#i have a lot of thoughts on sky this episode

[secretinasecret]

"Bridgerton Season 3 Feels Different", and I need to vent because this is UNACCEPTABLE

Look, every man of the ton looked great, especially Colin in his pirate outfit. They clearly spent a lot of time making sure his first appearance was impactful.

His hair was perfect, his walk was perfect, and that coat was absolutely stunning. No notes on that look—it was flawless. It’s obvious a lot of thought and effort went into it.

But the amount of "🤨" I pulled every time I saw the women's costumes was insane.

Cressida, especially. She's supposed to be a regal lady with cruel intentions, not someone from District One ready to send Katniss Everdeen some sponsors!

I get that her "shoulder pads" kept getting larger with each episode to show how hard she was trying to look "bigger," but seriously, couldn’t the costume designers have done that with better-looking outfits?

And let's talk about the audacity of not fleshing out Colin as a character. The new showrunner was Chris's right-hand woman, so she clearly took some notes on how Chris did things.

But it felt like she had been waiting for this moment and decided to do everything simultaneously out of sheer excitement.

The plot sticks to the books, the sets are grand and lavish, but what about the main leads of the season?!

What this season desperately needed was a flashback of Colin in his youth. Why does he travel so much? What are his likes and dislikes? Why should we even root for him?

Is it so hard to include a 2-minute sequence of young Colin and Penelope in a four-hour season? Seriously.

What's worse is that it is CONFIRMED there won't be any flashbacks to young Polin this season. This is INSANE, this BLASPHEMY. Now, no one will want to root for Colin because they won't even know who he IS.

The real issue is that they hyped it up way too much. If they’d just given us a short teaser and a simple trailer—sans the endless PR and hundreds of interviews—we wouldn't have had sky-high expectations.

The folks who only tuned in for season three and have nothing to compare it to are loving it. Good for them.

But for those of us who saw the spoilers and fan edits, we were set up for disappointment. I wish I could have just enjoyed what we got, but alas, I’m a perfectionist, especially when it comes to my favorite couple in the entire series.

Y'all no one wants this season to turn around more than I do. I’m desperate for it to pick itself up, give us a hard shake, and actually deliver something worth gushing over.

[tellmegoodbye]

-> Music Monday

It's Monday, so you know what that means...more songs!!

I made this post the other day going over the details of how this tag works, as well as linking the playlists and docs! Don't worry if a song you wanted to submit is already there, because adding your own thoughts and interpretations is a completely valid way to contribute!

Today, I have four soundtrack songs, as well as one Tarlos song and one Jace song.

How Did You Love - Shinedown

This song is very important to me, being one of my favorite songs by one of my favorite bands. Lone Star and OG both have incredible music taste, what can I say? It's a very Owen coded song to me.

"What is the legacy that you're going to leave behind? It's a song that is a lot about reflection and understanding that it's better to give love than to spread hate." - Shinedown

In the video that I linked above the band explains that the meaning of this song is about accepting that one day, your time will be up, and that it's important to focus on what we leave behind when we're gone. That is Owen to me. He is someone who is learning to accept his mortality and put all of his efforts into being a good father, and a good captain. In 1x02, the episode this song is from, he is still coming to terms with his cancer and what that is going to mean for him going forward. He has to learn to accept the things he can't control, and focus on the things that matter most.

"No one gets out alive. Every day is do or die. The one thing you leave behind is how did you love? How did you love?"

Simple Man - Lynyrd Skynyrd

Another god tier song from 1x02. This song reminds me a lot of Owen, Gwyn and TK. It's an anthem for the way they love him. The lyrics “don't forget son, there is someone up above” make me think of how Gwyn is watching over him even after she's gone.

Also, Shinedown did a cover of this song that blows the original out of the water. Just so you know.

Breathe - Fleurie

The lyrics “when will we finally breathe” are on my blog title for a reason. This song reminds me of Push, and One Day (the episode the song is from) which is my second favorite episode in the whole show!

There's a feeling I get when listening to this song that is similar to the way I feel when I watch these episodes, like something is building up until suddenly all of the emotion comes pouring out and there's nothing you can do to stop it.

Amen - Amber Run

Such a good song for 3x08! It's the perfect song for TK and Gwyn and the lyrics definitely speak to his struggles with addiction, as well as the way he's feeling after she dies.

"Oh, is there a heaven? You'd know now you've been"

"Are those real stars that hang in the sky? Or are they man-made, a trick of the light?"

"Cause the devil is raging inside my mind And is there a moment when it all makes sense? When saying goodbye doesn't feel like the end?"

"Sometimes I'd rather be dead, at least then I'm with you, amen"

Now that I've gotten the soundtrack songs out of the way, I'm going to share my other two songs!

If It Keeps You Up At Night - The Swoons

I've seen the world on top of your shoulders You lift me up 'cause you know I'm smaller When this life's a concert I can't see When I'm black and blue you paint me brighter And raise me up just like a lighter Even through the darkest symphony

And if it keeps you up at night I'll stay up and learn the words to all the songs that you like So if your eyes are open wide I can sing you something sweeter than that devil in your mind And if it still keeps you up at night I won't hold it against you I'll just hold, hold you tight

This song is perfect for Tarlos. It's about them loving each other even through the hard times. The lyrics in the chorus specifically are what I think they are feeling when they watch each other struggle with grief, addiction, and everything else. The first scene it reminds me of is the dining table scene in 3x13, but it could apply to many other scenes too.

Are You Still Waiting For Me? - Vian Izak

Traveling this road alone Made my heart heavy like a stone But when I think of you, I feel hope Are you still waiting for me, love?

I fall so many times, oh no But standing up makes me strong I need you in my life, you're the one Are you still waiting for me, love?

This is the song that reminds me of early Jace. When Judd finally sees Grace again when Tommy is in labor and he's uncertain of whether or not she still wants to be with him. He's wondering if she's still waiting for him.

No pressure tagging: @strandnreyes @nancys-braids @carlos-in-glasses @goodways @lemonlyman-dotcom

@carlos-tk @literateowl @eclectic-sassycoweyes @herefortarlos @thisbuildinghasfeelings

@freneticfloetry @bonheur-cafe @captain-gillian @heartstringsduet @welcometololaland

[bird-inacage]

Love in the Air: Sky’s Desire to be Loved

Sky is already breaking my heart. What I really picked up on in this episode is despite the pain, disappointment and trauma Sky carries with him, he still ultimately just wants to be loved.

At the race, when he first realises Prapai is staring at him, he looks slightly taken aback in a pleasantly surprised sort of way. Like ‘oh, he noticed me’. It’s evident that Sky finds Prapai very attractive, and so when Prapai takes him aside, you can tell that Sky is shy, nervous even. That’s the sort of reaction you only have in front of someone you potentially like. However, as soon as Prapai comes out with his proposition, Sky’s impression of him immediately does a 180. You can tell how hurt he is by this revelation. It’s not simply ‘oh this guy is an asshole too’, but more so, ‘why is this happening to me again?’

The fact that Sky agrees to their one night stand is more than just about repaying a favour or rising to the challenge. To me this is a sign of self-destructive behaviour. I think he resorts to his usual defence mechanism which is playing nonchalant. Maybe if he pretends to be unaffected and somehow detached from this emotionally, he won’t be hurt when it dawns on him all over again that this was purely a physical transaction. But he goes into this knowing that he’s hurt, hurting and will be hurt further by it.

I think Sky feels better when he has control and is taking the initiative. Because then something at least is on his terms, and he can convince himself he’s okay that it is just sex.

So Sky chooses to give in purely to lust, and to allow that to sweep him away. He is able to enjoy their night together simply on a physical level. However, immediately afterward you can tell Sky is unhappy, empty and regretful. He feels like nothing but an object of desire. His attempt to detach himself emotionally wasn’t successful. So he reaches for Prapai again for that momentary high. The brief comfort that comes from connecting with someone during sex is only temporary.

People who have experienced abusive or toxic relationships, desperately want the other person to love them equally, and are therefore willing to compromise their own discomfort, their own boundaries and concede to more and more to please that person.

I do also think that some people who are desperately seeking love, sometimes mistake any form of intimacy as a substitute. They’ll take what is offered to them, even if it makes them feel bad about themselves. Which is why I believe Sky continued to engage with Prapai that night, because he probably tried to convince himself that it was enough, which clearly backfired.

Then we see Sky leave the hotel, looking so dejected, small and alone. What kills me about these scenes is the quiet resignation in Sky’s acceptance of the situation. He just looks like he’s thinking ‘how could you be so stupid?’ And when he says “you’re also an asshole” - he sounds genuinely disappointed. Like he was really hoping Prapai would be different and prove him wrong.

Sky then returns home where he clearly wants to cry but holds it in. I think Sky believes that if he truly broke down in that moment, then he would have truly admitted defeat. That it would be affirmation that he has allowed this to get to him and hurt him, when he was so determined not to let that happen again.

“Shitty things always happen to me”. When bad things happen repeatedly to someone, it’s easy to internalise that as if it is somehow your fault because the common denominator is you.

Later in the episode, there are multiple scenes where Sky reiterates that he doesn’t think Prapai would ever truly be interested in him. That Prapai’s interest in pursuing him is just for sex.

When he answers Prapai’s call for the first time, he doesn’t yet know who it is, and yet Prapai crosses his mind. This shows that Prapai did leave an impression on him. Sky has not completely erased him from his mind.

The other important detail to note here is that even though Sky deems Prapai an ‘asshole’, he doesn’t at any point say he’s not attracted to him. He’s always commenting on how he feels Prapai wouldn’t be attracted to him. This demonstrates that Sky does genuinely believe (despite all his negative impressions) that Prapai is out of his league and would never take real notice of him. He would not be having these thoughts if he didn’t like Prapai on some level. And he hates himself for that, because he feels he should know better.

It’s because he’s attracted to Prapai that he can’t help feeling taken by Prapai’s advances. He even peers out of the window to see if Prapai is still there. He repeatedly tells himself to shake out of it, knowing he shouldn’t entertain these delusions.

In the last scene where Sky receives the sunflowers, he’s taken aback for a moment when Prapai tells him why he sent them. “Cause sunflowers face the sky, I can’t be the sun for you but whenever you see sunflowers, remember that this wind’s watching over the sky”.

Sky is aware that Prapai is sweet talking. But he can’t help himself from being genuinely touched for a moment, like his brain is going ‘see, someone is doing this for you, that must mean something right?’.

At this stage Prapai doesn’t fully mean it. Not really. The man has no idea what his own feelings for Sky are. But this was still surprisingly heartfelt and sweet. A passing comment which meant a whole lot to Sky in that moment because it was so nice to just hear someone try and sweet talk him for once - regardless of how genuine it was.

Sky is clearly conflicted over his feelings around Prapai. He knows he should be staying well away, but at the same time he can’t help but want to be the object of someone’s attentions. Little does he know how deeply Prapai will come to love him.

[incendiorum]

inter mundos's inspiration re: the whole teleporting thing came from a series called f.ringe - specifically the season 2 episode 'jacksonville' where it's revealed that while objects can be sent to the parallel universe that exists, something must come back from said parallel universe to make it 'even.' this is specifically shown as really bad in this episode because an entire building from the parallel universe teleports into the main universe and they have to act very quickly to figure out which building from the main universe is going to suddenly disappear to make it an even exchange. this is done in a couple of ways, one of them being calculating the sizes of every building in the area to find one that's approximately the same size and then evacuating it. which I hope sounds kind of familiar, because that's some of the same logic inter mundos runs on. it finds a building approximately its size, schloops it out of reality for a bit, and replaces it. when it's time to leave it sucks the original building back into its place and vanishes. io specifically has applied a bit of logic to this, and troubleshot a lot of things over the years. inter mundos not only targets buildings its size, but also abandoned/empty ones. inter mundos is also a little freaky to be in once it settles because it attaches itself to whatever grid it needs. water, power, etc. which means things in the walls... move. it can also settle itself in empty areas, too, but if io is working in a city for a bit then it's easiest to replace a building with their own.

[frogandbird]

Strawberry Skys - Chapter Fifteen - Fish Scales and Old Scars

[Prev] - [First] - [Next]

“English” ‘TSL’ *Common*

Oreo scrambled out of the pool, dripping wet and with a wild grin on her face. He moved to stand next to April, who was also socked, and shook themselves off with a wild shake.

April yelped and raised an arm to block her face, laughing. “Dude!”

Oreo looked at her wild grin and hands in the t-rex pose that Violet loved doing. He raised their tail, still dripping wet.

April pointed at her, phone in her other hand. “Don’t. You. Dare.”

“CANNON BALL!”

Oreo jumped back as water splashed everywhere, courtesy of Sky, as he jumped from the zipline the siblings had set up.

Sky clambered out of the pool, also grinning as Oreo blew a raspberry at him.

“Did you record that!?” Sky was almost bouncing up to April, who grinned.

“Of course I did, now move-“ April smirked at Sky, then began to wrestle him out of the way so she could record the other two.

Oreo took the already broken phone and held it, watching with amusement as their older siblings yelled insults at each other.

Violet yelled something that Oreo couldn’t make out, loud and long as the water splashed around them.

Violet whooped loudly as they floated in the pool, laughing.

*Onix is coming down soon!* Oreo raised one hand to their mouth to call, clicking at Violet.

“Yeah yeah.” Violet swam to the ladder, easing themselves out right as Onix came crashing down.

Onix had forgone yelling, instead churring loudly as she crashed into the pool.

Violet was sent flying (like two feet) out of the pool and spinning next to Sky and April. The pair dragged Violet into their wressle as the softshell crashed into them.

Oreo grinned at Onix, who had emptied most of the pool with her jump. Onix was laughing and was pulling herself out of the pool with ease.

*Sorry, don't have much of a pool anymore.* Onix laughed, standing up.

Oreo clicked a laugh, turning April's phone off. Onix huffed as she spotted the others.

Sky had a hand in Violet's face, leg pinning the soft shell down. April had Sky in a headlock, and was attempting to trip Violet. Violet was biting Skys leg, and somehow avoiding April's kicks.

Oreo trilled and ran to join in, ignoring Onixs sigh.

Oreo jumped on April's back, affefefovly toppling her, sky, violet, and themselves onto the ground. she squealed as violet jumped on them, laughing as Sky yelled curses and April joined in.

Big hands picked Oreo up. He looked up and wagged her tail as Onix held both her and Violet.

Onix had her bandana and wraps back on, having taken them off to jump in the pool. the red marks on the corners of her mouth where quirked up in a small smile and the scars around her eyes crinkled as she looked down on them.

“Now that we have effectively drained the pool-“

“That was all you!” Sky was laughing as he de-tangled himself from April.

“Now that we have effectively drained the pool,” Onix rolled her eyes and started again. “You guys wanna go do something else?”

*Park!* Oreo yelled, swinging his arms up. Onix did not manage to avoid being smacked in the face. *They have a basketball hoop at Rucker Park, right?*

Violet wiggled free of Onixs hold. “Yes they do, should we go?”

“Yes!” Sky draped himself over his twin, grinning as Violet shoved a hand in his face.

“As long as I get a ride.” April took back her phone from Oreo, who handed it back with a small hiss. April hissed back at them.

“Naturally.” Violet began messing with their battle shell, which extended until the main body of a motorbike, but with jetpacks instead of wheels.

April grinned and jumped to get on, Violet beginning to hover in the air as the jetpacks kicked in.

Sky was stretching his arms up, keeping himself moving as Oreo twisted out of Onixs grasp. She hung from Onixs arm by her tail for a few seconds before letting themselves fall to the ground.

The five began to run and jump over rooftops, yelling and whooping as they went.

Oreo yelled as she jumped over a particularly big gap, Onixs guiding hand behind him.

Oreo had noticed the oldest had a tendency to herd them over buildings and gaps, even if they were more than big enough to jump the gaps themselves. and it wasn't just Oreo who Onix gridded, The snapper would do it to all four of them. It was sweet, but it happened a lot. Who would be there for Onix when she needed it?

Oreo huffed and pulled out of their thoughts, something yellow and blue pulling at their vision.

The yellow thing was forgotten about when Onix crashed into a brick wall.

“Yo sis, you good?” Sky peaches over the edge of the building, grinning.

Oreo churred from their spot on the lip of the building, right where they landed. Violet and April flew over the gap, flying down to Onix.

Onix had her claws dug into the brick, no more than some scuffed scales on her face as she looked around. *’m good.*

Onix shook herself out. *Thought I saw something.* Onix eased herself onto the roof, next to Oreo.

*I saw something yellow and blue!* Onix added, swishing their tail around.

“Oh good, I'm not going insane.” onix huffed, giving Oreo a head pat.

“No, both of you are going insane.” Sky snickered as he got close to Onix, waving a finger in front of her face.

“Nah I saw it too.” April grinned, her arms crossed and leaning on Violet's head.

“Yay. All three of my siblings are officially-“ Violets smirk was cut off as Sky yelped.

“It’s a dog thingy!” With that, Sky took off after something, jumping off of the roof and running into the nearby construction site.

Oreo turned to look at Onix, who raised a hand to point at him.

“Don’t. You. Dare.”

Oreo leaded off of the building, cackling as they caught themselves on the new hand holds. They were off the building and running after Sky before Onix could yell his name.

Oreo found Sky edging closer to a big cat looking thing. It had big blue ears, a cat-like body that was mostly yellow, small tusks, and a vial with blue and red stuff in it. The blue on its ears tracked down its back, giving way to a red tipped tail.

the small thing was courring under a pile of wood, and kept glancing at the street before looking back at a particular pile of bricks.

*We gonna pet it?* Oreo poked their head out from behind the truck they had hid behind, Sky next to them.

Sky jumped slightly before replying. “Oh definitely.”

The pair sent wayward glances out at the street before slowly walking forward, both making clicking noises at the small cat-dog-thing.

The small critter clearly heard them, looking at the pair and tilting its head. It suddenly moved back, furr puffing up.

“What do you two think you are doing?” Onix spoke, directly behind the pair. Oreo jumped away, hissing slightly as Sky yelled and also jumped back.

The small thing leapt forward, claws out and scratching. Onix yelped, reaching up to grab at the thing as it tore at her face.

Onix finlay grabbed its scruff, pulling it away from her. the thing was still hissing, but now it was curled in Onixs grasp.

“Onix! Put the put little guy down!” April jumped off the hover shell and walked over with Violet.

Onix rolled her eyes but let go of the small thing, and with a blur pop it was gone.

Oreo joined his siblings in the yelling as Onix dragged a hand over her face.

The small thing reappeared in Aprils arms, hissing at Onix. Onix hissed back.

April blow a raspberry at Onix.

Onix dramatically gasped and put a hand to her chest.

“Bitch.”

“Hey-“

“Uh guys?” Sky butted into the older sibling play fight, making Oreo glance around.

They yelled and hissed at the sight of two massive humans with small dogs walking towards them. She scrambled up Onixs arm, perching on her shoulders, hissing.

Onix spun, looking between the dog-cat-thing and back at the humans. She began to growl, putting herself, and Oreo by extension, between the rest of the siblings and the humans.

One of the humans huffed and pointed at the small thing, still in April's arms. “give us the agent,..” the human sniffed. “How you say..”

“Pretty Please.” the other spoke, a dead tone as they pointed at the dog-cat- Ok Oreo was just gonna call it a cat. “Or we will destroy you..”

Onix growled louder as the siblings whispered behind her shell.

“What's the chance of us actually giving this thing to them?” Sky snuck a glance at the men before looking back at the others.

“Do not threaten my siblings.” Onix was growling the spikes on her cheeks and arm raising slightly.

“Oh zero. Not happening.” Violet hummed, petting the small fluffy thing as April held it.

*So…* Oreo leaned back, hands and tail keeping them in place on Onixs shell. *We fighting for them or running?*

“You do not threaten us child.” One of the men spoke, making Oreo pull themselves back up to look at them.

“Hey! Onix is the oldest!” Sky chirped, clambering to stand on her shell.

“How old is onix?” April spoke up, but no one awncred as the men came forward, heavy steeps and all.

Oreo clicked in surprise as both men transformed before them,dogs and all.

Purple and yellow lights filtered around them, clothing farming into sharp and jagged armor. What little hair they had vanished and big red eyes took over most of their head as a second pair of arms grew.

Their dog jumped from their carriers, suddenly becoming big enough for their friends to ride. they too became sharp and dark, but their eyes were small and they had the normal amount of libs that dogs had.

“So,..” Sky started and everyone started to groan. “You guys from jersey?”

Oreo turned on Onix shoulders, looking at Sky. Sky had his arms behind his back, leaning on his sword. He was grinng. Onix stopped growling for a moment to give Sky a look.

“What! I can't joke in the middle of the wildest thing ever?” Sky switched to wildly jestering with both of his swords.

*I wanna use these now!* Oreo jumped up, holding his numb-chucks and spinning them around.

Sky and Violet yelled in compensation and jumped forward, all three of them ignoring the hiss from Onix.

Both of the dogs lunged forward, their riders hanging back.

Violet hung back grinning. “Guys, Guys. I got this.”

Oreo glanced back in time to see them bringing their bō out and spinning it wildly.

Oreo laughed as they lunged forward, swinging his numb-chuckles wildly. She managed to grab one of the dogs by its throat, pinning it down so that she could give it a few good kicks to its head.

The dog howled and suddenly jetted up, its dark claws dinging against the chain. The chain protested with a dull whine.

It finally gave, sending Oreo yelping as they flew back, skidding to a stop in Onixs arms as she studded him.

Oreo growled and tossed aside the broken weapon, lunging forward to try and hit the dog again.

Both dogs spun on them, one head butting him right in the gut and truly sending him flying.

Oreo groggily sat up from the wood pile, looking about.

A thing made from stone gargoyle teeth was beginning to close, stone jaws slowly easing close as the tails of the dogs disappeared into the sea of blue.

A crash made Oreo look to the left of the brick lie that held the portal, seeing the green pile that was Onix and Sky. Sky was sitting up on Onix, rubbing his head as he looked at the portal. Onix was laying flat, but her tail lashed from side to side.

Violet suddenly appeared in their vision, offering a hand. Oreo took it and let themselves be hoisted up.

A green and yellow blob suddenly shot past, making Violet yell.

Oreo looked back at the portal in time to see April dive into the portal, which snapped shut with a clang, and the small flash of a blue symbol inprinted on the bricks.

“Ah fuck.” Sky finally stood, kicking at the broken pieces of his katanas.

Onix was able to stand now. She scooped up the broken swords and the weapons that Oreo also broke.

“So..” Violet hummed, picking at their bō. “We going after her?”

“Dude,” Sky huffed. “We gotta get into wherever she went.” Sky stretched, wincing

*it had a ruin on it! Looked like one of the things on dads ‘do not touch’ shelf.” Oreo checked on their tail and leg, where they had taken most of the second blow. A few scraped scales and a small bruise forming.

“Dad has a portal carver?” Onix looked up.

All three of the siblings turned on her.

“A what.” Violet was looking at Onix like she had just given them permission to blow up a project because it wasn't working right. Pure dumbfoundedness.

Sky had the same exact expression, but he was waving his hands around and not leaning on a bō staff. Oreo knew that they had the same look.

Onix stood fully, hands still holding onto the broken weapons. “A portal carver. helps one make portals?” She tilted her head at them, a confused look on her face like she had told them about this before.

When none of them responded, Onix sighed and dragged her free hand over her face. “If dad has one, let’s go and get it.”

All of the siblings nodded and followed, to dumbfounded about this new information to really talk.

—

Sky glanced into the main room of the layer, hissing he caught sight of their Dad in his chair, watching a show on the projector. Vi and Oreo bubbled up near him, watching for any sign of movement from their dad as Onix stood behind them.

The eldest sighed. “I'm returning this stuff back to the dojo. you lot can go get the portal carver.” With that, she set off for the dojo, her tail hitting the steps as she climbed them.

Sky winced at the noise but glanced back at dad. Who had not moved.

“Did he pass out again?” Vi crept forward, bō in one hand.

“Maybe. Oreo, what did that thing look like?” Sky pulled Vi back and glanced at Oreo, who swished their long tail.

*Like..* Oroe hummed. *The blue run-thing was a shape- there-hold on* Oreo growled, then switched to signing. ‘It was an M shape with an extra line on the first stroke of the M.’

“i'm not remembering that. Vi you're on watch duty, Oreo with me!” Sky grabbed Oreos wrist, ignoring the protests from their twin.

The pair darted up to the dojo, easing the old doors open so that they didn't scrape against the concrete floor.

They left the door open as they snuck over to the corner of the room, the one that had a lowered ceiling from the stares bore it. Sky moved the curtain aside, lifting it so that the metal hooks didn't scrape on the metal pole.

Oreo was already looking over the shelves, ones full of dads ribbons and trinkets. keepsakes and the like. Sky never knew where or how he got ahold of the things, but Mom always told them to not ask.

Sky leaned against the wall with his arms crossed, watching as Oreo looked over each thing and disregarded all of them.

Oreo let out a triumphant trill as they moved aside a heavy book and picked up a small thing. Sky paid them no mind as he spotted something sticking out of the book.

“Hey Oreo.” Sky bent down, pulling the pale thing from its hiding spot. “What’s in the book?”

*Don't know. Cover is in Japanese.* Oroe looked up, still clutching the small thing in one hand.

“huh.” Sky looked at the pale thing. It was burned, nothing on one side.

Flipping it over, old polaroid photo, heavily burned but Sky could see silver eyes on green scales. Someone was in the background, faded uriel and red against blue. Two dark spots were next to the green one, but Sky couldn’t tell if it was scorch marks or the actual photo.

Oreo looked over his shoulder, tilting their head and hissing.

“It’s an old photo. No idea of who.” Sky held it up, letting Oreo take it. “Hey, be careful. it's old and really burned.”

Oroe clicked and looked at it, squinting. *Looks kind of like Oni.*

“Wait what.” Sky took the photo back, squinting at it.

Oreo pointed at the green blob, then traced a finger over a lighter, almost white mark. *see the scar? looks like Onixs.*

“huh.” Sky hummed.

*Hey guys! gotta go!* Violets yell made Sky and Oreo both jump.

Oreo sliding off of Skys shoulder as they ran out of the room. Neither bothered to move the citroen or door back, too intent on getting back to Violet before dad woke up.

They slid down the skate ramps, running over to Violet right as Onix could be heard thumping down the stares.

“Wow. None of you are stealthy.” Violet looked up from their phone, sly grin on their face.

“Hey!” Sky crossed his arms. “If Dads’ awake, why keep quiet?”

“Oh he's not. April texted. Found something dangerous.” Violet waved and began to walk out, making all of the siblings groan.

Onix grabbed Oreo before they could run back to the dojo, herding Sky along. “Let’s go get april. You get the portal carver?”

“Yep. Oreo has it.” Sky snaked out of his sister's grasp, moving to walk next to his twin.

Oreo clicked in comprenation.

—

All four of the siblings stood in front of the brick pile, taking in the pure ordinary gray bricks. Onix held the carver in her claws, the thing far too small for her fingers.

Sky leaned against one of the building's pillars, arms crossed as he watched. Violet was next to him, phone out and undoubtedly recording.

Onix mumbled something as she began to trace the rune onto bricks, most likely the rune Oreo had seen. The snapper growled as she traded it twice, a third time, and finally a fourth.

Her tail lashed and she flung the samll thing into hte ground, hissing things at it.

“With would be funny if it wasn't so sad.” Sky snickered.

Onix huffed, her tail still hitting the ground as she moved aside.

Oroe clicked from Onixs shoulders, hands on her plasttern as he butted heads with Onix.

“yeah yeah, im fine Haru.” Onix stepped back. Oreo took this chance to hiss at her and jumped down, picking up the small charm.

Sky glanced at Oreo as they began to trace the same ruin into the wall. Then looked back as a flash of blue caught his vision.

All of the siblings looked at the wall, the stone teeth and blue portal open once again.

“So.” Sky clapped his hands together.

“What the fuck.” Violet finished, hands also clapped together.

Onix dragged a hand over her face. “guys.”

Sky and Violet both blinked at her.

Onix jestured to the portal with one hand. “Cannonball?”

*“CANNONBALL!”* All three of the siblings yelled and jumped into the portal, not waiting to see if Onix followed.

—

Sky grinned as he landed, only needing to wave his arms to stay balanced. Oreo and Violet both groaned from next to him, having fallen face first.

A heavy thunk made him stumble and fall, the chuckles of Onix making him growl at her. Sky pushed himself up, sticking his tongue out at the snapper. Onix was using one of the nearby pillars to help pull herself up. She grinned and waved her hand at Sky. Sky gave her the best middle finger he could.

Sky looked around, taking in the sights. The sky wasn’t a dark blue anymore, but now a vibrant but dark green. small specks were in the sky, much like stars. He stared at it for many long moments. Sky finally toor his gaze away from the sky and looked down at the city below.

A sea of reds and browns and yellows stretched far into the distance, large shapes moving about the buildings. sky could see dark green pillars leading and fading into the sky.

Big hands picked sky up, making him spin to face whoever had picked him up. Onix slow blinked at him, tilting her head.

“I'm good! this place is so big!” Sky spun back to look at the city. Even with the big things moving, it was strangely quiet.

“And this isn’t even-“ Onix was cut off by a yell from April and Vi.

“Guys!” April ran up to the group, grinning.

Sky jumped out of Onixs hold and ran up to his sister, spinning her around.

“Hey!” April grinned down at him, her arms trapped by his.

*Where are we?* Oreo finally asked the question that none of them had asked yet.

“Ah ha!” Violet grinned at the screen on their arm. “according to my calculations, we are in a tertiary meta-verse!”

April gave them a deadpan look as Sky set her down. “Actually we’re in a hidden city deep under New York.” She grinned at Violet, who raised an eyebrow.

“Yeah. Sure. Like Onis stories.” Violet rolled their eyes and waved one hand in front of their face.

“My stories are more than just-“ Onix was cut off again as April spoke up.

“Oh, and the dog thingy is in there!” April pointed triumphantly at a building behind them.

Sky peaked over Parils shoulder, wide eyed at the sight of the massive round building.

It looked like a massive black bubble, a variety of different shapes jetting off of it. A bright colored dragonfly was on the side of the bubble, reds and oranges bright on the blacks and grays.

All five of them shared a look before they darted into the bubble building, following Prils lead as she wove up the dark steps.

Once they reached the door, April stopped. Vi keeps up behind her, looking to the dark gray and purple lock.

“Oh i so want to do my lab back home in these colors.” Vi hummed as they looked at the door. They shook themselves out and tried the handle. It didn’t move.

Oreo came up next, also trying the handle. Then they pushed in. Then pulled the handle out.

“How did you open this when you went in? Did you go in?” Sky looked at April, who was also studying the door.

“Oh yeah, I went in. But i got the door before it closed, didn't open it.” April waved him away, making Sky huff.

Sky glanced back, looking for Onix as he took count of the others. Onix was hanging back, still several years away as she slowly climbed the steps. Sky huffed.

“Yo sis!” Onix looked up, big silver-green eyes locking with Sky’s as he spoke. “You gonna come up here?”

Onix nodded, hurrying her pace to re-join the group in only a few minutes.

“Hey big guy,” Violet waved Onix forwarded, pointing at the door. “Can you open this?”

“I can try.” Onix spoke quietly, but made her way up to the door.

The siblings parted to give her space, letting her rest one hand on the door.

“Don’t bother with the door handle, it’s locked or-“ Violet was huffy, arms crossed as they let Onix take over with the door.

They were cut off with a click as Onix turned the handle and pushed the door open.

All of them stared at her, but Onix just put her hands up in surrender. Her tail was kept in the door, keeping it open.

Violet grumbled as April laughed, both making their way into the stand building. Oreo went next, glancing back and grinning. Sky was apparently next, made evident by how Onix stayed still.

Sky patted Onixs arm as he passed, watching for any and all reaction. She was looking back onto the city, eyes lit silver in the strange light.

Sky huffed and continued into the dark building.

—

April had led them through gray and vine covered halls and passages, eventually dumping them out into a massive room.

The room must have taken up half the building, tall spears keeping the ceiling up. Sky looked up and blinked. The orange-red dragonfly was apparently a stained window, the wings casting ombré light into the room.

The main pillar was something to marvel at, and what drew Skys full attention. The puller was wide at its base, three vine cages and a contral looking panel adorning it. One of the cages held the delivery boy that had fallen into the portal, just vines holding him back.

The other one held the small cat-dog-thing, vines and a forcefield of some kind keeping it in place. The small thing kept trying to teleport out, but the field glowed before the little guy popped back right where it had been standing just a second before.

The next part up was a dark green and purple, as plants curled up the dark metal. The last section was something akin to a lightbulb shape, one filled with a lava looking liquid.

“Oh I am so doing my lab like this when we get home.” Vi muttered next to Sky, tail wagging.

Sky snorted as he pulled back from the edge of the walk why they had all perched on. Onix was arching with a glazed look in her eyes, silver replacing the familiar green. Oreo was perched on her shoulders, looking around as they took everything in. April was pacing, bat in hand.

“We gotta get that thing out.” April finally stilled, looking at everyone as she spoke.

“yeah sure, but only vi has anything sharp to get it out. or, Onix did you get anything when we were home?” Sky pointed at Vi, who hissed at him, then nodded at Onix.

*Someone called us to leave before I could get my stuff.” Onix shook her head, blinking back to reality.

“Oh!” APril flipped her bat down, leaning on it. “I saw a weapon stash when i was exploring erler! I think I can find it again.”

“let's go then!” Sky jumped up, then offered a hand to Vi, who took it.

April led them down the dark halls again, stopping several times to check or turn them back around.

Violet ran a hand over the purple vines, and looked to be studying them as they walked. Oreo was jumping between everyone, looking at everything and sending glances at Onix.

Onix, for the record, was walking slowly and seemed to be lost in her mind as she walked behind everyone. Somehow she didn't run into walls or trip over vines as they waked.

April finally stopped at a door, testing it. She grinned as it swung open easily.

“Here we go!” Shr stepped in, the others following.

The room was cooked full of gear and tools, but the real show stopper was the glowing shelf of weapons; and best yet, weapons they could use.

Sky grinned and ran up to the wall, ignoring the sounds of his family oozing and awwwing at the gear. Jumping to grab the sword, he spun and slashed the air with it, grinning wildly. Vi came up and inspected the sword.

Oreo jumped past, running away from Onix. Onix had two sticks in one hand as she tried to contain the box turtle.

April walked up to the twins, all three of them watching the free show.

April held out a purple stick with a million and one pointy thing on it to Violet. Violet took it and looked it over, but shook their head and handed it back to April. She shrugged and shoved it into the strap that held her bat most of the time.

Vi began to wander around, looking at things. Sky swung the sword over his shoulder and snickered as Onix finally grabbed Oreo.

Onix held Oreo in one hand, swinging her head to look at each of them. “Why do we need weapons to cut some vines?”

“Cus. Also, dad deshell us if we don't have weapons for training tomorrow.” Sky switched to balancing his weight onto his new sword, tsating it.

Onix sighed and began to lead the way out of the room.

Sky clicked at Violet. Vi looked up, glanced at Onixs disappearing form, then ran to join Sky.

—

They got back to their vantage point as a man in blue armor was talking to the human in the cage. Another human in black and red stood next to the man. The cat thing was growling.

Sky layed down, watching lazily as the man took the blue vial that had been on the cat and dumped it into something on the control(?) panel.

Sky watched as the lava looking liquid shifted to a glowing green, bright and stark against everything else in the lab. The human fell silent for a second, then began to talk hardly again.

The man in the blue armor went over to another cage, taking a small bug out of it. They then lifted it into the sky, letting the small thing fly into the green liquid.

*Oh that dose not look good.* Vi hissed from next to Sky.

*If Ihave learned anything from jupiter Jim Movies,* Sky started, clicking with a grin on his face. Oreo stole his thunder.

*It's that Glowing green is Bad.*

The human in the cage asked something.

The man in blue armor finally spoke loud enough from them to hear.

“It will if I am doing it right.”

The bug had wrapped and grown, changing to be almost three times its original size. SKy could see green and orange things on it now.

It was then guided to the human in the cage, who tried to wince back.

Sky covered his ears as the screams started. He leaned into Onix, who was using one massive hand to cover his entire head for him.

Once the screams stopped Sky finally had the guts to look at the human. Well, not so human anymore.

It was now a massive silvery fish in human clothing, fins replacing arms and fish face replacing a human head. it wore the clothing it had on before, but it was clearly badly fitting and ragged now.

The not-so-human-thing was let go from its cage, the man letting it run away.

The man in blue armor turned and began to walk away, the human in black and red following.

Sky was the first to speak. “ok, that was discussing.”

“You think?” Vi gagged clutching their bō with an iron grip.

*What happened to him..?* Oreo looked at everyone, tail tip puffed up and curled tight against their body.

“Mutation.” Onix responded, looking deflated and tired. “It’s- That kind is messed up.”

“Returning to that later,” vi was stretching their hands repeatedly. “That was imitation crab.”

Oreo seemed to click into something. *ARE WE PART IMITATION CRAB!?*

Everyone sat in silence for several seconds. Violet began to snicker.

“Sorry,” Violet took a few moments to calm down. “No, we are turtles not crabs.”

Oreo visibly relaxed. Sky grinned.

Clicking made everyone turn to look down, spotting the other humans return to the main space.

The two humans were returning, the smaller one gesturing wildly before claiming as they came closer.

They were talking, just loud enough to be heard.

“The mutagen worked, like it did before.” The man spoke, his voice raspy.

“Will you continue with.. this?” the other spoke, giving a small jester to the lab around them.

The man hummed, but was stopped from saying anything as Oreo yelled and dropped down from the walk way they all stood on.

Sky and Violet jumped to stand next to them, both of them pointing their weapons at the humans. April and Onix moved to stand behind them, April only held back by Onix.

Sky took a satisfied note of how both humans flinched back at the sight of Onix, her form towering over all but the man in the room. Sky tilted his head with how the man was taller, but Oreo stoll his attention.

*Give us the little guy, and you’ll walk out of here with your horns still attached.* Oreo hissed, pointing their chained weapon at the man in blue.

Sky grinned. His little brother was terrifying when she wanted to be.

“Shouldn’t we also stop him from making crab men?” Sky piped up, a grin on his face.

Oreo nodded at him.

“Good. Ok, give us the little guy and stop making crab men-“ Sky leaned on his new sword, making himself out to be more relaxed then he was.

“Imitation crab men.” Vi also spoke up.

“Violettttt.” Sky groaned, letting himself sag down.

“What! we have to be accurate! It's science!” Violet waved their hands at the man.

“Ok, stop making imitation crab men-“ Sky started again, being cut off by Oreo.

*I want a ride home and pizza!*

“dude that sounds amazing, but priorities!”

“Wait- repeat that I wasn’t recording.”

“Hey!”

*take it from the top?*

“Yes I will.” Sky coughed into his hand, but was stopped from talking as April lunged forward, yelling.

“APRIL O’NEIL!”

*ohmigosh she just ran in!* Oreo clicked, hands up on their cheeks as April dove at the cage.

This seemed to shake everyone out of whatever pause they had been in.

Onix snapped their jaws shut behind Sky. Violet and Sky both jumped, and Oreo spun to look at the oldest before turning back to face the humans.

The one in blue armor took a step back, letting April jump at the cage. The human in black just stood lack, entire body bent to look past the man in blue to look at april.

Everyone stood in silence for several seconds before the man in blue armor slowly raised a hand to point at April.

The human in black took a few seconds before lunging at April, kicking her away from the cage.

The man in blue armor bullied something from their pouch, slamming their fist into the ground.

bright pink vines shot towards them, making Sky and the others jump around to try and dodge.

Sky could hear Violet and Oreo yelling, and the heavy footsteps of Onix, but he just tried to stay out of the way of the pink vine.

With a glance towards the others Sky skipped onto the vine, running towards the man in blue instead of keeping on the ledge.

“I hate this, I hate this so much!” Sky yelped, tripping and spinning on the vine so he was now clinging to it with all of his limbs and going backwards.

He clung to the vine as he heard Violet's jetpack power down, only turning his head when he heard the sounds of stones breaking.

“dude, seriously!?” Onix growled from below Sky, running along the vines with more skill than Sky though possible.

Sky turned his head to look at the thing, an amalgamation of purple flesh(?) and gold metal. Red glass eyes looked down at all of them.

“ONIII It looked at me!” Skew yelped and attempted to scramble back the way he had come, but was unsuccessful.

Whatever the thing was, it reached down to grab at the purples-pink vines. Skys eyes widened as he watched the thing pull the things out of the ground where they had spawned, then slam them down into the ground again.

Sky yelled as the wip-slash was felt almost instantly, sending all four of them flying into the air.

Sky whined as he slammed into the ground tumbling over until he was sitting tail up and arms splayed out on the floor.

he could see Vi splayed out over a vine to his side, and heard Onix growling from behind. Oreo was clicking up insults behind him. He would laugh if the purple-fold-flesh-thing didn't roar at them right that second.

April and the girl in black came into his vision for just a second before dancing out of it again.

“That hurt.” Sky growled and flopped back, begging to roll to his side to sit up.

“Capture those turtles! Leave the-“ Whatever else the man in blue was going to say was cut off by Onix and the purple thing.

The purple thing took a few steps forward, heavy and practically making wind as it moved.

“Cowabunga!” Onix growled a yell, pointing at the purple monster.

Sky was only a second away from reacting, pushing himself up the rest of the way as Oreo shot past him.

He grinned as he grabbed the new sword, dragging the edge along the stone floor as he ran in beside Onix.

Sky shifted, gathering energy and shooting past Oreo and under a fist that was sent his way by the purple monster.

sliding past the fist, he dove towards the leg. Forcing himself back on his feet again he brought his sword along the purple flesh, it was definitely flesh, of the things ankle.

Sky grunted as the blade worked through the stuff, coming out clean the other end.

Sky skidded to a stop, sword still up as he spun to face the thing once again.

Dust and small rocks flew past as the purple monster landed on its knees and most likely a fist.

The roar made him wince, louder than even Onix's loudest yells.

Sky stumbled as the ground shook. He flipped his sword to lean on the tip, grunting as he looked up.

The monster pulled mack its hand, tossing or throwing something that Sky couldn’t see.

The yell from Onix and Oreo made SKy grin again, picturing his siblings doing something stupid.

Violet's angry yells and curses and the tech bō spinning wildly out of control made Sky run back, pressing his shell against one of the control panels.

It was a good thing that he did that, as the next thing that happened was the monster getting slammed in the face by Onix, only to be flipped by a super powered tech bō.

The dust and smoke that was sent up from the blow made Sky raise one hand to cover his eyes, hissing at the sting of the heavy air on his new scrapes and cuts.

“Most impressive.”

Sky spun to look at the man in blue armor who had just spoken.

Now that he was closer, he could see the long goat-like ears and distinctly not human legs that were hidden by distance and the blue armor. The armor itself was interesting to look at, a dark red trim bold against the light blue of the layered and scale-like plates.

The most interesting part about them was the red diamonds on the mask, resting between the eyes and mimicking Onixs marks perfectly.

The not so human continued. “With a little training, you could be stronger than they ever hopped.”

Sky spun away from the man, jumping so he could reach the other turtles quickly.

Violet was sitting atop the purple monster, playing or texting on their phone. Oreo was laying shell down over some rocks and rubble, limbs all spread out as they panted. Onix was growling, slowly standing. Sky couldn’t pinpoint April, but he could hear her yelling insults at the other human.

Sky slid into place in front of Onix, swinging his sword down to lean on it as he propped it and a leg on a rock.

“Cool, cool. now that you are surrendering-“ Sky waved one hand around, flipping his new sword to rest on his shoulder.

“Baron Draxum can not surrender.” The man in blue armor growled.

Sky winced. Then shook himself out and returned to his shurade. “Okay, well, when he gets her,*and he probably won't* We’ll deal with him-“ Sky cut himself off with a laugh.

“ah ha! You’re doing that whole talking in third-person thing-“ Sky was cut off again as Onix placed a hand on his shoulder. He glanced at her, blinking at the anger in her eyes.

“Enough chitter chatter, let’s put our training to use.” With that, she leapt forward.

“what training? You guys have been training?” Sky whined as he followed suit, letting Oroe and Violet get a head start.

Sky leapt forward as the goat-man tossed and grabbed two small pelt things, dark purple vines growing to cover their arms in a second.

Onix rushed forward, managing to slam the man in the gut before a knee was brought up to hers.

Sky yelled a curse at them before somersaulting to bring his sword down on the gat-mans head.

A purple arm was brought up, a small spike growing from no where and tossing his sword, and himself, to the side.

He grunted, shifting his weight to stand on his hands and use the momentum to try to spin kick the man's head.

Sky managed to get a single kick to the man’s shoulder before he had to jump away, the sounds of Oreos chains filling his place not a second later.

Skidding on three of his limbs, Sky hissed and locked eyes with Onix, who was standing up herself.

The snapper nodded at the man, running forward with the new sticks up to try and punch the man again.

Sky also ran forward, but jumped up, planning to bring his sword down.

The goat man, ok he could probably start calling him Baron Draxum now, brought their arms up, only to slam them down again.

Sky yelped at the blast of purple-blue energy that was shot out, sending him flying for the millionth time that day.

A big arm caught him, most likely getting Oreo to form the squeak they let out.

“And that is why Baron Draxum-“

“Heads up!”

Sky looked up just in time to see the human in red and black nimbly escape a swing from April, only to be kicked in the shin.

The human, Sky was now only 90% sure they were human, fained falling over, starfish pose and all.

April gave a trumpet yell, grinning and giving all the turtles a thumbs up.

Sky returned the gesture.

The man in blue armor shot an arm out, spraying something that looked far too much like dirty spider webs from Skys liking at his sister.

Sky was suddenly dropped, Onix moving to grab April as she tumbled over to the group.

*Oh you did not just do that!* Oreo growled, probably for the first time in their life, at the Baron.

Sky and Violet slid next to Onix, both ready to protect. Oreo growled again, this time without words, and flung their weapon at the Boran.

The chain went stiff as it spun, just a few feet from the Borans head. Sky tilted his head.

A flash made Sky glance from the weapons to Oreo, who now had glowing marks covering their mask and the handle of the weapon.

Cackled laughter came from the ball at the end of the chain, fire and red hot embers froming.

Oreo tilled their head. The glowing marks on their mask faded slightly. *Oh yeah baby! magic weapon-*

The smaller turtle was suddenly yanked forward, making all of the siblings try to grab at her.

Oreo yelled, Sky couldn’t figure out if it was glee or tator, as they were pulled around the lab.

They flew around for a few seconds, no one moving or able to help.

The small turtle was inlay flung back down the ground, the small fire thing at the end of the weapon moving to try and hit the Baron.

The goat man jumped aside, letting the fire hit the ground.

Oroe tumbled over, finally landing on his butt and looking around with a raised look on her face. They shook himself out and looked at the others, head tilted.

“Oj that was amazing! How’d you know how to do that?” Sky leapt forward, trying to look at the now still orange ball and chain.

*I don't know dude! I just-* They grabbed their weapon from the floor and stood. *Was swinging this thing around and it-* Oreo began spinning the chain, grinning slightly.

*And it did that!* the weapon lit aflame again, taking the youngest for another joy ride. *oh boy.*

Sky snickered, attempting to convince himself that the littlest turtle would be fine

“Think all of your weapons are like-“ Violet was cut off as Onix hissed.

Onix began to shackle her arms as she charged at the Boran, the strange marks appeared on her bandana and sticks at the same time, a bright flash of red coming to life in her hands.

Onix growled, showing all her teeth. The Borans eyes went wide and a vine was slammed into her chest and sent her flying back.

Sky yelped, grabbing his sword and running forward. “Can’t wait to see what this baby can do!”

He ran to the Baron, shoving energy into his sword and bringing it up on the Baron, who raised their vine-covered arms to block his blow.

Sky chuckled nervously as the blade did little more than spark blue energy and cut the very surface of the purple muscle.

The Baron crossed his arms as Sky looked up at the sword. Blue ruins faded as the blade began to vibrate, shaking his hands slightly.

A blue glow came from below, making him look down.

A portal, an actual portal, was forming under his feet. How did he know it was a portal? Because he fell through it.

Then fell through it again as the other portal opened just above the first.

Then he fell again. And again, and again.

The hum of the energy was unfamiliar and messy, making him slightly nauseous as he picked up speed.

“GET ME OFF THIS RIDE!” Sky yelled as he fell, but he was unsure if his siblings could actually hear him.

Violet was talking, but he could only make out bits of sound and clips of words as the portals began to distort his hearing. ok, that or he was just moving too fast. The wind that roared past his ears was probably the cause.

“ -true warriors!” Sky was suddenly shot out of his portal trap by something warping around his body.

He grunted as he was slammed into a wall.

Sky blinked back to reality, cocking down the vomit that threatened to come up. He shook himself out, or at least tried to.

The same brown spiderweb things that had trapped April now trapped his entire body, say for his head. Oreos clicks were coming from somewhere to his left, along with Vis grumbling.

*How are we gonna save the dog thingy now?* April hissed to the words beside him, but he didn't get ro respond before Violet.

*Violets on it.* Vi clicked, probably attempting to scan the lab space if Sky knew his twin.

“Turtles!” The Barons footsteps made Sky finally focused his eyes, looking at the goat man that was slowly approaching them. “Why are you trying to stop our plans? We could all be in this together!”

“AHh- hEy-“ Vis voice cracked as they yelled. “Don’t know if this is part of your plan, Lab is gonna blow!”

Sky yelped and began wiggling around, trying to free himself. He practically flung himself forward and the webbing released their hold on him.

Sky scrambled up, just to be blown back onto his tail as bright pink-red fire began to balloon out from the green spire in the middle of the lab.

Rocks and metal began to cascade down, the pink fire beginning to shift to orange smoke. Something metal crashed to the ground, buzzing filling Sky ears as someone grabbed the back of his shell and pulled him back.

A popping sound made him glance back, the small dog-cat-thing from before having popped into existence on April's lap.

“Little guy! Can you do your thing and get us out of hEAR!” April yelped as she too was freed from the brown webs, courtesy of Onix apparently.

Sky began to hiss as the small thing popped them all out of existence for a breathless second.

The swirling blue energy shifted, his body becoming nothing but a small fire before his body suddenly returned to him.

They all popped back to the small platform they had landed on originally. By the time Sky steadied himself, Oreo was already halfway done carving the portal ruin.

Sky didn’t protest as Onix grabbed him again, bundling all of them through the portal.

Sky groaned as he landed, fully sprawled out as the rest of the siblings grumbled and hissed next to him.

*Dads portal dothing!* Oreo chirped as they wiggled out from under Sky, making him grumble and sit up.

“Oh no, so sad.” Sky grumbled and stood, stretching. “On the pulse side, we totally kicked that guy's butt!” he spun to face his siblings as a thought occurred to him. “We need a super cool hero name! Like,.. “

“-fucking man dogs.” Onix grumbled as she rubbed at her arm, probably not even paying attention but Sky went with it.

“we’re turtles not dogs, and only Vi is mad. How about.. Nina turtles teens..?” Sky wackily waved his arms ignoring the look he was getting from Onix and April.

He watched as Oreo and Vi shared a look. Vi shrugged and nodded. Ore grinned.

*mad dogs!* Oreo yelled, throwing their arms in the air as their tail wagging.

Vi and April nodded along. Onix tilted her head looking confused, but she made no comment.

“Fine, Mad Dogs then.” Sky grumbled. “I will think of something cooler though.”

*You wish.* Oreo grinned, scrambling up Onixs arm and shell when Sky lunged at her.

The play fight was cut off as a wave of green and purple bugs suddenly swarmed past them, the drove of thousands of wings drowning every sound possible out.

Sky stared at hte mob of bugs as it spread into the city. He really hoped that he wouldn’t have to be the one dealing with that later.

“And with that, we are leaving.” Onix sighed, picking up the portal carver from where it lay broken on the ground.

the siblings all nodded and let the oldest lead them home.

—

Oreo looked up from their hammock as someone knocked on their door. She trilled and Sky slowly crept into frame.

“Hey, Oj, uh, quick question,” Sky eased into the room looking anywhere but Oreo.

*What am I hiding from Vi?* Oreo turned back to their sketch pad, returning to their drawing.

“Nothing!” Sky chirped, then remained silent for a few seconds. “Uh, have you seen that photo we found earlier?”

Oreo looked over and gave his older brother his best impression on Violets deadpan look.

*No i don't have it. You took it back, remember?*

“Fuck.” Sky turned to leave. “Tell me if you see it?”

*Will do~* Oreo called as Sky darted out of the room, apparently looking for the old photo.

—

“What’s that?” Jones’s voice made Draxum flick an ear, far to intent on looking at what he held.

“A memory.” Draxum sighed, tracing one of the burned edges of the photo with zes clawed fingertips.

“Cryptic.” Jones snickered.

Draxum rolled his eyes and shoved the old polroid in his pocket, looking at the human girl that was currently draped over one of zes vines.

Jones gave him the finger and stood up, stretching. Draxum just sighed.

[laurmaus]

my rant (analysis????thing about that one scene in Our Fears Mcd thats been hidden in my notes app for like 2 years sorry it’s a little long

ok so it’s been a few days and i completely forgot most of what i was gonna say about the whole dante aphmau illusion bht the whole thing was so ?????????? liek the way garroth and ESPECIALLY laurence’s reactions to their “worst fear” and their worst fear itself is SOOO FUCKING WEIRD and out of character becayse that’s NOT what their worst fear woulld be ????)))))) starting with garroth because his whole personality as a guard is that he wants nothing but happiness and safety for aphmau and like we don’t know a lot about his personal life and struggles besides like zane and the whole dispwnment thing ok maybe we do but what i’m trying to say is that aphmau holding hands and Kissing a guy is Not his worst fucking fear………. the whole scene could’be been so much better if the illusion was aphmau Dead or like extremely hurt or fake dante threatening the two to hurt aphmau right in front of them or something like the whole shipping bait was so unnecessary I KNOW ITS NOT THAT DEEP BUT 😑😑😑 ok now for layrence he was done SOOOOO DIRTY like Extremely dirty from the way he reacted to the fact that his worst fear was aphmau just kissing dante too…….. starting with how he reacted it was INSANELY out of character for the time that it was written there was no build up to his personality suddenly switching to anger ridden like he’s never been seen like this before ?????? skimming through the moments hes had since he’s still generally New to the series he has NEVER lashed out like that??????? even when zane was insulting aphmau and he had to lie to make it seem like they were together he is Cool Calm and Collected it’s so weird so see him get so mad so quick like he was YELLINNGGGG thad was some unnecessarily. Possessive reaaction personally it makes more sense when i add the fact that my theeory is rhag he believed aphmau was under hypnosis or a spell or something but this is COMPLETELY a theory like it’s the only explanation to him acting out like that PLUS THE FACT THAT HE TRIED TO ATTACK DANTE ????????? he CONSIOUSLY WENT TO ATTACK HIM JUSF BC HE WAS GONNA KISS APHMAU I GET THAT HE THIUGHT SHE WAS IN DANGER UNDER THE PREMISE OF A SUPPOSED SPELL BUT OTHERWISE THAT MAKES NO FUCKING SENSE…. i KNOW for a fact aphmau ddint think that far through and just wanted a ooooh my guards are Jelous☺️☺️moment and its aggrivating bevauuse i KNOW that he should have been asking if she was ok instead of just arguing at a ghost i get that hees protective but😞 you can HEAR HIM SLASH HIM REPEADLY TOO LIKE I KNOW HE STABBED THAT SWOORD STRAIGHT THROUGH HIS BACK OR WRM OR SMEHTING UOOU HEAR IT GO IN EEUEUUEGH the cheap sound effect is So😦(samsung version) THIS PLUS HIS GENERAL AREGIVATED DEMEANOR ENCOURAGES THE IDEA THAT LAURENCE CARES MORE ABOUT GOING AFTER WAHTEVER IS THREATENING HIM INSTEAD OF FOCUSING ON GETTING WPHMAU AWAY (which is the OPPOSITE of what happened in the nether when saving the chicken sha man+ MAKING SURE SHES OK ANF FURTHER SUPPORTS GARROTHS SUSPICIONS i could say that the remnants from him being a shadow night like made him be way more violently impulsive but from the videos canonicity itself i know aphmau wasn’t thinking of that when writing this scene… personally i gues i see how this could be in character i just cannt sincerely undedstand how laurence’s morals and beliefs coincide with attempting to harm a possibly innocent man it’s so ARURRGGGGGDDD (sound effect sounds better in my head trust me☹️

ok now to the fear itself layrence is not even officially apart of the guard he hasn’t known aphmau for too long INCLUDING the Months(?) that he was trapped in the nether for and i KNOW they’re really close now and he apparently has a crush on her (WHICH WAS SUPER SUDDEN TOO AND ALSO OVERWRITES PREVIOUS LORE ABOUT HIM NOT LIKING SASHA AND THAT SHE WAS THE ONLY ONR THAT HE COULD BE “normal with” ((SUPER COOL IDEA BTW I REALLY LIKED THAT!!!!!!! THEN HE SUDDENLY ANNOUNCED THAT HE SNOULDNT HAVE LET SASHA GO ???????? i guess it could just be chslked up to him lying but what need was there for that….. the switch up is so random and like she’s suppose to be dead when he said that why not just admit you loved her i guess it could’ve been laurence still not accepting the fact that he actually loved her but i don’t think aph meant for his words to be so deep seeing how she writes mcd😭😭😭😭 if they geniuenly wanted to develop the idea that laurence has a crush on aphmau then wouldn’t it make more sense for him to say he had a crush on her and after she died it was difficult blah blah blah BONDING!!!!! and then at the end he couldve been like oh…. speaking to you right now reminds me of how we use to t- nevermind. IDK ITS CONRY BUT IT MAKES SO MICH MORE SENSE STORY WISE/// THE WHOLE THING SO FUCKING WEIRD AND ALL TO BUILD UP TO HIM HETTING A SPONANOUS CRUSH ON APHMAU FOR NO FUCKUNG REASON. HIS ENTIRE PERSONALOTY IS BASED ON A MAN THATS A CASANOVA BUT DOESNT ACTUALLY FEEL ANY ROMANTIC ATTRACTION TOWARDS THE WOMEN HE CHASES!!!!!!!!! laurence canonically struggles with expressing himself sincerely and ended up coping by making hismelf out to be a douchebaggy man who feels the need to flirt with everyone in order to feel validated by people that (in his mind) wouldn’t like him otherwise!!!! this chatavyer concept opened a HUGE DOOR for development which we actually started ti see when he opened up about his persona and started to interact with aphmau as less of a fake love interest but a friend!!!!!!!!!! but knowing that he DID indeed love sasha AND loves aphmau makes their development into closer friends void because it was a supposedly a crush the whole time i really don’t think it’s that serious i juus feel like SO MUCH WAS THROWN AWAY FOR A FORCED CRUSH THAT COULD HAVE BEEN BUILT UP MUCH BETTER THAN IT WAS!!!!!!!!!! i’m like skimming through old episodes right now and have rewatched that one section in Our Fears like Twenty times so far to analyze but watching laurence and aphmau banter is really silly and☹️☹️☹️it sucks how they cant just be funny friends with and loving eachother geniuennly with the /r jokes here annd there not because laurence has a not so secret crush on pahmau but because they’re wacky friends!!!!!!! bffs where one (Phmau helps the other (L heal and overcome his struggles !!!!!! their dynamic is so fun and lively annf laurence’s character development up to this point had been really satisfying minus the crush😞😞 everuhtingg is so susaauuauaaaaaaaihh jusf BE FRIENDS!!!!!!!!!! BE FRIENDS PLEASE but anyways he’s not even apart of liekt he pheonix drop guard i guess ????? at this time which makes his worst fear beign aphmau being kissed by another man so Pathetic he has cadenza and the nether people and him being a shadow guard and just so much more to worry about than aphmau same with garroth!!!!!!! i feel like there’s so much mroe that could’ve been explored if they had just considered making the illusion more Personal ?????? i was also thinking that making them both see a completely different illusion I DONG KNOW HIW TO EXPLAIN IT LIKE oooh smoke Sparkles Boom they’re in a different place and see the fear like it was done for aphmaus fear and dante’s fear!!!!!!!

going back to garroth too a few episodes ago he was talking about how he was afraid that something might happen with laurence now that’s he can see so maybe the illusion could have been laurence attacking aphmmau right in front of him and like his armor and weapons are gone when he goes to fight and hes like 😦😦 or replace laurence with zane or whatevver or he’s like married to his fiancé and aphmau is Gone what i’m saying is there was SO MUCH POTIENTIAL OOOH O AND LIKE LAURENNCES PERSONAL ILLUSIOKN COULD HAVE BEEN HIM HRUTING ALHMAU OR CADENZA AGAINNDT HIS WILL AS LIKR A SHADOW NIGHT!!!!!!!! OR IDK IMAGINNE “we should split up and look around for……” BOOM garroth looks to the left and lauurence is GONE….. it’s all like ?$)&!???!?? until he looks fowaard at the steeps and 💥💥😨😨😨 LAURENCE is STANDUNG there with APHMAU HURT ON THE SCENE!!!!!!!!!!! n he’s like laurenncz….??????? thannk irene you found hLAURNECE!!!!??!;???;??🤯🤯🤯 actually BETTER IDEA THIS IS THE BEBEST ONE ITS ONE ILLUSION NOT TWO SEPERATE ONES!!!!! RIGHT SO GARROTH IS JUST THHERE AND SEED LAURENCE AND HE LIKE SUDDENLY GAINS CONSIOUSNNES AND LIKE LOOKS DOWN BOOM SHADOW KNIGHT ARMMOR HES GOT A SWORD IN HIS HAND AND ITS COVVERE IN BLOOD!!!!!!!!!!! loook doen Aphmau There she’s Gone in that one pose you know the one i’m talking about and then he turnns around 2 c the garroth thags just in taht one standing emoji pose and he like seees the blood on his dacve and OOOH IT WOUKDVE BEEN SO COOL… i understand the limitations that come with making a roleplay series with npcs ghat have like limited movement obvsiosuly it wouldn’t be as elaborate as this but i see it in my Mind…… ONE LAST THING BEFORE I FORGET it not sure if this is a typo or intentional or just a little fact that wasnnt meant to be taken all that serious but when malachi was explaining his backstory he mentioned how he could show peoples “fears” not exclusively their “greatest fear” WHICH might excuse this entire scene (minus the inaccurate character portrayls ) and make most of what i said void but i still stand by all of it!!!!!!!!! i’m not taking this excuse from someone who mistyped one of their MOST IMPORTANT character’s name MULTIPLE TIMES to the point where a misspelling became their canon name😭😭😭😭 but overall i jsur feel ike this entire episode and concept of a “greatest fear” being watered down to throwing some wood into a Shipping Arguement Fire for the two most important characters right after aphmau could have been so much more!!!!!!! like i get that aphmau getting with someone else might just be one of garroth and laurence’s shared fear but that doesn’t excuse how laurence acted and ESPECIALLY how uncharacteristically their dialogue was after the whole debacle OH MY GOD I DIDNNNT EVEN MENTION JOW THEY ACTDD ATTERWORDS ok i’m getting tired of this Long ass essay but basically afterwords they kept questioning aphmau and dante on whether or not they kissed or whatevver and i feel so dumb right nowow this is unrelated but i’m just laying here on mymt bed Wirting this at 11:32 am instead of drawing or beingpeoduxtive or skemtjjngnevevrmind i joined a. Friend Call😊😊😊😊

ojay i left nothing interesting was happening but getting back on topic the fact that only laurence seemed to be concerned about aphmaus well beign when the whole illusion was over seems so weird especially since i would’ve expected garroth to say something about her aswell ?????? this is definitely nitpicky i just feel like i should mention the emphasis on dante and aphmau kissing instead of aphmaus wellbeing like they Shouldvve been douign…… like maybe ask about the next course of action or who dante is and what theyvve gone through or if theyre hurt wspecially laurenc before this episod he was more a less soft spoken i LOVVVE his Sassy Man persona just not before his actual character beliefs IDK HWO TO FEEL ABOUT THIS ANYMOORE yes i get theuure in shock i just feel like therees something off about this whole thing and i CANR EXPLAIN IT IN WOORDS I XANNT!!!!! i need teb notes all to be plugged into my mindndohmtmtgoodoss cddbdsdxxxcccccc cbc but yeah laurence is funny while he’s questioning them though so it’s ok and then afterwards when garroth is lik “especially the vision we saw now… that was, hard to take.” seems so out of place and weird wny doesn’t he question what happened or how they even found the child of wahetever the more the series goes on everythign seems to shift to focus more on the shipping aspects of things instead of going towards what the characters would realistically be worried about yeah yeah it’s her show i just wish that a little more was out into the dialogue during this bit to flesh them out more maybe i’m completely misinterpeting their characterrs because i’m Wacky but woudlnbg aph b like telling him everurjjng i DONNT JNWO!!!!!!!!!!!! overall i dont think the entire confrontation scene should have happened i thjnk they would have talked to aphmau eprsonally about what happenend instead of just Lamboding idk the word but that’s what i said in my head on dante and him kissing apjmau as guards that should not be their priority and i praay this is a one time thing otherwise scene was fine by itself i love❤️ Aph Mau team garmau forevver though (as of now(

no but srs i know this all sounds really corny and imm sure i look crazy right nowwhile you read this all out but this is liek directly from my brain to the paeer these are my Thoughts live not includdinng the ones i coudknnt add bc i was somehehrre else and then jsut Forgot about it!!!!!!!!!!! it’s crazy too becwysue this scene has always had such a special place in my heart (Gross) ever since i watched it when it first came out i ate this shit up!!!!!! annd now to look back and realize everything that was wrong with this part of the video and i know that there’s a BUNCH of more off moments like these but this one is just SO imporrynant to me i Sont know why and i can’t remmeber anymore because my okd notion of the video has been replacced eith me watchingn it from a few days ago but to seee myswlf continue to be interested by this straange but charming continuity annd story it’s just so important to me and was a HUGE part of my childhoood i would watch new videos from aphmau when they came out n eveerutnjng i remmeber hetting on the couch at like 9am to watch her new fnaf series videos i explicitly remember the one with the puppet jumpscare i was so fuckign scared😭😭😭😭 and i remmebr watching this one early in the morning too i thjnk idk jf this is me misremmebrjng and my brain being jumbled up bevauus that Happens sketimems and mixing up which videos i watched but i KNOW i would wake up early in the mirnirng to go to the livingn room and watch Aphmau i feel the need to critique it for what it is now and juust be Hinest with msuellf since i just saw so kuch wrong id dinnt know where i was going with this but i care for thier characters so much i just wnnat them to b real and Happy☹️☹️ love u guuys

[werezolft]

The Dead Boy Detectives (and crew), have been occupying my thoughts the past few weeks. I’ve watched the show on repeat, rewatched Sandman, actually started reading the Sandman graphic novels (currently on Seasons of Mist, the introduction of the Dead Boys), and I’ve started drawing the episodes in the style of old teen detective novels.

I started these before getting super into behind the scenes details. I went down a bit of a rabbit-hole last night, and was delighted to learn that show-runner Steve Yockey wanted the show to be reminiscent of The Hardy Boys, one of the main influences of these covers.

The accuracy of their depictions varies, I don’t think they always really look like themselves. But I had a lot of fun.

I hope to continue designing these for a bit while the obsession holds, and maybe I can properly bring in purples, Crystal’s hero color.

[Alt Text:

Image 1: A series of covers on a white background. From left to right, "The Case Of The Dandelion Shrine", "The Case Of Devlin House", "The Case Of The Dandelion Shrine" (alt cover), "The Case Of The Hungry Snake", and "The Case Of The Lighthouse Leapers".

Image 2: Three teenagers, Charles, Crystal and Edwin explore a blue green cave with a skull covered in dandelions on a center shrine. Charles holds a flashlight, Crystal is climbing in while her eyes have gone white during a psychic episode, and Edwin is playing lookout. At the top of the page in yellow italics is the text “Dead Boy Detectives” and below in off-white bold caps “THE CASE OF THE DANDELION SHRINE”.

Image 3: Edwin, Charles and Crystal peering around the corner of a yellow-green wooden hallway, looking at the silhouette of a man swinging an axe. They have varying worried expressions. At the top, in yellow italics is “Dead Boy Detectives” and in off-white bold caps “THE CASE OF DEVLIN HOUSE”.

Image 4: Crystal and Niko stare at each other across a green hallway. Niko has her left hand raised and is surrounded by glowing images, stars, hearts, moons, butterflies, rainbows, and sparkles. The cast a faint pink light. At the top in yellow italics is “Dead Boy Detectives”, and in off-white bold caps “THE CASE OF THE DANDELION SHRINE”.

Image 5: Charles and Edwin tied to chairs in a golden yellow room. Charles has an iron collar chained to his neck, and his wrists are bound. Edwin is in a white tank top, and his mouth is gagged with a clothe. On the wall is the shadow of the witch Esther, with her cane. In the corner is a large cabinet, Niko peers out of. On top of the cabinet is perched a crow, Monty. At the top, in yellow italics “Dead Boy Detectives” and in off-white bold caps “THE CASE OF THE HUNGRY SNAKE”.

Image 6: Edwin, Charles and Crystal stand on stairs overlooking the gray sea and red sky. A giant angler fish, Angie, is staring at them. In the corner, on top of the hill is a classic red and white striped lighthouse. At the top, in yellow italics “Dead Boy Detectives” and in off-white bold caps “THE CASE OF THE LIGHTHOUSE LEAPERS”.

Image 7: A series of book covers on a white background: “Alfred Hitchcock and the Three Investigators in The Secret of Skeleton Island”, “Nancy Drew Mystery Stories, The Ghost of Blackwood Hall”, “Nancy Drew, The Mystery at Lilac Inn”, “The Hardy Boys, While the Clock Ticked”, and “The Three Investigators in The Mystery of the Coughing Dragon”.

[redocity]

Evan Buckley x fiancée reader

Reader and Evan are recently engaged. Reader gets shot by the sniper instead of Eddie, Buck gets covered in her blood and attempts to save her (like the episode) and then just go from there please ❤️‍🩹. Please include lots of angst, sadness and happiness too 🫶

EMERGENCY ROOM - E.BUCKLEY

after a completely normal day on the job, you get shot seemingly out of nowhere. buck does not handle it well.

WARNINGS: spoilers for 04x13 and 04x14, established relationship, major character injury, blood, guns, buck is on the verge of a mental breakdown for most of it

buck x fiancée!reader II flangst Il 4.2k Il requests open!

a/n: i had so much fun writing the little fluffy bits at the beginning and the end i love them your honour

₊ ⊹ masterlist!!

“I know right?” You finally had a few minutes to fawn over your newest accessory now that you’d managed to secure Charlie away from his mother and get him into an ambulance, holding your left arm up in front of you and wiggling your fingers to show off the shiny rock on your ring finger towards Eddie. “Who would’ve thought he was so focused on the details?”

“Hey!” Buck nudges you as he walks past, shaking his head with a smile. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“People like you aren’t exactly known for their ‘detail orientation’ Buck,” Eddie laughs as he walks past him, pushing his head with the palm of his hand. “Good job on defying expectations,”

“Hey I am plenty detail oriented thank you,” gestures outwards exasperatedly, glancing at you for backup for his statement. You give him nothing more than a shrug of your shoulders.

“Shannon was the same when I bought her ring don’t worry,” Eddie pats Buck’s shoulder. “Went on this whole rant about how she never expected me to put so much thought into how it looked, I think it’s just a girl thing,”

“It’s not-” You scoff, putting a hand up in front of him in absolute astoundment. “I am trying to show my appreciation for the thought that went into making this ring fit my preferences, and you are making me feel disrespected,”

You point between the two boys in exaggerated disappointment, turning your face away from the two with a click of your tongue and a shake of your head.

“Oh come on baby seriously?” Evan sighs dramatically, crossing his arms over his chest and letting his head fall back until he’s facing the sky.

“You’ve hitched your wagon to a tank,” Eddie pats Buck’s shoulder once more, and the two share a short laugh.

“I’m gonna ride with Charlie to the hospital, you two good to get back to the station and tell Bobby?” Buck nods towards Eddie, giving him a small nudge towards the ambulance. “Yeah go ahead, we got it from here,”

“Thanks,” He returns Buck’s nod and then sends a finger salute in your direction. “See you later Mrs. Buckley, try not to kill him before the wedding,”

You laugh shortly at Eddie’s jest, shaking your head. “See you Eddie, give us a call if anything happens,”

“Will do!” He shoots the two of you a wave as he jogs towards the ambulance, climbing inside before the doors get shut behind him.

“Mrs Buckley,” Buck takes a few steps forward to grasp gently at your hips and pull you close to his chest, pressing a chaste kiss to your forehead. “I could get used to the sound of that,”

You give a soft hum as his lips press to your temple, turning your face upwards to kiss him properly. “I’d hope so,”

You pull out of his grasp with a soft laugh, pressing the keys to the paramedic car against Buck’s chest for him to take before actually beginning to walk towards the vehicle.

“We’ll have to get you a new turnout jacket too,” Buck follows behind you with a smile etched onto his face, eyes scanning over the last name printed on the back of your jacket. One you wouldn’t have for much longer.

“It’d be pretty confusing to have two Buckleys in the same station, the jacket might have to stay,” You turn around to face him once more with a smile of your own, arms crossed across your chest. “We’ll know the truth though,”

You shoot Buck a wink and he laughs, stopping a few feet in front of you and mirroring the way your arms are crossed with his own. “Are you saying that I can’t show off the fact that you’ll have my last name to every single stranger we meet on the job? Because I don’t know if that’s gonna fly with me,”

“I’m sure you’ll find an excuse to let them know, you’ve got a talent-” Your retort is halted by a sharp sound, then a searing pain in your right shoulder, and then you can feel yourself tumble to the floor as your legs give out underneath you under no will of your own.

Buck flinches as you do, a mix of shock from the noise and an instinctual reaction to the splatter that covers side of his face and stripes of his button down shirt.

Then it feels like the world just stops. Buck stands there with wide eyes as he watches you hit the pavement, in an awake state of sleep paralysis as a pool of blood begins to seep onto the pavement and stain the tarmac red underneath you.

He wanted to shout, to run, to move, Anything.

But he couldn’t so much as curl his hands into fists as he stood stationary in shock, eyes wide and locked onto where you’d crumpled into yourself on the concrete.

It took one of the other firefighters on the scene physically tackling him down to the ground for him to move, and even then his eyes never left yours, just barely open as you slip in an out of consciousness.

“Get down!” Mehta yelled across the group of vehicles as he pulled Buck behind one of the trucks, covering him with his own body as he tried to radio for help. “Shots fired. Shots fired a firefighter is down. I repeat, a firefighter is down!”

Buck can feel himself hyperventilate, his hearing going quiet until the sounds of the civilians nearby are drowned out and replaced with his own racing heartbeat. He watches as your hand crawls forward along the pavement in his direction as if silently trying to confirm to him that you were okay, but the far away look in your eyes wasn’t reassuring him at all.

Then your eyelids fluttered and you weren’t looking at him anymore, your hand left still in front of you with the stones on your finger glinting in the sunlight like a sick taunt of Buck’s anguish.

Shots continued to rain over the fire engines, and as Mehta moved from Buck to radio dispatch again he mustered all of the strength he physically could under the rush of adrenaline in his system to make a break for where you were laying, crawling underneath the bed of the truck as cover as he watched you roll from your side onto your back. “Come on baby! I’m coming I got you!”

You groan through the pain as you roll over, still conscious despite the agony raging through your shoulder and down the rest of your arm as you squint your eyes from the harsh sunlight.

Buck gets as far out as he can without exposing himself to the raining shots, grasping at your wrist as soon as he’s close enough and tugging until you’re dragged under the engine and onto the other side protected by the metal of the truck.

The friction sends another sharp wave of pain through your body, a sharp yell leaving your throat as you’re dragged across the concrete.

“Get her in the cabin! Quickly!” Mehta and a few other firefighters from station 133 rush to open and prep the back of the truck to cover you inside, and Buck pulls you into a fireman’s hold over his shoulder as quickly — and carefully — as he can to secure you safely.

Another shot is fired in the group’s direction as you’re pulled out of Buck’s hold and onto the seats, shattering the glass of the window and only further hastening the efforts of the firefighters as everyone clambers into the truck to rush away from the scene, leaving the paramedics car you’d driven over in erupted in flames on the side of the road.

“Okay, we got you, we got you you’re okay,” Buck lays you down across the back of the truck with help from one of the paradmedic’s from station 133 with panic written all over his face, continuing to speak reassurances to you in haste, mostly trying to reassure himself that you would be alright.

He rips open the top of your uniform shirt, paying no mind to the buttons that are pulled from their stitching in his haste to cover your gunshot wound in gauze and stop it from bleeding out. “We got you baby you’re okay, just- just stay with me okay?”

Your vision is blurry as you blink up at him, and you can vaguely hear Mehta calling for a trauma unit on standby as you attempt to lift your head slightly to clear your vision of Buck’s face. “…Are you hurt? There’s a lot of blood..”

Buck follows your eyes as they trail down the stains covering the front of his torso, and he shakes his head quickly as he brushes a stray strand of hair from your face. “No no no, I’m good baby, you just hang on for me okay?”

The hand that’s not stopping your wound from bleeding all over the place moves to cup the side of your face, thumb brushing over your cheek softly, a stark contrast to the way he practically barks at the driver of the truck to hurry up.

You barely manage to lift up your arm to cover his hand with your own over your cheek, shaking your head slightly under his palm. “You shouldn’t shout at people…”

“I know baby I’m sorry-” He takes a sharp breath in as he turns his attention back to focusing on you and not on the fact he felt like this drive was taking forever.

The paramedic in the back helps to stabilise your head as you start to slip out of consciousness again, and buck rubs his thumb over your cheekbone to get you to keep your eyes on his. “Hey, three minutes away, you’re so close, I just need you to hang-”

It wasn’t working very well.

The paramedic preps and secures an oxygen mask over your mouth as your eyes start to flutter closed.

“I just need you to hang on…please…”

This wasn’t what was supposed to happen.

He’d just asked you to marry him, you were supposed to be spending the evening celebrating.

You were supposed to get married and have children and grow old together.

Not get shot and bleed out in the back of a fire truck.

Buck jumps out of the vehicle the minute it stops in the hospital, practically screaming for the doctors to come and get you out.

“Through and through, upper torso,” Mehta explains your injury with just as much panic as Buck, although remains decidedly more collected as he barrels out of the front to watch you get pulled onto a gurney. “Large caliber-”

“We’ve got transfusion ready-” One of the nurses gives Mehta a nod before stopping as she takes in the last part of the explanation. “Did you say large caliber?”

“It was a sniper-”

“Pulse is weak! Trauma bay 2, quickly!” The medical team rush with you on the gurney towards the entrance of the hospital’s emergency unit with Buck watching on like everything was happening in slow motion. “Let’s set up for a thoracotomy-”

“Buckley, are you okay?” Mehta looks over at Buck with concern written all over his face as he examines the stains of your blood covering his face, torso, and hands, and Buck waves him off with nothing but a dismissive nod as an answer as his eyes remain locked on the door you disappear into, the the 133 firefighters, Mehta included, following after you inside.

He was not okay.

—

“Hey,” Eddie approached Buck carefully, but he still jumped at his voice anyhow. Eddie gave a short sigh through furrowed eyebrows, face contorting in concern. “She’s gonna be okay man, she’s strong, you know that don’t you?”

Eddie placed his hand slowly on Buck’s shoulder, immediately able to feel the trembling in his hands that traveled up his arms and into his back. “She was standing right in front of me I-”

“Hey.” Eddie swerved Buck to look at him, shaking his head. “This was not your fault. Nobody knows what happened. When’s going to be alright, you’ve just gotta put faith in her,”

Buck took a series of short, staggered breaths through his nose with a small nod, clasping his hands together to keep them from shaking. “I need to change- And have a shower-”

“You need to take a second to breathe,”

“You don’t get it I-” Buck exhales heavily, his eyes flickering as he turns to face Eddie. “I can still feel it under my fingernails and no matter how many times I wash my hands it won’t go away-”

“Okay slow down for a second,” Eddie raises his hand up to stop Buck from falling into a spiral. “You can’t go home alone like this, you’re not okay,”

“I don’t know what to do-”

“Alright, you’re coming back with me, come on,” Eddie pats Buck’s shoulder, guiding him through the parking lot towards his car.

—

A sniper who was specifically targeting firefighters, who would’ve thought.

Being sent back out into the field wearing bullet proof vests and swat protection didn’t feel any more secure than proceeding unprotected Buck thinks. If they were going to get shot with a bullet proof vest on then the sniper would just aim for somewhere not covered by the vest.

And it only proved to remind him that you didn’t have the protection you needed when you were shot. Why should he be surrounded by swat agents and covered in kevlar when you weren’t afforded the same luxury.

You ‘took one for the team’ as people would say. But you shouldn’t have had to. Why you?

It was such a selfish thought, but he would’ve rathered any other firefighter on the scene get shot as long as it wasn’t you. He’d’ve rathered get shot himself than it being you.

But apparently the universe was conspiring against him, making him watch and suffer from the sidelines as everything he cared about got ruined one by one.

Maybe that was why he was so reckless. Maybe that was why he climbed the crane with zero protection when he knew he could’ve been shot at from any of the windows of the surrounding skyscrapers and loose his own life whilst still debating how he would live if you lost yours.

He could see the look Bobby gave him as he was lowered down to the ground again, preparing himself for another scolding about him being ‘reckless’ once they got back to the station.

But it never came.

In fact, Bobby didn’t speak to him at all.

“Are you gonna say anything to me?”

Bobby puts down the chopping knife with a sigh, turning around to see Buck leant against the kitchenette sink. “I don’t know Buck, what would you like me to say?”

“Uh… I mean- I mean usually it’s- ‘what were you thinking?’ or ‘that was reckless’ or my… personal favourite ‘you could’ve been killed’.”

“It doesn’t seem like I need to have that conversation, you know it by heart already.” Bobby gestures exasperatedly before picking the knife back up to continue chopping the onion on the table in front of him. “And still, you went full Buck.”

“You say that like it’s a bad thing-” Buck approaches Bobby slowly, arms braced over his stomach in a self-soothing fashion.

Bobby sighs once more as Buck doesn’t drop the conversation, giving up his chopping to put his full attention on Buck. “You’ll never be the guy who thinks before he acts. And i’ve learned to come to terms with that,”

”In part because I realised I don’t have a choice, you’re never gonna change,” Bobby gestures outwards with his hands before clasping them together. “But also because… I know no matter what actions you take, no matter how dangerous or impulsive they may be, they come from your heart because you care.”

“Wow, uh, thank you,” Buck gives a soft chuckle as he claps his fist into his hand, clearly happy that he wasn’t getting a scolding this time around.

“Today was not that.” Bobby paused for a second before continuing. “You didn’t get caught up in some moment and rush in where angels fear to tread, you made a deliberate choice to make yourself a target.”

“Yeah.” Buck shrugs his shoulders exasperatedly. “I made myself a target because I wasn’t gonna let any of you guys take that risk because I cannot handle anyone else getting hurt right now.”

“And what about her? How do you think she would feel if she wakes up in the hospital to find out you got yourself killed because you weren’t being careful?”

Buck didn’t really have an answer to that question.

“You have responsibilities Buck. You have a responsibility to this team, you have a responsibility to your fiancée, and most importantly you have a responsibility to yourself.” Bobby shakes his head disappointedly, crossing his arms over his chest. “You cannot keep putting yourself in reckless situations Buckley because there are people around you that need you alive.”

Buck exhales heavily, biting the inside of his cheek. “Look I couldn’t protect her from getting shot, but today? I had an opportunity to protect the rest of you. So I did.”

Bobby sighs as he turns back to the half diced onion, finishing chopping it slowly. “We are a team, and we’re supposed to protect each other.”

There’s a small moment of silence before Bobby turns to look at Buck for a final time, a stern expression on his face, although lingering traces of gracefulness simmer into the wrinkles by his eyes. “Don’t do it again.”

—

The doctors said the surgery went well. It was probably one of the most relieving moments of his life.

He didn’t have time to visit you immediately though, the team had to go on a call out first.

And of course, because nothing was ever easy, the man who’d called 911 from the fire was also the sniper who was targeting firefighters.

Bobby ended up with a pistol shot to his abdomen, and after helping Athena get into the building dressed in firefighter gear to subdue the sniper the team headed straight to the hospital, now with two team members induced for bullet wounds instead of just one.

Bobby’s was much less severe than yours, but he was still put in for surgery, and Buck decided that it was a good time to visit you down the hall in the recovery unit.

You were still unconscious when he arrived, and it physically pained him to see you hooked up to so many machines as he took a seat at your bedside.

“Hey baby…” He took your limp hand in his own, fingers brushing over your knuckles and the ring still resting on your finger. “The doctors said that your surgery went well… So you should wake up soon…”

He lets out a small stunted exhale as he lifts your hand up to his mouth to press a kiss to your fingers. “I was so worried about you… God you scared me half to death-”

He continues to fiddle aimlessly with your fingers as he recounts the events of what happened to your sleeping self, how he risked his life, how Athena ran into a burning building to find Bobby and how he’d been bothering Eddie and Christopher for the last few days so he wouldn’t have to be on his own.

He told you how he’d moved the reservation of your engagement dinner so you wouldn’t have to miss it, laughing softly to himself at how excited you were to go to that specific resturaunt and try everything they had to offer.

He stayed after regular visitor hours were over, using his position as your fiancé to stay just a little while longer as a priority visitor, not wanting to miss the moment you woke up.

He ended up missing it anyway.

You woke up slowly, eyes fluttering open to the florescent lighting and the rhythmic beeping of the heart rate monitor.

The most prominent thing though, was an added weight on your left thigh, right near your stomach.

A mop of sandy blond hair is what meets your sight first, then your follow it down to his broad shoulders and his back, awkwardly bent forward in his chair to lay his weight on top of you. Then you noticed your hands caged together, his fingers intertwined with yours and held close to his chest.

The sight makes your heart melt a little, and you smile softly as you achily pull your right hand over to thread your fingers through his hair.

He stirs almost immediately, and you can feel his eyelashes brush against your thigh through the thin hospital bedsheets as he pushes himself upwards slowly until he’s supporting his own weight again.

“Hi baby…”

Buck lets out a short breath as your voice meets his ears, features flooded with relief. “Hi…”

You mirror the smile that breaks onto his face with your own, expression still laced with fatigue but also filled with your absolute love for him. He’d really stayed with you in the hospital for so long he’d fallen asleep.

“How’re you feeling?” Buck’s gaze flickers from your face to your bandaged right arm, and you give him a small shake of your head to dismiss his worries.

“I’m okay, takes more than puny bullet to put me out of commission,” You give him a soft wink and he gives you a little chuckles in return.

“You’re one tough lady…” he leans forward towards you until your foreheads brush against each other and your noses bump together. “I’m glad you’re okay…”

“You can’t get rid of me that easily,” You laugh softly, shaking your head against his and causing your noses to brush back and forth. “You put a ring on it remember?”

You pull back enough to flash your hand at him and show of your ring like he wasn’t the one who bought it for you.

He pulls your hand down into his lap without a care in the world for looking at the gemstone on your finger, his eyes not wavering from yours for even a second as he cups your face for a kiss, one filled with all the love and pain and anxiety and relief that he’d felt over the last few days.

“I love you so much-”

His lips leave you almost breathless, and you give his hand a soft squeeze. “I love you too Evan,”

He pulls you in for another kiss almost before you can even finish your sentence, and you laugh softly against his lips at the fervour. as you return his enthusiasm.

He shifts his hand down from your face closer to your neck as the kiss continues, and you groan against his mouth as it brushes a little too close to the brushing around your shoulder, pulling away with a hiss of pain.

“Ow ow ow-”

“Oh I’m so sorry-” Buck brings both his hands up away from you like he’s not exactly sure what to do with them, eyes wide in imminent panic of hurting you further.

The expression on his face sends you into a small for of giggles, and it’s enough to ease his panic back into calmness as you prove that he hadn’t actually hurt you.

“You always were a little rough with your hands,” You tilt your head against the pillow with an amused expression on your face, and it’s enough for him to crack a smile himself as you reach up your hand to pull his head back down towards yours.

Your lips connect more with his teeth than his own lips as you kiss him through his smile, and he laughs softly into your mouth at your statement. “You’ve never complained,”

“I never will complain,” You shake your head against his softly with a laugh of your own, one that’s cut off by his lips on yours once more.

All’s well that ends well he supposes.

[the-mighty-e]

Okay so... I was doing a md rewatch before ep 7, and I noticed something in ep 4 that I NEVER noticed before.

In the scene where V covers up Uzi, when she sits down, I always thought she was frowning. Cuz like in ep 3 she's starting to realize that worker drones don't actually care about death anymore or smth like that.

BUT NO

SHE'S ACTUALLY SMILING IN THE SECOND IMAGE IM GONNA BE SICK

And after noticing that I started thinking back on her behavior with Uzi and realized how much she actually cares about her.

Look at her smile. She's starting to care about the workers smmmm Im crying

Okay now for Vuzi. In ep 4 V initially saw her as just a "purple thing", later on as Cyn. But probably N saying "what did I say about antagonizing her?" got her thinking. What if she was really antagonizing her? That's why she covered her with the teacher, and that's why she smiled.

Now, episode 5 doesn't have much about them. We know that V remembers stuff from her time as a worker, so we know that she got once possessed by Cyn. She would be the only drone ever to understand what Uzi is going through. (another reason why she protected her in ep 4).

This reflects in ep 6. When Alice cuts Uzi's finger she can be seen flinching.

Idk about you, but it's kinda strange for V, the most insane out of the trio, to flinch when someone's finger got cut off.

This further proves just how much V started to care about Uzi. Same when Alice and Beau died and she was trying to escape the Sentinels. She immediately rushed to save Uzi, even if she just witnessed her getting fully possessed for 5 good seconds by Cyn

She didn't have to save her. She could've ran away, leaving Uzi to be killed by the next sentinel that passed by. But she didn't. She brought her back to N and Tessa, holding her tightly

And of course.

When they saw the Doll trap.

V immediately went to protect Uzi, getting extremely worried too when she was about to use her solver

This shows just how V started to like Uzi. She initially saw her as a thread, another Cyn, a thing and a monster. But after the sky therapy she probably saw herself in Uzi. Someone who's always been alone, someone who the solver can control however it wants. A poor possessed worked, confused and scared.

Moving to her sacrifice. The very first time V called Uzi by name instead of dumb nicknames. Immediately before she was smiling after N said that they still needed her. But she didn't believe him fully. They could do well without her, she probably thought. She had done nothing but cause troubles with Uzi. She wanted to make it right

Giving her full trust to Uzi, giving her life to Uzi. She was literally half possessed by Cyn but V still decided to trust her. And then she smiled at her.

That smile, immediately after the "I trust you" meant a lot coming from V. That smile was to assure Uzi that she doesn't see her as an enemy anymore.

Okay rant is over because I'm tearing up.

I love Vuzi so much I love tragic yuri 😭

[peachesofteal]

Dead Disco / Chapter 10

Dead Disco masterlist

Ghost/Soap/female reader 3.1k words - AO3 Warnings-tags: 18+ no smut but this fic contains mature themes. Relationship issues, anxiety, self loathing, crying. Angst. Brief mention of asshole ex. Eating related issues. Mention of prescription medication, mental illness and depressive/manic episodes. Pre established throuple. Darling is her/your own tag/warning. Excessive internal monologue. You held onto the hot pan too long, and now you’ve been burnt.

"Look at me." 

"I can't." You keep your eyes clenched tight, so tight it hurts, lungs burning inside your chest. 

"Yes you can, darling. Just open your eyes." Simon's voice is soft, an entreating melody, grit and gravel smoothed out with the gentleness of his words. You get lost in it, the soft murmuring, the easy request, and when you open your eyes, he's still right in front of you, thick palm on the back of your neck, Johnny by his side. "Good girl." 

"I'm sorry." You whisper, and Johnny's brows crease, his fingers brushing along your cheek. 

"Ye dinnae have anything to be sorry for, darling. Ye never do." 

"I didn't-" you gasp for a breath, and Johnny shifts, moving so that you're in front of him, sat between his legs, back against his chest. His hand holds yours, nestling above your breastbone. 

"Breathe with me. Ye can do it." 

"I didn't- I wanted to be better. Be different. I didn't want you to see." You try to explain, try to make sense of it for them. Simon's fingers intertwine with Johnny's, his other hand still firm on the back of your neck, your body cradled between them, in the space that once never existed, a space that now feels like it's been carved out just for you. Johnny pushes closer, holding you tight, and Simon leans forward, forehead touching yours, voice barely a murmur. 

"We've always seen you, darling." 

The floor is a fairly comfortable spot to lay.

It’s comfortable enough, you suppose, as you lay on your back with your eyes fixed on a spot along the ten-foot-high ceiling. Maybe you could paint the ceiling. With clouds. Or a night sky. That might be cool. 

Voices vibrate through the flat, locked door the only thing separating you from them, Johnny’s tone pitching with increasing anxiety, Simon’s cadence soothing, and calm.

He’s calling your name. Calling you darling. Calling you anything to try to get you to come to the door.

You’re overreacting. 

You’re a fool. 

You close your eyes. A night sky might be cool. You could do a lot with the stars, or maybe even the milky way. Get some greens and greys and cobalt in there. Make it look like a long exposure photo. And the moon, you could certainly paint the moon. You’d have to find a ladder tall enough though. And you’d probably need help. You haven’t painted from a ladder in years, not since you did that one mural for- 

“Darling.” It’s Simon. Again. And again, and again, again. Darling, darling, darling. “It’s getting late. Will you open the door?" You keep your eyes closed, but for a minute, your mind fractures, splitting in two, confusing emotions and thoughts bubbling up to the surface.

Don’t think about it. Don’t. 

“No.” You croak out in a whisper. It’s quiet, but he hears it. You know he does.

“Please. I need to know you’re alright, at least.”

You held onto the hot pan too long, and now you’ve been burnt. 

It’s late. The streets are probably mostly empty. You could run down them, if you wanted. You could take a train anywhere. You could take a plane, even, go on a vacation. Go somewhere nice. Go somewhere tropical, maybe get a cute rental, spend some time in the sun or by the oc- 

The thoughts are rapid fire. They spill over, trying to patch up the expanding wound in your heart. They grow and twist, convincing you it’s a good idea, the best idea, to just slip away for a little bit. To go somewhere you don't have feel this, where you don't have to know this as well as you do. 

Don’t think about it. Pack it up. Put it away. 

Johnny’s eyes haven’t left your face. His fingers stroke from the crown of your head and hairline to your temple, your cheek. He’s staring at you like you’re something precious, like you’re a piece of gold, something marvelous he’s never seen before.

“What is it?” You ask, half asleep, drowsy in the bed. You’re still wrapped in a post orgasm haze, cocooned in the soft and sweet of their attention, affection, and Johnny only smiles, leaning forward to press his lips to your forehead. 

“Ye’re so special to us. Ah love ye. Did ye know that?” You shrug, ducking your face away, pressing it into his shoulder to avoid his eyes. 

A wave of longing crashes over you. It swells in your heart until tears prick in your eyes, and you take a deep breath to steady yourself. 

It’s so much. So much more than you ever imagined. So much more than you ever thought you could have. 

“She doesn’t.” Simon says over your shoulder. His hand sits on your waist, the touch firm. Grounding. Like a tether to their world. Their love. You turn, nose pointing up towards the ceiling, looking at him through your peripheral, your fingers intertwined with Johnny’s, holding onto them both. Seeing them both. 

“Tell me again.” 

The TV in the living room is on.

You can hear it’s faint murmur, some movie playing on low volume, the guys undoubtedly sitting stiff on the couch, waiting for you to appear.

You stare at the dark, nearly blackened trees that you’ve painted onto canvas, long, broad brushstrokes taking up too much space, bark texturized to appear burnt, nearly dead, forest scourged by a disease or fire, you’re unsure.

“It starts to chafe us.” Us. Us, he said. Us. Him and Johnny. Right?

“It doesn’t seem fair.”

You’re unsure of everything right now. Unsure about how you should feel. Unsure about what’s happening inside your head.

“-sometimes I worry… about it being the right thing…” The more you think about it, the more you start to lose your grasp. Were those his exact words? Did he mean something else?

For the first time in a long time, you think about one of your ex's. You think about a person who made you feel so small, so much like a burden, a horrible, unwanted responsibility, all the time. You'll never have what regular people have, he said. No one will ever be able to put up with this fucking circus. No one will want this. 

Was he right? 

You should have gotten out. The sentiment replays over and over in between your ears, the awful, miserable doubt and fear and sadness picking away at you until you can feel yourself starting to compartmentalize it all, trying to sort it into neat little bins, trying to keep the weight that is sinking to the bottom of your soul from drowning you, trying to build a wall around your heart.

It’s not conscious. It’s like you’re not even in the driver’s seat anymore, not feeling the full effect of your emotions, not letting it in.

It’s how you felt, when you packed your bags the last time. How you felt when you checked into the hotel, like you were on autopilot. Buried beneath a mountain of feelings but enclosed in a glass cage, segregated from it all.

You should have gotten out. 

“I said I was listening.” 

“But I don’t want ye to listen. I want ye to talk, darling. I want ye to tell us how ye’re feeling. We can’t do this if ye’re not able to communicate.” Johnny’s voice is steady, but there’s a hint of anger behind it, a small flare just starting to light. It makes you angry, that he’s getting angry, and it churns in your stomach until you’re biting out a retort. 

“I communicate just fine!” 

“Do ye?” He snaps, exasperated, your head jolting backwards with wide eyes. “Because from where I’m standin’ it feels like ye’re trying to be stubborn on purpose. Like a child.” 

“A child? You’re calling ME a child?” The air in their apartment is suddenly paper thin, and you hold your breath as Johnny watches you with that same, unchanged, irritated expression. 

“Alright. This is over. We’re taking a break from this conversation.” Simon tells you both, fingers sliding over your shoulder, the touch meant to comfort, reassure, but you jerk away. 

You eye your purse, your keys on the counter. 

“I’m just gonna go home.” 

“No.” He rebukes, and Johnny pales. 

“No, darling. Ye just got here, and we missed ye so, so much. I’m sorry, I dinnae mean-” Johnny pleads, crestfallen, and it makes you feel worse. Like you’re failing him. Like you’re failing at this. Like you’re not good enough for it, for them. “Please?” He adds, and you wilt, silence falling over the three of you again, awkward and wrong. 

“It’s alright.” Simon says. “If you want to go. I’ll take you home.” 

“I can get home on my own.” You try not look at him, finding mundane details in the floor, the sink to stare at instead of their faces, resisting eye contact until Simon steps directly back into your line of sight. 

“I’ll take you.” He steps closer, and like there is a magnet pulling you into his orbit, you respond, tilting your face backwards, letting him see everything. The tears. The anger and sadness. The confusion. He’s intentional with his movements, letting you anticipate everything, the movement of his hand, the bend of his body as his lips come down to press against your forehead. “Tomorrow, alright?” He asks and tells with the words, seeking permission, giving command. Tomorrow, you’ll talk. Tomorrow, you’ll get it sorted. Tomorrow, you and Johnny will apologize. And you’ll try again. Like you always do. 

You nod, because the promise of tomorrow, the assurance that this hasn’t all come crashing down, is the only way any of you will be able to sleep tonight. 

“Tomorrow.”

They both straighten on the couch when the door clicks open.

“Hey.” Johnny says softly, hopefully, and Simon says nothing, just watches you like you’re a wounded animal that might try to flee at any moment. On edge. Vigilant.

Your mind turns, but nothing comes out of your mouth. No response. No acknowledgement. Just empty silence that feels like a thousand pounds, all laying on top of the three of you. Suffocating you. Killing you.

You beeline for the bedroom.

Running away. You’re running away. Are you really going to run away? 

The memory of the hotel haunts you, the awful, empty pit in your stomach that could have swallowed you whole, the dark curtains and dark room enveloping you in a never-ending spiral.

All you wanted was to be found. All you wanted was to be home, with them.

All you wanted was your home, the one you built, made, suffered for, with them. The one that you carved out inside your own bones to hold space for two others, not just one. The home that you completely changed your life for, the love that you believed would see you through it all. 

The love that was always them first. The love that you barged in on, knocked walls down, forced yourself inside of. The love that they held for one another, before they ever held it for you. 

Your head feels like it's underwater. 

Did you make a mistake? Should you have sent them away that time? Should you have fought yourself harder?

The bed calls to you. It begs you to lay down in it, to burrow yourself beneath it's soft sheets, curl up on top of it's ridiculous mattress. Get lost in it. Be found in it. Let your boys curl themselves around you in it, let them kiss you softly and make you promises about how much they love you, or how they understand the way you feel.

If you close your eyes, you can almost see the future. Minutes would pass before Johnny crept inside the door, scoping it out. Doing the recon. Looking for you. His heart would soar when he saw you in the bed, his fears allayed, and he'd hold you so tight you'd think you were suffocating. 

If you were lucky, Simon would come and turn your brain off. Johnny would pass you to him and he'd bring your deepest insecurities, your worries to light, dragging them out to be exorcised and vanquished, by the only men capable of doing so. 

Is that what you want? 

Should you have gotten out? 

“There she is.” Johnny coos above you, warm palm cradling your cheek. You blink, fog encasing your mind struggling to clear, and you push yourself up onto your elbows. 

“What-“

“Happened?” Simon finishes from where he kneels next to the couch, concerned eyes trained on yours, not missing a beat. 

You blink. What did happen? Did- 

“When was the last time ye ate something, darling?” Johnny asks, not unkindly, palm at your back to relieve the pressure from your elbows, moving you into a sitting position so he can take the spot on the couch behind you, effectively wrapping you up in his arms as Simon settles on the other side. 

Shame curdles your stomach, hot embarrassment flaring in your veins. You avoid peering over Simon’s shoulder at the disarray of your kitchen, wincing when you realize he’s sitting on a pile of your dirty clothes. 

“I had breakfast.” You whisper, but Simon shakes his head. 

“When?”

“Yesterday.” You try to adjust, to sit more upright, but the sudden movement has your head spinning, and your palm covers your eyes, little groan in your throat. 

“Easy.” Johnny soothes. Your water bottle is in his hand, and he unscrews the lid for you, lifting it to your lips. “Slow sips, darling. Not too much.” 

It’s easier this way, you realize. Easier to do what’s being asked of you, easier to listen than to think. After a few sips, Johnny pulls the bottle away, and wide fingers stroke your cheek. 

“This is what you were talking about. A few weeks ago.” Simon murmurs, concentrating all his focus, all his attention, on you, fingers still caressing your skin gently. Lovingly. 

“I didn’t mean for it to get so bad this time. I… usually have a better handle on myself.” You try to lie, but Simon cocks his head. 

“Do you?” His fingers hold up the scrap of paper, the one with your note to yourself scrawled across it. 

‘You HAVE to, or you’ll regret it.’ 

You bite your lip, but Simon’s thumb presses into it, rolling it out from beneath your teeth, as Johnny rubs your arm, lips soft against your temple. 

“I’m going to take you home. To ours.” Simon tells you slowly, each word deliberate “Johnny is going to clean up your apartment and pack you a few things for the rest of the week.” When you don’t answer, brain slow to catch up, Johnny murmurs in your hair. 

“You have to agree, darling.” Simon watches, silent for a moment before he answers the unspoken question, still cradling your face with one hand. 

“You can trust us.” 

“Where are ye going?” Johnny asks when you appear from the bedroom, hesitant steps keeping him far enough from your body, desperation written all over his face.

“Out.” Your answer is short, sufficient. It feels like it’s coming from another person. You still think you might be underwater.

“Out? No… we need to talk and-“

“I don’t want to talk. To either of you.”

“Darling. Stop.” Simon tries to cut you off, but you turn sharply, away from them both, backpack swinging on your back.

“Ye canae run away from this, from us.” Johnny pleads. “We need to talk about it. Communicate. Like we promised.”

“Like we promised?” You hiss, sizzle of anger breaking through the ice that’s frozen in your veins. “The promise that we made to always tell each other how we’re feeling, the one that he can’t honor?” You jerk your thumb towards Simon, who tries to take a step towards you, only for you to retreat. “Don’t corner me!” you snap, and against your attempt at control, your voice breaks, sob welling in your chest.

Don’t think about it. 

Don’t think about it. 

“It’s alright.” His hands are palms out, cautious. It’s supposed to make him look like he’s not a threat, make him seem harmless. But he’s not harmless. This gaping hole in your heart says so. “We don’t want you to leave.” He implores. “Please. I- let me explain.”

“There’s no need. Everything is pretty clear.”

“No, it’s not.” Johnny argues. “Just, let Simon at least tell-“

“Tell me what? Tell me how it’s not fair? Does it chafe you too, Johnny? You also thinking what’s the right thing? Because it’s an us thing, right? You and him. It’s an us and me. It’s the us that I suffer for.” Your voice crests, and Johnny flinches.

“I made a mistake.” Simon whispers. “Don’t let my stupidity make you question your place in this relationship. We love you, darling. I love you.” Tears burn at the back of your eyes, and you feel the horror of the truth, the confusion about your love for them, their love for you, searing together into a snarled mess.

“If I left you, the both of you, at the end of the day, you’d still have each other. You’d still be together, and I would have nothing!”

“That’s not true. We canae exist without ye.” Johnny sounds broken, hopeless, but you blow by it, dancing around Simon to pull your prescription bottles from the kitchen cabinet by the sink.

“If I died tomorrow-“

“Do not say that.” Simon cuts you off. “Don’t ever say that.” His knuckles are white at the edge of the countertop, expression stricken, and Johnny looks horrified. They both watch you like they’re afraid of what you might say next, what you might do, and nausea pools saliva on the back of your tongue.

Don’t think about it. 

You close your eyes, and search for that underwater feeling. That untouchable feeling, the boxes being packed away in your mind, and try to cling to it, try to shut up the incessant stream of doubt and loathing and everything going wrong inside your head.

They don’t need you. They have each other. 

You chafe them.

Don’t think about it.

“I need…” You trail off, trying to take a deep breath. Trying to organize your thoughts. Trying to hear yourself through the noise of everything else, through the searing pain that’s ripping through your heart.

“It’s alright, darling.” Simon murmurs, encouraging you. “Tell us what you need. Whatever it is.” Johnny’s face has shifted from despondent to hopeful, eyes wide and locked onto yours, while Simon waits, his normal steadfast and patient demeanor nowhere to be found, instead he’s more anxious, more nervous than you’ve ever seen.

You close your eyes again. Your voice shakes when you finally speak.

“I need a break.”

[lumineary-arts]

A lot of people are asking how Cabin Fever would go down, so like for the Promening I wrote down a lil summary. Its basically the same beats, so don't expect huge differences to the original.

Also, I never clarify which camper swaps with who, I'll probably give that some thought sometime later.

Since this is happening after the events of the Promening, N made a plan with Uzi and Thad to investigate the camp in order to find more clues about where his little sister Cyn disappeared off to, as well as what the meaning of the collars were.

And, like in the original, Uzi and Thad become the new camp counsellors! Thad's pretty intimidating, so Uzi's the one who tries to lead the class forward. V and J, beloved and popular among their peers, are the only ones who actually convince the class to trust them. N's... pretty much ignored. He's usually the type to be able to brush off this kinda thing with a nervous laugh, but something about the way they shower Uzi with so much flirty attention makes him feel uneasy...

The knowledge that his classmates and his only friends were having tons of fun because he wasn't there just overwhelms and overheats his senses, causing his solver to break a few windows while he investigates the abandoned cabins and looks for Cyn. It doesn't help that Thad later comes in to rub salt in the wound, hinting that Uzi would ditch him at the drop of a hat if given the chance. This ultimately ends up spiralling into N's solver slowly showing its horrific side when he later comes back to tell Uzi about what he's discovered in the cabins.

And suddenly, Thad isn't laughing anymore. He remembers Doll from the mansion, he knows exactly what that solver is, and he needs N dead as soon as possible. This causes Thad and Uzi to start fighting for the first time, with her defending N's actions to her core, even running off to find him. Poor Thad :(

We all know what happens in this episode. N's always been a sweetheart and the friendliest person imaginable, even in this AU. But from the grief that was losing his little sister, the dejection he felt every day from his own class, and the fear that Uzi would leave him at any point solidified his transformation. What's horrifying about this form is that, while he's not in total control of his actions, it's not like it doesn't stem from his feelings at least a little. He's friendly and forgiving, but he still feels resentment and hurt towards the classmates that constantly belittle and mock him every day. Especially J, who luckily survives just because Thad protects her. And Thad, the one who most mocked N for being scrawny and weak, suddenly can't win in a fight against the little dude, only being saved once Uzi swoops in and throws N up into the sky.

N's naturally a pacifist, but this is his first time actually harming and murdering other people, so he's even more visibly ashamed than Uzi is in the original episode. He struggles to even open up to Uzi while they have their sky therapy talk, instantly feeling the horror and guilt once he snapped out of it. They talk things out, each confessing that they felt scared without each other and that they needed each other to feel safe and complete. While he never ends up forgiving himself completely, Uzi stops him from spiralling at the revelation of his own actions.

Thad, of course, ends up covering for N in the final bus scene, pinning the blame on himself by "bragging" about the drones he killed at camp. In reality though, he's scared for AND of N, but he shows, in a way, that he cares.

[amnesique]

do you write smut? if you do, can you write the scene in episode 1(i think?) where belly tells conrad to quit smoking and he says "what will you give me if i do" but that it leads to smut?

and can you do it with x reader instead of belly if possible please, thank you so much :)

what'll you give me if i do? — conrad fisher

warnings: SMUT (18+, MINORS DNI!), dirty talk, fingering, protected sex, p in v.

there was a wave of fog that enveloped every girl that stood around conrad fisher, as if it was encouraging them to pluck up the courage to pass through it to try to understand what was happening to the boy, besides the silence that surrounded him wherever he was. and yet, none of them seemed to succeed. at least, not yet.

the fisher boy was sitting in the back yard, by the pool, with his feet in the water as he was lazily smoking a cigarette. something you saw him doing more and more that summer, even though that summer had just started.

being belly's cousin, the daughter of his mother's best friend, it wasn't out of the ordinary for you to spend the summer with them, although the fact that you jumped into the pool, as if was out of nowhere, caught him a little off guard.

he was staring fixedly with a cigarette in hand at the place where you had plunged into the water.

“sorry,” you murmured to him after getting out of the water, not before flipping your already damp hair back. "i haven't seen you here," you added, trying to adjust your vision, because of the water on your face.

"no problem," he replied dryly, taking another drag from his cigarette.

typical conrad fisher, you thought, as you suddenly just then noticed the fact that he was smoking, after your gaze had adjusted enough.

"since when do you smoke?” you asked him in a tone that was meant to be accusing, but it only ended up making conrad smile at the corner of his mouth, immediately after blowing the cigarette steam into the dark night sky.

"don't tell me you care," he said, running his tongue across the front of his teeth, accentuating his smile from before.

he took another drag from his cigarette, his gaze locked on you as he did so.

you didn't know what to answer.

you didn't care, did you?

but your mouth got you ahead of you and you found yourself telling him "i think you should quit."

"what'll you give me if i do?"

you didn't know what had made you stop breathing in the first place, his words or the way he let the smoke leave as he continued to have a smile on his face, this time actually looking more of a grin than a smile.

conrad knew that smoking can be attractive to certain girls, even for you —despite the fact that you had just suggested that he quit—, and he took full advantage of it.

acting on the spur of the moment, you swam the remaining distance between you and rose to the surface in just a few seconds. you put your arms on either side of his body, leaning on the edge of the pool for balance, and you suddenly connected your lips with his while he put out the cigarette.

he quickly took the opportunity to wrap his free arm around your waist to help keep you afloat, as he rushed to deepen the kiss the moment your lips parted slightly over his when you felt his touch on your wet skin, ignoring the presence of your bathing suit.

he was so good at kissing you that you were so damn grateful for his arm holding you. because if it hadn't been there, then you would surely have drowned already if you had to support yourself alone.

a faint sound left your lips as, using his hand around your waist, he pulled you all the way over his lap, lifting you out of the pool. a sound that he would've liked to hear endlessly.

only, being the wrong people at the wrong time, jeremiah and steven showed up outside the house, making a lot of noise before they noticed you, and you immediately pulled away from conrad, leaving him yearning for having you again in his lap.

you were preoccupied with looking at each other, both mentally cursing the two of them —conrad more than you—, that you didn't even realize what they were talking about. not until steven addressed conrad specifically, "come on, man, we're leaving," he said with excitement visible all over his face and conrad struggled to look away from you to look at him. "you ready?"

you weren't aware of what it was about, but it didn't matter either, because conrad was quick to turn him down. "actually, change of plan, man, i can't come tonight."

both steven and jeremiah looked at him confused.

steven raised an eyebrow. "how? why?" he asked.

conrad fisher was not a man of many words, so he just shrugged and said, "something else came up."

jeremiah and steven exchanged glances, not knowing whether to believe him or not, but neither of them would've thought that the thing that came up was actually someone and you were right in front of them. eventually they gave up and left the backyard, leaving you alone with conrad again and with a tension between you which could not be overlooked, the desire still being on both sides.

"soo," you lengthened the letter because you didn't know what to say, "good night, i think," you added and you wanted to leave, but he grabbed your hand and when you looked at him, you couldn't take your eyes off his gaze and the way you could see he was longing for you.

"good night?" he used a tone to tease you and a grin appeared at the corner of his mouth. "it would be a good night if you continued what you started."

"what?"

your cheeks flushed and you stared at him like a deer in the headlights.

oh, your naivety.

it attracted him even more that even though you were perfectly aware of what you had started, you were unaware of the effect you were having on him.

he pulled your hand so that your legs were around his lap again, placing his hands on your back, lightly forming circles on it with his long fingers, and his lips on your neck. when you felt his lips on your neck, you involuntarily arched your back and moved against his growing erection, having him gasping to try and keep his control.

"don't move," he warned you, his mouth now close to your ear as he lowered his hands to your waist to stop you.

but the area where you needed him was starting to throb and yearn for his touch, forgetting about the layers of clothing that would separate you both from making skin to skin contact.

you tried to tell him that, but instead you made a soft sound, almost like a whimper, and he couldn't resist the temptation anymore and pressed his lips to yours, kissing them as if hungrily as if he had been waiting for this moment for a long time.

and so it was.

only he knew how often it became painful to see you in a short dress or a bathing suit, making him think about how you would look without any clothing item.

during the kiss, you started to rub against him again taking advantage of his carelessness and when your pulsing core made contact with his length, your lips parted and you sent a soft moan into his mouth, right before his tongue entered your mouth and entwined with yours in a dance of desire.

you continued the kiss for several seconds, conrad completely dominating you while you tried to keep up with him.

you broke the kiss, leaning back just as you could breath and whispered under heavy breath, "we shouldn't be doing this."

"why?" conrad asked you, breathing just as hard, running his finger over your bottom lip.

"anyone can see us here," you said and you weren't phased that you saw another grin appear on his face.

"let that be our last problem,” he replied and lifted you off of him, taking you over his shoulder and covering your bottom with his hand as he slipped through the back door to go up to his room, without you two bumping into the belly or even worse, into one of the mothers.

you reached his room and he put you down, with your back to the door, as soon as he made sure he locked it, and the way he looked at you made your thighs squeeze around nothing.

"i think you should ditch the swimsuit, love, or you'll catch a cold."

you swallowed hard, looking at him as he measured you from head to toe, and you couldn't go on even though you wanted it more than anything.

he noticed your avoidance and moved closer to you, playing with the strap of your swimsuit, his breath blowing lightly heat against your skin. he couldn't be more wrong than that. there was no way you could catch a cold, even though your bathing suit was indeed still wet, when your whole body was on fire for him.

"do you want me to help you?" he whispered, brushing your hair aside with his free hand so he could see your neck.

with your breath caught in your throat, you nodded your approval and his hand lifted your chin with two fingers, bringing your lips to his.

"with words, love."

you snapped out of your trance, muttering an "yes", just to urge him on.

his hands slowly went down one strap at a time, taking his sweet time to look at your chest as it was right under his nose, and he couldn't control himself and grabbed both of your breasts with his hands, gently massaging them, drawing a weak moan from you. he ran his tongue over one of them, continuing to caress the other as he removed the entire bathing suit from your body and moved down, wanting to run his mouth over your body, but you stopped him, instinctively grabbing him by the hair to get his attention, and he could've sworn he was almost ready to finish in his pants, right then and there.

"aren't your clothes also wet after the moment before?" you asked, and he gave you a knowing smile.

he pulled away from you, the smile still playing on his lips, and he removed one item of clothing one at a time, earning a sigh from you each time. you liked what you saw.

he was only in his boxers and started to come towards you, but you put your hand on his chest, stopping him. “not fair,” you said and looked at him seriously, so he chuckled in a low tone and took them off as well, leaving you both completely naked in the moonlight that filtered through the blinds of the bedroom window.

plucking up some courage and trying not to think about how big he was, you pulled his neck towards you and you kissed him, as he pushed you back towards the bed until you fell on it. he leaned over you, continuing the kiss and helping you get comfortable between his pillows.

"are you sure?" he asked and you agreed. he moved his hand down between you and when he reached your opening he felt how wet you were and he smirked against your lips. "all this for me?" he asked teasing you but inserted a finger of his inside you, making you open your mouth slightly. "shh, love," he cooed, and kissed you briefly, earning your moans as he inserted another finger and and he curled them just right so he can touch the place that made you lose yourself under him. "we wouldn't want anyone to hear us, would we?" he continued and asked you between short kisses,

you wanted to tell him you were close, your breathing becoming alert as you followed your release. but he already knew that by the way you squeezed his fingers inside you, so he suddenly withdrew, at which point you whimpered and felt your body begin to calm down, though you still felt the desire pulsing at your core.

"i won't let you finish until you finish when i'm inside you," he assured you and reached to grab a condom from the bedside drawer and open it with his teeth as he roll it on.

you moaned in anticipation, involuntarily clenching your thighs, but he pulled them apart, making a sound of disapproval and positioning himself at your entrance. "i hope you haven't changed your mind because i don't think i can back down now,” he said, tucking a strand of hair, that sticks to your face because of the moisture on it, behind your ear as he watched you while standing on his elbows at the either side of your body. and when he met your gaze, you placed your hands on his cheeks, kissing him and pulling him back down over you, giving him the answer.

he put it inside you, waiting a bit until you squeezed his hand to continue as you both moaned at the contact, and he picked up the speed.

"you feel so fucking good," he said and your moans had become his new favorite sound, he could have listened to you all day and all evening and he would not have had enough.

he was nearing his finish, and he couldn't resist anymore, so his movements became sloppier and faster, as he lowered his hand to massage your clit in small circles to help you both finish at the same time.

the only sounds in the room were your hurried, strangled breaths, and the sounds of wetness as his body pounded inside you, until the released washed up over you both, and he fell on your chest.

"it was amazing. worth quiting smoking for," he said unexpectedly from the euphoric high he was feeling, —more euphoric than the feeling he got from smoking—, and you giggled under him, hiding your face with a hand as the other one hugged his body softly.

[queerfables]

A dash of nutmeg...

Look I feel a bit like I'm throwing soup at a dart board and calling it analysis, but I have some thoughts about Aziraphale's magic words in episode 4, and it's going to kill me if I don't share.

The thing is, these words have been nagging at me since I heard them. They sounded familiar, and I've been trying to figure out why. Today, it finally clicked.

Banana. Fish. Gorilla.

Those initial three words are all key words from Crowley and Aziraphale's drunken conversation about Armageddon. It's right at the start of things, when Crowley convinces Aziraphale to help him stop the world from ending.

We'll start with the fish, because they come up first.

"The point I'm trying to make," [Crowley] said, brightening, "is the dolphins. That's my point." "Kind of fish," said Aziraphale.

Their entire exchange here is hilarious and iconic but I'll try to keep this to the point. After some banter about the difference between fish and mammals, Crowley argues that dolphins don't deserve to be caught in the crossfire when the kraken rises and the seas boil. Which conveniently brings us to:

"Same with gorillas. Whoops, they say, sky gone all red, stars crashing to ground, what they putting in the bananas these days?"

Banana. Fish. Gorilla. It got me curious, so I searched for other places these words show up in the book. There's nothing I think is really significant: a couple of things are described as banana flavoured, fish show up in rains that herald the impending doomsday, gorillas aren't ever mentioned again. If I'm on the right track at all, I think this part is here to signpost a connection between this string of words from the show and the specific moments in the book.

If that's true, it must be pointing to something. What's left? Shoe lace and nutmeg.

Shoe lace.

The word "shoelace" isn't actually in Good Omens. Neither is "shoe lace" with a space in between. There's a couple of unremarkable descriptions involving shoes, and one miraculously conjured lace handkerchief, and then - and then. Right at the very end of the story, we have Adam, grounded by his parents, being described as "a scruffy Napoleon with his laces trailing, exiled to a rose-trellissed Elba". It's tenuous. I could dismiss that as nothing. Except Adam's laces show up again, and it's the very last passage of the book.

If you want to imagine the future, imagine a boy and his dog and his friends. And a summer that never ends. And if you want to imagine the future, imagine a boot . . . no, imagine a sneaker, laces trailing, kicking a pebble; imagine a stick, to poke at interesting things, and throw for a dog that may or may not decide to retrieve it; imagine a tuneless whistle, pounding some luckless popular song into insensibility; imagine a figure, half angel, half devil, all human . . . Slouching hopefully towards Tadfield . . . . . . forever.

I'm not ready to say much about what I think the significance of this passage might be. But an allusion to the book's ending does feel significant, doesn't it?

The one thing I will say, for people who may not know, is that this passage is riffing on a line from Orwell's 1984. The line it's playing on is a lot darker: "If you want a picture of the future, imagine a boot stamping on a human face – for ever." I think it's probably relevant that this is referencing a book about a totalitarian regime. I also think it's probably relevant that it's taking that reference and twisting it into something much sweeter, more optimistic and empowered.

I'm still thinking through all the connections and implications, though.

Nutmeg.

And that brings us to "nutmeg". I have to be honest, I wasn't hopeful. I didn't remember any references to it and if I were betting, I wouldn't have put money on it appearing in the book at all. But the word does show up, and it shows up exactly once. Crowley is reminiscing about a cocktail he had once, made out of fermented date-palms. It's part of a conversation with Aziraphale, where they discuss losing the Antichrist. And here's the really interesting part:

"You said it was him!" moaned Aziraphale, abstractedly picking the final lump of cream-cake from his lapel. He licked his fingers clean. "It was him," said Crowley. "I mean, I should know, shouldn't I?" "Then someone else must be interfering." "There isn't anyone else! There's just us, right? Good and Evil. One side or the other." He thumped the steering wheel. "You'll be amazed at the kind of things they can do to you, down there," he said. "I imagine they're very similar to the sort of things they can do to one up there," said Aziraphale. "Come off it. Your lot get ineffable mercy," said Crowley sourly. "Yes? Did you ever visit Gomorrah?" "Sure," said the demon. "There was this great little tavern where you could get these terrific fermented date-palm cocktails with nutmeg and crushed lemongrass-" "I meant afterwards." "Oh."

Book Aziraphale differs from his characterisation in the show in a few ways, and this is the big one. In the book, Aziraphale is much more cynical about his own side, and much more aware of heaven's flaws. Here, he's convincing Crowley that the threat heaven poses is just as serious as any threat from hell.

If I'm right about any of this, if these nonsense words mean anything at all, I think they are saying that heaven and hell are two sides of the same very nasty coin, and more to the point, that maybe Aziraphale is more aware of it than he seems.

I need to think about this more, still. I'm not sure if I really think this connection is something, and if it is, I'm still figuring out what sorts of conclusions we might draw from it. But if the script is trying to point us to these three sections of the book, maybe there's a deeper analysis to be had here.

I do think it's interesting that the last two words each only show up in one section of the book. It's not like I'm skipping around trying to decide which passage involving shoe laces is most relevant - it shows up twice, only in the last few pages of the book and only in relation to Adam (and in particular, humanising Adam. He's Napoleon in exile, but he's a kid with trailing laces. His future isn't a boot stamping on a human face, it's a sneaker with those same trailing laces - and a stick that his dog can choose whether or not to chase).

I could talk myself in circles on this point, so I guess I've got to open it up to the floor. Am I making something out of nothing with this? Or do you think there could be something here?

[sanjisluvbot]

Isekai Yandere Strawhats x Reader

Masterlist

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[ Check Masterlist for ch 9-19 ]

Sequel just uploaded 1

Life began to feel so boring. The days blended into one another and suddenly we’re in march. Staying up late catching up on your favorite show because there is nothing better to do right now. One piece was such a breathe of fresh air, full of adventure and characters that seem amazing to be around and explore the world with. You wished to be in the world where u can freely be who you wanted, the world where you weren’t shackled by the burdens of reality.

You’ve been around all the corners of the internet so you know of shifting and astral projection which is exactly what seems to be going on right now. Rewatching episodes leading up to the time skip around 4 in the morning till your eyes flutter shut. Suddenly the wafting scent of the ocean filled your nose. “ Is she a stowaway?” “ How have we just found her we haven’t been on land for over a week now”. You opened your eyes to the snout of a reindeer and other very familiar faces.

You sat up so fast knocking into the poor doctor. Panic set through you because the first assumption anyone would have is that they’re in a dream or— congrats you’ve finally lost your damn mind. “ Who are you people”.

“ We’ve got the same question for you”

“ well I asked first”

The blunt part of a sword was thrust into your face by a very angry green swordsman. Fear etched across your face you give him a once over. Zoro. To your left was Robin and chopper holding his snout on her lap. There should be absolutely no reason that you’re in this world with these wacky 15th century pirates from your goofy anime show. Your voice shakes as you try to convince the green haired man to stop threatening your life.

“ Listen this is surely a misunderstanding, I really don’t understand how I have gotten here and I’m not really too sure who you people are.”

Maybe if they think that I don’t know who they are I can figure out a way to get out of this mess without ruining the story.

“ What is your last memory before you woke up on our ship” a voice from behind spoke. Turning to the left at the top of the stairs was Nami with Sanji following behind her.

“ I was laying in my bed falling asleep and then I woke up here”

After that you were bombarded with questions, what’s your name, your age, if an 8ft skeleton can see your underwear and it nearly drained the life out of you. The sun was now beginning to set after such a long day of being interrogated by the crew you used to watch through a screen. The captain was sitting on the head of the Sunny watching the day fade away when he stretched his arm to you pulling you to sit with him.

It was quiet for a while and nerves began to set in. Does he see through me? I know a lot of people don’t give luffy the credit but he’s way more intelligent than you’d think. “ What is it like where you’re from y/n” he spoke as he turned to face you.

“ Very different.”

“ Tell me about it please”

The sun completely faded into night and the stars littered the sky while you told luffy about “ where you’re from” and he was absolutely entranced by the world he’s never been. You ended up telling Luffy the truth about your origins, somewhat about himself, there was just something so compelling and trusting about him you didn’t think nothing of it. You slept in the girls room next to Nami that night, thinking about the next step and getting home.

Was this really a dream or did your desire to escape mundane life make you shift into this world of unknown.

The next day you went to eat breakfast with the crew and luffy starts spouting all the things you told him the night before. With seemingly no thought behind his words as he swallowed everything on his plate, though his crew members all stopped to stare at you in confusion.

“ I thought you said you weren’t from here?”

“ You said you didn’t know how you got here”

“ Well I wasn’t exactly lying, I really don’t know how or why I’ve been transported into your world. I just didn’t want to scare you or make you think I’m crazy with all of this.”

Over the next few days you were beginning to settle with the crew, you spent hours getting to know everyone and having the most fun you’ve had in years. Nami and Robin were curious about your world and you were more than elated to tell them all the things you enjoyed. The boys liked when you played their silly games, Sanji was obsessed with everything about you and loved having you perched on the counter when he was cooking so you can serve as his taste tester.

Zoro only just began to acknowledge you after finding out you also had a love for drinking, it became really easy to bond with the man. You knew you had to go back but what’s the harm in spending time with such a loving group of people, it’s not everyday someone is given your experience don’t waste it being worried.

You were able to convince Nami to give you a blank sheet of paper where you wrote all the things you knew about shifting and astral projection. You’ve been with the crew over a week now spending every night trying to shift back to your world. Sometimes you feel close others are strangely disturbed by Robin and Nami whether they are sparking up a conversation with you or knocking things over which disturbs your concentration.

The next few days you began to see birds meaning you were finally reaching land, the sabody archipelago. You know the way this arch ends and you need to go home now before you spend two years on an unknown island doing who knows what because YOU aren’t a straw hat and you have no place where you can learn to polish your skills.

The bubbly island became visible and you’d be reaching it by midday, while you were sitting on the head of the Sunny with Luffy again he asked you his million dollar question.

“ Y/n join my crew” he smiled. Your cheeks burned and you had to turn away from the boy whose smile brightened all your days.

“ Luffy I would love to but—”

“ Great- EVERYONE Y/N” you clasped your hand over his mouth.

“ Luffy l can’t join your crew. I have to go home I don’t even belong in this world”

“ Why do you want to leave” sadness dripped from his voice.

“ Yeah, we’ve been having so much fun” the small doctor announced from the deck.

“ It has been very fun I’ll admit but I don’t belong here with you guys. I’ve got a whole life in my world— and a family and just so much to do.” You reasoned.

The rest of the day the crew seemed angry and distant, you simply couldn’t understand why. When they all found out where you really came from they said they would help you get home. During dinner that night you were seated between luffy and Zoro who barley uttered a word while hushed conversations were surrounding the rest of the table. It was insufferable and reminded you of elementary school when someone didn’t want to be your friend anymore and told everyone about it.

“ Luffy are you upset with me? I haven’t done anything wrong”

“ Why do you want to leave? You just joined the crew and were on a new island”

“ I never said I was joining your crew luffy”

“ you know the captain doesn’t take no for an answer y/n” Zoro chuckled.

With a huff you stood up everyone’s eyes landing on you. “ Are you all acting this way because you don’t want me to leave?”

“ Why would we want a crew member to leave us?” Nami’s voice wobbled as tears formed in her eyes. Are they serious? When did u ever agree or tell these people that you were a part of their crew.

“ Listen closely all of you. You have to understand I am not from here, I never joined the straw hats, and I don’t even have any powers I can’t protect myself.”

“ That’s why you have me Y/n-chwaaan”

“ ignore that idiot cook but you have Luffy and I, we wouldn’t let anything happen to you”

“ Who is an idiot you damn moss ball !”

A fight between the cook and the swordsman broke out and you would usually find everything hilarious but…

These people have convinced themselves you are one of them and they don’t want you to leave. You decided tonight will be the night where you will go home with or without their help especially because you already know what’s in store the next day. Laying next to Nami that night waiting for her breathing to even out so you can concentrate with no interruptions you hear soft sobbing.

“ Are you alright Nami..”

“ Y/n I know you want to go back but can you stay a little longer we all care about you and enjoy having you around. We really feel like you’re one of our crew mates”

“ Sure, I’m not missing anything important right now” lying is better than letting this girl cry all night. When her breathing finally evened out you were able to try again.

Eyes fluttering open you were finally in your own bedroom. It was just as you left it, your iPad paused on the intro to one piece and the sun was showing through your curtains.

I really did it.

Life began as usual but you had a newfound appreciation for all the little things that made life worth it. Friends and family found your new outlook pleasant and you finally felt like you turned on a new leaf. While you were getting ready for bed applying all of your creams and oils the Tv in the living room turned on.

Wealth, Fame, Power.

A chill ran through your spine, you haven’t watched the show in over a month in fear of being brought back into that world by some odd chance. Getting up to turn off the tv something in the hallway made a noise. The fear of someone or something being in your house had you clenching on the door knob for dear life.

Just open the door nothing is there you’re only scaring yourself.

Opening the door and walking down the dark hallway into the softly illuminated living room the episode of the strawhats finally meeting up after two years was playing.

“ My favorite arch I should rewatch soon”

“ Why don’t you live it instead?” A voice from behind hissed.

You felt your heart thumping in your ears as you slowly turned to be met with a very angry Captain.

——

Not proofread ! 🫶🏽

I was inspired by a similar stories I’ve seen down the tl hope you enjoyed. Pt 2 coming soon maybe

[respectthepetty]

Pride Petty Watch

Long story short, I owe the BL gods, so I'll be watching TWO series from my Petty List during the month of June. This list includes shows I haven't watched for purely petty reasons, so I'm asking the crowd to pick the two shows I will watch from all the MAME series, some censored Chinese bromances, a few sexual tension-filled Korean bromances, and one wild card.

I'm making my first ever poll, so whichever two series get the highest numbers will be the two I watch. And for all the kind people in the crowd, this is not the time to think about me. Pick your favorite. And for all the people who I annoy on the daily with my wild ass takes that piss you off, pick TharnType. But there is a possibility of a secret thirteenth option that would hurt me much worse . . .

The petty ass reasons are below the poll.

Disclaimer: If you're going to read the petty ass reasons, I need you to understand these are PETTY ASS REASONS, so don't try to hit me with 2,000 words about why me not watching censored bromances is a problem or why me not liking your fave hurts your feelings. Nah. Pick a show!

MAME

Love By Chance

This show came out at the end of 2018, and I watched the first episode, maybe first two, and thought it was boring. Then, in 2019, I saw a GIF of the locker scene, so I recommitted. I made it past the first episode just when the PerthSaint drama started spilling out everywhere, so I chucked the deuces and haven't returned since.

TharnType

For some reason, I couldn't find the first episode when it aired. Then, I found out how the first episode ended. Then, I found out about Type's past. Then, I just kept finding out more awful stuff until eventually the MewGulf shit finally hit the fan, and I was still reeling from the PerthSaint drama (and the emerging ZeeSaint chaos). At this point, I've built this show up so much that I'm afraid to see what it is actually about.

Don't Say No

A story of another GIF of a locker room scene sucking me in! After the first two MAME pairs blew up, I believed her shows were cursed, so I opted out of watching this one even though I thought it would be the one to vibe with me the most. But the biggest reason was because the main characters came from TharnType, so I felt like I would have to watch TharnType to understand this show, which was a big hell nah.

Love in the Air

I watched this through mutuals on my dash, so I feel like I did watch it. It is also the highest rated MAME series, so I had faith in it. However, when I found out about Sky's past, TharnType's ghost popped back up, and I realized this demon of a show is gonna haunt me in every MAME series.

The Wedding Plan

Y'all hated one of the leads so much while it was airing that I now hate him, and I don't think I can let that go, so I'm coming in with pre-hate and TharnType's ghost, but on top of that, some of y'all said it was boring. But what is boring in a MAME series? Consent? Not kidnapping someone? I never got answers, so I'm very conflicted about this show.

Censored Chinese

The Untamed

It's color coded, but FIFTY FUCKING EPISODES! What is this shit? Grey's Anatomy? The fuck! Second, once China pulled Addicted, I was holding grudges for life because it crossed from entertainment censorship into real-world oppression, so I could not bring myself to support media from a country that openly discriminates against the queers when I live in America where our highest court is just one Supreme Court Justice away from making us all live in the damn Mojo Dojo Casa House.

Word of Honor

It's color coded, but THIRTY-SIX FUCKING EPISODES! What is this shit? Supernatural?! The fuck! Second, I don't know the difference between this and The Untamed. Both are color-coded, one of them has a lot of uncles (?), one of them has awful facial hair, and they all have pretty outfits. Every time someone makes a reference about these shows, I just nod the same way I do when people mention Star Wars because none of it makes sense.

Guardian

I spent two years believing Killer and Healer was Guardian. I haven't watched either, but I thought they were the same show. Honestly, if this show wins, I might just watch Killer and Healer because I will forget they are not the same show. Don't they both solve cases? And because it's China, past lives must be involved, no? I'm looking at their MDLs as I write this, and I'm still not convinced they are different.

Stay with Me

It's color coded, but I know how it ends, and word on the street is that IS the ending since a second season seems unlikely. China couldn't just let me be hurt over Addicted, the original. No. Gotta hurt me again with Addicted, the remake. Rude af.

The Spirealm

First off, SEVENTY-EIGHT FUCKING EPISODES! What is this shit? Law & Order: SVU?! The fuck! I know how this ends, and it ain't happy! I don't care how people are trying to spin it, so to sit through SEVENTY-EIGHT DAMN EPISODES just for that ending already has me irate. And don't try telling me Viki combined episodes so it's only thirty-four. That's still a lot. However, everybody who has watched it says it's phenomenal, so is the pain worth it or are these people all lying so they convince themselves it was worth it?

Korean Bromance

Beyond Evil

With most Korean dramas, I feel like I missing something important. Like some part of the story does not click with me and I stay lost for the rest of the show. I suck it up for the queers, but the not-queers-but-it-is-queer shows . . . nah, and especially one about cops . . . (-_-). Also, The Worst of Evil just showed, and it was another reminder that I need these cops to quit their jobs and just screw each other. Embrace "Be Gay. Do Crime"

The Devil Judge

I know enough about Kpop to know GOT7 would not let one of its members kiss a man in this show. I looked at those GIFs of Jeff Satur and Jackson Wang on their show knowing damn well that if Wang got too close to Satur, an entire management team would have ascended from hell and kidnapped both of them, so the promo for this show was so wild because it felt queerbait-adjacent, and I was salty about it.

WILD CARD!

This option will be automatically unlocked IF this stupid little poll gets 216 votes, so I have high hopes this will not happen since I ain't that popular and I hate this wild card which is . . .

SOTUS

This show is my original TharnType. It came out in 2016. I watched it live. I watched the sequel. I remember neither. New was in it? Off was in it?! WHAT?! I have no memory of this show except Krist wiping his mouth, and I have carried that with me for eight damn years. I loved Be My Favorite, so I thought I moved past whatever strange grudge I was holding against this man who doesn't know I exist nor care, but then I saw that trailer for The Ex-Morning, and unlike Elsa, I can't let this shit go, so I'm willing to play Jumanji and go back into the jungle to finish this once and all.

So what it's gonna be, mi gente. Which demons am I facing for Pride and what shows do I get to stay petty about? Help me decide!

[sehodreams]

a good girl's paradox

TW and Tags: plus size!coworker!reader x coworker!lee tang (he changed his name to Gyeong-su in the episode), mentions of violent acts (stalking, killing, bullying), smut, p in v (with protection), fingering, oral sex (f receiving), suicidal thoughts, trauma, related to the series but it changes the storyline for the fic purposes, unclear descriptions of the place (Busan) because I have no interest into learning more geography for a fic.

WC: 10K

Summary: Everyone goes to that province to hide, and you’re not the exception, but it’s also said that everyone wants to leave, and perhaps, you’re the exception to that.

Comment: Sorry guys I know I have a lot of requests and other drafts waiting, but I love this man so much I couldn’t help it, I started it yesterday and finished it today because I've been having so many problems finishing other fics and decided this was not going to be one of those half done. It's long so there are definitely mistakes, please be kind, again, English is not my first language.

Feeling the ocean breeze mess up with your hair and leave little particles of salt on it, you sat over the bench and watched the sun appear over the horizon. It was incredibly calm, and beautiful, and you inhaled the aroma of the sea in front of you, an aroma your mother used to love when you were younger, always carrying you in her arms to take you there and watch the sunrise together while eating marmalade and butter sandwiches.

You stopped completely going there once she passed away, and everyone knew why you tried to avoid its existence as if it woke up all the melancholic memories you had with her.

The truth was, you always hated it, and you stopped completely going only because you had no reason to do it anymore. You could make your own decisions once she wasn’t around anymore, and your father never cared enough to keep you company even on important events, so for as long as you could, you just didn’t go.

However, now that you saw it in front of you, you did remember some moments with your mother, her smile, and her excited voice telling you to wake up and watch the sun appear.

‘’Fucking sea’’ you said once the sun completely stayed up there, an orange light showering the whole scenery making it even more breathtaking, but still hating it.

You stood up, grabbed the suitcase handle, and walked alongside the sea, trying to catch a cab in that part of the countryside little city, different from Seoul, which was always awake, you saw how only a couple of people were walking around there, and most of them where fishers getting ready for work, or maybe they were coming back, but you, a city girl your whole life, didn’t know.

You found a taxi not much later and telling him where you were going, the driver rolled his window even more, and giving you a good look, he nodded for you to jump in.

‘’It’s not far from here’’ he said, and you nodded, not feeling like talking much with him. ‘’When you leave, don’t let them charge you too much, never pay more than 15 dollars for any cab, and never go to the sea at night.’’

That last sentence caught your attention, sounding like advice but with a hint of uninterest, assuming that you were going to leave one day.

‘’When I leave?’’ you asked.

‘’You’re going to a rented apartment, I know that building, we know everyone here, and you’re a city girl, I can hear it in your voice, all pretty and clear, something happened to you there so you came here to hide, it’s always the same thing, but your kind never like it here enough to stay’’ he answered sure of his statement.

You looked out the window, the sea was blue, pure, immaculate, and the sun wasn’t orange anymore, a clear sky showing the clouds up there, which you could see reflected into the sea.

But it all looked so grey to you, after all, a beautiful thing like that one still killed people every now and then, fishers who tried to make a living, tourists curious of what was deep inside, or simply people who tried to refresh themselves with the cool temperature of it in the summer, so you nodded.

It was beautiful, a dream, but you would never fall in love with it, if you never did it before even with the memories of your childhood, why would you do it now?

‘’Thank you’’ you said, agreeing with him.

You’d never like it enough to stay.

Still, you kind of appreciated his words after living there for almost a month.

Something you never forgot was how that driver, only with that short conversation, helped you so much, because it was true, you never had to pay more than 15 bucks for any cab, and every time the drivers tried to take advantage of you because of your accent, you only had to spit a short fuck off before they called you a bitch and accepted your bills before driving away.

At first, it was hard, you had never cursed in front of another person and you felt almost sick whenever you did it, but after deciding no one knew you there enough to have the right to judge you, or reminding yourself to just say what went through your mind to not punish yourself later with an I should’ve done something different, you started to feel better with your life there.

Also, he had been right about city people hiding there.

There weren’t many, but they were there, and it was incredibly easy to recognize them.

Apart from the dialect, which was pretty much obvious, there was just something about them that screamed I’m not from here that you always noticed.

Perhaps it was the way most of you were programmed to be colder than most of the countryside people, always being respectful and polite, but always lacking that warmness they had, most of them treating each other like friends or family, while all of you were from the exterior, uninvited guests that one day would leave, and knowing your place, all of you said thank you, hello and goodbye without smiling or eye contact.

It wasn’t that bad for you thought, you had already told yourself to not be involved with people at all if it wasn’t necessary to avoid useless problems, but again, you were only a girl, and Gyeong-ah was just a girl too, and girls, as much as you tried to deny it, feel easily alone.

You met while buying groceries, and you knew immediately she was from Seoul because instead of choosing the detergent almost all the residents there bought, which had a powerful, almost heavy aroma of flowers to mask the sea smell, she chose the softer version without aroma that most girls that lived alone in Seol used to not mess with your perfumes.

You didn’t wear perfume, you never liked it, but you recognized the brand as if it was general knowledge taught at school.

‘’You’re from Seoul’’ you said before you could think it, and it wasn’t a question at all, it was a fact that she, when she heard it, couldn’t even deny because she recognized you too.

‘’You too’’ she said, and suddenly you had a friend.

Just as city girls, you two knew how to talk to each other, never crossing lines and being as cordial as you could, wanting to know but never digging too deep unless you were sure the other deserved to know delicate information about yourselves.

In a month you became best friends, and you started to like to live there, the grey color the area had wasn’t as grey anymore, taking a brighter variation now, almost becoming white, as white as her ceilings, or as the smile she sometimes showed you.

Both of you had really white teeth from performing as perfect city girls before arriving there, religiously visiting the dentist to get expensive treatments at least twice a year and using the famous toothpaste that girl group promoted on TV between music shows, with the phrase ‘’a pretty smile is a pretty heart’’ pushing half the population to buy it, effective, an incredibly overpriced.

Both of you stopped using it, but you respected how it still showed its results.

‘’The supermarket is opening a new position as a cashier, you could come if you want, you receive discounts as an employee’’ she said to the air when you were rambling about almost not having enough savings.

Even if it was the countryside and rent wasn’t even half of what you paid before, with everything you spent after unsuccessfully trying to fit the beauty standards when you lived there, your savings weren’t enough to live unemployed for too much time.

Next week you, instead of waking up to take a little walk before breakfast, now got ready to go to work and be a useful human being to society again.

And with that, both of you took a step further into your friendship, being able to reveal, after drinking a couple of beers, why you escaped from the city.

Gyeong-ah told you everything, from the pretty sequence of how she and her boyfriend met, to then what he did to hurt her, and how she suffered until she had to go through all those surgeries before she moved to Busan.

You told her everything too, how your boss pushed his hand under your skirt, how you reported it and how everyone looked at you as if you were crazy, ‘’She’s the one that reported the sexual assault case? She should be grateful anyone wanted to fuck her’’, and how, being completely alone, you were bullied until you had to quit.

‘’I was the first place in my class’’ she said.

‘’I closed the best deal the company ever had’’ you said.

Both of you cried until you fell slept together on her bed, and only woke up because both of you had to get ready for work.

It didn’t take long for you to get used to your new job, you were already a seller before arriving there, you knew how to talk to people and how to fake a good smile, charming customers into buying products they didn’t need and quickly gaining the manager approbation, because, after all, as everyone said, you were a good girl.

Sadly, Gyeong-ah didn’t have the same luck, and you understood her, she studied to do something different with her life, and you did it too, but she was younger and never had to learn how to make people love her before because she was incredibly gorgeous, but now that beauty wasn’t as useful anymore, and not knowing how to pretend as much as you, she couldn’t gain the appreciation you did, getting more scolds than praises.

It was on one occasion that her inexperience got her into a big argument with a client, and sadly you saw the first crack of your friendship appear.

That client was demanding a refund for a product without the receipt, and you wanted to run to her and repeat how you also couldn’t find the purchase on the system, but that woman was screaming so bad you got flashbacks of your boss’s wife screaming at you to take back the complaint, how her husband would never touch a disgusting pig like you (calling you that when she was as fat, to not say more, than you), and how you should just ruin your own life if you wanted to ruin someone’s.

She had the same voice tone, and even looked exactly like her, with dark red lipstick, a failed perm and all those cheap accessories, she was her spitting image.

You couldn’t move, watching the situation happen from afar, feet stuck to the floor and hands shaking, you repeated inside your mind to go and help her, to take her side, but you couldn’t, and making eye contact with one of the boys from the fish section when he walked in front of you, you closed your eyes to ignore the situation and not feel as pathetic as you did.

Later, when your break came, you went out to breathe as much air as you could, and trying to erase the memory of the past moment from your mind, you tried to think what could you do to apologize to Gyeong-ah.

Out there, between a couple of cars, in the middle of the immense parking lot, you tried to hide so no one saw you spiraling into a thousand thoughts, and there, almost breaking down, you stopped yourself from doing it when you saw the guy from before talking to that woman.

It looked as if she wanted to discuss with him too. He was beside her car, and she started to get closer to him while talking, you couldn’t hear it, but you saw her mouth moving as fast as before.

You were about to get closer to hear them, but you stopped once you saw a disgusting string of saliva being spit on the concrete by him.

It was so long and thick that you didn’t doubt it was a consequence of all those cigarettes he smoked every day.

You didn’t smoke, but Gyeong-ah did, and sometimes the smoke got impregnated in your clothes, so you could easily identify the Marlboro smell of the pack the two of them chose all the time, but he, unlike Gyeong-ah, had a smell a lot stronger.

Your thoughts were left aside once you saw the woman moving around nervous and he trying to take her phone. What the hell, you thought, and you were about to intervene when the woman jumped into her car and drove away.

Making eye contact with him again, he watched you for a couple of seconds before he turned around and completely ignored you, continuing to smoke his cigarette in peace.

‘’I don’t have time for this’’, you whispered to yourself and walked inside to talk with Gyeong-ah and not overthink anymore.

The first crack wasn’t deep, she said she understood it, and you hugged before finishing your shift and going back home to drink and badmouth that terrible woman, especially you, not thinking much of the woman from the supermarket, but of your boss’s wife.

She laughed while hearing all the insults you had about her appearance, going to sleep with a smile on her face and telling you that she would understand if the situation happened again because it wasn’t your fault, or hers, it was theirs for not understanding you two.

Little cracks continued to appear on the frame of your friendship, but it was still solid enough to survive everything.

At least, until Sangnim appeared, and completely smashed it to leave no trace of it.

That fucking bastard, as you used to call him, ruined everything with his existence.

The minute you saw him you knew something was off with him, you couldn’t help but notice small details when the two of them gave you a lift home, sensing the aroma of a perfume you used to smell a lot in Seoul inside his car, it was impossible Gyeong-ah was the only woman riding it, and you tried to slip a question without looking suspicious.

‘’Sangmin-ah, do you have sisters? I can’t believe how much you understand my Gyeong-ah’’ you said with a smile.

He made eye contact with you through the mirror and showed you a wide grin.

‘’I don’t have any sisters, but you’re so sweet, I really try to take care of Gyeong-ah as much as I can, she deserves it’’ he answered immediately.

‘’You’re right, she deserves it’’ you repeated, still smiling.

Shut the fuck off, you contained yourself from saying that out loud, nodding and looking around to find any other clue.

You couldn’t find anything, but he was definitely a cheater, and you, not having any solid proof, didn’t know how to break the news, so you pretended to not know anything to find the correct moment to say it.

Still, you left little comments every now and then, not blaming him, but leaving a trail of doubts around, doubts that sadly were never enough for Gyong-ah, fracturing too much your relationship.

You even thought that maybe you were exaggerating too, maybe deep inside you just tried to find a reason for her to end things with him, he was never going to stay, he said it before when you three had dinner, he’d go back to Seoul next year, and contrary to all predictions, thanks to your friendship, you liked it here enough to stay.

The future wasn’t bright at all, but it was enough for you, maybe in a couple of years you could escalate to a better position, you’d get benefits, you would walk around the beach every Sunday morning, and then you’d go and have breakfast with Gyeong-ah.

You had to apologize, for the sake of your friendship.

However, you didn’t have to, or more than that, you could never do it, because three days later Gyeong-ah passed away.

Waking up in your free day, you sent her a text to ask for an hour of her time to talk, but she didn’t answer in fifteen minutes, and you just knew something was wrong.

Taking a cab to her house, you saw the ashes all around, and how her room was the one who started it.

‘’It seems the oven was on’’ you heard one firefighter say.

Dropping to your knees, you denied it, because she always checked everything at least three times before going to sleep, it didn’t matter how drunk she was, she would check the door, the kitchen, and would unplug her phone charger from the wall.

‘’I saw on the news that chargers can get on fire’’ she said, and you laughed in her face because that only happened once every thousand times, ‘’Well, with my luck, I could be that one time.’’

‘’Shut up’’ you said while knocking three times on her wooden headboard.

 It had to be him, it had to be him, it’s the only answer, she would never do it, she wouldn’t let her oven on in a million times, they didn’t know her like you did, and sadly, soon no one would remember her like you did.

Calling her mother was the hardest part, you couldn’t remember how the hug of a mother felt in real life, and when she wrapped you into her arms, you broke down with her, because even if you didn’t know her, Gyeong-ah had been telling her about you, always finishing the calls with the same sentence, ‘’Don’t worry mom, my friend’s is taking care of me here.’’

‘’I’m so sorry, I should’ve taken more care of her, I’m so sorry’’ you repeated in her arms, and her mother denied it, saying how that wasn’t your fault at all, but you felt as it was, because you could've stopped her from seeing him, you should’ve stopped her the minute you figured him out.

You didn’t, and it didn’t matter how many nights passed, you couldn’t sleep with the guilt consuming you.

Looking at the beach at night one day, not being able to sleep again, you remembered how the first day you arrived you were told to never go to the sea at night, and right there, you understood why that driver told you that.

For the first time ever, you thought that maybe, maybe, you should just get lost in it, like the fishers, like the tourists, like the innocents.

You weren’t none of them, none of them deserved it, but you were convinced you did.

And you were about to go meet her, until you realized that, there, on earth, you could continue taking care of her, because even if she wasn’t there with you anymore, you could do what was necessary to make Sangmin pay for what he did.

You wouldn’t survive another I should’ve, so you would do it, you would do what was necessary, and nothing would stop you.

Finding Sangmin’s information wasn’t hard, you just had to do a couple of clicks on the internet, and you had everything you could need.

If only you had done that before, but you refused to go back into social media, all your profiles were flooded with hate comments from people you used to work with, or your boss’s family, or people who didn’t know anything at all but felt the right to talk about your body, and she had also deleted all kind of social media for a similar reason, so none of you knew how he was about to get married, and how you had been right about the smell of her fiance's perfume and all the little comments you had left around.

It was simply impossible how they met was a coincidence, getting sex extorted just like Gyeong-ah? He knew how to get close to her and break down her walls, he planned everything, and finally, you had no doubt about doing something.

You planned to wait for him out of his job, you wanted to do it quick and easy, and no one would suspect you, you looked like a good girl, you were a good girl, you were one until he appeared and stole the little family you had, he stole your whole life, and you would do it too.

With a knife in hand, you waited for him to get out of work, and you thought that he would drive his car, but he didn’t, so you followed him down the dark street to an unknown place.

Gripping onto your weapon, you felt your heart punching your ribcage, nervous as never before.

I can do it, I can do it, you repeated inside your mind, trying to convince you again.

But you couldn’t, and entering an alley, letting him go, you started to cry while hugging your knees, apologizing to Gyeong-ah for not being able to do anything for her.

You felt a cold sensation touch your nape and you jumped away from it surprised, looking up at the sky night and watching the guy from work you never liked.

‘’Drink this’’ he pushed the water bottle to your face, almost obliging you to take it, and your heart started to beat again, knowing he had seen what you tried to do, knife on the floor easily to differentiate even in the dark.

‘’Gyeong… Su?’’ you tried to remember his name.

‘’Go home, sleep, and tomorrow go to work, the manager keeps calling you and leaving messages, your position is still yours’’ he said, almost immediately walking away, but you stopped him gripping his jeans.

‘’You saw me’’ you affirmed,

‘’I did’’ he didn’t try to lie.

‘’Don’t you think I’m bad? I tried to do something really bad.’’

Your voice almost broke, and your hand on his jeans was trembling.

He looked down at you, maintaining eye contact and scanning you, and you felt as if he was inside your mind, finding exactly what he wanted to know.

‘’You’re not bad’’, he said after a long silence.

‘’You don’t know me’’, you replied as soon as he finished talking.

He shrugged and pulling apart from your grip, he talked one last time before leaving, ‘’That’s true.’’

Completely alone there, you cried again until you felt satisfied, and looking up to the dark clear sky, you apologized one last time to Gyeong-ah, and to your mom, and to you, and after drinking the whole bottle of water, you walked to the beach, burring the knife into a hole in the sand you dug with your own hands, to then go home, take a shower, and sleep.

The next day you had to go to work, and you needed to sleep at least a couple of hours.

When you arrived at work the next day you told yourself to completely ignore Gyeong-su, not wanting to talk with someone who had seen you in such deplorable moments like the ones you had.

However, again, you were just a girl, and not having anyone around you anymore, he was the closest thing to intimacy you had.

The relationship you had wasn’t deep enough to be called a friendship, he rarely talked about himself, only keeping you company when he smoked a cigarette in his break and when his turn finished.

You can’t remember how you started to get closer to him, you just remember seeing him smoke near the plastic table behind the supermarket, near the entrance in which all trucks left the daily order of products, and sitting next to him in silence, missing the smell of the Marlboro Gyeong-ah used to smoke.

Somehow, it brought you a calm feeling, and your mind stopped thinking, becoming a blank sheet that didn’t need to be filled with anything, not memories of her, or your past life in Seoul, or Sangmin, only breathing and watching the ugly metallic green bars that surrounded the place as if it was a prison, separating it from the outside world.

He didn’t mind you staying there, and days after days, you started to notice his presence around more often inside the supermarket, and the little behaviors he had.

‘’A man of few words’’, you called him when he didn’t answer your question if he was from Seoul too, thing he never acknowledged, but it was too obvious.

He didn’t have the province dialect, he had a soft way of slurring words whenever the manager or his superior in the fish section made him questions, like most boys in the city did, especially those who worked as part-timers in convenience stores, a polite but tired tone, and you were sure he had received some kind of superior education because when you carried a copy of Justice written by Michael Sandel, he followed it with his eyes until you pushed it inside your bag.

‘’Those who insist that only bleeding wounds should count believe that post-traumatic stress reflects a weakness of character unworthy of honor. Those who believe that psychological wounds should qualify argue that veterans suffering long-term trauma and severe depression have sacrificed for their country as surely, and as honorably, as those who’ve lost a limb’’ you quoted the next day while he lighted his second cigarette and seemed more relaxed next to you.

‘’I’m too dumb for that’’ was the only thing he said before exhaling a long line of smoke.

You don’t know why, but after hearing him so sure while saying that, and after such a long time, you were able to laugh again.

Things were slightly getting better after two months, you could sleep at least four hours now, and you were doing things again, not only staring at your TV when you arrived home. You opened old books she had left at your house, cleaned your place more, and ate proper meals, and you still cried, but at least you were able to smile when you saw pictures of her in your phone.

Still, there were moments in which you crumbled, and one of them was when you heard what happened to Sangmin a long time ago, only a couple days after you tried to do… that.

You heard it from one of the clients, how weird things were happening, first the death of a former worker there in the supermarket, and then the death of her boyfriend, and how now there were other two girls dead.

‘’This never happened before those people started to move here’’ her companion, another elderly woman said, and of course they referred to the people like you, people that weren’t born or grew up there, but you couldn’t help but only think in what you had heard about Sangmin.

Sangmin was dead, and what should’ve brought you joy for fair karma, instead made you hide in the warehouse, crying and spiraling into your thoughts about Gyeong-ah, and how you didn’t even make an effort to make sure she got her real justice, cleaning her name from everyone’s mouths.

‘’What’s going on?’’ you heard Gyeong-su’s voice come from behind the shelf you were leaning to.

‘’He-He’s dead’’ you answered, you didn’t need much to think of how to phrase it, he knew who you were referring to.

‘’Isn’t that what you wanted?’’ he asked you.

You stayed silent, muffled cries hiding in your knees.

‘’I don’t know, but I’m hurting so much, and all I keep thinking about is how Gyeong-ah must have suffered more than me when she left this place, and how I’ll never be able to know if he received what he deserved, even more, how because of that I’ll never be able to clean her name, and now no one will remember her as clearly as I do’’ you then confessed.

Feeling like a sinner telling a priest all of her secrets, you felt as if something had left your chest free, your mind finally was out there, formed into words and tears, and you didn’t see his face, but that let you speak your mind even more free.

‘’I see’’ he murmured, ‘’and you’ve thought that all this time, I guess.’’

‘’Yes,’’ everything was out, your tears sliding down your cheeks and your body lighter, almost numb.

‘’Well, you shouldn’t compare your pain, or hers, or his, each of you went through things none of you three know, she doesn’t know how you’re mourning her death, you don’t know how she suffered the process of it, and none of you know how he suffered his, those are things none of you will ever know, so it’s okay if you hurt, but you don’t have to think much into what he deserved, because you’ll never have an answer, and you shouldn’t condition what you feel into an answer you’ll never receive.’’

You sniffed your tears, looking at the packages of toilet paper in front of you, wishing you could take one to clean your face.

‘’And I do remember her, not as clearly as you do, of course, no one will, she was your friend, but I remember she liked to buy fresh tuna every Friday to eat with you, she always had a blank face when the manager scolded her or when she talked to rude clients, and she would rarely smile, but with you, she would do it in front of others sometimes.’’

You exhaled.

That was exactly her, she liked tuna when you hated it, and you picked on her for having an old man's taste buds, you preferred chicken over it, but you let her win every time one of you had to choose, and yeah, she did stare blankly at others, including you, but if it was a good day, she would smiled at you with those white pearls she had inside her mouth.

Feeling as if some heavy weight was lifted from your shoulders, you exhaled and let your head fall to the shelf you were leaning into.

‘’You two were the city pair’’ he finished, making you laugh.

‘’You’re also a city boy’’ you said, and he coughed, ‘’and you’re a liar, you said you were dumb.’’

‘’I am, I never understood that book’’ he said before grabbing the box between you two, lifting it, and going out, leaving you there alone.

You felt as if finally, you had taken a step in the right direction, moving from your position, you cleaned your tears with the ugly blue vest, too hard for your cheeks, and waking you up with the pain.

A week later another girl died, and your boss had to organize a meeting.

‘’It seems the current situation is getting dangerous, especially for young girls, so the superiors have ordered all the women to leave while the sun is still up’’ he said, and you don’t know if it was because of an empathy people from where you grew up didn’t have, but you got surprised when none of the men argued with it, everyone nodding in unison.

You had permission to leave early, so you did it, not being able to share Gyeong-su’s company when your turn finished, only seeing each other in the first break.

‘’You’ll miss me’’ you said the first day, and he never made any sound to acknowledge your silly jokes, but this time he let a soft snicker, almost imperceptible, that made you smile too.

You tried to always do what you were told to, so you left before the sun went down, but that day you were in charge of counting merchandise in the warehouse, so you didn’t see how late it was until you checked your phone.

It was even later than the time for everyone to leave, so you quickly grabbed your things, said good night to your male coworkers, and left.

You tried to not get paranoid with the news, they specified that the killer only directed its attention to pretty girls, loving long legs and soft features.

Gyeong-ah and Sangmin cases were mentioned every now and then to repeat how dangerous things were getting, but they were never related to the girl’s deaths, being two different situations.

That’s why, you tried to convince yourself you would be okay, you didn’t share any of the characteristics the killer loved in their victims, and he supermarket wasn’t far from your house, but you didn’t dare to walk alone anymore between all the buildings, so you waited for a cab to appear and take you home.

You made sure to always be careful when you were alone, yes you took cabs, but you always had a pen on your hand and your phone ready to call 119 in the other, checking the routes and if the driver looked at you too much.

Everything was okay, you were already relaxed when you saw your building in front of you, so you shoved your things in your bag, pulled out the bill, and paid, walking home with an easy mind.

You never thought you would get snatched right next to your door.

With a hand on your mouth and the other on your tummy, you felt how you were dragged into the alley next to your building, darkness surrounding you while you felt a disgusting presence behind you.

The one who pulled you in was a man, taller than you, with big hands and an erection already ready to make your worst nightmare real.

You started to cry, muffled by his gloved hand, you couldn’t say anything when you heard his voice calling you sweet treat, ordering you to be silent if you didn’t want things to get ugly.

Begging Gyeong-ah, your mother, and God to send you help, you nodded when he said he would let you go if you were good.

‘’Promise?’’ he murmured.

‘’Promise’’ you agreed, closing your eyes and letting his hand cup your pussy with force, not making a single sound, only trembling with tears running down your cheeks.

He pushed your face to the wall and made you show him your bubbly ass, touching it as much as he wanted without an ounce of shame.

You thought this is it, my karma, repeating inside your head how this was your punishment for all the things you should and shouldn’t have done.

The man couldn’t even open the button of your jeans before you heard a loud bang and his body fell to the floor.

Staying in your position, you pressed your face to your hands and didn’t dare to turn around to see what was making all that noise, it was metallic, and it didn’t stop even when the man didn’t make a single noise anymore.

When things got silent, you, still trembling, turned your head to see what, or who stopped the man.

You never expected to see Gyeong-su covered in black clothes from head to toe, paint all over the floor, covering the man's body and face, and the can totally smashed and tossed to the side.

‘’Uh?’’ was the only thing that came out of your mouth.

‘’I knew he was going to come for you, this sick bastard’’ he said.

You didn’t understand why he thought that, and watching your white sneakers get ruined with the blood and the red paint, you started to cry even more, still in silence.

‘’It’s okay, you’re okay’’ he said, giving you your messed bag and, once again, leaving you alone.

You called the police, the number still there on your screen ready to only press the green button, and when you did it, you said your direction as clearly as you could.

‘’Did you see who did it?’’ one of the officers asked you, and you stayed silent for a good minute before answering.

‘’I didn’t’’ then you said.

The two cops keeping you company looked at each other and then the one writing things down nodded.

‘’I see’’ was the only thing he said before leaving you alone.

You didn’t have much to do, the man was dead, and now nothing could be done.

Was that justice? You thought.

They immediately recognized him as the killer, he had a patron, pretty girls who lived alone, and all the bodies showed the same signs of abuse before dying.

Perhaps he had lied to all of them, and he had lied to you, convincing you that if you did no sound you would live, but you’d have died just like them at the end.

But did he deserve to die? Just like Sangmin, wasn’t there another way to get justice for your pain? For yours, Gyeong-ah’s, and all those girls’.

Still, what you knew was that, even if it was contrary to all your values, knowing how valuable life was, Gyeong-su didn’t deserve any punishment, he had saved you, and justice for you, was that he continued free out there.

The next day before you went to work, you saw rests of the red paint still over the cement, thin layers already dry after so many hours, cracked with the breeze of the sea, and you thought how, if Gyeong-su hadn’t saved you yesterday, what anyone else would have seen in daylight was your cold body lying out there.

All your coworkers hugged you when you arrived, and your manager told you to take the day off if you needed, but you couldn’t go back home or you’d start to overthink things again, if what you did was the correct thing to do, if he deserved to die like that, if you were a killer too, taking into account how you saved Gyeong-su’s secret.

When the first break came you walked out to the plastic table, but Gyeong-su wasn’t there, and hugging your coat, you sat to wait for him, but he didn’t come.

He avoided you for days, and you thought the pseudo-friendship you had was over, until a detective arrived and started to make questions about what had happened to you that day.

‘’You really didn’t see who did it?’’ he asked, and you denied again, already used to say that lie as if it was an unchanging truth, ‘’Do you mind if I walk around here a little bit?’’

You didn’t have a reason to say no, but your eyes caught how Gyeong-su opened the curtain separating the counter from the freezer where all the fish waited to be cut and packed to be sold, and how he immediately took a step back, not letting himself be seen.

You don’t know why, but you knew Gyeong-su didn’t want that detective to see him.

‘’I’m sorry, but I really don’t want to see any more cops lurking around, he’s dead, and looking at you only brings me back the bad memories of that night’’ you didn’t know why you said something like that, it didn’t make any sense, all the older ladies loved to see the cops near, feeling a lot safer, but you didn’t know what else to say to make them leave.

His younger companion frowned and was about to say something before the detective stopped him and nodded, leaving you his card and telling you to call him in case you ever needed help or remembered something.

You didn’t answer, shoving it into one of the numerous pockets your vest had, and turned your back to continue writing down the stock you were counting.

‘’Ugly girls should learn how to talk prettily at least’’ you heard the younger say.

‘’Shut up, she’s a victim, she doesn’t have to entertain you with pretty words’’ the older quickly replied, ‘’and you don’t know what you’re saying, her face is very pretty.’’

Jand Nam-gam, you read in the card he left you.

He seemed like the kind of person who was only respected by the people who were near him, used to receive no as answers, and a bit blunt and unsophisticated, from the city, just like you, but without the calm and respectable vibe a detective from there usually had, and too honest and correct to survive there for long.

When you went out for your break a couple of hours later you saw Gyeong-su sitting on the table, smoking and waiting for you.

You sat next to him and for the first time, you showed him your palm, asking for a cigarette too.

Without looking at you, he gave you the one he was smoking, still new and ready for you to take it.

Your fingers brushed his when he gave it to you, and you tried to not think much about it, but you always thought too much, so to shut your mind up, you inhaled the cancer stick and held it as long as you could, slowly letting the grey cloud appear in front of your face.

The city had the same grey color it used to have before Gyeong-ah, and you weren’t sure how long you could stay there.

Your imagination wasn’t filled with a future there, you didn’t want to walk around the beach anymore, you had no one eating breakfast with you in your head, and you were afraid every time your turn finished and you had to go back home, running the few steps to open your building door, and only feeling safe once you checked that your oven was off and you put a chair behind your secured door.

‘’I didn’t ask for your help’’ he then said.

‘’Me neither’’ you answered.

He nodded, still looking at the metallic bars surrounding you.

‘’How did you know I didn’t want him to see me’’ he asked, breathing the air and pushing his hands inside his apron pockets.

‘’How did you know he was going to come for me’’ you asked back.

He shrugged like every time you asked him anything he couldn’t ignore.

‘’I just knew he would come for you, after all, they said he followed pretty girls.’’

It felt completely different from when the detective said it, and you bit the inside of your cheek, feeling a warm sensation reach your cold hands.

‘’I just knew it too’’ you said, tossing the rest of the stick to the floor.

It tasted like shit, and you couldn’t understand how he and Gyeong-ah smoked it every day.

‘’I won’t come to work tomorrow.’’

You felt incredibly alone again, you knew he meant that he wouldn’t come back, he would, again, leave you there on your own.

‘’Can you walk me home today? I’m afraid of going on my own.’’

He knew why you asked him that, a goodbye, a farewell, so he nodded and told you to wait for him at the front door.

Your turn finished and then you were waiting for him right where he had told you, a good girl following his words exactly like he wanted.

You stayed there, hands playing with the leather strap of your bag, the bag you used when you lived in Seoul, too noisy in the province, reason why you preferred to go around with your canvas tote bag, a lot more discreet and common, but that one had been ruined with the red paint that day, and just like your white sneakers, you had to toss it away.

When he appeared he nodded at you, indicating you with a tilt of his head to lead the way.

You two walked on silent, you couldn’t make any question or comment or silly joke, and it was obvious, by the grip on your bag, that you were nervous.

He noticed it, and pulling out his hand from the pocket of his bomber jacket, he grabbed your left hand and held it all the way to your house.

You felt incredibly calm, thinking how you shouldn’t because you knew, deep down, that he was dangerous. It was impossible, by the fear of facing the detective, that he hadn’t killed more people, and it was clear he was being followed.

That makes sense, you thought, if you weren’t sent to that province because of work, like Sangmin, you were hiding, and he was just like Gyeong-ah and you, escaping from things that had happened in the past, or perhaps, things that were still happening now.

But you hadn’t felt so safe in so long, because you knew that, with him, nothing would snatch you next to your house, and that no one would be able to enter your house, or that your oven was never going to magically explode.

With him by your side everything was okay, you were okay, and that was enough to make all those preoccupations disappear.

When you got to your entrance you let his hand go to open the principal door with your key, and he was behind you, observing you, you could feel his eyes on the back of your head, but when you turned to him, he let his eyes fall to the floor.

‘’Do you want to drink some coffee?’’ you asked, and he nodded, following you inside and walking up the stairs until you got to your little apartment.

It wasn’t amazing, but it was yours. You didn’t have an elevator, and you always had to go up to the fifth floor to let your clothes dry with a big basket, but it was okay, you liked your building, your neighbors were quiet, and you felt safe and sound there. Until that happened.

Inside your room you let him close the door for you, and you didn’t feel the need to immediately put the secure on, leaving your coat on the hanger instead, and taking off your shoes, you walked to your little kitchen, putting water in an electric kettle to boil it.

You could cook in your kitchen, but you never used the oven, and you preferred the electric kettle over the traditional one because once the water was done, it would automatically turn off.

Then you sat on the floor, leaving two cups, sugar and coffee over the little wooden table you had, and turning on the TV, you looked at him in the eyes until he sat beside you on the floor.

He was wearing an ugly grey sweater that kind of smelled like fish, mascaraed with what you identified as the cheap deodorant you sold in the store, but you were used to the fish smell he had, so you didn’t mind.

‘’Do you mind if I take a shower?’’ He said not much after.

You nodded, the news had just started, and you mindlessly changed the channel to try to find anything interesting.

 ‘’Sure, there are towels in the cabinet, I’ll get you some clothes, they’re mine, but I’m sure they’ll fit you’’ you said, and he didn’t waste a second to walk to your bathroom.

You gulped while changing the channels, you knew what you were going to do, but you hadn’t done it in so long, you needed a second to recognize what that sensation forming on your abdomen was.

You hadn’t done anything at all, and you felt yourself already getting wet inside your panties.

The click the jug did after the water was done caught your attention and you stood up to get the water, pulling out the cord from the plug, but knowing you had to get him his clothes, you walked to your little closet to find a t-shirt and some pants that could fit him.

He wasn’t buff at all, but he was lean, a normal guy there, not fat, not big, not small, and taller than normal, so you decided to find the biggest clothes you had.

You were choosing when you heard the door open and you felt him walking behind you, hands surrounding your waist and wetting your back with the drops that were still sliding down his chest.

‘’I chose this’’ you said, lifting the clothes so he could see them, feeling his breath touch the side of your neck and his nose brushing your skin.

‘’I’ll wear them later then’’ he answered, pushing you to your closed closet and making you turn to him.

You weren’t that short, but just then you noticed how much taller than you he was. He made you lift your eyes to him with a touch to your hands, taking the clothes from your hands and letting them fall to the floor.

‘’I- I don’t remember much how this was… it’s been years for me’’ you admitted, and he nodded.

‘’It’s been years for me too’’ he said, not as ashamed as you.

With the same hand that tossed the clothes, he made you look at him and accept his mouth over yours, taking the lead in the kiss and erasing all your thoughts.

It felt good, his lips were chapped, and he had the taste of smoke in his mouth, but you didn’t mind, it finally tasted good, and moving your hands to his neck, you let him press his body against yours, the lower half of his body only covered by one of your towels.

He wasn’t hard, but you could feel something poking at the front of your jeans, and you wanted him to lay on your bed, so after a couple of long minutes, and just after he had enough of your mouth, you murmured something.

‘’Let’s go to my bed’’ you begged with hazy eyes and weak legs, leaning onto him, who was holding you with his body against your closet doors.

He nodded, and taking your hand, he guided you there, making you sit and look up to him.

Your lights were on, and you felt nervous, you had never had sex with the lights on, you only had a couple of partners, and they always turned them off before fucking you.

‘’You can turn off the lights if you want’’ you said, looking at him in the eyes.

He didn’t answer, his hand went to your cheek, and he pressed the tips of his fingers over your skin, caressing it and then brushing your wet lips after all his kisses, slightly red and plump thanks to the way his lips covered them.

He didn’t acknowledge what you said, bending down to retake the contact between both mouths.

Full of life, unlike his usual demeanor, eager, he pushed you to your back, making you receive him between your legs.

Slightly harder, you felt the border of his boner only covered by the fabric damp your jeans, but he didn’t stop kissing you, one hand lying on your neck and the other helping him stay still over you to not let all his weight crush you.

You opened your legs as much as you could with the jeans stopping you from going too far.

 ‘’You know what I’ll do to you’’ he said after a minute.

You nodded.

‘’I won’t stop’’ he warned.

‘’I don’t want you to’’ you answered.

You knew no one was going to save you from that place, it wasn’t his job, so you’d accept this as enough, and you’d let him go without resentment and an I should’ve done it.

‘’Will you be okay?’’ he asked, afraid of hurting you more.

‘’I want this to happen’’ you said, making him look at you, caress your cheek once again, and give you another kiss before his hands went to your button and helped you take your jeans off.

Sliding the clothing off your legs, he pushed your thighs wide open, and feeling the texture of the towel, his now hard cock against your clothed clit made you whimper.

‘’It feels good’’ you said, to what he agreed with you.

‘’It feels good’’ he affirmed.

He did soft movements to stimulate you with his cock, only letting you feel what would soon be inside you.

Looking at your eyes flutter, he pushed up your shirt, showing him your black bra hugging your chest.

Touching the skin uncovered by your cups, he pressed his thumb to see how far it could sink into your skin.

Your chest was bigger than normal, just like your tummy, but he liked it, it looked comforting and soft, perfect for him to rest a little bit, after his exhausting life, it looked like a taste of paradise.

You pushed his hands while taking your shirt off without asking, to then unhook your bra and toss it to the floor.

‘’Touch me properly’’ you said, making him snicker.

You had forgotten how that little grin looked like, and you smiled when it appeared again.

‘’Okay,’’ he replied, unabashedly grabbing both tits and groping them, looking at how the skin flooded his grip between fingers, and feeling good with both sensations, his cock against your cunt, and his hands in your chest, you closed your eyes and moaned, moving your head to your side and cover your mouth with the back of your hand.

He didn’t let you hide yourself for long, making you open your mouth for him and pushing his tongue inside your mouth, obliging you to let the moans out.

Your panties were incredibly wet, and he left one of your tits free to sneak a hand inside them.

Juices gladly receiving him, he groaned when he felt you dripping all over his fingers.

Without asking, just like when you took your shirt, he introduced a finger.

You cried with his mouth over yours.

His finger was long, and it sent a delicious shock to your core, making you frown at how good it felt.

‘’More’’ you begged, and he gladly obliged, pushing one more finger to make scissoring motions and prepare you for him.

‘’Shit, it’s begging for it’’ he groaned when he heard how much your insides were squelching, asking for him to fill you up.

‘’Yes, yes’’ you cried, listening to his nasty approbations telling you how good you’d take him, and how much he couldn’t wait to fill that sweet pussy of yours.

Fucking you with his fingers, you moaned as much as you wanted, not caring to hide anymore, it was your only night with him, so you decided to not hold anything.

His mouth went to your nipple, tits falling to the sides of how heavy they were and shaking with his attention to your cunt.

He licked them, first with just the tip of his tongue, but then let it flat so it covered your buds and made you shake even more.

‘’Su- so good’’ you cried.

His fingers were making you dizzy, and you had to get up on your elbows to see his hand inside your panties moving to make you cum.

It was hard to see yourself like that, so naked, so exposed.

You couldn’t hide the way your tummy rolls were in front of his eyes, the marks on your skin, or the way your big tits didn’t look perfect on your body, but he seemed to not care, even liking it, guiding his mouth to your nipples again and looking into your eyes when he left soft pecks over them.

‘’You’re going to cum for me, right?’’ he murmured when you started to clench over him.

‘’I-I don’t know’’ you cried, never having an orgasm with your partners before, you didn’t know if that was an orgasm, or what the hell was it.

‘’You’re going to’’ he didn’t ask, ‘’and it’s because of my fingers, so good’’ he pushed his fingers faster and harder, stretching your panties with how brutal he was.

You couldn’t maintain your position and dropped over your back, crying with your walls pulsating around him.

‘’That’s it, so fucking good, my good girl’’ he said still moving his fingers.

You tried to push his hand away, eyes rolling to the back of your head and tears falling down your cheeks of overstimulation, and he stopped when you left a singular loud cry out, but only to take off your messed underwear and toss the towel wrapping his hips.

He let you take a second to breathe properly again, and pushing up your legs, he made you show him your glossy cunt, lips open and ready for him.

He couldn’t help it, it was all shiny and pretty, he had to taste it a little bit, and sinking to his knees over the floor, he pulled your body to the border of the bed, mouth going directly to your pussy.

Drinking your orgasm, the slurping sound was so nasty you had to put your hands over your face, cheeks burning with embarrassment.

‘’That’s too much’’ you tried to stop him, but he, mouth still stuck to your entrance, and nose poking at your clit, denied with his head, smearing your arousal over his face.

‘’You have no idea all the things I want to do to you’’ he replied, pushing his thumb to your opening, and pressing his tongue over your clit this time.

You cried, hands going to his wet hair and trying to pull him away, but he was stronger than you, and you never had a chance to stop him.

You couldn’t fight him, so you wanted to finish quickly instead, hips jolting to feel him more and grasp that sweet second orgasm you felt coming.

About to call his name, he separated and said something before going back to his work.

‘’Lee Tang’’ he said, and that was enough for you to know what he meant.

That was his name, not Gyeong-su, but Lee Tang, and you thought, that fits him a lot more.

‘’Lee… Tang’’ you said as you could, and then the only thing that came out of your mouth was a ton of Tang, Tang, repeating proudly his real name.

You were so close that you could feel your toes curling, walls ready to let your orgasm free and relax again, and your back was curving, your body needing to cum once again because of him.

But he was so cruel.

He stopped, and getting up his knees, he thumbed your clit, flicking the little button a couple of times before he slid his dick between your lips, making you feel his length resting over you.

‘’Please, I’m so close, please’’ you saw the light of your room above him, watching his dark eyes examine you, searching for another answer in your eyes.

You left a disappointed cry when he, instead of touching, walked away to grab his jacket hung next to yours, and sitting, you saw him pull a little box from his pocket.

So that’s why he made me wait for him outside, you thought, he didn’t want you to see what he was buying.

Opening the film package, you saw him sliding the condom over his member with experience, walking back at you and showing you how it looked, slightly jumping over the air, standing hard and thick, and pushing you to your back again, he pressed his tip on your entrance, making you clench over it, and nodded to your past pleading. ‘’You deserve it’’ he said before pushing his member inside.

He didn’t let you adjust, but you didn’t need it, you just wanted him to keep moving, and soon that soft pace wasn’t enough for you.

‘’Fuck’’ you couldn’t hold the curses in your throat.

It felt so good, the weight of his member inside, pushing the limits of your walls, taking what he wanted from you, it was so good your hands searched for something of him to grip, finding his hands over your hips to maintain you in your place for him.

‘’Tang, so good, please make me cum’’ you cried.

One of his hands interlocked with yours, helping you find comfort between all the intense sensations your insides were feeling.

You looked so good under him, your chubby torse facing him, showing him everything he wanted to see, and your thighs jiggling with each of his thrusts.

You were close, and so was he, but he needed something more, a little thing that had been wandering inside his mind since he started to see you differently.

‘’Can you turn for me?’’ he asked, needing to see your pretty ass taking him.

Not answering, you immediately crawled further in your bed, and searching for your pillow, you hugged it, pressing your face to your bedsheets and showing him your ass without any ounce of shame left.

‘’Fuck me’’ you begged again, opening your lips with your fingers and showing him your entrance gaping around nothing, ‘’Tang, please fuck me.’’

His breath stopped, he had never seen something that bold and hot before, and he admired your needy side calling for him to calm you.

Going to you, he pushed his entire length inside, bottoming out and pushing it inside in a single thrust to see your gorgeous back and thick thighs trembling with his cock.

You were crying and hugging your pillow, shoulders becoming smaller and one of your hands on your back searching for his to hold it again.

Lee Tang, not daring to ignore you, his good girl, like that, held your hand.

‘’You’re the one who wanted me to fuck you, and now you can’t take it?’’ he teased, not liking how much he was spoiling you.

‘’No, I can take it, please don’t stop’’ you implored, feeling his hard and fast thrusts pushing your sanity away.

He didn’t care how weak he was to you, feeling your walls wrapping around him like that was like nothing he had felt before, watching the curves of your waist interrupted with your little fat rolls, your ass bouncing against his pelvis with his strength, taking his cock like a gift, and your hand not letting him go even with how hard he was being with you, was everything he ever needed.

Hearing your sweet moans and cries all out when you came, with your sweet walls fluttering around him, pushed the last string inside him, and he pressed his cock inside you to let everything out in the condom.

‘’Tang-‘’ you gripped his hand harder.

‘’Yes baby, I’m cumming’’ he exhaled, letting all inside you.

 ‘’Okay’’ you said happy.

He wished he could stay connected to you forever, but he couldn’t, and he had to pull out of you to make sure the condom, and you, were alright.

Going to the bathroom to toss it in the trash, he looked at his reflection in the mirror, not recognizing himself with how relaxed he looked.

Tense all the time, he saw his eyes drowsy, ready to rest the whole night.

You, lying on your side to catch your breath, hoped that he could at least spend this night with you, his last night there, but maybe that was too much to ask.

When he came you didn’t look at him, and he simply accommodated behind you, spooning you with a hand over your tummy, letting his hand land there, and sighed.

‘’Let’s get inside the covers, the night is cold’’ he murmured, and you followed his request.

Under your bedsheets, a lot warmer thanks to the fabric and his skin, your mind started to drift away, so you looked at him one last time before falling asleep, closing your eyes when he left a last kiss over your lips.

When you woke up you were alone, feeling incredibly sore, and sad.

You stood up to drink a glass of water, not thinking much about how lonely you felt, concentrating on what would you do later that day to fill your head.

Would you be able to stay? You doubted it, you had too many memories here, and maybe the driver was right, all of you would leave one day.

You were about to go back to bed when you saw a little note next to your electric kettle.

I’ll come back in three weeks was written, and you closed your eyes, happy to not be abandoned again.

You had to stay so he could find you, that was your home now.