#how come people are so greedy on there

[prettyhighforawhiteguyblog]

Amazon Vine reviewers should unionize.

We are being thrown housewares for our work. We are not getting milk frothers for free. We are creators writing content. Writing advertisements for Amazon itself.

Our critical reviews are used to lie about Amazons integrity. Our positive reviews get shit sold. Even our semi critical reviews being sales because they create stars and give a new product traction.

And we have to really create those reviews on our own because we sell half our shit on the Facebook Black Marketplace and write reviews that are based on what we see in the pictures.

Amazon knows we sell them. They have some nefarious reason making us pay taxes on our "free" stuff that they probably making us pay taxes on it so they can write it off as a fucking business expense.

As if the money mattered to Bezos. A few hundred bucks in taxes on our little home business means so much to us. Far more than to Bezos or the IRS. And the IRS could fucking leave us alone if Bezos would just start paying his fucking taxes on his infinite wealth. What is he going to lose when he has a trillion Freedom Tokens? But he makes us pay exorbitant taxes on trinkets we deliver all over town like drug dealers just to get some fucking pocket money.

Fuck that noise. Our ad content brings in billions for Amazon.

Mostly because they help these predatory sellers foist the same 3 shitty makes in 40 alphabet soup companies using the exact same fucking photos colluding the shit out of America. They know we're faking it, you know we're faking it. Even half the customers suspect we're faking it. But enough believe it. And these fuckers get a few dozen reviews under the newest branding of the same fucking shit from China Bezos floods is with.

You know Amazon taxes them all for using it's site and I'm sure they have some policy that makes more money somehow by charging new companies higher taxes or some shit. And the Chinese just calculate that as a minor cost of business expense.

They are raping the shit out of us for dollars and giving us our own recycled plastic shit in return.

It's hilarious. I applaud it. Well played Xi. I bow to you sir.

Now here's two middle fingers and a spit in you eye for the Weigers.

I wish.

This little scenario would doubtlessly cost me my life. I'm sure Mr Xi would make my death s priority of the Chinese Intelligence Agencies.

And I'm sure all our Bluetooth shit is infected with Chinese viruses to spy and affect our computers. I'm a dead man. All my shit is networked and GPS.

And I'm also sure the manufacturers are slapping in their own malware with the spyware contract software on everything to make extra money on our processing per and data. And a whole fucking lot of profiteering by draining all our processing for supercomputer networks dedicated to fucking crypto Global Warming accelerator bullshit for more stupid Freedom Bucks to live in Capitalism. But the Jerry rigged network of devices and computers is kinda a genius way of making at least this particular super computers doing crypto is not making CC2 directly. I mean they are still profiting from it... But anyway if someone needed a supercomputer for something more noble like scientific research...

If original, this is a Nobel kind of idea and I want a cut. A volunteer network of people putting more reputable malware on their computers. People can volunteer their processing power for science. It would never run while you were active, but when you laptop or phone goes to sleep it uses your computers processing power and spare ram to support say Stanford research. It would fire up research. It would be a cool thing to do this for your alma mater and your favorite basketball team.

Back to business. Unionizing and getting paid.

Our creative reviews get people to buy this shit. We deserve a cut

We write the reviews that get the people to buy your shit. And make you a fuckton more of these fucking US Dollars chaining us to Capitalism. We can't even live without money like a peasant. We need Freedom Bucks. And you don't. And we believe that however much that money is worth to Bezos, we deserve our wages. We deserve a cut in this dirty work.

You sell shit. We all know this. You could demand some level of quality on Amazon like the old stores. They had several standard brands. But only the brands they trusted the quality of or if the people demanded Jordans or whatever Capitalist shit we liked at the time.

We help you shovel this nameless shit at people for gross amounts of profit. Give me my pay.

I create the ads that people read. And here's the crazy thing. They find out our assessments were all over as individuals, but they're still relatively trustworthy as a whole group.

Figuring out how shitty or not this shitty product is going to work is a fucking skill. We are pretty fucking good at it.

On the rare occasion that we do we get something that is truly good, we make sure the reader knows it because we want people to get good shit.

And really, we're pretty likely to just say 5 stars and make shit up out of our butt in the review because hey, it probably works as well as one can expect for 50 bucks.

Our reviews are ads they get customers. First to check out shit with reviews to see how shitty it is and whether or not to take a chance. They look at reviews first to see what other people thought after they bought it. They see Vines. They might ignore them it they might use them as an advisor and take a chance anyway on a good bet according to johhnyfiveisalive7. And it turns outjohhnyfiveisalive7 is pretty reliable in their little analysis and obvious personal experiences. And who doesn't like a story and silly pics. So they trust johhnyfiveisalive7's suggestions and buy more of the shit you shoveled at them to try. You get a community of respected experts. People buy the shit you let us keep for our work. Even if it is shitty, just because it got enough meh reviews they take a chance on it. (And get stuck with more cheap shit usually.)

Amazon doesn't sell inexpensive decent quantity shit. It sells cheap shitty shit that is occasionally not so expensive.

Anyways Bezos is making boku bank of our creative work and expert, respected analysis. We should unionize and demand our cut.

Bezos will threaten to cut your vine access. Oh noes.

Your house is already furnished with shitty Amazon shit. Selling this shit is a shit show for spending cash unless you get real dedicated. The new toys and gifts to give are nice. But really, what do you get for your creative work beyond telling a few jokes in public.

What will they do without decent writers all of a sudden?

We They might bring in scabs. But they won't be good at their job and since the products are always new they need a new source of trusted reviewers.

So they might try to phase out dissidents here and there or in waves at leadership remove them from the community and to prevent union action. Be strong. Union strong.

But anyway we should ask for wages in proportion to the money we are bringing in and to the work we are really doing. We should get hundreds of thousands. We have better odds asking for ad creation level wages.

Without us they couldn't push all this alphabet shit on Americans and bug all our shit for China and slow down all our shit for crypto.

They can't keep selling their shit because nobody trusts their shit because it's all the same shitty shit with me shitty names that don't make sense. They killed all the real brands. They just flooded the market with cheap shit that is all nameless and unknown. Who's going to buy the latest shitty model everybody copies of nobody will review it.

Who's going to take a chance on a weird new name with 0 reviews? You need traction. You need Vine now. There's no history on all these new models. We can't see last year's buyers or 5 years ago buyers. Usually we can't even see last month's reviews, they are so new.

Nobody is going to buy your flea market shit without us. Vine wants a cut.

================

By the by:

You know sneaker companies and Michael Jordan in particular need to face up to their destruction of Black neighborhoods with their shitty Capitalism shows. I say Jordon because he really launched the sneaker collector craze. With his flashy shoes and slick ads and likable personality plus court dominance.

Jordan really needsto face up and and pay up.

He has to face up to the fact he profited off some terrible shit as he sold his shitty shoes made by fucking prison slave labor. He fucked up Black community, destroyed lives and whole inner city neighborhoods. As people fight fight and died and desperately sold it bought it robbed it to wear or sell for it's inflated price based on our adoration and admiration of Jordan. People regularly resorted to prostitution and violence in order to have and/or steal. How many people died over a back alley hold up gone wrong. How many ended up in the Justice System, in hell.

Jordan needs to pay up. Reinvest in Black America. That could be his new thing while he still quietly profits off of shoe sales.

[lionblaze03-2]

sometimes I think about writing and singing music not because I’m an incredible singer but because no one has my fucking voice, especially in popular music, and its disheartening to be born a girl, told you’ll only get girl roles or try to voice match other girls, or ‘sing with the girls’ and then only be able to match male voices because you’re a fuckin tenor and not anything higher. I can’t think of any girl Broadway roles I can hit all the notes on. Most songs I love I have to pitch down for myself or use falsetto for singing along to. It bothers me a lot less now because I’m an adult who’s more secure in myself but as a teen in kids musical theatre it FUCKED with me, BAD style. And I know for a fact that even now when I hear people with a voice like mine singing I get excited and immediately invested in their work because they’re like ME, finally, for once. A brother in this world of being afab and having the voice of a recently pubescent boy forever. Maybe I should be that brother too.

[weallpartyatybcpatricksfuneral]

my full time job is encouraging people to read the jurassic park books

[bekkachaos]

Wishing everyone a beautiful, glorious, very happy day ☀️

Except people who bought tickets to more than one night of the eras tour

[fantasticalleigh]

my local dollar tree went up from everything being $1 to then $1.25 and i was like ok that's not terrible but i haven't been there in months and now it's called a Dollar PLUS and things are $3 and $5 too i'm furious

[masquenoire]

Not me wondering at work what Roman’s Chinese Zodiac happens to be. Lo and behold, it’s the Pig, specifically Metal Pig.

[crystalis]

im sorry for being annoying about pokemon larely

[cherry-pop-soda]

i need to not look at politics ever again it makes me feel like im just gonna fucking die no matter what i try to do

[maggieisalarrie]

.

[woodnrust]

I will not lie I cried three times watching Mr.Harrigan's Phone. That being said when I went to review it on letterboxd I did not expect such low ratings and a lot of people were saying it was bad cause it was anti-technology but that is not what I got from this movie At All so I'm wondering if maybe I'm not processing this movie right cause I'm too hung up on the death scenes or if everybody else is just bad at analyzing this movie.

[soryualeksi]

If I have to hear "Well, those Ukrainian refugees sure have big cars..." One. More. Fucking. Time.

[weareuniqueandimportant]

VAUSH BATTLE: THE FALL OF LEFTISM PART 1...

VAUSH AND HIS CREW OF LEFTIST ATTEND A LEFTIST MEETING UNTIL EVERYONE STARTS KILLING EACHOTHER THEY'RE THE SOLE SURVIVORS AND DECIDE THEY WILL DESTROY THE WORLD WITH THEIR REACTIONARY IDEOLOGY THEY CALL LEFTISM... IN THE NEXT MEETING THEY DESTROY EVERYTHING... TURNS OUT THEY HAVE FALLEN OUT OF LEFTISM AND STOPPED CARING FOR LEFTIST PURPOSE... BUT REALLY NEVER BELIEVED IN THEM AT ALL... THEY RAISE AN EMPIRE THAT MUST BE DESTROYED... DJMUEL AND HIS CREW HEAR ABOUT THIS AND DECIDE THAT IS TIME TO MOVE AND DESTROY THE WORLD WITH THEIR REACTIONARY IDEOLOGY INSTEAD... VAUSH AND DJMUEL HAVE ANOTHER CRAZY BATTLE AND IN THE END DJMUEL BECOMES THE KING OF LEFTISM LIKE IN VAUSH ISLAND... THEN VAUSH KILLS HIM... AND IS NOW AGAIN THE KING OF LEFTISM... THEN VAUSH IS KILLED AND HE REALIZES HE'S EVIL AND WRONG... BUT INSTEAD OF CHANGING HE ONCE AGAIN TELLS EVERYONE HIS DAUGHTER LOLITA IS GOING TO CARRY HIS EVIL IDEOLOGY... DJMUEL'S DAUGHTER RETURNS ASWELL LIKE IN VAUSH ISLAND AND THEY FIGHT AGAIN MEANWHILE DJMUEL RUNS AWAY AND IS KILLED... HE DESERVED THAT BECAUSE HE'S A BIGOT... AFTER THIS BATTLE THEY'RE BOTH DEAD AND KILLED AS THE 2 PEOPLE REPRESENTING THEIR EVIL IDEOLOGY REALIZE THEY WERE BRAINWASHED AND MANIPULATED AND REALLY LOVE EACHOTHER ASWELL AS THE WORLD... LOLITA AND DJMUEL'S DAUGHTER HUG AND HOLD HANDS AND LEAVE PLAY TOGETHER BECAUSE THEY WERE MADE TO FIGHT INSTEAD BY THEIR FATHERS... THE WORLD MIGHT BE BROKEN... BUT ATLEAST THOSE 2 MONSTER ARE NO LONGER THERE TO HARM THEM IN ANY WAY ANYMORE... A POWERFULL WOMAN BECOMES THE QUEEN OF LEFTISM AND WILL BRING THE GOOD IDEOLOGY RADQUEER FEMINIST COMMUNIST ANARCHIST WE ASWELL BELIEVE IN TO THE WORLD...

[indygotcha]

After long observation, this is all I can think with how much Disney fumbled Magnifico and what we really ended up getting

[suguann]

LOVE IT WHEN YOU CALL ME LOVER—JJK MEN.

✎. jjk men showing you how much they love you. | wc. 2k+

tags. fem!reader, window sex, possessive behavior, mirror sex, oral sex, public sex, pregnancy, fingering, praise kink, size kink

featuring. gojo, nanami, geto

masterlist

↬ GOJO

He doesn’t think you’ve looked more breath-taking than you do right then, humming softly to the music on the radio while painting your toenails, the last stretch of daylight kissing your exposed knees through the window. You’re so lost in your own little world that you don’t notice him watching you.

The important emails on his phone go unanswered, saved for another day when you’re not there to distract him. You stretch your smooth legs to inspect your work and glance across the living room to give him one of those soft smiles that sends warmth through his middle.

“What do you think?” you ask, little sunflower yellow toes flexing on the coffee table. 

“They’re pretty, baby.”

Another smile stretches across your face, that full lower lip caught between your teeth. “You think so?”

“Positive.” His phone lies forgotten on the cushion beside him, and he leans back to make room for you. “Come here.”

His eyes make a lazy trail up from your delicate ankle bone to the soft slope of your collarbone that peeks out from one of his t-shirts as you walk towards him, getting his fill until his fingers itch to touch and retrace the invisible path. 

Gojo can’t help it. He’s struck by the sight of you.

He wishes he could trap the shocked and delighted sound you make when he pulls you into his lap, keep it tucked away in the untainted nooks and crannies for him to return to later. A little melody on repeat for the days he feels undeserving of such sweet things, how he treads the fine line of corrupting that wide-eyed innocence you have of the world.

Still. Still, the truth is, he’s a little greedy, and he doesn’t really care how bad of a person that makes him.

Everyone looks up to him in some way. Nobody ever called him a saint. 

Gojo works out more of those soft sounds—pressing you against the chilly, tall windows in the living room, fist in your hair, and his mouth attached to the long column of your throat—that make his mouth go dry. Your back arches to ease the way he fucks up into you, tits brushing up against the glass, and he loves how the distant city lights below shimmer around you like a halo.

A high-pitched whimper, sharp breaths fogging over the window. “‘Toru people can see.”

He doesn’t think he’ll ever tire of how your soft and silky little cunt sucks him in—wrapped up all warm and wet around his cock—cursing under his breath when he tells you he doesn’t care. You’re his, anyway. 

“Let them see,” he grunts into your neck, teeth catching along your skin before licking at the vulnerable spot above your pulse. “Let them see how I fuck you because they can’t have you.”

Gojo can barely control himself at the mere idea that anyone would ever think they could. He’ll be the last and only one to know how you turn into a fucking vice when he hits particularly deep—how you shake like a leaf, legs coltish, after he makes you cum hard. 

↬ GETO

It feels like the epitome of terrible days: from the tomato stain on your skirt to your boss forcing deadlines down your throat and surprising Suguru at work only to find a pretty, willowy brunette sitting on the corner of his desk, her hand resting on a stack of graded papers, and fluttering her long lashes at him. 

The final nail in the coffin (a stupid nail, but a hammered-down nail nonetheless) is how she laughs and touches his arm, and Suguru doesn’t brush her off. He actually laughs back, all perfectly straight teeth on display and eyes crinkling at the corners. One of those heart-stopping smiles stretching across his face that you foolishly thought were all yours. 

Suddenly, you wonder if it was out of obligation that made him compliment you that morning in your dress—look at you, a kiss to your cheek, I’m going to fucking ruin you—a perfunctory greeting after being together so long (like making coffee or picking out paint), to make you feel better, or if he meant it—

A tap with sticky fingers to your cheek. “C’mon, watch.” 

You feel like you’re looking from the outside in, a spectator with a front-row seat that has your breath catching in your throat at the sight of his spit-slick chin and cheeks resting against the crease where thigh meets hip. He gives you a syrupy grin that tightens something in your stomach like a screw. 

“Not me,” he says, words laced with amusement. 

Hesitantly, your gaze trails up from his to the floor-length mirror perched in front of the bed, and what you see has your fingers sinking into the sheets. 

You can hardly pull your eyes away from how your leg looks draped across his broad, muscular back, making you look so small even though you sit above him. And it’s like Suguru knows what you’re seeing because his grin grows wider. 

“See, look how perfect you are. That woman in the mirror is so fucking pretty, I can’t believe I get to tell everyone she’s mine.” His thumb parts you open for his mouth. “Why would you think you look otherwise, huh?”

“I…don’t know,” you whisper, head a fuzzy mess of weak excuses that evaporate before they even have a chance to make it onto your tongue.

“Hm, that’s not a good enough answer.” 

Your hips twitch when he noses at your clit. 

“Awe, I bet that feels good, huh? I’m gonna show you what happens when you talk bad about my pretty baby,” then he sucks it into his mouth, making you squeal.

He can’t blame you for squeezing your eyes shut at the slick, hot pressure dragging through your folds—shaky fingers tightening in Suguru’s long, dark hair. It feels equally like everything and not nearly enough until he suddenly pulls away, taking that jittery feeling in your belly with him.

“Why’d you—”

“If you look away, I stop.” He chuckles lightly at the little pout you give him before his lips suck at the tender spot near the crease of your thigh, “so watch.”

↬ NANAMI

After lunch, he drags you across the street where there’s a park for him to set up a picnic blanket under a tree. Kento rests his head on your lap, slipping an arm around your waist and rubbing the sore spot in your lower back from being on your feet for too long. 

It’s all very innocent: him kissing your round pregnant belly, you running your fingers through his soft hair and talking about the latest work gossip. 

You hum when you feel his fingers crawl up your thigh, slowly at first and with no destination, just soft, aimless circles here and there, until the calloused pad of his thumb skirts over the front of your underwear, making you jerk with a small squeak.

“Kento,” you giggle, fingers tightening in his hair. 

He smiles at the scandalized look spreading across your face and leans forward to press another kiss against your stomach.

"Do you trust me?" he asks, hand pushing up your dress. 

You glance around the park to see if anyone is paying attention to the two of you—an elderly couple feeding the ducks frozen peas by the pond, a mother and father playing with their giggling daughter in the grass, college kids throwing a frisbee, all far enough away to be out of earshot (but that’s not the real problem here)—before you look back at your husband. 

“W-what?” you sputter, wide-eyed realization taking over.

He presses another open-mouthed kiss to your thigh. “Do you trust me?”

A soft whine slips past your teeth, the hand not in his hair curling into the blanket. “But everyone will notice because I’m—I’m—”

(A beached whale. An air balloon. A carnival-sized melon. You get the gist.)

“Gorgeous.” He smooths a hand over your bump, open-fondness radiating across his features, the subtle hint of possessiveness there making you shiver. “You look so fucking gorgeous with my baby growing inside you. Let me take care of you.”

“B-but—”

Everything else melts away to the pulsing heat between your legs and your husband groaning from the wetness he finds there. Your shaky thighs fall open wider when his fingers hook under the edge of your underwear (unflattering things worn for comfort over sexual appeal), pulling them aside to run his fingers through your slick seam. 

Pregnancy brain clouds your judgment, and before you can think twice about your actions, how you definitely shouldn’t let Kento eat you out in the middle of a public park, you nod your head. 

His lips ghost over the tender flesh of your upper thigh. "I need to hear you say it."

It’s a low and shaky yes that has his fingers finally sinking into you to the third knuckle, steadily pumping in and out of you. You buck down onto his hand, trying to bite back the moan threatening to alert everyone in the park of the head under your skirt.

“You’re going to cum for me, just like this,” Kento tells you, voice muffled by a layer of powder blue cotton. “Alright, darling?” 

[mrfoox]

Once I don't feel lonely it's over for ya'll

[hellisharchive]

・﹒・ hypersexual nights

Summary: How various Hazbin and Helluva Boss characters react to a hypersexual reader!

Warnings: 18+, sexual scenarios, Vouyer!Vox, does hypersexual not tell you enough lol just read it

Parings: [Seperate] Saint Peter, Lucifer, Valentino, Adam, Vox, Mammon, and Striker x hypersexual!reader

Notes: HOLY SHIT THIS WAS GONNA BE FOR 300 FOLLOWERS NOW ITS 400 FOLLOWERS! As a celebration, have this! I'm an hypersexual aroace myself so hypersexuals rise up! 💪

﹒Adam﹒

・He would notice how you always were down to fuck, almost every day in fact, how could he not? You've been the only one to truly keep up with him as most other people always had "low" sex drives and wouldn't be in the mood when he was. So you were like a blessing just for him when day after day, you would always be up for sex at any given moment. When you told him you were Hypersexual one day after a good fuck, he just laughed in your face.

・"Hypersexual? You're always horny? Bitch PLEASE I already knew that. You ask for sex like- every day and never shut up about it. That's why I like you so much. You want to be fucked just as much as I want to fuck"

﹒Saint Peter﹒

・He is a pretty innocent soul, he swears occasionally but when it comes to sex? Oh boy. And you? Being hypersexual? You always flirt with him in a suggestive manner, wanting him to just admit that he likes you. He can't help but simultaneously love the attention as the thoughts you always put in his head, but feel so embarrassed and dirty about it. He always seems to short circuit whenever you flirt with him, but he never says no, so you keep doing it. He of course noticed it after the first few times, you being on par with Adam in sexuality, how could he not? But when you admitted that you were hypersexual and he finally understood.

・"Oh? That's why you uh- why you're always flirt with me! Haha...and say those...really uhm...dirty things... Not that I mind of course! I actually uh...kind of like it..."

﹒Lucifer﹒

・He had his suspicions very early on, it was so obvious to notice how you and Angel Dust got along so well with the topic of sex. He also noticed how you always made sex jokes and talked about sex even without the porn star around. And when it came to him? You always seemed to get flustered whenever he flirted with you, always ensuring to make it dirty, and it worked everytime. After you got together, you almost pounced on him, wanting to have sex early on. He didn't mind it, but in fact, wanted it. You then apologized and said you were hypersexual, meaning you couldn't not think about sex constantly. He just laughed and pinned you down on the bed.

・"Oh I know very well, very well. And I will enjoy fulfilling every. Single. Desire. You could ever ask for"

﹒Mammon﹒

・He isn't exactly the smartest tool in the shed, but he knew you were just as greedy as him. Not in the money sense, no, no. But in sex. You haven't yet gotten to that point in your relationship yet, but he could tell you were denying taking the step. Was it because he was a Sin? He didn't know. All he knew is that if you didn't fuck him already, he was going to fuck you first. So he confronted you and you said you were scared of him just using you for sex due to your constant sexual nature. He reassured you that he truly did love you, but couldn't deny that someone just as greedy as him was very nice to have around.

・"Oi! Don't be scared mate! I won't use ya just for sex and toss ya away! I love ya too much for that. But ya know- I'd be down to fuck every single night if that's what you want"

﹒Vox﹒

・He is an interesting case. He isn't the best guy around and loves to spy on you. So, when you act all innocent and sweet around him, yet fuck yourself silly with a stupid toy screaming for him so incredibly often it becomes a pattern? Yeah, you're hiding your sexual nature. Which is odd, but probably so Valentino didn't swoop in to take advantage of you. Instead of talking to you, he let your feelings build and build and let your toy eventually not be enough for you. You finally burst into his office and told him you knew he was watching you while you masturbated. He was taken aback at first, but then laughed as he realized you loved that he watched you.

・"You need the real thing, huh? Was waiting for you to finally say it you dirty little whore"

﹒Valentino﹒

・He noticed immediately as you would constantly flirt with him in a suggestive way and he would flirt back just as hard if not harder. It was so easy to notice, he played into it very hard and took advantage of your very sexual nature. It was easy to get you hooked quickly and you never had to say a thing. He fucked you in every way he could imagine and you loved every second of it. It was a mutual understanding between you two- the thought of telling him that you're hypersexual was laughable in every sense of the idea.

・"Oh baby~ you wanna be fucked into the mattress again? It hasn't even been three hours amore~ you're still horny? I'll make sure you can't walk anymore after~"

﹒Striker﹒

He isn't apposed to sex, he just hates it when people makes jokes about it when he's just trying to do his job. In fact, he loves sex, have you seen the huge statue where his dick is very endowed? That man is full of himself and knows he can fuck good. You started out as a target for him and at first your sexual flirting threw him off his game. But after many failed attempts of cat and mouse, you finally managed to get him to admit that he liked it from your non stop remarks.

・"Ok fine- yer hot and I wanna fuck. Don't look at me like that! Not my fuckin' fault yer always telling me you wanna suck my cock"