not to come. Well, maybe I’ll just head over there. No, that is not a good idea.

He couldn’t handle this inner battle so, without thinking, he opened the door surprised to see Belle.

“Shit, I’m sorry, I really don’t mean to keep scaring you,” he chuckled. “I was starting to think you may have changed your mind.”

“Oh, sorry! I … uh I couldn’t find my…flip-flops!” she laughed nervously.

Oh, she changed. I like this outfit. Fuck, she looks good.

“You didn’t have to change for me,” he said looking her up and down, voice going a little bit lower than he intended. “But I’m not complaining.”

A little forward, but she seems to be ok with it.

“Come on in,” he opened the door, letting her pass by him before closing it and ushering her to the kitchen. “Here, let’s get you your coffee.” 

He wanted to touch her or bring her into an embrace. He lightly put his hand on her back as a compromise to himself. He took a breath as his fingers caught the warmth emanating from the sliver of her exposed skin between her pants and top.

“Uh, I never asked how you took your coffee, so I uh … I got you some options,” he said biting the inside of his cheek. “I called down to room service and they sent up half and half, skim milk, oat milk, almond milk,” pointing to each container. “And then there’s different sweeteners over here too. Sugar, Stevia, Splenda.” 

He had to admit that he was pretty proud of himself for not only thinking through different options but for having it arrive on time too.

She didn’t say anything, her eyes grazing over the kitchen island, taking everything in. 

Ugh, shit. I overdid it, didn't I?

“Uh. Sorry, this was probably too much…I always do too much,” he mumbled to himself, ruffling his hand through his hair.

“Wha-what, no! No, sorry, I just. I’ve never...um, I usually just take it black…most of the time."

She’s being sweet. I got too excited, I did too much. She’s going to get weirded out.

“But, I do have … um …oat milk from time to time in my coffee. It was this one, right?” she asked, pointing to one of the containers.

“Uh-uh yea, that one,” he gave a small smile. 

“Ok,” she said as she grabbed the container, looking around for a coffee cup.

“Oh, here, let me,” he moved around her to pour a cup. He didn’t think she’s being one hundred percent truthful so as he handed the cup back to her he decided to tease her a bit. “So you take it black all the time, huh?”

“Yea. Uh-” Caught you. “Shit. Uh, no I mean -”

“It’s ok,” he laughs. 

“You caught me,” she put her hands up in surrender. “I just take it black…all the time.”

“I guess you’re sweet enough, huh,” he winks.

She gives another nervous laugh, not meeting his eye contact and instead looking down at the ground.

“Ugh sorry that was pretty lame, right?”

“No, it was cute.”

Oh, okay. 

“Aww you think I’m cute?” he wanted to get closer so he leaned up against the counter next to her.

She blushes, still not being able to meet his eyes.

“Sorry, I was just messing with you,” he says playfully, knocking her shoulder to get her to smile. She has the most beautiful smile. “So, uh, let’s go outside? I want to try some more of those cookies.” 

He grabbed her tote off the counter, swinging it over his shoulder and collecting their coffee cups, leading the way outside.

She took a seat in a lounger. Not wanting this much distance between them, Dieter dragged the other lounger closer.

“So, what did you decide on?” 

She fished one of the boxes randomly out of the bag, “I brought the…coffee-flavored one.”

“Good choice, coffee squared." Lame fucking joke Dee.

“Ha, Yea, and then there’s…” she went to grab another box, “chocolate chip.”

“Solid.” 

Is there another box in there? There has to be right? 

Dieter’s mouth turned up a bit at the prospect of what flavor he was hoping she would pull out of the tote.

“And last, but not least … macadamia nut,” she said, dramatically pulling the last box out of her bag.

Hell yea.

“You brought the macadamia nut one? Good girl.”

He looked from her eyes down to her lips, biting his lower lip slightly. He heard her breath hitch as she squirmed a little bit in the chair. Although it was still a bit dark outside, he could see she was a bit flushed.

“Ha, I uh, I take direction well, what can I say.”

Dieter's brain short-circuited and he felt a surge deep in his groin. He suddenly had a flash to Belle sprawled out on his bed, his head in between her legs and she writhed in pleasure. Trying to hide the growing bulge in his shorts, he shifted in his seat and tried to inconspicuously adjust himself.

Belle kept her eyes on him, taking in his flustered state. He was thankful when he saw her gaze shift down to one of the boxes of cookies, fishing out a cookie and splitting it in half.

"We can share, that way we don't get too full?"

Their fingers brushed against each other slightly as she passed off the half to Dieter. He so desperately wanted to just take her hand in his.

Dieter racked his brain trying to think of something to talk to her about. 

This is so unlike me to be at a loss for words.

He cleared his throat, “So uh…Indy said you’ve known each other since you were little?”

He took a bite of his cookie as he waited for her reply.

“Uh yea. I guess I can’t remember a time when I’ve ever not known Indy. Our moms worked together and were pregnant at the same time. They even had a joint baby shower at work because once their boss found out they were both having girls he figured he could save money by just having one party with one cake,” she laughs, taking a bite.

He smiles seeing her relax a bit more as she talks about her best friend. “So then, which one of you is older?”

“Technically me. Indy gives off that big sister energy but she's two months younger.”

“Do you have any siblings?”

“No, just Indy. And her brother Ben. They’re like family.”

“That’s nice.”

“D-do you have any siblings?”

“Uh yea, I have a brother. He’s younger, like five years younger than me. He’s married with kids.”

“Oh, I bet you are a fun uncle!” 

I haven't always been. Those kids deserve the world.

“Ha, I didn’t always use to be,” he says, rubbing the back of his neck. “I was a pretty shitty uncle for a while there, but these last few years have been awesome. They’re such cool fucking kids,” he smiled, but some melancholy settled in as the thought about the years he wasted and could never get back.

“Well, that’s awesome you can have that time with them now."

“Yea, it really is.”

He heard his phone buzzing, frustrated that something was interrupting his time getting to know her more.

Goddammit Liz of all the fucking times for you to call.

“Ugh, sorry I- I have to get this, it’s Liz. If I don’t answer she’ll freak out and keep calling til I pick up…old habits." 

She'll send the goddamn calvary.

“No, I get it. Need me to go?”

He mouthed no and motioned for her to stay.

"Hey, Lizzie…"

"You got her a surprise didn't you?" He could hear the smirk in her voice. 

Danny must have told her.

"Yea…"

“Did she like it?”

“Uh huh.”

“Did she spend the night Dee?”

“No…” He looked over apologetically at Belle that this conversation is even happening.

“Hmm ok. That was probably too early anyway. Hey, I’ll be out in a few days.”

“Ok, sounds good.”

“Don’t forget we have that interview.”

“Uh huh.” He wanted to get her off the phone as quickly as possible.

“And we need to figure out who is going to do your hair and makeup. Can you ask Meredith?”

“I will.”

“Ooo wait! Let’s have Belle do it. You’ll be able to spend all day with her-”

“Ok Liz, byeee!” He cut her off, hanging up the phone quickly. “Sorry about that,” he chuckled.

“All good, Liz is your…agent, right?”

“Yea…” he wasn’t sure where she was going with this.

“Oh, it’s just that I think she knows Indy’s agent Rhys.”

Oh duh! Rhys is Indy’s agent!

“Yea! Rhys! Rhys used to work for Lizzie. I’ve known him since he started.”

“Oh, cool! So, you’ve been with Liz for a long time, then?”

“Yea, since I was 20. She’s the only agent I’ve ever had, she’s been there through a lot.”

Dieter didn’t like thinking about his past too often. He’s made a lot of progress, but there are certain events that were still hard for him to process. And the unfortunate part is that Liz has been there through it all. She was the one who walked in on him when he overdosed, administering the Narcan to him just in time. She had been there for his countless trips to rehab, all the times he said he was going to do better and didn’t. He kept failing her, but she never gave up on him. 

He started rubbing his hands along his thighs, trying to center himself.

“Well, she must mean a lot to you after all of these years,” she gave a small smile.

She has to know about all of the shit that was in the press, right? Fuck. Even so, she doesn’t want to interrogate me or lecture me. She’s just … listening. 

“Yea, she’s never given up on me,” he confessed.

Dieter was a bit uncomfortable about how raw and vulnerable things were starting to feel, but he felt almost empowered by Belle’s compassion. All he craved at this point was her touch. He wanted to wrap his arms around her and ground himself in her presence. 

They looked at each other for a moment, before she leaned over and reached for his hand, giving it a squeeze.

“It’s great you have someone like that.”

I want someone like you. 

He always fell fast, but even he was surprised at himself for how quickly he was already falling for Belle. Trying to snap himself out of his thought process, he decided to try another cookie, breaking it in half and giving her a piece.

“Enough about me,” he chuckled, wanting to get the conversation off of him and back focused on her. He angled his body to face her. “I want to know more about you.”

“Me? Oh, I’m not that exciting.”

“Oh, I don’t believe that.” 

They spent the next couple of hours talking about everything from favorite movies and TV shows, he found out she was a huge Jurassic Park fan. They debated whether or not pineapple belongs on pizza, even though she was wrong it was cute to see how passionate she was. And they talked about what they wanted to be as kids, she wanted to be a teacher. 

The conversation flowed freely. She was funny, smart, and easy to talk to, and radiated empathy.

After a while, Dieter noticed that they were both out of coffee. Pointing to her cup he asked if she wanted more.

“Uh yea, maybe a little bit more before I head out,” she looked at her phone checking the time.

No, I don’t want you to leave. I don’t want this moment to be over yet.

“I uh … since tomorrow is officially our first day, I want to make sure I have time to get everything done,” she explained. “Plus, we have to prep for a meeting with the cast.”

“No, I get it, here let’s go,” he got up and led the way back to the kitchen. 

Once there, he filled her cup about halfway and handed it back to her. 

“I, I really liked this.”

“The coffee? Yea, it's pretty good. Dan says it's local too,” he chuckled

“No, I mea- … it’s nice to talk to someone…and have them listen,” she smiled.

You don’t even know.

“Oh. Yeah, it is. W-would you want to do this again?”

“Have coffee? Yea!”

“I meant talk,” he said softly.

“Oh. Oh yea, I’d love to.” 

Hearing this admission made Dieter’s eyes instantly light up.

“What about tonight? You’re probably busy…but if you’re not, and you’re looking for something to do, I think … uh … I’d like to see you again.”

Dammit Dee, you’re rambling and also smothering her, give her space.

“I’m not busy tonight,” she cut him off. “Text me and we’ll figure something out.”

Rubbing the back of his neck, “Yea, ok sounds good. No pressure though, I don’t want you getting sick of me.”

She closed the distance between them and put a hand on his forearm before saying in a flirty tone, “I very much doubt that.” 

Her touch was electric, igniting something in him he didn’t even know was there. Now it was his turn to suck in his breath. She smiled, put down her cup, and grabbed her bag to leave.

"Wait,” he said as she turned back towards him. “We never tried the macadamia one," he smirked, looking at her mouth where that sinful moan emanated from the morning before. 

I can’t wait to hear that again.

She bites her lips, looking down coyly, but there was something almost devilish in her eyes. 

Is she flirting with me?

"I don't think you're ready for that again," she said as she slowly turned away and looked over your shoulder.

Images raced through his brain wondering how she would feel, sound, taste. As she headed toward the door, Dieter felt compelled to do something, so he reached for her arm as she turned back to look at him.

“C-can I give you a hug?” he said with big puppy dog eyes. 

A hug is innocent enough, right?

“Yea, I’d like that.” 

He smiled and covered the space between the two of them. He wrapped his arms around her waist as she rose up on her tiptoes to wrap her arms around his neck. Bringing her in closer, Dieter nuzzled his face into the crook of her neck, taking a deep breath. He had to resist the urge to pepper kisses down her neck, so he just hovered his lips centimeters from her.

She smells like citrus and something sweet.

He felt her breath on his neck, sending a pulse down his spine. The proximity made his cock grow. The two stayed in this embrace for what felt like minutes. Dieter could feel himself relaxing, being held like this gave him a sense of safety.

She feels like home.

He could have stayed like this longer, but unfortunately, his dick was starting to take over and he didn't want to do anything to jeopardize the tender moment they'd shared. But still, he had to get at least one more flirty comment in.

As he started to pull away he brought his mouth to her ear, whispering "For the record, I am very much ready for the macadamia ones again." 

He pulled back from her, bringing his arms from around her waist to rest on her forearms, rubbing small circles down them.

“I hope you have a great day, don’t work too hard,” he winked.

She looked flustered, blushing, and barely able to look at him.

“You too."

Shit, was this too much too soon? No Dee, get it together. You once fucked a girl after knowing her for five minutes. Giving someone a hug is literally fine.

Trying to gauge where her mind was he cleared his throat asking if he could text her later. Seeing her nod and give a little smile he exhaled, relaxing a bit at the confirmation that she too wanted to still see him later.

“Ok, sounds good.” He smiled and watched her walk out the door, discreetly trying to check her out. He had been trying to be respectful, stealing glances whenever she looked away.

Once he closed the door, he turned resting his back against it, leaning his head back, and closing his eyes. Today was going to be full of meetings and the script read-through, so he didn't have too much time to organize something grand.

You don't need something grand. Something that is special to her … to us.

Dieter thought of ideas as he walked back into the kitchen, leaning against the kitchen island, elbows propped up with his head in his hands.

Think. Think. Think.

He turned his head slightly and caught a glimpse of the bag of coffee he used this morning. The wheels in his head started turning, so he reached for his phone to call Danny.

"Hey, Dieter! I was trying to let ya sleep in a bit. What's up?"

"Did you say the coffee in the room is local?"

"Wha- ye- yea. Why?"

"Is it like the cookie place, can you visit it?"

"Are we going on another adventure today?" Danny chuckled, amused that his boss was so smitten. 

"Yes. Well, not with you. Can I borrow the car this afternoon after the meetings wrap up?"

"Ooo, are you going to take her?" 

"Near this coffee place, are there places to eat … like for dinner?"

"Ohhhh okay, I see how this is. You’re going to ignore my questions,” Danny chuckled. “But to answer your question, yea there are places to eat out that way.”

"Do you think you can help me get some details ready for this afternoon?"

"Are you kidding? I love this stuff."

After he hung up with Danny, Dieter started cleaning up the kitchen a bit, putting the containers of milk into his fridge and tidying up the counter.

He got himself dressed for the day and grabbed the script to reread it. With his glasses and a bottle of water in one hand, and the script in the other, he headed to the balcony. He took breaks, closing his eyes, trying to listen to the calming waves, but his thoughts went immediately to Belle. Her smile, her eyes, the way she felt in his arms as if they were two puzzle pieces.

His thoughts were broken up by a sound he couldn't quite place. Opening his eyes he strained to try and make out where this noise was emanating from. To him, it sounded like heavy breathing and moaning as if someone wa-

Holy shit. Is she?

Dieter got up and walked to the edge of his balcony, peering over to Belle's. He noticed that her balcony door was open, confirming that the sounds were coming from her room.

She is totally getting herself off. Fuck. 

Part of him wanted to give her some privacy, but that part of him was quickly being drowned out by the part controlled by his dick. He was quickly getting more and more turned on. It sounded like she was getting close as her breathing and gasping increased. He felt himself growing, stretching against his pants, so he palmed his crotch a bit to relieve some pressure.

Is she about to say my name? No there's no fucking way. This is so fucking hot, though. If I was younger I would fucking jump this distance between these balconies and head in there to help.

He heard her come undone, gasping for breath.

"Fuuuuuck," he could faintly hear her say as she tried to catch her breath.

"Fuck," he softly repeated.

The images in his mind raced through all of the different ways he wanted her. He wondered what she looked like when she came, just knowing it had to be one of the most beautiful sights and hoping he’d be lucky enough to see it sometime. Craving that knowledge and now armed with more evidence as to what she sounded like, he walked into the living room and quickly unbuckled his pants, sitting on the couch. He came in near record time after spending the entire morning trying to keep it at bay. As he sat there panting, his mind wandered.

She is either going to be the best or worst thing to ever happen to me.

A/N: This little extra was purely self-indulgent on my part … I was curious what Dieter was up to and thinking. We’ll find out more about these plans Dieter has in Chapter 7. As always, thank you so much for taking time out of your day to read my little story. It means so much!

Tag list: @musings-of-a-rose / @legendary-pink-dot / @bitchwitch1981 / @mysterious-moonstruck-musings / @gracie7209 / @amneris21 / @pastelnap / @maryfanson / @sunnywithachanceofjavi / @sin-djarin / @winchestergypsy90

[themosleyreview]

The Mosley Review: The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare

Do you wanna know why we constantly revisit World War II in film? It isn't because it was the greatest war. It isn't because of the enginuity that came from it. Its because it features the most robust stories ever to be told or discovered whether its from the American or the European campaign. There are probably hundreds of classified documents that are still sealed to this day and it is always fascinating to see them revealed. Yes, we love the heroism in the stories about the front lines, but what's more interesting to see is the internal planning of all Allied Forces and how they're plans get executed. Whether they succeed or fail is the real drama and the stuff of legend that ends up inspiring fictional characters we all know and love. That is what this film lovingly highlights and I have to say it was a smooth and joyful ride has good suspense with great action and comedy. The tone was a bit off at times as it would struggle with wanting to be a smart espionage driven story and a adventure film with little consequence for the heroes in the story.

Henry Cavill truly charms every moment he's on screen as Gus March-Phillipps. He was a fun leader of the ragtag team of mercenaries and I liked his controlled nature. He never really seemed to have doubts, but he did have a moment or too that he felt challenged. The amount of glee and calm he has in this film was cool in the more action driven scenes. The most standout moment of the film truly comes from his introductive scene as within in five minutes, you understand the man and his motivation. Alan Ritchson was good and brutal as his fellow merc, Anders Lassen. I liked the banter he had with Gus as the film went along and how eager and efficient of a Nazi killer he was. Henry Golding was fun and smart as the explosive expert of the team, Freddy Alvarez. The banter between him and Anders was fun as they would tease each other often. Hero Fiennes Tiffin was good as Henry Hayes and even though he didn't have that much depth, he was effective and a valued navigator in the war occupied Atlantic Ocean. Alex Pettyfer was cool and collected as Gus's oldest friend, Geoffrey Appleyard. You really felt the bond and history between them in the scenes that they had together. Cary Elwes is always a joy to see on screen and as Brigadier Gubbins 'M', he was perfectly royal and commanding as the leader of the secret operation the team is recruited for. Freddie Fox was good as the iconic Ian Fleming and I loved that he was apart of the operation from beginning to end. He wasn't a forgotten character and I liked that he seemed to plotting out his soon to be famous character. Rory Kinnear was fantastic and steadfast as Winston Churchill. He had a dominating presence and sense of urgency that is needed for the legendary Prime Minister. Eiza González and Babs Olusanmokun were fantastic as Marjorie Stewart and Mr. Heron. Their chemistry together was great and I enjoyed their convert planning and business deals. Eiza charms the screen with such control in her more tense dialogue scenes and Babs was that quiet type of dangerous that you never saw coming. Til Schweiger is always intense as a hero or villain and as Heinrich Luhr, there is an amount of sinister motivation in his eyes that made him the marquee antagonist.

The score by the director's frequent collaborator, Christopher Benstead, was good, quirkie and epic toward the end of the film. I felt the tension in the finale the most thanks to his score as the action kicks off and the plan doesn't go as smooth. Like I said before, the tone was a little all over the place at times since you have so many parts moving at once. Director Guy Ritchie's flair for elaborate planning was on display, but it felt a little rusty in its execution. Its a massive cast so not everyone has a chance to have a moment to shine outside of the action. Maybe some of them didn't really have much to work with or the real people in the true story the film was based on weren't that deep. Either way, I still had fun with the film and I enjoyed the action. Is it gonna be one of the most memorable films of Guy Ritchie's filmography, no, but it'll be a fun one to view once in awhile. Let me know what you thought of the film or my review in the comments below. Thanks for reading!

[cant-get-no-worse]

So, I'm a relatively new FCB fan and I've been doing some research about why the club had a downfall. What I understood was that everything went to shit since Neymar left. Plus he didn't even have any legit reason to leave apart from more money being offered by PSG. People say he left because he was in "Messi's shadow" but that's not true. All I saw was love and appreciation for him by the fans and his fellow players. Especially Messi. He treated him with so much love and respect. Even now, after going through so much shit at PSG, Neymar doesn't seem to want to leave that club. In my opinion, he is one reason why Barcelona went downhill. The club spent so much money on his replacements which all ended in failure. I think if he hadn't left at that time, Barcelona would be in a relatively better place right now. Maybe I'm wrong but that's what I interpreted. Please correct me if I'm getting it wrong or if I missed some important thing amidst all of this. I have nothing against Neymar, he's a wonderful player, but I can't help but put a little blame on him.

Hii ! I love ranting about this stuff, so warning: long ass ramble, I'm putting it beneath.

I think it's fairly common for people to assume Neymar's departure in 2017 was the thing that started FCB "downfall" (which is a pretty dramatic term in of itself), because it's such a public move that made everyone talk. It's a transfer whose consequences on the market value of players and the way we appreciate those is still underappreciated; genuinely, that Neymar saga is mad, it changed everything (to me, for the worse). But the decline of FCB, the institution, began way earlier than 2017. 2017 is kind of, the first most visible consequence of every prior stuff.

Everything was a mess by 2006/2008, for the team & institutionally wise. It got better from 2008 - 2012, under Pep Guardiola (coach) & Laporta/Rosell (presidents, although both not v good men) & which is now commonly referred to as the "golden age" of FCB's recent History. Then, from 2012 on, everything kind of started to decline. It's not very visible since we won the treble in 2014-2015 (KING SHIT VISCA BARÇA VISCA CATALUNYA etc. etc.) , but already behind the scenes it was rocky as hell. Political stuff, power struggles within the board, etc. Even that 2014-2015 "golden" season was a mess, what with the breach of the Transfer Regulations (we couldn't sign players until 2016), firing of our sporting director, firing of medical/staff members, lies about state of finances, restriction of said finances, Messi/Enrique/Chelsea conflict, etc. That 2014-2015 team winning the Treble effectively masked to posterity & the general public how fucked up the club's politics were at that time. But on the long run, that bad gestion did end up affecting that team that arguably should've gone on to win way more in 2016 - 2017, what with the bunch of talents we had in hands.

Then there was the Neymar stuff in 2017, Iniesta leaving in 2018. Of course, by then the mess that was the cub began to reflect on our style of play; by 2017/2018 already we weren't playing as good as we had. There were moments of brilliance of course, games to remember, iconic ones, but still. It was already falling, there were ovious issues, weaknesses, boring times, some alarming performances. I think that 2018-2019 UCL campaign symbolizes everything that had changed since that 2015 UCL ; we didn't have a team, we had one guy, surrounded by too unstable performances from players around. As football proves times and times again, you can have the current best player in the world, if he's alone, you'll never win shit. You'll win games, not competitions. That's the beauty of the sport, you need a team, or you'll go nowhere. Ultimately that "downfall" confirmed itself by more harsh and evident results, with the 2019-2022 period being rock bottom. Jesus Christ that period.

As for that Neymar stuff: it's so real complicated. And not as black/white as it appears. As a FCB supporter, when he left, I despised his guts for a bunch of years, genuinely. Many still do, just look at the comments under the rumors of his comeback; large portion of culers don't want him there, because we really saw it as a treason. A guy who left for money and some more fame. I guess you can say the fact that most culers still haven't swallowed that pill six years later is a testament to how much we loved him.

First, let me state that it's fucking tragic, for him as for the club. He left at his prime and, arguably, wasted it at PSG (tell anyone from 2015 that Neymar Jr doesn't have a single Ballon d'Or to his name and they'll rightfully laugh at your face) ; while Barca drowned as well, failing to find a proper replacement (FCB players were upset with the board at that failure), as you said. Had he stayed, as Pep said, and had the club managed itself better (but that in itself prompts the argument of: could they really? After all the decline started in 2014?) we could've won at least one, if not two UCLs. Honestly, now that we can take a few steps back and reflect, it seems none of the parties (except PSG, who propelled itself forward on the European scene) benefited from that move. But in truth, there can be a million reasons he left. We don't know if it was a personnal initiative or one of his family. We don't know how the Remontada and the aftermath really affected this decision. We don't know if he's the one that wanted to step out of « Messi's shadow » or if his father/agent pushed him to. We don't know if it's because Barcelona rendered public some elements of his contract, effectively breaking the trust his side had towards the club. This mess is a mix of money, ego, power, ambition, personnal relationships, psychological stuff in the brain of a 25 years old and his surroundings, Barcelona being Messi's club (whether you want it or not, it has been true since 2009. Barcelona and Messi were (still remain) synonymous, and that in itself paused a problem later on), PR/image manipulation/communication, and background stuff we'll probably never know of/or much later. The guy even pushed to comeback to Barcelona a mere year or two later. The whole Messi part is a theater play in of itself, between a starstruck kid who went on to play with his idol, who became friends and formed the most successfull Trident of the decade with him, who upon each occasion praises him and rambles about their friendship/love for each other, yet leaves. I mean, the guy reportedly told others he was leaving the club on Messi's wedding, without telling Leo - if that doesn't indicates you how fucked up/messy it was in his own head, Jesus. And yet the friendship Neymar had with other FCB players showed through the very summer he left, what with them posting a pic together following the legal actions of FCB against him. So yeah.

I think part of why he stayed at PSG after they retained him from going back to Barcelona is because he's, like every great player, a winner, he wants to get everything, he genuinely wants to give Paris what he came to do, but also cause, in the long run, he's trapped himself there. The more time passed the more it became that kind of need: he wanted/needed his move to mean something, he wanted that UCL so he could feel like he didn't waste so much time and talent and prime there. All in all, it's a bit tragic, I could ramble about it for hours but I'm gonna cut it short now cause that's not your ask lmfao.

Conclusion to the essay: Neymar's transfer to PSG didn't start anything, rather was the consequence and the accelerator of a decline that began years prior in the institution's background. Hope it helped bring some elements to the table, anon! ❤️

[peachjagiya]

https://www.tumblr.com/peachjagiya/747891487375753216/im-not-a-shipper-and-definitely-in-no-way-a-jkkr

I hope you don’t see this as me being combative. I am honestly just trying to understand something.

I am aware that not everything the members tell fans is the truth and i certainly know that sometimes they will flat out lie or tell half truths to protect their privacy and themselves and I 100% get that. What i don’t get though is why they would lie about not seeing each other? Also, why do you get to pick and choose what you think is a lie and what you think is the truth? Isn’t it possible that they could also lie about things that reinforce your belief? I would not expect them to admit to things that could clearly out them as a couple but there are just certain instances where there is no point in lying. For example, on Jk’s birthday in 2022, Jin went over to his place and started naming all members and asking if they had come to greet Jk and Jk said Hobi and Jimin came over and when Jin asked about Tae, Jk said he didn’t come. In this case why would Jk lie? He could just group tae in with the rest who came and that wouldn’t be weird or suspicious would it?

The example you gave about Jk and sex don’t really fall in line with what i am saying. Jk never said he has never dated did he? He didn’t even say he isn’t dating, he said he doesn’t have a girlfriend but not having a girlfriend at that particular point in time doesn’t mean he never had one. He knew the implications of saying he knows everthing he has to know yet he still made it clear that at the moment, he didn’t need a girlfriend and just wanted to concentrate on work.

You don’t have any concrete proof that your ship is real, all you have are moments and the things they say. If you begin to doubt everything they say unless it is something that reinforces your belief then don’t you think that is a problem? You cannot decide that they lied just because they said something you didn’t want to hear. Besides why would Tae be able to openly tell everyone Jk sings a song for him yet he can’t admit that he saw Jk on his birthday? Or why would Jk be able to tell everyone that Tae heard his song first yet he lies about knowing where Tae is? You see how you pick and choose? If you really believe that they lie about simple things like this to protect themselves or not out themselves then why would Tae post a facetime pic of himself and jk both shirtless knowing that a huge part of this fandom ships them? I don’t think it makes sense.

Not combative at all. It's fair points.

I mean... Maybe Tae just didn't see him on his birthday. And maybe that's not a problem? Maybe Tae had other plans for celebrating with JK? Like we don't know but I know a ton of people who simply don't value their birthday. I've not seen my wife on her birthday every single year.

I don't always take it as face value if it benefits Taekook either to be honest. In the more personal lives, yes for sure.

But if it's true that we're not supposed to think of them as even close, and there's evidence to suggest that's how it's been presented, if they're saying they are close, I do pay attention to that. Because it's not the company line and there's no benefit to lying.

2018, JK has a mental health situation.

2018, Tae has a mental health situation.

Jin, I cannot remember when but it doesn't matter: "Jungkook wasn't talking to any members"

2018 Festa: "I received the text" "the other text was to me"

2023 Suchwita: "Me and Jungkook were reading those texts together."

Conclusion: JK was talking to one of the members. But Jin couldn't say "he wasn't talking to anyone except Taehyung."

Jin isn't a liar. Jin is either unaware or leaving that detail out. Either way...? There's Taekook stuff they're either unaware of or aware of but omitting.

Slowly the bigger picture is revealed. All Tae does is expand upon what we already knew and fill in what was left out. So I do tend to listen more to those extra details, yeah.

As for why they'd ever say anything about their relationship... I think they've been braver with the freedom of hiatus and I also don't expect them to be able to hide it without going slightly insane.

[nightswithkookmin]

I'm not a jikooker because I prefer jimin with another member I ship him with..jimin is someone so affectionate and caring towards the people around him. With this jm is close to each member but somehow for some reason its always jikook who are spotted hanging out together off schedule. so many sightings from army spotting them in a restaurant and restaurants confirming this.the DVD memory 90% is jikook ofc the company favors them more that's why they film only their moments. because honestly as I ship jm with another pason I tend to always spot jikook together that it pisses me off so much.have had enaf of them together.no hate to jk but he should leave jm alone sometimes not hovering around him all the time duh!my question the latest run bts suga said "that's smth a couple would do" I mean why do they feel the need to highlight that all the time? Thats weird 😭if jikook are real and closeted isn't this exposing them?outing them just for a content lol it doesn't work that way.this is putting them at risk given they are in a homophobic country? or maybe the company wants to push this narrative of jikook as a couple?.also have mentioned about them spotted many times hanging out but we never see any other member hanging out off schedule just recently I saw jihope watching soccer. And its very rare.feel the company is pushing this fanservice even in their private lives.they want people to believe jikook are a thing.

Excuse me, you prefer Jimin with who??? 👀

If it's V or Suga or Namjoon I understand but anyone else and I'll snort😆

And I agree. Jimin is ship compatible with every one including himself. Yes. If he were a twin I'd ship him with his twin too and I'm not ashamed of that.

If you can't picture them making out I can and it's hot

Honestly I don't know if I should be flattered or mad or both or neither at this Ask so I'm just gonna be as respectful as I can be.

I haven't watched the run episode. I've only seen snippets but I will watch it this weekend. I have a ton of analysis to do and I hate commenting on stuff I haven't consumed.

This is not the first time Suga has said something of that nature. He's been alleged to have said "You weren't even a couple then" during Festa when Jikook shared the rain story.

Jin has made similar statements as have Namjoon and the others. When it comes to Jikook that is. He'll jikook have called themselves a couple too.

Since I don't speak their language and can't understand the nuances of it myself, I refrain from depending on any linguistic analysis for validation. I just take notice of it and carry on with my life.

Karmy can be a bit prudish and wow at everything because it's bold and daring and so out of the norm and gosh did you hear that? that's so gay, and sensationalise almost everything because they are so shocked easily by the prospect of two men "acting gay" when gay is so such taboo in their culture.

They are like me when I stare at a vagina that isn't my own.

I've said this over and over, but perhaps the company gravitate towards Jikook not only because what they have is authentic but because it's the best content they have💀

Best in terms of content production, engagement with fans, conversion of that engagement into monetary value, their chemistry is great, they self produce or come up with independently thought of and creative spontaneous moments that the best of hybe CCs couldn't conceive if they tried.

Which is strange because Vmin have awesome chemistry too and frankly I'm trynna see it. Jimin is a whole other mellow character around Taehyung sometimes. He steps back and let Tae take it away. Whereas around Jungkook most times, he gets so animated and hyper you'd think he swallowed a dynamite.

Not sure how much of his hyper activity is triggered by a subconscious awareness of Jungkook's proclivity towards introversion on screen. Whereas with V I feel he's more trusting of his co-workers ability to engage the audience on his own and come up with exciting and unique ideas for them to engage in without him necessarily worrying about censorship and worrying Tae's nerves will cause him to slip or make mistakes.

With Jungkook he gets lost trying to loosen him up and get him to relax on screen and not be soo aware of the cameras, or not read too much into anything he does while also trying to rile him up to get a reaction out of him because he's often fascinated by Jk's visceral response and reaction to him. He acts like there's no camera around, JK it's into it but soon forgets that millions of people are watching and so Jimin has to be on high alert around him. They give me headaches but I'm toxic so I love it. Bring it on Jikook.

Anywho, that was old Vmin. And old Jikook. These days Jungkook is the one that tries to loosen JM up.

And these days VMin can't play or keep it going for more than 5minutes without boring us to death with whatever weird vibes and inside jokes they have going on between them.

Case in point

Exhibit B

Don't get me wrong, they have impeccable chemistry and are also very good friends but let them be alone for an hour and you start blinking blankly at the screen- like you know there's something they not telling us and they matured and they all acting like grown ups with so much self respect and admiration for eachother.

Like when Tae confessed he liked Jimin alot I didn't expect Jimin's reaction at all, certainly not Suga cringing cos if those two are besties and face time eachother everyday I love you should be something they both should be used to hearing from eachother by now and their friends should be used to their shenanigans too by now.

Besides Taehyung confesses his love for Jimin more than he breathes oxygen in the air and this is Bangtan raised to the power Kpop- gay isn't exactly new to them if you know what I mean.

Yet no one said well that's so something a couple will do for that VMin moment. They cringed harder than a ma cracks his knuckles. Like friends would if another friend started acting homo around the bro table. There's a scene from Boys over flowers where Lee Minho goes to kiss another one of their friends- note to self, gurl, you have to rewatch those dramas you loved it. We loved it. Cool? Cool.

That moment with vmin and Suga reminds me each time of that scene from the drama.

Where's if actual couples did it, the reaction would be one of just pure awkwardness because no one knows how to react around couples. You can't stare at them on the bus when they kiss cos you feel you are the creep creeping up on private moments. It's just awkward and you don't know what to do with yourself.

Then if they are your friends you try to play it up by teasing them, mimicking them, hooting at them

Or you just exchange awkward glances and smirk

And to put things into perspective, Namjin cringing and bursting out a romantic soundtrack over Jikook's rain fight narration was warranted.

It was the first time they were hearing this from them and their reaction was as anyone would- yet Suga didn't find that cringing AT ALL like he had found VMins moment to be- just a smirk like it's just ridiculous with those two. See how similar Jin had reacted to their hickey story too?

Hobi forgets to react at all sometimes💀

He just smiles warmly and stares or laugh his brains out. Except for that one time Jungkook let it slip he wanted to be handcuffed by Jimin🥺

And why was it necessary for Tae to say that? Why was it necessary for Tae to make that confession? And why did the members intuitively assume JM was going to choose Jungkook for that? Namjoon went with V but only because he voided his gut instincts and used his head. We've all been there.

Jimin have said Tae has matured so much and we only see glimpses of Old Tae but he's different. Of course that's gonna impact the way they interact on screen.

They keep saying that's something a couple will do because THAT'S SOMETHING A COUPLE WILL REALLY DO.

There's no beating around the bush about it.

The ironical friends sharing a couch or they look exceptionally close today does not explain why they sneak into each other's hotel rooms or why cameras were placed in their rooms without their notice and Jikook had to walk in blindsided.

Jimins reaction was priceless.

You frankly don't need to see or hear them going out to restaurants to know something's up with those two. You don't.

Anyone who claims otherwise is just in denial.

Personally, if a Korean were to ask me about Jikook I'd say to them they are friends fuck off. If an Iarmy were to ask I'll say they are more than that. I see them for what they are and I celebrate them, I appreciate them, I love them and I support them. But I will protect them against anyone that posed a threat to their safety their well-being and their essence.

It's just the gay way.

And I feel this is often the conundrum people are faced with when it comes to Jikook. On one hand, they want to be celebrated- who wouldn't -but on the other hand their safety careers and lives could be as stake and they would want to protect that too.

And the best way to do that, if I were a company, would be to hide them in plain sight. Which is what everyone and their momma does with Jikook.

Jikook have not always been the creme de la creme of ships and hybe have not always used them as their go to fanservice ship. Granted fanservice is part of Kpop.

The Busan Brothers have split. The sun and moon duo blah- jikook don't nearly get marketed as a couple as much as other ships in bts to be frank. Editors have called Tae Kook romantic or a couple with chest in content, Sope get called couples almost everyday, they deliberately put members together to promote stuff because THEY ARE ALL THERE TO WORK.

This is somebody's business. They invest real money Into all of this. If ships were hurting their business and hard earned or borrowed money, they would dead that shit two dinosaurs ago. The fact they ain't said nothing means it's serving them. We are the puppets and they are the puppeteers.

They pull the strings and we go. Not the other way round.

As to whether they are doing this at the expense of Jikook, Jikook would be the best determiners of that. They have agency and in the past where they were "too young" to comprehend the consequences of their actions they had their hyungs to look at for them- hence all those tensions and allegations of members breathing down their necks.

Bighit was acting like Kris Jenner, encouraging them to strip and gyrate metaphorically for the cameras while they smiled all the way to the bank to cash out.

But it's 2022, a year where BTS have gone up against the government of Korea itsself and decided by themselves to call off any postponement to their military service and serve.

This is the same year you want to peddle the Hybe making Jikook do fanservice in their PRIVATE LIVES???

Girl BYE. Can't take you seriously.

I won't lie you lost me there.

WERE YOU IN THE FANDOM WHEN THEY ISSUED A STATEMENT TO THE EFFECT JUNGKOOK'S PERSONAL MATTERS IS NONE OF THEIR BUSINESS DURING HIS ITAEWON SCANDAL??

What they do off schedule really is none of our business or company's. Just as you get to go off work and your boss don't follow you home. It's reasonable to assume same for these boys.

YOU DIDN'T SEE HOW THEY SAID JACK SHIT ABOUT TAE JENNIE RUMORS?

There's been so much history and so much growth and the boys have accumulated enough socioeconomic capital to be reduced to such nonsensical levels of ridicule and bad takes.

And I'm sorry but what do you mean Jungkook should back off Jimin sometimes??

THE ANSWER IS A GRAND NO.

Read my lips, NEEEEEEUUUUUUUU

They are two legal adults half way through and almost 30, who determine whom to give their time and energy to and they choose to do that with each other- Oh look, I found something. Respect. Have some. For them.

Jimin has been spending his time with various persons both in a professional capacity and non professional capacity and we should be grateful that he is a functioning human being capable of functioning outside his group dynamic.

Going solo is pretty scary and they are all transitioning well and adjusting well to it. That's all that matters. Let's be glad that in spite of their personal projects that they make time to connect with their members and keep the spirit of BTS alive.

Real heartache is them finding BTS outside BTS and forgetting how precious their friend group once was.

But I get where you are coming from. rather than try to manifest Jungkook out of the picture, try manifesting your fave into the picture and go nag them until they call him up m- don't worry I'll put them through when the call comes. Wink.

Jimin is an extrovert and honestly he is well adjusted. I don't think he needs much help connecting with ppl.

My good sis, let's just enjoy the breadcrumbs while we can, before Jikook officially ties the knot🤧

Once they do it's game over for you and I and all the jm side ships on the black ship market🥺

I wouldn't say the company want ppl to believe Jikook are a thing. They only want you to believe they aren't a big deal. It's called normalization. The oldest trick in the books.

I'm high on pain meds.

I made sense some where I hope. Deadass💀

[wanou-dorm]

DAC- Trois

Name : Trois Vineyard ,it's just Trois 

Name origin: Trois is Three in French goes with his Brothers.trend of Names being  Number and matches the Number of the Character

Twisted from: Sanji Vinsmoke 

Age: he's at least 19 old enough  to Smoke he's Lied about his age trying away from his family 

Species : Genetically Modified Human, Monsterborn

Sexuality: Pansexual 

Birthday : March 3rd

Hair color: Blonde with Orange Highlights, Blonde with Black highlights naturally 

Eye color: Blue 

Build: ,slim, Muscular,Androgynous, about 180cm( 5’11), often mistaken for a very handsome Girl 

————

Dorm:  Nakakumi @fumikomiyasaki

School year: 2nd 

Class: 2-D

Best Class : Hand to Hand Combat

Worst Class: poisons and Potions - he can make potions Exceptionally well, but Poisons are against his Morals 

Favorite Food :Stuff that Pairs well with Black tea, Seafood, Mellorine 

Least Favorite Food: Konjac 

Likes: Cooking, Hot People , Zariah( despite the Fact They yell and Fight Constantly) 

Dislikes:Foods with No Nutritional value, People Tampering  with his Food ( Make your Own!! And don't Wreck mine!), being mistaken for a Woman , his Real Family except for Zero , Erina at Times ,I'm so sorry Twst!Zoro he Hated yo ass from conception , Being called a Pervert even though he is 

Unique Magic:

Skywalk

A Magical ability that basically allows him to “walk or Stand  on Air “ Allowing him to Travel long Distances that should be on impossible 

Personality and Background:

Trois on the Surface is a rather Cool headed individual  ,a Flirt with princely demanor that can Pull any Woman he Desire . 

Anyone from Deaths Academy of Combat  will say  that Trois is a walking Doormat and Would let anyone he Finds Hot walk all over him and also kinda mean to people he Dosent find Attractive and a Massive  pervert.

But Nakakumi  knows that Trois is more Complicated,

Trois is an individual who doesn't Share much of his past knowing how Nakakumi would react to finding out that he's a Genetically modified Human with Monster Blood DNA , who Escaped a Life of Experimentation from a Moving Military state with Twst!M.Bison for A stepmother. And that's not even the worst of his backstory, he was a man who was Punished for being Human and Having humanity.

Therefore, Trois Pushes himself away from others so that people don't know or Care about him.Trois dose Care for people  enough that in his First year of being in the Dorm as he Saw how meh the Kitchens Food took Charge and made Delicious meal after Having Gordon Ramsay level fit about the food in dorm having no Nutritional value, no taste and having a horrible Texture.

Trivia:

Trois Escaped with the Help of Zariah (Zeff) a young Soldier at the Time Who Didn't like His Stepmom she saw the Young boy Suffering and Basically committed An Act of Treason in the Moving Military State. She's now a Chef and Thier Restaurant is popular Enough that She and Trois are Concerned 

Trois in Recent Years Has not been Since at all in RSA, Because his brothers are In Incremina ..I'm sorry Barry and Francine , that you have to Deal with Genetically modified Super Sentai bullies except Cero Atleast you can hide behind Acer.

He once made a sweet  Pudding out of Oysters and told nobody until Erina asked .They still have no Idea How he made oysters into a delicious Sweet Pudding .

Sanji would have A Heart attack Seeing Trois  fighting  Women . Trois’s Legs are Rated E for Everyone Sanji his Stepmother Experimented on him .

Trois said his Stepmother was going to use him as a Vessel to basically erase his Personality .

Trois 's Sense of Pain is Dulled due the Experiments.

Due to technically began a monster blood he has a Monster form.

his Hair highlights are actually Black he dyes it Orange cause he hates how dull They make his Hair look .

Voice Claim:CY YU

Theme song:

--------

Picrews I',ve found and Remembered so far

Gacha Life 2

Tsui's Picrews

[atheostic]

I'm interested to hear how educated you are on the differences between judaism and christianity, especially how their value systems, i saw your conversation with rose and it was nice to see someone questioning theism without being condescending and acting like theists are bad people

Hey, sorry for taking a while to respond.

I'll readily admit that I'm way more familiar with how atheist Jews view the differences between the two religions than I am with how theist Jews view it. I consciously seek out atheist Jews' interpretations and views of Judaism and Judaism vs, Christianity partly because, as an atheist myself, I want to hear what other atheists have to say. The other part is that I find that atheists in general don’t have hangups about calling out the bad stuff in their past culture/religion so you get to actually hear about the problems (which every religion without exception has – just like they all have good parts too).

I know that Christianity started out as a denomination of Judaism (there were heated discussions in the early days of Christianity over whether one had to convert to Judaism before being considered a Christian). I know that if Bible!Jesus is an accurate portrayal of a real historical figure he didn’t intend to create a new religion but rather to reform Judaism. That being said, I also know that, much like how language dialects eventually become distinct enough to be separate languages, it has been a VERY long time since Christianity was part of Judaism. It has some aspects that are similar, but for the most part it’s now its own thing (kind of like how all Great Apes share similarities but are clearly different species).

I know (thanks to Karyn Glasser) that the main similarity between Christianity and Judaism is that the Old Testament and the Torah are mostly the same text when compared side by side, with the biggest difference being how some stuff is organized. That being said, in theology you’re supposed to treat each religion’s text as unique even if they’re literally word-for-word identical, which is why I always explicitly refer to the two texts as being separate.

I know that, while part of their holy texts are virtually identical, how Christianity vs Judaism approaches their holy texts is very very different. Traditionally in Judaism, the Torah is meant to be a living text, which means that things being open to interpretation was a feature, not a bug. As far as ancient Israelites were concerned, if there was no new meaning to be found in the text then the text was dead and useless. Christianity, on the other hand, likes to view their holy text as a lot more cemented (“my way or the highway” if you will)... though it doesn’t keep people from interpreting it six ways from Sunday anyway. The inflexibility in Christianity is likely part of why violence and animosity between denominations seems to be much higher than in Judaism.

I also know that how most Jews view God is very different from how most Christians view God; Jews aren’t typically afraid to be like “Yeah, that thing he did was an asshole move, God’s a dick sometimes” whereas most Christians consider God to be all-good and perfect and above reproach, so to say he did something bad breaks their brain. I remember seeing this post once where a Jewish person was basically like “whether good or bad, since everything happens according to God’s will I hold him responsible for what happens in my life”. Jews also don’t typically have a hangup about arguing with god (which makes for a much healthier dynamic in my opinion).

From my personal experience, it seems that Jews tend to be a lot more relaxed and have a more playful attitude toward religion that white North American* Christians. Jews, for example, will get into fun friendly debates over whether it’d be kosher for a vampire to drink pig’s blood if it was to avoid drinking from a human (if memory serves about that post someone asked their rabbi and they said yes) or whether it’d be okay for a dragon to light the shammash using their breath. North American Christians, on the other hand, tend to be way more serious when it comes to how they approach theology in general.

That being said, of course there are exceptions in both cases, as no group is monolithic and people are hella complicated. From what I’ve read and from what I’ve heard from Jews on Tumblr, Orthodox Jews tend to be more Christian-y in how they approach the Torah in that compared to other denominations they tend to take things a lot more literally. I remember reading an article once about how some bigwig in the Canadian Orthodox Jewish community had suggested not taking Genesis too literally and it was a big scandal.

And because no group is monolithic, it’s worth emphacizing that what I know about Jewish culture is primarily from a North American viewpoint (and mostly American at that), and therefore what I know isn’t applicable to all Jews as a whole (I recently got s book for the school library I work at all about how Passover is celebrated differently around the world, so it’d be silly for me to think that how Jews approach Judaism would be monolithic).

And all this is, of course, when talking about theist Jews. Because since Judaism is an ethnoreligion it’s possible to be both an atheist and a Jew at the same time. And how atheist Jews approach Judaism as a religion varies wildly (not surprising, since getting atheists of any kind to agree on anything beyond the nonbelief in any deities is like herding cats). Some, like the previously-mentioned Karyn Glasser, sometimes go to worship services as a way to connect with their culture and ancestors. One of my colleagues sometimes goes to the synagogue if there’s a party going on because “who doesn’t love a good party?”. Others, like an Israeli  caller to the Atheist Experience a while ago, think that atheist Jews should be referred to by a different word than theist Jews because their perspective regarding the religion is so different (his suggestion was for atheist Jews to be known as “Hebrews”). Others don’t care about the religion aspect at all but still celebrate the holidays as a tie to their culture. Yet others aren’t tied to their culture or religion at all. 

* No topic is taboo about being made fun of in Brazilian culture, so how Brazilian Christians approach religion is very different and much closer to how I’ve seen Jews approach religion.

[sapphyreopal5]

I don't mean to be rude but why does it matter so much that j3 have matching tattoos??

Hmmm another Anon who didn't read closely I see, nor do you read my other posts clearly. I made this post more or less because I wanted to make a point that it isn't a J2 thing. Also that what we see with them being all brotherly love and SPN family and such is just smoke and mirrors. I know people don't agree with me on a lot of stuff regarding J2. Heck, someone got uptight with me this morning when I talked about Jared being the third wheel stuff when it comes to JDM and Jensen, but these are just observations and facts. This isn't me being anti Jared, or anti Jensen, or even anti Jeff. I'm just someone who sees past the smoke and mirrors. I'm also tired of the idiots who say "OH HOW CUTE, THEY GOT MATCHING TATTOOS, THEY'RE LIKE BROTHERS!" without reading or hearing the actual story or getting to know the actual context. For anyone who is interested in what Anon is talking about, this is the post that went live last night on Mother's Day, 5/12/2024 at 6:45pm EST.

Also, since you're probably not real familiar with my blog, I consider this a bit more of an e-journal with my spiritual experiences, divination, interpretation of things, etc. and how they tie to things relevant to my interests and such than anything else at this point that I happen to interact with people on sometimes. If someone likes my stuff or comments on it or sends me asks about it, great! It makes this a whole lot more fun for me and them too (and it helps people understand their own experiences more). But if not, meh... this stuff is more for me and perhaps anyone else who happens to be interested. I'm not here to become super popular unlike what some have said of me in the past. To each their own I say.

I've been finding that my feeling compelled to make certain posts at certain times has been because of manifestations that are about to come. Timing is everything they say, right? In the case of the post you're talking about, merely a few min after I hit "post", I walked out of the car (as I was being driven to a restaurant for mother's day dinner) and did see someone with Down Syndrome. Also, it happened to be my son's birthday yesterday at the same time. He and one other person at the restaurant had a birthday today. Of course, the neon sign the staff at the restaurant held while singing to my son AND the other person has a crown on it.

Also, the table I was seated at was C12. If we wanted to throw in the numerical value of C as far as the alphabet goes, this could be read as 312, or 3 and 12 ('cause 3 kings and 1+2=3 in numerology). As an added bonus, the server's name was Justin. I said in multiple posts how I believe 11 is a bad luck number for Jensen... but suggested 12 maybe a good luck number for him in this post here with respect to Justin and Jensen on Tracker (new J2 in the making?). I talked about the number 12 being good for Jensen with respect to him joining Justin Hartley's show Tracker as Russell Shaw, Colter's brother he was estranged from for 20 years. Funny how timing of things work out, isn't it?

As I'm getting close to posting this on 5/13/2024 at 3:48pm EST, my best friend told me at 3:41pm EST the following: "Omg girl I just saw a sticker on a car that shows stick figures of the family with the names? The parents names? Justin and Jenny" and my personal favorite which was literally JUST as I was typing about 312 being the numerical value of C12 the number number I was seated at in the last paragraph above... "SHUT THE FUCK UP WE HAVE 312 MILES TO GO I AM FREAKING OUT!!!!"

Because I also blog about numerology and with the possible ulterior motive on my part to deter other Anons who come at me with borderline rude asks without reading more closely, I'm gonna talk about the numerology of 312 below. This info is from Astrology.com.

Numerology Meaning of Angel Number 312 Angel Number 312 is a combination of the energies and vibrations of Number 3, Number 1, and Number 2. Number 3 relates to optimism, creativity, self-expression, and communication. Number 1 represents new beginnings, independence, leadership, and motivation. Number 2 resonates with balance, harmony, partnerships, and relationships. When these numbers are combined, Angel Number 312 signifies that you need to stay positive and trust your instincts as you embrace new beginnings and take charge of your life. Communication and relationships are also important, so keep your lines of communication open. Meaning of Seeing Angel Number 312 Seeing Angel Number 312 is a message from the angels to help you stay true to yourself and your vision. It may also indicate that positive changes are on the horizon, and you should trust the universe to guide you in the right direction. The angels may also be reminding you to pay attention to your relationships, and to trust your intuition if something doesn't feel quite right. Additionally, seeing Angel Number 312 may also be a sign to focus on your career and financial goals with a clear mind and positive attitude. Love and Relationships Meaning of Angel Number 312 Angel Number 312 may indicate that changes are coming in your love life. Whether you're single or in a relationship, trust that the universe has a plan for your romantic life. If you're in a relationship, this number sequence is a reminder to communicate openly and honestly with your partner while maintaining balance and harmony in the relationship. If you're single, seeing Angel Number 312 may be a sign that new beginnings and positive changes are on the horizon in terms of your love life. Trust that the universe is guiding you towards the perfect partner. Money and Career Meaning of Angel Number 312 Angel Number 312 is a positive sign when it comes to your money and career. It indicates that new opportunities and success are on the horizon, so stay positive and trust the universe to lead you towards financial abundance. This number may also indicate that you need to communicate effectively in your work life. Trust your instincts, stay motivated, and take charge of your career path to achieve success and fulfilment. Summary of Angel Number 312 In summary, Angel Number 312 is a powerful message from the angels and universe that signifies new beginnings, communication, partnerships, and trust in the divine plan. Trust your instincts, stay positive, and focus on your intentions to attract abundance in all areas of your life.

[real-chinq-tmblr]

I know that what he did was wrong....but I can't help but see a child rather than some "scary unhinged monster" he is usually painted to be. Or a joke. A meme. Didn't win the race and allat.

When I first heard his music and then saw that he immediately went to jail, I felt strange. I could hear the talent in his delivery and had he been given the right guidance and resources, he would've gone on to create something great.

But you know, I wonder if he would've wanted to do that, even if he was free. I sometimes notice that people who have lived that life have no interest in arts, just what is infront of them, what is reality to them. Does it make money? Does it prevent them from being in danger? That type of stuff.

Because it seems like the arts is like....a fairy tale to them? Kinda like how poverty is a fairy tale to upper middle class/upper class people?

I know that the victims of his actions suffered real pain. I don't deny that at all and I don't mean to trivialise it. Sure, he should pay for his crimes. But I genuinely feel like...he's not the problem, he's a symptom of it. I mean, he's 15. The thing is, he should've never been holding a gun or living that sort of lifestyle in the first place. So how did he end up in that position?

And it's so messed up that we glamourise this type of stuff. We like it. We encourage it. We want to see young children holding guns, following the footsteps of their older counterparts, "carrying the mantle". What mantle? Violence? Ignorance? Like I'm sorry but that's what it really is. It's like people joining the military for legacy reasons. Except it's on the streets, it's "colored", it's "poor", and therefore it's illegal.

My grandpa and my dad was like that. Not that they lived that lifestyle but they were surrounded by people that did, and whether they realise it or not they internalised similar values and passed them down. I had to do a lot of inner work to undo it and I still haven't managed to undo everything. I can't imagine myself having a child because I'm scared I'll pass something down to them myself. Because I'm not gonna lie, I can't disagree when I say that violence and ignorance has a lot of appeal. I mean, a lot. And in some circumstances it's scary to be otherwise, to not be aggressive, to not be angry. Because it could mean you're vulnerable, and vulnerability is incredibly scary depending on the context. (Because there are environments that encourages and actively requires some form of "vulnerability", or at the very least a feigning of it, or else you're a "threat" and a "delinquent".)

But at the end of the day, at least what I personally realised was that, we just all want to be seen and treated as human. That's all. Violence is just a means to it. Just like feigning vulnerability or politeness.

And it's funny cause what happened to Tay-K in the end as he strived to uphold those things (that at this point, could be considered "tradition", because I define "tradition" as "peer pressure from your ancestors/predecessors")? Incarcerated for 55 years and won't be eligible for parole until 2047, especially since his "friends" took a plea deal and threw him under the bus while he kept his mouth shut, and he also became a bit of a joke/meme. Or sometimes people just think it's a cool thing to say "free Tay-K!" but really, it's just a trendy motto moreso than anything said with sincerety.

It reminds me of a quote from Sanyika "Monster" Shakur, who said in an interview how people that "shine the brightest" end up incarcerated forever or dead so "what you really want is a nice little glow".

And think about the song he blew up from. "The Race"? He made that song/video while actively trying to dodge arrest and then the video went up on the day he was captured. It blew up because of the hashtag #FREETAYK and debuted at #70 on the Billboards. Then a whole bunch of other musicians, with nothing to do with his lifestyle or his experiences, remixed his song and capitalized off of his hype. The hype from his arrest and "authenticity" of the "gang lifestyle" behind the song or whatever the fuck. Like....is it just me? Do none of ya'll think there's something sick about this?

(But that seems to be a running theme for musicians/cultural icons anyways, especially the ones that had any sort of message. Like Bob Marley or Tupac, they're just icons to put on shirts or whatever with quotes, to sell merchandise and to "act cool" with.)

I tried to choose photos where Tay-K wasn't holding a gun or trying to uphold some image. Because I think he's human and that's how he should be seen. (I know he's doing "American Sign Language" with his hands but lets be honest, who wasn't this ignorant as a child? I have a few photos looking this stupid myself. I know, I'm such an adorable farty potato fairy today but I had my moments.)

I don't know. The older I get, the more minstrelsy and anti-human the whole "culture" feels. Well, not necessarily the "culture", but rather the people perpetuating whatever ideas they have of it whether it is that they "sell" or "buy" the "product".

Here's a few joints from Tay-K that I like:

[bunnyhysteria]

so i finally read the extra I see a lot of ppl mad pressed about and go "this is why shen qingqiu is absolutely an abuse victim and binghe raped him!!"

throwin away the main story sex which is it's own can of worms and argument, it's not the one where he literally drugs him, no it's... shizun said be gentler and then just binghe didn't. that's what constitutes rape in fiction now??? honestly it's dubcon if you want to slap a problematic label on it. and I'm not sayin bingqiu isnt toxic, definitely not at a healthy point even when the story ends but. I just feel like people are graspin for straws to paint binghe as big bad evil man because shouldn't he know our very explicit means of consent in modern culture?! I'm not as caring on the antis who take their stance on shen qingqiu's nonsense because usually they make far more sense because the thing that gets me is I literally saw an exchange like "man I love it up until that point but I don't wanna throw it all away for one extra" and I'm just like. that's your tipping point? buddy it's literally just the same shit you were fed the whole time. I don't get it. why is everything else okay, but this isn't? throw the whole bag away or don't; don't eat half of it enjoying it then eat some more suddenly declaring you hate it.

but the real thing is that their dynamic strongly comes off as "if dear shizun actually wanted it to stop, it would stop". he's whiny and annoyed at best in the extra. he's not even really fightin back. "oh but the outside pressures and binghe always guilt trips him-" no, we are explicitly shown in another extra that shen qingqiu can turn him away, even if he starts wailing, even if it's sex. and you would think if he hates sex so badly with binghe, why would he in another extra again purposely initiate and say that he would gladly endure it??

as for the blood ppl are pressed about, yea it's kind of gross, but also injuries are basically nothing in this world. they're like a paper cut that just stings really badly and then heals within a day or even hour. people spew countless liters of blood and they're still around kicking next scene. in our world would anal bleeding be a very big problem? yes, yes it would. is it a problem for an immortal who can ask his friends to hit him up with spiritual juice and heal instantly? no, not at all. and I only ever recall blood twice, that being the main story scene and the wedding extra. I genuinely think the blood in this case is nothing to do with the actual story and just narrative device to play on the wedding night fetish.

and just... not only is shen qingqiu an unreliable narrator with severely tsundere tendencies, this is ultimately sung in a comedic tune. none of it is face value nor is all of it supposed to be a serious part of the story. not only is this me going "chill" but I also believe this is part of the reason why people feel justified in trying to pretzel shizun into a rape victim. because shen qingqiu is never actually giving the full picture on what's actually going on or even his on true feelings, we're left to guess to fill some parts in, and so with their own growing discomfort of the yandere binghe they signed up for, they latch onto the smallest bit of shen qingqiu rejecting him. they're obsessed specifically with the wedding extra because it's where it ends. forget how the previous shit is arguably far worse, this is where it ends. and it's not their picture perfect healthy relationship. and it bothers them so badly that they still like bingqiu. so they proclaim themselves critical, write a few essays on how it's so awful to distance themselves from the nasty bingqiu enjoyers who openly like problematic stuff and wouldn't actually care if it was rape, and then circle back around to enjoying it because they've done their moral obligation so they're now enjoying the ship in a pure and holy way.

and maybe I have a personal bone to pick because I see me and my hubby in bingqiu so much, including how everyone wants to paint him as an evil abuser despite never even meeting the man, just because we have a colourful past I'm not ashamed of. how because I'm a small and weak feminine person and because he's a large and strong masculine person. despite the fact I'm also upfront about the shit I did. like don't think heteronormativity and misogynistic ideals aren't playing a role in how binghe is always the abuser and shen qingqiu is always the victim. there's hardly ever any room for shen qingqiu is the abuser or how about they're both just two toxic clusterfucks made in heaven and hell for each other. and people just love to down play emotional control when it's shen qingqiu dishing it out, but as soon as it's binghe, the world is ending someone save shizun.

in my hot take, shen qingqiu has far more control over binghe than binghe could even dream of having over his shizun.

do I even wanna drag out the corpse of bl culture, misogyny towards women writing gay shit, or the general homophobia of how we hold gay shit to a way higher moral standard because it's already impure and immoral so there's no room for it to be down and dirty? and why are we pressed about this being our reason to throw out book 4 and not the literal slur printed on the page that was also written in the original. like the guy who says slurs is the one we're putting into the uwu baby box??? okay.