#i may write more drabbles

[blaackbiird]

personally I don't think people lean enough into the fact that Lucifer could fucking demolish Alastor without breaking a sweat. There's too many fics where Alastor's threats scare Lucifer and like what??

I love their antagonistic relationship. I love the idea of their rivalry, of them needling each other and pushing each other to break composure. I love the idea that Lucifer is emotional and easily annoyed/pissed off and Alastor loves playing off that.

But if Alastor ever genuinely threatened Lucifer? There's no way Lucifer would take that seriously, or lying down. Of course he'd put Alastor in his place if he ever actually needed to.

I need more fics of Alastor attempting to threaten Lucifer, or pushing Lucifer too far, and then learning exactly why he's the king of Hell.

[siltyriver]

𝐃𝐏𝐱𝐃𝐂 𝐃𝐞𝐚𝐝 𝐨𝐧 𝐌𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐃𝐫𝐚𝐛𝐛𝐥𝐞/𝐖𝐈𝐏 — ‘𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐟𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬’ ᴘᴛ. 2

part 1

“Hey- wha- Danny!” Jason yelled in panic and jerked forward, hands on the ledge to look down and body ready to vault after his idiot as quickly as he could, but was stopped by a familiar cackle, a sudden burst of light, and Danny himself standing, no floating, in front of him with stark white hair and green eyes that were quite literally glowing.

What the fuck.

“What the fuck,” he parroted his thoughts. His lips still tingled from where Danny had pressed his own against them and it was all together enough to make his brain short circuit.

“Yeah, so, uh, hi?” Danny waved lamely which turned into even lamer jazz hands, “Surprise?”

Jason blinked. And blinked again. “What the fuck,” he repeated again, this time with feeling. Danny winced a little and launched into an explanation.

“So, you know I died? Well, apparently while I was dying my DNA was also being infused with, like, a shit ton of ectoplasm which made sure I didn’t all the way die but I also didn’t come all the way back and ended up as half-ghost half-living — halfa is actually the term we use, but that’s not super important right now —” his words were nearly blending together with how fast he was trying to explain, “And, oh! I can transform at will and have been fighting ghosts since I was fourteen because they come through the same portal that I well, you know, died in, and I may also have some super cool powers and technically be King-to-Be of the Infinite Realms because I beat the last King in combat and inherited the throne, sooooo,” Danny finally stopped his word vomit. “Questions?” He finished meekly.

Jason stared and stared before tilting his head back and groaning. “Of fucking course my boyfriend would be a fucking ghost king. I am never going to live this down.” He scrubbed a hand down his face and turned to see Danny grinning lopsidedly at him. “What now?” He asked warily, suddenly feeling like a long nap would do him wonders and, really, the concrete roof was absolutely not the worst place he’d slept on before, so maybe it wouldn’t be such a bad idea—

Danny floated closer and Jason’s attention was stolen by the fact that his legs had transformed into a trail of… mist? Gas? What were ghosts even made of? Jason didn’t know but the sight was disconcerting and a little more than a bit distracting, especially paired with the skin-tight suit that had taken place of Danny’s usual baggier clothing. He took it all in with fascination and still a hint of disbelief.

“Boyfriend, huh?”

His eyes shot back up to Danny’s green ones and he flushed a bit at how close he had gotten without Jason noticing. He pinched his lips together when the question sunk in.

Well, in for a penny and all that.

Danny’s grin widened even more but Jason didn’t give him the time nor satisfaction to say something witty; he gave into his desires and cupped Danny’s face, noting both how strange it was to not have to lean down whatsoever to look Danny in the eyes (since he was still, y’know, floating) and how cold his skin was (Danny had always ran cold, but this was different, like the complete absence of any underlying heat that blood and skin produced).

Danny’s grin morphed into something softer and surprised, as if Jason had caught him off guard. Good. See how he likes it.

“Yes,” Jason stated, voice a bit gruff but soft between them, and Danny’s eyes darted back to his own from where they had been staring at Jason’s lips. Score. “Boyfriend,” and then, because he was a gentleman, thank you very much: “Only if you want, of cour—“ Jason was cut off by another press of lips on his own, only this time he was prepared and held on tighter, not letting Danny pull back as quickly.

Their lips stayed pressed together, soft and gentle and it made Jason ache with something fierce. He wasn’t used to tenderness. He wasn’t used to getting what he wanted. He wasn’t used to anyone wanting him back.

When they finally pulled away it was only to lean their foreheads against each other. Danny let out a breathless laugh and nudged his nose against Jason’s in a way that made his stomach flip at the casual affection. “Yes,” Danny said with another quick peck to Jason’s lips, “Boyfriends.”

Jason couldn’t stop the small, crooked grin if he had even wanted to try (and he really, really didn’t). It had been a long time since he had felt this good. This happy. Sure, he’d gotten a lot better in the past couple of years since he came back full of boiling green rage and the itch for violence at his fingertips, but Danny was the one to make him want to be better. Jason finally wanted to come back to himself, to allow himself the grace to forgive and be forgiven and move towards a future that wasn’t bathed in blood and tainted by the Pit Rage. He wanted a better relationship with his family. He wanted to do his city proud. And he wanted Danny by his side through it all, apparent Kingly status and everything.

“Good,” Jason said, drinking in the sight of Danny’s own giddy grin that showed off the longer and more pointed canines that Jason was definitely not imagining dragging along his skin. No siree. He shuddered, and it was definitely from the cold that Danny radiated. Nothing else.

Danny seemingly felt the shiver and pulled back a little more and with a flash of light he was back to his messy black hair and blue eyes, standing on the ledge with his arms around Jason’s shoulders much like they were before he had tried to give Jason a heart attack earlier. The temperature warmed a few degrees and Jason noted the fact to ask about later. “Good,” Danny parroted and then let out a little sigh, “Though, we really do need to talk about this so you actually know what you’re getting into. There’s… there’s a lot I need to explain.”

Jason nodded in agreement. He couldn’t imagine that anything Danny had to tell him would change the way he felt, but he would very much like to know everything. “My place or yours?”

Danny grinned mischeivously, “What, not the Batcave? The sooner I disclose my identity to all your bats the less chance of me slipping that I know and being hunted for sport, right? Plus, I think I could use Batman and Red Robin’s help on a couple of things assuming they’re amenable.”

Jason shook his head immediately, not wanting to imagine how the conversation would go with his entire family there to harass them without them being a hundred percent prepared (and very curious about what exactly Danny could need Bruce and Tim’s help with).

“Absolutely not. I’m not letting that conversation happen with you there until I know they can all behave themselves and not be asses about it. Jason was especially worried about Bruce’s reaction considering the man’s trust issues and his invasive need to pry and leave no stone left unturned. His siblings would be nosy and insufferable with their teasing but at least Jason was used to their antics and could shield Danny from the worst of it by giving them the short rundown before the full question panel had to happen. No, better for Jason to learn it all first and be able to prepare them both for the inevitable shitshow.

Danny shrugged, “Probably best to go to my place anyway; I stole a bunch of tech from my parents and it’s way easier to explain everything with some visual examples.”

Jason arched a brow, “What kind of tech?”

Danny’s grin was down right devilish as he transformed once more with a flash of light and held out an inviting hand as he floated a few feet away from the ledge, “How do you feel about going ghost hunting?”

Jason had a sudden feeling that Danny was going to be the death of him, but, strangley, the thought wasn’t nearly as frightening as it should have been. Maybe Danny was onto something when he said dying once really put things into persepctive. After all, there were much worse ways to go.

He confidently stepped onto the ledge and grabbed the offered hand tightly, “Bring it on, Ghost King.”

[ancha-aus]

RealAgeAU - Doctor Visit

*whispers* pppssssttt @spotaus the next one is here :3

First Drabble Prev Drabble Next Drabble

We do have a warning for this one though, as it will refer child abuse, mental and physical. And wounds and what comes with it.

I am not going to make it graphic but if it bothers you please be careful with reading :)

Otherwise no beta or edits. I write these in one go and just let them live :D

Fun fact, this was originally going to be a Dust pov chapter but I realised that Ngihtmare pov would be more interesting! Also fun fact!! This was suposed to be a lot shorter but then i got typing and i realised some characters were not going to accept certain things without a good explanation and well... here we are.... i regret nothing.

*-------------------*

Nightmare pulls on his shirt as he looks down at it.

Cross hums "Nervous?"

Ngihtmare huffs and shrugs. Yes. but he doesn't want to say so.

Cross gently rubs his spine through the shirt "Yeah I get it. I never liked my health backups either."

Nightmare frowns but feels a bit less stupid about not wanting this health check. It is just stupid! His four... his four already check his old wounds! There is a reason they don't let him bath alone.

Nightmare finally finds the right words and mutters "It is just... not needed... You guys check them."

Cross is silent before Nightmare yelps as he is picked up easily. He shoots Cross a glare but Cross just keeps smiling and hugs him close with a purr "We get it Night. But we are worried too. We need to make sure that everything really is healing as we think it is. None of us are medical professionals." Cross smiles at him "please?"

Nightmare shrugs as he leans into the hold. It is nice. comfortable and warm. He hadn't realised how much he had missed hugs and being held. Last time anyone wanted to hug him this much was when he still lived with Dream and even Dream's hugs had been short or more of just leaning. His four just, hold him for as long as they like. Which can go on for the whole day.

It is nice.

Cross nuzzles his skull "And you won't be alone. Dust will be with you the whole time."

Nightmare nods. He ahd asked the day before why just Dust. Dust had explained they had agreed it would be for the best to just have one of them there to keep an eye on it. Killer hadn't wanted to get attention on him because of his soul and Horror had had much the same reason. His skull may look like a mess but it is very stable. Neither had wanted to take the focus away from Nightmare as he, according to them, needed it most.

And with Cross now again admitting health checks make him nervous. It is no wonder it would be Dust.

Nightmare gives a slow nod "true..." and you can't remove Dust unless he wants to be removed. Nightmare had known that since he first met the other skeleton.

Cross nods and smiles "See? Perfectly okay." he stands up and Nightmare gets lifted wiht him. Nightmare for his part just grabs hold on Cross's shirt to stay steady as they leave their attic.

The week they had been here is honestly amazing. Nightmare gets to relax more and read his book on the couch. At elast one of them is always nearby.

It is still weird that Crop, and his brother Straw, are so... nice. Nightmare isn't used to others being nice to him.

It is weird.

He can accept it from his four. But that is different, they are different. They are special and actually care, that is why they are nice and came back to him... for him.

Nightmare leans against Cross as they get downstairs. Dust and Horror are discussing things as Killer sits by the window staring outside.

Cross grins at the others "All clean and ready ti mingle!" Cross easily walks over to Dust and Nightmare feels himself be handed over to the other skeleton.

Nightmare can feel the difference between their holds and feels the other magic near. It is nice and familiar nad Nightmare just leans agaisnt Dust.

Dust leans close and nuzzles him "You okay? We can still call it off." Cross shoots Dust a disapproving look but Dust ignores him.

Nightmare is appreciates it but shakes his skull "It is fine. It is needed..." He huffs and crosses his arms as he looks to the side "It is just stupid." he doesnt want to do this.

Dust nods "Needed things often are stupid. It is honestly a terrible system." and another nuzzle and Ngihtmare feels a bit better.

Crop, who had been watching from the kitchen, walks over "so... who is gonna go the talking? Do you all want to be there?" and he waits.

Killer doens't look away from the window but answers "Dusty will stay with Nightmare throuhg it all. We will stay in the living room."

Crop nods "Right right." he looks a bit more nervous "You got a story straight?"

Ngihtmare huffs and mutters against Dust's shoulder "There is nothing straight about that story."

Dust freezes before snorting and trying to smother his laughing. Horror, who had been close enough to hear too, grins widely.

Cross and Killer btoh turn to them confused, same for Crop.

Dust snorts and shrugs but Horror answers "We spoke about it before hand." and Horror shoots Dust a look.

Dust looks actively pained "Yes we spoke about it."

Cross smiles at Crop's worried look "it is fine! Dust is great at this stuff. He won't share everything of what happened but will tell the healer enough to really sell it and get rumours flowing."

Ngihtmare nods and feels... happy? Pride? he isn't sure but he always knew his four were special and amazing and this just proves it again.

Crop blinks and nods "okay. As long as that is the case... She should be here any moment. She is the head doctor and head healer in our town and anything in her clinic goes through her. She is really nice and just wants to help though so no worries okay?" and he grins.

Nightmare is once again reminded of what is coming and feels hismelf grow more tense as he turns slightly to be clsoer to Dust. Dust just holds him closer and nuzzles him. Dust doesn't say anyhting but it still helps. it feels nice... it is safe.

Crop looks troubled but before he can say anything Killer turns sharply to the window again "Car just stopped. a deer monster got out." and he glances at Crop.

Crop smiles and rushes to the door "That is her. euh. just act-" he turns but before he can say anything Dust and Ngihtmare are already on the couch, Nightmare is still in his lap and has a book in his hands. Nightmare cna spot Killer by the table wiht some playing cards, already having a few made to form a house of cards. Cross is by the tv playing around with the channels as Horror sets water up for tea.

Crop blinks as he softly mutters the rest of his sentence "-act natural..." moments later a knock on the door.

Ngihtmare pushes closer to Dust and Dust takes the book from his shaking hands and starts reading it out loud.

Crop opens the door and Nightmare can't even focus on the calm voice of Dust or the fact the others are around. as Killer had said, the doctor is a deer monster of some kind. she has rather impressive antlers for her kind as she greets Crop with a familiarity.

Crop turns to the room and grins "Guys. This is Fauna. She is the head doctor in town and she is nice and very profesional!" and he waits.

Nightmare watches as Killer huffs as he looks her up and down "... I see." he walks over to Dust and Nightmare and Nightmare suddenly gets another skull nuzzling him.

Dust chuckles as he calmly puts the book away "Careful Kills, he just had a bath and your goop tends to stick."

Killer pouts at him "kill joy."

Nightmare blinks between them as he lounges against Dust. He glances back and sees a soft smile on Fauna's face. Ah. Right. make sure to show what you want them to see.

Dust looks up at Fauna and nods "I will be staying with him through his checkup." it is an announcement.

Fauna smiles and crosses her arms "oh really? I am sure we will discuss that." she looks at Crop "Where can we have this conversation and checkup?"

Crop smiles "The kitchen! come this way." and Crop leads Fauna there.

Dust rises to his feet and Nightmare cna see both Cross and Killer shoot him nervous glances.

Dust just huffs "I got this." and walks towards the kitchen. Just in time to see Horror pour some mugs of tea and setting two aside.

Horror looks at Dust "Chamomile and lemon." He smiles at Nightmare and points to the other "Lavender and peach." he nods to Crop and Fauna and silently leaves the kitchen.

Dust takes a seat before taking a sip of his own tea. Nightmare grabs his own mug and sips it. It is nice, easily with the intent Horror put into it when he made it. It helps him relax.

Crop grabs a mug for Fauna and Fauna quickly makes her own tea. Then she gives Crop a very pointed look "I know this is your house but just because you are now technically their landlord does not mean you are allowed to have this information. out you go."

Crop doesn't fight it at all "Of course. you know your way around." he grins at Dust and Nightmare "Take it easy okay?" and he leaves.

A long silence in the room.

Fauna takes asip from her own tea and looks at Dust critically "Now. Before we start I have to ask you two a few questions. Foremost and before anything else. I am here for the wellbeing of that child." she smiles at him "That is my goal." she gives Dust a colder look "Understood?"

Dust raises a brow "That is fine." then slower "However. Before we answers any questions I have one very important one for you. What are your privacy policies?" Dust nudges Ngihtmare and Nightmare is quick to take another sip, it helps to calm his shaking a bit.

Dust stares Fauna down easily "Just like you want to make sure he is okay. we just want him safe. If you are a risk to that safety we will not answer anything."

Fauna glares but nods "Insulting to be questioned like that but understanding. When I took this profesion I took a few oaths. One, to always help those in need no matter who they are. Two, to always put the health of my patient first. Three, to never disclose private matters of a patient to other people." she turns her spoon in her mug "I take these oaths very seriously. You can't help people if you are not trustworthy."

Dust rolls his eyes "Of course you took oaths. I mean who will get access to this information? You knowing it is one thing. You making physical notes that someone else can read is another. We don't want... certain people to have access to information about him." and Nightmare feels Dust hug him closer.

Obviously not a lie. They have always been careful with another about his situation geting known to other people. But that is multiverse level. And unless they would visit this universe and ask the right people the chance of the stars finding this file are very low. But... for their backstory? It is crusial. Dust having been on the run with a babybones that had been stolen and he just stole back? That means this type of information is very dangerous to just lay around.

Fauna frowns and seems to make the conclusion that Dust wants her to make. Her voice gets a bit softer as she answers slowly "Patient files are under lock and key... however. I have a special case which only I can access where I keep the more sensitive information that only i know. If i have information that I deem to sensitive for others to hear I make sure to lock it away tightly." hse has a stubborn look "And no one knows where that is."

Ngihtmare considers it for only a moment and assumes it is in her inventory. Slightly high risk as if she were to dust that information would disappear forever and be lost forever. However, no one can force someone to take something out of their inventory.

Dust frowns and gives a slow nod "Ask your questions." then he looks at Nightmare and nuzzles his skull again "If you don't want to answer her you can say so okay?" Nightmare nods and waits.

Fauna stares at them for a moment longer ebfore smilign at Nightmare "Hello... before anythign else... Do you have a name you would be okay with me calling you and knowing you as?"

Ngihtamre thinks it over before answering "My name is Nightmare, miss."

Fauna smiles and writes it on a file she has pulled out of nowhere, see? Inventory.

Fauna nods and looks back at him "How would you like to refer to you? A boy? a girl? neither? both?"

Ngihtamre shrugs as he leans against Dust. "I prefer he... but anything is fine honestly..." an afterthought and he shoots Dust an uncertain look. Dust just gives him a nod. Nightmare looks at the table "Just... no 'it' please." there. He doesn't like that. He knows some monsters are fine with that but he isn't.

Fauna nods "Of course." she smiles "Nightmare. That is not a name i hear often. Did you pick it yourself or was it given to you?"

Ngihtmare holds tighter unto Dust and mutters "Given."

Fauna nods again before smiling "by who?"

Nightmare freezes and turns to Dust for a moment. dust just nuzzles him "Your choice."

meaning he will figure out their story and edit it if he needs to. Ngihtmare feels bad about the idea of not telling his name for given by Nim... she had been his mother! yet... yet...

yet...

Nightmare shrugs as he leans against Dust "What everyone always said i was..." not a lie.

DUst frowns and holds him closer. Fauna frowns as well "Are you sure then you want to be called tht then?"

Ngihtmae nods and spekas with more confidence "fits fine wtih everyone." and more importantly "it is my name." his. Even if everyone always made it out to be something bad. It was his!

Fauna blinks before smiling "Yeah. your name is the first thing that is truely yours. and so that means it is your choice what you do with it." she notes down the name and looks at them "no family name?"

Ngihtmare shakes his skull and looks at Dust and waits.

Dust shrugs "never needed one."

Fauna chuckles nad nods "I can imagine that your names aren't in the list of most popular babynames. This will work just fine for now." she looks back at him "now nightmare. a very important question. Are you really okay wiht Dust being here for your examination?"

Nightmare is alreayd nodding and holds unto Dust tighter. Dust hugs him "I am not leaving unless he tells me to leave."

Fauna nods, not at all btohered by the glare Dust sends her way "of course. Is it okay for Dust to then be noted down as someone who is allowed to know your medical records and information?"

Nightmare nods nad pauses for a moment "So are the others."

Fauna raises her pen and waits.

Nightmare rolls his eye lights "Killer, Horror and Cross. They cna all know as well. They know things." everything he is willing to share that is.

Dust raises a brow "are you done yet with your interrogation? I thought this was suposed to be about how he is doing."

Fauna hums and looks unbothered as she updates the file "I want to be sure that I know who i can share what with." she looks at Dsut "privacy policies."

Dust looks beyond annoyed and huffs before his face goes back to being calm and bored looking.

Fauna nods and looks at Nightmare "Now. We will start easy. an examination can be a lot and with what Crop told me he knew it makes me worried about your health. we will go as far as you feel comfortable with. I will start with asking soem questions, ease you in. okay?" and she waits with a gentle smile.

Ngihtamre thinks it over before nodding.

Fauna nods again as she grabs a list "Does anything hurt?"

Nightmare rolls his eye lights and nods. Duh. He is healing.

She immediantly frowns and pulls out a shard with frowning faces "now... which face would show you how you feel about this pain?"

Ngihtmare knows he is pulling a face as Dust chuckles. Nightmare looks unimpressed at Fauna "It hurts a lot. I would say a ten when it happened. about an eight on days it hurts more and about a six otherwise."

She stares in shock and Dsut shrugs "the.... people.. he was stuck with... did not treat him as a child... we are still working on that." and he looks at Nightmare but Dust can see the pride and amusement.

Fauna frowns but makes careful notes "okay... can you explain to me what hurts? in your words."

Ngihtamre waits a moment before speaking "ribs... always... spine aches easily. legs normally don't hurt unless i walk a lot... skull doesn't hurt unless i use do magic. arms also always hurt but not as bad..." he tries to think what else but then shrugs.

Fauna however looks horrified and moves closer but she immediantly stops. Nightmare only realises later that the second she moved he flinched back and fully against Dust.

Fauna nods "okay.... That is very serious. You say using your magic also harms you?"

Ngihtmare nods slowly "not like... eating and stuff... or lighting up my eyes... but bigger things... spell stuff." it sucks but luckily the balance doens't need him anymore. He hadn't flet any new calling and figures he has time.

Fauna nods and frowns at Dust and Nightmare both "crop mentioned that there had been magic at play. somekind of shielding?"

Nightmare looks helplessly at Dust. he had no idea how to explain that!

Dust nods to nightmare before looking at Fauna "if you don't mind i will answer that." Fauna nods and Dust continues "We aren't quite sure of the details. we never saw the magic or studied the spell up close. We think he got into contact with something very powerful, probably with old magic. maybe an artifect. We never actually saw what it was. But it formed a sort of shield or bubble. It enclosed him, his soul and magic. but eventually it warn off and Nightmare appeared again. I saw him reappear and after some confusion on our end we got to work to get Nightmare back with us for safety..."

Fauna nods "You have seen this bubble or shielding?"

Dust nods "I have, it left Nightmare completely unrecognizeable from who he truly was. You wouldn't even be able to guess he was in there..."

Fauna frowns heavily as she makes notes "That may have impacted his magical growth and development, which may also be part of the reason shy using complex magic hurts him."

Nightmare stares at Dsut in shock. How had he just... made that up?! On the spot? It wasn't even a lie!

Dust sees him look and winks back wiht a grin before pulling his face back to the blank worried one of before.

Fauna nods as she sits up striaghter "okay. that is most of the verbal examination. I am very sorry but I really need to look at the physical wounds and your magic. I understand you have had very bad experiences with others who were suposed to keep your safe. Will you please allow me to see if i can help?"

Nightmare frowns as he thinks before answering "only wiht Dusty here." Dust will keep him safe. he can't keep himself safe but that is okay because Dust will.

Fauna nods "of course. Where would you like to start?"

Ngihtmare thinks before answering "magic and skull." that is easy to do together and as soon as he stops using his magic his skull will be healed again.

Dust pushes the chair they are sitting on a bit backwards and moves them around. Nightmare sits wiht his spine and back against Dust's front and he feels the slow and even soulbeat of him against his spine.

It helps calm his own racing soul.

Fauna sits in front of them. a reasonable amount of space between them.

Nightmare takes a deep breatha dn leans against Dust as he calls up his magic. It is still tought but a bit easier. It answers his call but it doesn't take any shape. It doesn't have a purpose. Nightmare tries to use it to feel the healer's general emotions and his head starts to ache.

He tells them as much and starts to feel what the lady is feeling. Worry, just so much worry and grief. Grief for him.

Ngihtmare doesn't get it. People don't like Nightmare. Ngihtmare is a bad omen and makes bad things happen. Why would she be worried for him? She doesn't even know him.

A loud gasp and even more worry and horrified feelings and Nightmare knows the cracks are visible.

Nightmare doesn't look at her but instead at the table. the light of his scars is bright enoguh to light up the room in a strange combination or purple and cyan.

Dust speaks softly "His own magic is purple... the cyan was from whatever the shielding bubble thing had been." a soft hand rubbing his shoulders. helping him relax.

Fauna swallows before speaking softly "Can I come closer and examine it?"

Nightmare answers himself "may as well... I managed to do it now anyway." it aches so badly "just... quickly please."

Dust mumbles "and carefully. This is very painful."

Fauna moves carefully and even a feather light touch causes agony as he shakes and a whimper escapes him.

Dust pulls him further back "Ngihtamre i think that is enough. can you dispell your magic again?"

His skull is swimming in pain and emotions not his own. He can't feel adn understand them on the same level anymore... can't sperate them from himself as easily anymore.

The light disappears and Nightmare just lays shaking in Dust's hold. Dust frowns at him and mutters "It got worse again..."

Ngihtamre looks away but nods. Dust just rubs his back and looks at Fauna "So yeah... pretty much all his magic still has that... cyan colour to it but as you saw it isn't helping him."

Fauna is writing quickly in her notes "It is almost an invasive magic on him. However it doesn't seem like he makes this cyan magic himself. I think it are still left overs but we would have to try and messure the two different forms of magic which is hard to do in the same person. those wounds..." and she looks at them.

Dust sighs "THe newest... wounds he got on... on his way out... on his way away from those he was with before... We always thought that whatever the magic was it saved him." again, no lies, just selective with the information and how he tells it.

Fauna taps the notes and nods "Well worrying. I think you are right on the magic having saved him. Especially as when he isn't using magic it isn't harming him. What i think that is happening is that the magic is keeping the head wounds close and whole. I think him trying to use his magic makes the cyan magic react as well, but as he can't make that it is pulled from whatever source he has. which in this cause is the very thing helping him." she nods and writes on another paper "For now. don't use any complex spells. only use very light and natural magic. things that don't bother or tire him. This way you can keep his own magic active and practise to help it grow stronger without disrupting the magic in his skull. If he at any moments starts to regularly have headaches we will need to look into somekind of magic transfer."

Dust frowns "why not do a transfer now?"

Fauna sighs "Magical transfers can be dangerous. if your soul doesn't accept the transfer you are suddenly without any magic in you. For children, especially those with very little magic themselves, it has an added risk of completely overwriting their own magic. meaning that their soul will only accept the new type of magic, but as the soul can't make this they will still have the same fate." she gives Dust a cold stare "this is not something done lightly."

Dust nods and mutters "We will keep an eye out for headaches." he give shim a look "any. headache."

Nightmare pouts and huffs at him "Okay. I will tell you."

Dust nods "good."he nudges their skulls together softly. "What next?"

nightmare frowns and sighs "ribs... it is the worst.. if that is okay the rest should be too." even if he hates losing his shirt and showing anyone the wounds and barely healed bones.

Dust nods and looks at fauna "Nightmare is going to have to sit with his back to you. You will need to announce any movement you make and keep making somekind of sound or noise."

Fauna accepts it easily and waits. Nightmare turns to sit towards Dust nad lets Dust help get him out of his loose shirt. Cross had specificlaly picked this one for today to make this easier. It is also why they skipped the bandages for today.

A loud gasp and Nightmare quickly hides his face in the bright red scarf.

Dust rubs the back or his skull "Yeah. we know. We try to get him to take a bath each day to clean the wounds out. He can bath himself but the wounds demand extra attention and care that he as a six year old just doesn't have the dexterity for." hearing Dust talk helps him calm down. he isn't alone. he isn't alone. he isn't alone.

Fauna swallows and speaks in a soft voice "I am going to sit a bit closer and take a closer look at some of your wounds near your spine." slow movements and Ngihtmare feels hismelf grow more tense. Fauna continues to talk "you are being very brave. thank you for trusting me, or at least trusting Dust enough to allow me to try and help you." she sits closer and Ngihtmare cna hear her breathing now. Fauna hums softly "Even if they look bad and still very hurt, which i know they do, they are very clean and seem to be healing well. YOu are all taking very good care of these breaks and missing chips."

Fauna shifts a tiny bit and Nightmare tightens his hold on Dust's hoody. Nightmare relaly likes the material that Dust wears. it is soft and makes it easy for him to sink his tiny claws into. Not let go.

Fauna speaks again "Mayb i touch the bones on your spine? I need to check how sensitive and hurt the still healthy bones are."

Nightmare takes a moment and nods before grabbing Dusts arm. DUst luckily understnads him "He will grip me if it hurts and i will tell you. is that okay?"

Fauna speaks with relieve "That is fine. Thank you for letting me examine this. I am going to touch your spine in 3. 2. 1. now." the touch on his spine still surprises him but aside from the tiny flinch nothing happens. Fauna hums and speaks "I am goign to touch a tiny bit lower." the touch moves but no pain. "very good. a bit lower again." the touch moves lower but his whole spine lights up in pain and Nightmare whimpers as he clams down on Dust's hand.

"It hurts him very badly." the hand on his spine is already gone before Dust finishes his sentence.

Fauna speaks with full praise "Thank you Nightmare. you did amazing. You are very brave."

Nightmare can't help it as he pushes closer to Dust "dusty... it is weird."

silence and Dust hums "what is?"

Nightmare pushes clsoer to Dust "her being nice." people aren't nice to him. they hate him at first sight. why is she different. why...

"Why weren't they nice?" he hates how he sounds but he just wants to know.

Dust holds him clsoer, Dust's hands and arms always know were to hold wihtout hurting him. same for the others. they are safe.

Dust mutters "I don't know. I think they were just dumb." a bit louder "I think we shuld stop."

Fauna is quick to agree "absolutely. I am sorry for not realising we had already hit his limit."

Dust helps him put on his shirt again "Nightmare is an amazing person. but he has the habit of not saying what bothers him." dust holds him close in a hug and dust looks at fauna "the spine is the worst by far. What do you think?"

Fauna writes some things down before speaking "I think you four have been doing a good job with trying to help him heal the pain he was caused. The spine is going to be a slow healing process, even slower because of his magic situation. All you cna do is keep cleanign it daily and making sure it is wrapped up." she finishes writing something.

Dust takes the note and speaks "understood. keep cleaning the wounds daily, wrap them up and check to make sure the wounds don't get bigger. Aside from that he isn't suposed to use his magic aside from easy and stressless things. if he at any moment starts to have headaches we are to call immediantly"

Fauna answers him "indeed. If you have any questions or worries feel free to call. I put the number for my clinic on there as well. Just ask for me and saywho you are and they will call me. I am going to amke sure that everyone knows you are on the emergancy list." slow steps towards the door and exit of the kitchen when she stops "He is a very sweet babybones. I am sorry to hear he got this hurt."

Dust chuckles and just holds him clsoer "we know... we agree..."

a moment of silence before Fauna speaks again "I am going to talk with Crop that you will have to use his bathroom a lot, doctors orders. What else you tlel him is up to you. Have a good day." and she is gone.

They sit in silence nad Dust just helps Nightmare finish his now much colder tea. The taste is still good even when cold...

DUst nuzzles his skull "You oaky?"

Ngihtmare just pushes closer "tired."

Dust chuckles "Yeah... me too... how about this? I am going to help you wrap up your ribs. after that we will lay in the living room together and nap while Killer and Cross get competitive over a card game?"

Nightamre nods and relaxes "yeah" that sounds great. Dust picks him up and takes him to their attic to help him get ready for the rest of the day.

Dust will tell the others how it went and what to watch out for. Nightmare just has to relax and trust him.

And that is okay. Nightmare has gotten a lot better at trusting others.

*------------------*

First Drabble Prev Drabble Next Drabble

[starrystevie]

steve harrington, luxury hotel heir, who wants nothing to do with the family empire. steve who remembers running away from every hotel he was dragged to as early as his memories allow, who stood in the lobbies and screamed until his throat was raw and his mother was so embarrassed she would take him outside.

he grows up knowing it’s in his cards to take everything over once he gets old enough and he despises it. the very idea of being in charge of the hotel chain has his skin crawling, electricity humming through his veins, makes the joint in his jaw constantly tense. rebelling isn’t really an option, not unless he wants to be kicked to the curb, so steve fights back in the smallest ways possible. he grows his hair a little too long, he wears his muddy reebok sneakers with his fancy suits at dinner parties, he snorts out a laugh with a roll of his eyes when his father introduces him as the future of the company.

it all gets to be too much. when steve, freshly 24 and old enough to take on more responsibility, tells his father that he won’t do it, that he won’t be a pawn in their game anymore, he gets cut off. credit cards canceled, fancy loft apartment lease forcibly broken by his father, access to the garages of bmws and mercedes taken away. he could get it all back, return to the ice of luxury he always knew, only if he could prove to his father that he could be a leader the company is proud of.

which is how steve finds himself working at the front desk at a smaller property of theirs in a place that should be named bumfuck, indiana. it’s the only hotel in town, which keeps them steadily busy with a bustling lobby bar and restaurant, as they’re the only lodging for out of town guests. he hates it, hates being confined behind the desks he’d look at with disdain as a kid in uncomfortable slacks and button downs that mirror his uniform now. he has to smile and schmooze and works off upgrade commissions and force himself to not stare off into space during the slow hours, imagining a life that could have been.

he’s been working there a little over a month when summer hours start and the lobby band comes back for the busy nights. it’s nothing exciting, a jazz band of sorts complete with a sax, but their guitarist catches his eye. he’s all long hair and smirks, leather and boots, and exactly the type of person mommy and daddy harrington would lose their minds over. he’s a way of rebelling all on his own in a gorgeously perfect package.

steve catches his eye as they’re setting up next to the bar for the night. the wink he confidently flashes causes the guitarist to stumble a bit before sending back a wave and a shy grin of his own, cheeks flushed the prettiest pink. there’s a phrase rattling around in the back of his head, something about not mixing work and play, but all steve can think of is tangling their fingers and pressing a kiss to the man’s temple before running away wherever together with his father’s angry face fading away behind them.

it’s too tempting of an idea not to try, especially when the guitarist keeps looking at steve with the same look he’s sure to be giving him. especially when they’re both ducking their heads with upturned lips only to glance back up and have their eyes meet again and again. especially when he comes over to the desk after the band's first set and slides a piece of paper with a name and phone number over to steve dotted with x’s and o’s and a smiley face.

and the thing that bothers steve the most is that something amazing could come out of this whole mess and he'd owe it to his father for giving it to him. he's still going to try, though, especially because some hotel band guitarist named eddie is smiling at him like that.

[samiamack]

Cale Rok Headcanons:

KRS is a pillow princess

Bulky/stronk sub

Ace → sex neutral

Willing to do it to fulfill partner

Can make him feel closer to Cale

Wants Cale to be happy

Cale will never engage unless he is certain that Rok Soo consents

Doesn’t enjoy the physical activity aspect

Tends to forget about it while having sex

Can enjoy the act occasionally

Enjoys cuddles after sex

He prefers to express his affection nonverbally

Cuddles

Hugs

Snuggling

Gifts

Acts of service

He loves Cale fiercely

Has a habit of listening to Cale’s heartbeat to remind him that Cale is alive

This habit stems from the trauma of everyone he’s ever loved dying

Cale is the top

Lean muscle dom

Ace → sex positive

Feels closer when and after doing it

Ensures he has consent

Will not engage in any sexual tension if he isn’t sober(almost never)

Enjoys sex

Prefers to express affection physically and verbally

Words of affirmation

Says i love you frequently

Flusters and comforts Rok Soo

Gives compliments frequently

Kisses

Any positive physical touch

Hugs

Snuggles

Arms on waist/shoulders

Gets really insecure about relationship at times and ends up in a spiral of thinking he doesn’t deserve Rok Soo

Rok Soo hates this and tries to help by showing his affection as often as possible

Rok Soo can be averse to touch and won't allow anyone to touch or get near him

Cale respects this and ensures that no one disturb him

Rok Soo likes it when Cale just talks with him during those moments

He also appreciates that Cale will always ask when he is going to go near Rok Soo

The two are the best parental units to their hordes of adopted(legally and emotionally) children.

Cale is genderfluid

Has different wardrobes for all their genders

Ron and Hans can somehow inherently tell which gender Cale is that day/ at the moment(much like Magnus in the Records of Ragnarok)

Deruth is jealous of this ability

KRS is agender but uses he/him pronouns

Due to his appearance people often just assume he is a boy

KRS doesn’t care about whatever pronouns people use for him he just uses he/him because it’s easiest to explain

He actually really likes it when people use anything other than he/him or use he/him but not in a way that seems to imply that they see him as solely a boy (I am 100% projecting here)

Cale catches onto this and will often use whatever random new pronoun he found today in his encyclopedia of neopronouns

Open communication is extremely important to the two so they practice it frequently(I know it’s OCC but in this essay I will-)

They keep almost no secrets from each other

Always inform the other of their plans and if they are injured

Respect keeping each other secrets as they respect each others privacy

Were both hurt by miscommunication in the past so they make sure to always inform the other

KRS is nonverbal

Cale learns sign language to better communicate with KRS first

Rest of the family learn as well

Order:

Kids

Ohn

Hong

Raon

Hans

Ron + Beacrox

Alberu + Rosalyn

Violan + Basen + Lilly

Deruth

Choi Han

Bud Illis

Toonka

Eruhaben already knew sign language

KRS likes to cook for Cale

Cale loves KRS’s cooking

Cale loves to dress KRS up

KRS is fine with whatever as long as it’s comfortable

Cale kisses all of KRS’s scars

KRS finds the scars to be shameful and scary so he gets flustered whenever cale does this

@aro-screams-into-the-void bestie pls opinions I need them!

[beyondtheclose]

Potter Gossip

written for the drarry discord drabble challenge january 2023, for the prompt “rumours”, wc 188. (ao3 link)

thank you to @crazybutgood for beta-ing this for me <3

When Pansy slid in beside him, devious smile in place, and proclaimed that she “learned the most interesting tidbit in DADA today,” Draco considered casting an ear blocking charm at himself. 

“I heard about Potter’s Patronus,” Draco groaned. “The student body is eternally fixated on Potter gossip.”

The first he heard of it was in the Slytherin common room, a sixth year laughing over Harry Potter’s Patronus changing from the mighty stag into a flobberworm. Then, while going to Potions, a group of first years were debating whether it was a lion or a dragon until they noticed him and scattered. Finch-Fletchley told him it was a wolf, delivered with a barely veiled threat to watch out, “because you never know what might happen if a wand slips—wolves are ferocious.”

Never mind that Patronuses can’t cause bodily harm. (That Harry wouldn’t hurt him). 

Hippogriff, beaver, horse—everyone had a theory. It was exhausting. Pansy could excuse him for not caring.

“Oh? You know his Patronus is also an Arctic fox?”

Draco whipped around to the Gryffindor table, only to find the man already looking at him. Was Harry blushing ? 

“Thought so,” Pansy said smugly. 

[hcdragonwrites]

Letters (a @journey-to-the-au Drabble)

I made another thing (yeah I couldn’t help myself but this one is shorter I think. I hope you like it!) I just. Brain fire.

Inspired by <a href="https://www.tumblr.com/journey-to-the-au/722003448742248448/may-we-hear-about-the-yaogui-attack-0-apologies" >This Post </a>

(Also I suck at linking things I’m so sorry.)

Liu crossed out the line on the parchment before him, splashing ink onto the stone beneath his feet in an frustrated spray.

“No that doesn’t sound right either!” He gritted his teeth, growing frustrated. General Liu, one of the Four great Generals of Flower- Fruit mountain and friend to its King Sun Wukong, had a dilemma.

He set the brush down, still getting used to holding it in his hands. Wukong makes this look so easy! But things of the unmonkey nature came easily to Wukong- how could they not ? He had mastered the mysterious arts that had given him such power, had defeated the demon who had first claimed Water- Curtain Cave in his absence (and more beside.) Wukong had walked among the men of the world and had claimed treasure from dragons.

Wukong would be able to hold a brush with ease and write words with a steady hand. The general tugged at his fur and looked about himself. Rolls of parchment lay about him like discarded rinds of watermelons. All the failed attempts to transcribe what his heart was trying to speak. He tugged more, hairs coming free.

When Wukong spoke of his experience in the world abroad their mountain, he had mentioned how the important people within that strange world of mortals and immortals would communicate through scrolls and parchment.

“It was too quiet at times for my liking!” He reminisced once, splashing some wine as he gesticulated upon his throne. “What silence! What needed to be written that couldn’t be communicated with a clear voice?” He would then call for one of the troop of his subjects to retell a story, for Wukong loved the telling of a yarn through voice and act.

Liu had understood why one would want words written down however. The things he wanted to say- to tell- either fled him like mist before the sun or stuck in his throat like a peach stone. The Marshal scratched behind his ear, brushing the notched edge and remembering. Remembering her.

Rin Rin.

Liu had never been one for such deep hesitation as he was now. In all the Aolai country, among and betwixt the unicorns and the phoenixes who preened and called themselves the most beautiful, where the leopards and the tigers roamed and boasted their own majesty, Liu had faced all that threatened his home with bravery. He loved this mountain, from every blade of grass to every luminous stone deep in Water-Curtain Cave. He thought none of the beasts or birds or celestial bodies in Heaven was more beautiful than his home.

Except Her.

He wanted to tell her. Tell Rin Rin how she rivaled all the clouds in heaven for her softness. How no flower could compare to her eyes and how they shined like the sea when the sun hit it. Her smile could make the trees cry and her anger could chase the stripes off a tiger.

Liu was afraid. Not afraid of her. Afraid to miss this opportunity! His tail lashed and sent a bit of paper skittering over the stone floor, knocking into several stone bowls of almonds.

The mountain was a paradise. The waterfall that crashed beyond, the pine forests that dotted the slopes where their needles spiced the air. He had faced tigers and demons, fought and thrown himself into situation after situation of danger without a second thought for himself.

Now he was hesitant. He acted as he had on that day Wukong had found Water- Curtain cave: hesitant. Marshal Liu had not been hesitant since that time- so why had he returned to this state ?

Liu looked down at the paper and groaned.

“I just want to tell her how beautiful she is…”

Steps approached from outside Liu’s room.

“So this is where you’ve been!” Wukong called, stepping into the room with a frown on his face. “I have been waiting for you in the Throne room for hours! Sentries have spotted what look to be the makings of a camp. We have a troop of creatures lurking in the shadow of our mountain and I need my Generals— what is all this stuff ?”

Liu didn’t bother to cover up his failings- he just lay his head on the stone table and glared at the brush.

“You only called for a meeting a few minutes ago, my king.” He replied from the table.

“Minutes- hours. It has been too long! What have you been up to in here?”Wukong picked up a paper scroll, the feathered crown on his head bobbing.

“You are as pretty as a … hmm. You never finished this one Liu!”

Liu moved his face to flatten into the stone table, feeling his cheeks burn and his ears itch. Of course my king would start reading them.

Shuffling paper noises sounded again as Wukong picked another scroll up.

“My heart becomes a candle when you are near—“ he frowned. “You crossed out the rest in a mess of black.”

Liu wished he could dissolve into the stone.

“You smell as sweet as a magnolia flower- your eyes are the shape of stars —“

“Please My King.” He begged. “Spare me.”

“You wrote them Liu! I am only reading.”

“And I ask for mercy, please.”

“Seems you’ve had trouble finishing whatever you were trying to say.” Mused the Sage.

“None of the words formed well enough on the paper.” Marshal Liu sighed. There came a shuffle and a brush beside him. He lifted his head to see Wukong had crossed his legs beside him, a shoulder companionably against Lius. The Monkey King twirled the brush between his fingers, unrolling a new scroll of parchment.

“If I help you Write your love poem to Rin, Will you stop mooning so sadly ?” Wukong cocked a brow at his general, side eyeing him in a way only a friend could.

Marshal Liu felt his pride pricked, just a bit. “I don’t know what you mean.”

“Liu- you have been my friend for countless years. Longer than most monkeys usually live.” Wukong dipped the brush into the inkwell, checking the ink stone and grimacing at its diminished size. “I know you from the tips of your ears to the ends of your fur. We have fought and bled side by side. You may be a master at strategy and planning but. My friend.”

Wukong turned his whole face to stare at Liu. “You suck at hiding how in love you are with Rin Rin.”

The Marshal sat up, opened his mouth to defend, to deflect —

Wukong, Great Sage Equal to Heaven, waited. His face set in a neutral and very are you really going to argue with me? expression.

Liu closed his mouth, tugged at his fur and set his chin on the stone table. “She makes me feel so—-“

“Mhm.”

“She’s so—!”

“Mhm…”

“I just can’t get the words out!” The Marshal admitted finally. “Each time I start to tell her, I freeze. I’ve tried so many times!”

When Rin and He had shared a sweet patch of strawberries he had tried to say how he loved her.

When Rin had been tending to a scratch on his face, chiding and reprimanding him for his recklessness again. Her anger had made him want to hold her and reassure her that he was fine.

When they had decided to stay out late, tails curled together as they counted the stars. Liu had wanted to compare her to each one.

And each of these times his words had either fled him or had refused to come out.

“And you thought to write them out because they keep getting stuck.”

Liu nodded.

“Give me the words and I’ll write them down.” Wukong set the tip, ready. “If I write this for you, then will come and put your mind back to keeping our mountain safe?”

Guilt itched beneath his fur. “My King i'm sorry—“

A affectionate rub of Wukongs head against his own shut the general up as the king tugged at his ear in play.

“Liu. I may not understand the power of what you are feeling,” Wukong cut off, tail thumping against the Marshals “but that doesn’t mean your feelings aren’t important. And … seeing you so distressed makes me distressed. I can help my friend in this simple task at least.”

Liu felt a warmth well from him. For all his Kings boasting and prideful proclamations, Wukong cared for each of his subjects - even in the face of his incomprehension. He would do what he could to ease his friends, his subjects, his families struggles. Wukong began to write as Liu began to speak, his face warm and his hands slowly beginning uncurl from his fur.

After just an hour with Wukongs transcribing and Liu describing, the confession was complete. Liu clutched the scroll and strapped it to his side.

He had been able to attend the Council with a lighter heart and a smile on his face. The discussion and the plans to increase patrols along the pine forest to the west of Flower Fruit Mountain had been unanimously agreed upon as the troubling information came to light.

The scouts' reports had indicated that there had been activity - a half made campfire kicked over and cold with bones from what looked like a small deer- not a few leaps and bounds from the slopes. Liu had frowned at the description of the tracks- five footed, fur and the scent of musk in the air. Another band of Monkeys … but they seem to be scouting us as well.

When Liu had this brought to attention, an immediate patrol had been sent out to gain more information on how many may be circling their home. The unspoken kept being danced around but all in that council chamber had a suspicion. Demon Monkeys….

Until they knew further who and what they were facing, Wukong wouldn’t risk a war troop to prowl the nearby hills and leave the rest of his family and people exposed.

Liu had a bit of time beneath the growing moon of night to find Rin Rin now. Before his nerves left him. Wukongs handwriting had made the words look better, flow better, feel better to the Marshals eyes. His King had sat through his flowery language, and had written it all diligently if with a little bit of snorting at times. (“Don’t compare her to pine nuts!” “But she smells of the pines and the wood and everything I love!” “…. But pine nuts ?”)

If his words failed him, Liu had them written down. If they stuck in his throat, he could pull them apart with the help of his letter. His heart was thumping, his fur was sticking out a bit as electric nerves rolled on his skin. Liu was in full armor having come from council, and it jangled softly in the night air. But it was a comforting jangle- a separate staccato rhythm against his body.

As the moon rose outside of Water-Curtain Cave casting the spray in silver light, Liu gazed out. Some other monkeys mingled in the cooling air enjoying the clear night. Tending to loved ones by either grooming fur, sharing ripening fruits from the many orchards across the vast mountain, or cuddling down in the soft grasses to gaze upward. Liu greeted each in turn, butting heads or brushing hands. Pride welled in him, making Liu stand taller. This was his home- his family. The peace they lived in was hard won and protected by their King and his Marshals- and that peace was precious.

A small bundle of babes shot past, one carrying a lychee fruit as a prize to be kept from the others. A pair of older simians gazed into the waters of the pool, leaning into each other. Liu would fight a thousand demons, all the celestial beings in the world, to keep this peace. He would tame dragons and pull the moon down from its boughs in Heaven to preserve this peace.

Liu turned, green eyes seeking. There, just beneath the pomegranate tree overlooking a mossy spray of water, he spotted the cloud gray of Rin Rin. Even in the shadow of the tree he could see her moon flower perched behind her ear, the fur perfectly groomed in wonderous swirls. He wished he had a bouquet of moonflowers to bring her or a cup of tea to present to her. He wanted to come bearing gifts and to tend and tidy her hair and weave flowers throughout it.

He came bearing his heart instead.

Said heart thumped against his chest. Steady Liu.

Liu took a moment to groom his finger through his fur, his tail, and to dust at his armor. He grabbed at a small patch of pine needles, snapping them between fingers and briefly rubbing the tips over his fur. He wanted to look his best to smell his best to be his best.

Then, gathering himself and tapping the scroll's top at his hip, Liu straightened and stepped forward.

He would tell her how much she meant to him. He would show her how much she was worth to him- between the words he had been able to wrangle and place onto a page.

Liu would never get the chance to unwind that scroll however. The night air that had been full of gentle chatter and warm conversation was broken by screams as the mountain's peace was shattered into a thousand screams of fury and fear rang off the mountain.

[minhxiao]

a drabble for prompt #25: a kiss on the forehead xiao/aether | rating: G | words: 719

Aether stirs the pot of black back perch stew, crushing in a few stems of violetgrass. 

“... and Brother Bosacius had drawn some marks along my face in black ink in a moment when I wasn’t aware…”

It’s a blissfully idle afternoon in his kitchen in the Serenitea Pot and Xiao is telling him a story of his time with his old comrades. Undisturbed sunlight spills in through the windows of his abode. Aether loves how Xiao’s voice always dips into something gentler when he talks about the other Yakshas, his brows soft and reminiscent as he casts his gaze into a long forgotten memory. He was much more uninhibited with his words, when they were alone like this.

“... I had only noticed some time after, when I happened to catch my reflection in the river― all to say, Brother Bosacius was truly… never a boring character…” 

Aether turns to look at him, stifling an amused smile as he tries to imagine someone daring to play such a childish prank on someone like Xiao. His eyes rove over his face, catching absentmindedly on the mark at the center of Xiao’s forehead. 

And perhaps it’s the story Xiao’s just willingly shared, or the unguarded look on his face, but Aether is suddenly filled with the urge to catch him unaware. Xiao is endlessly amusing to tease― Aether has a feeling he would’ve gotten along quite well with Bosacius. 

So he leans in when Xiao is mid-sentence and kisses him right at the mark above his brow. He lingers there for a few seconds, intentional and slow.

Xiao makes a quiet, astonished sound as he freezes. Then, the most remarkable thing happens. His body briefly glows with threads of dark Anemo before his wings manifest in a soft flutter of feathers behind him. A kind, startled wind stirs a small draft in the kitchen. 

Aether leans back slightly, blinking in surprise. That’s new. 

Xiao’s mouth is slightly parted, clearly caught off guard as his wings curl inward behind him.

His surprised expression fills Aether with such fondness that he tugs the adeptus closer by the waist, the stew already forgotten. 

“Did…” Xiao quickly attempts to recover, but Aether can tell by his distracted gaze that his mind is now clearly drawn to the present. “Was my story not interesting enough for you?” 

“On the contrary, I found the story quite endearing,” Aether pulls him close, taking a moment to admire the beauty that is Xiao’s face, “So… what exactly did he draw on your face?” 

“I, uh…” Xiao’s eyes stir as he looks up at him, flicking down once to Aether’s lips before shying away. “I can’t… seem to recall…” 

“Mm, I see,” Aether’s hands rise to wrap around the nape of Xiao’s neck. Then, he dips his mouth to graze his lips along Xiao’s temple before finding the pale purple mark on his forehead once more. “Was it here?” 

Xiao inhales softly, reaching to wrap a steady hand around Aether’s scarf. His eyes slip shut as his wings almost instinctively seem to flap once. This time, the excited draft nearly knocks the placemats off of his kitchen table. 

“Perhaps,” Xiao breathes as he almost imperceptibly tilts his face forward, as if wordlessly asking for more. 

“Still can’t remember?” Aether’s eyes brighten, his lips hovering over Xiao’s forehead. He stores this newfound knowledge carefully into his mind with a private smile. So he likes it when I kiss this mark…

“I… '' Xiao falls silent as Aether kisses him there again, and then down his temple, across his cheekbones. He explores the contours of Xiao’s skin with his lips until the adeptus’ face is pleasantly warm beneath his hands. He kisses him everywhere except his lips and bites back a smug smile when he feels Xiao’s wings flickering restlessly behind him.

Xiao tugs Aether closer by the scarf, his eyes molten. His voice is barely audible. “It… may have been lower.” 

“Lower?” Aether raises an innocent brow. “Where?”

Xiao pulls him down against his mouth with an impatient sigh. 

Aether’s not sure how long he stands in his kitchen, kissing him lazily against the counter, but he’s sure that he wouldn’t mind doing it forever― it’s only the sound of his perch stew boiling over on the stove that eventually pulls them apart.

[ygodmyy20]

Hey anyone want to read my *looks at doc name* Pukes Words On A Page? From a teru pov of him having a panic attack?

SURE

Also I dunno if what I write is body horror or just regular old descriptions but I'll tag just in case. Also I used to never share these but...I am kinda proud of these crazy writings I do. So. Yeah.

If panic attacks are triggering maybe don't read.

Anxiety is eating him alive.

It crawls through his skin like worms through soil, burrowing its way upwards and settling in his chest. He feels sick, his fingers rattling and ribs tightening like a rope around his bones. His insides are rippling with hums and wheezes and he can’t breathe.

Teru doesn’t know what to do with anxiety.

It’s like his body is being eaten from the inside out, rusted talons scraping out his ribs for meat. Dull as they dig into his liver and the bottom of his spine. Blood rushes away from extremities and his head lightens and maybe he will pass out that would be nice but there is nowhere to go. He can’t seem to shake it. He needs to get things done. But his brain is rampaging with thoughts and ideas and he can’t seem to sit still, legs shaking, fingers clawed.

He is distracted but aware, fully present but his mind is lost in space. Nothing is working, like dragging his feet through the mud. Pouring buckets of sand into his eyes and ears and the thoughts are so loud and screaming at him. Crystals pierce the sides of his tear ducts. He wants to call for help, but he wants to talk to no one. He desires a hug, but also wants to go out and find a random ex-CLAW and punch them so hard they fly into the sky.

Panic is settling in.

He is so exhausted.

His powers barely register under his skin.

He never used to feel anxiety when the world was moving so fast and he had no time to even think about being anxious. But now, it is like an extra layer on top of his skin weighing him down. Was it better when I ran off of adrenaline? He thinks briefly before quickly shaking his head.

No no, that was worse.

He knows that was worse.

It was worse

….right?

But at least it made sense before.

You get chased, you run. You get attacked, you fight back.

Not like whatever convoluted hellscape this is where he feels like he just ran a marathon but is sitting at his desk, homework laid out in front of him, hand fisted in blonde hair that comes loose from his sad excuse for a ponytail. He pulls at his hair, noting as some locks come out. He tosses them to the side, the blonde strands floating to the floor.

He is behind in every class, and no matter what he does, he can’t seem to catch up. He can’t seem to figure out why.

He keeps using his powers to get to school faster because he is sleeping in too much.

He can’t sleep because he can't seem to keep his eyes closed.

His powers are drained and he knows it but he just just barely treading through waves.

All he wants to do go over to the Kageyama’s and play video games with them and Shou, and eat too much and be too full and stay up so late that he starts to imagine that the walls are moving into shapes of figures he can’t describe. Shadows and molten black and figures that reach for him but then he feels the flutter or purples and greens and reds from his friends and everything settles back into the walls from where it came.

If he could just take in a full breath maybe he'll be okay.

[glacialswordsman-a]

A gentle, salty breeze caressed cold cheeks as the remaining warmth of twilight began to slowly dissipate.

Upon the sandy shores of Falcon Coast stood the Cavalry Captain, his lone tanzanite eye gazing off into the horizon as sunset hues began to give way to those of dusk. It was the perfect time, in Kaeya’s opinion. The atmosphere was calm, quiet, not too hot…as well as lonely. Nothing but the sound of lapping waves accompanied him this evening, and he was relieved.

It was the peak of summer, and memories of squeals and laughter echoed in his mind as he recalled bright vermillion hues upon a chubby, innocent face. They gazed at him earnestly as the two brothers kicked up sandy waters and collected shells, running along the beach of Mondstadt while their vigilant, doting father kept a close eye on them.

Thus, he was here now. His feet had carried him to this once happy place that now only contained bittersweet nostalgia. He couldn’t be happier that there was only him and himself at this time, haunting the coast in silence.

Removing his fur stole and cape along with his boots, he stepped towards the water and waded in, uncaring of his trousers soaking in the salty sea. A quiet breath in the form of cold vapor escaped past pursed lips as warm tides welcomed his presence, pulling him in just a little deeper. He followed until the sea was at mid-thigh level, his starry eye shutting as he merely stood in place.

Time passes on just like this.

Kaeya made no motion of moving, seeming to be frozen. One would think of him as a statue were it not for the rise and fall of his chest as he breathed, allowing himself to simply be. To feel the barest of his emotions picking at the ice that ensconced his heart.

His mind took him back to his childhood, to brighter days where the sun touched his skin without melting him. Where it swathed him in gentle, kind warmth and cradled him in a loving embrace, and had given him promises that it would always be there for him.

The Sun had always gazed at the Moon affectionately, fondly, as he took him in his arms as if he were one of his own Stars. One of his own kin; even though they knew he was anything but. He was his satellite, shining only with the light he was given, and hiding within his shadow whenever he turned away. For most people, it would be a dreary existence, to not once glow on their own and instead rely upon the rays that reflected off them.

He couldn’t deny that he thought it once dreary, himself. However, looking back on it now, he wished he could feel that warmth once more. He wished he could return into safe arms that held him and assured him he was loved and would never be alone; arms that swore to protect him—until they had burned him.

The memory of that dreadful expression was forever burned in his mind’s eye, tormenting him until the day he drew his very last breath. The Moon had betrayed the Sun that evening, the flames of his fury and pain scorching his body and leaving it marred forevermore, before the heat gave way to cold that shrouded him in shadow. It was a grim declaration and reminder that he must always lead a life of deception and lies, as he was made to forsake those that had called him family.

Slowly, his eye fluttered open, illuminated by the moon that now hung high in the sky. He hadn’t realized how much time had gone by, his skin prickling from the frigid waters of the ocean that surrounded him. It continued to envelop his legs, beckoning him to submerge himself into its embrace, tempting him to drift away into the abyssal depths where he may find comfort and peace at last.

       

… Not today.

With a slow, deep, trembling exhale, he turned away from the deep and trudged back towards land from the shoal, figuring he had spent long enough out here in his thoughts.

It was time to head back home.

[azul-marie]

vergil. (little boy lost)

fem. reader. angst.

he remembers the first time you kissed him.

in his youth, when the two of you were children, beneath an old oak tree hidden away from streets and homes. an entrance to a forest unseen, but close enough he could find his way back home for supper. and for him to walk you home safely, as he always did.

he had gotten into another fight with dante, the third one that week. most of his bruises were healed, the last one turning his lips a violet blue.

“does it hurt?” you had asked, the sweet way that made his heart do somersaults. “come here, let me see.”

he wanted to brush it off, puff his chest out and be tough, just like father was. wanted to show he was stronger than one of dante’s punches, kicks or bites he inflicted. but in a haze, whether it was the sound of your voice or the soft of your smile, he had no choice but to meekly obey.

a little finger pressed tentatively against his lips. his pulse quickened, but from pain or excitement he did not know which. all he could do was stare into your eyes, a gentle gleamed observer who brought warmth with her touch.

“it’s still bright.” you murmured, tracing along his mouth. you were close enough that your hair touched his cheek, sending a pleasant itch down his face. “that dante, always making trouble.”

“tell me about it.” he huffed, trying to lift his head up higher. “in any case, i still won.”

“is that all that matters to you?” you laughed, playfully tapping his nose. “even when you get hurt so much?”

“winning means i’m better than him,” he said matter of factly, “that’s all there is to care about.”

you hummed, a neutral noise. he wondered briefly if he’d said something wrong. he meant to drop his shoulders, backtrack his words, when you had asked the question he would still hear in his sleep later that night, clear as crystal daylight.

“would a kiss make you feel better?”

he blushed.

or maybe he looked away, or pretended you were joking. this part was always muddled. but he remembers the awestruck nod he gave you. he remembers your little hands cupping his face. he remembers the one innocent act of a girl, wanting to sooth the boy she adored.

he does not want to remember much after that.

the memory smells strongly of sap and crushed autumn leaves. it is the only recollection that replays deep within his mindscape, where his human side wanders aimlessly, where his youthful self still stands, a bystander to glimpses of his past. who watches with intent the beauty of you, the heart of his longing and childish love. who watches with a blank, bloodied face, this memory that once brought delight to a childish boy.

it is all vergil has left of you.

you will never kiss him again.

[inkykeiji]

>.<

[weepylucifer]

4 or 48 for steban/ulixes?

4. “Do you…well…I mean…I could give you a massage?”

Steban sighs and stares down at his desk. His unfinished essay stares back at him, accusing. Really, the only thing he still needs is a strong conclusion, but he's never been good at these, and he's tired. Then the draft will need to be edited. Steban considers the vast arry of edits that likely needs to be made, and contemplates going missing.

His wrist is cramped from writing. His shoulders ache from having sat hunched over the desk for hours. His eyes are disgustingly sticky with exhaustion. Vaguely, he notes that it has grown dark outside, most probably a while ago.

"Are you about done?" Ulixes asks, shattering the silence.

Uli has been so quiet, Steban almost forgot he's there. But all evening he's been on Steban's bed, a small pile of books close to hand, doing research for an essay of his own.

"I want to walk into the pale," Steban tells him.

"Succumbing to the pale constitutes defeatism, which is the enemy of the cause," Ulixes says, which, Steban has learned to identify in the two years they've been friends, is an Ulixes Joke.

He's too tired to laugh, though, so he just says, "Yeah. Good reminder." He rubs his aching wrist, trying to coax some life into it. It doesn't really help. Besides, he's starting to feel a tension headache coming on. "Alright, let's get it done."

Ulixes cocks his head like a curious creature. "I didn't mean to imply... you don't have to finish it right now. Take a break?"

"I'll fall asleep." He tries to relax his shoulders. Something crackles ominously. "Ouch. This chair might be really bad for my back."

When Steban cranes his neck to look back, Uli has sat up straighter on the bed. "Are you okay? Are you in pain?"

It's sweet, Steban thinks, how Uli wants to look out for him, but he startles so quickly sometimes. It reminds Steban of when he tried to raise his first plant: he'd plied it with attentions, completely overwatered it, and when it inevitably died, he'd lied on the floor and reproached himself for hours. Okay, the metaphor is getting away from him a little. It reminds him of somebody who's been tasked with safeguarding a fragile, precious thing, who has no experience with fragile, precious things.

"I'm fine," he says, "just tense."

Ulixes fidgets a little. Then he asks, "Do you… well… I mean… I could give you a massage?"

This is so unexpected, it snaps Steban clean out of his fatigue. It's not that he has a problem with the suggestion, but... Uli doesn't really touch people, in general. "Do you know how to do that?"

Ulixes blushes faintly, for some reason, and admits, "I read a manual. From the bookstore." He gestures in the rough direction of the bookstore. Before Steban can ask why he did that, Uli adds, "I thought it would be edifying to... acquire a set of diverse skills. You know, like Nilsen."

Steban nods. "Ah. Of course, that makes sense." Wanting to emulate Nilsen... it checks out. "Well, if you want a test subject for your new skill, here I am."

For a moment, Ulixes seems hesitant. Eventually, however, he approaches. "I haven't done this before," he says. "I can't guarantee it will be good."

Steban smiles at him, because Uli starting a hobby that is something else than reading about war crimes, debating war crimes, or sitting very quietly and thinking about war crimes must be encouraged. "I'm sure you'll do fine."

Slowly, skittishly, Ulixes moves to put his hands on Steban's shoulders. "Um... may I...?"

"Hmm?" Will he just start already, Steban thinks.

"Your hair."

"Oh. Right. Of course." He feels Ulixes brush his hair off to one side, and then, finally, Uli's hands settle on his shoulders. He expects Uli to squeeze way too tightly, but this doesn't manifest - his touches are light, gently prodding, checking for tension points. Testing the waters, almost. Eventually, he begins to rub his shoulders, still so lightly, like he doesn't trust himself with more.

"Go on already, I can barely feel it," Steban mutters. Then - and he doesn't quite know where that thought came from, only that it makes him feel a strange thrill, "Actually, should I take my shirt off?"

Uli makes an odd sound, like he just swallowed his own tongue. His voice sounds choked when he says, after a beat, "Yeah, okay."

Steban shrugs off his shirt, folds it neatly and puts it on the desk. He's not squeamish about this stuff, and Uli has certainly seen him shirtless before in the summer, when he just overheats so terribly, but there is a sense of heightened intimacy to it when Uli actually touches his skin. That hasn't happened before, as far as he can recall.

Is he imagining it, or does Uli's breath hitch minutely at the touch?

Then Uli's hands settle finally on his shoulders, and his long, clever fingers begin a kneading motion.

It's surprising how much it hurts - "Oof, you've got some knots here," Uli mutters, and Steban has to gasp mutely as his knuckles dig into a tight, tense spot along the back of his neck - but it's a good pain, benevolent, cleansing, and when it fades, it leaves behind... lightness. Ulixes is squeezing that sore and heavy feeling out of him, and Steban almost gets teary at the intense pressure followed by intense relief.

"The manual said this could hurt a little," Uli explains, and Steban shakes his head and breathes, "You're good. It's all good" as he, his head a little swimmy, has to imagine how it would feel if Uli's hands were on him everywhere like this, stroking and pressing, traversing every inch of him until no part of his body remained unmarked by touch. If he reached around from his back to his chest, palming his nipples, then down his stomach where he's been accumulating just the slightest sliver of softness since mums started sending all those care packages, then down his thighs and up again...

A shivery little sound of pleasure escapes his lips, almost a moan, but Steban can't bring himself to feel embarrassed by it. It simply feels too good to be touched by Ulixes, his comrade, his dearest friend. Alight, elated, he doesn't even mind that he's getting hard, shifting surreptitiously in his seat to build up friction. He hopes Ulixes doesn't see it, but it's a detached hope, and he can't even dredge up the wherewithal to be genuinely apprehensive about it. He bites his lip and contemplates, hazy and needful: he knows Ulixes focuses intently when he's immersed in a task, maybe, if his focus is deep, he won't even notice if Steban cums quietly in his pants, and that'd be that taken care of... he's just not sure if he can cum quietly. Already, he's making all kinds of small noises without wanting to that he can only insufficiently muffle or hold back.

No, undoubtedly, if he doesn't get himself together, Uli will notice, will look him over properly, concerned, and see the bulge in his pants. And that'll likely be the end of this, or maybe... maybe he will see the need in his lap and lean forward, reach down there and take him in hand, cup him in those slim, pleasing hands and draw heights of pleasure out of him...

...Nn-no. That's a little too much. He can't expect that of his friend, nor ask it... Uli has done him a great kindness today already. It would be uncomradely to exploit it, or even entertain the thought. With a great mental heave, Steban jolts himself back to reality.

"Okay," he says when he thinks he can trust his voice to come out relatively firmly, "that was... good. I think... enough, for today."

Ulixes takes his hands away. A part of Steban is relieved, another part wants the touch back. "Did..." Uli clears his throat. There's something odd about his voice. "Did I do okay?"

"Of course." Now, Steban reflects, he only has to get out of this situation somehow with his dignity intact. Maybe he didn't think this whole thing through.

Trying to shield his still-unflagging erection from view, he attempts to half-turn towards Ulixes, heeding too late Uli's startled cry of "No, wait!". He takes Uli in like seeing him clearly for the first time in a while: his hands still raised, his flustered expression, the flush on his face, the... quite sizeable tent in his pants.

"Ah. Hah. Well." Steban is keenly aware that his attempt at an urbane laugh just comes out... weird. He can feel his face heating up. But surely this isn't... well... they both understand these things, don't they. They're progressive, forward-thinking individuals, men of the world really, and as such enlightened intellectuals, they don't make a big deal out of it when they get hard touching their best friend. Right? Certainly.

...they're not men of the world, actually.

Steban realizes he stands at a crossroad: they can either try to politely ignore this situation, clumsily make light of it, and allow awkwardness to permeate the space between them. Or they can come together, press against each other, unite in a glorious, hungry kiss.

Steban makes a choice.

[invaderzia1]

kas!eddie, MDNI, tw: blood sucking things

it’s been two weeks since Eddie “died”. two weeks of pain and isolation for his best friend, who couldn’t save him. that is until you get a call from Steve that you need to make your way to his house as it’s an emergancy. so you rush over only to find most of the eclectic group had also come as well. you barely made it out of your car before a seemingly alive Eddie came barreling out the front door towards you, followed by a tired Steve and the rest of the crew.

it was unbelievable, his wounds had healed almost completely and he somehow made it out of the upside down. nobody could give a solid answer on how and while Hooper worked on a way to somehow prove Eddie’s innocence, the rest of the group of older teens were tasked with babysitting Eddie. making sure he didn’t expose himself to the town and providing shelter for him. which would be much easier if he wasn’t stuck on being with you 25/8.

the first few days were odd, going from the deep depression of your best friend dying to suddenly having him back, any weird things he did were choked up to the whole being dead thing. you were able to safely dismiss any weird things under the pretense of being happy he was alive, up until you were ordering food and he almost seemed revolted of the idea of eating his favorite dish. the dish he has never once said no to in the 6 years you’ve known him. at this point you start to notice the oddities of this new Eddie.

it was still the same Eddie Munson you had spent the majority of high school with, deep down you knew that. but something in him had changed, little quirks he now had picked up postmortem. he was almost always hungry, no matter how much he ate. his tastes had changed too, finding certain foods unbearable now. and he was almost stupidly strong, having accidentally broken the front door at Steve’s house when slamming it open to see you.

none of it made sense, until you sliced your finger while making food. without saying anything, Eddie knew, even from across the room. his eyes which had been trained on the tv were now on you as he seemed almost fixated on your finger. his knuckles were white as he firmly gripped his knees, his nails digging into the denim of his jeans. his eyes were wide, like some crazed animal. he knew he was dangerous in that moment and took every bit of strength to hold himself back from doing anything irrational, but as you washed the blood off and started to bandage the appendage, it was like torture to him. the deep hunger within him felt 1000 times worse than before. every inch of his body was screaming to move towards you, as if it was all he needed.

looking up at him, it all clicked into place. you could tell he was holding himself back, seemingly fighting back his own mind. all the pieces finally came together, his wounds healing all by themselves, why he was always hungry, his newfound strength, his clinginess towards you. all of it made sense.

holy fuck, your best friend is a fucking vampire now.

and in a moment of clarity, or insane stupidity, you moved closer to him, his self restraint only being tested even more as he could smell your blood getting closer. you got nearly arms length away from him before he spoke, begging you to leave before he couldn’t hold himself back, begging to not let him hurt you.

“please, Eddie, let me help you,” you said quietly, “i trust you.”

he stared at you, his eyes still as frenzied as they were before, searching your face for any sign of uncertainty. he didn’t want to do anything to you, he couldn’t hurt his best friend like this, he couldn’t lose you like this. he didn’t want to become the monster everyone thought he was, like all the rumors around town had said he was. staring deep into your eyes he could see only love and trust.

slowly, you took a step forward, waiting to see if Eddie would stop you. when he didnt, you let yourself get close enough to straddle his lap, moving his hands from his knees onto your waist. the intimate position allowed for Eddie to bring his face to your neck, almost hypnotized by the way the blood pumped through your veins, as if they called his name. the closer you were, the more delirious he felt as the hunger took over. his head darted up as his hands gripped your hips, steadying himself as he fought his mind for control once again.

“fuck, sweetheart, if you don’t stop me now, then I’ll…”

placing your hands on his shoulders, you leaned down and pressed a soft kiss onto his lips. then resting your forehead against his, before softly telling him you trust him.

that was all he needed to hear before leaning his head back down, experimentally pressing a kiss to your neck. he felt the way you shivered as his lips pressed against your neck, a sight he has always wanted to see of you. experimentally, he let his tongue swipe across your neck, the taste of your skin being like ambrosia from the gods to him. his hands shook against your hips as the self control he had been displaying slowly slipped from his hands. his new vampire instincts took over as his sharp canines broke through the flesh of your neck.

a broken cry left your lips as you felt him suckle at your neck. your hips ground against his as you clawed at his shoulder blades. your body tensed at the first wave of pain, unused to the feeling of him drinking, but was soon replaced by an odd feeling of pleasure. as your body relaxed into him, his hands moved from your hips to your back, helping support you. his grip was still tight, as if letting you go would result in your disappearing all together.

after a few more seconds, Eddie pulled himself away, fighting back these vampire instincts before he lost full control. for the first time in days, he seemed full. his eyes were full of life again and there was almost color back in his cheeks. his hands still held you close, but not as bone crushing as they had been. Eddie had the red of your blood stained on his lips, smeared downward from having pulled away. your hand shakily reached up to cup his cheek, Eddie was more than happy to nuzzle into it. his eyes were staring right into yours watching the way you caught your breath.

recovering from the blood loss, you rest your forehead back against his, a smile exploding on your face as it dawned on you how this would effect your relationship going forward. your body wobbled slightly as it became weak, Eddie held you up to stop you from falling away from him.

slowly you were leaned towards your right, slowly let onto the unoccupied side of the couch. Eddie then crawled over you, caging your body underneath his. his eyes looked over you for any sign of distress, his gaze loving compared to the lust he felt not long ago, before letting himself lean forward and nuzzle into the untouched side of your neck, his breath tickling the skin.

“I hope you know you’re mine now.”

[grapecaseschoices]

Those word prompts are so good!! If you're taking prompts for the May challenge (no pressure!!): cantankerous or audacity

You feel as if you are being warmed from the inside out. Your chest is expanding to the point where it feels like your heart is trying to break apart your ribs, and your throat feels so tight that it almost hurts to swallow. You feel faint. The AC is on blast, and you feel so heated as if you're about to faint. There is no way that the effect of it - there is no way that your stomach is churning and your heart is hammering - isn't showing up on your face. 

From where he was seated, so close to you, he could see everything. If only he wasn't, as he claimed, 'blinder than a bat born in an abyss.' 

His cantankerous tone momentarily dragged you back to your senses, "I thought you said you knew how to put in contacts."

You manage not to flinch. But you can't quite contain the hitch in your breath at the feeling of the way his words tickle against your lips. 

Yes, momentarily. 

He was ... too close! Offering to help him replace his contacts had been a bad idea. Why had you thought this was a good idea? This was a terrible idea!

"Ms. Carita?" 

[aetherose]

To Dearest Nim

—The recollections of the ethereal sorceress

Spoilers for all of Baldur's Gate 3 and the Dark Urge storyline

She knew from the start the ending that her road would lead her to.

To resist her nature, these wretched urges that tried so hard to control her...somehow, a part of her always knew something like her was doomed from the beginning.

At first, perhaps it was a mere hope. A hope to be released from these shackles her urges were, even if the release was death. She was a danger to all around her, and she believed salvation wasn't something she deserved, let alone possible. What she deserved, and what was more realistic to occur, was oblivion.

But it became clearer that her hopes weren't merely that, but perhaps shreds of her past memories tugging at her fractured mind and reminding her, even if only vaguely, of what she was, of the truth of her life.

A Bhaalspawn.

A pure-blooded Bhaalspawn with urges far more horrific and intense than any other whom preceded her.

An imitation of an elf predestined to either follow her father's wishes and paint the world red with the blood of its inhabitants...

Or to reject her father, and pay the ultimate price; her life.

A price her past self wasn't strong enough to pay, after killing every person dear to her, after suffering these urges since childhood.

She was tired of rejecting her true nature back then, and found a home amongst the Temple of Bhaal. Sceleritas was like another father to her and was fiercely loyal even when she may have done horrific things to him.

It certainly did help he never stayed dead when she killed him.

Meeting Gortash led her to have a companion who accepted her for all that she was, her urges and all. As long as she could control herself when necessary, of course, and at that time, she was able to, because she indulged in it otherwise regularly.

To be accepted and have a true home in such a way...

That was all she ever really wanted.

But she'd never admit back then she wasn't truly happy.

Or perhaps she simply couldn't realize it through the haze of pride, insanity, ambition, and supposed joy she felt.

But her Orin-induced amnesia gave her another chance. Her personality shifted, and she became able to have a new start, even if it came with the caveat of having an illithid tadpole in her head.

At first, she didn't truly feel too bad about her urges or when she did something that was thought of as 'bad'.

She didn't fully understand the notion, and her urges were something she wished to disobey out of fear and spite. Fear of being abandoned and controlled, and spite for these rancid thoughts in her mind that compelled her to do things she didn't really want to do.

But her companions...changed her. From the first moment, she became attached because she had nothing else, and their views let her learn and grow.

And then, Alfira's death put it all into perspective.

Remorse weighed on her heart, alongside the true reality of Nimue's godsforsaken urges.

As time went on, she continued to change, as everything kept spiraling on her and her companions' journey to be cured of their parasites. She grew more...approachable. She found she was able to smile more and more. She began to loosen up, joking around and teasing more.

She still remained fairly mild-mannered and distant, but her companions still changed her.

But what didn't change was her fear of being abandoned by them, and therefore, her fear of her urges being discovered.

So she hid them until she couldn't anymore.

She refused to kill Isobel.

And then she was forced to try to murder the companion closest to her.

She thought she'd be killed immediately. It's what she deserved. What she secretly hoped for.

But that wasn't what happened.

Instead, she was...accepted as word spread across camp of what happened. She was shocked, overjoyed, confused, terrified, so much all at once. But in the end, she was accepted.

That was the first time anyone saw her cry.

And they wouldn't see her do so again until after reaching Wyrm's Rock, and discovering she was behind the entire mess with the Cult of the Absolute, formerly working with Ketheric and Gortash to take over this world.

And to top it all off, it coincided with her vision of Orin and her remembrance of her nature as a Bhaalspawn.

It all made sense now, and all she wanted was to throw herself off a cliff.

She didn't deserve to lead her companions. She didn't deserve to even be alive. She was just a monster who hid underneath the skin of a beautiful High Elf woman.

All of this was her fault. She hurt her companions in such an unfathomably large way, by being responsible for this oncoming catastrophe.

She normally hated being in the spotlight, the center of attention. But now, she couldn't stand that several of her companions couldn't even look at her. Somehow, being looked at with disdain was more bearable than that. She broke down crying, and ran off to hide from them all.

How ironic. Did the gods think this was funny? Did they think it was amusing, to let her be born and continue living a life drenched in so many sins, then proceed to make her lose her memory and come to realize the atrocities she'd committed in the past?

She didn't think it was funny. Not at all.

But...in time, they came to accept her again. She was so close to finally begging Jaheira to end her misery that day, but...in the end, they recognized she had no idea of this just the same as them.

She wasn't the same person that created this crisis anymore. She'd forgotten it all and changed. Even if fragments of memories were returning, they didn't feel quite hers anymore.

She almost broke down crying again, but simply hugged them all in gratefulness.

As she helped her companions tie up loose ends and progress was made towards obtaining all of the Netherstones as fast as possible, it was soon the day before her ragtag group of misfits was to head to Orin and return their stolen companion home.

She knew she would die tomorrow.

Yet, she strangely felt...

Serene.

At peace.

She stayed awake as her companions slept around her, and she simply walked around and gazed upon their sleeping faces with a look of fondness.

Shadowheart, Lae'zel, Astarion, Gale, Wyll, and Karlach. They'd been with her since the beginning, and they were especially precious to her for that.

Halsin, Jaheira, and Minsc. They were newer additions, but ones she still cherished.

Scratch and the Owlbear Cub. She never accepted them being called pets; they were her friends, her companions, just as much as everyone else.

Alfira. She never got to adventure with them properly, but Nimue still kept Lihala's lute with her, and considered her an honorary member of their group, even after her death.

It wouldn't be long before Nimue would join Alfira in the afterlife, and she'd apologize to her properly then.

She felt Scratch's eyes on her as she turned back to return to her bed. She gave him a pet, alongside the Owlbear Cub who slept beside him, and whispered softly, with a mixture of fondness and sadness, "I'll always be here for you two in spirit. Live on the best you can."

Her only regret...

Was that she wouldn't be able to witness her companions continue to endeavor to the very end.

For the first night in a very long time, she slept peacefully...

Knowing it would all be over soon.

At last, the end of her long, arduous journey arrived, as she was finally face-to-face with her father, the God of Murder himself, Bhaal, after killing her very own 'bloodkin', Orin.

Some part of her felt bad for Orin, she had to admit. Orin...never had another chance like Nimue did. Never had companions who could lead her down a different path. Or amnesia. Ironically, Nimue owed her for giving her this chance.

And some part of her had to wonder...

If their roles were reversed, would things have turned out the same way?

But...there was no time to contemplate it.

For at the finale, there was a choice to be made.

To be a god's puppet and destroy this world in Bhaal's name...

Or to die, finally being able to rest, and saving the world from herself?

It wasn't even a question. It was a choice she'd long anticipated. And she had already decided her answer every time she pondered it.

'I will die for their sake. I will die to be free. It's what I deserve.'

And so, she refused her father's gift. Refused to return to her role as his Chosen. She chose to defy a god, knowing what the consequences will be.

"Your life is mine. Accept your inheritance, or I will reclaim it."

Her last chance to reconsider; but even knowing that, she didn't falter. She merely took a deep breath, and she turned back to her companions with a sad smile.

"...I'm sorry. And I...love you all."

And she turned back to her father, accepting her fate with a smile, ignoring her companions' voices filled with concern at her words.

'Let me be free. Let me rest.'

"...Then reclaim it."

Even through the pain of every drop of her blood being drained from her body, she continued to smile, and one final thought crossed her mind...

'Farewell, my dearest friends. Thank you...for everything. May we meet again...in another life.'

And all became black.