#i rly wanna talk to u all and open my ask box but :’)

[saintobio]

rereading SN (to make sure i don’t miss anything in SY) and i just have a few commentaries:

first of all, sn!naoya is so funny pls. ik he has more scenes later in this series but i forgot most of his dialogues :’D

second, currently at sn6 and oh god how did u all survive this and when does it get better omg i forgot these painful scenes even existed ??

third, tojiyn interactions on sn are sooo :’)

[mizunetzu]

hi!! i just found your blog and i may or may not have binged all the fics 😼😼 i was wondering if you could write a dabi or hawks x male reader where the reader is a rly gentle and kind barista and dabi/hawks is just wHIPPED for him? i think thatd be mad cute 👉👈

LMAOOO DABI + HAWKS TIME TURN IT UP-

——————

Headcannons - Dabi and Hawks whipped for their local barista

⚠️Warnings - kidnapping (dabi)

Pronouns - male, he/him

——————

Dabi:

Ok so like hear me out

At first

AT FIRST

you didn’t catch this mans eye

In fact, he didn’t go to the coffee shop you worked at much because yknow...villain...

But it was late at night one day yk

And mans was like “oh boy, i sure am thirsty after committing homcide and robbery”

N the first place he sees

Dun dun dun

Is the 24 hr coffee shop you worked at HAHAHA

So he goes in, preparing to like-idk, threaten ur life for a cup of coffee or smth mean n whatnot

The door bell rings, and you turn around and give him the KINDEST MOST GENTLE-EST SMILE HES EVER SEEN

As a villain, and just someone who looks out of the ordinary in general, he never got much of that

SO WHEN HE SEES THIS...MAN SMILING FUCKING SUN RAYS AT HIM

HE FREEZES

You ask him if he’s ok, and DAMN UR VOICE WAS SO SOFT IT WAS BARELY INAUDIBLE WHAGSHDHEH

Mans usually isn’t at a loss for words but HE IS NOW

Instead of threatening you for a cup of coffee, he actually orders like a normal person

He’s the only one in the cafe since it’s so late, and you had the late night shift lucky you

He sat in the corner with his coffee in silence, occasionally stealing glances at you sweeping the floor or counting the money in the register

what was this foreign feeling in his chest whavabwhshs

He didn’t notice when you walked up to him

mans almost roasted you alive

LMAO BUT HE DIDNT SO IT OK

“Are you doing okay? Do you want a refill?”

He wasn’t really thirsty anymore but he did get a refill because he wanted to stay and watch you work some more like a creep

Yeah, one refill turned to three and he ended up talking to you for the rest of the night AWW

He was honestly suprised you didn’t know he was a villain, with the dark coat and scars and stuff

He ended up buying more coffee to take back to the league with the money he stole HAHAHA

Toga, sipping on her third coffee: yo why u buy so much damn

Dabi: 🤠

He started coming over more and more in the dead of night, on the days you worked which he totally didn’t find out by sneaking into the back room of the cafe and checking the schedule

You, somehow, didn’t find it suspicious that he’d always visit whenever you worked

One day, on one of the numerous times he’s visited, you mentioned how you used to be a bartender before switching over to being a barista

Something just...clicked

He’s a villain, right? Why’s he going so far to appeal to you, when he could just kidnap you and convince you to join the league?

So he did just that

You woke up in their weird club bar room hideout, tied to a chair with dabi and a few unfamiliar faces

Dabi lowkey felt bad (even for him) because even though you were literally just kidnapped, you gave him one of those heartwarming smiles

Even if it was a bit scared and forced, and probably a coping mechanism out of fear

“Look I ain’t gonna hurt you, dude. You’re one of my favorite people, so I’m offering you a deal.”

“Siiiiiiimp.”

“Shut the fuck up, Toga.”

Dabi nudged the girls side.

A girl with blond hair and a school girls uniform pointed a knife at you. You flinched and dabi kept talking

“You said you used to be a bartender, right? I’m sure you can help this guy out behind the counter. Join us.”

Dabi motioned at Kurogiri. He waved, LMAOO

“Join me...please”

As scared as you were, you couldn’t deny the fact you had a soft spot for this scarily intimating man who’d sit in the corner and sip coffee everyday at work

Hell, sometimes (all the time LNAJS) you joined him and you’d talk for hours

And hearing this guy say “please” for the first time?

You nodded slowly, and dabi smiled

It was a nice smile, even if it was a bit scary

How could you possibly refuse?

——————

Hawks:

Since he wasn’t yknow...fucking iilegal and a villain, he came by to your coffee shop during the day

He was workin, caught and turned in a villain yk the usual

And he was kinda far away from his house, n he was gettin kinda hungry

He was flying around the city, when he spotted your lil coffee shop

Well, it wasn’t really a coffee shop, more like a food stop that so happens to sell coffee n drinks aswell

And hEY

you just opened up too, it was a relatively new place

My mans hawks supporting new & local businesses <3

He goes in right

He sees yakitori on the menu and goes :D

So he goes to order

And sees this,,, BEAUTIFUL HANDSOME MAN BEHIND THE COUNTER

“Hi Mister! What can I do you for?”

YOUR VOICE WAS LIKE FUCKING ANGELS SINGING WHAGSHW

I think the main reason hawks was drawn to you was the fact you didn’t treat him like a celebrity and kissed his ass n whatnot, mainly bc you didn’t really keep up nor care about the trending hero’s and stuff (no offense to hawks and none taken)

He choked on his yakitori when you walked up to his lil table and asked for a picture for ur grandpa (who was a BIG fan, unlike you)

MANS REALLY HAD TO PUT ON HIS MOST CHARMING SMILE AND PEACE SIGN THIS SIMP IM HDHEIDIE

He kept going out of his way to visit ur shop frequently even though he lived preeeeetty far off

I mean mans has wings so it ain’t a problem but-

This simp-

He doesn’t show up in his hero outfit (unless he’s coming from patrol) so you didn’t really see him as “Hawks the hero”, more like “Keigo, the man who has stupid endeavor shorts and likes yakitori”

It’s really sweet he shows up in stupid graphic shirts and sweatpants he looks comfy-

He openly flirts with you, and at first you laughed and smiled because you didn’t wanna be rude (it still did things to Keigos heart)

but then

Ur laughs n smiles when he drops a stupid pickup line? They real

The way you offer to take over ur coworkers shifts just to see if Hawks stops by? It’s love just admit it

The totally unfair discount you gave him on yakitori, not mentioning the way you know how Keigo prefers it by heart? Just ask him out already DAMN

You two didn’t have any personal info on eachother, no numbers, emails, hell, Keigo didn’t know your first name (in Japan, you don’t really go by first names unless ur with fam or close friends yk?)

So when you nervously hand him his box of yakitori one day?

Hawks is like 🤠👍?

He opens it and sees:

“(Xxx)-xxx-xxxx -call me, and maybe we can, I don’t know, go out on a date and get to know each other more, yakitori-kun? ~(Y/n)

So ur first name was (Y/n), huh

HES WHIPPED

HES SIMPING

He looks over at you, hiding ur face and sneaking glances at him while ur coworkers stiffing snickers and nudging ur side

GOD TAKE HIM NOW

you bet ur ass hes calling u later and saving ur contact as “My yakitori man (Y/n) ✨❤️”

——————

Thank y’all for 700, by the way !! I love you all !!

[valentine-writes]

MOVED TO @l0vem41l !

[ MASTERLIST ]

rules + intro under the cut !! (plz read before req!)

hi!! welcome to my blog (๑>ᴗ<๑) !

i'm valentine, i use she/he/it prns and i luv writing!!!

i don't think i'll ever do any full ficz but plz feel free 2 drop hc reqz when open! i'd love to hear what you want me 2 write up! scroll down for things to know when requesting, tags, and other info!

TAGS + INFO !

[ TAG: #valentine's masterlist ! ] - access to all masterlists which are available!

[ TAG: #valentine's rambles ] - i talk too much abt things :p

[TAG: #valentine's ocs ] - i have funny little guys in my brain that i share sometimes

WILL NOT DO !

nsfw (requesting it will get u blocked), gore, heavily triggering topics (this is vague, so don't be afraid to ask about certain things!), incest, pedophilia, kink/fetish content

WILL DO !

x reader, my ocs x reader, romantic headcanons, platonic headcanons, general headcanons, specific gendered readers (default gender neutral if not stated!)

MSG TO DOUBLE CHECK !

character x character, angst, major character death

TAGLIST !

message in inbox (or private message) if you want to be tagged whenever i write for a specific character!!! just make sure 2 drop ur @ + the character(s) u want (oﾟvﾟ)ノ

SOURCES + FANDOMS:

video games + visual novels

fnaf security breach, the quarry, the arcana game

movies, tv shows + anime

sanrio danshi, moon knight, into the spiderverse/across the spiderverse [✩]

other

my ocs (i gotta introduce them first though- oops)

OTHER NOTES + RULES !

i will and can refuse/delete requests i'm uncomfortable with writing!

i'm a sfw blog! i don't wanna write nsfw stuff and will never, so i'm putting it here a second time just so u know

i am strictly a sfw account! i'd prefer not to interact w/ accounts that are nsfw but tbh,, i don't rly care if nsfw accs interact w/ me. if u msg me or put sumn in my ask/req box tho, no majorly explicit stuff!!!

there are certain characters i will not write x reader for, just ask if you're uncertain!

sources/fandoms with "✩" beside it means those r the ones i am more focused on atm!!

don't spam me or my inbox plz </3 i'm very busy so it might take a while for me to get to ur request

unless you're a close friend or mutual that's requesting, i will not write oc x character, oc x oc, or oc content of your oc(s)

i no longer write for genshin (just,,, not all that into it when sumeru hit)

i no longer write for ddlc (i LOVE MY GIRLS. but i will not write for them anymore ^_^)

i use kaomojis just for funsies if im bein real,,, i do not use them That Much outside of this blog :p u can def see my typing style changing over the course of this blog,,, um!! my bad lolz!!!

[i8jisoo]

𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐘 𝐊𝐈𝐃𝐒 ⇉ skz with pregnant!reader 

hyunjin x reader | part four of dad!skz

↬ genre; fluff

↬ warnings; pregnancy, lots of cursing (i have a streak), birth, n kkami bein a meanie

↬ notes; ok this might be my fav in the series | 1.5k wc

u and hyunjin actually were broken up when u found out about the pregnancy

u waited (stalled fuck off) until five months since u really didnt know what to do with the news

u kinda feel like ur insane, playing your ex-boyfriends music constantly and watching interviews of him but it kept u company and gave u a reminder that u still needed to tell him

u got this rly cute popped out bump, just rly kinda like those movies but u know its gonna get bigger and grow to have stretch marks

one day ur just sitting on the sofa of your apartment n the next thing u know ur door is being opened and hyunjin is barging in

ofc ur in a sports bras and a pair of basketball shorts cause they r comfortable and shirts r overrated

ur there with set out marshmallows, graham crackers, and chocolate, as well as peppermint sticks on the side just eating them together

ur in the middle of eating a smore u had put together

u swallow ur smore slowly, sucking on ur fingertips n just staring at him

“oh my fucking god- and it’s true?” 

ur honestly so confused until u remember u dont have on a shirt n ur bump is showing

ur standing up in a millisecond, hyunjin getting more upset by the second just looking at u

“why— how? how could you just not tell me?”

baby boy has those angry tears and the strained voice hes just so upset and the guilt is setting in for u

“i’m five and a half months.” 

fuck hormones cause next thing u know ur crying and u cant do anything to make it stop

u guys really can’t be mad at each-other, ur relationship was filled with nothing but kindness and it ended only because u two felt it was going no where

ofc u two argued about it and in the end hyunjin was the one who walked out

“we can try again. you can move back in right? we can stay together and put back the pieces.”

u agreed n by the next morning he was there to help u pack ur things up n take them back to his place

he ends up seeing the box of baby stuff, with unopened bottle packages and sonograms, as well as a disc that was labelled as your 3D ultrasound

u find him just sitting there, staring at the black and white sonogram with tears freely falling down his cheeks

he doesn't even notice u next to him until ur thumb swipes the tear away from his cheek

u two just smile at each-other, his arm wrapping around u n pulling u in to his side

“that’s our baby?” he asks, not removing his eyes from the little white blob that barely was the size of a jaw breaker n u just whispered, “yea, it is.”

ur relationship doesn’t exactly get back into what it was at first,,

ur both nervous and cautious around each other

at first he insists he can just sleep on the couch so u can take his bed but u insist u both can sleep together

hyunjin doesn’t mean to but he somehow always winds up with his arm around u n ur bump every morning

he will talk to the bump n tell them how they r gonna have the best mommy n daddy 🥺

“did u know ur mommy is one of my favorite people to be with? i know ur gonna hear the story one day of how we became parents but i have always loved her, even when we weren’t together i loved your mommy. i hope one day you will love someone as much as i love your mommy, i hope you get your mommy’s personality bub.”

ur fake sleeping wbk but u dont move so u can let him talk

around eight months u two are way more comfortable n are getting closer

he lets u borrow his clothes because u used to do that even when u weren’t pregnant and he figured they were more comfortable & better looking than ur maternity outfits 😣

he rly goes the whole nine yards, buying anything u can think of for the baby n he’ll sometimes wake u up from ur sleep (if he’s rly excited) just so he can show u what he bought

hyunjin is in love with u and kkami cuddling together

also when ur due date got closer u both def went out for walks with kkami or played in the dog park with kkami

(u couldn’t really be as active as hyunjin but it was fine with u just watching)

something within hyunjin changes n he just gets so shy n flustered around u ^.^

he’s crushing so hard on u and u can guess he is but then again u two were just living together for the pregnancy

it’s probably three in the morning n hyunjin had just came home

ofc u were crying

a rly cute dog ad was playing with a baby in it as well :(

u explain n hiccup while doing so

hes so s o f t at this moment

he presses a soft kiss to ur lips n ur like wow thats um—

he doesn’t even care how shocked u r this man goes back in for more kisses

“i want you, i wanna be a real family. i wanna one day marry you, have more babies or get other dogs, that’s all i’ve ever wanted since the day we met.”

enywayz u two r dating,, a g a i n

spooning half of the time during ur last few weeks of pregnancy, but the boys come over frequently n for some reason jeongin is always bringing presents?? its cute but u guys RLY didn’t need anymore toys for the baby

u guys r just cuddling n he’s got one hand on ur bump before ur like

“ow,, fuck that hurt.”

“hey don’t swear around the baby!”

u just suppose it’s a hard kick since the baby had been active a lot recently n the pains had been occurring often

kkami is very cuddly today n he’s giving u kisses

hyunjin lowkey jealous cause kkami doesn’t ever give him kisses like that  ⸜( ⌓̈ )⸝

yall ever seen the thing where dogs know pregnant people the best n they can like SENSE something goin on??

well kkami was on it 

baby kkami is sniffing u n just restless in ur lap n its a lil weird cause kkami is ALWAYS sleeping or sitting still cause kkami has turned as lazy as u n hyunjin

u have this feeling but instead u just tell hyunjin u gotta pee :P

newsflash: u didnt n as soon as u got up, boom, theres ur water breaking and running down ur leg

“it feels gross.”

ur literally whining about ur pants while a baby is coming out of ur ... hooha 😳 n hyunjin is freaking out

he’s rushing around the rooms n making sure everything is in the bag and nothing gets left behind

last thing on his mind is changing ur clothes

though he does, putting u in his baggy sweatshirt and a pair of his shorts

hes freaking out lets be honest the thought of u giving birth is fuckin scary

hyunjin is so out of it and spaced out while ur cool n talking normally with pauses everytime theres a contraction

“aish, why are you so worried? i’m the one that should be worried!!”

ur not cool after an u hit the four hours in labor mark

u do not want to be t o u c h e d

touching u is off limits ur so sweaty n ur body feels like its crumbling u cannot deal with someone holding ur hand or holding u

hyunjin just sits there

hes kinda in a different realm while he stares at the clock on the wall

hes so ready to meet the baby but apparently ur body was exactly 4 centimetres not ready :(

hes just trying to distract u by talking with the boys n his other friends, all of the face timing to talk to the parents to be 🥺

yall r wrapping up a call with jeongin when u have the built up pressure feeling again

he doesn’t even explain to jeongin hes so quickly to hang up n ask u whats wrong

“i— it feels like i have to push.”

he’s already pressing the pretty lil white button on ur bed for the nurses n doctors

they confirm that u indeed r ready to push and that the baby is in position

hyunjin trying to take a peek WHAT A WEIRDO

yall hearing ur baby has a head full of hair and u just give hyunjin this look

like WTF no wonder why u had so much heartburn its because of ur fuckin rapunzel baby daddy

here comes the cries, loud n u just heard the quietest sob from beside u which was hyunjin

“it’s a baby boy, congrats!!”

his lil puppy baby boy 🥺

he had a lil pout like his daddy n his brown locks on top of his head

it was kinda creepy how similar they looked

anyways u dont care ur lil boy is p e r f e c t and nobody could dare tell yall different

u would disagree anyways because thats ur lil pouty baby boy n hes so cute 🥺

“we got a pretty good break-up story right? one for the books.”

he’s got baby boy in his arms bundled up but that doesn’t stop u from smacking his arm before kissing him quickly

“yea, we do.”

©️ maysdiors 2020 :: all rights reserved. do not repost my work on tumblr or other platforms.

[adcres]

         howdy hey , pardnerrrs :> i’m rox ( she / her ) ‘n i’ll be playing yr residential sullen broodin’ boy , nico . i didn’t have the time to write out a whole new intro , given that i have back to back classes again today :-’( , so please forgive me for recycling his old intro akawodkgrsd ; . that being said , i did tweak around some tingz and i updated his wcs for him , so if yr down to clown around just hmu on my discord :   𝔰𝔴𝔢𝔢𝔱 𝔦𝔫𝔰𝔬𝔪𝔫𝔦𝔞#2854 !  okie okie , i’ll shut da eff up now ♡ 

BASICS.

༉‧₊˚✧ kim taehyung , cis man , he / him / his — did you see that nicholas “nico” yoon was trending last night ? the twenty three year old street artist has been getting a lot of press lately . i think it’s due to them being so + quixotic & + free-spirited , but i always thought they seemed - withdrawn & - sybaritic . their fans always say they remind them of soft smoke rings spun in a dreamy haze , silver-ringed fingers rapping against polished oak , and waning light refracting against broken glass though . i wonder if they’ve found out about REDACTED yet … i guess we’ll have to wait and see . [ rox , 22 , pst , she / her , none ]

PINTEREST & PLAYLIST .

01 and 02 .

PERSONALITY .

at first glance , nico reads as this aloof , arrogant type that doesn’t like to associate w the common public . always keeping the majority of people at a comfortable distance , nico moves almost exclusively within his own social network , and doesn’t like to deviate from what he knows best .  

not so much pretentious as he is lazy , making an effort to socialize with complete strangers is simply something that nico would never do . hehe ... he’s kind of shy like that .... ♡ though he’d literally never admit it ♡

despite giving the impression that he’s some intimidating and chronically indifferent kind of guy , nico is genuinely a sweet boy — ‏‏‎ one who’s in a constant state of confusion as to why people seem to be so scared of him . it always comes as a shock when close friends of his admit that they thought he absolutely hated their guts when they first met him .

b/c tho he’s p smart , nico is very oblivious at times , and he’s 100% the kind of guy who’ll walk away from a conversation thinking he did a rly rly good job trying to make a friend ... when in reality he prob said four words in the span of thirty minutes smh .

overall , nico’s a private person , especially with what he’s thinking ... and it’s really hard to get a clear read on what’s on his mind . sharing his feelings has never been one of nico’s interests b/c he just genuinely doesn’t think whatever he has to say is rly worth mentioning . so he usually just shuts da fuck up n lets other ppl talk so he can mentally gain the strength to continue socializing .

push nico’s buttons enough tho ‘n you’ll catch this mf speaking in full sentences .

lastly , it should b noted that nico is a romantic through n through ... this mf probably d*ed in the victorian era ‘n got reincarnated b/c he’s got that ‘ lets share furtive glances across the room but never say a thing to each other  ‘ thing on lock . mr. darcy headass

and while nico might play the role of long-suffering , ever pining lover to a T , he’s more in love w / the idea of love than he is w / any single person . and he literally cannot hold down a relationship w/o fucking it up for himself in some shape or form .

kind of sarcastic ... v much the teasing type .... 

can b very impulsive at times , loves to go on solo adventures at night , prefers his own company tbh ...

overview : melancholic , reticent , noncommittal , humble , mild-mannered , romantic .

a mix of : josh from clueless and j.d. from heathers

more here .

MORE AESTHETICS.

the chill of silver jewelry against flushed skin , forgotten graffiti on porcelain sinks , flickering motel lights , kisses sticky with vodka , eyes ringed with lavender , sleepless nights surrendered to the dull buzz of television , obscure art house films , sun-kissed cheeks , the surprise of summer rain , chest aching with lost loves , scattered baby’s breath and rosemary , and a shared smile between perfect strangers .

CHARACTER DISSERTATION.

nico was born on a brisk wintry morning in the fashion district of los angeles ( january 21st , 1997 ) to a family of six .

as the second youngest child , and the only male son to boot , nico grew up with his only inheritance being a generational kind of hunger , one that demanded for more than what his struggling parents could offer

the arts stole nico at an early age ... ushering him into a world of creation and freedom beyond the four bleak walls he daily occupied . from spending lonely summers tucked away in some forgotten corner in the library to practicing on a borrowed violin from dawn to dusk , nico knew that even with nothing at his disposal , there was always something to be made w/ the tools he’d been given  

despite not having the money for private tutors to hone their son’s growing artistic talents , his parents did whatever they could to support his dreams , whether that meant working double shifts back to back or scrounging for loose change underneath the sofa cushions to pay for whatever materials nico needed .

it was in this strange way that nico grew up p spoiled . somehow having nothing while also having absolutely everything at the same time .

very much a family man , the first big purchase nico made once he broke out in hollywood was a house in beverly hills for his parents . now that he’s finally at a place where he can take care of his family , nico makes sure that his parents and sisters want for nothing

while he showers everyone else with generous gifts and obscene amounts of money , nico doesn’t particularly feel comfortable doing the same for himself . he’s a simple man through n through . one who’s content to spend his time walking his dog late at night , listening to a podcast on his airpods , instead of going out to a club w/ other well-known socialites .

a true artist at heart , nico refuses to conform to the current trends of hollywood , instead insisting on wearing thrifted clothes to important galas — ‏‏‎much to the frustration of his PR team and the chagrin of his stylists . but none of the choices nico makes seems to surprise anyone anymore . driving flashy cars and wearing designer clothes has never really been his style , after all . and it’s important to him that he remain authentically himself despite everything .

WANTED CONNECTS.

pr relationship ( open ) : someone that nico is contractually obligated to date ... i could totally see there being drama ‘n tension from having to pretend to actually like each other ... would b better if they rly did not like each other at all ... 

fwb ( open ) : buddies who bump uglies sometimes ... they both agreed they’d never catch feelings for each other but we’ll see ... 

frenemies ( open ) : someone that grinds nico’s gears but they’re a friend of his friend ... so they’re forced to keep it civil . i can see them exchanging hateful comments in the back of their friend’s car while simultaneously posting pics of each other on ig to keep up the rouse . 

unrequited crush ( open ) : likely nico would not realize if yr muse had a crush on them ... but it’d be fun to play it out like a kdrama anyway heh heh

a close friend group ( open / any ) : i thought it’d b so cute if there was like a small group of friends , maybe 3-4 ppl , that do stupid shit like ditch going to celebrity after-parties to break into abandoned buildings , get real high , ask stupid ‘ would u rather ‘ questions , and do sum main character type shit ... yk what im puttin down ... ‘n nico is def the type to open up in the presence of extroverts so i think having a group of wild outsiders of diff bgs would b v inch resting ..

enemies / rivals ( open / any ) : tbh nico prob rubs ppl the wrong way since he has resting bitch face ‘n never wants to talk to anyone .. so im sure there r ppl who just do not like this mf ... and rest assured that the feeling is mutual ...

bad / good influence ( open / any ) : nico’s known to mount his high horse often ... mr morality over here ... so i just know he prob would butt heads w/ the residential troublemaker . tho nico’s artwork can be controversial and out of the box at times , his art style and his personality are at constant odds , and it’d b interesting to have that bad influence / good influence dynamic w/ someone .

family friend ( open ) : someone who grew up w/ nico in dtla ... couldve gone to the same public school as him ... or their families couldve gone to the same church ...

ok my intro post has become a fucking behemoth so im going to stop here ‘n just say i have so many more wcs in mind so if u wanna plot lets just talk hehe :>

[all-hail-mono-onion]

how bout 34? for the ask game

BITCH 👏 I 👏 HAVE 👏 BEEN 👏 WAITING 👏 FOR 👏 THIS 👏 ONE

34. What was the last dream you had?

tw for mild sexual harassment by elon musk tw gnomes tw riverdale (gag), also season 4 spoilers if u haven’t gotten there

the last dream i remember having was a fucking TRIP dude. anyway i can’t remember what happens in the very beginning but me and another woman go to a meeting with elon musk (and i’m like 25 and tall and blonde so basically the opposite of real life... it’s weird) and then we talk about business idr what the actual meeting was about EXCEPT that i said i had a penis and elon musk didn’t care but then i revealed that i actually DIDN’T have a penis and then he said “yo you wanna see mine” and me n the other girl were like ok and we went to elon musk’s bed but we didn’t do anything we kinda just sat there but at the end elon showed me that he had taken a picture of my (white lady) butt and he threatened to leak it but i lied and said i was an attorney and i’d sue so he got really scared and i think this is where the next dream begins.

so i was in my house at my desk talking to my mom (and i look like myself now) and i didn’t have pants on i just had a rly big shirt and the windows were open and MRS STEIN (my old kindergarten teacher whom i haven’t seen in ten years) like puts her face up to the window and waves and i have to smile and wave with my mom while hiding the fact that i’m not wearing pants anyway mrs. stein’s whole family comes over and by this time i’m wearing pants so anyway there r these three little kids and i never meet one of them bc i stay in the study but anyway this first kid is sad so i get him a huge balloon bundle from the balloon cupboard (which is like this huge storage section in the top of the wall behind my desk filled with super old inflated balloons that somehow haven’t deflated yet (the second little kid sees this and she asks how they haven’t been deflated and i said the storage space keeps it from deflating). anyway then the mom (like mrs. steins sister or niece or smth idk) who looks exactly like aunt cricket from season 4 of riverdale comes over and talks to me and she says that the way the balloon storage preserves the balloon integrity reminds her of her own jewelry boxes that are really large and make sure the jewelry doesn’t dull or rust. those jewelry boxes come into play later.

anyway mrs. stein’s family gets kicked out of our house bc the third kid that i never actually see ate a bunch of our cake without asking. then the dream transitions into the next scene which is in a weird basement looking area where a scene from riverdale season 4 is playing out but it’s not actually what happened it’s what i think WOULD have happened if jughead hadn’t faked his death and just been alive the whole time. so it’s basically a courtroom scene where betty and jughead r explaining how the kids from stonewall r actually the ones who tried to kill him and frame betty for it except it’s not in a courtroom it’s in a weird dimly lit basement. and i’m like omnipresent so i’m not actually in the scene but i can see everything that’s going on.

anyway betty is presenting the case but she says something (i can’t remember what she says) and cheryl stands up and calls out this mariachi-style band and they start playing VERY weird, jarring music like carnival music on crack and everyone around them except cheryl forgets what they were doing and just stares blankly but not me because i’m omniscient so me, cheryl, and the band are the only ones who kind of know what’s going on. anyway cheryl does this so that she can speak her mind (and it’s weird bc it has nothing to do with the actual hearing it’s just her telling a story about her childhood) and basically she would tell a part of the story and then when ppl started becoming fully conscious again she’d make the band play again and it was like a loop but each time she would tell a new part of the story.

so the story was how her parents were forcibly separated from each other at a young age (and this is not from the show this is just my brain) and her aunt (I RECOGNIZED HER AUNT AS THE LADY WHO TALKED TO ME ABOUT JEWELRY IN MY HOUSE because when cheryl told the story it had like graphics to accompany it like a fever dream) anyway her aunt had weird powers so she would “poison” cheryl’s family’s food to make any food (but she specifically mentioned chinese food, so it made dream-me think her aunt was kinda racist) taste like blood. except her mom’s cooking, so that all the kids would want their moms cooking instead of literally any other food. cheryls mom was also in on it.

AND IT TURNS OUT that they were eating GNOMES (in my dream she said goblins but they had tiny hats and everything so when i woke up i realized they were actually gnomes) and those gnomes were being stored in HER AUNT’S JEWELRY BOXES. and that’s where the jewelry boxes come into play.

then there’s an additional scene right after that (like at the end) where it seems like a couple of days had passed since the hearing and i was corporeal again so i had a body and it looked like me. i was in my study and i opened my balloon storage compartment (which doesn’t actually exist in real life but it was pretty prominent in the dream) and THERE WERE A BUNCH OF BIG JEWELRY BOXES CRAMMED WITH LIVE GNOMES AND IT WAS SO SCARRING and then i woke up.

enjoy

[softbeej]

Hey how do u think beej would go about, ahem, convincing his s/o to be louder in bed? Like, they always enjoy themselves with him, but they arent particularly vocal about it by habit. Dear old juicebox just feels like the type that would rly wanna hear u go crazy for him, you know?

ABSOLUTELY

- he LOVE LOVE LOVES to hear how good he makes u feel

- BOOSTS HIS EGO !!! SO MUCH !!! it makes him feel so good about himself

- so when he realises you arent the loudest in bed

- he knows he has to change that

- he’ll be fucking you and his moans, grunts and curses will be filling the room

- but he wants to hear it from you

- “who’s making you feel this good, babes?”

- “you are, BJ” you reply all breathlessly

- “louder” he’ll grunt and this is SUCH a turn on hearing him sound all husky

- “you’re making me feel good, Beej...” you say a little louder

- he’s gripping your hips and fucking you *so* hard

- you’re starting to moan now and its making his dick twitch

- “am i the only person who makes you feel like this?” he’s ASKING for an ego boost at this point

- “yeah BJ... your cock fills me up so good...”

- DIRTY TALK IS SUCH A TURN ON FOR HIM

- at this point you’re both moaning so loud

- “i want you to cum for me, y/n” he leans over to whisper in your ear

- the sound of his voice sends shivers down your spine and you cum almost immediately

- you literally YELL his name over and over through gasps of air

- the feeling of you tighen around his length sends him over and he cums in you, moaning just as loud

my ask box is open!!

[rainbowkosmos]

Thoughts on Love Yourself: Tear

i’ve been listening to this album nonstop for over a week now, but I really want to organize some of my thoughts so Here We Go

(this is very long and i’m sorry)

Singularity:

This one has been out for a while and it was slow to grow on me, but now I really like it. it’s dark, sort of haunting, the kind of song that’s good for playing low at 3 am.

“감싸 보려하지만” especially sounds really good.

god this style of music suits taehyung so well. i also think this is definitely a song that is enhanced by it’s music video.

I just wanna talk for a sec about how Namjoon has had a hand in writing all three LY intros so far and how they’re all fuckin amazing

Fake Love:

I love the descending eerie “ding ding ding ding” in the background of this song. It just adds so much character.

whenever i sing this I try to sing “fake love” and then the fanchant “fake love” in the same verse lmao

“love you so bad, love you so bad, 널 위해 예쁜 거짓을 빚어내” is probably my favourite part of the song, it sound so good

also shoutout to namjoon who has two verses in this song and kills them both

jin sounds fantastic on the chorus. he really shines on this song- the way he sings “fake love” is just so pleasing to the ear.

the structure of this song is really weird. like, I don’t hate it, i actually kind of like it, but I wish they had pulled back for an instrumental break after “I just know why, it’s all fake love” and maybe built the song back up again with the “ding ding ding ding”s. it could have used the break in vocals imo.

The Truth Untold

I cried the first time I heard this song and it was 99% because of the rawness of these vocals.

god listen to jin on his first verse.

Jimin sounds beautiful on this song. jimin sounds beautiful always tbh but it’s especially noticeable here, and a lot of my favourite jimin moments from this album are on this track

“you know that I can’t show you me, give you me” i haven’t been fine since i first heard these lyrics

the connection between the first three songs (talk of masks, blooming flowers, hiding oneself) is pretty incredible tbh.

can you believe this is a steve aoki song? i can’t. well done to him for stepping outside the box.

“and i still want you” did????? i ask??????

134340

ngl this is probably my least favourite song on the album, but I can still appreciate it for it’s lyrical cleverness and the frankly amazing flute.

“Us is the plural form of U” i just. really fuckin love namjoon.

I will say, i really like the pre-chorus on this song, the “난 맴돌고만 있어“ bit. it sounds so... adventurous? idk when i first heard this song I was driving through really heavy fog at 3:30 in the morning and i honestly felt like i’d been transported back to the dawn of the dinosaurs and was about to run into a triceratops. anyway, moving on.

Paradise

Okay lyrically, this song is one of my favourites on the album, but instrumentally, it just can’t hold my attention. there’s nothing about it that grabs me except for the “Stop running for nothing, my friend” near the end. as it is, i really love the lyrics, and it has a message that i’m clinging to right now.

“We deserve a life, 뭐가 크건 작건 그냥 너는 너잖어” (whether big or small, you are just you) namjoon is like dr seuss for 20 year olds i love it

“꿈이 없어도 괜찮아” thank u bts this is a message i need rn

yoongi often raps like he’s pulled his verses straight out of my own thoughts and this one is no different. it’s kind of comforting, honestly.

why are he and hoseok turning into the same person though. like on this song and a few others, they trade verses seamlessly and it’s frankly kind of eerie.

this entire album is so cohesive though.

너를 이루는 모든 언어는 이미 낙원에 i kind of really love this line. it’s gorgeous. “every language that makes you is already in paradise”.

Love Maze

I feel like I haven’t explored this song lyrically enough, but I do like it. I especially like how defiant it sounds. Where it’s placed on the album feels very fitting.

“Love ain't a business, rather like a fitness” “Love is a maze damn, but you is amaze” goddamnit namjoon why do i love these lyrics so much

“baby, just don’t give a damn” seokjin.

tbh that’s all i have to say

that really warped sound that becomes prominent in yoongi’s verse is so cool and adds so much character and atmosphere to the song

also the reference to paradise after the last song was actually called paradise is a nice touch and again, makes this album feel like a story with a beginning, a middle and an end.

i’m really sorry. I know the actual lyrics in hoseok’s verse are “와 있고” but it 100% sounds like “white girl” and that’s all I ever hear when i listen to the song.

it’s interesting to me that some people say this song is romantic, whereas others say it’s about the relationship between bts and their fans. what i love about bts’s lyrics is they often leave a lot of things up for interpretation, and i don’t think they’d be bothered by either viewpoint.

Magic Shop

alright this is one of my favourite songs on the album and i have a Lot to say

i have the lyrics to this song saved on my phone so that i can go and look at them whenever i’m feeling down

also if a song is ‘atmospheric’ enough, i associate colours/images with them in my head, and magic shop is one of the most beautiful songs i’ve ever “seen”.

“So show me (I’ll show you)” is gonna be so fuckin powerful at concerts i can just tell

isn’t hoseok’s verse from his thank you in HYYH pt 1? ugh their minds

also hoseok sounds gorgeous here

the little “ey ey“s in yoongi’s verse please i love

and then there’s a reference to The Last here, but it’s written in a much gentler way and with a flip to it. god i love this song.

and then it goes back to hoseok rly quickly before the chorus again and have i mentioned how much i adore the way sope just fits together on this album

there’s something so calming about this song that just quiets my head for a few minutes

“you gave me the best of me, so you’ll give you the best of you” these are my favourite lyrics on the entire goddamn album, they’re just so impactful. a: a throwback to best of me, and b: a reminder to their fans that they should love themselves as much as they love bts (i’m trying, okay).

before we move on, I want to mention that Magic Shop marks a very obvious tonal shift in the album, the previous songs have all been sad, bitter, defiant, dark. there’s a consistent theme of hiding yourself behind a mask and worrying you won’t be loved (by others or yourself) if you take that mask off. in Magic Shop, the tone finally grows vulnerable, they talk of past fears, of using the “magic shop” to trade worries for happiness, and the rest of the album (until the outro) is going to be tonally more upbeat. this is not a coincidence.

Airplane Part 2

i’m not gonna lie, airplane was my least favourite song on hope world, but this? this is a fucking Jam.

the first time i heard this my mouth genuinely dropped open when jk started singing lmao

kings of singing latin pop in korean

okay jin and namjoon trading off lines is one of the most iconic parts of this entire album

EL MARIACHI

EL MARIACHI

EL MARIACHI

and then yoongi and jimin trading lines? also iconic. the rap and vocal lines worked so well on this album and it truly shows on songs like this.

this song ends on what feels like an unfinished note. like the structure here is weird too. is there a bridge?? i don’t feel like there is???

Anpanman

I LOVE THIS SONG SO MUCH

i remember listening to this for the first time and just laughing through the whole thing bc i was so delighted

this is a song where taehyung sounds very much in his element, but in a different way from singularity

this just feels like classic bangtan to me and it makes me so happy

“keep ballin ballin, still bangtan” there is something about this line that makes me smile so much.

“눈 뜨니 hero but still in 미로” interesting. “still in a maze”- is this a reference to love maze or am i overthinking things.

also this song seems all light and fluffy on the outside until u remember that anpanman was a hero made of bread who gave parts of himself to others to make them happy and then the rapline all get a turn singing “i’m a new generation anpanman”.... i see. pls don’t do what the old generation anpanman did.

even though things have gotten tonally lighter there are still dark undertones here and that comes to a head later in the outro

i fucking love jk’s verse in this song, it might be my favourite of his on the entire album

i stan a band of Nerds

So What

this is a very surface song that i enjoy jamming to in my car, but have no thoughts on it beyond that haha

i laugh every time one of them uses “bae” in a song bc it just sounds... off

“고민보다 Go Go” god i love it when they reference their older songs

this may not have been as surface as i thought it was upon closer examination of the lyrics. idk what i was expecting tbh like, this is bts.

“hope world, let’s go” that’s fantastic

tbh this might be one of my favourite hoseok verses on the album

wait so namjoon’s not saying “i wanna die right now”? i just now figured that out.

the last minute and a half of this song simply did not need to be there

Outro: Tear

i saw someone say that the instrumental for this belongs in a movie score and i 100% agree

namjoon goes the fuck off in this song like holy shit it’s been a while

and then he repeats “you’re my tear” three times, which alone isn’t interesting but is made interesting by the fact that when rapline comes together later, this bit is changed

okay this is my favourite hoseok verse on the album

and then again with the seamless transition to yoongi! god i’m curious as to why they decided to structure their verses like that, as far as I can remember they haven’t done this before and i really like this stylistic choice because they compliment each other so well.

“we thought we dreamed the same dream, but that dream has finally become a dream“ goddamn

this song sounds so raw, like the truth untold sounded raw too, but I really liked that this album had a vocal and a rap line track to showcase how music can sound vulnerable in different ways.

OKAY here it is, one of my absolute favourite pieces of wordplay (that i can understand) on the album

namjoon says “you’re my tear,” just like he did earlier. yoongi follows that up with “you’re my tear” but he uses the other pronunciation, changing the meaning to “you’re my tear (as in, tearing something).” then hoseok comes in and rhymes “fear” with namjoon’s pronunciation of tear. these are god tier (lmao i can wordplay too) lyrics my friends.

god i love yoongi’s verse so much. first the autotune, then the layering of autotune and his lower register (which he’s used so much more on this album and i adore it) like he switches things up so well and he’s such a versatile rapper i’m literally constantly floored by him.

and then there’s another really nice transition from namjoon to yoongi. what i like about bts’s rapline is that hoseok and yoongi sound really good together, but their higher rapping styles compliment namjoon’s deeper voice so well.

i just need you all to know that the first time i listened to this song i was driving at four am and it’s a good thing i was alone bc when yoongi started singing on the bridge i literally shrieked ‘fUCK’ and clapped a hand over my mouth

hoseok was a fuckin brilliant way to finish this album off, he gives this last verse the emotion and speed it needs and i love it. they’re all good at rapping over instrumental pieces like this but there’s something about hoseok (he did it in boy meets evil too) that just drives home the emotion.

and breathe.

Standout Things:

The cohesive storyline within a larger storyline

Love Yourself: Tear is almost what I would call a concept album, which is classified as an album that is "unified by a theme, which can be instrumental, compositional, narrative, or lyrical.” (yes i got that from wikipedia, but the point stands because there’s definitely a concept here.) Love Yourself: Her also falls within the larger storyline of the Love Yourself era (the rise, fall and resolution of love) but I wouldn’t classify that as a concept album in the same way. Sure, a few of it’s songs dealt with the same sort of ideas, a love that was destined by fate, but a few others veered wildly off of that course. Love Yourself Tear remains steady on it’s concept of masks, pain, self love, giving too much to other people and how to be an idol and still love and be loved for your true self. There’s truly a story being told here and I love it.

The metaphors

Kpop love songs usually do nothing for me, but BTS has been getting a lot better at writing them lately, and what I really liked about the romantic songs on this album is that they were explored using metaphors and references to old stories. 134340 refers to both Pluto and Hades to make it’s point. Love Maze weaves a picture of a dark maze with no way out. The Truth Untold references the smeraldo flower. Even the non romantic songs tell a story in a roundabout way- Anpanman and Magic Shop are both for the fans, one is built around a superhero, the other a psychological technique used in therapy to change one’s way of thinking. The writing on this album has matured greatly and it really makes you think about what they’re saying.

Yoongi’s style experimentation

There were a couple times while listening to this album that I had to take a moment to go “wait, is that Yoongi?” I’m rather used to Yoongi rapping in a certain way. his style-   occasionally cocky, occasionally bitter, usually high toned, fast and emotional- is pretty distinct, and for the most part, he ditched that on this album in favour of a style that’s more mellowed out and lower pitched. he experimented with autotune, sound effects and even singing and i think his experimentation paid off, because he was one of the most memorable parts about this album for me.

Namjoon’s writing

Namjoon is a phenomenal lyricist, we all know that, but every single verse of his on this album stood out to me in some way or another. he had a hand in writing/producing every single song on this album, and i could really see his influence all over it. I just love words and well written lines, and there are so many lines on this album, particularly in Namjoon’s verses that just make me stop for a moment so I can just appreciate the beauty.

Magic Shop’s themes

This. Song.

First of all, the concept of the “magic shop” is such a cool idea for a song, and the way they incorporated it is actually really clever? It’s literally a therapeutic song, because it is a real psychological technique and they’re saying ‘we’ll be your happiness, just come to the “magic shop” and trade in your worries, you’ll be okay’. but, it goes further than “we’ll fix you!!!” with the line “You gave me the best of me, so you’ll give you the best of you”. Here, they encourage their fans to find the “best of themselves”. Basically, saying “love yourself as much as you’ve loved me”. god this is so good.

I have to mention that this song just sounds magical. There’s a calming, celestial vibe to it that A: fits with the rest of the album up until that point and B: acts as a bridge between the rather sad first half of the album and the more upbeat second half.

Bangtan’s chemistry

A minor problem I had with a few of BTS’s older albums was the disconnect between members. (not in person, just in their music). They were all singing on the same tracks, but it didn’t always feel very cohesive. Wings especially (although it remains my favourite Bangtan album) felt like a bunch of separate artists got together and decided to make an album (an amazing album and that style really worked for them at the time, but i digress). On this album, BTS finally feels like a band.  Sure, I praise both the rap and vocal line separately for the truth untold and outro tear, but I’ve never heard BTS sound so strong as a group. The rapping and the vocals felt seamless- there were so many times where they rapidly went back and forth between members, or shared lines, or harmonized beautifully. It rarely, if ever, felt like the vocal line ft: rapline, or the other way around. They blend the two so well these days, from Jungkook and Namjoon’s bit in Fake Love to Yoongi and Jimin during Airplane Part 2. I’m honestly delighted at how well this album works as a whole. Those eight years of living and working together have really paid off for them.

Overall: Love Yourself Tear is a beautiful piece of music that shows a more mature side of BTS. It’s flaws- lack of energy in the middle of the album, more autotune than their previous works, occasionally hard to follow song structure- are not even so much flaws as they are stylistic choices that I can respect. It is a phenomenal 2nd part of a 3 part act, and I eagerly await Love Yourself: Answer for the conclusion of this story, and to see where BTS will take their ever-evolving sound next.

Rating: 9/10.

[ua-monoma]

[[ hi here’s a text convo me and dani were having during the iimono text convo woohoo feelings ]]

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 4:16 AM

iida's definition of alright is "im not completely hurting to the point where it is hard to do or think abt anything else"

rickyLast Sunday at 4:17 AM

THATS A BAD DEFINITION IIDA

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 4:17 AM

if he can do his duties without being hindered he's "alright"

rickyLast Sunday at 4:18 AM

like tbh monoma's big feels rn are like 

 1) i wanna communicate but it feels like iida doesnt actually communicate with me ever 

2) i wanna be honest but it feels like iida isnt being honest with me 

3) i've been opening up a lot which im! proud of!! i can face my emotions now! but iida isnt facing HIS emotions with me and i thought uHh being a couple means we do that together so i guess i'll go fuck myselfsdfskhdgbg

but ALSO from an outside perspective iida Does Communicate and Is Honest... way more than monoma perceives it but monoma sucks. at being able to identify it

A L S O he cant stand iida taking care of him so much sfhgbsfbhsg hes starting to feel rly coddled and he Does Not Like It

and thats largely just cuz hes so unstable and feels guilty about it now that hes more aware of it and wants to either just shut down and stop emoting around iida or, like, he wants to get to take care of iida if/when he ever breaks down cuz then it'll be Equals

kdfgdfhbdfgs i just had a hunch and it was right, monoma is actually older than iida sdfbjhgs

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 4:22 AM

WAIT HE IS

HES OLDER,

rickyLast Sunday at 4:27 AM

but yeah i think the other thing is that monoma wants stuff from iida but like has not been able to rly voice it (i feel like this is the first time he has ever talked like This Much about emotional bullshit) but also TBH he feels brushed aside every time iida gives him one of his lil speeches

cuz he doesnt respond very well to positivity and also will just latch onto the negative aspects

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 4:30 AM

WOW then u have iida whos just like "dude im not a fuckign mind reader tell me what u want"

rickyLast Sunday at 4:30 AM

WHICH I KNOW BUT HE'S WORKING ON IT.....

iida: communicate pls monoma: ok heres a big rambling post about stuff i feel iida: ok thats nice. can you communicate with me pls tho monoma: I JUST DID HSDFKGGBDFSG I'LL JUST GO FUCK MYSELF THEN I GUESS--

^ is how he feels

also hes scared of the Boyfriend Conversation

which i think i've told you before, hes scared cuz of the sex addiction thing but also,

ppl keep coercing him to sex and he doesnt wanna date iida and then be coerced into Officially Cheating,,, pseudo cheating isnt acceptable either but at least like,,, hes Technically not betraying him,

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 4:36 AM

THE RAMBLING THING isnt clear to iida bc its like yes that is how he feels but he is not telling me What He Wants From Me

rickyLast Sunday at 4:37 AM

YEAH thats what i noticed today +_+!!!

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 4:38 AM

its like monoma is offering his stance but not a solution or a compromise

rickyLast Sunday at 4:38 AM

monoma doesnt rly know that's what he's supposed to do hjbsjfsg

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 4:38 AM

does iida have to spell it out

rickyLast Sunday at 4:38 AM

y es

like, the last thing iida said kind of made monoma be like

wait lemme look at it again

ok he said he wanted to know the reasons behind his actions and monoma was like,,,,wha--

cuz... 1) theres like never actually a reason and 2) he didnt know iida wanted that from him

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 4:40 AM

H

rickyLast Sunday at 4:40 AM

like monoma barely even recognizes half his actions cuz theyre all based on impulses and tbh if nobody pointed them out he'll just move on like nothing's happened

like he compartmentalizes,,, s o much,,,,,, and then represses it like instantly like TBH

like barely anyone talks about monoma's growing alcoholism so he just keeps doing that, and no one has had the chance to tell him to stop communicating with villains so he kept doing that too but like. Because it wasnt pointed out he barely has a problem with it and can function fine

everyone harps on him for the sex stuff tho so he's just like Drowning In Guilt

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 4:44 AM

is there literally-- any way iida can actually help him because, i just , wow

rickyLast Sunday at 4:44 AM

sfjgkdfg 

iida: here's a list of questions to communicate with, pls answer monoma: dissociates instantly 

whOH YEAH DEFINITELYi know that sounds all depressing sjhsdfghthe fix is honestly super easy tbh

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 4:45 AM

HE ASKED TWO WHOLE QUESTIO-jvhcfdjsjcxsdjhds

god im glad there is indeed a fix

rickyLast Sunday at 4:45 AM

I WAS TYPING UP MORE META I HAVENT GOTTEN TO IT YET

monoma's problem is literally just that he doesnt have the vocabulary for, like, anything

what he wants is an open relationship but he doesnt know what that is and TO BE QUITE FRANK his only knowledge of one is fucking sen and kosei

so like, he's only hesitating so much cuz he doesnt know how to voice what he wants cuz Tbh monoma hates not sounding smart and being emotive means bumbling around like an idiot

he still feels brushed off tho,

iida bls be sad around him more

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:02 AM

IIDA DOESNT LIKE BEING SAD

its weird for him

he always like

how do i put this

he takes his sadness, pisses on it, and sets it on fire

rickyLast Sunday at 5:02 AM

oh God i just realized iida is doing the same thing the guy i was gay for did FUCKMeJFBJHFBGDG

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:03 AM

oh he pissed on his  sadness too? worm

rickyLast Sunday at 5:03 AM

he did the 'im alright is actually crashing and burning in super slow motion for months at a time' thing

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:03 AM

iida is hollow more often than he is sad

1JDCKCDSNHSDSNDSCJ

rickyLast Sunday at 5:05 AM

meanwhile i had the loudly has breakdowns and then gets upset about being taken care of despite him insisting because of his Fetish for taking care of people thing

me: glares at iidas Fetish

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:06 AM

ok this is more of a hc but

iida likes taking care of ppl bc his parents rarely took care of him uwus

o hes like

rickyLast Sunday at 5:07 AM

CRIES

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:07 AM

being the Dad and Mom he never had

rickyLast Sunday at 5:07 AM

waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah

see that Sucks cuz my hc is that monoma was raised to be as self sufficient as possible as Fast as possible which meant wow we aint got time for emotions fam just Put Them In A Box

oh is the box overflowing, put the BOX in a BIGGER BOX

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:08 AM

emotionally stunted boys sure are great

rickyLast Sunday at 5:08 AM

i k r

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:08 AM

only in theory tho,

rickyLast Sunday at 5:08 AM

LOL

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:08 AM

irl i wouldve just

choked them

rickyLast Sunday at 5:09 AM

sobs angrily about iida

share your emotions biiiiiiitchhhh

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:09 AM

hits the back of monoma's head

rickyLast Sunday at 5:09 AM

hEY

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:09 AM

just tell him what u want u stupid fuckJCDFJDSSD

rickyLast Sunday at 5:09 AM

HE WANTS YOU TO SHARE HIS EMOTIONS HSFBGJHFGS HE SAID THAT!!!!AND IIDA WAS LIKE, NAH

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:10 AM

IIDA ISNT RLLY THAT SURE OF HIS EMOTIONS EITHER THATS WHY!!!

HE THINKS HES THIS BUT HES ACTUALLY SOMETHING ELSE

rickyLast Sunday at 5:10 AM

THATS MONOMAS PROBLEM TOO YOU BUTT DFHBSDFGJGSG

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:10 AM

FUCK

rickyLast Sunday at 5:11 AM

OHMY

GODSTRANGLES THEM BOTH

IIMONO: FEELINGS?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!???????

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:11 AM

w iida its more like. he knows deep down but he doesnt , think , its important enough , to be addressed

rickyLast Sunday at 5:11 AM

i i d a b l s

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:11 AM

"as class rep i must be a leader before anything else!!!!!"

rickyLast Sunday at 5:12 AM

monoma is honestly like 'iida help this is the very first time in my life i have felt Guilt what am i supposed to do with this!!!!!!

iida: whats wrong monoma: IM SAD????  WHY DIDNT ANYONE EVER TELL ME WHAT A CONSEQUENCE WAS iida: ,

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:14 AM

JXVCDJXCDSAHJSDSDJ

rickyLast Sunday at 5:15 AM

and t b h he kind of is like, automatically expecting like... a Reward for getting this far but iida just kind of keeps being like 'okay cool. and what else'

and monoma is like HJSFBKHBFGS THAT TOOK ME 3 WEEKS TO FIGURE OUT B L S

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:28 AM

fuckcdncnddxjsn

rickyLast Sunday at 5:28 AM

,,,, in person or continue the text

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:29 AM

CCCCONTINUE...they rarely text god pls

rickyLast Sunday at 5:30 AM

TBH YEAH...

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:30 AM

iida has no Time for his phone he needs to read 30 chapters ahead so he doesnt fall behind!!!

rickyLast Sunday at 5:30 AM

monoma is Traumatized by all their other text convos so he doesnt--

im including the times when i post this btw because God Damn i love that its likefucking 5am over here

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:31 AM

GO TO BED?

rickyLast Sunday at 5:31 AM

this is 500% a 'im sad texting my bitchass pseudo bae about my feelings at fucking sunrise after they kept me up crying all night' conversation

whats a bed

[chenlays]

soccer player!! hyuck

requested ⭐ requests are open !! ⭐ masterlist

omg sWEET SHY sOCCER PLAYER NEIGHBOR HYUCK 👀👀 he kicks his prized n overpriced ball imported from cali into ur backyard n hes gotta get himself to ask his rly cute neighbor (tHE REAdEr) for it back (also i jus wanna think abt him in a soccer uniform n headband n like disheveled but ethereal ok)

i’ve been writing this and listening to and july on repeat for almost 2 hours

alright

you’ve been seeing a boy just aggressively enjoying soccer in his backyard from ur window for as long as u have lived at that house

he practices like every single day

so much dedication for such a lil boy

u high k e y thought he was super cute every time u would see him while going to school or just going outside

one time u were just watching him play soccer with his friends bc it was so entertaining, and he looked up at u in ur window

ofc he was nice n waved,, but he looked so smiley n proud and u closed the curtain so f a s t

neither of you have the courage to knock on the door and actually talk

but one day,,

you were doing some work and looked out the window occasionally as he was practicing again

but he seemed really,,, off

and after a while, he started to fall

it’s really hard to concentrate on work when that cute neighbor boy keeps falling and getting hurt

he ended up falling as he kicked the ball and it went sideways

into ur yard :))

he laid there for a lil bit,, probably crying

u were rly concerned so u went out in the back to get the ball

by the time you got inside he was knocking aggressivel y

like,, sCARY knockingg

u opened the door anyways bc u needed to give it back 

but when u opened the door,, he looked really nervous and like he hadn’t slept in 27 days :))

he had dark circles n a really exhausted aura abt him

but he was rly cute,, wearing shorts n some expensive shoes n a nice shirt n a cute pink headband

his small, awkward smile also just made him 903x better

and his face was g l ow i ng

his hair just stuck to it from all the gross sweat and his shirt was clinging to him but he was still goin strong

“oH uhhh,,u havE m y ball,,”

“ye a i can see that”

really awkward exchange, but he was really eager to meet u n u wanted to meet him,, so u tried to attempt conversation anyways

“unjkdnj my name is donghyuck!! i like socc er “

“i ‘ m y/n and ur rrly cute :)”

he was concerned,, but also a lil happy abt it and gave a nice laugh

and then it was so much easier to talk

he started getting his ball “stuck” in your backyard smh

u let it happen bc he was so cute and wanted to talk so bad

a lot of the time you both would just sit and eat snacks and talk about whatever you wanted

“hyuck!! did u know koalas have fingerprints”

“:o rEALLY??”

and sometimes he would let u sit in his backyard n watch him play soccer

n if we was feeling up to it, would teach u his special tricks

all of his friends know who u are n they never had to a s k

he’s so cute tho,, always takin breaks while ur doing homework or studying or smth while watching him play just to see how you’re doing and if he can help

and he!!! always tells u abt how he did something new and cool

it’s amazing bc he looks so bright and happy when he yells abt it !!!

and he sometimes worries about boring u,, but u always reassure him by saying he looks so pretty while he’s running to ur door and screaming abt how he scored twice as fast with his friends while covered in sweat and has a really dorky grin and bright eyes ufhdhg

ur the only person he trusts with his nice n expensive ball istg

and !! once the season starts,, he always begs u to come to his games

literally will serenade u

or throw a soccer ball at ur face idk

but when you do!!! he gets so giggly n happy and has so much more motivation to do his best

if you cheer for him then !! he is so smiley and encouraged

and if you don’t,, he is still so smiley and encouraged bc u took the time to go out and see him play!!

and after his game, he hugs u so tight even tho he’s sweaty n gross

and he always does his best for you !!!

“HYUC k pls i don’t wanna be covered in sweat :))”

“o h sorry” but he hugs u tighter 

and even if he doesn’t win the game, he still gives moist hugs with a wide smile and just looks genuinely happy

“i did my best!! i’m still proud even if we lost, because i did my best for you!!”

and that’s just the most uplifting thing i have ever written

but you buy him snacks and plushies and make nice cards with 74 stickers on each page for his games

and he has a special box for all ur gifts and shows you his nicely decorated shoe box with all ur favs on it !!!!

he probably spent more than ten hours just trying to figure out where to place one heart sticker

bu t

as the season ends that year, n you’ve been friends for quite a while, he feels so much more obligated to win the last game just for you !!

so he gives the whole team the stern “u better fuk i n win or i’ll fight” talk n sURPRISE

they all do their absolute best

n when hyuck sees u on the side while he’s runnin to get to the field, he stops for a second just to wave and give u a nice smile to make ur heart screech

then he just plays so aggressively yet amazin at the same time

ur just,, in awe

bc that gross sweaty boy who collapsed n got his expensive california soccer ball stuck in ur yard and came to ur doorstep in a dirty pair of shorts, a pink headband, and had dozens of scrapes on his arms n legs

with that dorky and lovable smile,, :”))

is such a cutie who loves u more than his soccer and plays his games for you 🤧🤧

and when he wins his last game, he runs over to you before even congratulating his team and hugs you s o tight

and u can hear him sniffling so u ignore the gross and hug him back 

and then he pulls away to look at u n hold ur face and just smiles so softly 

it makes u feel blessed by our lornd and savior rjesus christ

it’s almost 6am and i havent slept in almost 20 hour r ss or is my math wrogn

anyways

he just tells you how special you are to him and how loved and happy you make him feel

just by sitting in his yard and giving him a cute smile when he cheers after he scores a goal against a friend

makes him the happiest lil boy ever

and he couldn’t ever ask for a better person in his life

he loves u so much an d he’s sweatin 2i02/7

hug him and make him lemonade and love my dude

dong hi yuck

[danisnotofire]

hey im going to orientation in a few days and im rly nervous abt starting college, i was just wondering if you had any tips or any ~advice~ bc im like, lowkey freaking out ((also i also stage manage and i love musicals and astronomy (sry i was snooping around your about page)))

hey!!! ok i am so so so sorry this took so long lol i actually just went back to school myself to help out with a pre-orientation program and we’ve been having like 17 hour days so i’m Exhausted and haven’t had a lot of time to really give a thoughtful answer (UNTIL NOW). some of this is gonna sound cheesy, but this is Emma Danisnotofire’s Official Real List of Pro-Tips for College, so if it’s on here it’s true. that being said, i go to a medium/small school (4,000 students) in the middle of fucking nowhere, so some of my experiences are gonna be a lil different. most still apply. 

first off, it’s TOTALLY OKAY that you’re nervous. i know when i went i was highkey freaking out even more bc everybody else seemed to be just excited and i felt like i was the only one actually losing my mind from how scared i was. i didn’t sleep at all the night before i moved in. being scared is fine. you’ll probably be scared for awhile after you get there, too, and that’s absolutely okay. i remember it took me a solid few weeks for me to stop feeling nauseous from nerves whenever i woke up. i promise i promise this will go away. you will settle in and you’ll make friends and you’ll figure out where everything is and how things work, i PROMISE. 

second, once you get there, don’t be afraid to talk to people!! i know that sounds super cheesy and unhelpful, but seriously. talk to your orientation leaders!! they’re usually upperclassmen and 99% of the time they had to APPLY to get that position, and it’s because they’re so so excited to meet you!! i’m a mentor for this pre-o program (it’s arts-focused), and we all had to apply, and every single other mentor is super passionate not only about the arts but about making sure the incoming freshman feel comfortable and happy and at home right off the bat. we want to like you!! talk to us!!! talk to each other!! at my school, (bucknell), orientation is actually pretty fucking legendary (it’s 5 straight days of just. nonstop activities), so getting to know your group is always nice. good conversation starters include: compliment something they’re wearing/have done, mention pets, ask about what classes they’re taking. that’s usually where i start when i’m talking to my kids!! 

okay, now for some Actual Tangible Advice. most of this is actually taken from when i gave my friend natalie some advice about college, but it’s still applicable to you!! i’m putting it under a readmore bc It’s So Very Long, I’m Sorry, I Really Hope This Helps/Makes Up For Me Not Answering For So Long

-if you can, get a microwave. if you can’t, it’s nbd because there’s probably one in your dorm somewhere. but it’s really nice not to have to put on shoes/socks to go make ramen at 3am

-INVEST IN GOOD SOCKS!!!! srsly omg you’re never gonna wanna go anywhere barefoot, and dorm heating/cooling can be tricky. i treated myself to a 5-pair box where they’re all different classic art pieces. they’re GORGEOUS and super nice for when i can’t find my flip-flops.

-also, if you have birks. bring them. they are also good for sliding on when u really have to pee in the middle of the night and can’t for the life of u find anything else. also everyone i know wears birks casually (i have a 20 dollar pair of fake ones from american eagle lol)

-OLD NAVY HAS FLIP FLOPS 2 FOR 5 DOLLARS. they make the BEST shower shoes and also they come in so many lit colors they’re the bomb digs. these are also good if you don’t have a pair of birks

-if your dorm doesn’t have it already (most dorms don’t) BUY A SCREEN FOR YOUR WINDOW!!!!!!! SERIOUSLY if u hate bugs you do NOT want them coming in when all u want is some fresh air. my roommate last year brought one to school bc i didn’t even think about it and it was a LIFESAVER.

-if you can, get one of those febreeze scent things you plug in. if you aren’t allowed, there’s this thing called a scentsy that basically melts wax and it makes your room smell SO. GOOD. idk how much they cost but honestly you will be thankful you have it if you can get it (candles work too but most dorms don’t allow candles)  

-you don’t need a huge plastic shower caddy!! you can get a softer one and then hang it on a hook outside the shower or loop it around the shower knob. they’re probs better than a big hard one bc they won’t fill up with water and you can stash it easier. (i went with a big plastic one and it’s a hassle lol). however, if you already got a big plastic one, that’s cool too bc sometimes they come with a removable second smaller caddy, and that’s good for putting your phone in outside of the shower to play music.

-lofting your bed is super nice bc it gives you a little more privacy from your roommate (and privacy is so so so rare in college, esp in a dorm). it’s also nice bc if you’re up there and a friend walks into your room (which is bound to happen with dorm living, which is where i’m assuming ur living as a first-year) they won’t immediately see you, which gives you a few seconds to get ur shit together before they see you.

-HOWEVER!! there are a few downsides to lofting ur bed. the major one is that it’s a pain in the ass to not only get up there, but also to lug your laptop/charger/snacks/etc up there, and once you’re up u probably aren’t gonna wanna come down. also, i don’t know if you drink, (which btw totally cool if you don’t!!), but there was definitely one time where i was too drunk to climb into my bed (i know, i know, several bad choices were made that night and i regret all of them), but thankfully my roommate last year was a fucking goddess though (a definite Mom Friend) and pulled all my sleeping stuff down to the floor lol. it’s rare that something like that happens, but it’s definitely something u wanna take into consideration.

-college is infinitely emotionally taxing. face masks and shower bath-bombs (you put them on the floor of your shower and they slowly dissolve and release whatever scent they are) do LOADS to make u feel better. face masks are also good bonding with friends!! 

-some other self-care college tips: cafes will usually have either hot apple cider in the fall, or you can get steamed milk with vanilla in it and it’s very soothing and gentle and calming. i got it a lot when i was sick just bc it was warm and not difficult to stomach. 

-also baking. if you get a few friends and bake something, it is 1) bound to be hilarious and 2) everyone who walks by will love you. we once made cinnamon buns, except instead of individual ones we made one big disgusting MegaBon, and we still talk about it to this day. it’s the name of our group chat lmaooo

-you can literally never have too much storage. plastic bins, crates, etc. never too much.

-you will leave college with so much more stuff than what you came with. holy shit. you will also get so many t-shirts??? see above. you’ll need storage.

-college is also the definition of ‘Everything is Happening All The Time’, and ur probably gonna make friends who try and do Everything. it took me super long to internalize the fact that it’s okay to like, say no to doing something and take a nap instead. not all the time, sometimes its good to force urself out of your room, but you can stay in on a saturday every once in a while! it doesn’t matter. 

-that being said, do try and go out of your comfort zone a little!! i was definitely not the type to do this in high school, but these days i’ll sometimes go to frat parties!! they’re actually really fun when you go with friends (and always go with friends!!!). it doesn’t even necessarily need to be parties either. audition for a capella. stage manage a show. do a club sport. there’s so much you can do!! (i actually didn’t follow my own advice here last year, i was too terrified to do a lot of things. i did theatre though, which ended up taking up most of my time anyway, but i still wish i had done more, hence why i’m doing this program right now! don’t be like first-year me. be better!)

-HOWEVER here are some (frat) party tips: girls can usually get into parties much easier than guys can, but either way don’t try to go out until around october/late september. the first few weeks back are for upperclassmen catching up with friends . go with a group, and STAY with your group. please. no girl left behind. they usually only serve shitty beer, and ofc you should keep your eyes on it the whole time. if you put it down, just go get another one instead of picking that one up again. also, invest in a shitty coat/gross pair of shoes specifically to wear to the frats. the floors are gross, and you’re probs gonna end up storing your jacket behind a trash can in the winter bc it’s too fucking hot inside the room to keep it on. (is this coat thing just a bucknell thing?? this might just be a bucknell thing). 

-more drinking/etc/stuff: know your rights. RAs are not allowed to look through drawers/open closets when doing room searches, so if you have wine or anything, make sure it’s hidden in somewhere they’re not allowed to touch.

-THIS IS SUPER IMPORTANT: if someone has drank too much, BACKPACK THEM. get them into bed while wearing a filled up backpack. it prevents people from rolling over and choking on their vomit. i cannot emphasize how important it is for you to backpack someone. if you can, stay with them to make sure they’re okay. also, don’t be afraid to let them throw up before they go to bed. it helps. they’ll usually feel better. 

-if you can, get a job that lets you sit down. receptionist, librarian, etc. these are the best, bc sometimes you’ll get the  chance to study or get paid for doing nothing. also? receptionist looks SUPER good on a resume. also? money is nice.

-LOCK YOUR DOOR!!!!! I LEARNED THIS THE HARD WAY WHEN SOME WEIRD SENIOR BOY WALKED INTO MY ROOM DRUNK AT 3AM AND WOULDN’T LEAVE. also, you’ll make friends in the first week that you won’t necessarily want to be friends with later on, but they won’t get that message lol. again, lock your door (learned that the hard way, too)

-for future semesters, if you can’t get into a class right away it REALLY helps to email the professor!!! seriously, 9 times out of 10 they are more than happy to let an extra person in, because there are always students who drop the class within the first week or two. that’s how i got into astronomy my first semester, and i’m now a teacher’s assistant for it. so. really, it helps.

-the best way to be better friends with people is to just, get meals with them. honestly. make a group chat with some people and whenever ur getting dinner or lunch or whatever just throw out a ‘hey anyone wanna get food with me??’ text. 90% of the time someone will come with you.

-speaking of meals tho, ik this is the number 1 thing people tend to say, but it’s tRUE. nobody cares if you eat alone. it too me SO LONG to internalize this, but it’s totally fine to do!! it’s actually really nice sometimes, you can bring homework or your laptop and get some work done. it’s not even with meals, either! you can study alone! you can walk places alone! you can go to the gym alone! i was always terrified of being seen alone bc i thought people were gonna think i didn’t have friends or w/e dumb thing my anxiety had me feeling, (i still struggle with that lmao) but in reality you just look independent and cool!!! also, it helps to be content in the fact that you have friends and it doesn’t matter if people THINK you don’t.

-get a reusable water bottle. i got a plastic one for like 12 bucks, and i use it DAILY. if ur walking a lot, it helps keep you hydrated. also, it gives you something to do in class. also, you can personalize it with stickers and stuff (you can do the same with a laptop case). i p much take mine with me EVERYWHERE.

-this was also hard for me to internalize, but u gotta remember the fact that it’s okay not to be who u were in high school. like, i gave up some of the things i was into in high school in favor of some other things, and it took me awhile to figure out that i wasn’t like, betraying anyone, if that makes sense?? like, i started going to frat parties and actually having FUN at them??? (something i NEVER would have been into in high school, but here we are).

-also, grades are very different in college. i freaked out when i wasn’t getting a 4.0, because that’s who i was in high school, but then i kinda put it in perspective. i ended with a 3.67, which is still dean’s list. you’re not going to be perfect, bc chances are you ended up at a school with people on kinda equal intelligence levels as you. don’t freak out. 

okay that’s pretty much it!!! i can def come up with more stuff tailored to certain things/etc if you want me to talk more about this stuff!!! i love giving college advice and talking and helping people feel better about this whole thing bc i know it’s hard and scary

[i8jisoo]

𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐘 𝐊𝐈𝐃𝐒 ⇉  skz with pregnant!reader 

bangchan x reader | first part of dad!skz

↬ genre; fluff & a tinge of angst

↬ warnings; pregnancy, birth, talk of vomiting, and lots of cursin

↬ notes; fuck i love bangchan sm and im excited dis the first part of daddy!skz o whateva

from the moment he knew, he honestly was scared at first and just wanted to pretend like he wasn’t going to be a father

he needed time to evaluate it all, he was honestly confused and scared, he was nervous and doubtful of his parenting skills and providing eighteen years + many years after for his child

u were nervousssss as helllllllllllllll to tell him what was up

“well, i’m- y’know- baby?” you tried to get out, ur words were hella scrambled and he was confused before he came to the realization of what you meant 

silence which is vv concerning 

u knew this was a shot in the dark sorta, u two weren’t even public on the relationship let alone public about a pregnancy?

u guys ended up taking a break for about a month, really not knowing what to say to each-other

u two were afraid, which was normal, u just rly didn’t expect it from chan of all people to walk away from u

anybody else u could expect,, but this?? this was unlike him & u were more scared by that

he wound up at your place, box in hands

(u were kinda at ur breaking point bc u thought he was returning ur things)

(newsflash it was his stuff)

“i’m sorry, i just— being a father? being a parent, i don’t.. i don’t know anything about it, but nobody does when they become one. so, i’m gonna figure it out with you.”

going through the first sonograms w him & crying a lot while u two talked about the future

ur hormones r going to be the death of chan

u are 0-100 holy mooolyy

hes very careful with his choice of words and how he delivers them, not wanting to upset you

chans first present for the baby is a kangaroo, with a matching little joey 🥺

he also is surprisingly a very big fan of kanga from winnie the pooh, which he buys winnie the pooh stuff for the baby JSJSJSJSJJS just bc kanga & roo remind him of u n the baby 🥺🥺🥺🥺 (i rly need to stop)

u were a lil big, having a cute big bump to pair with ur pregnancy, the inevitable announcement was needed to happen if u were ever going to step outside again

chan rly didnt want to announce it bc he didnt know what peoples reactions would be :(

he knew he was only twenty-seven so some people might think it was a bit too early to have kids, but he thought it was perfect the way it was

u guys hid it until u couldn’t, sparking little rumors of ur pregnancy but u both decided not to confirm them

chan obsessing and literally worshipping you in your third trimester

u in his shirts? he was fuckin over

kisses and cuddling all the time, no matter how tired u were or he was, u two would either fall asleep while doing so or lay there for awhile before u were like

“ok i gotta pee, help me up!!”

no but frfr this baby was torturing u the last stretch of ur pregnancy

it seemed that anything u ate either made u throw up or gave u heartburn

ur stretchmarks were getting worse & it seemed like u were getting bigger everyday

u were very insecure the last months, just cause a lot of comments were talking about a bit of weight gain in ur face, which fuck,, u would never be hurt by some comments but with ur hormones and KNOWING u have put on weight, u rly didn’t feel the same

ofc chan knows whats up and hes there to tell u some r e a l s h i t

“okay, yes. you have put on weight, but you’re pregnant. that’s the good thing about it, you’re healthy okay? whether you had a small bump and no extra weight put on or a big bump and extra weight put on, you are carrying a baby. you can lose the weight when it’s over, right? you don’t need to feel this way, okay? i’m the only one who you should listen to about your appearance, i’m here to tell you the truth. you are beautiful. you are the morher of my child, that’s what you are. you’re not ugly, or fat, you’re not anything bullshit that people say to you.”

when u started crying, chan panicked

“nononononoono, don’t cry baby!”

his arms were wrapped around you so tightly, feeling your face pressed against his shoulder and your arms around his neck

“i love you.” u would be rly quiet and his heart would break at the sound but ur i love you, he just— it was so real and he’d never felt like this before

“love u too.” he’d say that shit so proudly and kiss the TOP OF UR HEAD SO SOFTLY 🥺🥺🥺

when u finally went into labor, u were like wow this hurts a F U CK TOO NNN

u woke up to the bedsheets soaked underneath u, pins n needles were all u could feel

u kinda sat there for ten minutes, scaring urself n making urself nervous when u started doubting yourself and feeling the pain become stronger

ur hands were s hh aa kkyy

u would tap chan so softly and feel a little frustrated he didnt wake up but like how tf was he supposed to feel that 😳

u kinda started crying now because u were STRESSED and him not waking up (no shit ur little tap wasnt gonna work but) it felt like he was gonna sleep forever

so ur hands pressed on chan’s shoulders, shaking them a little bit and letting out a,

“chris?” which ur voice was quiet as hell, shaky as hell, and wavering as you whispered to him

him opening his eyes to see your teary ones n hes just so sad that his heart drops 🥺

he never wakes up quicker though and hes sitting up fast as fuck

“what? what’s wrong?”

ur literally sobbing and hes freaked out by this because u have never cried like this

he kinda just wants to go back to bed since ur just crying but he knows smth is probably wrong because ur SOBBING so

“my water broke.”

now its his turn to be nervous cause fuck he is feeling so unprepared

he said fuck shoes on u, slipping u into his own clothes and helping u into the car so u two could go

did i forget to mention the hospital was an hour away 😳

he wants to pull over hearing u whine n grip his hand, noticing ur quietness and ur little mumbles everytime u rest ur head back after a contraction

he doesn’t give a fuck, he will carry u into the hospital and then put u in a wheelchair from the entrance so u don’t have to walk

u have a feeling maybe hes more nervous than u but atm ur fuckin close to losing it over the pain

u two are settled into a room, epidural done and just trying to make u comfortable now

u were seven centimeters which u still had to wait but u both knew u were close to meeting ur baby

when u are at ten centimeters though, chan is just a ball of tears and he’s just so proud of you

your hand was in his the whole time, chan’s lips near ur ear and he’s just whispering for u to concentrate on him and how much u wanna meet the baby

“i—i can’t do it!” 🥺🥺

you were honestly so drained and ur forehead was laced with sweat, ur hands sweaty and shaking in his own from being nervous and slowly becoming weaker as u put ur strength into pushing

“baby, you are probably what? three pushes, maybe you can cut it to one and a half. alright? you can do this baby, we’re so close to meeting our baby.”

that’s all u needed n chan knew it

surprise surprise,, chan was right about one and a half

“it’s a boy!!” which chan would press his lips to yours so quickly, u two crying and letting out watery laughs as your baby boy cried 🥺

he hasn’t felt this much pride and love since debut or releasing an album or tour, he couldn’t express how gifted he was to have deserved the gift of being a father

ofc they introduce you both to kangaroo care, chan so ready to take off his shirt and feel his baby boy’s skin against his own warm skin and he did so

then it was ur turn to hold him the same way, chan asking u if he could pull down ur gown so u could hold him like he did

that was the picture he needed, snapping it and getting you holding the baby against your naked (ofc ur gown was covering ur breasts) chest, your son sleeping soundly with his hands pressed against you

u two were parents now, u both had learned about pregnancy together and now u two were going to explore parenthood together

©️ maysdiors 2020 :: all rights reserved. do not repost my work on tumblr or other platforms.

[custer-mp3]

long-ass general life update for you nosy bitches // tw: men, my bad legs

so boring to say i’m settling in but i am, i just wish there was something better to call it

there was somebody camped out in the back of the park across from our house down by the railroad tracks, on what we think is technically railroad property, and the parks department came today and tried to haul their shit away without a police order cuz “it’s just trash” no dude it’s a tent that’s someone’s home you leave it the fuck alone so Agatha screamed at them until they went away but then the cops came by & tagged it so now they have 3 days to move or the parks department’s allowed to come back & take their shit away

when we were trying to figure out whose site it so so we could reach out to them thru the drop-in center we noticed the tent was locked but had been cut open and the rain fly was ripped off and Agatha says it’s probably fine but it looked like somebody rolled their shit hella bad & i’m just worried about whoever it is, it looked like multiple people (or at least a guy and a girl) and i hope they’re okay like. physically

thanksgiving weekend launched me into the flare of the century i’m still not recovered from. i dared unpack my boxes of books yesterday (which were all small!! 6 free USPS boxes!!) and my knees had just. Had It. from that 20 minutes of activity. my wrists and elbows are flaring rly bad rn too & i had to buy ankle braces cuz my Achilles was already super fucked up from moving & like. whole body hurts.

i was limping around super bad at work--like unable to actually walk, just kinda toddling around in slow-mo if they needed me to move somewhere--and my manager made fun of me to my face IMITATING MY LIMP ON BLACK FRIDAY when i requested a break then my ASM and tenured keyholder ALSO made fun of me on Hell Saturday and i’m going to burn the entire store down

marina says report them to HR but that’s not very anarchist of me and i just don’t care enough to ruin their lives cuz it’s a temp job anyway and i can make it thru the holiday surely but it’s also like. i am the most able-bodied disabled person i know. i get more shit done in a day with 2 nonfunctional legs and fucked up arms and guts that are trying to escape my body and The Brain Fog TM than most people in full health do. if you’re being this awful to ME to my fkn FACE, ON THE CLOCK, how awful are you to “““actually disabled”““ ppl like out in the world on your free time

i just hate that there are no buses on sundays, no buses after 7, and i keep getting put on these dumb fucking late closes that mean either paying $15 for an Uber or walking the 3 miles home in the dark and the cold and some days i just physically Cannot with my Body and have to pay for the Uber which sucks ass cuz i’m making barely above federal minimum wage again

but i’ve been walking dogs and stuff with Kara. she’s got a hot friend who saw the picture of my halloween costume she threw in the groupchat and apparently thinks i’m cute and has been inquiring about my existence ever since so she asked me if she could give him my number and like sure bro i’ve met this dude exactly once AND I DIDN’T HAVE EYEBROWS ON AND WAS STANDING THERE RUBBING MY EYEBROW STUBBLE IN MY OVERSIZED SLIPKNOT HOODIE AND PAJAMA PANTS but i would like him to throw me thru a brick wall so sure but then he tEXTED ME and we set up a hangout which was supposed to just be coffee but turned into a whole-ass actual lunch date which like. worm. and made out in my living room cuz why not.

yesterday we hung out again (the coffee i was promised) and walked dogs with Kara in the cemetery and went to Kinko’s and the sketchy Halloween store that’s still open in fkn December and also made out, and then he was like “we should have an Actual Date For Real People” and i was like mfkr what?!?????? is that not???? no??????????????

so that occurred t o d a y cuz you can’t call me anything but efficient and spoiler alert, it was NOT a Real People Date, it was a fkn punk shitbag date, we definitely smashed then cuddled and tried to get Parsnip to interact with the other cat in a peaceful fashion and listened to Ministry and helped Agatha with the camp/park service situation and dealt with the cops when they showed up and had the aUDAciTY to park in front of our house to pull that shit then ran errands and cuddled and went to a Food Not Bombs meeting like. mfkr. that aint a date. that’s hanging out. how. is the prior 2 things with designated start times and wearing Nice Shirts and Going In Public Together Solo and shit not dates but tODaY was a date. fkn. WHAT

anyway he’s simple and sweet and hilarious and pro-SW anarcho communist and insanely hot and self-deprecating and i want to climb him like a tree but he too is divorced once over and we’ve Talked about it & it’s made me feel Better about my own shit & like. i want him to throw me through a brick wall and buy me food and leave me alone, and he’s in a non-monogamous relationship with one of Kara’s friends and his partner’s like “bro u need to date other ppl so i don’t feel bad” and y’know, that’s fuckin stellar imo. for me.

like what this whole fkn Ordeal has made me realize is i actually hate being in capital-R-Relationships. i do NOT want the pressure of being somebody’s whole world, i do not want the EXPECTATION of being solely responsible for somebody’s emotional happiness and well-being, i just wanna be friends with people and hang out and make art and occasionally make out and otherwise be left alone to do my own thing so this is like. rad as fuck. that this just sorta fell into my lap fully-formed and i didn’t have to do a bunch of screening and dealing with fuckboys and everything i was dreading abt y’know. finding someone to make out with in the midwest

and it was all because of my dumbass pun-based nu-metal halloween costume, which is the best thing that’s happened to me in decades, so. thank u jonathan davis

but i’m making friends--mostly thru Kara, but the other fellow new KH at work is the oldest person in the store (older than me by a couple years) and ALSO super into all things manson-adjacent and ALSO super queer and everything and has given me a ride home a couple times and i love her so maybe we’ll end up being friends in the long run too--and like living with Kara’s been good cuz there are always people around and she doesn’t mind me inviting myself on stuff sometimes so

there’s some sort of Krampus parade thing this Saturday in which for $2 you can actually be beaten with sticks and the squad’s going to that and we’re all doing FNB on Sunday and i know aforementioned dude is gonna be there but also so is his partner so like. that’ll be Inch Resting. but. we’ll survive. ‘we’  meaning me.

idk if it’s some sort of fucked up coping mechanism from coming dead last in my own monogamous relationships for uhhhhhhhhhhhh my entire fucking life but y’know. i kinda just feel whatever abt it!! like cool!! there is the dude i am fast friends with and def have a mutual crush on and am also currently fucking! and there’s the person he’s been dating for 3.5 years and owns a house with, and they’re a Thing!! and idk where i fit and what the vibe’ll be idk if the partner’s other ppl are gonna be there too so it’ll be weird fr all of us or it’s just me and like honestly how do y’all NAVIGATE i just don’t wanna make fkn heart eyes at the wrong time or NOT make heart eyes at the wrong time U FEEL ME

but also y’know what, whatever, fine. i’m like the least possessive person in the universe. like. i like that it’s all out in the open and people aren’t running around on me or anybody else. can’t believe this is my life, honestly. idk if the squad was conspiring on this or what cuz kara has terminal Nice Person disease but. good job fam. 

i was in a real dark place this time last week and it only got worse over Hell Weekend, like. feeling directionless / unmotivated / isolated / lonely / traumatized / failure. it’s really been hitting me hard that i’m [redacted] years old & getting d*vorced & back in a punk house in a city i’d never set foot in before & working the shittiest shit job in the history of shit jobs and i’m never gonna see this person that was my best friend for so long again (cuz, y’know, i know i don’t talk abt the Private Life on here very often/in very concrete terms ~~this post being the exception~~ but. we were Best Friends. for a very long time) & i’m officially losing this friendship that meant so much to me and does mean so much to me, because i do care about him as a friend. like. fuck him as a spouse, he’s terrible at that, but as a friend i don’t want to see him struggling. which is bullshit. cuz he was abusing me and my life was a living goddamn hell in VA. but it’s hard to let go of the basis of the whole goddamn Ordeal to start with, and it’s hard to reconcile My Friend Whomst I Adore with My Ex-Husband Who Triggers Me On Purpose & Reads My Instagram Messages & Has Been Blackout Drunk For Months & Won’t Let Me Have Space Even In My Own Office, and it’s hard cuz the only people i know who’ve gone through something like this are dead. and all of that’s hitting at once. and i can put up with a lot of shit but i cannot put up with feeling like a failure within myself. and shit was truly fucking bleak.

so the whole social life thing just came at a good time y’know & even if things otherwise aren’t going the way i want there’s at least one good spot in my life. i got friends, i’m getting out of the house, i figured out where the good cemetery is, people are buying me food & talking me through all of this & rubbing the shaved part of my head & i’m happy

kara’s got a dr’s appt tmrw AM & the dude is apparently our designated Responsible Adult With Car so he’s picking her up from that & will be in my house once again tmrw morning & i fully plan on hiding in my room and pretending to be asleep cuz fuck that lmao don’t make me socialize i was not emotionally prepared for that

hayden sent me a 1995 Marilyn Manson gig poster and an enamel pin of a jackalope wearing a cone of shame & honestly??? i do not deserve him, talk about great friends

we need to get a frame for the poster but then me & kara are starting a MM wall in one of our living rooms & it’s gonna be great. the dude’s gonna come over with a drill & help me hang shelves in my room some time soon so i can finish getting unpacked cuz i’m just down to the boxes of art and getting all my shelf crap squared away & then i can finally finish Unpacking For Good

me & kara cried on the kitchen floor together last night from laughter bc i still have not learned my lesson in How Much Soup A Bowl Can Hold and my lizard brain was convinced if i got the beans under the liquid it would all fit, which, spoiler--it did not, and all my makeup ran off my face. it was that good. i love her so much

anyway thanks for listening check out the distro so i can buy groceries until my food stamp paperwork clears which will probably not be for almost another goddamn month i’m so pissed

xo

[jiyeonstudies]

hello my lovely friends it’s ya girl ji home for the summer!!

i wanted to start this a while back but finals came up and what not, but i’m back & better than ever (´｡• ω •｡`) so every thursday night - sunday night i’ll be doing sleepovers in my ask! if ur interested keep on reading but if not scroll down~

blacklist #jisleepover if u don’t wanna see me talk hehe

thank u all for 10k+ i seriously don’t deserve any of u like thank u so much for everything <3

love, ji

all you gotta do is drop me an ask or even private message if ya feel like being ~*~* intimate *~*~ jk not like that but u knOW LOL

here are some things we can talk about:

your day/your night

your favorite things/hobbies (literally anything)

ask me questions about anything

music/instruments

fangirl with me!! about anything!!

advice? i got u!! relationships? got u!! school? got u!!

your hopes n dreams n ambitions all that guud guud

wanna rant about that one teacher who gives u shit??? i’m all ears boo

“ji tell us a rly funny story about u in highschool”  or “ji what was ur first year of college like”  or “ji why do u fckin suck at typing” lolloloLOL

honestly anything u want to talk about my friends my ask box is open for u!!

if u want me to answer privately make sure to put (private) or something to lmk :)

[witchofdoom]

can i have 14 for auralia, 1 for chi and can i also like drop the bomb completely and do 8 for ama

Them in an uncomfortable outfit

P a n t s. (God what’s up w/ my ocs and hating pants)

It feels weird having fabric just. SURROUNDING her legs and making it so hard to shift vs like a dress or skirt. Pants in general just feel super restricting too?? Since ~under the sea~ clothing isn’t really a thing since it just gets wet so the more fabric the worse it is minus on the arms. But even then she doesn’t like the longer sleeves either? Mostly tight ones just....get off my skin blease.

Them as a child

I LOVE THAT U SENT THIS FOR HER AFTER I GOT IT FOR AMA JUST....THE COMPLETE OPPOSITE END OF THE SAME BAD HOUSE.....

Chi has always been a go getter, even without the guise of her parents she loves the praise and competition. Not as stoic as she is as a teen/adult tho she would be enthusiastic about new things and learning and just planning so many things for the future...

She was definitely a model student and someone a lot of people looked up and went to for help. She was a bit cold to people but more in the sense of just being blunt with her words. Tho maybe that added to her ~Cool and Collected Senpai~ vibe

But of course with the ever so much a piece of shit bad dad her enthusiasm turned more into doing it for the sake of doing it/being a chore? Like she still liked the praise, still liked pushing herself, still liked learning but when only the best of the best was expected of you it just became....annoying. But she would never dare to say that or go against wishes of her parents because they were her family they were her guardians they were the ones who taught her and raised her they were in the right!!! Right? And. TERRIBLE AS IT IS seeing Ama be more compromised with what their dad wants kind of placed a fear in her to not falter...

Weird thing to mention after that but she enjoyed sports a lot too!! She was in track in her middle school years + some stuff on the side for fun and joined her high school’s gal basketball team when she moved. Ofc she left this behind for the sake of LAW but she’s always been athletic as a kiddo.

Their interactions with their significant other(s), if they have them

Holy shit I. THIS IS REVENGE FOR MY ASK H U H. Alright this is gonna be a long one...

Maybe not rly super on topic but? To start off this long train of rambling to say that. Ama sees Meti as a knight in shining armor is an understatement??? Like even saying he’s that AND her prince charming is not even close to how much he means to her like....in the weirdest of wording he’s just her snuggle bunny....like he’s him and she loves him and u ever think abt someone u love so much u cry that’s her 24/7 probably.

EARLY ON in their relationship/knowing each other in general was?? Awkward. You got shouty mcfight guy and I’m crying on the inside anxiety incarnate but it oddly??? Worked out?? Like maybe it was because shared interests??? Maybe it was how opposite their personalities were they ended up balancing each other out??? Or just how strange their first meeting was??? Maybe how (even if the methods weren’t. SOMETHING SHE CONDONED) she kinda admired people who didn’t take shit or confident??? or even something more!! (Or. something that needs to be specified/worked on more since it was like 6 years ago and stuff changed om g) But it was basically just these two, honestly very broken people coming together to create something new and fix all the cracks in each other along the way, despite neither of them really knowing that they were there to begin with? Or how deep the damages were.

LIKE AS MENTIONED BEFORE Ama was. Not a very social person?? And failed with the interactions that came with it pretty often like hell their first meeting she was probably quiet for 75% of it....And hell even as friends she was super quiet but like she cares for ppl so much it still kinda showed just from her expressions and actions and the few words she DID say. Quiet mom friend. She liked being around him a lot??? Like ofc she enjoyed the company of the rest of the friend group but just....even the simplest of things they did together?? The stupidest of conversations (or i/g early on more like him rambling since...tfw super quiet and also the added fear of not knowing a language 100% and accent) and just him (u kno when he wasn’t. KINDA PUTTING HIMSELF IN DANGER) made her heart go doki doki....Despite her denying and denying like no wtf ur horrible u don’t DESERVE to have friends or even a crush :/// thinking that like he’s gonna like u back smfh :////

After knowing him (+ friends) for a bit she did become a little bit more open?? Like in the friend way tho like she still hid her issues like hell. It was like before where she was empathetic to everyone and stuff just a little more friendly...still like ummmm EVEN IF THEY LIKE U NOBODY (meti) WOULD EVER LOVE U. She did kinda hold back bc of that just umm u wanna lose a FRIEND too u fuck???? (This. Stupid summer child.....u fool....) Once they got together tho she was actually kinda?? The same as before but instead of ummm it was more like AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA///

I think this came?? A little bit after getting together but weird thing w/ Ama is that the closer u are to her the more she’ll actually speak up about things? Like her concern for you grows and she’ll put more of her own issues to stop u from doing fuck shit. So like she was still super caring and sweet but then the Mom Friend Attitude(tm) got mixed in a bit with that since. GESTURES TO METI, WHO FOUGHT PEOPLE JUST BECAUSE. And that probably kinda. opened pantrauma’s box of hell after a while of ‘ur gonna get hurt stop!!!’ just.....‘SOME PEOPLE??? FIGHT PEOPLE TO COPE???’ ‘wait what are u coping for-’ like that kinda showed that?? They trust each other enough to actually talk about this stuff despite not really realizing that?? Like...maybe not the root of the issues but maybe the mentality that lead to it and the start of healing for him?? Like she’s always been empathetic but it was something really new to just....see someone she cared about so much be like this and just wanting to help him....THO SHE HERSELF WAS STILL KINDA CLOSED OFF ABOUT HER OWN ISSUES AND TRIED TO HIDE THEM SINCE SHE DIDN'T WANT HIM TO WORRY AMA WHY...LIKE THIS IS STILL A THING EVEN IF WAY LESS...that sweet sweet abuse trauma I guess. She gets better with later years tho like with her feelings and even trauma at least but u h sweats at the medical issues that’s another story //horrayplz

Tries to....stay more vague tho bc this is getting long but like for the majority/still now she’s always been kinda dotting?? Like maybe not in a mom way now bc that’s weird but like in a spouse kinda way where she just wants him to be happy and safe and she def has gotten way better with speaking and is way more open about her concerns/feelings for him?? Like again with the balancing thing sorta she’s there to hold things back to make sure they don’t explode vs him who protects and maybe has things blow up just a little bit so it’s not brushed under the rug when something upsets her and will cause issues since she’s still super passive to things...But like her concerns come from nothing but a good place and just absolute pure love for him?

Also in terms of like affections she does like. Hold back a bit despite REALLY LOVING IT?? Like tbh it’s kinda rare for her to initiate stuff besides like hugs/hand holding/leaning against him and sometimes cuddling?? Morning/Goodbye/Goodnight kisses are smthing she’s more okay with doing too since it’s just quick and sweet and u don’t usually give a second thought to those....Even then she’s still so easily embarrassed like Ama blease you’ve been together for 6 years and in main verse ur married!!! Also god just in general she just....likes being near him or sitting next to him or laying against him and all that good stuff like her cheeks still kinda go redder than usual (bc fun fact!!! Ama’s cheeks are actually naturally rosy.) but it helps her relax and she feels so safe...HENCE THE WHOLE KNIGHT THING AT THE BEGINNING....

tl;dr bc god knows ppl need it: Ama just....loves Meti a lot. She cares about him so much and it’s a case of these two broken and lost people finding each other in such a cruel world and coming together to help fix each other while making something new along the way. She feels safe with him, she feels at home with him, she feels happy with him. He’s not her knight in shining armor, he’s not her prince charming, he’s not even her soul mate....he’s so much more than that he’s her snuggle bunny.

[resilientreader]

1-98 for asks like we did a million years ago, I dare you

i knew the MOMENT i saw the notif in my inbox that it was gonna be YOU pulling this shit and i crossed my fingers when actually clicking, HOPING i wouldnt have to answer all 98, maybe you’ll be tame this time, but no! this is what you’re doing to me. and ykno what, Fine. u dare me and i Will do it. i hope u rb the asks post so i can do it to u too, tho

1. coffee mugs

2. chocolate bars

3. bubblegum

4. that smart student who always read instead of actually paying attention

5. soda from glass cups is the best

6. its hard to just Decide between all these styles so ill say which one applies to mine most, which i Gotta say has to b preppy even if i want like goth or grunge to b mixed in

7. headphones

8. good omens, fmab, castlevania, uhhhh. those are just the ones ive watched so far this summer

9. my grandparents’ home. which is kinda weird but i have a lot of summer memories there

10. i sucked at like Everything in p.e., there Was no best

11. leftovers

12. i cant choose a favorite playlist?? /some/ of them, tho, are soar my ethereal heart, neither here nor there, mountainside storms, and sync of my heartbeat. so like any of my more recent ones

13. lanyard

14. i had to google a list for this bc honestly i always eat just chocolates but i like starburst

15. fahrenheit 451 was a rly fun read. ray bradbury’s writing gave me inspo for metaphors and writing and such and it was rly nice

16. sprawled across one of those comfy armchairs where i can swing my legs over one arm n lay my head on the other one

17. my black converse

18. cool temperature and rain without storms, or a cloudy day that lets me take a nice walk

19. on my side if i can but on my back otherwise

20. on my laptop, in google docs, to be more specific

21. winnie the pooh

22. idk?? i try not to look to just one person for a source of “this is how i should be”, so i guess,,,, a mix of family members and then a couple like more famous ppl??? which would basically consist of one of my aunts, my dad, and jenna marbles, to keep my Brain Process for role model stuff simplified

23. i dunno if any of the habits i have are strange?? i bounce my right leg and my right hand kinda. like. shakes when im nervous. i cant rly think of anything else i do tho i Know i probably have other habits

24. amethyst or pyrite

25. ur really just assuming my memory is good enough for this but if i had to say, it’d be any popular song from 2009 specifically

26. hide in my room with a fan and ac

27. read with a blanket wrapped around me or smth

28. atlas: six by sleeping at last, flaws by bastille, atlas: five by sleeping at last, she by dodie, and neptune by sleeping at last. there are probably more/better ones but those are the first ones i found

29. listen. be open with me. talk with me. not to sound like that person, but sharing ur life secrets is a rly big ice breaker for me because it helps let me know i can trust u. but also idk im a really awkward person and can accidentally distance myself from ppl so when ppl notice theres smth up w me or even do the bare minimum of doing Their part to maintain a friendship, that’s always rad as shit when idk how to communicate what i need

30. my room, my high school’s auditorium, the local barnes and noble

31. black boots, black jeans, any button-up shirt that’ll match that combination OR a really cool sweatshirt

32. im a bad bitch, you cant kill me. road work ahead? uh, i sure hope it does. it is wednesday, my dudes! welcome to chili’s. i love you, bitch, and i ain’t ever gonna stop loving you, bitch.

33. probably “omg” or “oh my god”

34. sc johnson. a family company.

35. i dont even have one but on a good night like 10-11

36. the troll face memes

37. suitcases feel much more organized

38. lemonade

39. lemon cake

40. ummmmm....one time a tech/theatre kid left a paint can sitting out in the open accidentally and a person took a shit in it or smth then knocked over the can, spilled a bunch of paint, and tried to clean it up w a broom and proceeded to like snap the broom in half. then they ran away to leave the kids to clean it up the next day. i wasnt actually there for that but ive heard the story firsthand enough times to Know

41. my dad

42. jacket pockets

43. hoodie is what i wear, tho everything else is Very Good

44. lavender

45. fantasy, my dudes

46. this set of pjs i got for xmas w a soft tshirt and matching baggy flannel pants

47. colby jack

48. uhhh a banana?? i could probably give a better answer if i was more

49. i dont rly live by a quote or saying, i just Go for it

50. my sister has probably done smth before to like Break me

51. everything ever but mostly myself

52. arial

53. uhhh...kinda worn? my nails aren’t doin so good and i have a couple scratches and stuff that Still havent healed after a few weeks

54. get a move on

55. the ugly duckling

56. tradition is kinda vague but i like that it became tradition for me and my siblings to go to my grandparents’ home every summer

57. i think im still overcoming like everything ive been faced with ever

58. writing? listening, helping, giving advice. idk tbh like talents who?

59. "jesus christ, my dude”

60. a fantasy/comedy, or at least if its gonna be fantasy with death and stuff, it should be dope as fuck

61. "isn’t vulnerability the opposite of being in control?” from a webcomic called aerial magic. super simple but the entire scene leading up to it,,,,,so good

62. umm fuck! i dont kno whether favs r usually ones that i relate to or ones that i wanna b like but??? keith from voltron, jirou from bnha, chromedome and/or rewind from transformers/mtmte, sypha from castlevania, and jayfeather from warriors

63. planetary (go!) by mcr, the seed by aurora, hayloft by mother mother, the cup/halloween blues from relient k, choke by i dont know how but they found me

64. coolmath was THE shit

65. yes! two on my leg from a surgery i had to get to realign my femur, bc i snapped the bone in half

66. lavender, snowdrops, hibiscus

67. i dont really have any, mostly bc i have a hard time attaching like. That sorta meaning to just random objects, but i do still have a small teddy bear stashed safely away in my room from when i was a little babee

68. pickle-flavored pringles. disgusting. would not recommend

69. lions’ roars can be heard up to 5 miles away from the original source

70. right handed

71. horizontal stripes, i guess? there’s not much wrong with them but i just Never wear them

72. math

73. i dont usually eat /weird/ flavor combos, even tho ill eat basically anything, but i like ketchup in mac and cheese sometimes. or fries in shakes. chicken and waffles. stuff like that

74. 11

75. idek honestly, my memory is too bad

76. hashbrowns

77. i dont kno a Lot of plants off the top of my head other than the Basic ones but literally any flower in a windowsill is like bone apple teeth in my mind

78. sushi from a grocery store. publix taught me that grocery stores can, in fact, be trusted when needed

79. my school id photo

80. earth tones

81. fireflies

82. pc

83. writing

84. talk radio is nostalgic but podcasts are always more entertaining to actually listen to

84. polly pocket

85. mythology with a dash of fairytales

86. cupcakes, because of my dog’s name

87. abandonment

88. to grow unbreakable attachments with everyone i care very deeply about and grow into an old age with them, or something

89. i feel like answering this question totally honestly would hurt ppl’s feelings, but also i literally could think of like 4 people to put down for this and i’m bad at deciding, esp w smth like this, so. not to b vague but These People kno who they are

90. becoming a part of a certain website with a bad crowd and managing to pick out the good apples in such a rotten batch

91. boxes

92. lamps /and/ fairy lights

93. i dont rly have any but my parents call me hannah banana. that’s ab it, tho

94. fall/winter? it kinda is inconsistent because fall has bad weather in florida but winter is when like everything has Gone Wrong in life these past few years, but then fall has such a GOOD aesthetic and my birthday is in winter, so they’re pretty even rn

95. uhhh??? thats such a weird thing, to try and assign a “favorite” app, but the only thing i could think to say would be spotify just bc i use it so much on my phone, even if the app itself isnt the greatest

96. i havent set one, actually, bc im lazy and havent found anything that’d fit

97. 2 and a half

98. the part where fish were learning that they could walk on land