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leam1983 · 3 years

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On Grief

This is a long one. You're under no obligation to push further if you don't want to. It's a personal post, so I'll more than understand if this isn't to your tastes. The normally-scheduled pedantry, commentary and memes will resume shortly.

One of my relatives was diagnosed with ALS. What started as an odd case of palsy in her left set of vocal cords that could've been far more benign was just confirmed by her referred physician. It's Lou Gherig's, and with her age and current condition, her prognosis is of three to five years, tops. Sure, Stephen Hawking blew his own prognosis out of the water, but a combination of notoriety and luck enabled him to eke out as much existence as medical tech could've possibly allowed.

We knew things were suspect when my aunt, a marathoner with a monthly sub to Runner's World, stopped running. Her food intake dropped like a stone, and she soon took to increasingly simple painting and drawing styles. At first we thought it was just her wanting to explore simpler rendering techniques, but then...

Then we noticed the twitching. How awkwardly her pens and brushes were set in her hands. She was in great shape and didn't mind living in the ass-end of Sutton, basically in the open country and with a path leading up to her front door that was all in rough cobblestones. She broke a hip against them, last year.

Her speech started to slur, lately. Her last bike trip also landed her in the ER. She doesn't bike anymore. She doesn't run, and being a gourmand by nature, feels obligated to restrain herself, for fear of gaining weight. She's aggressively vegan. Not towards others, but towards herself. No meat, no eggs, nothing. Most of us ovo-lactos and omnivores in the family know her constant snacking meant her seventy-plus body is desperate for energy.

From the look of things, it feels like the diagnosis broke through her bullshit reasoning for being vegan. She wasn't vegan for the sake of limiting her carbon footprint or making more responsible choices at the grocery store, but because she, as a lifelong anorexic, thought she was ugly and needed to lose weight. That's been a constant with her. Age catches up and skin sags? She mistakes it for a love handle, cuts out virtually all sources of protein and carbs safe for tofu, seitan and bean-based preps. Of course, like a lot of anorexics, she'd have bulemic episodes. I used to sleep over at her last bachelor pad, as a teen, and I remember her pantry was loaded up for bear with Danish cookie tins, Nutella jars and whipped cream. I remember she invited me over specifically when she intended to cheat. Then it was back to yoga, pot-smoking, meditation and shopping runs - and she probably kept her purging for when I was gone.

So yeah. I'm betting Belgian Asshole (see one of my previous posts) convinced her to break her vows and went looking for a "slice of authentic Tikka Masala", to quote his email. The entire family is made up of ethnic food diehards, so we spam-flooded his inbox with recommendations. Looks like she'll be eating meat again, soon. Her own email mentioned concerns of strength and stamina, so I get it.

Otherwise? We're gobsmacked. Imagine spending an entire weekday both at work and off work, aggressively goofing off because you're trying as hard as you can not to think of your favourite aunt's mention of assisted suicide as an option.

Three to five years. Maybe one, or two good Christmases. After that, her condition should probably have started to deteriorate quickly.

I'm not close with a ton of my own family. I love them all, but it's more a sense of polite respect than anything involving solid bonds. The only two folks I know I'll be devastated for when they'll die are her, and my youngest cousin on the other side of the family.

I'm mostly okay now. No doubts, no crisis of unbelief, no anger, no rage... But then I'll see her in a more diminished state, one of those days. How am I going to take to it?

Part of me keeps a tally of the deaths in the family. First, it was my uncle on my mother's side. Ruptured abdominal artery, with a leak small enough to pool into the gut's cavity for months. Decay settled in, guy got anesthetized for an intervention...

They didn't even bother sewing him back up.

Second one was my other paternal aunt's new husband. First one was great, but left the country in the seventies to go live in Stockholm with his medical assistant. Second one was a geologist and physicist at the same campus she taught as. French guy, the son of innkeepers four generations down. It showed, too. Our Christmas tables haven't been the same since he left us his recipie books, all his corny jokes on provincial eating habits, and his obstinate focus on turning every 25th of December into a Roman orgy probably befitting of the old Saturnalia traditions. I mean, when's the last time you've had an eight-course meal, outside of Thanksgiving?

Tumors in his mesenteric artery lined the blood vessel's inner walls, deposited virtually everywhere in his body. He was diagnosed in June and dead by August. He'd always been the lanky type, bone-thin even if he hoovered food like he'd never have enough. He looked even thinner in his hospital bed.

Then, my maternal grandpa bit it. Decades of casual alcoholism, cirrhosis more or less jumping on him around his seventy-sixth year. He looked a bit like John Keston, the actor who played Gehn in CyanWorlds' Riven. Same hairline, same hawkish nose, same eyes - just more Cajun and less New England-esque. I don't know if it was youth or stupidity or - anything, really, but I dropped by to see him, just two days before he died. I didn't realize he was tallying my life, asking me if I had everything in order, if things were planned.

Now, I understand.

Next one on the chopping block is Aunt Doris, still on Mom's side. She of the serial mooching, she of the concept of not needing much to get by if you were the cute one of the family. She was pretty enough in her prime, sure - if by pretty you meant "cigarette-butt blonde with a discount Farah Fawcett blow-up and an unfinished High School degree". First husband was an abusive ass who gave her an uncommonly sensitive son, second one figured she'd stick to the minimum-wage circuit while he tore out rotator cuffs or busted his C7 while on his outboard like clockwork. By the end, she roped my grandmother into living with her, spent her days sloppy-drunk and died on her ratty couch while falling asleep and choking on her own vomit.

Before them all, the youngest of my uncles died at age two. Cancer. Never knew which one, was told it didn't matter. You didn't survive much of anything cancerous, back in the late fifties.

Ping-pong this back to three years ago, and my oldest paternal uncle dies. Paul, who smoked like a chimney for most of his life and successfully stopped after discovering Champix. He got to live five great years as the high-IQ oddball he'd always been, smoke-free. Paul was the weird bird in the family, the type to remember a really engrossing story at two in the morning and making a note to call you up first thing in the morning to share it. He always had a project of some sort to work on, like a simulated investors' tank for young entrepreneurs looking to learn the ropes, or a Byzantine arrangement of coaxials allowing four of his lakeside neighbours to pirate his cable sub. He'd invite us over for dinner, gather all the ingredients we'd need for whatever it was he wanted to treat us to - and then he'd let us cook it - just sitting by the sidelines, chatting away.

He was also a bit of a narcoleptic, and looked a bit like William Howard Taft if you'd worked him out of these old sack suits and into modern shirts and suspenders. He fell asleep practically everywhere, with his more wakeful environments being his workshop and his property's dock. He took me out fishing, once, and knew what the entire family expected.

"Oars're here, Gremlin, fish're that way. Wake me up when you've got a bite."

At this point, it wasn't even a point of concern; it was just an Uncle Paul Thing, the exact thing you'd have expected out of this kind, eccentric blob of a man whose idea of fishing involved pushing his hat over his eyes and basically all but ensuring that his roaring snores would scare prey away. He'd been a supposedly high-IQ type, terminally bored with almost everything, only really getting agitated and interested back when I asked him for help for my Junior High Computer class's Javascript calculator. Once the syntax hit something familiar and he realized that JS has some similarities with FORTRAN, he was on a roll, acting like someone had snuck a Red Bull in his coffee.

Well, fibrosis caught up with him. His last hours were spent directing us on how to cook what would've been his last meal. I think he really just wanted to know we were alright, that we still could exchange laughs around the kitchen counter. He clocked out the way he always did, except he had an oxygen tube running under his nose. His head bobbed down, he snored loudly for a few minutes, then turned increasingly quiet...

And that was it.

And now there's Isabelle. The marathoner, my partner-in-crime when it comes to professing to have a healthy diet while occasionally cheating in glorious, weekend-defining means, my gateway to cannabis and also the first person who took my cringy self-insert fanfic fodder and went No, that's worth it! Push it, develop that universe of yours!

I wouldn't be almost two-thirds of the way through my first decent manuscript, if not for her, and I wouldn't be shopping for publishers with the same energy you'd reserve for weekend-grade Facebook putzing-about. I owe her part of my self-acceptance, and part of my discovery of what defines my routine to this day. Isabelle was my first meditation coach.

And in three to five years, she might be gone.

I just thought grief might be... noisier, is all. Louder. Right now, it's just germane to confusion, and it's sitting there. There's a pinch of fear in it, too. My parents are in their mid-sixties. How long do I have left with them?!

And the family and I just covered that up with jokes and, well, cooking. I've been told I'd make a half-decent therapist but - navigating your own emotions is hard work...

I don't know. I guess I needed to put this down somewhere.

#personal life #tw: cancer mention #tw: alcoholism mention #tw: death mentions #grief #coping

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writtenonreceipts · 4 years

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Meant to post this a long time ago...found it tucked away in my folders from YEARS ago...a Jily fic that I had too much fun writing even though its kinda terrible...

Third Year-Early October

At one o’clock in the morning Lily Evans’ eyes snapped open and refused to droop shut. She moaned and flopped onto her side. Of all the things that annoyed her most in the world being awake at unholy hours of the morning was at the top of the list.

Changing positions again she listened to the heavy breathing of Mary McDonald on the right, Marlene McKinnon’s rather loud snores to the left, and Dorcas Meadows dead center. Poor Mary was trying to battle a cold and she was losing. And Marlene’s nasal passages would never be the same since Sirius Black “accidentally” wacked her with a bludger bat at the start of the year. Dorcas insisted on continuing a practice of deep breathing exercises as it would help with remains in a deep slumber all night. Alice Fortescue was the only one who was quiet in her sleeping habits. Besides the occasional round of sleep walking. They once awoke to her trying to crawl into bed with Mary insisting it was essential to “snuggle.”

Unexpectedly, Lily’s stomach gave a small groan. She tried to ignore it knowing for a fact that an entire basket of rolls disappeared at dinner because of her lack of self-control. In her defense, however, the spiced apple butter was divine that evening. There was no way she could be hungry. It was just a protest of the awful subjection she had put her body through; it had to be.

Flopping onto her belly, Lily tried to get comfortable. Usually, she had no trouble with falling asleep. Her bed was always the perfect balance of firmness to squishiness. Keeping her eyes closed she attempted to use Marlene’s snores as a sort of white noise to lull back to sleep with.

Her stomach growled again.

This was ridiculous.

Shoving off her blankets, Lily eased out of bed, her feet hurriedly finding her slippers so they wouldn’t have to touch the cold floor. Holy hippogryphs the room was freezing. Groping around at the foot of her bed for her robe, Lily pulled it on and crept to the door. Making sure her wand was tucked in her pocket, she glanced back at her roommates to make sure she hadn’t disturbed them. After less than a minute, their usual sleep noises commenced unaltered. Alice muttered something about her love of toads, but that was normal.

Slipping down the stairs to the Common Room, Lily hoped there were no other students still awake. Thankfully as she descended the stairs she could hear nothing but the usual night sounds of the castle. Outside the wind bristled sharply. It seemed to mold with the castle as it blew but that didn’t stop it from pounding against Gryffindor Tower.

Shivering unconsciously, Lily pulled her robe tighter around her slender frame. The movement caused her hair flopped in her face. Scowling to herself for not grabbing a tie for her hair she entered the Common Room. It was always a bit eerie to see it so empty. Only a few torches were lit, just enough that she could see a few lone books were scattered here and there, an abandoned sock, a quill. Just the usual. Amazingly enough Gryffindor’s were somewhat neat. Though she couldn’t see what was stuffed between cushions or stacked on the back tables by the windows.

Settling down on the armchair closest to the fireplace Lily sighed and breathed in the lingering scent of smoke. The other students must have called it an early night, there wasn’t a bit of heat coming from the fireplace. Sighing, Lily snuggled into the chair and thought of home. They had a fireplace. A real one. Dad would have to go out and buy wood off someone so they’d have enough when it got cold in the winter. Once they went out as a family to cut down firewood. That was before Hogwarts. Before Lily was different. Her chest constricted painfully in thinking back. She missed those days. It was when Petunia still called her a friend and gave her presents for silly reasons. Now . . .

The thought came with such suddenness that her heart beat painfully in her chest. Usually she could keep these thoughts at bay. Sure, she missed home, but she couldn’t stand lingering on the emptiness that it made her feel, so, instead she pushed those thoughts away. It was getting easier now. Petunia had recently learned the art of swearing. And swearing methodically so Mum and Dad didn’t get mad at her. It was fine, Lily justified. Petunia was just stubborn.

Her stomach grumbled again.

“Oh for Agrippa’s sake,” she said under her breath. Sure, she was a thirteen-year-old witch that was having a growth spurt, but being this hungry this early in the morning was ridiculous. Glancing around the room she tried to locate a stray candy or maybe someone had left their bag with a snack inside. No such luck.

She could find the Kitchens. Lily could feel her eyes widen at her own thought.

But it’s after curfew.

You don’t even know where the Kitchens are.

And it’s really dark in the castle. What are you? Five?

Having almost made up her mind to just die of starvation up in her bed a loud scrape caused her to jump. Pulling her knees into her chest, Lily glanced around. You are fine. Calm down. There’s probably a bat outside or something. Something scuffled noisily. That was definitely from inside the tower. Perking up Lily did her best to hone in on the sound. Her stomach rumbled again. Quickly the patter of feet ran down the stairs from the boys’ dorms. Peaking over the top of the chair Lily couldn’t help the audible groan escape her lips.

“Potter.”

Yelping in surprise the boy with unruly hair and crooked glasses locked eyes with her.

“Evans?” He whispered loudly.

“No, it’s McGonagall,” Lily snapped, a scowl seemed permanently forced on her face whenever she was around him. But, curiosity couldn’t keep her at bay as to why he was awake. Sitting up on her knees to face him, Lily crossed her arms. “What are you doing?”

“I could ask you the same thing,” he responded. He crossed his own arms and glared at her with the same malice she was sure was in her own eyes. The torch just by the stairwell reflected sharply off his glasses, but Lily could catch a small smirk playing on the edge of his lips.

Sighing Lily pulled on an ear lobe. “I couldn’t sleep.”

“Me neither,” he said. His pajamas were mismatched and too small. She caught the pattern of a Quidditch player across his chest and snitches splattered everywhere else charmed to fly around. There was a little skin exposed between the edge of the shirt and the bottoms, which hung at least two inches above his ankles.

They were quiet for a few moments until James cleared his throat. “Sorry about turning your hair blue.”

Lily’s scowl returned. “If you were sorry you wouldn’t even have been aiming your wand at my head in the first place.”

“Accident,” James sputtered, Lily could see color springing up on his cheeks. “I was aiming for Sirius.”

“I don’t believe you.”

“Ah well,” the boy replied, his cheeky arrogance returning as though it had never left. He took a few steps toward the Portrait Hole. “I gotta go find chocolate for Remus.”

“Didn’t he go home for the weekend?” Lily asked scrunching her nose. She could have sworn she saw Professor McGonagall escorting him from the Common Room earlier that afternoon.

“It’s for when he gets back, obviously,” James rolled his eyes. His glasses slipped down his nose

Harrumphing, Lily climbed off the chair and walked over to her classmate. He’d gotten taller over the summer and throughout the start of term. Most of his robes hung at least two inches above his ankles, just like his pajamas. He easily stood a head over her. She did not like this new development.

“Where do you plan on finding said chocolate?” She asked trying not to sound hesitant. She couldn’t believe that she was going to him for help with her hunger issue. “There’s none left sitting out, I-I checked.”

He let out a laugh, mirthful and amused. “Wanting to snatch from other’s things there Evans? For shame. But, as fun as that would be, there is a lovely place called The Kitchens that would have everything a hungry stomach could want.”

“Who said I was hungry?” She almost shrieked. But just then (of course it was then) her stomach let loose another growl that could have given a dragon a run for its money.

Grinning James gestured to the Portrait hole. “After you my fine red-headed accomplice.”

“It’s after curfew,” she reminded him, ignoring the fact that barely ten minutes ago she was about to head out into the castle herself.

James shrugged. “All the more fun.” His dark eyes glinted at the prospect.

Don’t do it, a voice that sounded a lot like Mary said in the back of her head.

If it means chocolate, Marlene’s rational butted in. Plus Potter is decently fit. Even with that bare bit of skin you saw, no fat there. Shut up Marlene. Although technically that was Lily’s own consciousness.

“Bah,” she said aloud and tossed her hands up. “Fine. But if we get caught, I have a wild imagination and I will pin everything on you.”

“That’s the Marauder spirit,” James grinned a hand running through his hair.

“No.”

“What?”

“Don’t you dare call me a Marauder, or your accomplice, or fine for that matter.”

Pouting James made a pleading motion. “Just for tonight, our little secret.”

“No.” She said again. “I will change my mind about coming with you.”

Her stomach did not agree with that announcement.

“You’re going to wake up half the castle unless you eat, Merlin, Evans,” he grinned cheekily.

Pulling her wand on him, Lily glared him down. “I will use this.”

He pushed his glasses up his nose and gestured for the Portrait. “C’mon, or else Sirius will get up, see I’m gone, and try to come with us. Than we really will get caught.”

Pulling at her bathrobe Lily gave a look over her shoulder back at the staircase that led up to her nice warm bed. Another feeling of doubt came over her. James made an annoyed sound and practically stomped his foot. He would never let her forget if she didn’t go with him. Tying her robe closed (oh Merlin it was her ratty old one with singes all over it after a mishap last summer involving Petunia, muggle garden gnomes, sparklers, and an innocent by standing cat). With as much dignity as she could muster, Lily marched in front of James and out of the Common Room.

It was strange seeing the corridor like this; void of students milling about and very few torches to light the way. Lily felt a bit of awe at this new perspective of the castle. When the Fat Lady swung shut behind her Lily turned to face Potter. He had a look of expectancy about him. That or he’d just realized he needed to use the loo.

“Well?” Lily asked crossing her arms.

“Well, what?” James scrunched his nose confused.

“The Kitchens!” Lily hissed. It took all her effort not to scream at him.

His eyes widened and he bobbed his head a few times. Lily started a list in her head of how she could kill him, or get him expelled. “Ah, yes. Evans, I don’t know how to tell you this, but I lied to you about knowing where the Kitchens are.”

She stared at him blankly. He scratched his nose. Pursing her lips, Lily got to number ten on her list (less than a minute, that had to be a record). It was especially special seeing as it would both kill him and get him expelled. Alas, she had no way of getting a chainsaw into Hogwarts.

They stayed like that for a few moments longer until Lily punched his shoulder as hard as she could. He squawked in surprise leaping to the side.

“Careful Potter or you’ll wake up the whole castle,” she mimicked looking up to the Fat Lady…who was noticeably absent from her portrait. For the love of Gryffindor.

“Oh dear, that’s terribly awkward,” James said mildly. He didn’t sound the least bit concerned about the predicament, nor very keen to find a solution.

Trembling with a mix of rage and annoyance Lily rounded on him. She felt like she could burst into tears at his stupidity. Never mind hers. It was his fault. He had dragged her into this. “Fix it.”

“Unfortunately there’s not much to do,” James shrugged. He pulled his wand from his pajamas pocket and cast Lumos. “May as well explore, shan’t we?”

Shaking her head quickly, and rather violently, Lily’s hands balled into fists. “I am not going anywhere with you, you, you pigheaded toerag!”

Her goads only caused a grin to spread across his face. In the light of his wand the expression was frightening; in the sense that it looked impish and overly pleased at the situation. Before he could say anything, a noise sounded down the corridor and the undeniable yowl of a cat.

“Please tell me that was Elvendork,” James said frantically waving his wand around.

“Who in the world is Elvendork?” Lily asked as she tried prying on the Portrait Hole praying to whoever would listen that it would open.

“Your cat.”

“My cat’s name is not Elvendork. Besides that’s a name for a male cat, mine’s a girl.”

“Elvendork is a perfectly unisex name.”

“Potter.”

“C’mon, if that was Mrs. Norris, Filch’ll be just behind her.” Without waiting for a response, James grabbed Lily’s hand and pulled down the corridor and through a hallway she wasn’t familiar with.

Losing track of the turns and stairwells they took, Lily felt as though her lungs would explode. Finally, James came to a stop. Dropping her hand, he glanced around the new corridor they found themselves in. Doubling over Lily gasped for breath clutching her midsection. Running on an empty stomach was not a good idea.

“Where are we?” she asked him as soon as a bit of air returned to her lungs. Not answering, James held his wand up and examined the corridor, there were many pictures clamoring about despite the late hour, even fewer torches graced the walls, and a distinct cold draft made Lily regret not putting socks on with her slippers.

“I don’t know,” the black-haired miscreant murmured. He continued muttering under his breath, examined the portraits and pressed his nose up against a window to get a view outside. “Ah. Fourth floor it seems. North end, I do believe the Hufflepuff Common Room is somewhere around here. Interesting. I didn’t know this hall existed. Evans, do you have bit of parchment?”

Still breathing heavily (which was an utter embarrassment seeing as he was doing just fine) Lily glared at him in a way that she hoped would emulate the effects of a Rash Growing Hex.

“And maybe a quill?” He ignored her heated glare and continued to look about, memorizing the corridor.

“I do not have any of those items I’m afraid,” Lily said combing her hair back as best she could. “And you are mistaken as to where we are, Hufflepuff’s Common Room is down near the first floor and dungeons.”

James’ eagerness fell. “Oh. But—I thought. . . Oh well. That’s disappointing. I heard their Common Room is right next to the Kitchens.”

Yanking her hands free of her bedhead hair Lily gave James a pointed look. “You heard the Hufflepuff Common Room is right next to the Kitchens?”

“Yes, that’s what I just—oh, I see,” James nodded slowly and rubbed his chin. “Well, as long as that’s sorted out, can we check out this corridor a bit more?”

“I hate boys.” The redhead while pacing in front of a dreadful depiction of Salazar Slytherin (a Gryffindor probably had a good time with that one). “No Potter we will not check out the corridor! Filch or Slughorn or McGonagall- McGonagall. Oh Merlin she will expel us for sure.”

“Relax Evans,” James drawled as he peaked around a statue. “We just tell her you were hungry. She can’t be mad at you for that. Aren’t you the one who is always saying that being honest is the best quality one can have?”

“Yes, I’m sure McGonagall we take you seriously and believe you were helping me find the Kitchens,” Lily muttered under her breath. James had already lost interest with her worrying and seemed intent on memorizing the layout of the corridor and where they were in relation to the ground. “Potter! Can we focus on the one task at hand and get me some food?”

“I need to focus?” He yelled incredulously. Ignoring Lily’s screech to “shut-up before someone hears,” and brilliantly dodging her swats, James shook a finger at her. “Which do you want Evans? Food or to not be caught?”

“You are insufferable.”

“I do try,” he said with a wink.

Lily blanched. Holy hippogriff I need to get out of here. Deciding that it would be better to fend for herself in the dark castle, even if she still got lost rather easily while navigating around, Lily turned on her heel and headed back in the direction they came from.

“Not that way!” James hissed lunging for her just at the same time another voice broke out at the opposite end of the corridor.

“Minerva I’m telling you, there are students out of bed,” the wheezened voice of Filch echoed down the hall.

“I’ve just come down this way not fifteen minutes ago,” McGonagall’s crisp voice came shortly after, and it was growing closer.

Lily didn’t need James to pull her back, she was already scrambling that way, yanking on the collar of his shirt. They collided roughly with a pillar, but neither made a sound, they only waited anxiously as the footsteps of the Professor and Caretaker came closer. When James tried to speak, Lily shushed him angrily.

“At least wait until after Halloween feast to kill me,” he was leaning to close into her as they tried to be as small as possible, “it’s always the best.”

It didn’t merit a response. Lily instead continued her list on possible death accidents that could occur in the castle. If that draft would just stop chilling her to the bones. Her thoughts stopped. James continued lamenting the loss of sweets and turkey he would miss out on if she killed him that night.

Smothering him with a hand Lily pressed her lips against his ear. “There’s a draft, it has to be a secret passageway.”

Immediately the boy leaped forward, slightly amazed at how quiet he was, Lily could only watch him lean against the wall, tapping it gently with his wand. With her heart pounding in her chest Lily couldn’t bring herself to move. A sudden rush of air caught her attention.

“Evans, get over here,” James whispered. Not needing to be told twice Lily spun around and had only enough time to realize that James Potter had managed to open a towering entry way in the corridor without much more that a huge gust of air.

“What?” Lily squeaked out.

“Admire my handiwork later, get in!” James responded pushing Lily into the secret passage. Stumbling forward Lily plunged into the darkness. Behind her James muttered a spell and the stone wall closed soundlessly.

Neither said anything, neither moved. After a moment, Lily realized she was holding her breath and very slowly released it. Stale air greeted her lungs on the inhale and it took all her effort not to break out in fits of coughs with the dust that coated the inside of her mouth. It was nasty, even worse than when she had to help clean out her aunt’s attic after she died.

The sound of James’ shuffling feet made her turn, though the passage was a smothering sort of black that Lily didn’t think her eyes would ever be able to see again.

“McGonagall’s yelling at Filch for getting her out of bed for no reason, it’s fantastic,” James sniggered from beside her. “Well, hope you aren’t scared of the dark Evans.”

“Lumos.”

“Ah, yes.”

Sometimes Lily wondered if James was more interested in the reactions he garnered from others than taking care to watch what he said.

In silence Lily led the way down the passage. It was a good thing her mouth was so full of dust and other disgusting tastes otherwise she would have hexed him then and there. The light from Lily’s wand was enough so they could avoid tripping in cracks and large rocks in the way. James remained several steps behind examining the passage as they went. He muttered under his breath but Lily was never able to catch any of it.

As they walked Lily could see changes in the structure of the walls, there were parts that seemed quite old, especially as they traveled farther down. Most of the rock and stone used in the construction was different than that of the rest of the castle. Granted the were walking inside the walls. How had she not known this existed? It was a magical castle founded by witches and wizards.

Suddenly, James began chuckling to himself. Pointing her wand in his direction, Lily raised an eyebrow. “What? Did you come up with another pun to make out of the naming of the planets? Or better yet another cruel name to call Dorcas?”

“Technically, Sirius was the mastermind behind both of those items,” James said quickly ducking out of the glow of her wand. “I’m not that cruel.”

“I beg to differ,” Lily muttered so quietly she wasn’t sure he even heard. Clearing her throat, she cast her gaze forward. “Then what is so amusing?”

A hand immediately went into his hair, both continuing to scruff it up and shaking out mounds of dust that he’d collected on their journey. “I just never thought I would be able to get the Great Lily Evans to break the rules.”

“Oh, I’m not breaking the rules,” Lily replied. “I have a perfectly good reason to be out of bed. It is completely unethical to starve a student; therefore, I should be allowed to find food in a desperate situation. There’s an exception that allows the rule breaking.”

Yawning loudly, and not at all convincingly, James cut her off. “All I heard is, “I am Lily Evans, I know the difference between brewing a Pepper-Up potion and a Sleeping Draught. Therefore, I can do whatever I want.’”

“I do not sound like that,” Lily scowled at him. “And that is not what I think about myself.”

“Whatever you say Evans,” he shrugged. “Besides, there is a flaw to your plan; if caught you would be caught with me, and no one would believe your innocence then. I am the anti-alibi.”

He seemed so proud of himself for the reputation he’d received, that Lily almost wanted to admit defeat. Almost. “Well, of course I’ve taken that into consideration. I would just throw you under the bus.”

“What?” Rather confused at the phrase James looked head on into the light emanating from Lily’s wand. “Gah!”

Pleased on both accounts of his outburst, Lily chuckled and lowered her wand. Only a little. “It’s a colloquialism Potter, a phrase. Like, “throw you to the wolves.” Just that I’d let you take the blame.”

“Throw me to the wolves all you like,” replied the young man with a smirk. “I’d fair rather well.”

There was deeper meaning to that, Lily was sure, but she wasn’t sure she actually wanted to know it. “Anyway, as you said, no one actually believes you would be innocent in anything mischievous. Thus, if we were to be caught, I would merely be seen as an innocent bystander.”

“You know,” James said as they followed a bend in the old corridor. “It seems to me a miracle that those girls spend time with you. Is this how you treat everyone suck the fun out of them like a dementor?”

The words hit her with such a force that Lily had to stop walking. A shudder rippled through her body and she felt it clamp down on her heart, squeezing it like a wet rag. He didn’t know it, but it that moment all Lily could see was her sister Petunia standing in the kitchen only setting three placemats on the table, telling Lily that a freak like her was sure to suck the life out of the room. It happened the night before she left for school, and she hadn’t wanted to cry about it, until now.

Potter had made it a decent ways down the corridor before he was about to leave the light of the wand. After he realized that Lily was no longer walking behind him, the young boy glanced around and finally saw her standing back, a deep frown etched on her face, her wand arm lowering bit by bit, as well as the light. Without saying anything, she narrowed her eyes at him and turned on her heel.

“Evans, c’mon!” James called after her. He fumbled for his own wand and tried to light his way, stubbing his toe on an uprooted tile, he cursed and swore as he tried to catch up to the other Gryffindor. “You aren’t seriously mad?”

Lily whirled around to face him with such force, the boy had to scramble back to be clear of smacking into her. “What does it look like Potter?”

“You are mad,” he said quietly.

It was in that moment Lily realized that he had never actually had anyone be mad at him before. Sure, she would see and his mates have scuffles, but nothing like the way Lily projecting towards him in this moment. In a way, she could pity him. But the way he oozed confidence even now in the full fury of her angry gaze drove that thought right out of her head just as soon as she thought it.

“Yes, I am. You called me a dementor! I don’t know how thing usually work in your fancy little pureblood world, but calling people names like that is rude and doesn’t do well to make friends. And yes, I am mad. Mad enough to say that you belong in Slytherin.”

They both stared at each other for a long time. Lily’s chest rose and fell and the fury built up within her, she could feel her fingers tighten with rage around her wand. Potter scowled at her, his lips twitching as he tried to think of something to say.

Shoving his glasses up his nose he crossed his arms. “You create an interesting paradox there, Evans. Based on the way you value friendship, if I were in Slytherin, you and I would be quite chummy wouldn’t we?”

Deciding that his comment didn’t merit a response, Lily turned away from him with such fury that she almost lost her balance.

“Evans,” Potter tried again. “The corridor ends just up here, I promise. C’mon.”

It took a moment before Lily turned around and slowly made her way to where he was. She kept her mouth firmly shut. True to his word after a few dozen steps, they came to the end of the corridor. Stepping forward, the young Marauder placed his wand against the stonework, a moment passed before the stone began moving in a slow way, silently easing open to a decent sized crack they would easily be able to pass through.

Lily passed through first and stepped out into what certainly looked like it was near the dungeons. The torches were always larger and closer together in the dungeons. There was always more of a distinct draft.

“Excellent,” James said coming up behind Lily. “I know just where we are.”

Pointing her wand and the newly formed escape route, Lily closed the way off and glanced down the hall. “Which way?”

“I thought we weren’t speaking to each other?” James replied mildly as he took his glasses of and buffed them on his shirt. “Seeing as how I am a Slytherin.”

Unable to look at him, whether out of guilt or annoyance, Lily wasn’t sure. She pointed down one way and decided to take the shot. “Seeing as how you’ve been little to no help tonight.”

“I literally opened a wall and saved us from Filch and McGonagall. All without throwing you under a bus as you say it.”

“Yes, you’ve been so helpful,” Lily said as she began walking. While they weren’t in the complete bowels of the dungeons, Lily still felt unease as they walked. It was always down here that she’d had bad experiences with Slytherin’s, and it was down here she highly doubted any professor would show mercy for students being out of bed. Even if they were hungry.

“You’re being sarcastic,” James scowled from beside her.

“You’ve finally understood the meaning of the red hair.” Lily laughed dryly. She shook her head, lips pursed as she considered what to say. “Honestly Potter, you got me locked out of Gryffindor Tower, dragged me around the castle on the run from Filch. And you haven’t delivered on your promise of getting me food.”

“I didn’t coerce you to do anything,” James reminded her. “You left the Tower of your own free will.”

“You still haven’t gotten me any food.”

James laughed running a hand up to his hair. Rolling her eyes Lily wondered why he always did that. She hadn’t noticed it until the start of this year really.

“If my sense of direction is correct, which it is, we should be nearing the kitchens on the left.” James finally took off down the corridor leaving Lily to sprint after him. Her feet were too loud for her liking upon the cold stone floors.

“What are we looking for?” She asked when she reached him again. James gave her a side look, eyebrow quirked. “Oh please, it’s Hogwarts, there’s got to be a strange magical way to get into the kitchens.”

James snorted, shaking his head muttering something under his breathe, Lily caught something along the lines of “too damn smart.” Aloud he acknowledges her observation. “Right you are my dear—” he dodged a swat from her, “rumor has it that there is a portrait we are looking for.”

“What kind of portrait?” she asked. There were plenty lining the walls, many of figures she didn’t recognize, most were asleep.

“It’s the Kitchens, take a wild guess.”

“See, this is why no one likes you,” Lily muttered looking down a corridor that branched off. She expected to see Filch teetering down at any minute wagging a craggily old finger at them.

“Oi!” James squawked offended. “There are plenty of people who like me.”

“Oh yes, your mother, of course.” They were coming up on a large painting, stretching at least twelve feet up the wall. It was a giant fruit basket. Lily stopped and stared at it, slightly amused. It couldn’t be could it?

“I think we have a winner,” James announced standing beside her. He aimed his wand at the portrait, nothing. “Oh come on then!”

Lily’s stomach grumbled. Scowling at James she tapped a foot. “Well Mister High Adventurer?”

“Get your stomach under wraps, Evans.” James returned the scowl. “I don’t see you helping out.”

“You assured me that that you could get me food, so I assume you can figure this out on your own,” Lily tucked her hair over one shoulder, her fingers catching in some knots.

“I take that as a compliment.”

“How on earth is that a compliment?”

“You said I could figure out how to break into a top-secret lair. Blimey Evans, it’s like being called Merlin himself.”

“I would hardly call the kitchens a top-secret lair, and that in no way relates to being Merlin or anything else of higher power. You’re a pigmy puff in comparison.”

“Hey!”

“Shush!” Lily pointed a finger at him, glaring menacingly. “Hurry up we’ve been out here—”

There suddenly came the high-pitched yowl of a cat. James and Lily froze glanced at one another and then down the corridor. Sitting beneath a torch was a cat. A rather fat cat.

“Elvendork really needs to go on a diet Evans,” James whispered, though Lily could hear a twitch in his voice.

“For the last time, my cat’s name is not Elvendork,” Lily snapped back. Her heart beat out of her chest with great anxiety. “And that is not my cat.”

“STUDENTS OUT OF BED! STUDENTS OUT OF BED!” Peeves the Poltergeist came swinging down the corridor screaming at the top of his . . . lungs? He technically wasn’t a ghost, nor was he alive so he couldn’t have lungs, could he? Lily didn’t have time to think about the actual answer as James pulled her down the hall.

“Now’s not the time to day dream Evans!”

“I wasn’t,” she began to argue back, but lost her words as James took her hand tightly in his own to guide her through the castle.

Peeves, somewhere behind them continued to make a ruckus, Mrs. Norris meowed again, too close for Lily’s comfort. Losing track of where they were, James finally came to a stop in front of a wall that somehow looked familiar.

Waving his wand, James breathed heavily as the wall moved reveling a doorway. “This’ll take you back to where McGonagall and Filch nearly had us. They’re going to be coming down here any minute so you should have a clear shot to the Common Room.”

“Lumos, what are you going to do?” Lily asked. It wasn’t as though she wasn’t entirely concerned for his safety or well-being, but she really didn’t want to slink through the walls of the castle on her own.

“Remus really likes chocolate,” James winked in the flickering torch like and pushed Lily into the secret passageway. Right behind her the wall quickly replaced itself.

“I’m still hungry!” She shouted even if he wouldn’t hear her. Bloody Potter. Oh she would murder him. She thought of her list from earlier as she began walking. Without realizing it, she was talking to herself. “Oh yes, perhaps a sledgehammer. Combined with the giant squid that’d work wonderfully.”

Moving quickly Lily found herself at the other end of the passage in no time. Carefully she eased out of the wall glancing around to be sure Filch wasn’t standing guard. When she felt sure the way was clear Lily stepped out into the corridor tapping the wall with her wand. Silently, the passage disappeared.

With no idea where she was, Lily held her wand in her palm. “Point me.”

Thank Merlin she paid attention in Charms. As loud as she dared, Lily ran through the castle, stopping only twice to catch her breath, and mutter a curse at Potter. Hopefully he got caught, maybe they’d make him have detention in the Forbidden Forest. No, he’d probably like that. Or perhaps something involving flobberworms. Yes. That was better.

Finally reaching Gryffindor Tower Lily gasped out the password to the Fat Lady (thankfully she’d returned). Either to sleepy or surprised, the Fat Lady said nothing as she swung open. Relief flood through Lily as she clambered through the portrait and made a mad dash to the Girl’s Dormitory.

Once in her room Lily finally seemed able to breathe. Shuffling through the dark, Lily found her bedside table, in the moonlight she saw that it was nearly three. Moaning, Lily added a possibility of disembowelment to her list. She’d decided to call it The Unfortunate Demise of James Potter. It had a nice ring to it.

Setting her wand aside, Lily didn’t bother to take off her robe and got into bed, and was only slightly surprised to find another inhabitant snuggled among her quilts. Chuckling softly, Lily pulled her blankets gently over to her side. Alice made a small protest of “snuggling is mandatory,” before breathing deeply. Still chuckling to herself, Lily’s eyes drooped shut as she, indeed, snuggled up to her friend. Only as she was on the cusp of dreams did she think; did James get caught?

.*.*.

Giggling like a maniac, James Potter dashed among suits of armor, a small sack of fudge clutched to his chest. Behind him he heard the haggard gasps of Filch trying to keep up. Peeves wasn’t making things any easier, but at least McGonagall was nowhere to be found.

As James ducked into another passage, Peeves was right there cackling madly. “It’s a mouse! It’s a mouse!”

“C’mon Peeves, help me out!” James pleaded between pants. The poltergeist made no response besides a howl of glee swooping about.

Groaning, James didn’t dare stop to catch his breath as he stumbled down another corridor. He had spent the better part of an hour running through the dungeons, dodging Filch and cursing Peeves. By a miracle he’d managed to make it to the fourth floor, but now he was trapped. Well, not trapped per say, but he couldn’t remember where there was a passage to duck into or not. Maybe he shouldn’t have gotten rid of Evans. Nah. She’d have made this at least ten times worse.

Did he dare tuck away into a broom closet? Perhaps an old classroom. He was too turned around to know for sure where he was.

A left. A right. Two more lefts and he was at a stairwell.

“Merciful Merlin,” he whispered.

Without another hesitation James began scrambling up, only stopping when he heard Filch at the bottom. Thankfully there was a bend in the stairs that kept James from view, his shadow was scarce in the torches. Filch muttered something under his breath but he made no effort to climb the stairs. A long breath left James’ puckered lips.

He stayed where he was though. No reason to underestimate Filch. Not now. Even Peeves lost interest in the chase, giving one last raspberry to the empty air; the Poltergeist darted off. When he was sure he was alone, James came down the stair he’d climbed up and hurried to find another way to Gryffindor Tower.

As he rounded a corner and came within sights of the Fat Lady, James was finally able to breath proper when a cat gave a, affronted meow. Cursing, James spun about twice before his eyes landed on a tabby cat sitting in a window sill. It looked vaguely familiar that James figured it had to be Lily’s.

“Elvendork,” James said cheerily, still a bit breathless. The cat gave him a pointed look as though it were questioning him on why he was out at this hour. “Oh don’t give me that.” He hefted the bag of fudge. “I needed to get something for Remus when he gets back.”

Plucking out a square, James chewed thoughtfully as the fudge melted in his mouth. Elvendork made a noise, nudging James with a paw.

“I went through a lot of trouble, I deserve at least one square,” James defended himself. “I’d offer you a piece, but I don’t think Lily would appreciate me feeding her cat fudge.”

The cat made no sound but seemed to glare at James with tired eyes. Blinking, the young man popped the last bit of fudge in his mouth and chewed quickly. The cat was creepy, just a bit.

“Well, don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.” James said hurrying away from Elevendork.

He would swear later that the cat laughed as he woke the Fat Lady up to enter the common room. If he’d paid closer attention though, he would have noticed that the cat was not Lily’s dear “Elvendork.” He would have noticed that this cat had distinct square markings around its eyes.

Safe in his dorm, James fell into his bed, pleased at the adventure he’d had and already thinking of the paths he had taken and where the secret passages lay. As his eyes drifted shut he wondered what would happen if Lily Evans knew he’d been lying. He’d known the whole time where the Kitchens were and how exactly to get into them. A small smile crossed his lips as sleep over came him. It was the longest they’d ever spent together without her hexing him.

“Progress Sirius, progress,” he muttered sleepily.

“Don’t wanna know,” came a muffled reply.

#jily fanfic #jily fanfiction #James Potter #Lily Evans #mauraders #mauraders era #moony wormtail padfoot and prongs #jilytober #Harry Potter #i'm sorry it's kinda bad but i just kept writing and now have to post it

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Bearable | A Reddie Fanfiction

Read it from the beginning

Chapter 7

"E-Eddie?" Bill's voice, loud and clear, echoed throughout the apartment just loud enough to be heard over the sounds from Eddie's Walkman, "Wuh-wanna come with me down to the p-puh-park?" Hastily, Eddie pulled his headphones from their place atop his head, leaning up on one elbow. His limps felt heavy, his eyes bleary with semi-sleep, a fog shrouding his brain. He was lying in bed, having never gotten out of it since he woke that morning- it was a Friday today, and his Fridays were always void of classes, so instead of getting up and starting his day with Stan and Bill at 7:00 am he had stayed in bed until, well, now- it was just past 5:00.

"Shit," Eddie hissed to himself, clicking 'pause' on his Walkman and setting both it and his headphones aside. He really hadn't meant to stay in bed so late. He hadn't eaten anything yet today, and silently cursed himself for it. He was afraid that he was developing a habit of missing meals; without his mother here to tell him what to do as she used to, he was forgetting all sorts of things. Sonia had been the very best at keeping Eddie on a set schedule, fitting meal times perfectly in between his medication times and getting him out of bed at 6:30 am sharp every morning, even weekends and holidays (which he had hated, but understood). Not having her here was strange- other than food, Eddie found himself forgetting to shower and do his laundry, too. He wouldn't have a single clean outfit if it weren't for his roommates.

"Eddie?" This time it was Stan who called, his voice just on the outside of Eddie's door, snapping him from his thoughts, "Are you dead in there or something?" With three knocks, Eddie called out 'come in!' and the door slipped open. At once, Stan frowned, already knowing that, so far, Eddie had spent his whole day in the same spot and had yet to do anything productive. One could tell by Eddie's disheveled hair and lack of shirt alone. "I'm making you something to eat and then you're coming down to the park with us," He said, his tone flat, leaving no room for argument. With a quick glance over his shoulder (towards where others were most likely waiting) Stan pushed into the room and shut the door behind him, "Come on, what do you want to wear?" As Stanley crossed the room to stop in front of the dresser, Eddie pushed his blankets aside. He felt a little weak, a little dizzy- most likely from the lack of nutrients- and silently cursed himself for losing track of time to such a degree yet again- he wondered how he had done it. With his trashy 12-hour mixtape playing in his ears he must have fallen into some sort of daze.

"Anything's fine," He shrugged, wiping at his eyes with the heels of his hands and then moving to stand at Stan's side so he could dig around his drawers on his own, "How'd your day go?" Stan was passing Eddie subtle, rapid glances, ones that clearly weren't meant to be noticed but were noticed anyways. You didn't have to be a genius to see that Stanley was nervous for Eddie, either his physical or his mental health- both of which were in decent enough places, by the way- and that he was probably desperate to go into some sort of mother mode. Instead of beginning to pester and maybe scold, he replied in a cool, collected voice,

"It was nice. Ben, Beverly and Richie caught me while leaving school," Stan's last Friday class ended at noon, so Ben, Bev and Richie must get out then as well, "and asked me to come down to the café with them." For a brief moment, almost unnoticeable, Eddie froze, and then forced his limbs to continue looking for suitable clothing.

"Ben, Beverly and Richie?" He asked, trying to keep his tone neutral and uncaring, "Are they here too then?" At once, Stan chuckled, shaking his he ad and bumping his elbow gently into Eddie's.

"No, Ed, Richie isn't here." Eddie gawked, startled as a rapid gone-and-then-gone thought shot through his head (how did you know Stan do you suspect that-), and was about to protest (yes, he had been curious about Bev and Ben too- but Richie had been his main curiosity, though he'd sooner die than admit it) but Stan continued before he could, "He and Bev had to work. Maybe we can stop by after the park. Ben's here, though," With a smile and another chuckle Stanley continued talking about his day. He had ordered a coffee, black, as usual, and chattered away with the three others before Beverly and Richie were swept behind the counter. Then, he and Ben had stuck around for a little while until Mike arrived, and then sooner or later Bill as well. Now, Ben, Bill and Stanley were here to gather up Eddie to go bird watching or sight seeing or whatever you called walking around and listening to Stan point and chatter about grackles or crows. Eddie had reached for a sweatshirt and Stan had rapidly shook his head, noting how hot it was outside today and that Eds would cook alive. Instead, he pulled out a short-sleeve button up tee laden with stripes of different colors, reds, yellows, dark blues and whites, along with dark grey jeans that were rolled up just above his ankles. "There," Stan said with a smile as Eddie finished slipping on a pair of white socks, "You look like you haven't been dead all day now." With careful hands, Stan leaned forwards to try and flatten down the mess of Eddie's hair. The shorter boy tried to flinch away with an exasperated groan, but gave in after a moment of fighting and let himself be pestered over. A small, tiny little part of him noted how nice it was to have Stan caring for him like this, how similar it was to the way his mother used to, but he pushed that thought away because he did not want to compare his mother to Stan.

"Thanks, idiot," Eddie grumbled after his hair was finally regulated, bashful and red in the face. The two boys, side by side, caught each other's eyes through the mirror. Stanley smiled, and one hand raised to rest on Eddie's shoulder.

"'Course, Eddie. Come on," He flicked his head, motioning for Eddie to follow, "Let's find you something to eat."

*****

Eddie had been greeted warmly by Ben and Bill, and then promptly fed leftover chicken caesar salad and the tallest glass of water he'd ever had. After he finished his food, a little embarrassed because Stan had been watching him like a hawk to make sure he ate every last bite, the group had left the apartment complex and made towards Back Cove Park, where they now walked side-by-side-by-side-by-side. Truth be told, the endless expanse that was the North Atlantic ocean was breathtaking, and the setting sun lit the rippling waves aflame. Though Back Cove Park was nothing like the Barrens, the footpaths did lead you towards a copse of trees about half the size of the jungle that was back in Derry. It was really nothing in comparison, but with the sound of the waves crashing against the shore no more than 100 feet away from the tree line, you could almost imagine that it was.

"You're going to break something Bill!" Eddie had his hands planted on his hips, face upturned to watch as Bill scaled a spindly pine tree, it's branches spiraling up and up and up and getting thinner with each, "You know the branches get weaker in the fall and winter, right? They could snap out from right under you and you wouldn't even be able to do anything!" Despite Eddie's worrying, Bill continued upwards with a haste that was almost inhuman- he was like a goddamn monkey for Christ's sake, taking his steps two branches at a time and giggling like a child each time something creaked underneath him. At last unable to continue watching (his anxiety was mounting steadily) Eddie spun on his heel and trekked away through the underbrush. Dried leaves crunched underfoot with each step thanks to the soft mulch covering the forest floor, and, if anything, that reminded him of the Barrens the most. In the fall the tangle of bushes and trees would turn orange and red, and then a deep brown, shedding their foliage and creating some sort of crackling sheet not unlike like some musical instrument. Stan and Ben were stood beside one another looking over a wide clearing and chattering about something Eddie couldn't quite piece together.

"But that raises another question," Stan mumbled, tapping his chin with one finger, "How would we get it down here? We don't have a car, and I guess we could bring it all down by hand but that would take a while," Ben straightened up, snapping his fingers as a grin split his face.

"I've got it! Mike's grandpa works at a farm, and I know he's got these big ATVs- Gators, I think they're called. I'm sure he wouldn't mind lending 'em to us for a day or two."

"Lending who what now?" Eddie stepped up on Ben's other side, his curiosity piqued. He glanced over the space before him where the trees thinned out for a good 50 feet and then grew dense once more. The break in the trees let slanted sunrays pass by to bathe the clearing in a golden glow.

"Eddie, perfect!" Ben turned to him with that same beaming smile, "What do you think-" He held out his hands, as if presenting a large project, a masterpiece he was very very proud of, "A clubhouse. No, wait- does that sound, like, lame? I... I don't know, but I've been eyeing this place for a while and I think it would be great to build in. Me and Stanley were talking about digging into the ground and making a sort of... underground hideaway so no, like, park rangers come by and report it. We could have a hidden trapdoor and everything. No one would even know it was there if we got it built fast enough!" Eddie took a brief moment to process, both Ben and Stan staring at him expectantly. Ben's words had come out in such a rush they put Eddie's chatter to shame, and despite his thoughts constantly racing a mile a minute he couldn't seem to comprehend what had been said. Slowly, he pieced together this plan, and then, his mouth dropped open as he fought to find the right words to express his outrage.

"Are you insane? Building a clubhouse in the ground?" A hand raised to pinch at the bridge of his nose, a sigh pressing out of his lungs, "With all the bugs and mold and fungus and shit? It's not safe to be digging around in that! And how would we even make it? As if we know anything about building a whole-ass clubhouse!" Stan's own smile overtook his face and he took a few steps closer.

"That's the thing! The cold will kill all of that gross stuff, and make the ground easy to dig without us getting all caked in mud! Before the snow falls we can have it built and winterized! We'll make it watertight, too! Ben knows how to do all of that!" The way both boys were smiling was reminiscent of two children who had just requested a puppy for Christmas- they were hopeful, pleading, almost- if Eddie said yes to this silly little idea then it would be decided. With Eddie's approval, Bill would think the idea as totally safe, and if Bill agreed then everyone else would too. If they could get Eddie to agree with them, then convincing the others would be easy. "Ben's in architecture, Eddie. He knows all about safety and building- he'll make sure everything goes okay." With a heaving sigh, Eddie let his shoulders sag, a frown on his face. He was reluctant to let this happen, but... well, if he supervised everyone to make sure no one did anything stupid then maybe it would be kind of cool. Maybe. And, if Ben really was in the architecture classes then he must know what he's doing.

"Fine," Two fists pumped into the air and a cheer rang out, "But, if anyone gets hurt, even once, I'm shutting it all down! I'm not letting you all get tetanus or aids from rusty nails and shit like that, okay?"

"We won't, don't worry! Come on," Ben punched Stan gently in the shoulder, "Let's go find Bill." At once, the two sped away, into the trees and in the direction of Bill. Following the crashing and crunching of fallen branches and leaves were their voices, loud and clear in the still, Autumn air, shouting up their crazy idea to Bill who must still be perched in the pine tree much like a bird Stan might find interesting and document in his bird book. With another heavy breath, Eddie turned back to the clearing, and really absorbed the details of the small place he was standing in. He missed the Barrens- the sad attempts at building dams, and even an attempt at building treehouse had been massive failures but they had still been lots of fun. Here in the small forest of Back Cove Park there was no bone-like bamboo to rattle eerily in the wind, calling silent warnings of fictional quick mud and tigers and creating the perfect environment to play jungle hunters. Here, there were no sewer drains spilling greywater into the Kenduskeag, which tumbled endlessly through the woods without restraint. Here, there were no paths trodden by children's feet, no trails flattened by generations and generations of walking and running and sneaking during a game of guns- but maybe, Eddie thinks, that will be okay. A clubhouse. A probably illegal underground clubhouse. It would give Eddie a new place to be, to spend his time. It will be a reason to return to these forests and to create new paths with new people, and maybe those paths will help them all one day just like the familiar ones back in Derry would have carried you away from the wrath of Henry Bowers. As Stan and Ben continued shouting their plan skywards, Eddie let the idea of a clubhouse grow on him just a tiny bit. A bud of excitement, even happiness, settled in the pit of his heart. It was warm and comforting, and he held to it tightly. Maybe this really was a good idea.

*****

By now the sun had set and cast the world into darkness. Though Eddie couldn't read his watch with the lack of light, he had to assume it was at least 9:00 pm and he was still in the forest with his friends; Bill, Ben, Stan and he had cleared some of the leaves from the clearing to expose the tough grass underneath, then Ben had found and rolled the smoothest stones he could find into the place to use as makeshift chairs. Now, the four were sat facing one another, a single flashlight in Bill's hand pointed upwards and casting an ominous too-white light over their faces that dragged shadows underneath their eyes and gave them the appearances of ghosts.

"Wait really? Like, full-on OCD? Not just... being a perfectionist or something? I know a lot of people say they have OCD when they actually don't," Ben was leaned forwards with his elbows on his knees, his steady gaze trained on Stan's who, in turn, had his hands clasped tidily in his lap.

"Yeah," He nodded, his curly hair a mess of bright browns and stark blacks thanks to the lighting, "If that's how you want to put it. I'm taking medication for it and stuff." Stan looked as if he were about to continue when Eddie cut in with a smile on his face,

"I remember one time Stan had come over to my house and I went to the bathroom for like- not even five fucking minutes. I left him in the kitchen and when I came out- oh my God," Eddie was already trying not to laugh, biting at his bottom lip to hold in the string of giggles that threatened to escape him, "He had organized everything. In five minutes! All the slats on my blinds had been straightened, all the dishes had been stacked big to small- the dishes!" Amusement grew in his chest, and he let it out in a sound one might imagine a coked-up chipmunk to make. He raised one hand to let it hover over his mouth, his eyes squinting, "I walked- I walked into the kitchen and caught him turning all my cans to face the front of the shelf!" Bill had cracked his own smile, a wide and toothy grin, and soon Ben had picked it up as well. Eddie wasn't certain why this was suddenly so funny. After being in bed all day his energy had shot through the roof. His laughter only grew and grew as he went on foretelling his story, his eyes beginning to glisten and his chest threatening to hurt. He didn't have his inhaler, but the slight concern he felt at that thought was quickly smothered by another wave of cackling, "I- I-I went hey! and he spun on his heel, his face all red- it- it was-" Eddie squeezed his eyes shut, his face hurting with his mirth, "He had a can of- of corn and- when he spun around he tip-" Through gasps for breath, wheezes that left him dizzy, he forced out, "He tipped over everything else on the shelf, too! All his hard work- like dominoes! Oh my God my mom was pissed! Stan was so- he looked like he was gonna die!" At last, Eddie couldn't hold himself together any longer. His amusement was contagious, and throughout the course of the story Bill and Ben had grown giddy all the same. Now, the three were howling, heads tipped back, rocking back and forth and fighting to get ahold of themselves while Stan on sat bashfully, a grin on his face. Briefly Eddie wondered why this felt so goddamn funny but found he didn't care.

"It was... I felt horrible," Stan had to raise his voice to be heard over the laughter of the three, his face visibly reddening even in the weak light, "Canned foods are expensive, and I didn't have the money to reimburse her or anything!" The howling laughter didn't cease, and, well, Stan decided that maybe this situation was funny enough to let himself laugh. His grin cracked wide and now he was giggling all the same, all flushed and breathless just like anyone else. Eddie was nearing physical pain but wow was that feeling fantastic. A good hard laugh was something rare to him and he always tried to soak in the moment when it arrived. His lungs burned, his head throbbed, and his eyes spat tears down his face. He glanced at Bill through bleary, slotted eyes and then at Stan and then at Ben, who were all laughing just the same, giddy off the feeling of being with one another. That feeling was just like when Eddie was with Stan and Bill, but amplified now that Ben was here too. That feeling was fantastic- That feeling was cut abruptly and Eddie shrieked like a madman as a sudden hand shot around his shoulders- all of a sudden, just like that, he was being pulled backwards into something, into someone- an arm around his throat in a chokehold threatening and dangerous and memories bad memories Henry Bowers and bullies and-

"Ooooooh looks like somebody Got Off A Good One!!" A fist was pressed into the top of his head and the sudden spurt of panic was gone again all at once- that giddy, light, precious hilarity returned and so did Eddie's grin as Richie trapped him in his arm and gave him a harsh noogie. It burned and Eddie didn't care as Richie continued off with that stupid MovieTone Newsreel Announcer voice, "Yowza, Eds, just YOW-za! You've got the stuff, kid, you've got the stuff for live theater! Sign right here on this dotted line and I'll get you on a stage! You'll make it big I know you will-!"

"Get off, Richie!! Beep fucking beep!" Eddie was giggling again, clawing at Richie's arms as tears streamed from his eyes, "Let me- Let me go!" He kicked and thrashed, writhing as a chorus of laughter continued on bright and bouncing. Somehow Eddie managed to wriggle free like a fish, and then he was rocketing up and bursting into a run as Richie reached to trap him again. He leaped from his seat on the rock, smiling from ear to ear- just as he had gained his freedom he saw Richie reaching to capture him once more but Eddie wouldn't let that happen. He glanced a single time over his shoulder to see Richie's own warm grin- that split second of time, no more than a heartbeat as Eddie's eyes locked with Richie's in a silent challenge, Eddie saw what was most likely the greatest thing he ever would. Richie's glasses were gently lit by the harsh LED from the flashlight- underneath the stupid coke bottles perched on his nose, Eddie could see the deep brown tone of his eyes and the way his smile pinched them gently in the corners. His teeth were miraculously straight, as if he'd had braces at some point in his life, and his cheeks wore a high flush. Eddie's head snapped forwards again and he set off into the forest, the darkness, hearing Richie's voice echoing behind him.

"I'll git ya Spaghetti! I'll git ya good 'n then I'll wrap y'up like a big 'ole presen', put ya undah my tree!" The New Yorker's accent rang through the trees with an almost surreal undertone, sending a shiver down Eddie's spine. Exhilaration ripped through him, lighting his veins aflame with a shaky happy-fear he didn't quite know how to explain. He was letting out little squeaky sounds, things like giggles of terror but he wasn't scared in the slightest. His chest was swelling with an almost-sick feeling, but it was a good kind of almost-sick. The emotion was confusing but reminded him strongly of childhood and he accepted it with open arms. As he crashed haphazardly through the undergrowth, eyes strained in the darkness, Eddie wasn't concerned in the slightest for what he might be pushing through- poison ivy, thorn bushes- shit, he could walk right over a corpse and he wouldn't be afraid for his health! Though certain he was not being too quiet, Richie was being even louder. Eddie had the upper hand here thanks to his significantly smaller, less gangly, more agile frame and also his ability not to be a big lumbering goofball every second of the day. Wyatt the Homicidal Bag-Boy was gone, and Richie was back in his place with his crooning, teasing, playful voice, "Eddie, my love! Come out come out wherever you are!"

Eddie's stomach did a weird little backflip, probably a symptom of his excitement as he decided that he was far enough away to start searching for a hiding spot. Years and years of hide-and-go-seek experience came flooding back to him, and he bit at his bottom lip to stop from making a single sound. He dropped into a crouch, scanning his surroundings in a flash; the darkness made it difficult to navigate, especially since everything was so unfamiliar as of now, but Eddie could work just fine with the silhouettes of trees and bushes. The beam from the flashlight danced through the trees, bobbing and waving around as Richie blundered closer by the second. Cheater, you shouldn't get a light, Eddie thought and then almost let out a bubble of laughter driven by his own delirium- he reached out a hand and brushed the brittle, hardened leaves of a bush, crawling immediately closer and trapping one between his fingers. Rubbing the surface rapidly, he deducted that it wasn't poison ivy (which had an oily feel, even when the leaves were dried) and used both hands to part the branches and skitter right through. He kept his head low, his shoulders and elbows tucked in with an expertise you could only get form having done this a billion times already. Hiding places like these were Eddie's specialty- this bush was small with tight-packed branches, but he was smaller and could fit just fine, whereas someone lankier like Bill or Stan would not stand a chance.

"Come ooooon Spaghetti-man!" Richie called out in a sing-song voice, only about 100 feet away, "If you don't come out right this instant I might just have to lure you, and trust me, you don't want that! My singing is just i-rre-sis-tible!" Eddie patted around him, finding a smooth, round stone about the size of a golf ball and clutching it tightly. Risking his spot just for a moment, he slid his front half out and pulled his arm back- then, with as much force as possible, he sent the rock flying. If everything had gone according to plan, the rock would have flown far and called Richie's attention away; that would have allowed Eddie to scurry back to the others with a smug smile to wait for the Trashmouth to give up and return to see him sitting proudly. Sadly, everything did not go according to plan, and the stone barely made it 10 feet. Eddie's throwing hand wasn't horrible- he considered himself rather strong for his size- but his vision sure was, and the rock collided with a thin, wiry tree and went clattering into the brittle leaves before making any great distance. At once, the beam of the flashlight went whipping towards the sound, and Eddie felt his heart leap into his throat. That almost-sick feeling went waving through him again as he shot back into the bushes and curled his knees into his chest, slapping a hand over his mouth. Through his mind ran the word shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit but he was grinning like an idiot and trembling lightly with stifled howling. The flashlight clicked off- now, total darkness ruled the world.

"Heeeeeeeeeere Eddie Eddie Eddie!" Richie's voice was like a breath of wind, far-off and terrifying. Eddie balled his hands into fists and bit down on the knuckles of his left, the right one wrapped tight around his knees to hold them as close, as out of sight, as possible, "Why are you hiding from me like this?" That was the last thing Richie said- the silence that followed was stifling. Far off, Eddie could hear the voices of his other friends, Bev's dancing titter was familiar now, as was the powerful tone of Mike's. All seven of them were here in the forest right now. Following that realization was another wave of childish glee, along with a swell of affection that was there and gone in an instant. Who knew Richie could move so silently? Not a single breeze stirred the branches, and not a leaf crunched under the sole of a sneaker. Eddie's own rapid breathing sounded much too loud, and he wouldn't be surprised if the thudding of his heart was as noisy as the beat of a drum. Anticipation, cold, crept up his spine and fed him a sudden alertness. It felt as if the world had brightened for a second, as if his eyes had sharpened and began to see crystal clear just for a blink. The outline of unruly hair, a mass of it, was suddenly discernable from the shape of the nature. Richie's head was bent, half-kneeling, and he was slinking around like a ninja. It was only for a brief moment that Eddie could see him before he was gone again, swallowed by the shadow, but he had been much, much closer than before- Eddie bit into his knuckle a little harder, afraid he would let out a squeak like a mouse.

The quiet seemed endless. Time lost all meaning. If it weren't for those far-off voices, Eddie would have been convinced that time might have frozen entirely. The air was cool and fresh, warmed to a pleasant bite and not the bitter iciness it would have been otherwise thanks to the days sunniness. Through the leaves blocking the sky Eddie could see faint glittering stars, but the pollution from the Portland lights almost smothered them entirely. It was fascinating to him- back in Derry, the stars had been crisp, clear, displaying their constellations with pride. Now, here, it was the polar opposite. Curious. Somewhere an owl hooted and Eddie jumped. Leaves crumbled beneath him- a twig snapped under one heel. He didn't even have time to register that he had made a noise.

"Eddie!!!" Eddie shrieked, a total screech, ear-splitting, blood-curdling, horrific enough to freeze the blood in your veins. Hands plunged through the foliage and then he was being dragged out by the arms, yanked to his feet and then swept right off of them as he was thrown over a shoulder. "Sure an' begorahh! I caught me-self a boyo, an' a foine one at that!"

"Richie! Richie!" Eddie was squealing as a hand wrapped tightly, securely around his waist, and then Richie was spinning, twirling Eddie with him in endless dizzying circles that brought out that bubbling fountain of laughter once more. "Richie no- no, put me down- Richie!!"

"I caught me-self a boyo! A foine, foine boyo!" Richie picked up a tune to his words, some improvised nothing-ness that was too, too funny. He began to dance, prancing around on light feet and rocking Eddie all around as he sang his words. "I caught me-self an Eddie!" Eddie's lungs were hurting again because of his lack of breath, tears rolling down his face in steady streams. Richie was laughing too and the sound of it made Eddie's stomach do it's little backflip yet again. His laughter was hearty, loud, the sound of someone who was entirely happy with life and all of it's wonders. The spinning didn't stop until Richie almost stumbled, stomping down on his shoelace and drawing out another cry from Eddie as he almost went to the ground. "Wooooah! Sorr-ee 'bout tha', Spaghe-i-man, rough rough wa-ers it be!" Richie took on the voice of a sea captain, dragging up the image of an old man with a peg-leg and a pipe hanging from a mouth full of golden teeth. Eddie was laughing only harder.

"Put me down you fucker! Let me- let me go!" Eddie began to pound on his back with his fists, and at last that flashlight clicked on again. The light was blinding after the absence of it, but Eddie couldn't care less. He was on cloud nine.

"Something tells me you wanna stay up there, Eds! Something tells me you- you wanna stay where you can see the whole world!" Richie took one more grand spin, a pirouette that would put a beginner ballerina to shame. It would have been impressive if Eddie hadn't had his eyes screwed shut to stop the flow of tears.

"Fuck you, Tozier! Let me down!" Alas, Tozier didn't comply. Instead, he began to hum the tune of 'Here Comes the Bride' as he took overdramatic, high-kneed steps towards the direction of the others- the hand that isn't wrapped tightly around Eddie's waist moves up to capture his legs, which had begun to kick and had almost knocked him right in the glasses.

"Watch the toes, Eds, you don't want to knock out these pearly whites, do you?"

"That's what I'm fucking going for you jackass!" Eddie brought his elbow back into the back of Richie's head, knocking it forwards with a dull thud and an 'oof!'.

"Oh-ho, you're in for it now, Eds! You asked for it!" And then, Richie began to tickle. Eddie felt his heart stop, and then begin to thud much too quickly. He could handle teasing and carrying and stupid singing but tickling- oh no, he didn't have the breath to deal with that. He was howling again, curling instinctively in on himself as much as he possibly could- which wasn't a lot, since he was tossed over Richie's shoulder and locked into place. Fingers jabbed and poked at his ribs, his sides, and he was in pure hysterics.

"No- No no no Richie Richie stop! Stop it stop it ohmygodRichieRichieRICHIE-" Eddie no longer had any breath. His screaming laughter had halted, now no more than painful wheezes. Tears soaked his face, soaked the back of Richie's shirt, and his cheeks were a bright beaming red. He wanted to scream at Richie to stop, to let him be, to please please spare him but oh my GOD he couldn't take it- Richie's hand pulled away and Eddie sucked in a heaving breath, his chest pulsing with each and every one as the lasts of his laughter forced it's way out. He felt like he was suffocating and for once it wasn't because he didn't have his inhaler.

"There," Richie said, the smug grin basically audible in his voice, "That'll teach you, Eds. No more elbowing!" Just to defy him, Eddie bumped him in the back of the head again- and then instantly regretted it as he felt Richie shift to tickle-attack him again.

"No! No no I'm sorry it was a joke-" Richie's own laughing burst out, and the hand dropped as he nearly doubled over. The tickling hand went to rest on his knee, and now he was the one howling away, that jovial sound echoing around the trees with a dream-like authenticity. It was bliss.

"Oh, Eddie, Christ you're just- you're a hoot!" Richie spoke as best he could through his growing breathlessness, and finally put Eddie down back onto solid ground, though the shorter boys knees wobbled as his own dizziness held strong. The two boys fell apart beside one another, grinning and sobbing and cackling like maniacs, fighting just to stay upright as their contentedness fed off of one another and radiated in warm, yellow rays. Minutes passed, more than 10, before either boy could regather themselves. Surprisingly, Richie was the first to go silent and manage to catch his breath- and then, just as Eddie did the same, the tone shifted, growing warmer yet. Eddie's eyes raised, locking with Richie's own. The Trashmouth wore his toothy smile, his eyes crinkled in the corners, bright as stars behind those coke-bottle glasses. Something heavy settled around them, something Eddie had never felt before and didn't recognize. Richie's head tilted, and the smile fell into something smaller, more serene, and yet almost ten times prettier. "I like the sound of your laugh, Eds." His voice was uncharacteristically sincere, and it took Eddie by surprise. The sudden flat tone was dripping with... affection? He wanted to answer, to say something back like 'Yours is nice too' or 'I like the sound of you shutting up' or anything at all, but before he could piece together a coherent phrase Richie was moving again. "Come on," He grabbed Eddie's hand- no, more like his wrist, and with no intent other than to guide him- and began to head back in the direction of the others, "I'm sure they'll want their light back."

Eddie's face was warm and red, and he had seemed to lose his voice. He felt like he was glowing with a soft light- and he felt like Richie was doing the same. He had never, ever laughed like that before. He had never, ever felt that free and normal and human. There was no voice of Sonia Kaspbrak, no warnings of broken necks or arms or noses, no shouting over bugs and thorns and rashes. For those last minutes, Eddie Kaspbrak had been just that- Eddie Kaspbrak. For once in his life he had not been Eddie Kaspbrak, son of Sonia Kaspbrak. He had just been himself. With Richie's hand around his wrist, dragging him, he wanted nothing more than to relive that moment forever and ever. If he died right now and went to heaven, he was certain that those moments alone with Richie would be what heaven was. The sound of his stupid, goofy laugh, the soft, almost manic dancing of those big, brown eyes, that lanky arm around his waist- that is what heaven was. Eddie found himself wanting to go back in time. The two arrived back with the others.

#reddie #reddie fanfiction #richie tozier #eddie kaspbrak #bill denbrough #stan uris #stanley uris #ben hanscom #beverly marsh #mike hanlon #the losers club #it #it movie #it chapter 1 #it chapter 2 #it 2017 #it 2019 #it chapter one #it chapter two

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jaehyunspeachparty · 5 years

Text

Daddy Jaehyun

i.viii.

a/n: I just wanted to write a drabble, but somehow it has become sooo long. I hope you like the 3.6k story and for ideas and request you can always write me.

Daddy Jaehyun Masterlist

Jaehyun sat at the dining table with his daughter Miga and both drew something. You were quite restless this morning. Every food wasn’t good for you, but you were very hungry. You search the entire kitchen to find something edible for you.

"Babe, are you okay?" Jaehyun was also nervous about you running all over the kitchen.

"We have nothing to eat." You lean exhausted against the fridge. The little boy in your belly did not make it easy for you in the last few days. He was very wild, constantly kicking and you had the weirdest cravings. It was never so bad with Miga and slowly your new pregnancy developed very differently.

"The fridge is completely full, don’t you really find anything?" Jaehyun laughed and set aside the pencils in front of him.

"No! I mean there is something…but no…that’s stupid.“ You start to run nervously through the apartment again.

„Y/N, what do you want? I'll get you anything you want." Jaehyun got up and drove through Miga’s hair. She loved it when he did this random. She always pinched her eyes together and started to smile.

"Do you remember this little bakery in the place where we got engaged? They had wholegrain pretzels with caramel and, oh, and then this cocoa with the salted marshmallows. I would give everything to get this.“

"And what if we go there?" Jaehyun's face was the same, but you were not sure if he was serious.

"That's 3 hours away!“ It was a small sweet place by the sea. Jaehyun proposed to you there years ago. You spent three nights in a small hotel and it was one of the best memories you had. From time to time you were still driving to this place. But since Miga was born, you have not visited it. Sometimes you wonder if much has changed.

"I'm serious! Let's go there, we'll stay there for one night. I have a free weekend, we should use that. Miga will love it.“ You liked Jaehyun's idea. As long as you were able to move, a little trip wouldn’t be a bad idea.

"Okay, then I'll pack the things for us." You grinned and kissed Jaehyun.

The drive was pretty calm. Miga had her nap right in the car so you did not have to listen to children's songs for three hours. Jaehyun and you could reminisce about your first visit at this place. It were cozy hours in the car and when you saw the sea, your heart got warm. Miga was still sleeping all the time, but you could not wait to show her the beach.

The first place you visited was the bakery with the special pretzel and cocoa. It was right on the pier so you could sit outside. Miga was still sleepy, but when she got a plate full of biscuits, she was suddenly very quickly awake.

"Maybe we should not give her that much sugar." You stir in your daughter's cocoa so it can cool faster.

"Oh, today it's okay. We're on vacation." Jaehyun grinned and looked into the distance. It was so peaceful here, the sea air smells wonderful and the sun threw a unique light on the village. And you finally had your long-awaited pretzel with caramel. When you ate the first one, you could not stop it. It was exactly what you needed.

"I think we have to buy a few more." Jaehyun laughed and tasted a piece. But he quickly made a disgusted face.

"Well, I don’t really like that. I don’t understand how you can eat so many of them." He took a long sip of his water to rinse the taste off.

"Ask your son in here, he's responsible for my cravings." You lean back and start stroking your stomach. And again you feel how the little one wriggled in you and kicked his feet.

„Hey little boy, let your mother eat something decent." Jaehyun also touched your belly and at that moment your child is firmly kicking his hand. His eyes grew big and he could not believe it at first.

"Was that a kick?" He stayed in the same place with his hand because he was almost frozen.

"And what a one." You exhale deeply, because this was also a bit painful and you was slightly sick. But it was the first time Jaehyun could feel him from the outside.

"I think he enjoys our trip too." You smiled while your husband continued to scan your stomach.

"Miga, do you want feel it too?" Jaehyun lifted your little daughter onto his lap, but she immediately turned to her father's chest.

"No." She had another biscuit in her hand and she quickly bit off.

"But don’t you like to say hello to your little brother?" Jaehyun kept trying, but it didn’t help. She clutched her biscuit firmly and shook her head.

"What are we going to do with you?" Jaehyun sighs and strokes his daughter's hair. Miga felt very comfortable on her father's lap, so she buried herself more in his upper body and continued to eat her biscuits.

"She's getting used to it. I think she just can not imagine a little sibling, but I'm sure she'll be a great big sister." You smiled softly and took a big sip of your cocoa.

"How relaxed you are when you give in to your cravings." Jaehyun started to laugh and looked at the empty plate, where all the caramel pretzels once lay. You lean aside and hold your belly.

"Hmm maybe, but maybe it's all this too. The place, you, Miga and this little boy in here." You feel so much love and calm at that moment that you sometimes wonder if that is the paradise. Maybe that was just your heavily hormonal emotions. But you could not remember the last time you felt so much happiness.

After you had drunk the cocoa and Miga had proudly eaten all their biscuits, you went for a walk threw the small streets. You explore the little place here, that had hardly changed and visited a small playground. Miga could romp there and played with other children. She was good at finding friends, she took care of other kids, so you didn’t worry that she will not accept her little brother. You see how well she interacted with other children and how happy she is because of them. You were sure it would do her good if she got a sibling.

You really wanted to experience the sunset on the beach, so you walked back to the sea in the evening. Jaehyun bought cotton candy, which you shared with your daughter. And so you sit in a beach chair and watched how the setting sun reflected in the water.

"Stay that way, I'll take a picture of you two." Jaehyun pulled his phone out of his pocket and opened the camera. Miga sat on your lap and she starts to smile. Jaehyun took some pictures, but he didn’t sit back to you. He stares at his screen and you can see him trying to read everything.

"Is everything okay?" You looked at him worried, because you were afraid that they need something from him at work. You finally had a weekend for you, you did not want it to end up that way.

"I don’t think so, Taeyong called several times, I'll call back quickly and see if there's a problem." Jaehyun sighed desperately, he didn’t want to be bothered with the work either. But you nod with confidence and he went a few feet away so he could make his call in peace. Miga was sitting next to you and looked into the sea.

"Do you like the sunset?" You stroked her hair and at the same time you controlled that she has not any strands of hair in her face. Her hair has become so long lately and she looked a little bit older. Your daughter is getting bigger and that makes you sentimental.

"Yessss." She grins and tries to get up, but you try to get her to sit again.

"Watch out Miga! You will hurt yourself." It was one of her bad habits that she got up anytime, anywhere. You were always afraid that she would fall off her chair and hurt herself. But she always listened to you and she sat down again.

"Miga I want to talk to you." You look lovingly at your daughter and stroke her cheek.

"You're a big girl now, right?" Miga nodded confidently and she turned closer to you.

"And we can now have a girl to girl talk right?" She nods again and looks at you with her dark brown eyes. She has exactly the same eyes as Jaehyun, the same dark color and the wonderful almond-like shape.

"I know you did not want a little brother, but you're going to be a big sister now and you have to be strong. You have to take care of him, if he comes, he will be very small and pretty fragile, like your dolls.“ She continues to look at you wide-eyed and you decide to lift her to your lap. You want to show your daughter that getting a brother is a good thing.

"You can teach him things and you can play a lot with him. That sounds funny, right?" You smile and look expectantly to your daughter. She stares into the distance, her fingers play with her lower lip and she nods.

"I want to play with him now." She looks at you wide-eyed and you had to laugh because of it.

"You need to wait a little bit. First he has to grow, then he can come." With one hand, you point to your stomach, which you start to stroke. Miga nudges your stomach with her little finger.

"Is he in there?" At this point she was quite fascinated and she tapped again against your belly.

"Yeah, and he's awake right now. Put your hand there.“ You pull your shirt up a bit, took your daughter's hand and put it on the spot where you feel the kicks. And when Miga put her palm on your skin, the little boy in you started kicking wildly.

"Wooaaahhh!" Miga was very excited and she started to giggle. The baby kicked more and your daughter could feel her brother for the first time. She kept giggling and you were glad that for the first time she accepted her sibling.

"Well, what did I miss?" Jaehyun came back and stood in front of you.

"Miga got to know her brother." You smile satisfied and gently stroke the back of your daughter.

"For real?" He laughed and leaned down to her. She nodded and hugged your stomach. It was so sweet and heartwarming that you had to cry a bit.

"Is everything okay? What did Taeyong say?" Meanwhile Miga climbed down from your lap and hangs herself on her father. Jaehyun took her in his arms and hesitated to answer.

"I'll tell you that later." He tried to smile, but you knew it was something that kept him busy. But you could not go on, as he had picked Miga up and walked a few steps to the sea.

"Look Miga. Right here I asked your mother if she wanted to marry me."

On the way to your hotel, Miga got tired and ended up sleeping on her dad's back. Jaehyun put on her pajamas gently and put her to bed. On the way you stopped also in a convinient store and have bought a few snacks and something to drink. Your hotel room had a terrace with a couch of pallets. While Jaehyun puts your daughter to bed, you preparing everything on the terrace. It was still pleasantly warm outside and you wanted to enjoy the togetherness this weekend as well.

"Unbelievable, she did not even wake up." Jaehyun came out and grabbed a bottle of Soju. He sat down in the corner of the couch and leaned back.

„I wish sometimes that I could sleep so well, but the little man in me becomes so active in the last days." You give yourself a ginger ale that has been one of your cravings lately too.

"Come to me." Jaehyun held out his hand and you followed him. You sit down between his legs and leaned your head against his shoulders.

"Would you like to tell me what Taeyong said?" You looked up at him and see how he took a sip of the bottle.

"They want to make a new mini-album with NCT U. Now they're going to talk about who's supposed to be in. Actually, I've always been most of the time in all NCT U's songs, but this time they're thinking of excluding me." You notice a sadness in his voice and you could imagine that it was certainly hard to be excluded somewhere.

"Taeyong wanted to know if he should stand up for me. But the talks will not start until next week anyway." He took another big gulp and then leaned his head against yours.

"Why did they want to exclude you?" You reach for his arm with your hand and lean with your cheek against them. Jaehyun laughed a little scornfully.

"Because I'm not so good for their marketing in NCT anymore. I'm married and soon I will have two kids. That's not interesting for fans and the idol market. But I don’t want to talk about it anymore, we should enjoy the evening." He kissed your temple and pushed you closer to him. Of course, you did not want him to make a comeback with NCT again. In a few months you would get your second child and you wanted him to be there for you, Miga, and your son. But for today it was better to put the topic aside.

Meanwhile it got colder and Jaehyun put a blanket over you. You are cuddled up there, reminiscing about how you got engaged or how you became pregnant with Miga for the first time. By the late evening Jaehyun was a little bit tipsy and he also became more touchy. His hands moved along your shoulders. With his fingers he stroke your collarbones and went down your breastbone into your décolleté.

"Are your breasts still hurting?" His voice was tender and his lips were close to your ear. Your hairs got up and you shake your head. His hands moved under your shirt and under your bra. Slowly he starts to massage your breasts. With his fingertips he plays with your nipples, which swelled slowly more and more. You hear Jaehyun groan softly in your ear, and you can barely keep yourself quiet too.

"Does it feel good?" He massages your breasts further, but this time his grip was much firmer.

"Yes." You lean your head back and moan softly. It felt so good that you forgot everything around you. You just wanted to feel him on your whole body.

"Hmm, your boobs are feeling better than ever. Oh my god, they're so big and firm, how would it be if I put my dick threw them." Jaehyun loved dirty talk when he was a little tipsy. Soberly he seldom spoke like that, but you liked this side. But maybe this was not the place to continue this kind of conversation.

"Jaehyun ..." You enjoyed his hand on you again, but you are already clutching his wrist to show that he should stop.

"Maybe we should move this to tomorrow when we get back home. Everyone can see us here and Miga sleeps inside." The downside of marring an idol was that in public you always had to watch what he or you did. People try always to make compromising photos. But you did not want to offer such people a platform.

"Hmm, you're right." Jaehyun slowly pulled his hand out of your breasts and put his arms around your belly. He gently strokes it and you closed your eyes.

"Can you believe we'll have another family member soon?" Jaehyun touched after the kicks as the baby just got quite alive. He has not let you sleep so well lately.

"Well, it's a bit more realistic for me because our son is always moving." You laugh and lean further into the shoulder of your husband.

"Hmm I know, but for me that's sometimes so incredible, you run around with a round belly for a few months and then ... there's just suddenly a baby there.“ He was right, it was a bit unbelievable. That's why it's probably called miracle. As a man, it must be particularly difficult, because you can only feel the baby by kicking. As a mother, you feel everything more intensively, you feel your child grow inside you and so you already have a very different relationship to each other.

"I can not wait to meet him." Jaehyun's voice was suddenly very quiet. He was so gentle and you could feel a little sadness.

"I feel the same." You look up at him and give him a kiss. You'll stay like this for a while, until you got tired and went to bed.

That night you finally could sleep through again. For the first time this week, the little boy in your stomach stayed calm. Maybe it was because you were so relaxed or because Miga slept in your bed. She was rarely allowed to do that except when Jaehyun was traveling. She then could always sleep in your bed. You still had your eyes closed, but you could feel the sun shining in the room. And then you heard the most beautiful sound: Your daughter’s giggling.

You open your eyes and see how Jaehyun and Miga were facing each other and how he was tickling his daughter.

"Stop daddy." But she did not want him to stop and he kept tickling her. Then he pulled Miga to him and gave her a kiss on the cheek.

"You're so cute, I think I have to eat you." Jaehyun pretend as if he was biting his daughter and tickled her again. The giggling of the two lights up the room and you watched them for a while while you stroke your belly. And there it was again, the feeling of happiness that flows through your veins. And in that moment you felt so blessed.

The morning passed quickly, you had breakfast in the hotel, bought even more caramel prezel for your future cravings and you ate something for lunch. But then your little holiday was over and you had to drive home slowly. It hurt you a bit to leave this beautiful place, but you were glad that Jaehyun brought you here. You hoped that the ride did not take too long, but then Miga suddenly had to go to the bathroom immediately. So you leave the highway to find a gas station, but there were the toilets locked. So Jaehyun went with her into the bushes, so that she could pee there.

"Daddy, why is the dog crying?" Miga looked wide-eyed at her father as she peed. Jaehyun held her under her armpits so she would not pee on her clothes.

"What do you mean?" Jaehyun looks around, but could not see anything. But when Miga was finished, she ran with her little feet to another bush.

"Here daddy." She gestured to something and Jaehyun came closer to examine it. And then he heard it too, the whimpering of a small dog. He then recognized the border of a box, which he immediately pulled out of the bush. It was a shoebox, with a few small holes. Jaehyun lifted the top and could not believe his eyes. In the box sat a small Shiba-Inu puppy, who was very dirty and trembling. Miga leaned down to him and tried to stroke him.

"Watch out." Jaehyun was afraid that the puppy would bite her. But Miga lightly pats his fell and the dog closes his eyes for a moment. He seems to like her.

"Is he hungry?" Miga was still looking intently at the puppy. Jaehyun picked up the box and looked closer at the dog.

"Yes I think so."

"Are we taking him home?“ Miga's eyes grew big again and she looked questioningly at her father.

"Let's see what your mother says." Jaehyun took the box with one hand and held his daughter's hand with the other. Both walked slowly back to the car and Jaehyun opened the passenger door. You looked to him curiously as he handed you the box.

"Look what Miga has found." You look in and see the little trembling puppy. Your heart hurt so much to see the little one so thin and scared.

"Was he abandon?" You carefully try to pet the puppy, who was really trusting. Jaehyun nodded and put Miga in the car seat.

"Mommy, can we keep him?" She begged you and you could not say no. This poor puppy had no mother anymore, someone had to take care of him. You were very sorry for the animal, but maybe it was just your mother hormones that persuaded you to take the animal.

"It looks like our family has grown. We have a puppy now.“ You smile and continue to stroke the puppy. Jaehyun has wanted a dog for so long, but you were never sure if there was enough time. But you wanted to give this little puppy a home.

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genderbinaryisforlosers · 4 years

Note

jupeter and buddy/vespa for the shipping meme

thank you!!! i love some gay space pirates!!!

jupeter

falls asleep on the couch: on the carte blanche specifically, juno. he, rita, and jet watch streams and he’s seen most of them before but he likes hanging out with them and easier to fall asleep with his bff and her gigantic, bodyguard-like new best friend than on his own

normally nureyev can fall asleep anywhere but neither juno nor peter would fall asleep on the couch on their own. they’re too worried that vepsa would stab them in their sleep

makes friends with the neighbors: juno had an office in hyperion city for years and he never talked to his neighbours a single time either there or at his apartment. probably the only interaction he had with any of them was making noise complaints

pete makes friends with the neighbours but it’s only to establish a cover, gather information, etc. neither of these men know how to socialise with people normally.

is the adventurous eater: junebug! he’s a good cook and when he’s got the cash and isn’t stuck in a spiral, he likes to make new things. sometimes he complains about the menu on the carte blanche but only because he’s secretly a food snob and they pick up so many of their meals from space gas stations. one day he’ll have the nerve to cook a group meal for the crew and they’ll never settle for anything else. one day…

peter is the least picky eater you’ve ever seen but he makes no effort to try new things. space hot pockets and energy drinks from space gas stations every day for two weeks? fine by him. easier to be sure it’s not poisoned than a meal at a 5-star restaurant.

hogs the covers at night: juno. peter makes up for it by cuddling him tight

forgets to do the dishes: team “nureyev has never done a domestic chore in his entire goddamn life” i will die on this hill

on the carte blanche juno finds it easier to remember, partly because his memory’s not being contsantly shot by severe depression. also buddy gets on his back about it (affectionately. he appreciates it secretly and she knows it)

tries to surprise their partner more often: obviously nureyev has the precedent and i think he wins this one by default because juno used almost every ounce of his spontaneity to become a space pirate and saves the rest for life-saving decision-making. but initially “ransom” is too tightly wound to make any spontaneous gestures

leaves dirty laundry on the floor: juno tries to pick it up quick if he does it because he doesn’t want to fall back into the habit. peter’s used to living out of a thimble and on the run, he never leaves anything lying around that he might want with him when he legs it

stays up til 2 AM reading: both of them! but juno’s more likely to do it by accident/when he’s supposed to have an early wake up call

sings in the shower: i feel like juno might do it to Cope? like to avoid a becoming despondent prune after like 45 minutes just standing in the shower. the singing is probably bad and he’s embarrassed by it. peter and rita think it’s cute and start doing it out of solidarity, and peter has an excellent singing voice.

(jet doesn’t indicate that he’s caught on but he starts singing m’tendere’s song in the shower too. buddy lightly makes fun of them all and suggests turning to music if crime doesn’t work out. vespa says she finds it annoying - voices behind walls. but it can be grounding sometimes, like if she’s seeing/hearing ransom, but can also hear him singing in the shower, she knows which one is more likely)

takes the selfies: watching juno try to operate a comms long enough to take a photo is an ordeal and rita has unofficially banned him from doing so. she’s too short to take a decent selfie of both of them though so she’ll set it on a timer and have juno just hold it. it works sometimes. more effective is getting nureyev to join in and hold the phone with his noodle arms. peter doesn’t like photos in general though. they leave too many traces and they tend to contain memories

plans date night: either of them. juno’s date night plans are constantly derailed and it stresses him out even though peter always enjoys what they end up doing anyway. peter’s date nights are either extremely standard (going for dinner) or completely goddamn bonkers (heisting a moving train)

buddy/vespa

falls asleep on the couch: neither of them on the carte blanche. vespa’s too paranoid and buddy won’t go to sleep without vespa if she can help it.

makes friends with the neighbors: buddy. she’d do it for cover or for info, but also just for the sake of it. she’s a community-oriented person, she’s used to being surrounded by people at the lighthouse, and sometimes she needs to get away from her own family’s Nonsense. if the carte blanche had neighbours she’d be all over it.

is the adventurous eater: buddy used to be, when Adventure was most of what they did, but it’s not a priority anymore and she doesn’t particularly mourn the loss of it. it was only really fun when she could get through vepsa’s anxiety long enough to convince her to try something she knows she’d like. but ves likes to know Exactly What She’s Eating and that’s reasonable. it’s not worth the time and effort to convince her to eat something that she’s going to worry is poison.

hogs the covers at night: i feel like they don’t do that. vespa probably kicks the covers off though

forgets to do the dishes: vespa. if she needs private time when it’s her turn then buddy usually passes the task onto juno and at first he’s pissy but he understands and he’s trying to develop these habits anyway

tries to surprise their partner more often: they’ve had enough of surprises

leaves dirty laundry on the floor: neither of them. like pete, they’re used to living to a schedule that has to be adaptable to unexpected exit strategies

stays up til 2 AM reading: buddy but not for fun. there’s a lot to do as captain of a ship, a seemingly endless amount of things to remember. sometimes she reads over mission details just to avoid going through the family dynamics in her head again, what information everyone has etc

sings in the shower: vespa tries it once or twice when the others start doing it, privately. she doesn’t care for it. buddy will not grace the shower with her voice and she usually showers too quick to think about it

takes the selfies: when they were younger, buddy. she’s taller and weighs up the sentimental value/risk in its favour, unlike vespa, who sees them as an unnecessary liability like peter does

plans date night: buddy. it’s always planned to perfection. she always accounts for vespa hitting her limit at any point in the evening, which is more than vespa does for herself

send me a pairing and i’ll answer these prompts!

#jupeter #vesbud #juno steel #peter nureyev #buddy aurinko #vespa ilkay #juniverse #the penumbra #ask games #michaelburnnham #riley replies

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hostgalli19 · 4 years

Text

Not Worth It - Chapter 1: Please Stop... I’m Sorry

Story Summary: No one really considered how much Megan Reed had to do with Jensen's current disposition or his aversion to touch or the way he refused to disengaged his tactical lens when speaking to someone.

Megan found out very quickly she wouldn't be getting Jensen back no matter how much she might want to. David Sarif should have looked over that contract before signing it.

Chapter Summary: It took Jensen a long time to get used to his augments and even longer to get over what Megan did to him.

Notes: I’ve been meaning to post this on here for the last several days but have been busy and haven’t gotten the chance to until now. This is my newest story and is the result of me getting into Deus Ex Length: 1,176 words (2 pages) Link to Ao3

Date: 11/01/21 - 14/01/21 Time: 6:55 pm - 11:14 pm

Jensen curled up in bed dreading Megan getting home and praying she would stay at work just a little longer. He had made sure the apartment was tidy, everything was in the right place. He hadn’t yet started dinner yet even though he very much wanted to. He had wanted to go out with his co-workers but knew Megan would be upset he wasn’t spending time with her.

She always found out when he did something without her permission, even if he had asked her about it. He had taken to recording all their conversations (without her knowledge) just to reassure himself he wasn’t going insane. He had an eidetic memory. He never forgot anything and yet…

He had taken to calling her instead of texting. Every time he texted her, they would only sometimes go through but never when he needed them to. Kubrick only left him alone when Megan forced him out of the room so they could have some ‘fun’. While Kubrick never growled at Megan but he made it obvious he did not like Megan.

Jensen didn’t want to get up but knew he had to make dinner before Megan got home. He had just put dinner on the table when Megan finally got home. She smiled and kissed him for the first in almost three months. The only other time she touched him was when they were having ‘fun’.

He knew the affection wasn’t going to last but he would enjoy it until Megan had some other project that was “stressing her out” and she stopped touching him except for when she wanted sex. Jensen tried not to cry as Megan continued to use him even though he was exhausted. He wanted to go to sleep but knew that wasn’t going to happen for a while.

He had long since perfected the ability to turn off his brain and rest without Megan noticing. It was the only way he managed to get a decent rest when Megan was in a particular mood, she hadn’t realised yet.

He knew she was going to beat him up if she realised he wasn’t paying attention to her. He hated it when he wasn’t paying attention. He whimpered when Megan pinched his nipple harshly.

He responded exactly how she wanted even though he was exhausted and only half awake. He soaked up the attention. Jensen was only half aware of her climbing off of him as he rolled over and fell asleep not at all surprised when she had disappeared in the morning. It was months before she touched him again in a pleasant way, she was rough even in the bedroom.

Things got worse after he took the job at Sarif Industries. He didn’t remember signing his contract despite knowing he made changes to it.

It took Jensen several months to get used to his augments. Laura was the one who developed the technology to heat his augments making them the same temperature as the still human parts of his body. It took several weeks for him to get used to how strong he now was and how hard he could hold something for it broke. Learning how to walk again was… difficult.

Walking was easy it was getting used to the weight of his arguments that took a while.

Despite what people thought he could actually feel what he was touching or who was touching him. It took a while to figure out how to turn down the sensitivity of his augments.

Megan hadn’t once come to visit. Not that he was allowed. Nor she would have had she been able. When he was allowed to return to his apartment Sarif had brought for him he ended up breaking the mirror.

Megan had been furious when she found out (how she found out he didn’t know). Despite the fact, he could now protect himself from Megan the blows hurt. He ended up curled up in the corner of his bathroom.

The next six months were hell between getting used to his many augments and dealing with Megan he was exhausted and at the end of his rope, by the time he was brought off medical leave.

The task wasn’t easy but he managed to get himself and everyone else through it with minimal injuries. He was almost glad when Megan was ‘kidnapped’. He knew she hadn’t really fought the kidnapper’s no matter what anyone said.

Once everything was said and done he curled up and tried to forget everything.

He asked Pritchard to update his apartment security to prevent Megan Reed from getting into his apartment. Pritchard hadn’t asked questions only requesting Jensen a code no one would know save he and Pritchard. He strangely wasn’t bothered about Pritchard knowing the code to his apartment.

t took what felt like several months to get used to being on his own again, he knew he had to eat enough to keep his energy level up. Megan had strictly controlled what he could and couldn’t eat. Even after the accident. The only thing she didn’t stop him from eating cereal. He could eat as much of it as he wanted to.

He hadn’t know why until he realised he was allowed to eat so much because it was never quite enough to him a lot of energy. When he was living with Megan he had taken to hiding cereal boxes in places he knew Megan wouldn’t look.

After the accident, he lived off gell packets, cereal and whatever fruit he could get his hands on. He was only allowed three ‘good’ meals a week. Only if he had been ‘good enough’ according to Megan.

He knew he didn’t have to worry about Megan anymore but he couldn’t break some habits. He managed to break some of those habits over the following 10 years. It took a lot of effort but he managed it.

He still hid cereal boxes around his apartment. That was the one habit he couldn’t break. Everyone but Pritchard teased him about it. Pritchard never once made a comment about Jensen’s eating habits.

What he wore or anything personal. His comments about Jensen’s hacking ability which were valid. The comments weren’t as biting as they sounded.

No one realised anything was ‘wrong’ with Jensen until someone walked up behind him and said something and touched Jensen’s neck the way Megan did when he had seriously fucked up.

Instead of freezing up like he usually did, his body just reacted. The force of the blow was hard enough to wind the person as he spun around and backed himself into the corner and tried to convince himself he was safe.

He could hear shouting and clamped his hands over his ears and curled in a ball.

“Jensen? Can I touch you? Its alright,”

Note: I hope you enjoyed this chapter. The next chapter should be up soon. I've already written around 3ish pages already before deciding to post it, please let me know what you think. If you would like to be added to the tag List please let me know

#Deus Ex #deus ex mankind divided #deus ex human revolution #Adam Jensen #Francis Pritchard #my ao3 Deus Ex stories

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nightwingshero · 4 years

Note

Rosemary, abatina, dill, hollyhock, and sweet pear for whoever you feel like talking about! 💜

Thank you, hun!!! I did a mixture, because I’m missing some old OCs of mine, and some need serious development. Yeah, so it got really long, I am so sorry!

Rosemary: What's their fondest memory?

Blair: It would probably be laying out in the backyard with her dad while they watched the stars, or her dad buying her that nice telescope that he’d use with her. It meant a lot to her that her parents indulged when it came to her interests, they were always supportive. Most of her time was spent at aquariums, the observatory, zoos, and just doing a lot of stuff with her parents. Science fairs were always a blast, because her parents would help.

Emma: This would be either her and her brother Mark playing in the pond they had or playing football on the beach in the summer. Em would also work on an old Mustang, one she’s still helping him build, and Ash would come over most days and they would all just have a huge dinner in the backyard. Georgia gave decent weather for it. Most of her fondest memories are with her family or Ashton, because they grew up together and did a lot together when Emma’s family moved there. A beautiful, sunny day in Summer always takes her back.

Quinn: There were times where they would travel back to Russia to visit the remaining members of his mother’s family, and he would love it. Quinn absolutely adored his babushka, and the stories she would tell. His mother would tell the same tales, but it wasn’t the same as how his babushka would tell it. There was also sailing with his father. That was something Quinn thoroughly enjoyed, and it was something they continued on doing until his father died.

Wren: Definitely playing piano with her mother! That is probably the most precious moment for her. When she plays it now, she still feels as if her mother is there with her. Not only that, but her music teacher was her one good thing growing up. Mrs. Hall taught Wren how to actually play, and when Wren would sneak to lessons (under the guise of studying or going to the library), Mrs. Hall would often bake cookies and brownies for Wren, as if she were her own grandmother. Wren attended her funeral when she passed, and it actually felt like she had lost her grandmother when she heard. But those are memories she holds dear.

Abatina: Are they very picky or particular about anything?

Blair: Not really, no. Blair is rather easy going and goes with the flow. I think the one thing would be don’t touch her work station. It’s organized chaos with an actual system that only she knows, and she will absolutely lose it if you mess with anything because that’s her life’s work you’re messing with. I think that could be said for any scientist though, and she is very verbal about it. It’s a light reminder, or a happy request until you get too close and she becomes slightly frazzled and makes you keep your distance.

Emma: She can be an absolute control freak and has to have things a certain way (whether that’s because she was in the Marines or if she inherited it from her mother, who’s to say?) No eating in her cars, don’t touch her guns, and if you’re going along with her on something, you’re following her lead. Ashton, Nora, and even Roach give her hell for it, but honestly? Sometimes she can’t help it. Emma has a habit of taking control of a situation when it calls for it and she’s a super organized and neat person. Everything has it’s place, things are cleaned or done a certain way, and she would rather just do it herself.

Quinn: His hair and shoes. Listen, Quinn is very boyish in looks (there’s a reason Ryan Gosling is his faceclaim) and his hair is usually neat or done how he wants it. He’s not overbearing about it, he just takes his time with it because he does put care into his appearance. His shoes are shined, his clothes match and his outfit is sharp, he doesn’t go more than a few days without shaving. Once the Collapse happens, it’s one of the things he can control, so he does. Grayson often jokes he’s the prettiest guy of Armageddon, but Quinn laughs with him.

Wren: She doesn’t like it when other people drive. Having been in a traumatizing car accident, she prefers to be at the wheel for that sense of control. It’s honestly makes her so damn anxious when that’s not the case, and Quinn drives like a damn maniac from time to time in New Dawn. She will cling to something for dear life, and absolutely will backseat drive. It leads to a lot of spats between her and Jane, Quinn, and Ivy.

Dill: Do they have any rivals?

Blair: I would say that one of the biggest would be John Constantine. Blair is skeptical when it comes to the mystical and supernatural, needless to say, she absolutely does not believe in magic. However, when the Particle Accelerator went off, someone close to her was wearing a totem or a spiritual pendent that got mixed into her meta powers (it’s how she can cosmic project and do some of the things she can with energy manipulation...it also helps balance out her going supernova and such), so...some of her powers are part of the arcane. Johnny knew that the second he met her, so when she gave him grief and became skeptical when he was helping Ollie bring Sara’s soul back, he just smirked at her and went “hate to burst your little bubble, love--” and honestly, they’ve been at it from there.

Emma: Ha! Emma is competitive and very proud, so yeah, she has rivals, some more fun than others though. For example, her rivalry with Nikolai (and sometimes Price) is who can drink the other under the table. Yuri...well, they ended up in a fist fight on a misunderstanding when they first met, so while he’s working with her and the 141, there’s definitely some rivalry there with them trying to one up the other. She’ll spar with Ghost to see who is better too. Honestly, she’s always up for a challenge, and its something she shares with a lot of her fellow Marines back home--including her cousin and her teammates.

Quinn: John fucking Seed. Listen, they hate each other, full on loathing, because Quinn isn’t afraid to point out that he’s in a cult and we all know how John is when someone makes him feel insecure and inadequate...with Quinn he very much does, even if that isn’t his intention. It also doesn’t help that John notices how Quinn looks at his wife from time to time, and he doesn’t appreciate it, but the biggest thing is that Quinn openly challenges him on everything. To Quinn, he wants to poke holes in his logic and show that John isn’t at all what he thinks he is. Quinn is a natural leader, he had been in the Navy, he knows what that looks like and he’s quick to call John out on shit. Wren gives him a bit of a run, too, their rivalry just happens to uh...turn into something else.

Wren: Holly Pepper and Mary May Fairgrave. Those are the two that gives her the most trouble. In any other scenario (and in most AUs), Wren and Mary May get along just fine, but in canon? Wren straight up punches her in the face. There’s more to it, of course. Wren is being worn down by people wanting her to do this and that for the Resistance, her constantly being pulled in every direction and being forced to give to people without them giving in return. And Mary May wouldn’t shut up about the truck, while saying Wren was dragging her feet on what the Resistance needed done (mostly because Wren was sleeping around with John, but they didn’t know that yet), and Wren just gets overwhelmed with frustration and anger, and straight up punches her in the face and tells her “if you want the truck so damn bad, go get it yourself”, and storms out. Holly Pepper later becomes an issue because she knows John slept around with her, and Holly loves shoving it in Wren’s face. So...Holly ends up dying because she straight up attacks Wren, and Jane helps her with it because she knows that John has a soft spot for Wren. Plus there’s that little shit Quinn in New Dawn...they’re a lot of fun.

Hollyhock: What's their biggest goal right now?

Blair: Currently, it’s to find her place and stride with the team and her powers. She just wants to not have to lay awake at night and worry she’ll lose control again and hurt her friends and loved ones. Her whole life has changed, and there are still things that are throwing her off. She needs to find her footing again and feel more confident in what she’s become. Helping people, including herself and teammates/friends, is what’s most important to her.

Emma: As of right now, it’s to regroup and hunt down Makarov. She’s still healing from when Shepherd took out the 141 base and tried to kill her, Ashton, and Nora. The stitches are still healing a bit, but she’s pumped up and ready to take him down. Her goal, and focus, is doing whatever Price and Soap need her to do. It’s almost tunnel vision at this point.

Quinn: Take down the Highwaymen and fix whatever bullshit Whitney and Wren have going on. He won’t at all pretend he knows what fucking type of politics they have in New Eden, or what rules they’re going by, but it’s very damn clear that Ethan is no good and needs taken down. Him and Grayson came because Carmina asked Rush, and they were never ones to back down from a challenge, not when it comes to helping those in need. So, he’s gonna take down Mickey and Lou, allow Grayson to avenge Rush while protecting Prosperity, and then stand with Wren and Whitney as they take over New Eden.

Wren: That depends on if we’re talking Far Cry 5 or New Dawn, but she’s mostly taking out the head Seed and establishing peace. She’s trying to do what’s right, and whether that’s for herself (which is the eventuality of her changing sides) in Far Cry 5, or for their people and her family in New Dawn (overthrowing Ethan and opening New Eden to more freedoms.) It’s all revolved around Eden’s Gate though, and she agrees to help Quinn and Grayson because she still cares about Kim and Nick, and much of the others, so it’s just a pitstop on her plan.

Sweet pea: If you had to choose a favorite dessert for them, what would it be?

Blair: Crème Brule, strawberry shortcake, or chocolate lava cake. You could say all of the above, to be honest, she loves sweets. Blair is always snacking, and they’re usually little cakes, fruits, or something sweet. There’s a reason crepes are her favorite breakfast foods, fruit and sweet? Yes. Which I guess you could add porfait on the breakfast menu too, in that case...anyway, snacking is usually something her and Mick has in common, though she’s not constantly looking for it the way he is. Mick finds food in missions and randomly...Blair is more disciplined than that. She will grab stuff for him a lot of the times if they’re in the same room or if she’s working near him. Leonard just stares between them, he’s not sure what he thinks of their comrade (he also lost his more recent memories, so he can shut it.)

Emma: Dark chocolate cake or tarts. Anything that has a bitter or sour tinge to it, because she’s not really a sweets person. Not when it comes to that, at least. She loves her mom’s sweet tea (and homemade lemonade). But she just would have something like raspberry butter cookies, cherry pie, or even an old fashioned ice cream (yes, with bourbon). She loves dark chocolate though. And tiramisu.

Quinn: Oh, he loves the Russian desserts his mom would make, and honestly, Quinn has such a sweet tooth. Bird’s milk cake, Russian rugelach, waffle cakes, and especially kartoshka. He would help his mom (or babushka when they would visit Russia), and would eat them with Russian tea they would make. He also enjoys many flavors of gelato.

Wren: Cheesecake. Without a doubt. She has always been, and will forever be, in love with cheesecake. And all kinds, if we’re being totally honest. She will eat any flavor, she feels strongly about it. You wanna piss her off easily? Eat her cheesecake. Wanna get on her good side again? Bring her cheesecake. John does. Whenever he’s in trouble, he throws a cheesecake on it. She’s constantly eating it to the point Whitney and Rowan have both reminded her that it’s not a meal. Does she listen? No.

#oc: blair chambers #oc: emma miller #oc: quinn langdon #oc: wren blake #my ocs #asks #arrowverse #call of duty #far cry new dawn #far cry 5

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bedbellyandbeyond · 4 years

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Two Moons

(Story Post)

On wolf nights, Nathan still spent his time at APID but now Sydryn had arranged for him to have a family suite, one big enough for the twins to stay in and for Dax to sleep over. His worry about having Dax and the twins with the wolf slowly faded as Dax often recounted to him the majority of what happens when he turned, and it was mostly nothing. The wolf fed the twins regularly when they were hungry, curled up with them when they were tired. For the most part, they all shared the bed, and Dax even got to snuggle in behind his big fluffy boyfriend to get sleep for a decent amount of time. The twins were starting to get into the habit of turning at the same time as Nathan, but it wasn’t a sure thing and Dax would have to take over when they were human, as the wolf, though gentle with them in any form, could not change diapers.

At two months old, Grace and Gabriel were hitting their development milestones on time. Both could hold their heads up while on their tummies. Both showed interest in toy and noises around them, though grabbing wasn’t yet a thing except mostly by accident. As pup and cub however, they were growing differently. Grace was developing ahead of her brother in that regard. As a pup, she was already starting to figure out some crawling techniques, and could be found chewing her dad’s ear sometimes. Gabriel on the other hand, though bigger than her, wasn’t at all mobile and constantly wanted to be feeding, always curled up at the teat. They were both eating and pooping machines, and slept a lot. The majority of the time, Nathan spent inside with the kids, while Dax would go out and get food and any supplies they needed. The pregnancy group still happened on Friday’s and if Nathan couldn’t bring himself out to their meeting room for whatever reason, the group would always swing by his room to check in and hang out. It had been a few weeks since Dari and Fay had their twins, so they were missing, but up until then they’d been in group regularly. Yori was absent a couple of weeks before as his family had gone on vacation over the school break, but he was back again and eager to talk about his trip with anyone who’d listen. Despite not going outside much, it felt like Nathan’s little family was very popular. Even APID E faculty dropped by after class times to see the babies. Because of the frequency of visitors, Nathan felt like he had seen everyone still rather regularly. Apparently not. One afternoon while he was feeding the twins, there was a strong knock on the door. Dax was taking a nap and was apparently exhausted because he didn’t even budge. “Coming.” Nathan sighed and set Grace down in her bassinet since she seemed to be done. He pulled a robe over himself and Gabriel and went to the door. Opening it, he found his dear friend Wano, violet in the face (blue blooded version of red in the face) and glaring him down. “Wano, what’s going on?” Nathan said. “Are you okay?” “Two moons,” Wano said. “Two and almost another moon and you never come to the cafeteria.” “Oh. Um, I’m really sorry…” Nathan said. “I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I’ve been a little occupied.” Wano nodded in acknowledgment. “But you still need to eat. You should’ve come eat.” “Dax’s been bringing in food mostly,” Nathan said. “But, I’m sorry Wano. I didn’t realise our mealtimes meant that much to you. But you could’ve always stopped by.” “Am I not? I’m stopping by now,” Wano stated. “You appear healthy. Are you in good health?” “Well, that’s debatable, but mostly, yeah,” Nathan said. “Could be worse.” “Good. And you’re not likely pregnant since humans typically take time off that to raise their young for a bit, yes?” “Well, most do, sure. Maybe not Dari…” “Is that another race?” “No, it’s a friend. Never mind.” “Male?” “Yeah, why?” Wano narrowed his eyes. “What height?” “Oh, I dunno… Pretty short… Why?” Wano nodded approvingly. “Only friend sized.” “Sure?” “Good. So, being as your womb is vacant…” Wano produced a fistful of flowers from behind his back and shoved them towards Nathan. “I’d like to propose a mating partnership.” Nathan blinked and stared at the alien man. “…You want to…marry me?” Wano nodded. “Mostly, interspecies relationship is frowned upon in my culture, however humans are the originators. Your species is a precious part of the universe. To mate with you would strengthen my familial bloodline.” “Um…” Nathan couldn’t tell if it was sweet or insulting. “I’m in a relationship?” “With him?” Wano pointed to Dax still lying in bed. “I could fight him for you. I’d win. He leaves himself easily vulnerable.” “He’s napping. You’re not fighting anyone. That’s not how this works. I chose Dax,” Nathan said. “I’m happy with my choice. And it sounds like you want someone to start a family with, and frankly I’m pretty sure I don’t want to get pregnant again.” “Well, um…” Wano faltered for a moment. “It does not need to be a mating partnership… I hear your species fornicates for pleasure. Our partnership could be that.” “Wano, I’m not available for partnerships,” Nathan said. “Though your proposal has been…flattering.” “Oh.” Wano rubbed his neck. “Are you sure? I’d be a great partner.” Nathan nodded. “I’m sure. Can you accept that?” Wano lifted his chin in acceptance. “Should I go?” “No, no… Well, I mean, you should meet the kids,” Nathan suggested. “Come in.” “Oh…” Wano rubbed the back of his neck. “Maybe not. I need to sleep.” “Alright. Well, we’ll catch up later, right?” Nathan said. “Maybe not.” Wano looked down and away. “Oh.” Nathan frowned, realising maybe the rejection had been harder on Wano than he thought. “Listen, I get that this isn’t easy for you, but I still want to be friends if we can be. It just takes time.” “Time is not something I have,” Wano stated. “My appeal hearing is tomorrow.” “To…Tomorrow?” Nathan blanched. “Why didn’t you tell me before? I could’ve helped you prepare!” Wano shrugged uncomfortably and motioned towards the babe in Nathan’s arms. “Right… The birth…” Nathan rubbed Gabriel’s head thinking for a moment. “I’m sure you’ll do fine though. Do you have a counsel?” “My case worker…” Wano stated, though he didn’t appear happy with that. “Well, that’s good. The case workers here are pretty good…” Wano just stayed silent, looking at his feet. Nathan placed a hand on the alien’s shoulder. “…Did you want me to be there?” Wano shook his head. “You shouldn’t want to be. You are a parent now. That is likely more important to you.” “No, well, yes… But I have Dax. He can watch the twins while I’m there. I can be a character witness, if you want that. What is the reasoning behind your removal?” “Criminal record,” Wano said. “It’s stupid… As if punching someone is a crime.” “Yes, it’s called assault,” Nathan said. “It was all the way back from when I got here. A guy looked at me weird. I punched him in the face.” “Yeah, and you don’t see a problem with that?” Nathan asked. “I know now…” Wano crossed his arms. “That kind of staring wouldn’t fly on my planet.” “Well, do you want to go back there or do you want to stay on this planet?” “Of course I want to stay,” Wano huffed. “My planet is hell.” “Then you need to win this appeal,” Nathan said. “And I’m going to help you.” “No, I—” “I know. You don’t want to ask for help. But asking for help doesn’t make you weak,” Nathan said. “In fact, I believe people only grow stronger when we work together. So, come inside.” Nathan took Wano’s arm and brought him into the suite. The alien tensed up nervously, unsure how to react to Nathan’s forceful kindness. Nathan got him to sit down at a table and went to check his calendar. “I don’t have much time since I’m still in wolf cycle, so we’ll try to cram… Dax!” The thunderbird stirred on the bed, rubbing a hand over his face. “Hm?” “I’m sorry, but I need you awake,” Nathan said. “We have company.” “Company?” Dax got himself up into a seated position, leaning tiredly on his arms. He locked eyes with Wano. “Oh. You’re the broccoli guy…” “Broccoli?” Wano scrunched his nose. “Why would you associate me with green vegetation?” “Remember, when you met, we were debating about broccoli and cauliflower,” Nathan explained, getting his laptop with one hand while he continued to nurse Gabriel. The cub just couldn’t be satisfied it seemed. “Dax, I need to help Wano with his deportation appeal tomorrow so I need you to watch the kids.” “Right… I can do that,” Dax said, leaning over and checking on Grace in her bassinet. She was sound asleep for now. “Are you going to the thing?” “Yes. Do you think you can watch them then, too?” Nathan asked. “I know you haven’t been alone with them yet…” Dax gave a thumbs up. “We got this.” “Thank you, Dax.” Dax smiled to him and got up to grab his yoga mat. “You do that teacher thing you do so well and help this guy not get deported.” At the sight of the rolled mat, Wano got defensive. “What are you doing with that?” “I figured I’d get some stretching in before Grace wakes up and Gabriel sucks the last drop out of Nathan,” Dax stated. “Stretching?” Wano frowned. “What combat are you…um…anticipating?” “The battle that is parenthood,” Dax stated. “But actually, yoga is really good for your health. You don’t need to be facing combat simply to want to stretch.” “Well, once we win this appeal, you can teach Wano all about it,” Nathan said. “Wano, I don’t know much about immigration law, but what are you most worried about in this appeal?” “…I guess, just…” Wano licked his tongue. “I don’t like being asked many questions with many eyes watching… It makes me mad.” “Okay, I can help with that,” Nathan said. “I’ve had a lot of kids in my class who are nervous speakers and don’t like getting up in front of the class. And it’s even worse when you’re not prepared for questions. But there’s some strategies we can work with.” Wano nodded. “Okay…” “Alright, let’s get started.” “Thank you…”

#lore #Wano #Nathan #Dax #Gabriel #Grace #werewolf #alien #thunderbird #implied mpreg

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sweethazzababy · 5 years

Text

Not So Professional- Chapter 2

Plot: Y/N gets the job as Harry Styles’s personal assistant. Working for him, she deals with the ups and downs of his career ranging from difficult breakups to music celebrations and everything in between. How will her and Harry’s relationship develop?

CHAPTER 1

A/N: YOU. GUYS. It has been very long since I’ve posted, and I feel so bad for leaving everyone with just one chapter up. Life got in the way lol and I honestly lost inspiration to write. Recently, I’ve been wanting to and I had some of this written already. I can’t promise you I’ll update every week or something, but I want to develop this story. Thanks guys :)

P.S. I apologize for any typos...it’s 1 am as I’m finalizing and posting lmao

Chapter 2

Nervously typing each digit one by one, I anticipate the dreaded phone call with my mother. Her and I never really saw eye for an eye. We have completely different ways of viewing life, which always results in many arguments and pointless bickering. At the youthful age of 18, I had decided to move out after graduation and figure out life for myself. She of course, was absolutely livid. Ever since then, there’s been a lot of unspoken tension and distance. However, I miss her sometimes. She’s my mom, and although we have many differences I constantly wish we didn’t end things the way they ended those years ago. The only times I see her is for holidays, and every blue moon she’ll come to the city for lunch. Other than that, we don’t speak much at all.

But this news is something I have to tell her, especially since I’m going to be traveling the world assisting the world’s biggest heartthrob. Reluctantly, I take a breath and hold the phone up to my ear. Out of an anxious habit I tap my nails against the counter while rolling my ankle as my elbows rest on the granite. It rings a few times, and I start to pray she doesn’t answer. Until the ringing cuts and I hear a sigh.

“Y/N?” She sounds surprised. Shocked that I’m calling her at such a random time. My heart sinks at her tone and I realize how long it’s been. My mouth is dry and my mind is reeling, words jumbling in my head not knowing what to say back.

“Hi Mom. I-uh..I am calling um..because tomorrow there will be a uh, a big change.” I stumble, taking big gulps as I speak. My voice is trembling just a tad, and I know she can feel how nervous I am through the phone.

“What do you mean?” Her volume lowers, her voice timid. My fingers grasping my phone start to ache and I realize how tightly I’m holding it, knuckles turning white.

“I got offered um, a very, very large promotion… One I never expected and uh I was told today, but I’m leaving tomorrow… to London.” My rambling picks up as I speak, just wanting this conversation to be over. My eyes wander the room as I start biting my lip gently waiting for her response. I can tell she’s speechless, not knowing what to say.

“Oh wow…Y/N that’s, that’s amazing.” She breathlessly responds, a hint of pride in her tone. A small smile creeps onto my face, not believing this. She’s happy for me. Never in a million years did I think she would be proud of something I’ve done. She’s been holding a grudge ever since I left, ignoring every accomplishment I’ve had. But this time, she cares. And she’s proud. A few lone tears prick the corners of my eyes. Rolling my eyes at the ridiculousness of my emotions, I wipe them away quickly.

“Thank you Mom…I’ll be assisting Harry Styles. I’ll be…traveling the world. This is something I have dreamed about.” I start getting more comfortable, telling her how excited I am.

The conversation continues on for only a few minutes, but my heart warms at the way it turned out. We said our goodbyes, she wished me luck and to send her pictures of the places I see. She finally sees that I’m successful and doing just fine on my own, even though I left her at such a young age. And that’s all I could have wanted from her.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

It’s about 6:00 now. I’m sitting on my bedroom floor with clothes and other miscellaneous objects scattered all around. Having to leave so last minute is incredibly stressful and I find myself not knowing whether to pack one item over another. Groaning in frustration I decide to get my Bluetooth speaker. Maybe playing some music will make this a little bit more enjoyable. As I’m scrolling through my lists of playlists on Spotify, a thought popped into my head. Rather than choosing one of my playlists I go to the search bar and type in “Harry Styles”.

Curiously scrolling through his 10 songs, I click on the song Only Angel. Immediately a choir blasts through my speaker and it’s almost like a sense of euphoria is washing over me. A little bit of piano comes into play making the beginning even more dreamy. As I’m getting used to the angelic sounds, all of the sudden a shriek of some sort interrupts. My heart feels like it’s about to break from my chest, and I jump from the unanticipated change of sound. What I thought would be a relaxing tune, turns into a rock song. When he starts singing my breath start to hitch in my throat. I’m quick to notice the rasp in his voice, like I’m wanting more and more as he sings so passionately within the first verse.

Open up your eyes, shut your mouth and see That I'm still the only one who's been in love with me I'll guess I'll be getting you stuck in between my teeth And there's nothing I can do about it

The attitude radiating from his lyrics is oddly attractive. I’ll have to admit that this is a lot different than his One Direction stuff, and like it even more. It’s refreshing to see a former boyband member go in a different direction other than pop. It tells me he appreciates really good music that actually uses instruments. I continue to listen to the album as I pack and can’t help but fall in love with his music. Sign Of The Times is a tear jerker. Once the chorus hit me, I felt like I was frozen in time. The production, the raw emotion in his voice, his gorgeous vocals. It all hit me like a bus and the next thing you know, I have tears running down my cheeks.

But then I listened to From the Dining Table. Acoustics so soft and melancholy, his voice so low and quiet. The vulnerability and loneliness I felt from his lyrics took my heart and dropped it to the pit of my stomach. The hopefulness from the bridge as the melody and harmonies pick up that soon turned back into sadness as if all that hope vanished, left me absolutely breathless. The kind of pain he experienced, I hope he never has to go through again, oddly enough. His music makes me feel instantly connected to him, a power not many artists have. He’s an incredible musician, and I’m disappointed in myself for never realizing it earlier. I think back to the picture I was shown and my heart flutters again. With a voice and looks like that, let’s hope his personality is decent too.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Beep…beep…beep. My blaring iPhone alarm disrupts my sleep and my first instinct is to grab it and chuck it across the room so I can fall back into a slumber. I groggily turn over on my stomach shoving the pillow over my head, groaning hoping it would stop on its own as if it’s alive. Having enough of the disrupting noise making my ears bleed, I bring myself to roll on my side and grab my phone from my bedside table. While pressing the stop button I glance at the time. 7:00 AM. I know that it’s not super early, but on days I normally have off I developed a habit of sleeping in till 12. It’s like my body knows what day it is. My plane leaves at 1. I should leave my apartment by 11:45 to get to JFK and give myself some time before my plane boards. These thoughts are running through my head, as I’m trying to have some sort of plan for myself.

Mapping out my day in my head, I reluctantly get up and walk straight to the kitchen starting up my Keurig. Coffee is an absolute essential in the morning, or at any time for that matter. You don’t want to talk to me when I don’t have caffeine in my system. Luna comes trotting into the kitchen, her little legs moving at a fast pace giving me a bark good morning. Smiling, I pick her up in my arms and gently pet the top of her head as she licks my hand. My mom reluctantly agreed to take Luna while I’m away… to my surprise. It’s going to be hard not having her by my side like always.

After eating some breakfast and giving Luna her breakfast as well, I finish up the last of my packing. I throw on an oversized white sweater after my quick shower, feeling comfy for the long plane ride. I pair it with black leggings and throw on my black slip on Vans. Pulling my damp hair back into a French braid and putting on a little bit of makeup, I sigh realizing how soon I’ll be in a whole other country. At this point, it’s already 11:30. Before grabbing all of my bags, I give pick Luna up and cradle her into my arms. Holding her against me, I give a kiss to her head and I hug her a little too tight. My heart sinks at the fact that she has no clue what’s going on and she probably thinks I’ll be coming back after work like I usually do. I left a spare key for my mother so she’ll becoming by in an hour or so to pick her up. Opening my door, I give a last and longing look at my apartment and take a deep breath. Onto a new chapter in my life.

The airport is complete madness. I’ve always hated airports. The smells, the loud noises, people running to make it to their terminal while alsorunning into other people. Many times, I had to dodge myself from another person coming at me full force with a panic-stricken face. It’s about 12:45 so my plane could be boarding any minute. To occupy myself in the time I’ve been here I got myself another cup of coffee and read some magazines. There was an article about Harry Styles actually. Intrigued, I read it wanting to know more about the person I’m going to spend all of my time with. Something about a new fling. This boy is in the tabloids so much I wonder what’s true and what isn’t. No doubt, he’s a lady’s man.

Love on the Weekend, a song by John Mayer is playing through my headphones. The soothing tone of his voice and the calming melody helps keep me sane in the midst of such a fast-pace and crazy environment. Everyone else’s stress, stresses me out. As I’m reading through the magazine I hear the intercom notify us that my plane is now boarding. Grabbing all of my bags in my hands, I make my way onto the plane. London here I come.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

The sudden bump of the airplane wakes me, along with some woman shaking my shoulder to tell me we’ve landed. Squinting my eyes because of the brightness I take a look out my window and see it’s pitch black. Oh. Right. It’s about 1:30 in the morning now.

I make my way off the plane into the UK airport. Jeff mentioned something about a car service coming to pick me up to take me to a hotel. Standing in front of the terminal my eyes are in a frenzy as I frantically look for a sign, anything, to let me know who is here for me. After about a minute of searching, I see a sign that reads “Y/N, Y/L/N”. Letting out a sigh of relief I walk over and shake the man’s hand. I have never had my own personal car service before so I’m pretty star-struck by all of this.

“Good morning Ms. Y/L/N.” The kind man greets me with a pleasant and cheeky grin. I chuckle to myself realizing he said good morning. After all, it is 1am.

“Good morning to you do!” I laugh, feeling a sense of comfort which is good since I’m in a huge country by myself

After exchanging some small talk with my chauffer, we get into the vehicle. Completely forgetting how I’m in Europe, he opens the driver side door which happens to be on the right side rather than the left. Glancing out the window I try and see what’s outside, what London looks like. The blackness of the early morning is preventing me to see nearly anything though.

We finally pull up to the hotel, and I thank the driver while giving him a generous tip. This hotel is absolutely gorgeous. My eyes wander the room in awe. I walk inside with my bags and right away, a bell hop helps me out and gives me a cart to push everything. I walk up to the front desk and give them my name. Jeff also said he already booked about two weeks for me. I can’t be anymore grateful for everything he and his team have provided to make sure I’m comfortable. Eventually I’m going to use my savings and the money I make to pay for it myself and hopefully rent a small apartment here in London. I retrieve my room key and make my way up the elevator towards my room. After getting settled in, I lie in bed on my laptop. I received a few emails from Jeff informing me of the address and time I need to be at the office by. Seeing the time, I decide it’s probably a smart idea to get some sleep and turn off the light, close my eyes, and nervously await the next day.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Stepping foot out of the car, I take a look at the building in front me. It’s quite small, definitely not as big SONY back in the States. I was told this was a casual meeting, so I wore a pair of dark skinny jeans, a nice blouse that shows off a tiny bit of cleavage, and black heels. I tried my best to look good since I am meeting Harry today. I just can’t get his face out of my mind. The way he smirks, his dimples peeking through completely erasing the intimidating look only to make him seem absolutely adorable. Shaking the thoughts from my head, I tell myself that this is a job. Professional.

I walk into the building and meet up with Jeff. Finally meeting him in person, he has dark hair and dark eyes. Scruff on his chin and around his face forming a little bit of a beard. He has a youthful and relaxing glow to him, calming my nerves. There’s no need to feel so uptight

“Ahh finally I meet the famous Y/N!” he gives me a big cheery smile and pulls me into a hug. I let out a giggle and return his hug.

“I can’t believe I’m finally here…it’s so surreal.” I say breathlessly. He smirks, looking down at his feet and clasping his hands together.

“I know but trust me it’s an opportunity you wouldn’t want to miss.” He leads me down the hall and into a room with a few couches and a table. “I figured it would be a little bit more comfortable and casual to meet Harry in a place that isn’t a business room.” He explains to me, shrugging his shoulder.

I feel the sweat on my palms start to kick in and rub them along my jeans. The nerves start to settle in at the thought of meeting Harry. Jeff and I talk a little bit before all of the sudden there is a quick knock on the door. My heart feels like it’s beating outside of my chest, assuming Harry Styles is standing on the other side of that door.

“Yeah!” Jeff yells casually as he scrolls through his phone.

My eyes are peeled on the door when it opens, my teeth gently biting into my bottom lip. Harry walks in with that damn smirk on his face. He’s wearing a plain white t shirt, his tattoos running all along his left arm. My eyes try and keep up with all of them, trying to decipher each one. The swallows on his chest near his collarbones are peeking through the top. His pants are not what I expected from him. They’re black, high-waisted, and are extremely flowy and loose around his legs. I’d be lying to myself if I said I didn’t want a pair, noticing how comfortable they look. He has a pair of black sunglasses on the top of his head, pushing back his locks in the front. Curls are peaking through near his neck, behind his ears. So endearing.

He’s even more lovely in person.

Then finally, he sets eyes on me. His blue-green irises meet with mine and I feel my breath leave my body for a split second. As he’s staring at me, I notice his eyes glance down at my top, setting on the cleavage I’ve shown. He bites his bottom lip as he looks at me, and I can’t help but blush and look down at my feet. This interaction only lasted about 2 seconds, but it felt like it was moving in slow motion. He strides over to me and puts his hand out for me to shake

“Hello. My name is Harry.” The deep and husky tone rumbles through his throat. He speaks at a slower pace and his eyes are even more mesmerizing close up. He gives me a little smile, dimples on full display, crinkles by the corners of his eyes. I grab his hand and return the shake, his palm engulfing my small one. The warmth radiating from his hand is a comfortable one, and it sends shivers down my spine. He has multiple rings on his fingers, something I find very attractive. After shaking hands, I immediately wipe my clammy hands against my legs once more.

“Hi. Y/N Y/L/N, your new personal assistant.” I say with a friendly tone, giving him a smile back. I tuck a loose strand behind my ear shyly. He takes note of it and gives me another smirk, chuckling to himself at my awkwardness.

“Here, have a seat while we chat a bit.” His British accent is a little more obvious this time around. Jeff tells us he has to take a few phone calls and leaves the room. Harry sits opposite of me, resting his elbows on his knees and clasping his hands together. The metal of the rings are glistening in the light, catching my eye. He has a ring shaped as an H and one as an S right next to it. Peering my eyes away, I try not to make my curiosity too obvious. The fact that he has personalized rings like that, makes me wonder how much money he actually has. I can tell he noticed my gaze, a small smirk forming on his face. But he doesn’t acknowledge it and continues with the conversation. We already have a nonverbal understanding of each other and I just met him.

“So, tell me a bit about yourself Y/N. Obviously, we’re going to be workin’ with each other every day, so I figured I could get to know yeh now.” Harry rambles on, clearly unsure of what to say.

“Well, I-uh, I’m from New York City. I originally worked at the SONY headquarters, but obviously I’m not anymore.” Harry jokingly rolls his eyes and laughs at my comment. “Um, I have a dog named Luna, but my mother is taking care of her while I’m gone, and uh yeah.” I finish not really sure what else to say. I’m sure he can feel my awkwardness from here and my cheeks heat up at the thought. Why am I so embarrassing?

“As entertaining as that was, that’s not what I meant.” Harry replies cheekily, a small chuckle leaving his lips. Blushing, I glance down at my shoes wanting to avoid his gaze because of my embarrassment.

“What are some favorite things of yours? Maybe we’ll find common ground or somethin’. I don’t know…like, your favorite ice cream flavor, or favorite movie. Both very important questions f’me if I’m honest.” Harry explains with a playful tone and I struggle to find the answers before I respond. I just feel so overwhelmed at this entire situation, and I think he can feel it too. “I want to get to know Y/N. Not Y/N Y/L/N from SONY.”

Harry looks into my eyes and gives me a comforting smile. He gives off such a calm and collective vibe that suddenly makes me feel a little less overwhelmed. I appreciate that. He makes it easy to talk to him. He raises his eyebrows, waiting for my answer. I giggle at the unprofessional and light-hearted reality of the situation.

“My favorite ice cream would have to be either cookie dough or mint chocolate chip…” Before continuing on I observe his facial expressions. At the mention of cookie dough his eyes light up but right when I mention mint chocolate chip, he scrunches his nose in disgust which makes me giggle. “What, you don’t like mint chocolate chip?”

“Toothpaste doesn’t belong in ice cream.” He quickly insisted.

“I don’t think so either.”

“Then why do yeh like mint chip?” His confusion is so adorable, but I try and keep a straight face.

“Because… it doesn’t taste like toothpaste. Mint and chocolate is such a good combination, you’re really missing out.” The fact that we’re having a serious debate over ice cream is so funny to me, but it makes me excited to work with him.

“Nope, not at all.” He scrunches his nose once more, and my heart flutters at the cuteness. “Okay enough about ice cream, favorite movie?”

“My favorite movie? That’s such a hard one, I mean I love so many movies I can’t pick just one.”

“Sorry love, yeh gotta choose. For my sake.” He light-heartedly says,,

“If I had to choose, oh God this is so embarrassing…the Little Mermaid. It’s been my favorite since I was little and I idolized Ariel” I giggle at my ridiculous answer. I’ve always found it childish and a little bit embarrassing to say that my favorite movie is some animated Disney movie, but it was a huge part of my childhood and I still love it.

“That’s actually quite cute that’s your favorite movie. But idolizing a mermaid? How’d you react when yeh found out they aren’t real?” Harry amusingly banters back. He runs his hand through his hair, lifting his sunglasses as he does so only to put them back on his head. Such a simple gesture, but it has me staring at the way his fingers glide through his locks.

Easing back into a more comfortable position, he rests his arm stretching it along the top of the couch and lifting his leg to rest it across his thigh. His casual form makes me self-conscious about my professional appearance. Harry also seems to be enjoying our conversation, and that eases my subtle nerves. Butterflies form in the pit of my stomach at the sight of him.

“Really? Everyone always makes fun of me for it since I’m 24 and admitting my favorite movie of all time is a fucking princess movie.” Harry chuckles, crinkles by his eyes forming. “I also was devastated when my mom broke the news. 10 year old me was mourning over the fact that mermaids don’t exist. I felt like my whole world was crashing down.” I reply with a grin, a more playful tone in my voice. He lets out a burst of laughter, his smile so wide and contagious it makes me break into a bigger smile.

“I’m curious, what’s your favorite movie?” I switch the roles, asking him. Giving a deep sigh Harry answers.

“The Notebook or Love Actually.” He says hesitantly. My jaw drops a little bit, surprised. His cheeks start to turn a shade of dark pink, expecting my surprised reaction. He lifts his hand and runs his fingers through his hair again, I’m assuming it’s a nervous habit.

“That makes me feel a lot better about my answer.” I joke with a laugh. “I can’t believe the famous Harry Styles’ favorite movie is a rom-com.”

“What can I say, Ryan Gosling is just too irresistible.” He jokes back, his eyes sparkling as we speak. I roll my eyes at the comment, shaking my head at the silliness of the conversation. The ease of our banter doesn’t go unnoticed and I can tell he’s thinking the same thing. It’s like we’ve known each other for years.

“He is, isn’t he?” I sigh, the image of Ryan Gosling in my head. I never expected Harry to be as playful and amusing as he is. The tabloids make him out to be this intimidating popstar, but all I see is a normal guy with a witty attitude.

“Okay so as much as I love this conversation, I have to lay down the procedures and rules of the job.” Harry states, rolling his eyes. Already, I know he’s going to be pretty laid back about it. “I’m not gonna be one of those guys that order you around asking you to fetch me a coffee, or a muffin, or anything ridiculous like that. You’re a friend not an assistant. Just helping me along the way”

His sincerity is something I’m already admiring. Not to mention his complete and utter kindness. For someone so famous, I’m surprised at how humble he appears to be. Jeff walks in as we speak some more, shoving his phone in his pocket.

“How’s it going?” He asks, plopping down next to me. A small smirk is on his face, eyes wandering from me to Harry.

“Great! Should be fun.” Harry replies, but he keeps his eyes on me with a devilish smile, dimples appearing at each corner. Blushing I tuck a stray piece of hair behind my ear.

This is gonna be a ride.

A/N: Again, thank you for your patience! Let me know what you wanna see as I develop this story, I’m open to plot suggestions :) Also, let me know what you think in general, my DMs and requests are always open. Love you guys!!

If you haven’t yet, read Chapter 1 here

#Harry Styles #harry styles stories #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles fanfic #harry styles writing #harry styles one shot #harry styles one shots #harry styles story #harry styles book #harry styles tour #harry styles live on tour #harry styles fluff #harry styles fluffy #harry styles blurb #harry styles blurbs #harry styles fan #harry styles 2019 #harry styles chapter #harry styles lights up

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maybegrammy · 6 years

Text

Euphoria

Summary: Sometimes you’re emotionally exhausted from a dream you can’t remember and all you wanna do is hold Yoongi’s hand. Yoongi doesn’t seem to mind.

Pairing: Female OC x Yoongi

Word Count: 1190

Warnings: nightmares but not really?, cursing (it’s literally one word)

Min Yoongi was having a tough night.

It was nearly 3 in the morning and he was still at the studio working on a beat that had stumped him for days. Being in the music industry meant long days and even longer nights. Having been apart of the music scene for a while now, Yoongi new just how long the nights could get and as the years went by he developed his own ways of getting him through those agonizing hours. At first he did nothing, running purely off of coffee and 2 hour naps, his first year did not go over well. Realizing a decent night of sleep helped his mind process things better be gave himself a limit: 3 days. He would allow himself to go three days without decent sleep (with a nap here and there) but after that his ass was in bed for at least 7 hours.

When he met you, his habits changed drastically. Being the dedicated man he is, he didn’t let his new found relationship deter him from work but the honeymoon phase was no joke. Anyone around Yoongi at the beginning of your relationship could almost physically see the man’s eyes turn into hearts with every text and phone call. No one had to wonder who he was talking to since he always had a smile on his face when it came to you. Working was a little difficult at times, he would get distracted thinking of you, but he managed and at times you even inspired him.

The one thing people might not know about Min Yoongi is his love for hand holding.

The first time you held hands, you were walking to your apartment. The streets were busy with nightlife and a gently breeze was blowing making you shiver slightly. You and Yoongi were in a comfortable silence just enjoying each others’ company when someone from the opposite direction almost collided into you. Yoongi quickly grabbed your arm to get you out of the way before sending the guy a glare and placing his gaze back on you. You were a little stunned but your main attention was on your date’s hand. Hyper aware of Yoongi’s hand on your arm, you tried not to make a big deal about it and you let out a small laugh as you looked up at him.

“Guess he was in a rush, huh?”

Yoongi copied your huff, tilted his head slightly and continued to walk. He went to remove his hand when he felt your arm shift upward. Your hand met his and you entwined your fingers as you stared straight ahead, determined not to make a fool of yourself. Yoongi lowered your hands to lay comfortably side by side and continued to walk forward. However, while you were staring straight ahead, Yoongi was staring at you, mouth slightly agape, heart hammering against his chest.

The walk back to your place seemed to go too fast and Yoongi squeezed your hand softly every once in awhile just to reassure himself that the moment was real.

Since that day, whenever Yoongi was stressed or upset he would do everything in his power to find you and place your hand in his. Sometimes he would tell you what was wrong, sometimes he wouldn’t. Either way you got to hold his hand so you weren’t complaining.

After 6 months of dating, Yoongi realized he was in a better place than he had been years prior. You really drilled it into him the importance of eating and hydrating while he was on one of his music binges. He learned how not taking care of himself not only affected him, but the people around him. He learned how to be happy. That’s not to say that things weren’t bad sometimes. He would still go back to certain habits if things became too much but you were there to help him through it. And he was there to help you.

Yoongi was a silent giver. He would help you by listening to you. He would cook for you which you found utterly endearing. And best of all he held your hand. You aren’t the best with affection but you also seem starved for it which can be confusing. Yoongi’s continuous hand holding is a good middle ground for you and you find comfort in the sweet gesture. Your heart especially warms when you’re the one to initiate it and you can witness Yoongi’s cheeks squish up with joy as he smiles, chest puffed slightly out with an air of ‘yeah that’s my girl and she’s holding my hand.’

Yoongi thought of your moments together as he swiveled in his chair, exhausted from working all day. He turns to face the sofa at the back of his studio, which is currently occupied by a certain someone. You had stopped by earlier to eat with your boyfriend and almost as soon as he went back to work, you were knocked out.

Your body was facing toward the wall so he couldn’t see your face. Unsatisfied with the lack of face time, Yoongi stands up and stretches before making his way over to you. He bends down and moves your body to face him, frowning as he looks upon your face. You had woken up, eyes fluttering and body turning. Yoongi’s chest becomes tight at the tears that were covering your face and he reaches his hand up to wipe away the tears.

With a click of his tongue, he whispers,” Shhh. What’s wrong, huh? What happened?”

To be completely honest you were only half awake and so your brows furrowed as you stared at him confused.

“What?”

“You’re crying.”

You sit up, now fully awake, and rub your hand on your face to find that, yes, you were in fact crying.

“Maybe I had a bad dream?”

“You don’t know?” Now Yoongi was confused, the worry dulling and exasperation slowly making an appearance.

“I don’t know. I’m tired,” you pout at him as you lay back down, feeling even more sleepy than before.

Yoongi lets out a breath before pressing his lips to your cheek, planting multiple kisses without ever lifting his face from yours. Rubbing his head against yours, he shifts himself on the couch beside you. Your both on your sides, facing each other and Yoongi has his hands between his knees. Feeling vulnerable, you grab his hands from his body, your mind exhausted from a dream you can’t remember and your body seeking out the biggest comfort it can think of. You lick your lips and tangle your fingers with his before falling back asleep, failing to see Yoongi’s lovestruck face.

Yoongi was breathing a little harder than before and his heart was beating a little faster. His eyes were wide and and his mouth was open, just like that first night. He moves closer to you, pressing one last kiss to your forehead. As he lays there, holding your hand and closing his eyes, Yoongi feels like he’s on cloud nine. Nothing could ever ruin the euphoria of holding your hand. Not even a bad dream.

***

Notes: my first yoongi imagine! this is inspired by all the blogs i follow that are 100% positive that yoongi is a soft baby that just wants to hold someone’s hand damnit! lol i love yoongi being a big ole softie so i hope y’all like it too

#min yoongi #yoongi #yoongi fanfic #yoongi fanfiction #yoongi imagine #yoongi scenario #yoongi imagines #yoongi scenarios #yoongi x reader #yoongi x you #bts imagines #bts imagine #bts scenario #bts scenarios

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forwhycas · 5 years

Text

Love Thy Neighbor (part 5)

Was just reading through part 4, and wow the spelling mistakes!! I read through this several times so it shouldn’t be as bad, so this chapter is super cute with a little under the table action;) Enjoy ladies and gents!!!!

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It was summer time in England, you had been spending basically all of your free time with the band. Sleep was not even a thing anymore, the boys had you up till dawn then you would stagger into work and come home and do it all over again. Concerts, events, dinners, move premiers, tv interviews. You were inner circle which meant you went to almost everything you could.

“Darling what are you doing the week of your birthday? And don’t lie saying you’re working because I saw your calendar and it says vacation.”

You were out to eat with Freddie and the rest of the boys.

“I was just gonna hang out have a quiet week……why are you looking at me like that?”

He was looking at you with a smirk and bright squinting eyes.

“You like the beach right? I was thinking Sao Paulo?”

“Freddie I don’t know about that.”

Freddie still had that look of “I know something and you don’t” on his face.

“Lacey, were going to be there for a week and we already added you to the flight and everything……..”

John whispered to you.

“You did not.”

“Darling I’m just trying to help you out, your terribly pale and you need some sun, also we all know you love the beach you’ve told us countless times, so what better place to ring in 24! Plus I’m bringing Marry, you two get along well.”

“Freddie I can’t………”

“Yes you can actually, and you will. I will force your tight ass on that plane, or should I get Rog to do that?”

Roger chuckled.

“No please don’t, If I agree, and that’s IF, I want to pay for my own flight and my own room.”

“Oh, darling, everything is already booked, no need to take separate flights, who’s gonna keep dear old Roger entertained on that flight? Certainly not me. It has to be you.”

You chugged your whole beer at this point stressing on how you were going to pay Freddie back for this. The thought of you lounging on the beach sounded so nice. Work had been crazy, your boss was working you extra hard ever since your co worker quit. Doing double the work and trying to keep up with the boys was exhausting. Going to shows, photographing them before and after shows, just being with them was always so tiring since they were always so energetic.

“I see wheels turning in her curly haired head, I think we got her.”

Freddie said excitedly.

“Ok, I’ll go, but only for the view, and because I can’t leave poor Marry alone with you guys for a whole week. No telling the paps where were going, or making a big deal of my birthday, it’s just 24, nothing to fuss about.”

Freddie had a bad habit when he was drunk to call the press and say we were all going to be someplace, all those lights were enough to blind anyone. It made you uncomfortable to be the one people are taking pictures of, you preferred to be behind the lens.

It was the night before you were to leave, sleep did not come easy, you got maybe 2 hours before you heard the pounding of Rogers fists on your door, you jumped up from bed in just a t shirt and un locked the door for him.

“Good morning to you too, excited are we?”

You poured yourself a drink, something you often did now to tolerate Roger’s cockiness. You gulped it down fast. Roger was on your couch looking through your sketch book, invading your privacy per usual.

“I swear English people have no sense of privacy, please do just look through my stuff, have a drink, smoke my whole carton of cigs……”

Roger laughed, which put a slight smile on your face. He came over and kissed you lightly on the lips.

“Calm down…..”

He kissed you a few more times, before you pulled away.

“I don’t like to fly, I’m nervous.”

“Stick with me kid, you’ll be fine.”

“Roger I’m like three years younger than you, please stop with the kid jokes.”

You walked down the hallway to get dressed, for once Roger didn’t follow.

“Ok, I’m ready.”

Roger grabbed your bags, and out the door you went. He was holding your hand all the way to the airport and when you got onto the plane, you downed another drink. Roger sat next to you, immediately intertwining your hand with his and he brought it up to his mouth and kissed your hand. Such a simple act but so needed. You heard a camera click and knew it was Brian, you looked at him and he just winked at you, with a wide smile on his face.

“You’ll do fine love, it’s a long flight, but you’ll sleep through most of it

You yawned as Deaky told you how long you’d be stuck on this plane with 4 guys plus their whole team. You should just sleep, your gonna need it, Freddie will have you at full party mode the whole time. That’s 7 days of full force Freddie in your face.

Your eyes fluttered open and noticed you were covered in a blanket, you moved it off you and straightened up, hearing your back crack.

“How much longer?”

You looked across from you at John, he looked at his watch.

“About 8 hours?”

You smiled in relief knowing that you were almost half way there and got up to get a drink, you decided to sit next to John for the rest of the flight. You were telling him about your first beach trip that you remembered as a child.

“I was about 6 I think and my brother spent the whole day playing catch with my dad, my mom had just gotten me my first camera so I was everywhere taking pictures of everything, mom was reading the whole day under the umbrella.”

John was smiling at you.

“How did the pictures come out?”

“Oh they were trash, I had no sense of angel or lighting back then, the only picture that came out decent was one my mom took, it was of me building a sand castle. I still have that one.”

“I’m sure they weren’t trash! I’m sure they were all lovely.”

“John they were trash.”

“How come you don’t go to the beach more often? If you love it so much.”

John was facing you and reading your face.

“Um, my mom got sick shortly after and I just never wanted to go without her, she always helped me find the best sea shells, and it never really feels right to go without her ya know?”

John frowned, and patted your leg.

“Were gonna find the best sea shells ever, don’t you worry love.”

You let a few tears fall down your face but you smiled when he said that.

“Yea we are! Sorry I’m never really like this when I talk about her.”

Johns hand reached out and wiped the tears away.

“Hey don’t apologize she must have been an amazing woman!”

You took a deep breath and nodded.

“Darling are you ok?”

Freddie asked, he had just sat down across from you.

“My dear what’s going on?”

Brian knew about your mom and how she passed. You had told him one day when you were with him developing some pictures. He must have overheard the conversation you had been having with John, he came up next to you.

“Freddie, she’s fine she just woke up from a nap that’s all.”

Brian was next to you with his hand on your shoulder. You nodded and wanted to cry more. Turning another year older without her here was just never easy.

“What’s going on?”

You turned your head to see Roger.

“Love are you ok?”

His hand cupped your face, you gave him a smile even though you were fighting back tears. Too many emotions. This is so unlike you, normally you just push it aside but you can only do that for so many years. He kissed you lightly on the lips, he’s never done that before in front of the boys, mostly just small gestures of pda.

“Yea I’m fine, it’s just, this plane ride is dragging on, I really need to get on some solid land, ya know?”

You chuckled but you felt a few tears fell, Roger wiped them away. But he didn’t push you any further. You pushed past everyone and found an empty seat and just closed your eyes and took a few breaths and decided to draw. You heard someone sit next to you. It was Brian.

“I heard you and Deaky, I’m sure it’s rough this time of year, but I’m here and now that John knows he’ll be there to talk as well, don’t be sad though, you’re going to have a great time this week! We have a few surprises for you, so keep that chin up love!”

Brian was so cheery you couldn’t help but smile.

“Thanks Bri, I appreciate it. A lot. I think I’m just gonna try to get some more sleep.”

He nodded at you and grabbed a book.

You were awoken when you heard the wheels screech, you smiled knowing you were going to get off this plane soon.

“Look at that, were on solid land!”

Roger interrupted and you smiled at him. You laughed at how excited he looked looking out the tiny window.

2 hours later you entered a villa, with the most beautiful view you have ever seen. Nothing but the ocean, extending for thousands of miles. You were smiling while leaning on the railing of the balcony. All you could do is smile, as you closed your eyes and listened to the waves and the birds squawk.

“Guys come here, you have to look at this!”

They all came out one by one, you told them to close their eyes and just listen.

“Thank you again for letting me tag along for this.”

“Lacey, you should travel with us more often, you’ll get to see views like this every day.”

John spoke.

“Maybe one day.”

“Dear, let me escort you inside the room with the best view of the sea, it’s also the biggest room, so you can fit all the ladies and gentleman you want in their!”

You blushed while Freddie had his hand on the small of your back and lead you to your room. He was not fucking around either, it was huge! A bed that could fit at least 10 people, with a canopy. A full living room set complete with a tv, the bathroom was all white marble, a huge bath tub a walk in shower, and the best part the French doors that led to the balcony.

“All you have to do is open the curtains and the sea is right there, best view, just for you darling.”

You were in shock that you were actually in Sao Paulo, being surrounded by such luxury was not something you were used to, everything in here must cost a fortune, you were so thankful to have friends like these.

“I, I don’t even know how to even begin to thank you guys, I’m super overwhelmed by all of this……”

You kissed Freddie on the cheek, and he returned the gesture but with a little slap on your ass.

“I’m starving, anyone else hungry?”

John spoke, looking at everyone.

“Yea I’m hungry as well now that you mention it!”

Everyone made their way to their rooms to get changed, per Freddie’s request, we all had to put our best ensemble together. You chose a long red strapless dress, very beachy. You sat down on one of the chairs on the balcony and waited for everyone.

“Wow, Lacey you never cease to amaze me”

Roger sat down next you on the long beach chair, his sun glasses low on his nose as he stared at you. You looked at him, long, tight black dress pants, sparkly shoes, and just a black vest on. You reached for the buttons on his vest and un buttoned them.

“You look fantastic as well.”

“I thought I liked you in black but red might be my new favorite color.”

You smiled and got up to lean against the balcony railing, the sun was setting and it was blinding. You need a picture of Roger and the sunset.

“Roger stay there I’ll be right back.”

You walked into your room and came back out with your polaroid. You grabbed the sun glasses off of Rogers face and put them on so you could see what angel you were getting. You pushed him up against the balcony railing.

“Lacey what the fuck are you doing?”

“I’m about to take a fantastic picture, now just look natural…….no, Rog don’t posing just stand there and look at me….. please.”

He put his arms against the railing and smirked at you. His eyes looked next level, the orange and red burnt sky behind him really made his blue eyes pop. That was it, that’s the shot.

“Am I your muse?”

You chuckled at him and gave him his sunglasses back.

“I guess so”

“Alright Lacey give me the camera, it’s your turn.”

You shook your head as to say no, but Roger was persistent, he pushed you up against the railing and just stared at you, then his lips crashed with yours, so needy so hungry. You didn’t even realize he grabbed the camera out of your hands. You pouted when his lips left yours, he smiled and pecked them once more.

“Alright love, no posing, just stand there and look at me.”

He smirked at you, once again stealing your own words.

“Roger I really don’t like people taking photos of me, it’s not my thing.”

“Well love, you’re my muse now…...you’re so beautiful Lacey, please?”

You were blushing, so you stood their same pose as Roger did, expect you smiled the biggest smile you have in a while because Roger was doing the same to you. He took the picture and he immediately put it in his back pocket.

“I’m sorry are we interrupting something? Because we can totally hold off on dinner if you two wanna fuck real quick?”

“Honestly Freddie, fuck off”

Roger said harshly while still looking in your direction.

“No Freddie you’re not interrupting anything, let’s go eat.”

You winked at Roger and grabbed the camera from his hand while you were passing him, he grabbed your other hand and out the 5 of you went.

“Lacey, what are you in the mood for? Steak, salad, pasta, Rogers co…”

Freddie liked to stir up shit so you stopped him before he could.

“Well Freddie, I’m a vegetarian so no steak for me. I’m going with this grilled chicken, and as for Roger, I did not know he was on the menu.”

Rogers hand squeezed your thigh. Your breath hitched in your throat, you definitely needed to have a few drinks to get through this dinner. Rogers hand wanted under your dress, and you were not about to let that happen. You were already flustered by Roger kissing you earlier, and now the thought of his fingers pumping in and out of you was making you flush.

“Darling, are you ok, you look flustered, is dear Roger playing with you?”

Fucking Freddie.

“Freddie I have no idea what your talking about……stop looking at me like that.”

Freddie winked at you then smirked at Roger. Rogers left hand started to gather your dress so he could gain access. He leaned over to your ear.

“I’m gonna do this and you’re not going to make a fucking noise, got it.”

Holy fuck, right here at dinner with the boys around, Freddie is going to catch on if you don’t keep a straight face. But you nodded and unclutched your thighs, spreading them slightly for him, your pushed your chair closer to Roger so his movements wouldn’t be as noticeable.

“So Lacey, Brian tells me you play the piano? You have to play for us.”

You glared at Bri, you told him one night that you used to play when you were younger, but not so much anymore.

“I don’t play as often as I used to.”

Just then Rogers middle finger entered you and you let out a sigh, holy fuck it’s been a while since you’ve had him this close. Then his pointer finger, both of them curling up inside you, your left hand came down and grasped his thigh. Roger laughed as your hand kept gripping his thigh.

“I want you to play something for us tomorrow at rehearsals.”

“If I say yes will you let me finish eating my dinner in peace?”

Rogers thumb now circling your clit.

“I want a whole set of you performing Journey songs, warm up that voice of yours love, I wanna hear it.”

Roger was looking at you square in the face, you needed to distract him, you needed his fingers to stop, you knew that when you did cum it would be messy. You wanted this but not now, not so public.

“Oh no….I don’t sing, I’ll play the piano and Freddie can sing for me.”

You were starting to squirm when Roger added a third finger, how dare he try to have a normal conversation with you while his fingers are inside of you.

“Really, I’d love to hear that sweet American voice of yours sing.”

Rogers fingers slowly going in and out of you, wow you needed relief.

“I’m all good, really!”

Your hand went under the table and stopped Rogers hand, you were done. You needed him inside you not his hands.

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Rog really likes to mess with this poor girl!!! Part 6 tomorrow possibly, if not tomorrow then Wednesday for sure! Please share and like this, I’ve put a lot of time into this:)

#fanfic #roger taylor #queen #smut

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polar-stars · 5 years

Text

Mother-Relationships, Part 2

I present the second part of @smokeprincess24 ask

First part here: https://polar-stars.tumblr.com/post/185757582391/how-is-the-relationship-mother-sondaughter

Miyoko Hojo

With Miyoko as mom, Suzume truly never doubted for even a second that she could become big in the culinary world while being a woman. While defiantly both of Suzu’s parents had their part in building up her confidence, Miyoko’s part was probably a little bit greater. Suzume admires her mother a lot and always wanted to become as strong and brave as her. Miyoko may not brag as loudly over Suzume as Terunori does, but she does never fail to make Suzume know that she is in fact very proud of her. And while Suzume’s constant joke-parades do earn a headshake from Miyoko time to time, there are also quite some jokes that got the usually more composed woman to laugh. (Also honestly these two can totally team up to roast anyone and you should be very afraid, they’re powerful)

Miyoko is also the one person who can make Takayuki calm down within a matter of seconds, by just a simple. “Stop overacting!” Takayuki greatly respects his mother and would rather not do anything that could make her angry. However, Miyoko does make sure to give Suzume and Takayuki equal praise, to not give Takayuki the impression that he’s outshined. She is often the one who will listen to him rant and the one to advice him afterwards while also calming him down.

Miyoko can be a bit stricter, but she loves both her childs a lot.

Nao Mimasaka

Both Nao and her husband do have very strong trust in Ran’s capabilities and do believe she can manage alone. Ran therefore doesn’t gets the same amount of attention that Kazuo and Ayano get, who have a bit more problems than Ran has, but she is fine with it. Her parents do occasionally find the time to bond with Ran alone and make complete use of that. Ran also phones them a lot and updates them on what’s going on on Totsuki. Nao is proud of her oldest and makes sure to let Ran knows about it. Meanwhile Ran loves how eccentric her mother is and gifts her a lot of more unusual gifts to show her. She generally praises her mother a lot and is always in for the activities Nao suggests.

After Ran, Nao is usually the second person to hear all about Kazuo’s most recent love-problems and she is all here for it. She does offer a lot of advice and her own thoughts to the entire situation and just cheers Kazuo on in general. She is also naturally the one to introduce him to all of his more eccentric interests. When he was bullied she was around him almost 24/7, comforting him while also telling him to not listen to any of this and straight up walking into school telling the teacher she will put a spell on them if they don’t act about this situation.

Nao and Ayano mainly bond about their enjoyment for more creepy, weird and spooky things. And while Ayano over times developed an obsession with mainly Victorian Aesthetics and other old-fashioned things with a creepy touch (like you know also old Carnival music for example) or just Alice in Wonderland aesthetics she supported Ayano in her enjoyment despite it not really being her forte. Subaru is the one to buy Ayano her dolls and lolita dresses usually, Nao rather prefers to gift her little more stranger things like an old, rusty scissor or a broken clock. Which Ayano all loves. Nao also comforts Ayano a lot since she knows she’s bullied and is just very protective over her in general. Nao always made sure to tell Ayano that she is lovable the way she is and that others are truly the “mad ones” to not see that.

Urara Kawashima

Urara brags about Hideyoshi and Hideyoshi brags about her. Urara always made sure to educate Hideyoshi about how he’s superior to most people and defiantly is the greatest reason for Hideyoshi’s arrogance. In her mind, she always felt her son is going to be amazing and someone to bow to. And she hates when someone doesn’t give him the credit she believes he deserves. Hideyoshi is insanely proud of his mom and never fails to make her know. He loves spending time with her, except when she is out shopping because that can take hours, a lot of hours. What he loves is just sharing all the gossips of Totsuki he knows with her and hear her commentary on it.

Yua Aoki

No matter how tall Daisuke grows, he will always be her little boy to Yua. Daisuke generally gets lots of hugs and cuddles and praising words from his mother that he’s doing his best. He thinks his mother is very soft and does appreciate her comfort a lot. She is generally the parent, he does turn to when he is sad and just wants to feel a little better. Yua also has no problem in how soft Daisuke is and encourages him no matter what. Meanwhile Daisuke, when growing older does help his father in building up Yua’s confidence whenever she is doubting herself. Much like Hideyoshi, Daisuke does brag about his mother because he’s proud of her.

Mea Kusunoki

Mea and Emi are pretty much a bit like besties. Emi pretty much tells her mother everything, except for her involvement with Shigeo. So Mea is very well informed about Totsuki’s gossips. They also like do a ton of activities together like going to the spa or shopping. Mea brags about her daughter a lot and how pretty she is and how competitive she is. Emi also only has praises for her mother.

Rui Kumai

Itsuki is a little mama’s boy. Rui loves him a lot and is also very proud of him as it was hopefully shown in the actual fanfiction ; 7 ;. She doesn’t brag about him as often as other moms or tells it to him a lot, because it’s Rui. But it’s notable how she smiles a lot more when Itsuki is around him. She is also the one to introduce Itsuki to his edge mostly. Itsuki loves his mom a lot and often buys her a lot of gifts to show her. It hurts him how he keeps his involvement with Shigeo a secret from her, because he can’t stand the thought of her getting disappointed in her boy because of it.

Nene Eizan

The one reason why no member of the Eizan family lit a house on fire yet. The only not-disastrous person in this household, we stan her.

Masashi greatly respects both of his parents and is generally very obedient to them. Masashi has almost blind trust in everything his mother says and advises and just often nods his head. Just like he also violently nods his head, when Nene is onto scolding Shigeo or Kei for something. Masashi picks up a lot of scolds of his mother and as he views himself as the person in charge when his parents are not there uses them on his brothers then. (Ex: Telling Shigeo to wear more layers of clothing when it’s cold outside, telling Kei to watch his language) Masashi is not free from scolds though and when Nene does see him giving unfair treatment she calls him out on it. Nene notices the most that her oldest son is growing a little bit distant sometimes to both of his parents and tries to subtly work on that. Sometimes she kindly ask him to drop the usage of “mother” and “father” for example. Masashi does think of his mother as a very admirable woman who also taught him greatly, given that he specializes in Japanese cuisine. However as I said, he simultaneously does build up a little distance and sometimes treats his parents more like authority although they never truly encourage that.

When it comes to Shigeo, Nene is greatly concerned with his well-being most of the time. Shigeo does have a few unhealthy habits and Nene never fails to call him out on them and do something about it. Shigeo barely sleeps for example and often goes through the day with an overconsumption of coffee. He also has the tendency to not wear enough when it’s cold outside. Or pretends to not be sick when sick, so he can work. Nene has none of any of this. She constantly advises him to sleep more and that too much coffee is unhealthy, she makes sure to wrap a scarf around him when she sees him with none and she does usually quickly notice when he is in fact sick and then it’s just “Bed. Now.” She generally worries quite a bit about Shigeo, for reasons that I can’t go into. Shigeo greatly respects his mother and while some of her more doting behaviors can embarrass him a bit here and there, he still greatly appreciates her and would never be straight up disobedient towards her. As I said once already, if you actually want to piss Shigeo off quickly, insulting his mom is the prime-way to go because then he will actually get violent. He does his best to attempt to show his love for her time to time and the two also bond a lot about the fact to be the only not-hotheads in this house.

Kei more than often declares Nene as his favorite within his family, by saying things like “the only decent person within my family” quite a lot. She is generally the first person he runs to when in need for comfort, like when he saw a horror movie or something and when it’s family bonding time he usually stays the closet around her. Nene is also the person, Kei fights the least with in his family, although they have occasional arguments. Usually about Kei’s unruly behavior that does frustrate Nene a bit sometimes. For example, she majorly dislikes how Kei tends to not leave his room when back home. She doesn’t like having to call for him to come down to eat 5 times because he’s locked up there and sometimes she then just straight up walks into his room and pulls the wire of whatever console he is currently playing his games on. She also constantly remarks on his language and that he should look a bit more presentable when going to formal events. However in comparison to the bickers Kei has with the male members of his family, the bickers he has with Nene are a lot rarer and also short-lived. And Nene wins them all because Kei just respects her a lot as well. Nene does worry a lot about Kei and is growing aggression a lot and does ´try to spent a lot of time with him when her kids are back from school.

Momo Saito

Momo never fails to make Kiyoko know how pretty she is and what a good sense of aesthetics she has. Kiyoko appreciates her mother’s sense of judgement a lot and has great trust in her mothers advices on anything fashion and also how cute the desserts are she makes. Momo spoils her a lot and gives her quite the amount of money each month, so Kiyoko can live out her extravagant prima donna life. Kiyoko often helped out in Momo’s sweet shop when younger discovering her enjoyment for Japanese sweets and mochis there. Kiyoko hugs her stoic mother a lot and tells her how much she loves her while also making her many gifts. She also rants to her occasionally about some incompetences on Totsuki or how Masashi-kun is dense. Momo only patiently listens. (Also Momo has engaged Kiyoko and Masashi already, without the knowledge of like Somei, Etsuya or Nene but in Momo’s mind the two are engaged.)

Momo gets the most informations about what’s going on on Totsuki from Moe though who chats with Momo like a waterfall. To what happened in science class, to how some of the senpais has a loud banter in the hallway once again, to how perfect Shigenyan’s wife fits to Shigenyan and so on and so on. Momo loves how squishy and adorable her middle daughter is and makes complete use of that by dressing Moe up a lot, sometimes with the help of Kiyoko. Moe and Momo generally bond quite a lot about cuteness.

With Yoshiko it can be a bit more complicated. Momo also thinks that her youngest is pretty cute but turns out Yoshiko doesn’t want to hear any of that at all. Sometimes Momo does struggle to accept how boyish Yoshiko turned out and how she refuses to wear dresses and bows and rather takes the jeans anyday. Yoshiko meanwhile can be annoyed by Momo’s immense display of cuteness. However over times Momo learns to accept it and finds more and more value in how strong willed Yoshiko is. Yoshiko does love her mom and for special occasions she might actually put on a dress and lets Momo do her hair and such. The two do love each other but have a bit of banter here and there that does go away though the older Yoshiko gets.

#I left out Hinako for now because I haven't revealed her two oldest children yet ; 7 ; If thats okay #Gofer answering to stuffz

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doctor-who-hears-a-horton · 5 years

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To Live a Better Life (Ten x Rose)

Rating: Teen and up

Chapter: 9/?

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8

Summary: Rose Tyler has been the secretary to the CEO of Gallifrey Inc. for nine years, and she’s ready to move on with her life. But when Mr. Smith proposes something less than practical in lieu of her resignation, what will she say?

Read it on AO3 here!

‘Bad Wolf’ was one of the most beautiful restaurants in the area, and Mr. Smith was being the perfect gentleman, which was also very strange. He made her stay in the car and came around to open the door for her.

“Thank you,” Rose said sheepishly, taking the hand he extended and letting him pull her up. She had a little trouble making eye contact with him, and he took her cue, releasing her hand.

“Ah, Mr. Smith! How good to see you again. It’s been awhile since you’ve graced our doorstep,” the host exclaimed as they entered.

Mr. Smith offered a charming smile. “Well, it had been awhile, I was beginning to develop cravings. This is Rose Tyler, she’ll be joining me this evening,” he gestured to her and she smiled and dipped her head. She filed away the fact that he hadn’t introduced her as his secretary, just as the woman accompanying him. Without her consent, she found herself admiring his efforts and looking at him with slightly new eyes.

“Well, Ms. Tyler, we’re thrilled to have you here as well.” The host beamed at her and she smiled back.

“Thank you.”

Once they were seated, Mr. Smith’s gaze landed quite forcefully on her. “How was your day off?”

She blinked. “It was really good, thanks for asking,” she said, “How was the office without me?”

He smiled, but it looked a little sad. “It was different.” She didn’t know how to respond to that, so she looked down at the menu, immediately panicking over the prices of the options. She blew her cheeks out, nervous to pick something too expensive. She flipped through, looking for something that would be reasonable.

“You can get whatever you want,” he said suddenly.

“What?”

“You can get whatever you want. Don’t worry about the price.” His eyes were eating her alive. “You’ve been helping me for nine years, the least I can do is pay for a nice meal for you.” She watched him for a moment, then suddenly blurted out, “What’s changed? Why are you being like this?” He leaned on the table a bit, his gaze never breaking from hers. “Because, Miss Tyler, being sharp with you will not make you stay. And neither will being kind.”

Well, at least he’d finally understood. She could respect him for that, at least. Maybe if they saw each other on the street they would still be able to be friendly with each other. Not that he was often seen outside of the office that much. She nodded in response to his words, but still felt slightly uncomfortable. She still didn’t feel alright ordering such expensive food.

“Why don’t you choose for me?” She asked. “I don’t know what’s good here.”

He beamed at that, looking very pleased that she trusted him to order for her. “The lobster here is quite good, I haven’t had it in ages. However, the steak is also impeccable. They have several dishes that I find to be lacking, obviously, but there are a few that are good.”

In looking at the menu, Rose didn’t think that any of the options would be ‘lacking’, but Mr. Smith had very specific tastes and was very, very particular about the food he ate. Rose knew that better than anyone.

“Alright, whatever you think,” she said, setting the menu down.

“Would you like a glass of wine?” He asked her.

“No, thank you. Would you like one?” She was used to deferring to him, after all.

He peered over at her. “Not my day off.”

She decided against it, mostly because she didn’t want to not have full control of everything when she was with him. Mr. Smith was quite curt with the staff, letting them know in no uncertain terms who he was. It embarrassed Rose, in a way, but this was how he always was.

Talking was a little awkward, considering how their relationship was strictly professional. Mr. Smith said something though, that finally caught her attention and held it.

“My brother is coming into town for the library opening next month,” he said, “He’ll be doing a reading of his new novel there.”

“Oh?” Rose furrowed her brow. “He’s not on the schedule.”

“I don’t particularly want him to be but… Immovable forces give me no choice.”

“Funny, I don’t think I’ve ever met your brother.”

He scoffed, taking a sip of water. “Believe me, Miss Tyler, that was not an oversight on my part.”

She furrowed her brows a little. “What?”

His eyes went a bit glassy. “He’s not a good man.”

Rose blinked, but took it at face value because she wasn’t sure that pressing the issue at this particular moment was a good idea. “Alright,” she said uncertainty. “I’ll have to put him on the schedule then.” She wanted to ask who his brother was, but part of her knew that the reason Mr. Smith hadn’t said anything was because he didn’t want her to know, and she didn’t want to aggravate him when they were in such close proximity.

Dinner went smoothly, for the most part. He ended up ordering the steak for her, and Rose found that it was absolutely the best steak she’d had in her entire life, and Mr.Smith wasn’t bad conversation in the right context. Perhaps he wasn’t as insufferable as she thought he was.

He drove her home in relative silence, and walked her to her door.

“Thank you for tonight,” she said, wincing at her own words. That made it sound far too much like this was a date. And this most certainly was not a date. He was her boss, and there were numerous other reasons that would not be okay.

“You’re welcome,” He said, and he looked like he was preening a bit. Well, back to his arrogant self it was, then. She supposed she should’ve seen it coming. Just because he’d been decent for the night didn’t mean he was a different man than the one she’d seen the day before at work.the day before. He was still an absolute dod, and would probably continue to be one in the foreseeable future.

“I’ll see you at work tomorrow,” She said, dipping her head and unlocking her door. “I’ll get to sleep early and put your brother on the event schedule tomorrow morning as early as I can.”

“Excellent. Your work is… Outstanding as usual, Miss Tyler.” He said it quietly, almost with a sort of reverence that she’d never really heard from him before.

“Well, thank you. Goodnight, then, Mr. Smith.”

He stood there for a moment longer, staring at her, almost asking her to invite him in. She met his gaze and stared back. She would not be taken down by a man. She didn’t know what he wanted, but with this particular situation, she would assume the worst. Maybe that was wrong, but her upbringing taught her to be careful.

“Goodnight. I’ll… I’ll see you tomorrow.”

He faltered a bit and then nodded harshly before turning back to his car and leaving her standing on her little porch. She watched him drive away and then went inside her flat. She got ready for bed, still feeling as confused as ever, but not having any idea what Mr. Smith’s ultimatum was. He’d been genuinely kind and she’d had a… Well, she’d had a nice time. WIth him.

She shook her head, getting into bed and facing the wall. She was already sick of thinking about it.

********

A knock on Jack’s door made him start, but of course he knew exactly who it was. He rolled his eyes and got up to answer it. “Hello,” he said, looking at John, unamused. “What can I do for you?”

“I believe I took Miss Tyler on a date tonight, and she still seems unsure of my intentions.”

Jack sighed, stepping back from the door and gesturing towards his living room with a grand, sweeping gesture. “Come on in.”

Once Mr. Smith was seated, he started telling his story. “I don’t know what to do. I took her to the most expensive restaurant in the city, I was desperately kind to her. I don’t know what she wants from me!”

“Did you tell her it was a date?” Jack asked wearily.

“What?”

“Oh God, you didn’t, did you?” Jack put his head in his hands. “John, you have to actually tell a woman you want to date her.”

“I haven’t pursued a woman in years!” Mr. Smith cried out. “Ridiculous! Women fall over me all the time, I have to fight them off. But suddenly-”

“Suddenly there’s a woman worth fighting for, boss. That makes all the difference.”

He frowned, but something in Jack told him he knew he was right. Rose actually meant something to John, and that’s why it was so hard for him. And he’d lose her if he wasn’t careful. She already had one foot out the door.

“You think I’m not being forward enough.” “I know you’re not being forward enough.”

Mr. Smith frowned and looked down at his hands. “Hm. Perhaps I should reconsider my methods.”

“You definitely should.”

*****

The next morning, Rose found herself still confused but pushing it all to the side. She hardly had the time to think about Mr. Smith’s weird habits and behaviors. However, she was still confused, and so distracted that she found herself running into a man in the lobby of the building. “Oh!” She cried out, almost dropping her bag.

“Whoa, easy there.” The man she’d run into took her by the elbows, steadying her. He was handsome, all sandy blonde hair and sweet smiles. She found herself smiling back at him without really meaning to.

“Sorry,” She laughed, “Was sort of thinking.”

“No worries. Quite a good start to my day actually.” The man laughed. “Harold Saxon, it’s a pleasure to meet you.” “Rose Tyler.” She took a step back, out of his grasp. “I’ve never seen you in the building before, do you have business with someone?”

“Yes, I’m here to see my brother. John Smith?”

“Oh!” Rose’s eyes widened. “You’re the author!”

He winked at her. “Oh, don’t pretend like you haven’t read my books. Most of the female population has.” “I probably have,” Rose laughed good naturedly. “I could take you up to Mr. SMith, though. I’m his secretary.”

“Funny, he never mentioned having a beautiful secretary,” Mr. Saxon said, almost on a purr, and Rose blushed.

“Well, Mr. Smith isn’t keen on objectification,” Rose smiled pleasantly. “But I’ll take you to him now, he should be in.” She brushed past Mr, Saxon and walked up the flight of stairs to his office, trusting that the man would follow behind her. She eased the heavy door open, signaling for Harold to stay behind. “Good morning, Mr. Smith,’ she said upon opening the door.

“Good morning, Miss Tyler,” He said, removing his glasses and regarding her carefully. “What is it?”

“Your-”

She was cut off by his phone ringing, and he held up his finger before answering. “Hello?” He sounded frustrated, and when the person on the other end of the phone started speaking, he only got more frustrated. “What?!” He said, his voice raising in pitch, “They’re doing what?” He looked at Rose. “We’ll be there.” He hung up the phone and go to his feet. “We need to go.”

“What’s going on?” “Our sweet rival company is opening their media center in two weeks. They’re trying to beat out our library opening. So, we need to go to the library to see what we can do to open it early.”

“Right now?” “Right now.” “Well, alright, but you should know that your brother is here.” Mr. Smith froze, a cool mask of indifference settling over his face. “He spoke to you?” ‘Yes.”

“Put him on the schedule and send him away. We don’t need to speak with him today. Then we can go.”

#to live a better life #ten x rose #tenrose #tenth doctor #rose tyler #tenxrose #tenpetals #ray lu writes fic #raylu ten x rose #raylu writes fic

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parentingtheoryandpractice · 6 years

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Assorted Parenting Updates from a while back

I found this post in my drafts folder and I figured it was worth posting, even though it’s now more than six months out of date.

It's been a while since I wrote any updates about my kids, so I figured I'd try to record some stuff for posterity. The one caveat is that everything is great and I wouldn’t tell you if it wasn’t.

A while back, when I felt like I was staring down a lot of years of parenting, I started asking my friends when things got easier. I mostly got two answers: when your youngest turns 3, and when your youngest turns 5. So now, when I have a 5.5yo and an almost 3yo seems like a particularly appropriate time to reflect.

It really is sort of shocking to me how mature Lydia is. I don’t mean that I think she’s especially mature for her age–more that 5 seems like a shockingly mature age compared to what came before. From the time she was a baby, we did a ton of talking about stuff and explaining stuff, and all that. But at this age she really gets it. Explaining things works. If she doesn’t want to do something, she’s often happy to tell me why, and she’s decent at introspecting, especially if we talk her through it. She seems to accept that there are some things that I will make her do (though I try to keep that to a minimum), and she’ll ask whether I’m forcing her to do something or not. And often she’ll be up for doing it even if I’m not forcing her, even if she doesn’t want to do it, just because I really want her to do it. She recently informed me that she can open all of our child locks, and I was basically just happy about that development.

By my standards, she’s pretty polite :-).

She’s pretty motivated to observe family rules, and she’s also very much tracking that other families have different rules, particularly around toys and sharing. (In our house, lots of the toys belong to one kid or the other, and a minority of the toys are communal.)

She also sometimes tells me when she thinks I haven’t been being fair to her or paying enough attention to her, which always feels comforting. Though I suppose I never know for sure what she isn’t telling me.

It’s definitely a bad bet to assume she isn’t paying attention to stuff that people around her are saying.

Her favorite food is pasta with parmesan cheese.

She loves LOL dolls.

She’s been super into singing, and wants me to help her get all the notes perfect. Her favorite songs are Rose Red, Hey Ho Nobody’s Home, and Ah Poor Bird. Other favorites include Once Upon a December, A Million Dreams, and Let it Go.

She builds a lot with Legos and Duplos, and lately she seems to have more of a plan. Like she’ll specifically round up a bunch of a type of piece she knows she’s going to need.

Socializing is clearly important to her, but she seems to get burned out by it too sometimes. And lately she can actually meaningfully spend a lot of time doing pretend play with Zeke, so there’s that too. She has a lot of strategies for getting him to do what she wants when they play. Playing with our nanny is also one of her top things to do.

She started getting carsick lately :-(, whereas she really didn’t before, which is too bad. A lot of the time it doesn’t happen though, and she is fairly self-aware about her triggers.

She has stuff she likes playing on the iPad, and some Wii and PS4 games she likes, but hasn’t ever really gotten into video games or computer games. She loves playing The Sims on my computer with me, perhaps partly because it’s a bit of scarce activity.

For years now she’s had a pretty steady interest in arithmetic. It’s pretty common for her to spontaneously ask about addition, subtraction, and sometimes a little multiplication. We talk about infinity sometimes.

She’ll ask to practice reading with me and Will, but my sense is that her motivation there is largely about connecting with us. I don’t think it feels real to her that she could actually learn to read.

She loves our dogs, and wants more animals. She periodically mentions wanting a smaller dog and a cat.

She’s definitely still a night owl. Our nanny starts at 9 a few mornings a week, and she’s asked me to wake her up for that, since she doesn’t want to miss out. Otherwise, she’ll wake up anywhere from around 8:30-10:30, and she often goes to sleep around 11:30, though sometimes it’s much earlier if she had a jam-packed day, or if she slept less than usual the night before.

I can definitely imagine what would feel easier about having my youngest child be 5.

Zeke isn’t quite as into trucks and construction as he used to be, but he likes it a lot. He largely likes watching videos about construction, making slime, playing with kinetic sand, making food, factories, and that sort of thing. Overall, I find his taste in videos pretty soothing.

He like digging outside.

He has some interest in just about everything Lydia is interested in, and he really likes it when he gets to play with her and her friends.

He likes to play with words a lot, and repeat rhyming and similar sounding words for fun.

For a long time now, he’s been very good at getting his point across to people, though he’s still definitely at the age where strangers sometimes can’t fully follow his toddler accent.

He’s gotten pretty good at doing pretend play on his own, in addition to liking it with other people, and sometimes Lydia and I get kick out of listening to him babble to himself when he’s playing in the upstairs area by himself.

When playing with Lydia, he’s fairly inclined to grab her things, and still sometimes knocks over her creations or gets in her space. It seems normal to me for an almost 3yo, though of course we do our best to stop him. it also seems more deliberate than it used to, in an almost-3-yo-way instead of in a 2-yo way.

He likes playing with the dogs sometimes, but sometimes doesn’t want them around, and sometimes pokes them sits on them. Again, I do my best to stop him, but the dogs are also fairly skilled at taking care of themselves without hurting the kids, which makes my life easier. He throws balls for Krypto a lot.

Similarly, he’s quite cuddly with me, but there’s often kicking, climbing, and stuff like that mixed in.

He still gets carsick, though I think less than he used to. This month he’s pretty willing to get in cars to go places he wants, but there have been long stretches of time where he wanted nothing to do with cars.

I basically don’t have to remind him to go to the bathroom anymore, and I believe him if he says he doesn’t have to go. The very high degree of reliability without any reminders is fairly recent though. And I do make a point of getting him to pee before bed, since otherwise he’ll sometimes have an accident at night. Mostly he’s been dry at night for years.

He’s still nursing, but he’s pretty accepting when I turn him down, and we don’t do it all that many times a day at this point.

I don’t wear him that much anymore, though sometimes I think it would be better if I did, since I think puts him in a good state. As with Lydia, our wearing wound down a lot around 2, with wearing him while out and about being the last one thing to fade away. He’s around 31 pounds, and I’m out of the habit, so it doesn’t feel easy to have him up for long, even though I am an experienced enough wrapper that it’s pretty ergonomic.

Everyone is still sleeping in the family bed, which is a queen plus twin xl. We have no plans to change that system, since it’s working well for us.

Zeke is also basically a night owl, just a little less so than everyone else in the family. He usually gets up between 8 and 9. I try not to let him nap, but even if he has a maximally late-night-inducing nap (like sleeping from 7-8pm) he’s typically not up later than 1am. Which may seem late, but with Lydia thing could get considerably later when she took a late nap at this age. He’s always had a comparatively robust circadian rhythm, for which we are grateful.

I get what’s easier about having a youngest kid that’s almost 3. He’s not in a particularly cooperative stage, but it’s not intensely physical and hands-on all the time the way it used to be. And when I reflect on how much I do trust him, it’s actually a lot. We were camping for a wedding the other week and I asked him to leave an axe alone. Someone there made a point of showing him the axe and how it wasn’t actually that sharp, which I appreciated, and also expressed skepticism that he would really leave it alone because I told him to. But I didn’t have any real doubt that he would leave it alone. Almost always, when he goes into the kitchen, he closes the baby gate after him both on the way in and on the way out. (The baby gates are so the dogs don’t eat food I sometimes leave on the counter. He’s been able to open and close them for a long time.) I basically trust him to run in front of me on the sidewalk, because he’s been reliable for a long time about not going into the street.

The dogs are doing well. I still spend kind of a lot of time training them, more some days than others. They spend more time outside in the yard than I’d ideally want, mostly to reduce total chaos, but they don’t seem to mind. And I feel better about that situation now that they have each other. Krypto is obviously temperamentally less anxious, but Argos is also obviously better trained. I still don’t have as high a degree of reliability with them around distractions as I would like, but I think we’ll get there eventually.

On my end, maybe the biggest change is that the more years I’ve been doing this, the less I question my overall approach. And when I read articles or books about parenting, I tend to be much more skeptical of what people are trying to sell me. That part feels good! I still think there’s plenty of room for me to get better at things, and I try to, but I also think I’ve come up against a lot of actual constraints, and there isn’t all that much low-hanging fruit anymore.

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