#i just want to go home and ignore all the change happening but i cant go there because it no longer exists

[villageoracle]

i went to the barbie movie and all i got was a deep feeling of existential dread

[leisureflame]

"I CANT THINK"

If you write, I assure you you have thought that.

Fear no more child, for I have found a solution.

it's called Rapid writing

something we learned when I was in 9th grade drama class and I cannot emphasize enough just how effective it is. Its actually what gave me the idea for my first book.

Stop what you are doing and do what I tell you

go grab either a pencil and paper (or open an empty document)

set a timer for 2 minutes

ask a friend to give you a random sentence. I have a few examples that I myself rapid wrote to: a) I looked around and saw b) the old lady hung from the ceiling and laughed c) purple paint dripped from her long purple fingernails d) there is a hole in my ceiling. e) when I am sad I... f) When you close the door, I... g) there is a wooden door with a gold doorknob

Now the most important thing is not to think of this sentence before you start writing. as soon as you decide which one if you are choosing from my examples (or as soon as you hear it if you are getting if from a friend), start the timer.

start writing the sentence and without hesitating just keep writing. the #1 rule here is to not stop or hesitate for a single second until the 2 minutes are over. you can write nonsense if you want and if you REALLY can't continue then write some random words for a couple of seconds then continue AS LONG AS YOU ARE STILL WRITING.

another rule is that you are not allowed to delete. even if its a spelling error, just ignore it.

after the timer is done, I promise you will have something to work with. now copy the paragraph you wrote and paste it below, here you can start fixing spelling errors and adding things at your own pace because now the creative side of your brain has opened.

don't think about the way you are writing or the words you use, think about the story you are telling. the idea.

Sometimes you will get something beautiful and deep like I did here:

When I am sad I go to my blanket, not many people know about it, all they think is happening is that a child likes to cuddle in a blanket, but no. my blanket has a special thing about it, it is a magical blanket, well, not the blanket itself but the embroidery on the blanket, it simply takes my sadness away but it adds the story of my emotions to the embroidery, my blanket is a very pretty one, it is a pastel blue color and it has so much silk embroideries that you just think its patterns, but it isn't, if you look deeper you will find stories every one of those stories came from someones tears... my tears. whenever i cry, i wipe my tears with my blanket and my pain goes but my story stays.

or

there is a wooden door with a gold doorknob on the door there is a painting of you, and there are many locks on the door from top to bottom, when you open the door, there is a mirror. this door is the door to self discovery, from the outside there is a painting of how people think you look like but when you open the door, you get to see what you really are in detail and look at yourself they way you want to, you can smile or cry and the refection on the mirror will change but on the painting, it doesn't show ur emotions, just how people see you usually.

or you can get something so stupid like i did here:

there is a hole in the ceiling in my classroom. everyday a dinosaur would a pear and eat my lunch and i keep coming home hungry but my mom dsays she packed me enough food. so she didn't feed me. i told her a dinasour was eating my lunch but she said that disasours only live in Norway! so i went into the school vents looking for that idino and revenge my food, we met at last, held our weapons, i was holding a subway sandwich and the dino was holding a bana na MY BANANA  i lost it, so i attacked him one hit on the head and the whole species were extinct , people thousand of years from now said dinos got extinct because of a meteorite but i know better, also i am still alive because whoever kills a dino becomes immortal, also i killed my mom for not believing me and let her starve in her grave just like she let made me starve. and then i killed everyone who was a flat earther because i hate them and now i can kill anyone once i tap them with my super subway sandwich 

(by the way, ignore the horrible spelling, the examples i gave were from the unedited version.)

THE POINT IS ITS ACTUALLY SO HELPFUL. you can use it for a new story idea (i used the blanket one as an element in one of my WIPs and it helped the story a lot) or if you get something stupid like the dino one I wrote THATS GOOD THATS FINE because now you have your creativity going.

I challenge you to actually try this and PLEASE share it with me I LOVE reading other peoples rapid writings. have fun <3

tagging @cosmosandcapybaras24 @ajsbookshelf @gloryofdawn, @chaoticharmony93 @deception-united and anyone else who's interested to try this out and share with me!

[lixielovess]

"and i still dont care, i only care about you and how you feel. if it meant that I'd have to kill everyone in the world except for you and then myself just to prove that i love you, then I'll do so."

hyunjin x fem!chubby!reader

warnings: reader is insecure about her body, implied ED, swearing

genre: angst, fluff

hyunjin was a childhood friend of yours, you always hung out with him and you enjoyed being around him. but you were always considered the 'ugly' friend by your other friends, sometimes your family and you yourself agreed sometimes.. ofcourse he never did, he thought you were absolutely beautiful, tough he never said it.

when you were in junior high school, you could never be friends with anyone without someone shipping you two, but with you.. everyone always considered it as a joke. like you were a joke, people kept teasing hyunjin about liking you and he always denied it, and you believed him. he was never harsh about it he was genuinely nice, he was always polite with it but it always seemed to hurt you. you loved him, and deep down he knew he liked you aswell.

he was the handsome popular guy and you were just another one of his fangirls who just happened to be one of his friends. though you did have girl friends alot of girls seemed to hate you because you were friends with hyunjin, saying that you only hung out with him to distract yourself from how fugly you actually are. and honestly you thought the same, it was to the point you starved yourself and had to go to the hospital because you didn't eat the normal amount of food a healthy person should eat for about a month, but despite not eating almost anything at all you still looked like that.

and suddenly when you were in highschool in senior year when in the schools garden, he stood infront of you, bouquet in hand looking straight into your eyes "y/n y/l/n i-... i loved you.. i always have.. so please-" you cut him off. "is this some sort of joke..?" he froze up, confused, time seemed to stop as he just stared at you completely confused "what?"

"did one of your friends force you to do this? did you lose a bet? do you think its funny 'confessing' to the ugly chubby girl?" you we're used to it, guys confessing to you, going out with you because it was a dare or a jokey joke. but its happened to you over and over again for too many times to the point where you couldn't tell the difference between that and the real thing... and when someone actually had feelings, that someone being hyunjin, you turned him down because you didn't trust anyone that said they liked you, either way if it was true or not.

"Y/n-" "save it." angry tears welled up in your eyes as he just stared at you in disbelief "listen! please- im not joking! i genuinely do-" you grit your teeth, holding in your tears as you try not to break down sobbing "i thought you were my friend, hyunjin."

"i am! and i want us to be more than that-"

"Liar! you don't like me, i know you don't. you denied it since we were 10 and even until now you still do. feelings don't change overnight. i cant believe i thought you were my friend, never talk to me again you piece of shit" you ran off into somewhere, you dont know where you just walked. a few hours later you somehow arrived home, you waltzed into your room and just locked yourself in there.

days go by and you return to school completely ignoring him, everytime he came to talk to you, you just brushed him off like he was nothing.

your friends still hung out with him, and they brought you along when they hung out with him, but what else could you do? not hang out with your friends who've known you for years..? no. eventually you forgave him and tolerated him, and started hanging out with eachother more and more.

it wasn't until recently when you guys were alone, he took your hand and looked straight into your eyes when he confessed, again. "i.. i just wanted you to know that it wasnt a joke, i genuinely did love you back then and i didn't care about how you looked you were absolutely beautiful regardless. and i still dont care, i only care about you and how you feel. if it meant that I'd have to kill everyone in the world except for you and then myself just to prove that i love you, then I'll do so."

[navybrat817]

Could you imagine, Rockstar!Bucky for a once not under the influence of anything during a show, only fueled by heartbreak because his girl finally had enough after the biggest argument yet. And usually, they fight and make up but she's avoiding him and the other guys girls and maybe even left the tour 🥺😭 But I cant figure out what the fight would have been about to have Bucky up there, pouring his heart out and his band looking on and not knowing what to do. And the fans confused but also loving the vibe 🥺🥺🥺

Look at him! If this is our White Wolf and Luna, I could see a fight happening because of a pregnancy scare. If he were to go down that path, it would be with you. But now? He's scared. You're both having fun and not quite ready for that, especially with him at the height of his career and loving the life he has. He isn't ready to give that up. Out of that fear, maybe he says something he shouldn't have. He regrets it, but expects you to come back after you throw the nearest object against the wall and storm out of his trailer.

You don't.

He'll see you after his show, right?

Not only do you not show, he notices your bag and some of your stuff is gone.

"What the fuck?"

He asks everyone where you went. No one saw you leave. When he tries to text you, they go unanswered. So do his calls. You haven't blocked him, so that has to be a good sign, right?

But you won't answer Steve or Nat's calls either. Bucky figures maybe they're too close to him, so he goes to Alice and Sunshine. No way would you ignore them. They've become like sisters to you.

Except you aren't responding to them either.

Bucky tries not to panic, but something in him breaks when he realizes you didn't take his favorite jacket with you. Were you cold? Did you miss him? Did you hate him?

Instead of turning to a bottle or anything else, he retreats in a bit on himself. The band, all of them, they're your family. And you're his Luna. His everything. How the hell is he supposed to pretend everything is okay when all he wants is you there?

How does he say he's sorry?

He wants your rage. Your passion. Yell at him. Tell him you hate him. He can take it. But your silence? You not being there? He can't handle that.

It's Alice who sends you the video of him on stage with the caption, "I don't know where you are, but we're worried. Just let us know you're okay, please."

It's a song he wrote for you, but it's tinged with sadness that everyone feels. You see worry cross the faces of the other band members when he closes his eyes and pour his everything into the music. He opens his eyes at the end and looks to the sky. You know he's looking at the moon.

Looking for his Luna.

"Come home."

You finally respond back with, "I'll be okay. I always am."

And you will be. You love Bucky and that'll never change. Maybe you'll call him in the morning. Or maybe he'll remember that secret spot you told him about and he'll find you there.

*****

Because who is the White Wolf without his Luna?

He doesn't want to find out.

Love and thanks! ❤️

[glassartpeasants]

Killer angst drabble cause why not

gn!reader

~~~

You knew how much Kid meant to him. It was obvious from the start of the relationship. Anywhere Kid went, Killer was right behind him. They were best friends since childhood so who were you to try and split them apart? But that didn't mean that it didn't hurt.

There's been countless times where Killer has ditched you for Kid. He wouldn't even notify you that he wouldn't show up, he'd just stand you up. You tried to explain to Killer that it hurt your feelings and if he could at least let you know that he wouldn't show up. It lead to a huge fight. Words were said, tears were shed and it ended up with you two breaking up for a week or two.

You tried to ignore the heartbreak cause you didn't want to make the crew uncomfortable. Hell you even talked to some people about leaving the Kid Pirates. After all, Killer was the reason you joined. So now that you two weren't a thing anymore, there was no reason to be on the Victoria Punk. The tension was too thick for you.

Yet the moment you had gotten ready to pack your bags, Killer approached you. He promised he'd do better and that you did mean something to him. You believed him the first two months but then he slowly started going back to how it was. Which left you to where you are now, watching the stars with your bag in you lap as you sit on the railing.

"The city lights look inviting doesn't it? It's a pretty city and island. Maybe I can stay here until a ship shows up to take me home." Your heart burned at the thought of never hearing Killer's voice again. Even if you didn't want to admit it, a small part of you had been ready to leave since the huge fight. Knowing you'd always be in second, third, and fourth place for Killer. You'd never be his first priority, no matter what happens.

"Not even a competition, and you still won Eustass Kid." Whispering to yourself, your aware of the tears slowly falling down your face. A sad little laugh leaves your lips as you wipe the tears away.

"Your crying." Jumping from the sudden noise, you snap you head around and see your soon to be ex.

"Yeah. I guess I am." A seconds silence fell over the two if you.

"What's wrong?"

"Just settling on my final decision." Even without seeing his face, you knew he was puzzled.

"Which is?" Taking a deep breath, you respond.

"That I'm breaking up with you." Killer’s body tensed at your words. The glassy look in your eyes had him realizing that this wasn't a joke or prank.

"I'm sorry Killer, I knew that Kid was super important to you when we got together and I thought I could handle you spending almost all your time with Kid. Unfortunately I've realized that I cant." Your lips tremble as you try to gently smile.

"I don't want you to lose a friendship you've had since childhood just cause of me." You feel the Victoria Punk start to move away from the island.

"S-Shit (Y/N) I'm sorry. I know I've been ditching you and that I promised that I stopped and you have every right to be mad-"

"I'm not mad. At least not anymore."

"But you should be! You should be mad! I made you a promise and I broke it after saying I'd change. Why aren't you yelling at me?! Why aren't you mad that I lied to you?!"

"Because I love you." Killer could feel his heart beating fast as the weight of his actions finally hit him. He tried to speak yet nothing came out.

"And that's why I have to go. Life is about living and learning. And we simply learned that we weren't meant to be. But that's okay, you'll finally someone who works out better for you." You start to put on your bag to get ready to jump off the ship and onto the dock the Victoria Punk was moving away from. Killer grabs your hand and pulls himself closer to you.

"I don't want someone else, I want you. You and only you. Give me another chance please (Y/N)." Facing Killer and his mask, you press a kiss to where his lips would be. Tears flow down your face knowing that's the last kiss you'd ever give him.

"I better see your name in the newspaper often." Slipping tour hand away from his quickly, you whisper one last thing before jumping on the very last edge of the dock.

"Goodbye Massacre Soilder Killer. I love you." You land on the dock and watch the Victoria Punk sail past the dock. And you watch with a heavy heart as Killer starts running to the end of the ship to catch you while screaming to stop the ship.

He looked at you and screamed your name as he sailed farther and farther away, watching you wave him goodbye with tears in your eyes.

[machiten]

that's my seat! (pt 2)

academic rival scaramouche x gn!reader

warnings: scaramouche(bro is a whole warning), foul language(it's scaramouche we're talking about here so), bits of xiaoven (fuck you i love his ship), idk what else

4.2k words

❗not proofread ❗

the day after that, you didn't attend class which was quite unusual since there was never a day where you attempted to skip class (one time you did but it was so that you can study for another class) and it alarmed him, just a little bit. maybe you got sick? an urgent matter perhaps? but you didn't file an excuse letter so the teachers can excuse you. scaramouche wanted to ask your friends but his pride is a little too much for that. oh and he was also sent to the principal's office the same day. it's not the first time of course, trips to the office are basically routine now. when scaramouche entered, the principal is a bit surprised to not seeing you trail behind the purple haired achiever.

"oh? this is new. where's (last name)?"

"...don't know, i haven't seen her since this morning."

"that's a nice hit you got there." tye principal addressed the patches on his face. scaramouche clicked his tounge as he flicked his head to the side, as to hide his face from shame.

if he was to be honest to himself, he aready had his eyes on you since day one. someone is on par with him? really?? now he doesn't see that everyday. it changed his overall view on school. no more boring lectures with no one to debate with, no more being dragged alone to every bullshit quiz bee contests (you're also gettting dragged), and getting high scores are actually fun now because he gets to make fun of you.

so as the days go by... wait, days? how long has it been?! he hasn't seen a single strand of your hair. he already checked certain spots around the school everyday, hoping that maybe you were just avoiding him therefore the lack of your presence. he was calm, not until one of your friends went to him, asking for your whereabouts. him. your sworn enemy, is being asked where the fuck you are.

"hey"

scaramouche turned to the voice seeing aether with a frown. "what." scaramouche replied.

"i didn't think i was ever gonna ask you this but im gonna overlook all the shit that you did for now because this is important. have you seen (name)?" aether grimaced

"no, i haven't seen her. also, how the fuck should i know? we're not close." he crossed his arms, as if he just heard the most absurd question in his entire existence.

"fuck" aether cursed under his breath. "well, thanks i guess." aether waved and walked away. when he turned into a corner, scaramouche's facade fell. the hell? not even aether knows what happened to you? feeling guilt, scaramouche fished his phone out of his pocket and opened his contact list oh yeah he also doesn't have your number, you're not even friends on any social medias. he cursed under his breath. now he feels really bad, blaming himself for your disappearance, guilt eating him inside out.

the days go by, scaramouche ignored the prickling feeling inside his chest. you'll come back, right? he knows you would, you wouldn't abandon your education, right?? he just had to be patient. but he cant really ignore you, everything he sees reminds him of you. everytime he enters the classroom, he gets reminded by the chair he sits in, expecting you to come in a minute later to play tug of war with the chair. in lectures, he's always ready to spit out a comeback whenever you add something to the lesson but this time he kept waiting until the lecture ends until he realizes that no you weren't there at all to debate with him. when the teacher hands out test results, he always looks at the back (where you sit) to compare scores but everytime, he sees nothing but an empty chair.

you have perfectly blended yourself in scaramouche's routine. and everytime it happens, the guilt plaguing his mind feeds from it. he went home that day accepting the fact that it is entirely his fault and he should fix everything. that's the least he could do after everything that he's done.

"im home," scaramouche exclaimed as he entered his house, putting away his shoes on the side. "welcome home kuni- you okay?" his sister, which is a splitting image of their mother, said as she paused the tv. "yeah, anyways. im probably gonna regret this but can you both cook for yourselves today? i have to go somewhere. please don't burn the pan handle again, thanks." he said as he immediately ran to his room to change.

"where are you going?!" his sister shouted from downstairs. "uhh to my friend's house!" he shouted back.

"you have friends?!"

"what is that supposed to mean?!!"

"im gonna tell mom you're going somewhere!"

"ok!"

when he was out of the house, he took at his phone and looked at the picture of your address in you notebook when he sneakily stole your notes.

'damn they live far... good thing i have a motorcycle.' he took his keys, wore his helmet, and got the engine started.

after 20 minutes of trafic and searching for your apartment, he took off his helmet got off his bike. he can feel people staring at him (i mean, who wouldn't). he went to the elevator and pressed your floor number. he got out when he heard the ding and immediately went to find your door number.

'143... 143.... 143... 143... 143...' he chanted the number in his head. when he found your door, he took a really deep breath and knocked. after a few seconds, he heard shuffling from the other side, then the door opened. he expected to see you but to his surprise, he saw a dark haired boy fading to bright torquoise with two braids framing the side of his face.

...did he get the wrong place?

he stood there like an idiot for a few seconds until he heard the boy talk.

"so, need anything?" he sounds cheery, definitely the extroverted type. "uhm, do you know anyone here by the name (name)?" he held his helmet a bit tighter. "oh (name)? wait I'll call them." the braided boy then shouted inside his apartment. "(name)!! someone's looking for you!! again!!"

scaramouche winced at the noise-- you're inside??? then what the fuck is this boy doing in your house? is he your boyfriend? (is he too late?) then, as if the heavens opened up for him, he heard curses with an awfully familiar voice far inside the apartment.

"tell my brother to fuck off!!"

"it's not your brother!!"

"well then tell my teacher im fine!!"

"..well-! it's not a teacher either!!"

"...."

"what does he look like?!!"

"can you both stop yelling like mountain dwellers-"

"HE LOOKS EMO!!" scaramouche was offended.

after a moment of silence, the boy spoke to him, less volume this time. "sorry about that, im venti by the way! she hasn't been doing well for the past few weeks because something happened at her school or something, i hope you understand.." a sweat rolled down scaramouche's back. "it's ok, im--"

"venti who the hell-" a new participant has entered the conversation, you. and when scaramouche saw you, he felt relief and overbearing guilt at the same time. relieved that you look fine and healthy, guilty because of the things he has done. when you saw him on the other hand, rage has once again boiled in your heart.

"get out." you tried slamming the door close but his feet was faster, slipping in to the gap of the door and the frame. he winced a bit from the impact but that's the least of his concerns right now.

"wait, shit, can we talk-"

"what more do you want from me?! im finally gone from your life and now you got here to torment me more?!" if you were any stronger, you could've turned his feet into mush. "no, im here to apologize-!"

"i dont care! fuck off!" oh he is not giving up. fortunately for him (not for you) he is stronger and managed to keep the door from closing. "can you please just listen to me!!"

"go away!"

"no!"

this went on for like an eternity until someone inside your apartment held the back of your shirt and pulled you away from the door, making it swing open from scaramouche's force. "xiao, what the fuck let go!!" turns out venti called his boyfriend from their room while you and scaramouche were fighting. while xiao was holding you back from basically doing second degree murder, scaramouche carefully set his helmet down on the floor, avoiding your attempt at swings. (your previous hit hasn't even fully recovered yet.)

"(name) calm down, be rational. nothing will be solved when you're acting like a maniac and wont communicate." xiao said sternly. "how can i when he's the exact reason as to why im here right now!" at this statement, venti's expression became dark.

"what."

you got out of xiao's hold and stormed back inside your room, slamming the door close. xiao followed you in. scaramouche clicked his tougue, about to follow you when someone stoped him, "(name), wait-!"

"hold the fuck up." venti grabbed his shoulder. "you're the bitch that got them here?"

"yeah, so?"

"get out."

"let go of me." scaramouche shrugged venti off. "besides, that's what im here for." he looked at the room you went into with an unreadable look.

"do i have to repeat what i said? fuck, not only are you stupid but deaf too? get out." venti mocked him. 'what the fuck he was giggly just a minute ago.'

"ok listen, i just want to apologize to them. i know i fucked up and im basically ruining her life right now that's why i want to take responsibility. can you at least tell her that?" it is clear how scaramouche regrets what he did. venti's look sharpened. "how do i know you're being sincere?"

.

.

.

.

.

.

"(name)?? can you please open the door?" venti knocked on your door. after a few seconds, the door opened to xiao. "where's (name)?" xiao pointed at the bed in the corner of the room. there he sees you lying down, face buried in your pillow. "they won't talk. like at all, ive tried everything." xiao sighed.

venti has been your roommate ever since you got kicked out from your house. xiao is his boyfriend of 3 years and they're both two yeas older than you (xiao moved in a year ago). thanks to the both of them, they are basically your older siblings now. they did what your brother never could. they took care of you the past few days, even if they're both busy with their degrees. they would leave food in the fridge, remind you to take your medicine (they both have alarms of when you need to take your medicines), they bring you food in your room when you insist that you dont want to eat, saying, 'even if you don't want to eat, you need to. ' and proceeds to spoon feed you (even if it's embarrasing), and is just genuinely worried for you, especially when you came home that day with aether carrying you on his back.

"do you think they're asleep? how do they even breathe..." venti walked closer and sat down on the side of your bed. "hey (name), I know you can hear me so listen up, ok?? sca... or whatever his name is, wants to talk to you and to apologize for what he did and he wants to take responsibility. he said he's gonna get you back to school no matter what it takes and he is also sorry for being insensitive."

no answer.

"he's gonna pick you up at 6:45 tomorrow. i wasn't gonna tell you any of this because he doesn't seem sincere until he proved it to me earlier. just talk to him ok?? i know life is shit but you have to keep going to prove yourself to your parents." he pats your head. he looks around the room and lands his gaze on your desk which if filled with books and notes. it seems like you haven't given up yet which made venti smile.

"sleep well (name), goodnight."

as they both got out of your room, xiao spoke up. "what did he do to prove himself?"

venti winked. "it's a secret."

and that's how venti got a huge bite mark on his cheek.

.

.

.

.

.

.

oh you heard everything. what does he mean he's picking you up tomorrow?! prove himself? how?! what responsibility?! he's making it sound like he got you pregnant!!

and he actually DID come the next morning. venti informed that you didnt get ready like at all and you know what bro did? he waited. in the living room. the whole time. he went 'hurry up we'll be late for first period' as if there's nothing wrong with anything.

so fast forward, he managed to convince you to go with him (reluctantly). what you didn't expect though was to be met with his (motorcycle brand), infront of your apartment.

"i am not riding that."

"we are riding that, here put this on." he said as he hands you a helmet. you gave it back to him as you turned around, about to go back inside the apartment but he pulled you back by your collar. "fucking- PUT IT ON WERE LATE." he exclaimed as he gave you a frustrated look.

"you're lucky that I actually felt guilty and went all the way here for your stupid ass. now get on I don't have all day." scaramouche said as he slotted the helmet on your head and got the engine started. you reluctantly sat behind him, sitting funny. "have you ever rode a motorcycle your whole life?"

"I have but, not like this one!" there is an inch gap between you and him causing you to sit funny. then he jerked the motorcycle forward by suddenly revving the engine causing you to lose balance and slip, so now you're the closest to him than you ever were.

"hold on tight, I like driving fast."

"what. wait--WAIT I'M NOT REA- wAIT-! YOU ABSOLUTE AS-!"

----

this went on for weeks. he would appear on your doorstep, get you both to school and when classes end, he'd drive you back home. and, yes, you did talk but it was more like recounting the old days, sometimes laughing at the stupid stuff you both fought over before. and he apologized, of course. and it was a well said apology, it's as if he's been practicing (he was). you forgave him with the promise of him watching his mouth the next time because if he won't, then you wont be the only victim of his sharp words.

when you arrived at school that day, your friends immediately tackled you into a hug. they were saying about how they were so worried about you and that they miss the daily bickering you and scaramouche does. they also mentioned how scaramouche has been out of it these past few weeks (which is weird because why would he do that ahhahaha...). Aether literally went into tears when he saw you walking down the hallway saying he missed you and shit and that he has to eat lunch with his sister which was torture (his words not mine).

what irks you though is the funny look they give you everytime you and scaramouche walks through the classroom doors at the same time. so you were like;

"can you walk up first, they're looking at us funny everytime."

"stop being dramatic." and proceeds to tug you at your sleeve.

he's not gonna lie, he likes the look your friends are making. he also likes the red on your face everytime. ever since you've returned to school, he's making the effort to minimize your fights (except for the fun ones) and to actually get to know you better.

through this, you've also got to know him better. and this made you realize he actually isn't that bad (if you really think about it). you now know he prefers bitter food over sweet ones, he cooks really good, he has a sister that almost looks identical to his mother, he has a really short auntie, he has a list of future victims (you don't want to know what that means), and he's genuinely just a chill guy. you just got on his bad (playful) side the first time you met him.

though there are times where he gets a bit... unwell... but we all have that in us, right? the thoughts? well, i mean, i can hear it everyday so I hope you do too<3

"venti i am fucked."

"alright let's get you to the abortion center."

you looked at him perplexed, "what?"

"you said you got fucked, let's go."

"NOT LIKE THAT." you facepalmed. sometimes you wonder if he really is two years older than you.

"hehe im just kidding, what is it?" he giggles as he continues to stir the pot as he was making dinner. "i do not feel safe around him anymore." you muttered while nibbling at a piece of vegetable.

"who."

you shrieked after hearing a new voice. venti turned around to see what's going on. there stood behind you is xiao, who just got back from class, he got his piercings and everything looking like he will beat you up if you breathe. "you scared the fuck out of me, can you make some noise when you get home next time?" you calmed your beating heart as xiao apologized. "but yeah im talking about scaramouche. he's acting... different."

at this, venti perks up, "oh? what kind of different?"

"i do not like that look on your face."

"c'mon tell me!" venti now has his full attention to you as he passed his apron to xiao so that he can take over dinner.

"well, he's weird. i mean, he keeps doing weird stuff and im not saying im uncomfortable with it's just... unusual? did he really feel that guilty to the point where he drives me to and from school everyday?" you slumped on your chair, fiddling with a fork. venti let's out a hum, tapping his cheeks as if he's thinking. "have you ever considered that maybe, just maybe, he likes you?" he adds.

"what?"

venti goes around the counter and sits beside you, "like, romantically. let's enumerate! he drives you to and from school, walks you to your class, buys you coffee when you lack sleep and he KNOWS you lack sleep, wakes you up in class, picks out your favorite flovors in a pack of gummies, shares lunch with you, lends you his notes, uhhh what else...-"

"WAIT WAIT THAT'S ENOUGH!" you flung your hands, embarrassed. "how can you even be sure! aether also do some those sometimes, and we're really great friends!"

venti stared at you, "ok first of all, aether is gay he literally has a boyfriend. second of all, i know this because xiao also did all these 'cringey' stuff before and hey, look at us!" he hugs xiao and they almost fell on the floor.

"aether has a boyfrie-?"

venti squished you cheeks, "that's besides the point! listen to me (name), i am a love expert, i know what im doing. i can even tell you what xiao did that will match with what scaramouche is doing-"

"dinner's ready." a pot filled with delicious food is placed at the counter by a blushy xiao. "venti, i love you, but please shut up." he says, embarrassed.

the next day, you payed better attention to scaramouche, hoping to prove venti wrong.

and boy were you the wrong one.

the way he holds your hand when he speeds up while driving his bike, when he stays after he's dropped you off in your apartment to ensure tour safety, the way he puts more effort in his hand writing so that you can understand better, the timing he has when you are in an uncomfortable situation, the little shapes of fruit in his lunch that he shares with you, when he brings hair clips when your hair gets in the way of work,

it goes on forever.

so then you decided to confront him one day.

"scara, do you like me?"

you both are currently outside, studying for an upcoming test. scaramouche answered without a second thought.

"yeah."

"no, like, ugh... this is embarrassing, i meant, do... do you like me, romantically?" you rephrased your question. this made scaramouche ponder. should he answer honestly? lie to your face to keep whatever is going on between you two? give tou the silent treatment, perhaps?

"actually y'know what, dont answer that i-" you were cut off by the contact you feel in your hands. he clasps your hand gently across the table. he looks at your locked hands, unease creeping into his system.

then, he finally opens his mouth, "if... if i tell you the truth, would you.. still stay by my side..?" you can feel his grip slowly tightening. "i like what's going on right now, it's basically routine to me now. i... i like going to your apartment every morning, i like making you bentos, i like sharing notes with you, i like...i like competing with you every test, i like being the first one to get to your chair but i also like the light in your eyes when you get there first...!" he's shaking now. he goes quiet for a bit then goes for a deep breath.

"...i like you, okay? its not even funny anymore, i can't get you off my mind... i know i despised you before, to the point where i would steal your notes back then-"

"so that's how you found out about my address..!"

he got red,

"that's-! that's not the point! and- LET ME TALK DAMNIT IT'S ALREADY HARD WHEN ITS EMBARRASSING!!-ahem- when you didn't come back i felt really guilty and i keep looking at the damn door whenever anyone comes in expecting it to be you and i felt really stupid that time. i hate how you make me feel stupid, i hate how stupid you are, , making me do stupid stuff... but i like you and i can't help it..." you can feel his hands getting cold and shaky.

"...and if you dont feel the same, then i will just kill mysel-"

"NO WAIT HOLD ON-!" you stood up bringing his hand with you. when he finally looks up, he's in the brink of tears. you held his hand "i just asked a question and you're out here announcing suicide..! i just wanted to clarify... so that i wouldn't look stupid confessing to... you and then getting... rejected..." you trailed off. you can already feel your whole face heating up, blood boiling in your stomach.

now there's two idiots outside in the park, blushing like no one's business, staring into each other's soul. one is in the brink of tears while the other is standing straight like a statue, unmoving.

after a good minute or two, after the thoughts processed, one of them couldn't hold it in apparently. tears streamed out of indigo eyes and he hurriedly tried to wipe it away, to hide the evidence of how fragile he actually is. you scammered into your bag to find something to wipe his tears away. when you got near him, you found yourself covered in him, he is grasping whatever he can hold of you, clammering on your clothes as if you are his life line. he is all over you, babbling nonsense. you can only make out some of his words like;

"fuck i thought i would have to fight my thoughts again-"

"you have no idea of what you're doing to me-"

"tell this to anyone and i will chase you down to childe's ass crack-"

"fuck i love you so much do not leave me please-" and

"I'll still take your seat, i don't care-"

literal nonsense and yet you can feel the love radiating off him at that moment. he is sobbing and furiously wiping his tears.

cofessing your feeling to someone that radiates as much personality as scaramouche is a win lose situation for you. but to him? it's either he dies or he lives, there is no in between.

extra;

when scaramouche got home, he is met with his mother at the door, a spatula in her hand.

"mom put that down, please-"

"you're late."

"it's 6pm."

"yeah and you're late. also, why are you wearing sunglasses? are you doing drugs?" ei kept throwing questions at scaramouche while he is desperately trying to remove the spatula out of his mother's grip. "mom, please i was just out with my lov- friend-- and please let go of the-"

"FRIEND?? who is this friend? you have a friend?! why didn't you tell me?!--"

"mom-"

"kuni, this makes me so happy! you have a friend! invite them over right now, i made dinner!" ei smiled at her proudest achievement.

scaramouche paled.

"YOU MADE WHAT?!"

*scara wearing sunglasses bc is eyes are puffy*

[soquimic]

some things i’ve manifested using the law of assumption —note that i’ve been using it to manifest for years, i was around 8 or 9, so it’s a lot—

1- when i was 8, i remember leaving the church and going home. i really wanted to go to the mall that day because it was almost xmas eve and there’s a lot of activities in my country, i also wanted to see the big xmas tree by the electric stairs. i remember that i affirmed everyday only one affirmation, i didn’t pay attention but lately i realized that ive always been living in the end and didnt realize because my affirmation stated the desire already fulfilled. i affirmed the whole day, i even went to the backyard and looked at the sky as if i was talking with god or something similar. i started affirming around 11 am and by 5 pm my mom was getting ready and i asked her “where are you going?” and she literally told me: i received your school grades, they are all good for me so im taking you to the mall. i lived happily the whole week because i thought that was my first encounter with god or something 😂😂

2- this was in my freshman or sophomore year, i really cant remember the time really well in this one but i do remember that my friend and i had fought and i was really scared because he ignored me everyday and we used to be really close so i reminded my subconscious everyday for like 3 days straight that they were not mad, they were just dealing with stuff or busy (yeah the gaslighting 😘😘) and nah, by day 4 he talked to me again and everything was back to normal like nothing happened.

3- food. yes, the thing i manifest the most is food because i adore eating. i used to live with the assumption: my mom is bringing me chocolate/cheesecake or pizza from work today. EVERY WEEK. and it would happen, i got used to it and stopped assuming random things that had to do with food.

i cant remember any other one, dementia patient right here 🚶🏻‍♀️🚶🏻‍♀️🚶🏻‍♀️

as for my recent ones, ive got a bunch. im a very anxious person and tbh manifesting before was way easier than now. the pressure is killing me but i still managed to manifest stuff from 2021 to this day.

1- a boyfriend. yes, i manifested a boyfriend around april 2021. i didnt go into detail but he had everything i was looking for + he was amazing (at first ofc), he later changed and i had to start attending to therapy sessions cause i got diagnosed and im still traumatized. i forgot to script the loyalty part… so yeah he definitely did cheat and gaslit me. but he made me feel amazing while it lasted. we broke up around 2 months ago and we had 2 years together. i didnt manifest the break up, he did. which is good. the universe sent me signs cause days later after the break up i found out messages and stuff of him cheating the same week of the break up.

2- i manifested for my attachment to go away. note: im the type of person to get attached emotionally to people, i was emotionally depending on my ex, so as soon as we broke up i had a dream where somebody told me to just go out the day after and spoil myself. buy whatever i want and spend some money cause i was working so hard to buy the flight to go and see him. 4 days later when i found out he was with another person i cried in my way to work and i was feeling so well that day that i literally did my hair and makeup but it got smudged :(( but that was the last and first time i cried over him after everything was over. next day i woke up feeling positive and i suddenly let everything go. bad people eventually get what they deserve in life so i just got over it and im not attached to him or the old story anymore!!

3- i manifested new friends plus i contacted my old friends back. most of them were in bad terms with me cause i blocked them out of nowhere because of my ex, everything was so messed up but they forgave me and they are very good friends after all, they text me and hype me up every day so i cannot be more grateful :D

4- i manifested my sp :D after these 2 months i thought to myself: if that person could move on, you can too. so i did, although my sp and me are not fully prepared for a relationship rn, we’re both aware of our mutual attraction and promised to give us time until we were both fully healed 🫶🏻

5- MONEYYYYYY. yeah it sounds like im too ambitious when it comes to money but im soooo silly. i spend everything i get plus i need to pay for my own stuff at school. i dont like bothering my parents with my expenses —even though they are supposed to provide for me but i feel like a problem when i do that so—, i manifested money like 4 times this year??? first, my parents never give me more than 100 for my birthday and all of a sudden they gave me 500$??? i even posted about it my happiness was out of the roof. i went to the cinema w my friends to watch an anime movie that got released on my birthday yayayaya. later, i started working and got like 1,200 in the summertime and now i manifested more money this week TO SAVE. i literally by assuming got into the void and manifested a bag full of money. i wont stfu about it IM AMBITIOUS in a good way with money, i need to move out and start building my future (bro im still 17 😔)

6- clothes and makeup. uMmm im not a fan of makeup tbh buttttt i wanted to have some in case one day i decide to put some on, my skin has always been clear and pretty, my lashes are super long and my eyebrows are really thick so i only worry about doing a perfect lip combo. i got a box and 2 bags full of makeup <3 especially makeup of my favorite brands 😙😙😙 i also was able to buy clothes online very similar to the ones that i had on my pinterest boards ^^ but i kinda forgot to buy shoes.. BFFR 😭😭😭 ive been repeating the same 5 shoes, but im gonna buy some new ones soon!!

7- colognes and jewelry 😘😘😘😘😘 yes, im a fan of these too!! my dad gave me a box full of earrings and rings. but not any kind of earrings, LONG AND BIG EARRINGS W UNUSUAL DESIGNS just how i like them. and some cute rings w rabbit, figures, etc. the colognes smell really well!! i got the nicki minaj perfume in all versions, dior colognes and a box with like 8 different types of victoria’s sprays 🚶🏻‍♀️🚶🏻‍♀️🚶🏻‍♀️

8- a good school year. its only been a month but ive made friends and i find a lot of people WHO SUDDENLY KNOW ME, waving at me in the hallways and im like OH YEAH HI even tho idk who they are?? it feels so goodddddd i feel like an it girl omg 😭😭😭 and also my grades are MAGNIFIC, i got accepted in our honors program and im currently a staff cadet in our military program I DID NOT EVEN KNOW IT WOULD BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO ACQUIRE A HIGH RANK HERE BUT I DID ITTTT I DID ITTTT IM LEADING :D

yeah i cant remember more but thats all i’ve accomplished so far, see u dont need the void to fucking manifest 🥱🥱🥱🥱 gurllll-

[dream-this-nightmare-over]

John Shelby imagine

For all my John girlies!

hi @shelundeadxxxx :))))

As always, you can find this and many more imagines in my book of imagines

How many times have you thought to yourself if only I talked less, none of this would happen. If I learnt how to keep my mouth shut, everyone would move on in their ignorance and I wouldn't have to go through ordeal all too well known and expected of being scolded reprimanded shushed for speaking my mind. Peace is fractured ice in winter that permanently teases coming of spring if you are brave enough to break through. But there is always someone waiting on surface with hammer and axe to push you back under.

It's not the truth that scares. Aftermath is foreseeable agony. No weather check needs to announce emergency alarm for storm that is hurling once unleashed. To fight injustice with scarred armor is to walk through downpour in tattered raincoat and wonder later how you caught cold.

Y/n slept counted hours filled notebooks with filthy words in flowery handwriting. There were no books here but old photo albums coughing dust and history is best to leave unbothered. In house of screaming people, even ghosts hide grateful they have somewhere to escape. Our ghosts are ashamed of ourselves. Thought brought small smiles to y/p face. John didn't believe in ghosts. He would tease you till you were both rolling on the floor, him trickling you then nuzzling his face in your neck and cuddling in tight warm embrace till it was time to part. He knew how much you needed someone to just hold you tight to feel presence of another heart close to yours to calm you down and convince yours it's alive and loved and acknowledged. You would wrap yourself in his hug and he would watch you silently as you gave yourself to calm you only ever felt when you were together, calm washing over your heart leaving demons stranded cut off for time being. but john is brave; he does what he wants and he never gets caught.

All your bravery ever brought you is running away crying yourself to sleep telling yourself to breath soothing your heart that everything will be okay. No one ever listened to you. They treated your words like child's blabbering, like you haven't went through shit to see the truth But john saw you. 'I will marry you whenever you say you are ready' And you would thousand times already if there weren't your mother's tears flowing in your memory and father's helplessness to take back words make them unsaid.

Her relationship with John and Shelby fam had nothing to do with fact that she was being held as prisoner in her grandmother's home. It was the words she spoke, the bravery to talk back. Psycho granny who cant deal with world changing, people leaving, so she inserts herself in narrative as tyrannic matriarch when irl she is nothing but nuisance. Except when she locks you up, and leaves you to starve hoping it will teach you some respect and love. Funny how people believe you can force someone to respect you. Respect is earned. As for love, most elusive force of universe, yet there are still people out there who demand it like it's another thing you can trade on market. Suppose you can. But not the real kind.

John was one person who came into y/n's life and made breathing and loving seem like easiest things in world. They were best of pals, he never asked of her anything, but to be happy. When she was sad, he would go out of his way to make her laugh again, for he knew storms are here to pass and making it to the other side is always easier with friend by your side.

His adoration with y/n was evident to everyone, besotted from head to toe, if needed he would burn down every fucker and whole world that dared spill tears down y/n's cheeks. It was his girl. No one was allowed to mess with what is most prescious to Shelbys.

Y/n tried the door knob. Ran y/p fingers between door and frame gripping on surface testing to pull it open, scratching y/p nails down the wall then running back under covers before someone came and saw what y/p has done.

Time passed no one came. It seemed the world forgot about just another child who thought too much. Did Shelby's really didn't notice their friend missing?

Sun went up and went down, marking fourth day that y/n grandma locked y/p away for having opinion. guess that's how world works. It breaks your heart and takes your dreams and stomps out your hope and then sneers in your face asking why you didnt fight harder.

y/n was exhausted and defeated. Curled on carpet y/p could feel life seeping out as y/p whole body went in hibernation state. After seventh day, Only the mind was alive. Drenched in sweat, dizzy from hunger, whole world was dancing in peripheral but no one reached out a hand. She passed out from hunger several times, not bothering anymore to get back on her feet or drag her limp exhausted body on bed.

She was drifting through motions, not sure anymore what is real and what not. john was there aparation stepping from behind curtains, galaxy of freckles spinning on celling above her, his laugh seeping from memories all around her, his soft gaze those familiar blues telling her everything will be alright just like he always did when they would roll on floor his nonchalance and deep care hiding under soft touch as he caresses her face his sunrays reaching for soul underneath battered skin. As the passing clouds snuffed out the sunlight, casting whole room in sudden darkness, his blues would get stern and serious, gangster who knows what's the price to pay for every indulgence, he would tell her to hold on just a little longer. But her tortured mind on brink of collapsing would let go and drift in darkness, falling and watching blue lights of home on surface getting smaller and on the end eventually closing up, hope dangerously tethering just out of reach as darkness closed around her.

He will come, he promised. He will notice my absence, I am more than my silence.

She went out thinking back to days they spent sneaking out of crowded Garrison to make snowmen and have snowball fights in winter of their youth. John's smile flushed cheeks, his arms around her shoulders will she ever feel home again?

Next time she woke up, it was with bang.

It was early morning, dawn has barely risen when doors splintered in parts as someone force opened them.

Too weak to jolt, vibrations glided off y/p frame, just a lump of clothes on floor.

John comes in, impatience and worry all over his face, on his heels are his brothers checking for possible threats and surprises hiding in plain sight. But there was nothing there but one body on the carpet, wrapped in itself, peering at them through glassy stare.

John is wild with furry on the way there, collecting the gang ready for fight. Arthur and Tommy knew there was no stopping him, and when they heard how dire situation really was, they were ready in no time to take arms and end it for good. y/n was family, and attack on one is attack on all.

For her, John becomes softball. He marches into room kneeling down beside her body. Checking the pulls, he takes y/n in his arms laying her on settee. Gently touching her cheek relief flooding his features as your eyes open and find his.

'what made you take so long?' y/n tries weakly, always the one ready to crack the joke in every misfortune.

he pulls her in hug as answer. Restless, on verge of breaking, he gathers her in his arms, smell of lemon and tobacco envelopes her senses 'oh y/n, my dearest y/n'

she pulls back and he takes good look at her, cursing for ever letting her out of his sight. He turns around giving Tommy and Arthur a sign to go on with the plan.

'i am getting you out and burning this whole shithole down. "

Through haze y/n watch herself reaching towards his cheek half believing her hand will pass through another ghost of dearest face.

John takes her hand from his face and planta hard kiss on her palm.

"john, thoughts of you made me survive in this room"

There was warmth where cold stale breath of hallucination hanged and was being slowly dispersed as familiar blues stirred her heart back to life.

'i am so sorry for letting this happen. I should have been there. You are always on my mind, little one. i got held back, and - gosh- y/n, you mean too much to me to ever let anyone come close to you again' And they are both lost in embrace of thousand promises that no time or adversaries will stand a chance against bond stretching between them.

John wraps you in his coat, protective arm around you, smirk and toothpick in corner of his mouth as you descend the stairs and are joined by Tommy who is lighting his cigarette. 'Brother," he says handing John the match.

Tommy ushers you out on driveway where you wait for john to catch up. Arthur smiles fatherly, dusting his sleeves. 'No worries, mfs will pay for this.' Tommy shots him look that said 'don't ruin the surprise' fixing John's now yours coat then cradling your head to his chest in embrace. 'You alright, love?' he asks. You nod eating apple your first meal in a while, that Arthur produced from inside his coat, and he takes it as cue not to push it any further.

'I got it under control' You manage to make out through clattering teeth once John comes back. He pulls you closer planting a kiss on side of your head. 'I know you did, darling. I just brought logistics for final touch'

At that moment bomb blasts behind you, taking apart in explosion of embers that house of misery. It shakes the ground but john tucks you safely beside him as you all walk away together through smoke of new beginnings.

one foot in front of other, board the train and live out rest of your lives never leaving each other side.

[noroi1000]

hello ! Can you write a fic where reader who is gojos wife accidentally to travels to when gojo and reader were just students and havent started dating yet?? Like young reader is like ""ohmilord!! I got married?!?! Who is it??" And future reader is like..."cant spill" ?? Thank you have a nice day😇

In a few years 5

An: So I created this as the next part of this series because it fit here.

Words: 1,5k

"T-Toru? What is it?" you asked looking at the silver pocket watch in his hand.

"Cursed item." He said with the same smile.

"I thought I told you not to bring dangerous items home." You said looking at him sharply.

"If I brought Sukuna's finger it would be even worse. This finger is dangerous. However, this item is made by humans. By sorcerers like me."

"Like you? I thought you were going to say something else..."

"Fine, created by sorcerers much older than me who could do only that. They probably lived 200 years ago and none of them are alive now."

"Now better. Now, please, put this in a safe place and take it to school tomorrow. I don't want curses in our house when you're not around."

"My son will protect you!"

"Your son? What if it's a daughter?" You raised an eyebrow.

"Maybe even a daughter! Gender doesn't matter ! My child will protect you! Because I feel the energy changes in your body."

"Who would have thought my husband would be a walking pregnancy test..." you muttered with a smile before heading to the laundry room to pick up the laundry Satoru was supposed to do this week.

"Be careful. I'll take it. You can't overload yourself." He said grabbing the clothes basket.

"Satoru, three weeks ago we found out I was pregnant. I can do household chores."

He ignored you and took the clothes to the dressing room.

"And then you tell me you're not overprotective at all..." You smiled with your head tilted slightly.

"Can't I take care of you?" he asked, shouting from the room.

"Of course you can, but I can see you're being overprotective now."

"Hey! I don't want anything to happen to you, okay? Is it that bad that I do this?" he asked as he entered the living room where you were.

"I have nothing against. Now, calm down. Big baby." You patted his head.

Then you hugged him.

"So what was this watch about?" you asked.

"There are two in the world. One gold and the other silver. Gold brings you into the future, and silver into the past . I just wanted to show you this. Because, you know, I'd like to see what our baby will look like..."

"You're impatient. Wait a few months."

"I know. But I was curious. Because, you know, when I was a teenager, I remember going to the future, and when I came back, I knew you would definitely be my girlfriend. Because it was such a belief combined with the fact that in the future I saw that it was."

"What does it have to do with it?"

"I don't remember anything that happened when I was in the future then. And now we met me from the past. So it must be true. Even though he probably remembered as much as I remembered after that trip. I wanted to see our baby at least for a while. And maybe then I would know what gender it is now? Or does it have my eyes?" He laughed.

"Then why do you have a silver watch and not a gold one?" You asked as you pulled away.

"The past self must have put it somewhere where I don't know. Maybe in another place? Because I only found this. I was thinking about going back in time and looking at your virgin ass during training."

You hit him on the head as he laughed.

"You're perverted!"

"I am your husband."

"But you're 28 and I was 16 at the time!"

"Will I be that even if I look at you as my wife? Come on. I already know every inch of your body."

"You're not going back in time to look at my ass!"

"It's the same now. I know. Or even better?" He leaned down to punch you in the buttock. "Much better now! The only thing different about your body is that you were a virgin then and now you have my child inside of you. You don't know how cute it is!"

"Or would I like to travel back in time to look at you when you were a virgin? And you probably acted like a perpetually horny animal."

"You weren't wrong about that. Every time I looked at you." He laughed, waving his hands.

"Give me that watch." You said. "Maybe I'll tell myself in the past not to marry you as long as you're such a pervert."

"But baby, you love me! That also means you love me as a pervert!"

"You finally admitted it. But maybe it would have been nice to see old school when we were young."

"We're not old, (y/n)."

"Okay, but we were teenagers then."

"Fine... Even if we don't remember much of it, we can do it. Hold on, I'll go get a blindfold." He handed you a silver watch.

You felt the coldness of the metal, and you weighed it with your hand. It was probably real silver...

To check this, you clicked the button, slowly counting the seconds.

And when the watch showed 12 seconds, you stopped it.

"Mochi, we were supposed to move in together!" cried your husband sadly when he saw the watch lightly shining.

And your image began to wave before you disappeared.

"Halo! Mrs!"

You heard a voice calling you.

You slowly opened your eyes.

You saw the girl's face. You from your younger years...

"Where am I..." You muttered quietly.

"At Jujutsu High in Tokyo." Said the girl sitting next to you on the bench.

"Are you -." you started.

"Do you know me?" She asked, pointing at her.

"I certainly wouldn't mistake myself from the past..." you laughed.

"From the past? Wait, are you me from the future? Is that why you look like me?!"

"Yeah... I couldn't really click that button myself."

"Button? Oh... Time-traveling watches?"

"Do you know about them? I don't remember learning about it here."

"Recently, Satoru was talking about this. That he had heard that they were here and that he would look for it to visit the future."

"Oh... I know something about that..."

"Let me guess, he made it?"

"Yes. But he doesn't remember anything after that. Probably. What year is it?"

"2006."

"So I moved 12 years, huh... When I get home, I'm going to be lectured about how I should have moved with him."

"With him? With whom?" Suddenly, the girl looked at your hand, seeing the wedding ring. "Ohmilord!! I got married?!?! Who is it???" she screamed.

You smiled looking at her face. Shocked and almost scared.

"Sorry, I can't spill." You said with a small smile. "You'll live a few more years and you'll find out."

"Ugh... Now I'm going to live in suspense..."

"Don't worry. You will have a boyfriend who will later be your husband and you will be pregnant by him. It's nothing that terrible."

"I will be pregnant?! Are you pregnant?!" She looked at your belly.

"I am, but only recently."

"Should you use cursed items while pregnant? You know... Even Satoru knows that using it in a state where you don't know what's going to happen is inappropriate."

"Even Satoru?"

"Yes. Although I know he would probably do something irresponsible. Besides, what is he doing in the future?"

"He's still a sorcerer."

"He had a girlfriend? Wife? Kids?"

"Hmm..." You thought for a moment what to say. "Yes. He does."

"Oh..." The younger you mumbled sadly.

By the time you were 16, you had feelings for him.

Poor, you thought he had a wife and kids with some other woman.

Well, you didn't say it like you loved him very much.

So she thought your husband was someone else.

"Can you tell me what are you doing in the future? Or what will our relationship be like?"

"You care about him, don't you?"

"...Yes... You were me after all...

"You love him..."

"I... I-I..."

"All right. I know it is. After all, I was you." You laughed.

You saw a watch in your hand that suddenly appeared.

It showed you had two minutes left here.

Why when you go to the future you get hours to stay there and when you go to the past you get minutes?

Because it's already happened, and you've already been through it.

Therefore, you have less time.

You had 12 minutes. It was enough for you to talk to her.

"I have little time. But I can tell you that our relationship is still close." You told her.

And the moment you had a few seconds left, you showed her your hand with the wedding ring engraved with his name.

You don't know if she saw it, but you gave her a quick signal of what she might expect before you disappeared.

Straight to the living room to be grabbed by Satoru who immediately started hugging you, saying that he wanted to be there too and now you have to wait for the watch's energy to recharge.

[thebluestbluewords]

Rise of Red (princess status pending)

“Where are we?” Chloe asks, wide-eyed goggling at the buildings around her like she’s never seen a castle before. 

Okay, it’s not like Red’s seen a castle like this one before either, but still. She’s at least making an effort to fit in. 

“More like when are we?” Red shoots back. “We’re right where we were before the pocketwatch took us back. It’s a time machine, not a fucking teleportation device.” 

Chloe frowns. She’s cute when she looks confused, not that Red cares. “That seems improbable. I mean, what are the odds that we’d be standing in exactly the same spot where we left from…fifty years ago?” 

“My mom’s not that old.” 

“Your mom built the whole castle in wonderland,” Chloe says, frowning. “She was queen when Lady Alice visited for the first time, which was over thirty years ago. According to our history books—“ 

Red can’t help the laugh that tears out of her. “Hah! Your history books?” 

Chloe’s frown deepens. “What’s wrong with our history books?” 

“For one thing, they totally ignore the Wonderland War.” Red snaps, keeping her voice low and dangerous, both because it makes Chloe lean closer to hear her, and because she is not going to cause a time travel incident by making any of these pre-Auradon princess types think that they should instigate the Great War a few years early. “And they say that you guys are the source of all the goodness and light in the world—“ 

“Wonderland didn’t exactly keep their hands clean either when it came to the villains—“ 

“We were the villains!” Red hisses, so loudly that Chloe flinches back. “We were part of the villainous uprising that led to you people locking up our friends, and we didn’t want to be pushed back into tweedletown or stuck with my mother for a queen, but those were the only two options you gave us!” 

“The books say that Wonderland chose to secede from the United States of Auradon,” Chloe says, meeting Red’s glare straight on. “I know that books can be wrong, but while we’re here, we’re in a time before any of that. We need to remember that history as we know it hasn’t happened yet, so we need to be careful not to change too much and risk creating a time distortion so big we can’t get home.” 

“Home. Where my mother is staging a coup.” 

“Where my mother is a prisoner waiting for her beheading,” Chloe shoots back. “Unless you want to let things play out like that again, we need to get moving and figure out how to convince your mother not to be….” 

“Herself?” 

“I was going to say a tyrant.” Chloe says delicately. “But I suppose that works too.” 

Red throws her arm out in a sweeping Red Court gesture towards the road ahead of them. Her fingers slip automatically into the shape of a heart, and she flips them back into a rude gesture instead. She’s not giving her mother the satisfaction, even from fifty-odd years away. “Lead the way, princess.” 

Chloe makes a face that’s distinctly un-princess-y. “That’s the other thing we need to decide on before we find your mom. I can’t be the princess of Charmington here. Charmington doesn’t exist yet.” 

Red scoffs. Of all the stupid things to be concerned about, of course her roommate is concerned about her own royal heritage before she’s supposed to be born. “Your dad’s still a prince. You can be his cousin, or something. I’d never,” she puts as much sarcasm as possible into the word, just in case Chloe really is as dense as she’s acting. “Deny you the royal treatment you so clearly deserve, princess.” 

Chloe’s expression is so flat that she might as well be a flounder. “I meant that you cant call me a princess because telling everyone that I’m the heir to a country that doesn’t even exist yet is the fastest way I can think for us to get thrown in jail for espionage, if not outright treason. That is, unless you’d rather be sent to the madhouse instead?” 

“Madhouses aren’t real. They’re a story that my mom made up to get those stupid hatters off her case.”

Chloe’s face falls even further. “They’re real. And that’s where we’ll be going if we don’t have a good cover story for who we are and why we’re here.” 

Red shrugs. “You’re the one with the history books. Make something up.” 

Chloe grins. 

Oh, no. 

[cupoftaae]

Growing Pains (KTH drabble)

Summary- You and Taehyung discover the struggles of parenthood as you take on the task of raising your 3 month old daughter, Kiyomi.

Warnings- mentions of postpartum struggles and attachment issues

word count- 1.6k

A/N- Hi guys! so after Ladybug got so much love I decided to make a another drabble to continue their storyline, this takes place months after their daughter is born. Hope you enjoy it!

Taehyung woke up to the sounds of crying. He sat up and looked over at his clock, it was 4:32am, and you werent in the bed.

Groaning, he pushed the covers back and began walking down the hall into his daughters room, finding you on the floor with her in your arms.

"Im sorry we woke you, go back to bed" you whisper, noticing the sudden appearance of your husband in the room. "are you guys alright?" he asked, ignoring your previous demand as he walked further in and sat next to you, eyes still sleepy from the abrupt awakening.

You sigh and gently rock the small baby in your arms as she wailed, becoming frustrated yourself. "she wont stop" you exhale, finally looking at taehyung. "maybe shes hungry?" he suggested, moving his hand to wipe away his baby's tears.

"She wont latch...so I dont think she is...I also changed her and put her in a lighter onesie incase she was too hot" you gesture to the new outfit on Kiyomi, of course taehyung smiled at the ladybug printed fabric.

"let me see her" he whispered, gently taking the frail 3 month old out of your arms. "Hi baby, you giving mommy a hard time again?" he kissed all over her face before pulling her against him, her tiny head resting on his shoulder as his hand rubbed her back.

"im so tired" your hands run over the front of your face, knowing you return to work tomorrow afternoon and not only would you be exhausted, you would be missing your baby.

Since Kiyomi was born, youve been home every single day making sure she was taken care of, of course Taehyung has been an excellent help as well, and you probably wouldnt have been able to do this without him, yet at the same time you couldnt express your fears of going back to work after maternity leave....you didnt want to let him down or make him feel like you didnt trust him. It wasnt ever about trust, it was about going hours and hours without being able to make sure your daughter was okay. What happens if she needs mommy? What happens if she starts to cry and he cant differentiate it from a hunger cry, dirty diaper cry, or a tired cry?

"go back to sleep, i'll take care of her" he yawned and stood up, one hand reaching down to help you to your feet.

"I cant sleep" you sigh, walking over to rearrange her crib and the blankets. "cant we just keep her in our room tonight? she can sleep in our bed" you finish.

Taehyung gently rocked her around as he paced the room, the small cries slowing down. "baby I thought we agreed its better for her to be in her own room, she is gonna be too dependant on us.....and why cant you sleep? you just said you were tired-"

"because I have a list of things I need to do Taehyung!" you turn around, "I have to pump because she didnt want to eat, and I need to make sure you have enough milk for tomorrow, plus extra just incase, and then I need to put my work clothes in the washer because I forgot, then dry them, and you know what?" you throw your hands up as you walked over and took your daughter "shes only 3 months old, theres no harm in having her in our bed, who cares! she wont even remember anyways" you scoff and walk out of the room.

You didnt mean to snap on him like that, in fact you felt bad as soon as you left her bedroom. Taehyung is a great dad and an even better husband, but you still found yourself unable to stay calm when the list of things piled on, you didnt know how everything was going to go tomorrow, and you were stressed.

"hey...Im sorry if I said anything to upset you" he whispered as he finally walked into your shared bedroom, his daughter now asleep on the comforter as you sat and tried to pump milk.

sighing, you turn to look at him. "I didnt mean to act like that...you didnt do anything wrong, im just on edge"

He slowly walked over and sat on the bed next to you, careful of the sleeping baby in front of him. "whats going on, sweetheart?"

You didnt respond right away, instead you shrugged and looked down at Kiyomi, feeling those stupid tears resurface to your eyes again. "talk to me angel..." he rubbed your back.

"I dont want to leave her" you spoke in a choked whisper, wiping your cheek quickly. "What do you mean?" he calmly responded.

"Work tomorrow, I dont want to go....I havent been away from her since she was born. Ive had 3 months but im not ready." you take a breath, gathering your thoughts. "I went to the supermarket yesterday to buy dinner by myself, and almost had a panic attack because I realized she wasnt with me"

"my love, its okay to feel like this you know?" he rubbed your back softly, his chest tightening upon hearing your struggles. "sounds like you might be experiencing some separation anxiety,"

"I wanna work from home" you protest, shaking your head. "I cant leave her, and Its not about you not being a good parent- because you are so good, probably better than me" you chuckle lightly, "I just need it for myself....I need to see her. I spent 9 months taking care of her, I knew where she was at all times, and now that shes actually here I get so worried something will happen"

"i know sweetheart, I know" his hand ran through your hair as you spoke, "If you really want to look for a job that allows you to work from home, i'll support you all the way, you know that....but I really think its important to go tomorrow at least, to tell them about whats going on"

You leaned against your husband, glad he was supporting you in such a vulnerable moment. "why cant I just call them tomorrow?" you sniffle

"because I think its good to just go in, the smaller steps you take, even if its just a day, will probably make things easier for you."

"mm....just tomorrow?" you look at him

"Just tomorrow, then you dont ever have to see that place if you dont want to, you can stay home and i'll pamper you both"

You giggled and shook your head, "no, I wanna work....just not outside the house"

"and I support that" he gently lifted your chin so he could kiss you.

You smiled and kissed him back, watching him carefully as you pulled away.

"You are so beautiful, I swear motherhood made you even more attractive than you already were" he grinned

you raised an eyebrow, looking down at yourself before looking at him, "are you kidding me? I have a suction cup attached to my tit right now, and my hair needs to be washed....dont even try to say I look good" you shook your head as you noticed the bottle was full, taking off the pump and pulling your shirt down as you crewed the cap on.

"Ah you dont see yourself how I see you, the fact you go through so much for our baby is what is beautiful to me, and just for the record, you could never shower again and i'd buy all the nose plugs in the world just so I could be near you and call you cute"

"shut uppppp" you whine and lean against the pillow, "thanks though....fatherhood looks good on you"

"now thank you, but we both can tell that its not physically" he laughed and stood, putting his hands on his belly. "sympathy weight" he patted his stomach, making you laugh.

"Hey, I didnt do that to you!" you retort

"Yes! you insisted that I eat with you every time you had a craving, and what did I do?"

"ate with me" you smile

"yeah, except you were eating and it went to the baby" he chuckled, "mine went to my stomach area"

"hey I think dad bods are sexy" you nudge him

he rolled his eyes jokingly and wrapped you in his embrace, both of you looking down at your finally sleeping daughter.

"next kid, you deal with those cravings alone" he teased, hand gently squeezing you closer.

You smiled brightly at his words, you couldnt handle another child right now, especially with your current mental state, but you knew in the next 3 years you would enjoy having a second baby.

"thats not gonna be for a while bubs, relax" you patted his thigh

"what if she gets lonely" he looks at you

"are you serious" you laugh, squishing his face "shes 3 months, plus she has us, and tannie. I promise she will be well entertained until we have another kid"

He huffed and slouched down, making you giggle.

He sat up and grabbed his phone, turning the video on as he began filming his sleeping baby. "I havent recorded anything in a bit, well thats a lie, I recorded her yesterday when I was playing airplane and she ended up puking on me"

Your giggles are heard off camera before he faces it towards you "Oh its funny huh?"

"shh, youre gonna wake her" you quickly cover the camera to hide yourself before he continues to ramble on about your baby. He's been doing this since that day you both found out you were expecting Kiyomi, and it still warms your heart to see a man so in love with his creation of life.

He was your rock, and she was your ladybug, and perhaps you would be okay after all.

[core4writes]

Hiii... can you maybe write a story were y/n is very reckless and always get herself in danger and colby have enough of that and like fuck her roughly cause he is frustrated with her then later break down and admit his fear of losing her ..... idk if you are writing though and if you are comfortable with the whole thing.... feel free to ignore it if you don't!

Either way thank you!❤️

i will be glad to do it! i have never written smut before so i think ill just skip that part till i get better at it.

Reckless

warning: sad ig, mentions of drug substance, mentions of alcohol

stuff in bold are flashbacks

pairing: Colby Brock x reader fem pronouns



y/n pov:

this past week all i have been doing is going to party to party with kat and stas, and everyday i am greeted with a hangover. i wake up in bed today with a deadly headache, the sun shining in my face. i pull the blankets hoping to decrease the aggravating pain in my head, the blankets were ripped off of me. "No more." i heard colby voice and open my eye slightly.

"what do you mean no more?" with confusion i sit up, colby is still staring at me with anger. i can just tell when he is angry, he breathes  more heavy. "No more partying, i have had enough." i look at him with a sly smile "what did i do this time? oh wait did i throw up on you again? sorry if i did." i laugh it off.

"im serious y/n. do you remember nothing that happened last night?" he points at me "you could have died."

flashback 

me, stas, kat, sam and colby were at the las Vegas bar called 'XS Nightclub' the hot spot for partying. i down my 9th shot of vodka with kat and stas and we went out into the dance floor, sam and colby stay at the bar watching us.

third person pov:

colby leaned over to sam "do you see a change in y/n?" sam wanted to say no i mean y/n is one of his close friends she will never change, but he didnt want to lie to his best friend. "yeah dude, but if she is happy-" sam was cut off by colby "y/n didnt even like alcohol but now look at her, downing it like its nothing." colby sighs

sam and colby looks at y/n on the dance floor, y/n swings her hips to the music. someone tapped her on her shoulder, "excuse me, where are the bathrooms?"

y/n can not hear over the loud music "what? oh, its over there let me show you." y/n pointed to the entrance "okay." the tall girl says and then they just disappear.

colby thinks nothing of it because he trust his girlfriend, "man, i need another shot."

hours go by and stas and kat come back to sam and colby, "guys, we cant find y/n." colby looked at kat and stas with eyes wide open and his face went pale. "wait, what do you mean you cant find her she was just with you." stas looked at colby, "yeah but she went to show some girl the bathroom and never came back."

sam, colby, kat and stas looked everywhere for y/n. they didnt find her till they saw her outside the club walking down the street. "y/n, where are you going." colby runs up to y/n, "im going to the gas station im hungry." she said whiny.

"we are going home." colby says

end flashback

y/n pov:

"oh... im sorry." my voice quieted down

"sorry? your sorry? you could have gotten hurt, like kidnapped or hit by a bus." colby voice yelled.

"well im here now so." i said

"im scared of you leaving me okay? you change into this party animal and im scared of just losing you, the old you. And you don't talk to me about your problems anymore you're just so reckless. I need you,I need you to be here with me physically and mentally." colbys voice cracked.

The silence was heavy for minutes.

"I didn't know you felt like that. "Should've told me about that sooner I would understand." I say.

Colby crawls on the bed next to me, sobbing."I just don't wanna lose you." colby cries into my chest. "i know baby i know."

"i love you."

it was a little bit rushed at the end, my first writing piece ever hope I didn't do bad.💕

[salempie]

Hi! Thank you so much for the feedback about my Elka art! I really appreciate it. And now the question : What would Elka's mental world look like? I was wondering what you could suggest about this. It always seemed to me that the symbol of her world would be a mirror

Well actually my boyfriend and I had an idea for Elka's brain world we called "Elka's Ever-after!" I need to write down some big document for all the ideas we had about it but for now [should put a tw for like, idk, I think Elka would be an alcoholic as an adult. Theres a vague reference to that here? I mean Bobs Bottles exists so--]

It was a little 50s sitcom-type world, all in black-and-white and such, complete with it's own laugh track! Mostly it would be a representation of the "perfect" life she had always wanted for herself (the one she had pictured in all her years chasing after Nils and their predestined relationship (that as a child she conveniently ignored meant it was doomed to fail)), all with its own dandy Nils stand in, "The Husband," and their two darling regret children. The "plot" of the brain world (in the sense that, if someone were to go into it the "goal" of the world in order to "fix her issues") would be to disrupt this, although perfect, entirely fabricated life Elka, or rather "The Housewife," had made for herself.

The Housewife is stuck in a miserable marriage she pretends is perfect, but the signs are there. The cigarettes, the empty bottles, the constant misfortune written on the calendar on the fridge, the non-stop bad news on the television and the radio and the newspapers. It's obvious things are bad. But Elka is too proud, and far more than that, too resigned to what she sees as her predestined fate to even attempt to change anything. So she just tries to make sure everyone else thinks it's all as perfect as she always told them it would be, even in her own brain world.

She cant change the miserable future her visions showed to her, so why bother even trying? She feels helpless. Her visions are more in control of her own life than she is. There's a lot that I'm skipping for the sake of not rambling on and on, but the end of her world, I think, would be set in her childhood home (rather than the "perfect" home The Housewife lives in.) A little child Elka sitting in the dark of her living room in front of her TV, playing her first vision on loop. The start of all her issues, the beginning of the end of any control she felt over her life. It's mentioned she has a vision of a puppy getting run over in the Li-Po doc and I take that as being one of if not her first vision, so of course she's upset. Giving her the remote to the TV would be symbolically showing her that she is in control, that she doesn't have to just do whatever her visions say, that she has a choice in her life, that she doesn't have to just watch it all happen.

Heart! I could go a LOT into the intricacies of how it all plays out (and I will if you'd like but it would just be a written play-by-play of how I think going through the world would be (complete with bossfights!) from the perspective of Kitty and Franke since they're the ones going through her mind in my and my boyfriends Au!), with all the symbolism and whatnot, but this answer is already long enough.

All in all I have thought about this a lot (,'. Though I do think mirrors could really be a big thing for her. A lot of her issues, including not feeling in control, I also think would stem from her mother treating her precognition as a parlor trick. I think she would see a lot of her mother in herself (and father too for that matter. I figure Barney is the one who cheated (though mostly because of Mable's unhealthy obsession with bad predictions, not that that is an excuse) and I also figure he and Elka were close due to them both being psychics and having their unique precognition. So him leaving would put a lot of strain on her.) and hate that, so mirrors could be a fantastic symbol of that.

[phyot]

hii! after checking out your blogs i cant help but felt mesmerized!! its all so well-written:D may i request reader wearing a skirt x xiao/scaramouche(separate) where they were riding the escalator but theres creeps behind reader.

what will they do? feel free to ignore!🤛:))

AWH THANK YOU🫶🏻

summary: you get on the escalator with your s/o and there r some creeps bothering you

character: xiao, scaramouche (seperate)

warnings: yeah well summary🧍, cursing

also this is not edited just so yk🫂

It was a hot Saturday afternoon and you desperately needed new clothes. You ran out of shorts and also because you felt confident today you decided to wear a skirt.

"Oh come on, please? It will be fun and ill buy you boba, what's better than that?" "fine" your s/I decided to tag along due to an extreme need for boba (at least I crave it all the time idk).

After shopping for new clothes as promised you went and got boba. Boba shop was on the first floor so you took the escalator to it. Unfortunately, there were also some people riding the escalator behind you and let's just say it wasn't a pleasant experience.

Xiao:

You were chattering about random stuff that happened to you that day and he wasn't paying attention until you suddenly stooped talking.

"Hey, guys check it out," said the guy behind you while pointing at you. "Oh my god, she's got a real package there, won't!" said another guy and all of them started laughing and pointing out more stuff about you and your appearance.

You were extremely embarrassed. You could feel stares burning in your back and thighs. Their 'compliments' really made you want to die. You were desperately trying to pull your skirt a bit lower which just made things worse.

Xiao noticed your struggle and gave you one of the new shirts that he recently bought. You took it, wrapped it around your waist, and mouthed a quick 'thank you'.

"Awh man, why did you do that?" "For real, don't ruin other people's fun man," xiao turned around and started spitting random insults at them: "Just. What the fuck is wrong with you, are you really spending your day in a random mall making women feel bad, embarrassed even? Get a fucking life."

The guy behind you scoffed and put his hands up, "right bro, it's not a big deal calm down, Jesus."

"just, fuck you."

You looked at xiao and gave him a small smile. He took your hand and walked towards the boba shop after the ride ended.

Scaramouche:

"You alright?" "Yeah, I'm terrific," you said and pulled your skirt a bit lower. He could sense a bit of sarcasm in your tone. "Is it true?" "Is what true?" "Those guys behind me keep making weird comments about my skirt and the way I look, like, is it too short? Why didn't you tell me at home, I could change it there," "What's up with you name, you look amazing in this skirt, I think it fits you perfectly..." "Thanks but they are making like, uh, different types of comments?"

He turned around and saw two guys behind you making weird hand gestures and laughing while looking at you.

"Hey! Cut it out," they both turned towards him. "Sorry what?" "Don't play dumb, you know what I'm talking about." "Oh, you're saying that complimenting people is a sin now? Damn sorry I didn't know. My bad."The other one was laughing hysterically.

Scaramouche was ready to continue that fight for ages but you stopped him: "Scara stop it, it's not a big deal. Just let it go." "Yeah, listen to her, it's not a big deal shortie,"

This was the breaking point for him. He punched the guy right in the face but gladly not hard enough for him to fall back. Gladly the ride has ended. You took scaramouches hand hurried in a different direction.

"You know I really should be mad at you for punching that guy but still I'm truly happy that you did. Thank you."

A/n: is this like super questionable? yup. am i still gonna post it? yup

[pretty-chaotic-world]

if my BPD can scream

1. I wish i could have a normal love... but no, my brain wants to worship every little detail of you until it drives me insane

2. sorry i pushed you away i felt abandoned and suicidal 

3. I’m sick of going to bed and knowing things won’t be better tomorrow 

4. I'll ask you thousands times if you really love, please don't get annoyed

5. I'll create "drama" and mishaps only to feel like I'm in home

6. i’m afraid that one day my anger will overshadow the little love i still have left for the world

7. I feel numb. No tears, no anger, nothing. Just going through the same day again and again. I would rather just sleep without waking up.

8. I'm so tired of everytime one small argument or inconvenience breaks out I want to end it and self destruct, it's so draining. 

9. I want to stop feeling anything and when i actually don't it breaks my heart but I can't cry it out.

10. "its all in your head" well duh where tf else is it gonna be??? in my fucking kidneys????

11. I am constantly between wanting people to care about me and wanting them not to so I can hurt myself without feeling guilty 

12. Psychiatrist told me there is no cure for bpd and I've to change myself. Well why cant they just let me die then?

13. Until you live with bpd you'll never know what it's like to be too much and not enough at the same time.

14. i know im constantly too much for everyone but sometimes i just want to be enough for someone

15. if he will leave me, my next diagnosis will be of "sociopath"

16. im so jealous of all the people who see him and touch him and talk to him every single day it should be me me me me 

17. oh I got my hair coloured. why? because I can't hurt myself anymore 

18. "you're so distant" because you can't handle my abandonment issues.

19. My younger self disappoint me a lot. like why were you begging people to stay in your life? ohh no worries I know the answer

20. I wanna throw a plate against the wall, stab a knife through my hand, destroy my laptop with a hammer, smash my door in with an axe and spray graffiti all over the walls of my room 

21. Why shouldn’t I be mad? Why can’t I just be angry and be allowed to feel it? Why can’t I burn everything down?

22. I have to watch my mouth every fucking second to make sure I don't destroy every relation I have coz apparently social life matters!!

23. Isnt it fucked up how he got away with every horrible thing he made me experience and I’m the one who has to live with myself feeling absolutely fucking worthless 

24. I don't deserve food and love. im a horrible person.

25. this is how my eating cycle goes

feeling weak coz i haven't ate anything -> eat -> purge -> feeling guilty after purging -> eat more -> feeling guilty after eating so much -> cry coz you don't know what's happening

26. the diagnosis makes me believe I'm not insane just lil emo ig!! NOOOO YOU'RE INSANE

27. “don’t let it bother u” baby i’m gonna be bothered by this for the next 10 years 

28. if I tell you I love you its equivalent to I can kill someone for you

29. Actually upon further inspection that shit really hurt my feelings 

30. I don't dive into insecurity anymore, i drown in self-loathe

31. i shut up in between group convo coz I know I'll talk invaluable shit and nobody really cares what I say until it's psychology class

32. "if you are fully aware of yourself, why do you keep acting like that?" slapping self awareness on top of bpd only grants the ability to watch yourself self-destruct straight from the vip section thats all it does literally

33. “Where do you see yourself in the future” building a cult for mentally ill people 

34. ofc I've a praise kind i was ignored as a child

35. I'm much better than I was before. you know why coz I don't to air now and don't see monsters walking by side all the time

36. No I don't want to self harm anymore I need to kill that fucking monster

37. Don't mind me, I'm just casually sabotaging all my positive relationships with negative delusions because my life doesn't feel real unless something dramatic and destructive is constantly occurring 

38. i don’t care i don’t care i don’t care (im going to sob my fucking eyes out)

39. “Stop making your disorder your personality” I have a fucking personality disorder for god sake

40. turning my mental illnesses into kinks and calling it the BDSM-5 

41. "destroy something precious while you're in rage" ohh yeaa and then I'll do that again and again 

42. what I hate most about my BPD is the fact that I have started doubting every emotion that I’ve ever felt in my life, whether it’s love, my grief through multiple traumas, or my anger, & it’s so saddening. It has actually led me to start questioning my reality.

43. if I need medication to stay alive, am I really meant to be here?

44. it's either be alone without 75% of my symptoms, or be with someone and display the most horrendous unstable awful version of myself. why do i have to choose between love & happiness or peace & stability?

45. That fucking bpd rage where everyone's voices makes you want to scream and every noise around you makes you want to sh and you're so mad you can almost feel the cuts everywhere 

46. getting worked up to the point of becoming physically ill (throwing up/stomach issues etc) because you felt rejected/abandoned by your favourite person  

47. i wish my trauma made me kind as everyone says but i’m becoming what i fear the most- a monster.

48. imagine getting diagnosed with a personality disorder and the only visible representation of that disorder is an animated horse man, a sociopathic sitcom character from philadelphia, and darth vader

[mrs-monaghan]

I think you don't understand the point here. Friends can hangout whenever they want..yes. couples don't need to spend every minute with each other...yes I agree. But that's not the point here. Point is jimin was going to ny the next day and jk..as u are saying jimin's boyfriend...was not with him bcz he was at the premiere with a guy friend who he's most shopped with and later on going for drinks till early morning... You say it or no but it's strange and clearly shows how jikook cant be real. Nobody wants a partner like that who can't even spend a day with you before you are going out of the country. You are not addressing the point here.

I sent you this ask..i was supporting you before on stormie matter but now you are doing the same thing. You keep talking but when someone asks you to address the exact point or something..you are not going to post their ask?? Or maybe you are going to block us too like she did before.great. you have nothing to say what point i made...so keep ignoring logical asks and stay delulu. But what jk did yesterday...it clears out all the confusion of him being a couple with jimin. He and jimin are not together.

How did u know I deleted your ask? 👀

I have only recently just started getting asks but when I used to only read posts I always use to sympathise with Jikookers who had to deal with you lot. Because you people are annoying, I'm sorry. I wish you would just pick a side and then move along. You have two options anon (and any other insecure Jikooker reading this) its either a) You become a proper Jikooker and join us with celebrating and supporting their love or b) Stop being a Jikooker and just enjoy BTS content. Stay away from Jikook support spaces and just ship them on the surface as that one duo u find adorable and cute.

There is no other option. This back and forth is ridiculous to me. Pick a side. Please. I beg you. Does this look like a broken couple to you?

No seriously, look at them. If you see two exes behaving like this I assure you they're still fucking. No cap. If my man behaved like that with his ex I would result to violence. I'm not even kidding he would catch these hands 👊🏽

An anon told me that u guys come to us to convince you that Jikook are still a couple and I'm starting to see that. But why is it so important to u that Jikook be together? Or not together for that matter? Why does it have to be black and white?

What JK did yesterday it clears out all the confusion of him being a couple with Jimin.

Okay I'm glad you have come to that conclusion. And that's okay. Now will this help you move on? Will u finally stop sending asks to Jikookers trying to disprove Jikook? I hope so. Because you can't be changing your mind next time Jimin tells JK he loves him on weverse. You're not allowed to change your mind when we see them together and they're all lovey dovey as usual. You're not allowed, I'm sorry. Pick a side anon, please.

I am not confused as to whether or not Jimin and JK are together and you can't hold that against me. I do not need regular Jikook content to believe they're still making out behind closed doors. I, know that just because I don't see it doesn't mean Jikook were not cuddling the night before JK left for the premiere. Just because we didn't get a photo of it, doesn't mean it didn't happen. My memory is intact and I remember how natural this looked.

So I deduced that this is something they do regularly. Just because I have no footage of it, doesn't mean that was the last cuddle or the last time they ever fell asleep together.

My memory is intact and so I remember the love confession that is GCFT. I haven't forgotten the lyrics to Letter. My memory is still good and the last 10 years are worth something to me. I won't throw away everything they have ever said and showed us because JK went to a premiere instead of staying home with Jimin who was flying out.

Nobody wants a partner like that who can't even spend a day with you before you're going out of the country.

You know this, how?? Ever since JK came back from the US we don't know that they haven't been together every day since. I, believe they're together so I know they made time for each other. I don't need to see it, to believe it. I delete these asks for a reason. You need proof in order to believe Jikook is real and that's messed up. U wanna be a shipper, fine go be a shipper. But stay away from supporters because we believe what we believe. And you don't have to see things my way. You don't believe Jikook are a couple, well and good. But leave me out of it. Please. I am happy to be delulu. You do you, and I'll do me.

Oh. FTR I don't block people. If someone has an issue with me they can block me themselves. I resent the accusation. 😒