#i can also imagine it drives andrew crazy

[achillean-heartbeat]

good afternoon beautiful people i am going sick in the head thinking of Neil wearing his orange bandana. just neil and his bandana,,, yeah,,,

[ninyard]

You're thinking of him going to class the first day after the trial - but what about all the day before the trial even began? When none of his classmates had any idea what happened or what could have happened or why he did it? All they knew was that he killed someone with an exy stick (if even that). And given that he's Andrews twin - Andrew who /was/ in juvie for being to aggressive - what's to say that Aaron isn't the same? What,now they have two homicidal on their campus but they are also on the deranged exy team? I cant imagine what that would have been like

Oh lord.

Like the thought of Aaron sitting in his last class of the day the day before the trial watching the time tick down and he’s felt sick to his stomach for weeks now, but it’s so much worse now that it’s so close. He can barely sit still, he’s been driving Katelyn crazy for days, let’s do this, let’s go here, let’s go there, let’s keep my mind busy so I can’t think about the fact I might be going to prison next week.

The time ticks down, and he knows he’s not going to sleep that night, and he sees the way his classmates look at him. How heads turned when one of his curious friends asked how he was feeling about everything. He can’t look them in the eyes when he says everything’s fine.

But it’s not just him, it’s not just his classmates, it’s everyone. Everyone is making him feeling fucking weird. All of his teammates are skirting around this massive elephant in the room, people are avoiding talking to him in case the trial comes up. Coach looks at him with pity. Abby looks at him like he’s a helpless lamb. Betsy sends her encouragement and kindness but she knows better than anyone what’s coming.

Aaron knows Andrew has spent two or three hours a week in Bee’s little office. He can see how Neil is doing the same thing everyone else is doing; he doesn’t know how to deal with Andrew when he’s so wound up and internally anxious. Andrew hadn’t showed up to practice for the past week. Rumour had it that he hadn’t even been doing his night practices with Kevin.

Aaron is not an insecure person, but the way everyone tiptoes around the reality of what is to come drives him crazy with self consciousness. He feels how his classmates have quietened down their conversations when he walks in. Even one of his professors kept him back after class to tell him not to worry about his final paper - she knew he was under a lot of stress, in her words, and he was already getting straight A’s in her class anyway. I did it! He wants to scream at them all. And I can’t deal with the fact that you’re going to find out why! He would rather they call him a monster to his face, than know they’re talking about him now in the way they’ve spent years talking about Andrew.

He feels guilt, in a way, seeing Andrew in as much of a state as he is. Knowing because of what he did to Drake, he was going to have to tell the world what had happened to him. Andrew was recounting his trauma and braving the witness stand just to keep Aaron out of danger. And that kills Aaron. Because he loves his brother, and he’s going crazy with worry and fear, the outcome of the case in the hands of the jury from the morning after.

[nerdasaurus1200]

Imagine (modern au, obv) Eugene becomes captain of the Nine Nine when Holt is demoted to patrol officer, and meets The Vulture. The whole running joke is that he swears he knows this guy, he seems so familiar like he has definitely heard his voice before but he can’t place it, it drives him crazy, and that’s why he hates The Vulture.

Get it, because he and Andrew are both played by- I’ll see myself out.

(Also, Rosa x Cass)

Oh man that would be frigging hilarious. I could just imagine Eugene going through the mental list of like everyone he’s ever met being all “Who the heck is this guy??? I swear to god I know his voice!”

Also funny story, Andrew’s VA is actually also in a ton of insurance commercials 😂 And lately they’ve been showing up on my tv a lot more cause I’m watching a little less streaming and everytime those commercials come on I’m like “Andrew!!”

Also bonus funny story, I have almost this exact same thought about a Hazbin/Tangled crossover. Lucifer and Varian meeting and no one can tell the difference in their voices.

[stanleyl]

Tom suffers more than jesus it's crazy😭

Imagine having an insecure father jealous of you talent and your career, incels that constantly compare your Spidey to Tobey or Andrew, you gf stans who hate you for being a great bf and hate on on you unprovoked whilst wishing cheating rumors between her and her costars, some male actors agents and publicists making snide remarks on your career and downplaying your success in order to puff up their clients, your own agents who don't want you to take your career seriously because in order for them to have their % of your money you need to be stuck in souless sequels so they can maintain their fuckass lifestyle, whilst your loyal fans are just waiting for some or one casting rumor so you can finally get an organic fanbase and public support and respect as a great actor and a good person. Like I'm tired of him being a walking meme. It's so demeaning for a late 20 something year old to be infantilised like this.

Let's be real. Most people in that industry are not good ppl, yet Tom gets the abnormal amount of critique because ppl hang on to his previous comments or words and use it against him. Also, I forgot to mention your name drives clicks😭

Take his pain and give it to the leader of isnotreal😭😭😭

Bro 😭

[look-at-the-soul]

Look at the soul -Part 3 It’s my life

Series Master list

Cillian Murphy x OC

✨ Sorry it took me this long, I was a bit stuck in this part… but I’m hoping the story will flow from here 🎭

🌻 Also you know me, I love involving reader’s names as a special thank you for your constant support and encouragement, if you haven’t seen yours don’t worry, there’s lots of chapters ahead xx

Song: It’s my life- Bon Jovi

 “Will you come to the theater?” Was the first thing Enda asked Cillian over the phone. 

“Good morning to you, I’m good thanks.” Cillian replied with sarcasm while pouring some coffee for himself. 

“We don’t need those formalities, I’ve seen you drunk, you’ve seen me emptying my stomach…” Cillian could imagine his friend pulling his own face from the desperation. “Do you think she will show up?” 

“For the sake of my marriage I hope she does!” Cillian heard Joeleen’s voice in the background. 

“Poor Joe, she deserves an award for living with you.” He knew Enda had the call on speaker.

“He’s driving me crazy Cill! Can you adopt him?” Joeleen’s voice again. 

Cillian chuckled and heard the familiar steps of his sons upstairs, taking a quick glance at the clock, he realized they still had time. 

“My hands are full at the moment, but I will let you know if there’s an open spot.” He joked. 

As they said their goodbyes, the toasts were ready and his mood on spot that morning. Scout joined him in the kitchen yawning, the smell of food always did the trick for him. 

“What do you think, hmm?” Cillian asked the black Labrador who lifted on his back paws and rested the front ones against his body. Bending down he scratched Scout’s head. “Will she accept to be in the play?” 

What were the chances of finding the perfect person to play a part in the middle of the day?

These kind of things rarely happen, it’s like winning the lottery. 

But it also reminded him a lot of the way he stared in theater, all of those years and he could still remember the first time he held a script in his hands.

Someone once told him, the story should both excite and scare you at the same time, there was no other way around.

“It’s been a while since I’ve done theater.” Cillian continued with his one way conversation. ”But if is meant to happen, I think it would be a good chance to try.”

He had been busy in other projects and well, then the tragedy that made him pause his life happened.

“I like it when you’re on stage da.” His youngest son, Ben joined him. 

Cillian raised his eyebrows in surprise. 

“You do?” Maybe he heard him wrong. 

Ben took the toast and sipped at his shake, but since his mouth was full, he nodded eagerly. 

Leaning against the stove, Cillian crossed his arms, savoring Ben’s words for a moment. 

“It’s a beautiful script.” He mumbled more to himself than anything. 

“You always say that.” Andrew pinched his brother and a round of complaints started.  

“Finish your breakfast, I will be at the theater for the rest of the day, your aunt Sile will pick you up.” 

“Can we go to the movies?” Ben asked with a big smile. 

It seemed like ages ago when he last enjoyed something like that, something as a regular as a night out watching a film. 

“Yeah, take your cousins with ya, and don’t let Sile pay, no matter what she says.” He took some bills from his wallet and handed them to Andrew, his oldest.  

“Tell him he has to share that with me, the last time he didn’t give me money for popcorn.” Ben asked. 

Cillian shot Andrew a glance. “Hey, if you do that I will take your phone for a week.” 

“Dad!”  

“Zip it, eat your breakfast you’re going to be late.” 

Ben stared at his father in silence. “You look weird without the beard, good actually.” 

Cillian blushed and let out an uncomfortable laugh at his son’s compliment.  

“It was getting too complicated to maintain.” 

“You don’t look so old now.” Teased Andrew.  

 Cillian wrapped his arm around his son’s neck, in a wrestling motion and bending him down, he asked: “who are you calling old now, hmm?” 

Andrew’s face immediately became red as he pleaded his father to release him. 

Laughs and joy filled the kitchen, a deep contrast with the silence and awkwardness they have been moving around the last couple of months. 

“Right, now go and be good, see you for dinner.” 

“Bye Dad!” Ben gave him a quick hug and ran off to the door. At ten years old, he still gave dad a hug, he actually started to do it more frequently after losing his mother. Cillian wondered how long it would last.. 

“Love you.” Cillian didn’t get a response as he waved at them. “Love you too.” He answered to himself.

“Wish me luck.” He asked Scout right before going out.

Being completely honest with himself, he was so nervous for the outcome, they still didn’t have Marianne’s confirmation to be in the play, and he also couldn't even start to name his feelings towards the whole thing, to be on stage one more time after so long.

But deep down, he knew if there was something that could actually save him was this, to be able to perform, to leave his heart and soul every night on stage.

Stepping in the theater brought back so many memories for him, it was almost as if he could see himself from the outside messing around, carefree, following his instincts, having fun, enjoying every second of it. He wouldn’t change anything. 

There’s something magical about a stage play that you don’t get on a film, it’s all about owning the stage the moment the lights go down and surrender completely to the audience until they start the ovation. It’s about getting rid of all the mental chains every single night. 

And he wanted to do it again. 

More than anything. 

“I swear you’re driving me crazy Enda, you can’t make a change like this in the last minute.” Heidi walked from backstage with Enda following her steps, she was his right hand for the play they were rehearsing. And apparently, she just found out about Enda’s wish to stop his current play to focus on ‘Look at the soul’. “We’re just a month away of the big opening.” 

“Six weeks.” Corrected Enda in a low voice, hiding his hands inside the pockets of his jeans. 

“Excuse me?!”  

“I said we’ve six weeks to make this happen.” If only his walking miracle with long dark hair and green eyes and a smile that could stop the traffic would walk through the corridor. “We’ll need just a couple of adjustments.” 

“Did Marianne confirm you already?” 

“No.” Enda shook his head. “But I’m hoping she will.” 

“Why are you making changes if you’re not sure yet?” Heidi deserved an award for her patience towards Enda, he could be a maniac sometimes. 

“Maybe she’s still reading the script.” Enda tried to justify as he leaned against the column. 

“Tell him he’s crazy?” Heidi looked at Cillian pleading he would take her side. 

“He is.” Cillian admitted with a smile. “But I will have to agree with him this time.” 

“What am I supposed to tell the investors?” 

“That we have a bombshell in our hands.” 

Just because he had the script written, it doesn’t mean you can turn it into a play overnight, rehearsals take months, wardrobe, music, the set… 

“You’re pushing her to her limits.” Cillian pointed towards the path Heidi was taking, mumbling something to herself. 

“I’m sure she will find a way.” 

Cillian looked at his clock. 

Would Marianne find the play interesting enough? 

“Do you want to see the bar I’ve got for this? It was backstage.” 

“No. I’m going to get a coffee.” Because it was too early for a pint, he thought. 

“There’s a coffee machine here.” 

“Enda, your plays are great, but your coffee is shit.”  

His friend faked indignation. “Ungrateful bitch.” 

Truth is this was making him feel anxious, worse than waiting for a call about a role for a movie. So he decided to walk to the coffee shop that was close to the theater. 

*** 

This ain't a song for the broken-hearted No silent prayer for faith-departed

Coming down from the bus, Marianne started to pay attention to the familiar song that randomly started to play through her headphones.

And I ain't gonna be just a face in the crowd You're gonna hear my voice when I shout it out loud

This couldn't be more fitting, more perfect.

It perfectly described part of her feelings right there.

It's my life It's now or never

Finding an empty spot at the park, Marianne sat at the bench with the script on her lap. 

My heart is like an open highway Like Frankie said, "I did it my way"

Her mind re-playing the conversations she had with two close people over and over. 

The impact of what we say stays imprinted in the mind, and it can either encourage us or make us quit.

They both thought she was joking about the way the script came to her, that she couldn’t be serious about accepting the role. She had a promising career, a job promotion waiting back home once she finished her master degree. 

Feeling deflated and with so many doubts in her heart, she crossed the street. 

The autumn breeze made her shiver. Or maybe it was the goosebumps after watching the theater from a couple of meters away. 

She believed firmly some opportunities come and knock on your door directly. While other people keep waiting all their lives for it.

Was this her one in a million?

It surely wasn’t something she expected, neither planned to happen in her life. And it sounded like a chance she couldn’t miss.

But she also knew the scholarship she got was a huge responsibility she couldn’t just turn down. Could she manage to do both? 

Her eyes were fixed on the big billboard that announced the Olympia Theater. 

Imposing, majestic.  

What if she wasn’t made for this? If she got scared in the middle of the play? She wasn’t scared of the project, she was afraid of being able to perform onstage.

A million thoughts crossed her mind as a bunch of people walked past her, in a rush, would any of them be interested in going to a play starring her?

What if no one liked that a foreigner was the leading role?

The story was so interesting, the character had her full attention from the first lines, Adria’s pain was so palpable and heartbreaking, some parts of her dialogue playing in the back of her mind like a song you can’t stop thinking about.

It felt just like the previous seconds right before jumping, when your heart is beating to the maximum capacity and you see your life flashing by. The scariest moment before the calmness.

Closing her eyes for an instant, Marianne took a deep breath.

“Flip a coin.” Said a deep voice next to her, pulling her out of her thoughts. “If you have doubts, just flip a coin.”  

It was Cillian walking towards her, a coffee cup in his hand. His face was completely shaved, he looked like a different person. 

“This is deeper than leaving an important decision to fate, right?” Marianne asked. 

“Because in the few seconds that the coin is in the air, you will see what side of the coin your heart desires, and that’s exactly what you should do.” 

His words were so right. They felt so right, just what she needed to hear.

“But I don’t think you came all the way just say that you don’t want to do this.” 

“Have you done this before?” 

Even though she didn’t answer directly, he could already see the yes in her eyes. The answer burning from the inside. There was so much of herself that reminded him of the old Cillian.

Cillian nodded and his blue eyes sparkled. “But every night feels like it’s the first time.” 

“Why is the knot in my stomach growing?” 

“Because you really want to give this a shot.” 

“What if I’m not what you’re expecting?” 

Cillian arched his eyebrow. “Is this the same woman that broke a mirror in the middle of an audition?” 

Marianne opened her mouth to apologize for that, but Cillian interrupted her. 

“I think you were born for this role, Adria has been waiting for you all this time.” 

The firm statement made her feel goosebumps, her mind and heart holding a battle.

There was something about Cillian that made her feel secure, he had assured her he would be by her side every step of the way as some kind of mentor or coach.

 Heidi looked at her watch and Enda thought it was time to get some fresh air, or he would get a heart attack. Walking outside, he decided to go and find his friend.

But to his surprise, he didn’t need to walk a lot, because he found Cillian sitting on the steps outside the theater, with a woman who slowly turned her head around, gifting him a head tilt and a kind smile.

“No fucking way!” Enda could hardly contain his excitement. “You’re here!”

The screenplay writer rushed down the theater steps to give his leading role a hug.

“Thank you, you’re not going to regret this.”

Marianne’s face relaxed at his enthusiasm, it was contagious and it felt like she made the right decision.

Enda ushered them inside, and after providing Heidi some instructions for the changes, Cillian and Marianne followed him to the rehearsals room.

“K, now let me hear about your requests.”

Marianne looked at him confused.

“He means the terms and conditions you want in your contract.” Cillian offered her a warm smile. “It usually doesn’t work like that, but it looks like you have him eating from your hand.” He then winked at her.

“Well, I just don’t want to assume anything,” Enda leaned forwards on the table, willing to give her anything, Cillian took a pen and paper to write it down, “but I won’t under any circumstance make a naked scene.”

“Those scenes aren’t part of this play, don’t worry.” Enda assured he.

Marianne shook her head. “Doesn’t matter.”

“Got it.” Pointed Cillian. “What else?”

“I need another job to pay for my expenses, I can help with everything you need, budget, accounting, administration...”

But before Enda could answer he couldn’t afford another salary, Cillian interrupted him.

“I will take care of that.”

Adjusting his specs on is nose, Enda asked his friend: “are you going to pay for that or what?”

“Lets get to the next point, I will tell you later.” He answered. “Did you know that she studied Finance?” Cillian touched his head with the pen indicating that she had a brain they shouldn’t ignore and encouraged Marianne to continue.

“Rehearsals and the play cannot overlap my MBA studies, I fought so hard to win my scholarship and if I fail, they can take it away.”

“Got it, school is a priority.” Cillian wrote down, far too excited for her compromise.

“We can make it work.”

“Charity.”

Enda made a face. “I’m not following.”

“I want the play to be involved in charity and I want to be part of it, you can pick the association, it can be kids with special needs, single mothers, pets looking for family...”

Cillian nodded. “We can donate a percentage of certain dates too.”

“I don’t have money to give it away, we barely get back what we invest... I’m not the bloody barefoot nuns!”

“Stop whining, we can do it.” Cillian supported her idea. He was enjoying way too much this negotiation.

Enda turned red. “We can? Since when you get to make executive decisions?” He took off his glasses. “Are you now co-owner of this play?”

“Yeah, I will send you a cheque tomorrow.”

“Excuse me? When did you get promoted from narrator to partner?”

Marianne was looking from one man to the other.

“Do you want her in your play or not?” Standing up, Cillian pointed at Marianne, then leaned his palms on the table and fixed his eyes on his friend. “Do you realize she’s not asking anything for herself? She’s not asking for a driver to take her from school to the theater in a limo, or another apartment because she lives on the other side of the city, she’s asking to share part of the profits and do something good for someone else. We can do a few extra nights to recover, get more sponsorship.”

“Fine... you can have your charity.” Enda rubbed his eyes.

Cillian looked at her with a pleased smile, sticking his tongue out while writing the request.

“I didn’t know I could ask for a driver.” Marianne teased in a low voice, but it was enough for Enda to hear. There was no need, she could easily move around in bus. Cillian tried to hide his smile.

“No, you can’t.” Enda leaned on the chair for support, maybe the driver was a better idea, but now it was late to suggest it.

“I would like my mom to see the play.”

“Oh for God’s sake!”

Cillian had to wipe away the tears that formed in he corner of his eyes and suppress a laugh.

“Plane ticket for mom.” He wrote down.

“Are you her manager now?”

Marianne looked at Cillian, expectation in her eyes. Another smile formed on his lips when he looked back at Enda.

“Yeah, since like... right now.”

Sighing, Enda sat on his chair across the table, he lost the battle. “I’m just going to ask you for a favor...” He managed to say after a few seconds in silence.

“Hey, you have to make the negotiation with her new manager.” Cillian raised his hand as if he was in a classroom.

“I have two more plays on hold in which I want you to participate.” Enda mumbled.

Cillian pointed his pen at him. “Give her the leading role and I will put it in her contract.”

After a nod, Enda extended his hand to Cillian, who shook it eagerly, he had an idea of what plays he was talking about and he already knew they would be a smashing hit.

“Let’s do this!” Cillian offered Marianne his hand and then pulled her for a hug.

“Thank you.” She then went to hug Enda as well, after drinking some water, he looked more relaxed now.

“Welcome dear, you’re going to love it.”

A big and inviting smile decorated her features, her eyes were sparkling as she looked between them.

Cillian asked her to find Heidi to get her measurements for the wardrobe as soon as possible. When she left the room, his eyes stayed on the door.

Enda stared at him. “It’s so good to have you back, I fucking missed you.”

Cillian nodded, suddenly the emotions were a mess inside his chest. Finally feeling some kind of relief.

Truth is, he had missed himself as well.

“Oh! By the way… are you going to cover her extra salary?”

Crossing his arms in front of him, Cillian looked at his friend with a cocky expression. “I’m going to ask her to work for me in my production company.”

****

Next part

Tag list:

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[denimbex1986]

'In order for you not to feel anything from All of Us Strangers, you almost have to suffer from chronic apathy - or a coma. It's rarely classy to casually praise a film unless it actually deserves it, but All of Us Strangers demands praise. The director behind the film is Andrew Haigh (Weekend) who probably reached his creative peak with this film. If not, a bright future awaits.

The plot follows the reclusive TV scriptwriter Adam , played by the brilliant Andrew Scott , who lives a reclusive and rather lonely existence in London. After meeting their drunken neighbor Harry, portrayed by Paul Mescal , they begin a passionate relationship. Adam also encounters visions of his dead parents, played by Jamie Bell and Claire Foy , and relives moments from his past in his old childhood home.

The visions of his parents make Adam question whether several events or happenings in his life are merely a product of his imagination or actual reality.

The moment of redemption – the relief of reconciliation

The film deals with so many layers of the human nature that it almost feels overwhelming to untangle. Adam's loneliness and the raw questions surrounding his sexuality, along with the childhood trauma he experienced following the tragic death of his parents, result in many pieces of his emotional puzzle still missing. He seems to live in a constant limbo between his past and the ability to move on.

The scenes where Adam tentatively seeks absolution and comfort from his parents in his childhood home are both heartfelt and fragile. Everything that Adam experienced during his upbringing and in his adult life, the absence of his parents, he now seeks their understanding and blessing for. 

The redemptive moments when Adam reunites with both his parents in understanding and forgiveness are a cinematic primordial force. The parents' inadequacy and misunderstanding of Adam's person at a young age is gradually sorted out, and as an audience you desperately hope that it will result in a satisfying climax.

At one point, Adam apologizes for constantly waking his mother every night to sleep in his parents' bed, to which his mother says – I'm sorry I didn't enjoy you driving me crazy.

In another strong scene, the family celebrates Christmas together. When the song "Always on my mind" plays, the mother and father spontaneously start singing along and quickly realize that the lyrics reflect their feelings and flaws towards Adam - a scene as beautiful as it is thought-provoking.

Two lonely souls – each other's medicine

The love story with Harry feels completely uncontrived, genuinely passionate and clinically pure. The line "I'll protect you from the hooded claw, keep the vampires from your door" from the song "Power of Love" by Frankie Goes to Hollywood is played when Adam and Harry first meet, and reappears later in the film. Harry symbolizes the piece that Adam is missing in his happiness puzzle and the power that protects him from that which saps him of joy and happiness. 

Both Harry and Adam are two lonely individuals who are in equal need of each other's company and love in order to find belonging.

The film touches on many aspects of life that ordinary people reflect on all the time. The ability to dare to let someone into your life and let this person help you, love you and challenge you. No one wants to go through life and only be a stranger to their surroundings. Interactions with strangers can be paths to self-realization and personal growth if we only learn to open our hearts and minds to the unknown.

The acting performances, script work, music score – yes the whole movie overall, leaves me with a feeling of gratitude as I leave the theater. A few times in my life, this feeling has appeared after a visit to the cinema. To be able to experience this from time to time is a blessing - so a standing ovation from me, thank you.

[jinnxd]

Not only was I just thinking about you and your fic just as you updated it, you also wrote Mizuki in a way that absolutely made me disgusted, it was too perfect. Like spot on with some of the guys that have hit on me and one I ended up dating. Absolutely gross, I loved it! Even though it made my skin crawl. Like fuck Mizuki, Orochimaru can have his body if you ask me. And I can't wait to absolutely melt when you get to the point of actually making Kiya and Kakashi date. Is fanfiction off of fanfiction a thing? Because I can imagine it now: they get together and everything around the same time as team 7 is formed, and then Naruto and Sasuke get assigned to team 7, and they gotta warm up to Kakashi one way or another, and he to them, and it all ends up in the most adorable family picnic. Or family vacation. Where Kakashi and Kiya are trying to have a romantic moment or two that the kids keep ruining because they're trying to have a dumb contest, the kind Kakashi and Guy regularly have. Meanwhile Kiya and Kakashi are working on a way to take down Danzo. And both of the boys end up overhearing that goal but never know the reason why they wanna do that. And also I headcanon sasunaru so Sasuke leaves after the exams anyway, and along the way realizes his feelings for Naruto run deeper and so he returns to his family. And Naruto realizes his feelings after training with Jiraya. Kakashi and Kiya are kinda weirded out but they've seen weirder things so it's fine. And as a family, they take down Danzo. But during the fight Danzo reveals what he wanted to do with Kiya which makes both kids rage so hard they don't even leave a single atom of him remain once he's dead. Is there a plot to this? Absolutely, it's called revenge and happiness because fuck Danzo and I want everyone else to be happy. Anyway sorry for rambling, THANK YOU FOR THE UPDATE, and I love you baiii <3

omg… you were thinking about me?! hehe I’m blushingggg (*´ ˘ `*).｡oO ( ♡ )

I felt horrible writing Mizuki and Kiya’s interactions, but they’re really just all based on past experiences of mine :3 that and I just took every single revolting aspect I could think of and threw them all at him hehehe—self-proclaimed “alpha male”? Check. Constantly interrupts Kiya and refuses to take no for an answer? Check! Negs her at every possible turn? Check, check, check!!!

(AU headcanon: Mizuki is a die-hard Andrew Tate fan)

I feel like we’ve all had shitty experiences with shitty men before (like wtf why are they EVERYWHERE) so this chapter/Mizuki’s WHOLE character is a tribute to all the victims of shitty men (≧o≦) I sincerely hope that the guy you ended up dating did not last long at all, and I hope he got what was coming to him! No one deserves to be treated that way >:(

(but I admit I’m having fun with this—it’s like Mizuki is being put in a public stockade and we all get to throw rotten tomatoes at him :) in a way, it’s nice to see that he’s so widely hated, because WE ALL DESERVE BETTER!!!)

I can’t wait for Kakashi and Kiya to get together, either🤭 there’s been a tiny hint of progress, but there’s still a long way to go until they both stop being idiots and just KISS already 👺

The fanfic of a fanfic is ADORABLE, I love that so much :’) I just want them all to be happy, they deserve so much love <3

And as for the Danzo takedown, there are a million different ideas in my head that are floating around!!! It sort of drives me crazy because everything else has an outline, but Danzo’s demise is just one big question mark🙈 the goal is to have it be a team effort, give everyone a chance to get their revenge, y’know? But then in the meantime Danzo just gets to LIVE until Sasuke’s old enough to beat him up… AHHHH idk idk idk all I know is I want everyone to jump his old mummy-looking ass 😌

RAMBLING IS MY FAV, I LOVE RAMBLING!!! (as we can all tell, I physically cannot shut up… we’re barely halfway through the story and at almost 300k words… oopsie) DONT APOLOGIZE FOR RAMBLING!!!!! Thank *you* for this lovely lovely comment, it was a pleasure to read 🫶🫶🫶

SENDING YOU SO MUCH LOVE!!!! ( •ॢ◡-ॢ)-♡

[doyouknowwhoyouare13]

Nyx reads It's Not Summer Without You

Ok you guys so when I read the first book I read it in a day so that's what I'm gonna TRY to do however, if I don't finish it there might be spaces in between where I sum up everything I read while at school, just a heads up!!

Anyways here's the obligatory warning, DO NOT FEEL LIKE YOU HAVE TO READ THIS!!! It's just for fun but it might get annoying, I promise it won't hurt my feelings 💀

and of course

SPOILER WARNING!!!!

ok before I actually start

I gotta come clean

AT THIS POINT IN TIME.

I am a jeremiah girl

I have been don't even start he's the cutest shut up

anyways

Conrad isn't bad I'm just saying I like Jeremiah better

AND I did hear conrad ain't good in this book so I mean

ok actually chapter one now

so I read the first book last year

so I have no idea what's going on

but I'll figure it out

OK THAT WAS KINDA CUTE

oh right that happened.

omg I know someone named Cory

he'd do the same thing!!!!

this is literally the first chapter wtf

I'm about to cry

chapter 2

omg he called!!!

jeremiah still better

I gotta admit they're cute though

and steven slays per usual

chapter 3!!!

oh I hate Taylor I'm sorry

so annoying ngl

poor Laurel :(

cory seems nice though!!

istg if taylor don't

OMG IT HURTS STOP

chapter 4!!

JEREMIAH???

WAIT WERE THERE POVS IN THE OTHER BOOK?

HOLD ON

GOING TO CHECK

THERE ISN'T

WHAT IS THIS

who cares it's my fav!!!

oh that's sad.

NOO NOOO NOOOOO

HOW COULD YOU??

I'M CRYING NOW TOO

anyways

after I chilled out a bit

chapter 5

stop.

I just stopped crying.

stop it.

ok there the tears go again

you guys, we're only on page 31, chill.

STOP. IT.

"And I've been praying, I never did before"

esny has been in my head this whole chapter it's devastating

NOT BOTH OF THEIR DADS

FUCK THAT SHIT

bro. not mtr rn. I'm already crying.

stop it.

CONRAD???

BELLY. NO WAY.

holy shit that was a fucking rollercoaster I'm still crying omg

alright let's keep going!!!! chapter 6

GONE??

this is actually so sad

I came here for cute summer vibes

not sobbing less than 50 pages in

chapter 7

istfg

i hate this girl

she makes ME crazy istg i actually

UGHH

ok cinderbelly is really cute though

chapter 8

uh oh another pov

BUT JEREMIAH!!!

oh we're going back

good cause then I won't cry

they're so taylor swift coded

oh shit ok I lied

I'm gonna cry wtf

it's ok jeremiah I'll love you for her!!!

I feel bad for him tho ngl

chapter 9

this is so sad wtf

help me please

THE LAST LINE??? I'M GONNA CRY AGAIN BRO

chapter 10

istfg taylor swift is out to get me

fucking

fucking yoyok??

I'm gonna cry

wonder how many times I've said that

bro I'm already almost out of sad tabs what

ok so I read like a lot at school and when I say a lot I mean A LOT like I'm now on chapter 29!!!

anyways still love jere, hate mr. fisher, feel bad for conrad, wonder why her dad and mom broke up but that was prob in the first book

ok we're starting mid 29 (and adding 30)

I'll kiss him for her!!!

also when did they start calling her bells

I mean it's cute but where'd it come from

you're right. you don't have a right 😭

weren't you JUST upset about Conrad?

yeah he doesn't love her cause he loves ME

I'm delusional just go with it!!

NAH NOT ANGIE 💀

how do I remember her but like not half the other stuff help

omg taylor again

I'm sorry I despise her

both of them are driving me insane rn 💀

chapter 31

DECOMPOSING ROSES 💀

reminds me of andrew's spidey "Let's just get out of here" while shaking his head

I love that scene

he's so cute

but anyways back to the book

bro connie getting on my nerves

FORGIVENESS

CAN YOU IMAGINE

oh belly I'm gonna cry

JERE!!!

oooh someone jelly

jelly over belly

LMAO

PROVING MY POINT

JERE>>>

I DON'T UNDERSTAND

IS THERE SOMETHING I'M LIKE MISSING OR WHAT

chapter 33

SHIT I FORGOT HER NAME WAS ISABEL

BELLY.

OMG WHAT

and my words shoot to kill when I'm mad

I have a lot of regrets about that

WOOHOO WE GOT HER!!!

JEREMIAH!!!

chapter 34

ew yellow popsicles

jelly at age 13 bro

AWW HE DID GET SICK BUT BELLS HUNG OUT WITH HIM

chapter 35

STILL JERE!!!

I feel like this is the first time I remember him speaking badly of his dad

I love him sm you have no idea

chapter 36

bro

connie gotta think before he speaks stg 🙄

he likes his bacon like my dad does!!

I like my dad a lot better than mr. fisher though

GO LAUREL!!!

FUCK MR FISHER

um girl

that's your daughter

why are you like

yknow what who cares

chapter 37

JERE!!!!

why is she

ok I got a bone to pick

1

why is she a better parent to the boys than belly

2

WHERE TF IS STEVEN?

oh this is so sad :(

chapter 38

I am officially out of sad tabs

BUT NO WORRIES

FOR I HAVE ANOTHER PACK!!

look at her being a genius

come back...be here!!!

so taylor coded

I'm adding chapter 39 here too

too lazy to add a divider 💀

omg girl shut up about connie jeremiah is right there

I'm calling him connie cause it's funny and I know he would hate it

like matty boy

Chapter 40!!!

OMG BELLY FLOP!!!! WOOHOO

there's my cute summer book

I missed you

SEE JERE IS RIGHT THERE GIRL

slurpees!!

Oh NOW he remembers stuff 🙄

chapter 41

oh jere don't do this to me

scripting out her death cause I can't deal no way

BRO I'M GONNA-

omg good job connie!!

SEE HE REMEMBERS

JERE IS BETTER

COME ON BELLS HOW CAN YOU BE SO PAINFULLY OBLIVIOUS

YES

YESSS

THERE YOU GO JERE THERE YOU GO

WOOHOO!!!!

wish that was me though ✊😔

YESSSSS!!

uh oh connie is back

ngl I'd be mad pissed

CONRAD

I KNOW YOU MAD AND I WOULD BE TOO BUT DAMN

my words shoot to kill when I'm mad!!!

chapter 42

oh my god

bro

you guys gotta talk this shit out ngl

ohhh not steven don't do that to me

CONNIE BRO

bro istfg if you go back to connie I'm gonna cry again

43

this is driving me insane ngl

BELLYYY

NOOO THE END??? WTF YOU MEAN A COUPLE YEARS LATER???

excuse me is she leaving a wedding?

um

bro how am I supposed to wait a year

I'm gonna cry

[ysbnews]

Russia Cannot Stop Attacks on Occupied Crimea 

🎬  War Analysis By Jake Broe   |  8/18/2022    |  ⏱️ 19’58”span / 48K views 

The Ukrainian military this week claimed responsibility for the attack on the airfield near Simferopol in Crimea. 

Russia has no response for any of these attacks.  Russia keeps making errors that are costing the lives of their leadership and propagandists. 

Watch Jake Broe on YouTube  ▶️  https://youtu.be/5o1_NkcRgiY 

Comment By Blake C.:  I always rush to watch these update videos when you put them out, this war has been very fascinating to watch. Great stuff, and glory to Ukraine! 🇺🇦

Adrian's Channel:  More good news for Ukraine! It's about time the Russians in occupied Crimea feel the fear of not being safe. I am happy that they are all going home to mother Russia!

Yoko F:  I feel that these airmen are loading their love, respect, prayers and all the positive energy as well. Glory to all heroes who fight for freedom🌹Slava Ukraini 🇺🇦 

Ajit Advani:  Great content as usual. Greetings from India. Loved the loading of ammo clip. Imagine the logistics of loading, flying the consignments accross continents to Poland and then getting accross to the frontlines. Only the US can do such fantastic stuff. 

Nancy Ruiz Perez:  I love how you show the values and humanity of all these people contributing for Ukraine success!

Robin Stevenson:  Jake, I love the way you put a human touch into these videos and do your best to stay upbeat.  Your videos are informative and also lift my spirits about the situation. 

Andrew Ackerley:  Thank you America. Great video Jake. You are doing a stirling job to help Ukraine win this crazy war against Putin. Sláva Ukraini! 🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦

Anne Austin:  The very existence of a "436th Aerial Port Squadron" in the US armed forces just really drives home how massively powerful the US is militarily. 😳 As a UK person, I'm damned glad we're on the same side.

Rob Whitney:  I think we all agree Russia can’t hold extended lines, they can flatten certain areas but their lack of training, lack of professionalism and and WWII tactics won’t work 😎

harmless:  For once I have to agree with Putler: Russian weapons have been tested in battle — and found to be severely lacking. :P

Kathryn Robertson:  Thanks for a great update, as usual! It always makes my day when I see one of your notifications come through because I know we will get the truth from you without the hype! Praying the Ukrainians get their country back and the aggressors get exactly what they deserve! Fingers crossed for every bit of good news now, as winter approaches. Stay Gold!

Chet Pomeroy:  Your videos are VERY informative, Jake. I'm surprised the locals in that Ukrainian city didn't anchor those Czech hedgehogs into the pavement. That's what the East Germans did in the death strip on the east side of the Berlin wall, especially by Potsdamer Platz. 

terrysky83:  Jake, I adore a piece of russian bad news as much as you do.  Those orcs just can't help but show how hideously incompetent they are.

Christiane069:  Jake, Thank you for the Russian movie. This Ukrainian film maker is so modern for his time. It is amazing that the Stalin gestapo did not distrioed it as it was filmed during a very repressive period in Russia's history. What's new there, nothing change.

Comment By Antonio Grancino:  Jake's site is a gold mine of fair and accurate information about the "special operation" in Ukraine.  Keep up the good work !

Watch Jake Broe on YouTube  ▶️  https://youtu.be/5o1_NkcRgiY 

[dotthings]

Let’s talk about why Dean dancing with a lamp is subtext, but it’s subtext that supports textual arcs. Dean dancing with a lamp is not random. Meta on why Dean dancing with a lamp is part of the build of a textual arc for Dean, thematically, which also connects to his relationship with Cas. This symbolic moment being tacitly about Destiel will only feel like reaching if you ignore context, ignore canon, ignore long arcing, ignore textual material surrounding it. This isn’t just me talking about a ship, this is an important arc for Dean himself emotionally and the way canon’s working, Cas has become the star player in this specific emotional Dean arc about yearning. 

Here are some canon quotes. I could just leave these here and not write another word of meta because the canon wrote it for me. But I’ve added some further commentary to spell out clearly what I’m getting at.

Dean in 8.14 “Trial and Error” by Andrew Dabb:

“You see a light at the end of this ugly-ass tunnel. I don't. But I tell you what I do know – it's that I'm gonna die with a gun in my hand. 'Cause that's what I have waiting for me – that's all I have waiting for me. I want you to get out. I want you to have a life – become a man of Letters, whatever. You, with a wife and kids and – and – and grandkids, living till you're fat and bald and chugging Viagra – that is my perfect ending, and it's the only one that I'm gonna get.”

Dean in 10.16 “Paint it Black” by Eugenie Ross-Lemming and Brad Buckner:

“You know, the life I live, the work I do…I pretty much just figured that that was all there was to me, you know? Tear around and jam the key in the ignition and haul ass until I ran out of gas. I guess I just thought sooner or later, I’d go out the same way that I live – pedal to the metal, and that would be it....Now, um… recent events, uh… make me think I might be closer to that than I really thought. And…I don’t know. I mean, you know, there’s – there’s things, there’s…people, feelings that I-I-I want to experience differently than I have before, or maybe even for the first time.”

Sam and Dean in 11.04 “Baby” by Robbie Thompson:

SAM: Really? You don't . . . Ever want something more? DEAN: I'm sorry, have you met us? We're batting a whopping zero in domestic life, man. Goose eggs. SAM: You don't ever think about something? Not marriage or whatever. But . . . Something? You know, with a hunter? Somebody who understands the life?

Sam and Dean in 13.23 “Let the Good Times Roll” by Andrew Dabb:

DEAN: But on a beach somewhere, you know? Can you imagine? You, me, Cas, toes in the sand, couple of them little umbrella drinks. Matching Hawaiian shirts, obviously. Some hula girls. SAM: You talking about retiring? You? DEAN: If I knew the world was safe? Hell, yeah. And you know why? 'Cause we freaking earned it, man.

Sam and Dean in 15.08 “Our Father, Who Aren’t in Heaven” by Eugenie Ross-Lemming and Brad Buckner:

DEAN: Look, man, I didn't want to say anything, okay, 'cause I was kind of in in a bad place, and, uh, yeah, I didn't want to jinx it or whatever, but, you know, I tried the family thing, right? SAM: Yeah, me too. And that's not for us. DEAN: No, not really. But I'm just saying if it was to work, Eileen, you know, she gets it. She gets us. She gets the life. She's hot. SAM: Dean. I mean, I'm not even- DEAN: Look, all I'm saying is you- you could do worse, okay? And she could certainly do better. Like, so much better. I'm happy for you, Sammy.

Dean and Garth in 15.10 “The  Heroes’ Journey” written by Andrew Dabb:

DEAN: You know, I gotta say, aside from pincushion in there… this is pretty nice. GARTH: Yeah, better than I ever thought I'd get. I mean, hunting -- I figured I'd be dead before I'm 40. You know, go out young and pretty. But now I've got a great wife, great kids. I guess...sometimes things work out.

Dean in 15.10 “The Heroes’ Journey” by Andrew Dabb:

Dean, wistful, watching through the window as Garth and Bess dance: You know, I always thought I could be a good dancer if I wanted to be.

Ok, let those roll around in your brain for moment. 

Now: CONTEXT. CONTEXT. CONTEXT.

There’s this long running arc about maybe Sam and Dean could each find a significant other, not white picket fence, but...something, with someone already in the life, who gets their life. There’s Dean’s move from despairing and believing the only ending he could have, the only ending any hunter could have, is dying with a gun in hand, to Dean’s enthusiasm for the concept of retirement, Dean’s wistfulness about finding a significant other, for what he thinks he can’t have, and he starts the cycle all over again, if he can’t have it, then he wants Sam to have it, so Dean encourages Sam with Eileen. Saileen, the Dean-blessed, Dean-approved Sam ship. Dean ships it. And that is how the canon is trending, complete with Sam and Eileen kissing goodbye and saying “this is real” and even God himself saying their feelings were real, “that was all you,” even if God manipulated events around them. Which is an overt mirror to Dean and Cas and Dean’s expressly stated doubts about what’s real and what isn’t, and Cas telling Dean “we are.” 

Much the way Sam has been witness to Destiel, and has often pointed out Dean’s Cas feelings. Dean’s got a front row seat to Saileen and approves; Sam’s had a front row seat to Destiel and approves. 

Let’s throw in Robert Berens’ work in The Trap here, since that’s relevant to this specific topic as well, because why did Sam and Dean in the potential future timeline where they’d killed Chuck give up and cave in to their vampire instincts? The world being overwhelmed with monsters...and losing Eileen and losing Cas. It’s right there in the dialogue. I’ll give you the quote and everything:

Sam and Dean in 15.09 “The Trap” by Robert Berens:

SAM: You want to quit? What's happened to you, Dean? Ever since -- DEAN: Ever since what? We lost pretty much everyone we've ever cared about? Ever since the Mark made Cas go crazy? Ever since I had to bury him in a Ma'lak box? Ever since then? Yeah. You know why? 'Cause the monsters -- they're everywhere. Everywhere! What we do -- it's not even Hunting anymore. It's whack-a-mole. We don't even save people. Every friend we've ever had is either dead, or they got wise and they packed it in. SAM: Jody's still fighting, and Bobby -- DEAN: Bobby has a death wish, and you know it. And Jody -- ever since what happened to Donna and the girls, she does, too. And after Eileen... so do you.

“Ever since” Dean had to bury Cas in a Ma’lak box. “After Eileen...so do you.” 

So there’s this canonical long, long thread across multiple authors (and those weren’t even all the quotes, I’m sure people could dig up more) about Dean in particular yearning towards finding a significant other, some contentment, with someone who already is in the hunting life, who gets it, who understands.  

An episode that flat out shows how losing their significant others is the final straw that rips out Sam and Dean’s last will to fight, and they lose themselves, and after they’re turned into vampires, they just...give into the darkness. Where Sam gives up their shot at destroying the big bad because losing everyone they love is too high a cost. Where losing Cas makes Dean lose hope, where losing Eileen sends Sam into a death wish mindset. Sam and Dean don’t just need each other. That’s not canon, it never has been.

And then right after that, along comes meta episode The Heroes’ Journey. Sorry if you don’t like The Heroes’ Journey, but it’s what the canon did, it’s textual, along with everything else I’ve pointed out here, and in among the crackish humor are some real emotional narrative points. 

In The Heroes’ Journey, Dean gets to see Garth’s life. Garth found his significant other, Bess, and she’s another werewolf. Now, Garth’s life resembles the traditional white picket fence idea a lot more than what Team Free Will are headed for. Garth has a big house with a porch, and he’s a dentist. He’s also a werewolf and his wife is a werewolf and his kids are werewolves because Bess is a pureblood werewolf, Garth didn’t exactly leave the life, and he helps Sam and Dean on a case. But nothing’s been indicating to me that anyone in Team Free Will is headed for that kind of settling down, with a house, becoming a dentist. However, the canon has been practically shouting now, as we near final episodes of SPN, to make the point about a desirable outcome--some kind of stability, contentment, and a significant other. Dean gets a front row seat to seeing a hunter can have that. Garth’s a hunter who turned into a werewolf and he can have that. 

When EP’s talk about how they aren’t headed for a white picket fence or driving off into the sunset or settling down, none of that rules out them finding...something...with someone, and some form of stability and contentment.  Nope, I can’t really imagine them in the suburbs becoming dentists. But canon sure is putting up big neon arrows to...something. Think outside the box. This isn’t about the white picket fence. 

And in The Heroes’ Journey, Dean, conked out on the good gas so Garth can fix his teeth, has a trippy dream where he dances with a lamp.

Rewatch the ep. Look at how the dance is choreographed not just the use of light, because that’s a clue too. The whole dance could have been Dean and Garth being dancing bros, but Garth fades off the stage, and Dean dances alone...until he grabs the standing lamp. In a season where Dean and Cas’s relationship is an A-plot, define it how you like, it’s A-plot. Their breakup and their reconciliation, which played like a marital breakup and reconciliation, are tied to major mytharc beats. In a season where a long-running textual theme about Dean’s developing hope for retirement and his wistfulness about “things...people...feelings...” is getting further play. Where Dean and Cas’s relationship continues to be one of the show’s most central ones.

Dean dances with a lamp. While his emotionally fraught, intense close relationship with Cas--A BEING MADE OF LIGHT--has a long-running arc and recently more and more textual level content spelling out the sublimated romantic interest in small words, while there’s an arc about Dean’s yearning for that stability, contentment, a significant other.

CONTEXT. 

We don’t think Destiel’s “going canon” because Dean dances with a lamp, it’s that Dean dancing with a lamp is kinda loud serving as reflection of canon textual arcing. Sometimes subtext adds a layer. Sometimes subtext is directly tied to the surface layers, an echo, a highlighter.

I’ll just be over here, crying because Dean danced with a lamp.

[leia-imogen]

✨just twinyard things✨

the road to a healthy, loving relationship is long one, but it is one they're both willing to take together, and eventually, they do like actual sibling shit and it drives everyone crazy

arguing about who is the older twin. eventually they check some medical records (??) and find out that andrew is older by 19 minutes he never lets aaron hear the end of it

“respect your elders” “by 19 minutes!” “best 19 minutes of my life”

“see, aaron, my little brother-” “oh go fuck yourself”

coordinating halloween outfits!! like the twins in the shining

i just watched cat in the hat and honestly just imagine aaron insisting on being called chocolate thunda instead of thing 2 and anyways that is now his permanent contact name in nicky's phone

they dress up as each other to mess with the other foxes way too often. like they'll wear the same things and get rid of any distinctive scents ( cigarette smoke, lush body sprays that aaron totally uses ) and try their very hardest to maintain the same facial expressions

and only neil and kevin and nicky can tell them apart

once they try dressing up as each other; neil doesn't even mention it and just pretends nothing happened. kevin takes one look at andrew in aarons clothes and rolls his eyes but doesn't point it out bcs the other foxes are completely fooled. nicky can tell something's off and figures it out when they start talking

( they stop doing that after they graduate tho, bcs aaron's no longer playing exy and grows his hair out a bit longer )

and i'm just,, thinking of the twins being separated at birth,, neither of them can even remember the other but there's always this awful, indescribable feeling of missing something, this horrible feeling of loneliness that only goes away after months and months of therapy bcs they're together again and they aren't what they could've been but they're them and they've found each other after 20 years and a billion obstacles and that's enough

wow okay now i'm emo and i fucking hate tilda minyard so much

MOVING ON

andrew the eidetic memory bitch can hold a grudge like hades, especially for his baby brother

“why do you keep trying to knock that striker down??” “he slammed you into the plexiglass once” “wait when” “two years ago” “wha-”

we all know andrew loves desserts and sugary things and basically everything that edges poor kevin closer to cardiac arrest. but he can't bake for shit and neither can his doting boyfriend

nicky can COOK and neil can,, make food?? it's edible but it doesn't taste good

so aaron learns how to bake for his semi-psycho knife-wielding twin brother with a sweet tooth that can kill, as you do

it takes a bit of experimentation, and a lot of nicky coming in while he's busy making something and getting into a food fight with him, but he becomes surprisingly good at it!

cookies, cupcakes, pie. mug cakes for nightmare nights, which andrew can make too. he bakes a whole-ass chocolate cake for their birthday!

also i give you: emotional support stuffed animals

aaron gets a stuffed tiger the size of his tiny torso from nicky the first time they met when aaron was 2, and nicky was 5 and wondering why his baby cousin's skin was covered with red pinch marks

it's almost 23 years later when he reveals he's kept it the entire time, on the birthday that he shares with his brother, when he gives him an exact copy that he got from god-knows-where

nicky cries

if anyone has any requests, my ask box is always open and i'm always bored!

[softtdaisy]

I love romance books and thought about popular tropes. Which scenario is more possible for Andrew and Ben:

- from friends to lovers

- love from first sight

- fake dating

?

Maybe you have other propositions!

I love romance tropes so much 👀 some that I also like are ennemis to lovers, roommate, best friend’s brother…but im gonna use the ones you said!

I picture Andrew with a perfect friends to lover, can you just imagine how sweet he would be?? One day he will stating to notice how he loves you more than he pretends and he will try to act normal but it’s Andrew so of course he can help being more affectionate. He will try to save your friendship but love is too strong. It’s like your soulmates and I love this.

For Ben I want a fake dating story. It would be so good!! I’m sure Ben would be perfect for this because he would do more than he’s supposed to like kissing you more, touching your thighs when you’re sitting next to each other. He will try to drive you crazy yes. And what I love is that we don’t really know how Ben acts in a relationship since he’s never been really public with someone but I’m sure he will be extremely flirty. Just the way his hand would slowly go from your back to your lower back in the most natural way. I’m this close to write this 😭

If you guys see them with other tropes please tell me I love these!!

[terrainofheartfelt]

"It's been more like a 'Choose Your Own Adventure'!" A Rufly Playlist

Finally, a use for my Dad(™) music taste! I threw in a few live recordings/rough sessions because that’s rock and roll, babey. YouTube link here

image sources: (x) (x) (x)

American Girl - Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers

If you think this isn’t a rufly song, then idk what to tell you.

And for one desperate moment there / He crept back in her memory / God, it's so painful when something that is so close / Is still so far out of reach

Light My Fire - The Doors

Making this playlist was fun because I got to imagine a lot of precanon Rufus/Lily, and how they came to be. And like, I can see Rufus covering a LOT of these, yk?

The time to hesitate is through / No time to wallow in the mire

Funny Feelin’ - Langhorne Slim

I can also see Rufus actually writing some of these. Like this one!

Well, I got my eye on you, baby / And I know I ain't the only one / But if you just say maybe / My lonely days would be done

Superstar - tswift

If you don’t project onto at least one tswift song can you even call it a ship playlist?

And I knew from the first note played / I'd be breaking all my rules to see you / You smile that beautiful smile and all the girls in the front row / Scream your name

Lay, Lady, Lay - Bob Dylan

Tour life vibes

His clothes are dirty but his, his hands are clean / And you’re the best thing that he’s ever seen

Fire - Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band

Your kisses they burn / But your heart stays cool

Fooled Around and Fell in Love - as performed by Morgan James

Because Lily Rhodes really did fuck around and find out.

Free, on my own is the way I used to be / Ah, but since I met you baby, love's got a hold on me

Don’t Let Me Down - The Beatles

Nothing says Lily & Rufus like a Beatles deep cut.

I'm in love for the first time / Don't you know it's gonna last

Shadows of the Night - Pat Benatar

80s rock vibes, babe!

You can cry tough baby, it's all right / You can let me down easy, but not tonight

She - as performed by She & Him

She may be the love that cannot hope to last / May come to me from shadows of the past

Can’t Buy Me Love - The Beatles

Tell me that you want the kind of things / That money just can't buy / I don't care too much for money / Money can't buy me love

Second Hand News - Fleetwood Mac

It’s breakup chapter time, y’all

I know there's nothing to say / Someone has taken my place

Hungry Heart - Bruce Springsteen

I met her in a Kingstown bar / We fell in love I knew it had to end / We took what we had and we ripped it apart / Now here I am down in Kingstown again

Piece of My Heart - as performed by Big Brother and the Holding Company

Have another little piece of my heart now, baby / Well, you know you got it, child, if it makes you feel good

Love Really Hurts Without You - Billy Ocean

In my head, this is the “Lily and her cavalcade of failed relationships post-Rufus” montage song

You walk like a dream and you make like you're queen of the action

Halls - Andrew McMahon in the Wilderness

This is the “Rufus touring post-Lily” montage song

Thought a broken heart could write a perfect song / And it did and I was right so now you're gone

Mulholland Drive - The Gaslight Anthem

Okay so we all know about the Dair & Rufly parallels, and this song nearly ended up on that playlist, but the vibe didn’t quite fit. And I think, in my heart of hearts, that this song (though probs more punk than Lincoln Hawk sounds) reads like Rufus could have written it. And there are lines that are so evocative of both Dair & Rufly like I still remember holding you, just out of sight of her - like! That’s Valentine’s day 2012 amirite??? And: But it scared you, love, to need someone, so you killed it all instead. And the imagery of Mulholland Drive with Lily being from LA...Anyways this song is one of my all time favorites.

Would you miss me if I was gone and all the simple things were lost? / Would you ever wait on me to say / Oh that I’d just die if you ever took your love away

Malibu 1922 - COIN

You're some old man's new trophy / Locked up in some house in New Jersey / Now money's not a problem / But 20 years it seems you've forgotten

How’s the World Treating You - Elvis Presley

Pilot Rufly vibes, but sad!

Every sweet thing that mattered / Has been broken in two / And I'm asking you, darling / How's the world treating you?

Even Cowgirls Get the Blues - The Gaslight Anthem

Pilot Rufly vibes, but sexy!

Can I get a witness, pretty baby? / I still love Tom Petty songs and drivin' old men crazy

It Ain’t Me Babe - Bob Dylan

“You made a choice to be Lily Bass, and we both need you to go do that.”

Go lightly from the ledge, babe / Go lightly on the ground / I’m not the one you want, babe / I will only let you down

Harvest Moon - Neil Young

It’s about the lovers to strangers to hostile acquaintances to friends to lovers again.

When we were strangers / I watched you from afar / When we were lovers / I loved you with all my heart

Home From Home - Roo Panes

“Well, it’s Thanksgiving, and I couldn’t think of another place that felt more like home.”

Because I'm starting to realise the question worth asking is, who? / I'm starting to realize the question worth answering is you

You Got Lucky - Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers

I mean. I mean they do fight a lot.

If you don't feel complete / If I don't take you all the way / Then go

Are We Free? - Mick Flannery and Susan O’Neill

I like how this whole song is a dialogue, but always comes together at the chorus

Are we free to understand / or bound to repeat again / all the wars of before?

The Bones feat. Hozier - Maren Morris

“The king and queen of reconciliation” - Dan Humphrey

No, it won't always go the way we planned it / But the wolves came and went and we're still standing

Songbird - Fleetwood Mac

They didn’t break up, what are you talking about?

And I love you, I love you, I love you / Like never before

Beginning to Feel the Years - Brandi Carlile

And I'm beginning to feel the years / But I'm going to be okay / As long as you're beside me--along the way

Call on Me - Big Brother and the Holding Company

Baby, when you're down and feel so blue / Well, no, you won't drown, honey, I'll be there too

Lily - Benjamin Gibbard

It was too perfect. I had no choice.

Lily is a big brass band who fills the air with song / Lily is a destination and she's where my arms belong

Hard Feelings - Brian Fallon

And the time used to stop in her hands / I could feel it go hesitant / When it rained in Manhattan / We took shelter in the spare room at the Grand

[buriedinbaltimore]

Imagine the foxes playing two truths and a lie...

The upperclassmen start playing it as a drinking game one night and Neil is intrigued. Andrew is also intrigued but doesn’t show it and refuses to play.

They are all already pretty tipsy, with Kevin, Matt, Nicky, and Aaron pretty much drunk.

Allison goes first, she has an amazing poker face and calmly says all three statements with no facial twitches or vocal cues. “my first car was a Toyota Camry (truth), my prom dress cost over $10k (lie), and I once made out with Miley Cyrus (truth)”

Renee, Neil, and Aaron guess right, Matt, Dan, Kevin, and Nicky have to drink.

Then it’s Matt’s turn and he is terrible, he starts snickering before he opens his mouth. “I’ve swam with sharks (truth)” he says, but he cannot control his face and it keeps contorting as he tries to maintain a neutral expression. He takes a deep breath to try and control his giggles, “my favorite flower is sunflowers (truth)” then he can’t hold it in anymore and starts hysterically laughing and chokes out, “My favorite city in the world is Newark, NJ (lie)”

Everyone gets it right and Matt has to drink.

Dan is next, she goes for the “one of these is so out there and crazy it can’t be a lie...or is it?” method.

((It is.))

“I’ve never shot a gun (truth), as a kid my favorite food was celery with ranch dressing (truth), and when I was 18 I won the lottery but the ticket was ruined and I couldn’t claim the money (lie)”

Aaron jumps in with “Obviously you never won the lottery, how would you even know if the ticket was destroyed”

Dan has her story ready. “When I first turned 18, I played the same numbers every week. It went on for a few months when my numbers were picked, but by that point playing was more of a habit than anything else and I wasn’t too careful with my tickets. I searched for it everywhere and found that I left it in my jeans pocket when I did my laundry.”

Allison asks what the numbers were, and Dan answers with no hesitation, which makes Allison tilt her head and stare into Dan’s eyes. Dan looks back without guile, totally relaxed.

Nicky is looking at her with his eyes wide and mouth slightly open and asks how much money she would have won

When Dan answers $53 million dollars Nicky gasps and Matt groans.

Neil, Renee, and Allison get it right, but everyone else falls for it.

When its Nicky turn he forgets to say a lie.

He is sitting there trying to come up with something for what feels like forever while every goads him for taking so long.

Finally, after waiting 5 minutes, Kevin says “I’m going because Nicky obviously can’t come up with anything” and Nicky jumps across Kevins lap and goes “No no no no no, I’ve got it!”

Without moving off Kevin he says “I’m allergic to shellfish, I died my hair green once, and I’ve read all the twilight books three times“ He moves back to his spot looking pleased with himself.

Everyone starts discussing theories until Andrew says in his bored, flat voice, “Nicky, those are all true”

Nicky starts to protest, thinks for a second, then just says “Fuck!” and takes a shot.

Kevin rolls his eyes so hard that his entire head rotates then says, while slightly slurring, “Okay, my turn! I’ve played a game of pick up basketball once (lie), I know all the lyrics to We Didn’t Start the Fire (truth), and I’ve traveled to over a dozen countries (truth).”

Matt starts hysterically laughing again, “You know all the lyrics to We Didn’t Start the Fire! oh my god Kevin you are such a nerd!” everyone else starts laughing at Kevin too.

“Maybe I do, maybe it’s the lie!”

“Everyone knows you’ve never played a sport besides Exy in your life Kevin” Dan says, “Will you sing it for us? Please, please, please!”

Allison, Nicky, and Matt join Dan in asking Kevin to sing. Renee even says, “It would be lovely to hear you sing it Kevin” to which Kevin blushes a little and answers, “Maybe later” and then takes his shot.

Aaron is drunk enough at this point to spill some truths he otherwise never would, and will wish for the rest of his life that he never had.

“When I was little, I wanted to be a figure skater when I grew up.(truth)”

Everyone goes completely silent and stares at him unsure whether to laugh or not but he doesn’t realize and continues

“The first time I got high I thought the squirrels in the tree wanted to adopt me as their squirrel king (truth), and I hate Taylor Swift (lie)”

No one says anything at first, and just when Aaron starts to realize something is up, Nicky says “Nah man, you LOVE T. Swift, you can’t deny it!”

They collectively make a silent agreement to ignore this new information about Aaron until he sobers up a bit and can either defend himself, or will be more fun to tease.

In the end, everyone but Renee guesses right, but she guessed wrong on purpose because she didn’t think that Aaron should be having any more to drink.

When it’s Renee’s turn, she smiles sweetly and says, ”I can juggle up to 7 balls (truth), I have never drank diet soda (lie), and I once had a pet turtle named Vincent (truth).”

No one is confident about which is the lie and it is the longest the foxes debate after anyones turn. It doesn’t help that Renee refuses to answer questions, and whenever someone tries to ask her anything she just smiles and shrugs.

It comes out to Neil and Aaron getting it right, while everyone else has to drink.

“How the fuck has it never come up that you’re a master juggler?” Allison asks angrily

“It wouldn’t be appropriate to do it at practice, and we’re not really around balls much otherwise.”

Everyone asks for a demonstration, “I will juggle later if Kevin will sing.”

Everyone looks at Kevin who sighs but says “Okay, fine!”

They all cheer then wait eagerly for Neil to go.

Neil sits quietly for a little while, not as long as Nicky, but long enough that Aaron says, “Come on this should be easy for you! You lied to us all for a year, what’s the problem, the truth?”

Neil shoots him a dirty look but doesn’t respond for a few more seconds then says,

“My mom and I once helped deliver a baby at a truck stop in Alberta, I’ve been bitten by a camel, and I can speak 7 languages”

Everyone just stares at him.

“Two of those things are true?” Matt finally asks

“Yeah.” Neil says, shrugging. Everyone is silent again.

Nicky turns to Andrew for help, but he refuses to say anything. His eyes are bright with interest though and he looks at Neil for a long time. Internally, he thinks the one about helping birth a baby has something off about it.

After much debate, Allison, Kevin, and Matt guess the baby, Renee, Dan, and Aaron guess the camel, and Nicky says the languages, “No one can know SEVEN languages!! I won’t believe it!”

They all turn to Neil expectantly and he says, “It was the first one, we were just outside Vancouver, in British Columbia, not Alberta.”

“But you, Neil Josten, have helped deliver a baby?” Allison asks incredulously.

“Technically I wasn’t Neil Josten yet…”

Everyone groans. Everyone takes a shot.

Cut to 15 minutes later, Renee is juggling an exy ball, some apples, and Matt’s phone while Kevin sings. Nicky tries to sing along with Kevin but definitely doesn’t know the right words, Aaron is watching Renee wide eyed, Dan and Matt are playing air guitar behind Kevin, and Allison is looking for more things for Renee to juggle. Neil and Andrew sit quietly on a desk holding cigarettes, observing their idiot friends.  

Stories Behind the Truths and Lies

Allison

My first car was a Toyota Camry (truth) - Allison’s parents wanted her to learn how to drive in a safe car that wouldn’t draw a lot of attention, so they got her a Camry. She only drove it for 3 weeks before demanding an upgrade.

My prom dress cost over $10k (lie) - This was almost true. She had ordered a custom Zac Posen dress but before it was finalized she made her decision to go to PSU and play Exy, and her mother canceled the order. She ended up wearing something she found in a vintage store that she altered herself. She ended up enjoying it a lot, which led to her decision to study fashion. (In my hc she played professional Exy for 3? seasons but was injured and then started her fashion line.)

I once made out with Miley Cyrus (truth) - While out clubbing one night she met Miley through mutual friends, they were attracted to each other, they made out. Miley asked for her number but Allison wasn’t looking for anything more than a hook up.

Matt

I’ve swam with sharks (truth) - He did this with his mom on a vacation and they both loved it. They also have a tradition where they watch at least one night of shark week together, or at least call each other to talk while they are both watching.

My favorite flower is sunflowers (truth) - No story lol I just think he would like sunflowers.

My favorite city in the world is Newark, NJ (lie) - I love thinking about New Yorker Matt. Raised on the Upper East Side, dad a top plastic surgeon, mom a public figure? Child grew up surrounded by serious privilege. HC that in fifth grade he made friends with a boy who was on scholarship at his school. Let’s call him… Metin. He lived in Queens? He took the subway? Matt goes to his house one day and it is 1/8th the size of his apartment and there are 9 people living there; Metin’s parents, two grandparents, his uncle, his two sisters, and his cousin. They all speak Turkish in the house and it’s loud and crowded but so full of life and love and Matt loves it. He and Metin grew apart when Matt started using, but before that they were best friends for years and explored the city together, Matt learning about and experiencing so much culture that for the first 9 years of his life he didn’t know existed. When Nicky wanted to go to Times Square for New Years Matt knew he had to be a good host and take them but inside he was DYING. I’m getting off track. No New Yorker could ever like Newark. I’m not convinced anybody could like Newark. It is indeed, very laughable.

Dan

I’ve never shot a gun (truth) - Dan hates guns and refuses to shoot one.

As a kid my favorite food was celery with ranch dressing (truth) - Idk I just thought this was cute. And also thinking about young Dan who didn’t have a lot of access to healthy foods getting celery sticks and ranch with her free school lunch and getting SO excited. Trading her cookie to a classmate for their celery.

When I was 18 I won the lottery but the ticket was ruined and I couldn’t claim the money (lie) - I like to think this is part true. After Dan turned 18 but before she was recruited for the Foxes, she played lotto a lot, always with the same numbers that she got from a fortune cookie that said, “Failure is not defeat until you stop trying.” She stopped playing once she signed with Wymack.

Nicky (all truths)

I’m allergic to shellfish - Mostly I love that Andrew knew all these things about Nicky, especially his allergy because he’s always looking out to make sure Nicky doesn’t eat something he can’t.

I died my hair green once - At first, when he took custody of the twins and started showing up for them at school at stuff, he hated the looks he got. He was a 19 year old kid who was supposed to be their guardian? Not to mention the way people eyed his skin and hair when he said he was family. One day he decided to dye his hair blond and he asked Andrew and Aaron to help, to try to bond. Aaron wanted nothing to do with it, but surprisingly, Andrew seem enthusiastic about the idea. He bought the dye and did everything for Nicky in the kitchen. When he was finally done roughly washing the dye out of Nicky’s hair, Nicky went to the bathroom to see how he looked and saw that Andrew had died his hair green. He wasn’t sure if he wanted to laugh at the prank or cry because he foolishly thought he might be getting through to Andrew. When he went back to the kitchen, he tried to laugh it off and said maybe he should go to a salon to get the color right. Andrew told him he was stupid to try and change how he looked just because people were dumb enough to think that families needed to look alike. Besides, they weren’t a family anyway.  “Family” is a toxic excuse for things people put up with, a reason we accept the tragedies and inconveniences forced upon us. (Nora’s words) Nicky was upset, and dyed his hair back to his natural color once the roots started growing in, but he reaffirmed his commitment in that moment that he would show the twins what Erik had shown him, what a family could really be.

I’ve read all the twilight books three times - Nicky was a huge fan of twilight, even going to the midnight release party for the last book. He was disappointed in the movie adaptations but loved the casting and watched for the eye candy. He is loving the twilight renaissance especially the twilight is gay discourse.

Kevin

I’ve played a game of pick up basketball once (lie) - Kevin has never played a game of basketball, or soccer, or tennis, or baseball, or any other sport for that matter and can not understand why anyone would want to.

I know all the lyrics to We Didn’t Start the Fire (truth) - Kayleigh Day was a big music fan, she loved everything from classical to country, but one of her favorite artists was Billy Joel. After she died and Kevin moved into Evermore, he almost forgot about her music because the music at the Nest was all chosen for pragmatic reasons, like its BPM and ability to pump the players up. One day, when Kevin was around 15 years old, a rebellious Raven played his own music while training in the weight room. He and his partner were the only ones in there until Riko and Kevin showed up, and they turned it off as soon as they realized they had come in, but Kevin heard some of “Only the Good Die Young” and for the first time in a long time had a vivid memory of his mother. He asked the boys what had been playing, and Riko scoffed at the name Billy Joel. That night while Riko was sleeping, Kevin downloaded Billy Joel’s Greatest Hits and listened until he feel asleep, and he continued listening to it for weeks until he started remembering more of his mothers songs from his childhood. We Didn’t Start the Fire was one of his favorites because history.

I’ve traveled to over a dozen countries (truth) - Between travel through Europe with his mom while she spread Exy and professional appearances he made with Riko, Kevin is the most well traveled besides Neil.

Aaron

When I was little, I wanted to be a figure skater when I grew up. (truth) - When Aaron was around four or five, he watched the winter olympics on TV and fell in love with figure skating. Tilda never bothered to get him skating lessons, but one day, when Aaron was seven, there was an attempt to revive the Ice Capades. Aaron never thought he would get to go, but Tilda surprised him with tickets. It is one of the few really good memories he has of his mom.

The first time I got high I thought the squirrels in the tree wanted to adopt me as their squirrel king (truth) - I just imagine Aaron trying his mom’s drugs for the first time alone in the back yard, laying flat on his back looking up at a family of squirrels, saying, “I’m king of the squirrels!!!”

I hate Taylor Swift (lie) - Katelyn is a HUGE Taylor Swift fan. When they first started hanging out, Aaron didn’t really like her music but didn’t want to say anything. Eventually he started associating her with Katelyn though, and he loves watching Katelyn sign and dance so much that he now genuinely enjoys her music.

Renee

I can juggle up to 7 balls (truth) - Renee always had a natural juggling talent. She never really tried to learn, it was just always something she could do.

I have never drank diet soda (lie) - She does prefer non-diet soda, but she has tried diet before.

I once had a pet turtle named Vincent (truth) - Vincent was a gift from one of her mother’s boyfriends, the only one Renee ever remotely like. He was horrible to her mother, but had a soft spot for Renee and treated her kindly. They broke up after a couple of months, and he gave her Vincent as a parting gift. She had him until she got arrested, she couldn’t go back home to get him and when her mother went to prison he died.

Neil

My mom and I once helped deliver a baby at a truck stop in Alberta (lie) - This happened while Neil and his mom were on the way to Seattle. It was the middle of the night and they stopped to get gas a few hours out from Vancouver when they heard a woman screaming. There was nothing around for miles and only one other car in the lot that had been there when they pulled in. His mother immediately dropped the gas pump and Neil was already back in the car when the screaming stopped and his mother hesitated. Neil had never seen his mom hesitate with a potential threat around before, and he listened closely to try and understand why she stopped. All he heard was a woman panting harshly, but it sounded almost as though there was a rhythm to it. Mary signaled for him to get out of the car, and ordered him to grab some blankets, the first aid kit, and water bottles and follow her. They walked behind the locked public bathrooms, and found the woman squatting, with tears running down her face. Mary wasn’t very gentle or comforting, but she told the woman in a calm and confident voice that they were going to help. Neil didn’t do much, but he let the woman hold his hand and squeeze until he thought she would break it. He gave her sips of water between her contractions and did anything else his mother said. Once the baby was out, wrapped in a blanket, and in its mothers arms, Mary grabbed Neil and they left without another word to the woman. She stared after them, confused and grateful. Neil and his mother never spoke of it again.

I’ve been bitten by a camel (truth) - Neil and Mary spent a few days in Dubai to get some papers from a specialist there before traveling back to North America. The man did his business out of a racetrack where they held camel races. To get to his office, they had to travel through the back part of the track that the jockeys used to get the camels into position. Neil got too close to one of the camels and it bit his arm, luckily (or not), the jockey was in the middle of beating it and before it closed its mouth too tightly, landed a blow that caused the camel to immediately open its mouth again. Once he was freed, Neil was out of reach in a millisecond.

I can speak 7 languages (truth) - English, German, French, Russian, Hebrew, Czech, Greek. (To clarify he can speak 7 languages but he wouldn’t necessarily call himself fluent in all 7) We all know English, German, French, and Nora had a hc that Andrew and Neil learn Russian so they can talk to each other even with the cousins around which I love. Hebrew - In my hc Neil is jewish, as are Mary and Nathan. After running away, Mary didn’t know where to go once she had left her brother. She didn’t speak any other languages besides English, but she could understand Yiddish from hearing her grandparents and sometimes her parents speaking it growing up, and she could understand Polish from her time married to Nathan. She didn’t want to go to Poland in case any of Nathan’s contacts recognized her, so she decided to go to Israel. She knew there were communities there that spoke Yiddish and she was familiar if not comfortable with Hebrew from going to temple when she was younger. But most importantly she knew Nathan didn’t have any regular contacts there. While they were there, along with learning Hebrew, Mary pretended to be interested in converting to Greek Orthodox in order to get secret Greek lessons for her and Neil. After a while but sooner than she had hoped, Mary got a warning that Nathan had figured out where they were. She didn’t think it would be wise to go directly to Greece so she decided to move them to Prague next, since Czech and Polish are fairly similar and she really had no other ideas. While in Prague she continued her and Neil’s Greek lessons, and they went on to Greece eventually. Mary didn’t want them to lose any of the languages they learned, so she came up with a system that on certain days of the week they would speak to each other in certain languages. After Mary died, Neil pretty much gave up on Czech and Hebrew because he hadn’t been surrounded by them in so long and he hadn’t used either except with Mary since they moved from Prague or Israel. They had lived in Greece for longer than they had in Prague or Israel though, moving to a few different cities, so he felt stronger with Greek.

Fin. 

This is my first time writing anything fanfiction, my first time doing any creative writing at all really, and I would love any and all feedback!! Thanks for reading this long ass post, I hope it wasn’t terrible!!

[andrew-minyards-bitch]

Headcanons about Andrew and Aaron in high school (it's one in the morning and I miss them)

° they both somehow got the role of "jock" and "nerd"

° for Andrew it was more complicated but most people know him as "darker persona of his twin and someone u shouldn't mess with"

° and the reason for the reputation of "don't mess with him" wasn't bc of his ability to fight or wield knives.. no it was bc of an argument with the baseball team

° so Aaron was in the baseball team right and Andrew attends his games for moral support and Aaron hates it (secretly loves it bc someone he is close to and cares about is showing interest in him)

°after the game one of Aaron's teammates makes fun of him joking about how Aaron sucked at playing the game bc he missed a shot or sumn (I don't know anything about baseball don't come for me) and Andrew really doesn't care here bc he knows Aaron is joined the team for fun so no hurt feelings whatsoever

° until .. the bastard starts making fun of Aaron for flinching everytime someone raises their hands too fast and Andrew is in the stands but he can hear clearly bc the bastard is being so darn loud

° so Andrew goes up to said bastard and doesn't even mention the flinching thing bc he knew Aaron would be uncomfortable to talk about it

° and Andrew starts personally attacking the poor dude (verbally of course)

°"funny how you're projecting your insecurities to others but I don't think you can ever beg forgiveness for actually enjoying a ridiculous game such as baseball"

° the guy is obviously trying to defend his interest of the game but Andrew has a way with words and while the guy is stuttering to try to say something back Andrew just- does not hold back

° "yeah maybe if you focus more on how shitty and pathetic ur life is maybe u wouldn't have to cut down others who r more successful than u, I don't know what u think ur accomplishing here but popularity isn't it and nothing u can do will ever lead to a fullfiling life"

° and so the students avoid andrew bc they don't want him d e s t r o y i n g their self-esteem

° andrew was very territorial over aaron (we know this, it was mentioned in the book) but imagine if the reason for this was bc aaron went to prom with this girl and it failed terribly

° I'm saying like andrew having to stay up to practice help aaron with memorizing french or sumn and Aaron having to but said girl a present and he stole it from tilda which got him a beating (this got dark fast)

° Andrew has eidetic memory but he will not add any effort to his study but american education is shit anyways and all u do is memorize so Andrew usually gets higher scores then Aaron

° this drives Aaron bat shit crazy bc he's over here staying up till three studying for his ap exam and andrew is idk eating ice cream sundae and reading harry potter and wanting to beat the shit out of draco malfoy

°andrew also refused to read or even touch to kill a mockingbird bird bc he claimed it was supporting white male savior complex and was told from a white person's perspective who have never faced oppression and the white man saving the black man and not the cruel injustice the black man had to face

°aaron and andrew have one thing in common and that is they fückîng eat up poetry I don't make the rules they just do

° they read like foreign poetries, mind u they don't read it together so the other gets really prissy when one isn't fast enough and they're both yelling at each other to hurry td up

°andrew constantly makes fun of tilda just to rile up aaron

°aaron tries to piss andrew off by bringing up juvie but Andrew just talks about the lovely librarian that always recommend him some great books

° idk y'all can add some more I'm tired now

[lukesunbornn]

SOMEBODY SAID LONG HAIRED KEVIN AND BRAIN WENT BRRR SO HERE WE ARE

this is 1.6k of daysten, no nsfw beyond undetailed kissing, this is my first fic so pls be nice to me ❤️

It all starts when Kevin doesn’t feel like going for a haircut. Exy season is busy with games and interviews and appearances and everything else, and he just doesn’t have time to get to a salon. Plus, Kevin has to admit that he kinda likes how it feels when his bangs brush against his cheekbones.

There are some downsides to growing his hair out, though. For one thing, hair in the eyes in the middle of a game is not helpful for winning. He keeps having to pause to brush hair out of his eyes, and it’s getting in the way of his playing. Renee notices him eyeing her neatly pinned hair after a game one day, and the next morning Kevin finds some clips in his game bag.

The clips have some minor setbacks, though. Renee has a certain aesthetic, which her style mirrors. When Kevin walks into practice with sparkly butterflies in his hair, Nicky wolf-whistles and Seth bursts out laughing. Not the reaction Kevin was hoping for, but exactly what he was expecting. He realizes a second too late that he tenses up at their reaction, because for once he is actually happy with his appearance, but Neil, ever the observer, must notice his discomfort. Kevin walks to put down his bag and doesn’t miss the sound of Neil leisurely standing up, and the sudden thud of Seth and Nicky sitting back on the bench. There are no more comments about the state of Kevin’s hair.

All through practice, Kevin notices Neil’s eyes trailing him. Apparently, not even Neil likes his hair, no matter what he did in the locker room. Kevin doesn’t let it bother him, just keeps going through drills with Dan like he always does.

As his hair gets even longer, Kevin starts needing new ways to tie it back. Renee is still loaning him clips, but one morning she knocks on their door and Kevin answers.

“Oh hey Renee! Lemme go grab Andrew, I think he’s still in the shower.”

“Oh, actually, I wasn’t looking for Andrew! Can I braid your hair?”

Kevin feels a bit uneasy, but he follows Renee down the hallway to her room, knocking over some useless umbrella stand as he leaves. She perches on the end of her bed, and directs the much taller Kevin to sit on the floor between her legs. He’s somewhat uncomfortable at first with having his back to her, hands on his head, but he quickly becomes relaxed as she works her fingers through his hair and chatters about her day.

Renee is halfway through detailing a particularly interesting girl in her chemistry class when Neil bursts in, shirtless.

“HEY HAVE ANY OF YOU SEEN KEVIN HE’S NOT IN THE DORM AND THERE WAS A LOUD NOISE EARLIER AND HE DIDN’T SAY HE WAS LEAVING AND. oh,” Neil finishes, realizing Kevin’s sitting on the floor. Neil’s toned stomach begins to get slightly red. Not that Kevin was looking at it. “Sorry for bursting in and freaking out! Kevin, I didn’t know you braided your hair that’s so cool I like how you’re growing it out not that I care because you can do what you want with your hair but I admire how long it’s getting and. I’m gonna leave now,” The red has been creeping up Neil’s body throughout his speech until it nearly reaches his ears. Kevin has been watching it with interest this whole time, and is slightly disappointed that it’s going away.

Renee laughs, and turns back to braiding Kevin’s hair. “It’s sweet how much he cares about you,” is all she says on the matter before jumping right back into their previous conversation.

At the end of that day’s practice, Kevin’s been working hard, and his hair is thick with sweat. The braids worked perfectly, but he’s not used to having his hair tied up for so long and is starting to get a headache. He takes the bands out and his hair falls down to his chin, slightly wavy, and he hears a clatter behind him. Neil must be exhausted from the day’s exercises if he can’t even hold his racquet.

The next evening is movie night, and Kevin is in his usual spot on the floor, leaning against the couch and watching a truly awful movie Matt had picked out. Kevin is starting to fall asleep when he feels a body sliding onto the couch behind him and, a moment later, gentle fingers brushing through his hair. He tenses a bit, but the circular motions being massaged into his scalp feel so good that he instantly relaxes again. He assumes it’s just Renee playing, though in his half-drunk fog Kevin notices that these fingers are treating his hair a bit more delicately than they were this morning. Renee must be trying not to wake him up. He naps for a few more minutes, but awakes yet again when he feels the braid being tied off. He tilts his head back to thank Renee, and sees someone else.

Neil’s eyes are crinkling at the corners, but are fully lit up, the way they get when he’s learning a particularly challenging exy play. The corners of his mouth are slightly turned up in a lazy smile, with the tip of his tongue sticking out from the corner. His breath smells like candy and is coming out in little puffs, and Kevin only then realizes that Neil’s face is barely an inch above his own. At this distance, Kevin can see little freckles across Neil’s strong cheekbones, and he wonders what it would be like to trace them with his fingertips. He’s about to do so, when he realizes that would probably be really freaking weird, so he says nothing and continues to stare. But then he realizes he’s been sitting like this for five minutes already and maybe he should say something or at least thank Neil for the braids. He opens his mouth but all that comes out is, “Um. I’m going back to the dorm now,” and he does just that.

The rest of the week passes peacefully, with Kevin chatting with Renee as she braids his hair each morning, and Neil going for a run every time he and Kevin might be alone together, foiling every attempt of Kevin’s to request that Neil braid his hair again.

Luckily, it turns out that Kevin doesn’t even need to ask, because halfway through the next week’s movie night, Neil’s fingers start stroking through his hair again. Kevin glances up.

“Okay?” Neil asks.

“Okay.”

“Okay,” and Kevin is rewarded with a small smile before being directed to look straight ahead so the braids don’t come out crooked. 

It slowly becomes a thing, Neil playing with Kevin’s hair. Not only on movie nights either, as Neil has very restless fingers, constantly drumming on every surface imaginable. This has always been annoying to Kevin, until he discovers that removing Neil’s hands from the countertop and placing them on his head results in much less noise and many more hairstyles. Kevin stops going to Renee’s room in the mornings, because Neil lives closer and can braid just as well, if not better. 

Kevin admires the neatness and precision with which Neil braids, how evenly he adds the strands of hair, how the braids stay in despite never pulling. Kevin may not know everything about hair braiding, but he knows that if it were a sport, Neil would be the master. 

A few weeks later, at another of the team’s movie nights, Kevin is feeling peaceful and blissed out while Neil’s nimble fingers create an intricate fishtail braid. The final piece of hair is tied off, and then Kevin feels a kiss being placed on the top of his head. Kevin freezes, and Neil freezes, and the lights are off, and Kevin is weighing the chances of being seen if he looks up and makes Neil do it again on the lips, when suddenly the gentle weight atop his head vanishes and Neil has teleported across the room near Matt. Kevin remembers the blush he saw months ago with Renee, and wonders if it’s gotten to Neil’s ears yet.

Kevin is scared his personal braider is going to stop doing his hair after that, but Neil is back at the end of Kevin’s bed the next morning, elastics in hand. The only difference now is that whenever he ties off a braid, Neil also places a quick kiss to the top of Kevin’s head. Kevin tries to ignore the mushy feeling in his stomach every time.

Months go by, and Kevin doesn’t act on any of the feelings he’s been having, and it’s driving him a little bit crazy. So he can’t really be blamed, per se, when one night after a game, he catches Neil’s hand as he finishes the first of two braids and brings it down to brush his lips across Neil’s knuckles.

Neil lets out a little sound, almost like a whimper, and then instead of kissing Kevin’s head, moves to kiss him on the cheek. Kevin turns his head a bit, and they’re about to kiss for real, when Kevin moves his head back. “Ah, ah, ah! You’ve gotta do the other braid first!”

Neil is not one to half-do things, so of course it takes him fifteen minutes to finish the second braid, and Kevin can barely appreciate the feeling of the other man’s expert hands in his hair because he’s too busy thinking about what comes next. 

When Neil finally finishes, he skips the head kiss, tilting Kevin’s chin up to kiss him flat on the mouth. And wow.

Kevin has to admit, the only thing that feels better than Neil braiding his hair is Neil’s fingers on his head undoing all his hard work.