#i still steal my dads shirts lol

[veggiesforpresident]

i think a useful example of like, “both things can be true at once” is like... im a cis woman and ive always been drawn to wearing mens clothes, i would borrow my dads ties and shirts when i was a teenager, but i never actually considered buying something for myself until college, when i heard another cis woman talk about shopping in the men’s section for just like, tshirts and boxers and shit. that was my “oh shit you can do that?” moment.

meanwhile, a trans friend of mine cites wearing their dads shirts and wanting to be like their dad for some ~~inexplicable reason~~ when they were a kid as like, a real Egg Moment that they realized looking back on.

idk where im going with this exactly. overlap in experiences is neat and its interesting how we all come to different conclusions about it.

[nejiverse]

YOU’RE HIRED!

Nagi Seishiro

In which you ‘interview’ your jobless boyfriend

cw: suggestive at the end, choki is the name of nagi’s pet cactus for those who don’t know, I’ll proofread this later lol

802 words

"Sei you really need to get a job", you plopped down next to him on the bed as he looked extremely focused on what ever game he was playing.

"Ehh? Sounds like a pain".

"Breathing is a pain for you love, at this point you're just gonna have to build a bridge and get over it", you spoke resting your head on his shoulder.

He frowned. "Building a bridge sounds like a pain too".

"...i meant that metaphorically, I don't actually expect you to build one", you didn't think you'd ever have to explain that...but here you were.

"Still a pain".

You were on the verge of banning that word from his vocabulary.

You let the room fall silent for a second before you quickly snatched his console away from him and crawled to the end of the bed.

Which unfortunately was unsuccessful because Nagi grabbed you by your leg.

"Stealing isn't nice y'know", he pouted while he put his hand out, expecting you to drop his console back into his hand.

"Oh like that time you stole my last chicken nugget?".

"Borrowed actually", he huffed.

You shook your head and stuffed his console down your shirt, showing your empty hands to him as if you've just done the most incredible magic trick.

"You need a life babe", it was true. All he did was wake up, play games, and go back to sleep. It was unhealthy.

"You are my life", he responded.

You laughed. "Nice try but that won't get your console back".

"Aw, damn".

You thought of an idea that'd entertain you but also would let you figure out if your boyfriend was equipped for a job...or if anyone would even consider employing him.

"Alright pretend i'm your potential employer, if you pass my interview you can have it back", you sat up and crossed your legs.

Nagi agreed, but only if you'd make it easy.

"So tell me a bit about yourself", you decided to skip introductions. There was no way anyone could flunk that, even your lazy boyfriend.

"Mmm my name is Nagi Seishiro, I like games and sleep", he blinked at you as you urged him to go on but he only shrugged his shoulders. "That's it".

You face palmed at his hopelessness. "Sei is that seriously what you're gonna tell your employer?!".

"Of course it is".

The fact that he was serious added to your worry for him but the show must go on.

"Why did you decide to apply for this job?".

Nagi placed a hand on his chin in thought. He already had his answer but it just added to the theatrics of it all in his opinion.

"I was forced to apply against my will by my girlfriend", he spoke.

"Seiii! Your employer will literally leave!", you shook his shoulders gently.

"I say good riddance".

"Okay one more question, and answer it properly!", you forewarned. He thought his answers were pretty proper though.

"Why should we hire you?".

"So my girlfriend'll stop bugging me about getting a job...do I get the job now?".

"Fuck no", you laughed, scooting closer to your disappointed boyfriend who laid back down with a sigh.

"If it makes you feel any better, A for effort", you laid your head on his chest. "You can just work from home or something".

"I can be a house husband", you looked up at him quizzically.

"Sei, sweetie, love of my life, you don't even do the small chores you have these days...I don't think that's possible", you patted his chest.

He grumbled under his breath, you really had zero faith in him but you were only being realistic.

"Alright then I can be a stay at home dad”.

You raised a brow. Nagi of all people as a father??. "For that you'd need actual kids. We've none of those".

You were taken aback when Nagi moved your head from his chest to the pillow and got on too of you, a hand at your head and the other on your waist. You blinked blankly. "Let's get to baby makin' then", he said it so casually, you were shocked…but not completely opposed to the idea.

“S-seriously?”, you averted your gaze to the side.

Nagi’s hand slithered up your top as he shook his head.

“Nah, I just realised I’d still have to do chores”, he took back his console and laid next to you, continuing his game. “Besides we’ve got a kid already”.

“We do?”.

“Yeah, Choki”.

Masterlist :)

a/n: more drafts..I’ve a biology exam in two days and I just came back from holidays 💀

[just-another-author-i-guess]

Ngl after seeing the hookup house episode and reading this I have to see more jessi and Y/N interaction about what happened and more jessi reaction to her sister dating her very older crush like 😭😂

I love writing Y/n and Jessi interactions so much 😭✋ here’s just a little something of them talking about what happened with Judd’s shirt lol

Tags: fem! Reader, actually no smut this time wow 🤩, sibling rivalry, sorta, ig?, their argument is kinda unresolved, swear words, kaitlyn is nice, she gives sorta good advice, I’m a kaitlyn stan idc, this is really short there’s not really that much to say about it

Summary: you confront Jessi about the shirt incident.

There’s kinda a part 1 (one) to this one, it’s not totally necessary, but you can read it HERE

Author’s note: once again I struggled with dialogue,,, idk how you talk to your younger sister lol i have a brother 🧍🏻they’re not like Judd and Nick tho, they actually like each other lmfao

A heart to heart about Jessi’s sister’s boyfriend

Word count; 1,7K

“Hey sweet-pea, Jessi-bear, I hope you two are hungry because—“

Jessi stormed right past your dad, barely granting him a glance as she darted straight down the hallway and into her room. The two of you stood in silence and listened as she slammed her door.

Your mouth tightened into a long, thin line and you closed the front door behind you— settling your overnight and Jessi’s backpack you had been carrying down on the floor.

Your dad raised his eyebrows. “What.. uh, what’s that about?”

Kissing your teeth, you answered; “I don’t even know anymore, dad. I think she’s mad at me for having a boyfriend,” — and also extremely embarrassed because you caught her stealing one of Judd’s shirts. But you kept that to yourself.

He blinked, you watched him reach a conclusion. “That sucks, sweetheart.” He measly answered— your eyebrows drew together and you clenched your teeth. You did love your dad, but he was distinctly awful at saying the right thing.

‘That sucks? THAT SUCKS? Damn right, it sucks, Greg! It sucks worse than your fucking job at Whole Foods,’ Connie’s hair puffed up angrily, she held both your shoulders in her hand and glared at your dad from behind you. ‘Give him hell, honey-bun,’ She urged you.

You opened your mouth to retort, a snappy comment ready on your tongue when Kaitlyn beat you to it. “What Greg meant to say—” She started, fixing your dad a pointed look. “—Is that’s awful, it sucks that you have to deal with that,”

She sent you a small smile, and you knew that was definitely not what your dad meant to say, but you appreciated the sentiment. You smiled back stiffly, leaning on the counter where she was cutting vegetables.

“Thanks, Kaitlyn.” You muttered. Connie bristled. ‘Who the hell do you think you are, cheesegirl? We didn’t ask you,’ She scoffed, hissing at Kaitlyn— again, you shared her attitude. You were annoyed yourself, quite on edge after the long walk home with an angry Jessi and now dealing with your dad and Kaitlyn.

She stopped cutting vegetables. “Hey,” she said, gaining your attention again. You stared at her, apathetically. “I used to have a crush on my older sister's boyfriend. She’ll get over it, and if you feel like it you could talk to her about it— 12-year-old girls can be crazy, it’s pretty cool you’re still so nice to her,”

Connie blew her nose in her hair. ‘Cheesgirl is actually right? Oh god, we should have listened to her more, she knows just what to say,’ The monster sniffled, dramatically clasping a hand over her heart.

You smiled, genuinely this time. “Wait, Jessi has a crush on Judd?” Your dad looked at you, bewildered. The soft expression fell from your face and became tired as you looked at him.

“Obviously.” To your surprise, both you and Kaitlyn echoed each other.

“Huh. I thought she was scared of him,” Your dad’s eyes narrowed and a thoughtful expression crossed his face— he forgot to turn the pot he had on the stove as he recalled the only interaction he had witnessed between Jessi and Judd. The one and only time you had brought him over for dinner.

Kaitlyn rolled her eyes and sent you a look that clearly showed her overbearing of your father, you couldn’t help but softly laugh in return.

“Okay. I’ll go talk to her,” you stated, determined.

Kaitlyn cheered you on as you walked down the hall to Jessi’s room, and for the first time you truly appreciated your dads new girlfriend.

-

Chewing on the inside of your cheek, you delivered three sharp knocks to Jessi’s door. She didn’t answer.

“Hey, Jessi, can I come in?” You got your answer in the form of a muffled sound from the other side.

You opened the door slowly, peaking inside to see Jessi curled up on her bed— on her stomach with her face pressed into the pillows.

Her back was shaking lightly, and that’s when you realised the muffled sound was her crying. “Aw, Jessi-bear,” you cooed, stepping fully into the room and closing the door.

Sitting down on the bed, you gently reached out and touched your sisters back— she stiffened, clearly trying to hold back her sniffles.

“Go away.” She mumbled, barely audible as the pillows swallowed most of her sounds.

You sighed deeply, exhaling through your nose. Ideally, you didn’t want to deal with Jessi and her outbreak of jealousy— but, unfortunately, you cared enough about your sister to push your own annoyance aside.

“Jessi, you can’t be mad at me. That’s not fair,” you tried, removing your hand from her.

She suddenly sat up, whipping around to scowl at you. “Are you trying to act like the victim? You embarrassed the shit out of me, in front of Judd!”

You bristled, mouth turning downwards in a frown— it took your utmost patience to not counter Jessi with an insult. Connie shifted her weight nervously from foot to foot, cowering behind Jessi’s bedpost to hide from the incoming argument.

“Listen, I have to be real with you— and it’s gonna sound harsh as shit, but Judd is not going to date you. Ever. He’s 18 and you’re literally 12, even if we break up, it’s not gonna happen.” You deadpanned.

You watched Jessi’s eyes refill with tears, she quickly, angrily dried them off with her sleeve. “I don’t care! I don’t even wanna date your boyfriend, oh my god,” She screeched.

You fixed her a look. “If you didn’t wanna date him, why are you mad at me?” It was a statement more than a question.

Jessi looked away from you. “Because you don’t even care about anything other than Judd, you’re so selfish,” she scoffed.

“Ouch.” You muttered. “I’m so selfish I took the time to walk you home and talk to you because I thought you were upset,”

Your sister seethed. “You are! You’re such a slut too—“

“— Okay, Jessi, don’t fucking slut-shame me. I get that you’re jealous, or whatever but you’re acting like a little prick. I’m trying so hard to be patient with you. What more do you want?” You were a bit desperate now— and exceedingly pissed off.

“I want you to stop embarrassing me! And I want— I want you to actually act like my sister!” She cried, fists angrily colliding with the mattress. You stood up, sneering at your sister.

“This is me acting like your sister! I’m gonna sister the fuck out of you until you die, and it will get so much worse!” You ran a hand through your hair, viciously tugging at the strands. “You think I don’t care about you? I’m talking to you because I care, I’m trying to help you, Jessi,”

Pacing back and forth across Jessi’s bedroom floor, her eyes followed you, vexed. “If you want to help, leave me alone! All you do is humiliate me.” She had seemed to calm down a little— voice lower but way more resentful.

You clicked your tongue, stopping your pacing to glare down at her. “You’re doing a great job of that yourself, idiot.”

“If—if you hadn’t been there—“

“— what? If I hadn’t been there you’d have talked to my boyfriend and shown him the shirt— which is fucking creepy for you to have, by the way— and he’d automatically fall in love with you?”

Jessi looked away, an angry flush woven into her skin. “No. I don’t know.” She muttered.

“Yeah, no.” You hissed. “I love you and all, but you’re a fucking pain. I guess I can’t help you, unless you actually want my help— so I’ll leave you be, but it’s seriously a bummer that you have to act like this.”

You turned to the door, shoulders tense and body rigid with anger, but to your disbelief Jessi called out to you; “Y/n, wait— don’t leave,”

Your brows rose. “What. Change your mind now?” You snapped.

“Yeah, I guess. Don’t leave.” She repeated, and you turned back to her with a defeated look.

Sighing, you replied; “Alright, Jessi. If that’s what you want,”

She scooted away a little, making more space for you on the bed— you picked up on the indication and sat down. She tucked her legs to her chest, resting her head on her knees and looking at you a bit abashed.

“I’m sorry I called you a slut— you aren’t. And it wasn’t very feminist of me,” Jessi muttered.

An airy chuckle escaped you. “Right. I’m sorry too. If you feel like I’ve been spending too much time with Judd, I probably have. I didn’t mean to neglect you, Jessi-bear.”

She wrinkled her nose. “Don’t call me that in front of Judd, ever again. Please.” She grumbled.

“Alright.” You chuckled, eyes caught on a particular spot on the wall— making it appear as if you were staring off into space. “I won’t if you stop stealing his shirts, klepto.” You teased, good naturedly.

Suddenly she untangled herself from her position and sat up on her knees to face you directly. “Oh my god. Please, please, don’t tell anyone about that! Y/n, please!”

You turned to watch her beg. “Wash my dishes for a month and we have a deal.”

She frowned. “Okay. But you really can’t tell anyone, okay? And tell Judd not to tell anyone either,”

“You think Judd would listen to me?” You asked, shrugging.

Jessi’s body sacked slightly. “Just try, pleaseeee, Y/n.”

You reached out an arm, caging her in and pulling her into you. She fell from her position on her knees, tumbling into your side where you squeezed her slightly.

“Only because I love you so much, you little shit.” You grumbled, landing a hand on her head and purposefully rubbing it in to mess up her hair.

She protested, pushing you away and complaining loudly as she fixed her hair. Connie came out from her hiding spot, engulfing the two of you in her hair and hugging you close. Jessi leaned her head on your shoulder.

“I’m actually kinda glad you’re my sister, Y/n,” she answered quietly.

You rolled your eyes at her inability to be sincere. “I know, Jessi-bear.”

Please feel free to request more Judd stuff! I love all the headcannons and ideas y’all send me <3

Tags: @dlfvrr , @bxbyyyjocelyn (not me realizing I forgot to tag and adding it 2 days later)

[wannaeatramyeon]

Omg can u js imagine lookism characters fighting you and they end up getting their ass beat by u? Basically js encountering someone that has 10x their own strength and their reactions would be so funny😭😭😭

Have I imagined being the peak of every fandom I have participated in? Yes. Yes I have.

Meeting Lookism Peak... YOU

You are onepunchman-ing through the Lookismverse.

J High Trio

You definitely weren't siding with Logan Lee and Vin Jin (wtf) but this Daniel Park, Vasco and Zack were causing a lot of trouble and you just wanted everyone to stfu so you can get decent grades.

It got even worse when Logan and Vin flanked you and held your hand. What is this throupling? GET OFF ME.

Vasco muttered about you being a bad guy and threw the first punch. Sigh - stupid birds of a stupid feather stupidly flocking together and before long Zack and Daniel joined in.

The strongest guys in J High? Now lying in a heap in a corner. You? Not even a scratch.

You approached them with tears in your eyes: "please, I'm just trying to learn"

Johan

You've acquired 3 new pups: Eden, Miro and Johan

This motherfucker tried to steal your shoes. Who tf does that. You were just minding your own business and walking home so of course you beat his ass.

And since that day, Johan likes to follow you around in the hopes of copying some of your moves. Shame you're able to KO him so quickly he can't copy anything. He learnt his lesson after the 27th time and doesn't try to steal your shoes anymore. He still follows you in case someone else fights you and he gets to copy.

Big Deal

You're the son of Gapryong Kim? Who's that? I'm just minding my own business and got accused of stealing from this street. No I didn't! I didn't even go into that store. THIS IS MY SHIRT.

This random guy is trying to take your clothes from you..what you gonna do? There's perverts everywhere. You tried to play nice and dodge his attacks but enough is enough. You're sick of people trying to steal your clothes and just knock him unconscious with one hit.

Uhhh where is this actual place and why has he got so much back up? This is Big Deal? What are you guys saying you're a Big Deal or... Oh you're actually called Big Deal?! Lol, losers.

Great. Now you're getting attacked by this ponytail guy. Sinu? and his invisible attacks? What invisible attacks. You can see them all clearly. Stop that. It's annoying. Please just SIT. DOWN.

The person with the biggest beef would be the big bald guy though (seriously who brings their dad to a fight?!) Jerry would go absolutely feral when you knocked out Jake. He's no match but every time he saw you after you can just feel the hate radiating.

Eugene & Workers

Sorry to say but this man is boring af. He seen you beating up his 'Gun and Goo' (this will never not be funny) and tried to recruit you.

You're in school. You're not interested in fighting for no 'Workers'. Besides a 9-5 sounds unbelievably boring right now. Why would you want to work and have responsibility when you can mess around all day. Youth IS wasted on the young, this dumbass.

He'll leave you alone as long as you stay out of his way.

Gun & Goo:

These 2 would just Never. Leave. You. Alone.

They've got eyes and ears everywhere so probably heard about one of your past fights.

First they would try to fight you cos of course they would. But the fact that you're so insanely strong and stronger than them turns them from

To

The fact you are so strong? That you could no diff them? They're just literally like wtf. They have never encountered anyone like you. They didn't even know your strength and fighting skills were possible. You will never know peace again.

Gun is more diplomatic and tries to approach you whenever he can to be his successor and just wanting to know who and what you are. But ultimately he will be itching for a fight each time. You're tired of this guy ripping his clothes off and squaring up to you.

And Goo is a fucking menace. After turning down Goo once to be his secret friend, he's just waiting around every corner with a steel pipe.

Are flies constantly buzzing around not annoying? Looks like you're stuck having to beat these guys up now and then to get them to fuck off and give you some peace but they still always return.

Samuel:

Oh boy. This man and his inferiority complex. He heard Goo mention you just the once ONCE and he got all worried about his Secret Friend status.

He uses his resources to find out about you but you seemed to live a relatively normal and quiet life.

Sammy is still threatened though and goes after you with his brass knuckles. Ok first you had people stealing your shoes and clothes, now you have a third homicidal maniac coming after you. Maybe you should just move.

You feel bad when he starts to have a breakdown after you beat him up. Then that bastard tries to bite your ankles so 🤷🏻‍♀️

DG: I can tell you the secrets to your powers

You: I don't care man, fuck off

DG: jk idk anything lol

[theragethatisdesire]

much ado about nothing chapter 5 - plug!eren x reader - 18+!!!

DISCLAIMER: this post contains MATURE CONTENT that is intended only for those over 18. minors and ageless blogs, please do not read below the cut.

i have successfully kicked my writer's block to the curb and am ready to pick back up on plug!eren!!!! woohoo!! this is the part of the story where it gets really plot heavy and there's a lot of moving parts, so it's been a fun exercise to write and brainstorm. if anything is confusing or u have any theories/questions PLEASE hit my inbox i'm so down bad for plug eren i could talk about him for days.

get ready to meet a new character who is......not the best lol. this is also the first chapter written in eren's pov :o things are about to get interesting!

still haven't caught up? series masterlist HERE <3

specific cws: mentions of smut but nothing outright, alcohol use, swearing, u know the drill

-

“If music be the food of love, play on. / Give me excess of it, that, surfeiting, / The appetite may sicken and so die.” - Twelfth Night by William Shakespeare (Act I, Scene 1)

Eren is, admittedly, a romantic person, especially given his occupation. Not romantic in the cheesy, buying-flowers and kissing-in-the-rain sense, but he appreciates the little details of life. He loves autumn, when the leaves catch on fire with the changing of the season. He loves the little crook of a woman’s neck, that slope where it goes from tendon to shoulder to collarbone. He can appreciate a good bourbon; after years of raiding his dad’s stash, he developed a palate for it early on. Eren’s romantic nature leads him to believe in signs. When the universe tells him something, he listens.

The text still sat in his inbox unopened, marinating in its own bizarre, heartbreaking nature.

> heyyyy lover boy! i’m back from austria! missed u, let’s catch up ;)

Eren knows that Breeze knows him, knows him well enough to understand that his three-week radio silence isn’t a no, it’s a maybe. He hates himself for not immediately texting her back and telling her to fuck off, but after his conversation with you, he thinks it might be the universe telling him it’s safe this time, that he won’t end up a shell of himself. Maybe.

You had been firm in your assertion that you and Eren were better off as friends, and as much as he wanted to fight it, Eren respects women. As much as he can when he’s prone to wrenching their jaws open and spitting in their mouths while he’s balls deep inside them, at least. He’s disappointed, but he respects it, and if he’s honest, he likes you.

He likes your sharp humor, likes the way you tend to keep your hair up off of your neck, likes the way your eyes light up when someone gives you an excuse to talk about your studies. He hasn’t been “just friends” with a woman in a long time, but it’s refreshing, an excuse to go grab a coffee and shoot the shit like a normal person instead of lurking in the corner of a frat party handing out pills like a perverse ice cream truck.

The last three weeks of “friends” have been the best Eren’s had in a long time. You’re easy, that’s what he likes about you. He can drop the cold mask he wears so often, giggle over a stupid meme, listen intently as you prattle on about some long-dead 18th-century author that was “so ahead of her time!”, smirk when you chastise him for doodling little hearts and flowers all over your coursework.

Sure, he still steals a glance down your shirt when he can, and he’d never admit it, but he thinks about you late at night. He thinks about you when he’s in the shower, when he’s got himself in his hand, panting and swearing under his breath, but he manages to feel enough guilt over it to still consider you a friend. You’re caring and considerate and easy, wholesome fun, unlike someone that’s made a sudden reappearance into his life.

After that first night, just when he was starting to entertain the thought of promoting you from one night stand to official fuck buddy, the closest thing to commitment Eren allows himself to maintain these days, Breeze swept back into his life, and you hit the brakes on him. While it may not have been the sign he wanted to receive, Eren’s a romantic, and he listens to the universe, especially when it goes so far out of its way to tell him something.

He’s decided to let Breeze stew for a little while longer. Campus will be clearing out for Thanksgiving break soon, along with most of his business, and he’s going to wait until his hands are empty of work and you before answering her. Plus, she had flitted off to Europe after college like their entire relationship had been nothing more than a passing phase; Eren’s owed at least a little bit of pettiness, right?

> paradise ath 1130! see uthere ;)

Eren snorts at your text. Being as uptight as you are about grammar (you’re constantly hounding him about his texting style, and he’s been making them even more incorrect just to hear you berate him), he knows you’re not just texting quickly, you’re drunk.

“Yo, ‘min!” Eren calls into the kitchen, an excited flutter already rising in his chest beneath his hoodie.

“Yeah?” Armin’s head pops around the doorframe, a dab of ketchup on the corner of his mouth.

“Wanna go to Paradise later?”

“The club?” Armin’s nose wrinkles. Connie’s head appears right beside Armin, a wide grin splitting his face.

“Oh, hell yeah,” Connie answers for both of them before Armin has the chance to shoot the idea down, “who’s going?”

“Like you don’t know the answer to that,” Armin scoffs, ducking back into the kitchen with a roll of his eyes.

“I never took her for a ‘club’ type of girl,” Connie adds air-quotes to emphasize his confusion.

Eren mulls that over for a moment; he doesn’t really take you for a club type of girl either, but from the sound of it, Historia and Sasha have already done the job of getting you good and drunk and talking you into a night on the town. Eren’s always wanted to see what you’re like when you’re well and truly fucked up; every time you indulge him with a story from college, he ends up laughing so hard he’s clutching his stomach and gasping for breath.

Supposedly, when you go all out, you drop the mom-friend act and become a little less tame; is this Eren’s opportunity to get an eyeful for himself? He’s not waiting around to find out.

Eren shrugs. “Come help me make these runs and we’ll go. Armin, you’re driving.”

The drop-offs are uneventful, and as soon as Eren steps foot inside the club, his nose scrunches with distaste. Ironically, he’s never been into the partying scene, much preferring a quiet beer at Scout’s or a blunt on the couch to a club. The music’s horribly loud, bass thudding through the fabric of his hoodie and beating against his chest, and as he looks for you, he can barely see through the mass of bodies and the fog machines. You’re here? It’s difficult for Eren to imagine you, in your favorite flannel and those cute little Vans he likes, tucked against the bar throwing back your signature craft beer. As Connie urges him and Armin in the direction of the bar, calling for green tea shots, Eren nearly regrets his decision, until fingernails dig into his shoulder, spinning him on his heels.

“Hey, you.”

Eren blinks stupidly as you grin up at him through thick, black lashes. He’s never even dared to imagine you like you are now, piercing eyes gazing up at him through a heavy dusting of makeup and the shortest, tightest dress Eren’s ever seen hugging every inch of your curves. You look sinful in a way he’s never seen you before, not even when he was holding you tight to him and wrenching out orgasm after orgasm from your body. He gulps.

“Holy shit– hey,” he lets you pull him in for an overexcited hug, bites down on the inside of his cheek to distract himself from the bulge already swelling in his pants.

“I missed you!” You pinch his cheeks, much to Eren’s dismay.

“Just saw you yesterday– quit pinchin’ me. What are you even doing here? Didn’t think this was your scene.” Eren has to actively keep his eyes trained on your face; there’s a little bead of sweat traveling down the expanse of skin between your breasts that’s making his mouth water. Friends, he scoffs in his mind. Are you trying to kill him?

“Well, it’s not, but Sasha says I need to be more fun, and Stor says I need to find a boyfriend.” You gesture around like it’s obvious. Eren cocks an eyebrow, ignoring the inappropriate envy that twists in his stomach at the mention of the word ‘boyfriend’.

Boyfriends never like the guy friends, it’s practically a law of nature. If you’re dating around, it’s only a matter of time before some square in a button-down steals you away from your coffee dates and movie nights with Eren, but he can’t get too caught up in that now, not when you’re looking up at him all dizzy and sexy and bursting at the seams.

“Don’t know if this is the place for that.”

“That’s what I said!” Oh, you’re drunk drunk, all of your movements overexaggerated and shaky. It makes him want to laugh seeing you like this; his little book nerd, trashed and mere inches away from having her ass out at a club. Well, either laugh or drag you into the bathroom to bend you over the sink. He can’t be sure.

“Hey mama!” Connie shouts over at you, handing you a shot. Eren has half a mind to snatch it out of his hand after catching the slurring in your voice, but he’s too late; you throw it back without so much as a shudder, grinning all wide and wet and pretty when you swallow.

“I didn’t think you’d actually show up,” you tell him, pulling him down by his collar so you can speak into his ear. Eren has to bite back a groan at the feel of your hot lips against his ear. Friends, he reminds himself urgently, pushing you back from him but keeping his hands firm on your hips, relishing in the way your flesh gives under his grip.

“You know the rules. You call, I come.”

“That’s what she said,” you snicker, pinching his cheek again.

“Cut that out!”

“Make me.” Oh fuck, Eren’s going to die. He’s going to die if you keep looking at him like that, bottom lip tucked between your teeth and fuck-me eyes on him.

“You’re not being very friendly,” he manages to choke out, trying his hardest to give you a suspicious look through the dizzying wave of images that flash through his brain. You with your mouth full of him. You spread out on his bed, back arched and fingers twisted in his hair. The little “o” your mouth made when you rode him for the first time. Eren wants to smack himself, jump in a cold shower, something. Get a grip, dude.

“Maybe not,” you shrug, eyes darting over to the bar. “Hurry up and grab a drink, I wanna dance.”

“Not much of a dancer,” Eren admits, taking the beer that Connie hands him.

“Don’t worry, I’ll do all the work.”

Eren isn’t sure if he likes or loves the sound of that, powerless against that stupid little dress you’ve got on as you drag him behind you to the mass of bodies he had so disdainfully eyed on his way in. He’s greeted by a loud round of shrieking, one more pinch to the cheek by Historia and a slap on the ass from Sasha. You make a show of teasing him for how pink his face gets, but luckily, your friends are instantly distracted by Armin and Connie’s arrival right behind him. You pull him back down, glossy lips pressed right against his ear.

“I really like this song.” You’re barely audible over the pounding music, but even if Eren hadn’t heard what you said, he’d get the gist from the way you grind against his thigh, slow and sensual. Maybe you are actually trying to kill him.

“Yeah?” He’s breathless, irreparably and embarrassingly caught in the little web you’ve woven.

“Yeah.” You’re moving harder against him now, throwing your arms around his neck and grinding your hips into his. Eren’s only thought is to let his hands fly back to your hips, let you use him like a stripper pole to show off.

He can feel eyes on him, not the eyes of friends, but of other men around him, wondering who the lucky asshole is that’s getting the royal treatment from a girl as hot as you. If he were to be truthful, it’s getting him off, how every eye is on you and, by proxy, him, holding you like a lifeline as you let the beat rock through your body.

So this, this is the party girl you claim to have living deep inside you. This seductive, electric creature moving tantalizing against his body, this is the source of the stories Historia tells him that make you blush? How you could ever be embarrassed of this is beyond him; you’re like a little devil, sent straight from hell just to torture him, and Eren’s mouth is watering.

Song after song goes by, and you don’t let up, don’t let him catch his breath for a moment, moving from facing him to pressing your ass into his crotch and then back again, arms above your head or wrapped around his neck. Eren wishes he was mentally sound enough at the moment to feel ashamed that you can absolutely feel how hard he is through his pants right now, but he’s drunk on you, letting you press into him so insistently he has to tug your dress down for you, letting you drive him so crazy that he’s grateful for the loud music now. He’d die if Connie or Armin could hear the way he’s grunting and groaning low under his breath, powerless underneath you.

Suddenly, as if you haven’t just been riling him up for the last half hour, you back away enough to face him, shaking your empty cup and him and mouthing something that Eren’s still too dizzy to make out.

“Huh?”

“Get me another drink!” you shout over the bass, laughing at him.

Eren nods stupidly, darting away from you before he can grab your jaw, pull your lips to his like he so desperately wants to. Finally out of the throng of bodies, he can feel his head clearing, some semblance of sanity crashing over him. What the fuck has gotten into him? It was just one night, and you’ve kept him at arm’s length ever since, only seeing each other under the guise of coffee, or a beer, or Eren insisting you need to continue your education in the wonders of horror films. You’re drunk, that’s the only explanation; drunk and teasing him like you aren’t going to wake up and throw him right back into the friendzone. He rests both elbows on the bar, shaking his head like he’ll be able to knock some sense into himself if he rattles his brain around a little.

Eren orders your vodka soda and a beer and a shot for himself, something to clear his head and keep his blood pressure manageable. Hopefully, at least.

When he turns around, drinks in hand, that plan flies out the door. There you are, center of the dance floor, hands above your head and hips moving like you’re intentionally trying to make him lose his fucking mind. He tilts his head in interest when a man approaches you, grazes his hands over your hips like he means to start grinding against you. Eren can feel his own hands tightening around the bottle and the plastic cup in his hand, but he holds himself back; he’s got no claim on you, and if you’re willing to entertain the man (who, if you ask Eren, is way below your standards), who is Eren to stop you?

You surprise him in the best way: when the man touches you lightly, you whip around, brows furrowed and a little glitter in your eyes so mean that even Eren nearly flinches. He can’t read your lips in the low light, but he snorts to himself anyway as the man puts his hands up and backs away from you, eyes wide. As if nothing had happened, you spin back on your heel, facing a cackling Sasha with a shrug.

Eren feels a wide, proud smile blooming on his face. As much as he feels an unwarranted protectiveness towards you, he likes watching you get your teeth out and stand up for yourself. Before he can make his way back over to tease you, a voice from his left makes his blood run cold.

“Rennie?!”

Two thin arms are tossed around his neck before Eren can even respond, the familiar scent of vanilla and coconut enveloping him.

“Breeze?” Eren chokes out, too shocked to keep his composure. She pulls away from him and grins, a little diamond glittering from her right canine tooth.

“You didn’t text me back, you tease,” she swats at his chest, snags the vodka soda he’d bought for you right out of his hand, taking a sip. Eren takes the opportunity to swallow hard around the lump in his throat, one last tentative glance towards you before he turns his gaze back to Breeze.

She’s cut her hair, something short and choppy that swings around her ears, and fuck, she’s still just as pretty as he remembers, little freckles on her button nose visible in the darkness of the club.

“Didn’t think you wanted to see me,” Eren shrugs, forcing his face to remain schooled into one of cold apathy. She had left him, like he was nothing to her. He hates her, he realizes, god, he hates her so much it burns in his veins. Breeze cocks her head, frowning.

“Why would you think that?”

“You fucking left me, Breeze, don’t be stupid,” Eren makes a move to steal the drink back from her, but she holds it close enough to her chest that he’d have to practically grope her to take it, and his fingers recoil at the realization.

“Are you double-fisting, or did you buy this for someone special?” She teases, brushing right over Eren’s bristly demeanor. When he doesn’t answer, she raises her eyebrows. “It’s for someone. Well, point her out! Is she cute?”

Breeze turns on her heel, standing on her tiptoes to glance through the crowd. Before he can stop himself, Eren’s grabbing her upper arm, spinning her back to face him with anger blazing in his eyes. When he meets her gaze, her baby blues are alight with mischief, and he knows that no matter which direction he moves, he’s losing whatever little game she has him trapped in. That was the thing about Breeze; Eren was always losing her games.

“Fuck, just…just stop it, Breeze. What are you even doing here?”

“I’m back in town, didn’t you see my text?” Breeze shrugs innocently, sipping your drink.

“Okay, well, welcome back,” Eren deadpans, leaving her question hanging in the air between them. He turns back to the bar to order another cocktail for you, having given up hope of getting the first one back from Breeze, but she’s relentless, has always been that way. She slides up to the bar beside him, smiling demurely up at him.

“I missed you, you know.”

“Wouldn’t have guessed,” Eren scoffs, rolling his eyes. Breeze flinches, but Eren knows her better than that. It’s all an act, it always is.

“I never realized how much I hurt you,” her fingers grazing over his cheek nearly burn with how cold they are in contrast to the heavy, thick air around them, “‘m sorry, Rennie.”

“It’s fine.” Eren hates the way he twitches and nearly leans into her touch when she swipes her fingers over him. How many times has he thought about this, seeing her again after all these years? Everything he’s planned out, everything he’s ever wanted to say is lodged in his throat, a jumble of letters and words so squished out of order that they no longer hold meaning. He doesn’t love her, not anymore, but his body reacts before his brain can stop it, a conditioned response.

“Can we talk about it soon? Maybe over coffee?” Blue eyes blinking up at him earnestly.

“There’s nothing to talk about, Breeze,” Eren rolls his eyes, swallowing thick around the knot in his throat.

“There is,” she insists, “I brought this amazing espresso blend back with me from Florence, and–”

“If I say yes, will you leave me alone for tonight?” Eren can feel the exasperation in his tone, can feel the weight of his mistake weighing on his shoulders. It’s fine, he tells himself, he’ll make up some excuse and get out of it. A long conversation with Breeze about their breakup is the last thing he needs.

“Maybe,” Breeze tucks her lip in between her teeth, a little smile playing at the corner of her mouth, “unless you change your mind.”

“We can talk or whatever another time, but I’m going back to my friends, okay? Go find yours.”

“You’re my friend,” Breeze purrs, one hand stroking over Eren’s bicep, “and I haven’ seen you int–”

“Don’t push it,” Eren nearly growls, scowling down at her. He knows half of the hatred buzzing through his veins is reserved for himself, but he’ll unpack that at home with a blunt, not in the middle of the club with you waiting for him on the dance floor and Breeze staring up at him hungrily.

“Always wound so tight,” Breeze hums, reaching a hand up to squish his cheeks, “but fine. I’ll see you soon.”

She miraculously leaves him there with nothing but a wink, taking your vodka soda with her; Eren’s shoulders slump in relief. Knowing Breeze, it was a wonder she hadn’t tackled him right there. When he turns around for the second time, two drinks in hand, you’re already staring at him. Shit.

You don’t look mad– and why would you be? You’re friends, Eren reminds himself. There’s no reason for you to know who Breeze is; he’s never told you about her, and he never planned on doing so. Eren knows Historia, though, well enough to believe that she told you everything from the godforsaken moment he walked into your apartment that day. 

He doesn’t like that look you’ve got, though; again, not mad, but he can see the gears turning behind your eyes. Eren has to practically force himself to walk towards you. Your head’s cocked in confusion, something watery and hesitant glimmering in your eyes through the low lighting. If he didn’t know better, he’d say you almost look hurt, but that wouldn’t be fair, would it? You didn’t want him, you had made that abundantly clear.

“Sorry it took me a while. Long line.” Eren hands you your drink, nearly wincing at how naturally the clearly false statement rolls off his tongue.

“Mhm,” you nod, downing nearly half of your drink in one long slurp. Your movements aren’t fluid and dynamic anymore; you’re stiff as a board, bouncing back and forth on the balls of your feet along to the beat of the song. “I…I actually have to pee, do you mind holding this?”

“Now?” Eren blinks, confused. “I just got your drink.”

You offer him a tight smile. “I wanted to wait ‘til you were back, so you could watch my drink. And so you didn’t think I ran off on you or something.”

“Oh, yeah, go ahead.”

He watches you slink away into the crowd, watches the dozens of eyes follow you, surely wondering what happened to the little firecracker in the middle of the dance floor. Eren knows you get like this sometimes, suddenly pensive and nostalgic, knows that per your own admission, you like to handle it yourself. He hadn’t done this to you, had he?

A firm pinch to his cheek distracts him, pulls him down a foot below his normal standing height. Could everyone just stop pinching his fucking face? “Shit, ow!”

“Was that Breeze?” Historia yells directly into his ear. Eren, six-foot-something of hell on wheels, blushes furiously.

“Dude, was that fucking Breeze, or am I too fucked up?” Connie echoes Historia’s sentiment from over her shoulder, eyes comically wide. Armin’s peering around him, eyes flitting back and forth between Eren, Connie, and Historia as he tries to understand what’s happened.

“Who cares?” Eren snaps at Connie. Historia’s grip on his face loosens, releases entirely. If Eren didn’t like the look that you had given him, he hates the look Historia’s shooting at him right now. All daggers and disappointment. She turns on her heel without another word, making a beeline for the bathroom and dragging Sasha along behind her. Eren doesn’t miss Armin’s eyes either; stripping him to the bone without saying a word.

“Quit looking at me like that,” Eren scoffs, waves a hand in Armin’s direction.

“When did Breeze get back into town?” Armin shouts over the music.

“A few weeks ago,” Eren admits, avoiding Armin’s eyes and looking for a spot at the bar where he can escape the heavy gazes of his friends, run away to drown this conversation in a shot of whiskey.

“Did you–”

“I don’t know, man, you know how she is. She just showed up.” Eren knows he’s being unnecessarily gruff, but in his defense, the last hour or so has been a whirlwind of memory and emotion and lust that he doesn’t have the capacity to deal with.

Armin nods simply, takes a sip of his beer. Eren’s known Armin since they were kids, and he knows Armin can read him like a book. If he had a little less pride, Eren would pull Armin to the side and ask if he can make any sense of what’s going through Eren’s head right now because Eren sure as hell can’t. There’s you, with your skimpy dress and your flirty eyes, grinding on him like you’re going to take him home and fuck him stupid again, like you hadn’t demanded an honest-to-god friendship that Eren happens to very much enjoy. On the other hand, there’s Breeze, flighty and just as much of a ghost as she is a real person, popping back into his life and batting her blue eyes at him like she’d never left.

You’re his friend, and Breeze is his terrible ex. There shouldn’t be a choice here– there isn’t, it’s just the way things are, but Eren feels stuck at a crossroads for some reason.

He finally gets fed up with the music and the bumping of bodies around him and storms off to the bar again, biting back the urge to snap at Connie and Armin who he knows are hot on his heels. Eren’s just looked up from the shot of whiskey burning its way down his throat, acknowledging the dizziness that’s come with his drinks for the night, when he spots you.

You don’t look angry, that’s a small mercy you unwittingly grant him, but you’re cowering. Historia, even being shorter than you, is practically pinning you to the wall outside of the bathroom, shouting at you with her finger in your face. Sasha doesn’t look all too pleased either, arms crossed and a deep scowl written into her features. Eren gets a glimpse of your phone in Historia’s other hand that she’s waving around erratically, and wonders what the hell happens in women’s bathrooms. He’s not exactly sure what prompts it, but he checks his own phone. Nothing.

“Are they fighting?” Connie asks, nose scrunched as he peeks around Eren’s arm.

“Looks like it,” Armin nods, wincing as you try to make a grab for your phone from Historia, resulting in Sasha saving you at the last second from face-planting as Historia holds it out of your reach.

“Should we, like, do something?”

“Absolutely not,” Armin and Eren echo each other, looking at Connie as if he’d just suggested they all walk into oncoming traffic.

Eren watches as Historia grabs you by the wrist and drags you out of the bar, your feeble protests doing nothing to stop her insistent steps. Sasha follows both of you, gently pushing you along by the small of your back and shooting a regretful glance at Connie, mouthing a sorry as you all make your exit. It’s hardly been five minutes before Eren’s phone buzzes.

> had to leave. do you mind paying our tab if i venmo you? it’s under reiss.

Eren bites the inside of his cheek again, not worrying in the slightest about covering the tab, but more so the reason for your abrupt exit.

> yeah i got u everything ok?

> thanks a ton! see u next time.

It’s purposefully avoidant, especially coming from Historia, who never misses a chance to make fun of you good-naturedly. If you had been sick in the bathroom or far too drunk to stay, she would have come out and said it. Eren throws his card down, going to pay the hefty tab you and your friends racked up, but not daring to pay his own. After all of the shit that’s just gone down, he owes himself at least one more drink.

Once he’s signed, he pulls out his phone again, thumb hovering over your text thread, then Breeze’s, then yours again. Mindful of Armin’s prying eye over his shoulder, Eren sighs heftily and shuts his phone off, leaning in to order another shot. The following morning’s approaching quickly, whether he wants it to or not, and he’ll save his fucked-up emotions for the daylight.

[slightlyhopefulromantic]

seemed like a good time to come back and finalize my hero design. looks at episode 35. there have definitely been some um. small changes to my ideas but i ended up keeping the same basic ideas because i was attached. some small extra notes below:

originally, hero was supposed to look a LOT like my rebecca design but with shorter hair and the nose i give all oaks, but i ended up giving her the twins' coloration (except for her hair being a lil bit darker) instead because uh. The Drama. i also gave her golden piercings instead of the black i planned on initially since i give lark a gold earring

i debated a lot on if i wanted to keep the "steals lark's shirts" headcanon, since he seems fairly responsible for a lot of her training, but i ended up just adjusting it a little bit. i figure she probably borrowed her uncle's clothes a lot during her training sessions, once her clothes were wrecked and so she grew used to the idea of lark's shirts = she could find comfort in the idea of being Done. i like characters having complicated conflicting feelings on their guardians, lol

i did fully change it so that she gave normal the Oak Necklace i draw all the oak boys with instead of just giving it back to lark, though. that is no longer a trans thing, that is fully a "i am pissed at my dad and dad-uncle" thing

also, she has a few scars now! i imagine that they're always explained away as hero being a clumsy kid but uh. well. We Know What's Going On There. and i did purposefully give her a facial scar to mirror my lark design's facial scar (though it's over her eyebrow instead of across her nose).

she still gets to be taller than everyone else, though. she deserves it

[bloodrevel]

20 TAV/OC QUESTIONS

I saw saw @galesdevoteewife's post about her Tav & decided I wanted to do it too :) I'm tagging everyone who wants to do this & pls tag me if you do, I love seeing people's Tavs! <3

Senna, my scrunkly half wood elf ranger/druid/favoured of mielikki blorbo who was quite literally raised by wolves :) <3

I. what do they smell like at their freshest? (and/or after a tenday. your choice)

She generally smells like wolf fur, fresh earth, herbs and Felsul flower oil when she can make or buy it (Felsul are common in the Cloakwood where she grew up but she can't always find them while on the road).

II. what would their blood taste like to vampires?

Crisp, a little sweet, and a little tart, like an apple.

III. how would they kiss their LI?

Sen doesn't do anything by halves; she kisses passionately, fiercely, with wild abandon. She doesn't hold anything back and gives all of herself when she loves someone.

IV. how do they sleep with their LI (what position, does one steal the blankets, is one too hot/cold, etc)?

She loves being warm and cosy and cuddling. Without Gale she always sleeps snuggled up with her wolf, Fey, but when she sleeps with Gale it's with her face nuzzled into the crook of his shoulder, his arms wrapped around her and their legs tangled together, or they switch between being the big spoon or little spoon depending on the night/what they feel like.

And Fey is still included of course! If she's sleeping facing Gale, her wolf sleeps at her back. If she's sleeping with her back against Gale, she's cuddling Fey and her face is snuggled into her fur <3

V. what does their tent area look like? where do they prefer to pitch their tent (next to water, covered on three sides, etc)?

Her tent is a simple muted green, made to blend in with the forest. Inside she has a raggedy patchwork blanket, a bedroll, an old velvet pillow for Fey, a small wooden box of needle and thread for patching up her clothes, some ink pots, quills and a stack of journals. Outside she has a few small plant pots where she grows herbs and tea leaves and whatever weed she smokes in her dad's old pipe lol

VI. if they had a set of dnd dice, what would they look like?

These Feywild dice I found on the nexus (they're what I use in game)

VII. do they collect anything (gems, bottles, keys, etc)?

She collects random things that catch her eye like rocks, gems and feathers, as well as herbs, and she's also very sentimental so if anyone gives her anything, she keeps it (like the story Mirkon wrote her after she saved him, for example). When she gets into a relationship with Gale she starts collecting recipes to cook with him, plus all the poetry he writes for her, as well as poetry she comes across that she thinks he'll like (she doesn't write poetry herself).

VIII. if either, are they part of the astarion/gale book club (magic & literature) or the wyll/shadowheart book club (trashy romance novels)?

She's part of the Astarion/Gale book club. She loves books on flora and fauna, and she's curating her own florilegium with descriptions and illustrations of all the herbs, plants, flowers and animals she comes across on her travels.

IX. if they had to be put in a “get along shirt” with a companion, who would it be?

Oh it'd be Lae'zel for sure. They're both very headstrong and confident and think their way is the right way, so in the beginning they butt heads and challenge each other a lot. Each grows to respect the other for their determination and strength over time, and they end up forming a strong bond because of it.

Woe be upon ye who tries to shove them into that shirt though, you'll end up on the wrong end of a Gith sword AND stuck with a hide full of arrows.

X. do they prefer speak with dead or speak with animals?

She only uses speak with animals, Gale uses speak with dead.

XI. what are their thoughts on clowns?

She's never seen one until the Circus of the Last Days, and she's not at all interested in them/doesn't really get it. She just does one of her little head tilts and looks at them like... hmm...what odd people...and then gets distracted by the dryad, who she absolutely moons over.

XII. their companions are gossiping about them behind their back! who is it and what are they saying?

It's probably Astarion and Shadowheart, and they're probably either complaining about how much of an annoyingly cheery, energetic morning person she is, or mocking her obvious lovesickness over Gale.

XIII. what makes them laugh? what does their laugh sound like?

Wolf antics, Gale's complaints whenever they have to sneak, Gale's comments while on the battlefield, Gale in general (their senses of humour are well aligned), Astarion's histrionics, Astarion and Shadowheart's snarky conversations, Karlach's jokes, Wyll's utter intolerance for poorly performed music, Lae'zel's mispronunciation of common words.

She laughs heartily, warmly, and without restraint - pretty much the way she does everything.

XIV. do they have any inside jokes among their companions?

She's not much of a "hey wanna hear this joke" kind of person, but she undoubtedly has things that are uniquely funny to her and her companions based on the experiences they had together, as you do when you spend a lot of time / go through a lot with people. Like, "Hey, remember that time..."

XV. what’s the description of their camp clothes in the inventory menu?

Her dress: a lovely dress made of a soft, well-worn green cloth, with flowers stitched into the bodice and an intricate woven belt around the waist (it doesn't have a description so I wrote this one).

Her boots: made of intertwining branches that wrap around the foot like nature's embrace.

XVI. what’s the description of their underwear in the inventory menu?

Again it doesn't have a description, but I imagine it'd say something like "Plain, simple cotton undergarments".

XVII. how do they celebrate their birthday?

She doesn't know when it is, so she celebrates the day her dad adopted her instead, which was Ches 3. She spends the day gathering berries and baking a pie with them, as that's what her dad used to do for her every year.

XVIII. what modern day tv show would they binge over a weekend? do they get their LI to watch with them?

She probably wouldn't watch TV much, but I think she'd enjoy nature documentaries, and she'd get Gale to watch with her and then blab random facts at him the whole time.

XIX. do you have a playlist for your tav? if so, what’s the title + description?

I'm in the middle of working on one, the title of and first song on it is Raised by Wolves by The Interrupters, and sums Senna up perfectly: My teeth got sharper, my skin got tough So I forgive you for your giving up For your giving up It doesn't matter, my life was shattered And my heart's got holes You left a child out in the wild And I was raised by wolves I was raised by wolves, ah-ooh I was raised by wolves, ah-ooh

Yeah, when you left and said goodbye Under the moonlight, we had to learn to stay alive In the wild

XX. if you were to try pickpocketing them, what would they be carrying?

In her pockets she just carries some coins and hair ties, and in her backpack she carries her current leatherbound journal, a pot of ink, a couple quills, a folded piece of parchment that has been read many times (it's her favourite poem Gale wrote for her), maps, some healing potions, a satchel of herbs and other alchemy ingredients, trap disarming tools, travel rations (including a wedge of cheese with a big bite taken out of it), a waterskin, and a mess kit.

[currymuncherxxx0]

Obey me demon brothers with a Chav! Mc

Okay so this hc is gonna be comedy lol. Its the obey me brothers with an mc who is such a chav. A chav is basically a very popular British girl in British schools or anywhere it doesn't have be in school lol. If you're British you'll understand lmao. #chav

As you arrived in devildom you had a very salty look on your face. Your fake lashes falling off, your face looking disgusted and your orange foundation and dark contour stands out.

Lucifer: Lucifer will obviously be very annoyed and irritated. This human causes more chaos than mammon himself. She's too loud and petty. And not to forget, the litres of Victoria's secret perfume sprayed on herself and in her room. It killed his airways. Lucifer comes to her to scold her about spraying too much perfume in the house of lamentation until she replies "Oh my god bruv, it actually bare stinks in this room yeah, you lot need to know what hygiene is." With that, Lucifer got frustrated. "MC! DON'T YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENS IF YOU CONTINUE TO SPRAY PERFUME IN THE HOUSE??! IT WILL DAMAGE THE AIR!!" "Okay and, I don't care fam. It still smells like clapped pussios." Lucifer gets more confused now. More and more confused. He don't know a single thing about British slang. But as time went on, the MC and lucifer did have a love hate relationship. In fact, Lucifer even wanted to visit London with MC.

Mammon: Being the second born tsundere, Mammon is obviously gonna be like, "Oi, I don't like ya, MC!" and then he blushes. But when the MC is like, "Okay and? You keep staring at me like a bare madman still. You're clapped anyways." Mammon got more confused. What is clapped? As soon as he finds out what it actually means, Mammon starts sobbing into his pillows every day and night. Although Mammon was an idiot, he was never insulted by someone he loved. Since all of his brothers treated him like shit and insulted him badly. He had to cope with that trauma. A few weeks later, the MC realises how much she's hurt his feelings. "Look bruv. I'm sorry, okay? Look, I didn't mean to hurt your feelings still. It's just that I grew up having to be a salty skept. Forgive me still." With that, Mammon is a bit skeptical but forgives mc. The next time any roadman try to shank MC up, Mammon is here with her in his demon form. And if any girl tries to steal Mammon away from the MC, MC will smoke them still.

Leviathan: Now we all know that Levi is always in his room, watching some random h3nt@1 shit or playing video games. And he probably didn't shower for weeks. And because of that, MC does laugh at him. "Oi you man. What the fuck did you do with your hair, why does it look like some purple bowl? Are you Justin Bieber on crack mate? You're butters! Take a shower as well, fam." With that, Levi was just like "w-well you're obviously not gonna l-like a-an o-otaku like m-me." I swear, this guy gives pick me boy vibes. But the second that Levi takes off his shirt and his toned, outlined 6 pack and chest is showing, the MC is more confused now and also intrigued. "O-oi, MC, s-stop l-looking at me!" "Alai, you're actually so fit icl. You're leng. Since when did you have a chocolate bar shaped body when you're in that prison all day just busting shit?? You're tasty, bruv." And with that, the two of them have hate love relationships again. Levi swears to protect the MC from the opps. And MC swears to scrap anyone who even steals her bf away.

Satan: Well, Satan does has anger and daddy issues. So don't fuck with him or else you'll get smoked by him innit. "Oi, you! Yeah you, you yeah! You look like Cat Noir from poundland still." With that, Satan gets angry. "Well at least I'm smarter than you, kid." He's a bit angry. "You're calling big man a kid?? Nah. I'm a big man, pussio. I'll chef you and your dad up, wait you have daddy issues lololol" Satan has turned intona green flash and then into his demon form. "WTF DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME, B***!! ILL FUCKNG BREAK YOUR NECK!!" Satan was destroying everything around him now. "Okay okay fam, calm down fam. No need to act mental and that, get a grip mate. Sorry fam. Geez, you're so sensitive blud." Throughout time, they're still enemies. Yeah.

Asmodeus: Asmo is gonna be the one that the MC hates the most. MC thinks that he's too feminine as a man. As Asmo applies a heavy amount of foundation, concealer, contour, blusher, face powder, glittery pink, orange and yellow eyeshadow, thick eyeliner, long long false lashes, highlighter, bronzer and purple lipstick, MC just looks at him, weirdly. "What the fuck are you doing, bruv? You look bare zesty." Asmo does not know a single thing about British slang so instead he says this. "Oh, sorry for stating the facts that I'm beautiful hun. You're just jealous that I can blend my contour and concealer better than you, you just look more orange than Donald trump, your crusty musty looking concealer lips." MC gets angry. "Oi, what the fuck did you just say to me, bruv?? Do you wanna scrap?? I'll smoke you fam, don't fuck with me innit." Asmo isn't scared at all. "Well try and do that, love. You won't be able to walk the next day, hun~~~ 😏" of course he's gonna be some horny ass mf.

Beelzebub: Tbh, I think MC would kind of get along with Beel. Yes, she would find it irritating that beel eats the whole fridge but still. I have a feeling tha MC would actually have a crush on Beel. "Oi, Ed Sheeran looking man! Yeah you! You're leng still! You look fit! Man eats the whole fridge and still has bare tits and biceps." And yeah, MC and beel just have a nice friendship. As time went on, Beel smoked more oops and roadmen who touched MC and MC scrapped any chav that would lay a finger on her bodybuilder bf.

Sorry I didn't add belphie, I'll try to do that in the next part 😭

[milkywaygg]

FOP- Lost Child Ch. 5

Gonna update the story on fanfiction in the morning. I’ve just gotten back from a football game and I’m a bit too sleepy right now to care lol. Here’s the next chapter though. While Darren finished up in the shower, Linnie had gotten around to wiping down the dinner table one last time before Cosmo had arrived, checking on the potatoes and chicken that were being cooked on the stove and oven respectively. After finishing the cleaning, he poofed out a green table cloth and set the table, putting a plate, fork, and knife at each placement, alongside a glass for everyone to have a drink.

“Julie, what would you like to drink, sweetie?” Linnie asked, smiling kindly, “Did you like the apple juice you had this morning?”

“Uhm, yes please.”, Julie said quietly, as Linnie got out a plastic cup for the kids, pouring apple juice into Julie’s, setting it down on one of the open seats. Not too much longer after, Darren had gotten out of the shower, sporting a black t-shirt and light blue jeans, headed to the fridge for a beer.

“Uhm, Darren, maybe you could hold off on the drinking tonight?”, Linnie asked, “Cosmo’s bringing the kids over and I don’t think we should be drinking around any children to keep them safe.”

“Why? It’s just a beer.”, Darren shrugged, before Linnie gave a pleading look, forcing him to roll his eyes and put it back, “God, fine.”

“It’ll only be for tonight dear, and after they’re gone, you can have one if you want….I guess. Just not around Cassia and Poof.”, Linnie lectured before hearing the door knock, “I think he’s here. Just try to be polite.”

Darren couldn’t help but feel somewhat nervous as Linnie began walking to door. Ever since his arrest 10,000 years ago, Darren wasn’t sure if there was much else he could say. I’m sorry for stealing? I’m sorry for letting our family down? On top of it all, Darren was pleading mentally to himself that Cosmo didn’t bring Wanda. He watched solemnly as Linnie finally answered the door, sighing in relief as he didn’t see a sign of pink anywhere, other than Cassia’s star headband.

“Hi sweetie, I’m glad you could make it after all.”, Linnie hugged Cosmo, “No Wanda?”

“Nope. She’s still working. I swear, one of these days I’m going to call her dad and ask her what gives, and why he can’t get one of his little goons to do the job.”, Cosmo smirked, nudging the kids and himself inside, clutching a black, paper bag in his right hand, and the Star Liquor logo written elegantly in white cursive. Upon seeing the bag, Linnie frowned disappointedly.

“Oh dear, Cosmo. I really wish you wouldn’t have brought that-”, Linnie jumped, Cosmo’s harsh tone barking suddenly.

“Hey, you didn’t say a damn thing about no alcohol and you know I get withdrawal symptoms easily, so I don’t want to hear jack shit!” Cosmo screamed suddenly, shoving himself into the house past Linnie, putting the bottle on the table and cracking it open, pouring the wine into one of the open glasses.

‘Oh..uhm…I-I’m sorry dear, I didn’t mean to..It’s just you know how I feel about alcohol and I just thought it would be nice to have an alcohol-free dinner, especially with the kids...…oh…”, Linnie muttered, Julie shaking in her seat as she watched Cosmo take his seat, while Linnie desperately tried to find a way to change the conversation. Frowning deeply, Darren took a seat on one of the ends of the table, catching Cosmo by surprise.

“Damn, someone’s in a shity mood.”, Darren commented, Linnie scolding him for his language in the background, “What’s wrong. Cat got your tongue?”

“Uh…I-I just didn’t expect you here. When did you get out, and what are you doing here? Don’t you have your own apartment to go to?”, Cosmo asked.

“About a few months ago, and no, I got evicted since I wasn’t paying my rent, not that it’s any of your business.”, Darren snarked. Cosmo rolled his eyes.

“Go figure.”, he said, looking towards his kids, “Cassia, Poof, this is your Uncle Darren, my older brother. Darren, Cassia, Poof.”

“Uh hey kids.”, Darren waved awkwardly, looking towards Julie, “Uh..this is Julie. This is the kid we found on the streets and are trying to find her parents. Think she’s about your age, Poof. 5,000?”

“Her hair’s so pretty!”, Poof cheering, catching Julie’s attention. Instead of thanking him however, she blushed shyly and smiled, Cosmo’s eyes rolling and looking at Julie.

“You know, you could say thank you. That’s what you do when someone compliments you. It’s not hard.”, Cosmo snapped, “Alongside, washing your hair.”

“Alright Cosmo, let’s not talk to her like that please.”, Linnie said gently, “She’s going through a lot right now, and I invited you and your family over to discuss the situation with her, in case we need your help with anything.”

“Uh…Dad? Meet me in the hallway real fast?”, Darren asked, surprised by Cosmo’s recent behavior. Linnie nodded and followed him, making sure the two of them were unheard, “Uh..did something happen to Cosmo or something? What the hell’s his problem?”

“Well..”, Linnie sighed sadly, trying to shake it off and lower his voice, “He’s been going through a tough time with his marriage, and recently, he’s had a miscarriage. Everything’s just been going downhill for him ever since. He’s a lot snippier than a few years back, and his patience for things has just been withering.”

“Yeah, because last time, I don’t remember having an entitled piece of shit for a brother.”, Darren snarled, ignoring Linnie’s plea to stop cussing, “I’m not wrong though! He shouldn’t have yelled at you like that and you should have told him off.”

“I know dear, but honestly, I��m a little more concerned about the Julie situation at the moment. Don’t worry, I do plan on talking to Cosmo about his behavior this evening, but we really need to figure this Julie situation out right now. In the meantime, just try to bare with me, ok?”

Without much choice, Darren nodded as the two made their way back towards the kitchen, clearing their plates and taking their glasses into the living room, Cosmo carrying the wine bottle to the coffee table, much to Linnie’s discomfort. After dinner, Poof and Cassia ran towards Cosmo, with Julie not too far behind them. 

“Daddy? Daddy, can we and Julie play after dinner?”, Poof asked, his eyes sparkling with excitement. 

“I guess so. Just don’t be too loud. The adults and I have something to discuss.”, Cosmo said, offering the bottle of wine to Darren and Linnie. Linnie shook his head while Darren helped himself, nearly pouring the wine out of the glass. The dinner was silent and awkward, with Darren and Cosmo casting silent looks at each other, while Linnie looked nervous the entire time. It wasn’t until the children were sent off to play with some of the toys Linnie had provided, that the talk started, Cosmo pouring himself and Darren more wine. 

“So, what is this about? What’s with that girl, and why was she so rude when Poof complimented her earlier?”, Cosmo demanded, “You know he’s just about the nicest boy there is, so I want to make sure he gets the respect he deserves. Seems like this Julie girl needs to be taught some manners.”

“Cosmo, I really wish you wouldn’t be so hard on her.”, Linnie sighed, “Darren found her actually. He had a job interview and found her on his way home, cold, and hungry. We don’t know where the people that left her there are, she barely has any clothes that fit or are clean, and to top if off, there’s a bunch of scars on her legs and arms.”

“And none of those are self-inflicted?”

“Cosmo, come on. She’s a little kid. I seriously doubt she’d do something like that.”, Darren commented, “She has been very skittish around her though. Just the other day, she pissed all over the carpet when she needed the bathroom.”

“Seriously?”, Cosmo snarled, “I mean, I get that she’s scared right now. I would be too, but it’s not hard to go to the bathroom.”

“Darren, we don’t need to keep bringing that up, please.”, Linnie sighed, feeling as his words were going in one ear and out the other, “Anyways, I’ve just been so worried and stressed out about her, and I don’t think she has a home that’s taking care of her right now.”

“Right, and what’s that got to do with me?” Cosmo asked, sipping the wine, “I’m not looking to adopt. I wanted my own child, and plus, I don’t need another child for Wanda to ignore and act like they don’t exist.”

“Yes no, we’re not offering her. After all, we still need to figure out where she came from.”, Linnie stuttered, “I was just wondering if maybe we could have you help out when we need it. Maybe if Darren and I aren’t home, you could watch her for a little while, and I’m sure Cassia and Poof would like another playmate.”

“Maybe. I guess I could talk to Wanda about it if she ever gets her ass home, hic.”, Cosmo hiccuped, the wine really kicking in his system, “Tell you what though, she better learn some manners before then. At the very least please and thank you.”

“We’ll work on that.”, Linnie said quietly, before hearing a phone ring, coming from Cosmo’s pants pocket.

“Hang on.”, Cosmo said, headed towards the hallway, picking up his phone, “Hello? I’m at Dad’s, Wanda. Yes, the kids are with me too. No, you didn’t communicate that with me! Why do you only ever call me or talk to me when you need shit huh? Why don’t you ever call me to check on me and the kids? You think you’re too good for a family now, huh? Fine, see you later. Don’t bother picking me up.”

“Uhm..”, Linnie said softly, “So given the circumstances, I”m guessing you need to stay the night dear?”

“Well duh. I’ve been drinking, hadn’t I? Obviously I can’t go nowhere.”, Cosmo said sarcastically, “Do you have any more spare mattresses?”

“Well…no. I-I think if you want to take one of the couches, I can take the other, and then Cassia, Julie, and Poof can all sleep on my bed in the master room and Darren just sleep in his room, and we can take you home in the morning before I head to work.”

“Can’t I just take the bed and the kids take the couch? They’re smaller.”, Cosmo complained, getting Darren angry.

“Goddamn, just do what dad says already and quit acting like such an asshat. This isn’t your fucking house!”, Darren screamed, Linnie rubbing his temples, and feeling his heart pounding from all the stress he had been experiencing.

“You know what?”, he yelled suddenly, standing up, “Darren, watch the kids for a few minutes and you two figure it out. I don’t care right now. I-I..I think I'm going on a walk.”

[melishade]

🌻?

I'll talk about some of the other shows and movies that I like to watch and music I listen to.

I know I focus a lot on the Transformers fandom and Attack on Titan, but obviously they are not the only shows I watch.

Sometimes I'll watch mindless humor like American Dad, Family Guy, and Ridiculousness. Because when you're doing full time work and full time school, sometimes it's just better to turn your brain off after grueling hours of work.

Shows that I love to watch are Craig of the Creek, The Amazing World of Gumball, Bluey, Moon Girl and Devil Dinosaur, ROTTMNT, B99, Arcane, Lego Monkie Kid, ATLA. I'm certain that I'm missing some, but that's what's usually on my radar.

Movies I like: Snowpiercer, Everything, Everywhere, All At Once, Black Panther 1 and 2, Coraline, The Woman King, Spiderman: Into the Spiderverse, that Santa Claus movie where Santa just beats the shit out of everyone, Jordan Peele Movies like Us and Nope.

I've also watched a lot of anime in my years since 2009. Sonic X was how I got into it and the list just kept growing. I watched and read every anime/manga I could get my hands on. I don't do it at the same frequency that I do now, and as you get older, you realize how problematic anime is Lol. So, I've watched Sonic X, Dragon Ball Z and Hellsing Ultimate (Both original and abridged: Go TeamFourStar), Xenoglossa, High School of the Dead (Too much fan service but interesting take on the zombie genre), Death Note, Cowboy Bebop, +Anima (I did some drawings for that when I was on Deviantart and I still have them), Something about a Dark Angel that steals a bunch of art work, Tokyo Mew Mew (with some toxic ass love interests), There was a manga about a train, Aventura (Never continued, disappointed), Spy X Family, Clock Striker, Full Metal Alchemist (Kind of. Never watched it in full but I've come across the major plot points), Naruto (simply because my cousins were into it. The Kayuga plot line was bullshit), started Bleach (Never really got past the Aizen reveal), A lot of knock out mecha anime shows ironically excluding Guren Lagan, My Hero Academia I only keep track of because I like the Todoroki family drama, Future Diary (Toxic as hell), Akame ga Kill (Kind of like Attack on Titan: everyone is a red shirt), Maid-Dragon Kobayashi (used to like it, looking back hate the wizard kid and the dragon and whatever the fuck is going on with the red hair dragon and the big tits), King of Thorn, the Pokemon Movies only, and I'm blanking on the rest since a lot of them were obscure manga I found at my local library. I'm surprised I remembered this much.

Games I play: Pokemon Go and Sky Children of the Light (If you want to play with me, PM me.

Music I listen to: Imagine Dragons, Les Friction, Hadestown, Cody Fry, Tobe Nwigwe, Soundtrack Music like Samuel Kim (ADHD brain. It scratches an itch), AJR, the rest is kind of obscure. It might be an album of collaborating artist for a movie, like the Lion King: the Gift or the Arcane Album.

Shows I don't like/won't watch: Reality TV like the Bachelor, cheesy long-winded high school romance dramas that clear do the whole back stabbing/will they won't they. My sister watched it a lot and I always hated how it dragged on. Degrassi was way too much. One Piece is too long. I'll sometimes check in the fandom to see what's going on. Last time I check, Amalee was the Uta chick. Game of Thrones. Not a fan of the back stabbing and *nc*st. The Walking Dead seems like a show that just dragged on for too long.

I am certain I'm blanking on some shit right now but that's all I have to say.

[2r0i2p0]

red, mulberry & denim

Red: Describe your favourite shirt

It’s a 2 way tie between:

1) A huge knitted grey sweater my grandmother made for her husband (my grandfather who died before I was born) that was passed down to my dad. It’s all just grey but the arm is a slightly different shade of grey so I guess she ran out of that color lol. My dad still owns it but I steal from his wardrobe all the time so it counts. anddddd…

2) A beige shirt of an anime style Kate Bush from that one photoshoot of her as a knight. I’m linking it even tho it says to describe because I love it.

Mulberry: Earbuds or headphones?

Stylistically and quality wise headphones. I don’t have a pair of headphones though and use AirPods exclusively -_- I’ve had them for ages and they still work pretty good + are discreet in public so people don’t think I’m ignoring them. But I’d love to in the future invest in a good pair of like over the head headphones.

Denim: Kill the spider or take it outside?

Outside if it’s warm out. I leave them be if it’s winter or relocate them (eg if it’s in my room I’ll move it to the kitchen or something). :-) Despite going by the name Spider I am a really horrible arachnophobe to irrational degrees and am slowly trying to overcome that so I usually just let them be and cohabitate with them.

[lifeandtimesofallmyfandoms]

So after an altercation that I saw at a bus station yesterday I finally got something that I've been meaning to get, well ever since coming to live by myself lol

I feel like the bright pink is a good "stay away from me!" Kind of color lol Hopefully I'll never have to actually use it Already practiced with it a couple of times, super easy, super quick, the keychain has a quick release button on it etc And it wasn't a bad price!

THE ALTERCATION

I was at the bus station waiting for the bus, a man came and sat next to this lady and tried to steal her purse! literally in front of the whole bus station and with the ticket lady nearby and while the purse was still across her body

I think they knew each other because they'd been fighting under their breaths with each other

Well they left, she came back after a few minutes The guy comes back proceeding to pace around the bus station talking about something having to do with her or her money or something (OUT LOUD like he's trying to plead his case to a jury or something!)

If I could, at the drop of a pin I'd move back out to the country I grew up in a small town where there was no crime, everyone knew everyone and your neighbors would give you the shirt off their backs for you

Like, my mom's ex was blind and every time it snowed our neighbors a few miles away would come with their tractor or whatever and shovel the snow out of our driveway

The neighbors near where my dad lived made me a shirt with a horse on it (my favorite animal) with my name underneath, just cause 🤷‍♀️

Kids could play wherever they wanted and you knew they were safe, and if you were worried sometimes the neighbors had an idea where you might be (they'd look out for us too)

Never had to worry about your bag or purse or wallet being stolen if you accidentally left it somewhere

I'm telling you! Small towns are where it's at!

Crime weirdos and freaks run rampant where I live now

But "Try that in a small town!

[downfallofi]

chipotle order?

mythical creature you think/believe is real?

anything from your childhood you’ve held on to?

first thing you’re doing in the purge?

thoughts on mint chocolate chip?

a number that weirds you out?

would you say you have good taste in music?

how’s your spice tolerance?

what’s your favorite or go-to outfit?

last meal on earth?

and btw i asked all these in jonathan frakes's voice lol ty!! <3

-I generally like chicken, white rice, black beans, pico de gallo, either tomatillo salsa or the burny red salsa if I'm feeling especially masochistic, and roasted corn 🥹🥹 with a side of queso.

-Answered!!

- Kinda held on to the traumas associated with my childhood, but as far as possessions.... I do still have my first model Game Boy Advance from 2001? Is that - does that count

- Yeah, I don't understand people that jump right into wanting to murder, torture or r*pe in a purge scenario, I would be stealing food and supplies to pass out to the homeless.

- Not my favorite ice cream, but I mean I like it alright.

- I can't... think of any specific numbers that weird me out because like... who does have a number that they see and say absolutely NOT, fuck that number, skipping it.

- I like to think so, while Im also aware that my music tastes kind of froze and I didnt like any new music and listened to much the same things from 2012-2022, and I sometimes got into a grumpy old man space of like blehhhh all the music on the radio sounds like SHIT, and literally could be just fine listening to emo and nu metal from 2004. My nieces/niblings also... fuckin roast me a lot for listening to "old man music" and "dad rock" so like. I do enjoy it and like what I like, but I've been branching out and listening to new playlists and newer material lately. That said, 2000's family values tour energy nu metal still rules.

- I like to think I have a good spice tolerance. More spicy tolerance than I grew up having, certainly, where my father only seasoned things with pepper or Tabasco. But still sometimes a few spoons of spicy pickle with my curry is enough to knock me on my ass. 🥹

-Im wearing my go-to outfit, a faded black Bullet Club t-shirt and basketball shorts. Bury me in this fucking shirt tbh.

- It'd have to be a good breakfast meal, biscuits and gravy because Im southern as hell and eggs maybe. 🥹🥹

[leffee]

Alright I feel like I gotta step up my game so here go!

- pepper sometimes steals the boys shirts because they are very comfortable and similar to the boyish style she likes to rock from time to time

- minka has a habit of wandering off so the girls got her a child leash so whenever they go someplace she’ll most likely get lost/separated from them for her safety she’s leashed (they play rock paper scissors to decide who’s in charge of her at the time)

- speaking of wandering vinnie has trouble with that also especially because he’s also easily distracted but Russell didn’t want to do what was done to minka out of embarrassment so he came up with a better solution holding vinnie’s hand.why does this work you may ask? Because once he does vinnie won’t be the one to let go first or ever he loves the attention to much especially since it’s a way to show off that he’s in a relationship in public places

- Zoe simply cannot leave the house without makeup on she feels naked without it everyone has tried to convince her that she’s naturally very pretty but she won’t buy it m. the only one who’s seen her bare face is pepper and she misses that Zoe alot

- Sunil is not a morning mongoose he hates being up early and loves his sleep everyone knows not to (wake the bear so to speak) because of you do you get who pepper calls mr. Cranky all day long ( give him coffee and you get mr. Tolerable lol

- Russell once a year takes his dad to go visit his friends who for a week host a get together in rotation to hang and catch up the dads have fun while the sons babysit them his dad looks forward to it every year and Russell does his best to make him happy because he himself finds it hard to be there for his dad like he should and the guilt from that is something he’s working on fixing

- pennyling tells stories at the library since she’s so good at them she loves it so much and has become a favorite of the children parents often try to hire her for parties and get togethers but she often politely declines because it would put to much on her plate

- minka collects alot of random things she’s gets a little fixated on a thing for a while either because she likes it or thinks she can make art out of it somehow.so she now has alot of random things in general with her for that reason (including her friends fur) “it’s not weird it’s art!” - Minka

- (Touching from the other post) yes vinnie absolutely loves Russell’s body it took him a bit to actually be comfortable with vinnie seeing him in such a vulnerable state but vinnie was very patient and told him he didn’t care how long it took for Russell to do anything in their relationship he was just happy to have someone to give all his love to in fact every chance he gets a hug here, a hug there! here’s vinnie! hugging him ( vinnies used to the quills part at this point)

- sunil speaks Hindi to his parents and Sharukuh but still feels rusty doing it at all he even tried to practice but I tried to get his parents to speak more English for him - side note I do think vinnie can speak Italian because of his mom he just doesn’t use it that often anymore-

- speaking of psycho vinnie he throws an absolute fit if Russell or Sunil have to leave him for a long period of time for any reason crying, screaming, kicking, punching, begging, clinging on for dear life for them to stay he’ll do ANYTHING he can think of ✨side story✨ one time Sunil had a small surgery and vinnie waited for him with so much anxiety when the nurse said that Sunil was able to have visitors vinnie saw his chance and wouldn’t leave him once he made it in the room. He hates hospitals and didn’t like that Sunil was in one. he had to be dragged out kicking and screaming trying to get back in the building. (He did try a few more times to go back but was not successful)

- penny has a hard time seeing leftovers in the fridge because she doesn’t Believe in wasting good food.she is always tempted by them and gets anxious when she sees that they never end up getting eaten.

- sharukuh is super over protective over Sunil he’s also super into cars and learning how to fix them and collecting the ones he thinks are cool. he’s also likes to call vinnie “little buddy”no one knows how it started but vinnie now answers to it. vinnie kinda looks up to him a bit because he does a lot of manly things vinnie wants to learn so naturally

Ok that’s what I have for now I could’ve kept going but it feels so long now haha I hope you like them! Just to clarify I do see them as animals but more ones that act human kinda like in zootopia but they still look like themselves from the show if that makes sense

Other side note sharukuh is not bad to me he does have his own story but he’s not stuck up like in the show he actually met Sunil in college and has been in the group. since him and Sunil do also get together on some of my stories because it’s cute what they have atleast the way I like to see it

Ohh, a big, big number of headcanons is what Leffee likes! And since there's so much delight here to unpack let's start without further ado. And yes, I do have my handy dandy ice coffee with me.

okay, this one is honestly just precious. Can we all just agree that male clothes are more comfortable? Yeah? Good. Plus, it does align with how I imagine Pepper choosing clothes, so yes, basically comfortable T-shirts. I'd imagine she likes Vinnie's the most because they are super stupid, with stupid texts and images and she loves it

look, I- just... *laughs like a dolphin*. So true! She would, wouldn't she? She's on a freaking leash. I honestly don't think she would mind, the not wandering part she would, but not the being on a leash part. Though she would probably be able to escape as soon as whoever is holding that leash is distracted for at least a moment

yup, Vinnie does have a tendency to get lost, doesn't he? I agree. But omg, that solution is just the cutest thing ever! He would see something and start heading into another direction but Russell sees it in time and just quickly catches his hand, like "no". And once he does Vinnie immediately forgets about whatever he was distracted by because he's just this fixated on Russell holding his hand, ep! In fact, his tail starts wagging. Shush, I want a reptile to be able to wag his tail like a dog, is that so wrong ;-;

this is just... yeah, she would feel like it. That also, ironically, humanizes her a bit. Her tendency to care so much about looks I mean. Just adds that extra depth to Zoe. And yes, I absolutely agree that everyone has genuinely tried to convince her that she looks just as great without it. Perhaps Pepper at first was rather teasy about it but seeing how much Zoe actually cares about it she changed her tone completely and was like, "No, Zoe, I really mean it. I'm not kidding this time." On a kinda side note, I do think that at least once the boys had a conversation that went somewhat like this "You know, I sometimes wonder why our girls even wear makeup." "Yeah! I guess they look different wearing it but they look so good without it too." "True, they are all so pretty." In short: they love them and genuinely find them all so pretty. Please, give me that

yeah, I think the "It's a happy, happy, happy world" implanted that headcanon in all of our minds, didn't it? It did in mine at least. Not only that, but I imagine he just needs a lot of sleep to function normally. He's not a morning person (or a mangoose) and neither is he the night owl. He sleep all night long or suffers. And yes, he needs his coffee, I personally see him drinking literally the most bitter shit possible. Not because he likes it all that much, but because it's the only kind of coffee that wakes him up when he's up too early

oh please, this is just too precious. I just find Jerry so endearing, you have no idea how much this headcanon means to me. Also I imagine that Russell's friends just simply adore him as well (I mean, it was kinda shown in the episode so I'm not pulling that out of my ass entirely). In short: yes, great headcanon. I have a feeling I had something else to say here but I can't remember now :[

okay this just such a natural progression of Penny's story telling prowess, I'm genuinely surprised I never thought of that. Yes, she absolutely does. She could earn money from that, just saying ;)

okay, yes. As a person who loves having others' items even if they aren't in general anything extraordinary I so understand her. For example, I have this part of a pen of one of my classmates' from highschool and I take it everywhere. It's like my lucky charm or sth. Yes, she definitely has her friends' fur (and scales), tbh I do think they would be fairly easy to incorporate into art. Then again, I do think she's that kind of monkey who would never actually end up using those and just store these items until the end of time. I don't blame her. That way she can have her friends with her wherever she goes :)

yes, exactly, this boy is so full of love. Listen, he might not be a genius but when it comes to his friends, and especially when it really matters, he will do anything for them. Especially for his love interest that is Russell. It doesn't matter to him how Russell looks, it wouldn't matter if he suddenly lost or gained 20 kilograms (44 pounds), lost a limb or had 3rd degree burns, what matters is that it is Russell's body. I don't always make him unhealthily obsessive but in my mind he's always at least a bit obsessed over others, though to a more healthy degree. And about the quills part, I can't help but combine it with my headcanon that due to his constant falling and tripping his pain tolerance is above average, and with getting used to those quills? He's basically physically invulnerable

ok, not much to add here from me, I'll talk about Sharukh more later but for now let's just say I'm happy he's not an asshole in your version :>. But Vinnie? Yup, that sounds good. Did you take that italian part from my rambles? Anyway, yes. The thing is, I imagine his mother (yes, he calls her mother) knew at least a bit of English. He and his sister on the other hand were still very young when arriving to America so they learned the language much easier. With Vinnie being younger he assimilated it so easily in fact he's pretty much bilingual. But due to italian being his native tongue he still finds it a bit more natural. That's also the reason why he sometimes messes up words in English, especially if they sound similar. In short: they all learned it and since they live in mostly english-speaking country now they rarely use Italian anyway. But it does rub Vinnie the wrong way when he does. He can, he just won't. But sometimes when he forgets words in English he will stop for a second, recall the word he needs in Italian, translate it to English and then he can continue, like this: "Man, I could really drink some... uh..." "It's latte in Italian. And latte means..." "...milk!" Sorry, I always end up writing more about him than anything else, I don't even know Italian!

ah yes, Vinnie but he's fucking unhinged... so I guess just the regular Vinnie. Nah, I'm just kidding :3, anyway, yes yes and once again YES! He's best at his worst, I tell ya. It's so cool too, because anything else he can be or appear so chill abou. There's a fire nearby? Meh. He broke his arm? Happened before will happen again. But one of his friends leaving him or being in any sort of danger whether real or imaginery? He falls apart. He won't even try to stop the tears or any other reactions because they are just too strong, he couldn't if he tried. He'll cry, beg, rip his hair out, you said it all. And if everything else fails he'll just cling to that person. And that side story is just perfect. Small surgery? Sure, yeah, it's still a damn surgery in a damn hospital. He's going to panic and he's going to panic hard. He might as well be more stressed than Sunil at this point. He doesn't sleep, he just paces around and due to stress is so impulsive he won't stop at anthing. He has that feral energy, as you said, he kicks and screams, plus all that frustration combined with adrenaline just gives him extra strenght that seems impossible in his puny body and yet. That's sheer determination, desperation and instability. I mean, we've seen him when Sunil wasn't in the daycare for just one day, he ripped that thing to shreds. Two times actually. What do you think he'd do in any sort of similar situation but one that would go on longer? He's my little destruction and I love him

she's just like me fr fr. Well, kinda. But that feeling of anxiety by seeing leftover food? Now that's another good trait for a character that makes them seem more deep and that's always good

now this the moment when I talk about Sharukh more. It's so cool to see him being nice and mingling with our beloved seven pets/humans or whatever else. Him being overprotective over Sunil is actually so wholesome to see, you know, especially after how we see him act in his episode and that whole bunch of headcanons back in the day that made Sharukh Sunil's brother and made him basically bully Sunil. That was genuinely disheartening and made me really dislike this headcanon.

(tumblr was giving me some weird errors about word limit in one block so that's why there's this weird break here, I will continue directly from where I ended in a new block then)

[...] But as always I fixate on the Vinnie part. Him calling Vinnie "little buddy" is so fucking cute, it was a long time coming for someone to call him that, am I right? He's so- he's so little nnngh *cries*. But come on, that is just precious. I just imagine the whole group gathering somewhere one day and as soon as Sharukh comes he's like "Hi guys, and hello to you, little buddy." Just juust aaaaa *cries again*. See, Sharukh can be nice and even manly! I like him like that. AND Vinnie looking up to him (literally pfpfpf)? Great, just great headcanon overall

Ahh, that was satisfying, but then again when talking about lps isn't? Yeah lmao, I would love to have even more too but I guess that is enough for one post (I mean, it literally told me I reached some word limit). Not enough in general though :D. I'm always up to see more of your thoughts or headcanons, please, you have no idea how happy they make me, I really want to see more. I won't force you to do anything, but also please, please when you're in the mood and have time and want to, send more, they make me so happy. I don't care how long or short the ask is, I want as much as possible.

Alright, that's an actually interesting take, especially since based on all those human-like actions I thought you were talking about them as if they were humans. Nothing wrong with seeing them still as pets just more human-like! In fact, one of the reasons why I primaly imagine them as people is because they can do more like this, but the way you describe it allows that too so I can't complain. Yes, yes it does make sense, don't worry.

I have already talked about Sharukh but as finishing thoughts I'll add this: as long as he's not an asshole I'm happy to see him too. Plus, he calls Vinnie "little buddy", you have already won me over with that because that is just so cute. Not to mention that it also balances the girls-boys ratio. And he's tall! How could you not like him like that! Maybe I do want to kiss him.

[baekura]

1, 7, 12, 25, and 32 for the ask meme? :D

1. What are three shows in your watchlist that you’ve been meaning to get to?

I Think You Should Leave, Yugioh Arc V, and I need to finish Spy x Family/watch the second season

7. What color dominates your closet?

Black lol. I don't really wear a lot of t-shirts anymore because I have to wear business casual for work, but they still make up most of my wardrobe. My socks and shoes are all black too.

12. What’s something about your best friend that you love?

Kinda stealing your answer lol, but I have a few people I consider my best friends and their passion for the things they love and their kindness are beautiful qualities about them <3

25. Do you have any piercings or tattoos? Are there any that you want?

I used to have my ears pierced when I was a kid, but the holes have since closed. I do have one tattoo of a semicolon on my right wrist so it's easy for me to see. I do someday want to get a tattoo on my forearm inspired by Nathan Zed's Good Enough merchandise line from a few years ago

32. If you could dye your hair any color, regardless of how you think it would look, what color would you choose?

I'm hoping to dye my hair white/silverish sometime soon! I used to dye my hair a lot in college, and I miss that part of my self expression that helped make me look visibly queer. I wear khakis and dad sweaters (don't get me wrong I love a good dad sweater) or polos everyday, so I don't really feel like who I am is expressed through my physical appearance these days. Maybe I'd like to do purple again someday, too, but right now, my heart is set on silvery-white!

[roostersmustache]

The Hard Deck IV. (Sneak Peek)

Pairing: Rooster x O.C. Bisexual Female Character

Author's Note: I started this one early because all of the love I've been getting for 'The Hard Deck' has really fueled my desire to write again! So thank you to everyone who reads and enjoys, it truly means a lot <3. I'm writing this chapter with acrylics on so if there are errors, that is why and let me know. This isn't the first or last installment of this fic! Make sure you check out the first three parts! Also, some of the dialogue of the movie might be off! Sorry I tried my best!!

Synopsis: In which Charley really can't stop thinking about Bradley 'Rooster' Bradshaw after seeing him play dogfight football on the beach.

Warnings: Mentions of an age gap, swearing, sexual tension, SMUT 18+ Minors DNI!, mentions of an abusive relationship, possible TGM spoilers, and really sexy aviators shirtless on the beach playing football.

Word Count: 8.5k (I got wayyyy carried away lol)

Masterlist

Part One Part Two Part Three

Currently Bradley was chasing her around the beach because she had playfully taken the sunglasses he had worn just to spite him. She was laughing and he was yelling after her. She didn't win, however, because next thing she knows Bradley is picking her up and throwing her over his shoulder. She shrieked at him and began hitting his back.

"Bradley I swear to god put me down," she said.

"Unfortunately, I cannot do that," he said. "Those guilty of stealing must be thrown overboard."

"Very funny, Bradshaw. Now put me down."

He just ignored her and continued walking towards the ocean.

"Bradley please don't throw me in the water. Bradley. Bradley. Bradley!"

But it was no use because next thing she knew she was being thrown into the ocean. She came up sputtering and coughing up water, a glare on her face as she gazed at the pilot who was laughing at her.

"That was not funny," she said, walking up to him.

"Now I'm all wet. And my hair is wet. And I hate when my hair is wet."

"What do you do when you shower then?" He asked, still laughing.

"That's completely different."

"So," He said, looking down at her. "Where do you want to go eat?"

"You really think I want to go out with you after that?"

"I do," he said, shrugging.

"I can't even put my clothes on anymore because they'll just get wet."

"Sounds rough," he said, smirking at her. She just groaned before trying to lunge at him herself, but it didn't do anything. He just laughed as her hands hit his chest, trying to push him. It didn't work. Charley grunted in defeat.

"Fine, Bradshaw," she said, crossing her arms. "Yes, I still want to go out with you. I just genuinely don't have clothes to wear anymore because of the stunt you just pulled. I have my shorts, that's about it."

"What about your cute little white top thing?" He asked.

"Yeah that things drenched because my dad mistook it for his towel earlier." Rooster laughed.

"That's okay, baby. I have a shirt you can borrow in the car."

"That's not very appropriate for a dinner date is it not?"

"Charley when I said I wanted to take you out to dinner, I meant I want to take you to my favorite place in this town. I grew up going there, they have the best burgers, and believe me, they don't care what you wear."

"Honestly that sounds better than some five star high class restaurant anyways."

"See? That's what I'm saying. Don't get confused though, I will be taking you to a nice fancy dinner one of these days, but not tonight."

"Lead the way then, Lieutenant."

~~

The Hard Deck IV. Coming Monday, July 18th at 12:00pm EST Time