#i wanna write but my head hurts

[skeletoninthemelonland]

“You shine, and I don’t mean it like ‘a shining star’. You shine like you belong here, with your feet on the ground, if that makes any sense. Your face brights up and it's the most beautiful thing anyone could ever see.”

[opens-up-4-nobody]

She's turning the rain to snow

[crybaby-bkg]

cw: mention of previous abuse, dad Dabi, mom reader, mention of childbirth, angst

new dad touya that doesn’t know how to deal with his son. he’s growing too fast and his smiles are so big, but he’s still not sure how to just be with him.

touya isn’t abusive in the slightest, not like his shit for brains dad. he can acknowledge, after you’ve drilled it into his head on cold nights where you had to hold his quivering cheeks in your hand, that he’s better. that he’s trying. that he’s a great dad.

he doesn’t really believe it. it’s hard to believe that he’s a great dad when his son, still covered in that fresh newborn smell, stares up at him with matching azure blue eyes, the little shit, and he finds it hard to smile back. it’d be easier to smile back if he could guarantee a life with no trauma, with the perfect pair of parents, that he’d love him as much as his tiny little face deserved.

touya can still hear the labor and delivery nurse tell him that he must’ve gotten on your nerves for the baby to look so much like him, and that they’ve never seen a baby that fresh out the womb smile so big at their dad. he hands the little bundle back to you, and glares at the nurse who hands him a tissue. he takes it anyway.

touya loves his son. so goddamn much that it hurts, but, he doesn’t know how to be a dad. and he knows that you don’t know how to be a mom either, that it’s a learning process for the both of you. but he’s so scared—he’s terrified that he’ll fuck up this innocent brat with his ruin. with his scars and history and the want to better but never knowing how to just be.

so he leaves. it’s the day after your sons first birthday that you celebrated together in your home.

you thought everything was okay, that he was starting to get the hang of being a dad. he did everything right, why couldn’t he stay? he sat on the floor with your son and changed his diaper and made him giggle those addicting baby giggles? he carried your son everywhere whenever he cried after being sat down without a single complaint? he helped him open his birthday presents? he didn’t smash the cake in his face, only swiped a little icing on his sons nose to hear that addicting baby giggle? he held your son like he could never let him go?

how could he just go like this? you thought he was finally learning and accepting how to be a dad? what happened?

[dracofeathers]

Calling Fic Writers! Story Idea? -Angst-

If this is already something someone has made, ya'll need to link me ASAP cause its been rotting in my brain all week (if not longer) and I very highly doubt I'd ever be able to write it properly LOL. Art? Maybe...

Please excuse my scatterbrained explanation. I'll probably be adding to this as my little angst-loving brain thinks of more details.

-----

So, after x amount of time, Aziraphale returns/escapes to the bookshop from Heaven and being Supreme Archangel....just completely defeated, dazed, exhausted and just about broken/verge of breakdown. I've pictured the scene with or without his wings. Crowley and Muriel are there (or at least Crowley) and are understandably surprised/confused.

He just collapses in a sobbing heap muttering and crying "I'm sorry" "Please" "You/we can't do this" "Why" "I don't want to fall" among other unintelligible words, but doesn't seem to quite be with it enough to attempt to explain whats going on. Maybe he'd gain very slight, brief clarity upon seeing Crowley (who has also been a mess), keeps apologizing, begging for forgiveness (from him? Her? Both? Maybe) until finally passing out.

Of course Crowley steps up and tries to take care of him, and figure out whats going on. Because no matter how mad he might get at Aziraphale, how hurt he was by the end of S2, he'll always return and help his angel, because he loves him. Also I'm positive Crowley already knows Aziraphale didn't make that choice easily, that he hurt the angel as well. Bountiful soft, care-taking Crowley here because I live for it.

Eventually when Azi is a bit more stable, (as he would often rotate between quiet desolate/defeated shell shock, and near hysterical crying in fear and grief) Crowley gets bits and pieces of what happened out of him.

The "Supreme Archangel" position was merely a sort of placeholder/fake title, not an actual promotion. Because why would they want to actually give Aziraphale that kind of power to potentially use against them and their plans? He was dangerous enough

The Metatron (and other angels) lied/manipulated Aziraphale the whole time to get him to do what he/heaven wanted. And to of course separate him and Crowley. Possible eventual threats towards Crowley and others to keep Azi "in line". Book of life?

Plans of course include the second coming as it was mentioned, but I'm sure there are others mixed in. More apocalypse starting schemes etc. Never really give the full details and kept the real plans secret. Jesus only mentioned, never seen (very suspicious). Azi tries to investigate but keeps getting interrupted or thwarted. Kept a very close eye on.

Much gaslighting/mental and emotional abuse and manipulation, slowly wearing Aziraphale down in order to break and better control him. No erasing/changing of memories cause its over done to me.

God is still MIA and no one knows whats going on with Her. The Metatron says he speaks with Her, but lets face it he can't be trusted. Definitely scheming on his own with others, maybe Hell as well?

Aziraphale never falls of course, I couldn't do that to our precious angel. He'd be traumatized enough anyway.

Aziraphale tries to be a good angel so bad it hurts, wants to believe in Heaven and "The Great Plan" but is only ever hurt and betrayed for all his efforts up there.

I WILL MAKE THESE TWO WILL HAVE A PROPER TALK I SWEAR

--------

I just really love hurt/comfort, angst and them taking loving tender care of each other. They would have a happy ending of course. This is how I cope until season 3, don't judge me xD

Also, what I was listening to during this ramble:

[psychologicalwarclaire]

Snippet of Spider's Web with Strings Attached chapter 24 because my head hurts

Enjoy ✨

[eccentricmoonlight]

I know everyone likes to joke about Shu’s restricted access to social media and how he would be a menace about Valkyrie’s online presence but I also like to imagine him having an alt just to be incredibly defensive of Ra*bits. And specifically ibara finding out about it due to a suspicious number of French death threats sent to Ra*bits haters. Like the whole account is painfully obviously his but the only posts are replies to people saying mean things about Ra*bits. The conspiracy scene for fans in the Enstars universe must be insane.

[tinknevertalks]

Well, that was unsurprising.

[silenthillbunni]

🤧🐀🌧️🌊

[todayisafridaynight]

This might not be anything, but while writing about your fics, the way you have the characters' mannerisms down PERFECTLY got me thinking about mirroring...

There's a lot of it in 7 (Horii is a directorial genius etc etc), most of it more intentional than these probably are, but there's something so interesting about mirroring that takes the tone of a (relatively) fond memory, a familiar gesture, and inverts it in the way shown here.

OH I'M GLAD YOU'VE NOTICED THESE TOO I think I mentioned it months back (or I drafted a post 'bout it but didn't think it was anything noteworthy) but I always really did like how the Arakawa Family mimicked each other's mannerisms (also circling back to how Jo and Masato calling Ichiban 'Ichi' presumably after picking it up from Arakawa)!

Aoki actually does the same sitting gesture too! I went back to double check and skim through the rest of the game's cutscenes, and as far as I could tell unless I skipped a scene, it really is only these three that do this specific pose:

It's such a small detail but I love it immensely and it really does highlight their connections with each other and it drives me insane

[cosmicvaca]

"Cadet... there may be hope for you yet."

[yellowssillysymphs]

Need a moment where Gaty tells Two that Everything's gonna be okay again but this time they say "what about you? how are you feeling?"

[itsbrucey]

Werewolf Darryl getting scratched under the chin and his face held. Tail wagging.

[ohimsummer]

I actually think I’m due for a break soon bc writing does not hit the same anymore :///

[giggly-squiggily]

History has shown Danganronpa chapter 4’s tend to hurt, but surely Rain Code will change that up-

Oops I was wrong 🥲

[twistedappletree]

Ok y’all, I did a dash of zhuiling angst in that last fic and now I need a big happy dose of fluff to wind down bc I’m literally a baby lmfaooo

[tomboyyyaoi]

i much prefer the headcanon that after vash's hair turns black it starts a sort of ageing (though for plants it would be more like a slow deterioration) process that allows him to grow old and settle at some point bc i cannot stomach the idea of him outliving milly and meryl and having to watch them grow old and pass away without him. like literally im just over a big sob from the idea. ive never cried like that over a hypothetical pertaining to media before. actual snotty, wet, ugly tears. oh my god i cant handle that

let me have my fluffy ageing vash, content and relieved with the fact hes going to age and die the same as anyone else would after hes lived through so much pain watching loved ones before wither away and leave him behind. i imagine hed take great pride in his first wrinkle or his hair noticeably greying. i imagine itd make him feel so comfortable, finally feeling like he can have a place nestled comfortably in a community. actually forming connections not just as a protector but as a friend. death, the great equaliser