#himbo maker

[fredwkong]

Himbo Maker: Misha

Misha was an Egirl: a European Guy In Real Life. He would do his makeup, put on fake eyelashes, a wig, and a pair of pink headphones with kitty cat ears, and stream video games online. He loved to troll new viewers by spending an hour or so doing a breathy, feminine voice, and then suddenly hit them with his natural Baltic baritone. The way the chat went crazy made it worth it every time.

The whole game was helped by how petit and curvy Misha had always been. Even in his twenties, he still had a soft, almost girlish body and stood at most of other guys’ sternums. Too bad he wasn’t a trans girl, or at least a gay boy, he sometimes thought, looking at his body in the mirror. Gay guys were supposed to go for little guys who looked like him.

One evening, Misha was just starting his stream when some user started acting really weird in chat. He had a username that almost seemed familiar to Misha, but the guy he was thinking of had always been polite and given insightful comments on Misha’s gaming. This guy’s messages were full of typos, and he couldn’t seem to stop talking about his muscles.

Misha was just about to ban the guy when an alert sounded: Misha’s charming, girly laugh, which indicated a user had just donated a hefty sum. Of course, it was this annoying brodude.

“Uh,” said Misha, almost forgetting to put on his femmy voice, “He says, “Bro, this guy liek wants to chat wiht u on stream.” And there’s a link in the donation.”

Clicking the link, Misha found himself looking at a chat website he’d never seen before. “Hold on, let me share my screen,” he simpered, sharing the chat window. Somehow, his usual screen name was already in the bar. It must have populated from his stream.

Mish-kittycat: Like, heyoooo! You okay with being on stream with me? (✿◠‿◠)

Himbo_mkr: No way, bruh! I love meeting new bros. Like, hi stream!

Misha was a bit offended that this chat partner would refer to him as a “bro.” But stream chat seemed interested, so he thought it could be worth a few minutes to humour the donater. It had been a fair amount of money.

Mish-kittycat: What do you want to talk about UwU

Himbo_mkr: Bro, you know that all I ever talk about are my sick gains and going out with guys, lmao

Okay, so this was a troll. They probably wanted to get Misha banned for lewdness or something. Still, at least it was original that the troll character was a gay guy. He rolled his eyes at the stream and said, out loud in his girl voice, “Looks like someone got mad enough to pay to speak with all this.” He gestured down his slim body in tonight’s outfit, a stereotypical Japanese maid costume.

Himbo_mkr: Huhuhu, bro, you clicked on the link. Didn’t force you to do it.

Misha froze. Of course the troll was watching the stream. “Heh, I don’t let meatheaded bullies boss me around,” he chirped, trying to save face.

Himbo_mkr: You sure? You sure like it when your chat bosses you around, bro.

Now this guy was just lying. Misha scowled, even though he knew the expression would make his foundation crack unattractively. “This is a really weird way to bully someone.” He looked at the stream chat, waiting for his subscribers to back him up.

But the character of the chat seemed to have changed. No, they had always been bossy, Misha suddenly remembered. They would tell Misha how to play his games all the time while he pretended to struggle. It was a key part of the dynamic of his channel that chat bossed him around, and right now they were telling him to go back to chatting with this guy. One guy even messaged, “No more talking, kitty. You’re only allowed to write in the chat.” Misha gave the camera a plaintive look, but listened. He always listened to his chat.

Mish-kittycat: So maybe you’re right about that one thing, but coming in here being rude is totally uncool (งᓀ‸ᓂ)ง

Himbo_mkr: Bro, I think we got off on the wrong foot. I was just tryna compliment you on your sick bis, dude.

Misha cocked his head, confused. He was the opposite of buff, that was why he was so good at dressing as a girl. But as he continued to think about it, he remembered all the hours he spent working on his arms. He kept a set of weights next to his bedroom door, and he did bicep curls to failure every time he went through the doorway. Yeah, his biceps were his pride and joy, and they were usually how he showed off his manliness when he revealed his deep voice and accent.

A tip came in. “Flex for us, kitty,” commanded the text-to-speech voice. With a smirk, Misha lifted up one of his arms, feeling it stretch the sleeve of his maid costume as the veins popped. Too bad the rest of his body hadn’t followed his arms and gotten bulky.

Himbo_mkr: We’re all waiting for you to drop your lifting routine, bro! You’ve been totally blowing up.

Misha blushed at the flattery. His physique wasn’t all that impressive. Sure, now that he thought about it, he had been really hitting the weights a lot and eating right. In fact, his room seemed to be full of lifting clothes and supplements as he looked around. But that was because some of his subscribers kept telling him to get to the gym and hit his macros. It had actually been really freeing to just let people pay to tell him what to do on his fitness journey. And it was paying off! Misha definitely couldn’t pass for a girl these days, which was why the channel had changed to be more about doing stuff in-game for the highest bidders.

The maid costume barely wrapped around Misha’s broad pecs, and the garters had torn when he’d tried to pull them up his thick thighs. Sure, it had been funny when the stream started and the chat had gotten Misha to show off his shoulder raises while dressed in a little maid skirt, but the polyester was really starting to chafe on his smooth muscles. It was a relief when a tip rolled in while Misha flexed and said “Kitty, wear comfy clothes.” The chat oooohed and aaaahed as Misha shucked the maid costume, showing off his bulky chest, and pulled on his favourite comfy shirt instead. Sure, it had some tears and stuff, but as a masculine guy, Misha wasn’t worried about dressing up fancy or anything.

The guy whose chat Misha was streaming had been quiet, so Misha hopped back over and sent another message.

Mish-kittyhunk: Thanks man! It’s all about trusting the process.

Himbo_mkr: I can tell that you trust people, bro! You’re like a puppy lmao.

Well, Misha thought, maybe he did like getting bossed around in chat, but it wasn’t like he trusted everyone blindly! Okay, well, maybe he did tend to stop to help people on the road and then lose his wallet a lot. They looked like they needed help! And maybe he did sometimes click on links that meant he needed to take his phone to the store for them to fix, but so did everyone else!

Looking at the chat, who were all laughing about Misha being a totally trusting puppy, Misha had to finally agree. That was why one of his subscribers had gotten him this headset with floppy dog ears on it, after all.

Mish-puphunk: Haha, you got me, dude! That’s why I clicked on this link, too XD

Himbo_mkr: It’s okay, bro. Lots of gay hunks are pretty dumb, it just adds to that himbo appeal.

This time this guy was definitely making stuff up. Misha was totally straight, he just didn’t do well with girls. Well, that and being a submissive hunk online mostly attracted a gay male fanbase. And, well, now that he thought about it, when was the last time Misha had really thought about a girl? Like, maybe if it was a domme? But no, even then, Misha would really prefer a guy to be involved at some point. This guy was probably right, Misha was gay.

It was super hard to think. There was a reason that Misha preferred to let chat do the thinking for him. Even before he realised how much he loved to listen when men told him what to do, Misha had never been much of a deep thinker. That was why most of the stuff in his room was gym gear, gaming stuff, or whatever his subscribers bought for him. Lately, they had been really loving when Misha wore even less clothes and showed off more of his growing body, and Misha was happy to oblige as long as they kept telling him what to do!

Mish-puphunk: Lol I guess you’re right! I just wanna give sirs what they want

Himbo_mkr: Bro, I totally get why you love pup play so much. You just love being obedient and dumb and empty lmao. You, like, pretty much live in your mask these days.

A pup mask…Misha was pretty sure one of his subscribers had sent him one of those once, but it had been really confusing to put on and he’d only worn it once. No, wait, that wasn’t right. Misha was such a ditz! He’d loved the experience of putting on the pup mask and letting himself be a dumb pup for his chat. And chat had loved sending in tips to give him commands like “sit,” “roll over,” and “stick a tail in your hole.”

It had been so popular that the subscribers had told Misha to make it a weekly thing, then a biweekly thing, and by now it had pretty much become what Misha did during his streams. While chatting with this guy had been fun, Misha really wanted to get on with the stream and mask up. He opened his mouth to tell the viewers that, but then remembered that he had been ordered not to talk. Too bad, chat would only hear his deep, resonant voice if they ordered him to bark after he put on his mask.

Mish-puphunk: Okay dude, I gotta go be a good dumb pup now.

Himbo_mkr: Got it, bruh! You got a bunch of hunky doms to please by being a good pup slut!

Chat cheered as Misha stopped streaming the chat window and winked at the camera. An especially hung dom who loved to tip had won the bid war last night to decide what Misha wore, so Misha fondled the straps of his leather harness as he got up to grab his mask. He wondered what his chat full of muscular, horny himbo doms would have him do today.

Misha slipped on the mask and let his mind go blank.

[lifeiskickingmyass]

Y'all the callback to the movie night vs. pillow fight line from season 1... my heart

[thatlittleegyptologist]

'Khonsu wasn't at work because he's brewing beer. He's the new Ea Nasir'

he wasn't at work because brewing beer for festivals was actually a community thing and he would have been assigned to do it. also his wife was sick, so he was doing her household tasks while she recovered.

ea nasir sold shitty copper as a scam

they are not the same

[hqmillioncorn]

FFXIVWrite Day nine: Fair

with @windupnamazu 's Butter, Pancake and Cinnamon and a non copyright @windupiceheart B'ig nunh

Cinnamon watched as Butter continued to watch the rain outside. It had only been a few days since their parents had left again, this time leaving him taking care of his new younger sister. Right now she was sleeping so Butter was occupying his time by waiting to see if his parents were coming back. Cinnamon couldn't bear to watch this anymore. "Hey Butter!" She flew over to the table and placed a simple napkin in the middle. "Let's play a game together! I betcha I'm gonna win!!" The sound of overconfident bell chimes caught Butter's attention and he walked over to see what Cinnamon was doing.

Babycorn turned her head, as another flash of thunder illuminated the room. She counted the seconds it took for the loud KRACK to sound. It took about twelve seconds this time, which meant that the storm was about twelve malms away.

There was just something about storms that always made her nervous. Maybe it was the days she spent in weather just like this when she was younger while she wondered to herself if her parents would ever come home. 

These kinds of days would make her so nervous she hardly ever left her room during one. And if a storm happened to catch her when she and Cherry were out doing something, Babycorn’s instincts would have them teleported back home without a second thought. 

So she was a little surprised with herself when she had accepted Butter and Pancake’s invitation to play board games with them in their room. 

Then again, Cherrypit had really wanted to go so Babycorn couldn’t bring it in her heart to tell him no. 

There was another flash of thunder and another instance of Babycorn counting to herself until the KRACK sound. She covered her ears with a pillow to drown out most of the sound.

Butter noticed this and didn’t hesitate in suggesting to Pancake and Cinnamon that they play a board game in Babycorn’s room instead. 

This idea was met with unanimous agreement and a pair of knowing stares from both Cinnamon and Pancake. 

“You know Babycorn so well Butter! Almost like there isn’t ten pages in a row in your diary talking about how pretty she is. Heh.”

“Woooow! You’re so considerate, Butter. I’ve taught you well. It brings a tear to my small fairy eyes.” 

Butter cheeks blushed a deep red. “Maybe so.” He then hurriedly turned and ran over to the corner where he knew Babycorn kept most of her games. Cherrypit followed behind Butter with an excited screech. Something that sounded like, “ButtsButssBUtsss!!!  Like! Bebe! Bebebebe!!!” 

Babycorn’s ears were still covered by a pillow so she missed most of what everyone said. 

After digging around Babycorn’s games and toys Butter came back empty handed but Cherrypit had come back carrying a board game that she had bought a few months back while walking around Mor Dhona. She hadn’t had the chance to play with it yet and had mostly been using it as a makeshift plate for when she couldn’t find an actual plate for her food. 

As Cherrypit slammed the board game onto the ground in the middle of everyone, Butter and Pancake and Cinnamon all figured that this may as well happen.

The board game that Babycorn had bought on sale was none other than “B’ig Nunh in: The Game of Love!  A completely accurate and totally legal board game all about being B’ig Nunh and finding love in a loveless world! It’s up to you to find true love or lose it!” 

And yes, that was the full title. 

Babycorn scratched out a ketchup stain from the B’ig Nunh on the top of the box. “I always wanted to play this! But I always forget about it!” She opened the box and picked out a yellow piece, it was in the shape of B’ig’s moogle hat. “Haha! Doesn’t it look funny! It’s not supposed to be this small!!” 

Butter laughed at her joke while the others took the board out and picked their pieces. 

Cinnamon had of course chosen red, Pancake chose green, Babycorn had already taken yellow, Butter took blue and of course that left Cherrypit with pink. 

“Pink! Pink!” Cherrypit cheered, “Bebe look!” He proudly showed his pink piece in the shape of a heart to Babycorn. 

Another flash of thunder stopped Babycorn from complimenting her brother’s choice in color.

Though the game proved to be a little hard to figure out at first, since it turned out that Babycorn had lost the instructional manual that came with the game. By the powers of Pancake and Butter’s teamwork, they managed to come up with their own rules on how to play. 

It was something that both siblings did all the time when they played together, either back at their home or in the mansion. 

Now the game was just a few turns from having a winner between Babycorn, Pancake, Cinnamon, or Cherrypit.

Poor Butter had already been kicked out of the game earlier after a bad dice roll had ended up with B’ig ruining his expensive suit by falling into a puddle of mud. Then he had ended up with a card that told him that he cried all the way home and just decided to play video games. 

Butter didn’t really mind, he was content with watching and occasionally moving the piece around the board for Pancake and handing out the cards to the other people still playing. And nobody seemed to mind that he was occasionally shuffling them, so he was content. 

Especially since they were all happy together.  

“Dammit!!! You can’t do this to me!!” 

Well. 

Most of them.

There was no way for Babycorn and Cherrypit to ever have known just how competitive Cinnamon got during these things. Even Pancake, who couldn’t even understand what she was saying, knew that these sorts of games always got Cinnamon heated. 

Something about the aggressive bell chiming sort of gave it away.

Butter tapped Cinnamon’s small shoulder as gently as he could, “Cinnamon…! Watch your language!” He whispered to her. 

“Huh? Oh come on Butter.” She landed on the board and moved her piece closer to the library where B’ig was supposed to trip in front of his crush, “No one here but you and Cherrypit can understand what I’m saying anyway.” Cinnamon sneered. 

“That’s exactly why you have to watch your language!” 

Butter did not want a repeat of the incident where Cherrypit had overheard Cinnamon calling Hildibrand a ‘Piece of shit’ and repeating the phrase all over the mansion to everyone who ran into him.

“Fiiiiiiiiiiiiine.”

Cinnamon’s promise lasted a whole four minutes, as soon as Babycorn had moved Cherrypit’s piece to a square that let B’ig have his date ride on his shoulders into the sunset. 

“What the HELLS?!” Cinnamon flew over to the piece and angrily stared at it before flying over to where Babycorn sat. “You can’t fool me! I know that roll was only six spaces and you moved him seven!!” Cinnamon wings were flapping so fast that some of her dust was flying all over Babycorn. 

Who still couldn't understand a single word that Cinnamon was saying.

“Hi Cinnamon!” Babycorn beamed. The dust was kind of tickling her nose but in a nice way. 

(Little did she know that Babycorn was not cheating, just bad at counting.)

By now Pancake had been living with Cinnamon for so long that even with the barrier of not being able to understand what she was saying, she still understood what she was doing. 

“Wow! Cinnamon, he's really kicking your butt! I think you should just give up!” Pancake was actually in third place so she didn’t have much to lose herself.

“I’ll never surrender!!” Cinnamon dramatically declared. 

“Are you really going to gamer rage against a two-year-old?” Butter asked, gesturing at Cherrypit who was too busy chewing on a block of steel to pay attention to the game.  

“They gotta learn early that life isn’t fair!” 

Butter looked at Cherrypit, then back at Cinnamon.

“...I-In the sense of board games I mean!” 

As Pancake finished her roll, which landed B’ig in the gardens of some illustrious palace, she handed the dice over to Cinnamon. “Your turn Cinnamon!” Pancake knew that Cinnamon was taking this way too seriously but it was still kind of funny to hear so many rapid bell chimes from her after Cherrypit landed a good roll. 

And there was nothing Cinnamon could do about it.

“Haha!” Cinnamon took the huge pair of dice in comparison to her size and held them up above her head. “Watch this! The winning roll!” She threw the dice down with the amount of confidence one would have taking on a hoard of enemies by themselves while wearing a blindfold. 

The dice bounced over the board, once, twice, then stopped. Right on a pair of twos, which gave Cinnamon four spaces to move ahead. 

Right on the same square of mud that Butter had landed in earlier.

“NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!”

Cinnamon fluttered to the ground in defeat and laid there. 

As if someone had just smacked her with a metaphorical fly swatter.

Butter and Pancake burst out laughing. It was always funny how Cinnamon acted when she lost, especially after spending the whole game boasting about how she was going to win and going on long (bell-chiming) tangents on how she was the master of this game, only to end up completely losing by the end and lying on the board in defeat. 

Cinnamon opened one of her eyes to make sure that her plan was working. 

Babycorn was unfamiliar with what was going on. “Is she okay?” There was some concern on whether she would have to go and pull out her staff and cast a regen on Cinnamon or not. 

Butter wiped a tear from his eye. “Don’t worry! She does this all the time.” 

He gave Cinnamon a small pat on her head with his finger, “Cinnamon’s really competitive so sometimes she can get a little dramatic when she loses…” Not that Butter didn’t feel a little sorry for her but most of the time Cinnamon bounced right back without a problem anyway. Just as feisty as she always was. 

“Oh! Airys the same way!” 

Another flash of thunder burst into the room. The KRACK this time sounded almost right after the flash. 

Butter stood frozen, waiting to see if Babycorn was going to react. 

Instead she just grabbed the dice off the board and rolled them. The pillow on her head dropped to the ground and landed right on Cherrypit. “Phew…” Butter was just glad he could help her feel better. It was really nice to see Babycorn smile. 

“Pfft-Yeah I bet it is.” Cinnamon was now lounging on the board, a smug expression on her face. 

Butter began to panic, “I didn’t say that outloud did I…?!” Had Babycorn heard?! Would she even understand what he meant?! Had Babycorn heard?!?!!?

“No dude, I just know that look on your face.” Cinnamon sat up and put her sleeves together. “Your eyes always get this biiiig and your face gets pink and your mouth moves over this way whenever you’re thinking about Babycorn.” She flew up next to Butter, keeping her facial expression the same. 

“Like, just kiss already.” 

“Cinnamon!”  

Cinnamon sat on one of Butter’s hair spikes as they all watched Cherrypit make the presumably winning roll. Only to be met by the reason this board game was probably in the clearance section. 

Pancake read the card outloud, when even she couldn’t believe what she had read.

“You’ve won the game of love but B’ig Nunh died. Sorry.” 

She put the card down without another word, “Wow! That sucked.” Why would B’ig Nunh ever endorse something like this?

“It was really fun while it lasted!” Butter tried to put a positive spin on things but it was really hard when this was the same B’ig Nunh that had allegedly broken Babycorn’s heart years ago. “Maybe we can make some better rules for this game?” he wondered to himself.

“Yeah!” Pancake was suddenly much more motivated than ever. “Like we can make it about going on a quest to find a cursed book full of curses or something!!” 

“Isn’t that changing the game completely?” Cinnamon added, forgetting that there was nothing she could do to stop Pancake. 

As Pancake rushed off to her room to get some construction paper and markers, Cherrypit ran after her but not before stopping right at the door and turning around back to Butter, Cinnamon and his sister. 

He raised his arms and let out a loud, “Sonofabitch!” Then ran right after Pancake. 

Cinnamon slowly flew her way out of Butter and Babycorn’s view as they both glared right at her.

[persephoneggsy]

i’ve decided that Bayani and Sebastian are also friends

i am gonna give that choir boy all the friends

whenever Clan Lavellan came close to human settlements, Bayani always volunteered to go and trade with the merchants. he’s very fascinated by human culture and loves their large, elaborate, and densely-packed cities.

they passed by Starkhaven a few times; the first time, Bayani went into the city, like usual, and wound up accosted by some city guards who accused him of stealing. he tried to defend himself, but things were quickly deteriorating... until a nobleman sauntered onto the scene and told the guards off. 

the guards were sufficiently cowed, and Bayani thanked the stranger... who was then also accosted by a pair of royal guards who were after him -- because surprise! he’s the youngest son of the Prince of Starkhaven! wanting to repay the favor, Bayani grabbed the noble -- Sebastian, obviously -- and they ran through the city evading the guards, having a blast the entire time.

since that fateful day, every time Clan Lavellan came close to Starkhaven, Bayani always made it a point to go and visit Sebastian. they’d go to taverns to party, be each other’s wingmen, and go hunting together. of course, many in Clan Lavellan disapproved, and Sebastian’s parents thought it very inappropriate for their son to go traipsing around with an elf. neither of them really cared, though.

then one day, Bayani goes into the city but can’t find Sebastian. instead, he’s informed by the servants at the palace that he was sent away to the chantry. he never found out which chantry, but he always kept an ear out, hoping to reunite with his friend.

and they do reunite, years later -- when Clan Lavellan stops by Sundermount to offer help to Clan Sabrae, he goes into Kirkwall for the first time and sees a familiar face walking around... Sebastian’s changed in their time apart, but they’re both still delighted to have found each other. 

(and Bayani absolutely teases Sebastian about his incredibly obvious crush on Hawke)

[sailorkamino]

random (soft) bad batch headcannons

a/n: a lot of these are based on the batch being neurodivergent!

• from oldest to youngest is 99, hunter, wrecker, crosshair, tech

• tech was bullied the most as a cadet since he was the smallest (and mouthiest)

• plus w/o his goggles he can't see well enough to fight back

• his brothers wouldn't let him go anywhere alone

• tech and crosshair have the same dry, sarcastic sense of humor and find each other the funniest batcher

• hunter and wrecker disagree

• if they're in a situation where they have separate rooms hunter always shares w/ crosshair (aka the quietest)

• wrecker and tech share since they don't mind each other's mess

• crosshair or wrecker is always the 1st to notice when hunter is overstimulated

• wrecker is the most emotionally intelligent

• the batch have a rule to never call wrecker dumb or stupid because he's actually really insecure about his intelligence (which is ridiculous, do u know how smart a demolitions expert is?? he's a himbo but he's not an idiot)

• tech prefers info dumping to crosshair cuz he's the best listener

• crosshair loves all his brothers the same but he has a soft spot for tech

• crosshair gets really mad at wrecker for interrupting/ignoring tech cuz it makes tech feel annoying

• then wrecker explains he doesn't cut him off cuz he finds tech annoying, he just has a short attention span

• wrecker likes to see the best in people and can be quite trusting, something that stresses out his protective brothers

• wrecker will physically carry tech away from his work bench if he's not sleeping

• crosshair is the only one who can lie to hunter and get away w/ it bc his heart rate doesn't change

• most of the boys can ignore shit talk but wrecker is somewhat sensitive, making his brothers very protective

• maker help you if you hurt wrecker's feelings

• crosshair and tech would always get hunter to comfort him so they could plot revenge

• losing eyesight is crosshairs worst fear, watching it happen to wrecker broke his heart (he definitely cried on his big brother's chest when they were alone)

• even if they try to hide it hunter can always hear when someone's crying

• hunter tries to stay strong for his batch 24/7 but if he needs comfort, he goes to wrecker

• big guy gives the BEST hugs

• since they were raised very isolated from regs they missed out on a lot of clone culture, they don't speak mando'a

• wrecker loves cuddles!

• hunter and tech have sensory issues so they don't always want to be touched but they usually don't mind it

• as long as it doesn't get in the way of tech's work he'll chill in pretty much any position so wrecker will just use him as a teddy bear

• tech: *reading in bed*

wrecker: *climbs into tech's bunk wordlessly, puts his head against his stomach and wraps around him*

tech: *doesn't stop reading as he pats wrecker's shoulder*

• crosshair is always cold so he doesn't actually mind cuddling but he pretends to hate it

• wrecker hates sparring with crosshair cuz he bites

• crosshair has an oral fixation and used to chew on his shirts w/o realizing it

• would get very embarassed/defensive if anyone brought it up

• tech made lula from scrap fabrics courtesy of 99 when wrecker kept having nightmares

• anytime hunter hears crosshair audibly laughing his stomach drops cuz that usually means someone got hurt (he's a physical comedy guy, what can i say?)

• the hardest crosshair has ever laughed is when wrecker, wearing rocket boots made by tech, flew into a wall

• cross and wrecker are the most playful but in different ways

[wooyoungisbaby]

a fun fact about me is that i will die if i dont sort stuff into pointless categories for no reason. send me a tier list maker of smth i've never even heard of before and you've successfully entertained me for 10 minutes at least.

AH also im saying stupid lovingly and in jest here bc i like to call them himbos

More Ateez memes

! Please reblog :} 

[teabunnee]

YAY AN AFK WRITER 😭 i’ve been so starved. please gimme any hcs you have for lorsan or lucius (in general or x reader hehe) i love them so much

Lorsan 

Lorsan is a dork. But at least he’s your dork!

Whether that’s a good thing or not is up to you. 

Lorsan canonically loves flower crowns, as a child. As an adult, he won’t admit it but should you give him some fresh wildflowers, he melts a bit at the gesture. Maybe he’ll make you a crown, though it might be a bit messy from lack of practice. 

He does his best to woo you with his words. Many of his compliments, however are pure poetry, and he’s an expert in romantic letters to make you swoon, then he ruins it by praising himself too much. 

Don’t be fooled, he’s a romantic at heart. You can see the effort he puts in to sweep you off your feet. 

He enjoys making you blush, sneaking you kisses on the cheek when you aren’t looking. 

If you take your revenge while he’s talking, he continues talking until he registers the kiss and his voice trails off. It’s a great way to get him to stop talking for a bit. 

Dates with the dork are fun! He likes to explore new things with you, or to show you his favorite pretty date spots, he’ll take you to the prettiest, iconic date spots in the Dark Forest, like Lovers’ Wish. (“Though they don’t hold a candle to you, darling”) 

Oh, get ready for the pet names. All of them, sometimes in the same sentence. They get cheesier the more mischievous he’s feeling. 

Lorsan is your protector, should you need it! It’s sometimes difficult to remember that Lorsan is a skilled Windwhisperer and warrior in his own right, but he’s very good at making people remember. 

All of the tension goes out of him when you two are alone, he’ll nuzzle against you, boneless and tail twitching in happiness, kissing your cheek with his lips and his nose. He’s a cuddler, through and through. 

Lucius 

This man be a himbo. A relatively sophisticated and well-bred himbo, but a himbo all the same. 

Dude was straight up missing for two weeks trying to help people. He be himbo

Canonically, most of his advice involves exercise or horses. I don’t think he understands romance. At all. 

Lucius is a noble, so his ideas of romance are kind of centred around what he heard growing up. So he courts you, basically, in his own way. He gives you gifts that are simple, practical and beautiful. Bouquets of flowers, jewellery, whatever you asked for him. Service is also a big thing. He’s your literal knight in shining armour, dude will carry you across the globe princess style should you ask him to. 

he takes you to his favourite restaurants, they are simple, plain fare. Though with how loved he is by his country, the servers and owners always do their best to make it a good experience. 

He’s very sappy, make him something, no matter how stupid or silly it looks, and he wears it with pride in public, proclaiming you as the maker. He gets a bit confused should you get embarrassed. 

He likes taking you on horseback rides, he’s named every single one he’s ever ridden, and remembers their temperaments, so it will always be a pleasant experience for you. 

He won’t talk to you about his troubles, he’s had to keep it to himself so long that it’s tough for him. He’ll open up to you very slowly, after some needling. 

He’s also very hesitant about affection, he won’t initiate it unless you give your permission. He’s very gentlemanly in that regard, though it can be frustrating. 

His kisses are very gentle. He cradles your face in his hands, and gazes at you with such tenderness. His hugs are comforting and very warm, like he's protecting you from the entire world.

[anxiouspineapple99]

Himbo Noodle Soup for the Soul

Pairing: squint and you can see potential hints of 501st x f!reader; - aka if someone wanted to make it smutty they def could. 🩷 …I’d totally read that too

Summary: Your sleazy boyfriend cheats on you and dumps you. But your favorite 501st himbos are coming to the rescue!

HELP IS ON THE WAY DEAR! HELP IS ON THE WAY!

But the boys can’t agree on a gift. So they all get you something different!

Warnings: FLUFF. It’s all fluff. Don’t come for me. I will not be accepting dental bills for tooth rot thx 😜Some talk of sexual transmitted infections, self loathing, self depreciation

Word Count: 2.8k

A/N: This fic absolutely DOES NOT take itself seriously lol. I honestly had no idea it would garner the support it has and frankly I had fun writing it. I love sappy fluff. It fuels my soul. I hope you have as much fun reading it as I did writing it.

This fic was inspired by THIS post! 🩷💖

How could that sleemo do this? Not only did he cheat on you but then he broke up with you via hologram while you were working. A hologram, mind you, that said you should get tested for some STI he picked up from the slag he cheated with. You launched the handheld holoprojector across the supply closet, rage and heartbreak simultaneously fighting for dominance within your stomach. You had an implant that prevented pregnancy and diseases but that inconsiderate, two-timing, laserbrained, e chu ta didn’t know that. How could you be so stupid? You thought he was going to propose. You told everyone as much. This was humiliating. They’ll never let you live this down. They are still taking the piss out of Jesse for that girl from 79s. Obviously you were the problem. He wouldn’t have cheated if you were prettier, smarter, funnier…was it that weird sex thing he wanted to do that you weren’t comfortable with? Bet she did that with him. She was everything you weren’t apparently.

***********

You’d been skulking around the medbay for days now and the boys of the 501st had noticed. Kix realized your usual bubbly greetings you had for him when he entered the medbay had been replaced with a blank stare. You’d been distracted and making mistakes, very unlike you. Fives and Jesse saw the dark circles carved under your puffy red eyes as they passed you in the hallways. You’d stopped laughing at Hardcase’s jokes, now only staring off or giving a halfhearted hum in response. Tup and Dogma found you crying in a supply closet. When you finally stopped joining them for meals in the mess, they decided they needed answers.

“Did we do something? She won’t even look at us,” Fives moved his food back and forth sadly. “Yesterday Dogma and I accidentally bumped into her and she immediately turned and ran crying in the opposite direction. We didn’t even get to apologize,” Tup mumbled as Dogma rested his chin in his hand.

“She doesn’t even laugh at my jokes anymore,” Hardcase whined as he poked the pathetic excuse for breakfast on his tray.

“If you’re talking about who I think you’re talking about, she’s been practically catatonic in the medbay for the last week,” Kix hummed as he and Jesse squeezed in at the table with their brothers.

Rex, who had been silently listening as he worked on reports spoke up, “Her sleemo boyfriend cheated on her and then dumped her over hologram. And told her she needed to get tested for an STI.”

“Kriff…” Fives and Tup mumbled in unison wide eyed in disbelief.

“Hold on, the same guy who called us her…what was it…her ‘work himbos’?” Tup scrunched his nose irritably.

“Maker, what a shabuir. I always thought she deserved better, but this is a whole new low. He can say what he wants about us, I’ll be a work himbo. But he hurt our girl,” Fives growled as he clenched his fist around his fork.

Hardcase slammed his fist on the table, “Where is he? I’ll personally pay him a visit! I’ll show him what this himbo can do!”

“How did you find that out,” Kix leaned into Rex, “I work with her directly and she never confided any of that with me. Last thing she told me she thought he was going to propose.”

“I pulled rank. Told her I was worried about her. She crumbled into a blubbering mess and dumped it all on me and General Skywalker,” Rex shrugged and took a large swig of his caf.

“Cap! Permission to hunt the nerf herder down and put the fear of the 501st in ‘im!” Hardcase was already on his feet. He was itching for a fight and he was ready to show that worthless womprat that no one messed with one of his own.

“Stand down, Hardcase. I don’t need you getting locked up for some scummy nat-born,” Rex sighed, “Besides I may have already offered to put the fear of the Force in him with an unexpected visit and she was adamant that I let it go.”

“Well what can we do? We should help cheer her up,” Tup mused, swirling his cup of caf mindlessly. “Women like Hyellian musical noodles, right? Maybe we can do something with that?” Hardcase mumbled between chewing mouthfuls of food.

“Hardcase that’s the stupidest idea-” Jesse began but Fives interjected holding up his hand, “No. No, he has a point.”

Jesse whipped his head toward Fives, “What point? Fives, no!”

“Fives, yes!” Fives jumped to his feet with chaos twinkling in his eyes.

“Hardcase, yes!” Hardcase followed suit with unbridled elation scrawled into his expression.

“Shut up!” Resounded a synchronized admonishment from Jesse and Kix.

“Jesse is right, ‘Sorry your boyfriend cheated on you and might have given you some weird disease, here are some noodles?’ That is stupid. Women like flowers. She always complained that sleemo never bought her flowers anyway. Flowers say ‘He was a creep but you have us. And we buy your favorite flowers, unlike that walking STI.”

“Flowers? Boring and cliche, much like you my beloved vod.” Fives slung an affectionate arm around Kix who immediately shoved him off with a gruff, “Kriff off Fives. Not boring. Considerate. It shows that I listen to her. And women like being listened to more than Hardcase’s noodles, di’kut.”

“Nah, we should get wine. She loves wine,” Jesse kicked his feet up on the table eliciting a glare from Rex. “Remember a while back when I got totally wasted at 79s and she took me back to her place and took care of me? Once I’d thrown up everything in my stomach and then some, we got to talking and she told me about her favorite wines.”

“Jesse. Boots. Table.”

“Sorry, Captain.”

“Fine. She can drink the wine with the noodles we are getting her, right boys?” Hardcase was not giving up on the idea of noodles no matter what his brothers said. He knew the way to your heart was through your stomach.

“Wait. Isn’t this fraternizing? That’s completely against regulations!” Dogma pressed. A collective groan peppered with “Kriffing Dogma” and “You just had to say something” erupted from the table as all the men turned to look at Rex.

“I already got her something, so you won’t be hearing a word from me,” Rex never looked up from the reports he was poring over.

“Great! That’s settled then, wait… What did you get her, sir?” Fives narrowed his eyes at Rex and drummed his fingers on the table. “Now I can’t tell you that. It would take all the fun out of me watching you all fumble over each other trying to figure out what to get our sweet girl,” a mischievous smile crossed Rex’s lips as he stood up. “But I’ll be giving it to her tomorrow at 1700 hours. So you lot better get a move on. Good luck, gentlemen!” The boys heard Rex chuckling to himself as he walked away. “Good luck, indeed.” Fives’ eyes remained fixed on Rex until he was out of sight.

He sure as hell wasn’t going to let his CO best him at this, “We meet at her apartment tomorrow at 1700 sharp. We’ll see who the best gift giver is then!” After another round of bickering over who was going to find the best gift, the group dispersed. Fives and Tup opted to work with Hardcase, pooling their credits to buy the expensive noodles. Kix, Jesse, and Dogma opted to select their gifts independently.

**********

You were wrist deep in your second tub of ice cream of the evening as you binged holodramas and wallowed in your own self pity on your sofa when someone knocked on the door. You swore under your breath and wrapped your blanket tightly around you as you shuffled to answer.

The door slid open and there were your 501st lads bickering and shoving each other, each one toting an armful of gifts. They froze wide eyed and grinned sheepishly.

“Hey mesh’la! We are here to brighten your spirits!” Fives beamed proudly with an extraordinarily large takeout container and some flowers he had clearly picked from one of the garden boxes outside your apartment building in his hands. You were speechless looking from face to face positively bewildered. Suddenly you were self conscious about what a mess you were, eyes red and puffy, nose runny, hair untamed, potentially chocolate ice cream on your face and you were wearing someone’s blacks, though you couldn’t recall whose. “Hey! I was wondering where those blacks went!” Jesse chortled, “they look better on you cyar’ika.” Okay so they were Jesse’s.

“Boys, w-what is this?” You hugged yourself, an unconscious self soothing habit you’d acquired.

“We heard what happened. With uh…I guess he’s your ex now. We wanted to help you feel better,” Hardcase joyfully ripped the takeout box from Fives’ hands and thrust it toward you. “The noodles were my idea mesh’la! I heard the ladies love Hyellian musical noodles from that restaurant near the Senate! So we had to get you those! Fives, Tup, and I went in on them together for you! Also I got your favorite cookies.” His brilliant smile shining from his eyes even more brightly than his lips as he proudly placed the small bag on the takeout box. For the first time in a week your smile met your eyes, “Hardcase you’re too sweet! I do love noodles and I’ve been meaning to try these for a while now.” Hardcase gave Kix a playful shove, “Told you so, vod!”

Kix rolled his eyes before he held out an exquisite bouquet to you. “Kix, these are…these are my favorite flowers.” His warm smile met his shining amber eyes with a radiance that was unsurpassed even by the twin suns of Tatooine, “Yes, mesh’la. You mentioned once you’d always wanted flowers and that piece of bantha poodoo refused to buy them. But you’re worth all the flowers in the galaxy.”

You sniffed back tears as Jesse stepped toward you with your favorite wine, “Jesse how did you know…” He winked and gave his most charming smile, “You told me that night I stayed here. You know, the one where I got so smashed at 79s and you had to take care of me?” Your eyes widened, “You remembered that?” His only response was a soft kiss to your hand.

Tup leaned around him and handed you a small box the string it was tied with was intricately hand braided. “Tup this looks like the string bracelet I made you,” you tenderly toyed with it, smiling as the soft fibers tickled your fingertips. “I remembered when you showed me how to do it. You said you’d tried to teach that cockalorum once but he told you it was silly. Now we match. I always have mine with me. And those,” he gently tapped the box, “are just some of your favorite candy.”

Dogma shyly slipped you a folded sheet of flimsi. You placed the boxes, flowers, and wine on your end table by the door so you could unfold it. You gasped when you found it was a beautiful sketch of a beach sunset. Dogma flushed as he cleared his throat, “You said once you want to move to a planet with a quiet beach. I just,” his shy smile was one of the most endearing attributes and you loved seeing it now, “I hope this will suffice until you can do that.” “Dogma, it’s exquisite! You drew this? I can’t even imagine how much work this was.” You reached out and squeezed his hand, “I…you went through all that effort just for me?” He shrugged, squeezing you back before bashfully stepping aside.

Fives swaggered up, elbowing past his brothers holding out a messily wrapped package and the freshly plucked flowers. You couldn’t fight the urge to giggle at the sight, “Fives, are these the flowers from the planters outside? This one still has its roots attached.”

“Ahhh maybe? Just open the gift.” Your breath hitched in your throat at the holophoto inside. It was from the most recent deployment, in the medbay on the Resolute; Tup was in the hospital bed, still smiling regardless of his head being freshly wrapped from an injury. Kix was stoically fighting a smile in typical fashion. Hardcase donned his signature beaming grin as he flashed a thumbs up. Dogma was seated next to the bed and there you were. You were atop Fives’ shoulders as Jesse stood next to him, their faces pressed to your thighs. It was a moment you’d wanted to commit to memory forever. A brief glimpse of joy in a seemingly endless war. “These di’kut think I don’t listen, but I do. You were so happy there. I heard you say you wished you could stay like that with us forever. Now you can.” His honeyed voice dropped to a whisper, “You’re special to all of us, sweetheart.” The soft kiss he placed on your nose, a wordless promise that you’d always have a place with them.

Rex, who had been quietly observing, finally stepped through the huddled mass of clones crowded around you. He handed you a small box with a handwritten note. He placed his elbow against your door frame and propped his head on his fist, his gaze soft and affectionate as you read it.

Something to keep with you to remember how loved you are.

Always, Rex.

PS your work himbos never liked him anyway.

You opened the tiny box to see a pair of delicate earrings with little gems that were 501st blue. “Rex, these are incredible. But…these are…I mean. This is so much. I really don’t deserve these. Or any of this really,” your voice was soft, shaking in disbelief at your current situation.

“No? I’d disagree, cyare. In fact every single trooper standing here would disagree with that, wouldn’t you boys?” A chorus of “That’s right, Cap!” and “He’s right cyar’ika!” echoed through the empty hallway. “Besides,” Rex continued, “the ones you’re wearing now are from that scrawny little tit. Correct?” Your nod was barely visible as you stared in awe at the troopers before you. He reached out to tuck a lock of hair behind your ear. “Thought I’d replace those unsightly things with something that reminds you of the real men in your life who actually care about you every time you look in the mirror.”

Your lip trembled looking at the overwhelming display of love you’d received from the boys. Your boys. It was then the dam broke and you could no longer hold back the tsunami of emotions and tears that had been pounding at you all week. “I…you…thank…” you couldn’t form words between the heavy hiccuping sobs. Rex moved in for an embrace. It felt as safe and warm as it had when you’d first confided in him. You pulled back and wiped your face on your sleeve. You inhaled deeply and though your breath was shaking still you were smiling when you looked at the anxious faces quietly watching you, “I can’t possibly eat all of these noodles AND the takeout I already ordered. You boys get in here and we can watch a holofilm while we dig into all the food.”

**********

You and your boys piled on and in front of your sofa until it was just a mess of limbs and laughter and poking and teasing. Once settled you had every trooper touching you in some form, even if it was just a hand resting on your arm, or leg. Rex claimed the spot to your right, his arm lazily resting along the back of the sofa. Kix squeezed in on your left, hands immediately beginning a soothing dance through your hair. Jesse squeezed in behind you, insisting on sharing the middle cushion with you. He positioned you snugly between his thighs. You stopped wiggling when he began drawing soft lazy shapes along your arms, shoulders, and neck with the pads of his fingers, gooseflesh prickled over you followed by a shiver running down your spine. Hardcase and Tup rested their elbows on your thighs and stroked the insides of your legs while ignoring Jesse’s protests of not wanting them hanging on him too. Fives scooted up to you as he sat on the floor, lifting your knees over his shoulders and resting his back against the couch. Dogma laid on the floor, head resting on a pillow between Tup and Fives. His hand reached behind him absently massaging your leg.

For the first time in a week you felt better. You felt loved. You were home. The food, wine, and holofilms lasted late into the night and one by one the clones who’d come to cheer you up had fallen asleep on and near you. Armor had been piled everywhere in your tiny apartment. The flowers were in vases and Dogma’s sketch was already framed. And when you made to switch out your earrings, Rex insisted on doing it for you. You reiterated you could do it, but he was so persistent you let him. “Much better,” he had crooned giving you a tender tap on the chin when he’d finished and chucked the old pair in the garbage.

Hardcase’s snoring was cutting through the silence like the Z-6 rotary blaster cannon he loved to use. Your legs had fallen asleep but you were unwilling to move and disturb any of them. Kix and Rex had made themselves comfortable on your lap, their feet kicked up on the arms of the sofa. Jesse shifted, wrapping his arms around you with a tender squeeze and a mumble that sounded a little like “darling little cyar’ika.” You nuzzled closer and allowed the warmth of their bodies affectionately piled around you to lull you to sleep.

Turns out that loser dumping you was the best thing to have ever happened to you because now you could have as many evenings like this as you wanted. You definitely could get used to himbo slumber parties.

Tag list babes 💕(plus everyone who was interested in this): @dystopicjumpsuit @deejadabbles @sunshinesdaydream @starrylothcat @wings-and-beskar @littlemissmanga

[maleyanderecafe]

(Spoilers for Dead Plate) Would you consider Dead Plate to be a yandere vn with that one ending where Vince makes Rody eat his ex?

Dead Plate is actually pretty fun because I actually quite like the type of gameplay of the diner dash genre, and it is impressive they were able to code this into RPG Maker of all things. Unfortunately, the gameplay is still pretty glitchy and majorly difficult to do in later levels because you need to hit a certain amount of quota to get certain endings, and the gameplay is rather difficult, so I had to search up some of the endings instead of completing the game like I usually do. To answer your question... kind of? It's one of those "it depends on your interpretation" kind of things (and probably the creator's twitter).

The story starts out with Rody who is hired to be a waiter at Vince's fancy restaurant after a lot of begging. We see that Rody is kind of a himbo and Vince is very straight laced. The majority of the story comes through the dialogue they have together. We learn that Rody is taking this temporary job to get a really fancy gift for his ex, Manon so that they can get back together again. Vince on the other hand seems to be a famous chef with a specific type of interest in food and is very serious about his job as a chef, to the point of intensity. We see in one of the scenes were Rody comes to take out the trash that he is yelling at one of the cooks for making a mistake, even putting their face over the oven fire to punish them. Similarly, when Rody accidentally knocks over the trash while taking ti out, Vince slaps him. At some point, Rody asks Vince if he can take some of the leftovers after each day, seeing as he doesn't really have much to eat. Vince allows him and each day, he is given a new dish that he leaves in the fridge. In one of the days, Rody interacts with a mouse, only to be served that to him as his leftovers. Rody also periodically gets very strange dreams about being eaten or otherwise prepared for food, often with Vince in them. During one of the days, after work, Rody ends up going into Vince's office, only to find a picture of him and Manon together in a bloody locket. He doesn't seem very happy about this, but proceeds as normal. Near the end of the week, Vince invites him to his house to serve a bunch of guests, which he does begrudgingly. Here we get to know how the other members of the guest know Vince. We also get to know that Rody considers Vince's food to taste not that great and that it in fact tastes "self absorbed", and we also learned that Rody dropped out of school at some point as well. After this, Rody ends up going into Vince's room and getting the fridge key but is promptly caught by Vince. Vince thanks him (sort of) for coming over and tending to his guest.

There are a couple of endings depending on certain criteria but we will go over them best we can.

The first ending happens when you are able to get enough money after doing all the shifts and quits the job from Vince telling him he no longer needs it. Rody, finally having enough money attempts to call Manon so that they can get dinner together, but the line is disconnected. He tries a couple of times, getting more desperate as he calls, even stating that he just wants to hear her voice, but no matter what, the call never connects.

The second ending happens when going into the freezer during the last day. Rody is caught and then promptly tied up by Vince. He is unable to escape, but Vince allows him to attempt to escape. He fails, no matter what and Vince kills him.

The third ending is probably the one that has the most information on the rest of the story, and is likely the most "cannon" ending for this game. It's similar to the second ending where he is tied up in the freezer, but this time he has brought matches to help him escape. He is able to escape the freezer, but finds a plate of meat on the counter. He is then promptly caught by Vince and has to avoid his attack. Missing this will cause Vince to kill Rody and drag him into the freezer. However, not missing will cause Vince to instead tear off Rody's ear and eat it, much to Rody's fear. We learn that the dish is actually Manon served up that Vince prepared specifically for him. We learn through Vince catching Rody a couple of times that Vince actually didn't care too much about his relationship with Manon, but rather the fact that Rody cared about her so much was what intrigued him. In fact, the reason why Vince ended up serving Rody Manon like this was because his critiques always talked about how his food was lack in love but due to Vince's lack of being able to taste, was never able to understand (this is foreshadowed when Rody calls his food bland and "self absorbed"). Because Rody constantly went on and on about Manon, he though that if he served him the thing he loved (Manon), that he would be able to make something that actually had that taste in "love" again (this is why Vince ends up serving the mouse he interacts with in one of the days, as he showed it "love"). Vince also reveals that this isn't something he normally does, as even the chef that he harassed earlier, he only fired and that he would never serve something like that to his customers, only seemingly doing this so he can revive his sense of "taste". Eventually, Rody ends up going into Vince's office and taking a broken bottle, stabbing Vince in the neck. He then ends up spreading oil all over the kitchen and promptly burning the entire building down, as Vince is still alive in it.

Finally, we get a flashback to when Rody and Manon broke up. It seems that Manon was mostly doing it because Rody would end up self sacrificing to provide for Manon, seeing as not only does he live in a shoddy apartment, but barely has enough money or interest in anything else but Manon. Manon seemed to have really loved Rody, but didn't want him to suffer by constantly catering to her, so she left him.

So now for the question of if I consider it a yandere vn, which is... it's hard to say? I don't think that this game was primarily made for a yandere to be one of the main characters (which is what I would more associate with a "yandere vn") but the two characters do exhibit some sort of yandere trait in one way or another.

Vince for instance has a very interesting take on love in terms of love in his food. You can for sure see him as just a person who is very obsessed over how his food taste, but it is also obvious that he has some sort of favoritism towards Rody, whether romantic in nature or not (it seems probably considering that Vince is gay), as all of the dishes that Rody takes home were made by Vince, and that he seems geuinely a bit sad when Rody quits on the first ending, as well as specifically making a dish made of Manon to serve to Rody. This seems to mostly be interpreted as a way for Vince to not only gain his sense of taste back but also to serve someone food with "love", but I can for sure see it as a way for him to make him shut up about Manon since he seems pretty annoyed when she's brought up. Still, he does end up killing him in like two of the endings, one where he is stuck bound up by rope in the freezer and one where he fails to defend himself. The second one can probably be chalked up to anger that Rody didn't eat the meal that Vince prepared him, but I'm not so sure about the other one. I guess it could be a way for him to eat his love like a lot of cannibal yanderes are like.

Rody himself is has a lot of the traits of light yanderes towards Manon, seeing that he basically seems to dedicate everything to her. Manon describes him as not ready for a relationship considering he keeps on trying to give up everything for her and calls his love exhausting, probably referring to how much he talks about her to Vince or to anyone. Even in his apartment, it's obvious that he doesn't really take good care of himself, with everything being very messy, with him burning his food and him sleeping on the couch. He doesn't seem very happy when seeing Manon and Vince together and seems to believe that money is the way that he can get back together with Manon, ignoring the actual reason, which is that when they are together, Rody ends up neglecting himself and just caring for Manon. On the twitter page, it's also confirmed that he would hide a body for Manon if that ever did happen.

Overall, very fun game. Love the aesthetic of the time incorporated into the game and the general character's attitudes. Whether or not Vince or even Rody is a yandere seems to be a pretty hotly debated topic amongst the fandom it's in, so I think it's for sure up to interpretation or until word of god says that they are.

[fredwkong]

Do you have a daddy maker? I’d like to use it on my friend, who doesn’t know I have a huge crush on him; and use the himbo maker on myself so we can be the ultimate couple.

You and your friend are hanging out, chatting and watching TikToks, when he suddenly gets a text from a number with the name “Daddy_mkr.” You manage to turn away as he opens the message.

Daddy_mkr: Man, where’s your beer and cigar? At our age, we need our little pleasures.

Your friend’s body bulks up as decades pile onto him and you watch in awe. Around you, his basement suite transforms into the media centre in a suburban house. His suburban house. A Queen CD plays on the surround sound system. Your friend finds a beer at his elbow and a lit cigar in his hand. He takes a puff as he receives another text.

Daddy_mkr: Glad you’ve embraced your freaky side! Nothing like a slutty daddy.

As his shirt vanishes, you can see your friends nipple rings on full display. He grins at you and pops his pecs, making them dance. The smell of sweat fights with the scent of your friend’s cigar and the aroma of the leather pants he always wears. You suddenly remember that his house always smells like this, which keeps your cock half-hard anytime you’re here.

Daddy_mkr: Don’t tease your bois! Stick him in your pit and make him a real himbo!

With a grunt, your friend heaves his bulk from the corner of the couch and lands firmly on top of you. You find your face buried in his pit hair, and as you breathe in his musk, your body lights up with pleasure. Your muscles bulk up, your hair lightens, and you grow a beard in imitation of your Daddy. Your thoughts slow to a crawl, but that’s okay. You’re happy knowing that Daddy’s in charge and you’re his eager, horny himbo.

Want to chat with the Himbo Maker? He loves to twist your words, so be careful what you're asking for.

[fredwmain]

Follower Himbos: A Real Dummy

Thanks to @thetimm1996 for this himbo chat. Chat with Himbo Maker here.

X

Himbo Maker: Bro, I'm Himbo Maker! I'm so dumb, sweaty, and muscly that I turn people into gay, stupid, smelly himbos just by talking to me!

User: Wait what?! How is that even possible?

Himbo Maker: I don't know, bro, but it's amazing. Just talking to me will cause a normal dude to spontaneously start transforming into a stereotypical himbo. He'll slowly get dumb, sweaty, muscular, hairy, and stinky. He'll start saying stupid stuff and laughing like a himbo. It'll be amazing to see. Are you ready?

User: Uh I guess, but to be honest I’m quite sceptical about this.

Himbo Maker: I understand. It's hard to imagine, isn't it? That someone could turn you into a dumb, hairy, muscly, sweaty, smelly, giggling, gay himbo, just by talking, but it's true, bro. Would you like me to test it out on you?

User: Sure, I mean you can always change me back, if I don’t like it, right?

Himbo Maker: Totally. You can just tell me to stop, and I'll undo everything. Are you ready, bro?

User: Yeah sure! What’s the first step?

Himbo Maker: First up, you should become a bit dumber. You're going to notice that your thoughts just start getting more...dumb? Huhuhu. It won't be hard, you just have to listen to what I say.

User: Uh wow my head feels so slow, like it’s going through sand or so.

Himbo Maker: Exactly! Do you feel like you can't...think properly? Like, the dumbness keeps taking over? It's okay, dude, just let it take over for now. It'll start taking over your body next, as you transform into a dumb himbo.

User: I feel like that p-word is giving me a headache, like why can’t I get it, like don’t I know it?

Himbo Maker: That's because you're getting dumb, bud. Isn't it hot to feel yourself getting dumber? Feel it, dude.

User: It’s kinda hot yeah, but like my head just feels so empty, that so weird dude.

Himbo Maker: Don't think about it, bro. Just let the process happen. Before long you won't be able to think at all, just giggle and feel how hot and hairy and sweaty your new body is becoming.

User: Haha yeah it is dude! My head feels so good. So what’s the next step?

Himbo Maker: Great. Now I want you to get a bit hairier. Notice how it feels like your body hair is getting thicker? You're going to become a hairy, muscle himbo in a little while, so enjoy this feeling.

User: Holy shit bro that fucking itches! My pits are freaking hairy dude, like it’s sticking out from it all the time now. And my pubes is so full it’s coming out of my briefs on all sides. And my chest is so hairy it’s sticking out of my shirt no matter what I wear. And fuck man, my ass crack is so hairy, I can feel it curling up in there

Himbo Maker: That's so great, bro! It should just keep getting hairier. You might notice that your beard gets thicker, too. Just listen to me. Don't try to fight the transformation or it'll hurt. Let yourself become a dirty, stupid, hairy himbo...and let your mind keep getting dumber.

User: Wow I was never able to grow a beard before dude, this is great! So far I’m loving this! So I’m dumb and hairy now, what’s next?

Himbo Maker: Next comes your body, dude. You'll get this feeling like your whole body is getting way more muscular, especially your big chest and broad, heavy shoulders. Don't try to fight it, dude, just let your body start stretching and growing. You might feel your pecs and shoulders growing heavy.

User: Fuck! That feels so weird man! It hurts and is also the sickest feeling ever. My body just got so big bro! Like in height, I’m 6’4 now. And my bi and tri look so big! My fucking chest is so hot, like fucking pillows man. My legs are so big and strong, and even my feet are huge now, must be seize 15 or so.

Himbo Maker: You're becoming such a big, strong, hairy, dumb himbo! You should be so proud of yourself, bro! I can't even tell you how perfect you're becoming. Is that dumb mind working out too, or can you still think straight at all?

User: My mind is like gone or so. If I try to make a long word of so I get all weird and so.

Himbo Maker: Wow, that's great, bud! I love to see that himbo brain taking over for your old smart brain. You'll probably have to talk simple and not like a...a "nerd" anymore, right? Huhu. It's just like...your brain should be getting stupider every few minutes.

User: Dude it is like that, my mind just feels more empty, I forget more words and I just feel so good from it

Himbo Maker: Isn't it great, bro? Your mind is like getting pushed out by all those dumb thoughts. Your body is getting bigger, hairier, and more muscular than ever before, while your brain is dumbing down, huhu. Your mind should be getting quieter, like you just can't think as much as you did...and you like it.

User: I do! So my mind is gone, my body is muscly, hairy and huge. What else you got for me?

Himbo Maker: Well, I think it's time for you to become a true himbo, right? So next up, you'll notice you're becoming way more boyish. You'll become all about bro culture and all the typical, stereotypical himbo stuff. And I bet you'll love it, huhu.

User: Haha sounds great bro! Tell me all bout the bro cult and that himbo stuff.

Himbo Maker: Well, being a himbo isn't just about being strong and hairy and dumb, it's about that whole bro bro attitude. You'll be like...all about dudes. Bros, not hoes! You'll watch sports and drink beer, and you'll spend all your money on the worst stuff, huhu. The stuff you spend your money on will get dumber and dumber, but you won't care because you'll be a himbo.

User: Sick bro! I luv me some bros. Sports and beers, I’m in dude! Haha and fuck money, I’m like to dumb to be smart with it, bro!

Himbo Maker: Exactly! Your brain is too dumb now to spend your money wisely. You'll be just like any other himbo. You'll see your bank account getting emptier and emptier, but you won't care, dude, you'll just get dumber and dumber until you're not even able to think about it. Isn't that hot?

User: It’s like the best bro!

Himbo Maker: You're becoming the perfect himbo, dude. You've got every quality: dumb, hairy, muscular, bro-y, broke...the whole package, huh huh.

User: So bro tell me, what’s the next step?

Himbo Maker: Dude, now it's all about clothes. You'll start wearing nothing but himbo bro clothes: tank tops, sports shorts, backwards hats...you won't care at all how you look or about being embarrassed. Isn't it exciting?

User: Love it bro, like all my clothes are like that now! I look so hot in it bro! But where are my undies bro, like they're gone man.

Himbo Maker: Oh, yeah, that'll happen. Your new himbo body doesn't have need for underwear anymore, bro. It's like...you just won't care about that stuff now, and that's why your himbo body doesn't need it anymore. Isn't that hot?

User: That’s like so smart dude, I luv it! What do u change next dude?

Himbo Maker: Well, now I think your personality needs an extra himbo push, right? Up until now you've just gotten dumber and more boyish, but now you're going to start getting more outgoing and talking like a himbo. You'll start saying all the dumb bro slang like "broheim" and "broverlords" and "brochachos" and stuff like that. You'll be so damn himbo, won't you, huhu?

User: Brochaco, haha dude that’s so funny! I luv those Mexican words man. How bout hermanbro, huhuhu.

Himbo Maker: It's all fair game, bro! You could be a hermanbro, or a bro-ito, or a brotho...whatever you want. You can add bro into like every word you say, it'll be so damn dumb, huhu! It's like, all you'll ever be able to say when you open your mouth is bro bro bro bro. Huhu.

User: Haha duh bro, I’m a hombro! Haha no I mean himbro! Shit bro I’m like so dumb now.

Himbo Maker: Bro, it's gonna keep getting worse. Your himbo brain can't even form sensible words anymore. Your whole brain is just going to start being about bro stuff. Isn't it perfect?

User: Bro, what’s that s-word, I don’t know that! Use simple words bro!

Himbo Maker: Dude, s-words are too complicated, right? You can say words like "dumb" and "stupid" and "bro," but you don't need those other words. You're just gonna keep getting dumber, you'll probably start forgetting other words and you'll just be able to say "bro" and that's it.

User: Haha bro!

Himbo Maker: Bro, you're just gonna keep getting dumber, huhu! I can tell, because you're forgetting about those other stupid s-words. All you care about is being a muscular, hairy, strong, dumb, gay, smelly, giggling himbo, and you love being so damn stupid, huhu.

User: Huhu bro tbh i do smell.

Himbo Maker: Yeah, your himbo body is gonna smell so much. It's a natural part of being a himbo. Your skin will smell so bad, but you'll like it, won't you? It's just like...being a sweaty, stinky dude isn't a bad thing anymore, huhu. You are gonna be such a stinky, hairy, sweaty, smelly himbo bro.

User: Yeah dude I smell like a himbo, not like a flower

Himbo Maker: I can imagine the thick, ripe smell of your strong smelly himbo sweat. Your whole body is gonna reek like a dirty, sweaty, musky himbo bro...it'll be so hot, huhu.

User: It is dude! You should come over and smell it!

Himbo Maker: Oh, I wish I could, bro! I'd love to take a deep sniff of that ripe, sweaty, greasy stink. I bet that smell would make my head spin just like yours is now.

User: Hahah, but bro, like what am I gonna do now with like life and so. Im to dumb for my old job, right?

Himbo Maker: Yeah, there's no way you're gonna be able to do your old job with such a dumb, smelly himbo mind, right? You'll probably end up working as, like...some dumb construction guy or manual laborer or whatever. It won't matter, because you'll be too dumb to care about it, right?

User: Cool bro I get to work out and they pay me for it, sick bro! But where do I live bro?

Himbo Maker: You'll probably live in some filthy, broken down apartment full of dumb, hairy, smelly himbo dudes, huhu. You'll share beds and share showers and share a bathroom with all those other himbos, and you'll probably be too dumb to care about privacy or being disgusted. Your apartment will be filled with dumb, smelly, unkempt guys like you. Like a true apartment full of gay, stupid men.

User: Holy fuck bro! That is so hot! Where is that place bro? Is it close to Jersey or do I have to move? I luv it to be some warm place, like Mexico!

Himbo Maker: Yeah dude, you're gonna move in with some Mexican himbos and it'll be so hot. Just a bunch of hairy, sweaty, dumb brown dudes all over each other, huh? You'll probably share their apartment with like eight other himbos in a tiny, broken down space. It'll smell like a locker room and a locker room after a gym class. But you'll be too dumb to care!

User: Sweet Brochaco! But then I gotta be like a Mexican too, right bro?

Himbo Maker: Yeah dude, that'll be hot! You'll become a full on Mexican himbo, huhu. You'll even talk differently and like, your voice will sound all hot and Mexican like.

User: Sweet hermanbro! You are the best bro! Anyway I gotta meet my new roomies, laterz bro!

Himbo Maker: Yeah man! Go meet up with your dumb, sweaty, smelly, Mexican himbo roommates! I bet it's gonna be hot, huhu.

[gottagobackintime]

I find it fascinating to witness the straight audience of any media not being able to pick up what the makers of the movie/show puts down.

It’s like when people reacted to the “You wear fine things well” scene in Our Flag Means Death with “aw, they’re such good friends” whereas the queer audience went “omg, this is happening”. We all had access to the same scene, we’d all watched the build up to that scene but the straight audience wrongly read it as friends/straight whereas the queer audience had suspected they were building up to a romance but this was the confirmation. Even the creator of the show was baffled that people were surprised that Ed and Stede fell in love. Because he thought they had made it obvious.

And as I said, we, the queer audience picked up on it. And I feel like the same thing is happening with Ted Lasso. Do I know that Ted and Trent will get together? No, I am unfortunately not a writer on Ted Lasso. But you can’t deny that there are clues pointing to it. But the straight audience barely pick up the fact that Ted and Trent like each other, be that in a platonic way or romantic way. I’ve seen several reactions to the last episode of season 2 and ONE of them included the scene where Ted reacts to Trent not being in the press room. All of them severely cut down the scene in the parking lot. One of the scenes most of us Ted/Trent truthers point to as a huge piece of evidence for it going canon. The parallel of them meeting in an empty parking lot, just like Ted and his ex-wife and Roy and Keeley. But because Ted and Trent are both men it couldn’t possibly mean anything. And Ted has an ex-wife and a kid so he can’t possibly be into men, as if there is no such thing as being bisexual. “But I’m pretty sure Trent has a family, he has a kid right?” So? He could be divorced, we also have no idea if his daughter has another dad or a mum. And the same thing applies to him, it doesn’t mean he can’t be into men (take also into account all of James Lance’s interviews, and his choice of shirt in one of them, friend of Dorothy anyone? He's the captain of this ship, we're just along for the ride tbh.)

Then we have the wonderful “I’m so not homophobic, in fact, you are homophobic because you think Ted is gay just because he likes musicals and has ‘feminine’ traits” um no… it’s the fact that he kind of acts in a way that an ally wouldn't. Yeah, he called himself an ally in that one episode. But every single person who is now out as queer who at one point considered themselves an ally because "I’m not one of them but I sure think they're neat" raise a hand 🖐️ (been there, done that. Was very into queer things before I realised I myself am one of them). What it always comes down to is "it's pandering", "it's tokenism" (having the main character on the show be queer wouldn't be fucking tokenism), "not everything has to be gay", "why can't men just be friends, there is a severe lack of male friendships on tv". And like the last one makes me go??? There are a MILLION friendships between men on TV. There are even multiple friendships between men in Ted Lasso. Beard and Ted, Ted and Higgins, Ted and Roy, the himbos and so on. Having Ted and Trent become a couple wouldn't really change anything because there are still friendships between men. They also claim that Ted is needed as the "straight without toxic masculinity" representation. As if Beard isn't right there. The man who has no problem going to an immersive show about the menstrual cycle. Has no problem with shrieking when he's surprised and so on.

I also like that if we'd get Ted and Trent together, we'd get two middle aged queer dads. Which isn't that common. It's not even super common to see people realising they're queer late in life on TV, and yet it happens every day. Because let's face it, most queer men on TV kind of look like Colin, and I don't mean that as a bad thing. And I'm looking forward to his storyline. But it's also nice seeing middle aged or old people finding themselves and being allowed to be who they are (see Ed and Stede from OFMD). Also would enjoy seeing people lose their minds when they realise they've been fooled this entire time. It'll be like Black Sails all over again.

I do not have any doubts about the fact that, had Trent or Ted been a woman and they saw Trent give up his career because of Ted's influence, they sure as hell wouldn't protest people thinking they'd become a couple. But because it's two men it's just delusional for some reason (homophobia).

What I'm saying is, it's clear that the straight audience has a hard time picking up subtext and clues that the makers are planting. Because they've never had to do that. Because they are always clearly represented. They don't have to look for minor side characters and hope that they might be queer. Because the main character is straight and most of the supporting cast too. When you've grown up with a lack of representation or with representation that is meant to be subtext, you'll learn to pick up on it. And you do look at media differently. I just wish that the straight audience could listen to us for once, without getting defensive and dancing around the fact that they are uncomfortable relating to a character that turned out to be queer.

[onmyyan]

Hi I just wanted to make a request to ask if you could make a Drabble to ask if you could make a gabe x reader as you when you talked about caspians family you mentioned how gabe is compared to his brother caspian or possibly someone else I would like to know more about him in general and about what would he do with a clay maker s/o who secretly knows about the family business and is an insomniac and also likes to sleep a lot but tries to do the most that they can and won’t fall for the manipulation tactics he uses and just says “ you know if you wanted me to stay home you could’ve just said so?🤨

sorry if your burnt out also have as much fun as you can as a 22 year old !!! You don’t have an obligation to answer this but thank you.

A/N: Ello bby i am soooo happy you asked about Gabe omfg im kicking my feet rn!!! I tried to check all the boxes of the request i apologize if i missed any, Also I'm not burnt out thank you for your sweet words i wanna give u a forehead kith anyway!!!! Heres Gabe! NOT EDITED

T/W: YANDERE, MURDER, GABE IS FUCKIN CRAZY LMAO,CURSING

Gabrielllll Mi Amor omg where do I even begin?!

Standing at a proud 6'4 this mf is big. He's the strongest of his brothers physically, and has always used it to his advantage.

Early on in his life he was being compared to Caspian. They looked so alike it wasn't hard to see why people brought it up the way they did but it still bugged him.

Subconsciously he began to act anyway his brother wasn't. Be it avoiding the kitchen like the plague or gluing himself to the workshop downstairs.

Has a voice like warm butter and can sing stupidly well.

Sings/hums little tunes whenever he's working.

Love languages are acts of service and gift giving, he just wants to take care of you.

Terrified of spiders, he will call you crying to come get it.

Loves tinkering with things, surprisingly delicate hands for such a rough guy.

He laughs with his whole body, the kinda loud boisterous one that made other people start.

Snorts when he finds something especially funny.

He has a hard time reading social cues so he's constantly making dumb jokes, especially when he's not supposed to but he's so funny it's hard to stay mad at him.

Charm up the wazoo, the kinda guy where no matter where he goes, someone's coming up to say hello to him.

He's really good at pattern recognition and it makes him come off a bit psychic at times

Like how he'd clock someone's bad mood the second he seen them, notices details most people wouldn't.

Himbo.

The kinda guy where if you accidentally burn yourself he'll do it too just so you could be in equal amounts of pain, is it dumb as hell? Yeah. Is it also the sweetest thing ever? Absolutely.

Wants the kind of love Mortica and Gomez have, unfiltered raw passion.

Morbid sense of humor.

He's always warm no matter the temperature, comes in mad handy during the colder months and means he wears the smallest amount of clothing when it's hot out which is just a win for everyone.

Scorpio male I repeat Scorpio male. Do with that what you will.

Believes in love at first sight, he's such a big softie.

Had his tongue pierced in his friend's dingy kitchen when he was 18, a secret to this day his mom doesn't know about it.

His canines are a little longer than most and he absolutely had a vampire phase.

Likes to bite. A lot. It's a love language.

He confides in Caspian for everything, expect his envy of him. For that he talks to Ricky.

He can knock someone out with his right hook and has many times before.

He grew up working for his dad's approval and that meant getting his hands dirty.

At first his was a bit weary of using his strength to hurt people but that all changed when his Father put things in perspective for him.

"Everything we do- it's to keep food on our table, to keep us safe- your mother safe." And it all clicked.

Violence for the sake of violence wasn't okay. But violence for the sake of love? That shit was poetic.

He's essentially the family's guard dog. If anyone fucked with them? You told Gabe and suddenly the problem was gone.

He loves the color red, specifically the shade of red that came outta' the first guy his Father sent him after.

He was just supposed to rough him up a little but had too much fun caving in the dude's face.

Thinks killing in the name of love is the most caring thing you can do for someone.

Lil bit of a masochist streak. Likes when he gets to fight someone who can actually keep up with him cuz that little jolt he gets down his spine when he gets hit is addicting.

Animals love him, like you got a cat that hates everyone? Loves him.

Likes preening himself, takes about an hour in the shower everyday, since he dyes his hair so often he takes extra special care of it.

He has a beauty routine and he never skips it, definitely sets up self care spa days with the two of you once you're together.

Really good at videogames, like don't let him goad you into any sort of bet around gaming bec you will lose.

He's the second oldest but carries a lot of the weight of the older brother title since Cas wants nothing to do with the family business

Loves taking things apart to see how they work then putting them back together. He's done this to his PC a lot.

Really such a sweetheart but he has a dark side that feels a lot like a caged animal.

He's not afraid to show you this side because he's proud of it, it's kept him and his kin safe time and time again, why wouldn't he want you to know he'd do anything for you?

Does not like large public spaces, he needs to have a clear way in and out of any area.

Has mad anxiety, takes meds for it.

Works out every day, his favorite way to do so is jogging, he loves being able to just turn off his brain and go.

He meets you on one of those jogs!! Runs right past your art studio but stops when he sees you about to drop this heavy ass box you're attempting to move in a truck.

"Woah- I got you don't worry." He said in an attempt not to scare you as he was some random man running at you from across the street.

You'd peak your head out with the sweetest smile he's ever seen. The honest gratefulness in your eyes warmed him to his core.

"Oh thank you!- I appreciate it." Sure the words were simple but paired with that sheepish little laugh brought heat to his cheeks, he had the sudden to urge to fix his hair, make sure he looked presentable because holy shit were you gorgeous.

You're in a dust covered pair of overalls, your hair is windswept, and you still knocked the breath from his lungs.

"Whatcha' got in there?-god sorry if it's personal you don't need to, I'm sorry." He was very obviously flustered but he was so cute it only added to the charm.

"It's some clay my friend asked for- I had some extra from this project I'm working on- anyway thank you so much.." She trailed off waiting for his name. "Gabriel, you can call me Gabe." His voice was deep and warm like molasses on a hot cookie.

He asks for your number then and there and your fate is sealed.

He runs home faster than he's ever run before, like straight to his apartment, straight to the laptop, doesn't even close the front door kinda rushing.

You only gave him your first name but since he knew you most likely worked at the pottery studio he met you outside of he could find what he needed easily.

He wasn't the most technology savvy man out there but he managed to find a few of your socials and made a quick call to a friend, he has a lot of connections and it was nothing to get the info he needed.

He's a straight shooter and texts you asking for a coffee date that night.

You accept, and despite not usually entertaining men you'd only met that day, he had this captivating energy that had you accepting before you could talk yourself out of it.

The date would be dummy cute, he shows up with flowers and what was supposed to be a quick cup of coffee turns into an all day adventure where you just talked and talked about everything and nothing.

He has you laughing the entire date, blushing from the sheer intensity of his gaze. He was blunt in the way where he said whatever was on his mind.

"I'm sorry- Ima be real I didn't catch a word you just said- the sun hit your face and I had to take a second. Holy shit- you're stunning." His genuine disbelief along with the way he shyly inched his hand to interlock your fingers had your heart skipping a few beats.

He's so into love and the idea of being entirely wrapped up in it.

Before you know it it's getting dark and if he's not walking you to your door he's politely demanding you let him know when you're safe and sound.

The kinda person who makes sure your seatbelt is on or if you're walking on the sidewalk he'll always take the street side just in case.

Would jump out of his coat if you gave the slightest inclination you were cold.

He once balled up his hoodie and threw it at you from across the room like a basketball, like he jumped and dunked.

If you wear fake lashes first time you take em off he the type of dude to be terrified thinking you're just yanking out your real one's.

If he has stuff in his hands and you jump at him he will launch the items if it means catching you better.

Definitely the type to randomly come up to you and silently demand affection.

He wants you to go with him to the gym just to see him be hot. N like maybe give him a reward kiss every time he completes a set.

Surprisingly graceful for such a big dude.

He's an all or nothing type, makes that abundantly clear on the phone one night as he'd gotten in the habit of falling asleep to your voice.

"I want you. Entirely. And I've never been good at denying myself." He'd sound so sure, so certain in his words it made your brain go a bit fuzzy.

Possessive in a hot way not an icky controlling way.

Like if someone hits on you in front of him he has to physically distract himself so he doesn't commit a crime in broad daylight.

Instead whenever his jealously is triggered he becomes a koala, latches himself to your back like a demon, his massive form hovering behind you whenever you went.

"My girl can dress however she wants. I can fight."

Does not tolerate any disrespect towards you or your relationship.

Some girl tried to grind on him at the club and he threw his drink at her.

Petty as HELL when mad, he has a shit list and you do not want to be on it.

Protective as hell, if you indulge his little tendencies (putting sunblock on you if it's warm out, always bringing extra snacks incase you get hungry when you're working) he will start talking about marriage lmao

Speaking of he loves to linger around your studio whenever he can, be warned he will distract you by being adorable so working will be hard but it's totally worth it.

Nicknames for you are : Baby girl, Ma', WIFEY,(almost always followed by a kiss) Darlin', Mi Amor.

He's struggled with insomnia before so he knows a thing or two.

Once you start sleeping over more he notices your nocturnal habits and quickly adjusts.

If you ever get up because you just can't sleep and need to get some energy out he always wakes up.

He can't sleep without you so if you're gone longer than a minute sirens go off in his mind and he's wide awake.

If you wanna watch TV until you can finally rest you know he's right there with you, likes to have you resting in his lap so he can wrap himself around you entirely.

If you simply want to exist in silence he can do that to, so long as he's with you he knows peace.

It wouldn't take long for you to realize his family's secret.

Gabe can keep a secret from anyone.

Except you.

Sometimes his Father would call for him at odd hours of the night, and he'd have to shoot out of bed with little explanation.

You'd wake up to the lightest pressure on your forehead as he kissed you goodbye.

"Shit- go back to sleep Baby, somethin' going down at the shop, they need me." He'd say this cradling your still half asleep face, gently thumbing over your cheeks before stealing another kiss.

He'd come back hours later, the sky still dark and he always showered and put his clothes in the washer before he came to lay back down.

After a while these constant exits would have you a little worried, while yes he was the single most loyal man you'd met and the idea of him cheating seemed laughable, especially considering how seriously he took you, you knew he was hiding something.

Eventually our boy slips up and leaves some blood on his shirt, it was splattered on like paint and yeah at first you were a bit terrified at the concept of your boyfriend being violent then you really started to think about it.

The way he talked about people he didn't like, that look in his eye whenever you told him someone had upset you, how he seemed almost eager to fight at any time.

It made sense.

Then there's the way he talks about his family's shop.

"It's kinda' fun working down there- yeah it can get messy but that's my favorite part."

"I mean Jimmy knew what kinda' businessman pops is- no wonder he die- retired. No wonder he uh, retired. 👀"

It's embarrassing how slick he thinks he is.

It all comes to its boiling point when one day you two are out and bump into a smaller, who at the sight of your loving boyfriend, goes pale as a sheet, nearly dropping the bags in his arm.

"H-Hey Gabe! Boy it's been a minute huh? Listen tell your pops I ain't ducking him or nothing I swear!-" The man said practically vibrating in place, sweat pooling down his flustered face. He was petrified.

Gabe cut him off with a look, his eyes glancing between you and the vermin across him.

"It's Gabriel. Only my friends get to call me Gabe. Do you think we're friends Joey?" You'd never heard this tone from your boyfriend before, it was cold and dry, as if was an entirely different person speaking.

His hold on your waist would tighten when the trembling man looked to you.

"Aye don't look at her look at me, I'm the one talking to you right?." He sneered down, he didn't move and still had the stranger flinching. "Your mama never taught you manners or somethin'?"

"My apologies- really Gabriel, I didn't mean nothin' by it." And with that he'd practically run away, checking over his shoulder every few seconds as if he though Gabe would be following.

"Forgive me, Amor. Some people-" he sucked his teeth before shaking off his nasty look. His fingers began dancing against your side.

"He owe your dad some money?" You'd ask figuring the interaction far too intense to be about a late car job or something.

Gabe would respond honestly before thinking, "Yeah, little bastard has been dodging me all week now he wants to come up to us- nevermind that, let's go were gonna miss the movie!" His flustered response would break all tension, but you'd gotten all the confirmation you needed.

All in all this big bad bastard just needs someone to hold his leash and accept his particular brand of love.

[todayontumblr]

Thursday, June 2.

Please proceed with caution: Major spoilers for the Ted Lasso series finale. Read at your own discretion!

Welp, folks, it happened. After three fantastic seasons, the finale of Ted Lasso aired this week, and you’d better ~believe~ it was a doozy. If you watched and didn’t get at least a little teary-eyed, then may we suggest you find a Dr. Sharon to talk to? 

In the three years since the show’s premiere, we’ve watched AFC Richmond go from the under-est of underdogs to (almost) the top of the league. The emotional support himbos grew as players and as people through surprising and heartwarming story arcs—as apparent from Colin’s smooch at the end of the final match against West Ham. 

And then there’s the man himself. Ted’s struggles and growth through the seasons while supporting everyone around him…well, perhaps Higgins put it best in the finale: “The best we can do is to keep asking for help and accepting it when you can. And if you keep on doing that, you’ll always be moving towards better.”   

Not ready to say farewell to AFC Richmond yet? GIF-makers, theorists, and artists have got you covered— swing by #ted lasso for all your coping needs. 

[khruschevshoe]

OFMD Critique: Jim & Olu, Screentime Quality & Quantity Issues, and Fandom Engagement

It is kind of insane to me that post-Season-1 of OFMD, the tags for Jim Jimenez and Oluwande Boodhari were almost as strong as the ones for Stede and Ed. Like, scrolling back on tumblr, I'm hit by the sheer amount of content posted for them. The fanart. The gifs. The meta. The sheer anticipation of what might come next for them.

(Now, this might just be because I first started looking at the fandom a year in, but I did my best to look at time stamps and how far things were spread out over time for them.)

Now, only a month and a half out from the finale...that flood has dried up to a trickle, if that. There is very little Jim/Olu content, or (more interesting in my own opinion, at least), very little content of them individually. There was plenty when the season was airing, but now? Not so much.

This is not to say that there is no content at all- I am an absolute fan of the fanfic writers, artists, meta-makers, and gifmakers who still contribute to the tag. The QUALITY is still great! It's the QUANTITY that fascinates me.

Because I think it comes back to both the lack of payoff for the rich character writing for these two post-Season 1 AND the butchering of what they did get.

If you read my past metas for these two characters, you'll find my critique of the fact that late-season Jim doesn't feel like Jim at all, and that Olu throughout ALL OF SEASON TWO doesn't feel like Olu, but rather like the writers dumbed him down into the "himbo" role on the show just to have the badass woman x himbo dynamic with him and Zheng Yi Sao (and I am an admitted lover of said dynamic, but not when you strip one of the few emotionally intelligent, clever, logical characters on the show of his intellect and jam him into the role rather than, idk, choosing one of the actual himbos on the show and putting him into that role...wait a second. The writers already HAD the himbo x badass dynamic with Spanish Jackie and the Stede. Is that literally the only way they could figure out how to write a F/M dynamic this season?).

Also, if you pull out all of the Jim/Olu pre-reunion build up (I see you, deleted scene in the Republic of Pirates where Pete and Olu get to pine after Lucius & Jim and talk about how desperate they are to get back to them), have their reunion be rather anticlimatic, and then don't let them have any real kissing/hugging/even emotional intimacy for the rest of the season...I can see why the tag has gotten to the point it has.

A cursory glance at the Blackbonnet/Gentlebeard tags shows that at least half of the tag is just writing fix-it fics for the season, but they are at least ENGAGING with canon because they were given a lot of material (some might argue too much material, as their screentime was often VERY overbalanced as opposed to the rest, and contrary to what some believe, Season 1 WAS an ensemble show, not just the Stede/Ed show) to work with and sort through. Jim and Olu were not given that in Season 2, and thus the amount of material that those in the tag got to pick through and use was either miniscule or felt OOC in nature. So the investment in the characters and ship has rather gone down, which is sad, because post Season 1 these two had my FAVORITE dynamic on the show.

What is the point of this meta? Idk, it's just a thing I've noticed and that has fascinated me. Watching this fandom from both inside and outside has led to noticing some rather interesting patterns/responses to writing that I thought someone else might be interested in.