#i just didn't want anyone to feel weirded out if i put their writing under a spotlight.

[sturnsdarling]

'I get them too, sometimes'

y/n has an anxiety attack, and bff!matt calms her down the only way he can think of in the moment

vibe check: detailed anxiety attack, comforting!matt, anxious!reader, fluffy ending cute vibes all round

1.5k words

A/N: WHEN WILL IT BE MY TURN anyways this is based on the iconic stydia scene where stiles has a panic attack and lydia kisses him. I was gonna do it where Matt had the anxiety attack but it felt icky so I swapped it round. as an anxious girlie this was weirdly comforting to write and PART TWO IS HERE

love and cigs, merc

The boys' house was vibrating with the thump of music from every corner. People were pouring in through the front door, all mingling in the living room as Chris' party playlist blared through the speakers. Almost everyone in the influencer space was there, and you felt like the odd one out.

The boys' had begged you to come, pulling the 'it wont be the same without you' card as they all glared at you with puppy eyes. They knew parties weren't really your thing but, it was a celebration for them hitting seven million on their youtube channel and, you knew you couldn't miss it. So after some begging and bribing with 'literally anything you want from that weird old book shop in downtown' you agreed to go.

You felt like you were wearing a sign that said, in big bold letters; 'I don't belong here' as you lent against the kitchen counter, nursing some liquid courage. Chris was on the sofa, his laughter booming over the music as he sat with Nate and some boys you didn't recognise. Nick was at the drink station, making cocktails with the girls, pretending to be a bartender as he tired, and failed, at bar flares, making everyone around him curl over with laughter, as usual. Matt was on the other side of the kitchen, talking to some people about whatever show he was obsessed with at the moment and peering over at you occasionally to make sure you were okay.

More and more people started to pile into the house, more people than you even thought they knew, and at the sight of tens of faces you didn't know, a tight feeling started to form in your chest. You knew you were okay, because you had the boys, but they were off mingling and doing their rounds and you didn't exactly want to follow them around like a lost puppy.

You put your drink down, walking over to the sink to fill a red cup with water, your hand shaking slightly as you brought the cup to your mouth. You took a gulp and closed your eyes, taking a deep breath in and reminding yourself that you were fine, and you were in the boys' house. You knew that they wouldn't invite anyone that they didn't trust in their home and just kept reminding yourself of that.

An already drunk and giggly girl barged into the kitchen, flayling about without a care in the world as she backed up into you, knocking your drink from your hand and nearly pushing you into the sink.

"oh, shit, m'so sorry babe" she said as you turned around slightly. She placed a soft hand on your shoulder and squeezed it, "oh my god you're so pretty what the fuck!" she squealed, "m'sorry for spilling your drink" she slurred, sauntering away as you forced a smile.

Despite the somewhat sweet interaction, something about it made your fingers go numb, your chest tightening at the feeling of your wet shirt clinging to your skin. The walls started to close in and you felt as if you could feel the world turning on its axis. Your breath felt like sand paper against your throat as you tried to steady your rapid heart rate and failed.

You pushed your way through the crowds of people and b-lined for Matt's room, your knees nearly buckling under you as you desperately tried to calm your breathing.

As if he could feel your energy change, Matt instinctively looked for you in the crowd, catching a glimpse of your frame as you ducked between people, near enough running to his room.

"I'll be right back" he said to the guy in front of him, placing his drink down and following you through the crowd, calling out your name as he did.

You fumbled at the door handle, pushing yourself inside Matts room as your vision began to blur. Your chest was heaving up and down with rapid breaths, every inhale felt nearly impossible and everything around you was pulsating, your vision turning to a fishbowl as you clawed at your chest.

"y/n/n" Matt entered the room, searching for you in the dim light.

You turned to face him, your eyes brimming with tears as you pressed hard fingers into your sternum, Matts eyes widened at the sight of you and he shut the door, coming to you in an instant, gentle hands on your shoulders as he tried to keep them in one place.

"hey, hey, you're okay, you're okay" He repeated, knowing immediately what was happening.

"I can't - I can't breathe" you stuttered out, pleading eyes burning holes into his. Your knees buckled from under you, feeling like the world was shifting under your feet.

Matt followed you to the floor, hands still gripping your shoulders. "Its okay, breathe with me, okay?" He said, taking a long inhale and encouraging you to copy him, his eyes baring into yours.

You tried to mimic his movements, a shaky breath rattling through your nose. Matt breathed out, nodding as he did and you did the same, the feeling in your chest only worsening, it felt like someone had tied a belt round your shoulders, and was pulling it closed as tight as they could around your chest, watching with a smile as the breath left your lungs.

You clenched your eyes closed and shook your head, "s'not working, Matt, nothing is working" a small sob left you as you grew more and more frustrated.

His jaw clenched at the sight of your shaking frame, feeling utterly helpless as you clawed at your chest. He brought his hands to cup your cheeks, bringing your head up to look at him.

"Its okay, y/n, m'right here, I'm right here" he poured into you, not letting you break eye contact as he tried to breathe as slowly as possible.

His thumbs stroked soft touches against your cheek, his eyes racing around your face as you desperately tried to catch your breath. Your eyes flitted back and forth between his, searching for solace in his face, feeling like the walls were closing in around you. Matts eyes fell to your lips, and quickly met your eyes once more. Your brows furrowed in frustration, eyes running circles around his features as his lips parted slightly.

Before you could register what was happening, Matt pulled you into him, crashing his lips against yours in a soft yet strong kiss.

Your eyes widened at the feeling, Matts soft lips pressed against yours as he held you tight against his face. After a moment in the embrace, your shoulders relaxed and your eyes closed, and you started to kiss him back, your arms limp by your sides.

In that moment, you felt as if nothing mattered. Your heart rate slowed and you took a calm, steady breath in through your nose. Matt pulled away from the kiss, hands still wrapped around your face as you took a long breath out through your parted mouth. Matts eyes fluttered open and he let his hands drop down to his knees. Your eyes met his, slow breaths engulfing your lungs.

"h - how did you do that?" you asked in a breathy tone

"I um - I saw somewhere that the best way to stop a panic attack is by holding your breath, so" he muttered, averting his gaze from yours.

"so, when you kissed me" you began to speak

"you held your breath" he looked back up at you, bringing his lips inside themselves, the taste of your lip balm dancing on his tongue.

You smiled, a final, relieved breath leaving your lips as you stared into him.

"thankyou" your gaze was soft and utterly grateful, doe eyes pouring into his as he shuffled where he sat.

"of course" he shrugged, looking down to the floor

You sat in silence for a moment, not a trace of awkwardness hung in the air.

"I get them too, sometimes" Matt said as he toyed with a piece of lint on the floor.

"you do?" you said, still looking at him

"mhm" he nodded, meeting your eye-line, slightly taken back by you already looking at him, "feels like the whole world is crumbling around you, shits' not fun"

"yeah" you chuckled, relaxing where you sat.

"d'you - do you wanna hang out in here for a bit? I can stay with you" Matt said, his eye contact wavering at the offer only to return to you once more.

"oh you don't - you don't have to do that, Matt, you'll miss your party" you shook your head.

"I don't really like parties anyway" he replied, "I'd honestly rather sit here with you on the floor all night" he chuckled, gesturing to the floor.

You smiled as a soft laugh left your nose, "okay" you said.

"yeah?" his head shot up to meet your gaze.

"yeah." you nodded

taglist: @sturniozalt@mattslolita@shaquilles-0atmeal@blahbel668@sleepysturniolo@le4hsblog @sarosfilms @joemamaaa42069 @2muchofaslvt @seluky10

[toxicanonymity]

the green

WC: 2.4k... I guess to find a scene, I had to find a world, then I didn't want to trim the fat because I liked it 😔

PAIRING: Ezra x f!reader; ft. others.

A/N: For @iamasaddie's writing challenge 4.0. I got Ezra: Aquarius, (i decided dark) Rave AU. Some of you write Ezra dialogue so well and true to character. That is not my forte and I didn't force it, but he speaks differently than others.

WARNINGS (not exhaustive, read at your own discretion): I8+ stefon voice: "this club has everything." drugs, surrealism, dark atmosphere*, sex cult vibes, public nudity, jacking off, manhandling, cumshot (dubcon), slapping, choking, spitting. Infidelity. You have a daddy. *I'd say "mild" horror but there's a mummified body in passing. A few cameos. It gets weird. unrefined chaos.

FIC ART: Amazing visual by @aurorawritestoescape

Drawing by @romana-after-dark

The Green was the one place your daddy explicitly forbade you from going. He never said why, but you assumed because the club entrance was down in the catacombs.

There were countless urban legends of doped up partiers getting lost, only to be found years later. One was discovered in a remote ossuary curled up with a faded can of New Coke. A picture had circulated – The poor soul’s shrunken legs were bent, knees drawn to their chest, yellow leggings stiffened and soiled under a pink leotard which by then fit like a paper bag.

—

When your friend said that’s where you were headed one night, you tried to convince her into going anywhere else. The problem was, she was obsessed with a DJ at the Green.

“I don’t get it,” she protested. “I know it’s not because you’re scared.”

“I just can't,” you pleaded futilely, and then she caught on when you wouldn’t meet her eyes.

Her jaw clenched, and her nostrils flared. “Let me guess,” she spat. “Because you’re letting a married man control your life.”

“Come on,” you pleaded.

“Billy may be a slut, but he's not married,” she bragged of the DJ.

. . .

An hour later, you and your friend were both high, dancing near the front of the crowd. In the humidity, you took off your bra, leaving a snug, mesh crop top and leather miniskirt. By then about 10% of the crowd was nude or close to it.

A song faded out, and a dense fog began to billow into the crowd. The fog smelled thickly of vegetation and masked some of the body odor you had been inhaling all night. The crowd quietly murmured, and with a few scattered whistles of enthusiasm.

As the fog settled, Billy the DJ put on a soothing binaural beat and introduced his mate, Ezra. As the crowd whistles and cheered, Billy hopped down from the booth and made a bee-line for your friend.

“There she is,” he murmured into her neck and wrapped his arms around her. “Is your friend joining us?”

“No,” she answered without looking at you. “Her daddy wouldn't like that.”

“Oh,” Billy looked you up and down, impressed. “Tell me ‘bout that later, love?” Billy winked at you as she dragged him away, leaving you alone.

–

Ezra stepped onto the stage and commenced with. . . spoken word poetry.

You didn't have the presence of mind for it, but the crowd was captivated. They knew him. As he droned on, some of them dropped to their knees, including a tattooed young man next to you in nothing but a sweatband. On the floor, he bent forward in child’s pose, arms stretched toward Ezra as though in worship. Through the remaining fog, the man’s glow-in-the-dark butt plug caught your eye.

Ezra had a mesmerizing voice. “Yes,” he echoed over the beat, and you found yourself tuning in. “Yes, feel my tongue penetrate you. Feel my words inside you!” You felt him opening something in your chest.

You scanned the crowd. The effect he had on these people was — The back of your neck prickled, and your exposed nipples hardened.

And then, you felt eyes on you. Not just anyone's. Your breath hitched. In the corner of your eye, Ezra was looking right at you. His voice became more tranquil: “I am already inside you.” A zing of pleasure shot through your chest, and a tingling heat spread through your loins. “Be not afraid,” he cooed. “Look at me while I penetrate you.” Your knees felt weak with need. You slowly looked up at him. He was sweating profusely through a worn, gray T-shirt and tactical pants. He dabbed his forehead with his wrist and ran his fingers through a shock of white hair. “yes,” he nodded, not taking his eyes off you. “Let me in deeper, little bird.”

“Let him in,” a few people murmured.

Ezra nodded, and his eyes sparkled as they briefly surveyed the crowd before coming back to you. He allowed a moment of silence, and over the beat, you could hear scattered moans. In your peripheral vision, the guy with the glow-in-the-dark butt plug was sucking cock while jerking himself off.

“Eyes on your god,” Ezra sharply demanded, and your face heated up as your gaze snapped back to him. Your eyes connected and locked together. It felt like you knew him. Like he knew you. You knew each other. You had to.

Ezra wet his lips, and everyone watched as he began to rub himself through his pants, looking right at you. Your eyelashes fluttered at the sight. His presence seized your whole body. Your breaths were shallow. The low beat thumped and hummed, with you in the tightening grip of his gaze.

From behind, you felt the wind of a stranger’s breath on your ear. “it’s okay,” she reassured you. “I’m gonna hold you for him,” the stranger slotted her hands under your arms.

“All over you,” Ezra continued, “the hands of my words, sliding over your skin.” He breathed heavily over the beat. You felt him. Pressure swelled in your depths, and you could hardly keep your eyes open. “Your god’s tongue, tasting the salt of your neck.” You really felt him. Your lips parted, and your clit twitched. “Yes,” Ezra nodded as he slowly rubbed himself, and the thick outline in his pants made you squeeze your thighs. Your body went nearly limp for Ezra's voice, and the stranger held you with your back against her chest. You could feel her nipples through the mesh of your top.

Ezra continued, “Your god’s cock, in the cunt of your soul.” And oh, you felt it deep. He unbuttoned and unzipped his pants, and the crowd cheered and pleaded, “yes, Ezra,” “please, God.” He held his cock in his hand, shapely and majestic.

Desire flooded your body, buzzing and throbbing with the beat of his obscenity. Your mind was full of him and so was your body, it felt. You had room for nothing else. Someone stepped toward the stage, and Ezra let them spit on his dick.

The stranger holding you pushed you forward, bringing you closer to Ezra. Ezra pointed at you with his free hand. As you arrived at the stage, a familiar darkness fell over his eyes, and your heart skipped a beat at the weight of recognition.

You snapped out of the spell. There was something off about this, something wrong about him.

He had someone else's face.

Someone you loved.

Your stomach turned as you stood there beneath Ezra, and he pumped his cock, with the crowd cheering him on. His eyes froze you in place. You willed yourself to move, as though stuck in a nightmare. It was just a bad trip, you told yourself. This wasn't real. It was the drugs.

“It's okay,” the stranger reassured you, and somehow, it helped you breathe easier.

Ezra breathed heavier, and his hungry eyes settled on your chest, making your nipples harden nearly to the point of pain. Goosebumps erupted from your chest and spread over your body.

“The seed of your god,” he panted, chest heaving.

“The seed of our god,” a few voices echoed.

Ezra bit his bottom lip and stroked himself faster.

“Especially for you,” Ezra spoke the words right into your soul, and your body throbbed out of control.

If it was a nightmare, if it was the drugs, you had nothing to lose by surrendering yourself to pleasure.

“Open your mouth,” the stranger urged you. And you did. You opened your mouth and closed your eyes. Ezra's sounds of pleasure became more pronounced. You couldn't be sure how long you stood there with your mouth open. The sound of Ezra growing ever closer to climax had you drawing in a deep breath through your nose and shuddering.

Soon, you smelled his musk and felt the humidity of his loins near your face. He groaned, and a thick rope hit the back of your throat. The warmth and tang of it was too much to bear. You squeezed your eyes tighter shut and saw stars. As your body spasmed, the stranger tried to hold you steady, but the cum that followed went all over your face and chest.

“Good,” Ezra praised when he finished emptying himself onto you. “Good,” he repeated.

The crowd cheered.

You opened your eyes and your body cooled with a wave of guilt. This is what Daddy wanted to protect you from. The spell of another man who bore a striking resemblance to him. You weren't yourself, it was the drugs, you repeated in your mind.

“You okay?” The stranger asked and you nodded.

“Now let them feast,” Ezra concluded and stepped down off the stage, his dick tucked away but his pants unbuttoned. People reached out to touch him as he came through the crowd but kept enough distance that he proceeded coolly, slowly toward the cave entrance.

Soon, you had hands all over you, too. Hands and tongues. People swiping at your skin, licking your face, desperate for a taste of him. You shut your eyes as they drew aftershocks of pleasure from your depths. After a minute, the stranger shooed them away. “Congratulations,” she said, and let you stand on your own.

Meanwhile, Billy and your friend had returned for him to resume his DJ duties. Your friend was dumbstruck by the scene. Billy looked more impressed. “Your first night? Alright, wow,” Billy marveled. “You must be special, love.”

It wasn't lost on you how this annoyed your friend. You pushed past both of them without a word and spotted Ezra's silhouette against the cave wall.

—

Ezra was uncharacteristically silent as you approached, simply taking in the vision of you, disheveled from the touch of strangers, unraveled from his words. He looked pleased with himself.

As you opened your mouth to speak, you hesitated, unsure you wanted to know the answer to your question, or how real this was. You asked him anyway, “What's your last name?” and your heart raced in anticipation.

“I don't have a last name,” he claimed.

“Bullshit. Is it York?”

Ezra drew in a deep breath through his nose and observed your face. “Mmm.” He glanced at the ceiling with a chuckle. “Well heavens, little bird.” His eyes turned regretful. “I surmise you belong to a particular agent of the federal variety.” He raised his eyebrows. “And if my calculation is correct, I sincerely–”

“--Apologize,” A handsome black man with short, greying hair interrupted. In an exaggerated motion, the man pulled up his sleeve to look at his watch. “A little late,” he stated with a glare, punctuated by a pout and raise of his eyebrows. Then, his hand engulfed Ezra’s neck with startling speed and precision. Ezra choked, and the man calmly held firm, beginning to explain, “In approximately 30 seconds, the blood flow to your–”

A different man snatched you by the arm from behind. The grip of his large hand was a familiar, painful comfort. You could feel the bruises forming on your bicep as he physically dragged you away.

“Daddy,” you whimpered. “I'm sorry, I–”

Mr. York didn't speak a word to you until he had you well into the catacombs, away from the club. You could only faintly hear the music start up again. He put you against a cold, rough wall, rolled up the sleeves of his powder blue button-down, and put his hands on his knees as he looked you in the face. His gaze was soft but ominous. It unsettled you.

“I'm sorry, daddy,” tears welled up in your eyes.

Still nothing from him.

His nostrils flared with a deep breath. You'd prefer if he yelled at you, smacked you around. As though reading your tears, he slapped you across the face. Your hand flew up to your cheek instinctively but he swatted it away and simply looked at you as the sting faded. He didn't have to ask the question: What the hell were you doing there?

“I didn't want to come,” you cried. “I didn't wanna–”

“You shouldn't be here,” he stated firmly, and you nodded.

“I know, you said not to come, didn't know it was cause, I didn't know about–”

“Who knows best?” He asked.

“Daddy,” you answered earnestly, “Daddy always does.”

He gave a short nod, then grabbed your jaw and studied each of your eyes. “High off your ass,” he grumbled. Then he sniffed the air. Still firmly holding your jaw, he brought his nose to your cheek, then dragged it down to your neck. There was nothing like your daddy’s touch, even when he was mad. Sometimes especially if he was mad.

He growled and stood upright, bringing his other hand to your neck so he had one hand on your jaw and the other firmly but gently on your throat. He demanded, “What did he do to you?”

“Nothing, he–”

He slightly pressed his finger and thumb into the sides of your neck as a warning, then released them.

“He masturbated and–”

“Did he touch you?”

“No.”

Your daddy brought his face almost to yours, just far enough away to still look in your eyes. When he seemed satisfied that he had the truth, he squeezed your jaw and said, “open.”

You breathed a sigh of relief and opened your mouth. He spat on your tongue and you swallowed it gratefully. His hands released you and he cupped your cheek for a moment before looking back behind himself, getting ready to leave.

“I'm sorry,” you repeated.

“McCall will take care of him,” he muttered.

He pulled you off the wall and led you out of the caves with a firm grip on the back of your neck.

–

In the back of the SUV, Mr. York was sitting on the driver's side, and you were face down sprawled across the whole bench seat. You put your head on his lap, facing his crotch. He laid a hand on your forehead for a minute, but you kept crying and rubbing your face on his pants, and he was tired. He stared out the window, despite that your microskirt had ridden up to where your ass was half covered. “Daddy,” you whined.

“Stop,” he commanded with a spank. Then he squeezed his hand between your legs and your thighs opened for him. He pushed your panties to the side and slid his middle finger into your cunt. “Be quiet.” He wedged his other hand under your cheek and fed you his thumb. He closed his eyes and held you still.

For the rest of the ride, you laid still and drifted off with his finger inside you and his thumb between your lips.

--------

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Thank you for reading 💚

[denwritesandcries]

One rock a day keeps the Wilderness away – L.M

Pairing: lottie matthews x fem!reader

Summary: The last thing you expected to happen after a plane crash was for your girlfriend to end up becoming some kind of cult leader fascinated by amulets made of the weirdest and shiny things like a damn owl, yet here you are.

Word count: 1,7k.

Content: 96/wilderness timeline, cursing, pet names, fluff and corny, comfort, skeptic!reader, lottie and reader are secretly little haters.

Note: I guess you could say that I simply love writing fluff and cuddles.

English is not my first language.

If there was one thing everyone at Wiskayok High School was aware of, it was that Lottie Matthews was rich as fuck.

She always wore the most expensive clothes, there was a driver who picked her up at the door and took her everywhere, her house was simply giant and some dare to say that a butler was the one who met them at the door and served them drinks on the nights she had her parties.

The thing is, Lottie was a bit... weird, for a rich girl, which meant that she wasn't as popular at school as she could’ve been. She didn't exactly fit the bad girl role, but she wasn't quite a preppy either, with her extravagant bows and tiaras being the most luxurious thing she would actively display. She was distant at best.

This made you, at the beginning of your relationship, try to spoil her in every way possible, not being able to believe that this sweet and out of reach person could reciprocate your feelings so genuinely when she could have just anyone, so, in addition to showering her with affection, you also showered her with gifts. Accessories, especially. Earrings, necklaces, bracelets, until you understand that jewelry really wasn't her thing, since despite accepting everything with affection, she simply left them stored insisting that you didn't spend your money on it. Lottie was much more appreciative of the little things you gave and did for her.

Now, the last thing you expected was for her to develop a taste for accessories in the damn wilderness of all places.

“Baby, I’m not wearing a necklace with a damn bone hanging from it to go hunting.”

It turns out that, like almost everything involving Lottie, her way of demonstrating her new preferences – maybe hobbies? – was also not very usual and you hadn't exactly taken anything of the royal jewelry type for a trip that was supposed to be quick.

“But I chose and made it for you! Will keep you safe out there, I feel it.”

Oh, yeah. There was also the fact that your girlfriend was perhaps slowly going a little mad and becoming the leader of a religious cult that your teammates were a part of and that she wanted you to participate too.

“Jesus Christ, Lot.”

You didn't want to encourage her. The worry was eating you alive and it's only gotten worse since she confided in you that she finally ran out of her meds.

You, unlike your other teammates, were aware that the things Lottie said or did lately were much more influenced by her own condition than any other truly supernatural factor – as much as you couldn't deny that the cabin and the forest gave you goosebumps –, which made you really stressed and irritable with all your friends as they started to believe in things that didn't exist and put pressure on your girlfriend for answers as if she were some kind of prophet.

You managed to keep everything under control and keep her from straying too far from reality to a certain point, but then the whole situation with the group being attacked and Van being seriously injured happened and so nothing you did could convince Lottie that there was nothing what she could have done about it and that only seemed to encourage her more when the redhead recovered enough to confide you all that she should have listened to the feeling Lottie had and that she felt safer with the “amulet” she received from her.

The result is that you are now the target of Lottie's worries and she insists that you wear the charms and trinkets she makes.

It's actually quite cute, you've caught her once or twice sitting by the fire trying to figure out how to tie a knot that won't snap the cord, her eyes glazed over and focused. You could use it, as bizarre as it would be, if it was just a silly gift from your girlfriend, but since that's not what it is, you don't want to put even more things in her head in case something actually happens.

“But then what’s going to protect you when you leave?” Lottie asks, head tilted to the side in alarm and you can only notice how her bangs fall over her eyes in a messy and cute way.

“Maybe the gun I always carry with me?”

However, it was becoming difficult not to encourage her in any way, because aside from bones or occasionally some different plants, Lottie also seemed to see signs in anything that stood out a little, like the bright and colorful rocks you had made a habit of bringing at her, guarding everything that caught her attention like a damn owl.

It started as a silly thing, with a cracked and shiny rock you found near the lake the day you guys found the cabin, you cleaned it and handed it to her with a shy smile, like it was one of your gifts back home, just to cheer her up a little and since then she kept the rock with her at all times – even if sometimes she woke up twitching because she ended up lying against it in the middle of the night. That seemed to turn the key and over the next few days you noticed that she spent time looking for new types nearby the house and so you committed to bringing all the pretty items she might like when you went on your hunts with Natalie, from strange rocks to little crystals lost along the way, just because she looked so happy when you handed them to her.

You think her cute gesture turned into more of a paranoia like 'one rock a day keeps the wilderness away', but at least it makes her more relaxed and happy on days when everything is bad.

One day you return to the cabin with Natalie in tow looking very upset because you've come back empty-handed again and your head is drooping with exhaustion and frustration. When you finally enter Lottie is waiting for you with an appreciative, warm look in her face.

“Did you get anything?” she asks, wrapping her arm around you and guiding you both to your usual corner so you can sit side by side.

You mumble negatively and bury your head in her neck. She rephrases the question when she notices your discouragement:

“Did you get anything for me?”

You sigh, smiling at her, “That I did.”

Lottie watches you curiously as you move to take something out of your pocket and show it to her and you notice the exact moment she registers what’s in your hand.

“A quartz.” She takes it from you like it’s the most fragile thing in the world, “It’s a pink quartz.”

“Is it?” You ask, stifling a yawn with your hand, “I don't know a thing about those stones and stuff, just thought it was pretty and you would like it.”

“Well, I do like it very much. Thank you.” Lottie gives you a soft smooch on the cheek, “And it's not a stone, baby, it's more like a gem or a crystal.”

“Hmm,” you hum in agreement.

She leans her entire weight against your body and smiles innocently when you complain: “Misty told me the other day that gems like that mean peace and unconditional love.”

“You've been talking to Misty? About rocks and gems?” You look at her in disbelief.

“I feel really lonely without you here with me, you know?” Lottie shrugged.

You felt a little guilty and moved closer, leaving a kiss on her shoulder.

“I'm sorry, Lot. I miss you when I'm away too,” you murmur, rubbing her arm in comfort, “Why don't you tell me about your day?”

Lottie rolls her eyes in a way that reminds you so much of the days when you guys would get together to talk shit about everyone you knew in these stupid parties that your heart skips a beat.

“Ugh, if I hear Mari complain about one more damn thing, I’m going to tell you to stop chasing bears and order everyone to serve her for dinner.”

“Please, don’t.” You snort a dumbfounded laugh, “They might actually do it.”

You end up lying down with her curled up and facing you, gently drawing small circles on your hand.

“Got something in your mind?”, you brush some strands of hair from her face affectionately.

“I just have no idea what to do with… them,” she shrugs hesitantly.

You know what she means immediately and move to take her face in your hands, feeling her lean into your touch.

“Oh, Lottie.”

“I know what you and Nat do for us is very important, but I wish you didn't have to,” she mumbles, as if she were confiding a secret, getting impossibly close to you. “I wish you would stay here, with me, where it is safe. Is it too selfish? Want to keep you all to myself?”

You let out a shaky breath, not trusting your own voice when you can feel her breath against your lips like this.

“Well, if Shauna can hide her diary in the attic like a freak then I guess you're allowed to keep some things to yourself too, hun.” You stutter, feeling your skin heat up in embarrassment.

“But you're not a thing.” Lottie wrinkles her nose.

“You can keep me anyway, I don’t mind.” You shrug this time, faking indifference to make her laugh.

And she does, “Babe!”

Just when everything is silent and you think Lottie has slept with your legs wrapped around hers and using your arm as a pillow, she speaks again:

“You know, my new quartz would make a really cute necklace.”

“Lot,” you yawn against her hair.

“Will you use it if I make one?” She looks at you, blinking her big brown eyes in the most convincing way possible, “Just this one, please, for me?”

You sigh, “Yes, Lottie. I'll use your magic stone.”

She deflates, “Don’t talk about it like it’s crack, babe.”

Lottie kisses you slower than usual before you leave as she finally notices the pink gem hanging from your neck and you happily ignore Natalie's mockery as you run after her to catch up to the forest.

[littleplantfreak]

Run my hands through - Umemiya Hajime

Made a post about how much i loved Ume with his hair down yesterday and ended up writing something entirely self indulgent //gestures at this official art too

-SFW (but almost wasn't I almost got super carried away but deleted it cause I leave smut to the professionals) so uhhh marking/hickeys, hair pulling, makin' out with Umemiya and slightly possessive behavior on readers part but in a silly way if that makes sense just in case anyone has problems with that stuff.

You're looking at him more than usual. Umemiya can feel your eyes boring into the back of his head while he's re-potting plants on the roof. He asked you about it before but all you do is hum and say you think you're staring a normal amount. Of course he doesn't mind, but it feels like he's under a microscope. When he asked Kotoha if she knew why you were acting weird, she shrugged and said you'd were looking at some old pictures at the children's home so maybe you'd just been noting how different he looked in his childhood pictures. She ended it with a look and tone that conveyed you'd already asked her to keep something secret.

-----

It's his hair again. The hair that's always gelled back in a slight wave keeping it out of his face completely. It's not hard to break it free from the glassy prison he molds it into though. There have been plenty of times strands fell forward from sweating, working or fighting, but you've never seen it fully down in person. That's why, when you saw a semi-recent picture of him with his siblings, long hair falling in his face, trimmed neatly with ends blunt, you started to feel a certain way about it. You innocently asked Kotoha if she had any more pictures of Ume like that.

"Like what?"

"Like with his hair down."

"Oho you have a thing for his hair now?" She teases and although you know she won't tell him if you ask her not to, you're still embarrassed at being found out so easily.

"He's my boyfriend! I have a thing for nearly everything about him."

"But anyone can tell you're kinda obsessed with it with how much you fix and touch it throughout the day. Just ask him to wear it down for you."

It's not that you hadn't thought about it, but the more you thought, the more you started getting frustrated. Why didn't he wear it down more often? It seems like he did in old pictures. If he hated it now you didn't wanna force him to change it

Your self control was pretty good, but once you'd started really looking it was impossible to stop. His most recent fight with Shishitoren had haphazard strands in his face dislodged by sweat and aggressive movement. Of course you were concerned with the wounds spanning across his face and body, but another part of you wanted to eat him alive with how good he looked. You're not quite sure you'd be able to stop yourself from jumping him if you saw him with his hair fully down. Sitting in a chair on the roof, you watch him and think about the feeling of running your fingers through his white locks unhindered by that damn tough gel he puts in.

"Pumpkin can you hand me the small pruning sheers to your left?" he calls over without looking over at you.

"Mhmmm," you barely reply still stuck in a daze.

Pruning sheers...

Right!

You snap out of the daydreams that'd been haunting you to stand and grab them. Just as you're about to hand them over, Umemiya grasps the wrist with the sheers and pulls gently but firmly to drag you down on the ground with him. He sets the sheers down before taking both your hands in his.

"Something on my face? You've been starin' an awful lot."

"Ahh dirt, if I had to guess," a halfhearted excuse while your brain continued to process things slower than usual.

"Sweetheart baby love of mine," he is all dramatics now stringing pet names together in a silly amalgamation. Once he starts making direct eye contact it's hard to look anywhere else, "you have got to tell me whats going on in that beautiful head of yours. I love the attention but if something's bothering you-"

"It's your hair!" You spit out in a panic, drawing your hands away to cover your face in embarrassment. You can tell he's a little worried and it makes you feel even worse for making a big deal about it.

"My hair bothers you?" He's confused. Of course he is. It isn't something you've brought up in the past after all. He thought you liked his hair since you were always fixing it for him and you do. Your voice is muffled by your hands but he can still understand to a point.

"It looks great and I love it, but I reaaallly wanna see it down," you can hear yourself whining the words instead of saying them normally. "You always have it up when you're at school," taking a deep breath as your hands come off your face to speak more clearly. "I was looking at pictures with Kotoha and they're pretty much all of you with your hair down." Taking a second you twirl one of his loose strands around your finger in lieu of staring again, sincerely embarrassed you let it get to you this bad. He finally puts the pieces together from his conversation with Kotoha earlier.

"Our date night's tomorrow right? I'll wear it down then," he says, letting you mess with his hair. He can see a jolt go through you at his words and you lock eyes with him immediately.

"Really? Really really?" You're just about vibrating in place, grabbing his face with both hands and squishing his cheeks.

"Rweawy rweawy rweawy!" His breath is coming out of his nose in amused puffs due to the quick shift in enthusiasm and your hold on his face.

"I'VE GOTTA GO PICK MY OUTFIT OUT OH MY GOD ILOVEYOUBYE!" A small peck on the nose and you're gone like the wind throwing open the door and running past Sugishita who was on his way up the stairs. The long haired boy looks back at Umemiya with wide, questioning eyes before letting the moment pass, his head dips in the usual greeting before he walks over to do the daily gardening tasks.

_____

“I changed my mind we can’t go out tonight.”

“Babe you’re all dressed up and you were so excited to check out that new restaurant near the park,” Hajime sighs exasperated. You’re in the foyer of his home, hands on both sides of the door frame blocking his escape.

“Not looking like that you aren’t! Do you want every girl in a 20 mile radius to fall for you? The men too? I’ll have to fight every single one of them and of course I’d win but imagine the casualties! The collateral damage!” you cry hanging your head in fake hysterics. Both Kotoha and their other siblings have been watching this two-part comedy special for about 10 minutes now, two minutes of which you just STARED at him. Then you began circling like a hawk looking at him from any and all angles as if to commit it to memory. Then you started laying on the compliments and pick up lines but he could tell you meant every one of them. “Who is this absolute knock out in front of me? Is my boyfriend a model now? Did it hurt when you fell because I’m staring at an angel.”

Which brought you both to the current scene and while you were (for the most part) joking, you also…weren’t. You could and probably are just extremely biased but GOD you think no one could pull off that hair quite so well. Usually it takes a lot to make Umemiya blush, but his face is currently stained red by how brazen you are at the moment. He’s smiling and trying to take it in stride but even Kotoha can tell he’s affected by your display and she's relishing it.

“No more arguing,” he picks you up by the waist and hoists you to him in a hug that leaves your face in his chest and feet off the floor. “We’re heading out now.” He sends a farewell back to your amused audience and the kids yell back a cacophony of teases and calls for their onee-san and onii-san to come back soon. You start muffling unrecognizable words into his shirt before he puts you down as he gets further down the street.

“It would’ve been one of the best ways to die if i’d stayed there a little longer,” you breathe and stumble back a bit.

“You are shameless today,” he laughs and goes to hold your hand. Anyone watching you both can tell you're grossly in love by the dreamy look on your face as you watch him while you walk down the street. You realize now that this is the first time in about two weeks you have him to yourself, which may be why you've been clingier than normal. Every time either of you tried to schedule date night with the other, someone or something came up and made you push date night back.

Going two weeks without any prolonged physical contact (save for hello and goodbye hugs or kisses) with your boyfriend has made you starved for him in every way your brain can fathom, which is why it isn't surprising that you end up dragging him through the park to an alcove you know isn't traveled to often. It also isn't surprising when you sit him down on the bench bracing a knee next to him, and pinning him loosely in place. He doesn't say a word, but tilts his head up slightly angled in favor of you closing the distance, daring you with those stormy grey eyes.

Your hands find their way easily to the soft ivory of his hair, delving deeper to twist and pull him in. Caught between a sigh and a moan, Umemiya Hajime is melting into you, lines blurring and nerves on fire. His hands fumble to grab the thigh closest to him as he moves you to straddle him. You haven't let up on your assault on his senses, fingers loosening their hold to rub small circles into his scalp.

Is this how you feel when he goes all out after stress starts to take it's toll on him? Now that he thinks about it he's always been the one to initiate this kind of thing, but god he would've asked you to take the lead sooner if he knew it felt this good. Heartbeat thrumming through his hands, he runs them in a soothing pattern from the top of your hip to you knee giving your legs the occasional extra squeeze.

A wave of calm shifts the clouds filling your head out as you have an idea. Parting from him briefly you start kissing and mouthing your way down to the collar of his shirt. He squeezes your thighs harder as your breath ghosts his neck and you give it a few experimental nips before cooling the spot with your tongue. He's trying to stifle a high pitched noise in the back his throat but once you hear it you latch on biting and sucking a single bright red mark. A soft breath over your work before you sit back to admire it. The mark peeks out just enough for you to see it right now but low enough that when he's wearing his furin jacket, he'll be able to hide it.

"That was-," you start, still breathless.

"Wow," he voice cracks at the same time. His eyes are a little wild but his hair is even wilder, sticking up in some directions and falling flat in others. Giving a small tap on his arm he releases the deathgrip he had on you before his eyes stick right to where he had been holding. Blue bruises are scattered over both legs where his fingers were, but they're just barely hidden once you fix your dress.

"Guess we're uh...even?" you're suddenly bashful at what was probably the same type of stare you've been giving him for a week straight now. Umemiya runs his own hands through his hair trying to catch his breath and make himself a little more presentable too.

"No way are we close to being even you little monster. After dinner I'm getting you back," and you can tell he's not bluffing.

"I'm shaking in my shoes Haji," you shot back feeling a bit more like yourself as you go to grab his hand. He moves towards you but you end up spun around and he picks you up for the second time that night, this time settled on carrying you bridal style.

"Put me down," you squeak in warning, the skirt of your dress no longer hiding the fresh bruises.

"This is part of your punishment sweetheart. Also, no one's coming after me if I carry you around like a princess right?" It was hard to argue with that logic and to be fair, despite your earlier boldness your legs ended up weak. He had probably seen the shaky steps you took towards him a second ago.

Both of you got to the restaurant in time despite the detour and the next day you were sporting a hoodie to hide the payback you took happily after.

[slvttyplum]

my glorious queen plum🙏🏾🙏🏾would you be ever so kind and write a jealous toji fic? i understand if you’re busy and can’t get to this my queen but it would be very much appreciated if you did😍😍😍🙏🏾🙏🏾😊😊😊🫶🏾🫶🏾🫶🏾

toji didn't usually get jealous, but when he did, it was a shitshow. he did everything in his power to hold back the feelings he got when he saw someone a little bit too close for comfort near you and doing this weird thing called talking. he didn't like it; he loved when there were clear boundaries between not only him and other people but you and other people as well, and when those boundaries got crossed, it wasn't a good time—well, maybe for you.

one jealous fuck was nothing compared to the hundreds he had lined up because of everyone who tried to talk to you.

he didn't like to fuck you out of spite, but sometimes he just had to. you had a place, and he had to put you in it for you to understand. yes, most of the time the jealousy didn't come directly from what you were doing, but he always found himself having to prove to you time and time again whose pussy that was.

sometimes you would just get too close for comfort with the person you were with, and he would just go off the rails, snatching you up to take you home and fucking you until your legs were numb and you were blabbering, soaking in your fluids mixed with his cum. looking at you with piercing eyes, just to fuck you all over again.

some would say that he fucked you out of anger, but it was pure spite. if someone even walked up to you to utter one word, you should be walked away, but here you were with that beautiful smile on your face, speaking to said person. 

you were caught on to how mad he got when he would fuck you after, and it felt so fucking good it had you moaning his name and the neighbors banging on the wall, telling him you would never do it again, but you were lying off your ass. you were going to do it again until you were satisfied. you couldn't help that the mad look that he got on his face whenever he would fuck you was sexy.

toji could get his emotions under control like a normal person, but he didn't want to. seeing you close to just anyone brought a boiling rage inside his body that he couldn't get rid of. luckily, he had an outlet for his anger, and that was you. instead of just causing a scene with said person, he caused a scene in bed with you, which was way more fun.

after fucking you for hours on end, he didn't really know what he gained from it besides getting you to cum on his dick multiple times; all he knew was that it felt good to rough you up a little. you didn't know what he gained either, but you loved it, craved it, and yearned for the sex where he was putting you through the mattress and making sure he fit every inch deep inside of you.

"is this what you wanted? hm? talk to me." while pushing himself into your sweet spot continually, you were so high on the pleasure that's all you could say—yes,  that's exactly what you wanted. for him to fuck you out of your mind and make your legs sore.

sometimes sensual and slow wasn't always for you. you wanted him to pick you up and just fuck you, so you would have to take realistic measures to ensure that was going to happen, so you had to make him jealous. even when it was clear that he was trying not to get mad, he just failed miserably. 

sometimes jealousy was a good thing.

[kismets-barista]

Hold onto your Stetson, @ohposhers; have I got some personal HickDory lore for you 😎💜🌟🫧

Excuse the insanity for those who don't feel compelled towards these two

SO!

Hickory and JD met a few good years before the events of the World Tour when Dory was traveling to find Lonesome Flats, got heatstroke and passed out in the desert. Wakes up to Hickory shadowed in the flickering light of a campfire beneath a canopy of the brightest stars he'd seen since the Neverglades, but it wouldn't be until QUITE a few months later until they really started developing crushes against each other. (Cowboy under the stars, you'd think he'd fall right then and there, right? 🌟)

Why was Hickory already in Lonesome Flats, you might ask? Where was Dickory?

In a glue trap, I say in response. Hickory came from Yodelsberg (is there a canonical name for this?) for international study and to learn about new music. He fell in love with country because yodeling and country music are actually quite gorgeous together. She Taught Me to Yodel, anyone?

Delta Dawn obviously didn't take to Dory showing up and around the town, but after some convincing by Hickory and lots of proving himself (plus a vulture attack that resulted in John Dory saving the very young niece of Delta Dawn- Clampers-) he 'earned' a place there and began to work around town.

It was weird for him.

He'd never quite settled down, until then.

(Now, the specific timeline, yearly I mean is a little muddled because I'm still crafting this, but I'll put them out about three years, now.)

John Dory was still living in Lonesome Flats, and he'd started a relationship with Hickory. They loved each other, as my cohort in crime @protagonist-art (CHECK OUT THEIR ART I LOVE THEM SM MUAH) has Hickory tell John when we get write them, "More than the moon loves the ocean." As surely as the tide pulls in and out, so the lovers return to each other.

So Via, what does Hickory think about BroZone?

Oh, my sweet star.

He doesn't know.

After returning to the devastated Troll Tree, John Dory lost a piece of his heart in the damaged pod they used to live in. It was the first time he went grey, and the memories of his brothers started shifting from what was, to what would never be again. He couldn't find it within himself to talk about them, and has his secrets.

But so does Hickory.

Girl wdym stop being so mysterious.

Heh. I know. It's just a glimpse into my dark mind /ref. Anyways, Hickory never told John Dory he was a Yodeler troll. (Another piece of lore that Quizzy and I worked on together and I think it's brilliant.)

Huh? Aren't they in a long-term relationship? Won't this cause issues later on if they don't share these things with each other?

Oh, they love every aspect of each other too much for their bond to truly be broken.

And yet.

One morning, years after just living and loving, John Dory wakes up with a massive headache and nausea.

"Maybe it's that horse that kicked me yesterday, could've gotten me harder than we both thought."

"Lemme check for a knot, Darlin'."

No knots, but there was an egg.

🌟 (Here I'll say that I'm massively in love with the headcanon that trolls conceive through true love- it isn't quite necessary for them to physically do anything unless they want to. Just them, wholeheartedly trusting and putting everything into their relationship and pouring their heart out to their partner.)

They were absolutely ECSTATIC, and rightfully terrified in their own ways. Neither of them were looking for children but not against it, and after resting for a few days they began to plan. A nursery in the house, baby books with millions of names scattered on the coffee table, toys and cute little baby clothes for when the little one hatched.

Wanna know two of the names John Dory had in mind? Rhonda and Dolly.

They were ecstatic until the night John Dory woke up absolutely ill and with a pit in his stomach.

They lost the egg, and it was the second time John Dory went grey in his life.

A week after this had happened, John Dory left a bundled lock of his hair at Hickory's nightstand and did what he knows how to do all too well. He ran.

Hickory never went too far out of Lonesome Flats in the hopes that John Dory would come back. He couldn't imagine what would happen if his love came back and didn't find him there.

The events of World Tour come about, Hickory meets Branch, and travels for the first time since John Dory left.

John Dory continued to travel, until the events of Band Together.

But don't worry, dear readers, for as surely as the tides come in, so will the lovers meet again. 🌟

Aaaand BOOM! That's it! 💜 I've got lore behind the names Rhonda and Dolly as well, and am SO down to answer any questions about them that anyone has. For you, Posh, thank you for asking and helping me to share a story I've been working on, and for everyone else that read this, thank you kindly! I hope that everyone who made it this far has quite a lovely day, or if you didn't, have a lovely day anyways!

Remember to take your meds, drink water, eat something, and stretch!

💜🌟🫧

[bbybaku]

hii! could we get some dabi/touya college boyfriend nsfw and sfw headcanons? thank uu

yall are gonna have to hear me the fuck out on this one okay

the 18+ part is below the cut 🫡

also sorry this took me like 9 months to write lmao

sfw

i think you and touya would be in the same big friend group that likes to drink and party together

okay so touya started off in the dorms of your big ass university as an engineering major and very quickly realized he didn't really fw it

butttttt he did fw the night scene

and his rich father paying him to be there

so touya barely passes freshman year

transfers to the community college down the road

moves into a party house w his boyz

i feel like he would either be like a blue-collar construction worker or a bar back until he's 21 when he can be a bartender

he's kind of a dick but he's also friends w everyone?

he likes fat girls

especially bipoc thic girls

like homeboy likes tits and ass and is not picky

i feel like he's a bit of a dick in an endearing way

like he's a college aged man and he's a lil selfish but you know he doesn't mean it

prob not the best bf all the time

he means well

hes a retired player who met you and is now obsessed with you and only you

yall are also lowkey on and off

but you’re working on it!!

that being said I'm sure he would be nice to you and care about you but he def has issues that he is not addressing

back to our party boy

he would order pizza for the after-party

always hosts the pregame

and the party lol

goes to the clubs !!

occasionally gets drunk and gets in fights (its hot af)

he would be generous w the ~party favors~ if you know what i mean

*wipes nose*

*cough cough*

has probably tried every drug under the sun at least once

so maybe not the best memory lol

like not a bad guy

but probably not the best

always has cigarettes

probably a Marlboro guy

or American spirits

always wearing all-black or all-dark colors

always smells really good

his room is actually really nice like he has a big bed and mood lights and some crystals

goes to the gym often but has a sleeper build

so looks scrawny but has some muscle when he takes his shirt off

prob has a stupid tattoo somewhere

like a cool one on his lower stomach

but also has a tramp stamp of a heart with wings

always has like an ocean sented canlde burning in his bedroom

has the most beautiful fluffy hair that he puts such little effort into

almost always has a 5 o'clock shadow

like does not shave his face consistently enough but he is hot so its okay

he likes to sit with his head between your legs

yall watch movies together often

like actually watch movies

he has a silver nose ring

drives like a red mustang

is prob lowkey a car guy

is not on any social media but is always watching weird youtube videos and texting his siblings

i feel like it’s a fantasy of his to get into a fight for you

like he dreams of some guy trying shit with you only for him to step in at the perfect time and beat the shit out of him

he doesn’t want anything bad to happen to you

but he would beat anyone who hurts you

nsfw

average size but a bit girthy

homeboy can fuck

like is experienced

he’s a retired whore

you are the reason he retired lol

can find the clit on anyone

you don't go home until you come at least once

quickies

all the time

anywhere you can think of

bathroom at parties

unfinished basements

empty classroom

storage closet

prob has a hand signal to you for if yall are out drinking in your group and he wants to fuck

this man oozes sex appeal

like you're not in the mood and then he's wearing all black and smells like that and suddenly you're ferral

real good at dirty talk

"behave"

"that's what I like to hear"

"have you always been this much of a slut?"

just to name a few

talks like that in and out of the bedroom

does not sext but will not hesitate to invite you over when he's horny

fucking in his room during a party

and then returning to the party

will buy you food after

fucks you to hip-hop

like good music

Red LED lights in his room

has a big ass mirror

doggy or pro bono in front of said mirror

*chefs kiss*

does not want kids so he always has a ton of condoms

he doesn't like hickies but loves when you scratch up his back

car sex

he likes to choke you

especially during makeouts

like will choke you more during a makeout than he will during sex

prob lowkey has a porn addiction so can get a little carried away sometimes

but will instantly stop if you say something or if he picks up on you like liking the vibe

he's loud as fuck during sex

like his roommates will pound on the walls

doesn't eat you out super often,, but when he does?

good god

amazing

prob will ask you to do some weird shit every now and then

like clown makeup

or to top him and call him weird names

you're normally down for it

its fun because he gets so into it

is pretty straightforward about what he wants

which is nice since you never have to guess

m.list

[jermer10]

This might be a weird request but can you do one where you're dating the Mercenaries and you figure out your pregnant so you tell them?

TF2 mercs with a pregnant s/o

afab reader | this req wasn't weird at all! thank you op, and i apologize for it taking so long to write! <3

drabbles under the cut :P

Scout: - being the youngest of 8, he wasn't exactly aware of pregnancy signs first hand, though he had heard things from his ma and brothers - so when he noticed you had been sicker, sleeping longer, and having food aversions to things you would otherwise love, he had slowly put pieces of the puzzle together - doesn't wanna bring it up with you, he doesn't want to alarm you, and slyly implies getting a pregnancy test after he sees you vomiting for the 3rd morning that week - when he finds out, he is ecstatic!!! <33333 - would LOVE it if his kids were into baseball, definitely the playing catch in the yard kid of dad - has always been big on having a family, but can't help but also feel incredibly nervous??? - his dad was never there, would he even be a good dad? spoiler alert, he is an amazing dad

Soldier: - completely oblivious to the idea that you could be pregnant, and instead sends you to the infirmary thinking you had just eaten some bad bread - to his complete and utter shock, you came out pregnant - "honey, no, i was already pregnant..." there's no use, he doesn't care who made you pregnant, he was going to be a dad! - is already picturing your white picket fence american life together with 2.5 kids and a dog - doesn't believe in maternity leave, will try to get you onto the battlefield despite the fact that you are seven months pregnant and can barely walk (medic has to explain why you cannot, soldier is outraged) - the kind of guy who really wants a son but is blessed with a daughter instead and ends up having more in common with her - "CAN WE HAVE ANOTHER ONE?" he is so sweet like actually <333

Demoman: - demo is always sick, it comes with the alcoholism - but when you're sick? he is worried, like, extremely worried - at first he thinks it's the flu, maybe gastro? anything but what all the signs point to, please don't be pregnancy - when you show him the positive tests, he holds you and cries - he is so terrified at the idea of being a father, he's an alcoholic, he's never had to take care of anything in his life, not even himself - god, he couldn't bare having to explain the egregious duty of abandoning their child until they come of age, like his parents had done to him, and theirs to them - but, he also really wanted a family with you - he saw how happy this baby would make you, how excited you were to have one with him - when he sees his baby for the first time, he knows that he made the right choice

Heavy: - having three younger sisters, he knew what pregnancy was like - and when his father was executed, he knew he had to protect those sisters as if they were his own children - he absolutely loves the idea of having a small family with you, a peaceful life without bloodshed - so when you come to him, teary eyed, holding what looked like a pregnancy test, he didn't hesitate to embrace you in the most suffocating, loving hug he could muster - "У нас будет ребенок!" he is so incredibly happy - he treats you like royalty, spoils you so hard (as if he didn't already) - his mother and sisters knit you baby clothes!!!! <33333 - will not let anyone near you, he absolutely refuses any harm to you or your baby, if you get sick he ails your illness, if you are hurt he treats your wounds - you are the most precious thing to him, and now so is your baby

Engineer: - it wouldn't come as a surprise to him at all, as you had likely discussed having a baby and trying for one multiple times beforehand - that doesn't stop him from bawling his eyes out anyway - you hold each other for hours, happily crying and giggling about how your future together will look - designs all the baby furniture with added features to make your life easier - feeding bowls that prevent food spillage, chairs that are completely non slip, a baby cradle with an inbuilt monitor and mobile with little wooden tools and machinery - the most proactive father any child could ever want in their lives, he will drop everything to support you and this baby - invests in his kid's hobbies, shows up to every baseball game, every recital, every play

Medic: - medic's never really thought about having kids before - he could honestly live without ever having them - he's giving you a physical, when he notices some of the telltale physical pregnancy signs and decides to give you a test - oh fuck! you were pregnant! - immediate panic mode, he has no idea how to be a father! he offers multiple options for you to undergo surgery to remove it - if you are insistent on having this baby, he decides that he has no choice but to be a dad - at first he ignores this kid, i mean, he is a busy man after all and he never wanted this child in the first place - but this kid follows him EVERYWHERE, and he just cant help but adore the little guy - "ah, it was inevitable really, zhe little scamp just vouldn't leave me alone!" "you know you're allowed to love our kid, right?"

Sniper: - has never wanted kids, it wasn't you, really, he just didn't find them practical - i mean, he lives in a van?? where would you even fit a kid? and surely it wouldn't be healthy to raise one in that sort of environment - he sort of supposes that seeing you holding your baby would be cute, and he wouldn't mind having a little family someday - when you break the news to him, you look visually nervous - shaking, eyes wet and red, probably from crying before you even told him, it breaks his heart seeing you this way - when you finally ask what you should do, despite all common sense, he tells you that he wants to keep the baby - your reaction was all worth it to him - you immediately plan to upsize, looking for a small house together and moving in shortly before the baby is born - he fully comes around to the idea of a child after meeting his own

Spy: - the thought of having a kid turns him off, he is far too emotionally unavailable as it is - you know about scout, and you know the immense guilt and pain spy felt after abandoning him - so when you tell him that you're pregnant, he calmly asks you what you are going to do - he won't talk you out of having the baby, but he will not be active in his child's life whatsoever - you bet that he will, and so, he takes you up on that bet - he has no intent on leaving you despite not wanting this kid, if anything the idea of proving you wrong amuses him more - then, when you aren't around, he spends time with the kid, clothes it, feeds it, plays with it - and when you come home and see them together, it's safe to say he had lost the bet

[milaisreading]

Isagi sister y/n x Sae? She was in love with y/n for a long time and he was planning to confess to her. While all this time y/n was thinking that Sae was gay for Shidou after she saw their matches together. When he confessed to her, y/n told him that isn't he is gay for Shidou.

🌱🩷: I was supposed to be studying this morning, but your idea was funny so I had to write it. Thanks for the request!

Warnings: Reader uses she/her. Requests are open

⚽️Blue Lock belongs to Muneyuki Kaneshiro and Yusuke Nomura ⚽️

"Hmmm..." Sae muttered as he looked at the screen of his phone. Over the past few days that was how most people could find him, just sitting and looking at his phone. From time to time, his expressions would change, but that was only if you looked at him fast enough. A lot of people might say it was pre-final game jitters, but whoever knew Sae enough knew that wasn't true. Rin, Isagi, and Shidou would sometimes ask if je was ok, but all they would get is a short nod from him.

'I hope he won't be acting weird tonight. We really need to have his head in the game if we want to win the World cup.' Rin sighed as he received another short nod from Sae.

"What's up with Undereyelashes senior? Did you two have another fight?" Shidou snickered, earning an annoyed look from Rin. But, before the younger could yell back at him, Isagi stepped in between them. They didn't need all of this hours before their final game with Germany!

"Just calm down everyone. Let's leave Sae-san alone for now."

'Be honest when confessing, and also be smooth about it?' Sae frowned as he read through the guide.

'I hate these internet advice sites.' Sae groaned, putting the phone away and rubbing his eyes. He was tired, very tired from all the training, but also from keeping all these emotions under wrap for the past few months. Sae Itoshi wasn't someone who saw himself falling in love with anyone, heck, he never saw himself having a crush! But, here he was, hours before his final game at the World cup, he was busy figuring out a way to confess his feelings for (Y/n).

'This is ridiculous. I should have done this before the game. But, only if I win tonight will I see myself worthy of her.' Sae shook his head as a blush spread across his face.

"I will take a walk." The rehead muttered to himself as he walked out of the room Rin  Shidou, and he shared.

"Are you not nervous? The final game kept mom, dad, and I up all night." The older Itoshi froze in his footsteps as he heard the voice of the one person that's been haunting his thoughts for the past months.

'(Y/n)...' Sae gulped as he observed her and Yoichi's interaction.

"I was nervous days prior, now I am just numb to everything." Yoichi shrugged his shoulders as (Y/n) poked his cheek.

'Wish she would do that to me-Is that Yoichi's jersey she is wearing?!' Sae gulped as he noticed the familiar clothing item, which caused a weird wave of jealousy to hit him.

"Hm?" Feeling eyes on them, (Y/n) turned to look at Sae, and gave him a smile and wave.

"Sae-san! Ready for the game later?!"

Yoichi looked back as well, noticing the blush on the older's cheeks.

"You finally got out of your room?"

"Finally?" (Y/n) asked in confusion, but instead of getting an answer, the boy turned around and quickly walked away.

"Maybe he is nervous?" (Y/n) suggested, watching in sadness as Yoichi chuckled a little.

"Hard to imagine. He basically breaths football." He answered back, earning a nod from (Y/n).

'I think he might be panicking because him and Shidou are in the same team again. After all, I know all to well how it feels to be close to someone you love, but can't tell them that.' She thought as her expression fell a little.

'I wish he liked me like I like him. But, Shidou is the one he wants.'

"Let's go and get some food. I can't play on an empty stomach." Yoichi said as he pulled (Y/n) towards the exit.

"Sure..."

'Maybe,in another life he would like me back.'

Meanwhile, Sae was having a small breakdown in the bathroom.

'That smile... shit, it's so cute! She is so sweet and caring, how can one not fall for her.' Sae thought as he washed his face, hoping the cold water might help his blush.

"That smile, the voice, the eyes, everything is way too ethereal about her. I need to get this off of my chest as soon as possible." Sae took a few deep breaths.

"Shit, get your head into the game, Sae. You can't embarrass yourself in front of (Y/n) tonight."

A few hours later, the game was about to start. The stadium had a special euphoria haunting it, something neither the Japanese or German team felt before. Was it because it's the final game? Was it the loud cheers from the Japanese fans? They didn't know, but they definitely enjoyed it... some more than the others.

"Sae-chan! Ready for the game? You finally got off your high horse?!" Sae flinched as Shidou jumped on his back and yelled into his ear.

"Get off!" Sae yelled, shoving Shidou off of his back and looked back to where (Y/n) was sitting (he had to beg Yoichi to tell him where her seat was). Sending her a small wave, the girl returned it, then she looked back to where Yoichi was.

"YO-CHAN, DO YOUR BEST!!"

Sae sighed dreamily as he heard her yell, ignoring the small jealousy he felt for Yoichi at the moment.

'I wish she would cheer me on like that.'

"I WILL!!" Yoichi was heard yelling back, looking away from Kaiser for a moment.

"Hmm? Who is that? Your girlfriend?" Sae froze for a moment as he heard Kaiser's voice, then looked at the blonde, who had an amused smirk as he stared back at (Y/n).

'Don't look at her, you creep.' The redhead narrowed his eyes and walked over to where Kaiser and Yoichi were.

"Eww! That's my older sister, you dumbass." The blue-eyed boy cringed, which only amused Kaiser more.

"Even better, then. Hope the cutie will not faint from all the magnificent goals she is about to witness from me."

Hearing his words Yoichi recovered from his disgust and sent a warning glare in Kaiser's direction.

"Stay away from her."

"And if I don't?" Kaiser challenged as Sae arrived at Yoichi's side.

"Just shut up. The game is about to start."

Although his voice sounded monotone, that was far from what he felt inside.

It was a tiring 95 minutes of the game. With Sae, Rin, and Yoichi scoring on one side, and Kaiser and Ness on the other, but they made it. Neither the players or the fans could believe it. Japan actually won the Cup. The players of the Japanese team collapsed on the ground after Yoichi scored the final goal, too tired and excited to do much, while the fans were the ones erupting in screams of joy and crying.

"YOICHI!! YOU DID IT!!" The said boy laughed a little as (Y/n) ran up to give him a tight hug, tears streaming down her own face.

"I am so proud of you!" She cried out as Yoichi hugged her back.

"Thanks... without you and our parents' support I wouldn't be here." The boy said back as they separated.

"You are too humble." She pouted, but before she could say anything else, Sae interrupted the conversation.

"(Y/n), can I talk to you for a moment?" The boy asked, looking oddly nervous to the two siblings.

"Sure." She nodded her head as Sae led them to a more private area, or at least a spot where there were no cameras.

"What did you need? And congrats on winning! Your goal earlier was amazing!!" (Y/n) said, which boosted Sae's ego even more up.

"Thanks, glad that you liked it. But, I called you here to talk about something else."

"What is it?" (Y/n) wandered, part of her wanting to ask why he was with her, when he could be celebrating with Shidou.

'Maybe he needs dating advice?' She mused.

"I wanted to tell you this for a while now... I really like- I mean, love, I really love you."

(Y/n)'s eyes widened in shock and her face turned red as Sae continued.

"You are always so calm and kind to others, you were even kind to me after I acted like a jerk the first time we met. I am not really one to fall in love, I never imagined myself in this position, but I am glad that it is you who I fell for."

"Sae... wait, so... so you don't like Shidou-san?" She asked, trying to process everything. Sae stopped talking and looked at the girl in bewilderment.

"Why would I like him of all people?"

"It's just... you both look so close. And your interactions during the U-20 match, I thought that you like him..." (Y/n) admitted, nervously playing with her fingers. Sae was pretty much speechless for a good 2 minutes, ignoring everyone around himself as he sighed.

"I only love you. Shidou is a friend, I will admit that, but I don't see hin as anything more." Sae spoke as he took her hands into his. (Y/n) got more flustered as she avoided Sae's eyes for a moment, but eventually spoke up as well.

"I.... I love you as well. I have for a while now." She stuttered out while looking up at Sae. The boy felt a variety of emotions hit him, but the one that stood out the most was happiness. Pure, utter happiness.

"That makes you mine, from now on. And I will be yours." He said, kissing the embarrassed girl on the cheek.

"I am glad then." She laughed a little.

[tsukimefuku]

bread for breakfast ꕥ higuruma hiromi

summary: hiromi decides to walk down to his favorite bakery before heading to morioka and ends up bumping into nanami.

tags: jujutsu kaisen, higuruma x reader, implied past nanami x reader, angst, hurt with no comfort, a talk between two characters i like a lot.

wc: 1.2k

notes, etc.: i began writing this to the sound of sayonara bye bye, by mawatari motsuko, and wound up finishing it to the sound of back to the old house, by the smiths. so yeah, that should be an indication of the feels this relates to.

ꕥ collection of stories: "jujutsu partners au"

→ masterlist for fics listed in chronological order of events

Hiromi walked down the street holding the sunflower you gave him on one arm, carrying a small duffle bag with some clothes in the other. He walked slowly, dragging himself along, defeated and looking down, trying to distract his mind from the break-up.

Especially from the recent memory of your asleep face as he stepped out of the room for one last time, and out of your life for God knows how long.

How long?

He shook his head involuntarily. Hiromi didn't want to even spare a thought on this matter, considering everything else was a private hell in and of itself.

I should have put this flower inside a bag, he thought for a moment. Hiromi managed to leave most of it all at his former apartment, but he couldn't leave the sunflower you gave him, as much as he wanted to — he knew the mere sight of it every day would be painful, but he figured it was better than having no piece from your story at all by his side.

The sorcerer had decided to eat something for breakfast, and slowly but surely made his way towards the bakery he had been at sometimes before. This was where he wanted to have his last Tokyo meal before heading to Morioka. Maybe they still have that ciabatta with pesto…

Still on an uncertain stride, it really took every fiber of his being to not turn around and run back to his apartment and throw himself into bed with you, to not snuggle his face against your hair, embracing your waist, giving up on this stupid, idiotic endeavor. His heart pounded achingly against his chest, even if his tired expression showed no indication of pain.

Hiromi didn't turn back, though, thanks to and because of you.

Upon entering the bakery, however, he was taken by surprise — a surprise he didn't really know if it was welcome or not at this very moment.

About to exit the vicinity, the ratio sorcerer held a paper bag of baguettes with a cup of coffee on one side, and had a small bag with his morning sandwich on the other.

"Higuruma?"

"Good morning, Nanami" he exhaled, feeling a weird vulnerability stinging under his skin at the sight of a familiar face. Hiromi wasn't ready to meet anyone before heading out, and intended to smooth over the details of his departure from Tokyo with Gojo through the phone.

They stood there for a few moments, and Nanami noticed Hiromi seemed beaten up underneath the surface. The man had huge bags under his eyes and avoided making direct eye contact, unconsciously clutching the sunflower against his chest. Hiromi was carrying himself with a put-upon expression.

"Can I offer you a cup of coffee?" Nanami inquired, stepping aside to ease people's way inside and out of the small business.

"I…" Hiromi pondered, before nodding silently.

***

They were both seated at a tiny coffee table, and Hiromi was unconsciously rubbing his thumb against the sunflower's vase, that now laid on top of his bag.

After explaining to Nanami all that had happened these past few days, especially why he had chosen to leave Tokyo and go to Morioka, Hiromi sighed, waiting for a lecture from his colleague.

However, the lecture never came.

"I see," Nanami acquiesced, "and hope it all goes well for you."

Hiromi scoffed, somewhat disappointed.

"I was hoping you'd lecture me for this, just to give me a final push into changing my mind about leaving."

"You seem to have your mind made up about everything. There's nothing I could say to change your resolution about it."

The former lawyer sighed, and remained silent for a while, as he rolled his now empty cup of coffee on the tips of his fingers.

"You don’t have to leave," Nanami noted. "You could try aiding your former office colleagues from a distance."

"But I do have to leave, though. Otherwise, I wouldn’t be myself," Hiromi stated, "the same way that you wouldn’t be yourself if you hadn't tried to push her away for what you thought would be her own good."

"Hm… What?"

That definitely took Nanami by surprise, and he straightened himself on his chair, clearing his throat, somewhat jarred by the blunt sincerity and situational clarity Hiromi just hit him with. Also, the ratio sorcerer was a little taken aback with the fact that Hiromi — while in a relationship with you — knew you and Nanami had been involved, albeit never treating him with anything but respect and comradery after Nanami stopped holding his own grudge against the man.

"I thought about it a lot, because she never told me what happened between the two of you," he began, "not in detail, anyway."

Hiromi paused his speech for a moment, picking his next words.

"Getting to know you better, Nanami, that is what I think happened, and it makes sense to me. You are the kind of person who would do anything to protect other people, even if it makes you miserable, and even if you can't admit it."

Nanami sighed, averting his gaze as Hiromi read him like an open book.

Hiromi realized he was correct, so he proceeded.

"That is your moral selfishness. I guess…. We are both selfish, in our own way. My moral selfishness is not allowing myself to be happy until I feel I’ve paid my due debt." 

Nanami felt sympathy for the former lawyer, even if he couldn't understand the man's impending sense of responsibility.

"I understand your point," Nanami began, "but she would probably say that’s just the story you’re telling yourself."

Hiromi chuckled softly. "She did. Do you end up ignoring most of her advices too?"

"Only when she gives them out, which is not very often," Nanami half jested.

Both sorcerers stood silent for a minute before Hiromi smiled bitterly at himself as he started speaking again.

"It’s true that no jujutsu sorcerer dies without regret, right? I mean, she… I wish I could stay."

“She will be okay, she always is” Nanami reassured him.

“I believe so,” Hiromi answered, having his shoulders dangle down as he considered his next few words.

"I need to ask you for something, Nanami."

The ratio sorcerer remained silent, so he proceeded.

“Don’t let her be alone,” Hiromi asked, glancing at Nanami.

Nanami was considerably surprised, and looked a little incredulous at his colleague. 

“Aren't you both still…?”

“I’ll let you ask her that.”

Nanami pondered for a second, and huffed with the slightest hint of a smile at the irony of it all.

“I remember you once said I was a dignified man. I believe you were wrong about that.”

“Even the best of us have their blind spots, apparently,” Hiromi concluded, as he lifted himself. "I need to take my train now."

Nanami also got up, and extended his hand towards Hiromi, much to the other's surprise.

"You have become a fine jujutsu sorcerer. I hope you get to come back to Tokyo, eventually" he stated, as Hiromi acquiesced to the gesture and gave him a handshake.

"I hope for that, too."

–

End notes:

Well, the events that explain how this came to happen will be in "old regrets and guilt ridden pasts: part 3", which I've barely scraped the surface of up until this point. Lol

Sorry for the angst guys, but I hope you like it.

[nicoline1998enilocin]

Naughty fantasies | 500 follower special 🖤

Pairing | Boyfriend!Avenger!Bucky Barnes x Girlfriend!Avenger!Fem!Reader

Word count | 2.5K

Summary | Bucky recently discovered a specific fantasy he's been wanting to fulfill. Even though you two have never experimented with roleplaying before, you're instantly on board when he brings up the idea of a Student/Teacher roleplay. It's just not the way you had initially thought...

Warnings | Established relationship ~ boyfriend/girlfriend, use of nickames ~ Doll, Baby Boy, Baby

Smut | Porn with some plot, Bucky watching porn, implied male masturbation, oral ~ M&F receiving, deepthroating, student/teacher roleplay, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it!), Sub!Bucky Barnes at first, but later he takes back control.

A/n | Firstly, I want to apologize that this has taken so long to be posted, life got in the way and with Fluffcember going on too it was hard for me to find the time to write this. But it's here now, and I hope you will all enjoy it! This is written as a thank you and celebration for reaching 500 followers; this one has been chosen by all of you! 🩵

A/n 2.0 | This is proofread by the amazing @mrsbuckybarnes1917, for which I am truly grateful! I also believe this was based on a post from @notafunkiller a while back (please correct me if I'm wrong and it wasn't you!) about wanting to see a student/teacher fic with student Bucky, so I hope this will fulfill at least a little bit of that craving 👀🩵

Events Masterlist | 2. ''Don't tell anyone'' | @the-slumberparty

Banners: @vase-of-lilies | Divider: @firefly-graphics | GIF: Owner

Main Masterlist | Bucky Barnes Masterlist

You've been away on a solo mission for the last three weeks, meaning your boyfriend, Bucky, has been looking for a different way to meet his needs. Not in the form of another woman, but in the form of his fist while watching porn.

The idea of porn was very foreign to Bucky at first, but he has always been curious about it. When he truly couldn't take it anymore, he decided to ask you since there's no one else he trusts more with such a sensitive topic than you.

''Doll? Could you come here for a moment?'' Bucky asks as he's seated on his bed, and you're getting ready for a girls' night out with Nat and Wanda.

You just put on your outfit for the night, and once your heels are on, you're ready to go. During this entire time, Bucky had watched you like a hawk, enjoying every curve of your body when you changed and pouting when you told him you couldn't stay.

If it were up to him, he would have you under him the entire night, making each other cum so many times you don't remember your name, let alone where one person begins and the other ends. But no, you couldn't cancel girls' night again.

''Is everything okay?'' you ask as you walk over to him, putting your hand on his thigh as you look at him with a curious gaze.

''Everything's perfect, but I've been... wondering about something,'' he starts, his voice trailing near the end and a blush creeping onto his cheeks. 

Your eyebrows are slightly raised out of curiosity, and your mind is going a mile a minute as you're trying to think of what could be swirling around in his brain. The following sentence is most definitely not on the list of things to even cross your mind, let alone his.

''Where can I watch porn?'' he said it like it was the most casual thing in the world, like someone asking what's for dinner that night. You nearly choked on your saliva, and after your coughing fit, you looked at him to make sure you heard him correctly.

It turns out that you did.

''Are you okay, Doll? I can ask someone else-'' ''No! I can show you!''

It was unexpected, yes, but you didn't want to give Bucky the feeling that you'd think he was weird or that you weren't okay with explaining these things, too. They're only natural, after all.

And that's how you found yourself explaining to Bucky where he can find free porn, and he has been exploring the wonderful world of online porn.

Ever since that night, he has watched porn a couple of times, usually only when you're away on long missions like you are now. He's been watching one of his usual videos when he stumbles upon something he's never seen before that instantly piques his interest.

Student/Teacher roleplay. After that first video, he has been going down an entire rabbit hole of roleplay porn, but he noticed he gets the most satisfaction from the student/teacher dynamic.

Somewhere along the way, he found out about the dynamics being reversed. It was usually a male being the teachers and a female being the students; in this one, a female teacher was punishing her badly behaving student.

Now, he's trying to find a good way to bring up the fact that he's interested in trying out a little roleplay of his own. It's not something you two have ever tried before, but it's not something you have discussed.

So here he finds himself watching the same video over and over again, his sweatpants on his knees together with his underwear and his fist wrapped around his cock, stroking himself at a leisurely pace.

Despite seeing the video countless times at this point, it never fails to get him off, and this time is no exception if it weren't for the fact that you swung open the bedroom door, just as he was about to reach his climax.

His super soldier hearing had not notified him of your arrival because he screamed when you caught him, his phone flying across the room as he tried to cover himself up.

''D-doll! Fuck! I didn't know you'd be home so soon...'' he mumbles, his face bright red while you walk over to where his phone landed to see if it's okay.

''Please, don't tell anyone!'' Bucky pleads, not wanting everyone to know about the kind of porn he watches. It's nothing illegal or anything, but that doesn't mean he's not embarrassed by it.

''I won't, Bucky; this will stay between us,'' you reassure him as you take off your boots before making your way over to the bed, where he's still waiting for what you're going to do next.

''So, you've wanted to try a little roleplay, huh? Well, you could have just asked me, and I would have happily said yes, silly boy,'' you tell him with a sensual voice.

You take slow steps towards the bed as you pull down the zipper on the front of your Tac suit, exposing your bra underneath.

''But first, do you want me to help with your not-so-little problem?'' you ask him, crawling on the bed and in between his legs before pulling the pillow away, revealing how he's still hard as a rock.

''Y-yes, please,'' he whispers, and without any hesitation, you bend down to give a few licks across his red, weeping tip to lick off the few drops of pre-cum that have gathered.

Your fist wraps loosely around the base, closing your mouth around his tip, sucking softly, and earning yourself a loud moan from your boyfriend that has your pussy clenching around nothing.

Slowly, you work more of him into your mouth and throat until your nose makes contact with his pubic bone, and you're gagging around his length. This turns out the be his undoing, and without so much as a warning, he shoots every last drop of cum into your mouth, letting you swallow every last drop.

''Fucking hell, Doll, you always know how to give a warm welcome-'' he tells you as he's softening and coming down from his high, ''- but now it's my time to give you the same.''

The next day, you and Bucky discussed roleplay and your interest in trying it out. However, this is also when Bucky confessed he would like to be the one receiving the punishment and taking the sub role in this scenario.

Your discussion has led to you searching for an office you could use, which may have resulted in a somewhat awkward situation with Steve. See, you've been trying to figure out if any offices are available with a lock on the door, but you didn't want him to know what you would be doing there.

"So, about the office… Is there one available?" you ask Steve again. It's been about a week since you last discussed it with him.

"Well, there are plenty available, but I can't exactly assign an office to you without knowing what you're going to do there," he tells you, focusing intently on your face. You know he means well, but that doesn't make it any less embarrassing.

"I have some- uhm- personal business? With… Well, with Bucky…" you say, your voice trailing off to a whisper, and that's when Steve finally puts two and two together. It's not about exactly what you would be doing, but it did click why you need an office with a lock.

"Oh! Well, uhm… Yeah! We have- I'll put you on the list; I'll let you know!" he says as his cheeks turn bright red, and with that, he storms off to try and not make the situation any more awkward. You quickly retreat to your bedroom to tell Bucky the excellent news, but you decide not to mention that Steve has an idea about what you will do.

A week later, you find yourself in the office Steve assigned you and Bucky. The door is locked so you two can avoid getting interrupted.

''Are you sure you want to do this? Because you know I'm okay with this, of course, but I care about your wellbeing too, Bucky,'' you tell him before you start.

''I'm sure, Doll. And I have my safeword if anything happens that I'm uncomfortable with,'' he reassures you. This does make you feel a little more at ease, and you need to get a few more things ready before your scene.

You've already changed into your outfit of a tight skirt that barely covers your ass, a white blouse that is about two sizes too small, your boobs and bra on full display, a pair of high stockings, and high heels. The entire look is finished with a high ponytail and your glasses.

''Ready, Baby boy?'' you ask Bucky when everything is ready, and when he notifies you that he's ready, you instantly switch into teacher mode. Suddenly, you're glad you've been a high school teacher for a few years before joining the Avengers.

''Somebody-'' you start with a raised voice ''- has gotten an F on last week's test. And because of that, they will receive a fitting punishment.''

Bucky's eyes instantly go wide at how you naturally slipped into your role. Between your authoritative tone and the way you look, he can already feel himself growing hard in his pants, and he has to adjust himself already.

This doesn't go unnoticed by you, and you walk over to Bucky, your heels clicking loudly on the wooden floor. You lean forward when you're at Bucky's table, and this only makes your boobs stand out more, making Bucky unable to look away from them.

You clear your throat loudly, and his eyes instantly snap up to yours, and he knows he's been caught. A deep red color appears on his cheeks and down his neck, and you can't help but grin at the sight.

''What's the problem, Baby Boy? Am I making you nervous by standing so close?'' you whisper in his ear after leaning in, and you are so close to him that he can smell the perfume you're wearing.

He bought it for you last Christmas, and you only wear it for special occasions. This occasion is very special, and his head reels from the thought.

You get back up, and he instantly misses you being so close, but that feeling is quickly gone when he watches you walk, the fabric of the skirt stretching slightly across your butt.

The sway of your hips has his mouth slightly agape and his hand reaching down to his crotch, palming himself over his jeans to give him the slightest bit of relief.

''Barnes!'' you say, and he quickly pulls his hand above the table. His eyebrows go into his hairline as he looks at you, and you turn around, sitting on your desk with your legs crossed.

''Come over here, Baby Boy, and I will give you your punishment now, so you won't have to go to detention later,'' you tell him, your glasses sliding down your nose as you playfully look over them.

He slides his chair back without hesitation, and before you know it, he's in front of you, the bulge in his pants very noticeable. He's enjoying this even more than you thought he would, and it makes you smile.

''For the first part of your punishment, I want you to sit on your knees, and eat this pussy until I tell you to stop, is that clear?'' you ask him, and he nods.

''Words, Baby Boy,'' you order, and he follows with a soft 'yes.'

''Good boy,'' you tell him as you spread your legs for him, and he sinks to his knees, his hands hooking behind your knees to pull you towards the edge of the desk. A soft gasp leaves your lips, and Bucky spreads your legs wider with his shoulders, opening you up for him.

The skirt you're wearing rides up to your hips, and when Bucky finds out you didn't wear panties for this, he lets out a deep groan. At this point, he's straining almost painfully against the confines of his pants, but since you didn't tell him he could touch himself, he hooks both arms around your thighs as he starts to eat you out like a starved man.

''Oh, fuck! Doing so well for me, Baby Boy,'' you praise him, and with that, he increases his pace even more, alternating between licking your clit and fucking your entrance with his tongue to get every last drop of your arousal.

He groans against your pussy with the praise, and you can never get enough of him eating you out like that. Your fingers are threading into his long locks before pulling him even closer, making your moans only louder.

''Use your fingers, Baby, use your fingers to make me cum-''

He doesn't have to be told twice because as soon as he hears the words 'fingers,' he is suckling on your clit, his fingers crooked inside your pussy.

Within no time, you're trembling as your legs are over his shoulders, your hand in his hair pulling him away as you're overstimulated and unable to keep yourself up at this point.

''F-fuck me, Bucky, fuck me until I can't fucking walk straight anymore,'' you tell him as he's worked you through your orgasm, and he's glad he can finally free himself from his pants.

After a few quick strokes, he's pushing himself into you, and you instantly clench down on him from the stimulation he's giving you. Once you've finally relaxed enough to let him in further, he slides in, bottoming out in one thrust.

The moan leaving your body is nearly pornographic, and it has Bucky going crazy, too. After getting adjusted to you and how tight you are around him, he leans forward and captures your lips in a soft, sweet kiss that is the complete opposite of the pace he's fucking you with.

With his metal arm, he rips your bra and shirt into pieces in a single motion, freeing your breasts from their confines and ready for him to play with. At this point, you know he's taken back all control, but you don't care; all you can think about is his cock deep inside you, hitting precisely the right spot.

''Need your fingers, please!'' you tell him, and his metal arm slides between your bodies, finding your clit without a single problem, while his flesh hand plays with your nipples, tugging and squeezing both in an alternating rhythm that only increases your pleasure.

Before you know it, you're falling over the edge of your second orgasm, and Bucky is following closely after, shooting his cum inside your pussy as he bends over and captures your lips in a passionate kiss.

Your arms are wrapped around his neck, and your legs are wrapped around his waist to keep him as close as possible. The two of you stay like that for a little while until Bucky goes soft, and he pulls out, ready to clean you up.

''So, how about that grade?'' he asks you.

''You deserve an A+ after that performance,'' you tell him, and after he's cleaned you up, you try to stand, but to no avail. Your legs give out immediately, and Bucky has done precisely what you asked.

''Here, take my shirt,'' he tells you as he pulls off his Henley before taking off the remaining pieces of your bra and blouse and throwing them in the trash for you. The soft material of the shirt feels warm against your skin, and Bucky lifts your bridal style, ready to take you to your bedroom.

You lay your head against his shoulder with your eyes closed, letting out a content sigh as you let Bucky take care of you. He makes sure all private parts are covered, and despite a few people giving him odd looks, Bucky keeps walking and giving you soft kisses on the crown of your head occasionally.

''I love you, Doll, and thank you for making my fantasy come true. Next time, I'll help you fulfill one of yours,'' he whispers to you before stepping into the elevator, and you fall asleep, getting a much-needed nap.

The elevator arrives at the floor of your bedroom quickly, and when the doors open, Bucky walks past Steve, who instantly turns bright red at the sight of his best friend holding you as you're wearing his shirt.

Steve turns around and quickly rushes into his bedroom to save himself from more embarrassment, though it is unspoken between all three of you that this will never be mentioned to anyone.

It's a good thing you left your bedroom door unlocked - your valuable stuff is always put away safely - and Bucky steps into the large room to put you on your bed without disturbing you.

When he pulls the comforter over you, he is just about to walk away to meet Steve, but you've woken up from the transfer, and you're not engulfed in his warmth anymore.

"Stay?" you ask him in a rough, sleepy voice, and he agrees. Right now, all he cares about is you, and Steve isn't capable of looking either of you in the eye after knowing what you did in that office.

For Bucky, though, this is truly a win-win situation. More time with you and the rest of the day to do whatever he pleases? It's like his dream come true.

[kairismess]

Hii!! Can I request Hinata with childhood best friends to lovers with a fem! s/o? I'm in love with soft pining stuff and Hinata so why not put two and two together ✨✨

Btw love your writing!!!

hearts' day 003.

from his best friend to his girlfriend, his one and only.

"oh, her? she's my best friend! well... at least i think she's just my best friend..."

shoyo had never thought twice about what you were to him, whenever someone on his team, in his class, or any of his close friends and family members asked him about you, he never hesitated to say you were his best friend.

you were his best friend in the sense that he couldn't remember what life was like without you, it was like you were always just with him, and to imagine his life before you... it didn't feel right, like every happy, good thing that happened to him, ever sad, gut-wrenching memory he has, you were always there to support him, to comfort him, to laugh with and cry with him.

he had always admired you, for every little and big thing you did for and with him, for every memory you two shared together, it was like you were the most comforting constant in his life–the warmest ray of sunshine in is life without even realizing it.

whenever the orange haired boy spoke about you, he always had the biggest, brightest smile on his face; always had the happiest voice when he told stories about you two, and never stopped complimenting you, never stopped describing you in the sweetest way possible.

and only when others kept pointing out how his feelings for you were probably a little more than just friendly feelings... he soon felt the butterflies flying around in his stomach, the fuzzy heat in his cheeks, and the unbearable urge to want to hold you in his arms, be your strength, your refuge, for as long as you'll let him be.

he couldn't find the courage to tell you right away, because you two had been friends for so long that it just felt a little weird to him to suddenly go from being your best friend to suddenly your best friend who had feelings for you. he overthought so much when he was around you during that time, there were so many things he wanted to do for and with you, but he could never quite take that first, pivotal step to letting his feelings for you be known.

but of course, no secret of his could ever be kept from you for too long; and so... he confessed to you one starry evening when you were at his place, with his parents and natsu fast asleep, the two of you outside in the backyard, just lying down on a picnic blanket under the stars. he let out his heart to you, expressed how he just couldn't not love you, because... you were everything.

you were beautiful, you were smart, you were kind, you were loving, you were... you. and that was more than enough reason for shoyo to love you more than anyone he's ever loved before.

and from that evening forth... he finally felt free. he finally felt like you two could soar together, that's how he felt when you made the first move and became the girl he shared his first kiss with. and now, he can't imagine the rest of his life without you.

[cityofmeliora]

What do you think about Copia’s childhood? I saw your post about Terzo’s, so I started wondering. Where do you think he was raised, who do you think he was raised by, how did it contribute to who he is today?

YESSSSSS YES YES YES YES THIS IS THE ASK I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR RAAAAHHHH–

ok so first, i just wanna be clear that this post isn't gonna include anything about Cardi's twin because i'm still waiting to see what happens next in the lore before i try to write anything involving him.

with that out of the way,

like all my Ghost headcanons, my headcanons about Cardi are built on the foundation that the band Ghost lore is about 1) an evil satanic cult, and 2) a dysfunctional showbiz family from Los Angeles.

basically, i think Cardi had a very lonely childhood. and he has psychological issues caused by a lifetime of Sister Imperator's insane parenting. his anxiety in Rite Here Rite Now, about how being Papa is all he wants to do and all he thinks he could do, SCREAMS of "unethical Hollywood parent who molded her child to be a star" to me.

i do think Sister 'raised' him, or was at least present in his life since he was a child ("You'll always be my little Cardi.") and she just... didn't him she was his mom / Nihil was his dad. (i guess it's quite similar to children of catholic clergy IRL, who are sometimes raised by family but never told about their true parentage, or know the truth and are told to hide it.)

Cardi is autistic, obviously, but i also think his awkwardness is him being socially underdeveloped because he comes from an isolated cult environment. he was a weird satanic homeschool kid who almost never interacted with anyone outside the Ministry, and he was basically left to watch movies and listen to music and play video games all day. i like the idea that Cardi had dance training when he was young, though. that was probably the only time he really got to interact with others. and because he grew up in the Los Angeles area, on the occasions he did get to go out, he was always surrounded by the entertainment industry and people trying to rise to stardom.

anyway, i think this was all somewhat intentional, or at least worked in Sister Imperator's favor, to mold him into a neurotic showbiz baby in service of her evil satanic death cult. (though i don't think he cares about the cult aspect of Ghost at all. he's been in it his whole life because he didn't have a choice and has never known anything else. he really just wants to be a rock star.) growing up without the love of friends + family, Cardi filled that void with games / music / film. so... of course he wanted to be an entertainer when he grew up– that was his only avenue for human connection.

and i think Cardi kinda knew Sister Imperator was giving him special treatment and pulling strings to put him in position to become Papa, though he never understood why.

a major point in my Terzo character analysis post is that he was very ambitious and he loved being an entertainer and a showman, but he was frustrated because he wasn't allowed to express his full potential. i wrote that his mindset was "i know i'm good enough. and i could prove it if they would just let me."

and ever since i wrote that, i can't stop thinking about how Cardi feels the exact same way.

he's super talented. he's worked very hard. he's proud of his accomplishments. he's proven he's capable! but Sister Imperator doesn't respect him. she infantilizes him. she keeps the training wheels on. she doesn't want him to be capable!

Sister Imperator does not allow Cardi to have independent thoughts or make real decisions for himself. she allows him the illusion of autonomy when she needs to, but every time he shows a little bit of awareness of how fucked up his life actually is, she shuts him down to keep him under control. she purposefully hides information from him so he won't know anything she doesn't want him to know. she intrudes on his privacy because his bedroom doesn't have a door.

i think their relationship has been like this his whole life.

you can see examples of this manipulation / obfuscation throughout the Chapters, and you can see a lot of it in Rite Here Rite Now.

first off, the opening narration gives the context / background information that sometime in late 2021, when Cardi was 51 years old, he found out his two bosses are actually his parents, and his mother kept this a secret from both him and his father his whole life. which is. wild. to say the least.

(i think when he found out, he was disappointed by the realization that he got to where he is because he was secretly a nepo baby and not because he was doing a good job on his own.)

moving on. in Rite Here Rite Now, Cardi's main source of stress was that he fully believed his parents were going to murder him and then put his body on display to sell VIP tickets for his successor's concerts. this was genuine fear, and he had a legitimate reason to believe they would do that to him because they actually did that to his three older brothers! and in the later Chapters, Sister Imperator and Mr. Psaltarian were totally fucking with his head and making him think he was going to die!

he asks Sister why he can't continue being Papa for longer –because he doesn't want his parents to kill him when they're done with him– and she just brushes him off and tells him to keep playing his show. then in the Miasma scene, Cardi has a critical moment of awareness and asks what the hell is actually going on in his life and who's in control.

PAPA EMERITUS IV: One thing I do not understand… All these things… here, all of this stuff, and all of these things we're doing, where we go, and when, and to where… Who decides these things? I mean, who's calling the shots?

this is totally fair! he has a right to know this information!

in response, his parents completely avoid answering the question. they shut him down and basically tell him he sounds ungrateful for the life he has.

SISTER IMPERATOR: You waste so much time and energy worrying about what's been and what's next, who's next and whatnot. As with all things in life, it circulates. Everything that has a beginning has an ending. There just has to be an orderly transition.

she never tells him the truth. she just tells him to stop worrying. stop thinking.

they never tell him they're not going to kill him. They Never Tell Him They're Not Going To Kill Him. THEY NEVER TELL HIM THEY'RE NOT GOING TO KILL HIM.

Cardi spends the last third of the movie making peace with the idea that he is going to die soon and his parents will be the ones to kill him. after Respite On The Spitalfields, he seems resigned to his fate. he tells the Nameless Ghouls they're not doing an encore. he says "Fuck it." but Sister Imperator, still explaining nothing, tells him to do the encore and he unenthusiastically gets back on stage.

SISTER IMPERATOR: Even though you don't understand right now, sooner or later, you will know what I'm talking about. Things –events– are unavoidable. Now you go back out there and give them one hell of an encore. And that's all you have to worry about. PAPA EMERITUS IV: Okay. SISTER IMPERATOR: Off you go.

by the beginning of Square Hammer, he decides he is actually happy with the life he has and he's okay with whatever's coming. and he still expects he's going to die... only for them to totally fake him out.

Sister Imperator dies instead. in the letter she leaves him, she tells him, "My son, I'm sorry I could not find it in my heart to tell you about my condition. I was afraid you might lose your sometimes frail concentration." more obfuscation. more infantilization.

at the end of the letter, she promotes him to head of the Clergy. he takes on his new job assignment as Frater Imperator and he seems to think he'll have more power now that Sister Imperator is "not in charge anymore." i'm not so sure about that.

and this isn't even getting into all the other weird shit going on between them in that movie! why was Cardi literally unable to see her wheelchair and medicine until the Spoksonat scene? why couldn't he remember his twin brother who he spent time with as a child? either Cardi is even more mentally unwell than we know, or Sister is messing with his head in even more ways than we know. maybe both. probably both.

i do believe Sister Imperator loves Cardi. that does not negate the fact that she is also manipulative and dishonest and has no respect for him, and that made her a terrible parent. she caused him a lifetime of unnecessary confusion and suffering in furtherance of her goals. yes, he is often childish and irresponsible. but i think the way she treated him didn't allow him to mature on his own.

the worst part about all this? i think he's convinced himself that he loves her, too. (he doesn't actually know how to feel about her. it would be too painful to think about.)

in summary, to me, Cardi's life is like The Truman Show, except it's the bad ending where the producer (Sister Imperator) successfully convinces him to stay in the bubble.

this was supposed to be a headcanons post and it totally turned into an analysis post, but i cannot help it. i just love Cardi so fucking much!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I JUST WANT CARDI TO BE SAFE AND HAPPY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

btw i think his actual legal given name is Cardinal Copia Imperator. yeah. i believe Sister Imperator actually named him that.

[wannabehockeygf]

Melting - Clayton Keller

"So you'll smile at everything I say, You got some soft lips and some pearly whites, I wanna touch them in the dead of night, Your smile ignites just like a candlelight, Then somehow, I know everything's alright."

*** request: i smushed the two requests I got today together, so it's #2 "Five more minutes?" plus #11 "You fell asleep on me, I didn't want to wake you up." another prompt requested was smutty, which I am happy to do, but you should probably re-request. summary: a mediocre first date turns into something more intimate word count: 4.1k pairing: clayton keller x fem!reader warnings: none just teeth rotting fluff! notes: - I love my man clayton more than anyone else. i will always be happy to do any requests for him. - saw one of my grades grade drop from 92 to 76 today so I needed a full reset and I guess that reset was writing fluff! - based in Arizona because I'm still in denial

italics represent flashback

gif creds: keller-clayton i gave up putting gifs in my fics a while ago but LOOK AT HIM I JUST WANNA KISS HIS FACE ALL OVER. *** The last thing you remember was standing on that tenth hole of the mini-golf course, wondering if it was socially acceptable to call an Uber in the middle of a first date. Mini-golfing had felt more like a middle-school field trip than an actual adult date. And if your performance had been any indication, you weren’t exactly “fun at parties” material. By hole six, you were already praying for the windmill to sweep you off your feet and put you out of your misery.

You weren’t trying to be dramatic, but let’s be honest—you sucked. Badly. You didn’t just miss the hole; you missed the general direction. The ball took off like it had a personal vendetta against you, disappearing into the bushes half the time. By the tenth hole, you were seriously considering feigning a headache, or better yet, an existential crisis, to bail early. Maybe there was a black hole you could throw yourself into.

That’s when Clayton saved you.

Well, saved might’ve been a strong word. He asked, “Do you wanna ditch this whole thing and go back to my place?”

Cue all your alarms going off at once. Yeah, you knew exactly what that meant. First date, cozy house, late-night drinks—he wasn’t subtle. You were supposed to say no, laugh it off, maybe suggest a different venue.

Instead, you heard yourself agree.

You thought you’d stay for a bit, make a polite exit before things got weird. But then, you ended up at his house—a stupidly nice one, complete with a pool, basketball court, and palm trees that looked straight out of a vacation ad. Like, was this guy a finance bro? Or did he have one of those mysterious jobs where he’s always "working on something big?" Either way, it felt excessive.

Then came the wine. Hesitation turned into a sip, which turned into three glasses, and somewhere between one of his stories about traveling to Europe and your sarcastic commentary, you ended up on his lap, his hands–

“Am I the asshole for-”

Immediately, the noise cuts out, and you hear a soft curse coming from… under you? “Shit!” Clayton hisses, taking a deep breath which you feel completely. 

You stir, blinking against the sunlight spilling in through unfamiliar curtains. For a second, you can’t quite place where you are. Your brain is doing that sluggish, half-awake thing where it refuses to connect dots. All you know is that you’re warm, too warm, and there’s something solid beneath you.

Wait, why is your pillow breathing?

Your eyes snap open fully, and sure enough, there’s Clayton—underneath you. You’re sprawled across his chest like some kind of human blanket, legs tangled with his, your face smushed into the crook of his neck. Casual. Totally normal. Just your typical Saturday morning human pretzel situation.

Oh god.

Panic prickles up your spine, and you stay perfectly still, trying to figure out how you got here. You remember the mini-golf—barely—and the way you’d been one sad swing away from asking if he had a time machine to rewind you out of the entire evening. Then there was his house, the wine, his stupidly perfect jawline. And… oh right, that situation.

Your mind goes from zero to a hundred in seconds, racing to catch up with reality. You’re on top of him. Like, full-body contact, face-in-his-neck, can-feel-his-breath-on-your-skin kind of on top of him. Oh god, what the hell happened last night? Did you…? No. No, you remember now. Mostly. You didn’t sleep with him. Right?

You chance a glance at his phone screen out of the corner of your eye, and yup—he’s casually scrolling through TikTok like this is the most normal thing in the world. Like you're not literally draped across him like some kind of half-conscious sloth. The soft, muffled sound of a Reddit story video plays from his phone, but it's drowned out by the thunderous beat of your pulse in your ears. You can feel the rise and fall of his chest beneath you, steady, calm, like you didn’t just wake up using him as a human mattress.

How long have you been like this? How long has he been awake? He’s obviously been up long enough to decide that reaching for his phone was preferable to trying to extricate himself from your limpet-like hold. You mentally groan. So, what now? Do you play it off? Pretend to still be asleep until he leaves? Just roll off him dramatically and flee the house?

You squeeze your eyes shut, willing yourself to vanish into thin air, but no such luck. You're still here, still on top of him, still melting into the soft heat of his skin.

How the hell did this happen?

And then, like a bad movie montage, it all comes flooding back. He’d pulled you onto his lap, his hands steady on your hips as if they’d always been there. The warmth of his touch had sent shivers down your spine, and you weren’t sure if it was the wine or something else entirely making your head spin. You could still feel the smooth drag of his palm as it slipped under your shirt, fingers teasing along the curve of your back. Your heart had been racing so fast you were pretty sure he could hear it.

“You’re—uh—comfortable?” you’d asked, your voice coming out breathier than you’d intended.

Clayton had chuckled, that low, rumbling sound that made your stomach flip in ways you weren’t proud of. “Very.” And then, without another word, his lips were on yours, soft but insistent, like he was waiting for you to tell him no.

But you hadn’t. At least, not at first.

Instead, you'd leaned into him, your hands slipping into his hair, tangling in the soft strands as the kiss deepened. He tasted like wine and something sweeter, something that made your brain go a little fuzzy around the edges. You could feel the heat building between you, the way his fingers dug into your hips just a little harder, pulling you against him until you were practically straddling him.

For a moment, it had felt like this was exactly where you were supposed to be—right here, in his lap, his mouth on yours, and your body pressing into his like it was the only thing keeping you anchored to the earth. But then—then something in your brain had clicked back on, the fog lifting just enough for you to realize what was happening.

Your heart had stuttered. You’re definitely not in the right headspace for this

You’d pulled back, breathing hard, your forehead resting against his. “I—um—maybe we should…” You hadn’t known how to finish the sentence, and your words had tumbled out in a mess of half-started thoughts and awkward pauses. Clayton had stilled, his hands dropping from your waist instantly, his eyes searching yours with something like understanding.

“Yeah, of course,” he’d said, his voice soft, and you could tell he wasn’t mad, wasn’t pushing. He just…stopped.

And that’s where the details get a little blurry. You must have fallen asleep after that, the wine and the tension finally catching up to you.

And now, here you are, waking up on top of him like some kind of oversized cat, his phone buzzing softly beneath your ear as he doom scrolls some more.

You shift, just slightly, testing the waters. His hand, the one not holding his phone, brushes absently against your back in response. A lazy, absent-minded gesture, like he’s forgotten you’re there but also somehow hasn’t.

Is this... normal for him? Just scrolling through TikTok with a girl sprawled across him like he’s some sort of makeshift mattress? Maybe this is his thing. Maybe you’ve entered some weird new level of dating etiquette where waking up on top of your date is a normal, acceptable thing that people do.

You finally muster up the courage to move, rolling onto your side—slowly, carefully, like you’re disarming a bomb. Clayton’s arm, previously draped across your back, falls away, and you find yourself sitting next to him instead of on top of him. Progress.

He glances over, his eyes meeting yours for the first time since you’ve woken up. There’s no awkwardness, no tension, just a soft smile that somehow makes you want to crawl back into the crook of his neck and stay there forever.

“Good morning,” he says, his voice still rough from sleep, and you can feel it in your bones.

Oh god, you think. You are so screwed.

“Hey,” you mumble back, trying to sound casual but knowing full well your voice betrays you. Your throat is dry, and you really, really wish you could just dissolve into the couch.

Clayton lifts his phone. “You fell asleep pretty quick after the wine,” he says, like he’s giving you a status report. “Didn’t want to move.”

Oh no, that's fine, I love waking up like a koala in a tree, clung to a guy I barely know. It’s totally my thing, you think, but what comes out is a garbled, “Thanks. Uh, yeah. Long day.”

You can feel the heat creeping up your neck and spreading to your cheeks. The mini-golf disaster, the wine, the whole making-out-on-his-lap thing—it all feels like some weird fever dream. But here you are, awake, on his couch, and somehow still alive.

“Well,” he says, stretching slightly and glancing at the time on his phone, “if you want coffee or breakfast or anything… no rush.” There’s something about the way he says it, all nonchalant, that makes you think he’s done this before. You wish you could bottle up that confidence and chug it like an espresso shot. But then he continues, “Or… you could come back here?”

You stare at him for a beat, trying to process what just came out of his mouth. Come back here? Like, back to the human pretzel situation you’d just barely escaped from? There’s no way he’s serious. But when you look at him, his face is soft, his eyes sleepy in a way that makes your heart do an embarrassing little flip.

You blink, your brain scrambling for a response. You could say no. You could grab your things and make a polite-but-hasty exit, chalking this whole thing up to “well, that happened.” But then he shifts slightly, his hand still resting casually on the couch, so close to yours that the warmth of his skin is almost tangible. His voice is soft when he speaks again, barely above a murmur.

“Five more minutes?”

Oh. Oh, that’s unfair. He’s not playing fair. You can practically feel your resolve slipping through your fingers like sand. Five minutes? What kind of heartless person says no to that?

You glance down at his hand, at the way his fingers twitch just slightly like he's waiting for you to move. It’s such a simple invitation, but for some reason, it feels like the world’s biggest decision. Your internal monologue is in full gear, screaming at you to think this through, but your body betrays you almost immediately. Before you even realize what you’re doing, you’re leaning back into him, your head finding its way to the curve of his shoulder like it’s the most natural thing in the world.

You can feel his breath catch just a little as you settle against him, and for a second, the room feels heavier, like the air itself is thicker. His arm instinctively comes around you, gentle but steady, pulling you just a fraction closer. His warmth seeps into your skin, and you’re not sure if it’s the leftover wine fuzzing your thoughts or the fact that you’ve somehow wound up here, in this moment, but for once, your brain doesn’t race to catch up. It just… stops.

His heartbeat is slow, steady, beneath your ear, and you feel like you’re floating in this weird bubble of peace, suspended between the moment you just left and the one you’re trying to make sense of now. His hand rests lightly on your back, his thumb absentmindedly tracing a soft pattern that sends tiny sparks up your spine. The room is quiet, save for the occasional hum of the air conditioner and the soft rustle of the sheets as he shifts to get more comfortable.

You can feel the weight of his chin resting against the top of your head, and it’s such a small thing, such a casual, barely-there gesture, but it feels like everything. You close your eyes, letting yourself sink into the warmth of him, the softness of the moment. This isn’t what you expected—hell, none of this is what you expected—but here you are, breathing him in, his chest rising and falling in time with yours.

“You okay?” he asks quietly, his voice rough with the remnants of sleep. You can feel the vibrations of it in your bones, deep and gentle, as if he’s scared of breaking the stillness.

You nod, but it’s not enough, not when your face is pressed into his shirt. “Yeah,” you manage to mumble, your voice muffled by the fabric. “I’m okay.”

More than okay, actually.

He hums softly in response, the sound a low rumble that makes you feel like you could stay like this forever. And maybe that’s what scares you. How easy this is. How comfortable it feels to be wrapped up in him like this, even after the absolute chaos of the night before. You can’t remember the last time you felt this… safe.

There’s a part of you that wants to analyze every little detail—wants to pick apart why you’re so comfortable in his arms, why you’re not sprinting for the door, why your heart is doing this stupid fluttery thing every time he shifts even the slightest bit. But instead, you let yourself just be.

For once, your brain doesn’t go into overdrive. For once, it doesn’t matter what happens next, or what the mini-golf fiasco meant, or whether you’ll see him again after this. All that matters is the quiet, the warmth of his chest under your cheek, and the way his fingers trail lazy circles on your back.

You’ve only known him for, what, a handful of hours? Yet somehow, this moment feels like the calmest you’ve been in a long time.

His phone buzzes again, and you feel him shift slightly beneath you, but he doesn’t check it. Instead, he tightens his hold on you just a bit, his arm pulling you closer until you’re tucked into him so securely that it’s almost hard to tell where you end and he begins. But suddenly, it starts to feel slightly suffocating, and you can’t help but try to ease the tension, even if it’s in a weird way. “I’m guessing you don’t go on dates often?” you try to joke, but it sounds largely breathy.

Clayton stiffens for a moment, like he’s been caught off guard by your question. You can feel it in the way his chest stops its steady rhythm under your cheek. The hand that had been tracing lazy circles on your back pauses mid-motion. For a split second, the comfortable cocoon of warmth and quiet you’d both been wrapped in feels like it’s stretched a little too thin, like the moment might crack under the weight of the question.

Then, he lets out this weird, choked laugh. It’s not exactly a hearty chuckle, more like the sound someone makes when they’ve been caught with their hand in the cookie jar and aren’t sure how to explain themselves. You shift, lifting your head slightly to look at him, and when you do, you’re met with a sight that almost makes you snort. Clayton—mister “I-have-a-stupidly-nice-house-and-know-exactly-what-to-do-with-my-hands-like-it’s-no-big-deal”—is blushing.

Blushing.

His cheeks are a shade of pink that would’ve been adorable under any other circumstance. But seeing him like this? The guy who confidently pulled you onto his lap last night and didn’t even blink? Yeah, it’s throwing you off, and the tiny, embarrassed laugh that bubbles out of you isn’t helping.

“I—uh—what?” He stammers, shifting awkwardly beneath you. His arm, the one that had been holding you so comfortably, suddenly feels unsure of itself, hovering like he’s debating whether to pull you closer or shove a pillow between you to create some much-needed distance.

You blink up at him, trying to hide your amusement. “The date. I mean… you don’t seem like the ‘mini-golf-and-wine’ type.”

His blush deepens, and he clears his throat, his gaze darting away from yours like he’s desperately searching for an escape route. “Yeah, well, uh… I don’t really do this often.”

You peek up at him, raising an eyebrow. "Not often, or not at all?"

He chuckles nervously, and it's not that smooth, rumbly laugh from last night. It's more like an awkward, I’m-really-not-used-to-this kind of sound. “Not at all?” he says, but it comes out like a question. His face flushes just a little, and you can’t help but smile at the fact that, despite owning a house straight out of a Malibu dream, he's clearly not as suave as he seemed.

“Wait, seriously?” You shift slightly, trying to get a better look at him, but this only makes him more flustered. His hand, which had been resting casually on your back, retreats to his side like it’s suddenly self-conscious. “But you have this”—you gesture vaguely at his ridiculous house, the pool you vaguely remember seeing through his sliding glass doors—"and you don’t date?"

Clayton looks like he wants to sink into the couch and disappear. He rubs his face with his free hand, groaning softly. “Yeah, I know it doesn’t make sense.” He hesitates, glancing at you before continuing, “I’m just… busy, I guess. Work and stuff.”

“Oh, work and stuff, how mysterious,” you tease, unable to resist poking fun at the vague excuse. “You make it sound like you’re Batman or something. Got a secret crime-fighting career on the side?”

His laugh this time is real, shaking off some of the tension. “If only. I mean, I could rock a cape…”

You grin, glad to see him relax, even just a little. “So, what’s the deal then? You have this nice house, you’ve clearly got some kind of job that lets you travel to Europe, and yet… no time to date?” You raise an eyebrow. “Are you some kind of super-busy finance bro who’s married to the grind?”

Clayton cringes, but there’s a sheepish smile pulling at his lips. “No, no finance bro stuff. Just… um… sports?”

You stare at him, blinking slowly as the realization hits. "Wait… sports?" Your voice comes out more confused than you intended, and it lingers in the air between the two of you. Clayton shifts, his expression growing a little more sheepish, like he’s just admitted to something far more embarrassing. You raise an eyebrow, silently urging him to continue.

"Yeah," he finally mutters, rubbing the back of his neck like he’s trying to work out the tension. “I mean, it’s not a big deal, but, uh… hockey. NHL, actually.”

You blink again, processing the words as they hang there. Hockey. NHL. Him.

“Wait, like… you’re a professional hockey player?" you ask, almost breathless. Your heart stumbles for a moment, and you try not to make a big deal out of it, but the surprise is clear in your voice. He nods, awkwardly.

"Yeah, but it’s not like I go around telling people that." He glances at you, gauging your reaction. His cheeks turn back to a faint pink, and suddenly, his earlier confidence from last night seems to vanish.

You squint at him, tilting your head. "Wait, so... you just let me ramble about mini-golf without dropping that bomb? Was this like a test or something?"

His eyes widen, and he waves his hands defensively, nearly knocking over the throw pillow. “No, no! It wasn’t a test!” His voice is frantic, trying to backpedal from your accusation. “I swear! I didn’t think it was relevant… I just—” He stops, rubbing his temples like he’s regretting this entire conversation. “It’s been a while, okay? I’m just… I’m just glad to have someone warm here for once that isn’t my dog.”

That soft confession hits you harder than you expected. The vulnerability in his words sinks into the quiet between you, and you find yourself melting into the moment. You smile softly, shifting in his arms to look up at him fully. There’s a warmth blooming in your chest, and it has nothing to do with the cozy blanket wrapped around you.

A professional hockey player? You’d barely noticed his muscles last night, all lean and casual under his t-shirt, too distracted by the chaos of mini-golf and his awkwardly charming attempts at flirting–better than your other Hinge dates. Now, though, the pieces are falling into place—his house, the sleek car, the fact that he was clearly trying so hard to make a good impression despite his obvious nerves. He wasn’t trying to hide his life from you… he was just so genuinely out of practice that he didn’t know how to navigate it.

You pull back slightly, just enough to look at him, your forehead still resting lightly against his shoulder as you tilt your head up. His face is flushed, and he’s staring down at you like he’s expecting you to bolt at any second.

You let out a breath, your fingers absently tracing the hem of his shirt where it’s bunched around your waist. “You really should’ve led with that, you know,” you tease, your voice light as you try to keep things from getting too serious. “Might’ve saved us both a lot of confusion.”

Clayton groans, burying his face in his hands for a second before dropping them back to his sides in defeat. “Yeah, well… I didn’t want to, like, make it weird,” he mutters, his blush creeping back up his neck. “I just—god, I’m really bad at this, huh?”

You can’t help but laugh softly, shaking your head. “Nah, you’re not that bad,” you reply, your voice gentle. “Just… out of practice.”

The silence that follows is easy, the weight of his chin resting on top of your head once more as you both settle into the moment. His arm eventually returns to its place around you, his fingers grazing your back in slow, lazy circles, and you let yourself sink into the warmth of him again. It’s so soft, so quiet. It’s almost too perfect, really, like you’ve stumbled into some kind of dream you didn’t even know you wanted.

He clears his throat after a beat, his voice hesitant. “So… if I’m this bad at dating,” he says slowly, “Does that mean I’m not getting a second one?”

You blink, surprised, and tilt your head up to look at him again. His eyes are soft, full of that quiet vulnerability from before, and you feel your heart stutter in your chest. You weren’t expecting that, weren’t expecting him to be so earnest about wanting to see you again.

You open your mouth to respond, but your brain falters for a second. A second date? After everything last night? After finding out he’s an NHL player, of all things? But then his gaze catches yours, and there’s something in his eyes that makes it hard to say anything but yes.

“Well,” you say slowly, your lips curving into a teasing smile, “I guess that depends.”

“On what?” He tilts his head, genuinely curious.

“On whether or not our next date involves fewer golf clubs and more dogs.”

His face lights up, a real, boyish grin spreading across his features, and he lets out a soft laugh, the tension in his shoulders melting away. “Yeah, I can definitely do that,” he murmurs, his hand sliding up your back to rest just between your shoulder blades. He pulls you closer, pressing a soft kiss to the top of your head. “You’ll have to meet him first, though. He’s got final approval.”

You chuckle softly, the sound muffled against his chest. “Well, let’s hope I make a good impression, then.”

There’s another pause, and you feel his breath catch just a little as he presses his chin against the crown of your head again. “You’ve already made one,” he says quietly, almost like he doesn’t want you to hear it.

Your heart skips, your chest tightening in a way that feels both exhilarating and terrifying. There’s a softness here, a tenderness that you didn’t expect, and it’s seeping into the space between you like warm sunlight through a window. You’re not sure what this is yet, not sure where it’s going or what it means, but for the first time in a long time, it doesn’t feel like you have to know. You’re just… here, in the moment, wrapped up in him and the warmth of his arms, and that’s enough.

Maybe it’s more than enough.

[sihtricfedaraaahvicius]

Shooting a Movie part 4

Note: another thanks to @foxyanon for encouraging me while writing! & thanks to @legitalicat for coming up with a little nickname for a certain character ;)

reblogs & comments are very much appreciated, and make sure to read the previous chapters: part 1 - part 2 - part 3.

Warnings: 18+!! smut and a bit of angst.

pairing: Modern!Sihtric x you (f) / Modern!Masema x you (f)

summary: you continued to work with Sihtric, as well as with Masema.

wordcount: 5,4k

Masterlist

Your trip with Sihtric from Durham to London had been pleasant so far. He was a good driver and his energy was always positive and warm while he also eased your mind about your upcoming photoshoot. He would be there with you, and he promised that if anyone would even do as much as look at you the wrong way, he would tell them off. You were still nervous for your shoot, but knowing someone you feel safe with would be by your side made it easier.

You shared a hotel room together during your five day stay and also slept in the same bed, but Sihtric was respectful and never tried to have any sexual activities with you during the first two nights, despite aching to be intimate with you. He didn't know you would have never turned him down if he were to initiate something, but you also held off from making a move yourself because you wanted to keep things professional. And beside that, Sihtric was a real gentleman anyway, taking you out for lunch and dinner every day and always making sure you had everything you needed during your stay.

The first evening together was a little strange. You were both quite unsure about how to behave, as you were together for the first time without having any job to do or script to discuss. You eventually decided to watch some random tv in bed and, almost naturally, you ended up cuddling under the sheets. The butterflies you felt were overwhelming when you rested comfortably against Sihtric's bare chest while he had one arm wrapped around you, and you fell asleep like that not much later.

The second day you went over your contract together for the photoshoot, as Sihtric wanted to know what exactly you had agreed to, and after that you just did some sightseeing in the capital city. You ended up roaming the streets together, hand in hand, while you both slowly began to open up about some more personal things in your lives. And later that night, after dinner, you ended up all cuddled up in bed again to watch some easy tv, while Sihtric uploaded some content to his OnlyFans which he had already made before the trip. 

Sihtric chuckled when he saw the notification pop up on his phone that you had liked the video he had just shared, which was a rather sensual video of him jerking off in his shower, and you grinned when Sihtric looked at you with a mild side-eye.

'What?' you snorted, 'you know I see that stuff when you post it.'

'Yeah, well,' Sihtric laughed a little shyly, 'it's weird to see you're watching me touch myself while I'm literally next to you.'

'You should've thought about that before,' you smiled and shrugged.

Sihtric shook his head lightly and rolled his eyes while he smiled, 'Yes, okay, just… just stop watching now.'

'Fine,' you fake huffed and locked your phone, then rolled over to your other side of the bed and switched off the lights.

'Hey,' Sihtric complained.

'What?' you shrugged, 'I have to get up early tomorrow.'

'Fine,' Sihtric sighed, not even close to being annoyed but still pretending that he was, and he also put his phone down. 

And then, once again like the night before, he almost naturally cuddled up to you from behind while you both dozed off.

Today, the third day of your trip, was the day of the photoshoot. You arrived to set early to get your hair and make-up done, while Sihtric was present in your dressing room and just minding his own business, mainly scrolling on his phone and keeping up with what was going on in the industry. You occasionally glanced at him, without his knowledge, by looking in the mirror and seeing him sit behind you, looking so ridiculously sexy while he was just wearing some simple black sweatpants and a loose fitted black shirt, while the unshaved side of his head showed his messy curls. You felt truly blessed to have him around and cherished every second in his presence. And once you were all dressed and ready, Sihtric followed you quietly when you were called on set.

'Good luck,' he smiled and gave you a wink, to which you felt yourself blush and thanked him before you carefully walked in your enormous white latex heels to the mark on the floor.

Everything started off well, and Sihtric was glad to see you were treated decently. He was also glad to be there to witness your stunning look, as you were dressed in a tight fitting and dangerously short skirt with a matching white, stretchy crop top. And it all went fine, until the photographer, who Sihtric then realised was the Aethelred, told you to lower your top seemingly out of nowhere. Sihtric carefully monitored the situation from a distance and he watched your response before deciding if he had to interfere or not.

'My top? But…I,' you stammered, a little bewildered, 'I wasn't told…that…'

'Listen,' Aethelred sighed and threw his hands up, 'show those tits or go home, okay?'

You stared at the photographer, desperately fighting your tears and the tremble that was about to take over your lower lip. You were too ashamed to look for Sihtric in the crowded room, and your shaky hands then slowly reached for the neck of your white stretchy top, and you curled your fingers around the fabric as you swallowed hard. You came all this way and you needed the money, while Aethelred was also one of the most famous explicit photographers in the business, so you felt like you were in no position to disagree. But just before you could unwillingly expose your breasts, Sihtric jumped up from his chair and stormed over from across the room.

'Hey!' Sihtric shouted, which startled everyone on set, 'was that in the contract?'

Aethelred stared at you and then at Sihtric, not sure what to say as the man with fury in his mismatched eyes came closer, so he just laughed awkwardly while he felt his face turn red.

'Well, showing more skin will make her more popular,' Aethelred nervously argued while Sihtric got up in his face.

'But was that in the contract?' Sihtric asked again, more threatening this time as he already knew the answer to his own question.

'I… well…' Aethelred stammered.

Sihtric then looked at you and asked you the same question.

'No,' you said, barely louder than a whisper, 'this was not described as a topless shoot.'

Sihtric looked back at Aethelred, who was fuming as much as he was actually terrified.

'Well,' the photographer cleared his throat, 'if she wants to continue working in this industry, she better listens-'

'I think we both heard enough,' Sihtric cut him off and backed away, 'come,' he said as he came over to you, 'we're leaving.'

'But, Sihtric, I… I need the money,' you confessed quietly.

'You don't, let's go,' he said and held his hand out to you but he saw the clear doubt in your eyes, 'I got you, okay? You're not going to work with this guy anymore. Don't worry about the money.'

'But it's Aethelred,' you whispered, 'he… you know he's big in the industry, Sihtric, he can ruin my career if I leave now-'

'No,' Sihtric protested, 'he will not ruin your career. That is just what everyone makes you think so they can pressure you into undressing for them. But this is not how it works, sweetheart, trust me. This is not okay, and we're leaving,' he said sternly.

You needed a moment to let his words soak in, but then you took his hand. Sihtric attempted to walk you with him, past Aethelred, but the latter suddenly grabbed your arm and you gasped as he pulled you towards him and away from Sihtric.

'I will make sure you will never get hired again,' Aethelred hissed at you.

Sihtric turned and saw Aethelred's bruising grip on your arm, and he gave the photographer a harsh shove away from you to which every employee on set turned their heads and became quiet.

'If you touch her again,' Sihtric growled, 'I will fucking sue you!'

'Do you know who I am?' Aethelred scoffed, arrogantly.

'Do you know who I am?' Sihtric asked, to which Aethelred took a few steps back, 'and do you have any idea how hard I work to create a safe space for these girls in this industry? To keep them away from assholes like you? And I… I will fucking ruin you,' Sihtric nearly whispered as he got full up into Aethelred's face, 'and not ruin you in the pleasant kind of way, sweetheart. I can expose you for the creep that you are and then I will make sure you never get hired again. You got that, Aethelcunt?'

Aethelred didn't speak, he just stared at Sihtric with his jaw clenched. He knew his behaviour with girls had been awful, but no one had ever dared to confront him about it so he never cared, until now.

'I asked if you got that?' Sihtric pushed his question.

'Y-yes,' he said hoarsely.

'Good,' Sihtric said, 'now apologise to the lady.'

Everyone held their breath as they stared at Aethelred, the famous photographer who was finally being put in his place for his misogynistic behaviour over the years, and they all secretly enjoyed how embarrassed he was.

'I… I'm sorry,' Aethelred mumbled.

'What was that?' Sihtric spoke up, thickening the awkward tension.

'I said I'm sorry!'

'Good,' Sihtric smiled, satisfied at humiliating the poor excuse of a man, 'if I ever see your face again…'

Sihtric didn't have to finish his sentence for everyone to understand what would happen if they crossed paths again, and he circled his arm around your waist to help you walk back to your dressing room in those ridiculously high heels. You changed back into your own short black skirt with a comfy hoodie on top without saying a word, and after that Sihtric drove you back to the hotel, the drive being just as quiet as the dressing room had been.

There was a tension between the two of you since that moment on set, not an uncomfortable one or a threatening one, but there was something lingering and unspoken. A heavy pressure you both felt, which was building up as the drive back to the hotel continued, and with each passing second that gnawing feeling intensified. Sihtric felt his heart pounding in his chest when his eyes trailed off the road and to your bare legs, while you heard the sound of your own blood pumping in your ears as you looked at his hand clenched on the gear stick. You silently imaged his hand around your throat, while Sihtric imagined your legs thrown over his shoulders, and the quiet tension became thicker once you got out of the car and stepped into the hotel elevator. 

Sihtric stared at doors as they closed, his jaw clenched and his eyes dark, and the light shock the elevator gave when it went up seemed to be the moment you both lost control. You grabbed Sihtric's shirt while he immediately reached for your face, pulling each other closer and crashing your lips together in a passionate and heated kiss. Sihtric pushed you up against the steel wall and hooked his arms under your legs, lifting you with ease and you instinctively enveloped your legs around his waist while your lips never left his. You felt his tongue in your mouth as he kissed you with such force, it was almost painful but you were desperate to kiss him until your lips were bruised. Your tongues slid around each other's and your hand moved up in his curls, the other settled on his neck to keep the kiss as deep as possible while Sihtric moaned into your mouth and squeezed your buttocks with such force it bruised your skin.

The elevator came to a halt at the eleventh floor, and Sihtric lowered you down before the doors could open. You felt the ground beneath your feet as soon as the elevator bell sounded and you grabbed Sihtric's arm to pull him with you immediately once the doors opened. You almost tripped over your own feet because of the haste you were in, but Sihtric caught you in time and pulled you flush against him while he pushed you to walk backwards to the room.

'Eager,' Sihtric chuckled and kissed you intensely again.

Your back hit the door of your hotel room and, while Sihtric kissed you, your hands searched the pockets of his sweatpants for the keycard, but you felt something much more exciting and began to rub his hard cock instead.

'Back pocket,' he murmured and pushed his hips into yours.

You reached for his back pocket and fished out the card, then turned to swipe the key, but before you could open the door Sihtric had already shoved your skirt up and pressed his clothed arousal against your ass, while you were trapped between his body and the door. You smiled and pushed your behind back against his crotch, which earned you a low chuckle from Sihtric and then you finally pushed open the door. You both almost fell into the room and Sihtric was fast to kick the door shut behind him, then picked you up and threw you on the bed.

'I wanna fuck you so hard,' he breathed while mounted on top of you, lips lightly touching while he grinded his hips against yours, 'lovingly though,' he chuckled.

'Then fuck me hard, Sihtric,' you whispered with a smile and teasingly traced his jaw with your fingertips, 'lovingly or not.'

The next morning you woke up in Sihtric's arms, and you both figured you needed a shower after you ended up having sex once again the night before.

'You go first,' Sihtric murmured, still half asleep.

'No, you can go,' you smiled while you tried to keep your eyes open.

'Well,' Sihtric said and paused to yawn, 'maybe we should shower together then.'

'Maybe we should,' you giggled, your hands roaming his naked body under the sheets.

'Oh, you want it to be that kind of a shower?' Sihtric smiled, then rolled over and picked you up in his arms with ease and carried you into the fancy bathroom.

'Should we… film something?' you asked almost shyly.

'Do you want to?'

'Yeah, I mean now that I won't get paid for that photoshoot, you know,' you shrugged lightly, 'I need to earn some money.'

Yesterday after dinner, and after another wild sex adventure, Sihtric had told you that you should consider making exclusive content for your OnlyFans, while also making stuff on your own terms and selling it to the studio you have a contract with. That is exactly what Sihtric did and it worked for him, being in control of his own footage and who he works with while also having a safe environment to work in. It was a new way of working for you and you needed to get the hang of it, and you figured why not make a short video with Sihtric as your first exclusive OnlyFans content, as the demand for you two together was clearly there.

Sihtric was up for it, without a doubt, and he was quick to grab his tripod and the camera he always travelled with and used to shoot his own footage whenever he felt like it. Within minutes he had it set up and rolling, starting the shoot with you from behind, completely naked and sensually leaning in to feel if the running water had a pleasurable temperature. And everything that followed after was just as hot and steamy as you hoped it would be, and only a few hours later you had the ten minute long video uploaded to you page, which quickly gained the interest of many and you saw the number of your paid subscribers increase with each passing minute.

And so you figured that maybe Sihtric was right. Maybe this would be a good way for you to work and make money while still enjoying it, as you had full control over who you decided to work with, if with anyone. Because, like Sihtric, you could also just make solo content. And with that newfound motivation and confidence, you went home the next afternoon, after having shared the bed with Sihtric a few more times though.

'Thanks for everything,' you said after he had dropped you off at your home, 'for looking after me and helping me and all that. It means a lot.'

'Anytime,' Sihtric smiled, 'you take it easy. Focus on making your own content and I promise you will be just fine. And only work with those you are comfortable with, okay?'

'Like you?' you chuckled.

'Sure, like me,' he laughed softly, 'I'm always just a text away, sweetheart,' he said and pulled you in for a hug, then kissed your cheek to say goodbye and you promised each other to stay in touch this time.

While you and Sihtric texted on a regular basis since your trip, you found out after a few weeks that your OnlyFans content wasn't just popular amongst the porn consumers, but suddenly a lot of fellow adult movie stars wanted to work with you privately as well. And one of them being very persistent was Masema. Masema was all about making money, and he knew that right now you were one of the people who he could make a lot of money with. You knew he wanted to work with you again ever since that movie you made with him, but it seemed that after he saw your short video with Sihtric, and the success it had, he had only gotten more eager. 

He suggested shooting at least two videos, one for his page and one for your own, and maybe some explicit photos as well. You liked his idea and you couldn't lie either, you wouldn't mind shooting some footage with him, so you decided to accept his request. You met him a few weeks later at his insanely fancy house again, while dressed in one of your signature short skirts with knee high boots and a faux leather crop top.

'It's good to see you again,' Masema flirted right away with his soft spoken voice as you both had a seat on that famous loungeset near his pool.

'Good to see you too,' you smiled and couldn't hide a faint blush on your cheeks.

He looked insanely good, as always, wearing tight black jeans and a black shirt. You didn't feel the same way about Masema as you felt about Sihtric, but you weren't completely unaffected by his good looks and his smooth voice either. And Masema clearly knew the effect he had on basically every lady he met with for work, and he used it to his advantage. He thought you were hot, but he wasn't in love with you, yet he'd go out of his way to try and make you believe you were the only one for him to make you want him more and more. And so he lightly brushed his fingers against your arms and shoulders while you had some small talk, setting you on fire with each touch and making you so desperately needy for him.

'So you're good with the idea?' Masema made sure to double check.

'Two videos, right?' you recalled, 'one blowjob, which will be exclusively for my page, and one of us just fucking for your page, right?'

'Yeah,' Masema nodded, 'that should do it.'

You agreed and Masema took your hand, 'So what are you up for first, pretty girl?'

'I think we should film that sex video first because we both know you're going to ruin my make-up when you shove your cock down my throat,' you said deadpan, to which you both burst into laughter seconds after.

'Yeah, I'll apologise in advance for making you cry,' Masema said softly and took your chin as he leaned in, 'but you do look so fucking sexy all ruined by me like that,' he trailed his fingers down to your neck, 'and it makes me so fucking hard.'

'Shouldn't you save that talk for the video?' you purred.

'We better start filming then,' Masema murmured with a cheeky smile.

He took your hand and led you back inside and up the stairs. He had a large spare room set up, from where he filmed most of his videos, and it had a comfortable looking bed and a large couch against the wall. The entire room was painted a fresh white and it was cleaner than a dentist's office, which showed you how professional Masema actually was underneath his rugged and stern look.

'I'm surprised to see no chains and leather stuff,' you chuckled as Masema switched the camera on which he had set up already.

'I got another room for that, gorgeous,' Masema smiled, 'but I know you're not into that, or at least not as experienced yet, so I have no business taking you there.'

'You have another room?'

'Yeah,' he scoffed with a laugh, 'why do you think I have so many bedrooms? I have one room that's just where I sleep, and all the other bedrooms are more or less different sets for shooting at home.'

'You don't really shoot at studios then?' you frowned.

'Absolutely not,' Masema shook his head, 'I did it with you that one time, but it's not something I usually do because I want to be in full control of what I do. And as soon as I got well known and respected enough to be in control of that, I designed every room here to be a different space. This industry is nasty, sweetheart,' he sighed, 'it's better to be in control of your own footage, trust me.'

'Y-yeah,' you cleared your throat and sat down on the large bed, 'Sihtric told me the same thing. He also prefers to make his own content.'

'Sihtric,' Masema mumbled, 'yeah, he got his business well arranged too it seems. But you know all about that, don't you?' he smirked.

'What's that supposed to mean?' you chuckled.

'We all saw that livestream you did with him,' he said as he neared you, 'and that shower video you uploaded a few weeks ago. I gotta ask… are you two dating?'

'What? No,' you blushed, 'we're not dating.'

'You make a lot of footage together.'

'Yeah, but… we're not dating. He's been helping me set up a safer place too, like you did here for yourself. He's looking out for me, you know?'

'That's kind of him,' Masema said half-heartedly.

'Yeah,' you smiled, 'he really is the sweetest guy I know. No offence.'

'Well, fuck,' Masema laughed, 'you're in love with him, aren't you?'

'Oh, shut up,' you laughed and slapped his muscular chest.

'Fine,' he leaned in, smoothly taking your chin again, 'you could belong to me, you know?' he lied.

Masema was not a guy to settle down, but he enjoyed knowing he could probably steal a girl away from someone. And Sihtric was competition in the business, so if he could hurt him somehow, he'd do it.

'I don't belong to anyone, Masema,' you said quietly while your heart skipped a beat at his touch.

'I don't care if you belong to someone or don't,' he whispered and traced your lips with his thumb, 'because regardless, I'll make you forget about everyone else when I fuck you.'

Masema smiled darkly and winked, then moved away to start filming while you moved off the bed and took your position on his white couch, leaning back relaxed and seductively to welcome him over. Masema joined you by sitting next to you, and you started off easy by making out sloppily until he had you so needy, you sat in his lap and grinded his thigh desperately, to which he smiled darkly once again. He truly had corrupted you that first time, making your shy and innocent side disappear as soon as he kissed you, seeing you change into the needy girl you were for him, and he loved it.

'Good girl,' Masema smiled as he looked up at you, sitting back with his arms spread across the backrest, just watching how you tried to get off on your own.

'Please,' you whined after a few minutes, 'Masema,' you breathed, 'fuck me, please.'

'Beg for it,' he said sternly and didn't move an inch.

You then moved off him and down on the floor in front of him, looking up with pleading eyes as Masema got up and towered over you. He took your chin firmly as he leaned in.

'I said beg.'

'Please,' you mumbled with a dazed smile, 'fuck me, please.'

'Good girl,' he whispered, 'take off my belt.'

He stood back as you obeyed, taking off his belt and unbuttoning his jeans while your mouth nearly watered, but you knew you couldn't suck him off now, you had to save that for later. There was no oral pleasure planned for this video, just sex.

Masema took off his shirt and you kissed your way up his toned torso, leaving red lipstick smudges all over his skin and he picked you up before you could kiss his lips again. He threw you on his bed and tore your panties off along with your skirt. He grabbed your ankle and pulled you towards the end of the bed where he stood, and he wrapped his hand around your throat pleasantly while he pulled his cock out and spat on his hand before he gave himself a few good strokes.

'Beg,' Masema said curtly.

'Fuck me, please,' you said with your cheeky laugh as you squirmed desperately on the sheets, 'please.'

You spread your legs for him, and he teasingly slapped your wet pussy with his hard cock a few times before he entered you. You arched your back and moaned with pleasure as soon as he began to thrust into you so deeply, easing you into it at first, but before you knew it he fucked you so hard into the mattress with his hand still wrapped around your throat and the other holding your waist almost bruisingly as he had his way with you.

'Fuck,' you moaned, 'ah, god, yes, fuck me.'

'You dirty slut,' Masema growled and only went harder while you clenched the sheets in your hands, not holding back or having to fake any moans and gasps while you were ravaged in all the right ways until you could barely remember your own name.

You climaxed fast but Masema kept going, promising he'd make you cum twice while he continued to ravage you. He tossed you around the bed, taking you in different positions and spanking your ass multiple times.

'I'm going to cum again,' you whined as he fucked you hard and fast.

'I told you,' he breathed, 'that's okay, sweetheart, cum for me.'

'Fuck, fuck,' you nearly screamed and clawed at the pillows your face was pressed into, 'oh, please, fuck.'

'That's it,' Masema moaned, 'that's it, that's it, cum for me.'

You came with another loud moan and Masema pulled out shortly after, he stroked his cock almost violently while he pulled you to sit up and he grabbed your face with his free hand.

'Open,' he said with a low grunt.

You did what he asked while still half dazed and allowed him to cum on your tongue as you had stuck it out for him.

'Good fucking girl,' Masema said hoarsely as he stroked himself through his high, and he then kissed you before he switched off the camera.

In between filming that first video and the second one, Masema took good care of you by making sure you were all cleaned up and comfortable while you both recovered. You were dressed in one of his comfortable oversized shirts while Masema wore his black jeans again. You had made your way downstairs to the kitchen together, where he made you some "dinner". You quietly looked at the salad he was preparing as you sat on one of the barstools, and you suddenly missed the pizza and tacos you had with Sihtric after you had sex with him that afternoon you had walked away from the photoshoot.

Masema was very kind and wanted you to be comfortable, but you secretly longed to be with Sihtric now. Masema was not as lighthearted and also very strict about his working out and diet, while your other co-star was just as good looking and not strict at all. With Sihtric it was always comfortable and you could truly be yourself, but Masema's personality was so different that you always felt you had to stay in work-mode around him, so you never really had any deep conversations or got to know each other better. Which was fine too, but you couldn't resist texting Sihtric to let him know Masema was making you a salad while you missed the fast food you had shared in the hotel weeks ago.

To your disappointment Sihtric didn't reply and left you on read, which was an odd thing for him to do because he usually replied within minutes. You tried to not think much about it and, luckily, Masema was nice looking company too so you just observed him while he served the food. You both ate in silence, which was almost awkward, and after that you helped him load the dishwasher which was just as awkward. And the time you spent together in his living room was just as awkward for you as the previous moments had been. You and Masema had chemistry during sexual activities, but other than that there was genuinely no vibe.

'So, ready to shoot?' Masema asked about an hour later, much to your relief.

'Ready when you are,' you smiled.

You went upstairs again and both undressed, and you shot what was probably the sloppiest blowjob you had ever given someone in your life. The result was filthy but you were proud, because you knew this would earn you some good money. You both fixed yourself up separately and got dressed again, but as you wanted to leave you both suddenly saw the weather outside had turned rather dangerous as rain and wind was gushing forcefully.

'It's not safe to drive,' Masema said as he stood in the front door with you, 'you should stay until it clears up.'

'But that's tomorrow morning,' you said and showed him the weather app on your phone.

Masema was quiet for a moment as he stared in the dark distance, mindlessly tracing his fingers across his bare chest.

'Well,' he said softly, 'I guess it's better to stay the night then.'

You agreed, not entirely reluctantly, but you'd rather sleep in your own bed. Or with Sihtric. And the difference between both men became evident again once you laid in bed together, on the opposite sides of the mattress and with your backs turned to each other after having said good night.

You grabbed your phone and saw there was still no response from Sihtric, which unsettled you. You decided to upload the video that was shot for you OnlyFans, so it could spread across the viewers while you were asleep, and you tried to go to sleep then. You tossed and turned in bed for a while as Masema was already snoring next to you, and you grabbed your phone again after a few long minutes, checking to see if Sihtric had texted you back already. But there still wasn't any reply, and with a lump in your throat you decided to text him again.

You: thinking of you, handsome xx

You saw Sihtric read your message immediately upon sending, as he was in his own bed, contemplating to text you before you reached out again. He ached, badly, knowing that you had been with Masema that night and having seen the video you shared had simply crushed him. He knew it was just work, and that's all it was, but he couldn't get over it and it frustrated him beyond words. Maybe this business wasn't for him anymore, he pondered before he finally wrote you back, and then threw his phone across the room and cried himself to sleep.

Your eyes teared up when Sihtric's message appeared, and you wept silently while you laid next to Masema in the dark and quiet room.

Sihtric: missing you deeply, angel, so much I feel it could kill me.

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[sillybayo]

Bayo's Black Rose Arc Analysis

Some notes before I begin:

-This ramble/essay contains heavy discussions of CSA, general sexual themes, and incest. Also, keep in mind that the characters discussed here are 12-17. While I will be looking into how sex affects them mentally and such, I will not tolerate child sexualization here. I will block anyone who makes a single weird comment or make me uncomfortable. We'll be talking about this from a pure psychological standpoint.

-This is a thought dump rather than anything formal, so I won't be dropping episode titles or numbers. I'm also going purely off of memory, and things I said in group chats. So if things lack clarity, this is why.

-I'm not saying I "cracked the black rose arc code" or anything, this is purely my interpretation that I wish to share, due to not seeing many black rose analysis', and being displeased with what some people have said and concluded. I just want to put what I think out there for others to enjoy :3.

-To avoid being repetitive and cluttered, I'll be generally referring to any character who pulls swords out as "wielders", and any character who has had a sword pulled out of them as "sheaths". Any scene where this transpires will be called a "sheathing scene."

-Once again, due to the material of this analysis, I will be blocking anyone who sexualizes the characters in notes, or anyone who I see as creepy.

With that out of the way, let us begin :3!

So I was watching rgu video essays one day, and I stumbled across one about Miki. About halfway or late into the video, they begin talking about how Miki and Kozue had sex in the black rose arc, due to the way she touched him before the sheathing scene, and the way he turned beet red when Nanami asked how it felt for the sword to be taken out. And I thought it made sense at the time, as I was still new to utena, and I only watched it once. And the allegory is clearly there in other black rose sheathing scenes (besides with utenanthy), right?

But then I thought about it more when I rewatched the juriori black rose episode a year or so later, and caught Juri blushing when Nanami asked her the same question. And...wait. Because doesn't all of the black rose sheathing scenes look..uncomfortable? The sheath cries in pain as the sword comes out of their chest, and Wakaba even forced it out of Saionji. And this weirded me out, because why would a show thats so clearly against rape of any kind go on to write something like this? Why did Miki and Juri blush about something that was so forceful? And even if they were under a mind controlled like state, why would they write the wielders to be rapists? With the way rgu writes sex and rape, it didn't seem right, y'know?

So a few months later, when I decided to continue my rewatch and reached the Wakaba black rose arc episode, thats when I truly started to think about it more. And thats when I reached a conclusion: Miki and Juri are more influenced by Touga and Saionji than they realize. And by extension, they're all influenced by Akio.

You see, Touga and Saionji clearly view Anthy as someone to be sexualized. Shes their wife, who would fulfill their every request. Even though they might not know Anthys and Akios relationship, and/or how the latter treats her, this is an undeniable shared mindset.

Even though the boys and Utena uses Anthy as a sheath in the exact same ways on the outside, you know that when its with Touga and Saionji, its sexualized. They own her. When Touga demands Anthy to kiss his sword, it feels so off that Utena couldn't bare to watch. You could argue that its because it would hurt Anthys lips, but in later episodes its clear that it isn't the issue, as Utena uses the same powerup but in a more supportive fashion rather than sexual. So whats up with that?

I say; in (most of) the wielders view, the sword is like a penis.

I know, a very silly thing to say. But I don't mean exactly. And I, of course, don't mean literally.

Do you know that scene from the scream movie, where the two guys are stabbing each other, begging for it and all? It definitely has sexual undertones, because of the mood set by the characters, and heres where I'm getting at; the idea of a long pointed object being thrusted in you.

What I think is that Anthy is so sexualized by the student council, that the idea of a simple sword being pulled out of her 14 year old south asian brown girl chest, is arousing.

So when each of the student council members become sheaths themselves, of course they think that its one of the most sexually intimate things to experience. And its so stupid, right? Its just a sword. a SWORD.

And I shouldn't be referring to the student council so generally, because Nanami is the only one who sees through this. As far as I remember, she wasn't weird in the slightest when she was Tsuwabukis sheath. And even in the apocalypse arc, shes uncomfortable when Touga kisses her, and disturbed when walking in on Akio and Anthy (but then again I haven't rewatched that episode yet, so I could be wrong). She purely meant to ask how the sword felt, with no sexual intent. Miki and Juri were just pure idiots on that part.

So then, wait, if the sword pulling in the black rose arc wasn't a metaphor for rape, then what is it?

Well, I argue that it black rose wielders follow the same mindset as some sexual assaulters when they're under the effects of Mikages reverse therapy, in a way. Its the strong feeling of thinking the sheath owes the wielder something, and that the wielder deserves it no matter what they say.

Another reference to a different piece of media, but remember when its revealed that Pearl continued to fuse with Garnet for her own personal wants, which crossed Garnets boundaries? People interpreted that scene as Pearl raping Garnet, when....no. What? Of course she isn't. Its just the general idea of your wishes being disrespected, and boundaries ignored. Do you see where I'm going with this?

The black rose wielders see something in the sheaths that they want for themselves, whether it be their love, their attention, or some secret third thing. So with nothing but entitlement and desperation in their heart, they force the sword out of their hearts, where their desires lie.

But, wait. How about other scenes with swords? Like when Anthy is Utenas sheath, and when Anthy has a thousand swords stabbed into her? Do swords still represent desire?

Well, yes! Very easily. Utena fights for the pure sake of love and friendship. She fights Saionji when hes cruel to Wakaba, and she swears to protect Anthy with all her heart. She duels with the strongest ounce of care in her soul. Thats the desire to keep her loved ones happy.

What about when Anthy what continuously impaled? Well, that was the villages desire to get to the prince. And it was Akios desire to finally revolutionize the world after so long.

I may be missing a few scenes, but this is the general idea, and I hope I got the idea across. Thats the end of my little ramble :3. As an acespec hypersexual, I already spend a lot of time deconstructing the truth behind sexual things and feelings. So this was fun to think about. I hope y'all liked this, and understood it most importantly. Toodleeess