#i love when fashion mags get it right

[waratah-vroom]

Secret Whispers (ln4)

✨ join waratah's (over) 100 follower celebration ✨ Made to order for my love @flowerchild-96

Tagged: landonorris Liked by carmenmmundt, yourfriend and 78,368 others ynhamilton: Alexa, play Reunited by Peaches & Herb

yourfriend: Boy is whipped ↳ landonorris: Happily 🥰

landonorris: pls don't leave me again ↳ ynhamilton: I didn't come to ONE race ↳ landonorris: And I barely survived without you

softboynorris: this is the content I signed up for ↳ ynhamilton: Glad to be of service.

Tagged: roscoelovescoco Liked by lewishamilton, mercedesamgf1 and 63,108 others ynhamilton: Good race this week. Roscoe made some great strategy calls.

lewishamilton: Roscoe made it to your photo dump and I didn't? ↳ ynhamilton: Boy got a promotion he deserved the feature ↳ lewishamilton: Can't argue with that. ↳ landonorris: I took the first photo and I didn't even get a credit ↳ ynhamilton: landonorris You signed up for photography duty when you begged me to date you ↳ landonorris: ynhamilton Baby I'm not complaining that my camera roll is 90% you ↳ lewishamilton: I'm turning off notifications if this is going to continue.

yourfriend: can I just be the first to say daaaaayum 🔥 Liked by ynhamilton

Liked by f1wags, f1driversdaily and 8,274 others f1gossipgirl: Lando Norris and Lewis Hamilton were seen in a heated discussion after yesterdays race. Lando has been dating Lewis's younger sister for the past three years, rumor has it that the Mercedes driver left the conversation with the McLaren driver calling after him.

laaaaando: I need the tea now... Where's Pierre? ↳ charlesisstupid: Or Esteban he has the good goss.

f1driversdaily: It has to have something to do with ynhamilton, right?

dannyric: He cheated on his girlfriend. Some girl on TikTok said she hooked up with him in Miami. ↳ softboynorris: Denial is a river in Egypt

Tagged: yourfriend, yourfriend1, yourfriend2 Liked by landonorris, carmenmmundt and 52,389 others ynhamilton: Tequila with extra lime please

landonorris: How do you look like that? 😍😍😍 Liked by ynhamilton

yourfriend1: Too much dancing. My feet hurt 😭 ↳ yourfriend2: I told you to wear flats! ↳ ynhamilton: But fashion!

laaaando: she's wearing a necklace with an L on it 🥺 ↳ softboynorris: For Lando... I'm not crying ur crying Liked by ynhamilton

Liked by pierregasly, f1wags and 9,362 others f1gossipgirl: Lando Norris and Lewis Hamilton have appeared made up after their alleged argument at the last race. The two drivers were spotted laughing together before qualifying.

laaaando: Pierre what do you know? ↳ charlesisstupid: He must know something.

estiebestie: This drama seems so dumb. ↳ carlando4eva: Nah I bet something happened... Something to do with Lewis's sister/Lando's girlfriend.

ynhamilton and landonorris

Liked by lewishamilton, mclaren and 2,469,284 others ynhamilton: The easiest yes of my entire life. I can't wait to become Mrs. Norris ❤

landonorris: The easiest question I've ever asked. Love you baby ❤ Liked by ynhamilton

lewishamilton: I know I told you two all the sappy stuff in person but congratulations again ❤ ↳ ynhamilton: 🥺 love you big bro ↳ landonorris: Thanks again for your blessing mate

susie_wolff: Congratulations sweetheart! ↳ ynhamilton: Thank you Susie!

charles_leclerc: MATE! How? ↳ landonorris: Not a clue mate. Still pinching myself.

softboynorris: The dots are connecting... ↳ carlando4eva: It all makes sense!

read more of my writing here

ﾟ｡ ⋆ mags' radio: Can I just say how frustratingly difficult it was to find these pictures on pinterest? So disappointing. ⋆｡ ﾟ☁︎｡ ⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡ ⋆

taglist: @fulla02reads @lazybot @rd14 @camillalarke @cool-ultra-nerd @xeliaaaa @azxulaa @hrlzy @ghosttwit @booksobsess @formulakay3 (if you're not highlighted I couldn't tag you. If you'd like to be removed from the tag list please send me a message.)

[blacktacmopsi]

Keegan HeadCanons: NSFW Edition Vol. 2

As I said in volume 1, Keegan likes his porn. If you get really intimate with him and he feels comfortable with you, he might suggest you both watch something together. He'll definitely start jacking off next to you and would like you to give yourself some self love too. He'll ask if he can do it in front of you first though.

He's not big on toys. No fleshlights or any of that stuff. He's a man that does it the old fashioned way- with his bare hands. In his nightstand, he keeps a cum rag that he washes frequently.

But toys on you? He's cool with. He'll definitely lie beside you, fucking your sweet pussy with your favorite dildo while telling you some of the most dirtiest things you've ever heard. "Does that feel good, sweetheart?" "Are you liking how I make your pussy feel, darling?" "I need to get you stretched for when you take my own cock. It will feel way better than this."

Caress his pecs. He loves it.

Keegan has a great dick. He's not scary big (like how we all picture König...poor bby, btw) but he's got some thickness and length so think on the upper end of average. He's cut with a nice pale pink head. Dude has some nice and tight balls too. It doesn't take much to get him leaking precum... and boy does he leak! More of a grower than a shower.

Pubic hair! As mentioned in volume 1, he bounces between manscaping and rocking his natural state. He's never fully bare down there but if he's manscaping, he's trimming the bush back. Nonetheless, there will always be hair down there so get used to it.

Sometimes he doesn't last long in bed and this embarrasses him. This usually happens when he's been away on a long mission and touch starved. If he's getting it on the regular, his stamina is great. He does have a bit of a refractory period though but once it's over, he can go for a round two...or just sleep. It depends.

During that refractory period, expect him to want to just hold you close without saying anything. He just wants to live in the moment and enjoy the silence.

Sizable producer. Keegan's cum skews on the bitter side (because he's a coffee drinker) and is a milky white. But the texture! It will cling to your teeth, tongue, throat...you'll definitely need to wash it down and clear your throat a few times.

If you're having emotional sex with him (which he prefers) he'll bury his head either into the crook of your neck or between your breasts. As he does this, he'll mutter how much he loves you and how good you make him feel. "I want to give you every last drop of me. That's my love for you." He will also hug you while he penetrates you slowly. He'll rub you, taste you, and kiss you all with care.

If you're fucking, Keegan breaks out the dirty talk...and he's going to make sure you absolutely hear it. He doesn't shy away. "Look at you, takin' my whole cock, damn!" "Oh sweetheart, I've thought about taking this pussy of yours for a while now." "You'd look really pretty with my cum in you...and I might add more later."

Not necessarily vanilla but not kinky either. He doesn't really have any fetishes or kinks but will entertain it if you bring something to the bedroom. He just likes sex with the right person.

He does own some porn mags (what a classy guy lol). They're in a box under his bed. They're from his USMC days.

Absolutely doesn't mind kissing you after you swallow. He's not grossed out.

[necromelli]

annie cresta, in all her madness, taught finnick how to love.

finnick was a boy with a puppy crush + no real idea beyond expensive gifts, tacky dates, and old-fashioned advice from mags on how to convey genuine interest. especially when annie comes back from her games wrong. all messed up with her head screwed too loose.

annie was a girl who, even on her worst days, loved fully. her love consumed her whole chest from the very beginning. she was the first to say 'i love you', get finnick sentimental gifts (he still has the first hagstone she found and strung on a rope to protect him on his capitol trips), and truly teach him how to love and not to pretend to love.

annie is the first person who doesn't use finnick for his body. she's the one that taught him how to worship. it keeps her sane, really, when she can unfocus her eyes, turn her brain off, and press kisses into the damaged parts of finnick. all the doting, loving things finnick does didn't start with him, it started with annie.

when she has it in her, which isn't often anymore, she's so doting and affectionate and gentle with finnick it's sickening. i can imagine annie waking up, body and brain on autopilot at whatever ungodly hour finnick comes home from the capitol, and she silently kisses the top of his head and leads him into the bathroom. she turns the water on — hot, because she knows finnick wants to burn the the feeling of their hands away — and let's him decide whether it's a bath or a shower. either way, annie is right there, lathering her shampoo into his hair (it helps finnick calm down when he can smell her), gently rinses it out without stinging his eyes, puts the conditioner in, and washes the touches off his body. annie knows finnick is funny about going to bed with a wet head, and so she'll blow dry it for him.

then, once everything's all done and finnick is taken care of, she'll climb back into their bed, beckon finnick to her, and let him lay against her chest. she doesn't force him to sleep or talk about it as long as he's willing to be with her through it.

and, in the years to come, as annie's episodes start getting worse, start lasting longer, finnick does the same. he'll wash her with his soap, spend the time taking care of her hair, and lays with her in silence. she doesn't have to sleep or talk about it as long as she's willing to be with him through it.

[precious-little-scoundrel]

Note of credit to my babies @stylespresleyhearted & @eliseinmemphis -much and many of these thots originate from their juicy little brains and the chats we have on our unhinged discord, they magnanimously agreed that it was worth sharing with any of y’all who might get a kick out of it.

Main Fic Masterlist

“Biopic”

Sofia makes her Priscilla Film.

But despite this, somehow, Gigi becomes friends with Jacob. So instead of the pitting Austin and Jacob against each other because of Elvis portrayals -and, as Gigi likes to call it “Miss Beaulieu’s Latest” -we get pap pics of Austin, Gigi,

and Jacob out for breakfast/dinner dates. Jacob may entertain petty notions of stealing Gigi from Austin due to Kaia Revenge Syndrome. Gigi assures him she likes him just fine, even if he’s too tall and pinched faced to play her man and much too skinny to really carry any real gravitas. ☺️

she just collects Elvises. it’s what she does.

In fact, older MILF Gigi, who has come out of her long reclusion and is now wreaking havoc on the world with her pretty toy boy actor boyfriend, is now a fiend to Young Hollywood. I mean, this is the woman who Elvis bought Vogue Mag for, just to feature her more often. Now sharing rights with Lovey, she retakes an interest in those editorials and in art and fashion in general. Our world suffers benefits from it. She has a group chat with just about every eligible young man clique, a girls gossip one and a very messy and lurching one of Baron (her son’s) exs.

Then, imagine who might tackle a Gigi Biopic?

Uncensored and unrestrained, a fuckfest of unapologetic love and insanity between a twenty year old and a man over twice her senior who she loved without boundaries all his life? Hmm.

Maybe Emerald Fennel. We do already have tub slurping, c’mon now.

A scene of Gigi practicing on a random truck driver makes it onto the film. Casting difficulties arise when Baron objects to anyone who he’s had relations with playing his mother. That nixes 89% of the blondes in Hollywood.

Tags:

@prompted-wordsmith

@parodsal000

@ab4eva

@stylespresleyhearted

@presleyenterprise

@kendralavon7

@coolgirl462

@colahola

@lillypink

@stephthestallion

@vintageshanny

@landmermaid12

@ashtag2887

@notstefaniepresley

@butlersluvbot

@steph-speaks

@eliseinmemphis

@lookingforrainbows

@dkayfixates

@ellie-24

@memphisflash1935-1977

@marriedtopresley

@powerofelvis

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@heartbrake-hotel

@fav-fanficssss

@austinbutlersbaby

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@kxnnxy

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@that-hotdog

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@richardslady121

@lilycherries123

@18lkpeters

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@helen06dreamer

@returntopresley

@gonnagoandfangirl

@kelssssxd

@octobers-snow

@velvetelvis

@blursedblegh

[olderthannetfic]

Right, exactly. ‘Bara’ literally means ‘rose’, of course, but it’s pretty equivalent to ‘pansy’ in English, i.e. it’s an old-fashioned slur that some dudes found it entertaining to name things after, including that old magazine Barazoku. (And more power to them. I love Pansy Division, which is the same kind of deal.)

Gei komi are definitely more of a cis gay male culture thing, by, for, and about gay dudes. (Maybe bi dudes? I don’t read enough gei komi to know how they are about mlm who aren’t gay.) Not that they’re always realistic, obviously. That guy getting knocked up by a minotaur really sticks with one! (Yes, I am a basic bitch who has only read Gengoroh Tagame.) But they’re more of a direct representation thing than BL is. Or at least, that’s how they’re marketed and the kind of personas the authors usually have.

AFAIK, the overall category is just ‘gay comics’, and the muscle stuff has some term referring to that with ‘bara’ being more of a foreign language term at this point due to us not cringing like “Oh shit, I just called a dude a pansy”? If you’re hanging out in gay bars in Japan, you may well know more though.

Certainly, an individual artist might try their hand at selling to both gay magazines and BL magazines (with different pen names, one imagines). And certainly, people who like m/m content sometimes stray into other areas looking for more. I don’t want to gatekeep here: they’re obviously not hermetically sealed bubbles. But broadly, the various hairy, muscley, and chubby styles stereotypical of gay comics tend to stay there, and the willowy bishounen tend to stay in the stuff nominally aimed at women. Same with plotlines, styles of porn, yadda yadda. It’s Nifty.org vs. AO3. It’s not as simplistic as “Romance is for girls!” or “All gay men write about coke can dicks!”, but we know the two styles when we see them.

They’re not literally genres in that they’re defined by the target market rather than the content. Theoretically, you could have some muscle porn in a BL magazine and it would then be defined as BL. And we can’t know for sure who is actually creating or consuming them. A cis woman who likes drawing ultra masculine hairy men would presumably go submit to gay mags rather than BL ones.

But we know the ostensible target demographic and the trends that are more typical of one or the other. Gei komi are definitely presented as a gay thing by gay men for gay men. There’s no layer of abstraction like with drag or BL.

[yvesdot]

yves, if only theoretically wanted to break into publishing or lit mags, do you have recommendations or advice?

My primary advice is to get to know as many writers as you can, as well as you can, quickly. I’ve recommended joining Discord servers for this in the past and will do so again; the most active ones I’m in are Max's @goose-books server (I think you have to ask for an invite?), WTW, and writeblr garden. Participate in book events virtually and in person when you can. When you like someone's work, tell them! And mention that you're an author, too.

Disclaimer: I haven't made it into any paid magazines, largely because I find submitting and waiting for months at a time before working on edits exhausting, particularly in comparison to instant money on Patreon—so have that grain of salt at the ready! All I've done is publish the one book, twice, and release a substantial amount of short fiction on my own. People read it and liked it, and now I have lovely anons like you who seem to respect me enough to ask for industry advice. Thank you! Hope you like long posts.

The reason I say the above is that, in my experience, the entirety of publishing is just one big who-do-you-know. Utterly non-exhaustive list of ways "knowing people" has helped me in my writing career below.

I left a middling review on a trans author's book, and in the correspondence that followed we became friends. Rysz Merey went on to start tRaum Books, and because we were friends, we put out the Something's Not Right anniversary edition together.

When I was at my university, I was loudly opinionated about books and writing and art in all of my classes, and a professor's words about me in an email to an author they knew became the blurb for that same edition of Something's Not Right.

I read Tragic Accident (a flash piece originally rejected by an online magazine for, in my opinion, cisgender reasons) last night at Flash Fiction Forum, the heads of which I know personally because, after a high school internship, I was directed to a friend of theirs to volunteer at her writing camp. I sold a lot of copies of the original SNR to teens at that camp, and I've sold dozens of copies since by linking to the book in the Zoom chat and bringing physical copies to in-person readings.

Tragic Accident may have ultimately been rejected from the venue I sent it to, but I only had that venue on my list because my beloved friend Fer @asablehart posted in WTW a spreadsheet of places to submit. I still use that spreadsheet, filled with dozens of extra places I researched on my own, and pass it on to anyone who asks. Fer also read The Traveler Wife and gave extremely insightful feedback on it; we've since done tons of great critique4critiques together and they're still my go-to if I need wise words on a piece of writing.

When I held my event at Bookshop Santa Cruz, I marketed my ass off. I'd learned from my previous event at the Diversity Center in town and focused heavily on reaching out to individual people: posting in Discord servers, DMing everyone I knew, and telling everybody I met in December that by the way I would be reading at Bookshop Santa Cruz in January. I worked my job as an author and my book and my event into every conversation I had with a stranger that month. Everyone responded positively! People want to know what you're working on.

But at the end of the day, under a third of attendees were people I hadn't previously considered friends in some way. The majority of the people who came were family, friends, coworkers, friends-of-friends dragged along by someone I knew well, etc. One coworker couldn't come but invited their housemates, who bought books and left saying they would read Band Girls at home. One of the friends who came met me when we would ride the same bus every week to class, and I initially spoke to him because I fully thought he was a transgender woman (he turned out to just be an extremely fashionable individual). That guy helped code my website. Of the three people who interviewed me locally for promotion, two are people I'm friends with and one I cold-emailed due to his past work.

One of the major servers I used to invite people to both of my events is one I was only added to because I met a goth girl who invited me to her dorm to watch her inject E into her thigh and when I reported back on this to another transfem friend that friend instantly named her because they were in the server together and multiple people in it knew me from my creative writing efforts so everybody agreed to add me. I literally only had that space to network because I said "nice boots" to a girl whose special interest turned out to be DIY HRT at a protest party about the chancellor getting a raise.

Claire Oshetsky came to my event and I made a point of finally starting to read their book beforehand so I could honestly tell them it was cool when I signed their copy of Something's Not Right (it was cool, and everyone should read Chouette, and also Poor Deer, which I am on page 10 on and can already certify is fantastic). They were incredibly nice to me for no reason—well, because of those interviews I had, which led to them noticing another nonbinary author in the area—and ultimately reviewed SNR very positively on GoodReads. You can see what happened to the numbers afterwards. (I also sold a copy that day; when you sell roughly a copy of a book per week, you can absolutely make these connections directly.)

Tonight was Claire Oshetsky's event, so I showed up having read Chouette in full and asked a question during the Q&A and told them how cool their book was, and they invited me to a little post-event author dinner. (One of the authors introduced herself as "Karen" and described a prolific writing career very opaquely until her friend mentioned the name of her latest novel: Booth.) Everyone was incredibly nice and wanted to buy my book which was unfortunately sold out because of the aforementioned event, and a couple of people gave me email addresses so they could buy it later. I've been trying to meet local authors for over a year, and I met seven by accident because one of them came up to me to say it was nice to see Bookshop Santa Cruz had two nonbinary readers in a row.

Talking to David Sedaris at an event got me a job! He complimented my outfit, I said thank you I wore it for the interview with [x], and he did everything he could to help me network with the [x] people there. I was later told that my "chemistry" with Sedaris, among other things, helped me get the position. I would also find out that David specifically loves the last people in the signing line because they're the most patient; I happened to have waited until last because I wanted to have more time to talk to him.

I have emailed several authors with fanmail, and depending on how popular they are, I have gotten responses! I'm in a correspondence right now which netted me a behind-the-scenes look at an incredible draft, and thank you for reminding me because I need to respond and tell them how good it was.

Patreon is on pause right now, but I believe over half the subscribers are people I'm friends with in one way or another. I've tried nearly everything under the sun to advertise, and so far the only thing that's worked is "telling someone who has the disposable income."

The people who beta-read my latest release, Band Girls (18+), for me (which is the only reason it wasn't an unmitigated disaster) include my butch, who met me in a Locked Tomb server (naturally), a friend from a creative writing class in university who later became my housemate, and a good buddy of my butch's whom they rescued from the aforementioned TLT server. I literally didn't even notice that guy when we were in the server together and it turns out he's also a writer with a Giant Lesbian Women project who also wound up really liking Long Line (18+). Glories are all around you.

(Also, apparently my butch had that "how to write a blurb" post bookmarked and immediately recognized me, which is crazy. Imagine meeting some random author in a fandom server and they ask to see your [redacted] in DMs.)

Hell, my buddy Max Franciscovich read my book five years ago in the back of a car and had a transcendental nonbinary lesbian experience, and because he happened to be mutuals with a high school friend of mine, that friend sent me screenshots of him panicking about how he couldn't talk to me because I was too cool. I DMed him, and we are like each other's female husbands now. Undoubtedly we have each gained a substantive reader base from hyping each other's work at anyone in earshot. Maxserver, which I shouted out above, only has me in it because I know the darn guy. It's a lot more populous than yvescord in part because he is that much more active than I am, and can engage with other people's work more. I'm mooching off the labor of my best friend who pseudo-reached-out to me because I put a pronoun pin on a character's bag in the book I self-published in 2018.

Speaking of which: I self-published the original edition of Something's Not Right as a thank-you birthday gift to the Beta Reader. I seem to remember him reading my writing for the first time and saying something along the lines of "You do realize this is really good, right?" (I did not realize.) That was the first person to appreciate any of my original fiction, and it led to my entire career. We met on a class trip because he was the only person who would listen to me talk about Star Wars.

I try to never ingenuinely be nice to people. This is not particularly difficult, because I like people and give the benefit of the doubt to a pretty extreme fault. I will occasionally be nice out of politeness, but everyone I mentioned here is someone I genuinely like whose work is fantastic. It wasn't hard to honestly say I liked them and their writing.

I also recognize that much of this is kind of just me blathering about Ws with no actionable advice... but it might give you ideas for where to go or who to talk to about your writing. I also want you to feel just how much of writing is about "networking" in a way that is not cold and manipulative and moneyhungry but actually just involves being genuine friends with other people. I think the sheer quantity of evidence here is helpful to understand just how much you can do for yourself by talking to the people you like.

I also think it's good practice to own the fact that very little of my microcelebrity success has anything to do with how good my work is. I mean, sure, I think it's good, but this should make it clear that my greatest strength has been my perseverance and my friendliness.

(Also, obviously, I have the immense privilege to have gone to college, to live in California, to get to all these places and meet these people and work with them. I had the money in the bank to publish and promote a book. This is not a small factor. I'm hoping to do a full rundown of costs and efforts to promote Something's Not Right's anniversary edition sometime this year.)

I also don't think I'm particularly good at socializing—I have a knack for saying the wrong thing at the wrong time, a difficulty with meeting people's eyes, and a mild stutter when I talk too quickly (which is often). A lot of people find me annoying or insincere because I act like a sentient powder puff, and when I'm not jumping up and down and meowing at people instead of saying "on your right," I'm complaining about the most widely-beloved pieces of pop culture and making two-hour rant videos about video games I think insufficiently scrutinize the concept of the nuclear family. I say all this to head off any concerns that perhaps I am just secretly very suave and social; I love talking to people, but I don't believe this is the case.

If I can summarize: nearly every time I've had any success with my writing, it's been because I made an effort to be kind to people I respected and share my passion for books and writing. I hit upon enough privileges and lucky circumstances to get the right circle of people to make all of the above happen. I think you can do it, too! I wish you the best. Thanks for asking ^__^

[bridgeportbritt]

Okay, so. First of all this is an awesome question, Sarah! Thank you for sending this. Now, I promise that I had every intention of being chill with this. First I'm like just answer it normally. Then, I thought I could throw some cute little covers together with pics I already had, then it just continued to spiral out of control lol so in true me fashion here are the full covers I created just for this ask hahahah

VOGUE - Ella

So I started with photos I had and this one of Ella from Simblreen last year is one of my favs. I feel like Vogue is very artsy with fashion but loves to highlight women doing the damn thing. So, here's Ella fitting right in with that.

This is long so the rest are under the cut!

SPORTS ILLUSTRATED - Emmitt

So, I've mentioned this before but Emmitt used to be a soccer pro back in his day. He played on his high school's soccer team. There was even talk of him going pro, but his soon after acting out ruined that chance. But, Sports Illustrated def would've been apart of the hyping up of Emmitt's soccer career.

TIME - Diana

Time is known for featuring influential people and who's more influential than a Queen? I got some asks about Royals doing interviews and it got me thinking how rare that is. Things like this happen often without the person's involvement. As you can see, all these photos are from public portraits she's done. Nothing new.

PEOPLE - Bria/Kendall

I really needed an excuse to use these photos I took recently of Bria's first visit to SimDonia for fashion week lol but People is all about gossip and two Simerican influencers visiting or Fashion week makes good gossip. It was hard to think of the side pieces because my worldbuilding was not as fleshed out back then as it is now so enjoy some random stuff lol

FORBES - Bria

This one is kinda sad!!! But, our girl has that business mindset so it only made sense for her to be on this cover. Again, this would be a profile of her, not an interview. The photo is a pap shot of her.

WOMEN'S HEALTH - Olivia

Here's when things took a turn. I did not have a good photo of Olivia for this, so in game we went lol. Next thing you know I'm looking up the exact fonts used for the titles omg. Anyway, Olivia's culinary classes have taught her how to eat better and living with Bria has her working out more. Liv is looking good! But, she's also not about crazy diets so she made sure the cover reflected that. Normally this mag is all about dieting and hating your body garbage. Our good Liv said absolutely not and we love her for it.

MEN'S HEALTH - Gerhard

Poor Gerhard is often getting lost in the background of my story but a lot of his causes are about fitness and health. So, here he is on Men's Health. He did not choose the King of Quads lol Something like this a royal would participate in so they could talk about their charity work.

US WEEKLY - Gianni

Another gossip magazine and this time Gianni is caught in the crossfire. The boys aren't in the tabloids very often especially Grayson as you can see he keeps things very low profile. But, every once in a while something like this will happen. Luckily it's cute and exciting and makes us want to read more!!!

Okay, thank you goodbye.

[sergeant-angels-trashcan]

if you have not seen discowing era dick… you need to. you may rethink the fashion stance lmao 😂 just imagine kate giving him shit for that, which he of course will defend by going after the Infamous Hip Holes

also while he has been a cop (ugh) dick really just picks a career and magically gets it???? like epitome of a nepo baby, bruce just buys him jobs I am CONVINCED. he’s been a social worker, a museum curator, a cop, he owned a crossfit studio (if you see babs on the yoga mat upstairs in GK, it’s a nod to that!), and depending on canon he has a law degree????

and riffing off of that degree… nightwing vs. daredevil rivalry WHEN. they are parkour badasses. they’re street level heroes who are just regular guys. they have fantastic asses. dick you cannot also have a law degree you CANNOT TAKE MATT’S ONE THING— my running joke is that if dick shows up and he’s better than matt at everything, matt might have a Small Existential Crisis

xoxo dickate anon 🩵💜

oh i KNEW about discowing when i called him a fashion boi. I did not specify it was good fashion. nightwing is that one tiktok. "I don't dress for men, I dress for little girls (children?) who have been told at some point in their lives that this is not a fashion show, and for old women drunk on their porch."

also nepo baby dick is hiLArious considering that I have been thinking all day about how in a separate-universes world, everyone in Kate's world thinks he's a golddigger. The tabloids and gossip mags are so confused??? He's a stay at home boyfriend? He literally doesn't have a job. He basically doesn't even exist. Kate's always saying he's home visiting his family, or traveling. Is he a spy? Does he do crime? He didn't know who Captain America was, he's just a himbo. He absolutely could not be a spy. Dick LOVES this, I feel like. It's much funnier when people think that about him than when they think that about Kate (which is what happens when she goes to his universe)

There's a post from forever ago about someone who's supervisor called their partner "Boytoy" at work, like, exclusively. And the guy knew and was fine with it, but anyway he came in one day and the op went "Mr. Toy, I presume?" and he went "The very one." This is very much Dick and Kate. also somehow he meets Anthony Bourdain, and this is a Good Timeline where he's still alive and Dick winds up traveling with him for a few episodes? That would be a fun dichotomy

Kate turns her back for five seconds and Clint and Dick have gone undercover at a circus. Kate expected this from Clint, but Dick knows better. Which prompts Dick explaining that CLINT is the brains of the operation, not Dick, he's the beauty, and Clint getting mad because HE'S the beauty, and Kate just sighs. Clearly neither of you are the brains.

Dick loves that there are no expectations of him in Kate's universe. It's like a vacation. He gets to be a himbo here. There's absolutely a pic of them on insta that he captioned "this barbie is an Avenger. He's just ken" and he will not HEAR Kate's arguments about how technically by Barbie/Ken rules he is also a Barbie. Dick pouts and is like I AM KENOUGH.

All of this leads to a mostly funny conception the Avengers have of Dick. They know he's Nightwing, he doesn't really need a secret identity here, but they don't...get it. He's bouncy and casual because he's still watching Kate's teams, figuring out how best to support, and he doesn't want to step on Kate's toes by accidentally being Too In Charge. So there's this idea that he really IS a himbo until Kate gets injured or captured. If she gets injured on a mission he's on? Look. It clears things up right away. He will absolutely rip apart whatever faction or organization caused that to happen with his bare hands. And God for-fucking-bid he encounters the actual individual responsible for harming her. I'm not saying someone's getting kicked off of a roof but, someone is moving from the roof to the sidewalk in the most expedient way possible.

This is also funny because it makes very clear how different their preferred fighting styles are, because Kate picked A VERY DEFENSIBLE POSITION, please stop worrying, Dick. And she's right! It is! IF YOUR PREFERRED WEAPON IS RANGED.

Now Dick is standing over his mostly unconscious girlfriend who looks like her face got scraped against the ground (because it did), preparing to defend them from all sides. fucking snipers.

It also leads to a fun moment where Kate can't lead. Eli isn't there, so normally command of the team would slide into Cap's purview (if cap and whoever his second is are down, Avengers command would slide over to Kate) so Cap is getting ready to start giving the YA some orders and Dick, not even THINKING about it, just kind of assumes command of the young Avengers and NONE OF THEM QUESTION IT???? He doesn't lead like Kate. He doesn't give orders like Kate, he doesn't even sound like Kate, with cadence or whatever. But there's something that is just kate like enough that her team is like yep this is correct. (The same thing will happen in reverse with the titans) After that the Avengers stop roasting him behind Kate's back.

Also, THE HIP HOLES. look. We need to admit that Kate, canonically, does not have great taste in her avengering uniform. Why did she choose this look? why is she so attached to it?

Like if Kate has the audacity to genuinely criticize discowing?? If for some reason she's wearing a different costume or they got tossed into Gotham in their civvies, her team will absolutely throw her under the bus in order to get brownie points with the batkids.

You can't talk about the deep vee when you had YOUR ENTIRE ABDOMEN OUT BABE. Nothing! Not even a tissue! The body confidence is great Kate but seriously how did you not die. (he's into the scarf, though)

And if Kate actually wears the hip holes? Dick is poking at her trying to figure out if they're actually holes? Is there mesh there? Is it flesh toned fabric? No?? It's actually holes? This man is going to stick his hand in one just to see because what the fuck, Kate, and Kate's going to be like. Dick. Dickie. Nightwing. Your hand is under my costume. Do you realize where your hand is.

Is THAT what it's for?!?!? Dick is now seeing how far he can get his hand. The small of her back? Her other hip? Their friends are scREAMing. Guys? Could you do this some other time?? Like maybe when we're NOT ON FUCKING PATROL?????

anyway now Dick is wondering how far he can actually get his hand inside her uniform and he WASN'T thinking about it Like That before but he sure is now

[darklydeliciousdesires]

Not One of Many - Chapter Fifteen.

Are you ready for this, guys? Because I don’t think you’re ready... ;) and thank you all for your lovely comments and continued interest. I have so much love for my devoted audience!! 

Previous chapters - Prologue  One  Two  Three  Four  Five  Six  Seven  Eight  Nine  Ten  Eleven  Twelve  Thirteen  Fourteen

Tag list - In the comments

Words - 3,590

Warnings - 18+ content, adult audience only. Minors DNI!

“Well, your face don’t half match the weather,” Magda began, she and Oliver viewing their friend where she sat across the table from them next to Kinga, looking up from her phone a little dazed.

“Hmm?”

“I’d say you were away with the fairies, but such magical little creatures so full of zest and cheer could never be responsible for a face like that, darling,” Oliver observed. “I don’t understand it either! You’re the talk of town with your article, you wrote an absolute bloody hit! Like Mags correctly identifies, your face exactly matches this bloody rain currently blighting our lovely day out!”

It had been two and a half weeks since she’d last seen the subject of her article, the piece published four days previous to then, earning Beth rave reviews from her peers, new work offers flooding in and the kind of publicity she usually wouldn’t have sniffed at whatsoever. None of it mattered without him.

“Hung up, ain’t she? I fucking told you, didn’t I?” Her reminder that she’d indeed told her so was delivered in her usual blunt fashion, but Magda softened then, sensing Beth’s need for it. “I’m so bloody proud of you, though, for not forsaking your morals, your pride. You did the right thing in walking away from him, sugar plum. You always said, you ain’t one of many, and you proved it. Hold your head up high for that, my precious. If he can’t see it, ain’t your problem.”

“Exactly this, because there aren’t many women who wouldn’t have had that strength, to realise their feelings and still walk away with their worth intact,” Oliver chimed, stroking her arm kindly. “You’re so strong, and I know it hurts, lovely, I know how much it must be weighing on you, but Mags is absolutely correct. You did the right thing.”

Kinga sighed then, sweeping a hand through her hair. “I feel responsible. I was nothing but on board and cheerleading your decision to go and sleep with him, and now look at you. Downcast and forlorn, when you should be celebrating your success.”  

“I’m not forlorn,” Beth began. “And it isn’t your fault either. You didn’t drive me there and kick me through the doors of The Pendulum against my will. I tried to hide how I felt for the sake of hot sex, and I was wrong to think that I could. I’m nearly thirty, I’m a big girl now, capable enough of making her own decisions and mistakes. I’ll be fine, honestly. I just need a little bit of time to pass, especially in the wake of the article being published. I’m so sorry for being glum, I’m such a bloody wet blanket.”

“No, you ain’t at all!”

“Oh, baby, don’t say that!”

“Darling, don’t be silly!”

They all separately chorused the above, reaching for her again, Oliver and Magda taking a hand each while Kinga wrapped her in a hug. She felt a little teary, excusing herself to go to the ladies, her friends all watching her walk away before they huddled in a little.  

“I want to go smack him in the mouth, truth be told, but I can’t cus’ it ain’t even the bloke's fault! He’s been honest with her, told her how it is and all, and I get it. He’s into polygamy and she ain’t. Isn’t anyone’s fault, although quietly I think he’s a bit mental, not seeing that wonderful girl is enough for any man all on her own.”

“I’m too sissy to hit people, but I could certainly go in for a bit of toe stomping and pushing him in stinging nettles!” Oliver chimed, Kinga laughing softly before she added her two pence worth.

“I hope he comes around. I hope he’s realising just how miserable life is without that vibrant, wonderful girl of ours. Then again, I always wish for the fairy tale.”

“And if it don’t happen, then we just have to keep her spirits up until she’s over it,” Magda sighed, picking up her cigarettes. “Back in a bit.”  

Being there for her was the main aim of their day out, starting with breakfast before hitting the shops and heading to a spa for some pampering treatment and lunch, before dinner and then onto a bar for drinks. It was the first day in weeks all four of them didn’t have other plans or work commitments, their catch up and luxuriate day rebranded a little bit as a cheer Beth up day.  

In the ladies' room, the lady herself dried her eyes, making sure her false eyelashes were still well-adhered, quickly lining her eyes again and taking a few deep breaths. Magda was right, it was his loss. But that didn’t stop it being hers as well. He’d never look at her again like he did when he’d perched her upon the sink, deep inside of her but still, staring at her in a way that made her insides catch fire. Never again, and she hated her principles for it as well, but she would not budge.  

She hated herself for that even more.  

“Come on, Beth. You’re made of tougher stuff than this. Time to pull yourself together, you’ve had your two weeks to be sad now.” Straightening her high waisted trousers a little, she smoothed the silk of the grey (which she guessed she did suit, finally relenting to Magda’s insistence) camisole she wore, fixed her smile in place and walked back out to her friends.  

“There’s that lovely smile I feared we wouldn’t see any time soon,” Oliver chimed happily as she sat, her breakfast waiting for her at the table.  

“I can but try, at least.” Kinga made a little fuss of her, rubbing her arm sweetly before she tucked into her turkey bacon and scrambled eggs, Magda arriving back with them.  

For the rest of the day, she immersed herself in the warmth of her friends, from parading outfits for Oliver, who critiqued or praised (as per his career as a fashion critic) to spending far too much money as a result of that due to her persisting emotional instability. What is a girl to do when she finds Agent Provocateur underwear for a third off, or a pair of Ralph Lauren jeans that weren’t, but she just had to have? With work coming her way left and right, a little splurge was in order. She definitely reminded herself of this after spending nine hundred and eighty-five pounds on a Balmain bag, and over two hundred pounds on a bottle of bath oil, candle and matching perfume. Jo Malone was a dangerous experience for her every time she entered the shop.  

An hour on and they were all lying in a line in the massage suite of the spa, being kneaded thoroughly by talented hands, the man pummelling Beth’s back working out a series of clicks that made her feel much better for the release of pressure. Now, perhaps next for that emotional release of tension. A cocktail out in the gardens, swathed in a fluffy robe afterwards saw to it somewhat, but beneath her cheer, the little tender spot still prickled.  

One swim, a facial and a manicure later and she was feeling fully restored, ready to head back into central London where they had reservations at their favourite bar and grill in Soho, seated at a window table, looking out at the sky.

“It’s going to bloody shit it down again soon, look at them clouds!” Magda exclaimed, the sky dark and foreboding, the break in rain giving way to the kind of heat that usually did stir up the sort of summer storm the four were anticipating as they gave the waiter their drinks orders, all deciding on the share grill platter pretty quickly.  

“Please keep the pork products separate from the rest, though. My friend here is Jewish,” Oliver asked the waiter, Beth smiling. She never had to speak such herself, her friends were always so quick to do so for her.  

“Oh, same as. You’re just the kind of girl my mother would be delighted if I brought home, too,” the waiter spoke with a little flourish of flirt, Beth smiling shyly. She just wasn’t ready to entertain anything of such a nature, though. “I’ll be right back with your drinks, guys.”  

They thanked him, Beth quickly checking her phone, smiling when she saw that the article she had written for The Times last week while in the depths of Alfie-related despair had actually been accepted, her prose being why women felt so pressured to have it all, and inevitably felt as if they’d fallen short, should they lack one out of the lovely home, good job and loving partner triangular goal.  

Her friends congratulated her warmly, Magda asking a passing waiter to bring them a bottle of Moet, Beth attempting to protest.  

“I won’t hear of it, duchess. This is The Times; it calls for a celebration!”

Duchess. He’d often called her that.  

With champagne proffered speedily, a cork popped, flutes filled and a toast to her success raised, she stuffed back down the little glimmering shard of remembrance of her lost love, sipping back a mouthful of pure indulgent bubbles and fixing her smile once more.  

“So, my wonderful lot. It’s the ELLE summer style party in three weeks on Saturday and I of course have guest privileges. Can I put you all down as attending?” Magda asked a time later as they all helped themselves to the scrumptious looking food before them, being met by three very enthusiastic nods. “Perfect! You’ll have to get your own clobber together, though, naturally. If my editor sees you in anything from our wardrobe, it’ll be my head on the bleedin’ chopping block!”

Beth was just thinking on what on earth she had in her summer wardrobe to wear when her phone began to ring, looking over at the display to see a number she recognised immediately. She’d deleted it after vowing to move on, but the fact Alfie’s mobile ended in three twos and three fives was instantly recognisable.  

She nearly brought back up her mouthful of chicken, staring at the screen a little wide eyed before cancelling the call. Ten minutes later, and he tried again.  

“Who keeps calling you, darling?” Kinga asked, grappling with a butter swathed segment of corn on the cob, trying her best to eat it somewhat neatly in an effort not to completely ruin her makeup.  

“Alfie.” Three pairs of eyes landed on her in stares of disbelief. “I’m not answering it.”  

“Aren’t you even a teeny little bit curious over what he could be calling for?” Kinga asked lightly, Magda snorting.  

“Unless it’s to say he’s chucked his girlfriends and finally come to his senses that our girl is the best bloody thing that’s ever happened to him, then it ain’t worth answering!”

“But she wouldn’t know that, unless she did answer,” Kinga reasoned, Oliver chiming in.

“This is very true. Beth might be a brilliant wordsmith, but a psychic, she is not.”

“I’m still not answering,” she vowed, her phone ringing again, Beth refusing the call once more. A few minutes passed, her chicken breast finished as she moved onto the coleslaw, before a message notification came through. Everyone bar her stared at her phone. “What? I’m finishing my meal, freshening up, enjoying a few more sips of my wine and then I shall see what the bloody hell he wants.”

“Spoilsport.” Magda muttered, bobbing her tongue out playfully, making her laugh softly. She made a point of not rushing the itinerary of what she’d pledged would come before reading the message, although the anticipation absolutely killed her. By the time she did open it to read, her heart was hammering, her mouth dry.  

‘I need to talk to you, Beth. Where are you? I came by your flat, but you obviously ain’t home.’

“So, what did he say?” Oliver asked, eyes wide.  

“He says he needs to talk and asks where I am. Apparently he went to my flat.”

“What are you going to tell him?” Kinga questioned, excited.

“Guys, give her breathing room, Christ on water skis!” Magda then exclaimed, holding out her hands.

“Give me a minute.” Picking up her phone, she left the table, heading outside, the distant rolls of thunder soft in the sky, the heat beginning to die down. Except within Beth Drake, who felt like she needed to go and stand in a meat fridge. There was only one way to discover what it was he wished to talk to her about.  

Holding the phone to her ear after pressing call, she felt her heart at the back of her throat, her hands tingling as she heard the phone ring out.  

“Hello, darlin’. Thanks for calling back.” Her stomach tingled and her heart did a little backflip, hearing his voice again.  

“What do you want, Alfie?” she asked coolly, chewing her lip with nerves.  

“As I said in my message, I need to talk to you. Where are you?”  

“Alfie, I said I was cutting ties with you,” she began, being swiftly interrupted.

“It’s about why you had to do that, that I have to talk to you. Where are you?”

She felt her throat tightening, trying to hold back the words that flew from her mouth before she’d had a chance to process. “Sophie’s in Soho.” Shit.  

“Gimme half hour and I’ll be there. This is important, I can’t do it over the phone. See ya in a bit.”

He hung up before Beth had time to answer, turning and heading back inside, striding to the bar.  

“Can I get two shots of gold Patron, please?” she asked the server, the girl nodding before placing the shot glasses on the table and dutifully filling them. One Apple Pay transaction later, two tequila shots were sunk, and Beth was only marginally calmer.  

“Well?” Magda asked as soon as she sat down.  

“He’s on his way over, said he’ll be half an hour.”

“What?” all three chorused.  

“He said he needed to talk to me, I told him that I said I was cutting ties with him and was about to continue with how I wanted for him to respect my wishes there, but before I got chance to, he said it was about why I did that, that he needed to see me,” she explained, her heart still hammering madly.  

“Well, if this is...” Kinga began.

“Nope! No! Nobody speak a word about it, nope! I need radio silence while I sit here and work myself into a panic while attempting to drown it in Soave.” Lifting her wine glass, she sank it, Oliver quick to top it up again.  

“Okay, change of subject. Did we all see that utter hatchet piece Alex Martin-Smith wrote on the AW 2022 Versace collection last week?” Magda offered, all four of them falling into conversation over how unfair they’d found it, such a blazing critique of Donatella’s work, of which they were all huge admirers. Even though the topic had changed, Beth felt sick with nerves within, continuing to drain her wine with such gusto, another bottle was ordered for the table.  

The minutes crept by, with her keeping one eye on the street, until she picked him out, her heart somersaulting. “He’s almost here. I’m going outside.”  

“Good luck, darling. We love you.” Kinga offered, kissing her arm, Oliver and Magda squeezing her hands.  

“No compromises unless he’s offering you all, baby,” Oliver reminded her.

“Any bullshit and tell him your feisty bestie will knock him out.” Magda vouched, giving her the little chuckle she needed as she walked away from the table, heading outside and waiting for him, spots of rain in the air. Looking down the street, she saw him look up and smile. Her heart did a somersault, her skin feeling hot and prickly as her temperature rose, mixing with the summer heat.  

A tempest of nerves whirled within her, her pulse flipping madly, summing up composure from her depths, her head an absolute mess as anticipation claimed her. Still, she would be cool and calm in the face of seeing him again, reminding herself of that when he finally stopped before her.  

“Hello, duchess.” Her knees felt weak, hearing him say that, his scent flooding her nose, her mind being transported back to when she’d first smelled him, how intoxicating she’d found it. “Look, I know I’m the last person you likely want to see, but I had to see ya, right? I need to talk.”

“About what?”

Seeing a group of people coming up behind her, he touched a hand to her arm to move her over, the spot tingling beneath his touch. “About us.”

She shook her head, her heart panging with sadness. “There is no us, Alfie. Not while you’re living the lifestyle you do. Like I said, I don’t expect you not to either, you just can’t have me, too.”

“Well, that’s the thing, darlin’,” he began, taking a breath, actually looking a little nervous. “I’m not living that lifestyle any longer. I’m single.”

She felt as if a firework had gone off in her chest at hearing those words, her hands shaking, her mouth going dry. “You... you finished with them?” she whispered, bewildered. It couldn’t be, could it? Was she about to get what she’d coveted so very much?

“Half and half. Mimi broke up with me, because she knew she wasn’t the one who made me truly happy any longer, and off the back of that, I ended my relationship with Amira.”

“Why?” she blurted, feeling like an idiot instantly, Alfie chuckling, taking her face in his hands.

“Because I’ve gone and fuckin’ fallen in fuckin’ love with you, ain’t I? Can’t fuckin’ bear to live another fuckin’ minute without you either!”

“Could you have crammed more F words in there?”  

He looked thoughtful, tickled by her witty retort. “Probably. So, what do you think? Think this foolish man who took way too long to admit to himself there was only one woman for him is worth it?”

There he was, Alfie Solomons, the man famed for his multiple girlfriends and unapologetic stance over dating them, single, having taken the steps he needed, all for her. Because he was in love with her.  

“Of course, you bloody are.” He beamed, leaning down to kiss her, the shrieking cheers of her friends from inside making her laugh a little into their kiss, before it deepened, her heart blooming. It never happened like this for her, it always went wrong somehow, until now. Until it went right.  

At that exact moment, overhead, a boom of thunder shook the sky, people all around beginning to exclaim as the rain duly pelted down.

“Alfie, it’s raining,” she breathed, his thumbs stroking her cheeks.

“Well, we’re getting wet then, ain’t we?” he kissed her again, a kiss unbreakable, unstoppable by even the raging storm that rendered London a wash from the furious cascade. It was a moment so perfect, right there, they were every romantic cliché in the world, the rain soaking them through, but their care over such non-existent as their love bloomed. As if it couldn’t get more complete, the opening bars to a song that made all the hairs on the back of Alfie’s neck stand up began to filter out from the bar.  

“Fuckin’ ‘ell!” he exclaimed, laughing, kissing her again. “She Sells Sancturary. How bloody apt. Because you do.”

“I like to think I give it freely rather than for a monetary exchange.”

“I’ll put me Amex away then, ay?”

She giggled, stroking his face, never witnessing him smile like he was right then, right at her. “I think we should go in, eventually. Besides, we have an expectant audience.” Turning, they saw Magda, Oliver and Kinga all at the window, applauding with huge grins.  

“Eventually.” He confirmed. They continued to kiss, not a care in the world, Ian Astbury’s lyrics reigning so true for Alfie as he lost himself fully to his heart’s desire.

The fire in your eyes keeps me alive And the fire in your eyes keeps me alive I'm sure in her you'll find sanctuary I'm sure in her you'll find sanctuary

At last. He’d found it, after looking in all the wrong places for so many years, he’d found his sanctuary, right there in her.  

“I love you,” she breathed, nuzzling her nose against his.  

“Good! Because I am lovable when I’m not being a stupid tosser. So, you gonna take me in to meet your friends after I’ve gone and rung me shirt out?”

“Yeah, come on.” Taking his hand, she led him out of the rain, Alfie heading to the toilets while Beth ran to the table, hugging her friends in triumph, giving them a very quick explanation before raiding her shopping bags for the lovely, black maxi dress she’d bought, figuring she needed to change. One long stay under the hand dryer later to dry her hair, and she was back at the table, a considerably dryer, but still damp Alfie joining them after a few minutes.  

“So, you’re the silly sod who took your bloody time with this one then, ay?” Magda asked, arching an eyebrow as he sat down, pulling Beth onto his lap.  

He took her hand, kissing it as he smiled at her, so in love, he felt like he was about to burst. “Guilty as charged.”

[fourseasonsfigs]

Little Farmer Jun

If I went back in time and told myself 5 years ago that one day I'd be writing a blog post about a collectible figure (that not only did I own but had in fact avidly collected) of a mainland Chinese actor dressed as a high-fashion sexy exterminator in a enormous fluffy yellow hat, I would have been very concerned. I would have 1) thought future Lelanthe had lost her ever-loving mind, 2) wondered how exactly was it that someone who had lost every single marble could even have dreamed up a chain of events leading up to that particular scenario?

Truth is stranger than fiction, my figthusiast friends.

The inspiration for this fig, and many others, all of which you will be seeing in the future, is Gong Jun's frankly rather incredible November 2022 Cosmopolitan Magazine photo shoot:

Yes, I own this mag, and I regret nothing. NOTHING, I SAY!

In order to fully appreciate this mag, I think you need a behind-the-scenes video. Here you go, my friends who have gone down this very unique life path with me...

The inspiration for this particular fig is of course this:

What in the name of all that is holy was someone thinking when they put this outfit together, I just don't know. This mag shoot was the one that that got me to the point that I don't even question this stuff anymore. I mean, look at him. The outfit is ridiculous but his face is stunning as always, his legs look a million miles long, his arms look strong, and his shoulders are broad enough to carry this look off.

The fig maker called this fig a farmer, but let's be real - it's an exterminator. Yes, I suppose farmers can have spray packs too, for exterminating pests! May I just say that I get my house sprayed on the regular for pest control, and never ONCE has any exterminator looked even vaguely like this. Disappointing. Tragic, really.

Here he arrived on my doorstep, swaddled up protectively in his polystyrene case, with his little spray wand accompanying him.

My heart does sink a little bit each time I see an accessory with a fig. The question of will-it-won't-it fit is always a pertinent one when you're as clumsy as I am. You can see his little curled right hand there that is meant to hold the handle like in the picture.

Luckily, the handle fit well into his hand - I kind of had to push it a bit harder than I'd like to get it to stay, but once it was there it was (relatively) secure.

This little man wasn't standing on his own for anything. You'll see why a little more clearly as we rotate around the figure, but basically he's unbalanced because of all his equipment on his back, along with this gigantic hat.

Speaking of the hat, it's pretty amazing. Not only do we have this great knit texture on the hat itself, we have flocking on the ear muffs! Amazing.

All my figs get a soapy water bath to clean them when they arrive (I've seen some factory production pictures!). Unfortunately, I was going on autopilot with this last shipment of figs, and I accidentally dunked this little guy in the soapy bath. I immediately yelped and grabbed him right back out. I hated to soak him even more by rinsing him off, but at that point there was nothing to be done, other than cursing my own name. I was worried I had damaged the flocking, but he seems to have dried up just fine!

No harm done. There's a few different figs with flocking in production right now, so just as well I learned from this one!

There is a TON of detail on this fig. Kind of amazing looking at it - there is a lot going on. Credit to Junjun again that he was wearing this outfit in the pics vs. it wearing him. The factory work is remarkably clean too, nice and sharp paint lines.

You can see there that he is holding the little spray handle just fine. I was not a fan of this outfit in the magazine, but I kind of love this fig.

He's so cute. When visitors come over and look at my fig displays, I can promise you this is one they will definitely ask about!

So fancy, Junjun, with your Tiffany jewelry!

This is a good shot of his hand holding the sprayer. Actually a great shot of both of his hands.

It's really interesting to me that there's a little hole here in his spray backpack. I wonder if there was originally plans to put the spray tube in? There's the full tubing in the magazine pic, and you can see it in the video, so I wonder.

Look at all that detail in the knit hat. Incredible!

Unfortunately, this entire series came without box art or box cards, so that's it for pics. There's more in this series coming, so stick around if you'd like to see more!

Material: Resin and some kind of flocking, Calico Critters-style

Fig Count: 418

Scene Count: 29

Rating: No bugs here, Ma'am

[link back to Master Fig Index for more posts]

[crownedmango]

Second tim's the charm...Randal Graves headcanons perchance? make me laugh, make me cry, make me every emotion listed in the family guy theme song

Oh hoo hoo lemme see what I can do for this

• Never sits right and sits on things he shouldn't. Those picnic tables at the park? Sits on the table with his feet on the bench, Countertop? Sat directly on it, Normal ass chair? It’s been turned around so the back of it acts as an armrest, a perfectly good park bench? Nah, sits on the ground and plucks the grass

• Honestly I don’t even think he really pays attention to what's in the adult mags he reads anymore unless it’s something he can critique or make fun of. Sure he was interested in them, but at some point if you’ve seen one, you’ve seen them all - he also likes the fact that people just being in the vicinity of someone browsing those kinds of mags, they instantly get pissy, like a fucking debuff in a video game

• You know how he’s chewing gum constantly? It’s a chewing stim he has, he used to chew on other things such as pencils, his own lip, anything really, but it would screw up his mouth too much and so Dante had to help him find something that would be better, which introduced his addiction to gum. He usually buys small basic packs of gum that are easy to chew and keep in his pocket, but god is he obsessed with Big League chew - especially the grape flavour - and will always pluck it from the Quick Stops shelves for himself if they have some in stock

• Loves finding just the shitiest movies possible. If you’ve ever seen RedLetterMedia’s Best of The Worst series on YouTube, those are the sort of movies he will find and show the other’s during their movies nights, which leads to the group discussing the movies in a similar fashion as they do on the series - Since it’s October as of this post, I recommend watching their halloween video from last year the get a good idea of what I mean: https://youtu.be/R5xa7r6oIBQ

• He's embarrassed about it, but he adores elaborate cosplays, especially Star Wars ones. Wherever he’s at a convention for one reason or another, he always appreciates when cosplayers add even the small details of their costumes. He has a cosplay stuffed into his closet that he’s working on to be perfect, if anyone happens to see it he just says it’s an old costume from a halloween party he forgot to throw away

• Genuinely tries to be a good person, sure he’s a hard ass and seemingly uncaring, but he really does care about his friends deeply. His friends and co-workers are the only real family he actually has, his home and family life - besides his cousin Brodie - isn’t too great. Unfortunately his family has caused his toxic traits to form and be more apparent, but being friends with Dante has allowed him to start fixing himself and his behavior, as his friend helps him realize how his family has exposed him to more distasteful and aggressive behaviors. You’ve got to just have patience with him

• One night, in his sleep, he had a vision - he describes it as a dream, but he’s also never told anyone about this - this vision was set at the block of stores he and his partner Dante worked at, in fact, Randal had just left the Quick Stop to go towards RST Video when he heard the noise, that loud, piercing, unforgettable sound of a gun firing, it rang through his ears, shook him to his core. He froze, his hand clenching onto the set of keys he had to RST, he heard the door to Quick Stop slam open, a cracking sound from the sheer force of how the door opened causing his head to snap over to see a man sprinting for his life. He stood frozen, as much as he wanted to chase after the man, beat him black and blue, he couldn't, but he forced himself to at least get back into the Quick Stop, and when he did, he saw a sight that would burn into his memory forever. Dante, laying against the wall, simply slumped over and sitting in a pool of his own blood… then Randal wakes up, his mouth dry, tears welling up in his eyes… and this dream appears again every so often, a form of torment, he’s assumed…

[lonelyasawhisper]

Records

Creem, 1st March 1977

Queen - A Day At The Races by Billy Altman

(Elektra)

When Queen was first kicking around the airwaves, one was tempted to giggle at, and possibly even enjoy, their heavy metal meets the National Barbershop Quartet Society sound. "Liar" was lots of fun, especially if you were a devout Catholic and it generally appeared that Queen was well on its way to grabbing Jethro Tull's guilt ridden crown of thorns which lan Anderson had blown by showing his true colors once too often via Passion Play and Queen didn't appear to be too serious about all this stuff either. Of course, A Night At The Opera screwed up that notion completely. A good friend of mine who sees AM radio's biggest value as motivator through pain—not so much that you want to drive with the radio on as wanting to get where you're going quicker so that you no longer have to have it on—just loves to throw "Bohemian Rhapsody" on the jukebox at bars because it used to help us all drink quicker so that we wouldn't care if it was on or not. With that album though Queen ceased to be a joke, trading reservations in the pew for a box at the Met. Uh, uh—that's where I get off fella—the Mothers of Invention's "Brown Shoes Don't Make It" was more than enough for me.

So here's A Day At The Races (what's next? Monkey Business, Room Service or Love Happy?) and there's a terminal cuteness about this album that is, to be brutally frank, as sickening as Chastity Bono. La-dee-dah, "I'm A Good Old-Fashioned Lover Boy," "You Take My Breath Away," (hubba-hubba) and, oh yes, "The Millionaire Waltz" (did you know that Freddie Mercury buys rare paintings in his spare time?). It does go on. Plenty of music hall bravura—Freddie Mercury as the King Sisters, except that Brian May is not Alvino Rey. Actually, Brian May hardly does much of anything on this album which means that unless you're a rock 'n' roll pansy you're not going to like this record very much (obviously these guys never got their tickets to Suffragette City).

Now that they're such good buddies with us Yanks they think they can throw in a tune like "White Man" (two words; these clown have obviously never read R. Crumb), about the plight of the Indians. Personally, I'd rather have Mark Lindsay's remake of "Indian Reservation" or "Please Mr. Custer" than this piece of "we're holier than you and besides it's not even our problem." But that's not the topper —the last track is "Teo Terriatte (Let Us Cling Together)" (cling, cling, as in static; somebody should have thrown a sheet of Bounce into the final mix), with chorus in a foreign language, Japanese I think. Now on the cover of this mag it says "America's Only Rock 'n' Roll Magazine" so if you want to do something for your country, cut out the last track and mail it to your Tokyo pen pal from high school who you never wrote back to, namely because you couldn't understand their English. Maybe he or she will appreciate it. In fact, why don't you mail them the whole album? And thank you for being an American.

Bonus:

Mail

Creem, 1st May 1977

Incest Is A Family Affair

I just read your article on Queen by Billy Altman and I hated it, in fact, I think it sucked out loud! I have most of the magazines on Queen and I never read a most rotten [Definitely, sic!—Ed.] article. If you write about a group you should build them up, not put them down. I'm not the only one to feel this way so Billy Altman..."Bite My Ass" 'cause Queen is Num. 1!

Mary Beth Barber

Charlotte, N.C.

(You've got a point...they're "num", all right. — Ed.)

Retrieved from The Creem Archive

[libradoodle1]

Libra! Happy belated birthday I’m sorry my present is so late, I think @youwerenevermine teased it to you, a drabble to go with her gorgeous moodboard. 🥰 Since it’s taking forever, here is a belated gift— a teaser!

Sweet, lovely, beautiful Dany though was trying. it had been her idea. She wanted to get him back to nature, since he had moved south from Winterfell to King's Landing for her, for her job and sh eknew he missed the cold North. They couldn't get all the way up to Winterfell so the Vale was the closest thing.

He had other plans for his birthday, but kept his mouth shut, as she did the best she could. Each time he tried to change the subject, to get to a point where, maybe he could do what the'd been planning to do for the last six months, and Dany did something to upend the situation.

In her quest to give him the perfect birthday, Dany was somehow messing it up.

Bless her, he thought, as she had zero idea.

He thought of the ring buried deep in his inner coat pocket; ecah time she'd gone to shake out the coat, he'd pounced on it. After three days, he suspected she just thought him oddly attached to the garment. It had been in his head for months he would propose on his birthday. Knowing Dany, she would do somethin gspecial as she had the entire five years they were together, and he would turn the tables on her and ask her to marry him, as the best birthday gift he could ever have.

"Dany," he began. He was going to do it. Right here, right now. With dried blood on his face and a filthy smelly dog and mountain goat shit scattered through the camp. He stood up and went over to stop her from trying to make the terrible camp coffee she'd gotten at the sporting goods store. It tasted like oil. "Dany, you're freezing, here." He had a great idea; he took off his coat and went to drape it over her shoulders, but she stood so fast, she knocked him backwards.

"Oh! I'm sorry!"

He wheezed, having hit a log on the ground hard. "No problem!" Bloody seven hells.

Dany looked upa t the sky, a fresh rumble of thunder. "Seven hells!" she screamed, stomping her foot in a most un-Dany-like fashion. Her silver braids were a knotted, dirty mess on her shoulders and she was almost in tears. "I looked at the weather, I swear I did!"

"We weren't planning on coming this high up," he tried to comfort her, but she wouldn't hear it.

"This has been a diaster, I'm sick of it!" She kicked over the coffee can, sending it into the flames, which spout up and caught. They both stared at it. Maybe it was oil. She sniffed, her nose red and slightly swollen from the cold. She was getting sick too, but he wouldn't tell her that. She refused to believe it.

He stood up and reached for her, drawing her close. "Dany, shhh, it's alright. It's been fun!"

"You're lying."

"No I'm not, you know I can't lie!" And indeed, he couldn't, because his ears were turning pink and he was trying to avoid her piercing violet eyes, accusing him. He heaved a deep sigh. "I think maybe camping just isn't our thing."

"But it's supposed to be fun!"

"Hmm." Yes, but this definitely wasn't. He scratched his beard. "Maybe it's the Vale." It was cursed or something. It was just rocky and cold and rainy. Definitely not the mountains in winterfell.

Dany snuggled into his chest, her voice muffled. "I wanted you to have a good birthday."

"It is a good birthday!"

"Jon, the mountain goats ran off with your cake!"

Aye, they did. They'd discovered it this morning when she wanted to present it to him, but found it missing. Or else Ghost ate it. He was betting Ghost ate it.

Omg, Mags!!! 😂😂😂😂❤️❤️❤️

First off, thank you so much! I had no idea the camp story you were going to write was for me! 🥹. Erika told me and I just chalked it up to Mag’s and her million one ideas! So thank you making me one of the million and ones 😍🤭

I’m a sucker for camp fics. And humor! Cracky humor, specifically, and this made me giggle. The oil coffee that he’s forcing himself to drink, the bloody face, awful weather, being knocked on his ass…😂 Poor Jon! But ofc he loves his Dany so much so he goes along for the proposal 😍

However, I wasn’t prepared for the goat running away with his cake!!! Wth???!!! 🤣🤣🤣 The image of that is too much.

Thank you so much! You’re so sweet to write a story for me. This teaser was so funny I can’t wait to read the entire thing.

[havenroyals]

Set your calendars. We're gearing up for a noble wedding.

Lady Zenobia Walker is engaged to futbol star and World Cup winner Lorenzo Blackmon. The last noteworthy wedding to come out of the Haven Royal Court was the union between Barthélemy Beaumont and Luciana Holloway two years ago. The couple, formally known as Marquis & Marquise of Hexton, are anticipating the arrival of their first child. The little bundle should be here within a few weeks.

The heiress to the duchy of Lykke reportedly met her fiance during the Paralympic Games. The athlete was a coach, and Zen was in the stands with her father, Godfather, and royal twins. When the games were held in Haven three years ago, the Crown Princess played matchmaker for her bestie and the heartthrob.

Zen does love the athletes. Remember that scandalous breakout she went through in her teens. The difference this time around is Lorenzo has the full support of Sir Drake, Zenobia's father. Not only does Lorenzo calm down Zenobia's "over the top" nature, but he also supports her judgments.

A source close to the Nevrakis-Walker family said, "Drake was a fan of the Dragons - Lorenzo's futbol team - but that flipped when Zenobia became involved. Protecting his daughter is Drake's priority, not getting autographs. Lorenzo really had to earn Walker's respect. He did - with flying colors." Another says: "I think Drake and Olivia saw themselves in the next generation; Zen and Lorenzo are opposites that attract. Maybe it shouldn't work, but they do. I have never seen Zen so happy."

Speaking of family, Lorenzo comes from the Blackmon family. His father, Kaleb Blackmon, is the eccentric patriarch and founder of the fashion house, BlaqueMon. The brand is renowned amongst celebrities and has been ranked in the top ten by fashion mags for the last decade. Kaleb made headlines for never marrying and using the same anonymous surrogate to birth his five children. The four Blackmon daughters - Lorenzo's older sisters - have inspired the fashion house's most successful collections.

Top to bottom, left to right: Tania, Jordyn, Aisha, Logan, and Lorenzo.

The Blackmons are rumored to be thrilled about the upcoming wedding, and Kaleb is planning a collection dedicated to his daughter-in-law.

Lorenzo and Zenobia are sure a dashing couple. Congratulations!

GQ ISSUE I | Previous | Next

[heavensbeehall]

"Catching Fire", Chapter 21

Part 3: The Enemy

Chapter 21: The poisonous fog continues to chase them. Finnick bounds away (with Mags still asleep! hope the Gamemakers appreciated those champion nap skillz), but Peeta and Katniss have trouble. Peeta's artificial leg hinders him and the poison attacks his nerves, making his legs move in a "puppet-like fashion." Finnick returns for them and he carries Peeta and Katniss attemps to carry Mags. But Mags sacrifices herself to the Fog. Then they run right into the monkey sector and the female morphling sacrifices herself.

Heroes of the Revolution: Mags, Unnamed Female Morphling

Quotes:

Finnick has come back for us and is hauling Peeta along. I wedge my shoulder, which still seems under my control, under Peeta's arm and do my best to keep up with Finnick's rapid pace. We put about ten yards between us and the fog when Finnick stops.

"It's no good. I'll have to carry him. Can you carry Mags?"

If Katniss has to push down the urge to run without Peeta, I can't imagine how hard it is for Finnick to abandon Mags and go back for them.

Now I'm so thankful I didn't kill Finnick, because how would I have gotten Peeta out of here alive?

Slight progression on Katniss' feelings toward Finnick. Last time, grateful he saved Peeta but sort of annoyed. Now thankful, no annoyance.

I can see Finnick's eyes, green in the moonlight. I can see them as clear as day. Almost like a cat's, with a strange reflective quality. Maybe because they are shiny with tears. "No," he says. "I can't carry them both. My arms aren't working." It's true. His arms jerk uncontrollably at his sides. His hands are empty. Of his three tridents, only one remains and it's in Peeta's hands. "I'm sorry, Mags. I can't do it." What happens next is so fast, so senseless, I can't even move to stop it. Mags hauls herself up, plants a kiss on Finnick's lips, and then hobbles straight into the fog. Immediately, her body is seized by wild contortions and she falls to the ground in a horrible dance. I want to scream, but my throat is on fire. I take one futile step in her direction when I hear the cannon blast, know her heart has stopped, that she is dead.

I guess Finnick screaming for Mags is more cinematic. But I like this version better. You can see a shared understanding between them. I imagine that Finnick's dearest hope was to get Mags to the rescue point. But they both knew she might not make it. He starts to cry and apologizes. She kisses him, saying it's okay (she must know the revolution has to happen if he is to be freed from sexual slavery) and then just goes. And I know she sacrificed hersel for everyone. Katniss, Peeta, the country. But I also think she did it for him. Her boy. So that's why I don't like him screaming after her. [I also have a headcanon that she kisses him on the lips because he won't let the "clients" kiss him on the lips because they don't love him. And she's saying that she does.]

And I kind of heart Katniss for instinctively going after her.

And I'm glad for Mags' sake that it wasn't the monkeys or the beast or another wedge, where she might have suffered longer.

[hospitalterrorizer]

diary127

1/19/2024

friday

even though i am not yet hired, i am feeling like i am only free 'for now'.

crazy how work, even the potentiality of it, divides up your life/ makes me feel like my life is being divided up, and that i possess less of it.

anyway i did 4 songs today, one of them was one i went back to, to brighten up one of the synths, and then the others were ones i've been meaning to get to. i think they all sound good, they're all pretty minimal re: fixing or whatever, just a lot of what feels like tightening, getting stuff a little sharper, getting some stuff louder.

now i am just listening to this:

makes me want to write more fucked up fast stuff again soon. i do have room for that still i'm pretty sure in the record so we'll see. writing riffs is fun and i miss it. maybe when i'm at this job i'll think about that more or something.

i wonder if i'll even be listening to music on my way to work, i don't want to take my psp with me and stuff, it'd be too much, and my phone has such little space it's so fucking annoying.

i also did read a chapter of wiseblood today, really nice to have the book around while i am just exporting stuff and waiting around.

i just listened to a bunch of the stuff i have randomly and i'm liking basically all of it. a common issue is the guitar synth things overpower a lot of stuff, so i can probably just drop them by like 1-2 db when necessary, and then maybe add some filtering to basses so they move out of the way of guitars more a bit. also i need the vox to be a touch louder, mostly.

here are some cute outfits i found from that one forum where people posted mag scanz:

spur:

the other half of that image is not anywhere, it seems like, but it's way cute, she's hanging out on a bunch of marshall amps, the katakana says "rock". very fun. imo.

fruits:

i really love the 2nd one, the like, dead animal makes it so weird/fucked, to me, i don't think we see that a lot, and it's probably okay if it's thrifted. idk. i guess the fact it intones some kind of cruelty/something offputting in an otherwise cute outfit is interesting + you don't see offputting as something fashion tries to be. she's probably not trying but something is. the bag too, it's so weird, in a good way, it feels like a real collision of things, the boots and helmet, it's a cool disaster.

and then more powerviolence:

these guys have kinda basic riffs but that makes picking them apart fun/easier, been a while since i've listened in that way, but it's also pretty good broadly, idk, it's imaginative in other sorts of ways, maybe i am just thinking too much about writing a 12 second long song or something, i wanna fuck around on my guitar again, just do stupid slide riffs where the shapes don't change at all, and then figure out fun synth bits.

otherwise right now i'm tired and maybe i should just get ready to sleep now, i'll post the postcard thingies tomorrow, i promise, honest, really, and maybe say more, but also maybe i'll get a lot of mixing done tomorrow, i hope i do. anyway

byebye!!!!!!!!!