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roseriot2191 · 1 year

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Entry 1/Introductions

hey!

so i really havent used tumblr before really so im not sure if this is the best place for what im doing but regardless im posting it here

~welcome to my blog~

the purpose is to document my life as a whole but its also my senior year so even more reason to record it!

this blog will be my safe space to spill anything, the good and the bad, of my upcoming life. in all honesty im not sure how well ill keep up with posts or how much effort ill end up putting into them but i will try to update at least once a week for sure.

ok so now onto me :)

hello again! im rose, i use he/they pronouns and i am 17. for anyone wonder, which i dont know why but i guess i can just state it to get it out of the way, im a cis queer guy. i use queer as my label because i very much dislike labels for myself lmao. im attracted to men way more often than not but if the right person for me isnt a guy the im not going to let gender/sex get in the way of love and im not sure pansexual really fits the way i feel. queerness ill say is a part of me but not something i identify with as much as i did in middle school. ill make a separate post about this perhaps. (ill mention that my name isnt actually rose irl and its just my pen name for the blog. i have no reason to be secretive really besides to hide my identity from friends, family and people who think they might know me, especially with the topics i might write about, but also i didnt put too much effort into disconnection rose and myself so if youre one of my irl friends, hi :p ) i am a high school student, but i am mostly taking college classes at a community college. im a photo major! photography is a recent thing that i started basically the same time i started college. i sorta took a leap into photo classes and decided that i might as well major in it since ive always been a creative person and since my high school was paying for my tuition. honestly college has been really fun but its school and sometimes i get burnt out really easily which sucks. ill probably talk about this more some other time. i havent really decided on a style of photography that i prefer yet but this fall ill start a portraiture lighting class as well as a color theory class, both im really excited for.

recently ive found myself changing or perhaps growing into a more typical "teenager" recently. this growth is a drastic change from who i was as a kid and that sort of scares me but i think i like the idea of who i can become. i started taking an interest in cars which sort of came out of know where. it might be because i got my license last december and have been driving a lot more but its also rooted in my ex too. (at the begging of this summer i got into a relationship with this guy who was my first everything, and we also ended it in july which hurt hella but again this is a topic for another post later) he was a total car guy and it was something we were bonding over. he would teach/talk about cars and i listened and started to take an actual interest. we went to a few car shows and it was honestly a prefect date/hangout for us because he liked cars of course but i also got to bring my camera and take photos. definitely something i miss doing. my first car was a 2004 honda pilot. it was a manual and i tried learning how to drive it and i got the gist but ended up selling it and getting an automatic 2006 honda pilot lol. this car ive had since february and its lowkey dying now which pisses me. my grandpa was the one who ended up buying it for me which i appreciate very much dont get me wrong but he bought it off these sketchy guys and didnt get it checked out right away for any problems and now im paying extra money in repairs. currently im trying to save for something more "extra" like a mustang or a bmw or honestly an older honda like a prelude or accord, though on my salary as a host in a small restaurant i have barely $4.5k saved and i started work about the same time i got the 06 pilot. i know these cars are a bit on the pricey side but im giving myself till new years to save for something and if i dont find anything by then, ill keep my money in savings for college after i graduate. (that is with the hopes my 06 pilot lasts me through that long :,) )

so yeah. i work as a host at a restaurant. its my first job and i honestly really like it. i get paid $16.50 an hour and i get tipped out by the waitresses on top of that. on average i make about $500 in a pay period which is two weeks. i wish i had more hours but also i dont. i usually use work as an excuse to procrastinate or completely ignore school work which is really self destructive because i convince myself that im productive but in reality i need to be more focused on school. my work ethic is pretty good though i think. i always say yes if someone needs a cover or if i need to come in ealry/on a day off. after the break up i took a bunch of extra shifts and started taking caterings for longer hours and to keep me busy. in the past 2 pay periods i clocked about 50 hours each and made $850 each. this has again been really nice for savings but not for my summer classes. this pay period i had a double catering and i should clock in about 40 ish hours. ill have one more pay period after this one before i will talk to my manager about scheduling me only friday-sunday and see about scheduling me caterings more rather than hosting since i make more that way. theyre pretty good about accommodating hours/days which is really cool but my manager always complains. i feel bad but also i really shouldnt because i need to do better in school first and i already do so much more than what i get paid for honestly so she really doesnt have any reason to say anything. (especially since we just hired 3 new girls after the summer hires left) all my coworkers love me but also everyone shit talks eachother behind their backs so i always wonder if they say anything about me lol. if they are then they should put that energy somewhere else because how are you guys gonna shit talk a 17 year old when you all are 25+???

my music taste is the opposite in regards to changing drastically. i find myself returning to the music i grew up with and even expanding with similar artists. for a quick family overview my step dad who raised me since i was three was/is a tattoo artist and very much in the punk scene. my mom was in the artistic performance and alternative scene. both these adults raised a very punk baby with all the classics and now like i said, after not really interested or listening to music often for awhile, im back to my roots. this is very comforting however when me and my ex were dating he was a big influence in the reintroduction. so do i corrilate some music to him? yes. does it hurt? im not sure. its very confusing but i listen to it on blast regardless and will most likely have hearing problems by the time im 30 T~T a lot of what ive been listening to on repeat is radiohead which was "our band" and i still think it is. im a very sentimental person and cant/wont diconnect these feelings probably ever. i do this a lot. this time though i havent had the urge to stop listening which is a reliefe because i enjoy the music but also because i think itd hurt me if i found hate or sadness in the music rather than the love and bond we once shared through these songs. something ive been considering is posting a song with every post or at the very least at the end of the week. maybe even a playlist at the end of the month? not sure yet. i think music tatse is something that changes with me all the time so its something worth recording here. oh also i def will post cd hauls here too! i have a small collection started but definetely wanna get more.

lets see i dont read often but my favorite books are alice in wonderland, the warden's daughter, they both die at the end, coraline and currently i am reading solitaire by alice oseman. ive read her heartstopper series and have taken a serious interest in tori's story. for my favorite shows i binge watch shows so often and then forget about them just as fast as i watch them lol. i really like soul eater, downtown, daria, the midnight gospel, the walking dead, initial d, madoka magica, and some others i cant think of right now.

hmm~ i cant really think about anything else to write at the moment, plus ive been typing for awhile and should get to bed, so i think ill end it here.

i dont really expect anyone to read this blog in all honesty but its something i wanna do for myself and if a few people take interest or relate to anything i talk about i think thats enough :)

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vampirerite · 1 year

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big post on my thoughts and compiling stuff from twitter as well. keep in mind this is mostly speculative.

it seems the majority of the cast of paper moon will be from extra or extra-faces. which makes sense due to the remake coming up, theyre revisiting the material. there were a lot of silhouettes for this trailer so i actually expect some new low stars*, we havent had any for a long time.

first thing of note is the subtitle is “Imaginary Compass”, so we can expect heavy kama and sakuraface focus this chapter. especially after the preview. maybe even expect this to be a stealth sequel to Imaginary Scramble.

Full CM here. so here we have Lev, Alternate Ranru, BB, Shinji, and ???. These appear to be our participating masters for this chapter. I would say dont expect any of them to be playable but...

heres that lineup i mentioned earlier. we clearly have Rani on the left, and Adult Sion and Lev on the right. everyone inbetween them is a bit of a mystery. But the numbers come out even if theyre supposed to work as servant/master duos in this chapter, since we know Lev summons (or at least works with) Prince of Lanling.

We should also note thats only 5 participants, 6 if the protagonist is counted when they show up. Which means expect a character to appear that is not previewed at all in this. If theyre hiding in the line-up, its not obvious.

its pretty safe to assume Bhima and Duryodhana are rogue or Chaldea aligned from the jump.

Also, for the Extra-face summons we can assume theyll repeat what they summoned previously. So Rani = Berserker, Shinji = Rider, Ranru = Lancer. the BB face is up in the air, since BB was originally a Ruler class but then invented the Mooncancer class for FGO.

The real wildcard is the mystery girl in the main preview, as she could be. so many things. she doesnt seem to be in the lineup either, unless they purposefully chose an ascension that hides her.

I didnt see that many actual story hints. Clearly were dealing with Atlas Academy, and Sion will be our main focus alongside Kama. Im not shocked by Lev’s return, since the writing team seems to still want to utilize the god pillars (probably because theyre cool as fuck) and they brought back Olga. Theres a lot of characters with two toned hair so you could say theres a visual theme of duality but nothing concrete about that yet.

Overall i have no clue whats going on but it feels ambitious. Dont Fuck It Up.

*something to note that banner 2 is likely going to drop around 6/25, which is a whole month before anniversary which was the last time they did a huge fp pool update. if they have something else planned, or are scheduling to trickle everything theyve built up for anniversary over the month, then it could make sense. its just very odd to see the dev team go from famine to feast if they really plan on releasing everyone here for this chapter.

#skeletxt

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dufrau · 2 years

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Alight bud, it's time.

2, 13, 20, 26 (I know you make, but the details!!), 36, 40 and 48

also 34 makes me cry a little.

Hoo boy lets go!

2. Describe your favorite pair of socks: I hate wearing socks honestly. I am barefoot as much as possible and in the summer I wear vans without socks. But I also like boots a lot so I need socks for those. I guess the pair I wear the most are like mid calf and they are purple and grey striped. Although I did buy some heavier winter socks this year that are like buffalo check plaid, I just havent worn them enough yet to give them the honors.

13. Do you prefer to write in pen or pencil? I like ballpoint pen a lot, for writing and (heretically) for drawing. But I dont have any ballpoint pens right now, I just have gel pens and I kind of hate them. I would take a pencil over a gel pen. I like the idea of fountain pens and I 100% understand why people collect them, but I am too messy I think to make good use of them. My handwriting looks like a serial killer's no matter what implement I use.

20. What kind of math are you best at? Addition and subtraction of single digit numbers. I only made it to Algebra 2 and I barely passed that class. Matrixes broke my brain. I can figure out what 20% is to tip people and that's about as mathy as I prefer to get.

26. Can you cook or bake? If so, what are some of your specialties? Yes. I am a very good cook, and good enough at following recipes to be a passable baker. The things I can make without really even thinking about it are roast chickens, basically any kind of beef stew or chicken soup, steaks, bbq chicken. Carnitas for tacos. I yolo salads, they always come out good. Heart kind of home cooking kind of stuff. Nothing fancy really. But its good and nobody goes home hungry.

36. What’s an arcade or table game (air hockey, ping pong, etc) that you’re really good at? Does beer pong count? Because I have had some triumphant moments at that. I would love to be good at pool but Im just not, and none of the super fast paced stuff works out great for me because number one im getting old and number two i am generally drunk if im playing games. I used to be very good at Big Buck Hunter but it's been a while since I've played so I'm probably pretty rusty.

40. What’s your favorite kind of tree? There was an apricot tree randomly along Pearl street in cambridge near my old apartment, just hanging out over the sidewalk. It was a weird place for a fruit tree, very urban and busy, and it didnt seem like anybody ever picked fruit from it because every year the sidewalk would get just absolutely disgusting with it. But I liked that tree because it was unexpected and neat. There's a sapling in our front yard that I was hoping was an apple tree but Im pretty sure its not. I like fruit trees I guess. It's just wild that you can plant a tree and ignore it and it will just rain fruit down on you. A miracle!

48. Do you have a favorite plate or bowl? No favorite plate. We have a multicolored set of bowls and I am partial to the lighter blue one because a lot of the bowl food I make is orange/reddish and I think it photographs well in a light blue bowl. I have a favorite beer mug, a fat little round keg shaped mug we got at Schilling brewing last fall. And I have a favorite wooden spoon, it's slightly rounded but has a great scraping edge on it for deglazing. And my favorite wine glass is a mason jar.

And BONUS QUESTION 34 yes i can read a clock. Genius confirmed!

(questions from this post)

#asks #a little bit of everything i guess???#this blogger does not math

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mybettertomorrow · 7 days

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It’s been almost a year. Things have changed, and yet they remain the same. Still in Paris, but now working. The friends I met in October of last year made the whole year incredible. I lived things that I never thought I would. The girl I met is still in my life, but just as a good friend. As I suspected, I had my heart broken when I realized she didn’t feel the same way. The tougher thing was seeing her fall for, not one, but two different guys since. Oh well. I did discover that she appreciates me as a friend, and I grew out a bit from last year’s crush, thank god.

Here’s the reason Im writing. Since classes finished in June, I’ve felt like shit. Specially since August started. I started at my internship, my friends went on holiday and my cousin left again. All of a sudden I was alone and bored in a foreign city. And it feels like this has caused me to doubt everything. How good I am at my job. If I even want my job. Was it a good idea to leave home. Did I make the right choice with the friends I made. Why haven’t I been honest about myself to anyone.

All of these thoughts visit me everyday. At other points in my life I’ve been able to pull myself through, but I’ve never felt as lost as I do now. Maybe it’s the loneliness, or the fear. Or perhaps the shame. The worst part is that, for the first time in a really long time, I’ve been thinking about self harm. It’s super scary, because I’ve never felt as close to it as I do now. Im trying to find the way out, by any healthy means necessary. I have tried to talk to friends about the way I feel, Im working out a lot and trying to keep a routine. And yet they come. To be honest, I think it stems from the fact that I left home to live the life I always wanted. Now Im away, and Im still not living it because I guess Im more afraid that I thought I was. I miss home like crazy, but I feel like I cant go back until I break out of this self made prison. But I’ve been away for a year and Im still inside. So I guess I have to start being true and honest about who I am to actually get what I need and want. Im so scared of disappointing people, or having everything change for the worst.

I couldnt sleep tonight, so I went on Youtube. For some reason I thought of Abbi Jacobson, and as I was watching videos of her, I remember this interview of hers that was posted in September of 2022. I remember watching it and feeling so… I don’t know, like understood? But I remember later that night not being able to sleep because I kept thinking how I felt like I could never be fully honest with myself unless I left home. It’s like I had this burning feeling in my chest telling me to do everything in my power to leave, that if I didn’t I would always regret it. 2 years later, Im laying awake on my bed in Paris, far away from home, but not yet being honest.

Therefore, I really want to be more honest. I cannot long for a life this bad and not do anything to live it. The truth is that Im bi. I havent said it to anyone, and Im terrible afraid of doing so. But now I’ve realized that I cannot be happy if I don’t say anything. I’ve been repressing myself my whole life to fulfill what I think others expect of me, and Im so unhappy because of it. I don’t know when I’ll come out, but I really hope it’s soon. I dream of having a partner literally every single day, but Im too scared to say it out loud because I feel pathetic. I want it so bad, but do nothing about it. So I will actually do something about it, I owe it to my future self laying in bed awake in the middle of the night, next to the person they love.

Last bit. I think I don’t like my career. Thats a big oopsie on my part. I have an idea of what I would like to do, but it’s so broad and idealistic that it feels stupid. However, I will try to find my way there. Im so worried of feeling the call to art and not following through, I know I will regret it if I don’t.

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crplpunkklavier · 7 months

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KVK AU ask: So how would Edgeworth fit into this? And how much of Apollo's backstory would be canon?

oh i generally ignore apollo's canon backstory in all of my writing, because i don't like it and i haven't played past aa4 lol. what i would keep is that he didn't grow up with his biological family. i would give him and trucy a bigger age difference, so post-trilogy the gramarye case would still happen, and apollo would take in his (very) little sister.

also, since greg edgeworth (gredgeworth if you will) didn't get shot by manfred, miles grew up with his loving dad. which i'll be honest.... DOES tempt me to make him a defense attorney instead of a prosecutor. phoenix in aa1 says that if he'd known larry took miles' lunch money in school, he would have become a prosecutor, so it's very funny to me to imagine a world where miles stayed in school with them, followed in his dad's footsteps, cleared up the class trial thing, and then miles went into defense and phoenix went into prosecution. because i honestly will also take any opportunity to think about prosecutor nick. love that guy.

again i havent thought about nick and miles in this AU much yet, so this is all sort of me freestyling rn. initially i had just imagined that miles had grown up sort of sheltered, ventured into the prosecutor's office, immediately got manipulated by kristoph gavin and disbarred apollo. but now that i've thought about it it's way funnier if apollo justice had to deal with a teenage prosecutor phoenix wright taking his badge away. klavier returns to LA and immediately gives this twink a wedgie

#anonymous #kvk #i dont really care for wrightworth in any setting so this isnt where my mind has been #mainly i think about klapollo holding mvk down and beating him to death and also klavier and franziska yelling at each other over dinner.#but this is fun dont get me wrong. unhinged prosecutor nick is one of my secret obsessions

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bubsub69 · 1 year

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Entry 22

10/10/2023 00:20

I dont understand, I finally have someone, why am i not feeling different, I thought I'd at least feel something from having a goddess but it just feels fake, it feels like I'm faking it, like shes faking it why cant I just be happy with it. Im probably overreacting, these things are about trust and after having so so many people asking for money I dont feel like i can trust anyone. When she first started talking to me I answered her questions on autopilot, I didnt care about anything, it was just like i was filling a form, I had other people approach then ask for money on discord hours before she contacted me, how was i suposed to know she was gonna be the one that didnt require them, and thats the thing she said:

So just to be clear between us. I won't be asking you to pay tribute probably because you're in college.but that doesn't mean you shouldn't show your mistress appreciation out if your own free will whenever your mistress deserve to be gifted. Hope we're clear on that. I don't do findom.

So does she expect me to pay at some point? is that her plan? play the long game have me hooked to her so i cant refuse paying her or i risk losing her? I havent received any verification from her either which isnt helping especially since ive sent pictures to her, and she refused a videocall for me to lock myself because I "hadnt earned it", she also found me im assuming from the chaster server but shes never posted there before, fuck writing this is making me distrust her more and more. Shes trying to get to know me she… might be doing it so i get feelings for her and pay up.. GOD DAMN MY FUCKING INSECURITY WHY CANT I JUST TRUST HER. I'd rather be happy now and cry later than be miserable now and cry later anyway if she ordered me to pay.

I dont even know if she enjoys this, she has multiple servants so that doesnt help.. she takes a long time to reply. while she isnt really the degrading type, actually shes been calling me good girl a lot but that just feels hollow.. maybe i should try to ask to be called good boy, that sounds a lot better in my head, but shes into feminization and sissification what if she doesnt agree or stops liking me because of it, i need to talk to her about this were suposed to be honest to each other but im so scared of her losing interest in me i dont know if i should tell her goddamnit im such a piece of shit to her. im not even being honest about her being the only one cause im also kinda doing a chaster session, but that ends when the timer runs out but still im being dishonest with her, the one fucking requirement in a healthy relationship and i cant even give that to her, i was right before i dont deserve to be in a relationship, im not mature enough for it, if i cant even give her honesty, nor can i trust her, nor feel anything when i do submissive tasks. Im such a piece of shit.

School has been troubling as well, the theory classes are so soul crushingly boring, i just delivered my first project that came out like shit cause i was incapable of working on it and procastinated for 90% of the time, this whole year ive been struggling to work or study in anyway while home im gonna be fucked arent i

So much for happy entries.. i wasnt even happy when i wrote it yesterday just mildly hopeful, i hope this changes soon, please let me be happy with her, plese.. let me forget about D as well Im so sick of being stuck thinking about someone that doesnt care about me. I wish i at least lived close to the new goddess so i could at least entertain the ideia of meeting up and cuddling or something, god that would be nice

#diary

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brassknucklespeirs · 2 years

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Tᴏ Bᴇ Nᴇᴇᴅᴇᴅ [Lᴇᴡɪs Nɪxᴏɴ x ꜰ!ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ]

Genre: Sad fluff

Warning: Depiction of concentration camps, depiction of reader hurting herself on purpose, general war stuff

Prompt: Request from @vibing-away “Alright, can you do this trope with a few minor changes? The reader is known to be calm and composed. Her general unwavering happy demeanor got the company through tough times, but she bottles up her own until she breaks. Bonus, if the reader is vulnerable and quiet for a period after.”

Post is: “the single most heartbreaking and hard hitting trope in media is when the light-hearted joker character that usually makes everybody else laugh and lightens up the dark situations with their presence alone breaks down crying and literally just can't stop because then you know it's really very seriously awfully sad for real” from @rocksalt-and-pie

A/N: i havent proofread this so sorryyyyy, also this isnt my best writing but it’s been sitting in my draft for a few days bothering me so i decided to just finish it and post it before i go insane

Most of Easy company had begrudgingly learned that Germany was a beautiful country, contrary to the painting they had been creating in their minds, with no dark, menacing clouds and lurking figures around every corner. Y/N, on the other hand, knew it would be a sight to see, and aside from the clearly uneasy faces of the locals who had to deal with this new infill of rather harsh American soldiers, the town they had settled in was bright and held a strong sense of European class to it.

The officer in question had been thinking this with a look of fascination as she wandered around the cobblestone streets, taking in everything she could around her when she heard the news of Captain Nixon’s return from his drop with the 17th Airborne Division. Her once calm smile morphed into a look of excitement, her lips tugging even further across her cheeks as she thanked the messenger sent for her before she took off into a sprint to the temporary officers’ housing. Her feet carried her past several of her men who all smiled fondly at the woman, their eyes following her after she passed them with her own adoring smirk and a wave of her hand. They laughed to themselves, not being able to stop the tug they all felt on their heartstrings at the sight of the toothy grin they loved so much.

Y/N was a beacon of light to Easy company, the sun that continued to glow even after the clouds had threatened to cover her shine. She had singlehandedly kept morale from hitting rock bottom at so many points of this seemingly never ending war, always ensuring that the men had at least one thing to smile at, whether that be her own beaming face or the badly told jokes that they couldn’t stop themselves from chuckling at. Even with her being a platoon commander and lieutenant, she was a sister figure to many of the men, one that had gotten them through the toughest of times with both her brilliant leadership skills and cheerful, calm nature. To many of the younger boys, she was like a dotting mother, keeping them safe and happy in a world that wanted to see them suffer. When asked, any of the men would tell you she was a breath of fresh air in such a suffocating war, especially those such as Lewis Nixon and Dick Winters, who had founded close friendships with her since the very beginning all those years ago in Camp Toccoa.

The latter of the men stumbled into Y/N on his own walk over to see the former, chewing away at the piece of bread he held in his hand. He greeted her with a sheepish smile as he always did, and in return she flashed him a grin, linking her arms with his while he held his food out to her. She leaned over to take a rather large bite out of it, a giggle leaving her lips quiet at the look he gave her.

“That’s what you get for offering me your food, Dick. That’s on you.” She uttered to him matter-of-factly to which he shook his head with a smile, taking another bite as they stepped through the door of the house. The two looked around in search for the intelligence officer, Dick calling his name a few times in question. A yell in response sounded from one of the rooms closest to the red headed man, leading him to be the first to enter it.

“Dog, making combat jumps with the 17th while i’m in supply briefings all morning.” Y/N heard him tease as she quickly followed him into the room, standing beside the man. Her gaze stopped upon the officer they’d been looking for as he sat with his back towards them, untying his jump equipment from his legs.

“Yeah, lucky me.” He replied, the woman taking note of the fact his voice sounded solemn and his shoulders were slumped. She stepped forward closer to the man in front of her, her gentle smile not dropping from her lips even as her eyebrows knitted together slightly in concern.

“Hey Lew.” The woman called to him causing the man to barely glance over his shoulder with a forced smile and a mumble of her name and a greeting. Her smile dropped slightly at this, not use to the man being so dismissive of her.

"You know, congratulations. You’re probably the only man in the 101st with three combat stars over his jump wings.” The major spoke, clearly not picking up on the energy being passed around the room. Y/N reached behind her to give him a gentle smack to the chest to stop him from trying to make jests, her gaze never moving from the intelligence officer. Dick paused his chewing for a moment to cast a glance of confusion down at the woman, a look she caught as she looked back over her shoulder with widened eyes and a shake of her head.

“Not bad for someone who’s never fired his weapon in combat, huh?” The dark haired man asked, a hint of bitterness buried underneath each word. The two figures standing in the room looked away from each other to focus back on him as he spoke, Dick opening his mouth to respond.

“Really? Really, you’ve never-”

“-Nope.”

“Hmph. Not even with all the action we’ve seen?”

“Not a round.” The intelligence officer finished, his head moving to glance at the woman who stood closest to him out of the two friends. Their eyes met and the look she sent confirmed to him that she knew about his down demeanour. He glanced away from her, not wanting to have a non-verbal conversation with her as he stood and moved to the table in the corner of the room. Her eyes fell on the bottle of Vat 69 that lay before him, lips pursing in concern as he poured himself a glass and threw it back quickly.

“So, uh. How’d it go? This morning. The jump.” Dick asked, causing the woman to whip her head around to him, a look of disbelief crossing her face as she realised he really couldn’t figure out that Nix was hurting. The man slammed the bottle of alcohol down on the table as soon as the words finished leaving the major’s mouth, a look of indifference on his face as he turned to face the two of them. Lewis’ eyes met Y/N’s again, a flash of pain showing in his pupils before he turned his gaze over her shoulder to the man who sat leaning against the set of drawers by the door. He flattened his lips, nodding his head several times before opening his mouth.

“It was great. Fantastic.” He took several steps over to the couch by the window as Y/N moved to lean against the wooden frame of the bed, not but a metre behind him. “Took a direct hit over the drop-zone. I got out. Two others got out.”

“The rest of the boys?” Dick asked, the woman having to hold herself back from smacking herself in the face out of frustration of his stupid questions.

“Oh they blew up over Germany somewhere. Boom.” Lewis said, each word biting with malice. The two men continued to exchange words while the woman stood watching the intelligence officer, taking in the way his jaw clenched with anger and his eyes flickered with anxiety. Her heart ached for the man she had come to care for so deeply, wanting nothing more than to reach out to him and hold him in her arms. She saw the way his fingers gripped so tightly to the glass he held, her own hand moving absentmindedly to grab his free hand, giving it a squeeze gently. The man had been preparing to walk out of the room to look for another bottle of Vat 69 when she had done this, pausing his movement for a moment. He glanced at her and the hand now in his before looking back to Dick and continuing their dialogue though he made no move to pull away from her. If anything, he seemed to gravitate closer to her, taking in the calming effect she always seemed to have on him as a comfort he would do anything to keep.

The man tugged her with him as he went on a search more liquor, pulling her to an empty chair before giving her a nod to sit, letting go of her hand. Dick followed the two out of the room, his eyes taking note of the way they held onto each other and the silent conversations the two seemed to have. He walked into the room, scuffing his boots along the floor as he thought over his next words carefully. Lew’s chair scrapped along the ground as he pulled it closer to Y/N’s before he sat, throwing his feet up on her lap as he often did. One of her hands moved to grip at his shin, giving him assurance that she was there as she listened to the men continue their conversation. She sat tightlipped as Dick informed Lew of his demotion, her eyes downcast as she just tried to be a presence for the latter in a time where he needed it, as she always did.

The red headed major asked one final question and at the huff of a laugh that left Lew’s mouth, promptly left the room. He spared a glance at the woman in front of him, sending a small smile and a nod to her as he walked away, which she returned. The door clicked as it closed, leaving the room in an echo of silence. The two seated at the table made no move to talk, one staring at his glass and the other turning her gaze to look upon his face in concern. They sat like this for a few minutes as she racked her brain for something to say to the hurting man yet he bet her to it as he opened his mouth again.

“Quit staring at me like that, will you?” He spoke, his eyes not leaving his glass as he took another sip. She huffed a sigh before shoving his legs off her lap and standing, moving to place herself atop the table directly in front of him, her boots pushing themselves against the chair he sat on to steady her weight.

“Looking at you like what Lew?”

“Like I’m some wounded animal.”

“I wasn’t looking at you like you’re a wounded animal. I’m looking at you like you’re a wounded man.” She mumbled with a trying smile to which he chuckled at.

“Is that supposed to make it any better?” He responded, but a small smile pulled at the corner of his lips as he finally moved his gaze to look at her.

“Lew, talk to me honey.” The woman said, her head tilting to one side. He looked up at her under his brows, sighing quietly as he placed his drink down and pulled his chair closer. The man moved to lay his head on her lap, his arms folding over her thighs as one of her hands weaved its way into his hair. His hands gripped at the top of her thighs gently while her thumb came to brush against the side of his face, moving the hair that covered his eyes away from them. He sat there for a moment, relishing in the warmth she radiated, comfort settling in his aching body. She smiled down adoringly at the man as he let the tension go from his body and melted into her touch, showing his vulnerability to her and only her.

The two had always been like this with one another, affectionate and comfortable. In another life, they both could have seen it being more than just close friends, however, this world had not been kind to them, in more ways than just this. He had a wife back home waiting for him and she, well, she would one day find a nice man to treat her right, to love her as he did. It would never be enough though, she knew she would always look back on their time together and imagine him in the shoes of the man she’d eventually end up with. Meanwhile, he would do the same with the wife he thought he’d stick around for, constantly comparing her with the woman he loved who would be far, far away from him with someone who was not him. This world had not been kind to them, so why would it change its mind now.

Lew sighed again, pushing his head to nuzzle into her stomach gently as his arms moved around her hips, twisting his fingers into the belt loops on the back of her pants, squeezing her tightly. Y/N continued to run her fingers through his hair softly, her nails scratching at his scalp lightly. She tilted her head to the side so she could see his face and when he noticed this he moved his so he could see her better, looking up at her with tired eyes.

“You don’t have to pretend you’re fine with me Lew, you know that.” She whispered to him calmly and as the words left her mouth, his eyes begun to well up with tears. He let out a quiet cry, it sounded dry and pained, and caused Y/N’s chest to clench with empathy. She angled her body slightly to the side so his face was tucked into her torso, hidden from the world as he gripped her hips for dear life while he continued to cry. “I wish I had the means to make it all better, to make this all disappear, but just know that we’re gonna get through this okay? You and me are gonna get through this together.” Her thumb moved to run across the space under the eye that was visible to her, brushing the tears away from his face as they fell. She continued to do this for several minutes as he cried quietly until it finally came to a point where he seemed to quieten down, laboured breaths being the only thing heard from his mouth. “Deep breaths for me Lew. There you go.”

The man let out a few more shaky breaths before inhaling deeply, collecting himself as well as he could. He lifted his eyes to look up at her again, taking in the calm look on her face and the tenderness in her eyes. She smiled down at him again, this time on show for him to see, which he returned on the form of a small twitch of the lip. He mumbled a thank you to her, and even from hearing just those two words, she understood everything he left unsaid to her. Thank you for supporting me, for holding me, for always being there for me, and thank you for loving me. Her smile widened, their eye contact never faltering even when he sat up, resting his chin his hands that now lay over her knees. Her hand reached out to brush the skin of his face once more, wiping away the last streak of tears on his cheeks.

“We all need a little help sometimes. We’re only human.” Y/N uttered to him, her light truly shining through, creating a halo of shine around her head as if she was his very own angel. Lewis stared at her silently for a moment, her eyes gazing back at him as they felt comfortable in each other’s space.

“You’re too good to me.” He mumbled, breaking the quiet so suddenly. Her eyebrows pulled together as a chuckle left her lips.

“Maybe I am, maybe I’m not. And maybe, you just deserve more than you think” She replied while jumping off the table carefully, giving him a gentle tap on the nose. “Now I have a platoon I need to sort out before I lose them all to the local ladies. Are you going to be okay for a while?” He nodded his head at her question, flashing her a small smile.

“I think i’ll manage.” Lewis responded, moving to take a sip from his glass, an action which she squinted at in doubt but let it go for the sake of the man who had gone through a lot for one morning already. She leant down to him, a hand placed on either cheek before placing a tender kiss to his forehead.

“I’ll be back before you know it.”

***

It had been a hard day, that was certain. With the discover of what seemed to be a prisoner camp of some sort, the whole battalion had been sent into disarray. Even with the ever present presence of Lewis by her side, something had curled deep in her stomach with uneasy. He himself held a look of discontent on his face, however, that had been a constant resting state for the man in recent days. After their small moment that day of his bad jump experience, Lewis had to learn the next day that his wife was leaving him and taking everything in the divorce. The man had been livid, especially with the news of her taking the dog. He had barely left Y/N’s side after that, clinging to her calm presence even more so than he usually did. Not that she minded, and in all honesty, she was almost thrilled with having him around so often at her side.

On arrival to the camp, Y/N noted the stench that wafted in the air, moving to cover her nose, as had many of the other boys. She glanced to Lew who, of course, sat beside her on the jeep, confusion and a hint of fear set in her eyes as they both rose from their seats and took several tentative steps forward. The gates were opened, Y/N and Lewis stepping into the camp standing close to each other, subconsciously trying to protect one another in the case of any unknown offence.

It didn’t take long for them to get a general understanding of this place, horror, sadness and grief latching on to every soldier that stepped foot on the grounds of the camp. Y/N felt it tighten in her chest as she refrained from breaking down on her knees in front of all of these people. They needed them, they needed her, so she slapped on a gentle smile and composed herself once more, stepping forward to help anyone who reached for her. The day went on like this, covering up her own emotions for the sake of those who were left so broken and so emotional themselves, and so she held them, smiled at them, did anything she could to ensure these people knew they were now safe.

It hadn’t got better for her after that with the news that she would be the only one needed to go to the woman’s camp from her company as they felt the need to have someone who they can feel more trusting of. Lew had secured her in his arms with a warm embrace before she left, pressing a gentle kiss to the side of her head. She had sent him off with a smile, forcing it over her slowly breaking exterior, refusing to show her already broken interior.

Nothing could have prepared her for what she saw after that, and if the men’s camp was hard enough to take in, then the women’s camp was a whole other level of awful. She had taken her helmet off and let her hair down at the request of one of the other officers who thought it be best to make it obvious she was a woman, her hair rustling gently with the wind as she entered the gates. Women had slowly begun to peak their heads out of the small huts, unsure of this new group of people before flocking towards her quickly at the sight of a fellow female, clearly with the Americans, the flag strapped tightly to her arm. They yelled this and that at her while sobbing hysterically, falling to their knees in front of the officer. Her eyes were struggling to focus on anything in particular as she looked from woman to girl to child. She picked up on so many things while looking at each one but had to try her best to block it out so she could focus on helping them there and now. It was hard to stop the flashing of death from her mind, especially those of the children, the babies, as she wandered through the camp, talking to as many women as she could.

When she arrived back to the officers housing, her feet moved on autopilot while her face held little emotion. The sound of the door opening made the one man still sat in the room look up. Ron stood to his feet, drink in his hand as he walked towards her, concern covering his face as he took in the dull look covering his friend’s features. He handed her the glass he held as an offering of comfort which she just took absentmindedly in her hand.

“Hitler’s dead. Killed himself in Berlin.” He mumbled to her almost happily, but no response of joy was seen from her as she wandered over to the square table that sat in the dining room, standing behind one of the chairs as she thought. There was that thing again; death. She had seen death before, she had even caused death before, hell, she’d almost seen her own death. But none of it, none, could have prepared her for what she saw today. And now with the news of Hitler taking his own life, the woman felt a single emotion bubble to the surface that did not often rise within her. Rage.

Pure, untainted anger coursed through her vein causing her hand to clench around the thin glass that she’d been handed. She looked up from the table she had been staring at, aware of the voice that had been talking to her which she continued to ignore. Her eyes landed on a grand mirror that sat opposite her on the wall, her gaze meeting that of deep orbs of fury. She walked slowly to the mirror, standing face to face with a woman she didn’t recognise, a dark storm running rampant through her eyes as she stared back.

Ron jumped as the sound of glass breaking could be heard echoing through the room, then again and again. Y/N’s fists had come in contact with the reflective surface, smashing away the smirking figure of an angry monster that had looked at her. He stood in shock as he watched her destroy the mirror before moving on to picking up one of the dining room chairs and throwing it into the wall, breaking it in the process. Then the next chair went, straight into a cabinet full of expensive looking plates and china, the shattering noises ringing through the room. She felt as if she was watching through someone else’s eyes as she destroyed anything she could get her hands on, blood dripping from the large scraps and cuts on her knuckles, glass imbedded deeply in some. Ron suddenly stepped forward as she lifted another piece of furniture, his hands wrestling it from her grip, throwing it behind him before grabbing her by the face so she would look at him. He didn’t even get the chance to say anything before she collapsed to the ground in tears, loud, pained sobs leaving her lips as the sound of fast footsteps could be heard coming down the stairs. Two men arrived at the same time in the doorway, catching sight of the mess of a room before seeing the two people sat on the floor, one of which was almost completely enveloped in the others arms.

“What the fuck.” Lip had muttered under his breath as Dick stepped into the room. Ron looked up at him as he approached, an expression of caution on his face. The red headed man took sight of the blood dripping down her hands, his mind flashing memories in violent colour for a moment before he shook it away, his eyebrows set in worry about the state of one of his closest friends.

“Lip, go grab Doc Roe. And Nix, get me Nix.” He called to the man behind him, who nodded and immediately ran off. “Let’s get her up.” The man said to Ron who nodded in agreement. Dick bent down to pull her up off the ground, calling her name gently a couple of times only for her to latch onto the man, arms around him while her face hid in the crook of his neck. He felt the wet feeling of tears crawling down the skin of his shoulder as she continued to sob, catching a glimpse of Ron watching behind her, a look of concern on his face as he too stood.

Gene rushed in with Lip close behind, who muttered that the intelligence officer was on his way, just as Dick had set her down on a couch in the living room, away from the mess she had created. Her sobbing had yet to die down to hiccups as her swollen eyes gazed upon the hands that continued to hold her by the waist. Dick had sat close to her, ensuring the woman who had become like a sister to him was feeling supported enough until Nixon showed up. She was thankful for the red headed man as his body heat reminded her that she wasn’t alone as she attempted to cry her broken heart back together. Gene begun pulling the pieces of glass from her hands, causing her to flinch every few seconds, her eyes now firmly set on the crimson that dripped down her fingers.

The harsh choke of a trapped cry sounded from her throat as she tunnel-visioned into the red shade, flashes coming hard and fast in her head. It was the faces and names that she had stopped herself from remembering to hold herself together for just that little bit longer, long enough that she could make those around her just that little bit happier. She had been digging her own dark pit of grief this entire time, a smile splashed across her face while she did, yet she had been surprised when she eventually tumbled into it, dirt now marring her beautiful features into something melancholic.

Lew stumbled through the door in a panic at that moment, almost tripping over the door frame as he ran into the room. His eyes caught sight of the mess of a room before anything else, but the sight of blood on the floor and the sound of her cries made him move again. He all but threw himself into the room he heard her in, taking in Gene kneeling in front of the woman on the floor, finishing the last stitch of her left hand knuckles, and Dick who sat beside her on the couch, holding her gently by the waist as she cried into his shoulder. He wasn’t even sure what had gone on in the short time since he’d last seen her but if this scene and the room over was anything to go by, it had not been good. He had no idea what he was going to show up to after he was found by Lipton and shouted a ‘come quick, Y/N needs you’ from the man, he’d quickly left the work he’d been trying to do to find out, however, this is not what he had expected at all.

The man made it to her side in a second, sitting down on her other side before tugging her from Dick’s arms without a word. She inhaled his scent as soon as he pulled her into his chest, feeling just the slightest bit more comfortable knowing he was there with her now. She cried and cried for what seemed like hours and as she finally fell into a round of gentler sniffly sobs, she noted that Gene, Lip and Ron had all left to the other room to give her some more privacy. Her two favourite boys were still sat by her side, exchanging a silent conversation over her head as she leaned closer into Lew’s side, her head nuzzling into his chest. She heard the man shush her gently, a hand running through her hair and settling on her back.

“Breathe with me Y/N. In and out.” He mumbled into her ear while his head nodded to the red headed man as they concluded their nonverbal talk. “I’m gonna take you to your room, is that okay?” She sniffed loudly before nodding slowly, her gaze moving to his face as she looked up at him. His heart almost broke at the sight of the pain in her teary eyes, red rimmed from being rubbed raw as she cried. Dick helped Lew get her to her feet before letting the latter take over completely, their feet leading them towards the door that led to the stairs. The man watched as the two disappeared, worried for his friend but happy that they had each other to get one another through the rough times. He shook his head with a small smile as he heard them ascend the stairs, ideas of the two never leaving each others side from here on out.

The two in question made it upstairs and into her bedroom, the door now closed firmly behind them as they both sagged onto the bed. The woman sat completely quiet for a moment as Lewis looked her over until her eyes met his and the waterworks started again. Her head instinctively fell to his lap as he sat on the edge of her bed, one of his hands instantly moving to her hair, playing with the ends of it gently as he rocked her slowly.

“You wanna talk about it honey?” He muttered quietly to her to which she immediately shook her head no to. He nodded even though she couldn’t see him. “Okay, that’s alright. Let it all out like this instead, that’s okay too.”

The man continued to just sit and hold her as she cried for almost an hour, her emotions seemingly never ending as she let out everything she’d been holding in for months. He had moved her to rest in his lap, her face hidden away on his shoulder, the tears leaking down onto his skin. No words left his mouth, only the quiet shushing and cooing he had been doing to calm her down, something that was finally starting to work as her sobs turned to sniffles again.

She inhaled through her nose, having to do so loudly as her nose blocked up from the snot that had started to gather. Even then, Lew watched on with the smallest of smiles while she wiped over her face with the sleeve of her shirt, wiping away the liquid that had dribbled down her skin. Her lips parted with shaky breaths leaving her mouth but overall she’d calmed to a quiet wail.

“Just breath Y/N. Nothing else you gotta worry about right now but breathing.” Lewis’ voice sounded in her ear causing her to raise her head from his shoulder to face him. He imitated deep breathing to encourage her to do the same which she followed through with, moving in sync with the man. After one last deep breath, the woman mumbled a quiet thank you, which he smiled at with a toothy grin.

“Nothing to thank me for honey. We all need a little help sometimes. We’re only human.” He recited the words she’d spoken to him several days prior causing a small smile to pull to her lips. “There you go, there’s that smile I love so much.”

Y/N stared at the man with puffy, red eyes and a slightly sniffle but he had never seen her more beautiful than he did then; raw, vulnerable and soul bearing. Their faces were close now, something they both only begin to notice when she shifted on his lap, accidentally nudging her nose into his. Neither pulled away though as they continued to stare at each other.

“Lew?” The woman called, her voice hoarse and choppy.

“Yeah?”

“I want you to kiss me. No, I need you to kiss me. Take it all away, please.” She mumbled to him and a moment later he leant forward to place his lips gently against hers. She melted instantly, letting his warmth wrap around her, holding her together in a way she knew no one else could in that second. His hands moved to her waist as she grasped at his cheeks carefully. Y/N wasn’t okay, no, but for this period of time, she felt whole for once, even if that whole was partially weakened. He was something she could never have until now, and after everything she had seen and everything she had done, she wasn’t holding back anymore. She needed him and he needed her, just like they needed oxygen or water. And just as he had a few days prior with her, she needed him now more than ever, his hands were the only thing that could hold her together, his voice the only thing that could talk her out of her dark hole of silence, his eyes the only thing she could gaze at and feel okay, even if only for a moment.

The two pulled away from each others reluctantly, their lips still brushing as they sat in silence. He smiled at her then, a smile that reached his eyes for the first time in a while, a grin that caused her to do the same, though it was small. She gazed at his face, eyes trailing over his cheeks, lips, and back to his own eyes.

“Please don’t ever let me go.” She whispered, her eyes welling up with tears again. He shook his head slightly, eyes never leaving hers as he moved his hands to her cheek, using his thumb to brush away a stray tear that fell against her skin.

“I would never dream of it.” He replied causing her to huff a pained laugh. He gave her cheek a gentle squeeze, pulling her gaze away from her hands. “I mean it, we’re in this together. We’re gonna make it through this together. Just like you said.” She nodded at his words before opening her own mouth.

“Just like I said.”

#this is not quite what i wanted it to be #but it's not bad so that's fine with me #welcome nixon to the club guys #finally did a fic for my mans #lewis nixon #lewis nixon x reader #nixon #band of brothers #band of brothers x reader #band of brothers fanfic #band of brothers fluff #soft!nixon

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iwadori · 3 years

Note

Atsumu dating Kita's younger sister (their manager). That's it. That's the request. Hope you like this prompt 🤞😅

Dating your brothers teammate (Atsumu)

Part One Part Two Part Three

Word count: 1.6K

Genre: angst, fluff

ATSUMU

You and Atsumu started dating a month after Kita introduced you in your first year

You’re now in your second year and still going strong

However, no ones knows about your relationship since Atsumu said you being the manager and him being the setter it will affect the team dynamic?

You start the day off, seeing a message from your boyfriend,

‘Tsumu: Mornning babe, can’t wait to see you today!

You don’t respond, you are Atsumu have been at odds for the past few weeks as you feel like you guys should make your relationship public. Not even public per se, but you definitely feel it shouldn’t be hidden away especially with it being nearly two years of you being together.

Of course, Atsumu disagreed. He felt like at this moment you and him revealing your relationship to the team will just mess up the ‘dynamics’ or whatever that’s supposed to mean.

You get ready for school eating the breakfast your grandma made you and conversing with her and Kita before you both headed off to school together meeting Aran on the way.

You had an early morning practice and you didn’t mind it. To be honest, you love being around the team you were all a little family, you having a good relationship with all the guys.

This morning, the guys were all practicing different sorts of skills Kita was helping some of the gives with dives and receives and the rest doing other things. You were helping Osamu, Suna and Atsumu with there serves.

Regardless of your public or private relationship status with Atsumu, you the twins and Suna were all good friends. You did have a slight inclination that Osamu and Suna knew of the relationship with you and Suna but just didn’t bring it up.

At the end of practice, the usual fan club was there waiting for the twins and the other guys to flirt and talk with them. As you are their manager, you did get some slight hate and jealousy from the other girls in your year but you didn’t pay no mind to it.

When leaving practice, Atsumu (who usually walks with you to your class) gets stopped by a girl who seems to have something important to say so you politely step to the side (still in ear shot though.)

“Miya-san” she said a bit nervous as her finger were shaking “I have this letter I would like for you to read.”

He took the letter and said “Thank you, and you can just call me Atsumu” he smile at her.

“Thank you Atsumu, I hope to hear a response to you soon” she says about to walk away “Also, just to clarify you are single right?”

“Yes yes of course” he assures quickly making you annoyed “Why did you ask?”

“I assumed you were dating your manager, you seem pretty close”

“Oh her” he laughs and you already start to walk to your lesson leaving him behind “we’re just friends”

This makes the girl smile as she leaves, Atsumu turns to where you were standing shocked that you were completely vanished. He did think back to the conversation you had a week ago about your relationship status which did make him kind of sad for you since he did understand your reasoning he just wanted to you atleast wait it out till nationals is done.

He finds you at lunch, and to him it seems you don’t have a problem with him at all as you were being your usual smiley self interacting with him and all of your friends. So he assumed everything was fine (which it wasn’t of course.)

The next day at practice, when it ended the same girl came back again this time with friends and instead of approaching Atsumu they decided to approach you.

“Hi you’re the manager right?” one of them asks.

“Yup I have been for the past couple years.” you say

“Oh and you’re definitely not dating any of the guys on the team right?”

“I don’t see why it’s any of your business, but no i’m not.” it pained you to say this but you did agree with Atsumu to say you weren’t dating to people and as much as it pained you to say this you couldn’t break your ‘agreement.’

Once the girls leave, you start to softly cry because you don’t want to have to hide your relationship anymore. Atsumu enters the corridor and sees you upset and rushes towards you, “Hey babe what’s wrong with you?” he asks

“Nothing ‘tsumu just go back to practice” you murmur

“No i’m not going until you tell me whats wrong?”

“it’s just that girl that confessed to you yesterday and her friends approached me about if I was dating anyone and i-”

“what did you say, he told them no right?” he interrupts

“Is that all you care about? Wether I keep our relationship secret or not ..” you say slightly raising your voice

“Well I would appreciate if you don’t go round telling the world that you’re dating me gosh Y/N” he shouts a bit

“I’m not even fucking doing that, I havent told a soul and that’s all because of YOU”

You’re screaming match has alerted the team (who you didn’t notice) and they all stood around you watching before Kita steps in “Y/N are you okay??”

“yeah i’m fine bro” you say preparing to leave with tears still in your eyes “I just got into an argument with a friend”

Before you leave the corridor you look back at Atsumu and catch all the guys attention when you say “Also Atsumu, happy anniversay ‘babe’”

“I KNEW IT!” shouts Osamu but Suna nudges him telling him to ‘read the room.’ Kita slowly approaches Atsumu and punches him in the face “I don’t care what you did but you made my sister cry so you better go fix it you dick”

Atsumu nodded and clutched his face, “Also I think it was pretty evident that you guys were dating.”

“Wait they were dating?” said Aran

You were in your room, scrolling through old pictures of you and Atsumu and looking at the presents he was going to give him for your anniversary still crying. You hear a knock on your door “Granny, I’m not hungry right now” you shout. But the door opens anyways “Granny I said I wasn-” you pause when you see a bruised Atsumu ‘Kita’ you think making yourself smile at the thought of your brother coming to your defence.

“Y/N, i’m sorry baby for trying to hide our relationship and not seeing how wrong it was until it was knocked into me... literally” he says cautiously sitting on your bed “ I’ve always wanted to be able to show off to the world but I just couldn’t cause I thought Kita would be mad and I genuinely thought it would mess up the team dynamic, however I’d rather have Kita be mad at me and the team loosing nationals if it meant getting to date you”

His words make you swoon and to add on to your fawning he whips out a wrapped up box giving it to you. When you open it, you see it’s a necklace with both your initials on it “ Happy anniversay babe, this has been one of the best years of my life.”

You silently hand him your presents, murmuring a quiet “Happy anniversary.” After seeing your presents, he gives you a big deep hug whispering mutiple thank yous and compliments into your neck making you smile.

“So does this mean we’re in a public relationship? right?” you ask making sure you were on the same page.

“Of course!” he exclaims “Also check your phone”

You look down at your phone seeing a bunch of notifications all tagging you in one post that was from Atsumu on instagram. It was 8 pictures of him and you and a caption that read *insert long romantic sappy paragraph that I’m too lazy too write since its 3 am :3*

Your heart was overwhelmed with love for Atsumu, you spent the rest of your night cuddling and watching movies and before you went to sleep you told him you loved him.

Waking up the next morning, you thought it was all a dream to be honest. Because there was no way that Atsumu did all that right? You go downstairs and are shocked at the sight you see, Atsumu and Kita both sitting down eating breakfast together “What are you doing with my boyfr-” you stop yourself from finishing that sentence,

“Its okay Y/N you can say boyfriend, I have given your boyfriend the talk I just had to make sure that he knows that if he was ever to lay a finger on you that he would definitely get a bi-”

“Ughh nii-chan you’re being so embarrasing” you say pulling Atsumu back upstairs hearing Kita’s laughter in the backround.

You and Atsumu, stay together and it wasn’t much of a suprise when your relationship was public to the rest of the school and that girl that wanted Atsumu she ended up with Osamu anyways (it does makes sense since they do have the same face afterall.) Kita enjoys his days embarassing the both of you whenever you’re at your house. But you don’t care since you can finally show off to the world how great your boyfriend is.

Authors Notes: I don’t know if you wanted it to have angst in it but I hope you enjoy? Might make this a series so if you want anymore characters Request them and I’ll write for them too

#haikyu #haikyu angst #haikyu fluff #haikyuu x reader comfort #haikyu headcanons #haikyuu-fluff #haikyu x reader #haikyu scenarios #haikyuu scenarios #haikyuu x reader #atsumu scenarios #atsumu x you #atsumu angst #atsumu x reader #atsumu fluff #atsumu headcanons #signedwithane😌

629 notes · View notes

dancingaliensfics · 3 years

Text

♡My Prison Pen Pal♡

Helmut Zemo x reader

Word count: 1,802

Warnings: swearing, mentions of prison and crimes and slight angst to do with his family

A/N: its finally here! I havent writen a fic in a long time so hopefully you guys like this! I tried to avoid using idioms and things like that but message me if you need anything explained or reworded as I know most people aren't native English speakers

@sorcerersofnyc

♡♡♡

His first letter came during the series finale of your favourite show. A rather inconvenient moment, you thought, so it stayed on the welcome mat until you passed through the hall on your way to bed. Picking it up, you figured you'd skim the first few lines then finish it and write a reply before work. Instead, you found yourself writing and rewriting a reply through the night. Somehow this man had managed to enthrall you with only a letter. Maybe it was the way he wrote as if he was some elegant poet whose sonnets would one day be hailed as classics. How he managed to be open and expressive, exuding a welcoming aura, and yet still seeming mysterious. Or perhaps it was simply fated by the stars that Helmut Zemo would capture your heart.

You waited anxiously for his second letter to arrive. After sending the first, you hadn't cared whether you got a response, the whole thing seemed like a bad idea to you. But your mother was insistent that you needed to meet new people and this way you wouldn't need to worry about awkward face to face conversations. Sending the first letter felt like any other chore you do in the day, done with much effort and resignment but forgotten within minutes. But the second? It felt like the most important thing you'd done in a long time. You'd even bought a first class stamp (not that it makes a difference).

You wanted to know more about this intriguing man. No, supervillain. Charged with international terrorism. Jesus christ what the fuck was wrong with you? Were you really falling in love with a supervillain after one letter? But he didn't seem evil to you. He wrote eloquently, somehow his simple and brief description of his day (he'd started reading a new psychology book, you'd have to send him some recommendations) sounded fascinating in his words.

Over time, you started to notice small things about Helmut. The way he crossed his t's, how he signed his name, but mainly that there was a romanticism to his writing. From the way he described his home, his wife, his son to his recipes for Sokovian dishes with small notes and doodles (your favourite was his shepherd's pie recipe where he helpfully noted his mother's assertion that you should always add more than you think you need). It was becoming clear to you that he wasn't the stoic and vengeful baron you expected but rather a soft, lonely and endearingly weird man who you couldn't imagine plotting to destroy the Avengers. Whilst it was his mystery that first captivated you, it was his sweet and sometimes awkward personality that convinced you to keep writing.

It took a while for Helmut to tell you about his family. You had heard on the news back when he first arrested about his motive, so you were interested to hear his perspective on his crimes. But that wasn't what you got. Instead, he told you about when he and his father used to play football when he was young and how they would play a match every time he visited, with Helmut playing against his father and son, who always wanted to play with grandfather. He told you of the songs his wife used to sing, how her voice was always loud and shaky and after years of singing somewhere over the rainbow she would still forget the lyrics and invent her own. He told you how his son was the best pianist he had ever heard. How he could play the greatest rendition of amazing grace and that he had just learnt the theme from swan lake. That he had been excited to practice it on his grandfathers grand piano the day Ultron attacked.

There was something so human about this man. His love for his family, his loss and grief, his plan to avenge his family, it was all so tragic and yet here he was sending you drawings of the flowers from his garden growing up. You wanted to hug him and yet sometimes you felt he wouldn't need it, wouldn't want it. You were wrong.

Helmut Zemo missed his family. He told you so in one of his most recent letters. He missed holding his son, brushing his wife's hair, going for long drives, waking up at 2am to comfort his son, early morning trips to the shops, cleaning up after dinner, helping with homework. Everything he listed seemed so trivial, so meaningless in the grand scheme of life and yet the memories meant so much to him.

You realised then you had never pitied him before. Not that he wasn't deserving of it, just that he didn't seem to need it. But overtime you realised that what Helmut had really needed wasn't revenge or to make a world free from superhumans, it was someone to talk to. Someone to trust. Someone who would understand his pain and not judge it. Perhaps, you thought to yourself, you could be that person.

Fuck.

You couldn't think of how to cope with this. No one you knew had ever mentioned falling in love with a criminal through letters. And as hard as you tried you hadn't been able to find a single romcom with this plot line. You couldn't tell him. You imagined with his seemingly fragile state of mind receiving from basically a stranger professing their love would at best cause him to ghost you. Especially after he confided in you, shared his thoughts and memories.

So instead you continued as normal. You sent him pressed flowers and pictures of your favourite places. Eventually, he asked what looked like, and you spent an hour trying to decide whether you should send a picture of yourself or to just vaguely describe your features. After deciding to send a picture of yourself on holiday a few months before the blip, you found yourself wondering what he'd do with it. Would he throw it away as soon as he got the letter or would he keep it, tuck it away in some book to look at whilst thinking of you?

You also found yourself wondering what he looked like in the real world. You had found pictures of him online, but they didn't feel real. He was never rarely happy. The pictures pre Ultron were clearly taken by paparazzi, so you weren't surprised he rarely looked anything other than annoyed. There were a few though, ones with his wife and son, where he clearly hadn't noticed, and some from when he was much younger and seemed to enjoy the attention. Then were those taken after his arrest.

And so you continued to wonder he looked like. How he looked in the morning, with flowers in his hair or in summer with the sun lighting his face. You wondered what his hair looked like wet, if he ever scrunched his nose in disgust. You wondered what his smile was like.

Over time, you told him more about yourself. The stress of returning home after the blip to no job, no house and your friends 5 years older. Your ex was married with kids and your sister had moved abroad. It was as if you blinked and your whole life had changed. You mentioned how it was your mum who had suggested getting a pen pal, so you could talk to someone new, who was living a different life to you, although she had meant someone in a different country not jail. Since coming back you'd been isolated and stressed with starting a new job, recovering lost information and personal belongings and moving house, so you had thought it might be good to speak to someone who didn't know you, who couldn't judge you. You told Helmut how it had been good, how writing to him had helped you, how he had helped you more than he could ever know.

No, that sounded creepy. How you appreciated his letters.

Too formal. How you hadn't expected to become his friend, but you were glad to be able to say you were.

Helmut was comforting. You knew in your head that your meeting on Friday was nothing to worry about but seeing him say it felt so reassuring. Each one of his letters made you feel relaxed, feel safe. You wanted to make him feel the same. So, as a way to repay his kindness you had told him that no matter what happened, he could always trust you. And it was true. You couldn't imagine a world where you wouldn't do anything for Helmut and although you knew he would never need it, you still wanted him to know you would always care about him, even if no one else did.

Writing to him had become as easy as talking to someone you'd known all your life. You had fallen into an easy routine, you knew when to expect his letters and you knew when you'd send a reply. The routine felt so natural that you even knew what the envelope would look like, always the same off-white with a square edged flap. The address was always the same too. Except on his last letter. Which was strange.

At first, you thought Helmut had been moved to a different prison but after frantically typing the address into Google Maps you realised it was not a prison. Fuck you had no idea what it was, but it wasn't a prison. It also wasn't in Germany.

You sat still, staring at the unopened letter for a few minutes.

You looked up at the door. You thought you heard someone knock. The post had already come and you weren't expecting people. Hell, there wasn't anyone other than your parents who would visit anyway and they would have called first. Now you were sat still, staring at the front door.

"I know you're in there, the lights are on."

It was as if you were a marionette, being moved by some strange force that was slowly pulling you out of your seat and towards the door. You didn't even register that you moved until you felt the door handle on your fingertips. The cold metal caused you to stop, as if broken out of a trance. There was a sudden realisation that if you opened the door your life would never be the same. It was sickening, a mixture of dread and excitement; it reminded you of the moment before a roller coaster drops. You repeated that thought in your head. "Your life would never be the same". Your life hadn't been the same in almost a year. What would be the harm in one more big change. So you did it. You opened the door.

His smile was beautiful.

#zemo x reader #helmut x reader #helmut zemo x reader #baron zemo x reader #zemo #baron zemo #helmut zemo #tfatws

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mitts2002 · 3 years

Text

Aight’ Bet

Hi this is my first time posting on here so I hope whoever is reading this enjoys!! This is a noritoshi kamo x reader where the nori and (Y/N) need a little push from their wonderful Gojo sensei to finally confess~

"Dont you think (Y/N) and noritoshi would make the cutest couple!?" Gojo screamed over the phone to Utahime who sighed in response.

"I can't help but disagree Gojo, Noritoshi doesn't seem ready for a relationship plus is the only reason you rang me really to discuss our students non existent love lives?" Utahime retorted knowing that the couple would in fact be adorable yet refusing to accept that Gojo could actually be right about something.

"No Utahime! I bet if them two were able to spend a few hours together the tension would build up so high that one of them would burst and BAM a couple would be born" the blue eyed male replied, the volume of his voice increasing with each word trying to convince her that they were the highschool sweethearts the jujustu world needed.

“How could you even say that!? I get that its cute whenever they glance at each other and shy away with cute little blushing cheeks but i bet it would take more than a few hours for a whole relationship to-” “OH you bet“ Gojo interrupted an obvious smirk on his face knowing Utahime wouldn’t back down from his advances.

“you know what i meant idiot i wasn’t actually trying to make a bet with you especially after what happened last time” the black haired woman scoffed after hearing a chuckle through the phone.

“Aight’ bet! tomorrow ill bring my second years to kyoto for some training and then lets see if something happens between our precious students“ Gojo proposed excitedly as if he were a child in a sweet shop.

“you know what fine! and im only agreeing cause i know nothings gonna happen tomorrow between them i mean noritoshi is too stiff and (Y/N) always backs out last minute” utahime exclaimed not wanting to prove Gojo right. “GREAT! if i win then you will have to be my slave for 2 whole days and if you win ill be your-” “wait i never agreed to that!” “see ya tomorrow then!” Gojo had quickly rushed his farewells before hanging up relieved he avoided Utahime’s lecture.

"Alright class!" Gojo sensei yelled excitingly as he burst through the doors. This overgrown man child always had something new, it could never be a regular class where his students actually learn then were let out for a break. No Gojo Satorou had to be the most extra male on this earth and for the first time ever it worked in his second year student (Y/N)'s favour.

"What it is now?" Maki groaned with an annoyed expression on her face. No one could blame her though after all the blindfolded man put his beloved students through. "Don't be so sour maki! Be like me a sweet little mochi~ Oh and before I forget I wanted to let you all know that we will meeting with our lovely sister school for some training. Isnt that great!?" Gojo sensei had announced clapping his hands and smiling brightly.

'I wonder if training is all this is' (Y/N) thought to herself realising how sus this situation was before speaking out "wait Gojo sensei weren't we meant to learn a super secret technique today? You said that you were gonna show it us yesterday and that nothing could stop you" (Y/N) questioned as Inumaki gave a little "shake" for support.

"Well my dear (Y/N) something VERY important has come up and we must go to kyoto immediately. You have no right to deny and we will be leaving in 30 minutes so go grab whatever you kids need" Gojo sensei had practically sung before skipping out the door. What an odd man everyone collectively thought before getting up to grab whatever they needed.

30 minutes has passed and in that time panda had gathered his and maki's weapons while you and toge stocked up on cough medicine and basic medical equipment. The journey was short since Gojo had practically teleported you all there and all that was left was to approach the students.

A few figures from the distance were slowly coming into view and (Y/N) could vaguely make out that only utahime, miwa, mai, momo and noritoshi had attended this last minute joint training.

Despite the others reaching and gathering around your small group of second years giving their greetings the only thing your eyes could focus on was noritoshi’s thick black hair as it gently swayed in the breeze. Honestly it was as if the man was in a L'Oréal advert or something.

"(Y/N) stop staring we all know you both have this weird thing going on but we're here to train not flirt dumbass" Maki had whispered into your ear but little did she know that you were in fact here to flirt and not train due to a certain bet between two teachers.

“alright kids listen up! me and the wonderful Utahime sensei have set up this last minute training as its always good to train with new people and techniques. Everyone will be working in pairs“ Gojo announced before Utahime continued.

“The teams we decided on today will be Maki and Miwa, Momo and Imumaki, Panda and Mai then (Y/N) and Noritoshi. Eveyones free to do whatever they want in their sparring matches just don’t severely injure each other, me and Gojo will be watching over the matches and determine the winners“ Utahime informed all the students before they scurried off to in different spaced out areas.

"So Noritoshi how are you? Its been a while since we've last seen eachother" (Y/N) said trying not to let her nervousness show.

"I'm alright just studying and training to be honest. Although I recently started to practice cursive and can even write my own name now" he responded with pride and a small nice.

You laughed causing Noritoshi to cock his head to the side in confusion. "Is there something wrong with cursive?" His deep voice asked with clear offense.

"No no it's just that's so freaking cute and you look so happy about it too" (Y/N) teased with more laughter and ruffled his hair

"Oi don't touch my hair do you know how long it takes to do these wrap bang things?"

"Well how would I know I've never done them nori"

"Well one day I could teach you if you'd like" Noritoshi offered looking to the side trying to hide his red cheeks.

"Aww I'd love that I'm awful at doing hair to be honest so learning some new styles would be great but first we gotta get this dumb sparring match over and done with" (Y/N) moaned as she got into position.

_______________________________

An hour had flew by and the students were taking a break from their matches happily chatting away while the teachers spoke in private about their progress. “come on look at the way they look at eachother OH (Y/N) touched his shoulder SHES FLIRTIN-” “GOJO SHUT THE FUCK UP YOUR SO DAMN LOUD” “sorry but loooook they in love” Gojo cried out with fake tears in his cerulean eyes

“Alright lets just observe look theyre going to the vending machine to get some drinks like FRIENDS DO“ Utahime emphasised on the friends worried she might lose and become this awful mans slave for 2 days.

_______________________________

“Nori im gonna go get a drink from the vending machine do you want one?” “Actually ill just come with you if you dont mind” “OH sure thats fine does anyone else want anything!?” (Y/N) yelled to the whole group receiving a choir of get me this please or get me that and the single tuna mayo.

The walk to the vending machine was quiet but a comfortable silence had fallen upon the pair. It was always like this when you were around Noritoshi Kamo. Peaceful. She didnt feel the need to go the extra mile to entertain him or ensure he wasn’t bored in your presence as your playful banter and sarcastic remarks towards one another was enough for the both of you.

“(Y/N) is it me or have Gojo and Utahime sensei been staring at us more than the others?“ Noritoshi questioned unable to shake off the feeling of being watched. “Um i’m not too sure i havent been really paying attention to anything other than yo-“ Embarrasment washed over (Y/N) as the words flew out of her mouth before she could stop herself.

“Is that so?“ Nori smirked slightly as you swore you could drop dead right here in this moment. “No i just meant that” “Meant what?“ Noritoshi interrupted leaning closer as you fumbled through your words

“OH LOOK the vending machine is right there better get those drinks“ You quickly said and scrambled away before Noritoshi could get any closer.

“SEE Nori was too intimidating and (Y/N) ran off despite clearly wanting him! its never gonna happen today“ Utahime whispered to Gojo benhind the bushes as he shook his head. “Trust me i have faith in my wonderful (Y/N) I AINT RAISED NO BITCH“ He exclaimed in response while Utahime facepalmed.

The two young adults had collected all the drinks they needed and were ready to walk back to the group. ‘come on (Y/N) you’ve liked this man forever now and everyone knows he must like you back ITS NOW OR NEVER HOE’ (Y/N) screamed words of encouragement to herself before grabbing Noritoshi’s sleeve.

“Is everything alright (Y/N)?” “I have something ive been meaning to tell you Nori, I um like you a lot and i’d like to take you out if you dont mind” (Y/N) had practically yelled at the poor boy because of her stupid nerves and adrenaline.

The silence was broken by an angelic laughter coming from none other than Noritoshi Kamo. “Well i would’ve liked to be the one to take you out but i guess sometimes its alright for traditions and stereotypes to be broken by the younger generation” Nori responded as he walked closer to (Y/N) wrapping his arms around her and pulling her into a sweet kiss. The kiss was messy and clearly new to the both but filled with much love and passion that was finally being expressed by the pair.

As their lips eventually pulled away never wanting this to end, heavy breaths filled the air and cheeks flushed but all that was interrupted by a white haired male clapping in the background screaming “YES I WIN” while the other teacher crouched to the ground tears in her eyes.

#kamo noritoshi #noritoshi kamo x reader #jjk x reader #jjk fluff #jujustu kaisen #jjk noritoshi

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