#i love you ikea packaging paper

[grimcygnet]

walllll thingyyyy

[all-hallows-street]

Guess whose financial mistake arrived early...

I will give more in depth looks later (I have to work to afford such questionable purchases), but a quick individual review of what I got:

Neil Demon Plushy

Not a plush toys collector at all; my closest reference is the IKEA shark. He is heavier than he looks, very sturdy (?) if that makes sense. Doesn't seem like he will deform any time soon. The details are adorable and I don't see any glaring defects.

All Saints Street Hoodie

Surprisingly large for me. I was worried they only had one size made for the Chinese market. I'm 1.7m (5 foot 7) tall for reference and this is still a bit too big for me. Will likely get too small for anyone over 6 feet tall. The quality is good! Very soft. Velvet interior. I don't know much about shirt stamping, but since it's not in the fabric I'm guessing the stamp might start to crack after multiple washes.

All Saints Street Vol. 1-3 Collection

Now this is something I can talk about more. The sleeve was unfortunately damaged in shipping and the books have very minor damage in the spine and vol 2 has a minor case of dog ears. The quality of the paper is great! It is color paper, not glossy one you see in comic book issues, but it's thicker than the black and white you see in manga. Would still make sure to have a dehumidifier if your storing place is not dry. I've already experienced book wrapping and it's painful.

Each volume contains around 80 chapters with one extra chapter not on bilibili. They also contain a message from Lingzi and WSJ's editor, plus all character bios even for ones we never got one (Enrique, Eduardo ans Anthony). And if a Weibo post is correct some might have been updated from the ones online (Axel grew 1 cm in the book bio).

Of course later I'll look over everything to see if there are any significan changes to make a note of. Also it came with this lol.

I have the Alice in Wonderland art somewhere, I'll post it later as well.

All Saints Street Anniversary Playing Cards

The playing card decks from the 6th and the 7th anniversary. As you can see I haven't opened the 7th, but I got the 6th a while ago on AliExpress so I expect them to be similar.

This is something else I can review more in depth, coming from a family that loves playing poker. The quality of the prints is beautiful, however I keep them in the box all the time because the quality of the cards itself is not good!

The cards feel like store bought cardboard; good playing cards are made out of cardboard, but this deck doesn't have the same treatment. They are so fragile, even by just handling them to get the face cards I've already made slight damage to the edges. I wouldn't play any game with them, much less shuffle them. I don't even want to imagine how much they will bend. Also the Crystal card came with damage (the small white spot on the edge) from the store. Pain.

Anyways. I'll frame the face cards because they are so pretty and I want to keep them in the best condition... I don't know what I will do with the rest of the 36 cards. Maybe practice magic tricks? Lol. Before all this I've been working on how to scan all the face cards and post them, but it's been more difficult than expected. If you have ever tried to digitize prints you will know. Once I have them, I'll post them alongside high quality scans.

When it comes to my review of PandaBuy... On one hand it was an excellent service and experience. On the other... I don't even want to reveal how much the shipping was. I wouldn't recommend anyone else do it unless you are stupid with your money (like me), even then

I would advice to do your own research. PandaBuy and all agents to buy from China are definitely better when you buy in bulk. My package was 'only' 2kg. Many people buy over 10kg to make it worth it. I'm already committed so if new volumes come out I will buy them, and maybe also get counterfeit Gucci shoes or something since that's what most people use this agents for...

That's all for now. Feel free to reply or send any questions you have.

[flower-zombie-rob]

late night’s are for sleeping

Another little irissona fic because I literally cannot help myself they're so fun to write as little snippets and tidbits. Hope you enjoy! This one is, once again, featuring @geekyfox2‘s character, the iris employee Geeky. This is another super wholesome one so no trigger warnings or anything like that, just cute, fluffy character interactions. Enjoy and feel free to ask any questions about the character, I’d love to talk about them more!

The twilight moon shone through the window of R’s room in the dead of night. R called it a room, in its basic form it was more of a cell, but that didn’t matter all that much when it was decorated like a room. How the iris employees had lugged soft, ikea furniture through the doors of the security-tight facility was still a mystery to them. Nonetheless, the hour on the clock was long past midnight, which sprung a surprise for R as they were tentatively listening the the quiet hums of computer fans and the gently putter-pattering of laptop keys from a room somewhere along the hallway. Someone was hard at work, an odd occurrence down this end of the facility at this late hour. The only ones usually required to be down here this late are security guards, and they're not needed half the time either, being suspended on R’s good behavioural record for an ALTR in containment. They wondered who it could be, sitting in one of the occupied office rooms, slaving away at a desk while the moon was high. After a while of sleepless speculation, the energised ALTR realised they were far too curious to fall asleep contently. 

They stood up and rustled around in their cupboard for the emergency access card they’d been given, in case they desperately needed something or injured themselves while no one was around. They scanned the card at the door lock and watched as it chirped. There was a subtly click and the door slid open with a gentle push. R peeped their head around the gap in the door, taking their first step into the unknown darkness of the hallway without their rooms subtle highlight bathing the walls in purple. They shuffled nervously past the doors to their left and caught sight of a blue light emanating from the underneath of an office employee door. They sped up, tip-toeing towards the door and pending it tantalisingly slowly, worried of the prospect of getting into worlds of trouble.

Takeaway food packaging lined the eft side of the desk, post-it-notes littered around the computer so that the border of the glowing screen was barely visible anymore. Scrunched-up paper notes and pens were scattered haphazardly over the sleek white tiles of the office and the typing of the keys felt more fatigued from up close. Geeky sat, clearly oblivious of the time or simply ignorant to it, typing away at what must have been some overdue work, scratching at the walls to Finnish a deadline she was desperate to reach. Her glasses messily sliding down her face and hear hair messy, she didn’t even notice the young ALTR saunter in, still fulling engaging her tired attention on the unfinished work. She’d pulled an all-nighter, as the rest of the employees R knew had told them about. Apparently Geeky was notorious for working herself into exhaustion and burnout, as R was now observing. They were the only two who seemed awake this side of the facility, the only two creating noise of any sort. R decided to pipe up in friendly concern.

“Geeky?”

R let out a shriek as they were attacked in a flash by a very clearly startled Geeky, having a taser threaten them a little too close for comfort. The moment the scientist observed who it was, though, she quickly disarmed herself and adjusted her glasses.

“Jesus, R, you scared the life out of me!” She said, putting the taser ack in her lab coat pocket.

“Sorry… why you awake?” R asked, shuffling closer.

“I could ask you the same thing,” she stood as she spoke. “You should be tucked into bed, you have a medical check tomorrow.”

“Was worried about you.” The murmured, tugging on the scientists sleeve.

“I’m fine, just catching up on work. Come with me we’ll get you back to bed. Don’t be using that card to come and check on me, it’s for emergencies only.”

She held the ALTR’s hand and took them back to their room, sitting them on their comfortable bed. As Geeky went to leave, she felt something grasping her am, pulling her back towards the bed with unexpected strength for an ALTR so weak-looking. She found herself looking down at R on the bed, holding onto her arm with a firm grip.

“Stay.”

She let out a small sigh, trying to hide a slight annoyance.

“Why, R?”

“Can’t sleep.”

“You need sleep, R.”

“So do you!”

“I’m working, sweetie.”

“But late nights are for sleeping.”

She was shocked to be suddenly yanked down, falling unceremoniously backwards onto R’s bed(which he had to admit was kind of the exact comfortable bed she needed right now with her burnout). She scrambled to sit up normally, not wanting to risk the clumsy ALTR falling off the bed while trying to stop her from standing. She gave up and laid down.

“There, happy?”

R dunked themselves down beside her, hugging her and pulling the covers over the too. They gave a happy nod and snuggled up to the employee in, what Geeky inferred, was another way to keep her from getting back to her work. She gave up fighting against the ALTR and just let herself chill out for the first time in days.

“I’ll get up in a minute and go back to work, I just need to know you get to sleep.” She yawned.

R hummed in response and cursed their little body tighter towards the. Scientist for warmth, the scientist who was currently stuck in the most comfortable place she’d been in weeks. She decided, if not for a vert long time, she’d just tale a quick nap. I mean, she thought to herself, whats the point of inefficiently staying awake to wait for R to settle for the night when I could get re-energised to finish the rest of the work?

“I’m only sleeping for a minute, okay?”

“M’kay.” Replied R, closing their eyes and settling into a long night of making sure their friend got a good night of sleep. And as much as Geeky would object to R’s interference with her busy work schedule, deep down, she’d be quite happy with R finally making sure she took care of herself, even if it was just for one night. And, well, just as R told them earlier… late nights are for sleeping. They both closed their eyes and drifted off.

Thanks so much for reading if you made t this far! I had a random blast if inspiration and I wanted to even further develop the relationship between R and Geeky because I think as a duo, also from my last irissona fic, they make a very sweet pair of friends. Something about the workaholic scientist and the carefree  baby boi(tm) makes my writing urges go brrrrr. Anyway, check out the rest of the irissona group on blogs like @glass-trash-bab @intothebutterflyburrow @bondedostae @ratwhowrites and more(there’s so many of you i need a list somewhere of which ones have interacted with R and which ones haven’t to be honest).

[somediyprojects]

DIY Inkjet Transfer Table Settings

Project by Kate Pruitt:

for my third textile upgrade project, i drew inspiration from the work of lisa stickley. her vintage china tablecloth is truly gorgeous and i love how she employs photorealism in her work. i wanted to do the same, so i used a simple inkjet printer transfer paper for these and i was amazed with the results. transfer paper has come a long way in the past few years. gone are the days of glossy, rubbery images; these transfers are crisp and clean and completely flexible and soft on the fabric. you can do so many variations on the images for these linens: botanicals, figurines, vegetables, plates of your favorite foods, cooking utensils, tchotskies, etc. i recommend printing everything at life size to compliment the realist look. get your camera and go to the grocery store! have fun! –kate pruitt

materials:

1. photos of food, dishes, figurines, plates, etc. (anything you want, make sure it high resolution) 2. scissors 3. inkjet printer transfer paper 4. inkjet color printer 5. napkins and placemats (mine are from ikea and cost less than a dollar each) 6. iron 7. computer

instructions:

1. if you don’t want to take the photographs of objects yourself, you can find some great images in food magazines, or cookbook images, or just search flickr for yummy food photos. upload your photos to your computer and play around with them to get them to be the size you want. make a couple black and white prints on 8.5 x 11 paper to check that you like the size and detail on your photos. you want your images to be something you can cut all the way around to have a freestanding object. the transfers print in reverse so if that matters to your object, you need to reverse the image on your computer before printing.

2. when you have the images ready at the size you want them to be, print them in color on your transfer paper according to the directions on the package of the transfer paper. if you have the option on your printer, you should choose the highest quality of printing.

3. allow the transfer prints to dry. meanwhile, iron all the wrinkle out of your placemats and napkins on high temperature with no steam. allow these to cool.

4. cut out your shapes with scissors. you want to cut all excess off your shapes and cut right up to the edge of you object.

5. lay the transfer paper down on the fabric and iron it down according to the transfer paper instructions.

6. continue following the transfer instructions for cooling, peeling off the backing, and setting the image.

VOILA!

[knuckles-apr]

Random Ging x Reader Headcanons

**NSFW warning. It’s tame, but still**

 +++ Say what you will about his hygiene, but Ging has the straightest teeth of anyone you've ever seen, and he never even had braces. He doesn’t take great care of them or anything, but he’s won the genetic lottery on this one 

+++ He keeps on trying to get pet fish, but always forgets to feed them, so they die. Sometimes, he’ll even throw away or donate the tank, only to a few months later, get back into the scene with new beta fish. He’s even accidentally named two different fish Puddles, but the hell if you’re saying anything about it 

+++ Animals do love him, but the only ones that can keep his attention are the ones that are dangerous. You frequently come home to a massive pile of shit on your front porch, and a popped blood vessel when you discover that he’s taken the bison inside. 

“What? Oh, don’t worry, I signed for your package. You should be nicer to me if you want me to keep on doing these kinds of favors for you” 

“Ging, there’s more than just my package on the front porch.” 

“...is this some kind of innuendo? I’m not following”

+++ For such a shy and independent man, Ging sure has a lot of friends. Most of whom he’s met while hunting, and almost all of whom are unsavory. He does have the decency to keep them in the garage, though, whenever they visit. And you make sure to keep the fridge out there stocked with beer so that there’s no reason Ging would need to come inside to get more while they’re around. Your memories are still haunted by the image of the garage door swinging open, revealing a poker table full of men with varying degrees of nakedness and drunkenness. 

“Hey, we ran out of peanut M&Ms.” 

“Ging! Shut the door, what the hell?!” 

“Oh, come on, he has a condition! He’s not into you, I swear” 

Even Ging, who was the most clothed, wasn’t leaving much to the imagination

+++ Poor Kite is cancelled on by Ging frequently. Although it seems like maybe an unspoken declaration of disinterest in the friendship, what it really boils down to it that that’s just the way Ging is; Kite is the only friend he has that’s close enough to be making plans with him, or else we would see that he would do the same to everyone in his friend pool

+++ As a result, whenever they make plans, Kite texts you just to let you know, because you both know he’s going to forget or try to weasel his way out of it the day of. 

“Ging, wake up, you and Kite are going to Oktoberfest today” 

“Mmmmm, tell him I’m sick” 

“Tell him yourself, he’s right here”

+++ Before you moved in, Ging exclusively slept on a beanbag, despite having a perfectly comfortable bed. Even now, sometimes you’ll wake up to an empty bed, and go make breakfast, only to find Ging in the living room, asleep on his beanbag and covered in goldfish crumbs

+++ This man legit still comes into a sock when jerking off. Stepping on a crispy sock every once in a while is just part of living with Ging. But that doesn’t mean you don’t yell at him every time it happens.

 “Come on, I left it in the corner of the room! It’s on you this time, I don’t care what you say”

+++ He carries everything in plastic bags. He’s never once invested in luggage or portable storage of any kind

+++ Ging loves gaming, but his taste is a little juvenile (if you can believe it). He is an avid X-Box fan, and will fight tooth and nail for it. He has an X-Box live membership and a gaming headset, and several online friends to play Call of Duty with at any given time. If you ever wonder where your cousin picked up all the swear words he’s been using, look no further than Ging

+++ Back when it was a thing, he bought gamer girl bathwater claiming it was a joke. Then why is it in your glass display case, Ging?

+++ Along with the gamer girl bathwater, Ging has collected many relics from the past; both from his hunting adventures, and his fleeting interests. Even though he isn’t a necessarily a sentimental or materialistic man, he does tend to keep some things around. But his habit of travelling light mixed with his abysmal taste makes it so that the things he keeps are usually ratty pieces of paper, small rocks and twigs, or in the rare case, a newspaper or magazine clipping

+++ Speaking of his abysmal taste, don’t let him find out about Ikea. Or HGTV. Or The Sims. Basically anything that would have him get interested in decoration. Before you came along, the man didn’t know he needed a shower curtain, and his mattress was just on the floor 

+++ And should we talk about his slight of hand magic phase? No, not this time. Wait, yes. He was really bad at it. Now if you talk about it he’ll give you the silent treatment for a couple of hours. Honestly, the real magic is getting him off your case for a little while

[namariea]

Devil’s Advocate | I

“So for argument’s sake... let’s just say Do Kyungsoo really is the boring square you say he is..” 

“Don’t you want to find out what makes him tick?”

Pairing: Kyungsoo x Reader

Words: 4.4k

Genre: Romance, Slowburn, Smut

It started with a knock on your door.

“Jongin is coming over tonight, that cool?”

Looking up from your laptop screen, you stared at your roommate who was leaning against your doorway. Blinking slowly, you processed her words.

“Jongin is coming over.”

“Yes, that’s what I just said.”

“And will Mr. Kim be staying over?”

“That would be a correct assumption, yes.”

“Sleeping in your room.”

“Why, did you want him to sleep here with you? Not what I was expecting, but I’m all down for polygamy.”

With a sigh, you saved the document you were working on and began to close your laptop. Collecting the various papers and books scattered around you, you began to tuck them away neatly into your backpack. Sliding off of the bed, you walked the length of the room and began to rifle through your drawers, pulling out some clothes.

Frowning, Jennie walked over to you and looked over your shoulder as you began refolding them and putting them in a gym bag.

“What are you doing?”

“I have a paper I need to finish proofing for tomorrow and I highly doubt I will get any work done with the two of you going at it like animals.”

Jennie didn’t even look fazed at the comment, shrugging non committedly while throwing some pajama shorts your way. Rolling your eyes you passed through the joined bathroom and threw in your toiletries. As you were zipping up your bag a knock came at the door causing you to pause.

Well, that was fast.

Turning around, you looked at the brunette behind you with raised eyebrows, and only then she had the decency to look the slightest bit sheepish.

“Have I told you how much I love you today?”

With your roommate trailing at your heels blabbering about how you are the greatest roommate ever and how she owes you a life debt, you opened the front door and were greeted with Jongin holding what appeared to be a party sized bucket of KFC. Before he could open his mouth you stuck out your hand, waiting.

Blinking down at your outstretched palm, he gave you a confused look.

“Keys. Since you are kicking me out of my bed I’m taking yours”

Jennie snorted behind you as Jongin’s face split into a wide grin.

“You know, I always knew you were a great person.” fishing out his keys from his pocket he handed them to you.

Slinging your bag over your shoulder, you gave the couple a wave of your hand and began to make your way down the hall. You were halfway to the elevators when Jongin's loud voice stopped you.

“Oh by the way, Kyungsoo isn’t around tonight, so feel free to raid the fridge before he gets back.”

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Jongin’s presence at your apartment wasn’t a new occurrence.

In the beginning, it was just him coming over during the day to help Jennie with her design assignments. Which was ok, amazing actually, since it helped her out a lot and saved you dealing with her stress meltdowns.

Then it progressed to Jongin appearing at your dinner table every Friday to partake in Chinese takeout nights. Which was fine, again, since he picked it up on his way over and pitched in. He also somehow was able to sweet talk the old woman who owned the store and managed to get extra egg rolls. Can’t go wrong with that.

It wasn’t until Jennie gave you the look while the older boy excused himself to use the bathroom after one said dinner that you took the hint.

Now, Jongin occasionally stays over during the weekends, where you would find him in the living room at ungodly hours watching the Pirates of the Carribean all the while eating a family sized package of oreo’s. Which was mildly perturbing on two counts. First, was the fact that this was probably the 5th time you’ve seen him watch that movie, and second, those were your oreos.

The final straw was not until the weekend that just past where you were woken up a loud banging. It was not until you were  halfway to Jennie’s door in a frantic scramble that your sleep deprived brain caught up with you and realized it was very much not a violent murder taking place in the room over.

Animals.

It was then you all agreed to establish some sort of door-sock system.

Which in essence was - if Jongin was coming over, it was probably best to just find somewhere else to crash.

You didn’t actually mind leaving as much as you thought you would. Jennie was one of your closests friends and it was clear as day that Jongin made her happy. You didn’t even mind hanging out with the guy, he was fun and always brought snacks in return for practically living at your place. Even if his tastes in movies were highly questionable.

It was just sometimes - like right now where you had a Business Ethics paper due at 7AM - where you needed all the quiet you could get.

Reaching the apartment, you slotted the key into the lock, you pushed open the door to Jongin and Kyungsoo’s apartment. Stepping through the threshold you were greeted by darkness.

Flicking on the lights you took in the apartment. You had been in the apartment a handful of times when Chanyeol threw parties, but this was the first time you had been there on your own, literally.

From the neatly organized coffee table to the dust-less surfaces as far as the eye can see, the state of the apartment very much reflected that of the other owner - there was no way anyone would believe the human tornado that was Kim Jongin lived here otherwise.

Speaking of the other owner -

“Kyungsoo?”

Thank goodness for small mercies.

Do Kyungsoo, best friend of Jongin and probably the biggest enigma you've ever met. Not only was he more reserved and mild tempered in comparison to his flatmate, but he was the only one in your mutual friend group that you couldn’t bring yourself to get close to.

It wasn’t for a lack of trying, mind you. And to Kyungsoo’s credit he has never been rude to you, though you wouldn’t necessarily call it friendly either. Cordial at best...maybe. His deposition towards you, and apparently anyone who didn’t know him before the year 2015 was polite but distant. He was so different from the rest of his friends that one day Jennie had asked Jongin how he and Kyungsoo even lived together.

“We met freshman year-”  Jongin said while spooning a mountain of orange chicken onto his plate.

“We were paired up as roommates and we just clicked - Kyungsoo is a great guy, he’s actually pretty hilarious”

“Really?” Jennie leaned in, abandoning her lo mein to gape at the man next to her.

“Its true!” Jongin said defensively at her expression, “how do I explain it-"

"You kind of have to approach him first, and then see how he responds. He just needs time to warm up to you, you'll see."

Now, you weren’t sure if Kyungsoo had ‘warmed up to you’ yet, but you definitely saw the man’s look of disgust as he caught you making kraft dinner in the microwave that one time during finals last semester.

Hot tip - never make microwave kraft dinner in front of a Culinary Arts major.

Checking your watch and noting it was half past ten, you settled down cross-legged at the coffee table in the living room. Pulling out your laptop and notes, you organized it all in front of you before rolling your neck and flexing your fingers.

“Now, where was I-”

After what seems like the hundredth time going over the same words over and over again, desperately making sure you didn’t have any spelling mistakes and that your citations were all correct, you finally hit save for the last time. Tapping the screen of your phone you brought it up to your face as you leant back against the couch, squinting as the time appeared.

2:35 AM

Stretching, you lifted yourself from your sitting position and began packing your laptop and papers away.

Exhausted, you crawled your way up onto the couch, pulled the Captain America themed throw blanket over your tired body, and closed your eyes, waiting for sleep to take you.

Which should have been an easy task.

Except Jongin apparently decided to buy the cheapest couch in Ikea.

No wonder the man lived on your sofa, he has never known true comfort.

Huffing, you sat up begrudgingly, groaning as your body objected to the movement. You glanced down the darkened hallway and pursed your lips.

Taking your bags you began shuffling down the hallway and stopped in front of one of the doors that was ajar. Slowly pushing it open you hesitantly stuck your head in. The sight of the various Mangas scattered on the floor confirmed that you had found the right bedroom.

I mean, there are worse places to sleep.

Making your way further into the room, you kicked the door closed as you made quick work of stripping out of your clothes and changing into your pajamas. You all but dove into the bed, not caring that it was unmade or that you probably should have changed the sheets. A content sigh escaped you as you sank into the mattress, sleep taking over.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Waking with a start, you were momentarily disoriented as you took in your surroundings. Blinking blearily around, it took a few seconds to remember where you were and why your bed smelled like Old Spice.

Ah, right.

Groaning, you glanced at the window and took in the darkness still.

You tried to close your eyes in hopes that you would be able to catch a few more minutes of sleep. However, instead of slipping into blissful sleep you found yourself tossing and turning, body restless in any position you put it in.

Pressing the heels of your palms into your eyes you lay there for a few moments. Blindly reaching towards the side table you fumbled with your phone, squinting as the screen illuminated your vision.

5:50 am

There is no God.

Finally accepting that you were not going to get any more sleep, you begrudgingly slid out of bed. Stretching, you began to make your way to the door, stifling a yawn as you opened it.

And immediately screamed.

“WHAT THE F- Kyungsoo?”

Standing in front of you was a hooded figure, looking just as startled as you were. Hand grasping the handle leading to the room directly across the hall, Kyungsoo had turned at the sound of Jongin’s door opening and his eyes widened almost comically at your presence.

As the fuzziness of sleep was lifted you realized that it must have been the sound Kyungsoo entering the apartment that woke you up. And judging from the incredulous look he was giving you, Jongin must not have told him you were there. Taking in his baseball cap and casual attire, you felt your eyebrows furrow.

Did he just get back?

You watched as his eyes slid down and you were suddenly very much aware of the lopsided bun that had come half undone in your sleep and the thin material of your pajamas. His eyes then darted from your own to the bedroom and back, eyebrows furrowing.

Your eyes widened at the silent question glinting in those dark eyes. Your hands immediately flew up as you began sputtering.

“It's not what it looks like!“ you began frantically and he only lifted a dark brow higher in a silent bid for you to continue. “Jongin was staying over at our place last night and I came here to give them privacy, you know how they are, it’s like National Geographic except nobody asked for it”

He shot you a bemused look.

You felt yourself flush and looked at the space of the wall next to his head “And well, I didn't get kicked out of my own bed to sleep on a couch… So I slept... in here" gesturing to the bedroom behind you awkwardly.

There was another beat of silence.

Great. Fantastic. Realll smooth. It seemed that without fail, every time you are in the immediate presence of the man across from you, you feel yourself suddenly tense up. Which is stupid, considering the fact that you are friends (distant acquaintances), and have been around each other for months now and got along great (cordial at best), surely by now you can have a normal conversation at the very least.

Speaking of conversation, you also become hyperaware of the fact that the other person in the hallway has yet to say a single word to you. Palms beginning to sweat, you began to scramble to think of something - anything - to cut the silence. As if your insane ramblings weren’t bad enough. He probably thinks you’re even more of a raging lunatic, compounded with what happened last semester. Why, why, of all things why did you have to crave Kraft Dinner for fucks sake-

“I see.”

Your inner monologue was cut short by a low reply. it seemed Kyungsoo deemed your answer acceptable, nodding slowly to himself.

You almost felt your body sag in relief, shifting your weight on the balls of your feet.

As another beat of silence passed, you fidgeted again as you were regarded by the dark haired man. Kyungsoo had yet to make any move towards his own room and you suddenly didn’t know what to do with your hands.

Someone kill me.

You cleared your throat, “Umm...so now that that's cleared up… I’m just going to... go over...there” gesturing to the bathroom. You didn’t even wait for him to answer you as you powered your way past him and slipped into the bathroom, pressing your back against the door as it closed behind you.

You waited with baited breath as you heard silence from the hallway. Eventually after what felt like an eternity, there was a shuffling of feet, and the clicking of a door closing from down the hall.

Silently making the motion of bashing your head against the door, you let out a deep breath. Shaking your head you flicked on the light and picked up Jongin’s papaya face wash.

I mean, that could have been worse.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Making your way across campus, you faltered slightly as a yawn made its way through you. After submitting your paper to your professor's dropbox you had spent the day catching up on the never ending tasks you had on your to-do list. You had holed yourself up at the campus library and it wasn’t until your stomach decided to do its best impression of a Harley Davidson that you decided it was probably best to call it a day.

Pulling out your phone you pulled out a delivery app and started browsing the menu for the greek place a block down from your apartment. Flicking through the menu, you contemplated between the Pork Souvlaki or the Chicken gyro...maybe Jennie would be willing to go half and ha-.

You halted on the sidewalk.

Right.

Jennie.

Jennie who is currently still at your apartment.

With Jongin.

Well, shit.

Switching to your messages you sent a text to Jennie.

You: All clear?

You watched with bated breath as the three dots appeared at the bottom.

A sock emoji.

Lovely.

Sitting down at a nearby bench, you began sending out a barrage of texts.

After about 20 minutes of asking around you found out that Jisoo was out of town seeing her parents, Rose’s apartment building was apparently being fumigated for the second time this month and Seulgi was having Irene and Wendy over and you didn’t think you wanted to be part of whatever freaky party those three were going to have.

With every text that came in you felt yourself slowly deflate more and more. Placing your hand in your jacket, you grasped the keys that were in your pocket. They felt heavier than they should be.

There was one other option.

Grimacing, you flushed as you remembered the painfully awkward conversation you exchanged with a particular dark haired man this morning. There was no doubt in your mind that he would be home if you went over now, and you didn’t even want to begin imagining how this interaction will go.

You bit down on your bottom lip in worry as you brain tried playing out the various scenarios in your head. All in all, Kyungsoo didn’t seem to care all that much this morning, but then again when have you ever seen Kyungsoo care about anything.

Come on, think. Well, what do we know...

He is a mutual friend (questionable), for starters. If you both are able to get along with the dumperfire that is your friend group you have to have something in common.. Right?

You stopped fiddling with the keys in your pocket as the realization hit you.

Pulling up your contacts you scanned down the list before pressing ‘call’.

“Oi, Jongin. Does Kyungsoo like Greek?”

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Turns out no, Kyungsoo does not, in fact, like Greek.

According to Jongin, Kyungsoo is obsessed with this weird hole-in-the-wall Italian place that had handmade pasta. What was supposed to be a 10 minute walk ended up taking 45 minutes as you got lost 3 times, and once you finally found the store the doors were locked. What restaurant shuts down from 3 to 5 on a Friday?

Hipster pasta makers, apparently.

It was lost to you what the appeal was, but if there was anything that you learned in the years as a young adult living on their own, it was that there were two sure-fire ways to bond with someone:

Get drunk

Eat good food while drunk

The latter was not necessarily limited to ‘good’ food - after a few shots to you a McNugget is like a Michelen meal. However you had a gut feeling that Kyungsoo wouldn’t be too welcoming if you showed up with tacos and tequila.

So did you wait around for an hour and a half just to order something you could have bought as Lean Cuisine?

You bet your ass you did.

Because nothing says I’m sorry I know we barely know each other but our friends are banging so were kind of stuck together quite like overpriced spaghetti and meatballs.

Adjusting the paper bag in your arms you walked up to the familiar door. Fumbling with the key you finally managed to wedge it open and stepped through the threshold.

Unlike the last time you entered the apartment, this time you weren’t met with silence. The lights were already on and the sound of the TV filtered throughout the apartment. Toeing off your shoes and arranging them neatly next to the pair by the door.

Arms full of take out you were all of a sudden nervous to turn the corner.

You are once again reminded of the fact that you are very much not close with this man and this will probably be the first time you ever said more than 4 sentences to him in one sitting. And now you are about to have dinner together, alone.

"You kind of have to approach him first, and then see how he responds. He just needs time to warm up to you, you'll see"

Kim Jongin don’t you fail me now.  

Kyungsoo was sitting on the couch looking at his phone when you entered the living room. He immediately looked up and you watched his eyes widen marginally at your presence, clearly not expecting you back.

“I…” The mini speech you had been preparing during the 12 minute walk to the apartment died in your throat as you made eye contact with the dark haired man in front of you. The look he gave you left you momentarily thrown, it was a look that instantly made you think that he was annoyed with you with the way his eyebrows were drawn and the slight frown tugging at the corners of his mouth.

It wasn’t until you saw Kyungsoo’s eyes slide to the bag in your arms briefly, and the slightest flicker of curiosity gave you the courage to push on.

“Jongin is still my place,” you offered, and watched as his eyes flit back to meet your own.

“So,” you continued, shifting the bag in your arms, “I brought some dinner, as a peace offering of sorts, I guess. I hope you’re hungry, because they gave us enough garlic bread to feed a small Italian village.” you let out an awkward laugh.

Kyungsoo looked at you as if you had grown a second head. You didn’t blame him, but you were too far gone to back down now, even if the man was giving you a shoulder so cold it could freeze Sahara.

Making your way into the kitchen you placed the bag on the counter and began taking plates out of the cabinets, trying to keep your trembling hands busy.

Stupid, stupid, this whole idea was stupid.

As you were transferring the food from the containers you heard a slight rustling behind you.

You almost turned around when you didn’t hear anything else, but then a deep voice spoke up, albeit hesitantly.

“Is that from Giulietta’s?”

Stiffening a smile you did not respond to the man immediately when he materialized at your side.

Humming in affirmation you handed him his plate, which he took slowly, eyeing the food suspiciously.

I swear, this guy.

It wasn’t until you had dished out your own plate that you turned to him finally and gave him what you hoped was a friendly smile.

“So, have you watched the new season of Great British Bakeoff?”

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

“Have a nice weekend? Actually don’t answer that, I really don’t want to know.” You didn’t even look up from your laptop as Jennie slid into the seat next to you at your morning lecture.

“Jongin has been doing ballet for years, I swear I never knew a body could bend like-”

“Ew. Gross Jennie, it’s 9AM”

“I have no concept of time anymore, the man wouldn’t let me sleep-”

“Jennifer, please, this is a sacred place.”

“This is Introduction to Environmental Science, most of the people here are too worried about cleaning baby ducks with Dawn soap than to eavesdrop”

Groaning you buried your head in your hands and took a deep breath. You really should have stopped by the Cafe next door and got some coffee, you aren’t nearly coherent enough to deal with this.

“Hey,” Jennie started, pulling you from your thoughts.

“Thanks again for stepping out and giving us the apartment for the weekend, I really appreciate it”

“You’re lucky I like you.

“Oh please-”

“-I barely got out of there alive.”

“Come on, it couldn’t have been that bad.”

It wasn’t, actually.

Last night you and Kyungoo had sat in their living room and watched the Great British Bakeoff while you ate your dinner. You thanked whatever higher power there was that Kyungsoo was not a stickler for eating at the dinner table. Or maybe he was, but also thought this situation was incredibly awkward and also wanted some sort of distraction to avoid having to make small talk.

It wasn’t wholly unpleasant, you actually found yourself mildly enjoying yourself. He was a man of a few words but every now and again he would sprinkle in some choice commentary here and there, making noncommittal noises when a contestant added a new ingredient.

Odd fellow, this one.

He was polite enough to stick around for a couple of episodes before standing and offering to take your plate.

“Would you like something else? Jongin keeps ice cream sandwiches in the fridge”

“Oh...no, I’m ok thanks”

You were absolutely going to have one later.

Giving a curt nod, he walked back to the kitchen to wash the dishes. After a few minutes he returned to the living room, shifting uneasily on his feet. He had this thoughtful, intense expression, almost searching. For what, you had no idea but it made you fidget nonetheless, breaking eye contact and pick at imaginary lint on your sweater.

You were about to make some excuse about needing to go back to the library - because you sure as hell weren’t going to stick around here -  when he mumbled something about having papers to grade before disappearing down the hall to his room without another word.

A few more moments passed before you let out the breath you didn’t realize you were holding.

Well, that’s that I guess.

“It went fine. He was...nice”

“Nice.”

“As nice as you can be with a stranger invading your space unnanounced.”

“So dramatic, it’s not like you two are strangers.”

“I don’t even think he knows my name.”  

“We have all hung out loads of times before-”

“I have spoken to him more in the last 12 hours than I have in the last 12 months”

“And who’s fault is that? If anything, that's progress, you should be thanking me. Kyungsoo’s a hoot”

You leveled her with a look.

“...have I told you how much I love you today?”

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

A/N: Had this in my drafts for over 2 years. Hoping by posting I’ll be motivated to actually finish it~

[oaimniynaug]

❤️

August 15, 2021 I love this journal, because in my last entry I was anxious about not securing a job, and yet a few days following that I received and accepted an offer from Denver. The journal captures, in a stream-of-consciousness-manner, how I felt at those moments. And thus when I read entries in retrospect I get the best sense of how I was feeling and/or making sense of events. This week, since we returned from Kansas City on Wednesday, I don't think I've had such a rotten stretch of four days in a long time (which I recognise as a privileged thing to say, in the context of an ongoing pandemic). First, my visa approval notice or receipt is still not in the mail (BUT, mail delays are to be expected, and the cheque has been cashed). Second, survey collection has been very, very slow. It's been more than a month and the survey firm has collected 10 dyads out of 250. 10! And on the call they claimed to have 20. Either way, it's a long way away (BUT, it's not the end and the firm recognises we've not hit that critical mass, and I can be more hands-on with the process). Third, and relatedly, because I haven't been able to get a large-enough sample, my current dissertation draft is subpar and I knew it when I turned it in. I am not ready to defend and I got a harsh but accurate email from my advisor telling me so, who also offered to meet over the weekend (BUT, it is highly likely that I can start work without the PhD, and actually give myself more time to complete the analysis and to write something better). Finally, to cap it all off, we were supposed to fly to Denver on Tuesday, on the premise that the IKEA delivery would be complete on Monday. It looks like the order is not only rescheduled/delayed, but the package - which is already on its way - can only be delivered two weeks later. And even so I have no trust that it will be fulfilled properly (BUT, we are a little weary of travelling + going to Denver late doesn't affect most plans + we will still spend the same amount of time together). Also, in spite of all these developments, we hosted two groups of friends and I still managed to get things done, even if I have done no susbtantive work or had any meaningful things completed. * Talking to my advisor was very helpful. I cried a little so that was cathartic. Martin has been a pillar throughout. And today Melanie's texts were exactly what I needed, and I wanted to reproduce them here: 1. So it’s totally doable to do your post doc and finish your writing during that time 2. It’s hard. It’s really really hard. But you have to remember that you mostly finished a dissertation and got a job to start your career and got great grants and submitted papers all in 4 years! 3. You’ve done so much in that time! 4. A few extra months is nothing! It won’t set you back at all. And you’ll have three really great papers from it that will be ready to submit! Which people take their whole first year or two after they graduate anyway 5. Oh I get it! If it were me I’d be soooooo down too. I couldn’t work after not getting the grants for like two weeks cause I was like everyone hates my work it’s all over for me hahah it’s hard when we aren’t as perfect as we’d like to be or aren’t meeting the expectations we set for ourselves. But like you said this is something that is so normal in academia but as doc students we are treated like we are supposed to be perfect for whatever reason. It’s ridiculous. I think being at Denver is going to be a really great change of pace. I totally feel like it’s where you’re meant to be to just focus on what you like while working with great people.

[winterromanov]

“Am I your lockscreen?” “You weren’t supposed to see that.”

pairing - bucky x reader

When it comes to technology, Bucky is a literal grandpa. Admittedly, that’s not so hard to believe--as his Winter Soldier brainwashing is gradually replaced by sepia-toned, wartime memories, his mastery of complicated weapons and general ability for hacking seems to seep away with it--but even Steve handles a fucking iPhone better than he does. And Steve looks at CDs like they’re the work of the devil, preferring to skulk around dusty old record stores looking for fifty-year old vinyl in flimsy paper packages.

“Goddammit, why do you need an application for your wallet?” he grumbles, scrolling through his home screen with a reluctant index finger. “I have a wallet in real life. It holds dollars and dimes and everything.”

You roll your eyes at his attitude. With his sharp jawline and bright eyes, he has everyone fooled he’s not secretly ninety-years-old, but his voice sometimes totally gives it away. “Get with the times, Barnes. We have Apple Pay now.”

“Apple Pay is simply asking for thievery and identity fraud. The minute I start using contactless payments assume I’ve gone insane. Again.”

“Just admit it. You’re scared of technology.”

“Today Bruce showed me how to use a medical instrument that tells you in exact time how long a wound will take to heal,” he scoffs a laugh, “So I’m definitely not scared of technology, (Y/N).”

“Okay. Everyday technology, then.” You look over his shoulder, where he is trying to access his emails. His lockscreen is still a generic landscape background, snow-capped mountains and deep blue sky. “You’ve not even changed your wallpaper.”

“What? You can change that?”

You laugh, shaking your head. It’s like he’s not even trying. You kiss his cheek before taking his phone off him. “Here. Let me show you.”

-

A couple of weeks later you spot Bucky’s phone juddering across the granite of the kitchen island in his quarters of the Avengers complex. You look up from your laptop, watching as it gradually moves from the centre to the edges. Of course he has vibrate and a ringtone playing unnecessarily at the same time--he probably doesn’t know how to switch it off.

“Buck!” you yell out, knowing he’s trying to construct a flatpack wardrobe in the next room (he’d recently discovered the big IKEA and was adamant on doing some DIY). “Phone is ringing!”

You hear a muffled grunt. His voice is strangled. Probably holding a screwdriver between his teeth. “Probably Steve. Can you get it?”

Of course, you comply, but by the time you’ve clambered down from your barstool the phone has rung out. You might as well check if the caller has left a message. You press down the home button and to your surprise, your own face stares back at you.

You’re caught in the middle of laugh, hanging lazily off the edge of a garden chair on the lawn of Clint’s farmhouse. A daisy flower crown made with care by Lila Barton is threaded through your hair and a glass of white wine is clutched in your right hand. The sun begins to set behind you, the glow settling on your skin. You’re clearly a little tipsy. Tipsy enough, in fact, to not realise Bucky was actually using his phone camera without opening a dozen other applications first and accidentally creating a Facebook account for his left foot.

So. He’d changed his lockscreen after all.

“Who was it?” Bucky calls out, traipsing back through to the kitchen. His hair is a little messy and he’s stripped down to just his t-shirt. You grin at him teasingly, holding up his phone and the evidence you’d found.

“Am I your lockscreen?”

Bucky looks a little confused for a second, before realisation in hitting him in the form of slightly flushed cheeks. “I--you weren’t supposed to see that.”

“Of course I’m going to see it, dumbass.” You soften, your smile genuine. “You’re adorable.”

You hand him his phone back and he clutches your hand as you pass it over. “Well--I didn’t want some standard stock image of a view if I could choose my favourite one.”

His face is serious. You know. You know he never jokes about how much he loves you. Alongside is unconditional love for Steve, it’s the one real thing he knows.

You blink slowly, squeezing his fingers in your own. “You’re my favourite view, too.”

send me a request

[justthehiddleswrites]

Charlie and Adam Go To IKEA | Adam x OFC (Charlie Bock) | Adam and Charlie Drabbles

Pairing: Adam x OFC (Charlie Bock)

Summary:  Adam broke a bookcase, Charlie takes him to IKEA to replace it.

Warnings: mentions of sex

-

Adam dragged his feet for the entire length of the parking lot leading up to the big blue building.

“Can’t you just pick out a bookcase by yourself?” Adam groaned. Even with sunglasses, he was squinting.

Charlie stopped dead in her tracks, causing Adam to run into her. She spun in place.

“Did I not warn you that the wall was better?”

Adam’s head dropped. “Yes.”

“You break it, you replace it. I went with you to get the couch from that storage unit of yours.”

“True.”

“I can’t believe with all the shit you have,” Adam opened his mouth to protest, Charlie cut him off. “you have not one, not two, but three copies of Lady Chatterley’s Lover but not a single spare bookcase.”

“How do you… Stop alphabetizing my porn, Charlie!” Adam demanded.

“I will, if you help me pick out a bookcase for it.” she giggled as she grabbed a big yellow bag and shoved it at Adam.

“Why do I need this?” He glared down at the bag as though it would bite him.

“For stuff.” Charlie hooked her arm into a second yellow bag and grabbed Adam’s arm to drag him up the escalator.

“We’re here for a bookcase. A bookcase won’t fit in here.” Adam grumbled.

Charlie turned to face him on the escalator, the stair making her taller than Adam for once. She kissed his nose. “You sweet summer child…” she taunted.

They stepped onto the floor on IKEA, and Charlie grabbed Adam’s hand to start the trek through the maze.

-

An hour later, Charlie is handing Adam packages of batteries while stuffing document boxes into her yellow bag.

“Charlie, no one needs this many batteries.” Adam puts back half the packages. “And we don’t need that many boxes.”

“You know all your old notebooks and papers?” Charlie raised an eyebrow.

Adam reached out. “Hand me three of the black ones.”

Charlie smiled and grabbed four. Another twenty minutes and they finally reached the bookcases. She gestured at them like a game show model.

“Ta-da! Take your pick.”

Adam wandered up and down, examining the bookcases. “None of these are acceptable.”

“Well, I am not spending money on an antique one.”

“Why not?”

“To have it break because you can’t control yourself?” Charlie tapped her foot as Adam stared her down. “I’ll make you a deal. I will spring for a lovely antique bookcase if you can promise you will never have sex with me against it?”

Adam stared and then looked at the bookcase he had his hand on. “I think this one will do nicely.”

Charlie did a little dance as she came up to hug him. “Perfect!” She snapped a photo of the tag.

“Why did you do that?” his tone growing more irritated by the moment.

“So we know where to get the boxes?”

“What boxes?”

Charlie kissed his cheek. “Why do you think I made you come with a truck?”

Adam groaned as they made their way to the lower level and Charlie handed Adam the trolley which he promptly ran into a wall.

“What kind of idiot builds a cart like this?”

“The Swedish. Want me to steer?” Charlie pointed to an aisle.

“I’m fine. Just got me out of this hell maze of a store.” Adam pushed the cart, and it veered off the wrong direction. “Fuck!”

Charlie chuckled and grabbed the front of the cart to steer Adam in the right direction. He heaved the boxes as though they weighed ounces, not pounds. Charlie paid as Adam stared down the poor teenager, checking them out.

“Your carts are an engineering nightmare, you realize that, right?” Adam piped up as Charlie shoved everything but the bookcase boxes into a big blue bag.

“Uh…” the kid blinked at Adam.

“Adam…” Charlie hissed as she tugged Adam out the door.

“What? They need to know.”

“The poor cashier can’t help you. So besides the poor engineering of the carts, how did you like IKEA?”

Adam contemplated the question as he lifted the bookcase boxes into the truck bed. “A necessary evil but not as bad as the grocery store or that other blue store you make me go.”

“Wal-mart?”

Adam’s nose scrunched up. “Yes.”

They took off back home and when they got home, Adam only cursed out the directions three times putting together the bookcase as Charlie “supervised” from the bed in the spare bedroom, assembling the boxes she purchased to corral Adam’s notes and scribblings.

“As ridiculous as their cart.” Adam groused as he righted the bookcase against the wall, throwing the instructions into a corner.

Charlie jumped to her feet and pressed against his side. “Stunning, darling.” She squeezed his hand.

“Thank you.my love.” He kissed her, wrapping his arms around her. “How about taking it for a test drive?” He caught Charlie’s lower lip with his teeth.

“How about we fill it up with books first so it doesn’t fall over?”

“How dare you be practical?” Adam nuzzled into her hair.

“Someone has to be. Otherwise we would have no furniture at all.”

[fogclearer]

‘ Kirigiri, I love you, but this is a time machine, not a bookcase from IKEA. ’

the flash ( sentence starters )

“Could you please take this at least a little bit   more seriously?” 

Despite the annoyance lacing her tone, there’s the ghost of a smile tugging at her lips. The source of her frustration isn’t her trusted partner, but rather the mess they got themselves into ; currently standing in the middle of what seems to be an explosion of screws, panels, and packaging paper. Against the walls are stacked boxes, some half unpacked and strewn about the room, making the already cramped space seem even smaller. There’s no telling where one pile ends and the next begins.

This wasn’t exactly what she’d been expecting when she’d asked him to help her move. 

Kyouko’s holding the instructions ( the paper a little bit crushed, after she’d gotten momentarily irked ) for the bookcase in an iron tight grip, scowl present on her features as she scans them over once more. 

“I’m sure we can figure this out.” 

[birdiethebibliophile]

Just a quick college AU inspired by @losebetter‘s Fjord fanart that was Just Exactly Right. Started like a month ago and finished real quick this morning because I have two weeks left of grad school and that feels like a lot right now.

CW for mentions of mental health struggles but otherwise completely G.

Important things about this AU:

-       Jester, Beau, Caduceus, and Nott are all freshmen

-       Caleb’s the one upperclassman who stayed in the residence halls because he got a scholarship that covers room and board

-       Fjord is their RA who’s very bad at being an RA (he tries…) and has had to write Jester up for noise violations about five times. Jester always apologizes and promptly forgets about the quiet hours rules again

-       Beau and Jester have been dating since week two of the first semester, when Jester decided that she did not, in fact, have a crush on the cute RA and instead had a crush on her roommate

-       Caleb does, in fact, have a crush on the cute RA

-       Said cute RA also has a crush on Caleb but is determined to not let him know about it because that’s Not Allowed, RAs dating residents, so they’re just pining until Caleb at LEAST moves out of Fjord’s floor

-       Nott’s Caleb’s roommate and reminds him that he gets free meals on campus so there’s absolutely no reason to not eat

-       Caduceus has the single at the end. Well, it’s not actually a single, but his roommate Yasha is never around, so he’s mostly just filled her side of the room with potted plants

-----

Beau had her calculus notes spread out over an entire table and was doing chin-ups on the balcony of the residence hall lounge when Fjord walked in and set his laptop down on her scribbled algorithms. It was two in the morning the Friday before finals, and everyone was barely holding it together. Caleb was hunched over a linguistics textbook in one corner of the room, Jester was fast asleep and clutching her Ikea shark in another, and various freshmen had been stumbling in and out all night, telling each other that really, it was one semester, it wouldn’t be the end of the world if they failed a few  tests.

“What’re you doing up?” Beau said, pulling herself back onto the balcony and into the room, closing the door behind her after seeing Jester shiver from the cool May breeze. “You on duty?”

“Nah,” Fjord said, pulling down the screen over one wall and blowing dust off the old-fashioned projector that always seemed to end up back in this room. “Just figured everyone needed a break from studying, including me.” He opened his laptop up and plugged it into the projector.

“I dunno about everyone else, but yeah, I sure do,” Beau said, flinging herself into the nearest armchair that wasn’t occupied. “Jes passed out about an hour ago in the middle of quizzing Nott on chemistry terms, so Nott ran out to get her some hot chocolate. She should be back soon.”

Fjord snapped his fingers. “That’s what I forgot. Okay, just a mo’.” As the projector hummed to complaining life, he opened Crunchyroll and pulled up an episode of Dragon Ball Z.

“Can you do Naruto instead?” Beau put in.

Fjord grinned at her. “Not this time. It’s a DBZ kind of night. Be right back. Tell Caleb that he should get his head out of his book for a few minutes.”

Beau sighed audibly and rolled her eyes, but once Fjord left the room, she started nudging Caleb. “Dude. Hey, dude. Time to take a break.”

Caleb looked up, his eyes taking a few seconds to focus. “Beauregard?”

“Fjord’s throwing an anime party in the middle of the night like the madman he is,” Beau said. “He told me to get you in on it.”

Caleb blinked up at the projector. “I suppose I have a few minutes,” he said, closing his textbook. “Do you know where Nott went?”

“She was going to make a convenience store run, I think,” Beau said.

“Did you tell her to get me more peach rings?” Caleb said hopefully.

“Dude, you’re going to turn orange if you eat any more of those things,” Beau said. “This is health advice from me, who once didn’t eat a vegetable for a week straight, so you should listen.”

“Beau?” Jester said sleepily, hugging her shark tighter. “Wha’s goin’ on?”

“Nothing, Jes, Fjord’s just being the kind and caring soul he is,” Beau said promptly.

Her girlfriend sat up and rubbed her eyes. “I didn’t mean to fall asleep,” she said. “I was helping Nott.”

“Nott went out on a supply run, don’t worry about it,” Beau said. “We’re taking a break, anyway.”

“A cookie break?” Jester said.

“Depends on what Nott gets,” Beau replied.

Jester made her grumpy face – the one that scrunched her nose up and made her look like she had twice as many freckles as she usually did – and gestured Beau to come over. Beau obligingly went and gave her a big hug, at which point Jester shoved her off again. “You’re stinky,” she complained.

“You just think everyone should smell like a candy store all the time,” Beau countered.

“A’ight,” Fjord said as he walked back in, juggling the residence hall kitchen’s electric kettle and entire tea supply, as well as an assortment of mugs that looked like he must’ve raided five different thrift stores to get. “No coffee, Cay. No caffeine for any of you, and I swear, if Nott comes back with any of that shitty 4-hour energy stuff, I’ll –” He stopped as everyone stared at him. “Yeah, she’s right behind me, isn’t she.”

“Yes, she is, and she’d appreciate it if you’d give her a little credit,” Nott’s voice creaked from behind him. She was holding two plastic grocery bags. “I didn’t get Caleb any more coffee, instant or otherwise, and  I didn’t get him any energy drinks. There’s studies that those give you heart attacks and Caleb’s heart needs all the help it can get.”

“Oh! Donuts!” Jester squealed as Nott started unloading her bags, including two boxes of powdered donuts. “Nott, you are the beeest, I love you so much, I promise next time you get a cold I won’t be annoyed when you take all my Emergen-C.”

By now, the projector had powered up and started sending a weak signal to the screen on the wall. “Really? Not Naruto?” Nott complained, climbing over the various chairs cluttering the lobby and plopping herself into Caleb’s lap, all pointy limbs and large eyes.

“Why does everyone always want to watch Naruto?” Fjord said, exasperated. “Cay, you want some chamomile?”

“Ja, please,” Caleb says.

Fjord nods and turns the kettle on. “Anyone else?”

“I don’t need tea,” Nott says, ripping open a package of Chips Ahoy. “I have –”

“Nope, nope, RA in the room,” Fjord interrupts. “Whatever you were about to say, I’m probably not allowed to hear it. Jes?”

“Nott brought me hot chocolate,” Jester said, already dumping three hot chocolate packets into one of the mugs. “Deucey would probably like some tea but I think he’s in his room, d’you want me to go see?”

“Nah, don’t want to wake him up, it’s late,” Fjord said.

Beau plopped a teabag of green jasmine in her mug. “Not a word,” she added, jabbing a finger in Fjord’s direction. “Dairon said it’s good for me.”

“Also, you like the taste,” Fjord added.

“Also, I like the taste,” Beau muttered. “But you’re not allowed to tell anyone. I have a reputation to maintain.”

“My lips are sealed,” Fjord assured her. “Everyone settled in and comfy?” He looked around the room, where his residents ten minutes ago had been buzzing with nervous energy, even asleep or absent. Now, they were all piled onto the old furniture of the room like they belonged there, clutching mugs and questionable snacks and sleepy eyes fixed on the dim projector screen. Caleb looked up at him and smiled, patting the chair next to him.

Fjord laughed a little and took the offered seat. “You have been working as hard as anyone,” Caleb said, peering at him over the reading glasses still perched on his face. “You can’t care for everyone else if you’re not caring for yourself.”

“Spoken like someone who knows what he’s talking about,” Fjord said, and let himself relax, at least for the moment.

Tomorrow, there would be finals, and patrolling the halls making sure no one was having a breakdown, and Jester would struggle through her history final, and Beau would frantically put the finishing touches on her sports health paper, and Caleb would ace his linguistics test and then go have a panic attack in the bathroom, but now, everyone was safe, and happy, hearts full of anime and bellies full of tea and processed sugar.

Just the way Fjord liked it.

[maximoffvizh]

fic: every witch needs a familiar

post-endgame fic born out of a conversation on twitter, sam and wanda friendship ft. a kitten

The apartment echoes with emptiness. Not her apartment, not yet. Just a collection of rooms with only the most basic furniture, only blinds over the windows instead of curtains. A world of blank walls and empty shelves, and her hollowed out self at the centre of it all, quiet and alone. She may have signed the papers and paid the first few months’ rent, but this isn’t her home. She can’t imagine how it ever will be.

A knock at the door forces her up from the couch, her socked feet padding over the floors, and she steps back in amazement at Sam outside the door, surrounded by bags and boxes. “What are you doing here?” she asks, and he just grins.

“Thought I’d help christen the new place,” he says. “So I bought dinner, wine, and a variety of snacks. But first we’re going to personalise the place. I went to IKEA for you.”

“You didn’t have to do that,” she says, watching him just move past her. Unpacking more than just dinner and snacks onto the counter, plastic cartons of fruit and cartons of eggs and bottles of milk and bags of pasta and packages of ready-to-cook vegetables and boxes of tea bags. “Sam?”

“There are many things you don’t know about me, Wanda Maximoff,” he says with an enigmatic smile. “Before I got caught up in superhero shenanigans, I wanted to go back to school and become an interior designer. So I went to IKEA, and I used a red theme to pick things out. I tried to stay neutral other than that, so the red pops.”

Somehow, his grin drags her along into helping to make her apartment more of a home. He hangs the grey curtains at her windows, plumps cushions on the couch and her bed, and she almost bursts into tears when he sets a guitar in her living room. “I took the liberty of hunting down a similar one,” he says, and she puts a hand to her mouth to hide her trembling lip. “See. You can make this place a home.”

“But he’s not here,” she says softly. Sadly. And Sam slips an arm around her waist and kisses her temple, squeezing her tightly.

“I know,” he says, and opens the flap of one last box. “I also, ah, took the liberty of hunting down some memories for you. This was the best I could do since the compound was destroyed.”

She does tear up when she pulls out the first frame, the official photograph of the New Avengers team taken in 2015. Natasha’s frozen, touchingly proud face makes the first tear fall, and she ghosts a fingertip gently over Vision’s awkward smile, her chest aching with the need to have his arms around her again. Every frame is perfect, photographs of her with Clint’s children, with Steve and Natasha and Sam, with Vision. The memories of the life she’s left behind. “Thank you,” she breathes through tears, and Sam just smiles.

“You’re always welcome, Maximoff,” he says, and breaks away as she stares into a picture Vision took of the two of them on a beach somewhere in Europe, his hair falling over his sunglasses and freckles breaking out on her cheeks, her lips pressed to his cheek. “I bought mac and cheese. Even remembered to add some spice for you.”

They settle down on the couch with dinner and wine, and she finds herself relaxing into it, just a little. Even if when Sam leaves the shadows creep up again and she can’t sleep for the nightmares and she sits in the bathroom in the middle of the night shaking and crying, when he’s there she can relax. She can know he’ll take care of her.

Somehow, it turns into a weekly ritual. No matter what Sam is doing, what he’s dealing with out in the real world now the mantle of Captain America has passed to him, every Friday night he turns up at her door. Usually with a new knick knack for her apartment in one hand, and dinner in the other. Fairy lights to wrap around the curtain pole in her room, a pasta machine, a new houseplant, a record player including a few of his favourite records from before she was born. He chooses something mindless and uplifting on Netflix, and they sit on the couch and eat quietly.

She makes the mistake of telling him how much she’s struggling to sleep, and he appears at the door with a stack of lavender products, telling her they’re supposed to help her sleep. She confesses that she doesn’t want to go back to dark hair, and he helps her re-dye hers, even cleaning up the murder scene her bathroom becomes under the red dye. He shows her how to make bread, and she pretends not to notice that he never leaves her with any leftover wine for fear that she’ll use it to cope. He gently asks if she thinks she should see a therapist, and she shakes her head and they leave it at that.

Over the months, she thought it would get easier. But it’s been six months, and it never has. She still wakes up every morning in a cold bed, missing Vision, wishing she could just reach for him like she used to be able to. When Sam doesn’t come to see her, she eats leftovers, or nothing. She spends sleepless nights listening to love songs, the words of them eating her up inside, beautiful words she never said to Vision. She wasn’t brave enough.

Tucked into a heavy jumper, reading one of the books that Laura sent her after she cleared out the shelves at the farmhouse, she doesn’t bother to move when the doorbell rings. It’s Friday night, six thirty, and Sam has a key, and she can hear him opening the door, moving around behind her. Then she starts violently when he pulls the book out of her hands and replaces it with a tiny ball of brown fluff that lets out a squeak of a sneeze and blinks blue eyes at her.

“Sam?” she asks, twisting to look at him, hands instinctively cradling the kitten. “Why is there a kitten in my apartment?”

“Well, here’s the thing,” Sam says, turning the dial to pre-heat her oven and dusting his hands off to pull a food bowl and a litter tray and a bag of litter and an assortment of toys out of a bag. “I was at the shelter this week, because Barnes is thinking about getting a dog and he’s got it in his head that he wants a rescue and I grew up with dogs so I’ve obviously offered to lend my expertise in helping him choose the right one. And I was chatting to the girl there, being my usual charming self, and she recognised me and said I must know a lot of people in need of some animal companionship. So I said I did, but not all of them have the space for a big running dog like Barnes wants. So she showed me the kittens, and that little guy just caught my eye.”

The kitten presses his paws into Wanda’s chest, leaving pale hairs on the red wool of her sweater, and she cradles him a little closer, feeling his tiny thin body shivering beneath her hands. “What happened to him?” she asks, a rush of protectiveness rising in her at this tiny powerless little thing that needs someone to help.

“His mom got hit by a car,” Sam says. “Tragic accident. And they were a litter of five, and most of them got adopted quickly. He was the runt, and he never pushed to the front and purred. She thinks he needs a special someone to look after him. Someone who’s been hurt too.”

“I see where you’re going with this,” she says, and Sam smiles. And the kitten mews quietly, so high-pitched, kneading his paws into her shoulder, and she looks down into his huge eyes and feels herself melting. “I don’t know the first thing about looking after a cat.”

“Feed him, water him, make sure he’s scratching the post Uncle Sam got him and not the furniture, love him,” Sam says. “I even did some light Googling to check none of your plants are poisonous for cats. They’re not.”

“Sam, I...I can’t accept him,” she says, and the kitten mews when she moves him away from her, paws pulling at the air like he wants to get back to being cradled against her chest.

“I even bought him a collar with a bell on!” Sam says, shaking the length of red to jingle the tiny bell. “See, it’s to match you.” He moves towards her, the hum of the oven filling the silence, and carefully pushes her hands back to her chest, the kitten curling up against her with a contented sigh. “I know you’ve been going through it, Wanda. Don’t be too hard on yourself. You need a companion apart from me. Every witch needs a familiar.”

“Does he have a name?” she asks, and Sam shakes his head. She rubs two fingers carefully over the space between the kitten’s ears, his fur so soft, and asks, “What do you think about Hex?”

“I think that’s an adorable name for a witch’s familiar,” Sam says, and she smiles, suddenly teary-eyed. She moves Hex closer, and he chirps quietly, curling into her. “He’s going to look after you when I’m not here.”

“Sam,” she breathes, overwhelmed and trying not to cry. And Sam leans down to brush a kiss against the top of her head, and she ducks her head to hide the falling tears in Hex’s fur.

They eat dinner on the couch, Hex in her lap and staring at her with huge pleading eyes until she gives him a tiny piece of the salmon Sam made for them. When Sam leaves, taking the bottle of wine they only drank a little of with him, she means to start as she wants to go on, with Hex in a bed in the front room and not on her pillow. But he cries until she relents, and his tiny body curls into her in the bed, warming her the way it used to warm her to sleep plastered against Vision’s back.

When she wakes up in the middle of the night, breath coming in rapid-fire jerks after another nightmare, Hex is there. She cradles him carefully in her hands, and he purrs and butts his head against her face, his chest rising and falling beneath her hand. The motion of it soothing her slowly back to sleep.

[rikotin]

Fictober 2019 – Prompt #15 “That’s what I’m talking about!”

Title: Of Cardboard and Meatballs Fandom & characters: Skam – Isak Valtersen / Even Bech Næsheim   Words: 1805 Notes: at the end of the prompt

Read on AO3 _________________________

Isak stood right outside their apartment door staring at it with a slight frown on his face, the two tote bags filled with groceries starting to get heavier by the minute. His cheeks were still a bit flushed by the crisp air of the fallen autumn, degrees outside abruptly dropping into something unacceptably chilly. Unfortunately, his choice of a thick coat paired with Even’s ridiculously patterned – yet oddly endearing – scarf felt uncomfortably warm after standing in the hallway for a good fifteen minutes, but he was still second guessing opening the door. If the loud bangs, swearing, and crashing sounds were anything to go by, he was very much doubting he’d be too delighted with whatever scene he was about to be faced with.

Taking a deep breath and letting out an almost exaggerated sigh, Isak finally put another bag down next to his leg, carefully balanced it upright against his shin and started digging for the keys somewhere in his pockets. After managing to pull out the tangled bunch of keys and keychains, a particularly loud bang startled him to freeze for a split second before he shook his head a little, unlocking the door to the – apparent – chamber of doom.

”Hello?” Isak called out cautiously, tossing the keys carelessly at the small table to his side. On it was a basket, meant for all the trinkets, coins and miscellaneous knick-knacks that didn’t have a proper place in the flat, as well as for both of their keys. Because of the lack of focus for the supposedly insignificant task of placing the keys properly into the basket, Isak had spent many mornings crawling around the corner trying to find them from wherever he might’ve flung them but alas, he never learned.  

He placed the bags to the side of the corridor, shutting the door behind him and kicking his shoes off in the same general direction with the keys, taking a better look at the corridor. The hallway that led to other rooms of the flat was usually mostly empty – apart from some of the last boxes that still waited to be sorted after moving into the bigger flat a few weeks back – was truly a sight for sore eyes. There was cardboard, plastic and pieces of styrofoam everywhere.  

Isak’s brows shot up and he took a sharp breath. By no means was he the tidiest person – by any means if he was completely honest – but this looked like a truckload of packaging materials had exploded in the apartment, which did rouse some premature annoyance and anxiety just thinking about how much cleaning it would take to drag all of the garbage out.

Another slam and a familiar voice colourfully swearing at whatever it was that caused the sound got him finally moving from his spot, carefully avoiding all the clutter spread out on the floor.

”Even?” Isak called a bit more firmly, finally managing his way to the door of their living room. The floor was scattered with different kinds of screws, tools and torn papers that looked like they had been pages of some sort of instruction manual before someone had brutally shredded them apart. He was fairly certain one of them had had ”IKEA” spelled in the corner and honestly, it did explain a whole lot of the situation.  

In the middle of the glorious mess of a living room there was Even, brows scrunched together and lips pressed into a tight line in concentration. He was currently hunched over a pile of boards that were partially connected together, yet Isak was completely at loss as to what it was supposed to be.

”What the hell? How is this supposed to fit here?

Even mumbled to himself, picking up a smaller one of the boards and lifted it closer his face to inspect something on it, turning it a few times before trying to shove it back in. The sight was so puzzling, Isak found himself just standing there again, staring at the scene in front of him. The curiosity did tickle the back of his mind but was yet to surpass the utter bafflement he was currently in.  

He stood there a while longer, just looking at Even’s turned back while he apparently worked to get the pieces to match, when there was a soft click and a very loud:

”That’s what I’m talking about!”

Even practically jumped up and pumped his fist in the air, performing a victory spin. When he saw Isak, his next reaction was to shriek and stumble backwards, the heel of his left foot hitting the structure he had just gotten together. Even fell ungracefully backwards, landing on his side while Isak just continued to stare at him with wide eyes.

”Shit! Are you okay?”

Isak hurried forward next to his boyfriend who was already hauling himself up and, after some maneuvering, managed to sit with a grunt. He gave Isak a sheepish smile, rubbing his aching side lightly, while Isak busied himself checking nothing was bleeding or seemed broken.  

”Hi babe, when’d you get home?” Even asked, his smile transforming into a grimace, ”Maybe try not to appear out of thin air behind innocent assemblers next time.”  

”I tried at first, but then I got busy being horrified with the fact that you’ve turned our flat into an impromptu dumpster.”

Isak rolled his eyes, catching Even’s hands with his and pulled him back up as he stood up himself. The task seemed much easier than it turned out to be because Even was like dead weight – just for the sake of it. It crossed his mind to let go of his hands for the equally pesky effect but Even’s quiet groan made him take pity on him, and Isak finally managed to pull him all the way up.

”You’re not seriously hurt, are you?” Isak asked again, gently poking Even’s side, making him wince slightly. Even huffed out a little laugh regardless, shaking his head and bringing a hand up to cradle his ribs.  

”Nah, all good. It’s probably my pride that suffered most of the damage,” he assured Isak, a small smile turning into a grin, ”I’m finished anyway, so it’s fine.”  

It was now that Isak remembered the coat and the scarf he was still wearing, realization making him alerted by the light sweat trickling down his forehead. Isak took off his scarf and shucked the coat quickly, leaving them on the floor amongst the  mess that already covered the room. Even quirked an eyebrow and he opened his mouth to make a comment, but Isak’s sharp gaze made him settle with a snort and a small shake of his head.  

Isak walked the short way back to the structure on the floor, crossing his arms and tilting his head a little, taking in the result of Even’s rampage that had echoed to the outside of the flat.

”So this is what the commotion was about”, he stated matter-of-factly as Even came to stand next to him, humming in agreement.  

”Yeah, I was coming back from work and there it was: a huge announcement of your pretentious little bookcase being half the usual price. Right next to the Swedish meatball dinner.” Isak burst out laughing, turning his head to Even who had a goofy grin on his face.

”It’s not– you and those fucking Swedish meatballs, I swear…” he managed out as Even slipped his hand behind Isak’s back and pressed a sloppy peck high on his cheekbone. Even pressed his lips near Isak’s ear, grinning as Isak shuddered slightly at the touch.

”I promise you that in my heart there is only enough space there for one specific pair of authentic Norwegian balls,” Even spoke, his low voice going straight into Isak’s ear, causing Isak to  immediately swat away his now snickering boyfriend.

”God, aren’t you a handful sometimes,” Isak huffed disapprovingly and glared at his boyfriend who really liked to play with fire and approached him again. Even’s grin seemed to only grow and Isak found it was truly difficult to try to maintain the irritated expression on his face when Even looked just so bright and silly. He bent closer and Isak allowed him to place a gentle kiss on his lips, letting a quiet, content sigh slip out.

”You love me,” Even teased, wiggling his eyebrows before gesturing proudly towards the assembled bookcase. ”And you better love your new piece of furniture now that we got it at a reasonable price.”

”It wasn’t even that expensive in the first place,” Isak tried to argue, while knowing full well he was lying – mostly to himself to try and reason his desire for the oddly designed bookrack. Even simply gaped at him, lifting his eyebrows so far up they were almost touching his hairline.  

”The full price of 7459 kroner for a fucking bookshelf” he stated dryly, stressing every single digit  and leaning into Isak accusingly, causing him to lean back in response, “is not that expensive, he says. How much is that? Over half a month’s rent?” Isak couldn’t even argue because Even was painfully right so he settled on sulking, casting his eyes to side.

”It’s a cool bookshelf, whatever…” he grumbled, face softening just the tiniest bit, ”Thank you, though. For buying it, I mean. I didn’t think you’d remember. It was well before we even moved in here that I saw it. I’m still a little bitter that we didn’t have room for it in the studio we had back then, though.”  

Even simply smiled, wrapping his arms around Isak’s waist and pulling him closer. He pressed a kiss on Isak’s forehead, wrinkling his nose immediately after.  

”You’re sweaty,” he complained and Isak laughed warmly, pressing just a bit closer, making Even squirm a bit but he made no move to escape, so Isak propped his chin against Even’s shoulder.

”Didn’t have courage to come in sooner so I almost got toasted outside of our door inside my coat. Did you know some kind of hurricane passed through our room?” he asked and grinned widely when Even gasping as if he was shocked/ in fake shock.  

”No way! You need to tell me all about it when we take a shower together,” he exclaimed, walking Isak backwards towards the bathroom door. Isak let out an amused laugh, stumbling a bit over the screws under their feet.  

”Of course. And you’ll promise to clean up this junkyard of flat, yeah?” Now it was Even who barked out a laugh just as he pulled the bathroom door open with a bit of an struggle, reaching past Isak.

”It’s your goddamn bookshelf that was safely wrapped in that ridiculous amount of trash and me you scared the living shit out of. With all due respect, love, have fun cleaning.” _________________________

Notes: Thank you for reading! Would I even be a Finn at all if I didn’t dedicate my first ever Evak ficlet to IKEA furniture? 

All the love for dear mynameisnotthepoint for proofreading my nightly production

As always, I’d love to hear your thoughts, no matter how long or short - all the comments and reblogs and likes are appreciated dearly! This is my second work for Fictober 2019 and you can find all the works on here with #fictober19 or on my AO3, under the series “Fictober 2019″

[olivia-calidamn]

idk when i’m gonna write this modern au where Olivia is Bea II’s au pair for the summer but i wrote this

some background context in this link plus this below:

so modern au where Olivia’s a regular librarian, she’s good friends with Kit and Dewey, and in the past has babysat Bea II every now and then; when Bea finishes her first year at a not-shitty Prufrock with a huge prank, she’s punished by being kept home from Hotel Denouement’s anniversary cruise, with Olivia being her 24/7 au pair for the summer; Olivia balances taking care of a moody pre-teen Bea with falling in love with Jacquelyn who’s working the hotel’s security and Esmé who’s their financial advisor (she works elsewhere)

this is just a little scene from it (1035 words)

“I’m not getting you any takeout for lunch, and that’s that. Not after what happened in the lobby.”

“Olivia,” Bea said, not looking up from her hairbrush, “Do you know how to let things go?”

“Yes, I do, but-”

“Like this.”

Olivia watched her drop her brush. She then looked up, even her eyes telling her just how annoyed she was. “See?”

“What you did in the lobby? We can’t let that go yet. I’m punishing you for it.”

“Okay. Dish out your worst torture technique, will you? Since I’m such a brat.”

“You’re not a-” Olivia caught herself; the lobby incident really was enough to make her rethink that.

Bea raised an eyebrow. A defiant one. Very Slytherin of her.

“Alright. Fine. Go to your room, and don’t come out until I tell you to.”

Bea merely stared at her. Olivia realised her mistake, and began closing her bedroom door.

Goodness, she sounded like her Mother. Olivia shuddered, before heading to the spare bedroom. Maybe she could spend Bea’s punishment time with a couple of unread fanfics stored on her iPad-

She ended up falling asleep.

When she woke, she decided this 24/7 au pair thing was much more tiring than she’d expected. Especially now Bea had been practically possessed by… goodness knew what. She wondered if Aunt Gwendolyn could recommend any remedies to tame the possessing creature in question. Or at least, get Bea to behave.

Of course, as she shook off the heavy, even nauseous feeling that sleeping during the daytime gave her, Olivia tried to think positively. Maybe Bea had calmed down a little in the, hmm, three hours she’d been asleep. And didn’t actually need a spiritual cleansing. She had a feeling it was a long shot, thinking Bea could be back to her usual self by now, but she sure liked to hope so.

When she opened Bea’s door, though? She was wrong.

“Oh, my goodness.”

The whole place looked like something out of a crime scene. Every piece of furniture had either moved, or been upturned. Several piles of clothes sat in mountains on the floor. There were posters, and photos, and things on sheets of paper, covering every inch of the floorspace left; some of them had made it up on the wall. Everything was moving slightly, to the pulsing of a song’s beat, and someone yelling about a mighty fall- Was that Fall Out Boy?!

Not to mention Bea’s whole library had been tossed from her bookshelf; looking to it made Olivia’s skin crawl.

Bea and her beanbag sat in the middle of the carnage - she was back on her iPad, playing Minecraft, the remnants of a McDonald’s lunch beside her.

“Beatrice!”

She turned around, frowning. “There’s no need for the b-word-”

“What is all of this?!”

“Room renovating.”

“Um, why?”

“Why not?”

“Your parents will flip?”

Bea shrugged, returning to her iPad. “I’ve got two months to fix it. I’m going to The End.”

“The end of your life? You sure are. Just, Bea, why?”

Now Olivia dared to make her way inside, though did so with utmost care; in case the whole room swallowed her whole. Or she stepped on a stray Littlest Pet Shop pet. She couldn’t have Bea any madder with her.

“Okay. We’re sorting this out. Right now.”

“Later.”

“Or I’ll ground you for longer.”

“You ungrounded me.”

Olivia stopped, frowning. “When?”

“I went into your room earlier, asked if I could be ungrounded, and you said yes.”

Bea’s straight face sure made her question the untruthfulness in this lie. For a hot second, she wondered if she really had told her- No.

“No, I didn’t. I was asleep.”

“You were?” Bea echoed, not even visibly phased in the slightest. “Weird. You definitely said yes. And you told me you don’t sleeptalk.”

“I don’t, no.” Olivia ventured further, then noticed a cardboard box against one wall. It hadn’t been there before. “What’s that?”

“A package.”

“For whom, with what inside, and why, and how?”

“Me, a clothes hanger from Ikea, and because,” Bea said, without missing a beat. Or looking up from her iPad. Olivia had a feeling the cold fries she offered her were either salt (and oil) in the wound, or another blatant display of her defiance of her. “And with money.”

“So you had that delivered?”

“Express delivered. The hotel has some deal with Dad and my Uncles. And I-”

“You went to McDonald’s after I supposedly ungrounded you,” Olivia cut in. “I noticed.” And she didn’t even know where the nearest McDonald’s was. “So you-”

“What? Oh, the McDonalds? They deliver now. I guess you didn’t know.” Now looking up again, she said, “I actually haven’t left the hotel. Or the penthouse. I just wanted to get ungrounded just in case I was asked to go anywhere.”

“And how, do you think, would you have gotten my permission to leave?”

After pausing, Bea offered, “By asking?”

“While I was asleep?”

“Yeah, I was gonna ask, or just make you say yes to something else to-“

Bea stopped. Now, she looked genuinely afraid. Like she knew she’d tripped up, and wasn’t gonna be getting up and running along with fooling Olivia any time soon. Not for now, at least; Olivia would give her a little credit.

Olivia waited a moment, rubbing the salt and oil into the wound. Which was probably a little cruel. When she thought about it, her idea on a punishment was probably cruel, too. Or was that what Bea kind of, maybe, perhaps, deserved for her efforts?

She then gave a wry chuckle, and felt much more like her Mother, but somehow crueler. “Conning the half-conscious, huh? Smart. But I got you, Bea.”

“I didn’t leave. That’s the main thing.”

“You planned to. And you’re getting punished for that, and the state of your room, and-”

“And the lobby. I get it.”

“I was gonna say your purchases, too. Did your Mom tell you that you’re meant to ask me to use your card?”

She looked up. “No?”

Oh, this kept getting better and better. Or worse than worse. It was unclear. “You’re in trouble now, Beatrice.”

“Still no need for the b-word.”

[paepsi]

EXO as dumb shit I’ve done, EXPLAINED:

Suho: 

See this picture here? This is me before the moving team. I was so fucking proud of myself for strapping the base of the chair to my roof (it wouldn’t fit through the trunk of me smol hatchback). I thought it was funny that it kinda looked like a kip-pah and asked my friend to take a pic for me here (see my lil peace sign next to my face? im v happy of my jew car). Little did I know that after driving to my new apartment with the whole moving team from IKEA unloading shit from the truck, I would be stuck in the fucking car. I didn't have a knife or scissors to cut the strings and I didn't want to make my dumb assery to be noticed; so instead of asking for help... I climbed out the front window and almost fell flat on my ass. When I stood up and turned around, the whole moving team was just standing there looking at me. The assholes knew I was stuck and let me suffer.

Kris & Kai:

so these moments both happened in the same night. I went to a house warming party for my friend and I didn't know what to bring as a gift, so I just bought two big bags of Hawaiian bread. Now throughout the night, the more I drink, the more impulsive I get. 

I started putting the bread on people's shoulders, slowly piling them up until they noticed. Everyone was pretty wasted so there was no surprise when I had a stack of 4 1/2 buns (I ate half) on my friends shoulder. Anyways- fast forward into the night, I'm craving sweets, so I walk into my friends kitchen and find a jar of cookies. At the time I thought it was a brilliant idea to just put the Hawaiian bread in there so the kitchen looked full; a fair exchange, if you will. At least that's what I thought... I found pictures from the party and it turns out I just ended up putting in a half eaten bun sjzjsj

Fast forward into the morning of the next day, I’m hungover and I wake up wearing mismatching socks (one is mine, the other I have no idea). 

I needed to get home because I had work later that day, so I hop into my car and start driving home. The whole time there was this annoying beeping sound that I couldn’t figure out where it was coming from. I had such a bad headache that I pulled over to see what the fuck was wrong. I got out of my car, checked the wheels, checked the under the hood, then hopped back inside. I was so frustrated that I banged my head on the steering wheel and just rested my eyes for a sec. When I opened them to look straight ahead at my dashboard, the brake light was glowing bright red. I cried.

Chanyeol: 

One summer evening, I was hanging with my sister and her friends around a campfire. We were roasting marshmallows, drinking, having a good time etc. Eventually later into the night we started getting bored and one of my sister’s friends suggested playing hot potato with the coals from the fire. We’re all game like FUCK YEAH LETS DO THIS. Then we start tossing it around and realize that it’s way too fucking hot, so instead of tossing it’s just everyone spiking the coal to the next person. FYI, I have terrible hand eye coordination and I wasn’t wearing my glasses that night. Every single time the coal was spiked my way it would miss my hand and fly straight into my hair. The next day I woke up, looked in the mirror, skipped breakfast and headed straight to the salon. still looked cute or w/e so I ain’t mad

Kyungsoo: 

Ahhhh, this one is actually pretty personal and happened not too long ago! My mom finally left this dirt bag she’d been married to for the past 16 years. When I say dirt bag, I mean a manipulative, abusive piece of shit. My mom was so tired during her session with the mediator for when they were deciding who was getting what; she took 30-45 minutes to talk alone with them and he took 3 fucking hours putting on this sick sob story. The mediator was so done with him too that they just let him do whatever he wanted. That meant he had the “right” to pick and choose what belonged to him in our apartment. The fucker took EVERYTHING. He took the furniture, the bedroom sets, all the electronics, the spices- HE DOESN’T EVEN COOK. However, a week before then, I bought a huge bottle of vanilla. I needed it to make edible cookie dough, which I was doing everyday out of stress. The day before he finally moved out, I came home from work to see everything wrapped/packed up. I started to get worked up and went to the kitchen to make my cookie dough. When I opened the cabinet to get my vanilla and saw it completely empty, I lost it. I literally screamed and started tearing up all the boxes, finding more shit that belonged to me and stopped when I finally found my vanilla. I went back to the kitchen, happily made my cookie dough and kicked back on "his” couch with my dirty shoes on. Later that night, the asshole came home and screamed at me. I shut him up tho when I told him I’d suffocate him with a pillow in his sleep if he dared to touch me or any of my things ever again. He didn’t stay in the apartment that night lol

Baekhyun:

I think this one might be my favorite story. It all started when a package from my mom in the mail never showed up even though the UPS tracking said it had already arrived on my doorstep. I assumed in meant the package was stolen and got really bummed about it since it had some essential items in there. My roommates felt bad and decided to cheer me up by throwing a house party (woohoo! cue the alcohol!). It started at like 3pm and went on all the way until 4 am the next day. Somewhere within that time frame while it was still light outside, slightly tipsy, I found a ladder on the side of the house and had a strong urge to follow it up to the top; and who am I to deny every desire that comes across my pea sized brain. I was half-way up to the roof when one of my roommates spotted me (let’s call him Big Ned; there were two guys named Ned in our house so we just called them Big Ned and Little Ned; Big Ned is like 6′3″ and Little Ned is like 5′4″). Big Ned started yelling at me to get down and I told him I couldn’t because it was my destiny to reach the top. He decided that there was no use arguing with me and ended up following me to the roof (even though he’s afraid of heights; bless his BFG heart). He’s kinda hard to miss, so when he started making his way up to the roof with me, it grabbed a lot of attention. Some joined us. Meanwhile, I decided to walk around and look into my neighbors yards. I saw a mess of papers in one of the alleys between our houses and joked “lmao that’d be funny if that was my package”. We laughed for a bit then looked a little closer until we realized oh fuck that’s my package. My body moved on it’s own and just kinda scrambled across the roof trying to figure out the fastest and least painful way to get off the roof. Thank the stars for Big Ben holding me back by the collar of my shirt and preventing me from jumping down onto the neighbors fence. Little Ben ended up running over and jumping the fence to get it for me. We still don’t know how it got there.

Tao:

In middle school, I had to go on this field trip to some ranch out in the countryside of Texas. I remember we were all huddled into a barn with a big stage in the back. The teachers grabbed a mic and got on stage to talk about who knows what. Idk I wasn’t paying attention, talking to my friend, in my own world. When the mics go off, everyone starts chattering. At that moment in time, I was extremely preoccupied with my shoelaces when I got a tap on my shoulder from my homeroom teacher. I think she was mad at me for not listening and told me to head up to the stage along with a few other students making their way over. Being in front of others makes me nervous, but when the teachers put a bib around my neck before I got on stage, I was too confused to think of anything else. When another teacher started handing out baby bottles filled with Gatorade to each student on stage, I had to stop them to ask what was going on. And what do ya know, I’m in a baby bottle drinking contest. Before I had time to ask any more questions, they were already counting down to start. Now listen, I’m not the type of person to back down from a challenge so ofc you know I’m gonna suck the soul out of this bich. The reason I can say this confidently is because up until I was 11 years old, I always drank out of baby bottles when I got home from school. I just really liked the feeling?? For me, nothing beat chilling on the couch, watching Teen Titans and drinking fresh cold orange juice from a baby bottle on a hot summer day. Idk but I guess it came in handy since I finished a 24oz bottle under 35 seconds. The rest of the kids weren’t even close to half way through. There’s a picture of me at the back of my school year book holding up the baby bottle like a trophy.

Sehun:

Remember my sisters friends from the campfire? Well I spent a good long summer hanging with her friend group and ended up getting kinda close to this one of the guys (let’s call him Jake). I have a really broad range of music taste and I guess he digged that so we talked a lot about music together. By the end of the summer, Jake threw a party at his house and invited me over. Ngl I wanted some dick so ofc I’m gonna go all out and break out my hot leather Madonna outfit. I head out with my sis and the house is packed by the time we get there. The whole time we’re pretty much just hanging out, drinking and dancing the night away. Some time passed 1 am (I think), I’m sorta outside making out with Jake on the side of his house. It’s getting really hot and heavy. When we finally broke apart for air, he told me he though he was in love with me. I’m screaming internally, panicking and I don’t know what to do. I could tell from way before that he really liked me, but I didn’t think it was to that extent. It doesn’t help exactly that I don’t feel the same way for him. Don’t get me wrong! He was really hot and sweet, but I just couldn’t see myself with him. So what did I tell him? Nothing. My dumb ass was in such a panic that all I could think of was that I needed to run. I did. I ran back into the house, out the front porch, spotted his skateboard and took off. I didn’t really know where I was or where I was going but somehow I ended up at the train station and eventually found my way back home.

Xiumin:

On my 21st birthday, my roommates took me out to a really nice, 5 star restaurant in the city we lived. They're buying me all the drinks I want cause heck I'm finally legal! Now, I think y'all can see a pattern of what happens when I drink. So when Big Ned got a glass of scotch and I had just finished off my last sip of wine, I wanted some too. I asked him to share, using "it's my birthday" to get my way. Ever the gentleman, Big Ben pours half his glass into my wine glass and keeps his raised for a cheers. The whole group joins in and with a shout of Mozeltov, I slam the wine glass down on the table and toss it back. It wasn't until I finished the last drop and tried to set my glass back on the table that I realized I snapped the stem in half. No one spoke, except for Little Ned, softly, "did you... did that really just happen?" Yeah. Yeah it did. Thankfully the restaurant agreed to keep the broken glass off the bill as long as I left the restaurant immediately.

Chen:

On a Saturday night, I met up with a good friend of mine that I hadn’t seen in months. We bought some snacks and drinks then drove to a marina near my apartment (new place in California). The whole night we spent catching up and throwing rocks in the water. I was still a little tipsy when it was time to go home and my friend ended up driving me back. On the way back, I opened a bag and snacked on some pizza flavored goldfish. I was about a fourth of the way through the bag when I decided I didn’t like it anymore and started tossing them out the window. We pull up to a stop light and my friend is trying to make me stop by rolling up the window, but I stick my leg out before he could close it. Next he tries to compromise and said if I wasn’t going to eat the goldfish, I should just put the bag down and remove my leg from the window. My tipsy ass told him no, I was handing out free food. I turned to look at the car next to me, asked (yelled) if they wanted any goldfish and held out the bag to them. I guess the dude thought it was funny and was just like “yeah sure why not, lifes too short to not eat goldfish from a stranger at a stoplight” alksdjflskdj 

Lay:

When I was about 6 years old, I lived out in the suburbs of Fulshear, Texas. The community is really tiny and everyone knew each other. One time, I was playing hide and seek with my siblings, and decided to hide under my moms bed. While I was waiting for my brother to come find me, I fell asleep. A couple hours later I wake up and it’s dark out. The house is empty. I’m calling out to see if anyone is home, checking all the rooms. I thought maybe everyone decided to tag me “it” since I passed out. After a while of not finding anyone, the phone rings and I pick up. It’s my mom sounding out of breath calling to see if anyone found me and took me back to my house. Turns out I had actually been knocked out for 6 hours. Not being able to find me during hide and seek for 2 hrs, my siblings went to get my mom who also started looking for me. After another hour and no luck, she called our neighbors across the street to see if I went over to play with their kids. Ofc they said no and said they would call some other people in the neighborhood to find out if they'd seen me. A few hours later, the whole neighborhood was out looking for me. Meanwhile I'm at home chilling on the couch watching Teletubbies and eating goldfish (the original babey).

Luhan:

My dad took me and my siblings to the beach almost every summer in elementary school. We would always stay at this Holiday Inn right across the street from the sands. At night, we would go “hunting” for crabs with a flashlight and a fishnet. But on some nights when my dad was too tired to go out, my siblings and I would hang in the kids room at the hotel. We were fooling around and just being kids. Then we found a big case filled with tubes of paint. I was excited to do some finger painting but before I could reach for a tube, my brother stopped me to say he had an idea. He dared us lay down our sheets of paper and paint them by jumping on the tubes. Being the youngest of four, I thought this was a brilliant idea and immediately got to work. Set my paper down and lined up the colors I wanted to use. I jumped.... Only a spec of paint made it onto the paper... The rest beautifully decorated the off-white walls of the kids room. We all just froze because oh my stars we’re gonna be in so much trouble. Turning to each other, we made a very strong pinky promise to not tell a soul what happened. The next day when we returned to the kids room, the case was gone, faded splotches of green and purple remained on the walls, and a big paper taped above reading “NO PAINTING ALLOWED”.

Fun fact: my eldest sister used to write about my adventures for her creative essay homework’s in middle school.

[cchellacat]

The Checkout

Love All The Marvel Ships Challenge 

Day Seven ~ Shopping

Bucky/Darcy  Tissue warning.  I’m sorry.

Bucky hated crowds.  It’s why he’s grocery shopping at 3 in the morning in the 24 hour store five blocks from the Tower on a Tuesday night.

The place is quiet, only the cashier at the checkout slumped over the register, head phones over his ears as he bobs his head tiredly to whatever noise passes for music these days.

Although the range of produce to buy has multiplied exponentially since the 40’s he wishes things were simpler, trying to choose a breakfast cereal was a nightmare.  Rice, wheat, oats, chocolate, nuts, honey, sugar frosted?  Puffs, flakes, pillows….  Are they kidding him?  Who needs this much variety?  It’s just cereal.

The bell gives a muted jingle and he looks up and spies an oddly familiar head enter the shop, a riot of wavy curls swept up in a clip.  He’s seen her before.  She works down in the astrophysics labs at the Tower.   Daria or Dacey or something.  He ignores her, the girl’s not a threat, and goes back to searching the cereal.

“Hey there soldier, I know you have a bad ass rep as an assassin, but the cereal didn’t do anything, what’s the problem?”  It’s the girl, she’s peering up at him with tired eyes through rectangular frames.  She has a basket slung over her arm and is filling it to overflowing with a multitude of boxes of pop tarts.

He grunts, hoping she’ll leave him alone, he’s got no interest in talking.

“You know, answering me will be less painless than the cereal-killer jokes I’ll be making tomorrow if I don’t get context for that murder glare.”

He glances back down at her, she’s moved closer and there is the faintest hint of a smile in her eyes.  What the hell is wrong with her, didn’t she read the briefings all the staff in the Tower were made to sign?

“Tough crowd.”  She mutters with a roll of her eyes before reaching across him to grab a bag of muesli.

“Have you got a death wish sweetheart?”                                                            

This time it’s her that glares.

“Okay… One, don’t call me sweetheart and two, no, I’m just trying to be friendly.  Three, if you threaten me like that again I will tase you in the junk.”

He’s caught off guard at the abrupt indignation in her voice.  She’s all of five two and bristling at him with all the menace of a wet kitten.  He sighs internally, taking in the dressing down and reluctantly admitting he deserves it.  His mother would be rolling in her grave if she knew he talked to a lady like that.

“Sorry….  Still not used to being a person again yet.  I wasn’t threatenin’ you I just…  You know who I am right?”

“Well like duh, of course I know who you are.”

“You read the briefing packet on me.?”

“I may have skimmed it, sort of, the last page where I had to sign.”

“I’m dangerous.  You shouldn’t get too close or make any sudden moves around me.”

“What? Like you’re some sort of dinosaur?  And no disrespect, but the only thing in imminent danger seems to be Captain Crunch.”  She looks pointedly at where he’s clutching the cardboard of the box hard enough to have burst through the packaging.  Eyes rolling skyward asking for some patience he puts it back on the shelf and shuffles a few undamaged boxes to the front.

“Chill my dude and tell Darcy what’s the problem.  I’m good at this whole introduction to modern America, I managed to house train Thor for Jane, he hardly ever smashes his cups anymore.”

The image of Thor being smacked on the nose with a new paper and brought to heel by the tiny firecracker beside him makes him chuckle.

“See, you like me already!”  she chirps brightly.

“You’re mad.”  He tells her.

“All the best people are!  Now spill, what has the fearsome Winter Soldier all riled up?”

“Just want some cereal, nothing fancy.  There’s just too much and it’s all…“ He trails off, not sure how to explain his need for something familiar in all the chaos or brightly packaged breakfast goods.

Darcy bends down and grabs a plain white package and hold it’s out to him.

“I figure you’re the sweet and simple type, nothing has changed about the humble cornflake in a century.”

“Thanks, Doll.”  He takes it with relief, something he recognised at least and together they make their way to the checkout.

Being the gentleman he is he offers to carry the five bags she comes out of the store with and she happily agrees, hooking her hand in his elbow companionably as they make their way back.

It was an interesting beginning.

------------------------------------------------------------

“You got the list?”  She’d called him just as he stepped out of the door.

“Got it.”

“Did you remember to take Sam off the list?”  He winces and presses the button for the elevator.

“Sam wasn’t on the list.”

“That’s just mean…”  the lack of sincerity in her tone is comforting.  She and Sam got on about as well as he and Sam, that is to say not at all.  She had Sam running in circles most days trying to work out why shit kept happening to him.  Darcy had Jarvis in her pocket and could count on him for technical support.

“Told you not to get him anything, he’s menace.”

“I ordered him a Make Your Own Cheese kit.”  Bucky draws a blank, make your own cheese?

“What the hell is he gonna do with that?”

“Keep up Tin-man, he’ll make cheese.  Publicly.  In the common kitchen and everyone gets to watch him fail or triumph.  I will be judging the shit out of it.”

He grins at the thought of Darcy winding Sam up with comments while he tries to cook.

“S’not a bad idea.”  The evelvator finally reaches the lobby and he steps out just as she cannon balls into him.  He grins down at her and pockets his phone before kissing her nose.

“Ready to go?”

“Am I ever, we are going to kick Christmas shopping’s ass and be home in time for dinner.”

“Okay, remember the plan?”

“Look as innocent and helpless as possible where appropriate and when not, let you do the not talking till they let us past.”

“You run into trouble, no starting a fight, you’re not allowed to taser people in New York, not even for being assholes.”

“Stupid laws…“  She mutters as he wraps an arm around her waist, guiding her out onto the street, it’s interesting to note that his presence has the desired effect she was looking for, there was a bubble of space around them at least three feet wide.

“I hate the crowds but the best deals are to be had out there and you my glorious Winter Shopper are going to be the best bodyguard/bag carrier I’ve ever had.  Now on a more serious matter, what does Bucky Barnes want for Christmas?”

“All I want for Christmas is you, Doll.”

“You keep saying that I’m going think you mean it.”

“What if I do?”

“Don’t be surprised at me showing up wearing nothing but a bow.”

He nearly runs into a lamp post and she pulls him out of the way just in time.

It’s the way she says it, both cheeky and with a touch of vulnerability that shakes his world.  They’d been friends for a while now, he’d certainly not missed how pretty she was and if this had been before he’d have had her in his bed months ago.  They stop in the middle of the busy street and she tips her head up to look him right in the eye, waiting for him to say something.  His hands cup her elbows and she holds her breath.

It’s like he’s at some fork in the road, two choices in front of him, the one he knows and the one less traveled.  He tucks a lock of hair behind her ear and leans down till his lips graze the tip of it.

“Don’t mind how you wrap yourself up doll, just make sure the bow’s red.”

The way her eyes widen and the blush creeps up her cheeks he’d caught her off guard.  Then it’s his turn as she grabs him by the collar and pulls him into a kiss.  It’s the kiss that changes his life, on a snowy sidewalk in Manhattan.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

They’d been in the store for what felt like week and there didn’t seem to be an end in sight.  He’s sure in fact, that where they are, is Swedish Hell.  He groans as she tosses another throw and a set of cushions into the trolley he’s pushing.

“Hey, Bucky, what’s left on the list?”

He digs around under some dishes and a set of towels and pulls out the neon pink paper and hands it to her.

“Hmm… looks like we have almost everything, just one more and then we can go”

“Jesus Doll, don’t we have enough already?”

“We need a bed Bucky, we did not think this whole thing through with the new apartment.  Come on, it’ll be fun.  You can test em out till we find the right one!”

Growling under his breath he pinches her side, sending her jumping a mile, right into a security guard that gives her a look for about point five seconds before his glare falls to Bucky who sends his best murder grin.  It’s the guard that apologises to Darcy then and he retreats quickly as she cackles with glee.

It takes them another two hours to find a bed they both like and agree should hold up okay even with his strength and her need to occasionally jump on it.

It’s lying side by side in Ikea that it happens.  One small moment that they can never get back again, a first that came from nowhere.

She’s peering over a pillow at him as they lie on the bed they’ve chosen, he can’t remember now what it was she said that made him laugh, but he remembers her shit eating grin and the way he wiped it off her face with the sort of kiss they usually reserved for the bedroom, but that’s when he says it.

“love you Darcy-girl.”  Her smile lights up the world.

“l love you too babe.”

They’re like a couple of teenagers going through the checkout, whispering and holding hands and kissing.  The cashier gives them an indulgent look and slips a wedding registry booklet into the bag as she helps pack them up.

That night they make love on top of his old mattress on the floor of their new apartment, still high on the declaration of new love.  

“How much do you love me Doll?”

“I love you all the muches and with much muchness.”  She tells him seriously as he kisses her slowly, hands trailing over her skin, mapping all the places he intends to kiss while she sighs into his mouth in happy languor.  Lying there in the dark later, he thinks about the wedding registry and pulls her closer.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

The list pinned to the fridge also has a plastic bag attached.  At first he doesn’t think anything of it, he’s always happy to go to the store with her so when she texts him to bring the list from the fridge he’s on auto pilot as he grabs it, catching the clear bag in his metal hand as it drops when he tugs the list free.

The double take he then does at the item within makes him feel like the world just tipped sideways for a second.  He stares at the plastic wand in the bag, vaguely recognising it for what it is.  If the two pink lines don’t confirm it, the list she’d asked him to pick up does.

Crib

Changing table

Cloth nappies

Bugaboo stroller

Car seat

Onesies

Sling

It takes him four minutes to get down to the lab where she’s waiting for him, near sick with worry at what his reaction might be.  They hadn’t talked about it, never even thought about it, they’d only been married for six months.

He bursts into the lab and has her in his arms not a second later planting the teariest kiss he’s ever given her on her.

“We’re having a baby.”

“Yeah, we are.”

“Your gonna be the best Ma a kid ever had sweetheart.”

“Shut up and don’t call me sweetheart…  I know you’re gonna be the best dad ever Bucky Barnes”

“We’re having a baby.”

“We’re having a baby.”

It’s the happiest day of his life.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Mr Barnes…   Mr Barnes?”

“Sorry, what was that?”

“Ahh… well if you could choose from the cherry or the mahogany…”  The woman trailed off and tilted the catalogue towards him again.  He flicked a quick eye over the page and scrubbed a hand over his face.

Briefly the thought that Darcy would know what to choose drifted by in his brain.  What a fuckin joke.

“Bucky?”  Steve’s voice was overly cautious and placating.  He really wanted to just punch him in the face.

“M’not make of glass pal.”  The tone was weary and bitter.

“Cherry.”  He tells her shortly and then manages to get through the rest of the choices without Steve making another noise.

Out in the street he lights a cigarette and inhales a deep draw.

“I’ll walk back.”  He tells Steve as the town car draws up.  “Alone.”  He reinforces the order with a brief shove of his friend toward the car.

He walks there unconsciously, or maybe consciously, he really isn’t sure.   There’s nothing very different about the place.  The police tape and the glass had been cleared up and replaced.  The grocery store looks just as it always has.

It was stupid.  The whole thing was stupid.  She’d only popped out to get milk.  He hadn’t even been there. He’d been upstate when it happened.  Training the new recruits for Hill.

When he’d reached the scene her body had already been moved to the morgue.   Some punk kid, high, looking for some easy cash had robbed the store.   She’d been at the checkout with the milk, minding her own damn business but some hero type had tried to stop the kid and the gun went off.  

He’d seen her body, the bullet had went straight through her heart.  From all accounts she’d been dead before she even hit the floor.  By the time the paramedics got there it had been too late to try resuscitating her or even to save the baby.  A daughter, they’d told him when they brought him in to view the body.  Tiny and perfect and beautiful, just like her Ma.

He stands there, looking through the window and remembers her handing him a box of cereal.  It ended where it began, in a store on the corner of East 42nd and Lexington.  His fingers fold around the list in his pocket and he draws it out to look at it again like had had a few dozen times since he took it down off the fridge.

Crib

Changing table

Cloth nappies

Bugaboo stroller

Car seat

Onesies

Sling

He holds the burning end of the cigarette to the corner and watches as the paper turns to ash, then he turns and walks away.  Away from the Tower and away from the life he’d been stupid enough to think he had.  He’s going home.

NEXT

SKIP TO FIX IT

@captain-rogers-beard