#him taking on this guiding mentorship role and seeing them for what they are and choosing to trust them and support them

[thelonelywhale]

No you don't understand how important it is to me that Caleb and Essek have this soft, deep, profound love for each other. These two people who were so broken and saw themselves as so damaged and irredeemable and utterly damned, having the chance to heal together and cultivate this sweet, gentle relationship with each other. The fact that they can now carve out moments of joy together, that they proved you can change and better yourself, with time and effort and love.

Matt taking the time to show that even in just a few little ways, to let Essek express his love so casually and with so much reverence and care is just AUGH. That's how you do redemption arcs. He understood the assignment. That's not only respecting the players for the time they put in to creating these characters and their pathways for growth, but also saying to your players (and viewers), "it's possible. Everyone deserves a second chance at happiness."

They redeemed themselves, together.

[suchine-toki]

(A Totally Serious) Gintama Dads Tier List

Why does this series have so many dads help-

S

Isaburo: Despite his outwardly stern demeanor, he understands Nobume's past traumas and helps her cope with them, while also educating her on the harsh realities they face. He named her after his deceased daughter and cared for her as such, even texting her frequently and buying her donuts.

A

Shouyo: He's a father figure for several characters in the series, demonstrating unwavering love and acceptance, and provided a supportive environment for them to grow. His memory and teachings remain a guiding force for his students. Reason for losing points: He left his kids concussed and dumb.

Gintoki: He consistently shows protectiveness towards Kagura and Shinpachi, often putting their safety and well-being above his own. He's playful with them, teaches them important life lessons, and accepts them unconditionally. Despite his flaws, Kagura and Shinpachi love him very much. Reason for losing points: Has several mental health issues and his feet stink.

Zenzou's dad: He became a father figure to many children as he taught ninja arts and played kick the can with them. Many of his students attended his funeral, showing how loved he was. Reason for losing points: Sold Zenzou's JUMP collection to buy p*rn.

Matsugorou: Also known as Musashi, he's Ikumatsu's dad. It's shown that despite their poverty they were very happy together, until he lost his memory trying to save a boy from drowning. He saves her daughter and reconnects with her. Reason for losing points: He wears a jacket and fundoshi.

B

Jirochou: He abandoned his daughter Pirako because he felt compelled to protect what his friend Tatsugorou left behind after he died. His subsequent actions reflect a desire for redemption and a willingness to spend more time with her. Reason for losing points: Was too chicken to have a threesome with Tatsugorou and Otose.

Abuto: He's not the stepdad, he's the dad that stepped up. Although he's not exactly a parental figure to Kamui, he has been by his side since he was a kid and cares about him a lot. Kamui was even shown to hesitate attacking him. Reason for losing points: He's losing his will to live.

C

Shimura Ken: Not much is known about him, only that he died leaving Tae and Shinpachi with a huge debt. Although he cannot be blamed for dying from an illness, he didn't take any measures to prevent his children from suffering because of him. Reason for losing points: His name is a parody of a comedy actor.

Koshinori: Since the heir of the Yagyuu clan had to be a man, instead of changing the rules, he forced Kyuubei to conform to that identity. He later decides to let her live as she sees fit. Reason for losing points: His height is 122 cm (4'0").

Umibouzu: He has a complex relationship with Kamui and Kagura. His absence leaves a void in their lives and creates feelings of abandonment, even if he'd reasons to do so. His two children ended up finding substitute father figures elsewhere. Reason for losing points: Stopped a 3 day fight to take a dump.

D aka Betrayed their students tier

Jiraia: He takes on the role of Tsukuyo's mentor and trainer, but his influence extended beyond that, manipulating her emotions and exploiting her vulnerabilities. Their relationship becomes increasingly abusive and toxic until she breaks free of it. Reason for losing points: Bad skincare habits.

Utsuro: Despite his mentorship role, he manipulates his students' emotions and desires for his own ends, creating emotional turmoil within them as they uncover his true intentions and the extent of his malevolence. Reason for losing points: His existence.

[haydenigmatic]

What does Basilius think of each of his siblings?

let's see as for now, cause remember things change with the years 👀😈

Drystan: Him and Dryston share a complex relationship that involves both sibling rivalry and brotherly affection. As the second-born, Drystan is always close at Basilius's heels, vying for attention and recognition. While Bas sometimes feels a sense of competition with his younger brother, he also admires his determination and tenacity. Despite the rivalry, there is an unbreakable bond between them, and Bas feels a sense of responsibility towards Drystan as the future king and older brother.

The Twins: With a significant age gap, Basilius views the twins with a mix of protectiveness and gentle amusement. He often sees them as young, innocent souls, and he takes on a mentorship role in their lives. He cherishes their childlike wonder and pure hearts, and he enjoys spending time with them, engaging in playful activities and storytelling. He hopes to guide the twins on their journey to becoming noble individuals and often finds himself acting as a shield between them and the pressures of royal life.

He'll try to be a good older brother

[ankhisms]

gobus rewatch ep 6 thoughts

ive mentioned many times before that i adore the way the mecha and mecha fights are set up in gobusters, theyre genuinely my favorite mecha set up in any sentai ive watched. i remember in the behind the making of the first ep video the fight choreo director talked about how he wanted each fight to be dynamic and to not be boring, which they honestly achieved really well. ill be honest im one of those toku fans who will zone out during the mecha fight portion of episodes (if the show has a mecha fight) but gobusters was never like that for me. similarly to wizard and blazar i always felt engaged in its fights and they were never boring to me, including the mecha fights. this is in part to the world building and the writing of the show, where the mecha have to undergo a lot of maintenance and we see those mecha workers regularly. the show takes pains to make sure we as the audience are aware that the fight could not be possible with just one person, it takes a whole large team of people working together to be able to fight.

with that in mind i also really love how the trio arent just able to form their combined mecha super easily, we see the three of them going through training simulations and theyve failed over 20 times according to nick. i love the little details in the pilot cockpit, the keypad and controls and codes they have to press in order to perform certain actions, along with them having to take their fuel usage into account. from a character and dynamic perspective, this is good early on because we get the sense that while hiromu has joined the team and hes getting to know youko & ryuuji and we see that theyre generally getting along, hiromu is still not entirely in sync with his teammates. hes frustrated and stubborn, hes gone through these simulations and training sequences with nick presumably hundreds of times before meeting up with the other two at the beginning of the show. he KNOWS hes capable, so whats going on? he did fine when he did it on his own.

i enjoyed ryuuji and hiromus dynamic in this episode. ryuuji, unsuprisingly, very easily slips into a brotherly mentor role to hiromu- but its clearly a different kind of mentorship than how ryuuji would approach guiding youko through something. this episode really highlights just how stubborn hiromu is, he focuses on something and doesnt give up until he solves it and isnt very receptive to being given advice on doing a task differently. and ryuuji, having spent so many years raising another stubborn and strong willed person (youko) is able to percieve this about hiromu and knows that he cant just flat out tell hiromu what hes doing wrong. hes got to be able to work it out himself. but he still is gently nudging hiromu towards the answer while supporting him. we get a sense early on in the episode that hiromu feels a bit tense about ryuuji calling off their training session, as if hes wondering if ryuuji thinks that hiromu just isnt capable enough- but thats not the case at all. ryuuji has probably seen youko get frustrated to the point of needing to walk away from something, and as the eldest of the team he decides to step in before either of the younger two get too frustrated or end up burnt out.

also a note. i dont plan on sacrificing myself for you. oh the early show late show forshadowing irony

the crux of the issue is that hiromu has been training all by himself for 13 years, whereas youko and ryuuji have always trained with each other. hiromu still believes he has to do everything by himself, and subconciously believes that he can only fully trust himself. because of this he hasnt been allowing ryuuji and youko to take the lead and do their parts while he stands back for a moment, he hasnt allowed himself to trust them enough for there to be a proper give and take in their team. and thats not because hiromu doesnt like youko and ryuuji, its just something that he hasnt thought of this entire time. when youve worked and trained alone for your entire life, its jarring to realize that you have people you can rely on and trust.

in the end its another sweet moment and good building of the team, they have to work hard to achieve their goal and they each have different strengths and weaknesses, and hiromu has to realize that he needs to trust his teammates just as they trust him in order for them to survive.

[kerra-and-company]

If you're still taking the impressions ask, how about Eir 👀

Eir ask time! Like at least a week late, but here ya go and ty! :D First impression I liked her pretty early on, as soon as I played through the PS on Kerra, but since Kerra is sylvari and I didn't do the dungeons till I figured out how to use LFG, I also didn't know much about her. So...respect and "I like you" but more on a distant acquaintance level, I guess! Impression now A leader who tried her best and carried a lot on her shoulders. She knows/knew a lot but not everything, and she was aware of how much she didn't know. I'm really glad Destiny's Edge had her for the time that they did, and I'm glad that I got to play through the norn PS so I could properly appreciate her. Favorite moment Honestly, a lot of the early mentorship for the norn PS makes me very happy. The norn Commander is a kid trying to build their legend and learn about the world, and she's trying to guide them while being proud and dealing with several layers of responsibility and guilt on top of that, which gives me a lot of feelings knowing that extra context. For something that's just one moment...the fact that, IIRC, she tried to help Faolain run in Maguuma. It kills me, and it's such a "frog carrying the scorpion"-type moment (even though I have many feelings on that particular fable also). Idea for a story Anything where she lives. She unfortunately doesn't in my main canon, but I'm currently trying to think through a version where she does, and I might post it eventually if I'm happy with it! Aside from that, I'm a sucker for backstory, so reading about baby Eir prior to the Destiny's Edge book, even, would be very fun. Unpopular opinion I understand and respect both her and Braham's "sides" of their relationship. He feels abandoned by her and angry, but once he really gets to know her, he cares (because he's Braham, of course he does), and he has to fully come to terms with what their relationship was and was not when he loses her. She wanted to make a legend for herself and made the deliberate choice not to take the role of a parent, even though she cared about her son. And even though she does welcome him back and want to get to know him later on, she's also fully aware of what their relationship is and isn't. It's a complicated weave but I respect and care about both of them here. Neither of them should be demonized. Favorite relationship Her and Braham (for the aforementioned reasons) or her and Zojja (because that's maybe the friendship that cracked the most with Snaff's death, and I would love/have loved to see them interact more after Destiny's Edge officially reunited). Favorite headcanon Man, I just don't have enough headcanons for people, do I? Again, sending this out to all y'all--if you have any Eir headcanons you would really like to share, please send them my way! :)

[sepublic]

King and Eda as Teachers

           Another thing I find fascinating about King and Eda’s dynamic, in addition to one being fetishized while the other is demonized, and neither quite gets how the other feels from that until later;

           But King and Eda are BOTH great teachers, in their own right? And I think that’s interesting because of TOH’s discussion about learning, students, and teachers in general, but just like Eda and Luz, King has a fascinating relationship with education! He’s deeply interested in demons, he’s quite an artistic person, a bit of a writer and artist in his own right; And we see in The First Day that he actually likes to teach people! He’s a good teacher, no less! Sure, he initially views his position as one whose authority he’ll abuse, but by the end of the day, the kids seem genuinely fond of him…

           Which, gets me to my point; Eda is more adept at an interpersonal, close, one-on-one kind of mentorship; The kind where she guides an apprentice through life lessons, and helps them learn. Really gets to connect with an individual as a person, be a guardian for them, while also learning from this kid, on equal standing with plenty of mutual respect really; And of course adapting to this individual’s needs and unique accommodations, a reactive type of curriculum that changes to fit the apprentice and encourages them to express themselves.

           Then, you have King, who clearly has a lot more comfort with a detached, authority role for a larger group, because teaching is a leadership role for him. Directing and commanding them on what to do, while having more of an emphasis on straightforward academics as his lessons, a conventional teacher. He could probably write a textbook, while for Eda, that sort of stuff might remind her too much of the ‘pointless busywork’ of regular school. King’s teaching is directed across a larger group and demands conformity and to be standardized, to really unite different people together for a common goal.

           And, that’s SO fascinating to me! It’s not something one thinks of about a lot, but there ARE different ways of being teachers, irrespective of the subject! Some people do one-on-one lessons and form emotional bonds, while others are pragmatic and spread across a larger group, in and out you go; But they both still CARE, because King clearly cares for people! He sometimes struggles to, but fundamentally, he tries, and the students clearly seem fond of him for it.

           King’s pretty interested in teaching as well- Obviously he likes the opportunity to be listened to and trusted on subject matter, to talk about his own interests, to have someone be his friend through Luz, he says this more-or-less in The Intruder… We see him challenge Eda over teaching Luz, and it’s not just a one-off incident, he continues this desire into The Intruder as well. And it’s not like King starts off as a great teacher- Like Eda, who’s also beginning to realize her issues in I was a Teenage Abomination, King obviously begins to realize that leading and teaching others isn’t as simple as it seems.

          With the baby Trash Slug, King defaults to just mindlessly throwing snacks and rewards at the slug, spoiling it until he runs out. Conversely in Adventures in the Elements, he focuses too much on being harsh with Private New Guy, and ends up inciting a rebellion in the process. King is clearly used to keeping his teaching position as a purely pragmatic sort of thing across people. With Luz, King learns to really step up to that teaching role of responsibility when he takes accountability for his mistakes in taking Eda’s elixir, admitting that he’s not the perfect teacher, and is given the chance to really shine in his own instruction for once, to have someone listen!

          King begins to understand what kids her age kind of look for and want to see, they like to learn stuff that relates to them or feels relevant; King is ALSO learning to provide as a teacher, that it’s not just about him, but it’s about the students as well. And as Luz showed him, what King has to teach, what he has to say, DOES have value, that people can find interest and meaning in it. King learns to compromise, especially in Sense and Insensitivity, that he can’t overcompensate for this lack of feeling in control, by being too controlling and taking all of the attention, and prioritizing himself; He has to consider others as well.

          King can’t be too easy, but he can’t be too harsh as well, and students have a curiosity for things that needs to be nurtured; Which, culminates nicely in King being a decent teacher in The First Day. King establishes his authority, but otherwise strikes up a good rapport with the kids, and teaches them stuff that, as one student remarks, is actually applicable to their lives and thus interesting and relevant to them. Obviously he’s projecting a bit, but King also does have that added understanding of teens thanks to his time in Luz’s body; And as I said, Luz showed King that what he has to teach and offer IS valuable, that kids like her can enjoy and treasure it.

          That encourages King to really put himself out there and respond to what his class wants, because he has a better idea of that now. King can better communicate and sell what he finds interesting to his audience now, and get others to be interested and listen; And during Grom, he definitely steps up more as someone who speaks to a large audience, and understands them enough to be confident with what he puts out by appealing to the kids’ sensibilities, such as their support for the Hexside Banshees. King believes in what he has to say and offer, and doesn’t let himself get discouraged from the first few failures, instead learning from them; And a teacher who can still learn, sometimes from their students, is something that Eda also becomes herself!

           And all of these revelations are a lot of fun, because I think King’s more detached, impersonal teaching methods, adaptable across a wider range of students, with less of an emotional bond for each one; It reminds me of Lilith, and how her and Amity are professional, how she’s always been reserved because of those Emperor’s Coven values; The strait-laced, conventional teacher. The one with multiple students besides Amity, but they don’t matter much to her… And obviously, King contrasts in that he seems to be a more compassionate person than Lilith (and wasn’t trained to be cold by the Emperor’s Coven);

           But it just adds to King and Lilith being so very similar in a lot of ways to me… And again, I think it’s a very nuanced commentary on education and what it means to be a teacher as a whole. About how people learn, how they store information; King likes to write things down, while Eda is likely a visual learner like Luz… Dana Terrace stated herself to be a visual learner, and obviously a lot of her own experience comes into Eda as well, and not just Luz!

          King stores his knowledge and organizes with books (he has a bunch about demons), while Eda and Luz are much more visual, unconventional people- It’s a lot of fun and really adds to the dynamic, that the core trio has their various ways of interacting with the concept of education, teaching, and learning as a whole, ways that sometimes contrast, sometimes overlap. We even see that King isn’t too shabby on visuals, either; He likes to draw and is interested in the pictures from Luz’s Azura books, and when he first tries to teach Luz, he DOES set up a diagram with plenty of visuals!

           I think it’s a neat detail; How King’s methodology of teaching fits his royal motifs, how he wants power and control… But how he still adapts to give people space and autonomy. A more conventional teacher who aces it at Hexside without any training whatsoever, visual and textual, while Eda and Luz are mostly visual- Although Luz DOES love to read her books and write fanfiction, so she’s likely got some textual leanings towards academia as well! That makes her a neat balance between Eda and King in some ways, susceptible to both, as Luz learns from King about demons in The Intruder, and from Eda in general.

           And, it provides ways for them to bond… King can draw, and he enjoys doing it for the sake of art; Him and Luz get along a lot in those Owl Pellet shorts, and he has fun with illustrations, both making his own for his demon lessons, but also enjoying the ones from Luz’s books. And, Luz is a visual learner, probably like Eda; Eda doesn’t quite get the artistic stuff as much, but they do bond over glyphs, especially now that Eda REALLY needs to use them! And it occurred to me, but it might be difficult for Lilith to adapt to Luz’s more impromptu teaching style…

           Which, suddenly makes me imagine her having an easier time learning from KING, who as I said provides that structure and authority she’s used to, except King isn’t downright terrible (well not always), and he’s also a reader himself. Technically I think Eda is also a reader, as at one point she DOES allude to taking a good break from her adventure with Lilith by getting down to a good book; But then again, she also dismisses the Book Fair, so it might’ve just been an inside joke about that whole mess from earlier. Then you have Lilith, whose deleted-scene bedroom has a stack of books… A few about curses, but others mostly just regular literature;

           Combined with her more ‘nerdy’ look with the big round glasses that she once had… And, I wouldn’t be surprised if Lilith was better at reading and that kind of textbook studying, compared to Eda. If that led to their differences as students, made it easier for Lilith to behave, and also work with Amity, who’s ALSO a pretty conventional and straightforward learner, and an avid reader; She hangs out at the library a lot, possibly not just for academics and to avoid her family. It’s practically canon that she loves teaching, after all!

           So for all we know, we might get Lilith learning from KING, getting to understand demons, and figuring out how to respect him more through this; And who knows, we could even see Amity learn from King, and hopefully Eda and Luz, that’d be really neat as well! And we could see Luz learn to be a teacher in her own right, potentially alongside Amity, who might have some guidance of her own… And they BOTH learn to be teachers and self-actualize in that sort of way! It’d be a neat passing-of-the-torch motif, how Eda and Lilith teach Luz and Amity… And they grow up to teach other kids as well!

[catncore]

!      /         @the-composer​ send me “!” for hanekoma to write a report on your muse.

There  are  few  reports  I  have  written  in  which  I  have  felt  the  need  to  stall  writing  them.  It  is  not  for  lack  of  not  having  information,  rather  it  is  the  fact  that  I  have  so  much  that  I  do  not  know  where  to  begin.  My  Composer,  Yoshiya  Kiryu,  is  at  the  center  of  this  subject,  which  adds  a  layer  of  complication.  I  will  record  my  feelings  at  the  moment.  I  pray  this  report  does  not  end  up  in  his  care  in  the  future.  

There  is  a  separation  between  the  Composer  as  an  entity  of  the  UnderGround,  and  as  Yoshiya  Kiryu.  While  it  is  important  to  see  them  as  one  being,  I  have  found  that  in  my  continuous  exposure  to  him,  that  there  are  multiple  sides  to  this.  It’s  less  a  coin  and  more  of  a  six  sided  dice.  Whatever  it  lands  on  is  the  dominant  ‘self’  for  a  set  amount  of  time  before  he  decides  to  roll  it  again.  What  it  lands  on  is  anyone's  guess.  

As  Composer,  he  is  single  handedly  the  most  proficient  and  exceptional  human  to  have  ever  been  raised  to  take  the  position.  It  is  rare  for  such  beings  to  be  human  raised  and  have  such  a  gasp  on  the  UG  in  the  sense  that  the  Composer  has.  Is  it  because  Shibuya  guides  his  hand  or  is  it  from  my  own  mentorship?  Plausibility  aside,  he  is  well  aware  of  the  fact  he  is  responsible  for  Shibuya’s  growth  (and  at  one  point  stagnation)  that  he  will  use  it  as  a  card  of  status.  When  challenged  or  threatened,  the  Composer  is  not  shy  to  display  his  power.  

His  connections  to  those  he  had  exposed  himself  to  is  very  different  as  Composer  than  it  is  when  he  strips  away  the  title  leaving  the  human  under  it-  though  it  is  arguable  if  you  could  call  him  a  human  anymore.  Human  beings  do  not  simply  go  back  to  being  ‘themselves’  from  being  Composer.  He  grew  and  adapted  to  a  world  that  most  will  never  see.  Because  of  this,  there  is  a  clear  God  Complex  that  has  grown  from  him  where  he  believes  his  word  is  final. 

I  find  this  to  be  all  bravado  and  peacocking,  even  if  the  threat  is  very  real.  In  most  circumstances,  he  will  not  act  unless  he  feels  threatened.  Not  many  things  usher  that  response,  aside  from  a  cheap  thrill  (  read: minamimoto  )    .

The  man  he  is  around  Neku  Sakuraba  is  different  from  the  man  he  is  when  alone  with  me.  Even  as  Composer,  while  he  feels  the  need  to  remind  his  Producers  that  he  is  the  end  all  be  all,  he  does  search  for  our  approval.  My  Co-Producer  and  other  self,  Eanas  has  no  problem  challenging  him  on  this  fact.  There  is  also  an  underlying  rivalry  between  them  that  while  softened  over  the  year  since  our  changed  circumstances,  is  still  there.  

It  is  completely  harmless  and  I  do  not  suspect  it  will  ever  truly  go  away.

It’s  when  he  has  stepped  out  of  the  Room  of  Reckoning  and  chooses  to  indulge  in  more  of  the  world  around  him  that  there  are  tell  signs  of  the  person  he  was  before  he  took  up  the  pillar  of  the  Reapers  Game.  As  much  as  he  wants  to  believe  that  he  has  changed  from  that  person,  paired  with  the  deep  need  to  be  revered;  he  also  craves  protection  and  acknowledgement  that  he  would  have  otherwise  gotten  in  his  life  spent  in  the  Real  Ground.  

My  relationship  with  this  ‘self’  is  complicated.  While  I  have  taken  steps  to  distance  myself  from  the  Higher  Plane,  I  do  have  rules  as  Producer  that  are  required  for  a  professional  relationship  and  yet  i  have  subsequently  failed  to  follow  through  on.  I  understand  fully  that  Producers  are  prohibited  from  forming  connections  and  bonds  with  their  Composers  seeing  as  the  role  they  uptake  is  fluid.  Composers  at  most  last  a  decade  if  they  are  skilled,  and  I  as  it’s  reigning  Producer  should  document  and  only  follow  orders,  yet  if  this  human  found  himself  in  harm's  way  in  a  way  that  I  could  not  control,  I  would  not  hesitate  to  step  in  and  protect  him.  

Needless  to  say,  I  have  failed  in  being  nonpartial. 

I  have  gone  into  note  of  this  in  the  past.  What  has  changed  is  that  the  lines  have  blurred  and  where  I  should  have  kept  it  at  mentorship  has  developed  into  something  akkined  to  strong  affection.  One  could  call  it  Love.  He  sought  my  companionship  in  ways  that  while  morally  responsible  to  the  Higher  Plane,  was  natural  to  humans  and  what  he  knows.  As  an  angel,  I  may  not  entirely  understand  it  but  I  do  desire  his  happiness.  His  happiness  in  himself  and  as  Composer,  for  if  he  is  happy  that  energy  will  also  be  put  out  into  the  city  and  yield  positive  results.  

I  will  stay  with  him.  Even  if  it  costs  me  status  and  authoritative  sway  in  the  Higher  Plane,  I  will  stay  with  him.  Be  it  though  his  position  as  Composer  or  into  whatever  status  he  raises  to  take,  I  will  stay  at  his  side.  He  is  my  human  and  his  happiness,  as  it  does  for  Shibuya  is  also  my  happiness.  

It  may  sound  odd,  and  I  am  surely  to  be  reprimanded  for  these  feelings,  but  that  will  not  change  the  fact  that  I  deep  down  we  would  have  reached  this  position  even  if  we  had  no  prior  exposure  to  each  other  before  he  took  up  his  role.  We  are  fixed  points  to  each  other.  If  he  wills  me  to  be  here,  who  am  I  to  deny  him  his  right.  

He  will  be  returning  soon,  so  I  will  close  this  report here  for  now.  I  will continue  once  he  has  gone  to  sleep.  I  need  to  start  dinner  so  he  will  not  wait  to  eat. 

[maxwell-grant]

On Lord Hawthorne

A lot of what makes Lavender Jack special to me is the way it’s so masterfully able to create engaging, modern material out of it’s influences, and it’s creation of a genuinely timeless pulp icon that I think should serve as the ideal baseline for any and all creators who want to create stories based on pulp characters, old and new alike, in the future. 

As I make my way through Season 2 and eagerly await Season 3 I’d like to take the time to talk a little about the often overlooked half of the villain duo of Season 1, Lord Hawthorne, and what I think is interesting about him. Out of the many ways pulp heroes have been reimagined into villains over the decades, Lord Hawthorne stands out to me as easily one of the best ones, as a thoughtful take on the Tarzan character.

Spoilers before the cut

The first thing everyone immediately picks about Lord Hawthorne is that he’s Tarzan, with hardly any ifs or buts about it. He’s Tarzan, and we quickly learn that he’s the villain, part of a villain duo with Lady Hawthorne, the real mastermind and kingpin in pearls behind the story’s events. Having Tarzan as the villain n a story that draws from pulp and Edwardian fiction is already an interesting start, as three of the most popular molds from which are pulp heroes are based on, three of the most popular characters as icons, are Tarzan, the Scarlet Pimpernel, and Sherlock Holmes, all three of which exist in some capacity in the world of Lavender Jack. The Gentleman Villain, The Great Detective, and The Wild Man.

Lavender Jack, as I’ve mentioned, is based on the Pimpernel, as well as other figures such as Spring-Heeled Jack and Bertie Wooster. Jack draws from icons that largely predate the pulp heroes because, in Schkade’s own reasoning, if you’re going to try and create an authentic pulp hero, it only makes sense to use as a base the characters that largely inspired them, and clearly that worked out very well. Jack is a Pimpernel remodeled and recontextualized into modern sensibilities, into an era of superheroes and webcomics.

In the Great Detective’s case, we have the figure of Madame Theresa Ferrier, who is called into the story by the Mayor to try and solve the mystery of Lavender Jack’s identity. Schkade describes Ferrier as a character that pulls from elements of detectives like Hercule Poirot and C.Auguste Dupin as well as Sherlock Holmes, in particular Jeremy Brett’s later year performances. As he describes:

In the series’ final years, Brett was getting older, sicker, hindered by bipolar medications that sapped his energy and caused him to gain weight, and he used it. His Holmes became a fading, melancholic shadow of his younger self, but with the spark of his brilliance showing through when it counted. I always found that so compelling

Ferrier is repeteadly described in-universe as “The Great Detective”, and she is both the oldest as well as the most brilliant character in the comic. Despite her age, despite her physical complications, and the tragedy that surrounds her love life, she is nonetheless incredibly skilled, strong and resourceful, able to unmask Jack and survive a confrontation with Lord Hawthorne and even nearly beat him. Ferrier draws from the Great Detectives of old, but this is a character that could never be mistaken for any of them. She’s not specifically based on any of them because, as Schkade puts it: “I wanted her to be someone I’d never get to draw in a leading role in most of my work-for-hire jobs��. 

Her role in the comic ends up being one of mentorship to Jack, and despite her age being emphasized as well as the idea of her belonging to an older generation of great heroes that now gives way to the younger and hot-blooded Jack as well as Ferrier’s new partner in Honoria Crabb, Ferrier is very much another great example of where the old meets the new in Lavender Jack. Pulling from the great old archetypes but very much recognizable as her own thing. 

Thing is, when it comes to Lord Hawthorne, we don’t really get that, because Lord Hawthorne isn’t really combining the idea of Tarzan with a splash of something new and outstanding and modern. He really is just Tarzan, and not a terribly layered character at that, for much of the story he’s largely just a voiceless bulldozer who exists to do the dirty work of Lady Hawthorne no matter how dirty. This isn’t at all a criticism, because I think Hawthorne being just Tarzan, with little to no bells and whistles and twists on it, is central to what makes him work not just as a great physical threat Jack must overcome (in a similar way to Bane as both a monstrous powerhouse and also having a strong connection to a powerful pulp hero), but also someone whose tragedy comes to light as we finally learn more about him. The fact that he is monosyllabic and largely devoid of any personal interests or life outside of being muscle for Lady Hawthorne is something deliberate, as outlined in a speech given by another character in Chapter 39

Her world's been changing for years, now. She's taking her place in a wider game. A more nuanced game. And you're still...Why, you're only good for one thing, aren't you? Well, maybe two, you old hound, you.

I know why you spend vast stretches of the year off in that jungle. It's not for sport, it's not to keep your edge...it's because when there's no need to fight, no struggle to win, no enemy...there's just...you.

And you know there's not really anything to you, underneath all those scars and muscles.

No dreams, no warmth, no depth. Nothing to love.

So you stay away...and that way, you can come when she calls you. You can sweep back to Gallery and show up all filthy and draw her into your powerful, savage embrace....and maintain your novelty.

All of this so you'll never have to endure a silent sunday afternoon where there's nothing to do, any no one to kill, and your lady simply...doesn't...need you.

You do know this word, don't you, Hawthorne, old fellow? "Novelty?"

And how does he respond?

Not with a denial, but an affirmation that this is ultimately all personhood amounts to, in his worldview. Just one more thing to be conquered and then used as a club to batter others with. 

The very act of a character questioning their own worth and depth of personality usually tends to be a telling sign that they, in fact, have those things even if they are out of touch with them, but Hawthorne doesn’t particularly rebuff anything Van Lund’s saying. He just reaffirms his title as Lord while threatening him with violence, because violence is all he knows. 

As we later learn, Lord Hawthorne isn’t, in fact, the real Lord Hawthorne, but instead he and his wife usurped the title from the real one as they escaped from the jungle, where he was only known as “the wild man”. A man who’s been forced his entire life to live in a kill-or-be-killed world, to live as an animal in constant conflict with humans, was then captured and then brutally tortured every day for over a month, and then found for the first time someone who treated him with something resembling affection, someone who ultimately turned him into a tool for her evil designs, and he readily accepts this because he has no life, no identity, outside of her. He doesn’t even know his own name.

In fact, for all we know, he might as well be John Clayton himself, except he was born in a world where being Tarzan is not the greatest thing ever and there was no Jane or ape mother to guide his malleable heart into something resembling good, and there was only Sarah to mold him into an instrument of murder at his lowest point.

I argue that Tarzan is a character that’s all about freedom and vitality, as a heroic take on an archetype that’s long been the missing link between superheroes and monsters, where the dual nature of mankind between person and ape acts not as a disorder or source of conflict but instead as the ultimate power fantasy in a character who gets the best of both with none of the downsides. Lord Hawthorne isn’t necessarily a return to form, because there is no dual nature to him. There is no gentleman, no Lord Greystoke descendant of nobility, romantic hero and great adventurer and leader of men and whatnot. There is only the ape, and what little façade has been grafted onto him by his master so he can pass off as a person, only long enough until he takes his shirt off and starts murdering people for her. While we get long extended close-ups of the icy cruelty in Lady Hawthorne’s eyes, there is none for Lord Hawthorne, because he is not cruel, he is an animal. He’s not a fighter, he’s a survivor. He lives to kill and serve the person who tells him who or what to kill. 

Lord Hawthorne is what happens when you strip the Tarzan legend of the romanticism of fiction and you look at it for what it would likely result in: the tragic story of a child forced to grow in the jungle, where the concept of personhood and human decency are utterly meaningless and there is only survival, where his existence is at odds with the worlds of man and animal alike, and what happens when that sort of being receives a first contact with something resembling decency and love. Even if said first contact wasn’t with someone as evil as Lady Hawthorne, there was little chance Lord Hawthorne’s life was ever going to be anything other than just an extension of his life in the jungle, or end in anything other than tragedy, and ultimately even the characters start to pity the wild man.

Jack: All that power and stamina and fighting acumen, but yet all you seem to get to use it for is...this. Another laborious climb to another locked-room murder.

Ferrier: You've long passed the point where human lives hold any meaning. You are detached from our species, a...a stranger, loose among us. I thought the sight of you would stir distain in me, or even fear...but as I look at you now...I feel for you only the strangest sort of pity.

What I like most about Lord Hawthorne as a take on Tarzan is that, far too often, we see intended “deconstructions” or reinterpretations of the classic pulp heroes, or even superheroes, that largely just make them villainous by extrapolating the worst possible interpretations of the character’s traits or real-life circumstances around them to villainize them, or outright invent faults and problems that weren’t there in the source material, usually to put one character over the other. The entirety of League of Extraordinary Gentlemen is built on this, as is a lot of Superman parodies built on getting the most graphically shocking results possible. 

I'll admit it’s somewhat hypocritical of me to criticize this entirely, because it’s an impulse that I sadly admit I myself have fallen into in my own writings on characters not my own, as anyone who’s ever talked with me about Doc Savage, a character I do not like and cannot bring myself to like, can testify. I get why this happens, even if I understand why it’s shitty. Ultimately, the best “deconstructions” or reinterpretations will always come from people who are best familiar with the material they are using and know exactly the best ways to twist it, like with Mark Waid’s Irredeemable, an Evil Superman comic written by a huge Superman fan who knows exactly the absolute worst ways a Superman character can go sour, and was leagues ahead of works like The Boys and Brightburn who largely just take the “easy” pot shots. 

With Lord Hawthorne, we get a character who’s an evil take on Tarzan, but whose evilness isn’t made from exaggerating or adding faults to the source material character, which could very easily be done. I never got the sense that the author hates Tarzan and wants everyone to hate Tarzan and is willingly to sacrifice immersion just to get across how much he hates Tarzan (again, something LOEG does way too often), in fact it really doesn’t matter how the author feels about Tarzan, because those feelings are irrevelant to what’s on the page. 

Instead, Lord Hawthorne is an evil take on Tarzan whose characterization is largely based on just looking at the source material, the character’s origins, and extrapolating the circumstances in which that could go sour. What would a “wild man” forced to grow up and fight for survival every day in the jungle look like, what would that person look like when making it’s first contact with human affection, how could that person be twisted and manipulated into becoming a villain, what’s even left to that person outside of violent action scenes. How little it would take to twist a childhood hero into a brute that murders old women in their hospital beds, just by tweaking a few details about the context surrounding him. 

He is not a caricature of Tarzan, he’s not a parody, he is just Tarzan, but no longer the power fantasy. No longer the center of fantastical adventures. No longer getting the best of both worlds, but instead having to contend with the worst of them. Ultimately only finding some dignity in death, with his nemesis expressing hope that, maybe somewhere else, he’s going to have better luck than what this world afforded him.

[life-rewritten]

Start-Up The Seo Sisters and Fulfilling a Legacy

Taking a break from the Love Triangle and looking at how Fate brought the two Seo sisters together again. Both girls after three years really made me proud have I said I love how this show portrayed these girls and making them strong and powerful and also a wonderful manifestation of their father's fight, dreams and hopes coming true. It's beautiful. Let's see how much he affected both girls and their journey towards their purpose and destiny.’

CheongMyung: The Seo Sisters and their father’s influence

 Yay, more importantly, we're getting a full circle moment; we started of episode 1 of Start-Up with the focus on the father of our two girls (CheongMyeong) being berated, abused and beaten at work, he finally quits because he has dreams of his Startup. The journey led both his daughters to see his suffering yet Injae saw it as a reason to never be trampled on again, and Dalmi saw it as a reason to be in charge of your own dreams and life. Injae ended up choosing the mother's side for safety and a way to survive, and Dalmi chose her father because she cared more about his wellbeing and presence than comfort. Due to this, she joined in as his inspiration and helper for his Startup idea. As he was about to make a deal, however, his dreams got cut short, thrown away and tossed to the side as he died. 

The person most affected by this was Dalmi who had to give up his idea of the Startup mindset and start working for another company that also used and mistreated her. It's because of Dosan and Injae's mocking, (2 people that inspired and always pushed her for the better), Dalmi finally snapped and decided to go back to her first thought, it's better to be in charge of your own dreams and life. Meanwhile, Injae found her pride stepped on yet again, she also was used and mistreated by someone she called family, she stepped down and decided to fight for her place and own her own dreams and life, she decided to start her own Startup. Both sisters journey led them to Sandbox, which was precisely for them, inspired by their dad's need to protect Dalmi from falling. In a way, both sisters enter Sandbox and reunite with their destiny, to fulfil their father's failed Start Up dreams. It's beautiful. Dalmi makes it an actual reality, she names the company after him, and Injae backs it and invests in it, and becomes the mentor to her younger sister. They both had a part in their fathers legacy. 

Here we go focusing more in-depth on what this means: How has Injae and Dalmi fulfilled or mirrored their father in this show till now? What was Fate's plan for them all along?

INJAE: 

An Image of Lady Yoon: Advice, Mentorship, and Innovation

Fate always had plans to return Injae back to her family roots, her final destination was to be humble, to realise why dreams mattered, to become someone influential with the ability to help and push people. 

Her Father's Downfall

She would become the opposite of all the other companies that misused her father and abused him. When seeing him beat, she made up her mind that the way to survive was to be like them, cold, cunning, mean and greedy for money. Upon entering Sandbox, Fate introduced her to people who'd help her grow: Dalmi, Sandbox owner Lady Yoon and her father's vision (the girl on the swings). Without knowing it, she'd return back under her father's protection, after being tossed out and manipulated by her new family. She found her self like her father alone, hurt and frustrated and wanting to control her own life without depending on people, wanting to prove to people she was worth it. And Injae was worth it, she was highly influential, intelligent and she had experience and had become one of them. But she realised that she had no reason at first for why she wanted to do this; it wasn't money, and doing it for pride didn't fulfil her, doing it their way ended up hurting so many people and caused lives to go into chaos. She realised that she wanted to make the world a better place but not by greed or pride. 

Her father's inspiration: His last words and hope

That's why the image of the girl on the swings hunted her. It reminded her of her father in her life, like a constant reminder she found her self using it as a way to push her self forward remembering what that girl on the swing meant:  A safe space inspired by her father's last words. Sandbox became a shield for her from her stepfather, a push for her to become even better, and a place for her to own her life, and become great. Her father's last words inspired Lady Yoon to make Sandbox for people like her, he was always there basically guiding her each time she looked at the picture. Fate led her back to him, even though she had guilt for looking down and missing out on him. Injae had been so determined to not end up like him when he fell, but she ended up realising that she wanted to be like him, she wanted to be the girl he was trying to protect from falling on the swings painfully, in a way he did that with his words. Creating Sandbox made both his daughters safe and protected every time they lost. It provided a springboard for both girls each time they encountered rejection, failures and betrayals. Sandbox provided them with everything to make their dreams come true, their father actually ended up putting enough sand to stop them from hurting from being pushed on the swings. His last words affected not just Dalmi but Injae too. Sandbox led her to an actual mentor that inspired and drove her to find out her why. 

Her father's Sandbox

Which is why it becomes so beautiful and a full-circle moment to see her also potentially become a sandbox for people like her father starting with her sister. She ended up becoming a safe space for her sister's dreams, for his own legacy to be fulfilled. She ended up creating her own Startup (just like he wanted to do), and she ended up working with her sister to make life easier and accessible for people. Just like he always wanted to achieve with his dreams. Remember without Dalmi she had a different focus, she had an innovative plan, but it caused chaos and mistreatment to so many workers people who probably were like her father at one time you know, feeling dejected, and lost and betrayed. She was very determined to block them out, but Dalmi entered and helped her find a way to make it more sustainable and still helpful to people, without affecting their jobs and workspaces. 

But I find it more fascinating she in episode 14 after three years becomes the very image of Lady Yoon to Dalmi as she was to her. She's giving advice but also not putting her down, she's thinking about helping and pushing for good things, and she is investing and making small companies like her sisters become successful. She embraced what Fate wanted her to embrace, to finally start a startup where she was supporting and helping make lives more comfortable for people to work. She became a sandbox for people like her father and Dalmi. In doing so, she ended up being involved in the creation of a company named after him. She was the person who gave it room to grow, invested in it to make it viable, and protected it by ensuring she mentored Dalmi properly. She watched and guided her father's legacy.

Her father's namesake: Seo In Jae

And that's the last step for her is to throw away the Won identity like she did in Ep 14 after finding out about the blindness of her grandmum, but it also made her realise she was running away from her true self, and her best self, she would receive warmth and love with her family. By dissolving her adoption and becoming Seo again, she embraced her father's namesake again, and that's what Fate wanted for her. Just like she returned into his safety and protection with Sandbox, she returned back to being part of his legacy and being his daughter again. She finally embraced her family's name and returned back to the start, where they were a team, and together. That's her growth, to become humble, to throw away her pride and to finally embrace love, trust and warmth instead of stepping down on others. It wasn't worth running away from who she was when the other version her would have been cold, lonely and broken. By returning back to her family slowly, she'll end up finding love, support and using that strength to be a better version of Lady Yoon. 

Role Models for Injae apart from her father

Dalmi: When Injae first came into Sandbox she stole Dalmi's actual identity as the girl on the swings. She wanted so badly to be that girl who inspired Sandbox and was a valuable source to people. She realised she had made the wrong choices each time she saw that girl on the swings. But that's where Dalmi came in, Dalmi forced Injae to look at things differently, she realised why Dalmi was the face of Sandbox, she was determined and had hope, she wanted to make things easier for people, and fulfil their father's dreams. She wanted to show that she made the right choice. Injae noticed how good Dalmi was, against all odds, she saw how actually Dalmi's choices were always her strength and her will to be better, she had chosen their father whose last words became a safe space for her to become her own person and own her own company. She had chosen Dosan who became one of the greatest and needed engineers in the company, Dalmi had always made choices despite all odds. Fate decided to bring her to Injae so that Injae also finds her own dreams and the reason for why she wanted to own a company. She finally realised her fathers' reason (why) to make the world a better place, to push things and evolve, to grow and protect everyone

Lady Yoon:��Fate had made her the mentor of Injae so she could learn and become like her. Someone who listened and cared for people like her dad, who didn't care about pride or greed but cared about innovation and creativity. Injae was meant to learn and follow her lead and become someone like her. And she did, she became like her for Dalmi and probably in the future will become like that for many others, she became the Sandbox for Dalmi not to fall and lose her dreams. In a way, Injae did fulfil her father's dreams and hopes for a chance to startups. She ended up being an excellent resource for making his Startup dreams a reality, she became the mentor and guide to his influence, and she fulfilled his legacy that way. This is why I think she'll become the next mentor in the Sandbox contest/competition or she'll end up taking after Sandbox once Lady Yoon retires. Injae is definitely the person for that, and that's how she'll complete her father's legacy. 

DALMI

The Sandbox image: Ease, Ideas and Inspiration -heart/emotions

Meanwhile, as Injae represents like the chance for her father's last words and hopes to come through. Dalmi is the physical manifestation of her father's image and dreams coming true. She's his inspiration, the actual girl on the swings he wanted to protect, and his number one supporter. Dalmi takes over his role and fulfils his legacy by actually being a CEO of a company named after him built for people to be at ease, self-reliant and without limits. She's her father manifestation of his ideas, she's his physical inspiration, she's also his actual legacy. Here's how:

Her father's pain

Seeing her father being beaten up caused Dalmi to react differently to Injae, she didn't care about his pride being stepped on, she found a reason why he should quit and be in control of his own life. It made have this respect for his braveness, and his determination to create something for people that would help them, whilst also finding something gave him purpose. But Dalmi has also felt like her father after he died, she felt worthless, and she also felt behind and had a lack of status. She felt mocked by Fate for choosing this path, and she even gave up on his Startup dreams to follow society and go work at a company like his previous one. Although she didn't get abused, she was used and mistreated by the company, her potential was overlooked and never rewarded, and she felt frustrated and tired of doing good but never getting anyway. She felt aimless after her father died, and she needed direction.

 Obviously, Dosan came and provided that for her by inspiring her to quit. Now when she did like her father she took the risk, she understood more about why he did what he did and why he was determined to be a leader/owner of his own dreams and business. Whilst Injae saw his downfall as worthless, Dalmi saw his decline and his rise from it as strength despite the fact he failed in the end. She became his revival to keep pushing and fighting for dreams to come true. And Fate backed her up and led her right into his protection (Sandbox)

Her father's presence and guidance

And that's why Sandbox is so essential to her. She'd stayed with her father for so long helping him and supporting him on his ideas, it's why she grew up with her own automatic spark of creation, ideas and determination. She embodied her father as he was her role model. Again Injae didn't see her father as a role model she saw the other higher-ups, she wanted to become them not to get hurt, but Dalmi saw her father as her ultimate guide and role model. He's the one who put in her heart this love for innovation and business, and he's the one who made her determined to succeed. Finding out that he's the one who inspired Sandbox it made her feel secure and determined to prove she was the girl on the swings, she was protected, pushed and guided to become great, to follow after his footsteps but this time is successful. You could even argue that Fate is a manifestation of her father's protection and love, she doesn't know where to go, but Fate is protective and ready to lead her to the right way, even when it hurts Fate offers her an alternative and a way to not fall, same as Injae. 

Her father's inspiration/image

And it's just by her being her self that she fulfils her father's inspiration, it's her heart that makes all products work, her care and nurturing energy for people, she's always been someone supportive and a catalyst for people to create, grow and succeed (her father, Dosan and Injae). In doing so, she becomes the very face of Sandbox company, the metaphor for all the people who are trying to succeed and push through in life. She becomes a hopeful image for freedom, and happiness because she shows that with determination, positiveness, and heart, you can be protected, and guided into your destiny. 

Not just for startups though but for the people in the world, she also fulfils her father's dreams by creating and inspiring ideas that make the world a better place, a safer place, and a more manageable place. But also to manifest his fast paced technology that can change the world that he wanted from the start. To be ahead and innovative. She focuses on the vulnerable and the weak, and she helps them with products that make them self reliant. Its the motto her father wanted to follow, to be self-reliant: to own your own life despite circumstances, to move forward without having to rely on others, to be better and secure in life with no limits to what you can do. This is why her most significant idea is the self-driving car made in a company named after her father's. If Injae is meant to fulfil her father's wish for a sandbox for people to be safe and shielded and guided when lost, Dalmi is intended to represent the autonomous car, self-reliant products for people to be determined, and confident and ahead without limitations. 

Honestly, this post was difficult to write, but I hope you understand what I'm trying to say. Fate wanted both Dalmi and Injae to return back and make their father's dreams a reality: a dream for a startup that helps people, a dream that helped make him own his life and not be used by people, a dream where people like him could be safe from falling too hard when they fail at first, a dream where people are one step ahead, and the world is more comfortable and limitless. By having Dalmi and Injae work together for 3 years to make the company named after him a success, both Dalmi and Injae fulfilled everything their father wanted in life, and they embodied him and fulfilled his legacy. By bringing them together, Fate also provided both sisters with a chance to reunite and go back to the start and have support, trust and love again with each other. Both also became self-reliant, stronger, and bigger than the people who looked down on them and Dalmi ended up proving she made the right choice, her father was always needed, the worthy and best option all along. 

[night-filled-mountain]

Hello! Your answers for Caleb were very interesting. How about Fjord?

Thank you! 😃 Here’s Fjord:

How I feel about this character

I mean, I love him to death. (I know this is getting repetitive, but I love them all, ok?) I took longer to connect with him than most of the other party members; for a while, I thought he was a nice but sort of bland, macho leaderly type. Later, of course, I learned that this was exactly what he wanted people to think. In fact, he’s an anxious mess of insecurities just like everyone else in the party, and thinking back on the care Travis took in constructing this character is just jaw-dropping for me.

His frequent use of Mask of Many Faces in the early days of the campaign was such great foreshadowing for the fact that his whole persona was constructed, modeled on someone else. His old accent, his smooth confidence and charisma, his tendency to take charge...all echoes of a man he believed to be dead and wanted to become, because he hated so many aspects of who he really was. It has been such a gift watching him shed that persona bit by bit (and deconstruct everything from body issues to toxic masculinity in the process). Letting his tusks grow in, shedding the old accent, consciously giving up his leadership role, rejecting Uk’otoa despite his once-overwhelming fear of being “boring” and “useless” and unlovable without his warlock powers. The scene where he throws away his sword is so incredibly, gaspingly good, probably one of my top ten scenes in Critical Role ever.

...I’m going to wind this down now, because I am capable of writing SO MUCH about Fjord, his character development, and his relationships, and if I’m actually getting back into meta now, I doubt this will be the last of it.

All the people I ship romantically with this character

Historically: Caleb or Molly, mostly. I also think Fjord/Veth is underrated! (That said, Fjord has always felt very a-spec to me--not that that precludes shipping, by any means.)

My non-romantic OTP for this character

Definitely Beau, but since I’ve already written about their friendship: Caduceus! Their spiritual mentorship is something so unique among all the CR relationships; I love how Cad has found such a sense of purpose in guiding a very willing Fjord toward the Wildmother, and how Fjord has embraced many things about Cad’s spiritual practices, but also made them his own, developed his own special relationship with their shared goddess, and expanded Cad’s horizons a bit in the process.

My unpopular opinion about this character

I don’t think I’ll ever be excited about Fjorester. I don’t hate it! I’m so happy they’re happy! I’ve always loved many aspects of their friendship (to the point where I considered listing Jester under “non-romantic OTP”!). But this particular romance just doesn’t push any of the buttons that spark my interest. And that’s ok! Laura and Travis et al. are having a blast, and that’s what matters. 🙂

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

I WANT HIM TO BE THE LEADER AGAIN. Ok, I know he was thrilled to take a step back ever since the Uk’otoa arc, and I understand why; he had some not-so-proud leadership moments during that quest. But I see those as an anomaly brought about by all the pressure re: Uk’otoa, Avantika, and his perceived need to live up to Vandren’s captaining style. For most of the campaign prior to that arc, Fjord was an exemplary “captain” of the Mighty Nein: soliciting everyone’s opinions, assigning them tasks that played to their individual strengths, keeping the group cohesive and on track while also making sure they all felt heard and cared for. Sometimes I feel like he’s fading into the background more than I’d like these days, and I’d love to see him take on more of that “face” role again.

[mosspetal]

WELL I WAS BORED SO I WROTE A SPOTSTAR NINE LIVES CEREMONY

shadowsight is there because Spotfur requested that he would be. don’t think too hard about it

let’s hope this read more thing works

Spotfur shivered, her long fur rippling in the wind. “So how do we do this whole Moonpool thing again?”

Shadowsight giggled. “You just touch your nose to the water and close your eyes. StarClan will come to you,” he said gently.

Shadowsight watched as Spotfur hesitantly dipped her nose to the water. He saw her flinch at the cold, but settle into a sleeping position, closing her eyes. He quickly followed her, touching his nose to the water.

Shadowsight woke up, finding himself in a lush forest. This must be what ThunderClan looks like in StarClan, he thought. He glanced to the side and saw Spotfur next to him, her teal eyes fixed on something in the distance. He peered forward, and saw a group of StarClan cats walking towards them in the distance. Spotfur pricked her ears up, staring curiously at the approaching spirits, as if she was looking for someone.

She’s looking for Lionblaze, he realized. Lionblaze had never been his biggest fan, but he was Spotfur’s father, and he knew they had been close. Finally, the group was close enough to them to pick out the cats. Shadowsight didn’t recognize all of them, but he saw Lionblaze, Bramblestar, and Stemleaf in the group of cats.

The first cat stepped forward. She was a warm brown she-cat, with one blue and one amber eye. Rosepetal, recognized Shadowsight.

“Spotfur,” greeted Rosepetal warmly. “You’ve come so far.”

Spotfur beamed with pride.

Rosepetal touched her nose to her shoulder. “With this life, I give you mentorship. May you always look out for those in your care. And may you realize the strengths of those in your Clan— especially your friend, Bristlefrost.

Shadowsight watched Spotfur, frozen to the spot, as she closed her eyes and let out a long breath. Shadowsight could feel a hint of the soft caring and quiet observance that came with that life, though he knew she would be feeling many times that.

Spotfur opened her eyes. “Thank you,” she murmured softly.

Rosepetal dipped her head. “No, thank you,” she replied, smiling. “And tell Bristlefrost I’m proud of her.”

The next cat stepped forward. She was a calico with warm amber eyes, though Shadowsight didn’t know her name. Judging by her look of confusion, neither did Spotfur.

The unfamiliar cat laughed. “You look confused,” she said teasingly. “Hasn’t Brackenfur told you about me?”

Spotfur’s eyes widened. “Sorreltail?” she asked.

Sorreltail smiled. “That’s right. I died in the Great Battle, you know. Protected my kits with every breath I had. But I didn’t regret it. I had a good life.” She touched her nose to Spotfur’s shoulder, though she had to stretch to reach it.

“With this life, I give you joy. May you enjoy the beauty in life, and always remember: there are better times ahead.”

Spotfur smiled, closing her eyes, and Shadowsight could feel the pure warmth and sunlight that came with this life. She eased, all her joints relaxing, as though she was remembering every little moment that brought her joy.

Sorreltail pulled away, stepping back, as Spotfur opened her eyes. Sorreltail laughed once more. “Remember, there will always be better times ahead.”

Another cat stepped forward, a white she-cat with little patches of cream and gray, and brilliant blue eyes. Next to Spotfur, Shadowsight realized that the shape of their muzzles, the angle of their ears, and even the distinctive spots next to their right eyes looked very similar. He realized they must be related.

Spotfur tilted her head. “Who are you?” she asked curiously.

The white cat laughed. “Aren’t you a bold one! I am Frostfur. I've been told we look quite similar.”

Spotfur reached up to touch the three spots just above her right eye. “You have these too!” she exclaimed.

Frostfur nodded. “Yes, we are kin. And for that reason, I’m here to give you a life for the love of a mother. You love your kits more than anything in the world, don’t you? Now that you are a leader, every cat in ThunderClan should be like your kits. Protect them with your life.”

Shadowsight saw Spotfur struggling, as if she was rooted to her place. Then, he felt a wave of ferocious fury wash over him. Is this what Dovewing and Tigerstar feel like? he wondered.

Spotfur slowly stopped struggling, and opened her clear, ocean-blue eyes. She seemed to be filled with a new understanding. “Thank you,” she whispered softly. Frostfur ran her tail along her flank, before stepping back to the group of cats.

A gray and white tom stepped forward. Shadowsight recognized him as Dappletuft, one of the cats who died trying to kill Ashfur.

Spotfur’s eyes lit up. “Dappletuft!” she cried. “I’ve missed you!”

Dappletuft purred, rubbing his cheek against hers. “I have as well, my friend. Don’t forget to tell your kits about me!”

Spotfur nuzzled him. “I won’t,” she whispered softly.

Dappletuft touched his nose to her shoulder. “With this life I give you proactivity,” he said proudly, as if he hadn’t expected to be able to give someone a life. “Never hesitate to solve a problem before it gets out of hand. If cats had just been proactive, so much tragedy could have been avoided.”

Spotfur took the life, a mix of fury and grief battling on her face. Shadowsight knew she must be feeling the same emotions Dappletuft felt in his last moments of life. His heart ached with grief for the young lives taken too early by Ashfur’s greed.

Dappletuft stepped back. “May StarClan light your path, my friend.”

Another cat stepped forward, a tiny white and gray tom. Shadowsight recognized his Clanmate Conefoot. He looked bright-eyed and enthusiastic, just as he did in life.

“Spotfur!” he said cheerfully. “Glad to see you fulfilled your dream!”

Spotfur stooped down to rub cheeks with him. “It’s good to see you,” she purred.

Conefoot had to stretch to reach her forehead. Shadowsight suppressed a laugh at how huge Spotfur was compared to him. And she’s already the biggest cat I know, he thought.

“With this life, I give you curiosity!” said Conefoot cheerfully. “Always look closer. You can’t solve problems if you don’t know what they are! Use this to guide your decisions as leader.”

Spotfur widened her eyes. It was as if she suddenly understood, suddenly knew so many things she never thought about before. Then it was gone, and her expression eased into quiet comfort. “I’ll miss you,” she whispered softly.

Conefoot purred. “We will always be with you.” He stepped back to sit next to Dappletuft, the two of them twining their tails together.

He caught Spotfur staring at their closeness longingly. She noticed him, and quickly muttered “they can be together like they never could in life.” He knew she must be thinking of her mate Stemleaf, who seemed worlds away now. He tried to offer her a comforting glance, but she looked away, as if she wanted to be left alone in her grief for her mate.

The next cat stepped forward, a cat Shadowsight recognized immediately. There was Bramblestar, looking just as he did before the impostor took over his body. Shadowsight saw Spotfur tense up, as if expecting an attack, and Shadowsight knew she would have a hard time seeing him as anyone other than the impostor. Bramblestar dipped his head. “Greetings, Spotfur.”

Spotfur slowly eased up. “It’s you? Bramblestar?” Her tone was still nervous. Bramblestar sighed.

“Yes, it’s me.” He touched his muzzle to her forehead. “With this life, I give you independence. You must go forth, make your own decisions, trust your own thoughts. You were one of the only cats willing to stand up to Ashfur at first. I hope you’ll carry these values with you as you take on the role of leader.”

Bramblestar stepped back. There was a bittersweet tension in the scene, as if Spotfur couldn’t quite disconnect him from Ashfur. Then she whispered, so softly that only Shadowsight could hear, “I wish you had treated Squirrelflight better.”

So it wasn’t about Ashfur, realized Shadowsight. But before he had time to mull over that, another cat stepped up. It was a small, green-eyed tom, with a pelt the color of flames. Shadowsight’s breath caught in his throat. Could it be…?

Spotfur stared at him, awestruck. “Firestar?” she whispered.

Firestar nodded. “It’s me. My dear great-granddaughter, I wish I could’ve met you. I think we would’ve gotten along very well.”

Spotfur still seemed stunned that Firestar was talking to her. “I— wow,” she stammered. “It’s an honor to meet you.”

Firestar touched his nose to her forehead, stretching up. “More of an honor for me, young one. With this life, I give you perseverance. You must push on, stronger than before. Never stop fighting for what is right.”

Spotfur tensed up, as if preparing for battle. Shadowsight guessed that is what the life that Firestar gave her felt like. Then, she eased up and smiled. “Wow,” she whispered, again. “Firestar.”

Firestar winked. “Tell Squirrelflight I love her!”

Firestar stepped back, leaving room for a big golden tabby to move forward. Lionblaze, thought Shadowsight, his heart sinking. I hope I don’t have to talk to him. But Lionblaze’s attention was all focused on his daughter. His eyes were filled with such warmth, such love that Shadowsight was wondering if this was even the same cat that he knew.

“My daughter,” he said teasingly. “You’re even bigger than I am!”

Spotfur laughed. “Get used to it, Dad,” she replied brightly.

With the two of them standing next to each other, Shadowsight was struck with their resemblance. They were both huge, bigger than even his own father, Tigerstar, with deep, resonating voices.

Lionblaze touched his nose to Spotfur’s head. “With this life, I give you loyalty,” he rumbled. “Loyalty to your Clan, loyalty to your friends, but most importantly, loyalty to yourself. Trust in your decisions. It is your duty.”

Spotfur smiled, taking the life with a burst of warmth. Lionblaze stood there, with his muzzle to her head, before finally pulling away. “Lead well, Spotty,” he teased her.

Spotfur ducked her head, embarrassed. “Dad, I’m a Clan leader. Can we stop with the nicknames?”

Lionblaze laughed and stepped back. “May StarClan light your path!” he called.

And finally, the cat meant to give her final life stepped forward. Shadowsight saw her eyes widen as a skinny ginger tom stepped forward, his white patches glowing in the moonlight.

“Stemleaf,” cried Spotfur. “It’s you!”

Stemleaf purred. “My love. How I’ve missed you.”

Spotfur leaned forward to touch noses with him. She moved hesitantly at first, but then in a flash, she was wrapped around her mate, cuddling with him for the first time in moons.

Stemleaf looked at her sheepishly. “I just wanted to apologize for— you know. Ashfur kinda made me attack the kits, and—“

Spotfur cut him off. “That wasn’t your fault,” she said firmly. “Only his.”

Stemleaf looked relived. “Well, I guess we should probably get on with this whole nine lives thing, you know?”

Spotfur nodded. “Yeah I… guess we should.”

Stemleaf touched his nose to her forehead. “With this life, I give you love. Be it romantic, platonic, familial, or anything in between, always remember to open your heart to those you are meant to protect.”

Shadowsight saw her eyes brighten. “I love you,” she whispered.

“I do too,” replied Stemleaf, his light green eyes brimming with warmth.

Stemleaf turned to face the StarClan cats. He twisted his head to look at Spotfur.

“I pronounce you Spotstar,” he yowled. “Leader of ThunderClan!”

“Spotstar! Spotstar! Spotstar!” chanted the StarClan cats. Spotstar stood, frozen with wonder, until they all quieted down.

She stepped forward. “Thank you,” she called, addressing the StarClan cats. “I won’t let you down. I’ll bring the Clans what they need.” She breathed out, then looked up, determined, like she had been preparing for this moment her whole life. “I’m going to change the warrior code,” she said firmly. “The Clans need change. The rule about forbidden relationships has never caused anything but harm. Code 13 has allowed many horrible leaders to rise to power. Not all codes are bad, of course. Kits should be protected at any cost, and we shouldn’t kill pointlessly. But the Clans are at a point when the whole code isn’t serving us anymore. That’s my goal as leader.”

The cats looked stunned, but then a speckled gray cat called out from the back. “She’s right, you know.”

The she-cat stepped forward. “I am Raincloud,” she announced. “My leader, Darkstar, created the 13th code. I knew it was bad then. This past few seasons has only proven that.”

Spotstar smiled at her. “Thank you, Raincloud,” she said.

Shadowsight looked at Spotstar, and was shocked to see that she was starting to fade. “It’s almost morning!” he called. “We have to go!”

Spotstar nodded. She cast one last sorrowful glance at Stemleaf.

“We will meet again, my love,” he murmured gently.

Spotstar smiled at him, before closing her eyes. Shadowsight quickly followed suit, and found himself standing next to the Moonpool.

Bristlefrost quickly walked forward to nuzzle her friend. “Did you get your lives?” she asked excitedly.

Spotstar nodded. “Yes. I’m Spotstar now.” She looked at Bristlefrost warmly. “Rosepetal wanted me to tell you that she’s proud of you.”

Bristlefrost grinned proudly. “Thanks.”

Spotstar purred. “Let’s go home.”

Bristlefrost nodded. “You know, Icekit got up to some really funny mischief today…” The two of them vanished out of the bushes, talking like old friends would. As Shadowsight walked out of the clearing, he couldn’t help but think that with the two of them as the leader and mediator of ThunderClan, the Clans just might face a better future.

[cruelfeline]

Can I get your Hordak opinion? Say after Prime, Hordak is just Tired™ and is told to build trust with people so they don’t fear him by being clear with his intentions and showing vulnerability. He goes along with it because why not and just shares his thoughts, feelings, and even personal stories whenever asked. When he realizes it's working, he tells the other clones and they're just like oh we've been doing that! Does this seem super un-Hordak to you or does it just give him Tired Dad energy?

Ah, well, I’m happy to give my opinion, for what it’s worth!

Hmmmm.... y’know, anon, I’ve always had it in my head that it might actually be easier for other clones to acclimate to Etheria while Hordak has difficulties, rather than the other way around. I’m not certain I have any sort of real knowledge that would let me tell you if your interpretation is “un-Hordak,” but I can tell you why I think the way I do.

There’s this idea, I think, that Hordak has been “free” longer than all of the other clones, but I actually take a different view. Hordak has been separate longer than the other clones, but he wasn’t truly free until he killed Prime. Hordak has experienced this painful, awkward state of having the opportunity to be free of Prime but never taking it, because his emotional dependency on Prime was so strong. So while he’s been on Etheria for thirty-odd years, he has remained bound to Prime all those years. And during those years, he’s acquired a lot of baggage in terms of trauma and ill-feeling with the Etherians. For obvious reasons.

The other clones, while new to both separation and freedom, are very much “clean slates.” Oh, I doubt things will be easy for them, but they don’t have decades of war to answer for. They don’t have the reality of being “free” for years without ever truly being free. They don’t have that existing sense of... well, potentially failure, to contend with.

So I am uncertain that Hordak would necessarily play this sort of guiding role for others, “Tired Dad” or otherwise. Rather, I think that he might have significant difficulty in feeling like he’s progressing as well as the other clones, especially with Wrongie (who is accepted by Etherians immediately and appears to acclimate very well) in the picture. I think he might take his feelings of inadequacy regarding Prime’s demands and essentially carry them over to the new task of assimilating into Etherian life as a truly free person. 

Essentially: I don’t see Hordak necessarily comfortable or even capable of taking up a mentorship position. With all of the history he has with Etherians, and the trauma of killing Prime, and his innate lack of self-confidence, I think he might actually be at something of a disadvantage. If that makes sense?

[bigskydreaming]

I'm having a worse than usual day, so my go to moodlift method is making up headcanons for Dick that don't involve superheroing. You know, the romantic hero, the 'most eligible bachelor' aspect.. gets the focus. Because hey plenty of us had a crush on him growing up. Just for fun, I wanna ask you, do you think he's a slow burn romance kinda guy or intense fiery passionate romance from the get go kinda guy? One more, the age old question, is HE an ass guy or a tiddy guy? Imo he's a thigh guy..

Sorry you’re having a crap day, and uh, hope this didn’t end up not fun, I got lost in the headcanoning and character analysis and zigged and zagged per usual, so……I do not trust my ability to tell, overall. LMAO. But good question, made me think!

I think it depends on the person. I feel like Dick is capable of both, that sometimes feelings just creep up on him for someone over time, but other times he’s just drawn to someone instantly. For me, Babs and Kory is the proof - the instant crush on Babs from day one is more of a Reboot introduction to their dynamic…..in various older continuities, she was more a rival at first. Even as he advocated for Bruce to help train her and not stop her from being Batgirl at sometimes, he still very much was competitive with her, that sort of thing. You could argue it was the schoolboy kinda crush, that idea of a boy pulling the pigtails of a girl he likes because he doesn’t know how to admit he likes her or even realizes himself that he does. But personally, I find that explanation doesn’t really fit Dick, as its more fitting to someone who lacked his early maturity.

The thing is, a lot of people tend to focus on some of Dick’s more immature behaviors and actions, as a grown man and back when he was Robin with the puns and seeming innocence, and just see it as innocence and immaturity…..but I’ve always seen it as a coping mechanism. Dick grew up fast at a very early age, as much as Bruce himself did - they just coped with it in very different ways. People emphasize that Bruce took him in partly to keep Dick from turning out like he did, but they often forget at the same time that Bruce also took Dick in because he empathized with him, saw himself and his own tragedy reflected in Dick’s. Life-altering events had already happened to Dick before he ever set foot in Wayne Manor…..and Dick was altered. He was painfully aware of how cruel life could be, how serious things were, before Bruce ever actually had any ability to halt that realization from ever touching Dick.

The difference between Bruce and Dick and how they turned out, is that with Bruce’s support in those early years, Dick willfully clung to as much of his childhood as was left to him, even if at times it was the ‘fake it until you make it’ mentality. Many of his more immature behaviors are IMO a spiteful defiance of life’s attempt to make him grow up before he should have had to….and Bruce encouraged these things, IMO. He gave Dick the support and shelter, the buffer that allowed Dick to act immature even in the face of gravely serious and dark issues, because quite frankly, Dick cracking puns even while they were face to face with a life-threatening danger is probably a healthier coping mechanism than any Bruce had at the same age, at least in Bruce’s eyes if nothing else. 

But my point is, Dick’s youthful optimism and cheeriness even in the darkest parts of growing up Robin in Gotham City….none of that existed because Dick was truly childish and immature as befitted his actual age, thanks to Bruce taking him in and guiding him to turn out better than he did or whatever that line of thought might look like…..rather, it existed because Dick made the willful and deliberate choice to act as much the child as he could for as long as he could…..and I think that in the early years when things were really good between them and they were largely on the same page, Bruce recognized this choice for what it was, this defiance to the cards life had dealt Dick, and he encouraged and defended Dick’s ability to make this choice and act this way.

But you can’t see the kind of things all the Robins saw and actually be as immature and goofy as Dick acted as Robin, untouched by all of that. Dick was right there in the thick of it all along. How can you avoid being touched by Gotham’s darkness, seeing Gotham’s darkness, when you’re punching it right in the face, you know? You can’t. But what you can do, if you choose to, and which is what Dick chose to do….is not give it the satisfaction of knowing it touched you. The real testament of how mature Dick was or not as a young crime-fighting Robin, how aware he was or not of the grim realities of life, was not in how he acted when face to face with villains and criminals, but rather, how he acted when face to face with their victims. THAT’S where the reality of Dick’s maturity shined through, even LONG before he met Barbara in any canon.

Which is how this tangent brings us back to topic, lol….a schoolboy crush being the explanation for some of Dick’s earlier pettiness with Barbara and their rivalry at times, like, just doesn’t track with Dick’s actual maturity, IMO. The actual more likely explanation as I see it is that Dick did genuinely clash with her at times, in the very early years, that his initial attitudes were a confused mish-mash of feeling threatened by her and her possibly getting between him and Bruce, the partnership that was in all but name his unique form of father-son bonding time….but also at the same time still being Dick Grayson and feeling compelled to do the right thing and respect and thus defend her being given the same chance and training he’d been given, to do what they both felt needed doing, that they were driven to do.

So I don’t think he and Babs were instant friends, and I don’t think she was his instant crush….I think it was slowburn with her, he gradually grew to develop feelings for her over time, as his respect for her mind and capabilities grew to outweigh whatever conflicting emotions he felt about her being around, and then eventually blossomed into actual love.

Then in contrast, you have Kory. And I think Dick was instantly attracted to her from the get-go, and their relationship was the very epitome of intense passionate romance and all the ups and downs that go along with it, as befits too of the most primal and passionate people in the DC universe. Dick was drawn to her pretty much from day one, and Kory was as well, and it wasn’t an opposites attract thing so much as two beings resonating on the same wavelength, even if at times from different parts of the same spectrum. 

Because here’s the thing about Dick that I think links the two kinds of relationships and makes them both fitting for him…..he is very much a creature of instincts. He goes with his gut, he responds to things on an automatic and visceral level. But at the same time, the other truth about Dick is that his mind is no less exceptional than anyone else’s in the Batfamily, and his instincts are guided by a hell of a lot more intellect and processing power than most peoples’ are. He’s been trained from the time he could walk, even long before he met Bruce, to have exceptional situational awareness, to adapt to changes in his environment and predicaments with a moment’s notice, to take in every possible relevant detail at a glance when the stakes are literally those of leaping off a high trapeze. Dick trusts his instincts, because Dick’s instincts are exceptional, and with reason.

And this applies to every part of his life, not just the superhero parts. So when Dick feels drawn to someone like Kory, I think he trusts his gut and goes with it….he might not necessarily even know yet on a conscious level why he’s attracted to them and they’re someone he could really fall for and have a relationship with, he just knows that he does feel that way, and trusts that its for a reason. And then at the same time, with someone like Barbara, he likely had those same instincts about her, leading to the times he defends her to Bruce even though he might have clashed with her just minutes before, but he knows there’s a reason for him to do that, act that way, even if it takes much longer for that to transition from a mere possibility of actual compatibility to conscious feelings of actual attraction and love. 

Its all instinct to him either way….but the person he’s instinctively reacting to has the definitive role in whether or not its slowburn or instant passionate attraction….because the other deep truth about him that I feel is relevant here is that Dick feeds off other people, their energy, what they show him and give him to work with….and his instinct is usually to meet them in kind, give the same energy back, unless say, he makes the conscious decision to override his instincts and power through an antagonistic reception and try and forge a positive bond, like with building his sibling dynamic and mentorship of Damian.

But in regards to his romances, as I said, I think the same instincts might be in play with both Barbara and Kory, but it played out very differently because Babs wasn’t initially drawn to him, not in that way at least. She wasn’t putting forth a romantic energy, and so it took awhile for Dick’s own romantic feelings to emerge and for them to finally be reciprocated in time. In contrast, it was hot and fiery from day one with Kory, because Kory was drawn to him from day one as much as Dick was to her, so there was nothing to slow down or stop those instincts from transforming into attraction and romantic feelings from the second he felt them.

As to the rest of your ask, lololol, sorry to be a cop out, but I don’t think there is a specific physical draw for Dick. I’ve always headcanoned him as bi, which is a bit of projection on my part, sure, but also I just genuinely don’t think gender or even physicality at all has anything to do with what draws to a person, or makes him attracted to them. Yeah, sure, I think he absolutely has physical attributes he loves and might put forth as their best attribute for any partner he’s with, but I think its different with each person because Dick is all about individuality….not just with himself and his own independence, but just….people aren’t interchangeable for him. At any level, I think. 

Every person who’s important to him is uniquely distinct in his mind, and I think with his romantic partners, this results in him liking something distinct about them physically, that separates them in his mind from any other partners he’s had. Because I don’t think its physical appearance that’s Dick’s primary source of attraction with his partners….he’s attracted to them first, and then he settles on something physical that’s uniquely attractive to him as well, that’s different in his mind from anyone else.

Because I think the thing that draws Dick to people in all forms of his relationships, but is particularly true and evident in his romantic partners…..is Dick is both drawn and attracted to competence, skill, power, intellect….all the things that make someone hardy. Durable. A survivor in the context of the world of superheroics that he lives in, specifically.

He’s drawn to people he feels he’s less likely to lose. And he’s attracted to people that this is equally true of, and even moreso, to the degree where he doesn’t feel any need to protect them….not because he doesn’t want to, but because it isn’t relevant. He feels and trusts that they’re more than capable of protecting themselves just as well if not better than he ever could.

And he knows better than anyone that nothing’s a guarantee, and even as he surrounds himself with family and friends and romantic partners that all have in common the fact that they’re incredibly skilled, capable and powerful…enduring…..he still knows that doesn’t mean he can’t lose them, that he won’t lose them. And thus IMO they all wind up in distinct categories in his mind.

His family, he’d kill for. His friends, he’d die for. And his romantic partners, the thing that makes him attracted to them, rather than just drawn to them, are those that he has no doubt would kick his ass for ever presuming to do either of those things for them, because they’re more than capable of taking care of themselves, thanks ever so much. He’s attracted to people he feels safe around, in the sense that he’s not always on guard, always worried about losing them, because he trusts in their ability to endure, survive, and thrive. And that he also can relax around, in the sense that he’s not always feeling like its on him to protect them, defend them, that he has to be always to be on guard or watching out for…because its not his job to protect them and it doesn’t have to be, because there’s nothing he can do for them that they can’t do for themselves and wouldn’t prefer to be left to them. And thus with them he can just…be.

Dick Grayson IMO is attracted to one type of person and one type only: his equals in body, mind and spirit. The ones he can stand beside and not feel dwarfed by or lost in their shadow, and at the same time never have to look back to make sure they’re following him because he knows they’re right there next to him keeping up. He’s attracted to those who challenge him, intellectually, emotionally, that he respects on every level, but who respect him on every level too…..with this part being especially key, and the problem he’s had in his canon relationships - they ONLY fall apart on his end of things, make him lose faith in the relationship, when he feels disrespected, that they’re not valuing him or his capabilities or contributions. 

Dick KNOWS his own worth, which is why he’s such a unique blend of confidence and insecurity….he can weather a whole society of people looking down on him because he knows their opinion doesn’t mean shit to him, but still be stricken with insecurity when he feels someone whose opinion he DOES value, like a romantic partner, family or friend, seems to question his worth or what he’s capable of. 

Dick and Kory are my preferred canon relationship because when they’re ALLOWED to work without editorial mandate to break them up or keep them apart, they embody this most fully for me. Because Kory is massively more powerful than Dick, but never regarded Dick as anything other than her equal in the field in spite of that. There was no question that they both regarded each other as fellow warrior spirits that they trusted to have their back in battle above all others. Kory and Dick work so well for me, because with everything else I said kept in mind, they SHOULDN’T work, not as total equals, and yet they DO. There SHOULD be a power imbalance there, and yet there never was. Not one that was felt, anyway, and not one that was ever in any way responsible for any of their romantic problems. Their issues were disagreements born of competing ideologies….but that both felt equally strongly about. Or issues of trust but only that were externally imposed by brainwashing and shapeshifting and bad shitty writing and editorial mandate that I’ll be ranting about on my deathbed. 

BUT I DIGRESS.

Anyway, enough rhapsodizing about Dick and Kory, lol, like that’s anything new. I mean, I could insert rhapsodizing about the potential for Dick and Kyle based on all of the above and other reasons, but that’s nothing new either. And also, whoops, this got super fucking long.

OH UNKNOWABLE UNIVERSE, WHO COULD HAVE FORESEEN SUCH A THING.

[pinkrival]

anonymous said: Do you ever wonder about when Opal passes away and Bede thinks he'll be all alone again like after his parents and Rose left him but then Hop, Marnie, Victor/Gloria and his gym trainers all comfort him and he realises he's not?

               i have actually seen a handful of fanfics that attempt to tackle how bede will react to opal’s passing. though surprisingly, i don’t think i’ve read any of them?      ( i have to be in a specific mood for sad!fics — and even then, i only like hurt with substantial comfort to balance it out. )

               i would like to imagine by that time in his life, bede would be at a much more stable point — in general, but also      ( most importantly ) emotionally speaking. throughout the vast majority of swsh’s plot and beyond, bede has deep abandonment issues — bede desperately wants the validation of an adult figure. being informed his family gave him up, no matter what their intentions, left him with a hole he spent years desperately scrambling to fill.      ( bede was told ❝ your parents couldn’t take care of you. ❞ bede heard ❝ you were too much of a burden for your parents to bother with. ❞ ) however, i think his attitude of being the only one to decide how he lives is actually the first step to healing from this trauma in a healthy, and most importantly, independent way.

               bede’s bond with opal is different from his bond with rose. this is drifting a bit into personal interpretation territory, but i believe rose wasn’t aware of just how much bede looked up to him — depended on him, even.      ( emotionally, even more than financially. ) rose was the first person who ever gave bede so much as a scrap of faith, and bede took that and immediately centered his entire world around him in the hopes of filling that familial void. was it unhealthy? YES. but bede honestly didn’t know any better, and rose both didn’t know and wasn’t prepared to give him the attention he needed.

               opal, meanwhile, is another story. for starters, opal was always aware of bede’s emotional vulnerabilities. she could see right through him from the moment they met. however, opal took on a mentorship role — much like rose, but different in that she actually guided him. she never left bede in a position where he felt like he needed to scramble for every bit of acknowledgement and attention. she encouraged bede to grow, to become more independent and forge his own path for himself and himself alone. their bond is unique in that it has an element of communication as well as mutual respect and understanding that his bond with rose was tragically lacking in. opal respects bede to make his own decisions. bede respects opal to accept her advice and guidance.

               so, what does any of this mean in the context of your question?

               bede wouldn’t feel abandoned by opal. would he be absolutely heartbroken by her passing? yes, of course. but i think he would be at a point in his life where he would be able to look past that and understand it wasn’t done out of choice.      ( different from rose and especially his parents — who very much did make a conscious choice to leave him. ) would he be afraid of being alone again? yes, of course. though i’d like to think that fear would be based out of a more irrational, knee-jerk reaction rather than something bede genuinely believes — and he’d be able to recognize that much and reel himself in accordingly.

               and yes, he’d absolutely have hop and marnie and gloria and the gym trainers — he’d likely have all of ballonlea at his side. but it was only through getting to know opal in the first place that bede learned how to be someone independent and capable of living for himself. in his mind, the best way to honor opal’s memory would be to stay strong and keep moving forward, just like she taught him to. strangely, bede would probably be more accepting of opal’s death than most.

               he still keeps her picture in the gym and throws a party every year on her birthday. it starts out small — just a tiny affair between people who were close to her — but eventually all of ballonlea comes out to celebrate. it’s not a somber event and it shouldn’t be — bringing everyone together is what opal would have wanted.

[aspoonofsugar]

How has Levi Ever been rewarded by being a "mentor" to the young generation? I don't think Levi even Is the "mentor" type of character, not voluntarily at least. He just tells them what he Thinks and wether they learn from it or not, that is Their choice. I have Never seen Levi Actively trying to Teach the kids something, he just says what is on his mind. We haven't seen Levi and Mikasa interact At all post TS, but i think her outlook on him is the same it was before-mistrust and distaste.

Hello anon!

I have talked of Levi’smentorship of the 104th here.

Levi’s role as a mentor figurefor Eren and Mikasa especially is pretty much established in the Female Titanarc where he tells Eren one of the most important lines in the series:

And where he stops Mikasa frommaking a fatal mistake which would lead her to lose a person she cares for.

His interaction with Mikasaespecially is the first instance of how violence is what leads Levi to losepeople and to have trouble communicating with them.

On one hand it were his threatsto Annie which motivated her to make a dangerous gamble in order to saveherself from being mercilessly tortured. Basically, if Annie had some doubtsabout letting herself being devoured by titans, Levi solved them by assuringher he would not have shown any mercy. The result is of course that he lost hiswhole squad. Immediately after this he meets Mikasa who is motivated by similarfeelings of anger and wishes of revenge and who risks to lose her mostimportant person because of them.

On the other hand Mikasa is notparticularly trusting of him precisely because he beated Eren without restrainduring the trial. In short, his early show of violence, no matter how much itwas planned and necessary, is among the reasons why he has trouble gettingthrough to Mikasa.

In short, after losing his squad,he is given the chance to help a young and talented new soldier and to stop herfrom going through a similar loss, but in order to do so he needs to establisha positive relationship with her which he has trouble creating in that instanceprecisely because of an earlier manifestation of violence he had displayed.

So, since the very first arc Leviappeared in, it is established how he is there in order to help and to guidethe protagonists and how violence and anger are what gets in the way.

You can see how this same patternrepeats in the Uprising as I covered in this meta.

During that arc Levi not beingable to communicate with Historia without violence is what leads to a strain inhis relationship with his squad:

Note that the situation couldhave gone pretty dire if it wasn’t for Mikasa taking Levi’s side and invitingthe others to make a definite choice. And why did she do so? It surely wasn’tonly because of Levi’s strength since the last time she saw him in action shestill disobeyed his orders and almost got herself killed. It is obviouslybecause from her past experience with him she has learnt Levi is trust-worthyand not as the world’s strongest man, but as a person.

Similarly, there is anotherperson who takes Levi’s side in that situation and which tries to mitigate thenegative impact of his actions and that person is Reeves to whom Levi had justshown his kinder side:

So, once again Levi’s tendencyfor violence strained his relationships, but the fact he had shown somecharacters his caring and most competent side made so they avoided worst casescenarios.

In short, as I explained in the two metas Ilinked:

1)     Leviis a mentor figure for all the members of the 104th since he has givenimportant advices to almost all of them and he has been the veteran theyinteracted with the most.

2)     Hisarc has not been about him becoming stronger physically, but about him beingable to show empathy and to communicate. This is why he didn’t get to killKenny, but to talk with him and this is why him helping Erwin didn’t consist inhim killing the beast titan, but in him understanding what Erwin was goingthrough and helping him to make the best choice and later on in letting Erwindie.

If you put the two previouspoints together and consider the theme about letting the children out of theforest, then I think that Levi helping the younger generation to overcome thecurrent situation by being a support might be a satisfying ending to his arc.That said, we really have to see if he manages to survive his currentpredicament and if so in which condition.

Finally, I am sorry, but Idisagree with your takes on both Levi and Mikasa.

Levi has clearly offered adviceon multiple occasions and nobody forced him to do so, so yeah, in thosecircumstances he was actively trying to help and to communicate something. Ifthose interactions weren’t important they would have just been skipped. Let’salso underline how a mentor figure doesn’t need to have the people they aremeant to mentor take classes in order to fulfill their role. All they need isbeing people more expert than their mentees and people their mentees want tobecome to an extent and from whom they can learn and Levi is exactly this. Forexample, you can easily consider Erwin Armin’s mentor despite the two of thembarely interacting because Armin felt inspired by Erwin, learnt from him andtried to emulate him.

As far as Mikasa is concerned,her behaviour in the Uprising clearly shows that her opinion of Levi hasimproved because if that weren’t the case you can bet she would have refused aplan in which Eren was used as bait. She accepted it instead, despite notliking it, and, even after Levi acted violently towards Historia, she statedthe best thing all of them could do was to obey Levi’s orders. This is verydifferent from her wishing to beat Levi up and distrusting him in the FemaleTitan arc.

Thank you for the ask.

[sepublic]

Isaac’s Coming-of-Age Moment

           I find Isaac’s talk with the Captain in Season 3 weirdly… sweet, in a sense?

           Like… I kind of get this vibe from Isaac during their conversation that he’s basically some hot-headed, emotional youth, who is confused in a lot of ways, basically a teenager, and he just really needs some actual guidance, a positive adult/parental figure in his life that he can actually count on! Which, I don’t want to infantilize Isaac, but then again he does refer to himself and Hector as children who need to grow up in Season 4, so maybe I’m not too far off.

           I dunno, I just get the feel that as someone who’s been alone for a LONG while, without any real positive interactions with people or older figures… Isaac’s just in a kind of generally moody, angsty sort of headspace akin to an angsty teenager, obviously unreasonable in some regards, but not truly, his feelings are valid and you can tell that by the end of the day, he just wants to be left alone and in peace.

           So it feels really sweet to have Isaac actually like- Talk to an older figure who for once is acting as a mentor, passing on some real wisdom and guidance. The Captain can tell that Isaac needs someone to help him through what is a VERY confusing part of his life, a part that will decide a lot for him –again, like a teenager- and he’s very patiently and considerately advising Isaac; But at the same time, he’s not condescendingly lecturing him either. The Captain shows Isaac a lot of respect and consideration, and is both talking to him as an equal, but also as a mentor if that makes sense.

           And to me, that’s just really nice and heartwarming to watch, because with Dracula also in mind, I’m lowkey getting the impression of Isaac as this like; Jaded youth who secretly yearns for approval by someone for once, we can kind of see this from his abuser in the flashback. 

          Isaac hasn’t quite completely gotten over this, but with the Captain, Isaac can finally get that validation and support that he really needs and craves from an older figure, in a way that isn’t toxic and unhealthy. And I love Dracula and I will always applaud his decision to save Isaac’s life at the end of Season 2, how THAT led to Isaac learning to live for himself, I will forever love that moment even more from now on;

           But I think Dracula and I can both agree that he’s not, like. The healthiest role model nor person for Isaac to look up to, nor dedicate himself towards. Really, nobody is the healthiest person for Isaac to dedicate himself towards, he needs to live for himself after all! So it really was for the best that Isaac had himself cut off from that sort of toxic dependency; Dracula is an ENORMOUS step-up from Isaac’s abuser, sure, but he still represented Isaac’s refusal to really value himself, only just in relation to others.

           Anyhow, I really appreciate that talk where Isaac low-key finds a bit of a Father Figure in the Captain. Maybe I’m just protecting a little, but I found it very endearing how the Captain talks directly to Isaac as a person, in many ways he’s kind of firm and fair, but in a way that shows that he actually CARES about Isaac, and not that he’s just trying to get his own way. 

          Like, the Captain is interested in seeing Isaac prosper, but he’s not toxically dedicating himself to Isaac, the way Isaac would’ve done to Dracula’s memory; And that ability to help others and invest in them, while still being yourself, was no doubt enlightening for Isaac.

           Just… that side-eye glance of Isaac’s bear the end, actually stopping to think and consider, when the Captain tells him that hey, you can be a ruler! An almost endearing kind of immature desire to deny this in a rather “It’s not a PHASE” type of way, but it is in fact clearly getting to him, whether he likes to admit or not, and it’s kind of flustering Isaac. When the Captain gives him no shit but still treats him like a person. In general, all of Isaac’s interactions in Season 3 came from older figures who were a lot more experienced than him, which I think just adds to this idea that… 

          He really is kind of young and inexperienced in a lot of ways. And he really needs some second opinions to surround himself with, perspectives that are at times differing; Which I think is a neat contrast with Carmilla, who mostly relies on an echo chamber of her sisters and isn’t very receptive to different opinions.

           But yeah, Isaac is an utter mood, basically a moody, edgy teenager, who just needs some love and cherishing, some real mentorship and guidance, provided with actual respect and consideration, so he can get through what is an incredibly confusing AND formative period of his life. 

          It makes me all the more happy that it turns out for the best for him, and I really want to see a fic where like; Him and Hector encounter Dracula and Lisa, with all four on healthier terms, and Dracula’s sort of joy at seeing his other two sons being happy and living for themselves like he’d hoped- While Hector and Isaac are lowkey like, “See Dad! See how we’ve really become our own person, isn’t that really cool?” In that sort of excited, endearing way where they show a lot of respect and admiration, and place a lot of faith and trust in Vlad’s opinion. 

          Because even if they aren’t dependent on Dracula’s opinion, it’s still nice to see him validated and swell with pride, to actually see his Forge Masters get along as he’d always hoped. Like a sort of Coming of Age moment where they happily reflect on how much they’ve grown, to people who’d really respect and appreciate it, telling them that hey, your love for me, it paid off- It really meant a lot and I’m happy to tell the both of us that it wasn’t for nothing, it really meant SO much to me and helped, thank you!

           It’s just… Really endearing how we can see Isaac comfortably, in a safe space and level of interaction that isn’t plagued by threat nor violence; Afford to get snappy with someone else, like he can actually express his feelings at the Captain, but he doesn’t have to worry about holding himself to a subordinate level like with Dracula. Isaac can just be himself without having to constantly brace himself for the possibility of conflict or bloodshed, he can just comfortably exist in this space with a stranger and actually, fully, talk with someone who he feels actually gets and understands him on some level.

          Isaac is in a good environment where he can just let himself out, and it’s incredibly refreshing to watch- It was no doubt extremely cathartic to Isaac, I imagine. And it really stands to show that just as Lisa advised Dracula, traveling around the world really can be good for your health, for opening your mind and worldview; So it’s sweet to see that Dracula ended up passing on and applying Lisa’s wisdom to his low-key son, and that wisdom DID end up working out for him in the end! Thanks, Lisa.

         Now I can only imagine Isaac talking to Lisa about this and feeling really grateful, because she ended up inspiring HIM as well… And Lisa just looks wryly at Dracula like, Oh so you DID take my advice, and not only that, passed it onto others as well?

         And THAT just makes me imagine an older Isaac who continues the cycle of not abuse, but growth and guidance, who sees himself later on in another angry youth who reminds him a lot of himself, and then guides them to be more constructive- Because believe it or not, this wise King DOES understand what it’s like.

         He chuckles to himself when he realizes how the tables have turned, how HE’s the one giving The Talk to some kid, and he kindly, nostalgically, gratefully reflects on the Captain’s wisdom, and how it lives on through him and now this youth. Isaac and the kid are not so different and this realization of similarity and common ground just helps Isaac with accepting that human part of himself, and reaching out compassionately.

         Isaac is joked with and given much-needed fun and levity, while still taken seriously and respected as an individual; And I’m sure it means a lot to him, not that he fully realizes it yet. The Captain really expresses faith and belief in Isaac to grow up and support others through his own wisdom, the Captain sees himself in Isaac and that’s really fascinating- How this stranger is acting on this empathy to talk to Isaac and relate to him, to humanize him as a person for once. And it’s kind of shocking for Isaac to realize that others can actually relate to and see themselves in him, this alleged ‘monster’ and ‘thing’.

         It’s just neat to see an older figure express belief and expectation in Isaac to be something good because he thinks the best of him, rather than Isaac dedicating his belief to someone else, and it kind of inspires and incentivizes Isaac to do better with his life. That maybe he CAN grow and this isn’t the end for him, and one day teach others- Because maybe he DOES have something valuable to offer! The Captain recognizes Isaac as someone with potential and growth, and the ability to nurture and be positive, and I love that. 

         Especially with how Isaac dedicates himself to Dracula and his ‘wisdom of ages’, only for the Captain to turn around and suggest that Isaac himself has his own knowledge worth passing on, and that’s more than enough reason for Isaac to live for himself, then. It’s very nice to see Isaac lowkey latch onto a positive authority figure and actually be emotionally rewarded for it like he needs and deserves. And it’s even sweeter how Isaac leaves the Captain with an amicable farewell wave, and even AFTER an immediate negative experience, Isaac still decides to do better, showing that his lessons really can apply and retain underneath hardship.

         Isaac is challenged but in a healthy way that he can actually engage with and really apply himself towards, because he is a very clever person, he’s allowed to think and be rewarded for it. And it makes it all the more interesting how Isaac in Season 4 does see himself as a holy figure in a sense, not necessarily out of arrogance I feel, but from a real understanding that he’s worth a lot himself. And now Isaac can embrace happily his own self-value and what he has to offer, and his ability to do good, that maybe he ISN’T a monster but in some ways a hero, imagine that!

           (Actually, maybe Castlevania really IS a Coming-of-Age tale in a sense. Hector and Isaac’s growth are obvious, we know Trevor and Alucard is admittedly kind of emotionally stunted teenagers who learn to open up and trust, and even Sypha has her moments where she sees how the world can really suck –like the end of Season 3- before deciding for herself to have agency and initiative, and not be a bit player in someone else’s story regardless, in addition to openly defying some Speaker traditions like a rebellious teenager, because good for her! A narrative about really learning to take initiative and control of your own story, to live life for yourself, DOES seem very Coming-of-Age now does it?)