His escort was more than I could have ever asked for. The streets were lined with people whose lives my Andrew touched. I clung to his casket with our other siblings and told him over and over how much I love him. Every officer that worked with him lined the entrance for my family. My sweet sweet Doodoo made everyone who ever met him, love him instantly and that fact was made abundantly clear today. His services are Friday before his cremation and I can't even imagine the amount of people that will be there for my Doodoo. I feel like I'm walking around in a million pieces. But he would hate me crying over him, he would want me to joke and laugh at his expense. He would tell me to stop being such a pussy, it's chin up time and I can do this because I have to. I have to for my boys and for my mom and dad and because he fucking said so that's why. He was the best of all of us, he was my strength and my rational mind and every ounce of idgaf. He was my sweet doodoo, my goober, my scoob, my doo-butt, my sweet sweet Andrew. He was the man who cried with an old woman who just lost her husband when he was a cart boy at Menards. He held me up when our grandma's died. He held me through my divorce. He held me together our entire lives. He was my little-big brother, my protector, my back-up if I ever needed it. He was a good man and he deserved a full life. 27 years is not enough, so I will live my life the way I know you would have wanted me to me sweet sweet Drew. I will keep living for you because I know it's what you would want from me. As your big sister I was always ready to go first, but since you beat me to it, I will keep going for you, my Andrew. I will raise your nephews to be the same kind of man that you were. I will live the rest of my life making you proud, I promise.
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I THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAAD!!11111!!!!!! but you are not. evidently because here yyou are in front of me livining and breaathing. life has been slow without you. you are like the sun but if the sun was my best friend because you are one of the best things that has ever happened to me. being around you is like breathing fresh air after breathing smoke for years and years. when i think of you i see an angel descending from heaven coming down to save me because after all these years you have stayed with me and if you ever left i think i would shrivel up and die because. i need you around me like i nned water likei need the air i breathe. i miss you every day i don't see you and these past months i feel like weare on opposite sides of a bridge and i cant quite reach you. youre like a frosty winter morining when the sky is blue and clear and the sun is so beautiful and bright as it rises and the mist is rising from the earth in a soft white halo and everything quiet and gentle and beautiful reminds me of you like the tide coming in like the birds calling in the trees like the sstars that glitter in the sky. unbelievably beautiful and precious and worth looking at and being around and so so so unbelievably
if a time ever comes in my life that you are not in i can imagine a dark cloud lingering over me and youonly you could pull it away i love you i love you i love you so much the words themselves can't describe the depths i would go the heights i would climb the things i would do for you. youre as constant as the earth as gentle as a breeze as wonderful as a rainbow in the sky. i cant picture my life without you in it i want to live with you i want to see the world with you i want to cry with you i want to try everything and you to be there with me for me i want to grow old with you and for us to stare at the sunset in our twin rocking chairs and reminisce of the days we were young and free and i want to
i really really love you and i don't know if ive ever loved anyone like this but i want to hold on and never let go.
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Alright, let's talk about Colin's entrapment line and why Penelope offering an annulment was significant, shall we? Arguably the most controversial part of this season, isn't it?
I'm not going to delve too long on the entrapment line again actually, but to summarise, Colin has been traumatised by a similar situation before, and right now, he's hurt. And the thing about being angry with your best friend is that you know what to say to hurt them the most. We see it in Eloise's and Penelope's fight, as they threw each other's insecurities in the other's faces. Colin, two episodes ago, was defending Penelope against Portia, who was accusing her of entrapping him, so yes, his mind will jump to that first. But also note that the whole time he refuses to look at her, because he knows his words are cutting and will hurt and he knows his resolve would break if he looked at her, which is contrasted by Penelope directly looking at him to tell him she loves him and did not mean for this to happen like this. He does not look because he knows she loves him, this is not Marina's situation exactly who only wanted a way out and did not see him as much else than a means to an end, and that's why it's so much more difficult to deal with for him. Penelope loves him.
And he's already almost lost her once, as angry and hurt as he is, he cannot fathom the idea of letting her go, when he remembers how empty he felt without her letters, or at the idea of her with Debling. So he's still here, determined to marry her.
So now we get to e8. The marriage was not technically consummated, and the Lady Whistledown business is finally settled. So Penelope offers the annulment, to set him, and his family, free from her mess.
They never directly address Colin's entrapment comment again, but with Penelope offering the annulment, it is now implied she's been thinking about this the whole time. It is a very real possibility that by that point, Penelope already knew she was pregnant, and it's been speculated if she told Colin in that scene after Francesca's wedding or not (I personally don't think she did, to not add to his guilt at that moment, and perhaps to not influence his decision, knowing she would be offering the annulment soon) and it parallels Marina's situation again, except in this case, Penelope does not wish to trap Colin with a baby, even if it is his. She knows how much Marina impacted Colin, and does not wish to do the same thing she had prevented Marina to do. The best part about this though? Colin is stunned (Edit: I changed the adjective here as someone rightfully pointed out I was exaggerating by saying "flabbergasted" when his reaction is more on the subtle side the English language is the bane of my existence). Frankly, he probably forgot he even said that, the same way he forgot about his "I would never dream of courting Penelope Featherington" comment - those were words said in the heat of the moment he never actually believed. Not once has Colin thought of either breaking the engagement, or get an annulment even after the betrayal.
He could have still eloped with Marina even after learning the truth, but he didn't because she was not honest with him from the start. He learns Penelope has been living a double life this whole time, and yet he stays.
It is significant that Penelope listened and acknowledged Colin's point of view, the same way she asked him to simply stand by her side and support her. Also note that she never says "our family", she says "you or your family".
Despite already being married, this whole time, it did not feel like they were, and she knew that as long as there was still this barrier between them, she could never truly be part of that family, but it's alright, she could live with that, she has mended things with her own after all, and she can support herself. Whatever the outcome, she'll be alright, she believes.
Fortunately for her, she does not get to find out what that future would entail because Colin absolutely hates the idea of letting her go.
Because after all, she's a mess, but she's his mess.
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I’ll be responding to messages and posts as I get time, but I just need you all to know I appreciate you so fucking much. Every last one of you incredible supporters — you hold my heart in your hands. Sincerely, you are the most impeccably wondrous people. I have the support system of the millennium.
Anyway, you, supporters, are actually the very reason I haven’t responded to the messages and encouraging posts of love and defense sooner.
I haven’t been on here because I have been busting my ass to bring you Chapter 11 AND Chapter 12! My goal is to have them both done so I can drop them within a few days of each other. It is past time for me to bring this story back to you and I’m beyond ready to continue sharing it.
My goal is to have it to you sooner than you might imagine. I don’t blame you if you don’t believe me, but I promise my goal as of now is to have it to you in days’ time. Not weeks. Not months. Days. 🫶🏻
So. . . In the meantime, how about a sneak peek?
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Rat Dad of the Year 1988, or something along those lines. Anyway *gives him cute round rat ears instead of funny pointy little dog ears like they did in 2003 for some reason*
Image ID under the readmore
[A series of three images. In the first image, Splinter, smiling, gently holds one of his turtle sons in his arms with their head tucked under his chin. One hand is on the turtle’s shell, the other rests on their head. The drawing is sketched in a soft gray color, and there is a tiny pink heart next to Splinter
In the second image, there are two separate sketches. One is a bust portrait of Splinter set at a 3/4 angle. His ears a tilted back slightly and his expression is neutral. The second is a small doodle of Splinter licking the cheek of a young toddler-aged Leonardo. Leo is making a “Bwuh!” noise in protest, and there is a small sound effect caption of “mlep mlep” to describe the sound of Splinter grooming his son
In the third image a young turtle tot, perhaps four to five years old, is standing facing to the left, sketched in green. One hand is held over his chest and there are tears on his cheeks as he says “Mas’er Splin’r I hadda bad dream. Can I stay wif you?”
End image ID]
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thinking of the similarities between rio and miles again. their awkward smiles are the same and they both kind of hunch in on themselves when put on the spot/nervous, and both try to diffuse that air with a joke/playful phrase. how similar do you think Miles G. and Rio-42 act? do you think they have super similar upset behaviors?? do you think they’re just more alike in general ever since jeff passed away??? or has Miles G. been getting distant bc of grief despite loving his mom so much and needing her so he acts more like Aaron than anyone else?? i’m so sick
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