#i know i have more but i can't think of them rn

[nightixx]

sooo I may be overlooking at things right now but hear me outt

After moon's dream/hallucinations or whatever the hell people wanna call this, I noticed a purple smoke (or idk the word but you understand) behind him

And many more thumbnails. We know that in the canon game (security breach), the virus is almost always represented by this color and with those rectangles + the aura. Now I'm not talking about vanny or idk, idc about her cuz this isn't about the canon game rn

I have many thoughts about this, because things happened before that and it could be related.

As I saw on some blogs (I can't find the one who wrote it but I know I've reblogged it), before ruin betrayed them, he said he wanted to infect ruin's virus into his own code to think like him which could be true since he really tried for weeks to think exactly like him and to have his informations. During his day off after his first breakdown after he saw old moon, sun was present the entirety of the episode, which isn't logic at all since it's MOON's day off not an episode of sun bringing food for 15 minutes ? Moon was alone in the house after a breakdown AFTER he tried to think like ruin AFTERR he said he wanted to inject the virus into himself. And strangely after that he started to act all nuts, maybe not just at the second episode but you can tell he went insane quickly, too quickly and it's too suspicious for me.

Back to the thumbnail, you can see thumbnails after thumbnails while scrolling on the channel that his aura gets more purple any time he's showing.

Now if we do the comparaison between ruin and moon reacting to the virus :

The virus accentuated ruin's personality into insanity. As we know, ruin is a melange between sun and moon. So we can say he was playful (sun's side) but with a kill code (moon's side) which made him a dangerous individual. He also lost his objective during the take over. Because yes ruin wanted to venge his friends but in the beginning he had the virus and it distracted him from his objective.

Now if we look at moon. The virus could have accentuated his personality (which makes him worse than old moon) and his goals (protecting his family, bringing solar back etc..). He's also losing his objective which is bringing solar of course. He doesn't know why he's doing it anymore.

I also remember when moon told Monty that he looked in his code and he found nothing. Kinda suspicious to me- he tended to lie back then too. I think he did really check his code to see if the virus was the cause of that. And of course when you add his poor mental state to begin with as he was grieving it doesn't help at all and makes things worse.

Anyways maybe it's my own paranoia talking rn but I just can't accept that all this insanity arc happened by Davis snapping his fingers

[wrightingdungeon]

Dear Diary

Evelyn and George, I love them so much.

ANGST! GET YOUR ANGST HERE!

POV Evelyn’s Diary - shes 19/20 RN - WILL HAVE TIME SKIPS - None of this is cannon beside pop pop blowing up - BTW George still blows himself up oop - Imagine getting snips of her Diary not the whole book - Im not sorry for how I end this - fight me

Today is Spring, 8, 1965.

While working in the clinic today, a miner came in, but he wasn't like the other miners. He almost dropped his cap taking it off while trying to introduce himself. His name is George, and he came in for an injury on his hand. The rope he was holding had slipped from his grip, causing a severe rope burn across his palm.

He apologized for tracking coal dust into the clinic, which no miner has ever apologized for before. I don't think their mothers explained how hard it is to get coal dust out of the bed sheets, but it's my job, so I shouldn't complain much. I just hope George will be okay. I told him he should inform his foreman that it's doctor's orders he not work until his hand heals completely.

Today is Spring, 12, 1965

The doctor was out of town today, having a call outside of town. The clinic ran as usual, although I had to tell some people to return tomorrow to see the doctor. Despite a few cases, today was a good day. Mr. George came back, and his hand has healed phenomenally. It still has a bit more healing to do, but it doesn't look like it will leave a bad scar.

I must admit, when I was holding his hand and inspecting his burn, I couldn't help but feel light-headed. George is not a bad-looking man, and his smile is so kind, His miner's cap always tosses his brown hair, and his eyes always have a twinkle in them. I’m afraid I’m a horrid nurse, feeling these things for someone in my care.

Today is Spring, 20, 1965.

George came by the clinic today. His hand looked better, but that wasn't the reason he came. He brought me a bundle of tulips, thanking me for all the care I had given him. I'm looking at them in my window right now, and I can't help but smile. He is such a kind man. I can't quite figure out how he knew what flowers I fancy, but does that matter? They are so beautiful.

I am sad, though, because George's hand has healed fully, and now he has no reason to come to the clinic. I should be happy—he's healed, and I did my job—but my heart aches knowing I won't see his smile or his twinkling eyes again. Like I said, I must be a horrid nurse.

Today is Summer, 4, 1965

I saw George again today. I was at the market shopping for dinner when I reached for a leek, and my hand touched his. His laughter is much more boisterous than his voice, which was a pleasant surprise. It's nice discovering things about him—he is like a book I don't want to put down.

He offered to cook me dinner as a proper thank you for helping him. I should have said no, but I said yes. Now, I'm sitting here, terrified to go to his home. I've never had anyone other than my mother cook for me. My heart is fluttering.

Today is Summer, 13, 1965

I have heard the number thirteen is unlucky, but I believe it to be lucky. This evening, I heard a knock at my door. It was George, dressed nicely with his hair neatly fixed. He handed me flowers and asked me out to a gridball game.

What do I wear? I want to impress George. I haven't been on a date before.

The date went so well! George's team won, and he was so happy. We got sorbet afterward to celebrate, and George took my hand in his as we walked. I really do believe the number thirteen is lucky.

Today is Summer, 28, 1965

It has been two weeks of me and George going steady, and it feels like a dream. When George finishes his shift in the mines, he comes to the clinic and walks me home. He is such a gentleman, nothing like the other miners I have met. Tonight was just magical. As George walked me to the door, I could tell something was off. His hands sweat when he is nervous, and I swear they were dripping.

He looked at me, his face as red as a beet, and asked if he could kiss me. His lips are soft and warm. It's embarrassing to admit, but his mouth does taste like cigarettes. Oh, I think I am in love, and I don't know what to do.

Today is Winter, 20, 1965

I can't believe it… George asked me out again today. He took me to the cliff to watch the sunset. He was sweating again and refused to look at me. When I asked him what was wrong, he just caged up further. I thought he was breaking up with me, but then he grabbed me as I got up to leave. His words fumbled over each other, and he almost fell over as he rushed to his knee.

George proposed to me. He told me I was the most beautiful woman he had ever met and that he couldn't stop thinking about me since he burned his hand with that rope. I'm so excited—I'm going to be George's wife soon. I just wish Mother was still with me so she could see this.

Today is Fall, 14, 1970

I can't sleep. George had an accident today at the mines. It was terrible; they had to rush him to the city. The doctor sent me home, saying I was a wreck. I can't stop crying, picturing him covered in blood and bruises on the operating table. Someone said he dropped dynamite. Please, Yoba, don't take my George. After losing my parents, he's all I have. I can't bear to be alone again. He's my everything—the love of my life. The house feels empty without him. Every corner holds memories of him, and I can't imagine life without him. Yoba, you've always answered my prayers. Please, I was so alone after Mother and Father passed, please don't take him from me as well.

Today is Spring, 2, 1971

They finally allowed George to come home from the hospital, albeit in a wheelchair. But that doesn't matter to me. What matters is that he's home and on the mend. It's a new chapter for both of us, one filled with challenges and uncertainties. Sometimes, George can be a bit rude, but I can see the fear in his eyes.

I made a promise to stand by him no matter what: for better or worse, in sickness and in health, till death do us part. And I intend to keep that promise. I'll be there for George, caring for him and cherishing our time together, no matter what lies ahead.

Today is Winter, 2, 1976

This is a happy day! Me and George weren't sure I could become pregnant, but I am! We are so excited to see our child. George has been working in the nursery non-stop, making sure he can care for our baby, not allowing that wheelchair to stop him. I have decided on two names: Clara for a daughter and Coy for a son. I don't care what we have; I know they will be perfect.

Today is Summer, 10, 1977

Clara is perfect. With George's rich brown hair and my green eyes, she's a sight to behold. Despite her small stature, her eyes hold the same glimmer of curiosity as her father's. I know she will cause all kinds of trouble as she grows up just like her father.

As I watch George cradle her with such gentleness, his protective gaze never leaving her, and the tears of love that well up in his eyes as he whispers soothing words to her, I'm reminded once again of how blessed I am to have him by my side. In moments like these, it's crystal clear that I've married the most wonderful man.

Today is Summer, 13, 2000

I knew the number thirteen was lucky. Today, our grandson Alex was born. As I held him in my arms, I couldn't help but notice how much he resembled his mother, right down to the tiny button nose that mirrored hers when she was born. George was worried about Clara, complaining that everyone was here to see just Alex and not his baby girl. He has always been such a good father; he will be the best grandfather as well.

Looking at my family as it has grown, I’ve gone from an empty home after my parents passed, to a husband, a daughter, and now a son-in-law and a beautiful grandson. I love my family dearly and can't wait for the years ahead of us.

Fall, 16, 2004 This page is heavily tear stained

We took Alex for the day taking him to the fair as Clara wanted him to experience it. I can't believe we got lucky enough to have Alex… George's scream echoes in my mind… Did he scream with that pain when he was blown up?

We thought the phone call was Clara telling us that they would be late picking up Alex. The phone call shattered our hopes—it was the Zuzu Highway Patrol delivering the tragic news. Clara and her husband are gone… Victims of a drunk driver on the wrong side of the road. They didn't survive.

But we have Alex…. We have to tell our four-year-old grandson he can't go home anymore… He can't see his Mother or Father ever again

Yoba, why didn't you shield them?

[shinynewboots]

Hazbin Hotel Characters as Medical Specialties

Charlie: Pediatrics

You're telling me can't imagine Charlie with Bluey stickers in her pocket and saying "oh I see a dog in your ear. Woof!" When using an otoscope on a child with an ear infection? Be so for real rn

Vaggie: Emergency Medicine

This woman thrives in chaos, she grew up on a battefield. The ED is the Wild West of medicine and Vaggie thrives under the constant stress and variety

Vaggie: "what do you mean you were woodworking while drinking, are you fucking stupid"

Vox: Nephrology

Okay, okay this one is less based in personality and more based in the fact that I need to see a pissing competition between Vox and Alastor (as a cardiologist) about fluid status and renal function

Vox: *decreases lasix dosage in a patient with poor renal function*

Alastor: *punches Vox bc that patient is also fluid overloaded and has heart failure with a reduced ejection fraction*

Velvette: Dermatology

Listen you can't tell me that she didn't have amazing skin when she was alive. I can see her moving more towards the cosmetic side of dermatology with occasional biopsy or Mohs bc who doesn't love a procedure every once in a while

Cherri: ICU/Crit Care

Like Vaggie, Cherrie also thrives in chaos and things in the ICU can go from 0 to 100 in less than a minute. I also feel like she would have pretty good empathy and separation of work and home to be able to not let the job get to her too much

Angel: Psych

This just feels perfect to me, more based on my own experience but everyone I've met in Psych is kind while also being the coolest person you've ever met. I also think Angel would really be able to empathize with his patients based on his own history with addiction. He really likes to listen and offer support and advice.

Alastor: Cardiothoracic surgeon or Cardiologist (to get into a pissing contest with Vox about fluid and sodium)

Look, I know Al is like the perfect surgeon. He's intimidating, meticulous, and calculating. And I don't disagree, I think he would thrive as a CT surgeon...however, there's just something about him arguing with the nephrologist that just gives me the giggles

Lucifer: Internal Medicine

Listen, he's done it all and seen it all. He will spend hours rounding because he just wants to make sure he gets everything right (he's also avoiding going home alone but that's a different story). He also loves working with medical students and will give rousing lectures on first-line antihypertensive and diabetes medications (while also getting all of the students and residents names wrong).

Lute: OBGYN

Listen, I love Lute but if I knew her in real life she would intimidate me so badly. Much like the OBGYN attendings I worked with. She's amazing at her job and beloved by her patients for her blunt yet realistic recommendations, but in her L&D room or operating room, that is her domain and there is no deviation from that. Medical students and residents should exercise caution, but she will teach them the most out of any rotation

Adam: Orthopedics

This man is an ortho bro if I've ever see one. He is the attending who will pimp medical students on the playlist he has playing in the OR instead of the surgery in front of them. (What do you mean you don't know what artist this is? It's the fucking Eagles. Go home and study up, we're playing Led Zepplin tomorrow.)

Niffty: Pathology

Listen I have no explanations for this one. It just felt perfect, tbh

Husk: Anesthesia

This man is like every anesthesiologist I've ever met. He is there stereotype and sits behind the current with his sudoku in hand. Don't let that fool you, this man has knowledge and skill and is not afraid to use. The second your patient starts de-sating or coding, he's the one you wanna listen to

Rosie: Family Medicine

Rosie is the picture-perfect family medicine attending. Kind, empathetic and offers great advice. From cradle to grave, she's got you covered with primary prevention and screening and will be there for you for whatever comes next

Lol this is meant in good fun, so there are a few stereotypes about the different specialties and a lot of it is based on my own experiences on rotations. Let me know what you guys think. I know I missed some characters so let me know if y'all want me to come up with more.

[cardentist]

(Note I'm seeing this through lens of being horribly ill and struggling with health providers rn but)

I never saw it as an addiction metaphor I saw but how disabled people are denied aid and stuff because its 'wrong' and you 'should just be able to exist without it'.

But 'it hurts me to see you using cane/meds/wheelchair'

So it made sense to me that yeah he'd feel great using it but also feel horrible guilty

Context: [Link]

I didn't get into this in the original post because I was worried I wouldn't be able to word it right (in part because I haven't finished my relisten, and in part because this is More than just meta about a story I like and I didn't want to say anything ignorant).

BUT I'm absolutely glad that you're bringing this up.

because the truth is that my Other problem with the discussion about monsterhood in the magnus archives as addiction (in holding characters morally accountable for being monsters because they "should" be able to just Choose not to do monstrous things if they were good people) is that it Is accurate to how people treat addicts, and that's a bad thing when people parrot it without realizing that.

because the truth is, addicts often Do need their addiction to survive. medically, emotionally, or just. You Know. because addiction often means you can't just cut cold turkey without major consequences (consequences that, to be clear, Can Kill You). and they Are often treated poorly by the people around them for not just being able to Do Better as if anyone could be expected to do "better" in their situation.

when ""better"" means being in pain, when ""better"" is unlivable without the necessary support to Make it bearable.

and this Absolutely crosses over with ableism. in real life And in the show.

you don't Need to be an addict for someone to treat you like you're immoral for needing aid they don't. though I think it'd be a mistake to talk about it without Also keeping addiction in the conversation, because it's not right when people do it to addicts either.

needing aid to survive And being an addict aren't mutually exclusive, and that's what I meant when I said my last post was In Conversation with the addiction metaphor.

jon's situation being a mirror (in many ways, it's not an exact one to one of course) with addiction doesn't mean that he's Less deserving of compassion or that his situation was somehow his own fault, it means that we should be taking that compassion and understanding of his situation and Apply That to the real people who are also deserving of those things.

we Watched jon be stripped of his own agency and forced into a position where he could Only be a monster or die, and in response many people have said that he should've just Chosen not to be, as if the choice is Reasonable. as if asking him to starve or die is Reasonable.

and of course, I'm not qualified to speak about addiction in detail, but it's just something that's sat wrong with me for years. the Show's use of addiction as a metaphor works for me because of the empathy and humanity it's Meant to show to addiction. but the fandom's reception to that messaging isn't. always stellar.

and I don't think people necessarily do it on purpose, but I Do wish there was more of an awareness of it. how it might come across, you know?

[forgottenarias]

just some nonsense about aria i rambled about to get it out of my brain, i guess?

idk what this is but once again i went off on a tangent abt aria thanks to some influence from arthur ;) [honestly why can't i deep dive on all my characters like this rn]

Thinking about Aria pre conquering and her previous attachments-- I'd contemplated if she had some sort of tragic backstory, like there was a knight she'd sort of formed a bit of an attachment to leading up the invasion and he was killed in battle or smth along those lines, but I think her whole sense of being was SO wrapped up in being-- i'm not going to say Eilia's right hand necessarily bc i don't think she was doing tons of like... talking about policy or military issues or anything, but an important part of her life as the queen of Astaira. it sort of lead me to realize I don't think she's really had much in terms of romantic notions/courting/etc in her past? Part of that I think was just who she was-- pretty quiet and reserved and probably hiding somewhere w/ Aoife at social gatherings whenever possible! I remember Kate and I joked asp about the two of them having sort of useless husbands who just did their own thing while the women ran the country-- I don't think having a USELESS husband was her plan but she def sort of imagined a union/partnership (weirdly I don't think romance was playing into this vision of the future for her, despite the fact I think she's very much a closeted romantic!) husband who was intelligent, scholarly, and had his part in the running of Astaira-- so while she never imagined her sister would try to set up a political marriage for her, she def always assumed if/when that happened it would be something that made sense for Astaira. It was all very practical and sort of in line with that idea that Staffords are servants of Astaira. So she'd probably end up with the one who wasn't the worse and, if not at some point feeling SOME sort of romantic affection for him, at least they could be friends of sorts and share common interests have have children who, of course, would then be tasked with helping the crown and continuing the cycle on and on.

which i'm now realizing, sort of like his fear that no one will care for/love/be loyal/etc to him for just forHIM, Aria just never allowed herself to think that would be possible but, again, in a practical way?! like obviously everything goes back to what is best for astaira & helping her sister & carrying on the work of the stafford family, etc. (also i don't know if eilia realized that was sort of her worldview? i think its not anything she'd openly discuss with her sister honestly...)

BUT NOW there's this GUY who is almost in every way the antithesis of who she imagined herself ever being drawn towards-- like, if this were a bad early 2000's teen movie, she'd be the head of the debate team and he'd be the captain of (insert sport here) and WHY would they EVER even talk to each other?! haha! but then obvi she's seeing this different side of him that she expected to be there-- plus clearly SHE'S having some sort of affect on him and his thought process thanks to all their walks and talk/arguments ;) I think that's not something she's ever HAD before outside of her friendships (and while there is some sort of version of friendship there clearly its something else, what with the whole conquering/captor/flirt thing that's happening) and she just... likes how this is progressing? i think at first it was a "oh great-- more fuel for my fire of trying to worm my way into the good graces of the new regime and sow discontent from within!" but now she's making this real human connection and its scary and its annoying and its making her have all of these thoughts and see things as not black & white and she HATES that but also she is invested entirely now? and she may not have even realized it atp?!

all that being said there are still these little doubts that flair up-- which i think is sometimes part of the reason she reacts so angrily/aggressively at times (bc as we've discussed emotions are hard! don't think abou them in a healthy way!) I DO think every time she allows herself to think about "what is this connection, where is it going, what does it mean?" part of her is like "you're over complicating this-- there's probably some version of you in every castle/town/whatever this guy stops at w/ his deranged dad and you are NOT special and this is NOT different!" and i think some of that may be reinforced post Amira's Terrifying Tea Party when she figures out smth was happening w/ Eithne and she's like "oh okay, so that's his country lady he probably walks around w/ having some version of the same conversation!" (honestly the pair of them both having versions of 'oh, i thought this was something, guess its not..' is...so perfect) and she's like 'im obviously the lady entertainment when he's stuck in the castle!'

But then there are those moments where is DOES seem different and its enough to keep her coming back and trying to figure it out! i think hes right sometimes abt how she feels-- there were def moments where she's like "i want to hurt him, he deserves this, he could have stood up to his father and stopped this if he cared!" but i do think those have subded bc she realizes, again, this is not black and white and he actually has things he has to consider that SHE would consider, too! --namely his family!

plus, adding to that, there's everything I said about her realizing the manipulation is working-- i think she's confused if its working bc of ACTUAL feelings/emotions or if its working because he's kinda dumb and is just easily lead-- deep down she KNOWS its option one, hence why she feels the guilt about potentially doing something that would hurt him! and then adding in a rather, i think, fundamental shift in their views towards themselves/each other with his SHOCKINGLY DEEP AND INTROSPECTIVE confession about his views on his possible fate! i think beyond the whole "holy crap!" of the moment, it resonated w/ her in an unexpected way bc she's grappling with who she going to be in the world now that her whole purpose (helping Eilia as she rules Astaira!) has been taken away and while I think she's desperately trying to fill that void w/ her mission to save the guardians (also can we talk about the amount of pressure she is putting on HERSELF with this? oof), in the event there isn't a catastrophic event caused by the fall of the guardians, she doesn't know what her future is? is she stuck in this castle the rest of her life? does roderick finally off her when he's fed up with astaira being a problem? its not necessarily the same as arthur w/ his sole purpose in life to be emperor for his fate/his family's fate, but i think she sees some sort of connection there as well.

but now here we are and i realized that she's processing these emotions (poorly) on top of the 'you're a bastard, surprise!' announcement + amira's tea party so she's probably just... mad at arthur for reasons that aren't his fault + maybe has been ignoring him for awhile now? bc emotions & she doesn't want to hurt him & his father hurt her & did i mention... the emotions?

also if anyone made it this far WHY and I"M SORRY.

[possamble]

What are your headcanons about Marcille's mom if you have any? It's interesting that what drew Donato to her was cause she lived the history he studied, or that was said somewhere at least. She must've had an interesting life.

so this was going to be just a normal answer but then I realized I have a Lot of Things To Say. so here goes, a compilation of what we know for a fact from the canon, what I've extrapolated from the visual cues and details, and my theories based on all of that.

Things we know for a fact about Marcille's mother because they were explicitly stated in the manga and supplemental materials:

She was a court mage for a Tall-man kingdom at the southern part of the Northern Continent

Donato, a court historian, fell in love with her because she had lived through the history he was studying, and he courted her for 17 years (age 15 to 32) before getting married

She was a cheerful person who rarely showed extreme emotion and took things as they came

She always cooked a huge meal for Marcille on her birthdays

She remarried a gnome after Donato's death and a short distance away from Marcille's childhood home

Pipi, Marcille's pet bird, was actually older than Marcille and originally belonged to her mother (bird died at 62)

She was extremely heartbroken when Donato died and ultimately ended up instilling a deep fear of mortality in Marcille with her words

the only time she showed extreme emotion in front of her family was when Donato could no longer eat his favourite dish near the end of his life.

She scolded Marcille for being cruel to ants (implying she can have a stern side when needed)

Things that are explicitly shown but mostly through visual cues

She has a very distinctive style of dress always involving a ribbon choker (mirroring Marcille's habit of always wearing a matching choker with any of her outfits that don't cover her neck)

She was almost stereotypically good at housekeeping and traditionally "wifely" things (very frequently depicted wearing an apron or doing some domestic chore when not at work, seems to have been an avid cook).

She knits? (also, note the affectionate smile as she's looking at Donato and Marcille reading a book together in the full panel)

She was as excited for Marcille's milestones as Donato was.

She didn't tell Marcille much about elven food

(there are a couple things that this panel in particular implies:

She lived a good deal of her life (if not being born and raised) in a mainly elven country in the West, implied by her knowing enough of an elven region's cuisine to prefer Tall-man food over it

seems to have a pretty carefree and casual demeanour overall, if this is how she replied to Marcille asking her about it (sounds like she never gave her culinary preferences that much thought to begin with)

slightly related to number 2, it seems like she and Marcille had a fairly casual parent-child dynamic (especially in comparison to the Toudens' memory of their father)

(local elf tastes Italian food once and never goes back))

However, she seems a lot more... serious in most of the other times we see her? Almost like the very stereotypical archetype of a graceful elf.

Subsequent conclusions about her personality:

Usually pretty carefree and cheerful at home, has been a loving and attentive parent throughout Marcille's childhood (while not being so doting that she didn't discipline Marcille).

Slightly more conjectural theories on her personality:

Had a much more graceful and professional personality at work, which would explain the more serious portraits we see of her.

Given that both she and Donato had positions at the royal court, it seems a little odd that she'd go out of her way to do all the housework herself, so maybe she just enjoyed doing it?

Now taping all the evidence together and toeing the line between analysis and fanfiction:

It's clear that she loved Donato very much and was utterly devastated by losing him. But there's one thing that really stuck out to me in what little we see of her:

Doesn't she seem... angry? The way she's gritting her teeth, clutching the tablecloth, and how this is the first and only time we see her eyes opened that wide. In the following panel, you see her being quiet and dejected after her initial outburst. She's still crying very intensely, but her brows are furrowed, and she's not really responding to Donato's affection in her body language.

We're not told the details of how she felt about losing Donato other than that it upset her. But this, to me, implies that she was angry and resented that he was aging, that the end of his life was approaching. An "it's not fair" type of preemptive grief. And if this was the first and last time she cried like this in front of her family, she was either very good at coping in private... or very bad at letting herself feel unpleasant emotions until they become unavoidable and end up overwhelming her.

It's not too remarkable a detail on the surface. It's even reminiscent of what the audience has seen of Marcille. But... when it comes to the big picture, you'd think an elf who voluntarily chose to marry a tall-man and have a half-elf child would have been better prepared for this.

It kind of recontextualizes her cheerfulness to me.

"I'm sure everything's gonna be okay!" (or some variation thereof, depending on what translation you have).

And this is stated to contrast her extreme grief when finally confronting Donato's failing body and eventual death. But I'm wondering if... maybe this optimism was why she was so upset. What if she went into all of it thinking "everything's gonna be okay"? What if she was a little young by elven standards, and just followed her heart thinking that her own resilience would get her through anything?

Of course, only to get completely overwhelmed when she actually loses Donato. She turns into a completely different person. And that's heartbreaking on its own-- but what the audience sees is the effect it had on Marcille. Can you imagine being her, watching your invincible and upbeat mother suddenly lose all the light in her eyes in one go?

I've already made a huge post about how I think Marcille models her "work persona" off her mother, but another thing that stuck with me as I was looking for more details in the manga was this:

copy pasting from the other post i made about it lmao it's like... the second she resigns herself to lifelong pain and terror, there's another portrait of her mother facing her like this. with their heads bowed, in mirrored body language of resignation and despair and sorrow. Except it's posed like Marcille is still looking at her mother but her mother is looking away.

It took me a second to realize, but I think that it's a visual metaphor for the fact that Marcille's mother was the only long-lived role model she had-- and she failed to model healthy grief for her daughter. I don't say this as an accusation or to disparage her as a character, but just as a matter of fact. In her, Marcille was seeing herself older and losing a short-lived spouse or loved one of her own, and all she saw was hopelessness.

But her mother didn't mean to instill hopelessness and terror in her. She wasn't really thinking of how it would truly affect Marcille at all (at least, that's how I'm interpreting her looking down and away from Marcille in the metaphor), she was just sad. And she, in her own way, was trying to protect her daughter and help her prepare for future losses.

What she meant was "loss is inevitable, and you have to learn how to be in pain but live on anyway." What Marcille heard was "loss is inevitable, and you will be scared and hurt for the rest of your life."

Again. Marcille's mother doesn't feature explicitly in the story the way her father does -- but in so many ways, her shadow, her silhouette, her reflection is always hanging over Marcille.

All that to say... headcanon-wise (everything from here on is 100% without evidence lmao), I'd like to think that she matured and realized that she failed Marcille. I imagine her being regretful about it, wanting a chance to fix it but never finding a way to insert herself back into Marcille's life when Marcille is so so so busy becoming the most accomplished mage possible. I imagine her being herself again, now, so many years after her loss and after remarrying -- but with her cheerfulness tempered with a lot more wisdom and the pain of having gone through loss like that. I think the second Marcille actually tells her what happened in the dungeon, she'd want to go running to her daughter again -- if Marcille tells her the full truth instead of just being embarrassed she let things get that far. (oh, the tragedy of her wanting to be more like her mother and an accomplished adult who doesn't need to be babied... being embarrassed to actually tell her mother how much she fucked up...)

There's also the tension of her having remarried -- I know that there's at least a little bit of resentment that Marcille harbours about that, because she's childish like that at heart even if she makes an effort not to externalize it. I think that her mother would be aware of that, potentially adding to her sense of guilt and apprehension at trying to reappear/intrude on Marcille's life. I honestly don't think Marcille has met her stepfather -- or even considers him a stepfather rather than "mama's new husband" and kind of a total stranger. I think she and her mother actively don't talk about it in their correspondence, like an elephant in the room.

but, ultimately, I think her mother is on her side no matter what. Ancient magic? Dark necromancy? Sure, she'll feel guilty and like she was partially responsible for setting Marcille down such a painful path, but she wouldn't care. that's her daughter!! she would've moved back west and been petitioning for her at the court, buying a house right next to the Canaries barracks and visiting her every day that she wasn't on a mission. And if her husband had opinions on Marcille becoming a "dark arts user," he either gets over it or it's divorce with him. Yes, she might have had her optimism completely humbled by losing Donato like that -- but she's still headstrong and self-assured and she doesn't care what people think of her. It's her way or the highway and she's always going to be in Marcille's corner.

(She also needs a name lol. I went with Juno, just to be cute about "Marcille"s closest real life equivalent being Marcella, which is the female version of Marcellus, which in turn is a diminutive of Marcus, which was derived from Mars. Absolutely in love with Marcille potentially being named after Ares/Mars the fucking god of war btw)

[ichorblossoms]

lots of respect for ppl who don't post/talk abt certain oc things due to not wanting to spoil their own stuff, however i will not be doing that. by the time any of this stuff is finished it'll probably be different anyways

[star--anon]

how have I never talked about Frypan and Gally before

oh my god I have typed and discarded so many drafts talking about this to the point where I literally forgot that I've never posted something talking about it

listen listen. In the books, Newt tells Thomas that most Gladers take on more than one job. And I always wondered what Frypan did when he wasn't cooking..

and for some reason I figured he'd be a Builder.. He develops his own cooking recipes and loves fiddling around with different ideas, testing out measurements and quantities of ingredients and different flavors etc. etc.

He'd fit right in as a (part-time) Builder

His and Gally's relationship was mostly inspired when I rewatched Maze Runner. Gally storms off, and Frypan grabs his arm and goes, "Gally.." to which Gally shakes him off with, "Nah, Fry." He leaves, and Frypan chases after him. That one single moment implies so much ohmygod-

[einsatzzz]

OC Crossovers (1/3): Tea Time with Myr and Lidija (@myrmyrtheorca 's OCs!) Kurumi may or may not be telling Lidija about shoujo manga while Myr is just chilling there and relaxing from the nice atmosphere.

[kens-puku]

Y'all are gonna think I'm so weird.

But I'm running with this idea I've had for a while for my mcl ocs. Well, other than the actual other mcl ocs I've made.

It's part lazy, part bizarre.

Clones.

Yep, clones.

My MCL NG oc is a clone of the original Puku, but different. I haven't figured out the details yet, but it's like what I did with Pukun, Puku's male clone. It has the idea of a type of clone theory idea of nature vs nurture. The DNA and nature of the puku clones is the same, but the nurture is always a bit different depending on circumstances. Puku "prime" is the parent of all the clones made, but Puku "prime" had a different parentage and upbringing than the clones. Not to mention, the events of each mcl game has different outcomes for clone Puku.

This Puku has -teal- hair and is a zoomer, I guess. Raised by Puku "prime" and has the existential grappling of dealing with being a clone in general.

There's... still a lot of ironing out to do. Like... Where does Kentin fit into all this? How should I incorporate the family given to Puku 2.0 in New Generation?

Why am I giving this plot to an MCL OC!??

lol

[suncaptor]

yeah this cannot go on i need to take something like my chest is exploding i can't calm down it's 7am i feel insane insane insaneeeee

[velvetvexations]

Granted I do have one thing I've told exactly two people because I'm beyond terrified of it being so cringe as to lower people's respect for me by a significant amount. Like, it's nothing illegal or even illegal adjacent, nothing sexual or anything like that, literally just cringe.

But like, I think if I told you (I'm not going to tell you) you'd be like "oh, yeah, yeah, it makes total sense to be scared of that, obviously, damn."

[coffeeandcalligraphy]

hit 10k in changing states btw <3

[coollyinterferes]

"Back by unpopular demand:"

"Us!"

[silverselfshippingchaos]

hm.

[svtskneecaps]

the only thing stopping me from writing a fucking charlie slimecicle + elmariana + juanaflippa family centric time loop fic is the fact that i missed every single flippa stream live (finally plunged into qsmp a few days after tallulah appeared) and i don't have the time to watch back through the vods because HOLY SHIT CAN WE GET 30 FUCKING SECONDS WITHOUT SOMETHING HAPPENING ON THIS SERVER WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK