#i am...not going to tag this beyond that
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the thing is... JK Rowling did write the books. She certainly did write the books, which was the pivotal first step.
However, here is an incomplete list of people who meant more to my experience of reading and enjoying the Harry Potter books than JKR ever did:
My grandmother, who read them because she loved to read and because she wanted to understand what the hell her granddaughter - whom she'd recently moved 3,000 in part to live near - spent 90% of her time talking about; who passed away this past fall.
My other grandmother, who read them for more or less the same reason except without the cross-country move; who passed away in 2014. It was in her honor that I bought the current set of books I own.
The uncle-shaped family friend who always listened to me expound on my latest theories for the next book, and told me his own like an equal in intellectual debate
That one writer on Mugglenet's fanfiction archive who wrote a crack soap opera fic in which Professor McGonagall got pregnant from Crookshanks, and the children were cat-human hybrids whom they called "kiddens." That haunts me to this day.
Honestly, collectively every single person who wrote content, be it recordkeeping, fic, or analysis, for MuggleNet circa 2005-2008. Some people spent their internet-childhoods on Neopets or Club Penguin; I read every single page on MuggleNet.com.
The summer camp counselor who'd read HBP when I hadn't yet, and who responded to my positively tsundere attitude toward spoilers by telling me straight-faced that Harry started dating Luna [not Ginny]. A) The fucking audacity! she lied right to my annoying 10yo face! B) I got to experience the giddiness of finding out what happened twice, once then and again later when I read the book! Thank you, Natalie(?) from Y-Camp!
The two friends with whom I went to the DH midnight release party at my local secondhand bookstore, in closet cosplay. We were all in the first 5 people to get our books, and we promptly started reading them while standing outside the bookstore, in the light coming through the front window. 1 of them was parentally required to go to bed but the other and I stayed up all night reading, until we finished the books sometime mid-morning.
My dad, specifically when he (still) tells the story of having to make a "walk of shame" (his words) back to the bookstore the next afternoon, to ask if they had the broom we'd accidentally left behind.
The tourists from America, England, France and China who were all waiting in line at the Platform 9 3/4 overpriced photo op in King's Cross Station the same time I was, in the summer of 2013, which unironically made me feel more spiritually connected with humanity as a whole than possibly any other experience in my life. Like, this is embarrassing. It's a pure tourist trap. Yet people from LITERALLY all around the world had all made the same journey I had to be there, just because we all loved the same books. and that's...really special.
...you know? So, JKR is doing real harm to the trans community now, and will continue to do more and maybe even worse in the future; and I am so, so sympathetic and angry about that. I have no intention of giving her money or any other support ever again, nor of encouraging anyone else to do so.
But all her present vitriol is only drops in the lake of my warm memories. I don't let them give me a falsely rosy view of her, but nor will I let her poison them. And I encourage others to let themselves find the same balance, if they can.
#hp#i am...not going to tag this beyond that#it'll travel in the right circles if it's meant to#this is me
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The Wizard, The Witch, and The Wild One
#listened to 28 episodes of WBN in like 4 days and am going absolutely insane over these guys#I had so much fun messing with their shape language and colors omg#wbn#wbn pod#worlds beyond number#worlds beyond number fanart#fanart#the wizard the witch and the wild one#wbn www#my art#suvirin kedberiket#ame wbn#suvi wbn#eursulon#eursolon toma#eursulon wbn#I’m so sorry for these tags I have no idea how the fandom tags stuff
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🔍🌙♥️ here’s the tim sticker sheet i designed for the @timdrakeflipzine , with all sorts of alternative media and universe robins and red robins and—
🫶 if you’re interested in the exhaustive list of tim’s included…
young justice 2019 drake (ft. earth 3 ginger tim)
dark knights of steel
unternet tim
bat kid from the animated batman under the red hood movie
regular tim in a fun outfit vaguely based on some older panels :3
lego tim
futures end tim in his batman beyond run
dunce cap red robin from batman unlimited
rebirth robin
new 52 red robin
preboot/2009 red robin
90’s robin
gotham by gaslight
dc bombshells batgirl tim
another set of two silly tims (one w his motorcycle and red robin base suit, the other with his skateboard and camera and superboy shirt)
bald arkhamverse tim
mister sarcastic
superboy mourning/red and black robin costume
young justice animated tim
savior/titans tomorrow tim
gotham knights robin
wayne family adventures
a silly tim as ceo of wayne enterprises :3
if you can believe it, this was after i had to cut down on some other ideas :]
#tim drake#tim drake flip zine#robin#red robin#dc#dc comics#art#as always#timkon#(if you squint)#god am i going to tag all of these. (yes i am)#young justice#dark knights of steel#unternet#bat kid (under the red hood)#batman beyond tim#futures end#batman unlimited#gotham by gaslight#dc bombshells#arkhamverse#mister sarcastic#young justice animated#savior tim drake#titans tomorrow#gotham knights#wayne family adventures#ceo tim drake
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when Ame and Eursulon see Suvi having her breakdown and Ame's response is "Suvi!" and Eursulon's is "Sky!" 10/10 subtle character moment no notes all respect
#caught up on WBN just in time for today's episode drop and THORoughly enjoyed it when i wasn't almost crying right along w/suvi#my GIRL </3#will no one think to investigate further just where that thing came from that caused said crying? (vague bc tag spoilers idk)#because i think that realization (if she can reach it idk if that's within her power or not) would solve some things painful tho it may be#i just want what's best for her and while this was a good step#i am eagerly awaiting if/when she gets to go on a little murderous rampage (after the inevitable further world-shattering that would take)#not sure if her rage is best served cold or hot but it will be magnificent regardless#dreamer listens#worlds beyond number#the witness#wbn spoilers
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people whose posts where they’re bitching and complaining accidentally get into tag searches because tumblrs tag system is stupid and will drag every mention of a tag onto that tag’s search: i forgive you. and i love you. your post made me mad but that is your right to post on your blog. that is your Hater’s Sanctuary and it is just unfortunate that our paths have crossed like this.
people who bitch and complain and then put posts directly in the tag on purpose: i’m going to get you.
#moth flies#if i see another goddamn post in the b*llf*rd tag (notice how i am using asterisks so it doesn’t appear in the tag?)#about people complaining about some ‘you guys’ monolith#not wanting to write about how ‘the man kisses the triangle’ and ‘humanizing him like cowards’#i am going to SCREAM.#because it’s like#i think triangle form is more exciting too! this is true!#i think that measuring his angles can be explored!#i have headcanons on how his anatomy works for kissing and beyond that!#but people who literally just post about people having fun with gijinkas are so. UGH#oh you like the triangle better? you think people are ‘cowards’ for not writing about the triangle exclusively 100% of the time?#should we throw a party? should we tell bella hadid.
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my knight-monk agenda strikes again, but this was less of a 'I read something that made me experience several emotions and a strike of inspiration at once,' and more of a 'wouldn't it be fucked up if the bejeweled skeleton saints came to life and and started. eating people. or something. in revenge. medieval catholic horror, or an older horror of not being buried right. zombies, even. a complete bastardization of holy visuals. zombies.'
it's a far away idea, but I still wanted to play around with font layouts. like, if I DID make it into a full comic: these would be visual vibes, perhaps.
it's also a little bit about the kind of intimacy that these kinds of spaces provide, or in the case of this monk: the heavy trauma of war and the death of your brother, the escape to a secluded monastery, spiritual brotherhood to make up for your dead brother, but your role as a physician keeps pulling you back to this violence you want to escape. physician, heal thyself, only you have a holy calling to serve those in need, so instead: physician, open up your wounds again. saint jude, patron saint of lost causes, give us a fucking hand here, man. amen.
Homosexuality in the Renaissance: Behavior, Identity, and Artistic Expression, James M. Saslow
and this one is about earlier history than the medieval period that this comic is set in, but the monk character is sort of an exploration of earlier themes. a little bit. I like overlapping eras with each other, I've done it before and I'll do it again. this character is an exploration of some other stuff too, but mostly this book was interesting to read
From Monastery to Hospital: Christian Monasticism and the Transformation of Health Care in Late Antiquity, Andrew T Crislip
bsky ⭐ pixiv ⭐ pillowfort ⭐ cohost
#i almost made him a benedictine monk but then we would've been reaching territory i do not feel like suffering through#generic medieval tag#i had more tags but i started talking politics and honestly if im going to talk politics i think its better to just make a post about it#i dont actually talk politics on tumblr even tho a lot of my work is extremely political in its subtext/text#because i think that tumblr is very annoying for that. its so anglo-american-western centric in its political theory#and i am WELL beyond that. i use twitter for politics because i love suffering lmao but also its like. still better for getting stuff done#komiks tag
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It's every iteration.
It's every iteration of V that will always find Johnny. Every iteration of V that Johnny grows to care about. It's every iteration of each other, in every universe, that will always find each other. They'll always become inseparable, tied together in unfathomable ways. Ways they could never truly unravel from each other in the end, no matter the end.
They'll always be destined for one another. No matter what face is worn. No matter what universe. No matter what, they're always meant to be. No matter what, the stars will always align for them, just to come crashing down from the sky.
#am i taking the simple fundamental process of the game's character creation and giving it a thematic metaphor? LOL yeah. yeah.#they are soulmates that traverse time and space and the laws of the fucking universe and they will always find each other#they are written in the fucking STARS man UGH I CANT#i bring forth my case to the tribunal court that they are destined to be literal fucking soulmates for the rest of ever and beyond#(and my case is just a manilla folder with a green sticky note slapped inside with 'Diagnosis: Sick In The Head#'Treatment: Should Probably Take A Nap or Something IDK'#scribbled in red)#((i haven't slept and i cant get them off my mind rn 😭#need to actually be brought out back bc HOW TF else am i meant to get sleep like this😭😭))#JUST THINK ABOUT IT THO#it doesn't matter what v looks like. their background or their history. fuck even their gender.#it doesnt matter what brand of asshole johnny what hes done or said in the memories weve seen#they are always going to find each other in whatever variation of their lives they find themselves in#its. sweet. (and doomed and heartbreaking bc the story will always end the same too it means they'll also always lose one or the other#AND NOW IM MAKING MYSELF INCONSOLABLE 😭😭)#(***whatever special brand of asshole Johnny is*** i HATE mobile plz just let me edit tags here too 😭)#this doesnt even have to be romantic either. they're destined to be each others literal soulmate no matter the label we put on them#silverv#cyberpunk 2077#johnny silverhand#v cyberpunk#masc v#fem v#nonbinary v#female v#male v#(clearing this from my drafts <3)#ult speaking#writing 💚💚#(bc why not)
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The one thing I still haven't seen anyone talking about when mentioning Xie Lian's gigantic statue that Hua Cheng carved when he was inside the kiln is that... Well, He Xuan also went into the kiln... years after Hua Cheng came out I'm pretty sure... Do you see where I'm going with this????
#what was He Xuan thinking#when after going through a wretched life bc of a god#after fighting his way through Mount Tonglu to become stronger and get revenge#and he's finally inside the kiln where he has to go through horrors beyond our comprehension for about a month#and skyscraper Xie Lian is just#THERE#staring at him#(well not actually STARING bc i'm pretty sure the eyes were closed#but you know what i mean#A GOD made him company during all that#what has He Xuan NOT had to endure at this point lmfao#nO WAIT I MADE IT EVEN FUNNIER#CAN YOU IMAGINE HE NEVER FINDS OUT WHO THE GOD INSIDE THE KILN IS NOR THAT HUA CHENG MADE IT UNTIL HE ACTUALLY MEETS XIE LIAN#just seeing xie lian for the first time and going 'wait. i. i recognize that face' LMFAOOOOO#no nononono wait#bc i mean if hx was spying for hc and waiting for the moment xl appeared again surely hc would have shown what xl looked like#so he could know him when he found him#did. did hx go 'hmmmm so is there any reason this dude looks like that statue inside the kiln or... wait wait did. did hc carve it???? did#he MAKE it????' and just. decided that it was Not His Problem and didn't ask???#did they have a conversation about the god statue inside the kiln#the Possibilities are ENDLESS#i am so sorry for putting the goddamn bible in the tags holy shit#i ramble#tgcf#mxtx#mxtx tgcf#hua cheng#xie lian#he xuan#black water sinking ships
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i think at this point kon fans who dont give a shit about bernard dowd deserve financial compensation
#rimi talks#every day i look at tags. and i really should stop giving people the bennies of the doubt#but i see a blacklisted post and i go ''well maybe they just mentioned the thing i blacklisted but theyre saying they also dont like it?''#so i click on the view post button. and then its exactly why i blacklisted the thing. and i sigh and have to block them#and you'd think at some point i'd just learn and go if theres a post mentioning that man in the kon tag i should just block op instantly.#that ones on me i know. but also. can any of you pick up superboy comics i am fucking begging#anyways. not to be a pretentious gatekeeper or elitist snob or whatever#but people who refuse to engage with media or characters beyond who theyre shipped with/common ship tropes are so annoying god bless.
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[excerpt from Stargate SG1, season 3 episode 22, "Nemesis"]
Just for the record, just to check, just to make it absolutely crystal clear..... I'm supposed to watch this interaction, and somehow not see it as peak romance????
I'm supposed to look at this, this raw moment of care and intimacy in the face of the danger of an almost certain death, and just see two guys being pals, two dudes being blokes, warriors' bond etc etc, and not basically an unspoken confession?
Like I'm not gonna lie, I straight up expected them to kiss there. I'm almost as surprised that they didn't as I would have been if they did.
This clip is framed so much like any romantic scene that I've seen (the focus on Jack's reflection in the visor, the seeming reluctance to fasten the visor down, the gentle urging to stay safe filled with pregnant pauses, the call and answer of reassurance and the soft tone of voice both characters use, the mournful, melodic music swelling in the background) that if one of them had been a woman, they would 100% have, and the only reason they didn't as is is that it was 1999.
I'm losing my fucking mind. I don't wish for the queerbaiting era of TV to be back by any stretch, but goddamn, did it produce some character relationships that tickle my brain just right.
#squirrel watches stargate#stargate#stargate sg1#seriously what they fuck am I looking at#i'm sure there is a tag for jack x teal'c but i'm not involved in the fandom beyond my little watchalong/liveblog posts#once i've watched everything maybe i will because WHAT the fuck is going on here#what is this queer nonsense (affectionate)(positive)#how am i supposed to see jack and sam as a thing when these two are clearly in love and sam has a daughter she's coparenting with fraiser#something something i knew it would happen not because of chemistry but because that's how straight people write shows
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Day three asking you to draw Matt .
I used to dislike Matt but i was wrong
fool! I've baited you into asking for matt MWAHHAHA
I SECRETLY already had the purple doodles drawn yesterday.....needed excuse to post him...and then doodled matt more because I like..him...
Matt's always been a fave of mine! I don't get how people could dislike whole characters but that might just be me finding ways to like them all(not tord) on account of the eternal fixation giving me too much time to think abt em
I almost feel like bad because I don't think my characterization is PARTICULARLY interesting but Idk I like em :3
sillier stuff


#jimbaskdoodles#ty for being my consistent matt asker YOU LIKE HIM and i like drawing him PERFECT SYSYTEM!!#user buttonboii being a consistent bfmt frequenter...#gay and trans doodle isnt real because matt could never put a label on himself because that makes it real and that terrifies him#..meow......#sorry about arbitrarily tending to include other characters also I AM capable of making them complex without including others i just..#REALLY like character interactions...#i like matt slighky more than i like character interactions..#matt does makeup and stuff but realistically hes too terrified to ever go beyond that and perishes without ever really exploring identity#or not idk hes not real maybe his life goes wonderful and girlboss#i DONT get how people read my tags specifically like DAMN even i aint reading allat#for the record i love reading other people's yapping tags :3 meow#ew matt#matt ew
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Hey, Jake & Jack fans, is this anything?
Both men imprisoned (literal & metaphorical).
Both offered an out from their current predicament by an outside force (arguably in the case of Brain Ghost Dirk).
Both have loose ties to Lord English visually.
Yellow initial glow & Gamzee involvement too.
Sometimes a guy just needs to explode (same pose too).
Both dual wielding weapons.
That same said weapon type (for Jack Noir) having killed Jane Crocker.
It's really looking like Jake is going to do her in.
I would also like to point out that we've had interactions involving these three (Jane, Jake, and Brain Ghost Dirk) before that consisted of similar topics & themes.
Brain Ghost Dirk implying that he's just there as moral support, a manifestation of Jake's powers, and as a coping mechanism. Jane also talking about ruling an empire with him while talking down to him, similar to how she saw and/or still sees him in Beyond Canon's Candy timeline. Jake also being uncertain about doing anything to harm her despite all the bad things she's doing.
Brain Ghost Dirk going away tells us that Jake's more hopeful than he's ever been. This is the moment where he is the most sure of his decisions than he's ever been in his life, whatever those decisions may be in regards to Jane and how to handle this situation.
He is probably going to shoot Jane down, quite literally. I would also argue that after all this time, the lad isn't beating the Lord English allegations. We might as well have a parallel of him killing Jane much like how Jack Noir killed her right before he got possessed by Lil Cal & given some of Lord English's immense power.
Alternatively maybe we'll get to see what the power of hope or hope bullets can do to someone whose done so much wrong & come so far off the deep end in terms of moral wrongdoings. Maybe with every shot that hits her, she'll begin to be swayed to the side of good & start to self-reflect.
I'm still not fully convinced that Gamzee actually cured Tavros' peanut allergy, I mean just look at the panel.
This could absolutely be interpreted as Jake injecting his hope power into the epipen and by proxy injecting both his power & the epipen into his son! If younger Jake is strong enough to defeat Grimbark Jade, then adult Jake might just be strong enough to defeat a peanut allergy is all I'm saying! In fact, now that I'm rambling about it, this seems like the more likely outcome is Jake's hope power swaying or (in the very least) confusing Jane mid-fight. Hope bullets, they would look cool & would be pretty strong!
The power of believing in others & wanting things to change can be a strong tool indeed, Mister English.
If there's one person who still believes in changing Jane's mind (or bringing her back to proper canonicity depending on how you interpret the recent lore), it would be Jake English, the believer.
Okay, maybe this is something! Tally ho!
#I have not seen anyone talk about the visual; story; & character parallels yet so allow me to jump up on this box real quick#gonna start shouting into this megaphone because holy crap I just now noticed this somehow only just now#I know & am aware some of these are probably a stretch & the order of events isn't exactly the same; but hear me out okay?#did the writing team remember & know they were doing this??? anyone feel free to answer or ask one of them on twitter I just want#to know out of pure curiosity though i can see how answering something like this might be spoiler territory this early into beyond canon#Jake is on the war path & I love that for him; I trust him to rage responsibly tbh#this started off as me being certain of one hs outcome; but now im more certain of the other; feel free to guess which is which#I'm not here to say whether I agree with Jake or disagree with how he's going to handle the Jane Crocker situation; I'm just doing analysis#& finding parallels that may or may not be intentional because at this point I'm honestly not sure; but i figured it was worth pointing out#jack noir lord english and jake english parallels real? only time will tell; but i look forward to the coming updates to hs^2 or hsbc#homestuck beyond canon#homestuck#jake english#homestuck^2#homestuck 2#jane crocker#jack noir#homestuck theory#brain ghost dirk#homestuck candy#cw blood#homestuck upd8#upd8#homestuck spoilers#also yes i avoided having the flashing images be flashing images on purpose; less hassle with tags & stuff & things even if it looks cool
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ladies of the conspiracy
porcia and tertulla! I have some thoughts about their appearances in the scraps of the historical conspiracy that are visible (since it's like. the nature of conspiracy, even one as widely known and studied as the one leading up to the assassination of caesar, means that there's a gap in visibility with the details etc) that I'll have to try and pin down later, but for now, I think we should give them a dagger too
Brutus, the Noble Conspirator, Kathryn Tempest
Junia too, the niece of Cato, wife of Caius Cassius and sister of Marcus Brutus, died this year, the sixty-fourth after the battle of Philippi. Her will was the theme of much popular criticism, for, with her vast wealth, after having honourably mentioned almost every nobleman by name, she passed over the emperor. Tiberius took the omission graciously and did not forbid a panegyric before the Rostra with the other customary funeral honours. The busts of twenty most illustrious families were borne in the procession, with the names of Manlius, Quinctius, and others of equal rank. But Cassius and Brutus outshone them all, from the very fact that their likenesses were not to be seen.
Tacitus, Annals III.76
#porcia catonis#tertulla#or. hm.#Junia Tertia#might be a better tag if i ever get around to drawing caesar with crassus' wife#drawing tag#roman republic tag#im giving them brutus-cassius parallels on purpose#conspiratorial mirrors or something. i swear i have a coherent thought about this beyond: lesbians#i am just SO tired right now. im going to make coffee and take a nap#you might say 'wait the family tree--' we aren't doing anything brutus didn't do first. or servilia. their family tree is an onion
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I am way too tired/jetlagged to make this post right now, but the reason Armada Starscream is so specifically well done to me actually isn't just the way he's got more depth than just wanting to take over Megatron. It's the way he falls back on this image he has of himself as someone who is solely focused on Megatron. And he is obsessed with Megatron, but the disconnect between Starscream and his image of himself is what gives him actual depth.
The reason this is so cool to me is like, that self-image--that he is single-mindedly obsessed with Megatron and will sacrifice everything else for that goal, no matter who gets hurt--is pretty close to what every other Starscream is. (The selfishness you associate with Starscream is a little more subtle, but it's there in the "no matter who gets hurt" clause imo.)
So if you go into this as a Transformers fan, you're already expecting Starscream to betray Megatron and try to best him and rule the Decepticons. But so does Starscream, even when he's demonstrably proven to both his peers and the audience that he's more than that. It's almost like his past incarnations--or the audience's expectation of him--haunt him. It turns his own internal man-versus-self conflict into this really cool man-versus-narrative conflict.
And what's crazy about this is, through the last moments of this arc, Starscream does grow beyond the narrative we'd expect from other Starscreams! But he never admits that to himself, because it's easier for him to cling to the idea that he's laser-focused on his hatred of Megatron. Every time he helps the minicons--every time he helps the humans--even in his last words, he LIES to himself and everyone around him that everything he did was always about Megatron. Because it's easier to simplify himself than to grasp that he might be a complex character. Because he's a person and he has all the messy conflicts that come with that. He falls back on the same ideas every single other Starscream did, and THAT is his undoing. Not that he is self-centered because he's Starscream. Not that he is obsessed with Megatron because he's Starscream. That he THINKS he is all of those things and he will not LET himself be anything else.
I would argue that that's a bigger theme in Armada, as well. Optimus and Megatron more or less spend their final fight coming to terms with their story roles in Transformers. I really feel like if you sneezed on them, they would realize they do this in every universe and in every timeline. Starscream's is the most interesting example to me, though, because he's such a departure from other versions of Starscream; hell, he acts (and looks, lol) a lot more like some incarnations of Thundercracker. But he's still got classic Starscream in him in this roundabout meta reference. He's like an homage to his namesake. It's so cool! And it works perfectly with the story he's a part of.
#transformers armada#armada starscream#so. this part goes in the tags but. if you know me or recognize my url you may be going ''half life fan take''#especially given that this is by far my favorite starscream that i have ever seen#I am beating zero half life/valve gaming allegations with this one#but imo this is a reminder to me that like. the best meta media is always the kind that doesnt shout it out#i mean. generally the more you have to handhold your audience on what the media is about. the more it is bad#unless it's specifically really dialectal media aimed at young children and the directness is like. The Point#(wild robot being a good example of very obvious media meant for kids that is still clearly like. fantastic)#but in general i think meta media (metagames and the like) kinda lose their impact when you have to explain them#people forget that half life doesn't really hold your hand about this#because valve games are so entrenched in internet culture#it goes beyond ''the one free man'' as an icon - the game is about the horror of being a video game player character#and especially of being a silent protagonist#gordon's helplessness in the plot and the way he's ''the one free man'' but not free is a commentary on how games funnel you through their#stories while acting like the player character has any agency#gman's ability to teleport players around various environments and even to/from stasis is similar to how gamedevs load/unload characters#and teleport them around cutscenes and environments when the player cant see them#he gives them just enough freedom to feel natural while keeping tight control over their purpose in the story he is telling. like an author#SIMILARLY. this is why you can't do myhouse.wad again#part of the horror of myhouse.wad is the familiarity of it and the subtle offputting changes from standard doom mapping FOR DOOM PLAYERS#even down to how it was released#it isnt just a silly meta internet horror game everything about it was purpose-built to send goosebumps specifically to doom modders and#classic doom enthusiasts#ANYWAYS. ARMADA IS LIKE THIS TO ME#behind all the anime nonsense and the like 20 filler episodes in the start there's a genuinely clever commentary on like#transformers as a franchise and as a story that keeps getting retold#THERE'S MORE TO IT THAN THAT BUT YOU GET MY POINT.
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the fuuuckkkkkk shitbox personal relationship drama for the mutuals who are interested in hearing abt my beef. Ass this one's for you
I had a dream last night the girl I am very notably Only Friends with Rn (she said no flirting 🤕) texted me something like "i like you too much I can't do this I can't be really dependent on someone at this time in my life" and I had to be like damn okay bc like im disappointed I won't be able to have this relationship but I have "this shit ain't nothin to me man" disease so I can't be like "stick around so I can barely love you and take you out to dinner sometimes". But luckily this was a dream so I don't actually have to deal with this.
upon rational wakeful consideration this would actually never happen because in high school she told me my personality is like. not noble enough for her I guess so she's never gonna be That Into me (okay she offhandedly said this once) (the REAL reason she wasn't into me in high school is because my relationship (very close/affectionate friends) w her was inadvertently the final straw that caused her first serious boyfriend to break up with her, and the whole ordeal was really messy and painful so my involvement with it kinda fucked our relationship up) (their relationship wasnt even that good in the first place & she told me she's not ready for a real romantic relationship bc she doesn't want to be overly dependent on anyone like she was with him, which is why I had this dream, but she does think I'm attractive so like maybe we can cuddle on the couch sometime) where was i. Right she's never gonna be That into me, probably, which is great because I have mental diseases, and a little part of my head is going WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING HERE about it & to that I say. Literally nothing, we are straight up just friends rn bc she takes things very slowly & I'm no longer clinging to the idea that getting her to love me would mean I'm a Good Person (i no longer gaf) so actually I am just chilling here. nothing is happening. but also what the fuck
#shitboxposting#paramourposting#<- not really but I already started using that tag. literal nothing burger relationship on the surface rn#but like the iceberg is actually kinda deep now that im thinking abt it. might be a significant reason my self image is Like That#who am I kidding it's definitely a big reason. so why am I in a situationship with her again? well you see.#i cannot get close to new people on my Fucking life so I need to take whatever crumbs I can get from people I already know.#2.50$ says our relationship will actually not go beyond just friendship & im just being a fool by thinking it could be anything else#UUUGH WHATEVER ive invited a gaggle of bisexuals to make pot brownies with me this weekend . IDGAF!!#this shit is nothing to me man my dick is too big for this
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Do you conlang? I was wondering if you had naming languages (or possibly even more developed ones) for pulling the words you use. I tried to search your blog but didn't find anything, wouldn't be surprised if the feature is just busted tho. Your worldbuilding is wonderful and I particularly enjoy the anthropological and linguistic elements.
Ok the thing is I had kind of decided I was not going to do any conlanging because I don't feel like I'm equipped to do a good job of it, like was fully like "I'm just going to do JUST enough that it doesn't fail an immediate sniff test and is more thoughtful than just keysmashing and putting in vowels". And then have kinda been conlanging anyway (though not to a very deep and serious extent. I maybe have like....an above average comprehension of how language construction works via willingness to research, but that's not saying much, also I can never remember the meanings of most linguistic terms like 'frictives' or etc off the top of my head. I'm just kinda raw dogging it with a vague conceptualization of what these things mean)
I do at least have a naming language for Wardi (and more basic rules for other established languages) but the rudimentary forms of it were devised with methods much shakier and less linguistically viable than even the most basic naming language schemes, and I only went back over it LONG after I had already made a bunch of words so there's some inconsistencies with consonant presence and usage. (This can at least be justified because it IS a language that would have a lot of loanwords and would be heavily influenced by other language groups- Burri being by far the most significant, Highland-Finnic and Yuroma-Lowlands also being large contributors)
The 'method' I used was:
-Skip basic construction elements and fully move into devising necessary name words, with at least a Vibe of what consonants are going to be common and how pronunciation works -Identify some roots out of the established words and their meanings. Establish an ongoing glossary of known roots/words. -Construct new words based in root words, or as obvious extensions/variants of established words. -Get really involved in how the literal meanings of some words might not translate properly to english, mostly use this to produce a glossary of in-universe slang. -Realize that I probably should have at least some very basic internal consistency at this point. -Google search tutorials on writing a naming language. -Reverse engineer a naming language out of established words, and ascribe all remaining inconsistencies to being loanwords or just the mysteries of life or whatever.
I do at least have some strongly established pronunciation rules and a sense of broad regional dialect/accents.
-'ai' words are almost always pronounced with a long 'aye' sound.
-There is no 'Z' or 'X' sound, a Wardi speaker pronouncing 'zebra' would go for 'tsee-brah', and would attempt 'xylophone' as 'ssye-lohp-hon'
-'V' sounds are nearly absent and occur only in loanwords, and tend to be pronounced with a 'W' sound. 'Virsum' is a Highland word (pronounced 'veer-soom') denoting ancestry, a Wardi speaker would go 'weer-sum'.
-'Ch' spellings almost always imply a soft 'chuh' sound when appearing after an E, I, or O (pelatoche= pel-ah-toh-chey), but a hard 'kh' sound after an A or U (odomache= oh-doh-mah-khe). When at the start of a word, it's usually a soft 'ch' unless followed by an 'i' sound (chin (dog) is pronounced with a hard K 'khiin', cholem (salt) is pronounced with a soft Ch 'cho-lehm')
-Western Wardin has strong Burri cultural and linguistic influence, and a distinct accent- one of the most pronounced differences is use of the ñ sound in 'nn' words. The western city of Ephennos is pronounced 'ey-fey-nyos' by most residents, the southeastern city of Erubinnos is pronounced 'eh-roo-been-nos' by most residents. Palo's surname 'Apolynnon' is pronounced 'A-puh-lee-nyon' in the Burri and western Wardi dialects (which is the 'proper' pronunciation, given that it's a Kos name), but will generally be spoken as 'Ah-poh-leen-non' in the south and east.
-R's are rolled in Highland-Finnic words. Rolling R's is common in far northern rural Wardi dialects but no others. Most urban Wardi speakers consider rolling R's sort of a hick thing, and often think it sounds stupid or at least uneducated. (Brakul's name should be pronounced with a brief rolled 'r', short 'ah' and long 'uul', but is generally being pronounced by his south-southeastern compatriots with a long unrolled 'Brah' sound).
Anyway not really a sturdy construction that will hold up to the scrutiny of someone well equipped for linguistics but not pure bullshit either.
#I actually did just make a post about this on my sideblog LOL I think in spite of my deciding not to conlang this is going to go full#full conlanging at some point#The main issue is that the narrative/dialogue is being written as an english 'translation' (IE the characters are speaking in their actual#tongues and it's being translated to english with accurate meaning but non-literal treatment)#Which you might say like 'Uh Yeah No Shit' but I think approaching it with that mindset at the forefront does have a different effect than#just fully writing in english. Like there's some mindfulness to what they actually might be saying and what literal meanings should be#retained to form a better understanding of the culture and what should be 'translated' non-literally but with accurate meaning#(And what should be not translated at all)#But yeah there's very little motivation for conlanging besides Pure Fun because VERY few Wardi words beyond animal/people/place names#will make it into the actual text. Like the only things I leave 'untranslated' are very key or untranslatable concepts that will be#better understood through implication than attempts to convey the meaning in english#Like the epithet 'ganmachen' is used to compliment positive traits associated with the ox zodiac sign or affectionately tease#negative ones. This idea can be established pretty naturally without exposition dumps because the zodiac signs are of cultural#importance and will come up frequently. The meaning can get across to the reader pretty well if properly set up.#So like leaving it as 'ganmachen' you can get 'oh this is an affectionate reference to an auspicious zodiac sign' but translating#it as the actual meaning of 'ox-faced' is inevitably going to come across as 'you look like a cow' regardless of any zodiac angle#^(pretty much retyped tags from other post)#Another aspect is there's a few characters that have Wardi as a second language and some of whom don't have a solid grasp on it#And I want to convey this in dialogue (which is being written in english) but I don't want it to just be like. Random '''broken''' english#like I want there to be an internal consistency to what parts of the language they have difficulties with (which then has implications for#how each language's grammar/conjugation/etc works). Like Brakul is fairly fluent in Wardi at the time of the story but still struggles#with some of the conjugation (which is inflectional in Wardi) especially future/preterite tense. So he'll sometimes just use the#verb unconjugated or inappropriately in present tense. Though this doesn't come across as starkly in text because it's#written in english. Like his future tense Wardi is depicted as like 'I am to talk with him later' instead of 'I'll talk with him later'#Which sounds unnatural but not like fully incorrect#But it would sound much more Off in Wardi. Spanish might be a better example like it would be like him approaching it with#'Voy a hablar con él más tarde' or maybe 'Hablo con él más tarde' instead of 'Hablaré con él más tarde'#(I THINK. I'm not a fluent spanish speaker sorry if the latter has anything wrong with it too)
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