#i love stories exploring more complex relationships with the sides

[creatingblackcharacters]

It's hard to pick just one favorite Black character but the one I spend the most time thinking about (like everyday) is Ramona Royale from American Horror Story: Hotel.

She's a former Blaxploitation actress who meets the Countess, a vampire woman (played by Lady Gaga) at her hotel in the late 70s and falls in love with her and lets her turn her. They have a 15-year-long relationship but things fall apart and Ramona begins to date a rapper named Prophet Moses instead, who then gets killed by the Countess and so she spends the rest of the season plotting her revenge. In between their breakup and her return to the hotel, she also cares for her parents until they eventually die and she finds herself having to adjust to a world vastly different from the one she lived in before she met the Countess.

She's my favorite for many reasons, not least of all because she's played by my favorite actress Angela Bassett, but also because she is canonically bisexual and a vampire I mean how much better could it get? Even though I think the script did not give her enough to work with and she's kind of a side character, I think there's a lot of depth and complexity to her and Angela's acting alone conveys this so beautifully. Her inner conflict of wanting to hurt the Countess for how she hurt her but at the same time still being enamored by her because they once considered each other the loves of their lives. How she contradicts herself in an attempt to appear confident and ruthless even though she cares so much about the people she loves, like her dad and Liz, her friend, who's also a trans woman (tho unfortunately played by a man. No news that AHS has its issues 💀).

I just love exploring the different layers of her and possible like roots of her feelings if that makes sense. E.g. the show didn't tell us why her relationship with the Countess started crumbling but there are lines that imply that loss of other loved ones and grief had a lot to do with it. I love how she has me digging into 70s culture and Blaxploitation movies. I love her humor, I love her friendships with the other characters who live in the hotel, I love her strength in fighting for her survival, I love picturing her dancing in the disco with the Countess when they were still happily in love.

I'm getting emotional thinking about how much she means to me. She is bold and fierce and vulnerable and loving and gorgeous and funny and not afraid to go after what she wants. In her own words, she's a lady and badass. She's even a little shy at the beginning of her relationship with the Countess, and Angela has said that this was her first relationship with a woman and it was beautiful.

I've never been in the AHS fandom but from what I've seen she is very underappreciated, especially as a canon queer character, and imo she just always deserves more love.

Marie Laveau and Desiree Dupree from the other seasons are just as iconic to me but Ramona will always have a special place in my heart 💜

(Sorry this got so long, I'm terrible at keeping things brief 😭)

You just reminded me that I don't think I ever finished this season! I don't even remember Angela and that's a sin! God and she's so fine. Like whew Ms. Bassett 😍😤🤌🏾🔥😫 I definitely need to go back then, this sounds really... Wow like I missed a lot. I'm kind of sad I missed this storyline 😭 I'm glad it meant so much to you. I personally am a huge fan of Marie Laveau, myself, mainly bc I loved watching Angela working with Jessica Lange; they ate up that dynamic that season. Any fandom that doesn't appreciate Angela Bassett doesn't deserve her, even though I am not in that fandom and I don't think I'd want to be!

[skrunksthatwunk]

haruka should be allowed to be mad at kiryu tbh

[thegirlwhorideslikeasamurai]

On Yuuri's "top-secret" love life

I took the time to look deeper into the information YOI gives us about Yuuri's history with love and what it means for the story of YOI.

Let's start from the scene in which Viktor introduces the two Yuris to their new short programmes:

It struck me as curious that a 23-year-old has never thought about love. The average person has their first crushes in puberty, enforcing a first examination of the subject of love to some extent.

YOI portrays Yuuri as being evasive when feeling pushed or embarrassed, but when Viktor asks him whether he ever thought about love, all we get from him is this utterly clueless expression. In this context, his interpretation of Agape is very interesting:

Yuuri is projecting his own experiences with love into his interpretation of On Love: Agape and Eros. This becomes even clearer when he comments Eros with nothing but "It's a totally different song". I've discussed this in more detail here, for this discussion let it be suffice it to say that his answers reflect where he is currently at in his journey of exploring love.

Japanese language uses different words for different kinds of love. The general all-encompassing concept of love is 愛 ("ai"), the romantic/passionate love is 恋 ("koi"). These terms very roughly approximate the Greek concepts of agape and eros as they are utilised in YOI. However, YOI doesn't draw the distinction between 愛 and 恋 , but discusses love as 愛 ("ai") that entails other forms of love, including even eros せいてきな愛 ("sexual love").

Until the moment Viktor introduces both Yuris to their new short programmes, Yuuri has never wasted a thought on love. Which means:

Until the end of episode 2, Yuuri has never had romantic feelings for another person.

Why can we be so sure of that?

Even a first crush enforces an examination of love; the result of that is often very naive and immature but becomes more complex and nuanced with experience. The romantic feelings that come with a romantic crush are impossible to miss since they take over one's heart and soul like wildfire. Even if one's feelings aren't reciprocated or one decides to not act upon them, an examination of the subject "love" inevitably happens driven by heartbreak or the sentiment that it's better not to pursue this person and wanting them to be happy.

Therefore, if Yuuri had experienced such feelings before episode 2/3, he would know. And we would know, too, because it would impact his views on love, how he tackles his season's theme, and how he goes about his relationship with Viktor. Since love is a central theme in YOI, a past love, whether it had been happy, tragic, or unreciprocated, must be addressed in a way that does it justice because it would affect the entire course of Yuuri's character journey. It would require an exploration of past Yuuri either being happy with a past lover, or heartbroken because the relationship ended or because the feelings were one-sided. And this would alter his approach to his season's theme and help him figure out his feelings for Viktor because he would already be familiar with it. However, YOI does nothing like that. Instead, it introduces us to the extent of Yuuri's obsession with Viktor in a lengthy flashback, which is the start of a long-term parasocial relationship that is very gay-coded but too abstract to qualify as a romantic crush (see also here). The only flashback into one's love life in the entire anime is, of all things, about Georgi as a contrasting juxtaposition to viktuuri.

For the story of YOI to work in the way it does, Yuuri never having had romantic feelings is crucial.

Yuuri shows all the sings of a monotropic mind. Since he discovered Viktor at the onset of puberty, his entire existence revolved around Viktor as the anime shows us in abundance. For his endeavour to meet Viktor as an equal on the ice with the GPF being the disastrous culmination of his efforts, he even went to a training facility abroad. Such a strong focus doesn't particularlry motivate people to forming deeper connections and let's not forget that Yuuri is an introvert. He is more interested in skating (to pursue Viktor) than spending time with his friends, not that he's great at forming relationships in the first place because Yuuri is also super awkward.

Sometimes, friendship, admiration and aesthetic attraction (aka finding someone pretty, cute etc.) are being misconstrued as romantic feelings due to allonormative/amatonormative paradigms. While it's true that starting from a young age, Yuuri idolises people who inspire him (憧れの人 = "someone to look up to/admire", in the subs translated as "idol"), Yuuri's in both cases very gay-coded admiration holds no romantic or sexual connotation, except for the parasocial romanticism in his lifelong quest to emulate Viktor and become his equal (not that the parasocial is the aspect here).

The press conference at the end of episode 5 comprises Yuuri's journey of exploring love and provides a deeper insight in his views on love.

Since the subs are low-key confusing, I'm not quoting them, but you can check this translation done by a Japanese fan that explains all the nuances the official translation misses. The part I want to point out in particular is this one:

My love. It’s not [general] love or romantic love that is easy to understand, but my bond with Victor, and the lukewarm way I feel about my family and my local community.

Note that this is the only time the anime uses 恋 ("koi"), probably because he's speaking to a Japanese audience.

This is the part where his friends feel offended. It showcases how Yuuri feels about the other people in his life, confirming what we could already guess: that none of these people ever reached a level at which he would develop intimate feelings for them and let them into his heart in one or the other way. All the people who supported him, first in Hasetsu and later in Detroit. Let that sink in. That's why before Vikor became he coach, he always felt that he was always fighting alone. (I don't blame Yuuri for his poor wording because it would only downplay his mental struggles and their ramifications.)

Yuuri talks about the concept of love as a whole, showcasing that he has come a long way from episode 2 and now has reached a stage where he has a mature and nuanced idea of it. He reveals that he grasps romantic love (恋) and general love (愛) easily, which is another huge progress compared to his absolute cluelessness in episode 2 and another hint that he hasn't yet experienced a situation that prompted an examination of the subject prior to it.

At the same time, Yuuri draws a clear distinction between his feelings for his family and friends and his feelings for Viktor, which aren't lukewarm at all.

A more accurate translation of this line is: "The first person I want to tie myself to and never let go is Viktor". Here, the fan translation explicitly points out that the phrasing is a reference to the scene in episode 2 when Viktor learns from the Nishigoris about Yuuri's struggles to form friendships and to be more interested in skating than in spending time with his friends. (Having written all this, I wonder how much he considered his friends as friends in the first place because philia is also a form of love that is implicitly included in "ai".)

After months of getting to know Viktor intimately, Yuuri has fallen in love with Viktor at last. This feeling is bigger than any emotion he has experienced before because it's greater than 恋 and 愛 and because of that:

This feeling doesn't have a name, but I decided to dare to call it "love".

Although Yuuri is awkward and anxious, there is one quality that stands out above all: his ambition to pursue a goal he is committed to. For half his life this has been Viktor, first as an abstract concept and as an ideal to strive for, later as a romantic interest. If he wants something, he makes sure to get it and he's unstoppable in his pursuit even when he hits rock bottom his desire to skate on the same ice as Viktor again right before Viktor showed up proves. If Yuuri had had romantic feelings for someone else, he would have pursued this person or ruled out the idea because Viktor was more important, which would have impacted his views on love either way.

Or in other words:

Viktor is Yuuri's first love.

Yuuri's love life is not as secret as YOI claims it is. His refusal to discuss it when Viktor pried for information, suggests embarrassment about the fact that at the age of 23, he is totally inexperienced in this regard while other people already have children or had a couple of partners. He's definitely not embarrassed to show the world how much he loves Viktor.

I will discuss the gay-coding of how Yuuri idolises people that inspire him in another post because this seems to be one of the lesser known facts.

Disclaimer: This analysis is based on what is supported by canon. Of course you are free to headcanon Yuuri as having had crushes before Viktor, but keep in mind that this would alter the plot of YOI to some extent.

[erisweekofficial]

We're thrilled to shine a light on @zenkindoflove!!! Amanda is an absolute gem in the Elucien fandom AND Eris fandom and has also blessed us with Alexius, her incredible OC for her Eris x OC fics.

Alexius stands out as one of the few male OCs in the community, and the dynamic between him and Eris is nothing short of captivating. Think forced proximity, delicious yearning, witty banter, political intrigue, and all the tension you could dream of. You can see them in both Summer Heat (which has Elucien) and Pull Me in Deeper, which... y'all you gotta read this asap😍🤭🥵 Also the mods are begging you to read Taste of You, a short and delightfully smutty one shot.

And PLEASE admire this amazing art of Alexius and Eris!

Read more to learn about how @zenkindoflove was inspired to create content about Eris AND her extremely helpful tips for writing content about him. (We're taking notes)

What inspired you to start creating content about Eris?  I became curious about writing Eris after he was featured in some of my Elucien fics. When I started my multichapter Elucien fic Summer Heat, I decided that I would give him a male love interest in that fic and create an OC - which ended up being Alexius who you see featured in all of my Eris work. I originally intended for it to be a background relationship, but I decided to experiment and write the scene of their first meeting (a very smutty scene) just to do some character exploration. I didn’t intend to include it in the fic, but then once I wrote it, I knew that it was something special and Eris x Alexius became a true B storyline in that fic with a fully fleshed out love story. After that, I wanted to expand and write fics that focused on them which I've written several now and more to come for Eris Week! It's a bit niche. Hardly anyone writes Eris x Male OC but I'm obsessed now.

What's your favorite piece you've created featuring Eris and why? 

That would be my Eris x Alexius multichapter fic - Pull Me in Deeper. I love it because it was a way for me to explore Eris’ character when he is out of the watchful eye of his father and others in Prythian. It’s also just a fun action/adventure/romance story and I got to explore more lore and character building for my OC Alexius as well. Alexius was designed to be, in my opinion, the perfect person for Eris and that means often standing in contrast to a lot of his personality traits and pushing him outside of his comfort zone. So it was an incredibly fun dynamic to explore. And it’s two gay men who are on a quest to find out (*spoilers*) if unicorns exist XD.

How do you approach writing dialogue for Eris? 

I tend to lean into Eris being more careful with his words - so he is sharp, concise, and efficient in his word choice. Depending on who he’s sharing a scene with and the context, he can be severe and short or he can be long-winded and eloquent. And of course, he has banter and jabs a plenty. So I try to balance all those sides of him depending on the context.

Do you have any advice for other creators wanting to make Eris content? 

Eris inhabits a unique space in canon where he is truly a free agent when it comes to relationships. So, I would recommend if you want to write romances with Eris to lean into self-indulgence and write the pairing/story you really want to tell and try to let go of what you think will be popular. And if that ends up being Eris x OC rather than a canon character, know that it can actually be such a rewarding experience even if you don’t have a built in audience. Creating an OC to pair with Eris has been immensely fun and has broadened my creativity. Eris is a complex, interesting character with so many layers and building someone to fit him and find out what is underneath all of those layers can lead you down quite an obsessive path. But a fun one. 

Please give us a name for one of Eris’s Brothers

Kian. He is the third oldest and is more of a scholarly type. Now that second brother Conan is dead, he is next in line after Eris.

Please give us a name for one of Eris's Dogs.

Lithia. She just had puppies in PMID and Eris is worried about her. 

[a-court-of-fics-and-errors]

Keep Moving Forwards, Part 45

Azriel x Reader Fic

Summary: After finally deciding to leave your abusive and manipulative mate for good, you find unexpected companionship with Azriel, the Shadowsinger of the Night Court. As you navigate the aftermath of your traumatic relationship, you struggle to understand where the mating bond went wrong and contemplate your path forward, vowing never to return to the past.

Find other parts here: Master List

To follow this fic, follow tag "Keep Moving Forwards Fic" or comment to be tagged in future parts.

Content Warning: This story contains depictions of extreme emotional manipulation and abuse, detailed descriptions of direct physical abuse, and scenes of men hunting women with implied sexual assault. Please read at your own risk.

Word Count: 2.8K

Author's Note: This is a multi-part series. Unlike my previous works, this fanfiction delves deeper than just fluff, exploring complex emotional landscapes. As I navigate this new writing journey, I kindly ask for gentle feedback. The topics addressed are profoundly impactful, touching many lives with diverse experiences. Please be gentle with yourselves and others. Healing is a journey, and everyone processes it differently. Be kind to yourself. Take what resonates, and leave what doesn’t.

Please continue reading, being aware of the above content warnings, ensuring you are in a healthy headspace. Give yourself time to process and be gentle with yourself.

Without warning, he appeared in your office, his footsteps silent but his scent overwhelming. You turned to face him before he even reached you, the papers on your desk forgotten as you drank in the sight of him. His black curls were tousled and swept to one side, like he had been running his hands through them. His hazel eyes locked onto yours and a half smile tugged at the corners of his lips - a look that was reserved just for you. Without a word, you closed the distance between you with barely a touch of your feet on the ground, wrapping your arms around his strong, muscled frame. You buried your nose in the soft fabric of his shirt, inhaling deeply the familiar scent that you had been missing for weeks. Azriel's own arms enveloped you, his chin resting on top of your head as he pressed a gentle kiss into your hair. As if trying to convince himself that this was real, he moved his fingers across your shoulders, pressing against your skin with tenderness and love.

You finally looked up at him through teary eyes and whispered, "Hi."

A small chuckle escaped his throat before he responded with a simple "Hey."

On your tip toes, you met his half smile with a kiss that conveyed all the longing and desire that had built up during your time apart. Azriel eagerly returned the kiss, his lips molding against yours with a softness that made your heart swell. His hands shifted, one coming to rest on the small of your back while the other tangled itself in your hair, pulling you closer to him. Your arms circled around his neck as you went limp in his embrace, almost hanging off of him as he held you tight. In that moment, it felt like there was no space between the two of you - like you were one entity instead of two separate beings. Azriel's kisses became more fervent, his nose scrunching as if he wanted to get even closer to you. His fingers moved through your hair with a tenderness that left you weak in the knees. He squeezed you tighter, and you let out a contented sigh into his mouth before he finally pulled away, not fully releasing you but letting you stand on your own two feet again.

When you opened your eyes, Azriel was smiling down at you, his lips still puckered from the kiss as if trying to hold onto the taste of you. "If that's how you always greet me, we should spend more time apart," you said playfully, causing him to chuckle and press another quick kiss to your lips.

Azriel gave another half smile, chuckling, but behind his eyes seemed a sadness you couldn’t quite place, some sort of grief. You leaned back farther to take him in, the skin around his eyes tightened slightly, faint shadows underneath keyed you into the many sleepless nights he’d had as well. But there was something more lurking beneath the surface.

“What’s wrong?” You asked, your brow arching slightly as you reached your hands up to cup his face, feeling the roughness of his stubble against your palms.

A heavy sigh escaped Azriel's lips, causing his shoulders to slump and a tight smile to form on his face. "I just missed you," he said, but there was something in his gaze that didn't quite match the words. Your stomach twisted with a sense of unease as you searched his face for any clue of what was bothering him, what secret he was carrying on those broad shoulders.

"What are you doing here?" You asked, your own smile turning into a light laugh. "Does Rhys know you're here?"

Azriel nodded, "He sent me to get you."

Hope bloomed in your chest. Perhaps this meant the solution to your problem had finally been found and all the waiting was over. But Azriel's demeanor gave you pause. "I can come home?" you asked hopefully, wanting to see some sign of celebration from him. But instead, you felt his fingers tense against your back, as though he couldn't bring himself to say the words.

His reply came slowly, as if he was carefully selecting each word. You studied his face, noticing how his lips parted slightly before closing again, as if he wanted to say more but decided against it. This went on for several moments before you finally interrupted him, unable to bear the tension any longer. "Azriel," you began hesitantly, "What's going on?"

Azriel let out another sigh, his eyes locked on yours as if trying to convey something without speaking. It felt like watching his heart break right in front of you. "Eris has called a meeting," he finally said.

Your brow furrowed in confusion, not because Eris had called a meeting, but because you had been invited to attend. After weeks of silence and assuming that Rhysand was working on solving the issue at hand, you were expecting him to show up one day and declare everything resolved. And yet here was Azriel, tense and anxious, telling you there was a meeting. "And I'm supposed to go to this meeting?" you asked, your heart beginning to race.

Azriel swallowed hard, as if struggling to get the words out. "Yes. Both Rhysand and Eris want you there."

You leaned back against him, not wanting to leave his embrace but needing some space to process everything and avoid vomiting on Azriel’s chest. "Why?" you asked, feeling heat rise in your cheeks. "Can you please stop being cryptic and just tell me what's going on? This dancing around the issue isn't helping."

"There are decisions that will be made and they feel that you should be a part of them," Azriel answered carefully.

Frustration simmered within you as you replied, "Well then just tell me. Keeping me in the dark is only making things worse."

"Look, Y/N," he pleaded with a hint of desperation in his voice, his eyes searching yours for some kind of understanding. “Can we please just be in this moment right now?” Instead of providing the solace you so yeared for, his words only heightened the frantic beating of your heart against your ribcage. His face softened, but it was a struggle to do so. It was etched with grief and sorrow, and you could feel the tension in his hands as they clenched onto your sweater as if it were the only anchor keeping him grounded. Unable to block him out, you gave a hesitant nod and leaned back into his embrace. However, this time there was no sense of euphoria like before. Instead, you remained acutely aware of every little detail as you pressed your cheek against his chest, feeling the rapid thump of his own heartbeat just inches beneath your skin.

This reunion was nothing like what you had imagined. In your mind's eye, the two of you were supposed to be wrapped in each other's arms with gentle embraces and passionate kisses. You would have playfully pushed him down in excitement, straddling him as you showered him with soft kisses until he couldn't stop grinning from ear to ear, his glorious laugh echoing around the room from deep in his belly.

But now, your bodies were pressed tightly together as if trying to merge into one being out of fear that someone might come along and rip you apart. The silence between you was heavy and suffocating, neither of you daring to break it as rain poured down outside. It wasn't until this moment that you even realized it had started raining, the sound of thunder rumbling in the background unnoticed until now. How long had this storm been raging?

—

Despite the relentless rain pelting against the windows, Azriel insisted on taking a walk through Velaris with you. Donning jackets and umbrellas, you stepped out into the soggy cobblestone streets, hand in hand. As you looked up at him from under the brim of your umbrella, the raindrops hitting your face, you could see the tight lines of a smile on Azriel's face. It seemed as though he was trying to etch every moment into his memory, soaking in the sight of you with all its curves and edges. But instead of feeling like love and desire, it felt like desperation and pain radiating off of him. You pushed those thoughts aside, determined to enjoy this walk with him.

As you splashed through puddles and joked around, trying to lighten the mood, you couldn't shake off the persistent fear that lurked in the back of your mind. So when Azriel released your hand to splash through another puddle, you shot him a mischievous look before taking off down the alleyway, boots slapping against the wet ground. It may have been a childish game of chase, but you did it without thinking, wanting to shift the heavy atmosphere between you.

"Where are you going?" Azriel's laughter rang out through the downpour. You turned back to him as you pulled your hood off and let the rain drench your hair.

"Come find out!" You yelled back playfully before turning on your heel and clomping down the street. Despite the heavy rain, your heart raced with excitement and anticipation as you ran through the bustling crowd of shoppers brave enough to face the storm. Excusing yourself through your laughter, you made your way towards an abandoned side street, knowing that Azriel would easily spot your bright red jacket among the dull browns of the other citizens.

As you caught your breath for a moment and looked back at Azriel, you couldn't help but smile. He was making his way towards you with ease, laughing just as joyfully as you were. You took off down the street again, your boots echoing on the empty stone.

"Why do I have to chase you?!" Azriel's voice called out from behind you, but there was no hint of annoyance or malice in it, only pure happiness and the Azriel you wanted to see.

"Why not?" You yelled back, nearly slipping on the corner before catching yourself. "Why not play in the rain?"

You knew the city like the back of your hand, especially this lower income area where you spent countless hours scouting for potential projects in abandoned buildings. As you ran through the familiar streets and alleyways, you couldn't help but feel free and alive, the rain washing away all worries and fears.

You called back over your shoulder, taunting him with a sly grin on your face. The wet cobblestone street glistened under the dim streetlights as you playfully goaded, “You know, for a trained warrior, you sure are slow. Perhaps you’re more of an old male than I thought.” You could almost hear the low growl that would rumble through his chest at your mention of his age.

As you reached the corner of the dark sidestreet, you skidded to a stop, nearly slamming into Azriel who emerged from the shadows. His well-muscled form was crouched in a low stance, ready to pounce like a honed and deadly predator playing tag. The tense lines of his body and the glint in his dark eyes full of hunger. “Perhaps you forgot that I’m trained to think four steps ahead of someone running from me.” He arched a brow at you, reaching out to grab your arm. You let out a yelp as he caught the sleeve of your coat, but without missing a beat, you spun away from him, your arm slipping free as you broke into a sprint down the street. Azriel's voice called out after you in playful warning, “You’re going to freeze to death!”

“Then you better catch me!” You urged him on with laughter bubbling up inside you.

The rain came down hard and cold, searing through your skin and chilling your bones. Yet the warmth in your cheeks and the flutter in your heart drowned out any discomfort as you weaved through the maze-like streets of the city. Each turn and twist threatened to land you in a puddle of rain, but you were confident that Azriel was just steps behind you. However, when you stole a quick glance over your shoulder, the familiar silhouette with wings was no longer there. He most definitely hadn’t lost you, and now you couldn't shake the feeling of being tracked instead of chased. You slowed your pace, a mischievous smile forming on your lips as you swung open the door of an old abandoned shop. The musty smell of aged wood filled your nose as you bounded across the creaky floorboards, making your way to the back of the store. With a quick glance around, you spotted the old wooden stairs leading up to the second floor and bounded up them with ease, careful to avoid any rotted steps that could give away your location. You heard the door creak open again, followed by the heavy pounding of Azriel's footsteps across the floor below. A thrill ran through you as you darted up another flight of stairs to the third floor, entering a long hallway lined with doors. You did your best to keep the aging floorboards from creaking as you scurried down the hall, pausing at the second to last door. As you heard Azriel's footsteps getting closer and his curse when one of his feet broke through a rotten step, you couldn't resist letting out a small squeal before quickly opening the door and slipping inside. It was a large cabinet, filled with moth-eaten linens and dusty shelves. Without hesitation, you squeezed yourself into the tight space and pulled the door shut behind you with a small crack left open for air. Azriel's footsteps continued to echo across the room until they reached the stairs leading to this final floor. You held your breath as he slowly made his way down the hall, stopping at each door and listening carefully. The sound of silent spymaster steps was barely audible but you could make out door handles turning and creaking open as he searched for you in each room.

You desperately tried to slow your breathing, holding it in as you heard doors creak open and muffled footsteps approaching each room. Your heart pounded in your chest as you waited for Azriel to reach your room, but all you heard was silence. You knew he could sense your presence, taunting you by playing along and opening different doors. Your heart skipped a beat as you slammed open the cabinet door and launched yourself at Azriel, using all your strength to knock him backwards onto the floor. He let out a shout as his body hit the ground, your wet hair cascading down onto his face. Despite being caught off guard, Azriel's chiseled jaw broke into raucous laughter as he leaned back, his curls dampened by the wooden floorboards behind him. His infectious laughter caused you to burst into your own fit of giggles as you straddled him triumphantly, pushing against his shoulders with your palms. Azriel's hands rested lightly on your hips as he struggled to contain his laughter and opened his eyes to meet yours, a shit-eating grin spread across your face

"Why do you always have to be so extra?" He teasingly asked with a grin. You both were drenched from the rain, and you could hear the pitter-patter of droplets falling from your hair onto his wet shirt.

"Because it makes you smile," you retorted, playfully poking his nose. "And because sometimes you need a reminder that life isn't all serious and broody."

Azriel rolled his eyes, but couldn't hide the small smirk on his lips. "I only chase after you to make sure you don't slip and fall and break something."

You scoffed, "Please, I never fall. And let's not forget, you're currently pinned under me right now. So technically, I won this round."

Azriel gently took your hands from his chest and intertwined his fingers with yours, effortlessly holding your weight as you leaned into him. "You are insufferable," he chuckled.

You grinned mischievously, feeling a spark of joy in your heart. "And yet you choose to suffer me."

Azriel's eyes softened as he gazed back at you, "Forever."

—

You had tried to seduce Azriel inside the abandoned building, hoping to turn up the heat between you two and remove all the drenched clothes. But he stubbornly resisted, despite the obvious physical reactions he was having. He reminded you that you both needed to meet with two High Lords and suggested getting cleaned up and dressed for the meeting instead. You pouted in disappointment but eventually agreed, holding Azriel's hand as he helped you stand up. As you looked at him, you could see the burden of his secret weighing heavily on him once again. You interlaced your fingers with his, expecting to be immediately winnowed to the House of Wind but instead you met Azriel’s eyes as he looked at you with a smile that was almost apologetic. His thumb traced the back of your hand but before you could ask any questions, the world blurred around you and you found yourself surrounded by the familiar scent of Nesta and Cassian.

To my readers: My sincerest apologies for the lack of updates, life events got in the way and I wasn't able to write as much as I wanted. I know it's not an excuse for leaving you hanging, but I promise to finish this fic within the next week - that's my writing plan as of now. Thank you for sticking with me through the challenges and I hope you haven't forgotten about our protagonist's journey while waiting. Your support means everything, thank you again from the bottom of my heart.

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[drewharrisonwriter]

Life Well Loved

Status: One Shot, Complete

Summary: Dieter Bravo’s life proves that plans are overrated—and he’s never been more right about not having one.

Word Count: 12.9k words -- I KNOW! (In Monica Geller's voice)

A/N: Am I having a Dieter brain rot? Why yes, yes, I am. I know I should be writing the next chapter of Lifeline, but here we are. This story contains themes of pregnancy and navigating unexpected life changes, with emotionally intense scenes that touch on topics like potential pregnancy termination, personal doubts, and fears. Though it's mostly fluff, the narrative leans toward a hopeful and supportive direction but explores the complexities of relationships and personal growth. Because hey, it's Dieter!

Warnings: Allusion to abortion, brief mentions of substance use (past), discussions of anxiety and self-doubt, public scrutiny/social media negativity, mentions of past parental loss, minor family tensions, and emotional conversations around pregnancy. Please read with care if these subjects are sensitive for you.

P.S. My laptop, which served me well for 5 years, just gave out. With grad school, the recent loss of my stepdad, and ongoing medical bills, finances are tight. I’m currently managing writing commissions and my dissertation from my phone, which is okay but really challenging. If you can help with a donation or by commissioning some of my writing, it would mean the world to me. Just send me a message 💜 Thank you from the bottom of my heart for any support you can offer. 💜🙏🏻

Read this on AO3 | Check out my Masterlist

Dieter Bravo never thought he’d end up married, let alone to his best friend. It wasn’t the kind of love story he had planned for himself, but then again, Dieter’s plans were usually an afterthought to his impulsive nature. He met her—his wife, the love of his life—years ago at a book signing. He’d been dragged there by a friend who swore her mystery novels were like something straight out of an Agatha Christie thriller, but with a modern, edgier twist.

“Come on, man. Just try something new,” his friend had nudged, practically shoving Dieter into the crowded bookstore. “She’s hot and her books are actually good. Not that you’d know.”

Dieter rolled his eyes but followed, pretending not to care. He didn’t read much beyond scripts, but when he saw her—standing there all wide-eyed and charming behind the signing table, chatting easily with fans—he was hooked. She had this warmth about her, a smile that reached her eyes, and a way of making everyone feel like they were the only person in the room.

When it was his turn in line, Dieter cleared his throat, a little unsure of what to say. “So, uh, is it true you based your killer on your ex?” he asked, flashing her his signature smirk.

She looked up, amused. “Only the charming parts. The murderous tendencies are purely fictional.”

Dieter chuckled, genuinely entertained. “Good to know. I’ll keep my charming side in check.”

She laughed, and Dieter swore he could listen to that sound all day. But the moment passed quickly, and they parted ways, the brief exchange lingering in Dieter’s mind longer than he’d like to admit.

They didn’t reconnect until months later when Dieter landed the role of a lifetime in the film adaptation of one of her books. He played the brooding lead, a role he was born to play, and she was on set every day, consulting on the story she knew better than anyone.

“Bravo!” she called out one afternoon, waving the script in the air as he finished a scene. “I think you missed a line, but you definitely nailed the smirk.”

“Missed the line? Nah, I made it better,” Dieter shot back, strutting over with that effortless confidence of his. “Besides, isn’t the lead supposed to be mysterious and broody? I’m just adding layers.”

She rolled her eyes, smiling. “Layers of bullshit, maybe.”

Their banter was easy, and soon, late nights spent in hotel bars became their thing. They’d laugh over terrible room service and even worse dialogue changes, often rewriting entire scenes together between drinks.

“Do you think the audience is gonna buy this twist?” Dieter asked one night, his brow furrowed as he scribbled on a napkin. “It’s a bit much, don’t you think?”

“It’s a mystery, Bravo. It’s supposed to be dramatic,” she said, playfully nudging his shoulder. “Besides, you’re the one bringing it to life. If anyone can sell it, it’s you.”

Over the years, their friendship grew deeper. Dieter adored her—not just for her talent, but for the way she saw right through him. She didn’t care about the Hollywood persona; she cared about the guy who struggled with his lines, laughed too loudly, and occasionally got lost in his own head. And it was clear to anyone who knew him that she was the only one who truly got him.

“Why do you even stick around?” Dieter asked one night, half-drunk and more vulnerable than he intended. They were sitting on the balcony of some hotel in Vancouver, the city lights flickering below them, empty glasses scattered between them.

She looked over at him, surprised at the question but not at the insecurity behind it. “You’re kidding, right? Who else is gonna put up with my obsessive rewriting of everything?”

Dieter smirked, but the self-deprecation was still there, hovering. “I’m serious, baby. You’ve seen me at my worst. Hell, you’ve probably seen me at my best, and let’s be real, there’s not a whole lot of difference.”

She rolled her eyes, but there was affection in the gesture. “Come on, Dee. You think I don’t know who you are? I’ve watched you screw up a million times and still pull it off somehow. You’re not as hopeless as you think.”

“Yeah, but it’s all smoke and mirrors,” he muttered, leaning back and staring at the city. “I’m just this mess pretending to be a movie star. And people buy it, but I don’t know how much longer I can keep up the act.”

She leaned closer, her smile gentle but knowing. “You’re not acting, Dee. This is you—chaotic, brilliant, all over the place. And somehow it works. That’s why people love you. It’s why I love you.”

He chuckled, shaking his head. “Sure, but it’s not exactly the stuff that makes for a stable life. I can’t even commit to a weekly gym routine, let alone… you know, anything permanent.”

“Well, it’s good you know that about yourself,” she said, her tone more serious now. “But just because you’re not ready for all that doesn’t mean you’re a failure. You’ve built this crazy, messy, amazing life, and you’ve done it on your terms.”

Dieter glanced at her, the sincerity in her eyes almost too much to bear. “But it’s still just a mess, right? Like, I don’t know how to be the guy who settles down, who has the white picket fence and the kids. It’s not in me.”

“Yeah, but that doesn’t make you any less,” she pointed out, nudging his knee with hers. “You’re the guy who shows up when it counts, who makes people laugh when they need it, who cares more than he lets on. And that’s enough, Dee. It really is.”

Dieter stared at her, his expression softening. “You make it sound like I’m not totally screwing everything up.”

“Because you’re not,” she said simply, giving him a small, reassuring smile. “You’re doing what works for you, and that’s more than most people can say. So don’t be so hard on yourself, okay?”

They sat in a comfortable silence, the kind that comes from knowing each other inside and out. Dieter wasn’t sure if he could ever really change, but with her by his side, he felt like maybe he didn’t need to.

The media loved to ask when Dieter Bravo, Hollywood’s lovable mess, was going to settle down. He always laughed it off, brushing it aside with jokes and his trademark self-deprecation. “Settle down?” he’d scoff to reporters, flashing that crooked grin. “Have kids? I can barely take care of myself. I mean, who’s gonna look after the baby when I’m off in Cabo or Amsterdam on a bender?”

He was always open about not wanting to be tied down, convinced that marriage and fatherhood were responsibilities he’d inevitably screw up just like everything else. Deep down, he didn’t think he was cut out for it. Not the commitment, not the kids—none of it. And yet, every time he thought about those nights spent talking with her, he couldn’t help but wonder if maybe, just maybe, he could be more than the sum of his fears.

The truth was, Dieter loved being around kids, especially when visiting his favorite charities—arts programs, hospitals, anywhere that needed his presence to brighten the day. He had a soft spot for the kids who showed up at his movie premieres with homemade signs and for the shy ones who peeked out from behind their parents at hospital visits, their eyes lighting up at the sight of a real-life movie star. He’d spend hours signing autographs, posing for pictures, and handing out gifts. But wanting that momentary joy and having it every day were two entirely different things, and he didn’t think he was built for the kind of life that meant forever.

Then there was Vegas. It was one of those wild weekends that only Dieter and his friends could pull off, the kind that started with a simple plan and spiraled into chaos before anyone could catch their breath. They were there to celebrate a friend’s birthday—a milestone that felt more like a warning than a celebration to Dieter, who had spent the better part of the year dodging questions about settling down and growing up.

The night was a blur of neon lights, overpriced drinks, and the kind of reckless energy that only Vegas could inspire. Dieter and his best friend were deep into their third round of shots at some tacky but charming casino bar, laughing so hard their sides hurt. The conversation was easy, like it always was, jumping from half-remembered movie quotes to bad relationship stories that only got funnier with every shot.

“Remember when you two were drunk off margaritas and swore you’d get married if you were still single at 35?” one of their friends blurted out, pointing at Dieter and her with a tipsy grin. “Well, look at that—clock’s ticking, you two.”

“Oh please, they’d kill each other in a week,” another friend chimed in, rolling their eyes dramatically. “But hey, at least the headlines would be great.”

Dieter leaned back, smirking. “You think she’d kill me? I’m charming as hell.”

She snorted, leaning in closer to Dieter. “Charming? Sure, Dee, if charming means spilling three drinks and forgetting your lines.”

“Oh, you love it, don’t lie,” Dieter shot back, nudging her shoulder playfully.

Their friends egged them on, throwing out half-baked marriage advice between sips of whatever was in their glasses. “Just make sure you don’t pull a Ross and say the wrong name at the altar,” one joked, and they all burst into laughter, doubling over as the drinks kept flowing.

“Hey, I can pronounce her name just fine,” Dieter retorted, raising his glass to her. “What do you say, baby? You and me, Vegas style.”

“Wel…we’re way past 35 now…” she said, still smiling but now with a hint of mischief, “technically, we missed our window… so might as well make good on that old pact, right?”

Dieter stared at her, the room spinning slightly as he tried to read between the lines. They were supposed to be just friends, right? But it didn’t feel like a joke anymore, not when she looked at him like that. And for once, he didn’t want to think it through. He didn’t want to second-guess it or talk himself out of it like he usually did.

“Fuck it,” Dieter said, grinning wider than he had in months. “Let’s do it. You and me, baby. Let’s get hitched.”

Their friends erupted in cheers, half-shocked, half-encouraging, but it didn’t matter. They were drunk on cheap tequila and the reckless abandon of the Vegas Strip, where anything seemed possible. Before Dieter knew it, they were stumbling into a tacky little chapel off the main drag, the kind with neon hearts and an Elvis impersonator in the back who’d seen one too many late-night weddings.

The ceremony was a blur. Dieter remembered laughing so hard that he nearly dropped the ring—some gaudy, oversized thing they’d bought from a souvenir shop on the way over—and the way she squeezed his hand so tightly he could feel her nerves mixing with his own. There were no big speeches or dramatic declarations of love, just a lot of giggling, whispered jokes, and the kind of easy joy that felt like it belonged to them and them alone.

“Do you, Dieter Bravo, take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife?” the Elvis officiant drawled, barely keeping it together.

Dieter glanced at her, still half-expecting her to back out at the last second. But she was looking at him, eyes full of that familiar mix of sarcasm and something deeper that he’d never quite put a name to. “I do,” he said, and for once, it didn’t feel like a lie.

“And do you, sweetheart, take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband?” Elvis asked, already cracking a grin.

She squeezed Dieter’s hand, barely containing her laughter. “Hell yeah, I do.”

Elvis squinted, pausing dramatically. “Are you sure? Divorces are expensive. Trust me, I’ve had three.”

Their friends howled from the pews, tossing out quips. “Yeah, blink twice if you need an escape plan!” one of them shouted, while another chimed in, “You’re stuck with him now, good luck!”

Dieter threw his arm around her, laughing so hard his sides hurt. “Don’t worry, baby, I’m the best terrible decision you’ll ever make.”

She leaned in, grinning. “Guess we’re both screwed then.”

They kissed, and it was messy and off-center, but it felt right. It was the kind of kiss that was more about the laughter and less about the perfection of the moment, which was exactly how Dieter liked it. When they pulled apart, he was breathless, and she was glowing in a way that made the whole crazy, impulsive thing feel like the best decision he’d ever made.

They walked out of that chapel with matching rings and a new reality that neither of them fully understood but were more than willing to figure out together. And in true Dieter fashion, they celebrated the only way they knew how—by grabbing greasy burgers at an all-night diner and gambling away the rest of the night like newlyweds who couldn’t care less about what tomorrow would bring.

For once in his life, Dieter didn’t feel like he was running from anything. He was running toward something—toward her—and it felt like the only thing that made sense.

–

The first few months of marriage were an unpredictable whirlwind, much like the wedding itself. There were no grand changes, no dramatic shifts—just more of the same easy companionship they’d always had, now with the added humor of “Mrs. Bravo” peppered into their banter. They spent mornings in Dieter’s cluttered kitchen, arguing over the best way to make coffee while stumbling over each other in pajamas that never quite matched. Evenings were spent curled up on the couch, watching bad movies and stealing kisses during the credits like lovesick teenagers.

Their friends couldn’t get enough of it, either. The tabloids had gone wild over the news—Dieter Bravo, Hollywood’s most notorious bachelor, suddenly married to his long-time friend in a drunken Vegas escapade. Headlines like “Bravo’s Big Gamble” and “Hollywood’s Wildest Newlyweds” splashed across every gossip rag in the country. But Dieter and his wife took it in stride, shrugging off the noise and focusing on what actually mattered: them.

His family had been just as surprised but in the best way. They had welcomed her with open arms from the very first time she and Dieter had visited together. His mom had pulled her into a tight hug at the door, immediately peppering her with questions about her books and telling her how she had a shelf dedicated to them in the living room. Dieter’s siblings loved her, too—his sister often roping her into baking sessions in the kitchen, laughing over old stories about Dieter’s childhood antics that usually ended with him covered in mud or glitter or some combination of both.

It wasn’t long before she became a staple in their family gatherings, fitting in as if she’d always been there. Sunday dinners at the Bravo house turned into her favorite ritual. She’d help Dieter’s mom in the kitchen, rolling out dough for pies while swapping recipes and stories. Dieter’s nieces and nephews adored her, crowding around to hear tales of mystery and adventure, eyes wide as she brought her characters to life with every word.

“Can you tell us the one about the detective who finds the secret tunnel again?” one of his nephews had asked during Thanksgiving, tugging at her sleeve.

She smiled, glancing at Dieter, who was sitting at the head of the table, grinning like an idiot. “Only if you promise to help me figure out what’s at the end of it,” she teased, ruffling his hair.

His father, a retired fertility expert who had always been the more reserved member of the family, quickly warmed up to her, too. They’d sit on the porch during long afternoons, sipping coffee and talking about life, books, and the occasional scientific trivia that she found endlessly fascinating. He appreciated her wit, her genuine interest in everyone around her, and the way she always seemed to make his son smile.

As the year rolled by, the Bravo family embraced her more and more, and she felt a sense of belonging she hadn’t expected. She was no longer just Dieter’s wife; she was a daughter-in-law, a sister, and an aunt. She was family.

So when Christmas rolled around again, she was eager to be back at the Bravo household, despite feeling under the weather. She’d been sick for nearly two weeks, and Dieter had been worried. She barely ate, surviving mostly on pesto chicken paninis and iced coffee—the only things she could keep down. Still, she was excited to see his family, to bask in the warmth of his mother’s home-cooked meals and his sister-in-law’s desserts. She was looking forward to being surrounded by people who loved her as much as she loved them.

The moment they stepped through the front door, Dieter’s mom engulfed her in a hug, commenting on how thin she looked, and his sister immediately dragged her into the kitchen, insisting on making her favorite cookies. Dieter watched from the doorway, leaning against the frame with a smile. She fit here—so naturally, so effortlessly—that it almost made him forget how odd it all still felt to be someone’s husband. But then she’d look at him across the room, with that same smile she’d had since the bar in Vegas, and it felt right.

But as they settled into the cozy familiarity of his childhood home, Dieter’s father began to notice something. It wasn’t just that she looked tired—there was something else. A subtle glow to her skin, the way her eyes would soften when she looked at Dieter, the quiet but unmistakable aversions to certain foods she normally loved. When she grimaced at the sight of his wife’s famous lasagna and instead picked at a simple salad, he raised an eyebrow. He had seen it before, four times with his own wife, and the theory formed in his mind almost instantly.

It was the little things: how she leaned into Dieter when she thought no one was looking, resting her head on his shoulder like she couldn’t quite keep herself upright; the way her laughter was softer, tinged with something almost nervous. She hadn’t touched a drop of wine the entire evening, claiming she wasn’t in the mood, which was unlike her—especially when Dieter’s mom brought out her favorite bottle from the cellar.

Dieter’s dad observed quietly, piecing together the signs with a mix of curiosity and growing certainty. He knew better than to jump to conclusions, but every instinct told him that there was more to her recent sickness than a simple bug.

–

Later that evening, after dinner, Dieter and his father found themselves outside on the patio. The chill in the air was biting, and Dieter’s breath formed little puffs of smoke as he lit a cigarette, the faint glow of the ember flickering in the dark. He offered one to his dad, who simply shook his head, declining as usual. They settled into an easy silence, the kind that came from years of shared moments like these, watching the yard stretch out before them, dotted with twinkling Christmas lights that cast a warm, festive glow over the familiar landscape.

Dieter took a long drag, savoring the brief buzz of nicotine, and leaned back in his chair. It was quiet, the kind of quiet that always made him think too much, but tonight he welcomed it. He glanced sideways at his dad, whose face was half-lit by the soft glow of the porch light, lost in thought as he nursed his coffee.

“You know, son,” his father said finally, breaking the silence, “I couldn’t help but notice something about her tonight.”

Dieter raised an eyebrow, curiosity piqued. “Yeah? Like what?”

His father hesitated, his expression thoughtful as he swirled the coffee in his mug. “She’s been feeling under the weather, hasn’t she? Seems a bit off.”

Dieter nodded, taking another drag and blowing out the smoke in a slow stream. “Yeah, she’s been sick for a couple of weeks. Picky about food, which isn’t like her. She’s basically living on those pesto chicken paninis. She can’t keep much else down.”

His father chuckled softly, the sound low and knowing, like he was recalling something long ago. “Huh. That’s interesting. Reminds me of your mom back in the day.”

Dieter frowned, glancing over at him. “What do you mean?”

There was a pause, and his father’s eyes stayed fixed on the yard, lost in a memory that Dieter couldn’t quite place. Finally, he spoke, his tone careful, almost gentle. “Have you considered she might be pregnant?”

Dieter’s reaction was instant—he snorted, nearly choking on his cigarette smoke as he laughed it off, but the sound was more nervous than amused. “Pregnant? Nah, no way. She’s got an IUD. Besides, we’ve been careful.”

His father smiled, but it wasn’t condescending. It was the kind of smile that spoke of experience, of having lived through more than one surprise in his lifetime. “IUDs aren’t foolproof, son. Nothing is. And I’ve seen those signs before. Aversions, fatigue, the way she looked at food tonight… I saw it with your mother every time she was pregnant.”

Dieter’s laugh faded, replaced by an uncomfortable tightness in his chest. He ran a hand through his hair, tugging slightly at the ends as his mind raced. “You’re serious?”

“Look, I’m not saying she is,” his father said, raising his hands in a small gesture of surrender. “But I’ve been around this long enough to know the signs when I see them. I’m just saying, it’s possible.”

Dieter stared out at the yard, the once comforting sight now blurred by the thoughts colliding in his mind. He tried to dismiss it, to chalk it up to his dad’s habit of overanalyzing things. But suddenly, every little moment from the past few weeks replayed in his head like a reel he couldn’t pause: the way she’d cried over soup earlier that evening, overwhelmed by finally finding something she could eat; the quiet, tired smiles; the sudden need to rest her head on his shoulder whenever she got the chance. Dieter had brushed it off as just a rough patch—nothing serious, nothing that couldn’t be fixed with rest and time.

But now, hearing his father say it out loud, it all started to click. The missed meals, the strange cravings, her emotional reactions to things that normally wouldn’t faze her. It was like putting together a puzzle he didn’t even know he was working on.

“What do I do if you’re right?” Dieter finally asked, his voice low, tinged with a mix of fear and something else he couldn’t quite name.

His father took another sip of his coffee, considering his son carefully. “You talk to her. Find out for sure. And whatever the outcome, you handle it together. That’s what this is, Dieter. Marriage, family—it's not about knowing every answer. It’s about facing it together, no matter how unexpected it is.”

Dieter nodded, though his mind was still reeling. He didn’t know if he was ready for what his father was suggesting, but one thing was clear: he needed to talk to her. His dad’s words hung heavy in the cold night air, and suddenly, the easygoing world Dieter had grown comfortable in felt a little less certain. 

–

That night, back in their room at Dieter’s parents’ house, the tension lingered like a thick fog. They were staying for the weekend, and though the familiarity of the guest room usually felt comforting, tonight it felt like the walls were closing in. Dieter sprawled out on the bed, flipping through channels on the TV without really watching. His mind was a mess of half-formed thoughts, circling back to the conversation with his father, and he couldn’t shake the uneasy feeling gnawing at him.

She was curled up next to him, absorbed in her Kindle, but every so often, Dieter noticed her shifting slightly, like she couldn’t quite get comfortable. He glanced at her from the corner of his eye, trying to figure out how to bring up what was weighing on him without sounding like he’d lost his mind.

“So, funny story,” Dieter started, forcing a lightness into his tone that he didn’t feel. “My dad has this theory. He thinks you might be pregnant.”

She looked up from her Kindle, her brow furrowing as she processed his words. “What? Where’d that come from?”

“Yeah, I know,” Dieter laughed, though it sounded more nervous than amused. He fidgeted with the remote, clicking through channels too fast to see what was on. “He’s been watching you tonight, noticing stuff. You know, the food aversions and all that. He said something about it reminding him of when my mom was pregnant.”

She blinked, staring at him like she wasn’t sure if he was joking or serious. “That’s… random. I mean, it’s just paninis and iced coffee. And I’ve been stressed, that’s all. I mean, I have an IUD.”

“Yeah, that’s what I told him,” Dieter said, shrugging. “I told him it’s not possible, right? But he kept going on about how those things aren’t foolproof and—”

She cut him off, her laugh sharp and a little shaky. “No, yeah, of course. It’s just… I mean, we’ve been careful. I thought…”

Dieter raised an eyebrow, a playful smirk crossing his lips. “Careful? Are we really?” He gave her a knowing look, recalling their many reckless moments. “I mean, I lost count of the times we said, ‘eh, what’s the worst that could happen?’”

She groaned, burying her face in her hands, but she couldn’t hide the grin peeking through. “Oh God, don’t remind me. You said it’d be fine because ‘science, baby!’”

“Yeah, classic me,” Dieter laughed, feeling the tension break just a little. “Maybe our ‘science’ needs some workshopping.”

They chuckled, genuinely amused by their own recklessness. For a moment, it felt like any other night, just the two of them joking around like they always did. But then the laughter faded, and the unspoken possibility lingered, nudging at the back of their minds.

Dieter hesitated, then set the remote down, his voice dropping to a softer, more vulnerable tone. “IUDs aren’t a hundred percent, you know.”

She didn’t say anything right away, her eyes locked on him as if searching for some reassurance he couldn’t quite give. Finally, she set her Kindle aside, pulling her knees up to her chest. “Do you think… do you think he’s right?”

The question hung in the air, too big to ignore, and neither of them moved. Dieter rubbed the back of his neck, his mind racing. “I don’t know, baby. But we could… find out.”

She nodded, her breath hitching slightly, and they didn’t wait to talk themselves out of it. The drive to the pharmacy was tense and quiet, but the nervous energy turned into something almost comical when they got inside. Dieter, trying to look inconspicuous in his cap and mask, accidentally grabbed a COVID test from the shelf and tossed it in the basket without looking.

She glanced at it, biting back a laugh. “Dee, unless you’re worried I’ve got a pandemic brewing, I think you grabbed the wrong kind of test.”

“What?” He squinted at the box, his eyes widening. “Oh, shit. I just saw ‘test’ and panicked. Could you imagine? ‘Congratulations, you’re… COVID positive!’”

They both snorted, trying to suppress their laughter as they swapped it out for a pile of pregnancy tests. “At least we’re wearing masks,” she quipped, trying to hide her nerves behind the humor.

Dieter nodded, their masks pulling at their grins as they paid quickly and slipped back out into the night. Back in their room, she took the tests into Dieter’s private bathroom, thankful she didn’t have to make the awkward walk down the hallway past his nephews, who were still glued to the PlayStation. Dieter paced the room, his anxiety growing with every passing second. He could hear the faint sounds of her moving in the bathroom—running water, the crinkle of plastic, the sound of her soft sighs—and each noise sent a jolt of unease through him.

He ran his hands through his hair, messing it up even more, his mind racing with a thousand thoughts. What if his dad was right? What if they were really about to become parents? He didn’t know how to do this—any of it. He wasn’t cut out to be a dad. Hell, he could barely take care of himself most days. But then he thought about her, about the way she used to talk about wanting a family, back in the early days of their friendship, years before they got married. She’d share those dreams in the quiet moments when they were lying in bed, late at night, her voice soft and wistful as she painted a picture of a life she wanted someday—one with kids, a messy house full of love, and mornings that started with chaos and ended with bedtime stories.

He hadn’t heard her talk about it in a long time, not since they’d crossed the line from best friends to whatever it was they’d become now. They hadn’t really discussed it after they got married, like the possibility had just been a footnote in their drunken Vegas vows, not something real. But Dieter knew she probably still wanted it, that deep down, those dreams hadn’t gone away, just tucked themselves into a quieter part of her heart.

And now, for the first time, Dieter let himself admit what he’d been denying all along—he wanted it, too. He tried to fight it, tried to tell himself he was still the same guy who didn’t want to be tied down, but the truth was, he’d settled down the moment he said “I do.” And now… he’s sure he’s ready to dream of that life, too. The one where they weren’t just figuring things out as they went but actually working towards something together, as husband and wife, as mom and dad.

Finally, the bathroom door creaked open, and she stepped out, her face pale and her hands trembling slightly. She didn’t have to say anything; Dieter could see the truth in her eyes. Without a word, he followed her into the bathroom, and there they were, lined up on the counter: five pregnancy tests, each one showing two clear lines.

Positive. All of them.

Dieter stared at the tests, his mouth opening and closing as he tried to find something, anything, to say. He could hear her breathing beside him, shallow and uneven, and he knew her heart was pounding just as hard as his. She swallowed, her eyes fixed on the tests as if they might change if she stared long enough.

She finally broke the silence, her voice small but steady. “It’s okay, Dieter. You don’t have to worry about it. I’ll… I’ll take care of it.”

–

Her words snapped Dieter back to reality, his brows furrowing as he tried to grasp what she meant. He watched her walk past him out of the bathroom, her movements brisk and determined, but there was a tremble in her step that made his stomach drop. She went straight to the dresser, grabbing her phone with a familiar sense of purpose. Dieter followed, his confusion mounting as she dialed a number with shaky hands.

“What are you doing?” Dieter asked, his voice edged with growing alarm. “Who are you calling in the middle of the night?”

She glanced at him but didn’t answer directly. “It’s fine, Dee. I’m going to take care of it.”

The line clicked, and a familiar voice filled the silence—one of her friends, an OB-GYN Dieter had met several times at dinner parties and gatherings. “Hey, I’m sorry to call so late,” she said into the phone, her voice tight but controlled. “I need another favor.”

Dieter’s heart sank as he heard the gasp on the other end. The doctor’s voice wavered, filled with concern. “Are you sure? I mean… are you really sure about this?”

Dieter watched her, still trying to catch up, but he could hear the tension in the doctor’s voice and the weight of what was being asked. She glanced at him, her eyes meeting his, and in that moment, Dieter felt like the ground was slipping out from under him. “I’m sure,” she said quietly. “I’ll wait for the prescription in the morning.”

She ended the call and set the phone down, her hand trembling. Dieter felt his shock morphing into a hot, simmering anger, his chest tightening as he tried to make sense of what he’d just heard. “What?” he asked, his voice rising, desperate to believe he’d misheard. “What prescription? Prenatal vitamins?” He was trying to hold onto some hope, clinging to the possibility that this wasn’t what it seemed, that she wasn’t about to make a decision without him. But deep down, he knew.

She sighed, biting her lower lip, her eyes brimming with unshed tears. She opened her mouth to speak, but the words seemed to catch in her throat. Dieter could see her knees wobble, and before he could process it, she was leaning against the side table, her legs barely holding her up. He rushed to her, guiding her gently to the bed and kneeling before her, his anger wavering as he saw the look in her eyes.

Tears streamed down her face, silent and relentless, and Dieter realized it was the first time he’d seen her cry in years. Not since her father had passed, not even when she’d broken up with someone he knew she had loved deeply. She was always so strong, so composed, but now she was trembling, and all she could manage were soft, broken apologies. “I’m sorry,” she whispered, her voice cracking as she repeated it over and over. “I’m so, so sorry.”

Dieter’s anger melted away, replaced by a sharp pain that pierced his chest. He reached up, cupping her face gently, wiping away the tears that continued to fall. “Hey, hey, calm down, okay? Just… baby, please… can you tell me what that was all about?”

She nodded, her breath hitching as she tried to collect herself. The silence between them was tense, heavy with unspoken fears and the weight of what was happening. Finally, she spoke, her voice small and wavering. “I know you don’t want kids, Dieter. I’ve known that from the start, and I respect that. I love you so much, and I know I don’t say it often, but I do. I love the life we have together. And I didn’t… I didn’t want to ruin that.”

Dieter listened, the words sinking in, but every syllable felt like a sting. “You’re not ruining anything, baby,” he said, his voice softer now but still edged with confusion and hurt. “But you didn’t even… I mean, we didn’t even talk about it.”

She looked down, her tears falling faster now. “I was afraid to. You’ve always been so clear, and I didn’t want to make you feel trapped. I know kids were never part of the plan. I didn’t want to put that on you.”

Dieter took a deep breath, his mind still reeling, but he tried to keep his voice steady. “You’re not–Jesus…I understand why you feel this way baby…” he said gently, squeezing her hands. “And I’m sorry we never talked about it before, not even once. I know I said I didn’t want kids, and I thought that was it. But… then…” He sighed deeply… “W-we should at least talk about it before you go and get that prescription in the morning.”

She looked up at him, her eyes wide and glistening with tears, clearly caught between fear and guilt. “Dieter, I—”

“No, listen,” he interrupted softly, his tone calm but firm. “I want you to know that whatever you decide, I’ll support you. I’ll stand by you no matter what. But I need to know that if you go through with this, it’s because you want to, not because you think it’s what I want. I respect you, and I love you. And yeah, maybe I’ve always been afraid of having kids, but I also know you’ve wanted this. I’ve known for years, and I’m sorry we’ve never talked about it since getting married. But maybe… maybe now’s the time we should.”

She shook her head, biting her lip to keep it from trembling. “I don’t want to pop our bubble, Dieter. I’ve spent so long thinking that if I brought this up, it would be too much for you. You’ve said it before—kids are overwhelming, right? And I get it. Hell, the thought of it overwhelms me, too. But it’s different for you. I didn’t want to lose you. I love you so much, Dee. I love what we have. And I was scared that… that if I bring it up, it would drive you away.”

Dieter’s heart ached as he watched her, the weight of her words sinking in. “Baby, I’m not going anywhere,” he said, his voice cracking slightly. “But you can’t just… handle this alone. Not for me.”

She took a shaky breath, the truth finally spilling out in the soft, halting words she’d kept buried. “That’s why I got the IUD. A few months after we got married… after I found out I was pregnant. You were away in London for that shoot, and I was alone. And I—” She paused, choking back a sob as she struggled to get the words out. “I panicked. I was terrified of what it would mean for us, for you, for everything. So, I… I took care of it. I didn’t want to burden you with it, and I thought I was doing the right thing.”

Dieter’s face went pale, his expression shifting from shock to something more profound—hurt, confusion, and an aching sadness that he didn’t quite know how to process. His hold on her hands went slack. He hadn’t been there. He hadn’t known. While he was away, filming scenes and living the life he thought he wanted, she had been here, facing a reality that should have been theirs to share.

“You—” Dieter started, standing up, trying to say something but the words caught in his throat. “You did that… without telling me?”

She nodded, tears streaming down her cheeks. “I didn’t know how to tell you, Dee. You were gone, and I was scared. I didn’t want you to feel trapped or forced into something you never wanted. I thought it was better that way.”

Dieter’s mind raced as he tried to grasp what she was saying. He ran a hand down his face, cupping his mouth as he took in a long drag of air. The anger he’d felt earlier had melted into something more painful, something that cut deeper than he expected. He’d never wanted this, but now, faced with the reality that they’d lost something before it had even begun, Dieter felt a profound sense of grief for what could have been—and for what he still had a chance to fight for.

He swallowed hard, his voice breaking as he spoke. “I wish you’d told me. I wish you hadn’t gone through all that alone. I know I’m not perfect, and I know I’ve said a lot of shit about not wanting kids, but… I want you. And if you want this—if you want us to have this—then I want it, too. But you have to be sure. This isn’t just about me. It’s us, and we can’t keep pretending it’s not.”

She looked at him, her eyes searching his face for any sign of hesitation, but all she saw was the man who had always been there, even when they hadn’t known what the hell they were doing. Dieter knelt before her, his hands steady on her knees, offering her the quiet reassurance she’d been afraid to ask for. They were scared, both of them, but for the first time, it felt like they were scared together.

A heavy silence stretched between them, thick with the weight of everything unsaid. She stared down at her trembling hands, struggling to hold back the tears that threatened to spill over. Finally, she broke the quiet, her voice small and cracking under the strain. “I understand if you want a divorce, Dieter.” Tears began to roll down her cheeks again, and she looked up at him, and he could feel and see the pain and resignation in them. “I’d give it to you, you know. If that’s what it takes for you to live your truth. If it means you get to live the life you always wanted—not something complicated by a kid and a wife.”

Dieter’s breath caught in his throat, and he shook his head, trying to grasp the gravity of what she was saying. “What? No… what are you talking about? Divorce? That’s not—”

“I don’t want to trap you, Dee,” she interrupted, her voice quivering. “I never wanted you to feel stuck. At least if we divorce, I get to keep my baby, and you get to live your life. We both get what we want.” She said it with a heartbreaking kind of finality, her gaze dropping as though she couldn’t bear to look at him.

Hearing her say “her baby” like that shattered something inside Dieter. He could feel his chest tighten as his emotions boiled over, hot tears streaming down his face. “You think that’s what I want?” he whispered, his voice breaking as he tried to keep it down. They were still in his parents’ house, and he didn’t want anyone hearing this, but he couldn’t keep the hurt out of his words. “You think I want to live some half-assed life without you? Without… our baby?”

She flinched at his words, torn between the guilt and the love she still felt for him. “Dieter, you’ve always said—”

“I know what I’ve said!” Dieter snapped, his voice rising before he caught himself. He pressed a fist to his mouth, trying to stifle the sobs that threatened to break free. “God, I’ve been so fucked up. So caught up in what I thought I wanted, what I told everyone I didn’t want. I never… I never told you how much I love you. How much I need you. And now you’re willing to sacrifice everything because of me? Because I’m too much of a mess to communicate? That’s not fair, baby. That’s on me.”

She looked away, blinking back tears as she tried to keep her voice steady. “It’s not about blame, Dieter. I can’t live with the guilt of not giving you the chance to have the life you deserve. I’d rather… I’d rather set you free than see you stuck in something you don’t want. I love you too much for that.”

Dieter shook his head, his shoulders slumping as the enormity of her words hit him. He didn’t know how to make her understand. “But I don’t want to be free,” he said, almost pleading. “I don’t want any of this without you. I’ve spent my whole life running from everything—commitment, responsibility, you name it. But not you. Not us. You… you made me realize I could be more than that.”

She listened, her heart breaking with every word. “I don’t want to be unfair, Dee. I’ve spent so long dreaming about this—about being a mom. And I know kids were never part of your dream, and I just… I don’t want to take that from you.”

Dieter wiped his eyes, his voice hoarse and desperate. “You’re not taking anything from me. Please, don’t do this. Don’t make decisions for me. You’ve always been my partner, my equal… baby, you make me want to be a better person… whatever the hell that looks like…”

She let out a shaky laugh through her tears, reaching up to cup his face. “I just… I didn’t want to pop our bubble. It’s been so perfect, even with all the chaos. And the thought of losing that, of losing you in such a way… it scares me more than anything.”

Dieter’s sobs turned to quiet laughter, a broken sound that mirrored the bittersweetness of the moment. “You think I’m not scared? I’ve been scared of fucking everything my whole life, and you were the one person who made me think I didn’t have to be. You’re my team, baby. We’re a damn good one. And I know that if we have this kid… our kid… we’d be amazing parents, too.”

She looked at him, her tears finally slowing, replaced by a fragile smile that made Dieter’s heartache. “I just don’t want to be unfair,” she whispered, her voice soft but sincere.

“You’re not being unfair,” Dieter said, his tone tender but firm. “Please, just… reconsider. Our relationship, our marriage… our baby. Let’s figure it out together. No more guessing what the other person wants.”

She nodded, her eyes locking with his, and for the first time since the night had started, she felt a glimmer of hope. They were both terrified, still reeling from everything that had come to light, but at least now, they were facing it together, no more secrets, no more hiding. Just the two of them and the uncertain but hopeful future with a baby they were ready to build.

–

The next morning was Christmas, and despite the whirlwind of emotions that had unfolded the night before, Dieter and his wife had decided to keep their news to themselves for now. It was too early—too new, too precious, and far too complicated to try to explain just yet. They put on their best smiles, exchanged gifts with his family, and managed to get through the morning without giving anything away.

As soon as they left his parents’ house, they headed straight to her OB-GYN’s office. Dieter squeezed her hand in the waiting room, both of them tense but trying to stay calm. When the doctor finally confirmed the news—they were eight weeks along—it felt both real and surreal at the same time. They were both relieved and overwhelmed, knowing it was still too early to tell anyone, too early for announcements, but their hearts were already full of the possibility.

Back at their house, Dieter immediately started making little changes, moving things around and insisting on turning one of the guest rooms into a nursery. “This room gets the best light,” he said, gesturing animatedly as they stood in the empty space, still filled with random furniture and boxes they hadn’t sorted through. “We can do a crib over here, maybe a rocking chair by the window… Oh, and I saw this thing on Pinterest—don’t laugh—about these little wall decals, like stars and moons. We could do a whole sky theme.”

She watched him, leaning against the doorframe, a soft smile tugging at her lips. “I didn’t even know you had a Pinterest account.”

Dieter turned, shrugging sheepishly. “What? I like my aesthetics.”

She laughed, her heart swelling at the sight of him so invested. It was like watching a kid with a new project, and she couldn’t help but feel a little lighter. “You’re really into this, huh?”

He looked at her, eyes sparkling with an excitement that was infectious. “Yeah, I am. What’s so funny?”

She shook her head, still smiling. “Nothing, it’s just… I never thought I’d see the day when Dieter Bravo is this excited about becoming a dad.”

Dieter’s expression softened, and he crossed the room, wrapping his arms around her. “Well, get used to it, baby. I’m all in.”

As the days passed, they began to settle into this new phase of their life together, their once spontaneous and free-spirited existence slowly evolving without them even realizing it. They had always been people of the moment, living day to day with little thought of what came next. Before, their conversations rarely drifted beyond the present—they were about last-minute weekend trips, late-night takeout, or whatever wild idea Dieter would come up with next. The future was never really on the table, not in a serious way. They thrived on spontaneity, on the freedom of not being tied down by plans or expectations.

But now, there was a subtle but undeniable shift in the air between them. It wasn’t something they talked about directly, but rather something that quietly settled in, like a warm, comforting blanket. Their conversations began to naturally drift into what was coming, not just what was happening now. They found themselves talking about baby names over breakfast, Dieter suggesting offbeat, quirky names that made her laugh while she countered with more classic choices that she’d always dreamed of, being the writer that she is and her love for literature.

Dieter would randomly pull out his phone to show her baby gear he’d found online, everything from the practical to the absurdly adorable. “Look at this stroller, baby. It’s got all-terrain wheels! Imagine us taking the kid hiking. Okay, maybe not hiking, but, you know… walking down a slightly uneven sidewalk.”

She’d laugh, watching him with a kind of fondness that was new, soft, and overwhelming. She’d catch him in the nursery sometimes, hunched over with a tape measure, making notes and sketches of where things should go. He was planning—actually planning—and it warmed her in a way she couldn’t quite describe.

One afternoon, she found him kneeling on the floor, surrounded by paint samples and wallpaper swatches, muttering to himself about whether to go with the pale blue or the pastel purple. “I don’t know, do you think clouds are too cliché? What if we did something more abstract? Like a sky, but, like, artsy. You know, like, dreamland stuff.”

She leaned against the doorframe, a smile playing at her lips. “Dieter Bravo, debating interior design for a nursery. Who would’ve thought?”

He looked up, his grin boyish and bright. “I know, right? Next, I’ll be on HGTV. ‘Bravo’s Baby Rooms.’ It’ll be a hit.”

She rolled her eyes, but her heart swelled with something deeper. They were still them, still the same pair who’d decided to get married on a whim in Vegas, who’d spent years living in the moment and rarely looking ahead. But now, the future wasn’t something scary or overwhelming. It was something they were building together, brick by brick, conversation by conversation.

Sometimes, in the quiet moments, she would find herself lying awake at night, her hand resting on the small swell of her belly, feeling the gentle flutters of life within her. Dieter would be next to her, snoring softly, and she’d just listen, soaking in the warmth of their home. She realized then how much had changed between them—how they’d gone from two people floating through life, clinging to the present, to a couple that was starting to dream together. 

It wasn’t just about the baby, though that was the catalyst. It was the way their whole world had shifted, gently guiding them toward a future that felt bright and full of possibility.

Their once spontaneous, fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants relationship was evolving into something richer, something that made space for plans and hopes. She’d catch Dieter browsing parenting books or obsessively researching the best baby monitors, and each time, she couldn’t help but feel a surge of love she hadn’t quite known before.

It wasn’t forced or awkward; it was the most natural thing in the world, like breathing. They were still the same Dieter and his wife, the quirky mystery novel writer—impulsive, playful, unorthodox in every way—but now, their lives together carried an undercurrent of something… warmer, softer, and a little more planned than usual. 

One evening, she was curled up on the couch, cozy under a thick, soft blanket, her Kindle in one hand and the other resting gently on the small but noticeable bump of her belly. She’d grown accustomed to the comforting weight of her growing child. Dieter strolled in from the kitchen, carrying a bowl of popcorn, and dropped onto the couch beside her with a contented sigh.

“You look way too comfortable,” she teased, nudging him playfully with her foot, a smile tugging at her lips as she watched him sink into the cushions like he belonged there.

“I am,” Dieter said, settling in beside her and resting his head against her shoulder. He let out a contented sigh, his eyes drifting down to her bump, and his hand found hers, resting warmly over the swell of her belly. “I love this. I love everything about this.”

She chuckled, her fingers absentmindedly tracing soft circles on her belly, feeling the little flutters of movement beneath her skin. “You always loved kids, Dee. I know that. I just… I never thought I’d live to see the day when you’d actually be a dad.”

Dieter’s smile softened, and tears welled in his eyes as he scooted closer, wrapping his arms around her and pressing his face into her chest. She could feel the quiet, vulnerable sobs shaking his shoulders, and it melted her heart. “You’re making my deepest, darkest dreams come true, baby,” he mumbled, his voice muffled by her warmth, words spilling out with raw sincerity.

She laughed, tilting her head back as she ruffled his hair affectionately. “I thought your deepest, darkest dreams that I made come true involved a strap-on, Bravo.”

Dieter snorted, lifting his head just enough to flash her a cheeky grin. Without missing a beat, he buried his face into her chest, playfully motorboating her. She squealed, swatting at his head as they both dissolved into laughter, tangled together on the couch.

“God, you’re such a perv,” she giggled, half-heartedly pushing him away even though she was laughing too hard to mean it.

He finally pulled back, grinning unapologetically as he reached up and cupped one of her breasts, squeezing playfully. “Honk honk,” he said, eyes twinkling with mischief.

She rolled her eyes, shaking her head but unable to keep a straight face. “Dieter, you’re ridiculous.”

“I know,” he said, still chuckling as he leaned in to kiss her softly. 

“I love you, mama.” He whispered against her mouth. 

–

As days turned into weeks, they found themselves back at the doctor’s office for the 20-week scan. The drive there was tense, filled with nervous silence and half-hearted attempts at small talk that did little to mask their growing anxiety. Dieter’s usually easygoing demeanor was replaced with restless energy, and she could feel it radiating off him as they sat in the waiting room, both of them on edge.

She sat nervously beside him, her leg bouncing up and down as she stared at the outdated magazines scattered on the table in front of them. Dieter glanced over, noticing the jittery movement. He nudged her lightly with his elbow, offering a crooked smile. “Babe, you’re bouncing your leg like you’re tweaking. Seriously, I’ve been around a lot of meth heads, and you’re giving me flashbacks.”

She snorted, covering her mouth as a burst of laughter escaped, her nerves momentarily easing. “I can’t help it, okay? This is… I’m freaking out.”

Dieter reached over, his fingers lacing through hers as he squeezed gently. “I get it, but you gotta chill. You’re acting like you’re on something, and trust me, I know that vibe.” He gave her hand another reassuring squeeze. “You’ve gotta stop reading all those Reddit posts. They’re nothing but horror stories.”

She nodded, though she still looked pale, her eyes flicking around the room as if searching for something to distract herself. “I know, I just… I can’t help it. I’ve read too many stories about 20-week scans going wrong. What if something’s wrong, Dieter? I don’t think I can handle it.”

Dieter leaned in closer, brushing a kiss against her temple. “Hey, nothing’s wrong. Our kid’s strong. Just like you. Baby’s gonna be fine, okay? Let’s just breathe.”

They were finally called into the scan room, and the doctor greeted them with a warm smile, chatting casually as she prepared the machine. “How are we feeling today? Ready to see this little one?” she asked, her voice calm and reassuring as she applied the cool gel to her belly. Dieter stood by her side, holding her hand tightly, both of them staring at the monitor with bated breath.

The doctor moved the wand over her stomach, her brows knitting slightly as she searched the screen, waiting for a heartbeat. At first, there was nothing—just static silence, the absence of that familiar, rhythmic thump that they both so desperately wanted to hear. The doctor adjusted the wand, repositioning and angling it slightly, her expression remaining neutral but focused.

Dieter could feel his wife’s grip tighten, her fingers digging into his, and he squeezed back, his own heart pounding. “Is everything okay?” she asked, her voice barely above a whisper, laced with fear.

The doctor glanced at them, her smile reassuring but a little strained. “Sometimes the baby’s in a tricky position so it’s hard to get the heartbeat. Let’s just give it a moment.” She moved the wand again, her eyes flicking between the screen and her belly as she pressed a bit harder, trying to get a better view.

But the silence lingered, and the tension in the room grew thicker. Dieter could feel his pulse racing, his mind going a mile a minute. He tried to keep calm, tried to joke, but his voice came out strained. 

“Kid’s already messing with us, huh? Definitely takes after me.”

It falls flat, and he frowns deeper. 

The doctor’s brows furrowed as she moved the wand slowly, deliberately, the silence stretching on until it was almost unbearable. “Come on, little one,” she murmured under her breath, adjusting the machine again.

She glanced at Dieter and his wife, reading the fear on their faces. “I know it’s nerve-wracking, but try not to panic. This happens sometimes.” The words were meant to soothe, but each passing second felt like an eternity, and Dieter felt like the walls were closing in.

Suddenly, the doctor paused, her eyes widening slightly. “Oh—hold on. I think I forgot to turn on the sound.” She reached over and pressed a button on the machine, and instantly, the room filled with the steady, reassuring thump of their baby’s heartbeat, clear and strong.

Dieter and his wife both let out a collective sigh of relief, laughing shakily as the tension broke. “Oh my god,” she breathed, her head falling back against the table as she squeezed Dieter’s hand. “You just shaved ten years off my life.”

The doctor chuckled, her face apologetic. “I’m so sorry about that. It happens more often than you’d think.” She moved the wand slightly, showing them their baby on the screen. “There we go. Heartbeat is strong, and baby looks perfect.”

Dieter let out a shaky laugh, wiping at his eyes as he glanced at his wife. “Kid’s already got us on edge. I guess that’s just payback for all the years I’ve been a handful.”

They all shared a brief, much-needed laugh, the tension slowly melting away. But the doctor’s expression turned a bit more serious as she continued to move the wand, examining the screen with careful precision. She began marking key areas on the screen, capturing images and making notes as she went. “Now, remember, this is your 20-week scan,” she said, her tone gentle but factual. “This is an important one because it’s when we check for congenital anomalies. We’ll be looking closely at your baby’s organs and development to make sure everything is on track.”

Dieter and his wife nodded, their earlier relief tempered by the weight of what the doctor was saying. This wasn’t just about hearing the heartbeat; it was about seeing if their baby was healthy, if everything was developing the way it should. The room fell quiet again, the soft whir of the machine the only sound as the doctor carefully scanned each part of their baby’s tiny body, capturing and saving images to review.

“We’re looking at the brain and skull,” the doctor explained, pointing to the image on the screen as she took a snapshot. “The structures look well-formed, and everything is measuring normally.” She moved the wand again, pausing over the baby’s chest and marking the image. “And here’s the heart. We’re checking for proper function, looking at the chambers and blood flow. So far, everything looks great.”

Dieter squeezed his wife’s hand, the feeling of both awe and anxiety filling the cavity of his chest. Every tiny movement on the screen felt monumental, every word from the doctor a lifeline. The doctor continued, showing them the spine, the kidneys, the limbs—every detail scrutinized with care and captured for documentation.

“And here’s the stomach and the diaphragm. We’re looking for normal positioning and function,” she said, moving methodically, her voice steady and calm. “All good signs here.” She took another image, marking it on the screen with a series of measurements.

Dieter’s wife squeezed his hand, her eyes locked on the screen, watching their baby’s tiny fingers flex and curl. “Is that… is that the baby’s hand?” she asked, her voice soft, filled with wonder.

“Yes, it is,” the doctor smiled, zooming in on the tiny hand and capturing the image. “Five fingers, all accounted for.”

They watched in silence, their emotions swinging from relief to fear and back again with every scan of the baby’s developing organs. The doctor’s voice was steady, reassuring them as she checked for any signs of congenital anomalies. Each confirmation that everything was normal felt like a small victory, a breath they didn’t realize they were holding.

“Everything looks normal and healthy,” the doctor finally said, pulling back and saving the last image. “Your baby is developing beautifully.”

Dieter and his wife both let out breaths they hadn’t realized they were holding, their hands still clasped tightly together. It wasn’t just relief—it was gratitude, to the doctor and the universe, for keeping their little bun healthy. 

They thanked the doctor, their voices filled with a concoction of relief, exhaustion, and overwhelming joy. As they left the office, they felt lighter, buoyed by the knowledge that their baby was safe and thriving. There’s only one thing for them to do now: start telling their family and friends. 

–

“You okay?” Dieter asked, his voice gentle as they pulled into his parents’ driveway. The house looked warm and welcoming, draped in fairy lights that twinkled against the evening sky, but she couldn’t quite shake the tightness in her chest.

She nodded, but it was automatic, her mind racing with thoughts she hadn’t fully processed, and her tears just started spilling like clockwork. “Yeah, I’m fine. It’s just… it’s a lot, you know? Your parents are going to be so happy, and I—I don’t have that anymore. I don’t have anyone to tell.” She tried to laugh it off, her voice catching slightly, wiping at her eyes with the back of her hand. “God, listen to me. I’m such a mess. It’s probably just hormones.”

Dieter squeezed her hand, his expression softening. He knew how much she missed her dad, how his absence lingered in moments like these. “It’s not just hormones, baby,” he said gently, his thumb brushing over her knuckles. “You’re allowed to feel this. I wish your dad was here, too. I think about it all the time—how proud he’d be, how he’d probably be spoiling you right now.”

She let out a shaky breath, “It’s stupid, but it just hit me today, you know? Like, he was the only family I had, and now… I guess I thought I was past all this. But it’s different now. This is so big, and I feel like I’m missing that piece.”

Dieter pulled her hand up, kissing her knuckles softly. “It’s not stupid. And you’re not without parents completely. My parents love you—hell, they might love you more than they love me. They text you more than they text me, anyway.”

She let out a laugh, and it felt good, a brief moment of lightness breaking through the weight in her chest. “They do, don’t they? They’re always sending me recipes, cute cat and dog vides, and asking for book recommendations. Meanwhile, you get the ‘how’s your liver?’ texts.”

Dieter grinned, happy to see her smile even through tears. “Exactly. Trust me, they’re going to be over the moon about this. You’re their family, too. And yeah, it’s big—it’s bigger than anything we’ve done—but you don’t have to carry that alone. My parents, they’re gonna be here, every annoying, loving step of the way.”

She squeezed his hand, feeling a little more grounded. “Thanks, babe. I needed that.”

Dieter nodded, his own emotions bubbling under the surface. He knew how hard this was for her, and he wanted to make sure she never felt like she was alone in this. “Hey, we’re in this together. And we’re about to make their year, so let’s go in there and give them something to celebrate.”

They stepped out of the car, hand in hand, and walked up to the front door. She adjusted her coat, feeling the weight of the moment settle in her chest, but Dieter squeezed her hand reassuringly. They’d been parked for a while, gathering themselves, and now it was time. Dieter knocked, and within seconds, the door swung open.

Dieter’s mother stood there, her expression a mix of concern and relief. “Oh, there you are! We were starting to get worried—you’ve been sitting out there for ages. I thought maybe something was wrong.”

“Everything’s fine,” Dieter assured her, giving her a quick hug. “We were just… talking.”

His mom nodded, though she kept glancing between them, still a little uncertain. “It’s so good to see you two! Come in, come in.”

Dieter’s father was in the living room, setting out coffee and cookies on the table. He looked up, grinning in his usual dry way. “Hey, you two. What’s this? I thought you’d be busy writing another bestseller or maybe dragging Dieter around to get some culture.”

Dieter laughed, shaking his head. “Well, it’s not that, but it’s something just as good.”

His wife exchanged a quick look with him, her nerves sparking up again. Dieter, sensing her hesitation, gave her an encouraging smile and gently reached up to help her with her coat. As he slipped it off her shoulders, he draped it neatly over the back of the couch, revealing the gentle curve of her growing bump.

His parents’ eyes widened, and for a second, they both just stared, taking it in. Dieter’s mom’s hand flew to her mouth, her eyes brimming with tears. “Oh my gosh… are you…?”

Dieter’s wife nodded, her voice trembling with a mix of nerves and joy. “We’re having a baby. I’m pregnant.”

For a moment, there was only stunned silence, and then his mom let out a joyous cry, rushing forward to hug her. “Oh, sweetheart! This is the most wonderful news! Look at you—how far along are you? I can’t believe it!”

Dieter’s dad, who usually kept his emotions under wraps, pulled Dieter into a hug, his voice thick with pride. “Son, this is incredible. I can’t tell you how happy I am for you. I’m not sure if you remember this, but there was a time when I wasn’t sure you’d ever get your life together, let alone settle down.”

Dieter blinked, caught off guard by his dad’s words. “Thanks, Dad. That means a lot.” He hesitated, swallowing hard before speaking again. “I know I’ve been a mess, but… I’m really excited about this. I want to do it right.”

His father clapped him on the shoulder, his expression warm. “You’ve already done right by me. You’ve grown up, Dieter, more than I ever thought possible. And now you’re going to be a dad. I couldn’t be prouder.”

They all settled into the living room, Dieter’s mom already buzzing with plans. “Okay, so tell me everything! When’s the due date? How are you feeling? Have you thought about names yet? We have to start planning—oh, and the nursery! We’ll need to paint, get a crib—”

Dieter held up his hands, laughing. “Mom, slow down. You’re going to choke yourself on your own saliva with how fast you’re going. One thing at a time.”

She laughed, waving him off but nodding. “Okay, okay. But this is just… it’s all so exciting. I’ve been waiting for this day for so long, and now it’s finally happening.”

Dieter’s wife smiled, feeling the warmth of Dieter’s mom’s excitement wash over her. “Thank you. Really, I’m so glad we get to share this with you. It’s been a lot to take in, but having you both here means the world.”

Dieter’s mom squeezed her hand, her eyes filled with emotion. “You’re not without parents completely, you know that, right? You’ve got us now. We’re going to be right here with you, every crazy, wonderful moment.”

She nodded, fighting back tears. “I’m so grateful for that. You have no idea.”

Dieter’s dad leaned in, his voice quieter but no less heartfelt. “And I mean it, Dieter. I see the way you are with her, how much you’ve grown. You’ve got this, both of you. And I know you’re going to be amazing parents.”

As they continued to talk, laugh, and make plans, one thing stood out among them– they knew there was so much ahead—so many unknowns, so many firsts—but for now, it was enough to just be together and celebrate this beautiful news.

–

After spending a few hours basking in the joy and warmth of Dieter’s parents, they knew the next step was sharing the news with the rest of the world. It felt like another hurdle, one they were both eager and anxious to jump. They drove back home, feeling the weight of their secret beginning to lift. 

Once they were settled on their couch, they knew it was time to tell Dieter’s manager. Dieter pulled out his phone and scrolled through his contacts, glancing over at his wife. “Ready?”

She nodded, though a nervous flutter still twisted in her stomach. “Yeah. Let’s do it.”

Dieter hit the call button, putting it on speaker. His manager picked up on the second ring, his voice chipper and businesslike. “Dieter, my man! What’s up? You ready to talk about the next big project? We’ve got offers coming in like crazy.”

Dieter laughed, exchanging a look with his wife. “Hey, uh, about that… we’ve got something to tell you. It’s kind of a big deal.”

There was a brief pause on the other end, and then his manager’s voice dropped, curious and cautious. “Oh God, are you in trouble again? Do I need to get a lawyer on the line?”

“No, no, nothing like that,” Dieter said quickly, his grin wide. “Actually, it’s the opposite of trouble.”

His wife jumped in, smiling as she spoke. “We’re having a baby.”

The line went quiet for a beat, and then his manager erupted in a cheer. “What? Oh my God! Are you serious? This is amazing! Bravo’s having a baby! You two, this is incredible.”

They laughed, feeling the enthusiasm radiating through the phone. “Yeah, we’re serious,” Dieter said. “We’re excited, and we wanted to let you know before it goes public.”

His manager was still buzzing, the excitement palpable. “You’re going to break the internet with this. But listen, you’ve got to be prepared. This is going to be huge news—your fans, the media, everyone’s going to go nuts. Some good, some bad, you know how it is. But honestly, this is the best news I’ve heard all year.”

They chatted for a few more minutes, exchanging congratulations and discussing the logistics of managing the media frenzy that would inevitably follow. Once they hung up, Dieter turned to her, his eyes bright. “You ready to tell the world?”

She nodded, and together, they crafted a simple but heartfelt post for social media. They chose a candid photo taken that morning, with Dieter’s hand resting protectively over her small bump, both of them smiling with unfiltered joy. The caption read: Our greatest adventure yet. Baby Bravo coming soon.

They hit ‘share,’ and within moments, the post began to explode. Likes, comments, and shares flooded in at a speed that was almost overwhelming. Messages of congratulations poured in from friends, fans, and fellow celebrities. The overwhelming support was heartwarming, and they found themselves caught up in the happiness of it all.

But as the notifications kept coming, there were, of course, some that stung. Dieter scrolled through, his brow furrowing at the inevitable wave of negativity from the corners of his fanbase that couldn’t handle change.

“She’s probably just using him for fame. Classic.”

“Guess Dieter’s fun days are officially over.”

“He doesn’t deserve this. What about all the times he said he didn’t want kids?”

Dieter sighed, shaking his head as he turned off the screen. “I knew there’d be some backlash, but damn. People can be ruthless.”

She took a deep breath, trying to keep her own emotions in check. “I mean, I expected some of it, but it still hurts. I just thought… I don’t know, that people would be happy for us.”

Dieter pulled her into his side, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. “Hey, don’t let them get to you. They don’t know us. They don’t know what we’ve been through to get here. This is our moment, not theirs.”

She nodded, leaning into his comfort. “I know, it’s just… I guess I didn’t expect people to be so… mean. I thought this would be different.”

Dieter kissed her temple, his touch gentle. “Some people will never be happy, babe. But look at all the love we’ve got here.” He pulled up the comments from their closest friends, the ones who knew them beyond the headlines. Messages of support, love, and shared joy filled the screen, reminding them of the people who truly mattered.

“Look at this one,” Dieter said, reading aloud. “‘I always knew you’d be the best parents. Baby Bravo is lucky to have you both.’” He smiled, scrolling down. “And this one—‘I’m so proud of you guys. Can’t wait to meet the little one.’”

She smiled, letting the warmth of those messages push away the sting of the negativity. “I guess we have to focus on that, huh?”

“Exactly,” Dieter said, squeezing her close. “This is our family. Our life. And no one gets to take that away from us.”

They spent the rest of the evening curled up together, ignoring the noise of the outside world and focusing on the love that poured in from those who truly understood. Their phones continued to buzz, and the news spread quickly, but for now, it was just the two of them, dreaming about their future with the baby they were already so deeply in love with.

A few weeks had passed since their announcement, and life had begun to settle into a new kind of normal. 

They were still receiving messages of congratulations, along with the occasional snarky comment, but the love outweighed the negativity by miles. 

Dieter and his wife had embraced this next phase with open hearts, pouring over baby books, setting up the nursery, and spending quiet moments together, dreaming about the future.

One night, as they sat in the nursery—still half-finished, with paint samples and swatches scattered everywhere—Dieter was busy assembling a crib, grumbling softly as he fumbled with the instructions. His wife sat cross-legged on the floor, watching him with a soft smile, one hand resting on her belly.

“Are you sure you don’t want to wait for your dad to help with that?” she teased, noting his intense focus and the stray bolts lying around.

Dieter looked up, smirking. “Nah, I’ve got it. Besides, I’ve got to prove I can put something together that’s not going to collapse on us. I mean, it’s literally a crib. If I can do this, I can do anything.”

She laughed, watching as he finally managed to fit the pieces together, looking far too proud of himself. He stood back, admiring his handiwork before turning to her, his smile broad and genuine. “See? Told you I’d figure it out.”

She patted the spot beside her on the floor, and he sat down, pulling her into his side. They sat there quietly for a moment, both gazing at the crib—the first tangible piece of their new life together.

“Can you believe this is happening?” she murmured, her voice soft with wonder. “Sometimes it still feels like a dream.”

Dieter nodded, his hand drifting to rest over her bump. “Yeah, I know. I’ve been in a lot of weird dreams, but this… this is the best one. And it’s real.”

She leaned her head on his shoulder, feeling the steady thump of his heartbeat against her cheek. “We’re going to be okay, aren’t we?”

He turned to kiss her forehead, his lips lingering for a moment. “We already are, baby. And it’s only going to get better.”

They stayed like that for a while, wrapped up in the promise of what was to come—messy, beautiful, and entirely theirs.

[avelera]

So this is a bit random but:

Dream as the hero in a Greek tragedy and Hob as an Arthurian knight.

Thoughts?

(You obviously don’t have to answer if this is stupid or you don't want to)

If I may riff a bit on this, since I don't exactly have a pre-made answer (it's not a line of inquiry I've really considered), I'd say this:

Dream is absolutely a Greek tragedy protagonist. He thinks of himself that way, he's written that way. A major, indeed central, characteristic of Greek tragic heroes is that their virtues in some situations become their ultimate downfall. No one is dying in a Greek tragedy because they're inherently bad or failed people. It is the essence of that Picard line, "It's possible to do everything right and still lose. That's not failure, that's life."

Dream's dedication to his duty is an incredibly familiar virtue for a Greek tragic figure. It is also the virtue that will lead to his eventual end (in this incarnation). At least, in the comic. We'll see in the show if that's the case, and I have my suspicions based on the story's structure that we'll be seeing some deviation or, at the very least, a more optimistic spin on Dream's end.

Neil certainly wrote Dream to be a figure from a Greek Tragedy too, ironic considering he's also the "deus ex machina" in other situations, being literally a creature of godlike (or superior) power.

As for Hob as an Arthurian figure.... I'm less convinced. And I have a lot of reasons why because I think a lot about Hob's relationship, or lack thereof, with the tropes of knighthood as explored in both canon and fanon.

Let me quickly say that for fanon, sure, absolutely. I've seen incredible, complex, lovely takes on Hob as a Questing Knight or suffering the throes of textbook courtly love (more on that in a second, because I do find that part at least plausible) or otherwise being a gallant and heroic figure.

However, this is fanon. Canon Hob is certainly made more romantic, and I mean much more romantic by the show with the whole missed 1989 meeting and Ferdie's inherent and overwhelming charm. But comic Hob is... hmm, let's say he also has his charm but he's deliberately quite rough, quite crass, more than a bit dim at times, and the furthest thing from protagonist let alone romantic hero material. I think comic Hob would laugh, perhaps a bit wistfully, at the very idea of being an Arthurian figure. Certainly the Hob of "Sunday Mournings" (the Ren Faire comic issue) would be outright derisive of the notion of himself as a romantic figure or a questing knight.

Hob bought his knighthood. I think it's something that bears remembering: he bought it.

(Let me very briefly aside say, as a grubby Yankee myself, I actually find his audacity and sort of "Ha! I got away with it!" humor in that moment incredibly charming. Fuck yeah, stick it to the nobility! Fuck aristocracy, fuck nobility, and fuck aristocratic mythology like Arthuriana that reinforces those power structures. Good for Hob being a peasant who bought his knighthood, something that would be all but unthinkable in the grand sweep of Arthuriana, which for all its romanticism is still pretty definitive about everyone belonging in their social place.)

Anyway, Hob bought his knighthood with money he made getting into early English shipping and with money made from being on the right side of Henry VIII dissolving the monasteries (which were corrupt but were also one of the only forms of social services available to common people at the time, it's an incredibly complex issue) and Hob is as unbothered by the moral quandaries of this as he was the moral quandaries of being a soldier or a bandit. Hob is the furthest thing from being a Galahad. I'm not sure he could even aspire to Lancelot at his lowest on Hob's very best of days. He's just not built like that that we see.

At least, until 1989.

Now, as I've noted elsewhere, Hob's story is fundamentally altered by this ever so minor change in the show of making him still in England in 2022, still presumably waiting for Dream about a block away from the White Horse! Now, this is some courtly love shit right there! My jaw dropped when I began to map out the implications, not just of his waiting but of his becoming a history teacher.

Comic Hob never became a history teacher. Comic Hob seems all but allergic to romanticism and nostalgia. Comic Hob's highest moment of romanticism is wondering what exists in the depths of the ocean and thinking that maybe reincarnation possibly exists.

1989 changes everything. Actually, we even have evidence that in the comic timeline, Hob wasn't even in England by, what, 1992 when Dream passes away? He's in America with Gwen and they've been dating for a bit when she takes him to the Ren Faire, which is the day after Dream died. This implies that Hob doesn't usually stick around England like he does in the show timeline. If that wasn't already clear from the fact that most of his professions throughout the glimpses we see seem to involve maritime trade (sometimes of the very worst sort). The guy is constantly on the move but he stayed in England for Dream for over 30 years.

So there, at least, I think we have the first tendrils of something for fandom to grip onto that Hob does have the potential within him to go on a 30 year quest for his lost love, which is very Arthurian. I think even Hob would be perhaps shocked at himself for this, perhaps alongside becoming a history professor, finally coming to grips perhaps with the history he's seen, learning to care about it, learning that there's more to himself than he thought.

Because Hob is a weird immortal. He doesn't do the things we expect immortals to do, like learn from his mistakes and become some sort of avenging superhero, or even accumulate enough money to not need to have a day job any more, to just utterly detached from normal human life. Instead, he seems to stay grounded in a normal middle class life for whatever era he's in (barring disaster or windfall) and just happen to stick at it longer than anyone else by virtue of his immortality. It's so bizarre in the most fascinating way, it's why I'm obsessed with him, because he stays so grounded in his time period and not in any sort of special superhero way.

But 1989 really brings into sharp relief that there is an element of courtly love to how he interacts with Dream, the Beatrice to his Dante, this figure who inspires him, whom he waits for, whom he changes for (even when Dream himself perhaps doesn't believe himself capable of change?).

There I think there's something to the notion of Hob as, perhaps, a budding figure of courtly love, if not full Arthuriana knighthood.

But more intriguing and, if I may presume, what I think you're perhaps getting at with all of this is: could Hob's Questing Knight perhaps in some way disrupt Dream's Greek Tragic fate?

Well, it's not really possible in either of those genres played straight but, in the original canon, Hob didn't wait 33 years for Dream to come home to him.

So really, in the most optimistic way I'd say, anything is possible.

[misscryptidart]

No but actually make me a WWDITS (union) writer because the relationship and social aspects of humans VS vampires is so fucking interesting.

Like, I know the meme of the Baron choose drama over violence in his confrontation with Guillermo, but the side conversation between the two, "vampire to vampire", immediately reads as a different level of intimacy and familiarity that the baron had not shown to Guillermo prior. The respect between the two, the frankness the Baron gives Guillermo, they are portrayed as equals. Perhaps not friends, but equals.

The relationship between familiar and vampire is also displayed in a new context. Nadja, as soon as she found out that Guillermo was turned, immediately began to correct Guillermo's behavior and teach him what little she could ("You can't treat your master like that. That connection is sacred. If he gets killed, you get killed. You treat him with respect."). Being a familiar is not only serving your master, but building that connection with your eventual sire. Its the time where the master is supposed to be preparing their familiar for the complex and nuanced life of vampirism, easing the transition for not only the new fledging but also the risk the sire is taking. To have another vampire, one who has not groomed and taken care of the familiar, turn them is a clear violation of the expectations of the master role. Nandor, by the social contracts of vampirism, was the one to "train" and "prepare" Guillermo for his introduction to the un-living. Derik took that connection and ruined it. No wonder he was so fucking pissed.

I think it lends itself well to the reality that vampires and humans are not equals. Humans live short lives and have a limited world experience, but they are dangerous and clever. Vampires have the gift of endless possibilities and power unlike any others, but they are reliant on the humans for food and must navigate a world that actively works against their nature. Of course they see humanity as "the others", ones who can't ever possibly understand what it means to be a vampire. Of course they are going to be incredibly cautious when allowing one into their world. The running gag of familiars never actually being turned makes a lot more sense when you put in the perspective that vampires are incredibly protective of themselves and those of their inner circle. It also explains why they are so willing to disregard or kill their familiars. They can't understand what it means to be a vampire. They will die anyways. Who cares?

The Staten Island Vampires stand out so distinctly because they choose to integrate themselves into human society earnestly, eager to explore and learn about their neighbors. Not in a malicious manner, such as a wolf in sheep's clothing, but as a genuine "Hey, I'm here. I want to experience this. I want to be apart of this."

Very rarely in vampire media, in my opinion, does it show the vampires attempting to live their lives interwoven with humanity like WWDITS does. Even Twilight, the most modern adaptation of a vampiric story, has the Cullen's act alien and disinterested in the world around them. But the Staten Island Vampires are involved! Laszlo hangs out with Sean with no intentions of feeding from him, Nandor goes to the gym and movies and actively seeks new friendships, Nadja connects with her roots and visits Little Antipaxos! They are people living in a world of other people, and the world feels so full because of that.

I love monsters and mythology and folklore and terrible little creatures so goddamn much

[aceptical]

Honestly I would love a Splatoon game geared at a 13+ / older audience- or even one still aimed at the same audience that really addresses the topics it brings up.

Splatoon covers darker / more mature topics. Child soldiers shooting each other, invading the land of another species for profit, suppressing another species for over a literal century, how extreme fame affects people, being ostracized / “found out” for being different, being terrified of change, etc. but it never really covers them.

They are there: especially when you look into things like the sunken scrolls or resources outside of the game, but that’s kind of it. And that’s fine!! You don’t have to address them more obviously if you don’t want to. It’s a kids game first and foremost (and even if that isn’t really a great excuse, whatever).

But I would love a game that delves more into these topics, or just getting into these characters heads more. Using outside information and reasoning stuff, we can analyze basically every character well, but we never really see any confirmation in the game for most of it. We know from the relationship chart and the squid sisters stories and whatnot that Callie willingly went to the Octarians, likely due to the pressure of fame and being on her own, but this is never really explored in the game which sucks because there’s so much potential there! Comments on how fame affects people, escapism, and Callie’s, essentially inability, to be alone (since she’s able to step back into the spotlight again once she has Marie with her, both with the squid sisters performances obv but also the news/map announcement thing). And I get that that’s not the story they were trying to tell, but it would be so nice to have a game that delves into this stuff rather than leaving it off to the side where most of the playerbase probably doesn’t know about it.

Splatoon has a really big problem with exploring character’s darker parts of them / adding complexity to characters. Take Callie again: hypnosis cannot make you do anything that you don’t want to do, so hypno Callie’s personality was still Callie, just those darker parts. And that’s just- kind of ignored, past a few one liners (deep cut’s introduction scene.) Then the same exact thing happens with Marina, except we don’t even get to delve into it as much because it is literal brainwashing or mind control or something where she very obviously has her free will taken away. Which sucks!! Because it would have been so interesting to delve into that desperation that comes with wanting things to stay the same, unintentionally hurting the people you’re trying to help / protect, all of that kind of stuff, and then it’s just shrugged off for the rest of the DLC. Which, again, it’s fine that they didn’t want to tell that story: but it’s still missed potential regarding Marina.

This even affects antagonists, too: mainly Octavio. This is kind of remedied by him helping us in Splatoon 3, but it’s never really explored. He does what he does to help his people because they are literally dying from a lack of resources + power. I like the fact that the Splatoon 1 story doesn’t address this, but it could have been really interesting to see- even just a bit of this- in Splatoon 2, especially since it’s the introduction of giving the player that mentality shift from “Inklings good Octolings bad” to “Well, it’s more complicated than that.” This one is explored in the sunken scrolls a bit, but it would be nice to get a little something more regarding Octavio’s motivations (beyond just steal the Zapfish to help his people)

I really hope that, come Splatoon 4, whichever characters it focuses on (since the inkling / octoling conflict is over at this point), it really focuses on: give us more of their flaws, that complexity, and do it in game instead of through easily ignorable twitter posts.

[skywalker1dream]

part of the stuck with the stranger series

Title:Unexpected Connections

part one | part three

note: hello, how are you guys hope you are having a good day or night, my day is fantastic so far I driking my second cup of coffee exams are coming and writing those fics kind of helping me to relive my stress (even tho I have so little time for myself) so this is part 2 of stuck with the stranger and I changed many things cause I didn't liked my previous writing and add plot twist too ( I don't know if it is a good plot twist tho my friend saw it coming mile away, but maybe its because she knows me better then I know myself, okay I won't bore you even more and I hope you like it <3

Summary: Carlos Sainz and the reader's romance takes an unexpected turn when it's revealed she's the little sister of Carlos's best friend, Lando Norris. As secrets unravel, they must navigate the complexities of their relationship. Will love conquer all, or will fate intervene?

warnings: none, I guess?

The first date with Carlos was like stepping into a fairy tale. The soft glow of candlelight illuminated the intimate restaurant as you sat across from him, lost in conversation that flowed effortlessly between you.

"So, tell me something about yourself that I wouldn't learn from twitter," Carlos said, leaning forward with genuine interest.

You chuckled, feeling a warmth spread through you at his easy charm. "Well, I have a secret talent for making the world's best pancakes," you confessed with a grin.

Carlos's eyes lit up with amusement. "Really? I'll have to put your skills to the test sometime. My pancake game could use some serious improvement."

The laughter that followed was infectious, filling the air with a sense of warmth and comfort. As the evening progressed, you found yourselves diving deeper into conversation, exploring topics ranging from your favorite childhood memories to your wildest dreams for the future.

Hours passed in the blink of an eye, and before you knew it, the restaurant was closing around you. Reluctantly, you and Carlos said your goodbyes, promising to meet again soon.

........

On your second date, Carlos surprised you by taking you to a local amusement park. The sound of laughter filled the air as you rode roller coasters and indulged in cotton candy.

"This is amazing," you exclaimed, your heart racing with excitement as you clutched Carlos's hand tightly on the Ferris wheel.

"I'm glad you're enjoying yourself," Carlos replied, a smile playing on his lips as he looked at you fondly. "I've been wanting to take you here since our first date."

As the sun began to set, painting the sky in shades of pink and orange, you leaned against Carlos's shoulder, feeling a sense of contentment wash over you. In that moment, surrounded by the bright lights and joyful laughter of the amusement park, you knew that this was where you were meant to be.

The evening ended with a cozy dinner at a nearby cafe, where you and Carlos shared stories and laughed until your sides hurt. It was a night you would never forget, a perfect blend of excitement and intimacy that left you craving more.

.....

dates followed, each one more memorable than the last. From picnics in the park to late-night stargazing sessions, you and Carlos reveled in each other's company, savoring every moment you spent together.

One evening, Carlos surprised you by taking you to a quaint bookstore nestled in the heart of the city. You spent hours browsing the shelves, exchanging book recommendations and sharing snippets of your favorite passages. It was a simple yet meaningful date, one that allowed you to connect on a deeper level.

As you walked hand in hand through the quiet streets, the night air filled with the soft glow of streetlights, you couldn't help but feel a sense of gratitude for the man beside you. In Carlos, you had found not only a romantic partner but also a kindred spirit, someone who understood you in a way that no one else ever had.

.....

But amidst the blissful haze of new love, there was a looming complication, one that neither of you had anticipated. It all came to a head one week later, on a race weekend, when Lando brought you to the paddock, and Carlos's world collided with yours in an unexpected twist of fate.

As you walked through the bustling paddock beside Lando, Carlos's familiar figure came into view, his brown eyes widening in shock as he caught sight of you.

"What are you doing here?" he asked, his tone laced with confusion as he approached.

Before you could respond, Lando stepped forward, a mischievous grin playing on his lips. "Carlos, meet my little sister," he said, gesturing towards you. "She wanted to see what all the fuss was about."

Carlos froze, his expression shifting from confusion to disbelief in the span of a heartbeat. His gaze darted between you and Lando, realization dawning on him like a bolt of lightning.

"Your sister?" he repeated, his voice barely above a whisper. "But... but I had no idea... that you....."

You watched as the shock registered on Carlos's face, his features contorting with a mix of disbelief and dawning realization. It was as if the ground had shifted beneath his feet, leaving him adrift in a sea of uncertainty.

In that moment, you knew that nothing would ever be the same again. The revelation had shaken Carlos to his core, casting a shadow over the fragile bond you had built together. And as you stood there, caught between past and present, you couldn't help but wonder what the future held in store for you and Carlos.

.....

[tae-rhymeswithslay]

TMNT Hottake: TOTTMNT was disappointing (in my opinion)

i know i know!! i shouldn’t be putting down the new gen of turtles bc thats what every past gen fandom does to every single new iteration BUT this is my blog and i do what i want. Also, thisnis my OPINION feel free to disagree or debate.

SO MUCH wasted potential

GUYS the amount of openings the MM movie left for the series to branch off of was crazy. The Shredder and Cynthia Utrom and her extremely likely connection to the Kraang the were obviously plot points the writers were saving for the second movie and the turtles also couldn’t have drastic character development because of that, but still. The first movie left off on the turtle’s going to high school and regular kids, which was a concept that hadn’t been explored before in the franchise. And the show just. Didn’t. They didn’t go into their school life beyond passing comments about homework and wrestling. We could have gotten a silly shenanigan filled episode of the turtles trying to find after school jobs or clubs or even how they dealt with their newfound fame. That would have been epic.

2. Lack of story content

Really, we only got two complete stories from the series. part one with bishop and then part two with goldfin and even then neither villain really stuck out to me. Bishop had that inciting moment that tied her into the first movie with her mechazoid getting crushed by the superfly mutant. But then her ‘revenge plan’ still felt shoehorned in like they were trying to make a morally complex villain and failed. Her side backstory with her sister just fell flat. i’m sorry, I love sweet sibling bonds, but we just weren’t given enough information or time about Elena for me to personally care about her. Then at the end when bishop turned herself in and then immediately relapsed into villainous territory, I was like “wow, i can’t wait to see her descent into madness as the second half of the series progresses!” but then she was just pushed to the side COMPLETELY in order to start the goldfin plot line. Where Bishop was a fresh take on a classic character, Goldfin and the East River Three were completely new characters created for TOTTMNT. i can kinda see what they were going for by starting off with whats familiar to fans and then branching out into more creative territory, but the shift between stories was so jarring, it felt loke i had just started a whole new series entirely- though, now that i’m typing this out, that also could have been the feeling the writers were going for since part one was told through Leo’s point of view and part two was told through Raph’s. The writers might’ve purposefully made the transition choppy.

3. Personal gripes, aka my fave characters were not there

CASEY!! CASEY MY PRECIOUS LITTLE BOY WHERE WERE YOU?!! Casey was never named as a character in the show, but i will bet my bottom dollar that they were one of the unnamed purple dragons. I have theories that either the boomerang dragon was casey (really really hoping he was. he was my favorite dragon outside of Hun and Angel) or the knife-stick hockey girl was Casey (girl casey truther fr) and i really hope the bucket hat dragon is Keno bc that man NEEEDS to make a comeback. Theres really not much to say about this reason. MONA ALSO WASNT THERE. ik it would’ve been hard to do a space arc in the very limited number of episodes, but it would’ve made my 2012 and 1987 loving heart to see her just make some kind of appearance.

THINGS THE SHOW DID RIGHT!!

guys, i’m not a complete hater believe it or not

no uncomfy crushes/relationships/love triangles

after the Apritello disaster of 2012, i was waiting with bated breath to see how they would handle the Leopril romance introduced in MM and i was pleasantly surprised. It felt so much more genuine and like a realt teen crush. Hes so much more chill about it than Donnie ever was, but he is still clearly very in love and its all so sweet to watch.

2. The ANIMATION

HOLY SHIT WHERE DO I EVEN BEGIN?? it was nothing short of STELLAR- the subtle style changes as the turtles perspectives shifted?? UGHHH!!! i wanted to consume my phone. THE FIGHT WITH GOLDFIN???!! JAW!! ON THE FLOOR!!!

[bird-inacage]

This is finally my review on GMMTV's wildly popular 'Only Friends' which saw out 2023 in style. I do realise this is almost a year since it's release, but I find that time often allows for more objectivity.

Let me start by saying that the buzz and anticipation for this show was immense. The raunchier offering was a departure from GMMTV's typical affair, paired with the understandable hype over a powerhouse of a cast. The excitement reflected an obvious appetite for messier queer relationships to be explored on screen.

I personally had a great time overall with this series, and was highly entertained throughout by the drama. The story isn't airtight, but the plot packs in plenty of twists and turns to keep you on your toes (and I was repeatedly caught off guard). I give kudos to any show that can keep me guessing. The pacing is mostly consistent, with a lot of story packed into 12 episodes. It allows for sufficient character trajectories to be explored and concluded. The final Boeing arc could have made a bigger impact if it had been signposted sooner.

The main couple here are Mew and Top, but both SandRay and BostonNick get a decent distribution of screen time. I've found the general consensus to be that Mew and Top's relationship is the least interesting of the three, and I would agree. You do get very different flavours and conflicts with each couple, as well as complex layers across this entangled web, so there's likely something for everyone.

The lessons learned by our characters is what I feel this show does really competently. We follow them as they royally fuck-up, they fail, learn and grow. The arcs depicted feel very relatable. How can you continue to love someone after they've hurt you? Should you allow your feelings for someone to determine your own self worth? Should you try to change yourself for love? What does it mean to love selflessly, or selfishly? Can friendship and love exist hand-in-hand?

Out of three main couples, two survived. I think Boston and Nick going their separate ways was the only satisfactory ending they could've gotten. Mew choosing to no longer stay friends with Boston was also incredibly valid. When people hurt us, sometimes they can be forgiven, but sometimes they cannot - and that's a valuable lesson in itself.

This is a very strong ensemble cast. The standouts for me are Khaotung and Neo. Khaotung's range is masterful to watch. Neo gave us one of the best villains I've seen in a while. Boston was an absolute joy to hate. What I loved about their performances is you could tell how much fun they were having. I also have to shout out Force, who did a brilliant job of making me utterly loathe Top. But I must stress that it's a real treat to have a cast where everyone pulls their weight.

The series also makes the effort to portray many side dynamics that I hugely appreciated. I thought Ray and Mew's friendship was told beautifully. I adored Nick and Sand's platonic affection for one another. I liked seeing the healthy parental dynamics Sand and Mew have with their respective mothers. Yo's friendship with the younger cast is lovely. The only player I think was glaringly under-utilised is Namcheum. Her character fell really flat in comparison, and didn't add much value to the friendship group. Considering she was one of our few female characters, her presence was rather forgettable.

I'll do a special mention on First and Khaotung, as they are my faves.

Acting Performance: What I commend First and Khaotung on is the ying/yang extremes of Sand and Ray. Sand is a role that requires a lot of restraint. First was told by P'Jojo on a number of occasions that he couldn't cry. To hold in and hold back, and still emote with range and nuance is super challenging. While Ray needs the opposite treatment; to be outwardly explosive across all his emotions. Khaotung put himself through the absolute wringer to bring Ray to life, and it shows. Their fight scene in Episode 10 still gives me goosebumps every time I watch it. (Note: I can't get over how suitably giddy P'Jojo looks when watching them act).

Pairing Rating: [A FIERY ROLLERCOASTER] This pairing is all about peaks and troughs, ups and downs. But ultimately we see two people who truly complement each other and balance one another out.

P'Jojo has a very distinctive voice in terms of direction, which really permeates in every element of the show. He had a clear vision and that intent translates. Stylistically, this was right up my street, and is very palatable for today's audience. From the visually dynamic sets to character styling, there's individuality but also cohesion. The music choices are superb. The opening and end credits were striking.

Editing: This show does some playful things with the way it edits, especially when it comes to montages. The 'interview' shots at the beginning of the series offer us an efficient insight into Mew's POV, but is not utilised again. At times these choices can feel experimental.

Music: Khaotung's OST track 'Let's Try' is a bonafide banger. Khao really is out here to prove his astounding range, as I had no idea this was him when I first heard it.

>>>

FINAL THOUGHTS: This series isn't one I've rewatched from start to finish since it's release - though I have returned to Firstkhao's scenes again and again. Rewatch value is always an interesting factor I like to ponder - especially the why. I think this is one of those shows where it's impact hits most on first watch, but doesn't pack as much punch a second time round. Some people hope there will be a Season 2, but I'm not sure if that would be a good idea, considering our characters have come to a comfortable conclusion in their arcs, and any further disturbance to their stories may feel unwarranted.

(Disclaimer: These are just my own opinions. It goes without saying that one still can enjoy a show for all its successes as well as recognising its shortcomings).

[verosikastrikerstellaexcuser]

Stolas n Stella Anon again, but I just realized something...

Octavia is a plot device isn't she? She's going to be the reason that Blitz n Stolas end up together isn't she? Let's think about that for a moment, Stolas is going to end up all sad again as Via calls him out, cry, cry, cry, hugs and blah, blah.

Swing into S3 and now Blitz feels obligated to help Stolas with his relationship with Octavia and help repair it, because he's a dad too and he sees how much Stolas loves his daughter(...even though he only seems to notice her due to plot writing, we never see them together otherwise in any other scenes). So then this actually has them spending time and actually getting to know one another.

...Starting to think this show has been half n half, in which the first half is a dumpster fire but then the second half is just building from the ground up.

Which might work...if not for the fact that Blitz still is being treated like complete shit by Stolas and doesn't seem to really care about his own feelings(as indicated where he didn't really answer Blitz' question and instead just said "I want SOMEONE to love me!" Which that could mean anyone...not specifically Blitz).

So instead of Stolas' character doing the work, it's going to be Octavia who's going to do it, isn't it?

Did I just predict how the writing is going? If I did I really am going to hate myself..

Yeup... it sucks. Shes not like Fizz and Blitz, shes more like Verosika and Blitz - in that her character exists just to be a thing in the background of her father's story and so her father has drama and is the dad to a teenage goth just like Blitz. Its tiring as hell how frequently female characters end up like this. They're Blitz's adopted daughter, St*las' daughter, Moxxie's wife, Blitz's ex, feels like they're always way more known for how they relate to the male characters, instead of being known as individuals first. Fizz we got to see the life hes made for himself in depth, he gets to be far more than just an ex childhood friend of Blitz's. He's still that, but also more on top. Feels like Blitz was his ex friend as much as he was Blitz's. And he's a side character unlike characters like Millie and Loona!!!! I just want to see deeper into the female characters lives argh 😭

Don't even get me started on how nervous I am to see Stella and Octavia portrayed together if they ever even bother to given how bad the S2 writing is... You just know they'll make it black and white abusive. They'd never dare to show us a loving (even if with unhealthier parts) relationship between Stella and Octavia. That would make things too complex and gray. The fact we get so little female-female character interactions and exploration of female relationships be they romantic or platonic or familial or something else, its all more proof imo that the female characters are treated unfairly. All these daddy issues but no no mother/daughter content. No mother/son either even. Like I really can't get over that they've still not ever actually shown us Stella and Octavia interacting at all, as much as I dread it now we're in S2. Not a single time 17 episodes in (and remember how fast this show goes). And thats all despite the constant St*las-and-St*las'-family focus HB has despite it supposedly being the IMP show. Its ridiculous. I do wonder if part of it is because of Viv changing her mind about this show's plot and what she wants the characters to be, so she just left it, because its less to retcon later. Just can't help but suspect it...

I do agree as well about Ocatvia ending up being the one who needs to "do the work", I really wouldn't be surprised if it goes that way and the plot forces her to "stop being a moody teen" and accept her dad's new relationship. I always thought S1 was great in how the initial cheating was portrayed in a more nuanced and understandable way for every character. Like, upon being propositioned for the book St*las was head over heels after living a life stifled in a relationship he didn't want for his wife's sake. But this sudden cheating threw everything into discord and upset Stella which in turn upset Octavia as her home life became constant chaotic screaming and arguments, repressed resentment boiling to the surface now St*las had broken whatever fake relationship they had. It was great in that you understood why a heavily repressed lonely St*las would cheat, but that still didn't make it okay. He needed to get his life in order and the proper way to do things would have been to break up with Stella first, get that in order, then only when that was sorted to go and find another partner. All while being open and up front about the situation to Octavia as he did so. But obviously this show was originally about people who were flawed but not irredeemable. A better show would have St*las realize this and then explain that hes realized it to Octavia, and would have him being the one to work to make amends. His work in turn would make Octavia forgive and accept him over time.

But yeah, we're no longer in S1, so I really don't think they're gonna pull something like that anymore. Instead, it'll be more bs like Loona lecturing Octavia that her dads still so totally trying so stop being mean to him he can't help needing to act extremely sexually in front of you his daughter omg!!!1111 He was still trying so why are you so mean about him saying Blitz is big dicked in front of you!!!!11 It really fucking annoys me. Octavia hasn't done anything wrong and the idea of them pulling some bullshit to make St*las a victim of her or something, I'm really hoping they don't pull it. But given the downward spiral of woobification of St*las... yeah :(

[indigomono]

today i read i love amy!

나는 에이미를 사랑해 “i love amy” is a gl manhwa i found by chance and immediately loved because one of the mcs is a yandere girl!!! i liked the fact that it tells a story about a yandere, bibi, discovering true love, which she found in her comfortable, uneventful relationship with her first ever friend: amy!

amy is equally a complex character and, due to her backstory, it makes so much sense that she could sincerely like bibi from the start. she always understood that’s just how amy is: self-centered, selfish and unconcerned about other people’s feelings, yet she wishes to see her happy, even when bibi only cares about peter (her crush) and nothing else.

it’s honestly touching to see the development of their relationship and bibi’s feelings throughout the story.

“who wouldn’t want a gift from such a lovely girl?” i liked this quote a lot. it contrasted with how everyone at school seems to think bibi is anything but a lovely girl.

even the side characters are treated with respect and they’re all there for a reason, no useless characters, no useless plot lines. i ended up liking camila and even peter more than expected and i also liked all the side stories exploring other characters aside from bibi and amy.

they all love amy! ♡

the characters are mostly lovable (bibi’s a lovely creep!) and i love their designs, i like how it exactly portrays the characters personality and how simple yet colorful it is. the art style is sooo good and cute and full of personality! i have nothing to complain about this story and i hope to have an official overseas version soon because i really want to purchase it :D

[crooked-wasteland]

Helluva Boss and its Cancerous Structure: Skipping to the "Good Stuff"

Vivienne Madrano has the dreaded affliction of having too many characters, followed by too many ideas. And the logical narrative to link everything together to actually tell a story doesn't seem to be a high priority for her.

For starters, the main plot of the story is supposed to be the relationship between Stolas and Blitz, but every decision that has been made throughout the show has worked to decrease the interest in this plot and relationship. Let's just start at the beginning. The major interest was Blitz being an Imp while Stolas is a prince of the Ars Goetia.

The status discrepancy and how these two individuals came to be in contact was a long-standing source of intrigue that the show seemed very aware of. The first episode (actually the pilot) established a hostile relationship between the two, mainly on Blitz's side, as he was the one who obviously had the weaker position in the deal. If he refuses to sleep with Stolas, he loses the book. He loses the book. He loses his entire business. The pilot also estaished that the business was Blitz's chosen family and thus was an emotional point for his character.

Regardless of the problematic blackmail-ish pretense to the whole thing, it's a good launch pad. It would be interesting watching Stolas fall into true feelings for Blitz, or for Blitz to become aware of his own soft power within the dynamic and how much control he actually has over Stolas through his emotions. However, we never see Stolas fall in love. From LooLoo Land to Ozzie's, the relationship just is changed every time we see it. Even with the suggestions made in the bad trip sequence of Truth Seekers, we never have any actual understanding of how Blitz feels on the relationship. Is he afraid? Trapped? Does he ever realize his own strength in the dynamic? Is he resentful? It never actually settles in what the relationship actually is.

Instead, Madrano does what I think has to be the worst form of storytelling I have ever seen. Rather than watching the characters grow and become more complex, we are sent back in time to justify the relationship by contrivance. Somehow, being friends for a day over two decades prior is all the justification we need. It rewrites the earlier dynamic of Stolas using Blitz because he can to having it be that Blitz was Stolas' childhood crush. That this crush was so strong it persevered through deception, distance, and time for Stolas to immediately beg Blitz to have his way with him at his wedding anniversary party.

The complexity and intrigue on how this relationship was supposed to work was stripped of all depth and relevance. There is no journey for this relationship to take actually because they got along so well that one day, a quarter of a century ago, that their compatibility is all but assured to the viewers. There is nowhere for the relationship to actually go now, making it unnecessary to the plot while also being the primary focus of the plot.

It is a beyond fascinating faux pas that hasn't just derailed the main plot, but appears repeatedly as microcosms of everything wrong with the shows past, present, and future.

The upcoming episode has been rather highly anticipated on Twitter. However, there is an inevitable looming disappointment that hangs over the episode and thus the show at large. As it has yet to be released, this is solely speculation, but I am fairly confident in this assessment due to the trends thus far.

To be frank, this episode exists on the foundation of misunderstanding the narrative purpose of a character, namely Fizzarolli. Madrano suffers from the amateur affliction of over-creation mixed with under-exploration. While not every character needs an explicit purpose outside of expanding the world, a character to closely entwined with your main lead needs a very clear reason to being involved with the plot.

And that's where I feel this episode will crash and burn. There is no purpose to the existence of Fizzarolli. He did not need to exist for Blitz to have an unsuccessful performance career or his resentment to those who have success and fame. It adds nothing to the main character or their life.

Narratively speaking, it would make sense if Fizzarolli existed as a former or slighted love interest to Blitz who then can be used, not as a foil, but as a mirror for Blitz to be forced to contend. Because the point would then be to have Fizzarolli be the living embodiment of all of Blitz's past mistakes that he must reconcile before he and Stolas can be happy and grow their relationship.

Except, as previously mentioned, that is not a factor in the plot. The childhood friends trope between Blitz and Stolas makes this narrative unnecessary. Blitz and Stolas just are, and their conflicts are external threats (Octavia, Stella, Striker), not internal reflections of their worst tendencies. They are not at odds within themselves so much as they just seem to level up and change after every major emotional beat.

Less an MMO where you need to work for that next number through time and dedication to the world and character and more akin to those click bait ads where the most mundane change can completely alter their present self. It's unfulfilled.

Additionally, instead of focusing on the main cast, Madrano insists on reaching above her ability. To treat a minor side character as a main character is an event that is earned by first proving you understand your main characters, which has not been achieved. So, instead of experiencing the same story from the alternative perspective, it feels like a wholly new beginning unrelated to the previous concept. It feels unfinished on a narrative standpoint because the question remains, why is this story important to tell.

That's a very lean way of structuring any story, but lean is worlds better than what we are currently being fed. Bones and fat do not a hearty meal make. Learn to stand before we walk. Madrano hasn't learned quite how to crawl narratively speaking.

In Seeing Stars, the conflict between Stolas and Octavia is identical to Season 1's LooLoo Land. The one way it attempts to make up for the spiritual rerun is by trying to add a parallel secondary plot between Blitz and Loona. However, the problem between Stolas and Octavia is resolved with a simple "Whoops, I forgot" while Blitz and Loona never share a word about their problems. Rather, the episode justifies Loona's abuse of Blitz and misbehavior in general by basically saying "She's had a hard childhood". Showing a brief glimpse into said childhood for Blitz to feel guilty for attempting to set any kind of boundary and claim ownership of being the problem when, in reality he isn't the one in the wrong.

Loona is never given the opportunity to talk about herself either. Instead, she is the preaching mouthpiece for Madrano and Co to talk about how great these characters are without actually seeing any of them do those great things. Loona never speaks on herself and how insecure she feels or how she can't help but need to push Blitz's envelope constantly to feel any kind of security, waiting for him to abandon her like everyone else.

None of this is explored, instead implying that this understanding of the characters should be derived from engaging with their pasts rather than their present selves. We are not encouraged to want our characters to actively change, but to instead "remember the good times." We are not challenged to grow and adapt with age and experience, but instead should be allowed to remain the same and not be responsible for how our actions affect others.

The entire approach to character growth and complexity is antithetical to the mere definition of "Maturity".

[a-court-of-fics-and-errors]

Keep Moving Forwards, Part 49 - Fin

Azriel x Reader Fic

Summary: After finally deciding to leave your abusive and manipulative mate for good, you find unexpected companionship with Azriel, the Shadowsinger of the Night Court. As you navigate the aftermath of your traumatic relationship, you struggle to understand where the mating bond went wrong and contemplate your path forward, vowing never to return to the past.

Find other parts here: Master List

To follow this fic, follow tag "Keep Moving Forwards Fic" or comment to be tagged in future parts.

Content Warning: This story contains depictions of extreme emotional manipulation and abuse, detailed descriptions of direct physical abuse, and scenes of men hunting women with implied sexual assault. Please read at your own risk.

Word Count: 1.2K

Author's Note: This is a multi-part series. Unlike my previous works, this fanfiction delves deeper than just fluff, exploring complex emotional landscapes. As I navigate this new writing journey, I kindly ask for gentle feedback. The topics addressed are profoundly impactful, touching many lives with diverse experiences. Please be gentle with yourselves and others. Healing is a journey, and everyone processes it differently. Be kind to yourself. Take what resonates, and leave what doesn’t.

Please continue reading, being aware of the above content warnings, ensuring you are in a healthy headspace. Give yourself time to process and be gentle with yourself.

Once the decision had been made, everything seemed to speed up at a frantic pace. Rhysand sent word swiftly, his efficient fae couriers relaying your decision to return to the Autumn Court and making arrangements for your move. Packing was simple, as you didn't have much to bring with you - just a few belongings that held sentimental value and reminded you of your past life in Velaris. Instead of focusing on the logistics of moving, you spent the next two days soaking in every moment with Azriel and Nesta, cherishing the time you had left with your loved ones.

Nesta promised to write to you frequently, though she acknowledged that her letters may be screened by the Autumn Court couriers, who were most likely under orders from their High Lord to monitor any correspondence coming in or out. In defiance, Nesta declared her intention to include scandalous descriptions of taboo encounters from her books, relishing the thought of making the snooty old males reading her letters blush. You and Nesta also avoided discussing the fact that you would not be present for the birth of her child, a painful reality that lingered in the back of both your minds. Instead, you reminisced about old memories, now tinged with a bittersweet awareness of an uncertain future.

Azriel spent most of his time by your side, his arms wrapped tightly around you as if he could keep you from being taken away. In whispered promises and hopeful declarations, he spoke of a future where he would come storming into the Autumn Court Manor, fighting through armies to rescue you and bring you back home to Velaris. But there were moments when these dreams felt like nothing more than childish fantasies, and deep down, you knew better than to blindly hope for such a fate.

The morning of your departure arrived all too quickly. Neither you nor Azriel had slept much the night before, choosing instead to spend every precious second in each other's arms. As the sun rose over the mountains, Azriel pressed a gentle kiss to your temple, and you tried to imprint every sensation onto your memory - the softness of his lips, the warmth of his love, the weight of his body against yours. But as soon as he pulled away, a hollow emptiness settled in the pit of your stomach, a physical reminder of the distance that would soon separate you both.

As you met with Nesta, Cassian, Rhysand, Feyre, Nyx, Elain, and Lucien at the gates of the grand city, your family surrounded by gifts and love. Elain had lovingly hand-embroidered the night sky cast high over Velaris on a royal blue scarf for you to keep with you, a reminder that no matter where you traveled, the stars would remain constant above. The fabric was soft like a cloud and glimmered in the light as if touched by magic. She also slipped a few of her famous treats she had baked into a basket for your trip, smacking away Lucien’s hand as he attempted to steal one of the scones. Nesta arrived with a trunk of clothes, declaring that the House had plopped it at her feet right before she left. Inside were lavish dresses and gowns fit for a High Lady with accented notes of the Night Court mixed in with autumnal tones, a perfect fusion of your heritage and new home. Feyre presented you with a small painting, no larger than the size of your palm. It depicted your family at the dinner table, all smiling faces and happiness captured on canvas. Each brushstroke reflected the love and bonds between all of you. As you looked at the faces of these females who had taken you in as though you were their own sister, you saw the resilient spirits that would not allow you to be forgotten easily. Each one was a force to be reckoned with, holding within them a power deeper than anyone could imagine. Cassian enveloped you in a bear hug so tight you worried it might crush your ribs, his strength and warmth engulfing you. Rhysand's embrace was gentler but just as meaningful. He held you there for a few moments, whispering words only meant for your ears. An apology and a promise to work towards returning you to your home.

The last two days had been a blur of bittersweet goodbyes between you and Azriel. Each moment was filled with kisses, tears, and time spent wrapped in each other's arms, trying to hold on to every precious second together. As he held you close, his only words were whispered promises that echoed in your heart, "I will endure each day without you until I can suffer again by your side." His hazel eyes gazed into yours with a fierce determination, promising that this separation would not be the end. And as you reluctantly pulled away, you chose to believe in the unwavering love and hope shining in those eyes.

Lucien had promised to take you to the Autumn Court, acting almost as a guide and diplomat to the odd customs of his home court. As he pressed a kiss into Elain's rosy cheek, she gave him a look that seemed to threaten him: if you weren't taken care of, he shouldn't bother coming home. As you mounted the brown mare, its coat warm and soft beneath your hands, it chortled happily under your weight. With each step outside the city walls, the air grew colder and crisper. You turned your head to see the faces of your family, tears staining their cheeks as they waved goodbye. But Azriel, glorious Azriel, did not wave. He merely smiled, his piercing eyes betraying a burning rage within. A rage that told you he would burn heaven and earth to bring you home. And you believed him. Despite the fear knotting in your stomach and the uncertainty ahead, you refused to let this be your defeat. This journey was your choice, and with a plan that would take months to take place, you were determined to come out victorious. The Autumn Court may be a place of strange customs and danger, but it would not be where your soul would be crushed. You were prepared for whatever lay ahead on this path you had chosen.

As the hour passed and you began your ascent up the steep mountain, you couldn't help but steal glances down at your beloved city below. The familiar buildings and streets that had once been your home now appeared small and distant, causing a deep ache to stir in your heart. But this would not be the last time you laid eyes on your home. The Autumn Court was unleashing a tempestuous storm upon themselves, a storm cloaked in delicate lace and ferocious power. You were determined to show them that even as they might try to break you, you were not the same female that left that cabin so many months ago. You were stronger, more sure of yourself, and you would not let this break you. As you climbed higher, the air grew thinner and colder, but your determination burned brighter. You would keep moving forwards, continue your climb until you saw the other side of the mountain, until you saw home. The glorious shining city of Velaris and the one you could call your own. Your destination lay beyond the Autumn Court, and you would not stop until you reached it.

To my beloved readers who have been with me every step of the way. Your unwavering support and encouragement has given me the courage to push through self-doubt and write about topics that are difficult and challenging. You have left me heartfelt notes that fuel my passion for writing, inspiring me to keep creating and sharing my work with the world. I've dreamed of being a writer since childhood, crafting stories on the family computer and declaring that one day I would share them with others. And now, thanks to your love and support, I have over 600 pages of this fic that I poured my heart into for over a month, honing my skills and finding my voice. I plan to have it printed and bound as a reminder that I can do this, that people enjoy my writing, they want to read it, they want to hear what I have to say. From the depths of my soul, thank you for being there, thank you for reading, thank you for helping me make this dream a reality. This is not the end of our journey together, but for now, it's all I have within me to tell. My beloved character needs time to live her life while I live mine, but we will meet again in the future and she will shine brighter than ever before.

With infinite love,

A Court of Fics and Errors

P.S. This isn't the end of my random little fics, just a break from the long form for a while :)

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