#i just feel kinda pushed out from ace spaces sometimes despite being ace but i would also like to believe that's just in my head

[mxbrightsky]

i think sex repulsed aces and sex favorable aces should hold hands in solidarity and skip through a field together. or any other activity really, it's more about the solidarity. reblog to just fuckin hang out.

[flareish]

Overwhelmed

kuroo x reader

summary: With so many deadlines coming up the reader is overwhelm and buried in work and can’t help but to lash out. However, Kuroo is always there to pull her back

genre: college AU, fluff, pinch of angst

word count: 1.5k

warnings: none I think

a/n: I have been trying to make all of my requests gender neutral but sometimes I slip up and throw in she/her pronouns so tell me if you notice any that I didn’t catch. Enjoy!

The teachers were out to get you, you were sure of it. You push yourself every day to be the best, to be ahead of everything, all the assignments, all of your classmates just so you could possibly enjoy college as well as have good grades. But what did that get you? Impossibly high expectations. Suddenly everyone around you expected you to ace every test you did and just pull perfect essays out of nowhere. Which is exactly what just happened. You had been working on an essay all night. It hadn’t been your best work but your brain just couldn’t make anything better. That was all you had. You were almost at your limit with no end in sight. Then, despite all your hard work, your teacher handed it back to you saying that “this wasn’t the best I could do and that I shouldn’t start slacking off now”. She thought she was being helpful but right now you wanted to do was strangle her. Sure you could do better. If you didn’t have eight more assignments to do after this. Each one more mentally taxing than the next. But it’s fine, let me just rewrite this essay.

Why couldn’t you just be the kind of person who didn’t care? Or rather had given up caring. They probably learned their lesson that when you try you don’t get the reward you get more work. Why couldn’t you just not care too?

Deciding to jump back into your workload, you sit down at your desk in your dorm and begin to type. Words were kind of flowing. They weren’t exactly coherent thoughts but at least it was something to work with. As if your day couldn’t get any worse, your roommate comes barging in with three of their friends. 

“Oh oops didn’t realize you were studying in here Y/N.” Your roommate said, not actually making an effort to be any quieter though. Shooting back a quick tight smile, not wanting to be rude but also just wanting them to leave. You were hoping they were just grabbing something and then would leave but they went and sat on the bed and turned the TV on. 

You made a show of checking the time before loudly announcing that you were suppose to meet someone at the library. As much as you wanted to be petty and make them feel guilty for interrupting your study time, it was just easier to just leave. 

“I don’t think I’ve seen them do anything except study. Talk about too school for cool.” You heard one of them joke as you left.

“Ugh tell me about it. You wouldn’t believe what time they goes to bed.” Your roommate adds. You roll your eyes and trying to ignore the comments. Is it really that crazy that you’re actually trying to learn at a place where you pay crazy amounts to be taught? You were just so done.

Luckily the library was fairly quiet since it had gotten quite late. You settled into your favorite spot and got to working. Although no matter how hard you tried nothing came to you. There was one sad paragraph on your screen, you must have reread it a million times hoping to spark some kind of inspiration from it. Nothing. Your brain kept drifting off on you and you would end up staring across the library without a single thought in your head. The time just kept slipping by. The more that went the more panicky you got. This was a time that you should be working but you just couldn’t. And of course the more desperate you got for inspiration, the more it avoided you. 

You just let your head drop and hit the table. You were so done. You just wanted to scream. There was no one you could talk to either. Recently anyone that talked to you got snapped at. They were just all so calm and relaxed despite all of the work that has been coming in lately. Here you were, drowning in it, and they were happily swimming. Just the other day you and Kuroo had an argument over homework. He’s taking one of the hardest chemistry classes and he was there telling you it was going to be okay?! It just felt insulting. You knew he didn’t mean it like that but couldn’t he at least pretend to struggle? Damn you boyfriend for being so smart.

You really wanted Kuroo right now. 

As if summoned by your thoughts, you felt hands slide onto your shoulders. You tense up kinda freaked out at who is touching you until you see that it’s him. Kuroo. For a moment you wanted to just throw yourself at him and forget about your homework. But then you remember your argument and how you’ve been a monster lately and resist. He’s having none of that though and keeps his hands on you.

“How long have you been here.” He asks gently. You glance at your computer and notice that it’s almost 3 am.

“What are you doing here?! It’s 3 am.” You say startled at the fact it had gotten that late and that he was also up that late. Usually, he is asleep by ten.

“I could ask you the same thing.” He replies as he straightens and starts packing up your things.

“Uh- Hey! Wait no- give me that! I’m not done yet.” You try and snatch back your stuff but he gives you a stern look and you sink back into your seat. You suddenly realize how tired you are and surrender. He’s finished putting everything away and throws the strap of your back over his shoulder. Prepared to carry your bag for you. Now you feel drained. Your limbs all feel heavy that it’s exhausting to even think about getting up.

“Come on let’s get you back to your dorm.” He mumbles pulling you up by your hand. You let him, flying up from your seat and onto your feet. You land right in his chest and you don’t want to go anywhere but here. For the first time in weeks, you feel calm and secure.

“Can I just stay here for a minute,” Your voice cracks as tears slip down your face. He didn’t say anything, he just wrapped his arms around you and hugged you close to his body. In this moment you felt nothing but love. The relief and comfort you felt was enough to make you cry harder. You don’t know how long you were stood there but no matter how long it was Kuroo never once rushed you. He just let you let it out. Once he saw that you had calmed down he gently pull back, bringing a hand to your cheek to wipe away any stray tears.

“You ready to head back now?” He asked again, planning on walking you back to your dorm.

“I don’t wanna,” You pout, “There’s a ton of people in there and I don’t wanna see any of them.” You are still salty at your roommate and their rude friends.

“Do you want to come to my dorm?” He asks, “Kenma was passed out when I left so it should be quiet.” You nod. You feel him put your backpack on you and you’re confused. You were kind of hoping he would take your backpack for you. You know be a gentleman and all. Then he squats down in front of you. 

“Hop on.” This was pretty normal for the two of you so despite your sleepiness you bounce up onto his back. He adjusts you higher on his back before leaving the library. Waving to library worker on the late shift who giggled at the two of you. 

You snuggled your face into his neck and loosely wrapped your arms around his neck. His footsteps seemed to lull you like a lullaby. You fell into a weird state as your body sleeping but your mind was awake. Hearing everything clear as day but the thought of opening your eyes or moving a muscle seeming impossible. 

You start waking up more when you realize that you have made it to his dorm, letting him toss you down on the bed. You throw your backpack off to the side and head straight for under the covers.

“Ah ah! You’re in dirty clothes,” he gently complains, no real bite behind it. You grumble but let him pull you over to the edge of the bed. You had been so close to sleep. He slides your shirt over your head and replaces it with one of his hoodies. Only then once you’re in his clean clothes does he let you snuggle back into his bed. This time with him in there as well. 

“Goodnight my love.” You finally slip into a peaceful state. You still had a lot of work to do but at least for tonight you will rest without worry. Tomorrow you know you need to make up with Kuroo but you know he could never stay mad at you. Come the morning you know Kuroo will help you with everything. He’s finished giving you space, now you’re stuck with him.

[i-did]

hi hello i couldn't sleep last night so i was scrolling thru all ur asks and stuff and ur opinions and analyses are so interesting!!! and then afterwards i was thinking about what u were saying about mlm smut and i'd also been thinking about such things a little bit recently bc like.....at a certain point it becomes quite clear that the vast majority of smut-writing is just imitation. like there's the sex noise verb list and all and the whole general mechanics of the sex and those things just .... replicate over and over. and the whole thing w people writing mlm vs wlw smut regardless of their own sexual orientation..... like i feel like a big part of that is just a self-perpetuating thing. like if u have not had sex and u r getting all ur (pleasure-related) sex ed from fandom (even if u do watch porn, that doesn't rlly tell u how to describe stuff? idk) regardless of What fandom , the majority is going to be mlm smut. which is itself majority imitation of other mlm smut, imitating and imitating back to whoever knows what the first smut fanfic was etc. there's just way More to mimic than there is on the women side of things. which then becomes a self-perpetuating thing, bc the mimicry continues and generates more and more. and---if there are fundamental misunderstandings of anatomy involved---those self-perpetuate as well. and maybe even exaggerate. and yeah. does this all make sense? idk i was just thinking about it. like all the stereotypes and stuff continue bc writers are getting their inspo from other writers rather than their own brains. or something. idk!!!!! it's just all... divorced from reality? bc words. or something!! i hope u get what i'm trying to say. just thoughts i've been thinking. anyway i think ur thoughts are cool. and ur writing. ok bye have a good day!!

Okay yeah this is kinda messy but hope u see this, uhh yeah I think you're right about the echo chamber effect fr about stuff. I think it's a mix of projecting too sometimes. talk more under the cut and also link to a video essay since I love video essays.

Here’s a video that sort of touches on this topic: 

“Gay fanfiction” by Sarah Z. (has CC)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H8E_C00dKwI

This video begins to talk about fetishization at the end, but also… not really. The words “gay fanfiction” is used as a catchall, when really gay fanfiction is largely mlm written by non-mlm.

Fandom is a largely women's space dominated by the female gaze in a media industry world that is dominated by men and the male gaze. I'm really glad women have this space to explore creativity and queerness, and I don't expect the female gaze to go away, but I am still ultimately bummed out I can’t read most fanfic or interact with most fandom spaces without having fetishization in my face. 

So about 80% of fandom is women, and most of those women aren't straight, but 90% of those women prefer mlm ships. Why don’t they prefer wlw ships? Well definitely part of it is the fact that queerbaiting is centered around white straight men, and then there is also the fact that women tend not to be written as well charcter wise. But the fact still remains that you get jerjean getting priority over Layla and Alvarez who are in canon just as much and are a canon wlw couple who actually interact as well as Alvarez could likely be a woc because of her Hispanic last name. Korasami doesn’t get nearly as much hype as zuko and saka, despite the fact that they are 2 fully dimensional characters who canonly kiss and hold hands, something the creators fought for and ended up having to sacrifice another reboot for. 

I do believe the fandom echo-chamber is largely responsible for… a lot of things, like you're saying. But what's interesting is that the complaints I've heard about visual porn from non mlm in the fandom space is that they can’t get off to it because its for the male gaze and misogynistic usually. But they also don't seem to notice how the mlm smut circles has the female gaze and is also… almost always mlm. If it was a pure anatomical not knowing thing, I get that, but I also think that leads to the question of “then why the male body for porn, and not your own? The one you know and are familiar with?” 

I know some people want to get outside of their own body for porn and don’t want to think of their own anatomy at all, but overall I'm still uncomfortable. If an anglo said “well I watch porn of only Mexicans so I don't self insert” I'm gonna be like … hhhh in a similar way. I understand people “like what they like” but I wish they also noticed said patterns in the first place. I understand the t4t tumblr porn circle, and how it's different from cis people who only watch trans porn. 

I actually wished that instead of fandom focusing on mlm ships where some asshole guy hits on bottom troupe charcter for top troupe character to save, was instead… a wlw character experiencing said shitty getting hit on and other wlw swooping in. what's interesting is fandom writes a lot about misogynistic experiences without often realizing it. Ive read fanfic where guys get called sluts for sleeping with people or called bitch for speaking their mind, these arent things men usually experience, but rather women. Fandom has a lot of internalized misogyny and also queerphobia imo. Women characters often get pushed to the sidelines and men become the canvas for female fans to project onto. 

There is this natural inclination to mlm. When people are talking about “gay shipping” or “gay books” or “gay feels” or even just “gay” mlm is what’s largely in mind. I honestly am kinda saddened by this because if gay fanfiction was really solely about writing more to feel represented, then you would see a lot of bi and ace and lesbian rep, but this isn't the case. Queer women are seriously underrepresented, and I want to hear their stories and read them in fanfiction as well as published. 50% of lgbt literature is mlm, and of that its largely written by women. Becky Albertalli, Rainbow Rowell, Maggie Stiefvater, are the YA big names and are all women writing mlm. Red white and royal blue is written by Casey McQuiston and Captive prince (which is not YA) is written by C. S. Pacat, who is non-binary, but is also TME and not mlm. These are all the big names in mlm lit, behind them is some gay men, but honestly their stories aren't preferred, they're not the right “flavor” for the consumers usually, who are largely women. In general YA consumers and authors are women, but I wish that they… just wrote about women too. I think there is a certain… snowball effect to the overrepresentation of mlm representing the whole LGBT community that leads to fetishization, as well as misogyny playing a factor in: less women characters being written well to write fanfic on, when they are written well they're taken less seriously or the audience struggles to relate to them, they're less marketable then men. 

Idk I never feel “seen” or “represented” by any of the books above, which don't address boyhood and manhood and queerness intersecting really, and AFTG doesn’t either. I relate to AFTG as a trauma victim who has experienced a lot of what many of the characters go through and have gone through in the EC as well as them just overall being very well written characters, but I don't relate to it as a mlm really. I've never seen like.. gay voice or being straight passing or femphobia or how boyhood can be affected from a young age by those around you sensing you're ‘other’ or if you didn't experience this you feel outside the mlm community. Let alone sub cultures like bear and leather and pup, at most you see the word “he's such a twink” in fandom which... i fr hate non mlm using that word because it's usually used to replace the f-slur essentially, used derogatorily or to call him “such a bottom” and stuff like that. It’s like a joke or an insult.

Long story short, idk mang this was a ramble and I think I'm coning down with something. I wanna see more queer women rep and women authors writing about being a queer woman too. I think it's a complex web of fetishization and a bit of forbidden love yaoi culture (or it used to be in the BOYXBOY days) as well as misogyny on an industry level, creator level, as well as reader/consumer and fandom level. I don’t think it’s inherently wrong to explore other peoples stories and what we read has to be segregated, “only mlm are allowed to read and write mlm, only wlw are allowed to read and write wlw,” but I also think author’s intent and audience and background is telling, as well as overall statistics. Like about an hour ago I was looking for cookbooks in spanish or in english, and I was looking for some mexican food cook books, but I had to look for them using words in spanish because otherwise what came up was a bunch of “fiesta party, easy as uno dos tres authentic cooking!” and I was like… hm. Since I could tell they were marketing to anglos. (also the author’s last names were like michelle smith, james cooper, and this could be for a variety of reasons, but I trust Hispanic names more tbh and deadass would look at the authors pictures and if they had other books in Spanish or what their specialties were.)

anyways. not sure how to end this. uhm if anyone has any book recs (my to read list is like 500 books tho no joke) preferably not YA white mlm written by a white lady, hopefully queer women written by queer woman, LMK, I need more wlw and queer women stories on my list. I have a decent amount but always looking for more. I kinda wanna link my goodreads or my storygraph but I also don't want to get doxxed and it has my legal name on it so.

Also, I'm dyslexic and using spell check but if there's like some wild typos my b.

[biblio-bitch]

Detroit Evolution Commentary Pt. 3 [FINAL]

It’s been a while, sorry. Life sucks ass sometimes and I had to do some transferring to my new laptop. I’ll write down some more fun facts as an apology. Disclaimer: This is all stuff I noticed, inferred, or interpreted. I didn’t write the film, anything I’ve interpreted is just that, an interpretation based on things I noticed using my experiences and knowledge. 

Fun fact #1: I have attempted to write in a proper novel style at least five times. After watching DE and watching @octopunkmedia ‘s script breakdowns and such, I've started writing scripts instead. I’m much farther along in those than I ever have been in books. 10/10 amazing for my visual based concepts.

Fun fact #2: My mental health was rapidly declining and I was losing interest in quite literally everything at the time the film was released. Watching the film and fixating on it for a month straight not only inspired me but helped me regain control of my life. Watching streams by the cast and Michelle while I worked for school made my productivity skyrocket.

Fun fact #3: I recently developed a tic that I now can’t get rid of. It was out of control for about twenty minutes right before I began writing this post. However, when I began re-watching the film (partially because it’s a comfort for me and I’m quite honestly terrified of what’s happening in the US right now) it stopped. So that’s fun.

As usual, spoilers and swearing under the cut! Quick note: If there should be a trigger warning on this or anything else I post, please let me know! I’m horrible at remembering to tag triggers. I’ll also be doing some quick posts on Umbrella Academy and my severe obsession with Jason Todd soon. Have fun!

As usual, here’s a list of people I know the users of in case you’d like to check any of them out. I’m likely missing people so feel free to let me know who I’m missing so I can add them!

Maximilian Kroger - Nines (@ maximiliankroger)

Christopher (Chris) Trindade - Gavin (@ trindabago)

Michael Smallwood - Chris Miller (@ michaelsmallwoodforever)

Carla Kim - Tina Chen (@ carlahkim)

Jillian Geurts - Ada (@ jilbobaggins_nyc)

Michelle Iannantuono - (@ octopunkmedia)

JJ Goller - Lazzo (@ quasar.cos)

Brett Mullen - Cinematographer (@ brettmullendirector)

Austin Butts - Sound Design (@ austinbytts)

Tiare Solis - Valerie (@ tiareleiana)

So I decided to put all of the rest into this post. It’s a long one. Not even that sorry about it bc I love this film with my entire heart. Warning for me getting sidetracked. I use a lot of Supernatural references but it’s because I’m visiting my dad and he’s binge watching the show. I like Dean and only Dean, don’t bully me for it.

The Wrist Grip™️ in the bedroom before Nines moves back

Shoutout to Maximilian Kroger’s muscles u go dude

Lighting Symbolism™️, big theme through the movie, honestly I think it’s beautiful and they did a wonderful job with it.

The little nod from Gavin as he starts talking about his nightmare 

You can see Gavin gearing up to move, like not in a normal way, in a “oh god I don’t know if I have the energy to do this” way and that’s Relatable™️

The little smile from Nines as they sit together

The SHARK PLUSHIE I LOVE HIM (THE SHARK HAS AN INSTAGRAM @ sharktreuse)

Nines being domestic, making coffee and breakfast, being Soft.

Shirt change??? Either I’m blind or he’s wearing a different shirt in the morning (He is. He’s wearing a t shirt at night and a buttoned collar shirt in the morning. Perhaps he changed? He’s wearing normal pants so he probably changed but he’s not wearing that same shirt in the next scene)

Ada eye rolling at them being passive aggressive dumbasses. Same. Apparently Jillian kept fucking with them which is,, so valid. 

The lighting in this scene (the office pt. 2) makes Maximilian look Android-white and outlined in the CyberLife blue-ish color. Very symbolic, I have no idea if it was intentional.

Another shoutout, this time to Maximilian’s eyebrows, the expressiveness is *chef’s kiss*.

“You can thank me later, Casanova.” Nines: *confused Android noises* 

Honorable mention to Michael’s Foo Fighters t shirt in the bar, it’s vintage.

Nines is in fact wearing a different shirt now. Not the same shirt from the morning bedroom scene. I also think he’s wearing a different jacket. Less of a peacoat and more of a leather jacket. Nice.

Shoutout to Tina’s (not irl) wife, Valerie! And her weird crush on Hank! I honestly can’t wait to see her in Seven Deadly Synths!!

Ada DODGING the questions that Nines is asking because she is SHADY. 

Also, he looks to Gavin when he talks about wanting to be more human. Recurring theme of him perceiving himself as lacking because of his ace-ness/android-ness, like he can’t give Gavin what he wants. Honestly I know that the android thing is a thinly veiled metaphor for race in canon but I kinda like thinking of it as a metaphor for being LGBT+ and in Nines’ case, specifically ace. Might not make sense but it does in my brain??

Gavin Senses Are Tingling and Nines is GONE. Leaving the bar for ur not-bf to try to talk things out like adults??? King shit.

Also electric lighter, fun, I genuinely didn’t know those existed

SHIRT WITH UNBUTTONED COLLAR

“You don’t want to help me, you want to fix me.” What a loaded line. Because in a way, it’s almost true? Like, Nines has this entire simulation of Gavin in his ideal world, and obviously that version of Gavin has probably been idealized at least a bit. Nature of humanity, and Nines might not be human but he’s got the Brain Things. And at that moment, it’s nearly true that Nines wants Gavin to be like that ideal Gavin. Obviously Nines wants Gavin as Gavin, but there’s the edge of that simulation there, still. 

But Nines does want to help Gavin, and that’s where he’s wrong. Nines wants Gavin to get better, wants to help stop the nightmares, etc. But by pointing that out, I think it’s partially why Nines can accept letting go of Simulation!Gavin when Ada attacks him. Because he knows that the simulation of Gavin will never be the real Gavin, and this line sort of helps him understand that he can’t really keep Sim!Gavin anyways.

Again idk if that’s legit but that’s definitely something I felt from that while watching.

Nines is constantly very controlled, but when he walks away from Gavin you can see him straining to keep that composure and not let his anger show. 

Ada looking So Done With This Shit when Nines comes back from talking with Gavin outside of the bar

“I’m sure this will be like...every other time.” Oh honey. Oh my sweet child. I am so very sorry. It most definitely will not be.

Ada’s exasperated Eyebrow Raise before taking a drink. If that ain’t the mood sis.

I love Ada’s bat wings on her outfits. 

Gavin being a stalker and putting his hood up. 

“I’m...certain that most of the credit can go to you.” IMMEDIATE ANGER. Must Defend Boyfriend.

I SO WANTED HIM TO SAY “WISDOM” WHILE TALKING ABOUT GAVIN’S SKILLS BECAUSE IT WOULD MIRROR HIM TELLING GAVIN THAT HE ISN’T WISE BEFORE THEY LEFT FOR THE STAKEOUT. He didn’t, but instinct is a better word for Gavin anyways.

Nines has Suspicion™️...press X for doubt... 

*Only vaguely related rant warning*

I do feel that we as a fandom tend to make Connor almost childishly innocent despite him being likely one of the least kind and least innocent characters. The characterization of Nines in this--and pardon me for the off topic rant--where he’s a fully grown man and acts like it is so much more realistic. Nines is a cop, as is Connor. 

Even post deviancy, they were designed and equipped to handle murder. Nines, in a lot of fandom content, tends to come off as an exasperated older brother or a gritty and mean detective, or even worse, essentially a sociopath who feels nothing in contrast to Connor’s childish and extreme innocence. I dislike both. Seeing Nines be a normal fucking person is so relieving, I’m serious. There’s still those elements of ‘oh he’s only been properly alive for like a year, right? He probably doesn’t get Chris’ Casanova reference.’ but it’s not to such an extreme that it overtakes all of his personality traits.

Like, yeah, ok, I get why a lot of fandom content does that. In order to balance what we see Connor do (and in order to further push the Hank as a father line) we over-emphasize the not getting references and such. Honestly I see the same in content for Castiel from Supernatural. Nines, when he’s added, often HAS to be a lot darker in order to make that seem not as jarring and unrealistic.

Doesn’t mean I enjoy it. If you do? That’s great, good for you, but I don’t like seeing those characters be portrayed as such one dimensional extremes. People aren’t like that. On the off chance that someone is such an extreme, there’s still other aspects of their personality.

DE has done an amazing job at not flattening their personalities. Nines and Gavin are three-dimensional and incredibly interesting characters I find myself invested in every time I watch it.

*Onto the commentary again.*

Gavin is still being a stalker

“Particular fascination with the RK line” AHAHA funny. She’s also an RK, and she likely knows more than Nines because her programming is based on information gathering. Her fascination begins and ends with what their programming can do for her.

The little computer details in Ada’s eyes as she copies Nines’ OS, and again in Nines’ eyes when he’s in the alley alone. I believe Michelle did all of that and I am just amazed every time I watch. 

The warped voice effect.

Gavin shifting to hold Nines as soon as he passes out

The ethereal colored lighting is very good for the mood, space hospital vibes

Shoutout to the latex suit they put Maximilian in! That’s not CG! He’s wearing a full body white latex suit. I’m so sorry.

Gavin looks so tired talking to Dr. Maria. His posture is defensive, pulled into himself. Shoulders hunched, arms pulled in. Eye bags, messy hair. Boy looked messed up. Somebody hug him.

Nines’ hair being disheveled and messy in the corrupted Zen Garden, rivaling his assertion that in his ideal world (Aka the normal Zen Garden) his appearance is polished, signifying the loss of control and the loss of the Zen Garden being a safe, ideal space for him. Same concept with Sim!Gavin being corrupted.

Nines: *wakes up in his mindspace*

Also Nines, immediately: GAVIN!!1!!1

Nines believes in CONSENT!! You do not go into someone’s program without asking, ADA.

Ada’s “poor widdle baby” face as Nines is freaking out because she trapped him. Mood.

Tina wearing a low turtleneck and a flannel is Peak Gay, especially next to Gavin “I wear the same leather jacket+hoodie combo every single day and probably the same jeans for a month” Reed, aka the most disastrous and chaotic bisexual I have ever seen. Again, a mood, I honestly felt that one.

The face when Nines realizes that Ada isn’t deviant yet. 

Gavin is blaming himself somebody stop this idiot. 

“Not without Nines.” What a softie.

“The last thing I said to him was ‘I don’t need you’.” BITCH WHAT THE FUCK MY HEART.

Gavin calling Tina “T” in that soft voice is so sweet omg

Ugh the bisexual LIGHTING is KILLING ME, ESPECIALLY as Gavin sits at Nines’ bedside

Tina encouraging Gavin. WLW/MLM solidarity. 

Fun fact: Chris Trindade told Maximilian not to react at all to the big speech but Maximilian literally started crying during it and there’s footage somewhere of the Dramatic Single Tear rolling down his face while he’s still ‘in stasis’.

Yes, I double checked the streams to make sure I got this right, I love the concept though.

Look I cannot get into the speech because I will write 1.5k words on it, but I will say this: It made me cry. The acting, the writing, it’s iconic. The amount of love and devotion they got without even saying the words “I love you” was amazing. Chris is so very talented. 

THERES A TAKE WHERE GAVIN FALLS ASLEEP NEXT TO NINES’ HOSPITAL BED AKSDGAKL IM SCREAMING

Tina is the best wingman ngl

The glitches in Zen Gavin are amazing. The sequence when he’s deleting the Zen Garden is also amazing. I use amazing a lot but it’s deserved.

Nines deleting the Zen Garden and Sim!Gavin is very symbolic of letting go of all of the fake stuff, letting go of the fear he was holding that kept him from confessing to Gavin and I love that

Nines sitting silently straight up. 

Gavin is highly intelligent and I’m so glad Octopunk embraces that. 

*another vaguely related rant warning*

Ok let me tell y’all a thing because this RUINS MY LIFE. People tend to take characters like Percy Jackson or Dean Winchester, whose intelligence isn’t outwardly obvious from the get-go, and remove it entirely. Percy is reduced to an idiot who can’t tie his own shoes and Dean is often shown basically unable to research without Sam. Both of those are bullshit. 

Percy has ADHD and Dyslexia, so when often we categorize smart as only book-smart, Percy’s intelligence as a battle strategist and his actual knowledge gets erased. Dean is usually the more physical and shoot-first-never-ask-questions type, and his intelligence is severely downplayed. He made an EMP detector from scratch. Made a shotgun, remembers how to kill things, is a very good hunter, especially on his own. But that’s thrown away because he’s not book-smart.

I despise when people take characters who are talented and smart in ways that aren’t just reciting the periodic table and reduce them to muscles and angst or drooling children. 

Octopunk having a scene where Gavin is working through a case, already having done the things that Chris, someone who was only recently promoted, suggests, is just affirming Gavin’s intelligence in a way I wish I could be not surprised by. Gavin is smart, and luckily I haven’t seen much downplaying that fact. He’s a detective for a reason. Unfortunately I think it might be because the fandom tends to turn Connor and Nines into actual children, but a win is a win.

Now I’m not saying I don’t love a good himbo character but I literally had to stop interacting with Percy Jackson content because people wrote him as incapable.

*Moving on*

“I think I can help with that.” Bitch why are you so dramatic I love him so much.

Nines’ t-shirt says “Detroit City Marathon” 

“You...undead asshole.” What an iconic line. I need a t-shirt. 

“I...hate you.” “You love me.” Harkens back to the beginning where the roles are reversed. Yes I used that unironically. Words are fun.

Gavin looking scared right before The Kiss™️ 

THE PULSE POINT!! THE SCENE WAS SUPER EMOTIONAL SO MICHELLE WANTED THEM TO DO YOGA ZEN SHIT TO PREPARE AND THEN THEY JUST DID THE THING BUT THEY PUT IN THE PULSE POINT 

ANYWAYS THAT’S WHAT GAVIN IS FEELING FOR ON NINES’ WRIST RIGHT BEFORE THE KISS.

I thought that was cute when I learned it in one of the streams.

Nines’ LED spinning blue when they finally kiss asgladkaf 

“What dipshit programmed you to do that?” “I’m the most advanced android ever made, detective-“ “oh you are such a fuckin’ prick!” “Takes one to know one.” I canNOT with them, I laughed my ASS off

The little broken laugh Nines does

Nines rubbing his hands over Gavin’s while they talk about Gavin’s jacket

Shoutout to Chris’ surprised pikachu face. (Tina is also there) That was a joke take, it’s in the gag reel, too. The face wasn’t supposed to make it into the film but Michelle added it. (In the gag reel, Carla yells “Let’s go to Denny’s!” At the end.) 

And Ada’s leather pants. Honestly?? She’s so pretty. I love her. They’re all really attractive it’s actually terrifying.

Nines and Tina being a part of the Gay Turtleneck Gang

Nines’ untucked turtleneck

Tina being a Smart Girl. (Nines calling her “Officer” and her replying with “I’ll make detective someday.”

Chris being Exhausted during the whole meeting. Me too dude.

Chris and Tina doing literally nothing while Gavin and Nines have a whole heart to heart

The WHITE COAT. Tina in her blues. Chris’ Foo Fighters shirt. They’re such icons but they absolutely look like a group of gay ppl who did NOT decide on a theme.

The fight sequence is impressive, considering that they’re literally not stunt actors. I’m not a fight choreographer or stunt person so That’s really all I have to say on that.

Chris patting Gavin’s gun after he explains what he’s doing. \

As a Jason Todd lover the crowbar is unfortunate (had to, sorry)

Nines’ smirk and the TURTLENECK as he spins away from Ada with the crowbar. Iconic. The Big Dick Energy. Especially for someone who doesn’t have a dick.

Chris being a Dad when Gavin runs off to go stop the body calibration

Ada just YEETS Gavin. Iconic.

Ada: *doing the villain “you won’t shoot me, you’re too moral” thing*

Chris: Shut the fuck up *shoots her*

Deviancy sequence, iconic

“You’re awake now” bitch get your own tag line, Markus became Robot Jesus for this shit

He’s HOLDING HER HAND while DEFENDING HER!! PLATONIC HAND HOLDING

Gavin trusting Nines’ decision immediately. Amazing. THAT’S LOVE BITCH.

The SMILES after Ada leaves!! They know they made the right choice!

Ugh the COLOR SYMBOLISM!! This is one thing that Michelle has touched on herself! Gavin isn’t wearing white in this scene because he’s not ‘fixed’, he never will be! He has trauma and he’s just barely beginning to heal from it with Nines’ help. He’s wearing grey, lighter than his usual, but still grey because they aren’t pure or innocent and they’re not perfect!! And that’s the fucking point!! It’s also a contrast against Sim!Gavin wearing white! Sim!Gavin was an idealized version of Gavin in Nines’ idealized world!! Real Gavin isn’t that!! So he’s wearing grey!!

Gavin immediately understanding that Nines is Ace and that it’s ok!! Beautiful!

“You’ve been a whole person since the day you woke up” YES!! YOU DO NOT NEED SEX TO BE WHOLE!! FUCK YEAH!!! (this is ace excitement. In the months since writing this I realized I’m aro-ace and trans so fuck yeah for ace rep.) 

Gavin being a dick and making Nines tell him about the skin thing

THE KISS!! They slowly move more into the light!! Because they’re getting better TOGETHER!!

Ok before I sign off, it’s only 3 am so I think I’m awake enough to talk about this, I like that they bring up that Gavin has like, actual issues that he needs to get through. Let’s be 100% honest here, I see Gavin as having ADHD, depression, and probably a form or symptoms of PTSD. He’s kinda fucked up and I’m gonna be real here he needs some therapy. He’s got trauma and needs to work through it. 

I like that at the end they explicitly have Nines understand and accept that that’s what needs to happen. As someone who has actually had relationships ruined because of trauma (on both sides) that we were unprepared to work through together, if I had seen something like that? Game changer. As it was, most relationships I had seen were idealized and seemed to “fix” those issues by way of just being in a relationship. Thanks major media. 

Now that the Detroit Evolution post series is over, I’m gonna be a bit sentimental and say that this film quite literally changed my life. Seriously. Michelle is such a big inspiration for me and I can only hope to be the same for someone else. 

If you ever have a chance to check out any of the amazing people who worked on this film, please do. To put into context how big this was: I changed my ideal college major from Forensics to Film. 

That’s it that’s all, ending this post at 3:24 am before I literally start crying over it. Thanks for suffering through my long-winded explanations, I hope you enjoyed. Have a wonderful day.

[domesticatedantelope]

proximity

a self-indulgent next door neighbors au for rodaw: best boy’s day

Pairing: Logan x MC

Rating: T

Word Count: 3k

i. 

Logan moves in on the first hot day of summer.

It takes him three long hours in the sun and several trips back up and down the chipped paint staircase at the end of the hall. By the time he maneuvers his beaten old futon mattress through the front door, his arms ache and his t-shirt sticks with sweat between his shoulder blades. 

There’s never much to move: whatever clothes fit in the back of the Devore, and just enough junk furniture to rest his feet on. At the end of the day, his footsteps echo a little too loudly against all the empty wall space, but the place is safe and quiet. And it’s something to call his own. 

He’s hunting through the boxes strewn in landmine fashion across the floor for a clean shirt when a few timid knocks break the silence. He pauses with his arms half-pushed through the sleeves, listening intently, and he thinks he hears a sigh from beyond the door as he approaches.

A quick look through the peephole offers him a fisheye glimpse of freckles and dark curls. The girl outside his door bites down on her bottom lip and fidgets where she stands, finally daring a glance up into the tiny glass lens, where her wide eyes unknowingly meet his own.

The notion sinks in slowly, unfamiliar. 

Logan has relocated more times than he cares to remember — lifted his life by the roots and left the rest behind — but this, he realizes, is a first. 

Because he’s fairly certain people just don’t do this anymore. 

Or at least he was, until his neighbor showed up with a plate of cookies in her hands. 

She startles when he opens the door, the hint of a blush coloring the freckles on her cheeks as she blinks up at him and offers a shy smile. “Hi. Sorry to bother you,” she starts, and the sound of her voice brings the beach to mind, the soft way the waves sigh against the sand. “I know you just got done moving in, but I, um… thought I should introduce myself. I’m Mercy. I live in 104.” She shifts the plate to one hand and holds the other out for him to shake. 

Logan finds himself smiling as he takes it, especially when it makes the blush deepen on her face. “Logan.” He leans against the doorframe with a grin, nodding toward the plate in her hands. “Those for me?”

Her smile widens to match his, more certain. “Only if you like snickerdoodles. Otherwise I will have to insist you let me bake you something else.”

The plate is still warm when she passes it over, a heap of golden cookies piled neatly beneath a shiny slip of plastic wrap. It might be the most wholesome thing he’s ever seen. “Thank you. Really. You didn’t have to do that.”

She averts her gaze then, toying with the tail end of a curl. “Well, my mother would be disappointed if I didn’t do the neighborly thing and welcome you with fresh-baked cookies.” She breathes a nervous laugh, and when she speaks again her words all tumble together in a rush. “Also, I teach piano lessons every other day, and the walls here can be really thin, and I just wanted to say sorry ahead of time, and I promise it’ll only be during business hours, and if we’re ever too loud, you can totally come over and let me know, and—!”

“Hey, it’s okay,” Logan cuts in gently, holding a hand out as if he might stem the tide of her apologies. “Seriously, don’t worry about it. I’m hardly ever home anyways. I can promise it won’t bother me.”

She tugs her lip between her teeth again. “You say that now, but wait until you’re hearing off-key Für Elise for the fifth time in a row. You’ll be begging the landlord to evict me.”

He laughs. “Trust me, Mercy. I wouldn’t do that to you.” He feels a smirk tilt at the corner of his mouth, and drops his voice conspiratorially low. “Besides, I’ve already taken the bribe. No walking back on it now.”

The last of the anxious energy seems to ease from her shoulders when she giggles, and the smile she beams up at him is sweeter even than the smell of cinnamon and sugar. He wonders absently if kissing her would taste like cookies, too. “In that case… I guess we have a deal. The snickerdoodles in exchange for your silence.”

“I’ve had worse deals.”

Her gaze lingers a moment longer on the shape of his smirk before she blinks and glances down the hall toward her own door. “I, um… have some studying I need to get back to, but... it was really nice meeting you, Logan.”

“Not as nice as meeting you,” he assures her smoothly, rewarded by the delicate pink flush that warms her cheeks again. It’s far too easy, summoning that blush; he thinks he could get dangerously used to it. “Thanks again. I’ll bring the plate back as soon as I’m done with it.”

“No rush. You know where to find me.” She arcs a small, cheery wave at him, and he watches the waves of her hair bounce as she walks the short distance back to her apartment. There’s an eager sort of warmth that sits in his chest when he kicks the front door shut behind him. His steps still echo when he walks, but if he’s quiet he can just make out the sound of Mercy moving in the next apartment over, and the noise of nearby life softens the empty feeling in the room. He takes a bite of cookie that melts perfectly on his tongue, and smiles as he settles in to unpack.

ii. 

Logan wasn’t kidding about never being home.

Mercy doesn’t see him for another couple weeks, aside from the short interlude when he drops by to bring her plate back — when the firm broad of his shoulders fill her doorway, and he shoots her that same tempting smile, and it feels like tilting her face up into the sun. The image of it floats across her thoughts, firmly imprinted in the fleeting daydreams between essays and lessons and exams. 

The summer starts to sink its teeth in, bleeding hazy heat waves well into the dark of night. Her shoddy AC unit struggles helplessly against the swelter, and she finds her only solace curled up in a chair below her open window, begging any semblance of a breeze to whisper through. She’s on her third night in a row of letting ice cubes slowly melt against her neck when she hears the unmistakable sound of a window scraping open. The crash of boots on metal quickly follows, and she cranes her neck to peer over the sill and see the familiar shape of dark hair and wide shoulders on the fire escape. 

“Logan?”

He turns at the sound of his name, a grin stretching across his face when he spots her through the window. “Hey, Mercy. You trying to escape the heat, too?”

“Trying,” she confirms, and reaches for the tray of ice at her side, holding it out toward him in lethargic invitation. “Ice cube?”

With a pleasant, rumbly laugh, he plucks a slightly melted ice cube loose and folds his fingers in around it. “Thanks. You know, it’s a lot better out here. Feel like joining me?”

His smile leaves a flutter in her stomach; her daydreams haven’t done it justice. It’s been a while since she clambered through her window, but she manages to climb over the sill with little difficulty. Logan offers her a hand to help her through, his fingers still cold from the ice, only letting her go once her feet are firmly planted on the fire escape. 

And oh, he was so right.

She can’t help a blissful sigh as a breeze lifts at the curled ends of her hair, cooling the flush of heat from her skin. “Oh, my god.”

Logan chuckles knowingly beside her. “Better?”

“The best.” Mercy joins him at the railing, where he rests his elbows and peers out over the darkness of the alley below. An easy quiet settles in the space between them while she revels in the first glimpse of relief she’s felt all night, soothed by the busy melodies of city life around them, voices and laughter and traffic on the distant highway. He’s rolled the short sleeves of his t-shirt up his shoulders, leaving the bronze skin of his arms uninterrupted, and she finds herself almost grateful for the heat when a blush starts to rise in her cheeks. 

He seems to notice her staring, because he arches a brow and tilts his head to smirk down at her. “Come here often?”

Despite her mortification, Mercy laughs. His expression softens at the sound, something tender in the angle of his smile. “Sometimes,” she admits, her finger tracing idle patterns at the metal of the railing. “On clear nights mostly, when I want to see the stars.”

His gaze flickers from her face up to the sliver of night sky barely visible between apartment buildings. “Kinda hard to see the stars from here, isn’t it?”

“It’s not the best view,” she agrees with a quiet laugh. “Just enough to remind me that they’re up there, I guess.”

Abruptly, Logan steps away from the railing, a look of determination forming in the dark of his eyes as he turns to face her. “I want to show you something.”

She blinks, thoughts scattered by the eager way he grins at her. “What is it?”

“A surprise,” he insists teasingly, and holds his hand out to her once more. “Do you trust me?”

Mercy touches his palm, and her heart skips when he folds their hands together. “I do.”

The stairs tremble beneath their feet as they climb steadily higher. Logan glances back at every landing, his grip comfortingly certain around her own. It’s another five flights to the roof, and he slows to a stop at the last ladder to let her ascend first.

The breeze is stronger here, whipping at the loose strands of her hair as she steps out onto the open rooftop. Dark blue sky stretches unobstructed above her, and she tips her head back to drink in the faint sparkle of stars that manage to break out over the city lights. She feels Logan step up beside her, and when she finally tears her eyes away from the stars to meet his gaze, the wonder in his features steals her breath.

This time when her blush returns, she doesn’t look away. “Thank you, Logan. It’s perfect.”

He doesn’t look away either. “Anytime.”

iii. 

His eye still fucking hurts. Every time he blinks, the sting reminds him of wet streets beneath his cheek and the brutal pain of impact, Salazar’s face a snarl of gritted teeth and bleeding mouth and the crunch of his nose breaking under Logan’s fist. He clenches his hand at the memory, feeling the prickle of split skin across his knuckles. 

He doesn’t notice Mercy in the hallway until he’s nearly walking into her, the startled shock of her voice shaking him from his anger. 

“Logan! I’m sorry, I didn’t see — oh, my god, are you okay?” 

Wincing, he angles his injured eye away from her. “It’s nothing. Took an elbow in a pick-up game. It looks worse than it is.”

Something about the concern in her expression eats away at him, like battery acid in the chasm of his chest. Her gaze passes shrewdly from his black eye to his split lip to the busted knuckles in his hands before a frown settles on her mouth. She bites her lip, unconvinced. “Well… at least let me get you something to help with the swelling.” She reaches out to squeeze his fingers before disappearing into her apartment, and he stands frozen in the momentary silence, staring down at his palm, where his hand still feels warm from her touch.

Mercy returns shortly with a bag of frozen peas in her grasp. “Here. This should help with the pain a little, too.”

“You patch up many black eyes?” he teases, bending to let her press the bag gently over his eye. His body tenses at the pressure, teeth biting back a groan, and she murmurs soothingly under her breath, easing her touch until he feels only the cold. Her focus is fixed on his injury, and it leaves him free to admire the soft angles of her face, the beauty mark at the corner of her mouth, the freckles set like stars against her cheeks. A few curls threaten to spring loose from her braid, and his fingers itch to discover how soft they might feel in his hands. 

“Can’t say I do,” she answers finally, when the weight of his gaze makes her blush and look away. “But I was clumsy enough to get all sorts of injuries when I was little, and the frozen peas trick always works.” She checks her phone and mutters an adorably soft curse. “I have a final in half an hour, or I’d stay and—”

“I got it from here,” he reassures her, with a smile half-hidden by the hand keeping her makeshift compress in place. “But thanks for looking after me, Mercy. Honestly. With your help, it feels better already.”

She hesitates a moment longer, clearly torn, before she reaches up and strokes the smooth pad of her thumb over his cheek. “Take care of yourself, okay?” Her features are tight with concern, but she turns and hurries down the hall, the sound of her footsteps fading into a silence that weighs heavy on his shoulders.

iv. 

Mercy lets her fingers move mindlessly across the keys, coasting on a comfortable familiarity, the soft notes of a nocturne soothing out the stresses of her day. Her left hand sidles over broken chords, rising into an arpeggio that’s just about to reach its zenith when the power cuts in her apartment, plunging her into sudden darkness.

She blinks as her eyes struggle to adjust, groping blindly for her phone. The narrow beam of its flashlight guides her careful steps into the kitchen, where she rummages beneath the sink and emerges with a tin of tealight candles. 

It takes the whole container just to light her living room, but at least she can see her own feet. The faint flicker of candlelight is just enough to keep the darkness at bay, and it’s with a calmer heart that Mercy picks her way across the apartment to answer a hurried knock at her door.

Logan stands in the darkened hallway outside, the glow of his cell phone gripped between his fingers. “Hey, sorry, I know it’s late. I heard you playing, so I thought…”

“I was up,” she confirms, blushing as she pictures him in the apartment next door, listening to her practice. “Your power’s out too, I assume?”

“Pitch dark.” He spots the soft halos of light over her shoulder and heaves a sigh of recognition. “Candles. You’re a genius.”

She laughs. “It’s an old building, and definitely not the first time this has happened. I can spare a few, if you need some.”

Logan chuckles, and even through the darkness she can feel the warmth of his gaze on her. “Lucky me. Don’t worry about it, I’m sure it’ll pass soon enough. I feel better knowing you’re okay over here. Let me know if you need anything, okay?”

She’s not sure where she finds the courage. Maybe the darkness makes her bold, the sight of Logan turning back to leave clawing a sudden ache into her heart. “Wait!” 

He rocks back on his heels, and she can just make out the arch of surprise in his expression. 

“Maybe you could… stay? Until the power’s back? I hate the thought of you just sitting in the dark over there when you don’t have to.”

Logan takes a slow step closer, close enough to feel a trace of his body heat as he searches her face through the darkness. “Would you like that?” he asks softly. “If I stayed?”

She swallows, nodding even as her face burns with the force of her blush. “Very much.”

He smiles then, and with a gentle motion, lifts his hand to tuck an errant curl behind her ear. “Me too.”

It’s stranger than she thought it would be, having Logan in her apartment, even if she’s spent more and more of her time here thinking of him. They settle in the dim circle of candlelight that rings her living room, stretched out side by side across the floor. His leg shifts, bumping her foot with his own, and she breathes a laugh that shivers in the air between them. When she turns, she finds him watching her, his smile inches away as the light washes soft over his features. 

His dark eyes slowly roam her face, landing on the shape of her mouth with a look of immense purpose. He reaches out to trail rough fingertips along the frame of her jaw, his touch sending a shudder of warmth down her spine. He traces a thumb over her blushing cheekbone, her name a whisper on his breath before he leans in and softly kisses her.

Logan is almost unbearably tender, his lips gentle against her own as his fingers wind into the thick curls of her hair, drawing her into the circle of his arms. Past the rushing of her heartbeat, Mercy hears a faint groan at the back of his throat when she grips him by the shirt to tug him closer, parting her lips for the brief slide of his tongue. 

When they break reluctantly apart, he tilts his forehead against hers with a breathless laugh. “You don’t know how long I’ve been thinking about doing that.” 

She laughs with him, carefree, like her worries have all floated off and vanished somewhere in the dark. “Probably about as long as I have.”

His eyes flash with amusement, and a flicker of something else, an ardor close to hunger. “Then we’ve got some time to make up for.”

Mercy falls eagerly into his arms, where she feels his heartbeat racing in his chest, and he kisses her until the lights hum back to life around them — and then, even, a while longer. 

[diabloindigo]

Are you the person to open a box of cereal just to get the toy inside? As a kid yes. Right now, I don’t buy cereals with prizes anymore. Do they even stuff toys in cereal these days? 

Do you get scared easy? If it’s in the anxiety induced variety, yes. 

What was one of the stupidest things you cried over when you were little? Not sure, it could have been anything from not wanting to wear a fancy dress or dress shoes to a party or a broken toy. 

Have you ever drank milk from the carton? Despite having a working dishwasher and plenty of glasses, I “waterfall” milk and juice from the containers. 

Juice or milk? I go both ways, leaning more towards juice. Apple or orange. 

Do you ever turn off your computer properly? Once in a while. 

Do you wish you were a fish? Not really, though I kinda envy the blue Dory (Doctor Fish?) in the tank at my gynecologist’s waiting room. It likes to swim to the bottom of the tank and ride up to the top on a bubble jet. That damn fish has probably had more fun than I have in the past several months. 

Who’s your favorite super hero? Invincible (Amazon Prime). Along with Spider-Man (2002) and the Big Hero 6 movie, that character/series is a rare superhero show that makes me feel strong and vulnerable at the same time. 

Who’s your favorite super villain? Slade Wilson/ Deathstroke as seen in “Teen Titans: The Judas Contract” animated movie and the 2003-2006 “Teen Titans” cartoon series. 

Spiderman or X-men? Spider-Man. Tobey Maguire and Peter B. Parker from Into the Spiderverse. 

Movie theatre or stay at home movie night? Theaters. Alamo Drafthouse. I love ordering boozy milkshakes and finger foods.

Do you have a Blue Ray? I have one of those external drives for my Mac though I never use it. 

How about HD television? Yeah

Do you think HD television is kind of a waste of money? No. 

Do you get why people get so frickin’ freaked out during football season? I do not, and living in a state with a hard-on for (American) football makes it weird when I tell people that I do not have a favorite football team/player. 

Do you ever sneak scraps to the dog even though you’re not suppose to? I don’t sneak him food. If I cook or order too much to eat, then I scrape a couple of cup’s worth of leftovers in his bowl. He’s probably got only a year to live so let him live it up a little. 

Are you reading a book right now? If so what? A friend gave me a copy of “The Only Good Indians” but I can't get into it so I’m reading “Full Throttle” by Joe Hill. 

What was the last book you were required to read for school? It’s been so long I can’t remember. 

O donuts or jelly filled? Whipped cream filled. I love Krispy Kreme’s whipped cream filled donuts with raspberry filled donuts as a close second. 

If I’m feeling bland then I do like crullers. 

Do you like your ice-cream in a bowl or cone? Bowl unless it’s a tasty cone. 

Marshmallows in your hot chocolate or no? I could go either way unless it’s a tiny cup of chocolate. 

Do you like cherry coke? Hell yes. I love going to Sonic for a cherry-vanilla-lime Coke or this greasy little 1950s type burger joint for their cherry cokes since they load the cups with several cherries. 

Do you really think diet Dr. Pepper is the equivalent of a cupcake? No, it tastes artificial. Like a bastard child of a soft drink that wants to pass for cherry soda. 

Do you snore in your sleep? Drool? Talk? Snore and talk (I’m pretty stressed out).

Have you ever sleep walked? no

Are you a morning person? I am now. 

How do you wake up in the mornings? by alarm during the work week, naturally at 6-7 on vacation days. 

Do you think guyliner is hot? What is that? 

Is variety the spice of life? yeah

Do you think strawberry milk is disgusting? I like it. 

Have you ever drank after anyone? Like sharing a cup/bottle? Yeah, loads of times.  

Have you ever drank after anyone you don’t know very well? No. 

Do you have any limits on who you drink/eat after?

If we’re talking about sharing, then I will share food/drink with family and friends. If someone offers me bite-size pieces that are individually wrapped or can be torn off the main portion, I’ll eat it, but only from co-workers or acquaintances. 

Would you eat a sucker if someone already ate some of it? No. 

Would you chew somebody else's gum? Hell no. 

Do you know anyone who’s going to die of mono because of that? No. 

Do you enjoy school? My English and psychology classes. 

Are you a teacher’s pet? no

Do you have a job? Yes. 

How did you get to and from school? Parents drove me or I walked for elementary through high school. I drove when I went to college. 

Do you have a bedtime? And if so what is it? I’m in bed between 11-12 a.m.

What time do you get up? 6 am so I can walk/exercise before the sun boils the earth in full force. 

Have you ever pulled an all-nighter? Yeah in college. 

What’s more important? Beauty or brains? brains

Do you believe in yourself? Sometimes I do, and sometimes I don’t. 

Did you ever want to be an astronaut when you were little? No. Being a veterinarian or scientist were my highest ambitions as a small kid. 

How about the president? Never. 

What did you want to be when you were little? Veterinarian, scientist, cartoon character. 

Did you ever want to be a super model? no

Do you believe you’re attractive enough to be a super model? No.

Have you ever had an X-ray? Several in the past few months for pre-surgery and dental work.

What’s your favorite guy’s name? What’s your favorite girl’s name? Guys’: Shane, Mark, Tadashi, Austin, Cade, Trip.

Girls’: Quince, Sienna, Amy, Kit, Lizzie (Elizabeth), Raven.

Who’s your second cousin’s, grandparent’s, sister? The fuck...

Do you laugh to yourself whenever the ketchup bottle farts? No, in fact, I get annoyed when other people hear it and ask me if I farted. 

Do you have any real guns in your house? I have several. 

Do you know how to use nunchucks? No, I bought a pair at one of those Asian imports emporiums, but I donated them since I never learned to use them. They were these crappy foam padded ones with dragons printed on the handles. 

Do you know anyone who can use nunchucks? No. 

What do you want to be next Halloween? In better health and not shitting bricks about using up my paid time off to go to doctors’ appointments. 

Did you ever consider getting a job as a mall Santa? No. I’d rather be one of his elves or a reindeer. 

Are you the one responsible for taking out the garbage? Yes. Grosses me the fuck out sometimes with smelly discarded poultry trays or rotten food, but somebody’s gotta do it. 

Do you recycle? My city has the blue recycling bins, but I heard that since we’re an ass-backward community, “recyclables” and trash all go to the same place. I just place recyclables in the blue bin to help clear up space in the trash bin. Maybe I’m wrong and this city does recycle? Can’t hurt. 

When I was 11, I’d collect empty soda cans to take to the recycling guy since back in the day, they’d pay for aluminum cans. That’s how I scraped up funds for dollar movies and hot dogs. 

Are you a pyro? Yeah. I carry/collect Zippo lighters but mostly because the “click-click” is satisfying to hear since I flip the lids open and closed to relieve stress. And I burn a lot of old bills and letters with sensitive info on them. 

What was the last word/thing you wrote down? I was researching high fiber foods that are also low in carbs to make a grocery and dinner meal plan. 

Sleeping or eating? After my surgery, sleeping. 

Are you overall a positive person? I try to be realistically positive, if such a thing exists. The world will never be all sunshine and My Little Ponies, but I try to find some comfort and positivity when my world is a shit-show. Filling this survey out kinda helps. 

Do you hate hypocrites? Yeah, especially the “do as I say, not as I do” types. 

For instance, a certain family member is pushing good diet and health habits, but it aggravates the hell out of me if I see him drinking high sugar iced tea or eating ice cream. Or Door-Dashing Burger King, even if it is a Beyond Whopper with a diet Coke. 

Do you like to prank people? Yes, but I do benign pranks like leaving dirty riddles and meme drawings on their front doors. 

What was the worst prank you’ve ever done on anyone? I tried fucking with a telesolicitor but I could not stop laughing. 

Have you ever jumped on a trampoline in the ice? I don’t own a trampoline. 

Have you ever ice skated? No. I tried once after a local minor league hockey game. I got the skates on, but my ankles were bending/bowing out so I changed my mind.

Ever water skiid? No. 

Is vacuum spelled funny? Yes. 

Democrat or republican? I don’t associate formally with either party, but I hitch my pony a little to the left. 

Who’s the biggest asshole you know? My former boss circa 2013. Very unprofessional and a veritable loudmouth and a poor (shit) showman wannabe. 

Pen or pencil? Gel-ink pens. 

Should all paper have holes? nope

Speaking of holes. Swiss cheese, what’s the point of that? Fewer calories? Spinning slices in my hand like a TV cowboy spinning his revolver in the trigger guard with his finger? 

Have you ever been in a helicopter before? No. 

Own any airbrushed tshirts? Nope, not even in the nineties. 

Have you ever been suspended? No. 

Have you ever been in a fist fight? A few playground fights as a kid. 

Ever said something to someone that you didn’t mean to say? Yes. 

Do you forgive too easily? I don’t think so. 

What are you listening to right now? The AC running. 

Have you ever seen any of MCR’s music videos? Nope. 

Are you tan? No. 

Have you ever been in a tanning bed? No. I have no desire to look like a Cheeto or woo skin cancer. 

Have you ever played water volley? Once at my uncle’s neighborhood swimming pool. 

Ever had a sunburn? Yes, from neglecting sunscreen re-applications or underestimating the sun. 

How about wind burn? It hurts….. Nah, I don't live in a cold enough climate for that. 

What was the first word you learned how to say? I think it was “mama.”

[lyssismagical]

I'll be your optimistic black hole, full of love I can't control

Parkner Febufluff Day 13 & 14 – Bouquet of Roses & Valentine’s Day

Read on AO3

*

Back in Tennessee, Harley was used to being one of the smartest kids in town. Rose Hill was a small place filled with people who would end up going nowhere. Everyone in his class would end up taking after their parents, working as teachers of Rose Hill High or at the corner store or in the little pubs around town.

Harley, on the other hand, had Tony Stark on speed dial. He had a garage filled with Stark-approved technologies. He used to build pop can robots and potato guns using the junk he took from his mom’s work at one of the pubs. And then he started building real technologies using the things that Tony bought for him.

He was used to be being the smartest. He was happy being top of the ranks, the one voted for The Person To Go The Farthest at the award ceremonies. He had never been anywhere but comfortably a genius compared to the other kids at his skills.

And then he arrived to Midtown High, in the middle of junior year.

He went from being the smartest kid in Rose Hill, to being the stupidest kid in Midtown.

He was supposed to be Stark’s kid, the smart kid, the one everyone went to for homework help. It shouldn’t be hard for him to pass his classes.

But fuck was he ever wrong.

His grades were slipping through his fingers, his nights were spent crying out of frustration at his desk when he just didn’t get it. He couldn’t understand the numbers and words floating around his pages.

And exams were rolling around soon. Only a couple weeks until then and if Harley fails his exams, he’ll fail his classes, he’ll fail the semester. He’ll end up back in Rose Hill, back to pretending to be the smartest kid like he isn’t struggling to understand everything.

He was going to fail.

* He’s half-asleep in English class, somehow the only class he’s passing decently, when somebody sits in the vacant seat beside him, the seat that’s been empty for the past two months that he’s been in New York.

He didn’t have any friends, but he knew the boy beside him.

Peter Parker was the kid that got pushed into lockers, punched behind the school, lunch money stolen, teased and tripped and tortured by Flash and his group of dumbasses.

Peter was also well-known as the smartest kid in school, acing all his classes despite his less-than-perfect attendance record. He wore thick glasses and button-ups under his sweaters, wide bambi-brown eyes filled with a sort of childish innocence.

“Hi,” Harley says dumbly, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. Normally, Peter sits front and center just like he does in all the classes they share.

Peter smiles brightly, eyes crinkling behind his glasses. “Hi. I’m Peter. Peter Parker.”

“Harley. No offense, of course, but why are talking to me?”

“Yeah, I, uh, I don’t wanna overstep or anything, but I heard from my not-quite-friend that you were having some trouble in Chem and I was wondering if you wanted any help?”

It’s said with such ease, such carelessness, like it isn’t the thing that Harley’s been beating himself up over for months. Like this hasn’t caused tears, hiding his tests with failing grades from Tony and hoping to god he can make those marks back later.

“The exam’s coming up,” Peter continues, blushing under Harley’s gaze and averting his eyes to the floor. “And I don’t wanna be that guy but I’m a tutor for the school, so if you needed some help, I just wanted to let you know I’m always available.”

Tears fill his eyes as the embarrassment, the shame, burns his chest, hands shaking under the desk.

He’s supposed to be smart. He’s supposed to be able to understand this stuff without a fucking tutor.

But he can’t do it.

He feels so fucking stupid all the time, going from The Genius of Rose Hill all the way down to The Stupid Kid Who Needs a Tutor at Midtown.

“Just let me know, yeah? I’m always around.” Peter moves to stand up, offering another timid smile.

Just as he’s about to turn away, to leave Harley who’s barely said a word, Harley grabs his wrist. He’s weak. He’s so fucking weak, but he needs this. He needs help. He needs to get his head above water before he fails his exams.

“I, uh, I kinda need a tutor, yeah,” Harley says, shoving down the burning shame.

Peter’s quick to sit back down, a gentle smile gracing his features. “Yeah, of course, I’m happy to help.”

“I’m failing my classes,” Harley admits because he’s been holding that secret in his chest for two of the longest months in his life. “Almost all of them. I just- I can’t fail my exams too. I just- I don’t get it. I feel so fucking stupid.”

Somehow, someway, there’s no disgust in Peter’s expression, no confusion, no hatred, no judgement. Just the same bright kindness that he manages to constantly radiate.

“That’s okay, everyone gets a little in over the head sometimes. You’re smart, Harley, I’m in your Tech class, I would know,” Peter says, smile never fading. “Just because you’re having trouble with memorizing the concepts or getting a hang of the ideas, doesn’t mean you’re stupid.”

It’s such a simple, casual thing for Peter to say, but it loosens something in Harley’s chest, makes the insecurities quiet just a little bit.

“So you’ll help me?” Harley asks quietly.

And Peter smiles, bright and incomparably. “Course I will, Harley.”

* There are only three weeks left until his exams, so Peter decides to devote all of his free time to Harley like he has nothing better to do.

It starts with just a few lunches and a couple after-school tutor sessions at the school’s library, but by the second week, Peter’s decided he wants Harley to absolutely ace his tests, so they start spending every lunch and afternoon together, pouring over Harley’s textbooks.

And on Friday of the second week, Peter invites Harley back to his place for a few extra hours of studying.

Peter’s a genius. He knows everything, it feels like. Harley believes Peter’s IQ could even rival Tony’s, though he’d never admit that to his mentor.

He lives in an old, small apartment in Queens with his aunt, a wonderful woman and Harley immediately understands where Peter got his unconditional kindness.

May left for work while they were studying on Friday and they lose track of time.

(Harley gets caught up in the way Peter laughs and smiles, so open and bright, and the way he teaches, devoted and thorough, and the way he’s so wonderful with every question Harley has, every complaint about he feels stupid not getting their classwork.)

And eventually, they realize it’s gotten pretty late and Harley has a dozen or so missed calls from Tony.

“Oh shit, I should probably-” Harley says, preparing to stand and leave, despite wanting to stay.

“If you’re allowed to, you can stay the night,” Peter offers shyly, a soft blush filling his cheeks. “We can study for a little longer, I think we have some leftover takeout.”

Harley can’t help the smile that stretches over his face, ignoring the warmth that soothes all of his worries.

“Lemme call Tony and ask.”

* Tony said yes, along with a lot of teasing about staying the night with another boy, but after that Friday night, they hang out for most of the day on Saturday, and again on Sunday.

Though, they spend Sunday watching movies and hanging out as friends more than they really get any homework done. Peter claims that Star Wars is educational too, and it’ll help Harley with his classwork, but Harley knows better.

The next week, the two boys are practically inseparable.  

Peter claims he’s only sitting beside Harley in all his classes to help him with the work, and Harley says he only walks Peter from class to class to protect him from Flash because he needs to make sure his tutor is in perfect shape for exams.

They hang out at the library or Peter’s apartment after school every day, and they spend lunches together, and the weekend before exams, Peter comes to the tower and they spend all three days cooped up in Harley’s room (which he actually cleaned before Peter came over) to make sure Harley was absolutely prepared for his exams.

Even Tony gives them space, which is crazy considering it’s Tony. But all he does is knock on their door every few hours, offering snacks or meals or asking if they need any help. Otherwise, he doesn’t bother them.

* And then, before Harley knows it, exams are over.

He did it and he did them with confidence.

They get their grades back the second week of February, but Harley doesn’t care anymore because Peter’s back to sitting in the front of the classrooms, back to just offering polite smiles when they see each other in the hallways, back to not hanging out with Harley.

He doesn’t know what he expected, but he didn’t think Peter would go back to not talking to Harley. He didn’t think Peter would just leave him as soon as Harley stopped needing him.

But it’s fine.

Harley doesn’t care.

Or at least that’s what he tells himself when he watches Peter sit across the room with his stupid, beautiful smile and messy curls and adorable skip in his step.

He doesn’t care.

* Grade Average of Eighty-Eight Percent.

Holy fucking shit.

The report card is shaking in his grip, page crinkling in his sweaty hands.

Peter managed to get his grades up from failing, up to high 80s. How? Harley doesn’t know, but the numbers stare back up at him from the page, real and right in front of him.

“You should get your study-buddy a gift,” Tony says.

He found out about Harley’s grades when he found his progress report hidden under the couch a few days prior. He wasn’t happy, not that Harley was failing, but because Harley didn’t feel like he could go to Tony for help.

After a long discussion about intelligence and about asking for help and about how Tony will be proud of him for whatever grades he gets as long as he’s trying his best, things went back to normal.

“He isn’t talking to me anymore,” Harley admits quietly.

Tony lets out a little laugh, quickly stifling it when he sees Harley’s sour expression. “Just talk to him. I saw the way he looked at you, kiddo. From what you’ve told me, he probably just doesn’t know how to be your friend.”

“So… what? What am I supposed to do?”

Tony shrugs, leaning back against the counter and offering a smile. It makes Harley miss Peter’s smiles. “It’s Valentine’s Day tomorrow, kid. Get him some flowers or something, let him know you did well on your Exams and then ask to hang out sometime. Stop overthinking this.”

“And what if he says no?”

“Then he’s missing out. And you can play it off as just wanting to say thank you, nothing more. No harm done.”

That’s how Harley ends up walking down the hall with faux-confidence, bouquet of roses clutched in one hand, his report card in the other.

Peter’s at his locker, a heavy book in his hands. He looks pretty, like he always does, cheeks flushed a light pink, bambi-brown eyes scanning the pages, a soft smile gracing his face.

“Peter!” Harley calls out.

The boy looks up, pushing his book into his locker to focus his whole attention on Harley. He’s already grinning, eyes light and sparkling.

“Harley,” Peter greets, smile unfaltering, even as he takes in the roses.

“I wanted to get you a thank you gift for helping me out this past month,” Harley says, his mouth is suddenly dry and his heart is pounding in his chest. “Guess who has an eighty-eight average?”

Peter’s jaw drops and his eyes got wide, and then his arms are around Harley’s neck, face against his shoulder.

“Holy shit, that’s incredible!”

Harley’s quick to catch the younger boy, sliding his arm around Peter’s waist, careful not to disturb the flowers.

Peter pulls away, just enough to look up at Harley, face beaming with pride. “I knew you could do it. I told you, you were smart, didn’t I?”

With Peter’s face just inches from Harley’s, beautiful and bright with that wonderful kindness, arms already around Harley, nobody can really blame him for crossing the few inches of distance and pressing their lips together.

Another wonderful turn of events, and Peter’s kissing him back, arms tightening around Harley’s shoulders, drawing them closer together.

When they’re eventually pulling away, Peter smiling shyly, blushing and obviously flustered.

“I, uh, I-” Peter stutters, eyes wide. But he looks happy.

“You wanna go out sometime?” Harley asks. “Not school-related.”

Peter’s face lights up in another one of his beautiful smile. “I’d love to.”

Peter kisses his again, leaning up on his toes to reach Harley’s mouth.

“Happy Valentine’s Day, Peter.”

“You too, Harley.”

[doctorgerth]

Matchup for @mysticaltigersorceress​

Thank you so much Coop! ♥️♥️ Can I ask for a Romantic (sfw) matchup? I’m 21, asexual with a Male romantic pref. I have medium length Auburn hair, hazel eyes, and lotsta freckles! Average female height and athletic with lotsa leg strength. And when I say athletic, I’m working out 4-6 days a week for minimum of 2hrs on average. I love to learn new skills, jack-of-all-trades. I love teaching even more. I tend to be reserved in unfamiliar situations, but mom instinct can override my anxiety. Once I’m over my anxiety, I’m a huge tease, sassy and sarcastic (to the point people think I’m flirting when I’m not). I don’t mind going out every now and again, but prefer staying at home most of the time. Very caring and altruistic. I can read people very well. Exception is that I don’t usually expect people to like me romantically or anything like that, so it takes me by surprise when it happens and I become an anxious disaster. I have apathetic/depressive slums when my schedule is thrown off/I have nothing to do (rip covid19) and hyperactive episodes that hit when/wherever. When I’m upset (angry, sad, etc) I get nonverbal and just need to take space for awhile until I feel calm again. I also talk without thinking about how it’s actually coming out which has lead to some hilarious and awkward situations. INFP (with extroverted tendencies) virgo, yr of tiger. *mwah* thank you again babe!

Sure thing sweetheart, thanks so much for requesting!! 💕 Hope you like your matches *muah*

Your match is…

Zoro (Scorpio, ISTP)

Of course it’s the athleticism that started his attraction for you, he couldn’t help it! Zoro takes training and maintaining his body, strength, and health very seriously, so it’s always nice to meet someone with the same drive. You’re so very intriguing in general, and very few things catch Zoro’s eye, but you wow him almost every single day. You’re so eager and quick to learn new things, whether that’s him introducing you to something or anyone else, you always have this determination to understand or master something challenging and it’s your persistence that constantly impresses him. Having you to teach him new things is always fun to him but it’s also enough for him to watch you try to figure something out yourself! 

Zoro definitely shares a more reserved nature with you and very much likes his alone time. Since the two of you have plenty of adventures as pirates, you much prefer to spend quality time together in a peaceful environment when the time allows. You two are total introverts and thrive off of that much needed alone time. Re-energizing in your alone time is no problem, you two are never offended if one or the other asks for some privacy because you both completely understand and relate to one another in that aspect. Zoro has more extroverted tendencies when out in public, but he doesn’t like to waste time with meaningless conversations. If the situation calls for it, he will be outspoken and will encourage you to do the same. He’s seen your protective, strong-willed side shine on more than a few occasions, so he’s always a bit baffled to see you acting anxious in new situations. He’s not the best at verbal encouragement, so you’ll probably get a shoulder bump or maybe even a hand squeeze to calm you down. It’s taken him some time to learn how to ease your anxiety, but he’s determined to get it right! He always tries his best and that’s what matters most. When your mom instinct kicks in, he can’t help but be proud at how much of a force of nature you can be. Your teasing, sassy, and sarcastic attitude is a major source of enjoyment for him, especially when you pop off at a certain blonde-haired cook, or any enemy for that matter. You’re sweet and caring with a hidden diva within you and Zoro is very much into that. He’ll tease you right back and Zoro is quite skilled at sarcasm. When you get sassy with him, even if you’re being spiteful, he can’t help but be attracted to it. 

Zoro both loves and hates how well you can read him. This is beneficial for when he doesn’t want to talk about his feelings (aka most of the time) but it can also be bothersome to him in other ways. You know him too well and that can be a bit frustrating as he’s worried you always find him predictable and/or boring. He appreciates that you always know when he’s upset and how to cheer him up, but oddly enough, he finds himself wishing he was a bit more unpredictable and harder to read. After all, knowing him so well means he has to be completely vulnerable with you and that honestly terrifies him. You can always tell when Zoro is upset about something, and much like you, he gets nonverbal and needs some space to sort things out. This simplifies most of your arguments as you two both share similar coping mechanisms, but more often than not, you two find yourselves trying to battle your emotions alone. You two both need to work on being more communicative when you are upset about something! 

He is well aware of how much schedule changes can bother you, so he tries his hardest to not disrupt your plans while also taking you out for adventure when he’s noticing you slipping into your slums. He finds your hyperactive episodes and random outbursts very charming as they remind him so much of his goofy captain whom he loves and respects deeply. He might not ever express excitement as well as you, but just know that he adores how cheerful and silly you can be and he will do anything to keep that warm smile on your face!! 

Other potential suitors:

Ace (Capricorn, ESTP) - Ace thinks you’re the coolest what with your multi-talents and eagerness to learn new things. You two are very similar in that sense, constantly challenging each other with random stimulating activities! Your care for your body and health is also very attractive to him and he is always down to work out and train with you. Your teasing and sassy attitude is very fun to him and he will mess with you just to rile you up sometimes! Ace is very much extroverted so he will consistently push you out of your shell and kick your anxiety in the ass. He thinks you’re wonderful and he’s seen your extroversion tendencies shine and he just wants everyone to bask in the sunshine that is you! I feel like you and Ace have very similar personalities in that you both get bummed out when you have nothing to do but thankfully you two share similar interests and know how to keep each other occupied to avoid the depression.

Coby (Taurus, ISFJ) - Coby also thinks you’re super neat and loves to learn new things from you. He totally understands your anxiety, but the longer he’s been in the Marines, the more outspoken and confident he becomes! This helps him to both relate to you and give you that push to overcome your anxiety! But, when it comes down to it, Coby is also very much introverted and does enjoy some relaxing time one-on-one with you. When your protective mom tendencies spill forth, he can’t help but fall in love with you all over again. Coby hardly needs protection but the way you look after him regardless is so heartwarming to him! Your teasing and sarcastic attitude tends to throw him off at the beginning of your relationship, just because he’s constantly worried about messing up, but the longer he’s with you the more he picks up your habits! Coby is pretty sassy and sarcastic now and can match your wit. He finds your hyperactivity and randomness very endearing as well!

Luffy (Taurus, ESFP) - Awww, two asexual babies! You and Luffy are very very similar despite your introversion/extroversion differences. Luffy hates being stuck in one place for a long amount of time, so he’s constantly seeking adventure with you to keep life exciting for the both of you! You’ll never fall into a depressive slum as long as you have this sweet sunshine boy. He struggles a bit with your social anxiety because he is quite possibly the most extroverted person on the planet, so he usually just throws you into social situations without second thoughts. However, he can kinda pick up on the uneasy vibes from you so he’ll stick close to ya to make sure you feel safe and comfortable! You two also have very hyperactive and random outburst moments that can be both adorable and maybe a lil annoying to those around you. But hey, you’re just two goofs in love who know how to enjoy each other’s company and enjoy life! 

[skellies-n-their-human]

more bio shit (i’ll edit this to look more presentable when i have access to a computer, tumblr mobile really sucks :< i apologize if it’s hard to read for the time being)

Sans owns the house that everyone lives in. He’s pretty laidback and lenient about lots of things, so it takes a lot to get him angry. But when he does, he gets pretty fuckin’ scary. In fact, everyone is or has been scared by Sans at one point (which is kinda funny, considering Sans’ biggest fetish is fear). Thankfully he’s only gotten super angry twice. No one likes to talk about it.

Sans is also a space geek — more than a few times has he been caught reading a thick astronomy book “hidden” inside of a little paperback full of jokes and wordplay. If you have a question about the universe, he’ll most likely have an answer at the ready. Suffers from hypersomnia, so he sleeps a lot.

Papyrus is a pure SOUL, and everyone can’t help but love him. He’s super sweet and loves to help everyone out! Unsurprisingly, he’s very good with kids. He’s often given the nick Creampuff and he’s come to not only accept it at this point, but to embrace it. YES he is a creampuff, soft and fluffy with yummy filling inside! What of it?! He’s so full of energy, and would absolutely beat you in a game of DDR.

He is nonbinary, going primarily by he/him pronouns, but any pronouns are perfectly okay with him! Papyrus is also gray-ace, preferring to keep away from any sexual stuff, but is not outright repulsed by it.

At first glance, Red would seem to be your stereotypical “macho man.” He’s big and burly, drinks and smokes, he’s loud and rude — basically a skeletal frat boy. But what most people don’t see from him is his softer side; he’s such a romantic, he will go out of his way to plan the perfect date night for he and his partner/s. He loves to spoil, and will do exactly that. He’ll give little inexpensive gifts every now and then, like your favorite candy he picked up while buying some cigarettes, or maybe a pair of shoes you’ve been looking at during your online window-shopping. He’s better at showing his love through actions than through words, and he tends to stutter when he shows any sort of strong emotion, like anger or nervousness. Despite this, he’s not one to sugarcoat his opinions. Has an affinity for cars and casually watch NASCAR (he’s not a huge fan or anything).

Boss... oof. Boss is Red’s younger brother. He and Red grew up in a very hostile environment. I won’t go into it much on this post, but Red took raised him from a babybones, but once Boss reached adolescence Red fell into a deep, heavy depression and the roles were reversed. He’s strict and a little mean at times, but he’s only doing what he was taught in order to protect himself and others. That being said, his displays of affection start out very rare, as showing affection was considered a sign of weakness. Eventually he’ll open up to hugs, kisses, cuddles, and even *gasp* PDA, but it will take some time before he gets to that point. He has a high LV, the highest of all the skeletons, and it affects him greatly. When Boss feels any sort of strong negative emotion, he’s at risk of his LV taking over his mind and body, putting not only himself but those around him in danger. There’s a special protocol in place to calm him down whenever this occurs.

On a brighter note, he loves to cook and is very good at it. He keeps a small booklet of everyones favorite recipes! His dream is to open a five-star restaurant.

Stretch loves sweets, adores companionship, and taking everything slow and steady. He’s never in a rush, the chill stoner he is. Most of the time you can find him lounging on a sofa or armchair playing cheap games on his phone. He’s the kind of guy who would spend hours browsing a Spencer’s, staying towards the back and giggling at the silly sex toys. Stretch is extremely interested in the concept of body piercing, and though he’d never get any piercings himself, he’d love to become a professional body piercer one day.

He lives off of touch, both giving and receiving; hugs whenever he’s greeting someone, a bit of hand holding while walking together, little head pats or shoulder touching when he’s standing next to you. His primary love language is touch, and it becomes apparent very quickly. He also had an oral fixation, and will usually be seen with a cigarette, a joint, or a lollipop between his teeth.

Blue, it almost seems, is going through a permanent sugar rush. In fact, he’s not really allowed to indulge in sweets because of how even *more* hyperactive they make him. That’s okay though, he’s more into salty and savory foods. He has a habit of working himself to exhaustion, sometimes even having to be nursed back to health by Stretch or Papyrus.

Blue’s a little -shit- /troublemaker/, using those big, bright eyes of his to play innocent, easily deceiving anyone and everyone (unless you’re used to his tactics, then he just gets frustrated). He’s a social butterfly and absolutely hates being alone for long periods of time. He doesn’t do well under pressure and as a result, isn’t good at lying or keeping secrets. He loves sports, but most of the time he’ll just go for a quick run with a buddy.

Slim is a gentle giant, easily towering over all of the other skeletons yet wouldn’t hurt a fly. He’s selectively mute, speaking only once in a blue moon. In fact, if it wasn’t for his extreme height, one would almost forget he existed. He’s been through a lot back home, developing severe general anxiety disorder and perhaps showing signs of C-PTSD? No one but Razz can say for sure, and Razz isn’t going to tell anyone anytime soon. Slim’s jacket is his security blanket, and he rarely takes his hood off, even home. The only times his entire skull is seen is straight out of the shower, or in the morning after he stumbles out of bed. Even during heatwaves, he has to be coaxed into taking it off.

Despite being so withdrawn, Slim craves companionship and tries to join in on group activities to the best of his ability. Like Stretch, he’s very touch-hungry and will help himself to cuddles. He’s pretty primal and dog-like, and uses petplay as a coping tool. He kiiinda has a problem with drooling, apparently it’s happened ever since his fangs got -pulled- knocked out. Even his new gold replacements don’t seem to help any. He doesn’t let it bother him, he just wipes his mouth on his sleeve and moves on. Most skeleton monsters have the ability to purr, and his is the loudest.

Whereas Slim is the tallest, his brother is the shortest of the group. Razz often wears heels to compensate for this, so most of the time he appears just about the same height as Blue (or taller, depending on the pair of shoes he’s wearing), even if he’s three or four inches shorter. He doesn’t let his lack of height get in the way, as he still has the the courage to boss everyone around. He’s very hard to please and can even be pretty argumentative about the littlest things. Despite this, he tries not to push people past their limits and he looks out for those closest to him, even if he has questionable ways of showing his love.

Razz keeps his interests to himself most of the time, so not too much is known about him when compared to the others. What we /do/ know is that he’s interested in fashion, sometimes sketching out a few designs even if he’ll never have the ability to create them — at least, not yet. Maybe someday he’ll pick up tailoring and fashion design as a full-time hobby. The closest he’s ever come to that was designing and creating the collar Slim constantly wears around his neck.

[quiescentcastiel]

*AC/DC screech* BACK IN CRACK!!! (ok that sounded better in my head. also it’s actually fairly canon-ish) (side note: suck it metatron)

Round 5 of @mittensmorgul‘s Great Fic Writer Scavenger Hunt pairs the tropes “Birds of a Feather“ and “Dean Winchester Blames Himself For Everything Ever“

Dean reached out to Cas who was standing, hunched shoulders shaking, in the middle of the bunker’s kitchen.

“We can get through this,” he said, “It’s not like you haven’t been human before, right?”

“But this is it now.” Cas’ voice was rough but barely above a whisper. “I’m human now, until I die.”

“Cas…” Dean gently turned Cas around to face him, but the angel couldn’t meet his eye. Sighing, Dean instead acted upon what he couldn’t put into words and enfolded Cas in his arms. Cas’ trembling became more pronounced, and his sobs echoed throughout the kitchen.

In the days following, both Sam and Dean did their best to acclimatize Cas to being human again and make him feel comfortable. Neither Cas nor Dean spoke about what’d happened that day.

A week had passed by since Cas turned human, and he still couldn’t seem to figure out how to work the bunker’s coffee maker. When he went to see if Dean would give him a hand, Cas found him in his bedroom, laying on his bed with his headphones on. He didn’t open his eyes, even when Cas called his name a couple times.

Cas walked over to Dean and gently laid his hand on Dean’s shoulder. In an instant, Dean’s eyes flashed open, and he had Cas’ wrist in a tight grip. But as he realized who it was, Dean relaxed and pushed his headphones down to rest on his neck.

“I’m sorry, Dean. I didn’t mean to startle you.”

“Naw, it was my bad,” said Dean, sitting up and shifting over to the edge of the bed. “I should know better than to listen to music loud enough that I can’t hear who’s sneaking up on me.”

“What were you listening to?” Cas asked, now unsure if coffee was a good enough excuse to bother Dean.

“Yes.”

“Yes what?”

“No, just Yes.”

“Who?”

“No, not the Who, Yes,” Dean insisted. He looked up at Cas who wore a mask of consternation, and his face split into a wide grin. “I’m sorry, buddy. It’s not fair of me to play Who’s On First with a man who doesn’t even know what’s going on.”

Cas realized that Dean had just been messing with him, and he sighed. “There’s so much I don’t know... so many human customs and such. I just-”

“It’s ok, Cas. Here, I’ll teach you.” He patted the bed next to him. “Your first lesson’ll be on good music.”

Cas sat next to Dean, not close enough that they were touching but enough that the air between them seemed to tingle. Dean placed the headphones over Cas’ ears.

“The band’s name is Yes. Here, lemme start the song from the beginning.”

They fell into a sort of routine of daily ‘lessons’, as Dean jokingly called them. He played Cas his music, made him read various books, and showed him all sorts of movies. Hell, Dean even took him shopping to get a new wardrobe filled with flannel and second-hand jeans.

Cas hung out with Sam too, but they found that they didn’t have quite as much in common. Cas groaned and complained the few times that Sam had tried to wake him up for a morning run, and Sam could only grimace at Cas’ unhealthy taste in food.

There was one thing neither Sam or Dean had quite touched though, and that was hunting. The brothers had hit a few small cases without him, always hurried along by Dean who didn’t like leaving Cas alone in the bunker too long, despite Sam arguing that some space would do him good. Cas had never asked to come along, though he’d been perfectly willing to let Dean teach him how to shoot and tell him all the ways to kill ghosts.

A couple months after Cas turned human, Sam found a case in a small town a couple of states over.

He explained to Dean; “Some guy took a nosedive into a port-a-potty, died, then a couple hours later was reported robbing a dispensary the next town over.”

Dean’s ‘disgusted’ face was growing stronger and stronger.

“Sounds like a shape-shifter,” said Cas who had just walked into the room.

“That’d...” Sam looked up, surprised, “that’d be my guess.”

Dean, still thinking about dying in a port-a-potty, gave a little shudder and turned to Cas.

“Hey... you wanna come along?” he asked. It was sudden and un-thought-through, and they all knew it.

“I... I don’t know if I’m ready.”

“Sure you are,” said Dean. “Anyways, hunting’s always a good way to get back on your feet.”

Sam’s voice was less confident. “Shifters are usually a pretty small case, I suppose.”

Cas gave them a tentative smile. “Alright.”

Much to Sam’s chagrin, Cas and Dean sang along to Dean’s rock tapes all the way to the case. After they’d arrived, they checked into a motel late at night and all immediately crashed.

Sam was the first one to wake up the next morning, but he was loud enough getting up that he woke everyone else up too. Once dressed and in their fed suits, they all stopped into a small diner for some breakfast. Both Cas and Dean ordered a cheeseburger, while Sam got a fruit smoothie.

“Guys,” Sam complained, “burgers aren’t a breakfast food!”

Dean rolled his eyes, and Cas said, “As far as I’ve learned, anything can be a breakfast food.”

“Yeah, if you want to die at 40.”

Cas frowned. “Anyways, if you’ll excuse me, you two were taking too long in the bathroom this morning, and I needed to use it.” He got up from the diner booth and walked off.

After watching Cas step into the bathroom, Sam immediately turned to Dean.

“Don’t you think it’s strange how much Cas is like you now that he’s human?”

Dean scoffed. “He’s not like me! I mean, maybe we have some same interests, but that’s because what I like is cool.”

Sam rolled his eyes.

“Hey,” said Dean, “just because you’re jealous that he’s not into your healthy green crap doesn’t mean this is about me.”

“He’s exactly like you!” Sam exclaimed.

“We’ve been hanging out; he’s probably just picking up on some of my habits.”

“He’s practically imitating you.”

Dean looked meaningfully over Sam’s shoulder to signal to him Cas’ return, but whispered fiercely at the last minute; “No he’s not!”

Cas slid into the booth next to Dean, and Sam smiled innocently at him. “So Cas, you’ve been human a little while now; you’ve experienced some human things.” Sam waited for Cas’ nod, flicked Dean a condescending look, then continues with, “so what’s your favorite song?”

Cas, appearing completely ignorant of what’s going on between the brothers, considered for a moment before replying. “It’s a tie between Zep’s Ramble On and Traveling Riverside Blues.”

The smile on Sam’s face widens. “Favorite food?” he asked.

“Pie!” Cas answered immediately.

Dean frowned. He could see he was loosing this argument, so he decided to ask his own questions. “Favorite kinda car?”

“The Impala, of course!”

“Well,” that was a dumb question, “obviously! How about you’re favorite color?”

Cas tilted his head a little. “I kinda like pink.”

“See!” Dean jumped on this. “He’s nothing like me.”

Sam raised an eyebrow and said nothing more than, “Uh-huh.”

“Dean?” asked Cas. Fortunately, the waitress interrupted Cas with their orders, and nothing more was said.

Sam was right; the case was a small one. Shapeshifters could sometimes be tricky, but this one was stupid enough that the boys were able to track it to an old warehouse pretty quickly. They all split up in hopes of being able to ferret out what was currently an 80 year old man.

But after looking around for a couple minutes, none of them could find any sign of the shifter. Sam, Dean, and Cas all met back up in the middle of the warehouse.

“Did you see him?”

“No.”

“You, Cas?”

“Not a sign.”

“Dean! Sam!” Cas yelled, limping around a stack of boxes.

Immediately, Sam and Dean drew their weapons and stepped back from the first Cas.

“Oh, Cas,” Dean groaned. “I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t’ve made everyone split up; I just figured that this shifter wasn’t quick enough to pull this. Hell, if I hadn’t made you come along with us you wouldn’t be in this mess. It’s all my fault.”

He looked up at the first Cas who said, “Dean... It’s all good.”

He looked over at the second Cas who said, “It’s not your fault, Dean. It’s mine.”

Dean whirled around and shot the first Cas.

“Dean?!” protested Sam.

Cas, the real one, said in a small voice, “How did you know?”

“Cas, you’re just like me; You blame yourself for everything.”

After they got back home, Dean went to talk to Cas. He found him sitting at the table in the kitchen, looking tired.

“Here we are again,” Dean said, the first reference to that night that either of them had made. Cas looked up, a small smile on his face. Dean sat down opposite him. “I should’ve been more careful with your life. You’re human now, and I could’ve been wrong.”

“You were right though; I am too much like you. I just thought that, being human now, if I was more like you, I wouldn’t be such a burden.”

“Cas...” Dean sighed. “You know I care about you no matter who you are.”

“It’s just the last time I ended up here in the kitchen I just felt so different, so out of place. I thought if I was more like you, you wouldn’t want me to be an angel again. I lost my grace because of how much I love you, and I’m not turning back.”

Dean spoke quietly, “Of course I love you too, Cas, no matter what. But I don’t understand, are you saying it’s my fault you lost your grace?”

Cas’ eyes widened. “It’s not your fault, Dean. I did it for you. I made my choice; I want to be human so that I can be with you, so I don’t have to watch you grow old without me.”

Dean smiled and took Cas’ hand in his. They were very much alike.

“You weren’t lying about pie being your favorite food though, right?” Dean asked. Cas just laughed and shook his head.