#his only job is to sit there and look pretty and have phil's babies :)

[boldlyvoid]

Million Dollar Man | chapter two

18+

summary: Spencer's therapist recommended he branch out and meet new people who don't want to talk about his work... she didn't expect him to sign up for a Sugar Daddy website.

Content warnings: sugar daddy!spencer, age gaps (14 years), daddy kink, blow jobs, kissing, drinking mention, lowkey perv!Spencer, cum play, praise, oral (female receiving), grinding, love confessions, arrangements, Spencers anxiety, (more to add)

word count: 3.4K

a/n: updates on Wednesdays and saturdays at 2 pm est

Chapter Two | Masterlist

She sat on the subway with an anxious pit in her stomach and her purse held close to her chest. Her laptop in her bag, she didn’t want to lose it on her way to the most important meeting of her whole life.

Her story was becoming a book, she was almost done the final draft, they were making touch-ups to the cover and picking the type of paper today.

Her dreams were coming true within the next month, soon she’d have a physical copy of her book, her pre-sales were showing that she’d be on the bestseller list, and her name was finally going to be on the cover of this one.

She sighed and reached for her necklace, holding it between her fingers as she took a few deep breaths. She was doing so much better today than she was last year and it was all because of Spencer, he was the best thing to happen to her. To think she complimented his sweater vest and now he’s the only person in her life she can count on.

All she can think about is him for the rest of her journey, through 4 more stops she keeps her eyes closed as she thinks of all his little facts and his cute laugh. She smiles to herself and the anxiety slips away, she loves him and she knows that for sure, but she just doesn’t know how she loves him.

She’s never had a sibling, her best friends are all women, her previous boyfriends were all shit and her other sugar daddies were never this wonderful, and her parents are lesbians… she doesn’t know what her feelings really are for Spencer, mainly because she’s never known any other men to compare him to.

But she does know the exact moment she realized she fell for him.

He booked a hotel room in DC after a local case, asking her to meet him in there at 10 pm. She was waiting in the bathtub when he arrived, bubbles galore, her hair up and arms open, “welcome home, honey.”

He laughs, “you want me to get in there with you?”

She just nods, “let me take care of you, daddy?”

He takes off his blazer, pulls his tie off and starts to unbutton his shirt. She watches patiently as he gets undressed, and it’s not sexual to her. He’s her person, her best friend, the only human being she would ever share a moment like this with and that’s when it hits her.

She doesn’t accept it just yet.

It’s not until he’s lying on her chest, between her legs, cheek resting on her boobs as she runs a sponge over his back while he gives her a little run down on his terrible week. His co-worker almost died, his mom is stressing him out, the only good thing he has left is her and she knows that.

“And then I get to my moms facility and she’s had a really good day, she knows me and she knows all of my childhood again and she’s all right there in front of me and yet she’s so far away. I’m never going to get all the time I want with her and it’s really hard to accept.”

He shares things with her that he doesn’t even tell his therapist. Because his therapist doesn’t hold him like a child against her chest and tell him he’s okay when he get’s upset.

Y/N loves him, so she kisses his forehead, “I’m so sorry, I have 2 moms if you’d like to have one?”

“It’s okay, I would love to meet them sometime though,” he wraps his arms around her waist a little tighter under the water. “Thank you for tonight.”

“Did I mention my leg is 44 inches from hip to toe?” She asks in the middle of the silence, quoting pretty woman, knowing he hasn’t seen that far into the movie yet. “So basically we’re talking about 88 inches of therapy for the bargain price of $800 dollars a week.”

Her legs wrap around him and their naked bodies are closer than they’ve ever been and yet it’s completely platonic, “I’d spend a million dollars on you if it always meant feeling this good after.”

She runs her cheek along his wet hair as he snuggles into her neck, “mmm, I like the sound of that,” she teased. “My million dollar man.”

Her stop rolls around and she pulls herself out of her day dreams to get off the train and head to her meeting. She smiles as she walks through the station, up the stairs and onto the busy downtown streets when she gets a text with Spencers special chime. She opens it when she gets to where she’s going, safely inside and in the waiting room.

It makes her laugh in the waiting room. People look at her but she doesn’t care, he’s so special to her she feels butterflies in her stomach even when he’s not around.

“Y/N!” She hears her name being called by her editor, he’s over ecstatic as he comes running out to get her. “Come, come we have so many choices to make!” He jumps up and down as he holds her arm, like a child in a candy store.

“Andy, chill man,” she laughs at him and plays it cool, “It’s just the cover being finalized.”

“It’s our baby!” He teases back, pushing his glasses up and tugging her behind the glass doors of the office.

She’s surrounded by people and paper and huge versions of her book cover. She has a sharpie as she fixed mistakes and jots down final ideas. “And I wan’t Phil to look more human and less like data from Star Trek?”

“But Dorothy looks okay?” The artist asks, nervously and Y/N can tell.

“She looks beautiful! You really brought her justice,” she smiles, “really she looks the same in my head! It’s just Phil and I’m sure it’s tough getting a drawing to look like a robotic human, let alone human.”

“I have some ideas?” She opens up more, taking her iPad out and sliding it across the table, “I wanted to give him more of a Sophia feel? His face is silicone but his joints and everything are more like an Elon Musk crash dummy.”

“That’s perfect!” She’s shocked, “why didn’t that go in the first draft?”

“I was worried it was too much,” she’s a little older than Y/N, and yet her anxiety is that of a teenage girl. “I’m going to get working on the final, do you want some emailed versions tonight?”

“Yes please,” she smiles.

“So we’re done?” Andy asks, “we’ve made all our final calls?”

“I believe we have,” Y/N closes her laptop and takes her phone out, taking a photo of the final rough sketch of her book cover on the table to send to Spencer before he comes to pick her up. She can’t wait to see him now.

—

They’re sitting side by side in matching spa robes, he’s getting a pedicure while she gets her nails done. Leaning back in her chair with a face mask and cucumbers on her eyes, she’s never felt more relaxed in her life. And just in time too, her back was killing her from writing, her knuckles hurt and she just needed a break.

Spencer did too, he was genuinely not having a good time at work anymore, every case made him spiral and he always looked to Y/N on days like that. They met more than once a week now, she got $800 every Friday and she didn’t even really need it anymore. He was coving for so much of her bills and lively hood that her savings account was growing and growing because of him.

For the first time in her life she thought she would be okay if a man left her. As terrible as it was, as much as her moms tried to raise her differently, she fell down the daddy issues rabbit hole and she’s never going to find her way out— however, luckily for her, Spencer is down here too, and he brought a flashlight.

He understands her, more than anyone else on earth. He knows all her secrets, every crush and bad grade and snide remark she’s ever kept to herself. He didn’t judge her, he could actually listen to her issues and tell her why she had them. He gave better advice than a therapist and he was able to get information for her if he didn’t know the answer to what she was going through.

He’s absolutely everything to her and yet he’s 14 years older than her, he’s still traumatized beyond belief, he’s sad and ashamed and recovering… but he’s the best man in the whole world and she wishes he could see that. If he just looked at himself from her eyes, if he felt how she did in her soul when they were together, he’d love himself.

They’re too relaxed to drive home, and Spencer knew that would happen beforehand, bringing her a change of clothes (lingerie) and that robe me mentioned. He books a hotel above the spa and takes her to it. Arms linked as they enter the suite, she’s amazed to find more than one gift bag on the bed.

“How many gifts is this now?”

“We’re at 5 out of 24.”

She laughs as she wraps her arms around him in a thank you hug, “this is what you consider 4 gifts? Spencer there are like 8 things on the bed, let alone the massage and manicure?”

“If you think this is too much I guess you’re going to get really mad next week,” he teases as she looks up at him with a surprised look on her face.

“Spencer, I am so busy next week, I cannot be galavanting around with my sugar daddy,” she tries to act like she doesn’t want to go on an adventure with him again.

The last trip they took was the best week of her life. They went to all the historical sites in the UK that she and Spencer had talked about. Mainly old churches and castles, strange poets graves, random art and most importantly; stone henge. It was a trip of a lifetime and he took it with her.

“I watched the rest of Pretty Woman the other day,” he smiles, “and I thought I’d pull an Edward Lewis and really surprise you because you deserve it.”

“You know how the movie ends, right?” Her heart beats really fast in her chest and she wants him to love her so bad but it’s also terrifying now that she’s this close.

“He lets her choose,” he whispers.

“He rescues her,” she corrects him.

“And she rescues him right back,” he really did watch the end of the movie.

It makes her heart skip a beat as she swallows sharply, “what does this mean for us?”

“I have a whole plan, a whole sequence of events I want to stick to. I wanted to make you fall in love with me this week and ask you on your birthday, can we still do that?” He pleads with her, he’s so serious. He’s clearly put a lot of effort into this.

“Absolutely,” she smiles, “but if you’re going to make me wait that long for you to ask, you still can’t kiss me till then. No matter how much I already love you.”

“Really?” He’s so soft with her, she knows he’s not reacting to the teasing. He’s never had someone tell him they love him and then stay after.

“I would never lie to you about that, spence. I know what love means to you, I know how scared you are and I’m scared too. But I know there is no one else in the whole world I’d rather be scared with than you,” she holds him tighter and rubs her nose against his, “so what’s in the bags, daddy? Finish your surprise.”

She plays along perfectly, stepping back and hauling him towards the bed. “I got you some outfits and things for the next 2 weeks, we have a few things planned. We’re going on a flight soon, I have new luggage being delivered to your apartment this week and we’re going to see your moms for 3 days.”

“No,” she shakes her head, “there’s no way, Spencer, I haven’t seen them in 5 years, I’m going to cry.”

“I know,” he cups her jaw with his hand. “They’re really excited to see you.”

She hugs him tight, kissing his neck as she holds him. “Thank you, daddy, do you want me to put something on for you now?”

“I’m just going to take it off you, plus, what your wearing is sexy enough, he whispers back. “You’re always so beautiful, baby.”

“I thought you were saving the best for last?” She asks as she pulls back, overly eager and he can tell.

“I want to repay the favour from the other night.”

She doesn’t mean to gasp and yet she does, “please?”

He pulls on the tie of her robe, opening it enough to snake a hand behind her back and draw her in with a hand on her bare back. “Please what?”

“Please, daddy?” She looks up with her best begging eyes, perfect pout and all. “I want you to touch me, I promise I’ll be a good girl.”

He steps away from her to swipe all the bags off the bed before picking her up and laying her back against the pillows. He kisses down her body, hand on her lover back as she arches, he drags his bottom lip from her belly button to her cleavage. Nipping and sucking at the exposed skin on her chest, pulling her breasts out of the bra to suck on her nipples, she moans and it’s louder than she expected.

As she plays with his hair, he marks her, bruising small little love bites all the way down as he makes his way between her legs, “take me, please?”

He’s been dreaming of this for so long, he can’t even give you an accurate number of times his mind has drifted to the thought of how wonderful she would taste, how beautiful she’d sound…

“Tell me how badly you want me?” He asks as he spreads her legs and kisses her left thigh.

“I haven’t had sex in 10 months while waiting for you. Daddy, please you’ve owned me for so long, just take what’s yours already for gods sa- OH!”

With a broad lick, his tongue flattens against her core and it shuts her up. She gets what she wants, holding into his hair as she tosses her head back, taking it all in and enjoying it. He’s been on her mind for months, every time her vibrator was where he is now, she thought of him. he’s been the man of her dreams longer than she’s known him, and he was proving it.

“Right there, daddy,” she speaks through shallow breaths, “do you know how much I’ve thought of this?”

“You know I don’t,” the vibrations of his voice against her skin are glorious, he looks up at her through his lashes as his tongue flicks over her clit and she shakes a bit.

“Fuck,” she gasps, gripping his hair tighter, “better than I thought you’d be, fuck, too bad you— Jesus, don’t have the stash anymore…”

He stops and looks up at her, the smirk on his face glistening with her juices, “the stash?”

She nods, “I’ve thought about calling it the pussy tickler,” she teases, running her hand down his cheek and swiping her thumb across his bottom lip before bringing it up to her mouth to taste, “I want more of you.”

He kisses back up her body and she reaches for his robe the second he’s close enough. “Just grind against me? I know you’re waiting but we can still feel good together?”

He kisses the side of her mouth and she takes that as a yes, wrapping her legs around him so his hard cock is pressed right against her core as they move their hips in synchronicity with each other. His breathing is heavy as he kisses her cheek and jaw, her nails scratch down his back, he feels absolutely amazing against her.

She feels so empty, she wants him so bad she’s clenching around nothing as she squirms against his cock and wishes she was full.

“I wish I could move time,” she whispers. “Fuck, why can’t it be my birthday?”

He laughs against her, grazing his teeth over her neck and drawing another moan from her but then he stops moving his hips, “why are you so impatient?”

“Remember I said I stopped enjoying everything? Well, taking a 10 month break from sex and thinking about you every time I got off has made me desperate,” her hand cups his cheek, “I’d wait forever for you, but a girl needs to be fucked hard every once in a while.”

Only she could find a way to make something both profoundly beautiful and whorish at the same time, he loved her for it and she knew that now. He smiles and leaned in to rub his nose against hers and it takes everything in her not to kiss him. The same way it was taking everything in him not to slip into her as he began to grind against her once more.

She’s so close, the accidental edging has added a whole new level of desperation she’s never felt before. She wants to cum for him so bad, but more importantly she wants him to cum for her.

“Take my bra off,” she whispers, Spencer’s hands travel behind her back to unclasp it and he helps her out of it before tossing it to the floor.

“Cum for me daddy,” she whispers in his head with a hand in his hair, gripping him tightly as he bites at her neck, “cover me with your cum like you’re marking your territory.”

“Shit,” his hips sputter against hers.

“Say it, I know you want to,” she teases, so close to the edge but it’s too good of an opportunity. She loves seeing him fall apart like this and she can’t wait to see it again. “Who’s am I?”

“Daddy’s girl.”

He grinds down on her harder and faster and she’s so close, the bubble in her gut is reaching a fever pitch and with a gasp, she’s cumming and then she feels it. His load covers her stomach as he pants against her neck and grips her hips tighter as he comes down.

She wraps her arms around him and holds him as close as humanly possible, her breathing still heavy as he rises and falls on her chest. He’s heavy but she doesn’t care, she just kisses the top of his head and thanks him.

He brushes his nose against her neck, nuzzling her like a cat, “do you really mean it?”

“What, honey?” He remembers so much, this could be a question about something she said 2 months or 2 minutes ago and she has no clue.

“You’re not just playing along with my kinks right, you genuinely want to be mine?”

For being her million dollar man, his heart sure was broke. This is why he wasn’t ready, he still didn’t understand why she would want to stay without anything in return, he’s gotten so used to paying her for her time now that his anxiety has managed to convince him that she’ll leave when he stops being worth it to her.

“What does my necklace say?” She asks, knowing how close he was to it. “Read it to me, I forget.”

“Daddy’s girl,” he smiles again.

She soothes her hands over his back, “I would do anything with you because I love and trust you, but also because everything you do is sexy… you could read me the dictionary and I’d still want you to pump me full of cum after.”

“It sounds so crude after,” he laughs, “speaking of, we really need to have a shower.”

“I’ll wash your back if you wash mine?” She teases as he gets up.

“Only if you let me wash the front too?”

She smacks his bare ass and races him into the bathroom, turning on the water and getting in with him while still laughing and carrying on. He’s her best friend in the whole world, there’s no one else she would rather do this with… there was no one she has done this with. No one has made her feel this good, before during and after sex.

Spencer Reid was an anomaly, but he was hers.

Permanent tag list:

@g0lden-cth @doctorspenceryeet @samuel-de-champagne-problems @reiding-recs @shemarmooresfedora @reidsfish @manuosorioh @mochionly @jswessie187 @k-k0129 @blanchardsbk @idonotexiste @measure-in-pain @dreams-in-blxck @doc-padfoot @nomajdetective @mggswhorificlover @dinonuggets1967 @meganskane @gubeskneescrew @kya-li @reidsbookclub @muffin-cup @sassymoon @shirleyrose

Sugar daddy fic (Some tags didn't work)

@mggs-sidehoe @bakugouswh0r3 @mggskneescrews @moonlight-2-6 @spencerreidscumwhore @my-thoughts-are-weird @violetclifford @youabitchhhh @bunny-script @baby-i-am-fireproof @moondustmemories @rexorangecouny @minervaonmars @onlyhereforthefanfics @anonymous-reading @go2sleepducky @kingcrain @beepbooptoop @givemeth @emma-is-a-nerd@wrecky-becky @eternalspence @ne--yo-pets @valerieweasley @coldlilheart @andiebeaword

[selfcarecap]

Peter meeting your dad and trying so hard not to screw up that he ends up saying something he shouldn't have

this is kiiiinda what you asked for but only kinda lmao

warnings: mentions of smut, alcohol, a mention of anal made it in here??? just one line, cringe, peter and reader are both obviously at least 18 but reader lives with her parents tho i guess or maybe she’s just visiting, and let’s all collectively imagine a dad named phil cause i don’t want anyone to have to think about their real dad hsjkd (or if your dad’s name is phil then imagine a dad named… alejandro (idk gashuijodkjiuzafgshdjkf it’s 4 am)

-this is a repost of an old blurb-

You let out a quiet moan when you feel Peter’s lips at your neck.

You focus on the feeling of his warm tongue against your skin, your eyes going wide when you realise he‘s about to give you a hickey, “No, Pete, you can‘t. Everyone will see.“

“Would it be so bad if everyone knew that you‘re mine?“

Resisting giving him a kiss, you push him off of you slightly, “No but I don‘t need my parents to know that we do stuff.“

“Stuff?” He teases, placing a soft kiss on your shoulder, “Stuff like what?” He mumbles into your neck, pulling your hoodie down so the hickey there will be hidden.

“You know what I mean,” you say, letting him kiss your chest.

“Not sure what exactly,” he says with a smirk, “Did you mean when I fingered you in the library last week?”

Heat rushes to your cheeks and it makes you want to bury your face in a pillow. Peter throws his arm over your hips though, stopping you from turning on your tummy to hide from him.

“Or were you thinking of how I fucked your pretty ass—”

“I mean all of those things,” you cut him off, “But don‘t mention that type of stuff when I‘m telling you about my parents.”

“Just stop talking about your parents then,” he smiles, grabbing your cheeks to kiss your lips.

“My dad will be home soon,” you manage to say, between kisses, “Don‘t have enough time for sex.”

“Then it‘s a really good thing that I can make you cum so quick, hm?” He lifts your hoodie and grins when he sees that you’re not wearing a bra, kissing each of your nipples. You help him get rid of your hoodie completely so he can play with your hardened nipples some more.

Sighs of pleasure leave your mouth, and you lie back, enjoying the feeling.

Peter’s fingers slip into the waistband of your jeans, pausing to look at you, “You up for that, baby?”

Nothing but a whimper leaves your mouth, then a quiet “Please.”

He unzips your jeans carefully and slips a few fingers into your panties, finding you already wet and waiting for him. A smile forms on his lips as he continues kissing you, his fingers spreading the wetness around your pussy.

The ache between your thighs increases when Peter starts opening you up with his fingers, and you start to moan; you’re close already.

Just a second later, Peter’s eyes go wide and his fingers stop moving.

“What?” You ask, sitting up. That’s when you hear the front door being unlocked and your dad coming home.

“I told you he’d be home soon!” You say but Peter ignores you, throwing your hoodie towards you which you quickly change into.

“I didn‘t think it would be that soon!” He says finally, “Where should I go? Out the window?”

“First of all you need to get your hand out of my pants.”

You roll your eyes when you see him suck his fingers into his mouth, getting rid of your wetness on him.

“You have to meet him one day,” you reason.

A moment later there’s a knock at your door and you push Peter a few inches away so it’s not obvious how close you two were.

“You got this,” you whisper, “Come in.”

“Hey honey I—” your dad goes quiet when he sees Peter.

“Uh hi dad- you know um, I told you about my boyfriend.”

The look on his face is sceptical, eyes narrowed, “Pedro?”

“Peter.” you correct him.

“Hi sir, I‘m P-Peter,” he stands up to face your dad, shaking his hand with the hand that wasn’t just inside of you. Your dad raises an eyebrow at Peter using his left hand to greet him.

“Pietro-”

“Peter-”

“Peter. Remind me, how long have you been together with my daughter?”

“S-” Peter looks over at you. Your dad knows about him but Peter doesn’t know just how much exactly you’ve told your dad. You simply nod at him.

“Six months, sir,”

“You sure? That took you a while.”

“Oh my god, dad. Stop grilling him. It‘s six months. Can you leave now?”

Peter’s sitting with you again and your dad sits down too, “So, what do you do? Are you a student too?”

“Yes sir. And I have a job at Mr Stark‘s-”

“Tony Stark?” Your dad wonders. You cringe at how many times he’s already interrupted your boyfriend.

“Yes, Tony Stark.”

Your dad gives a somewhat satisfied smile and harshly pats Peter’s back.

“Dad.” You warn.

“I‘m letting you know right now that I don‘t want any grandchildren running around yet,” he stares at Peter.

“Don‘t worry,” Peter says, “We only ever have protected sex.”

You’re all silent for a second. You wonder how horny Peter must have been to completely miss the point of your earlier conversation. You force out a laugh, “Haha, isn‘t he funny, dad? I‘ve really got myself a funny boyfriend, haven’t I? So um could you leave now?”

“I need a beer,” your dad says, and finally leaves your room.

You look at Peter, cringing.

“I should have gone for the window,” he says, burying his head in your neck.

A few hours later, the encounter with your dad forgotten, you‘re watching a film on your bed.

Peter’s hands are under your hoodie, cupping your breasts. (He says it‘s for stress relief.)

The credits start playing and Peter mumbles something into your chest, saying it louder when he realises you didn’t hear, “I need you.”

“Need what?”

“Need my face between your tits.”

You chuckle and lift the hem of your hoodie. Peter immediately starts kissing up your belly.

This time without a knock, your dad opens your door, quickly covering his eyes when he sees the position you and Peter are in.

Peter gets off of you and doesn’t dare look up.

With an annoyed huff, your dad drops a box of condoms on your bed, “I don‘t even want to know if it was a joke or not, but I‘d rather know that you’re being safe than to unexpectedly become a grandfather.”

Both you and Peter remain silent, wanting the sex talk with your dad to be over.

“You don‘t do anything while your mother or I are home, and if I ever see you touch my daughter like that in front of my eyes, Peter, I‘m kicking you out.” And with that, he closes the door.

Peter drops his head in embarrassment.

“At least he remembered your name?” You try.

Peter only groans in response.

[atlafan]

The Good Life - One Shot

a/n: okay so we have business man!Harry, and co-worker Y/N, but also she’s the boss’ daughter???? friends to lovers???? smut??? not proofread????

words: 14.5K

If there was one thing that Harry hated, it was a spoiled brat. He hated when people got whatever they wanted without even working for it. If he ever had kids, he would teach them the value of a dollar. You, however, were an exception to that rule.

Harry steps out of his office, and smells his favorite scent in the world. There was this perfume you’d wear that smells like raspberries. You were officially home for summer vacation, and you had to be here visiting your mother, who was Harry’s boss.

“Carol, is Y/N here?” Harry asks his secretary.

“Yes, she came by to have lunch with Cheryl. She just finished grad school, can you believe it?”

“That’s incredible…so that would make her what? Twenty-three?”

“She turns twenty-four later this summer.” She smiles.

This was good, Harry was only twenty-seven, so that wasn’t that big if an age difference. Carol knew Harry had a crush on you, even though he had never admitted it. He’d been working at the company for five years, so he’s known you for a while now. He’s always kept his distance, though. You went to a private school in high school, and you used to come to the office in your uniform after school. You were a senior at the time, but Harry still felt weird being attracted to you at that time. And sure, Harry’s had a couple of girlfriends that he really liked, even loved. It’s not like he was obsessed with you or anything. He just…thought you were cute.

You and your mother come out of her office giggling. Harry stands up straight and makes sure his tie isn’t all out of sorts.

“Harry, good I’m glad you’re here.” Cheryl starts. “You remember my daughter, Y/N.”

“Sure, hi.” He smiles.

“Hi, Mr. Styles.” You smile.

“Oh, honey, no need to be so formal, especially now that you’re joining the team.” Cheryl beams.

“What?” Harry asks.

“Harry, I know you and I usually discuss new hires, but Y/N officially has her MBA, and well, she really wants to work here.”

“I have since I was a kid. I’m really excited.”

“She’ll be your new assistant. Gotta start her somewhere.”

“But…that’s Carol’s job.”

“Carol is the office secretary, not a personal assistant. You’ve been asking for one for quite some time. I thought you’d be more excited.” She raises an eyebrow at Harry.

Harry looks at Carol, and Carol just smiles nervously.

“I think it’s great.” Carol says. “But a girl with an MBA…that’s a little too entry level, don’t you think?”

“Well, I certainly couldn’t start her as an associate director.” Cheryl laughs.

“It’s okay, I know I need to work my way up. I have, like, zero experience. This’ll be my first real job, so I really don’t mind being Harry’s assistant. I’m good at answering phones and writing messages down.” You smile. “I won’t disappoint you.”

“I didn’t think you would. This’ll be great. When do you officially start?”

“Monday. I was just coming by today to pass in some paperwork to H.R.”

//

Before the end of the day, Harry knocks on Cheryl’s door. She tells him to come in and he sits down.

“What can I do for you?” She smiles.

“So…why’d you choose me to work with Y/N? There’s plenty of people here that could use an assistant.”

“To be honest, Harry, I trust you. You’re close in age with her, you can give her advice on what it’s like just starting out. You were just a mail boy when you started.”

“That was when I was just an intern when I was still in school.” He chuckles.

“And we just loved you so we hired you. You’ve grown up a lot over the last five years, and you work so hard. I think she could really learn a lot from you. I’ll let you in on a little secret too, she actually asked if you needed an assistant.”

“She did?” He perks up. “I mean, uh, did she now?”

“Yes…I think she may have a small crush on you, but don’t mind her. If it makes you uncomfortable I can have her-“

“No!” He takes a deep breath. “No, it’ll be fine. She probably won’t like me much once she gets to know me anyways.”

“She knows you well enough. You’ve been to the house enough times for parties.” She laughs. “In fact, I’m hoping you and Amy will come skiing with us again this winter.”

“Oh, uh, Amy and I broke up.”

“Oh no.” She frowns. “I’m sorry, Harry.”

“It’s okay.” He shrugs. “Just wasn’t mean to be, but I’ll totally come skiing.” He grins. “Could be dating someone else by then anyways.”

“Very true.”

//

Monday morning you show up bright and early. You had a nice light purple blouse on with a black pencil skirt. Your mom had taken you shopping for some new work clothes, and you loved them. You had stopped off at a coffee place and grabbed a ton of different coffees and doughnuts. You wanted to make a good first impression. Most people knew you as Cheryl’s littler girl, but you were almost twenty-four, you weren’t a little girl anymore.

Harry always went to the gym before work, and would eat his breakfast in the breakroom before changing. He stops short when he sees you bent over the table making everything look nice.

“Morning.” He says, and you stand up straight right away.

“Hi, Harry…uh, coffee?” You gesture to the table of assorted drinks.

“Maybe in a bit.” He scrunches his face at the drinks. “Any of those just black?”

“Um…no…do people actually like black coffee?”

“I do.” He smirks. “You’ll want to know that. As my assistant, I’ll expect a coffee on my desk every morning.”

“Oh, uh, alright-“

“Y/N.” He chuckles. “I’m just teasing, I can get my own coffee.” Harry shakes his head and reaches to open one of the cupboards. He pulls out a box of protein bars and takes one out.

“No doughnut either?”

“Hmm….” He peers over and sees a chocolate glazed. “Save that one f’me?”

“Sure!”

“Thanks, I’ll have it after lunch.” He slings his gym bag over his shoulder. “Now, I usually go change in my office, so, don’t come in.”

“I won’t…do you always go to the gym before work?”

“Yup, helps wake me up, gets me ready for the day.”

“Cool.” You smile.

Everyone else in the office was very quick to snatch up the things you brought in, gaining major brownie points. Your mom was happy to see you take a little initiative. For most of the day you sat in on various meetings. You and Harry didn’t even have much time to talk. He shares his calendar with you so you can see when he’s busy, and you share yours with him as well. You had a nice size desk right outside his office. You brought some things with you to decorate it, pictures of friends and what not. Right before lunch, a few people come over to Harry’s office, women. One of them is about to open his door, but you stop her.

“Sorry, Mr. Styles is busy.”

“It’s okay, I’m a friend. It’s almost lunch.”

“But he’s on a call.” Your eyes peer over to the screen where you can clearly see on his calendar that he’s busy.

She sucks her teeth and looks at the other women.

“Fine…guess we’ll see him later then.” She sighs and they all walk away. A few moment later Harry slowly opens his door.

“That was brilliant, thank you.” You turn to look at him. “Those three always try to have lunch with me, it’s pretty annoying. Now I have a barrier that they have to get through.” He checks his watch. “Gotta go. Have a good lunch.”

“Thanks, you too.”

You go into Harry’s office and place the doughnut he had asked you for on his desk. When he gets back he smiles and picks it up.

“Wanna split it?”

“Sure!”

It looked so small in his large hand. You take the half from him and eat it happily.

“Come in around four, we can talk about your first day and what the rest of the week will look like. Sorry things have been so busy.”

“It’s okay, I feel like I’m already learning a lot.” You tuck some hair behind your ear. “I’m really glad I get to work for someone so chill. I was worried I was going to get stuck with Phil.” You laugh.

“Yeah, that would’ve been boring. He’s been here nearly thirty years. Think he has grandkids your age.”

“Gross.” You say and it makes Harry laugh.

At four you come into his office with a notepad. He had loosened his tie a bit, and his sleeves were rolled up.

“I’m really glad this place has A/C.” You say.

“Believe it or not your mum had to fight for that. It was before I started, but she made it happen.”

“Probably the hot flashes.” You start laughing and then you stop. “Sorry, TMI.”

“It’s alright. Didn’t think she went through the change yet.”

“Well, you know my oldest sibling is like…thirty-two right?”

“Ah, forgot you were the baby.”

“Hey.” You pout. “I may be the youngest, but I’m not a baby.”

“You’re the most fun. Your siblings didn’t even ski last year on that trip. They just sat around.” He rolls his eyes. “Anyways, let’s talk about your first day, how was it?”

“Good! I was a little nervous, but it was good. A lot to take in, but I’ll catch on.”

“Where do you see yourself going?”

“I want my mom’s job someday.”

“Ambitious.”

“I’m willing to work for it.”

“Well, you’ll have to wait a little while because when your mum retires, I’m hoping that spot’ll be mine.”

“Okay, so I’ll take your job in the meantime.” You smirk.

“Sounds like a plan.” He chuckles. “Anyways, you have a chance to look at my calendar?”

“Mhm, you have a lot of meetings this week.”

“That’s right, so I’ll need you alert for the phone. Oh, and some meetings I’d like you in on to take notes. Makes it easier for me to pay attention if I don’t have to have my laptop in front of me.”

“Okay.”

“This is your first real job, so I wanna make sure you know about burn out. You’ll accumulate time off, use it. Same with sick time. Mental health is important and you may feel overwhelmed at times. You’ll probably feel really tired by the end of the week. Make sure to check in with me about how you’re feeling. If there’s something you need, we’ll make sure you get it, okay?”

“Thanks, Harry.”

“Just paying it forward. This can be a really great place to work, you just need to know the right people. You know Carol, obviously. She’s the best. Don’t be afraid to go to her for help. She was amazing to me.”

“Yeah, her daughter used to babysit me.”

“Right.” He clears his throat.

“I think you’re the only person here that never saw me with braces.” You laugh. “I think you came on when I was, like, a senior in high school.”

“Sounds about right.”

“You were always so polite. I couldn’t believe it. When I got to college I always hoped the boys would be like you, but they weren’t.” You shrug.

“Okay, well, I think that’s enough for today. Why don’t you head home?”

“Would you mind walking me down to my car?”

“Oh, well, I’m not done for the day yet. I usually stay until six just to wrap things up.”

“Okay, then I’ll stay too.”

“You don’t have to.”

“I want to.”

“You’re not allowed to. Your day ends at 4:30.” He runs a hand through his hair. “But I could take the stroll down to the parking garage with you if that makes you feel more comfortable.”

“If you don’t mind, I felt sort of sketched out this morning.”

“I get here at the same time every day. You can just wait for me if you want in the mornings, and we can walk up together.”

“I’d like that.”

//

Working with Y/N was great. Harry absolutely loved it. You kept him organized and taken care of. You stalked the cupboards with his favorite protein bars, and had started picking up his coffee, just because you wanted to. He always praised you and told you how much he appreciated everything you did.

You were good at your work too. He could give you a project and you’d have it done within a couple of days. You were determined and efficient. He could definitely see you moving up fast, which sort of made him sad. He’d keep you forever if he could, but that would be selfish. He thought his little crush on you would be distracting, but it wasn’t. It almost made you get along even better.

Your mom always hosted a company Labor Day party. You had a huge backyard with a large in ground pool. You couldn’t believe how fast the summer went by, but you were happy to be in a routine. You loved this pool party, and now you were there as an employee. It was always catered with the best food, and your friends would come by. This year, though, you didn’t invite them. You wanted to seem professional with everyone. You even wore a one piece bathing suit with a little sheer skirt tied around your waist.

You were walking around, mingling, when you saw Harry walk in. Usually he brought some pretty date, but the only thing in his arms was a platter of food he offered to bring, and some beers. You were excited that he hadn’t gotten back together with Amy, or that he had met someone new.

“Harry!” You exclaim when you go into the kitchen.

“Hi, Y/N.”

“You don’t look dressed to swim.” You tease him.

“Not really planning on it this year.”

“But it’s so hot out.”

“Drinks will keep me cool.” He winks at you and cracks open one of his beers. “Does it ever get annoying to have so many people around your house?”

“Well, technically, this isn’t my house anymore. I moved into the pool house last month and started paying my mom rent. I wanted to have a little more freedom, you know? But it’s just her in this big place now so I felt bad wanting to fully leave. She said she’s putting the rent money in an account for me so one day when I do buy a house or something, I’ll have something to start with. Plus, it gets me in the habit of paying bills.”

“Look at you, becoming a real adult.” He nudges you and you both go outside. “You’ll be twenty-four soon, right?”

“Mhm, next weekend. I’m going away with my friends. I’m leaving early Friday, don’t forget.”

“Got it on my calendar.”

He smiles and walks away. Of course he does, he wanted to talk with the other, older people at the party. Your mother adored Harry, she always had. Your step-dad liked him a lot too. You were sipping on some wine while the sun was setting, and the party was dwindling. You go over to Harry who was backed into a corner by one of the ladies from finance.

“Harry?”

“Oh, hi! So glad you found me, how about a tour of the pool house?”

“Sure!”

“Excuse us, she’s been dying to show me all day.” Harry says to the woman. He grabs your wrist and leans in. “Walk fast, or she’ll follow.”

You giggle as you both basically sprint away. You key into the pool house and lead him in.

“Oh, wow, this is actually really cool.”

“Thanks! We sort of used it as a guest house anyways, so it didn’t need much work. Just some paint and new furniture. It’s like a little one bedroom apartment. I love it. My friends can come over and we don’t have to worry about being quiet or keeping anyone up. It’s been working out great for everyone so far.”

“I’m happy for you.” He says, looking around. “It’s nice having privacy, isn’t it? I remember when I had saved up enough to move out.”

“Do you have your own house?”

“Haven’t bought any property yet, no. Suppose I could, but I’m fine renting for now. My place isn’t small though.”

“How come you haven’t yet?”

“I don’t know, I just figured I’d buy a house with someone, you know?” He sits down on the arm rest of your couch. “I mean, what if I bought a house, and the girl I was with wanted a different house? I’d want to make it ours. I’ve always wanted to buy my girl the house of her dreams.”

“I thought you didn’t like buying things for people.” You smirk. “But I suppose that’s really sweet.”

“It’s one thing if it’s a gift. I just don’t believe in giving people every little thing they want. They should work for it, you know?”

“My mom was really good about that when we were growing up. She said no all the time. I mean, we were spoiled a little, but at least we’re not brats.”

“True, you could be way brattier.”

“Hey.” You put your hands on your hips.

“Just teasing.”

Just as you were about to step closer to him, your mother opened your door.

“There you are, people are leaving, and…oh…am I interrupting something?” Cheryl asks, a little too eagerly.

“No, mom.”

“She was just helping me escape from Beth in finance.”

“She’s gone.”

“Great, coast is clear.” He stands up. “Better get going myself. Thanks again for a great party. Sorry Ed had to be traveling.”

“You’ll have to come over for dinner next time he’s home.”

“Sounds good, love hearing his traveling stories.”

He gives your mouth a hug, and out he goes. You glare at your mother.

“I’m so sorry.” She says. “I did interrupt.”

“You certainly cooled things by saying that.” You groan. “I finally got him alone, we were talking about things other than work for once! He likes the way I decorated.”

“Honey…Harry’s a little older than you, and you’re fresh out of school. He may just be looking for different things, we’ve talked about this.”

“It’s not like I’m right out of undergrad. I have my MBA, and I’m doing really well at work.”

“You are, you’re doing amazing. Come on, help me say goodnight to our guests.”

//

Harry had already gone to lunch when you were packing up your things to leave early for your girl’s weekend. You notice a card on your desk. You open it and smile. A Visa gift card slides out.

Don’t spend it all in one place. Don’t check your email. Have a great time, and happy birthday. – H

You bite your bottom lip and try not to squeal. That was so sweet of him. You pack up your things and head out. You send him a quick text saying thank you for the gift and out you go.

He missed you the rest of the afternoon, but your thank you text made him smile. You told all of your friends about Harry. He had given you a $100 gift card, which was way too much. He had to like you, there was no way he would have given that much money to just anyone.

//

For Thanksgiving, your family did things a little untraditionally and went skiing. It was something your mother’s family used to scrape together to do, and she continued the tradition with you and your siblings. She bought a huge house in the mountains when you were young. Her friends would come too, sometimes Ed’s parents as well. It was just for people to get together for an entire week, and then share a good meal.

Harry and his girlfriend at the time, Amy, came last year. To be fair you had brought a boy with you too, but it was nothing serious. He would be joining again this year, and he wouldn’t be bringing anyone with him. The house had separate wings, so guests wouldn’t be on top of each other.

There were some other young people there too, along with your siblings and their partners. You were excited to spend time with so many people. None of your siblings wanted anything to do with the family business, which you couldn’t understand. You loved working for your mom.

“Harry!” You hear your mom. “How were the roads?”

“Not too bad yet, just a bit icy.”

“Y/N, help Harry to his room. Look at all the things he’s carrying.”

“She doesn’t need to-“

“Don’t be silly. I’m used to helping you.” You giggle.

You carry one of his bags to his room.

“Thanks.” He walks around and makes sure he has his own bathroom like last time. “Perfect.” He smiles. “I can’t wait to hit the slopes. Is your mum making that green bean casserole again for the holiday? It’s so good.”

“Actually, uh, I make that.”

“Really? Should have known.” He smiles. “Which wing are you in this year?”

“Oh, I’m right across the hall from you actually. My siblings have babies and I didn’t want to risk losing sleep. Is that okay that I’ll be so close by?”

“Definitely. I don’t know who else is going to be here, so it’ll be nice to have a friend so close by. Sure you don’t mind spending so much time with your boss?”

“You’re, like, the best boss ever. Don’t mind at all. Besides, you’re on my turf now.” You step closer to him.

“Oh, is that right?”

“Mhm.”

You hear your name being called from down the hall and you sigh.

“You’ll ski with me tomorrow, right?” He asks before you leave.

“Only if you use the hot tub with me. Gonna need to relax after a long of day of hitting the slopes.” You wink and off you go.

Your mom and Ed make a huge dinner for everyone that night. People were drinking and having a great time. You all head to bed early so those that plan to go skiing and snowboarding, can.

//

The next morning you get all your gear on, and head to the kitchen. Harry was sipping on his black coffee.

“Should I have made that for you?” You smirk and fill your own mug, adding a little creamer to it.

“You’re off the clock, remember.” He takes another sip. “Want some eggs?” He points to the pan of scrambled eggs he made up for everyone.

“Sure! Thanks, Harry.” You beam.

You both share a nice, quiet breakfast together until everyone else comes racing in. Someone makes bacon, and breakfast sausage to go along with the eggs. Harry offers to drive you up to the mountain, no one really seems to notice.

You and Harry have a great day taking runs together. You stop off for a quick lunch at the lodge. Just as you were bringing over a couple of hot chocolates you see him talking to some random girls. You watch as he laughs along at some joke. You hated watching him flirt. He was too good at it. You walk over and hand him his hot chocolate.

“There she is.” He hooks his arm around you and takes the cup of hot chocolate. “Told you ladies my girlfriend would be right back.” He looks at you with a please help me face. “Thanks for the drink, babe.”

“My pleasure.” You kiss his cheek. “Who are your new friends?”

“Oh, we were just leaving.” One of them rolls their eyes and they all leave.

“Nice touch.” He lets go of you and takes a sip of the warm drink. “Mm, this is good.”

“They were bothering you?”

“They invited me to some party. They have to be in college or something. I told them I had a girlfriend. Sorry about that.”

“No worries, it was easy to play along.” You both smile at each other, and he blushes slightly. “Hope it’s okay that I did that.”

“Didn’t mind at all.”

After a few more hours, your legs were starting to get sore. You take a shower the second you get home, and you all eat another big meal together. Ed gets a fire started. Some people play card games. Harry even gets into a game of poker with some of the guys. You announce you’re going to get the hot tub started.

“Oh, that sounds like fun.” Your sister says.

Your mom watches as Harry gets up from his chair to go to his room to change.

“Janey, honey, stay inside, would you?”

“Why?”

“Because I think Harry’s going to join your sister…”

“So?”

“So, why not give them some privacy?” Ed says.

“Ah, I see, so you’re letting her work for you as a way to match them up?” She scoffs.

“No.” Your mother sounds offended. “I just think they’d make a cute couple, and it’s much more appropriate now, so-“

“Mum, she works for him…”

“There’s nothing against it in our H.R. policy. As long as they disclose things if they decide to date, it’s not a big deal. You also didn’t ski all day. You can use the hot tub tomorrow.”

//

You get a two piece on and throw a robe over yourself. You go outside to the back deck where the large hot tub was, and get the jets started. You slip your robe off and get in. A few minutes later Harry comes out with a t-shirt and trunks on.

“Alright if I join you?”

“Yeah! I basically asked you to yesterday.”

You look away as he takes his t-shirt off. You look at him once he’s in. You knew Harry was littered with tattoos. You’d seen him without a shirt on plenty of times. He’d been coming to your house and family gatherings for years. Your mom was really good at creating positive work environments where the boss didn’t need to be this person to be feared. She was a woman of the people, and that’s how you wanted to be. Harry had learned a lot of leadership skills from her, maybe that’s why he was such a great supervisor to you as well. You watch as a sigh leaves his lips and it makes you smile.

“What’s better than this?” He asks, looking at you.

“Not much.”

“Do your legs hurt much?”

“A little. I stretched quickly when I got home.”

“You looked great out there today, you’re fearless on those black diamonds.”

“Oh…thanks.” If your cheeks weren’t already flushed from the steam, they would be from his compliment. You knew he just meant your form and not necessarily your clothes, but still.

“Did I tell you that Paula invited me for Thanksgiving?”

“No!” You gasp. “You’re kidding?!”

“Nope.” He chuckles and shakes his head. “Jocelyn did too, as if neither of them knew I hang with your family. I told them and they were shocked I wanted to go skiing with the boss again. Your mum’s like family to me at this point.”

“You also don’t really celebrate Thanksgiving.” You giggle. “Why go to someone’s home you barely know when you can basically just go on an early winter getaway?”

“Exactly! I don’t understand the women we work with, honestly. The second the picture of Amy left my desk it was like…I don’t know they stopped seeing me as a colleague and more like prey.”

“Does it bother you that so many women flirt with you?”

“It’s not just the women.” He smirks. “And no…not really. It’s mostly harmless. It’s not like they’re putting their hands on me or anything. And it’s not that none of them are attractive or anything.” He sinks a little further in and rests his head on the back of the cushion provided. “I just don’t want to date someone I work with.”

Your heart falls into your stomach. Why would he say something like this to you? You two sort of flirted at work, but mostly things were professional. He met you every morning to walk you upstairs, and he’d always bring you down to your car. Even if he was in a late afternoon meeting, he’d excuse himself at 4:30 to make sure you got downstairs okay.

“I mean, what’s there to talk about when you get home? I suppose if you work in separate divisions that’s not so bad. But the other person knows what you do all day. Seems a little boring.”

“But on the flip side, that person would know exactly what you’re going through and would be able to relate and understand your schedule. Why did you and Amy break up?”

“Uhh.” Harry has to really think about it. It was so long ago now. “We had started talking about moving in together, and she couldn’t understand why I would never try to get out of work earlier so we could go look at places. I stay late so I can leave my work at work. I would try to explain that to her. And then when I would come home early I’d have to be on my laptop answering emails. She didn’t feel prioritized, which I understood was annoying.”

“See? Someone you work with would totally understand.”

“She was also a couple years older than I am, and I could tell she felt like her clock was ticking.” He shrugs. “I wasn’t ready for all the steps she was, at the time.”

“You do tend to date a lot of older women.” You chuckle. “I think one time you brought a woman almost ten years older than you to one of our dinner parties.”

“I used to go out with a lot of divorced women.” He smiles.

“Why?”

“I don’t know, I was young and it was easy to not commit to them. Some of them had kids and stuff, it was an easy out.”

“So you would date just to…fuck and then leave, essentially?”

“I wouldn’t phrase it like that, but I think deep down I saw it as a way that I could be with someone without fully needing to commit. Again, I was young and stupid.”

“You’re still young.”

“And maybe just a little less stupid.”

“Only a little.”

“And what about you? I think I’ve seen you bring every type of guy home with you. Jocks, artists, short guys, tall guys…”

“It’s easier to bring someone to family functions, you know how it is. Some of them were just friends. I never knew which things you were going to come to.” You say nonchalantly.

“Why would me being there matter?”

You realize now what you’ve admitted.

“You know, there’s a fridge out here full of wine, why don’t I-?” You start to get up, but he puts his hand on your shoulder to sit you back down.

“Just answer the question, Y/N.”

“Well…if we’re talking about being young…I obviously had a crush on you…back then.” You were starting to sweat, and it wasn’t from the steam popping out of the bubbles and jets. “I mean, what other teenage girl liked visiting their mom at work as much as I did? I remember the first time I saw you too, I came in after school to drop something off since I was able to drive myself, and I nearly passed out. You were talking with my mom and I felt too nervous to walk up to you. I never felt more like a child in my life. I gushed to my mom about you, and she told me you actually weren’t that much older than I was.”

“So you’d come around more just to see me? You never said more than hello?” He smirks.

“I was way too nervous. You know I almost asked you to take me to my prom?! How embarrassing.” You laugh. “One of my friends took me, obviously.”

“I remember when you came to the office in your dress.”

“It wouldn’t have been so weird if we got together. I was eighteen my entire senior year.”

“You still had a lot of growing up to do. Eighteen legally means you’re an adult, but other than that you’re still just a kid.”

“I realized that the second I got to college. I had a major culture shock. I mean, I was able to do my laundry myself, unlike other kids, but I definitely learned that a maid wasn’t coming around to make my bed or take out the trash. I grew up even more in grad school when I had my own apartment. My mom paid for it, but still.” You shrug. “I was really on my own.”

“Are you happy you went to grad school right after?”

“Yeah, I don’t think I would have gone back if I hadn’t just done it. You have your MBA, right?”

“Mhm, got it a couple years ago through this online program your mum helped me find. It was the only way I was able to move up the way I did.”

“So…it doesn’t totally weird you out that I had a thing for you?”

“Nah.” He smiles. “It’s flattering.”

You may have been willing to expose yourself, but Harry wasn’t. How could he say he had a thing for you too? It still felt weird to him. There was a reason he kept his distance from you. Now, things were less weird. You were twenty-four and he was twenty-seven, almost twenty-eight. You weren’t a child anymore.

“And it’s not weird to say this to my supervisor either?” You cock an eyebrow at him.

“We’re off the clock, away from the office. Besides that, I won’t be your supervisor forever. You’re doing really well, you’ll move up soon.”

“Thanks.”

You desperately just wanted to lunge at him, throw your whole body and mind at him and have him fuck you right there in the hot tub, but the jets slowly came to a stop.

“Think that means we’re supposed to get out. Not supposed to stay in these things long.”

You watch as Harry stands up, your eyes following the droplets of water falling from his chest. He gets out and grabs a towel quickly. He picks up your robe and hands it to you. He looks in the other direction as you stand up and grab it from him.

“Fucking cold out.” He says and you start giggling.

You both go inside and go to your wing of the house.

“You looked away when I got out.” You say as you reach your doors.

“Pardon?”

“When I stood up and got out, you looked away.”

“I was just trying to give you your privacy.”

“Why?”

Now Harry was sweating.

“Because I’m not a guy who ogles women, okay?”

“Are you sure about that? I see the way you glance at me in the office. You’re always complimenting my clothes.”

“You wear nice clothes. Right now, you’re not wearing much, so I didn’t look.”

“My, what a gentleman.” You step a little closer to him. “I don’t mind if you look.” You whisper and then step away from him. “Goodnight, Harry.”

“Goodnight.” He swallows hard as he watches you walk into your room. He goes into his room and locks his door. He wasn’t sure if you were playing a game, but he wouldn’t play it…not while on vacation with your family.

//

The next day he finds himself on the chair lift with your mother. You all had enjoyed a nice breakfast together before heading off to your various activities.

“Sleep well, Harry?”

“Yeah, beds are super comfortable.”

“You don’t mind having it to yourself this time around?”

“Not at all, I can really stretch out.” He chuckles.

“How was the hot tub? It working okay?”

“Uh…yeah…how did you know I used it?”

“Well, the second after Y/N left to go change you got up as well. Doesn’t take a rocket scientist.”

“She had mentioned it the night before. I asked her to ski with me yesterday, and she had said yes, but only if I joined her.”

“Right.” She smiles. “Was it just you two out there?”

“It was.”

“And how was that?”

“What do you mean?”

“Do you enjoy spending time with my daughter? Outside of work, I mean. You both work so well together. You’ve helped her out a lot there, you’re almost like a mentor now. She’ll move up quickly. She’ll be your equal before you know it.”

“She’s very bright.”

“She is. Anyways, outside of work, you both also make a great pair.”

They both jump off the chair once they’re at the top of the mountain.

“What exactly are you saying, Cheryl?”

“I’m saying I’m okay with it.”

“Okay with what?”

“If you wanted to date her, ask her out, whatever, I’d be okay with it. She’s grown woman, she can make her own choices. I would just hope you two weren’t scared to go for it because of me.”

“Cheryl…I…”

“If you don’t like her like that, then I apologize for overstepping. I’m not one of those overprotective people that’s going to stand in the way. I just ask that if you two decide to date, you disclose it with H.R. and keep things as professional in the workplace as possible.”

Before Harry has a chance to say anything, she begins her run down the mountain. He was thoroughly confused. Had she essentially just given him her blessing and permission to ask you out? He wanted to, he really wanted to, but was now the right time? On a fucking family vacation?

//

After the tiring day of taking a crack at snowboarding, you realized skiing was definitely the winter sport for you. Harry had just finished showering and gotten dressed in a sweater and pair of slacks. You were hanging out in your room, just taking some time to scroll on your phone. You hear a knock on your door.

“It’s open!” You call, not looking up from your phone. You were laying on your stomach, with your feet hanging in the air as your knees were bent. Your door opens and you sit up immediately when you see it’s Harry. He leans in the doorway.

“Hi.”

“Hey.”

“How was your day?”

“Good, I tried snowboarding.”

“That’s nice. I went skiing with your mum.”

“Oh, I bet she enjoyed that.”

“She did.” He looks you up and down and squints at your comfy clothes. “Get dressed.”

“Why? We don’t need to be fancy for dinner.”

“Yes we do, because we’re going out tonight.”

“Oh, well no one told me.” You say, annoyed that the messaged hadn’t been relayed. You suppose it made sense since you’d all be cooking a lot once Thanksgiving actually came around.

“You’re misunderstanding me.”

You stop short as you reach your dresser.

“Then explain.”

“You and I are going out to eat. I’m taking you out.”

“Why?”

“So we can be alone.”

Your jaw nearly drops. Both of your eyebrows raise at him. It wasn’t exactly the nicest way for him to ask. This was how he spoke to people in meetings sometimes so they knew he meant business. It always sent a surge through you to see him be so…powerful.

“Would you like that?”

“Yes.”

“Alright then, you’ve got thirty minutes.”

With that, he grabs your door handle and closes your door for you. You were stunned, but giddy. You pull out a cute sweater and a pair of jeans to wear with a nice pair of boots. You fix your hair and makeup, and you’re ready to go. Harry was waiting for you in the living room. He had already told your mother he was taking you out for dinner, and she had told everyone not to make a big fucking deal about it. He hands you your coat and out the door the two of you go. He opens the car door for you, and then he gets in on his side to start driving.

“So, where are we going?”

“Do you remember that Italian place we went to last year? I’ve got a craving for pasta and bread, lots and lots of bread.”

“Skiing all day will do that to you.” You giggle. “Works for me.”

“Good.”

His glove covered hand reaches for your and he intertwines his fingers with yours, resting the conjoined fist on your thigh. He doesn’t look at you, he keeps his eyes on the road. This was his subtle way of saying that was, in fact, a date. You give his hand a little squeeze to let him know that, in fact, you were okay with it.

Once you’re at the restaurant, he opens your door for you again, and leads you inside. You stay close to him for warmth, it was freezing outside.

“Hello, how many?” The hostess asks.

“Two, please.” Harry says.

“That’ll be fifteen minutes. Here’s a buzzer. Feel free to grab a drink at the bar while you wait.” She smiles and he takes the buzzer from her.

“Wanna grab a drink?” You ask him.

“No, we can just get a bottle ordered for the table.” He notices your slight disappointment. “Is that alright?”

“Yeah, makes sense.”

You both wait awkwardly until the buzzer buzzes and you’re brought to a table. You take your coat off and hang it on the back of your chair, and he does the same.

“You can pick the wine.” He says, smiling. “I’m fine with whatever you like.”

“Well, I’ll wanna pick out something that would taste good with our meal. I was thinking chicken parm.”

“You know, so was I.”

“Perfect, then a bottle of red…some merlot maybe?”

“Sounds good to me.”

A waiter comes over with water and bread, and takes your full order. You butter your bread and take a bite.

“Mm, so fresh.” You say, and dab your mouth with your napkin.

“It’s delicious. I won’t even be mad at myself if I fill up on it.”

The waiter comes back with the bottle of wine and opens it for you both. He pours the glasses and leave you alone after. You both clink your glasses together and take a sip.

“So.” You say.

“So.” He repeats.

“Why is this happening?”

“Because…I-“

“I thought you didn’t want to date people you worked with.”

“You’re the exception.”

You were the exception for a lot of things. Harry only exclusively dated older women, and here you were three years younger than he was. He hated spoiled rich kids. But here you were, not so spoiled, but definitely rich. He hated brats, but here you were, knowing full well how much of a brat you could be if you really felt like it.

“Well, don’t I feel lucky.” You say, sarcastically with a smirk of your own.

“Do you not want to be on a date with me?”

“No, I do. I have for a long time, obviously.”

“Obviously.” He repeats.

“How long have you wanted to take me out for?”

“Too long.”

You smile and bite your bottom lip as he smiles and takes a careful sip of his wine.

“You know you’re cute, come off it.” He says.

“Oh, so you only like me for that fact alone?”

“Not true. I like a lot of things about you, but I’m not going to give you the satisfaction of listing them.”

Your food is brought over and you both thank the food runner before diving in. He watches as you elegantly twirl your spaghetti with your fork onto the large spoon so you don’t make a mess. He starts with his chicken.

“This is as good as I remember.” He says. “Much better company this time around though.” He grins and it makes you blush.

“I agree.”

It’s a good date, a really good date. You were able to open up to him about things you wouldn’t normally. You talked about what your friends were doing with their lives. He talked about his friends as well. Some of them were married, some of them were traveling. He was sort of just in the middle, and fine with it. You don’t finish all of your food, the plates were far too big, but you both wrap it up to take it home. Someone was bound to eat it. You’re both given minty chocolates and Harry squares up the check.

“Thanks for paying.” You say as you get your coat back on.

“Don’t mention it.” He says, taking your hand and leading you out of the restaurant.

When he pulls into the driveway of the large house, he only pulls partially in before parking, keeping the car on, heat blasting.

“What are you doing?”

“M’not ready to go in yet. Not sure I want our date to be over already.” He unbuckles and turns slightly to look at you. You unbuckle as well so you can look at him comfortably.

“Good thing it went well, could make the rest of the week pretty awkward.”

Harry laughs at that and nods his head. He grabs a tic tac from his console and pops one in his mouth.

“Want one?”

“Please.” You hold your hand out and he shakes the small container so one comes out. “People don’t value tic tacs enough. They’re the perfect little mints, you know?” You say, sucking on it.

“You’re really cute, you know that?” He leans his are on the steering wheel so he can rest his chin on his palm. He was smiling at you, just truly enjoying your company. “I have that thought at work nearly twenty times a day, and I never get to say it loud.”

“Well, you should. Nothing wrong with an ego boost, right?”

“Y/N.” He chuckles. “Why would I say something that could so easily make you uncomfortable?” His mouth forms into a straight line. “I would never want to make anyone feel uncomfortable where they work. Why do you think I keep my distance, physically? I never lean over your desk, or get too close to you.”

“I appreciate that a lot. You definitely make me feel comfortable.”

“Good. I’d feel terrible if I ever did something…”

“Harry.” You put your hand over the one he wasn’t resting his chin on. “It’s all good.” You smile. “You’ve always been really professional, and respectful.” You give him a reassuring smile. “But we’re not at work right now, so if you wanna get a little closer to me…I wouldn’t mind.”

“So, what you’re saying is…” He lifts his chin from his palm and gently cups one of you cheeks. “If I were to kiss you right now, that would be okay?”

“More than okay.”

He smiles and leans in. You close your eyes in anticipation, and smile once his lips are on yours. You always wondered if something like this would ever happen with him. It mostly happened in unclear, faded dreams. His hand gently moves to the back your neck to pull your closer to him. Your hands find the front of his jacket so you can also tug him closer to you. It was difficult kissing in the front seats of the car, but you were trying to just focus on the way he kissed you.

He sighs happily against you. You get a little carried away and take his parted lips as an invitation to gently bite down on his bottom lip. You let go of him and look up at him through your lashes. He doesn’t let you get to far away before he slots his mouth over yours, and you both essentially grope each other. The windows in the car were starting to fog as you both started breathing heavily, and you weren’t even kissing with tongue! Not yet, anyways. You both still easily tasted like Italian food, the tic tacs only helped a little. Harry could feel the front of his pants tightening and that was when he decided to pull away.

“Right.” He clears his throat and adjusts his jacket. “They’re probably wondering, uh, where we are so.”

Before you can say anything, he throws the car in drive and gets you the rest of the way up the driveway. He gets out and opens the door for you. All you do is smile. You couldn’t stop even if you wanted to. When you get inside various people are hanging around the fireplace. Some people are playing cards, and your mother was in the kitchen getting certain dishes prepared so there was less to do on Thanksgiving itself.

“Hey, you two.” Ed says, with a smile. “There’s some hot chocolate in the crockpot if you’re interested.”

“Thanks, Ed.” Harry smiles and takes his coat off. “Would you like some?”

“Please.” You say and hang up the coats.

Harry gets two mugs and fills them up with the homemade drink. Cheryl smiles at the two of you as you walk in and take a sip.

“How was dinner?” She asks.

“Good, we went to that Italian place we all went to last year. Still just as good, if not better.” You tell her.

“Glad to hear it.” She smiles. “Everyone’s just been relaxing. I think tomorrow we’re taking a trip out for a little hike, and then in the evening we’re going to look at those ice castles. They look so much better at night. Then taking a break on Thanksgiving of course. Too much cooking to do.”

“Sounds good, mum.” You finish your drink and stick the mug in the sink. “Think I’m gonna go get cozy for the night.” You give her a kiss on the cheek and give Harry a look before going to your room.

Cheryl smirks at Harry.

“What?”

“You had a good time, then?”

“Yes.” He chuckles and rinses out the two mugs. He leans against the counter and crosses his arms, studying Cheryl. “What’s your angle with all this? Mum’s usually like me, but you’re really adamant about this.”

“As Y/N’s mother, I want her to be happy. She’s gushed about you for years, and well, you’re both at an appropriate age now, I think it’s fine if you date. I know you really well, Harry. You’re not the type to hurt a girl. Even if it didn’t work out, I know you’d still be sweet about it. I trust you with her. No other angle than I think you could make her happy, I think you could make each other happy. Things didn’t work out with my first husband, that’s why divorce is a thing. Ed and I make each other happy, I didn’t have that before. I see the way you two look at each other. You have something, and it would be silly to not go for it.” She puts her knife down that she was using to chop some vegetables. “I suppose it seems like I’m trying to pimp her out, doesn’t it?” She laughs.

“Little bit.” Harry laughs with her.

“Well, I don’t mean to. She can make those choices on her own.” She looks in the direction you had walked off. “Something tells me she’s waiting for you.”

“And you’re alright with that.”

“Well, maybe just don’t get busy while we’re all under one roof, but it might be nice to have an after date chat, don’t you think? Hang out a little?”

Harry laughs and shakes his head. He makes his way down the hall where his bedroom is. He uses the bathroom, brushes his teeth, and then changes into some sweatpants. He puts a long sleeve bed shirt on as well. He opens his door and sees yours is a crack open. He taps on the door frame.

“Y/N?”

“It’s open.” You say, this time a little less loud. He opens the door and sees you on the bed in your pj’s, snuggled up. “Come in.”

He smiles and closes the door behind him. He sits down on the edge of the bed.

“Wanna watch a movie? This TV has a chromecast.”

“Great idea.” He climbs up the bed to sit next to you as you set everything up. You put an easy going comedy on.

You lean back and he puts his arm around you so you can both get really cozy. It didn’t take long until you both passed out. You woke up in the middle of the night with Harry’s arms wrapped around you, his pelvis pressed to your butt. He liked to spoon, he could sleep comfortably like this with you. You sigh and fall back to sleep easily.

//

Harry woke up before you. He presses kisses to your temple before getting out of your bed. When you turn over you feel where he slept was still warm. He must have gotten up to start his day. You were a sweaty mess after your hike. You couldn’t wait for the sun to set so you could go to the ice castles and see them all lit up.

Harry held your hand the entire time, he even wraps his arms around your chest as he walked behind you, pointing out different ways the lights hit the ice. It was very romantic. Or, it would have been if your siblings weren’t around with their kids. But nonetheless, it was nice.

The next day you all help cook and set up for a wonderful Thanksgiving dinner. You sit right next to Harry, and he holds your hand under the table. You had driven up with your mom, but you opt to drive home with Harry the next day. You both were desperate to just be alone together.

“Do you want me to drop you off so you can unpack and all that? I can come grab you later if you want.”

“That’d be great, and I can just drive myself to your place if that’s easier.”

“Whatever works.”

He helps you get all your things inside, and after a few minutes of kissing, he leaves you to go take care of his own things. You shower and freshen up after unpacking, and then hop in your car to Harry’s. You weren’t sure what your evening would look like, but you didn’t really care. You were just happy to maybe do a little more than kiss.

You text him when you get to his place, and the doorman lets you in. You get into the elevator and head up. You knock on his door and he opens it, yanking you in and shoving you up against the wall next to the door. Clearly, he wanted to do more than kiss as well.

He had one hand cupping your cheek, and the other on the side of your neck to keep you in place. You wrap your arms around his neck and pull him closer. His hands drift down your sides, and you feel yourself being hoisted up. You wrap your legs around his waist and he carries you down the hall to his bedroom. You tug at his hair as your tongue slips into his mouth. His molds to yours as he sets you down. He groans into you and it sends a shiver up your spine. You couldn’t take it anymore.

“Get on the bed.” You tell him. He sits down, but your shake your head. “Sit all the way back, I’m not kneeling on the hard wood.”

His eyebrows fly up when he realizes what you’re talking about. He quickly gets back further on the bed. You crawl on, and sit on his lap. He kisses on your neck while you roll your hips down on his. His hands slide to your ass to grope and squeeze at you. You nip at his lips before getting of his lap and settling between his legs. Your fingers fiddle with the button and zipper on his jeans.

“Is this okay?” You ask, looking up at him.

“Yes.” He breathes. “Do whatever you want.”

You grin and slide your hand inside his jeans, palming him above his boxers. His head rolls back from your touch alone. It was something he’s wanted for so long. You tug his jeans down, he lifts his hips to help you, and you get them all the way off. You lift his shirt slightly to kiss on his tattooed stomach as you work your way down. You tug his boxers down and his hard dick springs out, slapping against his stomach. Your eyes grow wide and you look up at him.

“Jesus.” You say under your breath as you start to rub your thumb over his tip.

“Fuck.” He breathes as his head rolls back again. He felt like he was being pampered.

You let go of him, only for a minute, to get some spit on your hand. You start pumping him up and down, slowly at first. You gets yourself settled on your knees, leaning forward so your ass was in the air, and you kiss his tip. He looks down as you swirl your tongue around him before sinking further down on his hard dick. You couldn’t take all of him, even if you tried, so you pump what won’t fit. One of his hands slides down your back and down to your ass to squeeze at you. His other hand works through your hair to hold it back for you. He moans out when you swallow around him and really start bobbing your head up and down.

“Feels so good, Y/N, fuck.” His hips buck up involuntarily, causing you to gag slightly on him. “Sorry, babe.”

You squeeze one his thighs to let him know it’s okay. Your eyes flicker to his tiger tattoo, and if you weren’t sucking him off you’d smile at it. Harry was so interesting. You couldn’t wait to learn everything about him. Like right now, you couldn’t wait to learn how he tasted, how he really tasted.

“Oh god, fuck, I’m gonna come.” He says through gritted teeth. “Y/N, you don’t have to, ah!”

One of your hands slides up to his throat. You just needed him to shut up for a second so you could focus on the task at hand. His eyes were wild while he looked down at the scene before him. Your little hand wrapped around his throat while you sucked on him vigorously. You move up to just suck his tip while his come shoots into your mouth. You suck and suck until he can’t stand it anymore. You pop off him and let his throat go free. You make eye contact with him while you swallow.

“You…you didn’t have to do that.” He says, while trying to get his breath.

“I know, I wanted to.” You wipe the corners of your mouth, and tug his boxers back up. He winces slightly from the sensitivity.

“Alright.” He lifts his shirt up overhead and pins you down, you giggle at his sudden movements. “Your turn.” He unzips, your pants, but you stop him.

“I can’t.”

“Wh-why not?” He pouts.

“I got my period this morning.”

“Of course.” He sighs and hangs his head.

“Sorry.” You giggle and runs your hand through his curls.

“It’s okay, know you have no control over it.” He sits back up against the headboard and pulls you into his arms. “That was really nice, thank you.” He pecks your lips and you smile.

“My pleasure.”

“Want me to order something for dinner? I haven’t had a chance to go grocery shopping yet.”

“How does Chinese sound?”

“Perfect.” He kisses you again before getting off his bed. You lay back and sigh. His bed was really comfy, you could get used to this.

//

Monday morning everyone was feeling refreshed from the holiday. You and Harry drove separately since you still finished work earlier than him. He walks you upstairs like always, only this time before he goes into his office to change out of his gym clothes, he gives you a kiss and a pat on the bum. He knew he had to be careful, though, not too much PDA in the office.

Once he was changed he comes out of his office. You had his coffee ready to go like always. He takes it happily, but decides to speak up.

“I wanna start getting my own coffee.”

“Why?” You frown.

“I feel weird with you doing that kind of stuff for me now that we’re…involved.”

“Oh, is that what we’re calling it?” You smirk.

“Hanging out, dating, whatever.” He shrugs. “Getting me coffee doesn’t fall under the umbrella other tasks as assigned.”

“But it did before?” You raise an eyebrow at him.

“Only because it was an excuse to have a nice chat in the morning.” He smiles and sips his coffee. “You understand what I’m trying to say, though, right?”

“I do.” You smile at him, and then bite your lip. “Um…when do you, I mean, should we…”

“Let’s see how things go before we go to H.R., yeah?”

He could read your mind, and it gave you some relief.

“Okay.”

He winks at you and goes back into his office. He had a ton of emails to answer from being off last week.

“Y/N?” He calls for you and you go right in.

“Yes?” He shoots his eyes at you. “Mr. Styles.” You grin.

“If I forward you a few emails, could answer some people for me? I hate to make you the middle man, but some of this doesn’t need my attention.”

“Of course! Happy to help.” You smile.

“Thanks you.” He smiles back. “Would you mind closing my door? I have some calls to make.”

You nod and close the door behind you. He forwards you about ten emails, but you didn’t mind. It gave you something to do. You worked fast, so you often would get bored. He’s in and out of his office once his calls are made. When noon finally rolls around he comes out of his office and drums his fingers on your desk. You were standing up, thanks to having that kind of desk, and had your earbuds in. You raise an eyebrow at him and pause your music.

“Yes?”

“It’s lunch time.” He grins.

“So it is.”

“Would you like to join me?”

“Where?”

“Just in my office.” He shrugs.

“Alright.” You smile. “I just need to heat my food up.”

“Great, come in when you’re all set.”

You go to the breakroom to grab your good. You lean on the counter next to the microwave as you wait for your food to heat up. Paula and a couple of other women walk in.

“Oh, hi, Y/N.” She says.

“Hi ladies, have a good Thanksgiving.”

“Yeah, it was good. Probably not as good as yours though. Must be nice to go skiing.”

“It’s an old family tradition.”

“Well, it’s not just family though, is it?” She scoffs and grabs her good out of the fridge.

“Everyone that goes might as well be.” The microwave beeps and you grab your food. “Is there a problem?”

“Not at all.” She shrugs and puts her food in the microwave. “Must be nice, is all.”

“What?”

“To just get everything you want all the time.” Another woman says.

“I don’t…I work really hard for the things I have.”

“Right, must be nice to just pay mommy rent while you live in her pool house.”

“She’s alone a lot. My step-dad is a pilot, he’s not home with her when she’d like him to be. I wanted to move out and she asked me if I’d want to live in our…you know what? I don’t owe any of you an explanation. You can just be bitter.” You scoff and leave quickly. You go right into Harry’s office and sit down with a huff.

“Everything alright?”

“No.” You shake your head and angry stick your fork into your lunch. “There’s a bunch of bitches that work here, and I’m annoyed.” You sigh. “You don’t think everything’s been handed to me, do you?”

“I think you’ve lived a very blessed life, but your mum’s done a good job raising you. I’ve seen you act like a real brat before, but I wouldn’t call you spoiled or anything.”

“Gee, thanks.” You roll your eyes.

“Tell me what happened, what’s going on?”

“Paula and her crones were a little rude to me in the breakroom.”

“They’re just mad because I don’t pay them the time of day, and they’re jealous you work for me. I’m sorry you’re getting the brunt of that.”

“It’s okay…maybe we should go to H.R. sooner then. If they find out about anything before we disclose…they could just make it worse. The whole thing just feels so high school, it’s fucking stupid. Grow up.” You shake your head and take a bite of your food. You look at him. He had his chin resting on his palm, smiling at you. “What?”

“Nothing, you’re just cute when you get all fired up.”

“You think everything I do is cute.” You chuckle.

“You got me there.” He takes a bite of his own food. “We can go down a bit before you leave for the day if you like. I don’t want you feeling uncomfortable with anything. And…I mean…do you want me to talk to your mum?”

“About what?”

“I can tell her that the other women have been rude. I can tell her what they’ve said to me before too. Or I could just straight up talk to them myself. I don’t care.”

“Let’s just go to H.R. first.” You take a sip of your water. “I don’t wanna add fuel to the fire.”

“Fair enough.” He sighs. “So, how would you like to come over tonight? I have stuff to make this chicken and noodle dish in my instant pot. Only takes like thirty minutes once it’s altogether.”

“That sounds amazing, but I can’t. I make dinner with mom on Mondays. We make a big casserole that we can have during the week. You could come over if you wanted. You know how much she loves when you come over for dinner.”

“I wouldn’t want to intrude.”

“You wouldn’t be, please, come to dinner.”

“Alright.” He smiles. “Um…” His voice gets a little quieter. “How’s your, uh, are you still, um…?”

“Yes, I still have my period.” You chuckle. “I promise, once it’s done, you’ll be the first to know.”

“Thanks, I appreciate that.” He stands up from his desk and comes over to you. He cups your cheeks in his hands and leans in to kiss you. Just as his lips were on yours, there’s a knock on his door. “Jesus Christ.” He groans. He walks over to the door and opens it. “Yes?”

“Hi, Harry.”

“Oh, hi, Jennifer.”

“I came by because I have some of that pumpkin br-“ She stops when she sees you sitting. “Sorry, am I interrupting?”

“Just a little lunch meeting.” You say, standing up. “Lots of emails and meetings to get through this afternoon. Mr. Styles wanted us on the same page. Excuse me.” You stand up and look at him before leaving.

“Leave it open, please.” He says to you and you nod.

“Anyways, I brought you that pumpkin bread you like so much.”

“Ah, thank you. You didn’t have to do that.” He takes it from her and he puts it on his desk.

“Well, you raved about it last year, so I made sure to make more.” She blushes. “How was your break? You went skiing with Cheryl’s family, right?”

“Yeah…it was fun. I get along well with everyone.”

“Must be nice to be so close with the boss.”

“I suppose.”

“Anyways, um, do you have plans Friday?”

You hear her ask it, and your eyes widen with rage. You never really realized how much people through themselves at him.

“Uh, well, this is sort of awkward, but I’m sort of seeing someone, and I’ll probably be seeing them Friday, sorry.”

“Oh! I’m so sorry, Harry.” Her face goes red. “I had no idea.”

“Well, that’s the funny thing about having a personal life, it’s, uh, personal.”

You can’t help but laugh when you hear him say that. You clap your hand over your mouth so they don’t hear you. You watch Jennifer leave his office in defeat. He comes out to you.

“I’m so sorry you had to hear that.”

“Oh, it’s fine.” You shake your head. “So, you’re seeing someone, huh? I wonder how long that’ll take to spread around.” You raise an eyebrow at him.

“Very funny. What did you want me to say, that I have a girlfriend? Haven’t really had that conversation yet have we?”

“Conversation about what?” Your mom says. “Harry, we have a meeting in five, get your laptop. Phil’s in on this one.” She rolls her eyes. “Hi, honey.” She smiles at you.

“Hi.” You smile back. “Can Harry join for dinner tonight?”

“Course he can, happy to have him.” She looks back at Harry. “Let’s go.”

Harry grabs his laptop and follows your mom.

//

Around 4PM, Harry grabs you so you both can go see Mary in H.R.

“Hi you two.” She smiles. “To what do I owe this visit?”

“Mary, Y/N and I are, uh, seeing each other.”

“Oh! Well, that’s great. Is it serious?”

“It could become serious, it’s still new.” You say. “We just wanted to do the right thing and disclose it.”

“And did this start on company property?”

“No.” You say at the same time.

“Alright then, let me get the forms. Y/N, you know things could get sticky with Harry being your supervisor.”

“I know, we’ve discussed it.”

“And…your mother…?”

“She’s thrilled.” You say with a smile.

“Alright, here you go. Fill these out and bring them back to me tomorrow morning.”

“Can do, thanks Mary.” Harry smiles.

Harry walks you out to your car and gives you a quick peck on the cheek goodbye. He tells you he’ll be over around seven for dinner, and you tell him to bring something to sleep in.

//

“Wait, so has everyone in our office hit on you?” Your mom asks Harry as she spoons him some lasagna. “Why did you tell me before?”

“It wasn’t really a big deal.” He shrugs.

“It’s bound to get around that he’s seeing someone, and it’ll only be a matter of time before everyone finds out it’s me.”

“Well, then, they’ll just have to deal with it, won’t they? We’re all adults.” She shakes her head as she sits down. “If anyone has an issue, they can bring it up to me.”

Everyone takes a bite of the lasagna.

“Mm, well done, Y/N.” Your mom says.

“Yeah, it’s delicious.” Harry smiles at you.

“Thanks.”

After dinner, you and Harry say goodnight to your mom and head out to the pool house. You settle in on your couch for some TV and much needed snuggles.

“Does your mum ever leave to visit Ed on his routes?”

“On the weekends sometimes, why?”

“Well, if you don’t wanna be alone on the property, you can always stay with me.”

“Aww.” You kiss him on the cheek. “Thanks.” You shift yourself so you can straddle his lap, and bury your head in the crook of his neck. He wraps his arms around you and rubs your back.

“Feels nice to just do this.”

“Mhm.” You nuzzle into him further.

“Comfortable?” He chuckles.

“You have no idea.” You kiss his neck and sigh. “Wanted this for so long, Harry.” You kiss his neck again, and linger a little this time.

“Don’t.”

“What?”

“You’re gonna get me all riled up, and I can’t do anything to you that I want to.”

“I could just take care of you again, I don’t mind.”

“But I wanna be able to take care of you, Y/N.”

You lift your head so you can look at him.

“Just a few more days, then I’m all yours.”

“Can’t wait.”

“So…do we really have plans Friday night?”

“Sure.” He smirks. “Anything you have in mind?”

“I need to go to the mall to do some holiday shopping. Feel up to it?”

“The mall on a Friday after work?” He raises his eyebrows. “You’re serious?”

“I’m an expert shopper.” You peck at his lips. “And if you come with me you’ll get a reward.”

“Oh, I like the sound of that.”

//

Friday after work, you and harry drive out to the mall. Everyone at work seemed pretty cool the rest of the week. Maybe a memo went out? You tried not to question it. All you could focus on was how cute Harry looked in his suit while walking around the mall with you. You at least had the sense to change.

“Let’s see, mom’s been looking for a new baking set, so let’s stop in at Crate and Barrel, first.”

“Sounds good.”

Harry basically just follows you in and out of a ton of different stores. He’s a perfect gentleman and carries all your bags. You insist you can carry some, but he tells you you’re crazy, and you just keep walking. Eventually you walk by a Victoria’s Secret. You hadn’t shopped there in a really long time since it was super overrated, but a wicked idea comes over you.

“Harry, are you getting hungry?”

“Starved.”

“Why don’t we go to Chipotle? Just have something quick? I need to stop into a couple more stores. You know what I like form there, right?”

“The tacos.”

“Exactly, why don’t you head in and I’ll meet you, yeah?”

“Works for me.”

You watch him walk away before going into the store. Your period ended Wednesday, but you two hadn’t had time to get intimate. You look at a few things, and fine a cute little turquoise set that you think he’d like.

“Would I be able to buy this and then go change into it?” You ask the woman at the register.

“Of course, miss.”

You find Harry in Chipotle, and scarf down your tacos. He gets everything you bought into the car and off you go.

“Mine or yours, babe?” He asks.

“Let’s go to yours. Your bed is so comfy.”

“So is yours.” He rubs his hand over your thigh.

“I do my best.” You chuckle. “But I’d definitely rather go to yours tonight.”

He smiles and takes the exit for his apartment. You tell him the bags can just stay in the trunk for now. You both get upstairs, and he sighs with relief when he gets his tie off.

“Just gonna change.” He says to you.

“That’s a good idea, I’ll do the same.”

You follow him in and he raises an eyebrow at you.

“Where’s your bag?”

“Oh, I just figured you’d be give me something to wear.”

“Sure!” He turns to his dresser. “Do you want sweatpants, shorts, just a big…” he turns back to you and his jaw drops when he sees your lingerie. “When…where…what’s happening right now?”

“Why do you think I sent you off to get food?” You stroll over to his and run your hands up his chest. “Do you like it?”

“You look incredible. Been dreaming about this.”

He wraps his arms around you and kisses you. You moan when his hands run down your back and down to your ass.

“I’m gonna treat you so well, make you feel amazing because you don’t deserve anything less.”

He lays you down on the bed and strips down to his boxers. He hovers over you and kisses down your chest. He sucks on the fleshy area that’s spilling out of the top of your lacey bra. His hands move around your to unhook it, and he gets it off of you all the way. He sucks on each of your nipples, swirling his tongue around, really putting a show on for you.

“You always smell so fucking good, I love your perfume.” He says as he kisses down your stomach.

“I knew you liked it.” You run a hand through his hair. “I just had to keep wearing it.”

“Drives me crazy. It’s the sweetest smell in the world.”

He sucks a nice bruise on your hip while his thumb trails over the lace material of your panties. He could see that you’re wet for him already, he can feel it to once his thumb pushes gently inside. You groan while he does it.

“Please, don’t tease me, Harry.”

“But that’s the best part. Gotta really make sure you want it.”

“I do, I swear, please, just take them off.

“You went to all this trouble to buy these for me, shame for them to go to waste.” He kisses you through the material and your hips buck up towards his mouth. “So reactive.” He smirks.

“You know, I could easily just go home and do this myself, so if you want to-“

“Don’t be like that.” He pouts and hooks his fingers into his panties. “I’m simply trying to savor the moment. I’m about to see this precious little cunt for the first time. You have no idea how honored I feel.”

He slides your panties down your legs and tosses them aside. He kisses both of your knees before spreading your legs apart. He gazes at you.

“It’s beautiful.”

“Harry.” You giggle and kick at him. “Stop it.” You were starting to blush.

“Can’t help it.”

He gets settled between your legs and spreads you apart with his thumbs. He uses his fingers to rub around your already slick folds. He sucks the same fingers into his mouth and it makes you bite your bottom lip. His middle finger runs along your center before slowly pushing inside. You gasp when you feel the cool of his ring hit you. He pumps it in and out of you, just trying to gauge how tight you may be.

“When was the last time?”

“When was the last time what?” You grunt.

“You’re really tight, not complaining, but I don’t wanna hurt you.”

“I don’t know, um, I can’t really think right now while you’re doing that.”

“Alright.” He takes his finger away from you completely and you whimper.

“The last time it was someone, and not just one of my dildos was over the summer, alright?”

“When do you use the-“

“Not that often, only sometimes. I’ll fucking let you use one on me sometime if it means you’ll just keep working me over, please, Harry.” You pout at him.

“Can’t say no to that can I?”

He uses both of his hands to keep your legs open, and he dives right in. He licks all around you and sucks on your clit harshly.

“Oh my god.” You tug at his hair just as hard it makes him groan against you.

You feel his teeth graze over the little nub, and it makes you clench around nothing. You wanted his fingers again, but he needed his hands on your thighs to keep you open. He pulls up from you.

“Ride my face.”

“What?!”

“Come on, come sit on my face. I’ll fuck you with my tongue, it’ll feel great.”

He lays back with his head on the pillow and gestures for you to come to him. You shrug and straddle his face. You gasp when you feel his tongue on you again. You grip at his head board, and your eyes roll into the back of your head when you feel the slight scruff on his chin rub up against you. He gets his tongue inside you, and you essentially start riding it. His hands grip your hips, pressing bruises into your plushy skin.

“Oh my god, Harry, holy shit.”

The bed was shaking at this point. You thought you might be hurting him, but when you looked down his eyes were closed and he looked like he was in pure bliss fucking you with his tongue.

“Fuck, oh my god, fuck, fuck!” You scream as you feel your release come.

You feel Harry suck on your cunt so he doesn’t miss a drop of anything. He slowly lifts you off of him so he can get some air. His mouth, chin, and a little of his nose were wet with your slick.

“Sorry.” You use your hand to clean him up.

“Don’t be.” He licks his lips. “You taste so fucking good, could do that for hours.”

“How about you use your dick instead?”

“You’re ready for that? We don’t have to move that fast if you don’t want to.”

“Harry, I really want you to fuck me. I’ve wanted you to fuck me for five fucking years, please.”

He grabs you by your throat and pins you down on the bed.

“No need to beg, darling, all you had to do was say you wanted to.” He lets you go and kiss your lips. He stands up off the bed and takes his boxers off. “See, I’m getting nice and naked for you.” He smirks. “Do I need to use a condom or…?”

“Nah, I have an IUD. Wanna feel you.”

He smiles and gets back on the bed. He pumps himself a couple of times and spreads you back apart. He pushes inside you and you can’t help but moan loudly. You’ve been dreaming of this moment for so long, and so has he. It’s incredibly satisfying.

“Ngh, you’re so fucking big, it feels so good.” Your head rolls back as he bottoms out.

He starts moving slowly as he buries his face in your neck. He sucks on your soft skin and lets it go with a pop.

“Fuck.” You breathe.

He snakes a hand between the two of you so he rub at your throbbing clit. You knead one of your own breasts, but he swats your hand away so he can do it.

“You just need to tell me what you want, want you like, and I’ll do it, okay?”

“Okay.”

He dips his head to suck on your nipple and your hands move to his back to dig your nails in. You start tightening around him when you feel his fingers rub your clit with more precision.

“Oh, shit. Oh my god, Harry!” You were panting. You felt like your heart was going to beat out your chest. Your back arches when you come again.

“Feel so fucking good, Y/N.” He fucks your through it, and wait for your to calm down before pulling out. You whimper at the loss of him. “Don’t worry, got a nice position for us I think you’ll like.

He sits up against the head board, and gets you in his lap, facing away from him. You were on his dick again and it felt amazing. You back was flush with his chest, and your head was on his shoulder. His tongue was in your mouth while one of his hands was rubbing your clit in rhythm with his thrusts, and the other was snaked around your chest to keep you in place.

His mouth leaves yours so he can kiss on your neck and shoulder. He looks down at the way he’s rubbing you and then at your face. Your head was rolled back into his shoulder and you were biting your bottom lip.

“Feels good, babe?”

“Feels amazing.” You tighten around him.

“Wanna come together?”

“Yes.”

“Alright, just hold on for me.”

He stops rubbing you, and moves both of his hands to your hips. He moves you up and down faster so you were basically bouncing up and down on him. He was hitting your g-spot perfectly.

“Harry, fuck!”

“Hold on, Y/N.” He groans. “Almost there.”

“Harry, please!”

“One second.”

All of the blood in your body was rushing to your ears, you felt like you couldn’t hear anymore. Your vision was starting to go blurry as well. He nips at your earlobe and then you feel his breath on you.

“Come for me, baby.” He whispers and that’s when you let go.

You feel his warm come shoot up inside you. You cry out as your orgasm prolongs. It was so good, so very good. You both slowly catch your breaths from the ordeal. Your legs felt like gelatin as you stood. You desperately needed to pee.

When you come back out he tosses you a large t-shirt. You giggle and put it on, and then crawl into bed with him. He throws his arm around you as you snuggle up to his chest.

“I don’t wanna sound clingy, but I hope you know, I’m never letting you go.” You say, pressing kisses to cheek, neck, and chest.

“Lucky for you, I like clingy. M’not letting you go either.” He presses a kiss to your forehead, and you both get settled into a goodnight’s sleep.

//

After basically staying in bed with Harry all weekend, you found it difficult to concentrate at work. You had so many scenarios in your head, but the one you wanted most was for him to bend you over his desk, but he made it clear with you that the office was off limits. He explained that he didn’t want to do anything to risk losing his job. You had to respect that.

The holidays came and went. You each got each other something small since you had only been together for about a month, but you spent the New Year together and it was just wonderful. Most people at work knew you were dating Harry. It was hard not to when he’d randomly get you flowers to keep on your desk, or when he might steal glances of you during a meeting.

Once summer came around again, and you had been there for an entire year, you were up for a promotion. You were excited because it involved you having your own office, but you were sad that you wouldn’t be handling things for Harry anymore. You had to train a new assistant, and you were even less thrilled when you saw it was just some girl fresh out of her undergrad. You thought you’d be jealous, but you watched how Harry was with her. She was to only call him Mr. Styles, and he did the same things with her as he did with you. He never got too close, the door was rarely closed if they were alone together, and a picture of you was front and center on his desk. No room for funny business.

He loved staying over at your place, and swimming in the pool with you, especially at night, and especially when your mom was away. You could get away with skinny dipping, which meant getting away with getting fucked in the pool. You’d cook together and hang out almost every night.

“Hey.” He says to one Saturday afternoon as you both were laying out by the pool.

“Yeah?”

“I’m in love with you.”

“Harry.” You chuckle. “You say it like you haven’t been saying it for the last six months.” All he does is pout at you. “I’m in love with you too.”

He smiles and goes back to facing front, taking a sip of his drink. Life was good, life was very, very good.

[phanfictioncatalogue]

Undiscovered Gems (2) Masterlist

part one

addict with a pen (ao3) - artdeficient

Summary: a sad boy loves oceans and sea breezes and the time in between day and night, so he sits by the sea with a sketchbook and sometimes, another boy joins him and sometimes, that’s okay

August (ao3) - glowingatmosphere

Summary: When Dan returns home and meets up with his childhood friend Phil after they’ve finished their first year of uni, he notices that things between them are different. As they rekindle their friendship, Dan completely immerses himself in the new feelings that he’s developing for his best friend. But when Phil starts talking about another boy, Dan begins to wonder whether Phil was ever really his.

baby blue and bubblegum pink (ao3) - phantasticworks

Summary: Dan paints his nails. Phil wants to try it.

Crossing Eyes, Dotting Teas (ao3) - indistinct_echo

Summary: A person isn’t supposed to just happen upon their comfort-celebrities in their building’s bin room. That isn’t how life works.

A fic about serendipity and what it means to be a good neighbor.

Dirty Little Secret (ao3) - A_Million_Regrets

Summary: There he was, sitting huddled next to his beautiful, absolutely perfect wife, looking calm and happy and peaceful and like he hadn't fucked up Dan's entire fucking life, like he had never crushed Dan's heart under his feet.

Human (ao3) - Nefertiti1052 (Succubusphan)

Summary: Phil is a Police officer and former Blade Runner who wants to be left alone, but fate will put him to the task of investigating a new lead regarding a Replicant. To his surprise, he's met one of the suspects before.

I Will Find You (ao3) - Amateum

Summary:

“But what if I make a complete fool of myself?” “Then you’ll never have to see him again.” “But I will. We literally pass each other every day, and once we know what the other looks like- “ “Then you will resolutely ignore each other and continue exploiting the Streetpasses to get more puzzle pieces.” PJ interrupted. “It’ll be okay. Besides, that’s the worst-case scenario. Most likely, you’ll have enough to talk about for at least one conversation. And maybe,” he added sarcastically, “you’ll make a new friend for once.” Dan laughed. Right. Make a friend out of a complete stranger. Like that’ll happen.

Or: Dan and Phil keep passing each other every day and have managed to strike up a tentative friendship. The only problem is that they've never met in person.

i've seen tomorrow (i've seen yesterday) (ao3) - itsmyusualphannie (itsmyusualweeb)

Summary: “The past is a foreign country: they do things differently there.” – L. P. Hartley.

future time travel au in which dan and Phil's jobs are to fix fractures in the timeline. this particular mission will take them back to 2019, but how well will they work together when they've just had a fight?

ivy (covered in you) (ao3) - irrationalqueer

Summary: Dani’s job now is to be guided - she is used to living in the darkness with Fiona, but for once they are headed toward the light.

Life’s Beauty is in its Impermanence. (ao3) - phansb

Summary: Daniel Howell and Phil Lester live in Kingston upon Hull, and begin chatting after a moment of striking bravery at a café. Over the next few days, they become increasingly more attached to one another, until Phil must leave to Isle of Man for Christmas.

Metaphors and Phobias (ao3) - Alaz

Summary: Phil Lester has social anxiety but his dream is to go to his favourite author’s book signing and tell him what his earliest work means to him.

Dan is a famous writer of erotic sci-fi except for his first series that he abandoned for misterious reasons.

Kath knows famous writers need to eat.

never believe it's not so (ao3) - lestered (clonetrobed)

Summary: Dan, in his ten short years, has pretty much classed himself as a skeptic. The Creatures sound just about as real to him as any dumb old urban legend or cryptid. But it’s pretty hard not to believe in a certain type of magic when he’s watching Phil’s dad literally light a candle in the center of the table by carefully blowing a tiny flame onto the wick.

Ribs. (ao3) - embrcethevoid

Summary: Dan and Phil throw a party, hoping to change their normal/loser lives. In the middle of adversities and growing up, it did, but not in the way they expected. Way, way better.

"Sir, How Old Is The Boy?" (ao3) - fourthingsandawizard

Summary: Dan and Phil take a quick break from their world tour, staying in an Airbnb that Martyn and Cornelia rented for the week from an eccentric Australian wizard. When Dan wakes up one morning as his ten-year-old self after drinking a magical tea that Phil accidentally brewed for him, they're forced to look for a solution before their viewers—or Martyn—can find out about it.

The Road To Being Okay (ao3) - WaterHorseyBlues

Summary: All Phil wanted was for Dan to be okay.

The Season's End is a New Beginning (ao3) - transdimensional_void

Summary: Lady Daniela and her close friend Philippa take a fateful stroll in the park. (Fem!Dan and Fem!Phil, Regency romance parody AU)

The Sun, The Moon, The Stars (ao3) - ShippingFangirl26 (IceQueenJules26)

Summary: Lonely armourer Dan meets a strange human on his space travels and learns what cannot be long hidden...

wait for me to come home (ao3) - manchestereyes

Summary: The story of Dan and Phil, as told by their Starbucks sofa. (Or, the bits of it that the sofa could catch anyway.)

words don't come so easily (ao3) - heartsopenminds

Summary: When Dan agrees to be a celebrity guest on a reality show for artists, his only aim is to raise his profile a little and appease his agent.

That is, until he meets the artists who'll be painting his portrait, and one in particular catches his eye...

You're Not Alone (ao3) - AmazingDandroid (Stardust_Ti)

Summary: Phil Lester always loved finding things washed up on the beach.

This time. He found something worth a lot more than shells and pebbles.

[jerakeenc]

June-Sept Re-recs (12)

This is the best of the best of the best of what I've reread in the last couple of months. I end up downgrading a lot of the fics I reread because even my tastes change over the years. These are the ones that stay awesome, even after many rereads.

(For comparison, I put a little sparkle ✨ image next to the most perfectest (yup!) fics in my regular rec posts. The fics in this post are all sparkle.)

I included my first-read date. The calendar says 2011 was ten years ago but I have my doubts.

Now We've Learned To Kiss The Sky by torakowalski

MCU | Clint/Coulson | Explicit | 13,800 words

“I’m going to ask you something,” Phil says and then pauses and doesn’t ask Clint anything at all. “Yeah?” Clint asks, leaning forward and resting his elbows on the table. “Is it kinky?” It isn’t, obviously; Phil never has a problem suggesting anything when it comes to sex. Phil shakes his head. He looks up, catching and holding Clint’s eyes. Clint doesn’t make any more smartass comments. “Marry me?” Phil asks.

First read in 2012. It's still so lovely.

Disclosures by gqgqqt

MCU | Clint/Coulson | Teen | 67,900 words

Phil Coulson is miserable, distrusted by most of SHIELD, and still doesn't remember why. It's only going to get worse before it gets better.

(2012) I didn't think I was going to like this, this time around. But nope. Still perfect.

Quriosity by dr_girlfriend

James Bond | Bond/Q | Explicit | 79,900 words

Bond finds himself increasingly curious about his enigmatic Quartermaster.

(2014) Very very good and pretty much the prototype of what I want out of the bond/q fandom.

Out of the Dead Land (orphaned on ao3)

MCU | Bucky/Steve | Mature | 62,700 words

Someone is building machines that look and act like people. Meanwhile, the Winter Soldier tries to be Bucky Barnes.

(2014) Brilliant H/C

All the Rules to Break by foxxcub

Inception | Arthur/Eames | Explicit | 27,700 words

A notorious serial killer returns after a three-year hiatus, reminding Detective Arthur Moss of the infamous case he couldn't close. But when the FBI becomes involved, Arthur is forced to work side-by-side once again with Special Agent Daniel Eames, a man who knows Arthur better than Arthur himself will ever admit. Both men must confront their past and heal old wounds in order to bring a psychopath to justice.

(2011) I love this AU. Always have, always will.

I've Got Nothing To Do Today But Smile (The Only Living Boy in New York) by gyzym

Inception | Arthur/Eames | Teen | 19,860 words

Arthur's a corporate lawyer, Eames owns the coffee shop across the street, and all good love stories start with a quadruple shot latte.

(2011) Another AU I will love forever. Still amazing.

Scattered Pieces of My Mind (orphaned on ao3)

Hockey RPF | Kane/Toews | Teen | 22,580 words

After one scandal too many, Patrick Kane gets traded. Eventually it stops being the worst thing that's ever happened to him.

(2014) And this here is the prototype for my favorite H/C scenario. I feel like this rec list may be giving a bit too much away on my state of mind these days.

we were even after all, even in enmity (orphaned on ao3)

Hockey RPF | Kane/Toews | Mature | 60,000 words

“Jonathan,” Q says solemly. Something in his tone gives Jonny pause. He sits up straighter, waiting for the end of the sentence. “I regret to inform you that you’ve been traded to the St. Louis Blues. It’s been an honor and a pleasure working with you the past few years, and you will be sorely missed. Please clean out your locker before you leave today.” “That’s what Kaner said in your meeting?” Jonny asks, feeling numb. “That’s why it took so long? He was convincing you to trade me?”

(2014) Yup, you guessed it. H/C, angst, whump. Perfection.

Shelter by harriet_vane

Social Network RPF | Jesse/Andrew | Teen | 63,500 words

From the kinkmeme prompt: Some sort of AU vaguely based on Shelter! For whatever reason, Jesse has to take care of Hallie and give up his dream of being an actor. He ends up working in a dead end job when former, now successful friend (Andrew) returns home. They fall in love, etc, only Jesse can't go away with him because he has a responsibility to his family. CUE ANGST.

(2011) I remembered the bare bones of this story and thought I probably wouldn't enjoy it as much now... but it turned out to be excellent. Really cute AU.

here comes the sun by oflights

Social Network | Mark/Eduardo | Explicit | 56,600 words

This is a story about growing up, sad 70's rock songs, too much hair gel, "Maxwell's Silver Hammer", a baby with curly hair, a Geiger counter, a dog that isn't named Max, the Chicken Dance, Cheerios, pepper-spray, drugs, sex, and a stuffed chicken named Cluckerberg, nicknamed Cluck. or: Mark raises Sean's accidental baby, and I write the fluffiest thing ever.

(2011) And then there's this one... I mean, who'd want to read about Mark Zuckerberg in 2021, right? I do apparently. This story still gets five huge stars from me, implausible setup and all. It's endearing, romantic, super cute.

All The Stars And Bleeding Hearts by torakowalski

Social Network RPF | Jesse/Andrew | Explicit | 40,470 words

Notting Hill AU. In which Jesse runs a bookstore, Andrew is a famous film star and they’re both faily dorks in love.

(2011) Beautifully done!

and how many years I've missed you by estrella30

One Direction RPF | Harry/Nick | Explicit | 17,900 words

“So my god, Nick,” Harry folds himself down into a chair, his long legs splaying out under the table. His foot knocks into Nick’s and Nick kicks him back reflexively, his body remembering how to act around Harry even after all this time. “This is bloody crazy,” Harry shakes his head. “It’s been ages, yeah? It’s got to be like, what, five years or something?” Seven, Nick thinks to himself. You were just nineteen and I was twenty eight and it was seven years ago, not five. or, the one where Harry and Nick haven't seen each other or been in touch in seven years and then they meet up and things happen

(2014) More angst. Frickin' beautiful.

[ageofevermore]

Magic In The Parks

SUMMARY — and maybe he was meant to find love in the happiest place on earth, or maybe they were just strangers in the same room at the same time

WORD COUNT — 5.2k

NOTE — happy halloween, i’ve been working on this for nearly an entire month. it’s a bit rough around the edges, but i’m super proud of it!

ADD YOURSELF TO MY TAGLIST

───── ･ ｡ﾟ☆ﾟ: *. ☽ .* : ☆ﾟ. ─────

The air is sweeter in Florida, warmer too. Tom’s got his arms full of bags, and his hand held tightly, but he still takes a minute to tilt his chin upwards and inhale the tropical scent of Orlando. He’s spent a lot of time in the southern states of the east coast, but he’s thankful to be in company this trip. The black adidas bag on his shoulder is heavy, but valuable. He can feel the sharp plastic of a crown poking his back through the padding; one of many she insisted on bringing, and his smile widens.

Traveling with a toddler is difficult, and Tom much rather prefers the time of his parental experience where Posie wasn’t mobile. She’s all over the place now, wanting to see and understand the inner workings of everything mechanical. He’s sure he’s answered the question of how a plane flies six times within the last few hours, but he enjoys it. He enjoys everything about fatherhood; even single fatherhood. 

Posie’s been buzzing about this trip for weeks, ever since Tom told her they’d get to meet all of her favorite princesses during the week. He’s seen every movie thrice over, confidently quoting The Princess and The Frog in his sleep he’s sure. It was the requested theme of her third birthday party, and he has his suspicions that her fourth will be all the same in a couple of months. 

“Hold my hand please, darling.” He insists when she pulls away, not wanting to lose his tiny companion in Terminal C of Orlando International. She’s always been a bit of a wanderer, but her curiosity’s grown since landing in Orlando and spotting a plethora of poorly hidden Mickeys. “Thank you.” 

His teams arranged for a driver to escort them to the resort, n0t wanting to risk public transportation. Somehow he’s managed to go unrecognized, but he doesn’t want to leave anything to chance. Posie’s swinging his hand now, her small fingers twisted into his. The feel of her is soft, dainty, innocent even. It’s everything Tom misses when he lays her to bed at night and goes about the rest of his evening without her company. She’s his best mate, and has been since the day she was born.

The black SUV Tom’s put in order pulls around into the terminal, a driver dressed in a black and white suit coming to help load the bags into the boot of the car. Tom’s made a plethora of big moves this trip, like traveling without personal security, and not bringing a car seat for Posie. He’s almost regretting it now, but it wasn’t worth the bulk and invasion. He likes this quality time, something he doesn’t get much of with the amount of active projects he’s signed onto. 

“We’re gonna go see the castle, right, Daddy?” Her small sentences are full of glee, and she’s bouncing excitedly on the tips of her toes. Tom scoops her up onto his hip, handing off the black Adidas bag when the driver, a middle aged man named Phil, asks if he wants it in the back as well. 

“Thank you,” He nods towards Phil, the asian-american nodding as gleefully as he could show behind the thick black mask. “Yeah, we’re gonna see the castle, and all the princesses. What are you gonna sing when you see Rapunzel?” Tom asks. 

Posie doesn’t have to think for a single minute, smiling as she begins the motions of delicately brushing another's hair. “Flower gleam and glow, let your power shine, make the clocks reverse, Daddy, you sing the rest.” Her young voice is innocent as she struggles over syllables, maiming almost every other word in the song, but Tom understands it, and his heart swells with adoration. 

“Bring back what once was mine. Heal what has been hurt, change the fates design. Save what has been lost, bring back what once was mine. Go ‘head, finish it, love,” Tom encourages, laughing at the shy blush that spreads across Posie’s neck. She presses her cheek into his arm, grabbing his fingers in her tiny fist with uncertainty. “We’ll do it together, yeah? Ready?” He waits for her to nod before they both softly finish the rhyme Mother Gothel makes Rapunzel sing nightly, “What once was mine.” 

“Good job, Daddy.” Posie encourages, laughing when the button of her nose is pressed and Tom smooths his hand over her head. She’s got flyaways going in every direction, the once cute ponytail he assembled at the crown of her head having slipped down towards her neck with all of her excited activities. She looks a mess, but the sight makes his heart grow fonder. 

“Who’s your favorite?” The driver asks, his friendly question opening the shy toddler up. Her lips split, and her looks between Tom and Phil to make sure it’s okay before continuing.

Her voice comes out like a soft symphony, and shyly her English accent carries through the car. “Tiana.”

“I quite like Mulan.” Tom exclaims, poking his finger into Posie’s side. She squirms away from his touch, a laugh pouring from her belly as she throws her head backwards. “Reckon I could be Mushu, what do you think, mate?” Tom asks Phil, the man under question shaking his head with a laugh. His grin is wide beneath his mask, having been ages since he’s heard a child laugh so wholeheartedly. 

“I think Mushu fits perfectly, sir.” 

-

Posie’s pressed into Tom’s side, sound asleep for the second time with the hem of his Star Wars shirt in her fist. Tom’s watching her blissfully, occasionally looking down at his phone to straighten out the last of their reservations, but for the most part, he’s devoted to her simple innocence. He had watched her sleep on the plane too, not remembering the last time he had the time to just sit beside her and admire what she’s becoming. 

“I miss that age.” Phil speaks softly. He’s kept quiet for a while, letting Tom just absorb the sweet cuddles he’s being offered, but he couldn’t let the father slip by without sympathizing about just how fast they grow up. “I have two at home.” 

“Goes by in a blink, doesn’t it, mate.” Tom smooths his hand over Posie’s head once more, breathing in deeply to settle the emotions brawling in his heart. 

-

Tom’s holding her on his hip again, coaxing sleep out of her eyes with the pad of his abused thumb. His fingers and palms are rough from years of stunt work with Sony and Marvel, but he still finds a way to make his touches gentle and sweet for her. His precautions surfaced from the first time he held her, just minutes after her delivery, and his pinky scratched the pink of her gentle cheek. He never wanted to feel that bottomless guilt and sorrow again. 

Posie’s fighting his gentle approach though, emitting soft whines from around her thumb as she poutily shoves her face into the crook of his neck. She’s been asleep for nearly an hour, which is longer than she naps at home, but Tom knows all too well how draining travel can be. They've only just been escorted into their hotel suite, and Tom wishes he had the patience to let her sleep until her sweet little heart's content, but he’s just about buzzing to get everything settled and begin the true festivities of their short trip. A week is not nearly enough time at the happiest place on earth. 

“Come on, darling.” He coos, bringing a hand down the small of her back and patting her bum. She’s as much of an easy riser as Paddy is, though where Paddy’s irritable, Posie’s cuddly. “Don’t you want to go see the pretty castle, love?” 

Posie lifted her head from Tom’s shoulder, petting the bridge of his nose sleepily. “Wanna go.” She mumbles, “Put my Tiana dress on.” 

Tom laughs, lowering her onto the hotel bed. She’s heavy in his embrace still, still mesmerized by sleep, but her eyes are open and buzzing with excitement. She traces the bag of costumes laying by the door, and her little fingers jet out in persistence. He detaches her arms from around his neck, kissing her little knuckles sweetly, before asking her to sit down so she doesn’t fall. She’s not the most coordinated little, and he’s not willing to risk the chance of her getting hurt. 

“Which one do you want, Posie? Yellow or Green?” Tom asks, turning around to look at his daughter. She’s on her feet again, reaching high above the headboard. Her fingers are just barely able to brush across the portrait of the Pixar characters, but she’s absolutely bustling with glee. “On your bottom, please.” Tom advises. He pulls the yellow dress from the bag, deciding against the green dress for the first night. 

Posie owns every princess dress ever, and in multiple variations. There’s about four Cinderella dresses shoved into the adidas backpack, Tom’s just barely managed to convince her to pack half of the collection, though he knows they’ll leave with at least another three in his suitcase when she lays her eyes on the gift shops collection, not to mention after the trip to bippity boppity boutique; which he’s already made a reservation for. He’s excited for the struggle though, because he knows it will have meant that Posie had fun. 

She mindlessly lifted her arms up when Tom came back over towards the bed, and he happily pulled her shirt from her body. At the moment, he couldn’t care for keeping the suite in a tidy order, flicking the shirt across the room, which prompted giggles from Posie who watched wide eyed excitement. “Reckon we can make it a bit messy, huh?” Tom teased, poking at the flesh of her pudgy belly. She’s losing the baby weight more and more every day, becoming almost unrecognizable in comparison to the infant decorating his home screen. It’s a bittersweet realization to have, and Tom feels as though he has the same thought every time she laughs. 

“Go ahead, angel. Throw them.” He encourages after standing her up on the bed and helping her out of her cotton shorts. Posie grins mischievously, doing as she was prompted and releasing the black shorts into the air. They don’t make it any farther then Tom’s shadow, but her head is still thrown back in exquisite belly laughs. 

Tom grins, holding the dress over her head and sliding her arms through the small cuffs carefully. She’s always hated being dressed, whether it was the actual act of putting clothes on, or continuing to wear them. She’s his little wild card, but he can’t help but melt at the sight of her in Tiana’s working uniform. 

“You look so pretty, my baby.” He coos, laying her down on the bed and kissing all over her face. Posie’s squeals and giggles are blissful, her small little fingers trying to push Tom’s scruffy chin away from her cheeks and necks. 

In retaliation, she digs her fingers into his sides, trying to mess with him in the same way he’s instigating her. Tom’s grin in splitting, mocking surprise as he pulls away from Posie quickly to glimmer with enjoyment and love. 

“Are you tickling me, Posie Grace?” Tom retorts, hands planted on the dips of his hips. Posie grinned, standing from the bed and leaping into her father's embrace with gleeful vigor and giggles. Tom’s never heard Posie laugh so much in her entire life.  

He’s damn near certain that his cheeks are going to hurt after their week long escapade, but he’s looking forward to the dull ache in his jaw. It’s been awhile since things have been so easy, and he knows that it won't last even a day past november second, but he’s cherishing it while he has it. He doesn’t ever want to worry about Posie being taken away, but with a growing argument from his daughter's maternal side, he’s not so sure his multiple day work week and constant travel looks appealing in court. 

“Ready, Princess Posie?” Tom asks, shifting Posie higher on his hip as he advanced towards the suites door. She nodded happily, fisting the neckline of his shirt between clammy fingers. She always did get clammy when she was feeling too much of something, a dead giveaway to Tom and anyone else that knew Posie Holland. “It’s gonna be so fun, right?” He pries gently, hoping to settle some of the overwhelming excitement and uncertainty she’s feeling. 

“Yeah!” She babbles shyly, watching her father grab two face masks and slip the smaller one around her ears and over her nose. She wiggles her lips for a minute before accepting the fate of the feeling. 

“We’ve gotta keep this on, remember?” He preaches, kissing Posie’s temple when she nods in confirmation. The entire situation isn’t ideal; Tom never thought he’d be taking Posie to Disneyworld for Halloween in the middle of a global pandemic, but he’s made sure to adhere to all the precautions and plan as strategically as he’s able. He wants to have fun, but he needs her to be kept safe and healthy. “Let’s roll, princess.” 

-

“Mickey’s over your nose, please.” Tom speaks softly. Posie’s been chattering up a storm about their recent trip around the Dumbo ride, and in her excitement the mask had slipped down. She giggles, clumsily pulling it back up and flashing a wide grin at her father. “Cheeky.” He muses, leaning up against the railing to his left and looking down at the little girl who's all his own. Her face is flush, a blush rising up her neck and around her ears from the heat, and flyaways from her ponytail have begun to frame her face. “Who are we going to see first, hum? How about Ariel, I quite like her.” 

Posie leans into Tom’s legs, wrapping her arms around him tightly. She’s completely overjoyed, but she’s shied away from multiple attractions, and he thinks the décor might be a little more intimidating then she’s letting on. 

“I wanna see Anna!” She beams, and Tom laughs, although not surprised. Her list of favorite princesses is endless, and every minute somebody else gets added higher onto the list. “No! I wanna see Rapunzel, can we see Rapunzel?” 

Tom’s thankful she changed her mind before he had to explain that Anna was located in an entirely different park, and that they definitely wouldn’t make it there by the end of the day. Posie grinned when the group of three ahead of them was escorted into the building, making her and Tom the head of the queue. 

“Do you think Tiana’s gonna like my dress?” Posie grinned shyly, fingering the yellow material covering her little legs. 

Tom nods in confirmation, giving her a look once over just to boost her confidence. “I think she’s going to love it, mate.” He smiles when Posie gets flushed, digging the button of her slim shaped nose into the denim of his jeans. “Do you think Cinderella will like my crown?” 

Posie pulled away enough to check the silver crown on top of her father's head, she pulled her hand up to her already covered mouth, and threw her head back in blissful laughter. She’d found it incredibly hilarious when Tom bought them matching crowns to begin with, she hadn’t even realized he had stuck the silver accessory through messy strands of hair on his head. 

Neither Posie or Tom has time to address the crown, because a Disney employee is smiling kindly at them, and asking them to follow the arrows into the princess greeting space. That brings another level of timidness onto Posie, as she clings to her father's hand and makes sure she walks behind his every step. She’s testing the waters. 

“Look at that, mate.” Tom points out Rapunzel in the line of princesses. She’s first followed by Cinderella, Tiana, and Belle, all smiling easily. Tom’s sure Posie’s eyes couldn’t have grown any wider at the sight and she completely freezes up, raising her arms and pinching her fingers to her palms with a pale flush. The redness that had once been spreading over her body completely replaced by nervousness. 

Tom lifts her onto his hip, a hand cradling the back of her head when she digs her face into his shoulder. Her fingers twist into the hair on the nape of his neck, while she looks Rapunzel over with uncertainty. She’s never been a fan of character costumes, Tom found that out at the Spiderman; Far From Home premier, but he hadn’t expected that shyness to carry over into princess costumes, especially considering she all but lives in her own selection. 

“Hello, Princess.” Rapunzel sings sweetly, her golden locks of hair twisting down her back as she flutters her fingers in Posie’s direction. The purple lace mask she’s wearing is similar to the pattern on the chest of her corset, just like every princess down the lines whose face mask matches their iconic costume. 

The interaction is the same down the line. Posie clings to Tom looking mortified as they pose for pictures at a safe distance, and make brief one-sided conversation, then move on to the next princess waiting. They’re at the end of the line now, and Tom’s growing a bit tired of making conversation with the princesses. They’ve all been incredibly sweet, but he’s not interested in the circular pattern Cinderella uses to mop the floors of her step-mothers house.

“Well, hello there, Princess! What’s your name?” Belle chirped, hands clasping the yellow silk of her heavy ball gown. 

Tom’s about to answer for himself and Posie again, but Posie’s shy wave distracts him. He can feel her skin getting warmer beneath his hands, but that doesn’t silence her this time. A shy frown pulls at her lips, but she looks Belle over with something similar to...trust? 

“Posie.” She whispers, before a shy smile breaks her lips and for the first time since entering the entertainment hall she looks comfortable. 

“That’s a pretty name Princess Posie! What’s your Prince’s name?” Belle asked, flowery hand movements getting a giggle from Posie’s chest. Tom can see the actor's heart nearly melt behind her eyes at the sound, and he chuckles to himself while Posie answers. 

“He’s Spiderman, not a Prince, silly.” Posie whispers, knowing she isn’t meant to be blabbering about Tom’s profession while they’re away on vacation. It’s quiet enough that the other three princesses, who are still heavily in character, don’t hear, but he still looks Belle over with worry that she’ll leak the news to the media. 

He’s made sure to dress down, avoid anything too revealing, and ditch certain aspects of his outfit that are an official identity giveaway to his following. His rolex is sitting in a safe back at the hotel room, his mask is black with a simple mickey design, and he’s instead of his preferred pair of grey sweats, or blue jeans, he’s in black Adidas joggers that he borrowed from Harrison. 

“Superhero, huh?” Belle muses softly, “Well, we better keep it a secret then. We can’t have everyone knowing, right Princess?”  

Posie lifts her head from Tom’s shoulder, smiling widely at the actor. Tom listens constantly as they talk for a few minutes, Posie grows more and more animated with every half sentence ‘Belle’ speaks and it brings back the wave of guilt he’s been surfing for weeks. His specific profession as portraying the live action version of Spiderman could have ruined all of this magic for Posie, it still has the possibility of ruining it for her when she gets to understand what an actor really is. She can only grasp that Daddy plays dress up when he goes to work, but when she realizes that Daddy is Spiderman, and without him there is no Peter Parker in Paris, he’s heartbroken thinking of everything else that ruins. Santa Claus, Disney World, cartoons. He only hopes he has a few more years of this easily achieved joy, before he single handedly ruins the magic. 

“Alright, it’s time to go, Princess Posie.” Tom snaps from his trance after they pose for another socially distanced picture, He’s not sure how ten minutes escaped him so quickly, but in the time that he’s been dreading Posie growing up, she’s found a life long friend in the professional princess actor. 

Belle sings her goodbye to Posie, but when he eyes catches Tom’s she nods, a silent promise that his secret is safe with her. 

- 

Posie’s warmed up to the characters a bit more since their first night at the Parks. She’s not overly excited about meeting them personally, but in close passing she’s bright with awe. The parks had secretly scheduled parades throughout the day, a method of trying to prevent large crowds from forming, but Tom was lucky enough to be in the know of them the floats would pass down main street. He had taken Posie to a few of them, and each time she warmed further to the idea of the Princesses and Princes...she still wasn’t exactly fond of the full body costumes though. 

Tom laughed gently as she plowed into his legs. It was their last full day in the most magical place on earth, and Tom had pulled out all the stops. He had scheduled another reservation at the salon inside the castle after hearing all about it until Posie fell asleep on his chest, a smile and glitter painting her face, and had booked them a reservation at the infamous character dinner.  

At the bippity boppity boutique, he wasn’t surprised that she had requested Belle again, and had gleamed with the same excitement despite the repetition. He was just happy he somehow convinced her to choose a different dress, instead of the same heavy and yellow one. She was spinning around his legs, absolutely bursting with joy. Her hair was tied into a half up half down style, and the bun on the crown of her head was framed by a small silver crown and a dusting of glitter. As the lighting in the waiting area dims, signaling the arrival of Prince Charming who is set to open the doors at six o’clock sharp, Tom catches a sparkle of blue shadow across her eyelids. He doesn’t know where his baby went, but somehow she’s gone. 

Posie’s clinging to her Belle themed pumpkin basket and wand, clicking together the heels of her clear blue heels. There’s a picture of Belle on the front of them, similar to the seven pairs she has at home for every other princess and fairy. Tom’s shocked she hasn’t branched into the Prince outfits yet, though he much rather prefers the days when he comes home from set, and her little body is dressed in his button downs and blazers, absolutely knocked out in the center of his bed like a starfish. 

“I’m gonna get sweets for Hazza!” Posie grins, fiddling with the plastic handle of the bucket. “And some for Paddy and Harry, but Sammy ate mine last time, so he doesn’t get any. Right, Daddy? Sammy’s gotta get his own.” 

“I think that sounds like a wonderful idea, love.” Tom laughs softly, remembering the day his brother had been caught eating the halloween candy Posie worked tirelessly to collect. “Bet they’re gonna love it.” 

Posie goes on about the candy she wants to get each of the boys as Tom watches for the start of the small ceremony. The dinners are a small gathering, safe with covid regulations, and he can’t help but feel thankful that it’s a smaller audience. He knows it’s almost impossible to go unnoticed now, but he’s reserved a corner space to hopefully stay unnoticed. 

“Whose that, Pose?” Tom grins, pointing out Prince Charming as he rounds the corner. He’s got his arms folded behind his back, white suit with gold embellishments sparkling in the lights of the dinning hall lobby. 

“He looks like Haz!” She giggles, and Tom can’t deny that the actor does resemble his best friend a bit eerily. His eyes are a piercing blue, hair the same dirty shade, the only difference Tom can spot is the slim of his nose which is wider than Harrisons. 

“Do you reckon Haz should be a prince with you, love?” Tom asks, knowing that if he puts an idea into Posie’s head, Harrison has no chance of saying no. His best friends the worst with following Posie’s every desire. 

“He can be the Beast! I wanna be Belle.” Posie beams at the idea, “He can borrow my teddy, but he has to give it back.” 

“Why don’t we get him his own, yeah? I think he’d like his own teddy.” 

“And we can get Tessa a teddy, right? She likes watching Rapunzel with me! Can we get her a Pascal?” 

“Absolutely.” Tom agrees, just as Prince Charming cuts the red ribbon tying the dining hall doors together. The pair of them are ushered into the space a few seconds afterwards, and shown to their secluded table in the corner beside a bouquet of yellow roses.

Tom helps Posie into her seat beside his, eyes filling with tears for a reason he can’t name. It’s the same empty feeling in his stomach that he’s experienced since landing in Florida. It’s his baby girl growing up and not needing him for every small thing anymore. It’s her little personality and sweet soul, her gentle honey eyes and adoration for cuddles and family. He couldn’t be prouder of the little lady he’s raising, but he can’t help but wonder if he’s doing it right. 

He pulls out his phone, taking what has to be the millionth picture this week. Posie grins, her eyes showing specs of gold from the invasion of the flash. The blue dress on her body brings out the tan complexion of her skin, and Tom can’t help but think of how angelic her little life is. 

“I wanna take your picture!” She grins, reaching for his phone. Tom hands it over, pulling a large smile even though the expression is still hidden behind his mask. His eyes squint from the sheer tension of his tightly pulled lips, and Posie’s giggling so much her hands are shaking and the picture comes out blurry, but Tom loves it anyways. 

“Awesome job, peanut.” He smooths a hand over her head when she hands his phone back, tired eyes blinking at him despite the expression of excitement she’s still wearing. She’s been on a sugar high since takeoff back home, and Tom’s anticipating the crash once they get back home to their own beds and routine. 

After Tom orders their meals and drinks, the gentle halloween music kicks up slightly and the princesses and characters start to make their way around the venue. Posie tenses when she sees Mickey Mouse walk down the stairs, his halloween outfit adding to her uncertainty. Tom laughs gently at her reaction, taking her mask off of the table and pocketing it so it doesn’t fall or get misplaced. 

Mickey isn’t the first character to come over, it’s Tinkerbell, and after she drops some candy into Posie’s bucket, she makes flowery conversation before moving along to another table of children. Posie’s starting to enjoy herself by the time their food is served, forking a pile of cheesy noodles into her mouth between smiles and laughs. They’ve been visited by Jasmine, Elsa, and Prince Charming since Tinkerbell’s stop, but she’s ranting about wanting to see Belle. The candy bucket is nearly halfway full, and Tom knows there's going to be a fight about how much she’s allowed to eat before bed tonight. He’s prepared to lose and let her have it all, but he figures the responsible thing to do is break it up and make it last. 

Posie’s deep into a chocolate sunday by time Belle comes into view, and Tom’s quick to grab his camera when he sees the yellow dress get closer and closer. Posie’s face is smeared in chocolate ice cream and whipped cream, which is what Tom expected when he ordered her the treat in the first place. He’s not sure what it is about little ones and frozen treats, but even an ice lolly has her skin stained for hours. 

Her eyes grow wide when she realizes Belle’s standing at the foot of their table, hands gently clasped around the handle of an identical sweets basket. 

“Princess Posie!” Belle grins in delight, letting a few extra pieces of chocolate fall into Posie’s bin. She sends a wink towards the little girl, and Posie breaks into a sweet giggle. Tom watches the actor have the same look of adoration in her eyes at the sound, and he can’t help but notice the subtle tint of yellow around her pupils. 

A conversation about dresses and matching baskets breaks out, and Tom’s sure that Belle has overstayed her assigned time per table, but he doesn’t say anything. He quite likes hearing her and Posie chat about make believe and magic. 

When the actor finally does decide it’s best if she carries on, Tom makes sure to motion her closer. “What’s your name?” He has all intention of putting in a word with Disney management about how excellent she is, but selfishly he wants to test it on the tip of his tongue. 

“Y/N.” 

- 

The air is cold and bitter. Posie’s passed out on Tom’s shoulder, little arms wrapped around his neck and legs hanging limply at his sides. He’s waiting for Harry to pick the both of them up, wanting to get home and fall into his own bed with Tessa and Posie. 

His baby girl’s only just fallen asleep, her eyes rimmed red from crying throughout the entirety of the flight. She’s coming down with a fever from all the travel, and he’s sure the upset of leaving the warmth and magic of the parks has something to do with it.

She’s still wearing her yellow Belle dress, though her little feet are bare and cold because the princess shoes she insisted on wearing kept slipping off of her toes as Tom carried her through baggage claim. It’s the same as how this entire trip started. He can feel crowns, wands, and plastic shoes poking him through his backpack, and he’s surrounded by luggage and gift bags that giveaway where they had spent Halloween week. 

When Harrison pulls the car around, Tom is thankful that the seat warmers and heat are already on, and Posie’s car seat is buckled into place. Harrison shivers when he steps into the brutal cold to help Tom put all the bags into the backseat and trunk, cooing at the sight of Posie. She’s sunkissed, freckles dusting her cheeks and a flush running up her neck and ears. 

“How was it, mate?” 

Tom grins, thinking back to the sweet girl whose name sounds heavenly on the tip of his tongue. As he buckles Posie into her carseat, gently shushing her whimpers when he gets her arms through the chest straps, he tugs off his sweatshirt and puts it over her body like a blanket, before he turns his head to look Harrison over. 

“Magical.” 

[silksandcravats]

Minor Disagreements

Summary: A short piece in which Flip cannot possibly understand why you might want to live in a van...

masterlist

warnings: explicit language, female reader, arguement, brief reference to sex

You and Flip were pretty different people, you’d known this since the beginning when you started dating. You were free-spirited and adventurous and Flip was down on the ground, head in the real world with his grown-up job and pessimistic realistic worldview. The two of you should mix about as well as oil and water, but for whatever reason, that wasn’t the case. Somehow you seemed to compliment each other. 

You made his life exciting, you helped him explore his passions, You helped him get the full human experience. And he kept you from drifting off the edge. He shoved just enough routine in your life to keep you sane, and provided you a safe place you could run back too when “living the dream” fell through. You made life worth living and he made sure he was around to pick you up when you reached too far and got knocked down. 

It really was all sunshine and rainbows between the two of you, except of course for the times when it wasn’t...

“You’re out of your damn mind.”

“Oh come on honey think about it! The world is so big! I could see so much of it!” You gushed, you felt a tinge of sadness that your excitement wasn’t being met by your boyfriend.

“No, absolutely not,” he stated firmly.

“I wasn’t asking” you reply, feeling your blood begin to boil at his outright dismissive attitude.

“Don’t care, you’re not living in a fucking van, forget it.”

“You’re not even hearing me out Flip!” you pushed.

“You’re right, I’m not.” his response was entirely unapologetic. 

“I am a grown woman Phillip, I can do whatever I want,” you snap.

“You sure can honey, but if you think for a second I’m gonna let you lock yourself in a box parked out in the open, where anyone who knows how to pick a car lock can get their hands on you-” his anger was quickly rising to match yours.

“It’s perfectly safe! Rosemary does it,” you cut him off.

“Like fuck it is,” he scoffed.

“What are you going to physically stop me?”

“Yes.” He spit it out, letting out a short bitter laugh as if it was obvious.

“You can’t stop me.”

“I will if I have to dearest!” He spit, the word “dearest” came out dripping with sarcasm. He was mocking you.

“I’ll leave you!” It was too far, you knew it was the moment it left your mouth, but you were so pissed at him for telling you what to do that you couldn’t take it back. You glared at him, waiting for his response, but he held back, instead throwing his hands up and walking out of the room.

It would be nice to say that you and Flip were the kind of couple who never went to bed angry with each other, but that wasn’t true. You were at a stage in your relationship where you spent most weekends over at his place. He had a busy work week and he didn’t always get to see you during the weekdays so it was your way of making sure you always got to see each other. It was a time both of you always cherished and looked forward to, and you both felt guilty for letting your special time together go to waste. 

But neither of you could just swallow your pride and spit out an apology so you fell asleep, backs towards each other. There was no bedtime kiss, no goodnight bids. For the first time in as long as you could remember, you fell asleep on a Saturday night outside of Flip’s arms, and you both had a long, miserable night because of it.

And if you thought the guilt you had felt the night before was bad, it was quickly outshone by the deep sinking feeling in the pit of your stomach when you woke up Sunday morning.

The other side of the bed was cold and empty. It only makes sense that your Sunday morning ritual of being showered in sweet soft little pecks and being tugged impossibly closer against a big warm chest, and maybe a round or two of lazy sweet sex if you hadn’t gotten enough of each other the night before was forgone too. 

You trudged down the stairs, trying to decide what to do about your heavy conscience. Threatening a breakup to get him to shut up was a low move, and he probably knew you didn’t mean it but that didn’t make it any less cruel. Flip’s job showed him the worst in this world and you knew he’d do anything to keep you safe. You still wanted that van life though.

When you arrived downstairs you found the house was empty, a little note sat on the counter. There, in Flip’s handwriting, sat a short message that told you everything you need to know.

Ran out to grab something, be back soon. I love you.

He couldn’t be too made then, you figured to yourself as you turned around to face his kitchen. You wanted to worm your way back into his heart and make things right, and you had a pretty good idea of how to get there.

30 minutes later the smell of something sweet filled the kitchen as you pulled a rack of banana nut muffins out of the oven. It was a recipe you knew you were good at, and Flip was a sucker for them. You turned off the oven, and decided to let them sit in the tray for a bit before you pulled them out of the tin.

You could swear he had some kind of 5th sense for things like this, because no sooner than you had finished did Flip come in through the front door. He pulled it shut behind him, following his nose through the house where he was sure to find whatever you had been baking, and you of course. He stepped into the kitchen cautiously, searching for clues to pick up your mood like the detective he is.

“I made you muffins.” You spoke first, your voice coming out almost shy. Your tone tugged at his heartstrings. He’d just come in to apologise to you and here you were baking to make things up to him.

“I’m sorry,” he responds, moving through the room towards you pulling you into him, “I was a bossy asshole,” he added what he was sorry for (you taught him that.) His embrace is a welcome change to the past nearly 24 hours of distance between the two of you.

“I’m sorry I threatened you,” You mumbled against him, slipping your arms around his waist to hug him back. “I didn’t mean it.”

“I know honey.” He shushed you, giving you a little squeeze.

“I got you something,” he added after a moment, making you pull back and look at him with curiosity. 

“What is it?”

“Why don’t you come outside and see?” He reached behind you, pulling a still-very-much-hot muffin out of the tin and walking back to the front door, knowing you were close behind. Just before you reached the door he grabbed your wrist, pulling you in front of him and clamping his massive palm over the top of your face covering your eyes. 

You were so excited you nearly squealed. You reached out blindly behind you and grasped him, holding onto him as you stumbled blindly onto the front porch. Suddenly his hand was pulled away, you blink quickly, readjusting to the bright sun that was now about halfway up in the sky.

When your eyes refocused the first thing they landed on was a shiny VW bus in your favorite color parked in the driveway. You gasped in surprise, hands flying up to cover your mouth.

“Phil you didn’t.”

“You can’t live in it,” he stated quickly, still behind you. “But it’s all yours.” He reached around you, waving the key in your face. “And I’ll follow you wherever you wanna go, baby.”

tags: @aloneandsleepless​ @maryforyou​ @emeraldsiren20​

[banana-with-a-bow-tie]

The purpose of this post is not to argue that Biden was, or was not, fraudulently elected in the 2020 president election, but to keep a biblical perspective.

Sources report that 47% of American voters believe that large-scale fraud handed the election to Biden/Harris. Nevertheless, 49% say that fraud was unlikely. A recent NPR/Ipsos poll reported that 67% of Republicans and 11% of Democrats surveyed believe that voter fraud gave Biden election. However, the same survey showed that 19% of Republicans and 85% of Democrats disagree. In either case, dozens of millions of voters believe that there was fraud, and dozens of millions believe that there was not. Numbers do not prove whether or not it happened. The point here is that a huge swath of the US population believes that voter fraud helped usher in the next president.

It’s likely that someone you sing next to in church believes that there is ample evidence of fraud, and is grieved about it. Disdaining them as crazy conspiracists is not the best approach (cf. 1 Cor. 13:4-7, Col. 3:12-17). After all, if you’re a Christian, you believe that a peasant Hebrew crucified as a vile criminal will one day appear in the sky standing on clouds.

So for those who do feel that there was fraud, what would Scripture suggest you do? Even if there was, here are a few considerations from God’s word on the issue.

God is sovereign over unrighteousness

“In the day of prosperity be happy, but in the day of adversity consider— God has made the one as well as the other So that man will not discover anything that will be after him” (Eccles. 7:14).

Though he is not pleased with it, God is sovereign over all sin. If there was fraud, though it would grieve God, he is sovereign over it. God remains in control even in the most wretched times (Lam. 3:37-38). He was sovereign over the wretched rule of Egypt (Exod. 2:23-25), the wicked rule of Israel’s enemies in Judges (Judg. 2:14), the evil of the Assyrian deportation (2 Kings 17), the wickedness of the Babylonian exile (2 Kings 25), the unrighteousness of Herod and the Romans (Matt. 2:15), and he was even sovereign over the treacherous treatment of His own Son: “this Man, delivered over by the predetermined plan and foreknowledge of God, you nailed to a cross by the hands of godless men and put Him to death” (Acts 2:23). Despite all of this evil—often committed by governing authorities—God was never de-sovereigned by it.

“His sovereignty rules over all” (Ps. 103:19).

2. The Lord is still on the throne

No evil agenda, large or small, has ever successfully removed God from his throne. And evil men and nations have tried. They’ve done everything in their power, with satanic and demonic reinforcements, to dethrone God. It hasn’t happened and it never will (Ps. 93:1-5). The permanence of the Lord’s position on the throne of the universe is laughably unthreatened by even the greatest evils of man.

“The kings of the earth take their stand and the rulers take counsel together against the Lord and against His Anointed, saying, 3 ‘Let us tear their fetters apart and cast away their cords from us!’ 4 He who sits in the heavens laughs, the Lord scoffs at them” (Ps. 2:2-4).

The sovereign, supreme rule of the God of the Bible is no more threatened by unrighteous doings and agendas of earthly rulers than his rule is threatened by a cockroach coughing in a Los Angeles sewer.

“The Lord reigns, let the peoples tremble; He is enthroned above the cherubim, let the earth shake!” (Ps. 99:1).

3. God will use unrighteousness for good

One of the ways that God proves he is sovereign is by orchestrating evil for good. We have history to prove that: Joseph’s suffering and saving a nation (Gen. 50:20), Pharaoh housing the messianic nation and its growth, the cross of Jesus Christ, and countless examples since then. Throughout history, God has masterfully moved the evil of man and government to accomplish his purposes, the greatest of which was the cross. Jesus was the recipient of unprecedented civil corruption, and God did a pretty decent job at ensuring that worked out well. We might not see how God orchestrates evil for good this side of heaven, but he’ll take care of it (Rom. 8:28). God is trustworthy.

4. Jesus is still building his church

The church has survived the harshest storms wicked men have to offer. She was birthed into the Roman Empire, who actively opposed her existence. Despite three centuries therein of persecution, her growth continued. Satan and his world have always hated and resisted the church. Even so, she has spread from Israel, to the Roman Empire through the Apostles, and to places like Africa through the Ethiopian Euncuh, the New Hebrides through John Paton, Burma through Adoniram Judson, China through Hudson Taylor, the middle east through Samuel Zwemer, and the list goes on. It’s almost like unrighteous circumstances helps the church thrive. Whatever the case, the church will never die out because Christ builds it (Matt. 16:18).

5. We are still to be about the kingdom of God

Unregenerate enemies attempted several times to distract Nehemiah and God’s people from sticking to the essential task of rebuilding the wall (Neh. 6:4). What they did was wicked. But Nehemiah and crew stuck to the main thing (Neh. 6:3-9).

In these New Covenant days, there are no less enemies and distractions that seek to pull us down from the wall. But we must keep the main thing the main thing. The kingdom of God is that thing. Regardless of what happens, our sovereign God would have us give ourselves completely to involvement in our local churches, godliness, disciple-making, prayer, love, and the word. Let us not get down from the wall (1 Cor. 15:58).

6. God will uphold justice perfectly

God is a perfect, omniscient God. Nothing escapes his notice. He is perfectly good, too, which means evil will not prevail. Regardless what someone appears to get away with, they will stand before God in the judgment (Rom. 12:17-21, Rev. 20:11-15).

7. We are all liars and sinners

An election fraud allegation is to say that lying occurred; massive, consequential lying. Among the list of things God hates, lying is mentioned twice (Prov. 6:16-19). However, people are lying every day; politicians, employers, employees, nobodies, and neighbors. Everyone lies. Lying can no more be separated from humans than their shadow. “Let God be true and every man a liar” (Rom. 3:4). That means we, too, have lied. No one is exempt. God is the only One who has never lied nor will ever.

Our lies may not be as socially consequential as others, but God is the one we stand before. On top of being liars, we are all atrociously unholy before the holy God of the universe (Rom. 3:10-19). This God requires perfection (Matt. 5:48). So, we have nothing to offer God except wickedness and weakness in and of ourselves. Due to our nature and doings, we stand guilty and unacceptable before God. Since we have all sinned against a holy God, an individual who never orchestrated widespread voter fraud deserves to spend eternity in the same hell as someone who did (Rom. 2:1-5).  

8. Jesus died on the cross and rose from the grave

However, God did not leave us to ourselves. Moved by his own compassion on sinners, and not because of anything good or righteous in us, God looked upon us with pity (Rom. 3:10-12, Eph. 1:3-6). Incredibly, our offenses against God in thought, word, nature, and deed did not move him to justly boot us all into hell. No, far from it. He radically humbled himself by joining human nature to himself and was born a baby (Phil. 2:5-7). Though he deserved unceasing worship from every human, Jesus received scorn, hate, and a humiliating and brutal crucifixion (Phil. 2:8). He received all of this on purpose in obedience to his Father’s plan to atone for the sin of his people (John 10:18). Though thoroughly sinful, Jesus so loved his people that he referred to them as, “My sheep” (John 10:26-27). Jesus then rose from the grave victorious, validating his saving work for his sheep. This is a great love, indeed. And it has everything to do with those struggling with the unrighteousness around them: we’ve all sinned, Jesus died and rose for us, and our greatest need has been met.

9. We are to pray

As every human nation and government will be filled with unrighteousness, God now calls his people to pray.

“First of all, then, I urge that entreaties and prayers, petitions and thanksgivings, be made on behalf of all men, 2 for kings and all who are in authority, so that we may lead a tranquil and quiet life in all godliness and dignity” (1 Tim. 2:1-2).

We are to pray for so many encouraging reasons: God hears (Ps. 65:2), God answers and works through prayer (1 Sam. 1:10-11, John 15:7), we are commanded to (1 Tim. 2:1-2), it shows that we are depending on our sovereign God (Luke 11:8), and it is an act of worship whereby God brings glory to himself (Rev. 8:3). If we find ourselves in the rut of angst at times, let us pray. We are to pray and pray and pray, and not lose heart (Luke 11:5-8, 18:1-8; Thess. 5:17).

10. Heaven will be great

Jesus often mentioned that we are to live for our permanent, future, unseen, and eternal home with him and all the redeemed (Matt. 16:24-27). While being present and prayerful, this world is passing, visible, dying, and temporal (1 John 2:17).

In heaven, there will be no voter fraud. They’ll be no voting, for that matter. Why should there be? The forever King will be the single most loving, wise, righteous, just, and perfect Individual in the universe, the blessed Lord Jesus Christ (Isa. 9:6-7, John 1:17, Phil. 2:8-11).

“And the Lord will be king over all the earth; in that day the Lord will be the only one, and His name the only one” (Zech. 14:9).

Of course, more could be said here. As God’s people, we are abundantly furnished with what we need to face these rocky times in a manner pleasing to him. Whatever happens, may the Lord’s church abound in faithfulness and fruitfulness.

[antoni-anxiety]

Tommy is babey, literally tho

3RD PERSON POV- WITH TOMMY

Run. Run. Run was all that could go through his mind right now. Dream was chasing Tommy. Tommy just wanted to get away from there. Dream blew up Logstedshire; Tommy had nothing to lose, apart from his life apparently, which was what he was running for right now. After about 15 minutes of a very close chase between Tommy and Dream, Tommy seemed to outrun the elder, which he was ever so thankful for.

After running so far, Tommy was exhausted and rightfully so; he almost just died. He was so, so cold, he was stuck, surrounded by snow. The boy decided to walk north for a bit further, in hopes that he would find rescue, and just as he hoped, he did. In the distance, he saw a small spruce cottage, with smoke erupting from the chimney, signaling that someone lived there; whoever it was, Tommy prayed that it wasn’t Dream. Uh oh. His vision became dotted and he could barely see, that probably wasn’t good. Right as he reached the front door and was about to knock, his legs collapsed and his mind went blank. He had passed out.

3RD PERSON POV- WITH TECHNO

Technoblade finally had some time to himself. He’s been busy breeding the hounds and organising all day and he hadn’t had much time to relax in a while, and therefore he was now all cozy next to his fireplace, reading some books on greek mythology. He was pretty relaxed, well, until he heard a thud at his front door that is. He contemplated leaving it however his curiosity got the better of him. As he opened his door, he saw someone laying on the front step, ‘There’s no way that they’re older than 16.’ he thought to himself. Now, Techno is a ‘lone wolf’ as some might call it but he wasn’t gonna let some malnourished kid freeze to death on his front step. The man maneuvered the boy from outside onto his small couch; now that he got a better look at the boy, he couldn’t believe his eyes.

This frail, skinny boy was his younger brother. Worry filled Techno’s eyes, even though he pretended that the younger annoyed him ever so much, he had a soft spot for him, the kid could brighten anyone’s day by just saying hello. He had no idea what happened but that kid who was a ray of sunshine suddenly looked as if he hadn’t eaten in weeks and if anyone were to merely touch him, he’d crumble right then and there on the spot. Techno didn’t really know what to do except make Tommy comfortable until he woke up, and once he did, he’d ask him about everything. Techno couldn’t help but wonder what Tommy had gone through before he was there, ofcourse, he knew about Tommy’s exile but if it was like when he was exiled for the first time, Tommy wouldn’t be like this. Techno scoured his mind for what he knew of Tommy’s latest exile; Dream was to look after him, well clearly he wasn’t doing a good job. Oh fuck. Dream must have been abusing his little brother. With that thought, Techno stood up in rage. He was gonna kill that green bastard. That was until he heard stirring and a small whine from the couch. Whipping his head around, he saw Tommy try to sit up and ran over to him. The second that Tommy saw him he immediately started panicking. Techno being the awkward man he is, hugged Tommy in attempt to calm him down. This was gonna be a long night.

3RD PERSON POV- WITH TOMMY

Tommy opened his eyes to be in an unfamiliar place, so of course, his first instinct was to panic. He sat up as quickly as he could and looked around, he saw his older brother approach him. Still in his tired state, his mind was all over the place and all that was going through his mind was ‘POSSIBLE DANGER. RUN’. Before he could process what to do and where to go, Techno had seemingly sensed his anxiety and hugged him tightly. The physical affection seemed to do its job and calm the younger down but it also made him feel loved, something he hadn’t felt in such a long time. The overwhelming emotions made the boy burst into tears, something in his mind seemed to shift, it made him feel younger. However, that was utterly absurd, it must’ve been the stress getting to him. Oh no. Tommy realised what was happening, he almost forgot that he used to do this to cope during all the wars. Of course, nobody knew about it, he’d be caught dead before he let anyone know he regresses; however, his mind was too foggy right now to tell what was happening and therefore reciprocated the hug. Techno was surprisingly a good hugger, and when he finally let go after 5 minutes of a silent hug, only filled with Tommy’s little sniffles, the younger slightly whined at the loss of the calming touch. When Techno looked at Tommy’s eyes, something about them was.. different. They were filled with a somewhat childish innocence which made Techno suddenly feel so protective of him. Tommy seemed to come to his senses and tried to get out of headspace, which he somewhat succeeded at, and immediately apologised to his big brother. ‘I’m s-so sorry Techno- fuck- Imma go, imma go now,’’, Techno was now worried for his baby brother so he couldn’t let him get off the hook so easily. ‘Hey, Toms you’re not going anywhere, you’re clearly ill and I’m worried, tell me what’s going on, hm? You usually wouldn’t burst into tears just like that..’ Techno stated with clear worry in his voice. Tommy was contemplating just lying to Techno but he knew that it wouldn’t work. For someone who barely socialises, Techno is really good at reading people just like open books, so Tommy decided to, reluctantly, tell him about his regression above all of his other issues, seeing as he was already on the verge of regressing again. ‘Uh so about the crying thing.. have you ever heard of fuckin.. Age regression or little space of some sort?’ Tommy just hoped that this wouldn’t go badly. Techno of course, read a lot, so he had the general grasp of what Tommy was talking about, he guessed that his little brother regressed, and he couldn’t lie, just the thought of it was utterly adorable. The piglin hybrid noticed that he hadn’t actually answered Tommy’s question and nodded, ‘So.. you regress? I know a little bit about this stuff, do you wanna be little?’. If he was being completely honest, Tommy had no idea that Techno would be acting this accepting and.. caring? He subconsciously made the choice that Techno was friendly and it was okay to regress around him, and he gave a small nod, on the edge of completely slipping.

3RD PERSON POV- WITH TECHNO

Techno sat himself comfortably next to the younger boy, looking at him in awe; the boy was only 16 and he’d gone through multiple wars and several betrayals, he was so very strong, Techno couldn’t even begin to describe how proud he was. ‘Hey buddy how old are you feeling?’, Techno got a reply of Tommy shying away into his hands and raising 3 fingers. ‘Very small then hm? We should get you into something into a bit more warm, you look quite chilly buddy.’, Tommy made grabby hands at Techno and how could he deny such an adorable request? Techno lifted the skinny boy and brought him to his bedroom, placing him on his bed. Techno once again couldn’t help but get upset once again that his former friend hurt his baby brother; Tommy could have gotten frostbite or hypothermia with the tattered, thin clothes he had been wearing in such a cold biome. Techno finally fished out some joggers and a red hoodie he hadn’t worn in a long time. When he turned back from his closet to his bed, the sight he was met with nearly gave him a heart attack with how pure and adorable it was. Tommy was sat on the bed, knees tucked to his chest and played with his fingers softly, a tiny smile painted on his face. Sadly, this is the happiest Techno had seen Tommy in months, or years even. Techno sat on the bed, next to his younger brother, and helped him get dressed, slowly and carefully, making sure that he didn’t startle the baby. Techno picked Tommy back up and placed him back on the sofa; the two were just cuddling, that is until they heard the front door open. Tommy curled himself into a ball, while Techno protectively placed himself in front of him. The older was slightly relieved to see Phil in the doorframe, however he didn’t know how their father would react to Tommy’s regression, or whether Tommy would even want him to know: Techno could tell that Tommy was very shy and secretive about it. ‘Hey Techno, mate, who’s that?’ Phil asked, clueless about the stress that his sons were in because of his presence. Techno was almost physically sweating with the pressure being put on him, he awkwardly replied ‘Oh uh, hey Phil,’ Techno looked to Tommy who looked terrified. ‘Hey Toms? It’s just Phil, you’re okay..’ Techno whispered to the boy in attempt to calm him down; it seemed to work quite a bit. Unfortunately for the boys, Phil heard what Techno said and jumped at the opportunity to talk to his youngest son, ‘Did you say Tommy? Hello Toms, what’s up?’. Tommy froze and slowly looked up at his dad, tears gathering up in his eyes, Techno noticed and went to comfort his little brother. Phil was beyond confused, and did what anyone would do, ask what was going on. Techno looked to Tommy for approval before telling their dad, to which the boy nodded. With the knowledge Techno had gathered, he tried his best to answer Phil’s question; Phil is a nice guy, he helps anyone who needs it, and so he knew of quite a few coping mechanisms, and this was one of them. The eldest seemed to grasp onto the idea surprisingly quickly, and was immediately helping Techno coddle the younger. Neither of them could deny, the baby was adorable, babbling to himself and chewing on his fingers, which wasn’t exactly sanitary but adorable nonetheless. With the three being fully aware that Ghostbur wouldn’t mind this version of Tommy, and would have fun taking care of Tommy, Techno and Phil couldn’t help but hope that their family could grow close once again. Philza was sure to never let his baby boys go again, they would all rekindle their relationship with each other day by day, and soon were a fully functioning family once again.

[lu-undy]

Un-alone, Chapter 19

Follow this link!

“C’mon Marty, we gotta go.”

The German Shepherd brought the stick he had found back to Mundy and sat down, his eyes pleading. 

“Alright, last throw and then we gotta hit the road otherwise we’ll never get there before the sun sets, ok?”

“Woof!” The dog went to his four paws in a flash and wagged his tail frantically.

“Alright, go!” Mundy threw the stick on the parking lot of the hotel and the dog ran to fetch it. 

“Micky, you’re ready, son?” 

“Yeah, oh, let me help you, Uncle Phil.” Mundy went to his uncle and helped him hop on his seat in the car. 

“Ah, thank you, son, that’s perfect… Thanks.”

“It’s nothin’, here, gimme your cane, I’ll put it behind ya.”

“Micky, you sure you didn’t forget anythin’ in the hotel?” Caroline popped out of reception and into the parking lot.

“I slept in me van, Mum, you should ask Uncle Phil. “

“Phil?”

“Nah, we’re fine, c'mon Carrie!”

“Alright, alright.”

There were another few hours of driving and the landscape changed as the family neared the coast. Mundy followed his mother and uncle driving the car in front of him and soon, Marty became restless on his seat. 

“Recognise the place, mate?”

The dog barked enthusiastically, his tail wagging against the passenger’s seat. He was turning left and right.

“Yeah, you know it, good boy… Oh, that’s where Mum’s parkin’, hm… Guess I'll have to park on the sidewalk… Here… There we go."

A few hours later, all their belongings were moved inside Philip's vacation house. The family had had dinner and Philip was on the sofa, following whatever game was on that night with Marty laying beside him. 

"Thanks for helpin' me with the dishes, Micky." 

Caroline and her son were in the kitchen. She was washing and he was rinsing. 

"You're welcome, Mum."

"I'm sure a few days with the sea breeze will help Phil as much as it will you." She said and Mundy raised an eyebrow. 

"What d'you mean?"

"Y'know…" Caroline cast a glance at the kitchen door and saw that it was open. She quickly rinsed her hands and went to close it before resuming her position next to Mundy. "Your breakup…?" She hesitantly added and Mundy nodded, not because he agreed, but because he remembered. His mother was thinking that the reason why he was avoiding talking about his feelings, was because he had broken up with a woman and his heart was aching...

Well, aching his heart was. 

Not because of a heartbreak, Mundy simply felt like in the end he would be alone because he had nothing to offer, nothing but road trips, hunting animals, people, puttin ghis supposed loved on in danger through that and oh, yeah, a very poor ability to actually talk to people, verbalise what he felt outside of the confines of his own head…

He sighed.

“I don’t wanna pry or anythin’ but uh…” Caroline’s voice pulled the Aussie out of his daydream. “When we were in New Mexico, had you found someone else? I mean, we’ve travelled pretty far and uh…”

“Mum.” Mundy stopped her yet could not look her in the eye. Each time he did, a voice screamed in his head “Liar! Liar! Tell her! Tell her you prefer blokes over sheilas! She doesn’t deserve you lie to her! You’re the worst son she could ever have and it’s all your fault! You’re breaking her heart!”

Mundy screwed his eyes shut and shook his head to shake those thoughts away. 

“No… No I hadn’t, and even if I had, I don’t care.” He put the plate he had in his hand down and left the kitchen. Soon after, Caroline heard the very familiar sound of the van’s engine rumbling away, and sighed. 

The Aussie drove first to let his frustration out, and when it did pass, he started paying attention to his surroundings. It was all new afterall… He realised that it was what all the beach cities must look like: restaurants, nightclubs, theme parks for families. 

Families. 

Huh. Mundy shook his head. He would have loved to have one of his one, someone to go home to, someone to hold, to feel the warmth of. And he had nothing against a sheila and a few kids, he really didn’t. He just had a slight preference for men, that was true; that, and there was the issue with his job too. 

“God damn it…” He sighed.

Being paid to put bullets in things was hard enough on himself, he didn’t want to put that burden on anyone else with him. And sometimes those things weren’t just beasts, they were people too… The truth was that Mundy was a paid killer, a mercenary, jumping from contract to contract. When someone needed some lead in their head, he was called in, and more recently, it was even the officials who called to him for his extraordinary tracking abilities. Mundy could find anyone and anything, as long as it had blood pumping in its veins.

He had thought about quitting, multiple times at that. But then what would he do? Farming with his parents? He was already helping them out from time to time and he didn’t like the idea of taking too much responsibility on the farm. At the end of the day, he didn’t want his parents to think that he wanted to take over, the farm was way too big a responsibility for him, especially alone.

Eventually, Mundy parked somewhere, it was a free parking lot. He lowered his window, just a bit, for some fresh air, and he leaned back on his seat, closing his eyes. He dreamt. He dreamt of a man, the man who will make his days flip upside down, a man who would understand him and somehow, manage to bear him through his muteness, through his silence and hardest of all, through his difficulty to express what he felt. 

Mundy could of course partake in a little exercise of introspection, as he was doing right now; It was practically a compulsory hobby. Anytime he felt low, he would look into himself, as if he didn’t know why, or as if that particular time the answer would be different. Nah, in truth, Mundy just didn’t know what else he could do but think about his misery on his own. The hard part, and the step that he never took was to take everything he knew about himself, about what frustrated him or made him happy, extracting all of that from his insides to bring it outside, for someone to hear. Even his mother was unaware of half the things he was thinking. 

Maybe that was one of the issues he could address as opposed to focusing on dreaming about a man he hadn’t met yet? Maybe that was the “easy” thing to fix and maybe fixing it would bring him some peace?

Mundy opened his eyes and it was night time. He looked around him to see that the city was still busy, even if it was winter now there, the beach still attracted quite a lot of people. 

"Right." He started the engine and headed back home. 

When he entered the house, Marty came to the door to greet him. 

"Hey, Marty, yeah, you're good boy… Oh? Marty, leave my hand alone. Marty-? Alright, alright, I'll follow ya…" 

The German Shepherd led the Aussie to the door of his uncle's bedroom. 

"He must be asleep, Marty, you'll see him tomor-"

"Come in, Micky." Phil said from the inside and Mundy pushed the door. 

"Sorry, Uncle Phil, it's Marty. I don't know why he pulled my hand all the way here."

"It's fine, Micky, I asked him to. Marty, shut the door, boy." 

The dog pushed the door until it clicked shut. 

"He's a very clever dog." Mundy said. 

"Yeah, I got him cause he was too soft to work with us drug sniffin'." 

"Oh, I see." 

"C'mere and have a seat, Micky." Philip was in his bed. He scooted to free some space for Mundy to sit at his side.  “I wanted to have a chat with you, y’know, only men kinda talk…”

The Aussie sighed.

“See? Your Mum’s all worried about ya. Now, I told her you’re one big man and you know what you’re doin’, she shouldn’t meddle in your business.”

"But?" Mundy anticipated. 

"But she told me things, see?"

"What did she tell you?"

"That you got yourself a woman and for some reason, you ain't together anymore, and that's why you're all sad and in your own world." 

"Pfff…" Mundy sighed and shook his head. 

"Now, boy, these things do happen all the time, y'know. It ain't necessarily bad. If anythin', it's better to go each your way if you're not meant together." 

"Yeah, guess you’re right.”

“Believe me, Micky. Besides, young and handsome as you are, I’m sure you’ll find someone else quick enough, eh?”

“Yeah… I wish…”

“Son?” Phil was confused. He expected to see his nephew in a better mood after a little chat, but Mundy looked worse. “What is it…?”

“Nothin’. I’ll let you sleep now, g’night, Uncle Phil.”

And as usual, Mundy disappeared, leaving his uncle confused as to what he was thinking. The Aussie's mind was as impenetrable as Buckingham Palace itself or the White House…

The next morning, Mundy found his mother and his uncle chatting in the kitchen when he woke up. 

"Micky, we were thinkin' of havin' a walk by the beach. Your uncle's physio says it's good for him to walk a bit more now, and we reckon Marty's gonna love it." Caroline said. "You wanna come with us?" 

"Sure. I'll just have some coffee before we go." Mundy took a seat at the breakfast table.

"You wrap your neck in a scarf, yeah?" Caroline poured him some coffee. "It's cold outside. And we should get you a beanie, it's gettin' really cold now." 

"My hat's fine, Mum."

"It's fine until you catch a cold and then who's gonna have to take care of a big baby with a running nose…?" Caroline asked and Mundy smiled. 

"Alright, we'll get some beanies for everyone then." Mundy smiled and took a sip of his coffee. Marty came to the Aussie. "Hey Marty." Mundy patted his head and the dog wagged his tail enthusiastically. 

"Right," Phil said and stood up. "I'll go and put on somethin' decent…"

"I brought your thick winter jacket, Phil, you'll find it in your big bag." Caroline said. 

"Carrie, I'm not yer son!"

"Uncle Phil, don't even try, even Dad can't tell her anythin' about that…" Mundy said. 

"Right, woman, I'll do it your way…" Phil left the kitchen, leaving mother and son alone. 

"I had your dad on the phone yesterday." Caroline said. 

"Oh, how's he doin'?"

"Same old," She answered and finished her coffee. "He's alright, the chickens and geese aren't missin' us too much apparently."

"Is he managin' on his own to take them to the market?" 

"Yeah, he says it's fine. Jimmy comes to lend a hand on the weekends."

"Ah, that's nice of him."

"He sometimes comes after school when he feels like it." Caroline said and Mundy nodded. "His parents encourage him to work with us during the holidays." 

"He's only a kid though, can't have him be there full-time I guess." Mundy said.

"Yeah, nah, you're right. His parents told me he wasn't doing so good at school, so they try to give him a bit of work to do. We talked with them a lot. Jimmy's learnin' fast and he likes it at the farm."

"Wanna hire him when he finishes school?"

"Your dad and I are thinkin' about it." Caroline said and nodded to herself. "We aren't getting any younger and it'd be good to leave the farm to someone… Now, we know you like it but not to the point of workin' full time there."

Mundy lowered his head. 

"Yeah… I wish it was all different." Mundy took the last gulp of his coffee and left, not giving his mother any chance to ask him what he meant. 

The Aussie put some warm clothes on and kept thinking. He wished it was all different. He wished he had been better at school and right now he would have had an office job, nice nine to five kind of routine, a car, a house of his own, a sheila and a few kids… 

He could also have liked farming more, and then he would have taken the responsibility of his parent's farm after them. The business would stay in the family and Mike and Caroline wouldn't feel like a lifelong effort of taking care of chickens and geese went down the drain… 

Mundy could have not preferred men or liked them at all. That way, it would surely have been a thousand times easier to find someone to settle with. He himself was very shy but females sometimes went to talk to him, hit on him even, but men? Never, or so rarely…

"Hm." 

Mundy took Marty's tennis balls with him and went to get the dog on the leash. 

"Marty? C'mere, big boy, we need to put you on the leash."

Marty rose from his bed and trotted to Mundy before he sat down in front of him.

"We're gonna go for a walk, Marty." 

The dog's ears pricked up and his tail wagged faster. 

"Oh, you got that, didn't you? You clever boy…" 

Caroline and Philip joined him in the living-room. 

"You boys have everythin' you need?" 

"Yeah." Both Philip and Mundy agreed. 

"Then let's go." 

They left the house and walked only a few minutes before reaching the sand. 

"You live very close to the beach, Uncle Phil." 

"Yeah, got that house a long time ago. There weren't that many tourists and everything was so much cheaper…!" The old man was holding on to his sister's arm to walk. "Now, everythin's so painfully expensive… Oh, you can get Marty off the leash, let the boy enjoy the beach."

"Sure, c'mere Marty." Mundy took a second to undo the leash and took the tennis ball from his pocket. As soon as the dog saw it, he started barking eagerly. "Alright, alright, catch this!" Mundy threw the ball far away in the sand and Marty ran after it at full speed. 

"He likes the exercise, this dog." Phil said. 

"Course he does." Caroline answered. "Back when the farm was bigger we had a couple of dogs, they kept the chickens safe in the nights. They're very smart, eh." 

"So smart we get them to join the police…!'' Phil answered. "That's what Marty was supposed to do, but even as early as a puppy, he was way too gentle and soft, wasn't bad at the obedience stuff, but no predatory instincts whatsoever in this boy. He could have ended drug sniffin', but he wasn't very enthusiastic about it either, so I took him in."

"You did well." Caroline said and Marty came back with the ball, he gave it to Mundy who threw it away again. 

The three of them were walking in the sand, along the shore. The air was salty with the proximity of the sea and the breeze was icy but through that, they all breathed some better air. Besides, Marty was loving the large space to play fetch. 

"Y'all should come back with Mike in the summer." Phil resumed his speech. "The sun shines beautifully, the water's lovely and this part of the beach isn't as touristy as the rest." 

"And who would take care of the farm?" Caroline asked rhetorically. 

"You could hire up some folks for summer. I'm sure there are plenty of young people who'd be happy to feed chickens and sell them before college starts again." Phil answered. 

"Yeah… We always say we'd do that with Mike but it never happens in the end." 

Marty came back, dropped the ball in Mundy's hand and went to run towards the water. He got his legs wet, jumped on the froth coming to him, trying to bite it, and ran back to Mundy for more playtime. 

"Why'd you never do it?" Phil asked his sister. 

"Cause we have no reason to not take care of the farm… We like it."

"Have you ever been on a holiday, Carrie?" 

"O'course I have!"

"Your honeymoon doesn't count." Phil added and Caroline sighed.

"Phil…"

"You haven't, have you? I'm not judgin', Carrie, just saying. I was like you, eh? No holiday on duty. But now, with my bad leg, I've learnt to take some time off and it's not bad."

"Yeah… I reckon you're right but uh…" 

"Feelin' bad for the chickens and geese?" 

Marty came back again and Mundy threw the ball for him. He then dusted his hands off of the sand and put them in his pockets. 

His parents had never taken a bit of holiday since forever. They cared a lot about their farm and it would surely feel weird for them to stop. Mundy understood it in the sense that if he had been asked to stop hunting completely, he would feel lost. 

Well, he had been asked to stop completely, and multiple times at that. His parents weren't supporting his choice of profession, and Mundy's father grew more and more keen on his son taking over the farm. As Mundy grew into hunting more and more, Mike's frustration with the realisation that his son had other plans than taking the family business grew too. Father and son weren't on the best terms and tried to keep their disagreements away from Caroline, but she was far from stupid and knew that she was the only reason that Mundy and Mike still talked. 

"I'm just sayin', Carrie. If you wanna come back come summer time with Mike and Micky, I can give you the house for a few weeks." Phil went on. 

"That's very nice of you, Phil." Caroline answered. 

Their voices were a blur on which Mundy was writing his thoughts. He took a deep breath of sea breeze and looked around him. There were a few people here and there, a few happy dogs enjoying their outing as much as Marty was. Mundy's eye lingered on the occasional couples. He had passed the age to feel jealousy towards them, or even envy. What he felt was the bitter punch of knowing that there had been no one so far who had made a positive difference to his days, no one with whom he could have a decent bit of conversations, no one who had seen in him more than a hunting vagabond, and a promise for an assorted, nomadic adventure. A trip with a starting line but no arrival.

Mundy sighed. 

Looking back at the past and seeing the emptiness that all of Mundy’s previous encounters left was one thing, the bitterness of it was one thing, but what really hurt was that stubborn glimmer of hope that he could not shake off, however hard he tried. And God knew how he tried, he tried to look at the facts: a man with a man was unthinkable enough, a man with him, the loner, the socially awkward, ever stammering, unable to communicate his feelings to even his mother, a mess of an almost forty-year-old man.

Oh he wished. He wished he could open himself wide open and scoop that hope out of him because in truth, that was what was killing him. That part of him that believed that one day, he would open his van’s door to see a pair of masculine eyes full of love, loving him as much as he did them… 

God, why did he have to bear the double sentence of preferring men over women and hoping to find one…? 

[theonlygamergost]

Friendship disguised as rivalry - Seaside!au

It isn’t Gost if she doesn’t think about something and the writes about it, so here I am, making an au and writing a fanfic about it.

I haven’t written in a while and this was beta-read by me, so sorry for any errors. 

Seaside!Dspm au is a fanmade au by me where the members work at a sea housebath called, “Seaside”, here is the original concept, might wanna read it for context.

~~~~~~~

Dream accidentally says that ‘He’s better than Techno’, so they hold a Sky surf race to see if he’s right.

~~~~~~~

Warning! This contains swearing!

Enjoy~

It had been a windy day, no doubt, the sky had been coloured by the plastic Sky surf kites floating around, sometimes it blew Wilbur’s mind that at the end of each one, there was a person, surfing away. The sunset could be admired perfectly from the counter of the bar, and because they were so close to closing time, he had time to admire it slowly, “I’m happy Dream’s and Sapnap’s course is going well” Ranboo approached the counter and left off a tray with dirty glasses, Wilbur hummed in reply. The younger boy, leaned on the counter himself and had to cover his eyes from the blinding light, “Niki came by and told me they had to call Tommy and Karl to help because of how many people there were”. The musician sighed and stretched before placing what Ranboo had brought inside the dishwasher, “They got lucky that there was a lot of wind today, perfect to launch off the activity” a little breeze passed right at that moment, both of the boys smiled at the timing.

A ring of a bell snapped Ranboo out of his thoughts, “Whoops, that's for me!” and hurried to the kitchen. Just as he left, Wilbur realized that loud laughter was coming his way, and when he turned to see who it was, he was welcomed by the “Dream team”, Tommy, Karl and Technoblade, all of them had slightly damp shirts and a towel, “The best thing is that the wind was in his favour and still lost!” Karl exclaimed and the rest apart Dream started laughing, “I’m sorry Dream but he beat you faire and square” George placed a hand on the blondie’s shoulder who immediately shrugged it off, “I don’t need you to remind me” he rolled his eyes, Tommy laughed once again, “What Dream?” Sapnap hit him with his elbow, “Is the little piss baby too angry to admit defeat?” The rest of the boys laughed, “Guys please stop, it isn’t funny” he crossed his arms, Techno spoke up, “Yeah guys, give him a break, it isn’t nice to rub salt in the wound, he knows he’s a sore loser” a bright smile and mischievous eyes looked at Dream, “Oh fuck off Techno” the blondie surrendered and leaned on the counter, Wilbur welcomed him with a smile, “Let me guess, they’re making fun of you because you called yourself ‘Better than Techno’, ey?” Dream nodded, sitting in one of the high stools at the counter, everyone did the same, dropping off the backpacks at their feet. Tommy slammed his hand on the counter, “Will you should have been there! Techno was a disadvantage the WHOLE time and fucking killed it!” The pink-haired man cracked a little smile, flattered to see the little blondie so excited about his win.

Wilbur grabbed six glasses and placed them in front of each boy, pouring water in all of them, Sapnap and Tommy chugged them so he had to refill them instantly, “Well now I’m curious, tell me how the race went” George giggled just thinking about the events that went down not too long before, “I’ll tell him!” Karl exclaimed, and started narrating.

_____________________

On Phil’s recommendation, Dream and Sapnap, both Sky surf instructors, had put up an event where from two pm until five-thirty pm, with a small cost, you could Sky surf for thirty minutes with the establishment’s equipment, and if you didn’t know how to do it, they could teach you pretty easily. The idea was nice, both men were down to do so, and the day was pretty windy, they were expecting a maximum of six, seven people as soon as they opened, not twelve. Pretty early they called Karl to come help them with the event, an hour later they also had to call Tommy because they really had underestimated how many people would be interested. So the afternoon was going well, something about thirty people showed up in the end and everyone was tired, thank god the two helpers were around that day.

As everyone was getting back to shore, Techno, who had left Jack on lifeguard duty, dropped by to see how it was going, “I’m glad Phil’s idea took off” Dream was knelt folding the kites, he smiled at the pink-haired man, “Yeah, I mean when did Phil’s ideas not take off” Techno smiled, he was right, Phil always had the best ideas, “Are you tired yet?” The blondie got up and shook his head, “Nah, had to stay on land for most of the time, Sapnap and Tommy handled the sea part” he placed the kite in its respective backpack and grabbed the board and strings, “Would you be down for a race? Voices says that you’re better than me and I’d like to prove them wrong”.

Dream cringed, a couple of days ago, out of pure adrenaline from winning a race with the ‘Dream Team’ he had yelled that ‘He was better than Techno’, he didn’t mean it, Techno and he had was a mutual rivalry with a shared skill level, their only difference was Dream knew how to exploit the winds currents to go faster, Techno had more experience on surfing in general, so he had better balance, knowledge on how to control the kite and had an extreme precision when jumping, you couldn’t tell which one was better. “Ah… that… Yeah, s-sure! I’ll give you a chance” Dream stuttered, he was sure the pink-haired man knew he was the one who said that and yet, Techno smiled, as nothing happened. “I’ll go grab my equipment then, see you at the starting point” and so he turned around and headed off to the lifeguard chair. Dream sighed, “Oh what have I done...” he was already a little sore, mostly his arms, but Techno was ready to go and completely fresh, knowing the man, he was going to give it his all.

“Hey Dream what are you standing there for?! There are still things to put away!” Sapnap approached him, slapping his hand on Dream’s shoulder, he flinched, “I have done a mistake” he turned to look at the man with the black hair, he tilted his head in confusion, “What did you do?” Dream sighed once again, “I woke up the sleeping pig...”. Sapnap blinked, and upon realizing what Dream had said-

“Holy shit dude... KARL! TOMMY!” he immediately shouted back to the other two boys helping some people off their gear, running towards them, “TECHNO AND DREAM ARE HAVING A RACE!!!” at this point all he could do was sigh for the third time as yells of excitement came from behind him, he stared out at the sea, this was going to be a difficult one.

____________________________

After they inflated the kites, slipped into their suits and laid out the strings, they were ready to go, “Ladies and gentlemen! A race between the best Sky surfers of the Seaside bathhouse is about to begin!” George talked through the megaphone, gaining the attention of the bathers, Dream started to feel the familiar adrenaline of being the centre of attention. “Please stay clear of the start/arrival and the path of the race!” He spoke again, looking back at Techno, Tommy was childishly jumping around him, probably spouting encouragements, like Techno even needed them.

“Hey dude, good luck” Sapnap approached him and smiled, Karl also waved his hands around, giving him a thumb up, “YOU CAN DO IT DREAM!!!” He shouted from next to Niki, that happened to come and watch, he felt a little reassured by the positivity. Right before they started, George whispered him a “Good luck” and smiled before speaking back into the megaphone, “The contenders will have to get into the water, circle the buoy in the distance and get back to shore, the first one to complete the course will be the winner!” After a deep sigh, he signalled Karl to let go of his kite, Techno did the same to Tommy, “Dream, Technoblade, that the best may win, good luck to both” the contenders nodded to George’s wishes, “You scared Dream?” The pink-haired man had tied his long hair into a pigtail, Dream scoffed, “I should ask the same to you!” The other man smiled, “Good luck green man”, he nodded.

“On your marks… Ready… Set…GO!!!” George gave the go, both men ran into the waves and hopped on their boards, the race was on.

Techno started surfing first but Dream passed him quite early, calculating how the wind went, his usual competitive technique should have worked just fine, and it did, he was the first one to circle around the buoy, Techno had lost a lot of ground, they were both too far way too hear the people cheering on the shore.

The wind picked up, Dream took it as a good opportunity to increase his speed, and so he did, kneeling a little. He could feel the adrenaline rise as the people were becoming bigger and clearer to see.

Well, that was until his rival surpassed him with a long jump, the happiness disappeared and got replaced with fear: It was Techno’s speciality, jumping a very long distance even without a favourable wind.

As the man got further away from him, he started calculating how he could gain back some ground: Jumping was out of the question, the wind would have knocked him in the wrong direction, how the hell did Techno do it? The best option was to follow the wind as much as possible and correct the trajectory manually, it was all he could do.

But not long after a dozen of meters, Techno jumped again, and of course skipped a long distance, getting him an irrecoverable distance from Dream. It was over, no way he was getting this, the adrenaline started to decrease as Techno got on land, a loud cheer announced his defeat.

___________________________________

“Ey! Good job Techno!” Wilbur shook the man a little, gaining a smile. “Dream did very well too, he had an impressive advantage at the start” George looked at the blondie, they both smiled, Dream felt lucky that his ‘Team’ had his back. “EWWW! Get a room you two!” Tommy yelled out, making everyone laugh,

“HEY GUYS!!!” They all turned to see Quackity wave at them from the other side of the bar, “We’re playing darts! Who doesn’t join is a pussy!” Tommy and Sapnap jumped off the stool immediately, “As if I wouldn’t join!” The one with the white bandana stated, George giggled and also hopped off, “Yeah sure, wait until I destroy you, then you wish you hadn’t joined” Quackity laughed, “Yeah, sure Gogy!” Karl followed the group, “I’ll cheer you all on!”.

As they got further away, Techno turned to Dream, “Thank you for the race by the way” Dream snapped his gaze at him, “Huh?” the man smiled, “You know there can’t be a better one between us, you have multiple recent gold medals and I have old gold medals. Plus, who cares? I just enjoy racing with someone of my skill level” Dream smiled, “Don’t get soft on me Techno” The pink-haired man smiled, “What, can’t handle compliments?” They both laughed, cheering at their rivalry-friendship.

Ranboo shook Wilbur’s shoulder and whispered, “Weren’t they supposed to be enemies?” the older one turned away from the small glass they were looking through, “Nah, Techno and Dream have always been great friends, they just don’t know how to express gratitude well, so they fight instead” Wilbur went on to help Fundy with the appetizer for the darts contest, Ranboo let out an “Oh…” and then followed Wilbur, leaving the two men alone to chat.

[babbushka]

Good morning!! Omg please use “You’re so fucking hot when your mad” from the smut prompts for Flip! Thank you!!! 💗

(2.5k [this one got out of hand sorry lol] double penetration, spit as lube/come as lube, multiple orgasms)

He kicks the door a little too harsh, when he comes home. He tries, you know, tries. He tries not to bring home the bullshit from work, tries to leave it all at the station. He loves his job but fuck they really don’t make it easy sometimes, they don’t make it easy to feel like he’s doing something good.

But he tries, because he’s home, and at home is all he ever wants to be, with you is all he ever needs. So he takes a deep breath, puts his keys in the little dish by the door, shrugs out of his sherpa coat. Not before taking out a pack of camels, sticking one between his teeth and lighting it, but still. He’s better now, in a better mood, even if he kicks the door a little too harsh.

“Honey? I’m home.” He calls out as is his tradition.

It started as a funny little howdy-doody thing, he doesn’t remember when exactly he said it first. But he said it, and it had made you smile, and you’re smiling now as you come into the foyer from wherever you had been waiting for him, and that’s what mattered.

“Phil!” You’re bright eyed for him even though it’s two in the morning. Standing in your pretty robe with your hair catching the low-light from the kitchen where if he looks he can see some dinner kept on the heater for him, dinner that smells so fucking delicious that he wants to cry. You can tell, and your smile softens as you open your arms for him with a gentle, “Hey.”

He steps out of his boots and sucks down some nicotine and tries not to run into your arms. He gets there, and you hold him, squeeze him real tight in those capable arms of yours, and he gets himself all angry again, all worked up, all pissed off.

Why should he have to spend hours cutting through red tape when it all leads to nowhere, when he could be sitting at home with you, with his wife, with his best friend? It doesn’t seem fair, and he’s angry about it, angry that they’re shelving the case. What a waste of time.

“Hey ketsl.” He sighs, holding you and letting himself be held, there in the foyer.

“Bad day?” You whisper, tucking your head under his chin. He’s the perfect height for it, and he kisses the top of your forehead enough that you’re huffing out a little laugh from the tickle of his goatee.

“Can you tell?” He asks, even though he knows it’s a dumb question – you’re a better detective than he is most days.

“I can always tell honey.” You pull your arms up around his neck, twirl some of his soft hair around your finger as you press yourself real close. “Want to talk to me about it?”

“Honestly? I want to fuck you about it.” He mutters, because the thought of you, the thought of your body so sweet and lush around him calms him down.

He realizes he’s got a death grip on you then, and you shimmy out of it ever so slightly, just enough to undo the sash of your robe, let it fall to the ground.

You’re naked, not a stitch of nothing on you except for a littering of bruises and marks he’d given you before he’d gone to work, and the blood rushes from his brain to his cock so fast it makes him dizzy.

You forget sometimes, that he was a military man. You forget until he’s picking you up and hoisting your body over his shoulder like some sack of potatoes, until he’s carrying you down to the fire in the living room and laying you down real easy. His hands are quick as the cigarette ash flicks into the rug, and your legs are already spreading for him.

“God fucking – dammit – fucking,” He curses as his zipper sticks, your hands coming to the rescue.

He kisses you, hard, bruising. He’s all tongue and teeth as he sucks on your lips, growing angrier and angrier by the minute. Why did he have to spend all that fucking time on the case when he could be here, be home, kissing you instead? You moan into his mouth just from that, from making out too rough by the fire – it feels like the most important thing he’s done all week, making you moan.

“I was hoping you’d come home soon, I was starting to get antsy without you.” You say as he attacks your neck with hickies and crooked crescents of his teeth.

“I thought about you all goddamned day, going blind over paperwork for no fuckin’ reason ketsl I thought of you, I wanted to be here.” He rushes out to say through grit teeth, jaw clenching so hard he’s afraid something might snap.

But then you’ve got all the buttons on his flannel undone, and he’s shrugging out of that too, yanking his undershirt over his head, and your hands are hot like the fireplace all over his skin, feeling him up, feeling his muscles.

He needs to move away just the barest hint to get his jeans and briefs off, but the second he does he wastes little time prying your legs open, dragging you the few inches closer to him, sinking his cock into your wanting pussy with no trouble at all.

“Fuck – fuck Flip,” You moan, “Hard, fuck me hard.”

And he does, oh he does. He corrals your legs around his hips, and you lock your ankles together so he can lean over you, cover your whole body with his, fuck you into the rug so bad you’ll burn about it later. He’ll rub you down with lotion and then fuck you again for it, you know he will, and it’s all worth it because his cock is huge and fills you so completely that it feels like there’s no air in your lungs, only him.

“Ketsl this pussy is the best fucking thing I’ve ever had.” He grunts, hard and fast and angry angry angry, sweat dripping off the tip of his nose onto your face.

You smile, before your mouth drops into a real pretty O because you’re gasping because he’s fucking your gspot hard.

He wants you to come as many times as he can, wants to feel it when your thighs quake around him, when your body squirms under him. He’s not letting you go until you’re nearly delirious from it, because that’s all he needs, that’s all he wants; to give you so much pleasure it makes up for him being gone eighteen hours today.

“Take me take what’s yours take what you want – oh!” You gasp, voice loud in the dark. You come, and he grins, kisses your cheeks all over for it, sweaty and sticky as you shake rattle roll under him. He’s not done with you, not by a longshot.

He squeezes his eyes shut and rams into you hard, pushes your body up up up the rug, fucks you fast, skin slapping on skin. Your arms and legs are wrapped around him like a vice, your pussy hot and tight on his cock as it takes the pounding, the curve of his cock stretching you in all the right ways.

“Say my name, I’m gonna get you coming again and when I do I want you to say my name, okay ketsl?” His voice is so deep, and he presses it into your skin, makes you cry, makes you shout even while you’re coming, eyes nearly crossed from the pleasure of it.

“Uh huh,” Your chest heaves while he rails you hard, his cock punching your guts and dragging out moan after moan with it, especially when he adds his thick fucking fingers that have you babbling, “Yeah, yesyesyes oh fuck Phil, please – oh! Oh fuck -- !”

He covers your mouth with his and swallows your screams as he grinds his dick into you hard, presses down on your clit harder with spit-slicked hands, and your legs fall from around his hips, feet kicking on the floor from how strong of an orgasm it is, so close after the first.

“So good to me honey-bunny, so fucking good, you’re the only damn thing I ever want, you know that, know how much you mean to me?” Flip praises you because it’s true, because you need to hear it, because he knows you like to hear it.

His hips don’t still, and now you’re openly crying, hiccupping out sobs of pleasure as he fucks you through your second orgasm real easy. He likes you like this, when you’ve got tremors all through your body, tremors that he put there.

“Yes! Oh yes, Flip, honey, yes!” Your back is arching nearly clean off the floor, your head tossing from side to side as your arms stretch out above your head, body bouncing on the rug from how hard he fucks you.

“Open your mouth for me baby.” He grabs your jaw to keep you still, and you do right away, lips parting and accepting whatever he gives you.

He shoves a couple fingers onto your tongue, two fingers that he rubs against the inside of your cheek, makes you suck on them. You grab at his wrist and hold it steady there as you make out with his hand, all while tears cling to your lashes and he thinks you’re the most beautiful fucking woman he’s ever seen in his life.

“Hhhh, I – I – ” You try and get something out but it doesn’t quite work, not really.

He kisses your cheek for the effort though, spit sticking to your smile line when you grin and lave your tongue over his wedding ring. He almost wants to come from that, but he doesn’t, not yet – he wants one more out of you before he’ll let himself come.

He pulls his fingers away from you and slows down enough to stop. He pulls out, making you whine about how you don’t want him to stop, until you’re gasping because he’s shoving those fingers into you, two up your pussy and his thumb on your clit, and then adding his cock back into the mix slowly.

“Oh my god – Philip I’m going to scream I’m – ” You gasp as he fucks you with his fingers inside you, massaging your gspot with his index finger.

“You can do it, you’re so good ketsl, baby you’re so good for me.” He grunts, groans and shakes and sweats for you.

It’s such a weird feeling, getting to feel his cock brushing against his knuckles as it plunges into your pussy. Your cunt takes him like a champ, like he knew it would, and you’re all but convulsing on the floor underneath him, sobbing out pleasured moans, chanting his name.

“Flip – Flip! Phil, honey! Phil I’m gonna – I’m oh fuck!” Your eyes are shut tight as your mouth drops open and you come for the third time, fueling his lust his love his worship of you.

You shake underneath him, riding out the shock of your orgasm, shouting sobbing coming coming coming so hard it almost hurts, your pussy so tight on his fingers and his cock that he’s almost afraid he won’t be able to pull out of you. But then you go limp, exhausted, totally spent for the time being, and he slips his fingers out easily, sucks them into his own mouth and cleans the taste of your come off.

He lets himself spill into you, and then promptly, his arms begin to shake enough that he knows he should lay down. He rolls himself onto his back and takes you with him, you go along easily, settle with your head on his chest as you drool and gasp little quiet moans around his cock.

He takes time to breathe, eyes closed. He reaches for the last few minutes of his cigarette he left abandoned in a little ashtray on the floor, and the nicotine soothes his nerves.

So do you, when you nuzzle your cheek against him. He pets your hair back, happy to be home, happy to be with you. He’s fully sated, and he feels a thousand times lighter than he did when he first came home, and it’s all because of you.

He smiles, a smile which only grows as you get a serious case of the giggles, burying your face into the hard line between his muscular pecs.

“What’s the matter?” He asks, voice husky and deep as your whole face lights up.

“Nothin’.” You lie, and he grins, pinches your nose and gives your face a little shake, you’re so beautiful, all the time. But especially blissed out like this.

“No, it isn’t nothing, I know you.” He tucks your hair behind your ear, caresses your cheek, giving your temple a playful poke, “How come you’re smilin’ so much baby what’s goin’ on in there?”

“Oh Flip,” You roll your eyes at yourself, almost embarrassed when you admit, “You’re so fucking hot when you’re mad.”

“You think so?” Flip raises a brow, even though he’s not surprised. He knew that you thought that, had learned it a long time ago.

“Mhm, something about it, that primal energy.” You waggle a brow of your own, walk two fingers up his chest before tapping the tip of his nose. “It’s incredibly becoming on you, detective.”

“That’s head detective, miss.” He snatches your wrist and kisses it around his cigarette and you only giggle some more.

“My most sincere apologies, sir.” You roll your eyes again playfully, reclaiming your hand and using it to help prop your head up on his chest.

“Why don’t you go upstairs and show me how sorry you really are?” He nods in the direction of the stairs and you groan, half excited at the thought of more sex, and half hating the idea of getting up.

“One condition,” You say, and Flip knows he’d give you anything you ever wanted, all you had to do was say the word, and so you do, but what leaves your lips only makes his heart so soft for you. “You tell me what’s on your mind and eat some dinner with me first.”

“Love you ketsl.” He says quietly, meaning every word of it a thousand times and then some.

“Love you too cowboy.” You press a kiss to a little mole on his neck that you love, before attempting very poorly to pull yourself up and away from him, and failing, the both of you laughing as you try to remember how your legs work.

He’s lucky to have someone that lets him get all his energy out, he knows.

But he’s even luckier to have someone that lets him get it out in a way that’s meaningful, too.

And dammit, he never hit the jackpot any bigger than with you.

[amintyworld]

Doubts - Beginnings Part 4

WATERFALL (Part One), SUNSET (Part Two), SECRETS (Part Three)

A/N: Guess who back, back again-! Anyway, thanks to all the support in the last three parts, this series has been such a blast to write! I’ve finally decided on a name for it - Beginnings, so that’s what they’ll be titled with from now on to avoid any confusion. As always, links to the last three parts are above. I hope you enjoy! - Minty

TW: Surprise Pregnancy, anxiety/worry, blood/gore, alcohol/drinking, implied major character death, sickness, cursing. (Let me know if I need to tag anything else!)

--------------------------------------------

They started construction on a house around a 15-minute walk from Phil’s house, on a hill that overlooked the waterfall in the distance. They didn’t know what they were doing, but Phil did his best to help out when he could and give advice, having been in a similar situation not too long ago. Wilbur went out searching for jobs when he could and managed to get gigs every now and then as he saved up cash to get everything they needed. It was a new feeling for the couple - Wilbur’s constant worry over his girlfriend, and Sally’s determination to not let the pregnancy control her. All in all, it was a bit of a frazzle. Tommy and Tubbo were a bit off-put at the fact that they’d be uncles at such a young age - nonetheless, they tried to take it all in stride.

Phil answered a lot of questions in the following weeks from his two younger sons, who didn’t understand how it all worked. A good example could be just last week when Tubbo gave Sally ginger ale and straw, leaving Phil slightly confused until he figured out Tubbo was trying to help her out since ‘her stomach hurt’. Tommy’s confused ideas of helping were a bit more out there than his brother’s - the Carrot Incident was a pretty good example - but it was clear that their hearts were always in the right place. 

Technoblade was distanced and tried not to get too involved but helped out when he needed to - he told Phil that this was more Wilbur’s responsibility than his, which Phil couldn’t deny. The pig hybrid still hung around the couple and even eased their worries when he realized how absurd some of Wilbur’s concerns became - “You’re reading too much on those books, Wil. Just because it could happen doesn’t mean it will!” Technoblade was always available to talk and support his brother, who became a bit of a mess from it all. 

Still, they were a happy family who was nothing but excited for the baby’s arrival - they were going on five months, and things had been going smoothly… at least, mostly smoothly.

----------------------------------

Wilbur pulled up the covers on the bed as he left a tender kiss on Sally’s forehead. She smiled, yawning. “Wake me up for dinner…?”

“Of course, my salmon. You rest, I’ll make sure Tubbo and Tommy are quiet.”

Another yawn escaped the shifter’s lips. “You tell them if they wake me up they’ll be dealing with a very pissed off pregnant lady who…*yawn* won’t hesitate to kick their asses.” Wilbur giggled softly, brushing the hair out of his girlfriend’s face in a simple loving gesture.

“Get some sleep, okay?” Wilbur said. “I won’t be far.”

“I love you, Wil.”

“I love you too, Sally,” Wilbur said, turning off the lights to darken the room as he gently and softly closed the door behind him. Over time, most of his worries had eased, thankfully - but a few lingered in his mind that fizzled around his brain. Wilbur tried to push them away as he moved downstairs, resting his head against the counter for a brief moment, sitting on one of the kitchen stools. He let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding as he ran his hands through his hair once again. He had a gig later that night, but his body craved rest. Wilbur chose to ignore it, there wasn’t much use anyway. If he napped at this point he’d miss the job altogether, and he needed the cash. Bored, trying to distract himself, he pulled out his notepad and flipped to a fresh page as he rhythmically tapped the pencil against the paper, willing himself to focus his thoughts.

It felt strange to Wilbur to stare down at a blank page and not have anything to write. It was hard to describe how he felt, much less think of rhymes. So much was overwhelming his emotions and feelings, still, he tried to focus and scribble words across the page. Maybe if he wrote it all down, he’d feel better somehow - it always worked for him before. His notepad held all the times he was happy, all the times he was sad, upset, angry, confused… all hidden in words like a code only he could understand. It was the closest thing to a journal or diary that he owned, one of his most prized possessions.

Maybe it’ll comfort him now.

I’m struggling to breathe

Keep going

Protect her

Push forward

Wilbur looked down, his mouth turning down in distaste - this wasn’t exactly the lyrical poem that he usually formed. There was, as always, some truth in the words. It felt like he was ranting, almost. It didn’t make sense.

Everything will be okay

Wilbur’s eyebrows furrowed in thought at what he wrote. He was trying to reassure himself, but… it felt wrong.

Will everything be okay?

“Uh-oh, the notepad’s out,” Phil said jokingly from the doorway as he carried in what looked to be a large basket filled with the garden’s harvest - wheat, carrots, and potatoes. He quickly noticed Wilbur’s distress, his smirk quickly disappearing. “Wil? Wil what’s wrong?”

Wilbur sighed as he read the words staring up at him over and over. “Nothing really. Just a lot on my mind, I guess.”

“I see,” Phil said, not believing that for a second as he set the large basket down on the counter, methodically moving to store up the food. “You look tired.”

“I feel tired,” Wilbur said, finally closing the notepad as he let out a soft chuckle in the suffocatingly silent house. “Got a gig in an hour, though.”

“You need to sleep, Wil.” Phil scolded, his gaze stern.

Wilbur waved him off. “I’ve got a lot I need to do. It’s no problem, anyway - the club’s gonna close up in a few days, and then Jay said I might not get another job in at least a month while they restock for summer.” Phil gave him a look, hand on his hip as Wilbur held up both his hands in surrender. “I’ll get some better sleep then, I swear.”

“Good,” Phil said, his gaze softening as he turned back to the basket. “Are you heading to Melrose’s place tonight, or TBO?”

“Melrose. She needed me last minute to fill a half-hour slot, promised to pay double.” Wilbur said as he got up from the stool and stretched, heading over to grab a cup of lukewarm coffee that was left in the pot from the morning. Hey, coffee was coffee, and he needed to keep the sandman at bay - double pay was no joke, and with his earnings tonight he’d finally be able to get everything they needed for the new house and for the baby. He needed to go, and he had to do well.

“I hope she doesn’t expect to keep dragging you out last minute.”

“Hey, as long as it pays well-” Wilbur shot thoughtfully as he sipped his coffee. The two turned their attention as Technoblade entered the house, his weapons, and clothes covered in blood, a few of his kills on his shoulder. Phil grimaced. 

“Techno, I told you not to track blood in the house, go around to the back-!” The smell of rotting and decay, potent, filled the boy’s noses as they pinched them, trying to get rid of the scent. Technoblade silently turned around, going out the front door again. “You better shower and change before dinner, don’t forget!” Phil called as Techno simply waved his hand.

“Yeah, yeah…”

Wilbur quickly chugged the last of his coffee as he put the mug in the sink and quickly followed his older sibling. The night was cold as he pulled his jacket closer around him, walking around toward the back of the house. The sky was quickly turning dark as the day began to end, stars not quite appearing just yet. Techno sat over the two dead sheep he’d brought into the house earlier, the nasty musk somewhat masked by the cold wind. The pig hybrid was focused as he ran his blade along the belly of the kill, carving and cutting out sizable chunks of meat which he began to wrap in some jungle leaves for storage. Technoblade liked hunting, and no one could deny his skill, knowledge, and precision of it. He was patient and always waited for the right moment to strike, always hunted smaller game because he knew others were too big to carry back home. The prey always usually went down in one hit, and if that didn’t do the job Techno would usually hold the creature down while he made a quick jab toward the skull. He pig prided himself on his hunts, which provided the majority of their meat for meals ever since the town decided to enforce a livestock tax on the people to raise a little extra coin.

Setting the packages aside, Techno looked up to notice Wilbur staring at him silently. “Uh, hey Wil. Whaddya need?”

“Can’t I just check on my sweet older brother?” Wilbur smirked, and Techno huffed, amused.

“You can, but you and I both know you don’t.” Technoblade joked as he walked past him, heading toward the river with Wilbur close behind, grabbing a cloth and his bloodied weapons along the way. The pig hybrid took a breath as he turned to look at his brother. “What’s wrong?”

“It’s nothing important, really,” Wilbur said. “I’ve just been worried, I guess.”

“About Sally?” Technoblade asked, kneeling down beside the river beginning to scrub his weapons clean. “Don’t tell me you’ve been reading those parenting books again, I’m telling you they’re shit-”

“I’m worried about myself.” Technoblade’s eyebrows shot up as he looked at his brother, slightly shocked at the intensity in his voice as he sat next to him by the riverbank. Wilbur took a deep breath as he tried to release the stress from his mind, looking into the clear running waters. “What if I mess up, or… or I can’t be a good father? What if I’m the one who’s not ready, you know?”

“This has all been your decision, Wilbur. Your life. I can’t tell you that everything will be sunshine and rainbows because to be completely honest Wil, I don’t know.” Technoblade said honestly, moving to place his clean sword on the grass and moving to grab his axe. “But I don’t think you should be worrying so much about the future. Live in the moment, in the now. If things go bad, you’ll know what to do Wilbur. Trust yourself.”

“But what if I-?”

“Nope. No more worrying.” Technoblade said, cutting off his brother. “Just focus on right now, and as cheesy as it is, have a bit of hope.”

“When did you get so philosophical?”

“I’m wise beyond my minutes, young one,” Technoblade smirked as Wilbur laughed. Techno began to wipe off his face and neck of blood, rinsing the cloth in the river as he went. 

“Do you have any parenting wisdom to place upon me?” Wilbur asked, half-joking.

“I mean, It’s not really my department. Kids aren’t really… they’re not my thing.” Technoblade said with a little shrug of his shoulders. “But if I had any advice to give you, it would be that if you have the same patience and love Phil had for us, I think you’ll do just fine.”

Patience and Love. Live in the moment. Trust yourself. His worries seemed to melt and dull in his mind, and he felt a lot better than he did earlier. “Thanks, Technoblade.”

Technoblade just saluted his two index fingers with a smile before moving to get up, ruffling Wilbur’s hair. “Be good to the little scamp, this family’s already crazy enough.”

-----------------------------------

Wilbur zipped up his guitar case as he grabbed his keys and the small bag of coins. Looking out the window, he could see the nightclubs and bars, restaurants and torched streetlamps slowly flicker to life, glowing against the dark sky. Like a whole new town lying just beneath the surface, revealed in the darkness. Sally walked over with his gloves and scarf, a gentle sad smile on her face as Wilbur took the wool gloves and pulled them on.

“Every time you leave, I miss you just a little more.” Sally said, wrapping the scarf around Wilbur’s neck and folding it neatly in front. “Do you have to go?” Wilbur warmly smiled as he gently cupped her cheek.

“You know I’ll never be far, my salmon.” He kissed her forehead tenderly as he brushed a bit of stray hair behind her ear. “You’ll close your eyes and when you wake up I’ll be right by your side, you’ll barely even notice I left.” Sally leaned in closer as Wilbur wrapped his arms around her comfortingly, his chin resting gently on her head. As they pulled away Sally’s eyes looked up to his, a worry and fear behind her gaze that seized Wilbur’s heart.

“Promise you’ll be safe?”

“When am I ever not safe?” Wilbur asked, leading Sally to cross her arms and look at him with a slight pout that made Wilbur laugh. “Okay, okay. I promise.”

With one final goodbye kiss, Wilbur shut the bedroom door behind him again, walking downstairs. He noticed Tommy sat on the couch, head in his hands and his blonde hair messed. He looked over to his younger brother, gently propping up his guitar against the stair railings. “It’s late, what are you doing up?”

“Nightmare.” Tommy mumbled, slightly sleepily.

“Do you... wanna talk about it-?”

“I’m not seven anymore, Wil. It was just a stupid nightmare, I can handle it on my own.”

Wilbur was quiet for a moment, processing what Tommy said, how he snapped at him. He sighed before looking over to meet the teen’s eyes. “If you’re sure you’re alright…?” Tommy nodded before Wilbur pulled him into a small hug, Tommy’s hand held onto his arms around him in comfort as he smiled slightly despite his current state.

“Heh. Thanks, Wil.”

“That’s what big brothers are for, right?” Wilbur smiled as he pulled away. “Don’t stay up too late, okay?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, I guess I’ll be off.” Wilbur said, getting up from the couch to grab his guitar once more, throwing the straps over his shoulders. “That gig won’t play itself.”

“Good luck, Wil.” Tommy called before Wilbur turned, his heart warm and happy, giving him a smile and thanking him before taking his leave into the cold night air.

------------------------------------------------

“Thank you, you’ve been an amazing audience!” Wilbur said as cheers erupted from around the pub. Moving off the stool, he grabbed his guitar by the neck and sauntered offstage, feeling happy with his performance. Within 30 minutes he managed to squeeze in four songs, which to his delight the crowd seemed to enjoy - at Melrose the tap was never empty, and as such the crowd was easily angered by the slightest things, or even nothing at all. The only somewhat mishap during his slot was when a bit of beer had splashed against his clothes thanks to a patron who had a little too much. They were quickly shown the door and the night resumed its somewhat peaceful pleasure.

He walked up to the bar and sat in the corner with his guitar, watching the next musician take the stage - it looked like a band from the amount of people. Wilbur knew he wouldn’t get paid in full until the end of the night after each performance was done, Melrose wanted to make sure they held up their end of the bargain instead of running off what the money. He had at least another hour in here before closing.

“Are you drinking or not?” Wilbur looked up to the bartender as he stared down at him, expecting some kind of response. He wasn’t exactly a big drinker, quite the opposite - the only times he’s ever drank were with Phil and Sally. Sally, once when they were both eighteen just to try it out - he winced remembering the monster hangover the morning after. Phil around a year ago when he turned twenty-one and they both shared a few beers together in celebration. Both times he’d gotten tipsy pretty easily, either because he wasn’t exactly used to drinking yet or because he was a natural lightweight, who knows. Either way, he wasn’t exactly going to risk getting drunk right now.

“Uhm, I’ll have a club soda, thanks.”

The bartender gave him a once-over, put off by his request before slightly shrugging his shoulders. “Suit yourself, buddy.”

“Alright, we’re Black Rose and we hope you enjoy the set! This first song is called ‘Sleepless’.” A guy spoke into the microphone, turning to his friends with a smile before counting them in as the music began to blast through the pub. It was a nice tune, and Wilbur found his foot unconsciously tapping along with the music. He closed his eyes and let the sound fill his ears as they began to sing the chorus. It felt right. There was a kind of emotional distress behind the singer's voice, in the twinge of his tone or in a voice crack or two that almost felt like magic.

“And I’m not going blind, I just keep falling, falling behind; 

Time goes slow and fast, my heart’s pumping and my head has crashed; 

Sit in silence and pretend like your demons are your friends; 

Your thoughts are racing while you’re pacing, it’s all in your mind, sleepless~!”

“Hey Wil, you got a minute?” Wilbur jolted back at how close the voice was, as he looked over to see none other than Melrose - her blonde hair flowed down her back messily with a ruby red dress that complimented her blue eyes. She pursed her lips into a line, a signal she was thinking as her pen tapped against the clipboard in her hand. “Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you.”

“It’s, uh, it’s fine. What’s up, Mel? Hope my performance was up to par.”

Her lips formed back to a comfortable smirk. “Performance was great as always, Wilbur. You never cease to please.” Her eyes turned down toward her clipboard. “Though I’m afraid I can’t say the same for everybody. Tips came up a little short thanks to a few blanks, I’ve got to decrease your pay for tonight.”

Wilbur’s eyebrows furrowed. “Mel, you promised.”

“Look, Wil I’m sorry but there’s nothing I can do.” Melrose let out a sigh, rubbing her temple in frustration. “I’m barely making enough to pay as is.”

As she turned to leave, Wilbur quickly grabbed her wrist to stop her. “Mel, you don’t understand, I need the cash.”

Melrose sighed, rolling her eyes. “Don’t we all.” She snapped slightly, yanking back her arm. “I told you I can’t do anything-”

“Rosie, come quick!” One of the bodyguards interrupted as he approached with a sword slung over his back. “Charlie’s getting wasted in the back, someone gave him vodka…”

“Goddammit, not again. Can’t that bastard ever get sober?” She huffed, giving Wilbur one last look before slipping back into the crowd. Fuck. Well, there goes a whole extra gig’s pay - with the pub’s restock he won’t be able to pay off everything now even if he had work twice each week...dammit. The due date was in April, he still had time. He could probably get another job while the pub’s down, he’ll have to check the town bulletin on his way home later. He turned back to his club soda, letting out a defeated sigh.

Guess I’ll be away from home more than I thought. 

A scream from outside quickly tore Wilbur from his thoughts as he turned toward the sound.

-------------------------------------

Philza was a light sleeper. Being on the road and sleeping the wilderness had always made him jump at the slightest hint of danger, a sort of survival instinct that developed. It only increased when Techno and Wilbur came around, for the first time in his life he had someone else to protect and look out for than just himself, more he could lose. He guessed that’s why he jumped the gun a bit at teaching them how to fight so early - If he couldn’t be there in time, he wanted for them to be able to protect themselves. Even so, his instincts from way back then never stopped, which was most likely why the head of the family was awake now.

Muffled sounds came from below him, shuffling. Something was here, and whatever it was it wasn’t good. His heart beat quicker as adrenaline rushed into his veins. He grabbed his sword, leaned against the wall, and crept down the hallway silently. It was dark in the house, he could barely see a few feet in front of him as his eyes adjusted to the darkness. He couldn’t hear the noise anymore, which only heightened his senses as his heart beat faster.

Then, a groan which sent him backing up - that was much, much closer than before. Suddenly, he bumped into something that grabbed his arm and without thinking he swept his feet under whatever it was, sending them to the floor. “Ugh… hey to you too, Phil.”

He looked down and noticed his oldest moving to stand back up from where he fell against the floorboards, rubbing the back of his head. “Techno…?” He asked before quickly helping him up. “What are you doing, you scared me!”

“I was checking out the noise, same as you.” Technoblade said before readjusting his grip on his own sword. “Remind me to never spar with you when you’re in attack mode.”

“Will do.” Phil smirked. Both quickly tensed as they heard shuffling and groaning from down below, clear enough for the two to recognize the noise instantly. They looked to each other, eyes wide. Zombies. Where there’s one there’s bound to be more around in minutes. “Get Tubbo and Tommy, I’ll get Sally.” Technoblade nodded before turning and rushing off behind Phil as he rushed toward the end of the hallway, toward Sally and Wilbur’s room. Phil didn’t know how they managed to have a breach in the walls, but however it occurred it meant one thing - the next ten minutes were the difference between life and death.

He entered the room to see one of the rotting creatures standing over the shifter, who decked it clean across the face, her ears scanning her surroundings, green goop covering her hand. She turned to face Phil, who rushed forward and pushed his blade through the zombies’ skull, killing it for good. Both panted heavily as Phil checked her over, worried. “Are you okay, did it bite you?”

“No, no. I’m good.” Sally reassured him as she looked around the room. “Where’s Wil?”

“I...I don’t know, but... I’m sure he’s safe, wherever he is.” Phil said, trying his best to push his own worries out of his mind.

“Wait, he’s not back yet?” Sally’s eyes grew wide at the realization as her body tensed in worry. “He’s out there, with… with…”

“Wilbur knows how to handle himself.” Phil reassured her, worry growing in the back of his head and forming an uncomfortable spot in his stsomach. “For now we need to be more worried about ourselves - If we’re going to survive until morning we need to barricade the house, and fast.” Phil said, grabbing her by the wrist as they rushed back out into the hallway, Phil chopping another zombie’s head clean off its skull as they rushed past it toward the stairs. He could see Tommy and Tubbo wielding their swords as they tore through zombie after zombie in the living room, somehow making it into a sort of game as they smiled and laughed. Technoblade, on the other hand, moved chairs and tables against the two doors to block them watching his back as a zombie stauntered toward him, and he swept his legs under the creature and quickly curb stomped its skull, slimy green goo flowing into the wooden floor. Phil tossed Sally an axe that she caught quickly, feeling the weight in her hands and happy to have a weapon. “Clear out the ones inside.”

“Got it.”

Tommy jumped from the couch onto a tall zombie, piercing it through the chest and pinning it with his sword to a nearby wall. “Ha! Top that, idiot!” He shouted trumphantly toward Tubbo, who’s eyes lit up competitively as he attempted to hack a nearby zombie in half and managed to get his sword stuck.

“Uhm…”

Sally rushed in, ignoring the tender soreness in her tired body as she hacked the zombie’s head clean off with her axe as its body slumped to the floor. Quickly and effortlessly, she pulled out the lodged weapon and handed it to Tubbo. “Be more careful, yeah?”

“Uh… yeah, yeah…” Tubbo said sheepishly as he took his weapon back and Sally rushed to finish off Tommy’s pinned zombie. With a few strikes, it was down. Tommy grabbed his sword to get it free, tugging harshly to no avail. He got more anxious with each tug as Sally faceplamed.

“You stupid-” She muttered, handing him her axe. “Finish off the last two with Tubbo, and try not to lose another weapon, okay?” Tommy huffed in slight protest before Sally gave him a look and he rolled his eyes, taking the weapon and running off.

“I don’t think it’s gonna hold!” Technoblade yelled as he threw his back against the door, pushing it closed against what must have been around twenty zombies pushing and trying to get in with any means necessary. Sally looked over to Phil, who looked around frantically, trying to think of a plan, any plan at all. “Phil?”

“Phil, what do we-?”

A loud crash erupted - a broken window. Danger. Phil’s grip tightened on his sword as he began to shout orders. “Tommy, Tubbo, hold the back door NOW! Sally, stay behind me.” Phil’s tone was tense and sharp, and the two teen boys rushed like mice to do as he asked. “We just need a little more time, it’s gotta hold a little longer…” At this point, he was hoping for some kind of miracle. This wasn’t just a regular breach - this was a massacre. Rushing forward, he pushed the shadow in the dim light down to the floor, and quickly raised his axe to bring it down when-

“Wait wait wait-! I’m not one of them!”

Phil’s eyes squinted in the light to find… Wilbur. He looked like a mess, his clothes torn and ripped with green slimy goo staining the fabric. Phil’s eyes watered in relief as he quickly pulled his son in for a tight embrace, helping him up off the floor. “Thank god, don’t ever scare me like that again.”

“Good to see you too, Dad.” Wilbur smiled before the two let go, his eyebrows furrowed and his tone more serious. “These aren’t regular zombies, they’re stronger and more resilient. Last I checked they were taking down the square one house at a time, and from the looks of it most of them were not prepared for a visit.”

“...Fuck.” Phil cursed under his breath, his mind beginning to race once again. Did they have a chance?

“I ran as fast as I could to get here, I was so worried…” Wilbur said as Sally rushed forward to embrace him with a smile, running her hands down his face and through his hair, afraid she’d lose it again. Wilbur, in turn ran his hands down her arms, his smile brightening that it was real and alive and here-

“Good to see you’re not dead, Wil.” Tommy huffed against the door as the monsters on the other side growled and moaned, pushing their weight and strength against it. “But we have a bit of a situation here!”

“We need to get out of here.” Wilbur looked over to Phil. “If we stay any longer, we’ll be trapped. Once we’re out of here we can run into the forest to hide and wait out the horde.”

“But both exits-”

The two elder brothers looked at their father and answered at the same time in surprise. “The second floor window.” They turned to each other, sharing a brief smile. Technoblade looked over to Phil once more, his mind and heart racing as the voices in his head boomed louder, and he tried his best to ignore their shouts. 

“Look, it’s risky, I know, but we’ve gotta try. We don’t have time.” He winced and grunted as the zombies on the other side of the wall grew more violent in their animalistic attempts to break in. Phil looked at his family’s faces, hints of fear and uncertainty in their expressions. Tommy’s arm went to stop Tubbo from falling over at a particularly forceful blow, and as Tommy’s nerves increased he could see Tubbo holding his hand and giving it a squeeze. Technoblade’s heels dug into the wooden floor as chairs, tables and wooden boards began to splitter under the force of the creatures outside. Wilbur pressed a soft kiss to Sally’s forehead as Sally’s hand drifted to her stomach instinctively at this point, her eyes filled with nothing but worry. He knew this was crazy, but if it meant that there was a chance they’d be safe, he’d risk it.

“Alright. Wilbur, make sure the window’s open and we have a clear way down. Everyone else, get ready to run.”

----------------------------------------

Wilbur’s heart stopped as he saw the creature’s teeth sink into Phil’s neck as he let out a scream in agony. Shit, shit, shit… he didn’t know where they came from, they blocked the stairs as they ran up, why didn’t he see it?! The zombie that bit Phil fell to the ground with a thud as Phil’s own blood seeped down his shoulder and stained his shirt. Techno stilled as he made eye contact with his father, who looked sad, knowing his fate. “Phil, I’m so sorry, I-” Wilbur trembled, his hand reaching out toward Phil, not knowing what to do, what to say. Phil’s head shook back and forth slightly before pushing his sword into Wilbur’s hands.

“You two need to go. Now. Before you lose the chance.”

Technoblade was stone faced. “Phil, we’re not leaving you-”

“There’s no time to discuss this, I said GO-!” Phil shouted sternly before going into a coughing fit, holding himself steady against the wall. Wilbur stepped forward, wanting to grab his hand, help him before Phil recoiled. “Wil… Techno… you need to go, that’s an order.” Silence fell over the two brothers, not wanting to leave their father. “Look, they’re not going to attack me now but they will attack you, now MOVE IT!”

Shuffling and groans grew behind them as Phil winced, feeling the infection flow through his body. They needed to get out before he turned, they needed to live, he wanted them to live-

“But what about you?”

Phil looked over to his sons with a sad smile. “I think I’ve taught you both enough to know what happens now.” Suddenly it felt like all the air in the room vanished. “Now do me proud and show me what we do if someone gets bit. Show me what I’ve taught you.” Phil could feel himself getting lightheaded, he was going to pass out, but he couldn’t… not until they both were safe.

Wilbur didn’t know what to do as he looked to Techno then to Phil, who slowly lowered himself to the floor, his back leaning against the walls of the home he built for them. Techno’s fists tightened as he turned to face his brother. “Techno…?”

“Get somewhere safe, okay?” His voice was heavy, serious. “Promise me you’ll get somewhere safe.”

“I… I will, I promise.” Wilbur said, trying to look at his brother to see if he had any plan. “But what are we going to-?” Before he knew what was happening, Techno shoved him through the window, closing and locking it firmly behind him. Wilbur began to panic, realizing what Technoblade was doing and trying to find some kind of grip before he slipped off the roof and landed in the bushes, pain and bruises blossoming on his body. Tubbo helped him up off the ground as Tommy’s eyes looked up to the window, confused. 

“Where’s Phil and Tech?”

Tears pricked at the edges of Wilbur’s eyes as he felt his heart begin to throb without them here. Why, why why… Why did he stay? Why didn’t he let him stay? Why wasn’t he careful enough? It’s all his fault-

“Wil…?” Tommy’s voice wavered. “Where’s Technoblade and Phil?”

At that moment, Wilbur knew things changed forever. Phil and Techno were gone, they were gone and they were never coming back. He told Technoblade, he promised him that he’d get all of them somewhere safe, and with a heavy heart Wilbur knew it wasn’t here, not anymore. He wasn’t going to lose anyone else, he was going to protect them. He was going to protect all of them, if it was the last thing he’d ever do. That very moment what Techno said to him finally made sense.

‘If things go bad, you’ll know what to do, Wilbur.’

Right now, he wanted, more than anything in the world, to get them out of here. Tubbo and Tommy shared awkward glances as Wilbur took a deep breath for a moment, sniffling and wiping the tears from his eyes. Sally looked towards him concerned as Wilbur slid his hand into hers, looking towards his brothers with the same look and tone Phil had. 

“We need to go. Now.”

[thatsbucknasty]

she used to be mine (v) waitress au

summary: Inspired by the broadway musical. Y/N Beck is a pie baking force to be reckoned with. She’s pregnant with her lazy ass husband, Quentin Beck’s baby. As everything around her turns upside down, Doctor James Buchanan Barnes charms his way into her life.

pairing: Y/N x Bucky

I will put some warnings in the tags cause I don’t want to spoil everybody but I feel like there are sensitive topics in this one, so go ahead and check the tags!

chapter 5: you will still be mine

You’d think that having an unplanned pregnancy, an unemployed lazy husband and an exhausting job that underpays would be just enough to realize you’re having a bad year. But now, on top of that, said unemployed lazy husband’s truck broke down and I just can’t afford to fix it right now, he’s asking for money cause he already took it to the shop without consulting with me, and it’s not like I can just give him my savings.

He was out all night yesterday, drinking I assume. I have to tell him I’m pregnant. And also, I have to walk to work and to my doctor’s appointment later today, because I can only afford one bus ride per day and usually it would be the one back home from work cause Quentin would drive me in the morning. Life’s just fine and dandy isn’t it?

I’ve seen those videos where women will make a big deal showing their spouse the little pregnancy test and record their reaction. It usually involves tears and hugs and all things pretty, and I can’t help but feel like I’m never gonna have that kind of life. The one with balloons and cake and glitter for the gender reveal party and the baby shower. And I’ve never even wanted those things, but I’m pretty sure Quentin’s reaction will be the farthest from tears and hugs and all things pretty.

-

“Morning, Y/N, you’re late again. It’s the third time this month”. Sam looks angry at me from the counter, at least he’s back to his grumpy self but I feel bad nonetheless.

“I am so sorry Sam, I swear I’m not doing it on purpose, it’s just that I had to walk and you know 4th street’s closed and-

“Hey, calm down girl. I understand. I know y’all think I’m rude and moody all the time but I just like teasing ya... if you ever need help I can give you a ride in the morning”. Great, now even Sam is pitying me.

“And I know what you’re thinking. ‘He’s pitying me’”, he rolls his eyes at me, “but I care about you girls despite all of our bickering. I’m just offering my help cause we’re pals, aren’t we?” He offers me a cup of coffee and I decline but sit down on the stool.

“Why aren’t you drinking coffee Y/F/N?” Oh shit.

“I uh, I-” Shit, shit, shit.

“Y/N?, tell me what’s going on?”

“Fuck, Sam, I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. We are pals, we are! But I didn’t want Nick to know cause I thought he might fire me. I’m pregnant”. I finally sigh and hide my face in my hands, trying hard not to cry in front of him. “God, this is embarrassing”.

“Hey! There’s nothing to be ashamed of here. I understand, actually a lot of things make sense now. The girls know, don’t they?” I hum my answer, my face still in my palms.

“Have you told Quentin yet?” I shake my head and look down at the orange juice he puts in front of me instead of the usual coffee, huh, he can be nice when he really wants to.

“You’re in a real conundrum, aren’t you?”

“Yes I am. He hasn’t been working for the past three months. He didn’t come home last night and we fight almost every day. I don’t know when I’ll start showing but my uniform barely fits and my feet are swollen from walking here. It’s just a matter of time until he notices. I can barely afford my doctor’s appointments. Oh! And I might have a tiny crush on him”.

“Your doctor? Wasn’t he married?”

“How did you- nevermind. Well, he’s getting a divorce, but I am married so nothing’s gonna happen either way”.

“Jesus, I wish I could do something to help you. My offer on the ride still stands, okay?”

“Thank you, Sammy. You’re very kind but knowing my husband, he would never allow it. He’d rather I walk with my swollen feet everyday and I don’t wanna fight with him. I’m just so tired”.

“Y/N, I know this ain’t my place but, why are you still with him?”

“I honestly don’t know anymore. I keep making up reasons when Nat tells me to ‘leave his ass’ but I can’t think of any more good ones”.

-

The diner was very quiet today, most Tuesdays it is because Al’s Pancake World has a discount. Sam swore he’d keep the secret about my little crush. I just don’t want Nat to have more material for insisting I should leave Quentin right now. And now I’m walking over to the doctor’s office.

The air tonight is so crisp and I appreciate how summer is about to end. Fall has always been my favorite time of the year. I can’t wait for the diner to smell like pumpkin pie every day. Speaking of pie, I brought Bucky some leftovers.

“Good evening, Y/N. Oh gosh, you brought pie?” 

“I said I would, didn’t I?”

“I’m starting to think I should give you something back, you really didn’t have to”.

“Oh don’t worry about it, it’s just some leftover ‘Kick in the pants pie’, I know, the name’s a little too aggressive but I had a bad week, don’t judge”.

“No one’s judging here. But care to explain the name?”

“I just- I had a fight with my husband earlier, and whenever I wish I could do something that’s not very nice, I just make it into a pie, you know… to express my feelings in a non-violent way”.

“So you wish you could kick your husband’s crotch but you made a pie instead, got it”. It’s insane and we both laugh about it for a minute and he leans back into the exam table. This is nice, having a friend who I can openly talk about my issues with. Wait, are we friends?

“Do you and your husband fight a lot?”

“Um… why are you asking me this?”

“Oh, nothing, it’s just- stress is bad for the baby and, I don’t know. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to-”

“It’s okay”, I lean into the exam table next to him, close to him, “we do, we fight a lot. He drives me nuts, and I’m a pain in his ass. That’s just us I guess”.

“I get it. I was a pain in Dot’s ass too”, he scoffs out a cynical laugh and looks at me, “guess she couldn’t deal with that anymore”.

“Can I ask what happened?”

“You can, but I wouldn’t know how to answer. She just got up and left one day. Said she got an internship in New York and we weren’t working anymore, so- she didn’t even give me a real reason, nor a chance to work things out”.

“I’m sorry, Bucky”.

“It’s fine. We always wanted different things. I was raised in a small town and when I went to Chicago for college I was miserable. But I met Dot and I thought life in a big city wouldn’t be so hard if I had her by my side. But then she wanted to do even bigger”.

“Like New York?”

“Yeah. I’m not cut out for that. I love this little town of yours, always did”.

“Oh, so you’ve been here before?”

“Yeah, my grandparents lived here and I would come visit for the holidays. You actually remind me of my grandma”.

“Gee, thanks?” He throws his head back laughing.

“No, I mean because she used to bake like, ten different pies for Thanksgiving. She loved baking. And she was also a little-” He eyes me sheepishly and makes a face.

“A little what, huh?” I smack his arm and try not to laugh at his stupid, cute antics.

“Well, a little strong willed?”

“That’s a euphemism for stubborn”.

“Yeah, it is”. He has the audacity to smirk at me and I can’t help but smile because he says it in a way that feels like a compliment.

Bucky finishes the examination and tells me he’d like to see me again in three weeks. He opens the door for me and we do a little dance of who gets out first. We laugh at each other’s clumsiness and I feel like a teenager. He smells nice, like always. I say goodbye and I find myself hoping the next three weeks go by quickly. I glance at my watch and notice the time. Fuck, has it really been two hours? My appointments usually last thirty minutes tops.

-

“Hi, Y/N”. Fuck, he’s here already?

“Jesus, Quentin, you startled me. What are you doing here? I thought you were supposed to see the game at Phil’s tonight”.

“Yeah? And I thought you were supposed to come home early, you said no extra shifts on Mondays”.

“I- I was-”

“Now don’t lie to me, cause I found your money! That’s right, I did! Why were you keeping money in the closet, huh? I took the money, paid Carl to fix the damn truck and drove over to Nick’s and you weren’t there. That angry redhead chick said you left early, so where, the fuck, were you?” He grabs an empty bottle of beer and throws it against the wall.

“Quentin. Stop it, you’re scaring me! Calm down!”.

“I won’t calm down until you tell me where you were!” He grabs another bottle and raises it above his head, aiming straight at me, I’m frightened and I don’t know what else to do but-

“I’m pregnant!”

Silence. Complete and utter silence. He lowers his arm along with the crystal bottle he’s holding. Tears cascade down my face silently and I can’t help them. I hate crying in front of Quentin but he truly scared me. He’s never been violent towards me. Sure he yells a lot but he never gets like this, and I’m sure he would’ve thrown that bottle at me if I hadn’t told the truth.

“Please say something”.

“You can’t be pregnant, Y/N, and if you are it isn’t mine”. He whispers and I don’t know if I heard him right. I’m at a loss for words for a few seconds.

“Why would you say such a thing? It is yours!”

“No it isn’t! I don’t want it!” He’s yelling again and his words break my heart. If I had the smallest belief that he actually cared for me, it’s gone.

“Quentin? Do you remember that night I went to the Stark’s party with you and we both got drunk? You were wearing your fancy blue shirt with the grey tie, and I had that red dress that you like. This baby is yours. And if you-”

“No, it isn’t! I said it isn’t, Y/N. I- I can’t do this with you, I can’t and I won’t!

“What are you talking about?!”

“You remember Alice? You met her at that party”.

“Right, mini skirt girl, I remember. What about her?”

“She and I-” He looks down at his feet and then back into my eyes and I see it.

“No”. My blood begins to boil. This bastard!

I feel a huge knot in my throat and I can’t breathe. All this time I’ve been grasping for something, anything. Clinging for this marriage to work. Feeling guilty about baking a stupid pie for my doctor, when he’s been sleeping with some girl who’s probably ten years younger than him?!

“No!” I grab the nearest object and throw it at him. And of course it’s a fucking pillow- “Get out! Out, I said! And don’t ever come back!” He’s backing down, opening the door and I yell at the top of my lungs, I don’t care if the neighbors hear me- 

“That money you stole from me was for the doctor’s appointments and the hospital bills, I saved up all of that for this baby, your baby, alone!  And you’re gonna pay me back! I kept a roof over your fucking head, paid for your fucking beers and you cheated on me? If you ever come near me or this baby I will kill you, you hear me?”

I grab his keys and put them on my apron’s pocket.

“And I’m keeping the stupid truck!”

He leaves, on foot, and just like that I’m a single mother. 

“AH!”

What is this? The most terrifying pain strucks my pelvis and I feel a discharge in my underwear. No, no. Baby don’t do this. We are gonna be fine, you and I. I promise. Please. Don’t.

-

chapter 6: a soft place to land

a/n: pls reblog if you liked it c: and don’t kill me, I promise fluff is coming!

[smalltragedy]

* natalia dyer, nonbinary + she/they | you know philomena carmichael, right? they’re twenty, and they’ve lived in irving for, like, a day? well, their spotify wrapped says they listened to the leanover by life without buildings like, a million times this year, which makes sense ‘cause they’ve got that whole wind whipping around your hair, the gentleness of decomposition, a naked blur dancing around the flames of an everlasting fire thing going on. i just checked and their birthday is april 20th, so they’re a taurus, which is unsurprising, all things considered. ( james, 22, est, they/them )

hi thank u all fr being so patient w me as i rapidly switch out muses n figure out wht the fuck im doing atm <3 also sry fr my rare presence work hs been kicking my ass like lets jst say i deserve 2 b smbdy’s housewife (misogny wins this time sry) so i nvr hv to work in my life <3 DFSLKSDHKGLFSHLKAGHLKAHLKSG this is a joke 2 clarify. anyways. this is philly she’s old bt she’s one of my very favorites ever. this intro is also old sry its nt in my usual. style. LKDFKHGLKGF

CANCER, TRAUMA, DEPERSONALIZATION / DEREALIZATION, DEATH, GRAPHIC MENTION OF DECAY, INSECTS MENTION TW.

mini playlist.

the girl who stole my tamagotchi ;; hot sugar / i dropped out ;; and the kids / pork soda ;; glass animals / wonderfully bizarre ;; bendigo fletcher / (dream) ;; salvia palth / alien blues ;; yundabar / dust in your pocket ;; glass animals / warm honey ;; willow / bela lugosi’s dead ;; bauhaus / gecgecgec ;; 100 gecs / blinding ;; florence and the machine / nantes ;; beirut / cherry-coloured funk ;; cocteau twins / not allowed ;; tv girl / oblivion ;; grimes / space song ;; beach house / dog food ;; 100 gecs / the leanover life ;; life without buildings.

statistics.

full name: philomena brontë carmichael

nickname(s): philly, phil, mena, etc.

birthday: april 20th, 2000. 

zodiac: taurus sun, scorpio moon, aries ascending.

mbti & temperament: infp & improvisor / phlegmatic. 

label: the halycon.

sexuality: demisexual.

pinterest.

biography.

a middle child belonging to christopher and imogen carmichael - two stanford professors. christopher specialized in british literature whilst imogen specialized in the classics. hence the name.

the order of siblings goes as such: lysander, elektra, juno, philomena, and twins orion & valora. the deal was that everybody had a greek (or in juno’s case, roman) first name and a middle name inspired by a piece of british literature circa 1800s and under. a family of nerds, if you will.

so, clearly - right off the bat, their parents are … eccentric. they’re both in love with their respected topic, and with each other, and with their kids. the carmichael family is a happy family.

they each have their own quirks and whatnot - though philly’s always been particularly dreamy - even as a child, she’d spend hours watching clouds or caterpillars or the leaves blow in the wind rather than play with other kids. she wasn’t a shy kid - she just had her own interests.

hardship doesn’t hit the family until philomena is five and starts having splitting headaches. they’re slow at first - but as soon as she’s seeing spots and unable to walk in a straight line, doctor appointments are made.

cancer tw // it doesn’t take long for them to discover the tumor, though the official diagnosis of malignant ependymoma comes a month later.

it’s grade ii but slow-moving, small enough to not be as much of a threat as worried, but big enough where removal is necessary. philomena earns a scar and brings it in for show-and-tell. for two months afterwards, philly’s at radiotherapy monday through friday.

they’re lucky - philomena’s considered cancer-free by the next year. she’s babied at first - handled delicately, as if she could break if touched - but with five other children … it doesn’t last for too long. end of cancer tw //

and life continues as normal.

her personality doesn’t shift much over the next few years - she’s awfully independent for a kid, and awfully quiet - when she speaks it’s about faeries and bigfoot, about how the sky is so blue and if you listen quietly, you can hear the leaves whisper their secrets to each other. this is not odd.

she’s close to all her siblings, but she idolizes her older sister - elektra. elektra’s six years older and dyes her hair whatever colors she wants. elektra bought a knife off a seedy guy downtown. elektra threw away all of her heels and renounced god. elektra is god. her music is loud but it’s not heavy - it’s florence and the machine.

they’re opposites - elektra’s boisterous and feels loudly, philomena’s softer and feels…less. when elektra sneaks out, philomena keeps watch. they are a duo.

philomena is smart - but she’s fifteen and hates school. hates sitting inside all day. hates the same routine - day after day - it’s all the same. her parents’ routine is the same, philly feels contained and she wants to live.

elektra’s twenty-one and just bought a brand new spanking (used but not falling apart) 19-something volkswagen … van - using her entire savings account. she says she’s tired of routine, she’s leaving the next day.

naturally, philomena stows away in the back and isn’t discovered until they’re two states away and she’s got to pee. elektra nearly crashes the van in shock.

it’s an argument - philomena vs. elektra, then them vs. their parents, then their parents vs. the school, the state - it’s an ordeal. philomena switches to an online program in the end.

it hurts christopher and imogen - lysander’s not having any of their nonsense, juno’s betrayed and alone - the twins are twins. in the end, it’s alright. the carmichael family is a happy family.

philomena and elektra take their time - it’s not a road trip, it’s their new life, permanently on the road. they stop and explore often - they do odd jobs in whatever town they settle in. they dine-n-dash, they shoplift. they survive in their own way.

during particularly desperate times, they two resorted to identity theft & credit fraud - getting away with it only by ditching the cards once they’ve made it out of state.

she drops out of high school officially when she’s seventeen - they have to drive all the way back to california to deal with the wrath of their parents and to deal with paperwork, but it’s done. philomena doesn’t know what path she wants in life - but it’s not that.

depersonalization / derealization tw // it’s during this time that the episodes occur - philomena’s outside her body, philomena’s wrapped in cotton, her memories are not her own. she’s looking in the mirror and she doesn’t recognize herself. they take shelter in a city for six months, long enough for her brand spankin’ new therapist to figure out what’s wrong with her. she’s diagnosed with depersonalization / derealization disorder - they think it’s stress. philomena doesn’t get stressed. they think it’s trauma. she laughs - she never laughs. depersonalization / derealization end of tw //

death, decay. maggots tw // there is trauma though, deep-rooted but somewhere inside - you just have to look for it.

you. just. have. to. look. for. it. look for it. look for it. look for it look for it look -

you were ten and she was thirteen, an off-trail hike in familiar woods in a familiar town, safe and familiar. it was your idea, to stray from the carved out paths, down creeks and up hills and round, and round again. you’re the one who spotted the scarf first, sticking up from the dirt and dancing in the wind like the beginning of reincarnation. it was not reincarnation, it was discovery. it was ruin. with curiosity drawn, you skidded down - with compliance, followed juno, followed your sister - clumsy in her steps and tumbling down quicker than you. you saw the corpse, but juno felt it. decaying flesh and maggot. end of death, decay, maggots tw //

and she left juno, just like that - just five years later, when juno had finally gone to the end of her wits. philly up and left. abandoned her.

philomena and elektra leave the city after that therapy session. they do not return. she’s always been good at hiding her secrets.

after ending up with warrants from their arrest in florida (after running from the law in texas), philly and elektra have wound up at irving <3 partially hiding from the law and partially bcos their trusty van’s broken down and they haven’t got the money to fix her up yet. 

personality & facts.

she’s quiet but she’s confident - her voice sounds like rustling leaves, if leaves smoked a pack of cigarettes a day.

often underestimated - philly’s petite and looks like she’d fall over if a plastic bag blew too close to her. she’s independent - for the most part. elektra is the only person philly takes orders from.

has always been considered odd - weird, strange. still talks about the trees as if they’re listening, as if they’re old friends. she’s vague and doesn’t elaborate on the things she says.

believes in pretty much any superstition you throw her way. luck is very important to her. if you ask her if the earth is flat, she’ll say probably. believes strongly in bigfoot and the lochness monster. has personally seen aliens, and loves ghosts almost more than herself.

she can be amusing - whether you ‘get’ her or not, her outlook is often bright - she talks about the negatives the same way she talks about the positives. can be seen as naive or gullible, but she’s plenty smart. even if half of her education has come directly from google.

philly doesn’t laugh. a smile, yes - often, in fact - not always reaching her ears, or bearing teeth - but these are not indicators of her happiness. philly is consistently content. she thinks many things are funny - she still will not laugh.

her voice is often monotonous - she doesn’t sound dreary, she sounds far-away. her voice carries. her emotions are often unknown to others.

is apathetic in most situations. she’s hard to bother - she’s incredibly patient and enjoys the company of most - tolerates them at the very least. it’s hard for her to express her emotions, because she feels them so little that it’s very nearly not worth it. her affection is not verbal - it’s small touches and gestures of kindness, love in her own way.

is a fan of knock-knock jokes and bad puns. she won’t crack a smile while telling you them, nor does she expect you to laugh. she just enjoys them.

she owns a motorola razr covered in puffy stickers - hasn’t ever had a smartphone. she’s a fan of emoticons. her favorite is :o)

has a lot of bruises and scratches and scars - she’s often getting herself into pickles. there are always, at the very minimum, three bandaids on each hand.

she has insomnia, so she’s awake often. is often seen wandering town - even when she shouldn’t be, even when it might be dangerous. her intuition is delayed. when she does sleep - her dreams are vivid and fantastical.

keeps a box of memories - sentimental bits and pieces she’s picked up over the last few years. there are a lot of buttons and postcards, but any teeny tiny object will do.

her style changes every week - most, if not all, of her clothes are thrifted. one week she’s baby spice and the next she’s lydia deetz. she combines pieces from different styles often - she looks like a barbie clothed by a child. she feels most comfortable like this.

will either patch-up the clothes that get too worn or reuse them in some way. sometimes donates the clothes she gets tired off - isn’t minimalistic, but she’s learned to keep only a small amount of possessions.

the only consistency is her lucky ribbon - it’s pastel yellow and silky and as thin as a shoelace. she ties it onto her outfit of the day, everyday. if she loses it, she’s lost. elektra has a matching ribbon.

has no problem with minor theft - she only takes bare minimum, puts herself and elektra first and that’s how it’s always been.

currently living in florence, their van, with her sister elektra <3 currently residing in lilac ridge.

they used to live in motels on the occasion, the cheapest room, and more often than not they’d both go home with strangers for a comfier bed and a hotter shower.

it was a common occurrence - she didn’t sleep with them - but somehow, she weaseled her way into their homes anyway. has come out mostly unscathed, on most occasions. this has been a practice ever since they’ve been on the road.

really, truly - has not slept with anybody, had her first kiss at thirteen with a frog. this doesn’t bother her. (smirks at leo)

will consume anything you put in front of her - isn’t picky.

listens to whatever they’ve picked up along the way but she likes instrumentals the best. her second favorite genre is 1990′s and 2000′s top hits. they’re nostalgic for her. third favorites? florence, of course. fleetwood mac. the bird and the bee.

loves storms - will go out in the rain and will risk her life for it.

owns a pair of roller-skates and is often skating rather than walking. unless she’s on grass - then she’s walking barefoot.

has many hobbies, and gets bored of them often. her favorite hobby is welding. she’s not certified.

also, juggling.

also, accordion.

the kind of girl who’ll do any job you give her. odd jobs are her favorite jobs. babysitting is her least favorite - but she does it anyway. has lost children before. have they ever been found? not by philly.

dyes her hair blonde often and cuts her own hair - bangs included - finds it cathartic, likes the itchiness of bleach.

everything she does is often in pursuit of feeling free, alive, and meaningful.

( like her frequent visits to the woods, late at night when the moon is high and full. it’s freeing to dance around a fire, stark naked in the cold. builds immunity )

comes and goes wherever she pleases, nothing & nobody can stop her (besides elektra).

has a certain knack for getting animals to like her. has too many ‘pet’ rats that reside with her, alongside a baby raccoon & a few crow pals. has a new animal companion everyday, but she doesn’t contain them or force them to stay.

wanted plots.

speaking through my third eye ... ;; philly is new in town n shes very strange. constantly lives in a state in which she does not exist (at least on the same plane). this is her harassing the locals. this is her slipping thru their fingertips as they attempt 2 understand her. they get close smtms bt philly jst. whisks herself away.

hollows of our eyelids ... ;; perhaps there is smbdy jst as strange as philly. i’m out here calling fr all the weirdos. lets be friends. lets hv philly n co go on adventures n discover horrible sites n uncover ancient secrets tht lie deep below irving. mayb nt tht. bt im jst saying. this is fr the dreamers. da weirdos. the jugheads. LHKDSHFSADLKGFHLSKADG fr those who also feel as if they r not real.

bills n aches n blues... ;; ya this is my call fr all negative plots. bills (catching philly be a thief and a fraud), aches (mayb heartache? unrecruited feelings or w/e theyre called?), n blues (ooooh so sad... so sad ... angst ...) obviously i am a genius. i wldnt say tht philly is here 2 make enemies bc philly doesnt care much abt ppl bt perhaps tht cld b an issue. tht she doesnt care much abt others. mayb ur muse is jst like. cn u pls care. n philly is like. i am incapable. sry. sucks.

n also ,, ;; like. anything i’ll. take anything. philly is weird lets come up w surreal plots tht verge on the edge of like. nt being correct fr this verse. suddenly theres vampires? or so they think ... smirks. anyways. shes been 2 jail n been in the circus (shoutout 2 kirby) n dances naked in the woods n hoards animals n treasures. we hv a lot to work with here obv. 

[sweet-baby-abdl]

Who's the Baby?

Author: Horatio Husky

Contains: Sissification, ABDL, Fantasy, Mind-altering

Chapter 1.

Babysitting

Scrolling through his Instagram feed was the only thing that kept Phillip's mind from brooding over the fact that today was probably not going to be as entertaining as his friends who were showing off on social media.

He looked up glumly to see the houses passing by as the car he sat in rumbled along the suburban streets, heading straight towards his aunt's house for a day of babysitting.

His mother had lightly scolded him before they had sat down in the car, chastising him for protesting in helping her sister out even after she said she would pay him well.

Fifty bucks for a whole afternoon of fun with my baby cousin... Hurray... the teenager thought to himself sarcastically, as the car made a left turn onto the street where his aunt lived.

"Oh don't look so grumpy Phil, this is the kind of stuff you can put down as work experience. Taking care of little kids is a more important job than you might think, plus it'll teach you some patience! You're getting paid too so remember to thank Aunt Becky, okay?"

"Yes Mom..." came the tired response as he rolled his eyes, adding a tally to the count of how many times his mother reminded him to thank his aunt. Counting this one, the amount was now at five.

"And don't forget, Penny is still really little so no rough-housing or horseplay, do you understand the young man?"

Yes, Mom!" came a more exasperated reply from Phillip. Of course, he knew not to play roughly with a little girl, he might have been a grumpy teenager from time to time but he was never mean or unfair.

No, Phillip wasn't worried that he wouldn't know how to properly play with a little girl, in fact, he could imagine pretty clearly what games she would probably be interested in playing. He was more concerned over the fact that he would probably be bored out of his mind the entire time.

Thankfully he had slipped some of his advanced math assignments into his backpack, he was sure he'd be able to find a spare hour or two while his cousin preoccupied herself to at least get ahead on a little homework.

As the minivan pulled into his aunt's driveway he groaned internally, seeing the mess of children's toys spread across the front lawn which he knew extended into the house.

His aunt always believed that a child's environment shouldn't be too constricted or organized to allow them to use their creativity to their fullest. Philip just interpreted this as a lame excuse to not have to clean up after Penny's famous 'playtime adventures' she always subjected her babysitters to.

Opening the door and shouldering his backpack, he hopped out of his car and waved at his mom as she pulled out of the driveway, making it pretty obvious that she was not in the mood to interact with her sister either.

Real encouraging Mom... he thought to himself, as he watched his mom wave cheerily back as she slowly accelerated down the street, taking a right and vanishing from his sight.

Mentally preparing himself, he turned around on his heels and walked up to the front door, ringing the doorbell twice.

"PHILLY!" came a muffled scream from behind the door, which he knew belonged to his baby cousin. She was six years old now, but everyone still referred to her as the baby cousin of the family, as she was the youngest.

He heard the doorknob jiggle as the door sprung open and Penny looked up at him with a wide smile across her face, leaning back she yelled into the house.

"Mommy Philly is here! Philly is here!"

"Come on in Phillip! I'm baking cookies!

Penny grabbed his hand, practically pulling him inside of the house as she leaned over and pulled the door shut with more a little more force than was probably necessary. Feeling grateful that at least her hand wasn't sticky, Phil allowed himself to be pulled along down the hallway and into the kitchen.

His aunt Becky greeted him with a smile that went up to her eyes, looked up from the tray of cookies she was just pulling out of the oven.

"Hi there sweetie, come here and try one while they're still hot and gooey!"

Phillip couldn't help but smile, sure his aunt was a little be eccentric compared to his own family but she did now how to make somebody's day. He and Penny walked over, Phil grabbing a cookie gingerly and blowing on it before taking a small bite.

Delicious, as always. Aunt Becky beamed as she saw her nephew enjoying her baking, clucking her tongue with amusement as she walked over to the dough she was kneading.

"As your grandma always said, the best way to get to a man's heart is through his stomach. Why don't you two grab an extra cookie and mosey on over to the living room, hmm?"

Philip did not need to be prodded twice, eagerly he snatched up another cookie before finishing his first one and walked over to the living room, unshouldering his backpack and letting it drop softly onto the ground.

Becky followed suit, plopping herself down right next to him on the couch as he rummaged through his backpack, having placed the cookies in his mouth to free both of his hands.

Having yet to master the concept of personal space, at least according to Philip, his cousin scooched over on the couch until she was practically pressing up against him, looking curious as to what he was going to bring out of his backpack.

"Oh oh! Did you bring any toys? Or coloring books? Or movies? What's in the bag, Philly?"

Feeling slightly annoyed at his cousin's incessant questions, he responded with a dry, "Nope, homework!"

A thick, red colored textbook labeled, "Calculus Based Physics for the Advanced" along with a calculator, a few pencils, and an eraser tumbled out of his backpack.

Penny wore an almost sour expression, and her nose turned up slightly as she exclaimed, "Ewwww, you brought homework? That's like, the opposite of fun."

Phillip rolled his eyes, he obviously could not expect his baby cousin to understand his love with problem-solving and his enjoyment of mathematics. Still, he rolled his eyes at her disgust.

"Math can be fun Penny, it is fun for me because I've become pretty good at it."

A half grin formed on his face as suddenly he opened the book to a random page, swiftly shoving it towards Penny's face and exclaiming, "Ooohhhh scary math book!"

She screamed in response, tumbling off of the couch with a giddy smile on her face as she ran away from him and out of the living room, presumably to take refuge in her room.

Phillip rolled his eyes once more and took a sizable bite out of one of the cookies as he opened his notebook up, his mind already returning to the problem that he had last been trying to work through.

Just as he felt he had just figured out an effective strategy, he felt something impact the back of the couch and his vision was filled with pink fur.

"Bunny says hello Philly!"

Annoyed, Phillip pulled the large, pink bunny stuffie that his cousin had draped over his head off of him, looking over at her sideways to indicate that he was not amused with her distractions.

Just as he was about to open his mouth to express his perturbance, Aunt Becky bustled into the room with her coat on and a handbag slung over her shoulder.

"Alright darlings! I'm going to be heading out to run a few errands and to see some friends, I'll see you all later this evening! Behave now!"

With that, she walked out of the house and closed the door behind her with a soft click.

Penny turned her eyes over to Phillip, the sparkle in them practically shining out of them as she exclaimed.

"Let's play pretend!"

Phillip shook his head, nodding towards the unsolved math problems he still had to complete.

"I need to get these done, I want to get ahead on my homework this week."

"Pleeeeeeaaaaase? Pretty pretty pleeeaaaase?"

Her bottom lip quivered, and for a second Phillip was concerned that she would actually start crying. That is until he remembered that she seemed to have developed a special talent for crocodile tears.

"No, Penny. I need to work, go find something to play with by yourself."

"Aww come on! You're no fun! I'll tell your Mom that you didn't give me any attention at all if you don't play with me!"

Phillip realized that maybe his little cousin was a little bit more advanced than he imagined, for he did not want Penny to complain to his Mom about how bad a job he did. After all, he did promise that he would look after Penny.

Moving slowly and lethargically, as to indicate that he was not doing this willingly and only because she would not stop nagging, he put away his maths homework while Penny jumped up and down excitedly.

"Fine, we can play a little bit but only for a little bit, I do need to finish this homework today. Does that sound fair?"

"Okay! Okay! That sounds good to me! Let's play house! Let's play house!"

At this she jumped off the back of the couch and started running around it in circles, skipping from foot to foot as she began to sing excitedly.

"I'm gonna be the babysitter! And you're gonna be the babysat!"

Phil rolled his eyes, of course his baby cousin would choose the least fun option for him. He had a feeling that most people his age, even those who despised math, would choose it over a game like this. Then again, he did have a pretty big bias.

"Fine, I'll be the baby. But only for a little bit, understand?"

Penny seemed to not register his indignation as she dashed out of the living room, yelling behind her.

"I'll grab all the props! You sit tight baby!"

I can't believe I actually agreed to do this... I have to pretend to be a baby to a six-year-old? This sure isn't something I'm going to be sharing at lunch tomorrow...

He sat on the couch glibly, resting his chin on his hand as he waited for her to come back. Within a minute he heard her footsteps coming back down the hallway, and saw that she held in her arms an overwhelming amount of pink, frilly clothes and other accessories.

Phil watched as she practically collapsed onto the soft carpeting in front of the couch, dropping all of the things she had gathered onto the floor.

With his eyebrow raised, he saw Penny resurface from the pile of play clothes and baby props she had gotten, and pull out a pink dress with white ruffles on the shoulders and around the waist that looked to be just around her size.

Phil noted the skirt was covered with frills and pink ruffles, almost to a ridiculous extent. He wondered where his aunt had even found such a thing, perhaps at a costume store or purchased online for a Halloween costume.

Before he had an opportunity to further ruminate as to where his cousin had gotten so many things, Penny exclaimed.

"You're the baby girl, put this dress on!"

Phil's eyes widened as he realized what his cousin was expecting, he had thought at least he was going to be a baby boy. He had expected to be wearing baby blues and greens, not pinks and purples.

"No."

"Pleeeeeease!"

"I said no."

"Aw come on, let's play pretend! I'll let you do all the homework you want after we're done!"

Stealing himself and glancing at the window as if somebody might be there, peering in on them, he rolled his eyes and nodded as Penny squealed with glee.

She scampered over to him, dress still in hand and pulled him up to his feet.

"We're going to pretend this dress fits perfectly on you, so come here so I can put it on you!"

Reluctantly, Phil kneeled down and bent his head forward so that she might pull the dress over his head. As she did so he pulled his arms upwards, pushing them through the holes in the sleeves and his head through the collar.

Penny tugged, and pulled the dress all the way down until he had put the whole thing on completely. Phil looked down on himself, noting that the frilly skirt went down just above his knees. The short, puffy sleeves stopped just past his shoulders.

He grimaced, wondering what he would look like in front of a mirror.

As if she had read his mind, Penny ran over to the corner of the living room where he saw a bunch of big colorful boxes containing her toys were placed. Opening the lid of one of the boxes, Penny lifted out a large, stand-alone mirror just around her height.

She placed it gently on the ground and wheeled it over to Phil, who when he saw himself standing there, dressed in a well-fitting dress. He could not help himself, he blushed bright red causing Penny to squeal with delight.

"Philly baby looks super cute! She must love her dress to have such wosey cheeks, huh wittle baby?"

His blush only furthered at her baby talk, realizing that he was growing quite embarrassed from the spectacle.

"Yeah yeah yeah I look adorable, okay what's next let's keep this moving."

Without warning, Penny walked up to him from behind the mirror and jumped up, popping something into his mouth.

The small pacifier he had seen tumble out of his bundle of props had now been lodged in his mouth, the bulb practically filling it entirely and making it very difficult for him to speak.

He tried to pull it out, noting the pink guard and the sparkles that it had been covered with as Penny exclaimed.

"Ah ah ah! Fussy babies get pacis! And you were being a very fussy baby girl!"

Phil suckled on the bulb a few times, feeling rather sheepish at having been told off by a six-year-old like he was the baby cousin in the family.

He shook his head, whatever, he thought to himself, as long as this speeds up play time...

Chapter 2. Tea Party

Phillip looked down at the frills and ruffles that now surrounded his waist and legs, it almost seemed as if the color pink seemed even more intense and girlish now that he was wearing it.

Whatever... let's just get this all over with... suckling on the pacifier, he stood in front of the couch and watched Penny continue digging through the pile of props she had brought.

"Found it!"

Resurfacing from the pile, Penny proudly held up a pink, loudly crinkling baby diaper decorated with patterns of rainbow ponies, princesses dressed in similar clothes to Philip waving magical wands, and castles waving cheerfully colored flags.

"I used to wear these when I was a baby! But now you're a baby and babies need to wear diapers because they're not potty trained! Now we're going to pretend, come over and lay down so that I can change you into your big diapers now baby girl!"

Where did she even find that thing? Hmmm, knowing Aunt Becky she probably saved a few for sentimental purposes.

He looked around, noting the vast amount of knick knacks and various other useless items that seemed to decorate the entire house. It made sense to him that her aunt would have kept a few spare diapers for sentimental purposes.

He sighed, laying himself down and allowing her cousin to place him into the diaper, unfolding it and taping it onto him. It took a few attempts to do so, as her fingers kept getting stuck on the tapes.

Every time she got stuck she giggled loudly, which only made the diapering process even longer as Philip found himself covering his face in shame, the pacifier still firmly lodged in his mouth and getting suckled on as he tried to not think about what was happening.

After a minute, she patted his diapered behind affectionately.

"All diapered up baby girl! Now you can make all the tinkles and stinkies you want and it'll stay in your diapers for your babysitter to change!"

Philip gathered himself to his feet again, feeling the thick padding between his thighs driving his legs apart several inches. The diaper hugged his waist firmly, its thickness and apparently absorbency not lost on Philip as he couldn't help but marvel just how well the diaper fit him.

"It's a good thing that I have diapers in your size too! You seem like a baby that probably makes extra big messes too!"

She stifled a giggle behind her palm as Philip's face reddened once again. He clasped his hands nervously in front of him, feeling grateful that the dress at least seemed to cover the diaper well, although his extra padded behind was a little bit more distinct outlined than it had been previously.

Penny began to skip and dance around him, singing in her sing-song tone of hers.

"Philly is a baaaby! Philly is a baaaby! Philly is a baaaby and we all faaall down!"

With that, she flounced down onto the pile of clothes backwards, falling into a fit of giggles. Philip found himself sitting on his butt, the pink, girlish diapers helping to cushion his fall as he realized he must have fallen down at the same time as her.

I didn't... why did I... but I didn't...

He felt utterly confused, it was almost as if he had instinctively obeyed Penny when she had exclaimed that they would all fall down, but he did not even consider falling down. He had simply done as she had commanded.

Before he had further time to ruminate, Penny jumped up once more and exclaimed happily.

"Okay baby girl, it's play time!"

Grabbing him by the hand, she led him over into her room. Phillipy found that his ability to walk was now significantly hindered, and he was forced to waddle awkwardly the entire way over to her doorway.

"Awww, wittle baby's learning how to toddle! What a good little baby girl!"

Penny cooed loudly, gently squeezing his hand as she grinned up at him, the gaps in her teeth where she had lost her baby teeth proudly displayed.

where he found that several stuffed animals, chairs, and a toy tea set had been set up and was waiting for them when they walked in.

"I already set everything up, you can take a seat next to Mr. Monkey!"

A large stuffed monkey sat closest to the door, leaning slightly to his side with a large, happy expression sewed across his face.

An elephant, giraffe, alien, and a pink bunny were also seated around the table, each propped up in plastic chairs and leaning slightly to one side or another.

Crinkling loudly, Philip maneuvered himself over to the table and sat down, looking around at the other guests at the table and then examining the tea cups and set in front of him.

"It's tea time everyone! And we have a very special guest today, a little baby girl that I'm babysitting named Philly!"

Phillip looked around, and saw that all of the stuffed animals had straightened themselves up now. While their facial expressions had not changed from the blank or happy faces they had displayed previously, they seemed to actually look at him alertly.

As Penny sat herself down, they accompanied and copied her movement as she reached for a cup of tea and brought it to her lips, slurping loudly.

The stuffed animals grasped their cups in turn, bringing them to their nonexistent lips and tipping the cups backwards as if pouring the tea into their mouths.

Philip reached over to do the same, but he must have moved to hastily or misjudged the distance. He grasped over the cup, but his fingers clumsily moved over it, tipping it over to its side and spilling the tea all over the table cloth.

"Oh no! Baby made a biiiiig mess! Silly me for thinking that a little baby girl like you can sip tea from a cup like a big girl like me! Let me get the big baby a baba to dwink fwom!"

Delving into her baby talk towards the end of her sentence, the little girl jumped up from her seat and dashed out of the room, quickly returning with a plastic baby bottle toy that was colored white, indicating that it was full of milk.

"Open wide baby! We gotta get all the num-nums into your tum-tums!"

Before he had a chance to protest, Penny pulled the large pacifier from his mouth and forcefully inserted the nipple of the bottle into his mouth.

Without even thinking, he began to suckle earnestly from the bottle, letting the sweet, warm milk trickle into his mouth for him to swallow.

His cheeks burned with blush, and he found it difficult to put together the thoughts or words to protest. He knew something about this did not feel right, but he just could not finger out why. It was as if every time he tried to think about it some pleasant, stifling cloud floated over his mind.

He felt as if his thoughts were dampened, and it was just so much easier to listen to his babysitter and drink from the bottle, just like the good little baby girl that he knew she wanted him to be.

He continued to drink for several minutes, feeling the contents of the bottle filling the inside of his tummy causing him to feel warm and soft.

Penny stood patiently holding the bottle to his lips, and she continued to coo and gush over him praising him for being such a helpless little thing and a very good girl for being so hungry for her baba.

His cheeks began to feel sore from his blushing, and he was just beginning to think that his insides might burst from the effort when at last the bottle was finished.

"Good girl! Now it's time to burp the baby!"

Grabbing his arm gently she pulled him forward, resting his chest against her shoulder as she began to pat his back firmly.

When after a few pats he let out a loud belch, his eyes widened in surprise. He had not expected for the pats to actually work, and the redness returned to his cheeks as a single coherent thought managed to bubble itself to the surface of his consciousness.

My baby cousin just burped me like a newborn infant...

"There, aaall better! Doesn't that feel better, baby girl?"

Gently pushing him back into his previous sitting position, she grabbed his arm once again and pulled him to his feet.

"Now it's time to play with toys! Oh oh, let's play with some dollies and blocks! I'll try and teach the baby how to spell her pretty name!"

With no choice other than to follow, and his head still feeling foggy, he was dragged by her over to the corner of her room next to her bed, where a toy chest sat practically overflowing with toys.

Kneeling next to the large chest, she began to rummage through the large container.

"Sit, baby!"

She commanded, and immediately Phillip flopped down onto his seat, waiting patiently for her as she began to take out toys. Dolls, styrofoam blocks, several large building blocks, a stacking ring set, and a few jingly toys that were obviously intended for a child much younger than her.

"Oh these are just perfect for you! We've got plenty of baby toys for little girls like you to play with!"

The burning in his cheeks did not subside as he suckled on his pacifier nervously, eyeing the various playtime toys she had brought out and already finding himself tempted to pick some of them up.

He was not sure why he felt as if something was wrong, should he not be excited to be getting to play with his babysitter?

He shook his head once more, a frown forming on his face as he knitted his brows. Was he not supposed to be the one that was babysitting? Did he not have homework to do?

Just as he was trying to remember what kind of homework he was supposed to be doing, Penny reached over and handed him one of the stacking ring sets.

"Here you go baby girl, try and put it back together again!"

She proceeded to unstack the rings, placing them gently on the carpeting around the spire as she chittered to him cheerfully, encouraging him to put them back together again.

He looked down, picking up some of the rings and appreciating their bright colors, marveling at how incredibly appetizing they looked.

He wondered why he had such a temptation to put them in his mouth, and before he realized it he heard a soft click as it bumped against his pacifier ring.

"Silly! Those aren't for eating! Aww, is the baby teething?"

Penny teased, reaching over to grab some blocks and arranging them in front of him, as if to spell something out.

He gazed at the letters, wondering what they were spelling out as the lines and shapes meant nothing to him.

Did he not know how to read? No, he thought dumbly as he picked up some of the blocks, stacking them on top of each other. Little baby girls do not know how to read yet, do they?

The sudden barrage of thoughts seemed to be too much for his head, for he opened his mouth and his pacifier almost fell out of his mouth.

Penny piped up, cooing over him as she spoke to him in an almost sing-song voice.

"Awww, is the wittle baby tiwed? Does somebawdy need a naaap?"

A feeling of indignation feeled the teenager's mind, and he instinctively crossed his arms, puffing his cheeks out and shaking his head, a frown forming on his face.

"Wooks wike the wittle baby is fussy! Probably in big need of a nap, let's give the baby girl her bottle first though!"

Jumping up, Penny ran out of the room leaving Phil's cheeks to blush as he realized that he was going to be bottlefed by a six year old.

Still, he had a hard time figuring out why such a thing would be so embarassing, after all he was just a baby girl and Penny was his babysitter.

Or... is it the other way around?

Running back into the room, a toy baby bottle firmly grasped in her land, she grabbed the oversized-looking baby and lead him over to a part of her room occupied by several large, friendly looking stuffed animals.

"Sit down here sweetie while Penny-wenny gives you your baba before you go ni-ni!"

With that childish sentence complete, she pointed down onto the ground, where Phillip found himself immediately and obediently sitting down upon, moving in unison Penny gently guided his head into her waiting lap.

Once comfortable lounging in the 6 year old's lap, Penny promptly popped out his pacifier and unceremoniously shoved the nipple of the practically dripping bottle into his mouth.

The formula tasted slightly bitter, and he had concentrated to keep himself from choking as he gulped down swallow after swallow.

While he drank, Penny petted his hair affectionately, commenting on what a good little baby girl she had and how well she was eating up her din-din.

As per usual, his cheeks were a fiery red as his mind searched further for a reason why he should not be in this situation.

At last the bottle was emptied, and before he could realize what was happening he let out a large belch, just as the nipple of the bottle was released from his lips.

"Good girls! Making burpies for her sitter!"

Penny praised with delight, as she set the bottle aside and stood up, beckoning for Philip to do the same.

Moving as if his body were no longer under control, he watched as she lead him over to a makeshift crib she had fashioned out of her bed, lining the edge of her bed with various toys and stuffed animals to attempt to simulate a crib.

"Now it's time to put the little baby to bed, ni-ni sweetie!"

She lowered the bars of the crib, pointing inside to instruct him to crawl inside. Whining, his cheeks still burning he did so, laying his head down onto a pillow.

"Don't forget your binky little one, sweet dreams!"

Almost reflexively, Philip began to suckle on the pacifier as the bars of the crib were raised. He felt a sudden fatigue washing over him, as if the playtime and everything they had done together leading up to this point had actually tired him out.

He brought the blanket closer to his chin, snuggling down onto the mattress as he faded into sleep. He mumbled something into the pacifier, something along the lines of not feeling tired at all.

Penny giggled, skipping out of the room before turning around, and quietly closing the door behind her.

Right before she shut it, she whispered, "Goodnight sweetie, thanks for playing!" before shutting the door with a click.

Epilogue

Philip blearily opened his eyes. What met his gaze was the sight of the girlish bedroom that he had been playing in just a few hours before.

He blinked a few times, readjusting his vision as the room came into focus once again. He looked around the room in slight confusion.

Wasn't he supposed to be doing something with Penny?

He frowned, suckling on the pacifier bulb still lodged in his mouth as his diaper crinkled loudly as he sat up in bed.

Baby... babysitting?

He looked down, seeing the frilly pink dress and feeling the thick, cushioning feeling of the diaper resting beneath his bottom.

A yawn escaped him, causing his pacifier to drop onto his lap as he rubbed his eyes, feeling as though he were still somehow asleep.

The door opened, and suddenly the sound of his mother talking to his aunt could be heard coming from the doorway.

"Oh yes, I know Philip can be quite the handful sometimes. But you know, what can you do about kids these days."

Before he was able to react properly, the door opened and Penny burst through the door.

"Oh! You're awake baby, your Mommy is here to pick you up from babysitting! You're going home now!"

Before he had finished processing the information, the door opened wider and his mother stood in the doorway, shaking her head side to side with a broad smile on her face.

"Well, well, well it looks like a certain little princess just woke up from her nap! I wonder what kind of mischief Penny is going to tell me that you got up to today, huh missy?"

She strode forward and popped the pacifier that had fallen into his frilly lap back into his mouth, gently stroking his hair as she tut-tutted over him.

"My goodness you really must have been a tired little girl, huh? Are you ready to go home now after Penny did such a good job babysitting for me?"

Philip was unable to respond, something told him that his mother usually did not talk to him in such a manner.

As pleasant as it felt to be doted over as much as she was doing, it almost felt like he might be a little too old for this kind of treatment.

Feeling confused, tired, and the slight urge to pee. He was about to open his mouth to respond when a sudden warmth began to grow on the front of his diaper.

He looked down, his cheeks reddening suddenly as he realized that he was now wetting uncontrollably into the front of his diaper.

Penny giggled, pointing with her finger as her other hand covered her mouth as she exclaimed.

"Look! Philly's had a wittle accident in her diaper!"

Upon the conclusion of this statement, Philip felt almost as if he were about to cry. It truly had been an accident, he had noticed a slight twinge in his bladder upon waking up but nothing prepared him for the fact that he apparently had lost complete control.

As the front of his diaper swelled to a larger, more pronounced size and the color of the rainbow ponies turned into a more yellowish tinge.

Reaching over his mother gently felt the front of his now exposed padding, gently squishing it with her fingers before placing a finger inside the lining of the front of his diaper and checking the inside for wetness.

"I think my little princess really soaked this one! Here sweetie, let's take you home and get you changed into a fresh diaper. I've already got all your stuff in the car. Hop up sweetie!"

With surprising strength his mother scooped him up into her arms, placing a protective yet firm hand underneath his bottom as she lifted him up.

Helpless to stop her, the poor sissified baby could only look behind his mother's shoulder back at Penny, who wore a particularly proud expression.

She beamed at him, waving with both hands and yelling.

"Bye bye baby girl! See you later!"

His mother stepped out of the door of his aunt's house and headed towards the car, humming under her breath as she opened the sliding door to his van.

"There we are, now let's buckle you up into your kiddy seat."

Looking behind him Phil saw to his confusion that a large baby seat with a particularly robust looking harness was now installed, the straps open and waiting for somebody to be placed inside.

With a crinkle and a slight squelching noise, his bottom was deposited into the waiting seat. Pulling the straps over his limbs, the buckles clicking into place giving him a strong sense of security.

Still feeling confused, embarrassed, and slightly sleepy the poor oversized baby could only suckle on his pacifier helplessly as he watched his mom walk up to the driver's seat.

He blinked his eyes slowly, everything was beginning to feel too complicated and confusing to him. He yawned once again, without even realizing it wetting a little bit more into the front of his diapers as his eyelids grew heavy.

He had a feeling that something still wasn't all that right, but with the comfort of the harness keeping him in place as his Mommy peeled out of the driveway, he had a feeling that everything would be alright.

Just before he fell asleep once again, his mother spoke softly to him, as if attempting to further lull him into a sense of security.

"Now I know you get all fussy when your diaper gets soggy and you don't get changes for a bit princess, but I promise that once we get home I'll run you a nice, warm bath and make you a baba, okay sweetie?"

Philip wanted to respond, but that would have required taking the pacifier out of his mouth. That was something that he really did not want to do.

The sissy baby simply let out a sigh of acknowledgement, and snuggled down deeper into his harnessed seat. A nap sounded just about perfect right now.