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#i actually finished that paper in TWO HOURS this morning
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Heaven's in your eyes (Part 2)
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Pairing: Billy Hargrove x Female Reader
Summary: Life in Hawkins is dull and lonely, especially after your mom abandoned your family, leaving you even more isolated amidst school rumors. Already shy and with few friends, you find solace in your solitude—until Billy Hargrove, the intriguing new boy from California, comes into the picture. To your surprise, Billy seems to seek you out, finding ways to talk to you despite the odds. Never in a million years would you have imagined forming such an unexpected bond with someone.
Link to: Part 1
@tatumrileyslover @nocturnest @i-keepmyideals @eddiestans-blog here you go!
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It has been exactly six days since Billy dropped you home that Monday after the trip. The following days he never fails to greet you if you cross paths in the hallways. He hasn't ignored you once, even though you haven't called him yet. The truth is, you are terrified of doing so. When you think about dialing his number, two days later, you think it's too soon and you will look desperate, so you put the phone receiver back in its place. At the same time, you keep mulling over his words. 'Call me when you feel like it'. It means you don't have to call him right away, maybe he really means to call him when you feel like it. On Saturday morning, you decide it's the perfect time to call him. Enough time has passed to avoid seeming desperate, but not so much that it seems like you don't want anything to do with him. You need to repay the favor, and even though it's pouring rain outside, you pick up the phone.
After a couple of hours of pondering and racking your brain, you decide to take the risk and go for it. You had written Billy's number down as soon as you got inside, safely on a piece of paper. As the phone rings, you're already regretting your decision, feeling nervous as hell.
“Hello,” a girl's voice answers.
“Oh, um, hello. Is Billy there?”
You definitely didn’t expect a girl to answer. She sounds very young.
“Hold on,” she says, sounding bored. You quickly move the phone away from your ear as she screams Billy’s name.
A few seconds later you hear the rustle of the phone being moved around. “...cking yelling like a banshee. Hello?”
“Hey, it’s Y/N” you say, hoping he remembers your name. It would be weird if that’s the case.
“Hey. What’s up?” he says instead.
You instantly feel relieved. 
“You told me to call you when I wanted. I hope it’s not a bad time.”
“‘Course not,” he says. “You okay?”
“I’m good, thank you. And you?”
“Yeah, same. What you’re doing today?”
“Um, nothing special.” You glance at the window. “The weather is awful. I was actually wondering if you wanted to go grab a bite?” It feels like you’re inviting him on a date. It’s embarrassing. “Since it’s raining.” Now you’re repeating yourself. You’re glad he can’t see you blushing furiously as you keep rambling. “I mean, remember you told me you wanted to see more of Hawkins? I saw the weather and thought about this place. It’s a bit outside of town. If you don’t have anything planned.”
“Yeah, sure. Just need to finish working on some stuff. I can pick you up at seven.”
“Seven is perfect,” you say, your heart still hammering in your chest. “I’ll see you then.”
“See you.”
You change clothes at least three times, unable to decide what to wear. You don't even know why you're making such a big deal out of it—it's not a date, just an outing between friends. Actually, you two aren't even that close. But don't dwell on that too much; what is the reason for your outing, anyway? Originally, it was to show Billy the rest of Hawkins. Dinner is part of that plan, but Benny's Burger isn't one of the places he mentioned, even though it's a bit more isolated. However, that didn't seem to bother him. This time, you decide to bring enough money to pay for both of you. It's the least you can do.
Despite anticipating this moment with secret enthusiasm, seven o'clock arrives faster than you'd like. You leave the house in the pouring rain to find Billy's Camaro idling in front of your trailer, its low rumble cutting through the night. You hurry to open the door and close your umbrella, trying not to let any water into the car. As you settle into the seat and turn to greet him, your breath catches. You try not to look too impressed by the sight of him as you fix your wet hair, but a quick glance is enough to get your heart racing. You’re increasingly convinced that this man has no physical flaws, and that thought destabilizes you. He’s wearing a white tank top under a black leather jacket, with blue jeans that fit like they were tailor-made for him. As he puts his hand on your seat and looks over his shoulder to back up, he manages to keep his cigarette firmly between his fingers, one hand on the steering wheel. You take the opportunity to steal a glance at him. The movement brings him closer, and the scent of his cologne reaches your nostrils, making you feel strange. His long curls are perfectly styled, reminding you of a lion.
“I didn’t think you’d actually call.” he says as he shifts from reverse to first, heading toward the end of the trailer park. 
“Oh,” you say. “Why is that?”
“Dunno.” he chuckles, his long lashes brushing his cheekbones. “Maybe you were scared of me or something.”
His sentence moves something inside you. "Oh. Not at all,” you say, your voice carrying a hint of determination. You are determined to make him understand that you may be shy, but you are not a fragile little thing. "I'm not scared of you."
“You’re not?” his voice is like a low rumble, it burns through you and sets you on fire.
“Uh-huh.” your mouth feels dry, and you distract yourself by feeling the hot air coming out of the vent with your hands.
“Good.” 
When you walk into Benny's Burger, it's practically deserted. There's just a couple of old gentlemen. From the way they are dressed, they look like fishermen. It looks like they have recently ordered because there is only cutlery and two glasses of beer on their table. Benny Hammond comes to take your order and greets you warmly. He and your dad are good friends, they went to school together here in Hawkins. Billy orders a double burger and a large portion of fries, and you order a steak with a small portion of fries. You were afraid the evening would be punctuated by few words and awkward silences. Billy is not the biggest of talkers, but the feeling of uneasiness quickly vanishes as the night goes on. You tell him about your dad and Benny, recounting how your dad was born and raised in Hawkins. When you tell him about his travels, you linger and talk a lot about California. Billy is curious about what your dad did there for five years. Then you tell him how he went to Jamaica alone and risked his life several times but had a good time. Then Billy tells you how his group of friends in California had been very diverse, two of them being a Jamaican and a Filipino. He tells you how good their mothers' cooking was when he was invited to eat at their house. You are surprised how the conversation always manages to bounce back. 
Half an hour later, Billy has cleared his plate. You, on the other hand, are still struggling to finish your steak, so he finishes it for you. You comment in amazement that he eats like a horse, then immediately apologize, feeling your face flush with embarrassment. Billy laughs and tells you he does weight training five times a week. You feel like saying you've noticed, but luckily manage to stop yourself in time and avoid further embarrassment.
You insist on paying to make up from last time, but Billy refuses categorically. You feel guilty, but his stubbornness prevents you from doing anything else. When you leave the restaurant, it has stopped raining. The smell of rain rises from the asphalt of the car park. As you walk towards the parked Camaro, you cross your arms over your chest, suppressing a shiver. Out of the corner of your eye, you see Billy take off his jacket.
"No, don't take it off, I'm good, really." you tell him, already knowing what he’s doing.
“Here,” Billy drapes it over your shoulder anyway. The weight of a jacket and the smell of leather envelop you. You try not to show your surprise as his warm hand gently squeezes the back of your neck. “Just wrap it around yourself. Don’t wanna catch a cold.” 
His hand seems to leave an imprint on your skin. You didn’t know you would like his touch so much until now. The sound of zippo rips through the silence and your mind. Billy walks past you, the orange glow of a freshly lit cigarette is the only light in the evening darkness. He opens the driver’s door and bents inside, inserting the keys and fiddling with the radio. You lean your back against the side of the car, enveloped in the warmth of his jacket, still carrying the lingering heat from his body. You breathe through the collar of it, smelling the faint scent of his cologne. 
The gentle guitar strumming of ‘Landslide’ wafts through the air as Billy closes the door, windows down, and leans against the car, beside you. You turn towards him, your eyes dragging over his body covered only by his wifebeater. He takes a drag from his cigarette, the tip of it vibrating until it almost turns red. 
"You’re sure you're not cold?" you ask, daring to be a bit bolder and nudging his shoulder gently.
Billy nudges you back, mumbling around his cigarette. “Hey, I’m a tough guy.”
You softly shake your head at his answer, looking at the trees in front of you, forming a wall of darkness, a trickle of wind shakes them slightly in the breeze. “I love this song,” you say with a soft smile. Then you look at him. “I didn’t know you liked Fleetwood Mac”.
“What did you think I liked?” Billy asks after exhaling the smoke, taking the cigarette from his mouth.
“I don’t know,” you hesitate, hoping he doesn't misinterpret your words. “I thought you were more into metal. Just ‘cause I heard you playing it from your car sometimes.” you hastily add.
Billy hums in acknowledgment. “So you were watching me, huh?”
“No, it’s not that! You just, sometimes the music is very loud.” 
He laughs, and it’s such a pleasant sound. It makes your insides swirl. “S’alright. I do play my music very loud.” he flicks the cigarette on the ground, the glowing ashes extinguishing silently on the wet asphalt. “I listen to metal, yeah, but I like rock in general. Hard rock, folk rock,” he jerks his head to his right where the music comes from. 
You hum thoughtfully, tightening his jacket around you. “That’s nice. I think they’re among my favorite folk rock bands.
“Those guys?”
“Yes.” 
Billy nods his head. “They’re cool, yeah. What else do you like?”
You hum while thinking. “There’s lots. My dad likes all these rock bands, like Led Zeppelin, Pink Floyd, and a bunch of others. I picked it up from him. He used to blast them in the house when I was little," you recall with a soft smile. "He's a big fan."
“Well, well, well.” Billy grins in appreciation, his smoldering eyes on you. “Didn’t know little miss was so cool.” 
You let out a small laugh, and put a strand of hair behind your ear with a shake of your head to do something with your hands. You thank the night for hiding how flustered you are. “I just…” 
“What else are you hiding?” he tilts his head toward you, the warming mood bringing him closer than before, his shoulder brushing against yours.
“Not much.” you laugh again, unable to meet his eyes. 
“Huh-huh,” he mumbles playfully, bringing the cigarette to his mouth. 
You switch the conversation on him, to shift the attention from you. “And how did you start listening to rock?” 
Billy initially stays quiet. At a certain point, you’re almost convinced he either didn’t hear you or doesn’t want to answer.
“My mom.” he finally says. You look at him, instantly feeling the shift in his mood. “She listened to all this folk stuff, like Joni Mitchell, Mamas and Papas, Bob Dylan. I remember hearing it play in the house since I was a toddler.” he muses, and for a moment seems lost in the memory, breathes a silent laugh through his nose. “She was a bit of a hippie.”  
You can imagine his mom dancing barefoot in the living room, him mirroring her movement with a smiling chubby face, his bright blue eyes looking up in adoration at her.  
“And my old man didn’t like that part of her one bit,” he says then, his voice turning acidic. He flicks his cigarette again. “You meet someone and expect them to change what they are for you. Kinda makes sense, huh?” 
Something in the way he talks about her suggests to you that her mother is part of his past. You don't know on what level, but surely the whole thing didn't end well. And that's one of the sensitive topics regarding his life in California. 
‘Dreams’ starts playing next, filling the last few seconds of silence. It makes you think about the vinyl of that album you bought in Chicago when you spent part of last summer at your grandparents’. It was the right before your mom left.
"I think it’s kind of cool. It's usually always dads who listen to that music,” you say gently in an attempt to lighten the mood. 
“Yeah, no.” Billy snorts. “Surely not mine. He thinks that’s the Devil’s music. Still into that conservative bullshit.”
“My grandma thinks the same,” you comment. “I had ‘Rumours’ on vinyl before.” you start, referring to the current song’s album. I bought it that summer when I visited them in Chicago. It got damaged shortly after buying it. I still think she broke it on purpose.
“Shit. That sucks.” 
“Yeah,” you sigh. “It’s my favorite one.”
“Do you still have your record player?”
“Yes. I have a few other vinyls too.”
As the two of you continue to talk about music, a topic you didn't think you'd be on the same tune on, the mood returns to a lighter one. Soon later, the rain starts falling again stopping you in the middle of your conversation and you both realize it got late. Billy crushes his unfinished cigarette with his boot and you get in the car.
“Thanks for paying tonight. Again,” you tell him sheepishly once on the drive back home. 
Billy slightly lowers the radio's volume until the guitar strums are just background noise, his eyes fixed on the road. “There’s lots of other ways to make it up to me, but I won’t let you pay. Sorry, sweetheart." 
His tone suggests he's not sorry at all. It almost sounds like it’s out of the question for him. You try to ignore how the nickname makes your heart flutter, refusing to dwell on its meaning.
“But why?” 
“Because,” he chuckles, probably amused by how you seem fixated on the question. “It’s just the way it works.”
“Doesn’t make sense,” you mumble quietly, burying half of your face in his big jacket still wrapped around you and suppressing a shiver. 
“Shit. Does it always rain in this shithole?” he squints his eyes a little bit as he lifts the lever to increase the windshield wiper's speed. The rain is now pelting the car more aggressively. 
“I think it’s because you’re used to California,” you say gently. 
There still are a few droplets of water on his naked arms and shoulders. However, he doesn’t seem to feel cold since he’s not shivering.
“Guess so,” he mutters. 
For the first time, you notice he has a tattoo on his shoulder. It’s a skull smoking a cigarette. You wonder when he got it done, what does it represent? 
Before you can stop, your mouth talks. Your voice is quiet, but it is still audible. “That’s a cool tattoo.”
He turns his head toward you, and for a moment he seems surprised. Then his face settles back into a composed expression, his eyes flickering with a hint of amusement. "Yeah, you like it?" he responds casually, you swear his tone betrays a touch of warmth.
“Mh-mh.” you nod, feeling comfortable enough to say what you really think next. “It suits who you are.”
He lets out a quiet chuckle under his breath. “What do you think that is?"
Maybe it’s the relentless thundering of the rain over you, maybe it’s the fact that it’s pitch dark or you’re slowly being accustomed to being around him. You feel a sense of comfort enveloping you. 
“I think… You’re tough on the outside, you always act distant from what surrounds you, like you don’t care about anything and anyone. But deep down, you’re kind-hearted and really gentle.” 
The only sound breaking the silence is the soft hum of the music and the harsh drumming of rain against the car. Your swallow seems thunderously loud in the quiet, but the collar of his jacket offers some solace. Glancing at him, you breathe in the scent of leather and him, focusing on his forearms—robust yet slender—then his hands gripping the steering wheel, long fingers lightly wrapped around it. You wonder what it would feel like to have his arms around you, his hands on your waist, neck, cheeks. Every thump of your heart against your ribcage feels hyper-aware.
“Like, incredibly kind and gentle,” you venture, sensing the weight of your words. It's why you try to cloak yourself in the armor of a rough exterior, a fortress formed by sharp cutting gazes, sharky smiles and skinned knuckles. You want to say more, but it feels too personal, too revealing. You know he wouldn't handle it well. It would make him feel vulnerable, prompting him to close off. You guess he’s hiding some things from himself and the world, afraid it would spill over and flood the fragile sanctuary of his soul. 
Billy chuckles softly, his tone light yet evasive. "You're painting me as a real softie, aren't you?" his words carry a playful edge, his gaze still fixed on the road ahead. His eyes won’t meet yours, though. There are a few seconds of silence before he speaks again. "Got it last year. The tattoo. Hurt like a bitch."
You notice his subtle attempt to divert the conversation. But you can’t blame him. You went a bit too hard. 
“I want to get one too. Someday,” you murmur. 
“Yeah?” he glances at you.”D’you have something in mind?” 
“Not really…I guess I’d have to think about it.”
“You should. It’s gonna be there forever. Unless you get it lasered off, which is a new thing. And that’s a whole other level of pain.”
Just to make you think about it makes you shiver. “Laser it…?”
“Yeah.”
Getting a tattoo is something you have to ponder for a long time indeed. And you’ve always had a penchant for changing your mind. Getting excited about ideas, projects, and it always seemed to work for a long time until you changed your mind. Or something happened and you consequently changed your vision of things. You’ve always been uncertain. Your life had a penchant for unexpected events and uncertainties as well.
“Maybe getting a tattoo is not for me,” you mumble. “I’m bad at making decisions. I feel like all of my life is going to be like this.”
“What do you mean?”
As the car slows down, you realize you’re already driving on Forrest Hill trail road.  
“I mean…” "I mean…” you sigh, uncertain whether to delve into what’s on your mind and risk exposing yourself. But Billy opened up tonight, so you feel compelled to do the same. It also feels kind of natural. “In my life, things always seem to take unexpected turns. Often in a bad way. I can never know what to expect. And I don’t like that.”
The car comes to a halt, and you find yourselves parked in front of your trailer.
“Well, I could tell you ‘That’s the beauty of it’ or some stupid shit like that. But huh…” he chuckles, shaking his head as he rattles the pack of cigarettes in his palm to extract one. “My life has been a shit show itself. So, I get it.”
“I’m really sorry,” you say softly. That’s all you can say, you can only imagine from the vague piece of information he gave you. 
Billy shrugs as if to brush it off. It’s so natural it looks rehearsed. You wish you could tell him it does matter, that he deserved to have a happy childhood, he deserves a happy life.
“I wish I could at least have a hint. Even if it’s just one piece of information. I don’t like all of this uncertainty,” you continue. You've known Billy long enough to understand he doesn’t appreciate pity, or even anything that remotely seems like pity. “I wish I could see my future. My grandma…” you stop yourself with an embarrassed laugh. “I know this is gonna sound stupid. It’s probably not true anyways. But I’ve always wanted to get my palm read. My grandma used to know how to do it.”
Met with silence, you feel the familiar burn of shame and regret welling up inside you. Why would you say that? He’s probably thinking you’re crazy for believing in this stuff.
“Wanna give it a shot?” 
You turn toward him in surprise. “You know how?”
“Yeah, I’m pretty good at it.” he shrugs, putting the pack of cigarettes in the compartment. Then places his cigarette behind his ear. “Come on.” he holds his palm in invitation. You place your hand in his, palm facing up. 
“Alright,” he begins, tracing a line with his fingertip, “This here, is your headline. It’s curved and wavy, which means you’re creative and intuitive. You think outside the box, not afraid to follow your own path.”
You watch his face, his concentration as he reads your lines. “And this one. Huh. Oh yeah. See, your lifeline is strong and deep,” he continues, his voice a low rumble. “That means you’re full of energy, and vitality. You’ve got resilience, no matter what life throws at you.”
He shifts his focus to another line, “An this, here, this is your fate line. Not everyone has one. Suggests you’ve got a purpose, something you’re meant to do, and it’ll shape your life significantly. Basically, your destiny is in your hands.”
His thumb moves lightly over your palm, his touch sending a shiver down your spine. “Your skin is soft. How's it so soft all the time?” he almost mutters to himself. “Means you’re sensitive, maybe a bit sheltered. Shows you’re not letting anyone in. But it’s not a bad thing, you know what I mean?”
You could listen to his voice forever. It’s like a low melody, resonating deep within you.
“How do you know all this?” you breathe, your eyes studying his face. 
“Told you my mom was a hippie. She was into all of this stuff. Taught me how to do it. Shit”, he chuckles. “...haven’t done that since I was ten probably.”
Finally, he traces the heart line, deep and prominent. “And this,” he says, rubbing his finger across a line that nearly runs the full width of your palm. “is your heart line. It runs deep, straight across. It means you feel things intensely. You love deeply, but you also hurt deeply. See this?” he presses his thumb into the little fleshy space between the first and middle fingers, then meets your eyes. “When it curves outward like this, it means you’re willing to give a lot to the other person. Like, you give all of you.”
You are caught between the urge to look away from him and hold his gaze. His tourmaline eyes are two deep pools in which you swear you can lose yourself.
“I uh, we’ll see about that.” you manage to say. “I haven’t had anything like that before.”
“Haven’t had a boyfriend yet?”
A small laugh escapes your lips at your own embarrassment. His own slightly twitch too. “God, no. I haven't exactly been in the game.”
“So nada, huh?”
One of his thumbs caresses your palm, the other the skin of the inside of your wrist, drawing circles. It sends tingling along your body. A pleasant shiver that makes your whole body aware, a hot sensation in the pit of your stomach, all your nerves rising. You can feel something hanging in the air, a palpable tension, but you also wonder if it's just your imagination running wild. Being inexperienced as you are, perhaps it’s all in your head, and all of this is fueled by the undeniable attraction you feel toward him. Then Billy jerks his chin toward your right.
“Looks like your dad is waiting for you.” 
You follow the direction he’s pointing at. Indeed, the little light outside the trailer is lit. Your dad is peering at the small window on the door, you can see him munching a pickle in the meantime. As you’ve been burned, you quickly retract your hand from his.
You are grateful to your dad for entering the picture and getting you out of this situation. With him looking at both of you, you can do little other than simply greet Billy without a second thought. Had he not been there, you would surely have stumbled over your words.
“Oh, uhm. Sorry about that.” you chew at your bottom lip before looking back at Billy, an apologetic expression on your face. It’s embarrassing. “He was probably worried, he does that when I come back late. Oh,” you suddenly remember you’re still wearing his jacket, so you quickly take it off. “Here. Thank you. I’ll see you at school?”
Billy takes the jacket. “Yeah. See you there. Sleep tight.” 
You want to ask him if another hangout is on the program, but you don’t wanna press too much, so you hurry inside the trailer with your heart a little lighter and a thousand questions. In your bed, you keep replaying the hours spent with him unable to fall asleep. His change of tone and attitude when he talks about his parents lingers in the back of your mind. You don't know his story in depth, but you are increasingly convinced that he and you share more than you think.
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yawnderu · 7 months
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K-9 — Simon ''Ghost'' Riley x Reader | Chapter I
Sick as a dog, and just as vicious.
1 2 3 4 5
Simon Riley and his pathetic efforts to get close to the new medic will earn him a scar or two
or
Simon Riley is crushing on an uninterested, tired medic.
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''I don't mean to be rude, but I'm getting tired of seeing you here.'' Your blunt words are met with a quiet chuckle, the masked man looking up at you with pure amusement in his eyes.
'' 'M trying not to get injured, bird.'' Oh, but he isn't. He's actively getting injured just so he can drop by and get your help. It's stupid, really, how his obsession with you began. He thinks about the first time he saw you, standing right next to Price, an unamused expression as he went on and on about his team, telling you stories of their missions and time together and despite how bored you looked, your attention was solely on him.
He took that chance to look at you, to truly admire you, noticing the way you pull up your glasses every few minutes even when they're not sliding down your nose, the way your eyes were focused only on Price, paying attention to no one but him, legs crossed while sitting next to Price, your face resting on your hand.
''Clearly not trying hard enough.'' He can't help the way his cock twitches at your bored tone, the small frown on your lips just making him think how pretty you'd look with his cum all over your face— he shakes his head softly, trying to get his mind out of the gutter, focusing on the fast and professional work you're doing on his injured arm, pulling the skin back together with a beautifully done stitchwork.
''It's hard being out there.'' He tries to make conversation and all you can do is hum in acknowledgement, gaze focused on the way the needle digs into his skin, coming out of the other side just to be pulled back together with the thin, transparent thread.
''Y'know Gaz was hanging from a chopper by a bloody rope?'' He knows you're close to Gaz, he has seen you talk to him often, and so he tries to desperately make conversation again.
''Scared the shit out o' the old man.'' His efforts work as a small snicker escapes your lips, stopping working on his stitches as you collected yourself. You look up at him with an amused glint in your eyes, nodding your head. God, he has never seen something quite as beautiful.
''Cap told me about it. Poor guy had his whole waist bruised.'' You let out another small laugh before turning your attention back to the deep cut in his arm.
''If I didn't know any better, I'd think you're getting injured on purpose.'' His heart almost stops as your cold eyes look back up at his, an eyebrow raised, yet there's a smirk tugging at the corners of your lips as you notice his lack of response.
'' 'M not.'' Is all he can say, the knowing look you give him enough to make his blood boil, traveling all the way down to his throbbing cock, thankful for the black hoodie sprawled across his lap to prevent the blood from leaking into his jeans. You ignore all the... beige flags, knowing he's not stupid enough to actually get injured on purpose. You finish stitching him up, throwing away the tools used and the bloodied gloves.
''Keep the wound dry for 24 hours, if any of the stitches come off or the wound opens, come to me.'' You softly pat his shoulders, a small yawn escaping your lips as you look up at the clock on the wall; 0200.
''Tired?'' He asks sarcastically, earning him a way-too-hard pat on the shoulder. Simon woke you up at 2 in the morning, claiming his wound couldn't wait. It wasn't even as bad as he made it seem, though you appreciate your work with the TF141 more than you let on, so you decided to help him. It isn't the first time he wakes you up at outrageous hours, claiming to need help for things ranging from a pathetic paper cut to a gunshot wound. This time, his arm was the only thing affected, a cut big enough to need stitches.
''Very. Now get out.'' Your hand sneaks into the back of his uniform, tugging softly and he gets the message, standing up and allowing you to guide him out of your office like he's a child. He doesn't care if it's you.
''Goodnight, Simon.'' You can barely keep your eyes open and he feels a slight sense of guilt at keeping you up, knowing you'll have to be awake again in less than 3 hours.
''Night, Doc.''
[NEXT]
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after-witch · 14 days
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Bookworm [Yandere Mahito x Reader]
Title: Bookworm [Yandere Mahito x Reader]
Synopsis: Mahito doesn't like that you have an interest in a book character.
Word count: 1787
notes: yandere, kidnapped reader, mentions of other people being tortured/killed, supreme self indulgence of the highest order
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“Who is the smiling man?” 
The silence that had existed between the two of you was broken by a question that made you flinch. Well, why not? Mahito has been quiet all morning--and afternoon, actually, which perhaps should have startled you more than his sudden words. 
But you were too happy to enjoy some quiet (you would never say “peace and quiet,” not down here, not with him); all too happy to curl up in your haphazard nest on the floor with some books that took  you away from this place. Away from Mahito.
Who was, of course, still here. Lounging in his hammock with a pile of books sagging down the netting. 
You couldn’t tell exactly what he was reading from down here--you probably needed new glasses, a subject you were certainly not going to bring up with Mahito, who might reiterate his offer to “fix” your eyes. It looked like a bundle of pages stapled together. Maybe he went to the library and printed off obscure articles to read again. 
“Hey,” he calls down, and the first hint of worry begins to prickle on your arms at his uncharacteristically serious tone, “Answer me.”
Your mind stutters, tries to put one word in front of the other, and make sense of it all. 
The smiling man? The smiling man, the… ah. From Small Spaces. The otherworldly supernatural entity who lives in a world behind mist and has a penchant for making deals with people for their greatest wishes. 
It’s not your fault that you haven’t thought about him in ages. It’s not like you had copies of your books with you, and the fun you had with imagining him in an endless number of scenarios had fallen by the wayside considering your circumstances. 
It’s hard to daydream about worlds behind mist and cornfield servants when you’re watching people be turned into grotesque experiments that had them, sometimes quite literally and loudly, begging for death.
Mahito is looking down at you now, staring expectantly. 
“He’s a character,” you say, fidgeting on the floor. “From a book series.” You look down, flip a page in your book, although you haven’t finished reading the last one, and ask, casually as you can muster: “Why?”
Mahito, up above, flips a page. You can hear the wobble in the paper--not a bound book, that’s for certain. And there’s some low, primal sense that shivers through you which says, plainly, that he’s actually reading whatever’s in front of him. 
“You write about him a lot.”
Oh.
Low, slimy dread filters into your stomach. Thick and gelatinous, resting at the bottom of your belly like an unwanted slug. 
“I… don’t know what you mean,” you say, voice only half-there, because while you are apparently stupid enough to lie to Mahito’s face, you’re not stupid enough to think he’ll believe you. 
You are just stupid enough to think that he won’t know exactly how deep your interest in this particular character goes; before Mahito took you, you thought about him all the time. You’d take walks and daydream about him, write story after story; you’d even commissioned fanart of him, because it wasn’t like there was a plethora of fanart for a character from a middle grade horror book. 
Mahito huffs out a sigh. Quick and short, it sends a shock right down your stomach. 
“Get you a man,” he starts, and confusion buzzes through your brain until he continues. “Who is an otherworldly entity that is so petty when an 11 year old beats him that he traps her in another world, leaving her to a fate worse than death, and laughs until he cries about it.”
You wrote that. There’s a vague memory of when you posted it--after you’d taken a walk, you think, and reread your favorite parts in the books for a few hours. But the way Mahito says it makes it sound--you don’t know how to explain it. Like saying the words out loud almost pains him; they come out clipped and bitter. 
Bitter? But why?
He doesn’t stop there. He reads something else, voice getting higher, almost mocking the way you talk. And that bitterness is still there, a thread continuing through every syllable.
“What if we kissed in the corn maze before you turned me into a scarecrow servant whose soul slowly gets dried out and useless and in the end you feed it, crunchy and tasteless, to your hellhound.” 
He takes a breath. Then--
“One particular aspect of the Smiling Man’s cruelty that I truly adore is that he can make people feel understood. He can make them feel like he cares, like he’s lending a listening ear, like he’s wanting to help them out and make them feel nice.”
Another breath--and he continues, again and again, reading your posts. Quoting your stories. Listing off the titles, the imagine posts, everything you’ve said about him.
All the while, bitter and mocking, his voice raising now and then in an imitation of your own. 
Then he gets to the last page of his clearly self-created tome and stares down at you, waiting, expectant. 
And you… you actually glare up at him. 
Because you're scared, sure. You’re always scared in some way, when you’re with Mahito. But there’s something else too, something that digs its way out of the rot in your gut and sticks up a petulant middle finger.
How dare he do this. How dare he take something that was yours and make it his; put it in his mouth and sneer over it. 
“Have you been--” Your mouth sticks together, refusing to let you accuse him of what you know he’s been doing. Stalking your online profiles. “That’s… that’s private,” is what you finally mutter, cheeks feeling hot and that half-buried petulance pushing you forward. “It’s not any of your business.” 
“Private?” He mutters the word softly, cradling the sound.
And then--
Mahito doesn’t often move fast around you. He prefers to be slow, languid. Calculating. You think it’s because that terrifies you more.
But now, in a moment, he goes from being slouched in his hammock to leaping down and crouching right in your face--there’s sudden pain in your head, and you realize he’s grabbed your hair and yanked it back.
That metaphorical middle finger sinks back down into the slimy gut sludge.
“Not from me,” he says, low, a warning. “Not for you.”
This is all it takes for tears to prick inside your eyes.
Mahito’s lips quirk up. Just a little. Just enough for you to notice.
“You’re going to cry already? I didn’t even do anything.”
Your eyes dart up and back, towards where he’s currently gripping your hair hard enough for it to sting.
He sighs through his nose. “This isn’t anything. You know that. Don’t be childish now.”
But--he lets go of your hair, and doesn’t grab for you when you scoot backwards on your blanket nest. Instead, he plops himself down, crossing his legs and resting his chin on his elbow.
You don’t speak. You don’t want to, and you don’t know what to say. Sometimes it’s better to be quiet around Mahito, so he doesn’t get ideas. Although he comes up with them on his own just fine, even if you try to stay silent.
It’s Mahito who breaks the silence.
“Why do you like him so much?”
How silly, to feel embarrassed right now. With the creature in front of you, and what he can do. But that’s what makes your cheeks burn: embarrassment. 
“I don’t know,” you mumble, because while you are stupid in so many ways, you’re still smart enough to know he wants an answer. “I guess I just like antagonist characters sometimes.” Well, most of the time. But it’s better to keep that from Mahito, if you can.
Mahito’s lips quirk here and there while he thinks. Then he looks at you with something like genuine confusion.
“You say that you like how awful he is. The awful things he does. So…” He tilts his head a little. “You should like me. Right?”
Your fingers pick at the loose threads of your clothes. Your eyes don’t meet his entirely--they flick up and down, from your legs to his face. 
“It’s not the same thing,” is what you come up with. But how to explain that to a curse?
Mahito frowns. 
“I don’t understand.” No bitterness, no pouting. A simple statement of fact.
“He’s not real.” You swallow against the minefield that all of this is making you step through, hoping you’ll avoid them. “But you are. That makes it different.” 
Mahito leans forward, grabbing your wrists, pulling you closer to him with a yanking, childish gesture.
“So you should like me more,” he says, a slight pout in his tone. “Because I can really do those things.” His eyebrows raise, and you swear you can hear a buzzing light bulb go off. “I could turn someone into a scarecrow for you.” He smiles, sudden, excited. “Do you want me to find some school children to torment?”
“No!” Your voice cracks. There are brief images in your mind--the people he’s tortured and killed, experimented with, before you were here and while you’re here and probably after you’re dead and gone--and you shake them away. 
Mahito’s eyebrows furrow. He groans and rolls his eyes backwards until they are entirely white, not in mockery or an attempt to scare you, but in irritation. Fingers squeeze your wrists briefly and let go, and you stay quiet, trying to fight your urge to cry, until Mahito slowly rolls his eyes back to stare at you.
His gaze flicks over you, until he catches your eyes with his. 
“You won’t write about him anymore.”
You don’t take a moment to answer this time.
“I won’t.”
“You won’t read those books anymore.”
“I won’t,” you stay. “I haven’t. I--don’t even have copies anymore.”
Mahito smiles, a little. Maybe it’s a good thing you never asked him to find you a copy, a thought which had been a brief temptation a while back.
And then he leans in closer again, until his nose touches yours.
“You won’t think about him anymore,” he says, quiet, solemn. Not an order but a matter of fact. 
You don’t answer. You swallow against a bitter taste in  your throat; you swear, sometimes, that the sludge in your gut is real and tries to make its way out sometimes.
Mahito presses his nose against yours until it starts to hurt.
“You won’t,” he says again, this time more to himself. “I’ll make sure of it.”
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buckyalpine · 7 months
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I’m going to redo this story. Here is a version I wrote that I feel is okay but I have another version in mind so I’ll write that tooo. I didn’t want to throw this away completely so maybe at least 1 person will like this 😭 @paulasocean another version is coming bb ❤️
-
"Okay, I can't for the life of me remember what happened during this mission" Nat grumbled while sitting in the conference room, catching up on paper work after Fury had demanded all mission reports be handed in by the end of the week.
"Honestly, neither can I" Steve shook his head, rubbing his temples, the past few months all melting into a blur. Everyone had been running back to back missions, prioritizing actually saving people over filling out reports. "I only filled out half of it and before I could finish, someone put it away"
"Please tell me it's somewhere in this building, I can't spend the rest of the day writing about how many time Steve jumped off a roof with zero protection" Bucky groaned, most of his mission reports consisting of all the recklessness his bestfriend did.
"Go check the records room, someone probably filed it there" Tony suggested while Bucky nodded, heading down to the very bottom of the compound where there were rooms upon rooms filled with documents on every criminal and terrorist organization to exist as well as individual cases. Steve and Nat followed, the both of them wandering through the shelves where the most recent reports were, quickly locating the latest one.
"He's this big billionaire with the most advanced technology in the world and but he's keeping records in the basement like a creepy grandpa" Nat huffed, scanning the shelves.
"You'd think he'd have these all digitized by now, given how much he loves technology" Steve snorted while Bucky remained silent, preoccupied with a different row of shelves that caught his eye. His heart hammered a little harder than usual as he looked at the five full floor to ceiling shelves that were solely for Hydra. He was sure at least two shelves would be for his atrocities alone.
"Buck, c'mon" Steve patted Bucky's shoulder, already seeing where his bestfriends mind spiraled, "Nat found what she needed, let's get out of here punk"
"Just-give me a second" Bucky murmured, opening one of the drawers and flipping through the papers, swallowing thickly at some of the agents he'd recognized, ones that had tortured him to no end.
That's when another face caught his eye.
His blood ran cold, flipping through the pages faster, hoping there was some sort of mistake.
It couldn't be.
It was your face, over and over again but under a different name.
Svetlana Petrovitch
"St-Steve?"
"What is it Buck" Steve frowned, seeing the color drain from Bucky's face, taking the file from his hands, his own eyes growing wide.
"Please tell me that isn't her"
"That's y/n" Steve murmured, not understanding where there was a file on you at all, let alone why it was associated with Hydra. Bucky grabbed the filed back before looking at others, his anxiety only getting worse. "Svetlana?"
"These aren't files on those who were taken or held captive. This whole shelf is just for agents who have worked for Hydra throughout the years. They're all Hydra agents"
Bucky needed it to be a mistake, a misprint, a file placed in the wrong section, you were his whole world, you would've told him if you were associated with hydra. His mouth wen dry, clutching onto the papers as he wordlessly made his way back up to find you.
You had been gone all morning, insisting you were just going to grab coffee but now he had his suspicions. You usually always asked him to tag along everywhere but every so often, about every two weeks, you would disappear on your own for hours on end.
He'd also hear you speaking to someone on the phone in hushed whispers but he'd never once questioned it but based on what he'd just seen, he had no idea what to believe.
Who were you.
He tossed the file onto the table as soon as he saw you in the room, the tick in his jaw worrying you. You got up, making your way over to brush his cheek, freezing when he stepped away from your touch as if it would burn him. Everyone left the room, sensing this was a private moment between you both.
"Bucky, is everything okay-
"Where were you"
"I-
"Tell me where you were this morning"
Your heart sank to your stomach, the guilt plastered on your face causing his emotional turmoil to worsen.
"I-I told you I went for coffee" Your shaky voice lacked truth, only confirming his suspicious further.
"Did you work for Hydra?"
"Bucky-
"Y/n, it's a yes or no question, were you a hydra agent or not"
"I-
The fact that you hadn't said no, the fact that you looked guilty, unable to look at him directly in the face was enough to send Bucky over the edge.
"H-how could you?!”
"James, you don't understand!-
"No. No" Bucky shook his head, tears welling in his eyes, his stomach twisting in knots. "Don't. Just don't"
"Baby, please just listen to me-
"Is y/n your name? Hm?" His eyes were red from unshed tears, a part of him still desperately hoping this was all a bad dream. That his girl, the woman he trusted with his entire life, was really who he thought she was, "Or is it Svetlana. You were part of them. You probably still are, is that why you came here? Did you pretend to love me all this time just to get me back to them? Is this what all of our relationship was to you? Find a way to get the Winter Soldier back?"
"Bucky stop!" You cried out, your voice cracking, wiping away at your wet cheeks. You couldn't get a word in as he backed away from you, shaking his head, feeling disgust and confusion at the same time. His heart yearned for you but he wouldn't be able to over come this. "Please-
"There's nothing to listen to. How-how can I ever trust you again" His throat felt like it was being squeezed shut all over again, just like the days Hydra strapped a collar on him to hold him in place every time he was wiped. "I don't even know who you are anymore. I-I love you but I can't-
"Bucky don't do this, just let me explain-
"YOU CAN'T! THERE'S NOTHING FOR YOU TO EXPLAIN!" He snapped, making you flinch back. "You-you could've told me! How am I supposed to trust you?! I've told you my darkest memories and-and fuck, you would've already known, right? This was all a game to you, you would've already known everything I'd ever done. Were you part of that too? Huh? Did you also have a say in all the shit they did to me when I was under their control?"
"NO!" You shook your head, covering your ears, unable to take the words he was saying to you, never in a million years would you ever have done such a thing to the man you loved with your entire being. "Jamie, I would never, I love you, just sit down with me baby, please-
"I'm sorry. We're done. For good. I can't even look at you. You know I love you, fuck, I-do you have any way how much I love you" Bucky's voice dropped to a whisper, moving to softly cup your face in his hands, brushing away at the tears that continued to spill from your lashes. He traced his thumbs along your soft cheeks on last time, his soul feeling like it was being ripped from his body as he dropped his arms back to his sides. "But I can't do this"
He stormed out of the room without looking back leaving you torn, broken and sobbing. You ran past the others who were still worriedly waiting outside and right to your room, locking it, instructing FRIDAY to forbid anyone else from entering.
It didn't take long for you to pack all your things. You didn't have much.
You never did.
You left behind all of Bucky's Henleys that you'd stolen along with all the sweet gifts he'd bought you on your dresser; you figured he wouldn't want to see you anyway.
You had left the compound by that night.
-
Steve signed at the sight of his best friend spending another night destroying himself at the gym, dark red stains covering the leather of the nearly torn punching bag.
"No one knew?" Bucky's voice was hoarse from nights of crying and getting by on coffee and taking out his frustrations out on the gym. He'd stayed in his room for days on end, not speaking to anyone, his head and heart aching. His knuckles were split from how hard he'd been punching the bag, only to be held back by Steve who couldn't stand to see Bucky like this anymore.
"No. None of us knew anything. I spoke to Tony, those files were sent to us directly through SHIELD. When Tony ran his background checks, everything came up clear. There's gotta be more to this Buck. Why don’t you-"
"I loved her" Bucky shook his head, still feeling betrayed over all the things he didn't know. "But I can't"
Weeks went by and Bucky grew more reckless. Not having the love of his life by his side coupled by the fact that there were so many unanswered questions pushed him further and further to the edge. He hated that he still dreamt about you every night, tossing and turning in his cold bed, without you there to keep him safe and warm. You were on his mind every single day and every single part of him wanted to know where you'd gone, how you were doing, guilt starting to eat a him.
He never gave you a chance to explain yourself, jumping at you the second he thought you had strong ties with Hydra, that you were an agent yourself. He'd never even let you get a word in, breaking things off without a second guess.
To make things worse, he'd gone as far as accusing you of also being part of all the pain he'd been put through.
No one knew where you'd gone.
Except Tony.
-
"Just tell me where she is" Bucky ran his hands through his already messy hair, pacing up and down Tony's office while the billionaire sighed. "Please"
"I can't. She asked me not to and I can't break that Barnes. Plus you broke up with her, it's not like she left cause she wanted to"
The guilt that was already eating at him only worsened as he sat down in defeat, angrily wiping his face.
"Is there anything you can tell me? Something? Anything, I'll take anything at this point, I fucked up so badly"
"The most I can do is let you know if she comes back or if she wants to talk to you"
Bucky didn't press the issue more, taking it upon himself to scour the records room again to see if there was anything else on you but he came up short. There were no other files on a person with the last name Petrovitch. He never actually looked through your file properly, feeling too much anxiety from the first time he'd seen it. When he bothered to read it again, there was hardly any information, only having a few fuzzy pictures of you at the base with some other agents as well as how long you'd been there for.
There was one place he'd get his answers from.
SHIELD.
-
"Who is y/n"
"Sargent"
"TELL ME" Bucky's voice nearly shattered the glass, causing Fury to flinch while the others took a step back. After Tony didn't reveal your location, Bucky went straight to the head office, his brooding glare alone getting him instant access to the top floor. The team accompanied him for moral support but also to keep things under control just in case, everyone standing in the directors office on edge. "You kept this from me, from everyone here, I need to know, what does she have to do with Hydra"
Fury sighed, pulling out a thick file from a second safe, dropping it onto the table, shifting through papers before pulling out one of a picture from when you were young. Bucky recognized the twinkling eyes, his heart breaking all over again for the young little girl in the picture, lost and innocent.
How the hell did he think you'd been an agent.
"Y/n, y/l/n. Originally named Svetlana Petrovich by Hydra. Her birth mother had been used as an experiment to procreate more super soldiers in case the serum couldn't be replicated. The serum didn't take so she was rendered useless. Her mother was never seen again. Her supposed father was one of the many soldiers who had been given a different version of what Sargent Barnes has"
Bucky was frozen in place as Fury spoke, feeling absolute agony over the words he's said to you. Your broken face and pleading voice played over and over again, making him nauseous.
"Hydra kept the child in hopes of using training her into a weapon. She was cared for by a woman who was appointed to be her handler. She raised the child differently, without anyone else knowing. Don't ask me how she did it, we don't even have a name"
Everyone continued to listen in stunned silence while he spoke.
"Agent y/l/n wanted to escape but remained at the base to ensure no one hurt the woman who had taken care of her. She didn't go on any missions but she was trained to be one of the strongest soldiers they had, hence the images of her at the base with other Hydra operatives. She remained there until the woman's death and escaped the very same night. We recruited her a few years later"
"How do you know all this and why didn't anyone know" Steve stepped in while Bucky remained silent, trying desperately not to break down. Not only had you been born into the worst situation but you only remained there to protect the one person who was like a mother to you after you lost your own.
"I have my ways, Captain. She didn't want anyone to know. She wasn't proud of the fact that she'd been brought up in such a place. She left it all behind but wanted to use her skills for good. There's a reason she one of your top agents. She didn't learn those skills from just anywhere"
Bucky wordlessly walked out of the room, unable to sit and hear another word. His heart broke for the baby who'd been forced into Hydra's hands without a fighting chance. Yes, you had been raised by someone who wanted to love and care for you but you'd been tortured and trained more than anyone else and after you finally escaped with a life for yourself, he'd accused you of betraying him. He hated that he had come to Fury for answers when he could've just let you speak instead, letting his own anger cloud his judgement. He still didn't know where you'd disappeared to or who you'd be on the phone with but Bucky had to speak to you, no matter what it took.
-
"I'm only giving you her location because she sounds miserable and I'm assuming it's because she misses you. If she pulls a gun my head because of this, its on you" Tony mumbled, scribbling something onto a sheet of paper and stuffing it into Bucky's hand. "You better grovel your ass off"
Bucky couldn't care less about traffic laws as he swerved through the streets to get to you, his motorbike revving through the city till he reached a dingy looking apartment building. He frowned, double checking the address before parking his bike and walking to the lobby. Bucky made his way to the concierge, the man seemingly recognizing him immediately.
"Sargent, I'm assuming you're the boy she's been moping over" The man at the front desk gave him a pointed look, giving him a key and directing him to go to the top floor before he could even say anything. Bucky's cheeks reddened with embarrassment, nodding with a thank you before dashing off to get to you.
As soon as the elevator doors opened, he was surprised to find the peeling and dusty hall way empty with just one door right in the middle. His heart hammered against his chest as he shakily raised his hand to knock. He could hear shuffling on the other side, wiping his palm against his jeans when he hard the lock click open.
"Baby, I'm so sorry I- oh-mam, I'm sorry, I must have the wrong address-“
An elderly woman opened the door, her eyes twinkling as she looked him up and down, taking his metal hand in hers and pulling him inside. Bucky stood in confused silence as he entered the large apartment, which was a stark contrast to the mess it appeared to be on the outside. The interior was sleek; the apartment large enough to take up the entire floor. It made sense why the whole hall only had one door. A large living area was off to the right, decorated with a mix of abstract and modern art; a lot of the pieces reminding him of things that you would paint yourself-
"You must be James" she hummed, taking him into the living room while Bucky's jaw was still hanging, utterly perplexed over where he was. "Let me get your girl"
"My girl?"
Before he could get another word in, the woman disappeared, coming back moments later, dragging you with her. You stood stiffly, refusing to meet his eyes while she huffed, giving you a gentle push towards him.
"Now you both sit and talk" And with that, she left.
"Y/n" Bucky want to fall to his knees and beg you to forgive him, his heart breaking over the way you looked at him like a stranger. The eyes that used to hold so much love, so much spark were now hollow and empty and full of hurt.
"No. You didn't even give me a chance to explain myself Bucky" You kept your voice as steady as you possibly could, your throat already starting to grow painfully tight. You weren't one to cry easily, especially after years of training to repress your emotions but Bucky was your weakness.
"I know. I was wrong, I should've listened to you, it was so wrong of me, I-It's just-I'm not excusing myself, I promise, it's just-I didn't know what to think and I'd always hear you on the phone, sometimes you'd disappear for hours and you wouldn't tell me where, I-I'm sorry I thought the worst when I saw that file. It doesn't change the fact that I didn't let you get a word in. I'm so sorry angel"
You sighed, letting your heart soften. You knew Bucky came with his own baggage of trust issues and while you'd wanted to tell him about the phone calls and visits, you worried about if any of it would make him uncomfortable.
"It was my mother" You whispered, anxiously fidgeting with your fingers, "That's who I'd call and come to see. Well my adoptive mother. Handler. She was like a mother to me"
"But-I thought-" Bucky blinked in confusion, Fury had made it clear the woman had passed before you escaped, "She's alive?"
"I helped her escape with me. We faked her death so they wouldn't come searching for her. She had been captured there to work as a nurse. We changed our names. I didn’t want her living there anymore after I left. This is her place; Tony was nice enough to renovate a penthouse for me without asking questions. Before I joined the team, we'd lay low in cheap rentals. Now I know she's always safe. The concierge is a trained agent"
Bucky felt an inkling of hope when he stepped towards you and you didn't step back. He nervously brought his hand to hold yours, letting out the breath he was holding when you didn't pull away.
"Please forgive me baby, I-I should've given you a chance to explain, I'm so sorry" Bucky squeezed your hand, his thumb coming to brush away the tear that trailed down your cheek.
"You hurt me" You whispered, sniffling. "I'm not upset that you got mad or felt hurt and confused. But you thought I was an agent Bucky. You-you thought I'd do something to hurt you" The last word barely made it out as the first sob escaped. You were able to take Bucky's hurt and confused but no the fact that he'd doubt your love for him, "Did you think I-I didn't love you?"
"No! I shouldn't have said that, I'm sorry baby. For everything. For everything you had to go through, for everything I said. I shouldn't have acted like that. I should have trusted you, I know you love me, no one's ever loved me the way you do doll"
“How could you not trust me. Why didn’t you at least let me explain it to you Bucky”
“I know baby, m'so sorry" Seeing your walls crumble made Bucky's heart ache, his body moving on its own to wrap you in a protective hug. He hated to be the cause of your tears, understanding why you'd been nervous to tell him about your past. Of course you came with your own traumas from Hydra and even though he endured similar things, it still wasn't easy to open up about. "Will you please come back home? You don't have to stay in our room, you don't even have to forgive me, just- please baby"
You melted into his embrace having missed his warmth, his scent, his safe arms.
"I should have told you. I-I was scared-
"Shhh, I understand. You don't have to explain it, m'sorry i didn't know and lashed out. Please come home baby" He whispered against your hair, kissing the top of your head while keeping you pressed to his body. You nodded against his chest, too lost in hugging him back to notice your mother's watery smile or happy sniffles.
"Take me home, Bucky"
-
Of course after you'd come home, Bucky continued to earn your forgiveness, making sure you understood he'd never doubted your feelings for him. He starts to join you as well when you go to visit your mother, blushing when she calls him handsome. Butterflies erupt in his tummy when she give him her blessing while he fidgets with a ring he'd bought, keeping it safely in a velvet box for the right moment.
During vulnerable nights there are times where he needs you to hold him and nights where you need him just as much. He loves that he can comfort and hold you too, letting you pour your heart out when you feel like it or humming soft lullabies till you fall asleep when you don't feel like talking. One thing that is for sure, he'd never push you away from him again. There no one else on this earth that he loves and trusts more than you.
Once again, this version was meant to be trashed so. pls.
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lovetei · 11 months
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Heyyy,
I saw your toxic things the demon bros will do to keep you with them and i absolutely fell in love with. More of, my mental health issues felll in love with- ANYGAYSzz
I was wondering if you could maybe do the same for the side characters¿¿¿¿
Also did you drink water today? Cuz if thats a no here you go 💧💧💧💧
And some cookies just incase 🍪🍪🍪🍪🍪
Love anonymous 👑
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I'm not actually supposed to post anything for tonight, because I don't know? I didn't get to start anything this morning so I crammed this post T_T
But love lots! Hope you enjoy this piece ^^
But seriously, I was like "Oh shit, the algorithm I don't have!" And proceed to finish this.
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What are the most toxic thing they will do in a relationship just to make you stay with them?
Versions: Demon brothers, Side Characters
Warnings: Manipulation, yandere themes, execution, mention of torture, psychological torture, love potions, Mentions of murder, framing, alcohol
Links: Masterlist
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DIAVOLO will use his authority
He's already so happy to have you by his side
And by staying there you already secured the position of the next ruler that will stand beside him
So, why do you have to leave..?
And the reasons
"I'm not fit enough..."
"I don't deserve this much..!"
"There are more people out there that are more worthy than me..."
Won't cut it.
He knows your worth and he's sure you do too.
So why?
Perhaps you're just nervous that you won't be able to match his grace?
You don't need to.
His grace is unmatched among the demons and yours is too among the mortals.
You both are on the same chapter, just on different pages.
So why make things hard for yourself?!
All you need to do is say yes and everything will be taken care of.
Clothes, food, money, status, security and literally anything.
He loves you and you does too so it's not going to be a marriage with no love...
SO WHY?
You're starting to drive him insane, MC.
And he might just do the same to you
So he'll invite you over for a fancy dinner and a few drinks
You accepted, despite knowing that Diavolo might try something after he got you drunk
Thinking that Diavolo forgot that you can't get drunk by just a basic demonus
Fool
That's what you are for thinking Diavolo actually misses something, anything about you
So he changed the bottle of demonus to an actual human liquor but neutralized it's taste by the help of his one, loyal servant
Barbatos
Not even two hour passed by and you're already putty in his hands
Dancing just like how he wants it on his palms
Then he'll slide a paper into the table to you, together with a beautiful pen
He then point at an empty line with his finger and said "Look at that MC, this line right here wants your signature."
"Hmm, why?~"
"Because it's such a huge fan of you and it needs you to become something, someone better, so why don't you give it a sign?" Is what he said while smirking.
And there you are, signing the papers while your mind is clouded with alcohol
Oh what is it?
Just a marriage contract
You don't want it?
Look into rules and regulations, Claus 5
It's against your human rights?
How foolish, you're not in the human world.
You will tell the whole Devildom about it?
Lèse majesté
And what's the punishment for committing that? Simple.
Death.
BARBATOS and his timeline power
He loves you
So much actually
At first, it was fun to be in a relationship with him
It's fun, slowly opening him up like a present and seeing the gift, a part of him that only you know.
He builds up trust for you and so do you for him
Then it started to get suffocating
He won't admit it openly but you know,
You know that the one who kills anyone who dared act close with you is him
And it terrifies you
You may allow it if it actually harms you, severely
But it's not for your protection anymore
He's doing it out of pure annoyance now
He doesn't like you around the brothers
The angels
Solomon
Thirteen
Or even Lord Diavolo
In fact, he doesn't want you around anyone.
And it's making you feel more unsafe
He's starting to isolate you from everyone and everything
He's trying to isolate you from the world
So you decided to end things with him
And he doesn't seem to take it lightly like how you expected...
How did you know?
Simple.
You woke up weeks before that break up happened
You know how it happened and you know who made it happen
It's none other than your boyfriend of course
You thought that maybe if you talk nicely with him he'll actually understand the problem
But he didn't
He started to get more and more aggressive with you
Then when the week end
It repeats
And repeats
And repeats
And repeats again
And again
But it will keep going on like that until you learn
Until you learn that there's no other option than him
No other ending than him
He doesn't mind driving you crazy if it means you'll continue to love him
So good luck, MC.
SIMEON might just ask Father for help
Ho doesn't understand!
Why would you want to break up with him?!
He did everything, MC!
It's not clear!
Nothing is clear!
You just belive that you two are not fit together..?
You don't want him to end up like Lilith..?
He doesn't care!
He'll burn these precious, white wings for you!
He'll kill for you!
He'd actually prefer to end up like Lilith rather than this!
Because, at least, Lilith managed to be with her love until her life ended...
He'd rather be a demon or a human rather then live like the adored angel he is without you...
...
You'll still leave huh?
Alright then.
I guess he has no choice but to ask Father for help
What do you mean it will cause him to fall? Oh dear, it won't.
It might actually even promote him into a higher rank.
Father wants you in his side.
In fact, the whole celestial realm want you on this side
So when he asked "Father, it seems that we need to take even larger measure to have MC side with us. What do you think we can do?"
...oh?
Luke?
What a brilliant plan.
Now,
Let's see if you can still leave knowing an innocent life, Luke, will be put under danger because of this tantrum,
Because of you.
SOLOMON and his hidden antics
Oh dear, angel
His little devil
His most prized possession
His favorite concubine,
You won't be leaving him anytime soon, dear.
When you told him that "I want to break up with you."
He kept himself quite for a while before answering "Let me give it some thought, MC. For now, stay with me."
And just as he expected you listened obediently.
But then, his grip around your waits became more rough
And the hand he used to playfully wrap around your neck became more tight
It's hard...
It's hard to feed you his love laced cooking
But he found out that you just loves, adored even, Luke's baked cookies...
And since you're a human, he knows that Luke creates special cookies just for you
One that don't contain exotic ingredients that will upset your stomach
And it just made the work of latching love potions easier for him
He'll just add a few drops and it will do the magic for him
So, all he has to do sit tight
And wait for you to crawl back to his lap yourself.
RAPHAEL will use spears for example
Haha...
But he loves you, MC..?
He might just start crying if you say more
"Sure... But I'll make sure you'll come back to me..!"
At first, it sounded like a joke and it's funny enough to make you giggle
The beautiful memories of peaceful separation didn't last long after you saw a dead body pinned by spears though
His spears, to be specific
It doesn't even make sense
You don't even know this guy...
He hasn't talk to you and you don't even know him
Hell, you don't even recognize his face...
So what's the catch?
Why is he killing completely random people...
That's what have been running around your mind
You haven't seen him around RAD anymore
And if you do he refuse to answer your questions
Except his face will lightly flush and he'll even smile a little before sa say "Ah~ It's nice hearing your voice..."
His tone, the way he says it, none of theme are innocent
And he made it known that he knows what he's doing
The curiosity didn't last long
Until you found out that the corpses aren't for you from him as a threat
It was for the families of the victims
You found out that each of them have high power among the nobilities of Devildom
And he killed them to make the families think that you're telling him to do so
It's not to make you feel guilty, it for them to start attacking you
Until you're pushed back to a corner where no one else can save you
Except for him.
MEPHISTOPHELES's way only
Ha...
Man he loves you so much...
But all he do is stare at you blankly after you told him you ant to break up
Staring at you like you're just some kid throwing a tantrum
It's Mephistopheles in front of you, I mean, he's rich, handsome, tall, smart and has good family background
If he's a human everybody would have gone crazy over him already
Plus he wears heels and he has a sexy cane
What more could you ask for?
But yeah...
You don't want to be with him forever?
Sure, he'll talk to Diavolo.
"I'll buy MC's contract and I'll put them under my wing." Is all the reason he needs to say and a few more to have Diavolo selling you
What about your family?
This amount will do right?
I mean...
He paid for what your worth so don't expect it to be much.
Anyways, you're his now
By the eyes of the law, money and his
He'll never let you get away?
And if you did try to?
He'll simply frame you for treason and let's see if you won't come crawling back to him
After finding out that he can choose what type of punishment, torture method, to give you.
But don't worry.
He likes the game cat and mouse
He don't like playing it for a long time though
So be careful
His patience isn't as long as the line of money and connection ahead of him
THIRTEEN basically holds your life
Break up?
"You're not." Is all she said as she holds your candle
She's grinning widely as she let your candle melt, its 's wax falling directly in her hands
"Why would you even want to?" She asked even though she knows, no reason can separate the two of you
And if you did say "I don't care." as she holds you candle
She might just accidentally extinguish one of your loved ones candles
So be careful, MC.
Among everyone
She's the only one who won't joke around.
And just so you know
Her patience is shorter than the amount of time it requires to kill someone's fire off of their candle.
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pandalorian36 · 2 months
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Spencer reid x (gn)reader
A late night working ends with the both of you falling asleep on the couch where the rest of the team find you the following morning.
Word count: 885 Warnings: none
I stifle another yawn stretching out in the chair "Do we have any more coffee?" Spencer jerks upright a sheet of paper stuck to his cheek "What?" I chuckle leaning over and removing it "Maybe we should take a break?" he nods and stands stretching pushing hair out of his face "How is it one already?" I shrug and spin around in my chair before standing "Everyone else went home at ten? I thought it had only been an hour."
He grins "Although time does appear to pass faster when you are working." I hold up a hand "Hold up brains. It is far too late...early for that. As much as I love you and your info dumps now is not the time." he chuckles "Sorry."
We make our way to the small kitchen finding clean cups and coffee. A weight drapes over my shoulders as arms snake around my waist "What happened to being professional in the workplace?" he mumbles something into my neck that sounds like "Alone."
I turn around wrapping my arms around him sighing happily "We could go home." he sighs "I want to get this done." I nod "I know so do I." he smiles pressing a gentle kiss to my forehead then my lips, I melt into his touch cupping his cheek gently "We should get back to work." he sighs kissing my cheek "Okay." grabbing the two cups of coffee in one hand and my hand in the other we make our way back to the office sitting on the sofa and dragging some of the files closer.
We spend another hour working getting almost everything complete when I decide I want to be more comfortable so bring my feet up onto the sofa leaning my head on Spencer’s shoulder. I manage another page before I can no longer fight the heaviness of my eyes. I am vaguely aware of the files falling to the ground Spencer’s head leaning against mine.
3rd person narrator
Penelope, Emily, and Derek are the first to arrive the next morning. Penelope looks over at the conference room confused "Did you guys leave the light on?"
"Y/N and Reid where going to stay late. They probably just forgot." Hotch and Rossi walk over sighing "Conference room. We've got work to do." They all make their way over Derek and Emily freezing in the doorway grinning broadly. "Oh my god."
Y/N has their head in Spencer’s lap while Spencer has an arm draped over their waist head sliding down the sofa slightly the both of them fast asleep a pile of files on the floor where they have slipped out of their hands. Garcia is quick to snap a photo while laughing "That is adorable."
Hotch clears his throat loudly startling the two sleeping agents "Good morning." Y/N scrambles to their feet "We fell asleep." Rossi chuckles "We can see that."
Reid stands up brushing fingers through his hair while Morgan laughs ruffling it up more "Bit of a bird’s nest there pretty boy." Reid swats his hand away the others taking seats around the table. Hotch has the barest smile visible on his face "So you where productive last night?"
You grin grabbing the files of the floor "Actually yes. Where's it gone?" Spencer sorts through the remaining files on the table finding the one you are looking for "Here."
"Thank you." Garcia starts giggling though quickly stops at the questioning looks from her superiors "Sorry sir." Spencer and you talk through your work while Garcia continues to grin at her computer. Rossi smiles "I suppose we shouldn't be shocked the two of you completed three days of work in a single evening."
Once we have finished going over the files Hotch takes over summarising and organising, but it doesn't take too long. Morgan grins at something Garcia shows him "You two sure looked cozy on the sofa." Spencer blushes scratching the back of his head "I think I need some coffee."
"Pump your breaks pretty boy. I think you and Y/N have something to share with the group." I feel my eyes widen as I recall going to get coffee, we forgot about the cameras. Emily and JJ grin moving around the table to view Penelope’s laptop while Spencer buries his face in his hands in attempt to hide the blush while you remain frozen in place "I knew it." Emily groans "Damn." Morgan holds out his hand "Cough up."
Rossi and Hotch both look equally confused while Spencer is now resembling a tomato. I sigh "Well the cats already out the bag. Yes, we are dating. He asked me first. It’s been nine months."
"Nine months!" Garcia whoops "I win." Hotch shakes his head slightly at the group’s antics "Just keep things professional in the workplace." If possible, Spencer turns a deeper shade of red sputtering slightly while Morgan grins broadly "I think this the first time we've seen you at a loss for words."
I stand making my way to Spencer’s side he takes my hand in his squeezing it gently. While Emily sighs "It is so obvious how did we miss it." The others start pestering us with questions, but I am glad they know. We are a family, a strange family definitely but a family none the less.
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babywll · 2 years
Text
She's My Wife — Daemon Targaryen × F!Reader
summary: Daemon can be considered the rogue prince, cruel and greedy. But not when it comes to you
tws: enemies to lovers but he is already in lovers
LOOK AT THIS MAN
part 2 here
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After the queen's death, your sister. You found yourself completely lost, and increasingly pressured to get married. You couldn't think straight, or at least give opinions to the candidates the king put forward. Viserys was being kind, even more so when he didn't send you away. You knew you would have to please him somehow.
Then as if everything had been completed, Daemon appeared, he was the king's first choice, who quickly made it all line up with the two of you betrothed.
You hated the idea, since Prince Daemon had his history, his long and terrible history. You believed you deserved better, but at that moment, you just agreed, you didn't want to be a burden to anyone. He was wanted, no doubt. Many women in the realm wanted to be in your shoes, and you tried to ignore Daemon's bad things.
You got married, and your niece presented you with the Dragonstone. It was a beautiful castle, and you could easily get used to it. Daemon was a mere detail. You assumed he'd be having a lot more fun with his dates and their silly fights. You assumed he wouldn't stay there, with you.
But he became present, and protective. He was always around, and you gradually grew closer. It was just you and him. At some point you stopped trying to pretend you didn't like him. He was quite loving when he wanted to be. And then you realized it was just like that with you.
You thought you'd never see Daemon, the same rogue prince everyone knew, giving you attention and being a great husband. Until four months together you had never touched again after marriage. You didn't get pregnant by choice and things went on with you married, you could maybe one day even become friends. The prince certainly had his means of satisfying himself, then it wouldn't be a problem.
You certainly wouldn't think that things would change, and that this marriage would actually turn into something more.
But you ignored all the signs. Or at least tried.
You had just finished your shower, and you were reading a book before getting ready for bed. You two used not to sleep in the same room, he made a point of asking you as soon you two moved to Dragstone. You decided it was unnecessary to share a room. Until the king found out about it, and sent a letter asking you about the decision. So you guys started sharing a room.
Daemon had been gone for ten days on a mission, you heard he came back in the morning, but so far you hadn't seen each other. The night already prevails for some hours, and none of it appears in your room.
You decided that you would finally check on him in his office. Which was where he was.
You walked the stone corridors with only a silk robe hiding your nearly transparent nightgown. You knocked on the door, and entered when you heard him say. His white hair fell down his neck, he had his head down, looking at papers.
"I thought I'd come see you," you said, and he finally looked in your direction.
Maybe it was just you, the candle lights could be getting in the way. But you were pretty sure you noticed the look he gave your body, he was slowly looking down from your eyes. You crossed your arms over your body. There was no reason, since he's already seen you naked, but still, it made you feel vulnerable.
"I am grateful for your last minute decision" he smiled slightly, and you rolled your eyes "I thought you were already asleep, I didn't want to wake you up so I spent more time here" he relaxed in the chair.
"I was waiting for you" you said, almost as if you were confessing.
A glint appeared in his eyes, he was surely just waiting for the moment when you showed something for him.
"I'm sorry I didn't come sooner" he got up from his chair and came over to you.
He ran one hand through your loose strand of hair, and you let your face rest on his other hand. Closing your eyes with the feelings of comfort he brought you.
Surrendering completely.
You then realized that you had missed him. You've spent the last few days walking around the castle and getting bored of your own company. He usually tell stories about his adventures, which stole all your attention.
"My beautiful wife" he whispered.
You felt his fingers run through your loose hair. And you felt a shiver run from your head to your feet.
"Did you miss me?"
You opened your eyes, meeting his. A smile hovered over his perfect face, and you felt completely lightened by the feeling he brought.
"Please don't stay away so long" you said softly. He had become a friend, maybe more, but it was something that made you feel good.
"I promise, I already told my brother that I will stay with my lovely wife from now on" his icy hands now cupped your face, and he gently brought his nose closer to yours. Touching it.
Your mouths were almost touching, and your breath was getting heavier with every second he threatened to kiss you. As if asking for permission. When you whispered a yes, he attacked you with a kiss. You reciprocated the same, desperate, completely desperate for his every touch.
And he played it, anyway. He touched your hair, neck, waist, thighs, and arms. Every millimeter he ran his fingers through. While kissing passionately. To some extent you had to stop to catch your breath.
"Let's go to our room.." he said low, but it was almost like a question.
You knew what that meant, and it was just everything you wanted, ever since you did it after the wedding. Daemon had an incredible ability when it came to satisfying, and you felt it in your body. You've had orgasms at least four times. And you've been wishing for it ever since, even if you tried to convince yourself otherwise.
"Wait, I need to know, how many have you slept with until today " you took your hands off him, and walked away. You wanted to know.
"How many?" he looked surprised, almost offended by you question "I would never sleep with another woman"
"Don't need to lie Daemon, this seems absurd even to you"
"I'm not lying love" he approached again, and looked deep into your eyes "You were the last I was in bed with, and every time I satisfied myself, it was thinking of you. So just blame me for not being a good husband, and not satisfying you as you deserve"
You were out of breath. You didn't want to think about anything else now, even the question you asked seemed stupid. You actually thought it strange that you hadn't heard any rumors about Daemon being with harlots. But you didn't think that maybe it's because he hasn't actually been.
And he was really telling the truth.
"Tell me what you want" he whispered, his eyes still riveted on you.
"I want you Daemon, always wanted" you confessed.
"You always had me, my dear" he kissed you again, and when he stopped it was to kiss the rest of your face.
"And yes, I want to go to our room" a corner smile appeared on his face, and you already knew that the rest would be even better than on your wedding day.
_
I'm too lazy to write smut, and this is definitely going to be part two. I didn't proofread so sorry for any mistakes.
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sinon36 · 2 months
Text
Husband!Ghost x teacher!reader HC
As I lay in bed, it's 5 am. My alarm is supposed to ring at 7 am. Insomnia hits again. So here we go! Enjoy the product of my foggy brain!
Warnings: fluff, some mentions of torture, curse words, insomnia, nightmares, threats, stalking but it's good natured, some mistakes ( grammar and spelling), interact at your own discretion.
-
When you first met it happened in the nonstop supermarket at the intersection a couple blocks from his apartment. It was 3 am. You were looking for coloured paper, he was looking for Kentucky burbon.
Both of you couldn't sleep for very different reasons. He just got back from a long mission, unable to sleep in his own bed, his own apartment, not as familiar as the base, always bustling with activity. The house was too quiet. Ears straining to hear something. An understimulated brain makes up sounds, that turn to memories, then night terrors. He was out in search of relief, getting so drunk he'd pass out and get some shut-eye.
You on the other hand were finishing up on materials for your little students. And then you needed coloured paper to finish. You huff and puff, and almost curse out but refrain from doing so, looking at your wristwatch you determine you have a few hours until the school day begins. Do you trudge to the intersection, hopping, begging for mercy and coloured paper.
You were the only ones there besides the half-asleep cashier. Your sound of triumph at having found what you're looking for travels to the liquor aisle. Simon's eyes point in your direction, not really sure he actually heard it or hallucinated it.
At the register, you cut him off not even noticing his dark-clad 6'3 body, whiskey bottle in hand. He let out a 'bloody hell', an almost whisper, but your teacher's instinct kicked in. 'Language' you'd said in a chastised voice eyes darting to fix him with a glare, the same you'd do to the children in class. But instead of a meager 'apologies, miss' you get a grunt out of him. You glare some more and turn away, making a barely audible comment directed at him. Naturally, he confronted you on that and you went on and gave him a lecture on how people like him make your work 10 times harder and how they are a bad example to future generations.
Both him and the cashier look at you like you've grown two heads. Honestly, the young guy behind the cash register, thought you might start a fight with the graveyard shift regular wearing a balaclava and buying alcohol well into the hours of morning.
But you didn't. After having said what you had to say you turned around on your heels, slapped the two packets of coloured paper in front of the young man, and then angrily put the money in his outstretched hand. You left in a flurry of murmurs, not even acknowledging the farewell words.
'feisty' he had commented eyes trailing on your departing figure. He chuckled at your interaction. That day he drank himself into unconsciousness thinking of you, and your plush lips spewing insults in his face, eyes alight with passion, face scrunched in barely contained annoyance.
You were a primary school teacher, that much he has gathered from your discourse. He wanted to see you again, and walking around aimlessly he came across the nearest school in the neighborhood. He started searching for your face behind closed windows. He had found you and waited for you, like the stalker that he'd turned into. He hoped you wouldn't call the cops on him.
As you near the gates, two rows of 3rd-year students behind you, loudly talking about how much fun they had with you. You laughed at their happy and springy attitude. They were the best students you've had so far.
And then your eyes met brown ones in a staring match. You'd walked closer starting to threaten him to go before you got him removed from the premises. He smiled under his balaclava, eyes watching in admiration. 'let's grab dinner...' he interrupted you. 'huh?' that was the most articulate answer you could muster. 'I owe you a proper apology. So dinner on me.' He explained in chopped sentences the voice deep and laced with a Manchester accent.
You forgot what you were saying and blushed hard, a cute smile plastered to your face. You were so easily swooned by this stranger and his interest in you. He could have been a killer or kidnapper. You threw caution to the wind. You said yes.
And now, now you were happily married, a couple years into it, actually. The house you bought is small but cosy. The living room table is always full of clippings of coloured paper and half finished materials strewn about. It's home for Simon.
He knows you're busy with schoolwork when he's deployed, so he doesn't worry about you missing him too much. But you do, and he misses you tenfold. So you make something for him, a little couloured origami frame that contains a picture of the two of you, for him to have. He carries it in his chest pocket, but only on base, where he knows it's safe to do so. Being captured with personal things like this in his possession could give the enemy leverage over him. He knows that, he's an expert in interrogation techniques. But he doesn't tell you all this, he knows you're sensitive to violence. So he instead promises that he will keep it close to his heart, all the time. His lucky charm. You're enamoured with him and he basks in your love without shame.
To be continued...
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aysegust · 2 months
Text
MISUNDERSTOOD FEELINGS ( Mike Ross x Reader)
Pairings: Mike Ross x Reader Word Count: 3.767 Warnings: Little bit angst but fluff in the end. A/N: Well Hello everyone! I love watching Suits a lot but it was very disappointing to not see much fanfics about the infamous Mike Ross… Well, I wanted to write one, it may be not that well but I tried my best. English isn’t my first language but I hope you enjoy it!
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Last night, as you walked to the apartment you were living, the exhaustion was too intense to fighting back. Well, you worked too hard on a file with Mike Ross. He needed a hand of researching a file about one of Harvey’s super rich clients. Since you finished your work, it was okay for you to help Mike.
You found him quite interesting actually. Working crazy hours, trying to memorize everything, every rule, every clients needs; he was just doing it smoothly. One time, you got to experience it, Louis Litt was giving you a hard time about a case he gave you. Well, you never run away from a fight, so as he was pressuring you about reading thousands of pages and the due date was the day after, you were just feeling overwhelmed as fortunately, Mike Ross, the “genius puppy” came in to the library for rewriting a report, then he saw you.
Basically you were under the pile of papers as you looked like you were trying to survive for tomorrow. “Are you alive?” He jokingly said to you as you two were the only ones in the library at this hour of evening. “Well, Louis Litt gave me these files and he said,” You changed your voice as mimicking Louis, “Y/N, finish them all, I need it by the morning.” He smirked at the impression you made of Louis Litt. “He can be pain in the ass.” He whispered that.
“He’ll fire you if he hears that, careful.” He smiled. “I’m Mike, by the way, Mike Ross.” You looked at him as you smiled softly. “Well, Mike Ross, you have quite a reputation around here.” He furrowed his brows. “Can’t help it, I guess I am awesome?” *He smirked and sat in front of my chair. “You are cocky. Anyways, I’m Y/N L/N.” He looked at my eyes and smiled. “Do you need any help?” He offered gently.
For once, you hesitated to say something. Because it has always been like that. You do the job, you work too hard for it but right now, a help would be appreciated. You thought. “If you are not busy, any help would highly appreciated.” you looked at him with a wave of relief.
He turned a file to himself and began to read it with full focus. That night, you ordered a pizza and read, checked all the laws and other documents. He was indeed, brilliant. As he memorized everything just by reading it, you whined sadly.
But truly, he helped you sincerely and without him you wouldn’t probably sleep at least three hours. That night a friendship began to sprouted between the two of you.
As you remembered the sweet meeting you two had, a smile formed into your face and you tossed the keys on the counter and you walked hazily to the couch. Before you could get up and went to your bedroom, the sweet sleep took you surprisingly and you drifted off to sleep.
Yeah, the snoozed alarm rang again as she woke up and looked at her phone, you realized, it was 07.50 a.m. Well you were late and you overslept! Fuck, you sweared.
Since your apartment door wasn’t that complex and big, you hurriedly moved to your bedroom and changed your clothes to something else. Usual formal outfits. Then you went to the bathroom and washed your face, brushed your teeth. Fortunately you didn’t do an eye makeup yesterday so you didn’t struggle to clean your face.
After walking back to the living room, you took the files and put it on your pack. Then you are out. You walked so fast and sweared yourself to wear heels, then you called a cab, fortunately there was an empty one.
By the time Y/N arrived to the firm, the clock showed 09.00 a.m. Well, she was 10 minutes late to the meeting but she thought she would be later than that.
After she walked out from the elevator, she looked around and ran through the hallway. As she entered the conference room, she saw Harvey and other clients. Then she heard someone calling her name. “Y/N, where have you been?”
Mike said to you in a little bit worriedly. “I’m so sorry Mike, here, the files you were searching for. Well, I have found them but it was too late so I overslept, I’m so sorry.” He thanked you quickly then entered the conference room. You caught an eye from Harvey Specter himself. You felt terrible about it, after Mike went inside, you turned your way to the associate room.
You saw Donna, as you were walking past in the hallway. “You alright?” She asked you curiously. You looked at her a bit worriedly. “I am good, why?” She looked at you emphatically. “Well, you look a little bit messy.” you closed your eyes for a moment trying to not feel embarrassed. “I overslept unfortunately.” She smiled at that expression. “It’s okay, come with me.” She looked at you sweetly.
As you followed her down to the bathroom, you saw the state you were in. Your hair looked messy and your face looked a little bit bad. “Here, have my mascara. It’ll look good on you.” Donna offered you her mascara. It was a kind gesture so you appreciated. “Thank you, Donna.” You tamed your hair and then you put a mascara on your eyes and then you put a red lipstick on your lips. You didn’t understand why she was so nice to you actually. You were associate and she was Harvey’s secretary.
“Us, girls, stick to each other.” She replied softly. You looked at her as you smiled. She looked like a cool person you thought. “So, Y/N, how have you been?” She said. “I don’t know, Louis pushing me really hard these days… How are you doing with Harvey?” She smiled. “It is always usual, now that we have Mike…” She looked at you longly. “Well, he is a copy of Harvey, so double trouble for me.” As Donna said it you giggled. “He is nice.” You said abruptly. Donna raised a knowingly eyebrow. “Nice as what?” She said it curiously.
You looked at her carefully. “He is smart and helpful so…” You bubbled the words as Donna’s gaze was on you. “That doesn’t answer my question.” You looked at her. “What was the question again?” You said it smoothly. Acting like you haven’t heard her you ignored it. She smiled. “You are cute, I think we are gonna be friends.” Donna said. Then she continued.
“I think you should talk to him about your feelings.” You looked at her confusedly. “What?” You froze for a moment. “Well, I know you harboring a crush on Mike.” Now, you looked very embarrassed and also amazed by Donna. “How did you know?” She smiled. “I’m Donna, I know everything.” She looked at you confidently. But you waved her off.
“Sorry but that would be highly unprofessional. And I have a lot on my plate.” You waved her a goodbye and you left the bathroom.
As you entered the bullpen, you walked to your desk and started to work on some paperwork. After thirty minutes, you felt someone approaching to you. It was Mike. You looked up and saw him. “Hi, how was the meeting?” He looked at you. “Well, if you hadn’t show up with the files, we couldn’t able to got them.” I looked at him sorrowfully. “I’m sorry again Mike, for being late…” He looked at me sympathetically. “It’s alright, don’t worry.”
As he began to say something else, Louis came to our side. “Ladies, let’s lower the talk and get back to actually working.” I lowered my gaze, as Mike sent my way a wink, he walked to his desk,unfortunately, Louis called after him and asked his presence for his office.
Due to all the paperwork you were writing and the case you were dealing with, you didn’t realized it was around 08.00 p.m. You stretched your back and got up from the desk.
You got up and decided it was enough for today. When you took your purse and walked to the elevator, you thought about Donna’s words. It was bold of her to assuming it and actually commenting on it. Yes, she may be right about it but it was just a silly crush. Nothing worthy of giving the thought a shot.
So you stepped out from the elevator and as you walked away from the firm, you saw Mike, as he was talking with a woman, whose had a blonde hair. She was shorter than him, tinier. They were talking briefly and as your gaze never fell out from them, the next thing you saw surprised you.
That woman’s lips were on his lips in the next minute. As you saw it, you turned your head back and closed your eyes briefly. Oh, fuck. The tears… You felt the tears brimmed sharply in your eyes. As you were too stunned about the idea of having a silly crush, had affected you this badly. That it dwelled tears in your eyes.
You sighed and quickly walked away from the sight. Great. You went inside a cab hurriedly and by the time you arrived to your place, you felt horrible. How the hell he affected you like that? Also, how could you have not see the fact that he had a girlfriend? You thought all about it. As you lay down on your bed, these messy overthinking thoughts run all over your head.
The next morning when you woke up, you put on a navy blue dress. You brushed your hair and went to bathroom to do basics of routines. After you entered your bedroom, you quickly put some jewelry and took your coat and badge.
As you were leaving your place, you called a cab and went to the firm. It was just nothing’s new.
After you stepped into the elevator and walked to your desk, everything was same. Dull and boring.
Nothing’s new. Same paperworks, reviewing case files, contacting clients and do some shit for Louis Litt.
However, you saw Rachel Zane, stepping into the bullpen and with that charming smile of hers she welcomed you. “Hey, Y/N, how’s your day?” She said softly. “Racheel.” You empathized. “It’s same as always, what’s up?” You said it. Then she leaned on you. “Harvey’s expecting you in his office. There’s a case, he would like to see you.” You felt confused for a moment. “I’m not his associate, that’s weird.” Rachel smiled.
“I guess Louis doesn’t know about it.” As she said it, you got up and giggled about her comment. “I guess so.” You replied then walked to Harvey’s office. You knocked on his door softly. “You wanted to see me?” You said softly as you walked inside, Mike was also sitting.
You didn’t glance back at him, however, you could feel his curious eyes all over you. “Okay, L/N, well, Jessica gave me a pro bono case and she asked me to work two associates on it. Since you are pretty good at what you are doing, I’m gonna give it to you and Mike.”
Then you looked at Mike, briefly. As your eyes met, you changed your glance into Harvey ever so slightly. “Okay, sir.” You said firmly. Well, what a conundrum. Yesterday night you saw Mike with a woman, as they shared a kiss and now, you’ll work him on a case. A pro bono case.
When you left Harvey’s room and walked to your desk, you sweared you were going to explode. That meant you were going to spend the day with Mike Ross. The guy you had a silly crush but turns out he had a girlfriend. What a tragedy.
As you looked at the computer in front of you, you looked so off. Then Mike approached to you slowly. “Y/N, what’s up?” He asked as he looked confused. “Nothing, shall we look at the file?” You turned your head to him and looked at him briefly. He furrowed his eyebrows but he didn’t comment on your behavior change. “Okay, so there’s this man his name is Josh Morgan, he is claiming that his wife died because of moles in their apartment.” You looked disgusted and sad. “Ugh, that must be suck.”
He agreed on that. “Okay, so let’s go and talk to him.” You said.
-
After you two came back from the client’s apartment, Mike had to debrief Harvey so, he left you. As two hours passed and both of you were in the library, looking for any complaints about other residents in the apartment, you didn’t catch Mike’s gaze on you. “What do you think about?” He said softly. You didn’t look at him as you replied with a small voice. “Nothing,” You furrowed your brows. “Something’s bothering you.”
When he said that, you looked at him immediately. “What?” You replied fast. “Did something happened? You seemed off today.” He said sympathetically. You shrugged him off with a small gesture. “It’s fine, really. I was just tired.” Yes, you were tired but he shouldn’t have known the silly feelings you had and the heartbreak you felt.
He chuckled to himself. “If I hadn’t know you better, I would have said you are sad.” You looked at him as you raised an eyebrow. “It’s bold of you to assume that, Mike.” You said it nonchalantly. Then after looking back at the papers, he was about to open his mouth but you cut him. “Here, look!” You showed him a paper. “This was a complaint they wrote back 6 years ago from Mr. Morgan’s former tenant. It says, the house was molded when they were moved in but the landlord said nothing about it and he even covered up about it.”
You showed Mike the rest of the papers, as you two got up and walked away from the library, you two planned to pay a visit to the former tenants house. You two could find something with that.
As you called a cab and headed into the building of the former tenants, the road was silent.
Mike and you got off from the car, you walked side by side. After you payed a visit and finding out what happened, turns out there was more residents felt uncomfortable with mold and their health issues.
Doing another research about the case you two were dealing with, you and Mike found a way in the case, it could turn out to be a class action.
But first, you gotta do an undercover. Well, the situation you felt wasn’t help at all but pretending his wife for an undercover investigation, well, what bad could happen? At least that’s what you thought.
You two called the apartment’s owner and set up for a meeting about the house for rent. Mike and you arrived in front of the apartment. As you two saw the landlord and stepped inside the apartment, you felt a bit uncomfortable. Knowing that there were molds inside the house, it was disgusting.
“Yeah, just like we talked. My wife and I look for a new place to move in.” As he gently squeezed your hand, you pretended to smile. “So, I believe you two are in the right place. Our houses welcomes families into a big and warm place. Where you can feel safe and comfortable.” He said effortlessly. Bastard, you thought to yourself.
“No doubt, well, her mom begged me for a change actually.” Mike said it as he smiled. “She said she didn’t want to see her daughter anymore.” You laughed at that comment, well, you felt embarrassed and also wanted to kill the man next to you that gently placed his hand on your back as he was caressing it. It felt so natural, for you to lean on his touch however, you couldn’t lose your mind. So you turned back and looked at the mirror, while you were looking at the window, you saw the radiators side of the wall.
Mike and you left the place after you finished talking and observing the place. After you left the place, you felt bad. “Did you see the mold in the radiators wall, It was ugh.” You mumbled. He agreed with you.
After you two turned back to the firm, you sent Harvey to the files. Well, there was only thing left back is that, bringing this to the court.
You waited a day, and after preparing all the paperworks and other stuff, you were ready for the hearing.
-
After that successful court hearing, the apartment owner and landlords offered a settlement and with that, you two gave the terms of your settlement and with that both of the sides were agreed and it was a good day.
You and Mike did a good job. It was like you two synced incredibly well and even Jessica agreed on it in some way you didn’t knew. However, it didn’t help the situation you were in. After that night, pretending even a slightest of his wife, it made you feel like a wreck inside.
You wished it. You wished to be his, but it would never happen anyway…
After that day, Mike offered you to go out for dinner to celebrate the win but you decided to declined it unfortunately. You said to him that you weren’t feeling well maybe of mold but that wasn’t true in slightest bit. And Mike, he was a great observant.
Nothing’s new, you thought. With your feelings about Mike and that girl you saw before, you felt green. Which you hated that.
As the shift of yours ended, you went to your house. To sleep away and maybe drink something for a little celebration. When you entered your house, you changed your dress into some causal house-fit.
After ordering a pizza from your phone, what you didn’t expect was a doorbell ringing. As you got up and went to open the door, you weren’t expecting to see Mike Ross, standing in front of your door. “Mike…” You sound confused. “What are you doing here?” You were genuinely surprised.
“We need to talk.” He said it briefly. The look of determination and worry in his eyes made you feel guilty. “Come inside.” You said softly as you gestured him inside.
Mike came inside and you looked at him. “Why are you ignoring me?” He said. You closed your eyes for a second. “I’m not.” You tried to got away from it. “Yes you are. I don’t understand, why?” As you looked at his deep blues, you felt bad. He looked desperate and hurt. “Mike, it’a complicated okay?” You said it in a whisper.
“It doesn’t matter, I wanna hear it.” He said firmly. “Did I do something wrong?” You wanted to scream yes, however you stayed still. “You didn’t do anything wrong. It’s not about you.” You looked at him. “Then what is it?” He asked genuinely.
With hesitation, you looked at him. You felt the fear of rejection and you felt afraid of losing a friendship you two had. But you couldn’t deny it anymore. It hurt to think about it.
“Do you have a girlfriend?” You asked.
“What?” He sounded genuinely surprised. He wasn’t clearly expecting this question.
“I saw you with a girl, you two were kissing.” You said it coldly.
Ah, the look on his face as you said the words, he furrowed his brows for a moment. So it was true then, you thought.
“She isn’t my girlfriend. It’s not like that.” Now, you felt a bit angry and confused.
“What do you mean it’s not like that?” You said it bitterly. He approached to you slowly. “She is my friend-“ You cut his sentence. “So you kiss your friends like that, wow.” You said it sarcastically. He felt genuinely confused about your remark.
“Y/N, no, I-“ He paused. Then he looked at you deeply. Well with that moment you felt too anxious for your own good.
“I want you to ask something, and please be honest with me.” He said it as you felt your heart was beating very fast. “Are you in love with me?” He said like he was desperate for an answer.
You paused.
And that moment, whole of your body shivered and you felt scared. “What difference would that make if I say something?” You admitted as you lowered your gaze down. You didn’t recognized that he was approaching to you slowly.
“It would make a difference for me.” As he said it, you tilted your head up and looked at him. Now that seeing him so close to you, your cheeks blushed into a light red. “Mike, I can’t- I can’t say it.” You felt horrified, but, the way his hand caressed your cheek, you felt your legs went numb.
“She kissed me, and it meant nothing, nothing to me.” He said it with a whisper. He was looking directly into my eyes. “Because my heart is already belong to someone else but she’s too oblivious to see it.” As he said these words, your cheeks flushed more.
“And well, the woman I love is standing right in front of me but she is too afraid to admitting that she loves me too.” He smiled softly to you. When you heard his words, you closed your eyes for a minute. All of this felt like a dream, not reality.
But it was real; he was standing right there and he was indeed admitting his feelings for you. So you did an unexpected move and you kissed his lips.
As you kissed Mike’s lips, you have never felt alive like this before. Kissing his lips felt so safe, holding by him felt like as if you suddenly came home while running wildly from something else. The way your lips moved in a harmony, it felt too natural.
When you parted away, you looked at him softly. “I love you.” He grinned like a kid, as you said that three word.
Then he hugged you softly after you two shared another sweet kiss.
Well, you could’ve get used to kissing by him.
198 notes · View notes
djarinvibe · 5 months
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Oblivion (Javier Peña x F!Reader)
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A/N: crawling out of hibernation to post a javi p fic before disappearing again. Enjoy!
Summary: After a one night stand with Javier, you come to learn you are pregnant. Angst ensues
Words: 6k
Warnings: SMUT (MINORS DNI), public piv sex, oral (f!receiving), a lil angst, swears -- lmk if i missed anything <3
Italics = flashback // masterlist
The heat of Bogotá was starting to make you senile, even while sitting in the DEA office that’s loaded with fans to circulate the stale, hot air. The papers filled with valuable information you’ve been staring at were beginning to strain your eyes, the small lettering from the typewriter swirling across the page. 
You've been here for what felt like days, even though it's only been a handful of hours since you arrived this morning. The ashtray on your desk still emitted a thin line of smoke from the cigarette you had just snuffed out, and the coffee you brewed yourself a few hours ago had long gone cold from neglect.
Setting down the files in your grasp, your free hand rose up to your face, resting your head in your palm. Some days it felt like your job was impossible. No matter what you or your partners, Steve Murphy and Javier Peña did, Escobar always seemed to slink away just in the nick of time; even with the help of Carrillo and the search bloc.
It didn’t help that your mind was clouded by something else that happened just the night before. Something you never expected would happen since yours and Steve’s arrival to Colombia.
The two of you were both assigned to Escobar’s case and flew in together with Connie and their- now deceased- cat. However, you aren't from Miami like Steve is. You're actually from the west coast, Oregon to be exact. 
“Y’alright, Darlin’?” You heard Steve’s voice across the room, prompting you to lift your head. The blonde, lanky man stood leaning against the doorframe to your office with a steaming coffee and freshly lit cigarette in his grasp.
“Just… one of those days.” You murmured, giving the man a faux smile before sighing softly. 
“Are you going to tell Murphy?” Peña spoke after exhaling from a drag. He sat on the couch in his apartment, shirt off with his jeans still unbuttoned, staring down the bare skin of your back you had yet to clothe. 
You scoffed, shaking your head while pulling up your pants, “Absolutely not. This was a ‘one and done’ type of situation.” 
You slept with Javier on a whim; drunk, exhausted, and desperate to catch a quick release. Though after the two of you finished, it was a sobering experience to realize you had just fucked your coworker.
Since moving here and meeting him, you couldn’t deny that you’ve developed feelings over time; despite his reputation of sleeping around. Working long, late hours with him and Steve, you came to learn he isn’t as horrible as the gossips in the office seem to think he is. 
But even with that knowledge, you couldn’t let yourself get hurt. Not by him. Not when you have to face each other at work almost every day.
“It’s only noon.” Steve smirked, raising the mug in his grasp to take a sip of the coffee. 
“I had a long night.” You responded, eyes meeting your partners once again. You trusted Steve with your life. Being placed in dangerous, life threatening situations will make you feel that way about the people you experienced them with. But, you couldn't tell him that you and Javier slept together last night. 
Especially because Steve has been teasing the two of you about your evident chemistry for months now; both him and Connie whenever the four of you would get dinner or drinks. 
But you were firm on the idea that a relationship with him wasn’t going anywhere. Besides, as soon as Escobar was either jailed or dead, you'll most likely go your separate ways, returning to the home states you came from. And you couldn't let a relationship get in the way of your career.
You're still relatively young, having just turned thirty three months ago. You worked your ass off to be in the position you are now, a DEA agent, despite your field being mostly dominated by men. Misogynistic, dick-headed, men. 
And you certainly weren't going to let one of those men- Javier, to a lesser degree- get in your way. 
---
“I have to confess something,” You drunkenly slurred, looking at the woman seated on the couch next to you. Connie’s eyes widened as a mischievous, eager-for-gossip grin covered her face. 
The two of you had planned a girls night on one of your days off. Constantly working and being around testosterone all the time was frustrating, so any time spent with Connie was cherished. 
The two of you really became close on the flight from Miami to Colombia. Instead of flying out from Oregon, you first flew across the country and met Steve in Florida. After a few weeks preparing for your new assignment along with your new partner, you, Steve and Connie departed to Colombia.
“What?” She giggled, sipping the margarita in her grasp. 
“I slept with Peña, like two weeks ago.” You murmured, watching the woman's face twist into all sorts of emotions, mainly shocked.
“Really?” She finally found the words to speak.
“We got drunk and it just kind of happened,” You shrugged, taking a sip of your own drink. 
“Can I ask… How was it?” She giggled as she asked the question, a goofy grin crossing her face, cheeks heating up.
His rough hands grabbed at your ass as you rode him on the couch, skin slapping from how fast he was guiding you. You could feel every inch of his condom-covered cock fill you up, and only craved more as you feverishly rubbed your clit. 
Your eyes met his own amongst the pleasure, making your chest flutter from the intensity and passion. He was hungry for your body; the taste, the feel. It’s something he's been craving for months; watching you parade around in your tight skirts. Steve gave him shit about it constantly, clocking nearly immediately how much Javier took a liking to you, but he always brushed it off.
“God, cariño,” He groaned, watching your breasts bounce. You bit your lip as he wrapped his arms around your waist and lifted you up, switching positions so your back was now on the couch and he was standing. 
His cock plunged back into you immediately, causing you to call out his name, nails digging into his arms which had moved down as his hands grasped your hips. 
“Javi,” It was breathy and caused him to falter at how sexy his name sounded falling from your lips. He’s heard it a million times before, but not like this, not so needy and whiny.
It caused him to pick up his pace, watching your face twist with delight as he fucked you into the couch. Many women have been in this very spot, but you outstand them by far. Your pussy fit his throbbing cock like a glove, your breasts are the perfect shape and size for his hands and lips, your mouth did wonderful things as well. The blowjob you gave him before you fucked nearly made him bust like a damn teenager. 
“Oh, you're going to make me cum,” Your voice rasped out of your throat as your nails dug into his biceps. This would be the third time he's making you finish for the night, a personal record. You haven't had amazing partners in bed in the past. 
The familiar burn began to form in your lower belly, your nerves feeling as though they were electric. The man released his hand from your hip and moved it to your core, thumb quickly rubbing your clit in fast circles. 
“Cum for me, hermosa,” He grunted, feeling your pussy clench around his cock. The sensation caused his own orgasm to begin to rush up on him, prompting him to thrust faster. 
Your orgasm washed through your body as you moaned Javier’s name loudly, head tilted back into the couch cushions from the overwhelming sensation. You could feel the man's thrusts get sloppier until he too came, cock buried deep in your pussy with a groan, little whispers of praise leaving his lips.
“It was uh-” You paused, feeling your own face gaining heat at the memory, “Good. I'll tell you that.” 
“I'm so happy that this happened.” Connie gushed, leaning forwards in excitement, “Steve and I have had a bet going on for months. He owes me five bucks.” 
You shook your head and rolled your eyes, wanting her to relish in the excitement before you dropped the bombshell of reality onto the woman. As much as Connie and Steve- apparently- wanted this to happen, it just wasn't going to. You made that clear with Javier, now you'll have to do the same with them.
---
“Hey,” Javier’s low voice caught your attention, causing your stomach to drop. You’ve been avoiding him to the best of your abilities since that night seven weeks ago.
Not only because you slept together, but also because, just last night, you found out you were expecting. 
The light knock on your apartment door caused you to jump off of the couch and rush over, pulling open the entryway. Connie greeted you with a pitiful, yet encouraging grin. You could see the brown paper bag in her grasp as she slipped into your home, walking past you. 
“Do you really think it’s-” She began, walking until she stood in the living room while also handing you the bag. 
“Yes.” You cut her off, opening the paper bag to reveal two pregnancy tests. You felt your stomach churn at the sight and swallowed down the bile that threatened to come up.
“What did you tell Steve?” You asked, looking back up at the blonde before treading over to the bathroom. 
“He's not even home yet. Him and Javier had to go somewhere following a tip regarding Poison.” She shrugged her shoulders, sitting down on the couch. You chewed your lip, not only anxious for the result of the pregnancy tests, but now for your boys. You should be out there with them... but you're sick at home because of one.
You nodded even though she couldn't see and quietly stepped into the bathroom. It didn't take long for you to do what the instructions asked, anxious enough for the result. 
When you flipped the two tests over, revealing little pink pluses on each, bile immediately rose to your throat, causing you to rush over to the toilet and release the contents of your belly. 
Connie was quick to knock on the door before entering, rushing over to your figure and rubbing your back for comfort. Her eyes caught a glimpse of the tests, widening when she saw the evident positive on both, before looking back down at your sad figure. 
“Oh, honey,” She whispered softly as you raised your head, tears streaming down your cheeks hotly. She grabbed some toilet paper from nearby and gently patted them away, hand cupping your cheek.
“I just… didn't expect this.” You sniffled, shaking your head “We used protection, I-” You stopped and shook your head, a fresh set of tears streaming down your cheeks. 
You haven't exactly slept without anyone since Javier. Anytime you tried picking up someone at the bar after work, they just weren't the same. You couldn't even make it past a heated make out session before feeling the need to kick them out or leave.
“What's up?” You didn't dare look at him, your stomach still twisting. You kept your gaze at the manila file in your grasp, facing shelves full of boxes containing files.
“You alright?” He questioned, stepping further into the room, eyeing down your back. You swallowed, hearing his footsteps as they got closer to your figure. 
“I’m fine, why?” You furrowed your brow, finally raising your head and looking over your shoulder at the man. He could see the emotions you were so desperately trying to hide, making his own chest ache.
The truth is, the night you fucked had also been stuck on his mind. And the obvious avoidance you've shown has been messing with his head. He understood nothing more was to come from that night in his apartment, but he didn't expect you to be so cold; even at work. 
When he walks into a room, you leave it. And if you're sitting at your desks, you always make an excuse to go work in the conference room. Not just that, but you also won't even look at him half the time, and only address Steve when the three of you are standing together. 
“No reason.” Javier shook his head, “Murphy just wanted to know if you found the file?” He quickly changed the subject. 
“Oh, uh, yeah. I just found it,” You began, finding the confidence to turn around and meet his gaze, “Was just reading through to make sure it was the right one.” You noticed how close he’d stepped into the small room; nearly trapping you against the wall of files. It made your heart race and emotions run amuck. 
This is why you had been avoiding him.
Early pregnancy symptoms have been kicking your ass. And having Javier there to rub your back when you felt cramps, or hold your hair back when you were nauseous hanging over the toilet, was something you craved.
“We should get back to Steve then.” The man commented. You nodded, eyes averting from his face to his chest. The shirt he was wearing had been unbuttoned dangerously low, making your cheeks fill with heat. You no longer had to imagine what his bare chest looked like, as you've already gotten to see it. 
“Is there something on my shirt?” Javier's voice broke you from your memory, and you felt your face gain heat rapidly. 
“No.” You quickly stuttered out, shaking your head, and pushing past him to get out of the corner he had trapped you in.
---
By sixteen weeks, your pants wouldn't button anymore, and your bump was getting less easy to hide. You had to switch to baggier blouses and stretch pants. Luckily, having male work partners, they haven't noticed your changing body yet.
It came as a surprise because you've since quit smoking, drinking, and caffeinated coffee. 
Connie has been keeping your secret well. You begged her not to tell Steve until you were ready, to which she agreed. She understood you needed time to figure everything out. Being a single, pregnant woman is mostly frowned upon this day in age. Not that you care about that bullshit, but you don't particularly enjoy being the center of attention. 
You also need to figure out if and when you are going to tell Javier. Deep down, you know you should. And if you end up getting sent back to the states because everyone found out, then that's fine as well.
Your plan was to stay and help as much as you could, until near the end of your pregnancy. When it reaches that time, you'll take maternity leave combined with your vacation days, and fly back home. After your baby is born… you don't really know what you're going to do.
A knock on your apartment door caught your attention, and you stood up, brows furrowing. It was late, close to midnight. You had gotten off work a short amount of hours ago, but weren't expecting any visitors. 
You reached into your purse and pulled out your gun, making sure it was loaded before slowly treading to the front door. Looking through the peephole, your stomach dropped as to who stood in the hallway. 
Unarming your pistol, you placed it back onto your purse before returning over to the door and opening it. 
“Javier?” You had seen him at work earlier, but his sudden appearance at your apartment, blocks away from his own, was a shock. 
Despite trying your best to ignore him earlier in your pregnancy, you eventually learned to push your feelings about everything to the back burner and only talk shop. No personal life was discussed, only work.
“I need to talk to you.” He spoke, brown eyes boring into your own. You felt your stomach drop, nodding as you stepped aside and allowed him in. You could smell the alcohol on his breath as soon as he walked by you, heading towards the couch. 
“What's up?” You questioned, pulling your robe tighter around your body while watching him sit. You had gotten out of the shower only twenty minutes ago, and hadn't bothered to get clothed yet, save for a bra and underwear. 
“I need to ask you about the coordinates to Escobar's current hideout.” He spoke, pulling out a pack of cigarettes from his front pocket.
“Oh, um, please don't smoke in here.” You commented, swallowing heavily. The man gave you a quizzical look, tucking the cigarettes back into his pocket. 
“Are you quitting or something?” He questioned.
“Something like that.” You spoke, sitting on the opposite end of the couch, “So, what questions do you have?” 
“Carillo and the Search Bloc are going to drop into Escobar’s tomorrow morning. I'm having my informant confirm the coordinates once more, you should have yours do the same.” Javier answered, looking you down. 
Seeing you there sitting in your robe, fresh out of the shower caused his heart to pick up and cock come to attention. Your cleavage had popped out, the robe slightly splitting open at the top when you sat down. He couldn't help but notice that your breasts seemed larger. Your legs were also deliciously exposed, and looked so soft. 
The man just wanted to feel your skin; squish the meat of your thighs, kiss the gorgeous crevice where your legs meet your torso.
“I’ll get a hold of them.” You nodded towards him, “You came all this way just for that?” You then questioned.
The man muttered something about tapped phone lines- which you suspected was a lie- before asking if you had any liquor.
 With a nod, you stood up and walked over to your kitchen, pulling a bottle of whiskey out the cabinet. You then poured him a glass before carrying both the freshly poured liquor and the bottle back over to the couch, placing them down in front of his figure.
Truthfully, you miss both drinking and smoking. But the health of your baby is more important than the poison you use to ease your mind. 
Sitting back down, you watched the man take a hefty gulp before refilling his glass. You bit your lip, playing with the hem of your robe as the two of you sat there in silence. You were unsure of what to say, wanting to avoid everything besides work. 
Your inner voice was suggesting otherwise, fighting for you to tell him the news. You know it isn't fair to keep it a secret, as he at least deserves to know that he’s going to be a father- Not that he has to stay and help raise the kid.
You have fully come to terms with the fact that you're going to be a single mom, raising the baby on your own.
“Javier…” You began, playing with your fingers. The man turned his gaze, searching your face, questioning as to what you're going to say. You took his silence as your signal to continue on, “Do you remember when we slept together four months ago?” 
“How could I forget,” The man spoke, a smug expression crossing his face as he took a sip of his drink. 
You rolled your eyes at his comment before taking a deep breath, “Uh, well. I-I think the condom broke.” 
The man's cheerful expression quickly dropped into a serious one as he set the glass harshly down onto the table, standing up, “Are you sure?” 
“Yeah, I'm sure.” You frowned in return, standing up as well and untying the robe to expose the small bump of your belly. You watched the man's eyes drop to your mostly naked body. He first stopped at your breasts, admiring how enticing they looked tucked in your bra, before trailing down to your stomach. He could see the shadow the bump caused, sending his heart into his throat. 
“I found out at seven weeks. My period was late.” You broke the silence, retying your robe. “I admit I didn't know how to tell you- If I was even going to in the first place. But, I'm getting to a point where I can't hide it anymore. And…” You paused, swallowing, “You deserve to know.” 
Javier only stared you down, resting his hands on his hips, “And you haven't slept with other guys?” 
“No, I haven't slept with other men.” You felt hurt by his question even though it was reasonable. The two of you don't have a claim over the other, “I-I tried after our night together and… couldn't. I know that you're the father.” You brought your hand down to your bump. Your baby was still small, only being sixteen weeks along, but you have grown to love the thing with your whole heart. 
“Look, I-I need time to think about this.” Javier muttered, shaking his head. You felt your heart begin to race at his comment, even though you'd already prepared yourself for heartbreak.
The man doesn't want to be tied down, he proved that by walking out on his wedding with Lorraine all those years ago, and the various women he circulates through in a week. You should've expected his rejection.
“I don't expect you to be a part of this.” You quickly spoke, trying to reassure him- and yourself, “I fully am ready to do it on my own. I have been since I found out. I won't tell anyone it's yours.” 
He stared at you before nodding silently. This is certainly not what he expected when he came to your apartment this evening; he had different intentions. He missed you. He missed your body and the way you taste. The hookers and informants he's been fucking the last four months have been like dirt compared to you. 
But now knowing that you were carrying his kid? It all felt so overwhelming. 
“I-It’s probably best if you go…” You spoke so quietly, wrapping your robe tighter around your body, his silence beginning to make your heart race.
“Hermosa-” Javier began, but you saw him hesitate to speak. He only nodded and turned on his heel before stepping over to the door and leaving swiftly. 
The moment Javier left your apartment, you couldn't stop the tears from spilling down your cheeks. You felt overwhelmed, sliding down the back of your front door after he had shut it, hands covering your face.
You felt guilty for kicking him out, and even regret it a little. Even though he told you he needed time, he looked so upset when you told him to leave. And what was he going to say just before exiting? Why did he stop himself?
You cried on the floor for god knows how long before making your way to your land-line, which sat on the side table next to the couch. You needed a friend- Connie- who usually made you feel better about the situation you're in.
The phone dial rang two times before someone answered. When you blubbered a somber greeting, you immediately recognized that Steve had answered when he questioned if you were alright. 
“Steve,” You bit your lip, trying to swallow down the lump in your throat, “Can I speak to Connie?” 
“She’s asleep,” His southern accent spoke loudly through your receiver, “Are you sure you're fine?” 
you sighed heavily at his question, silent tears streaming down your face as you sat on the couch. You figured now would be the time to break the news. He’s become a close friend since meeting in Miami; both him and his wife. 
“Steve, I have something to tell you.” You began with a sniffle, “I-I’m pregnant…”
Your partner was silent for several moments before he finally spoke, “Jesus. Does Connie know?”
“Yes. She helped me find out, actually.” You wiped your eyes before taking a deep breath, trying to calm down your emotions. The distraction of Steve was helping, along with lifting a heavy weight off of your shoulder. But Javier still lingered on your mind; his displeased face haunting the back of your eyes every time you blinked. 
“Why didn't you tell me earlier? Does Peña know too?” Steve then questioned, causing your heart to wrench. A new lump formed and a fresh set of tears began to fill your eyes, spilling down your cheeks.
“Javier knows,” Your voice cracked as you spoke, “He’s the father.”
“Oh,” The blonde's deep voice came across quiet through the receiver of your telephone, “I’m so sorry.”
--- 
Bullets ricocheted across the surrounding brick walls, nearly hitting you as you quickly jumped behind a barrier. You could hear your partner yelling in Spanish from the rooftops, as he had taken a separate route, while you quickly hid from the gunfire. 
Streams of silent curses left your lips, brick dust and chunks flying throughout the air from bullets. You could feel your heart beating against your chest, adrenaline pumping hotly, as you held your pistol in hand.
The gunfire finally stopped a handful of seconds later, but it was soon followed by the sound of a car peeling away down the street, causing you to peek over the wall. La Quica and Poison were gone and the street was empty due to the gunfire. 
“Shit,” You cursed just as your partner approached the brick wall you hid behind. 
“What the fuck were you doing?” Javier’s angry voice caused you to roll your eyes, reholstering your pistol before facing him.
“What?” You furrowed your brow in anger.
“You could've gotten hurt. You're not even wearin’ a fuckin’ vest.” He continued on, gesturing to the blouse donning your top. You merely stood and listened as he ranted. He never used to be this protective over you. Not even after you slept together and before you found out about your pregnancy. 
“Why the fuck did you chase them?”
“We could've had them if you hadn't taken the roof!” You yelled back, arm raising as you harshly poked him in the chest. 
Javier Immediately clenched his jaw, eyes narrowing towards your figure. You know he wanted to snap back vile words in return, but kept his composure. He couldn't bring himself to, not when you're pregnant, especially with his kid. He already made you draw the short straw, he didn’t need to cut it even smaller.
“Get your ass into the jeep.” He spoke through grit teeth, choosing to abandon the argument all together. You scoffed, kindling his temper even further. He needs a cigarette as soon as the two of you get back to the office.
-
“Peña told me about Poison and La Quica.” Steve’s southern drawl caused you to lift your head from staring at some paperwork.
“Did he also tell you about how he was a dumbass-”
“You need to get your head out of your ass, agent.” The blonde man spoke deadpan, cutting off whatever you were about to spew. He didn’t care, all he knew was that Javier had smoked four cigarettes in the span of an hour after you had gotten back. He finally confronted the man as to why the two of you were acting so off after your outing.
“Javier was scared. Though he may not act like it, he’s terrified of losing you- and the baby.” The man whispered the last part, knowing you haven’t told the rest of the office yet, “He admitted it to me just before I came to confront you. ”
You felt your heart clench, quickly averting your gaze from Steve, “I-I didn’t realize.”
“Peña may not have been the best choice to… procreate with. But, you’ve gotta throw him a bone.” Your partner mumbled softly, catching your attention once again.
“I’ll talk to him.” You swallowed with a nod, standing up from your desk.
-
“I’m sorry.” You immediately spoke once Javier had settled back at his desk. The man spent hours doing some meaningless task in the file room; most likely just to avoid you. “I haven’t been taking your feelings into account. I just… assumed you didn’t care.”
“I figured that was what you wanted.” Javier simply answered, eyes meeting your own. He leaned in his desk chair, arm draping over the backrest. 
“No-” You quickly yelped, feeling your face gather heat, “I mean…Can we talk in the conference room?” You then whispered, suddenly so aware of your coworkers and how silent the office seemed. Nobody's eyes were on you and Peña, but you could tell they had purposely stilled their movements to hear better. 
The man only gave you a simple nod, gesturing for you to lead the way. 
Once the two of you had made it to the conference room, you quickly closed the door and blinds on the window-filled wall. The sensation of Javier's eyes on your back urged you to turn around. 
“First, I want to apologize for acting like such an ass out in the field. I'm used to only having to worry about myself, and I wasn't thinking about…” You trailed off, hand hovering over your belly, “I should've been vested. And followed you onto the roof.” You added, finally making eye contact with the man. 
He sat leaning against the conference table, arms folded which caused his biceps to bulge deliciously. You know if you weren't pregnant, he'd have a lit cigarette between his lips. 
“I want to apologize too. I shouldn’t have acted out. I-” He cut himself off, standing up straight now, “I care about you, and the kid.” He gestured to your belly, glancing down. You had the bump hidden quite well under a flowy blouse, but even just knowing it was there caused his heart to pick up speed.
Unable to stop the smile from growing across your cheeks, you dropped your head shyly. He had spoken such simple words, but they meant everything to you. Never did you expect for him to say he was sorry, as well as admit emotion. It almost made you hopeful- but you quickly had to shut down that feeling, not wanting to get disappointed or hurt. You know that nothing is going to come from this. Javier is nothing more than your baby’s father. He’s probably just apologizing to keep you happy.
You then cleared your throat and met his gaze once more, having properly discouraged yourself, “So, are we good?” 
“Yes.” He murmured.
You gave him one last nod before turning on your heel, approaching the door. Standing alone with him was beginning to feel overwhelming.
“Wait,” Javier interrupted your exit, grasping your bicep and pulling you back over to him. His other hand cupped your jaw in the process, pulling your gaze up to match his as his lips met your own with fervor.
Melting into the kiss, your arms grasped onto his shirt, pulling your chests taught. His arms snaked around your waist, lifting you up from your ass and quickling placing you onto the conference table just behind your bodies. Wrapping your legs around his figure, your hands moved up to the back of his neck, tangling your fingers into his hair.
“God,” Javier groaned against your lips, hands fishing under your blouse. Your body reacted delightfully to his touch, only yearning for more. 
“Missed you,” You mumbled. Javier unhooked your bra and pulled it away from your chest, quickly cupping your breasts as soon as they hung freely. He could feel how swollen and full they’d gotten, only causing his mouth to water.
Javier then growled, fingers twisting your nipple softly, “I need to fuck you,” 
His statement caused your pussy to throb, but you quickly pushed him away, “Not in the office.”
“Why not?” He frowned, head twisting in question as he stepped backwards towards the door, locking it, “Just need to be quiet.”
 Biting your lip, your morals fought a losing battle as the man began unbuttoning his top and slowly stepping towards your seated figure. He returned to the same position he was before, securing your legs around his waist once more. He then guided your arms up, taking off your blouse, allowing your bra to fall off in the process.
You heard him softly groan at the sight of your breasts before he leaned over, lips meeting the delicate skin of your nipple, sucking and biting tenderly. Tossing your head back in pleasure, you felt as the man began to grind his hips into your own, hard cock pressing up uncomfortably against his tight jeans.
Reaching down, you rubbed him through the denim, causing him to falter in his movements, “Christ, hermosa,”
Finding the hem of your pants, the man slipped his hand in past your underwear feeling the full bush of your pussy before his fingertips met your clit. Accidentally moaning at the sensation, Javier quickly put his hand up to your mouth, covering it gently. Your arousal only caused his cock to throb harder. 
Unzipping his jeans, he freed himself and gave his dick a few pumps, grumbling lowly, “Gonna fuck you,”  
“Please,” You pleaded against his other hand, which was still covering your mouth. 
Lifting your ass up off of the table momentarily, the man slid your pants and underwear down, exposing your pussy for him to enjoy. Mouth watering at the sight, he dropped to his knees, quickly dipping his tongue deep into your core. Biting your lip to repress the sounds of pleasure you wanted to spew, your lower belly grew hot with pleasure as Javier sucked your clit harshly and slid two fingers in.
“Oh- God, Javi-” You whimpered, one of your hands lifting from the table and tangling into his hair. You could hardly see him over your pregnant belly, making the reach a little difficult. The man hummed against your pussy, pleased with how well you were responding to him. Recalling the last time you had sex, your bodies naturally seemed to understand each other perfectly; and it seems it’s happening this time as well.
With his tongue working expertly against your clit, your pussy clenched around his fingers. He could feel that you were getting close to coming, and picked up his pace in combination with sucking your little bundle of nerves more harshly. 
“Cum for me, cariño.” You heard Javier growl, just before you couldn’t take it anymore and felt your orgasm wash through your entire body.
The man wasted no time licking you clean before standing back up, quickly plunging his cock deep into heat. His hand covered your mouth once more, silencing the yelp of pleasure that was leaving your lips. Thrusting his hips, the man fucked you roughly on the conference table, causing it to shake with the movements. You could feel every inch as he did so, only adding to your pleasure.
Balancing your weight onto one hand, you moved the other down to your clit and rubbed feverishly, throwing your head back in pleasure. Clenching around the man's cock at the sensation, he groaned softly, faltering his thrusts slightly before continuing.
“Fuck you feel so fucking tight. If you weren’t already pregnant, I’d do it again.” He grumbled as one of his hands rested on your belly, helping move your body to the rhythm of his thrusts, “Your pussy feels that good.”
Your second orgasm caught you by surprise, the man's words luring you there quickly. Javier’s own orgasm followed closely behind, your cunt clenching around his cock, milking him thoroughly. His head tossed back in pleasure, continuing to thrust lazily until you both became too sensitive at the feeling.
“Fuck,” Javier cursed while tucking himself back into his jeans, still breathing heavily. His button-down remained open, deliciously showing off his gleaming, sweat covered chest. You paused at the sight, biting your lip, before slipping off the table and collecting yourself as well.
“We should get back to work,” You murmured, embarrassment slowly setting in, now realizing you just fucked Javier in a very inappropriate place. Anyone could’ve knocked on the door or windows; and what if it happened to be Steve or the Ambassador?
Instead of responding vocally, Javier only nodded, eyeing your frame up and down as he buttoned his shirt back up.
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ahonice · 1 year
Text
lucky; pt.2
part one
luke hughes x fem reader
word count: 8.4k
warnings: cursing, drinking, implications of sex/sexual jokes & situations, slight hate towards business majors, probably definitely incorrect knowledge about pre med shit.
note: since so many people asked for a part two (literally only fifteen but still) i finally got over the grudge i have against series/part twos and i'm here to relieve you all. this is the opposite of planned out, i am writing this as i go along so i hope it doesn’t suck too badly (actually scared no one will like this because of how much love part one got). anyways enjoy, leave feedback, have a great day, love y’all babes <3
italics are flashbacks
+++
you and luke didn’t arrive back at the house until past midnight. neither of you expected anyone to be awake when you entered through the front door, but the sound of multiple voices proved that theory to be wrong.
“i think my brother’s friends got here a little earlier than we anticipated.” luke told you as he opened the door, going unnoticed by the small crowd in the living room. “let’s just get to my room and go to sleep, we need some rest.” you nodded at luke’s words as he moved himself behind you and wrapped his arms around your waist, you knew he was subconsciously attempting to protect you from the group of guys, more specifically his brothers.
we didn’t make it far though, only a few moments later a voice called out at luke, causing everyone else to focus their attention on us. sighing, luke let go of you and moved forward to greet everybody, muttering an apology as he passed by you. 
you stood there awkwardly, trying to decide if you should wait for luke to finish with his tiny game of catch up or if you should just go up into his room and wait for him there. after what happened today luke asked his mother if the two of you could stay in the same room today, she agreed after a little bit of begging on luke’s behalf. before you could make your own decision the room’s attention was no longer on luke.
“who is the girl luke?” 
your head shot up at the mention of you, instantly becoming a bit self conscious because of the number of eyes on you. you made eye contact with quinn for a split second before tears started to build up again, seeing him just reminded you of everything that you had been through in the past twenty four hours.
“that’s my girlfriend, y/n.” luke said, making his way back to your side and attempting to block you from the eyes that were visibly making you uncomfortable. “-and if you don’t mind we would like to get to bed, it’s been a long day. you can all be properly introduced in the morning.” without letting anybody else get a word in, he turned around and guided you up to his room with his hands around your waist.
+++
you woke relatively early, the sun was just beginning to rise so you took this as your opportunity to go outside and spend some time on your own, you needed it. it took a little bit to get luke’s death grip on you loose enough for you to wiggle out of bed, but after you were successfully free you grabbed one of his hoodies to throw on over your pjs and pulled your hair out of your face with a claw clip. 
you silently made your way out of the house and took a seat out on the dock, taking a quick picture of the view as the sky turned shades of pink and orange. you dipped your feet into the water before grabbing your journal, deciding it was best to write your feelings down on paper just for your better understanding of everything that has happened.
as you finished up your journal entry you noticed the sun was now peaking over the tree line, you took a picture of the view, as well as a picture of your legs with your feet in the water and the pink journal in your lap. you opened up instagram and put all the pictures you took this morning and posted them to your private instagram account, captioning it “yesterday was one of the worst days of my life, can only hope today and each day after will be better.” 
you spent a few more minutes in silence, enjoying the fresh air you were getting. your trance was broken by the sound of footsteps on the dock.
“hey dear, what are you doing up so early?” you turned around to look at the man speaking.
“hi jim.” you smiled as he sat down next to you. “i’m just spending some time outside. i felt like i needed some fresh air.” 
jim nodded before speaking, “i’m sorry about everything. i had no idea any of this was going on, and i am sorry that i didn’t pick up on it earlier.” 
“it’s okay, don’t feel bad for not noticing it earlier. i should’ve spoken up when it first started happening.” you told him, giving him a reassuring smile. 
“would you like to join me and ellen today? we’re just running some errands but it could be fun, help you escape the sausage party that has become the lake house.” jim offered, causing you to laugh at his use of the phrase “sausage party”.
“yeah i would love to.”
+++
you had gotten ready for the day without waking up your boyfriend, so you decided to continue to let him sleep. you went to your room and began packing your bags because you would be leaving in two days and you needed to begin getting ready for your departure back home. once the room was all sorted and looked like nobody was staying in it, you put your luggage back into the closet and made your way downstairs, cleaning had always been a way for you to relieve stress. 
“sorry to keep you guys waiting, i wanted to clean up my room.” you told ellen and jim as you made your way downstairs.
“no need for apologies sweetie, let’s go. our first stop is breakfast.” 
+++
you had gone to breakfast with luke’s parents and told them about your plans for after college.
“right now i’m planning on becoming a medical examiner.” you explained as you waited for your orders. “i just have to see if i made it into the pre-med program before i can begin properly planning my future.” ellen and jim nodded, and continued to ask some questions about how your first year of university was going and other school related topics. 
+++
after breakfast they took you to the local farmers/flea market, you were excited as you had been meaning to ask luke to come along with you. as you were browsing your options you saw a couple booths near each other with fabric for sale, you quickly made your way over and began looking at what was all there. after a few moments you found the colors you were looking for. 
you purchased your rolls of cloth as well as some embroidery floss in an assortment of colors because you had been meaning to stock up on it and some yarn for one of your experiments. after getting everything you made your way back towards ellen and jim, telling them what you got. 
the next stop was the grocery store, with jack’s friends arriving early the house wasn’t stocked up for everybody staying over. during your morning with luke’s parents the topic of what happened the day before didn’t come up until your last stop of the day. 
you were looking around a local garden shop, looking for a new plant to bring home, when ellen came up to you.
“i just want to apologize again for what happened yesterday. i am beyond embarrassed for how my sons have been treating you. you mean a lot to me, jim, and luke, and after the talk i had with them yesterday i’m hoping jack and quinn will come around as well.” you smiled at ellen, a couple tears were brought to surface when she said that you meant a lot to her. 
once you and luke were gone ellen walked up to her oldest sons and they immediately knew what was coming.
“mom, please don’t-”
“no quinn! i am going to.” she sighed, “y/n means so much to luke, and for you guys to be so rude and disrespectful towards her is unacceptable. has she ever done anything to make you guys feel that way? or were these assumptions completely based on snap judgements?” ellen took her son’s silence as an answer. “y/n is good for luke, i’ve never seen him happier. he loves her enough to introduce us and allow us to spend time with her, and this is how you pay him back? you two need to figure out a way to fix this, i suggest you start with opening up the presents that y/n spent hours making for you two that you guys never had the common decency to be appreciative about, i think you’ll like what they are.” after giving them one more look of disappointment she walked back into the house to find jim and explain to him what was going on.
“i think they want to open up the gifts you made, but i never got to properly ask because their friends showed up.” you smiled at her. them opening up the gifts wasn’t going to fix everything, ellen knew this, but it was a start. 
+++
it was only eleven when you returned back to the lake house, with how late everybody stayed up last night you didn’t expect anyone to awake yet, you were wrong. ellen and jim had some more places to go but didn’t want to take up your whole day so they dropped you back off at the house before continuing their list of things to do. when you got up to the front porch you heard the voices of multiple people, one being your boyfriend, and they were all yelling.
“this is all your guys’ fault! my girlfriend left because of you two and how you’ve been treating her.” you heard luke shout. you quickly realized you never informed luke of your last minute plans with his parents, you kind of expected ellen to send a message to him or to any of the boys to explain her and jim’s absence when they woke up. 
“luke calm the fuck down. her car is still out front, she obviously didn’t leave.” jack’s voice was heard as you tried to open the front door, of course it was fucking locked. 
“her luggage is gone, her room is spotless, it looks like nobody has stayed in it for weeks.” luke voice was breaking. you quickly knocked, more pounded, on the door needing someone to let you in. shortly after your began hitting the door it was opened, you didn’t recognize who it was so you knew it had to be one of quinn or jack’s guests.
“found her.”
you pushed past him and made your way to the living room where everyone was at, dropping your bags and wrapping luke into a hug. he noticeably relaxed under your touch, he grabbed onto you like his life depended on it and you heard muffled sobs against your neck where his face was buried into.
“i thought you left me.” he said, you were the only one that heard it he was that quiet. 
“i’m so sorry luke, i–” you were going to explain what happened but you were cut off before you could continue.
“where the hell did you go?” you weren’t expecting that question, especially from who it came from. jack looked at you, anticipating your answer. you stood shocked, the genuine worry in his tone was enough to throw you off balance and leave you unable to speak. your silence seemed to just agitate him. “luke was worried sick. i get that you’re upset with me and with quinn, i do, we have been treating you horribly, but pulling this shit, causing us all to worry for you and your safety, just to get back at us is not okay.” 
you felt bad, until he said that. “jack i didn’t run away as a form of revenge, i didn’t even run away, i went out with your parents. they thought i could use a break from everything going on here, and they were right.” you detached yourself from luke, your heart cracking a little bit when he whimpered at the loss of touch, and went to grab your bags from earlier. once they were in your hands again you walked up the stairs, grabbing Luke's wrist in the process. “i don’t owe either of you assholes any further explanations.”
+++
“i thought you left me because of how my brothers were treating you.” once you and luke made it into his room he broke down again, causing the guilt in you to bubble up.
“i’m so sorry baby, i would never leave you. your dad invited me to spend the morning with him and your mom and i thought it would be good to spend some time away from the house.” you said, rubbing his back as you sat in his lap, chest to chest.
after a few more minutes and a couple more apologies luke stopped crying, his sadness replaced with a slight amount of anger.
“don’t you ever do that again. i am your boyfriend, you are my guest in this house, i don’t want this to come off as insanely possessive, but i have a right to know where you are.” you could only nod at his words.
“i’m sorry luke, it didn’t even cross my mind. i wrongly assumed your mom would tell you, or that you would still be sleeping by the time i got back.”
“hey i’m not that lazy.” his joking nature allowed you to further calm down, you both got what you needed to off our chests.
“i can’t believe i called your brothers assholes.” you groaned, knowing that would probably make them dislike you even more.
“they deserved it.” luke said, giving you a kiss right after. “anyways, it was hot.” 
“oh really?” you giggled, a blush forming on your cheeks as his hands began wandering.
“it’s a good thing i locked the door when we walked in.”
+++
it wasn’t for a couple more hours that you and luke went back downstairs, he thought it was time that you were actually introduced to the guests that joined you at the house.
“y/n this is trevor, cole, and alex, guys this is my girlfriend. y/n.” you smiled at them and said a faint hello, they all smiled back except for one. it was the one who asked luke who i was last night and opened the door for me earlier, the one who was now identified as trevor. he quickly went up to me and hugged me, taking me by surprise, i hesitantly brought my arms around him and gave him a slight pat on the back.
“it’s nice to finally meet you, i’ve heard many different things about you but i can already tell most of them were full of shit.” you smiled, knowing exactly what he was referring to. “well we were all planning on going out on the lake for a bit, eat dinner, watch the sunset, you two in?” you and luke both nodded before heading back upstairs to get ready.
+++
the tension on the boat was very evident, you felt bad for the three boys who probably had no idea what had happened just a day before, you’d probably feel even worse if they did know.
luke was quick to gain your attention, talking to you about the most random things. you kept up with his conversation before you noticed that jack and his friends were huddled up and whispering on the other side of the boat, you wouldn’t have been bothered if it weren’t for them constantly looking up at you before going back to their gossip session. you began to feel a little self conscious, you made an effort to cover yourself as much as you could with the one towel you could find near you. luke noticed the shift in your focus.
“is everything okay? you seem distracted, i’m sorry if you didn’t want to be near them so soon.”
“no luke it’s fine, i just feel like they’re talking about me.” you tried to subtly motion towards jack and his friends. luke just glared at them, seeing what you were seeing.
“here come sit on my lap, i’ll wrap my arms around you and protect you from them.” you giggled at his joking tone.
“anything to touch me huh hughes?” you poked at him once you were in his lap.
+++
dinner was served, an assortment of caprisuns and beers as well as uncrustables were on the menu for tonight. you moved up to grab some for you and luke when you got into a conversation with cole.
“so how long have you and luke been together?” 
“ten months, our one year is in september.” you smiled, already excited for whatever the two of you would have planned for that night. 
soon you were whisked away into a conversation, more like interrogation, about your relationship. trevor and cole sat next to you while jack, alex, and quinn sat in front of you. the oldest hughes put your boyfriend on wheel duty so he was on the other side of the boat, shooting you a worried glance each time you made eye contact with him. 
“how did you meet?”
“we were in the same orientation group, we got paired together for this water balloon game.” you smiled at the memory, remembering how horrible luke was at simply catching the balloon.
“what are you studying?” quinn’s question caught you off guard, seemingly since for the past ten minutes all you’ve been asked about was his brother.
“i’m currently hoping to go pre-med, i will find out if i made it into the program in the next couple days hopefully.” you told him with a smile.
“so you wanna be a nurse or something?” trevor asked.
“no. if i wanted to be a nurse i would be in the nursing program.” you told him, taking a sip of the beer you were holding before continuing. “i’m planning on being a medical examiner, conducting autopsies, figuring out the time and cause of death of a person.” you could tell the topic of dead bodies made your small q/a crowd uncomfortable which caused you to giggle. “any more questions? or can i return to my boyfriend now?” the boys just shook their heads in response, so you got up and sat on luke’s lap.
“so how did that go? you don’t seem too tense anymore.” luke asked once you were both situated.
“it went decent, i think, they just asked about us the whole time.” he nodded at your answer. “-oh, but quinn did ask me a question about myself and just myself, nothing that had to do with you.” luke looked over at his oldest brother with a small smile, who returned it before you, unknowingly, interrupted the moment by asking luke to take some pictures of you.
+++
you spent the night in luke’s room again, the boys needed a room to stay in anyways, so you had convinced ellen and jim that staying with luke for two nights wasn’t the worst thing in the world.
“i don’t want you to leave.” luke said quietly, stealing your attention away from the tv screen.
“i don’t want to leave.” you replied, shifting to face him.
“then don’t. i can guarantee my parents wouldn’t have any problems with you staying for another week or two.” 
“luke i can’t, my sewing machine and all my other clothing stuff is back at my house and i’ve honestly gone a little insane just going five days without it–” luke rolled his eyes at your reasoning, giving you a look of disbelief.
“seriously, a machine is the reason you don’t wanna spend more time with your boyfriend?”
“-also i get my pre-med acceptance letter soon, if i get in, and i want to be with my parent’s when that happens and i know that they’re gonna want to celebrate with a party.”
“i think if you want to get closer to my brothers, or at least have them get to know you, you should stay here an extra week or two. they mean just as much to me as you do and i’m not saying you need to be best friends with them, but it would be nice if you guys got to know each other more and spend more time together.”
silence, and eventually sleep, consumed the two of you. both knowing an argument would only start if you continued to talk about it.
+++
you woke up in an empty bed, frowning you got up and looked around the room to see if he was at least still in his bedroom, he wasn’t. you got up and began getting ready, throwing a pink bikini and some jean shorts before braiding your hair.
once you were downstairs your boyfriend was still nowhere to be found, you made your way outside where you saw his brothers and friends, luke was not with them.
“hey guys, do you know where luke is?” you asked the group, hoping one of them had an answer for you.
“he left like two hours ago, didn’t mention where he was going though.” jack answered, you nodded. “if you would like to join us, we were planning on going wakesurfing today, i don’t want you getting bored in the house by yourself.” you smiled at his offer and accepted, telling the group to give you a few minutes so you could grab some things for the boat, sending luke a text on your way back into the house.
to: luke <3
hey, where are you?
to: luke <3
i’m going on the boat with your brothers and friends so wish me luck lol
you packed your bag and joined the boys outside who were already on the boat waiting for you.
+++
an hour later you still hadn’t received a response from luke and you were getting worried.
to: luke <3
are you okay?
to: luke <3
i find it funny that yesterday when i did this exact thing you said you had a right to know where i was at all times, do i not have that right either? 
“y/n do you wanna try it?” my attention was drawn away from my phone to look at cole.
“sure, i don’t know what i’m doing though.” you replied, moving to take off your shorts and put on the life vest.
“didn’t do it before we got here?” alex asked.
“no, i had other things distracting me.” i glanced over at quinn who gave me an embarrassed smile before speaking.
“i’m sorry for that, i really am, it was uncalled for.” you just nodded in response, not really wanting to talk about it in front of everybody.
+++
you sucked at wakesurfing. you were able to keep your balance for thirty seconds at most before you slipped, or the one time trevor tackled you into the water. which of course was filmed and posted onto trevor’s story, the embarrassing scream you had let out was now viewable to his thousands of followers
once you guys got off the boat you quickly made your way inside to see if luke had shown up yet, he still hadn’t. you quickly opened your phone to call him but got no response, now you were mad. you two had talked about the importance of communication and the risks of not knowing where the other was yesterday, and here he was doing the opposite of everything he asked of you yesterday. 
to: luke <3
idk what the hell you’re doing right now but it has now been six hours since i’ve woken up and you’re still nowhere to be found and no one has heard from you. 
to: luke <3
i’m going to dinner with your brothers, so wish me luck, and if i don’t hear back from you by the time it’s dark i will send in a missing persons report.
to: luke <3
just lmk you’re safe.
you weren’t planning on leaving for dinner for a couple more hours so you spent some time getting the proper measurements for some clothes you would be working on, as well as studying up on how to knit a sweater since you would be trying that for the first time when you went back home. 
you didn’t change for dinner, just throwing one of luke’s michigan shirts on top of your swimsuit and putting your shorts back on. soon you made your way downstairs where it was just quinn waiting, everyone else apparently still getting ready. when you saw it was just him you quickly tried to make a run for it and go back to your room.
“you know you don’t have to avoid me, i think it’s about time we talked anyways.” quinn’s voice stopped you from going up the stairs. you wanted to keep walking away, you really did, but you knew you needed to have the discussion. you made your way back into the living room and sat on the couch seat furthest away from quinn. 
“ok let’s talk.” you started once you sat down. “can you tell me why you did what you did?” 
you got straight to the point, not wanting to spare any time. 
“i was just looking out for my little brother, i didn’t know you.”
“-you still don’t know me. the only information you know about me is my name and that i’m an aspiring pre-med student at michigan.” you interrupted quinn, earning a glare in your direction.
“yes. i still don’t know you, but i’m hoping that in the next two weeks that you’re staying here i can get to know you.” he finished speaking with a sigh, like it almost pained him to say those words. 
“wait what? i’m leaving tomorrow to go home, i’m not staying for an extra two weeks.” you were confused, your parents were expecting you home in the next twenty four hours.
“luke told me this morning that there was a change of plans and that you were going to be staying an extra two weeks.” quinn said, equally as confused. “did you not know this?”
you could only shake your head as an answer while you pulled your phone out to text luke.
to: luke <3
i don’t know if you were trying to surprise me with an extra two weeks at the lake house but i told you i couldn’t do that, my parents wont allow it.
from: luke <3
*image*
i’m with your parents right now, they said it’s okay. i’m at dinner with them though so i’ll talk to you later, but please wait to yell at me until i’m back at the lake house tonight. i’m gonna hit the road soon.
“that little shit.” you muttered, making quinn laugh.
“what did he do?”
“he has been ignoring my texts and calls all day, which is a problem on its own especially because of what happened yesterday, and now he is at dinner with my parents five hours away in my hometown convincing them to let me stay here longer than what was planned.”
“you don’t want to stay here longer? is it because of me and jack? because i meant what i said on the boat, i really am sorry. no matter what the circumstances were, i took it too far. i’m shocked it took you so long to call us assholes.” quinn’s last comment makes you laugh.
“i’m not gonna lie, you two are partially why i want to leave, but also because i know that next week more of your guys’ friends will be here and that ellen and jim are leaving, i just don’t want to intrude.” quinn nodded at your reasons.
“well if you do stay i think it would be a good time for me to properly get to know you, i would say that we could just start over and forget everything that happened…” he trailed off waiting for an answer from you.
“-not a chance. what you, and jack, did was not okay. i forgive, but i don’t forget.” before quinn could say anything in response the rest of the boys came downstairs and we all headed out to the cars to go to dinner.
+++
dinner was another interrogation, but this time it was almost all questions about you.
“so what do you do for fun?” that can be a loaded question, alex asked you it in hopes to be able to spark more conversations about things that might tie to your answers.
“well i like to design and create clothing, or add things to a boring sweatshirt from the thrift. i do lots of upcycling with things i find at goodwill.” you answered, not knowing how they would respond.
“do you have any pictures of things you have made in the past?” cole asked this time, you nodded and got out your phone. showing them some pullovers you had embroidered things onto, the swimsuits you had made from scratch for you and luke, the apron and hand towels that were gifted to ellen, as well as the ties and matching pocket squares that you made for the hughes boys.
“oh that’s the set you made for my dad.” jack said before pausing, noticing the embroidered initials and numbers on the ties next to the one his father owned. “were those our gifts?” he had gotten so quiet you were shocked you were able to hear it.
“yeah they were, still are if you want them, luke told me the colors of your teams and i went from there to make them.” you told jack before looking at quinn who had a matching look as his brothers.
“can’t believe you ever made gifts for them after how they had treated you.” trevor’s joke made you wince, it seems like they don’t know the full story. 
“well i didn’t do it to get on their good side, i did it just because i thought this would be something they would enjoy, something personal to wear before games or at events, and creating things for people is something i really enjoy.” you kept your head down while talking, not wanting anyone to see the emotion in your face. the waitress soon brought everyone’s food out, you thanked anything and everything that lived up above as something was there to distract everybody for the time being.
+++
once back from dinner you went to hangout by the docks and watch the sunset, the boys had dropped you off per your request because you desperately needed some alone time. after the sun had fully set and you were pleased with the photos you had taken, you decided to go for a swim, stripping off your shirt and shorts, shivering as the cold breeze of the night came over you. you didn’t give yourself time to rethink your actions and jumped into the lake, you were freezing but it felt good. the cold being exactly what you needed.
you don’t know how long you were out there before you heard the sliding door open.
“babe are you out here?” luke’s voice brought immense comfort over you, it felt like it had been days since you’d last seen him. slowly swimming towards the steps you made yourself known.
“yes” you shouted, stepping out of the water and onto the dock. luke quickly made his way towards you, stopping once he was at the end of the dock and could see what you were wearing.
“you look really hot in that swimsuit.” you blushed at his compliment, and at the way his eyes were raking over your body. “you shouldn’t be able to look this hot babe.”
“oh really?” you said stepping closer to him, looking at his lower half to see if he had anything in his pockets, he didn’t. “well, we should do something about that then.” you reached out to grab his shoulders and turn him around, leaning in for a kiss, but before your lips could touch you shoved him into the water. “that’s what you get for ignoring me all day.” 
you jumped into the water a few moments later, luke’s shocked face making you laugh harder. 
“what the hell y/n.” luke asked once the shock from the cold died down in him.
“it seemed like you needed some cooling down, also you spent the whole day ignoring me and then went behind my back to get me to stay an extra two weeks.” you replied, swimming up closer to him, wrapping your arms around his neck.
“i have a surprise for you when we get back inside to make up for it.” luke’s arms instinctively wrapped around your waist. 
you stayed like that for quite some time, luke filling you in on his day and vice versa.
“so quinn apologized to you and said he wanted to get to know you during the rest of your stay?” you nodded at his question, making luke’s smile grow wider than it already was. “that is so great y/n.”
as you were about to add something to what luke had said the sound of footsteps made you close your mouth.
“yeah mom they’re out here.” jack yelled back in the direction of the house. “you two are in trouble, get inside.” 
+++
“so luke, do you see you and y/n lasting? like once you start in the NHL?” 
you weren’t sure when you fell asleep, but you knew that you had woken up while luke’s brothers were grilling him about our relationship. you didn’t open your eyes, you knew it was wrong to eavesdrop, but they should know the risks of talking loudly while someone sleeps a few inches away from them.
“i do see us lasting, for a long time. i know you guys might think this is premature but i can see myself spending the rest of my life with her.” luke’s words made your heart rate pick up, “i want her to come to new jersey, but after she has completed all her schooling. i can’t ask her to give up her education for me, it means too much to her.” 
“but if she goes pre-med she will have a lot more years of school, it’s an extra four years and usually more. could you wait about ten years for her? is she worth it?”
“y/n is absolutely worth it, i don’t care how long it takes for her to finish school she is it for me.” tears had started to well up in your eyes, you couldn’t pretend to be asleep anymore. 
you shot up from your spot on the couch and tackled luke in a hug, you had never doubted luke’s commitment for you, but to hear him say it, especially to people who aren’t the biggest fan of you meant a lot.
“i love you luke.” you whispered, a few tears spilling out. 
“i love you too baby.” 
you both missed the look his brothers gave each other, a look that said “maybe she isn’t so bad”
+++
 you didn’t make it into the pre-med program. your parents had opened the letter with you over facetime, you were crushed. yes you could apply next year, and every year after that until you got accepted, but you didn’t want to do that, you wanted to get into the program after one try and that didn’t happen. 
luke was there for you, he held you while you cried, comforted you when trevor accidentally got you a congratulations balloon thinking you were accepted, and stayed with you during the days even though you knew he wanted to spend time with people that weren’t you.
one day you did force him to go out on the lake, dylan and mackie had arrived that morning and you know he wanted to hang out with them, even though he told you he was happy to spend the day with you. you spent a lot of the day cleaning, with ellen gone the house started to look like only teenage boys were staying there. once you were done with that you made lunch and headed back upstairs to finish your next task. after plenty of talks with your parents, and a few emails with your advisor, you decided to change your major to business. all your life you’d been making clothes, you thought you might just make a career out of it because you enjoy doing it so much. you hadn’t told anyone other than your parents, you were scared to. you didn’t want anyone, more specifically luke, to think you were giving up on becoming a medical examiner just because you got one rejection letter. and you did what you did best when you were anxious about something, you made clothes and cleaned. when luke went back to your hometown last week he grabbed your storage tote full of all the essentials, your sewing machine, the brand new embroidery machine your parents bought you to celebrate completing your first year of university, and way too many fabrics. while you’ve been bunkered up in luke’s room, not wanting to face the world just yet you’ve made lots of items. ties for jim, a sweater for ellen, another bathing suit for luke, and today you were determined to make matching shirts for you and luke. you started with making basic white tee, you could’ve easily bought them but there is no fun in that, and then you decided to do a heat transfer of the design you picked out.
they were gonna be gag gifts, every year one of the frats hosts a “twin” party where you and your date show up in matching outfits and this year you and luke were going together. your shirt would say “i 🩷 my boyfriend” with an image of the two of you on the back, and his would be the exact same but with girlfriend instead of boyfriend. the creation of the shirts didn’t take as long as you thought it would, so now you were looking for more things to do, you weren’t able to make a decision as luke’s door was opened by jack. 
“hey me and quinn are going to get ice cream, would you like to come?” you accepted their offer, knowing that you needed to get out of the house. 
it didn’t hit you that this would be the first time you would be alone with luke’s brothers, ever. sure you had your conversation with quinn the other night, but now that jack was here it made you just as fearful, a bit more even.
+++
“so what did you do today? i know that luke went out with dylan and mackie, we haven’t been seeing you much.” jack said once you all sat down for ice cream.
“well i assume you guys heard that i did not make it into the pre-med program so i’ve just been in a small slump lately–” you were cut off by quinn.
“we actually didn’t know, but that makes sense why trevor felt so guilty about the balloon he got you.” 
“yeah, but today i actually switched my major. i’m gonna study business now, possibly entrepreneurship, i decided to pursue a career more based on starting my own clothing company.” you told the boys, who glanced at each other.
“well that is amazing, congratulations. have you told luke yet?” jack asked, beating quinn to speaking.
“no, you guys are actually the first people i’ve told, trying to avoid others thinking i’m giving up on pre-med.” the boys nodded at your reasoning, quinn decided to fill the silence this time.
“luke told us he brought up your clothing stuff, have you made anything?”
“yeah, i’ve made a couple ties, some shirts, a sweater, and a swimsuit.” you laughed at their shocked faces. “i’ve had a lot of free time since i haven’t been leaving the house.”
+++
it had now been five days since you switched your major and you still hadn’t told luke, even if you wanted to tell him you probably wouldn’t have the time to since he has been with dylan, mackie, and the couple other michigan players that have arrived at the house. this is one of the reasons why you didn’t want to stay any longer than a week, you knew luke was going to become distant when his friends showed up.
waking up to an empty bed became normal, luke and the other boys would do some training in the mornings. so like you did yesterday, and the day before, and the day before, you got up and made your way downstairs to make breakfast. quickly distracted by the mess that had been made from what you assumed were smoothies or homemade protein shakes. you silently cursed whoever made the mess while you cleaned it up, then moving on to do some laundry. towels and swimsuits had been piling up in a very overfilled basket and you knew none of the boys were gonna do it. once the load was in you moved on to tidy up the living room, folding blankets, fluffing pillows, vacuuming. 
“stress cleaning?” you whipped your head around to see jack sitting on top of a freshly fluffed pillow and unfolding a blanket.
“no, why would you think that?” you said, while walking over to get him off of the loveseat to make it presentable again.
“because you still haven’t told luke about switching majors and the more you hold off the worse you think he is going to react.” jack stated, “also, you just kicked me out of my seat to do whatever the hell that is.” pointing to you as he sat down on the floor.
you scoffed and stopped karate chopping the throw pillow once it looked nice enough. “you don’t know what you’re talking about.” 
 “just tell him y/n, i’m serious. he is only going to be more hurt the longer you take to tell him, and you don’t wanna hurt my brother, i’ve just started to like you.” he smirked when you glared at him.
“haha very funny jack.” 
“what’s got you so scared to tell him anyways?” jack asked in a much softer tone of voice, patting the spot on the carpet next to him. 
you sat before sighing. “i don’t want him to think i’m giving up on something just because of one small hardship. all the time i hear him bragging to his teammates and friends about how his girlfriend is super smart and is gonna be the best doctor for the dead in the world one day, i’m scared to disappoint him.” you felt a couple tears in your eyes before you continued to speak. “i’ve seen him researching med schools near newark, one’s that have the best program for medical examiners. he believes in me, he knows i could do this even if i don’t, and i don’t want him to think i’m dumbing myself down to a bachelors in the most basic study field ever.” by the end of your small rant the tears had begun falling, they weren’t sobs but they were there.
“y/n, luke loves you so much. you getting a four year degree in business is not going to change that, yes he is your number one supporter when it comes to you becoming a medical examiner, but that doesn’t mean he won’t be your number one supporter when it comes to you being a fashion designer, or whatever it is you want to do i’m a little confused.” you laughed as jack continued. “do you know how much shit me and the guys have given him for some of the things he wears, we don’t even call him luke anymore he is just “simp” to us now, but he doesn’t care about that, he cares about you and your happiness, and if getting made fun of for wearing matching swimsuits with you or wearing a hat with your initials on it means making you happy, he is going to do it. he will be there for you no matter what because he loves you, and i can see why he does. you’re an amazing person y/n, and i’m so sorry for how i have been treating you over the past ten months. i know that sorrys aren’t enough to make up for what we did to you, but i hope it can be a start to us becoming friends because i need more people to bother luke with me.” you smiled and pulled jack into a hug, thanking him for the apology and kind words as well as forgiving him.
“one more thing, did he really refer to you as a future doctor for the dead?” jack asked, laughing a little.
“yes, it was so funny.” 
+++
you and jack decided to watch a movie while you waited for luke to come back from training, quinn soon joined you two on the floor after he had woken up. it was nice, there was no awkward tension, no glares being thrown in your direction, you felt like you were all getting along for the first time and that made you smile.
“um why are you all on the floor?” dylan’s voice cut the peacefulness that had come over the three of you, all three of you quickly looked away from the tv to see the boys all back from training. you made eye contact with luke who was looking at you with a shocked, but very happy, expression. you just smiled and gave him two thumbs up, before turning towards jack and quinn to excuse yourself. you made your way to luke and gave him a kiss and grabbed his hand to take him upstairs, but not before telling jack to switch the laundry loads for you.
+++
once you were in luke’s room he began asking you questions about what he had just walked in on.
“well i was stress cleaning and jack walked in on me doing it and somehow got me to tell him about all my problems, if hockey doesn’t work out for him you should tell him to join the counseling field, but after i went a mini rant about what i’ve been fixated on lately he apologized and we talked everything out and i think we are officially on good terms.” you said in one breath, smiling as luke wrapped you up in a hug.
“what about quinn? is everything okay between you two?” you nodded and explained that you had talked it out with him a couple days ago. 
+++
you and luke started getting ready for the dinner party that the hughes brothers were invited to and you were going as luke’s plus one, you didn’t fully understand what it was for but all you knew was that it was a semi-formal event, making it the perfect opportunity to have luke wear the tie you made him a few days prior, the one that matched your soft pink dress. 
as you were doing your makeup luke spoke up again, going back to your conversation from before.
“wait babe, you said that you were stress cleaning. what are you stressed about?” luke asked, walking into the bathroom and leaning against the counter. you looked at him through the mirror and continued applying mascara as you told him.
“about a week ago, after i got the rejection letter, i switched my major to business and entrepreneurship, to pursue a career in fashion. i didn’t tell you because i was nervous on how you would react, and the longer i kept it from you the more stressed out i got. i’m sorry i didn’t tell you sooner, i know how excited you were to be dating a genius and now i’ve let you down.” you looked at his face to see his reaction, but his face wasn’t telling you anything. 
silence took over the bathroom as luke tried to find the right words to say.
“you could never let me down y/n, yes i am a little upset that it took you so long to tell me, but i understand why you did it. i am proud of you and everything you have accomplished so far. so med school isn’t for you? you are going to kick ass in the fashion industry babe, they won’t know what hit them.” he smiled at you before wrapping his arms around your waist and placing his head on your shoulder. “i love you y/n, never doubt that.” 
“i love you too luke.” 
+++
you and luke sat in the living room waiting for his brothers to come downstairs, you began to get a little antsy as you feared you would be late if you didn’t leave in the next five minutes.
“would you two hurry up! y/n is pacing back and forth cursing you guys for making us late.” luke yelled up to his brothers, who quickly made their way downstairs.
“sorry we weren’t sure how to tie these ties.” quinn said once they were both at the bottom of the steps.
you looked up at them and instantly began smiling. “you’re wearing them.”
jack and quinn looked at you, both with huge grins on their faces, before pulling you into a hug. they were wearing the ties you had made them for the holidays, nearly a year ago. 
“we love our gifts.” and “better late than never” were said but you weren’t sure who said which.
you quickly called for luke to stand with his brother so you could take a photo of the three of them. 
“you better post that on your main y/n, show the world you have the coolest future brother in-laws ever.” jack shouted as he raced luke for shotgun. 
you don’t know how you got so lucky.
+++
note: OMG it’s done. this was a bit hard to write because the whole time i was horrified it would flop or people wouldn’t like it, and i’m still horrified lols (the ending is so rushed i don't like it). anyways i hope you enjoyed, feedback is so greatly appreciated. it lets me know what i’m doing that people like and what i could be changing about my writing. just hoping this one does number like lucky did. have a great day, love y’all babes <3!!
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vulpixisananimal · 11 days
Text
(You wake up.)
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(How long were you asleep? You were asleep so long you were dreaming. You were having a nightmare, more like. You were wandering around Dormont, and no matter what you'd say, everyone else would stay to The Script. Even when you saw yourself at the favor tree, all you would do is say the same stupid lines.)
(You shudder. Never again, please, never again.)
(You look to your side, someone had placed a heaping plate of food on your nightstand. Your stomache growled, so you decided to grab a bite. A quesadilla again, naturally. It was mostly cold now. That would put you at least an hour, maybe two behind schedule. It sounded busy outside, so maybe closer to midday?)
(What WAS your schedule?)
(Wake up, be sick, bump into isabeau, breakfast, explain over breakfast, clean up, prep for the day, go out and do whatever. Ramos came around at about. . . Three hours past noon. Stars, you had to plan.)
(You start to eat as you get up; your body lodging formal and VERY vocal complaints against moving. Stars, you were so hungry, you already finished your first quesadilla and needed another. And you still needed to get dressed!)
(It took a few minutes, but you were up, fed, and ready. Looking yourself over in the small mirror in your rented room, you looked. . . Looked like normal. Looked like him. Looked like you? Maybe.)
(Who were you, Loop? Who were you now? Just the friendly star? Is that all?)
(Ha. hahahhaha.)
(Curse you, Universe.)
(You head downstairs.)
". . . Hellooooo?" (Huh. There wasn't anyone around. They must have headed out or. . . Wait.)
(That noise you heared. It sounded familiar actually. You walk over to the door to the front yard and pull it open.)
(!!!!)
(Mirabelle, Bonnie, Nille, Isabeau, and Odile were all there going over battling! It looks like Isa was pretending to be a big ol scary sadness, it was, surprisngly similar to the house! You knew the script by heart too! Next Bonnie would say-)
"IF WE DO A COMBO, AND HAVE FIVE OF THE SAME SYMBOL, WE DO A 'JACKPOT SKILL!!!"'
"Exactly, Boniface. And see? We already have a combo of two right there."
(Ah right, because you weren't there to give that third hit.)
"When we get five of the same symbol, whether Rock, Paper, or Scissors, we'll be able to use a Jackpot Skill. . ."
"Only Rock, Paper, and Scissors attacks count for the Jackpot, by the way. We should be careful with how we use those skills, but we can use any other type of skill or item without breaking the combo."
"Yeah!! A combo will beat me!! Please, do a combo!"
(Hehe, because he's being a big ol sadness and not "knocked out.")
"You heared the man. Let's add three more scissors symbols to our lineup, shall we?"
(. . . Heh. Hehehehehehehe.)
(If you were going to be stuck in Stardusts little body, you will have some fun.)
"Of course M'dame!" (You say as you run past them all straight as Isabeau, leaping at him while he's still surprised. You both tumble back into the grass. You make a scissors symbol, and poke him on the nose with it.)
"!!!?!?!??!?!??!??!!?"
(Oh he looks so confused. And maybe blushing a little? Oh silly Loop~ You look over your shoulder to the rest of your companions with a cheeky smile.)
". . .Oops~"
"'HEY!!!" (Bonnie stomped the ground angry.) "CRABFACE!!! WE HAD THE MEANIE HANDLED!!!"
"L-language." (Nille was barely holding in a laugh, probably at seeing such a big guy like Isa being boddied by a twig like you.) "Good morning to you too."
(Odile chuckled and shook her head.) "Defeated in one blow. Truly, you are leagues ahead of us oh wise one."
"I was worried we were going to die, oh how strong it was!" (Mira continues.) "Bested by someone who should still be resting up!!!"
(Wuhoh.)
"A-ah, I'm doing fine! S-see?" (You say, getting off of Isabeau and sitting on the grass.) "No issue whatsoever~"
"incredible, absolutely incredible." (Odile says, she and the rest coming over.) "You're somehow a worse liar than Siffrin."
"Wh-" (You choke on your words.)
"Do they look paler than normal?" (Nille teased.) "What do you think Bonbon?"
"They look like white paint!!!"
"H-hey guys be nice!" (Isabeau FINALLY sat up.) "Loop just woke up, after all."
"Aww thank you Isabeau~" (You stretch. Huh, Loop, it was kind of nice to be known, honestly.) "And what have you all been up to since I passed out."
"Quite a bit!" (Mirabelle said, shaking her hands excitedly) "Madame Odile had an idea about your looping! And we decided to try and making easier! A-and-"
"Alright 'Bella, how about we get inside first." (Nille says, picking up her hammer.) "Gotta say, y'all really do have the whole battling thing down much better than I do."
"Oh don't worry Nille!" (Isabeau gets up.) "We were traveling for a whole year! We had lots of practice!"
"But until you catch up try to stick back with Boniface." (Odile adds.)
"Maybe I should be telling all you that~" (You joke, standing up.) "But really, I am feeling much better."
"Good! Now, to buisness-" (Odile leads you all back inside.)
(Your allies had been busy during your nap. They had gathered all the trinkets and supplies you'd gathered. You didn't bring all the eqipment you found in the house with you, and you didn't have nearly as much tonics, but it wasn't nothing. Paper mache gauntlets, Wok, etc.)
(They went over basic battling, and brushed up on their crafts. Nille had a solid place in battle too now. She had a nack for countering hits, so she'd stay to the side untill an opritunity showed itself and she'd jump in.)
(They were. . . Thinking about you?)
"-as the theory goes, anyway." (Odile had just finished explaining her theory on sleeping and looping.) "I do hope it's true, it would make everything so much easier."
"And if it does work!" (Mira says, excited.) "In the future just come out and say which loop it is! Everyone talked it out and well, i-it'll be easier to help you!"
"That's. . ." (It was, it was a lot to take in.) "That's really thoughtful."
"I didn't want you to have to do this alone." (Isa is smiling at you.) "We didn't, so, we perpared for you!"
"It was pretty fun, actually." (Nille is leaning back.) "Change, like I was finally getting to join my little sibling on fighting the bad guy."
"Yeah!!! And this time we're doing it as a big family!!!" (Bonbon, they're giving you the biggest smile.)
(You, you don't know how to respond.)
"I know this probably wont be the last loop, so we wont remember, but, that's ok!" (Isabeau. . .) "Because, Loop, I know every other me is going to try just as hard to help you!"
"Me too!"
"Mine as well."
"Same here!"
"YEAH!!!"
(Oh stars.)
(O-oh stars, it's, it's all too much. You're starting to cry. You're crying. It's, it's like when you first met them, so kind, and, a-and, and they're treating you like, like-)
"U-UH!!" (Isabeau holds up his hands seeing you cry.) "D-did I do something wrong?!?"
(You shake your head.)
"I think it's all a bit overwhelming. Besides, we were practicaly strangers in Dormont." (Odile rightly points out.)
"Doesn't matter!!" (Bonbon runs over to your side.) "Hey, hey, look at me."
(You look up at Bonnie, they're waving their hands-)
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"You've been helping 'Frin out, and you helped us out too! We're not strangers anymore!"
"Hear hear."
"Alright! Group hug time!"
(O-oh stars, oh starsohstarsoh-)
(You're crying more, they're, they're so nice, they're being so nice. They're. . .)
(They're treating you as you. As Your own person. As a part of Siffrin but, as yourself as well. You're YOU. They know you're you!)
(You're cry even more now.)
"T-th, thank you guys. . ."
(You all stay a second more there, in a big old hug. They don't know who you really are, but they know you're Loop, and Loop needs help. And, they love you, even after all this time, they still love you. . .)
(. . .)
(Eventually, it has to end, and everyone gets back to their seats and you take a few deep breaths. In, and out.)
"Got a plan today then, Loop?" (Mira asks.)
"Well, a few~"
107 notes · View notes
delfiore · 11 months
Text
—A SUMMER’S TALE.
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pairing: vada cavell x reader
synopsis: the summer before college, vada joins mia's family on vacation in france and falls in love with the scenery, and a charismatic lifeguard.
word count: 9.6k
warnings: talk of the shooting
a/n: it's summer so you know my cmbyn flare ups are happening. i’ve been writing this for a few weeks now and i’m super pumped it’s done. pls let me now what you like, what you don’t like about this! i’d really appreciate some feedback!! and i’m sorry if i can’t reply to you if you comment on this as this acc is a secondary blog
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The villa had one feature that stood out in particular—a hallway that ran through the base of the house, connecting the kitchen to the open grass area in the back. Even the tiniest gust of wind could collect into a large breeze to combat the sticky heat of the day.
Vada closed her eyes and lifted her arms by her side as she felt the breeze glide through her. She could smell an earthy, hay-like smell of flowers that had been bathing in sunlight wafting in from the garden behind the villa. It didn’t take much to notice; summer in southern France was in full swing.
I could live here, she thought. Four weeks of this? Away from the repetitive scenery of the American suburbs, away from expectations. Only a few minutes since she’s gotten off the car and seen the yellow walls and red bricks of the Mediterranean villa, and she’s been buzzing ever since. She’s never actually left the country before, and the long flight over was jarring, to say the least. But the beauty of what she saw as soon as she landed made up for it.
Mia had instructed her to come along upstairs to put her things away; Vada would be occupying the guest room next to hers. She swore her friendship with Mia Reed started because they both went through a traumatic thing together, but it was moments like these when she was grateful for the perks.
“I could use a nap,” Mia said, rubbing her face.
It was nearly nine in the morning when the girls finished unpacking. Mia’s parents had given them the morning to get settled and get used to the jet lag.
“I’m not too tired,” Vada said, “maybe I’ll go into town for the morning.”
“You sure you don’t need me to come with you?”
“Yeah, it’ll be fun. It’s about time I put my four years of high school French to the test.”
The road into town winded downhill, and she was grateful she used one of the bikes the Reeds had available at their villa, as she would have dreaded the trek back up, had she gone on foot. She mapped out exactly the way into the town square and was determined to check everything out before returning for lunch. Thank god for Google Maps.
She had also bought a paper map of the town in a nearby kiosk and, after nearly two hours of exploring, mapped out a general layout of notable places in town. There was a fountain in the middle of the square in front of a church that Vada would use as a reference for everything; from the Fountain facing the church going left would be the town hall and that little kiosk, going right would be the local post office and the way back to the villa, opposite the church facing ahead lead down a slanted cobblestone alley full of restaurants and gift shops, as well as the way to the beach.
It must have been in the high 80s (30s Celsius) that day, so Vada decided to reward herself with some ice cream in the town square before she headed back. It was so hot that when sitting on a bench in the shades, she still had to try and keep the ice cream from melting all over her lap.
“Lillian’s ice cream is nice, but it melts quickly. You should try Karim’s down the street.”
Vada looked up at the voice in surprise, as it was English that was being spoken to her.
“Oh, totally!” She replied quickly. “How did you know I speak English?”
“I haven’t seen you around here.”
“But I could have also known French, right?”
“Touché, but I also recognize a compatriot when I see one.”
You wore an oversized white button-up that barely skirted past your black shorts, and your flip-flops indicated that you might have had a better idea of what the weather was going to be like as opposed to her in her high-neck basketball shoes. Peaking out from between the hem of your shirt was a necklace in the shape of a hummingbird, dangling and reflected in the sun.
“That obvious, huh?”
“Maybe a little." You grinned and shook your head from side to side. "Only tourists go to Lillian for ice cream.”
“So you’re not one, I assume.”
“I wouldn’t say so, no. My family has been coming here every summer ever since I was eight. These people are probably sick of me by now.” You chuckled.
This is your time, Vada, be smooth. “Lucky for you, you’ll have someone new to entertain.” She grinned and pointed at herself.
. . . Adequate.
The melodic laugh that escaped you gave her a new-found confidence, and she decided that it was to be her new favorite sound.
“Alright, since you seem to know the area so well,” Vada said. “What’s fun to do around here?”
Conversation flowed so easily between the two of you, she had almost forgotten that she only met you 15 minutes ago. Granted, you were also easy on the eye, and Vada would always remember the way the water from the fountain reflected in waves across your skin.
At one point she had started talking about the time her family got stranded in the middle of nowhere on a road trip to Phoenix. Vada felt like she was talking too much, but the way you laughed along with her story made her feel like it wasn’t for naught.
The bell tower of the church rang throughout the square. Vada widened her eyes and checked her phone, it was noon.
"Shit, I have to get back. My host family's gonna wonder where I am." She stood up quickly and collected her bike. The height of the seat and her haste caused her to stumble, and she would have fallen if not for you grabbing her by the arm and holding her up.
"Oh, okay. I’m sure there’s a story about a daytime Cinderella somewhere.”
She looked up and you were smirking. "Vada," she said. Maybe she shouldn’t have told you, Cinderella was fine, you didn’t know each other.
She could barely make out your attempt at her name on your lips before you nodded.
“Y/N.” You held your hand out for her to take. There was that touch that changed the course of her summer, the one touch that set into motion a journey toward a certain feeling that Vada had never felt before.
"Bye, Y/N!" She called behind her before rounding the corner, past the post office, and back to the Reed villa.
Mia had been waiting by the front door and breathed a sigh of relief when she spotted Vada cycling uphill.
"Where the hell have you been? We thought you'd been kidnapped!"
"Wait, could you get kidnapped here?" Vada’s face dropped at the thought, even though she was positively out of breath.
"You could get kidnapped anywhere, V."
"Well, I got lost." She hopped off her bike and set it by the entrance. "My phone died so I couldn't use Maps."
Her friend rolled her eyes and led her inside where a hearty lunch awaited. It was mid-June and apricots were in season for dessert.
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It wasn't until late afternoon the next day that Vada regained the energy to go outside again. The jet lag had finally caught on, and she spent the morning asleep until noon. Mia had suggested going to the beach, which was great because she could see how things were, and either get into the water or take another nap.
Mia—being Mia—wore her bathing suit and a thin cardigan as her attire, while Vada decided on wearing an oversized tee and shorts over her bathing suit.
"Don't freak out. I've invited some friends. Just kids from the area," said Mia, once they arrived at the beach.
Vada stayed back, as Mia was greeted by several people similar in age to her, speaking in French at a pace her high school education couldn’t help her understand.
“This is Vada, she’s a friend from home.”
A curly-headed boy stood up from his lounge chair and sauntered over to give Mia a kiss on each cheek, then looked over to Vada and did the same. “Corentin, but please call me Coco,” he said and took both their bags. Vada didn’t miss the way his eyes lingered on Mia’s form a bit longer than normal.
“Come, Vada! Mia, where have you been hiding this one? I’m Marlène. This is Sasha.” The brunette pulled her by the hand and gestured to the boy sitting next to her. He was slender with blonde hair part in the middle. “We’re about to go into the water if you want to join.”
“Where’s Noémie?” asked Mia.
“Déjà à l’eau. No doubt to show off to the lifeguard.” Sasha snickered, nodding his head towards the water. He took another drag from his cigarette and rested his arm back against Marlène’s chair.
“Speaking of the lifeguard . . .” Vada followed Marlène’s gaze towards . . . you.
Her mouth hung open as she watched you, in red shorts and a white T-shirt, a whistle hanging from your neck. You pulled your sunglasses up to your head and gave Mia la bise.
Of course, she thought. She had hoped to see you again, but only when there was no one else around, and that you’d catch her by surprise when she was alone once more. She’d only met you, but she wished that she could have you all alone, not like a secret, but like a prized possession.
“And just how many people have died while you’re on watch?” Mia teased.
“Zero, but very soon,” you pointed at her, “one.”
When you turned to Vada, her breath hitched. “Hi,” you greeted with that warm smile again. Even in your work attire, she spotted that necklace next to your whistle.
“Y/N, this is—”
“Vada, the daytime Cinderella. We met yesterday in the square.” You replied. “Did I forget to mention I work here?”
Vada was grinning like an idiot, her cheeks tinted pink at the nickname. “Yup, you did.”
“Y/N!” Over jogged a gorgeous girl, even Vada had to admit. Her black bathing suit hugged her curves perfectly, and though her hair was completely wet, the water droplets clinging to her olive skin made her glow. “T'as prévu aller en boîte ce week-end, ou bien? J'ai chopé l'info qu'y a un nouveau DJ en ville, et il envoie du pâté!”
She was clinging onto your arm, and speaking way too fast for Vada to understand, but she picked up on some keywords: ce week-end, and nouveau DJ.
When she finally noticed Vada there, her excitement subsided, but she walked over anyway to greet her, like an afterthought. “Salut. I’m Noémie.”
“Hi. Vada.”
Just as quickly as you arrived, Noémie had led you away, talking your ear off about something that Vada didn’t have the heart to eavesdrop on. Her eyes followed your form, picking up on the way you kept your arms by your side even when Noémie was practically hanging off of you. In a sporadic moment, Vada thought she saw you looking back over her shoulder at the friend group, and maybe toward her.
“Your phone died, huh?” Mia poked her elbow into her side with a teasing grin.
“Shut up,” Vada murmured. “What’s the deal with them anyway?”
“They were together last summer,” Sasha replied, then turned to the others. “Plan cul, how do you say?”
“A fling, but Noémie seems more attached than Y/N ever did,” said Coco.
“No doubt Y/N has already found a new paramour for the summer,” Marlène commented.
“It’s summertime. Anything’s possible.”
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As much as she hated it, you plagued her mind, much more than she cared to admit. She didn’t want to think about what your initial conversation meant to you (if it did at all), or what the lack of words in your second meeting meant. She didn’t want to think about Noémie either, how she seemed so confident to get your attention, and an up-and-down look from her made Vada want to crawl into a hole.
She remembered the handshake. The speed at which she rode away wasn’t entirely to get home in time before Mia’s parents called the police, but to get away from the butterflies that burst in her stomach that moment her hand firmly shook yours. She’d seen how you greeted your friends, but to her, she offered a handshake. Though the gesture itself was completely platonic and can be passed off as a farewell between two strangers, she felt a sense of exclusivity, that American camaraderie you shared with her in a foreign land. Common courtesy as a mode of intimacy. Revisiting it now, Vada recognized it as a sign of attraction and an apprehension to the speed at which it enveloped her.
She would see you around town in your work uniform after your shift, sometimes you’d be talking to people, sometimes you were the buyer yourself. No matter the person though—from the tourists asking for directions to the old owner of the bookstore by the fountain, they always loved you and talked to you like you were their best friend. She’d see you from afar, wanting to talk to you, but then get anxious the moment you spotted her a give her a friendly wave.
Then there were times when you would come by the Reed villa. Philip and Andre always received you like you were an esteemed guest, gifting you fruits from the trees in the backyard. She loved to see how you acted around different people, and to the Reeds who had known you for years, you were awful shy.
“Invite your parents over. We should all have dinner sometime!”
“Oh, my parents aren’t here this summer. My dad’s busy with a conference in Singapore, but they’ll drop by at the end of July.”
Even the times you were invited to stay for supper, it was clear you knew how to hold a conversation over the dinner table. She wondered if you were studying to be a politician because you seemed to charm everyone and had the best manners. Mia would not-so-subtly yield the spot next to you for Vada, and secretly, she was glad to be sitting next to you.
For the first time in her life, she felt a force holding her back, preventing her from reaching out. Maybe it was because she had only known you for a couple of weeks but felt like you’d always been there, like a puzzle finally piecing together.
And every time, right before you left, after you had said goodbye to the Reeds, you’d find her somehow. “Bye,” would be all you said with an adoring smile, but Vada would be thinking about it until the next day.
She and Mia met up with the group again one night, this time at a nearby open-air disco. When she arrived, she could spot Sasha and Marlène already twirling each other around on the dance floor, she was laughing as he spun her around, cigarette between his lips. She felt a pang of envy, imagining that it was your arms around her waist instead as you spun her around without a care in the world, in front of everyone. Let them see. Let them see that you’re mine and I’m yours. If she were being honest, she only agreed to come just so she could see you again. She found you sitting at a table with Coco and Noémie, chatting away.
“Hi.” Her attention was focused on you. She couldn’t be more sober, and she wished she had taken a few puffs before coming.
As if having read her mind, Coco pulled out a couple of joints, lighting one and taking a puff himself before passing it to Noémie.
“You partake?” You shouted over the loud music.
“Oh, she partakes.” Mia nodded enthusiastically. “The first time she did weed she smoked most of my joint. Then proceeded to blabber on nonstop for two hours.”
You let out a laugh. “I like this one!”
She hated, despised even, the overwhelming feeling of wanting to be near you, to impress you, to feel special in your eyes as you were in hers. It was human nature; everyone liked feeling special, but somehow getting validation from you would make her ten times happier. She sat two seats away from you—next to Mia and Noémie—and once in a while, she would try and dart her eyes over to look at you ever so subtly. On a couple of occasions, her heart would jump when she noticed you were already looking back.
A few minutes later, Vada started to feel the effect of the weed, and Mia must have too because she pulled her toward the dance floor. Looking back, she saw you talking to Noémie. You didn’t look too happy and neither did she, having her arms crossed in front of her chest. Then, she walked outside and you followed her impatiently. When you returned, a polite smile was on your face when you noticed her looking for you.
“Are you okay?” She shouted, the weed had made her feel bold.
“Yeah! Everything’s fine.” You shouted back.
It might have been the weed or it was something that’s already been there, but Vada couldn’t take her eyes off of you. She took you by the hand, and there was that same spark of electricity again. You let her guide you, your hands never leaving hers as you moved with her.
It was about a quarter to midnight when everyone decided to split because frankly, everyone was too tired to continue. Vada said goodbye to Sasha and Marlène, the latter of whom gave her a big hug and repeatedly expressed her delight that Vada had decided to join them. Coco, already sober, offered to drive Mia home, but his ride was a scooter.
“Sorry, les gars,” Coco smiled sheepishly and asked Mia if she was ready, to which the girl only nodded.
“I’ll walk you home.” You said quietly, surprisingly timid. “Promise me you won’t turn into a pumpkin at midnight?”
She huffed through her nose and gave you a shove, but she was grinning. It was just the two of you now. Her pride was on the line, and so was her heart.
“Penny for your thoughts?” Your voice cut through the stillness of the night. Before that, the only sounds were that of your shoes brushing against the ground and the soft sighs of the ocean.
“Is everything okay with Noémie?”
You averted your eyes, your hand coming up to play with the hummingbird on your neck.
Maybe she shouldn’t have. “Shit, did I overstep?”
“No, no. It’s fine. It’s just Noë being Noë, she was out of line.” Your walls were up. “We were always close, she was the first friend I made here. And last summer we slept together.”
“Oh.” Her steps faltered.
“I stopped it before it could progress into anything beyond that, though. I’m just not ready.”
Vada nodded slowly. Loud and clear. Maybe that was the signal she needed, the insecure part of her thought it was that, but when she was with you, all she wanted to do was listen to the other part.
“I slept with Mia once, sophomore year.”
You looked over at her, seemingly surprised. “Mia? Huh. Never would have thought.”
“It was just that, though.” She flashed you a smile.
Vada felt that surge of closeness between you, your arm swinging beside her as you walked. The obsession with finding anything to relate to you prompted her to say it, like Hey, I’m like you, I know how you feel. Maybe it wasn’t the best thing to tell you, she might have screwed up.
You mirrored her smile, but something about it told her that your heart wasn’t entirely in it. Tell me what you’re thinking, Y/N. She wanted to get inside your head and know everything you were thinking, to go all the way with that closeness. Even as friends, one has to start from somewhere.
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It was radio silence from you for the next few days. Vada came up with all the excuses as to what it could have been, and when she grew tired and angry at herself for thinking so much about you, she tried to distract herself by doing other things. She helped Philip collect figs from the trees in the backyard; she looked up the fortress nearby you told her about the day you met and biked all the way over there, even though it was a half an hour's ride each way; she finally took out the book she packed with her and began reading it whilst sunbathing. It was starting to feel like a summer that she should be enjoying.
Her mom called and was happy to hear that her daughter was going outside and doing fun things. “The people are nice,” Vada would say, “I met some of Mia’s friends.” And in true Mom fashion, her mom would quickly squeeze in a “Don’t do drugs and use protection” to which she ended the call and almost threw her phone across the room.
She would also call Nick every other day. I met someone, she said one day after having finally gathered the courage to vocalize her crush. Girl, I know. Mia had told him. When? Literally the second day. She said you were so obvious.
It was as if the weather knew too. It started raining all day when she decided to go to the beach one day, souring her mood entirely. She would sit by the entrance in the backyard watching the rain, and sure enough, she was thinking about what you were doing on the opposite end of town.
“It’s unlike you to be so hung up on someone,” Mia told her when they were hanging out in Mia’s room.
“I’m not hung up on someone,” her words trailed at the end, mindlessly flipping through the magazine in front of her.
“So am I just crazy for thinking that you want to pounce on Y/N every three seconds?”
“Okay, but what about you and Coco? He follows you around everywhere like a lost puppy.”
“Coco’s just shy,” her friend blushed. “And stop changing the subject.”
“There’s nothing between us, at least not yet.”
“So you do want something to happen.”
“Shut up! Mia!” She hid her face behind her hands and writhed on Mia’s bed in embarrassment. “I’m not talking to you about this anymore.”
“Alright, alright,” Mia held her hands up as her laughter subsided.
“Look, I just want to—” Vada took a moment. “I want to test the waters, okay? Y/N is special, and I don’t want to ruin anything.”
Mia nodded, understanding. “I just don’t want you to be misled. I mean, you’ve seen how it was with Noémie.”
“I know.” Vada smiled softly. “I know what I’m getting into. Zero expectations.”
She wanted to believe what she told Mia too, but then when she saw texts from you the next day, there was no hiding that a connection was what she so tirelessly wanted, and needed.
hey it’s y/n Sent 3:23pm
mia gave me your number, i hope you don’t mind Sent 3:23pm
call me when you see this? Sent 3:24pm
Damn you, Mia, but also, thank you.
She didn’t work up enough courage to call you until later that night. Of course, it could have been something dire, but then you would have called her first, right? I am such a wimp.
“Hello?”
“Hi,” she rubbed her hands against her shorts. “it’s Vada. You wanted me to call you?”
“Yeah. I was gonna just text you, but I don’t know . . .” You hesitated for a moment. “Anyway, you ever been to Antibes?”
“No, why?”
“Well, I’m going there on Friday for my apprenticeship, and I was wondering if you wanted to come with? I’m just giving some manuscripts to my mentor, and then leaving them with him for a few hours to review, so we can make a fun day out of it. It’s a one-hour drive, so I don’t plan on staying overnight.”
“Friday you said?” Vada took a deep breath to still her racing heart. “I don’t think I got anything better to do that day.”
“Great!” You said. “I’ll pick you up at 9am?”
“Sounds like a plan.”
“Cool, see you then!”
There was something frightening about when things go exactly how you wanted them. It was inch-perfect, the puzzle pieces just slotted in place as if they were always fated to be. You were the first to reach out; she thought it would be easier that way, she’d just have to take your hand and come along. But there was a certain apprehension that Vada had as if she was walking straight into the lion’s den like a deer blinded by hunger. What if she loses her heart? She was aware of the dangers of heartbreak, of course—she was no fool—but the thought of giving her heart to you, then watching you walk away with it like an unwanted gift was too devastating.
Mia was practically bouncing off the walls when Vada told her about the phone call, saying that in all seven years of knowing you, she had never been special enough to receive a call. She didn’t exactly say the latter part, but she all but implied it.
On Friday morning, Vada woke up earlier than usual, made herself some breakfast, and was already waiting at the door with a backpack by 8:45. No later than 9:05, you arrived with a Volkswagen Golf, sunglasses on, and a bright smile.
“Music?” You offered, turning on Bluetooth. “Also, if you need a pee break, please tell me. Bladders can be untimely.”
“Noted,” Vada giggled.
The car ride was mostly silent, aside from the music you let her pick and the fun facts you enlightened her with about some of the landmarks you drive past.
“That one I believe was built in the later 1600s and owned by a minor Provence viscount. It was also in a strategic location for the military until it was abandoned after the French Revolution. Also, the viscount built the castle for his second wife, but she died shortly after giving birth to their child.”
“That’s a little sad,” said Vada.
“She was also 14 when she died and he was in his 50s.”
Vada grimaced. “Maybe death was a sweet relief.”
“Yeah. It was more common back in the day than you think.”
“How do you know all this?” She brought her legs up against her chest.
“I like history. I like to learn about the areas I’m in, and in the time that I’ve been here, I’ve had a lot of opportunities to learn.”
She watched your side profile for a moment. “You mentioned some manuscripts. What is it for?”
“Is this an interview now?” You laughed and glanced over at her, and she looked down with a blush. “It’s for my bachelor’s thesis. Technically I don’t start writing until next year, but I like to practice whenever I can. This one that I’m giving to my mentor is a collection of essays.”
“Can I read them?” You looked over for a moment, then reached behind you to grab a file of paper and handed it to her.
Vada settled back and opened the first pages, and read in silence. She could feel you spare short glances at her from time to time, nervously watching for her reaction, but she was so engrossed in your writing it almost didn’t matter that you were sitting next to her. This might have been what it feels like to peer into someone’s soul, to see the traces of fresh blood as they lay their heart onto paper.
It was a beautiful sunny day, the waters shone a deep turquoise, and the French Riviera looked glorious as ever. And yet, she could only get lost in your words.
“This is beautiful,” Vada breathed, setting the papers down on her lap. “You’re amazing.”
You looked ahead at the road, eyes covered by shades, but your large grin was unmissable.
You parked the car on the side of the street in front of several apartment buildings. “Don’t go anywhere, I’ll be right back.” Vada only nodded and watched you cross the street with the manuscripts in your hand. She liked how it felt between you two, and she would gladly accompany you on every trip until you were sick of her.
Mere minutes later, you returned. “I hope you’re ready for the best adventure of your life.”
Only, she knew it would be.
You first led her to the market in the vieille ville, where you bought some fruits and snacks for the way. Vada also got to witness firsthand your bargaining skills, asking for a price and then pretending to walk away until the vendor becomes desperate enough to settle. “I used to be really bad at this, but then I watched my mom do it, and now I kind of just do. These vendors hike up their prices for tourists like crazy.” You walked away proudly with a bag of food.
As the both of you walked through the picturesque alleys and streets, you proceeded to tell her more about the city and its history. She listened carefully, hanging onto every word that left your lips. You told her about how Antibes was first named Antipolis and part of Ancient Greece before it was built by the Romans in the time of Julius Caesar; how in the Middle Ages the city fell under the fiefdom of the Grimaldi family, the main branch of which is now royalty of Monaco.
“Sorry, you gotta stop me before I go on a tangent,” you chuckled, scratching the back of your neck. “I’ve been talking for ages.”
“No, I like it.” She said quickly. “I like listening to you talk. It’s no surprise many artists were so taken with this place.”
You raised your eyebrows in surprise.
“Hemingway, Picasso, and Monet all had a fascination with this city.” She had to look that up, but you didn’t need to know that.
“That’s right,” you nodded. “In fact, I’ll show you the spot where Monet painted one of his paintings later.”
After lunch, you both walked along the city walls that looked out to the beach.
“I’m just saying, Ratatouille piqued a lot of interest in the dish, and it wasn’t a coincidence. I mean, I’ve never tried it but I’d love to, just because it looked so good in the movie.” Vada said.
“You’ve never had ratatouille?!” You exclaimed loudly making Vada laugh. “Man, it’s a staple here in southern France! I’ll have to make you some because that is just criminal.”
“Okay, Chef Remy. I’m looking forward to it.”
“Actually, I’ll make a whole batch for you and the Reeds too. They always give me fruits from their backyard,” you said. “How did you meet Mia anyway?”
At the question, Vada’s smile collapsed into a frown. “Um . . .” You watched her, a confused look on your face. “I’ve always known who she was. I mean, it’s Mia, you know? But one day we met officially in the bathroom at school.”
“Oh,” you voiced. You must be confused as to why that was so hard to squeeze out, but the latter part, the part she kept hidden, she had been trying to squeeze out for two years.
“We were in the bathroom while there was a shooting going on.”
You opened your mouth to say something, but you only ended up watching her. Then, a moment later, “I didn’t mean to . . .”
“No, it’s fine.” Vada shook her head. “You didn’t know.”
“I’m so sorry. You don’t have to tell me anything else if you don’t want to.” Your eyes softened and you looked like you had kicked a puppy.
“I know,” she said, taking a breath.
“I see it on the news all the time, but I can’t imagine what it’s like to be there,” you said quietly. “Thank you for trusting me enough to tell me.”
Vada hated having to talk about it. If she could have it her way, she would bury it deep down so it never sees the light of day again. Still, she has to talk about it to her friends, her family, her therapist sometimes. She hated talking about it because she’d have to see the way people’s faces contort uncomfortably as they scramble to find consoling words to say. They don’t make her feel any better, and she never liked people seeing that broken side of her reflected back at them.
But when she looked at you right now, there wasn’t a trace of ego in the way that you look back at her. Deep down, she had always wanted to lay it on you, to give you a piece of her, not because she had to, but because she wanted to.
Because she wanted you to see it.
Vada found your hand by your side, soft and comforting. She kept her eyes on them; her hand and your hand, intertwined together. You embraced it and rubbed the back of her hand with your thumb before kissing it. A kiss of friendship, a kiss of love, a kiss of two young people in a city far from home together who had only just met. A kiss that said I see you, I hear you, you’ve got me around your corner.
“You wanna go grab some dinner?” She asked.
Dinner turned into even more talk. Towards late afternoon, you said you wanted to catch the sunset before going to the spot you claimed Monet painted the city. It was a quick drive, but you pumped your fists in the air when you got out of the car and were happy with how the sun rolled over the city just right.
“Come on, you’re gonna miss it!” You jogged towards the edge of the water, beaming like a little kid. It had become natural between the two of you to share skin-ship.
Behind the trees, there it was. Across the blue water, Antibes basked in the last few rays of sunlight in stoic tranquility, just as Monet had seen it. Perhaps she was in one of Monet’s paintings, frozen in time, stuck with you.
She found your hand again, your left this time, and once again your gaze followed, but this time, you trailed your gaze to her eyes. God help me, she thought.
There were so many things Vada wanted to blurt out, and she was close to it. Holding back was never her strong suit, but once she got a good look at the depth of your eyes, she felt that they were better appreciated in silence. Words don’t do anything but snitch on you anyway.
She didn’t need to, because the moment she turned to look at you, she felt you grab her face gently and lay the softest kiss on her lips.
The sun continued to glare, yet Antibes stared on.
Did Monet ever paint lovers?
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Liar.
Liar.
Vada felt like she’d make a mistake for giving in to it. She saw her younger self in the square that day, by the fountain, eating ice cream. She saw you talking to her, and she wanted to scream and tell herself to stop, to save herself the heartache. No one else was to blame, not even you, only her.
Antibes was a week ago, and she hasn’t really spoken to you ever since. She replayed the kiss over and over in her head, trying to pinpoint exactly the moment when you decided that keeping your distance would be the best course of action.
But then she remembered the way you acted alone with her was much different than how you were with the others around. She saw the way your eyes linger on her when you thought she was admiring the sea. She noticed the way you smiled bashfully when she brought up how good your essays were in front of your mentor. She remembered how you never let go of her hand when she grabbed it while you watched the sunset.
Marlène and Sasha had been a big help in getting her out of her slump. Mia was there to cuddle with her the first couple of nights after Vada told her everything, but rendezvous with Coco had kept her busy. But Marlène and Sasha were cool, and probably one of the healthiest couples she’s ever seen at the age of 20. She felt like their adoptive child hanging out with them, especially when Sasha would greet her by endearingly calling her Petit Vada.
“And have you talked to her?” Marlène asked, leaning over the lounge chair. She and Vada had been sunbathing and swimming at the Reed villa that afternoon.
“No.” Vada sighed. “It’s just—I just don’t get it! Why does she have to be so mysterious all the time? Like one moment we would be fine, and the next she’s somewhere else, someone else entirely.”
“That’s Y/N,” Marlène chuckled and took a sip from her margarita. “You know, when I and Sash first got together, he wasn’t as talkative as he is now. In fact, I was the one to ask him out. Sometimes you just have to suck it up and tell them.”
“That’s so easy to say,” Vada muttered, and put her face in her hands.
“That’s the kind of attitude you should save for when you go back to your other life, your American life. Are you going to university this fall? Summer’s halfway over, you know? Are you going to mull over it and let it pass by you?”
“Yes.” Vada’s voice was muffled through her hands.
“Carpe diem, mon chère.” Marlène shrugged. “It’s cheesy but it’s true.”
Andre being the ever BBQ dad that he was, decided to host a get-together with some friends that night, and encouraged Mia to invite hers. Everyone that Vada met at the beach showed up, including Noémie, except for you.
“She said she was busy,” Noémie waved it off. Vada pursed her lips. The fact that you talked to Noémie first stirred uneasy envy in the pit of her stomach.
She didn’t have the stomach to sit outside and spoil everyone’s fun with her sour face (most of all she didn’t want to give Noémie that satisfaction), so she made a plate for herself and ate in the living room.
“Hey, kiddo,” she looked up and saw Philip walk past her toward the kitchen. “Not feeling the party?”
Vada made a face to indicate a yes, but she didn’t want to explain further. “Just not really in the mood, sorry.”
“It’s okay. You can’t stop Andre from barbecuing when he has the urge or he’d literally combust.”
She nodded and smiled. “We don’t want that.”
“We’re serving fruits now. Want me to get you some?” He pointed at her empty plate.
“Yes, please. Thanks.” She hesitated for a beat. “Hey, Philip?”
The man turned around.
“How did you know that you wanted to marry Andre?”
Philip contemplated for a second, then walked over to the couch where she sat, leaning against it. “I didn’t wake up one day and choose to propose to him, Vada. It’s just one of those things when you start to notice that gnawing feeling in your chest. And you’d have to ask yourself, ‘Would I be fine going the rest of my life without them?’”
Vada nodded slowly and smiled as the man went back to the kitchen. She opened her phone and went to your messages. The last text from you was from a week ago. She began typing.
can we talk? Sent 8:47pm
A mere five minutes later, you responded.
of course Sent 8:47pm
meet me at the fountain at 10? Sent 8:48pm
see u there Sent 8:48pm
Vada found you walking back and forth by the Fountain, one hand in deep your pants pocket, the other holding a cigarette between your thumb and index, and puffing it as if it would give you a lifeline. She got off her bike and set it by the railing of the Fountain where you stood.
“You smoke?”
“Not usually,” you attempted to smile, shaking your arms as if to shake off an invisible burden. You were anxious, it was clear.
Vada didn’t know what to say next, so she leaned against the railing of the Fountain, rolling a pebble back and forth underneath her shoe.
“I’m sorry I didn’t come to see you earlier. I was busy.”
She nodded half-heartedly, not looking up. She wished you’d come up with a better excuse than that.
“Are you angry with me?”
“Angry’s a strong word, Y/N.”
Another puff. “Are you discontent with me?”
She should have prepared herself for the nit-picky bullshit from a writer. “I don’t have a valid reason to be upset with you, not really. Unless I’ve been reading this wrong.”
“You haven’t.” You answered quickly and met her eyes. “I promise. It wasn’t very mature of me. In fact, I think I acted like a total idiot. I’m really sorry.”
“Do you regret kissing me?”
“No, not at all. And you have to believe me.” You sighed exasperatedly, and she almost felt bad because you looked so anxious.
“Tell me what you’re thinking.” Vada stepped towards you, facing you head-on. “You’re asking me whether I’m upset with you, but I don’t even know what you’re thinking most of the time. And then you disappear as though I did something wrong! How fair is that?”
You nodded and took another drag from your cigarette. Then, you dropped the butt on the floor and stomped on it. “I’m thinking that I really want to kiss you right now.”
Vada scoffed. “I don’t believe you.”
You stood up from your spot against the railing, your face now inches from hers. “It’s true.”
“No, it’s not.”
“Yeah, it is.”
She felt the exact moment her body became as light as a feather as your lips pressed against hers. Her hands clenched by her side, and come up to hold onto your shoulders, because she was afraid her legs might give out under her. You angled your face and deepened the kiss, and Vada sighed into your mouth. This is what the poets all wrote about, the inevitability of giving in to what you’ve wanted for so long. She’s caged in you in between her body and the Fountain, kissing you and touching you as though her life depended on it.
You moved to lower your kisses to her neck, but she leaned back and saw a dark look in your eyes.
The sound of a street musician playing the saxophone in the distance somewhere echoed through the square. Wordlessly, Vada took your hand.
She followed you by bike towards your house, which was towards the end of the street closer to the beach. You returned to speaking only one or two words to her, telling her to put her bike by the door next to yours, to take her shoes off before coming in, and whether she wanted some water.
“Nice place.” It was another thing that she never thought to ask you about, nor did you tell her. But it wasn’t a surprise that your family was loaded too, considering the vacation home in an area like this.
“Thanks. It’s my parents’, though.”
“What do they do again?”
“Well, my mom does interior design and my dad is a football agent.”
“Football agent? Who does he represent?”
“Mostly American players in Europe; Christian Pulisic, Luca de la Torre, Gio Reyna. I remember my dad bringing me along to dinner with Sergio Agüero once because he considered a move to LAFC. That was pretty cool.” You stood against the wall in the hallway, next to the staircase, kicking your feet aimlessly. The small talk was to cover up for something else.
You fell into a deep silence. Vada took a step forward under the yellow light of the hallway and took your hand, stroking it gently.
“Can I kiss you?” She asked quietly.
You and she both knew you were way past just kissing. This was new territory, and there would be no going back after this.
You nodded, and she surged forwards to kiss you slowly. This time, it felt different. You kissed her without the chastity and fear of being looked in on but without the hunger of overcoming lust. It was a perfect blend of passion and appreciation, a marriage of everything felt within the past few weeks.
You lead her upstairs, towards your room. Once inside, your lips were still glued to hers as you let her walk backward, though your eagerness made her trip on your feet and fall onto the mattress.
“Oh, shit. I’m sorry. ‘M sorry.” The two of you burst into a fit of giggles as you tried to make it up to her with a shower of kisses.
As her giggles quickly turned into pleasant sighs, she decided to surrender herself to you, to her deepest desires ever since the day she arrived. You had charmed her from the moment she laid eyes on you. But now to feel your hands on her in all the right places took her to new heights of pleasure that she’s never experienced before. How beautiful it was to be herself, to be here in this moment, and to cherish and be cherished by you. But most of all, to hear you whisper her name and profanities in the most sinful and vulnerable ways, so unlike your polished and composed self in front of other people.
Vada, Vada, Vada . . .
She awoke in the morning, the sun piercing through the horizontal slits of the shut windows. There was sweat sticking to her skin, but she didn’t want to get up and shower, not when you were still soundly asleep, arm loosely wrapped around her torso. It was then that she realized that you both were still very naked, but she reveled in the skin-to-skin contact like it was giving her strength and vitality. The golden hummingbird sat on your chest, rising and falling with each of your breaths.
Vada caught the moment your eyes fluttered open and focused on her. Then a smile.
“What time is it?” You asked.
Vada leaned over to check the clock on the wall. “7:41.”
You grumbled. “My shift starts at 8:30.”
“You better chop-chop then.”
“I don’t wanna go.”
“Then don’t.” Vada placed her chin on your upper chest. “Stay here with me, and we can recreate last night.”
You chuckled and kissed her once. “That sounds really tempting.”
And yet, you moved to get up, but she held you back. “Five more minutes.”
“Only five?” You smirked.
“You don’t think I can do it in five?”
You grinned like a Cheshire cat and settled back.
Vada had to let you go eventually, you let her stay at yours and do as she pleased. She suddenly remembered that she never texted Mia back about staying out overnight, and sure enough, flipped her phone over to a few missed calls and text messages. After texting her back and reassuring her that she was okay, she got up and went to take a shower.
You came back around four and, as much as she didn’t want to admit it, it felt like forever until you walked through the doors again. And the moment you did, she pounced on you like a lion.
“I’m so sweaty,” you laughed but soon became lost in the sensation of her lips against yours.
You made love again that afternoon. Vada could almost picture the routine that she and you so easily fell into, how the puzzle pieces fit together so seamlessly. It almost felt like she had cheated somehow to feel this way, that it truly felt as magical and wonderful as it was laying in your arms, both of you stark naked. You had showered and smelled much like lavender. Your eyes were closed but you weren’t asleep, as she watched your chest rise and fall steadily. Sometimes you would murmur something and she would talk to you quietly, knowing you were tired from a day’s work at the beach.
“I knew I liked you from the first day, at the Fountain,” you said.
“Then why didn’t you say anything?!” Vada looked up and hit your chest playfully.
“I didn’t want to come on too strong and scare you away!”
“Jesus Christ,” she sat up and put her face in her palms. “Y/N, I wanted you so badly. Like, I could not go a day without thinking about you. It was actually becoming unhealthy how much I did.”
“Oh? I’m flattered.” You smirked and rubbed her knee. “Why didn’t you say anything?”
“Because . . . After Antibes, I wasn’t sure if you felt the same way.”
Your face dropped slightly. “I was scared to get close to someone. I think I caught myself then after we kissed. It was scary how much I wanted your company.”
Vada could understand. You’ve only known each other for three weeks. What were you to each other? Maybe it didn’t matter, there was something comforting about just existing as two souls being present with each other. She realized that the fear she’d harbored about losing her heart was all in vain; you never took it for yourself, you’d only pressed your hand against her chest and encouraged it to keep beating—to keep being hers—while you’d hoped that she would do the same to you.
“If you could go back to that day at the Fountain, and do it differently, would you?” Vada asked.
You thought for a second, then shook your head. “No. I always want to remember you this way.”
Vada swallowed thickly and avoided your eyes. “We’re leaving next week.”
A silence hung in the air, unspoken words stuck in her throat. Tell me to stay. Tell me you’ll come back with me. Tell me you’ll never love anyone else. Tell me you’d forget about me so as to soothe the pain.
“Then let’s make it count,” you brushed a hair from her eyes. “We’re not the first, and we won’t be the last to love each other.”
She dreaded the flight back home, having to pretend leaving you wouldn’t be as hard in front of Mia and her parents, and about 300 strangers. She’d miss biking everywhere and the beach and Lillian’s ice cream (she had grown to like it over Karim’s). She’d remember Antibes and Monet’s spot. She’d remember your face and how you seemed to appear in every memory of this trip.
Vada felt you brushing your finger under her eye and realized that it was wet. Then you brought her into your arms and held her tight as she hid from the world in your neck. You cooed and somehow it made Vada feel worse and started crying harder, clinging to your skin desperately.
She’d find space for the grief she was going to feel in her heart somewhere because she knew she’d rather live with the pain than be without you again.
The last week started on a Wednesday. Vada did the usual things she did the last few weeks—go to the beach, bike to town, hang out with the group; she wanted to soak into that last semblance of her summer routine before she had to leave, and everything would be different. She hadn’t given college much thought either. Deciding to move halfway across the country for it was the least stressful part of the whole process, as she was going in undecided. Mia was happy though, because they would only be a few hours apart by train.
Until then, Vada was too afraid to ask you about what would happen after the summer ended. If she asked, it would mean that it was close and it was real. You’d go back to school in Paris and start on your thesis, and everything would go back to the way it was.
Everything would go back to the way it was. As if nothing happened.
She had lived four weeks with you, how was she ever going to go the rest of her life without you?
She met up with you after dinner one night at the beach. The tides had come in much closer and were pulling on her heartstrings mercilessly. In and out, in and out . . . You were as quiet as the night, your eyes gazed towards the distance somewhere, looking pensive.
Still, she was afraid to ask.
“I lied,” you finally spoke. “I wished I had told you sooner how much I liked you.”
Vada remained silent and nodded. “We’ll call.”
“It won’t be the same.”
She knew too that it would never be the same the moment she leaves France. She realized that though she was afraid to ask, time was not on her side, and she didn’t have the luxury to be afraid anymore.
“Will you stay over tonight?” Vada asked, and you looked so happy that she did.
Once you stumbled through the door, you leaned in to kiss her instantly. Between wanting to kiss you back and suppressing moans, she told you to be quiet as you followed her upstairs, hand in hand. You failed, however, actually, both of you did, as your giggles trailed up the stairs and through the hallway. Vada would be lucky if only Mia heard you.
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The day she left for the airport, you came over to say goodbye. You greeted the Reeds first, giving Philip and Andre big hugs, then turned to Mia to hug as well and kiss her on the forehead.
Vada waited in the backyard. She felt almost pathetic and needy for wanting you to come out here quicker. It won’t be the same.
“Andre gave me this to keep for my parents.”You held up a bottle of wine by the neck. “1983, nice.”
Your smile died down when you noticed her silence. “You got everything?”
She nodded. Wordlessly, she stepped forwards to wrap her arms around your frame. She thought she’d cry, but it was as if her brain was already actively shutting down trying to block out this memory to save her the future heartbreak.
You pressed her tightly against your chest and swayed her back and forth. Upon releasing her, you set down the bottle of wine next to your feet and took off your necklace.
“I want you to have this.” You opened her palm and neatly placed the jewelry inside. “That way, you won’t forget.”
How could you ever think that I would forget when I’m afraid I’ll never be able to let go of this summer?
“I wish we had more time,” Vada said.
“Bye, Cinderella.” Your eyes were glossy now.
The car door was wide open, waiting to take her away from you. For a split second, she considered dropping everything to stay.
She leaned in to kiss you once, deep and hard, “Bye, Y/N.” Then she walked away, the hummingbird clenched in her fist.
You followed her and watched her get in the car. You watched her close it with force and you watched her refuse to make eye contact with you, but you saw the way her lips trembled. You watched the car take her away from you and grazed the spot on your chest where the hummingbird was missing.
It was mid-July, the hottest day of the year, and yet, the ocean waves—blue as it gets—continued to crash against the shore, on and on and on.
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arachnoia · 11 months
Text
gone ➶ . ˚ ༉‧₊˚ˑ༄ؘ | miguel o’hara
miguel o'hara x fem! reader
a/n: i think that atp, im just a miguel o’hara writer (not that im complaining but gimmie requests pls !! theyre open on my acc !!) this is also a drabble ive been wanting to write because i’ve always wanted to write angst (well tbh idk what this is?) but wasn’t sure how to? lowkey i want this to be a story that isn’t just a one shot but lmk if you guys want more of this? im just trying stuff out!
pt2 - ‘holy shock’ pt 3- ‘finally’
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───
“Breathe in, breathe out...”
The beautiful city stunned you as you stood on top of a random building, breathing in its modern, refreshing look.
It kind of took your breath away, contradictory to what you just told yourself a few seconds ago.
You barely finished another mission as your universe’s one and only Spider-Silk. Was it tiring? Hell yes, no doubt. But you never took a moment to actually admire Earth-928’s Nueva York, where Spider Society headquarters was located. Nueva York was also the place where you were if it wasn’t fighting crime and going to grad school in your own universe’s New York.
You usually swing to the top of a business building, a little bit far from Spider Society headquarters. It was quiet and peaceful. It was your thinking place where you could release any emotions you wanted to spill when you couldn’t anywhere else since you can’t really spill your emotions if you were to be taken seriously.
Plus, the one person who you expressed your deepest emotions, is gone.
As you simply stared into space while remembering the feeling you felt this morning.
You noticed some tears gathering at the outside corners of your eyes. Your eyelids began to droop, and you began to sob quietly as your chest hurt from, what some call “heartbreak”.
To be completely honest though, it was just melancholy and depression from what happened hours prior.
You couldn’t say that the emotion you felt for him or what you feel is loving him because it wasn’t love.
It felt like something stronger. But you knew it wasn’t reciprocated back.
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───
“So why don’t you just kick your professor’s ass?” Miguel joked. His laugh made you feel warm inside. It was a cute laugh in your opinion.
The two of you were sitting down, at the building you like to think at, munching on sweet, baked, fig empanadas from a lady's restaurant in your universe. Doña Rosa? She was a nice lady and safe to say, Miguel would definitely come back for the empanadas.
“Please, O’Hara. I’d get simply kicked out and would have to never show my face ever again…But the bastard deserves it for ripping apart my paper on exploring different dimensions with colliders!”
He chuckled. “Right, because you have experience. Do you not? Y/l/n?”
“EXACTLY. BUT NOT EVEN GRAMMARLY HELPED ME NOT GO THROUGH HIS REIGN OF TERROR!” You felt pissed, but Miguel found it absolutely hilarious to see you worked up as you angrily took a bite out of your empanada. It was cute.
“Swear to god, that bitch is scarier than most of the stupid anomalies we fight,” You pouted and glanced at him. He looked like he was trying to not start laughing even harder than he was before. “Y/l/n. Just calm down it doesn’t matter. Plus didn’t you mention it was like 10% of your grade? You’ll be fine it’s not that bad.”
You smirked at him. “Oh, so you’re trying to say it’s still bad?”
“No…but look at me.” You turned to his direction as he placed his empanada on a napkin next to the rest of the lot and he rested his hands on your shoulders.
“Breathe in. Breathe out.” You chuckled at his direction.
“Miguel, you sound like a yoga instructor."
“No no, I’m being serious here! No dejas que esa mierda te moleste, okay?”
You raised your eyebrow and smiled playfully. “Alright, like you’re the calmest person on this Earth,” He laughed. “I’m not but you’re not like me. I don’t want that to affect you, especially because it doesn’t matter.”
“Now. Breathe in…”
You softly smiled at him, to which he returned, “And breathe out.”
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───
“It's pleasant, isn't it?” Peter replied as he began to go in your direction, breaking up your train of thought. He and Mayday gave you a sad look as they walked over to hug your shaky form.
“How-?”
“Y/n, I saw you swinging here after barely teleporting here. What’s wrong?”
You didn’t know what to say. You felt a metaphoric weight on your shoulders as you struggled to tell Peter.
“Was it perhaps…Miguel?” You felt like laughing. Here you were, crying while Peter was acting full-on dad and Mayday was playing with her Spider-Man beanie. It would be a very unusual sight to someone who was just viewing you three at a distance.
“I’m just going to take that as a yes,” Peter said as he sat down on the roof and patted to the space next to him. “Take a seat, Y/l/n.”
You followed his directions and sat down.
It was quiet and a bit windy. It gave you a sad memory and you felt like you were drowning in it.
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───
You felt a rush of anxiety and couldn’t breathe.
“I CAN’T. I CAN’T DO IT, O’HARA," you screeched, scratching Miguel's arm in excruciating pain.
“YES YOU CAN, Y/L/N!! CALM DOWN!”
The two of you were in a mission to stop an anomaly. You were one of the first to start attacking…and one of the first to be badly injured. Your right thigh was impaled with several medium sized pieces of glass from being thrown to a glass building and you ran out of webs to shoot. You froze and wanted to cry, feeling vulnerable.
Miguel went over to try to help you as the other Spiders went to attack said anomaly. You knew each other as friends since you were one of the first Spiders ever to be recruited to the Spider Society so you knew each other pretty well. When he saw you injured, he quickly saved some civilians and rushed to your direction.
“Yes, you can Y/l/n. Look at me. Breathe in.” Your eyes widened as you saw him grab the largest piece of glass. He had 2 pieces of cloth with him. “No, stop looking at them and look at me. Breathe in, goddamn it.”
You stared at him and he gave you a piece to bite down. You tried to calm down as he took the piece out and screamed into the cloth. “I’m going to wrap it up, okay?” He said, earning a nod from you. “Good girl. Now breathe in…”
“…Breathe out.” You said.
“That’s my girl,” He said as he smiled at you and carried you with the rest of the civilians.
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───
“Breathe in, breathe out,” You whispered. Saying that phrase now just made your tongue feel bitter. Like eating a sour candy except it doesn’t turn out sweet at the end, but just making you frown.
Peter smiled and turned to you, “Now tell me what happened, kid. People don’t just run away before saying hi to their favorite person, therefore being me? !”
You scoffed, “Peter, no offense but why does it matter to you? You should be focusing on other things other than my well-being.”
Peter raised his eyebrow and rolled his eyes. “Listen, kid. You and the other Spiders like Gwen or Miles, matter to me.”
He covered Mayday’s ears. “Shit, even Miguel. If I see you mopey and sad and what not, of course, I’m going to be worried!”
“Really?” You were shocked. No one really has given you that fatherly attention like Peter has.
The only one who would really listen to you, was Miguel. But you can’t really rely on him now, can you?
“Yup. Now tell me what’s going on? Is everything okay?” Your breath hitched and you froze.
You then took a deep breath, sighed, and smiled bitterly.
“Miguel, he told me he wants me gone from his life,” you said as you felt a sudden pang in your chest.
Just feeling those words leave your lips made the melancholy come back even stronger.
And it hurt like fucking hell.
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strawberryfairi · 5 months
Note
Gurlllll, the choso fic....more please!!!! 🥵🥵🥵
Apartment 519... | Neighbor! Choso Kamo X Fem Reader Part 2
A short, sexy thirst (with a little more plot this time)💦 Choso's eager to give you better than your ex could...
↳ A/N🧚🏾‍♀️: Ask and u shall receive...I been cookin'🫡 I hope you enjoy this one as much as the first💚
Part 1
w.c. 2.1k
It's been two days since your breakup...and since your neighbor Choso went and blew your mind in your bed.
You really weren't sure what to do from here. He'd made it clear his intentions with you, which now that you think about it, was very fitting with his usual sweet and considerate character. It's just...you wanted to make the right choice, and you weren't sure what that right choice even was.
Flashback 2 Night Ago
You were laid on your bed next to him, completely exhausted and beyond satisfied. Choso was careful with you, not wanting to come on too strong yet still wanted-no needed for you to understand what this had meant to him. So he leans on his elbow, resting his head on his palm as he looks down at you.
"I uhh...I don't want you to think I was just using you while you were vulnerable. I really meant everything I said, and I-..." He trails off nervously, looking to the side for a moment before steeling himself. "I don't want this to have been just a regular one night stand, and..if you want, I could maybe take you out to dinner some time?" He finishes, looking you in the eyes with as much sincerity as he could muster.
You heart strings pulled in your chest. It was just so much happening in one day. It's not like you weren't flattered or anything it's just...everything's moving so damn fast.
It had only been just a few hours ago that you'd found your boyfriend with a whole other woman, sloppily kissing each other in his car. Now you're with someone else already too, having had such amazing sex and now he's telling you he basically wants more.
"I...don't know what to say." You murmur hesitantly.
"No no, you don't have to say anything!" He blurts out, placing a hand on your bare shoulder.
"I just didn't want you to think I was trying to take advantage of you. I think you're really beautiful, and I wanna get to know you more." He adds, giving you the most cutest nervous smile you've ever seen.
It makes a smile of your own creep across your lips. "Thank you, Choso. You're really sweet." Leaning over, you plant a soft kiss on his rosy cheek, unintentionally giggling at the goofy-lovestruck look on his face.
"Will you think about it? About me taking you out?" He asks, eyes sparkling hopefully.
It was almost shocking how nervous he is when just a bit ago he seemed so confident, so self-assured. Right now he's damn near reminding you of a puppy.
"Yeah. I will."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Present
The morning after your night with Choso, he'd placed his number on a small piece of paper, leaving it on the night stand on your side of the bed.
Now, two days later, you still haven't touched it.
It seemed like the right decision, just don't touch it so you could give yourself time to actually process your break up. This wasn't just any old, cutesy relationship, you were in love. For the first time you'd actually think and think realistically about possibly spending your life with someone. The two of you planned a future together, and though it terrified you to think about it, at the end of the day you were dating to marry.
Choso's just a neighbor, an attractive neighbor, but...you just weren't sure if it was a good idea to be around him. But even so it wasn't like you could avoid him very well, the dude lives directly across from you.
The morning after was so awkward. The two of you ran into each other in the parking lot, both getting ready to head off and start the day. He always goes to work in the morning, and you like to do work at your favorite cafe just a few minutes from the apartment.
Neither of you seemed sure about what to say to each other, so you just opted for a simple smile and wave.
The entire day you tried to just get your mind off of both guys, yet it didn't go very well.
One hour you'd be crying angrily over your piece of crap ex boyfriend in the public bathroom stall, then you'd be getting those random flashbacks to being with Choso, stomach flipping and heart fluttering.
By the end of the day you couldn't take it. Weighing the pros and cons, you figured you'd might as well just try one date, and if things don't go well then that's that.
It's nearly eleven p.m., around the time you knew Choso gets back to his apartment from his workout. You'd timed it perfectly, rushing over to your front door and poking your head out. There he was in his gym clothes, a black compression shirt paired with dark grey sweatpants. His hair was up in his usual hairstyle, those cute spiky looking buns that really matches with his overall vibe.
"Choso!" You call out to him just before he could turn the doorknob.
Instantly he stops, turning back towards you with his brows raised in surprise. "H-hey."
"I'm really sorry I never called or texted you, I just had to think. But-..but I wouldn't mind going on a date with you. I wanna get to know you more too." You admit, cheeks heating up with slight embarrassment.
For a moment he doesn't say anything, making your heart sink to your feet, worried that maybe he'd moved on from you already. "Am I..too late?"
"No not at all! I was just surprised. I honestly thought you didn't want to go out with me." He chuckles nervously, brushing a hand over the back of his neck.
"No I do! I definitely do." You giggle.
"Are you free Friday night? I could pick you up at seven?" He suggests with a soft tone.
"Yeah, that's perfect! Should I dress pretty nice or...-
"You always dress nice, don't worry about it." He compliments flirtatiously.
"I'll see you then."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Friday Evening
The two of you stand there outside of your respective homes, eyes trailing over each other.
Choso looks...gorgeous. He's got his hair out from his usual style, down and brushed back out of his face. His outfit is a black, slightly ripped sweater, the neckline hanging low enough to show his prominent collarbones, paired with black cargo pants. A silver chain hang around his neck, along with two rings on each pointer and ring finger on both hands.
Your outfits were polar opposites, you being more of a bright color lover since it pops so well against your skin.
You were wearing a light blue, form fitting midi dress, your hair in a simple updo with drop earrings. A pair of white heels, and a silver sparkly purse completed your look.
"You look beautiful." He states softly, closing the door to his apartment.
"Thank you, you look really nice yourself." You compliment with a bashful laugh.
💎
Choso ended up taking you out to a fairly nice Italian restaurant further into the city, with dim lighting, and top notch servers.
It was a pleasant surprise how easy he was to talk to, you could go on and on about anything and everything with each other, and he loved to ask you questions about yourself. It almost made you feel bad as sometimes it seemed it was mostly you sharing things about yourself. It was sweet though, as it showed just how eager he was to get to know you.
You learned he's an eldest brother, with a younger sibling named Yuji who likes to comes to visit him every now and then. It didn't take long to realize he's a very family-oriented kind of guy, but it made sense with his overall personality. The guy's so compassionate and thoughtful, of course he'd be the family first type. You loved it about him though, he talked about his brother like he was his entire world.
The night had gone by just a bit too fast in your opinion, even though you guys were at that restaurant for nearly two hours, then spent another three just leisurely walking around the city afterwards.
There wasn't a single moment with Choso that you didn't like, and he was such a gentleman. He never let you walk around without your arm linked with his, and he made sure you were always walking on the inside of every sidewalk. It was disappointing when you both came back to the apartment building, if you could, you'd just stay out with him talking the entire night.
"I really had a lot of fun with you, Choso. If you want, I-..I'd definitely be down to do this again." You suggest shyly, eyes looking down at your hands clasping around your little sparkly purse.
"Me too, and I would." He smiles cutely. You look up at him, relief and excitement flashing across your face. "Goodnight." He murmurs, leaning down and planting a soft kiss on your cheek. Your heart fluttered wildly in your chest, cheeks heating up at the sweet gesture. He gives you one last smile before reaching for his keys, unlocking his apartment and heading inside.
You're frozen in the corridor chewing the inside of your cheek as you inwardly debate your uncharacteristically bold next move.
"W-wait!" You mutter abruptly, grabbing his free hand just before he left out of sight.
"I-...would you wanna...come over?" You ask shyly. You couldn't even look up at him you were so nervous, hoping you weren't coming across thirsty.
Choso's brows raise slightly in surprise. "Yeah. Sure, I'd love to."
You let out a breath you didn't even realize you were holding, smiling wide in excitement as you go into your purse and grab your keys.
1 Hour Later
Choso's large hands glide down to your upper back, pressing you further into the mattress as he pounds into you from behind. Tears quickly form in the corner's of your eyes, gripping the sheets with everything you have.
"Ch-choso! Fuuuck!" You wail loudly, feeling your body start shaking all over again. One thing about sex with Choso is he'll have you losing count of how many times you cum for sure. He's like an orgasm addict, building you up and watching you fall apart on him over and over.
"Cum for me pretty baby." He coos lowly, watching those cute little tears of ecstasy stream down your cheeks.
"Aaaah! Ah!" Your whimpers mix perfectly with the sounds of your sloppy wet pussy coating his length with yet another layer of cum.
"That's it, there it is." He groans, keeping his strokes steady and precise.
You're so fucked out at this point your mind is completely fogged. This position he has you in doesn't make it any easier, completely at the mercy of his skillful, long thrusts, reaching so deep inside you.
"You feel so gooood! Oh my god!" You cry, loving the way his hips snap into yours. For the entire night your ex was long gone as if he never even existed. The only clear thing your mind could focus on was Choso and Choso only.
"Uhhuh, you love this dick, baby?" He murmurs lowly.
"I love it! I love it!" You repeat over and over desperately between your whimpers and cries.
It was already too much, and you were surprised you hadn't tapped out by now, pleading for him to stop. But you couldn't get enough, not nearly enough. So you took everything he graciously gave to you.
Choso slows his thrusts down just a bit, wanting to savor every inch of him that drags back and forth in your tight, slippery walls. "This pussy's so good. I can't stop fucking you." He purrs sensually.
And he stood on that too...
He gave you back shots as long as he wanted, just to pull out and fuck you with his tongue, making you cum on it before he slides his big dick right back inside.
Somehow tonight was even better than the first time with him, and now that he's learned what you like he uses every little technique, determined on mastering it.
"I like you baby; wanna be yours." He admits softly. He's got a tight hold on your hips, laid out on your stomach as he drives his thick length into you. You let out a long, drawn out moan in response, way too overstimulated to form words anymore.
Choso knew you weren't fully aware of just how much he likes you. He knew you didn't click to the way he's always looked at you. To be honest, he always felt like he was better than your ex, he knew he could do so much better. He wants to show you what it's really like to be loved by someone, and now that he has a chance he damn sure wasn't about to go and waste it.
He's gonna pursue you, take you out on as many dates as he needs to, kiss and fuck you with everything he has, all so it's crystal clear that he wants to be more than just your sweet little neighbor across the way.
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hyperfixationstati0n · 10 months
Text
Just the Beginning
An: This deadass came to me in a dream. That's all I just needed to say that.
Pairing: Spencer x BAU!gn!reader
Content warnings: Its slow burn if you read it slow enough, literally just all fluff as usual
Word count: 1725
Summary: You and Spencer both have feelings for each other, but you're both avoiding it. One rainy day at the BAU changes all of that.
It was late. Later than usual. So late, that it was just you and Spencer left in the bullpen. You had both finished work hours ago, but you secretly wouldn’t admit it to the other so you could keep talking. At the moment, it was just comfortable silence. Which it usually was. Your desks are situated across from each other, Spencer fidgeting with a piece of paper and you clicking your pen rhythmically. 
You had only been at the BAU for a few months, and in those few months, you managed to break Spencer Reid out of his shell. He actually seemed calm around you, which shocked even him. He had become secluded and didn’t always take well to new people. But he liked you. These days, he never seems to get any peace. Except when he was around you.
But he would never admit that. 
As for you, you couldn’t help but feel drawn to him the moment you sat across from him. Sure, at first he was quiet and rarely acknowledged you outside of when you were working on a case, but there was just something about him that caused you to want to strike up a conversation. Every day. It started out as a simple ‘Hello’ every morning, but eventually developed into small talk, which eventually developed into full-blown conversations. He opened up to you about his issues, he came to you when he was anxious. He felt safe around you, and you felt safe around him. The only times you ever felt truly at peace were around him.
But you would never admit that. 
So that’s what led to the two of you being alone in the bullpen long after everyone had left. You were both in search of some peace. It was an unspoken understanding between the two of you. You were both staring out one of the windows, rain panging against it and creating a relaxing beat for the two of you. It seemed like forever before one of you spoke, and it happened to be Spencer.
“It’s really pouring out there,” Spencer says in a soft voice, almost speaking more to himself than to you. But you nod in agreement.
“Yeah…it is.” You whisper, tapping your pen against your desk. “I actually like the rain.” The last comment was almost an afterthought. You always felt like you didn’t have to think before you spoke around him. You could just speak freely and be yourself.
He turns his head towards you, and you can tell he’s smiling even though you’re still looking out at the falling rain. 
“Yeah…I know what you mean. It's relaxing to hear it from the inside.” For once he doesn’t have a statistic or a fact to go along with it. Just softly speaking his mind. That's one of the things you loved about him.
You nod and smile a little. You hear his foot tapping on the floor, a telltale sign he had something on his mind. Before you could even ask what was wrong, he starts speaking. His voice was even softer than before, almost like he was scared someone else would hear, even though it was just the two of you.
“You…make me feel normal. I never really feel normal.” He pauses and looks up at you. “Do you know what I mean?” 
You smile softly and finally turn your head to look at him. “Yeah. I know what you mean.”
A few more minutes of silence. Your pen clicking. His foot tapping. The rain against the window. It was a melody of noises that somehow was relaxing. Yet you couldn't help but feel the pit in your stomach growing. It was like butterflies but worse. You knew the feeling but tried to play it off.
You couldn’t be falling for him…right?
When you look over at him staring out the window and your heart immediately starts beating a little faster, you know it's time to go. You couldn’t be around him anymore because you might admit something you’d regret. You slowly start to pack up your things and only acknowledge it when he notices and looks at you, with what you can only describe as the biggest doe eyes you'd ever seen.
“I should head home…” You say softly, gripping the strap of your bag. He looks a little disappointed at the suddenness but also understands. 
“Do you want me to walk you to your car?” He asks, beginning to stand. It was part of the routine you both had. But tonight…you couldn’t. You needed to be away from him. You didn’t want to hurt him. Or worse, you didn’t want to lose him. You slowly shake your head, trying to hide the obvious anxiousness on your face.
“I’m ok…you don’t have to go out there and get all wet.”
He looks sadder this time but nods. You both say goodbye, and you rush out the door. You don’t stop rushing until you're in your car, having just narrowly avoided getting soaked. But you don’t start your car. You just sit there gripping the steering wheel, almost willing the car to start driving home by itself.
Why did you have to like him so much? Why did he have to be so kind and amazing and perfect? 
You lay your forehead against the steering wheel, just trying to get your mind in order enough to stop freaking out and get the hell home. Yet, as much as you rushed to get away from him, all you wanted to do was walk back into that building and sit next to him. At the end of the day, he was still your best friend, and you just wanted to talk to him without having the overwhelming feeling of butterflies in your stomach.
You were just about to start your car when you heard someone calling your name. You look around, confused when your eyes meet a very wet Spencer walking toward your car. You immediately grab your jacket and hold it over your head, although it doesn’t do much to protect you from the torrential downpour falling down on both of you. You start to walk over to him, shivering in the cold as your blouse gets doused in rain.
“Spencer, what the hell are you doing out here? Are you ok?” You yell to him, walking until you’re only a foot apart.
“I saw your car still here after a few minutes…and I need to talk to you.” He looks nervous. Really nervous. His whole body seemed to be shaking-although you were sure that was mostly due to the weather.
“What is it?” You’re mostly concerned. What could be so important was that he ran out to catch you before you left, getting drenched in the process.
He pauses. For a long time. You almost ask again, to see if he had heard you, but he looks straight into your eyes. That shuts you up really fast. He seems to be struggling with what he wants to say. But his eyes were glued to you like you were the most important thing in the world, so he had your attention.
“I think I’m falling in love with you.” He blurts out. Your jaw drops. There was no way he had just said that. Your heart is racing, the butterflies that caused you to leave now back tenfold. Your brain short-circuited trying to form a response. You had to speak fast, you were worried he would disappear in front of you if you didn’t confirm your feelings.
“Are you serious?” You had to confirm what you just heard. He looks back at you, nodding quickly.
“I probably seem insane, coming out here in all this rain. I know it could’ve waited until tomorrow or I could’ve called you. But I couldn’t. As soon as you left I knew I had to tell you. I just…I couldn’t wait for another second. And when I saw your car was still here…” He trails off mid-ramble. “Yes. I’m serious.”
You take that all in. It was a lot. But it was also exactly what you wanted to hear.
“Spencer…I feel the same way.” Your voice is soft, almost overpowered by the rain. You completely give up on your jacket, dropping it to your side to get closer to him. He looked overjoyed and relieved.
“Can I please kiss you?” He says, the smile evident in his voice. He carefully places his hands on your face, swiping away the rain. 
You nod, and he crashes your lips together in a mind-melting kiss. It was slow, romantic, everything you had ever imagined.
It was also very wet. But that part didn’t exactly matter to either of you.
You both break away, the chill of the air not as bad now that your bodies were pressed together. He looks into your eyes as if you were the only person in the world. And maybe to him, at that moment, you were. The moment doesn’t last as long as you both would’ve liked, the sudden realization that you were standing in the middle of the BAU parking lot, completely soaked taking over instead.
“Get in the car!” You yell with a laugh. You both run into your car, dripping water all over the seats. You’d hate yourself for that later. Right now, it was just you and him, in the dryness of your car. It hits you all that just happened, and you look at him.
“Did we just-?”
“Yeah…I think so.” He says with a smile, running a hand through his hair, slicking it back in a way that makes your heart flutter at the sight. 
“What do we do now?” You ask softly, your mind spinning yet again but now with a completely another set of problems-the biggest one being that you were both cold and wet and in your car. As usual, he reads your mind.
“Why don’t we start with getting dry…we’re probably ruining your car seats.”
You nod, smiling. You couldn’t stop smiling. You finally start your car, the heat blasting on and providing the both of you with some much-needed warmth. You look into his eyes, and there seems to be a new unspoken understanding between the two of you. This was just the beginning, and it would get a lot better from here. 
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