borderline *ೃ༄ fem!reader x emily prentiss
somewhere along the way, the lines separating friends and lovers blur together.
“emily?” you call out, walking out of the bedroom and feeling something brush against your leg. “oh, hello sergio.”
you bend down to pet the small kitten, scooping him up in your arms as he purrs. “where’s your mom, baby?”
“right here,” you hear, prompting you to turn around as a smile stretches on your lips at the familiar voice, “i was in the other room. hotch called.”
your smile falters, knowing what was next. “you’re leaving?”
reluctantly, she nods. “i’m meeting them at the plane though, so i have some time.” she tries to alleviate your disappointment, stepping closer to you.
you let sergio roam free, watching him walk around emily’s calves, meowing softly.
she steps even closer. casually, her lips brush against yours, a smile that mirrors yours lighting up her face. “i’m on vacation next week.”
you breathe a laugh, “last time you said that we had to cancel our trip to hawaii.”
arms circle around your neck, lips so close you’re tempted to lean in for another kiss.
emily knows she doesn’t have any more excuses.
she also knows you’ll see through every one of her bullshit lies.
“if i say it’s a non-refundable trip, i might have some leeway.” she grins, not able to resist the upturn of your lips, leaning in to capture your grin with hers.
you pull away, rolling your eyes. “you wouldn’t do that to your team.”
“i’d do it for you.” she replies, not missing a beat.
and you’re stunned. because this is emily.
emily as in ‘i-can’t-commit-to-relationships’ emily.
and from what you’re hearing, she’s beginning to tiptoe over the clear boundaries you both had made.
but you only smile bashfully, seeming to not mind as you succumb to her flirting. “you’re too much, emily.”
she grins in reply, “you love it.”
sergio meows, stepping between you guys. he lays down and you both look at each other.
“someone was feeling left out.” you say.
emily chuckles, bending down to pick him up. “so spoiled,” she kisses his head, “i wonder who made him like this.”
you kiss her cheek, soft and quick, but it speaks volumes. “like mother like son.”
“emily?” you call, hearing keys jingle and familiar footsteps sounding within your apartment.
she rounds the corner and you smile, eyes crinkling solely at the sight of her. “emily!”
she chuckles, situating herself in your living room.
emily nods toward your laptop. “what are you working on?”
you sigh, “don’t even get me started,” you push the device away from you, letting your head fall onto your table, “work has me doing the job of two people.”
“what?” she says, coming toward you. “what’s up with that?”
“i’m supposed to be working on this with one of my colleagues. it’s a presentation we’re going to give to the HR managers at the end of the month.” you meet her gaze, then her lips, before continuing, “and my partner is deadweight.”
“that’s horrible, baby.” she replies, “can you ask to be with someone else?”
you shrug, “probably. but it’s not a big deal—i already finished ninety percent of it… and it’s not even like it’s world-impacting work. i don’t mind doing it on my own.”
“that doesn’t matter,” emily says, “if you’re paired up with someone, they’re expected to do their share of the work, babe. but i get it,” she presses a kiss to your forehead, and it’s so casual it feels like she’s your girlfriend. “just say something next time?”
you nod, a little dazed. “i will.”
she manages to pull you away from work, luring you into the comfort of your bed. you had your head resting on her arm, cuddled into her side.
you feel yourself drifting off.
it feels right to be sleeping next to her.
“would you hate me if i asked this question?” you mumbled, hiding your face.
emily hums, holding you a little bit tighter. “i’d never hate you.”
“but what if i said i wanted us to be official?”
she doesn’t reply and your chest sinks. you sigh, shutting your eyes. “forget it.”
“no!” she exclaims, soft and almost unsure. “i want us to be official too.”
your eyes are still closed. “so what’s stopping us?”
emily rubs your shoulder, contemplating her answer. she exhales softly, kissing your head.
“you know what i do for a living... i didn’t want to put you in danger.” she whispers, “i’m worried that i can’t keep you safe.”
“you don’t need to worry about that, em.” you reply quietly. “just worry about waking up next to me for the rest of your life.”
she laughs, quiet and little bashful. “i’d definitely be worried with the breakfast you make—if you can even call it that.”
“hey!” you chide playfully, “that was a one time thing.”
“yeah,” she retorts, “because i took over breakfast after that.”
you tilt your head up to see her beaming. you lean up and cup her face in your hands, capturing her lips with yours. “stay with me?”
she chases your lips. “i’m not going anywhere.”
you’re sitting in the passenger side, hand intertwined with emily’s. the radio is quietly humming through your car, filling the silence.
“i’m nervous.” you admit, although she already knew.
emily only smiles. “you look beautiful, don’t worry.”
“aren’t you worried your mom’s gonna kill us?” you whisper, thumb gently running over her hand.
“she’ll get over it.” emily says, shrugging, “she’s had to get over worse.”
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i feel like not enough ppl are factoring in the cultural clash between laios and shuro and the many micro agressions shuro faced while being in their group. literally the name 'shuro' in itself is one
his name is toshiro 😭 lets also not forget that he has his own communication issues, in the opposite way that laios does- thats literally a factor in their argument, that his envy for laios's ability to express himself sincerely manifested as part of his distaste for him.
ig all this to say like, was their fight heart wrenching, especially when reading laios as autistic? absolutely. anybody whos ever been in laios's position knows how much it hurts to realize someone you thought was your friend doesnt actually like having you around, especially when they didnt tell you and you had no way of knowing due to not understanding their cues. but im begging yall to step back and see the nuance of this situation cause im gonna be real a lot of you are kinda just brushing over it acting like everything is toshiros fault and that hes a terrible person when in reality hes an average guy who really, really clashed with laios and it led to a very long misunderstanding due to their supremely opposite methods of communication. even laios and toshiro, after letting everything out in their fight, were able to come to an understanding and start a foundation for an actual friendship built on better communication
ok yknow what Edit: i shouldve made it even more explicit at the end of this post, i hadnt thought i would need to since i started the post with this, but i think a few too many people are missing my point so i just wanna clarify. i shouldnt have said 'really clashed' and left it at that because yeah they did, but it wasnt just their opposite methods of communication, it is also very much that toshiro was experiencing microaggressions via laios. it may have been unintentional on laios's part, but it still happened and wore him down, made it harder for him to communicate on top of both the more subtle social cues that he was raised with and his own communication difficulties. i also want to say that the fandom reaction to toshiro and the complete ignorance of this point is also racist tbh or at the very least ignorant. i understand that the anime did not cover this panel, and neither did the manga, as this was an omake, but im gonna be real with you guys. there are enough context clues within the story to clue you into this. if you didnt pick up on it thats ok, but i think this is a good lesson in picking up subtext in the stories that youre watching and/or reading. kui shouldnt have to explicitly say 'by the way laios was racist to toshiro' for this point to be understood, and at the very least, when the author portrays a character in a sympathetic light (as kui clearly does) it should make you question Why they are doing so and what makes them sympathetic, rather than youre immediate and only reaction to be 'well i hated what this guy did/said so i hate them and they suck'. idk exactly how to finish this, just. idk. question your biases and gut reactions to things you see in media and stories, and think about whether or not theres subtext that youre missing.
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you're grabbing lunch with a nice man and he gives you that strange grimace-smile that's popular right now; an almost sardonic "twist" of his mouth while he looks literally down on you. it looks like he practiced the move as he leans back, arms folded. he just finished reciting the details of NFTs to you and explaining Oppenheimer even though he only watched a youtube about it and hasn't actually seen it. you are at the bottom of your wine glass.
you ask the man across from you if he has siblings, desperately looking for a topic. literally anything else.
he says i don't like small talk. and then he smiles again, watching you.
a few years ago, you probably would have said you're above celebrity gossip, but honestly, you've been kind of enjoying the dumb shit of it these days. with the rest of the earth burning, there's something familiar and banal about dragging ariana grande through the mud. you think about jeanette mccurdy, who has often times gently warned the world she's not as nice as she appears. you liked i'm glad my mom died but it made you cry a lot.
he doesn't like small talk, figure out something to say.
you want to talk about responsibility, and how ariana grande is only like 6 days older than you are - which means she just turned 30 and still dresses and acts like a 13 year old, but like sexy. there's something in there about the whole thing - about insecurity, and never growing up, and being sexualized from a young age.
people have been saying that gay people are groomers. like, that's something that's come back into the public. you have even said yourself that it's just ... easier to date men sometimes. you would identify as whatever the opposite of "heteroflexible" is, but here you are again, across from a man. you like every woman, and 3 people on tv. and not this guy. but you're trying. your mother is worried about you. she thinks it's not okay you're single. and honestly this guy was better before you met, back when you were just texting.
wait, shit. are you doing the same thing as ariana grande? are you looking for male validation in order to appease some internalized promise of heteronormativity? do you conform to the idea that your happiness must result in heterosexuality? do you believe that you can resolve your internal loneliness by being accepted into the patriarchy? is there a reason dating men is easier? why are you so scared of fucking it up with women? why don't you reach out to more of them? you have a good sense of humor and a big ol' brain, you could have done a better job at online dating.
also. jesus christ. why can't you just get a drink with somebody without your internal feminism meter pinging. although - in your favor (and judgement aside) in the case of your ariana grande deposition: you have been in enough therapy you probably wouldn't date anyone who had just broken up with their wife of many years (and who has a young child). you'd be like - maybe take some personal time before you begin this journey. like, grande has been on broadway, you'd think she would have heard of the plot of hamlet.
he leans forward and taps two fingers to the table. "i'm not, like an andrew tate guy," he's saying, "but i do think partnership is about two people knowing their place. i like order."
you knew it was going to be hard. being non-straight in any particular way is like, always hard. these days you kind of like answering the question what's your sexuality? with a shrug and a smile - it's fine - is your most common response. like they asked you how your life is going and not to reveal your identity. you like not being straight. you like kissing girls. some days you know you're into men, and sometimes you're sitting across from a man, and you're thinking about the power of compulsory heterosexuality. are you into men, or are you just into the safety that comes from being seen with them? after all, everyone knows you're failing in life unless you have a husband. it almost feels like a gradebook - people see "straight married" as being "all A's", and anything else even vaguely noncompliant as being ... like you dropped out of the school system. you cannot just ignore years of that kind of conditioning, of course you like attention from men.
"so let's talk boundaries." he orders more wine for you, gesturing with one hand like he's rousing an orchestra. sir, this is a fucking chain restaurant. "I am not gonna date someone who still has male friends. also, i don't care about your little friends, i care about me. whatever stupid girls night things - those are lower priority. if i want you there, you're there."
he wasn't like this over text, right? you wouldn't have been even in the building if he was like this. you squint at him. in another version of yourself, you'd be running. you'd just get up and go. that's what happens on the internet - people get annoyed, and they just leave. you are locked in place, almost frozen. you need to go to the bathroom and text someone to call you so you have an excuse, like it's rude to just-leave. like he already kind of owns you. rudeness implies a power paradigm, though. see, even your social anxiety allows the patriarchy to get to you.
you take a sip of the new glass of wine. maybe this will be a funny story. maybe you can write about it on your blog. maybe you can meet ariana grande and ask her if she just maybe needs to take some time to sit and think about her happiness and how she measures her own success.
is this settling down? is this all that's left in your dating pool? just accepting that someone will eventually love you, and you have to stop being picky about who "makes" you a wife?
you look down to your hand, clutching the knife.
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