#i feel like he gets forgotten a lot bc hes in the early seasons and stuff but he was always memorable to me

[emperorcartagia]

hm

[okthatsgreat]

So how would your OCs fare in a different killing game setting than the game they're a part of, sure the killing game is the killing game no matter what, but a DR 1 style enclosed building is completely different from a DR 2 style sunny and beautiful island. I'm not exactly asking to put them in those specific killing games, just sort of putting them in different vibes.

OOOOOOOOOOOOO INTERESTING and yknow what im realising that i never really disclosed where dr:50 happens either so YIPPEEEEEE I GET TO TALK EVEN MORE !!!

for the 50th season of danganronpa they realllyyyyy wanted to hone in on the nostalgia, which means the location takes a lot of influence from the very first season!!!!!!! the group has been locked inside what THEY assume is some sort of weird boarding school/odd storage unit that has been boarded up to all hell with ZERO sunlight that isnt artificial. similar to thh areas continue to get unlocked as the killing game continues, but overall it is meant to invoke the same claustrophobic atmosphere as the first game, which REALLY influences quite a few of these people lol. not to mention that about halfway through the season (probably late chapter 3/early chapter 4, bc it definitely influences pippy to do what she does lmao) it's revealed they are WAYYYY underground in a survival bunker that has been abandoned and forgotten about (hence why everything is dusty as hell). catastrophe struck and the class is mostly presumed dead down there. also there is a single elevator but they are NOT getting to it unless they kill somebody

HOW THEY WOULD REACT TO A TOTAL SWITCH UP (FROM LEAST INFLUENCED TO MOST)

yoshito: i think regardless of location he would have the same attitude going into it!!! would it be NICE to send that man on an island vacation where he can run around at the beach with his friends? yes. but would it ultimately influence his "i can fix everybody" mentality? likely not

ryobe: similar to yoshito i think this guy gets fucked up regardless of where he's kept lmao!!!!!!!!!!!! the claustrophobia of the bunker ABSOLUTELYYY has some influence, it'll definitely get to ANYBODY after a while, but ryobe is very stubborn in his own escapism that i find it difficult to imagine he acts super differently in a sunny resort lol. he'd definitely be a lot more annoying with a water gun but he would still refuse to acknowledge reality and spiral regardless if he's sunburned or not

mika: i reckon there is a SLIGHTT difference with how she acts here!! not enough to drastically change her character arc, but i honestly think throwing her in a beach would make her a bit more friendly to start off with. when season 50 begins and they all meet each other, she is the FIRST to assume that they are at a hopes peak boarding school, meaning she has already boxed herself in as this ultimate lucky student with no talent in comparison to all of these talented people. a lot of the reason she is so standoffish originally comes from that immediate insecurity. i reckon if they met in a more relaxed setting where ultimate talents arent IMMEDIATELY relevant she'd be a little more open!!! of course there is no denying how they are all ultimates in some way or another but surely they arent here just to work on that right??? its VACATION TIME!!!!!!

erin: DEPENDSSS depends. she's going to act like pippy no matter where she is because like ryobe she is relentless. but that feeling of total claustrophobia in the bunker and complete isolation absolutely lent itself as motive for her. this is a girl whose entire life is dedicated to her work, and the bunker setting REALLY emphasizes just how completely separated from it she is!! it further tells her that HEY, EVERYBODY FORGOT ABOUT YOU IN THERE, and regardless of what her actual motive to kill ended up being that feeling absolutely contributed to the mania that led up to the murder in the first place. rp!pippy is a whole different story BUT HONESTLY it's a pretty good indicator that in a more open/less claustrophobic setting (since the rp took place at a camp, and while it WAS abandoned there was still the SUGGESTION of other people somewhere), plus with some close friends lol, erin could have reasonably survived!! throwing erin in a setting like that OR an sdr2 beach setting could help her quite a bit because it feels much less isolating if that makes sense. looking at the sky at least gives you a bit of hope that somebody else is looking up at the sky also. looking up at a bunker ceiling for weeks is going to make you irrational

rie: same with erin the idea of being completely isolated absolutely contributed to her entire facade crumbling in the later chapters. she misses her dad!!!!! and shes the primary caretaker for him so being locked away from him presumably forever hurts!!!!!!!!!! the bunker makes her feel completely alone and absolutely helpless, and is a big part as to why nobody trusts her in that final trial. trusting rie was IMPORTANTTT too, because if they had listened to her a bit more or even attempted to calm her down enough to get an alibi together they actually might have been able to get through chapter 5 lol, instead all of them had fallen into a rush of mania and exhaustion that led them to distrusting her wayyyy too easily. throw her on a beach and she'll be a litttleeee more chill i think, still VERY upset about her dad but maybe jusssttttttt calm enough to rationally talk things through. the isolation of the bunker is really good at making all of them feel very alone, which is why finding somebody to confide in was a tricky task (and then when she did find somebody to confide in they accused her of murder. lol). the beach might be a better setting at making friends!!!! maybe!!!!!!!!!

billie: the entire location billie was in was a constant and walking reminder of her father LMFAOOO, it was LITERALLY his own creation that she had been constantly testing for him. and BECAUSE she had done that so many times, she was immediately quite standoffish and awkward to the others, just because it felt very repetitive at that point. BUT ALSO i do think a big point of her character during the one and only chapter she survived was that she WANTED to help, mostly because she felt GUILTY. she felt that this simulation going haywire was partially her fault, because she recognized signs of malfunction and didnt run to stop it in time. in another location where she is less familiar of her surroundings and doesn't feel immediate responsibility, i reckon she'd be a lot less helpful LMAO. this is still billie so she is still going to be very easily influenced, but she'd be a lot less inclined to help and honestly might just hide away for a lonnggggg while. she would NOT fall for the note the way she had in the rp, which means lets give it up for wilhelmina "billie" lane for making it past chapter 1 WAHOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

sae: GET HER OUT OF THEREEEEEEE SHE NEEDS FRESH AIR SHE NEEDS THE OCEANNNNN. NO MORE CHLORINE-FILLED POOL NO MORE WEIRD HOTEL SMELL AND BLEACH. this resort she is currently in (in the rp!!) is kind of a mix of the bunker setting and the beach setting in that it is still isolated BUT she can at least SEE the outside. she can put her hand out there. its more taunting than anything but it COULD be so much worse

naomi: honestly she might be the most immediately and gravely affected by the location LMAO. this is a girl who is used to have places to RUNNN, and this bunker is allowing her NONE of that. she CAN not run away from these people, and the most she can do is hide, even though the entire cast knows that she is in her room. it is very very easy for her to grow extremely helpless in that location, because so much of her survival instincts is rooted in packing up and leaving!!! setting her in a beach gives her farrrr more freedom, and while that DOES mean we probably wont be seeing her until chapter 2 lmfao she is going to feel a lot more comfortable. it is still a very isolated island dont get me wrong, but it is a HUGE island, and naomi would feel far more inclined to meekly join in with the others now that she knows she has a surefire means of fucking off to the other side of the island should anything go absolutely haywire. HONESTLY would stop her from doing anything too rash. she is still remarkably paranoid but it is slightlyyyy easier to find lucidity on a beautiful island with a lot of open space rather than a dusty old bunker where everybody is cranky and the only enemies that know you are alive are currently trapped underground with you

andi: specifically made for the new waters retreat, would not exist in any other location

THANK YOUUUUUUUU SM AGAIN MWAH MWAH <3

[releasemefromthevoid]

MY ATLA LIVE ACTION S1E4 THOUGHTS

EP3 - EP5

Oh boy do I have things to say about this one.

Firstly, the way they wrapped things up from last episode was good enough, I guess. I think they might have tried to push too much into these two episodes this time, so hopefully they don’t bite off more than they can chew in the back half of the season. There’s something to be said about how early some plot lines seemed to get resolved and new ones were introduced, one even being more or less forgotten until the final few minutes of the episode, to make way for other story threads that just didn’t hold up to me. 

Next, I have problems with Bumi. I think with Aang’s new character arc, the themes with Bumi makes sense, and I understand its inclusion as a whole, but Bumi was NOT the vehicle to present that with. The correct mannerisms are there, but I’m just not buying him as Bumi. 

Lastly, there’s something that was partly introduced in this episode that has me concerned, which I will make clearer under the cut for spoilers, along with something that decidedly Wasn’t introduced. 

Overall, there’s some sense of disappointment around this episode for me, here’s to hoping it gets better.

Live reaction and spoilers under the cut

shit i lowkey forgot they arrested aang? too busy writing the last review ig

this dungeon visually kinda has ba sing se lake laogai vibes. could be cool to draw parallels in later season(s)

cell mate iroh lets goooo

i’m not entirely sure i like the inclusion of the mechanist at omashu. i feel like his motives for helping the fire nation are a lot less believable to me in this location, since omashu is a stronghold and bumi is No Pushover. then again, we don’t know that yet, bc bumi has Just been introduced. considering we cut to iroh talking about how omashu is so impressive. idk

Other than “it is I who owe him” about zuko, idk if iroh is really hitting for me. this is the first time this season where i’ve been like “yeah that’s iroh”. he’s just sort of uncanny iroh most of the time

BUMI TIME

bros asleep hahaha

bumi: “tea?” aang: “okay,,” the inflection on that was great. great delivery dfksjdh

oh we’re skipping the whole trials thing. i’m not angry about that, but Where is flopsy???

okay bumi is good. we love live action bumi in this house. 

jet jumpscare

hell yeah katara get his ass

so this choice for zuko to make is def a parallel to the winter solstice episode where iroh was captured, right? 

is bumi. angry at aang? that doesn’t feel right. i revise my earlier statement. his mannerisms are perfect, but blaming aang is Not bumi. this does Not vibe

SECRET TUNNEL GUYS?????? the guys are here what??? i wasn’t expecting them

that zolly shot though

please just stop talking and sing secret tunnel i need it so bad. i don’t even care that it’s a season early

THERE IT IS

omg i was right with the whole zuko winter solstice episode conflict. almost a one-to-one in visuals

bumi aang does not need this right now. i appreciate the rock candy growing crystals, but god. bumi is being so mean

i have to say, i like sokka being the one to figure out the cave of two lovers path. they seem to be highlighting his intelligence more overtly in a way the original show didn’t do until later in book one.

also liking the conflict between sokka and katara making a return. i knew that ended too fast during the jet arc.

so this is a scene where it’s nice to have the perspective of some random earth soldier from ba sing se, but iroh shouldn’t need this conversation. it might have been better to be given this explanation a different way? or i guess. it’s to give exposition about lu ten?? is that needed right now?  

loving the white mourning clothes. loving that not everyone is wearing them, too. it would have been really interesting if one of those people who wasn’t wearing white was ozai. a little visual conflict for those who happen to know the significance of the color. weird that we’re getting iroh backstory before zuko though

ohhhh leaves from the vine instrumental. good, good inclusion there. for people who know from the cartoon, that really elevates that moment, and for people who haven’t seen the cartoon, it might elevate a certain moment from tales of ba sing se later since the association is already there

okay so the crystals literally don’t matter, fuck me AND sokka i guess

i need bumi to stop actually

goddam, zuko, just yank that knife out why don’t you. no concern for blood loss then

WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT’S NOT ABOUT THE CRYSTALS. they sense feelings??? what do you mean 😭😭😭 what happened to earth sense

literally shut up bumi

this is not the wise old bumi that we know

thank you cabbage man, you really rounded out the episode

okay, i’m starting to see iroh. thank you.

also the leaves from the vine backing is still nice. it has the connotation of iroh claiming zuko as a son this scene in my mind

likes: environment design, visuals, the mechanist, leaves from the vine placement

worried about: the lack of introduction to the war balloons, the slight retconning of earth sense (what will this mean for toph in a potential season 2??), overlooking a perfect setup for a white lotus introduction

dislikes: bumi >:( (and he was most of the episode), changing the glowing crystals in the tunnel to be useless??

[thegeminisage]

tng update time. a day or more ??? ago i watched "the outrageous okona" in several bits and pieces, and then last night i caught "loud as a whisper."

the outrageous okona: this one is...fine? i think it seems better than it actually was due to being in the first two seasons in tng

i liked okona and i really liked the plot twist about him not actually doing any crimes whatsoever but instead playing messenger boy for his buds. that part was good. appearances deceiving etc, and he pulled a very clever stunt to get them to admit the truth. unfortunately by the time i started liking him the episode was over. so.

did NOT like the "data can't be funny" plot...like, he did define a joke in an earlier episode, and it frustrated me that he seemed to have forgotten the definition and NO ONE would explain it to him. they just kept going "you gotta feel it bro"

personally, i think if data was told the definition of a joke, and had the concept of comedic timing also explained to him, he could master the art of TELLING jokes, even if he himself never felt or even understood the urge to laugh. it's just ai learning. i guess in 87 they just hadn't conceived of it.

i did like the part where guinan was like just bc you cant laugh or make other people laugh doesnt mean you're not human...it was kind of the narrative to want to be accepting of his differences...but at the same time the whole premise felt so terribly unfair to him it's not enough to save it

also, the jerry lewis moment has uh...aged. a lot of those jokes aged

speaking of data, he had several good ace moments in this episode. "sexual attraction is not a part of my programming" and "i don't believe it's true that the act and emotion of love are the same thing" etc etc. i don't know if i believe in ace data because again you cannot be making the robots ace but i do deeply respect people who do and i'm happy for them that this was in this episode. if stuff like this keeps happening you could win me over maybe. MAYBE.

loud as a whisper: WWWWOW 10/10 EPISODE.......a rare win for early seasons tng......

first of all, that one guy speaking through those other people was COOL. like at first it was a bit creepy, are they his thralls or what, are they ok, why does he keep flirting with deanna in the workplace, but after it was explained that they were interpreters and after riva got angry that picard spoke to them instead of him it was like. YES. this is the shit. his interactions with deanna became a lot less skeevy once you realize his interest is genuine and benign and he's not some megalomaniac psychic nutjob

his conversation with geordi...like yes it's a little on the nose to be like "my disability is part of me and i like who i am so i like my disability" but this was 87. some people hadn't gotten it yet. i mean hell a lot of people still haven't yk

offering geordi a cure out of nowhere when they previously said it was impossible is wack BUT I DID REALLY LIKE that even though geordi's condition causes him chronic pain he still didn't leap at the chance to have his sight restored. like that's his way of existing and being alive and nobody would choose to change it on a dime unless it was causing them nothing but abject misery...like it's such a nice way to communicate that geordi values the different way in which he sees the world

not to be like sooo personal on a fucking tng liveblog post and definitely not to be like "being blind is exactly the same as x" bc it's absolutely not but things like being ace or having adhd/a multitude of other mental illnesses have caused me so much FUCKING grief over the years but if someone came along and offered to magically fix me like...it's such a fundamental part of Who I Am and how i experience being alive that if i was fixed i might not be me anymore and you can SEE THAT like you can quite literally see the gears turning in geordi's head and it's so fucking good. i love geordi so much he's my best friend

today i still have to do "the schizoid man" and "unnatural selection" hopefully before 730pm where we will finally do "a matter of honor" and "the measure of a man" together. AUGH

[woozi]

henlo yza beloved <33

oh my god <//3 love the way you put it honestly, the way you're so smart <3 the answer was right there and i managed to miss it 😭 i was lichrally like " ok so river dried up no thoughts head empty " and now it's as if the last missing puzzle piece finally fit itself in my mind jdjsksks that really explains whys and hows of haku ending up there, btw the importance of names and home in this movie was so heartwarming 🥺

also that's so sad to think about though, haku not having any place outside of the spirit world also means he might never get to meet chihiro 😭😭😭 ( unless he found a little something like home in chihiro ( yk home being a person instead of some house ) then idk he can become a water body anywhere she lives, if or when he decides on meeting her. like you know there is someone out there calling out his name or missing him which gives acknowledgement to his existence thus making a tiny place available somewhere where he is wanted even if as just a visiting guest) ok but honestly i'm also kind of okay with them never meeting hddjdj like even though it's sad there's still some kind of comfort in knowing the fact that some people only come into your life to help you grow in good way!/ intentionally or unintentionally helping e/o through tough times and then moving on )

also honestly same 😭😭😭🥺 i feel like we've been talking since ages, thank YOU for even taking out time to listen and reply to my nonsense fr, i'm so glad i sent that ask to tell you, your " im skydiving with vernon " tag was funny 😭🥺 i really enjoy talking to you

SPEAKING OF VERN how excited are you for his mixtape? would love to hear your thoughts!, i feel like he's gonna come out with some emo rock/grunge banger tbh, basing on the artwork and his love for avril lavigne songs hdjdjdkd whatever it is i know i'm gonna eat it up bc i live for his verses in hhu songs

hope you're doing well yza 🤍, and you too after 21st take some time out for yourself and recharge, you deserve it <333 love you 🥺 thank you for hanging out with me as always, bestie <333

(honestly had nothing extra to add 😭 dec is kicking me fr. days are just going by i have had no idea about which day it is this whole month 💀 also i haven't forgotten about the movie i'm gonna dm you details after i send this, feel free to check after 21st! )

MA CHERIEEEEEEEEEEEEE 😻😻😻😻

NAURRRRRRRRRRR i am not smart i'm just one for obsessing over details fjkfjdkfjdk AND I KNOW </3 it was such a good concept esp considering how our identities are so tied up with the names given to us by birth and the names with which we choose to present ourselves with!! AND UR MIND HELLO???????????? also agreed <33 i'm fine w the bittersweet ending (i… love them actually 😭)

ALSO PLS NOOOOOOOO i should be the one thanking u fr </3 lich rally where would i be without ur lil ask </3

AND URE SO REAL FOR THIS PLS FKJDFJFDJKFDJK i also find myself gravitating towards his verses we r besties fr 😋 and u r right once again omg it gave early 2000s <3 WHAT DO U FEEL ABT IT!!! i personally like the band ver more, it feels a lot more raw!! think the way mainstream kr companies (honestly cant be said for the indie ones theyre going IN on it there) produce rock music is so… tame for lack of better word, but the band ver ate fr tbh <33 IM KINDA SAD SOME OF THE SCENES OF HIM IN THE BLACK TANK TOP DIDNT SHOW UP ON THE MV THOUGH </3333333 HE LOOKED SO GOOD

i've been getting to rest a bit until i received an e-mail from one of my professors today 😭 now it's a sign for me to get back to work, i still have more finals and more deadlines for january, but after that i'd be FINALLY getting a real break 😋

AND NO PLS FDKJDFJ I FEEL U!! i hope ure getting to rest as well and that you've had a great time this holiday season <33 love u thank u for always being here 🥰 MWAH

[spencers-renaissance]

you know that a boy who likes boys is a dead boy

Summary: Spencer's gay. He joins the BAU and befriends the team, but it is 2003. It's a secret he has to keep. He just didn't expect it to be this hard.

Tags: gay!spencer, coming out, hurt/comfort, insecure!spencer, misunderstandings, angst with a happy ending, dad hotch, protective!hotch, protective!derek, childhood trauma TW: one instance of explicit homophobia, but it is referenced a lot, as is Spencer's internalised homophobia at the start of this fic. A shit ton of heteronormativity but tbh that's just canon lol

Pairing: Spencer Reid/OMC, Spencer Reid & Derek Morgan, Spencer Reid & Aaron Hotchner, The BAU Team & Spencer Reid

Word Count: 6k

Masterlist // Read on AO3

Consider this my contribution to pride month 😌 I've waited so long to post it and I'm so glad I'm finally doing it because it's definitely one of my all time favourites <3 Gideon is here somewhere but just like with all my early season fics he's not really part of the plot I combined my moreid and gen taglists bc it was hard to know the audience for this, but just ignore it if you're not interested!

you know that a boy who likes boys is a dead boy, unless he keeps his mouth shut, which is what you didn’t do, because you are weak and hollow and it doesn’t matter anymore. — richard siken, a primer for the small weird loves

Spencer has only told one person in his whole life.

His mother guessed. For as long as he can remember, she’s used gender neutral pronouns when talking about his future partner, read him all the gay literature she could find, promised him that he’s perfect just the way he is.

The trouble is that Spencer only believes her until the first grade, when Ryan Sampson shoves him over in the playground and calls him gay. His mom had only ever used that term in a sweet, loving way, taking care to associate such words with positivity, as long as his dad wasn’t around to hear. When that word comes out of Ryan Sampson’s mouth, it is not said with sweetness and love; it is said with venom, and Spencer learns quickly that his mom is wrong. He is not perfect just the way he is.

And so, he keeps it a secret. When his mom notices him getting uncomfortable at the mention of future partners, she stops bringing it up, though she refuses to give up the diverse education she provides for him outside of school. His dad tells him that one day he’ll be a strapping young man and marry a nice girl in a church, and Spencer nods along. He ignores the way his stomach turns with anxiety at the thought. Ignores the screaming match his parents have that night. Ignores the fact that it started because Diana chipped in with ‘or boy’.

He’s in high school by the time he’s twelve, and the only part he’s grateful for is the absence of pressure to get a girlfriend. His dad’s out of the picture now, and Spencer tries not to let himself think that maybe if he wasn’t like this he might have stayed. Diana’s so out of it most days that she doesn’t remember what she noticed about him when he was a child, only recalling the last few years of shoving himself so far back in the closet he can hardly see the door anymore.

It feels like he’s lost his last ally.

(He hates that a small part of him feels relieved she doesn’t remember; that he almost feels assured by the fact that the last person to know who he really is has forgotten. There is only this version of Spencer Reid now. No other exists.)

He makes the mistake during his second undergraduate degree. He’s just turned eighteen but he is already a doctor and, fortunately, this alienates him from most of his peers, but someone manages to slide past his defences. Ethan Miller is twenty, in the second year of his (first) undergraduate degree in Chemical Engineering, and he’s nice. Spencer doesn’t have a lot of experience with friendship, but they get on well and Ethan makes him laugh. For the first time, he feels comfortable in the presence of anyone other than his mother.

They slip into an easy friendship: waiting for each other after class — Spencer back in the undergraduate buildings now he has his first PhD under his belt — and going out for ice cream and pizza and Thai food. Ethan goes to parties while Spencer studies, and then they reconvene to watch Doctor Who and play cards.

For almost a year, Spencer keeps his secret carefully locked up, hidden behind the mask he’s perfected after so many years. Even though he’s eighteen, nearly nineteen now, he doesn’t try and explore that side of himself. No, that’s far too risky. He doesn’t try and pretend any other way either, he just stays silent and lets people’s assumptions lie for him, but he can’t help the longing that claws up his throat when he locks eyes with a passing guy on campus. One time, he’d seen two men kiss on a bench in the city, and he’d run back to his dorm and had a panic attack. Why couldn’t he have that?

The feelings don’t stop, and he doesn’t know how to make them. He hates that he isn’t normal, but still longs for the touch of a man, the feeling of being wrapped up in strong arms, of being kissed by dry, chapped lips, and falling asleep to a heartbeat approximately 11% slower than that of a woman’s.

It’s a constant battle inside him, emotions raging, and he struggles to control it, suppress it, tame it.

He pays a sorry price.

Ethan makes him feel comfortable, and that turns out to be a detriment. He relaxes around the other boy: he tells him about growing up as a pre-teen in a high school, about how a child feels living 260 miles away from home, even about his mother’s illness.

And one day, it slips out. They’re on the beach, lying on towels as they look up at the blue sky, talking about what their futures will look like: Ethan will be a successful chemical engineer in Berlin, and Spencer will work for the FBI, profiling serial killers.

“You’ll have to marry a German girl,” he tells Ethan. “It’ll be tough to convince an American girl to move all the way to Germany as soon as you graduate.”

“Yeah, and what about you? You’ll be off fighting crime around the country, not much of a life for a family.”

“Oh, I imagine my husband will be the type to—”

“Husband?”

Spencer freezes. It shocks him as much as it shocks Ethan. He doesn’t even pay much attention to Ethan’s disgusted face and his outraged tirade. He hears slurs and insults, hears him say that he can’t believe Spencer tricked him like this, that he was probably waiting to make a move on him, that he was never to look in Ethan’s direction again, but Spencer is frozen in time.

He’s never allowed him to think much about what his personal life might look like in the future, but he’d said ‘husband’ on instinct, without thinking, and it’s clearly something he actually wants. Ethan’s words sting, but the moment brings about a realisation Spencer is thankful for; it instigates a journey of self-discovery and self-expression, of the joy of living as your true self.

He loses his first and only friend, but he gains something much more valuable. He visits gay bars — nervously sipping a non-alcoholic drink in the corner at first, before soon becoming confident enough to respond to the men who sidle up to him and ask for his name. He lets go and dances the night away, sometimes going home with one of the many dance partners he acquires during the night, sometimes heading back to his own dorm happily alone.

Makeup and dresses and skirts and heels make their way into his wardrobe, and he befriends girls and drag queens and other gay men who encourage him to be exactly the way he is. And the best part is, he never has to come out to any of them. All of them know, and that’s good enough for everyone.

The fun comes to a sad sort of slow, however, when he joins the BAU. Everyone knows law enforcement’s relationship with the LGBT community is less than adequate — Spencer’s seen it with his own eyes: butch lesbians and men in dresses getting roughed up by angry police officers for ‘lewd behaviour’ or ‘drunkenness’ when they’re just being themselves. It’s not safe for him to tell anyone, so he doesn’t.

He still goes out with his friends when he’s in town and wears makeup and dresses and crop tops when he’s at home, but presents as rigidly straight Dr Spencer Reid to his team at the BAU.

The hardest part about it is that he loves his team. He’s known Gideon for years — and he wouldn’t be surprised if he suspects something after coming over to his house unannounced one night, only to have a man other than Spencer open the door — but he settles into a comforting dynamic with Hotch. He can’t help but see him as something of a father figure, and he knows Hotch has a soft spot for him, always looking out for him and taking him under his wing without a moment’s hesitation.

Elle, JJ, and Penelope all take a shine to him, too, teasing him without a hint of malice in their tones, only the kind of playful kindness that reminds him of his mother. He forms a special bond with Penelope and they spend hours watching Doctor Who together and geeking out on all the areas their interests overlap, and the comfort he feels with her matches the comfort he’s found with his new group of queer friends.

(She doesn’t hold a candle to Ethan, he decides one night, after he’d cried at a movie she’d made him watch and she felt so bad she made him hot chocolate and jam toast and cuddled him until he felt better.)

Derek becomes a brother to him. He puts him in a headlock at least once a day — which Spencer has been reliably informed by multiple sources is a very brotherly thing to do — and teases him relentlessly, while simultaneously being fiercely protective of him. Enough so, that Spencer sometimes wonders if he even has Hotch beat in that department.

He loves his team and his team loves him. It should be simple. It is still 2003.

He comes in one morning late for a briefing, his shirt buttoned wrong and his hair is a mess, and he’s fairly sure that his attempt to cover the hickey at the base of his neck with concealer has been ultimately unsuccessful. It’s obvious why he’s late. Gideon is too engrossed in the case file to notice, but Hotch raises an eyebrow, an amused look on his face as everyone else immediately takes to teasing him.

“Who’s the lucky lady, pretty boy?”

Elle raises an eyebrow to match Derek’s shit-eating grin, “Someone definitely got some strange last night.”

“When do we get to meet her, Spence?” JJ asks, smirking as he takes a seat.

He’s bright red — as if he needed to look any more debauched — and Spencer tries to ignore the hurt that seizes his chest at the reminder of his need to stay quiet. This team respects him, and he can’t throw that away just because Spencer gets too comfortable.

God, he wishes Penelope was here.

“None of your business,” he mutters, trying to keep his tone light. He fails.

Naturally, Hotch notices and swiftly moves the briefing on, and Spencer keeps his gaze locked on the case file, not missing the absence of a reprimand from his superior. He’s constantly thankful for the older man, but in this moment, he wishes he could hug him.

(A voice that sounds dangerously close to Ethan’s rises up and taunts him in his ear: he wouldn’t want a dirty homo like you anywhere near him—)

Derek doesn’t let up on the case, continuing to bug him about the special lady in his life. He does concede that it could’ve been a one night stand, which is one front he’s right on, but a couple more concessions are necessary before Derek comes close to the truth of last night.

Eventually, Derek stops, and Spencer notes that the cessation of comments comes suspiciously close to the last time Derek and Hotch were alone together. He doesn’t have it in him to feel angry at Hotch for stepping in when he had it handled; doesn’t have the energy to act as though his pride is wounded, because really, neither of those things are true, and he doesn’t need to add another item to ‘Spencer Reid’s List of Things He Pretends to Be.’

The situation is forgotten, and time moves on.

Things change when he finds his first proper boyfriend. He doesn’t know what he was expecting, but it certainly wasn’t the giddying rush of emotions it turns out to be, and Spencer spends his days smiling as he daydreams his time away.

His name is Oscar Wilkins, a History professor at Georgetown University, and Spencer falls quickly in love with him. Ever since their mutual friend had introduced them at a gay bar one evening, they’d spent all their free time together. He’s kind and gentle and understanding of Spencer’s hectic and unpredictable job, and he finally has the chance to experience everything he quietly and shamefully longed for as a teenager.

The only downside is the silent breaking of Spencer’s heart that the most important people in his life can’t meet his boyfriend. He longs to show Oscar off, to hold hands in front of his team, lean up to press a tender kiss to Oscar’s lips. He wants to put a framed picture of the two of them at the Washington Monument on his desk to remind him of why he needs to get through the hard days; he doesn’t want to have to sneak out of the hotel room he shares with Derek to whisper hushed, loving goodnights over the phone.

But he’s too scared. Too cowardly.

It’s different being who he is with his gay group of friends littered with wlws and drag queens and other gay and bisexual guys. They understand.

But Derek and Hotch are two extremely masculine, alpha men: Derek’s a ladies’ man and Hotch is married to a woman he met in college with a baby on the way and both have a strong and dominant energy that still sometimes manages to intimidate Spencer even after all these years. And Elle and JJ are lovely — some of his closest friends, really — but sometimes they remind him a little too much of the mean girls he went to high school with.

The hardest person to keep his secret from, though, is Penelope. She’s his best friend and he desperately wants to give her all of him, but he’s so scared. He’s lost a best friend to this secret before, and even though he’s certain she’d be fine with it, what if she accidentally let it slip to Derek? What if Hotch found out and didn’t see him in the same light anymore? What if the girls started teasing him? What if Gideon didn’t want to mentor him anymore?

The fear paralyses him. And it’s a cycle he doesn’t know how to break.

Fear, though, doesn't stop everyone from noticing his daydreaming, his dopey smile when he checks his messages, his urgency to get home where he would’ve stayed until the small hours of the morning before. As excellent as he is at hiding his sexuality, he’s fucking terrible at hiding the fact that he’s in love: it was easy enough to pretend he was straight, but hiding something this all-consuming is an impossible ask.

Derek comes over to perch on the edge of his desk one afternoon, sighing as he sits down. “Pretty boy, this is getting ridiculous,” he says, snatching Spencer’s attention away from his phone. “You’ve been grinning like an idiot for the last twenty minutes as you’ve texted Future Mrs Reid. When are we going to meet her?”

(He hates the new nickname the team has given his mystery significant other, although Oscar had found it hilarious. “It’s funny because when we get married, we’ll hardly be able to tell,” he’d argued through his laughter. “Neither of us will change our name because of our academic profiles, and we’ll both still be ‘Dr’. Our wedding rings will be the only indicator.”

Spencer hadn’t argued back, because he’d been too tongue-tied and flushed pink at Oscar’s use of ‘when’ in regards to their hypothetical nuptials. It was only made bearable by Oscar kissing him gently and tucking him under his arm, not embarrassing him any further as Spencer had sort of anticipated, warmth settling over his chest at the thought of their future together.)

“You won’t,” he replies, perhaps a little too curtly.

Derek starts at that, clearly not expecting it. He definitely should’ve tried to play it off as a joke. “What— should I be offended, pretty boy?”

You wouldn’t call me that if you knew who I really am.

“That’s up to you, Derek,” he says calmly, although he still can’t meet his eyes, “but you won’t meet the ‘Future Mrs Reid, so I think it would probably be best if you left it alone.”

“Damn,” Derek mutters under his breath, clearly pissed off and probably more hurt than Spencer ever intended. “Suit yourself.”

And with that, he gets up and leaves his desk. Spencer’s only solace is the text message he sees on his phone when he picks it back up: I love you so much. You know that, right?

The light-hearted ridicule comes to an abrupt halt after the incident with Derek, and it’s clear that he had been the biggest contributor to the teasing. He’s thankful that the jokes have stopped, but he wishes desperately that it didn’t come with the growing distance between him and his team. Loneliness takes the place of his previous irritated anxiety, and he isn’t sure what’s worse.

It all comes to a head at the end of a case in Michigan. They’re stuck in the lounge of the small inn they’d stayed in the last few days, a snowstorm having blocked them in and grounded the jet, although Gideon had long since retreated to his room. The fire’s going and they’re the only guests around, so it’s cosy enough, but Spencer can’t help but feel sick at the idea of another night away from home.

It’s only been two weeks since he’d snapped at Derek, but the chasm between him and the team is only widening with each passing day. He knows it’s not a case of ‘pick a side’, but the team’s morale relies on light-hearted banter and teasing, and him not being a part of that anymore has only brewed awkwardness. Everyone’s trying to give him space when space is the last thing he wants.

Oscar’s keeping him company over the phone at least, but it’s not quite enough to quell the loneliness swimming around his stomach, and the 'discrete' sideways looks he gets from the team only make him feel worse.

“At least it’s nice and toasty in here,” JJ sighs as she takes a sip of the hot chocolate the kindly inn owner had made for them all.

Elle hums in agreement. “There are worse places to be grounded.”

“I dunno, man, I just wanna get home,” Derek says, not taking his eyes off the fire. Spencer can’t help but agree.

“Oh, come on,” Hotch muses, considerably more jovial now the case is over, “we’re here, and that’s not going to change any time soon. We should make the most of it.”

“It’s at least nice to be somewhere sort-of Christmassy now it’s December,” Elle points out. “We could be stuck in a dingy police station like we probably will be next week.”

“Ooh, I noticed that Jemimah and Kiran started planning the Christmas party last week,” JJ says, smiling at them. “I offered my help, but they seem to have it covered.”

Hotch raises an eyebrow“That’s probably a good thing. You don’t need more work on your plate.”

“Not gonna argue with that,” she murmurs, smiling as she brings her mug to her lips again.

Spencer doesn’t miss that Derek is still stewing on the opposite side of the room.

“Are you looking forward to the Christmas party, Spencer? Will you come?” Hotch asks, clearly trying to rope him into the conversation, which he appreciates. He’s been making a lot of effort with him the past few weeks, and it’s just about the only thing that’s getting him through each day.

Before he can reply, though, Derek erupts from the other side of the room; an already pissed-off man being pushed over the edge. “He won’t even let us meet his fucking girlfriend, Hotch, he’s not gonna want to come to the Christmas party!” he yells, throwing his hands in the air as he glares at Spencer with a stormy expression raging across his face.

Suddenly, Spencer can’t stay silent anymore, and his retort shocks himself just as much as it does everyone else. “I don’t have a girlfriend!”

It might be the loudest he’s ever shouted in his whole life. He’s always been quiet and restrained, the type to state his feelings as calmly as possible no matter how he’s feeling on the inside. Even in the biggest fight he’s had with Oscar, his voice was barely loud enough to qualify as a shout.

There’s a brief stunned silence, but Derek quickly slices his way through it, voice raising to meet Spencer’s fiery emotion, fierce and loud. “Oh, don’t even go there, Reid, you’re really gonna try and argue that? You’re gonna lie about her as well as not let us meet her? What a boyfriend you are.”

“I don’t! I don’t have a girlfriend!” he repeats, voice catching this time as tears rise unbidden to the backs of his eyes and all the emotions of the journey he’s taken with his sexuality over the years flood him in a wave of intensity he’s not prepared for.

“You’re fucking lying—!”

“I have a boyfriend!” he yells. “Alright? I have a boyfriend. I’m gay.”

The anger and emotion quickly dissipates, and he’s left standing alone in front of the team he’s put so much effort into hiding this from, watching shock spell out across everyone’s expressions. He’s never felt smaller than he does in that moment, and he quickly grabs his phone before running upstairs to his room, locking the door behind him.

“Oh God, Oscar, I fucked up so bad,” he cries over the phone as soon as his boyfriend picks up.

“Hey, hey, breathe, baby,” Oscar says gently, but Spencer can hear the anxious concern in his voice, “it’s gonna be okay, I promise. I’m here. Do you want to tell me what happened?”

“I just— Oh God, I just told the team.” A new wave of horror rolls over him as he realises what he’s done. Times might be changing, but it’s still only 2006, and he doesn’t know each and every nuance of his team members’ political positions and, fuck, he hates that his existence is a fucking political position.

Oscar’s been so understanding of his reluctance to not tell the team, even though Spencer’s met pretty much everyone in his life. He isn’t sure what he’s done to earn such a gracious and understanding boyfriend, but he’s not about to question it.

“Baby, I know it’s scary, and I know you’re really worked up right now,” he counsels, voice soft and reassuring, using the nickname he knows Spencer loves the most to make him feel as safe as he can from 700 miles away, “but it’s probably not as bad as you think. From what you’ve told me about the team, they love you so much, and even in the case that in the past they've had some issue with gay people, I can't imagine they’d ever actually think of you any differently when it comes down to it, Spencer.”

He’s crying too hard to reply, and Oscar understands immediately, gently transitioning into a story about his day that slowly starts to calm him down, and by the time he’s wrapping it up, his tears are starting to subside.

“Thank you, Ozzy,” he whispers into the phone, lifting himself up off the floor and making his way to sit on the bed instead.

“You know I’d do anything for you, sweetheart,” he murmurs warmly. “Do you want me to stay on the phone for a bit?”

“Yes please,” he whispers again, holding it as close to himself as possible, drawing all the comfort he can from his boyfriend’s voice.

He lies there listening to Oscar’s voice and trying not to think about the disaster downstairs for a good ten minutes before there’s a tap at the door.

“Oz, there’s someone here,” he says, voice panicked.

“I think you should probably speak to them, baby,” he urges. “I’ll stay on the phone with you while you do, if you like?”

“Please.” He gets up from the bed gingerly, keeping his phone tightly gripped in his right hand as he slowly unlocks the door with his left, revealing Hotch on the other side.

“Hey, Spencer. Do you mind if I come in?”

He’s riddled with nerves, but Hotch is smiling warmly, and he’s never said a harsh word to Spencer, so he steps aside and lets him into his room.

Hotch quickly notices the phone in his hand, visibly still on a call. “Is that your boyfriend?”

Spencer nods.

“Do you mind if I talk to him?”

His brows knit in confusion and his lips part slightly in surprise, but it’s all he can do to hand the phone over, watching Hotch carefully.

“Hi, Spencer tells me this is his boyfriend?” Hotch inquires politely into the phone, his tone still warm. “I’m Hotch, Spencer’s boss.”

He can vaguely hear Oscar speaking on the other end of the line, and he worries slightly that Oscar will somehow give away the familial feelings he holds for Hotch, but the conversation doesn’t last long enough for the anxiety to really take over.

“Everything’s fine here, I just want to have a conversation with Spencer, so is it alright if we hang up and I talk to him alone for a minute? He can call you straight back afterwards.” After a brief pause in which Oscar says something, Hotch looks back up at him. “Are you okay with that, Spencer?”

He nods hesitantly, and Hotch says a quick goodbye to Oscar before surging forwards and wrapping Spencer in a hug. It catches him off guard, but he doesn’t waste any time in burying his face into Hotch’s neck and soaking in the comfort and warmth that always radiates from his father figure.

“Come on,” Hotch says softly as they pull away a good minute or so later, “let’s sit down, shall we?”

“You’re not mad?” Spencer can’t help but ask, the question burning his tongue as anxiety — however quietened from Hotch’s hug — still swims around in his stomach.

“There are many things that could make me mad, Spencer,” he says earnestly, “but this is not one of them. I would never be angry at you for being who you are, okay? I might… I might be overstepping here, and if I am, then tell me and I’ll back off, but I’ve always seen you as a mentee, and over the years that’s developed— well, I see you more as a son these days. And part of that is wanting to protect and support you no matter what you do or say or who you are.”

Spencer wastes no time in diving back in for a hug, clinging onto Hotch for dear life as he hugs back, rubbing his back gently.

“I’m so sorry you didn’t feel like you could tell us sooner, Spencer,” he says in a voice soft with affection and regret. “But I’m so glad you’ve told us now.”

He only presses closer at that, tears springing back to his eyes. “I didn’t want to lose you.” He knows what he’s implying, and even in a roundabout way, he’s glad he’s telling Hotch.

“Oh, Spence,” he sighs sadly, “you couldn’t do a single thing to lose me. I’m in it for the long haul.”

“Really?” he asks, hating how insecure he sounds.

“Really,” Hotch promises, pulling away as Spencer does. “Now, you have a whole team of agents downstairs who are feeling very sorry for themselves and really want to see you.”

Nausea rolls in his stomach and panic springs back up as he looks at Hotch, desperate for some sort of grounding. “Are they angry at me? Do they hate me now?”

“No one hates you, Spencer,” he says firmly. “I promise you that. Everyone just wishes that they’d made you feel more welcome and comfortable. We all hate that you felt you had to lock up something so integral to who you are, and we can’t help but feel we played a part in it.”

“No,” he protests — the last thing he wants is family blaming themselves when it has nothing to do with them, “it’s not your fault, it’s just…”

Hotch nods. “I understand, it’s okay. Now, do you want to go down and see them? You don’t have to if you don’t want to, but it might help ease your mind to see that they really don’t hate you.”

Spencer pauses, taking a moment to think. “Can I see Derek first?”

“Of course,” Hotch says understandingly, and the comforting smile that crosses his face makes Spencer feel safe and taken care of. “I’ll send him up?”

Spencer nods and Hotch hugs him once more before leaving the room almost reluctantly. He wastes no time in picking up his phone and sending a text to Oscar. You were right. Hotch is fine. He’s just sending Derek up before I go and see the team but he says that no one’s angry and I think I believe him. Thank you, Oscar. I love you.

Not even half a minute goes past before his phone lights up with a text back. I’m so glad, baby. Call me later, okay? I want to make sure you’re okay before I go to bed. I love you more.

Before Spencer can argue that actually, he is the one more in love with the other, a hesitant knock sounds on his door. Nerves suddenly flip his stomach, and he clenches and unclenches his fists a couple of times before forcing himself to cross the room, revealing a very worried and regretful-looking Derek.

“Oh, pretty boy,” he says sadly, before crushing Spencer in a warm and tender hug. Immediately, he relaxes into the arms of one of his best friends, and relief courses through his blood at Derek’s reaction. “I am so sorry that I ever made you feel like you couldn’t tell me that you were gay or had a boyfriend. That’s completely on me. I don’t care who you love, Spencer, I just want you to be happy, okay? And if this guy makes you happy, then that’s fine by me. But if he ever lays a hand on you or—”

“Derek, Derek,” he laughs, “it’s fine I get it. Thank you, though, I’m… I’m sorry I couldn’t tell you earlier and for snapping at you in the bullpen that time…”

“I understand, Spence,” he promises. “It’s in the past, okay? And I’m sorry for pushing so hard. I mean, I’d love to meet him but if you don’t feel comfortable or you don’t want to, that’s fine, too. It’s your life, man.”

“No, I… I think I want you guys to meet him. It’s been so hard to keep him away from the people I consider my family, you know?”

“Yeah, I know. Maybe after Christmas, we can all have dinner or something.”

Spencer smiles shyly. “Well, Oscar’s a great cook, so I reckon we could work something out.”

Derek grins, throwing an arm around his shoulders as he immediately jumps back into teasing him as they make their way to the door to go downstairs and see the rest of the team. “Ooh, lover boy’s got him a chef, hey? What else does this Oscar have going for him?”

Spencer chatters eagerly about his boyfriend to Derek, barely skipping a beat when he joins everyone downstairs, his friends taking his cues and joining in with the conversation seamlessly. He’s had enough fuss for one night, and the warmth and understanding on everyone’s faces tells him everything he needs to know.

“Do you have any pictures of him?” JJ asks, raising an eyebrow with eager expectancy as they all settle back into their seats by the fire, a warm and unbelievably happy feeling settling in Spencer’s stomach.

He blushes, digging out his phone from his pocket and unlocking it. “More than a few, I think.”

He finds the most recent picture of his boyfriend — a candid shot of him cooking in the kitchen, spatula aloft, and a huge grin on his face — and hands the phone around.

“Oh wow, you like them buff, huh, pretty boy?” Derek teases as soon as he gets his hands on it, and Spencer’s stomach twists in a sudden bout of fear, expecting to see some hesitancy or even disgust on his friend’s face. What if he thinks that Spencer has a crush on him? What if he’s uncomfortable around him now?

But if Derek’s having any of those thoughts, they don’t show on his face. He’s smiling widely and openly, all the pent-up anxiety and frustration borne from hurt gone from his body language, and he looks completely comfortable sat next to Spencer, his arm stretched out behind him on the back of the sofa.

They sit happily around the fire for a couple of hours, settling into a happy, intimate familiarity Spencer hadn’t realised was missing when he was hiding something so integral to his being from his family, and he’s still smiling when they finally part ways to head to bed, the clock ticking closer and closer to 1 am.

He gets ready for bed quickly, brushing his teeth and throwing on the top he’d stolen from Oscar the first time he’d stayed at his place; a welcome change from his worn and wrinkled suit. As soon as his teeth are brushed and the lights are all off except for his bedside lamp, he pulls out his phone, knowing there’s one more thing he has to do before he goes to sleep.

“Spencer?” Penelope’s voice sounds down the line, clearly concerned. “It’s almost 2 am here, are you okay?”

“I’m gay,” he says, getting straight to the point. The main reason he ever kept it from her was because of his fear of it accidentally getting out to the team rather than fear over her reaction. After all, multiple of his drag queen friends are also hers.

“Oh my God,” she says in that small voice she uses when she’s not actually talking to you, before finally actually replying to me. “Spencer, I’m so happy you told me!”

He doesn’t miss her choice of words, or the way she says them and he tilts his head suspiciously. “You already knew, didn’t you?”

She sighs. “Yeah. I’m sorry, a couple of months ago I saw a text from Oscar on your phone when you went to the bathroom during one of our Doctor Who marathons, and it wasn’t hard to figure out the relationship.”

“And… wait, you’re not mad at me for not telling you sooner?”

“Spencer! Of course not. I was waiting for you to be comfortable enough to share it with me. I felt awful that I knew without your consent but I didn’t want to tell you because I didn’t want to catch you off guard or make you feel uncomfortable. It’s fine that you waited, baby genius, I’m just so happy you told me now. What finally gave you the courage?”

“Well, it might have slipped out in front of the team this evening,” he admits sheepishly, “and the only reason I never told you was because I was scared that it would slip out somehow — accidentally, of course, I didn’t think you’d tell anyone on purpose — and now everyone knows. It’s been killing me not to tell you, Penelope, it really has because I love you so much and you’re my best friend and I trust you with my life, it’s just…”

“Whoa, slow down, Spence,” she laughs fondly, “you don’t have to explain yourself to me, I understand. But I’m glad you finally told everyone and you can be yourself completely with us, now. We all love you no matter what, you know that right?”

“I do now.”

“Good. You should get some sleep, baby boy, it’s late and you’ve had an emotional evening.”

Spencer smiles. “Yeah, I know. You should, too, Pen. I’ll see you when we can finally make it home, okay? Love you.”

“Love you, too, 187,” she says softly, and Spencer can hear the smile in her voice. “Goodnight.”

As soon as he hangs up, he settles down into the bed, turning off the light and pulling the duvet up over his shoulders before dialling one more number.

“Hey, baby,” Oscar says, voice as gentle and caring as it always is, although thicker with tiredness now. “I take it everything went okay?”

“Yeah,” Spencer murmurs, already feeling tired as the safety he always feels at the sound of Oscar’s voice settles into the fibres of his being. “It went so well. I can’t wait for you to meet everyone.”

“I can’t wait either, sweetheart. Are you in bed now?”

“Yeah,” he sighs. “Can you talk to me as I fall asleep?”

“Anything for you, Spence,” he says softly, before transitioning seamlessly into a story about the professors on campus, and his gentle comfort and the knowledge of the unconditional love his family has for him finally lulls Spencer into the best sleep he’s had in weeks.

taglist : @criminalmindsvibez @moreidstrobed @suburban--gothic @strippersenseii @takeyourleap-of-faith @negativefouriq @makaylajadewrites @iamrenstark @livrere-blue @hotchseyebrows @reidology @i-like-buttons @spencerspecifics @bau-gremlin @hotchedyke @tobias-hankel @goobzoop @marsjareau @garcias-bitch @oliverbrnch @physics-magic @sbeno22 @temily @enbyspencer @im-autistic @anxious-enby @kuolonsyoja @reidreids (add yourself to my taglist via this form!!)

[dykefever]

LAURA HI!! im barricading the walls as we speak im hanging a little cup and wire between us no one gets to cause trouble share yr little thoughts abt the little idiots in the jar!! and ill tell you abt how i watched the bear recently consequently found out abt it's renewal for a second season and am forcing anyone who will listen to watch it bc of you xx

OMG hi layla hi xx wow okay this is all just between you and me xx i’ll think all my best thoughts about these guys although i feel like i’ve forgotten everything i’ve ever thought about them!! (also HOW good is the bear i am so honoured to have you led you to this wonderful show that makes me gnaw on my arm!!! literally holding hands while we watch s2 xx)

also THOUGHTS:

i feel like people either make sirius too sweet and understanding or a huge cunt that has like hardly any empathy which are both incorrect to me!! the first one is more modern fics and the second is is the trend in the 2000s. to me sirius is extremely caring and loyal and will believe those he loves over all else. he also struggles to see the consequences to his own actions for sure and is impulsive but i don’t think he’s cruel. often like post prank in early 2000s fics it has sirius just not? apologising? or barely apologising? and remus just allowing that. i think (remus thoughts gear up) after the prank this is remus’s big break to be mad and stay mad for a while at sirius. he has justification, sirius has gone too far this time and he can use his morally superior my-life-is-horrible complex which is sooooo sexy of him. as he should.

james is written like an arrogant BORING popular kid which is insane because he became an animagus for remus so he obviously has DEPTH. james gets done SO dirty !!! i think people should explore his cruel streak (or people may not view it as that because there’s a lot of ways to write his bullying of snape and how it occurs n when it becomes a rivalry etc) more too because it’s extremely interesting in the context of a golden boy perfect head boy kind of character. even when james is doing wrong he’s not doing any wrong actually. also. so jot that down x

but stop trying to apply morality to determine whether they’re worthy of being liked/written about to any of these characters because they all do like multiple terrible things…. as all people do <3

um also i genuinely find snape pretty boring but when he’s villainised insanely in marauders fics i think that’s pretty boring too

[dashuisofanubis]

Got any fic recs? 🥺💕

Definitely! I warn you, this is going to be long bc there are so many good fics out there

rugged heart by The Sushi Monster

And that's when it hits Eddie that is something new and different; ensemble. (Post-"The Touchstone of Ra")

I love this one so much, its wonderful and I think about it a lot

You Give Me Feelings That I Adore by crocs

Interestingly, when KT and Nina meet for the first time, the world is not ending. (NinaKT. Post-S3.)

Short, but very sweet

A bona fide mystery by marshmallownose

“With this Circle of Light, I seal the Circle of Life,” she said, trying to fit the pieces together only for them to topple and fall apart. “With this Circle of Light, I seal the Circle of Life,” Nina said again, voice pitching in desperation. Nothing. She whirled around to face them, green eyes glassy with frustration. “Why isn’t it working?"

No spoilers, but this one is fun to think about

(Baby) it's cold outside by DietS0daS0ciety

In which Patricia Williamson will never back down from a (snowball) fight.

The Anubis kids have a snowball fight! What more could you want

Fairytale of Amun York by crocs

'Nina — Might be a good idea to attend this,' it read. 'Seems like something you might be into!' A crudely drawn smiley face followed the message. It still smelled vaguely of scented perma-marker. Nina leant in. Apple-scented perma-marker.' (NinaFabian. Post-Series.)

I love this one very much

Coffee, decaf by sleepymarvel

Nobody had ever called her smart before. She’d been called a bitch, a troublemaker occasionally, suicidally brave once, there was the time Alfie called her a scheming pixie and she thought that was pretty funny, but nobody had ever told her she was smart.

A really cool piece looking at early s1 Patricia's thoughts on Rufus. I recommend the rest of the fics in this series too!

In the house of yesteryear by marshmallownose

every tragedy has a beginning and an end, but the moments in the middle are often forgotten whether they be bitter or sweet.

this is a moment in time.

Sarah, Victor and Rufus as teenagers!

The Heist by mask_of_anubis

It's Prospective Parents' Day once again and the Anubis students couldn't be less excited. But when Mr. Sweet decides to place the Frobisher Shield under lockdown for safe keeping, the kids set out on the ultimate parents' day mission: a heist to reclaim the shield and win eternal glory. Takes place after the end of season 2 before the school term ends.

This one is so much fun I adore it

Family ties by HouseofSecrets

Evelyn Meridian Martin’s life was one of joy and suffering. Haunted by dreams of a girl she has never met in a house she has never seen, Evelyn searches for answers and unearths long buried secrets.

Backstory for Nina’s grandmother!

Trixie by daddyoshie

Where did the nickname "Trixie" come from? And why do only Alfie and Jerome use it? Until now, Patricia has never told anyone the story behind the name.

Or: The story of the time that Alfie and Jerome went out of their way for Patricia and forged a strong bond of friendship in the process.

This one is very fun and very sweet! (also one of the tags is 'no beta we crash and burn like a Jerome moneymaking scheme' and I think that's wonderful)

Tears of Gold by HouseofSecrets

After finding out about her father and the secrets Mara and Jerome had been keeping from her, Poppy calls in reinforcements. Meanwhile the Sibunas race against time to find the Mask of Anubis.

Okay I am nowhere near as far through this as I should be, but it is incredible and I definitely recommend it!

it's called "therapy," and we all need it. by ironicsopsychotic

one thing leads to another, and—because it’s anubis house—they decide it’s only fair to get victor a therapist. for all their sakes as well as his.

A chaotic, very fun text fic

Two is Company by marshmallownose

When Eddie and his sister Kira were invited by their estranged father to attend the esteemed Amun Academic Boarding School in the United Kingdom, they were unaware of exactly what they were getting into.

What if Eddie had a twin sister? Honestly check out all of marshmallownose/@incorrectsibunaquotes' works, they're all wonderful. Speaking of, what would this list be if I didn't include...

House of Mistakes by marshmallownose

'Eddie knew better. He really did! But he needed to vent to someone, and Denby was willing to listen. And so he let it out right then and there. And she’d been so understanding, so supportive…so overly sweet.

Maybe that’s why Eddie felt like such a chump.'

Sinner Eddie AU! Sinner Eddie AU!

Finally I have to recommend this because of the pure chaos that went down when we created it

Getting Caught in the Rain (Down in Africa) by the Sibuna Lives discord

A group trip to Germany should be simple.

Here is a list of things not considered simple:

- Mick getting on the wrong plane

- Jerome following him

- Joy finding them stranded in South Africa

- Fabian getting kidnapped

- No one answering his distress calls

- Alfie calling a SWAT team to save him

Mick: Hey Joy, if you like pina coladas

Mick: or getting caught in the rain

Mick: I forgot the rest

Joy: Oh you old romantic you

Oh and I'm going to rec myself here bc I'm still proud of this fic

Making Excuses (or 5 times Eddie and Patricia got chores and 1 time they didn't) by Whispers_of_Gallifrey

Alternatively titled: 6 times Victor got a migraine

It was all subjective really. Maybe they had been miscreants launching a deliberate and malicious attack against Victor’s prize dahlias, or maybe they had just been having fun playing catch when the competitive streak kicked in and the flowers were unfortunately caught in the cross-fire. If he hadn’t wanted his flowers to become a casualty, maybe he shouldn’t have planted them there.

Tragically, Victor didn’t see it their way, so Patricia and Eddie were once again stuck doing chores for the foreseeable future.

There you go! If you got to the end of this congratulations because I think I went overboard (though there are far more I could have recced there's so many good fics out there!)

[marley-manson]

hawkeye but if someone already asked him klinger pls

I'll do both!

send me a character and i’ll list:

favorite thing about them

Hawkeye:

The gay jokes honestly. I love everything about him, I mean I just wrote meta the other day about Hawkeye and death as a theme lol, but let's be real here I literally only started watching Mash for Hawkeye's gay flirting. Everything else is just an awesome bonus.

Though also to expand on that it helps that Hawkeye is literally like the exact type of character who is incredibly easy to read as bi because of it. Like, if most other character types made nonstop jokes about wanting to fuck dudes in the military in the 1950s I would actively take it as evidence that they're straight. But Hawkeye? Whose 2 major character attributes are: making jokes as a way of communicating his feelings and antagonzing the military by flaunting his non-military traits with very little concern for potential discharges? Come on.

Klinger:

How genuinely into crossdressing he gets. How much work he puts into his wardrobe, how he starts caring about fashion, becomes pro at tailoring, the scene where he talks about it with Sidney and Sidney tells him it's cool, giving Margaret his wedding dress... even later on I love that he keeps wearing the fur coat and pink housecoat even when he otherwise stops crossdressing.

There's a lot worth saying about how at the core it's a dude in a dress joke and transphobic implications of his character in general and some moments in particular, but like, for the most part the vibes with Klinger are exactly what I want when it comes to gnc characters, particularly for the time, intent schmement. It's fun as hell.

least favorite thing about them

Hawkeye:

file not found. I don’t even really wanna say the misogyny, because I consider that more a writing flaw of the early seasons that the show just ended up pinning on Hawkeye because everyone else (aside from women’s showers peeker Radar which got conveniently forgotten about) was gone by the time they went feminist.

Actually wait no I do have something: the bootlicking lol. In later seasons when the show gets more pro military sometimes, there are episodes where Hawkeye just goes along with dumb military shit and seems to try his best to fulfill his role as a captain, and I fucking hate to see it. For an example, Promotion Commotion. Or say, Morale Victory where, in contrast to earlier seasons where he was very reasonable and apologetic in not granting Klinger a discharge on the rare occasion he had the power bc it would fuck him over if he did, in this he's annoyed about Klinger just wanting a 3 day pass.

I got headcanons to explain this, I think you can argue it does make sense for Hawkeye as a character who is so dependent on his relationships with other people to lose his defiant edge when his friends are now Potter, Margaret, B “stop trying to change things you can’t change” J, and even Klinger has succumbed. But it's not a good look for the show bc my headcanons aren't canon.

Klinger:

Does Klinger even have flaws? I guess the fact that he's into commitment before sex according to Ain't Love Grand, because I would like to think he and Trapper fucked once or twice but that makes it difficult lol.

favorite line

Hawkeye:

HOW can I possibly choose one?

The carry a gun rant, I guess, it's iconic for a reason. But I'm also slightly obsessed with how impossible it is to read "You [married]?" "Somebody's gonna have to get me pregnant first," as anything but a not at all veiled come on.

Klinger:

Every time he bitches to himself in Arabic.

brOTP

Hawkeye and Margaret. I love them, I love them, I really truly love them. I love that they’re not romantically interested and not even BFFs, they have very little in common, they don’t really even like each other as people, and I don’t think they’re likely to remain close after the war, and yet despite all that they fill this really personal, emotional niche for each other where they’re each others’ go-to emotional support. It’s really interesting and unique imo.

Also I love when they get protective of each other. Margaret stepping between MP and Hawkeye in Peace on Us, Hawkeye shielding her in Aid Station, Margaret physically pulling Hawkeye out of danger in Comrades in Arms, Hawkeye distracting her with twenty questions in CAVE, etc.

Klinger:

Klinger and literally everyone except Potter, but I guess I'll go with Klinger and Hawkeye, especially in the early - mid seasons. They have this vibe of like, not quite clicking interpersonally, but still being like, allies? The way when BJ and Potter replace Henry and Trapper Hawkeye seems to turn to Klinger more often for a while (probably a result of Jamie Farr joining the main cast and the writers needing to find ways to incorporate him, but it fits really well). The way Klinger is the only one comfortable chatting with Hawkeye in the finale phone scene. Hawkeye telling Klinger to wear a slip under his uniform when he gets psychosomatic hives, "Klinger it's us, you don't have to pretend with me," Klinger having Hawkeye and Trapper's section 8 signatures on standby in the first few seasons, Klinger trading his food from home for a magazine about Maine for Hawkeye... there's just a lot of good stuff there despite Hawkeye being a dick sometimes.

OTP

Hawkeye:

I don’t feel like I have an otp for Hawkeye because I want him to fuck basically every dude he interacts with aside from Radar, including original characters, but if one ship beats out the others slightly it’s Hawkeye/Trapper. They’re not all that interesting, but they have great chemistry, they’re a ton of fun, and while Hawkeye is a character who's fun to torture, ultimately I'd still like him to live happily ever after with the kind of dude who would ride on the side of a helicopter just to pick up an order of ribs with him.

Klinger:

I don't have an otp for Klinger either, but I've got no beef with his canon romance with Soon Lee and I think it's thematically appropriate and kind of cute, especially if I'm headcanoning Klinger as some flavour of gq, which I generally am. I got on board when she said she wanted to see him in a dress.

nOTP

Hawkeye:

Hawkeye/a woman. I see him as bi but that doesn't mean I want to read about him in a relationship with a woman. Not even an ot3 thing. If I have to pick specifics, I'll go with 2: Hawkeye/Margaret, they are perfect as friends but their relationship is ruined for me the instant it turns romantic.

And Hawkeye/BJ/Peggy. My thoughts on poly irl are whatever, I've been in open relationships and had fun, I have poly friends, it's cool and great for some people. My thoughts on poly in fiction are I inevitably get angry on behalf of at least one of them, and I'm only interested if the relationship crashes and burns in an epic way. I can get into a ship having occasional threesomes, but that's about it.

Also like, I don't think it's ooc for Hawkeye at all, I just don't want it, but tbh I do think it's ooc for BJ lol, he'd be the weak link that would cause a three way divorce there. Without a novel's worth of character development I cannot imagine him being emotionally mature enough for poly.

Klinger:

I got nothin. I'm open to pretty much every Klinger ship I've seen someone mention. I guess maybe I'll say Klinger/Hawkeye, because in contrast to most dudes they interact with, and kind of ironically lol, I mostly get the vibe that he and Hawkeye have 0 interest in each other sexually.

random headcanon

Hawkeye:

The reason the gay jokes dried up so hard in the later seasons is that something happened. BJ caught Hawkeye with someone and made things awkward, they made out and made things awkward, maybe Hawkeye got investigated, whatever, but I need to invent a reason for it. Also the nice thing about the first two is it adds an interesting layer to BJ's jokes persisting.

Klinger:

Opens a dress shop back in the states eventually, which lowkey ends up a favourite of drag queens and trans women. It's what's gotta happen.

unpopular opinion

Hawkeye:

I guess at least in this era of fandom my unpopular opinion is that he and BJ would make a terrible couple. I think they're lowkey in love with each other bc it's a fun way to watch the show but I think they would be a disaster if they actually got together.

Klinger:

I view him dropping the dodge attempts as a tragedy and I hate that he gets promoted.

song i associate with them

Hawkeye: idk lol. let's say Mutiny, I Promise You - The New Pornographers

Klinger: i wracked my brain for something more original but I had to give up and go with Draft Dodger Rag - Phil Ochs

favorite picture of them

I’m changing this to like... visual moment in time. I don’t have favourite pictures.

Hawkeye:

For some reason my first instinct is to say Hawkeye coming off 30+ hours of surgery, exhausted and extremely keyed up, and walking on the furniture and juggling BJ’s socks in Ain’t Love Grand. Idk there are a million more iconic moments but that’s just quintessential Hawkeye to me.

But also as a bonus, the way he disgustedly picks up a gun between thumb and forefinger like it's a dead rat in a few episodes, like Deal Me Out iirc.

Klinger:

The statue of liberty shot at the end of Big Mac had me in tears. Iconic.

[sugaxela]

AN ACCIDENTAL FIC REC LIST

So.. I’m a lurker who reads a lot of fics and I get annoyed when I can’t relocate my fave ones. I started making this list of my faves mostly for myself but then figured I’d share it...

I’m Yoongi biased and gravitate towards angst fics so it’s mostly that but there’s fics for every member tossed in here. Some of these are pretty popular so you might have seen a few. 

Also, I realized I need to read more Jin, Jimin, and Hoseok fics so if you have recommendations let me know!

Once again it’s a LOT of angst so I would just like to say... CRYING IS GOOD FOR U.

***

KSJ

Start Anew - @gukyi

Seokjin x Reader. Angst. Summary: it’s been five years since you left your hometown, vowing never to return, but a simple invitation to a christmas party and a yearning to know whether or not you’re truly over the heartbreak you left behind has you wondering if, maybe, the christmas spirit and promise of a new beginning can change your mind.

No Limit - @sailorbellewrites

Seokjin x Reader. Fluff. Summary: you and jungkook don’t even look alike. how was seokjin supposed to know you were off limits?

Lovely Little Mess - @guksheart

Seokjin x Reader. Fluff, smut. Summary: telling seokjin of your pregnancy should not be so daunting, but you hide it  as long as you can—at least until you are sitting with him in a bathtub and the secret comes spilling out. 

No Parking - @jungshookz

Seokjin x Reader. Fluff. Summary: “to the asswipe who owns this mini cooper - do you know how to read signs? this is a no-parking zone. no. parking. zone. that means you are not allowed to park in this zone. DO NOT park here.” (also I made up the title bc it doesn’t have one)

MYG

Seasons Change - @taetaesbaebaepsae

Yoongi x Reader. Angst. Summary: Min Yoongi and you, through the seasons, break up and come back together. Nobody said love was easy.

I’ll Float Away - @ppersonna

Yoongi x Reader. Angst. Summary: years after the breakup, yoongi, a successful award-winning rapper with an unhealthy addiction, finds your wedding invite on Facebook.

Memory Lane - @hayjeon

Yoongi x Reader. Fluff. Summary: grumpy husband yoongi au aka lots of fluff (mentions of sex)

Do It Again - @kimnjss

Yoongi x Reader. Angst. Summary: months after deciding to end their three year long relationship, a sex tape hits the internet. fans go wild speculating that rap star, min yoongi and aspiring model, yn are the stars. old feelings arise as the couple try to figure out a way out of this.

Cuddles and Kittycats - @dinoyoongi

Yoongi x Reader. Fluff, angst. Summary: After a night of drinking, you go to Yoongi’s dorm for some quality cuddles. Unfortunately, you’ve forgotten that you are currently giving him the silent treatment.

Overstayed Welcome - @kkaep-jjjang

Yoongi x Reader - Fluff, smut. Summary: Y/N decides to get over her crush by getting under someone else. Sounds fool proof right? Wrong.

Ghosted - @bloomsuga

Yoongi x Reader. SM AU. Summary: your new roommate is everything you could ask for: quiet, never makes messes, a killer dry sense of humor... and oh yeah—he’s dead.

Wildest Moments - @joonbird

Yoongi x Reader. Angst. Summary: “Min Yoongi is forbidden territory. And although you both know better, the two of you just can’t seem to stay apart.”

Romance is Dead - @dinoyoongi

Yoongi x Reader. Angst, fluff. Summary: You try to surprise Yoongi with a night full of romance but he manages to ruin all of your plans.

Fools Rush In - @sailorbellewrites

Yoongi x Reader. Drabble series. Summary: min yoongi, music executive and perpetual bachelor, marries a las vegas stripper he’s only known for six months. chaos ensues.

Pretend - @gimmesumsuga

Yoongi x Reader. Angst. Summary: “You know what they say: the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else, right?” 

Aquiver - @floralseokjin

Yoongi x Reader. Idol AU. Summary: Yoongi can’t remember the last time he was able to successfully bring himself to the point of orgasm, then Namjoon gives him a business card advertising ‘Healing Hands’, and that’s where he meets you; pretty and innocent looking, who gets paid to provide hand jobs for a living…

Hidden Stars - @jungblue

Yoongi x Reader, Jungkook x Reader. Angst. Summary: It started out simple, but when your feelings start to grow for the idol who isn’t allowed to date, things get complicated.

Talk To Me - @btsrpp

Yoongi x Reader. Fluff, angstyish. No summary. But it involves a silent treatment.

No Title - @jungxk

Yoongi x Widow!Reader. Angst. No summary.

JHS

Hobi’s Girl - @v-hope

Hoseok x Reader. SM Au. Summary: after attending a bts concert and very clearly catching one of the members’ attention, you can’t help but get flooded with hate comments once people find your twitter account. who would’ve thought that would be the reason jung hoseok would find his concert girl, too.

Bloom - @jungxk

Hoseok x Reader. Smut. Summary: you’ve always had a crush on hobi and he’s always handled that gently. what he can’t handle is you now, nine years later. 

Blue Side - @minyoongone

Hoseok x Reader. SM AU. Summary: when you get a text from a heartbroken boy who you mistake for your ex

KNJ

Confirm or Deny - @dinoyoongi

Namjoon x Reader. Angst. Summary: You’re a member of the rising group FRNZEE. You’ve been dating Namjoon for years when Dispatch releases an article exposing your relationship. Your company confirms the relationship. Big Hit denies it.

You’ve Got That - @mikrksmos

Namjoon x Reader. Angst. Summary: After making a life-changing decision for your career, you’re unsure of how exactly to bring it up to your boyfriend after your relationship and communication has not really been in sync. Namjoon is ready to take this relationship to the next stage, and he is sure that what he needs to ask you will be the solution to all the problems you have been having. Both know this next move is the right idea, but are unaware of how parallel those ideas really are.

Duck and Cover - @versigny

Namjoon x Reader. Fluff. Summary: There were two things you never dreamed would become your biggest worries with your new job: Kim Namjoon, and that god damn camera.

Inked - @1997jk

Namjoon x Reader. heavy angst, slow burn, soulmate au. (no summary).

Try Me - @jjkfire

Namjoon x Reader. Fluff. Summary: You wanted nothing more than to leave behind your old self when you graduated from high school and moved on to college to play rugby but when you see your high school classmate, resident fuckboy and captain, Kim Namjoon, at the rugby department orientation, you feel like everything might fall apart.

Stitches - @glassbangtan

Namjoon x Reader. Angst. Summary: People always said getting married at a young age was a mistake - could they have been right?

All In - @kookiesjoonies

Namjoon x Reader. SM AU. Summary: you aren’t usually one to give out your number to strangers (let alone customers), but after you start talking to Namjoon and getting to know him, you decide that there’s no way you’re going to let him leave without it. however, he fails to mention that he’s one of the most popular rappers in South Korea. and it just so happens that one of your best friends ends up with an extra ticket to one of his shows. 

PJM

Come Home to Me Darling - @roses-ruby

Jimin x Reader. Angst. Summary: Jimin cheats and you try to make him stay. But whatever you do, it’s never enough.

Attention and Care - @your-daily-biaswrecking

Jimin x Reader. Fluff, angstish. Summary: Jimin must be the only person in the world who complains about his girlfriend not complaining... When Amy doesn't pester him to come home early (like the rest of the members) he starts thinking she might not care for him as much.

Daisies - @silverlightqueen

Jimin x Reader. SM AU. Summary: You’ve had a long-running feud with fellow idol Park Jimin, saving all the anger and bitterness for the yearly award shows and shooting each other a few dirty looks, not bowing when you walk past each other, or just generally throwing shade. After one particularly obvious encounter between the two of you, the fans start to notice, just in time for The Rose Tour!

Doubt - @heartkook

Jimin x Reader. Fluff, angst. Summary: Jimin gets jealous of your relationship with Jungkook, and needs reassuring that he’s the only one you love.

KTH

Of Lace and Lust - @hobidreams

Taehyung x Reader. Smut. Summary: friendship rule number one: don’t imagine how amazing your best friend’s cock would feel inside you. except that’s all you can think about after accidentally discovering taehyung’s kink for panties. specifically, the lacy ones you’re so fond of wearing. 

Queen Cobra - @fantasybangtan

Taehyung x Reader. Gang AU. Summary: when your boss offers the chance to take down the nation’s most lucrative gang from the inside out, you know you’ll do it no matter what the cost… even if that means entering an arranged marriage with the kingpin himself.

See You - @gimmesumsuga

Taehyung x Reader. Smut. Summary: The one where Taehyung notices you at a concert, and can't help but want to see you again.

Who Cares? - @floralseokjin

Taehyung x OC. Angst. Summary: what happens when Taehyung falls for someone who’s already taken? Can he control his feelings or will they take over and render him powerless? In the end is it all her fault or his…?

Color of Your Shirt - @firebettercallnct

Taehyung x Reader. SM AU. Summary: when you're close to your soulmate your shirt changes to their favorite color. yn hates taehyung's favorite color.

JJK

Comfort Inn Ending - @joonbird

Jungkook x Reader. Angst. Summary: “It was you who Jungkook gave his heart to- that is, until the day you broke it. And it is you now, hoping that some faultlines can be repaired, and that some broken hearts can be put back together again.”

After I Left You - @latetaektalk

Jungkook x Reader. Angst. Summary: “when you decided to meet up with taehyung for dinner to reconnect, you didn’t expect to see jungkook, your ex, on a date with his current girlfriend and not to mention, end up fake dating taehyung.”

Rattled - @gukslut

Jungkook x Reader. Genre: Single dad AU, Angst, Healing, E2L, F2L, Smut. (no summary)

Risk It - @kookiesjoonies

Jungkook x Reader. Sm Au. Summary: a drunken text ends with you wrapped up in the arms of your ex-boyfriend. aka the man that you dumped two years prior, after he refused to marry you. suddenly, all of the feelings that you’d seemingly had buried come rushing back up to the surface, and you’re not sure how long you can ignore them.

Damn the Delivery Boy - @deerguk

Jungkook x Reader. Fluff. Summary: Jeon Jeongguk is a computer science major working as a pizza delivery boy, and you are an uninspired published author who has just started an art degree. When you realise that the delivery boy is your old high school crush, he keeps coming back, but with more to offer than just puff pastry and vegetarian supreme. Though little did he know that he would end up giving you something much more that flips both of your worlds completely upside down in the form of two blue lines and nine months.

One Thing Right - @hobios

Jungkook x Reader. Angst, fluff. Summary: desperate to get your ailing mother into the best care possible, you ask your childhood friend turned enemy to marry you for his health insurance benefits. the only problem is it’s illegal. and he’s the sheriff. and you swore to hate him since the day he broke your best friend’s heart.

Hidden Stars - @jungblue

Jungkook x Reader, Yoongi x Reader. Angst. Summary: It started out simple, but when your feelings start to grow for the idol who isn’t allowed to date, things get complicated. 

Tamped - @chimoona

Jungkook x Reader. Smut, fluff. Summary: You and your business partner/best friend Jin have struggled to find good help to run your coffee shop. Employee after employee, it just never worked out. However, Jungkook is determined to impress and deliver. He wants this more than ever, and it always feels good to want something. To need, well, that’s even better.

Strawberry Kisses - @kimnjss

Jungkook x Reader. SM AU. Summary: an online dating app pairs him with the perfect girl. the two quickly start falling for each other and when things are getting good, he finds out she’s his best friend’s little sister.

Crush - @jungxk

Jungkook x Reader. Fluff, light angst. No summary, amnesiac jk.

Look Alive - @jamaisjoons

Jungkook x Reader. Angst. Summary: a year after you and jungkook break up, the two of you meet at your brother’s party.

***

I got a lot of these from some fic rec master lists.

Here’s a namjoon angst master list by @bts-ficrecs

Also this bts fic rec list by @platinumjeon

An infidelity list by @hellreads

Fic-Recs by @joonapeach

Top fics compilation by @xjoonchildx

There’s more but I’ll add those when I find them, and I’ll either update this list or make a new one when I have enough new fics.

[toxicsamruby]

comparative post abt supernatural and revolutionary girl utena :( tw for incest, csa, abuse, and a brief mention of suicide. Also, spoilers for rgu.

supernatural and revolutionary girl utena (the anime. i havent seen the movie or read the manga this post is abt the show only) hit a lot of the same thematic notes and it is really striking because supernatural seems to hit them by accident and ends up with a totally different conclusion and when you compare it to rgu actually ends up endorsing everything that rgu criticized.

revolutionary girl utena is a surrealist show about ohtori academy, which is removed from reality and controlled by a godlike figure, akio. akio maintains his own power through grooming the students in his care and having them reproduce power dynamics, namely the system of gender, through abuse, violence, and bullying. akio sexually abuses his own younger sister, anthy, and multiple other students over the course of the show, and in turn, boys in attendance at this school learn abusive patterns of behavior while girls are conditioned to accept them. the key themes of the show are cycles of abuse, violence in gender roles, and the way interpersonal gender-based abuse feeds into the larger system of gender and misogyny and vice versa. the fact that ohtori is so removed from reality, that all the fighting and abuse that takes place inside of it is isolated from the "real world," is important; extremely stringent gender roles are reified as natural and necessary, as is akio's power, despite the fact both are social constructs.

surface level, supernatural couldn't be more different, yeah. but it actually does hit similar notes: the system of hunting is removed from the "real world," and although the characters tend to weave between the supernatural and normal worlds, there is always a level of separation between them and normalcy, there's always the sense that the supernatural world is almost entirely distinct from the normal one. even when they do mix, the subplot is resolved, and by the next episode or the next season the mix is forgotten about, as if the real world had never been touched by the supernatural at all. it is considered of paramount importance that "normal people" are never told about hunting but never explained why (this rule, at least originally, is made by john. an abusive figure of authority making arbitrary rules of isolation to control the children in his charge? hm.)

this level of isolation between the supernatural and the "real world" helps to reify the concept of monstrosity itself: within the world of hunting, anything other than human is a monster, even though these definitions are constantly shifting and the consequences for monstrosity change frequently. we are shown over and over again, textually, that there are many many sentient monsters with thoughts and feelings and emotions and needs and desires, who are just as morally complex as any human beings, but most of them end up under the control of hunters or exterminated anyway. why IS a monster a monster? the separation of hunting from normalcy serves to keep people from asking that question. the system of hunting is so entrenched in the world of the supernatural, and the world of the supernatural is so separated from normalcy, that the concept of monstrosity is considered to be natural and necessary. where a "normal" person might ask why those vampires in 'last holiday' had to be killed bc they didn't really do anything wrong on screen, hunters know that monsters need to die because that's the rules of the supernatural world.

in rgu, akio maintains his control of ohtori through the hierarchy of gender. that's how the school is structured, with boys playing a specific role and girls playing the counterpart role. akio needs that system, because it's what facilitates his abuse of anthy, and his abuse of anthy (and similar relationships where boys abuse girls and more specifically brothers abuse sisters) is what gives the rest of the system permission to continue existing. touga grooms and later sexually assaults his younger sister nanami. touga is a human child, no older than 16 years old, and was himself groomed by akio and the system in which he lives. his abuse of nanami is a manifestation of that system. these abusive relationships allow and are allowed by the system. at the end of the show, utena and anthy, two girls abused by akio, help one another escape not only their abuser but the school which permitted and fed off of their abuse. their escape doesn't destroy akio or ohtori or the system as a whole, but it puts a crack in it. it serves as a example to other abused children, and offers a path to healing. overall, its a genuinely impactful story about how gendered abuse happens, how damaging sibling abuse and incest is, and how a system of power both facilitates and depends upon abusive relationships happening within it.

the interesting thing about this is that supernatural's system of power is different (monsters and humans instead of girls and boys), but it's also enforced in similar ways by the god figure (well. the literal biblical god, actually. chuck.) in supernatural. monsters and human beings are divinely separated both in the afterlife (despite the arbitrary nature of the difference between them) and on earth (chuck has written down everything ahead of time, especially surrounding the protagonist hunters and their way of life). sam is established very early on to be monstrous, first because of the demon blood, then as lucifer's chosen vessel, later as soulless. each time, he needs to be brought back under human/hunter control, meaning dean's control. dean's authority over sam (and later his abuse of him) is in part a manifestation of the accepted power dynamic of hunter over monster, which is established at the beginning of season 2 when john tells dean that he might have to kill sam if he becomes a monster.

in rgu, the only acceptable male-female dynamic is controller and controlled, protector and protected, abuser and abused. women can only be witches, like anthy, or princesses, like nanami. in supernatural, the only acceptable human-monster dynamic is the same. monsters can only be 1. dead, or 2. under the control or supervision of a human/hunter. most end up dead, of course, but sam was always under the supervision of dean. it's at dean's discretion whether or not to kill sam in season 2, it's dean who's trying to get control of sam all through seasons 4 and 6. because of sam's self hatred about his monstrosity and "disappointing dean," he nearly kills himself at the end of season 8, and dean again makes major decisions for sam. the imbalanced dynamic between them is in large part because sam's humanity is always in question, and it's always up to dean to protect him, to control him, to put him down if need be. in supernatural, the imbalanced relationship btwn sam and dean is facilitated by the rules of the supernatural world, and it is because they can't break out of this power imbalance that they are so completely incapable of rethinking the system of hunting.

of course, it isn't 100% dean's fault. he was given the responsibility of Sam by john and by the bigger system of hunting. touga was groomed and most likely abused by akio, and it was only in imitation and admiration of akio that he abused nanami in the first place. in the context of hunting, it's dean's job to do harm, because that's the job that's been assigned to him by his father, the larger power system, and chuck. he was abused, and he also suffers by being forced into this role- he can't really connect with the people he cares about in a meaningful way. that's how the cycle continues.

the weird difference between the two? the system of hunting is never actually criticized, and the relationship between dean and sam is never addressed as abuse. so while revolutionary girl utena is a thoughtful and compassionate exploration of sibling abuse and gender, supernatural is a hamfisted action story that validates unhealthy family dynamics and eugenicist ideas about "monsters" that aren't really monsters at all. so at the end of rgu, utena and anthy break free of ohtori and akio. they end the cycles of abuse and are finally able to see each other outside of the roles prescribed to them by an abusive system. at the end of supernatural, the cycle isn't broken, the idea of monstrosity remains unrefuted, and sam and dean never see each other any differently than they always have.

[nmikaelsonimagines]

Choices: A Klaus Mikaelson Imagine

Request from Anon: could you write a fic set during season 3 where the reader is friends with the group (maybe she’s a Fell or something?) and is human and is weirdly drawn to Klaus but gets upset when he starts flirting with Caroline and she’s all like “of course he wants her. Why would he want me? I’m just a stupid, pathetic, weak human.” and she ends up confiding in Rebekah and Elijah (bc she’s good friends with them as none of the Originals tried to hurt or kill her) then either Klaus overhears or one of them tells him and Klaus confesses to her that it was all just a game to see how much he could annoy the group but in reality he likes the reader. Of course the group aren’t happy at all and makes her choose and she turns up at the Mansion with her stuff. You can decide how you want to end it :) 

Request from Anon: How about a fic set during 3x14 of TVD where the reader is part of the group but tries to stay out of a lot of the drama and she finds Klaus attractive. She is invited to the ball and goes even though she feels kind of stupid and not beautiful and sees Klaus and Caroline and realised that she will never be wanted or given a 2nd glance so leaves early. Elijah sees and goes to her house to see if she’s okay and she tells him everything. He then tells Klaus who confess his feelings for her?

Combined these two so I hope that’s okay! Hope this is okay for you lovelies, and enjoy x 

You weren’t supposed to be the protagonist in the story, always considering yourself to be more of a side character. The side characters didn’t fall for the villains, that was the job of the protagonist; she was the one who would make him realise that he wasn’t a bad person, would allow him to open up before she finally realised she was in love with him.

That wasn’t supposed to be you, but yet, here you were, feeling your heart break as the bad guy flirted with your friend, complimenting her on how she looked in the dress that he had bought her.

You weren’t supposed to be jealous, you weren’t supposed to be hurting, but when Klaus looked at Caroline like she was his entire world, you couldn’t help it.

No-one knew how you felt about the hybrid, and you were planning to keep it that way. Your friends already didn’t approve of the relationship you had established with Elijah and Rebekah Mikaelson, the more sophisticated of the two having become someone you could confide in, sharing your love of culture, of literature, of music, both of you trying to stay out of any drama that broke out between your friends and his family.

When the fights had cleared, you often both found yourselves exasperated, laughing about how your plans to stay out of it all hadn’t exactly worked.

You were sure Elijah had his suspicions about your feelings for his brother, clever enough to recognise a knowing look. He’d spoken to you tonight, and you were sure he had seen how your eyes had drifted to his brother, hoping he would notice you in a dress that when you’d put it on, you’d never felt more beautiful in.

You didn’t feel beautiful anymore.

You felt stupid. Pathetic. So boringly human.

Why would someone like Klaus Mikaelson ever fall in love with someone like you? Not when he had Caroline Forbes in his sight, her hair framing her face, every feature perfectly placed, immortality suiting her well. You didn’t resent Caroline for that; she was your friend, and a bloody good one at that, but for the first time in your life, you found yourself wishing she didn’t exist.

In order to quell more destructive thoughts, you turned, moving your eyes away from Klaus, trying desperately to avoid any more pain. No, it was time to go now. It wasn’t like anyone was going to miss you. You cornered a waiter and politely asked him to tell Elijah Mikaelson that you had gone home and you would see him tomorrow, before walking out of the Mikaelson mansion and going home.

Within a few hours, you were out of your dress, hanging it up on the door and sighing at the thought of never wearing it again; how many balls would you be invited to in your lifetime? You were in your pyjamas now, bed socks on, ready to settle down and watch trashy TV. You almost screamed when you opened your bedroom door to find Elijah sitting on your bed. He was staring at the television, which now broadcast some sitcom whose name you had forgotten.

“Really, Y/N. I expected better of you.”

“Why are you here, Elijah?”

“I came to see if you were okay,” he stood, turning off the television, “You left early. Why?”

“Wasn’t feeling well.”

“What was it? Headache? Nausea? Jealousy?”

Normally you would have snapped back with a witty comment, told Elijah that you didn’t know what he was talking about. But you were tired and you were hurting and you were self-loathing, and before you knew it you were crying and telling Elijah that you were head over heels in love with his younger brother who would never love you back because you were just a stupid human who clearly wasn’t that beautiful even when you were putting the effort in.

You didn’t remember Elijah putting you to bed, wrapping a blanket around you as you slept. You didn’t remember his promise to fix everything, before leaving to go and give his brother a good talking to.

The next day, you heard a knock at the door, expecting it to be your friends. They were on their way, Elena having woken you up with a phone call, explaining how they needed to tell you what they had discovered at the Mikaelson ball last night. You resisted telling her you really didn’t care, muttering okay down the line before hanging up.

So much for a lie in.

But when you opened the door, you were surprised to see Klaus Mikaelson standing there. He looked nervous, and it took you a while to register that he was really there.

“Can I come in?”

“Um, yeah, sure.”

He walked into the house, and you watched as he sat down. He rubbed his hands up and down his jeans, nerves suggesting that he had something to say. You decided not to push it, too tired for any Klaus Mikaelson drama, although secretly, it was a life you were hoping for.

“You left early last night.”

You couldn’t help the remark that slipped off your tongue.

“You noticed then.”

“I noticed a lot. You looked nice by the way.”

Time to cut the crap.

“Why are you here, Klaus?”

He looked up at you, and you resisted the urge to lose yourself in those blue eyes. For what you imagined was the first time since you had known him, Klaus Mikaelson looked sincere.

“Elijah told me.”

“Elijah told you what?”

“How you feel. About me.”

Oh.

“Oh.”

“That’s why I’m here. To tell you that you’re not stupid. If anyone’s been stupid, it’s me. All the flirting with Caroline, I didn’t mean any of it. It was all just part of some game to annoy your friends, and to- to make you jealous.”

Your heart was beating rapidly.

“What are you saying, Klaus?”

He stood up, taking your hands in his.

“What I’m saying, Y/N Y/L/N, is that I’m in love with you too.”

Your heart stopped beating.

You didn’t know who kissed who, whose idea it was to move back over to sofa, lips never leaving each other’s, didn’t care about any of it. All you knew was that Klaus was in love with you, that you were in love with him, and that you were no longer the side character that you thought you were supposed to be.

There was a spell cast on both of you in that moment, an unbreakable bond that you never wanted to break.

It was a shame your friends showed up just when things were moving along nicely.

Perhaps needless to say, it didn’t go down particularly well when your friends walked in on you and Klaus Mikaelson kissing. There was a lot of shouting, from both parties, noise that came to a head when you were asked a question that should have been difficult, but instead was so easy to answer.

“Well, make your choice. Us or him?”

The friends who didn’t really feel like friends or the man who had just told you he loved you, with a family who had time for you?

The next day you showed up at the Mikaelson mansion with your belongings, Klaus placing a kiss on your cheek when you’d moved in. He smiled at you, promising to give you the world. Always and forever. Out of all the choices you’d made in your life, this would turn out to be the best one.

It was the beginning of a new journey, of a better life.

Masterlist

[unforth]

Hello unforth! Thank you for your wonderful blog, and the the untamed art blog!! I followed you years ago for destiel, and you were one of the people that got me into the untamed. I watched it last summer and have been binging various cdramas ever since!! I had a question for you about reading. After watching the untamed I read the novel, and didn’t enjoy it as much as I thought I would. I think you’re someone who prefers the show, but if not, sorry if I’m remembering wrong… hoping you understand. I want to try reading other novels but I found the romance in mdzs to be kinda off. I guess I’m wondering if you have a recommendation for the best novel you’ve read so far? It would be great if it’s one with fanfic but if not I’m still curious to try! I hope this didn’t come off as rude about the untamed, it’s just a personal preference. Thanks in advance, and thanks again for all your work in fandom!

Howdy! *waves*

You have not misremembered, I definitely prefer the Untamed to the novel of MDZS (and I'm with you, no shade on people with different preferences, of course!). I also didn't enjoy the novel of MDZS as much as I thought I would, though I think some of that was because I read the Exiled Rebels Scanalations translation which - again, no shade, translating that was a HUGE job and kudos to them - but I do here from native speakers that some questionable translation choices were made, which can detract from some people's enjoyment of the novel (and can enhance other people's, it just depends how those translation choices relate to each person's personal likes and dislikes).

Now, I can tell you what I've read and what I've thought of each one, happily - I don't know what turned you off about MDZS specifically, beyond an aspect of the relationship dynamic, so it'll be hard for me to say which of these might appeal to you more? But, here's a list of which danmei novels I've read, and my opinion. The list is shorter than you'd think - danmei novels are long and I read slow, lol.

Note that all of these end happy, for various definitions of "happy," and the main ship is canon in all of them. Also note that I tried to avoid spoilers, but sometimes it's hard to even talk about the ship dynamic without some mild spoilers.

These are (roughly) in the order I've read them; I just finished the last a few days ago. All art is by the official artists, but I'm not always sure what their names are, sorry - I've tried to figure them out for my art blogs but it's REALLY hard.

1. Mo Dao Zu Shi, by MXTX.

(since I'm writing this post for you, and you're already familiar with it, I'm not putting in TW and plot)

My take: I figure knowing my opinion of MDZS will help you assess all this? There are things I loved about MDZS, including the book, but MDZS is still obviously trying to figure out pacing. Whereas in SVSSS, the storyline doesn't always flow that smoothly and the ending is rushed, in MDZS in my opinion the biggest issue is that she clearly didn't plan some things ahead. For example, Miangmian and Wen Ning are both introduced within a few pages of when they'll be needed to Do Shit. It shows that she hadn't quite worked everything out as she was going, and every once in a while was like, "shit shit I need a character for this thing" and hastily added them. The plot itself is better paced, though, though I could have wished for a less talky denouement. When it was the only one I read, I also often thought, "this author doesn't understand consent," and, "this author has kinks I don't share." Now that I've read all three of her books, I completely retract the first one. MXTX absolutely understands consent, and was intentionally playing with it in MDZS. Not sure if the evidence of that got lost in translation, or what, but...yeah.

Relationship Dynamic: ...the second of those opinions, I still kinda feel. The consensual non-con is just not really my thing, like I'm okay with it in small doses? And I don't love some aspects of Lan Wangji's domineering attitudes and Wei Wuxian's act of bare tolerating it. And don't get me wrong, now that I'm more familiar with her work, I think it was an intentional writing choice and I also think they're both largely roleplaying it a lot of the time...but I still don't personally enjoy it much.

2. Scum Villain Self-Saving System, by MXTX.

Genre: modern transmigration into a fantasy xianxia world.

Where to find it: English translation by BC Novels | donghua season 1

Trigger warnings for: graphic descriptions of suffering, non-con of the "fuck or die" variety, and body horror...I can't think of anything else rn?)

Plot: SVSSS is MXTX's first novel, and is a satire of classic stag harem novels. Shen Yuan, the protagonist and half the main ship, is reading a serialized web novel by "Airplane Shooting Towards the Sky" about a demon named Luo Binghe who has a harem of over 3,000 women and has done all kinds of ghastly awful things. He hates this novel but has read all, like, 3 million words of it or something, and trolls every chapter...until one gets him so angry that he dies...and then he wakes up in the book right around when the book starts, in the body of one of the early antagonists, a cultivator named Shen Qingqiu who abuses a young, innocent Luo Binghe physically and emotionally and, ultimately, is horribly tortured to death. Shen Yuan, in Shen Qingqiu's body, thus sets out to not be horribly tortured to death by Luo Binghe. Hijinks ensue.

My Take: In terms of my opinion of it...SVSSS secured for me that MXTX is a much more brilliant author than I thought when I'd only read MDZS. She understands tropes and subverts them brilliantly throughout the story, and from a writing standpoint, I was impressed with her. However, from a plot standpoint...she's got all the ideas but hasn't, imo, yet figured out how exactly to bring them all together. The pacing is off at times, and the ending felt abrupt to me. It's also the only danmei I've read where I ship a side ship more than the primary one (which is, of course, Shen Yuan (as Shen Qingqiu)/Luo Binghe. (also, oops...I read SVSSS after TGCF and just put them in the wrong order, oh well, not gonna change it now.)

Relationship Dynamic: In terms of relationship weirdness...it's hard to sort in that regard, because, like, it's supposed to be weird? I think it's a really interest book but I'm not sure I'd recommend it in your situation. Bingqiu's main dynamic is...uh...tolerance and obsession? They're kinda hard to describe. Shen Yuan often seems like he's just kinda putting up with Luo Binghe, whereas Luo Binghe is...god. So hard to describe, lmao. He's a big clumsy ox in a museum full of porcelain dishes and he really, really loves his Shizun. (also note that Shen Qingqiu is Luo Binghe's teacher. They don't get together until after they're not master/student, but if that's not your thing, another reason to avoid.)

3. Tian Guan Ci Fu, by MXTX.

(art is by Starember)

Genre: historical China (loosely), xianxia (note that I'm still figuring out exactly how stuff gets classified so sorry if I get one wrong, but I think I kinda get it???)

Where to Access It: English Translation by the astonishing yummysuika | manhua (this is an official translation by Bilibili! It's a few chapters behind the actual release, but still...) | donghua season 1 is on Netflix | a live action adaptation is juuuuust getting started on script reading and filing

Trigger warnings for: MCD, temporary MCD, body horror, graphic violence, epic levels of mind fuckery, uh...genocide?...again, racism/colorism, probably other stuff, sorry, I can't take as long as I'd like to for this post so I'm not being as thorough as I oughta be.

Plot: TGCF is about Xie Lian, an 800 year old man, and it commences at the moment when, unexpectedly, he ascends to godhood...for the third time. Unfortunately, when he ascends, he accidentally does some damage in Heaven, and he has to repay that, so he gets sent back to earth to deal with a ghost who's been causing some problems. Hijinks ensue...and then fucktons of angst ensue...then more hijinks...then more angst...and basically it broke my heart like four times and I am grateful for it every day? The main ship is Xie Lian and a ghost named Hua Cheng, but it's hard to even talk about without some spoilers because of some identity shenanigans. (they're VERY mildly identity shenanigans, but still).

My Take: So, you asked what my favorite of the danmei novels I've read is? It's TGCF. TGCF is one of my favorite novels ever, and it has a growing fandom, a donghua that's on Netflix, and a live action that's just starting to film. TGCF is the culmination of the skills MXTX developed through her first two works, imo. She clearly plotted it out all from the start, and while Book 1 especially often seems kind of random - lots of elements are introduced and then kinda...apparently...forgotten? And never explained? But she actually DOES bring it ALL together and it's flat-out masterful. I'm a big fan, obviously.

Relationship Dynamic: it again depends on your preferences and what you didn't like about MDZS, and there's no way to talk about it without spoilers, so consider yourselves warned. Xie Lian ascended to godhood first at the age of 17, and right around then he also saved the life of a 10 year old boy...and that boy is Hua Cheng. Hua Cheng is a follower of Xie Lian's, in that Xie Lian is literally a god, and Hua Cheng is literally one of his followers. However, they're separated for almost 800 years, so the age difference is largely irrelevant, and while some people complain about Hua Cheng's behavior being stalkery and obsessive, I honestly think they're dead wrong. It's more like when you read a celebrity/fan AU, and it starts weird, and then they really genuinely fall in love. Like, the fan may have been in love the whole time, and how they felt about the celebrity before they really met might feel slightly ooky, but it's how they act AFTER they meet their idol that matters more, and...yeah, Hua Cheng is great, they're both great, antis fight me. Xie Lian is easily one of my favorite characters EVER, he is all my favorite tropes in one horribly, wonderfully fucked up martyristic idealistic sweet kind laid back package. I would kill for him, lmao. In terms of their relationship dynamic...they love and respect each other? There's really nothing that weird about it other than the aspects of the "fan" Hua Cheng that get revealed over time - and he's always terrified that when Xie Lian realizes what a fanboy he was, Xie Lian will be upset or disgusted, but of course Xie Lian never is. They adore each other. It's glorious. Highly recommend. :D There's also no explicit content in TGCF (unlike MXTX's other two books).

4. The Husky and His White Cat Shizun (aka 2ha) by Meatbun Doesn't Eat Meat.

Genre: original world, xianxia, time travel, dimension hopping, it's so many things, 2ha is so hard to describe lmao

Where to Access it: English Translation by the amazing yummysuika (things are complicated, though, and it's not finished) | a manhua is in the works and should be out this year | a live action called "Hao Yixing" or "Immortality" is already filmed and could theoretically air literally any time cause it's completely ready, but when will it actually come? Who knows!

Trigger warnings: all of them. Literally. MCD, temporary MCD, murder, suicide, suicidal ideation, suicide attempt, rape/non-con, abuse, manipulation, gas lighting, torture, graphic violence, body horror, literal graphic onscreen horrible blood murder of a small child (I had to skip that chapter), teacher/student relationship sort of but not exactly, probably other stuff, this book is dark as fuck, and a lot of these tags apply to behavior of one half of the main ship toward the other, but...it's complicated, and there are reasons things happen, and those reasons aren't "well they're just a bad person."

Plot: This is another one that's hard to describe because there's sooooo much mind fuckery going on, but I'll try. 2ha is about Mo Ran, who rises to be the Emperor of the World, Taxian Jun, but slaughtering all who oppose him...and who is so miserable that he commits suicide, only to wake up in his 16 year old body. This is pretty much perfect from Mo Ran's point of view, because he's gone back so far that the love of his life, his fellow disciple Shi Mei, is still alive. He has a chance to fix everything that went wrong, starting with preventing his awful evil Shizun, Chu Wanning, from letting Shi Mei die.

Spoilers: the main ship in this book is Mo Ran/Chu Wanning.

Hijinks do NOT ensue. There are no hijinks in 2ha. It is all pain all the time (but I swear it ends happy).

My Take: ...well, from a structural standpoint there are some pacing issues. The book is incredibly long (over 300 chapters, over 1 million words) and there are definitely some chunks that could just be excised and it'd still be fine. However, other than that, it's pretty amazing and absolutely masterful how it's plotted. As a reader you'll spend 100+ chapters thinking you know what's going on, and who the good guys are, and who the bad guys are, and how they relate to each other...and then Meatbun starts in on revealing what's ACTUALLY going on and she then spends 200 chapters repeatedly punching you in the face! Like, I went in knowing a LOT of spoilers, because the tags were so dark that I felt that for my mental health it was important I have a general idea what was going on, and I STILL ended up sobbing my eyes out (and I am NOT an easy crier and don't usually cry at books) over something I knew was coming.

Relationship Dynamic: That's about the only thing that the title accurately conveys about this book. "The Husky and His White Cat Shizun," sounds so soft and fluffy, right? That's how they get you, ha. But, Mo Ran is absolutely a big dumb husky who wants to do the right thing (well, sometimes he does) but just completely fails depressingly often. When he sees someone he likes come in the front door he WILL jump all over them and bark in their face as his way of trying to communicate affection. And Chu Wanning is equally absolutely a cat. He is emotionally constipated, poor at expressing himself, uptight, touch starved, desperate for affection, and so lonely my chest hurts when I think about him. And for how they relate to each other...well, picture that big dog greeting a loved one at the door...except that loved one is the most hide-bound proud white cat you can imagine.

That's their dynamic.

(However, also...there are multiple timelines at play, and Taxian Jun does some truly awful things to "his" Chu Wanning in the original timeline, and many of these things are graphically described, and while it's ultimately all explained, it still all HAPPENS, so if you're going to have trouble reading fucktons of abuse between the main ship, I would not recommend this book)

5. Thousand Autumns (Qianqiu) by Meng Xi Shi.

Genre: historical China (like, references actual people, as far as I can tell), xianxia

Where to Access it: ...reading Thousand Autumns is HARD, it's split over like four websites/translators. This Carrd can kinda help? I can get you the rest if you want | donghua season 1 | I heard there's a live action in the works? But I don't know more than that.

Trigger warnings: graphic violence, mentions/threats of sexual violence (but it's all stopped before things really go wrong), starvation, description of child death (from starvation), near-death, emotional/mental abuse, major semi-permanent character injury, god, minor character death, they're major characters depending on your pov, I can't actually think of others, after writing about 2ha it feels positively fluffy). Note that there's not really any explicit content, just implications of smut, and not til basically the very end and extras.

Plot: Yan Wushi, sect leader of a demonic sect, has just come out of an extended seclusion to improve his cultivation when he and one of his disciples come across a man who is wounded to the point of near death. This turns out to be Shen Qiao, the sect leader of Mount Xuandu. When Shen Qiao awakens from his wounds, he's lost his memory, AND he's blind, and Yan Wushi decides it would be great fun and an excellent use of his time to fuck with Shen Qiao by trying to turn him evil - because Yan Wushi is certain that ALL people are inherently evil, and shattering Shen Qiao's veneer of righteousness will just help prove that.

Spoilers: it's not a veneer.

Not spoilers: Not many hijinks ensue, but there are a few hijinks, and even when it's not hijinxed, it's still not that painful...usually.

My Take: despite that synopsis, a lot of the plot of Thousand Autumns is actually political, and I like political plots, so I liked that aspect of it. However, it has some serious pacing issues imo, and it's also hard to read in English atm because it's not fully translated; it's close, now, much closer than when I read it a few months ago, so it'll be easier to read soon. Or maybe I shouldn't say it's pacing problems, but rather, it's more of a sequence of multiple major plots, strung together, with the growing relationship between Yan Wushi and Shen Qiao playing out in the background. I think if I'd known there was no "one big plot" that would have actually helped me, because it kept feeling like, "Oh, THIS is the main thing," but it never was. Things would feel climactic...except then there'd be more. So it's probably better to actually think of it as more...episodic? And the episodes/stories build, and interrelate, and do have a culmination, but not all of them directly tie in, and not all the threads end up coming together/getting resolved.

Relationship Dynamic: early on, Yan Wushi is definitely abusive and manipulative, intentionally so, and I would argue that, imo, Shen Qiao falls for it. However, mid-way through, there's some big reveals, and after that when they're reunited Shen Qiao no longer takes any shit and Yan Wushi continues to act like he doesn't care even when he clearly does. They're not a typical ship in ANY WAY, and I'd say their relationship is more founded on mutual respect than on love. Indeed, in the author's notes at one point MXS actually says they doesn't see them as the kind of couple to ever exchange love declarations, and I thought that was really interesting and it really helped me to understand how they worked together because I'll own I struggled with at times. Yan Wushi is self-interested, often cruel, and ethically and morally dubious. Shen Qiao, on the other hand, could probably ascend to Daoist godhood, he's so pure. Yet...they DO work. I'd say "opposites attract" but that's ALSO not their main trope, not exactly. They're a VERY hard ship to explain, and I know some people who've read the whole book and still don't really...get them...and I've had to really think about them to wrap my head around them...but the more I've thought about them, the more I like them.

6. Those Years in Quest of Honor Mine by Man Man He Qi Duo.

Genre: historical fiction set in either actual China or make-believe China, I'm not sure if this is directly incorporated any real people

Where to Access It: English Translation by Perpetual Daydreams | manhua (untranslated, I'm not sure if there's anyone translating it into English) | I think there's a live action in the works? Not sure beyond that though.

Trigger Warnings: suicide attempts, suicidal ideation, drug addiction, drug abuse, chronic illness (different character than the drugs), manipulation, abusive, awful parents and parental figures (not all, but definitely some), some homophobia (but way less than there could have been), probably other stuff

Plot: After 7 years away, Zhong Wan returns to the capital of the Empire with the three children of his benefactor, the seven-years-dead Prince Ning. Prince Ning was executed for treason against the previous Emperor, and Zhong Wan has done all he can to protect and raise the three kids, but he's got a lot of worries about returning to the capital and what could happen to his charges if they get pulled into the politics surrounded the Emperor. But, even worse, he's got even more worries about being reunited with Yu She, nephew of the Emperor, with whom he has more than a little history...and about whom he has been lying for the past 7 years, claiming that he is Yu She's lover, in a bid to help use Yu She's reputation to protect Prince Ning's children.

Hijinks ensue.

And so does a political nightmare.

My Take: TYQHM was a hard book to get into because there are just so many characters and it's all about politics - this is NOT a xianxia or wuxia novel, and these characters are NOT cultivators. There's basically nothing supernatural in the whole book; instead, it's about Zhong Wan and Yu She figuring out their own histories, and accepting each other, while trying to survive in a political world that increasingly wants both of them dead. However, I adore political plots, and when all was said and done I really enjoyed it, and I'm trying tooth and nail to claw other people into the fandom with me, so far with basically no success. It only has like 15 works in English on AO3. And so not only does it not fit that requirement of yours...

Relationship Dynamic: ...I think you would also probably not like the relationship dynamic? Zhong Wan is a bit like Wei Wuxian-as-Mo Xuanyu, except more...genuinely? Like, it's his actual personality, not an act, in quite the same way. I don't mean the "flamboyantly gay" part...usually...he definitely has his moments...but he's just...like, he's been through so much that he'll basically say anything, and drag himself entirely through the mud, to distract people who might hurt the three kids (they're like 16, 13, 13, now I think? It was never THAT clear to me, tbh...certainly, all are at least 10...) and, later, Yu She. He has zero face, and doesn't mind having negative face when he feels the situation demands it...and Yu She, on the other hand, has MAJOR depression issues, is sure he deserves nothing, and mostly wants to destroy everyone around him and then kill himself, at least until Zhong Wan starts giving him a reason to live again. But, more than that...Zhong Wan is like the fucking epitome of a bratty subby bottom. He wants to get fucked SO bad. And Yu She is an incredibly reluctant dom, hilariously so at times, uncomfortably/manipulative so at others. When all was said and done, I was pretty fond of them both, but there were definitely moments that made me grimace, and given what you say of how you felt about MDZS, I think this one is less likely to be to your taste?

Bonus 7: Guardian by Priest. I never finished the novel version of Guardian because the translation had some issues that caused me not to enjoy it, so I won't get into it too much, but again, Guardian is a very different book than any of the others, because it's modern fantasy(ish, like, it's still deeply embedded in Daoist-related tropes but it's more "magic spells" and less "cultivation." Like, in terms of what it's like, it felt more like Japanese modern Onmyoji style stories, to me, than it felt like the ancient Chinese wuxia/xianxia cultivation stories.). I'm not gonna get into lots of details, because I read part of the book more than a year ago, and have seen the show (which is VERY different) like three times, so I can hardly even remember what they're like in the novel. There was definitely some weirdness, though? If you're potentially interested, I'd suggest starting with the drama instead. The plot for that is...

Plot: Zhao Yunlan heads a Special Investigation Unit in the human world tasked with maintaining a treaty between humans and the dixigren ("undergrounders") who are (in the show) aliens (in the book...it's the world of the dead). While doing this job, he keeps running into this professor, Shen Wei, who definitely knows more than he oughta.

Hijinks ensue.

And then it murders you with feels.

The live action streams from YouTube - here.

(Warning: uh, I don't want to give spoilers, but my "guaranteed happy ending" does NOT apply to the Guardian TV show...but it does apply to the book, as I understand it.)

*

Anyway, this was a terrible use of my time but it was definitely more fun than what I should be doing, and it's probably way more information than you wanted or needed, but since I wasn't sure what exactly you had in mind, I figured...might as well be thorough?

(Today's hyper-focus fail: this post, ha...)

[fatehbaz]

On soil degradation and the use of non-native plants as weapons to change landscapes and sever cultural relationships to land; and on the dramatically under-reported but massive scale of anthropogenic environmental change wrought by early empires and “civilizations” in the Bronze Age, Iron Age, and ancient world (including the Fertile Crescent, Rome, and early China): I didn’t want to add to an already long post.

This is a Roman mosaic, from when Rome controlled Syria, depicting an elephant (presumably the Asian species, Elephas maximus) interacting with a tiger (the Caspian tiger, a distinct subspecies of tiger, lived in Mesopotamia, the shores of the Black Sea, and Anatolia up until the mid-1900s). This mosaic is striking to me, because I guess you could say that this is clear evidence of the higher biodiversity and more-dynamic ecology of the Fertile Crescent in the recent past, until expanding militarism and empire led to extensive devegetation. After all, does the popular consciousness really associate elephants and tigers with the modern-day eastern Mediterranean and Anatolia? Not really. But for the majority of human existence, lions, tigers, elephants, and cheetah were all living alongside each other in Mesopotamia. Pretty cool.

Anyway, I wanted to respond to this:

Which was in response to a thing I posted:

Pina: Thanks for the addition! I don’t know much about the technicality Rome’s devegetation of the Mediterranean periphery, but - like you - I’ve read some cool articles about it, and then forgotten to bookmark them. (I know that I have at least one good article in print form, about Roman devegetation; I’m going to try to find it.) I’m glad you mentioned it!

The first image is in the public domain and depicts a rhino-shaped ritual wine vessel made of bronze, from about 1100 to 1050 BC, during the Shang era. (The piece is housed at the Asian Art Museum of San Francisco.) The second image is another bronze wine vessel from a site in Shaanxi Province, this time inlaid with gold and hailing from later in history during the Western Han period, about 205 BC to 10 AD. (Photo by Wikimedia user Babel/Stone.) The rhinos in both of these pieces are depicted with two horns, meaning that they likely depict the Sumatran rhinoceros; this is corroborated by the existence of fossil remains of Sumatran rhinos from across China prior to 1000 AD.

On devegetation in the ancient world:

Yes, it feels like the ecological effects of empires prior to the Middle Ages are not just “under-discussed,” but dramatically overlooked. Some “quintessential and iconic African fauna” like lions and cheetahs lived throughout the Fertile Crescent, until devegetation during the late Bronze Age and, a few centuries later, the ascent of Rome. Caspian tigers (a distinct subspecies of tiger) also lived nearby, in Anatolia, the Caucasus, the shores of the Black Sea, and Persia - right up until the 20th century, in fact! (Other iconic species present on the periphery of ancient Mesopotamia were Asian elephants; leopards are still present.) Aside from the devegetation of the Fertile Crescent and the later landscape modifications of Rome, I also don’t see a lot of popular discussion (there is academic discussion, though, obviously) of ecological change in Zhou-era and early imperial China, either. While early Mesopotamia is famous for the amount of social prestige ascribed to irrigators and engineers, who were evidently essential to maintaining the domesticated crops so important to “hydraulic civilization,” early China (apparently) also revered irrigators and engineers. At least according to folklore and written histories, before the Han period, seasonal floods, especially in the Yangtze watershed, would regularly destroy human settlements. Also, there far more tigers, leopards, rhinos, and elephants present; rhinos and elephants lived as far north as the Yellow River until empire really expanded, and the animals lived as far north as the Yangtze River into the European Renaissance era. So, those people with the technical expertise to “tame the wilderness” by damming rivers or calming floodwaters were given prestige and sometimes treated as folk heroes. [Chinese history is not a subject that I really know a lot about. I’m just relaying the observations made in one of the better books on environmental history in East Asia, which is Mark Elvin’s The Retreat of the Elephants - 2006.]

------

On empires’ use of soil degradation to “sever connections to land” and “indirectly” destroy alternative or resisting cultures:

Seems that empire uses ecological degradation to enact a “severing of relations” (in Zoe Todd’s words). Basically: If you destroy somebody’s gardens, then they have to come to you to buy food. Furthermore, destroying someone’s connection to land will also harm their cultural traditions rooted in that land, eliminating a threat to the imperial cultural hegemony and erasing “alternative possibilities and futures” from the collective imaginary. (And destroying the imagination doesn’t just harm the invaded cultures, it also prevents the relatively privileged people living in the metropole or imperial core from “achieving consciousness” or whatever, wherein someone living in 150 AD Rome or 1890s New York City might imagine an alternative system and potentially dismantle the empire from within.)

It’s violence; destroying soil, cutting forests, it’s violence. But when empires destroy soil, they get to maintain a little bit of plausible deniability: “Ohhh, it’s not like we outright killed anybody, we just accidentally degraded the soil and now you can’t grow your own food. Damn, guess you have to rely on our market now, which also means you have to assimilate/integrate into our culture.”

Europe, the US, and the World Bank did this in West Africa after “independence.” They said “oh, yea, sure, we’ll formally liberate you from colonial rule.” But since the palm and sugar plantations were already installed, and many of the ungulate herds of the savanna had already been killed, what were new West African nations supposed to do? Miraculously resurrect the complex web of microorganism lifeforms in the soil? So what the US and its proxies are essentially doing is saying: “If you want loans, you have to keep the plantations and also install supermarkets to sell Coca-Cola.”

Todd: “The Anthropocene as the extension and enactment of colonial logic systematically erases difference, by way of genocide and forced integration and through projects of climate change that imply the radical transformation of the biosphere. Colonialism, especially settler colonialism – which in the Americas simultaneously employed the twinned processes of dispossession and chattel slavery – was always about changing the land, transforming the earth itself, including the creatures, the plants, the soil composition and the atmosphere.” [Heather Davis and Zoe Todd. “On the Importance of a Date, or Decolonizing the Anthropocene.” ACME An International Journal for Critical Geographies. December 2017.]

-----

On the use of non-native plants as a sort of “biological weapon”:

The use of non-native plants and agriculture to enforce colonization and empire is the whole focus of this influential book from Alfred Crosby. (I have some issues/criticisms of some of his work/theories, but his work is generally interesting.) Crosby popularized the term “neo-Europes,” and he proposes that European empires attempted to subjugate the native ecology of landscapes in Turtle Island, Latin America, Australia, etc., while attempting to introduce European species, cattle ranches, pastures, dairy farms, gardens, etc. in an effort to “recreate” a European landscape.

-----

Speaking of Rome’s devegetation of the Mediterranean: One of the famous cases of Roman devegetation that made the rounds recently was that of silphium. A couple of excerpts:

[From: The Original Seed Pod That May Have Inspired the Heart Shape This historical botanical theory has its roots in ancient contraceptive practices.” Cara Giaimo for Atlas Obscure, 13 February 2017.]

Silphium, which once grew rampant in the ancient Greek city of Cyrene, in North Africa, was likely a type of giant fennel, with crunchy stalks and small clumps of yellow flowers. From its stem and roots, it emitted a pungent sap that Pliny the Elder called “among the most precious gifts presented to us by Nature.”

According to the numismatist T.V. Buttrey, exports of the plant and its resins made Cyrene the richest city on the continent at the time. It was so valuable, in fact, that Cyrenians began printing it on their money. Silver coins from the 6th century B.C. are imprinted with images of the plant’s stalk -- a thick column with flowers on top and leaves sticking out -- and its seed pods, which look pretty familiar: 

[End of excerpt.]

Silphium is extinct now. There is a lot of conjecture about what, specifically, caused the extinction. But it looks like the expansion of Rome across the North African coast of the Mediterranean, and Rome’s development leading to soil degradation, is a likely cause.

-----

Thanks @pinabutterjam​  :3

The scale of ecological imperialism’s effects ... planetary, no escape. It’s exhausting.

[phoebehalliwell]

don't know if you answered this before but in what order would you rank the endgame couples - piper/leo, phoebe/coop, paige/henry? very curious

oh hmm i actually have never been asked this!! hmm this is difficult. okay so like. obvi before we begin i must offer a disclaimer here. i am a paragon of bad taste. let’s not forget my entire valentine’s theme was dedicated to prue & jack. we’re starting at rock bottom here. i also love projecting my own idea onto incomplete pieces to fill the gaps. like. like i get how there’s not a lot to love for paige and henry and phoebe and coop but in my lil brain they are all very complex and like fleshed out and i gotta a lotta beliefs. in fact. like. hmm. no i’ve already said i have bad taste like piper/leo are probably gonna sit at the bottom of the list for me just because i cannot craft them how i want bc they’re already solidified in canon. like. idk they’re an adorable couple all that the full nine yards or whatever but like. well for starters they’re not my favorite ship tropes and then on top of that again There’s A Lot Of Canon. and i am a narcissistic diva okay i wanna be able to fill in these gaps. so like. hmm at the top based solely on coupleness and the versions of them that live in my noggin it’s

phoebe/coop bc like hear me out man they’re like the embodiment of love. we’ve been hit over the head so many time how they’re the embodiment of love and like salvation and rebirth and renewal like!! like part of me wishes that we had introduced coop in s5 and given him more skin in the game but also if they fucked up this relationship i would have been so bummed bc it really is. it’s love!! like it is the embodiment of falling in love like phoebe is stone cold right and she’s kind of starting to accept that maybe she just doesn’t get it you know. maybe that’s it. she gets her column and she gets to help people find love and see like piper and leo at peak domesticity and like engage in love, but like, remotely.because it’s not for her. and then here comes this cupid who’s like no i’m gonna find you love which is a cute gesture but like she genuinely doesn’t believe she’s made for love she genuinely doesn’t believe she gets to have love but then you know like. like her eyes get reopened to the world around her yes she engaged with love remotely but she had become so far removed from it that it lost the feeling. she saw it but she saw the individual brushstrokes and then here comes coop and he helps her take a step back and see the painting. and like!!! it’s beautiful. and then of course there’s the added trope of like. falling in love with coop he’s supposed to help you find love and now you know what the hell you’re trying but like. you’re in love with him. but you can’t be but you are. like!! and then on coop’s side you know he’s a cupid he’s been doing this for centuries and his love for humanity is obvious and his love for love is obvious but this is new. and he doesn’t know what it is!! like he knows love obviously but he’s never like you know fallen in love. and he can’t recognize it because he thinks it’s impossible but the next think you know he’s got all those lovesick symptoms he sees in the couples he puts together and oh my god he’s in love with phoebe. and then of course both believe the other won’t reciprocate bc it’s out of the realm of possibility. but then the other does reciprocate!! they also just like. i mean all three couple do but like phoebe and coop maybe the most. seem like the type of people who just kinda get lost in watching their partner work. like when phoebe is having trouble with a letter for her column she like paces and mutters the letter out loud to herself like she’s the one asking it and like bareface in pajamas like a crazy person is just repeating the same thing over and over again and coop’s just fucking in love with her like look at her!! and vice versa i don’t think coop has really spent that much time being human i think he takes absolute delight in small things phoebe has just forgotten about but to see coop’s face light up like at so flea market or something finding something that was undeniably crafted with love like he can feel it imbued in the item and his face just lights up and he wants to tell everyone how like it’s love!! love!! it’s all around us it’s in here can’t you feel it and phoebe just looks at him and remembers how pure love itself is and just how happy she is that you know. this is her life. and she gets to fall asleep and wake up next to this man like hello?? hello??!???! and then i’m gonna go 

paige/henry bc like i feel like they’re criminally underrated again bc we spedrun what should have been a slowburn but they gave me the legos and i will built the death star like. like these are two people who struggle with family and identity so much who have learned against their nature to lean into and grow with one another. like what we see of paige is a woman who loves her independence and loves her freedom and yesh has a complex relationship with family bc she was given up at birth but it didn’t matter because she found a loving family so who needs the ones who gave her up not her but she couldn’t help but wonder but she didn’t care she had her family. until she didn’t. until she was seventeen alone and scared and what are you supposed to do with that?? and let’s not even get started on the fact she only gains her new family through death as well. like. there’s so much there there are so many reasons to stay guarded and fearful and just overall pessimistic about the concept of family especially as something built to last. and then henry!!! who never knew his birth parents and on top of that never got a home like paige paige got a home she got a family who loved her hell she actually got two henry never had that henry always had nothing and like he kinda grew up in that shell said he didn’t want to leave when people started getting close he had to push them away bc he didn’t know who he was if he wasn’t alone and paige is like hey hi?? you wanna be alone so bad be alone but i actually fucking like you and i know you like me too so don’t just push me out because that’s what makes you feel "comfortable” when you know you’re miserable in your comfort. and she’s right but it’s still a hurdle for henry and it’s this push and pull of the tides where bit by bit they kind of have to learn that it’s lonely up on the pedestal of independence and it can actually be nice to be vulnerable with somebody yes it’s fucking terrifying to just like show yourself to someone honestly because like!! they can turn away what if they turn away but to experience the rewards of love we must first subject ourselves to the morifying ordeal of being known. and it’s a painful process for both of them but the fruits of those labors man it’s well fucking worth it and it’s a relationship especially on henry’s side that is plagued with external insecurities other people telling him that he is not cut from the right cloth to be with paige but like. it’s like he’s already torn down his walls to be with her and she’s done the same and he realizes he loves her like He Loves Her like. like!! who gives a fuck what anyone else says he loves paige. and then paige reciprocates omg!!! haha fuck yeah. and then like i also think henry’s just super fuckin corny levels of domestic like makes french toast every sunday and fingerpaints with his kids and is in the dad’s club at the elementary school and just does all the things that he fuckin prayed for as a child  just a constant stable feeling of home of love and like. like!!!! i’m gonna bite someone like. paige&henry man.

piper/leo though as previously established is like Thee charmed couple you know they are there all eight seasons they get points for that but obviously from reading my first two ones i kinda just fill in a lot of gaps there which i am able to do bc each couple probably checks in at 150min of screentime total. piper and leo don’t get that so like i don’t get to do that. and like. the origins of them i just don’t quite get you know which was really just cause it was such a new show and this was a new lil relationship they weren’t sure what they were gonna do with it and then again like issues with canon and the whole whitelighter thing but what i would have loved to see more in the early stages is just like why. like obviously they both found the other cute but we never really got the Moments bc it was all so preferrial and then next thing you know leo’s dying in the attic and piper loves him like i would have loved the in between and a bit more of the internal monologue the jump then fall especially on leo’s part which is like canon’s fault but like. you know like why if he was a whitelighter and knew the rules blah blah blah and it was because the writers didn’t know but like. still you know. and then s2 was bogged down my dan and i just really didn’t care for it that much because like. idk i didn’t love a lot of leo’s vibes early s2 were he was trying to keep it strictly professional and just ended up coming across as weirdly bitter and possessive however i Loved him bonding with dan in pardon my past that was a nice touch. of course later seasons pleo really makes up for the lackluster of the early seasons bc they are just so domestic like they know each others strengths so well and leo loves piper’s cooking and they’re corny n cute and they have their little moment and i do mostly like their relationship therapy bits i like that that was incorporated bc like. it happens man it’s not something to keep taboo it happens. but i do feel like that shit was often resolved too quick and then the same shit dredged up ten minutes later like some one trick pony. i also love how ride or die they are points for that. leo’s like i killed an elder and piper’s like alright. they’re really in it through thick n thin n i respect that

[thefoxwhowanders]

Here's some character descriptions for my main characters from my story if anyone is interested! I used picrews to show you guys how they look! Also, I don't have a lot of time to draw them right now 🙃

Ingra is a strong-willed character who rarely hides her feelings, and even if she tries, it’s always written on her face. She can be blunt at times and says things without giving much thought to it. She has a tendency to say some of her thoughts out loud, because it helps her think. She’s always longing for knowledge and would ditch any party just to read a book. She tends to ask a lot of questions without thinking, because her curiosity sometimes takes over. If she is given the chance, she can talk for hours about anything and everything. She tends to keep to herself most of the time, because she’s afraid others will find her annoying, so she stays away. She would cry with you if you are sad and hug you while you cry. She may talk a lot, but she can be a good listener if you need her to be. She loves to dance more than anything, because she used to dance with her mother before the kidnapping. She would dance all day if she could. She also loves to sing, but she thinks she’s not that good at it even though she is.

Favorite color(s): Burgundy and cerulean blue

Favorite season: Spring 

Likes: Animals, dresses, jewelry, her parents, snow, soft music, flowy dresses, folktales, fairy tales, stories in general, books, knowledge and owls

Dislikes: loud music, beetles, spiders, pastel dresses on her, the king, slavery, and nosey people. 

Suirea is a person who tends to keep to himself when he can, and he avoids going to parties, because they make him feel uncomfortable even though he has to go to them. He would always sneak out of the palace during a party in disguise to get some time to himself. He has a tendency to put others before himself and his own needs. He doesn’t care about himself as much as he does for others which causes him to get hurt easily. He’s the kind of person who falls in love too easily or gets attached too easily. He’s a great listener, because he puts all his attention on you. He isn’t afraid to be open about his own feelings, because it helps him to talk about it. Other times, he just pushes the feelings away and tries to forget about them. He can be selfish sometimes when it comes to the people he gets attached to, but he tries his best to hide it out of fear. Suirea loves to paint and read and write poetry, because it calms him and makes him smile. He also enjoys sparring and archery.

Favorite color(s): Gold and green

Favorite season: Winter

Likes: poetry, memorizing quotes, big dogs, rain, birds, climbing, crafting, making things with his hands, roses, his sisters and his mother

Lucero is a character who tends to hide his feelings behind a smile. He's a person who does his best to make your day better when you're sad. He's always smiling, even when he's sad (sometimes) which can be a problem. He tends to make people laugh without even trying to be funny. He laughs pretty easily, because he finds mostly everything funny. When he has to be serious, he will be serious. He can be a little reckless sometimes, and oblivious. He has a tendency to daydream a lot, and completely forget any task at hand. Lucero can easily tell if someone is in a bad mood without even having to talk to them. He likes to go to all the festivals and parties, because he enjoys them. He can be a little blunt, and he isn’t afraid to say what’s on his mind. When it comes to showing affection to others, he does it frequently. He would hug you all the time if he can, but he knows that some people can feel uncomfortable if he does that, so he restrains himself. He would tell you he loves you a million times if he can, and throw compliments at you 24/7. He’s not afraid to tell you exactly how he feels about you. He sometimes thinks he has an annoying/overbearing personality, so he tries to say things that he thinks people may not find annoying. Lucero loves to dance, which is an interest he shares with his closest friend Ingra because they both love to dance. He loves to bake and cook because it was one of the things he loved doing with his mother whenever his father wasn’t home. Astronomy is a subject he adores, he could talk about space for hours and hours. He also loves making origami for fun.

Favorite color(s): Red, and black

Favorite season: Summer

Likes: Dancing, baking, his mother, cooking, making origami, cats, astronomy, Ingra (not romantically), daydreaming, sewing, jokes, laughing, talking, partying, and festivals.

Dislikes: his father, being annoying, being alone, rain, loud noise, phonies, cruel people, and bullies

Asante is a person who puts her duties before her interests. She is the kind of person who would put all her focus on something and forget to take care of herself. She is usually a composed person, but she will knock you down if you attempt to hurt her friends, her people or stand in her way. She is wise for her age, and there are times where people think she is older than she actually is. She loves her culture and her people more than anything. She would do anything for them even sacrifice her own life for them. She isn’t afraid of people hating her for what she believes in. She is understanding and does her best to listen even when you disagree with her. She loves to joke around a lot, and she can be sarcastic, but she does her best to not ever cross the line. She loves to be around people and party if she feels like it. She has a tendency to overthink things and worry a lot to the point of keeping herself up all night. She’s the kind of person who would write down all your favorite things on a piece of paper and try to memorize them later. She loves to cook and clean when she’s feeling tense or angry because it calms her. She also loves history and different cultures.

Favorite color(s): dark blue, and red

Favorite season: Winter

Likes: Cooking, jokes, butterflies, culture, people, history, food, long naps, sitting around the fire, her mother, and sewing (she likes to sew her own clothes)

Dislikes: Sweets, liars, waking up early, fake people, and being alone (she doesn’t dislike a lot of things

Since Alexandria was a child, she has always been self-conscious about her body and herself. People would always make fun of her for being chubby and overweight to the point where she began to hate herself. As she got older, she began to ignore all the comments she received from others including her parents. She stopped caring about what other people thought of her, but sometimes it still affected her when someone called her something she was not. She tried her best to not care about her appearance, but whenever she looked in the mirror, all the negative words said to her began to surface and come out. Alexandria likes to doodle on her hands when she’s bored and play scenes from her favorite stories with her older sister. She isn’t afraid to try new things whether it’s a new dish or a game she’s never played before. She can be a bit stubborn, but if she knows she’s wrong then she will try to understand. She doesn’t like when people worry about her and she likes to fight her battles by herself rather than asking anyone else for help. She likes to do everything by herself without ever wanting to ask anyone for help, because she didn’t want people to think she’s weak. She tries to be strong and brave even when she feels weak. 

Favorite color(s); Pink and Lavender

Favorite Season: Fall

Likes: Doodling, acting, stories, games, puzzles, soft music, her sister, gardening, waking up early, sweets, playing in the leaves, spicy food and rain.

Dislikes: her parents, her older brother, being forgotten, being hated, nuts, and parties

He’s a silent man, who chooses to speak only when he needs to most of the time. He barely speaks because he prefers to keep to himself, because he believes no one would care about what he says anyways. As a kid, he was always smiling all the time so he has smile lines on his face. He also loved to play the piano when he was younger but he hasn't touched the piano ever since. He's become a shadow of the person he once was after his family was murdered. Rogue takes it upon himself to take revenge and find the people who killed his family. He stops using his given name on that day and takes the name Rogue, because he believes he doesn’t deserve the name his father gave to him after the things he did. He grew up with a loving family, and a dream of one day becoming a musician, but it all changed after that day. Even though he doesn’t speak a lot, he does listen and pay attention. He also cares in his own way like giving someone a larger portion of food while he gets the smaller portion or giving someone his cloak when they are cold. He would be the kind of person to buy you a nice and thoughtful gift, because of how much he pays attention. He keeps a small flute he carved himself in his pocket at all times, because he likes playing it. 

Favorite color(s): Red

Favorite season: Winter

Likes: playing the piano, archery, counting the stars in the sky, playing the flute, music, nature, and the sound of birds chirping in the morning, 

Dislikes: the king, talking, the cold, and loud noises (he doesn’t really dislike a lot of things)

(He has elf ears, but I can only choose one bc of the 10 image limit 😭)

Ren is a shy character who likes to keep to himself most of the time, but he does speak a lot once you get to know him. He gets embarrassed pretty easily, and he can be clumsy sometimes which is funny, because you would never expect it from someone like him. He doesn’t like when people give him compliments, because he doesn’t know what to say in return. He always has a serious face, and it’s rare to see him smile. He tends to blush a lot whenever he’s complimented, because he isn’t used to it. He has a hard time showing affection and returning it, because he never received a lot of affection in general. When someone asks him about something he loves, he gets really passionate about it and excited; he can talk about it for hours if you asked him too. Whenever someone jokes around with him, it takes him a while to realize it’s a joke so he always laughs late. It’s also hard for him to detect sarcasm, so he always takes it seriously whenever someone is being sarcastic towards him. He’s the kind of person who would find dad jokes funny and try to make some himself. He’s pretty intelligent, but he can be a little clueless sometimes. He also has trust issues, because whenever he becomes attached to someone, they always end up leaving him once they know his secret. Ren isn’t ashamed of being an elf, so he likes to walk around without hiding his ears even though he gets a lot of stares and hate from others. Ren doesn’t like hugging or touching people, but he doesn’t mind when someone does it back to him as much. He loves archery which is why he keeps a bow and arrow on him at all times. He loves to play the lyre his father gave him whenever he’s outside in nature, because it calms him. 

Favorite color(s): silver

Favorite season: Spring

Likes: playing the lyre, nature, solitude, dad jokes, fishing, being outside, archery, hiking, reading, math (yes, he loves math), gardening, sweets, quiet and swimming 

Dislikes: The cold, parties, crowds, spicy food, compliments, and loud noises

I still have two more characters I'll add later! Yeah, here are my characters! Tell me what you think of them? Which character or characters are your favorite so far? If you have any questions, just ask and I'll do my best to answer!

Tagging some mutuals! @insane---chaos @oscar-fairchild @nolu @mitsuhamiyamizi @idontgetit-whydoihavetosaymyname @ineedadrinkorsleep @older-brother-kit @idontgetit-whydoihavetosaymyname @brotherhalal-ariahs @fieryfantasybooklover @ghostlivvy @zzoyalantsov @purplebass @vxnya-hxrgreeves @morgnstern @anxiousbookenthusiast @theprinceoftheaire @themostawesomehuman