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If you missed missa's stream, here's a quick summary made by chayanne :)👍
>> contexto en español e inglés en alt
>> context in spanish and english on alt (I tried my best with the english ones)
#qsmp#qsmp fanart#qsmp missa#qsmp philza#qsmp eggs#deathduo#death duo#why is life so unfair with deathduo fans#at least chay got to hang out with his papa :')#i missed missa so much#his chaotic and wet cat energy mean everything to me
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Hi! I love everything that you write and heh I am a fan! 😄 tbh this is my first time requesting something on Tumblr! If you don't mind and if I am not being a bother...can you write about how the guys would react If MC suddenly starts making meme references? I don't know how I got the idea but I am REALLY curious. And love you! :D
Hiya! Tyvm for the kind words, and apologies that this took a while! I hope you have the chance to enjoy it regardless ❤️❤️❤️ Love you too, sweet pea! I promise to get to the next request you’ve sent ASAP~
Aight but this would be hilarious because the range of the reactions is just ungodly. I will be putting this under a cut after Napoleon so I don’t clog up everyone’s dash, but all the suitors are included below otherwise!
Comte is the one that recognizes a few, but didn’t really stay in modern times long enough to be as well-versed as a Gen Z kid might. Regardless he finds the wittiness and absolute chaotic fuckery to be delightful, and will 100% support the harmless nonsense. It never fails to get a laugh out of him
Mozart that first day be like: “Buzz off MC I hate you” MC, because she likes swinging bats at wasps’ nests: “Well that’s not very cash money of you” Mozart: ?????????? Comte, giggling in the bg like the secret fae he is This one’s just because I’m petty, but after the events of Comte rt I just imagine them encountering Vlad again and MC’s just “I lived bitch.” while Comte is flipping him off behind her lkjahgkjhdsg
Comte @ Leo when he finds the latter under his desk: Had it not been for the laws of this land, I would have slaughtered you. MC: wheezing from the hallway as she’s about to give him his letters
MC: So how was your day, honey? Comte: Good, good--briefly had to go beastmode upon the punk that pilfered my lint roller MC, biting her lip to keep from laughing: So does Leo still have his kneecaps? Comte: for now.
Comte, @ literally anyone upsetting the MC: I won’t hesitate, bitch
Comte: Be careful with my emotional baggage, it’s designer
MC: What if I was evil and ran towards you at very fast speeds Comte: My arms are strong, I would catch and hug you
Leo and Dazai are the ones that don’t have a single reference point but are filled with so much dumbass chaos energy that they just. Understand immediately???? Nobody knows how or why, but they just catch on so fast--adapt the language in a matter of weeks. Never underestimate the power of combined boredom, depression, and humor
I swear to god I just see MC taking them their Blanc/Rouge and being like “here you go sir, one enslaved moisture” and they just go fucking hog wild from day one. MC starts impersonating Theo when he leaves the room around Dazai, like fake deep voice “you all only hate me because you do not like me and I am mean to you. grow up.” Or like the MC meets a baby on her travels with Leo around town and she holds them and says v seriously and sagely “So you are Baby? I have heard tales of your exploits.” and Leo about loses his shit right there. They both think MC is the funniest person alive--they’ve never been more eager to throw a ring at someone in their entire life.
Also a bonus for my beloved Dazai: MC, facing even the slightest inconvenience (like dropping her fork) in the most dramtic voice possible: Life is not daijoubu. Dazai: wheezing
MC, after watching Theo turn down a woman at the bar in the meanest way possible: bro quit letting the darkness consume you u r scaring the hoes Dazai, literally rolling around on the ground, half-drunk and dying:
MC, walking alongside Dazai and stopping to stare at her reflection in the River Seine. Dazai’s expecting some sad or twisted shit, since people often feel comfortable talking about those things around him, but instead she just: “Oh, it’s you. The source of all my problems.” And he about falls into the river from shock HAHAHA
At this point don’t be surprised if his next book is about an absolute madlad woman similar to MC
Napoleon finds it to be a delightful quirk more than anything? He doesn’t really understand it, but he finds it funny when they change their voice for effect or speak in exaggerated tones. If it’s just comprehensible enough for an outsider to understand--or Sebas gives him context--chances are it’ll send him into a laughing fit
For this one I just imagine MC singing that Ratatouille meme song obnoxiously bad while cooking, and Napoleon and Comte are just so wildly amused by it bc it makes zero sense and it’s only vaguely French at this point
MC @ Napoleon while they’re cooking brunch: Can I offer you a nice egg in these trying times?
MC, conflicted because she’s tired and wanted to sleep in but also got to see Napo’s cute sleeping face for a few hours: For my next stunt, I’ll wake up at 5AM on the day I can sleep in. Sebas: Early to bed and early to rise makes a person healthy, wealthy, and wise MC: early to bed and early to rise makes me a massive bitch Napoleon: laughing in agreement
Isaac is the type to be bewildered and concerned at first (especially when he hears the more nihilistic ones hoOOOoooOO BOY) but eventually begins to understand it’s some bizarre attempt at humor (that hurts Zack baby). While some part of him laments that it reminds him of Dazai and he’s secretly jealous of how she and Dazai bond over it, he will sometimes join in the chaos when the mood strikes him and he’s feeling mischievous
Isaac: How are you feeling? MC: Oh, I’m not Isaac: seconds from dialing 911 Isaac: Are you okay? MC: Oh yeah dw I just suffer from that syndrome where your neutral expression makes you look like you’re an angry serial killer Isaac: say sike rn
Isaac, tutoring MC and correcting something: MC, muttering while redoing it: The risk I took was calculated, but man am I bad at math. Isaac: unable to help a laugh
One time MC was avoiding Isaac for fear of hurting his feelings and he just confronts her like: Isaac: back by unpopular demand, me! What’s wrong, MC pls MC was so hecking proud of him
Isaac, telling MC about a recent discovery he learned at uni from another professor: bones typically heal stronger after they’ve been broken--so long as they’re set properly, of course MC, looking him dead in the eyes: So what you’re saying is that I should break every bone in my body until I become superhumanly powerful? Isaac: please do not, no
Mozart and Jeanne are just. Totally lost. Why are you talking like that??? Why are you making “crab hands”???? They don’t understand. Maybe never will. They reach a point where they just kind of laugh and shake their heads, endeared by the oddity after they’re used to it and have determined it isn’t a threat/insult.
MC: It’s a cold and it’s a brooooken, Waluigi. Waaaaluigiiiii...waaaahluigi..... Mozart: surprised, then starts snickering and playing along on the piano
Arthur, asking MC very personal questions out loud because he is an idiot sometimes: Soooo MC, are you a top or a bottom? MC: I’m a threat. (If he asks a second time, the response will be “Wouldn’t you like to know, weatherboy.”) Jeanne, fighting a smile:
MC, about to punch an asshole: Your free trial of being alive has ended Jeanne, seconds from laughing for the first time in 100 years:
Also, because I genuinely can’t help myself. You know that knight meme like “Parry this you fucking casual.” I cannot stress enough that it is literally the personification of Jeanne’s entire character. I’m not even joking.
Arthur and Shakespeare are utterly fascinated by the rapid evolution of wordplay and the sheer hilarity. They will ask all about these so-called “memes” and ask for examples of them if MC can show them (either somehow accessing her phone or drawing them). MC draws Arthur the knife cat meme and he about a s c e n d s at the hilarity of it all, points and yells THEO IS HOLDING THE KNIFE. He is correct. They will be delighted and follow along eagerly, and--god forbid--will make their own based on late 19th century struggles.
Is this where Shakespeare got the idea for “What, you egg? stabs him” and “You are a saucy boy.”? I’m too scared to ask. Don’t even get me started on “The Fool jingled miserably across the floor.” That one is just too on the nose...
I can’t even imagine what would happen to Shakespeare if MC like translated vines and memes into Ye Olde English around him. Imagine she’s at one of those noble balls and hears rumors of these two guys living together and they’re so obviously gay and he says “And those gents w’re roommates.” And in the most false surprised tone ever MC just replies “oh mine own god, those gents w’re roommates.” Imagine having a wife that’s just as hilarious as you are and hits you with all the force of a bag of wet mice every time you speak in retaliation, he’s going into palpitations.
Every time Arthur does smth stupid MC just: “I Pretend I Do Not See It.”
Vincent is tickled pink by MC’s penchant for finding joy and/or amusement in nearly everything they do, and he smiles gently when he sees them muttering and laughing to themselves. He wants to be able to join them in what they love, but he has a harder time following along and understanding the darker humor sometimes. Mostly gets confused??? Please give him the easier ones to mimic and laugh when he tries--or just include him in your jokes MC. He’s babie your honor...
But he also. Will not. Stand any kind of self-deprecation or borderline verbal self-harm. He’s usually very easygoing and calm, but for whatever reason that stuff makes him go deathly quiet and upset.
MC, after something goes horribly wrong, hugging Vincent: Oh Vince, we really in it now Vincent: giggling a little despite his worries, relaxing
MC: Theo stop simping for Vincent that’s my job
MC, when Theo leaves the room and she gets Vincent all to herself: The evil is defeated.
MC: And this is where I would put my will to live...if I h a d one! Vincent: ;-; MC: oh shit, oh fuck, I was only kidding Vincent wait (MC was subsequently lectured and loved on for many hours)
Theo is conflicted because on the one hand, he loves to see you smiling and having fun. On the other, you’re clowning as hard as Dazai and Arthur and he can only handle so many monkeys in his circus. Most of the time he will roll his eyes and be the straight man of this comedy, but you might find him cracking a smile--or accidentally letting a chuckle slip past his lips now and again.
MC, after meeting Theo: I’m a nice person, but I’m about to start throwing rocks at people.
Theo, those first days: Oh? You’re approaching me? Instead of running away, you’re coming right to me? MC: I can’t beat the shit out of you without getting closer.
Theo: Every time I ask MC to explain “vibe check” to me she hits me with some kind of improvised weapon
MC, after the “incident” (you know the one): This year, I lost my dear lover Theo Theo, in the distance: QUIT TELLING EVERYONE I’M DEAD! MC: ;-; sometimes I can still hear his voice...
Sebastian is last because oh boy. OH BOYYYYY I LOVE HIM. Okay so the way I see this happening with Sebastian is just. So wild. Because at first he’s t r y i n g so hard to be the proper butler man. He does not meme. But then he starts to drift closer to what Niles from The Nanny was, where he’ll quip and joke in private or when the situation is just beyond the amount of absurdity he can handle without making a snarky comment. Everyone in the house can’t fathom how Sebas and MC got so close so fast, but there are points where they’re just “Are they even speaking English anymore???” It’s 11 times funnier than normal because Sebas almost never smiles or laughs when memeing, the deadpan quality of his playing along sends MC every time
Has ABSOLUTELY said “HEY. PANINI HEAD. ARE YOU EVEN LISTENING TO ME???” jokingly when MC made a mistake in the kitchen. They laugh about it for y e a r s
MC: I can’t date someone who keeps a lamb as a pet, that’s so weird Sebas, brushing Lotte in front of MC: MC: MC: Okay, I will make an exception because she looks very polite
MC and Sebas, fully aware of the fame some of the men will reach in modern times: We will watch your career with great interest. (I s2g that’s like half of Sebas’ rt right there I’m crying)
Sebas rt with Lotte be like that 500 dollar Mareep meme: “sometimes a family can be just a boy, his gf, and their 500 dollar two foot tall Lotte”
#ikevamp#ikemen vampire#ikevamp meme#ikevamp headcanons#ikevamp hcs#ikevamp napoleon#ikevamp mozart#ikevamp leo#ikevamp leonardo#ikevamp arthur#ikevamp vincent#ikevamp isaac#ikevamp theo#ikevamp jean#ikevamp jeanne#ikevamp dazai#ikevamp shakespeare#ikevamp comte#ikevamp saint germain#ikevamp sebastian#can you tell I had way too much fun with this aksjhfkhsj#i am a degenerate memer I saw this ask and straight up went It's My T i m e.#though i hope this was a fun response for you love! i did my very best <333#tyty for the ask~#rambles#not incorrect quotes#mild profanity
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Treats For You (M)
↳ PAIRING: yuzuru hanyu × reader
↳ PLOT: You tend to a nervous Yuzu the night before a skating competition.
↳ WORD COUNT: 9k | one shot | domestic au, smut
↳ WARNINGS ⚠️ pwp, dom/sub, feeding yuzu treats, pegging, some very wet oral (m giving), cum play, oh lord it gets graphic, fingering, crying, mommy kink, yuzu’s crazy back arch, rough sex, masochism, aftercare, some asthma talk
↳ CARO’S NOTE: inspired by this juicy gif. PS: since i usually post for other fandoms — if you’re unfamiliar with yuzu, visit this intro post.
Just two minutes after you switch off the light, he starts fidgeting.
Repeatedly, all while messing around with his pillow. Soon enough, the blanket you share becomes all disheveled.
You turn your head towards the window to check. All as usual. The blinds are perfectly drawn to shut out the moonlight. Meanwhile, the humidifier infuses the air in gentle ten-minute intervals. Not even the heater is bumbling tonight. Yuzuru keeps on rustling beside you, still. Some of his plushies fall off the bed, one after the other.
Of course he can’t sleep. It’s daunting, no precaution ever helps. The blanket couldn’t be any more crumpled up at this point.
„I’m so nervous,“ he finally sits up another minute later, causing the duvet to lift. A little sigh follows.
Eventually, you turn in the sheets yourself, now facing him. Or rather, what you can vaguely make out as his crouching silhouette.
„Hey,“ you mumble from your left side of the bed. „You watched all of the performances from last month.“ You pat Yuzu’s pillow, hoping he would sink down on it again. „At least twice. Or more.“
God knows for how many hours he stretched in front of the TV on his spongy blue yoga mat, reviewing mountains of footage with a furrowed brow worthy of a restaurant critic.
Every jump and every turn, analyzed over and over. Down to the millimeter. Even the costume got its fair share of scorn. Too wide there, this detail on the collar could be different, that part gets in the way while doing spins.
„It’s all— I don’t know what I’m lacking these days.“
The silhouette doesn’t look like it’s headed to lie down again for the time being. You reach toward your bedstand’s squiggly designer lamp. After fumbling about in the dark, you find the bulky switch at its bottom. On goes the light again. Perhaps a bit too bright, both of you squint hard.
„It’s not like you’re dropping to second place anytime soon.“
Given how you thought you could call it a day before Yuzu started to fidget, maybe your voice is not fully resonant yet. It still carries a little unspoken ‚…right?‘ with it.
As soon as you finish the sentence, you feel how he can pick up on it already. The humidifier dryly comments by puffing out a cloud of lavender steam.
„I don’t really know,“ Yuzu retorts twisting, going into a deep shrug. He is completely sunken now.
„Looks like a simple big hug won’t do, hm.“
Yuzuru ends up nodding. It’s more knowing than admitting. But you don’t like the sense of resignation that comes with it, at all. The problem goes a little deeper than just motivating him with the stats he ironically already knows, times better than you, even.
It’s been going on for the entire day. The last time he made such a grouchy face at his videos was around Christmas. Back then, he couldn’t quite get the jumps right at the start of his routine. But now? His scores are just fine. Not to mention the jumps.
„I didn’t think you were lacking,“ you say. „You just fell once during training.“
And that was because he was fooling around during a break, not in the serious exercises.
„Sorry for bothering you,“ he buries his face in the blanket, beginning to ruffle his hair all over the place. Frustrated Friday-evening-Yuzu always does that, but the energy doesn’t seem to go anywhere this time.
The murmur of his stomach isn’t hard to miss either. You lay your hand on Yuzu’s back.
„Is it because you didn’t eat?“
You wonder what he had for dinner.
Only more guilty stomach growling reaches you as a reply. Figures: He skipped it, and lunch, too. His breakfast was so frugal, you don’t even remember whether he had his milk or not.
Yuzu was already pacing around in the living room at that point. Recalling the tricky parts of the upcoming choreography, treading his feet into the carpet, humming the steady rhythm of his skating program.
„Maybe I’m turning into a snickers diva,“ a muffled little comment emerges from where his chaotic hair sticks out from the duvet. At this point, his face is all buried there.
„I mean. If you allow me to baby you…“
Three minutes later. You rub your eyes, shift from leg to leg. The kitchen floor is as cold as ever so you regret not putting on socks. Meanwhile, there’s no problem raiding the fridge.
You could go to the grocery store five times a day and buy everything Yuzu’s mouth waters over — it’d still be stacked to the top. Snacks, veggies, particular sports drinks in weird blue colors, Japanese pickled plums, gyoza left-overs, salad, various fizzy drinks, mostly lemonade.
It’s like that with any food. Out of sight, out of mind. He won’t bother getting up from the yoga mat if he’s fixated on the TV.
After making two distinct picks and checking whether the fridge door closes properly, then bustling at the sink with a towel, you trot back to the bedroom. Equipped. In the meantime, Yuzu has recollected his plushies from the floor, gently aligning them next to his pillow.
They’re all in their strictly defined place again. You enter just the second after he’s arranged them in the usual half-circle order, centered around his favorite, all-time friendly-eyed Winnie Pooh bear.
„Will you look at that,“ you plant your little kitchen conquests onto the bed, rousing approval noises from Yuzuru who sparkles right at the box and plate you brought along. The grouchy face dissolves, curiosity takes its place. His food reactions will always be the cutest to you.
„Strawberries!“
„From the market. Wasn’t too expensive.“
Freshly doused in the sink, plump and very ripe.
„And rice cakes!“
Truth be told, there couldn’t be a bigger comfort food on his list and you shamelessly exploit the very fact.
„Every competition has a victory meal. Here, fruits first.“
After plopping down on the mattress yourself, you pick up one, then two strawberries. Immediately, Yuzu’s little upturned mouth opens wide as if a tiger baby was yawning.
He chews more eagerly than you thought. If you pass him pretzel sticks while he reviews things on the TV, he barely eats one or two of them.
„I like these,“ he swallows, prying for the next fruit in your hand already. „Sweet!“
„Tastes best with cake,“ you rearrange your sitting position, making sure to park your cold feet next to Yuzuru’s very warm ones. His toes are readily brushing against yours, Yuzuru perhaps not even noticing they do. He’s too fixated on the little cakes. In all things he does— focus incarnate. He can’t help it.
„Yes, I wanna try!“
You rummage in the packaging you brought along, draw forth a first treat. A second one you set aside on the plate. Tiger baby opens his mouth even wider, in goes the first chunk of the rich delicacy. Lord have mercy on his stomach, it’s 11:15 PM. But what’s normal to him, anyways.
Ten more minutes pass. After the strawberry box is two thirds empty and three juicy rice cakes have embarked on their last journey, Yuzu looks a lot more content than before, even if his bedhead arguably makes him look like a mad scientist. Junior professor Yuzuru Hanyu, escapee from his genius lab that exploded in a blaze of smoke.
You take it as your task to brush the outlaw strands back into their place with your fingers after pulling out a wet wipe — those with the way too astringent citrus flavor— from your bedstand, cleaning your hands off the rice. It’s not like your hands aren’t sticky on the regular.
To your satisfaction, Yuzu looks like a swaying cat, nestled into his blanket. With no more stomach growling audible, gladly. You put the plate on the bedside table, lean forward to kiss his belly, and shoot him a fracture of an ambiguous gaze.
„So… Fancy getting even more stuffed?“
„Sure! Is it a surprise?“ Yuzu looks around, presumably searching for more food you brought along.
The pure soul.
„Well, we already had dessert.“
„Oh, right! But, what’s the food, then?“
A little pause follows. Yuzuru couldn’t look any more thrilled. You decide to go with it.
„You’re too innocent,“ you lower down your pants by an inch, thumbs demonstratively hooked into the hem. You raise your eyebrows into a question that he cannot miss. „If you want. You might wanna grab your spray first, though.“
Only the last part fully registers in Yuzuru’s expression that finally goes from curious to… sheepish. He caught on.
Asthma spray at 11:30 PM is a cue he’s gotten familiar with over the last four months. Not in a million years did he think he’d ever have to use it late at night. Whatever decision process is rattling through Yuzu’s brain right now, it’s a fast one, though.
„Ha— okay!“
„Alright, Yuzu.“
„Just once second!“
Food round number two, it is. You kick off your pants and underwear but make sure they don’t land any place where plushies are. Yuzu is already busy at the other end of the room, visibly at work with shaky hands, browsing the cupboard with meds next to the window.
Now that he’s double nervous, you curse your idea, but remind yourself of the last late-evening time Yuzu had his head between your legs. ‚I dunno, I was just concentrated‘ are the words that stuck with you after asking him how on earth he kept his breath for what felt like 45 seconds.
Whatever masochist devil has been driving him, it gave your boyfriend skills you never even knew were possible to have out of absolute nowhere. Not to mention how easily it distracted him from anything else in the world.
Maybe that focus is an effect easy to replicate, you think. Anything that can take his mind off the competition tomorrow is worth trying.
Carefully, you move over to the right side of the bed. Then, recline on Yuzu’s pillow — on his explicit wish two months ago, you meticulously keep that tradition — and feel surrounded by plushies already.
Back then, Yuzu insisted that he shouldn’t be the only one watching out for you when you’re having sex. And that the pillow just smells really good of your hair afterwards. So there you lay, feeling all kinds of horny. Given that Yuzu is already returning to the bed, swiping his hair off his forehead. Looking very refreshed, letting his breath play. Sexy.
And there it goes already. The I dunno, I was just concentrated gaze. You arrange your legs wide enough for Yuzu to settle in the middle, him still sitting upright. His hands are still shaky when they reach around your outer thigh, but his eyes don’t lie to you in the very least.
„Your breath alright?“
A little nod, but he doesn’t heed the question for any longer. There’s gladly nothing that his lung doctor can’t figure out. You count on that, but asking doesn’t hurt.
Meanwhile, Yuzu’s eager eyes are already drawn downwards. Getting bigger and bigger. The surprise he had anticipated in fact now dances over his face, flighty and polite, but nonetheless apparent to you. He’s smiling, and it looks shy in the light of the bedstand lamp.
„I, ah…“
It’s as if he hasn’t seen you naked before, every time. For whatever reason, Yuzu always reverts to virgin mode with his first glance. You admit it’s flattering and amusing alike, but also — leaves you with Hitchcock level suspense.
Yuzuru has proven himself to be an expert in summoning a beginner’s zeal, an almost childlikeness. That keeps you on your toes and promises an intensity that routine and pragmatic energy management could never give you.
After letting his eyes linger a little more, his lips become visibly impatient. He’s already licking them. You’d promised food, and he takes it seriously. That Yuzu’s fingers stroke rather weirdly at your thighs does not escape your attention either. They’re practicing.
„Help yourself, touch.“
The stroking ceases. Yuzu doesn’t hesitate to reach down with his left. How he touches you sends a row of tingles down your legs. His fingertips are amazingly dainty and soft. He explores. Then, soon keeps on caressing about, leans his head forward, all still from his seated position. It doesn’t take too long until he goes straight to getting you off with his right hand.
„This is, wow,“ he mumbles to himself, already immersed in rubbing your clit. Going in circles, taking his time. Alternating between index and thumb.
„Yeah. That’s the spot,“ you shift in the pillow, eventually finding a good position to relax. You exhale, focus on his hand.
„So smooth,“ Yuzu traces his joining left hand up and down your labia.
„Maybe someone wants a taste?“
You were right that he would forget practically anything else. The yoga mat worry brow is blown off his face. Substituted by— appetite.
„Not just maybe, actually.“
Spreading your legs a little more is invitation enough to have Yuzuru lower his head onto your pubic bone, tongue already searching for its favorite place. Your fingers gently interlace in his hair as soon as he starts sucking. Keeping his bangs out of his eyes.
How unafraid to bury his face he is you soon get to witness. You can feel the bridge of his nose glide from lip to lip, and the feathery light brush of his lashes at the base of your inner thighs.
Yuzu’s tongue has always been cheeky, but today, it feels particularly adventurous and slippery. He can’t help but fumble about with his hands simultaneously. Beginner’s zeal, you knew it’d come.
The bucking of your hips comes too naturally to be controlled. Nor does Yuzuru know just how to hold his head back from thrusting. This little shit. Whatever is in those rice cakes, it made him a new level of keen. Soon enough, his tongue has riled you up plenty, and his focused eyes have become entirely monotone. Only preoccupied with one thing and one thing alone.
Just how much he dedicates his attention has to be a thing for the books. You feel like blowing up and moaning like crazy at this point, but manage to at least puff out. He knows you’re way too close. There’s a little smile you feel in the way he eats you.
„So that mouth gets a cum filling,“ you twist your fingers out of Yuzu’s wild hair. It’s all tangled again. The return of the mad professor. He has all the space in the world to bop his head as much as he wants now. One, two, three plushies fall over and tumble around the mattress. He doesn’t notice.
The warmth between your legs has been growing ceaselessly. Now, ready to brim. With Yuzu’s agile tongue slipping back and forth over your clit in erratic intervals, you feel like losing your mind with every lick. The way his lips excite you gives off the lewdest sucking noises. All wet, and resolute like a chess player not to drop you off that high.
He keeps his laps consistent, leans in more, and eventually— tips you off the edge with a fast sequence of letting his tongue dip under the hood of your clit. And letting it stay there, all until your legs start twitching. You groan out.
Yuzu gets a big. Fat. Cum filling indeed.
Your breath goes short, you grab his shoulders. Growling, cursing. Trying to ride the wave, but the contractions catch you harder than you thought. You can practically feel how much you ooze out and ruin his face.
Bratty he is, Yuzuru forms his mouth all kissy and pecks your clit through every throb. Until the shockwaves subside, letting your shaking thighs off the hook eventually.
Too fucking intense. The surge of pleasure keeps on making your mind hazy long after your orgasm is over. To add fuel to the fire, Yuzuru rubs his belly, as if he just had two happy meals for the price of one.
Pulling off, his face is all bright and slobbery in its remaining smile. His lips are cum-glazed, and more than just plain sweat trickles down his nose. Nothing better than a facial right in front of twenty plushies. Who knew Winnie the Pooh himself would ever be eye witness to Yuzu’s sporty head game.
Friendly bear he is, it doesn’t seem to bother him. From unsuspecting comfort teddy on Yuzu’s lap 23/7 to live-action porn audience. First row, no popcorn though, but HD sound quality and claims to free spit. The guy is living his absolute best life, isn’t he.
„You… growling. That was pretty hot,“ Yuzuru says. His jaw is hanging all loose and most of his speech is slurred. Yuzu looks all satiated. In your mind, you pat yourself on your own shoulder. Boyfriend corruption: almost complete.
„Like being spoiled? I want you to clean that up.“
Yuzu squeaks out giddy in reply. A moment later, he goes back to lean down again, swallowing and licking up cum from your drenched, swollen lips. His slurping noises are indulgent, wet, and desperately slutty. He succeeds in cleaning you up, but keeps on messing up himself even more. Yuzuru delights in rubbing his whole face into your dripping pussy until his eyebrows are sticky, his lids and cheeks are damp, and you feel capable to get up from the pillow.
Despite not being underneath the blanket, you notice that your feet aren’t that cold anymore.
He sits on the bed like a mermaid, huddled close to you. Normally, he would visibly sort his thoughts like that, but now, all he does is blink and nuzzle up against you with his forehead.
Settling, Yuzuru doesn’t seem to know where to put his hands and you take it as a chance to pepper them with kisses. The back of the hand, the palms, the wrists. It calms you, and it calms him.
You feel entirely drenched, refreshed and relaxed at once. How Yuzuru cuddles against your legs makes your heart warm, and the moment is blissful.
One lavender steam cloud later, you feel like moving again. Maybe there are two restless people in this relationship. The thought of it is funny.
„We could go on a little more,“ eventually, you pat his head. „With something different if you want.“
„Do you still have energy?“ he asks. His breath is somewhat slowing already. It feels hot against your leg.
„More than before, actually.“
He sits up. Looks like you surprised him again. Little does Yuzu know how much he shakes you up.
„Really?“
You nod, twirling at his bangs now.
„I have an idea. So… you remember what’s been waiting in a box for a month.“
You can tell he knows exactly what you mean. No doubt he didn’t take very long to recall it, either. That tells you something.
„Can we use it?“
That answer was fast.
„It’s what I’ve been thinking.“
„We’ve been putting this off but I’m still curious.“
And your guess was correct. It’s definitely been on his mind.
„Yeah, you’re right.“
Promptly, you direct your eyes to the bedroom cupboard to your far left. The one containing various kinds of skating blades in slender packagings, tracksuits in dark colors, fan presents, and mail orders. Among them, a larger jet black box—
That neither Yuzu nor you dared to open given it was a product of a reckless button click at 2 PM.
Admittedly, after Yuzu passed you a way too expensive bottle of sake that he got for his birthday. Since he’s allergic to alcohol, somebody thought she could give it a sure try instead. Pouring $200 into the sink would have been the better option.
Said black box soon sits between the two of you, wide open to reveal the truth of what sake can do.
„Oh man. What have I done.“
That button click comes back to bite you big time.
„This looks, I think, realistic—?“
At least on the surface.
Of course, you drunk fool had to order the ‚sculpted, real-life imitation‘ version. You couldn’t be any more embarrassed. No more alcohol in this flat, that’s for sure. What else to do but take it in stride now that the box is already open, though.
„I uh, think so. At least with the veins.“
„It’s… it is really big.“
At least three times Yuzu’s flaccid size if you don’t hallucinate right now.
„I don’t know how I’m not gonna tear you apart. How many inches are these, 12? My drunk self is too ambitious.“
Maybe you shouldn’t have used that word and said ‚reckless‘ instead. Because ambition surely and habitually triggers a prancing and posing Shia LaBeouf shouting ‚do it!‘ in Yuzuru’s athlete brain. You can see it in his eyes and already regret thinking out loud.
„We can still try.“
„If that’s a good idea or not we will probably see,“ you begin to inspect the contents one by one up close. „I think I bought a weapon.“
„Now I know why they call guns a strap,“ Yuzuru equally peaks over the edge of the box, looking like his future just flashed before his eyes.
„Next time I pass the sake to your coaches or something,“ you end up pulling out the red harness kit that glaringly lays on top of the contents. All looking very adjustable indeed. „That’s what my midnight fantasy seems to look like.“
„Uh—huh!“
Yuzu snakes his hand into the box himself now. Pulling out a transparent, orange-pink 13 oz bottle with a bubbly-looking fluid inside. Gaudy stuff, but a generous amount.
„Mister Lube. My new best friend,“ he says, laying the bottle aside and then pulling off his black PJ shirt. Although he strips quite leisurely, you can tell that Yuzuru is a little tense in his torso. That you will attend to in a minute, you think. But beforehand, you let your eyes roam for something else.
„They probably have something to clean it with in there as well. Let me see.“
You find that even if you might have ordered all this pretty tipsy, the toy set does have its quality. Just before you want to ask Yuzuru to warm up, he visibly ponders, then cleans his pajamas off the bed to make space for a little area.
„If you don’t mind, I stretch my muscles,“ Yuzuru puts aside a couple of plushies, too, but keeps Pooh close, assuming his typical pre-training stances.
He knows himself. That’s good.
„Tell me if you need help for the thigh stretching.“
In the meantime, you ease into the red kit and arrange the box contents on the bed. There seem to be fifteen things going on at once. If this would be public in the slightest, you believe the two of you must look like a bunch of eccentrics to anybody who’d watch you.
Ten minutes later, Yuzuru might just be in Olympic shape, has downed almost half a liter of spring water in one go. You know that he could probably deliver a quintuple jump on the spot if he wanted. The strap-on is all assembled, clean, and you have stored away the practically empty box of sake sinnery.
„I’ll skate cross-eyed and cross-legged tomorrow,“ Yuzu stares right at your crotch, face buried in his palms. Only his eyes peek through the fingers. „Godspeed to my ass.“
You sure as hell won’t disagree. This strap is a threat.
„I don’t know why I had to order supersize out of all possible things. You need a prayer circle after this. Where’s Mister Lube?“
„Here, over here,“ Yuzuru passes over the bottle, shaking it.
„I’ll relax you as good as I can, okay. Before I get arrested for possession of weapons without a license.“
And annihilating Yuzu’s insides with that XXL dick that he sure as hell doesn’t just want halfway in. Lord have mercy. You can only shake your head at yourself for buying this.
„Honestly though. Does it really fit in?“
Yuzu leans his face toward your hip, now on all fours, taking the sight in. He still can’t believe his eyes.
„We’ll see. Let your body decide, not your pride okay,“ you poke the tip of the strap-on into his left cheek. Hoping that it takes away some of the tension, at least. „And you can still tap the mattress.“
„Okay. Tap the mattress.“
He nods quite avidly. Same protocol as always. No spoken safewords, only something that Yuzu can make use of with his reflexes. Speech? Nothing you can both count on as soon as horniness kicks in.
You tried that for the first two weeks and quickly settled for tapping instead. Especially because Yuzu likes to have fingers in his mouth every so often.
„I mean. You just did like five splits, didn’t you. Warm-ups always help. If your ankle doesn’t fall off?“
That mini workout was more than just impressive, in fact. And still, you eye Yuzuru’s notoriously injured foot. The slim little fella has a long history of recovery behind him.
„The ankle is decent, the usual stuff.“
„I wish we had a smaller toy to start out with,“ you scratch your head. That might be the one thing that’s been missing from the box. „We still have Mister Lube, anyway. Watch this,“ you pick up the orange bottle, flipping the cap open. „It’s actually scented! Worth ruining the bed if you ask me.“
On goes the fluid, you rub it all across the length of the dildo. Must be cherry flavor or something. Yuzuru sure makes big eyes.
„I knew I could count on Mister Lube.“
„Yeah, we use lots. And I’ll be very gentle.“
The cherry scent is gladly much less tacky than the bottle itself, not too artificial-smelling either. You squeeze out a second load and distribute it over the strap-on just to be sure. Yuzuru’s breath goes faster.
„Can I ask something beforehand?“
„Go right ahead.“
„I wanna suck first if you…“
Who knew. The lube probably made his mouth water.
Being honest, you think that it might be a good idea to get this going. Better than blowing his pretty back out right away and making a mistake, even if he is much less tense now.
„I don’t mind, Yuzu. You already have some chapstick on, right? Here.“
You level your hips to line up with his mouth more easily. You can tell that Yuzuru, after some heavy blinking, eventually braces himself. There’s nothing more telling than his tunnel vision plastered all over his face. His eyes, lids heavy, are hypnotized and seem darker. Yuzu’s bedroom gaze is the best in the world.
„Okay, I’ll start.“
A first kittenish lick. A second. A third. Then, brave lips — enclosing the tip. He audibly nips and swallows.
A few more licks, and repeat. Mister Lube seems to taste pretty good. You bless the shady company that manufactures the black box of sin for once.
You let Yuzu explore, pump his hand around the shaft, lick from all directions he fancies. Compared to his wrist, the dildo doesn’t really fall short in diameter, but with Yuzu’s face up close you are relieved it’s not a complete David versus Goliath match.
Soon enough, he musters the courage to open his mouth a little wider, cramming a bit more in than just the tip. You can’t deny you’re getting turned on again with the way he slurps and hums around your dick. With the minutes, he becomes bolder, moving his head.
Even if the lube gathers at his chin and seeps down to the bed, he keeps on sucking, now with a first pearl of sweat lingering on his forehead already. You’d never think it’d make him break a sweat. To be fair, he just did fifty jumping jacks in the warm-up.
„Want me to move?“
Two nods. You glide in, let your hips do the work how they want to. You don’t trust your online shopping choices, but your tempo, at least. Yuzuru is making all choked up noises trying to gobble up all the girth he gets, his fingers entangled in your harness. It keeps him in a steady place.
You can work from that, angle a few superficial thrusts into his mouth to get the saliva flowing. The blotch on your bed is already pretty nasty. The slow pace is apt enough to fill Yuzu’s mouth with spit bubbles that begin to foam out bit by bit.
After two more minutes of light back and forth, Yuzuru pulls off to speak.
„Please do it stronger. I don’t mind being hoarse.“
Not a second later, all he does is slurp up a very dripping shaft again. With difficulty jamming it in past the first few inches, but determined, anyway. You didn’t expect anything else.
Yuzu’s lips and eyes are all glossy by now. The portion of lube-infused spit has accumulated at his jaw already, soon to travel down to his throat.
Stronger, he says. Why not.
„Okay, get ready.“
„M—hm!“
An abrasive jab follows a shallow one. If it wasn’t for the lube, your dick would scrape right down his upper throat. But this way, the first dip goes in with sufficient slip and slide, not leaving Yuzu with too much dick in his neck for long. All your strap-on does is bounce right back.
What you do hear is Yuzu’s gag reflex… claiming its rights. Still understated, but nevertheless there. After three more thrusts, you decide to stay about halfway balls deep, watching Yuzuru squirm, even try to shove in about an inch more by pressing his head forward. His breath is clean and deep through his nose. You put a checkmark on the my-boyfriend-has-asthma list in your mind.
„You look good with a dick in your mouth.“
What is supposedly a ‚thanks‘ ends up as gargling and choking. Yuzuru starts getting wet eyes at this point. Even a little bow of his head is something that doesn’t slip past your attention. Mannered guy, isn’t he.
That praise makes him do the horniest noises is also something that you make a memo of. Along with seeing how it’s rendering him all aroused. You’ve seen those neck veins and red chin spots come out plenty of times to know.
A couple more thrusts are not a bad option, you decide. Although it seems that Yuzuru had the idea to hollow out his cheeks that very moment. The vacuum first makes your cock plunge in a little too fast than intended, then naturally pulls Yuzu’s head forward once you move your hips back again.
It’s why the second thrust catches him off guard, flattening his lips and making your dick slide into his throat with air going in. Yuzu ends up choking hopelessly. It doesn’t look like he’s retreating his head in the very least, however.
Instead, you feel his hands grab at your either hip to secure himself in place. A glance from above, slightly angled sideward, shows you just how hard and throbbing Yuzu’s own dick is, tipping against his stomach.
Once again, you make an impressed-my-dear face that he doesn’t overlook. His cheeks go hollow again and he keeps up the indulgent speed. Increasingly getting rougher and more pain-craving. Messier. Desperate.
Yuzu opens his mouth wider not to have his teeth get in the way. It’s serious business now. His throat makes the most disgusting, grunting noises. Oh. Shit. Yuzu’s greed and sloppy lips make your body burn up. Soreness is the very least he’s headed for.
„Wow, Yuzu. Wow.“
It’s not something you didn’t know already. This man is without a singular doubt a lunatic. You whisper more praises to him, your hands grabbing hold of his head to sustain the movement rhythmically.
Yuzu’s gag reflex has proven to only rebel every other thrust so you can pound away, at that time already giving up even the mattress that must be sopping wet to its core with Yuzuru drooling all over it. Too late for a towel altogether but fuck it.
Yuzu takes the choking well. He’s leaking spit all over, surrenders to your hands. Even if he doesn’t manage to deepthroat the entire length of the dick, he manages an awful lot of inches. By now, he’s gotten the hang of not letting too much air in. All while relaxing his muscles.
Beautiful hums, chokes, little whines. Too bad your phone isn’t close by. Recording this has to be your very next bucket list entry. You’re glad he asked about this.
You go on thrusting for a few more times until you feel your hips going tired. Once his nose starts getting all runny, you naturally slow down even more. Eventually, you help Yuzuru pull his head off. His lips are all puffy.
„B—woah,“ it’s all he can moan and splurt out, and you help him wipe the glob of saliva and snot from his chin with your sleeve.
Your pajama shirt might be ruined, but not as much as Yuzu’s tonsils. Who knows just how many times you were deep and fast enough to make them throb from all that friction. Seven, eight times? His food for tomorrow can be a light soup at best. Not even you were as sore after riding and sucking every last drop out of his dick last Monday.
You’re glad he has the rice cakes going through his system right now. Poor onlooker Winnie the Pooh is probably traumatized by now. There’s only so much crazy dicksucking a bear can handle watching. And still, he gazes at the two of you— in good spirits as ever, cheeks big and bright. In a way, he looks like Yuzu in this very moment.
„How you like it?,“ you softly caress his pinkish lips. „I need to know how many stars to leave on the website.“
It takes a few moments until he can form words again. His speech is fast. He’s still staring at the dildo.
„It was in so deep and, and on my tongue. The dick veins, I could feel them. They were like, like, it was massaging my lips. And I almost thought I could swallow it.“
You raise your brows. Lord knows how deep your cock was inside his brain, but he still picks these things up.
„Attention to detail. Nice.“
Maybe 4.5 stars are a fair deal. At least for throat fucking. The rest — remains to be seen.
„Did I do well?“
His eyes widen. The question is genuine. It’s not something you’d think he would ask. Whenever he trained, he would always rely on his own judgment.
„Ask yourself first, you were the one feeling it.“
That’s not the answer he expected, and he ends up getting red cheeks.
„I liked it,“ he stammers. „Was really hot.“
„It’s what I saw, too. Good job, babe.“
He’s blushing even more now.
„Ah— I think I tried my best.“
You smile and cup his slobbery face. So you’ve taken his throat virginity in the most spit-heavy way possible. He looks cuter than ever.
„Listen. You’re a champ. If I could, I would cum deep inside of you.“
„I think, that would be romantic,“ his wet lips break into an upbeat smile. Yuzu’s eyes get all crinkly.
„You bet.“
A big doting kiss for Yuzu’s forehead is the only thing your brain can conjure up at this point, so you briefly lean down to do it. Maybe Shia LaBeouf is not just exclusively at home in Yuzu’s imagination.
What you have to admit is that Yuzu’s overflowing athlete’s spirit has easily taken over your hips. You didn’t think you could move properly for that long. Maybe you still have some energy reservoirs left.
„And, and now?“
„I can stuff you with more dick. Up to you. Mister Lube didn’t run out yet. And if Pooh still likes watching.“
By instinct, Yuzuru’s hands snake behind his back to grip his ass, stroking what he knows is your delightful next target. You can tell by his eyes that there are a thousand scenarios going through his head.
„Pooh likes this… very much. He’s never seen something like that before. I think he is curious.“
It doesn’t take a Sherlock’s mind for you to know that he means— himself.
„I mean. I was surprised. If that monster fits into your little throat,“ you add, „anything is possible.“
That’s the final straw.
„I’ll do it,“ he says, moments later on all fours, face lowered and then rested sidewards on the bed, spreading his ass cheeks. Decision making when it comes to strap stuff is Yuzu’s forte, you jot that down in your invisible sex life journal. Not one bit of hesitation. By the looks of it, a very twitching entrance is waiting for you.
Testing period is over.
„Alright. I got something to drive home.“
Now that you think of it. If his ass is already only half as naughty as his mouth, you’ll need the help of a higher power.
„Shit. I think, it relaxes.“
At the expense of your mattress and blanket getting even more greasy with lube, you ease in the tip after massaging it into his sphincter. Yuzu’s ass still has to deal with that new sensation given how his leg muscles are going all bonkers. But indeed he’s grown receptive.
„Comfy like that?“
„B—big…“
„Attention, just a little tweak before I go on. Here.“
You softly press down on his spine with your palm entirely flat, and his back obliges immediately. His arch is leaving you breathless.
Yuzu’s head and chest are snug and soft against the bed while his ass is far, far up. He smiles seeing you venerate his back, he didn’t miss your reaction in the least. No surprise a third of your cock gets sucked into his ass just moments later. It caught you off guard.
Judging by Yuzu’s little yelp and his eyes rolling back, the way you went right into him has found pleasure. The bedposts creak a little because Yuzuru’s legs are shivering. As is his voice.
„I love it, I lo-, please, my, my ass!“
„Can I move?“
„Yes, please!“
The arch did the trick. You love your boyfriend. What follows is a slowly plunging series of rewards, ten, eleven times, pulling at his gripping asshole until it surrenders into going loose. Yuzuru has almost accommodated a third of the length you’re engraving into his ass. You’ll definitely keep using that brand of lube.
„Here, babe. I got a present for your prostate.“
Yuzu is making your favorite lawless face when you hit the spot, controlling the base of the dildo with two your fingers going around it like a cock ring. He looks as if someone just handed him a trophy too big to carry. From his perineum, a thread of lube comes dripping down with a squelching noise. The poor sheets. It’s another virginity taken.
In the meantime, Yuzu grabs hold of the duvet with unsteady hands. His entire torso is nothing but a shaky mess. So erratic. And sweaty. And docile. And beautiful. You want to award him plenty, your little present from above, the jittery boy underneath you.
Pounding away and making him grit his teeth is worth heading for a mean cramp, you don’t care. Watching how your cock is plowing in and out of him at jerky angles with the absolute lewdest, bubbling noises recompensates for anything.
Yuzu’s rolling eyes have become spaced out and teary, making him look like a crying saint about to enter the golden gates of heaven. Who knew angels had black hair.
With every stroke, his ass becomes every bit accepting to the point of almost glaring open to let you thrust in. Thank God. You compliment yourself on not falling short of the arguably lofty promise to relax him. Moaning Yuzu’s little ass is swallowing it all.
By the time, his rectum is going hollow and sticky, welcoming every move of yours by giving you ample right of passage. During some thrusts, you don’t even see his sphincter hold on to the dildo at all. His ass is almost as dilated as his loose mouth itself. Your thrusts are working on their own again at this point. What instinct is propelling you, who knows.
You love the sight and the happy squeals. You tease him with more speed. Not without effect, your hips lunge and aim deep all the more. You penetrate him far enough to start an excavation for ancient relics next Monday. With the tempo increasing, so does the chesty volume in his voice.
„It’s,“ he cries out, „in my belly! Ah! Ah, shit! Shit...“
You see Yuzu let go of the duvet with his left hand. It promptly darts way down to his abdomen where his fingers grope around.
„I can feel it,“ he whines, „It’s rubbing there, it’s a big bump!“
You sure won’t deprive your own hand from that sensation and reach right down, too. Which means leaning forward— and stuffing your strap even harder into his guts. Yuzu gasps out loud. Both your hands meet fondling about, cupping the sensitive area in search for the imprint of the dildo.
What Yuzu says is not understated. His slender little belly is all bulged out in the bottom quarter. Since he’s so thin, it’s almost scary how much your cock just dents him out and twists around.
„Jesus, Yuzu,“ you let your hand roam next to his, even lightly squeezing the area. It’s what really riles him.
What you thought was the maximum for him to take turns out to be nothing but a mere start. Yuzu is so obsessed to feel the bulge more that he starts bucking his ass onto your cock with the most unbridled voice cracks.
You can’t lie. His moans make your jaw drop. His usually so controlled body on the ice is now wrecking and writhing itself to get more dick.
A thin line of sweat goes on a pilgrimage down his spine already. He impales himself more, gyrates his hips more, whines out more. You wonder how he keeps it together and doesn’t spritz all his cum over the bed and the floor tiles.
It’s the sheer force of will. Always hungry for the next level. You can’t help but admire how enduring he is. And that’s just the first time.
Yuzu’s feet have become agitated on the sheets, responding to every thrust by dangling and swishing around. Yesterday, his right ankle was all stiff and even a bit swollen. Now, it’s moving all over the place. Looks like doggy style is putting all the tension off the ligaments. It’s something else you take deliberate note of.
After five more thrusts and hearing his whimpers getting all drawn-out, eventually, you retreat for a break, letting your cock rest on his left ass cheek. Yuzu inhales, gathering himself. He looks at you with big, glazed bambi eyes. Maybe even a bit incredulous.
„Am I, am I gaping?“
You don’t have to check twice to know.
„All lose. If you knew how far I can see inside of you. Hole new world.“
„Y/N!“
He can’t hold eye contact now.
„Naughty, huh. But I like what I see.“
Goddamn great ass. You firmly smack Yuzu squarely across his right butt cheek. He twitches, clenches, bites his lips more. They tremble.
„Ah! You tease!“
„Want me to put it in again?“
Wild nodding. Looks like Yuzu’s usual voracity on the ice does an easy, albeit not entirely seamless transfer to bed, too. He still ogles what is about to stretch him out again with due respect. He still can’t fathom something this massive was inside of him, you can tell.
Once you start moving again, you notice his feet and thigh muscles violently jerking. His prostate has gotten all sensitive. Probably all spongy and large by now.
You decide to angle yourself differently and take a deep breath. Impossible to draw this out any longer. From the vicinity of Yuzu’s pillow, you grasp the Winnie Pooh plush toy and maneuver it into his awaiting embrace. He holds it tight in an instant.
With impatient hands, you fumble around the bed for the lube bottle until you find it next to his right foot. Two, three, four generous squeezes onto his asshole, not very accurate at all. Several fine, oily traces end up trickling down his inner thighs. You don’t even bother closing the bottle properly anymore. Too much adrenaline.
„Grab those sheets and Pooh, Yuzu, grab hard.“
„I got it!“
„Time I fuck you up. If you’re ready?“
„Yes, make me cum, make me cum! Please break my ass,“ he’s whimpering. So badly. „I want it! I want it all inside.“
Mister Lube has a last job to handle.
Yuzu has crammed three fingers into his mouth once you get a hold of his hair and deliver the last hard movements. He takes the blows all babbling and sucking himself off. How his ass is not completely falling apart by now is a miracle of nature. Or maybe, just the blessing of his daily training.
The room is heavy with the scent of sweat and cherries. He’s loosened his core so much that sliding in is not a question of you avoiding a cramp anymore, but technique. You feel focused to zero in and not miss the sweet, tender spot. It makes him mewl the first time you push your dick tip right into it.
The second time, his eyes get big and fluttering.
„Please. Please, hurt me,“ he salivates, then eventually, grabs his plush harder. „Hurt me bad. I’m really begging you.“
Fast to oblige, you claw your hands around his waist and pull his body backwards. The ten nails digging into him are only the last needed set-up. The last jab comes in crisp, landing a severe and punctuated shock. Yuzu’s ass smacks up hard at your loins. The pain quickly snakes right up his spine and leaves his face contorted.
„Oh fuck…!“
Small, shaking Yuzu cums like fifty fireworks going off at once. Not even releasing his screams into the duvet really helps to mute out the heaviness of the first waves. You keep your cock right in place and let it buffer into his prostate at will.
Yuzu’s legs kick and tangle under you like pasta in boiling water. He cries and groans and curses, and cries out even more. You can see his entire back muscles at work now, going like clockwork. His moans each sound so ecstatic, it registers as a different language to you. He spirals far into his orgasm, sobbing, and it looks beautiful.
„Amazing, Yuzu.“
His semen lands all over his sternum and the sheets, shooting out in several bursts, one more pumping than the other. It’s almost as if all that strawberry juice converted nicely into a blotchy, white fluid.
His dick is still tensing up completely sensitive. Releasing cum, up until his legs stop going all over the place. Yuzu doesn’t let the sperm cool for twenty seconds that he already reaches down to pick it up, jerking his cock a last dozen times, only to bring to his mouth what his fingers collected. He sucks up all of it.
„Delicious, baby?“
„M—hm!“
„So nicely milked.“
His relished expression. You imagine that this must have been how the gods first tasted nectar.
While he licks away, Yuzu goes limp head to toe with you carefully pulling out your dick. Inch by inch. Not pulling. Only gliding.
Once you’ve removed the tip, he collapses into a sniffing, giggly puddle of serotonin. Crying, even when you lend him both your hands to lay his face into.
He’s so gorgeous.
Breathing hard, sweaty, drooling and messed up. His body is so steamy and loose, splayed out all the way before you. His entrance has turned all pink so beautifully. Hot. As. Fuck.
Most psychologists would envy you for being able to gaze this far into Yuzuru Hanyu’s innermost clenching being. How his ass is going to close until tomorrow’s competition, you don’t know.
Time to pray he won’t digest these savory cakes too fast. Then again, he didn’t eat properly at all. His body is probably soaking up all the fruit and rice in their entirety.
You pat his lower back gently, making sure to lay him down into a sleeping position already. Pooh is right by his side. Yuzu’s legs are still so dangly.
He’s really let go completely. You’ve not fucked his ass, but his soul.
You want to thank him for trusting you so much. Beside the shady black box manufacturer.
The bed is a glorious mess.
Removing the strap-on harness makes you feel just how loosened your own limbs have become, too. Come to think of it, this might be your new heavy-duty workout. None of your friends know you do this kind of cardio involving the best ass in the whole city as your personal trainer.
Yuzu’s butt has turned you into a drenched, wobbly homo sapiens that will probably look in the mirror by tomorrow and proclaim herself a bodybuilder from those sheer muscle burn gains.
When the two of you show up at the rink tomorrow, you both need hunky guys carrying you in by the armpits or something.
And the whole world will wonder how Yuzu’s wonky ankle magically recovered overnight but he can’t sit.
Changing the duvet at quarter past twelve with an unmovable Yuzu on top of it seems like a thing of the impossible. It’s soiled, it’s sweaty, it would probably make it to the first page if a reporter ever got hold of it.
But you take it pragmatically and opt for sleeping on Yuzu’s cleaner side of the bed intertwined. It’s surprisingly dry there. Big laundry day tomorrow, anyway.
The only thing you manage to do is reach for the window to open and to grab a glass of water from the bedstand to share. He’s chugging the remaining half down in one go. His hands? Oh wonder.
More than steady.
He calmed completely. After he puts down the glass, you scoot closer to him.
„Your foot — better?“
„Oh? I didn’t even think about it.“
He wriggles his left leg back and forth underneath the blanket, then concludes with a surprised face:
„It’s turning pretty well? I think you hit a nerve. Maybe you should split me in half more often.“
He shrugs. Yuzu’s serious face while saying that so dryly makes you laugh.
„Looks like it,“ you draw out the open lube bottle from beside you, finally closing the lid. „Do you… need a towel?“
„I just need you. I have to be disgusting for once.“
„I’ll scrape that all off tomorrow before we leave. Hot shower, five tons of shampoo. I’ll be breaking out the stuff you clean your skates with if I have to.“
That makes Yuzu chuckle. In fact, he beams a little.
„Sounds like something to look forward to.“
„I hope you can walk, anyway. Is it painful?“
Your biggest sorrow at this point. Taking his mind off was easy, but now he’s got boneless legs. Your conscience nags you for dicking him down out of all possible things.
„You have your weapon license now. I gotta admit… the last one…“
…was ass destruction 3.0, you complete his sentence in your mind. It’s nothing a normal human being could have stomached. „I’ll manage, though. I still feel my legs.“
„God, how does he do it.“
A smug „He’s Yuzuru Hanyu, that’s how, aw yeah!“ is what you imagine God’s answer to sound like. But instead, all you get is a little smile. Very well, from the little God in your bed.
„Pooh did this. When I squeezed him, I knew I could take it.“
He reaches to the middle of the bed. Five consecutive head pats for the bear plushie and Yuzu looks content already.
„Winning medals with just one working ankle is the same as doing it with a demolished ass to you, huh.“
„It’s not demolished, it’s improved and overhauled,“ he smiles. „Never felt any better. It was really good how you did this.“
It’s his strangest sport philosophy yet. But if you know one thing, it’s that Yuzu’s bizarre body hacks have gotten him the podium every time. You can already see him asking for another strap round before your mind’s eye. Before the next competition, at least.
„You honestly blow my mind.“
„And your dick, tomorrow night,“ goes Yuzu’s cheeky winner grin. There it is. Insatiable how you love it. You already feel the need to google ‚hip thrust strengthening exercises’.
Maybe, if science advances to that point one day, you honestly clone yourself so double your capacity. And so that you can spitroast him. Maybe you order another dildo from the website and pin it to the wall, anyways.
„Must be Mister Lube who did all of this.“
„I want to buy more of it tomorrow. Any other groceries we need, anyway? I’ll be cleaning the floor, too. I hope I’m not too worn-out after skating.“
„We’ll do one thing after the other, alright. There are still rice cakes left for breakfast, those will get you through the day.“
You’ve seen how much of an energy burst the cakes gave him.
„I really like those,“ he mumbles, then nuzzles into the pillow, sucking in your hair’s scent. Oh, it’s the moment you waited for. „Snickers diva… happy.“
A very cheery, puffy face slowly comes to rest beside you now, hair going in all directions. Infallible and ever-returning: Professor Yuzu’s explosive hairdo. Pooh is all clingy at his chest. A little worn from all the squeezing, but still with an amicable chuckle. You smile from ear to ear. It’s the most adorable thing you’ve ever seen.
You kiss Yuzuru’s little nose and lips until he’s making sleepy sounds. Either this is a late-night mirage created by your very moan-tested ears, or he is actually purring. You make sure the Pooh plush resting at his chest faces him correctly, then clear away the remaining strawberries, shut the window, arrange the blanket, put on your pajamas properly.
The humidifier whirrs in the background while tiger baby does one last big yawn before drifting off. In a matter of two minutes, maybe even less than that.
Just as you reach toward the bedstand to switch off the light, Yuzu’s hand curls into your shirt from behind. You turn, he is all dozed off. Not one leg fidgeting. However, talking in his sleep with his hand nestled into your PJs.
„Big hug please, Pooh mama.“
© 2017-2020 submissive-bangtan. all rights reserved. do not repost. for entertainment purposes only. all portrayals fictive.
#figure skating#yuzuru hanyu#yuzuru hanyu smut#yuzuru hanyu x reader#yuzuru hanyu fanfic#figure skating fanfic#fs#figure skating smut#sub!yuzuru#dom!reader#treats for you#original content
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Pairing: Felix x gender neutral reader
Genre: romance, fluff
Word Count: ~3,600
Warnings: none
Notes: I don’t know what it is about Felix but whenever I look at him, I get summer teen movie vibes and it makes me want to scream. Also I call Chan ‘Chris’ in this for reasons lmao
Summary: Two chaotic best friends, a questionable car, and the entire world to explore.
Everything about this impromptu trip was going wrong, yet you can’t help but laugh at the sheer ridiculousness of it all.
Felix has a streak of grease on his cheek from trying to fix whatever went wrong with his old car and you’re seated on the side of the road on a picnic blanket sipping an apple juice box as you wait. This wasn’t the first thing to blow up in your face since you started this trip five hours ago.
Thirty minutes in your trip, Felix realized he left his camera at home and so he U-turned and sped a little to make up for lost time. Three hours later after waking up from a nap, you get a sinking feeling in your stomach that maybe you didn’t lock the door to your apartment. It’s remedied by simply texting your neighbor to check for you, but it did put a damper on your mood for a while.
And now, the car has broken down and the two of you are stranded in the middle of nowhere with very bad cell signal. No one has driven by in the last thirty minutes. Under the summer sun, you and Felix pushed the car to the side of the road and glared at it until you sighed and dug through the trunk for a juice box.
“Do you know how to fix it?” you asked.
He shrugged, running his fingers through his hair and pulling at the roots. “We’ll see.”
It’s been edging towards an hour now so you call Felix over and pat the empty space beside you. He scoots over on his butt and knocks every limb against yours in an attempt to get comfortable. You know he’s being obnoxious so you elbow him back.
“This is a mess,” he says.
You shrug, dropping your head onto his shoulder and sucking air from the juice box. “At least we’re hanging out together.”
Felix lets out a laugh, rubbing his fingers against the smear on his cheek in an attempt to wipe it away. “Yeah. I have you.”
You hide a smile, tingles appearing underneath your skin as Felix leans his head on top of yours. You stare at the broken down car, thinking that even if everything went wrong, at least it was with Felix.
You’re two hours behind schedule when Felix gets the car going again and you make a stop to grab some food. It slips both your minds to call the hotel and tell them that you’ll be late for the room reservations so by the time you get there the rooms are gone. You’re back in the car now, sitting under a flickering streetlight, feeling a little defeated at it all.
“This was a terrible idea,” Felix mutters. He rolls down his window, huffing at how much energy it takes for him to do so. It has a manual crank. His car is that old. The evening air is a lot better than the stifling summer heat, so you roll down the window on your side too. You leave your arm hanging out of the car, fingers twitching as if trying to grab onto the breezes that slip through.
“The trip was not a terrible idea,” you correct. You tilt your head and give your best friend a soft smile. “It was a terrible start. But it’ll get better. We have two weeks left on this.”
Felix groans. “Two weeks left for things to go wrong, you mean?”
You wet your lips. “Felix.”
“What,” he pouts.
“How far are we from the beach?”
“Like a thirty minute drive?”
You pull in your arm and turn your body in the seat to face him fully. “Do you think we can make it there to see the sunset?”
Felix blinks at you, eye wide, before the sparkle in them returns and an absolutely blinding smile blooms on his lips and lights up his entire face. “We can try.”
You barely make it in time. After Felix snaps a ton of photos with his camera, you sit on the hood of his car, head on his steady shoulder, his arm around yours, as you watch the sun descend in the horizon, another warped sun reflected on the ocean waves that seem to stretch onto forever and beyond. Felix’s fingers are drumming on your arm, slightly sticky from the heat and sweat, but you don’t really mind.
There isn’t much to say, so you sit in silence. A lot has happened in the past day and it would be a lie to say that you weren’t worried for how the rest of this trip was going to go. But you don’t voice those thoughts. Felix already has enough on his mind and you don’t need to make him feel any worse for suggesting this trip.
You’re so caught up in the beauty of it all that it takes Felix’s arm slipping from your shoulder to realize that he’s fallen asleep. You turn your head slightly, just enough to see him out of the corner of your eye and not wake him up. His eyelashes lay prettily against his golden skin, dotted with the stars. That feeling hits you again, the one that makes your heart ache a little. You know what it is, but you can’t act on it.
“Felix,” you whisper.
His nose twitches first and then his eyes flutter open. “Sorry,” he says. His voice is rough with sleep and it makes you shiver.
“I’ll drive,” you say. “We have to find somewhere to stay.”
He doesn’t argue, digging through the pockets of his shorts to pull out the keys and hand them over. “Okay. I’ll navigate.”
Somehow, Navigator Felix does worse than Driver Felix, and you take a break by finding a drive thru to grab dinner.
“Get me a milkshake,” Felix whines. He shakes your shoulder in that petulant childish way.
“Bro, you’re lactose,” you say, batting his hands away.
“Your point is?”
You roll your eyes and inch forward in the line to stop at the speaker. “Hi, can I get two number fours, a large fries, and a medium soda please?”
“My milkshake, y/n!”
“And a chocolate milkshake. Thank you!” You’re not sure what your hand hits when you swing your arm back blindly to push him away, but Felix lets out a garbled sound and finally settles down. The satisfied noise that he makes when you hand him the bag of food and tray with the drinks makes you smile. “Feed me,” you say.
Felix holds a fry to your lips. “If I am not mistaken, there’s a motel five minutes down this road.”
You hum. “Another,” you say, opening your mouth and waiting for Felix to pop another fry in. “I’m going to shower, eat this burger, and knock out.”
“Are we sleeping in tomorrow?” he asks. Felix has already unwrapped his burger and started munching his way through it. “Please charge your phone and leave the ringer on so you can wake up when I call you. I don’t want to pound at your door and have people look at me weird in the hallway.”
“Yeah, whatever. I’ll figure it out then. Ahh.”
Felix gives you two fries this time. “I don’t think waking you up is something to figure out tomorrow,” Felix says.
You shrug. “I’m just trying to get through this day by day. We’ll be fine.”
You are not fine.
“We only have one room left, I’m sorry,” the receptionist says. He grimaces. “It’s summer, so we get a lot of guests during this time,” he explains. “Would you like to book it anyway?”
Part of you wants to facepalm because of course other people would also be on a trip like you. What were you expecting during peak travel weather? You turn to look at Felix and he blinks back at you slowly. He looks tired and is probably drifting into a food coma as he’s standing right next to you. In other words, he’s no help.
“We’ll take it,” you say. “Available for two nights and two days, right?”
“That’s correct.”
“Felix, go sit down.” You nudge him on the side, nearly sending him stumbling into a fake potted plant. He grabs his bags and your suitcase and drags them to a nearby sofa to crash on. You watch him go before turning back and dealing with payment.
Soon, you’re climbing up to the second floor of the motel. Felix has woken up slightly now, probably slowly feeling the effects of that milkshake. You’re going to kill him if you don’t get to shower first.
“Felix Lee, I am showering first and you cannot stop me,” you say as you unlock the door to the room and flick on the light.
Your jaw slowly drops.
“Lemme in,” Felix grumbles. He squeezes between you and the door and plops down at the edge of the bed. “Close the door so we can turn on the AC,” he whines.
You blink. “That dude just– He– Huh?”
Felix lifts his head up slightly. “What’s wrong?”
“There’s only one bed?”
He blinks before his lips form a small “o” and his eyes widen as recognition sinks in. “That is a problem.” Felix rolls onto his stomach and stretches like a cat. “Another problem is that you need to shower now.”
You huff, dragging all the luggage into the room and then shutting the door behind you. “Give me fifteen minutes,” you say.
“Not a second longer.”
You can’t sleep. Maybe it’s the AC running a little too loud, or the weird shadows that slip through the blinds in the window, or whatever the people in the room above you are doing. You turn on your side one more time, letting out a long breath through your nose as you blink tiredly. You don’t know what time it is, but it’s pretty late.
Felix fell asleep a while ago, snoring quietly from where he set out a makeshift bed on the floor. He’s silent now but he lets out little steady puffs that let you know he’s still dreaming.
This position on your side is uncomfortable, so you turn onto your back again. The bed is too soft and your sweater pillow a little too lumpy. After winning a round of rock, paper, scissors, you gave Felix the two pillows to make up for the fact he was sleeping on the floor and squished a sweater into a ball for yourself. He had protested at first but you gave him your meanest glare and Felix just ruffled your hair and didn’t put up a fight.
The ceiling becomes boring to look at, so you turn the other way.
Felix rustles, turning in his sleep as well.
You freeze, waiting for the sound of his steady breath to return. But it doesn’t.
“Y/n.” Felix’s voice is rough with sleep. He kind of sounds like a demon but a cute one, if that makes any sense. You’re tired but the thought amuses you.
“Yeah?”
“You keep moving.”
“Sorry.”
“Are you okay?”
You chew on your lower lip, holding back your words long enough for Felix to sit up from the floor. His hair is a bird’s nest and he blinks sleepily at you, clutching a pillow to his chest.
“What’s wrong?” he asks.
“Can’t sleep,” you say. You count the beats in your chest. One. Two. Three. “Come up.”
Felix takes roughly five seconds to move from the floor onto the bed, scooting you over by poking your side until you move. He replaces your sweater pillow with a real pillow, and then squishes you against the wall when he lies down beside you. “Okay, sleep now.”
You let out a small laugh. “It’s not that easy.”
“Huh.” Felix lifts your head with a hand and slips his other arm under. When he lets go, your head rests on his shoulder, his other arm draped over your middle. “Okay, how about now?”
It’s summer, and normally you would hate being this close to someone else when the heat in the air is enough to make everything feel icky. But this is Felix. And instead of making your skin feel sticky and gross, he sends your mind into overdrive and your heart racing even faster than that.
Felix taps your back with his fingers. “Sleep,” he says. “We have to explore tomorrow. No naps.”
You tuck your head under his chin. In this position, your forehead is rested against his chest. You wonder if you listened a little harder, if you would be able to hear the sound of his heart beating in his chest. You wonder if it’s pounding as fast as yours.
Listening to the sound of Felix’s soft breaths, and feeling his chest rise and fall against your skin, you drift into sleep, dreaming of nothing but you and Felix and the entire world at your fingertips.
You spend the entirety of the next day at the beach. Felix spends half of it in the ocean, terrorizing you with the water he manages to cup in his tiny hands, and the other half ordering to either pose or get out of his way as he takes pictures.
This time, when the sun begins to set, you two stretch out in the sand, leaning into each other’s personal space as Felix shows off his favorite captures.
“Why won’t you let me take pictures of you?” you ask.
Felix shrugs, clicking through his camera and then leaning over to show you another picture. His shoulders are pink, showing signs of a mild sunburn he’ll probably whine to you about later. His hair is still damp from where he you pushed him into the water earlier, blond locks sticking to his forehead in little clumps.
“Y/n.”
“Huh?”
“You’re staring.” Felix wiggles his eyebrows. “Can you tell I’ve been working out with Chris?” He leaves his camera on his lap to do some weird flexing thing with his arm.
“No?” you say.
Felix clicks his tongue. “Rude.” He sticks out his tongue as he picks up his camera again. “Look at this one I got. If you post it on Instagram, I better get tagged as the best photographer ever.”
You smile. “Okay.”
Felix grins. “I wanna get some pictures of the sunset, and then we can go get dinner.” He dusts sand off his beach shorts, taking care to not let any fly in your direction, and then bounces off.
There’s a warm feeling that starts from your toes and creeps upwards until it reaches the tips of your ears. As much as you want to blame it on the sand and the heat of the sun, you know there’s no point in trying. Even with something as amazing as a star slipping from the sky, you can’t take your eyes off Felix.
“Why is it so hard for you to sleep?” Felix asks after you turn for the nth time in bed that night. You freeze when his arms wrap around your middle and pull until your back is pressed flush against his chest. “You’re driving in the morning.”
“Thinking a lot,” you murmur.
“You think too much.” Felix nuzzles his nose against the back of your neck. “What are you thinking about?”
A beat of silence. Felix’s arms tighten ever the slightest around your waist. “What’s going to happen after this trip is over,” you say.
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, we just graduated. In a few months, I’ll be moving back home and we’ll both be moving on with our lives. We’re out in the real world now.”
“But why are you thinking about that now?”
You’re not sure. Is it because the person you’ve had by your side for the last four years of your life is literally spooning you and making you question how platonic this was all supposed to be? Is it because you’re afraid you’re looking too deep into all of this and Felix will go back to being untouchable when this trip is all over? Is it because you don’t want to leave it all behind when you fly thousands of miles away to go back home? Or all of the above?
“Talk to me, y/n.” His fingers are drumming against your hip. Index, middle, ring, and back again.
“Because I’m scared.”
“Of?”
You suppress a shudder when Felix’s lips brush against the shell of your ear when he speaks. You count the number of taps, waiting until ten before you turn around. Felix’s hand slides off your hip and he meets your eyes when you settle. He gives you an encouraging nod, eyes soft around the corners and nose scrunched up just enough that the little freckle on his nostril is visible in the light seeping through the window. Your gaze lingers on his lips, tracing his Cupid’s bow and how his lips curve into a slight smile. “Losing everything I have here…Losing you.”
The way Felix’s eyes turn into little half-moons when he smiles is enchanting.
“When you sat and watched the sunset today, were you afraid you were never going to see it again?”
You shake your head.
“Right? Because it’ll come back again every day. So even if you’re stuck in the darkness for a short time, the sun will always rise again. And you’ll start a new day, with new opportunities.” Felix’s tongue darts out to wet his lips, eyes flickering to yours before moving back to hold eye contact. “When you move away, it’s going to be hard. I understand why you’re scared. But the sun will rise and you’ll be okay.” He finds your hand and laces his fingers in between yours. “We’ll both be okay.” A squeeze.
“We?”
Felix only smiles. He releases his grip on your hand and pulls you until your forehead is rested against his chest like last night. “Sleep,” he says.
So you do.
“How was your trip?”
“You would think after the first day at the beach that Felix would remember to put on sunscreen, but the dude got sunburned like every other day,” you say. You ignore the indignant squawk he makes and continue to sip on your soda. “The car broke down the first day. We missed our first hotel booking and got stuck in a lowkey sketchy motel with only one bed. I won rock, paper, scissors and I got the bed, so it wasn’t too bad,” you say, raising another finger with every recollection. “And then Felix decided it would be a great idea to get ice cream for the road and save it for later.”
Chris frowns. “Aren’t you lactose?” he asks Felix.
You slap a hand onto the table. “Exactly,” you hiss. “And he didn’t think that it would melt so we had sticky fingers until I found a gas station to stop by. And then the car broke down again.”
“Okay, you can stop exposing me now,” Felix whines.
“I wanna see pictures. Felix was hyping them up so much on the group chat,” Hyunjin says. Seungmin perks up from his phone when Felix takes out his camera. He leaves the two of them to click through the photos themselves.
“You didn’t answer my question about how the trip was though. Good? Bad? Rating out of ten please. I need to know in case he decides to spring a random trip on me,” Chris says.
“Yeah, like I would ask you on a trip with me,” Felix says with a roll of his eyes.
You bite down on the straw as you think. Felix is now giving you puppy dog eyes so you purposely don’t look at him. “Uhh, if we were to ignore all the things we couldn’t control, ten out of ten.”
Felix raises both hands into the air in victory. “This is why you’re the best, y/n!” He wiggles around like those inflatable floppy men in front of car dealerships. Seungmin has to whack his arm to get him to stop.
Chris scoffs. “He bribed you, didn’t he?”
You shake your head. “No, it was a good trip. I enjoyed it. Ten out of ten would go again.”
“Are you saying that because he’s Felix or because the trip was really good? Because I think if any one of us took you on a trip where the car broke down multiple times, you’d give us a big zero.” Hyunjin asks. He turns the camera to you and raises an eyebrow. “I hope you have a good explanation for this picture.”
“Wait, I wanna see,” Chris scoots his chair over to peer into the camera. “Oh, man, you two are gross.”
“Give my camera back,” Felix says. He wiggles an arm into the shield his friends made around his camera, but Chris swats him out of the way.
“You didn’t think to delete those pictures before you brought the camera here?” you ask. You feel the heat in your cheeks but there’s also a smile you can’t hide.
“It’s not like we didn’t know something was going to happen on the trip. Felix and y/n alone for two weeks?” Hyunjin fans himself with a hand and pulls a weird face. Seungmin smacks him. “This is not a PG distance!” Hyunjin says.
Felix leans backwards until his head is rested on your shoulder and he’s staring at you upside down. His eyes are glittering as they blink innocently at you. “Since you said, ‘ten out of ten would go again’ this means you have to take me to see the sunset in your favorite places when you go home.” He grins. “Road trip part two?”
#felix#stray kids#stray kids imagines#stray kids scenarios#felix imagines#felix scenarios#stray kids felix#lee felix#fluff
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So this request is kinda specific... If you wouldn't mind could you write where the reactions to Team nekoma meeting their first year manager for the first time, manager walks in and trips or something. Luckily one of the boys steps in and saves manager. But manager is socially anxious and just freezes. But once they warm up to the boys their all bubbly,cute and dorky(a babie)
This request had me like 💖🥺💕💖🥺💕 thank u sm for it i LOVED writing it dmsnsjzin
𝒩𝑒𝓀𝑜𝓂𝒶’𝓈 𝒞𝓊𝓉𝑒 𝒩𝑒𝓌 𝑀𝒶𝓃𝒶𝑔𝑒𝓇 𝐻𝑒𝒶𝒹𝒸𝒶𝓃𝑜𝓃𝓈
🐱 Nekoma have always wanted a cute manager. Nekoma were NOT expecting to get anything almost as cute as you.
🐱 Kuroo tells them all about you before you come in, and more importantly WARNS them not to freak out or act too animalistic around you the first time bc the LAST thing he wants to do is scare their new manager off
🐱 They’re all practicing one day: Yaku’s scolding Lev for arriving late because he got distracted by yet another cat, Yamamoto and Inuoka are having a competition to see who can balance the most items on a sleeping Kenma, Fukunaga’s vibing in the corner eating a banana, Shibayama is the only one actually practicing, and Kuroo and Kai are wayyyyy too deep into a conversation about rubber bands to even notice the creak of the huge gym doors
🐱 That’s when YOU, the new Nekoma manager, decide to make an appearance
🐱 When you walk in, they’re all still so distracted that they don’t even hear you
🐱 Well, until you trip over a sudden rolling ball, sending your body HURTLING forward into the inevitable abyss of the volleyball court
🐱 Everything seems to slow down and you can see everyone stop what they were doing and oh my god they were all looking at you fall and you really wished the ground would open up and swallow you whole because this had to be a record for the worst way to meet new people and you wanted DEATH
🐱 That’s until strong arms and quick reflexes catch you juuuuuust before you hit the ground
🐱 There’s a hitching of breaths, and the court’s silent, and then there’s a holler, and a “WOAH GOOD CATCH YAKU!” from a really tall boy with a bright, somewhat dopey smile
🐱 you’re on your feet before you know it and honey coloured eyes are gazing into yours, complete with a gentle smile that somehow calms your nerves in 2 seconds flat
🐱 “Nice to meet you manager-” he quickly smirks in a way that makes you question how the hell he was so smooth for someone who seemed so argumentative moments ago.
🐱 Before you know it the rest of the team are circling you and throwing their names at you at full speed like it would save their lives. It was like they’d never had a manager before, but they were all CUTE AS HELL so you weren’t complaining
🐱 Your anxiety makes you freeze up a little, and you can only nod in response, straightening yourself up before quietly introducing yourself. Your cheeks are flaming and you don’t know what else to do
🐱 BUT THAT’S WHEN KAI STEPS IN AND SAVES YOU
🐱 He clearly notices your overwhelmed face and somehow manages to calm the room down, apologising to you with a small laugh because “they were all harmless, really- just too excitable for their own good”
——————————————-
🐱 This statement speaks volumes to you after your first few months as the official Nekoma manager™️ because sometimes they just had SO MUCH ENERGY and you had no idea where the hell they got it from
🐱 You love them though, really. And they ADORE you
🐱 You become their little protégée, their baby, their prized possession bc you are so smol and precious and caring and adorable and they all go into PROTECT mode when they see you come into the room
🐱 They still tease you like hell though
🐱 After your embarrassing first interaction with them, you hear the words “Watch you don’t trip (y/n)” e v e r y t i m e there’s something even so much as a brick in front of you
🐱 It’s usually from Kuroo
🐱 They also highkey love to pick you up though cus ur so TINY,,, and by this i mean you and Inuoka become piggyback buddies fr the boy will carry you ANYWHERE so long as u buy him food
🐱 You become close enough with them to become part of their nekoma friend circle.
🐱 This means that you will never experience boredom again
🐱 This also means you’re gonna spend half of the summer soaking wet, because for a team centred around cats, they REALLY love water fights
🐱 It’s all fun and games til kenma has had enough and brings out the garden hose asdfghjkl
🐱 Fukunaga becomes your baby, like you are the team’s baby, but HE. He is your baby. Does things like tug on your sleeve when he needs to show you something important (like a snail he found outside the gym) and your heart melts every time like 🥺🥺🥺🥺
🐱 Kenma falls asleep on you all the time (?) he claims it’s bc you’re comfy but his head is like a BOULDER and your shoulder is DEAD after every long bus journey
🐱 Yamamoto DEFINITELY has a crush on you like no questions. Goes through phases when he can’t speak to you without getting flustered and choked up, and then phases when he just acts SO MUCH COOLER than he is to impress you. It’s highkey endearing though
🐱 You and Yaku are like the parents of lev tbh,,, like good luck trying to keep a giant aimless baby’s attention for more than 15 minutes on a hot day it AIN’T easy but somehow you and Yaku are the only ones who can manage it
🐱 Shibayama trusts you with his LIFE like you two become BEST FRIENDS,,, like deep talks at 2am? Late night phone calls for hours til one of you falls asleep? Random coffee outings? Y’all are inseparable it's so cute
🐱 Kai and kuroo just take you in as their own tbh,, like Kuroo is SUCH an embarrassing dad and Kai makes sure you always get enough food and sleep fr without Kai you dk HOW you’d still be alive
🐱 All your friends are like “Can you talk to Kuroo for me??” and you wanna fly-kick them
🐱 But secretly you feel super cool cus one of the hottest boys in your school walks you to class and hugs you in the hallways and ldamifejiwhey
🐱 Being nekoma’s manager is just like joining a club with the most chaotically lovable boys who would all die for you by the sword if you uttered the word. Your life will be turned UPSIDE DOWN in the best way possible
🐱 And as for nekoma? You were the cutest manager they could ever dream of having- and trust me, they dreamt for a LONG ASS time
#haikyuu!!#hq#nekoma#haikyuu headcanons#haikyuu imagines#kuroo tetsurou#lev haiba#yaku morisuke#kenma kozume#kai nobuyuki#yamamoto taketora#fukunaga shohei#sō inuoka#shibayama yuuki
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Dabi x Hero Reader (4)
Pairing: Dabi x Fem Hero in training, Shinso x Reader (Platonic), Bakugou x Reader (Platonic)
Summary: Mineta is rude and you show him just how scary you can be.
Words: +-3000
Warnings: Feeling hated, mentions of killing, Mineta, people thinking you’re having sex with Shinso, nosy people, singing a song about killing, drugs and death. Best friends with Shinso, friends with Bakugou.
Tags: @wnygirl2012 @chaotic-neutral-logic-sass @immortalwolf18
A/N: Hahah I hate Mineta. I’m so proud of myself like whoooo look at me go. Like and Comment, send me an ask. I love them so much and I tend to continue stories when people actually like them. Thank you for reading. I am still taking requests.
Masterlist
Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3
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Chapter 4 Y/N P.O.V
A knock rang through the room loud and annoying. I felt myself being pulled closer to a body and opened my eyes to see purple locks splayed over my pillow. I couldn’t help but smile, Shinso was so cute. Another knock, faster and louder this time.
“For fuck's sake,” I whispered and untangled myself from Shinso as he groaned. “I’ll be back” he hummed and pulled the blanket to his chest, he wasn’t much of a sleeper so I am glad he got some sleep here. Walking to the door I scratched my head and opened the door yawning. I was not awake enough for this but at the sight of half of my class, I stopped dead in my tracks.
“Y/N” Mina called out smile wide and arms moving around. I hadn’t had time to even fix myself so I was in a big jumper some short shorts and socks. Bed hair out for everyone to see and eyes half-lidded. It was the weekend, why were they at my door.
“Did you have fun last night” Mineta smirked and I could hear a few chuckles. So that’s why they were here, Mineta had most likely told everyone I invited Shinso over. It wasn’t any of their business.
“Hey” I called over my shoulder seeing the male sitting up only to then get up and walk overhand in his hair and the other resting against his waist, shirt lost somewhere in the room. “How was our night,” I asked as he came to look at everyone in the hallway.
“Riveting” he spoke out monotone, eyes narrowed and clearly unimpressed with the situation. Made the two of us, I wasn’t in the slightest bit impressed with these idiots. I was fuming, I wanted to see Dabi.
“Not that I think it’s any of your business who I share my bed with, I’m sure you’d be thrilled to know we just slept cause you know I can have friends” I pointed out and sure the guilty faces of my class fall. Shinso turned around.
“I’m going for a shower” he called and once the door to the shower was closed I turned, eyes narrowed and smile wide. I was close to screaming so loud they went deaf.
“Y/N I’m sorry” I put my hand up with Uraraka spoke though she had walked in, she wasn’t here from the beginning so I couldn’t be too mad. I watched as Bakugou silently walked up.
“I told you, idiots, she wouldn’t be happy” he yelled and Mina was blushing and moving her hands around. I walked out of the room and everyone took a step back. I sighed and nodded my head.
“So Mineta you like starting shit it seems” my head slowly turned to the short pervert standing beside my room door. I moved to crouch down and he swallowed. “If you ever try this stunt again I don’t care if I'm a hero in training I will mount you on a spike and place it in the garden for decoration. Do I make myself clear” I spoke slowly and could see his eyes shaking? He nodded. “I’m glad we are on the same page then, later today we are going to fight, you don’t get a choice. You think you’re so high and mighty, let’s see just how well you fair” he was shaking as I stood and looked to everyone “Now fuck off” I yelled and moved to slam my door as loud as I possibly could.
I was fuming, pacing back and forth in my room in anger as I seethed. Hands shaking as I began to hum to myself and then screamed, not loud but just to get some energy out.
“Feel better” I turned seeing Shinso hair wet and a towel around his waist. I nodded and sighed out. “I want to see Dabi” I whispered and looked down to my hands as he sighed and walked over.
“Why don’t you” my head raised to fast I thought I broke the bone, I’m sure I heard a crack. His face was soft and an eyebrow raised as he shrugged “The crush won’t leave if you don’t see him, you like him. You have for a while, you just hadn’t admitted it” he wasn’t wrong. I didn’t want to admit it and the fact that I did, the feeling was coursing through me.
“I’m going on patrol tomorrow with Midnight, she asked me to come with her. I’ll look around” I looked down but I knew he was smiling from the nod I saw in my line of sight. We both got dressed and made our way down to the common room.
“Y/N” Mineta called out and I swear my mood dropped within a second as Kirishima pushed him forward with an angered and disapproving glance, he wasn’t there this morning. “I’m sorry for what I did” he grit out.
“I don’t care” I spoke, bland and straight forward. Kirishima didn’t move but I could see Bakugou smile from the lounge he was sitting on. “I’m going to tear you limb from limb. I don’t think you should be in this course” the room went silent as Shinso rose an eyebrow. “You're scared of everything and your quirk is mediocre. Shinso should be in here, at least he a decent person. We will fight and if you win you can get whatever you want. I mean anything and if I win. Well, I’ll let you know when I’m done fucking Shinso for the tenth time today. Apparently, that’s all I do” I smiled and then turned to the kitchen and Bakugou laughed and Shinso smiled.
Walking into the Kitchen it was empty but the smell of eggs and bacon indicated that someone had cooked. I moved to the pantry and began getting all the ingredients to make pancakes. Shinso coming to sit at the island in front of me. I got him a drink placing it down in front of him. The eggs didn’t take long to make but it was quiet as Shinso messaged someone and went on his phone. I could hear a few yells from the common room as they played games and talked.
The pancakes were soft and fluffy, stacking them I could see a few people walk past and then stop as I made them “Bakugou” I yelled and within a few seconds, he was walking in. “The stove was messy so I know it’s not you who cooked. I made you pancakes to repay for making me the poison food” I turned and smiled.
I placed the plate in front of him and his eyes were wide “You make some good pancakes. Not as good as me but still up there” he poured maple syrup over the fluffy cakes and took one bite nodding. “You’re cooking me breakfast every morning now” I laughed as he turned “Thanks. What do you want for dinner” he asked standing in the doorway.
“Something with beef” I smiled and he nodded walking out and back to the lounge. I watched as everyone stopped and watched him pass. I smiled with Kirishimas’ eyes practically fell from his face as he begged for one.
“No I got made them, they are mine” many complaints and a few yells I placed a plate in front of Shinso who gladly accepted the treat and got to work with eating them.
“You and Bakugou get along, that’s surprising” Shinso spoke as I leaned against the bench pouring the syrup over the pancakes before cutting into the stack and taking a bite. One of my best makes. “This is amazing,” he smiled and I did too.
“He made me food and we joked about me wanting to die as everything thinks he poisons his food. Now we have a bond. I guess we just make food for each other” I shrugged. I liked it, I thought it was quite cute we did that for each other. A friendly mutual bond, it was better than him hating me.
The meal was passed with light chatter and multiple videos of cats doing various things. I showed a few videos from my phone having to slide across all the notifications. They had gotten less and less but I did see a news article about the club I was at last night. Appears there was a lot of confused and seemingly drunk people on the streets through the night. That was me, I was at fault, the article put it down to a party gone wrong. I deleted the article and went through my messages and other things. Looking up to eat or watch what Shinso was showing on his phone, once we were done we made our way back into my room.
“I have a crush on Kaminari” Shinso blurted out once the door was closed, I dropped my phone on the ground hearing a loud bang as I slowly turned to see him standing there. I was in shock, my eyes were wide “Why are you looking at me like that, you’re the one crushing on a serial killer” he sassed and my eyes grew wide.
“You little shit” running at him full force I came into contact and we both fell to the ground on top of our makeshift bed. It was a quick and fun, I was on top of him my legs over his waist as I pushed his hands to the ground. “Kaminari huh,” I asked my breath quicker.
“Yeah” he sighed and his head fell back, hands pressed to the ground next to his head. He smiled, “We talk a lot, no one knows but we talk. Knew each other before school” his smile was wider and I looked down at him.
“That’s cute” I moved to be laying next to him my leg draped over his body and arm over my stomach. “I can’t believe I like him” I whispered “I mean he likes me too, at least a little” I pointed out turning my head and meeting the purple eyes of my best friend.
“He did come and find you” he nodded and then smiled but this time it was light and innocent “He did save you from the guy as well” I had told Shinso about my night, how I saw him and how I ran away “He kissed you” I flushed and nodded agreeing. He did kiss me, his mouth was so soft and plump at least his top lip was, his bottom lip was rough and textured but I would give anything in the world to kiss him again. “And you ran away” my mind came back to Earth at his words.
“That I did, I felt guilty,” Should I feel guilty, who am I kidding, of course, I should feel guilty. I went out with innocent fun intent and came home having drugged a club and kissed a villain who kills people and is in with the league. Of course, I was in the wrong. “I still do” I offered in the conversation.
“I would too but the heart wants what it wants” he shrugged, for how much he dreamed of being a hero I was surprised he was ok with this whole situation. “I can tell you’re thinking” he whispered and my eyes fell to the blanketed floor draped in his hair.
“Why are you ok with me liking a villain, you want to be a hero so bad and your best friend is doing this,” I asked. I felt so guilty, he wanted to be a hero as much as anyone. It was amazing the drive he had. The late-night workouts and giving him my notes from class so he was always up to date.
“Because I know you don’t want to hurt people Y/N” his hand came to wipe a tear falling from my cheek, I was crying. I hadn’t even realised. More fell as I sat up my leg still over his as I cried. “I wouldn’t care if you dropped out even. You’ve had such a terrible start and I know how bad it is on your mental health. I don’t hate you and I never will, you don’t want to hurt people. I know that” he smiled and I brought him into my arms as I continued to cry.
He was my best friend.
- The day was passing nicely and with every passing moment it came closer to my ‘fight’ with Mineta and I regretted challenging him, I was going to win. When the time came I walked from the dorms with Shinso followed by a group of my peers. I was talking calmly as we made our way into the training building that we were now allowed in after getting our license: Todoroki and Bakugou being an exception.
“Any thoughts,” Shinso asked his hand lightly grazing past my own as we walked as close to each other as possible. I had been thinking about it, how easy it’ll be. I could practically feel the stress coming from Mineta.
“I’m going to humiliate him” I smiled turning my head and then letting my head fall back to view the people behind me, he was shaking, eyes wide and hands fidgeting. “I don’t like being made fun of” I finished and turned back. He nodded a response.
I wasn’t going to do anything bad, I was going to do what I said. A fight with each other with our quirks, he didn’t deserve to be in here. He had no hero attributes, he was a pervert, he was scared, he cared more for his own needs than the needs of others. It was disgusting, Shinso deserved to be here. Shinsos’ quirk could save people, he could get information with just words. He was a real hero.
Walking into the building I moved to stretch my arms as everyone moved out of the way, to the sides of the building. “Regret your decisions” I called out my hand placed lazily on my hip. He was athletic, I had seen him at the sports festival and he was decently smart.
“No” he smiled his hands raising shaking, drool falling from his lips “I’m going to win to get whatever I want” his eyes were shaking and a scowl came to my face, he was disgusting. Heroes should not act like this but then again heroes shouldn’t kiss villains. I think my issue was better than his.
A few more words and then we began, he was running. He was quick but I was so pissed off at the music as I dodged one of his balls, I didn’t so much as want to be touched by them. I wanted to scare him, so a scary song.
“People say that I’ve got a bad temper” I sang voice low and croaky as he stopped in his tracks, eyes moving to a more feared look, wide and breathing heavy. “Hit you with my car and change the fender” I could see the reactions of the class as I walked forward and he fell to the ground looking up at me. Pushing fear into him his hands shook and breathing sped up “Decapitate your head then put your fingers in the blender” I put my hand up moving my fingers individually as he stared at them before smirking. “My mind is sick as fuck please do not enter” I croaked out bending down in front of him slowly. I was so angry this morning, the way he easily told everyone and the fact people listened. To think I could have some privacy in this place, I already had the world hating me, why did I need my class added to the list. “People say that I got a bad temper” I smiled rolling my eyes like it was a fake issue. “Keep on playin we gon get your ass dismembered” my finger came to run along my neck leaving a red line from my nail, it didn’t hurt but his shaking got worse, he was trying to get away but his body wouldn’t let him. “Did I kill, I really can’t remember” I made a confused look as I shook my head like it was a nothing thing. I loved bringing in his fear, it tasted delicious. I had been craving more emotions since last night. “I’ve been drugged up out of my mind, since last December” I did feel drugged, emotions flowing through the air. “He pissed me off, but I didn’t mean to kill him” I smiled my hand coming close to his face as he shook his head in utter terror.
I stopped there the song falling into nothing as he sat there holding his knees to his chest shaking. “Y/N” someone called out and I put my hand up for them to pause. I wanted to speak, I wanted to speak my mind.
“After the week I’ve had your first intention is to make it worse,” I asked and he couldn’t even meet my eyes without tears welling up in his eyes. “My quirk is called Siren, I have all the powers of a Siren. I can change emotions and push them into a person, by pushing fear you heard the words as though they were straightly directed at you and not just from a song. Next time you try and get into someone else's business really think hard” I said slowly, he nodded frantically and I sighed out. Within a few seconds it wore off, I didn’t make it strong. He was back to normal but his eyes met my own and mine narrowed. “I won. I don’t want anything from you, maybe just been a decent person” I stood to my full height and walked through my class “Bakugou” I called out seeing the smirking blonde come into my view “I would like some noodles for lunch” I came to a smiling Shinso and we walked out.
“For that, I’ll make you whatever you want” he smiled throwing an arm around my shoulders “You gotta give me that song” I laughed holding Shinso close to my body as we let the building.
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#dabi x reader#dabi is a todoroki#reader x dabi#dabi imagine#villain x reader#ashtray x reader#ashtray#LOV#league of villains#x reader#fem reader#reader insert#bnha#bnha fanfiction#bnha fanfic#mha fanfic#mha fanfiction#mha#boku no hero academia#boku no hero x reader#my hero academia#my hero academia x reader#dabi scenarios#dabi#touya todoroki#hero x villain#anime x rea#anime#bakugou#shinso
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Hello, Cupid's Pick sounds fun! If it's not too much trouble, I'd like to request one for Jojo's Bizarre Adventure (I'd prefer Part 5 since I'm most familiar with it, but only if it's okay with you!)
I'm a very open minded person, kind of quiet but I get talkative the more I know you. I'm the chaotic friend who's usually down to do anything with you. You could literally talk about anything (except math), and I would listen to you attentively if you sound excited enough. I do swing from lazy to hyper and energetic. There's very few people I genuinely open up to, but I dearly love them so god help anyone who insults them because I can and will fight them (nothing can stop this 4'11" gremlin!!!). My humor is either dirty innuendos or sarcasm. I am also the kind of person who can cry just cause someone else is crying. For hobbies, I'm very fond of cooking, singing, and playing video games. I absolutely love sweets and I am very much a cat person. I hate bugs with every fiber of my being though, I will definitely run out of the room like my life depends on it. An ideal date would probably be relaxing at home or going somewhere quiet to hang out and talk.
Ahdkakjda wait, I'm so sorry, I got so excited I misread your Cupid's Pick post... if it's alright, could I choose Melone, Ghiaccio, and Risotto as my top 3 picks? (I was the anon who asked for Part 5 of Jojo specifically...)
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Cupid’s Pick for your match made in heaven is...
...Melone!
I personally think Melone would only be open to a relationship if he believes the other person is a perfect match for him (and his genes)! And guess what? He believes you are and so does Cupid!
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I'm a very open minded person...
Necessary for their line of job, but definitely a plus for Melone due to his…tendencies and personality and interests. So I feel like he would be very into open minded people (like yourself) because that just means more acceptance and more things to try out ;)
I mean he may brush off or ignore other people’s disgust, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t want to be accepted too uwu so your open mindedness is one of the big reasons you’d catch his heart!
If you have limits, he will push them from time to time, but reign him in and he’ll be more than willing to behave (with a price ;3)
...kind of quiet but I get talkative the more I know you. + You could literally talk about anything (except math), and I would listen to you attentively if you sound excited enough.
Melone strikes me as someone who talks moderately in general (he just talks to himself a lot), but he will talk more to the people he’s close to/comfortable with, and his excitement when he realizes you’re actually listening to him will shoot up and up and up (like his rate of talking).
He knows you tend to zone out when he’s talking about math related stuff, so that won’t come up often with him, but it still will sometimes because he probably thinks your expression is just Di MoLtO~🥴
He also loves collecting data/information on you, so whatever you talk about to him, he’s gonna be typing it down simultaneously!! So not only does he listen, he remembers (and has like 50 sub-folders on the stuff you say lol). This is mainly because he wants a more cohesive file on you. Like I said, he already believes you’re practically the perfect match for him with all the information he has on hand already, but his appetite for more information about you drives him to do this because it’ll just affirm for him that ‘ok wow this person really is my match made in genetic heaven’.
Ghia’s excitement comes in the form of rage and it happens often, so while he loves that you’re listening to him, I think he would almost never show you that he appreciates it. Also, if you’re talkative when he’s stressed or angry, he will yell at you to shut up. Ris would be straight forward (tells you that he’s not in the mood) and Melone would say stuff like “Not now. Later.” (but he doesn’t sound as gruff as Ris).
Ris is the same way with the quiet to talkative thing (in my HC at least), so getting past that initial stage would be hard as hell with him. Imo Melone would be the easiest to get past that stage, and Ghia…depends? If you keep pissing him off though (bc yk…tsundere with anger issues lol), he’ll be the hardest to get to a comfortable stage.
There's very few people I genuinely open up to, but I dearly love them so god help anyone who insults them because I can and will fight them (nothing can stop this 4'11" gremlin!!!).
All of them would appreciate this one way or another, but Melone more so because you’re fighting…for him. Him who’s always touted as gross or perverted or disgusting by the majority. Him who never fights in a confrontational manner because he isn’t comfortable with that and prefers long range tactics (satisfactory but seeing u fight face to face for him just hits different YK?). And it means so much more to him than you’ll ever know.
He’ll also be standing behind you, cheering u on with the biggest smile on his face too :’) also would jeer & taunt ur opponent LOL
I'm the chaotic friend who's usually down to do anything with you.
I HC Ris as having a routine set of things he enjoys doing and it’s on permanent rotation (I’m not saying he won’t go out of his comfort zone, but he knows what he like and if he doesn’t like something, it’s hard to change his mind), whereas with Ghia I HC him as only having 2 interests – cars (more specifically the type of car he drives) and knowing facts (+ disputing and ranting about them). Ris would indulge in some chaos once in a blue moon, but I feel like him & Ghia are set and happy with their current interests.
Melone however would be the most open in terms of what he’s willing to do as long as his safety is guaranteed or if the activity does not involve him getting hurt. Like stealing a yacht or hacking ur annoying neighbour’s computer system LOL
Because you bring that chaos, Melone would be the most fit with you. I know you’re probably like “Huh? Ain’t Ghia chaotic too?”, or “Wouldn’t Ris handle chaoticness the best?”, but chaos (Ghia’s) feeding into chaos (yours) might burn the both of you out, and Ris already deals with chaos 24/7 and he just wants to relax imo. Melone though, looks the most flexible and can probably match up with you the best because of that since he deals with Ghia and the rest on the regular without looking like he’s Tired™️ lol
I do swing from lazy to hyper and energetic.
Like I just mentioned, Melone most likely deals with Ghia’s energy on the regular and he looked chill with the other members too, so he (and Ris as well since yk…he’s the one overseeing everyone in LS) would adapt to your moods the best.
Ghia…I feel like because he has such a short fuse AND is a tsundere (well, at least that’s what I get from his vibe), he would not deal well with your energy if it’s higher up there. He might blow several fuses if the situation and your mood and his mood doesn’t align properly. I also think if he happens on your lazy mood, he would just leave you alone and go do his own thing.
My humor is either dirty innuendos or sarcasm.
Melone is technically a pervert, so when you make dirty innuendos, he’ll absolutely eat it up like a wet ass pussy.
I feel like he definitely prefers that over sarcasm, unless your sarcasm is aimed at someone else (especially if it’s someone he doesn’t like). He’ll probably just ignore you if you’re sarcastic to him lol, but Ghia would absolutely take it too far too quick. Ris enjoys the sarcasm more than the dirty innuendos I feel, but because he’s also your boss, you have to know where the exact boundaries are when y’all are in a professional setting. He’s not quite forgiving if he feels undermined or disrespected. But if Ris is in the mood, he’d dirty innuendo you back, but if he’s not then he’d either brush you off or pretend you didn’t just say that lol. Overall, kinda dry with your humour bc in my head his humour brand is Dry too LOL
I am also the kind of person who can cry just cause someone else is crying.
Ghia would scold you or make you feel like an idiot because of that (he might think it’s a liiiiittle cute, but the chances of him telling you that is like 0.0001% lmao). He’s prideful as hell too so…. But he might also find it annoying or ridiculous (depending on the situation). 0/10
Ris would hand you a tissue and maybe offer his embrace. He thinks it’s a little odd, but it’s not something he would give most of his attention to after you explain it to him. 4/10
Melone would coo at you. Would tease you with it too. He’d also love your tears. Something about you crying…kinda turns him on…maybe. Overall, he’d be the one who doesn’t mind it the most and likes it the most too. 100% wouldn’t make u feel stupid or weird about it, that’s for sure. 8/10
For hobbies, I'm very fond of cooking, singing, and playing video games.
Cooking - Ghia’s taste is Picky, so he won’t eat everything you cook and will 100% complain if it’s something he doesn’t like smh. Ris enjoys the domesticity when you cook with him, but he’s 90% in charge bc he likes certain dishes a certain way. He would also give you constructive criticism like you’re on masterchef or some shit😭😂. Melone would eat it all up. No complaints. On the pan, on the plate, on the cutleries, on your body. Man don’t give a fuck. Put your cum in it too and he’ll gobble that shit up SO quick😭 Overall, would eat anything you give him because he’s chill in that aspect bc I see him as kind of a trash eater? 😂
Singing - Ris would listen and dish out a compliment once in awhile, Melone would verbally appreciate it the most (and also secretly record it and save it amongst the 2k other files he has on your singing lmao), and Ghia in all his tsundere-ness would ask you to can it (he really doesn’t want u to shut up but you don’t actually know that lmao).
Video games - Risotto would never LMAO. If he sees you playing games, he’s just gonna go about his day or even turn around lmao. Ghia probably thinks its childish. Melone would indulge in this hobby of yours the most. Probably buy some for you or even make hentai games just for u💓
I hate bugs with every fiber of my being though, I will definitely run out of the room like my life depends on it.
Ris is the best candidate for this because he would kill it for you, Ghia would walk out, and Melone would scream and run with u LMAO
An ideal date would probably be relaxing at home or going somewhere quiet to hang out and talk.
Melone would try to push you to go out & try different kinds of dates, which is fun in its own, and a good balance for compromise between the two of you. But then again, it’s not like he’s constantly going out lol, so when you go on your ideal dates with him, he’s reminded that intimate quality time like these are so important too (and it secretly becomes his favourite types of dates as well because more time = more info on his lovely baby)
Risotto would match up with this the best, but that would also mean these kinds of dates (chill, lowkey & personal) will make up majority of your dates. And he (imo) is quite fond of chill lowkey routine type dates, so...unless you’re the homebody introverted type, I don’t think Ris would match the best.
Ghia’s ideal date is probably travelling? And 60% involves his car and other cars & 40% involves trivia & debates (whether it’s a game between you two or at a bar against other teams). No other interests LOL
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All in all, Melone x anon 🤷🏻♀️
I hope you enjoyed this 💜
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Trick-or-treating (Madderton fic)
A lovely anon prompted me with halloween prompt #15, “Dad!AU (take the kids trick-or-treating, etc”, with Richard specifically in mind. Thank you! This is long as hell, ~1800 words, and so fluffy. Tbh I never pictured myself writing the boys as Dads, but this was really fun and I kind of loved doing it lol, so if you like it I’d be totally willing to do it again. Thanks for reading!
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The text from Taron came through at 2:45, while Richard was in the middle of a meeting and trying to stop his mind from wandering to what he wanted to eat.
Gonna be a long day, love. Can you get the kids ready tonight on your own? I’ll be home before you leave, promise.
I don’t know what they’re supposed to look like, T. That was all you.
It’s foolproof, Dickie, I promise. Costume on, a little glitter on her cheeks and she’s good to go. Even easier with Jude. Stick him in the pumpkin costume and zip it up. What are you, afraid? ;)
Not afraid, just don’t want to screw it up. I’ve got it, no problem...we’ll see you tonight, love.
You could never screw anything up. Love you. x
Richard smiled a little. Taron was making it sound much less complicated than he knew it would be, and trying to give Richard a boost of confidence. He knew that whatever T had going on at work, it had to be huge, because he would never miss an opportunity to get Zoey and Jude ready to go trick-or-treating.
He had always assumed that Taron would be a Christmas kind of guy. The lights, the snow, the presents, it had Taron written all over it. So Richard was shocked to find out along the way that Taron liked Christmas just fine, but he loved Halloween.
Before the kids, it had been all about spider webs and fake witches, apple cider all month long and couples costumes that made Richard die a little inside. Halloween was when Taron could be as outlandish as he wanted, and he always dragged Richard along for the ride, introverted as he was.
After the kids were born, he focused most of his Halloween energy on them, finding their costumes, perfecting them, taking them all to every Halloween-themed event he could find throughout the month of October. It was darling, really, and it made Richard love him that much more.
And it made him nervous to try to get their kids ready for that evening.
He supposed Taron was right, Jude’s costume was self-explanatory. Jude was almost two, and stubborn, and had insisted on picking out his own costume, something that drove Taron nuts. He’d picked out the simplest costume on the rack, a smiling round pumpkin costume that required no makeup, glitter or additional wiring. Just a zipper. Richard had watched Taron’s face fall when Jude had insisted on the pumpkin.
“Don’t you want something like this?” Taron had asked, holding up a pirate costume. Richard had been able to see the cogs twisting in his mind, figuring out some way to turn it into an intricately designed zombie pirate or something.
“No, this!” Jude had been emphatic. Taron had sighed with resign.
Zoey, on the other hand, was four, dramatic, and very into fairies. Richard had watched for weeks as the two of them had bent their heads together, designing the perfect fairy costume down to the last detail. They’d then spent the better part of a week deciding what kind of makeup would go best with her outfit, trying different shades and glitter. They’d only just declared everything perfect the weekend prior, and as Richard remembered the grin on both his daughter’s face and his husband’s, he was terrified that he’d mess it up.
Still, he had to try.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
When Richard came home, the nanny smiled at him and dumped Jude into his arms. “Zoey’s coloring in the playroom. They’ve both had dinner. Have fun tonight!” He nodded at her as she left, and looked down at his son, who had snuggled into him instinctively, and headed into the playroom.
Zoey was parked at their coloring table, scribbling ferociously on a pad of paper. Her dark brown curls tumbled down to her shoulders, and he marveled at the light in her blue eyes. Their night would be chaotic, he knew: he had to pull a miracle out of his arse in the next twenty minutes with regards to Zoey’s costume; Taron was likely to come home in the next hour like a madman and start critiquing everything he’d done; by 7:45 his children would both be full of sugar and far, far from their normal bedtime. Yes, he knew their night would be chaotic, but for the moment, he could watch his daughter color, hold his son, and soak up the miracle that was his life.
He kissed the crown of Jude’s head, into the same soft brown fluff that belonged to Taron when he let his hair grow out, and rocked him back and forth. Zoey looked up and saw him there, and before he knew it, she was crashing into his legs with a hug.
“Daddy!”
“Hiya, princess,” he said, setting Jude down so he could briefly gather both of his children into his arms. “Did you have a good day?”
“Yes, we--”
Jude stepped in front of his sister and stared deep into Richard’s eyes. “Candy.”
Richard laughed and Zoey tossed him a glare. “Yes, buddy, we’re going to get candy tonight, I promise.”
“Candy now, Daddy,” Jude said, a serious look on his face.
“Soon. First we have to get you two ready!” Richard said brightly, standing up.
“We have to wait for Daddy,” Zoey said. “He has to do my makeup.”
Richard bit his lip slightly and looked at his daughter. “He has to work a little late tonight, angel, so I’m going to get you ready, but he’ll be here before we go trick-or-treating, I promise.”
Zoey’s jaw dropped. “You can’t do it! You don’t know what to do!”
“I can do it, honey, I promise.”
Zoey sighed dramatically, and in the back of Richard’s mind he feared for her teenage years, not for the first time.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“No, Daddy, what are you doing?”
Richard sighed. Well, Taron had been right about one thing: getting Jude ready was a cinch. His son was running around the living room, bouncing off the walls in his pumpkin costume, screaming in the distance about candy. He had no concept of his increased circumference, and had so far knocked over (and broken) an ashtray and a vase. It didn’t matter to Richard, though; he was ready to go. He’d stuck the kid in, zipped him up, and sent him on his way.
Zoey, however, had been testing him since the moment they’d started getting ready. He’d gotten a run in two pairs of shimmery green tights, and put her skirt on backwards. He’d cursed Taron over and over again as he’d struggled to wrestle his daughter into the costume, all while she wailed like a wet cat when he did anything wrong. The costume had 12,000 pieces, it seemed like, which would have been all well and good if Taron had been putting her into it, as he’d originally planned. The skirt was made of dark green tulle and the bodice was a lighter green. It had the most ornate and intricate flower crown that Richard could remember seeing (which he’d jammed onto her head backwards, by the way) and completely impractical ballet slippers.
She was darling, his girl, but he was out of his element.
He was now holding the makeup pallet she’d shoved into his hands, his fingers pinched tightly around the eyeshadow brush as he tried to smear the right color onto her eyelids. It was dark, and heavy, and she looked like a tiny clown. He’d tried to put the glitter on subtly as she’d instructed him- “Just a little, Daddy, no, not that much!”-and failed miserably. He’d put far too much blush on her cheeks.
“I...I think that’s it,” he said nervously, and she pranced over to the mirror with a smile on her face. He watched as it dropped off, however, when she looked at herself.
“I know, angel, I’m sorry, I tried my best,” he said earnestly. They were interrupted by the sound of the front door slamming, and Zoey raced off. Richard followed sheepishly.
“Oh, my days, would you look at you!” he heard Taron say. Richard stood in the doorway and watched, Zoey gathered up in Taron’s arms. He couldn’t help but smile.
“Daddy did my makeup and he didn’t do it right!” she said.
“Oh, he certainly...tried, though, didn’t he? It’s a look, eh?” Taron kissed her cheek, then looked up and smiled at Richard, who ambled over. “You’ve got to blend the eyeshadow, love, or else she just looks like a...well, like this,” Taron said, setting Zoey back on the floor.
“I have no idea what that means, and no desire to. You’re a bloody saidst for forcing me to do this. Hello,” he said, kissing him briefly.
“I know, I’m sorry,” Taron said, the sheepish smile that Richard couldn’t resist playing on his lips. “And would you look at this! We’ve got a little pumpkin destroying the living room!” Taron said, scooping up Jude and kissing him all over his face.
“Alright, let’s go!” Richard said, gathering up the bags they’d bought for the kids to hold their loot in.
“Candy!” Jude yelled, holding tightly onto Taron’s hand, Zoey onto Richard’s as they made their way out the door.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
By the time they’d gotten the kids home, gotten them out of their costumes and into pajamas, wiped the clown makeup from Zoey’s face, and wrestled two sugar-laced children into their beds a hundred times, both Taron and Richard were beat. Richard padded into their bedroom where Taron was laying in bed, wearing nothing but his boxers and scrolling through his phone.
“I know you love this holiday, but by God I’m glad it only comes once a year,” Richard said, throwing himself into bed beside Taron and curling up next to him. “What are ya looking at?”
Taron started laughing, giggles coming from his belly as he stared at his phone. “Look at her!” he said, turning his phone to Richard and showing him one of the many photos he’d taken of Jude and Zoey that evening. Her blush practically glowed in the dark.
“Hey!” Richard said, fake-annoyed. “You let me go in blind, love, I had no idea what to do.”
“I know, I know. You did a wonderful job.” Taron kissed Richard, sliding his hand around the back of Richard’s neck and pressing his forehead to his. “You’re amazing.”
Richard sighed contentedly, burrowing closer to Taron, soaking in his body heat. “Listen. I love you, I love our kids, I love this life more than anything.”
“Mmm,” Taron said sleepily, closing his eyes.
“But I swear, if you ever leave me in charge of Halloween again, I’m out of here,” Richard said, a teasing grin on his face as he joined Taron in closing his eyes.
#my fic#richard madden fanfiction#taron egerton fanfiction#fluff fluff fluff!!!#dad!richard#dad!taron#halloween prompts
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thunder crush | thor odinson
prologue: her (Solaris) powers are basically absorbed from solar energy, and well... and he is the god of thunder.
warning: just angst
words: 2.1K
"That was the worst mission of my life. It was torture!" Sam exclaims, catching Tony's attention.
"What did I miss?" Tony asks.
"Fortunately, nothing. The sweetest God of Thunder and Y/N discussed the whole mission, they just keep fighting, they look like two kids."
At the same instant Solaris enters the room with her arms crossed while Thor says something probably imitating her.
"What is there with you two?" Banner asks.
"Do not ever send me on a mission with that idiot again, he's five years old!" Y/N exclaims irritably.
"Look, the arrogant lady, full of herself."
"Excuse me?" she widens her eyes, offended.
"Hey, hey, miss sunshine and weather boy, let's take it easy..." Y/N moves away and rolls her eyes, Thor does the same. "What happened?"
"He ruined everything, as usual!"
"I ruined it? Who was the human who thought she would deal with what she does not know? Oh right, it was not me."
"I'm not the one with the diva complex here! Thor is like that, like a diva, he needs audience and applause to live!"
"At least I know what I am doing." Thor says with acid in his voice.
Y/N’s brows drew together, and her eyes began to glow with intense gold, she was losing control.
"That's enough, you sweetheart will rest, the day was full. And you, Point Break, how about a snack?"
"Stark."
"Okay, okay, no nicknames."
Later in the training room Y/N looked like she would explode with such anger. She didn't hate Thor, but lately he has annoyed her more than usual. And yes, he seemed to be acting like a stupid brat child and that was unacceptable, at least while they were on an important mission. The girl fired a bolt of energy at a target so hard it ended up causing it to catch fire. She had to run to put out the fire before the fire alarm did not start ringing.
"He really pissed you off, didn't he?" Y/N turned to the side and saw Natasha standing on the doorframe.
"He always does that. Ever."
"Men..." She came over and took a knife from the table. "Have you ever thought that maybe he did it on purpose?" And she threw the knife, hitting the middle of the target.
"Of course, he probably hates me. Or thinks he's better than me." she shrugs and Natasha smiles.
"Not in that way" She throws another knife, hitting another target.
"What do you mean?"
"Don't you remember how Thor looked at you when Stark gave the New Year's party? Champagne, intense glares, I think he even became jealous when you danced with Bruce, he even said that Thor was angry with him for a few days." She laughed. "It seems to me that the God of Thunder has a crush on you."
"What?" Y/N laughed, choking on her own laughter. "This is ridiculous."
"Perhaps." Nat shrugs and approaches Y/N, who is still in shock with the information she didn’t know. "But try to pay attention to how much he tries to impress you."
"But is not he like that? Ever wanting to show everyone how powerful he is?"
"Usually yes, but it's different with you."
"I find this almost improbable; Thor is like the Tinker Bell, he needs attention to survive."
"Well, that's true."
Later in the complex, everyone was busy with their own stuff while Y/N was in the kitchen looking for something in the refrigerator to eat. She found a box of strawberries and sat down on one of the benches. As soon as she bit the first strawberry, no one but Thor walked into the kitchen. He stared at her for a second before opening the refrigerator and grabbing a beer. Y/N looked away and continued eating her strawberries.
"Did you miss something here?" she asked without even looking at him.
In fact, Thor was only admiring her. He was delighted as a woman like her could be extremely gracious even doing a simple thing like eating strawberries. But he would not let go of his deepest thoughts, meanwhile, they were still in this game of cat and mouse.
"Thank God, no."
"Then stop staring at me."
"I am not staring at you, I am-"
"Staring."
Thor grunts, annoyed and slammed his fist into the refrigerator, leaving the mark of his fingers.
"What is your problem?" Y/N rises, irritated again.
"What is my problem? What is your problem lady?"
"You're my problem!"
"Then I think you should just get out of here!"
She felt her body bubble with anger. Her gaze focused on the beer bottle in Thor's hands and her mind began to work. When he realized, the liquid inside the bottle was bubbling hot and when he felt the glass was about to explode, Thor threw it into the sink.
"Are you crazy?"
"I can't stand you, I can't even look at you! Why don't you go back to your home, to your world where you can brag about how powerful you feel, huh? Don't you ever tire of ruining everything?"
Thor paused for a second. She went too far. When she realized, maybe it was too late. Lightning and thunder glowed outside the window. And there she realized that she had touched a wound of Thor that she should never have touched.
The day passed and no one dared to leave the complex. It was a monstrous storm outside, so everyone was forced to spend the rest of the day indoors. Y/N knew what was happening and who was the reason for the apocalyptic storm outside. And to make matters worse, the sun was gone, the source of her power was hidden behind clouds and more clouds loaded with rain. And if she had to defend himself against anything, it would be useless.
"Has anyone seen Thor?" Y/N asked Natasha, Tony, and Steve who were in the command room.
"No... But should we?" Natasha asked.
"He disappeared. We fought and-" Tony automatically placed his hands over his face, completely irritated. "I know, I'm sorry... I'm looking for him to apologize."
"Bucky saw him leave about half an hour ago." Steve said confused. "Where would he go?"
"I have no idea, but I'll go look for it." She lifted the zipper of her coat and turned to go after Thor.
"Is it a storm out there, and what if you need your powers?"
"Then hope I don't."
Then she picked up one of the available cars and drove in various places in search of a completely annoying demigod wandering the streets. Then she was prowling one of the streets near a park she saw him. A strong man sitting alone on a small wooden bench while the rain drenched his face and his body. Y/N parked and ran toward Thor. The rain was cold and strong, the heavy drops falling under her head and body.
"Thor? She called, but he didn't move. "What are you doing here alone?"
"Go away."
"I-I'm sorry for what you said earlier."
"You do not. And maybe you are right, I always mess up. I lost my brother, my father, almost everything I loved, I lost. And it is my fault."
She caught her breath and her lips parted to say something, but all she felt was the rain sweeping her face. Thor lifted his face, seeing her there in front of him, completely soaked and static.
"You're not to blame for any of these things, things happen for some reason, at least I believe it, and I know you've gone to great lengths to protect all people."
"It was not enough. It will never be."
"Thor..."
"Why don't you leave? You are wasting your time here. I could even hurt you too."
"Because I'm sorry, okay? I'm sorry for being so childish and stupid sometimes, and look I'm sorry, but you have to admit that you are too. We're always fighting for no reason and I don't understand why. But I know you're capable of a lot, you've always done good things here on Earth..." She takes a deep breath, folding her arms in the cold. "Plus, you made a pretty storm here and I'm literally without my powers, so I'd appreciate it if you just did not kill me." Y/N let out a shy smile, secretly worried that Thor would really lose control and make matters worse.
But anyway, he stood up, his hair damp and dripping down his nose. The height difference was considerably large, Y/N had to raise her face slightly to see him. Thor stared softly at her, with a solid look, the deep blue and bright. The icy wind hit Y/N’S face and it made her lips tighten in discomfort.
"I would never hurt you, love."
Her eyes widened, trying to understand what he had said. Thor as soon as he realized, he coughed to disguise the embarrassment, meanwhile, she laughed at everything.
"What did you just call me?"
"What? Anything."
"I heard it... Huh?" She teased him, laughing at his embarrassment.
"Is it over now?" She apologized, stopping laughing "Great."
Thor moved closer to her, making her feel cold, which was a rarity. No one had ever made her feel what Thor was doing now.
It was a bittersweet mixture, a cold in her belly laden with floating butterflies and such a positive energy carried in her body that she thought it would explode. Thor touched Y/N’s face, making her feel his callous and smooth touch on her face. The rain didn't stop, it was a chaotic scene all around them, but for a moment everything seemed to disappear.
"What are you doing?"
But Thor did not answer. He wrapped his hands around her face and pulled her closer. She became aware of the situation when he kissed her. It was a sloppy kiss, wet and full of desire. She for a second thought "what the hell is he doing?" But it was good. Thor's hand came down and involuntarily tightened the flesh around Y/N’s waist. She sank into the arms of the God of Thunder. And he, it felt as if all that electricity was accelerating his chest and his heart could explode. She pulled Thor's short hair as she kissed him, only to have him closer to her despite how tall he was. The tight muscles in Thor's arms involved Y/N’s in an almost awkward hug, but there she felt something unique: comfort.
When they parted the kiss, the stares were confused. Y/N could not help it for a long time and smiled, almost openly at Thor, who still expected a reaction from the woman in front of him.
"Even when you kiss me, you have to make a dramatic scenario, don’t you?" She laughed, mentioning the rain and lightning that still fell on the whole city. Thor laughed and pulled back to kiss her, this time more willingly. This time he really made it all more dramatic, because the kiss was with such desire and precision that it made her run out of breath. Her hands touched his abdomen over the wet jacket Thor was wearing, fingering it until she reached the top of his pants.
"Could you-" Y/N broke off the kiss and jerked her head toward the sky.
"Oh, sure, I forgot."
He held her in his arms as he almost magically made the rain cease and slowly the sky took on its natural color, a warm blue, covered by only a few clouds.
"Now everything is perfect."
"Of course this is, after all, you are the one kissing me."
Y/N rolled her eyes and pushed him lightly, even though she knew he would not move an inch as it was literally a wall of pure muscle.
"Can we go back now?" She looked up, watching Thor's expression change.
"I think it's better."
"Can I ask you something before we go back to the compound?"
"Of course, my love. Whatever you want."
"Can we leave it a secret? The guys were going to mock on us forever for that."
"I think it is better this way, I enjoy secrets." Thor stepped closer, sealing his lips with Y/N’s.
"Oh, my God... I just kissed Tinkerbell!"
They returned to the car, Thor visibly confused without understanding what she was talking about.
"I do not know who this Tinker is... Tinkerbell guy? But I bet it must be someone powerful... Right?"
"Oh yeah, you're so right..."
She laughed as she watched Thor get into the car. They both arrived at the compound with a bit of fear because they didn’t want anyone to find out what had happened. But the moment they stepped into the room, Tony and Natasha paused, staring at the two of them, completely drenched and suspicious.
"Look, Ken and Barbie are back! How was the reconciliation?"
"Tony..." Y/N rolled her eyes and walked toward the hall, but Thor was followed, completely bewildered.
"Y/N, who is this Barbie and Ken people? Why is Stark calling us these names? Y/N!"
#thor imagines#thor odinson imagines#thor odinson x reader#thor odinson x you#thor odinson x y/n#thor fanfics#thor x reader#thor x you#thor x y/n#my writings#my fanfics#my writing#thor#thor odinson#god of thunder
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Kichirou’s interview for @futurecarrie‘s DRSE 2!
1.) What is the most important thing to them? (meaning a person or thing specifically i.e. friends/family)
Himself. He can’t count on anything to stay except himself, so he tries to not bond with people or things. That also means that he won’t end up hurting anyone because they got caught in his bad luck. It’s just easier to be a lone wolf.
(his family is actually incredibly important to him, and that is exactly why he cuts them off; so he won’t hurt them. More on that later in the interview)
2.) Do they have any deep, dark secrets? What are they? Is their biggest secret the fact they killed someone, or is it more like they wet the bed until they were 8?
His personality is mostly just a facade. He tries to seem like he doesn’t care, and hates everyone, but he does care. A lot too. He just doesn’t wanna hurt anyone and doesn’t wanna hurt himself, by getting attached to something he could lose. He keeps this a secret from everyone, and he has a hard time admitting it to himself, too.
Other than that, he can’t swim. He has tried to learn it, but he still just slowly sinks.
3.) If something bad happened (i.e. their mum was killed), are they more likely to cry or get angry?
Angry. He stopped crying a long time ago, now he mostly bottle it up, and eventually let it all out in a burst of blinding rage. When he is angry, he makes even rasher decisions than normally.
4.) What’s one of their favourite generic items (meaning something that isn’t special to them in any way, but if someone gave it them they’d be very happy)?
Rings. He loves rings, and always wears some! And sour candy too, he prefers it over anything sweet, really.
5.) What is one of their least favourite generic items (again meaning something that isn’t special/unique to them (like a chocolate bar or something))?
Fridge magnets. Small boxes. What do you do with them? They just take up space, and he can’t ever find any good use for them.
6.) What’s their relationship like with their parents?
His parents loves him, no matter what. But like everyone else in his life, he shuts them out. He does love them, he truly does, but he is too scared to realize that. Because if he does, eventually they will either a. see how horrible he really is, and how skewed his morals often can be, or b. his bad luck will appear in the form of hurting them. He always does this if he cares about someone. Ignore them, avoid them, anything to let them at least be safe from him. It’s easier if they dislike him because he left, than if they dislike him for thing that he can’t change about himself.
7.) Do they have any fans (if their talent permits them to have fans)? Do they like said fans?
He doesn’t have any, but if he had, he wouldn’t like it. Too much attention. Besides, he knows how some fans can put their idol on a pedestal, and he doesn’t belong on one.
8.) Do they have any siblings? How do they feel about said siblings?
Nope, only child. When he was still small, he badly wanted a sibling, but not any longer.
9.) What three words would they use to describe themselves?
Clever, brave, chaotic. He know that he is both clever and brave, and would use both to describe himself to others. The chaotic is more of a warning, if people don’t know him. He tries to tell people what they can expect. But there will always be that little inside voice, saying lonely as the third word. He would never tell others that though.
10.) What three words would others use to describe them?
Strange is a popular one, that he has gotten used to hearing whispers of. wherever he goes. Lucky or unlucky are also what people quickly notice about him. He also often leaves an impression of being slightly scary, or just intimidating.
11.) Any fears?
He has a fear of birds, and especially hates it when they fly up, or towards him. He doesn’t mind if they’re just walking around or flying far away, though he will still keep an eye out for them. Other than that, flying. He has never flown before, but he is sure that if he did, his luck could very well make the plane crash.
12.) If they were offered 1,000,000 of their currency to do something immoral, would they do it?
Without a second thought. He is used to doing “wrong” things all the time anyways, and of course it would bring bad luck, but he likes the thrill. Besides his money situation is... always changing from extreme wealth to nearly nothing. It’s one of the classics for his luck to change.
13.) What’s their stance on religion?
He doesn’t follow any religion. Kichirou also don’t believe that there’s any gods or higher beings. Except he have always felt like his luck was a... ‘thing’? it has the ability to judge him, so it must be some kind of thing, even if he doesn’t really know what that would be.
14.) What’s their stance on the supernatural?
Again, he don’t believe in that kind of stuff, except for the constant feeling that his luck might be more that just luck, but an actual thing that can judge what is good and bad. Of course he would never tell anyone about this, but keep his ‘The supernatural is a bunch of nonsense’ attitude.
15.) If they had one day left to live, what would they do?
Constantly switching between freezing up and just thinking about death and his life, not being able to do anything out of sheer panic, and running around trying to do everything he wants to do before dying. He would want to contact his parents, but also he wouldn’t wanna hurt them, and reconnecting a day before dying would be cruel. He would definitely be very split.
16.) What makes the earth turn according to them: Money or love (or is it because when the earth was a gas cloud it started to spin and hasn’t quite grown out of that phase yet) ?
According to Kichirou, the world goes around because of money. He knows that it is super important, but he doesn’t care much for it. himself. He wished that love would make the earth turn, but he just doesn’t think that it’s really true.
17.) Knowledge, power or relationships: what’s the most important?
Knowledge. Power is boring, and so unlike everything he has ever experienced, with so little control in his life. And he has proved relationships to be unnecessary, living his life with few relationships. But knowledge will always be important to him, and he values it greatly.
18.) Do they like animals? What’s their favourite?
He do like animals. Sheeps are oddly cute and his favourite too. He just can’t explain why, but their fluffy wool is adorable. Fluffy big dogs are good too. He also had a Norwegian Forest cat, when he was younger, that he loved to bits. It ran away at one point though. He also once saved a cat from a tree.
19.) Any weird talents (besides their ultimate/shsl) that they’re secretly proud of (like rapping for example)?
Parkour. He loves the thrill from jumping and running fast between buildings. It’s also a great way to let out anger and energy.
20.) Tell me a random story about them!
This one is recent, actually from the day when he won the lottery to become SHSL Lucky Student.
Kichirou had a weak moment, after having an especially rough day, and decided to ignore everything he had been doing for years... to visit his parents. It was a very quick and sudden choice, but he finally showed up at their doorstep after not having seen them in several years. Needless to say, his poor mother nearly fainted from seeing her dear son again. He got invited in, and though it was kind of awkward talking with his parents again, he enjoyed it. Nothing bad happened either! Almost regretting his temporary weakness on his way home, he got a phone call from Hope’s Peak, telling him, that he had won the spot as Lucky Student. What incredible good luck! What he thought was just a selfish wish to see his parents again, turned out to make them incredibly happy, and reward him with good luck.
21.) Do they have any illnesses or disabilities?
He doesn’t have anything lasting, but he tends to have some illnesses that comes and goes, some more serious than others. Nothing ever really stays for long though, it’s another luck-aftereffect. He also doesn’t have any disabilities.
22.) Left handed or right handed?
Right handed. you could say he got lucky with that one huh
23.) How would they react to being locked up in a school with no foreseeable time of leaving?
Blame his luck, but try to find a way out. He would not be the type to just give up and accept his fate, but instead use his wits to find clues as to what is going on.
24.) Will they miss their old high school? Why?
Not at all. There isn’t really any amazing memories related to it, so instead Kichirou is happy to turn a page and start over. He hopes that the new school will be better, and that he will be happier and more accepted there.
25.) Do they like the outdoors? If so, what’s their favourite outdoor activity and any memories linked to that?
He do like being outside. Walks are nice, especially for thinking, which he does a lot of, but his favourite is doing parkour. Forgetting all of those damn thoughts and just living in the moment. Sometimes he needs to think, and sometimes he needs to not think at all. Depends on his mood.
26.) How important is their talent to them? Does it not mean much or would they die for it?
It’s not really easy to think about life without his luck. Of course, not much would be different if he just lost the title as Lucky Student, but his luck altogether? He would be a completely different person altogether, not having to constant think about actions and what would happen to him, and everyone around him. So of course it means a ton to him, but maybe... he would be happier without it. The daring and brave side of him would miss it, but he would also be able to be much more social and live a normal life.
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I am on the seventh dungeon, but my prompt is what happens if the Phantom Thieves don't quite take the bait on targeting who they are supposed to? What if they just double down on entering palaces for anyone that seems appropriate, entering the palaces of people they judge bad as rapidly as they can to help as many people as they can, instead of leaving month+ gaps.
I really like this one, it spurred many ideas in me!
I expect that there is more in this universe but eh, this is what we’ve got so far. An evening in Mementos, in a world where stop only ever means just for a second.
(Spoilers through early October)
Every other Saturday is Mementos night. It’s nicely consistent, something they can mark their calendars by. Consistency is key for everything they’re trying to accomplish here.
“Targets tonight?” Queen asks the table at large. It is large, especially with Noir here, but the diner is the closest place to Shibuya Station’s Mementos entrance where they can congregate without attracting too much attention for loitering. They never come here as a group, except on Mementos nights. The waitress knows them and their favorite back booth by sight. It makes Mona twitchy, which means Joker is twitchy, but that’s okay. A tense Joker is as still and quiet as a cat just before the pounce. It’s hard to read the hyperfocus in his posture unless you really know him.
“Three new targets from Mishima,” Skull reports. “Plus the one from last time whose name turned out to be wrong.”
“The blackmailer?” Joker asks. “Futaba?”
“Haru got her credit card information from the flower shop,” Oracle reports, her glasses glinting from the reflected glow of her tablet screen. “I traced the fake name back to an address rented under another fake name, and followed that back a bunch more levels to a real passport. Her real name’s Michiko Sakai.”
Nods all around. “Good job,” Joker says. “Anyone else?”
They rarely go into Mementos with fewer than half a dozen targets, these days. It feels like a waste. There are too many power-hungry, corrupt, and greedy people around. If they’re going to change all of Tokyo, they can’t exactly do it one individual at a time.
“I have one,” Queen says. “Our friend at the supply shop has been having some difficulties with a couple of old acquaintances. He could use our help.”
Queen is always the most circumspect, when they have these discussions here. She always positions herself near the end of the booth and within shin-kicking distance of Skull, just in case. Joker, who sits on the opposite side of the booth with clear lines of sight to both entrances and every possible line of approach, appreciates it.
“Uh, what kind of difficulties?” asks Skull. “And…what kind of old acquaintances?”
Queen waits for Joker’s nod–the next table over is preoccupied with a small child wailing over a spilled glass of milk, and the waitress has just stepped outside of easy eavesdropping range, so he gives it–and says, “Yakuza. Akimitsu Tsuda. He’s been threatening our friend. We’ll have problems if we don’t take care of this.”
“Is that a good enough reason?” Panther asks. "Just because we’ll have problems if we don’t?”
Joker worries about Panther, sometimes. Someday she’s going to fight enough battles, kill enough Shadows, that she stops asking that question. She’s not the only one who asks, but she brings it up most often. Their unanimous decision-making won’t be worth much if that finally happens.
If it does. It hasn’t yet. They’re still warriors of justice, for now.
“He’s rejected even the Yakuza’s version of a code of honor, and he’s suggested he’ll come after both our friend and his son,” Queen says. “He’s definitely killed before, and he doesn’t appear to regret it.”
“Good enough for me,” says Skull. “Anybody else? C’mon, somebody’s got to have something good.”
“Our reporter friend is experiencing difficulties, but nothing that presents a target as of yet,” Fox says. Joker is going to need to check in on that soon. Fox has the most time and freedom to hang around in a bar in Shinjuku with a mostly-drunken news hound, but he misses things, sometimes. It’s not an ideal setup, but somebody needs to cultivate Ohya. With the number of new palaces they have to explore, her articles are just too valuable.
If Joker had all the time in the world, he’d get to know her himself. If he had that much time, he wouldn’t need a team in the first place, and he’d have nothing to spend it on.
“That’s five,” says Queen. “A light evening.”
“Six,” Noir says. “I know how to beat that gamer.”
They all look at her. Mona purrs in satisfaction.
“Told you she could do it,” he says. Joker hadn’t been so sure about setting their newest member on the trail of that Gamer King–but it had been a test as much as it was meant to be a distraction from her father’s looming change of heart. He needed to see just what Noir could do on her own terms. She’s come through with flying colors. He’d hoped she would.
“That’s a full load, then,” Skull says in satisfaction. “We ready?”
Joker looks around the table of thieves–lean, fierce, hungry. Ready. Well-honed weapons thirsty for the next rush.
“Let’s go,” he says.
.
There are plenty of reasons for going to Mementos. Time is too precious not to multi-task, always, always, always. Joker beckons Queen to take Mona’s front passenger seat and heads his way down.
The first hour or so in Mementos, while most of Tokyo is still awake, is always predictable. Shadows mill back and forth along set paths and go down easily when Mona hits them, spilling out forms and faces that Joker’s already worn and known from the inside out. They spend it gliding through Kaitul, picking up treasure along the way and flexing their muscles for the warm-up.
“Learn anything interesting from Hifumi this week?” Joker asks. Tactics. He will never have time to learn to be half the strategist Queen is. That’s why he has her.
“She’s been focused on teaching me defensive plays lately,” Queen murmurs. The shadow up ahead trundles past without glancing in their direction, golden when Joker blinks his eyes, then back to shapeless lumbering darkness. “I’m pretty sure I can find us an opening to escape even if we’re surrounded.”
Useful. Very useful. It’s hard to understand how a few nights of studying under a shogi master could produce a tactic that practical, but Queen’s brain is a marvel and Joker never takes it for granted.
“Can you teach me?” he asks.
Mementos is perfectly, predictably unpredictable, especially this early in the night. Every tunnel twists and splits in new chaotic pathways every time they’re here, and every tunnel is always the same. It’s practically safe, more or less. It’s the perfect time to learn something new.
“Get us caught a few times tonight, and we’ll see,” Queen says. Her smile glints in the dim, green light of the twisted subway tunnel.
Joker considers the dim shapes just around the corner, at the edge of the sweep of Mona’s eye-beams, and lifts his head. “Get ready,” he says, loudly enough to cut through the banter of the back seat. “Fox. Skull.”
“Wait,” Mona says, as he spins the wheel and guns the engine, aiming just to the right of the lumbering shadow. They should pass by close enough to lean out the window and stroke it, if they wanted. Definitely near enough to draw attention. “Joker, what are you doing–”
“It’s spotted us!” Oracle warns. “It’s going to–”
Wham. The catbus keels over at the blow and Joker springs free, knife in hand, Arahabaki just behind his eyes and ready to go. Towering shapes spin up out of the gloom all around them, spitting fire and lightning and throwing Fox to his knees before they even have the chance to move. It’s fine. He can take far, far worse. Having time to prepare would defeat the purpose of training to be caught off guard, after all.
“You’re surrounded! This looks bad!” Oracle’s voice rings clear. Joker glances over at Queen.
“Leave it to me,” she says. “And guard!”
.
There are three shadows ahead of them, clustered, drowsing. They flicker different colors when Joker lets his eyes go unfocused and peers at them through thief-sight, red one moment, blue the next. No telling how strong any of them are–or will be, on and off, if they change mid-fight.
Late night, as Tokyo drops bit by bit off to sleep, is when Mementos really comes into its own. It’s a labyrinth of thoughts and possibilities when the real world is mostly awake. When Tokyo is dreaming? Anything at all could happen next.
Oracle’s in the front seat–seeing out the front window doesn’t help her navigate Mementos any better, but it puts her that much closer to Joker’s attention, lets him respond that split-second quicker when she hisses, “Now, go, now!”
A moment later the tunnel to their right wavers and melts away like soft wet ice cream, sludging down around the tracks on the floor. It’ll stick to Mona’s wheels like tar if they go too slow, and if they aren’t all the way through by the time the wall forms back up they’re in trouble, but Joker’s foot is already on the gas pedal and they shoot forward with a squeal and a squish of tires in the muck. The walls around them waver like heat-mirages in midsummer, iridescent with flickers of emerald and blue and gold against the Akzeriyyuth violet. Nothing in Mementos stays stable for long, but if they pick just the right moment–
“There it is!” Oracle points triumphantly ahead and to the left without even looking. “The next target.”
“Panther,” Joker says, and then considers the rest of his party. Fox and Skull are still knitting skin and bone back together from a few fights ago, Oracle’s passive restorative powers not quite as fast or clean as actually digging into their bags of medicine or their healers’ skills. Noir is starting to tire and pretending not to. Queen’s got plenty of energy still, but the night’s only just begun, and there’s no sense tapping her out yet. “Fox, use a Life Stone. You’re up. Mona too.”
“Yesss.” The cat-bus all but purrs around them. “Let’s get ‘em!”
In the other world, Takeshi Saito is a clean-cut police detective with an easy smile, one he tends to flash to burglary victims before suggesting they make a donation to his wallet if they want him to take their case seriously. In this world his smile splits wide, wider, spilling his insides out in a great ribbon of shadow that wends its way up tall and thin, Makami’s familiar face on a starving wolf slavering for their blood.
“Mona, Garula,” Joker orders, pulls Unicorn’s silvery-white bolts of lightning up in his own mind, and reaches for his mask.
It’s a swift, brutal fight. They’re stronger than Saito’s shadow, probably have been for months, but it’s quick enough to freeze Panther solid and nearly shatter her with a nuclear explosion that even rocks Joker back on his feet. Fox dives in, katana flashing, and slices it down before Mona even has Panther back up again, and Joker stands back to throw bolt after bolt of lightning, sending the shadow crumbling to its knees.
Saito’s shadow melts back into his human face, panting on his knees. Joker takes a step forward, then another one, gun at the ready.
“I’m sorry,” the shadow cries. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, it’s just that the world and the system are so fucked already, I didn’t think it mattered if I took advantage of it.” He’s too pathetic to even want to kill. Human-form shadows get like that at the end, and Joker is grateful. They’re not murderers. Even now, they’re not murderers, and that matters.
“You should tell us about that,” Panther says, more sympathy in her voice than Joker could muster. Her health is low but she’s standing on her own two feet, stepping forward to offer Saito an understanding ear. “Who hurt you so badly you thought this was the only way to be?”
“I…I don’t…” Saito’s shadow shakes its head and rubs at its face. “So many people…”
“Who’s the worst?” Panther asks. “Not just to you. Who’s the worst person you know?”
“The district chief,” Saito says instantly. “He knew everything I was doing! He runs the whole precinct for himself, all he wants are convictions, he’ll even make us arrest the victims–”
“A name,” Joker says. “Give us a name.”
“Jirou Kazumi,” the shadow says. “Please, I don’t want to die.”
“Quit your job and atone for your crimes, then,” Joker orders. “Now go!”
The shadow dissolves into smoke. Joker snatches the kernel of Treasure out of the billowing black with one gloved hand, glances at it disinterestedly before he tucks it in a pocket. Freeze Boost. Not entirely useless, but not what they came here for.
“Well that was useful,” Mona says cheerfully. “Nice going with the information, Panther.”
“Ugh, I just want to climb into the back seat and take a nap,” Panther says, stretching her arms out and cracking her neck to the side. “But yeah, we’ll put Kazumi on our list of names to check this week.”
“Someone as powerful as a district police chief may even have a palace of his own,” Fox suggests, audibly pleased by the prospect. “Finally, another one.”
“What do you mean ‘finally’? We haven’t even finished Fujimada,” Oracle points out. The others are behind her, ready with high fives and congratulatory pats on the shoulder. Mona settles from two legs to four wheels with a satisfied beep.
“We are mere days from sending that calling card. It won’t do to be without a new palace for long,” Fox muses. “I wonder what it will be this time.”
“How can you start thinking about that when we haven’t even met the guy?” Skull shoves Fox up and into the bus. Joker hides a smile with long practice as he settles in behind the wheel.
“Two more targets to go,” Oracle proclaims in satisfaction. “C’mon, Mona, let’s hit the road.”
.
Time warps oddly in Mementos, when they stay for long enough. Their phones don’t help, blinking bright NO SERVICE notices whenever they try to use anything more than the Meta-Nav app, but Joker has a watch he scavenged from a shadow two months ago that hasn’t broken yet.
By 2 AM it never matters what path they’re on. Tiny Pixies that spit Ziodyne and dodge bullets spring up next to enormous, winding golden dragons along Adyesach just as Qimranut, and the walls flicker color and substance at every glance. Enemies appear and disappear mid-fight, or change form and abilities just when they’re inches from destruction and need to be defeated all over again. It only gets worse as the team’s eyes start to blur in exhaustion, and weariness drags their reflexes slower and slower.
It’s far too late to leave now. Out in the real world the trains from Shibuya aren’t running any more, and there’s no telling what sort of hell they’d have to pay if any of them were caught sneaking home at this hour. Better to stay put through the night and slip out in twos and threes in time for the 5:00 early train, fall into bed and sleep Sunday morning away as best as they can manage.
It used to be that they could barely last a couple of hours down on the twisting rail paths of Mementos, but they’ve gotten stronger since then. They only need a twenty-minute break. They sit clustered close together in the island of yellow light at a rest floor on some path or another, wailing winds whipping through the tunnels outside, dozing against shoulders. Panther pours still-hot coffee out of a canteen and offers it around.
“Not as good as Joker’s,” she says, but it’s warm and full of caffeine and that’s all that really matters here in the dark.
Fox is snoring gently with Mona a dark-furred lump in his lap, Oracle curled up beside him. Queen and Noir are tucked up against each other like pressing together can hold off the darkness. Joker nudges Skull’s ankle with his toe and passes the coffee to the side.
“Gah, hate that stuff,” Skull complains, but he takes the cup and downs it in three big gulps. “Shouldn’t we be saving it for this week’s Palaces?”
Panther shrugs. “I can always call Kawakami and have her make more,” she says. “Not that I like blackmailing our teacher into helping us out, but…”
“She’s helpful,” Joker says. Then, quietly, not loud enough to wake the others from any naps they might be managing–“How’ve you been?”
“Who, me?” Skull elbows him in the ribs, gently, where Joker is still a little bruised and healing. “I’m fine, man. Busy week, but hey, aren’t they all?”
It’s true enough. Joker’s barely seen Skull since last Saturday’s successful foray against Ryuunosuke Kuroda’s treasure, outside of the two days they spent slogging through the hot and sticky morass of Hina Fujimada’s jungle palace. There’s always a lot of work to be done, and never enough time to do it.
“You run into Takeishi or Nakaoka again?” Joker keeps the question casual, something that could be brushed aside, but his tone is serious enough. Skull stares down at his boots.
“Yamauchi’s fucking with them,” he says. “I know he is, and they’re all going to end up hurt or worse servin’ his ego, but I can’t…” He shakes his head. “Damnit, I know we could find him down here easy, too. No way Yamauchi doesn’t have a shadow we could beat the shit out of.”
“But we can’t,” Panther says, leaning forward, all worry and sympathy in her voice. “There’s too much attention on the school already. First Kamoshida, then Kobayakawa…”
‘I know, okay?” Skull shoots back. “I know already. And we can’t solve every problem in the world, those guys are going to have to work some shit out for themselves. I just hate knowing exactly what they’re getting themselves into and not being able to do anything about it. They’re–they used to be my teammates, you know?”
“It’s not your fault,” Joker says. Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Queen’s foot twitch in something only a trained observer could possibly recognize as empathy. “If there’s anything we can do for them, we’ll do it.”
“I know,” Ryuji sighs, exhausted and defeated. For just a few moments he’s more boy than skull mask, more person than Phantom.
It’s important to remind the team of that, once in a while–Skull himself and all the half-dozing eavesdroppers who’ve surely been listening in for the past five minutes. Being Phantom Thieves is less of a career and more of an entire lifestyle. There’s never much room for any of their more human selves underneath.
“C’mon,” Ann says, patting Ryuji companionably on the knee. “Cheer up. Let’s wake up the others and go beat up monsters for cash.”
“Hell yeah,” Ryuji says with just a little more brightness. He lifts his head and that’s it, he’s Skull again, mask in place and ready to go. “C’mon, guys, shove some coffee down your throats and let’s hit it.”
.
Joker has his own tradition of slipping into the Velvet Room for the last half hour or so of Mementos night, while the others slowly trickle away one by one, avoiding the curious eyes of station attendants and curious police as they go. His Personas are always stronger after a night’s work, and he always seems to pick a couple of old ones back up along the way.
Today Orthrus and Lamia and Rakshasa latched on and clung to him, desperate to save their own lives, which was foolish of them. All Joker’s personas die sooner or later. He’s already got all three in his Compendium–now it’s just a question of how they die, sacrificed for items or turned into power for Queen Mab, for Scathach, for weak, unlevelled Hecatoncheires.
If Akira Kurusu ever had a true self, he sent it to the guillotine to fuse into a Kelpie six months ago. The Joker can’t be precious about protecting parts of his own personality.
“Wow, inmate. That’s dark.” Caroline chuckles approvingly, a sick nasty grin on her face as she and her sister head to the gallows. Joker doesn’t point out that feeding Daisojou the power it couldn’t get when he first fused it is really more about boosting light spells. It’s really all just sides of the same coin, after all.
It’s important not to get too cynical. Mona reminds him of that, once in a while. Too much cynicism, despair at the doomed and failing nature of humanity, is its own kind of distortion. Not everybody they’ve changed so far has thought their warped world represented reality as it justly ought to be–only reality as it actually is.
“Have you finished?” Justine asks after a while, as calmly as though she hasn’t fried and hanged and sliced her way through Joker’s selves one after another. He slips back from Velvet Room blue to Mementos shadows-and-red with a silent nod of thanks.
The light’s just coming up, filtering into the warped turnstile where Oracle is waiting for him cross-legged with her laptop, Mona by her side. It’s never bright down here, but morning always seems to make it a little less dark.
Palaces all blur together after a while. For Joker it started happening months ago, somewhere in between the flying bank run by Junya Kaneshiro, mob boss, and the high-security mafia compound holding the heart of Ichiro Shimizu, banker. They tend to repeat, after a while. There’s always another would-be king in their own castle, another cathedral built to honor some awful adult’s worst delusions of grandeur.
Last week they stole a tattered paperback copy of The Tale of Genji from the Heian-era Imperial Palace inside the heart and courtroom of a vicious, prideful judge. Their current target looks out at the dance floor of the largest nightclub in Roppongi and sees a dark, steamy rainforest full of hungry tigers and venomous beasts ready to devour each other at any moment. Next week they’ll check out Jirou Kazumi, for whatever that tip is worth, and maybe his world will turn out to be a fortress or a cave or a cattle ranch. They see the world through so many people’s eyes, one by one.
Mementos is easier somehow. Cleaner, maybe. It’s everyone’s palace and that means it’s nobody’s, a sliver of chaos and dreams, not anybody’s full world. It’s a nightmare, that’s all, and that means it dissolves with the dawn.
“Are you done zoning out at nothing?” Oracle asks. “Can we go home now?”
“Let’s.” He offers her a hand up from the floor and she scrambles to her feet, computer safely disappearing into whatever bag Oracle keeps it in when she’s not working. The others have all gone, as usual on a Sunday morning.
Sojiro tends to open the cafe later on Sundays. If they hop the next train to Yongen-Jaya, Joker should be able to help Oracle slip through her bedroom window and make it back to his own bed before Sojiro is there to notice he hasn’t been home. They’ll probably catch hell someday, but it hasn’t happened yet.
It’s October already, a chill in the early-morning air when they slip from Mementos back to reality. Has it really been six months already, since everything began?
Six more months until Akira Kurusu is supposed to finish out his probation and go back home to the middle of nowhere, a quiet, biddable boy who’ll have learned his lesson one way or another. Six more months to finish changing the world. They’d better get moving.
“Look into Kazumi this afternoon,” he murmurs. The train is nearly empty at this hour, nobody there awake enough to question the two teenagers slumped tiredly in their seats or the cat riding on their lap. “We’ll have a strategy meeting for the week tonight.”
‘Got it.” Oracle nods sharply. “We’ve got work to do.”
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They say good things come in small packages.
And rightfully so, I cannot argue against that logic. Good things do come in small packages – my university acceptance letters did, my engagement ring (hehe!), and the countless books I ordered off of Amazon.
Good things do come in small packages.
But, there is one thing in my life that came in a giant package. Or rather, a cute black leather carry-on bag.
My baby girl, my drool-bag, my giant-ass English mastiff, Miesha!
This is a story about how a tiny bundle of fur slobbered her way into my life (and into my heart) like a force of nature. This is the story about how one sooky giant wrecked havoc on my house, destroying everything in her line of sight. This is the story about how after months of training, and destruction, and mischief, a large dog helped change my world.
It’s the story about how my English mastiff Miehsa helps me battle my mental illness.
Miesha Wilson-Thomas was born on November 20th, 2015 in Nova Scotia to a litter of ten other fur balls that were already the size of a small Chihuahuas after birth. It wouldn’t be until Christmas Day that I learned that this little wrinkly tribble (Star Trek anyone?) would officially be joining our family.
But Miesha came into my life during difficult circumstances. I had spent December in the hospital because I was extremely sick. I was due to have surgery in a few weeks and I was worried about bringing – in all sense of the word – a baby into the house.
But she was a gift from my fiancé, and after seeing the joy light up in his eyes, how could I say no? Even though, let’s be honest, he wanted her more than I did, but I wanted a dog. I was just worried about the timing.
But as the next week few weeks wore on, we planned our trip to Nova Scotia to bring home our quickly growing baby and I was getting excited. I was starting to feel a bit better and was released from the hospital until my surgery. Since I was on sick leave, I was looking forward to the chaos of being a stay-at-home fur momma.
And really, how could I say no after the breeders texted us pictures like this?
“She’s gonna have attitude,” I said to my fiancé one day when we went through the recent pictures that were sent to us. “I can see it in her eyes. She’s gonna have a big personality.”
“That’s just more to love,” Zack waved me off, melting over the photos.
But we were still excited. We made countless trips to stores stocking up and preparing for her arrival. The living room had morphed into a giant dog play room. Arty, our first cat, seemed curious and a bit alarmed by the recent additions to the household. By the look on is face, he knew something big was coming, but he had no idea just how big the surprise would be.
And the week before we were due to go to Nova Scotia, I got sick and ended up in the hospital again. To say we were stressed was an understatement. Doctors were talking about airlifting me to St.John’s and talks about doing mini surgeries before my big one were being discussed – and spending eight days drugged up on morphine and painkillers, I began to worry. I was stoned out of my trees, but I was extremely concered about bringing Miesha home while I was sick. Zack scrambled to change plane tickets as the breeders refused to hold her for an extra two days, and I watched the torture on his face as he had to choose between leaving me in the hospital by myself or giving up our girl.
There wasn’t a choice. I told him to get on the plane.
“It’s not like I can go anywhere,” I joked, shaking the hand that had my IV jabbed in it, smiling giddy besides being in a world of pain.
So Zack got on the plane.
And a few hours later, he texted me a picture of our baby – rather our toddler (because she was already over twelve pounds)! Miesha was finally on her way home. And despite being pissed and upset that I was stuck in a hospital bed, I was happy she was finally on her way to Newfoundland to where she belonged.
I just had to focus on getting better, trying to get my gallbladder in check so I could get out of that stinking hospital and be home in my own bed with my baby mastiff. I spent the next few days in the hospital, and really I don’t remember much of what happened. But through the hazy memories, Zack did bring her to the hospital – hiding her in a carry-on and covering her with his jacket so no one would be suspicious.
I spent ten minutes with her, getting teary-eyed over the shivering wrinkly lump that sat next to me on my bed, her chocolate eyes looking at me as if to say, “Who the hell are you?”
Yup, no doubt about it. She was gonna be just like her mudder.
But a few days later, I was released and finally got to be home with my fur baby, finally understanding all the chaos Zack had explained to me during his visits.
“She snores. A lot.”
Great! I thought to myself, shooting Zack a look of dismay. Another snoring body in the house. Just what I needed.
But even though I was still sick and recovering myself, I got to spent a lot of time cuddling on the couch with my new baby girl. She loved armpit snuggles, and I soon learned she slept a lot. A dog after my own, lazy heart.
And as the weeks wore on and I started to feel better, I fell into my mother role pretty easy, even though the first day Zack left me at home, alone, I was terrified that I would suck at this.
“What if I accidentally kill her?” I looked at Zack worried, staring down at the wrinkly lump in my lap, who stared back at me with worried eyes. Really Dad? You’re gonna leave me alone with her?
“How will you kill her? It’s not like you can roll over a squish her to death.” Zack kissed my forehead and left for work.
“Ok, princess!” I smiled down at Miesha, “We can do this!” I cheered myself on, even though she seemed less that thrilled. She had imprinted on Zack first and I was the new kid on the block. We had some work to do.
She slept for the first three hours of official mommy duty.
Jeez. This seems to easy.
And boy was a right!
The next few months was a constant battle of understanding what twitches of eyebrows meant, and recognizing the signs for poops and pees. She was a chewer and I fretted that she would never grow out of this terrible habit. Our old green couch had fallen victim the first three weeks home and I wondered if I would ever be able to buy brand new furniture.
But it was exciting to be home and spending every day with her, watching her grow, learning her quirks, and training her myself. Zack had dubbed me “Mean Mommy” within no time and I became the disciplinary in the household.
It was controlled chaos. My couch lost its stuffing, she chewed through at least three full packs of toilet paper, she was gaining five pounds every week and hadn’t quite figured out just how much strength she really had – which resulted in several split lips on my behalf.
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I cried a lot, I got mad a lot, but I enjoyed watching her explore her newfound world (even though she refused to go beyond the perimeter of the driveway). She loved Cheez Whiz and peanut butter, and I soon learned I was going to have a counter surfer on my hands. Nothing was safe, including a beautiful cake I baked one afternoon, which suspiciously had a huge chunk missing from it when I left it unattended for less than two minutes.
I was right. She had personality…and attitude…and way too much spite in her bones.
But damn did she look like a cute little baby moose when she got a bath!
Miesha had drooled her way into my heart and despite all the chaos and yelling, I was glad she was a part of my life. She kept me from being bored and loved to sleep in my lap while I wrote or read. She was Dad’s girl but she was Mom’s sook. Dad was easy to give into treat begging but she loved to cuddle.
She gave me purpose.
And then April came.
Nothing could prepare me for the bad depressive episode I sank into because of my PTSD. Within a matter of days, I had crashed and starting losing control over my anxiety. The flashbacks came back. The night terrors resurfaced. I was filled with intense anger and frustration that had no rhyme or reason. And then the terrible thoughts came back. The worthlessness broke my wavering confidence and I thought about death. The suicidal thoughts were back and worse than before.
I wanted to die.
And there was no amount of dog cuddles or wet kisses in the world that could snap me out of it.
I was consumed with my dark thoughts. I never wanted to leave my bed and I had barely any energy to shower, let alone make effort to doing anything to keep my mind preoccupied. I was on a self-destructive path that I was quickly losing control over. I was pushing Zack away. I refused to speak to my family. I cut off all ties with my friends. I refused to answer my phone. I wanted to disappear. I wanted the world to swallow me up whole and put me out of my misery.
It wasn’t until one day that I was sat in the tub, the water having gone cold two hours before, that I stared at my pills on the counter and thought: I could end this. I could make this all go away. I could make all the pain and hurt go away forever.
And somewhere in those twisted and tormenting thoughts, my last bit of sanity broke through.
“Run, Amanda. You need to run.”
Miesha was curled up against the frame of the bathroom door when I pulled open the door and she looked at me with curious eyes.
“Come on, girl. Let’s go for a run.”
And we ran. We ran until my lungs were burning and I had a stitch in my left side and I wanted to vomit. We ran until I finally exhausted my chaotic mind into a numbed sense of being.
And a few hours later as I sat on the couch, Miesha (who was over sixty pounds by now) trying to squish her way into my lap, I made a decision.
April 2016. You can see how exhausted and tired I was.
I made a decision to keep fighting.
This was just another battle with my PTSD. This was just another tough stalemate that I had lost. I came out bruised and battered, but the war wasn’t over.
The was would never be over, but I knew I couldn’t raise my white flag yet. There was so much more I needed to do.
So I made the decision to keep fighting.
The next day I went through the bathroom and tossed every spare razor in my house and got rid of anything (including painkillers left over from my surgery) that could give my suicidal thoughts intention. The first step to fighting my PTSD? Protect myself. And maybe it seemed strange or unreasonable, but I “Amanda-proofed” the house.
The next step? Get active. I was barely back to work since I was still recovering from surgery so I had a lot of idle time on my hands. With my mind on a precipice, I had to physically force myself to keep my thoughts from going haywire.
And that’s where Miesha came in.
If it was one thing we had in common, it was we both hated being stationary. Moving forward and keeping busy helped exhausted us into lazy couch potatoes. It was time to get to work. We went hiking, we went to the dog park, we lounged around in the city’s park. We did anything and everything to keep us out of the house, even if it meant going for long drives or sharing timbits from Tim Hortons.
And as spring bloomed into summer, and the days grew hotter, and the evenings grew longer, I was finally feeling better – I was feeling like myself again. Miesha was growing herself – she was still putting on weight, but she was slowly morphing into an adult dog. She was becoming tamer and friendly. She was my partner in crime, in everything we did, and even though she was outgrowing my lap, she was overflowing my heart.
She was helping me get better. She was making me stronger. And above all else, she was protecting me. And without question, she stayed by my side at all times, keeping a close eye on me – nudging my hand to get my attention to remind me to not stay idle too long. She kept a close eye on the both of us and she took her role seriously.
“Mudder. I’m sick of selfies! GAWD!”
But not everything was serious. Sometimes her attitude got the better of her and we had moments of indifference. She was still a puppy and had the devil in her. She had her defiant moments and had soon expressed her distaste for selfies.
And we had our quiet moments, too. Sometimes there were days the dark thoughts did win. Sometimes there were moments we needed to stop and just keep breathing – to remember that it was just as bad day. Bad days had their times, but they weren’t in abundance anymore. The dark thoughts were slowly retreating back from whence they came.
And on those bad days, I had Miesha. I had my guard dog and protector. She would nudge my arm with her drooly snout and snap me out of the hard moments. And on the days I didn’t have the strength to venture outside or to go for a run, “Not today, girlie. Not today.” Miesha would simply wiggle her way into my lap as best she could and squish me with her hundred-plus pound body and remind me that it was ok – to remind me she was there whether I needed to cry into her droopy ears or just needed a mastiff hug.
She would always be there with endless love in spades and countless kisses to share.
Looking back, it’s funny how life has a way of reminding us that there is still good out there. I had battle PTSD for five years before Miesha came into my life. I thought I had it all figured out. I knew my illness like the back of my hand. I had fought the dark thoughts and had resources on hand. I thought I knew everything I needed when it came to throwing all my efforts at recovery – therapy, journal keeping, staying active, writing, support from loved ones.
What more did I need?
But they say the best things come in giant-ass packages.
Because what is a dog anyway? Man’s best friend. A faithful companion. A cuddle buddy. A lump of fur that creates chaos in our organized lives. We get dogs for pets, but they end up being so much more than that. They become family.
And if you’re really lucky, they become your protector.
And looking back, I can’t say for certain that Miesha did save my life that day. Was she in the right place at the right time? Most definitely, but the day I contemplated swallowing a bottle of pills, she (along with everyone else I loved) was the furthest thing from my mind.
So maybe I saved myself in that moment, but Miesha guided me through the following days. She proved to me something that I truly needed to understand – that I was needed. She relied on me for everything. And at the end of the day, I needed her too.
Because she’s family and family doesn’t let their love ones give up without a fight.
So maybe there are days she’s a little weird.
Sometimes there are days she’s an attention seeker.
And other times, she truly disregards any sense of privacy or personal space.
“What?”
But she’s a good big sister to Arty and Daeny (even though Arty begs to differ most days).
She understands that being lazy isn’t necessarily a bad thing (but a necessity).
Because life is not just about the big things, but enjoy the small moments. And even though Miesha could draw a crowd with her beauty and loving personality, she knew the best moments were the quiet moments, and we had lots of those days.
Because Miesha has taught me many things in less than her two years of life.
Maybe she turned my world upside down. And maybe she has truly tested the limit of my patience (and made me question my decision to have children). She has created chaos and stolen one too many chicken bones from the kitchen garbage. There are days her slobber and drool has caused my OCD tendencies to skyrocket out of control and other days drained my bank account with expensive vet bills.
There are times she’s so lazy my anxious mind contemplates if she’s sick and I’m misreading the signs. There are times she has almost broken my arm by trying to chase other dogs on our walks and there were times she convinced me she had squished Daney to death when she body slammed her, and has kept me up countless nights with her loud snoring just outside our bedroom door.
And there are times when I get angry and she refuses to cuddle me that I question if she even likes me at all and there are times when she’s snoring away of my office floor that I wonder if she loves her home. And on countless occasions she has made be gag when I hace to clean up vomit or wipe boogers from her nose or when her farts are so loud she scares herself with the sound.
Miesha is a lot of things and has done a lot of things. She has scared off strangers and drawn the attention of one too many dogs at the dog park. She sometimes instigates fights with the cats or gets on my last nerve, but when she sits next to me, panting away, I truly understand just how much I am thankful for the 130 pound dog that crashed into my life like a bat out of hell.
She’s got a big personality and a no-nonsense attitude just like me. She’s sometimes bad and impy but truly makes up for it in kisses and drool. Above all else, she loves and protects us with her big body and her large heart. Because she protects me from the bad days and relishes in the good days with me too. She’s a force to be reckoned with and is quick to give you a warning bark if you get too close to food dish.
And when all else fails, she knows how to tell a hilarious joke that can go a long way.
Because at the end of the day my big dog plays a “mastiff” role in my life. She may not have asked to take on the heavy burden of helping me through the bad days. She may not understand what PTSD actually is or why I have it, but she’s quick to the recuse when I’m crying and she knows how to snap me out of my intrusive thoughts.
And while the good days are winning and it’s been a while since I dragged her along with me on a run, trying to escape my damning nightmares, I know that when my PTSD decides to take up arms again, I know I’m prepared – because I have a secret weapon at my disposal. And it comes in the form of a very giant-ass dog.
And when the time comes that she can no longer be here to fight along next to me, when the day comes that my heart will be a bit broken and a little more empty, I will always remember the brown-eyed beauty that sat shivering on my hospital bed that night, looking at me with wide eyes that questioned my intensions.
But until that day comes, I will enjoy every waking moment I have with the drooly face dog that also relies on me. Because for now, her story i still being written, and she has many more chapters of chaos and adventures left before the epilogue ends. She has countless days left of begging for peanut butter crackers and snoring on my feet while I write novels.
Because good things don’t just come in big packages.
They come in the form of a happy, drooling, 130 pound English mastiff with a heart of gold.
And forever, I will always be thankful for my mastiff guardian angel. ❤
And as always,
Fight the good fight.
-A xo
Miesha and Me (and Battling PTSD) They say good things come in small packages. And rightfully so, I cannot argue against that logic.
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