#he specifically wants him to do it because repressing that side of him is actively hurting him and he can't spend his life ignoring part of

[bitchthefuck1]

The fact that Jesper is like. a mid-tier fabrikator at best is actually so important to me.

So much of this story centers around the fact that these people are not chosen ones, that they have no sacred destiny or otherworldly power, but that they're children doing the best they can in a system that doesn't care about them, and all they have are their wits and each other. Jesper isn't an especially gifted grisha, and he has no formal training, but he takes that teaspoon of unremarkable talent and applies it to a skill he spent years perfecting to make something even greater and wholly his own. He isn't special because he was born that way, he's special because he made himself special.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

🦐 to recognize my post

Am I the asshole for asking my grandmother if I can move in with her?

This’ll be one of your classic reddit-style family dramas, I think. Back in late 2019 just before COVID, I (freshly 18 at the time) had run away from home with my mom and moved in with my best friend (R, 17 in 2019) and her (60s, deeply depressed) dad. Her dad and I were on good terms for a long time, but respectfully, he has a tendency to repress any issues he has with someone until they build into a bigger issue. Near toward November of 2020, he kicked me out on account of ‘not keeping a job and not doing anything around the house’ (I washed stagnant dishes often, took care of their several animals, and took out trash whenever I could, R and I think he was projecting his shitty roommates from when he was 20 onto me), so I needed a new place to move.

My own beloved father lives ten hours away, and offered for me to live with him. For months, I was preparing to pick up my entire life from the hometown I had lived in since I was 2 years old to move to a new state, and in the last month, I got cold feet and said I couldn’t make such a large change like that. My dad completely understood, and I went to look for a new place to stay, still living with R and her dad at this time.

During this period, I was getting closer with my grandmother on my mom’s side again. She was one of the few family members I felt comfortable with, and we often went to Panera for lunch dates to catch up on things. I won’t go super deep into why I’m so anxious about the rest of the family, because that would require an entire several page google document to explain (especially now that we’re actively banned from holidays).

It was around this time I asked my grandmother if I could move into one of her five or six spare rooms upstairs. My grandfather had died in the last couple of months, and I was confident that if she needed any help (she’s in her mid eighties) moving things upstairs or cleaning the house, I would be beyond glad to do it for her. She then hesitated and said it may be a better idea for me to move in with my dad after all (which was odd, because she hates my dad’s guts, as does the rest of my family), and I let it go after that. I didn’t push, I would just need to find a new place. 

Well, word got around, and she told my aunts and older cousins in passing. I don’t remember if I got sent anything in specific, but one of my aunts (mother’s older sister who I'm genuinely terrified of) absolutely fucking exploded on my (54 at the time) mom, giving her a several paragraph long shitstorm of a message saying she was a terrible mother for letting me take advantage of my grandmother, calling her horrible things, slurs, and insulting her wife, and it got back to me somehow. I was fucking shredded apart emotionally.

Since then, I have moved back in with my mother out of necessity and we have totally reconciled our relationship in the three or so years I’ve been home, and my entire mother’s side of the family- aside from my grandmother- has completely cut contact and don’t invite us to holidays anymore, for significantly more ridiculous reasons than me asking my grandmother what I did.

My mother’s side of the family ostracized her, myself, and my sister since my mother first married my dad 25ish years ago, and has just never treated her the same since, which explains some of the hostility (I want to specify, I’m confident that my mother did nothing outright wrong for this, my family is extremely far-right and EXTREMELY judgemental, and my mom bore unnecessary vitrol for everything she went through), but I need to know if I was actually the asshole for asking to move in with my grandmother, who even now still cares about me as family and lives alone. I could give less of a shit what my aunt thinks now (she lives an entire day’s drive away, in a different state as well), but I can’t help but shake the fear that I was actually taking advantage of her kindness or something of the sort. Was this a wrong thing to ask? Was this actually too much, and should I not have bothered?

What are these acronyms?

[that-ari-blogger]

Witch Side Are They On? (Young Blood, Old Souls)

Hero and villain are nebulous terms, the definitions of which can be taken to mean literally any character. Although, almost everyone knows one when they see one. It's a vibes based classification. Nobody is trying to argue that The Joker is a paragon hero (except some people), for example.

Certain characters break from the mould, with some protagonists displaying more morally challenged motivations or methods, some villains being redeemed, and some "morally grey" heroes ending up being written as power fantasies and you can usually tell when that happens.

I find the classification of characters rather redundant, as people have a habit of being complex. Sure, I have met people who fit stereotypes to a tea, but they are the exception not the rule, and the more you get to know someone, the less tropey they seem to you.

So, instead, I would like to examine the actions that The Owl House frames as evil, as well as the point at which the series decides a character is no longer redeemable.

Let me explain.

SPOILERS AHEAD: (The Owl House)

Because good and bad are subjective, and this is the internet, I am going to define heroic and villainous actions in this context as "behaviours that The Owl House presents as desirable and undesirable" respectively. Knowledge, expression and kindness are heroic in this context, and willful ignorance, cruelty, and repression are villainous. Ok?

These themes are really well emphasised by the light and dark motif going on. Luz's name literally means light, and she is very much associated with that concept through her magic.

Compare that to Belos, who has managed to spend the entirety of the series up to this point either in literal shadows or figurative ones. We haven't seen him outside in the daylight; we haven't even seen what he looks like yet. The man exists in darkness.

What I mean by this, is light reveals, shadows conceal. A light can bring hope, show you the way out, or let you glimpse the beauty of an artwork, if someone keeps you in darkness, your eyes will adjust eventually, but you won't be seeing the full thing.

Now, here's a question: what exactly is Lilith's motivation? The flashback gives her a history, and shows her actions and sacrifices, but it doesn't redeem her by any stretch of the imagination.

Lilith made a sacrifice for power. She has been chasing Eda because of Belos, and we will get to that. But the curse was her own misdeed, and I think its fascinating how the concept of willful ignorance plays into that.

"I thought it would just be for a day."

Now, I don't know what was on that scroll. Maybe it came with a sticky note that says, "guaranteed 24-hour magic removal or your money back". But, it takes some serious mental gymnastics to decide that the thing you wanted to do because you wanted to do it with someone was worth sacrificing that someone to achieve.

And when the curse turned Eda into the beast, it never occurred to Lilith to tell anyone. I think providing evidence of the magic that caused it might have helped to fix it, but Lilith kept it a secret.

Also, if you see a system that outcasts your closest family member and TURNS PEOPLE IT DOESN'T LIKE TO STONE, and you devote yourself to upholding that system "because of all the good it does", you are deliberately ignoring some major factors.

So, Lilith engages with the theme on two fronts, she keeps the world in the dark about her own actions, and she actively ignores things about the world she is in, and that is the key here. Lilith is presented as highly intelligent and rational, but someone the clever should surely notice some things that she very much doesn't. Which leads me to believe that she is either unintelligent and rational, or intelligent and irrational.

I don't think Lilith is a villain in the series, entirely. I think she is an antagonist, and thematically opposed to the heroes. But the motivation for the specific acts of antagonism are, fundamentally, altruistic. She wants to heal her sister. The problem is that being motivated by guilt and compassion doesn't square with the actions she has taken to get to this position. So naturally, she ignores the incongruities until she runs face first into them, and her redemption comes later through her actions and decisions to seek out and understand.

Belos plays an interesting role in this as well. I mentioned in my previous post that Belos manipulates her agency out from underneath her, and I stand by that here for two reasons. 1) Belos is the system she has bought into. He has directly and intentionally, through propaganda, convinced a world that wild magic is bad and that sacrifices must be made. 2) He found a woman who was conflicted about her actions and saw a way to get rid of the most powerful witch in the boiling isles.

So, Belos too features the theme of wilful ignorance, imposing it on the boiling isles, and making use of Lilith's blind spot to further his own goals.

I've mentioned Belos' restriction of expression in the past multiple times, but there is one more of the core themes that the emperor engages with, and I think the way in which he does that is rather funny. Belos is cruel, and it is constantly tripping him up.

So, what spur's Lilith's redemption? She gets shown her actions are wrong immediately after performing them, so it can't be realisation. So, what is it that prompts her to reconsider her life choices? What causes the leader of the coven heads to bail? Lilith backs out of the coven system because Belos is a jerk.

Belos could have kept the manipulation going. He could have said that he tried and failed to heal Eda's curse. He could have said that Eda attacked him and left him no choice. But instead, he decided to gloat.

"Ah, taking her to the healing ceremony?" "I will not be healing her." "But, you, promised me." "Don't be so naïve, Lilith."

This isn't even the only time the man's desire to gloat self-sabotages him in this episode. So, let's get to that fight scene.

"Okay, I'll play."

I feel the need to point out that Belos wins the fight part of this scene hands down. I recommend UnholyBasil's excellent video on this scene, but suffice to say, anyone with the power to instantly quadruple the animation budget for a moment is a terrifying threat, and Belos is definitely that.

Up until now, the emperor was just an ideological roadblock. The antagonist has been the coven system and the Emperor's Coven that want to restrict magic. Belos has simply been the guy at the head, the one Luz must symbolically defeat.

But now, Belos barely has to lift a finger, and Luz is on the back foot. She can't even touch him. And that is the key to why the ending of the fight is so cool. Belos is untouchable, emotionally and physically, so Luz does both. She puts a crack in his armour, not enough to defeat him, but enough to break the facade he has put up and make him look like an Undertale character.

Remember what I said about self-sabotage? Well, it happens again here. Here is someone who is trying to kill Belos, someone with magic that he has seen. And he decides to waltz up to her and present his face as a target, just because he wants to needle at her mind, the man would have succeeded had he been intelligent.

That is my takeaway from Belos. He is an eejit with delusions of grandeur. Don't get me wrong, the man is a decent manipulator, but his inability to look past himself and his need to be cruel repeatedly puts a dampener on his whole mastermind shtick.

Also, he didn't think to check for the obvious glyphs on the side of the suitcase he was given, he just assumed he had won and didn't feel the need to make sure. Are we sure this guy is clever and not just charismatic?

Now, I haven't talked about Luz or Eda much, and I think it's time to rectify that.

Lilith's character design is a mirror of her sister's. She is restricted in her dress, and perfectly symmetrical. Eda meanwhile is unkempt and wild, with the torn outfit making her look unbalanced and volatile.

The Clawthorn sisters also have a Red Oni, Blue Oni motif going on between them, a trope about characters with a duality to them that has shades of colour symbolism and mythology thrown in for spice.

According to TV Tropes:

"The Red Oni is associated with passion, wildness, and defiance. The red oni character is often more brawny than brainy, extroverted, enthusiastic, determined, and filled with a zest for life. They are also much more likely to break conventions and rules than their counterpart."

Meanwhile:

"The Blue Oni is associated with serenity, control, and observing authority. A Blue Oni is more intellectual, proud, traditional, introverted, and cultured."

I those two don't sum up Eda and Lilith respectively, I don't know what does. And if you have been paying attention, the colour symbolism there appears in the designs of the two. Lilith bears more cool colours, with the blueish hair, eyes, and gem, while Eda scraps all subtlety and just wears red and orange.

So, Eda and Lilith represent two ends of the spectrum, chaotic and lawful. But its notable that when Lilith gets redeemed, she doesn't lose the logical, heavily rationalised mindset, she loses the restrictions. She ends up being free to be whomever she wants, and that person doesn't have to be as overtly wild as her sister.

Luz and Belos, however, are extremely similar characters, with one Luz and Belos, however, are extremely similar characters, with one main difference. One is kind, one is cruel. In terms of character mechanics (how they approach problems), that is the main difference. The rest of their actions come as a result of this dichotomy. Both have a form of main character syndrome, for example, but where Luz wants an adventure and to save the world, Belos wants to remake the world in his own image.

I'm not saying they are identical, or that they are the same character, I am saying that they are similar except for the most fundamental of points, derived from this difference of kindness vs cruelty. All of the lessons that Luz learns but Belos ignores, come from selflessness, all the differences come from expanding out this over and over again until you get a hero and a megalomaniac.

They are both charisma-based artificers, but they have different alignments, and that has led to them making different choices, and leading different stories that have clashed with each other. They started in a similar place, but because of the one difference, their paths diverged wildly.

Final Thoughts

Belos is a villain who would be right at home with Wiley Coyote if he wasn't so terrifying and megalomaniacal, because he cannot stop bringing about his own downfall in spectacular fashion.

I wanted to find the Tolkien quote about evil destroying itself for this post, but instead I found something that sums up The Owl House really well.

"You have to understand the good in things, to detect the real evil."

Tolkien was a man who fought in both the first and second World Wars, including the battle of the Somme, and yet he was a profoundly optimistic man, as well as being a realist. His most famous work is about someone small accomplishing a great thing against all the odds because evil cannot comprehend the simple acts of kindness.

That, transformed by generations of nerds, has resulted in The Owl House, where a villain, by dint of being clad in gold, can only shine by reflecting the light of the protagonist. And he cannot comprehend the simple kindness of community, and harmony.

Light, do not faulter.

Next week, I am diving straight into the next season, with Separate Tides, and the introduction of the woobie, so stick around if that interests you.

Previous - Next

[hkpika07]

How do you think Gordon would show affection? Does he express it through physical touch or words?

YAY I GET TO TALK ABOUT HOW EMOTIONALLY REPRESSED GORDON IS AND THE SUBTLETIES OF HOW HE SHOWS LOVE

Okay Gordon is…. Not good at showing affection to say the least. It takes him years to even begin to soften up around his fellow engines and even when he does it’s very rare. But that’s not to say he doesn’t love and appreciate his friends far from it. Though he hides it under a million layers of coded jargon and fake anger/annoyance. (To which I’ve labeled Gordon Jargon) I honestly think if he tried to expression affection through words like a normal person he’d struggle to stutter out half a sentence then explode and crumble into dust.

I even drew a little comic about it. But I’m too lazy to grab the link since I’m answering this on mobile. So to summarize, Gordon will hide his worry/affection.care under a billion different layers that you have to decode. For example he might say to Edward. “You never shunt my coaches right, I’ll do it myself.” Is his was of saying “thanks for helping me up the hill again. I’ll shunt my coaches so you can take a break.” Or he might say “No no, big strong engines like myself don’t need the warm berth. We are perfectly fine without it. I’m far too strong to rely on such frivolities.” Is his way of saying “you take the warm berth, I heard you had a bad run in with the snow earlier, please take the warm berth so you can rest up.” And his most common phrase “You are such a stupid silly little engine what on earth were you thinking!?” Is his way of saying he was worried about you.

Gordon also probably shows a lot of emotion through micro-expressions because of that patented Gresly Emotional Repression™️

Another way of him showing affection is the amount of time it takes for him to apologize to you. His image is very important to him. He despises being wrong or being in the wrong. And will take a bit to apologize since he doesn’t want to admit it. Now he will always apologize since he learns from his mistakes and is a good person at heart but the amount of time it takes for him to apologize depends on the person and the situation. He will apologize to Edward and Henry the fastest, since not only does he realize he’s wrong he also doesn’t want to see them upset.

Gordon is not a physical touch person at all. I would say his love language is acts of service. He’ll do little things like shunt his own coaches, let others take the turntable first, let them go ahead of him for water, coal or go first at the steam works.

In ITAR specifically, he shows affection with his avatar as well. While he doesn’t do hugs or physical touch, the most he’ll do is give you an approving shoulder pat. Though he has made a couple of exceptions. He was pulled into a hug by Edward and Henry a few times (they always initiated the hug), he gave James an affectionate side hug at the end of the great race, he has hugged Spencer after the silver slick had a emotional breakdown, and the only time he ever initiated a hug was when he had his own emotional breakdown in front of Edward. But the most often way he’ll show affection with his avatar (and this is a sign you’ve earned his trust) is by giving you his jacket. If you’re cold, or sad and he cares about you, he will toss his jacket in your face or throw it around your shoulders. He’s probably the most affectionate with his kids. He will leave a small plate of coal and mug of water for his kids as well as give them some hair ruffling.

In ITAR one of the only times Gordon has actively shown great amounts of parental emotion is in Journey Beyond Sodor when James and Thomas get lost on the mainland. He has a panic attack because James is gone. If anything happened to any one of his kids he’d be a wreck. He worries by anxiously pacing back and forth for hours, hand over his mouth not saying a word.

[rimeiii]

WHB Prologue Speculations!

Now that I had the time to actually go through and watch the entire PV in its entirety properly (OP is sitting here with a cough, air quality in her country is so bad lately everyone is getting sick), the theorycrafting part of my brain is on overdrive mode so. I'm just going to ramble. And speculate. Mostly about Minhyeok. Because Minhyeok is amazing I love him holyshit.

Also I wanted to try out S3M3 Chongyue ASMR but he's still getting the final mastery level, so I let the brainworms win out. Maybe I did a little silly and did a character analysis regarding MC + Minhyeok and their potential trauma responses too, idk.

Without further ado...

(Spoilers for the prologue video, proceed with caution!)

1. MC and Minhyeok's trauma responses

I feel like the trauma regarding MC seeing their parents dead in front of them when they got home from school back when they were young is going to crop up eventually. Based on their reluctance to step foot in their house, it's likely they never worked through their trauma properly.

There is an active repression of memories here. The mind, deeming the memory dangerous and mind-breaking if it is to be remembered in its entirety, forcefully pushes it down from MC's conscious memory into their unconscious mind as a self-defense mechanism. Sure, they may not recall it now, but it lies in wait in their unconscious mind as it silently affects MC's behaviours and thought processes.

It will crop up eventually, I think. In what way, however, we may not know. Perhaps MC's reliance on Minhyeok is a subconscious decision to allow themself to be vulnerable and let someone take care of them. Perhaps MC now has a fear of loss, which manifests in their impulsive decision to make a deal with Satan to save Minhyeok, the only person they have left. The association between their house and their parents' deaths is still strong, which plays a part in them not wanting to stay there for long.

As an aside, the MC I'm making as my OCsona for this game is going HARD into this aspect specifically, might share her bio eventually on this blog. After I finish working on my Docsona bio that is aha-

And honestly, I do think he suffers from trauma from the incident, at least a little bit. Not to the extent of MC, whose mind repressed those memories to protect themself, but still a significant amount. He can still function in day-to-day life relatively well, and perhaps his tendency to care and protect MC is due to the fact he doesn't want to see her suffer/sad. MC already has a lot on their plate, no need for anything more.

Their attitudes towards each other can be interpreted to be a reflection of how their trauma affects them. MC acts more or less nonchalant about Minhyeok and his expressions of care at the beginning - it may be because they were watching adult videos when he talked to her, but at the same time it may be because they're already so used to having Minhyeok nag at her it became annoying. Or, they keep him at arm's length despite caring for him, because the trauma of losing their parents makes them hesitant to let him in.

And Minhyeok, who perhaps saw MC becoming distant as something worrying, took it upon himself to make sure they are taken care of. Because he loves them, cherishes them, and doesn't want to lose them to what he assumed was despair. Perhaps, he desperately wants MC to open up to him, and his love for MC makes him willing to wait however long it takes for them to do so. And until then, he'll remain loyal by their side.

As for who killed MC's parents, I'd like to think it's an angel. If MC is a descendant of Solomon, then it would make sense that one of their parents is also a descendant of Solomon, right? And the angels have been killing Solomon's descendants left and right - it's just that they've managed to frame these killings as accidents.

(I should make a oneshot for this.)

Which leads us to...

2. Who is the figure in front of MC in the flashback?

I'm pretty sure it's Minhyeok.

Ever heard of Chekhov's gun? It's basically a concept related to conservation of detail. Specifically, if a detail is mentioned in the storyline, then more often than not it has storyline relevance.

The figure who stepped in front of MC, the mention of a soapy smell intermingling with the scent of blood. And guess who's described to have a smell like soap?

That's right. Minhyeok.

Assuming the figure was Minhyeok, what was he doing that day? The most logical answer, assuming human Minhyeok, is that he was walking with MC back home from school to drop them off, when they came across that gruesome scene. Minhyeok's protective instincts kick in as he shields MC's eyes.

3. And about Minhyeok...

Minhyeok, who slides in front of MC to shield their eyes from the carnage that was their parents' death. Minhyeok, who continues to take care of MC after everything. Minhyeok, who cherishes MC so much from childhood, with a childhood promise of marriage.

Minhyeok, who dies protecting MC from harm, who seems to just know MC is in danger, who so readily sacrifices himself for the MC.

He may be MC's childhood friend, but as it stands, he as a character is still shrouded in mystery to us, the player. As many others have pointed out, his character archetype is MC's protector. He shields them from the trauma, protects her from harm, and takes care of her.

The fact he just stormed into his room to protect MC without hesitation. Was he warned of the danger MC is going to be in? How is his devotion to the MC so strong he's willing to risk his life for them? His love for MC is just that strong, is probably the main reason.

Or perhaps...he isn't completely human after all. Which sets up for angst potential, honestly. But that's speculation for another day.

4. About Minhyeok's story...

We see signs of his revival as Satan whisks MC to Hell, with how Minhyeok's body 'flinches' a little bit. So, it's safe to assume that MC's wish is granted immediately - as Satan had said. Demons don't lie, after all (but I imagine they can perform omissions of truth all the same, so don't trust everything a demon says).

As for what happens to him after the revival, the EN translation is a little bit finicky, but with my (VERY) limited CN/JP knowledge I assume that Minhyeok will wake up at the place right before he went back to his room, without any memory of what had transpired mere moments earlier. So, for all he knows, he was supposed to meet MC back at his room but finds them missing from his room. Assuming time flow on Earth and in Hell is the same, I'd imagine he'd start looking for them.

And that might be what the game meant by Minhyeok's story - what's going on back in the human world on his side specifically.

Without the memory of him protecting MC, it would be hard. I'd imagine the angels or demons getting into contact with him first, and promising to get him over to her. Which is how a Minhyeok romance would likely start...I don't know, though. Pure speculation on my part.

also satan's voice kinda reminds me of sesa from arknights help me

[calronhunt]

The new Raphael stuff is like, so like, basically it's just straight urban fantasy now, we're in modern day but there's magic and shit. Everyone has magic in side of them and it manifests in a specific way To Them. Manifestations of this magic can be similar but it's tied to an individual and changes as the person goes through life (this is mostly to not bog myself down with a super complex magic system).

However, magic can be corrupted in 2 ways, either from overuse (which is a temporary corruption. you just gotta chill out with using it) and from trauma and stress. The trauma and stress one is more permanent and at a certain point that corruption can be permanent and entirely change how your body reacts to using magic and how it manifests. Corrupted magic often mirrors the trauma in some way, even if it's the smallest bit.

Raphael's fucked up, he's my fucked up little boy, and his magic has been completely corrupted. Raphael's is like this. if he's calm and tries really hard he can still summon his magic in it's original form (small blue flames) but it often just manifests now as blue skin patches and eyes forming on his body. The beast/cat form that I've drawn him in now is like what happens if he overuses/gets too distressed. He's still conscious when he's in that form, but it's basically like, when he's having a meltdown that's what happens so his impulse control is completely gone and he's a lot more dangerous. There's like, magic suppressant things that he can take, but he obviously doesn't like to do that lol.

On the flip side, Lionel's magic is also completely corrupted, but he's apart of this religion that believes corruption means a moral failing on the person and has a spell to lock away someone's magic completely if it comes to that. Lionel was forced to get this spell done on him by the way. But magic is a big part of everyone so it's inherently repressive and constrictive and has caused Lionel to repress large parts of himself too. He's not even able to really process the trauma that got his magic to get to that point because he's not able to touch it anymore.

The story still starts as Lionel and Raphael sex romance, but I do think a big part of the story now is Raphael wondering if he wants to get this spell to repress this part of his body that seems to actively hate him and cause more harm. And working through his feelings on that with Lionel who has done that and isn't exactly happy with it.

and also Raphael's dad Sigthy is maybe a cult leader now because I can't write a story without a cult like it's physically impossible for me.

[demadogs]

Why do you think will/Byler seems to get more active, targeted hate/homophobia than Robin/Rockie (or ronance)?

theres a lot of reasons.

robin became an established queer character the season she was introduced, and she was never in a hetero relationship before. for byler, mike specifically, its different because they hate the idea of a character they love “suddenly” being revealed as queer. because they refuse to look into all the queercoding, all theyve ever known is mike as a straight character in a relationship with a girl so they would be pissed if they found out theyve actually been rooting for a queer character.

robin and vickie also arent main characters. they see them as the shows representation points and thats the only purpose they serve. mike, will, and el however are the main characters and we so so rarely see main characters in media thats not explicitly a queer story end up being queer. this just doesnt happen. and if it does happen, their sexuality and feelings are revealed in the first season, second at the latest. never the last. and they also never leave a long term hetero relationship for it. again, this goes for shows that ARENT considered a queer show. maybe youd see this in heartstopper but a scifi horror show about an evil alternate dimension??? this is so rare.

because of that, they think we’re absolutely ridiculous for believing it will happen. i think the aggression and homophobia also has to do with them subconsciously seeing the signs that we’re pointing out and theyre getting mad that mlvn isnt the perfect couple they say they are. and/or theyre seeing the massive numbers of byler shippers compared to mlvn shippers and thats enough to piss them off and worry them that mlvn isnt endgame.

the biggest thing i think tho is mike. they chose to show mike deeply struggle with internalized homophobia and people dont like that. they see him with a girl and think “SEE!!!! HE’S STRAIGHT!!” even tho their relationship is obviously unhappy for both of them. a lot of times internalized homophobia is represented with the audience aware of their true feelings. this is one of the first times ive seen it played out where we’re given clues, but not seeing mikes pov at all. they wont like that. they’ll feel tricked.

robin also hasnt been represented as repressed at all. she assumed steve wouldnt want to be her friend but other than that she is not ashamed, just careful because she needs to be. i think homophobes prefer this in media. when they see the ugly side of it they claim theyre focusing way too much on the gay shit.

also the fact that will is their second canon queer character. like i said, they see robin as just a tool for representation points so the fact that theres a second queer character completely unrelated or uninvolved with the first one makes them think “you already have robin why do you need another gay character!!” i think this would also be the case if will was canon first and then robin was introduced.

i also think the fact that theyre guys makes a difference too. i think with robin and vickie, even tho its well established that at least robin has feelings, they can play it off as some girly besties hanging out but with guys its so different. we saw max and el holding hands in s3 and no one thought that was weird but we probably wouldnt see lucas and dustin like that. so i really dont think theyll like it if/when byler kiss.

for ronance i think since theres zero chance of that actually happening and most people who ship them are well aware of this, they dont even bother with the hate. bylers already half canon tho so they feel like their precious hetero ship is threatened.

i could write a whole paper about this honestly. theres so much else.

[zalrb]

do you agree with what initiumseries said here?

https://www.tumblr.com/initiumseries/717417386813358080/the-post-im-referencing?

I agree with what she's saying in terms of scale

Klaus feels like a petty baby vampire, and the actor doesn't have the gravitas to land a vampire that's over a thousand years old. Because they're just sort of...feeding and causing mischief for a summer, there's no plan, the level of destruction feels very contained. They say, oh they're killing people across state lines, but we don't see the cops, who are also supposed to be vampire killers, tracking this, maybe having a network that's hunting them, we don't see the magnitude of the impact, it's all just contained to a few bodies in a house each time.

TVD has always had a problem with scale even within Mystic Falls. When Maryann gets control of Bon Temps, it's complete chaos, like people are ripping out their own intestines, there are orgies and there's cannibalism and of course they can't do on The CW what they do on HBO but they can show impact and TVD sucks at that.

I do feel differently when it comes to the personal stakes for Stefan and for Stelena, though.

In the season 2 finale, we get that desperation and anger and resentment at what Klaus is forcing him to do

we also get the switch to something primal

and I understand her desire to want more of this throughout his time with Klaus in season 3 but for me, I think we see him check out in these scenes, like the disassociation has happened; him ignoring a call from Elena with that blank stare after which he kills a human is an indication of him repressing his humanity

so him being his attack dog in 3x01 works for me

and I do think we see him drowning and how much he hates what he's doing

even in 3x02 because Paul is expressive so we see the desperation is in his eyes

and Klaus giving him a lot of freedom because he wants a brother and he wanted Stefan's allegiance without resorting to compulsion, while in the bigger narrative is ridiculous and lacks stakes, for Stefan I think the fact that Klaus is actively trying to seduce him to the dark side as it were

while Stefan has to reconcile the things he's done in the past,

as well as his ripper nature which he keeps feeding

and protecting Elena, which includes getting her to stop looking for him

works for me because it's about will there ever come a line where Elena really does mean nothing to him anymore or will there ever come a line where Elena will actually be done?

Which also leads to the emotional stakes for something like the closet scene is more whether or not Stefan and Elena can survive this, she's standing in a closet with a list of his victims etched into the wall

I also personally enjoy the fact that when he's with Elena, the emotions he's kept in comes out because how could it not come out with Elena?

So Klaus works for me specifically related to Stefan and Stelena. Much like how Katherine works for me specifically related to how she fucked up Stefan's life.

[intrulogical]

No, no, please go into detail! I would love to hear more about your thoughts!

I wouldn't necessarily call Remus an alarm clock, but mostly cause I'm pedantic lol and Remus doesn't have that aspect of timing/immediate response like Virgil does. He certainly has that aspect of forcing confrontation with emotional truths Thomas doesn't want to acknowledge but needs to because even if they're repressed they're still affecting him.

Oooh, I love that parallel between Remus and Logan and them representing truths Thomas has a hard time acknowledging, especially because they represent such different truths too. Logan is generally objective, dispassionate truths - the most conscious part of the thinking process seemingly separate from the emotions - which tend to go unacknowledged because emotions tend to have a much stronger sway on humans. While Remus is unflattering emotional truths - those parts of the self that had been repressed into the subconscious - which tend to go unacknowledged because they disrupt the self-image of the ego. They're on totally different sides of the conscious vs subconscious spectrum but still share a similar fate.

Hmmm... I'm not sure calling Remus forbidden thoughts (presumably in contrast to Orange's forbidden emotions?) is entirely accurate, because he doesn't seem to represent only thoughts (like how in wtit he brings to the surface Thomas anxiety over his loneliness). It seems to me like a better distinction would be that Remus is about acknowledging the repressed and Orange (presumably) is about externalizing the repressed. Obviously with some more nuances that we can't really discuss without seeing the specific presentation of Orange first, but I don't think that nuance will come down to thought vs emotions.

\o/ YIPPEE

when i describe remus as an alarm clock, i don't really mean it in a sense of, he has a sense of timing— more of the fact that he serves as a wake up call to both thomas and the other sides. he surfaces repressed ideas, literally serving as thomas' AND logan's wakeup call in wtit.

i also think it's perfect remus and logan are two sides of thought, especially since logan's entire arc is rooted in the fact that he's actively Turning Away from suggesting anything that thomas may dislike because he was proven so incredibly wrong in lntao. not that he still does things he wants, but he doesn't enforce them in the same way he does before, and it's such a perfect opposite to remus who does nothing but Enforce his ideas. idk smth abt these two drive me NUTS

on the last part, when i say remus represents forbidden thoughts, i dont mean he Just represents forbidden thoughts. that's definitely just one part of his many roles, like when we say dark creativity and intrusive thoughts. i do think there's some merit in remus representing the repressed (internalized) v orange as the repressed (externalized)! goes well w the idea i have for orange thus far. it's part of the most recent analysis i made on the guy :3

[ssickprimus]

Jerry teaches Rick how to cook

A/N : i stared at this for a long time, like really LONG time, unable to conjure anything humane and normal. so eventually, i stopped trying and it’s just, well, it’s rick & jerry doing cute stuff, but also not really lol. and this isn't beted, bc yeah, i die like a man.

....

....

Cooking was one of those activities, that Jerry kept mostly to himself. Engaging in it, either when it was a special occasion, or when he had nothing better to do, and no one was around to judge him. Mainly, Beth. 

He didn’t feel like doing it too often, and then, at times when he did felt like cooking just because he could, well, there wasn’t much gratitude for his efforts. He wasn’t bad at it, and he knew, that the kids actually loved, when he was the one cooking dinner, instead of their mother. 

But there didn’t seem to be much point in it. 

Beth tended to get all defensive over ‘who would be behind the stove today’, and he rarely had a chance to win this fight. If he had to guess, that it had less to do with the fact, that she wanted to prepare the dinner and more with just not letting him do it. Petty for petty. Eye for an eye, or in their case, just who would cook, and who would throw away the trash. 

Usually, it didn’t bother him too much. Many things stopped getting under his skin, after a while. But he couldn’t fully repress all of it, not when there was a new ‘threat’ inside the house. Looming over his shoulder and ready to spring yet another sharp comment his way. 

“What?” he girth out, not turning to face Rick, but knowing, that the old man was hovering there, staring at him for at least two minutes now. 

“Nothing.” Rick replied just as stiffly. 

“Then why are you here?” 

He expected usual rudeness, but oddly enough Rick was silent and it sort of unnerved Jerry. Usually, his father-in-law would find a thing or two to throw his way. Insult him or just be mean by default, but this time, it seemed like he didn’t have anything smart to say. 

“Okay, you’ve – you’ve got me, maybe I do need something.” 

Right. 

Of course, he did! 

Jerry glanced at the old man over his shoulder, not trying to mask his irritation. It was one of rare days, when he could do whatever he wanted, be it gardening, binge watching some dumb show or in this case, baking himself some cookies. 

It was a very simple and almost mind-numbing task. He just wanted to do something and not think about anything particular. Surely, not anything of importance. Just be content with what he was doing at the moment. 

The kids were out, and Beth was at work. He was surprised, that Rick didn’t vanish as well, since he came to pester him, only when he wanted something specific or was bored out of his mind. And Rick didn’t seem like the latter was his reason for sticking around, so it naturally made Jerry paranoid. Whatever his father-in-law was plotting, it won’t be good for him. 

“I’m just –” the old man frowned and looked to the side, rubbing his neck in what Jerry almost took as sign of embarrassment. Huh, weird. Rick and embarrassment? Something must have died in the forest this morning. “I don’t –”

“Yeah?” Jerry propped himself against the table, watching him with crossed arms. Skeptical as ever. He didn’t trusted this show for one second. 

“Can you –” Rick chewed on his lip, now looking somewhat pissed off. He clearly struggled with himself. “Can y-you help me with something?” 

Rick’s last sentence slid into a mumbled, hissy mess, but Jerry still was able to make it out. And it took him aback. Truly and fully so. 

“I – ahh um…” Jerry paused, not sure how to react. This sounded so uncharastically polite coming from Rick, that for a second, he started feeling a nagging worry, that something might have been seriously wrong here. “But what is –”

“It’s – this is important, Jerry!” Rick suddenly snapped (and it was more like it, honestly), and with two fast, big steps reached toward him, roughly grabbing Jerry’s arm, yanking on it.  

“W-wait, Rick!” Jerry squicked out, not having time to do much as the old man started dragging him toward the garage. “Wait, where – where are we going!?” 

Rick ignored him. 

“Rick!” 

He just wanted to make some cookies, darn it! Whatever Rick wanted out of him, it most likely wasn’t worth it. Oh gosh. What if he – what if he wanted to do something terrible with him, because no one was home?? Oh shit….oh god! 

“Th-this – that’s really – like r-really serious, Jerry!” Rick rambled, still tugging him along. “Y-you – you have no idea!” 

“Y-yeah, I –owww, easy, would you!?” 

“N-no time! We – we don’t have much time, Jerry!”

“Much time for what?” 

Rick was fully ignorant of Jerry’s growing discomfort, or maybe, he just didn’t care. Either way, Jerry won’t go down without fighting! Well, kind of fighting. Or whining, more likely. 

“Riiick!” 

“We – you’re going to – I need your help, didn’t you listen!?” Rick accused, spitting a bit of saliva on Jerry’s face, who immediately cringed, still trapped by his hold. “I – I – I was trying to tell you, Jerry! Y-you – you just never listen, do you? Dear G-god. Y-y – you’re worse, than a Morty, when – when it comes t-t-to listening, Jerry! Is this some – some ear disease? Do you have an ear disease?” 

“What…no!” 

“Then, help me!” 

“Help you with what?” Jerry questioned for n-time it seems, allowing Rick to guide him right to his working table. “What is –” 

“Help me w – with th-this!” the old man pointed at the table, letting go of him with something, that seemed to remind Jerry of an ill-placed triumph. Like it was the moment, where he should have got the wind of the situation. “This is it, Jerry! This is the – this is the moment, when – when you can finally do something big, Jerry!”  

Jerry rubbed his wrist, also glancing down at it. And okay, now he was beyond confused. What the actual hell was this even? “I don’t get it.”

“Your moment, Jerry!” Rick reminded him, as if this was one true calling for him or something. “It’s here! Ri – right here, jerry!”

 “Uhhh?”

“Y-your time has come, Jerry!” Rick made a serious face, and placed a heavy hand onto his shoulder, while the younger man just sort of stood there, perplexed and uncertain. “This – that’s your moment, Jerry! A moment f-for you to shine!” 

He made a waving gesture with his free hand, like he was pointing at the horizon or something just as inspiring, but Jerry’s unsureness only deepened. He didn’t know what Rick wanted him to do. 

“This!” Rick pointed at the table again. 

“Okay, but what exactly do you want me to do with it?” 

“Isn’t it obvious?” 

Jerry’s attention returned to a mess of something on the table. It seemed like a bunch of ingredients, maybe? A bag of powder-like substance, a few other bags with odd things, that reminded him of Rick’s weird alien food in the kitchen’s shelf. But he still didn’t know what he was supposed to do with all of this. Mix it up or…?

“…yeah, it is.” Jerry said, swallowing. Getting more nervous by the second. “But some instructions might be nice. Just in case, y’know?” 

Rick rolled his eyes. “Cookies, Jerry.”

He blinked. “Excuse me?”

The older man let out an exasperated sigh and gripped Jerry’s other shoulder, yanking him closer, almost nose to nose. He really had no idea what personal space was, did he? “I need you to make me the – make me the cookies out of it.” 

“Make you…” Jerry blinked. “C-cookies?”

“Yes, Jerry.” Rick repeated, losing his patience. “Y-yes, the cookies. Make grandpa – you need to give me those cookies, Jerry. I – I mean, make me these cookies.” 

Jerry’s brows knitted together. “That’s it?” 

“Uh, yeah?” 

They stared at one another, as Jerry was slowly overcoming his distrust over how simple, and oddly innocent the request was. Things were never this plain with Rick. And he never wanted something this mundane from him before.

“So you want me to bake you cookies out of this - uhh - that stuff and –” Jerry leaned away from him, searching for any sign of a lie in Rick’s expression. “And that’s it?” 

“Yeah.”  

“For real?” Jerry looked around them. “No double bottom in this one? No dangerous consequences?”

“I’m asking you t-to make me cookies, not a nuclear bomb, Jerry.” Rick hissed. “Yesh, so – so paranoid, are you?” he then, cleared his throat, taking a step back as if recalling that he has to be nice to him for once. “But yes. It’s – that’s it.”

Jerry raised one brow up. “Huh.” 

“So y-you’re – will you do that?” Rick asked this with a bizarre amount of hope. 

“Well…” 

Jerry looked at the mess on the table once again, considering it. Did he have to do anything for Rick? No, not really. Far from it, actually. But the old man asked him almost nicely, and it’s not like it will take all that much time, anyway. He can go back to baking regular cookies right after that. 

Finally, Jerry half-shrugged. “Ah, yeah sure. I guess…?” 

Rick’s face instantly lit up. “Alriiiight! That’s what I’m talking about!” 

Then, he just proceeded to look at Jerry, expecting whatever wonder to happen out of thin air, apparently. 

“We will need - uh – a bowl and a mixer to bake cookies, Rick.” Jerry pointed out, growing uncomfortable with Rick’s fingers digging into his shoulders. He was yet to release him or even to get out of his face fully. 

“Makes sense, yeah.” 

“Great.” Jerry rubbed his nose bridge. “Can you bring me some?” 

Rick’s eyes slightly widened, as if in shock. “Who? Me?”

“Well, yes.” Jerry drawled out, feeling more bold, now that it was established, that Rick needed his help. “I won’t do everything on my own! You can at least help me out in small ways.” 

For a second, it looked like Rick was about to flip him off, but surprisingly, he did the opposite of it. Oddly compliant and ready to do his part. Or well, as ready as he could be. 

“Alright-alright, I’ll – I’ll get that shit for you.” 

“Thank you.” Jerry offered pleasantly, when Rick went back to the kitchen, muttering under his own breath. If his father-in-law thought, that he could sit this one out, while Jerry would have done all the work, he was solemnly mistaken. “And while you are there, can you also bring me some cookie sheets?” 

More grunting followed. 

“A wh-what now?”

“It’s like the – uhh – it’s on the counter. Looks like a sheet list?” 

“Ohh.” there was some noise, and then some drag of the feet against the floor. Rick was probably looking everywhere, but at the place he needed, until, “Got it.” 

“Good. Bring it in here and let’s do some cooking!” 

He stared down at an odd collection of foods and ingredients, feeling a bit more positive about this, then he did before. “Okay…let’s do some magic.” 

Jerry cracked his knuckles, getting back into the mood. Baking cookies together, sounded peaceful enough for a shared evening with his usually unbearably chaotic father-in-law. Surely nothing can go wrong, right? 

.

.

“Why did you ask me to do it, anyway?” he asked after a few minutes, mixing what eventually was going to be a dodge for the cookies. It smelled a bit weird, but he supposed, that it was natural. He had no idea if the substance was even sweet or not. 

“Wh-what?” 

“I mean…” Jerry gave him a curious look. “Can’t you do it yourself?” 

“If I could I wouldn’t have – I would have needed to ask you, Jerry.” 

“So you really can’t cook, ah?” Jerry paused, glancing into the bowl, where a mix of strange aliens cookies was only half-done. It didn’t seem all that bad now, but the odd purple color was certainly a turn off. 

“And if —” Rick cleared his throat. “And if I can’t?” 

“I can teach you.” he was already regretting saying it, but the old man made a weird noise, getting up from his seat, like he was waiting for this moment. 

“What for?” 

“So that you can do it by yourself in the future?” 

Rick stared at him for a bit, before he closed the gap between them, lightly hitting Jerry with his bony hip. “Alright show th–the – show me what you’ve got.” 

Jerry couldn’t fight off a smile off his face. It was very rare, when he got to share his interests with someone. Less so with someone from his family. 

“Alright, first you need to –” 

He wasn’t a total disaster at explaining, but it seemed like Rick listened to him only partly, mostly just staring at him and occasionally nodding, as if creating an air of interest. But it wasn’t all that bad, since Jerry found it pretty easy to just get lost in cooking, instead of paying too much attention to what was possibly happening inside Rick’s head. 

Jerry was pretty sure, that at least an hour should have passed, since Rick had dragged him in here, but he didn’t mind. The cookies, that he was making still looked sort of odd, and very unearthly, but some extra chocolate-like bits made it seem more eatable, than it was before. 

He wouldn’t have risked it anyways, but he was curious what they might have tasted like. 

“If you wanted some homemade cookies, you could have just eaten some of my usual ones.” Jerry supplied, attempting to be casual, since they were technically bonding and all. “I wouldn't have minded.” 

“It’s – this isn’t for me.” Rick said, putting some of the cookies on the cookie sheet, like Jerry had asked him to. “It’s for th-the business.” 

“You opened a bakery?” Jerry joked, because geez, was this a ridiculous imagery. 

“No, but I –” Rick clicked his jaw shut, suddenly hissing at him, “Don’t snort this stuff, you moron!” 

“Wha…?” it was just some powder, that he accidently poured over the bowl. He didn’t mean for it to plow into the air, and cloud close to his chin. “It’s not – ew, it smells strange. What is this?” 

“Nothing for your – nothing for you to question!”

“But –” 

Rick pinched Jerry’s nose shut, and sort of pushed him out of the way. “I said, don’t breathe it in, Jerry! Can’t you – you do have an ear disease, don’t you? You can’t hear shit!” 

“I didn’t – ow!” he recoiled from Rick’s grasp, watching the old man doing the rest by himself, so clearly he did remember some of Jerry’s teaching. “Why can’t I breathe it in?” 

Rick side-glanced at him, looking somewhat nervous. “Because you might get allergic, Jerry.” 

“…why?” 

“I don’t know, aren’t you – don’t you have any allergies?” 

Not that he knew, but it was slowly getting more and more weird, as Jerry looked around them. Taking in how shifty Rick’s behavior became the second he nearly inhaled some odd substance, and the smell – 

“That’s not some cosmic illegal drug cookies, is it?” 

Rick’s eyes darted from left to right, as he hunched somewhat protective over the bowl, before deadpaning, “No.” 

“Then –”

“Jerry, stop asking me th-that – stop asking stupid things and just – just do what I’ve asked you to do.” Rick snapped, grabbing his wrist and tugging him back to the table. “Y-you have one job, dawg. Just one – you have one job, Jerry!” 

“Alright-alright, I’m doing it!” Jerry exclaimed back. “I’m doing it!” 

“Do it faster!” 

“I can’t do it faster, when you – why do you have to be this close to me!?” 

“To – to –” Rick’s drool dripped down on his shoulder, which was strange, since he wasn’t drunk yet. “Just do the thing, Jerry!” 

“This is the last time, when I’m helping you!” 

.

.

After a few more miserable attempts to do some sort of damage control and some endless banter, the cookies were finally inside the oven, and Jerry was sort of covered in that powder, that Rick told him not to breath in and – 

He was feeling kind of weird now. A bit dizzy, but also lightweight, like he was slightly tipsy. 

“Am…I’m going to die?” 

Rick sends him a surprise look. “N-no. Wh-why would you think that?” 

“I dunno…” Jerry whined, as everything sort of swayed around him and all over him…? “I feel strangeooo – I mean, stranga – I mean –” 

“Don’t be a little bitch, Jerry.” Rick told him, wrapping a long, bony arm around Jerry’s shoulder and smearing his cheek with rusty, awful unclean breath. “This was – this was your moment.” 

“My moment?” 

“Yeah, we – we made these cookies and it’s going to be a hit, Jerry!” Rick rocked them from side to side, like it should have made Jerry feel inspired, instead it only made him choke on air, since Rick’s hold was yet to move away from his neck. It just kind of slid from his shoulder to his neck. Can something slid upwards?? “It’s – this is going to be a world changing cookie!” 

“Oh, okay.” this didn’t sound all that bad. “That’s good?” 

“A cookie made of – of seven forbidden, illegal ingredients from all over th-the – the galaxy!” 

Jerry’s brain was too slow to follow, but he frowned anyway, feeling a pang of doubt. “Wait, did you just say for – oh…” 

Rick pressed a finger into his nose, giving him one of those wild, scary looks of his. “And it’s all thanks to – to you, Jerry!” 

“To me?” 

“Yeah, I’ve – I’ve needed some extra DNA on them to – to make it work, Jerry!” Rick explained, but Jerry could barely make out the words, let alone combine them together into something coherent. “This year, it’ll be a hit of the – it’s be Rick and Jerry cookies, that are – that will fuck up brains of many aliens out th-there, Jerry!” 

“R-rick, you’re choking me…” Jerry forced out, unable to lean away from the older man, who was getting more and more into that rambling mess of words and – 

“We are going t-to rule over them with those cookies! Gonna be cooler, th-than the movie – you know the movie, the one with the – uhhh – the thing?” 

“Wh – hckk!” 

Rick pressed their faces uncomfortably close together, still speaking nonsense. “It’s gonna be human-trafficking Rick and Jerry’s business with – with cookies! Drug-dealing ring of – our drug-dealing ring!” 

Jerry could only make a weird, airly noise, mostly just dangling in his grip and distantly thinking, that hey, at least, it seems like he has a job now.

Besides, when there is a credit to be given. He would give one. Rick was good with names. Because 'Rick & Jerry's drug, human-trafficking ring business' sounded hella nice to his clouded and slow brain.

[rin-and-jade]

Hello, it is D again, returning with some news and answers and more questions :D

Starting off with some answers, I've only actively been aware of Shadow for a few months but they feel like they've always been there if that makes any sense? Their presence feels natural, but I wasn't consciously aware of them until like mid-July. I kinda feel him more if I talk about them ig, like he knows that they would wanna be here for that conversation? Additionally, when I feel "closer to them" per se, it does feel like my emotions are being influenced, at least slightly. Like I'll feel them move closer and I've got this tightly bound coil of anxiety in my gut that lessens when they move away again. I'm also kinda certain that he/they feels right when referring to them, like with pretty much anything else I get a strong feeling of wrong that I'm pretty sure isn't me? Idk tho

In news... there really is none. My attempts at finding stuff relating to memory and repressed trauma weren't very helpful unfortunately :/ but from talking with people apparently my particular flavour of memory loss isn't the most average of experiences so that's a thing (will probably elaborate more if I remember)

Ok questions!! This is more of a "do you guys know anything or can a follower help please" question than one that's really really intended for you guys lol but yeah. Is it a normal singlet thing to have these different personas, basically. Like you've got your online persona, your school/church/I'm-a-functional-human-being persona, your close friends persona, and your late at night persona. And these different personas are aware that the others exist and know more or less what they cover, but any specific memories with them are locked? Like for example I know that I went to school today but unless I magically become school-D right now I know zero specifics. Important to note that I have no control over when I "become" these personas, they just kind of happen. They all feel like me, but my memory is split up between them and they tend to respond to different names and have slightly different pronoun preferences. And sometimes if a memory from a time I don't have access to gets unlocked I start to get fed a lot of related memories like they're slipping through cracks in my brain and it gets rlly hard to figure out which persona I feel like :) is this normal or should I be concerned? Ideally I would like the different D's to talk to each other because online-D just straight up has no knowledge of homework existing it seems and while personally I (don't know who "I" is atm if we're going with the personas tho) don't really mind I just got a burst of agitation that I'm pretty sure wasn't me that implies that sentiment isn't shared.

There's probably some more stuff that I wanted to mention that I forgot about but my memory has been a mess lately and we're sick and I finally don't have that freaking insomnia so I'm gonna go to sleep now byee <3

I mentioned that this is from D right?

Hm.. i see, you can elaborate more with your findings later then.

yes,, it is actually normal for singlets to have different sides or "sonas" but only to an extent, they do not involve having locked memories from each other and in fact, can transition, and they know which they should be, they also know other kinds of memories (i have singlet friends and i observed them for long, but it is in my own interpretation) that isn't limited to the certain persona they're currently as.

There's a subtle sign that you're disconnected between each of your own sides? If that's how i see it. If you don't have the usual memory amnesia, what about the emotional one? Go check please, possibly look for osdd,, i hope others can give you some input too.

- j

[voidfcllen]

OC Master Post

Below the cut is a comprehensive list of my Oc’s available on this blog. You will find their primary face claims, their fandoms, and bullet points listing relevant information in their history and personalities, and in some cases links to their playlists. I’m going to make this post accessible from my Pinned Post so you can reference it later!

Superhero Oc’s

Felix Damery - Miraculous Ladybug / Fandomless

Previous Chat Noir. Very much retired.

Repressed Rich kid with a strict upbringing who never wanted to be a superhero but the god who gave him his magic ring cursed it to his hand until he could get true loves kiss. So he didn’t get a choice.

His father ran a weapons distribution company and was a magical terrorist on the side. He’s in prison now thanks directly to Felix’s involvement as Chat Noir.

Very Rich between his inheritance and liquidating his father’s company. His long-term girlfriend (only because he keeps getting cold feet on proposing) sells wedding dresses and he’s given her a significant investment cause he’s a simp.

He believes his mother is dead and vice versa, this is not the case, and neither of them know this. It’s another one of the ways Raphael Damery sucks.

Lives in New York with his girlfriend and goes back and forth between New York and Paris when convenient.

Link to his Playlist

Marcus Haprele - Miraculous Ladybug / Fandomless

Fae ancestry that gives him Mime Powers. Can mime things into existence but he physically cannot shut up. Only one item at a time and he has to actually have intimate knowledge of said item.

His father is a retired assassin.

Conspiracy nut, like red string bulletin board conspiracy nut. This is how he discovered his dad was a retired assassin. Fred Haprele was not retired at the time of this discovery.

His superhero name is Kid Mime (just The Mime now, he’s in his 30′s)

Has a little sister he would murder for.

Lives in Italy and operates an acting troupe there. He has a degree in engineering, but this has no relevance to his career.

Has a younger cousin named Claude living in london.

Still an Active Hero

Gal Alvarez - Dudepow / Fandomless

Gal is a spanish-american girl who lives with her older brother Kelly, her stay at home artist father, and police commissioner mother. Her best friend Maizey is her most loyal and trusted sidekick.

When Gal was twelve her family moved into her deceased uncle's home, and she discovered the magic ring that had been passed down their family line from man to man. Upon putting it on, Gal became bound to the ring until her death-- specific conditions notwithstanding. Now she is the first Dudepow in history to ever be a woman!

Gal is arrogant, rebellious, prideful, and feels emotions very deeply. She cares a lot for her friends and family, but never thinks before she acts. While on the surface she thinks very highly of herself and hardly ever takes criticism, Gal is very insecure in her identity as herself, verses her identity as a Superhero, where she can fit the expected 'mold' of Dudepow.

Gal has been keeping this secret from her parents for years and is an accomplished hero in her own right now. Dudepow is a magical girl style transformation using the phrase “sock it to me broseph.”

Downsides to being a Macho Man Superhero as a Teenage Girl are insane. Dudepow as a hero represents a lot of toxic masculinity that Gal is slowly trying to change as she modernizes the role of Dudepow.

As Gal her Pronouns are She / Her, as Dudepow they are He / Him.

Link to Her Playlist

Evelyn Clavell - Dudewhap / Fandomless

Gal’s alter ego’s Evil Clone

Ev was born from when Gal broke off a press on nail in a fight as Dudepow. Gal found her clone, and decided to take him home because what else were you gonna do with a whole ass duplicate?

Ev and Gal were best friends, they dated! They were inseparable for years to the jealousy of Gal's best friend. They even fought crime together. But, the more Ev fought evil, the more he began to like it. Evil looked like fun! You could do so many things that the stuffy "he-roic handbook" Gal had to follow didn't let you!

Eventually, Ev became bored of fighting evil, and bored of Gal, and it all went downhill from there.

Ev is solely motivated by his own enjoyment. He only cares about having fun and will throw aside anyone and anything that starts to get boring.

He is manipulative, and petulant, and hides it behind a veil of bubbly personality, gifts, and kind gestures that make it difficult to realize the toxic layer underneath.

Pronouns are he / they.

Being Gal’s clone, he can take on her civilian form a well, but he just doesn’t like too and almost never does unless he was forced too.

Employed by and somewhat mentored by Gal’s inherited archenemy Andrea Clavell, hence where he got the last name.

Link to His Playlist

Pokemon Oc’s

Millie Bolton - Pokemon

From Galar, her Pokemon partner is a Kantonian Meowth named Whiskers.

The extremely excitable wild child born to wooloo shepard parents. They live on a farm just outside of a town, and they sell wool to a popular textile company in Wyndon. Millie is an only child.

Whiskers is her partner, but the Pokemon that is her ace is the Wooloo who she grew up beside on the farm.

Millie’s dream is to become a champion level trainer, and to see all of Galar (and maybe even beyond) due to growing up in such a small hometown. Always looking for new adventures.

Will turn everything into a competition.

Can cook but spends hours gathering berries only to fall asleep right after.

Team: Whiskers, Wooloo, Impidimp, Grookey, Munchlax

Aedan Cavanaugh - Pokemon

From Galar, his Pokemon Partner is a Polteageist named Chamomile

The son of tea merchants. His family lives above his late grandmother’s tea shop, though his mother has long since expanded the business into a small chain of cafes and commercially sold tea blends.

Met Polteageist as a Sinistea after his grandmother’s funeral, and it evolved when he accidentally chipped his grandmother’s favorite antique tea pot.

Aedan is participating in the Gym Challenges to test himself to see how far he and his team can really go.

He’s still figuring out what kind of Pokemon Trainer he wants to be.

He spends a lot of time in battle cafes and expanding his currydex.

Very much wants to evolve a Matcha Cream Alcremie

Team: Chamomile, Vanillish, Swovet, Darumaka, Sobble

Fandomless Oc’s

Liz Ruin / Fandomless

Has verses for Yugioh, Pokemon, and BNHA.

Liz lived in japan with her parents, before they were promoted, and their jobs took them away from home.

She spent a few years in america with her grandfather on her mother’s side and her cousin in their game shop. Eventually Liz would move back to japan, but she visits her grandfather every summer.

Liz has the psychic ability to view the future in her dreams, usually in confusing, sporadic bursts that she can’t quite make any sense of when she wakes up. While awake, she gets bursts of what she calls her “shitty spidey sense” where she’ll know when something is about to happen near her, but not what.

It could be anything from ‘life threatening accident’ to ‘someone is goanna burn their mouth on their coffee’ and she has no way of telling these feelings apart. In her BNHA verse, this is also her quirk, and its official name would be “Precognition”.

Liz is the biggest bi to ever bi, with a strong lean towards cute girls, and seems almost exclusively attracted to boys who are lowkey dumbasses.

If you’ve earned her loyalty, you’ve earned it for life. Also, perhaps a touch more violent than you expect a four foot eight inches tall cute girl to be at first glance.

Link to her Playlist

Eeriee McLaughlin / Fandomless

Her older brother went missing a year ago, and she’s the only one who hasn’t given up searching for him.

She took a jacket from his room that turned out to be a wolf pelt, now she’s a werewolf and will use her supernatural powers to find her brother. Somehow. She isn’t sure how that will work yet.

Her mom is the mayor of the town.

There’s a lot of weird stuff in Angel Hollow (the town) that she hadn’t noticed before becoming one of the weird things herself.

Her new friend Florance is the son of the investigator her mom hired to find her brother, and they’re both incorrigible snoops.

Convinced the weird stuff in town will lead her to her brother.

[italiangothicwriteblr]

Happy Wbw, tell me about magic in your world. What are the rules, do you have any magical organizations, how do people generally feel about magic?

Hi! Thanks for the ask!

Magic in my world is something you have to be born with, but it isn't genetic. There's no way to predict if someone will get it or not. Even if you're born with it, there are still some aspects you have to practice.

Some magic will just burst out if you're feeling emotional enough--it takes practice to hold it back.

In terms of things you need to learn--one specific thing that usually gets neglected (because a good chunk of sorcerers are working for the villains and learn darker magic) is curse-breaking and recognizing a magic spell or imposter. Nova dedicated herself to the more "practical" aspects of magic, and she's probably the actual best at it.

(Tangent: Spell detection is hard. You have to be a sorcerer, but also know exactly what to look for. Books and old wives' tales circulate about how anyone can do it, but most of the advice is useless. If you want to know, you need a trained sorcerer.)

Magical organizations--the closest thing I have are the two groups that sorcerers usually fall into. They aren't official or anything, but I'll do a rundown here because I've been meaning to.

First group--the ones that attach themselves to the remala in exchange for being able to live openly. Picture a feudalism or patronage type of system. (Note: It's always the remala, because reantica aristocrats who hate magic tend to be internally consistent. They hate magic, so they won't utilize magical help/labor. The remala don't care). This is what Giacomo and Orianna do, as well as a lot of others during Basilio's reign. Even before him, though, there would be sorcerers who helped out someone powerful to avoid scorn, it just wasn't as prolific/they weren't actively avoiding persecution. The issue here is that most remala nobles don't understand how magic overuse works and don't care. Giacomo is the best example--after 20 years working for the Imperatore, he's almost drained. People who take this route get relative "safety", but it's always awful and painful. They're disliked by the remala for their powers (unless they're being useful in that moment) and disliked by everyone else for supporting the villains. It's a very, very bad deal.

Second group--The ones who go to any and all lengths to hide their magic, and assimilate into non-magical society. This is Nova and Leandro. It's not as common a path to take, because it requires a lot of work and focus, and the consequences if you fail and are found out are severe. Nobody, especially nobles, wants the stain of having openly associated with a sorcerer (unless it's one of the above arrangements), so they'll turn on friends or family if they're found out. This even happens in reantica territory, although the sorcerer usually isn't killed. The two pearls of wisdom usually handed out to people who are going to attempt this are

Don't try and rise too high, just be content with a safe, simple life.

Under NO CIRCUMSTANCES should you date or marry an aristocrat, especially from the five families. (This is why Leandro never married for political reasons. Even with his magic mostly repressed, marrying a reantica noble was too big a risk if he got found out. Even the most powerful man in the world never attempted it.)

You can see why Nova's whole family begs her not to get involved with Livia. She does it anyway. (Even Enrico is like "Um...not to judge...but I knew your dad and he's allowing this? Isn't it dangerous? Nova: Yes it is. He is not.)

These two groups do not like each other. People who hide think that people who work for the remala are sellouts, that they traded morals for an easier life (they don't know how bad conditions are, they're picturing luxury). People who work think that people who hide are cowards, suicidal, or both. There's an air of "turning on your own kind" and "siding with the oppressor" (they, also, don't know how much stress and work goes into hiding. They're picturing free, easy living.)

As for how people feel about magic--in the TTH time period, people want to believe that all anti-magic prejudice was completely started by Basilio. But, when we get to TKATF, we see that isn't really the case. There's always been an innate distrust of magic, especially among the nobility. All Basilio did was exaggerate what was already there, and make hating magic official government policy.

[voidfell]

OC Master Post

Superhero Oc’s

Felix Damery - Miraculous Ladybug / Fandomless

Previous Chat Noir. Very much retired.

Repressed Rich kid with a strict upbringing who never wanted to be a superhero but the god who gave him his magic ring cursed it to his hand until he could get true loves kiss. So he didn’t get a choice.

His father ran a weapons distribution company and was a magical terrorist on the side. He’s in prison now thanks directly to Felix’s involvement as Chat Noir.

Very Rich between his inheritance and liquidating his father’s company. His long-term girlfriend (only because he keeps getting cold feet on proposing) sells wedding dresses and he’s given her a significant investment cause he’s a simp.

He believes his mother is dead and vice versa, this is not the case, and neither of them know this. It’s another one of the ways Raphael Damery sucks.

Lives in New York with his girlfriend and goes back and forth between New York and Paris when convenient.

Marcus Haprele - Miraculous Ladybug / Fandomless

Fae ancestry that gives him Mime Powers. Can mime things into existence but he physically cannot shut up. Only one item at a time and he has to actually have intimate knowledge of said item.

His father is a retired assassin.

Conspiracy nut, like red string bulletin board conspiracy nut. This is how he discovered his dad was a retired assassin. Fred Haprele was not retired at the time of this discovery.

His superhero name is Kid Mime (just The Mime now, he’s in his 30′s)

Has a little sister he would murder for.

Lives in Italy and operates an acting troupe there. He has a degree in engineering, but this has no relevance to his career.

Has a younger cousin named Claude living in london.

Still an Active Hero

Gal Alvarez - Dudepow / Fandomless

Gal is a spanish-american girl who lives with her older brother Kelly, her stay at home artist father, and police commissioner mother. Her best friend Maizey is her most loyal and trusted sidekick.

When Gal was twelve her family moved into her deceased uncle’s home, and she discovered the magic ring that had been passed down their family line from man to man. Upon putting it on, Gal became bound to the ring until her death– specific conditions notwithstanding. Now she is the first Dudepow in history to ever be a woman!

Gal is arrogant, rebellious, prideful, and feels emotions very deeply. She cares a lot for her friends and family, but never thinks before she acts. While on the surface she thinks very highly of herself and hardly ever takes criticism, Gal is very insecure in her identity as herself, verses her identity as a Superhero, where she can fit the expected ‘mold’ of Dudepow.

Gal has been keeping this secret from her parents for years and is an accomplished hero in her own right now. Dudepow is a magical girl style transformation using the phrase “sock it to me broseph.”

Downsides to being a Macho Man Superhero as a Teenage Girl are insane. Dudepow as a hero represents a lot of toxic masculinity that Gal is slowly trying to change as she modernizes the role of Dudepow.

As Gal her Pronouns are She / Her, as Dudepow they are He / Him.

Evelyn Clavell - Dudewhap / Fandomless

Gal’s alter ego’s Evil Clone

Ev was born from when Gal broke off a press on nail in a fight as Dudepow. Gal found her clone, and decided to take him home because what else were you gonna do with a whole ass duplicate?

Ev and Gal were best friends, they dated! They were inseparable for years to the jealousy of Gal’s best friend. They even fought crime together. But, the more Ev fought evil, the more he began to like it. Evil looked like fun! You could do so many things that the stuffy “he-roic handbook” Gal had to follow didn’t let you!

Eventually, Ev became bored of fighting evil, and bored of Gal, and it all went downhill from there.

Ev is solely motivated by his own enjoyment. He only cares about having fun and will throw aside anyone and anything that starts to get boring.

He is manipulative, and petulant, and hides it behind a veil of bubbly personality, gifts, and kind gestures that make it difficult to realize the toxic layer underneath.

Pronouns are he / they.

Being Gal’s clone, he can take on her civilian form a well, but he just doesn’t like too and almost never does unless he was forced too.

Employed by and somewhat mentored by Gal’s inherited archenemy Andrea Clavell, hence where he got the last name.

Pokemon Oc’s

Millie Bolton - Pokemon

From Galar, her Pokemon partner is a Kantonian Meowth named Whiskers.

The extremely excitable wild child born to wooloo shepard parents. They live on a farm just outside of a town, and they sell wool to a popular textile company in Wyndon. Millie is an only child.

Whiskers is her partner, but the Pokemon that is her ace is the Wooloo who she grew up beside on the farm.

Millie’s dream is to become a champion level trainer, and to see all of Galar (and maybe even beyond) due to growing up in such a small hometown. Always looking for new adventures.

Will turn everything into a competition.

Can cook but spends hours gathering berries only to fall asleep right after.

Team: Whiskers, Wooloo, Impidimp, Grookey, Munchlax

Aedan Cavanaugh - Pokemon

From Galar, his Pokemon Partner is a Polteageist named Chamomile

The son of tea merchants. His family lives above his late grandmother’s tea shop, though his mother has long since expanded the business into a small chain of cafes and commercially sold tea blends.

Met Polteageist as a Sinistea after his grandmother’s funeral, and it evolved when he accidentally chipped his grandmother’s favorite antique tea pot.

Aedan is participating in the Gym Challenges to test himself to see how far he and his team can really go.

He’s still figuring out what kind of Pokemon Trainer he wants to be.

He spends a lot of time in battle cafes and expanding his currydex.

Very much wants to evolve a Matcha Cream Alcremie

Team: Chamomile, Vanillish, Swovet, Darumaka, Sobble

Fandomless Oc’s

Liz Ruin / Fandomless

Has verses for Yugioh, Pokemon, and BNHA.

Liz lived in japan with her parents, before they were promoted, and their jobs took them away from home.

She spent a few years in america with her grandfather on her mother’s side and her cousin in their game shop. Eventually Liz would move back to japan, but she visits her grandfather every summer.

Liz has the psychic ability to view the future in her dreams, usually in confusing, sporadic bursts that she can’t quite make any sense of when she wakes up. While awake, she gets bursts of what she calls her “shitty spidey sense” where she’ll know when something is about to happen near her, but not what.

It could be anything from ‘life threatening accident’ to ‘someone is goanna burn their mouth on their coffee’ and she has no way of telling these feelings apart. In her BNHA verse, this is also her quirk, and its official name would be “Precognition”.

Liz is the biggest bi to ever bi, with a strong lean towards cute girls, and seems almost exclusively attracted to boys who are lowkey dumbasses.

If you’ve earned her loyalty, you’ve earned it for life. Also, perhaps a touch more violent than you expect a four foot eight inches tall cute girl to be at first glance.

Eeriee McLaughlin / Fandomless

Her older brother went missing a year ago, and she’s the only one who hasn’t given up searching for him.

She took a jacket from his room that turned out to be a wolf pelt, now she’s a werewolf and will use her supernatural powers to find her brother. Somehow. She isn’t sure how that will work yet.

Her mom is the mayor of the town.

There’s a lot of weird stuff in Angel Hollow (the town) that she hadn’t noticed before becoming one of the weird things herself.

Her new friend Florance is the son of the investigator her mom hired to find her brother, and they’re both incorrigible snoops.

Convinced the weird stuff in town will lead her to her brother.

Hugo Nystrom / Tangled OC

An orphan from Ingvarr whose parents were deeply, deeply in debt when he was born, and when they died, a very young Hugo had to take up paying that debt.

Worked in factories and that's what started his fascination with technology and alchemy. Ended up having to steal to survive because the debt collectors took everything he made.

Donella owned the factory he was working in and when he started stealing small parts for his experiments, she noticed, ended up working for her that way. Ironically, being a full-time criminal was an upgrade.

Science is his one true love but he will absolutely dabble in magic if he thinks it’ll help make his alchemical solutions better. He just kind of throws vials at people like moltov cocktails.

Only a year older then Varian, two years max.

He’s never had real friends before and watching him flounder as he realizes people actually like and want him around for no other reason then they just like having him around is one of life’s greatest joys.

[actualbird]

// very vague and unspecific spoilers for basically everybody’s stories everywhere, specific spoilers maybe in linked analyses, obligatory disclaimer that these are just my own opinions and interpretations

character analysis: the nxx boys and “bad things”

okay so ive made a chart and it’s gonna look like A Lot but i swear i can explain myself fully if you read to the end

this chart is visualizing what each nxx boys’ tendencies, behaviors, and actions seem to lead back to.

on the left side, we have vyn and marius. 

i havent played too many of vyn’s stories, but thanks to some discussion with my friend kathleen @miladymiss​, somebody who HAS played a bunch of vyn’s stories, ive come to the vague conclusion that vyn has this general perception and belief that the world is cruel. he has an expectation that everybody has some kind of ulterior motive, that people will cast out those who are not in accordance with the mainstream, that people will hurt others. he does not want bad things to happen to him mostly because he expects that bad things will happen. to counter this, he leverages himself into a place of control more often than not (link leads to a prev vyn theory i wrote about this). 

marius on the other hand seems be the opposite in the sense that it’s actually his hope that people can/will be good that gets him into hot water. he employs facades and acts to protect himself from bad things happening to him (link leads to a prev marius analysis i wrote about this), because lol that actually has already happened a bunch, and yet he still has some a belief that people can change, something that makes him go to many lengths to try and prove.  if vyn expects that bad things will happen, marius does too, but marius, deep down, still wants to be wrong about that. to counter the danger his hope may cause, he puts up walls to mask his sincerity and true self.

vyn actively puts himself in control so that bad things do not happen to him. marius passively protects himself with his masks so that if bad things do happen to him, he’ll get out of it somewhat unscathed (or at least thats what he hopes, rip king). vyn is taking charge while marius is taking precautions.

but i want to immediately nix the thought of “i do not want bad things happening to me” being a purely selfish desire, because this desire, when pushed by friendship and/or love for another person, branches out into “i do not want bad things happening to you.” that’s pretty damn selfless! it’s protective! vyn and marius caring about another person would be them thinking something along the lines of “dont be too trusting, that will only get you hurt.”

now on the right side, we’ve got luke and artem

let me go to artem first (because i want to save my ultimate fave for last HAHA). the thing about artem and the “bad things” he doesnt want to do is that it manifests in the form of failure. ive said in a bunch of posts (cant link them bc theyre scattered over several posts hhh) that my vague conclusion on artem is that he holds himself to a merciless and meticulous standard because his life has been all about earning things, and the only way to earn things (sometimes things that do not need to be earned, like...happiness, artem, u good???), is to work tirelessly for those things. artem is scared of being underserving, and if he underserving, if he fails, he is a committing a sort of passive “bad thing” to those around him. 

luke, on the other hand, is in my opinion, frigging nuts. ive written an analysis on how luke perceives his existence and effect on other people’s lives as an inevitable negative. in this analysis, there is no “if i fail,” like artem. to luke, he thinks he’s already done it. and it’s not that he’s failed, it’s that he’s a bad thing completely (or at least a bad thing waiting to happen, and for him, thats fucking close enough). luke is both simultaneously scared of not being good and resigned that he is not good. he thus thinks that almost all of his desires are selfish and/or greedy somehow, because hey, im bad, why do i get to even want the rewards of being loved, thats not right! to luke, he is actively committing a “bad thing” to those around him at every given moment of his current life.

artem passively stops himself from being a bad thing by repressing aspects of himself he thinks to be faulty and/or not perfect (most of the time, emotions) to protect those around him. luke actively stops himself from being bad thing by putting the lives/desires of others above his own life/desires as some kind of penance for the people around him. 

now i want to immediately nix the thought that “i do not want to do bad things to others” as a purely selfless desire. it looks like that at first, but when this concept is pushed by friendship/love onto another person, it branches out into “i do not want to do bad things to you.” which, sure, is noble, but is also very focused on the self, on wanting to control the self and self’s effect on other people’s lives.

vyn and marius are worried about the threats from the outside while artem and luke are worried about the threats coming from themselves. all of them have their specific ways of dealing with this worry. all of them have their pros and cons, their strengths and weaknesses, but damn.

doesnt it feel great to see it all compared and contrasted on a chart???

....or is that just me HAHA

[el-moscorrofio-y-el-mercachifle]

Calderón AU— Part 5

Same warnings as ever! You can find all the ptevious parts by clickling the "Calderón AU" tag!💕

((Good lord i hate me cuz i have finally found the draft for the Calderon AU i did like three months ago and I missed A BIG STEP. I hate me for this. Imma pretend I did it on purpose and add it here lol))

“En realidad, Betty, usted me gusta mucho,” says Mr. Mario, still standing at the other side of her desk, in the dim light of the her desklamp. There is a slight, soft smile on his face, but his eyes are dark under the little light of the suffocating room.

Needless to say, Betty is speechless.

It is quiet obvious, when she thinks about it later that day, because what other reason would a man have to keep bringing her gifts like these?

In any case, right now, Betty is shocked in silence. Mr. Mario chuckles lightly, in a way that any other woman would have found charming, before speaking again.

He says he can see she’s surprised, and he gets it; it was a shock for him too when he first realized. It was strange to imagine a man like him being actually in love.

It probably didn’t help, either, that he actively made efforts to hide his feelings, he says. He just… didn’t know what to do or how to act, he says to Betty.

Truth is, the “i didn’t know how to handle my long-held feelings so I hid them” is actually a good excuse Mario has used a few times when suddenly he got interested in a specific woman that before didn’t catch his attention enough. Play it off as a “i was just repressing my feelings, that’s why you didn’t notice. I was actively trying to hide them”

This is a tricky technique, 50 50 chances of working… but due to Betty’s (presumed) inexperience, Mario thinks it will work.

He’s not totally wrong, but also, not right, either. Betty’s just confused.

He can see that, so he continues: “perdóneme, Betty, si la tomé por sorpresa, es sólo que… no quería sefuir ocultándoselo. De verdad, usted me gusta mucho.”

Betty at this point realises that she probably needs to say something, and so, she lets out a nervous laugh, and stops looking at him as she answers. Yeah, she’s surprised, she says. She would have neber guessed and…

And… what? Calderón realizes Betty doesn’t know what to say. Clear indication it is not reciprocrated. Okay, then. Let’s go smoother.

“Yo entiendo que esto fue muy repentino, Betty pero… por favor, déjeme demostrarle que le digo la verdad. Permítame llevarla a su casa.”

Betty immediately rejects the idea, but Calderón takes it as a sign of absolutely bothersome modesty, because this a-hole of a man cannot comprehend the idea that a an ugly woman truthfully rejects his advances.

He is quickly coming to realize just how annoying her stubborness is, but his annoyance is well hidden under his prince charming's facade. It's not the first time he's dealt with way too modest women, after all.

Truth is, obviously, that Betty isn't being modest. She genuinely doesn't want mr Mario to drive her home.

Somehow, he ends up winning at the end. Betty's only request is that they wait a little before going out together because, apparently, she still has stuff to do. Mario assumes this is because of Armando, and he's right about it, but pretends he doesn't know and agrees

It's better for him that way. He trully doesn't want to be seen with murcielaguín.

By the time they leave, Armando (and the rest of the ppl, but Armando is the only one who actually matters to betty, Mario thinks) has already left Ecomoda.

The car ride is awkward for Betty, starting with how Mr. Mario opened the door for her. It is a nice gesture, very gentlemanly, but she can't stop thinking how she wishes it were Mr. Armando who did it.

During the ride, Mr. Mario tries to make conversation and eventually gets Betty to talk more than in simple short sentences.

For Mario this is all very annoying. It's not hard or awkward, just boring. There is no fun in the chase if you don't really want to catch the prey.

It's all the standard questions: how did your day go, what do you think about X, do you like Y. No real chemistry anywhere, but Betty wants to think, eventually, that it's at least a sort of naturallly flowing convo. He even let her choose the music, she thinks to herself trying to be positive in a very uncomfortable situation.

Once they reach Betty's house, Mario stops in front of her house and turns to look at her. He asks for forgiveness if he's pressuring her, and says that he can feel her uncomfort. He asks if they can be friends.

Betty reluctantly agrees

Mario smiles as softly as he can and tells her that, if she doesn't mind, he could continue to drive her home at night

"Yo sé que usted es una persona muy privada, Betty, y no me gustaría incomodarla poniendo su vida privada al aire. Si gusta, podemos repetir lo de hoy y esperar a que se vaya la gente para salir," suggests Mario, praying that she accepts. He doesn't wanna be seen with Mostrichátala and scare away all the beautiful models or ruin his record. "Se lo digo para evitar rumores o malos entendidos con otras personas, Betty, nada más."

Betty of course, agrees. She doesn't rwally want to be driven home, but Mr. Mario looks so insistent, and she knows he's her boss's best friend, and on top of that, the Vice President. She feels obligated to say yes, so that's what she does. She tries to tell herself that keeping him as a friend is not a compromise.

Don Mario once again tries to open the door, but Betty refuses, fearing that her father can see them.

"No, don Mario, no se moleste," she says, "es que mi papá podría estar viendo y no quisiera que lo malinterpretara."

Mario insists (and good lord, he's so fucking tired of begging this woman for everything), saying that there is nothing wrong with this, but Betty, this time, doesn't concede. When it comes to her dad and his image of her, Betty is much more adamant. Mario notices this, and saves this knowledge for later

Mario waits until she goes inside before driving off.

Now, this whole thing may sound very similar to how it was with Armando in the show, but it's not really. Armando was evidently tense, awkward, and just internally screaming that he didn't want to be there. The car rides were filled with tense silences. Mario is none of this things, and the car ride was filled with falsely enthusiastic conversation and soft jazz music. He is lying completely, but he's not awkward or tense about it. Anyone who saw him would absolutelt believe he's fine, calm, happy, and mote importantly, genuinely interested in Betty.

He knows Betty is smart and he needs to put up an absoljtely perfect show, or otherwise, she'll notice something's off.

Good Lord, how exhausting. No wonder Armado didn't want to do it!

Sooo! Here it is! Finally part 5! Sorry it took so long haha what do you think about this part and the developments it's taking?? Please comment and share🥰🥰