#i do have an ao3 account where i post my finished fics if you'd like to check it out

[justallihere]

Hi there! Welcome - I'm Alli (she/her). I like concerts, books, and science. My favorite color is pink and my favorite band is Fall Out Boy. At this time I'm writing fics for The Empyrean (Fourth Wing) series, but someday in the future I might expand that list. Thanks for joining the chaos!

Most of you probably know me from AO3 by the same username. Below you can find my entire masterlist of fics as well as some frequently asked questions. If there's something you'd like to know that isn't addressed below, my ask box is always open 🫶🏻

✨ masterlist:

storm in the quiet (E)

Xaden/Violet, arranged marriage AU, > 200k words, ongoing

It took only a few minutes for Violet to figure out what purpose she served. No one said it out loud—not yet, but they’d get there—but they kept throwing out words like formalizing alliances and uniting two groups, and she understood. Violet was a sacrificial lamb, and Xaden Riorson was the wolf, and her slaughter would be their marriage.

(find sitq deleted moments here, here, and here)

simmer (E)

Xaden/Violet, one shot, 4.1k words, complete

The night that Tairn began channeling to Violet, she didn’t stumble upon Xaden in the snow. She found someone else to take care of her, and when Xaden realized, he was less than amused.

violence in my veins (E)

Xaden/Violet, one shot, 4.1k words, complete

The Riders’ Quadrant had something of an obsession with piercings. The only person Violet Sorrengail knew without any was, of course, Xaden Riorson. Or so she thought.

invisible in a violet sea (E)

Xaden/Violet, one shot, 2k words, complete

“It’s just me here, love. Tell me what you need so badly, Violence.” There was something about the way he said the private nickname in this context, with his voice low and husky, that made it feel entirely different from every other time he called her that. Like it was reverent and special and it, like her, belonged only to him. “You,” she said. “I need you, Xaden.”

void of all composure (E)

Liam/Violet/Cam, one shot, 2.8k words, complete

Liam Mairi figured it couldn’t be that hard to keep Violet Sorrengail out of trouble. Unfortunately, he didn’t account for the fact that her version of trouble was Cam Tauri, and Liam was certainly going to go down with her.

somehow i still love you more (G)

Xaden/Violet, kid fic, one shot, 800 words, complete

Xaden’s favorite time was the middle of the night, when his wife slept peacefully and he got to hold his daughter and watch the snow falling.

✨FAQs:

Do you have an update schedule?

Nope. Fanfic is a hobby for me—I have other responsibilities and a full-time job. I write because it’s fun, and in order for it to stay that way I write and post as I’m able, and sometimes I step away for a week or two to maintain my own sanity. Unless I specifically say it, I promise my fics aren’t abandoned just because it’s been a few days without a new chapter. Please don’t ask me about updates!

Do you take requests for fics?

I do not. I write things that I love or am inspired by. Trying to conform to specific requests kind of sucks the joy out of writing for me.

Can I write something inspired by your fics?

Go for it! Fanfiction is fanfiction. At the end of the day we’re all just playing in the same sandbox, and the tropes and ideas I use aren’t unique. Twist them however you want, and have fun writing your own take on them. If you want others to know where your inspiration came from, you can use the “inspired by” function on AO3, or link back to my fic in some way if you’re posting your work on another site. That can also be helpful for readers to find similar works.

Can I bind your fics?

Yes, for personal use only. You may not commission any third party that would make a profit off binding the fic to do the work for you. You may not sell bound copies of my fics. Everything I’ve written has been done for free, as my own personal love letter from me to fandom. Keep fanfiction safe and legal. And send me pictures—I’d love to see your finished projects!

Will you ever write your own book?

I'd love to one day! I have lots of ideas floating around at all times, even though I don't talk about them much. I promise if I ever publish any original works, you'll know.

How long will storm in the quiet be?

Right now I’m estimating about 55-60 chapters—that’s just a best guess, if it changes as we get closer to the end, I’ll update this answer.

Will storm in the quiet have a sequel?

Nope.

Are you going to kill Liam?

No. I promise. I know you’re all traumatized, but please read the tags on AO3. There’s one that says “Liam lives!” and it means he lives all the way to the end and it’s not a joke 😅

When will Xaden and Violet fuck?

Never if you keep testing me. Enjoy the slow burn! I’m begging! (And if you can’t, go check out my one shots. They’re very smutty.)

✨ other info:

Find some of my favorite book recs here

Some great Fourth Wing fic recs here (my own faves and a lot of other good ones that I missed in the comments)

If you’re interested in what I might be currently reading, click here

[zirobitches]

One Piece: Soulmate AU

Always in this twilight - Crocodile x GN!Reader

Summary: Soulmates are incapable of hurting each other. As a pirate, this leads to some tragic moments midst battles. You thought you were prepared for when it might happen to you, but damn you were wrong.

Gn! Reader, Angst no comfort, no beta we die like Roger, Reader is Croc's First Mate and a former Roger pirate (Shanks/Buggy's age) but it doesnt really matter, also former slave background, congrats you are now in the place of my self insert OC, no promises on not being cringe this is literally a /reader fic, also had to make a fake crew bc we dont know enough crocs backstory HAND IT OVER ODA

Word count: 4500+

Also first fic on tumblr, idk what im doing here, lmk ur opinions. It is now 2:03am and i have class at 10:30. Might have to skip lmao

EDITS: grammar check lol. also cross posted it on ao3 - same name as my blog

-----------

Soulmates weren't as common as you'd might assume when you first hear about it. There's an easy way to prove someone is your soulmate, but when that method is to harm them, well, it doesn't make it easy to find that person. And society gets a bit weird when you know your soulmate is out there.

you've known that some people carry around little needles to poke into strangers hoping to find the one. But that was in decent society; among pirates you more often heard tales of bullets suddenly dropping to the ground after they hit their target, or swords stopping on someone's skin as though it just hit steel. A battlefield is a hell of a place to meet the person fate had decided for you, but for pirates it had become a norm.

Not that long ago, some genius named Vegapunk did a study on how many people meet their soulmate - 1 in a 100. And that's just how many people find them. It never accounts for how many actually happily end up together. You had chosen to live your life as a pirate, so a happy ending with your supposed soulmate wasn't something you foresaw in your future.

You were always grateful most of your current crew felt the same. There was a small group among pirates that were always on the lookout to find their soulmate and then immediately retire. Your crew however like to joke that if they found them in battle, they would move out of the way so someone else could finish them off. It was a grim reality, but it was your reality.

However, on nights like these where you drank the night away, some romantic always had to bring it up.

"C'mon, did old Roger really make you so cold hearted that you don't believe in true love?"

"Pfft, you're fucking joking right?" You scoffed back. You always argued with Tink about this, but you understood your young navigator still had hope. Too bad you were the pessimist of the crew.

"It's not that I don't believe in true love," you continued. "Soulmates are real, I don't really see another explanation for not being able to harm only one other person in the world. But why limit yourself to waiting for a person you might never meet? So many are denying themselves to fall in love with someone else and then end up dying alone because they never found their soulmate."

Tink pouted in front of you. This was a tired conversation, one that was repeated every few weeks much to the chagrin of your other crewmates. But a controversial topic was always a great topic for a group such as yourselves.

"I'm not denying myself the chance to fall in love! I'm denying ever feeling heartbroken over someone who doesn't matter!" Tink tried to argue back, but you just groaned in response.

"And if you never meet the one? You'll just live and die without ever letting yourself even get a taste of what it is you're chasing." Tink glared, knowing it was futile to keep going, but the pink of her cheeks told you that the grog in her system was trying to get her to keep fighting.

It was then that a familiar tall figure caught your eye. There was your beloved captain Crocodile, trying to sneak behind everyone's back to grab another bottle for himself.

Crocodile was never much one for festivities, at least not one 'undeserved' as he might put it. While there was no battle won to celebrate, the night sky was clear and the waters calm; in the Grand Line, shouldn't that be enough to be happy about?

However tonight you weren't going to let him sneak booze and hide from the crew.

"Cap'n!" Apparently the grog was getting to you as well. "Come over here and help me crush Tink's dream of a soulmate!" You laughed as Tink gasped at your audacity. The rest of your company seemed more or less happy with how the night was going, but your captain was still less than enthused to join.

"If this is the same soulmate debate you've been going on about for the past 3 years, I will pass again. You already know my feelings on the matter." Crocodile's deep voice reverberated across the deck of the ship. Even if he wasn't giving orders, he still commanded the attention of everyone within earshot.

He gave a long drag of the bottle in his hand, and then turned to walk away. However you felt it was your duty as first mate to pester your captain into spending casual time with his crew.

"I may know your opinion, but would you be so kind and gracious to remind the rest of the crew? Perhaps?" You called out to the dark coat trying to run from the party, and saw him pause, then turn to walk back.

You could see some of the newer additions to the crew cower. You didn't blame them, Crocodile was an imposing figure, and was developing a infamous reputation as a pirate on the Grand Line. But he was your captain, and he would never hurt his crew, this you knew.

"If I ever met my soulmate," Crocodile began, "I assume it would be when I attempt to kill them." He took another sip from his bottle. This was one of the rare moments he was not puffing a cigar you suddenly realize. It made his face look younger, as though he was actually a man in his 20s as he claimed he was.

As though he knew you were thinking of him, Crocodile made eye contact with you. "When I realize I can't kill them, I'll call out for you." You felt your heart skip a beat. "Then you can finish them for me."

It was purely the grog's fault for making your face warm. The lack of a sea breeze was also suddenly apparent. But you couldn't be flustered, not when you were the one who asked for this answer.

You smiled, doing your best to brush off the tension. You were still maintaining eye contact with him after all. "Well there you have it. Not exactly the opinion I remember, but I hope I can live up to your expectations, Cap'n."

Crocodile nodded, then told you all to start to sober up or get to bed. "I don't need a crew of drunks on the Grand Line, or else we will never make it to the New World."

Your crew began to disperse and you went below deck to your cabin. You really hadn't had much to drink that night, yet your chest felt tight.

You thought you had learned your lesson, but no. Even after promising yourself you wouldn't, you became attached to your crew. Even after your last one fell apart. Even after you watched your first captain, your savior, be executed, you fucked up and dove straight into a different crew expecting it to be different.

You laid down in your bed, staring at the ceiling, the world slightly spinning. Suddenly all you can think about is when you met Croc.

-

It was little more than 3 years ago now, wasn't it? A whole 3 years since Roger died. The weight is still heavy in your chest, but not nearly as devastating as it was in Logue Town that day. You were a wreck, physically and emotionally.

After watching the execution, you were too heartbroken to join the others in pursuit of the One Piece. Your world has just officially ended, the crew was technically already disbanded, but now there was no hope of getting it back.

You ended up in some local bar. No one recognized you, and in the haze of all the excitement following Roger's death, why would they? You had just been some nobody apprentice who happened to stick on his ship after Roger saved your life.

But your sorrow did catch someone's eye.

You sat at the counter of this dive bar in Logue Town, mindlessly stirring whatever number drink sat in front of you now. You had run out of tears, and sat stuck in some frozen state of grief.

However, this sad portrait of yourself did not seem to deter someone from sitting next to you.

You paid them no mind, just staring into empty space, not enough energy to even remember you were still alive.

"You were a member of the Pirate King's crew weren't you?"

A deep voice rattled from the stranger, but it was his words that really caught your attention.

"How'd you figure?" You had paused your stirring at first, but now focused on your drink to avoid eye contact. You were a mess, you could feel your puffy eyes, and were still sniffling every so often.

"There's no reason anyone in this town should be sad that someone like him died. So, you must have known him, right?" The deep voice continued, and you could feel their eyes staring, but didn't have the strength to meet them.

"Well, you caught me. Going to take me in and see if you can get a reward? I'm afraid you won't find any posters of me though. I tended to get lost in the crowd, you could say." After that statement you finally grasped the glass in front of you and decided to knock back what was left. If this was the end of your little pirating career, so be it. It can die with Roger.

"Will you join my crew?"

Your head snapped up at that, and you finally looked up at the stranger.

Long black hair was slicked back to show all the sharp features of the man's face. A strong square jaw, a prominent, perfect nose, and pale, piercing eyes, hooded by thin black eyebrows. Undoubtedly, even in your drunken haze, you were sure sober you would agree the man was handsome.

After a moment to take in this stranger all you could manage was a "Excuse me?"

He smiled - no, smirked - and pulled a cigar out from his coat. "I could use someone with your experience on my crew." He carried on, as if you were discussing the weather outside. He lit the cigar with a lighter you hadn't noticed him pull out. Perhaps it was the booze, but looking at this guy, he almost seemed… fuzzy, around the edges.

"Having someone who once worked for the Pirate King should help me become the next Pirate King."

The stranger took a long drag from his cigar, then exhaled over the counter. You didn't know where the barkeep was now, but at the moment, it felt like you and him were the only people in the building.

You should be mad. Enraged at the audacity of someone to come up to you on the worst day of your life, and to ask you to work for them. But you felt nothing.

No. That wasn't right. You did feel something.

You chuckled. Giggled even. A small laugh that built up till you were laughing, nearly hysterically. You hadn't felt like this sort of light headed elation in a long time, and it was nice.

After taking a moment to catch your breath you finally looked back at the stranger. He didn't look upset at your reaction. He just kept smoking his cigar, waiting for an answer.

"I'm afraid I didn't catch your name."

"I am Sir Crocodile, captain of the Neverland Pirates."

"Hmmm. Well, Sir Crocodile, I can tell you now that you have no chance of being Pirate King." You smirked back at him, propping your head up on your hand as you leaned against the counter.

This response still didn't bother the man. If anything, you swore he almost seemed… satisfied by your answer. Perhaps he knows what's coming next.

"I can help you out on the Grand Line and maybe help you get to the New World, but I promise," you leaned in towards this captain, staring him down. "You will never be the man Roger was. No one will."

Yet Crocodile was unperturbed.

"So you'll join my crew?"

You leaned back and reassessed your empty glass. You cast a quick glance at the bar and then back at the other pirate.

"Sure. I don't have anything better to do anyways."

-

You thought back in Logue Town you could never feel the same way about Crocodile's crew that you felt with Roger's, but you were always the fool. Now you are attached.

Now you need a reason to leave.

You couldn't waste your time or your heart with them. You had already died once with Roger, and if you stayed any longer you know you could never leave alive. You got up from bed - still plenty tipsy you swayed over - to your dresser.

Middle drawer, back left, underneath some no longer worn t-shirts was a small box. You opened it.

There were several small scraps of paper. Vivre cards.

As a child on Roger's boat, you were ecstatic to learn about vivre cards. A simple way to know the people you loved were alive and safe, and be able to find their exact location? It was too good to be true.

When you remember the feeling of Roger's paper burning in your hands at his execution, you knew the reality of vivre cards.

Your fingertips gently sorted through the papers you had made for some of Roger's crew. Each had a tiny name written in a corner. Shanks, Buggy, Ray, Gaban, Oden, and a few others of people who had been most important to you.

Maybe you could leave this crew and seek out the others. Rayleigh had always said he would retire at Sabaody, and your crew was bound to get there soon, hopefully in a couple months. The ache in your chest; you missed your old family. This could be the excuse you needed.

With a heavy sigh you closed the box and hid it away again. Sleeping on it would be good. Sleeping away the booze would also be nice.

Maybe then the tears would stop silently slipping down your face.

-

It turns out the excuse of seeing your old crew was unneeded. The news coo was kind enough to drop a reason to leave directly in your lap.

You stared at the newspaper for a long moment. The sinking feeling in your gut still did not go away.

You walked up to the bow where Crocodile was standing. He stared at the horizon as you approached the next island, Water 7.

"Captain."

Crocodile turned to look at you, face neutral, signature cigar in his mouth.

"Morning. The news any good?"

"They want to make you a Warlord."

Your own feelings were swept under the rug as your crewmates overheard. Instantly the deck was buzzing, the news spreading and making the once sleepy, slightly hungover crew come back to life.

"This is perfect!" The helmsman Diat yelled, a grin wide on his face. "Not only do we get the Marines off our back, it's recognition that we are some of the strongest pirates on the Grand Line!"

You would have laughed at him if not for the ice in your chest. Similar celebratory remarks were made all around you, but you didn't have the strength to pretend this was good news to you.

All you could feel was an icy feeling on your back, right where you had a large scar that tore up a long faded tattoo. But time could not get rid of the mark you could never forget about, no matter how much you wanted to.

Amid the spontaneous party you finally turned back to Crocodile. Amidst it all, he was still only looking at you.

Your words were quiet compared to the raucous around you, but your captain heard you just fine.

"If you become a Warlord I'm leaving the crew."

A couple of nearby crew gasped, heads whipped in your direction and murmurs quickly took place of all the yells.

Instantly protests, people yelling your name, yelling their arguments, but it all fell on deaf ears as you stared down your captain.

Tink of all people knew it was futile to argue with you, and turned to the man of the hour. "Captain! You can't just let your first mate leave!"

Before she could continue, Crocodile interjected. "You never planned on making me King of the Pirates, right? So you never planned on staying on this ship anyways."

This evoked even more protests from the crowd. Many of them weren't sure what you two were talking about, and some had begun to yell again.

The sounds were starting to be overwhelming, and this was not a conversation that required the whole crew anyways.

"That's enough from everyone!" You yelled over the cacophony. The crew went quiet. "This is a conversation for me and the captain, the rest of you need to beat it! Do something useful, we will make a port soon."

The crowd was not placated in the least, but it was true the ship would be docked soon, and there were things that needed to be prepared beforehand.

"You heard them. Get back to work." Crocodile finished your command, and the crowd dispersed. You knew they would still be listening, but it didn't stop you.

"I refuse to be part of a crew that works alongside the Marines. If you become a Warlord you automatically become their dog - then you may as well be a dog of the celestial dragons." Your tongue burned even at the mention of the world nobles.

Crocodile took a long drag of his cigar. He looked away from you and sighed an exhale of smoke, then dragged his line of sight back to you.

"I haven't decided yet."

You bristled at this. "Are you suggesting they already offered this to you? And I had to find out through a newspaper?"

Crocodile took yet another drag, and you lost your patience with his nicotine addiction. "Answer me Crocodile."

Your captain sighed through his nose this time, some of the smoke reaching you, a familiar smell after all these years. It once may have been a nice fragrance, knowing your captain was near, but now it blinded you and stoked your anger.

"We are almost to Water 7. Let's save it for there."

-

Tensions were high, especially between you and Crocodile, when your mood worsened when he disappeared while you oversaw the docking. But you docked. You got the crew into a hotel. During this time the crew began splitting into sides, which was not something you had anticipated. But you ignored it all until finally, Crocodile returned and you cornered him into in a room alone with you.

He had no cigar, and you had no drink in hand. It was a painfully sober room.

Crocodile sighed and slumped into an armchair. He dragged his eyes across the room till they met yours. You refused to look away this time, jaw set with determination to stand your ground.

"I don't want to be the Marine's dog," Croc began. "But they offered me a deal."

"The deal that our crimes are excused? Big whoop, as long as we don't get caught it's almost the same."

"No," he sighed, a large ring covered hand dragging down his face in exasperation. "A deal to help take down Whitebeard."

That got you silent. For a moment, as you recalled every time you saw Roger and Whitebeard exchange blows and fight for days on end.

"You? Take down Whitebeard?" You laughed, but it was a dry and bitter thing. "Your bounty is $81 million berries. Your devil fruit is great and all, but it is by no means fight and beat Whitebeard good. Even if Newgate was without his crew, our entire crew would be wiped off the map. You've lost it if you truly believe that this is achieveable."

Crocodile glared from across the room. Not his usual, perpetual glare, but a genuine, freeze you in your tracks ice cold glare.

He stood up, all 8 feet imposing over you as he stalked across the room. "I have let you say plenty of cruel things to me, but this may cross the line."

But you were his first mate and you couldn't fear him if you were supposed to talk sense into him. "Cross the line? I'm not the one who is making deals with the Navy so I can sail us to our deaths at the hands of Whitebeard!" You were yelling now, no, roaring at your foolish headstrong captain.

"If you take that ship and that crew as it is now to the New World to fight Whitebeard and his sons, no one will come back alive!" Your heart was on fire with rage and frozen in fear. Rage at your captain, who is very much overestimating his abilities. Fear for your crewmates who have no idea what sort of danger their captain was going to put them in.

Crocodile was now truly enraged on the same level as you. He sneered down at you as he suddenly grabbed you by the neck - much to your shock. "I wanted you there to see me become the next Pirate King. But if you can't support me for this, one of the biggest moments in my life since I've been a pirate, then I have no need for you anymore."

With his free hand he opened the door that was behind you. A group of Marines walked in with cuffs ready. "To sweeten the deal, what better than to give a former Roger pirate to the Navy?"

You felt all the blood drain from your face, as fear for your own well being finally pierced your heart. You looked up at Crocodile, and you could feel tears begin to creep at the corner of your eyes. "You never fail to surprise me, Captain."

"Well done Sir Crocodile." One of the Marines spoke, and you could tell from their uniform it was a Vice Admiral, though you didn't recognize them.

"A public execution of a Roger's pirate should be a grand way to ring in your instatement as Warlord."

You felt the world slow down around you and felt Crocodile's grip on your neck slip at the Marine's sentencing.

Crocodile began to speak, "That was not what we agreed on," But your ears had begun to ring.

Growing up on the Oro Jackson, you had picked up some neat tricks. You found out you were hopeless with the color of observation haki, but had a special knack for color of arms. Perfect against those darn logia fruit users.

In a blink of an eye you ripped Crocodile's arm away from your neck and you made a mad dash past him. And jumped straight through a window, glass and all.

You could vaguely hear a commotion behind you as Marines ran after you, but it was lost with the ringing in your ears.

You could hear and feel your heartbeat, pounding throughout your body as you ran through the endless alleys and canals of Water 7. You could feel tears pierce through the wind rushing past your face as you ran, desperately with no objective.

All you could think about was the way the heat of Crocodile's hand felt on your neck, the cold metal of the rings that had pressed against your pulse.

Have you ever really touched Crocodile before?

…

You missed him. You didn't understand why. He had just betrayed you - fucking hell, he was just handing you over to the Navy as part of his deal to become a warlord, but god. You wanted to be with him anyways. You're not sure how long you've been in love with him; his sharp eyes, the smell of his cigars, the rings on his hands, but gods above.

You had fallen in love with Crocodile.

In your realization you slowed down. Your legs and lungs burned, you were gasping for air and not just because you had been running.

Has it always been this dark? When did the day leave you behind?

You now stood in some nondescript alley, dimly lit a golden hue by windows that lined it. It was a long alley, each end blocked by canals. How you arrived there you weren't certain. But you weren't alone.

At one end sand had appeared. And from it stepped your dear, awful captain Crocodile. You both stared at each other, both of you panting for breath.

"I didn't want it to be like this." Crocodile's voice cuts through the air to you. You knew you should run. But for some reason you couldn't find the strength.

"I didn't know they would execute you. I imagined they would send you to Impel Down." Crocodile continued to speak. You just stood there and listened as he walked towards you.

As you watched him, there was a strange look on his face. You've seen it before but still didn't know what it meant.

He stopped walking ten feet in front of you. The light was still too dim to see him clearly, but it was fine. You knew his face well enough.

"I won't let the Navy kill you. Not after what the nobles did to you, it feels wrong." You had never told Crocodile what the scar on your back was. It didn't feel like it mattered anymore.

"I think I'll feel better about this if I'm the one who kills you."

You knew this was coming. The second you saw him at the end of the alley. But you agreed with him. If you had to die at someone's hands, you would pick Crocodile over anyone else. Even if it meant he didn't feel the same about you, it didn't matter anymore. You were so tired.

It would be nice to see Roger again.

But then Rayleigh's face flashed in your mind. You still had to pay him a visit. You still had to visit Wano to see Oden. You wanted to see Shanks and Buggy find the One Piece.

You couldn't see Roger just yet.

So, in a sudden scramble, you turned around and ran.

The ground where you had been standing suddenly crumbled. You felt a gasp finally escape your lungs as you realized you almost gave up. But not yet. You had to save your crew too.

Then you finally ran out of luck. The dim light hid a hole in the cobblestones and you fell to the alley ground. You quickly twisted your body just in time to see Crocodile's scythe of sand arc straight towards you.

It hits you right in the chest, and crumbles to dust.

Confused, you run your hands through the sand that has landed on your lap. You're not cut in half - instead you just have sand all over you.

Crocodile change his mind? He was letting you go? Thoughts and heart still racing, you looked up at him.

Oh.

Oh no.

The horror on his face was plain to see - that was supposed to be a killing blow.

But he didn't hurt you.

Your hand jumped to your neck from when he grabbed you earlier. But in retrospect, you had just been shocked by the action, he hadn't harmed you.

Crocodile didn't hurt you.

No.

Crocodile couldn't hurt you.

Because he was your soulmate.

It was the look on his face that hurt you the most. The disgust, anger, horror - this man did not want a soulmate. He did not want you. So why bother sticking around?

You scrambled back to your feet. Even if he couldn't hurt you, the Marines still could.

So, with blurry eyes and a heavy heart, you ran away.

Faintly, you heard a painfully familiar voice call your name, but then all that was left was the wind as you ran.

pt. 2 (if you want, but this might be better as a one shot)

[magpiefngrl]

Can I ask your top 10 fav fics ever (from any fandom, if you don't mind)?

Also, just curious, is there a story behind your name "magpiefngrl"?

Hey, anon!

Oh fave fics! I love talking about fics and books, though I feel I talk about fics everyone knows and have nothing new to offer, esp since I've not read much in the last 2-3 years. Still, narrowing it down to 10 is super hard, so I've looked at my bookmarks and chose the ten fics that I've reread the most.

1. Bound Skerry by Frayach (drarry, M, 2.3k)

I've read this a hundred times and I'll keep coming back to it. Possibly my most read fic. The reason it's one of my Forever Fics is the prose. Absolutely stunning writing.

2. House Proud by astolat (drarry, M, 23k)

The original House Magic fic and the best one. I particularly love the hints of dark faerie magic, the horror elements and the brilliant worldbuilding. Astolat's prose is super readable and the pacing is excellent.

3. with exactness grinds he all by thistle_verse (drarry, M, 6k)

An aching fic with beautiful, lyrical writing. I've reread this so many times.

4. Art in Life by northofallmusic (tofsla) (wangxian, T, 2k)

I feel I'm repeating myself but this has excellent prose and it's aching and tender and made me feel all the feels.

5. Out of the Dead Land by orphan account (stucky, M, 63k)

OK so this hasn't stood the test of time because I finished it a few days ago, but WOW. Absolutely brilliant. I'm not even a stucky fan or anything. But I kept thinking about it when I was doing other stuff and I set aside the books I was reading so as to finish this. Now it's days later and it's still on my mind. I can't remember the last time I had a book/fic hangover. A very angsty fic and a fantastic exploration of Bucky's trauma. This is by one of my top authors of all time, who's now orphaned everything.

6. Mr Webster's Wager by Fahye + orphan author (same one as above) (Ash/Webster, E, 27k)

Now we're getting into the horny fics. This one is based on a KJ Charles short story which is the best romance short story ever written in my not so humble opinion. This takes the original story and the horniness of that scene and expands it into many horny scenes. It's masterful, very very hot, and just a fantastic fic.

7. Unhook the Stars by jad (drarry, E, 70k)

One of the first drarry fics I read and one that made a huge impression on me. Super kinky, lots of sex scenes, I've reread this a LOT.

8. IDK My BFF Hermione? by lettered (drarry, E, 19k)

Extraordinary. Phenomenal. It will always have a place in my Top 10. Also, very filthy, which is a huge plus in my book.

9. a better happier st sebastian by halsinator (Jonathan Strange, E, 6k)

Another one I reread a million times. Stunning prose and vibes and beautiful yearning. I keep coming back to it.

10. live from new york by varnes (wangxian, E, 87k)

A masterpiece, a classic of wangxian, this is a Saturday Night Live AU, which is such a bizarre choice for an AU--and yet it works. I don't live in US, I have never watched SNL, but I adored the fic.

I've left out a ton of favourite works and authors I adore, but for more of my faves, my AO3 Bookmarks is the place to go.

I have to say, this exercise has been quite illuminating: I don't think I've ever had such a clear glimpse of what makes me tick. In short, sublime prose, an aching, yearning mood and/or filthy porn.

*****

As for my username, here's the story: I joined tumblr a gazillion years ago (way before I got into fandom) and my first blog (still exists: @magpie-x ) was mostly what you'd call an aesthetic blog. I'd reblog cool pics and quotes and occasionally post a personal post about my life. I named it magpie because it was a place where I collected everything shiny, like a magpie. I rarely used it after a while tbh. Years later I read The Raven Cycle and fell heads over heel with pynch and knew that the only place I'd find fans was tumblr. I got into the nascent TRC fandom and soon I needed a space exclusively for fannish posts. I created a sideblog called magpiefangirling and when I later got an AO3 account I shortened the name. Years later I got into drarry, I became very active on tumblr again, and the sideblog wasn't enough so I deleted it and created a brand new blog with my AO3 name.

In short, magpiefngrl, means magpie being a fangirl. It was a random decision but it has now shaped me and I think of myself as Magpie in fandom spaces, and even chose that as my pen name for my future original romance books.

[toxicanonymity]

BLOG FAQs

WELCOME ABOARD! This blog has amazing readers which makes it a lot of fun. Check your content settings to make sure you can see everything. Heed warnings on fics. UPDATED 4/30/24.

blog header pic from brontesummerfeld

Basics

Tox/Toxy, she/her. millennial. Blog is 18+. You can talk to me in English or Spanish.

As of 5/31/24 all WIPs are on hiatus.

Do not copy, translate, or repost* my work. Do not put it into AI or make bots of it. Ty for understanding.

*reblogging ( 🔁 button) is encouraged.

Q: Are Requests open?

A: no, not for new fics. but feel free to send thots, particularly on my stories. if I use it I'll tag you. you can also ask Qs about lore, etc.

Q: Will you write more every inch/left in Lincoln?

A: I plan to. More here. For Every Inch, there are three more parts planned.

Q: When is [fic] coming back? How many chapters?

A: IDK, sorry. If I knew I'd tell you. I have to delete asks like this for my sanity. I get overwhelmed. In the future, I'm not planning to release things as I write, I'm gonna try to finish everything before posting. Problem is I have a lot of one shot fails / play as I go AUs. We'll see. I can tell you Every Inch has 6 total parts.

Q: Did you read my fic?

A: I'm sure it's good but I'm a slow/bad reader. I'm also overdosed on pedro rn. More here.

Q: AO3

A: Here, not everything is on there but lmk if there's something you'd like me to prioritize as I work on bringing everything over.

Q: Tag list?

A: Please follow @toxicfics, use the person icon to turn on notifications, and use this trick for getting a tab on your dashboard just for your blog subscriptions so you can see what you missed.

Q: Are the fics always dark on this blog?

A: No.

Q: What is the brothel?

A: I HC my characters as living in my brothel which has its own crack sideblog @toxicbrothel and tv show.

Q: What are Joelkémons?

A: Reader-coined term for the Joel variants on this blog. Some listed here: Joelkémon cards.

Q: Can we make your characters into bots?

A: No, please don't do this. It makes me feel bad and they don't even work. Every time it puts me farther away from updating the fic. Please. o not copy, repost, translate, put in IA, or make bots of my work. Please lmk if you ever see my work made into a bot, copied, etc.

Q: Who's night walks!Joel? Who's thighs out?

A: Night Walks is an AU where Joel is your hot, older, creepy pothead neighbor. Night walks masterlist. Thighs out (another AU) is your boyfriend's hot slutty dad.

Q: What's a HOG? Who/what is GILF?

A: Hot Old Guy, from Silence can never be bought pt. 2 and 5. GILF is grandpa I'd Like to Fuck and may refer to the one from Pawn Shop (Joel in his 60s) @gilfjoel.

Q: Who is Dr. Rock?

A: Hot sex therapist who roleplays my characters. Dr. Rock is also the poster boy for avoiding discourse.

Q: Do you still write slashers?

A: Yes. I just wrote my first Thomas Hewitt in March 2024. Main/slashers masterlist.

Q: What other fics & blogs do you rec?

A: Please check out @toxicrecs

Q: How can I stay motivated to write without getting a lot of notes?

A: Please see these posts: here and here.

Q: Why did you unfollow me?

A: As a Tumblr noob, I followed accts all willy nilly--i was impatient to diversify my dash by account. But now I want it more diverse by fandom too. I recently put my dash in chronological mode and began seeing a lot more of some people. If we've never interacted, I don't want to feel like a lurker. Or I could've lost (some or all) interest in your fandom. Or I may have forgotten why I followed you, especially if what you're posting has changed. Or I might be wanting to reduce the discourse I see. Or it could be be something like what's described below that I don't want to see.

✨Q: Am I blocked? Why can't I see your main blog from my account? / Did you soft block me? What is going on?

⚠️ A: The most common reasons I block are for policing or judging what others post, kink shaming, or spreading harmful rumors. ⚠️

When it comes to rumors and shaming, silence is not a sign of guilt or agreement. It's confidence in the truth and desire to keep harmful takes off the dash. As a rule, I would ignore and block false accusations, rumors, or kink shamers instead of giving them a huge audience by responding or addressing it.

Harmful takes in the wild / targeted harassment: blocked. And if a post is bad enough--such as calling for targeted harassment of writers or trivializing a serious crime by casually accusing writers of it, I may block people for positively interacting with it. I don't want to be on your dash if you share those views, even if it's about som thing I don't write. On my blog, it's important for readers to understand fiction can't be equated with real life. And who's to say I won't offend or traumatize you on a different topic one day? It's for your own good.

You can get blocked on anon too.

[throughtrialbyfire]

20 Questions for Writers

thank you so much to @wispstalk and @dirty-bosmer for tagging me!! <3

gonna tag @mareenavee @changelingsandothernonsense @thequeenofthewinter @skyrim-forever @trickstarbrave @oblivions-dawn @orfeoarte @gilgamish @totally-not-deacon @archangelsunited !! no pressure as always, and if i havent tagged you and you wanna do this, go ahead and say that i did, i'm tagging you in my mind <33

answering under the read more!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

five atm! but i'm planning on splitting my one-shot-as-chapters fic into individual fics. i think i'll have around 11, then, if i don't take out some.

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

99,173

3. What fandoms do you write for?

TES and CoD Zombies! though i don't write a lot for CoD Zombies, just when i get in a certain mood for it here and there. old special interest wont grant me a moments peace lmao

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

i only have five uploaded, but i'll put them here!

1. An Inner Sanctity - 41 2. If By Sun and Moon I Swore - 38 3. Cycle of the Serpent - 23 4. The Mark You Left - 15 5. Portraits Under Forgotten Suns - 2 (this is the one i'm gonna split up into their own fics :3)

5. Do you respond to comments?

yes!! i even carry on convos in the comments sometimes for the hell of it, i love interacting with ppl <33333333

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

i think the one-shot for the prompts "forgotten/devotion" for tesfest '23 about the shipwreck of the brinehammer, since the main character dies lmao

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

the one for the prompt "in bloom" from tesfest '23!! it was just a little fluff fic for my ocs athenath and ja'dato <3

8. Do you get hate on fics?

luckily no, the spaces i've found myself in these days are really positive :3 especially compared to when i wrote on FF.net in like 2009

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

none of it is published, but i do sometimes! it's a good way to flex my muscles (haha) in blending thought and action, balancing descriptors (how vivid is Too Much), and seeing how certain characters interact with each other in a vulnerable state. maybe i'll post some someday, idk. mostly i just do it for funsies, so idk what kind you'd classify any of mine.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

i havent in many years, so no, but that could chance if the mood strikes me

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

nope, but when i was writing for a different fandom in high school, my writing for a particular character wound up on ppls RP accounts as their versions backstory, as well.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

no, but if anyone wants to translate my fics, feel free!! just give me a heads-up!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic?

yep, on my old ao3, a good friend and i turned an RP into a fic! i enjoyed it immensely bc we wrote really well together!

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

idk, i just groove where the dynamics take me <3

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

i hate to say it, but An Inner Sanctity needs a major overhaul that i don't have the energy for right now. when i started writing that fic, i didn't have a solid grasp on athenath's personality. now that i do, i'm gonna need to rewrite all the chapters i've had ready for it, and pivot the direction of the fic to get it where i wanted it to wind up eventually. i really do want to finish it, though.

16. What are your writing strengths?

i get a lot of compliments on my imagery/descriptions/atmosphere! i love describing shit, so i'm glad ppl enjoy reading those bits of my work <3 oh!! and character/narrative details. i wrote a ~180k word fic in my senior year of high school solely off my mental notes for it, and it still wasnt finished when i dropped it a year or so later due to Circumstances

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

biting off WAAAAAAAY more than i can chew!! i have so, so many things planned for CotS and who knows if those things will get picked up on by folks or even work later down the line. GAHH

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

if you can realistically do it, go for it. if i could fluently speak all the languages i've tried to teach myself, i'd probably include them in fics where they would fit!

19. First fandom you wrote for?

naruto, i was writing naruto fics on a defunct dress-up site when i was a kid AHAH.

20. Favorite fic you've written?

Cycle of the Serpent. theres seldom a time i'm not thinking about those elves. yes, i will admit with my whole chest that i'm a tad desperate for people to read it and interact with it, but i think if i could explain everything (without spoiling it obviously) i have planned for this fic and just how much is going on in the background of the details i throw in, the reasons certain characters behave the way they do, and the amount of time i've spent working on it (the doc for it is at roughly ~96k and we're not even at the Real beginning of the solitude arc) and the sheer amount of hours i've spent making sure details line up, you'd understand why i'm losing all my sanity daniel-amnesia-the-dark-descent style over this story. i started writing it as a for fun "no one's ever gonna see this" exercise that also helped me greatly in recovering from long covid brainfog, and i think even if one day i look back and think of it as "not the best thing i've ever written", it'll still be one of the most passion-driven things i've ever written, and i'm happy about that. <3

woof, what a ramble. if you made it to the end of this, thank you, and i hope you're having a good day!!

[matchstickdolly]

So long, farewell! 💜 I won't be posting from this account anymore. To close it out, here is a roundup of my Lucifer fan works, as I think that's how most came to find me here.

You will need an AO3 account to read most of my stories; it's relatively easy to sign up if you don't have one. Though I'm gone from here and elsewhere in the Lucifer fandom, I will continue to read comments and attempt to reply to them, so please consider sharing these fics and commenting your thoughts on AO3!

LONG READS (20,000+ words)

A Refraction of Light

314k words. My giant post-S3 canon divergence that spans Earth, Hell, and Heaven. If you didn't like Lucifer's Netflix era (the last three seasons) or wished there were more power couple vibes for Deckerstar, you might enjoy AROL. Though I finished it in 2020, after S4 had aired, I think it works quite well as a S4-S6 fix-it for those who'd like one.

In Sorrow Thou Shalt Bring Forth Children

210k words. The 50 female-focused "blip" years Lucifer's finale conveniently left out, also several post-S6 chapters. Heavy angst surrounding family and spiritual trauma but aims to be cathartic by acknowledging pain. All that said, more humor and Deckerstar than you'd probably expect, given the CW tags.

Reins Series: Try My Reins and My Heart & As Certain Dark Things Are to Be Loved

35k words when read together. Porn with feelings/plot. Fun, sweet kinkiness that should be read in order. Dominant!Lucifer because I struggle to see the Devil otherwise and because Chloe deserves a fucking break in the care of her sex god beau.

In a Similar Vein

21k words. Funny, sweet, and absurd S1 divergence wherein Chloe becomes (very wrongly) convinced that Lucifer is a vampire. Alas, it is missing the last chapter.

Chloe KNOWS

20k words. Funny, sweet, sexy S2 divergence in which Chloe accidentally gets a devil reveal when she stumbles upon an ageless Lucifer in vintage pornography. Oops.

MEDIUM READS (5,000 to 20,000 words)

If the Shoe Fits & In the Family Way

14k words when read together. Alternate post-5B/S6. Feel-good, funny, fluffy, even sexy. Godifer and Mrs. G being good partners, parents, and Improvers of the Universe. If you need a sweet, positive fix-it for the end of Lucifer, these fics might fit the bill.

Rebound to You

12k words. Feel-good, funny, sexy AU where Lucifer is still the Devil, but he and Chloe didn't meet as in canon. Instead, they meet a couple of years later, after Lucifer has naturally gotten a phone and Chloe has divorced Dan and is now resorting to dating apps to meet people. Features a fun gimmick of Tinder-like chat logs (used sparingly, I promise).

Something More & Pump It Up

11k words when read together. These two canon compliant fics won't seem like they go together at first, but I promise they do (thematically). Both are pre-canon and about the subtle ways in which Lucifer and Chloe are an amusingly great match. They just haven't met (yet) to know it! The first story is sweet and about Jed and Chloe's relationship; basically a character study of Chloe as told from Jed's POV. The second is a bit of a sex farce about Lucifer watching Hot Tub High School after settling in L.A., but it's also porn with plot or at least a character study.

Not to Mii

10k words. Lucifer sticks around at the end of S3's "The Last Heartbreak." One thing leads to another, and you get strip Mario Kart. I promise it works.

The Fine Line Between Desire and Fear

10k words. Feel-good and silly post-5A divergence featuring a haunted mansion on Halloween. Almost solely Deckerstar-focused but also imagines a future where Michael is trying to redeem himself and earn Ella's affection; the only problem is that he's afraid...of a lot, actually. The irony!

Sweet and Sour

10k words. A comical Michael/Ella fic based on the 5A trailer. Turned out to be rather in-character for many aspects of Michael, so it holds up, I think.

Now That's What I Call Big Devil Energy! Series: Big Devil Energy & Satan's Got a Heart On

9k words when read together. Funny, sweet chaos. Lucifer being a completely over-the-top Devil in love.

All You Can Play

9k words but really more like 3k if you want the finished part of the fic. (First chapter can stand alone; don’t read past it if you don’t like unfinished work.) Chaotic humor, sex farce. Canon compliant missing scene wherein I will tell you not to hate the player (me) but the game (S3). The reason Lucifer isn't there to protect Chloe at the end of 03x04? He's with Lexy, the judge's soon-to-be ex-wife. This is that story. Featuring Chuck E. Cheese.

Bound by Iniquity

8k words. Dark 5A canon divergence from Maze's POV. Her dirty dealmaking with Michael backfires, big time.

Get Thee Behind Me

7k words. Porn with plot/feelings. Lucifer and Chloe try anal sex for the first time. Feel-good comedy ensues.

Baptized by Desire

7k words. Dark but sweet S3 divergence. Lucifer comes to believe he really is a delusional human while he's in the psychiatric hospital in "God Johnson."

Hells to Betsy

6k words. Answering the question of how Chloe afforded a large three-bedroom townhouse in L.A., especially once Maze moved out. Come on! Detectives are paid well but not that well!

Darkest Before Dawn

5k words. Sweet, funny, sexy wing fic. No wing oil, but there's a barrel of crude oil and Dawn dishwashing liquid. This is not an ad.

SHORT READS (<5,000 words)

The Dotted Line

4k words. Porn without plot. Lucifer is attracted to Chloe in anything, even undies from Target.

Checked Baggage

4k words. Porn with light plot. What if Chloe took up Jana's offer for a threesome, partly out of spite? Bisexual chaos that is still ultimately very much about Deckerstar.

Winging It & Made in His Image

4k words when read together. Both are chaotic sex farces that wax on about the Devil's dick. They must be read in order.

Reefer Gladness Series: Flying High & Baked with Love

3k words when together. Sweet fluff. Established Deckerstar getting high together.

Lunch at the Y

3k words. Porn without plot. Roughly set in a better post-5A world where Lucifer eats Chloe out in a dressing room because of course he would. That's a love language.

Those Who Favor Fire

2k words. Porn without plot. Roughly set in a better post-S3 world where Deckerstar have gotten their HEA and have been together for some ten years or so.

My God's House Has Many Rooms

2k words. S6's "happy" closeout is creepily vague to me. This story explores a horrific what-if.

Raising Hell

1k words. Porn without plot. An ode to the blowjob.

Use My Words Against Me

1k words. All dialogue, pure chaos. Caught up in yet another scandal, closeted Republican Senator Olin Graham asks the Devil for a favor. You'll only appreciate this if you know enough about American politics and aren't a fascist piece of shit. Sorry not sorry.

Earthly Delights on Borrowed Time

666 words. Post-S4 reimagining where Lucifer and Chloe are making things work.

The Perfect Help Meets

666 words. Dark, canon compliant one-shot about Lucifer's angst/depression as he tries to make things work with Eve, all while he's in love with Chloe.

Other Stuff

A softness came from the starlight and filled me full to the bone — Lucifer meets the comic A Softer World. Inspired by an old post by @casimania that can be found here.

General Fanvids — Deckerstar being painful and/or lovely, plus some Trixie because I love her character.

S6 Critical Fanvids — Just me making sense of S6's plot, which I cannot read as anything other than incredibly dark and anti-choice.

Crack Fanvids — Pure comedy and chaos.

Lucifer Season 6 Time Travel Visualizations — Lucifer S6 uses time travel without clearly laying out how it works. I made two visualizations to help explain the possibilities: one for the loop existing in a single timeline and another for the loop causing or being a part of many/parallel worlds.

Lucifer S6 Wiki — After Lucifer Season 5B and S6, I started digging into the writers’ interviews to understand what the hell had gone wrong. You'll find their answers to a lot of common S6 questions here. They’re real, er, interesting Hollywood folk, to say the least.

[ao3screenshotss]

if it's possible could you please rec your favourite bungou stray dogs fics??

OH MY GOD YES THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ASKING ABSOLUTELY I WILL

update now that i've finally finished compiling them: this was so fun to do but a nightmare to choose (there are too many good fics) - thank you so much anon for asking it was so nice to go through my bookmarks again!!! but these are only a few of some of my favourite bsd fics.

i've got 25 here (i'll need to put them underneath a read more it's so so long omg) but if you'd like anymore, my primary blog is the same as my ao3 username and i have a lot of bookmarks there!!! they're all wonderful and i'd recommend all of them. anyways, i hope you enjoy!!

(side note: i tried to post this before the latest and last bsd episode came out and i hope i made it just in time)

And if I'm blinded, will my eyes become the planets? by Yui_Kuromori (5k) - not rated

- I need to leave for a few weeks.

He tells the president in a particularly sunny afternoon. There, with the sunlight filtering through the window, the man’s hair seems to glow golden, and the lines on his face are even more pronounced. Atsushi swallows nervously and does his best not to back off. He looks up, and meets Fukuzawa’s somber eyes and feels a bit of sweat trickle down his neck.

The president sighs and closes his eyes for a second. Runs his hands through his hair, and Atsushi already feels bad about all the problems he’s causing the man. He’s about to apologize, really, when Fukuzawa pronounces tiredly.

- I understand.

They leave to get to know themselves.

( the soft whimsical road trip AU no one asked for)

I am genuinely so in love with this fic you don’t even understand - i find it really quiet and comforting. DEFINITELY underrated - it’s one of the fics i’ll always recommend

TIP: read in the middle of the night before you go to bed!! i’ve read it so many times and this personally was my favourite time to read it

yokohama bay hotel by spirallings (9k) - teen

Ryuunosuke started his channel, originally, as a means to make his sister smile and laugh when they lived in that oppressive house. It grew far beyond that and allowed them to escape, and now it's his means of income: but he has always kept a tight lid on his privacy, separating his personal life from the persona he puts on YouTube and social media accounts.

While struggling to come up with ideas, he clicks on a video on his recommended feed and it leads him to the work of a reclusive musician under the penname Byakko Chain. All Ryuunosuke knows about him at first is his singing voice, his hands, and his guitar.

And those walls come tumbling down.

this fic i think is one i didn't expect to love as much as i did - i actually just reread it, but the comment i wrote before was that i didn't remember what happened in the fic, i just clearly remember how much i loved it - the first half was amazing but it's definitely the second half that ties it altogether

also i think the way the author writes makes it so easy to imagine - like,, the imagery isn't overdone but you can kinda see what it's like and it's so sweet (it actually reminds me of one of my favourite study with me's set in yokohama - also a rec!!)

TIP: id just say somewhere quiet where you can listen to music - i could easily read it during the day but i just prefer comforting fics late at night cause they make me feel like when i wake up i can actually live out what happens in the fic (obviously i can't but it's nice to dream)

An Awkward Encounter by SapphireSunstone (4k) - teen

Imagine you're trying to leave your secret boyfriend's place only to be met with your co-worker who is also trying to leave his secret boyfriend's place and in the middle of arguing you see your secret boyfriend's co-worker and you see a glimpse of his secret-boyfriend.

OR

Chuuya and Akutagawa's walks of shame seem to follow a similar path.

fluff and crack, what else could you ask for? side note: it also reminded me of a post i saw a while back by @hoshiumiumi (please look at their latest poe art it’s so pretty!!)

TIP: no tip, read whenever!!! might smile though so don’t read in front of your parents/friends if they’re the type of people who ask ‘oh what are you smiling at? are you texting someone?’and you don’t wanna tell them that you read fanfic

Into Your World by leedonghyucks (110k) - teen

A case gone wrong had caused Atsushi and Akutagawa to be transported to an unknown universe set 200 years into the future, where Abilities (now known as Quirks) were as rampant as ever. The renowned new Double Black have faced many fearsome enemies but can they survive the trials and tribulations of hero high school?

Spoiler alert: Barely.

a bsd and bnha crossover!! i actually remember a few of my screenshots from this - it’s a bit long compared to my other recs so far but very good

TIP: DO NOT READ IF YOU HAVE HOMEWORK YOU WILL NOT STOP READING THIS

Plate :( by forest_raccoon (4k) - teen

It's an accident, for once. He was actually following the Official Household Chore Schedule and doing the dishes while Chuuya was out getting groceries. But one of the plates was slipperier than he expected, and as he attempted to dry it, it fumbled just enough out of his grip to crack against the countertop, chipping a bit off the edge.

It isn’t one of Chuuya’s fancy plates. Dazai is fairly certain that Chuuya has no particular attachment to this dish at all, actually. It’s plain white and utilitarian, part of a larger set.

So Dazai can’t explain why he’s frozen in place, rooted to the floor by some welling emotion he can’t quite pinpoint.

(Alternatively: local brilliant strategist has a slight meltdown over small uncontrollable part of everyday life)

by @sensitiveheartless!! a wonderful artist and author - definitely recommend reading other fics of theirs. this one hurt me but it was so good - they also made a comic/drawing for this!!

Interest Check by featherx (12k) - teen

“I read your work in the school paper!”

“O-Oh?” Poe fixes his posture a little, and resists the urge to straighten his ribbon. He knew he should’ve tied it a little tighter than he usually does this morning. “Er… W-What did you think?” If there’s anything he takes pride in, it’s his writing; most people are turned off easily by the horror themes he likes to use so much, but on the occasion someone does appreciate them, it gives him a feeling not unlike butterflies in his stomach. If Ranpo, of all people, is the latter…

“I figured out who the murderer was in two paragraphs,” Ranpo says, holding up two fingers, like he really needs to drive the nail in deeper.

—Or, Poe writes a whole musical in an effort to impress Ranpo.

this one i recently read and fell in love with it was so adorable!!! they're both ridiculous and i love them for it <333

life's like an hourglass, glued to the table by ephemerality (2k) - teen

Outside, there are sirens.

"I called the police," the helpful cashier announces from the storage room.

very hilarious - imagining what is going on in this fic may or may not make you wheeze - it definitely made me wheeze

playing the hero by FallenNiji (118k) - teen

“How’s U.A.? Does it live up to the general public’s expectations?” Ranpo, walking with his hands crossed behind his head, wondered.

“I literally witnessed an attempted murder, discrimination, bullying and experienced a Villain attack in the first month here, Ranpo-senpai,” Kyouka deadpanned.

“Is that a yes?”

(or: izumi kyouka, reformed assassin turned detective, infiltrates u.a. and more or less willingly surrounds herself with well-known pro-heroes and other such law-abiding citizens. what could possibly go wrong?)

i will admit that i can't remember much about this fic apart from i love the character interactions as well as the characterisations and i'm always looking forward to reading the new chapter - i've also posted a lot of screenshots from this fic if yall want like a taste or something

I Was Screaming Your Name Through The Radio by ElectricSplatter (256k) - mature

“Four months from now will be the seven year anniversary of when you and Osamu Dazai released your hugely successful first and only album Double Black and its diamond single Corruption. After performing with Dazai earlier this year, are you planning anything special to celebrate?”

“Corruption is insanely overrated, and I would prefer to never hear Dazai’s voice for the rest of my fucking life.”

i don't think i can bring myself to go through the pain this fic put me in again but it's really really popular for a very good reason - you definitely have to read it at least once

O expectations, stale and dismal airs, leave this body of mine! by aptlydapper (20k) - teen

Apparently, Chuuya has a signature(s).

Apparently, removing that signature(s) renders Chuuya basically unrecognizable.

Apparently, this works on everyone.

Chuuya would have liked to know this before getting accidentally recruited.

this one is WONDERFUL - i love the story in general it's such a cool concept and it's such a cool ada chuuya au - please read it at least once

love at first sight: coffee shop edition by setosdarkness (2k) - teen

Dazai and Chuuya get stuck in the rain, and end up sharing the only available table at a busy coffee shop.

[or, plot twists in my meet-cute coffee shop AU? it’s more likely than you think]

literally anything by setosdarkness is good - they're a complete icon - one of the backbones of the bsd fandom. i won't spoil it but it was very good - also recommend all 951 (!!!!!) fics of theirs

S(he) Came In Through the Bathroom Window by PocketsizedDinosaur (2k) - teen

Atsushi deals with Akutagawa's unusual (and inconvenient) habit of not using the door.

i don't really remember what happens in this fic but i remember loving it very much and that it also hurt me very much - double hit but perfect

360 degrees by setosdarkness (11k) - teen

Chuuya gets cursed by an Ability that forces him to eternally live out his biggest regret. Unlike the other victims who end up killing themselves or hurting others, Chuuya goes into a coma.

For his biggest regret is—

[groundhog day AU with a twist, where Chuuya relives the day Dazai leaves the Port Mafia over and over and over and over—]

OH MY GOD I LOVED THIS SO SO MUCH I READ IT LIKE A YEAR AGO BUT IT WAS SO GOOD

The Next Day by psychodaog (10k) - general

Atsushi wakes up in filthy rags and dried blood. He remembers the cage so vividly and it feels real.

It looks like the place he used to call "home".

(Atsushi travels back in time AU)

a WONDERFUL atsushi travels back in time au - i need to read more of these!! if anyone has some recs please send them in!!!

Striped by AliceinHyruleBastion (8k) - teen

Atsushi found his soulmate. No big deal. Until he comes into work one day with soulmarks on his face and the office demands an explanation.

SSKK soulmate AU shenanigans with a dash of battle, sass, and angst on the side!

sskk soulmate au!! so so wonderful - i also loved part 2

pull the trigger tighter and watch our distances explode by niwakaame (oolongteas) (8k) - teen

The world looks like a big spider's web, colorful, and bright and full of light.

In which Nakajima Atsushi sees the strings of fate, and beyond that.

i forgot to bookmark this and looked for it for AGES it was absolutely amazing i loved it

You're All I ever Wanted by iheartryuu (2k) - teen

“Chuuya,” Dazai mumbles, nudging the side of his face into his partner's neck. The redhead doesn’t move, doesn’t talk. He doesn’t make a single sound. He just needs this moment to last. He doesn’t want to face what will happen when he lets go and is forced to look into Dazai’s face.

“Chuuya.” Dazai speaks with a gentle voice. “Break my chains.” Chuuya shakes his head. He rests his forehead against Dazai’s shoulder. The brunette sighs, taking a gulp. His next words almost come out as a desperate whisper. “Break my chains so I can hug you back.”

Chuuya feels his throat tighten. He didn’t expect his partner to say that. So he shakes his head once again. His voice fans against Daza’s ear, sounding smooth. “If I let you hug me back, I don’t think I’d ever be able to let go.”

— aka, what should've happened when they met again for the first time in four years.

i think this nearly made me cry - or actually did - it was so so good

The Weretiger's New Houseguest by xxSoliusxx (31k) - teen

After a misunderstanding and surveillance tape proof, Akutagawa is faced with the daunting threat of the Port Mafia. He finds himself wounded in the pouring rain, standing on Atsushi's doorstep.

i only remember some parts of this very clearly but i remember it was all wonderful!!!

Dazai Undercover by Bibliophile109 (6k) - teen

“I thought the new employee was recommended by the Special Abilities Department,” Kunikida says weakly.

The man waves his hand carelessly. “Yes, yes, Father knows someone there, it’s all very convenient. Say, would you happen to know when the lunch break is?”

-

Dazai puts a bit more effort into hiding his Mafia background from the ADA, and ends up pretending to be a spoiled rich kid.

ABSOLUTELY HILARIOUS - I JUST REALISED I FORGOT TO SUBSCRIBE AND IT HAS NEW CHAPTERS IM GONNA READ IT THE SECOND I FINISH THIS LIST

to build a home by lonelydoctors (5k) - general

”You have got to stop looking so shocked every time I visit, Poe-kun,” Ranpo says with a grin.

“N–no, but…I thought–I guess I just–“ Poe takes a deep breath and starts again, “I thought the Agency is supposed to be on a work trip in Shinagawa today. How did you even get here by yourself?”

Ranpo straightens his posture and shrugs casually, “Why, I took the train of course, Poe-kun.”

“You what?”

this one was SO adorable - according to my bookmarks i wrote "my GOD they own MY ENTIRE HEART"

This Color Ain't It by justcallmedude (108k) - not rated

“President, I understand Tanizaki, but Kenji?” Kunikida looked about ready to snap his pen in half as he, along with most of the people in the room, stared at their head. “Kenji’s methods are anything but ideal for an undercover mission! Please reconsider!”

“It is true that Kenji’s way of handling cases is unusual,” Fukuzawa agreed. “However, it is because of his ability to talk to people that I feel comfortable assigning him as our undercover agent with Tanizaki.”

- - -

Kenji Miyazawa is the ADA's naive detective given his possibly most difficult task to date: infiltrate UA and find the student spy before the heroes become aware that there is a traitor amongst them.

earlier in this post i included a kyouka goes to ua au, this one's a kenji goes to ua au and i loved them both very much!! i love kenji's characterisation in this it's so cool

Kiss My Wounds by bloodyinspiring (62k) - teen

The mafioso inhaled deeply, chewing the inside of his lip as he formulated his thoughts together before speaking, and looked the detective in the eyes. Gin told him to go for it, and when push comes to shove, bribe the guy. But money might not fix this if he mortified himself for eternity to come when he uttered the words...

“Marry me.” ~

A lot can happen within the three months of summer... Some people get the dream job they wanted, some graduate from school, and maybe others take on a new hobby with all the excess downtime they received (or thrown in jail like Dazai).

In Atsushi's case, he didn't expect to be proposed into a fake marriage with the one and only: Akutagawa Ryuunosuke

(Occasionally on hiatus due to university but ongoing!)

THIS WAS SO GOOD OH MY GOD I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT TO SAY BUT IT'S DEFINITELY ONE OF MY FAVOURITES

pull out your pen and write down your memory by Seito (75k) - teen

Instantly three things occurred to Shirusu.

First, fuck, this was the world of Bungou Stray Dogs. Second, given the appearance of Dazai Osamu standing in front of her, she had landed some time relatively close to the Dark Era. And third, these words slipped out before she could stop them.

“You’re asking me out on a date?! But you don’t even like women?!” Shirusu blurted out.

And Dazai blinked back at her in surprise.

Ah fuck.

im a sucker for isekai sometimes and this is one of my favourite ones

ataraxis by lurochu (46k) - teen

For the first time in his life, Chuuya wished Dazai was there. With one touch, he could quiet Arahabaki and give Chuuya peace of mind, peace of mind that Chuuya desperately craved. But that bastard never was there when he needed him anyways.

Chuuya's slowly killing himself and Dazai's half to blame. (discontinued)

as you can see in the summary this one's unfortunately discontinued but i remember reading and loving this so much

All hail our lord and savior Chuuya Nakahara by BlowingYourMind

a series with just a lot of chuuya fics and they're all wonderful! my personal favourites are Let me help you - His dark eyes got a little lighter - Baby Executive - The worth of a subordinate in Chuuya Nakahara's eyes - Yokohama public High School- almost as crazy as their pep rallies - Learning experiences - Chuuya Nakahara's issue with Black Coffee - "You stole my wisdom?!", and Don't break the honeycomb. although these are just the ones that i've read recently or remember really well!! i think all of the fics in this series are worth reading

[mercurygray]

Fic writer interview

Thank you to @hesbuckcompton-baby for the tag!!

How many works do you have on AO3? 102, but I only started posting there in 2014. There is more fic dating back much farther on my ff.net account.

What’s your total AO3 word count? 1,035,887

What are your top 5 fics by kudos? The Darkening Sky - Band of Brothers She dealt her pretty words like blades - Little Women (2019) Waited for and Wanted - House of the Dragon More than a Team - Band of Brothers At Home, Alone - Prodigal Son

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? I do! The way I figure, you've taken the time to write me something (and not everyone does) and the least I can do is say thank you, and maybe weigh in with some extra piece of lore or process.

What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending? I never finished writing this ending, but one of my TURN fics, La Fille du Regiment, was going to end with my character Margaret Frances running away from the character who was in love with her. They met in the middle of a war, and he was married, and she just wasn't convinced that it was ever going to work in her favor. So she ran away, and quickly married someone else who'd expressed interest earlier in the story. (There was also the small matter of her getting pregnant, which changed the time-table some.) Margaret was going to meet her love interest again some thirty years later and have him realize that the man with her is, in fact, his son, whom he'd never known about.

What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending? A Rose Among the Briars is my big LOTR fic and I think really does have the happiest ending - Boromir doesn't die, gets married to a lovely woman, has kids, and lives happily ever after.

Do you write crossovers? I am a multi-verse madwoman. I love crossovers.

Have you ever received hate on a fic? YES. A Rose Among the Briars got some fun comments back in the day, including one particularly memorable comment from a woman who lambasted me for writing an OC who was younger than Boromir because 'he wouldn't go for that'.

Do you write smut? If so, what kind? When the mood strikes me! I've written a lot of M/F smut and a tiny taster of M/M/F throuple things.

Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not that I'm aware of?

Have you ever had a fic translated? Yes, I have! A Rose Among the Briars was translated into French (at least partially) by someone who just loved the story.

Have you ever co-written a fic before? I have! I used to do a lot of tag-team writing via instant messenger with several friends - they'd write a line, and you'd write a line back. It was a really, really interesting way to write and it sent scenes in very different and fun directions. Stopping to clarify things, or ask where they wanted something to go was really instructive.

What’s your all-time favorite ship? I think in terms of the volume of fic I wrote for them, my favorite ship has to be Emma Green and Henry Hopkins, from Mercy Street. I just really liked their character dynamic - he was the chaplain at a military hospital, trying to wrestle with past mistakes and what his role was in a war where he wasn't carrying a gun, and she was the privledged daughter of a wealthy slaveholder trying to find her place in a world that was changing all around her. Both of them had these really meaty moral storylines and there was just a lot of opportunity for poetry and scripture and longing glances and forbidden love and it was just really, really good.

What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will? I have this throuple thing I started writing for MOTA that will probably never see the light of day.

What are your writing strengths? People have told me recently that they really like my dialogue, and my ability to really capture canon character voices as true to form. I was also told I have an uncanny ability to introduce people and immediately make you care about them, which I'm pretty proud of.

What are your writing weaknesses? Keeping things short.

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic? I actually kind of like it! I speak a little bit of French, and some Italian, but I always try to check with a native speaker if I'm adding whole lines in a different language.

What was the first fandom you wrote for? Lord of the Rings. And that fic is still on ff.net if you want to go read it. I keep it there to keep me humble.

What’s a fandom/ship you haven’t written for yet but want to? I honestly can't think of one! Because I do so much shorter format stuff here on my tumblr, if I have an idea it usually ends up getting written!

What’s your favourite fic you’ve written? I am the most proud of The Darkening Sky. It was a three and a half year labor of love and far and away the most 'successful' thing I've ever written, but I gained so many new friends and people who just really loved the characters I created and I actually finished it! I'm notorious for not finishing big projects.

Tagging @mads-weasley, @latibvles, @basilone, @softguarnere, @softspeirs, @noneedtoamputate and anyone else who's writing fic for Masters of the Air right now!

[fountainpenguin]

Fanfic Schedule News - 2024

You can find this post later in my Pinned Post links

Overview

- Fairly OddParents - On hiatus while buffer building. Weekly Friday updates when ready, probably in summer. Origin and Knots are planned to alternate to show both sides of the war, but can be read independently. - WordGirl - On hiatus while buffer building. Weekly updates when ready, but lower priority than FOP. I'd like to post a few one-shots in spring and summer. - MCYT - Weekly Tuesday updates (Dog's Life until Chapter 30, then other 'fics while Dog's Life is on break). I'm also posting on Friday, but am moving towards posting on Sunday. - Total Drama - I'm not writing new content for the TD fandom, but I have 40+ 'fics I posted on FFN, but not AO3. Now that many are 10 years old, I'd like to archive some on AO3. - Every year I say I want to post my Mario drafts, but... I don't think 2024 will be that year. We will see.

Fandom-Specific Series

I post 'fics under my AO3 account, FountainPenguin.

If you'd like to get notifications for new works but don't want to follow me as a user, consider subscribing to some fandom-specific series:

Fairly OddParents

130 Station - All pieces in the 130 Reasons Why I'm Fairy Trash series.

These are further broken down into "Trains" (Ex: Main cast, Anti-Fairies, Pixies, shippy stuff, etc.) - Find info HERE

Notable pieces that are not 130 Prompts include Origin of the Pixies, Frayed Knots, Come What May, and Reedfilter Rules, which may be best subscribed to individually- They do not have a series at this time.

WordGirl

Heroes' Journey - Stuff about WordGirl and Huggy learning to share Fair City with Kid Math

28 Million Degrees - Character studies

MCYT - Not RPF, but the 4th Wall is very thin

Pixels Imperfect - Pixel people (who are all mob hybrids) live in a server hub and roleplay with their friends. Lots of interpersonal and social drama mixed with humor.

Neighborhood Watch AU - A serious take on the Life series lore and mechanics, ft. a semi-medieval world where the first 5 Life seasons take place in a single timeline.

Roundabout - Misc. MCYT content

These pages also have links to character relationship series.

Total Drama

Riddle's Drama - Total Drama 'fics I wrote 2013-2016.

These are also on my FFN, where I cross-post my FOP and WordGirl content as well.

-------

Fairly OddParents

I'm working on a buffer for Origin of the Pixies and Frayed Knots chapters so they can alternate during the war. At the moment I'm posting content for other fandoms, but once the buffer is ready, these will roll out weekly. Hopefully by summer.

- Origin is caught up and ready for the war meeting next chapter, so we're just wrapping up Anti-Cosmo's school and relationship drama in Knots :) - We're in the era of 2016 draft chapters, so it's a combo of "Lots of stuff is already written" and "Lots of stuff needs to be updated."

Origin and Knots will update on Fridays when the time is right (alternating weeks).

The 130 Prompts wrapped up Arc 2 in December and is on hiatus.

If you missed the Arc 2 finale, check out "Grudge"- It's about Happy Peppy Gary and Crocker striking a dangerous deal and I think it's cute :)

Ideally, I'd like to finish the whole Come What May draft before I post more chapters (so we don't have more of these long lurches between chapters), and Reedfilter Rules is in a similar boat.

Origin and Knots are my priority, but once Come What May starts, I'd like to do weekly or bi-weekly updates until it's done.

WordGirl

Factor It In - I'm very happy with how the story has come out so far. It's fully outlined, but this is a "serious and fluffy" story and I've been on a "silly and angsty" streak lately, so the mood isn't there.

- I'd like to circle back to it soon, but don't want to post more chapters until I have a nice buffer. - I'd like to post again in autumn 2024 and keep up weekly updates for several months. Origin and Knots are higher priority, but I really like this story and look forward to more.

I have some WordGirl one-shot drafts I've been sitting on for months. I haven't been satisfied with them enough to post, but you might see them soon as I finalize them. There's no schedule for these, but they include:

- Local alien girl is SO brave about Rex's problems while they lie in the grass discussing love and culture - Local alien boy loses his fawn spots, comes of age, and hits up Hal Hardbargain for alien-strength deodorant - Character study for Victor Best (My horrible son) - Character study for pre-series Rex living on Hexagon (My somehow more horrible son) - Other drafts from 2018 that need polish

I so desperately want to show the world my "Hopelessly romantic life planner since he was born" x "She can't commit to anything including this" marriage of convenience superhero drama... He's oblivious... She's dying inside... He is so embarrassing... Do u understand my vision?

MCYT

- Dog's Life Session 2 will end with Chapter 30. I've finished up to Chapter 28 and just need to tweak the remaining chapters. It will then be on hiatus for a few months while I work on the Session 3 buffer and other projects.

Edit - Session 2 will actually be 37 chapters, so another month

Expecting 4 to 5 months of hiatus from regular updates with some intermission chapters a few weeks apart (Full moon arc, my beloved). I have 'fics I look forward to posting (including new multi-chapters that already have nice buffers and will post weekly), so there will be plenty of MCYT content, but it seemed wise to leave Dog's Life on break to avoid burnout. I hope you enjoy these new stories! When Dog's Life returns, it'll be with weekly updates for several months as per usual :)

My "first half of 2024" goal is to close out as many of my existing MCYT multi-chapters as I can. Thank you for your patience with multi-chapters that have slow updates- I plan to finish them soon :)

I recently completed For Sale: Bird Wings (Never Worn) with weekly updates and am on track to finish One and a Half Birds with weekly Friday updates.

After this, I would like to finish the last 2 to 3 chapters of Criminal Experience (which has always had Friday updates as well). I don't want to post the next chapter until I nail down the story's end, so there's been a delay, but I'm glad I've wrapped up other multi-chapters and I look forward to finishing this soon.

After this, I plan to post MCYT content Tuesdays and Sundays, leaving Fridays for my other fandoms.

What's on Tuesdays?

At the moment, Dog's Life for 7 more weeks. Session 2 ends with Chapter 30 on April 9th.

Edit: Chapter 37 on May 28th

I've started new multi-chapters while chasing inspiration bursts, but I held back from posting them, so now I have buffers for those. I look forward to sharing them throughout 2024. Two notable ones are:

- Chalaza - Quick story about Martyn arriving in New Star Station. Bdubs voice study, some practice writing short scenes, and this is the story that helped me nail down pixel person anatomy. ^ Highlights include Bdubs trotting around with Martyn's dissolved soul in a fishbowl and regaling Etho with tales of how the Phantom Dragon carries phantom hybrids in her mouth. Also, Martyn hides under Etho's couch for 4 days. - Herobrine's Guide to the Between Dimension - A meta story about my Between lore, hybrid anatomy, and hybrid culture. No plot, but I think it's fun.

These are expected to post Tuesdays while Dog's Life is on break :)

What's on Sundays?

At the moment, nothing- I'm posting on Fridays (weekly updates to One and a Half Birds for the next several weeks).

I've also got a draft called "Scar's Castle" that's about Grian doing chores during 3rd Life... we'll see if that turns out nice.

Now that Secret Life is over, I've been able to do more worldbuilding and story planning for Neighborhood Watch AU. I plan to post some one-shots soon. Highlights include:

"Goodchild Oscar" - Oscar Goodchild's lovely parents put out a hit on his soulmate. He drags Grian around the Hearts Club Ball in his attempts to thwart it. Title's subject to change, but this is a fun one :) "They Never Found the Desert" - Local Green Life parrot can't get Red Life soulmate motivated for anything. Desperate times call for desperate measures. "Ethograms, Etho Slab, and Something About Ethics (Probably)" - Joel studies wolves... and the single(?) dad who keeps coming around with his kids.

I've also been working on the big multi-chapter for this universe, which centers around the Clocker family: Arsenic Waltz. It's fully outlined and I'm 5 chapters into the buffer, but it doesn't feel "fun" to read yet, so... Hmm.

- If anyone wants to beta read the first 10k words where Martyn arrives at the Clocker residence and meets his soulmate Cleo for the first time, lmk? Been struggling with the pacing of action vs. world lore for months and it'd be nice to get outside thoughts. - My plan was to start posting in April after Dog's Life ends, but it might need more time. With weekly updates, it should finish in December or January, but I'd like a nice buffer first. Possibly, this story will start in the summer and end in early 2025.

EDIT - I ended up killing all these darlings and moving them to a separate story, which will be released at a later time. The pacing was just not working :)

Additional multi-chapters to wrap up:

Closed Door Policy - Can't finish until Criminal Experience is done. Will post Tuesdays or Sundays as appropriate (Expecting 2 or 3 more chapters).

Dear Future Captain - Waiting for Dog's Life to catch up to this part of the timeline (Between Sessions 4 and 5?) - I like my draft for Chapter 3, but I'd rather wrap up other stories first.

With Acid In Your Eyes - Outlined and expecting 10 chapters. This is a high-tension story I was excited for, but it's on the backburner while finalizing lore, social dynamics, and plot points. It was ambitious to post this one before things were solid, but I look forward to returning when I'm ready :)

If you're interested in being a beta reader for any of my work, you can get in touch. I've not worked with beta readers in fanfic before, but if you're interested, we can talk about it!

Thanks for reading! Happy 2024!

[throwaway-yandere]

commissions are closed (slots: 2/2)

Hehe time to work ♡♡♡

Kofi link

Most information is in the picture!!! Here's some additional things I can't list in one PNG so please do read it!!!:

Commissioned works: (you'll notice why I said 1.5k+... Why do I keep writing much longer lol)

Saudade (Dimitri Blaiddyd/Reader)

Apotheosis Upon Your First Feast (Wanderer & Pantalone/Reader)

Q: How do I give you a plot description??? Help-

A: Doesn't have to be so specific. Honestly I love vague AF prompts. Just tell me what you want to see in a fic and go "ansy i want a yandere dainsleif fic so bad where he's a king and he falls in love with you amidst a battle" like first off anon, "same bestie", and also my friend you should play Fire Emblem: Three Houses.

Also, fair warning: I'd proooobably add some spices to your prompts. I got an anon request before that just asked for Ei taking away a reader's vision and I made it into a Shoguji fox!reader with Khaenri'ah plot elements.

Just like how Alhaitham values research autonomy, I have a thing for creative freedom too <3

Q: "Oh shucks I want to change the plot-"

A: As long as I haven't already started writing, do notify me. And as much as possible PLEASE give me all the details you want added and NOT added from the start. WARN ME IF YOU DON'T WANT A SUDDEN CANNIBAL!YANDERE PLOT TWIST- /hj

Q: Are you going to automatically post commissioned works on Tumblr & AO3?

A: Hmm hmm, sorry but I really want to post all the writings I do there… Dw, you can remain anonymous if you want. I just feel incredibly miserable whenever I don't post my works, especially if its finished ;;--;;. (I get sad whenever I remember my old enemies-to-lovers diluc x merc!reader fic who will never see the light of day.)

Q: Is it possible that you'd say "no" to my request?

A: Pats your shoulder It do be like that sometimes in life. If I feel like it's a super massive project, then yep. You'd get ur money back lmao

Q: Hey, can I make you write for a Canon Character x OC?

A: If you'd let me send you an Canon Character x OC copy then post a Reader Insert version, then sure!!!

Q: Is female/male reader okay?

A: Comrade I've always written things in "they/them" pronouns. At this point I believe I don't have a gender but for you bby I'd use whatever pronouns you identify with <33

Q: Are ships allowed?

A: Depends!!! Tell me what ship it is and let's see if I'm game!!!

Q: Is fluff allowed?

A: Are you sure… you trust me with fluff? Haha… Hahaha… It's allowed but are you sure you trust me wit- (if you make me write fluff, trust me, crack will somehow be added.)

Q: How about angst-

A: Y e s.

Q: How long would you take writing?

A: Depends if I'm busy with college or my health is acting up (I'd notify you right away abt this), my friend says "2 weeks to 4 months" is the most reasonable thing to say to this lmao but don't be surprised if its earlier than that.

Q: damm ansy this is expensive. $4 for a 1.5k yandere fic?

A: im sorry i just desperately want my husband dainsleif to come home some day… i need the welkin...

Q: You're new to this, aren't you? Why did you only list two fandoms?

A: Yep. And I only listed 2 cause Three Houses and Genshin are the only games I'm somewhat confident with my lore knowledge on lmao

Q: There's a question I didn't see answered in this description, Ansy.

A: Whoops, then please message my @throwaway-yandere account on tumblr!! I don't bite :D (or send anon asks at @faceless-ayato if you want to talk to the deranged yashiro commissioner. PS: he definitely bites.)

Q: "What am I, Mx. Ansy? Your mascot?"

A: You're… not? C'mon My Lord. You know you love talking to my anons.

Q: "…"

A: H-Hey hold on why are you holding the sereniteapot again-

[clanofjones]

Hiatus Update ^^

@theosb0rnway, @spicy-apple-pie, @finnstir, @kallmefren, @justamuppet, @mostlyvoid-partiallyturtles, @fanatess, @justletmereadmycomics, @thecranialbones, @alolaartista:

I'm officially back from my hiatus! You may have/probably noticed that I've still been active on Tumblr these past few days, and you'd be correct. My social battery has been NONEXISTENT, and I've been in a state of recovery, which is why I haven't sent this out earlier. Hiatus probably isn't the right word, but IDK *shrugs*

ME NEWS:

I will have to go on another similar break in the first week of October, and another in the last week of May. If you'd like to know then just message me, dw.

NOW, FOR STUFF (that I could probably message individual people for but I'm tired and we're mass posting ig)

tagging people who I know are co-creating or interested in certain projects of mine, but all (even those I didn't tag) to peruse my wares :)

Ghosts of Our Days- @theosb0rnway, @kallmefren, @justamuppet

Okay I'm actually proud of this one-

I MADE A SHORT ANIMATIC FOR GoOD!!

*dances*

BUT

It contains vague spoilers for an upcoming chapter so it's on the back burner for now. I am SO EXCITED for the masses to see this one! For such a short and, in the grand scheme of animations, unremarkable thing, it took about two months :/

SO CHERISH ITTTT

14, while on the way, is going to be a bit on account of many things. We've got lives, you've got lives, we chilling.

Of Mutants, Mystics, and Magic- @finnstir, @theosb0rnway

I do have an update in the making! Finn, you might wanna check out the AU acc for the newer updates, but no pressure! (AU acc is @of-mutants-mystics-and-magic for searching convenience :))

Cardinal Rules- @theosb0rnway, @fanatess, @thecranialbones

New updates for my second ROTTMNT fic are coming out on Ao3 and Tumblr this weekend! I'm trying a new update schedual where I finish one multichap fic and post the entirety of a solo-chapter fic at once. EX: I finish this one, and post a lil one-shot, that way when y'all finish a fic, there's going to be something else!

I'm hi-key really proud of this one, so YAY!!

MISC/Unnamed/TBD projects

@alolaartista, I'm making headway with that art I was telling you about, and I will message you it! I also have a written snippet to add to the pile-

@spicy-apple-pie- >:3

I am making YOU a *m y s t e r y t h i n g*

@... EVERYONE ELSE!

My 12!Rasey and Rise!Casey Jr stuff is my most popular stuff, and I approve of your tastes LOL

SO I'm going to be dropping another 12!Rasey ship dynamic + some Casey Jr art for the soul soon!

[splishsplashyouropinionistrash]

hey everyone, I'm still alive! and! I have a writing update!

I haven't done any writing.

okok that's not totally true, I've done bits and pieces since I published 'i still talk to you' (link here, I had fun with that one) but I'm nowhere close to having anything ready to publish. Still, I figured I'd give y'all a (totally sober, for once) update on where I'm at in the stories I've promised.

So, okay, the big one first: TMHYHM. I've got about 3k of chapter 9 done, so we're about halfway through it. I'm starting school again in a few days (senior year, woohoo) and I always seem to write better at school, so we're keeping our fingers crossed that it'll get done in the next few weeks. About ten days from now is the one year anniversary of me 1: starting my AO3 account and 2: publishing chapter one of TMHYHM which is.... both exciting and a little sad? Genuinely didn't expect this story to take so long, but here we are.

A lovely commenter pointed out that I must put a lot into each chapter, and I honestly hadn't really thought much about it but they're right. I'm not gonna ramble about it for much longer, but every chapter takes a lot of time and energy. There was the re-read I did to write down the main plot points I wanted to hit every chapter, and then scouring the internet for quotes to put in once I decided I wanted to go that direction, and then I re-read each individual chapter twice; the first time to get more specific with what happens each chapter, finding places to put extra scenes etc. and a second time to figure out a chapter title. Actually writing the chapters is a lot too. I put a lot of myself and my experience into my interpretation of Andrew, and I feel like it fleshes him out more, but it also makes these chapters so much more mentally draining to write. Anyway, all that to say: happy early birthday to TMHYHM and thank you all for your patience.

Okay anyway, some of you may remember that I started teasing a hospital/amnesia fic (here, here, and here) a month ago during the AO3 outage, and I've almost got three chapters finished (halfway done !) I decided a few months ago that I wasn't going to post multi-part fics until after they're finished from now on, so as soon as I finish the whole thing it'll be up. I took a break from it for a little while, but when I came back and read through it today I genuinely cried a little? I'm evil guys why do I write these things??

Third: the minyard triplets. I'm going to be so honest here, I have not made any progress since last time I updated yall. Looking back at the story, I'm honestly kinda starting to hate it? I don't know, I still like parts of it but it just doesn't feel anywhere close to being my best work. I'll keep working on it and hopefully finish it soon, but I don't know when it'll be done. I had thought about turning it into a series, but I'm just not sure how attainable that is anymore.

Also, you may or may not have read my last fic, but if you did: I'm working on an alternate ending!!! I can't say much (cause spoilers) but I'm working very hard on it so keep an eye out for that one. Not sure if it'll be a separate fic or just a second chapter, but it's coming.

ok uhhhhhh.... i think that's it? TLDR: I don't have a lot of answers for y'all, but I'm working on things.

Oh, also? I'm writing a book. So fics might go on the backburner for a little bit lol. Let me know if that's something you'd like to hear more about though, I'm super excited.

Thank you for all your love and support <3

[goddesspharo]

if i may: ✦ and ♡ [any fic you’d like]?

✦ what was your easiest fic to write & your hardest?

I'm going to go with the ao3 era because I'm definitely not looking through LJ. Although I will say I was certainly more prolific re: volume in those halcyon days, particularly for Gossip Girl and House (of all things!...as if I was not obsessed with that show for at least the first two seasons) - God, that perfect storm of excellence that the S2 finale with House getting shot leading to Cuddy and Wilson putting House in a Ketamine coma without his consent and then S3 beginning with him running??? CHEF'S KISS. Even though that show went batshit crazy later on, the mileage from some of those storylines was highway level. This show was at its best when everyone around House was doing ethically dubious things in an attempt to get him to stop doing ethically questionable things. 

But to answer the actual question: I almost never think any fic is easy while I'm writing it and questioning my decision to write anything at all, but some involve less hair pulling than others. There was a period after The Batman where I got into a nice little groove (after not writing any fic for a good five years, apparently) of feeling like the floodgates opened and I wanted to write tomes, which probably has more to do with loving Matt Reeves' distinctive Selina voice. (The effortless baby to this hot mess of a socially awkward dude she met four seconds ago works only because Zoe Kravitz has confidence for miles.) I think living in a rhythm where the minute's working overtime was relatively easy to write (and shorter after the two previous 10k+ fics I'd written) - it felt easy, breezy while I was writing it and I had a good time. 

I'm always inclined to say that the hardest fic is whatever I'm currently working on because it's not over, but in this case, I'm going with against the grain of dystopic claims. As a person who almost never posts WIPs, I'm not sure why I decided a Top Gun Maverick apocalypse AU was the perfect time to start, but I probably would've relegated it to languishing half-finished in my google docs if I hadn't posted it as a WIP so maybe past me knew the only way to get it done was to have external accountability? It was hard to write because I vaguely knew where I was going with it when I started writing it and then had to actually follow through with PLOT that made sense and couldn't go back and change things that I had previously set up. It did force me to make an outline for the current WIP just to avoid that JJ Abrams life, you know?

♡ pick a fic and I’ll pick a comment that made me really happy

Any time a person comments on fic, it makes me happy. There's nothing like that rush when you get one of those [AO3] comment e-mails because it makes you feel like you're not screaming into the void! Of course I agree with the adage that you should write for yourself, but you're also to an extent writing for others (or else you'd never post it, right?) so it's nice when you hear something back. Then it becomes a game of catch instead of throwing a baseball into a tornado and hoping that it'll return someday. I love when people leave lengthy comments with pull quotes and how things made them feel or why certain bits worked for them, but it's also really nice when you get a comment years later with people telling you they still love something you wrote. (Those comments where people are talking about re-reading your stuff? LOVELY.) All of this is a long-winded way to say that if you've ever commented on anything I've written, know that it has probably made me really happy even if it was a sentence. 

[ask me about fic!]

[thirstyforjaviersass]

His Smile | Chapter I

Summary: A very angsty fic, super angsty. It's sad, I teared up a bit writing this. A bit too much. This was one of the first Game of Thrones fics that I ever wrote a couple years ago, never got around to finishing it. Well now I will be so here it is. This fic is kinda about Robb Stark x Talisa. There is barely any Robb Stark x reader in here.. so... reader is so madly in love with the man but he gets swooped off his feet by little miss Talisa. It begins a little before the 'Red Wedding' where reader watches as their love falls deeply in love with another woman, reader watches as time goes on and as things slowly become madness. They watch Robb die at 'The Red Wedding'. So be prepared for the tears.

Warnings: Lots of angst, sad reader and stuff. Some spoilers are also in this post so if you haven't seen that much of GoT and don't wish to see any spoilers than I think it's best that you hop on to another location. lol Of course there isn't many spoilers as it is only chapter one.

A/N: Look... I really wanted to post a fanfic on here, I've always wanted to. I abandoned my Wattpad account and my AO3 account has been dead for a while. Now that I don't have a job anymore I have more time to post fanfic again. This is my first fanfic that I will ever post on here so I'm excited. So please, if you have anything in mind, let me know. Your thoughts on the fic? Suggestions, requests? Maybe even some constructive criticism. Go ahead!

There will be two or three parts to this, though it all depends if anyone ends up falling in love with the fic. I will make another chapter. Or if it gets more than ten notes, the more encouragement the better. My friend offered to edit any mistakes, so thanks to him it should look a lot better than it did previously! Thanks, bestie! ^^

Also Posted Here: Posted on my AO3, link is here: Clickie!

Word Count: 2677 Words

The smile he gave her and the way he touched her made it hard to watch. All this time you had been in love with him, it made you blind to the fact that he never once had a shred of an infatuation towards you. It was painful to watch their gentle, sweet interactions and how his eyes lit up every time he saw her. He loved her.. You could tell, he loved her and you hated it. Why did you have to love him so much?? The constant rejection you'd receive from him ever since he met her hurt so deeply. It hurt more than you could convey and all you did was watch…

Before he met her, you were happy, the constant flirting made you think he felt the same for you. You guessed you were wrong. He was only using you. That thought tore a hole straight through your heart. To think this kind, beautiful and understanding man could just use you…

You didn't think that you could ever forgive him. But then again, Robb was your friend, or at least you thought he was. Maybe he just needed someone to play with until he found another person to destroy entirely. 'That can't be right, he's nothing like that. He's so sweet, he always was. Maybe it's just me, maybe I'm the one playing with his emotions..' You thought, negative thoughts never letting up.

Thinking positive was all you could do, though that still didn't do a thing. It didn't heal your broken heart and it didn't make things easier.

"It has to be.. Why else would he be so distant…?" You spoke out loud, shaking your head while you attempted to mull over those sickening thoughts which had plagued your mind for so long. The jealousy in which you felt towards a woman you barely knew. The guilt which ate away at you when you thought about how kind she truly was. You would let out a sigh, defeated by your thoughts, only wishing to leave the training grounds to which you stood in as you watched the troops train with one another.

They seemed like they were doing well. Quite skilled to say the least. But you would shake your head, way off track. You had sighed once more, turning towards your tent, only to bump into the very people you didn't want to see in the slightest. "What are you talking about (y/n/n)?" You had gazed up at the voice of the man speaking, admiring the way the blue eyed man smiled. Admiring the way his lips formed into the most beautiful smile you eyes had ever seen. 

You gazed into his eyes, blue like the ocean. It reminded you of the thick waves which would cover anything in its wake. It reminded you of the scent, the calmness in which the beach had brought. You almost smiled at that, stopping before you even dared and shaking yourself out of your trance. 'Why must he call me that?? I don't want to hear it anymore!' The thought almost escapes your plump and almost swollen lips. The constant biting on your lips wasn't helpful, the stress far too much to bear.

You turn to his left and see that woman again, her eyes shining with curiosity. "Nothing, my lord.." You say. We were about to leave before you felt a slight tug on your wrist which made you cease movement. Not enough to hurt but enough to make you stop in your tracks. "I thought I told you not to call me that, (y/n/n)!" He giggled, making you cringe. 'Why must he continue to call me that?? Especially in her presence?' He frowned when he saw your face, removing his hand from your arm gently. The way he studied your face, the way his gaze had fallen once you made eye contact. 

It struck a blow to your heart, but you wouldn't have it - "Are you alright, (y/n/n)? You've been acting differently lately, more different than usual. Is something going on?" His gaze would return only to speak as if nothing had happened, as if this wasn't bothering him at all. You cringed again, turning around once more. You wanted to leave - You wanted to get away from this man as soon as possible. But your heart rate would quicken, the pain would only worsen once your eyes met with his once more.

Avoiding his gaze, you would reply simply. "I'm fine, I just wish to be alone, is all.." Your plea surprised him, but he nodded nonetheless. He acted as if nothing was wrong. It frustrated you greatly. You almost grumbled while you attempted to remain calm. "Alright, just please tell me if you need anything. I'm always here if you need me.." The sound of his slight disappointment shocked yet saddened you. You didn't expect to hear anything like that. 

Especially not now of all times. Especially since he acted as if nothing had happened... but you continued on either way, bowing before you would turn on your heel and head back to your tent. "Thank you, my lord.. Goodbye now." You replied, not even daring to show the slightest bit of emotion in fear of raising more questions. You made sure to keep your eyes away from him, walking towards your tent.

///

The look he gave you was almost heartbreaking, you hated making him feel that way or anything besides happiness. Robb's a great man, and you care for him. Seeing him with her just made your feelings worse. The heartache which tore at your heart was enough to strike you down as soon as you entered your tent. Talisa is sweet, you couldn't ask for someone else, especially when she makes him so happy and never hurts him or his feelings. But the pain which scoured throughout your heart made it difficult to breathe as you collapsed onto the ground, heart beating painfully and erratically.

You were barely able to sigh out, having lost so much air in that moment and feeling a slight tinge of regret as you thought of Robb's sad features. He seemed so sad, maybe he noticed something? Of course not. He was too naïve to notice when someone was suffering, let alone pay any mind. He may have been sweet, but that didn't mean he was very observant. Especially not in matters such as this.

////

You thought of the way Robb gazed at Talisa, the soft smile on his face whenever he saw her. You thought of the way that he held her, the way he would whisper sweet nothings into her ear. You imagined the way he once held you, the way he used to smile within your presence. The joy that once grazed at your heart each time you felt him near. The way your heart skipped a beat at even the thought of him. The way he once wrapped his arms around your waist. How he used to kiss your cheek lovingly. A frown would emerge from your face, a small tear sliding down your left cheek as you pictured his wonderful smile as he stood beside you.

You missed all the times you shared with one another - you missed the feeling of his arms around you, the thought would cause your hand to wrap tightly over the other as you attempted to drown out your thoughts by lifting your hand to take another swig at your wine. The sound of the music filled your ears, listening to the bards play peacefully…

But the sound of Lord Frey's voice would interrupt you from your final moments of calm. The sound of his voice was invasive, but you wouldn't let it show as you sat still in your seat beside Talisa. You thought it might be best to get to know Robb's new wife. They had gotten married some time ago. You watched the ceremony with a monotonous expression, almost no feelings towards the situation at all.

If anything, you were tired of crying - you were tired of constantly reminiscing on events that would never happen again, Robb found his happiness and all you could do was allow it to occur. There wasn't anything that you could do now or in that moment. You had spent that night drinking, consuming as much wine as your tired and weak mind could control. You had passed out in your tent early that morning, completely drained from the night previous.

Now you sat in the dining room of the Frey's dining hall, drunk and almost hopeless. You had heard the sound of Talisa's voice, turning her head away from Robb as she had just now focused on your behaviour. You seemed weak, unwell and it seemed to have worried her quite a bit, based on her facial features. Her mouth was situated in a frown, her eyes held something close to pity as she studied you. You were about to respond but the sound of skin on skin contact and the sound of Catelyn yelling out her son's name would distract you both as you turned to see what was happening.

The sudden ruckus had distracted you both long enough for a man to run up behind you and stab Talisa in the stomach - as if he had no heart whatsoever. The scene in front of you would cause you to gasp out, hands placed on your mouth as you froze for a moment. He stabbed her once - twice, three times before you were able to move from where you were and grab onto his arm with all your strength. "Y - you monster, how could you do such a thing??" You questioned. The man attempted to pull away, but your grip was strong enough to pull you both onto the ground as you got on top of him.

Arrows began flying as men's throats were slit left and right - you could hear Talisa cry out as she would attempt to pull her chair back. You rolled out of the way. Before long the chair would fall onto the man who stabbed her. Rushing to your feet, you ran to Talisa's side - but before you could reach her, Robb caught your line of sight.

You watched as multiple arrows pierced through him, a cry of fear escaped your throat, some tears would fall from your eyes as you moved to grab Talisa before she could fall onto the ground.

Your tears would fall as you slid down, onto your knees before Talisa. A pain exploded within your heart, watching the scene around you. All you could see was violence. Death… and the sounds of raw, unhinged screams. "Talisa - I'm so sorry... Please.. I beg you - " Your pained voice echoed throughout the hall, mostly hidden by all the screaming and groans of pain which echoed throughout the dining hall. From your peripheral vision, you could see Robb dragging himself towards Talisa, standing up for a moment once he was close enough and falling to his knees in front of her. 

His eyes were filled with black misery. You could see his tears forming, about to fall at any second. But it was too late, she was gone. She felt cold to the touch, her skin pale, eyes wide open like a bug dead on the floor.

You felt as Robb moved his hands towards her. A hand on her stomach as he lifted Talisa from your lap and moved her towards his own with the saddest gaze you had ever seen. You ignored the sounds of Lord Frey's voice, watching with tearful eyes as Robb gazed into Talisa's wide orbs.

You would jump once the sound of Lady Stark's voice filled the room, your gaze falling onto Robb's mother as she held a knife to some poor girl's throat. A bloodied hand would move to your mouth, a look of shock plastered on your features while you attempted to stifle your fear-filled breathing. "Let it end!" Catelyn shouted, her voice filled with anger and grief while her deranged eyes stared daggers into the proud lord's own.

Her voice was mostly drowned out by your overbearing mind while thoughts of fear, distress and even sadness filled your mind. You knew this wasn't likely to end well. That the King of the North was to likely die any time soon, along with yourself and everyone else. 

You were almost welcoming death in that moment, not necessarily afraid of your watery eyes landing onto Robb. Cateyn's voice was filled with desperation as she cried out for her son to get up from the floor, begging him to leave the room to escape. Tears had already slid down her pretty cheeks, a look of grief shared by you as you gazed sadly at the desperate mother before you.

"And why.. would I let him do that?" The Frey lord asked, what seemed like a sarcastic or puzzled tone as his gaze had moved to the screaming Lady Stark. She had turned to him, her gaze transfixed on him, dagger piercing deeper into her hostage's skin as she yelled out a response. "On my honour as a Tully..! On my honour as a Stark!" Lady Stark's gaze remained on Lord Frey, her tones were menacing, demanding even. She had a wild look about her, angry and yet grief struck at the scene around her.

You felt a lump in your throat, almost forcing yourself to swallow it in an attempt to conceal your undeniable sadness. Robb didn't seem to react to anything. It was as if he were frozen in time, lost in the gaze of his love, Talisa. An act that would surely be his downfall, you were certain of that. There was a look of fear in your eyes, expression still remained the same. A frown displayed on your face, eyes still as wide as Talisa's while you stared closely at Robb. 

"Let him Go! Or I'll cut your wife's throat!!" Catelyn threatened, voice willed with complete and utter rage. Her voice would ring through the bloodstained hall, brave as ever while she stood there, hand pulling the poor woman's hair back, her knife pressing harder into Frey’s wifes neck until a small trickle of blood leaked out.

Robb had stood up around that time, placing his deceased wife down as he called out to his mother. The Frey lords voice was ever so amused. 

You stared mindlessly at the ground in front of you, mind completely deserted from the goings on around you. Your heart was in pain, your mind could not take it any further. You had tuned out everything around you, not taking notice of the man standing behind you with a dagger ever so sharp. He had pulled you up, yanking you to your feet before laying a hand onto your left shoulder and pulling you into the blade he swung into your back. You let out a soft moan of pain, your vision darkening, one of the last things your eyes bare witness to was the figure of Robb turning towards you before falling to his knees.

Everything went dark - the sounds of fire drowning out any voices which you likely would have heard if you were still aware as to what may have been happening around you. All you could feel was your own blood pool around you once your body had hit the floor. The ground was hard, and it became increasingly difficult to breathe. 

You had let out some shaky breaths, your rapid heartbeat filling your ears, counting each beat before it finally stopped in its place. You no longer heard the sound of the fire, or the sounds of your beating heart. You could no longer feel the blood pouring around you and you could no longer feel your breath leave your lungs. Who knows where you were now, but surely it was a far better place than it was here. A bright light welcomed you, the sound of hurried footsteps filling your ears.

[hui-ing]

Fantasy friend here!! Hello and I hope that you've had a good day!

My favourite is the s ver. and the f ver., lots of trouble choosing between the two I tell you heh (while the 9 ver. is slowly creeping into my favourites too help). That's cool! I would buy albums too but... *sigh* friend, broke as one can be 😂😂

That's very cute! Although I didn't read the books, I've watched the movies multiple times, nothing fascinates me as much as watching Aslan guide the children, them growing up through the movies and their cousin go from immature to somewhat mature in one of them🐣🐔 It's pretty, the forest is damp from the rain now and it's dark but during the summer, foxes would be roaming outside! Not too many, just one and almost rare, if you watch out the window then maybe you could catch sight but otherwise not aha

Fair enough, I live in London! There's a heath, right behind my house with various trees (so they bloom at different times) which makes up for most of the scenery I can view ^.^ I'm curious where you are from too but it doesn't matter if you don't want to share~~

Damn!! I would not have the patience for a 10.7k fic but props to you, that was a lot of hard work and effort and as someone who loves long fics and is a writer unwilling to write some, I appreciate it 👑 More than 14k??? *gulps*, that's dangerous but very very cool my friend

Aeeee, I see that! Theories and stories in a music video always draw your attention but I feel like what keeps it is whether those clues are easy or analyse or not, some people like the challenge if it's difficult and some know it when they do ahsjahd. Digging deeper into the world of au's, I'm now curious to read your fics, they seem very interesting since you are passionate about lore (it's not hard to see why! they're beautiful). Ahahha I see what you mean, completing a long ass fic is hard but we move, it'll be done when it's done 🐣

I am, thank you and you too 💝

Hello! Sorry it took me so long to answer this, there's been a lot of stuff going on so I haven't had much time for tumblr besides the queued posts 😔

I'm hoping I can get my parents or siblings to buy me the sf9 album for my birthday (both sf9 and day6 are having comebacks on my birthday which is wild... at least people will know what to buy for me) but if they don't I'll be spending some of my birthday money on it - it won't be preorders at that point so it's all going to depend on how well I can convince them lol

Omg the scenery around your house sounds so lovely!!!! I live in California and it's all hot and dry here, but it cools off in the evenings so it's not as bad as it could be. Having foxes in the forest nearby must be so cool though... we just get possums and skunks in our backyard at night 😂 though there are squirrels and deer and things, and a few times we've been warned to stay inside because there was a mountain lion wandering around the area!

Yeah the longer fics can be difficult - I'm really bad at keeping my stories short so I have to be patient with myself when I lose inspiration and try to pick it back up again 😔 I've got a work in progress that's probably going to end up being the length of a full novel (200k or more) and I keep putting it off because I'm scared to work on it 😅 I really do love writing, and all the worldbuilding and character planning and plot-wrangling (and lore analysis, when applicable) that comes with it, though, so the pain is worth it to me haha

I'm a bit zombie-ish right now and I can't think of an interesting question to finish up, so I'll just say thank you and I hope you have a good day 💞

[sixstepsaway]

i don't even go here but i discovered your ofmd metas earlier today and i've been bingeing. i've got a fun hypothetical! You brought up how izzy's behaviour might change going into season 2 [no longer being comfortable calling Ed on his shit / doing his JOB] and i was wondering if you wanted to spitball ripple effects from that. how do people take that, best and worst case scenario? or even just go into more detail on izzy and trauma responses/triggers. love your stuff! <3

also have you got an a03? i keep finding fragments of work but i can't find a link D:

Oh man, if you love my stuff re: trauma responses and triggers you are going to love my AO3. My longest (unfinished, sadly, though I hope to go back to it soon, now I've found a bit of a groove with my writing) fic is a 86k trauma recovery fic for the Chinese drama The Untamed. My AO3 account is here and the fic with the trauma is 'rites of a widower'. I've received pretty high praise on that fic, actually, for my approach towards trauma, recovery and all of that. It does contain a tw of past sexual assault and violence though!

I'm hoping to post OFMD fic on there soon, I just don't want to commit to more unfinished works, so I'm planning to finish stuff before posting. I have one OFMD fluff on there though! And I'm going to be dumping some Izzy stuff on there soon.

Do you mean by "I don't even go here" that you don't even OFMD? Holy shit if so; high praise, thank you. Or did you mean Tumblr? Either way, thank you for the praise.

Okay, so, in response to your question: ripple effects.

Firstly, Izzy is now disabled. It might not be as bad as a peg leg or a hook for a hand, but it's still going to be a disability and as long as it's a recovering injury he's going to be a) in pain, b) having to tend it regularly, and c) relearning balance and walking and running with a missing toe. I said in response to a different anon that I don't see them going down the "it got infected" path, but that not being a plot doesn't mean it isn't a concern for Izzy-the-Person! It absolutely is! That toe (or, ehm, lack thereof) has to be kept clean, wrapped and protected from the dirt and grime of pirate life. It probably had to be cauterized, as they lack much in the way of medical treatment and idk what else they'd do, so that means there's also a burn to contend with. I might be off base there, though. As I've said before, I'm not a doctor, and I'll google some things but I'm a tad too anxiously nauseous tonight to google how bad a foot bleeds if you chop off the pinkie. (That said, if anyone has any information, please drop it in my ask or a reply or tag me in a post!)

I did google other things though, and google says that you can do just fine without your pinkie toe, but google is also referring to modern day people who have any shoes they need on hand, who have cars and the internet and hospitals. We're talking about a dude who is out on the ocean, cut off from anyone who could be a support system, stranded with the guy who did it to begin with, and having to tend his own wounds. He doesn't even have Roach on board. Ed made him strand the ship's surgeon right after he maimed him.

(Also, speaking of Roach, there is a line in 1x06 when Lucius has his infected finger, where they take Lucius to him for aid, and someone (Fang? Ivan? I don't recall and it isn't the focus here) says, "You're the ship's surgeon too? I thought you were the cook!"

To which Roach shrugs and responds, "Meat is meat."

And that. that right there. is what I call fucking amazing foreshadowing. Roach looking down at a soon-to-be amputated limb and saying, "Meat is meat," in relation to surgery and food. Fuck me.)

So whether it's fine and you'd be fine with a missing pinky or not, Izzy is going to have a lot of changes to adapt to, and he's absolutely not going to have time to be laid up with his foot elevated, or allowed to keep his feet away from the muck on the deck, or anything like that. Nope, he's expected to clean himself up and go find Edward, which is a cruelty in and of itself and implies this behavior will continue: it isn't just over because Ed cut off his toe, Izzy has to deal with it fast and quick, not lay there and cry with pain, and get on with it. There's a real lack of empathy there, like Ed switch-flipped any care for Izzy off (and yet, if that were truly the case, I don't think he would've reacted so strongly, and also I don't think he would've kept Izzy around at all. The point is almost that he cares too much for Izzy, which makes the whole thing even more toxic: "I love you so much I have to hurt you now").

All that to say that first off his behavior will have to change from the confidence he has in his fighting ability until this point. If he needs a cane to walk, then he no longer has both hands free to counterbalance his fencing, his fancy footwork will have to change (there's a lovely video of Con O'Neill practicing his fencing for the duel scene and so much of it is poised footwork). It means he'll be less willing to go into a fight, less willing to duel. He'll be more vulnerable to Jim and/or Frenchie if either of them decide to take him on to deal with what Ed did in basically kidnapping them and also trying to kill the rest of the group.

Then, when it comes to, like, the trauma of it all, I imagine he'll probably have nightmares? Ed broke into a place that was meant to be safe, bringing with him an absolute nightmarish scenario where Izzy woke up to agony and having a piece of himself removed and fed to him. I find it hard to believe he wouldn't have nightmares, and that's even if he sleeps at all after this? The phrase "Sleeping with one eye open" is something Izzy wasn't doing before, because no matter how he feels about the Muppet Comedy Land of the Revenge, he felt safe on that ship. He didn't expect anyone (let alone Ed) to break into his room and assault him.

I don't see him willingly sleeping for a while, and then that means sleep deprivation and that means slower reflexes, yet more vulnerability and less capacity to physically (and mentally) heal.

Another lovely anon suggested the idea of Izzy locking/barricading his door at night, which is a possibility, but as I said to that anon, I don't know if I think Izzy would feel that's an option? What would Ed have done instead if he hadn't managed to get into Izzy's cabin? How much worse could it be, if Ed decided to punish him again and couldn't get the door open? What would the fallout of trying to keep Ed out be?

I don't see Izzy eating or sleeping much for quite a while. Meat would be supremely off-putting, especially any meat with blood still in it. I imagine anything that goes crunch in his mouth would surely cause a trauma response as well, which leaves him with basically soggy porridge or whatever pirates might have. Bread, but crusts can be crunchy, especially if it's stale or older bread.

Which means we're left with food and sleep and his long-time companion all being a trigger. Since he's still in the trauma, he might not even register it until far later, so the triggers might creep up on him out of nowhere after a good chunk of time, maybe even years. If the show doesn't let him be traumatized and genuinely damaged by this, I will assume that's the angle they're going with: delayed response, once he's out of the situation (so, post-canon most likely), and so, probably, C-PTSD. There's no way that he and Ed can heal unless he's allowed to be fucking traumatized by what Ed did and Ed is made to face the god damn music about it and atone for his behavior.

This goes for stranding the crew on an island too, by the way, and killing Lucius (even if he survives the attempt). Ed needs to know he fucked it up and make amends for that. The crew should fear him. Lucius should no longer want to be alone in a room with him, let alone be on the same ship. The people he was praising a day earlier should no longer look at him with stars in their eyes. He should have to earn every last scrap of that back.

Scenarios! I imagine you mean in-world best/worst case scenarios (eg. worst case being "x dies" and best being "x is happy") rather than best/worst case scenarios for plots in the show, but I'm going to answer both.

In-World Best Case Scenario for Izzy:

This is as far as this kind of treatment goes. Ed sees it as "finished" because the punishment was meted out and Izzy has the time and space he needs to heal physically. Ed, at some point, is made to realize what he did, and is forced to atone and re-earn Izzy's trust once he knows he lost it. He manages, because he ends up being deserving of that trust.

Izzy isn't too traumatized because it's just the life of a pirate, isn't it? It's just A Bit Much and he handles it with grace and only minimal bitching.

In-World Worst Case Scenario for Izzy (and the one I prefer because I like watching characters heal, and they can't heal if they aren't hurt to begin with, and it would be a great plot and frankly I might write it):

Izzy is fucked up beyond all reason. He doesn't sleep, he doesn't eat. Fang comments on the fact his clothes look baggy (did he get new ones?) and Izzy flinches with one of Con O'Neill's excellent micro-expressions and then changes the subject.

Jim picks up on the fact Izzy got injured and Ed has gone off the rails. They're the one that also notices they haven't seen Izzy eat in a really long time. They bring him food. Izzy yells. Jim recognizes an angry shell protecting something very damaged and brings more food.

Eventually Jim gets Izzy to admit what happened and Izzy says that he deserved it for what he did. Jim is like, "The fuck did you do?" and Izzy, with complete seriousness, tells Jim exactly what he did to deserve the maiming.

And Jim is just like, "The fuck?" because someone murdered their entire family and left them an orphan and they gave that person a quick death at the end of a knife. Jim is not sadistic, and absolutely tells Izzy that yeah he said some stupid shit, but holy fuck Ed went on a killing and maiming spree because Izzy called him a namby-pamby pining after his boyfriend? What the fuck Edward?

Jim offers Izzy some more food and this time they offer him like, mushroom soup or something, something that's so bafflingly different to a toe that Izzy just starts wolfing it down and Jim produces some like, soggied bread or something, and Izzy eats that too.

Izzy still isn't sleeping though. He opens his door one morning and finds Jim asleep outside his door, leaning against it, on guard.

Izzy sleeps a little.

Ed meanwhile is still full Kraken and everyone is fucking terrified of him, except for Jim who thinks, at this point, that he's a git. Jim floats an idea one day while Izzy is eating another bowl of something non-meaty that maybe they should mutiny against Ed.

Izzy actually gives it a moment of thought before saying no. He's somewhat horrified at himself that he even considered it.

They argue back and forth and finally Jim is like, "For fuck's sake, he maimed you! Look at you! You're a fucking mess, how much do you even sleep? Fuck. We can't keep living like this."

Lingering loyalty and fear of "if you ever threaten me again, I'll feed you the rest" (and no, he doesn't know which voice is louder) means Izzy is absolutely not going to try and overthrow Ed and he's somewhat terrified they're even talking about it, but they hatch a plan to bring the ship somewhere they can leave or at least be on more even keel. Jim is thinking Stede but doesn't say that to Izzy.

Stede is brought in and he has the crew with him and probably Lucius, and when Ed sees Lucius alive he's like "holy fuck" and just shatters because he didn't want Lucius to die, it was just something that happened. He tells Stede all the horrible things he's being doing, including, "I cut off Izzy's toe!" and Stede is like, "Did he deserve it?" and Ed has to realize that no, nope, he did not, and when he tries to go talk to Izzy, Jim is bold and wonderful enough that they block his path, proving their dedication to protecting Izzy: Ed is not getting in that room.

Jim takes the place of Lucius in telling Ed exactly what he's done, though they don't get too into revealing Izzy's trauma. Ed spends a good chunk of time trying to figure out how to re-earn Izzy's trust and make amends for what he did.

Izzy remains traumatized, but once he's in a safer environment he starts to heal from it and be triggered less and less, and maybe manages to forgive and trust Ed again, one day. He never eats meat again and he's no longer really jealous of Stede; he doesn't want Ed in his bedroom anymore, after all.

Show Best Case Scenario:

What Ed did to Izzy (and everyone else) is treated with nothing less than the depth it deserves. Much like the toe scene is not played for laughs, and nor are any more of the Revenge scenes in 1x10 after Lucius is yeeted, what Ed does is treated with sobriety and respect. Izzy is allowed to have feelings about what was done to him, the show acknowledges and addresses that what Ed did is fucked up and Ed is forced by the narrative to see what he did and make amends. No one laughs at Izzy for what was done to him. They do not call him Izzy Limpy or mock him. They do not think he deserved it.

Show Worst Case Scenario:

Everyone thinks Izzy deserved it because he's a dick. It's played off as him getting his just desserts and isn't it funny that Izzy got maimed? Look, he's limping! Izzy Limpy now, instead of Izzy the Spewer haha!! The show focuses entirely (rather than partially, along with the crew and Izzy) on Lucius's murder, whether he survives it or not, and that's the amends that Ed has to make. Izzy stagnates by his side as though nothing ever happened. Sometimes Ed hurts him, but it's framed as something Izzy deserves.

I don't think that's the scenario we're going to get. In 1x06, Ed and Stede were both run through in two separate scenes, in fact Stede even gets skewered to the mast for hours and it's literally fine. No one ever mentions their stabbings again, it doesn't matter, it wasn't a big deal.

If they were going to do that with Izzy's toe, I think they wouldn't have had him limping with a cane, he would've just been fine immediately afterwards. Instead, he immediately has the marks of what Ed did to him:

This first scene is Izzy telling Ivan (who's just like "it's a lotta books, Izzy O.e chiiiiill") with a tang of panic to his voice to work faster because he thinks if they don't, he's going to get punished again. He also has a cane and he does this pained smile when he says "Blackbeard is himself again" and then screams, "QUICKER!!!!!!" in what I can only describe as terror and then limps out, having to use a cane to walk.

When he maroons them, he's still using the cane, and instead of having his foot out of sight below the wood of the rowboat, his injury is on full display. It isn't being immediately brushed aside.

And when he tells Ivan, "Rowwww," there's. something in his voice, I don't know. He's nervous. Who can blame him?

The last time we see him, he doesn't have the cane, I don't think, but he's also on steady footing and his legs are spread to aid his balance.

I do not think his injury will be shrugged off. I hope it won't be. But that's my 'worst case scenario'.

Finally, if they give it enough attention and dedication, Izzy being traumatized and afraid of Ed (his number one supporter, the guy always in his corner, his right hand) will absolutely have an affect on everyone. Even if the crew and Lucius are like, "Meh! We survived!" seeing Izzy flinch or be less confident around Ed will change how they relate to Ed as well.

In 1x04 when Ed is like, "It's a full moon!" and Izzy is the one that chimes in to say he's wrong, Lucius backs Izzy up. Lucius didn't have the guts to speak first and say it wasn't September 1st (who would want to tell Blackbeard he's wrong?!), but he did have the guts to support Izzy. Izzy opened that door by showing that he could inform Ed of his mistake.

Izzy not being able to correct Ed in that scene, for example, would mean they died. End of story. Show ends. They go right into the Spanish vessel because Ed got his dates wrong and no one corrected him, so he and Stede didn't go off to mope about death and Stede didn't mope about his wife and how he was meant to be a lighthouse for his family, and they didn't get the lighthouse idea. Because if they were fine, they didn't need the lighthouse idea.

Izzy saved their lives by telling Edward he was wrong and giving them the time they needed to come up with another plan. Izzy did that.

The ripple effect is that Ed will miss the minutiae and he will not have Izzy there to fix those things. You can, in fact, even see the beginnings of that in that episode via the way Ed doesn't talk to Izzy. He snags Stede, messes around, flirts with the crew, comments on the Bird Guy, tells Lucius to count because he knows the ship is coming, and doesn't tell Izzy the plan.

Izzy has to chase him around the ship, calling his name and trying to get him to come out of the (literal) closet he's in with Stede so they can do actual sailing and pirating things like getting out of dodge real fast, and then after their clothes swap he points out to Edward that Blackbeard needs to do something and Ed is just like "¯\_(ツ)_/¯ that's Blackbeard" and points at Stede

which is hilarious because it all works out, but oh my god, Edward?!

so Izzy is like, "Fucking FINE I'll see if this other bloody captain has a lick of sense!" and drags Stede off to go hey. what about you. do YOU have a fucking plan to SAVE OUR LIVES?

Which, Stede does not lol

and Stede is so busy going OMG ED THIS GUY IS SUCH A DICK! he doesn't realize Izzy is god damn right

and then after all of this, Ed flounces around and shows off like "look how smart I am, I saved our lives by seeing the clouds look like sausages, aren't i amazing" except had he told Izzy why the clouds mattered and his plan, Izzy would have said then and there that it wasn't a full moon and he would have said then and there that they needed a new plan, and they might actually have had time to come up with another plan without having to become a lighthouse (which was great, but a last ditch effort).

Ed doesn't tell Izzy shit and it's his always his god damn downfall.

His downfall is and has continued to be the entire show through: taking Izzy for granted and treating him poorly.

I hope this continues into seasons 2 and beyond.

Thanks for giving me questions to chew on for what feels like 6000 words. I'll do a word count in a second because I think I typed for two hours.