#i almost started crying in the goodwill

[purbiworl]

aaaaauuugh. Well, it's fixed but turns out Latitude 5590 headphone jack audio just sounds like garbage by default. If you want to sound like you're listening to music in a drainage pipe, get a 5590.

[bipaulinadlm]

successfully resisted buying not one but two pieces of clothing that were way too big for me but reminded me of manuel today

[chosok-amo]

heyy can you write something about megumi x fem reader who’s struggling with social anxiety and he’s the only who understands her and tries to help her even if he’s really introverted, something really fluff and a bit romantic. thank u so muchhh

ᨳ A SAFE HARBOR : MEG. FUSHIGURO!

megumi fushiguro . . . after the Goodwill Event, Satoru Gojo takes his students to a festival near Shibuya. Overwhelmed by social anxiety amidst the bustling crowd, lucky for you Megumi was there to help.

The vibrant lights of the festival cast a warm glow over the bustling streets, and the sounds of laughter, chatter, and music filled the air. Colorful stalls lined the paths, offering an array of delicious foods, games, and trinkets. Among the crowd were students from Jujutsu High, led by their ever-enthusiastic teacher, Satoru Gojo.

As you arrived at the festival with your classmates, your heart began to beat faster. The sheer number of people, the overwhelming noise, and the constant motion were almost too much to handle. You felt a lump form in your throat as you took in the scene, your anxiety rising with every step.

Gojo, noticing your hesitation, gave you a reassuring smile. “Alright, everyone! Let's stick together and have some fun!” he announced, his voice carrying over the noise. His enthusiasm was infectious, but it did little to quell the storm brewing inside you. “But remember, if anyone needs a break, just let me know.”

You clutched the strap of your bag tightly, trying to ground yourself. The vibrant colors and enticing aromas that should have been exciting only added to your sensory overload. Your breathing became shallow, and you fought to keep your composure.

Gojo's tall figure led the group through the crowd, his white hair and blindfold making him easy to spot. Around you, your classmates seemed to be enjoying themselves, their laughter and chatter blending into the chaotic symphony of the festival. You tried to stay close to them, hoping their presence would offer some comfort, but it was becoming increasingly difficult to keep your anxiety at bay.

As you all made your way to the long path of stalls, the lively bickering among your friends provided a welcome distraction from your anxiety. Maki, Panda, Toge, Nobara, and Yuji were engaged in a spirited debate about the festival attractions. Maki, always direct, started. “All right, let’s be real. The games here are rigged. You'd have better luck getting a date with Gojo than winning one of those giant stuffed animals.”

Panda chuckled, “Come on, Maki. They're not all rigged. You just have to know the tricks. Right, Toge?” Its fluffy arm nudges the much shorter boy besides, almost knocking the boy over. Toge, always the man of few words, simply nodded and said, “Salmon.”

Yuji, ever the optimist, wasn't convinced. “I don't know, Maki. I think with enough tries, anyone can win. I’m definitely getting one of those giant bears tonight.” Nobara snorted hearing the optimism lingering in Yuji's voice. “Yuji, you couldn’t win a goldfish in a barrel. Let alone a giant stuffed bear. You’re just gonna waste all your money,” she laughed while rolling her eyes, clearly dismissing the Sukuna's vessel nonchalantly.

Yuji pouted. “That’s not fair! Besides, I'm not the only one who wants to try the games. Right, Toge?” Toge grinned and gave a thumbs-up, “Tuna mayo.” The poor boy is only doing something his friends want to hear, and can't be bothered by his friends' nonsense. Maki crossed her arms. “Fine, but when you all lose, don’t come crying to me. I’ll be over at the food stalls, getting something actually worth my time.”

Panda’s eyes lit up, “Speaking of food, did you guys hear about the teriyaki stall? They have a special filling tonight. We have to check it out.” Nobara perked up on the other hand. “Taiyaki?” She asked, sounding interested, “Now that sounds worth it. We can hit the food stalls and then laugh at Yuji trying to win something.” Yuji grumbled, his brown irises rolling in annoyed, “Hey, I’m standing right here, you know.” Maki glanced at the pink-haired boy, a smirk visible on his lips, “We know, Yuji. That’s what makes it so fun.”

Megumi listened to his classmates' spirited conversation about the rigged games and the allure of food. He remained silent, watching the back-and-forth banter between Yuji and Maki, Toge and Panda, and Nobara with mild amusement as the conversation turned to the festival attractions, he remained silent, taking in their different opinions and ideas.

But his mind wasn’t solely focused on their words. He was keenly aware of you standing nearby, the tension in your body language not going unnoticed by him. He noted your evident anxiety, your grip on your bag, and your shallow breathing. Despite his usual nonchalant demeanor, he couldn’t help but worry about you.

He continued to observe you from the corner of his eye as the group continued down the long path of stalls, not quite ready to speak up just yet. Megumi knew that you were likely struggling to keep it together. He felt a pang of concern and wanted to ask if you were alright, but he also knew that drawing attention to your anxiety might only make it worse.

Maki raised an eyebrow, her competitive spirit ignited by the challenge. “Oh, you think you've got me figured out, huh? Well, alright, I'm game. What's the wager, my dear friend?” Panda chimed in, a mischievous glint in his eyes. “How about this, Maki? If you manage to win one of those giant stuffed animals, we'll treat you to a whole day of pampering. Massages, facials, the works!”

Nobara chuckled, adding her own twist to the wager. “But, if you fail to conquer the games, you'll have to wear a ridiculous costume of our choosing for the rest of the festival. And trust me, Maki, we've got some seriously outrageous ideas up our sleeves, right, y/n?” You flinched slightly at the unexpected weight of Nobara's arm around yours, but you managed to keep your reaction minimal.

“Um... I guess so,” you mumbled, not really feeling up to the idea of making a wager yourself. As Nobara's arm looped around yours, you could feel your heart racing. You tried to maintain your composure, forcing a shaky smile in response to her question.

Megumi noticed your lack of enthusiasm and the way you shrank slightly under Nobara's arm. He remained quiet, still observing you with a mixture of concern and curiosity. Maki's competitive grin widened. “You're on, my friends! Prepare to witness greatness as I conquer those rigged games with style. And just remember, when I emerge victorious, your wallets will feel the sting of treating me like the queen that I am!”

Yuji, ever the peacemaker, interjected with a laugh. “Hold on, guys! How about we make it more interesting? If Maki wins, we'll also have to carry all her winnings for the rest of the festival. And if she loses, she'll treat us to a feast at the fanciest restaurant in town!” Toge, breaking his silence, gave a sly nod of agreement. “Octopus dumplings.”

Maki's eyes sparkled with determination. “Deal! Get ready to witness the triumph of the century. I'll show you all what it means to have luck and skill on your side!” And with that, the group set off towards the games, anticipation hanging in the air as they prepared for a friendly battle of wits, luck, and plenty of laughter along the way.

As the group made their way through the crowd towards the game stalls, the conversation continued. Yuji was excitedly discussing food, while Maki bragged about her gaming skills. Megumi remained largely silent, listening more than he spoke, his focus partly on you. He observed the way your shoulders tensed as the noise continued to grow louder. He noticed the way your eyes darted around the crowd, taking in the sights, sounds, and people all around you.

As the group made their way towards the games, you couldn't help but feel even more anxious. The thought of participating in the friendly competition did not appeal to you at all. You tried to maintain your composure, but the sight of the various game stalls and the increasing noise of the crowd were making it difficult to keep your anxiety at bay.

Megumi walked silently beside you, occasionally glancing at you, his expression still calm and neutral. He could sense your discomfort and unease, which was only heightened by the boisterous banter and challenges among your classmates.

“Fushiguro, lend me a hand in bringing Maki down! I can't let her waste my hard-earned cash on this ridiculous game!” Yuji called out to his spike-haired comrade. Megumi, however, politely declined. “I'll pass, I need to grab something from Gojo-sensei,” he said, turning his attention towards you. “Y/n, would you like to come with me? I don't think I can handle it on my own,” he asked, his expression calm and reassuring.

You tilted your head, a mix of confusion and concern evident on your face as you looked up at Megumi. His tranquil blue eyes conveyed a sense of reassurance, making you believe that everything would be alright. “Y-yeah,” you stammered, nodding in agreement. Without waiting for a response from his friends, Megumi took your hand in his and held it tightly, gently leading you away from the bustling crowd.

Megumi's grip on your hand was firm yet gentle as he led you through the maze of the festival. It was a subtle gesture of comfort and reassurance, something you desperately needed in the midst of the overwhelming noises and sights. He guided you away from the boisterous group, his presence seemed to create a small bubble of calm around you.

As you walked, your gaze remained fixed on the ground, consciously avoiding eye contact and occasionally bumping into people. Struggling to keep up with Megumi's pace, you desperately tried to match his stride. You walked, Megumi's eyes glanced repeatedly at you, noting your downcast gaze and the way you kept your distance from him. It was obvious to anyone that you were struggling to cope with the overstimulation around you. As you stumbled slightly, clearly straining to keep up with his pace, Megumi made a decision to pull you closer to himself.

“Come here,” Megumi murmured softly, his arm slipping around your waist and pulling you closer until your chest lightly brushed against his side. He looked down at you with a gentle gaze . . soft even, he could sense the anxiety welling up within you. concerned about your well-being. “Is this alright for you?” he asked, concern lacing his words.

You swallowed hard, attempting to contain your anxiety and nervousness, as they threatened to escape their confines. With a quiet nod, you whispered, “Yeah,” and mustered the courage to look up at him. “I'll stay close, okay?” Once again, you nodded, your hand clutching a handful of his uniform as he resumed his walk, enveloping you under his protective arm.

Megumi's protective arm and strong frame brought a sense of security to you. The contact felt unfamiliar yet simultaneously soothing, especially considering he was not one for physical displays of affection. He could see your anxiety and unease written all over your face, but he remained calm and composed.

As he walked, he instinctively adjusted his pace and gait, syncing them with yours to match your strides. He observed you from the corner of his eyes, making sure you weren't overwhelmed by the environment around you. Megumi observed you closely, noticing the way your eyes darted back and forth, avoiding direct contact. Your body seemed tense, almost as if it was prepared to flee at any moment. He could feel the tightness in your muscles through the sleeve of his uniform.

He walked slowly, making sure to match your pace and occasionally checking on you from the corner of his eyes. The further you moved away from the lively commotion, the more relaxed you seemed to feel, and the vice-like grip you had on his uniform softened slightly. “Are you... okay?” he asked again, his voice a low murmur meant for your ears only. His hand gently squeezed your waist, a subtle gesture of reassurance.

As Megumi's voice cut through the low hum of the festival, you looked up at him, your eyes slightly wider than usual. The subtle squeeze of your waist startled you, and you took a moment to let your mind register his question. You couldn't help but feel a pang of vulnerability. Your heart fluttered for a moment, but you quickly composed yourself and nodded. “Y-yeah,” you whispered, still holding onto his uniform.

Once you both escaped the clamor of the bustling festival, Megumi guided you to a bench nestled beside a majestic tree, offering a breathtaking view of the city below. His gentle gaze remained fixed on you as he asked, “Will you wait for me?” He made it clear that he wouldn't leave unless you wanted him to. However, you nodded in reassurance, prompting him to nod as well before he slowly departed, leaving you to enjoy a moment of solitude.

You released a sigh of relief, your eyes soaking in the sight of the cityscape, where soft flickering lights danced in the distance. The gentle breeze caressed your face and swayed your hair, creating a serene atmosphere. As you relished in the momentary solitude, your heart rate gradually eased, and the tightness in your chest slightly lifted. Before long, Megumi returned, clutching a bottle of water in one hand and a handful of candies in the other, your eyes darted to the sight of him. He settled next to you, his presence bringing a sense of comfort. “Here, have this,” he said, settling down beside you and offering the water first.

You accepted the water bottle, still trying to regain your composure. As you took a sip, the refreshing liquid helped to soothe your parched throat and clear your head. You glanced at Megumi, noticing the candy in his other hand. “What are the candies for?” you asked, your voice a bit raspy from the anxiety-induced dryness in your mouth.

Megumi's expression faltered, his face reflecting a mix of confusion and uncertainty. “I... I don't know,“ he murmured, shaking his head with a small chuckle as you joined in. “But here,” he continued, offering you the candy, “I think this might make you feel better.”

You couldn't help a small smile as you noticed the slight confusion on his face. It was out of character for him to do something without a clear reason, and the fact that he admitted he didn't know why he bought the candies struck you as endearing.

Taking the candy from his hand, you examined it for a moment before popping it into your mouth. The sweetness of the candy combined with the gesture of his thoughtfulness made you feel more relaxed than before. “Thanks, Megumi,” you said quietly, grateful for his thoughtfulness. “You always know how to make me feel better.”

Megumi's stoic facade softened at your words. A hint of a smile tugged at the corners of his lips, and a slight tinge of pink dusted his cheeks. “You don't need to thank me,” he replied, his voice gentle. “I just... I want you to feel better. It doesn't sit right with me when you're...” He hesitated for a moment, as if searching for the right words. “When you're not okay.”

“Beside..” he mumbled, a hint of teasing in his voice. “I can't have you being anxious the entire night. It wouldn't be much of a festival then, would it?” You chuckled softly, feeling some of the tension ease out of your body. His attempt at humor, subtle as it was, was appreciated. “You're right,” you said, a hint of a smile playing on your lips. “I suppose I wouldn't be the best company if I was constantly on edge the entire night.” His hand instinctively reached for yours, his fingers intertwining with yours unconsciously.

You looked at his hand intertwined with yours, the physical contact feeling comforting and reassuring. a small smile forming on your lips. “I promise I'll try not to let my anxiety ruin the night.” Megumi's voice softened as he gently protested, his hand reaching out to pull you closer by your shoulder until there was no distance left between you two. “Hey, don't say that,” he murmured, his touch warm and comforting. “You know it's not your fault. It's not something you can control.”

His large hands moved up and down your arm in a soothing gesture, offering reassurance and support. In his embrace, you could feel his genuine care and understanding, a sense of safety enveloping you. Megumi's presence was a comforting balm, reminding you that you were not alone in your struggles.

Your heart skipped a beat as he pulled you closer, bringing you flush against his side. The sudden closeness caught you off guard, but his soothing touch on your arm made you feel more at ease. His words, spoken with a firm yet soothing tone, assured you that he didn't blame you for your anxiety. You felt the heat rising in your cheeks, and you swallowed, trying to find your voice. “I know,” you mumbled, your voice barely above a whisper. “I know I can't help it, but I still can't help feeling frustrated, you know?“ His large hands continued to gently move up and down your arm, each stroke a silent reassurance.

You leaned closer into him, feeling his strength and warmth emanating through the contact. The gentle rhythm of his hand moving up and down on your arm was grounding, helping to ease your racing thoughts and quell the butterflies in your stomach.

Megumi's expression softened as he listened to your words. His hand gently moved from your arm to your waist, pulling you even closer to him. He gave you a small, encouraging squeeze, his gaze never leaving your face. “I know it's frustrating,” he said, his voice soothing and comforting. “But you don't have to carry the burden of feeling guilty. It's not your fault, and the fact that you're trying is more than enough.” His hand continued to move in slow, gentle circles on your waist, the contact providing a sense of grounding comfort.

As Megumi's words sank in, a wave of relief washed over you. His reassurance and understanding were like a soothing balm to your anxiety-stricken mind. You couldn't help but lean a little bit closer to him, seeking more of the comfort he was offering. “Thank you,” you whispered, your voice softer than before. “For understanding. For being so . . accepting.” His hand on your waist resumed its gentle rubbing, a silent reassurance that he was there, present and supportive.

Megumi's grip on your waist tightened ever so slightly at your words, his gaze softening even further. The small action spoke volumes, conveying a silent message of reassurance and support. “You don't have to thank me for that,” he muttered, his voice gentle yet firm. “It's the least I can do.”

He shifted, bringing himself closer to you, closing any remaining distance between your bodies. The familiar scent of his cologne and the warmth of his body against yours were grounding, pulling you further from your anxious thoughts.

A peaceful silence settled between the two of you as you both admired the sprawling cityscape before you. Your eyes momentarily drifted down to your hands, intertwined and resting gently on Megumi's thigh. You could feel the comforting sensation of his thumb caressing your hand, creating a tender connection between you.

A playful smile danced across your lips as you glanced up at Megumi, teasingly remarking, “You seem awfully touchy tonight.” Your gaze met his, curiosity sparkling in your eyes, eager to hear his response.

Megumi's hand stilled on yours, paused mid-motion. For a brief moment, he was taken aback by your comment. His facial expression betrayed a hint of surprise, but it was quickly masked with a subtle smirk tugging at the corner of his lips. Megumi's head tilted slightly to the head. His hand, still intertwined with yours, still on his thigh, gave a playful squeeze.

“Touchy, huh?” he retorted, his voice laced with a teasing tone. He shifted his position slightly, angling himself to face you more directly. “Is that a complaint?” His thumb continued to caress the back of your hand, the gentle touch simultaneously comforting and electrifying. You tilted your head, a sly grin forming on your lips. “A complaint? Hardly. If I wanted to complain, you'd know. Consider this a friendly reminder to keep up the good work.”

You gently squeezed his hand back, your eyes sparkling with mischief. “But hey, if you need reassurance, I can always provide some pointers.”

Megumi's smirk widened into a genuine smile at your playful response. The banter between you felt natural and comfortable, the ease of conversation a testament to the years of friendship and familiarity that lay between you. “Oh, is that so?” he replied, his voice laced with a hint of challenge. “And here I thought I was doing just fine on my own.” He shifted again, his grip on your hand tightening ever so lightly, his thumb still caressing your skin in slow, soothing circles. “But... I suppose I could always use some pointers from an expert like yourself.”

You arched an eyebrow, a smirk playing on your lips. “An expert, huh? Well, it's good to see you finally recognizing talent when you see it.” You leaned in slightly, your voice taking on a playful tone. “But don't worry, Megumi. With my guidance, you'll be a pro in no time.” You gave his hand a playful squeeze. “Just try to keep up, alright?”

Megumi chuckled, his expression a mix of amusement and challenge. “Oh, I'll keep up, alright,” he said, his voice carrying a hint of determination. He matched your lean, bringing his face slightly closer to yours. His gaze dropped to your intertwined hands for a moment before returning to your eyes, a spark of playful rivalry lighting his gaze. “You better be prepared to put your money where your mouth is,” he teased, his grip on your hand tightening almost imperceptibly.

[catsfor2]

hit me, part 2

wc: 2.5k, largely unedited warnings: swearing/language, talk of homophobia, physical injury a/n: omg hey. this part takes place directly after part 1. things are starting to happen...!also idk shit about shit so don't come at me for the medical stuff if its wrong :) tags: @elliewilliamsmunch@intrnetdoll@me-and-your-husbandur-husband@3zae-zae3@milahnoz@elliescumm@dragonasflowercrown

part 1

part 1.5

"So...where are we going?"

"It's a clearing. In the woods." Ellie's hands lazily slide around the steering wheel as she speaks. You could daydream while staring at Ellie for hours. It's relaxing to watch her drive.

"Hm. Are you gonna...kill me there? Or something?" You joke.

"Still deciding."

"Oh my—are you seriously still mad?"

She says nothing, pretending to be engaged with driving.

You let out an irked breath.

"Okay—Ellie, I'm sorry. I was wasted out of my mind. And you look really different. Like, not just in your face. Everywhere is different." You confess, fiddling with the stickers peeling off of her dashboard.

"So do you. I still managed to fuckin' figure it out."

"I—I think I almost did? I remember looking at you and feeling really—confused, mostly. I didn't understand why I liked this stranger so much." You say, vaguely remembering how clingy and overt you acted last night.

"You were confused? I was fucking confused," her head swivels to yours. "a lesbian? That's what you are now?"

"Don't—don't say it like that. I came out like everyone else. You just weren't there to hear it."

Ellie lets out a choked laugh.

"Oh, Bullshit."

"Excuse me?"

"I wrote you and called you for fucking months. Nothing. A letter a fucking day. Are you listening? Do you know how many letters that is?"

You stay silent. Your hands ball up where they rest on your lap.

"Fuckin' say something! I even asked Dina for your number but you cut her off too! Is there a reason you basically fucking died?"

"I wasn't home, Ellie."

She stills, her shoulders relaxing a touch. She adjusts back towards the road before clearing her throat.

"At...at sixteen? What happened?"

You recall you, sixteen, sobbing and frantic. Tearing apart the letter Ellie wrote to tell you that she left. Wondering why it felt more like a breakup then your actual one did. Cursing yourself over and over and over again for only being sixteen. Your parents cursing Ellie for corrupting you.

"I feel like you can connect the dots." Your voice is just barely loud enough to hear over the droning tone of the car. The only focus you had at this point was trying not to cry in front of Ellie.

"Oh, fuck, y/n. I'm—I'm sorry. Did those fuckers kick you out?"

"No," you sigh. "I just knew I had leave. They're...crazy. I don't know. I'm fine now."

Her knuckles flex and tense over the steering wheel. Her teeth start to bite at her lips. There's a couple more seconds of quiet before she speaks up.

"I wish I would've been there."

You pause, not totally expecting what she said.

"Yeah," you breathe, gazing at the side of her head. "I wished that too."

And that wasn't a lie. Your family instilled a lot on you, mostly turning you away from religion. But then? You were desperate. Painfully, achingly desperate. And completely alone. After you left home, you prayed every single night. A genuine prayer, on your knees and everything. You even bought a $1.50 pocket bible from goodwill. All to aide in your bedtime routine of begging God to make Ellie come back.

She never did. You've been an atheist ever since. You weren't sure if her being here now changed anything.

The silence marinates for a short while longer until you feel the rocky texture of a gravel road beneath the car.

"We're here," Ellie states, throwing the gear in park. She takes a glance at your feet. "and you should've worn better shoes. We have walking to do."

You both hop out of the car.

"Like you couldn't have told me before we left?" You scoff.

"It's more fun to fuck with you later. C'mon," she grabs your hand, tightly clutching it in hers. "there's coyotes and shit around here. Don't be fuckin' stupid and stay close."

You try to will the warmth away from your cheeks. You've never held Ellie's hand before. Even if this doesn't really count as holding.

"Yeah, got it." You force out.

She leads you into the trees, hand warmly on yours, briskly following a mental path she's clearly walked many times.

"I almost got arrested over here," She sighs, far too casually.

"What?!"

"Damn—I said almost, chill." She assures, laughing at your shock.

You lightly slap her shoulder.

"I don't care! Almost getting arrested is still crazy!" You chide, eyes wide and judgmental.

Ellie's always been pretty...rebellious, but a part of you always thought that she'd be smart enough to avoid anything truly consequential. I guess she still is, you think.

"Lemme explain, ok. I was high as fuck, minding my business, when I saw some kids shootin'—a wolf, I think? Maybe a coyote—I saw them just...fuckin' up this poor thing with a—a BB gun."

"Oh my god..." You say, "What did you do?"

"I didn't do shit at first—I thought they'd stop. But they were like—about to kill this thing, I swear to God. So, I...ha..." Her face breaks into a wide smile. "you're not gonna like this,"

"...What. Not gonna like what."

"I pulled my gun on 'em."

"Ellie!"

"It wasn't even loaded, y'know I like to have it with me just in case..."

"They're kids!—"

"Asshole kids. Ok? And it fuckin' worked so—"

"I thought you said you almost got arrested?"

"Jesus—I did. You keep interrupting me—"

"Sorry." You quip, also realizing you just interrupted her with your apology.

"It's—it's fine. Anyway, those fucks called the cops on me after they ran. I found out cause the fuckin' pigs stopped me and asked if I'd seen an 'armed gunman in the area,'" She says, imitating a deep 'cop' voice. "dumbasses had no clue it was me."

You watch as she laughs, amused at her own story. Suddenly, your foot gets caught under a thick root and your arms fly out in an instant.

Ellie's hands hit your shoulders, grasping them upright, causing you to sharply crash into her chest.

"Oh—shit, sorry. I wasn't watching where I was going." You gasp out, trying to regain your balance while loosening your grip on Ellie's coat.

"No, it's those fuckin' shoes," she rebukes, hands still resting on your shoulders. She immediately takes them off you when she notices. "we're almost there anyway. Try not to kill yourself before then."

Your hand burns at your side, palm itching. Is she going to grab it again?

"Where's 'there'?" You ask, glancing around at the wall of trees and shrubbery encircling you both.

"You'll see. Just stay close." She repeats like before, clutching your hand once again.

You tighten your grip, wanting to show Ellie you're listening.

"Good. Let's move."

The two of you walk for about a mile or so more, before the view steals your eyes and you both freeze.

"Oh—wow, Ellie. This is really pretty," you breathe, entranced by the piercingly vibrant colors and towering mountainous structures.

Her head is turned toward you, taking in your reaction to the sight, instead of the sight itself.

She's must've seen it so many times, you think.

"Yeah, you like it? I knew you would." She tells you, unable to keep the satisfied grin from her face.

"Shut up. I'm still mad you didn't even let me get ready this morning."

"There's nobody here. Who're you fuckin' getting ready for?" She barks, arms wide and gesturing.

I still wanted to get ready for you, Ellie. But obviously you don't say that.

"Whatever. You just did it to be a dick." You mutter, plopping yourself down onto the boulder in front of you.

"Yeah, I did. It's funny when you're mad. You're like a cat." She laughs, sitting down next to you.

"That's toxic. You shouldn't make people mad just cause you find it funny." You chide, crossing your legs over the rock.

"Guess I'm toxic, then." She sighs, carelessly throwing pebbles at your head.

"Was that the plan? Sit on a rock and be mean to me?"

"Truly adorable that you think this is mean—"

"Well it's not nice, that's for sure." You huff.

Ellie shifts so that her body faces yours. Her legs spread out wide, elbows comfortably resting on her thighs.

"I don't think you want me to be nice to you."

Your mouth parts open in surprise, eyes now burning into Ellie's.

"Well that's a lie. I'd love for you to be nice—"

"I think you like when I'm mean to you. I think you...prefer it, actually." She juts, a confident smile forming.

"Yeah, and who told you that, Dina?" You question, crossing your arms as a breeze starts to make you shiver.

"Nobody told me anything." her head quirks to the side. "I can just tell."

It was difficult to keep your composure. There were some things Ellie seemed to know about you that you didn't even know yourself. It was terrifying, embarrassing, and flattering all at once. Your face feels like its melting. You stay silent.

"Oh—am I right? I've totally got you, haven't I?" She asks, enjoying fully the power she seems to have over you and your emotions.

"No." You bite, unwilling to try and say anything else.

You hated how often Ellie was right.

She takes a ball of black fabric from her pocket, tossing it in your lap. It's a hat.

"Put it on. It's cold."

A swarm of bats fly over the both of you, chaotic and eruptive.

"It's gonna be dark, Ellie."

"I know, I know. I was, uh—saving the best for last." She quips, hopping off of the rock to stand in front of you.

It felt kind of awkward this way, Ellie fully standing while you sat. You had to look straight up to meet her eyes. It put your head in whirl.

"What, the tattoo? I saw that already."

"No. Something else," She grabs your hand and places it on the bottom hem of her top. Your heart beats a little faster.

"Lift up my shirt."

Your eyes widen as your hand fidgets. You wait for her to keep talking. She doesn't.

"Um...like all the way?" You struggle to find words. "Or—"

"Lift up," her hand grasps yours, guiding it up. "my shirt."

Fabric shifts and the pale flesh of her abdomen comes into view. Her belly is lean—all hard edges and dense muscle. What catches your eye is the long, winding, angry scar tracing along her hip.

Your brain goes into overdrive.

Traumatic injury, surgery needed... most likely...flexor or... IT band tendonitis? Maybe, what, Bursitis? Something...invasive—a tear? Labral tear? Iliopsoas tear? What the fuck was she doing?

"Street fighting." She states. "It's my job."

Your face is blank. You shakily stand.

"Uhhh—you, you better be fucking with me, Ellie." You stutter out. Unconsciously, you move to trace your finger along the scar, feeling the warped, healed skin. "I mean this is...this is serious. This is...surgery."

"Don't I fuckin' know it," she moves her shirt back down, covering the scar. "took me out of the ring for like, eight weeks."

"Jesus—Jesus Christ. How long have you been doing this!?"

"Not much longer than you've been in school, really."

"So, not long. Is what you're saying." your fingers rake through your hair. "This is...this is fucking crazy."

"It's not that—"

"Dina's okay with this? Really. I really don't see how she could be okay with this, like, at all." You argue, cutting her off.

"She wasn't. I had to convince her."

"And how often do you go to the doctor? Once a week? Or do you pretend like you know how to patch yourself up?"

Her face slightly reddens.

"I—I learned how to do it myself. I know how."

"Oh sure. Did you google it? I'm sure google will save you from a life threatening injury."

"Ok, most of them are not 'life threatening'—"

"You don't know that! Not certainly, at least! Not certain enough to be safe!" You exclaim, voice full of anger, but mostly, fear.

She places a hand on your shoulder, gripping it tightly. She doesn't talk until you meet her eyes.

"Hey. I am fine. The hip thing was a fluke. Honest. Most of the time nothing fuckin' happens." She assures, her other hand rubbing up and down your arm. You must've looked more upset than you'd realized.

"Ok."

"Just, 'ok'? Are we...good now?" Ellie asks, blue eyes still deeply connected to yours.

"Um...yeah..." You say, partly hesitating. Ellie watches you closely.

"I wanna go with you."

Her face lights up in...shock?, you think, a pleased grin shaping her mouth.

"What—really?"

"If you really want to do...this," you bite your lip. "being there is what would make me feel...better...about it."

"Yeah? That's...I mean, I think that's great," She says, tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear. "my own cheerleader."

You step backwards, letting Ellie's hands slide away from your body.

"No, not a cheerleader. A fucking medic. So I'm not sitting home worried about you—dying. I can just be there to help if stuff goes wrong."

"I'm happy either way, princess." She gleams.

As the sun sets, it gets harder to make out the shape of her face. The woods are also quieter, amplifying the subtle sounds of you and Ellie. You wonder about the details of your plan.

"Do I have to pay to get in? How does this...work?"

"No, you're set. Pretty girls get in free—it's a club rule. Y'know, good for business and everything."

You thank the sky for it's darkness, as Ellie is unable to see the rosy hue reaching your cheeks.

"Oh. Okay...good to know."

Ellie steps up, and now familiarly, encloses your hand in hers.

"C'mon. It's too fuckin' dark to stay any longer."

You walk out of the clearing, back into the dense foliage of where you came. Your grip tightens.

"So...have you had girlfriend?" Ellie blurts.

"Um, weird question, but," you look away. "no."

"Just...trying to gauge how good of a lesbian you are. Pretty bad, it seems."

"Oh, fuck off. I've been focusing on...school." You retort, fully knowing how lame it sounds.

If you were being honest, it was just nerves. You didn't have to try for a boyfriend, he basically wouldn't even take 'no' for an answer. But with girls? It was like you froze.

"Hey I'd give you some tips but...I don't think they'd really...apply for you, y'know?"

"No, I don't know. Explain it." You demand.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm trying think of a way where it makes...sense. And won't make you mad."

"I won't get mad Ellie. Just say it." You encourage, now more curious than anything.

She stops walking and turns to you.

"Well, it's like...the roles. The roles you can have."

"What...roles...?"

She huffs a laugh before continuing, and positions her hand to point to herself.

"I'm the type that flusters the girl. The...fluster-er, right?"

She walks forwards, getting so close that you can smell the scents of the forest soaked up in her clothing.

"And you," She says, her finger poking your collarbone. "...are the girl that...is flustered. It's a...a dynamic, yeah?"

Your skin heats and all you can do is gaze at Ellie, who's completely enthused with this discussion. She stays quiet, watching your face intently, despite it being so dark.

"You're making stuff up again. I don't even—I don't even know why I let you talk." You utter.

"See? You're doing it already! It's the fuckin' dynamic princess—you know I'm never wrong." She gushes, pinching at your checks and making them even redder.

"This so stupid. And don't call me that."

It was like the world stopped. As soon as you said it, you could see Ellie's brain distinctly remembering you, in that whiny drunken voice, begging. You won't ever forget it. And neither will Ellie, for completely different reasons.

You knew exactly what she was going to say, so you try and stop her.

"Don't. I don't care what I did yesterday. Just—don't."

She sighs, clearly dropping it. Thank god. Her teeth bite the inside of her cheek.

"Whatever you say, princess."

You don't even acknowledge it, just rolling your eyes as you walk ahead. Stray branches brush over your legs and thighs, feeling like gentle scratches. You slow a bit, waiting for Ellie to join you.

And hold your hand again.

Stepping ahead of you to lead, Ellie does just that. The warmth makes you smile, and you let it own your face, bright and wide. You didn't care. It was dark enough.

"Alright. Stay close."

"I know, Ellie."

[cheesus-doodles]

Kazutora moving in with reader?

Kazutora is beaten up after a particularly bad fight with his dad, he runs off somewhere alone, reader finds him, he spills his guts about his home life, and reader just decides he's moving in with her. Kazutora, while surprised, isn't complaining. Maybe uses not being used to a safe and stable home environment to get as much TLC from the reader as possible.

And yan!platonic!toman's reaction to finding out? Sure they see reader all the time and she makes lunch boxes for them, but Kazutora never has to say goodbye at the end of the day? Gets breakfast, lunch, dinner and dessert from her? Unlimited cuddles and alone time? Sleeping in the same bed? Being the first thing he sees every morning? It's like they're a married couple!

Kazutora's planning their future wedding while Mikey's throwing the fit to end all fits.

dkjfnsfsdjnfkljsnfjlskdn i love this ahhhhh took my breath away when i saw it come in :') softness...been a hot minute since i got this but i hope yall like it! been pretty sick these two weeks, apologies for the silence (psa: this is not edited, will edit when I wake tmr zzzz)

‎‎

A Relief from the Rain

Yandere Platonic Toman

Masterlist

‎‎

Two days.

Two days was all it took for the group's goodwill towards Kazutora to completely collapse despite there being little change to their regular program.

“No! I refuse! I forbid it!”

You simply sighed, combing your fingers through the blond locks of one pouting Tokyo Manji Gang President who you were attempting to calm down, the image of him stomping his foot like a toddler a far cry from the well-feared delinquent that he was. "Come on, Mikey, don't be like that." Even to an outside eye, it was clear that you were well-used to the antiques of your dear friends, with the way you had the fussy boy bundled in your arms and the soothing repetitive movements of your hands through his hair, yet this situation was getting out of hand for you.

As if on cue, your appeals only fell on deaf ears, with Mikey no less upset about the sudden new arrangement that had befallen your home than when the day had started. "No!"

Whimpering, the clutch that Kazutora had on the fabric of your shirt only grew tighter as he buried his face into your back, the feeling of dampness touching your skin once more as the blue and backs that littered his skin had just begun to fade almost seem to glow under your kitchen lights. "I don't want to go home," he whined. "I want to stay here." One look at your face made it clear you thought the same.

There was no doubt that the Toman founders had known what Kazutora was going through at home. Being delinquents themselves with an extensive history of fighting, they certainly could tell when a bruise was from the impact of a hand rather than that of an accidental run-in with the wall; and that would be if they hadn't had the...pleasure of running head first into their friend's sperm donor.

The boys understood. Really. None of them came from what society would deem conventional families, and even if they didn't live through the hell that was domestic abuse, they could sympathize.

A clack as Baji all but gritted his teeth in a bid to keep his trap shut, Draken's arms shaking with the force of his grip on his shirt in an attempt to not just rip the injured Kazutora off of you and hurl him through a window. They understood, but when it came to you and your very limited and carefully allocated time, any sympathy they had went straight out the window.

But no matter their aggravation, you didn't seem keen on giving in; not after the state that you had found your friend in, and definitely not after you had found out what he (and to an extent, the rest of your Toman friends) had been hiding from you.

‎

‎

“Tory? Is that you?”

Your voice cut through the cacophony of rain pattering down the narrow side alley. It had been a miserable Thursday afternoon two days ago, gloomy clouds hanging low from the sky. The unusually heavy droplets of water hitting a jumble of metal, brick and concrete surfaces alike on their way back down to earth that had previously drowned out the grating voices in his head now only served to carry your words along the otherwise soulless alley. Combined with the splash of small puddles that had pooled up amidst the flat cement floor as your light footsteps grew closer, the usually comforting, rhythmic sounds only served to churn up his gut further.

“Tory?” Kazutora didn’t respond. There was no hiding his signature gold and black hair, even if it was flattened by the dampness, and it was only clearer and clearer that it was him as you continued to approach. But the boy instead found himself wishing against hope that you would simply leave him alone, turn around and return to whatever it was you had been doing; a first since he had come to know you. 

The shadow of your umbrella shade fell over him. A pause, you seemingly thinking what to say. The world stilled. "Are you alright? Cold?"

A sniffle, a whimper. It was all he could reply with as he shifted to wrap his arms tighten around himself, face pressed firmly into his knees, darkening bruises and bleeding scratches hidden away below the fabric of his drenched clothes, his two black eyes throbbing. The concern in your tone was warm, homely yet heart-wrenching at the same time: the last thing he wanted was for you to see him in a state like this. But he knew you well - and you were one of those just too stubborn to leave without an answer. 

As far as you had been concerned, Kazutora's home life didn't exist. 

Not that it didn't of course, the boy still unfortunately needing somewhere to return to lay his head once the night grew too old should it not be his turn for cuddles at yours. No matter what awaited him behind the dreaded front door to his house, when it came to you, there was nothing for you to know between the moment your friend disappeared off the streets and when he appears once more the next morning, either in the kitchen already making a ruckus or cuddled up as close as he could against you in your bed, fast asleep. 

And Kazutora had been happy for it to stay this way. Lying to you one too many times on where all the bruising on his arms came from and why he had another black eye wasn’t easy to stomach sure, but your pity was something he didn’t mind receiving in heaps. No, this crybaby was happy to thrive off of your generous kindness and your endless affection for your friends. What he didn’t want, however, was to sully those innocent doe eyes with even the mere idea that the world could be so horrid, to dim the spark in your eyes that gave him a reason to face the worst of what life could throw at him. 

But alas, the hand of destiny had a different idea from him, and now here he was, stuck in a situation Kazutora didn't want you to be in. He had always powered through alone, suffering for the light that came the next day with your return to his life. What were you going to think? What could he say?

‎‎

At least you didn’t seem to mind the waiting or the damp. A huff, followed a soft thud accompanied by a splash of water; the telltale audible cues of you sitting down next to him. The rain failed to continue to pelt his wrapped form, most likely shielded by the canopy of your umbrella that you so generously shared with you silent unmoving friend; the soft, calming hum that fell from your lips like it always did was barely audible over nature’s cacophony if Kazutora strained his ears. Content with simply being present and by his side, you didn’t press him for answers, didn’t force him to hurry. Letting him take his time to open up to you.

The storm had started to die down by the time the delinquent finally moved - the first signs of life and response from the unusually silent boy you had received since your arrival in the overlooked alleyway. "Are you going to be mad at me?" The sudden words that punctuated quiet whirl of air-conditioning compressor of units overhead seemed to take even you by surprise.

You blinked. "Mad?" You echoed. "Why would I be mad at you, Tory?"

He hesitated for a moment, before almost shyly lifting his head just enough for you to catch a glimpse of his face. You gasped. Usually unblinking sandy brown eyes were purple-black and swollen shut, with a splatter of sickly yellowish green bruises littering his forehead, as if dealt out in retaliation for protecting his face. What happened? Did he get jumped by a rival gang?

Swallowing hard, it took everything you had to erase the visible anxiety from your expression - it was clear that your friend was in a pretty bad shape. But he never did like you having to worry about him: Kazutora had always been the big, bad delinquent that protected you after all. You took a few deep breaths, waiting till your tone was calm and even before you spoke once more. "Do you need to go to the hospital, Tory?"

It wasn't the right time to ask what happened, not yet, but it was clear that those injuries at least needed a minimum amount of treatment. A pause, and then Kazutora shook his head. You nodded, standing. Brushing did little to clear the dirt from your damp skirt, but you hardly noticed, a bright smile lighting up your face as you offered a hand to your friend. "Then you're coming with me. Come on, let's get you to mine."

‎‎‎

“And so Kazutora’s staying with me for the time being,” you finished. 

Though strange it might be for you to initiate and call your Toman friends to your house as oppose to them turning up uninvited, the five delinquents had been more than happy to answer. What they walked into, however, quickly wiped any trace of cheer from their faces - finding a beaten and bruised Kazutora huddled up with a cup of hot chocolate in your living room told them everything that they already needed to know.

Mikey's eyes went unnervingly empty, his lips dangerously pressed and downturned. "He went another round with you?"

Your eyes slid expectantly down to Kazutora, who only returned a single nod. "Another?" You questioned. There was no doubt that everyone was always on the same page as you - and your friends had already known about this.

"Mikey's dealt with him before," Draken clarified.

To say you had been displeased with what you had learnt would be the understatement of the century. Your normal friendly, calm - human - expression cracked, and the temperature seemed to drop along with your smile. "He hit you before?"

Another pause, and then another quiet nod from Kazutora.

You stood almost robotically, your hand shooting to wrap around the closest weapon to you: the television remote controller clutched in your fingers gleaming menacingly. "Right, Tory, we're going to get your things."

‎‎

‎‎

But that was two days ago. Two days since you had picked up Kazutora from the streets like he was a stray, two days since they had witnessed the downright frightening side of you that the Toman founders would pray never to see again (they didn't even know a remote could used to hurt that way). Two days that they had to endure without even a fraction of the attention that each boy usually got from you, having to watch someone else take that comfort away from them. It didn't matter that Kazutora was one of them - no, now he was the enemy.

Thursday nights were supposed to have been your assigned "alone time", which meant that none of your Toman friends were supposed to be staying over. Yet long after the sun had set and the night was threatening to grow old, after you had already spent the whole day fussing over that wretched mob of duo-colored hair, the rest had to watch, enviously, jealously, as Kazutora followed you upstairs while the rest of them had to leave your home.

And today was already Saturday.

"I'm gonna change your bandage, okay Tory?"

Mitsuya tsked at the whimper you got in response, though the lilac-haired boy was quick to turn his face away when you looked up in confusion. Kazutora was milking your soft heart for everything it's worth, and the other five Toman boys could see through him like paper.

Baji was more direct, hand shooting out to grab onto the sleeve of your shirt, tugging the fabric as pathetically as he could. "I'm hungry," the boy complained, and as if on cue, his stomach grumbled. Planned of course, given he skipped dinner earlier just to get to your house on an empty stomach; knowing that only Kazutora got all three meals home-cooked by you and no one else was a travesty in itself. "Starving."

It was usually enough to get your attention, enough for you to drop everything, yet you were undeterred, opting to give Baji's hair a tussle before returning to your original task. "Give me a minute, okay, Baji? I'll get dinner once I'm done here."

A glance back at Kazutora would reveal his blown eyes, the daydream (or vision, if anyone cared to ask the boy) of a white hall and you dressed in white glittering in those sandy brown eyes for all to see: Kazutora was sure your wedding to him was all but written in stone now. After all, he already got to cuddle with you every night (for one night), to wake up to your peaceful face first thing in the morning, plus food? Look how well you were already treating him, he wanted to crow to the others. It was like you and him were already married.

And the others knew. They knew what he was thinking, and it only wrenched up their annoyance even further. Why couldn't you see through what Kazutora was doing?

‎‎‎

One smirk sent Mikey's way was enough to light the fire.

“I’ll fucking kill you!” Mikey roared, launching himself at Kazutora, only to be caught mid-air by Draken to stop him crashing face-first into you, who had been quick to step between the two boys, your eyebrows pinched together.

"Mikey!"

“But but-” The blond boy pouted, thrusting one finger at Kazutora, who was now cowering behind your delicate form. “He pulled a face at me!”

"He's already hurt!" You insisted, shuffling Kazutora behind you protectively.

It was as if Mikey hadn't heard you at all, his thoughts still clinging on to the sole point that the whole fuss had started. "No! I refuse!"

You looked perplexed, taken aback by the insistence. "No?"

"I forbid it! I want to move in too!"

You blinked, your head instinctively tilting as you looked at the fuming Toman President. "You want to move in? Like into my house?"

"It's not fair that only Kazutora gets to stay here!"

"But you have your own home, Mikey." You placated, but the delinquent was persistent, crossing his arms and stomping again.

"He can take my room, I want to stay here with you!"

"And since Mikey brought it up," Draken continued, cheeky smile now plastered across his face as he set the other back onto the ground. "I'll like to move in too."

"Bastard!" Baji cursed. "I'm moving in too!"

Mitsuya and Pah nodded along, though it was clear that Pah still wasn't quite sure what was going on.

You glanced around at them. "You can't all move in!" You exclaimed, scratching the back of your neck in confusion. "I don't have the room for all of you."

But the stubbornness and persistence that you had once admired of your friends came back to haunt you like a curse, Mikey huffing as he plopped down on your living room floor, sprawling with all four limbs. "I'm not leaving, I don't care. You can't make me."

Baji followed suit in agreement, taking up more space with his spread eagle pose.

"Should I tie myself to the sofa?" Pah wondered out loud, Mitsuya breaking into a laugh at his question.

Not being able to help yourself, your confusion gave way to a giggle as you chuckled at your friends' antics. Ah, you finally got it; you should known better honestly. All this time, their jealousy and envy had been written all across their faces.

"All right, all right, I got your point."

Mikey shot up. "I can move in?"

"No, but-" You held up one finger, interrupting what you knew was another protest starting. "If you boys help to clear out the guest room, Kazutora can stay there instead."

Said boy's vocal disagreement was smothered by the cheers of 'Out!', and you paused to allow them to finish before you continued. "As I was saying, Tory will continue to stay with me until he is recovered and has somewhere to go, but we'll return to our usual schedule." Offering one hand to Mikey, you tousled Kazutora's hair in apology as he clung to you, insisting that he needed cuddles to recover. "Deal?"

The echo of the clap resounded throughout the house.

[blackbat05]

Biggest Supporter

Jason Todd x Library Assistant! Reader

Plot: Your week has been difficult and the emotions start to pile up on you. Luckily, Jason has the perfect plan for a Friday evening self-care.

Genre: PG-13, Comfort

A/N: Wrote this one shot when I should have been sleeping🤡 The week has not been the easiest and you know my style… writing to release the steam. I hope you still enjoy and that it brings some sort of comfort if you’re struggling as well. Reblogs appreciated!

This week was really not it.

You were almost reaching the end of the week, where you could taste the sweetness of a Friday when shit had to hit the fan.

First, the kids weren’t listening to you as you tried to conduct story time. You tried to be assertive and authoritative as possible but frustrating was only the one word out of many that you had at the end of the day.

The next day wasn’t any better as you had to sit through a meeting that left a bitter taste on your tongue. You felt eyes on you as you walked around the campus but tried to keep your head up high.

Then, it happened.

You had to stop an actual physical fight in the library.

Unsuccessfully should be the prerogative word.

Teachers came out of the staff room like bees attracted to honey- or screaming in this case and you had never felt more embarrassed. Still, you had a job to do. Reporting and crowd control.

The aftermath wasn’t pretty. You kept trying to tell yourself that the suggestions were out of goodwill. But it didn’t help when you kept replaying it in your head and they sounded uglier by the second. As if it was directed at you and your incompetence.

It took a lot to squash down your anxiety and insecurity to back where it rightfully belonged. But you were valid to be upset at the injustice you were facing. You wished you had quicker comebacks at the remarks instead of a weak defense that only made you sound like you were just making excuses.

No. You had to be strong, you had to believe that you were doing the right thing all this while. The air felt thick again and you were glad when school ended and you could leave earlier on a Friday.

As you head down the stairs, you see a familiar motorbike parked next to the security guard post and a mop of black hair with a tinge of white.

“Jason!” You waved happily as you reached the bottom.

“Hey princess.” He opens his arms for a hug which you gladly accept. “Looks like I got here in time.”

“You have no idea.” You groan into his chest, earning a chuckle from him.

Waving goodbye to Sam, the friendly guard, the two of you prepare to set off on his bike and straight into the weekend.

The ride was everything you needed. The gust of fresh air was a much welcome reprieve. Suddenly, the emotions from the week start to swell in your chest and you fight the urge to cry by leaning further into Jason’s back.

“Let it out!” Jason yells to make himself heard over the howling wind as you zoom across the expressway. “You’ll feel better!”

So you do. You let your tears run even if it means you’ll probably look like a puffy eyed demon when you reach your destination.

It wasn’t easy, coming to this point of your job. You knew how hard you had to fight for everything that you had achieved so far. You made sure to not make the same mistakes and all was going well.

That is why you absolutely hated the fact that this week had rattled you very badly that it dredged up old wounds.

Blinking away your tears, the bike slows down and you find yourself in front of a Korean Restaurant that you’ve always wanted to visit.

“You’re too good to me.” You thanked Jason, still riding high on all the emotions. But you didn’t care about putting them on display because Jason was the only one who knew and understood what you were feeling.

“I did nothing.” Jason is modest and guides you inside the restaurant, ready for a sumptuous and hearty meal of spicy stew.

As you wait for the pot to boil, Jason looks at you through the rising steam as you recount to him your week. He doesn’t interrupt, making the right reactions at the appropriate times.

“You did everything you could. Don’t be too hard on yourself.” Jason says as you finish. “I wasn’t there but you sounded really badass.” He tries to lift the mood, earning a small smile from you even though you don’t say anything.

Jason frowns. “What did your boss say?”

“She said that it was beyond my control and I did everything that I could.” You sigh. “But maybe they’re right. I have to be stricter than these incidents will stop happening.”

“Then, it’s settled.” Jason is firm. “You’re not at fault. Did you do what Macy did the last time?” He asks, referring to your recent librarian and supervisor who left the job to go to Spain with her family.

“Yeah. I didn’t want to change it too drastically.” You respond and Jason nods as if all this was logical.

“Exactly. You did what she’s supposed to do. You’re continuing what she is doing. And if anyone has any smart-ass opinions, tell them to take it up to management themselves instead of directing their anger at the wrong place.” Jason becomes more heated by the second and you can’t help but to be a little amused by this. You’re grateful for a loyal best friend like him.

“I’m serious! If this happened previously before you came, then it’s not on you.” Jason insists. “And! Where was the help when you needed it! Do more fights have to happen before you get reinforcements?” He rattles off, taking a big gulp of water from the cup.

“Thanks Jaybird.” You take his bowl and pour some stew in. “I knew I could count on you to be on my side.”

“Always. Besides, you couldn’t do any wrong.”

You laughed, taking a sip of the comforting stew that instantly made your worries go away for that moment.

“But I’m serious.”

“About what?” You ask.

“That you’re doing a great job.” Jason states. “Not because I’m trying to humor you,” he clarifies. “I think you’ve went out of your way to try to fill that empty gap as much as possible for these kids. Considering what you went through back then, you could have just taken a back seat.”

As Jason’s encouragement spills out from the bottom of his heart, you realized that was all you needed. That despite shitty moments, someone told you that you did your best, and that was all that mattered.

“So don’t think about it too much alright? At least not tonight. Because we are going to have the best meal of our lives!” Jason declares, ordering a soju bomb. You protest at that but he waves the concerns away, mischievously waving a black credit card which you could only assume belonged to one person.

“Only for my best girl.” He grins, offering to clink glasses with you. “To being your biggest supporter and shitting on shit people!” He raises his voice, earning some stares from other patrons, causing you to giggle.

“Cheers! To trusting myself and not listening to shit people!”

Jason roars with delight at your loose lipped declaration and pours you another drink, continuing the carefree evening with good food, good laughter and the best company.

Yeah, you were going to be okay.

[phoenixyfriend]

Also @professorsparklepants and I both spend a lot of time talking about getting Sanji pregnant (cycles through fem!Sanji, trans Sanji, and bog standard mpreg depending on how we're feeling that day) and ANYWAY

I want Sanji to be clearly miserable and complaining about his sore ankles and aching back and acid reflux and loose hips and also REFUSING to sit down or take it easy on the meals like NO this is HIS job he's not going to just lay back in a deck chair with a book, stop trying to make him sit down! And they stop. And he starts bitching again..

He's fine, he just wants to complain.

And he will still bite some heads off of they try to request MORE work of him, specifically Luffy and Zoro.

Don't ask him to do more. Don't tell him to lay down and relax. Don't make him stop complaining. There are no right answers except letting him bitch about the situation.

Please think about pregnant Sanji being forced to sit down for a bit, and Nami tries to be nice by peeling a few tangerines as a snack since Sanji is waddling now.

And it segues into the two of them telling LET ME HELP YOU DAMMIT because Nami wants to help the very pregnant person and Sanji has worms in his brain about being useful to Pretty Gorls.

And as @whirlibird put it:

losing it thinking about sanji in the 3rd trimester trying to kick someone crew, horrified Sanji, about to tip the fuck over Chopper: BED REST. ABSOLUTELY VITAL YOU BE ON BED REST. Sanji: I feel fine though. You said I was fine last week. Chopper: THAT WAS BEFORE YOU TRIED TO AX KICK ZORO.

"Sanji, you're glowing! Pregnancy really suits y--" "Eat shit and die."

Also, thinking about Zeff holding his grandchildren.

Someone goes off to get him because Sanji made an offhand comment about wanting his adoptive dad to be there for the birth and so THEY GOTTA GET ZEFF.

For a plotty element, also...

Possibility: One of Sanji's kids is trans and after some awkward "I am going to be supportive and hope I don't show any of my Kamabaka memories on my face" conversations and some time (a few months? Years, if they aren't totally sure yet?) to adjust later, Sanji calls up Ivankov like

"Hey, so, I haven't discussed it with the person on question yet because I'm not sure I have enough goodwill with you, but... there's this person I know who'd like to transition..."

Ivankov BOOKS it to help Sanji and whoever the friend is. Almost cries upon figuring out it's Sanji's own kid.

Prof:

Sanji is crying. ivankov is crying. The kid is crying. Everyone is ugly crying.

(IDK if this is a setting with trans Sanji or fem Sanji or someone else was pregnant or the kid was adopted or what, just that the canon-esque tension is there so it was notable and important that Sanji works on it.)

[sunflowergirl522]

Flower Girls

Pairing: Eddie Munson x Mom!Reader

Summary: It’s the girls first day of school and you’re missing them while Callie gets teased over her full name. Luckily Eddie’s there to help both of you.

A/N: Yes this is vaguely inspired by Chrysanthemum.

Word Count: 2044

The Twins Masterlist

“Thanks again for coming with me Eddie.” It’s probably the third time you’ve thanked him since you both left your house to pick the girls up from their first day of kindergarten. “And for being there for me today.”

“It’s no problem, I’d do it again in a heartbeat.” 

About an hour after you had dropped them off you had called Eddie to see if he wanted to come over hiding how distraught you were over the phone. When he got there he saw right through your act and immediately brought you into his arms asking what was wrong. That was when you started crying and admitting how much you missed your babies and how you feel lost being in the house without them. Today was the first time in a really long time that you were without both of them for an extended period of time and the silence was getting to you.

Eddie held you close to him as you spoke while slowly backing you up into the living room. He told you to pick a movie while he made some famous Munson ham sandwiches, a regular ham sandwich really but it’s almost exclusively all he and Wayne eat so they’re special to him. He had wiped the tear streaks and the few peeking out of the corners of your eyes away with his thumbs while he spoke. You nodded and he brought you into another quick hug wanting nothing more than to drop a kiss to your forehead before heading into the kitchen.

What you appreciated the most about the whole thing was how Eddie never told you you were overreacting or tried to make you feel better by saying you’ll see them in a few hours. All he did was try to distract you from the fact that they weren’t around and keep you entertained so time went by quicker. And when you had tried to apologize for being so emotional over it he covered your mouth with his hand before you could even finish your sentence, telling you there was nothing to apologize for. And then you asked him to come with you when you picked them up so you didn’t get too emotional then like you almost did this morning when Callie did not want to leave your side to go in.

“When I leave today do you want me to take another box or two to Goodwill?” Eddie asks as he follows you out of the car and towards the pick up area. Between your family looking through them and Eddie taking the ones you’ve okayed for donations you’ve gotten almost every box taking up the front room out of there.

“Yeah, that’d be great. That would just leave me with the couple of boxes I’m waiting for Steve’s parents to come look through. I think I’ll just drop them off at his house though.”

“Are you gonna want any help setting up the playroom?”

“I won’t say no if that's you offering.” You smile up at him before your attention immediately gets drawn to Callie who’s rushing towards you.

“Mommy!” You crouch just in time to catch her in a hug and she immediately bursts into tears against your chest. Your eyes go wide with worry and you rub her back holding her tightly against you while looking up at Eddie panicked. Primrose is close behind her sister stopping next to you not noticing Eddie until he says something in greeting. You don’t catch it, you're too busy trying to soothe Callie.

“Come on baby, let’s go home.” You whisper it into Callie’s hair before standing up keeping her in your arms. “Eddie, can you drive?”

“Sure thing Princess.” He takes the keys from you and holds his hand out for Primrose to take for on the way to the car. She’s quiet as she watches you with Callie and Eddie catches a look of confusion on her face as she stays latched onto you refusing to let go to sit in the back seat. Eddie helps Primrose buckle up in the back seat while you take your spot in the front with Callie on your lap hoping your arms are enough to keep her safe.

“You’re gonna be okay baby. Let it out sweet girl.” You murmur repeatedly in her ear the whole drive home, caressing the back of her head as she cries into your shoulder.

“Is Callie okay Mama?” Primrose asks as Eddie pulls into your driveway her voice full of worry for her sister. 

“I don’t know Rosie baby. She’ll have to let us know when she’s calmed down enough to speak.” Eddie rushes around the car once it’s been parked to open your door for you before going to let Primrose out of the back. “Thanks Eddie.”

“Anytime, I’ll get the door for you.” He walks quickly in front of you and holds it open while you walk past him, his worried glance going straight to Callie as you go.

“Darling, can I put you down to get your shoes off?” You sway a bit as you speak softly to your now almost dried eyed girl. She nods and lets go of her grip on you so you can sit her on the staircase. Once you do get her shoes off Eddie’s right there to take them from you and put them on the shoe rack knowing how you don’t like when shoes are left everywhere but that you would’ve left them in your worry. Primrose is at Callies side almost as soon as you set her down, putting a hand on her shoulder and asking what’s wrong. Eddie’s never seen siblings care about each other the way that your girls care about each other, it warms his heart to see it.

“Do you feel ready to talk about what made you feel upset?” You gently wipe the tear streaks from her cheeks as you ask. She nods in response. “Let's go get comfy on the couch and you can tell me about it okay?”

You stand and hold your hand out for her to take. She stands before taking it and you let her lead the way into the living room. Primrose follows close behind silently. With Eddie lagging a little behind unsure if he should be around for this despite all his worry for Callie. Once Callie’s seated in her spot on the couch, Primrose sitting next to her, you crouch down and take her hands in your own and Eddie hovers awkwardly in the doorway. 

“Do you want Eddie to go away while you tell me?” 

“No, want him to stay.” She murmurs and you motion with your head for him to come join you in front of them. He can’t help but feel some type of way at the fact that she wants him to stay while she talks about it. 

“What’s wrong, Cals?” He asks as he gets next to you on the floor. She opens her mouth to speak but then shuts it again. She’s quiet for another minute before you bring the backs of her hands to your mouth to place kisses on them.

“You know you can tell me anything baby. And if you can’t get the words out then that’s okay too, we don’t have to talk about it.”

“This boy in my class made fun of my name after the teacher called it out. He said it was too long and hard to say and weird.” Callie’s always loved her name and when you use it so hearing someone make fun of it and in response other kids laugh at it really upset her.

“Oh my sweet girl, come here.” You’re quick to pull her off the couch and into your lap when you notice her eyes tearing up again.

“And then during naptime I started crying because I missed you and he called me a crybaby.” She whimpers through her words as she speaks. Eddie watches as Primrose's face scrunches up in anger. It’s clear to him that she didn’t know it happened. “Am I a crybaby mama?”

“You Calliopsis, are not a crybaby.” She smiles at the way your soothing yet serious voice says her full name full of love. And Eddie’s eyes widen a bit upon hearing her full name for the first time. “You’re a Y/l/n and we Y/l/ns are an emotional group of people.”

“We are?”

“Yep. You know what I did today?”

“What?”

“I cried.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, I missed you and your sister so much while you were gone. I made Eddie come over to help distract me, didn’t I Eds?”

“That’s right, cried like a baby into my chest over it. But that was okay because it’s good to get those feelings out.” He’s nervous his wording was all wrong for the situation but then you smile at him from over Callie’s shoulder and it fixes all his nerves. 

“Look at me Calliopsis.” She turns her head to look at you from where she was wide eyed staring at Eddie. “It's okay to cry, it’s good to get all your feelings off of your chest. You’re not a crybaby for feeling things and having a reaction to them. And I’ll always be here to help you through it, always. Okay?” She nods and you bring her into a hug. 

“You two are named after flowers you know?” You hear later as you make dinner and Eddie plays with the girls. “Two really pretty ones.” You’re not sure how he knows that exactly but you’re quickly distracted from that with how excited the girls sound at the idea.

“Calliopsis are considered to be fairies' favorite type of flowers and they say that the way to see fairies is to look over the petals of a primrose.”

“Really?”

“Really.”

“Dinner’s done!” You get down bowls for the spaghetti and Eddie comes into the kitchen to take them out of your hands.

“Go sit with your girls, I'll bring everything in.”

“Are you sure?” He nods and pushes you with his shoulder towards the dining room.

“Mama, are we really named after fairy flowers?”

“You are but I didn’t name you after them because of fairies. I did it because of what they can mean and because my grandma used to always have them in her garden.”

“What do they mean?”

“Calliopsis can be symbolic of love at first sight. Which is exactly what happened when I first laid eyes on the two of you. And primrose can be symbolic of eternal love. Which is what I have for you, my pretty girls.” They get distracted from the conversation as Eddie brings in the pot and starts placing bowls in front of everyone, filling them up as he goes.

“Do you know a lot about flower meanings?” Eddie asks you after he takes his seat next to you ready to dig into the meal he knows will be amazing.

“Not really, my gran helped me name them. She was big on knowing about all the different flowers. Do you know a lot about flowers and fairies?” He shrugs and twirls his fork around to catch the noodles.

“A little, my aunt was into gardening and when I would go out to help her she’d tell me things about fairies to keep me interested. We had our own little fairy garden.” 

“That’s nice.” You don’t push for more information knowing it’s hard for him to talk about his late aunt and instead smile and lean in closer to him as you eat.

“Thanks for being here today Eddie.” He’s getting ready to leave after you put the girls to bed, not wanting to stay and keep you up when your first day of work is tomorrow. He has to get home and start looking for his aunt's books on gardening after promising the girls he’d help them make their own fairy garden anyway. “For me and for Callie.”

“You don’t have to thank me Princess, I’m happy to help. Besides, I love your girls.” I love you he wants to say but he isn’t sure how you’d react. 

“They love you too.”

“I’ll see you around.”

“Yeah see ya Eddie. Get home safe.”

“Always.”

Eddie Taglist: @sadbitchfangirl​ @notbeforelong​​ @munsonswhore86​​ @navs-bhat​ @emotionaldreamer​ ​​​ @magicalchocolatecheesecake​ @awesome-badass-cafeteria-sauce​ ​​ @fangirling-4-ever @gaysludge​ @audhd-dragonaut​ ​​ ​@eddiethesexy​ @mazerunnerrose​ @tvserie-s-world​ @midnightsgetawaycar  @goldylions  @spacedoutdaydreamer @livslifeonline @mushroomelephant @ginnupp @saramelaniemoon @kaylshunter @nojamsonmytoast @vintagehellfire @esoltis280 @spikedhe4rt @let-love-bleeds-red @siriuslysmoking @toobsessedsstuff @alana4610 @gretavanfleas @sparkletash @aactuaaltraash @gloryekaterina @eddiemuns0nl0verr @spookyemorockbabe

Everything Taglist: @bejeweledmastermind @matchamunson​ @bubsonnobx​ @practicalghost​ @katsukis1wife @crustyowos @yourfavdummy @protecteddiemunson4vr @kennedy-brooke

[accio-victuuri]

Excerpts from this interview posted today: Liu Mintao: The "son" Wang Yibo in "One and Only" is a sensitive and kind child.

This interview is about LM and her role in the film, so I left ones talking about Yibo & Chen Shuo. 🫶🏼

Liu Mintao said that before the filming of "One and Only" began, she and Wang Yibo, who played her son in the film, did not know each other very well. After cooperating, she believes that this child who does not talk much and is relatively introverted has brought her a lot of feeling, "He is the kind of child who does things silently, very sensitive, very careful, he is a person who is full of kindness and willing to give to others."

There is a very touching scene in "One and Only", Du Lisa, who has always cared about her son Chen Shuo and hopes that he can persist in pursuing his dreams, in order to reduce Chen Shuo's burden and help Chen Shuo buy more time to dance, Du Lisa, who has not been out of the mountain for a long time, chose to sing on stage and perform for her son. Because of his father's death, Chen Shuo has always been reluctant to let his mother sing, because every time his mother sings, she misses his father very much, but for the child's dream, she is willing to perform for him, when Chen Shuo saw this scene burst into tears, facing Tu Lisa on the stage, he was full of guilt, and also burst into tears because of the greatness of maternal love.

This is the first scene shot by Liu Mintao after entering the group, and it is also a very important crying scene for Wang Yibo. Director Dapeng recalled that everyone has been preparing for this scene for a long time, which is a very important scene, because the two actors are professional and fully prepared, and finally "one" passed, and he was blinded. Later, this scene also became a touching tear point in the whole film, Liu Mintao said that she did not expect that the first scene could be so tacitly acted, "really" emotional presentation is the best: "The play of "One and Only" is very strong, this is not specially created or improvised by us, this plot, the screenwriter teacher set up the possibility of making the audience empathize, because everyone in real life has been a child and has been a child, and such a blood thicker than water emotion, as long as it is presented very true, it can move people." Liu Mintao recalled that when she filmed this scene, she was singing on stage, and she couldn't see anything offstage, but Wang Yibo could watch her offstage, in fact, she didn't know how Wang Yibo performed. Later, when she saw the finished film, she was also completely moved, "I think Yibo showed Chen Shuo's state at that time very well, his gesture of wiping tears, his uncomfortable expression of crying, acting really well, he did 'the real thing is the best'." ”

Partnering with Wang Yibo for the first time, he works silently and is full of goodwill

The portrayal of family affection in "One and Only" is real and touching. In Liu Mintao's view, a big reason is due to her tacit cooperation with Wang Yibo. Liu Mintao said that before the filming started, everyone only knew each other, but they didn't know much about each other. She knew that Wang Yibo was a well-known actor, and he was shy and restrained. After working together, this child who doesn't talk much and is relatively introverted brought her a lot of touch: "One time when we went to a scene to film, I walked in front, and there was a burst of rice smell in front of me, because it was almost time for dinner. , I muttered a few words to myself, 'What is this delicious? It smells so good'. After the filming of the scene at noon, I went back to the resting place to eat, and there was a bowl of beef stew on the table. I asked later, I realized it was delivered by Yibo. I thought he must have heard me when I muttered. He didn’t say anything, and gave you me bowl when he turned around. He is the kind of child who works silently and is very sensitive. , He is very careful, he is full of kindness and willing to give to others, I am very moved."

Chen Shuo (played by Wang Yibo) and his mother (played by Liu Mintao) are busy in the restaurant.

Liu Mintao said that the mother-child relationship in "One and Only" not only moved the audience, but also deeply moved her. She hopes that young people in every family will not be disappointed in life, but should have hope and expectations for life. You can live a good life: "People can find joy, warmth and support from suffering, and these are also things that family members can give to each other. It doesn't mean that I have to ask for it when I was born. In family relationships, we must know gratitude. Family members support each other. The greatest power to live a good life." She sighed with a smile, playing the role of Du Lisha really brought her a big surprise, she remembered that Dapeng showed her a part of Du Lisa's play during the later dubbing, she did not expect that after the cut The finished film was so pleasantly surprised, "It turned out that I acted like this at that time, and I was quite happy."

[hotforharrison]

My ex-husband visited last night to have some time together as friends, and we spent a couple hours watching a show about sunken ships on Disney+ and had dinner together.

It was nice.

I admitted to him how much I missed him and that I genuinely appreciated him seeing me, even if it was on different terms than we used to have.

He cuddled me on the sofa for a while, and he let me cry all the tears seeing him again brought out of me.

We talked about very hard things for me to talk about, while I cried more than I thought I would, and we're going to go to the courthouse to file the paperwork to legally start the divorce this coming week.

He had some overtime this last paycheck, so it won't be a problem to pay for the (stupidly expensive) court costs.

We've been separated for almost two months now. He's moved out, and nothing else will change because of some paperwork, but it's somehow different dissolving our bond legally.

When I was finishing up cleaning his former room to turn it into my own space, completely devoid of his things, I found the ring he wore when we got married, the temporary one I got for less than $20 at Walmart in 2010. I didn't know he kept it for all these years.

It fucking broke me for some reason, and I cried for so long at the discovery.

Even if it wasn't stupidly hot, I can't be in the master bedroom. It feels so wrong. There's no more "us," and the decor is different, but it still feels like "our" room. We shared it for over a decade.

Maybe that feeling will fade with time.

Right now, I can't bring myself to remove his stuff from the vanity or the shower, even though I know he's not coming back.

I'm not in denial. It's just hard to accept it, that this chapter of my life is ending, and I'm so fucking terrified. I've never been more hurt or scared in my life.

I've been spending most of my time in his former room that has the window AC unit, which I'm working on make into something that's as mine as possible with very, very minimal spending -- just using as much stuff that I already have as possible.

I might have to hit up a Goodwill or two to see if I can find some wall decor on the cheap. It's looking like I'm coming up short in that department, and it's so important to me to make the single room I'm spending extended periods of time in as homey and mine as possible.

I'm not painting it, at least not any time soon, because I'll be (hopefully) starting to work soon. The room will stay deep space blue for the time being.

It's not the worst color ever, just not very me.

But I'm not the same me I was before I met him all those years ago.

He's always going to be a part of me.

You don't spend 17 years with someone without that person becoming a permanent piece of you.

Maybe the blue is kind of like that -- that piece of him that stays with me while I'm starting down my own path without him by my side.

Anyway, in addition to trying to carve out my own space in his former room, which is a work in progress, I've been working on getting the kitchen cabinet trim ready to be painted before I paint the walls and the cabinets themselves.

There are four layers of paint on those cabinets. It's taking multiple applications of paint stripper to get it off so I can properly paint the trim, which is my first task.

I want to get the trim done and the new liners put in so I can put what I'm keeping into the cabinets again instead of being a huge mess in my former room. The mess is bothering me, just knowing it's there.

My goal is to get the kitchen completely done before July 18 -- the date of my next meeting with the vocational rehabilitation case manager so I can get a job. He called it the "planning" meeting, since I was accepted into the program.

I'm supposed to send him a résumé, and I'm like "...I haven't worked since early 2008, and my work experience was stocking shelves at Walmart."

My college education in IT is irrelevant because technology has changed so much since 2006 when I graduated.

I'll send him one, though.

Maybe there's some form or something I can plug my information into without putting in a ton of effort for the absolutely pointless résumé.

[the-purest-wolf]

I swear. I read each volume trying to latch on to a bit of comfort for Court 🤷

Justine, who treats Six as one of her canine patients and cooing over a crying man?

She feeds him. She serves a croissant and coffee. She lets him take a nap 🥺

Don, the cunning old man who used Claire to motivate Gray Man on the verge of death to go to the rescue of his family. And Court has a soft spot for this girl, so on the verge of a breakdown, he promises to save her.

And Claire worries so much about Jim, doesn't want to leave him, and helps him when he barely walks about his own🥺

Sierra One calls Court "young" even though he is an adult? And he insists on killing him, but he doesn't.

Ellena... She's just convinced that she can fix Gray Man. They have this great chemistry and just want to give Gentry some warmth. (WHERE IS MY SCENE IN THE HOTEL, WHERE AFTER A LOVELY NIGHT COURT CUDDLES UP TO A PRETTY WOMAN???) Ellen has so much faith and trust in Court 🥺

And Eddie. Oh Eddie... What kind of guy he was. You've known each other for so short a time, and Court was willing to die for you! This guy has shown more goodwill throughout Gentry's career than anyone else. Eddie he was imprisoned and was to be rescued by a man with malaria. Irony. Indeed, Gentry was quite unlucky *laughter*.

Eddie He was so affected by leaving a sick Court in the jungle that I thought my heart was going to break. Two weeks?

They made the two men die for each other.

Those gentle touches, checking temperatures, giving their own rations, beating down fevers , rubbing limbs when Court was trembling and Eddi's steadfastness that they would escape from prison together, even if he had to lumber Gentry on his back made me want to cry.

And in the end, he had to abandon a barely conscious Gray Man, who tried to convince a concerned Eddie that once he was safe, the CIA would rescue the ailing Court.

And then that scene when Gray Man, who was left in the mud - ready to die, though terrified by the vision of drowning in a puddle because he couldn't move - finally saw Eddie and almost started to cry. Until then, I have not seen Court laugh as many times as he did then in prison with Eddie. And that code name "Sally" given by Eddie *Laughter*.

When , so Court finally saw the little sister Eddie had talked so much about…. She was beautiful , so similar to Eddie, and yet different, not of this world. Mark Greaney, the Gamboa siblings, Eddie and Laura would take excellent care of Court. Maybe I am biased because I love threesomes , but that chemistry between Eddie and Court and his sister is beautiful and tragic.

[aebi12]

"Sinful Desires" - Chapter 24

“I have to go see him”

Alyssa pulls the covers off her and moves to the edge of the bed. A sudden, fleeting stab of pain makes her stop for a moment.

"You need to rest," Alys has stood up, and places her hand gently against her shoulder trying to push her back onto the bed, "You have lost a lot of blood, and you are too weak right now”

“Aemond has been unconscious for weeks, Alys, I must go see him. He’s most likely feeling disoriented, and he's probably looking for me,” the young woman shakes Alys's hand, “Besides, what's the point of resting? It will not reverse or worsen my situation”

"You are too hard on yourself, princess."

I'm too dumb, that’s for sure, she thinks bitterly as she stands up. This is all her fault. She had been drinking that damn tea without even paying attention to her body's signals, how come she hadn't realized before that her ailments started with that beverage? Her goodwill towards Aemond's mother, and her attempt to maintain a semblance of peace had only made her sick. And root out her chances of being a mother.

“Come with me, I want you to examine the prince,” she tells the woman once she is dressed, “Where is my brother?” she asks, turning to the maid

"In the kitchens with his nanny." When she notices Alyssa's confused expression, she adds, "The cook made peach pies."

"Ah," she sighs, "Have the nanny keep him entertained for a while, I'll talk to him later."

The maid curtsies before leaving. Alys offers Alyssa her arm so they can walk together toward Aemond's room.

"I trust I have your discretion about what just happened"

“You know that I will say nothing”

Alyssa nods, "Thank you, Alys."

"Do you plan to tell him at some point?" she asks when they are in front of the door of the prince's room.

"Not today," she replies, "Soon, maybe."

Alyssa pushes the door open and her eyes immediately go to the bed.

"There you are," Aemond is half leaning against the head of the bed, surely the maids have helped him place a couple of pillows behind him. His voice sounds hoarse, and the dark circles under his eyes are noticeable, but a smile forms on his lips.

"Aemond!" despite her pain she almost runs to his bed, sitting on the edge as she takes his hands “How do you feel? Are you in pain? Can you breathe properly?"

His smirk widens and he takes Alyssa's hands, bringing them to his lips, "Strangely, I'm not in much pain."

“That's because he was asleep through the worst,” Alys says, walking over to the bed as well and starting to examine him, “You don’t have a fever and your ribs have healed properly.”

Alyssa lets out a deep breath and her body seems to release a huge weight. Aemond looks alive. Tired, weak, but fine.

“How long has it been? Where is Vhagar?

“You have slept for almost three weeks,” the girl replies, “and Vhagar is protected. Surely healing, as you are too"

"Protected?" his sky-blue eye looks at her suspiciously

“A lot has happened while you recovered,” Alyssa closes her eyes briefly as a new pang of pain reaches her womb, “A lot has changed in the realm, but it doesn't matter now,” she rushes to say before he interrupts her, “You must rest, and regain your strength"

"Are you sick?" he asks, surprising her.

"What? No, of course I am not," she replies trying to control her gestures so that her face doesn't give her away.

“But something's wrong,” he looks at her with a frown, “You were crying until recently. And you look pale”

“I was worried, just that,” the princess denies and tries to smile, “These past few weeks were so hard to endure. For a moment I really thought I had lost you,” her voice cracks, but she manages to smile again, “It's over. Nothing else matters anymore,” she stands up and looks at Alys, “Check his wound, please”

If Aemond finds her answers evasive, he doesn't say so, but his gaze doesn't stray from Alyssa either, so she flicks her eyes to Alys, who removes the bandage from Aemond's waist so she can examine the wound.

"Is healing well, in a few days you’ll probably be able to get back on your feet."

"Days? I can't stand being bedridden for so long again," grumbles the prince.

“You won't have a choice,” Alyssa interjects.

"But I need to see my dragon"

“Vhagar can wait,” she says, exasperated, “You were on the brink of death, Aemond, are you aware of that?”

"Eating will help him," Alys interrupts the prince's response, "I'll go to the kitchens to get something for the prince."

"Thank you, Alys."

There is a moment of silence when the woman leaves the room.

"I assume we're still in Harrenhal."

"Yes, but we put you in one of the rooms on the first floor"

“And may I know how you've kept this place running the past few weeks? We barely had resources and now there are even new guards”

"Aemond..."

"How is Vhagar being protected?"

"Aemond"

"Alyssa," he pouts as he tries to move and change position on bed, "I need to know exactly what our situation is, our enemies could come at any moment."

"You don't have to worry about that, we're safe here"

"How? Why?" he demands to know, “Tell me please, I need…”

"You need to rest and recover, just that," she interrupts him and approaches his bed once more, "The realm can wait"

“Knowing what happened won't stop me from recovering,” he insists, “You can't keep me hidden here without news, and isolated from everything.”

"Don't exaggerate, you are not isolated, and certainly you are not a hostage," she looks at him reproachfully.

"Is bad news about my brother. Or maybe my mother,” he says fearfully and his good eye seems uneasy, “Or was it… is it Jaehaera?” his voice breaks when thinking about the possibility that something had happened with his niece

“They are fine,” she assures him, “Don't think…”

“I don't know what to think if you don't tell me what happened,” he takes her hand and intertwines their fingers, “Please, Alyssa, tell me.”

The prince insists a few more times until her resolution crumbles. Alyssa closes her eyes for a moment and smirks. The headache, her constant companion, bothering her again. She's too tired to deal with Aemond's stubbornness right now.

"What do you want to know?"

“Who do those guards serve?”

"Your brother. He sent them for yours and Vhagar's protection"

"My brother" he looks at her strangely. She nods, "You mean Aegon?"

"Yes, him"

"You're joking with me, aren't you?" he lets out an incredulous chuckle that dies quickly at the look on Alyssa's expression, "Aegon is alive?"

“He is. And now he is the absolute king of the Seven Kingdoms”

It takes Aemond a few seconds to absorb what the girl has just told him.

"How? His injuries were terrible, he could barely move without help, and now he is the king? How?" His next questions die on his lips as he notices that the girl's green eyes fill with tears. Realization hits him suddenly, "Your mother?"

"Yes," Alyssa finally answers, "He murdered her on Dragonstone."

“I'm so sorry, my love, I can't imagine how much you must be suffering,” he replies as his fingers subtly trail to Alyssa's wrists, searching for the trace of any injury. His body is relieved not noticing any new one, "When did this happen?"

"Probably at the same time as your fight with Daemon, although I didn't find out until several days later."

“I'm sorry, Alyssa,” he repeats, “are you okay?”

She shrugs, "I should be used to loss people at this point don't you think?" she tries to put a teasing tone into her voice, but she fails miserably, so she takes a deep breath to calm herself, “I'm trying to cope, I guess. My days are filled with memories, but I focus only on the good ones. At the end of it all I was able to say goodbye to her in a way, and I also have my Aegon so…”

"Where is that boisterous child?"

"Eating pies in the kitchen," Alyssa smiles, and her eyes light up, which eases Aemond's concern a bit.

"Does he know what happened to his mother?"

“I explained it to him,” the girl nods, “but I don't think he really understands the fact that he'll never see his mother again, he asks about her a lot and it's…it's hard.”

Aemond pushes the pain aside so he can reach out to Alyssa and hold her. She visibly relaxes in his embrace, and allows him to cradle her against his chest as he strokes her hair. She hadn't realized how much she missed being this close to the prince, the warmth of his touch, the security that being in his arms gives her.

Alys interrupts the moment by entering with a bowl of soup. The princess wipes a few tears from her eyes and takes the tray from the woman's hands, "Thank you Alys, you can leave this with me."

"Are you sure? I can take care of the prince if you need to rest."

“I don't need to rest,” she replies in a clipped voice.

Alys nods and leaves the room. Alyssa returns to the bed and places a napkin in Aemond's lap.

"Do you think you can feed yourself?"

"Of course, I can," Aemond replies, taking the spoon.

Alyssa frowns and watches carefully as the prince begins to eat. The room falls silent for several minutes, and though Aemond inwardly wants to know exactly how his brother managed to commit such accomplishment as it is to now be the only ruler of the realm, he doesn't press her for more details.

She seems to notice his need to know more about it, so she begins to tell him the same things that Lord Corlys had told her during his visit. When she finishes her story, Aemond wears a shocked expression that's even comical.

“Sunfyre managed to fly to Dragonstone? He was nearly broken the last time I saw him."

“He died shortly after because of his wounds”

The news saddens Aemond. The beautiful dragon had amply confirmed his strong bond with his rider, assisting him to the end with all his might. And if Sunfyre managed to recover from his severe injuries, Vhagar would surely heal as well. It had to be like this.

"Have you seen Vhagar?"

“In the distance, when I accompanied Lord Corlys to retrieve Daemon's body. The soldiers say that she has started to feed herself, that's a good sign, right?"

Aemond nods, inwardly wishing she’s right. He couldn't bear the prospect of losing his grumpy friend.

"So now that my brother is king, what happened to the lords who supported your mother?"

“I think the majority bent the knee. I don't know exactly if there is any kind of resistance, I didn't ask Lord Corlys too much. Although I know that Lord Tyland is no longer a prisoner and now he serves on the small council, and that it was the Baratheons who reclaimed the capital for Aegon."

“The Baratheons? That means that Jaehaera is in the city.”

"Jaehaera was in Storm's End?"

“Yes, it seemed to me that they were the most suitable to take care of her. They were our most important allies."

Alyssa just nods, "I don't know if Jaehaera is with her father, I guess so, it would make sense."

"Aegon will take care of her until we can return," he tells her, sensing the girl's concern for the little princess.

"That was the reason Lord Corlys came," she sighs, "Aegon summoned you to the capital, of course I informed him that you weren't fit to fly, so he simply left a mini army here, and returned to King's Landing."

"Does Aegon know that your brother lives?"

"I think so"

Aemond takes Alyssa's chin in her hand and makes her face him, “I won't let my brother hurt yours. You won't lose your Aegon."

She smiles, though it's a tired smile, and her hand caresses the prince's face, "I think we both know it's not something you can really assure me."

 “Alyssa…”

“It's okay, Aemond, I know you mean well,” this time it's her who kisses his hands, as he usually does, “But you're right about something, I'm not going to lose my brother. Now eat, you need to regain your strength."

He doesn't contradict her, he just keeps eating and drinking the tea that Alys left on the nightstand.

“There is something else you are not telling me,” he says after pushing the plate away.

"What?" Alyssa, who has been staring at a spot on the ground, is surprised by his words.

"There is something you are not telling me"

"I already told you everything I know"

“Come on, Alyssa, give me some credit,” he sighs and tries once more to move closer to her, “I know you. I know something else must have happened, I can tell."

“I don't know what you mean,” she replies, though her voice betrays her.

Aemond examines her face with concern, the sad look in her eyes and the sickly paleness of her complexion. He knows that there is something that is not right, but he also knows that it is better to give the girl space and let her be the one to tell him, “I'm not going to insist, but tell me when you're ready. Please"

Alyssa swallows and holds his gaze for a few long seconds before nodding.

***

“Now that you're finally awake, can we fly on your dragon?

Aegon sits at the end of Aemond's bed, his hands curiously leafing through the book his cousin has been reading.

"Yes, if your sister allows us"

Aegon grimaces and glances at Alyssa, who is sitting watching them both.

“Do you want to see what I found in the garden today?”

The boy carelessly approaches Aemond and takes a collection of stones of different shapes and colors from his coat pocket, “I found them by the river. Alys says the water will turn to ice very soon."

Aemond examines the stones and gives Aegon a tiny smile, "Perhaps one of these days I can accompany you in your walks."

Aegon smiles at the prospect. In the last week he has visited his cousin frequently, showing him trinkets that he collects from the garden, the river and his treasures from the castle. Fortunately, Harrenhal is big and mysterious enough for the boy to discover new things every day. The idea had been given to him by Aemond and he had accepted the challenge with delight.

"Do you know how to fight with a sword?"

"Of course, I’m a warrior"

"Will you teach me? I want to be a fine knight"

“I could teach you,” Aemond nods.

“Can we practice tomorrow?” questions, excited

“Aemond still needs to rest, Egg. Maybe in a few days…”

“You always say no,” Aegon interrupts, glancing at her.

Aemond and Alyssa exchange a look, amused in the prince's case, exasperated in hers.

“Do you want me to read a story for you?” Alyssa asks, trying once more, “Maybe the one with the dragons and…”

"Can you read for me?" Aegon looks at Aemond.

The prince raises his eyebrows and doesn't know what to answer. He hasn't read for anyone in a long time, the last time he had read children's stories had been to the twins. The memory of the siblings twists his heart, and he's tempted to make an excuse and tell Aegon no, but one look into the little boy's expectant violet eyes is enough to make him nod.

Aegon smirks and snuggles into Aemond's side, pulling himself under the covers. Alyssa sighs and hands Aemond the volume she had been reading for her brother. “This is it,” she says marking a page, “It's his favorite.”

Aemond's deep voice fills the room. Between the story, the cold and the warmth of the fireplace, Aegon is fast asleep next to him after a few minutes.

“That was easy,” Aemond comments, closing the book.

Alyssa's gaze is fixed on both of them, in the scene made up by the small silver-haired boy next to Aemond, who arranges the blankets so that he doesn't get cold. Her heart breaks a little when her treacherous mind imagines their baby being cradled by the prince. A baby that will probably never exist.

"Alyssa?"

"What? Ah yes, he fell asleep easily,” she smiles sadly, “At least he is having fun with you, I'm not his favorite person lately”

“I can try to talk to him if you'd like,” he proposes, extending his hand to hers.

“Look at you,” she raises her eyebrows and stands up to take his hand, “Putting a good word on my behalf to my brother”

"It doesn't bother you right?" he asks as he pats the bed

“Of course not,” she replies with a giggle, “I find it adorable that he likes you. And frankly, I’m relieved”

Alyssa settles into the limited space between the edge of the bed and Aemond, carefully hugging his body.

“What were you thinking a moment ago? You seemed… absent”

Alyssa looks up at him. He had noticed her mortification, of course.

“I imagined something that caused me great illusion”

"May I know what was it?" he asks quietly.

She knows that the question is deeper than it sounds. She knows that he's noticed that her mood hasn't been the best for the last few days, and that it's not just because Aegon is ignoring her. She knows that there is a different sadness installed in her eyes.

“The day you woke up,” she begins shakily, “I had a miscarriage.”

Alyssa watches carefully for his reaction. Astonishment, at first, to later give way to bewilderment, grief and understanding.

“That's why you looked like you were sick,” he sighs, his hand unconsciously resting on her belly, “Are you okay? Did you heal…properly?”

“Yeah, I guess so,” she places her hand over his, finding it warm while stroking his long fingers, “It was…surprising, if I'm honest. I didn't know J was with child again and…”

"It's okay, it's not your fault," he hastened to say, remembering the feelings Alyssa had experienced last time, "These things happen, we'll have better luck next time."

His words seem to be the wrong ones, because instead of reassuring her, Alyssa starts sobbing.

"Fuck, I'm sorry, my love, did I say something I shouldn't?" Aemond turns his body towards her and cups her face in his hands, wiping away her tears with his thumbs, “I'm sorry, it's just…”

"You didn't say anything wrong," she replies, shaking her head, "It's just that there's something you need to know."

Alyssa takes a deep breath to calm herself, inwardly debating for the umpteenth time whether she should tell Aemond about the fact that his mother is responsible for the news she is about to tell.

"There won't be a next time"

"Won't be?"

“Alys examined me after I lost the baby,” she explains, “she told me that my body is not capable of sheltering a baby, of getting it to develop enough to be born and live.”

“That doesn't make sense, does it? You are a young woman, and you told me yourself that these things happen. Queen Aemma, your grandmother," he cocks his head, "She managed to have your mother despite her losses. Surely you too…”

“No,” she silences him by placing a finger on his lips, “I don't want you to create expectations that aren't going to be fulfilled,” her voice cracks, but she continues to look the prince square in the eye, “I won't be able to be a mother. I will not be able to carry a baby inside me, Alys was very clear, it is most likely that I will never heal”

“It is a… is it some kind of disease? Maybe a maester…”

He cuts off at Alyssa's unfunny laugh. A maester had surely been the one who had placed her in this situation.

“A maester isn't going to reverse the situation, Aemond,” she replies, “I've probably let you down, I'm disappointed myself, I was hoping, no… wishing that I could start a family with you, but that's not going to happen, and I'm sorry. I am very sorry, because I know that you were also excited about the possibility of being a father and I see you… I see you with Egg and I know that you would have been the best father in the world, I am so sorry”

Aemond ponders her words as Alyssa stands up and walks away from him, heading to the window.

Did he dream of being a father? He had never given much thought to it. Aemond never really had a father. He had a man who bore that title, but who was more of a distant shadow who only kept reproaches and crumbs of stolen moments for him and his siblings. Aemond didn't really know what it was like to be a father, though he had been something of a father figure to Helaena's children.

But a child of his own blood? One of him and Alyssa? The prospect had indeed excited him, it had been the expected continuation of his union with the princess. The sudden news that they couldn't have a baby was unexpected, shocking, and sad, but it didn't change the way he felt about her. And he had to let her know that.

Aemond manages to get to his feet with little effort, his body has strengthened in the last week, so he has no problem walking over to the girl, who has her arms crossed in her lap and gazes out at the falling snow.

“I'm so sorry, my love,” he says wrapping his arms around her waist, “I'm sorry that you think you've let me down, like you have control over these kinds of matters,” Alyssa shudders at his words, but doesn't interrupt him, “Just because we can't have a baby, doesn't mean something has to change between us. For me, you will always be the most important person in my life. Just being by your side is enough for me"

"Really?" Alyssa turns to him and looks at him, searching for any trace of doubt in his expression.

“Really,” he nods at once, “whether or not we have kids isn't relevant to me. You and me, remember? Always you and me"

Alyssa smiles and hugs his chest, comforted by his words, even though the pain she continues to feel remains there, haunting her mind.

“Besides,” Aemond looks down at the bed, “we have a family in a way. Aegon has you and he can have me too, if you accept me as a part of his life”

"Of course, I do," she replies immediately, the relief and enormous affection she feels for Aemond multiplying at hearing his words, "But I warn you, he is not an easy child."

"I think I can handle him," he assures her, smugly.

"And then there's Jaehaera"

“Yes, there is also Jaehaera,” she nods with a smile, “Two children. A family for us”

"Our family. And no one else matters,” he assures her.

***

Two weeks later, Aemond is well enough to travel. Alyssa knows she can't put off returning to King's Landing any longer, but the idea of meeting people she doesn't want to see and who hurt her so much fills her with insecurity and fear.

Her fears are also transferred to her relationship with the prince. Her insecurity, her greatest enemy, does not stop plaguing her head with hateful questions, making her doubt the security that Aemond had conveyed to her when he said that he was not at all bothered by the fact of not having children. And when she isn't thinking that there will come a point where he will resent her for not being able to give him an heir, her mind tortures her with the idea that he won't trust her word when she tells him about the serious crime that his mother has inflicted on her.

"Are you afraid?"

"Afraid?"

Aemond's question catches her off guard, but he seems amused, standing beside her in one of the castle's towers, looking up at the sky where Vhagar hovers aimlessly.

"I know you didn't particularly enjoy flying last time."

"Oh, that," she shrugged, "it's not my thing, but I know we need to enter the city on dragon’s back”

A demonstration of strength, they both knew they had to establish from the start that there is still a strong and powerful dragon in the realm.

"Indeed," Aemond nods and looks proudly at Vhagar, admiring how much she has healed in recent weeks, "Aegon will surely explode in anticipation knowing that he will be able to fly again tomorrow."

“I don't doubt it,” smiles Alyssa. Her little brother had not stopped telling all the servants in the castle about his experience flying with his cousin.

“Everything will be fine,” Aemond assures her, linking his fingers through hers, “You know you don't have to see my brother unless you want to.”

Ah yes, there was also that matter. Alyssa had been very clear in telling him that she wasn't going to curtsy to Aegon, she wasn't even going to acknowledge his presence.

But that is not the matter that she is now so anxious about.

"You mean it right?" when he looks at her blankly, she explains, “Our little family. The children, you and me. We are your priority"

“My family has always been my priority, you know that,” he assures her.

“Yeah, but… but if something happened and we had to… I don't know, we had to go somewhere else. If I didn't want to live in the Red Keep anymore. I know your brother probably wants you by his side to rule, but if something were to happen…”

"What could happen?"

“Something, anything,” she replies with a shrug, “I just need to know that the safety of the children is the most important thing to both of us. That we are on the same page regarding this. And that you will always prioritize our family, that you will put us before everything else, everyone else even"

Aemond watches her for a few long seconds.

"Alyssa, is there something I should know?"

“No,” she replies very quickly. Too quickly.

"There's something you're not telling me"

She removes her hands from Aemond's and digs her nails into her palms, nervous but unable to say what she must.

“Just a few things I need to confirm,” she ends up saying finally.

"What things…"

“Just promise me, Aemond, please. Now that your brother is king and you are no longer the prince regent, the power game in the Keep must have changed and all of this makes me very anxious. I just need to know that you will believe me, that you will be there for me, and that the children and I are now your family."

She knows that using the argument of losing his rank and power is low, but she needs to divert his attention for now.

“I am the king's brother, I have enough influence to protect the four of us,” he replies, clearly annoyed, “Of course you are my priority. Frankly, Alyssa, we've just come out of a bloody war that I participated in solely to protect you, to be with you when it was all over. And it's over"

No. It's just beginning, but Alyssa doesn't tell him, she just nods and kisses him. She kisses him desperately, her lips moving wildly, her tongue demanding and her arms clinging to Aemond's body, who kisses her back with equal intensity.

***

Alys is waiting for her in one of the castle courtyards the day they leave for King's Landing.

“I'm going to miss you,” the princess says sincerely as she smiles at the woman, “Are you sure I can't convince you to come with me to the capital?”

“My place is here,” Alys nods, “I'm needed here.”

Alyssa sighs. Alys's presence has been comforting these past few weeks, her quiet care and concern, albeit sometimes cryptic, keeping her afloat during Aemond's recovery and as she digested the news regarding her condition.

"I could send a maester here permanently," she proposes, though she knows it's no use, "it would help be so helpful to have a loyal and honest friend by my side in the Red Keep."

“That's a place I won't tread on,” she stares at her and takes her hand in hers, “Trust yourself more, princess. You are a strong, and capable woman, and in addition you have the love and attention of the prince. Don't let fear get the better of you."

Once again, Alys Rivers proved to be able to read her better than she imagined. "Thank you, Alys. I promise that once we are established in King's Landing, I will send whatever is necessary to improve the living conditions here."

"Are you ready?"

Aemond, holding an excited Aegon by the hand, looks at her expectantly.

"Yes, I was saying goodbye to Alys"

“Fare thee well, Alys Rivers,” the prince says solemnly, “You can be sure that your attention and loyalty to us will be rewarded.”

“I was trying to convince her to come with us”

"A losing fight, I assume," Aemond smirks, "While I admit it would be nice to have you in the capital as you have proven yourself more capable than many maesters, I like the idea of having an ally in charge of Harrenhal."

“I belong here,” Alys agrees.

Aegon hugs Alys one last time before rushing his cousin to where Vhagar awaits them.

"See you soon, Alys," the princess also hugs the woman

"Take care, my lady," she replies close to her ear, "And take this with you, in case you need it," Alys places a small glass vial of a colorless substance.

Alyssa looks questioningly at her, and the woman nods before saying quietly, "It works fast and no one will notice its effects."

"Thank you, Alys."

"And have faith, your body could still heal"

Alyssa gives her a sad smile before going in search of the platinum blondes.

***

Aegon does not stop talking during the ride.

Aemond flies low enough for the child to admire the villages and small towns they pass through, as well as some castles, ruins and the enormous riverbed.

"It's more fun to fly than to ride a horse," he cries turning to face Alyssa, who doesn't enjoy the ride as much as her brother, and clings tightly to Aemond's waist, locking her eyes against his back.

"Your sister doesn't like flying too much," he whispers against the boy's ear, a knowing smile playing on their lips.

“Can we touch the river water?”

"No! Egg, it's not a good idea, I'm probably…”

But Aemond has already given the order in High Valyrian to the dragon. Vhagar roars and unleashes a flame that manages to elicit a startled expression from Aegon before she nearly plunges down.

Alyssa suppresses a cry of fear and frustration as she inwardly curses Aemond.

“Hold on tight,” the prince says, turning to her, who prefers not to respond.

Aegon grants his wish to feel the river water and the dragon rises once more, spreading her enormous wings and heading north.

Vhagar roars again as she flies over the castle, but instead of descending, Aemond makes sure that every citizen in the capital has noticed his presence, flying over the alleyways at a dangerous height.

“Completely destroyed,” he mutters as the dragon reaches the dragon pit. And despite the fact that Alyssa's memories of that place were not the most pleasant, her nostalgia and sadness invade her when her mind tries to imagine what happened in that fatidic night.

And it's not just the old building that housed the dragons that has suffered damages. Everything in the city seems to be in disrepair.

“It certainly doesn't look like my brother has been doing much since he regains control,” Aemond comments disapprovingly as they descend outside the Keep and notice that one of the castle gates is smashed.

The soldiers immediately bow to Aemond and the three enter the castle, where they receive curious glances from the servants and find quite a few high-born lords and ladies. Alyssa recognizes several of them, loyal to Aegon since the start of the war.

“I want to see Jaehaera,” Alyssa says as they head to the royal family quarters, “and we must find a suitable room for Aegon.”

"Surely the servants will be able to condition one of the chambers near ours"

"Yes, preferably..."

Alyssa stops talking when a small figure catches her eye. Deep blue eyes gaze at her from the other end of the hall for an instant before the little girl breaks free of her nanny's hand, and runs into Alyssa’s outstretched arms.

“My little princess,” Alyssa says as she takes the girl in her arms, feeling her heart lighten and relief spread through her body, “You have no idea how much I missed you.”

“You said that I would see you soon,” Jaehaera reproaches when Alyssa finally places her on the ground.

"I am so sorry," she replies, wiping away the tears of happiness that the reunion brings to her, "I'm really, really sorry, darling."

“I was brave,” the girl nods, “just like you asked me to”

Alyssa doesn't respond because the girl has now turned her attention to Aemond, hugging him tightly and smiling at him as she caresses his face with her small hand, in a gesture she knows is comforting to the prince.

"Who is she?" asks the small voice of her brother, tugging at the skirt of her dress.

“Oh, right,” Alyssa smiles at the boy, “Aegon, this is Princess Jaehaera. Jaehaera, this is my brother, Prince Aegon."

Her brother, usually vivacious and an extrovert, looks self-conscious when Jaehaera’s blue gaze falls on him. Her searching eyes scan Aegon up and down and a look of sadness crosses the little girl's face for a moment, but she finally gives a polite nod.

"Hello, Prince Aegon," she says, adoringly serious. Alyssa suppresses a smile and wonders where her little girl had learned to reply so appropriately. Probably during her stay at Storm's End.

"Are we family?" the boy asks curiously, eyeing Jaehaera.

“Indeed, yes, you two are…” Alyssa exchanges a look with Aemond. It was her wish that they grow up as siblings, but it wouldn't be that easy to just make the children believe that.

“You are cousins,” Aemond replies.

A guard stops before them at that moment and fixes his gaze on the prince, "The dowager queen requests your presence, my prince."

At the mention of Alicent, the brief bliss she had experienced vanishes, and a sinking feeling in her stomach washes over her.

"Where is my mother?"

“In the king's rooms”

Aemond meets Alyssa's gaze, who raises her eyebrows at him and places her hands on her little brother's shoulders, "We haven't settled in properly yet."

There is the slightest moment of doubt on Aemond's face before he turns to the guard, “Tell my mother I'll go to her later. I have more important matters to attend to at the moment."

The guard obediently nods and disappears into the corridor. Alyssa suppresses a smirk and links her arm through Aemond's as they walk toward Jaehaera's chambers.

Once inside, and surrounded by familiar toys, Aegon drops his sister's skirts and begins to explore the room again. Jaehaera, for her part, continues holding hands with her uncle, silently observing the boy with a mistrustful expression.

"I thought she’d be happy to have a playmate," Aemond whispers close to her ear, his good eye fixed on his niece.

"We must give them time," she replies, "It must be a very strange situation for both of them, besides Egg is used to playing alone with boys, it might be hard for him to have a girl around"

“With how much he complained about being bored in Harrenhal? I doubt it," he says amused.

Alyssa smiles and then kneels down to Jaehaera's level, “Darling, why don't you go play with your cousin?”

"That is my dragonfly," she replies, wrinkling her nose and watching Aegon take the wooden toy, "and it was my brother's."

It is not the first time that she has heard the girl refer to Jaehaerys, but the tone of sadness and anger in her voice touches and surprises her.

“Oh darling, I know, but…” she hesitates, looking at Aegon and then at her niece, “My little brother gets lonely too, you know? And he also had a brother who had to leave”

"Like Jaehaerys?"

“Yes, like Jaehaerys,” Alyssa admits, “Maybe if…”

“Mother left too,” Jaehaera interrupts.

Alyssa notes Aemond's tense reaction, his gaze fixing on the girl, “How do you know that, Jaehaera?”

“Father told me,” she replies with a shrug, “He's very sick.”

Alyssa doesn't know what to say. It's been several months since the girl left the Keep, but it might have seemed much longer because of how old she sounds at the time.

"Yes, well, your mother," Aemond frowns, "she had to leave too."

"Will you leave too?" she asks looking at them both, her blue eyes so much like Helaena's causing a lump to form in Alyssa's throat.

"No, we will never leave you," Aemond promises instantly.

"And he? Will he leave?" tilts her head towards Aegon

“No, he will stay with us,” the prince replies once more.

Jaehaera nods, and moments later she tentatively walks over to Aegon, who offers her a sheepish smile as he watches her approach.

[spookyblazecoffee]

This is literally called “Bye Cam...” in my Google Docs prepared to be sad.

There are two definite times Liam will visit his older brother's grave. Sometimes he’ll go without planning on going that day, but most of the time, he goes on his birthday and Camden’s birthday. Some years, if he finds something that he thinks Camden might’ve liked, he’ll find time on Christmas day and put whatever he found on the grave, after putting stuff in it, or on it, to weigh it down of course.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The first Christmas without Camden

(Winter)

Liam snuck out of the house after everyone had opened their gifts. The cold air hitting his face as he walked towards the cemetery, stuffed bear in his hands. The fishing weights he had sewn into it made him almost drop it multiple times, but it was worth it because his older brother would get a Christmas gift.

After he reached the cemetery he looked for the grave he hadn’t been to since the funeral. When he found it he walked over to it and set the bear down.

“I had mama and David buy him, but I sewed him up myself after I put the weights in him. Mama said I did a good job. I have to get going before they realize I’m gone, but… I wanted you to get a gift.” Liam said to the grave in front of him. “I miss you Cam. Bye.” he added, before walking away.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Camden’s 21st birthday

(Mid Summer)

“I had to mow a ton of yards to get enough money for all of this.” Liam said as he sat down in front of the grave, putting the container with a slice of chocolate cake down on the ground in front of him. The warm sun shining on his face. He put the candle in the cake and lit it with one of the matches he brought. 

“Happy birthday, Cam Cam.” he continued, before blowing the candle out himself, tears spilling past his eyes. He got the plastic forks out of the bag he brought with him, “I know you don’t like to use plastic utensils, but, I couldn’t find anything else.” Liam stated putting one of the forks on the bear he put there last winter.

“Dad would kill me if he saw me crying.” he choked out putting the first bite of the cake in his mouth. Once he finished the piece of cake, he pulled one last thing from his bag. It was a small tiger plush that Camden had growing up. “I found this at a Goodwill, apparently dad had donated her after you died. But look, she’s the exact same one. See? She has the initials C.L. embroidered at the back of her neck. I made sure not to cut over that when I put the dancing weights I got from Lori in her.” Liam said proudly, “Lori told me I could take her old dancing weights when I asked her and Brett if they had anything to weigh something down enough, and mama said I’m getting better at sewing, maybe I’ll be able to make you a gift next time.” he added.

After a little while of Liam talking to the grave he stands up. “I don’t want to go, but I told mama and David that I’d be back by lunchtime.” he told the grave sadly, “I’ll try to come back before dinner though.” he continued, as if trying to cheer up his older brother.

He didn’t have the time to come back that day.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Two weeks before Liam’s 11th birthday

(Late Summer)

Liam ran to the cemetery after school ended, he didn’t get there as soon as he thought he would, but when he did he practically fell down in front of Camden’s grave. “Sorry I’m late. I didn’t think it would take so long to get here.” he said out of breath as he got out his notebook, “I hope it’s okay that I do my homework, I probably won’t have any other time today since Isaac and I are staying at dad’s house tonight. He’s been really different since you died, meaner, angrier, stuff like that y’know?” he added, starting on the social studies homework he got.

“I don’t have much homework, but I still like doing what I do get as soon as I can.” Liam stated after a few minutes of silence.

A red-headed girl and her parents walked around the cemetery until it looked like they found the grave they were looking for. “I wonder if she knows Izzy, she looks around his age, don’t you think so?” Liam asked the grave in front of him, before looking down at his watch, “I have to get going, mama and David are gonna take me and Iz to dad’s house soon.” he added.

“Bye Cam. I miss you.” Liam said after he stood up.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Liam’s 11th birthday

(Early Fall)

“I know it’s my birthday, but, I brought you some flowers.” Liam stated, putting the chrysanthemums on the grave in front of him, “They’re your favorite flowers, Cam.” he added.

“I really miss you.” Liam said, his eyes starting to sting. “Dad started to drink more, he hit Isaac last time we were over there. He yells more too… I don’t like it when he yells, I never have. I wish you could be here to hug me and tell me it will be okay like you used to.” he continued, tears falling from his blue eyes.

“I have to get going now. I’ll come back as soon as I can though.” Liam said, standing up and wiping away the tears.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The second Christmas without Camden

(Winter)

“I couldn’t find anything that you would like at any stores, but I wanted to come anyway.” Liam started, “Sorry I couldn’t come sooner, I was really busy with school and dad doesn’t let Isaac or I leave when we’re at his house. He hit me when I asked to go to Mason’s house with Brett and Lori, I’ve learned to not ask to go anywhere.” he added.

After a while of talking to the grave Liam stood up, “I have to go, mama and David are probably going to get worried soon. David’s sister and her son are joining us this year.” he said, “I really want you to come back Cam Cam.” he continued before turning around and leaving.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The day after Isaac’s 14th birthday

(Early Spring)

“Grandma came over for Izzy’s birthday yesterday, it was nice seeing her. She said that I remind her of you.” Liam said, tears falling down his face, “I miss you so much, and I want you to come back.” he continued, sobs making him shake.

Liam sat there, crying as much as he wanted to, knowing that no one could see him. After a while he stopped crying and just sat there quietly. He felt someone sit down next to him and wrap their arms around him. When he finally looked up he saw his grandma.

“Hey sweetie.” she said softly, “I miss him.” Liam whispered, “I know baby, we all do.” she responded, “And, it’s gonna hurt… for a long time, probably forever. But, he would want you to be happy. Okay?” she added, Liam nods, “Good, now get up, if you’re out here any longer your mom and dad are gonna get worried.” she stated, standing up.

That was the first time someone ever said David was Liam’s dad out loud, and it wouldn’t be the last.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Camden’s 22nd birthday

(Mid Summer)

“I couldn’t find the same type of cake as I did last year, but I got a slice with sprinkles!” Liam said when he got to the grave, “Sorry I took the bear from Christmas back yesterday, but I had the idea to put your initials in the back of his neck and I just had to do it.” he added, putting the bear back in its original spot and lighting the candle.

“Happy birthday, Cam.” he then blew out the candle like he had the year before. He took the first bite of the slice of cake.

“The cake is really good, I think you would like it, Cam.” Liam stated when he finished the slice.

He pulled another stuffed bear from his bag and put it in his lap, “I made her myself, mama said I did a really good job when I showed her. Her name is Isla, y’know, like grandma.” Liam said smiling, “I hope you are okay with me naming her.” he added, setting the bear down next to the one that has been there since the first Christmas without Camden.

“I just remembered, I forgot to tell you the first bear’s name.” Liam said suddenly, “His name is Calum, I thought you would like that I named him after mama’s dad and that I named the other one after mama’s mom.” he added, giggling a little.

A while later he stood up. “I have to leave again, but I’ll visit soon.” he stated before leaving.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The last day of summer vacation

(Summer)

“I’m starting 6th grade tomorrow.” Liam said as he sat down, “Dad, David not y’know, said he might take me here if he gets off of work in time tomorrow.” he added.

“I got a new history book, it has a lot of stuff about different mythologies, I really like it.” Liam states after a bit.

He talks to the grave for a while longer until he has to leave. “Bye Cam, I’ll try to come back tomorrow.” he repeated.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Liam’s 12th birthday

(Early Fall)

“Dad’s sister and her son came over last week.” Liam said, hoping that Cam would understand that when he says dad recently that he means David and not their father, “It’s nice having a cousin, even if we aren’t related.” he added.

Liam sits and talks to his brother for a while, even reading one of the stories from the book he told Cam about the last time he visited.

“Mason, Brett, and I are hanging out next week. It’s nice to have friends that understand everything going on since you died.” Liam said before he left.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The day before Halloween

(Fall)

“I thought I’d visit you today.” Liam stated, sitting down in front of the grave, “I called David ‘dad’ to his face yesterday, I’ve only called him that when talking to you, he was so happy.” he added, smiling.

“I brought you another stuffed animal. I put your initials in the same place as the others too.” Liam said, pulling a small bat out of his backpack, “I told Lori, Brett, and Mason that I visit you a lot, they said that they might join me next time. I also told them about me bringing you stuffed animals, Lori asked me to name the next one after her, so here you go, a stuffed bat named Lori. I’ll probably bring a similar one named Brett next time, if he bothers me enough about it.” he added, laughing a little and placing the bat down next to the tiger.

Liam sits and does his homework until the sun starts to go down. “I have to go, but I’ll try to visit you tomorrow while trick-or-treating.” he commented, before turning and leaving.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The day before Isaac’s 15th birthday

(Early Spring)

“Hey Cam.” Isaac said, “I know it’s been a few weeks since I visited outside of work, but I wanted to come here.” he added, sitting down in front of the grave, looking at the stuffed animals he knows Liam left there. The bears, the tiger, her name is Chrys named after Cam’s favorite flower, and the two bats, all placed so that it looks like they are sitting against the headstone.

Isaac chuckled to himself, Liam had obviously been there recently given that the second bat was new. “I don’t know how he got that other bat. All the stores are out of Halloween themed things.” he stated.

“Liam’s doing fantastic in school. You’d be proud of him.” Isaac said, “He looks so much like you, he doesn’t think so though… He still doesn’t wear his glasses, no matter how much mama, dad, and I ask.” he continued.

“I still laugh at Li’s stupid jokes, but not as much as I should. I laugh like me again though, and h-he laughs like you.” he commented after a few minutes of silence, “Our father has gotten worse, but… as long as he isn’t hurting Liam, y’know?” he whispered, tears starting to roll down his face.

“I have to go, Lacrosse practice… Bye Cam.” he said, getting up to his feet and leaving.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Camden’s 23rd birthday

(Mid Summer)

“I got a chocolate cake slice exactly like the one from two years ago!” Liam exclaimed when he sat down, “Happy birthday, Cam.” he added, before blowing the candle out like he had the previous two years.

Liam reached into the bag he brought with him and pulled out a stuffed lion. “His name is Mason, mostly because Mase wouldn’t stop bugging me about naming a stuffed animal after him, but also because I know how much you loved hanging out with all of my friends. It felt fitting that you hang out with stuffed animals named after them… even if you aren’t here anymore.” he stated, tears slipping past his eyes.

“Why’d you leave me?” he asked, after he sat and cried for a while, “I know that you didn’t want to, but, I miss you so so much. Please, come back.” he added.

Liam cried for a while before standing up. “Bye Cam…” he said then left.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Liam’s 13th birthday

(Early Fall)

“I brought you some chrysanthemums. I’ve grown to love these flowers, I know I didn’t love them as much as you did, but they are really beautiful.” Liam said, sitting down in front of the grave.

“Isaac’s been doing really well at Lacrosse, I want to join the team when I get into high school, so does Brett.” he stated after a while, “I miss our road trips. I don’t think I’ll be able to go on one for a while, maybe never again.” he added.

He sat and talked for a long time before he knew it was time to go home. “Bye Cam, I’ll come back soon!” he said before he got up and left.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 A week after Isaac’s 16th birthday

(Early Spring)

“Our father’s dead, and Isaac has been acting really weird lately… it could be something to do with the death, but he was acting weird before his death so… I don’t know.” Liam said to the grave in front of him, “I wish you were here. No one knows how to comfort me… B-Brett isn’t friends with Mase and I anymore, and I know that sometimes you lose friends a-and there is nothing you can do to st-stop it, but… he’s been friends with us since we were two.” he added, wiping away his tears.

“Bye Cam.” Liam said and walked away.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Almost a week after Brett and Lori die

(Late Summer/Early Fall)

[Liam has visited a lot in between the last visit I wrote and this one, but I didn’t want this to be too long.]

“Hey Cam, sorry my visits have been irregular recently.” Liam said, crying as he sat down, “Brett and Lori are dead. They have been for almost a week. Mason isn’t even doing anything to grieve them, and if he continues not doing anything, he’s going to break down in the middle of a fight against the hunters… and I don’t want to see him like that.” he continued.

Liam grabbed a few rocks from his bag and placed them in front of the grave. “You might be wondering what I’m doing.” Liam stated, “Do you remember the pact Mason, Brett, Lori, and I made when we were younger? Y’know, the one where we said that when any of us died the others would find a place of significance and place rocks in front of it?” he asked, “Well, this is a place of significance, according to all of us, not just me. Mason has his own place in mind, he didn’t forget.” he added.

“I don’t know what to do without you or them, or anyone that I love and care for… I’m scared, Cam. I’m so scared.” he stated, “Scared that Jordan might die. Scared that Mason might die. Scared that everyone that I love will die, and I will be the only one left. I don’t want that to happen. I don’t want to be alone, I hate being alone. I need you to come back, just for a minute, I need you to tell me I’ll be alright.” he continued, as it started to rain.

The tent someone, probably Isaac, set up protecting the stuffed animals from getting wet. Liam looked at all of the stuff he made, or bought, and left there with teary eyes.

“I want my big brother back. I want my friends back.” Liam said.

He stood up when he got a text. “I have to go again.” he stated, “Mama texted, I’ll come back when I have the time. Bye Cam…” he added, picking up his bag and leaving.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A week and six days after the zoo, the day before Liam’s 17th birthday

(Early fall)

“Hey, this isn’t like last year, I can’t do anything to save anyone. I tried killing someone the other day. I can’t control my anger no matter how hard I try, and I’ve been having these nightmares. I can’t sleep because of them.” Liam said, “Only one person can help me with my anger, and I don’t even like him. D’you remember me telling you about Theo Raeken? Because apparently, he’s the only one who can help me. If you were here you could help, so please come back… please Cam.” he added.

“I don’t want to be in this town anymore. I don’t want to be anywhere anymore.” Liam stated after a few minutes of silence. Tears start to run down his face and silent sobs make his body shake. There was a sound nearby and he immediately jumped up.

“Hey Liam.” Theo said, “Go away, Theo.” Liam yelled, “Not this time.” the older one retaliated, “Why not?” the shorter asked, “Were you following me?” he added, “Yes, I was. I’m sorry.” the taller answers, stepping closer to the other.

“Go away. Please.” Liam started, backing away, “You didn’t let me tell you why I won’t.” Theo stated, Liam stared expectantly, “You are clearly upset, and I don’t want you to be sad.” he added, “Why are you sad?” he asked.

Liam stayed silent for a while.

“My friends are dead, I couldn’t protect them, a-and I’m scared that everyone else that I love and care about is gonna die too. So I came and cried in front of my brother’s grave! Okay?” Liam yelled, “Okay.” Theo responded, “I’m sorry I yelled, I’ve been trying to work on that.” Liam said, “I know, Liam.” Theo stated.

Liam sat back down, and Theo stood behind him not sure what to do. “You can sit down if you want. I don’t care.” Liam uttered after a while.

Theo sat down next to Liam silently.

“I’m pretty sure my sister is buried here.” Theo said after they had been silent for a few minutes, “Almost everyone who lived and died in this town is.” Liam responded, “Oh yeah?” Theo asked, “Yup, I spent most of my childhood here, I would know.” Liam answered, “Most of your childhood. How much do you visit your brother?” the taller questioned, “A lot, but I also spent a lot of time here because my father owned it.” the younger replied.

“If you want I could point out a few graves. Maybe even your sister’s.” Liam said after almost an hour, “Really?” Theo questioned, “Yeah. It would distract me from everything going on.” Liam answered, “Go ahead then.” Theo replied.

Liam stood up and Theo followed suit.

Liam walked over to the grave that he knew was the one he saw the red-headed girl and, sometimes, her parents had visited multiple times since he first saw them.

“Lorraine Martin…” Theo said, “Lydia’s grandma, I saw her and her parents visiting a couple times growing up, her parents don’t come as often as she does though.” Liam stated, walking over to another grave.

They walked around for another thirty minutes before they heard a police car pull up. “Shit.” Liam said, “Get out of the cemetery, it’s closed!” a voice yelled, “One minute Jordan!” Liam yelled back.

A few seconds later Jordan Parrish ran up to them. “Liam? What’re you doing here?” he asked, “I was originally visiting Cam, but Theo was following me, so I told him I could find his sister’s grave. We already saw it, but I need to do one more thing.” Liam answered, “Okay, be quick, I don’t want to get in trouble.” Jordan responded.

Liam walked over to the grave he was sitting at when Theo found him. He placed a stuffed animal at the headstone. “I made him, named him after Mason’s boyfriend, thought you might want to get to know him before we all die. His name is Corey. Bye Cam...” Liam said.

As they left Theo made sure to catch a glimpse at the stuffed animal Liam had set down. It was a chameleon. Theo chuckled to himself as he drove Liam back to his house.

[sadhoglet]

I had some time to kill before my therapy appointment so I went to the pet store across from my job and saw the bunnies and the fish

I almost started crying at how beautiful and soft everything is, especially all the coral in the aquariums. If I wasn't in public I definitely would have.

The ocean is one of the few places I consistently feel at peace. I hope I can live by the water one day, if only a lake or a stream.

I think work, and the people there, have been reminding me more and more of how fucked up and damaged I am and that's why I can't be there anymore. It used to be a nice distraction but now people who have hurt me and excluded me are there almost every day.

I'm tempted to skip out on my last two weeks tbh, it's gotten really bad and I'm afraid I'm going to just lose it one day and tell everyone exactly how I feel about them before walking out. I have these really ugly thoughts about some people and l...yeah. But I don't want to burn the goodwill I have with the other half of the people there who are actually great and whom I enjoy being around. Ugh. I just get this intense guilt whenever I feel like I'm letting other people down, or people are depending on me.

I guess I could go to the pet store after work every day as a reward for myself. I'm a little sad I haven't gone more often before. Soon I won't be working across the street from a little soft slice of the ocean. And that makes me want to cry, too.

[lightlycareless]

chapter 32 finally here,,, im so late getting this ask in but this chap HAS been rolling around in my head,, getting chewed on ,,

we got SO much backstory in this one to work with and its SO cute too- like, not only does it work as such a good narrative contrast to the current relationship going on, what with eiichi and minako actually being able to have 1) respectful disagreements over taste 2) REAL playful banter that doesn't end up in some sort of argument or with horrifyingly thick tension 3) most importantly both people want to be there and see more of each other- its also just a very very sweet scene overall

AND it goes on to even show him properly standing up for her, supporting her career, sweet gift exchanges,,, n naoya is just cringing at the end of it. you FOOL. you should be taking NOTES rn

(also y/n met naoya first at the goodwill event,,, that has to have been mentioned before but i blanked on it till now. god. i hope we see that at some point i can only imagine)

y/n i think you SHOULD have just started crying in the store there after the story. just start sobbing. freak him out a little bit. he deserves it

naoya trying to ask genuine questions for once (at least i think he is!! just not,, really coming thru in the tone of voice but hes giving it a go) and just getting. almost entirely ignored. hes TRYING your honor- and what did he BUY?? what is in his pocket i know it cant be a whole record that would not FIT

this whole chapter and the last couple are SO funny bc y/n is (understandably) assuming he's being purposely malicious in ignoring/misunderstanding her and girlie,,, he's just that stupid actually. like he IS an asshole but also? very stupid. he is not getting the signals you are sending and when he does its like a funhouse mirror version his ass does NOT get it!!

"you like sweets?" "how do you know,,," "i figured after you ate a lot of cake at our wedding" "*oh my god,,, he's been watching me so closely,,, hes been stalking me*" GIRL,,, THIS IS THE MOST NORMAL BEHAVIOR HES DISPLAYED. the paranoia (again, understandably) is kicking our ASS rn okay this all makes sense actually rereading the next section like yes. it IS a nice fairly normal gesture of being attentive to what someone likes UNTIL its the last guy on earth you want being aware of you at all EXACTLY

the next few scenes REALLY make the contrast between their and y/n's parents relationship so dramatic bc like i was saying- the banter is just SO different because they do not actually trust each other here. that and its got a very different theme to it- the hiding it under the kimono comment would not have gone well with ANY woman i imagine. "meant it as nothing more than a joke, obviously" NOT OBVIOUSLY MY MAN

and of course,,, the final bit,,, handing the sweets over to naoaki instead,,,, i can not even IMAGINE how chp 33 is gonna start. hes just gonna straight up fall to his knees right there in anguish. pass out maybe. y/n and naoaki having a lighthearted little chat while naoya sobs and dies five feet away. i can't wait. incredible chapter once again

Hello!!

Aww, don't worry! If anything I should be apologizing for being a bit late to reply 😅 stuff happened, but I'm finally here hehe! And overall, I'm super happy this chapter was to your liking, since I love writing backstories... although I'm self conscious from time to time about it because it might be considered boring or irrelevant—and I get it, sometimes we just wanna know what's going on with the main plotline, but at the same time… I’ve been wanting to give certain characters more context. Especially Eiichi and Minako, who hold a special place in my heart. though I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again!! they’re PERFECT, OK?? They’re nothing but loving, caring, understanding and everything in between... and it's my favorite trope of all time!!! I eat that shit up every single time idc it never gets old for me!!!

Ahem.... anyways lol.

The scene that heavily resonated with me of all that occurred in this chapter has to be how Eiichi and Minako were beyond excited to have children... because comparing it to Y/N and Naoya... it's very sad.

If Y/N were to get pregnant somehow, his reaction would certainly be negative. However, there’s a catch with this specific topic which I’ll develop a bit more in the future hehe. But yeah, she's definitely not living her parent's story, not even close.

And same. I’m really disappointed in Naoya’s reaction too, but what did we expect… it’s not like he’s going to suddenly understand the value of this information 😭😭😭😭 Our emotionless little trash bag could never... Ugh, I would be ashamed to even cringe if someone shared me something so intimate… he could’ve at least been a bit more discreet about it 😭 didn’t he get some kind of training in how to behave in these types of situations??? Like from the elders or something??? Since he’s the heir, you know… ??? Guess not.

As for the goodwill event, I’ve only sprinkled mentions here and there :> I think the first one was when Y/N told she saw Naoaki’s technique (same as Naoya’s) in said event, which was coincidentally Naoya’s first event lol. I only remember this cause I recently re-read the chapter where it happens 😂 I’m starting to forget some things… oof. Anyways, Worry not, this moment will be in the story 😊

Omg imagine if she started crying?? I think Naoya would somehow manage to make the situation even worse 😂. Kind of those awkward pats in the back, tell her “if I buy you something will you stop crying?” like she was a child or something lmao—and y/n would definitely be like “Are you serious????”

Overall, Naoya needs to try harder. Waaaay harder. But more than that… he needs to be accountable for the things he’s done—Y/N is not reacting positively to him because he’s just out there acting as if nothing happened! Or if he somehow acknowledged that it did, he still feels like he's blaming her for it, like it's her fault for overreacting to his abuse, and then blaming his brother over it!

Ughhhhhhhhhhhh Naoya needs to wake up, seriously!! I really don’t know what he needs to see or hear to finally understand he’s the problem 😭😭😭😭 And Ranta isn’t of much help either… but maybe he’s doing all that because he knows how he is hahah that he won’t react outside of essentially being compliant to him 😅 being Naoya’s “friend” must be a nightmare.

And with the whole Naoya being attentive to her is reminds me of this meme lol

Just something I noticed while drafting, I tend to use the same phrases when writing their dialogue—it’s kind of sick, isn’t it? I’m tormenting Y/N all ways possible LMAO. (this is actually something I’m very self-conscious about… please forgive me 😭 Also damn I wish I had a FC for Naoaki... I mean I do but I want to reveal that on the character profile hehe)

But yeah, being reminded of that is like... you're already freezing, and someone decides to throw you another bucket of ice. You're like damn???? was that necessary?? She certainly didn't need to be told that he's keeping a closer watch. (Ah... if only the circumstances had been different, I would've been like... oh, how sweet of him) YIKES.

Now that we’re talking about the differences between their relationship towards Eiichi and Minako, it made me wonder how she would take that comment if it had been them instead.

I think Minako would be either like "what are you babbling about?" at first. HOWEVER, if she’s feeling kind of frisky and we know she be like that with him lol, I think she’d say something instead like “There’s something else I’d like under my kimono” and Eiichi would just, yeah. short circuit. 9 months later, Hinata came to be. HAHAHAHAHAH

It’s all in the context really, some couples are more comfortable with certain topics, others are not and the only way to establish that is through communication—unfortunately, even though Naoya and Y/N may be married, they’re not a couple by any means 😭😂. So yeah, that was waaaay out of pocket. I would’ve slapped him if I didn't have to fear for my life immediately afterwards 😭😅😂

As for the next chapter... if he passes out by seeing Naoaki and Y/N… good. It’s what he deserves 😊 Although something else is going to happen that I think will certainly rattle him—oh, whoops. Spoilers. 🤪🤪 (I’m really excited for you to read that chapter jkahgjkajgkaj)

Anyways, thank you so much for coming back for another update!! I know I always tell you this, but I don't think I can ever, ever write down how truly grateful I am to have your support... 🥺❤️ I'm always looking forward to your comments, hehe, they're very motivating, inspiring, sometimes fun to read... overall, I greatly enjoy them—they've certainly made writing this fic more fun ❤️❤️❤️

I hope you have a wonderful rest of the week, take care, and hope to see you soon!!!

[logicalstansadvice]

If he started dating either of them, all the fangirls who had goodwill towards them and shipped them will switch up, and they will suddenly start caring about Daisy's age, Lily's scandalous past entanglements, etc. // Go to the head of the class. This is EXACTLY it. They will absolutely trash whoever he gets with, with whatever trifling excuses they can find (omg, now he's being shackled with jewelry?! The horror!) and claim he's just overcome with grief that he's chained (with an actual gold chain?!) to The Contract. They've always done it, which is why the recent rebranding of Margo as "the one who got away" is hilarious because they couldn't stand that girl either.

The claim now that Seb just needs to find a girl "who loves him for who he really is" is disingenuous at best, and very y/n and Reader!Insert! as far as I see it. It's giving "pick me, choose me, love me!"

A grip needs to be got, for crying out loud.

Anon 2: Their latest comment says the real gf jumped ship already / because of the rings, they said 🤣 while he 1) had the ring since August, you can see it on Podcrushed video and 2) it's not matching with AW's old Cartier ring anyway. Oh, and their comments on Drew were an instant giveaway as well - at no point him and AW had a romantic rs, he's gay and they've been besties for 10+ years.

Anon 3: "What struck me recently is that some of these people sound like the stereotype mother ... They claim not to baby him but don’t trust his judgement or respect his choices." Except isn't babying usually less sinister toward the "baby"? A lot of these people are just horrific talking about Seb too. We need some new words because the psychology of this situation has evolved into next-level weirdness IMO.

Anon 4: I like the anons asking questions on here! Everything they’ve said is 100% true and it also applies to the recent whack ass Chris and Alba thing. She’d be a pretty safe option for the fangirls. Usually younger, not like super model giant person almost unknown. and yet… they hate her, and she is fake and just not good. 🤣 Its so funny but also kind of sad. One terrible thing about social media is this shift in parasocial interactions.

Anon 5: Ngl I really can't understand why some people are so invested in his private life. They say they don't like Annabelle (now it's Annabelle, tomorrow who knows) and then proceed to watch her every move. I bet many of them -like me- didn't even know her before her rs with Seb, and I feel like they don't realize they cross a certain line: one thing is not liking someone, another one is hating/talking shit/making fun of and making up theories just to convince themselves that it's all pr. Also, they subtly blame Seb bc his previous relationships didn't work and psychoanalyze him def way too much. This narrative is really sickening. Idk, I wish I had all that free time they have.

💄