#i try to be funny

[kaybzzart]

"Being the farmer's husband isn't always easy :')"

Inspired by my actual playthrough, almost dying in the mines one day, getting the junimo plush the next day.

(There's like - 3 different coloring styles here. I'm still trying to figure that out ahah)

[crazycatgirl420]

The Fine Print part 1

a dpxdc universe travel fic

Danny was bored. There wasn't much to do as Ghost King of the Infinite Realms. Every Realm of the Infinite in existence were fairly self sufficient. All Danny had to do whatever he wanted, and some official things every few thousand years.

He could see why Dark went mad, boredom does a number on you.

It was boredom that sent Danny digging through old rituals and ancient magic. It was boredom that made it seem like a good idea.

And so, the Ghost King reincarnated himself into a randomly chosen Realm, to live another human-adjacent life.

-

Danny rolled a lollipop between his teeth as he read over the contact. The demon, a minor one who would be lucky if they made any noticeable impact in their own Realm, never mind being noticed in the Infinite Realm, was kneeling on the ground.

"So, my father...John Constantine...sold me to you?" Danny asked. "This whole firstborn son thing,"

"Yes you little whelp-" Danny pulled out the lollipop, stabing the glowing green hard candy against the Demon's neck. they screamed, falling forward onto their hands. Danny shook off his candy, then climbed onto the Demon's back to sit.

"Manners," the six year old said.

The contract was simple. The demon would never impregnate an unwilling body, and in exchange Constantine would abandon his own firstborn son.

"It doesn't stipulate I've been abandoned to you," Danny said. "Just that oh father dearest has abandoned me, which he has fulfilled quite throughly."

Danny was amused, honestly. What a way to find out who his new father is!

"You have no power here," Danny said. "Leave."

And the demon did.

[currently-becoming-potatoes]

*chomps on your bones seductively*

[lyranova]

*A Conversation between Noelle and Asta after having three girls in a row*

Asta: Noelle, we’re not giving up until we have an even amount of boys and girls 😤!

Noelle: Seriously BakAsta 😐?

*They finally have a son*

Asta: Alright! One down, two go 😁!

Noelle: Seriously? *sigh* Please fate, if we have any more children, let them be boys so Asta will finally give up 😭!

*Fate ignores them; and instead they have two more daughters after their son*

Noelle: Asta, I think it’s time to finally give up…fate has deemed you to be a girl dad 😅

Asta: I…I think you’re right Noelle 😔 *for the first time in his life, he gives up*

[thoughtfullyrainynightmare]

Acier Silva: Steel Princess

Nozel: Mercury Eagle

Nebra: Mist Maiden

Solid: Water Serpent

Noelle: Sea Dragon

Papa Silva: Water Noodle

[kalolasfantasyworld]

Nozel's harem

I don't have an art today so I'm posting a doodle I made few months ago after joking with friends 😂

This was before I knew of Helia (@loosesodamarble OC), so please imagine her there 💕

Helena is mine

Selena belongs to @thoughtfullyrainynightmare

Briar belongs to @koneko-pi

[little-lost-canary]

2 buck wild seasons, altered to fit the AU.

[goodandfunnyaccountname]

Its hard out here for people like me (choosing between two of my favourite CDs)

[hffhifjou]

Something I really appreciate about your art is how like cleanly you draw something, and it looks so official, like little hints of realism and just like, professional

And then you give them like a straight line mouth or anime-like crying eyes and IT GETS ME EVERY TIME I JUST BUST OUT LAUGHING AJFJAJAK

Your comedic prowess is 💯👌👌👌

yo….☠️☠️☠️ i try to make it so that it looks effortless but it actually takes a lot of effort. sometimes im like bro you’re trying too hard literally no one thinks you’re funny but like five minutes later im still laughing my ass off giggling kicking my feet at how funny it is that i wrote gaz’ name on his ass like…😭

[in-sufficientdata]

to remember the difference between 'affect' and 'effect' simply bear this in mind: a is for apathy, e is for entropy, the world is ending in fireball explosion in 7 billion years, and nothing matters

especially grammar

[ofduskanddreams]

I just wanted to say a quick thank you to all the lovely folks who left a comment on ch. 18 of What Lies Inside—I've never gotten so many comments on a single chapter before 🥰

It seriously means the world that you took a moment out of your day to tell me that I made you feel something; that I made you smile, cry, laugh, or cackle. That’s why I do this—with the hope that my writing can be a spot of light in someone’s day.

[madame-mongoose]

IM RUNNING ON ALL FOURS LIKE A BEAST ON A HUNT BECAUSE I NEED TO TELL YOU THAG I LOVE YOUR CONTENT AND YOUR HUMOR???? HELLO???? I CHOKE ON MY SPIT, DIE, AND GET RESUSCITATED LIKE THOSE DROWNING MFS FROM CRIMINAL MINDS SEASON 7 EPISODE SIX FROM HOW MUCH IM LAUGHING OK THATS ALL I LOVE YOU AND YOU SHOULD TOO OK BYE

-💪

WHSYHSHSHDSH MY HUMOR??? YOU THINK IM FUNNY???

[chronicparagon]

Hey…Check out Harmony’s new ride!

She going to go wild on the road with this…Until she realizes that she can barely fit and her weight will make the cart drag on the road and the struggling cries of the mechanics doing their best. It will be the most exciting 2 mph that you would ever have!

[currently-becoming-potatoes]

Fellas, is it gay to wear pink? What about using makeup? What about pulling you close to my chest, feeling your warm blood stain my clothes as I beg you to keep living, please, or I shall die with you, and you smile bitterly as you caress the side of my face and tell me that it’s all over, but that I must keep living despite it all so I may tell your story? What about martinis? Are martinis gay, Steve?

[lyranova]

👀😈 @thoughtfullyrainynightmare @loosesodamarble @koneko-pi 🤭

[thoughtfullyrainynightmare]

Wdym you're screwing someone? You insert dick and then you spin like a helicopter?