#i do have OCD perfectionist that is a bitch and i hate it

[squealformelittlepiggy]

ooc

do your emotions ever overwhelm you that its hard to focus? its rather annoying

[rossa-motte]

writeblr intro, blog.

So I finally decided to create a writeblr blog, and believe me: I've been stalking a lot of you for a while... so hi. I'm Rossa, 21 yo, argentinian (not from Buenos Aires, thank u), writer and obssesed with stories... all my life.

ABOUT ME

I write in Spanish, but I know quite a lot of English, and I plan to study English in college next year. I'm planning on being a translator. And maybe doing it freelance right now.

In my teenage years I wrote like 20 short stories, and started a lot of novels —only ended one, at 12/13 yo. Yikes. 

Between 2016 and midst of this year I focused in learning theory on writing and storytelling, because I'm a perfectionist and a couldn't write out of fear (yay!), but right now I'm writing again (not sarcastic yay!) 

Before my stories were like a YA Black Mirror, but right now I'm doing more adult dark fantasy, magical realism, contemporary fantasy, surrealism, and just messing around. Genre or litfic? Idk, maybe I'm wrong but I think most of the world doesn't have those categories, we just read and write lol

I'm in this crisis of not knowing what to read —I want to read local stories (hispanic or latinas) but the market isn't as diverse as in English countries, and people (at least in my circles) only read the classics. I also recently left YA behind, but fantasy is still my thing. I'm really looking for the adult book version of Studio Ghibli movies. 

Most important, I'm trying to create a platform and community to help hispanic people to write. Knowledge on storytelling isn't much in Spanish, so I'm trying to share in my language what I've learnt these years in English. But I really like the community here, so this is kind of a bonus. 

WHAT I'M WRITING

nyctophilia, collection of short stories.

the short stories I've been writing so far.

“love of darkness or night. finding relaxation or comfort in it”  — basically I always knew I love night, but recently I found that 11 of my 13 ideas (at the time, now I have more) take time during night. So it makes sense to publish a short story collection based on that.

I'm just at the beginning of it, and just two of the drafts are readable. "Cielo Rojo/Red Sky" and "Nada ni Nadie/Nothing and Nobody".

I really want to share my experience writing short stories after five years of not feeling able to!!

juana, a very character driven novel or a series of short stories.

magical realism or very very soft magic system in a low fantasy scenario.

chaotic found family of a small town in somewhere we can assume is Argentina travel to some big city to become artist and influencers. The problem is that our main girl doesn't want to but can't say no... and she sees the ghost of her dead aunt who never met buut has the same name as her. 

I'll start writing it after I feel more comfy with short stories.

it also happens like 80% at night.

white fire, a novel.

one of the novels I wrote as a teen but never ended.

really they aren't the same stories, just the same cast because I love them so much.

dark fantasy, adult, witches, kind of cozy kind of dark academia, religion and cults, based on my knowledge of neopaganism and chaos magick, latino-hispanic-italian lore.

YOU’RE STILL HERE, wanna know more? 

I have OCD. Hate to say it's relevant but fear and other topics related to that are strong themes in my stories.

I'm a planster. Mostly pantser I think, but I like to know certain details (main but vague plot points, basic scenery, and characters).

better rewriter than writer.

aesthetic bitch. Pinterest lord and savior.

talking about White Fire is a lil arbitrary, I have like 8 or 9 novels ideas besides Juana... and other ones. I think I might write White Fire after Juana but I can't promise that... I have some interesting shit. I think White Fire is more a confort story. 

I'll probably use instagram, megustaescribir, wattpad, sweek, inkspired and maybe booknet and medium for my essays and blogs and all that hispanic stuff. I'm not sure. 

but I don't know if publish my stories for free in those sites or try lit magazines. 

I would like to be traditionally published one day.

I'll try to translate at some point what I write to English.

if my English is off, please tell me. It's better for me. Thanks!

I also draw.

if you write and resonate with something here, please let me know! I want to know other writers :)

I also don't know shit of how Tumblr works, so I'll probably be messy. 

[captainshazamerica]

Hello! Can I get a ship with DCU, Game Of Thrones, Harry Potter (any era), The Hobbit, MCU, and Stranger Things? 💖 179 cm tall; dark brown, past shoulder-length hair with bangs; blue eyes (the left eye is mixed with hazel, aka, heterochromia iridium); heptagon face shape with dimples; rectangle body shape. Hufflepuff. INFP-T. Bi-curious. Pisces-Aries cusp sign. ”Looks like could kill you, but is actually a cinnamon roll.” At first, I may come off as reserved, shy, yet polite. I, as many of us, have a resting bitch face, that’s why people may think that I’m in a bad mood. It takes me a lot of time to warm up to somebody, cause I have social anxiety. Hate small talk, or speaking in front of the public. When I’m nervous, I tend to mess up my words or forget what I was supposed to say. I’m usually playful, dirty-minded and goofy around close friends. I’m the so-called, ”fashionista and mom” from my circle of friends. A perfectionist, punctual, over-thinker, slight control/clean freak (I definitely have an OCD). Stubborn in some situations. If I’m annoyed or getting impatient, I can say something witty or sarcastic. I’m constantly fighting an inner battle with myself, trying to accept myself. I don’t like to smile or laugh in public, cause of the small gap between my front teeth. I really hate taking selfies or somebody else taking pictures of me. The clothes I wear depends on my mood (and the weather outside), but it’s always a mix of smart casual/vintage/or comfortable. Don’t like doing things out of my comfort zone, prefer to stay indoors. Hate crying in public, or asking people for help (it makes me feel uncomfortable). I don’t like arguments, but I will square up if they come for my family or I snapped. I’m a kind-hearted person, always ready to help someone in need, quite modest as well. My hobbies include listening to any type of music, reading, watching movies or tv shows, traveling (if given the chance), and cleaning. Have a thing for writing. Very protective of my family. Divorced parents. Motherly towards kids and friends. An old soul, and the ”black sheep” of my family. A feminist, support LGBTQ+ community. Sometimes I like to try and cook easy recipes. Dislike coffee, prefer tea or orange juice. That’s it, - thanks!

Omg so sorry for taking forever! I got a job and that has been taking up all my time! Hope you like!

MCU: Vision

♡ He would never try to force you outside your comfort zone but would be supportive if you were ready

♡ He wouldn't be turned off from your resting bitch face

♡ using logic to and facts to help you see yourself like he sees you and cant understand why you dont accept yourself because he thinks your perfect

Stranger Things: Jonathan Byers

♡ Practically adopting Will and the Party and being so protective of them

♡ Jonathan occasionally getting jealous when you seem to give the kids more of your attention, but also loves it and finds it adorable

♡ Getting good at dodging him when he tries to take pictures of you, but them coming out all cute and blurred and artistic

♡ Also being a black sheep, he seems he would totally get you and relate to you

DCU: Victor Stone

Game of Thrones: Jon Snow

HP: James Potter

Hobbit: Fili

[silverncrimson]

( oscar isaac, 39, cismale, he / him ) Was that EZEKIEL ‘ZEKE’ MARCOLAS ? I heard a rumor they work for the O’SHEA family, but who knows for sure ? They can be a bit CALLOUS & UNETHICAL, but I also heard they can be METICULOUS & PERCEPTIVE. You’ll usually find them at SKYFALL in their spare time, when they’re not being the OWNER OF MALNATI PIZZERIA. You may want to keep an eye on that one !

- B A S I C -

Full Name: Ezekiel Miguel Marcolas Nickname(s): Zeke Age: Thirty-Nine Occupation: Owner of Malnati Pizzeria Affiliation: O’Shea Birthday: February 12th Zodiac: Aquarius

Sexual Orientation: Heterosexual Alignment: Chaotic Evil

- F A M I L Y -

Father: Miguel Marcolas (deceased) Mother: Ruth Marcolas (deceased) Siblings: Constantine (35), Uriel (30), Isaiah (28), Yesenia (24)

Ex-Wife: Lucia Daughters: Stella & Stefania (15) Son: Raul (8)

- A P P E A R A N C E -

Height: 5′9″ Hair Color / Type:  Dark brown  Eye Color: Brown Piercings / Tattoos:  No piercings. Five tattoos - the Chi Ro symbol on his left shoulder, being one of them

- H I S   Q U I R K S -

He wears black leather gloves at ALL TIMES

He carries around with him pocket rags / handkerchiefs and disinfectant spray, for wiping down surfaces if he needs to

He burns EVERYTHING he gets dirty, usually from blood splatter - whether it’s his fancy jackets or his gloves (he’s got about a hundred backup pairs - several of them he keeps in his glove compartment). 

He’s super meticulous about his clothes - they must be clean and tidy at all times

He often repeats himself, or counts out loud to himself

Does things in repetitions, especially if he is stressed about something

He will avoid cracks in the sidewalk

He will NOT shake your hand, or touch you at all...unless you’re his target

He drinks a shit lot of bourbon

Smokes a shit ton of cigars and cigarettes, alike

Very antisocial and a loner, but will talk to people if they initiate a conversation

- P E R S O N A L I T Y -

(+) Fiercely Loyal, Calm, Meticulous, Observant, Perceptive (-) Callous, Unethical, Intense, Inflexible, Perfectionist

- H I S   D E M O N S -

He suffers from: OCD, Mysophobia, Claustrophobia

Excessive thoughts (obsessions) that lead to repetitive behaviors (compulsions).Obsessive-compulsive disorder is characterized by unreasonable thoughts and fears (obsessions) that lead to compulsive behaviors. 

OCD often centers on themes such as a fear of germs or the need to arrange objects in a specific manner.

compulsive behavior

agitation

hypervigilance

impulsivity

meaningless and persistent repetition of own words or actions

repetitive movements

ritualistic behavior

social isolation

Mysophobia, also known as verminophobia, germophobia, germaphobia, bacillophobia and bacteriophobia, is a pathological fear of contamination and germs.

- B I O G R A P H Y -

Life long resident of Chicago, IL

The oldest of five kids. He’s got three younger brothers and a younger sister - they’re not all that close.

He suffers from OCD and Mysophobia, and a mild case of Claustrophobia - all of which developed when he was a very young child. 

He had spent the summer with his aunt in Springfield, while his parents went to Mexico to visit his paternal grandparents. His Aunt Marina, unfortunately, turned out to be a massive hoarder. Her house was an absolute nightmare - disgustingly filled to the max with literal garbage, and other useless, dirty junk that she’d collected over a good ten or so years. There was no livable space anywhere, not even a proper bed, except for a very small nook in the corner of the house. He remembers vividly, to this day, the infestation of roaches, mice, rats and dead carcasses of rodents and cats, and not to mention all the fecal matter of said animals, that he’d come across that summer. The smell alone...

Even to his then four year old brain, it had been more than enough to traumatize him for life, despite not remembering much else about it.

Nowadays, he wears a pair of black leather gloves wherever he goes.

He's the owner of Malnati Pizzeria - has owned the place for ten years, his dad owning it before him. When his papi passed away, the business was then passed to Zeke.

Is divorced. He's got a vindictive ex-wife, two teen daughters (twins) and an 8 year old son - all three of whom he hardly sees these days because his ex-wife's such a bitch and has gotten the court to deny him visitation rights. So he's bitter, and angry, and HATES that woman with a passion.

His childhood was not terrible, but it wasn’t all that great, either. Especially for a kid who did suffer from OCD and who was a germaphobe.

For a good portion of his life, his family always struggled with income, and growing up in poverty in a large city like Chicago was not exactly a blast. They lived on the north side of the city, in a small, cramped, rundown apartment - it had two bedrooms, one bathroom, and it was always infested with cockroaches and mice, and spiders. His literal nightmare.

The walls were super thin, the floor tiles loose or broken, and the AC and heater rarely worked, so it was often way too cold or too hot, but never comfortable. With a family of seven living within it’s walls, it was...claustrophobic to say the least.

Things started to change gradually when he was around 12. His papi got fired from his job as a taxi driver due to him being a liability after being in one too many road-side accidents, which desperately drove him to search for work elsewhere. Somehow, and Zeke never did get the full answer from him, Miguel Marcolas wound up working for the O’Sheas. He was eventually given Malnati Pizzeria as a ‘gift’, a place of business that he could call his own, so long as he stayed loyal and did his part to keep O’Shea business running smoothly.

Zeke had always been a highly intelligent individual, scarily so, so he was quick to pick up on the changes in both his father and their financial situation. They went from barely having anything to eat or any clothes to wear, presents to give out for Christmas or birthdays, to having all that and more...more than any of them had ever had before. Of course, he wasn’t one to knock a good thing like a newfound well of money. Questioning where the pizzeria came from and how his papi was able to afford ownership wasn’t something Zeke cared to do, or know the answer to. It didn’t matter.

Though he knew deep down that whatever it was his papi was dabbling in, definitely wasn’t honorable or lawful...but again, the kid didn’t care. It eventually got him and his family out of that shit apartment, and that was a godsend in his eyes.

The older he got, the more he started helping out at the pizzeria, and by the time he was 14, Zeke had met a fair share of the members of the O’Shea gang. Because he wasn’t just another stupid and naive kid, by that time he’d already figured out exactly who his papi worked for; instead of being scared like most kids might have been, what with being surrounded on a daily basis with some of the worst criminals that the city had to offer, Zeke had felt safe in their presence. He felt in awe of those men and women and the power they held.

The uppers that passed through Malnati had their eyes on him from day one, it seemed. They clearly saw the keenness in his eyes, and the idolization, but also a great potential, because they kept him around. His father, not an affectionate or loving man by any means of the word, watched on proudly as his associates took an interest in his eldest son, quickly shaping and morphing his impressionable young mind.

At the age of seventeen, Zeke proudly received his Chi Rho, joining the O’Sheas as a sentinel. Like many, he’d have to prove to them all that he was worthy of the tattoo, and boy was he ready...and he sure as hell proved that, to.

Zeke was as loyal as one could be to the O’Sheas, and despite his OCD and Mysophobia that he had to contend with, he had his ways of working around that, and he quickly became a deadly killing machine under the close training of his General handler at the time. He rose rapidly through the ranks, until he reached his desired position among the gang - Bonebreaker.

He’s been a Bonebreaker for going on fifteen years now, and he was still thriving. He was a stone-faced killer, a psychopath with no emotions, no qualms about taking out whatever hit he was assigned. There was no remorse for what he did, and he doubted that there would ever be...he wasn’t capable of that kind of emotion.

- W A N T E D   C O N N E C T I O N S -

Ex-Wife - He didn’t get worked up over a lot of things; it actually took quite a bit for him to even show that much emotion, but his ex-wife was certainly capable of pushing all of his buttons. He absolutely hated her, and the only reason she wasn’t dead, was because of his children’s sake. Despite not outwardly showing his love for his daughters and son, he did love them...as much as he was able to. They were about the only thing he truly felt any sort of positive emotions towards.

O’Sheas / Affiliates

Bonebreaker Interactions

Reaper Interactions

Malnati Pizzeria customers

Malnati Pizzeria employees

Anything!

[muffintopchai]

A description of my characters because nobody asked

I wanna describe their personalities because yes.

Lea: Smol bean who loves little kid cartoons and pastel colors. She is a huge sunbeam/ jokester who can’t stand to see people sad. Pigtail gang for life. Has depression and is abused by her mother who has most custody of her. Has a perfectionist complex because of her. Very small and thin.

Chai: Likes to put on a tough girl act, but is a huge softie and loves reading and nerdy things. Can beat you at video games, loves the classics. Has body issues for being a bit chuibbier than most of her friends that work out and do volunteering and stuff, especially compared to Lea (who is s t a r v e d by her  p a r e n t s). Is my favorite character and must be protected AT ALL COSTS!!Is also a huge weeb and wants to cosplay when she’s older. :P

Cami: Leader of the bunch cuz her parents own the coffee shop they all work at. Tired TM. Has terrible insomnia and often stays up all night doing nothing because of it. Her parents are nice, hardworking people who had a kid too young and are just trying to support themselves. She always has a mug of coffee and is just That Bitch all the time.

Beatrice: The clutzy one who can’t walk right. She is that anime character that can’t for the lives of millions of people, fuckin stand on her own two feet. Always wears clothes two sizes too big because her family is very poor and her dad drinks all their money away. She started off working at the coffee shop to support her family until she was old enough to gather all her siblings and run away from their dad. Very hardworking but falls over a lot. Has a big scar over her eye that she says is a birthmark but is actually from where her dad smashed a bottle over her head during a drunken stupor. oof this one is long.

Cleo: A cute Muslim girl who lives with her uncle. Her uncle is very controlling and uses his religion as a means to keep her in line. Cleo hates being Muslim and doesn’t believe in God or Allah or whatever-the-fuck. She is super cute, but WILL cut you if you hurt her friends. She loves helping people though, and wants to start a charity when she gets older.

Harmony: A very tight-knit, studious girl with OCD. She needs to know more than everyone around her, and is constantly researching things. When people are ignorant she gets p i s s e d and might start smacking you with the power of KNOWLEDGE! She will fucking eat your face if you move anything out of its place, but is normally pretty calm, cool and collected. Has trouble with her memory though.

Leo: They are nb and have anxiety. Very prone to panic attacks and has near crippling social anxiety. Totally has a positivity tumblr and won't stop gushing about Creepshow art on YT. An aspiring animator who loves their friends and super totally has HUGE crush on Cleo. Needless to say they're my child and they are amazing and I cant believe I forgot them when first writing this post.

[only-one-reason-blog1]

From me to you

You’ve decided to write about eating disorders, which is perfectly GREAT of course. The more visibility (of the right kind) the better. If you, the writer, do not have an eating disorder, that is GREATER! GREATEREST? LOL

My hope is to help you with characterization and help with how the character might be feeling or thinking should you wish for help. I am MORE than happy to help because the more real and less romanticized EDs and Mental Health issues are, the better.

Eating disorders have a lot less to do with food and a whole lot more to do with control. That is why people with eating disorders tend to be perfectionists (or type A personalities) that are putting way too much pressure on ourselves and people who feel like our life is beyond our control and food is something we have control over.

Some ground rules and information:

-I will not “teach” you to “be anorexic”, it’s NOT a cool diet plan to try. Many of us suffer with long-term health issues after recovery. Eating disorders are ugly. You get sucked in and the quicker you get out, the better.

-I would not recommend idiums like “nothing tastes as good as skinny feels” or “everytime you say no to food, you say yes to skinny” because they are beyond stupid

-I have been in recovery for several years and talk about the gory details with other people (and other authors) often, rarely have I ever woken my Anorexia up (figure of speech), the first incidence that there might be a problem is when I go to my health care team so it doesn’t become ingrained again so don’t worry about that. That bitch gets a permanent sleeping pill (another thing, people sometimes think of anorexia like it’s a completely separate entity from ourselves)

- I am more than happy to discuss recovery with other people who are struggling with EDs or SH or MH issues. I will, however, not become your entire support system. Sorry if that sounds harsh.

-OCD doesn’t exclusively mean being clean and tidy or being afraid of germs

-Depression is not always staring out the window wistfully or being a little sad, sometimes it’s not being able to get out of bed for days or not having enough energy to clean your sheets for months at a time for example. Of not caring enough to eat, or eat well at least, which is an issue if you’re recovering from an eating disorder, it just compounds the problem. You can make your character sad about a situation without them being depressed.

So I hope I can help, I honestly do. You may know me by my nickname on AQConfessions which is Bitchy the Dwarf but I promise my bark is way worse than my bite.

Be well and don’t be afraid to reach out. Ana (Here’s some irony realness, that isn’t a play on Anorexia, THAT’S HOW MY NAME IS ACTUALLY SPELLED LOL! I hate being German.)