#i want this in my own apartment someday

[apathyfairy]

will i ever get to live the life i want to live. asking for a friend

[paradoxgavel]

the problem with the game Unpacking is that i love it and playing it is rly relaxing and i love its story and storytelling methods and music and basically everything about it a whole bunch BUT after i finish replaying it i always get that “damn..... wish that were me.....” feeling hardcore

[mytherapistsaidto]

Do you ever just scroll through SH blogs on tumblr while waiting for your Covid tests 15 minutes to be up

It’s awfully odd what my life has become

[thefallofruins]

“𝑨𝑭𝑭𝑰𝑹𝑴”— [𝑹𝒀𝑶𝑴𝑬𝑵 𝑺𝑼𝑲𝑼𝑵𝑨]

Synopsis — being Sukuna’s favourite subjects you to relentless bullying. Sukuna reminds you of your place. As his Queen.

Minors DNI Requested by anon. Part of Sukuna x concubine! reader series

Tw: smut, mentions of multiple orgasms, belly bulging, passing out, violence and bloodshed (it’s Sukuna, duh)

Sukuna is a completely different man the day he sees your tears. Ordinarily, he would have laughed at the sight of a human crying, it seems to annoying pathetic when they do so— a sign of weakness, a sign of helplessness.

But not you, no, none of these rules apply to you. You are exempted from it, he doesn’t know why, but the sight of you crying fills him with rage. Maybe because you were his, his property, his precious concubine.

“T-They said that you’ll… discard me off someday.” You sob. The cruel and neglected concubines, though envious, had spoken the truth. He had done that to a lot of others. They held no meaning to him.

But you? You’ve grown too attached. But how could you not? How could you not when this absolute monster, this terrifying being had given you everything the world hadn’t? Affection, pleasure, love?

He had no value of lives that were of no use to him. If they served him no purpose, they would meet death. But how could he discard you? You, who belongs to him, and rightfully so?

“I hold no such intentions.” His voice is stern, he wants to rip those vile wenches apart for causing you this distress. “You…” he lifts your face, squishing your red hued cheeks “…Are mine. I don’t intend on discarding you for this eternity.”

His voice is a low growl as his grip tightens. “You are mine. For this life and the many more to come.”

He lifts you by your arm using his other hand, crouching down to your height. “Do you understand? Only you have the privilege of having me. Not those insects, and you say I’ll abandon you?”

His fingers play with the obi of your loosely held kimono, eliciting a gasp out of you. He buries his face into the crook of his neck, inhaling your scent. “To abandon you will be an act of utter foolishness, and I am no fool.”

He presses a soft kiss to your neck, followed by another on a lower spot. Your kimono slides off your shoulders and onto the ground below.

“Mine.” He growls into your ear, a hand moving to your breast, fitting perfectly into his hands and he kneads it. His other hand finds your cunt, pressing upon the sensitive nub and causing you to gasp softly.

“M-My lord..”

Your sweet voice only gives him a reason to proceed further, pads of his fingers prodding upon your entrance, your juices slowly flowing onto his fingers and he teases your entrance.

“I have made you the sole object of my pleasure and affection…” he says, hearing your sweet noises as he plays with your clit. “…and you dare insinuate that I will abandon you?”

Your wetness flows down his fingers. He knew exactly where to touch you, something he wouldn’t even try to do to the others.

“I’m sorry, m-my lord..” you speak between soft moans. His words filling you with such great pride. He had so excellently removed the doubts plaguing your mind. “I w-won’t assume such trivial things again—”

He chuckles, slowing down his movements to slow circles around your clit. “Mmh— my lord, p-please forgive me.”

A deep chuckle escapes him again, as he speaks, “that I will. Now lay down.”

Without a moment to waste, you do, skin shining under the pale moonlight as you lay on his bed, legs as he strips off his own clothes, his cock standing hard, drops of precum beaded at the tip. He teases your entrance with it, causing you to groan.

“P-Please, my lord…” you whimper, causing him to chuckle again. “Very well.” He answers your plea, slowly entering your tight cunt that welcomes the entire girth he slowly pushes into you. You gasp as you feel the tip nudge your cervix— he was too big, but you always took him so well.

“So tight.” He groans, slowly bringing himself to thrust in and out of your tight heat. “You’re made for me, aren’t you?”

“Y-Yes, my lord!” Your moan as he fastens in his pace, hands wrapping around his neck. He is merciless in pounding into your cunt, nudging your cervix till your eyes roll back and your nails dig into his skin.

“Look at you.” He chuckles darkly. “You’re truly mine. Taking me so damn well, aren’t you?” Any other would have crumbled under how relentless he is, but you take it so well.

Your moans echo in the chambers as you receive the treatment only his favourite deserves. And by the end of it, you are left in a mess. His cock and loads of cum stuffing your poor cunny full, your moans raspy and he releases load after load into you, his thumb playing with your sensitive nub occasionally, his other hands fondling your breasts and toying with your sore nipples.

You’ve lost count of how many orgasms he had pulled from you, and you don’t know how many more are to come. You simply take it, drool dripping down your cheek, nails dug into his skin, cunt pumped full, and brain numb from pure pleasure.

When he finally does stop, a stream of cum runs down your entrance, loosening the bulge in your tummy from the excess of it. He brushes strands of your hair back with surprising gentleness before he captures your lips with his and parts.

“You truly make a magnificent sight, my Queen.”

Queen. Your heart swarms with a warmth. Eyes pricking with tears. You have so much to say but you’re so incredibly worn out you can barely lift a finger.

“Shhh..” he mutters, sensing a towel between your thighs, cleaning the mess up. Then , covering your bare form with the warm blanket, he kisses your forehead. “Mine. My Queen. For all eternity.”

“Rest now, my Queen.” He leaves you be in the chambers, you want him to stay. To hold you and say it again. And again. To call you his Queen. But for now, he has something more important to attend to.

When he returns, you’ve already passed out from the tiredness. He chuckles softly, kissing your forehead. “My only one.”

Too bad you couldn’t see the sight of his bloodstained kimono or hear the screams of terror. But that was a small price to pay for hurting the Queen of Ryomen Sukuna.

[moncherellie]

𓆩⚝˚‧no room for the holy spirit ♱꙳˚₊‧

a/n: finally it's here! been screaming into the void abt this one for... ever. a thousand thank yous to @thirsting-over-women who proofread this for me :>> my savior actually. if the religious themes offend you (whether you are religious or have trauma) i encourage you not to read, maybe check out my other works instead :D

content/warnings: 4,500 words, preachers daughter!ellie x fem!reader, nsfw, reader wears a skirt, semipublic/car sex, fingering, oral (r receiving), reader's first wlw experience, sexual awakening?, religious motif, christian themes, mild religious guilt throughout, mentions of religious homophobia, internalized homophobia, ellie smokes a lil, she's a bit mean, fuckin in a church parking lot

The pressures of being a teenage girl were hard enough without the pressures of being a gay teenage girl. Being a gay teenage girl was hard enough without the pressures of being the daughter of a fucking preacher. Ellie had never really bought into the whole 'organized religion' thing, ever the skeptic. Even as a puny 8-year-old, she asked why she had to wake up early every Sunday for something she didn't even like doing. Her attitude didn't change much after that, but her parents got stricter and stricter in an attempt to control her sacrilege. She didn't spend much time with her family, instead seeking familial bonds at school, especially with her mechanics teacher, Mr. Miller. But, you know what they say:

Strict parents raise sneaky children.

And it's true. If Ellie's dad knew what she was doing outside the holy walls of the ministry, he'd have an aneurysm and have her exorcised. But, she always thought, what he doesn't know won't hurt him.

You were the opposite. Raised the same as Ellie, you took to religion and fully participated, though mostly out of obligation. Just go every week for an hour and your family will leave you alone. This tactic, for the most part, worked. Your traditional family had their rough moments, specifically when they mocked the outfits you'd wanted to wear to service and called you some... unsavory names. But if you could avoid any similar incident, any clash with authority, you were taking the holy road.

On the outside, you were the purest of people. There was never a bad or dirty thought in your mind. You were a pillar of the community, someone that parents pointed out to their kids. "Be like them," they'd say. Your parents were proud, so you should've been proud. Should've.

You and Ellie had grown up quite close due to being in similar social groups and seeing each other every week at service. Since then, you'd grown apart as you took different paths in life, though you still felt a sense of commitment toward her; So when she cursed out her father in front of the clergy, your eyes widened.

"You fucking dick! You don't know shit about anything! You use all this- this... bullshit- as a crutch so you don't have to own up to your own baggage!"

As she stormed out, you silently move from your spot in the choir, doe eyes shining in the bath of stained glass light, and shuffle up to the front of the room.

"Father, if I may, I would like to go check on your daughter." You're a model fixture, a saint.

"Of course, my child. I hope someday she'll be more like you. I pray that-" You shuffle off again, not wanting to hear about how he wishes his daughter was different. He really wishes his child hid who she was, you think bitterly. You admired Ellie's rebellion, though you'd never say it, and you wished you were as strong as her.

You walk away from the church to the little park you and Ellie used to go to. Your memories flood with nostalgia for simpler times, and you smile to yourself, pleasantly strolling through the large trees and foliage and looking for the rough girl. You find her crouching against a tree, squatting with her head between her legs.

Is she crying?

"... Ellie? Are you alright?" You whisper, not wanting to startle her.

You notice Ellie tense up before quickly standing up and whipping around to face you, a hand behind her back. "Oh! It's... you. Hey. Aren't you s'posed to be inside?"

"Yeah, but I just wanted to check on you. That was intense in there."

"Mhm, I'm good. Just needed some, ah, fresh air. Y'know?" She sounds a little too jolly, weirdly chipper. It's suspicious.

"Uh-huh," you say, unconvinced. "Whatcha got there?" You point to whatever she's trying to conceal.

She knows she's been caught. Her attitude suddenly shifts from faux-innocence to her usual snarky persona as she rolls her eyes, leaning against the tree and revealing what she had. She brings her hand up to her lips. "Nothing."

"Ellie!" You shriek. "You can't do that! Where'd you even get a cigarette?"

She laughs as if you'd said the funniest thing imaginable. "You think this is a cigarette? Are you stupid? No offense. But are you stupid?"

You scoff. "No! I mean, you're smoking it. What else am I supposed to guess?"

"A blunt, idiot. Kush. Mary Jane. Weed. Ma-ri-jua-na." She spells out for you like you're a toddler.

You cross your arms defensively. "Okay, I know what weed is, smart guy. You still shouldn't have it. Where's it from?"

"Stole it. I just wanted to see why people liked it so much. They say it relieves stress, and I think yes." Ellie grins lazily, eyes lidded. "I got another. You want?"

The answer to your question only makes you freak out more. "No! And you stole?! You stole? Oh my goodness, Ellie, you're gonna get us thrown in jail or something!"

Ellie wordlessly watches your breakdown, eyes red and amused, the corner of her mouth turned up. "Relax, man, it's barely illegal. Who's calling the cops for a single gram? Don't be lame like that."

"Lame?" You scoff. "Are you a first grader? Ellie, it's against the law, you could go to prison. And it's not juvie anymore, you're gonna go to real jail!" Your hands flail around wildly as you explain the repercussions of her actions.

"Jail..." She rolls her eyes.

"Yes, jail! That's kinda what happens when you steal something, Ellie!" The high-pitched, prissy tone with which you said her name was starting to annoy her, but the way you looked when flustered was intriguing. Maybe in another context, she'd enjoy hearing her name fall from your lips.

Ellie takes another hit, looking up at you. She tilts her head, asking if you're being serious. "Jail? Over a single blunt? Who cares that much?"

You gasp when you realize: "I'm an accomplice!"

"You're not an accessory just because you're here." She chuckles as the wind blows past and carries her smoke near your head as you duck dramatically and swat away the smoke. She looks at you for a moment, slightly smiling. Her green eyes meet yours briefly before turning her attention back to the joint.

"Why are you using it anyway? It smells rancid."

"Already told you. I wanna know why people do it. It relieves stress and I'm plenty stressed. Plus, I look dope as shit with it, right?" Ellie leans against the tree, and a small part of you wants to say yeah, you do. "You should try it. Maybe get that stick out of your ass."

"You're gonna get addicted."

"God, it's just this once. What are you gonna do, tell my dad?" She chuckles to herself, taking a long drag.

She checks you out, head to toe, examining the flowy fabrics and neat hair and the Mary Jane shoes that drive her crazy. Who wears those? Her gaze returns to meet yours, and she looks utterly dumbfounded by you. Your eyebrows furrow as you see how her expression changes. "What's that look for?"

She shrugs nonchalantly. "I dunno. You're just so robotic. It's like you never think about stepping the teensiest bit out of line. It's creepy. You've never had an independent thought in your life. Have you ever done anything even remotely rebellious?"

You make a noise that seems to say Well why would I? "No! Of course not! And you shouldn't either, I mean look at your dad, he's-"

Her voice raises, a tone you've never heard and don't care to hear again. "-My father? You mean the preacher?" She mocks. "What about him? You don't know anything about my father." Ellie's look hardens, eyes steely and mouth pursed into a thin line. It's a look you've seen maybe twice before, both in much more tense situations. Her voice says that you can't change her mind. You don't care to try. Whatever she's referencing, you believe her.

"Okay. Okay... sorry." You say gently, losing the defensive energy you'd held a moment ago. Ellie sighs and takes an irritated puff. To relax, you think.

"And you always apologize. It's so weird. You need to loosen up a bit." Another long, somehow sarcastic hit. "What's the worst thing you've *ever* done?"

An embarrassing, very private thought crosses your mind. You obviously can't tell her what you think about at night- you're barely able to admit to yourself that you have such impure thoughts. Instead, you shake your head. "Can't- I can't think of anything."

You watch her forest green eyes roll up, then down. It's a very familiar expression on her. "Thought so." She grins up at you, and you look away into the treeline nervously. "Do you wanna try something fun?"

"Is it... illegal?"

"No. Don't worry about that." She motions for you to come closer, so you take a tentative step forward, eyeing her like a wild animal. She hates the way you look at her, making her feel alien. Just because she lives authentically. It makes her want to ruin you, to have you stoop down to her level. Then maybe you won't look at her as if she were extraterrestrial.

You need an attitude adjustment, you need to chill the fuck out, you needed to get fucked, and hard. Ellie thinks she can help you with that.

She grins that toothy smirk as she watches you step closer, taking a puff and placing the blunt between her slender fingers. She doesn't miss the way your eyes trail the two long fingers that hold it. You wonder if she's doing this on purpose.

Ellie backs you up against a tree, and you recognize is as the same old oak that you would climb with her as kids. The branches and bark have left scars on you that Ellie helped you heal. She wonders how they look now.

Your back hits the trunk with an unceremonious thump, and you startle. Ellie keeps walking toward you, now getting uncomfortably close. "Uh- so what are we..." You trail off, thinking she'll explain what she's doing right in your face. She doesn't.

Her arm raises, trapping you between the tree and her body as she studies you. It makes you want to crawl out of your skin, but feels incredibly electric at the same time- it's a sensation you've only felt around her, though you don't know why. She takes another hit and you nervously look away.

She tilts your jaw back to look at her. You have to face her pretty green eyes, unwavering as she stares you down, while you sneak glances just to check if she's still there. Your breath speeds up when she leans closer.

Ellie puts her stupid pink slightly chapped adorable smiling lips near the base of your neck.

"What are you doing?" You say breathlessly. You swear that you feel her ghosting over your skin, so close, yet not as close as you want her. Maybe if you lean in...

Before you can, she breathes out her smoke, lightly trailing her lips down your neck. Her tongue comes out to prod at the skin, tasting you. You whine. The smoke envelops the two of you, and your nose crinkles at the foul smell. You look down to chastise her but she's already looking at you with those eyes and that cheeky look. No matter what you say next to defend yourself, you know you're caught, that Ellie knows she's affected you. It's in your eyes, the way you've seized up so tightly, how you look at her like you can't wait to see what she does next.

She presses a chaste kiss on your collarbone and you crane your neck upward. You're not sure if you're trying to get away or if you're giving her more access. She pulls away and you find yourself leaning forward to try to get her back on you.

"Is that the most rebellious thing you've ever done?" She chuckles, taking another drag and blowing it over you, bathing you in the white haze. "You like being treated like that, huh?"

You shiver. "I don't get it," you say dumbly. You've never been this confused.

"What don't you get? I just think it's fun to make you squirm." She thinks you've had enough and blows her next exhale away from you. "I wanna corrupt you, sweetheart." It sounds derogatory coming from her but you find that you don't mind the tone. The spot Ellie had made contact with feels as if it's burning. You crave for that feeling all over your body.

You stammer over your words, pathetically unable to spit out any sort of coherent reaction to her. Any reaction would be better to tripping over your words. Fed up with trying to sound like a person, you decide to stop talking.

"You enjoyed that huh? Admit it." She inhales and repeats her action. "Makes you feel hot inside."

"What? No- no, are you insane?" The sane part of you is telling you that you shouldn't be doing this, especially not with Ellie fucking Williams of all people. She's everything you aren't- she's rude and snarky and devilish... and tall and strong and hot. Oh shit! The batshit insane part of you is slowly melting the angel on your shoulder, and you can basically see the little devil cackling as you feel yourself straying further from the good girl persona you'd cultivated. You feel your heartbeat in your pants.

Ellie begins to kiss down your neck, sucking and licking at your jaw and collarbone. This time, you're acutely aware that you're actively giving her access to do as she pleases with you. "Maybe I'm insane, but I can tell. You did like it. And if you deny, I'll do it again until you tell the truth."

"Well I didn't, so you can forget about-"

She places her thumb on your lower lip as you start your tirade, effectively shutting you up. "Too late." Ellie leans in and before you know it, her lips are on yours. Her arm snakes around the back of your waist and pulls you as close to her as you've ever been. That warm feeling flushes down your body, leaving chills across your skin. More. All you can think is that you want more. Your hands come up to grip her shoulders, you almost want to push her away, but you find yourself pulling her closer and closer. No room for the Holy Spirit.

Ellie pulls away, smugly looking down at you. "Told you you liked it."

"I didn't say that." You were being a contrarian on purpose at this point. Anything to keep Ellie treating you like this- you wanted to prolong this moment for however long you could. She hoists you up, bringing you out of the park and into the back of the parking lot. She throws you into the backseat of her beaten pickup and crawls atop you with darkened eyes.

You squeal in surprise. "El-lie!"

She continues to kiss you, making you wetter by the second. The heat pooling in your panties is so fucking embarrassing, but you find that you don't care how humiliating this is. You just want more.

"Els, what if someone sees?"

She scoffs as if the idea is preposterous; as if the prospect of getting caught is impossible. "Nobody can see us, and they won't leave until later. Don't stress about it." Ellie bites her lip and it makes your body get hot flushes. "I can do whatever I want to you. But you know what? I think you'd let me. Is that right?"

"...Maybe." Read: Yes, yes, anything! She leans down, placing her hand on the back of your neck and pulling your head closer up towards her. Her hand forces your legs apart further to allow her access. The way she lays on your inner thighs, atop your clothed core, makes you feel lightheaded. You love the way she manhandles you, and it's exactly how you thought she'd be. Every time she adjusts her position, your clit rubs against her and sends jolts of electricity up your body.

"I knew it. You're not as perfect as you try to be. You're dirty."

You want to deny it, you really do, but the evidence is clear. You're disheveled under her, lips swollen from hers, and she's pulling your panties to your ankles and shoving them in her jacket pocket, yet you're ashamed to say that you don't feel an ounce of guilt over it.

Despite how excited you are for whatever is about to happen, you're still incredibly nervous. This is the most physically vulnerable you've ever been with another person, and the fact that you're completely bare under your skirt makes your stomach flip.

Your face must betray your emotions because Ellie momentarily softens. She pulls her hands away from your hips and cups your face, peppering kisses across your cheeks and up to your forehead, making you laugh lightly. "You alright? We can stop."

"No... please don't." Her face lights up.

"Sorry, say that again?" You roll your eyes and she chuckles. "I knew you were like this. Not so pure now, huh?"

"Guess not."

"So you admit it?"

"...Fine. Yes."

Ellie sighs in relief as if her thirst were quenched- that's what she's been wanting to hear from you forever. She could see it in the way you snuck glances at her during mass, finding your wandering, hungry eyes from across the room. She could feel it in the way your hand lingered on her a little too long to be friendly, your touch suspiciously light, like if you touched her any harder you'd start to tremor.

But now, there's no semblance of the timid person you'd been. When Ellie pulls away, your hand comes up to the back of her neck to pull her back in. You're insatiable, and Ellie fucking loves it. She tugs at the bottom of your sweater. "Pull that fucking thing off. Show me those pretty tits." Her breath becomes heavy as you oblige and become needier. "Did you know you were this easy?" She teases.

"What? I'm- I'm not." Everything she says feels designed to evoke the biggest reaction from you. She keeps you on your toes, never letting you get too comfortable. How exciting.

"So it's just for me then?" You don't answer, and it excites Ellie to know that she's right. This reaction is purely for her. Nobody else has seen you like this, and she's grateful to be the one who gets to corrupt you. It really didn't take much effort. "You're so easy to control."

Her hands drift back to your thighs, sliding under your skirt, her lips press to your jawline. Hot breath trails along your neck, down further to your collarbone. Her fingers slide over your inner thighs, sensitive skin rippling as she applies light pressure, testing how reactive you are. You twitch, unwittingly opening your legs more and giving Ellie more access. "You look good like this, though."

Ellie's fingers dig into you, grasping the flesh of your ass and moaning softly into your ear. Her thumbs are on either side of where you desperately need her, and your hips buck up into her, seeking her touch. "Knew you had a nice ass, too."

"Shut up." You mumble.

"Why would I? You like it when I say things like that, don't you? You wouldn't be this drenched if you didn't." She swipes the pad of her thumb over your clit and applies delicious pressure. You nearly cum on the spot.

Is this what you've been missing? This pleasure, this euphoria? Ellie grins at your reaction, drinking in your desperation for her like a succubus. "Aw, sensitive little pussy. Haven't you touched yourself like this before?"

You had, a few times, actually, but it never went this far, deep-rooted guilt gnashing in your stomach and ending the moment before you'd been able to finish. After admitting this, she coos at you. "Poor baby." Her tone is so condescending, but it makes you clench around the tip of her fingers.

She slides the first knuckle of two fingers past your entrance, pumping them in and out painfully slowly. "Ellie, you prick. Come on." She continues her ministrations, gently stroking your entrance, never giving you enough to feel remotely satisfied. She uses this time to take in your disheveled, sweaty appearance. Your cute tits bounce as you shift uncomfortably, waiting for Ellie to please you. A bead of sweat rolls down and she can't help but bring her mouth up to lick at it as it slides over your nipple. Her mouth attaches to you and you sigh, holding her closer by her hair. She grins up at you, making eye contact through her lashes. You can see the tip of her tongue poking out, wetting your bud as the cool air nips at you, making you all the more sensitive. Even now, Ellie still hasn't stopped her teasing below.

"Can't call me a prick then beg for me to fuck you. 's not how it works, pretty girl."

"Then what do you want?" You whine.

Ellie can feel your clit flutter and pulse as she moves. "Fuck, you're so desperate for me, aren't you? I want you to tell me how bad y' want me."

"I- I d-" You begin to protest, being cut off with a squeal as Ellie licks a sloppy stripe up your pussy, finally tasting you.

"Don't bullshit me. If I'm gonna fuck you, I needja to be a little more honest with me. I see how you look at me. You been trying to push some thoughts down, huh?"

It was so humiliating how well she could read you. Whenever her tongue came out of her mouth to take communion, your eyes would be trained on the muscle, breath hitching as she would wink at you. Without fail, you would trail your gaze up her body when Ellie walked in with a suit, her way of dressing nicely for service. Always, always, she could feel the heat radiating off your body as she pulled you closer, not taking her eyes off the pastor speaking.

Your thoughts were impure, sinful, and how embarrassing that Ellie knew. You believed you were hiding it well- obviously not.

"Yeah. Maybe."

Ellie's big hands wrap around your thighs, fingers landing on the sensitive skin near your pussy. She looks up at you and you can feel her hot breath on your clit. It takes everything in Ellie to not eat you out immediately, but your embarrassment is too tempting to pass up.

"Tell me about it. You try to fuck yourself thinkin' of me?"

"I do. I- I tried to, at least. Doesn't work."

"Why not, babe? You're so responsive right now." Her fingers find their place back at your entrance, pushing in as you speak.

"I- oh, shit-" You gasp.

Ellie grins. "Talk to me."

"My fingers aren't good enough."

"Ah," she says, "and mine are?" She knows the answer.

"So good."

Ellie likes that she's made you desperate enough that you've abandoned your pride. She enjoys the flush on your face as you shamelessly admit your secrets to her, the good-girl persona a figment of the past.

She's so busy staring up at how your face contorts in pleasure that she doesn't realize that she hasn't moved her fingers in a hot minute. The teasing is torturous for you.

"Ellie," she hears you whine, "Please!" You rut your hips against her fingers and she feels lightheaded. Jesus fucking Christ.

"Sorry, pretty girl. Got distracted." She smirks. "I'll give you what you want now." Ellie finally moves her fingers, curling them in and out slowly. You groan again and she laughs. "Okay, okay! Sorry." Her face darkens and she bites her lip. "You want me to fuck you? Alright, I'll fuck you."

Ellie's fingers begin to pump inside you, hitting all the spots that make you jump and squirm, and you're sure the rusted heap of a car you're in is about to fall off its chassis. She's going so fast and hard that you're immediately overwhelmed and you don't know where to put your hands. In the span of a minute, they cup your face, a forearm slings over your eyes, and you throw your arms up against the window. Finally, you settle on cupping your cheeks, fingers slit open so you can peer down at Ellie's focus on you.

Her eyes haven't left your pussy since she started. She's absolutely mesmerized by how fucking wet you are, how you seem to suck her fingers back in as she tries to pull out and your body betrays how desperately you want her. Ellie's mouth is slightly agape and she can't help when her tongue flickers out to lick curiously at your clit, wanting to taste you again.

"Fu- fuck!" You yelp, bucking your hips up into her face. Ellie snorts as she watches how you squirm. You can feel something building and though you have an idea of what it is, it's building fast and slightly scaring you. "Wait, Els, hold on a second, something- ah- I think- I think I'm-"

You're nervous about how it creeps up on you so suddenly but you find there isn't time to be self-conscious about it because you cum, and you wonder why God could possibly think that doing this is a sin. How could it be a sin if it felt so right?

You don't know what sound you made or how your face looks, but by the way Ellie looks up at you, it must've been something. Her eyes flicker back down to how your clit pulses as you finish, leaking cum onto her fingers and trailing down her hand. You know what she's fucking thinking because you always do. Before you can form a sentence, she's licking up your cum like it's the best meal she's tasted.

You shudder violently. "Ellie, holy fuck, stop, I'm still sensitive! Oh m- Ellie, come on!" Only when you push her face up does she stop, giving you the cheekiest grin.

You roll your eyes and throw your head back against the car door, panting. The dull ache in your thighs is apparent when you attempt to sit, pulling your panties up and cringing at how your cum pools on them.

Ellie still hasn't said anything. You glance over at her, wondering how she feels about whatever just happened. She's looking down, grey hoodie still pulled up to her elbows, staring at the fingers she'd just fucked you with. She glances up at you, a shit-eating grin spreading across her face. 

“That was hot.” Her hand rubs up and down your thigh, a kind of comfort you’d never received from her. It wasn’t unwelcome.

You don’t quite know how to feel. There are twinges of guilt gnawing at your stomach, that religious guilt creeping in. Had you done something wrong? 

But at the same time, there was a warmth in Ellie’s gaze that made you feel like maybe, it was all worth it. Was it unholy? Almost definitely. But this awakening couldn’t be all bad if she kept looking at you with those soft, fond eyes.

my masterlist...

[blueywrites]

someday I'll get it

eddie munson x fem!reader eddie comforts you when the lingering memory of your ex brings shame with soaked sheets.

3.1k

cw: 18+. toxic ex, feelings of self-doubt, referenced verbal abuse, hurt/comfort, smut, squirting, first time piv with new partner, no y/n, no physical descriptions.

this is for my fellow infps & all the girlies who fall fast and hard. a bit of a departure from the other naughty nights entries - not as filthy, quite a bit more emotional. I really liked writing it! check out the original ask here.

enjoy xx

Two months after you and David broke up, you downloaded Hinge. Your best friend helped you make your profile, and after some careful crafting over brunch mimosas to soften the flaws you saw in your photos and loosen your lips to make you clever in your bio, you were happy with the facsimile of yourself you’d presented to the dating public. The nerves only crept in during the Uber ride back to your apartment. What if no one liked you? What if what David said— that you’d never find someone that cared about you like he did— turned out to be right? You knew, deep down, that David’s idea of ‘care’ was not what you wanted. But as the weeks went by, your hope began to dwindle; your heart shriveled a little more each time a potential connection faltered and died. And though you kept reminding yourself how bad things were with him, how small he made you feel and how little he truly gave you, you couldn’t help the fragment inside you that hissed in a raspy twang:

Maybe I’m all you’re good enough for. Maybe my love is all you really deserve, and without me, you’ll just end up alone.

And then you found Eddie. 

His was the first conversation that lasted longer than a handful of back-and-forth messages, aside from that one rushed first ‘date’ that turned out just to be an attempt to get some dick’s dick wet. Eddie was chatty, maybe a bit excessively so, but you’d take that over the dry single-sentence replies most guys seemed capable of. It was refreshing not to be the one sending double- and triple-texts for once. And he didn’t do it in an anxious way, either, or one that made you feel you weren’t answering quickly enough. It seemed more that he just wanted to talk to you about whatever popped into his head, and that— along with his pretty brown eyes and smile, his lobe piercings and hand tattoos, and that one blurred photo of him playing guitar on some cramped bar stage, looking all sweaty and alive— piqued your interest in a major way.

Eventually, he took you on a first date, which was followed quickly by a second. And after a full month or so of officially seeing one another, now, following an afternoon spent together, you’re in your bed with him— laid out along your sheets, his weight having dipped the mattress beside you enough times that it’s just starting to feel familiar. 

Looking up at Eddie above you, you’re hit again by how sexy he is, sexier than his Hinge profile would’ve suggested, even though that initial photo made your finger pause in the first place. In it, his hair was tied up at the nape of his neck; it’s loose now, hanging around his pale face in loose tangles ‘cause you’d run your fingers through it while he kissed you. His brow was furrowed in concentration, and it is again, except now there’s the pink flush of arousal across his cheeks and a sheen of sweat gleaming off the bulb of his soft nose, visible in the dim light from your lamp. That first time you saw him, Eddie's fingers were wrapped around a tattoo gun, frozen mid-stroke as he carefully etched ink into skin. Now, they’re quite in motion— just as deft and strong, but instead of using them to crawl the needle across the expanse of someone’s back, he’s plunging them into your swollen pussy, winding you up tighter and tighter ‘til you’re writhing on your own sheets.

He’s been at it for a little while now, coaxing your pleasure out with those thrusting fingers and the rough pad of his thumb swiping over your clit. You moan, letting your eyes slip closed as your orgasm starts to rush up, ready to let that wave wash over you before you happily return the favor. But when Eddie presses the heel of his palm firmly into your lower stomach, flicking his thumb faster against your clit as he fingers you, your mounting pleasure twists, thrumming into something more intense. 

Oh, fuck. 

The feeling is ecstasy but beneath it, there’s also panic. Because you know— and dread— what comes next. 

You gasp, choking on the words of warning stuck in your throat, your hand snapping to grip his wrist. You mean to pull it off but you don’t, just clutch him tight in a way he must take as encouragement because he starts to talk you through it. “That’s it, sweetheart, soak my fuckin’ hand—”

It’s inevitable now, so you stop trying to fight it. Like a flipped switch, you release the resistance, leaning into the feeling, which triples in size the moment you do. You seize up, crying out as you cum around Eddie’s fingers— eyelids fluttering, mouth hanging open, the gush of fluid against your inner thighs a secondary sensation to the gut-wrenching orgasm wracking your body. When it subsides, your body feels wrung out in the best way, sunken into the mattress, languid and boneless and like you’re so light you might float away if Eddie wasn’t pressing kisses into your neck like praise.

The peace has to break though. It always does. The second you shift and feel the sodden sheets below you, that familiar shame triggers, quick on the heels of a cruel twang bouncing around your skull. 

You draw your legs up, inadvertently kneeing Eddie in the belly. When he pulls back to look at you, you’re curling into yourself, staring up at him so mournfully his heart must twist ‘cause you can see it written on his face.

He searches your face for a moment. Then Eddie’s eyes widen and his face blanches; you see the concern give way to horror. His adam’s apple bobs on a thick swallow. “A-Are you okay?” Eddie croaks, hovering awkwardly now, seemingly stuck between wanting to reach for you and give you space. “Did I hurt you? Did you not want—?”

He looks sick, but you’re quick to shake your head, feeling even sadder now that you’d made him worry. “No, m’sorry,” you say in a small voice. “I’m so sorry, I’m— I didn’t mean to.” You take a breath that hitches in your chest. “I-I made a mess…”

Instantly, Eddie looks relieved. He even huffs a little disbelieving chuckle. "So? You think I care about a little mess?" he asks, squinting as he tips his head at you, aiming for levity. But his attempt to make light of things can't break through to you— not after all the times you've been here before, cowering in your own cooling puddle as David beat you down with his caustic words, leaving you with bruises on the inside of your ribs. 

When your expression crumples further, any amusement slides off Eddie's face, leaving him utterly somber. Quietly, he says your name. "Are you alright?"

Your mouth works soundlessly for a moment before you find your voice. It feels jagged, like it’s been broken apart and splintered back together. “My ex… he used to get really mad when that happened. Said it was gross, that it was my fault now he’d have to wash the sheets.” An ache rises up your throat, and you avert your eyes. “He’d make me do it and change the bed before I could go to sleep.”

A severe wrinkle forms between Eddie’s brows— confusion, indignation, maybe both. “Wait, but— couldn’t he feel it coming? It feels different inside when a girl’s gonna squirt. Why would he keep doing it if he didn’t want you to?” He’s plain, as direct as he always is, and in the face of such a bald question, you have nothing to reply with but the barest shrug of shoulders weighed heavy under a burden you haven’t yet been able to shed.

When some seconds pass in silence, Eddie realizes you aren’t going to elaborate. He softens. “I’m sorry,” he says quietly. “For what it’s worth, sex is supposed to be messy. And I really wanted to make you feel good. I’m glad I did.”

You can’t see them, but you can feel his fingertips brush against your ankle. When you nudge into the touch, he places a tentative hand on your foot, letting his thumb press into the center just below your toes. He raises his eyebrows, looking something like a puppy dog. “D’you wanna take a break? Can I get you some water?”

You shake your head, then open your hands to him— not quite able to extend your arms out for a hug, feeling too brittle and pathetic to make your wanting so obvious. You find with relief that Eddie is perceptive enough to know what the gesture means. Carefully, he leans over you and plants his palms beside your upper arms, sliding them under to fold you in. When he goes to lower himself in a slant on top of you, you let your knees fall open in a silent invitation instead. You’re very happy you did when, after some mutual shifting and shimmying to make yourselves comfortable, Eddie���s weight slots against you— your collarbone to his chest, his lap held in the cradle of your thighs, your arms wound underneath his to clutch his bare back as he presses you into a comforting embrace.

You focus on the feeling of Eddie on top of you— his belly expanding and contracting against your navel, his heat seeping into you head-to-toe, his herb-musk scent clinging to his shoulder when you tuck your face there, slowly letting him ease you. For a while, you breathe into him like that, letting yourself sink into the intimacy of all his bare skin against yours until the physical sensations swallow up that hissing voice, and it finally falls silent. With a heavy sigh of relief, the last of the lingering tension from the memory of David leaves you. 

Finding you now relaxed, Eddie hums against your hair, a rumble that sounds like satisfaction with himself that he was able to bring you comfort. He untucks one of his hands from beneath you then, shifts his arm along your sheets so his forearm frames your head. You pull your face from his hot skin, letting your head thump back against the mattress as the final surrender to your recovery. 

Eddie’s thumb strokes along your hairline as he looks down at you, his hips cradled by yours, his flagging but still present erection pressed intimately against the crease of your thigh behind his boxers. Quickly, you realize how much easier it was to be embraced like this when he wasn’t looking at you. Under his gaze, you feel exposed, almost too much to bear-- too vulnerable, your soft underbelly revealed for him to sink his teeth into. But he doesn't. Maybe, you think, Eddie never would. Where David had fangs, Eddie's teeth are blunted; capable of damage if he were to try hard enough, but more suited to playful nips, which is all he ever seems to care for anyways, at least for how little long you've known him. He's still new, and you're still learning how it feels for him to see you and decide what he'll do with what he finds. 

It's thrilling and downright scary to let him, but you let him. You blink up at Eddie, deliberately resisting the urge to master your expression and hide from him. Your heart thuds and squirms as he observes you for a long moment, still stroking your forehead with his thumb like you're a skittish rabbit, kept only from fleeing by a gentle, hypnotizing touch. 

After a long moment, Eddie's features ease. One corner of his lips tugs up into a crooked, dimpled smile. "Pretty girl," he murmurs, and something releases inside you. Your hands skate down the hot plain of his back, skimming slowly over its topography-- the elegant jut of his shoulder blades, the solid strength of his lats, the low, curved dip just before the hill of his covered cheeks. Those you spread your fingers over, gently pulling him in closer to you, and you flutter at the shaky breath he exhales over your lips as his shaft presses tighter between your bodies.

"You want to?" he whispers, his eyes flitting between yours. You know what he’s asking. In the month you’ve been together, you’ve done pretty much everything but gone all the way with him. You weren’t waiting for anything in particular, more just a sense that it would feel right to connect with him that way.

You feel that now.

So you respond with a kiss— firm, decisive, one that Eddie opens his mouth instantly to. His tongue finds yours eagerly, slick muscle against slick muscle, and the wet sounds of you meeting and parting have your arousal stirring up into a flurry of excitement and desire. Your fingertips ease beneath the waistband of his boxers, pushing the fabric down to bare him, and you crane your neck to keep kissing him until eventually you can’t reach any lower. Eddie helps you shimmy them off then, his lips falling still as he concentrates on wiggling his hips and kicking his legs to get them down to his ankles. You feel him kick one final time, followed by the faint shlump of fabric hitting the ground before he’s suddenly propped on his elbows and his hands are cupping your cheeks, tilting your face to kiss you so thoroughly it steals your breath away.

And you think— expect, maybe— that now that you’re about to have sex, the energy between you and Eddie will keep escalating until you’re caught up in a rush: both panting, desperate, fervent in your need for completion. But it doesn’t happen like that. Instead, your kisses slow, turning into lingering, open-mouthed presses, a sensual ebb and flow of lips and tongue and teeth— deep, savoring, as if the pleasure of what you’ll both feel when he joins with you is so certain, there’s no need to hurry it along. You raise your knee to open yourself up, and with a nudge of Eddie’s narrow hips, his shaft nestles into the slick wetness between your puffy lips. You press up to meet him, grinding slowly in time with your kisses until your abundant arousal coats him thoroughly, easing the way for you to reach down and guide his tip to catch at your entrance. And when you lift your legs, joining your ankles at the back of his thighs, you feel Eddie enter you for the first time.

There’s no resistance. It’s just a slip, a glide, and an exquisite stretch as he sinks inside, splitting you with his thickness. Eddie moans low as his cockhead meets the deepest part of you. It’s a gravelly sound, one that rumbles against your breasts when you twine your limbs tighter around him, already covetous of the feeling of him touching every bit of you he possibly can. Your pussy flexes and flutters, testing the welcome intrusion, preening when she elicits an answering twitch from his length before he draws just slightly back and rocks in again. You sigh softly, smiling as your eyes slip closed when you feel Eddie’s curved lips press to your temple. 

The rhythm you find together is natural, if rather shallow— shallow because your hands are clutching at his back and his arms are wrapped tight around you, keeping you close as can be. He can’t pull even halfway out; his hips rock in the barest gap that remains as if neither of you can stand even that much distance. There’s no lack of enthusiasm, though, no lack of passion as he pushes in so tight that the pressure has your swollen clit jolting with a delicious spark on every thrust. The heat between you grows, turning you sticky and damp with sweat down the length of your bodies. The pleasure grows too, quickly for you with all the stimulation until you’re panting against his shoulder. It grows unimpeded until Eddie nestles his face down further toward you, inadvertently feeding you a mouthful of his hair.

You turn your cheek and try to spit it out, but the thick, dry strands stick stubbornly to your lips until you have to enlist his help. "Your hair's everywhere, Eddie,” you murmur, more amused than anything.

"Ah, shit.” You have to hide a smile against his jaw at how put out he sounds. “Sorry." He tries to shake it away from you, craning his neck back but unwilling to stop embracing you.

"S' okay." Gently, you extract your arms from under his, huffing a little chuckle at the tiny whine of protest that rumbles in his throat. He props himself up so you can carefully clear his face: nudging his bangs out of his eyes, then pushing back the bulk of his curls, tucking them tenderly behind his ears. 

"There," you say, sweet and warm, your smile growing at the way the hair almost springs right out again. Unable to be contained, a lot like Eddie. 

A lot like the way you feel about him. 

"I love your hair," you tell him suddenly, your heart twisting at the way he lights up in response. Eddie rubs the very tip of his nose against yours, smiling boyish and wide, and emotion wells up inside you-- potent and poignant like the sting of happy tears, sweet like coming home and tender like a bruise all at once. 

And it’s like the second you say it, you can’t stop thinking about what words really want to spring from your lips. But it's too soon, far too soon, so you cup his face, draw your thumb along his cheek, and kiss him instead, keeping yourself occupied so those words will stay inside.

You kiss him until he’s moving steadily within you again; kiss him until you’re squirming beneath him, whining into his mouth. Kiss him as he drives you over the edge of bliss and then follows you, groaning when he throbs and spills inside. You kiss Eddie until the pleasure fades into contentment, until you both are sated, until those kisses gradually slow and gentle and turn to chaste presses of swollen, love-bitten lips.

Your mouths finally part. And when you see the way Eddie’s looking at you— the curl at the corner of his lips, the subtle tilt of his brow, the warmth in his deep brown eyes— you remember what David told you before you made him leave.

You’ll never find someone who cares about you the way I do.

You knew he was wrong then. But now, you know it.

[qaxqxd]

Miguel O’Hara with an s/o who is on they’re period but gets super cuddly because of the headaches and cramps?

Warmth

♡Pair: Miguel O’hara x f!reader Genre: Fluff Warning: nothing bad,  just fluff :) A/n: AAAA I love this idea. It's a little short, but thank you for requesting this. Summary: You're on your period and you wanted to cuddle with Miguel.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was morning, the sun was seeping through the blinds. You woke up feeling a unbearable sharp pain in your lower stomach. Walking to the restroom, seeing blood on your underwear.

“Shit.” You cursed, as you felt a headache coming through.You were on your period.

Great.

Cleaning yourself up, and putting on a pad. To walk back to the bedroom, laying down on your bed. You mumbled in pain. As you decide to call in from work today. You notify the watch. You were aching from your stomach. 

You had your phone and watch turned off. You tried to fall back to sleep, hoping the pain would go away.

-

Miguel found it weird that you weren’t at work today. He knew you called in sick, but as you weren’t picking up any of his calls. He even asked Lyla to see if you were okay over the watch, but you had it turned off. He started to get a bit worried. As he paced around the platform and looking at other missions that he sent Spider-mans to.

 Lost in thought Miguel didn’t even realize that Jess was right behind him.

“You okay there?” She asked him.

Miguel flinched a bit, looking over his shoulder to who the voice was. As he noticed it was Jess.

“I’m- just a little worried. (Y/n) hasn’t answered any of my calls or texts. She called in sick, but I don’t know. Something just doesn’t feel right.” Miguel pinches the bridge of his nose, frowning. He was very worried for you.

“She’s probably fine. Have you checked on her yet? As in person?” Jess bridges her arms together. Miguel shook his head. As she sighed.

“I can take over for a bit if you’ll like.” She offers him.Miguel found it weird that you weren’t at work today. He knew you called in sick, but as you weren’t picking up any of his calls. He even asked Lyla to see if you were okay over the watch, but you had it turned off. He started to get a bit worried. As he paced around the platform and looking at other missions that he sent Spider-mans to.

 Lost in thought Miguel didn’t even realize that Jess was right behind him.

“You okay there?” She asked him.

“Yeah, sure. I’ll be back.” He said with haste, opening a portal to (Y/n)’s Earth. As he left, Jess let out a small giggle. As (Y/n) texted her earlier letting her know everything was alright. She knew you just wanted him to be with him, and she was happy to help you success with that.

Miguel needed a break either way.

-

As the sun seems to set on your Earth. Miguel arrived at your apartment, he had his own key to your apartment. You knew it’d be handy someday. Opening your door to your apartment.

“(Y/n)?” He questioned if you were home even.

“In here.” You drag out the word ‘here’. As you sounded tired. He walked into your room.

“Are you alright, mi amor?” He sat on the side of your bed, stroking your face. As you nodded at his question, you sat up a little bit, wrapping your arms around his neck.

“It’s just that I'm on my period.” You mumble, laying your head on his shoulder.

“Ah, do you want any sweets or anything by chance, mi vida?” He asked, a little worried. He was glad you weren’t actually hurt, or in trouble. You shook your head, as really all you wanted was to be close to him.

“Could you stay for a bit, Love?” You looked at him, hoping he would say yes. As his small smile confirmed that he’d stay.

“Of course I'll stay for a bit, mi querida. I want to take care of you.” Miguel cups your face, laying a kiss on the crown of your head.

And he did just that. He made sure you had everything you needed. Holding you close to him, knowing you’re feeling super cuddly. You both watched movies with each other. As you snuggle closer to him.

You spend the rest of the day with Miguel. He got you treats even though you said it was fine. You were just glad you had him around you, and you were able to cuddle against him. This was a side most people wouldn’t see from Miguel, but he was just happy to be with you.

As you two rested on each other. Cuddling with each other. Eventually falling asleep on each other.

-

WC. 0.7k

[vixenfoxpup]

I need more dca fics to read, not just because they're all so cool and special and unique-

I want to collect their y/n's in my pocket, and bring back the y/nverse. All of them in a lil pocket dimension (the dca stay in their respective stories, this place is reserved for the self inserts and side characters/family to interact. The boys can have their own pocket dimension)

The y/ns live on the same street or apartment complex, being bunched into groups that are roomies

For example. Bamsara's Solar Lunacy y/n, Paper-Lilypie's CCRT y/n, and bones-of-a-rabbit's staffbot y/n. SB is there so CCRT can perform routine maintenance, plus CCRT can be a but messy, plus they could help clean up after ccrt's kids. SL is where, you may ask? Their room has been vacant for some time, but CCRT and SB keep it clean and regularly dusted, out of respect. They don't know if or when their friend will return, but they'll be welcome at any time.

Naffeclipse's y/ns share a suite, probably.

spadillelicious's LDR y/n could stay with saltciphblr's lovebug au y/n

Again, I need to read more to get a better feel of the different wonderful y/n's

This probably won't be uploaded, maybe someday, but this is mostly self indulgence that my brain has been blasting on repeat all day

Into the y/nverse, I raise you from the depths

[writemekpop]

Cold Feet | Mark Lee

Summary: With just one week to go, you call off the wedding. You’ve just realised that you know nothing about your fiancé.

Genre: Angst, established relationship AU

Word count: >1k

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK

You stood outside Mark’s door, shivering. Icy rain was slamming down, drenching you, but you didn’t care. You just needed to see your boyfriend.

“Come on, open up!” you cried, banging on the door again.

The door swung open. Mark was standing there, in nothing but his grey pyjama bottoms, rubbing his eyes sleepily. His dark hair was splayed out in all directions.

“Y/n, whatchu doin’ out here? It’s three in the morning.” Mark said. He stood to the side, ushering you in. “Come inside, you’re soaked.”

You shook your head, ignoring his outstretched hand. “We’re getting married in a week!”

Mark smiled. “I know. Baby, wedding planning is all we’ve been doin’ for months.”

“No, you don’t get it. Mark, we’re supposed to be getting married, but… but… we can’t!”

Mark frowned. “Why not?”

“Because we don’t know anything about each other!” Tears slid down your cheeks, mixing with the rain.

“What are you talking about, Y/n? Of course we do,” he said softly.

“No we don’t. We’re making a huge mistake!”

“Please just come inside so we can talk about this properly.”

You followed Mark into his apartment. He handed you a towel and one of his spiderman T shirts.

“Put this on, you’re gonna catch a cold,” he said.

Your heart twinged at Mark’s kindness. You got changed out of your clothes and sat on Mark’s bed, wearing his T shirt that smelled just like him. You gulped.

Mark rubbed his neck. “Y/n, this is just pre-wedding jitters. Freaking out in the middle of the night ain’t helpin’ anyone. Can we just talk in the morning?”

“You’re not listening to me! Mark, we’ve been dating for a year, but we haven’t talked about anything important. I mean… where are we going to live once we get married? One of us is going to have to give up their apartment, but who?”

Mark stared at you in silence. You went on.

“We’ve never talked about whether we want kids, or if we’re gonna send them to private school or not. Whose family are we going to visit on the holidays? And what about money?”

Mark shook his head. “Y/n, I don’t care about all that stuff. All I know is that I love you, and that I wanna be with you for the rest of my life.”

Mark touched your arm gently, but you shook him off.

“All that stuff, Mark, is our entire life,” you spat. “Love isn’t enough.”

The temperature in the room fell to zero.

“Do you not love me?” Mark asked, voice small.

“I do, but Mark, what even is love? We don’t live together, we’ve never been on holiday together, heck, we’ve never even had sex!”

Mark gulped; eyes glued to the floor. “I thought you said you were okay with that…”

You sighed. “Mark, don’t you get it? We’re rushing into this lifelong commitment when we’ve barely thought it though. I should never have… said yes when you proposed.”

“Are you saying you don’t wanna marry me next week?”

You let out a shaky breath. “Not next week… but maybe someday?”

“I have never doubted us, Y/n.” Mark stood up, stuffed a pillow under his arm, and walked towards the door.

“Where are you going?”

“To sleep on the couch,” Mark said, rubbing his eyes.

“But this is your apartment…” you said.

Mark groaned. “Fine, you sleep on the couch! Actually, why don’t you go back to your own apartment!”

“Mark, I-“

“Why are you sabotaging our wedding like this, Y/n? You should have talked to me earlier, instead of waiting till the week before our wedding. You’re being so… selfish.”

“I’m sorry,” you said, tears beginning to fall again.

“Go home, Y/n. I can’t be with you right now.” Mark pushed you out of the bedroom and slammed the door shut. The lock clicked.

You looked around Mark’s living room. There were pictures of the two of you on every surface. You felt sick.

You sobbed the entire way home in the taxi. When you got inside your apartment, you flopped onto your bed, not even bothering to take off your shoes. You had just pushed a good man away. What had you done?

---

The next morning you were awoken by a thumping on the door. You jolted out of bed, head throbbing from crying so much.

Could it be…? You tried not to let yourself hope as you ran to the door and pulled it open.

Yes! It was Mark, looking adorable and tired with his circle glasses and stubble.

“Mark, what are you doing here?”

“I think we should move into your apartment,” Mark said.

You raised your brows. “What?”

“Yours is bigger, so it just makes sense,” Mark said. “And I do want kids, but no more than three. I’d wanna send them to private school if we can afford it. Let’s go to your folks for the holidays, and for money? We can figure it out together.”

You sighed. “Oh, Marky.”

Mark took your hand in his and pressed a kiss to your palm. “I’m sorry for gettin’ mad last night, Y/n. Everything you said was totally reasonable. We… need to talk about this kinda stuff before rushing into anything.”

You sighed.

Mark looked at you, brown eyes glassy. “We can postpone the wedding if that’s what you want. We don’t even have to get married. But, please, I need you in my life.”  

You pulled Mark into a tight hug, too overwhelmed to speak. You breathed in his familiar peach shampoo smell, and basked in the warmth of his body.

“How was I lucky enough to find you?” you whispered; face buried in his neck. “I must have done something amazing in a past life. Saved a bunch of orphans from a burning building or something.”

Mark snorted.

You were beaming as you pulled him into your apartment, shutting the door behind you.

“I want to kiss my man, but I don’t wanna give the neighbours a show,” you said, smirking.

Mark just smiled, and leaned in to kiss you. His lips were eager, and his hands roamed your hips. You could feel his tongue against yours, sending shivers down your spine. You pushed your hands into his hair and kissed him back, hard.

When you pulled away, you were both panting.

Mark leant his forehead against yours. His eyes were closed.

“There was one more thing I wanted to talk about… about what you said last night,” Mark whispered.

“What is it?”

“The fact that we’ve never… you know…” Mark bit his lip.

You pulled away to look your boyfriend in the eye. You cupped his cheek. “Baby, I’m fine with that. You said you wanted to wait till marriage, and… I respect that.”

Mark’s fingers were toying with the hem of your blouse. “Are you sure you’re going to be able to resist me for that long?” His pink lips were pushed out in a smirk.

You giggled, wrapping your hands around his broad shoulders. “It’s true, you are irresistible. It’s going to be torture.”

You dragged out the last word, pressing an open-mouthed kiss to Mark’s neck. He shuddered with pleasure.

“It’ll be worth the wait,” Mark said, his eyes slipping shut.

“Don’t I know it.” 

—

MASTERLIST

Let us know what you thought in the comments or on anon! 💋

[friendlifyre]

'weekends and hanging out always turns to shit' yeah it does doesnt it

[greed-the-dorkalicious]

One of the most frustrating things about being aromantic is the way without fail, every single time I say I'm never going to get married, I'm always met with some variation of "you'll change your mind". Every. Single. Time. No matter who I'm talking to, no matter how pro-LGBTQ+ or how feminist they claim to be, the idea of me not getting married is simply not a possibility in their minds, and they have to insist on telling me that it's not.

And this might not seem like a big deal, and like... Yeah, I will admit there's a lot worse things that I could be experiencing. But the thing is that 1. after a lifetime of dealing with this, it wears you down and 2. this isn't even exclusively an aromantic issue.

I mean most of the time I don't even tell people I'm aro. Sometimes they back down if I do (after yknow, explaining what that even means), but not always. (I distinctly remember an incident where someone was getting on my case about it, and my mentor kindly stepped in and was like "You know my son is gay, and there's a lot of people who would insist that surely someday he'll fall in love with a woman, but we know that's not a nice thing to say. Why say something like that about aromantics?") Point is, though, they say this shit without knowing my orientation. Which means they'd say it to anyone.

Shouldn't everyone have the right to define their own lives and desires? There's plenty of reasons someone might not want to get married. Why is this seen as unacceptable? Why don't you trust people's knowledge of themselves? And it's not a maturity thing, either- I'm 25, and I've known aros well into their 30s who still get told this. Not that it's a nice thing to say to a younger person either.

Like, imagine if your coworkers were talking about their dogs, and they asked you about yours, and you said you don't have one. So you say you don't, and they ask what kind of dog you will have, and you say you're not going to get a dog, and they all go "Oh, I used to say the same thing when I was your age! You'll change your mind! One day you'll just find that special pup and blah blah blah" and no matter what variation you tell them of I don't want a dog, I'm just not a dog person, I'm allergic to dogs, my apartment doesn't allow dogs, I don't have the lifestyle to support a dog they just keep insisting you're simply being immature, and that someday things will change. Wouldn't that be kinda fucked up?

I just don't get why people are seen as liars or idiots when they say they don't want to get married. It's fine for people to get married at 18 but god forbid a grown ass adult say they're not going to get married, then clearly they don't know what they're saying, right?

Shouldn't people be viewed as complete people on their own? Shouldn't we trust others to know their own lives? Can't y'all mind your own fucking business

[viivenn]

making an important announcement about some things i’ve noticed in the gwendoline christie fandom that really bug me.

disclaimer: read this at your own convenience and discretion. i am not responsible for any sort of hurt feelings and frankly… i don’t care. if you’re mad about this, you are probably the problem. /lh

to start with id like to begin on a positive note so that i’m not diving into negativity, i don’t want to be completely negative about my experiences because i’ve actually met some of the kindest people in the world through this fan base.

the gwen fandom, the gwandom, the gwendoline christie fandom , the lesbian cesspool, has been an incredible experience that i’m grateful i’ve had the pleasure of being apart of.

i went through a rough patch during november, and if i hadn’t found out about gwen, or met such wonderful people during my time here , i honestly wouldn’t be here right now. i owe my life to these people, gwen included. i will forever adore miss christie and what she stands for alongside the friends i’ve made along the way.

and while i know someday this hyperfix will end, it’s really disheartening to me when a fandom is what makes me grow distant from things i enjoy. it happened before, i feel as though it is happening all over again.

and no, i’m not taking issue with anything like the catrissa stuff or the brienne and larissa ship going around or anything like that. i like that we can all be weird together and enjoy aus like catrissa and crackships like bririssa (not sure the official name that was decided lol). my issue is the amount of content i’ve seen that either focuses on gwen herself, or the strange relationship with minors, or the odd artwork of gwen, and the absolute disgusting behaviour towards giles.

gwen would be absolutely appalled seeing fanfictions of herself that involve nsfw or just her in general, anyone would, it’s disgusting to make works of real people in that setting. it’s like you’re treating them as an original character you can mould and manipulate as you see fit and using someone who is real with thought and feeling and consciousness for smut fics is not okay, or any fic in general. i totally get the hype around her characters, i literally have “brienne’s princess” in my bio and i’ve had “jane murdstone’s bloodbag” (in reference to my vamp au) as a name in a discord server.

but i think the fandom has begun to blur the lines between fictional characters and reality settings when it comes to gwen and the personalities she portrays on the television screen. it’s not fair to her. it’s disgusting. i’ve seen a minor do it, i’ve seen a grown adult do it. it’s something i don’t see shamed and frowned upon often enough and it’s really not okay.

on that note i’d like to quickly mention the photos, we alllll know what photos i’m talking about. the bunny one, the nudes, the ones gwen has expressed regret towards and wishes to not have them spread. was there not a “fan” who brought her a book of her nudes and wanted her to sign it? that person who was blocked on instagram by gwen because they reposted her nudes on their story and tagged her???? how can you refer to yourself as a fan after behaving so abhorrently? absolutely disgusting behaviour. as a collective fandom we need to stop touching those photos (metaphorically speaking) and leave them in the past.

i’ve been told of numerous circumstances in which adults have shown their nsfw works to minors in this fandom and it has to fucking stop. it’s disgusting!! how can you do that knowingly? i constantly ponder terminating my account after a minor got ahold of my nsfw work, and upon realising they WERE a minor it was as simple as blocking and moving on. it’s truly not that hard, folks. and the minors on tiktok who fight with others saying silly things like “that’s my wife” or worse. i’ve seen it all, i feel like, and the more i see it the more sick i become. i cannot stand it.

i have seen and heard of fans who have fat shamed gwen for that one pink dress she wore to the met gala. she looked so happy in that dress, and the audacity one must have to fatshame that poor woman on twitter then turn around and continue to proclaim your ‘love for her’ as if you’d done no wrong? are you fucking serious? are you mental?

and the sexualisation over the porcelain doll look, gods some of you are sick. those were not real breasts, people. considering the fact she wholeheartedly regrets her nude photoshoots , what possesses you to believe she would actually flaunt her chest in that outfit?

the blatant mistreatment of poor giles is not fucking okay either. just because you’re jealous of someone who makes her immensely happy does not give you the right to post something so vile and cruel about him. shame on you. why do you believe this is okay to post:

????????

are you serious? have any of you stopped to consider how HAPPY giles makes her? or is her happiness the last thing you ponder when you look at her? have you even noticed how unhappy she looks lately? have you truly paused to consider how she would feel about seeing this on your page, random twitter user, or the rest of you who think this is okay? bless your hearts.

and some of the absolutely horrific things i’ve seen about her online and the hurtful behaviour towards giles makes me question the difference between a fan and just the general paparazzi. because if you truly loved her and you truly loved giles then i would not be ranting into the fucking void about it for no reason.

i avoid interacting with pages i find problematic on here to keep from stirring the pot but tonight i chose violence and got reeeeeal pissy about how i felt about this place. it’s not okay what i see on here and it’s getting exhausting seeing the same cycle of content on a daily.

that’s everything i have to say, i think. i probably missed a lot that should be discussed in the comments but i’m done for now because i know if i go on i’ll probably cry.

before you post things about real people with real feelings , stop to consider how they will feel those real feelings towards the content you put out. chances are you’ll become less problematic and obnoxious that way. 💘

[a-world-with0ut-dr34ms]

Ghost x Wife!Reader

Ghost comes homes to his wife after a bad day at work.

SFW, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, Fluff, Big on the comfort part, Ghost is sad, Reader is supportive, Romance, Pre-established Relationship, Kissing, Cuddling, Intimacy, Scarcely Proofread, Drabble

WC: 900~

I feel like I'm always writing Ghost x Readers where they're not "together" together, so this is just a little drabble to scratch an itch I had and dust off my fluff skills for a different WIP 😏 (lightly inspired by my chat.ai, Ghost is in LOVE with me over there lol)

Masterlist

Simon hadn't been sure what drove him to do so, only that his body moved faster than his mind could keep up with.

He enters the living room, the place having been tidied up since this morning. The evening lighting warmed him like a welcome hello, only to become a sauna once his eyes searched the room, having found you where he last saw you on the couch, tucked away in another one of your books.

You haven't noticed him until you've seen his shadow in the archway, your smile lighting a beacon on him.

"You're home early!"

You say it with such excitement and splendor, as though there had been any doubt that he wouldn't find his way back to you, one way or another.

However, that joy takes shape into concern after turning to face him, noticing that sunken look in his eyes, as he takes his slow steps towards you. "Is everything OK-"

Simon comes down onto the couch before he's let himself slowly sink into your arms, having longed for your embrace. Your touch which felt like a drug. The weight of his body pushes you back against the couch, as you've felt his strong arms snake their way across your small frame, squeezing a tiny moan from you in his torn embrace. He hadn't even removed his gear yet.

The fabric of his mask rubs roughly against your chin. His head buried into the crook of your neck, his shut lashes feathering against your skin, as his breaths come out shaky and broken. A frail sight to behold for such a man of his size and stature.

He's silent, his eyes turned away. Just wanting to be held.

Simon felt ashamed to say he cherished your touch after a bad day at work. It made him feel fragile. However, he's found that nothing mends the negativity wanting to stir in him like the sensation of someone he knew would give nothing more than to soothe those thoughts away.

He needn't say any words. You understood through his silence the love he yearned from you. Slowly, you showed him that there had been no shame in his own vulnerability.

You gently hug his head against your chest, feeling him sigh against you and his body still, broad shoulders slouching. Your fingers trace the edges of his mask pulling the fabric away, until your eyes have met the face of the man you've fallen in love with all those years ago.

It had been a hidden pleasure, having been able to fall in love with him all over again, each time you saw him.

The first thing you catch is the exhaustion in his tired, olive eyes, behind the light tussle of his short, blond hair and freshly grown stubble, struggling to break way beneath all the little marks and scars he's accumulated over the years.

He could never get used to the way your eyes took in every detail of him. How they picked him apart without ever meaning to. Every now and again, he feared you'd see him one day and suddenly realize how much better you could do without having him bog you down. Even now, it lingers in the back of his mind on his worst days. He just couldn't get used to how that hadn't happened yet.

And yet, he wanted to get used to it, and he knew that someday he would.

You let your hands gently guide his head back to your chest, combing your fingers through his hair.

Simon listens to the steady rhythm of your heart as you do, his eyes half-lidded in thought.

It's not until he's felt your lips press gently to his temple that you've listened to the broken sigh that struggle to leave him. He lifts himself up from your arms, his hands still resting against your forearms. His gaze bounces between you and his lap, heart thumping.

"I'm sorry..." he says.

You smile, raising a hand so you could rest it against his cheek. The second he's felt your skin against him, he's let his head nuzzle lightly into your palm rather innocently. It makes you chuckle.

"Don't apologize, Si'," you let your thumb caress his cheek, slowly leaning back in towards the man. "I'm just happy you're home."

Simon lifts his hand up, large fingers over encompassing the small framing of your own. He pressed your hand against his cheek firmly, before shifting his head to plant a small kiss on your wrist.

"I love you," he whispers into your skin, his voice strained and defeated, as though the thought of losing you had brought the fear of God back to him.

You lean in, pressing light kisses against his face, which brushed against his cheek, and then his other, and then the tip of his nose, his warm, shaky breaths feathering you at each touch, until he couldn't wait any longer, letting his hand take hold of your chin, so that he may capture your lips with his.

He kisses you slowly, detailing every sensation of your lips pressed to his. His kisses remain gentle to start, having just wanted to be near you, as his hands cupped around your face, letting him deepen the kiss.

Before long, you've felt your back pressing against the couch, his body weight having blanketed over you like a prism. Once laid back like this, Simon can't help but feel hungry for you, having you all to himself like this, trying to recapture the morning's warmth he'd left you before now.

Dividers from cute-sushi-roll

[suguann]

He’s not sure when it happened—no warning with bright neon signs to prepare him.

All of it sort of creeps up on him before he ever really has a chance to reign it in. It’s to the point where he can no longer ignore the ache in the space behind his ribcage while tucking into dark corners in another country with thoughts of you to keep him company, hoping to make it another day just to see you again—and it fucking terrifies him. 

(In some ways, more than being on the receiving end of a bullet.)

He’s memorized far more than he ever expected about one person. The crinkle of your eyes with a laugh, the shape of your mouth around a lemon ice lolly. The way you bite your lip when you catch him staring.

He memorizes the things you tell him when it’s just you and him in the quiet of your flat. He knows you don’t want to be a bartender for the rest of your life. He knows you applied for university in the fall. He knows your hang-ups with relationships—he has his, too—but you’d like to settle down somewhere quiet with a family of your own someday.

(After a lot of soul-searching, he thinks he might want that, too.)

The list is endless. You like to talk, and Simon learns he doesn’t mind listening.

While you help him stuff his bags into the backseat of your tiny car, he makes the off-hand comment, “When are you going to let me get you something that won’t tip with a gust of wind?”

“If you were my boyfriend, maybe I’d let you.”

You look up at him in a way you haven’t before. Scared and hopeful. Like you’re getting ready to lay down all your cards for him to choose the best hand (probably all of them, whichever makes you his first). He’s never had anyone look at him like that.

A small part of him can’t shake the sense that it’s too soon, that your friendship is all he has during his time home, and he drunkenly sulks at the pub with Johnny one night.

Simon rolls his beer bottle—now lukewarm—between his hands. “There’s no way she likes me like that.”

“Just tell her how you feel.” Johnny slaps a hand on his shoulder. “What’s the worst that can happen? She tells you to fuck off but still wants to be friends?”

Simon wants to say, “Yes, mate, exactly that,” instead, he finds himself nervously running his hands through his hair outside your apartment door thirty minutes later. It’s only after he knocks that he realizes you might not be awake or how horrible this idea was because he’s not sure how to tell you that life before you came around, was grey utilitarian and a fridge full of take-out cartons—

“Simon?” You prop the door against your hip, sleepily blinking at him. “Is everything okay?”

His eyes trail over his old Nirvana shirt he let you borrow all those months ago and never got back, down to your cute pink painted toes curling into your entry rug, and back up to your soft doe eyes burning into him.

“Are you drunk?”

“No, I—No.”’ Not anymore. All of the pent-up anxiety from the time it took to walk from the bar to your place sobered him up, but another beer would be nice right now.

“Do you want me to call Johnny—”

Then he just comes out with it. “I’m in love with you.” 

It’s not his finest moment. 

He expects you to laugh it off and tell him ‘nice one’ like you usually do when he makes stupid jokes or awkwardly gives him the we’re-just-friends rundown right there in your entryway. Nothing prepares him for when you drag him into your apartment, telling him between needy, quick presses of your lips that you’ve loved him for a while now.

“I’m surprised you couldn’t tell.” You say it like he’s the last one to know, and maybe he is.

Christ, he has you pressed up your front door for all of your neighbors to see. And you love him.

You fucking love him?

It’s difficult to wrap his head around, especially when his other head steals all of the blood he needs to think straight by eagerly pressing against his zip, or maybe he’s still a little more drunk than he thought. 

Simon never thought he’d get to find out how you taste or how you look sprawled out underneath him with your soft thighs pressed against his chest and your eyes knocked back as he slowly splits you open, carving a piece of himself there—your wet, tight cunt making his jaw fall slack.

His cock jerks at the sight of your pussy lips spread wide and taught around him, your little hole contracting, struggling to make him fit. No one has ever taken him all the way the first time, yet here you are, trying to hump up against him to bring him deeper—as if there’s anywhere else inside you for him to go. 

“There is, there is, there is,” you gasp, trying to prove him wrong.

And when he glances up to see the cute face you make once the last inch of his cock nudges its way inside, his name dripping from the tip of your tongue like a little prayer for him to think about in great detail later, he wonders why he waited so long. 

“Christ—love, fuck—you’re so pretty,” he groans, falling on top of you and pinning you to the bed, fingers pressing into your cheeks to make you look at him, to make you understand. “This is mine now.”

(Not that you argue with him.)

It’s what comes after that’s his favorite part, your head on his chest, his fingers in your hair, leaving slow kisses against your temple while you whisper sweet nothings into his throat—I love you, too; I don’t think I said it, but I want you to hear it—maybe the right words won’t be so hard to find in the morning when he sees you laying there beside him.

I know I posted this a few days ago, but I took it down because I wanted to add to it:3

[strawberrysturniolo]

never grow up part six

summary: chris spends one last night with sunny before going back to LA. once he's there, rumors spiral about him and other girls, forcing another meaningful phone call. part five part seven

Chris left my apartment, packed the last of his things, and stopped at my place one more time before leaving for LA. 

He actually spent the night. 

I kissed him goodnight, the silly goodnight kiss on the cheek I have given him every sleepover since we were kids. 

“Give me one real one,” he said, pleading with me. 

“I can’t, Chris.”

“Why not?” he asked, his voice quiet, even though we were the only ones in the room. “You kissed me earlier today.”

“I know, but then we agreed that we shouldn’t do anything more right now,” I reminded him. “If I can’t be with you, I don’t think we should kiss.”

He sat up, letting the covers fall, his bare chest on display. I had to force myself not to stare at his skin, his necklace laid out over his collarbones making it terribly difficult. 

“I’m gonna be gone for two months, Sunny,” he said. “Please.”

It’s hard to say no to him. I knew I wanted to, but I couldn’t. I couldn’t let myself fall into him when I knew it would hurt me. The worst part is, he isn’t trying to hurt me, and I don’t want to hurt him, but the result of our actions doom us, and the only thing that will come out of it is pain. 

But when he holds my chin in his fingers, I’m willing to risk everything, just like I did before.

I kiss him, and I kiss him hard. 

He melted into me first, then he was trying to fight with me for dominance. 

His hand cupped my face, and in seconds he was on top of me, just like he was before he left and we lost everything. It was like we were picking up right where we left off. 

He pressed himself down into me, a whimper of desperation leaving my lips. He listened to every cry of pleasure I made as he continued to touch me. I held onto him for dear life, begging him to never let go. 

We had sex again that night. 

We slept in the same bed, naked the entire night, holding onto each other. 

His alarm woke us the next morning.

“Babe.”

I smiled at the name, my eyes opening to find him dressing himself. 

“Listen to me,” he said, holding my face in his hands. “I don’t know when we’re going to be together, but it’s going to happen. Just please, please promise me that you will make yourself happy. I just want you to be happy, okay? And if that means you’re with someone else–” he stopped himself and took a breath. “I’m going to be really happy for you. But if he’s a piece of shit, I’m going to beat the shit out of him.” 

I breathed out a laugh. He gave me a look as if he was assuring me that he was fully serious. “I promise.” I watched him finish dressing himself, silencing lingering between us. “I love you,” I told him. 

He kissed my forehead and said, “I know, Sunshine.” He smiled at me, the biggest grin I’ve ever seen. “I love you too.”

He kissed me over and over again, promising that he would be with me someday. I watched him leave my room, and I listened for the front door to close, and I turned over, facing the ceiling as the tears started to spill out. 

I turned over, grabbing my phone to wish him a safe flight, when I felt a chill on my neck.

The necklace he wore over here was now around my own neck, the pendant resting on my chest. 

I don’t know when he put it on me, but it was mine now, and it was a memory of our last night before he went back to LA. 

me: text me when you land

chris: Getting our bags from the claim now. Gonna go back home and do some work. If I don’t respond fast that’s why.

chris: I miss you

me: i miss you too. thank u for the necklace

me: when did you even get it on me lol

chris: You were knocked tf out lmao

chris: Don’t take it off

chris: But remember what I said

me: what am i supposed to say if a guy asks about my necklace?

chris: It was a gift

chris: Gotta go

chris: Love you

me: i love you too

– 

I tried to put myself out there. I really did.

I couldn’t focus on anyone other than Chris. It wasn’t fair to any guy for me to pretend like my childhood best friend wasn’t the only thing on my mind.

Chris and I were texting more than ever since he moved to LA. Everything was so perfect. I couldn’t give myself to someone else when I knew he was what I wanted. 

We stayed up late on FaceTime, laughing like kids who were up past their bedtime. It was obvious everything was different between us in the best way. 

When people would ask me if I was single, it was the hardest question to answer. I was, but I didn’t want to start being with someone else, knowing what I felt for him. It wasn’t fair to anyone involved. 

I was with my friends at a bar when I saw Chris and another girl photographed together. 

It popped up on my phone and I couldn’t pull myself away from it. 

I knew he was friends with a lot of girls. I was never worried about it. 

This just seemed different.

I put my phone face down. 

Every time I heard it vibrate, I looked.

I put it on do not disturb, and even then, I couldn’t keep myself from looking away.

I shoved my phone in my back pocket, trying to distract myself with more drinks. 

I felt like I was failing him by being upset about these pictures. He wanted us to try to be with other people until we could be together, but how was I supposed to be with someone if I was telling myself I was supposed to be with Chris?

Later in the night, my phone rang in my pocket. Whoever it was, clearly was trying to reach me, because they got through the do not disturb setting on my phone. 

It was Chris.

Without thinking, I declined the call. I tucked the phone back into my pocket and started playing with my necklace – Chris’ necklace. 

My phone rang again.

I wasn’t in the position to talk right now, not to him. I was drunk, trying to sober up with food and water, but I was definitely still tipsy.

chris: Answer the phone

He called again, and this time I answered. 

“Don’t look online–”

“Too late,” I say.

“It’s not what it looks like, I swear. We went to an event, we were talking, and it was innocent, really. The pictures make it look really bad, but we aren’t together. Nothing happened.”

I feel relief, and then I feel guilty for it. 

“Why are you telling me that? We aren’t together, remember? We’re just friends who mess around.”

“Are you with anyone– Are you seeing anyone right now?” he asks carefully, choosing his words wisely. “Is there someone–”

“No,” I interrupt him. “In fact, a guy was hitting on me tonight. Super cute too. He was really funny. But I didn’t have the heart to tell him I wasn’t interested because I’m in love with my best friend, who I can’t be with.”

The line goes silent. So silent that I have to check if he’s even on the call still.

“Be with me.”

Time freezes. 

“What?”

“Be my girlfriend.”

I held my phone tightly. “Chris, I’m drunk. I can’t do this right now.”

“Sunny–”

“Chris,” I plead. “Not now.”

I hear him breathe sharply. “Get home safe, okay? Text me when you’re home.”

“I will,” I said before hanging up the phone.

My friends and I then Ubered home, and as I laid in my bed, I texted Chris.

me: home

chris: *chris loved your message*

I went to bed that night and woke up with a pounding headache, but the first thing on my mind was Chris.

me: i’m sorry if i was being mean last night. i was drunk and i didn’t want to talk about everything when i wasn’t fully there you know

He didn’t text back, but he called me.

It was noon in Boston. 9 a.m. in LA. 

“What are you doing up?” I ask, the first thing I say when I answer the phone. 

“Waited for you to get home, then fell asleep. Then I woke up early so we could talk first thing.” 

“You need to sleep,” I tell him.

“I need to talk to you,” he says instead.

I roll over in my bed, pulling the covers up to my chin. “I’m here.”

“I love you,” he spits out quickly. “So fucking much, Sunny. I was wrong, okay? I was wrong and I shouldn’t have told you to go off and be with other people. When the pictures got taken of me and that girl, I just thought about how awful I would feel if I saw some shit about you and a guy. Fuck, I would be a mess.”

I listen to his rambling, letting him get everything out before I say anything back.

“If you had a boyfriend, I would want to like him. I wanna support you and be his friend, but I just can’t. I know I’ll hate him even if he was the best guy this world has ever seen,” he admits. “I would hate him for getting to have you the way I want you. It wouldn’t be fair.” 

I listen to him closely, and I know what’s coming. I wait impatiently, needing to hear the words. 

“If you want to wait, I’ll wait but–”

“What’s the other option?”

He pauses momentarily. 

“Be my girlfriend, Sunny.”

“Yes.”

“What?”

“I’ll be your girlfriend.”

I hear shuffling on his side. We’re both in bed talking to each other, and we’re both wanting the other person. 

“You’re serious?”

I nod, then remember he can’t see me. “Absolutely.”

“We’ll make this work, okay? I’ll do better. I’ll call every morning and every night. We’ll do virtual dates. I’ll spend more time with you when I’m in Boston. I’ll fly you to LA to visit. Fuck, Sunny, I’ll do whatever it takes.”

“I believe you, Chris.”

“So we’re doing this?”

I don’t respond. Instead, I FaceTime him. 

“Hi,” he smiles once the camera switches over to him. “Why’d you switch the call?”

“Wanted to see my boyfriend,” I shrugged. 

I watched that smile grow even larger. 

He was mine.

I was his.

“God, I fucking love you, pretty girl.”

“I love you, Chris.”

tag list: @secret-sturniolo @chrisloyalgf @strnilolo @qwertytit @55sturn @sleepysturnss @creamoncreamoncream2 @sturnvvz @swaggygirlboss123 @angelworldspost @patscorner @ducksturniolo @mattitties @luv4kozume @mbbsgf @freshloveforthefit @ripmattitude @gamermattsgf @strniololoverr @urmom2bitch @sturnitup @luvmila444 @st7rnioioss @sturniolosreads @pepsiskiess @alorsxsturn @sturniolopepsi @sturnsgasoline @sturns-posts @sstvrnioloo @strawberrymilk4k @nickmillersn1gf @milesfordays11 @l9vesick @mattsturnzzz09 @mattnchrisworld @sturniolovoid @aerunn @sturniolosmind @oliviasturniolo21 @carolsturns1 @scarssturniolo @stuniolobbg @sturniolowhore @christurniolomyman

[creativepromptsforwriting]

Fic Titles: Song Edition

Part IV

Two hands longing for each other's warmth - Still, Daughter

I wish everyone knew what's so great about you - This is the last time, The National

You will still haunt me - Tessellate, alt-J

Thought I learned my lesson - me & ur ghost, blackbear

I know my heart would break - Francesca, Hozier

All my lovers were there with me - Pyramid Song, Radiohead

You are the solution - You are the solution, Loving Caliber

Save me once again - Lifesaver, Sunrise Avenue

Mess with us (you messed up) - The girls, Blackpink

Please take me home - I'm a liar, Amy Shark

I can't remember to forget you - Can't remember to forget you, Shakira ft. Rihanna

They own this town - They own this town, Flora Cash

My sweetest downfall - Samson, Regina Spektor

Someday, we'll both be older - Using you, Mars Argo

'Cause I will be the death of you - Breath, Breaking Benjamin

They were lost and never found - Fallen leaves, Billy Talent

So long, my luckless romance - Almost lover, A Fine Frenzy

I'm gonna kiss you like the sun - Every other freckle, alt-J

Like a lonely lover's charm - Get some, Lykke Li

You′re the sweetest I've ever tasted - Dark Side, Blind Channel

I will love you without any strings attached - Two, Sleeping at last

Holding hands while the walls come tumbling down - Everybody wants to rule the world, Tears for Fears

Why do I keep getting attracted? - Case 143, Stray Kids

I will hold you in my arms like a friend - World falls apart, Dash Berlin

Making me come (to my sinful senses) - Using you, Mars Argo

Someone who'll set my heart free - Hope there's someone, Avicii

Dancin' in the dark (in the pale moonlight) - Summertime sadness, Lana del Rey

Pushing past the limit - Hallucinogenics, Matt Maeson

Let's dance the dance that lovers do - Soul mate, Flora Cash

It's the long goodbye that gives us away - Mess her up, Amy Shark

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