#i love all the flute bits in the soundtrack too!

[justacasualidiot]

AAAAAAAA I JUST WATCHED SUZUME AND IT WAS SO GOOD IT MADE ME CRY SO MUCH AND IT WAS SO BEAUTIFUL I LOVED THE STORY AND HOW IT FELT LIKE A MYTH OR LEGEND AND IT WAS SO AMAZING I LOVED IT SO MUCH LIKE ACTUALLY THAT WAS SO AMAZING AND THE SOUNDTRACK WAS REALLY GOOD TOO JUST AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA (ugly crying rn)

(shhhh in this household we pretend Souta is only like 18 or 19 instead of 21 bc that age gap is a little… like yeah it’s four years but she’s 17. not yet an adult. I’m just going to remain in my fantasy world where Souta is actually 18 or 19 so it’s less… yeah. let me be delusional.)

[studentinpursuitofclouds]

Oh my hey! Please, if you haven't already, please, could you do if you haven't please do favorite singer and song of the sdv bachelor/ettes

Oh, this is the first time I've posted an ask about a topic like this, so I hope I did it right. Thanks for the question, and have a great day! 🫰💕

_________________________________________

SDV bachelors:

Harvey's radio will always play Louis Daniel Armstrong or Ella Jane Fitzgerald because the doctor loves listening to jazz. If he wants something more energetic, Harvey will switch to the Latin music radio channel. He's sure to start dancing in the kitchen when Pete Rodríguez's "I Like It Like That" comes on. With music like that, cooking dinner becomes more interesting and fun.

It may sound pretty cliche, but Alex will definitely have a workout playlist with songs from the 80s rock and roll, pop rock and metal genres. Stan Bush ("Touch", "Fight for survive", "Never surrender"), Paul Engemann ("Push it to the limit, "The Eagle Lands"), Survivor ("Eye of Tiger"), Judas Priest ("All guns blazing", "The Sentinel") would be his favorites.

I'm sure Sebastian will be a fan of alternative rock (Nirvana - "Smell like teen spirit" and "Lithium"), emo-core (Taking back Sunday - "Cute without an "E") and electronic rock (almost all Celldweller albums, his favourite album is "Wish upon a Blackstar"). I also think that Sebby often likes to enjoy breakcore, not really remembering the specific artists and listening to whatever he likes. This is how I imagine Sebastian trying to explain to his mom what breakcore is (Warning: loud).

It's quite difficult with Sam because he's a real melomaniac. He listens to absolutely everything and almost all the time. Depending on his mood, he can listen to both heavy metal and pop music. However, the most frequently played bands in his music player are definitely the Beatles (his two favourite albums are "Help" and "Yellow submarine"), Coldplay ("Yellow") and Arctic Monkeys (the album"AM"). And also any popular song that gets stuck in his head (California girls we're unforgettable, daisy dukes bikini on top-).

Classics for Elliott! Our dear writer - and without masterpieces of classical music? Unthinkable! Mozart, Beethoven, Tchaikovsky, Vivaldi, Grieg, Debussy - all either playing in his little radio on the table, or the writer himself sits down at his piano and plays music by famous composers. He also loves modern classical music, and sometimes light jazz.

Shane listens to rock and heavy metal like Metallica, Ramstein, AC/DC all the time and you won't change my mind (I'll fight for that headcanon). I like to think he just lies on his bed, turns on his music player and plays the loudest heavy rock you can imagine in his headphones. One of his favourite songs that he listens to all the time is "For whom the bell tolls" (Metallica).

SDV bachelorettes:

Actually, I always thought that Maru would like synthwave and retrowave genre. I don't know why, but it would be just her style to include a playlist with synthwave artists (all Home songs, especially "Resonance" and "Head first"). If this genre is a too calm and the young inventor wants something a bit more energetic, her choice would be Daft Punk (Around the world, around the woooooooooooooorld!) or Disclosure ("Grab her" and "Omen" are her favorite songs).

Abigail's choices are quite chaotic. One moment she can listen to dark electro (Owl vision - "Horus" and "Holy shit"), and the next moment the amethyst lover admires folk music and promises herself that she will also learn to play the flute (Percival Schuttenbach - almost all songs, but especially "Karanfilce" and "Lazare", as well as Sowulo - the whole album "Sol"). She is also a lover of video game soundtracks and dark ambient. As I said before, pretty chaotic music taste.

All the popular pop, dance-pop and R&B you can think of - that's what Haley's playlist is. Ariana Grande, Doja Cat, Rihanna, Beyoncé, Britney Spears.... Haley doesn't have a particular favourite song, she likes everything. In the evening she likes to listen to the same pop and dance music songs, but in slowed down version + reverb.

Emily just can't live without energetic dance music. She could probably compete with Sam for the title of Starview Valley's music lover. And the genres can be diverse: from electro-swing (Caravan Palace) to Latin music (don't play Kaoma - "Lambada" in front of her, otherwise she will drag you to dance), from RnB (Beyoncé) to disco (Bee Gees).

When classical music is played, Penny falls into a melancholic mood. She is particularly affected by Claude Debussy's cycle of six piano pieces "Children's Corner", and she loves to listen to the piano version and the orchestra version equally. Besides classics, the young teacher also likes to listen to Enya (she always sheds tears when she listens to "May it be" or "Aniron"). But Penny will shed real rivers of tears if she hears the soundtrack from Titanic (especially "Hymn to the Sea").

If you ask Leah about her favourite music, the artist will name you a few groups of indie music and alternative music. After all, those are her favourite genres. In her free time, she sometimes likes to relax listening to Slenderbodies (especially "Belong" and "Opal ocean"), or Glass Animals (she can listen to the whole "Zaba" album all day long and she won't get bored). Leah also loves listening to songs by the indie duo King of Convenience (especially "Mrs Cold").

[thetwilightroadtonightfall]

I can’t stop listening to Scala’s field theme in khml, it’s like crack to me……I don’t have the musical knowledge to explain just how perfect it is, but I’m gonna try!

The first thing that really caught my attention was the piano at the beginning. It’s so beautiful and light, eliciting a feeling of whimsy, like you’re floating up into the sky on a lift or even a ferris wheel, staring at the clouds around you. And the special part is exactly how the notes are played, ascending and descending the notes, perhaps scaling up and down. I don’t think I need to explain how fitting that is for this world.

Then the flute comes in, making that melody all the more lighter and softer. The other instruments support the calming tone really well too, going at an easygoing pace that would match a pleasant stroll. The perfect andante! It’s a bit different from Before the Daylight (Daybreak Town) and even The Afternoon Streets, feeling less sleepy, but still laidback and inspiring. It reminds me lot of Happy Hair Day actually, especially with its playful tone and strong, soaring string section. Even the bit of xylophone adds a special little touch of innocence and joy, reminding me of At Dusk, I Will Think of You where it’s used most prominently.

The whole thing feels like a love letter to music from the Baroque era, like Mozart, Vivaldi, those sorts of pieces (Baroque society, anyone? :) ). It’s really great for walking around and exploring, setting the tone for the town and the game in general. Based on how skillfully layered this piece is and how similar it feels to kh3’s soundtrack in particular, I really wouldn’t be surprised if this was composed by the queen Yoko Shimomura herself. It’s amazing how profound a simple piece of music can be!!

[dkniade]

Oh my gosh so much is going on in the music and visuals of the Xiao Chasm cutscene. So many thoughts, mostly from Xiao’s pov

For the narrative aspect, I’m looking at primarily the music’s motifs/leitmotifs, as well as the animation’s editing (that is, sequential order of shots) and shot composition (visual symbolism)

Context: I know the quest’s general plot but not the details. This is my first time watching this cutscene. This post will make more sense if you have it side-by-side with the cutscene video.

Warning: near character death, Xiao’s suicidal ideation is the general theme but I discuss it in a particularly graphic manner in one line for the 3:09 section

1:02 - is that the same motif that appeared in “Storm Befalls” and “Perpetual Motion of Wind”. Would that part symbolize the Anemo element—“Storm Befalls” plays when we first meet the corrupted/mind-controlled Stormterror who’s under the assumption that Mondstatians betrayed him when it was his duty to guard them—oh, and maybe duty vs freedom?

1:09 - is that the motif from the cryobedo shot in the 2.3 PV, what. Corruption? (Cryobedo is a Whooperflower corrupted by Durin’s blood, and Durin & Dragonspine heart is associated with deep red and black. likewise Xiao seems to be holding back some sort of deep red/black corruption)(that look like a whale for some reason. I’m probably distracted) Idk

1:24 - Yelan is showing off her elemental attacks so we’ve got the default motif based on a Mond battle theme that shows up a lot in attack shots of character demo soundtracks. Makes sense, good job

1:31 - I LOVE how Xiao’s leitmotif from his demo is included. In his demo this bit is played when he’s about to give in to the corruption at the marsh, I think.

1:36 - And then in this cutscene it cuts to a flashback of Zhongli’s lone figure with the music immediately calming (paralleling Venti’s lone flute in Xiao’s demo. I see what you did there.) and also obvious foreshadowing to Zhongli saving him a few minutes later

1:56 - Xiao’s demo leitmotifs continues as we move back to the present. We get multiple sections all out of order from the demo. We also see everyone fighting the dark blob things. These guys are in deeeeep danger—but especially Xiao.

2:29 - that shot communicates how tiny and weak they are against this dark energy as it overtakes the blue circle. Perfect

2:53 - the Fantastic Compass is cracking and Xiao’s mask too in the next shot. Really feels like they’re not gonna make it. The Yaksha General Alatus is going down

3:09 - Yenfei: “You can’t keep this up… your strength won’t last…” *Immediately a calm and inappropriately uplifting flute (?) & strings version of Xiao’s leitmotif (near the start of his demo, but that one is with a heavily distorted electric guitar) plays.* Xiao’s duty is coming to an end and he’s gonna sacrifice himself for the sake of protecting the rest of the group. (It’s like… the mentality of suddenly being calm and cheerful as one plans to commit suicide, not because they enjoy death, but because they believe this is the only way that their suffering will end.)

3:18 - *animation shows him sending everyone back* Yelan desperately reaching out to Xiao and with Paimon’s tiny voice calling out for him breaks my heart… and the magic compass. It’s shattered. He’s gone

3:35 - The golden threads of a Geo symbol save Xiao who’s falling in the darkness. It’s obviously Zhongli—as foreshadowed in that earlier shot I talked about. (Also isn’t that glow pattern the same as Zhongli’s “vision” glow)

3:47 - brief shot of Zhongli’s robe as he overlooks the chasm. Nice, obvious confirmation to every foreshadowing about him that occurred before. Woohoo. Xiao looks back in the next shot. He knows

-

General conclusion: I think… if you’re familiar with Xiao’s & Zhongli’s basic settings, Xiao’s character demo, the Yaksha intro cutscene, and the basic premise/plot of the Chasm quest, then by music alone you should be able to guess the major emotional beats in this cutscene. (The cutscene’s soundtrack is called “Hang by a Thread”.) Genshin Impact’s musical storytelling is godly.

-

Misc thoughts

Yanfei’s loredump of the Fantastic Compass could’ve been executed better ksjskks

Cinematography is also gorgeous of course, the visual effects and expressions whoa

He’s doing this as the Yaksha General Alatus huh…

Xiao needs to drink some water. (English dub)

[thirdwifeofriversong]

thoughts on the shadow and bone season 2 score! (part one)

from a s&b fan, non-professional cellist, and soundtrack enthusiast (listening before the show drops)

1. On the Run (3:42)

definitely mal and alina theme- great to be back with trapanese!!

2. Market Chase (2:49)

fuck yeah!!! love the chase music and the cellos really carry the soundtrack in the best way (not biased or anything but really they’re the best objectively) also the haunting, ethereal flute theme from the middle was amazing - definitely guessing mal/alina are getting chased based on that theme callback

3. Tolya and Tamar (2:14)

i’m in LOVE! giving me real pirates of the caribbean vibes in the best way— playful but also a bit of danger *chefs kiss* also the transition to some of the crows’ theme from “just ask” is such an interesting choice (and one of my fav parts from the s1 soundtrack!!) makes me intrigued about if it’s a cut to a different scene with the crows or if they interact that early👀

4. Wylan (2:28)

i wonder if this track is wylan’s theme or if it’s playing while he’s being introduced— not as clear cut as tolya and tamar’s theme. very airy and anticipatory, and the staccato at the end really contributed to those feelings

5. Come Sail Away (2:03)

i’ve listened to this on repeat since they released it as a single. love. epic. definitely a fight scene or at least one with a lot of tension and action.

6. Brother (1:47)

yeah if we had any doubt it was kaz, it’s gone now. i’m not ready to see that scene. music isn’t too overbearing and leaves a sense of silence even in the sound (if that makes sense), very haunting and full of dread. maybe i’m projecting but i don’t see how this could be a different scene with the track having this title.

7. Arriving at the Island (1:09)

pretty short track. my guess for the island is kerch? seems like the sun summoner team is gonna go to ketterdam 🙌 based on the inclusion of their theme

8. Crows Ambushed (2:27)

oh this is great (the music not the crows getting ambushed). the fast tempo and ominous slides are perfect. love me some chase music. would be so fun to be in the orchestra playing this one.

9. Return of the Useless Grunt (1:25)

kind of unsure what this will be. i jokingly said it was gonna be mal but i’m genuinely uncertain. different vibes than all the other tracks so far and has a bit of a tonal shift towards the middle.

10. I’m Here for the Killers (2:16)

ooh. hellgate maybe? gives very dark vibes. really enjoyed the tremolos at the end accompanied by an almost marching theme- but very much like marching to the gallows. doesn’t have much overlap with the other themes we know except maybe in key.

[redshift-corridor]

Okay consider this me feeling prompted to just send an ask about whatever

What are some of your favourite Octopath tracks, from either game?

OKAY time to dig into this. I'm trying not to get too excessive so I'll keep it to a few thematic categories (yes there are way too many tracks I like that I don't want to cut out :,D) This will be heavily OT2-biased too - while OT1 is still my second favorite OST of all time, it lost a bit of ground in direct comparison to 2.

Character Themes

1. Agnea / Partitio

This is a case of "whichever I'm listening to atm is the better one" but overall I think Agnea has the upper hand if I take all versions of her theme into account (Song of Hope goes without saying, and I'm very partial to her pursuit theme).

2. Osvald

No one seems to like this one as much as I do :,) It's not as immediately in your face as most of the other themes and takes a bit to pick up, which is a bit of a problem with the pursuit theme (my favorite in the game by far) and short battle intro dialogue. I feel this this is the only theme where you can really hear the character development in the progression from character theme to final battle.

3. Primrose

Mainstream choice, I know, but this one stuck with me. Probably because of the immense Yuki Kajiura vibes.

Region Themes

1. Leaflands

Literally the reason why I decided to buy the soundtrack based on a 40 second sample lol. The day version is my second favorite theme overall.

2. Hinoeuma

A theme I didn't pay too much attention to until I played the game and ended up standing in the desert just to listen. The night version wins here. That flute. <3

3. Sundering Sea (Night)

Extremely underrated. Idk how much time I spent hanging out on the ocean to this theme.

4. Frostlands

Just so I have three real region themes in here, but this is one of my favorite winter/snow themes in games.

Town Themes

1. Wellgrove/Timberain (Day)

Probably my favorite game theme period. Wellgrove has kicked Tarrey Town of all things off the favorite town top spot and that's saying something. I just love that place okay. Sometimes it gets hard to listen to the rest of the soundtrack because I keep getting stuck on this one lol. (Reminds me a lot of Wild Wind too, another old favorite.)

2. Montwise/Merry Hills (Night)

I don't actually have a lot to say here, I just love this SO much.

3. Crackridge/Gravell (Day)

You know a soundtrack is fantastic when the theme that caters exactly to your tastes is only your third favorite.

4. Flamesgrace

Honorable mention to my favorite town theme ever before OT2 came out.

Battle Themes

1. Normal Battle I (OT2)

Another unpopular one because everyone seems to prefer II. I don't care. I wish this would play in higher level places.

2. They Who Govern Reason

Oh hey, OT1 got in the top 3 without the nostalgia boost. Favorite boss theme ever and not even the OT2 themes come close.

3. Fierce Confrontation / Critical Clash I

Another shared slot for the same reason as the character themes, I can't pick one.

OT2 Final Battle Themes

(yes these get their own section :D)

1. Song of Hope

No competition here, next. Lol. Agnea's theme is already that good on its own and this makes it so much better.

2. The Journey for Revenge Ends

Like I said, character development my beloved. You can hear how this man goes from nothing to lose to something to protect and they didn't even change the theme much.

3. The Journey for Kingship Ends

Took Hikari's theme long enough to do something for me, but it does it really well now. Points deducted for the fact that I couldn't really enjoy the battle because I loathe boss rushes and I didn't want to risk having to do the tedious duel again.

4. The Journey for Happiness Ends

Four again because I can't leave my beloved merchant out lol. What can I say, it's Partitio's theme. Probably the one that worked best for me while playing. Protip: sunset looks great here.

Other themes in no particular order

Victory Fanfares

Love those, especially 2.

Unshakable Resolve

I'm not crying. Phenomenal use in Castti's final chapter.

Beneath the Surface

OT1 wins in the dungeon theme department with this one, hands down.

Invitation to Darkness

Why didn't we get a whole dungeon with this. JFD felt really rushed tbh.

Final Final Battle Themes

Both are fantastic, but I very much prefer 2 to 1.

Sorry for the wall of text ;D

[asinglemagpie]

15 questions and 15 people, tagged by @gainux! Thank you, I love doing these too!

1: Are you named after anyone? So I actually found out extremely recently (in the last few months) that yes, I am. I am named after a friend of my maternal grandfather that my mum met once… but she was beautiful and smart and articulate, and that's what she wanted for me, and that was my name from that moment on.

Won't lie, two thoughts occurred: 1, wow I do not live up to my namesake LOL, and 2, did she potentially name me after one of my grandad's many affairs without knowing? (The first I said, the second I kept to myself but OOF…)

2: When was the last time you cried? Approximately 40 minutes ago because there's like 3 songs in the Hazbin Hotel soundtrack that make me cry, including the Finale XDDD

3: Do you have kids? Nope!

4: What sport do you play/have played? I played one netball match, and one basketball tournament - I was more of a dancer.

5: Do you use sarcasm? Constantly. I can't be sarcastic about it because then it sounds like lying lmao.

6: What is the first thing you notice about people? Probably their height. I'm a bit of a wee thing, so I'm always looking up at people XDD

7: What's your eye color? I'm honestly not entirely sure! I lean towards 'hazel' these days.

8: Scary movies or happy endings? Both - sometimes I need everyone to die, sometimes I need everyone to live.

9: Any talents? I can't dance any more, but I can still sing.

10: Where were you born? Cambridge. Closest I got to that university… XDD

11: What are your hobbies? I write again now! That takes up a lot of time between fic, novel, and RPing. I listen to music, loudly, and sing along whether it sounds good or not lol. I watch a lot of TV and movies, there's always something on in the background, and I like to try and watch a lot of non-English things too. I want to try going back to practising playing the flute again, and get back to reading… I've really fallen off the wagon with reading. There's a billion crafts I want to do and I'm set up for most of them, I just have to DO them which… yeah, we all know how that goes XDD

12: Do you have any pets? Sadly my only pets are my Furblets.

13: How tall are you? I am 5'4.

14: Favourite subject in school? Drama. I loved it, and did well in it. I started having severe memory issues in 6th Form which was very obvious when I suddenly couldn't remember scripts from one minute to the next, but through that and a whole host of other hardships I still managed to come out of it with top grades.

15: Dream job? Best selling author whose series gets turned into an award winning TV show or movie series with a ton of mech possibilities? Lottery winner?! In all seriousness… something I can support myself, my mum, and my partner with.

Tagging: @caspercryptid @heaventhing @lozzykins @neon-slime @rainbowd00dles @teawiththegods @theoi-crow @tonguetiedsmeghead @walnutgoat ... and anyone else who sees this and wants a go <3

[styrmwb]

Favorite Final Fantasy Music (FFXII)

I'm finally out of the XI hole and it feels strange: where's my tambourine and synth I need them

XII, commonly known as "Star Wars", is a very good game; however, I initially was absolutely not feeling its soundtrack. It felt too generic and orchestral. Of course, past Styrm is a Fucking Moron who did not realize what the soundtrack is, and that is Good. Sure, it's not as in your face different as some previous games are, but it is still uniquely itself, and not at all a generic orchestra soundtrack. Hitoshi Sakimoto was the main composer here, which is cool cause he also did Tactics, set in the same world as XII! (also Ogre Battle for you Ogre Battle enjoyers out there I see you) Anyways, list time.

5. The Sochen Cave Palace I love how mystical this song feels. The whole area it plays in is a damp, underground palace/cave combo (I know, it's in the name), so that initial choir really gives you that ancient deep feel, and then the horns come in for that grandiose nature befitting the actual palace part. The horns are also my favorite part of the song, I love that melody. Bonus points to this song playing in the area with the Mandragoras hunt (I like Mandragoras)

4. Chocobo Theme - FFXII Version Not gonna lie, it did feel a little dirty putting this song here rather than one of the game's unique compositions, but I gotta say: this is my favorite version of the chocobo theme. If I wasn't gonna put a variation of this song on this list, it wasn't going on any list. I love the ratchet usage, and the really cool wind instrument used for the main melody sounding almost distant in a way? the plucking bum bum bum is incredibly fun and sounds like I'm bouncing along on my horse bird and that makes me smile. Also, shoutouts to the wood block absolutely going ham. This song is like if you took all of the cool instruments in music class that all the kids wanted to play with and you put them together.

3. Discord - Imperial Version There are several songs titled "Imperial Version", and they all tend to share the same motif (there are other empire themed songs that have that motif as well), but this version is my favorite. The loud, threatening nature of the song perfectly in my mind pictures the judges, who are essentially the biggest antagonistic force in the entire game (and also this is their boss theme so it better fit them). I love the bass drum accenting the notes perfectly in the start; and that sort of horror-like string segment to start off the song, filling you with terror. The deeper horns throughout are absolutely incredible, and I love how that main empire motif sounds with this instrumentation.

2. The Dalmasca Estersand This is like, the first open world area in the game. And I think this song really prepares you for how the world is going to feel. This song is GRAND. This song is EPIC and BIG. Pretty much every overworld song is! And I think that's really cool and part of XII's soundtrack's charm. I think this song is a pretty good summary of the sounds that this game uses; a lot of heavy horns, big strings and drums, but with that slight bit of light nature in the little flute. As usual, I love the melody; there's not a single song on here I don't love the melody of; but my absolute favorite part of the song is the I wanna say third section of it, before it loops; right after the song plays a little flute trilling, the melody gets longer and drawn out, and it really feels like an adventure. The chimes bring a whimsical vibe to it too; which I think is perfect for the first zone in the game.

1. Battle with an Esper Yessssssssssssss this song is so cool. This is the song that plays as you're battling the espers (the summons). The whole song has a very heavy beat constantly playing in the back, like a heartbeat, which is so fun to listen to. The choir builds up the start, perfect for these weird, ancient monstrosities you're fighting, but instead of just being buildup, it's there throughout the entire song. It's in the melody, it takes a back seat, but it is always there, it is always menacing, and it's always awesome. I love when the choir matches with the heartbeat too. As usual, the XII brass squadron makes an appearance, although a more minor one compared to some songs, and as usual, they're amazing; but the string section is really the other main highlight of this song. The Dissidia version proves that this song is already perfect by just adding extra percussion and calling it a fucking day. We're also cheating and throwing a mention to The Esper, which is technically a different song, being where you actually summon the thing and control it instead, but it uses a lot of the same sounds, the same choir, and the same melody. This version is a lot more fast paced, has the percussion mainly replaced with a shaker and some big beats instead of the heartbeat, and has this really cool string section where they just go fucking HAM. I didn't want to give this it's own place, because it is essentially a byproduct of Battle with an Esper, but I couldn't just throw it in honorable mentions either.

Honorable mentions!: Giza Plains, Flash of Steel, Giving Chase, Battle on the Big Bridge (heh), Realm of Memory, and The Battle for Freedom

[rainbowxocs]

My Bio!! Written By Ana!!

Name: Ana ThoroughGood!

Old Patient Number: Patient 0.

Username: @fakeana0

Old Titles: Puppet.

Nicknames: Anabanana, Alice, Fake Ana.

Chronological Age: 25.

Age: 18! I think.. I dunno.

Pronouns: She/Her!

Sexuality: um.. I dunno-

Gender: Trans Girl! I think!

Species: Mimic! Tho I’m not a bad one I promise!!!

Mimic Information: Ana currently has made her own form, however she is technically mimicking Daisy’s.. um.. let’s just say “body”..

Medical Stuff: Uhhh.. I have issues and problems… But I dunno what they’re called.. Hypothermia….? Snowblindness…? frost.. Bite..? Autism….? Anxiety?????? No wings,, dissociation,,,,,, uhhhhh Probably more…

Religion: Uhhh I dunno. I use to believe in the cultivator I guess.. since he made me.. but he’s like- dead now.

Job: I don’t have a job at the moment. People don’t wanna hire me cause of my face haha.

Lives in: I use to live in Level Ten, but now I live in Wisconsin with the other patients.

Languages: English, Fae.

Height: Depends. Current form is in the 5 to 6 ft range.

Ethnicity: Fae.

Accent: Stilted, Awkward.

Powers: Ice and Snow Manipulation, Shapeshifting, Psychic Damage, Blue Fire.

Alignment: Lawful Good.

Text Color: Blue.

Favorite Color: Blue!

Favorite Animal: Polar Bear, Olm, Opossums!

Hobbies: uhhhh…. Drawing and Crafting..? I like.. to play the flute as well.. and I do Ice Skating..

Favorite Food: Snow, Sticks, Grass, Tree Bark, Raisins, Hot Chocolate, Chicken Soup, Christmas Cookies, Snow Cones, Snow Cream.

Favorite Flower: Snowdrops, Poinsettia, Holly, Mistletoe.

Scent: Tv Static, Freshly Fallen Snow, Flowers.

Handedness: Left Handed.

Blood Color: Glittery Black.

Birthday: December 20th 1999. (Daisy says I’m a goat..?)

Theme:

Playlist:

Fun Facts: I like math, and I like.. TV.. shows.. like.. I love Lucy and the Moomins.. I like.. spelling too.. and I like movies like the last unicorn, Alice and wonderland, Peter Pan, The Wizard of Oz.... cause it’s relatable.

Special Interests: Um.. dunno… I guess.. Mimicking?

Stims: Squishy Icecube, Fidget Jewelry, Shakers, Snowglobes, Sensory Jars.

Stimboard: LINK

Moodboard: LINK

Fashionboard: LINK

Soul: Inkcap Mushroom

Comfort Objects: Blanket, Snowglobe, Music Box, Mimikyu, Djungelskog, Blahaj, Flute, Paper Snowflakes, Heffalump Plush.

Family:

Camilla Liddell (Mother by Proxy.) She.. wasn’t really my mother at all..

The Cultivator. (Creator.) :(..

Daisy, Daisy, Bell. (Twin Sister, by Proxy.) :(…

Mouse ThoroughGood. (Sister Figure.) :) Mouse is one of my best friends.. I trust her with my life..

Friends: N/A.

Romance: N/A.

Models:

Brief Personality: Ana is incredibly awkward, It’s hard to have a true personality when you have been mimicking people for your entire life. But overall she is very sweet if a bit clingy, She doesn’t mean any harm to anyone she is just trying to figure herself out and who she truly is.

Brief Backstory: [COMING SOON]

[fluffstravels]

Dried Rations for Cosmic Hibernation

Dried Rations for Cosmic Hibernation (A Winter Prog/Psych Mix)

Van der Graaf Generator - Arrow - Godbluff / 1975

Happy the Man - Upon the Rainbow (Befrost) - Happy the Man / 1977

Island - Herold and King - Pictures / 1977

Terje Rypdal - The Hunt - Whenever I Seem To Be Far Away / 1974

Ashra - Deep Distance - New Age of Earth / 1976

Steve Tibbetts - The Alien Lounge - Yr / 1980

Tim Blake - Lighthouse - Blake's New Jerusalem / 1978

Anthony Phillips - Wise After The Event - Wise After The Event / 1978

Tangerine Dream - Bent Cold Sidewalk - Cyclone / 1978

FM - Black Noise - Black Noise / 1977

SUMMARY

The catalyst for this mix was listening to the second to last song listed, Bent Cold Sidewalk by Tangerine Dream, and realizing that in my brain there was an understanding of an oddly specific subset of late, sci-fi-influenced 70s progressive rock that felt like winter to me. The music has this kind of ultra nerd aura. Uneven, occasionally squeaky vocals (see the Tim Blake and Tangerine Dream tracks lol) contrasting with engrossing, rich instrumentation. Cold sequencers, inhuman reeds, war drums, woody guitars. All the elements of these songs come together to create some perfect sonic rendition of being snowed in, with little available to you besides hunkering down. If you’re like me, avoiding snowbound boredom is eerie movies and falling down endless rabbit holes of wikipedia articles. I hope you enjoy this mix and can find those lonely, dorky winter feelings that these songs bring me. <<<<<Track By Track Breakdown Below>>>>>

Arrow: VDGG is a band that I almost considered too good to put on this mix. Peter Hammill’s vampiric voice never fails to totally enrapture me, but the robotic goth keys, chilled saxophone (a running theme in this mix),  and the chugging bass+drums, are what seals this track as an all-time prog favorite for me. Hammill’s banshee declaration of the arrow-like unpredictability of death will shatter your bones.

Upon the Rainbow: Happy the Man’s cool jazzy electric piano pins this track like a fresh cuppa hot chocolate. The vocals are a bit like what I imagine a forest gnome’s Pavarotti (upon the rainBOWWWWWW) would sound like and I think they add a lot of whimsy to this track, especially with the fantasy lyrics. The sax and flute are also very welcome additions.

Herold and King: It’d be ignorant to do a “winter hibernation prog” mix and not try to capture the isolation and anxiety that can come with the season. The vocals on this track are fantastic, the singer emulates the haunting vibe that only Hammill has gotten otherwise. The reversed vocal freakout, underpinned by what sounds like VDGG and ELP’s angsty child who starts fires, is a highlight for me, and it only grows more disturbing from there. It’s a peculiar track, but if you like it, you love it.

The Hunt: This is the first of the two “ECM prog” tracks here, as in prog tracks from albums released by the jazz-focused label ECM. This track finds you in a frozen wasteland where King Crimson’s monolithic record Red, released this same year, once stood. Fuzz bass, machine drums, hazy fusion guitar, and a mysterious french horn create a soundtrack that would suit a fending off a polar bear as well as it’d suit trying to get the blanket to equally cover all parts of your frigid self. The mellotron towards the end is especially welcomed by me.

Deep Distance: Just as it’d be silly to ignore the anxieties of winter, it would be remiss of me to ignore the hazy atmosphere that holiday lights & decorations can bring. Manuel Gottsching crafts the innate wonder a snowy environment brings with synth, guitar, and percussion. You have no need to worry about shoveling the driveway or finding the right layers yet. You’re with whoever you love most, watching the snowfall from the comfort of the indoors by the fire, seeing the neighborhood lights twinkle out into an otherwise pitch black night. The Alien Lounge: Alien Lounge is ECM prog track no.2, and excerpted from Steve Tibbetts’ excellent 1980 album Yr, which I bring up as I’ve used his amazing hand-sketched cover for that album for this mix. The stark black and white rendering of an undefinable sci-fi portrait made it an easy fit. The track itself is a really delicate guitar-led piece that, paired with Deep Distance, continues that very cozy winter feel. I highly recommend this entire album paired with the warm beverage of your choice on a late, late night. Lighthouse: I admit this song is a VERY cheesy addition. Tim Blake is best known as a keyboardist for Gong during their classic Radio Gnome-era. All the synthesizers on this track are absolutely wonderful, spacey blurbing and bubbling at its best. The cheese comes from Blake’s vocals and the lyrics that feel equal to a 1950s B-Movie, rather than the expansive, immersive science fiction found elsewhere on this mix. That being said, I enjoy it a lot. Also, you can sing the lyrics to the Mystery Science Theater 3000 theme song over Blake’s vox.

Wise After The Event: I have to thank my good friend James for introducing me to this song because it fits the vibe I was seeking with this mix almost too snugly. Most know Phillips for his all-too-brief stint in Genesis, and at most maybe his “The Geese and the Ghost” record that features Mike Rutherford and Phil Collins. I do highly recommend “Geese”, but I also feel that Wise After The Event of is one of the most underappreciated prog records of the 70s. In it's title track, Phillips delivers a delicate vocal over gorgeous 12-string Rickenbacker guitar and earthy keyboards, with the lyrics conjuring imagery so equally vague and specific that Jon Anderson would be jealous. Bent Cold Sidewalk: I love this song and it's album, Cyclone, but I do understand why a TD-purist would be opposed to it. Cyclone is the crumbly bleu cheese of the influential Berlin School band’s discography, but I adore the goofy lyrics, melancholic vocals, wistful woodwinds, and theatrical percussion in this song so much. I hope that hearing it in the context of this pure prog rock context can make the most staunch Cyclone Grinch have a change of heart :) Black Noise: FM's Black Noise is far too under-discussed in prog circles. The violin/synth/drums trio is one of the most unique prog bands and they've made some of my favorite music in the genre. The titular song of that album tells the story of underground sewer lizard people facing their fears to come out into the world..or something. It works. The percussion on this song is magic, the synth is perfectly moody, the vocals are slightly goofy but so earnest they always win me over, and Nash the Slash’s soaring violin in the middle of the song is so good that you understand why these guys never bothered to find a guitarist. The buildup at the end of this song with the chunky Rickenbacker bass and the building synthesizer is so fittingly intense for the weird sci-fi world the band is trying to build. This is my favorite song on this mix, and the one I most strongly recommend.

If you’ve read all of this, thank you, and I hope you enjoy the mix I’ve put together!

[allthemusic]

Week ending: 14th July

No, we are not covering Taylor Swift in this post, despite the name of one of our tracks (I think the other track would make a banger Taylor Swift title, too, but that's by the by). Sorry, Swifties!

Evermore - Ruby Murray (peaked at Number 3)

We start with some shifting, flowing violins, which sets us up well for an opening line about how As the river constantly / Flows forever to the sea / As the waves beat on the shore / I shall love you evermore.

It's not the worst opening ever, though I have some questions about the need for "constantly" and "forever" in the line. Like, it's a bit of a tautology, surely, including both of those words? I know it makes the line scan, but still...

It's pretty, though, and while the "I'll always love you" genre feels a bit tired nowadays, these 1950s songs have a certain earnestness that I've found charming. It's a romantic song about how Ruby and her lover are happy together and will stay together forever and -

Though you say you can't pretend / That you are more than just a friend / I shall always hope and pray / That you'll love me in the end.

Oh dear, Ruby.

I was so willing to give this song a pass, but this is just tragic. Ruby is declaring her undying feelings for a person who not only doesn't like her back, but sounds like they've gone out of their way to be nice but clear about it. This sounds like some textbook good communication from Ruby's love interest, and instead of taking them at their word, Ruby's pining hopelessly after them. And I know that feelings are feelings, and she might legit feel like that, but there's something very pathetic about it.

Also something a little bit stalkerish. Whoever they are, they don't like you, and Ruby's refusal to just get over it is definitely weird. I don't know, I would feel very weird being the recipient of this song. I don't know, I just don't think delcaring your passive but undying love is a great way to get anyone's attention.

Tragic, and not in a good way.

Cool Water - Frankie Laine & The Mellomen (2)

Ooh, I think I've heard this one before? Looking it up, I'm seeing a song by the same name by Marty Robbins, which I've definitely listenend to, so maybe it's the same song? In which case, I'm expecting a Western kind of vibe - the track I'm thinking of dates back to 1936 and is apparently a bit of a Western classic.

Yes, it is indeed the same song, and in quite a nice version, too. The Mellomen do a bit more here than they did in Where Will the Dimple Be, but not much more. Instead, Frankie's the star of the show, in what turned out to be a surprisingly mellow tune.

We start with some backing singers intoning the title in the background. They keep this up throughout the song, periodically just chanting "water" or "cool clear water" and hitting a magnificently low note to end the whole thing. If you can't tell, I like it a lot - a good use of backing singers.

On top of that, we then get some strummy guitar, bells and a lovely bit of trumpet and flute. All very lush and soundtrack-esque, and a great set-up to the story Frankie's about to start telling, which tells of a man travelling through a barren waste, along with a companion only called Old Dan. A quick Google suggests Old Dan is a mule, but I missed this completely for my first few listen-throughs and just assumed Dan was a travelling companion. Oops!

Either way, Frankie and Dan are both thirsty, plodding along with throats burned dry / And souls that cry for water. Which is just some very effective description. It's almost making me feel thirsty, so I can only imagine how Frankie's feeling.

This leads into my favourite bit of the track, the chorus, where the speed picks up and Frankie sings to Dan, urging him to Keep a moving, Dan / Don't listen to him, Dan / He's a devil, not a man / He spreads the burning sand with water. I don't know who "he" is, but in some ways the ambiguity makes the song even better. Suddenly, it's a song about a cowboy completely unravelling in the desert, hallucinating strange figures and talking to his mule about it. And the contemptuous vehemence with which he spits devil out only adds to the intrigue.

Unfortunately, the critical spirit doesn't last - in the next few lines, the music swells and Frankie's suddenly singing about a big green tree and how the water's waiting there for you and me. Which is basically the mode the song ends in, with Frankie wandering, likely delusional, into the desert in search of water that may or may not exist. His fate is left unclear, creating a sort of horror that's hidden under all the pretty instrumentation and smooth backing vocals. Like, does Frankie actually survive his trek? Nobody knows!

I think it's this lyrical and musical dissonance that I like. That and the Western vibes, which I generally enjoy, when they come up. They're rarely boring, at least, and they usually range from okay to excellent. Frankie's bringing a sort of understated class to this particular Western tune, and the Mellomen are certainly a welcome addition (though I still don't know why they're getting credited for it!)

Well, I think there was a clear highlight here. You should listen to Cool Water. It's a cool song, pun entirely intended, and it's got a lovely chill vibe to it. Good music for before bed.

Favourite song of the bunch: Cool Water

[pitagain]

#365DaysOfVGM Day 154:

Lilac's Treehouse/Beta Dragon Valley 1/Tutorial/Dragon Valley (Freedom Planet/Freedom Planet 2 [2014/2022])

Another indie game I just 100%’d with most achievements, getting a solid 3/5 star rating from me, maybe even a 3.5/5 depending on my experience getting the rest of the Time Attack achievements at a later date! The ambitious soundtrack should already be a great incentive to get the game, with its clear love to Gunstar Heroes, Mega Man X4, Sonic games, and other 16-bit/32-bit inspirations alike, all in the same year of Shovel Knight’s respect to the 8-bit era! Good 1st impressions such as the following might show you that…

Out of all the detailed Dragon Valley variants, I like the treehouse version the most, it’s one of the few cases where I prefer the simplicity. The Guitar here certainly helps matters, making it feel like a comfortable home like it should. And of course I gotta mention the Flute playing the main Dragon Valley melody, it’s what makes this track feel like a treehouse, after all! Being forced to choose between all the 20+ tracks I love from this game was a difficult choice, I’m not able to properly showcase where the soundtrack excels at by choosing any one track.

Although I have to say, it feels like I’m cheating with the Freedom Planet 2 track’s inclusion here, because it sounds NOTHING like the 1st game’s until the very last 29 seconds via a soothing Flute (Is it a Dizi? I’m not certain, but I like it!) carried over from the intro, but goddamn, the soundtrack of Freedom Planet 2 already feels like nothing short of a masterpiece from the little I heard before playing the 1st game! I already feel this uncommon desire to put its music everywhere I go, I mean, just hear that Saxophone, its gone places I’ve never seen that instrument ever reach before! The Piano and Guitar combo breaking up the exciting Saxophone in specific segments is also nothing short of beautiful!

In case you’re wondering, yes, I did push the day for this specific track back a few days just so I’d have more to talk about by finishing the game in question! Its got some Mega Man logic in some of its design aspects, which I think works in its favor more often than not, rewarding your precision plenty. The way health and the energy bars are managed also preserves the flow nicely without coming to a halt, even upon taking damage.

The comfortable gameplay flow goes for the boss fights too, which are quick and easy to learn, then the playable characters help complement this with their variety in gameplay styles that switch up the difficulty of stages and bosses alike, although Carol definitely got the short end. Thanks to all that, this game benefits nicely from replays, which I feel not many platformers I’ve played lately have been able to accomplish quite as much.

Lastly, I don’t see the so-called “cringe” others do in the story, but rather a lack of quality coming from the incomplete feeling caused by the sheer amount of unresolved seeds it plants (As well as a left-field moment or 2 that might force the sequel to slow down a bit, all to justify it), making it a mere prologue to what I assume Freedom Planet 2’s story will actually attempt something interesting with. I highly look forward to what I can find in that sequel in all areas!

(Length before loop [All]: 2+ minutes)

[jeonbunnie]

better off

pairing: reader x jeongguk

@moonchild1​ requested: “I was just listening to better off by ariana (one of my favourites) so I thought I’d recommend it for a angst and smut fic with jungkook the lyrics says it all…”

summary: things get messy after a one night stand with your labelmate

genre: angst; smut; celebrity!au;18+;

soundtrack: better off—ariana grande (highly recommend listening to this version )

content/warnings: fake dating; friends with benefits; fuckboy!jeongguk; swearing; mentions of sex

a/n: this took me entirely too long to write 😭 I made so many drafts and I still cut in in half smh. also not beta’d bc I just need it to get this story out of my head!! 

word count: 3.3k

♪ I’m better off without him. I’m better off being a wild one♪

“Fancy seeing you here.”

You jumped and let out a little curse when the champagne sloshed out of the pretty flute in your hands. You’re taken back by the sweet, familiar voice cutting through the afternoon quiet.

“Sorry,” he said, “I didn’t mean to startle you..”

You’d know that voice anywhere. Of all the places you worried about running into your ex—in the studio, at the label, on the red carpet—you never imagined running into Jeongguk on the rooftop of a stranger’s party.

Your ex. If you could even call him that. Your relationship had been little more than a PR stunt. But you couldn’t avoid him forever, not in this business. You set the flute on the balcony and turned around. One way or another, you were always going to have this conversation; you just thought you’d have more time to put away your feelings before facing him again.

Jeongguk looked good. Breathtaking in an all-white fit that made him stick out amongst the glittering metallic hues of the partygoers downstairs. With his hair swept back from his face, he was handsome as ever and pretty like a heartbreak.

“It’s okay,” you said. “You just caught me off guard. I wasn’t expecting anyone to come up here. . .” You thought no one would miss you from the party downstairs, that you’d finally get some time to yourself. But you should have known better.

The second you set foot in the city, Jeongguk was all you could think about. He was always on your mind, and it wasn’t just because his face was on every billboard. Of course, Jeongguk was at this party. You might as well have conjured him up.

Seeing him here felt like your mind was playing tricks on you, but it was only a matter of time. You were constantly spinning in each other’s orbits, so it shouldn’t have come as a surprise.

That strange magnetic pull led Jeongguk right here, right back to you. After the distance the oceans put between you on tour, you convinced yourself that you were over him. But instead, you felt weak just looking at him.

“It’s good to see you again,” you started, defaulting to small talk.

Jeongguk quirked an eyebrow. “Do you really mean that? I know you’ve been avoiding me.”

“Don’t be silly,” you said, voice calm and even, a technique you picked up on through all those press tours and interviews where you had to conceal the truth. “I’m not avoiding you.”

Of course, that was a lie—you’d been avoiding Jeongguk ever since you slept together.

You couldn’t deny it. Your actions made it obvious; you declined all press events since you’ve parted ways, hoping to avoid any headaches it might cause to be in the same room with Hollywood’s Golden Boy.

Jeongguk knew you were lying because he knew all your tells (how you fidgeted with your hands and bit your lip, how you couldn’t look him in the eyes). He also knew he was in love with you and had been for some time now, so it broke his heart to know you were purposely keeping your distance.

But he wouldn’t call you out on it. Jeongguk couldn’t believe you were here. Really here. Not dream or his imagination, but standing just a few feet away. Any sudden moves, and just like last time, you’d bolt away; he wasn’t gonna make the same mistake twice. Now that you were finally here, he wouldn’t screw up his one chance to talk to you. So instead of calling your bluff, he said: “Why didn’t you tell me you were back in LA?”

“I’ve just been really busy,” you said, a convenient truth. You’d been hiding behind promotions of your new album for months now, blaming your absence on your tour, bouncing from city to city. But Jeongguk knew the truth.

“Too busy for me?” He asked, sounding more vulnerable than he intended.

You shrugged, still not making eye contact. “Wasn’t that the plan all along? I hear you’re pretty busy, too. Congrats on your Grammy nomination, by the way.”

Jeongguk knew what you were implying. The relationship had never been genuine. It was all a show arranged by your label to benefit your careers. You made each other look good; it cleaned up Jeongguk’s image to be seen with America’s sweetheart and made you the object of all desire and attention, posing on the arm of everyone’s favorite bad boy. A win-win situation. And it worked; the plot succeeded. There was no reason to be together now—and you clearly didn’t feel a need to keep in touch. So why was it so hard for Jeongguk to walk away?

“I should go,” you said, breaking the awkward silence. “My manager will kill me if I don’t at least try to mingle at this party.” You were just about to walk past him, to leave him alone again, but Jeongguk grabbed your wrist.

“(Y/n), wait,” he said, voice soft. The touch wasn’t forceful; you could break away if you wanted to. But feeling the heat of his skin on yours was enough to stop both of you in your tracks.

“If I don’t say this, I’ll never forgive myself.” He paused to take a breath and the right words because he couldn’t mess this up. “Ever since that night—I haven’t stopped thinking about you.”

You couldn’t get it out of your head either; Jeongguk’s touch still lingered. The memory of it all was imprinted on your mind. Every time you closed your eyes at night, you were there, in that room with him. You kept replaying the kiss that led you into his bed. How it started out curious and sweet before dissolving into passion. The way it felt when his tongue slid into your mouth, and the sound he made after, moaning quietly against your lips. You wish it all happened in a blur, but you remember everything clearly. The shift from the couch to the bed. The slow caress of his hands exploring your body, laying you bare before him. His voice, raw with desire, asked you if you wanted it, if you were sure. And when you said yes, the feel of him was hot and heavy as he pressed into you, sending a jolt of pleasure down your spine as he took you for the first time.

You couldn’t stop thinking about it—the way his touch lingered on your body, hot palms sliding up your waist, the caress of his breath on your neck, the pump of his cock inside you, bringing you closer and closer to the edge—it was all too much. You’d be lying if you said you’d never imagined being with him before. But fantasizing about it and actually experiencing it were two very different things.

At the moment, all you felt was lust and longing and another L word you weren’t quite ready to admit to yourself yet. Jeongguk left you aching in more ways than one. You didn’t think about the consequences of your actions that night, consequences that you were still facing to this day because you let things get too far.

You shook your head, clearing away your heady thoughts as you pulled your hand from his. “That night was a mistake.”

Jeongguk agreed with you on this; it was a mistake, but not for the reasons you might think. It was his fault for moving too fast, closing the gap between you to steal a kiss that turned into so much more. He should have waited, taken things slow. Jeongguk knew he was falling quicker than you, that you weren’t ready to meet him halfway, to let him catch you when you fell, but he gave into the heat of the mommet.

He didn’t regret it. The sex was mind-blowing, the best he’d ever had, but he’d throw the whole night away if it meant he could keep you by his side.

Jeongguk took a step toward you. “Maybe,” he said. “But I can’t act like it didn’t happen.”

You frowned at his admission. Your relationship never should’ve gotten this complicated. You had rules to avoid this kind of thing:

No meetings outside of work. Keep things strictly business.

No PDA outside of the public eye.

No contact after the end of your contract. Cut off all communication once the publicity stunt was over.

You remember Jungkook teased you when you came up with the rules. “Don’t fall in love with me,” he laughed, a smug grin on his face. At the time, you waved him off with a scoff. Jeongguk’s reputation was his own warning label, the long list of broken hearts that trailed behind him like a big, sad, red flag. As if you’d ever fall for such a man? He was everything you didn’t want in a partner: egotistical, selfish, immature.

Except, as you got to know him, Jeongguk ended up being none of those things. And you ended up breaking every rule except for the last one. You became friends, or so you had thought until you landed in bed with him. Worst of all—you developed feelings for him. And you knew no matter what happened that night, Jeongguk wasn’t capable of feeling the same way.

You’ve always placed too much importance on love, a romantic to a fault. You hoped it would find you at the right time, with the right person—whatever this was with Jeongguk didn’t fall into either category. It was all wrong, not on your terms, not how you thought it should be. You weren’t about to risk your heart with LA’s most notorious fuckboy when you’d finally reached the height of your career.

So now you were desperately clinging to the last rule. It was silly to want to adhere to the rules after the fact. You knew that. But right now, that rule was the only thing keeping you from falling off into the deep end.

You held out your hand, keeping him at arm’s length. “I think we should stop while we’re ahead. Before anyone gets hurt.”

Before I get hurt.

You didn’t miss the pained look on his face at your words. “Is that really what you think of me? After everything we’ve been through, you still think I’d hurt you?

“You will,” you said, shrugging. “Not on purpose, but you will. When you lose interest, when this novice interest wears off, you’ll go back to being who you are.”

“If you ran from me because you think I’d change my mind and regret it, I don’t.”

His words hit you with a wave of relief, but you shoved those feelings down deep. Your mind flashed back to the night things fell apart. When you slipped out of Jeongguk’s arms and rummaged for your clothes on his bedroom floor before sneaking out the door. Not your finest moment. But you couldn’t stay and fall in love with someone who could only pretend to love you back.

“I don’t wanna hear this,” you said, rounding on your heel quick to make your way back downstairs.

Jeongguk didn’t miss a beat. He followed you, long legs effortlessly keeping up with your strides.

“I’m not the same man I was when you met me. Or at least, I don’t wanna be. Just give me a chance to prove that I can be better.”

“Funny, I don’t remember that being part of the contract,” you said, voice clipped.

“Will you give it up already? The contracts over,” said Jeongguk, frustration leaking into his voice. “I’m not pretending. Haven’t been for a long time.”

Jeongguk stopped faking it months ago. It was long before the night you slept together when he realized he wasn’t holding your hand because someone was taking a photograph—but because he wanted to. For so long, having you around and keeping you close was all feeding into a perception. The false romance the media spun about you. But now, that perception was more like reality than anything else. Because something about your hand in his felt right.

He wouldn’t let you walk away, not again.

“I don’t care that the contract’s over; I don’t want you out of my life,” he said.

You stopped in your tracks, frozen by his words. Jeongguk knew this was the only chance he’d get, so he ran with it. He crossed over in front of you, words tumbling from his mouth before you could get away.  

“After all that time we spent together, it was strange not having you by my side. It felt wrong. Even playing music didn’t feel right without you singing by my side in harmony. You’re my best friend, and I can’t stand having you ignore me. But I don’t wanna go back to the way things were before. That. . .that night changed everything.” He licked his lips, preparing himself to say the words in his heart that he’d been keeping in for so long now. “Y/n, I—”

“Stop,” you said, voice breaking at the end. “Stop saying things like that, stop—”

Making me fall for you, you thought. . .You were so afraid of Jeongguk’s next words, what hearing them might do to you.  

Jeongguk could see it. “What are you so afraid of?”

A million things. I’m afraid that if we do this, I’ll be the one who loves most. Like all the others before, I’m afraid you’ll grow tired of me and move on to the next pretty bright star. I’m afraid that we’ll ruin the relationship, that everything good between us will end, and that you’ll never speak to me again when it does.

But how could you say that? How could you even begin? You’d never been good at stating your feelings and putting your emotions out there—and that was without love in the equation.

So instead, you said: “I just wanna be friends.”

Jeongguk sighed. “Well, I don’t want that. I don’t wanna be your friend; I want something deeper. And I think you want that, too.”

Something about that statement and the yearning look in his eyes made your heart stutter.

“You don’t mean that,” you said, ignoring his comment about your wants, your desires.

“I do,” he said. “I want more. I want us.”

You faltered, taking a step back as Jeongguk moved towards you. He said all the right things, everything you wanted to hear, everything you hoped for, but you couldn’t believe it because of everything he said before.

You could still hear his voice. The warning. The laugh.

Don’t fall in love with me.

You shook your head. “You’re not exactly the relationship type. You said it yourself, don’t even believe in love.”

“That was before you,” he said.

You sucked in a sharp breath. How could Jeongguk have changed his mind so quickly? What game was he playing? The idea that he could switch on and off his emotions upset you.

“No,” you said, denial switching into anger. “You don’t get to do that. You don’t get to make up your own rules—”

“Fuck the damn rules,” Jeongguk closed the gap between you, grabbed you by the waist, and kissed you. All your protests went out of your mind the minute his mouth was on yours. Jeongguks lips were soft as they worked against yours. This kiss was better than the one that started this mess. Better and maybe worse, because then at least you’d been able to tell yourself it was a one-off. But this? This kiss wasn’t an accident.

Jeongguk was intentional with his caress, his hand coming up to cup the back of your neck, kissing you deeper, kissing you senseless. Slow and sensual, but also like he’d fuck you on this roof if he could. Hell, it felt so good you might just let him. For a second, you gave in, leaning into his touch and the delicious feel of his solid body against yours. You moaned at the sensation, and the sound of your own voice, high and needy, broke the spell.

“I can’t do this,” you panted, chest still heaving as you came up for air.

Jeongguk rested his forehead against yours, grip still tight on your waist. “Don’t run from me again. Please.”

You felt yourself splitting in two, torn between wanting to be with him and protect your heart.

There must be something wrong with you—why were you so frightened? How broken were you that you’d turn away from love the first chance you got? Here it was, right in front of you, and yet, you couldn’t bring yourself to reach out and grab it.

You didn’t want these feelings. You hated getting this emotional that Jeongguk could have this much power over you.

But if you were really honest with yourself, you’d never be ready for a love like his. A love so all-consuming. You wished your feelings didn’t run so deep. But you couldn’t fight it; it’s like you were cursed. All you could do was run from it.

“I have to go,” you said, shifting in his embrace.

“Will you just listen to me—”

“I have!” You said, voice cracking. “I have been listening! I’ve been sitting beside you for all the interviews, press, and parties, and I know you tell people what they want to hear. You know how to say the right thing at the right time, but rarely is it ever the truth.”

“That’s different, and you know it. What I feel for you is real.”

“All of this started on a lie, so how could it be real?”

Jeongguk took your hand and pressed it against his heart. You could feel its rapid beat underneath your palm. “Look me in the eye and tell me you don’t feel this.”

“I feel nothing,” you said. But you gave yourself away. You bit your lip. And Jeongguk knew your tell.

“You’re lying,” He growled. Jeongguk could feel you slipping away, but he didn’t know how to keep you with him. “What do I have to say to get you to see that I’m in this? That I want it?”

It didn’t matter what he said. You couldn’t give in to the ache. You couldn’t trust him with your heart.

“I have to go,” you repeated. You pushed at Jeongguk’s shoulders, breaking from his grasp.

“There’s something here, something real between us, and you’re too scared to see it through.”

Maybe he was right, but you wouldn’t change your mind. You wouldn’t wait for Jeongguk to grow tired of you and kick you to the curb. No, you wouldn’t even give him a chance. You’d do it first.

You looked away from him, unable to stand the pleading in his eyes. “Don’t make this harder than it has to be.” A single tear rolled down your cheek. “Just let me go,” you said, swiping at your face as you stepped back.

“(Y/n), please,” he whispered, voice quiet but fierce. “Don’t do this. Stay.”  

There was an ache, deep down in your bones, everything in you begging you to let him in, to see what could be. But you wouldn’t walk back towards him.

“I’m sorry,” you said, tears blurring your vision as you escaped, nearly tripping in your heels as you ran down the stairs to the ongoing party below.

As you made your way through the bedazzled crowd, you tried to convince yourself you were doing the right thing.

I’m better off, you thought. You weren’t in a place right now to be in a relationship, and neither was Jeongguk. It was better to end things before they got out of hand, before there was irreparable damage, wasn’t it?

And you had work to do, didn’t you? Ending things this way might hurt now, but you could distract yourself from the pain. There was still your busy schedule on tour. You’d be on the road, bouncing from city to city. With the time apart, your feelings would fade into nothing, and you’d be able to be in the same room with him without feeling like your heart would leap out of your throat.

You were certain that you’d have your emotions under control the next time you saw his face.

By the time you reached the door, you had almost convinced yourself that you were better off without him.

[doeilovr]

Request: Hello angel. I've been feeling really nostalgic and I was wondering if you could do a nostalgic moment with NCT 👉👈

a/n: I randomly picked nine nct members :3 hope it turned out okay!

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TAEYONG

He feels like going to an Amusement park as a child, when most of the rides still look way too scary and you opt for things like the carousel and bumper cars instead. He is the smell of cotton candy and the sound of children laughing and shouting out of joy.

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JOHNNY

He feels like summer vacations. Maybe you always spent them at the same hotel or the same little house and after all these years have passed you can still see your younger self running into the house and up the stairs to pick the best room. And after you've grown so much and time has passed for you and the people you go on vacation with have changed, it still seems like the house hasn't changed one bit and that somehow feels right.

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JUNGWOO

It's the feeling of suddenly hearing a song again you used to play up and down as a child, realizing that you have sang the wrong lyrics all along. Hearing a song that used to play at a party you attended once or one that played when you heard something you weren't supposed to hear and always associating the song with that event even until now.

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RENJUN

He is the memories and feelings that come flooding back as you walk past your old school or the neighborhood you used to live in. You still see yourself running around the school yard or eating your lunch as fast as possible so you could play with your friends.

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JAEMIN

He feels like taking a picture with a disposable camera. You don't know if it will turn out good, in fact, you're shaking a little from laughing as you take a picture of your friends and wonder if they'll even be in frame. Nevertheless you take another one and another one until you run out of film.

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CHENLE

He feels like seeing a movie you used to love as a child. Whenever you had the chance you would watch it and even now you could recall the whole movie and even quote some lines. He feels like the movies that you watched at your friends house for the first time, calling them your favorite movie of all time, only to then never watch them again.

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SHOTARO

He's like those old games you could play only at amusement parks or arcades. Or the games your friends owned that you were a little jealous of and always requested to play whenever you came over. He feels like the soundtrack to the games that you used to love and now would, every time you heard them, remind you of those days.

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WINWIN

He somehow reminds me of evenings filled with good food and laughter, a dish only your grandmother or your aunt could make that had the whole table eat two or even three plates that's how good it was. The sound of the TV in the background which you could barely hear due to your relatives talking absurdly loud at the table.

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HENDERY

He feels like the moment you try to clean up your mess of a room but then getting distracted as you stumble upon the flute you used to play in elementary school for two months. Or discovering old photos of yourself that were way too embarrassing. And finding old diaries and things like a bag that still had gummy bears from four years ago and continuing to sit on the floor as you read words written by your ten year old self as you snack on expired jelly.

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a/n: okay I tried smth different here and I kinda like it :) also what a cute idea! Let me know what makes you feel nostalgic and tell me anon if you expected a specific member :3

tagging: @shrutiajit

[c-crow-chatters]

Music headcannons.

Hi, it's me again.

I was a bit lost in tought when this popped out. So, please enjoy. Also, thank you for all your love on the last post. And I almost forgot, obviously an Modern!AU. Forgive any spelling mistakes again.

What kind of music they listen to?

Has a very flexible music taste. But most of the time, Indie or Pop. One day he's listening to the whole discography of Mitski, the other one is enjoying Lady Gaga.

Probably listens to Olivia Rodrigo a lot.

Dances when he's alone, or enjoys in a calm way melancholic lyrics.

If a movie is catchy enough, you'll see this man searching deeply for it's soundtrack.

Gently sways to jazz while cooking. Loves to hum melodies while taking the pastries from the oven. I think if he had the time to, he would open a cafeteria so he can listen to the songs that are lit in the moment while making desserts or pouring coffee.

His favorite song is probably: It's been a long long time by Harry James.

Oldies, pop-rock, or rock. Sometimes dance or metal. Doesn't mind trying new genres or music that is completely opposite of his usual mix. Often is being influenced by Sypha's choices of music.

No, Trevor, listening to Gorillaz every day doesn't make you that special, but you are to us.

If he's feeling a little blue, he'll listen to Artic Monkeys.

Would like to try and play the bass or guitar, but too lazy to actually go and take classes.

Doesn't like to burst the music out loud unless it's a party, prefers to use earbuds to listen. Sometimes he falls asleep while listening to some track and ends up losing an earbud.

Actually likes to slow-dance on the living room in a quiet evening.

His favorite song is Through the Fire and Flames by Dragonforce, but he keeps denying it.

Pop, dance and electro-swing queen. No matter what song, she'll make a bop out of it. Energetic dances all over. There's also Lo-Fi.

She SLAYS on Just Dance, or any kind of dance game. She very much enjoys them.

Yes, she also likes K-pop, really likes HIP by Mamamoo and knows the whole choreography.

Pretty much sings too. Madonna? bring it on! Britney Spears? of course, The Weeknd? yes.

Mostly songs that are lively, or full of rythm. She knows what songs are lit on the moment, and her playlists are variant. The playlist she made with Trevor is a constant mood swing. She keeps teasing him by how it changed from "Hips Don't Lie" to "Careless Whisper".

Her favorite song is Single ladies (Put a Ring On It) by Beyoncé.

This man's taste goes from Panic! At the Disco to videogames soundtracks. Alt rock, lullabies, Ambient.

While he does handmade jewelry he loves to listen It's raining somewhere else by Toby Fox.

He actually knows how to play piano basics. And flute lol, jk-.

Plays music on the studio or work, often searches for music for his pets too. He's more into the calm side of music, but sometimes explores other genres.

Alt rock goes from Radiohead to Fall Out Boy.

His favorite song is in between Doubt by Twenty One Pilots and Pompeii by Bastille.

Blues, Jazz, and classical music. He also listens to traditional music.

Definetly drinks tea or coffee while sitting on a big couch, letting Lacrimosa by Ludwig van Beethoven flow in the air.

Quiet, starry nights, watching the city from the balcony of his apartment, soft piano and bass in his phone or a small speaker. Meditates with calm breathing.

Most of the time listens while reading. He doesn't like to use apps, or so, since he has a gramophone and a cassette player; both are very old, but are very well cared of.

He doesn't like to dance, but will sway or rock gently if he's really into an specific song.

Has an alarm clock with The Four Seasons that wakes him every morning. A big Vivaldi fan.

His favorite song is Requiem: II, Dies Irae by Giuseppe Verdi.

[zorilleerrant]

I’m sorry I’m not done - it’s just so good to see an Asian family that’s like. Kamala’s still got pressures and expectations but it’s not the whole. Dragon Lady thing. there’s like - they’re blaming themselves, they’re trying to change things, they’re controlling the circumstances and where she’s allowed. not forcing her to play the flute and learn fourteen languages.

and I mean yeah there are Asian families like that but it feels like it’s the only kind white people think of? and instead now we’ve got these parents that are strict in some senses (but not! so strict Kamala can never do anything! just regular medium strict!) but they’re also so sweet and caring and they make sure to take care of her and her friends and it’s just so adorable. and it’s going to be a major plot point that’s a clash of them being too controlling but in a normal teen rebellion way not an Evil Queen trapping her with magic kind of way? and I feel like, especially for Asians, that’s unique in a story

plus the fact that her parents are clearly parenting together, and it’s not like, oh, haha, the mean asian lady has her husband’s balls in a vice and he doesn’t know what to do. it’s like. they’re parents! they’re her parents and they love her and care about her and want to make sure she has a good life! and they’re both putting in effort, separately and together! also the fact that they love each other, which you really never see regardless of race so I really appreciate that facet of the thing, too, a loving relationship between parents instead of yet another married couple sniping at each other

and I liked how it’s not all white gazey, and I don’t even mean in the sense of that. there are people who know what they’re talking about on all the creative aspects of the show. (because we do like to see ownvoices, obv, it’s great, but that’s not the part I mean.) it’s the thing where it’s not busy explaining all the bits and pieces of culture to the audience, but it’s also not avoiding them. it’s not justifying them or exaggerating them to make it all exotic. and especially Kamala’s friend knowing about some cultural stuff and getting used to it because he knows her and they hang out! he learned it! and they don’t all interact precisely in one way about it. they just have a culture and their own relationships with it and we get to see that

also the soundtrack. I don’t have anything interesting to say about it I just really enjoyed it and the sound design choices worked and I like the songs