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#no im not thinking too much about how Alex is looking at Jack what do you mean#actually yes I am in fact losing my mind nvm#fUCK#thinking thoughts#my heart hurts#i love them so bad :(#kalina answers#jalex#alex#jack#Alex Gaskarth#Jack Barakat#Jalex barakarth#all time low
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riz gukgak the type of ‘the end justifies the means’ guy who’s gotten real lucky that so far the best possible means to his ends have happened to mostly align themselves to the side of overall good
#maybe im being too cynical but im not trying to be im just so deeply intrigued by this guy .#does this make sense . it makes sense to me . like his means have been mostly good (as vague as that can be) but that’s because they were#the smartest course of action . explodes and dies#im obsessed with him truly . terrible time to get obsessed with a new blorbo i literally have four essays due still#that one meme where it’s like ‘I’m probably x but i got college so i don’t have time for it’ but the adhd is forcing me to hyperfixate anw#god im sooo . im so . anyone else think about the scene in hell with kalina . anyone think about when fig asked him what was up he didn’t#answer her . because he knew if he did he’d lose his in with kalina . and then he went off with her without telling anyone#because she had something he wanted and he was prepared to do incredibly dumb shit for . anyone think about how she saw enough of something#within him to try and tempt him to join her side . anyone think about when biz did the same thing in s1 . what would have happened if siding#with those two as means to his desired end Had been the smarter more logical choice . huh . anyone think about that#like it would come into conflict with his other values like how much he cares for his friends . but there WOULD be a conflict . and thatd be#juicy af#im going to collapse into a heap . 2:30 am and this is only the tip of the riz thoughts iceberg#this is pretty isn’t pretty olivia rodrigo’s fault . fuck#jay rambles#my random posting probably seems deranged like why this bitch posting about fhigh all of a sudden 🤨 <- put it on in the bg while doing uni#work and got far far too invested
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You know what genuinely kept me up until 1am last night about FH: Junior Year, the Bad Kids could have been facing such worse enemies if Porter actually thought about who would be best in Kipperlily’s place.
My mind goes directly to Ragh or Hargis, both very powerful kids who were in pretty bad situations. Ragh was wrapped up with the Harvest Men and in denial about his sexuality. Wait I forgot, Porter did try and mess with Ragh with his silly "Barbarian healing", would Porter have tried some shit if the Bad Kids hadn't taken Ragh on Summer break with them? I’m thankful every day the Bad Kids took him in. Hargis in turn also could have dodged a bullet by meeting the Bad Kids. Like a shy theatre nerd that struggles socially with his passion, who is a Goliath fighter no less is a recipe for (not necessarily hate-filled) but a rage-filled disaster. That beige aura really did good for him I think.
AND WHAT ABOUT YELL. Danielle would have been in so much trouble if she didn’t find the Maidens. A socially ostracised girl that can’t find a permanent adventuring party because of her beliefs and actions gets tricked into using her druidic powers to spread the rage-star powder all across Elmville. I am shaking Porter’s shoulders violently rn, BRO. A DRUID. YOU SKIPPED ON A DRUID FOR YOUR EVIL PLAN OML.
Zayn also could have been bad news if Porter got his shit together faster for a similar reason. He. Is. A. Necromancer. A necromancer. And probably one of the most vulnerable people from season 1, just one discussion with Daybreak and it’s a sealed deal but noooo. Please don’t get me wrong, I don’t want any of the students to be brainwashed or even be in the position to willingly take the rage, but man, Porter is just ridiculous.
Holy shit. And what about Zelda. A character so powerful I think that’s one of the reason Brennan played her in The Seven. Her rage is literally divine, Porter could have done something with that, made his own brand of divine rage and offered it to her and others. She was even taking personal lessons from him because her rage was too destructive for normal class.
When the hell did he come up with this plan.
I mean I know it would have been a while ago because of the whole thing with Kalina but I think my point still stands when I say, Porter, my guy, disrespectfully, you could have done so much better than Kipperlily Copperkettle.
#fantasy high junior year#fantasy high#fhjy#ragh barkrock#hargis#danielle barkstock#zayn darkshadow#zelda donovan#porter cliffbreaker#dimension 20#d20#i will never be over this show and its wonderful characters#i will always be over porter's bullshit#no muscles will ever be big enough to hide the fact the mans brain is as smooth as silk and the size of a grape
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GFL girls watching a horror movie with their S/O?
yeah I rewatched emesis blue and I need to see other people get scared
(GFL) Kalina, Helianthus, G36, AK-15, RPK-16, Architect, Scarecrow, M16A1, G11, and HK416 watching a horror movie with their S/O
I just finished watching Stasis: Bone Totem for the past 7 hours personally. I'm sad now.
Kalina happily snuggles next to S/O, eating popcorn as S/O held onto her for dear life.
She wasn't that troubled by the horror movie they put on.
Mostly because it gave her some fantastic ideas for Halloween this year!
(S/O) "K-Kalina, why are you smiling?!"
(Kalina) "Hm...I think I can recreate that with some of the T-Dolls, the way we can utilize our stealth tech can make one helluva haunted mansion!"
(S/O) "You're going to monetize ghosts?!"
(Kalina) "Heck yeah, I am!"
She does jump at a few of the scares but laughs them off.
Helian can't help but wonder if this is what the younger couples did nowadays. Or rather, if they still did this kind of thing.
She sat with S/O in the darkness, huddled up next to them on the couch as the TV provided their entertainment for the night.
(Helianthus) "I doubt that this movie will be that scary."
It in fact, was that scary.
Some of the scares get Helian to scream, latching onto S/O.
Which she immediately tries to clear her throat and preserve some dignity.'
(Helianthus) "...Tell anyone about this, and you're a dead man/woman."
G36 has to put on her glasses in order to watch the film properly.
She couldn't help but fidget a little, she wasn't used to just...sitting down and doing nothing.
But admittedly, it was a nice change of pace.
G36 flinches at some of the scares, but she can't help but laugh at least a little, making sure S/O was comfortable.
Or more accurately, not scared out their mind.
(G36) "You are shaking a lot. Do you require warmer blankets?"
(S/O) "N-NO! Just...s-stay here, don't leave me alone!"
(G36) "Necromorphs are not real-"
(S/O) "C-Can we make sure the vents are locked tight tonight?"
G36 just smiles at that.
15 doesn't really understand why S/O is watching horror movies if they were scared of it.
If this was just some elaborate ruse just for 15 to hold them tightly, they could've just asked her directly.
Regardless, she obliges them because it made them happy.
She doesn't react in the slightest to any of the scares, finding the whole concepts of ghosts and spirits illogical.
(AK-15) "You know they don't exist S/O. Why are you so afraid?"
(S/O) "I-I don't know! It just freaks me out, alright?!"
She notices their heartbeat calms down at least a little if her arms are wrapped around them, which she comfortably holds them in her grasp the duration of the movie and night.
At least they trusted her strength so much, they believed she could punch a demon back to hell.
That makes her pride go up an substantial amount, though she doesn't vocalize it.
Otherwise, she doesn't flinch from a single thing in the movie, even the more grotesque parts.
16 is highly amused the entire time, watching as S/O is latching onto her during the movie.
She also can't help but wonder why humans would make something so strange.
Did they want to be scared? Was the human race nothing but masochists?
(RPK-16) "Why exactly did we choose this type of movie tonight, S/O? You seem to be trembling."
(S/O) "Well, I thought it'd be fun..."
(RPK-16) "Hm, well it gives me a few ideas on how to get some interesting reactions out of you at least."
For the remainder of the night, she has a smug grin on her face as S/O squirms and yelps from the scares.
She began to ponder on what exactly S/O was afraid of. The girl with long hair, the loud noises? This was going to be a fun time experimenting!
She isn't affected by the movie at all, save for getting ideas to scare S/O.
Architect is absolutely terrified with S/O, making her almost drop the bucket of popcorn and candy she has.
(Architect) "AGH! DID YOU SEE THAT?!"
(S/O) "W-WHAT?! NO, WHAT?!"
Like S/O, she gets way too immersed in the film and the both of them are shaking in fear.
When they go to bed, Architect has her weapon directly next to the bedside, with S/O making no complaints.
(Architect) "I-If any demon bastard wants to go through that door, they'll be blown the hell up!"
(S/O) "...Wait, this is my room. Why did you have that in here to begin with-"
(Architect) "For situations like these! I don't wanna be killed by some ghost!"
Scarecrow finds this whole ordeal illogical. She doesn't get scared by anything, let alone by human entertainment.
The reason why S/O called her to watch these escaped her, but it's not like she had anything better to do.
She blankly stares at the screen as she feels S/O hug her tightly, her irises adjusting to the brightness of the screen.
Her voice remains monotone the entire time, slightly muffled by her mask.
(Scarecrow) "...Do I scare you as much as the scarecrow in this film, S/O?"
(S/O) "Um...Not really, you're a lot cuter.-"
Her eyes glanced over to S/O, noticing that they weren't teasing, mostly due to being afraid.
She finds amusement in their terror, but doesn't make a comment on their compliment.
(Scarecrow) "That is obvious."
(S/O) "UWAGH!?"
Scarecrow is held even tighter, making her sigh. Why are humans like this?
M16 just smirks when S/O asks her to watch a horror movie with them.
(M16A1) "Don't worry, I'm so bad that not even any monster will come near me!"
She puffs her chest out in pride when S/O finds comfort in her arms.
(M16A1) "Psh, I could beat the hell out of that blue demon."
(S/O) "B-But that's a supernatural ghost! You can't shoot ghosts!"
(M16A1) "I can sure try!"
She has the biggest smile on her face, just getting to enjoy this moment with S/O.
She's not really affected by the scares in the movie, just finding it funny more than anything.
G11 would be fast asleep if S/O didn't wake her up from their screaming.
The entire time, she is held like a teddy bear in S/O's arms, making her slightly annoyed.
(G11) "Loud..."
(S/O) "How can you sleep through that screaming and bloodshed?!"
(G11) "...It's not real."
(S/O) "B-BUT IT LOOKS SO REAL!"
(G11) "...Hm...I'm going back to sleep..."
She drools on their arms while S/O is never ever letting go of G11, for less romantic reasons this time around.
Not that she minded entirely, since it was comfortable.
Until S/O screamed and shook her awake, making her eyes groggily open before shutting again.
HK416 obliges S/O in watching horror movies.
After all, nothing like having the best T-Doll protect them, even from something as mundane as a film.
She only gets scared, because S/O screamed directly next to her.
(HK416) "GAH! God damn-why are you so loud?!"
(S/O) "S-Sorry, it just scared me!"
She rolls her eyes when she feels S/O get closer to her. A slight blush came to her cheeks as she muttered something under her breath.
(HK416) "If you were going to piss yourself, why are we doing this?"
(S/O) "I...I thought I could look braver if I could watch this with you here..."
(HK416) "Heh, some job you're doing."
She's going to lord it over her S/O that she wasn't scared once from the movie.
Until the final jumpscare made her recoil into S/O's arms, turning the tables.
#girls' frontline imagines#girls' frontline headcanons#girls' frontline x reader#kalina x reader#helianthus x reader#g36 x reader#ak 15 x reader#rpk 16 x reader#architect gfl x reader#scarecrow gfl x reader#m16a1 x reader#g11 x reader#hk416 x reader#kalina gfl#helianthus gfl#g36 gfl#ak 15 gfl#rpk 16 gfl#architect gfl#scarecrow gfl#m16a1 gfl#g11 gfl#hk416 gfl
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FHJY Spoilers || my live thoughts as I watch episode 3
Had a rough week so far, I am looking forward to this episode ♡
HIIIIII INTREPID HEROES
NAT 20
please bring ayda back this episode (begging) (I know it won't happen. but I'm desperate)
ZELDA AND GORGUG BREAK UP CONFIRMED.....
I am experiencing so much gender envy from literally everyone at the table.
The art team really pulled out all the stops for this season. The dome backdrop is so good
THIRTY INVESTIGATION?!!!??!
"Of course you and Adaine, of course, are... Nerds."
"Not ideal for the bad kids" oh no.
Lone Wolf Bloodrush player. That's oc material fr
"I like getting friends cast on me so I willingly fail" fig becomes more and more relatable every episode
"IT'S 10 AND I GIVE YOU THE HELP ACTION"
LYDIA!!!!!! 🔥🔥🔥🔥
LYDIA MADE THEM LUNCH 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
THE EMO SONG 😭😭😭
It just says "Hey Adaine" on the inside 😭😭
Cloaca.....
how many binders do the Thistlesprings have
"Can I Run From You?"
Just Breathe
CHLOE SHORT FOR CLOACA
I love the casual conversation they have
TWO GLASSES OF MILK
"I'll walk you to Bard class" fig probably won't be staying 😭
NEW LUNCH LAD!!!!!
I hope Fig's luck issue gets resolved soon 😭
MAZEY IS SO PRETTY
Grix...??
THE PARROTS.....
omg mazey x fabian?!!?!?!????!?!?!!?!
A SECRET CLOACA WITH A GUN??
Jawbone is so filled with dad lore
Kristen class president is something I need
21 passive investigation is insane
"What are you, like 4 different dogs?"
Passive Aggressive Kristen is so good.
Ghost steaks 🔥
FABIAN FLIRTING
"You're looking at a party boy" oh fabian....
I think Kristen working to be class president will convince her to. Go to school and work on getting better at it
Gilear 😢 I miss my pathetic wet cat of a man
fig writer's block so relatable
Stressed Riz
WANDA CHILDA
HEYYYYYY GIRLIE
I miss Ayda
Porter is kinda.... ♡
Why is everyone so attractive why must I be attracted to all the adults. im supposed to have a type
"I'm going into a worry, yeah"
Fig taking Fabian to the wizard class instead of bard class is so real
TERPSICHORE SKULLCLEAVER!!!!!! she looks like she bakes incredible cookies. I can't dance but I want to be in her class
THIRTY-ONE????????? PERFORMANCE
Dance bard class is so cool
From Jock to Arsty kid, I love Fabian's character development so much
"I'm going to do a lot less partying" a full lie from Fabian
I need more Riz and Jawbone one on ones
KRISTEN CHILLIS APPLEBEES 😭😭😭😭
oh no the Applebees fam are here oh no...
Ripped Kristen approaching her parents.....
oh no. oh no. oh no.
Not good what is going on with Cassandra
MAKE HER OWN PEOPLE TO TALK TO?!!!??!???!??!?? WHAT???????? WHAT WHAT WHAT????
ALLY IS SO CASUAL WITH NAT 20S 😭
HE'S A LITTLE PALADIN....
BYE GIRLIE
RIZ HAS A BACKUP TIE
why is sorcery so expensive
SHE'S NOT GOING TO TELL JAWBONE 😭
oh god Wanda Childa....
"what smell would be enticing to emo kids" 😭😭😭
"Did you just come from a room full of cigarettes and peach schnapps" "you mean breakfast?"
I wanda'd in
NOT ALL WHO WANDA ARE LOST
SITTING OUTSIDE AND LISTENING TO BARD CLASS
watching Kristen deal with school and stuff and deal with Cassandra makes me slightly uncomfortable. not in a bad way but in a way that I relate to it a bit too much and it's a bit too real. i too had extreme trouble with school and I also have issues with pushing important people away when trying to focus on myself and it ruins a lot of my relations. I relate to Kristen too much in the worst ways and that hits closer to home than I like. I love Kristen but man. Too close
"Things can be bad, and things can be good, but they all can be true."
I worry about Kristen going to Cassandra's realm. I am going into a worry. I have bad feeling.
the sound design is so good
GENTLE SOBBING.... OH NO. OH NO.
"I can't rely on you." OUCH.
she already found somebody????
KALINA!?!?!?! !!??!?!?!!!???!??!!??!!???!!???!?? HUHHHHH?!!??!!
IT'S LEAVING IT OFF WITH THAT?????? WHAT THE FUCK???????? WHAT THE FUCK???????????????????????? WHAT?????
#fantasy high junior year spoilers#fhjy spoilers#fantasy high spoilers#d20#dimension 20#fantasy high#d20 fantasy high#dimension 20 fantasy high#fantasy high junior year#fig faeth#fabian seacaster#riz gukgak#kristen applebees#adaine o'shaughnessey#adaine abernant
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Pls share your abernant headcanons! I am unfortunately constantly thinking about them!
hii hello me too anon me too… this is another sort of appearance headcanon, but i think that adaine and aelwyn mirror and oppose each other in their appearances from freshman year to junior year in a way that’s beautiful and lovely but also tragic and heartbreaking..
freshman year:
aelwyn is thin, always dresses up, perfectly straight platinum blond hair down to her mid back and perfect makeup both to accentuate her appearance and also cover up any possible flaws. this is important both in an “abernant family” sense and also because of the work she’s doing for kalvaxus/kalina/the nightmare king - her persona needs to be irreproachable.
adaine, on the other hand, is chubby and freckly and covered in acne, her short dirty blond hair has unbecoming (to her family, anyway) streaks of brown in it, she has her big circle glasses and her ill-fitting hudol uniform. she’s awkward and nervous and childishly mean where aelwyn is polished and beautiful and wickedly cruel, at least until the house party fight and her arrest, when we see her frazzled (and see her roots coming in!)
sophomore year:
adaine is coming into her own! she has her own clothes, she has boggy, she wears her (still smudgy) glasses with more confidence. her hair is a bit longer, it curls a bit at the ends the way aelwyn’s never did. her acne is not so much clearing up as solidifying (i have a specific thing with adaine’s acne scars turning into a four-pointed star on her forehead at the end of fhfy lmk if you want to see it and i’ll doodle it!). she’s altogether more confident and more righteous and by the end of it she has a SWORD.
aelwyn, meanwhile, has been non-stop crawling in an orb for the better part of a year (<- ask me about this too i have Thoughts.). she has been unable to take care of herself. her hair is loooong, down to her waist and matted to hell. it’s only about 3/4ths blonde at this point as her roots grow out more and more. she’s exhausted, she’s unfocused, she’s unwell, she’s unhealthily thin from months of malnourishment. and even when that version of her is replaced, the physical effects of the orb still remain. i think while in the nightmare forest things get caught in her hair all the time and she just lets it - she’s completely given up on taking care of herself or maintaining her appearance at all.
and junior year:
aelwyn cuts her hair! goodbye, blonde. now she’s got brown or black hair and her brown eyes :) she still has permanent damage from sophomore year (i’m so serious ask me about this) but she’s healing as much as she can and learning to live around what injuries won’t heal. she’s stopped using as much makeup, so her acne actually shows! & to adaine, the mean curve of her mouth doesn’t seem cruel so much as affectionate, now. as she’s healing she gains weight, for now just up to where she was in freshman year but more in the future :)
adaine’s hair is longer than ever, at just past her shoulder blades, and as she settles into the role of oracle, it whitens more and more. her eyes get bluer and lighter, too, and her forehead acne scars and fades and fully appears as that four pointed star, glowing faintly whenever she uses divination magic. in contrast to aelwyn, she’s gotten taller and a bit thinner as the last of her baby fat fades.
so in the end we have an junior year adaine that looks similar to freshman year aelwyn, and a junior year aelwyn that’s similar to freshman year adaine. explodes into a million pieces
#.txt#.ask#SORRY THIS GOT SO LONG I TRULY DIDNT MEAN IT TO I JUST STARTED TALKINF#but yeah i think about them so much aelwyn avernant the woman that you are. ultimate failure of an older sister m#i just think it’s so tragic that they sort of become each other by the end of it. but it’s good and beautiful that they do#anyway thank you for asking hehe :3#fhjy#fh#fantasy high#d20 fhjy#d20 fantasy high#aelwyn abernant#adaine abernant#adaine o'shaughnessey
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I am 1000% invested in everything going on with Kristen Applebees and I think she might be my favorite character in a cast made up of favorite characters.
Am I concerned about Cassandra and her continued existence in the face of Kristen's distance? Yes. Is Kalina being back both awesome and a bit concerning? Also yes. Do I wanna see her more with Bucky ABSOLUTELY. There is just...SO much possibility and interesting stuff going on with Kristen. Chaos is no longer cute, and it's gonna be great to watch everything unfold.
Also Adine's story is gonna be great to watch too, because...money having to deal with the expenses of life. God. She's so relatable.
Man am I SO glad I speedran Sophomore Year to the best of my ability.
#fantasy high junior year#fantasy high#dimension twenty#d20 spoilers#fhjy spoilers#dimension 20 fantasy high
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Jr Year ep4
This is me live blogging bc I need to get thoughts out also would love fandom friends full spoilers bellow the cut just so no one accidentally reads anything they don’t want to this will be long
I have wanted most if not all of Zac's and Murph's shirts this season
I still have issues with the multiclass system but also no school thing has made the most sense in universe
I believe you and that's why I'm not saying anything is SUCH a trouble friend mood
"what's the drinking age?" "you have murdered SO many people"
BRENANS FACE WHEN KALINA SAYS I'M NOT BAD ANYMORE OH LORDS
the whole Kalina/Cassandra/Kristen scene is so nerve wrecking and interesting and once again I can talk so much about this topic and I know I have critized Kristen's approach but that's bc honestly I do have issue w it despite understanding it but it does make for an interesting arc and with this conversation it does seem like she believes in this domain of faith on the unknown. I will at some point talk more about from the point of someone who also left a culty religious thing but was still expected to perform similarly once out of it but my thoughts are still not the most organized
that being said I do not trust kalina and i do love cassandra
when you're in the dark I'm there holding your hand why am i crying
not kvx still being a thing lmao so Brennan
oh I just love how complicated but absolutely Bill Seacaster is the whole trust thing, the money going to the nemesees, there being a whole department, honestly that's a department I'd work for it's basically spy and gossip stuff
but also poor Fabian having to go through all this head ache stuff alone
watch Caperslolly Cattlekrush not be a direct nemesis but someone from her party be yes Fabian get that service!
I too keep thinking it is rat ccrushers no t grinders and will absolutely get it wrong
the gorthlax art is PERFECT
my school nurse did not have sweat pants but ok murph(i also absolutely am not from the us idk why i keep pointing out diferences)
they each will have a foil in my head so why just one owlbear contender? also is riz in the bloodrush team?
grinding for xp is so much weirder and terrible imo in this context also should be less effective bc like lbr experience is important like thinking on your feet etc like yes they are probably equal level and Brenan will play them well but they should absolutely not be as good as the bad kids at actual adventuring
I love how they all are so agro tho bc I get it and love the energy and I would absolutely be that mad
YES SOMEONE CALLED OUT THE HIPOCRISY
xp isn't bad if you at least still DO INTERESTING STUFF TO GET IT
if brenan makes them like grinding i will become as agro as the bad kids so far lol
gorthlax gave great advice, that being said i do hope they get a lil bit petty and end annoying grinders
nooo Gorgug (cries) I really want him to do well
listen I am so emo about gorgu's storyline like it's just no thoughts just feels and all of them
listen i don't do character builds but it does not sound to me like artificer and barbarian are THAT ill fitted, like yes the require different focus levels and types but they are also USED in different moments, nothing is stopping Gorgug from using his down time to come up with gadgets that work WITH his strenght and dex and rage and then use reckless abandon in battles. I think even th solar lasso is very much an example of that because it uses his strenghts, he's realing it in with atheltics checks iirc or how his shoes have jump like yes absolutely a challenge and not the most obvious but people are acting like it's impossible when it absolutely isn't
we love Corsica Jones
Riz helping Kristen <3
Brenan is absolutely having so much fun with Ayada's messages
Listen Fig does not need to go to warlock classes, no one in the school knows she is a warlock just do bard and barbarian and help your friend
also i get that procrastination girl
Please I want Fig and Gorgug to work on a song together and for us to get that scene so bad
Aelwynn is a whole entire mood
well that answers me: riz is not on bloodrush
I KNEW BRENNAN MADE THEM STUPID RATS TOO GOOD I HATE IT BUT I LOVE IT
wouldn't detect magic tell riz what enhancements she has? cause otherwise it's nnot THAT useful for spies (which is reason #1 the gadget exists)
oh brennan REALLY made people we will all hate
Yes Bucky I adore him
someone please go home with Fabian
ohhh Brennan put extra stakes at Fig just quitting/failling auegfort since she technically doesn't need it
oh warlock classes are night classes, kinda love that for Fig and also good for her being good at it
also looove the talk about exchanges and that
FIg could make an album out of pressure and expextations that woul be rad as hell
RAGH we love him
LISTEN Ragh should be like party guy, he was absolutely popular and is older and it takes stuff away from the bad kids to do
oh Fabian goes into it immediately we stan
Listen Ally is MASTER of weird ass energies and I love them for it
they truly are such dorks and somehow cool at the same time
I cannot tell if they don't know milkyriver's name or if they are benedict cumberbunching it and I love that
literally everything kalina says is so threatening
also the bad kids should count as followers of cassandra like they are not clerics sure but they ablsolutely belive in her... do only clerics/paladins count?
LISTEN BRENNAN WE DON'T NEED MORE PROBLEMS
oh the shard and red thing that was in one of the arts
oh I REALLY thought they were gonna split party this
I do hope the party still goes well
#fantasy high#dimension 20#fhjy#adaine o'shaughnessey#fabian aramais seacaster#fig faeth#gorgug thistlespring#kristen applebees#riz gukgak
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Re: Porter vs Jace suspicious vibes -- I think I'm at the point in the season where I'm doubting EVERYTHING. Like, Gorgug only heard Jace, he didn't see anything, didn't do any checks/etc about the encounter. I think I'm just too deep into the "is the a red herring?" and "is this just the Rat Grinders (or someone else) flat out manipulating things" paranoia to take that one encounter at face value. If it's really Jace then I can't wait to learn more, but I just feel like he's too much of a background, blank slate for it to have been him all along. So glad I'm not at the table because I am NOT smart enough to figure these mysteries out
See I've been thinking about this and like I DONT know but also I feel like there's something bigger than the ratgrinders at work here?? Idk why but like they CANNOT be orchestrating all this- something real bad is happening at the school and I think it goes beyond aguefort just leaving the stove on. And like what was Jace talking about with Kalina that time. What's going on with the man like why is he vice principal in the first place tbh???? The chill sorcery teacher???? I also just think it'd be hysterical if it's been Jace the whole time while Fig was running after Porter. Just for a laugh
And yeah same I'd be at that table just no thoughts head empty this is too difficult
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🚨SPOILERS FOR FANTASY HIGH JUNIOR YEAR EPISODE 5!!!🚨
Dimension20 "Fantasy High Junior Year"
Episode 5 "Mall Madness"
Timestamp: 1:46:04
Video Length: 4min. & 59sec.
Kristen tries to reach out to Cassandra
Brennan: "Yeah, you can reach out and talk to Cassandra."
Ally: "I don't wanna say anything. Can I just listen?"
Brennan: "You listen."
Ally: "Can I just open up the channel of communication and-"
Brennan: "Listen-"
NOT BRENNAN ADJUSTING HIMSELF IN HIS SEAT!!! 😭😭😭✋✋✋ THAT'S WHEN YOU KNOW IT'S GONNA GET BAD!!! 😭😭✋✋
BRENNAN'S "I'M EVIL" SIT!!! 😭✋
The Amazing Caption Team: "(Brennan exhales ominously)"
MYSTERY VOICE?!: "She is at my side once more.
Ally: "So she is the death?"
Zac: "Is that Cassandra?"
Ally: "That's the- That's the Nightmare King talking about Kalina?"
Siobhan: "No"
Ally: "No?"
Emily: "Cassandra?"
Ally: "Did Cassandra turn back into the Nightmare King and someone is by her side once more?"
Siobhan: "Is Cassandra a lesser god serving a more powerful god?"
MYSTERY VOICE?!: "Do you wish for divinity?"
Kristen: "To serve, or to be, myself?"
I loved Ally's answer there! I wanna dissect that line SO BADLY but I'm too dumb to do that! 😂🤣💀 I don't know how I would! 💀✋
MYSTERY VOICE?!: "You have opened yourself to listen. Do you wish to listen?"
Kristen: "Yes"
MYSTERY VOICE?!: "Good. I shall give you a master you deserve."
Brennan: "Red, crackling light. And a slimy, rotting set of block letters that says "Yes!" with an exclamation mark is shunted out of the portal. (squelches)"
1. I love Zac's reaction! That's LITERALLY ME! 😭✋
2. Brennan's "Squelch" sound was too good! 😭✋
Fig: "We've got to clear this before the party."
Kristen casts banishment on the "YES!" 😭✋
Kristen: "Thank you, kind master. I will cherish it. Who do I serve? Who am I speaking to?"
Lou: *laughs* "Serve?" *Covers his face* 😂😂
MYSTERY VOICE?!: "I am coming for you."
Lou's reaction! 😭😭 LITERALLY ME! 😭✋ It's just so funny that Lou is making that face when that voice is talking to Kristen! Not Fabian! 😂🤣💀😭✋
MYSTERY VOICE?!: "And when I find you, I will break you in a way that none who loved you will recognize the ruin I have wrought."
BRO! THAT LINE!! YIKES!! SHIVERS!! 😭😭✋✋
MYSTERY VOICE?!: "Lean your soul in closer, that I might give you more than words." 😭✋
Ally cuts this off! 😭✋
HOW DOES BRENNAN LAUGH AFTER THAT FR THOUGH!?!?!?!? 😭😭😭✋✋✋
Kristen gets some images of a shattered mall, of fractions of these red glass stars collecting shards of blue astral mall, the corpses of dead wizards floating in astral space, strudel streaming out of a portal endlessly in sort of- oblivion.
Ally makes a Religion check and gets a 19!
Brennan: "Looking at all of this here, you do not feel the presence of another divinity, but yet something divine has happened. I think what you know is that there is some rage working within Cassandra that was prompted by those stars, that was prompted by those shattering things. So, I think all of your questions come back to them. Like- That's what started this. Obviously, it began within Cassandra's chest, though, and you keep coming back to that term, 'I thought you were dead', you hear 'I thought you were dead,' and you look down and see this dead- or- you banished it, but you see the slime left by the dead, rotting god that you summoned in your Freshman Year, and you suddenly remember that the Wizard Synod, the Synod of Spire, this mall, was in the Astral Realm."
Zac: "When Cassandra was saying, 'I thought you were dead,' would she be talking about 'Yes!', or is that something else?"
Emily: "I think so"
Ally: "She knew very much about 'Yes!'"
Murph: "That's why she, that's the example of-"
Emily says that the rotting "Yes!" means that Kristen's god turned into toxic positivity!! 😂🤣💀
Ally just laughs! 😂🤣💀
Ally: "I think so. Oh no...okay, okay..."
The Bad Kids wanna go find Ragh to talk to him about this maybe. 🥲
Brennan: "As you say that, I don't think it would be intuitive that it's "Yes!", because "Yes!" slid out like a dead, flat joke."
Ally: "Okay."
Brennan: "You think whatever that voice was slid 'Yes!' out to you and said, 'I'll give you a master you deserve.' and it was like a- you know what I mean? It's like- It's like a humiliation. It's like 'Here's your god.'"
Ally: "So when she said, 'I thought you were dead', it wasn't to 'Yes!'"
Brennan: "It wasn't to 'Yes!', you don't think it was."
#dimension 20#dimension20#blog#fantasy high#fantasy high junior year#mall madness#fantasy high mall madness#fantasy high junior year episode 5#fantasy high scene#fantasy high junior year scene#dimension20 scene#queue#mystery voice#scary mystery voice#brennan lee mulligan#kristen#kristen applebees#ally beardsley#cassandra#zac oyama#emily axford#lou wilson#siobhan thompson#brian murphy#murph#the bad kids#the intrepid heroes#bad kids#intrepid heroes
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My Top 5 Favorite Seasons of Dimension 20
Before I start, these are all great and they could alternate depending on my mood, especially the top three. I'm also watching Unsleeping City for the first time right now (im sorry. i know it's great, i just never got around to watching it because i was rewatching Fantasy High for the 10th time) so that's why it's not on the list.
Also, there is a poll at the end to see what everyone's favorite is out of these 5 choices and whichever wins I'm going to rewatch.
5. Misfits and Magic. My personal favorite of the shorter seasons (6-8 episodes). I loved all the cast members, they were all amazing but it just felt very rushed for me? Like, throw in a fifth episode for me just for the sake of pacing. The Tri-Wizard Tournament thing came out of nowhere and I think the pacing would've worked if they lead with the fact the Magical Misfits had to prove themselves to stay (and they had to do it too). I know the Headmistress was trying to blindsight them but anyone else could've mentioned it. Other than that, this was amazing. I love this and am trying to get my mom to watch it with me because she loves the books that shall not be named
4. Fantasy High Season One. It was really good and I love all of the Bad Kids so much it's not even funny. Bill Seacaster and Jawbone are my favorite NPCs in any TTRPG show ever and I love Fabian, Riz and Fig so much My main thing was the fight scenes. Fight scenes every other episode was a lot for me, someone who hates combat in my actual games of TTRPGS. I'm glad Brennan paced it so fight scenes were only every couple of episodes afterward, it made them feel more heavy and exciting that way.
3. The Seven. This season feels so underrated for some reason? No one ever talks about it, I never see fanart for it like I see the others on this list. All six Heroic Highschoolers did such a great job bringing their characters and teen struggles to life, it made me feel every single emotion at once. Two problems with this season though: One, no one played Zelda which I'm willing to forgive since they were playing it safe with covid regulations. Number two though is how much Sam Nightingale hogged screen time. Don't get me wrong, I love Sephie so much and she really made this season great, but I can't help but feel like she just got more attention that could've gone to other members of the Seven. Maybe it's the fact she got more one on one scenes since she was always talking to Zelda who was played by Brennan? At times it just felt like the Sam show and not an adventure about The Seven. But everyone go rewatch this though. I think I'm the only person who's rewatched it since it came out and I've rewatched it at least six times.
2. A Court of Fey and Flowers. Literally a perfect season. It has my personal favorite cast, amazing characters, and one of the best blends of humor and emotions a season of Dimension 20 could have. My only trouble is that parts of it don't have the rewatchability the other seasons have with all the secrets and rumors. I do still cry at Hob's confession though, even after the fourth time.
1. Fantasy High: Sophomore Year. I think this is one of, if not the best, seasons they have ever done. You get so much world-building for Spyre compared to other campaigns, you already know the characters so you spend more time fleshing them out and meeting new amazing side characters, like Ayda and Kalina, or fleshing out ones we already know, like Sandra-Lynn and Cathilda. I still openly sob every single one of the Bad Kid's troubles and I love them so much. Give me a season of the Bad Kids and The Seven, Brennan!
So, now that we're done, which is the best season out of these? Are there other The Seven lovers out there? IDK, VOTE!
#the seven dimension 20#dimension 20#dimension20#dimension 20 fantasy high#d20 fantasy high#fantasy high#d20 fhsy#d20#the seven maidens#d20 the seven#the seven d20#d20 acofaf#acofaf#a court of fey and flowers#misfits and magic#evan kelmp#fig faeth#fabian seacaster#sam nightingale#kp hob#captain kp hob#delloso de la rue#sam black#whitney jammer#chirp featherfowl#lady chirp featherfowl#gorgug thistlespring#lord squak airavis#ostentatia wallace#danielle barkstock
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Dreams Preview - D20 Gift Exchange
A quick little preview of the first scene of my D20 gift exchange fic! The full thing (which is getting some edits and an honest-to-god beta reading) will be posted (and who it is for revealed) sometime between the 24th and the 31st but I'm an impatient giver so it's almost certainly going to be the 24th.
This is, among other things, a full Fantasy High class swap AU. I am genuinely really curious for everyone's guesses on what everyone will be even though I am giving absolutely 0 information on anyone other than Riz in this preview. :D
Half of Riz Gukgak's world had been ripped away out of nowhere. Dad had been busy, always, all of Riz's life. His busy was busy in a different way than Mom's was, where she might be out late and working around the clock to prove herself but was a phone call away in an emergency. Dad might be gone for weeks or months at a time between when he could come home. Still, he always thought his father was invincible. That he'd be able to defeat anyone who tried to harm him, and return to sweep Riz up into a hug afterwards, however long that might be.
Until they'd gotten word that he would not be home, would not be hugging them, and that it was just Riz and his Mom against the world now.
It left a frozen hole in Riz's chest, that the invincibility had turned out to not be true. That Solace wasn't even willing to acknowledge publicly that his dad had worked for them was even worse, like being spat on while bleeding.
His mom hadn't been able to take much time from work, and with no body there wasn't much of a funeral either. Today, there wasn't even Penny to babysit; he didn't really NEED her there, of course, but it was lonely with her absent and his mom busy.
He'd busied himself with reading some of his favorite detective stories, well-worn books in a series his dad had introduced him to.
"Hey, kid." A voice came, from just behind him. He whirled around, and standing there was a Tabaxi woman, with black fur and the facial features of a housecat.
"Aaahh! Intruder!" He yelled, even though he knew nobody ever checked on their neighbors in the Strongtower Luxury Apartments they lived in, even as he went for where he knew the gun safe was.
"Hey, no, calm down kid. I'm not here to hurt you. I'm not even really here at all, exactly. Just try to touch me?" The woman said, leaning down and offering her hand out to him. He reached out to take it and.. went right through, waving his hand back and forth through hers. He stared up at her, eyes wide.
"Are you an illusion?" He thought he knew what to do about wizards, but he was also only ten.
"Not exactly. I'm. Hmm, how to describe it? Let's just say I'm a servant of a god. Think of me as a messenger, or an angel, I guess. A god that your father worked for, and he asked for me to check in on you. Said you hadn't been sleeping much, that you weren't taking his death very well. He was worried. My name's Kalina." She said, watching him, her tail flicking behind her.
But Riz squinted at her, and he couldn't help but accuse. "My dad didn't work for a god. He worked for Solace. I never heard him talk about any gods."
Kalina nodded. "Yes, that's what he had to say, and he did work for Solace. He just also worked for the Sleeping God. She's unfairly not very well regarded by most people, so he had to keep that part quiet. I suggest you do, too. But is there anything you want me to pass on to him? Or, and this is just a suggestion, but you could start sleeping again and then you'd at least be able to see him in dreams. Those are my god's domain - and his god's, too, of course."
Riz squinted, trying to read if she was lying like the cool detectives in his stories could do, but a promise like that was something he just could not pass on. "…Can I really see him in dreams?"
"Of course, kid. You could even learn some control of it, to see him more often, if you really wanted to." Kalina promised. "Just go to bed tonight and take a full night's sleep, for his sake and yours."
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week 4
start concepting creature designs with previous critique in mind.
Rember i am going to use (sucessful) properties as inspiration to create a new and orignal design thats intersting.
with the use of refrences found on google (NON AI) i practiced more anatomy and this time some flat rendering to practice texturing like meat, mucles, feathers and fur
a Utah raptor, a not Golden retriever (horse + lemur and skinned animal insp), a not Border collie (pterosaur + fetus/raw chicken insp)
wanted to still give the Utah raptor a shot because they are incredible animals and i would love to make one with feathery coat and all but i suppose I'll do that in my free time.
for the not a bordercollie(black and white "dog") I took inspiration from creepy pastas like suggested, i looked to classics like "The Rake" and smiledog.jpg (the husky version) which scared me to death as a kid. Though those were more in the background, main influences came from "The Thing"(1982). i wante dit to be off but not so much to emidiatly tell its wrong, just a slight feeling of unease. i dislocated the neck and set it far too high up, extended the corners of its mouth too far back, gave it hand like paws and made it skinny. though i kept the body pretty dog like i felt like it was too clearly off especially the sharp eyes though collies often have very piercing light eyes.
after that i expanded on the idea with the golden retriever as i wanted a more family friendly looking dog, one you wouldnt expect to be a danger but again something being clearly off while still inviting. same inspirations of The Thing and smile dog.jpg (red version this time) and also "Annihilation"(2018) this time. The people yearn for body horror(recent spike in attention on franchises like "The thing" and "Fear and Hunger" body horror : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dRIkWHo1SJY a recent 50 minute video with 3.5 million views on fear and hunger)
i also thought about doing a nod to annalog horror but felt that that specific type of eyes would defeat my original intent of creating a whole new intersting creature not seen before. the eyes are over done as they are found in many analog projects such as "local 68", "The Walten files", "The Mandela Catalog" and "Smile tapes", its a cute nod but not fit in this context.
i chose a horse/canid mix skull to poke out from under the dogs skin as i felt it would be spooky. it looks cool but after finsing the concept i realized that horse, ungulate and dog/predatory mamal skulls are also a common trope in horror, think of Annihalation again and "The Ritual" as well as others that i cant recall at the moment. as well as the welsh tradition of Mari Lwyd
images of all of the mentioned properies abov e in that order: (these are still inspirations and refrences)
these are far from the only refrences used
putting that aside, i had given a second stage to the retriever instead of just having the dog stand up. though i still liked that idea, i decided to also make a second stage for the collie with the new information i had gathered from making the retriever. i wanted the new form to be stranger more thing like and less mamalian, just giving a bird tounge to a horse head didnt do the job. i took inspiration from pterasaurs as my friend had said that they thought they were so unsetteling and weird while watching "Prehistoric Planet". thier skulls are weird and almost alien and thier arms have odd proportions. i also took inspiration from the beasts from The Quiet Place again as they also have these odd body plans. i gave it the look of raw chicken or a fetus and eyes like those of a dead cow just to bump up the weird factor.
when show casing these the client suggested trying some other deisgns.
i was planning on refining the creature, he didnt really state what kind of "different stuff" he was looking for but kalina wanted to give designing a creature a shot so i would have time to refine these designs into one next week. Kalina is currently working on a design that is like the video that diego showed and also a design based on dutch mythology? We are already four weeks in, other groups had started development and we would need a lot more time to make a detailed sculpt and animate.
aditional cartoony dragon like creatures just to practice creature design, based on the descriptions of a snellygaster, an american cryptid (I made in the second week to fit the magic show theme from Kalina but it fits best here)
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FHJY Spoilers || my live thoughts as I watch episode 10
Happy mid season episode! I am saddened by the fact that I work on Wednesdays because I will be late to watch fhjy until the forseeable future. If anyone cares though I plan on buying the adya statuette next week if my finances allow for it :3 also I am so tired rn but I NEED to watch fhjy
Do you guys think ayda will appear in this episode after her statuette was released last week? (Praying)
tttaking over teenage rebellion!
Lucy Frostblade... You were just a girl. You didn't deserve everything that happened to you
"We're feeling bad. But we're feeling... Hopefully positive."
stress isn't always the bed guy
Aelwyn!
big old burned down house
Cottoncandy Bitchfuck
"I'm.... Bored. That's not true. I'm not bored at all. I'm just tired."
Hindesight is 50/50
"Oh I love this. Tell me all about it."
Siobhan is loving Aelwyn rn
"I do sometimes believe in you"
"So Sentimental"
Aelwyn and Adaine are so important to me their sibling relationship is everything
AELWYN AND ADAINE NOT BEING USED TO NICENESS
"Oh, my sweet little boy is sick!"
"just don't tell fab— don't tell anyone my apartment looks like this"
The Gukgak
I'm the Gukgak guy!
"Oh, Riz, you have to sleep, Kiddo." "I can't, mom, I don't have time." Oh Riz....
Framed?
Riz is so exhausted
It's been an hour and a half and his mom has chips and a drink 😭😭
"Mom, you have to be so careful."
"Keep my name out of your mouth." FIG 😭😭
"it's all good, mom"
yulenear
"Fig has like 3 majors now" "maybe 4, i might take a level of wizard."
"Kristen Applebees, believe it or not." "... huh." HWHHWKWNEB
"You both keep my name out of your mouth."
"It's been our month!"
Lola Embers recommended Gorgug's place??
"Mom I'm going to go to Loam farm."
*shrug* "mom." *shrug*
"We're having a rough one." "GOT 'EM."
"I'll do it." Fig cleric teacher?!?!
TAMAGOTCHI. MaryAnn my beloves
The puppet master!
"Ha Ha! Darling Girl!"
Gilear is king for the day
"My mom called you?"
"I don't need a ride to school anymore"
"I believe she's wanted here."
BUSINESS CLASS FOR CLOACA
"Can I say hi??"
NOOOOOOO NOOO SHE HUNG UP BEFORE FABIAN COULD ANSWER
That's so devastating
Coffee all over the DM screen
Yeah they haven't addressed the fact that fig is cursed
Pussy out, tits away
Theres so much going on
ohhh they might be sacrificing the rats
"I'm wearing a sports bra and a G-string, and I want to be closer with all of you."
Fabian with Mazey is so painful. He's so flustered and awkward I love him
MAZEY TRUSTS FABIAN
"I'm here, for you."
"Kristen was in a mood."
NOO DON'T KILL MAZEY SAVE HER FABIAN
Fried rice
SHE LEANS IN TO MAKE OUT
THIS IS SO EMBARRASSIJG
"Wait, they don't like us??"
"When you think about me, why do you always bring up the ball?"
SHE WANTS TO MAKE SURE HE'S OKAY BECAUSE HE'S ALOne
oh Fabian...,...........
"The legend continues."
"I was going to get a tattoo, actually."
"Even if you weren't maximum legend, I would still wanna hang out with you." MAZEEYYYYY 😭😭😭😭
BOGGY
Absence of divinity???
THE GOD'S DOMAIN CHANGED OVER TIME????
RUVINA'S SIBLING??
The gift is only mentioned in old texts??
"Well I guess I'll go to work."
Basrar is dead
"Literally your circus, literally your monkeys."
Tips are bad
RODEO MODE
THE MIDDLE SCHOOL FOR A SPEECH???
NOOO NAT ONE
Check the soil kids
Lydia mention 🔥🔥🔥
Kristen holds so much hostility for Kalina 😭😭
Oh Lydia...
AV club mention
THIRTY ROLL 🔥🔥🔥🔥
The powerhouse of the cell
Aggression and protectiveness
7 becomes a 21?!?!!
?!?!?!?!?! SOMETHING COMING OUT OF HER CHEST???
22 Arcana, 25 religion
Elemental alignment???
Fiendish things going on
Yellow gold
Kinda like the pride of armor and lemon yogurt
PISS CURSE????
Ratgrinders sticker
"I don't get angry, I think I get sad sometimes" me too buddy, me too
Sometimes a spell comes out and obliterates people
Comedy of errors
Autopilot
Bobby Dawn and Pam Dawn
Bobby Dawn coming to Aguefort sounds like a bad thing
"I'll never let you do that."
"Yours only came back once." *middle finger* Kristen Applebees you will always be famous
A+ in paladin classes!
"Sorry! Get away from me"
Reasons he won't divulge???
A+ in all classes!!!
THREE PARAGRAPH ESSAY? NOOO ABOUT SADNESS AND DISAPPOINTMENT NOOOOO
FIG NAT 20 FOR THE INSIGHT 😭
Zara is gorgeous
The days of Goldenhoard is over 😭😭
"MY GOD IS KRISTEN????"
Oh my god I almost prophesied this when I said Kristen would become a cleric/warlock of Fig.... instead Fig is the warlock/paladin of Kristen 😭😭😭
I'm the closest thing to a prophet holy shit
New god, agreement, todo list
Complicated Women: Lucy Frostblade 😭😭
NAT 20 DECEPTION FOR WANDA CHILDA
Oh my god
"Frick. I'm so sorry." "I'm not." Wanda Childa
GET MY ROCKS OFF TO 😭😭
"I'm off the grid that's why I only have an iPod"
God... Wanda Childa
"Do you want me to get you a phone?"
"I KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE"
"I want to do relationships with Riz."
Medal of Wit
LITTLE METAL BRIEFCASE
You absolutely sweetie
29 performance 🔥🔥
GARTY O'BRIEN MENTION 🔥🔥🔥🔥
Naked Kristen. Again.
Oh god Fabian is at 4 at his second roll
"Breaker Breaker, this is Fabian Seacaster, looking for his papa, Bill Seacaster, somewhere out there in the nine hells............"
This is so heartbreaking... Fabian...
Oh Fabian...
His papa.....
He probably feels so lonely
Rage token.....
This rage token is making me take a stress token
Everyone single one has been bad
FABIAN TAKING THE BARDIC FROM FIG
Constitution saving throw???
oh no
oh no
oh no
"I shit myself"
I CAN'T BRWATHE
"I've only been eating leftovers"
UNNAMED BARD STUDENT NO
QUINCY NO
DID QUINCY TAKE A RAGE TOKEN?
THAT'S IT????
oh my god
#fhjy spoilers#fantasy high junior year spoilers#fantasy high spoilers#dimension 20#d20#fantasy high#d20 fantasy high#dimension 20 fantasy high#fantasy high junior year
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[07.11.2022 - JUST KNOW THAT IF YOU HIDE, IT DOESN'T GO AWAY]
Why did I leave this little piece (peace?) of mind alone for such a long time.
My horoscope keeps telling me I have trouble with my social life and routine, and that is so true. And it kinda feels like I have absolutely no control over it, I swear, I just keep waking up every day with the same feeling - in a haze, annoyed, isolated from the world. It feels like no one understands what I am going through, because I can't really put it into words and tell anyone about it, but also I don't really understand what everyone around me is going through.
And it hurts so much, to be alone - I depend on having people around me after all, it nurtures me and saves me. I keep reaching out, forcing myself into these social situations and hoping for positive experiences to build up my enthusiasm, and it turns out completely mentally draining and deathly exhausting every time.
Having things to do gives me a lot of energy and purpose - until one day it turns out to be the hardest chore in the world and makes me want to scream from frustration.
I wanna sleep, but I feel restless and anxious, I wanna do stuff to feel productive and alive and I feel so tired I can't think.
I don't know if it's my lifestyle that's at fault, if I really, desperately need therapy because it's something bigger than me, or if it's just a matter of taking more medication because it's my brain chemistry and there's nothing much I can do about that.
I hope my trip makes me happy and is not an anxiety-filled chore. I'm scared shitless that it will and I will have to face it in a foreign country, with a foreign person who doesn't understand.
I really, really want to end this on a good note, how does one do that?
I used to always (and by that I mean, a couple months ago) be able to find the good lessons in the hard situations, now everything is just scary and sad.
I hope I will be able to sleep this one off too.
Kind Regards,
Kalina Pauli
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I think Kalina had a legitimate interest in the Gukgaks in her own evil way. Yes she’s is a liar and a manipulator that’s her whole thing but there’s got to be some level of truth to her saying she was close to Pok. It’s said that Riz met Kalina when he was a little kid. Pok was a spy and a good one, he wasn’t stupid. What kind of spy let’s a casual work friend meet their child? He trusted her for sure. She knew the Gukgaks well she wasn’t just a vague coworker she was important enough in their life that Sklonda noted that she didn’t attend Pok’s funeral. Kalina was evil for sure and a fantastic manipulator but I think Pok was wrong in saying that the Gukgaks were just another means to an end. I mean I think they were but also she seemed to put more effort into being a part of their lives than necessary. I think in the giant network of plagued individuals Kalina considered the Gukgak’s kind of her favorites. I don’t think she was lying when she said that she considered herself Riz’s godmother in some weird twisted way. There’s just something so interesting about the way she interacted with them.
#i am thinking too much about Kalina#she sucks I love her#Kalina d20#d20 kalina#fantasy high sophomore year#riz Gukgak#pok gukgak#d20
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