#honestly i dont really care what my friends say about any of my problems when i complain about it or don't complain but for strangers?

[cables-and-wires]

everytime someone says something like 'im so sorry i cant imagine being you with your disabilities oh man' they are legally required to send me 5 dollar

[staryuee]

Hii friend <3

I dont know really know if requests are still open but i wanted to ask if you could do any genshin characters with a rude s/o?

If not you're always aloud to delete the request :)

HOW YOU MAD AT ME, ‘CUZ I’M CUNT, BITCH?

꒰warnings꒱ cursing…obviously LOL

⠀꒲ ` synopsis . . . you wouldn’t call yourself rude just…”free-spirited” and liberal in your word choices~! ^_−☆

⠀꒲ ` characters . . . eula, xiao, thoma, ei, furina, navia, wriothesley

⠀꒲ ` notes . . . if i had a victorian era shilling for the amount of times my friend has called me rude after i’ve made a comment about something i would be the next ebenezer scrooge (⊙_⊙)

EULA — 优菈

now while eula would normally abhor at the foul language and insults that so easily spew from your precious lips, she actually can’t help but be oddly bemused.

i mean her expectations for linguistics are awfully high, one mustn’t speak with little eloquence but your brashness was oddly…charming, and refreshing in a way. you weren’t afraid to offend people, and simply enjoyed the motto of “i won’t apologise for what i said, i’ll apologise for how it made you feel.”

eula is of course someone who’s treated like the poster-woman for the concept of rudeness given her past and current feigned ego, so honestly you sort of make her feel better about herself — not in a negative way, in the way that she just simply doesn’t feel that lonely anymore.

if anyone has so much as a word to speak against you due to something you’ve said, they can speak to her first. the entirety of teyvat is allowed to shudder if she so much as so breathes, but when it comes to you? vengeance will be severed with a side of wine.

XIAO — 魈

stop. please. xiao is already overwhelmed enough by the varieties of his duties, all his patrolling — and now he has to make sure his lover isn’t in an argument with someone or being threatened to literal death.

he frankly doesn’t really care about the way you speak, sure it’s surprising at first since the majority of people in liyue hold themselves in a way that seems a bit more…calm, but then again sometimes that within itself can be seen as a rude attempt at pacification of genuine feelings.

you’ve never been mean or rude to him, directly at least, so he literally doesn’t care how brutal or venomous your words are, so long as you don’t get yourself in too much trouble. people haven’t seen the yaksha so an edge whenever a person opens their mouth since, well, ever.

he’s never brought up your attitude or personality; he loves you wholly, even if some parts of you are a bit more prickly than rosy.

THOMA — 托马

“haha, they were just joking!” you ticked off another five on your little notepad with a careful swoosh of your pen.

thoma has had to repeat that very phrase so much to the point you’ve been keeping a safe tally on a notepad of whenever he says it. to be honest, you don’t even believe five can be multiplied this many times…

your rudeness and foul language comes as an innate package, and thoma has no problem in neatly tying that package up with a little bow to placate whoever you managed to horribly offend that day. you fear that one day, if thoma isn’t there, you’ll find yourself being interrogated by kujo sara, maybe in a more lucky scenario heizou, herself.

“thoma can you do this f—“

“no.”

“i— wasn’t asking you??”

“you didn’t need to, now fuck off (๑･̑◡･̑๑). don’t be incompetent and you wouldn’t have to ask someone else to constantly do shit for you.”

RAIDEN EI — 影

if not directed to herself directly, she finds you absolutely amusing. she literally cannot be a spokesperson against rudeness after her uhum many self-made and self-fulfilled tragedies, plus she herself can be rather verbally off putting therefore, she has little problems with how you address others.

she does, however, keep a very keen eye on you to make sure you don’t stir up trouble with the wrong crowd.

but, hey! the great thing about dating a highly revered archon is the fact literally no-one will speak out against you.

“[name] told me to kill myself when i said hi in the morning…” and guess what? all of a sudden they have a long voyage to the fiery volcanoes of natlan planned out. criticism is only allowed if it’s aimed at her, not you — you’re basically an extension of her, if anyone so much so demeans you because of your attitude, it’s almost like they’re disrespecting the electro archon herself.

that’s a crime the citizens of inazuma have long learned the lesson of.

FURINA — 芙宁娜

she loves you purely for the theatrics and dramatics you always managed to find yourself in. it always seems like drama follows you wherever you simply step — and hey, she’s an actress, it’s no wonder she’s so easily charmed and swayed with the way your voice rings out blunt responses like it were second nature.

and to be fair, she’s a massive instigator of conflict. on the sidelines of course. so when you perhaps “accidentally” rub someone the wrong way, she can’t help but use sarcasm to throw fuel into the fire and watch the hellish flames burn as she kicks back with a cup of tea and a slice of cake (you know, like a true mirror to marie antoinette)

i think your duo would be even funnier and more undoubtedly chaotic if you have british humour and or slang equipped because let’s be so real if this was modern furina would force neuvillette to act like her roadman guard-dog while she sold 50p sweets during break time to the year 8s. throw in a little “yute” or “op” and she has heart eyes all over you (i promise this is all for the sake of comedy…)

NAVIA — 娜维娅

the best part of being in a relationship is being able to chat shit about anyone and everything, because well, you’re each-other’s everything already, why rely on the kindness of strangers for validation?

you and navia do the thing where you’ll subconsciously glance at each-other from the corners of your eyes when someone (or people) say some dumb silly shit. the problem being, neither of you can keep quiet and immediately will begin giggling and will make it inevitably worse by whispering to one another “stop!” and “don’t laugh—“ while holding your mouths to stifle yourselves.

this leads to people being rather nervous to speak to navia when you’re around. usually, navia is very friendly and softly spoken; often she’ll be a rather happy-go-lucky and caring girl who smiles no matter what — of course this doesn’t mean she’ll allow people to walk all over her, but hey she believes in second chances — but when you’re around…people will loiter around creepily before gathering the courage to ask for help or whatever they need.

navia is at heart however, a very loving and respectful person so she will remind you of when you’ve stepped out of line. sometimes rudeness is just an innate quality that people have and it’s sometimes not intended out of malice; even petty things like lateness or speaking out of turn counts as “rudeness”, and navia is here to either make excuses up for you or to defend you from criticism ☆〜（ゝ。∂）

WRIOTHESLEY — 莱欧斯利

oh he absolutely eats this shit up. every argument, insult, fight etcetera you’ve ever had is kept in a personal file somewhere in his cabinet just for memories sake. wriothesley’s life is already quite dramatic and hectic as it can be, the fortress of meropide could honestly sometimes be described as a form of circus within itself especially if you’re involved, but he revels in your antics nonetheless.

you’re literally so fucking hilarious, each time he hears those heavy doors heave open beneath him he just KNOWS shit has gone down and you’re about to dramatise it for him live.

you best believe he’s an instigator the same way furina is; whispering to you and then giggling when you use his encouragement as some sort of reference while you practically spit venom at the person who’s unfortunately become your centre of focus.

he won’t allow you to stir up too much trouble in the fortress of meropide but being his partner you get the perk of not getting into nearly as much trouble as you would if you were one of the criminals down in the fortress (unless you are then…well you’re special so it doesn’t matter!)

©STARYUEE do not copy, steal or repost ♡ ᴜsᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ʙᴇ ɪʜᴇᴀʀᴛɢᴀɴʏᴜ

[pinkpigtailsprincess]

𝜗𝜚 ݁ ˖ The Advice Column Issue No.1 ; How to deal with fake friends while balancing school life 🎀🧁

Hii Dolls!!!⭐️ This is officially the first issue of my Brand new segment The Advice Column!!!! and i chose the topic fake friends bc as someone who’s had an alarming amount of fake friends in the past i can definitely give endless advice in this topic and its a collab with the @honeytonedhottie !! bc i thought she could also give so really good advice!!🎀⭐️

Are you struggling with keeping up in your studies? worried if your friends are talking behind ur back? Stressed? Feeling like school and socials are just to much??? DONT WORRY!! Dolly n Honey are gonna save the day!! 🎀⭐️

Section 1 ; Honey!!🍯

how to balance ur school and social life (in bullet points) !! 🎀🧁

- make a list of priorities and stick to it like its a handbook

- practice saying no to events and saying no to excessive studying, the key is to find an equilibrium

- combine social and academic events

- make sure to use ur time wisely and do whats important first, so that then u can have loads of time for ur social life!

Section 2 ; Dolly! 🎀

No.1 ; Stand up for yourself!! ⭐️

if ur so called “friend” is constantly make smart remarks about you,scrutinizing you for the smallest thing,being passive aggressive or really just trying to hurt your feelings always stand up for yourself and never let insult like that because that shows that you have no self respect and then they’re gonna just keep doing it set clear boundaries and don’t be a doormat never let this person/people walk all over you , if you didn’t appreciate something they said don’t take shit from them address and make sure it never happens again

No.2 ; spotting a secretly fake friend⭐️!

now there’s obviously “friends” that you can spot from a mile away that they’re definitely toxic but theres also a certain type of friend that could be the sweetest to ur face but secretly talk shit behind ur back and its honestly not that hard to spot one of these “friends” so here are some characteristics of ‘the secretly fake friend’

- never sticks up for you

- constantly lying

- at time can be very passive aggressive

- will tell you that someone was talking about you and not defend you at all

- will make you feel like a bad friend even if they’re wrong in the situation

- if you’ve ever confronted them on their behavior and they say they’re sorry but then repeats the same actions

- lets their other friends talk shit about you

- HUGE VICTIM COMPLEX!

these kinds of fake friends are tricky bc you really can’t spot them at first and then it can be harder to cut them off which brings me to my next point

No.3 CUT THEM OFF !!⭐️

listen i know its hard to let go of these people at first im mean I’ve had to do it multiple times but i swear it gets sooo much easier to not have these people in ur life its way better to have no friends than a bunch of friends thats secretly hate you don’t stay caught up on toxic people like this its a waste of ur own peace and well being , block them,stop following them,stop talking to them have NOTHING to do with these people/person

No.5 ; Ur not special !!

now this title is a bit alarming but what i mean by that is if you have a friend that’s constantly talks down about people for no reason whether it be their friends or someone they know and im not talking about the standard gossip talk bc tbh everyone gossips but im talking about like drags them through the mud calls them mean names and purposefully spreads rumors about other people they’ll do it to do you as well ur not special i doesn’t matter what this person is telling you they’ll talk about any and everyone it doesn’t matter people like this do not care

No.4 ; Being Un-phased !! ⭐️

now after you cut them off either gonna

A. make it seem like they’re innocent and have been nothing but nice to you and try and make you feel bad

B. Act like theirs beef when in reality theres not they just want a reason to start a problem

C. to the standard mean girl remarks side eyes,whispers,random pointing and slightly laughing, or even in some cases talk loudly about you but indirectly

now in any of these situations never let it bother you show no reaction these kinds of people feed off ur fear of them shows no reaction when it comes to things like this and you can also do it back side eye them back,give them weird looks back now im definitely not saying be just like them but play their game don’t let disrespect like this slide and i know how hard it can be especially since these are people ir support be close with but i promise making friends that actually care about you is WORLDS BETTER!!! you’ll have such a peace of mind and being able to make friend that actually care about you is such a freeing feeling!!!!

Reminders!!! 🎀🍯

- they’re opinions don’t matter

- these people are no above you in any way shape or form

- stress is normal don’t let it get to you !!

- you deserve much better friends

- it normal to feel sad after cutting them off

- this person/these people don’t deserve you!!!

- you got thiss!!!

[stuck-in-the-ghost-zone]

HIII THABK U FOR THE TRIVIA AND ASHE SONG before i take forever 2 answer those or forget here is a blank ticket to please please talk about prime defenders and their AWFUL emotional literacy and processing skills i would literally love to read that essay so much ive also been thinking about it incessantly. big eyes staring up at u.png. ok ok peace out GOODNIGHT !!!! <33

i lied actually im not going to bed im judt thinking about this ans listening to St. John on a loop now. hello catkiss.gif i forgot how youve filled me with so much joy. that cat is so fuckign cute

anyway. hi :) prime defenders huh. this is gonna be less of an essay and more of a sleepy ramble but ohhh i have so many thoughts. they all process things so differently and none of them are good at it they all need therapy so bad. ms.g where is the hero therapy why didnt you build that into w.a.t.c.h ma'am

vyncent is probably the best at actually processing things out of all of them, he just internalizes everything to the point where he wont talk about it unless hes pushed past the breaking point. vyncent is actually very.. emotionally intelligent? i want to say mature but that feels like im singling him out because hes the oldest. i just feel like because he grew up on Fauna and had to be in basically survival mode in a world full of monsters trying to kill you.. that makes a person grow up quicker than they should. i think vyncent had a good childhood and for the most part his parents took good care of him but just.. living in that world doesnt seem like it leaves room for a whole lot of expressing emotions. vyncent is good at quick analysis of a situation, but unless a problem directly interferes with the current goal he doesnt externalize it to everyone else. but bottling up his feelings and emotions just builds up pressure over time until something like the lich makes him blow up and let it all out at once, usually in a dramatic monologue format bc condi is really good at those god damn it. also they played off the fact that vyncent said all of that to the lich and then missed his attack as a funny thing but i like to think of it as. he got too overwhelmed w his emotions and lashed out too soon it made his fighting messy. vyncent is so angry and honestly after what hes been through he deserves to be !!!!

william wisp. my boy. god hes just like me fr so much so that it physically hurts sometimes. anyway. i always think back to the scene where theyre all in the cabin talking about themselves/sharing backstories and william keeps desperately trying not to talk about himself. the fact that hes so ashamed of his powers he hides wisp form every time. two of his powers are LITERALLY a) turning invisible and b) turning intangible, usually as an excuse to leave whatever situation hes in ("accidentally" falling through the floor at opportune moments in season 1) . theres. a thing that happens at the end of episode 13/beginning of epidode 14 that youre really close to and i wont spoil yet but god it has to do with this so extremely much please come back to my inbox when you get there. youll know what it is trust me. um. yeah. so anyway. i think a lot of this comes from a place of. he doesnt want anyone to be scared of him. williams not stupid hes incredibly smart and insightful he knows his powers are objectively SCARY. hes scared of himself constantly, he doesnt want anyone else to feel that way about him, so he shifts focus whenever those aspects of himself are brought up because if someone were to think about it for any amount of time theyd realize the truth that hes scary and dangerous to be around (<< william logic. hey remember how one of the reasons he originally left deadwood was because the monsters there were attracted to the wisps and therefore Him so he left to keep his friends/family out of danger)

i think a lot about williams death and the immediate aftermath, i dont know how much you actually know and how much of this comes later but . how does he go home after waking up from that. his parents know about his powers, so they MUST know what happened. what do you think he told them when he god home muddy and dirty and broken and probably bloody after being missing for. god knows how long. how does he look his mother in the eyes and tell her her little boy is dead. but hes also not because hes standing right in front of her. how the fuck do you think he felt the first time he went into wisp form and saw his body laying there !!! of course he wouldnt want to talk about that!!!! youre gonna have to pry william wisps emotions from his cold dead hands !!!!!!!

dakota's response to the ashe situation was to run away in the woods and do nothing but train for 10 months. he didnt think about it for 10 months. i dont even have a whole lot to say about dakota other than like. stunned silence whenever his inability to process trauma is brought up because grizzly does such an incredible job at being like "you ask dakota how hes doing and his face is just blank" << paraphrased actual quote from an episode i cannot remember which one. either 11 or 12 ?

also because im thinking about him im including ashe in this. we didnt get to see a whole lot of his canon reactions to extreme emotional situations so a lot of this is just coming from My Mind but ashe seems like hed be the type to repress a lot of his emotions too. being alone in your house/in your room for extended periods of time will do that to a guy. i think he feels a lot of things and will probably very openly cry/scream/get angry when hes alone but as soon as he knows another person is there he can immediately flip the switch to turn it all off like nothing happened. very much a deadpan "im fine." if someone asks how hes doing, even if hes got like. the remainder of tear tracks down his face. cannot physically express his emotions in the presence of someone else

[11x13kyle]

that one argument that nick and stav had on cum town as the boys

kyle: we're able to leave in peace. i go off to whatever i'm gonna do, cartman dies--

cartman: no???

kyle: kenny lives off his situationship's journalism money until she gets tired of that and that ends.

kenny (their guest that invited himself on this particular episode): oh i think she probably is already!

cartman: i'll live a long, fruitful life, raising children and grandchildren on a meadow with a farm, fresh berries--

kyle: it's so funny that you think that's how your life is gonna go.

cartman: it will, dude.

kyle: it's--you're NOT gonna get control of your weight, it's gonna end tragically.

cartman: you are SUCH a hater

kyle: i'm not a HATER, i care about you--

cartman: no, you don't, you just wanna--you say bad, mean things to people to make them feel bad!

kenny: it's not mean!

kyle: it's not MEAN dude.

kenny: it's maybe a little--

kyle: if i was sitting here--look, if i was sitting here smoking five and a half packs of cigarettes a day, my eyes are yellow, i'm having tumors removed from my mouth--

cartman: that was a random tumor that had nothing to do with my weight--

kyle: and--and i was like "i'll stop smoking when i'm 45!"

cartman: that's not even what i'm saying, man--

kyle: at WORST this has taken five years off my life, i'll live all the way to 65

cartman: whatever bro

kyle: i can just continue to smoke--

cartman: you're a hateful little bitch--

kyle: chainsmoke cigarettes--

cartman: it's gonna be--i am gonna be bouncing my fucking children on my knee, my grandchildren, on a meadow, feeding them fresh berries--

kyle: you'll be lucky if you still HAVE a fucking knee! by whenever the time you think this is gonna happen.

cartman: you REALLY think you're not a hater?

kyle: yeah, i dont--

cartman: you in your heart believe you're saying something true and good to your friend right now?

kyle: i think it's like--

kenny: yeah, i--

kyle: no, i mean, if you want--honestly? i do think like.....like, yes, it may be harsh, but i do think you need to have some kind of like fucking wake up call. like what changes have you made that are like permanent changes?

cartman: i'm not fucking--first of all, i'm not talking about this on the fucking podcast.

kyle: why not?

kenny: but you are--

cartman: huh?

kyle: why not?!

cartman: because it's not--i'm not trying to fucking talk about it on the podcast!

kyle: not talk about what, like a DIET or whatever? i mean...

cartman: yeah, that's--it isn't funny, and also it's like, you're not HELPFUL--

kyle: most of the PODCAST isn't funny!

kenny: yeah, you guys get a couple good things in there that--

cartman: whatever, we're done, the podcast is over at this point, i'm not trying to fucking have this--

kyle: THIS episode is...

cartman: yes, i'm fine with that too, i've had a fucking terrible 40 minutes--

kyle: i mean this--but like do you not like--in no way is it--

kenny : we don't HAVE to talk about--

kyle: SHUT UP. is--in NO way there's like--there's no way to express any kind of, like, concern?

cartman: saying i'm going to DIE is not the way you--you don't know how to talk to people, that is your CENTRAL problem--

kyle: no but i mean--NO, hold on--

cartman: and--and this is not the way to talk to someone--

kyle: hold on, i've known you for YEARS and like--this didn't start with like "ohhh, you're going to die!" like...i've like WATCHED you lose teeth, you know, be bedridden...

cartman: that has NOTHING TO DO with having a fucking--that has nothing to do with fucking being fat, dude, losing teeth, are you kidding me?! it's a completely different dental thing! you also literally don't know how to fucking talk to anybody, it is not helpful the way you speak to me in ANY--like, you're not...HELPFUL, you're not fucking supportive in any way--

kyle: well, what's helpful? what's this, what's this--

cartman: sometimes you're a mean piece of SHIT and telling me i'm gonna fucking die over and over again is exactly that!

kyle: then what's like--what IS supportive, then?

cartman: uh, just fucking--what we're doing now, having a schedule so i can fucking plan my life and go to the gym and fucking eat well, that's supportive! the podcast--

kyle: no but like what's--what is the correct way to like express concern? if it's a problem where it's like my TONE is wrong, i mean i, like, sure i can EASILY change that or address it.

cartman: yes, your tone is wrong ALL the TIME, that's your personality!

kenny: that's the thing, it's coming from a place of love, though, it's not like--

cartman: it doesn't MATTER if it's coming from a place of love--listen--

kenny: he's not trying to--

cartman: i don't want this on the podcast!

kenny: he's not trying to be a dick--

cartman: can we just stop fucking having this--

kyle: we can cut--we can cut this--

cartman: but it's like, it's not--

kenny: but i mean there's people that like also are like--that care about you that listen to the show, i don't know, it's like not--

cartman: the show will never help me lose weight! the show is a fucking JOB. the only thing the show will do is get people to mock my weight, it's not gonna be fucking helpful, it's FINE i don't give a fuck, but i AM fucking--i have made a concerted effort--the last year of my life i was getting my fucking shit together for real and then i hurt my fucking foot and the last year has been a fucking incredibly unstable year for me, i'm not even talking on the mic anymore but it's like--it's been a HORRIBLE fucking year i had a fucking--hurt my foot, i had a fucking fight with my mom, like all this shit has been HORRIBLE--

[jame7t]

Can I ask if you use OBS for streaming? And also any tips for an aspiring streamy girl? *looks at you with the wettest eyes*

I do use OBS ! If youre not really familiar with it, its totally worth looking up some simple tutorials for. Once you can get a grasp on the program in general, its super modular and fun to mess around with. I think my biggest pieces of advice for streaming are like. 1: IGNORE those numbers queen. It can be super easy to see streamers with anywhere from 29-100 viewers and feel sucks about an average of like. 1-4. but literally anyone who uses twitch- or any platform- has to start there unless you're already situated on a different platform!

These are my average viewers from 2020- its taken me a long time to do anything on twitch, but its been a hell of a lot of fun, and its let me meet some of my best friends in the world because of it! Streaming is a great way to meet people, which brings me to point 2: Absolutely be careful who you meet! I've met a lot of really great people on the site- but as much as small streamers gotta stick together, there's some real stinkers out there who only want to 'network' with you. I won't pretend im BFFs with everyone I interact with on the platform- we're like neighbors <3- but I can confidently say I've never spoken to someone with intentions of clout chasing. The internet's the internet- stay safe out there lmao Ironically this becomes less of a problem the more you stream, you kinda learn to spot it, but back when I was at around 300 followers I absolutely had some incidents where people were playing some real booboo games to try get closer to me. Lots of streamers have promo channels in their respective discords- places you can link your stream when you're going live- just make sure you're an active-ish member of the community if you plan on doing that! Chatters are way more likely to stop by if they recognize you- and its pretty rude to be completely silent in 45 discords unless you're going live- 3: have fun!! Twitch is still just a hobby for me- its admittedly helped me out of a few rougher financial months at random points in the last few years- but im still very far away from making it my full time job in any capacity. Pace yourself- play games with your friends- and have fun! Worrying about growth and money is a pointless endeavor- because twitch will not help you grow! 4: Use Other Platforms: (as well, i mean) There's a lot of youtube videos and tutorials debating the best streaming site- "ahh heres why i left twitch forever vs aahhh heres why im leaving youtube forever" but it boils down to Sites Is Sucks ALWAYS. Forever. If you want to grow on twitch- or any site- make sure you're posting about your streams elsewhere too! Not JUST stream promo posts, but highlights and clips as well! If you can get some sort of editing software, subtitling them expands their reach a TON across the board, though it does take more time to subtitle them. People wont know what youre doing unless you tell them! Now, this does mean you might have to download the dreaded tiktok- I can't speak for the quality of that site in terms of getting people to watch streams; but twitch itself has sent me emails in the past recommending I post clips to tiktok. Plenty of streamers do it- use your best judgement, and what sites you think you can adapt to! Tiktok honestly might be better for getting your clips out there without a preexisting audience- when I first started streaming, I had 6000 followers on tumblr and my promo posts regularly got 1-4 notes- Nothing against those 6000; a promo post is tragically similar to an ad! Of course they wouldnt click it. They dont know how sweet and awesome and silly i am and how my friends mash me with hammers. Theyd want to see that. [The Promo Posts Were Also MID] Some of these things might sound weirdly specific or erratic but its 1 AM and im just recounting some random knowledge ive gained- none of this is a science of course, people might swear the opposite for some of these things. But! Have Fun

[louissatturi]

CELLBIT AWNSERING TO STUPID BACKLASH ABOUT THE ONE-SHOT ON DISCORD

"I enter to see people's reaction wait and talk a little bit, i just read a bunch of out of nowhere toxicity because im doing something special with New friends.

This one-shot is heppening before the 3 spin-off because EDM (enigma of fear) delayed and that is out of my control, we are trying hard to create something interesting and yall who say that "support" the thing are only slendering because it has people yall dont know or because is in a languege yall arent fluent, althought it was already clarified that i are un search of a Professional translator team to maximize acessibility as much as possible

I feel sad with this reaction, and all i can say is : it it dosent interest you, dont consume it

Yall arent oblied to stay here, and are welcomed to give space to people that are actually interesting on the things instead of hating something that has the effort of dozens of people"

"Innit?, we ware already waiting/hoping* for that,they think that everything from ordem is too expand the universe but maybe he (Cellbit) just wanted to play RPG with his friends innit?"

Exactly, if I do spin-offs expanding on the lore and adding diferent layers, the problem is "its too complicated it was better when it was just friends playing RPG".

If i do a really short special to play with friends in getting to know, it will be "bad because it wont be relevant".

Honestely,Im only here because i care about the personal oppnions of the people in here (discord) and always come to check out what yall are talking about,I could just ignore it and go to work and everything would end up Alright anyways.

I just feelt sad seeing this type of reaction when people are working their ass off*, and who many doors this will open, enable a live-action, animation or whatever thing with the product in ENGLISH and shows results and looks way easier.

But anyways, because it was to do with minecraft and gringo creators, its a huge problem to some people in here(discord). Honestly i just really greatful for the people defending and supporting the thing (ordem paranormal), thats crucial for us to keep going having energy to do all off this.

It would be 10.000x easier to just stream minecraft 12 hours a day and gain a fuck ton off money without doing any other project, i do this because i LOVE it and want to keep doing even more.

Again, thanks for the support, and lets give your best to surprise everybody again with this special that is going to be rad* ❤️ im sure that will be really fucking fun"

TRANSLATOR NOTES

* he dosent use such crude languege when saying this, he says "trabalhando mais que nada" (working more then nothing) but because it dosent exist in english i used this cruder expression

* animal can be used as rad in brazilian portuguese

[corvidcall]

Fascinated by your sarah z hate- would love to hear more about this if you’d like to share. My experience of her is just that mediocre Homestuck vid or something she made.

lmao yeah sure i guess i can expound on it

i should preface this by saying that i dont think shes like. a bad person. and i dont have some secret knowledge of problematique things shes done that we should all Cancel her for.

tl;dr i just think her videos are really bad. she keeps making videos about stuff that i was there for and then being wrong about them, and it drives me crazy. on top of that, it just rubs me the wrong way to make your whole brand "the lady who talks about tumblr"

like, i think her homestuck video sucks (and i think its very funny that she admitted that she only spent a week making it, but ALSO got really defensive when people said she was wrong about stuff. like, i think the way whatpumpkin and andrew hussie responded to her video was Bad but also that doesnt retroactively defend the original video from being poorly researched and, in my opinion, in bad taste. it was weird to make a video where you talk about all the controversy about hs^2 not that long after the whole project got cancelled because too many of the trans women working on it were receiving daily death threats)

and i think the mcelroys video sucks (that was the last one i watched before i gave up entirely. its really long and very boring, and basically is just her listing a bunch of stuff they did that people had problems with, which essentially puts "travis was annoying on twitch" on the same level of seriousness as "taz: graduation used a lot of harmful native american stereotypes". i genuinely am not sure what the point of this video was supposed to be, because it feels like its her reading a tumblr callout post. also she was wrong about taz: amnesty. the ending WAS foreshadowed, it did NOT come out of nowhere, she just wasnt paying attention.)

but the onceler fandom video is honestly the absolute pits. i am still friends with a lot of the people that i was in the onceler fandom with, and i genuinely havent met a single former onceslut who thought her video was good, or the least bit accurate. her thesis basically boils down to that the onceler fandom was just a bunch of young teen girls projecting fantasies onto a nonthreating decently attractive fictional guy, which isnt that weird and people are only making a big thing about it because they hate teenage girls. and her conclusions arent WRONG, per say, since people DO hate teen girls and this is a thing theyre known to do... its just. thats literally not what the onceler fandom was at all?? first off, when i got into it i was 17 and i was the youngest person i knew by far. almost everyone i saw in the fandom were in their 20s, and a lot of them were not girls at all. and as far as any of US remember, the thing sustained the fandom wasnt 13 year old girls exploring their nascent sexualities, it was people using the barest pretense to make OCs, and then craft stories with and about their friends OCs. it was a really cool unique experience because it was a fandom for the things the fandom built. a lot of the people i knew had never watched the movie The Lorax at all, or didnt really care about it one way or another, but DID get really invested in the dynamic between Swag and One, or got really invested in the two big AUs the fandom had. By the time i got there, most people had kinda moved away from the canon onceler anyway, and were focused almost exclusively on the AUs (there was a high school AU and a zombie apocalypse AU, and then during the summer the high school AU blogs would do a child summer camp AU. i liked the zombie one best because i love melodrama, but the high school one was most popular). i know she was IN the onceler fandom (allegedly...) but as far as i can tell, she was just there at the very start, because it changed WILDLY even just a few months after its inception. and there's no way anyone who saw the fandom that I was actually in would make the sweeping statements about it that she did.

broadly, her videos are too unfocused and not really well-written. her one on Oppa Homeless Style was a genuinely good video!! I know she CAN do good videos!! But so many of her more fandom-focused videos dont really seem to have a thesis beyond "this happened" or maybe even "this was kinda weird right?". like what is the viewer supposed to take away from the video about the mcleroys? that they made a podcast that was really popular and then got less popular? why did that take you TWO HOURS to say? and even when she does have a strong thesis, its always muddied by the fact that she feels compelled to add in really long, boring digressions. I think the video about All or Nothing was good, and made an interesting point about how pan and ace people are really starved for meaningful rep, but i dont understand why she felt compelled to recount the entire plot of the webseries someone made? what did that contribute to the thesis? its like shes reading a wikipedia page, and not like. an actual ESSAY. that someone structured to convey a POINT.

but overall i just take umbrage with her whole "tumblr historian" shtick. i think its kind of gross to put really niche (generally woman-dominated) subcultures on display so people can come gawk at the freaks. ive heard the defense that "she IS a fandom person!! these videos are FOR fandom people!!" but 1. if its supposedly supposed to be for me and NOT an audience of people unfamiliar with the thing shes talking about, then there would be no need to spend so long explaining what everything is, and 2. i can at least say, in my own subjective experience, that i said basically all this to my sister, who told me that thats why she likes sarah z at all, because the videos let her come gawk at all the fandom freaks on tumblr. so its cool that sarah z is giving the person who bullied me my whole life (specifically because the way i engaged with media was too cringe) more reasons to bully me for being cringe. big preesh sarah. glad youre making money off of the free content all of us put out, and even more glad that youre profiting by taking all that free content and presenting it to a largely hostile and judgemental audience who already thinks im a fucking idiot. why dont you make a video about my popular hamlet post next, since you seem to make videos exclusively about things i did.

anyway if i want to watch video essays about fandom, i'll watch princess weekes, whose videos are substantive and not... idk very juvenile. not that i think there cant be more than one youtuber talking about fandom!!! its just that sarah z's videos are mid at best and actively bad at worst, so im not gonna bother.

(all that being said, i occasionally look at her blog and reblog stuff. while shes working down in the tumblr mines looking for content to steal, she does frequently find some decent posts to reblog)

[swaglet]

chiming in on the gender convo! from 12-14 i was a pretty staunchly transmed kid. i identified as a transguy for a little over a year, i wore a binder, the whole social transition schtick. how you say you felt like an alien, like you just wanted to be a person, and seeing pretty much only feminine women…. yeah. i oscillate on being angry over it all, so i'm curious if you have any advice on... well, not giving a fuck lol. i admire the sympathy you express. sometimes i feel myself getting more bitter and it's hard not to with people insisting i'm a closet-man for cutting my hair short and old friends cutting me off for insisting on sex-based reality.

AHHH i meant to respond to this earlier but i went to my final and then came home and napped violently immediately afterwards.

as for the advice part i honestly dont know. i think i have been very lucky to not only grow up around other trans people my age from preteen age even to right now who shared a lot of my opinions with me; back in the day, it was like... uniformly insane and delusional to suggest you aren't actually your birth sex or to suggest biological sex doesn't even exist at all. all my current trans and nb friends, both mtf and ftm, are all very reasonable people who think very similarly to me about biological sex and transition (both social and medical) and misogyny and we all talk about it very often. i don't know if it's just because i got lucky or because i was childhood friends with a large portion of them and we developed our thoughts and opinions by bouncing them off of each other or if it's because i'm so outspoken today about misogyny and female liberation and they respect me for speaking about it as much as i do. idk my friends are all very slay and i love them. we openly talk about my detransition and my dysphoria, we talk about the pros and cons of transition and the health problems we have gotten or are scared of getting, talk abt our feelings about gender and society and ourselves very often. i definitely am very lucky. i suppose all i can do is reassure you that not everyone will hate you or cut you off just for expressing your beliefs; when i detransitioned years ago and my opinions on gender changed i was so worried that people would hate me and cut me off, thinking i was hateful or something, but nothing of the sort happened. a few people did but really they were a minority. but again i really am lucky and am surrounded by people who arent crazy and dont deny biological sex and the reality of sex based oppression

as for the sympathy part a few years ago i became really obsessed with figuring out how to experience empathy like a normal person so i didnt feel as broken and now its something i practice everyday and it almost comes naturally. frankly my trans friends understand me in a way that most people dont so i feel very close to them and comfortable around them. i just remind myself that we are all dealing with life in the only ways we know how and nobody exists in a vacuum and all i can do is express how much i care about them and raise any concerns i have about their wellbeing and they can do the same for me. the way i see it, if someone cuts me off and hates me for talking about how sex based oppression is a real issue that affects me and every biologically female person on earth, then they dont deserve to be in my life anyway and wont do me anything but harm if i keep them in my life. it would be for the best i suppose. thats something i stand by very firmly in my life; if i express my core beliefs/values respectfully and honestly and in good faith, and someone decides that they dont want me in their life anymore because of that, then we were incompatible as friends or partners or anything. i dont want to waste my time fighting with people and making myself miserable, i want to focus on the things and causes and people i care about.

i try my best to be patient with people no matter what unless theyre intentionally trying to be disrespectful or hurt me; i know that in most situations, i would love to be given the benefit of the doubt, so i try to do the same for other people. if someone says that me dressing 'like a man' or cutting my hair short or not behaving femininely enough somehow made me not a woman, i just ask them "why?" and see what they really think about it and explain the way i see it to them.

really, the way i cope with it all on a day to day basis is reminding myself that most of the people i come across in my life act the way they act and think the way they think because they truly believe that it is the right thing to do, they live their own lives in a way that they think is good and helpful just like i do. we just may not see eye to eye on what is good and what is helpful and that is just a part of life. there are people whose minds i can change, people who i can inspire and inform, and people who will never ever change their minds no matter what you do or say for them. and i also tell myself that no matter what people think about me and my "gender presentation" and whether or not they think misogyny exists, that has no bearing on what i do with my life. they can be upset with me and they can hate me but i can do whatever i want just like they can.

sorry that was so long i rambled onnnn and on and on. my two biggest pieces of advice: 1) try your hardest to curate your own little bubble and grab onto it as hard as you can and DO NOT LET GO and 2) surround yourself with gnc people (whether they identify as trans or not) who will enthusiastically talk about this stuff with you and share opinions with you. they are out there they exist and i hope you can find them. i would fly you out here to hang out with me and my posse if i could

[xplrvibes]

i canttt with sam’s hubris!! it’s either that, or the fact they need a filler with their content and aren’t bothering with, ya know, actually mediumship with trained ppl or witches tbh.

wish they’d delve into anything more but like that’s wasted breathe.

would love to hear ur thoughts/analysis w examples on sam’s hubris.

oh! and whatever that passive agressive that could come up with whoever ryan and shane are?? im always intrigued about what the guys could be like when challenged, because they dont really have anyone like that on.

If I gave my true thoughts on Sam and his hubris, I'd come back to a blog on fire lol.

Just know that I've always had my opinion on things like the challenges and the Sallie demon attachment thing, and they are what we would consider hot takes lol.

But as far as the passive aggressive is concerned, the closest example I can think of is the Miami series they did with Jake and Corey at the beginning of 2020. Jake was clearly over it all by then, while snc were hoping to take it a little more seriously. There is a point during the Miami Biltmore video where Jake is challenging them in some way and you can just feel the annoyance and tension through the screen, from both Sam and Colby. It was maybe the one interesting moment (besides Colby and his 21 past lives that has never been mentioned again lmao) in that whole series.

I think they have grown up a lot since then, and have better established themselves, their brands and their careers. They like to say that they are more open to skeptics now, and have brought people like Wilbur on who come into it being openly non-believing and they always manage to have a good time and sort of turn them around to at least being open to the paranormal.

Wilbur and other skeptics they've brought in in the past were novices to the ghost hunting community. snc were their guides. snc were the professionals, the adults in the room, the people setting the tone and controlling the situation and teaching the newbies.

They would not have that standing or power with Shane and Ryan.

Shane and Ryan are not novices to this genre in any way, shape or form. Snc would have absolutely no power in this situation; if anything, they would almost start out on a lower playing field than Shane and Ryan (on account of S&R would have 100% of the backing from the skeptics and debunkers, and Shane would be coming in already thinking they are idiots and ready to challenge them and prove that they are, in fact, idiots).

And I think that would be half the problem, right there. They would be off-kilter, not in control of the situation, and being met with scorn and disdain or at the very least, a patronizing tone from someone who has made it no secret that they don't respect them or find them reputable in any way.

It's gonna get their backs up.

Now, Sam is the one who truly does not do well with not having control in a situation; he's also the one that doesn't seem to do well with people who have differing viewpoints to his (part of that need for control), so my initial guess was that he would be the first to break and get passive-aggressive or challenging back, especially cause we all know how Colby and confrontation usually mix about as well as oil and water.

But then I started thinking about it more, and honestly, the one thing that seems to get Colby's back up as well, are people insulting his friends (especially Sam). And Colby's the guy who consistently gets into fights in clubs and barks at people for invading his space and considers himself the holder of drinks and caretaker of his friends. He's the one who once tweeted out "Say what you want about me, I don't care. But if you talk shit about my friends, we have a problem."

So...given all that, I honestly don't know which side of the snc braintrust is going to be the side that gives up on any pretense of niceties first and starts getting snippy; it could go either way.

But I do know two things: 1) this collab would probably not end with a friendship, and 2) it'll be a whole lot of passive-aggressive stuff and not any actual fighting involved lol.

[chappellrroan]

fave Gracie Abrams songs and albums and lyrics?

her minor ep is my favourite personally because that's how i got to know her and became a fan, as for songs two people, i know it won't work, will you cry?, right now, block me out, 21, friend, i miss you i'm sorry, unlearn, brush fire, mean it, stay, mess it up, for real this time, camden are my all time fav from her released songs.

as for lyrics there are two aspects that depends on determining if i love them, for example in i know it won't work, i love how she sings "it won't work like that, huh?" but lyrically i like "i am your ghost now your house is haunted" so you can guess. anyways i will give my fav lyrics from my fav songs now <3

two people - "i loved you so hard for a time i've tried to ration it all my life, we could go yellow to black overnight i take you for granted because you're mine" (it's long but yes yes this) ALSO "cause you know everything that could kill me"

already mentioned for i know it won't work

will you cry? - "now you walk through me with my heart heavy breaking my reverie i could die early with your arms around me would it not kill to say goodbye?" AND "it's kinda funny how it goes from all to nothing you have to laugh before you start to cry"

right now - "and i ended a friendship on the day that i left and though i really meant it, it still makes me upset" (OUCH TOO REAL)

block me out - "i think i am burning alive but nobody sees the fire cause when i open my mouth i seem to be stuck in silence" AND "plus after all this time i should be a pretty crier"

21 - "i see the look in your eye and i'm biting my tongue, you'd be the love of my life when i was young" and "i get a little bit alone and sometimes i miss you again, i'll be the love of your life inside your head"

friend - "and i hate the way you love and i hate that i still care funny how you feel like we could ever talk again, how could you ever think i'd be your friend?" (applies to SO many people atp this is my lifesong)

i miss you i'm sorry - "thought you'd hate me instead you called in, said i miss you, i caught it" and the whole bridge honestly because NOTHING HAPPENED IN THE WAY I WANTED EVERY CORNER OF THIS IS HAUNTED AND I KNOW YOU SAID WE'RE NOT TALKING BUT I MISS YOU, I'M SORRY, I DON'T WANNA GO THINK I WILL MAKE IT WORSE EVERYWHERE I GO LEADS ME BACK TO US (i am very passionate about this song sorry)

unlearn - "i keep bringing all my problems to a pillow fight" and "cause if i'm gonna learn how to love you i need to unlearn how to love too need to unlearn when it feels right OH MY GOD I AM TRYING"

brush fire - "then we become a brush fire, burning all the pain HOW CAN WE SURVIVE A DESERT WITHOUT RAIN?" and "boy you know what to say before i turn away you words hit me like a hard rain in L.A"

mean it - "holding onto thin lines until we just walk between them, getting so loud i can't pretend that i dont hear them, maybe that thing you said under your breath you mean it, i know you mean it"

stay - the whole chorus honestly because COULD YOU HOLD ME WITHOUT ANY TALKING? WE COULD TRY TO GO BACK TO WHERE WE STARTED I DON'T EVEN HAVE TO STAY I DON'T EVEN HAVE TO STAY BUT IF I WOKE UP WITH YOU IN THE MORNING I'D FORGET ALL THE WAYS WE'RE BROKEN I DON'T CARE IF YOU HAVE CHANGED I DON'T EVEN HAVE TO STAY

mess it up - "heard that you're happier hope you're sleeping well knowing i'm not, i am doing too much" and "and everytime i get too close i just go mess it up" AND "i keep thinking maybe if you let me back in we can make it better breaking every habit pull myself together you can watch it happen make it happen" (the mv has very special space in my heart btw)

for real this time - "a thousand times i got up to say goodbye i could be wrong but i think i'm for real this time"

camden - "self diagnosing till i'm borderline i will do whatever helps to sleep at night" and "somebody take over drive somebody notice how i'm trying" and "all of me, a wound to close but i leave the whole thing open i just wanted you to know i was never good at coping" (one of the best bridges ever)

[cryborgs]

thank u @archonfurina for the tag + questions! this was a v fun way for me to secretly pass time at work <3

‧₊˚ ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ soft ask game ‧₊˚ ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚

01. a character you love.

Lee Gyu-Hyuk. i think about him every day. i listen to songs that make me think of him and make lil music videos in my head. he is... what can i even say ㅠㅠ very vague general non-spoiler spoilers, but everyone in Buried Stars Game ™ has their issues and Gyu-Hyuk is no exception, but he works so hard to take care of others and he's so kind and caring IT DRIVES ME CRAZY ACTUALLY hahahaha i am SO normal about him...

02. your favourite food from your culture.

i have been pondering this for days and i just dont know TT i dont want to act like because i'm from the US i have no culture but also it's hard for me to figure out what our cultural foods are. umm i guess i really like pumpkin pie? also pizza my beloved. i know pizza is not exactly an american thing but also. the way we do it is, so. i shall count it. pizza my beloved

03. what your dream apartment / room / house is like.

ooh okay. it's definitely gotten a bit smaller as i've gotten older, but it'd be nice to have more room than i've got now. not to go toooo wild but i'd love a 3 bed 2 bath single level house with a garage/shed and a porch?? with enough room for both me + my partner to have nice pc setups. also barely related but... i want a nice desk so bad 😭 my dad had one that's sitting unused in my mom's house and i dont have room for it at my apartment but it's so nice and sturdy and i journal a ton and would fucking LOVE to have an actually nice space to do it

04. your personal style or aesthetic.

tried thinking about this on my own and could NOT come up with an answer, so i asked my sisters for their input and i got "stinking cute" and "turbo punk with pop overtones" so take those how you will

05. a happy memory.

when i was a teenager, most thursdays i would go to a roller skating rink with a few friends. we'd skate for hours and pester the dj to play marina and the diamonds songs. then afterwards we'd go to the huge 24-hour grocery store across the street and buy ice cream and/or doughnuts and we'd sit in the car eating and talking for hours.

06. your favourite way(s) to spend time.

i am. such a homebody. i like doing all sorts of things but i honestly love just being at home with my partner and playing video games. oh. also i love eating. it is a hobby <3

07. story behind your url / title / quote / description / icon.

cryborgs i believe kinda came from VIXX's "Error" mv, not any type of direct reference, but just the vibe. my blog title is a slightly weirdly translated line from We Best Love, a bl drama that infected my brain for a while in 2021 (i still love it ok im not over it). i never know what to put in my description so i usually just put the media i'm currently watching/playing but also i dont update it so it's almost always wrong 💀 annnnd my icon is my beloved Han Do-Yoon from Buried Stars Game ™...... i love him.....

08. something that comforts you or brings you joy.

i dont watch it regularly anymore, but Running Man. regardless of what bad things are going on, i know i can turn on an old ep and be happy for 1.3 hours. it's gotten me through so much school stress, family issues, and general mental unwellness, it'll always have a place in my heart.

09. what you're looking forward to.

i started writing this a week ago and the thing i was looking forward to already passed soo um,. i really don't have anything too notable right now? i am looking forward to being done with my 6pm meeting -_-

10. something else that's important to you.

hmmmmmm i have this brain problem where sometimes i get pedantic about the meaning of words so right now i am like, "important" ?? what is it,,,, for somethign to be "important" .... anyways i think journaling is something that probably fits the bill? it's something i enjoy doing and i really like having a written record of things to look back on, and being able to see how i felt about things in the moment they were happening. i also journal about video games a lot and it's so fun to look back at the times Before big twists and reveals... ah my innocence...

[elialys]

OMG im so 🥺

That i have to talk...I'm in shock !

How can someone like Torv and not follow her teachings? Love others as they are!Yes she always said quote Helen is Anna Torv "I love you just the way you are"it should always be people's motto!

And another quote she left this year EMPATY...OK you Dont like the person but you have to respect.Then its ok leave...why criticize something if we have no comparison?

You don't do anything so so wrong unforgivable to a human and everyone sometimes make mistakes!

I am sometimes surprised and outrageous by people pointing the finger só easily at small things that they perceive differently and be silent or quiet at big problems around them or even looking at themselves! I'm just saying one thing.  Of all of us.... ALL of us, YOU were the one who dedicated the most time YEARS -DECADES, had the most patience (countdown the minutes of the 2 years without premieres? ) and fought for each series, each Anna Torv's work(things like uniting fans, posting videos, talking about her, supporting her unconditionally... Fauxlivia is still your protégé, right?🤭and fighting Helen Dale dont stop )... and for me it is extremely commendable and I admire you immensely for never stopping fighting and share Anna Torv!

Your neurodivergent brain may have flaws...but What brain don't have sometimes a little's error ?

NOBODY is Perfect right? And qualities as a fan fic writer, fan, woman, friend, caring, and empathetic you have and they are huge And guess what...people who prefer to criticize SHES A REALLY TREASURE !

I could list about more than 100 things you did that were important! And if you wanna i can make a list...my nerd brain remembers all good gestures 🥰

And this is for all there fans no fans humans that read...

When they criticize you...choose the other path...which Anna Torv has also advised...

FEEL PROUD OF EVERYTHING YOU HAVE DONE!  😍❤️

Thank you so much for your kind words, Maria ❤️❤️❤️

Honestly, I am genuinely at a lost as to why some people get so mad and unforgiving over honest mistakes, especially when I mean it when I say I never meant any harm, and will listen and change my behavior if it's not appropriate. I have been in this fandom for a very long time, and I've always tried my best to be nice, and to do better when I can do better. And anyone who takes the time to actually get to know me at all, unlike those people who have honestly been very closed-off from the start, knows that I'm the opposite of an asshole, and that my life motto literally is 'let's be kind and show empathy'.

I swear twitter puts a negativity filter on everyone's brain, they expect the worst of everyone. The fact that they thought I'd sent people after them to 'harass' them, when I wasn't even aware of what was going on until my friend reached out to me to tell me about it, at which point said friend had already gotten involved, just baffles me. I'm a 36 year old adult with bad social anxiety, I live my life hoping to avoid drama or situations in which people will get angry at me in any way. The last thing I would ever think to do is have that kind of vindictive behavior, especially about something I knew I could have handled better. But you can't have conversations with the twitter crowd, you just can't. They will assume the worst of you and that's it.

I haven't been on twitter for a couple weeks now, except to post fic links for my followers who care about them, and honestly, I don't know if I'll be back, not when there are a few people who seem to enjoy scrutinizing the things I do or say.

I still want to do the Anna project because I want her to receive love from her fans, but my anxiety about this is too high at the moment, and my brain a bit too unkind.

I'm very thankful for fellow fans like you, Maria, I mean that 😘😘😘

[mythicalmyles]

honey i’m so sorry that’s happening. i was going through the same thing a while ago. it’s okay if none of those things work. just “taking a bath” doesn’t work with depression. some meds didn’t work for me either. it’s important to remember that meds don’t work for a lot of people. it’s okay to try new ones and switch them. i tried like three different ones and dosages before finding one that worked for me. it takes time to heal and im sure these people reminding you of your problems don’t make you feel any better. it’s okay to feel upset. i probably can’t make you feel different about yourself but i can say i’ve gone through that. so many people have and you are not alone. it’s very very hard to believe but it does get better. i’m sure you’ve heard that millions of times before, but it does.

as for the nicotine, it’s hard to get off that kind of stuff. habits are hard to break. i understand that. i was the same with sh. i don’t have much experience with that kind of addiction, but i can recommend nicotine gum and patches.

one thing that helped me when i felt like i was going to do something was remind myself how many people would miss me. how my dog would stand by the window wondering where i went because she didn’t understand. how my parents and friends would mourn me and miss me.

it’s okay to reach out for help and you’ve done so much already by getting a therapist. it’s okay to switch therapists. i had to go through about four before i found my right one.

you are doing amazing by letting these feelings out and it’s okay to feel this way. so many people care about you. i know it’s hard to believe but it will get better. it may take days, months, years, but it will. i know it’s frustrating and i know none of this might help but i want you to know there are people like you out there who are going through this.

additionally, you should add the suicide hotline to your phone, i did it and it’s a good emergency plan. one thing you can also try on tumblr is kokobot, it’s anonymous and it’s a whole bot about venting.

you’ve got this love. stay strong<33

Ive been on so many meds im not qualified to get weed legally in the uk i lost count of how many ive been thru and these ones do good.. but they dont always work and my drs just keep upping my dosage im on 350 quitiapine and 150 sertraline along with 100mgs of instant activate quitiapine and honestly if it werent for my bf and the animals i wouldve dipped a long time ago but ik no one will look after them as well as i do

Unfortunately im allergic to nicotine patches and i cant actually have chewing hum due to my tmj i tried the spray but it instantly made me throw yp everytime i tried it so i packed it in and it was our first day i felt shitty bc we went straight into my trauma (first person ive ever told what actually happened) so i was dealing w that after along w flashbacks shes rlly sweet though and was really kind to me it was just a heavy session

And funnily enough i have tried two hotlines and both hung up on me so that was gucci mane 💃 but thank you i really appreciate it and i hope you have a great day

[st5lker]

the corporatization of the lgbt community is why im gonna be honest im kind of tired of the focus on effeminate gay men in media (both real and fictional). and i know that saying that really sounds like a "gay people i respect vs gay people i dont" meme help but i really have nothing against feminine or "flamboyant" gay men at all or the ones that wear makeup and are fit the popular trope like i absolutely dont think we need to be like protect masculine gay men and i do recognize that many gay men like that exist in an authentic way. im just tired of the fact that every time there's an open gay man in media where his gayness is relevant it's a james charles clone.

i was thinking about this when a friend told me about web-weaver which is a newer spiderman and although its really not all that egregious and i dont have any particular problem with it i honestly would have liked it more if a gay spider-man had literally any other type of personality. and thats bc whether its a real person or not nobody will tell the story of a gay man Unless they're, like all popular drag queens right now, designed explicitly for white cishet girls to go Ooh Boots The House Down Fruity Pink Gun Girlypop to. and i dont hate it because i think that type of gay man is "overrepresented", i hate it because i know companies choose them because they're profitable.

honestly even though i say feminine as a shorthand it isnt even just showing feminine gay men, its showing this very specific trope of one. there are soo many ways that gay men express femininity and gender nonconformity that dont manifest as a fashion/makeup obsession and supermodel poses and snappy "reads" but these versions of them aren't as profitable, wont get as popular, wont get as many people writing articles about how queer and transgressive it is since it doesn't fit the popular corporate pride image of what a gay man looks like. like, in web-weaver, his love interest is a male version of silk that doesn't fit the trope at all but imo still expresses plenty of femininity and gender nonconformity just in a less explicit way. and like, cool! but why was the decision made to make this gay man a love interest that appears for like 3 panels so far. why couldn't that have been the personality of the protagonist. why couldn't you have made the love interest be the effeminate and flamboyant fashion designer. hell make him the deuteragonist and include him more than silk was, i dont care.

again its not that i think its "wrong" for them to have done it this way but it just leaves a bad taste in my mouth because like, even though yes gay men like this authentically do exist i still know the reason they chose to make the first gay spider-man this personality was because that was the most profitable if not only profitable option. if the protagonist had silk's personality then the comic wouldnt have been talked about as much, period. it's the same reason it took this long for there to be gay protagonists in the first place. sure there was homophobia from the executives involved, but even if the publishers were the most progressive people on earth, it didnt matter because it wouldnt be profitable. nobody in the general public wanted to read a story about a gay superhero. now, the only people that do only want to read about ones that remind them of drag race.

[petewentzisblack1312]

hi i wanted to ask something but also share something personal as well. my q is: do you feel like your relationship w social media has changed? meaning, do you catch / notice when you are on it for too long and you start to notice, and then you say: okay let's take a break. for me, i have been online for a long time ever since i was a kid, and now my relationship to it is i only limit myself an hour to being on my phone. as an adult now i am no longer social media "obsessed". like, when i am in school i am not thinking about online, i am present when im at school. i feel like i am really close to just deleting sm tbh. it does not grant me happiness like it used to. now as an adult i feel this need to live my life freely.

i also wanted to ask what are ur thoughts on content influencers? to me when i see these ppl i think...i could never post about everything about my life, but then again understanding that it is just a highlight reel. no one is posting every sad / frustrating thing that happens in their life as influencer, only the "great" parts.

this is an interesting question! i think ive never really had a relationship to social media where i feel like i need to post constantly or felt pressured to share everything. while im definitely the most online out of my household, compared to a lot of other people im not really very present online. i dont like using twitter, i only really use instagram to look at and post art and occasionally post a picture of my cat or nature or food on my main account, i dont really get up to much and i never use facebook unless i have to. i hate it. even here on tumblr i dont post a lot about my personal life unprompted, and this is the social media site i use the most by far. i do scroll tumblr a lot, i do watch a lot of youtube videos (though almost exclusively video essays on politics and recently also artist vlogs) and i do notice myself scrolling a bit too much, particularly when im overstimulated but instead of doing something less stimulating im anxious and looking for a distraction so i like. scroll harder. but ive never been like doing something else and thought 'man, i wish i was scrolling right now'. i dont really know. i do have trouble putting my phone down, like when i need to sleep, but i have trouble putting ANYTHING down. games, books, art or writing or projects im working on, music im listening to, i dont think tumblr is special, its just another activity for me to be distracted by.

all that being said, i did leave social media for a while. i had a really bad experience in a fandom on tumblr (not the pwams incident. that led me to step away from bandom and move to another fandom) and honestly it made me realise that the problem i had with social media wasnt that i was using it too much, but that i had a toxic relationship with the communities i was interacting with on there. the nature of my relationship to social media was unhealthy, not the fact that i had one that was a large part of my life. i think when i wasnt using any social media i actually wasnt in a great place either, because i was isolated from people id cared about, especially since i had just undergone a very traumatic incident, and because of that became very isolated from my in person friends as well, even before the pandemic pushed me away from even the acquaintances i had made. i was worried about coming back to tumblr, but i think ive grown and learned in such a way that i know how i like to comport myself in cyberspaces, and that its been good for me in a way. which is weird, but. i think id kind of have to go in depth about my life and how the pandemic affected me and the specific nature of coming of age in st lucia and stuff. which i dont want to do haha.

as for influencers. i hate the concept. i understand it, and i dont universally hate influencers as a whole, but like. theres this specific kind of content creator where the thing they are sharing is just their life and there isnt like a specific thing theyre logging, like an artist sharing their creative process and how they manage their life around that, or a chef sharing recipes, and its not like theyre doing it just to do it, they have the goal of growing a following, and theyre not advertising anything but themself, like JUST themself, as a person-brand, and i find that so deeply annoying and repulsive. and like thats strong wording its a dog eat dog world and the girlies of all genders need to secure the bag like i get it. i get it. but its revolting to me. like. the vlogbrothers werent trying to get famous they were using youtube to communicate with each other and as an open video diary and people found them to be interesting personalities to watch. right. do you get it. annoyingly i gotta put myself out there if i want people to find my art and pins and stuff so i have to fuckin. make videos. sell people on me. the idea of making vlogs makes me dry heave bc im not important i dont want to have to sell myself like im important i dont want to put my face on a camera and implicitly say with every quirky performed statement i make 'i matter, pay attention to me, i need to exist so look at me' but unfortunately i might have to. a video essay i could do. thats me saying something. but a vlog? with the goal of people finding my stuff? good god. it sounds like poison.