#i have hesitated twice now when ive seen it.. it really shows how much trust she has in us..

[tears-of-boredom]

Really wishing my water was vodka

[wrathandgreed]

(I hope requests are still open) So ive been thinking. How about the brothers reaction to MC taking a large step away from them when ever one of them raises their hand up. It could be as simple as a high five. MC used to be in a abusive relationship and is paranoid about getting hit

Note: (For the record, I don’t know if you sent me this on purpose - I’ve never done requests; I’ve literally just put out my very first OM headcanons. But I figured I could try. I’ve never been in an abusive relationship, but a number of my friends have. I really hope I can do this one respect - if anything about this is not on the level, please let me know! Also, if I missed a trigger warning in the tags, or tagged this wrong, let me know. Also, for the record, I tend to like soft!Brothers and I really wanted them to try and be better - not put the onus on MC to “get over it” or anything.)

Second note: After writing this, I’m not sure that most of these guys would be a good choice for an abuse survivor! 

Third note: I am NOT good at keeping things short and, as usual, I went overboard with Asmodeus. Like, it should be its own fic at this point. But write what you want to read, right?

Warnings: references to domestic abuse, both physical and verbal. References to suicide baiting. Uncensored swearing.

~5K words

Lucifer

A strange choice; his perfectionism and exacting behavior sometimes make you remember how it was back in the human world; everything had to be JUST SO….or else.

And he’s threatened to kill you. Twice.

But there’s something inherently decent about him - and you live for the rare moments he laughs.

His perfectionism usually isn’t even about you, so you just kind of….ignore it.

You’re doing some of your RAD homework in Lucifer’s study.

It’s quiet there.

And, while he won’t do the work for you, he’ll definitely help when you’re stuck.

Also you can give him tea and soothing when he (inevitably)  gets upset at his paperwork - Mammon’s bills, Asmo’s bills, Satan’s bills (hey, dark magic books are expensive).

You start hearing the shifting and muttering that herald the beginning of the rant.

You gather the tea and walk towards his desk.

“Devil’s sake!” Lucifer suddenly snaps out, slamming hand on his desk as he reads yet another ridiculous piece of paper.

It’s not at you, the anger isn’t at you, you KNOW it’s not at you, but you freeze anyway.

Slammed hands on desks, punched holes in walls, hands on you, always hands - 

The cup of tea hits the floor and you’re out of the room before Lucifer can even look up.

He’s seen it all in your paperwork - the police reports, the restraining order, the lists of injuries - so he puts it all together before his study door closes behind you.

He knows better than to go after you immediately. You’ll want some solitude, some quiet on your own, to steady yourself a little.

If he goes after you now, it might frighten you more. Looks like hunting.

You need to know he’s calm, that he’s not acting or reacting out of emotion.

He takes his time cleaning up the spilled tea, straightening his papers.

When he shows up at your room, he has a mug of hot chocolate.

“I’m sorry,” you blurt out before he can say anything. You made a mess in his study, and he’s such a stickler for everything being neat. He was angry before, but he’ll be even more angry now.

“No, I’m sorry,” he returns, and offers you the chocolate.

(You blink once. Has the Avatar of Pride ever apologized before? If so, it was never in your hearing.)

The two of you talk quietly for a time. He insists that you don’t need to apologize - ever. He insists that, while he appreciates the tea-and-break routine, it’s 100% not your responsibility to control his anger. It’s his. He says that his anger isn’t good for him anyway (just look at Satan) and he needs to take a break when that hot feeling starts. 

Maybe he should start scheduling breaks; setting timers on his D.D.D. so that he no longer works long enough at once to let it all get to him.

He doesn’t want you afraid of him.

Mammon

Mammon is pretty much the only demon who HASN’T threatened your life. He often sounds irritated, but he’s never even sounded angry at you.

If anything, he’s a mush and an abuse victim himself. So he gets where you’re coming from, and tries really hard.

So you shouldn’t be afraid of him.

But….he moves too quickly. He’s constantly jumping from one idea to another, one topic to another, one emotion to another. And that’s just emotionally.

You can’t trust where his hands will be. Ever. And that’s not a sex thing.

Sometimes, his protection of you makes you feel safe. If anyone hurts you, Mammon will hurt them a thousand times worse.

He’s funny, and his hands on you are gentle, and once you tell him about your past, he tries really hard not to go back to his “stupid human” habit, because it hurts your feelings.

But sometimes, his protection feels like obsession. Why were you talking to that guy? C’mere, you’re MY human.

Then, inevitably, the tug on your hand or arm or waist, pulling you closer.

It starts simply enough.

You’re playing video games in his room. He’s not as much of a gamer as Levi, but he enjoys them.

Especially ones where you can be competitive or drive cars really fast.

He’s been getting more and more excited, coiled like a spring. And it’s from enjoyment, not anger, but that level of energy, in your experience, explodes at some point.

You get quieter, but that only makes him more boisterous. He wants you to join in the fun! C’mon MC, did you see that?! It was awesome!

After a really impressive win, he shouts in triumph and suddenly his hand is in front of your face for a high-five.

You recoil and hit the floor, crab-crawling backwards before you can stop yourself.

His look of complete confusion, in different circumstances, might be funny. He actually looks at his hand like he doesn’t recognize it.

He drops to the floor too, “Babe? What’s wrong? Y’okay?” And he reaches out a hand towards you.

When you flinch, he gets it.

He sits on the floor, stuttering out apologies, not even finishing one sentence before starting another. He makes sure he’s cross-legged, leaning back on his hands - non threatening, leaning away, hands not hidden, but not prominent, and in a position it would take him time to move from. 

When you start crying, he can’t maintain that pose and crawls towards you, pulling you into a hug.

If you resist, you know he’ll let you go. And that’s why you just curl into him instead, crying out on his shoulder while he holds you close - but not tightly.

“I jus’ need ya to talk to me….let me know if I’m gettin’ to be too much. I know I’m loud. Just….. jus’ remind me, I’ll never be mad.”

Leviathan

Boy already has anger problems.

Envy’s kind of prone to it, you know?

On the one hand, he literally attacked you over a piece of TSL memorabilia.

On the other, he’s generally harmless the rest of the time.

He’s meek and shy and terrified of touching you - so, 95% of the time, you feel super safe with him.

When you wake with a nightmare, when something jump-starts your fear response, he talks you through it, easily abandoning whatever game or anime he’s involved in.

He’ll only touch you when you ask, or when you reach for him first.

But then there’s the MMOs.

You know you should leave when he starts getting mad. Not in a victim-blame sense, but for your own mental health it’s probably not a good idea to be around him when he raids.

He ALWAYS gets mad.

You’re sitting in his room, so involved in your handheld that you forget it’s his raiding night.

(Usually you make study plans with Satan, or shopping plans with Asmo on his raiding nights. You don’t want him to give them up; he enjoys them, but it’s not good for you to be around.)

After finally completing a tough level, you pop your headphones off just in time to hear Levi swear loudly.

You go still as a string of swear-filled trash talk fills the room. Things you’d never expect shy, needy Levi to say. 

You know it really is just trash-talk - the threats of violence are just too absurd. Rip off their arms and use their own fingers to bowl their skull like a bowling ball? Really?

Also this is LEVI. Levi? The demon who needed you to taunt Mammon about his credit card because he couldn’t do it himself? He might be Admiral of Hell’s Navy and all, but he’s not exactly threatening.

You get to your feet, a little shaken but ready to just walk out of the room. It’s raid night, and this is why you don’t hang out on raid nights. You’re not comfortable around other people’s anger.

You’re halfway across the room when Levi suddenly shouts in frustration and throws his controller on the floor.

And you’re out the door.

Levi just glimpses you as he’s reaching to pick up his miraculously-unshattered controller from the floor.

“Henry?” He calls out, just a second too late.

With only one moment of hesitation, he logs out of his raid and goes to follow you.

You had less than ten seconds head start, but it takes him almost twenty minutes to find you, sitting out in the garden, gazing at nothing.

“MC?” He calls quietly. He doesn’t want to sneak up on you.

A single blink, and the tiniest flash of fear - he left his game to follow you. 

Calculation: extreme concern - or extreme anger. 

Conclusion: Undetermined.

So you wait.

“Are you ok?”

Okay, so not mad. “Aren’t you raiding?” You ask, instead of answering. You’re not ok, but you’re also not in the mood to talk about it.

“I, uh, h-had a, uh, power outage?” Even he doesn’t sound convinced, and you snort. Levi only has three modes: simple, stuttering, and verbose. Thankfully he goes with simple. “You ran out. I was worried.”

You debate brushing his concern off, but he deserves better than that.

“I’m not good with anger. Even if it’s not directed at me.”

“Oh.” Levi pauses as he considers. He knows the basics of what’s happened. “I - I mean, I could, you know, NOT - “

“No,” you say quickly and lean in to kiss his cheek. “You don’t have to change anything. Do your raids, make stupid threats to stupid players. Just….warn me to leave first?”

Levi nods, but he skips the rest of his raid to stargaze with you in the garden, arms wrapped around you from behind as he points out different Devildom stars and constellations to you. You get a lecture on how Devildom stars are used in Devildom sailing. It’s actually kind of interesting.

Satan

Okay, seriously? The Avatar of Wrath? Author speaking here, I literally can’t picture a worse combination than an MC who’s still recovering from domestic abuse to date the AVATAR OF WRATH.

Like, yeah, he has good control over himself, but he also loses his temper in a moment’s notice.

He has CANONICALLY tortured people for calling him strange.

He flips out with no warning and destroys parts of the house and his brothers just let him do it because he’s too powerful to control when he rages.

I can absolutely see MC falling for the quiet intelligence, the consideration, and so forth, but witnessing one (1) single rage should be enough to tell them that this relationship won’t be good for their mental health.

Let’s not even talk about the (again, canonical) desire for domination, power play, pet play, etc, that kind of defines our boy.

I mean, I love Satan. Out of all the bros, he’s the only one I could imagine legit dating in real life.

But I’m a little ball of rage myself, and I have no problem with anger, mine or anyone else’s.

And the fandom (including me) can totally play cute and love on their “soft little angy boi” all they want, and he definitely has soft, sensitive sides, and I may actively choose to ignore the whole domination/power play/etc when I fic or headcanon because I really love soft!Satan….. but he’s not.

I can’t even make a headcanon, because I cannot picture a situation in which this is actually GOOD for MC.

Because no matter how hard he’ll try and control it, and how much his rage probably won’t be directed at them, I just keep picturing “It won’t happen again” except it will, and it’ll just wind up being flashbacks to the number of times “It won’t happen again” ended in black eyes or an ER visit back in the human world.

And MC walking on eggshells for eternity to avoid setting him off, and how is that healthy?

Asmodeus

Another decent choice for MC, at least on the surface.

King of consent over here, at least how I picture him. Especially for someone he cares about.

Always accepts “no” about literally anything. Don’t want sex? We’ll cuddle. Cuddling a little confining? Holding hands is cool. Really don’t want to be touched at all right now? Gossip and tea! 

You were coming to really care about the Avatar of Lust, and you believed what Simeon said about him - how much he desperately needed love and affection. You got it; you needed some, too. 

I mean, even if he’d been a bit of a jerk, he’d warmed up significantly since the pact, so new that it still burned on your skin, was formed.

But even Asmodeus wasn’t without faults. However much he focuses on love, he can sometimes, really be….mean.

You’re standing on a balcony in Diavolo’s castle, having escaped for a few moments.

He’d always been catty, gossipy, filled with drama, but the genuine affection and likability of him sometimes made you ignore it.

His constant mocking of Luke you could put down to the whole angel/demon conflict. 

His occasional snapping or poking at his brothers you could put down to being stuck in the same house with the same people for literal eons.

The only thing that might make up for your awful existence is if you just ended it.

The words haunt you as you stand looking up at Devildom’s endless nighttime.

How many times did you hear similar words yourself? How useless you were, how much of a burden, no way you’d survive on your own without him, and he didn’t even want you that much. Why didn’t you just go kill yourself?

Dammit, you think to yourself as Asmo steps out on to the balcony.

“Darling! Why are you out here all alone? Or are you waiting for some company?”

When he goes to put his arms around you, you just say “no.” Simply, quietly, emotionlessly.

Asmo circles around to look at you. “Something wrong, sweetness?”

You take a breath. Another. You consider swallowing it, again, don’t want to start a fight. Back down, put on a smile, ignore it.

But realize you can’t. You spent years dealing with this crap, and you’re not going to do it again.

“You’re mean, Azzy.” Your voice is quieter than you expected. You look up into the demon’s eyes. To his credit, he looks deeply confused and, as you take a step away from him, hurt. Before he can open his mouth, you continue, “How could you say that to Mammon?”

“Are you defending MAMMON?” He asks, torn between incredulity and anger.

“Right now? Yes. But also Luke, Lucifer, and everyone else you talk shit to. Or about. He’s your brother. Do you have any idea how much it hurts to hear that out of someone you love?”

Dismissively, “Oh, if it actually bothered him, he’d - “

“What? Beat you up? That’s not like him. So he takes it. And takes it, and takes it, until, because it’s all he hears, he believes it. And then why fight back? Why defend yourself, if you’re such a piece of shit? You deserve it, after all, right?”

You don’t even realize it, but you’re crying by this point. And you’re mad. All the mad you couldn’t fling at your abuser before is filling you now. You don’t even know if you’re talking about Mammon or yourself anymore. Maybe both of you.

“And even though he’s beaten down, you keep going. When he won’t respond to the usual anymore, when that doesn’t seem to hurt him, rile him up, you go worse. You told your brother, who you claim to love, to kill himself. We’re barely even friends. So what happens when I annoy you? Should I just go die now, save you the trouble of telling me to do it later?”

You step right up to him, into his personal space, almost nose to nose, and stare directly into his red-yellow eyes. “Is this who you are, Asmodeus?”

Asmo has gone from defensive; incredulous and angry, to baffled, hurt and worried in just a few minutes. But at your last, pointed question, he jerks his head back as though you slapped him. Not knowing what to say or do, he reaches for you again, but you dodge his hand and brush past him back into the castle.

You get Solomon, the only one who won’t ask questions, to switch rooms with you. (Luke is thrilled; teaching him to play gin rummy actually cheers you up a little.)

For a few weeks, you and Asmodeus pass each other in the House without speaking.  Then, one evening, there’s a knock on your door and Asmo slides into your room.

He looks….well, not awful; he could never look awful. But the glow is gone from his skin and, unless you’re mistaken, he hasn’t bothered doing his hair. He looks like he’s missed some sleep.

You look up from your homework and watch him. Silently. It’s not your job to fill the silence anymore.

More than most of them, Asmo despises being vulnerable. But it’s fix this or not, and the pact is pushing him to be on good terms. At least, he blames the pact. It’s easier than acknowledging how much the weeks of silence have worn on him. How awful it was watching you walk to class with Mammon instead of him. 

And no matter what, he values honesty in his relationships, no matter what kind of relationship. So he would be honest.

“I don’t know,” he says quietly.

Lean back in your chair, hands folded. Waiting.

“I don’t know….if that’s who I am. Maybe it is.”

“Why are you here, Asmo? What do you want?”

“I want you to stop ignoring me!”

Steady face. “I spent too many years having someone talk to me the way you spoke to your brother. The rest of it - the gossip, the side comments, the cattiness…. it’s not your best side. In fact, it’s pretty unattractive when it’s mean, but I could handle it. But I can’t handle cruelty. I don’t want to be around it anymore.”

A pause. “What is my best side then?”

Disgusted, you chuck a pen in his direction. “Fuck’s sake, Asmo. Get out.”

“No! Not, not that. If that’s my bad side, the **unattractive** part, then what’s the other half?”

You search his face, but he doesn’t seem to be fishing for compliments. If anything, he looks….lost. Confused. And you wonder if anyone’s ever said anything to him, good or bad, about who he was; not what he looked like or how he fucked. 

It’s not your responsibility to psychoanalyze a demon, you think to yourself. But you’re not someone to walk away. You wonder how it’s possible for someone to be thousands of years old, and know less about themselves than you know about yourself in just a few decades. And you have nothing to lose by being kind.

“You can be wonderfully kind, Asmo, and generous. You want to see the beauty in everyone and everything. As nasty as you can be with it, I’ll give you points for honesty. You connect with people, and the times you’re actually genuinely interested in them is….charming.”

He’s silent for a few minutes. Then he nods, as if he’s made a decision. “Okay. Tomorrow, after RAD, do you want to go for bubble tea?” At your confusion, he just smiles and continues, “It’s like skin care, isn’t it? Attractiveness requires effort, darling, until it becomes habit. If I want to be attractive inside as well as out, I’ll have to practice the good things, so they outweigh the bad. I can’t do that alone. I need a practice partner who won’t tolerate failure, right? At least until it’s habit.”

You feel your entire brain have to reboot before you can give a coherent response. 

“Tomorrow. One hour. I have papers due.” You wait until he leaves your room before you smile.

Beelzebub

Probably the best choice for this MC.

The most emotionally intelligent of his brothers.

Also the most sincerely kind and gentle.

But also, like Satan, prone to sudden outbursts and rages. They’re all food-related (or, rather, lack-of-food-related), but they’re there.

A smart MC always carries snacks while dating Beel. Phone, wallet, keys, fried bat wings.

Strangely, though, the food-induced rages don’t really bother you. It’s not anger, really, and it’s never once been directed at you. And, unlike back in the human world, there’s a concrete way to help: feed him.

Today you have a whole backpack full of snacks.

You’re with Belphie, watching one of Beel’s games at RAD.

(You’re not sure Belphie wants to be there, but you’re not allowed out alone, and Belphie decided to take you - keep you safe and support his brother. Two birds, one Belphie.)

Belphie tends to nap against your shoulder any time the ref goes to make a call, but he’s somehow always awake to clap for his brother. 

(You stand on your chair and cheer, but that’s you.)

The game is a close one; double overtime. Even Belphie is too tense to sleep towards the end.

And at the end of double overtime, Beel manages the single extra goal that results in victory.

You cheer yourself hoarse for your demon boyfriend.

The whole stadium is crazy, so you hang back and wait. Belphie hates crowds and you’re not keen on them yourself. It’s going to take awhile for Beel to make it through the crowd to you anyway.

You’re standing in the aisle, scrolling through your phone, when suddenly there’s a loud shout and arms wrap around you from behind and lift you up.

You gasp, and your scream strangles in your throat so what comes out of you is nothing more than a squeak. Your phone goes flying.

You’re frozen for a moment as panic surges. You want to fight and you’re fighting your own brain to push the panic into your limbs so you can fight for yourself.

You vaguely feel a tugging and you hear someone - Belphie? - insisting that you be put down and then your feet are on the ground but there’s no such thing as your legs and you start to fall before the same arms help you gently sit. The ground is gross, but you’ll only care about the damage to your skirt later.

Everything is fuzzy and confusing; you’re not even sure of what you’re looking at until your vision is filled with blue and violet.

You know that swirl of color. That’s a SAFE color, and you start feeling your poor brain start to work again.

You blink into your boyfriend’s blue-violet eyes; you realize he’s cupping your face with his hands and the weird underwater noises start to sound like his voice. You realize, very belatedly, that what probably happened was Beel lifting you up in a victory hug.

“M’okay,” you say, but it sounds robotic. It takes a few more seconds - you don’t know how many - for all of your senses and brain to actually begin working in sync again. You start hearing the sounds of the crowd departing the stadium, and you hear Beel continuing to say your name and trying to get you to answer questions. You almost smile; but smiling wouldn’t make any sense.

“I’m okay,” you say, and you must sound a little more convincing this time because Beel looks relieved. He shoots a few more questions at you, and you realize they’re the kinds of questions people get asked when someone thinks they have a concussion or head trauma.

Your answers satisfy him, so Beel helps you to your feet. 

“What was that?” He asks. “Low blood sugar? Are you hungry?”

You have to smile at his very-typical diagnosis. A little sugar wouldn’t hurt, though. For some reason, eating grounds you after something like this. You dig a chocolate bar out of your Backpack of Snacks (Snackpack?) and hand the rest to him.

He impatiently takes a bag of chips out of it but doesn’t open it. He looks at you expectantly and you realize he won’t eat until you do. So you take a bite of the chocolate and he looks more relieved.

“So what the fuck WAS that?” Belphie asks as the three of you move towards the exit.

“Later.” You haven’t yet found a reason to really tell Beel (and, by extension, Belphegor) about everything. You do later that night. 

Beel swears he’ll never surprise you like that again. He’s a lot more cautious about touching you for a few days, but eventually things go back to normal between you.

Belphegor

Author note: Dude fucking murdered you, deliberately, in cold blood, and taunted you for your gentleness and desire to help as you died. But let’s say you can get past that - or try to. Probably the second-worst choice, after Satan, for this reason.

You started dating Belphie for the strangest reason: you could trash-talk the shit out of him.

He kept trying to be around you after you made the pact (which, let’s face it, you made so you could MAKE SURE he never hurt you again). Until, after politely dodging him wasn’t working, you told him to take his emo-boy routine and fuck off somewhere else.

You flinched, waiting for retaliation, but he just blinked at you and told you to stop being a brat.

And he was smiling.

But it wasn’t a mean smile - it was a smile that shared the joke.

Your lips quivered into a returning smile, and you threw another insult at him.

He topped it, and hurled one back.

Before you knew it, the two of you were screaming obscenities at each other in the middle of the common room and laughing like hyenas.

For some reason, Belphie calling you a dumb bitch wasn’t an insult. It was a mark of endearment. And it didn’t hurt your feelings or make you afraid.

It was empowering to call him a dickhead if he did something you didn’t like and have him simply laugh and amend his behavior. Nothing bothered him.

He didn’t move quickly; in fact he didn’t move at all if he could help it.

But you would remember, sometimes, the way his hands felt on your throat, or how cold his eyes had been. And you couldn’t say it was a momentary madness, because he’d planned it. He’d been imprisoned because he wanted to kill humanity.

You put it out of your mind. It was something you were good at, after all.

Until the two of you sat down to watch a movie one evening. A simple plot hole sparked a discussion that wound up being….not an argument, but definitely a difference of opinion.

As usual, insults were flying fast and furious when suddenly Belphie laughed and smacked you with his pillow.

It wasn’t an angry move, and it wasn’t hard enough to hurt. It wasn’t a hard blow at all! But the surprise had you falling back on the couch. And the fear had you curling into a ball, arms wrapped around your head protectively, legs curled up to guard your middle.

There is dead silence.

“Hey, Brat?” Belphie asks. When you don’t answer, he calls your name instead.

You slowly, very slowly, begin to uncurl yourself from your position. It takes time for the residual fear to leave, but enough is gone to leave room for embarrassment. 

“Sorry,” you mutter. 

“I get it,” is the answer.

Cue awkward silence.

“I figured you were still afraid of me.”

“I’m not!” When he just stares blandly at you, you sigh. “Okay, a little. If you wanted to hurt me - again - you’ve had a ton of opportunities. So I don’t think you want to. But…..”

“It’s a hard thing to get over.”

“Yeah. And not just you.” Hesitantly, you start to tell him. You want to just give him the basics, but once you start talking, you can’t seem to stop. He doesn’t interrupt, barely seems to blink, just watches you. A blank vessel to help you empty the poison that fills you sometimes.

You see his jaw tighten as you go on, but you know the anger isn’t at you.

When you finish, he’s silent for a few moments. Then he gathers you up to him. “I’ll never hurt you,” he says.

You look up at him with the same bland look he gave you a moment ago.

“Again,” he amends. “I’ll never hurt you again.”

You let out a watery laugh and he hugs you a bit tighter.

“You’re still a brat, though.”

[moldisgoodforyou]

florence (iv)

warnings: smut!! in the middle but you can see it coming if u wanna skip over it

wordcount: 8.3k

______

Six and a half hours and two transfers later on the train, Sophie and Rafe made it to Florence. They’d fallen asleep on each other multiple times and woken up with cricks in their necks or imprints of each other’s clothing onto their cheeks, and were both running on little sleep - somehow, he’d convinced her to go skinny dipping off a little cove at 2am the night before. She lasted about ten minutes in the water with him before she spotted someone with a flashlight along the beach and freaked, practically sprinting out of the water to pull her wet clothes back on and shove Rafe’s at him. (He’d hissed at her to relax until they heard yelling of “arrêter! Policiers!” They put together pretty quickly that it was “stop! Police!” and booked it back to the hotel, giggling the whole way.)

Despite Rafe’s tired grumblings, she made him freshen up and walk with her to go get dinner at a place a few blocks from the hostel. It was only 6, but they both hadn’t eaten in a while and had to be up early for an architecture tour Sophie had scheduled at 8am. He took two looks at the menu before handing it to her - she raised her eyebrows, skeptical. “You know what you’re getting?”

“It’s Italy. I want pasta every day.”

“Every day.” She repeated, doubtful.

“Every day. And gelato, every day. Those are my two requests.” He nodded, sure of himself.

“I think we can manage that. Did you learn Italian too over the summer, you want to order for us?” She teased, holding back a smile.

“C’mon, my Spanish wasn’t that terrible. It really wasn’t.” He protested, kicking her gently under the table.

She kicked him back reflexively, maybe a little too hard, and just rolled her eyes when he made a show of dramatically grabbing his leg. “It wasn’t awful. You just had zero accent, that’s kind of important.”

“Whatever, I’ll work on it.” He grinned. “You can teach me where to put my tongue.”

“Your ability to make anything sexual is impressive.”

“Wasn’t even sexual, but good job on you for twisting it.” He smirked, leaning across the table and lowering her voice. “Hey. Guess what.”

She did the same, reaching out and taking his hand. “What.”

“We’re in Italy.” He whispered conspiratorially, squeezing her hand.

“Yeah, and…?”

“When you were drunk on FaceTime once, you told me we needed to have sex in every country.”

She blushed, raising her eyebrows. “Did I?”

“You did, and I’m holding you to it. I got us single rooms in the hostels for a reason.” Rafe wiggled his eyebrows back with a smile, trying to get her to laugh. “But there’s like, a 98% chance I fall asleep on you if we try anything tonight, so we can check that off the list tomorrow.”

She had to hide a giggle as their waiter came over to take their order, turning it into a cough into her elbow. When the waiter left she shook her head, grinning. “Tomorrow’s fine. I appreciate the honesty.”

“Any time.”

_______

The next morning, Sophie woke up to her third alarm in a row with Rafe still blissfully asleep next to her, his arm curled around her middle and her leg thrown over his waist. She nudged her head up, knocking against his chin. “Hey.”

He stirred just enough to pull her closer and bury his face into her hair. “Shh. Sleeping.”

“We gotta get up, Rafe, we need breakfast before our tour.” She started scratching gentle circles on his chest, placing short kisses up along his neck. “Up.”

“If you keep doing that something else is going to get up.” He mumbled, humming contentedly with his eyes still shut. The hostel was busy with other kids their age and he’d woken up to the sound of two groups trying to open their door - twice - and their drunken whisper-yells. Sophie, of course, slept peacefully through the whole thing.

“We don’t have time for that.” She placed a kiss on the tip of his nose and tried squirming from his grip unsuccessfully. “Come on.”

“Five minutes.”

“Two.”

“Four.”

“...Fine.” She settled her head back onto the pillow, sighing as he grinned and nuzzled against her. “Only ‘cause you’re warm.”

“Yeah, what the fuck is up with the temps? This place is an icebox.” He replied, slipping his hand under her shirt and cupping her breast.

“Rafe.” She elbowed at him, a warning tone to her voice.

“M’ just holding it. You’re warm.” He argued, brushing his thumb over her nipple and smiling to himself when she let out a tiny whine. She made the mistake of pressing her hips back into him, just a little, and he groaned quietly into her ear. “Careful there.”

“You’re not seriously - oh my god, Rafe.”

He wasn’t embarrassed in the slightest, just pushed his hips against her ass. “Can’t help it. I have my beautiful girlfriend in my bed that I haven’t seen in months.”

“It wasn’t even that long -”

“It was a whole quarter of a year without you, Sophie, now hush and let me sleep.” His tone took on a teasing lilt and he brushed his fingers down her stomach, making her tense. “Unless you’d like to do something else.”

“We don’t have time.” She told him firmly, knocking his hand away. He grumbled and pulled his hand out from under her shirt, settling his arm around her waist instead. “Lame.”

“You’re lame.”

“Okay. Good comeback. You’ve lost your touch.” He quipped with a tone of amusement, pulling her close again. Her alarm went off and he sighed dramatically, dropping his head to her shoulder. “Let’s skip.”

“We’re not skipping, we might never be in Florence again and I’ve wanted to see the Duomo and Palazzo Vecchio for years.” She twisted in his grip just enough to place a quick kiss on his lips then sit up, stretching. “Get up.”

“I’ll bring you back - no, Sophie, stay -” He protested weakly, reaching for her.

She smiled fondly at the way he was all squinty in the mornings, adjusting to the lights and trying to find his glasses, but her smile gave way to a pout she knew Rafe couldn’t say no to. “Baby, please? I don’t want to be late.”

“Fine.” He yawned and dragged himself out of bed, pulled on his glasses and shoved his feet into sneakers, just wearing his boxers. “I’m gonna go pee.”

“You’re not gonna at least throw on a shirt? Or shorts?” She questioned, eyeing him over with no shame.

He caught her gaze and flexed his chest, smirking. “Not if you’re enjoying the show.”

“You’re the worst.” She informed him, leaning over to give him a kick to the ass. “Go.”

As requested, she pulled out his clothes for the day after she got ready, finding a certain kind of pride in the fact that he trusted her in his appearance. She grabbed his wallet from the desk too, ready to stick it in her backpack, but paused when she realized it was a little thicker than normal, barely snapping shut. Curiosity got the best of her and she flicked open the wallet, pulling out a couple wrinkled and worn pieces of paper from one of the slots.

Rafe returned just as she was smoothing it open. “What are you doing?”

She startled, quickly turning and holding the paper behind her back. “Nothing! Just putting your wallet in my bag. So we didn’t forget.” She clarified quickly, cheeks blooming red at being caught.

He smirked, kicking off his shoes and striding closer. “If you wanted money, you could’ve just asked.” He teased, reaching around behind her. “Whatcha got?”

“Nothing.” She twisted, trying to set it on the desk without him noticing, completely unsubtle.

“Oh. You found your letters?”

Sophie paused. “My letters?”

“Yeah, that’s what they are.” He nodded and started pulling on his clothes for the day.

She brought it from behind her back to read and brightened, realizing it was two scraps from the many letters she’d sent to him when they were apart. He’d just cut out the two sappiest paragraphs she’d written, embarrassingly, as she found it much easier to express the extent of her love for him through writing rather than face to face. She pouted a little, skimming over them. “Baby.”

He turned back to her and ran his thumb over her bottom lip, shaking his head. “Hm? No pouting, little fish.”

“Little fish?” She quirked her brow, confused.

“Yeah, remember that one time you blamed your crying during finals week on being a Pisces moon? Pisces is the fish, I think.” Rafe reasoned, taking the papers out of her hand and carefully tucked them into a zippered pocket of his suitcase. “Since you’re here with me now, I guess you’ll just have to tell me how much you love me in person instead.”

She beamed up at him, adoringly. “I love you so damn much.”

He grinned and slipped his hands around her waist, pulling her close to kiss her slow. “Love you too, Soph. My favorite girl.”

Fifteen minutes later, the two of them strolled out hand-in-hand to the hostel cafeteria and picked through some pastries for breakfast, Sophie promising him a protein bar from her backpack when he complained he’d be lightheaded by eleven. He snapped a photo of her when she recoiled at the strong cappuccino with zero cream or sugar to cut it with, laughing as she tried her best to hide a cough. They found a spot at an empty table and it wasn’t long until a friendly couple came up to them with twin smiles.

“Hi, can we sit?” The girl asked, already setting down their plates.

“Yeah, yeah, go ahead.” Rafe replied, gesturing. Sophie noticed that his slight Carolinian accent came out a little more in Europe instead of in Ohio, as if he was trying to mimic a little bit of the Spanish and Italian accents and butchered it in his own special way. (She hadn’t corrected him yet, finding it endearing.)

“Thank you! I’m Elena, this is Marco.” Elena introduced herself, sliding into her seat.

Marco gave them a nod and pointed at Rafe, hesitant. “It’s...Jake?”

“Rafe.” He corrected, then explained to Sophie, “we met in the bathroom.”

“Your boyfriend is built.” Marco informed Sophie with a grin, making her laugh. “I know. I’m Sophie, it’s nice to meet you both. Are you just visiting, or…?”

“Yes, we’re from Milan, we wanted to make a weekend trip.” Elena confirmed. “And you? Americans?”

“North Carolina, yeah.” Rafe nodded. “Sophie was studying abroad in Barcelona, then I came to tag along.”

“Oh, so cool!” Elena grinned. “Do you have plans today? I love Florence, it’s beautiful.”

“It is, yeah.” Sophie glanced down at her phone, then back up at them. “I’m sorry, but we have to run, actually, we have a tour to go to this morning. But no plans later.”

“We will meet you by the Duomo, then, around lunch! We can show you around.” Marco declared, handing over his phone to Rafe to put in his phone number - he was a little confused, but did so anyways. “You guys don’t have to -”

“No, new friends are always fun.” Elena waved him off with a smile. “Enjoy your morning.”

Sophie brightened, slipping out of her chair. “See you later!”

Rafe followed her back to their room, and turned to face her after shutting the door with a skeptical look. “He was flirting with me.”

She laughed, packing up her backpack for the day (she’d bought the little leather bag in Barcelona and it was now one of her most treasured possessions, carrying her camera and sketchbook every day). “Don’t be ridiculous, you just have a big head.”

“No, I swear, he was giving me a look this morning when I walked back from the bathroom.” He insisted.

“I think you’re misinterpreting things, he was probably confused that you were shirtless. They were friendly, we should meet up with them! New friends!” She grinned and slapped a protein bar into his hand, as promised.

He furrowed his brow a little but slipped the bar into his pocket. “How long do I have to share you for?”

“Rafe.”

“I’m kidding, I’m kidding.” He amended quickly, leaning down to give her a sweet kiss. “Ready to see your Domo and whatever?”

“Duomo, baby. And the Palazzo Vecchio.”

“Yeah, that’s what I said.”

“Uh huh.” She held out her hand with a grin. “C’mon, Florence awaits.”

He took her hand and raised it, guiding her into a twirl. “We certainly can’t keep her waiting, then.”

______

Rafe wasn’t sure he absorbed a single word of the self-guided tour. Twenty boring minutes in, he’d turned down the volume on his audio pack that they’d rented and just observed Sophie and the small look of awe on her face at every new turn, the way she nodded enthusiastically when she recognized a piece of information shared on the audio. He decided he would be perfectly content with just watching her for the rest of his life, to see the way her face lit up when she learned new things and got to share that information with him.

He listened just enough to be able to hold a conversation with her afterward, but his intro to architecture class that he’d had to drop midway through the first month of the semester didn’t really give him a strong enough background to keep up. Sophie made him pause the audio several times too, so she could tell him a story about the architect or about the construction of the buildings - he did his best to look as interested as possible. She could tell he was losing interest, just a little, but carried on anyways, just excited to share her passions with him.

After finishing the tour and returning their audio devices a little early, they took a seat out on the steps of the piazza as they waited for their new friends. Sophie took out her sketchbook and started drawing the front entryway of the Duomo, and after two minutes she ripped out a sheet so Rafe could doodle too. (His sketches were much less refined, a little rough around the edges, but they made up for it in character.)

“Do you think they’ll show?”

“Marco and Elena? Yeah. They sounded genuine.” She replied, her tongue poking out a little in concentration as she sketched.

He suppressed a grin and snapped a quick photo of her before she could realize. “How long do we have to hang out with them?”

She shrugged. “Dunno. Maybe go to lunch, let them show us around and if we like them we can hang out more?”

“Hm. You think we’ll like them?”

“Yeah, why wouldn’t we?” She reached over and adjusted his hand, trying to help him draw a straighter line, but he just scowled and went back to his usual method.

“We don’t know anything about them.”

“That’s the whole point of staying in the hostel, baby, to meet people.” She nudged her foot against his, giving him an eager smile. “C’mon, you like making friends. You’re good at it.”

“Okay, fine, but I have something planned for us tomorrow afternoon.” He told her, raising his eyebrows.

She huffed, exasperated. “Rafe, I promise, we can have sex later, but I’m not wasting the day in bed -”

He laughed, flicking at her knee. “No, no, not that, but I like where your mind is at.”

“Oh.” She cocked her head a little. “What is it?”

“A surprise.”

She narrowed her eyes at him. “Not an expensive one, I hope?”

He made a show of pulling out his phone, dramatic. “Siri, cancel the private shopping tour at Gucci please.“

“Rafe Cameron.” She fixed him with a glare, unamused. He grinned back and leaned over to kiss her forehead. “I know you better than that, don’t worry.”

“You’d better.” She rolled her eyes, then brightened when she saw Marco and Elena approaching and gathered up her sketchbook and pencils back into her bag, along with Rafe’s little drawings. He followed her gaze and stood, visibly steeling himself a little - she instantly nudged him to relax.

It didn’t take long for Rafe to warm up to their newfound friends, especially when Marco showed interest in his camera and when Elena asked him about his film minor, and enthused about how jealous she was that she couldn’t study something fun like that. He was a little caught off guard when they each got kisses on cheeks as a greeting, but didn’t mention it when Sophie shot him a look.

As promised, the two gave Rafe and Sophie a mini tour of the city, stopping for gelato twice along the way. After a solid few hours of walking and chatting, they stopped at a fountain by their hostel and sat around it to take a break.

“This fountain is special to us, you know.” Elena smiled at Marco and he nodded, tugging her down to his lap.

Rafe cocked his head. “Why’s that?”

“It is where we kissed for the first time.” Marco revealed with a raise of his eyebrows. “There’s a legend, if you throw a coin in here over your shoulder and it makes it to the top tier, you will find your lover.”

“Or lovers.” Elena added with a grin and dug in her pocket, then tossed two coins to Rafe and Sophie. “Here. I’ll tell you where it lands.”

Rafe tried handing his back, shaking his head. “No, I don’t want to waste your coin. I already have Sophie.”

Elena pushed it back into his hand, insistent. “You never know what will happen. It’s just good luck.”

Sophie looked a little confused but accepted the coin, tossing it in. Marco let out a whoop as it landed in the top tier, making a satisfying clink. “There you go!”

Rafe scowled but flicked his in too, looking a little smug when it joined hers up top. “See, I told you. Your lover’s right here.” He slipped his arms around her waist from behind, pressing a kiss to the top of her head, and mumbled, “Stupid fountain.”

Elena laughed, gesturing out to the crowd milling around. “Your lovers could be anywhere. Love is meant to be shared with more, yes?”

“...Sure.” Sophie leaned back into Rafe, content. “How long are you two here for?”

“We have as long as we’d like.” Marco shrugged. “Wherever the wind takes us.”

Rafe chuckled quietly into Sophie’s hair, murmuring. “Sounds like your worst nightmare.”

She just hummed in agreement back to him. “Oh. We leave in two days, early in the morning. Do you have plans tonight?”

“Probably a club.” Elena grinned. “You should come! We will teach you the tricks, get you the good Italian drinks. Sophie, I can show you how to flirt for the free drinks, the Italian way.”

She held back a laugh as she felt Rafe’s grip tighten a little around her. “Going out sounds fun. I’m not sure I have the right clothes, though, I sent a lot home already…”

“I have clothes! We will share.” Elena dismissed her immediately, then got up off Marco’s lap, tugging him up. “We are meeting with friends for dinner, but we will meet you later? At the hostel?”

“Sounds good.” Rafe nodded, letting Sophie go, and was surprised when the two of them said goodbye - again - with cheek kisses, Marco included. Once they were out of earshot, Sophie giggled at the bemused expression he wore. “I think you should start greeting James and Colin that way.”

He scowled. “James would participate. Colin might deck me.”

“Yeah, probably. I miss them.”

“More than you missed me?” He raised his eyebrows and she rolled her eyes, shoving at his chest. “Of course not. Don’t be weird.”

“I’m not being weird.”

“You are being weird, you get all overprotective and I know you wanted to say something earlier when she talked about flirting.” She took his hand and intertwined their fingers, giving it a little squeeze.

He softened a little and leaned down to press a kiss against the crown of her head, ignoring her remark. “What do you think she’ll have you wearing?”

“No clue. We’ll see, I guess.” She shrugged. “We have a few hours to kill, what do you want to do?”

“Hmm. We can go see the David?” Rafe tipped his head in that direction, and Sophie visibly brightened. “You want to go to an art museum?”

“Yeah, I’ve heard it’s cool. One of my buddies went last year and said it was worth checking out. Plus, air conditioning.”

“My two favorite words.” She grinned.

____

Later that night, Sophie walked out of the girls’ dorm with Elena to meet the boys, looking extra hesitant. She wore a black bikini top, maneuvered differently so it was upside down and strung up to push her boobs together, with an open back. One tug of a string and it’d all come undone. It was paired with a leather miniskirt and Elena insisted on doing winged eyeliner and soft pink lipstick too, all completely out of Sophie’s comfort zone.

Rafe’s eyebrows shot up and his jaw fell open a little. “Soph.”

“She’s gorgeous, yes?” Elena grinned, giving Sophie a little push on the shoulder toward him.

“Yeah, definitely, stunning.” Rafe nodded, searching her face. Sophie gave him a small smile, clearly uncomfortable in the attire. “It doesn’t look bad?”

“No! No, not at all. Do you like it…?” He questioned. “I can go get an extra shirt of mine from our room, if you want a little more, uh, coverage - not that you need to cover up, but -” He started, stepping toward that way even without her encouragement.

“No, um, I think it’s okay.” She grabbed his arm, stopping him in his tracks. “Just a little...different. I just need a drink. Or two.”

He paused. “You’re sure.”

“I’m sure.” She nodded, then gave him a wry grin. “Just make sure no one accidentally tugs at this string or I think it’s all coming apart.”

He clapped his hand against the string at the back of her neck protectively. “You got it.”

“Ready? You look nice, Sophie.” Marco asked, sending her a polite smile, then stopped in front of Rafe. “No, wait.”

“Something wrong?” Rafe frowned, then widened his eyes as Marco reached out and undid two more buttons on Rafe’s shirt that already had three unbuttoned, so his chest was basically on full display. His attire was completely out of character for him, a short-sleeved maroon silk button-down that Marco had insisted on, but he wore it well. Sophie stifled a laugh.

“There! Much better. Now we go.” Marco took Elena’s hand and they led the way, starting the walk toward the club.

Sophie giggled at Rafe’s bemused expression and reached over and undid another button with her free hand. “You look extra slutty tonight.”

“Extra slutty?” He emphasized in mock outrage. “Maybe I’ll be the one getting us free drinks.”

She grinned. “How about we make it a competition?”

“Go on…”

“Whoever can get to...um, two drinks first wins.” She decided.

“Just two? Why not go the whole night?” He cocked his head.

“I don’t think I’m going to drink too much tonight.” She reached up and tugged at the bikini string to tighten it a little, pushing her boobs together more. “I feel like my tits are gonna fall out at any second.”

He snorted. “Say the word and I’ll give you my shirt.”

“I know you would, baby, but I think you need some semblance of decency too.”

They were practically glued to each other’s side all night despite their bet, with her being stressed about her outfit and him being overprotective. (Sophie noted that Rafe looked remarkably comfortable in the overpriced and fancy club environment, while she felt wildly out of place. For a moment she wished she’d taken him to Monaco just to see how quickly he’d assimilate, even though she knew she’d probably hate it.)

They took two shots with Elena and Marco and lost both of them shortly after, not expecting them to leave so soon. After they said hasty goodbyes, not returning, Rafe slung his arm around Sophie’s shoulders and kept her close. “I’m pretty sure I just saw Elena making out with some girl on the dance floor.”

Sophie furrowed her brow, leaning into him. “You’re sure? Isn’t she dating Marco?”

He shrugged. “Dunno, maybe it’s their thing. I swear it was her.” He grinned, repeating Elena’s words from earlier. “Your lovers could be anywhere, remember?”

She rolled her eyes. “She’s a little out there. When we were getting dressed she dragged a crystal down my spine and told me I had to align my chakras.”

“Kinky.” He quipped, laughing when she shoved at his shoulder. “Whatcha thinking, want to stay?”

“Honestly?”

“Yeah.”

She shook her head. “I’m tired and my feet are killing me. Let’s just head back?”

He took the rest of her drink and tipped it back, then set it on a nearby counter as they walked out. “Exactly how tired are you?”

She grinned. “I could stay up for a little longer. I saw your packing skills, might as well put them to good use.”

Rafe blushed - she’d found a whole strip of condoms in his bag on the first night in Barcelona and immediately teased him, asking how many nights he thought they’d be doing it. He merely responded by shrugging and ripping one open, setting it on the bed like an invitation. (She had accepted. Of course she did.) “We might as well take advantage of your top. Easy access, y’know.”

She rolled her eyes and checked her hip against his, shaking her head. “You have me, you know. You don’t have to keep constantly flirting.”

“Where’s the fun in that?”

“Touché.”

_________

Rafe’s planned surprise for the next day was a bike tour (“so you can live out your Lizzie McGuire dream,” he’d told her, but she didn’t have the heart to correct him that technically Lizzie rode a Vespa in Rome).

The bike tour was out to a small winery where they had a private dinner and both got drunker than they expected, especially Sophie. The owners of the winery made them a three-course meal and kept coming out with more and more wines to try, successfully convincing Rafe to order three bottles to be shipped home. When Sophie nearly fell only a few feet after attempting to ride the bike back, the owners laughed and just ordered them a cab - Rafe thanked them with a tip that was probably a little too excessive, but his drunk brain didn’t care.

When they tumbled into the car, Rafe immediately pulled her feet into his lap, running his hand over her shin. She gave him a look and tried twitching away but he wouldn’t let her, keeping a firm grasp on her ankle. In Spanish, a little slurred but near-perfect, Sophie told the driver their address and the name of the hostel. Their driver nodded and responded something in Italian - neither of them could understand, so they just nodded back.

Rafe dug his thumbs into her calf and she nearly moaned, biting her lip. “Oh my god.”

“That good or you’re just drunk?” He smirked, continuing his motions.

She let her head flop back against the car door. “Both. You’re drunk too. My brain is working funny though.”

He raised his eyebrows, smiling. “I don’t think it is. What’s 15 plus 26?”

“Rafe, you know I can’t do mental math, unfair.” She whined, pulling her leg back a little so his hand slipped back to her ankle.

He swapped her legs, massaging into her other calf. “Not gonna take your shoes off in the car, sweetheart, you’ll have to wait for more.”

“Sweetheart. That’s new,” she repeated, mulling it over. “You know what?”

“What?”

“If you gave me a foot massage right now, I genuinely think I’d marry you on the spot. No contest.”

“No contest implies there is competition, Soph.” He pushed both her legs off his lap, ignoring her squawk of protest, and slid into the middle seat so he could buckle her in and lean into her.

She tucked her head into his side comfortably. “You’d marry me too. Wouldn’t you?”

“Right now?”

“Yes.”

“Hm. No.”

She whined, squeezing his thigh. “Rafe!”

“Sophie!” He mimicked her whine, although much quieter, and pushed her hand away from his leg. “No, I wouldn’t, you deserve a big party and a pretty white dress. Plus, wouldn’t you want our friends there?”

“I suppose.” She hummed, pulling his arm a little tighter around her shoulders. “Sometime, then.”

“Yeah, sometime.” He agreed, starting to play with her hair. It wasn’t long until she fell asleep on his side, always extra sleepy when she was wine drunk. He snapped a picture and sent it to Allie and Julia, who instantly demanded a Facetime session.

A few minutes later, the cab dropped them at the hostel and Rafe had to practically drag her sleepy body out of the car and haul her inside. He convinced her to stay awake just long enough to get into their room, then let her flop onto the bed as he untied her shoes.

She perked up a little when she heard the familiar ring of the Facetime call. “Who’s that?” He scooted in close to her, pressing his cheek to hers to fit them both on the screen with minimal effort. Allie and Julia picked up right away and both their faces broke out into a grin.

“Mom and Dad!” Julia exclaimed.

Sophie grinned back, immediately taking the phone from Rafe and shoving him away. “Hi!”

“She’s drunk.” Rafe informed them unnecessarily off screen.

“I am not, shh.” She snapped at him. “Hi guys! I miss you!”

“How’s your trip? I want to hear all about it!” Allie asked right away.

Sophie glanced at Rafe, the wheels turning in her head. “Should we tell them? Are we allowed?”

He furrowed his brow. “Why wouldn’t we be allowed?”

“Okay. So we had sex last night -”

“Jesus, Sophie, no -” He immediately wrestled the phone away from her as Allie and Julia both cried out with a chorus of “no, stop!”

“You said it was allowed!”

“I didn’t think you were going to talk about that!” Rafe rolled his eyes and gave them an apologetic smile. “We’ll be home in a little under a week, Soph can catch you up then. On the less explicit details.”

“You taking care of our girl, Cameron?” Julia asked, smiling as Sophie nuzzled into his side like a cat - she was always extra touchy when drunk, even just with the girls.

“Technically, she was mine first.” He pointed out.

“Technically, you made her cry after multiple fights before you ever dated, so no. She’s been ours since freshman year.” Allie corrected.

“I can be everybody’s.” Sophie mumbled, taking Rafe’s hand and placing it on her head so he’d get the hint and start playing with her hair again.

“Polygamy. Spicy.” Julia quipped.

“I would like to have sex or go to sleep now.” Sophie announced without a care in the world. “Can we hang up?”

Julia snorted, while Allie rolled her eyes.

“You’re not gonna talk to your friends?” He asked, trying to hand the phone back to her, but she just shook her head and pushed it away. “M’tired.”

“You just said you wanted to have sex.” Julia said.

“Yes, I’m not gonna do any of the work.”

Rafe shook his head and angled the phone back to his face. “Okay then. Sorry, guys, we had way too much wine at dinner. We’ll see you soon?”

“Yeah, of course. See you soon! Bye, Soph!” They both chimed in, waving until they hung up. He dropped the phone, amused. “What was that about?”

“Honesty is the best policy.” She told him, sprawling out onto the bed. “Alright. Have at me.”

He rolled his eyes. “No. You need to shower, then we can go to sleep.”

She sighed dramatically. “Rafael.”

“That is not my name.”

“Okay. Rafe.”

“Yes.”

“Can we please have sex?”

“No we cannot.”

She pouted, rolling over onto her stomach and looking up at him. “Please? I’ll let you go down on me.”

He laughed. “You’re so generous. No. Come on, shower time.” He gathered up her towel and clothes for her to change into after, then tugged at her hand. “Angel. Up.”

“Shower with me.” She demanded, getting up and following him out the room with only a few stumbles along the way.

“You want us to get kicked out? I don’t think so.” He ushered her into the small shower stall, slipping in behind her and locking the door, then helped her undress, dodging multiple kisses. He folded her clothes and set them aside then gave her a small push into the shower that he’d turned on for her. “Okay. I’m going to wait outside.”

“No, no, stay.” She yelped as the water hit her, ice cold, and fiddled with the handles. “Fucking - oh my god -”

Rafe quickly jumped forward and adjusted them to the right temp, then turned his back on her. “Fine, I’ll stay, but only because I’m worried you’ll drown.”

“Can’t drown in a shower, silly.” She reached out and shoved her soapy hand through his hair and he sighed, turning back to look her in the eye. “Sophie Flint. Please behave.”

“You behave.” She gave him a mischievous grin, then lowered her voice to a whisper despite there being no one else milling around in the bathroom. “Come in.”

“You’re drunk.”

“Not completely. Not anymore.” She argued. “I’ll go down on you.”

He laughed, shaking his head. “If you really want to, you can save that for the morning. Finish your shower so I can get in. I’ve decided I don’t trust you to stay alone in the room.”

“Or you could get in with me…” she trailed off, tugging him down for a kiss - he gave in just for a moment before glancing away, trying his hardest to ignore his naked girlfriend - wet and covered in soap suds, no less.

“Soph. Rinse your hair.”

She crossed her arms, stubborn. “No.”

“Oh my god.” He rolled his eyes and double-checked the lock before he stripped down and got in with her, nudging her back under the feeble shower spray. He figured he’d have to shower anyways, and the faster he got her back to bed, the better. “Rinse.”

“Do it for me.” She protested, resting her head against his chest. He sighed but tipped her head back into the water and massaged his hands through her strands, stilling for a brief moment when she let out a breathy moan. “Hey. Can’t do that.”

“Sorry, can’t help myself.” She excused, then reached up onto her toes to lather shampoo into his hair once he was finished. He ducked down a little so she could reach, pressing his head against her hand. “M’ gonna be hard if you keep that up,” he mumbled.

She giggled. “It’s just shampooing. And I think you’re halfway there.”

“It’s intimate.” He protested, nearly melting into her touch. He loved when she played with his hair, how gentle she was (except when she’d occasionally tug on some strands to get his attention).

After shampooing and rinsing his hair, she lathered soap between her hands and smoothed it over his chest, over his shoulders. He swallowed, watching her and feeling like his skin was on fire despite the warm water waning. “You’re still drunk.” He mumbled.

“Not really.” She pressed a kiss to his neck, then another, then along his collarbone. “I know what I’m doing.” His illogical side was beginning to give way to her actions, especially as she sunk to her knees in the shower, running her hands down his thighs. “Let me.”

“Baby…” He was hesitant and clearly worried about being caught, and reached down to tip up her chin. “You’re sure?”

“Yes. Although this is twice now that I’m getting cheated out of shower sex, kind of rude.” She grinned up at him.

“Sophie, I will fuck you in the shower all you want when we’re home - oh, shit -” He nearly gasped as she took him into her mouth, jerking his hips involuntarily. She gagged and immediately pulled off him, pinching his thigh. “Jesus, Rafe, trying to bruise my throat or something?”

“I had no warning! I’m sorry!” He exclaimed in a hushed whisper, fumbling for the shower faucet to turn it just a tad hotter as it rained down on his back. “I didn’t mean to, I swear.”

“I mean, we can try it, but another time, okay?” She smirked as his eyes went wide and she licked up the underside of his cock, carefully taking him into her mouth again. He let out a deep exhale and bit down on his knuckle to keep himself quiet, letting his head fall back against the shower wall. She continued bobbing up and down on him and when he looked down after a few moments, he nearly choked watching her touch herself at the same time.

“Sophie - let me -” He tried, but she just hollowed out her cheeks and moved on him a little faster, and he could tell from the way she hummed around him that she was close too - impossibly close. He pushed her gently off of him and hauled her up to stand, even though she protested, and traded places faster than she could think, hooking her knee over his shoulder and going straight in with his tongue.

She gasped, a little louder than intended, and he sent her a warning look. They could hear some giggles from down the hall, coming closer and closer, and she panicked, tugging at his hair to bring him up, but he refused to stand. “Be quiet.”

“Rafe you know I can’t -” She pleaded, then pressed her hand tight to her mouth when the door opened and he continued to eat her out with no sign of stopping. Realistically, there was no chance of getting caught unless they were heard - they were in one of four locked shower stalls and even Rafe couldn’t be seen over the top, despite his height. Another gasp caught in her throat as he flicked his tongue across her clit, faster, and she felt like she might black out when she came.

He looked up at her and she could barely see the blue rimming his pupils, eyes dark with lust. That was enough to push her over the edge and she couldn’t stop herself from letting out a not-so-quiet whine.

The girls’ conversation stopped out by the sinks and one of them spoke up, loudly. “Did you hear that?”

Rafe stood after working her through the orgasm - as always - and clamped his hand over her mouth, reaching down in between them to jack himself off as he whispered in her ear. “Don’t make a sound. You’re so good for me, Soph, so fucking special.”

She felt like her legs were jelly and her head was spinning, in a haze post-orgasm (and the excessive steam in the shower didn’t help). She pushed his hand away and kissed him, hard, grinning against his lips when he uttered a soft groan, painting her stomach with his cum.

He rested his forehead against hers, trying his best to breathe quietly, a different girl spoke up. “No, I didn’t hear anything. Probably just the shower faucet being weird.” There was a murmur of agreement and the group left, the door swinging shut to make a loud exit.

Sophie let out a small laugh of disbelief, shaking her head. “You’re…I can’t even think.”

“Incredibly sexy?” He supplied with a grin, nudging her back under the shower spray and handing her the body wash to clean herself off.

“Incredibly insane, more like it.” She shivered once she was clean and flicked off the faucet. “You went from no sex tonight to near-exhibitionism all within the span of a half hour.”

He glanced at his watch before wrapping her in her towel. “Forty-five minutes since we’ve been home, actually, it’s a miracle the water wasn’t ice.”

She patted herself dry and pulled on her clean clothes, scowling as she had to shove her feet into her mildly sweaty shoes. “Um. You need fresh clothes.”

“Right.” Rafe paused, then stacked his clothes on top of hers and wrapped her towel around his waist. “This’ll do. You leave first?”

“Good call.” She grinned and slipped out of the bathroom unnoticed, back to their room, and was under the covers when he returned. “C’mere.”

He tugged on clean boxers and called it good, slipping under the covers with her and drawing her close. “Sleepy?”

“Yeah.” She grinned to herself and pressed a chaste kiss to her jaw. “Baby.”

“Hm?” He closed his eyes, feeling like he could fall asleep at any second.

“You’re so easy.”

“Easy?” He echoed. “Maybe. Just for you.”

“Aw. Slutty just for me.” She grinned and rested her head on his chest, sighing contentedly when he wrapped his arms around her. “Good night.”

“Night, love you.” He mumbled.

“Love you too.”

_____

After another long day of exploring (and five gelatos, between the two of them), Sophie and Rafe agreed to meet up with Marco and Elena to go out again before they left. Rafe insisted on buying Sophie a better outfit for going out, despite her protests, and they ended up buying three outfits instead of just one. The night started out tame, with Marco and Elena actually sticking by Sophie and Rafe - until Marco kept buying more and more shots of limoncello and sambuca.

The sambuca shots came to their table on fire, and Rafe was a little too enamored by the flame by the third round he’d consumed (Sophie passed hers off to him, a little worried about her ability to keep an eye on him otherwise). When she noticed Rafe’s terrible typing on a Snapchat to Colin and James, she leaned up to yell in his ear. “Hey! I’m going to go get water. No more shots.”

“I’ll come!” He got up from his chair and immediately stumbled, gripping the table. Marco caught him by the arm, laughing. “I can watch him. It’s okay.”

She nodded and pressed both hands to his shoulders to keep Rafe in place. “Okay. You stay here with Marco, I’ll be right back, baby.”

“Promise?” He frowned, reaching out for her.

“I promise.” She pressed a kiss to his temple. “Stay.”

After fighting her way up to the bar, and poorly communicating that she wanted acqua, water, not acqua di cedro, an Italian liqueur, Sophie finally made it back to the table after ten minutes - just in time to catch Marco leaning in and kissing Rafe.

Rafe had leaned in a little too, misreading and thinking Marco was just trying to tell him something in his ear over the loud crowd. He jerked away with wide eyes just so Marco caught the corner of his lips, then abruptly looked around in shock to see if anyone else caught it.

Marco cocked his head, confused. “You are not interested?”

Sophie came up and handed Rafe the water, tucking herself into his side protectively. “What’s going on?” He gaped at her for a second then back at Marco, trying to gather his thoughts. “Interested?”

“In me.” Marco nodded. “We have been flirting.”

“We’ve been what?” He repeated, in shock.

“I’m his girlfriend.” Sophie clarified, gesturing between the two of them. “I thought we told you -”

“Yes, and I have my girlfriend too!” Marco nodded, tapping Elena on the shoulder and bringing her close. “What is the issue?”

“Oh, did you ask?” Elena brightened, sending Sophie a flirtatious grin. “Did they say yes?”

“I’m too drunk for this.�� Rafe mumbled, pressing his palm to his forehead.

“Wait, wait, so. You two want to hook up with Rafe -” Sophie started, only for Marco to shake his head. “No, no, both of you. You for Elena.”

“I thought you could tell? We were flirting all week!” Elena exclaimed, and both Sophie and Rafe thought back to several incidents over the past few days that they’d just chalked up to the Italians being friendly. Kisses on cheeks, Elena telling Sophie to toss coins in the fountain so she’d meet her lover in Florence, Marco complimenting Rafe’s body multiple times when he came back in just a towel after the showers - shit, were they really that oblivious?

Rafe just groaned and dropped his head down to Sophie’s shoulder. “I’m so drunk.” She laughed, more out of confusion than anything. “Um, I’m sorry, I think there’s been a misunderstanding. We’re not really inter - well -” She paused, debating for a moment and glancing up at Rafe to make sure she wasn’t speaking for him. (In her defense, she wasn’t sober either.)

“No!” Rafe exclaimed.

She nodded quickly. “Right, right, yeah. We’re not really interested, I’m so sorry if we gave you the wrong idea.”

“Oh. I would not have kissed you, I am sorry -” Marco began to apologize, but Sophie shook her head. “It’s okay! It’s okay, he’s fine. Um, here, you can have these, I think I need to get Rafe back home.” She pushed their waters into Elena’s hands, giving them an awkward smile.

“Will we see you at breakfast?” Elena asked as she smiled back, completely unfazed.

“Um...yeah. Maybe. Rafe, c’mon, let’s go.” Sophie looped her arm around his waist and tried pulling him out of the club, and he just dragged his feet along. “I can’t believe he kissed me.”

“Shh,” she giggled as she hushed him, tugging on his arm. “Rafe, cooperate, please.”

“I’m trying, I’m trying.” He grumbled, standing slightly more upright and doing his best to walk with her once they finally made it out. She got out her phone to look up the directions back to their metro stop and he wiped his hand over his mouth, scowling. “I need a kiss.”

“You nearly got one from Marco.” Sophie quipped with a smirk.

“I didn’t want a kiss from Marco.” He lamented with a big sigh. “Need one from my girl.”

“Just one, then we gotta make it home.” She complied, rising up on her toes to give him a short kiss. He grabbed her chin, not so gently, and tilted it back up to give her another kiss. “No. More.”

“I’ll kiss you as much as you want when we get back. Will you please help me and walk to the metro? One block, then just two when we go to the hostel. You can do it.” She pulled out of his grip and looped her arm in his, trying to get him going. “Rafe. Please.”

“So whiny.” He mumbled, but followed along. “Sophie, baby, Soph.”

“Yeah, bud?”

“My legs feel like jello.”

She grinned. “Kissing Marco had you that weak-kneed?”

“Shut uppppp.” He whined, messing with her hair. She jerked away, swatting his hand. “Hey! Quit.”

“You quit.”

“Shut it.”

He was quiet for a solid minute and she could tell he was thinking something over, with the way his brow was furrowed and lips were pursed. “Sophie Flint.”

“Yeah?” She was grateful when they arrived at the metro, tugging him onto the empty car and scanning their tickets. She wrestled him into a seat and eventually ended up on his lap after some pushing and pulling, his forehead pressed to hers. “What, Rafe.”

“Were you gonna sleep with Elena?” He looked concerned and his hands gripped her waist a little tighter.

She laughed, pulling back to brush his hair out of his face. “No, baby, I wasn’t going to sleep with her. I didn’t even know that’s what they were trying for.”

“Oh. Good. I don’t think I’d like you sleeping with someone else.” He told her, closing his eyes a little as she combed her fingers through his hair.

Sophie held back another laugh, nodding. “Yeah? I didn’t think you would. Don’t fall asleep on me, buddy.”

“Boyfriend. Not buddy. Buddy’s just a friend. I can have other nicknames too though.” He argued, letting his head fall back against the metro walls.

“What other nicknames?” She asked, moving to get off his lap, but he just tightened his grip on her so she couldn’t.

“Hm…I’m okay with smokeshow.”

She snorted, nodding. “Alright, smokeshow. We can go with that.”

“Sophie.”

“Yes, Rafe.”

“I’m in love with you.” He declared, leaning forward and placing a kiss to the bridge of her nose. She beamed and leaned in too to bump her nose against his, then press a short kiss to his lips. “You’re very sweet when you’re drunk.”

“I need you to say it back.” He frowned, tugging gently at the ends of her hair.

“I’m in love with you too.” She grinned. “Adore you, even.”

He hummed, looking her over with concentration and a small smile. “I like the sound of that. Do we have to go to breakfast tomorrow? I don’t really wanna see them again.”

She laughed, shaking her head. “Our train to Rome is at seven, I was kind of hoping they’d be too hungover to remember us.”

“Hostel breakfast doesn’t open til 8.” He frowned. “Am I gonna starve?”

Sophie rolled her eyes and nudged her nose against his. “No. I’ll make sure you get food.”

“You’re so good at taking care of me.” He smiled sleepily, pulling her closer and dropping his head to her shoulder.

She beamed, combing her hand through his hair. “I try my best, baby. Always will.”

taglist: @whoeveniskendall @kkmaybank @karsinner @outerbanksbro @outerbankspreferences @randomficsandshit @jailcalledlife @tovvaa @moniamaybank @illbesafeforyou @dontjinx-it @freddymaybank @jjmaybankzz @g4bster @oopsiedoopsie23 @babygal-babygal @thecuthoney @babeyglo

[koshicoast]

A few shinkami headcannons because I love them more than anything

Shinsou has a growth spurt and practically towers over Denki by their second year (for all intents and purposes, Shinsou has always been in class 1A)

Denki grows a little bit but not that much, he’s not complaining though, he gets Shinsou to grab stuff on the top shelve for him or has him hang up posters in higher places in his room (the only downside is that he has to get on his tippy toes for kisses but usually Shinsou will just bend down like a good boyfriend)

They go on dates every Sunday, It’s their day and it doesn’t matter what they’re doing as long as it’s just the two of them

They could be studying or doing homework or exercising or anything really and they’ll call it a date

The rest of the class knows better than to try and contact either boy on Sunday

“Normies worship Jesus on Sunday but I worship Shinsou” - Denki, at one point in time

Shinsou loves playing with denki’s hair, he buys different kinds of hair clips just to put them in denki’s hair

he just likes how the colors pop out

He especially likes to see purple hair clips in denki’s hair

Tbh it doesn’t have to be hair clips, it could be a scrunchie or a rubber band or a headband; as long as it’s purple it does wonders to shinsou’s heart

Denki likes playing with shinsou’s hair too but more than that he likes seeing Shinsou in yellow clothing

Shinsou doesn’t wear bright colors a lot usually sticking with black or cool tone colors

But when he does wear yellow, Denki just gets all mushy no matter how small it is

It could be yellow earrings or socks or something and Denki will wear a love sick expression all day

Despite being in the hero course, Shinsou still gets incredibly insecure about his quirk and how some people only see him as a villain

Denki, without fail or hesitation, tells Shinsou what a great hero he’s gonna be, he talks about how Shinsou is gonna inspire a new wave of underground heroes and how he’s gonna be some kid’s Aizawa one day and how proud he is of him (The first time he said that, it makes Shinsou sob. It makes denki cry too bc he’s a sympathetic crier so they just lay in bed holding eachother)

He also tells Shinsou how no matter who’s the number one hero, Shinsou will always have first place in his heart. And that Shinsou is just as much as any other hero out there and even a little more because he’ll be underground

Denki just loves his boyfriend so much and whoever planted the idea that some quirks are just made for evil is going to get electrocuted >:(

Denki will also pepper Shinsou in kisses saying things like ‘you are so kind’ ‘you’re an amazing person’ ‘I love you so much’ ‘You’re my hero’ and just a bunch of stuff so by the end of their heart to heart Shinsou is feeling a lot better

Denki gets insecure about how ‘dumb’ he is and how he’ll probably just end up hurting civilians or himself before he hurts a villain

Shinsou hates how that’s how Denki views himself because Denki is one of the kindest people in the world and doesn’t even realize it like the first time Denki told him that insecurity, Shinsou looked at him and was like ‘are you..you’re serious? Denks, You’re one of the most clever people I know’

Whenever Denki mentions it, Shinsou he just squeezes the blonde and lets him cry out his frustrations before telling him that ‘he’s not an idiot or stupid and that it’s okay not to understand something as fast as others and that it’s okay to learn differently and it’s okay’ (Shinsou will always try not to cry but a few tears fall anyways bc he just wants denks to be happy without feeling like he’s a fuckup)

Shinsou never lets Denki call himself an idiot or stupid, even in a joking way.

They don’t fight a lot because of their personalities like

Denki is a people’s person and is really in tune with other’s emotions and by default is a pacifist unless otherwise

Shinsou isn’t a people’s person but he’s observant due to his quirk bc of how he’s been treated in the past, he’s also good at picking up on people’s body language

Most times it’s just small disagreements and even then they communicate the best they can and try to compromise

If that doesn’t work then they’ll give each other space so the disagreement won’t turn into something ugly

They’ve only fought once and it was the worst (and best) thing for them

The fight happened after a mock rescue mission goes wrong and there were weeks of stress and tension leading up to it

It was messy and bad like really bad

“I just don’t get why you have to run into danger!” Denki screamed. The whole dorm could probably hear them but he didn’t care, not when his boyfriend was looking at him like he just lost his mind.

It was supposed to be a simple training exercise. Simple. Go in, defeat villains, rescue the ‘hostages’. It was not that simple.

*insert how badly the mission went and Shinsou ran towards the danger to help or smth idk*

It gets pretty rough between the two of them because they’re both pretty emotional people

Shinsou thinks denki doesn’t want him to be a hero and denki thinks Shinsou doesn’t want to be with him

It’s a lot of insecurities + stress + yelling

Denki is the first one to break, he’s a lot more emotionally sensitive than Toshi and everything is just crashing down and he hates it

“Do you just not want to be with me?!” He cries, unable to keep the tears at bay any more. He hates arguing with people, especially when that person happens to be his boyfriend. He gets it, he does! Toshi is training to become a hero and so is he but that doesn’t make it easier. Doesnt stop the shot of fear whenever he watches the other get hurt, doesn’t stop the late night self deprecation, doesn’t stop the anxiety he gets whenever he sees Toshi run head first into danger.

But he gets it and somehow it’s a bitter realization.

Because Hitoshi’s priority is the job they signed up for and Denki’s is Hitoshi.

The fight ends with tears on both their parts and they call it a night, too tired to scream anymore

They sleep in their own rooms that night

The next morning they agree to take a break, not a full break up, but some time away. Space away from each other to prioritize and think.

(Now ive seen fanfics where everyone picks denki over Shinsou and i hate that so fuck you, class 1A are both their friends and they’re all family and try and to help each other I will die with that statement)

Surprisingly the two most helpful people are Bakugou and Kirishima

(Actually not that surprising, they’re the longest couple in the whole class, dating immediately after Kamino)

Bakugou and denki have a heart to heart

“You’re both dumbasses” Katsuki sighs heavy, passing another tissue over to the sobbing blonde. He’s not good at these kinds of things, but Kirishima told him he could help the electric blonde more than he could so here he is. “You gonna tell me what’s wrong or just cry?” He asks, not without a hint of worry though. He pretends to ignore it.

So denki tells him everything and his insecurities

Oh. Yeah, Kirishima was right.

“You think I’m an idiot” Denki mutters quietly, harshly rubbing his eyes.

“No” The older blonde shakes his head, plopping down on the bed next to the other. He doesn’t turn to meet yellow eyes, his own trained on the All Might poster hanging directly across from them. He feels Pikachu’s curious gaze on him so he decides to elaborate more, knowing the sooner he helps the sooner he doesn’t have to deal with this anymore. It’s totally not because he’s gotten soft. Absolutely not.

“Trust me, Zombie Eyes looks at you like you put the fucking stars in the sky. It’s disgusting to watch.” He crinkles his nose in disgust earning a small laugh. “People like him and I, we gotta work twice as hard. Not saying that no one else does but it’s different.” He stresses the last word. “People like Ei or Deku or even you, people already see you as good so all you gotta do is get stronger. They don’t question your character, your morals, they don’t look down on you for having a weakness. People like Zombie Eyes and I though?we gotta work hard just to prove that we’re good. That we were meant to become heroes. Every action we do is put under a microscope and analyzed.” He explains.

“We’re assholes by default, It’s how we were raised. Not saying it as an excuse though. He was in the shitty system and I had shitty parents, no adult taught us shit like love or how to properly deal with feelings.”

Stupid Deku tried with him but he didn’t even know how to deal with his own much less some angry blond kid’s.

He takes a deep breath, pushing back faint memories of his childhood. The younger hasn’t said a word but he can tell he’s listening so it’s fine. “We can’t just turn off how we are. If it’s frustrating for you and Ei, It’s worse for us. Like we know logically that we’re good people, that we changed but that’s now how our brain sees it. We push ourselves because that’s all we know how to do, it proves to us and everyone else that we bled for our spot here. That we made it. Having friends is hard because we compare ourselves to them and draw our own conclusions to their actions. Being nice? Our brain says it’s a trap. Showing some human fucking decency? Our shitty brain says it’s an act. Being in a relationship? Laughable. We’re just villains pretending to play heroes to everyone else.”

He takes another deep breath, forcing himself to look away from the poster, flashbacks to their first year briefly passing in his head. Okay yeah, not going down that route. He looks over, making eye contact. He wonders if this is how Kirishima feels whenever he’s trying to cheer him up. Wonders if it’s just as hard. This better be worth it, everyone has been miserable. (Shitty thing about having been through life and death situations together is that everyone has bonded and become close like a family so when one of them is sad it’s like everyone is fucking sad.) (He loathes it because even he gets worried.)

“But despite that he still loves you.” He says softly, almost whispering like he’s telling the other a secret. “Fights his demons to hold your hand and all that shit”

Shinsou loves him? Loves him?

“How do you.. how do you know?” Denki whispers, throat sore. “We fought so badly last night, we were screaming at eachother.”

“He treats you the same way I treat Ei.” He answers,

“He changed his priorities around to try and accommodate for another person in his life, you became more important than training or studying. He takes days off to be with you, cuts his studying short if you need a break. It might not seem much to others but for him that’s huge. He came in with this one track mind but then you came along and he scrambled to balance everything. And then you two got your shit together and started to go out and I’m pretty sure he got scared”

“Scared?” Denki asks, the thought almost funny to him.

“I did.” Bakugou admits as Denki’s eyes grow wide.

“I was petrified. When Ei started to become more important than hero work, I freaked. It’s not that loverboy is choosing being a hero over you, It’s because he doesn’t understand that he can have both. He thinks everything important is a choice- that if you want something you have to give something up. He chooses hero work and he loses you. He chooses you and he loses hero work.”

“But he’s not going to lose me or hero work”

“Kinda sounded like you did give him an ultimatum though”

The realization hits him like cold water.

Shinsou gets a similar talk with Kirishima

It helps, a lot

They don’t immediately go back to eachother, instead spending the week with their everyone else and just taking time for themselves

Shinsou knocks on Denki’s door Sunday morning and they finally talk things out

It’s also the first time they say ily!!

Anyways after that fight they work harder on communicating especially when it comes to things like hero work

It’s not perfect bc their dumb traumatized teens but they’re trying and they know their lil family will always be there

I haven’t slept but yes thanks for sticking around if you’re reading this

If ur interested in shinsou’s talk with Kirishima lmk

[forthefriends2021]

che

i hope you know how much you are worth che i know ive said this a lot of times che and i dont know how much more i can say this to you to make you feel it din for yourself without any hesitation or doubts. I know after what you have been through it may not be as easy to take those words and accept it. But it is safe to say that for the amount of time probably almost two years na even che that I have known you, I have really seen nothing but purity in your heart. You are beautiful inside and out che and i hope you really acknowledge that din within you che i hope someday you will no longer need to seek anyones validation and approval che because the greatest approval you could provide for yourself is from yourself talaga che i hope someday you will learn to love yourself twice as much as how you show your love towards other people din che. invest in yourself for now bbche and believe that someday when the time is right and when you are really ready that special someone for you will also come na din che. wag na magwaste time sa mga temporary people and contentment che kasi sayang lang yan sa precious energy mo save and reserve it for the right person okii. you are so precious to me che honestly and i really wanna see you be happy pow with or without someone che i hope you will really be there bbche. ily :< God bless always che and please always remember that we is always here for you pow just supporting you in everything that you do basta hindi lang karupukan bebeb HAHAH i trust you naman din che and i know you already know what you are doing but in times when you are unsure of anything just dont forget that there is a God up there always ready to hear you and guide you or us your friends that is always here for you lang anytime :>> loveyoubbche :>

[heizerux]

About Stormy Weather 2

Let’s cut to the chase. This was a filler/recap episode.

Is it disappointing? Yes 😞

They did my girl Aurore wrong with the episode title and not even giving her the attention she deserves. And about nothing new happened. Chloe still hasn’t learned to actually be better. There’s more. But those are about a few things that REALLY got to me (to be brief).

Is it bad that they even have this episode? Not exactly. It just wasn’t done well.

Now that I’ve briefly got out of my system on why I was disappointed, now let’s look at the details and minor brightsides of it (I guess?) and more on why I’m disappointed.

.

This was an episode to establish the questions we’ve had. (Honestly did we even need these? Actually, not really. But it’s nice they even bothered.) Some of these questions are:

How’s Aurore?

Is Chloe really fully changed?

How does Nathalie REALLY feel? Like with her own words? How LONG has she been with the Agrestes? And will Gabriel keep this shit up?

How’s the dynamic between Ladybug and Chat Noir now since they’ve been fighting for a while?

How’s everyone else (Alya and Nino specifically) doing?

Will Marinette ever tell Adrien that she’s interested in him?

Will Adrien pick up on that???

Pretty much here’s how they answered these, as well as what I took from these answers:

How’s Aurore? Naturally I’m gonna open up with Aurore here since this was supposed to be HER episode again. We see her being bullied by Chloe and then she get it’s gets to her. THAT’S how Aurore is doing. The only few things I liked about her here is learning she and Marinette are friends. But that’s IT. This could have been HER moment. HER episode again. We could of known more about HER. Instead what do we get? Just like 3 minutes tops of her and boom. Defeated, and not even checked up on. I know she’s a side misc character but damnit *slaps table*. . . We really were cheated with her comeback. This wasn’t her episode and it shouldn’t have been titled “Stormy Weather 2”. I’m sad about this.

Is Chloe really fully changed? Nope. So I knew her development wasn’t even started yet (as we’ve seen), but like damn. We see how being hero twice has gotten to her head. It’s disappointing, it really is. The only “bright side” is that at least they’re establishing here that she clearly still has changing to do instead of saying she’s fully changed, which she isn’t. Probably even alluding to what we’re gonna see next with her. Obviously by that last glare, Marinette (as Ladybug) isn’t giving into her shit anymore. (That or she’s disappointed in how Chloe doubled back too.)

How does Nathalie REALLY feel? And so we see. She, as expected, hates her fucking job because it’s too demanding, but LOVES the Agreste family. We now, with her own words, which are rare, learn just how long she’s been with them, her feelings for the family, and that she canonically cared for Emilie and has now fallen for Gabriel. She’s also still sick from Heroes Day (so they didn’t forget that’s a thing, thankfully). Which now only implies that from this point forward, she’ll be Mayura more often, and get even sicker (a life for a life, anyone?)

How’s everyone else doing? That Ninalya (Djwifi) content. . . My heart! 💕💖💕💖😭💖💕💖💕 So they show us Nino is pretty much now a Césaire (lol), and that they both do talk about their hero duties when they’re alone. The good in seeing this? They can actually keep it a secret from the public and this shows their hero potential (unlike Chloe). The bad about it? It’s their disadvantage (as we already know.) Now what we didn’t need is all that recap footage. (That time slot could have been used for my bby Aurore 💜💙💜)

How’s the dynamic between Ladybug and Chat Noir now since they’ve been fighting for a while? Well :) (Filler aside) We see that Ladybug is A LOT more fonder of Chat Noir than before. This time she’s loosening up her humor during battle when she used to be all “stop joking! This is serious!” Then they go on to recap on shit that we already know like that they trust each other and *yawn*. But one thing I did notice, and like about this, is that look she gives him as he runs off.

It’s almost a look of that says “I’m starting to view you as more than a partner. . .” (Will they show it in the following episodes. Boy do I hope.)

Will Marinette ever tell Adrien that she’s interested in him? Okay so not only does she drop off Adrien’s homework, but you notice something? Not only did she volunteer, but she didn’t fluster while doing so. When she delivers it, she’s not panicked about it, instead she’s just nervous about talking to Nathalie and disappointed she couldn’t give it to him in person. Then what happens next? She FINALLY takes Kagami’s advice and does something. Once she’s done, she’s not regretful and doubtful about it anymore when she used to be. Sure, we went over shit that marks she “changed”, but it’s really around this part in the episode that she ACTUALLY changes. From here she’s a new confident Marinette, pretty much. The recap was still unecessary.

Will Adrien pick up on that??? *sigh* no lol.

Okay, real quick, BIG APPRECIATION for Plagg’s “Oh shit” face when he sees Adrien notices the handwriting.

So into Adrien and his love life, we see that his head is too in the clouds to fully notice the amazing girl that is MARINETTE. I will say I love that Plagg keeps trying to steer him in the direction to LOOK AT MARINETTE. (Mentioning how Gabriel wasn’t mad Adrien was with her when he snuck out and hinting that she’s VERY available more than once.) When he finally notices the handwriting, he’s SO close to putting it together. Plagg for a sec is shook about it (since it hints he’s closer to piecing she’s LB), but then he re-tracts because he’s a clueless child and now is left on the conclusion that it’s not her. Okay -_-

So now that that’s done, let me just add on why I think that last part where he retracts marks something.

.

Anyone find it odd that the episode ended specifically with Adrien noting that “Marinette couldn’t have written the letter (can’t be in love with me) because she’s just a friend that’s into fashion. Besides there’s Luka.”

Luka. . .

. . .

You guys hear that?

Right as soon as he says that, sad music plays. Like he “lost” something.

Then Adrien as if slightly disappointed, insists it was probably “someone else”. . . Because there’s Luka. . .

And then the episode ends.

(My own thought: I think this is here to mark off that not only Luka is coming more into play, but maybe that it’ll affect Adrien more than he thinks? It may be that his change to come is that he stops looking “up in the clouds” and starts looking in front of him.)

.

haaaaaAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!

.

And that’s about one of the few things that got me in this episode (among Nino and Alya and Mari getting confident for once). Because it means shits gonna get interesting among the ships👀. . . *sips tea*

.

I’d touch the development issue but after carefully going over the fact that both season 2 and 3 were written around the same time, I do have a hunch stuff is kind of out of order there. But that’s a topic for another day. (Probably one I’ll rethink and retouch fully after this season is done.) So let’s get back to the real question:

So wtf was this episode?

.

Well, this is just my take, but judging by the brief glances at Stormy Weather 2’s LEVEL of power, it’s there to set what we’re gonna be seeing from the episodes forward. If this looks intense, then we haven’t seen intense, yet (ya feel?)

.

For certain ppl (I’m one of these ppl) Stormy Weather from S1 was THE pilot episode to the whole show and the first episode seen. It set up what we were going to be seeing of the show. So if there had to be an explanation, my take is that’s why they picked her again to mark off a recap and brand new starting point for what’s to come.

.

TLDR: This episode probably wasn’t just meant to show what’s changed, but to mark of what WILL change moving forward.

.

It’s not perfect, I’m still not happy with how it was delivered, but that’s probably what they were going for.

.

They probably should of just called it “The Story So Far” or something, honestly. Not Stormy Weather 2. Aurore did amazing. Her screentime didn’t :( But in the end, it’s probably there to mark the start of real change.

.

Since that’s maybe the deal, then changes we may see here moving forward and so on are:

.

It’s probably gonna mark Marinette as being comfortable around Adrien and no longer hesitating as much as she did, but of course Luka will be more in her life (and Adrien may or may not realize he isn’t as okay with it?? That’s just what I wanna see honestly lol). Chloe will probably realize that she can’t keep expecting to be handed a miraculous just because she says so, which then could mark her to ACTUALLY start changing. And so on.

.

Anyway we’ll see what the next episodes bring. I noticed they’ve only been showing us the uneventful episode first and leaving the more “juicy” ones for later dates. . .

As long as this is, I actually kind of rushed through it so my apologies if it’s all over the place :(

[dauntless-dragayn]

nobody asked for it, but i liveblogged my She ra s3 reactions

[ part one ┊ part two ]

spoilers, obviously (under cut bc it’s rather long)

episode one

DAMN THEY DID NOT HESITATE TO DIVE RIGHT INTO SHIT

(oh yeah this is a split season so that makes sense..)

FUCK SHADOWEAVER FUCK SHADOWWEAVER

Angela loses points for not having a proper prison but gains them right back for not letting Adora in to interrogate Shadowbitch

Glimmer: we shouldn’t let her manipulate you

Adora, immediately: //decides to manipulate / trick her friends

Side note, interesting episode title..

Adora’s friends: //arent fooled at all THANKFULLY

adora honey youre a terrible liar. and your friends are too smart

Catra bby..

SCORPIA BBY

Catra: i cant handle this emotionally vulnerable shit

GOOD THEYRE WATCHING ADORA

Aaand theyre asleep

Oh this is great

Glimmer’s target practice cjdhjdnf

Oh Adora wants to change Shadowbitch.. honey.

GLIMMER IS WITH HER GOOD

ANGRY GLIMMER !!!!!! PROTECTIVE GLIMMER !!!!!!!!!

God Adora calling out Shadowbitch is everything

LET HER DIE

DONT HEAL HER

GDI

YOU CANT TRUST HER

Fuck this is cool

Shadowbitch’s two reasons for (SUPPOSEDLY) turning is to get revenge on 1) Hordak and 2) Catra While im sure Adora is all behind the first one, she certainly wont let the second happen.

Okay but who SENT Adora through that portal??

“Don’t I get a say in what happens to me? Don’t I get a choice?!”

:’0

The worst thing about this is that LightHope is basically telling Adora the same thing the Horde did: you dont have a choice over your life, your ambitions, your responsibilities. Fuck LightHope.

“It is happening again.” HM

“Are you okay?” “I’m not sure yet.” baby.. i felt that

episode two

What a COOL shot of Adora

Fjejhd of coUrse Glimmer didnt tell her mom

Poor fucking Angela

Ive never related to Bow more in this moment ⁃ bird ⁃ Trying to navigate whEN FUCKIG GOOGLE MAPS ISNT WORKING- coughs i mean, the navigator machine

Oh shit Hordak cares about Entrapta

ADORA PUTS HANDS AROUND HER EYES IN PLACE OF BINOCULARS SKFBFJFNMC

“Just act tough” oh yall are so bad at this

its Her time

I just watched this clip of Huntara last night

Adora is gay

Huntara is also gay she was just FLIRTING with a WOMAN at the BAR

 The ‘purposefully gets names wrong’ gag will always be my favorite

ADORA’S ~TRYING TO BE SMOOTH~ VOICE IS HILARIOUS BUT ALSO.. 👀

 anybody got a map? oh wrong show sorry

listen i cant blame Adora how could you NOT be in love with her

OH SHIT WE CAN SEE HORDAK WITHOUT HIS ARMOR

Ugly ass twink bitch

Adora getting an outside perspective on the war and how it effects Etheria should be interesting

Wait where are Glimmer and Bow ?

Adora being called “blondie” 👌👌

ADORA WANTING TO IMPRESS HUNTARA ️‍👌��️‍🌈✨

Oh theyre there they just fell behind

Huntara led them into a trap didnt she

Gdi

Oh she took Adora’s sword fuck I mean ofc she did but mm That would be her only chance of escaping

HORDAK HISSING AT ENTRAPTA DKDJF

Okay Entrapta is a top

Hordak is a clone?? Bitch what

//falsely sympathetic voice/ aww hordak just wants to impress his higher up with planetary conquest..

they even called this expedition a roadtrip awe

Wow theyre really playing up this Hordak + Entrapta friendship and bonding huh

Oh Glimmer is such a badass

ADORA JUST FUCKING TACKLED THIS WOMEN WHOS TWICE HER SIZE TO THE GROUND

Bow: awkward HAH of victory

Glimmer: sticks her tongue out at the enemy

God i love this battle sequence so much

THE MUSIC!!!!!

Im watching it again

Adora’s laugh before she says “I AM She ra”  😍

Theyre both ex Horde soldiers oh shit!! One so trusting and one so fearful, so closed off to anyone

“I’m not gonna run anymore. I face my problems head on.” fuck yeah!!!

Netflix referring to Bow Glimmer and Adora as the “squad” omg

-rewatching the fight scene from 18:30-

diD HUNTARA JUST ROAR LIKE A LION?!

I love the repeating of lines to each other thats such a good trope too

“Thats mine!” ”Then come and take it.”

Also I like seeing Adora fight and pull off really cool moves but not like, flawlessly. Like her backflip- she almost falls. Or when she swings Huntara’s sword and it doesn whip out at first.

HUNTARA JUST ROARED AGAIN

ANOTHEr EXAMPLE OF THEIR MIRRORING IS WHEN HUNTARA HOLDS ADORA’S HEAD UP WITH HER SWORD AND THEN SHE RA DOES THE SAME

Thats totally foreshadowing the connection of their backgrounds with the Horde huh

The “‘You know about She ra?’ Heheh, I AM She ra” moment is so good okay I need to call it out again. The way she flashes her sword in front of her face? Amazing. Spectacular. Im gay-

The end of this episode be like: //women supporting women

Mara’s ship!! Dun dun dunnn 

episode three

Edgy Catra in the Crimson Waste shot: ✔️

“Nothing matters anymore!” :(

Hey that place looks familiar!

Isnt Scorpia FROM here?? How does she not know anything about it??

“Maybe I should have skipped force captain orientation eh?” THIS RUNNING JOKE DKFNFK

Catra bitching about Hordak is a whole mood

CATRA HISSING AT THat FROG THING SHE PUSHED FROM THE COUNTER IM-

Wait satyr lady never said the second rule Prettyyy sure the second rule is that no one annoys Huntara, but shes not here! So what the hell are YOU gonna claim it is?

Catra’s monologue in the bar is everything

Catra stealing the jacket is such a ME move i see a leather jacket i go feral

Bow you’re such a nerd ily

Well duh the ship is empty its been looted for years

Do your She ra thing i bet thatll uncover something //wiggles eyebrows

Yeehaw! Look at that i was right

Its not haunted theres a repeated message echoing ..

Scorpia you’re gay

Also IM gay Catra in a jacket is 👌😩

HER ORDERING PPL AROUND AT KNIFEPOINT IS 👌👌👌😩

 Aw look at Scorpia in her element

“Im gonna call you Kyle” KDHFKDJFJFK

Catra’s little smirk.. ️ ❤️️ Scorpia’s reaction is a whole mood

THEY DO MAKE A GOOD TEAM! ITS A GOOD THING SCORPIA FOLLOWED YOU HERE INTO EXILE H U H CATRA

That giant skull tho

OH ITS TIME IVE SEEN THIS CLIP

announcer voice: ITSSSSSS TONGUELASHOR

listen i know he’s an idiot with a dumb name and catra kicks his ass but i love me a buff lizard person,,

a broadcast.. oH ITS MARA HERSELF

“And I am gone.” sounds like.. something someone would say in a message if they didnt want to be looked for and found

Adora ... :(

Your frustration is so warranted

I wish i could give her answers

OH SHIT ITS MARA BUT NOT SHE RA-ED THIS TIME

“I was supposed to be the last.” wh..

Even Tongue Lashor’s insults are dumb

SCORPIA INTERRUPTING TONGUE LASHOR IS PRICELESS

HE EVEN SAYS “WHIP” KDHFJ

Catra mimicking his evil laugh..

Listen imma say it again (my scalie is showing) Tongue Lashor’s design is great

Catra just winked at Scorpia, yoURE GAAY

 @ Mara’s dialogue.. that was uh. A Lot The biggest thing that jumps out to me is the fact that theyre in an empty dimension?? And the fact that Mar BROUGHT A WHOLE PLANET there. Thats some real power. Oh yeah, and LightHope is lying / working against the She ras / wants to bring destruction to the planet. But thats not surprising

Oh hey darts! Now who took the dart gun..

oh thats right!

Catra and Adora time baby

 HEY ADORA

Adora is uh,, alone captured by Catra

This should be interesting

SCORPIA IN THE JACKET THOOOOO

“A toast to Scorpia” //clutches chest

Hey yall this is cute but reminder that cattadora is endgame

“When we go back” nahhh

Also fuck Catra heard that hologram??

CATRA BLUSHIG

“We could rule the Crimson Waste together!” Scorpia you are SO gay

“I have to go check on the prisoner” her ex

“Shadow Weaver left me for you..?” Uh fuck

She has tears in her eyes oh bby

I cant believe im already halfway through the season jfc fuck split seasons

(part two is up now!)

[oldmyths]

oh shit y’all i got tagged by @wimpydemons and @spookyboybergara, thank u both for tagging me :’)

Rules: Answer these 85 statements about yourself, then tag 20 people.

last

1. drink - coke!

2. phone call - my nephew, i think i called him to turn off the oven ot smthn

3. text message - that i sent? i said hi to someone who asked for my number. my most recent received message is from that person asking me if i’m ok with calling some time to discuss some stuff in my english class

4. song you listened to - wait by the beatles

5. time you cried - hm... i don’t...remember

ever

6. dated someone twice? - god. yeah.

7. kissed someone and regretted it - never been kissed

8. been cheated on - no???

9. lost someone special - yeah

10. been depressed - still there but uh i think i’m better at managing it

11. gotten drunk and thrown up - i don’t drink y’all

fave colours

12. YELLOW

13. blue

14. a light purple

in the last year have you…

15. made new friends - absolutely!!!

16. fallen out of love - uhh. maybe

17. laughed until you cried - yes

18. found out someone was talking about you - no???

19. met someone who changed you - hmmmm yes

20. found out who your friends are - i. guess so?

21. kissed someone on your facebook friends list - no

general

22. how many of your facebook friends do you know irl - most of em, i only add close irl friends/family on facebook

23. do you have any pets - a cat!

24. do you want to change your name - :)

25. what did you do for your last birthday - umm. nothing special

26. what time did you wake up today - 7-ish in the morning, my cat really wanted breakfast

27. what were you doing at midnight last night - i think asleep? i don’t remember. i was really tired yesterday lkfgjdsfk

28. what is something you can’t wait for - Well i just watched the new ep of unsolved so... nothing right now. OH black panther. and spring break

30. what are you listening to right now - not a god damn thing

31. have you ever talked to a person named tom - i don’t know any toms i think. i know a thomas but he’s my uncle and i haven’t seen him in a while

32. something that’s getting on your nerves - cringe culture

33. most visited website -  fuckin tumblr i guess

34. hair colour - its..brown? ombre-ish maybe. i don’t know i hate my hair

35. long or short hair - it’s a lil below my shoulders god help me

36. do you have a crush on someone - i love my girlfriend

37. what do you like about yourself - MY TEETH!!! and my eyes. and the fact that i make people laugh sometimes

38. want any piercings? - nah

39. blood type - i..don’t know

40. nicknames - truthfully i don’t think i have any

41. relationship status - i love my girlfriend

42. zodiac - sagittarius babyyyyy

43. pronouns - they/them

44. fave tv shows - i like twin peaks and criminal minds..those are the only tv shows i really watch i think

45. tattoos - i don’t have any right now but i do want to get a tattoo of some lyrics on my wrist bc i’m a typical walking fuckin cliche

46. right or left handed - right handed babyyyyyyy

47. ever had surgery - nope

48. piercings - i had my ears pierced when i was a wee child but i took em out since my ear got infected, and then i haven’t bothered trying to re-pierce them or whatever

49. sport - i like volleyball, soccer, and hockey i guess? i only played volleyball in high school. i’m not very athletic

50. vacation - one summer, after i graduated high school, my mom, my sister, two of my nephews, and i drove to the quebec border. just cos. and then we went back home

51. trainers - ...shoes? i wear boots, because canada and snow. i do have these other non-winter boots that are like, cat-patterned and theyre yellow and i love them but my sister doesn’t let me leave the house with them. and these space-themed converse hightops that don’t really fit my tiny feet

more general

52. eating - nothing

53. drinking - not a dang thing

54. i’m about to watch - i might rewatch the new bfu

55. waiting for - black pantherrrrrrr

56. want - sleep?

57. get married - i’m a sagittarius. my parents are divorced. every relationship i’ve been in was a disaster.

58. career - i want to publish books...realistically i’d probably just work in a bookstore or something

which is better

59. hugs or kisses - ive never been kissed and i’m extremely selective of those i allow to hug me...so.....nneither? kisses?

60. lips or eyes - eyes

61. shorter or taller - ..taller...

62. older or younger - older

63. nice arms or stomach - ehhh arms i guess

64. hookup or relationship - i love my girlfriend

65. troublemaker or hesitant - hesitant bc i don’t think i could handle even being friends with someone who’s constantly acting/being a troublemaker. too much stress

have you ever

66. kissed a stranger - no bitch

67. drank hard liquor - no bitch

68. lost glasses - not for a long period of time but i have lost my glasses before

69. turned someone down - yea

70. sex on first date - no bitch

71. broken someones heart - ya

72. had your heart broken - ya

73. been arrested - no???

74. cried when someone died - ya

75. fallen for a friend - i mean. aren’t you supposed to? isn’t that kind of the best way to really fall for someone? when you look at someone who’s been beside you and you think “oh, there you are”?

do you believe in

76. yourself - err.....

77. miracles - i think karma has some credence to it. you get what you put out into the universe, and such

78. love at first sight - not really

79. santa claus - i believe in santa in the way that he was a real person at one point

80. kiss on a first date - um... that’s subjective i think

81. angels - shane madej exists. so yeah. (i have a hard time thinking about deities and angels and demons, because if you blieve in ghosts doesn’t that kind of set the stage for an “afterlife”? does an afterlife without a god exist?)

other

82. best friend’s name - i have too many you can’t make me pick just One. fuck you

83. eye colour - hazel i think

84. fave movie - fuck you. i love reservoir dogs, the shining, toy story, the adventures of tintin, psycho...

85. fave actor - jake gyllenhaal is the only man i trust

i tag @izzystradlinsyellowpants @demonproofboi @shyaniacs @anyhornyboys @delightedbythunder @heytheredemyons @ghosts-boys umm and anyone else who might wanna do this?

if i tagged u and u don’t wanna do this then please please please don’t feel obligated to do it!

[heyekiel]

Many Questions Tag

rules: answer these 85 statements

tagged by @th7thsense thank u i love u !!

THE LAST

1. drink: tea 2. phone call: mom 3. text message: it was sephora jfbjfbn 4. song you listened to: ludovico einaudi - questa notte (this dude awesome check him out if you like classical) 5. time you cried: yesterday night? 6. dated someone twice: when i was figuring things out 7. kissed someone and regretted it: yeah i kinda regret everything but also dont cause i know better where i am now 8. been cheated on: nope 9. lost someone special: yes 10. been depressed: yes 11. gotten drunk and thrown up: not sure if it was related but yeah

3 FAVORITE COLORS

12. black 13. white 14. deep deep red

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU

15. made new friends: yes, i made a few here on tumblr !! bless yall ily 16. fallen out of love: nah love as yall hear it is a forreign concept to me 17. laughed until you cried: yup (thanks sis) 18. found out someone was talking about you: yes? i dont know? 19. met someone who changed you: nope 20. found out who your friends are: dont have friends 21. kissed someone on your facebook list: no

GENERAL

22. how many of your facebook friends do you know in real life:  lol you rly think im gonna go count 23. do you have any pets: yep, i got 9 cats at the moments and farm animals (too much to count soz) 24. do you want to change your name: yes, it’s planned,, dont really know the legal proccess yet but,, its planned 25. what did you do for your last birthday: ate cake with m mom and sis and the twins i think? then went back to studying lmao 26. what time did you wake up: 6:30 27. what were you doing at midnight last night: crying lmao 28. name something you can’t wait for: death 29. when was the last time you saw your mom: when she dropped me off at the train station last night 31. what are you listening to right now: nothing im watching elijah and christine 32. have you ever talked to a person named tom: my cousin named thomas does that count? 33. something that is getting on your nerves: lol myself 34. most visited website: tumblr, yt and the uni webmail 35. hair colour: dyed black, natural brown 36. long or short hair: i have rly short hair like mark short? they used to be waist long lmao i cut everything at the same time 37. do you have a crush on someone: im ace/mostly aro 38. what do you like about yourself: my right hand nails hsbvsvjhfj (no but my eyes are rly pretty) 40. blood type: b- 41. nickname: my sis calls me ya (from mydead name) but @zhonqchenle calls me ez and thats it i have no friends lmao 42. relationship status: still ace/aro 43. zodiac: scorpio 44. pronouns: sigh genders,, but they/them (i dont mind he/his cause theres no neutral pronouns in french but,, the first im more comfortable with i guess) 45. favourite tv show: teen wolf is my shit ngl, sense 8 (still gotta see season 2), and bad guys (thats a drama guys check it out its a police dark serail killer one stuff shit i love it its so good) 46. tattoos: thats planned,, but im broke rn we’ll see later lmao 47. right or left handed: right handed 48. surgery: kidney stone removal (fucking drink guys that is NOT fun) and other stuff are planned for later 50. sport: i did artistic gymnastic for like 9 years, i danced for a while (i did modern, hip-hop, classical), i did natation i did a bit of aikido (im not sure thats how you write it thats a martial art),, but i dropped everything in the end (i do a bit of boxing tho) 51. vacation:  rn? lmao im in uni and we broke 52. pair of trainers:  addidas i think,, theyre from last year

MORE GENERAL

53. eating: nothing 54. drinking: also nothing 55. I’m about to: study lmao thats all i fucking do 56. waiting for: the sweet release of death 57. want: learn to compose (have the time time for it who am i kidding) 58. get married: nope (id marry a friend tho lmao) 59. career: dream job? producer. actual job? i don’t now, either psychiatrist, comportementalist, legist, sound engeneer (i cant speel this fucking word i give up) ?

WHICH IS BETTER

60. hugs or kisses: both (kisses dont mean romantic love to me id kiss a friend on the lips i dont,, care) 61. lips or eyes: both bitch 62. shorter or taller: it doesn’t matter to me idc 63. older or younger: also dont care 64. nice arms or nice stomach: what does nice mean lmao,, i dont really care 65. hook up or relationship: sigh 66. troublemaker or hesitant: both leaning over the first

I realized this was dating question kdfbjkdb LMAO so,, this is bout anyone im comfortable with jbkjbsjvsd /rly close friends and shit/

HAVE YOU EVER

67. kissed a stranger: dont think so 68. drank hard liquor: lmao yeah 69. lost glasses/contact lenses: yeah but i found them 70. turned someone down: yeah 71. sex on the first date: i knew the dude but yeah 72. broken someone’s heart: yeah i guess 73. had your heart broken: yeah 74. been arrested: i dont get out my bed kjsbvss 75. cried when someone died: yes 76. fallen for a friend: thought i did,, ended up ruining myself

DO YOU BELIEVE IN

77. yourself: no lmao,, my ability to get through shit by really impulsive decisions?? yes 78. miracles: depends what you mean by that,, i guess it case by case 79. love at first sight: yall gotta stop putting your whole life and heart and trust in someone you know thats how you get murdered fucking stop 80. santa claus: stop what if kids see this 81. kiss on the first date: dont care none of my buisness,, it becomes if one of my  friends gets hurts or i witness someone get hurt 82. angels: why not gotta believe in something (im the angel i am ;))

OTHER

84. eye colour: lOL theyre really weird but really pretty ive never seen it anywhere else ?? theyre bleue on the outside and turn grenn/grey-ish, then brown/gold ish in the middl its fucking wild istg. i didnt know what to put for the passport lmao (also pics dot take all of the colors?? thats a lil weird too idk rly) 85. favourite movie: imitation game,, enders game,, i forgot one i dont remember?? im tired

tagging: @jenolees @zhonqchenle @safetypillow

[capsoff2]

The One Where Ed Gets Shot

Morgan’s POV(POV for entire story)

I’m just relaxing in my room in Mount Justice, when Red Hood starts calling me on my communicator. I pick up. “Yeah Hood? What’d ya need?”

     Jason’s face is serious as he replies, “Riddler’s been shot.” My blood immediately goes cold and my voice goes an octave higher when I reply.

     “What?”

     “He’s been shot.”

     “By who? When? Where? Why?”

     “We’re still working on a blood test of blood found at the scene. He was shot about 10 minutes ago on 32nd street. We don’t know why.”

     “Where is he? What’s his condition? Can I come and see him?”

     “We’re at Gotham General Hospital. We persuaded the staff to help, only the few decent ones there know. He’s in critical condition but alive. Yes, you can see him.”

     “I’m on my way.”

     “Alright, and Shadow?”

     “Yeah?”

     “Don’t do anything rash.”

     “I won’t.”

     “Alright. Red Hood, over.” He cuts out and I take a shaky breath. Ed’s been shot. One of my brothers has been shot(not biological). I pull on my costume quickly and walk to the zeta beam. I beam to one of the ones in Gotham and check my coordinates before programming my bike to arrive at them. It arrives a minute later, and I climb on, not bothering with the helmet. I’m going to go to GGH, but first I have a stop to make, and a friend to pick up. I pull up outside of a shady looking bar. I barely glance at the sign above the place before walking to the door and knocking harshly. I stand next to the door and when a man opens it I grab him and hold a gun to his head. “Be smart and fetch your boss, would you, and I mean the boss? Don’t say he isn’t here, I know that’s not true.” The man nods, frightened, and goes inside, pulling the door closed behind him. A few minutes later the door is thrown open by another man. This time, I relax a little at the sight of him. Still looks like the man I met him as. Tall, lanky, strange nose, and—I grimace at the realization, upset, the limp.

     “Yes?” He hisses to nobody, before looking around for someone. I take the opportunity to surprise him.

     “Oswald,” I say plainly, watching him jump before fixing his gaze on me. His scowl breaks up and he smiles a little.

     “Shadow. So good to see you again. You know you’re always welcome at the Iceberg Lounge.” Seeing my expression, however, his face falls a little. “Is something wrong?”

     “Ed’s been shot Oswald,” I say, my voice cracking a little. I watch as his face slowly morphs into one of hurt and anger.

     “What?” He hisses. “By who?”

     “We still don’t know. Right now he’s at GGH. Critical condition. Figured I ought to tell you. I’m heading there myself, thought you’d want to come.”

     “Of course I do,” he says. He turns and snaps his fingers twice. “Tom,” he says, catching a man’s attention. “Watch over the lounge while I’m gone. Anything goes wrong and you will be punished. Do I make myself clear?” The man nods and hurries away. Oswald turns back to me. “Is this really happening?” He asks, his tone showing his hope that it’s not.

     “I’m afraid so,” I say, walking back towards the motorcycle. He follows me. 

     “Do you have a spare helmet?” He asks. I nod and pull out a little square, he raises his eyebrows at it but I press a tiny button and it expands into a helmet that looks like a penguin(because why not). Oswald takes it and looks at it for a moment before strapping it on. I climb on and he climbs on behind me. 

     “Hold on.” I say. “Tightly, we’re gonna go fast.” He nods and wraps his arms around me. I rev up the motorcycle and we speed off into the night, Oswald’s grip tightening when he realizes how fast I meant. We arrive at Gotham General in a few minutes, and I dismount the motorcycle, with Oswald shakingly climbing off behind me. He takes off the helmet and hands it to me, and I press the button again and watch it shrink back into a square, and put it into the small compartment on my motorcycle for them. I then program the bike to go back to the Batcave, and it speeds off. We then walk towards the doors, and they open and shut behind us. We walk up to the reception desk and the man looks up briefly before doing a double take. I look at him calmly and state, “Hello. We were wondering which room the Riddler is in.”

     He stares at me and then at Oswald, before saying shakily, “He’s in room 215 A. Please don’t hurt me.”

     “Sir, we aren’t here to hurt anyone, but we would greatly appreciate it if you would refrain from calling the cops,” I say, sighing, and he shakily nods. We walk briskly(or as briskly as Oswald can) towards the elevator. We get in and I press the button marked “2.” The elevator rises slowly and when it reaches the top we walk out and into the hall marked “Rooms 211-220.” I look towards the left wall with the “A” rooms. 209—212—214. I pause in front of the door marked “215 A.” Oswald stops beside me and I take a deep breath and open the door. Inside is a sight that I didn’t expect: Batman, Nightwing, Red Hood, Red Robin, and Robin are all standing, facing the door. I stop with Oswald behind me. Well, this just got a little more complicated.

     “Hey Shadow, wondering when you’d show up,” Red Hood says.

     “Yeah, I had to stop and pick up a friend,” I say, and cautiously, Oswald steps out beside me. Immediately Red Hood reaches for a gun and Robin reaches for a katana, but they hesitate when I raise my hand.

     “Shadow, what is he doing here?” Red Hood inquires, tension evident on his tone.

     “He’s an old friend of Ed and I,” I state simply, shrugging my shoulders. They relax a bit, and I ask, “Speaking of Ed, how is he?” They shuffle around a bit and I hear a sharp, nearly silent, intake of breath from Oswald. I know how he feels, my heart feels like it’s twisting. “He’s not dead, is he?” I ask tensely. Batman shakes his head.

     “As Hood told you, he’s in critical condition. He suffered multiple gunshots, one of them punctured a lung. It’s a miracle he didn’t die,” he says. I inhale sharply at that. A punctured lung? Miracle he didn’t die? Those are bright red bleeding flags. Hell not flags, banners. 

     “Any results on who shot him?” I demand.

     “We don’t have anything yet, but the tests should be done soon,” Batman says.

     “How many times was he shot?”

     “5 times: one to the lung, one to the hip, one in each leg and one in his left hand.”

     “How were you able to deduce that the blood you’re testing wasn’t Ed’s?”

     “We saw the event unfold and saw the Riddler pull a knife out and get the man once in his gun arm. It left a trail when he ran away. Very short, but we managed to get a sample.”

     “What do you plan to do with Ed after he recovers, and don’t say Arkham?”

     “Shadow——”

     “No Batman, Edward isn’t getting thrown back in that hellhole right after this.”

     “He’s a threat.”

     “In this condition he’s not. 5 gunshot wounds, Batman. Those guards will eat him alive. These things take time to heal, mentally and physically. Trust me, I know. There has to be someplace he can go. Or better yet, just let him go back to his apartment. Ed’s a smart man.”

     “.....”

     “.....”

     “We’ll discuss this at another time.”

     “Bat—fine.”

     “.....Well the boys and I are going to head back to base. If you need anything, contact one of us.”

     “Will do. Batman?”

     “Yes?”

     “Thank you for not leaving Edward to die in the streets, it is greatly appreciated,” I say, Oswald nodding at what I said to show his gratitude.

     “I may hunt criminals, but I won’t leave them to die in the streets. Goodnight Shadow. And Penguin?”

     “Yes, Batman?” Oswald asks confidently.

     “Make one wrong move, and I can’t guarantee that you’ll have all your teeth intact.”

     “I’m not heartless, Batman. I wouldn’t harm my fa-friends,” Oswald states sharply, clearly offended. Batman just closes the door behind himself. Oswald and I are left alone in the room. Well except for Ed. We exchange glances before walking farther into the room, and Oswald slowly pulls away the curtain that separates Ed from us. I gasp a little at the sight. I had expected Ed to be in pretty bad condition, but I underestimated it so much. He has an oxygen mask on to help him breathe, with multiple IVs hooked up to him in various locations. His usual fairly pale complexion has lightened until he’s almost as white as a sheet. His eyes are shut with the glasses removed, and his face is screwed up in obvious discomfort. A hand flies up to cover my mouth as I feel tears begin to prick at the corners of my eyes.

     “Oh Ed,” I breathe in a whisper, placing my hand carefully on his head. Out of the corner of my eye I see Oswald coming to stand beside me, placing his hand on Eddie’s shoulder. We stand like that for a few minutes, before I receive a message from Red Hood.

Bold is Jason and non-bold is Morgan

Shadow.

What?

We’ve got a match from the blood test.

Who?!

It’s from a man named Charles Gaines.

What!? Oh, well that’s just great.

You know him?

One of Joker’s few identified henchmen. 

That sick bastard ordered this?!

Most likely. Think this is some sort of trap or something?

Could be. You should probably alert Penguin to this, and Riddler when he wakes up.

I plan to. Hood?

Yeah?

You won’t get mad if I hug or sleep in the same bed as them, right? Nothing romantic, it’s just a family thing.

No, I won’t get mad. They’re your friends. So what’s the deal with you guys anyway? You called them family.

Long story short, we bonded when we were younger. You know what I mean?

Oh yeah, before that whole huge thing that I still don’t understand.

So yeah, we’re pretty much family.

Ah, makes sense.

What does?

How you guys reacted. I’ve honestly never seen Penguin look worried.

Yeah, he’s a pretty stone faced guy on the outside, but more emotional with close ones. So, mainly just Ed and I.

Yeah.

Hood?

What?

One more thing, that I want to tell you.

Sure, fire away.

When me and Penguin go and hunt down this guy, you stay away. I honestly don’t care about your whole hatred of the Joker with this. This is Penguin and me, only. Relay the message to everyone. Do I make myself clear?

Sure, completely get it. Anyway, I’ve gotta go.

Alright, bye.

Bye.

I close the message feed to find Oswald looking at me curiously.

     “Who was that?” He ask curiously.

     “Hood.”

     “What’d he say?”

     “They got a match on the blood test”     

     “What?! Who?!”

     “A man named Charles Gaines.”

     “Who’s that?”

     “One of Joker’s men,” I hiss out. He scowls at this.

     “Joker? That psycho did this?” he hisses from behind gritted teeth. I nod my head in affirmation. “Well, we’re getting revenge, correct?” he inquires coldly. I laugh at that, a sharp, humorless bark.

    “Damn right we are,” I reply, eyes flashing dangerously, a grin spreading across my face. “Believe me, once we’re done with Gaines he’s gonna wish he never messed with Ed.” Oswald grins at this.

     “Perfect,” he whispers and we refocus our attention on Ed.

[lenfaz]

Time Upon Once, ch. 9 (9/?)

Summary:  Killian Jones is a bailbonds man, living in Boston and doing his own thing. But on his 29th birthday, a kid knocks on his door and claims to be his son. What happens when Killian is forced to face his past along with a mystery prophecy about his own purpose in life?

Rating: M (eventually)

A huge thank you to @tnlph @businesscasualprincess and @blessed-but-distressed  for beta duties and @shady-swan-jones for the banner!

Tagging a few people that showed interest in this story:@lk0622@nowforruin@sambethe@xemmaloveskillianx  @l-e-x-a-xd @profoundlyfadedprincess @once-uponacaptain @icecubelotr44  @poetic-justice-96 @allietumbles @el-kelpo @jennjenn615 @leiandcharles  (want to be tagged? let me know and I’ll do it)

on Tumblr: I II III IV V VI VII VIII

ao3 ff.net

Chapter IX

It had been a couple of quiet weeks and Killian had gotten into a comfortable routine of running the Sheriff’s station and spending time with Henry when he could. He wasn’t sure if Regina had allowed it - or if she was merely turning a blind eye, but either way he’d been grateful. He’d also made a habit of spending his evenings with Mary Margaret, helping ease the loneliness it seemed to surround her and even convincing her to hit the local bar once or twice a week. He had yet to find a decent bloke for her, but he hadn’t given up hope. Killian was sure there were some suitable choices in Storybrooke that weren’t married. There had to be.

But the honeymoon period at the Sheriff’s office had to come to an end eventually and it wasn’t long before Killian found himself entering the local convenience store after a call from the owner about a shoplifting situation. The first thing that struck him as odd was running into Regina and Henry leaving the store.

“Henry, what happened?”

“Mr. Jones, must I remind you that genetics mean nothing. You shouldn’t be here. It’s all taken care of.”

Regina had a point, and Killian knew better than to go against her, but he couldn’t resist the words that came to his mouth. “I’m here because I’m the Sheriff, Mayor Mills.”

Regina rolled her eyes as if he were a nuisance she hadn’t been able to get rid of. “Oh, that’s right. Go on – do your job. Take care of those miscreants.” She pointed to the interior of the store as she motioned Henry out.

Killian focused his attention back to the store and the two kids that were looking at him with terrified expressions.

“Did you call their parents?” he asked Mr. Clark, the store owner.

“Uh, the number they gave me was disconnected.” Mr. Clark stepped into the back of the store to give Killian some privacy with the kids.

“Did you gave Mr. Clark a fake number?” He tried to give his voice authority without overdoing it, as the fear on the kids’ faces was almost palpable at this point.

They both shook their heads. He pressed for more information. “Then why’s it disconnected?”

“Cause our parents couldn’t pay the bill.” The girl’s voice was small, broken by fear and shame and it tugged at Killian’s heart. His eyes darted to the items lying over the counter. There were a few candy bars, but he could also see some necessity items in there. Food, toiletries. He could see all the signs. After all, how many times had Killian himself been in that same spot when he was young?

“You’re just trying to help out, aren’t you?” He gave them what he hoped was an encouraging smile.

“Please – please don’t arrest us. It will just make things worse for our parents,” the girl begged.

He’d love to have a few words with those parents. Killian really wanted that, but right now, he needed to ensure those kids were not more frightened by life than what they already were.

He motioned with his hand as he reached for his wallet to pay for the groceries. “Come on, I’ll take you home.”

/-/

It wasn’t a long ride until they reached the house. The children were sat in the back of the cruiser, holding the bags of groceries Killian had purchased for them. On first sight, the house gave him a bad feeling. It didn’t seemed inhabited. Not really. The structure was there, but the door and shutters were closed and nothing seemed out of place. Something didn’t quite fit. Killian turned around and looked at them.

“This is it?” They both nodded. “Alright, let’s go.” He took off his seatbelt and reached to open the door, but the girl - Ava - stopped him.

“Please, no. If our parents see you, they’ll be so embarrassed.”

Something in her voice didn’t seem quite right. Killian tilted his head and studied her face. “Did Henry tell you about my superpower?” When both kids shook their heads, he gave them a tight smile. “I can tell when someone is lying to me. So, tell me the truth - other than money problems, is everything okay at home?”

Killian knew it was a long shot, the children had barely met him and they seem to run like a tight unit, with Ava doing the talking while the lad - Nicholas - followed her lead. So it was little surprise that it was Ava who looked straight into his eyes and delivered the perfected lie.

“Yeah, we’re great. Can we go?”

He wasn’t born yesterday, but he also knew he was not going to get a single word out of them at this moment, so he simply nodded and watched them get out of the car. They went up the stairs and turned around as Killian turned over the engine. The children waved at him and seemed to be waiting for Killian to drive off, which he promptly did.

He didn’t go far. Killian turned around the corner and parked the car. He killed the engine and got out. The children were no longer on the stairs when he made his way back to the house. He tried the door, and it gave way easily. He opened it enough to pop his head inside the house.

Not only there wasn’t a living soul in the house, but there wasn’t much to begin with. Killian sighed as he entered the house, verifying his worst suspicious as he took a few steps and noticed that no one  - and nothing - lived there. Not for a good long while.

A singular noise coming from the kitchen - as if a door were opening - made him walk towards that room, his hand reaching to the gun he kept at his hip. But he quickly drop the hand when he noticed Ava and Nicholas coming from the basement, their backs to him.  

“Why’d you guys lie to me?” he asked in a clipped tone and watched as the kids turned around, a horrified expression on their faces. “Where are your parents?” he insisted.

And then Ava delivered the few words that were sure to rip out his heart. “We don’t have any.”

/-/

Unsure of what to do, or more accurately, hesitant to execute what he knew had to do, Killian made a quick stop at the Sheriff’s station to pick up any files they had on the kids before he took them to the loft. Mary Margaret hadn’t arrived yet - he recalled she had mentioned a teacher’s meeting at the end of her day -, and whilst Killian wasn’t a master cook, he could still throw a few things together in order to prepare a decent meal.

He glanced at the two kids that were looking at him with a mix of apprehension and fear, his mind taking him back to all the times he felt the same way when he was their age. Alone, scared, uncertain of his future, grieving. Killian sighed and tried to think of what type of food he could make for them that could at least put them at ease for a while.

And that is how Mary Margaret entered the loft to a sight of the three of them eating mac and cheese with juice.

“I saved you a ration,” Killian smiled shyly as Mary Margaret cocked an eyebrow at him, feeling like a ten-year old caught by his mother.

She sighed, running a hand through his hair before he grabbed a file and tilted his head for her to join him on the other side of the room, out of the kids’ earshot.

“Do you know them from school?” Killian asked when he was sure the kids were not able to hear him.

Mary Margaret look over Killian’s shoulder at the children with despair. “I’ve seen them, but… I had no idea. None of us did,” she sighed with defeat, as if she were berating herself for not realizing any of this, even if the children were not in her class.

Killian opened the file and read from it. “Ava and Nicholas Zimmer. They said their mother was a woman named Dory Zimmer. She died a few years ago. No one seems to know her or remember her.” He looked up to find Mary Margaret shaking her head and if she couldn’t remember the woman either.

“And the father?”

Killian sighed. “There isn’t one. At least not one that they know.” It seemed to be a dead end.

“What does Social Services say?” She asked with concern in her voice. Killian’s mouth opened, but no words came out of it as he winced and gave Mary Margaret a sheepish look.

Realization dawned on Mary Margaret. “You didn’t report them.”

“I can’t,” Killian sighed. “I report them, I can’t help them. They go into the system.”

“The system that’s supposed to help,” Mary Margaret stated, only to be met by his stern eyes.

“Mary Margaret, you didn’t grow up in there. It’s not all it’s cracked up to be.”

She gave him a smile that had a hint of commiseration in it. If it had come from anyone else, he’d already be out of the door. But somehow, it didn’t bother him when it came from Mary Margaret. It made him feel cared for, in way that it was almost too scary for him to admit. “You - you had a good home.”

“But I was adopted when I was baby!” He tried to keep the emotion out of his voice, but he was failing and he knew it the moment his eyes filled with tears he fought off. “When the Joneses died and I went back to the system, it wasn’t nice… at all.”

“But perhaps for them-” she started but he cut her off.

“At their age, so close to the holidays, they won’t make it to a good home. They’ll get thrown into homes where they are a meal ticket – nothing more. These families get paid for these kids and as soon as they’re too much work, they get tossed out and it all starts over again.” His voice was nothing but a broken whisper. “Trust me, I know.”

He dared to meet her eyes again, almost ashamed of revealing that much of himself, even to Mary Margaret. All there was in her eyes was sympathy. “Killian, do you want to keep them?” she asked softly.

“I want to look for their father. They don’t know him. He may not know they exist.”

Understanding crept into her eyes. “You think if he knows, he’ll want them.”

He nodded, not being able to voice the thoughts he knew were showing on his expression.

I’ve always wanted Henry… I just couldn’t have him.

“I have to try. Because what I do know is hard enough finding foster families to take one kid that isn’t theirs, let alone two. It’s their best shot, or-”

The voice behind him cut him off. “We’re going to be separated?”

Killian and Mary Margaret turned to find Ava looking at them with tears in her eyes. Killian’s heart tugged at the image in front of him, so familiar for him that he’d lost count of the time he’d seen such despair in all the homes he’d been in.

“No,” he said reassuringly. “That is not going to happen.”

“Please – please don’t let it,” she begged with such desperation in her voice that broke his heart.

/-/

Killian walked into the public registry office and looked for the man behind it. “Excuse me, Mr. -” He took a look at the little plaque set on the counter. “Krzyszkowski?”

After being corrected on the correct pronunciation of the name, Killian introduced himself. “I’m Sheriff Jones. I’m hoping to take a look at the birth certificates of Ava and Nicholas Zimmer.”

He was instructed to fill in some forms - in triplicate - and he was immersed in local red tape as the man busied himself looking in the filing cabinets. Krzyszkowski turned around with an unalterable expression. “I’m sorry, Sheriff. But the documents have been recently removed.”

“By who?”

He shouldn’t have been surprised by the answer. “The Mayor.”

Luckily, it was only a short walk down the hall from the registry into the Mayor’s office in Town Hall. He didn’t bother with polite greetings as he barged into the office and found Regina standing by her desk, rearranging some flowers. “Did you take the Zimmer kids’ file?”

Regina turned and quirked her smile at him. “Don’t worry, Mr. Jones. You can relax.” She walked around her desk and stood on the other side. “I’ve contacted Social Services. Turns out these kids are on their own. They need help.” There was a hint of something of a challenge in her voice, as if she was trying to see if he was going to falter at this news.

Killian tried to school his features, not letting Regina see how much this was affecting him. “I’m trying to help. I’m trying to find their father.”

“Well, he doesn’t exist.” Regina shrugged her shoulders in a dismissive way.

“He has to.”

She handed him the folder and Killian opened, his heart breaking at the “UNKNOWN” word underneath father in the records.

“Well, of course, biologically, he exists. But unlike you, there’s no record of him.” Killian could read in her words how much she’d preferred that he wasn’t listed on Henry’s birth certificate. “Which means we have no choice – these children need a home, so they will be put into the foster system.”

“Storybrooke has a foster system?” Maybe he could do some recon on the people, keep a close eye on them. Even if things went bad, he could perhaps convince Mary Margaret to-

“No.” Regina’s word put a stop to his hope. “I’ve contacted the state. Maine’s group homes, unfortunately, are filled.” Regina walked towards a side table by the opposite wall and pulled herself a glass of juice. “But they put us in touch with two homes in Boston – a boy’s home and a girl’s.”

No.  

“They’re separating them?” He couldn’t fight the emotion that was present in his voice or the way he knew his face was faltering.

“I don’t like it, either. But we’ve got no choice. You need to have them in Boston tonight.”

“Me?” As if life wasn’t already a cruel joke.

“You wanted to be Sheriff.” Regina played with the rim of her glass as she looked at him. “This is what sheriffs do. Yes, you’re taking them.”

“I promised them they wouldn’t be separated,” Killian sighed, running a hand through his hair.

“Perhaps you should stop making promises you can’t keep.” Her voice had a triumphal tone that made Killian shiver. “These children need a home. I’m just trying to find the best one.”

Separated foster homes were not the best choices, he thought. But at this point, he had little else to offer them.

/-/

Killian had spent the rest of the day poring over files at the station, trying to find a lead. But there were none. He was caught up reading when he heard the door to the office open. He lifted his head and found Henry walking in, carrying his backpack and the storybook with him.

“Any luck?” he asked as dropped his backpack on the floor and put the book over on the desk.

“No,” Killian sighed, running a hand over his face in frustration.

Henry opened the book and flipped through it. “I know who they are. They’re brother and sister, lost, no parents,” he found a page and turned the book towards Killian, showing him an illustration of two children in a forest. “Hansel and Gretel.”

He had to give it to Henry, the kid was good at relating real life stories with the fairy tales from his book. “Anything in there about the father?” Killian thought it was worth a shot to see if perhaps this could inspire a real life lead.

Henry shook his head. “Just that he abandoned them.”

“Great.” Killian stood up and headed for the filing cabinet, pulling some missing person’s reports to see if there was anything in there. “He could be anywhere by now.”

“No, he’s here,” Henry said with conviction. “No one leaves Storybrooke. No one comes here, no one goes. It’s just the way it is.”

“You left,” Killian pointed out as he sat again and opened one of the files. “I came here.”

“Because you’re special. You’re the first stranger here – ever.” Henry insisted as he sat over the desk and Killian wondered once again how bad the situation must have been that Henry had concocted all these fables in his mind.

“Well, if he’s still here, I will find him.” Finding people was what he did best. He just needed a bloody lead to start his tracking. Something. Anything.

“Speaking of parents,” Henry started and something in his tone made Killian lift his head. “Can you tell me more about Emma?”

Killian smiled at his son. “Henry, I-”

“Please?” he begged, his eyes wide with an aching need that Killian knew too well. It was the same he’d sported most of his life. “Were you together when you went to jail? What happened?”

It was all Henry had to say for Killian’s mind to drift to the night he’d pinpointed as the beginning of the end.

It was a few months after his 18th birthday that they stood in a soft embrace at the entrance of that motel room. They were still spending most of their nights in the backseat of the Bug; but, somehow, the night manager had taken a shine to them. She’d let them use of the vacant rooms once a week, so they could have a hot shower and a warm bed. If she realized how young they were - or how they seemed to get by - she didn’t mention as she slid Killian the key each time, along with a 20 dollar bill he always refused to accept.

But soon their hardships would be over. Once he succeeded in doing the pick-up Neal and August had told him about, his cut would enough to buy them a better life. He’d made sure of it when Neal and August had tried to negotiate with him.

“I still don’t trust them,” Emma whispered against his neck, her lips caressing the bare skin and causing him to shiver, his hand tightening his grip on her waist as he pulled her closer to him. “August is always acting mysterious and broody as if that makes him interesting -” Killian chuckled at Emma’s clear distaste for the cryptic man, whose theatrics hadn’t impressed Killian either. “And Neal-”

It was her time to shudder and Killian held her tighter. Neither of them liked Neal that much, but Killian especially didn’t like the way his eyes would roam over Emma. He had thought about quitting on this task a few times and just taking Emma and driving the Bug far away, but the possibilities-

“I know.” His voice was exuding a calm he didn’t quite feel as he took a step away from her embrace and met her eyes. “I don’t like it either but Emma, this can change everything. This will change everything.”

His fingers interlaced with hers. “I pull this off and then we can be out of here… we can start over in another city. We’ll have enough money to rent a place and we can work on getting our GEDs and finding jobs-” he trailed off, his other hand reaching to trail her cheek and she leaned in further into his touch.

“We can have the life we always wanted. The life we deserve.”

The life you deserve.

Her lips claimed his in a desperate way, as if she were pouring all her fears and hesitations in that kiss, in the way she pulled him further into the room and towards the bed.

“Promise me you’ll be careful. Promise me you’ll come back to me.”

“Aye, I promise,” he whispered as he laid her gently down on the bed and hovered over her, his lips never leaving her skin.

Killian cleared his throat, bringing himself back from the painful memories. “I made her a promise I couldn’t keep.” He met Henry’s eyes fair and square. “When I- when I went to jail, I was framed. Emma, she didn’t trust the men I associated with and she tried to warn me, but I didn’t listen to her. I promised her everything would be okay. And it wasn’t.”

I left her alone, the moment she needed me the most.

“I never meant to betray her, but I did.” He sighed, running a hand through the back of his neck.

“Did you try to look for her? When you got out of jail?”

“Aye… but I couldn’t find her, m’boy” His voice was thick with emotion, his eyes welling with tears as he witnessed Henry’s heartache.

“I couldn’t find her either.” He tilted his head in that way Killian was so familiar with. “Do you have anything from her? Other than the picture you gave me?”

Killian sadly shook his head. “I’ll tell you what. You can have the Bug when you’re old enough to drive. It was her car to begin with.”

Henry beamed at him and Killian wished with all his heart that he could have something - anything - left from Emma to give to the boy. Something to know how much Emma had cared about him. Because he had no doubt in his mind that Emma had cared for the lad, so much that she let Henry go so he could have his better chance. Something the lad could hold onto for the rest of his life, much like he had held onto his baby blanket-

His eyes widened as realization dawned on him.

“Henry, I have to go… I think I know how to track this guy.” He quickly stood up and reached to kiss the lad on his forehead before he exited the station and headed to the loft. He had an idea on how to start looking for this guy.

He was halfway down the block when he realized it was the first time he’d kissed his son’s forehead.

/-/

He retrieved the box with his meager mementos and headed downstairs, where the children were eating milk and decorated cookies - Mary Margaret really had a knack for hosting.

“I want to show you something,” he said as he pulled his blanket out of the box where it was laying carefully next to a little box that carried a few mementos. It was a white one with blue ribbons and his name embroidered in blue as well.

“What’s that?”

“It’s my baby blanket. It’s something I’ve held onto my whole life. It’s the only thing that I have from… from the people that gave birth to me.” He couldn’t bring himself to call them his parents. Not even in this moment. “I’ve spent a lot of time with kids in your situation and they - we - hold onto stuff.” He gave them an encouraging smile as their eyes widened at his confession. Aye, a lost boy trying to help another set of lost children. “I want to find your father, but I need your help. Is there anything you’ve held onto?”

Ava gave him an inquisitive look. “I might… but if I give it to you, you'll make sure we stay together, right?”

“Aye.” He was going to do everything in his power to keep that promise.

She pulled an object from the pocket of her sweater and handed it to him. It was a compass secured to a chain.

“Our mom kept it. She said it was our dad’s.”

He took the compass with the reverence it deserved. “Thank you.” He turned it in his hands to examine it for possible clues.

“Did you find them?” Ava’s voice broke him out of his focus.

“Who?”

“Your parents.”

“No. I found people that raised me as their own until I lost them. After that, I knew it wasn’t worth looking.” He knew it was not the best tale, but he had to tell them the truth. “But I will find yours.”

/-/

Dealing with Gold was always something that Killian despised, and dealing with the man when he needed something from him always left him with a sour taste in his mouth. But alas, after some gibberish speech about craftsmanship of the piece and a request for forgiveness - Gold had to settle for tolerance because Killian wasn’t interested in much more - Killian had walked out of the pawnshop with a name.

Michael Tillman.

It was quite easy to find the man working at his garage. What wasn’t easy was convincing him he’d fathered twins twelve years ago.

“It can’t be possible.” Michael held the files with Ava and Nicholas’ pictures in his hands, but refused to believe it.

“Aye, mate, but it is.”

Michael handed them back the files. “Dory wasn’t my - it was just once.”

Killian tilted his head. “Sometimes, that’s all it takes.”

“I met her when I was camping… it was a fling. It can’t be. I don’t have twins.”

Killian had enough of the man’s reticence. It wasn’t the first time he’d found it in his line of work. “Yes, you do.” The firm tone of his voice caught Michael’s attention. “You have twins that have been homeless ever since their mother passed away. You have twins who have been living in an abandoned house because they don’t want to be separated from each other. You have twins who are about to be shipped off to Boston, unless you step up and take responsibility for them.”

“I can barely manage this garage. I can’t manage two kids. And why are you so sure they’re mine?”

He was going to punch the guy, God help him. “Besides the timing?” He took the compass out of his pocket. “Perhaps you’ve lost this, I don't’ know - twelve years and nine months ago?”

Michael froze as he took the compass and Killian felt sorry for the man. “Look, I know it’s a lot to take in.”

“What would you know? It’s not like you took care of yours.”

Killian clenched his jaw and tilted his head, taking a deep breath to calm himself. “Don’t talk about things you don’t understand, mate.” There was enough threat in his voice to make the other man recoil a few steps. He sighed, running a hand through his hair. “I know it’s not easy. The son I consented to give up for adoption showed up at my doorstep a little over month ago, asking for help with… something. And I ended up moving here for him.” It was unbelievable that it’d only been a month since his life had changed so drastically. Only a month of meeting the one person - the other person - he knew he’d never leave in his life.

“Staying in town, it’s a lot different than taking him in.”

“You have a choice, I didn’t.” Killian met Michael’s eyes. “Those kids didn’t ask to be brought into this world. You brought them into this world – you and their mother. And they need you. And if you choose not to take them, you are going to have to answer for that every day of your life. And sooner or later, when they find you – because believe me, they will find you – you’re going to have to answer to them.”

But no matter how much he was trying to get through the man, it was a fruitless attempt. “I’m really sorry. I am. But I don’t know anything about being a dad. If it’s a good home you’re looking for, it’s not with me.” He handed the compass back to Killian and turned away from him.

He knew he should just let it go, just walk away and drive those kids down to Boston and hope they end up in a place where they were wanted. He should just do his duty as the Sheriff of this town.

And yet- Killian closed his fist over the compass. “I didn’t know anything about being a father either, mate, but that doesn’t mean we leave our children to their fate when they need us.”

/-/

He couldn’t face coming back to the loft. Heartbroken, he made a phone call to the one person he needed to talk with at this moment.

Mary Margaret quickly met him outside.

“He doesn’t want the kids,” he sighed in defeat.

“And you don’t want to tell them.” Mary Margaret was getting really good at reading him like an open book.

“I can’t tell them. I’ll be breaking their hearts.” He ran his hand through his hair. “I’ll be yet another adult that gave them false hope and lied to them.”

“Are you talking about them - or you?” Mary Margaret quirked an eyebrow at him. “Killian, the truth can be painful, but it can also be cathartic.”

“I have yet to see the cathartic part.” Killian offered with a quip, trying hard to control the turmoil of emotions he was feeling with this entire case. “Perhaps we can hide them, just until we find someone in town willing to take care of them?”

“The Sheriff talking about hiding two twelve year olds. This is a great plan, Killian.” It had to be the first time she was this sarcastic with him.

“Do you have a better idea, darling?” He snapped back. “Something that doesn’t involve separating those kids and break their hearts?”

If Mary Margaret had a plan, she couldn’t say because they were interrupted by the Mayor.

“Sheriff, shouldn’t you be on the interstate by now?”

“Keeping tabs on me, love?” Killian knew he shouldn’t be talking like that to the Mayor, but he couldn’t bring himself to care.

“Seeing to it that you do your job, that is all.”

“You don’t have to check up on me, Regina.” He took a couple of steps and invading her personal space, having the satisfaction to see her step back. “I know what I have to do. I’m quite good at it.”

This was a terrible - terrible - idea. He was playing with fire. Regina’s eyes avoided him for a second before she took a hold of herself.

“Have them in Boston tonight, Sheriff Jones.”

/-/

Killian couldn’t even make eye contact with the children as he drove them towards the town exit, Henry’s warning about them not being able to leave town still lingering in his mind. It was then when the patrol car started slowing and the engine making a few alarming noises. He pulled to the side of the road just in time, as the engine cut out and refused to start again. He gave it one half-hearted try to see if the engine would respond. It ‘didn’t’.

Oh, well. He had no option but to call in a tow.

It wasn’t long until Michael Tillman showed up and the way his eyes widened at the two children sitting in the back of the patrol car said everything Killian needed to know.

“That’s them.”

“Aye. I just wanted you to see them. At least once.” Killian swallowed, pushing his fears aside. “I didn’t think I could do it either. Henry’s birth mother and I, we wanted to give him his best shot. When he came to me, and I saw he wasn’t as happy as I wanted him to be, I couldn’t leave. Not until I knew he’d be okay. But now, now that I know him, I can’t go back. It’s all or nothing now.”

He met Michael’s eyes. “I’m sure the car will start again if I really get into it. I have to take them to Boston.”

“No, you don’t.” Michael quickly made his way towards the patrol car and Killian’s heart got a little rest from the turmoil of the past few days as he saw father and children fuse into an embrace.

It was a long day and by the time he finally made it back to the loft, he was knackered. Mary Margaret was sitting on her bed, folding laundry. Killian threw himself down on the bed. “Their dad showed up. Changed his mind.” He offered as explanation, but nothing seemed to get past Mary Margaret.

“Just like that?” There was that tone that probably would make eight year olds confess to the pettiest of crimes. And it seemed to be working on Killian too.

“I might have given him a little nudge.” Mary Margaret quirked an eyebrow at him. “Well, perhaps a shove.” His eyes focused on the ceiling, letting his own buried hopes and dreams come to the surface. “I’ve always wondered, you know? What it would be like to find them. After I lost my adop - my parents, I always thought perhaps my birth parents would find me… explain to me why they left me. But they never did.”

“You don’t need to find your birth parents, Killian. Not if you don’t want to,” Mary Margaret offered empathically, her hand squeezing his.

Killian propped himself up on one elbow. “No I don’t,” he gave her a mischievous smile. “And according to Henry, I already found them.”

Mary Margaret’s eyes twinkled with mischief, as she made an act of studying him carefully. “You do have my chin. And my hair.”

“And your undying optimism. Oh no, wait!”

They both laughed for a moment or two. “Yeah, maybe not that.”

Killian sighed and forced himself to leave the comfortable bed and the warmth of the loft. “I’m going to go see Henry.” He gave Mary Margaret a final smile. “I’ll see you later?”

“Don’t stay out too late!” She called after him in a motherly tone.

/-/

Killian and Henry sat on the bench, drinking hot chocolate and talking about Ava and Nicholas, when the sound of an approaching motorcycle made them both tilt their heads in confusion.

“I don’t recall anyone having a motorcycle in town… Henry?”

Henry shook his head in confirmation of his thoughts. “This is weird. No strangers come into town.”

As the bike came closer, Killian’s blood ran cold. He’d seen that motorcycle before, and worse - he thought he knew the man who sat astride it, his face hidden behind that helmet. His heart stopped and his worst suspicions were confirmed the moment the bike slowed to a stop in front of them.

“That is no stranger, lad,” Killian said as he stood up from the bench and pushed Henry behind him.

As he feared, as the man lifted the helmet off he found the familiar face of a brown haired man with blue eyes staring at him.

“Killian,” the man started but Killian didn’t let him finish, taking two steps and crossing his arms over his chest.

“What in the blazes are you doing here, August?”