#i wouldnt mind any final changes tho…i still do think he could look better

[kremechihihi]

i like his design idc

[sillyyuserr]

Chapter 117 analysis (WE’RE SO BACK) obviously spoilers for chapter 117 and chapter 114

i cooked with this one trust

Everyones looking for them yadayadayada terukane

Yk im pretty sure this is meant to be lore heavy but LOOK AT THEM

I don’t know how to word this correctly but since chapter 115/116 between akane and teru there seems to have been something that happened in which they stopped being freaky?? 😭 like ykwim hold on

in chapter 114 this happened

completely ruined almost everything they had, but in the span of a few days, shit still going on, they havent had their deserved break yet like they got on chapter 96-97 and somehow in the midst of all this teru’s forgiven(?) him and just moved on?? Really not sure but based on what we know ab the red house the next chapter may answer some of our questions

Also, this is so little i didn’t see it the first time reading but teru goes to the drink machine thing to get one and mixes like 4 of the sodas,

takes one sip decides its shit and switches with akane’s already half drunken out of tea. Indirect kiss guys wait

Also this is JUST like the date they all went on when aoi was gone. Again, aoi is gone here too 😭 my girl getting left out of everything is acc crazy

She comes in later tho and finally gets caught up for the first time in forever MAN aidairo must hate her😭

But also

We find out mitsuba and kou are going there TOO so for the first time i think ever we have the whole gang in one spot 🤥 alot of firsts this chapter smh

ALSO an honorable mention to this i saved best for last

Sir stay away from my children

ok but fr i have no fucking clue what to say ab this cus this is either ‘teehee im right ur wrong!!~~♡’ type shit which he does alot, or genuinely like what we all think it is, which considering outside context may, in fact make it make sense trust let me explain

teru says shit like this ALL THE TIME its kind of his ACTUAL personality aside from his fake shit, like the way he is only around akane and sometimes kou (at least what we’re shown) so you’d think he’s used to this, but his initial reaction is more of a ‘um. what.’

ALSO— backround MATTERS, the backround in this one, is pure black, which is only shown during stuff LIKE THIS (important stuff) example:

Black background either means its dark, or its something important, something meant to be remembered, or something like that (probably)

and that panel had a BLACK BACKROUND

Why is this important you may be asking, it has a black backround— so it must be, right? If this was a silly little ‘teehee you can’t do this im better than youuu!!!~~♡’ then it probably wouldnt even have a half panel it’d be another one of the mini panels, but it not only had a whole panel for just this, a black background ;blocking LITERALLY EVERYTHING OUT ASIDE FROM THIS AND WHAT HE’S SAID, but also, pay attention the contents of what he said.

(a different translation, this one is easier to read)

‘you are not in any position to oppose me, are you, aoi? ♡’ could mean, A LOT OF THINGS so i’ll put them in a bulletin here because any of them make for an interesting path we may be taking on ‘this’ reality😭😓

Number 1: he could be impliying, and or reminding akane, that he’s still engaged to aoi, and that if akane still thinks they shouldnt change this reality, he should reconsider, CONSIDERING he is engaged to aoi, as aforementioned. (Most likely this one)

Number 2: the power dynamic, yes akane is a school mystery with the ability to control time itself but also, teru is an exorcist, a skilled one at that— and could probably easily overpower akane in a 1v1 (lowk hyped to see this happen pls let them fight) teru may be poking fun, or reminding akane, that teru is in fact powerful, more than he seems to keep fresh on his mind — them having SO MUCH to do

Number 3: maybe instead he just felt like teasing akane and i wasted time+space for nothing and was looking way too into it (this is supposed to be the terukane option😪)

Never once has he used this before??? Obviously you cant talk in symbols but the heart kind of implies the user of this symbol is talking in a playful/slightly flirtatious tone, hence, the reaction:

Okay okay point is i think teru is still madly in love with him

WAAAHHHH just look at him pooks who else does he do this with smhh 😓 NO ONE

which i think may be PARTIALLY true but also not entirely because mayb im just a tweaker

Me when i when i ehen you whrn you when

This may make no sense at all, or alot of sense man idk its 3:12am i go back to school in like 2 weeks i am not ready for sophomore year gn

terukane will be real one day trust, also i have a twitter i post on sometimes @/silly_evvvie <3

[sukirichi]

Aaaaaaaa sukiiiiiii why you do this to meeeee 😭😭

Brain mush, im very exhausted so im sorry if ill rant dhdhajdjs

The whole rin diary part - sparked lots of joy 🥺🥺🥺

This part right after

This does not spark joy 😒 like really? really? After we kept admitting we still love rin even while being with omi we go ahead and say that? Especially after reading the damn diary... Really?

This update made my heart shatter for our dearly idiot rin even more.. He keeps thinking we just... Wont love him if we know who he really when (jokes on him we do know) and it just.. It really breaks me

The fact he truly looks that low on himself to the point he believes we are with him just cause hes a prince and if he never was we wouldnt even notice him... Bruh i just.. I want to hug him.. Royal life truly shattered him mentally to the point he has no self esteem uh..

This part tho caught my attention:

He keeps trying to push us away but perhaps cause he's noticeable tired, I mean its described at o e point that he has dark circles under his eyes, what i believe its because hes been sleeping on the couch or something because he refuses to sleep in the same bed as iris (since he did kinda hinted that she had the bed all to herself). And perhaps thanks to him being exhausted he just cant stop himself fron letting little truths come out, he didnt even seem to notice it while we truly did.

Im still disappointed? Bitter? Ahahahha that the baby is staying dhshshhdhoas he's our hubby man i dont want him to be having some other bitch's baby when neither he or she wanted it 🙃 like please just do something good for the story iris and go ahead and lose it 🤣🤣 at this point only the queen will be pissed and we love that royal bitch pissed 🤣🤣

Sorry i wanted to give a better review but damn my job has been killing me ahahahah thank you so much for another update tho, these even tho they kill me 🤡 in a way always cheer me up and make me having something to look forward for.

Also yes kuroooooo destroy the bitchhhhh ahahhaha

the rin diary part!! man I remember having to like sit down for a long time just so I could use the perfect words LIKE WHY DID NO ONE TELL ME ITS HARD TO BE POETIC LMFAO. not that it DID become poetic but it was the best I could pull out of my ass lmaoooo. omg okay I get that it doesn’t spark joy but hear me out!! at that point we’d already fallen for kiyoomi and yknow like… we already know that rintaro hasn’t been that good anyway, and we’re finally choosing what’s right, what’s BETTER (because dtd!yn has always been a character who will most likely end up doing what she thought was right and its really hard to change her mind lol but it’s just!! a matter of what feels right in that moment!!) and in that moment choosing kiyoomi and finally accepting that he has feelings for us felt like the right one! and the diary you know, it really is confusing cuz like – WE LITERALLY HAD JUST BEGUN OUR THING WITH KIYOOMI AND EVERYTHING IS GOING WELL then we see that our husband has always been secretly writing his feelings about us LIKE THE TIMING HONESTLY CAN’T GET ANY WORSE LOL

oh yeah… rin’s inferiority complex has just completely gotten worse because all his insecurities have gone from ten to a hundred. like he somehow always felt like he wasn’t good enough but to know that he was never a prince?! my boy needs therapy. and yes omg that part!! I know during the scene where he kicked us out our room was trying to imply that he wants to share the same bed as iris but naur!! my boy rin won’t even touch her within a ten foot pole in that moment, he just stays on the couch and can barely sleep because he sent us to belleview manor of all places. I just know he stayed up all night thinking about what we’re doing with kiyoomi and well… his imaginations are right because we’re making out with him lol. LMAOOOO I KEEP FORGETTING ABOUT THE BABY I think its bcos iris has been off-screen for such a while now that lowkey I forgot she and the queen existed (in other terms I’m just too excited to write about runaway rin and yn!! and I’m such a pea brain lol)

also no omg!! I hope you’re getting some rest and a well-deserved break though! and thank you so muchhh IM SO HAPPY YOU’RE ENJOYING DTD HEHEHEHE as always I appreciate you for showing so much love and I’m sending you more back!! <33

[hotrobins]

touch me if you dare || jason todd

Summary: Jason and fem!reader starts a friends-with-benefits relationship after a dirty joke.

Content: Smut with a little fluff and innocence kink.

Word count: 1646

Half-hour had passed since Jason came back from Bruce's office and he was still rage trembling. He didn't want to say what they discussed, he just deep breathed while driving, his knuckles white.

You knew him since you started working in the Gotham Public Library two years ago, but the talking that led to this friendship was still pretty recent. Today you were going to an aquarium inauguration but when his father called and said that there were urgent matters to discuss, you insisted that he should go and you would wait in the car, so Jason changed the route to the Wayne's Building.

Clearly he regret that decision now, because he stormed from there without a word and drove you to your apartment in silence, only breaking the silence to apologize to you once. When you arrived tho, he didnt unlock the car doors.

There you were, wanting to help him calm down but not knowing how since he didnt want to open up, not knowing if its better just say good night as clue to remember him to let you go, or you should invite him in.

You looked at him at your side, one hand at the steering wheel, the other clenched in a fist on his tight. Jason's eyes were closed and you allowed yourself to admire him aside your worries about his emotional state.

Jason was beautiful in hard angles and undertones. In the first couple months in the library, you were still fresh with the thinking that readers were a solid type, and every day you were surprised to see a boy like him enter and spend the late afternoon with his nose in a book. Now, being his friend, you knew Jason were a bookworm, but looking at him still took your breath. In this moment specially, with his muscles compressed, the semblance hard and that big hand against a bigger tight, something right down your belly woke.

He let out a light chuckle and you looked up to his face, panicked.

"Liking the view?" He said with amusement. The right side of his mouth doing that thing and leaving a dimple to show.

You ignored the ask and focused on the desert street in front of you, for sure blushing a deep red. You still could feel his gaze on your body.

As the seconds passed, the atmosphere in the car began to change again, and you knew his playfull smile hadnt hit deep in his demeanor.

"There's something I can do?" You said on a low tone.

"May you give me a blowjob?" He blurted, releasing a deep laugh. "Never heard of a man with bad humor while having his dick sucked." He was trying to change the air between you two, too.

"Yeah, i wouldnt mind." You said at once without thinking, and Jason couldn't hold back another laugh, this time a real one.

You should feel glad that he found you funny, but in that moment you discovered you were serious. "What? To be honest, I wouldnt not only mind it, but would really delight myself with it." You said with the most sensual voice you could make, adjusting yourself in the seat to see him better.

Now he was serious too, his blue eyes with dilated pupils holding yours. You couldn't maintain the glase as his adam apple went down as he swallowed dry, putting a lock of hair behind your ear.

"So touch me if you dare, darling."

It was all it took. Without another moment pass he opened his belt and lowered his jeans enough for you too see he was already half hard. As you took his cook in your hand, you wondered if you looked too desesperate, but when he sighed immediately and leanead comfortably on the car seat allowing you to touch with him better, you forgot to care if he could feel it was the first time you ever did it.

You started slowly, pulping him up and down, learning the texture, touching some veins that pulsed lightly, seeing as his tip disappeared and appeared again a little more wet every time, slobbering your hand and then the rest of his cock. The view of it was driving you insane to taste it, so as you began to bend down Jason let out a quiet moan, feeling your hot breath so close to his tip but not on him yet. You looked up as gave it a tentative lick, and the way his eyelids fluttler before opening to look at you, god, you felt it.

You were right, Jason tasted more amazing than you have imagined, and soon you were not only licking the tip but were with all his dick inside your mouth, touching it as you could with your tongue as one of your hands rubbed the rest of him and the other massaged his balls. You couldn't get enough of feeling the taste of him and his moans, now less contained, only gave you more confidence to keep going.

The lack of pratical knowledge didn't troubled you anymore cause the way Jason where breathing hard only proved you were doing the thing right, even if it was in a slow pace.

"Fuck.." He said in surprise when you started playing with only his tip, circling it with your tongue.

His hips sometimes buckled up and you kissed his dick, putting it all in your mouth and letting it out with a pop, before giving special attention to the tip again.

"Enough with the tease darlin-" You went all way down again and tried to move your tongue, but it was too much and you gagged.

"Easy, easy.." He touched your cheek while you recovered your breath with your head leaning in his covered tight, your right hand never stoping the light caresses in his cock.

He was looking at you in a strange way and you desesperate needed to change the focus of his attention so you closed your fist firmly.

Jason moaned with eyes finally closing again, and you started once more your ministrations. The taste of him and the sensation of his hips bucking involuntary where too good for you and you moaned too, the vibration making him take part of your hair in his hand. You looked up to see a question in his half open blue eyes, the answer were another moan of you.

You started rubbing him vigorously while you sucked his tip, the hand on your hair not forcing you down but not letting you go either, and Jason's moans were becoming more frequent. He was close.

He loosed the grip on you reluctantly "I'm.. I'm going to.. You should.."

But you do not moved away, you put his dick all down your mouth until it touched your throat, and even if his cock didnt fit entirely, you tried. Your gag reflexes send him over the edge.

He come hard on you, throwing cum directly down your throat as his hips trembled. He could feel you trying to breathe and swallow his seed and control your gagling at same time and it made him want to fuck your mouth for real.

When you pulled off, you didn't think twice before licking his dick again, making sure that there wasn't any trace of his cum behind. Only then you got up and straightened yourself in the seat.

You didn't looked at him nor give him the chance to speak first, the realization of what happened coming hard.

"Look, I don't usually treat my male friends like this so don't judge me. Im not a slut, really, to be honest i have never done this before so.. And no, i retire what i said, there's not such thing as a slutty woman okay? We should do what we want without feeling guilty by society and-" Jason took your hand on his.

"Wait a moment." He said caressing your hand with his tumb. "You said you never did it before? Give head?"

You looked at him, there were not judgment, only curiosity and respect in Jason's face.

"I'm.. I shouldnt have said it but, yeah. If it wasnt obvious and you already knew, now you know." There was shame on your shoulders even if he wasnt being judgmental and seemed to have appreciated the moments before.

His eyes never left yours as he thought in silence, the atmosphere between you changing again.

"I never kissed either so it's not a big deal i gave you head because you joke about it, we should forget it.. Can you please unlock the door now?"

He put his hand on your waist to stop you from reach the panel, you had to look on his face, now just centimeters from yours. His breath were a mix of something and spearmint.

"You don't think I should claim your first kiss too? I mean.." His voice were low, controlled.

"I just.. your.. you know.."

"Yeah, i know darling. I want to taste it on you."

You closed your eyes and it was his clue. He closed the space between you two, using the hand on your waist to put your body closer. His lips were soft and his posture controlled, but you could feel how he was trying not to push your limits, how his tongue wanted enter your mouth and call it his. You were breathless, you didn't though it would be like this. So much with so little. Your heart pounded and when you opened your eyes and you saw you had leanead on his chest, both hands on his strong shoulders.

He had a half smile in his lips, the dimple a moment to show in its glory.

"It's starting to rain Jason." You managed to say.

"Yeah, and I'm only starting to kiss you for tonight.." He bended in your direction again, never taking his eyes from your lips.

[honeykawa]

Fly | Route: Tanaka Ryuunosuke

genre: mafia au, choose your own adventure

warnings: violence, suggestive themes but nothing graphic

word count: 3.1k

Fly Masterlist

“I choose him”

You looked at the man who had been standing in the corner of the room with his arms crossed

“Tanaka get your ass moving and take them home. Pick them up in the morning and take them home from now on. Make sure they dont run away or itll be on your head”

“Got it boss”

The car ride to your apartment was filled with silence and the soft sound of music coming from the radio

You were too nervous to say anything

The growing feeling of anxiety in your chest made it almost hard to breath

You started to unconsciously grab at the area above your chest and your breathing became irregular

‘How did i get into this mess?’ ‘whats going to happen to me?’

These thoughts keep rushing through your head

“--hey are you okay?”

Tanaka pulled the car over so he could stop and assess just what was happening

And from the way he saw it...it looked like an anxiety attack

His panicked a little himself watching you like this he didnt even want to imagine the feelings rushing through you right now

He got you to control your breathing again and come down from your panic

“You good now?”

You nodded your head, still weary about being near this man

He could tell you were still on your guard with the way you wrapped your arms around your body, as if you were trying to make yourself smaller

“I know it seems rough right now but i swear itll be okay”

His voice was soft with you, something you didnt expect from someone in the mafia

The car ride after that went pretty smooth

“We’re here”

The ride went faster than you thought it would and you got out of his car before saying your goodbyes

“Ill pick you up in the morning...if you need me heres my card”

He held out his card to you as you slowly took it from his hands

“See you”

And with that he sped off as you went inside your apartment to go to bed, hoping that maybe this had all been a dream

Once tanaka got back to his apartment he immediately plopped himself onto his bed and covered his eyes with his arm while thoughts of you plagued his mind

‘Cute’

His arm fell down to his side and he just stared at the ceiling

“Get your shit together tanaka. Your job is to watch them, nothing more”

He rolled over to his side with thoughts of you fading as he drifted into sleep

You woke up to the sound of light knocking on your door

And as soon as you opened the door it finally set in that last night really did happen

“Are you ready to go?”

Tanaka took one look at you and let out a deep sigh knowing that you werent

“Ill give you fifteen minutes”

You nodded your head as you ran back into your room and changed into something work appropriate

Wait where were you working? What would be considered work appropriate?

Based off of what tanaka was wearing you assumed something business casual

When you came out you looked at tanaka to see if this was good enough and he just nodded his head and started walking back towards his car, opening the door for you to get in

“I talked it over with daichi and youll be working with me as my assistant”

Your eyes widened and he immediately knew what went through your mind

“No not like that! Like with actual business stuff you wont really have to do anything with the mafia”

His flailing around made you laugh a bit and lifted a weight off of your shoulders

Listening to you laugh was almost relaxing, his cheeks heating up from the mere sight of your carefree smile

He gave you a quick tour of the place and introduced you to the others if you ran into them but that was about it

As his assistant you really didnt do much

If anything it felt like he was just an over glorified babysitter

But you shuffled through the files he gave you and sorted them the way he wanted

Tanaka watched you from the corner of his eye while you both worked

It wasnt that he was worried you would do it wrong

But it was just last night that you had that anxiety attack right in front of him

“y/n do you want to go out?”

You looked up from your papers and looked at him in confusion

“Right now? And what do you mean by ‘go out’?”

A big smile appeared on his face

“Yeah right now! Lets go! And dont think too much of it”

He stood up and grabbed his wallet

You followed him and as you two rounded the corner of the block he held the door open to a small cafe

“Go ahead and order whatever you want its on me”

You were weary about being here

Would you two get in trouble for leaving like that?

Tanaka could see the worry still lingering on your face and rose his hand to gently pat your head

“Like I said its on me so dont worry about leaving the office ill take any repercussions if there are any”

The grin on his face took a weight off of your chest and you felt like the air around you wasnt so thick anymore

After getting back to the office no one had even noticed that you two had even left

Whos running this place??

The next few weeks seemed to be fine

It was almost like you lived a normal life and you werent being watched by the mafia

You and tanaka had grown closer and it was easier to talk to the others now

He treated you kindly and tried to understand your situation

Unlike the two interns who always berated you for not knowing where certain files were or would roll their eyes when you would flinch at sudden movements the first few days

But tanaka took it slow with you, doing little things so that youd be more comfortable

At first it was subtle

If you needed to go make a copy of something he’d suddenly need to go grab something from the copy room with you even if you insisted that you could get it for him

Or how he always tried to include you in conversations with others so you would get more comfortable around everyone

Tanaka grew to be someone who it was easy for you to be around

But that sense of calmness was quickly wiped away when you joined him on one of his...excursions

“Heres the case. Now give us what we want”

Tanaka held the case in front of him while you just watched from the car

Sure, he’d take you with him but he’d never let you actually get out

He didnt really want this to take too long

Especially since it was just him against a good handful of men

But the men he was making the trade deal with suddenly saw you in move in the car and locked eyes with you

His smile sent a chill down your spine formed on his face

“New deal: give me that hot piece of ass in the car and you have a deal”

Tanakas jaw clenched at the the disgusting words just said about you

“Im sorry but,”

You couldnt see tanakas face until he looked up at the man in front of him

The look on his face utterly terrified you

“I’ll kill you if you even try to put a hand on them”

Everyone stood there unmoving, too scared to move

Tanaka turned around and headed back to the car where you were

“Deals off if that wasnt clear”

But one of the other men moved towards him

“The fuck you mean its off!”

Tanaka easily evaded the man’s advance and took him down with only a quick few movements

“Anyone else want to try”

The question was simple enough but no one dared made eye contact with him as he got into the car and drove off

The car ride was quiet, youd never seen tanaka look like that before

It scared you

He scared you

Tanaka noticed your silence and reached a hand out to pat your head but his chest went heavy at the sight of you flinching

“Y/n?”

You knew he wouldnt hurt you but you couldnt stop the slight tremble

“Im sorry tanaka”

A weak smile appeared on his face

“It’s fine y/n. i’ll take you home, okay?”

You just nod your head and neither of you talk the rest of the ride

A few days go by and you can feel the distance between you and tanaka growing

Its so noticeable that the others in the office can feel the awkwardness between the two of you

Tanaka suddenly stood up from his seat which startled you but he quickly rose his hands

“Woah sorry didnt mean to scare you”

He said it with such a sad smile on his face that it almost hurt to even look at him

“Ill be back in a moment, gotta use the bathroom”

You nodded your head as he left and let out a sigh

You knew he was just doing business

This was his job

It just shocked you to see the man thats been so kind to you to look...like that

Tanaka on the other hand knew this would happen eventually

He washed his face in the sink and looked up at his reflection

‘Remember your place. They deserve better’

He wiped off his face before heading back to his office only to see you not there

His heart just drop not seeing you there

“y/n?!”

He was about to bolt out of there but as soon as he turned around he bumped right into you

You fell onto the ground and the papers you were holding scattered around everywhere

You both just looked at each other for a moment

“Tanaka--”

Before you could say anymore he scooped you into his arms and you could feel the slight tremble in his shoulders before he quickly pulled away once he realized what he was doing

“Sorry y/n i dont know what came over me”

He started help to pick up the papers you dropped but before he could get too far you pulled him into a hug

He was frozen on the spot at feeling your touch

The warmth from your hands made his heart beat erratically

“Im sorry tanaka”

Your arms tightened around him

Youd seen so many sides of him

How clumsy he was

How kind he could be

Youve also seen how scary he could be and honestly it still shocked you

But you want to believe in him

The him thats been nothing but gentle with you

You could hear him let out a shaky breath before pulling you into his chest

After that your relationship with tanaka went back to normal

Or at least as normal as it could have been

Ever since that day youve started to notice how your heart speeds up whenever you look at him

Or the butterflies in your stomach when he smiles at you

He was careful to not let you see the mafia side of things anymore

You appreciate the thought but youd be lying if you said it didnt worry you when he came to work bandaged or bruised

Today was one of those days where tanaka had picked you up with some visible injuries

The cut on his face looked fairly fresh and without realizing it you reached up and gently ran your thumb over it

“Um what are you doing y/n”

Not that tanaka hated this

He felt his heart flutter at your touch

“You know, i dont mind helping you if you need it”

He smiled and took your hand off of his face

“Thank you y/n but im fine”

Just knowing that you cared was enough for him

‘I love you’

They were words he couldnt say

But he knew this life wasnt for you and he couldnt force you to come live in it

A few weeks go by and you feel like every time you get close to him he pulls back to just keep it barely within the realm of just friends

But that was fine as long as you could stay near

It was another one of those days where tanaka was off doing mafia business so noya kept you company

He always had his guard up but he seemed to take a liking to you

“Do you like tanaka”

The question caught you so off guard you dropped your pen

You looked up at him

“Is it that obvious?”

Noya kept working on whatever was in front of him not even sparing you a glance

“Painfully”

You could feel your embarrassment rising

“But if it makes you feel any better i think he likes you too so promise me...make him happy”

Before you could say anything back noyas phone went off and he immediately answered

His eyes went wide and his head whipped towards you before hanging up and dragging you somewhere

“Noya! Where are we going?”

He rushed you into a car and he took the wheel before driving off to who knows where

“Where are we?”

He got out of the car and opened your door

You were at an apartment complex from the look of it

“We’re at tanakas apartment hurry up”

You immediately got out and followed after him and you almost felt your legs give out seeing the state tanaka was in

Bloody and battered

Hinata was sitting next to his bed with his arms crossed

“Idiot rushed in despite not having a gun”

Noya rolled his eyes

“You know he doesnt like carrying one whyd you let him go alone?”

“Not my fault he didnt stop to think”

They kept talking to each other and went into the other room leaving you both alone

His breathing seemed stable as he slept but tears escaped your eyes as you took a seat next to him

Noya left you with tanaka and told you to take care of him

“He’ll try to tell you hes okay. Dont listen to him hes a fucking liar so take good care of him for me”

It was funny but it almost sounded like a goodbye

Tanaka woke up later that night only to see you sitting next to him with tear stains on your cheeks

The thought of you shedding tears because of him both hurt and warmed his heart

He reached up to wipe your face despite the pain he felt

Your cheeks fit perfectly within his hand and he found it cute how you leaned into his touch subconsciously

He couldnt move much but this is all he needed

You woke up before he did that next morning and decided to make some breakfast for the both of you

When you came back in he was just waking up

“Good morning tanaka”

The smile on your face as the sunlight trickled in through the window made him feel at ease

This...this was the life he longed for

“Morning”

He tried to sit up but flinched while doing so

You rushed to his side and set the food down before helping him up

“Dont push yourself. Youre still pretty banged up”

You changed his bandages for him every evening after that

“I can do this myself you know”

He said it with a light laugh

He was starting to get back on his feet and regained most of his movement and strength

“I know but...id like it if you would rely on me just a bit more. I know i cant do much but i can do this”

He didnt say anything back to you after that

In all honesty he didnt want to do it himself

Every time your hand even brushed over his skin it felt like he was on fire

Even the scars that have long since healed throbbed at your touch

His heart beat so hard against his chest that he was afraid that you could hear it

“There all done! Hope that wasnt too bad”

‘Dont smile at me’

‘Youre far too precious’

‘I dont know what ill do if you look at me like that’

He really was planning to let you go, he was fine with just keeping you at an arms length away but now he knew he was in too deep

You got up to put the first aid kit away but he quickly pulled you into his bed with him and he held you tight against his chest

His face was buried into the crook of your neck

He didnt know what he wanted anymore

He wanted to keep you safe but he couldnt guarantee that with him being in the mafia

He hated it

This life wasnt the one he wanted anymore

The life he wanted was with you

Slowly, he rose his head to look at you

“Run away with me y/n”

Your eyes widened in pure shock

“What...what did you just say?”

You couldnt believe what he just said

His eyes were serious though

“Run away with me. I dont want this life anymore. I want to give you the life you deserve. One filled with happiness and laughter where you dont have to worry about things like if ill come home the next day or not. One where you arent targeted. I love you y/n. I love you so much so please, run away with me or so help me god ill just take you”

He held you so tight that it felt like he might break at any sudden movement

You wrapped your arms around him and held him gently against you so you wouldnt hurt any of his wounds

“Then take me away”

That was all tanaka needed to let go of any reservations that were holding him back up

He kissed you with everything hes been bottling up until this moment

Your lungs burned as pulled away, both out of breath but hungry for more

“I hope you know Im not letting you go. Youre stuck with me now”

You laughed and kissed his forehead

“I wouldnt have it any other way”

That night was spent in each others arms, both of you longing for the others touch and neither of you wanting to be apart for even a second

Noya visited the apartment a few days later only to be met with complete silence

A knowing smile appeared on his face as he shook his head

He knew wherever you two were you were both happy

Because he knew you would keep your promise to him

[gigglz]

Not ticklish.

Hellooo! Im finally writing again! This is only my 2nd fic ever so be nice!

Also I didnt use any “ ‘ “ in this fic.. cuz i wrote this at 2am and was too lazy for that LMAO

Warnings: This is a tickle fic! So if you dont like that stuff dont read! No tickling is not always sexual! Pure fluff here!

Tony Stark x Reader

Ft. Bucky Barnes

Reader identifies as a girl and uses she/her pronouns! ( I will be making fics with other pronouns too! )

Im dont really like writing about being restraint and tickled, so this will probs be one of the only fics with this sort of stuff! Enjoy!! :D

Prompt: Tony asked if you wanned make yourself a suit, you were new to the Avengers team so Tony was helping you make it. Then something unexpected happened.

Word count: 1,389

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You were finally finished your training with Bucky.

You huffed, “Ugh! Finally! Im so tired!” You sat down on the living room couch and chugged your water.

“Oh come on! It wasnt that bad, plus you will have to get used to it.” Bucky ruffled your hair and went to the kitchen.

Bucky saw you as his little sister, he treated you like he has known you all his life. You liked it tho, you liked that he didnt treat you differently.

Then Tony walked in.

“Hey, kid! Sinse Peter just made his suit, ya want to make one too?” Tony knew you were gonna say yes because you have been begging him for ages.

“YES!” You stood up, you werent tired anymore. You were REALLY excited.

“Woah! What now? Not tired anymore?” Bucky yelled from the kitchen and laughed.

You scoffed and looked at Tony.

“So... you wanna make it or not? This is your only chance, kid.” Tony started to walk away.

“Wait! Now?” You were excited and followed Tony, “Oh, Wait! I need to grab something from my room!”

“Okay, ill be waiting for you in the lab!” Tony called out to you as you ran to your room.

You grabbed your sketchbook and ran back down.

You entered the lab, and looked around. You had never been here before, because you werent allowed in here.

“Woah... ehem. I have a sketch of my suit!” You had been working on your suit for months and you were really excited to make it.

“Hah, you came ready! Unlike Peter.” Tony laughed and took a look at your sketched suit.

You stared at Tony while he was examaning your design. You were worried he wouldnt like it.

“Woah, kid! This is pretty cool, but I do have some suggestions.”

You scoffed at Tony, he always found something to change, you didnt mind tho. 

“See this?” You nodded “I think this would look cooler, and work better too.” You watched as Tony sketched on some details, and made some little changes to your suit.

After a few minutes the design was done, and you had to say it looked AWESOME.

“Mkay! Were done! Ready to actually make it?” Tony looked at you with a smile.

“Yay! Yes im ready!” You ran to the big printer thingy, you werent really sure what it was, but you knew you had to stand in it.

“Well it looks like you know what youre doing.” Tony turned and started to push some buttons.

The machine started up, it scared you a little.

“This is so cool!” You exclaimed as you stuck your hands out so the machine could scan everything.

The machine started webbing thin material over your legs, you realized you couldnt move them.

“Uhm.. Tony? I cant move my legs, is this normal?” You looked up at Tony, his back was turned to you.

“Mhm yeah, its so you dont move and mess something up.” He was still tinkering with something on his desk.

“oh okay!” You wondered how Peter got thru this cuz you know he is very energetic, Tony was probably right on installing this feature.

The machine was up to your hips, still webbing around.

“Okay, the first layer is almost done. Hang in there Y/N.” Tony said, turning to you.

The machine was working fast, and was already up to your chest.

“So.. why is it wrapping me in this weird material, why not do the pattern and stuff?” You asked a little confused.

Tony walked to you cuz the machine finally was up to your neck and stopped.

“Its doing this so it can map out everything, and the patterns dont look weird and messed up.” As he said that he pushed a button on the machine, and it started ‘blowing’ off the accses of the material.

The preassure of the air hitting you legs tingled.

You tried to move your leg a little, but of course you couldnt.

Tony looked at you, sensing something was happening “The machine will blow off any access of the material, nothing to worry about, kid.”

“Ye-eah, got it.” You stuttered a little.

The machine reached your hips, and that tickled... like.. a lot.

“Ahagh!” You squealed.

Tony looked at you and raised his eyebrow, “What was that? You ok?” You heard a little of worry in his tone.

You tried to stiffle your laughter, “Yehes, im fine” You looked down, you were blushing a little.

The machine now was at your sides.

You tried to quirm away. But you couldnt hold the giggles in.

“You sure youre okay, ki-”

“HAH! Nahaha-” You cut Tony off with your giggles.

He didnt seem to get it.

“You.. whats so funny? Is it me?” He looked at you really confused.

“Nohoho! AGH! Ihits not youhuhu!” You were close to breaking out in full on laughter.

The machine passed your stomach and was at your ribs.

“AHAGH! Wahahait! NooOOoo! heHeheha!” You were now laughing.

Tony stared at you and put the peaces together.

“Kid, really? Youre ticklish?” Tony laughed at how you were reacting.

You shook your head, still laughing.

“So... youre not ticklish?” He smirked. “You sure? Cuz it doesnt seem like it to me.” Tony scoffed.

“Ihihim nohot!” You tried to protest.

“then why are you laughing, hm?” Tony tilted his head sassily.

The machine passed your ribs and arms, it was at your neck and then stopped so you werent laughing as hard anymore, but you were still recovering from the little tickle attack from the machine.

“Ihim not.. *huff*.. see? Im not even laughing!” You looked up at Tony, just to see him smirking and standing sassily.

“Yeah right. I think the suit can wait a little.. dont you agree?” Tony’s smirk became bigger.

You didnt know what he meant. “What? but wh- AH!” You felt a poke at your stomach, and looked at Tony again.

“Hm.. not ticklish, huh? Then you wouldnt really mind, im just checking if its ready for the pattern to be made.” Tony poked you again.

“But you said the suit could wAIT- TONY!”

Tony looked at you, acting confused.

“Whats wrong? Did I hurt you? Im sorry, now I have to check for wounds!” Tony started squeezing and prodding at your sides and stomach.

“GAH! TONY! Nahaha! Stahap!” You couldnt move at all, the only thing you could move was your head.

“Uh oh.. did you lie to me?! *gasp* You lied! You are ticklish!” He fake gasped and started squeezing your sides with both hands.

“AHAGH! TONY! Nohohooo! Okahay! I am tihicklish! Now stohohop!” You blushed when you said the t word.

“I KNEW IT! How dare you, Y/N! No one lies to me and gets away with it!” He started spidering all over your belly and sides.

You let out a loud belly laughter, Tony never really has heard you laugh like this before.

“Woahhh! Now what is this?” Tony started moving his fingers faster.

“AHA! NOHOHO! NOOOO!” You threw your head back, you couldnt take much more.

Tony felt that you were close to your limit, and wanned to do one last thing.

He leaned forward, and blew a big rasberry one the side of your neck.

Your laugh went silent, and Tony stopped.

You were still giggling from the ghost tingles that were still on your torso and neck.

“Hah! It sounds like someone is getting murdered. What happened? Tony, please tell me you didnt kill her.” Bucky walked in the lab.

“What, no! Shes fine.. see?” Tony pointed to you and held in a laugh when he saw your state.

“Ehehh.. ehh... *huff*.. im fi-fine!”

“What did you do?” Bucky laughed.

“Oh, just found out shes ti-”

“NOTHING- He did noting... im good.” You cut Tony off, obviously not wanting Bucky to know... cuz he would literally kill you.

Tony laughed.

“Okay, okay. Buck, get out.” Tony pointed to the door. “We have important business to attend to.”

“Fineee- just- dont kill her.. please?” Bucky said as he started to walk to the door.

You looked at Tony with puppy dog eyes, he looked at you too.

“I- yeah, of course, *ehem*, okay! Lets finish this suit!” Tony turned to his desk and pushed some buttons.

After like 40 minutes your suit was done, you were so excited. It looked amazing! You thanked Tony and ran to show everyone else.

Tony laughed at your excitment and watched you run out of the lab.

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Thank you for reading! Sorry if it was kinda short, im still working on my fics and figuring out how exactly to write them. <33

[mieczyhale]

you know what i could go for?? [late night ramble journey ahead // i did not re-read this so who knows!!]

an in-depth fic about klaus’s ten months in vietnam.. but with ben there. klaus getting pants and a gun shoved at him and ben is just as confused and freaked out. klaus finding out where they are, or ben finding out and telling him. klaus meeting dave and ben is sitting next to him, side eyeing dave because who is this soldier and why did he come all the way from the back of the bus to introduce himself. ben sees it / can tell when klaus shoves the briefcase under their seat right after and ben’s just like ‘are you fucking kidding me??’ and of course klaus would make stupid decisions because of an attractive man with a sweet smile. so he’s exasperated but also concerned because it’s 1968 and people like klaus are treated even worse now than they are in 2019, way worse, and all of these men are probably straight - dave included. and if any of them are gay they’re not gonna say anything let alone act on it. it wouldn’t be worth it. klaus could get himself hurt or killed just for being himself, if he acts too.. well.. himself after that he stays by klaus’s side more than he did in their own time, which is really saying something. offers advice and wisdom like he always has. he warns him about snipers and mines and bullets and in turn klaus warns his squad. ben can’t lie - it feels pretty fucking good to be responsible for saving lives without having to take any. he still wishes klaus would just try the briefcase, he has it, but at some point he stops pushing. because he does think klaus needs to go back and soon but everytime he brings it up klaus gets defensive and angry - he can do what he wants. he has friends here now. he has a family that actually likes him. that actually cares. he’s considered useful and important and he’s on drugs!! he can get high and none of them think any less of him for it. why can’t ben see that maybe this is where he belongs?? maybe the middle of the fucking vietnam war is where he fits?? and it’s not like he has anyone or anything back home. the only thing he could have missed is ben and ben’s with him in 1968 so there’s literally nothing. and ben wants to yell back, he wants to argue that there’s plenty for klaus to go back to, but he’s realizing that klaus.. might be right. and that hurts. and of course pisses ben off but it hurts because nobody should have to travel back in time and fight in a pointless war to find basic respect, especially not klaus. klaus who has been through enough - who deserves good things more than anyone ben knows. so after that conversation he doesn’t bring it up anymore. he looks at it sometimes, and thinks about their siblings, how they just gained their missing brother only to lose another, how are they doing? have they noticed klaus is missing yet? did they see the motel room?? did they know that all of that blood was klaus’s?? (shh patch didn’t die, hazel and cha cha escaped by knocking her out but she lives because i said so. diego shows up and finds her, freaks out at first but is relieved that she’s fine. he manages to get her to wake up and she tells him that klaus was there. he was hurt, very very hurt, but he got away. she doesn’t know where he went, he crawled through the vent, and he’s gone, diego. you need to find him - he needs a hospital. ahem anyway) ben thinks on these things and it never takes him long to get disgusted looking at it because it contains, in a way, their family. and he thinks he knows the answers. he gets to a point where he decides he wouldn’t be upset if they never had to see those jackasses again. his loyalties lie with klaus, after 13 years together there’s no way they wouldnt be. and if doing what’s best for klaus, doing what makes klaus happy, is staying right where they’ve found themselves than he can deal with it. that’s where he ends up anyway but its definitely not a quick or easy point to reach. he’s there for every battle, all the days of marching, watching klaus kill people and knowing how badly it’s affecting his brother and yet he doesn’t stop. he doesn’t pull back without orders, doesn’t put his gun down until he knows his squad is safe. and that fierceness grows as he gets closer to dave. ben doesn’t know what to think of dave at first, probably doesn’t trust him - knowing every man klaus has ever found attractive or had a “relationship” with before - but ben literally watches this - admittedly handsome - soldier boy fall in love with klaus, and klaus with him. ben witnesses the disco. the private conversation - from a distance, he’s doesn’t feel quite right listening in and he can still see them. the way they look at each other. how gently dave approaches every moment with klaus - the hand on his cheek, their first kiss (which he WILL tease klaus about later) when they head back to the hotel that was booked for all the guys for r&r, ben decides to wander saigon instead because he’s pretty sure he knows where things are going to go considering klaus and dave are roommates (oh my god they were roommates) by the time he gets back they’re both passed out (in the same bed. as he expected) from that day forward klaus is happy, genuinely happy in a way ben can’t remember him ever being, and dave has of course gained ben’s full approval (especially when klaus tells dave about the ghosts and dave believes him. even turns to where klaus is pointing at ben and tells ben that he’s happy that klaus has at least one good sibling, that he’s happy to know ben is there. when dave knows ben is there he always greets him. it’s not anything that grand really but it means a lot to ben. and when klaus finally tells him about the time travel, a little later on, dave believes him then too. said it made sense because he always thought there was no way someone as incredible as klaus could’ve come from the same place as he himself - let alone the same time. it never seemed to.. fit) SO ben is a fan. and he stays by both their sides - keeping them alive as best he can - along with a few other ghosts who are coherent, previous members of the 173rd, who pass things on to ben when klaus is too high. they talk, as long as no one but dave is around - dave who adapts pretty easily to klaus holding a whole conversation with someone he can’t see or hear. and ben.. stays ben. the only thing being in the war really changes is the way he views their siblings and he now has one other live person that he can “talk” to. eventually, almost 11 months in, they find out they’re getting sent to the frontlines. even closer to the danger. and klaus has a bad feeling. this is when ben brings up the briefcase again, hesitantly, and before klaus goes off reminds him that they could take dave with them. if he wanted to go. klaus can return to their time, to relative safety, and still have dave. it’s no longer a ‘one or the other’ situation. all they have to do is get dave to say ‘yes’. he says it very quickly of course (if you think i’d let dave die you’re out of your goddamn mind) he can be tough and feral when he needs to be, when pushed if klaus is in danger but he isn’t a killer, he doesn’t want to be a killer, he wants out. but he also wants a life with klaus and while they talked about going back to the states in.. well.. dave’s time and getting a little house and all that - doing that in 2019 sounds much better. especially after the night klaus told him softly about how things were different for lgbtq+ people, how they could hold hands and be as out as they wanted. get married. adopt. all things dave spent his whole life believing he’d never be allowed to have. so they do it - right then. klaus pulls out the briefcase and they gather the few things they wanted to keep and in a bright light they’re gone. (maybe they said something, or goodbye, to each squadmate before leaving. maybe they didnt and it hurt but if they waited around to get through everyone it would be too late to run) AND OH!! they take the ghost soldiers with them / the ghost soldiers find them in 2019, because i’m a slut for klaus having good ghosts, friend ghosts, who - even if they died horribly, are still the same person they were alive. and maybe sometimes they look like their deaths and sometimes they can look normal - ben teaching the soldiers how to be ghosts?? including how to appear as you were; whole, no holes or blood or missing limbs or chunks of head blown off. they’re all grateful and so is klaus. tho listen: he still gets high because i fucking said so - however, at least until the world is saved, he sticks to cigarettes and - for sleeping purposes - pot, dave does as well. because dave isnt a square. maybe he sticks to that path afterwards. maybe not. i for one support everything except 100% sobriety 100% of the time in this instance  anyway: later on when klaus can make ben corporeal for any amount of time he wants ben tells their siblings about the real life romantic drama he got to watch close up, from their first meeting all the way to the return to 2019. he also mentions a lot of things about the war, the sights and sounds of senseless murder - something their brother and his boyfriend were forced to take part in - the wounds they had to deal with, heal through. klaus and dave definitely have some scars. the fear. and that’s after telling them about hazel and cha cha and the almost two days they had klaus and nobody noticed. (maybe klaus lets his siblings meet the other soldiers, maybe not. maybe he lets them wander the mansion corporeal to scare the shit out of people. who knows) ben wants to make their siblings feel bad. he wants them to hurt and feel guilty. it’s the very least they deserve he thinks, when it’s all said and done. he hasn’t been able to say anything to them for 13 years and he’s got a lot of things built up - but gotta say, the last year (five-ish days?? starting at ep.1) have really taken the whole goddamn cake. klaus is embarrassed and shocked and actually quite touched that little benny is really going feral for the first time - though he keeps trying to tell him none of it is a big deal. he doesnt like confrontation. dave however is extremely pleased by the whole thing. klaus kept saying he and ben would get along if they ever got to meet and he was right. ben had, with a serious face, dubbed them the klaus hargreeves love & protection squad (bc dave doesnt know what the fuck even a ‘meem’ is yet) and that’s that. they make up a handshake and everything. klaus has never felt so loved. 

aaand eventually klaus and dave and ben (because of course he’s invited) do get that little house away from the city - someplace with few to no ghosts. someplace they can make their home. they make sure it has a room they can make up for ben even though he doesnt sleep (he still deserves his own space. a place to get away from them if he wants. somewhere to put his books and such. ben doesnt get emotional about that at all. absolutely not.) and they get pets and klaus gardens and ben reads books about gardening so he can help and dave works (mechanic is always a good time. or bookstore owner!! coffee shop?? listen. those may or may not be my favorite aus) and maybe the siblings get to visit and maybe they mend things and bond or whatever idk THE POINT IS:: Ben is a good brother and i think the idea of him going through vietnam with klaus is interesting and if someone with more ideas/thoughts ever wrote this i would be on that like cheese on broccoli honestly. THE SECOND POINT IS:: Klaus and Dave deserve to be happy and have the life they dreamed about together and if they shared their home with anyone it would be the Bentacles SO… OKAY…  that definitely did it’s own thing but i really really genuinely love thinking about what those months would have been like with ben there - what he would have thought or said or done about things yknow?? and how that would have affected klaus/changed things. i didnt give a lot of examples in this because my brain didn’t want to stay on track (as if it ever does) but it’s 1:30 in the morning and im so fucking tired lsdfd;lk if you actually read this.. first of all: im sorry. second of all: thank you. and literally if anyone ever wrote something about this topic (not like.. this post specifically, just the ben in vietnam plot) and nobody important dies i’ll love you and give you a lil smooch on the noggin  s m ooch. smooches. you know who likes smooches?? klaus. you know who deserves smooches?? klaus. you know who’s getting smooches?? THAT’S RIGHT. KLAUS. because dave has a degree in giving them and he can’t let that education go to waste amiright??

this post.. may or may not have been brought to you by wine as well.. 

ope

[spooks-can-write]

The Babysitter

Nestor x Reader

Summary: Emily hires you to babysit Cristobal (this is apart from the actual tv series events) and you and Nestor have some...tension. im bad at summaries ok.

Warnings: no smut just tension lmao. Cursing. Some predatory behavior, nothing beyond that.

Word count: idk tbh its longER tho bc i cant be short im s o r r y.

Hope yall enjoy 💞

The door chimed as you walked into the coffee shop, immediatley seeing Emily beam as she saw you made you loose a tension you didnt know you were holding. After leaving your last job abruptly you had been busy trying to get your shit together and through the struggle you were glad to take a break to see your old babysitter and childhood friend Emily.

"Hey (y/n)!" She stood up, you noted motherhood suited her well. She seemed more at peace now.

"Hey Em!" You looked down to see Cristobal sweetly sleeping in his noteably expensive stroller.

"So..." she seemed eager "I was talking with Miguel and we know you're...well...looking for a new job and place to stay so we thought it'd be perfect if you stayed with us as Cristobals full time nanny."

You were caught off gaurd to say the least "Oh, uh that does sounds great but i dont have any experience really."

"Dont worry well figure it out and ill be there in the beginning till you settle in. Trust me."

You thought you didnt have many other places to go either way and being in a stable enviornment would be good for a change. Fuck it.

"When can i start?"

Nannying was going better than you thought. It helped that Cristobal was more than well behaved but also you kind of had a knack for it. Not to mention the mansion Emily lived in. The only problem from time to time was that asshole with the cornrows. He always blatantly ignored you or just stared at you until you left the room. You thought long and hard about what you did to piss him off and couldnt think of a single thing, so you decided he was just an asshole.

You needed to check with Miguel about taking Cristobal to the park, going to his office you just found Nestor standing next to an empty desk.

"Where is Miguel?"

He didnt respond.

"Where.Is.Miguel?" You ask with more attitude than you meant.

He blinked like he didnt understand.

"Nestor!" You raised your voice

"He stepped out. He'll be back in 10." His calm tone didnt match yours. You instantly felt embaressed to have been rude. Shit.

"Thanks" you walked out wishing you had been more calm

--------------------------

When you walked in he looked up, thinking it was miguel, to see you. You were wearing that new top he liked. It hugged your curves. The sun was hitting your face making you glow.

Fuck you were beautiful. He wanted to shove the chair out of the way and grab you and kiss you more than he ever wanted anything he knew he couldnt have.

Shit. You looked mad.

"Nestor!"

He gathered his thoughts

He watched you walk out. His stomach twisted that you seemed mad at him. Fuck.

----------------------

They were supposed to be gone all day so you were walking around the house, bouncing and humming a hymn to Cristobal in your pjs. He slowly fell asleep as you walked around the stairs to the den, you stopped dead.

You were met with the eyes of Miguel, Devante, Nestor, and a fair skinned man with a lot of jewlery and a shit eating grin as his eyes obviosuly roamed your body. You were just wearing a little bit too short of shorts and a tank top that cristobals sleepy hand was tugging down. You felt your stomach twist and cheeks flush.

"Sorry-I I didnt know anyone was home, he was getting fussy so.." you trailed off as Miguel stood up giving you a look you couldnt read. You looked over to Nestor and he looked upset.

"Dont worry mija we were just finishing up." Miguel said, like he meant it.

"Actually" the strange man stood, still undressing you with his eyes. It was starting to piss you off.

"Miguelito i think we should wait till my party next saturday to...finalize this deal huh?" He said with that same grin.

"Por supuesto" miguel said as he ushered the man to the other side of the room, talking to each other in spanish too quiet for you to decipher.

You felt stuck in your place. You focused on Cristobals breath against your chest. Trying to let it calm you. You noted more of the man. He looked dangerous. Emily told you Miguel was a international businessman and you believed her till you came here. You werent stupid enough to ask exactly what he did but you also werent stupid enough to believe he was just a businessman either.

The men came back and stood in front of you for a beat.

"Hey listen im really sorry i thought everyone was gone-" you started

"No worries chiquita, but do you have a passport?" Devante asked, eyebrow raised

-----------------------------

"Well if im being whored out i mine as well look good right?" You said smoothing down the soft rose gold satin dress as Emily and Dita sang your praises.

"How many times do i have to tell you (y/n) he just told Miguel he wanted to see you at the party, hes not going to do anything and we won't let him anyways." Emily reassured you, doing your hair.

"You're a part of the family now mija, this is our job as the women." You knew that comment was true, you saw it with your own eyes and that made it sting even more.

You were doing it for the sake of Emily and her family you told yourself. Plus you did look amazing in the dress.

You tugged at the zipper of the dress, it wouldn't budge.

"Hey em, can you-" you turned to see nestor at the door.

"I can if you want" his voice was gentle. Not that he was ever callous with you but it felt deliberate.

"Yeah sure" you half whispered, surprised it got caught in your throat.

He walked over. You moved your hair in front as he gently pulled the zipper up. Touching it when he was done. You turned.

"Listo?" He asked

You nodded, following. Feeling a flutter in your chest.

The drive to mexico was beautiful and serene. You mind did wander to Nestor and how sweet he was to you. You wondered if it was a fluke. Maybe he felt sorry for you. You tried not. to feel sorry for yourself.

You arrived to what looked like a castle. It had the guards with machine guns and everything. You found humor in that, as the situation sank in, you weren't scared.

It you were honest with yourself even when Nestor was cold to you, you always felt safe with him.

You all got out of the car, you last, as Nestor helped you onto the uneven stones. It'd been a minute since you wore heels.

"Dont worry." He leaned down to talk close to you, squeezing your hand. You met his smile.

The music was loud as you walked in. People were dancing and the mariachis were amazing. You were thankful to sit next to emily and dita. You felt eyes on you from men and their wives. You tugged your dress up. Definitley not the most revealing at the party but apparently it was enough.

"Its because you are not married" Dita told you, a comforting hand on your shoulder. "They are jealous" She smiled. It didnt make you feel better. You tried to focus on the drink in front of you.

The man from the house yelled joyfully and drunkenly in spanish and started walking toward the table. The men quickly stood up and met him halfway. Ushering him into a private room smoothly. Not before you made eye contact and he winked. You held your shudder.

The night went on and you found yourself almost having fun and forgetting the dangerous people around you.

You went to the bathroom as Devante and Dita danced.

You were looking for the bathroom when you felt a heavy hand on your waist. You jumped and turned. It was the man.

"Hello pretty women" he said with a accent slurred with the smell of strong alcohol that pinched your nose.

You backed up to find yourself against a wall. You started to look for a way out but his hand got harder on your waist, moving to hold your hip.

He leaned in speaking breathy spanish against your ear you couldnt understand on your best day. You took the opportunity to side step, noticing his henchmen about 10 ft away watching, glocks on their hips. The situation sank your stomach. You wouldnt be getting out of here.

"(Y/n) ive been looking everwhere for you." Dita shuffled past the man grabbing your arm and pulling you away. "Miguel needs to talk with you." She said louder than necesarry.

You were at a near jog down the hall. She stopped and turned you when you were safely away but not into the main area.

"Are you okay mija?" She held your hand. You felt tears welling.

"Men like that will ways exist and here, you will find them in abundance. It's important to stay close to us. They prey on the lone wolf okay?" You nodded. She wiped the tear you didnt know you shed.

She stayed with you till you calmed down.

"Brave face mija" she said as you walked back into the room, back to the table. Nestor and miguel were there looking directly at you, worried, trying to read your face. You forced a smile. Understanding what being in this family meant. It wasnt good. It wasnt bad. It was just your life now.

Nestor quickly sat next to you. Emily eyeing you, sympathetically. They were all too smart to not put together what happened. She touched your thigh, you flinched. She removed it. You could see she made a heartbroken face out the corner of your eyr but you couldnt bring yourself to meet her eyes.

"Im okay i promise. Just..shook up" you were honest. She nodded. You knew she felt terrible.

The night continued. Nestor wanted to kill him and he knew how he would do it. He shared looks with Miguel. He shook his head. Not yet. The second you walked out, holding ditas arm like it was the only thing keeping you up his stomach twisted. Rage ran down his back.

When he didnt see that bastard Diego and didnt see you, his mind raced and he was about to go down the hall to kill that fuck when Dita grabbed him.

"You can't. It has to be me." She didnt have to explain. He knew why. It killed him to turn around and walk away from the situation as his mind let dark thoughts in of what he was doing to you.

He kept looking at you, he could see you trying to be brave but under the table your leg was shaking and you were fidgeting with your hands.

"Come outside with me baby" he leaned over so only you could hear him.

You looked over at him standing with his hand out. You were thankful. Did he just call you baby? It sounded good coming out of his mouth.

You took his hand. It was calloused and strong. It calmed you down almost instantly as he led you outside. When people saw him coming they almost fell over themselves to move out of your way.

The cool air felt good on your flushed cheeks. He let go of your hand and led you to the balcony. You leaned on it, embracing the night air.

"Its really beautiful out here, all things considered." You chuckled.

He looked worringly at you, "Thank you Nestor." You grabbed his arm.

Fuck, his name sounded so good in your mouth.

"You're welcome." He watched as you leaned against the balcony. He wanted to touch you, tell you, youre beautiful but after what happened thats not what you needed and he knew it.

-------------------

You stayed like that for awhile, in each other's silence. The muffled sound of the mariachis relaxing you.

You felt your eyes getting heavy.

"Dont get tired now its not even 1am yet." You looked over, surprised he noticed.

"Maybe we can just stay out here all night then." You smiled at him.

Fuck he would do just about anything you asked. Crawl on glass in the snow, change your oil, anything as long as you kept smiling at him like that.

"But it's probably best to go inside right?" You sighed.

"I think so."

You grabbed his arm as you walked in, holding onto him and keeping your eyes on the table.

Time passed and you struggled to stay awake, you leaned on Nestor's shoulder without thinking, you froze. He moved over to make you more comfortable, moving his arm around you but not too much. You snuggled in. Damn he smelled good too. You closed your eyes, feeling people looking. Fuck em.

You were stirred up by Nestor rubbing your upper arm "hey, hey, time to go."

You stirred, never really falling asleep but not present for the end. Everyone was filing out slowly.

Nestor was looking over to Miguel and Diego. He shook Miguel's hand. He didn't look away as he put his coat over your shoulders and walked you all out.

You noticed Emily smirking at you, making eyes at Nestor's jacket around you.

You tried to open your mouth

"-Ah." She cut you off. "You don't need to tell me anything." She smiled.

You smiled back, happily getting in the warm car and doozing on and off on the way home, catching Nestor look at you in the rearview mirror made you blush.

You all made your way inside as you felt the emotional fatigue of the day in your legs.

Nestor was waiting by the front door. Not for you it seemed. Just taking a moment.

"Can i be out here with you for awhile?" You asked, ready for him to say anything.

"Yeah."

"Thanks for tonight, for taking care of me."

"I know you can take care of yourself (y/n). I just didn't want you to feel alone out there." He spoke softly, sitting next to you.

You stared at his face for the first time it seemed. He was beautiful. You dared to glance down at his lips.

He followed your eyes. He wouldn't move qn inch on you tonight. He didnt want to chance pushing you but fuck did he want you so bad.

You weren't used to initiating, you could see he wanted you but wouldnt move. You closed the distance, stopping just short to see if he'd react.

His head just barely titled up towards you, you took it and kissed him, you being the one to take control felt good. You wondered if he was usually like this.

He was gentle and sweet and you found yourself appreciating it tonight. You grabbed his face and you deepened the kiss.

You felt brave and stood up and sat down to straddle him. He grunted in the back of his throat as you grabbed his braid he moved his hands to hold your thigh and ass.

The kiss slowed down and he smiled into it. You laughed, dropping your head into his shoulder, touching your lips.

"Wow uh-" you got off him, laughing with him.

"Yeah" he laughed, grabbing your hand. "Let's go inside."

He dropped you off at your room which felt cute and a little ridiculous. It was fitting.

Words failed you and it seemed to him, as well.

"Goodnight." He said softly again.

"Good night Nestor." You replied closing your door, silently congratulating yourself for not dragging him into your room.

Whatever, give it a week. You smiled.

[whatbutandreil]

i had an ask sitting in my inbox for a couple of months bc i didn't really know what i wanted to say, but i lost the ask:/

unfortunately, when i tried to save my response to my drafts, tumblr just,, fuckin deleted it, so im sorry to whoever asked it:/ but i have my response now. the ask said "what(or who) got you into tfc?" to the person who asked this question, thank you. this has been a really great reflection. so uh,, here's my answer:

·

i kinda hate the way i came into tfc bc it was in a way that didn't respect the wishes of my, now friend on twitter, ziegenkind.

·

basically, i was scrolling on pinterest, as you do, and i fell into a hole of like,, gay fanart? (not a question, just a little self-reflection on how fucking queer i am. how did i not fucking know?)

·

anyway, so, i was scrolling, as you do, and i found @ziegenkind 's stunning painting of andrew and neil on the bottom bunk of the dorm bed (y'all know the one) and i was like "whooooo,, the fUCk are these two cuties (ʘ‿ʘ)??"

·

PSA : DONT REPOST PEOPLE'S ART WITHOUT THEIR PERMISSION, ESPECIALLY IF SOMEONE EXPLICITLY SAYS NOT TO. THIS COUNTS AS REPOSTING IF YOU POST SOMEONE ELSE'S ART TO PINTEREST, INSTAGRAM, TUMBLR, TWITTER, FACEBOOK, ANY SOCIAL MEDIA. DO NOT QRT PEOPLE'S ART ON TWITTER IF PEOPLE SAY NO. YOU ARE NO EXCEPTION. AND DONT FUCKING ERASE PEOPLE'S WATERMARKS AND DEFINITELY DONT REPLACE THEM WITH YOUR OWN. DONT FUCKING DO IT. to the lovely ziegenkind, (it's julian from twitter (^o^)丿) it's so fuckin unfortunate that i found your art through reposts and it's fucking horrible that people don't listen, but thank you for being my bridge into this fandom and im very grateful to have found you and been able to talk with such an angel. you quite literally changed my life forever and i can't thank you enough:') im eternally grateful for that. BUT DONT FUCKING REPOST DIPSHITS

·

anyway, so, naturally, i sat in my bed for 3 hours at 1am on a school night, as you do, scrolling through andreil fan art and trying to figure out who the fUCK they were and what they were from. i found tfc and immediately downloaded it on my phone

·

i didn't get to reading it for a bit tho:/ abt a week later, i was brought to the emergency room bc i was planning to kill myself. id been diagnosed with depression for around a year, who knows how long i was suffering before that, and i was hitting my lowest. it was abt 2 weeks after new years and on new years eve, i was planning on ending it bc i couldn't fathom dealing with it for another year. another year of feeling nothing or everything all at once. but my mom had called me downstairs to go to a new years party, so i didn't go through with it. abt 2 weeks later, i had seen my therapist again, and i was deflecting hard core, and she saw it, and she sent me to the ER. i was evaluated all night, but i wasn't kept for observation since i told the nurse that the thoughts had passed. i was taken out of school and put in an outpatient program where id have group for 4 hours and school for 2. every morning for abt a month, i would get picked up at my house in a minivan and id have a good 20-25+ min drive to program.

·

every. single. morning. on the van, i would read tfc. every morning. i was going through, what i thought to be the worst time of my life (i now know that it in fact DID get worse and now we're going on a new level of bad, but then it was the worst id experienced) every morning i was reading about neil and him running from his father, something ive wanted to do for years. reading about andrew struggling with depression and self harm like i am and despising most touches bc of people in his life that ruined it, similar to how someone ruined it for me and doesn't understand that "no" means "no". reading about nicky learning to love and accept himself for being gay, for being who he is like ive been trying to accept myself being a queer ace trans boy. reading about kevin trying to cope with his anxiety, even if it's in an unhealthy way, the same way i do. reading about renee growing up one way and wanting to become a better person, something that i want to do every day. reading abt matt overcoming his addiction and loving his friends with his whole heart. reading about dan standing up for herself and being proud of who she is. reading abt allison cutting away the people in her life who wanted to hold her back. reading about aaron and andrew work through their differences to try and salvage their relationship. reading about neil taking his life back and living it the way he wants, on his terms, like i so badly crave to do. reading about neil and andrew finding a respectful and loving relationship, one where all boundaries are respected, not crossed, where there is comfort in being together and a certain understanding on a level that others could never wrap their mind around. the kind of relationship that i have always, always, yearned for, where i feel safe and loved and respected.

·

these books taught me not only to die for the ones i love or kill for them, but to live for them, and to me, that is a much more daunting and difficult task.

·

All For the Game gave me hope, something i never thought id have again. it gave me hope for tomorrow. and the day after that. and a month after that. and it gives me hope that one day, i will get away from my father, i will be comfortable with who i am and love myself for it, i will find ways to cope with my anxiety properly, i will be proud of the person i have become, i will have friends who i love and who love me, i will stand up for myself and be proud to be the person ive become, i will surround myself with good people and cut away those who treat me wrong and hold me back, i will work to repair and maintain good relationships.

·

it gives me hope that i will finally break away from the pain and start to live my life the way i want, as the person i was meant to be, the way i was meant to live my life.

·

it gives me hope that i will overcome my depression, that i will find the strength to stop harming myself to cope, that i will find the strength to push through, even after ive been given every reason to just give up.

·

it gives me hope that one day, i will find a person who will love me for who i am, love me despite my past and the scars i carry, love me in a way that i'll never be able to explain or understand. that i will find someone who respects my boundaries, who asks "yes or no?" before touching me, who respects if i say "no" and still fucking loves me regardless. someone who can feel like they can be completely themself around me, and that i can feel the same around them. someone who will fall in love with me a little more every day. someone who i'll fall in love with a little more every day.

·

it gives me hope that one day, hopefully someday soon—but i think im willing to wait—i will be happy.

·

All For the Game quite literally changed to course of my life, and i can say with confidence that without it, i would not be here right now.

·

people say that books and shows and movies change there life all the time, but i know that i wouldn't be here without it. these books saved my fucking life. i wouldn't have experienced those mornings, walking into program with a goofy smile on my face, practically vibrating with what i now know was joy, blabbing to every person i ran into that morning abt a boy with scars and a sharp tongue on the run and the small, depressed and angry blond who told him to stay. or nights when i sobbed and sobbed for those boys who deserved better. and i wouldn't have gotten black armbands to cover my scars and match with my two biggest inspirations. or when i have a bad impulsive thought, i wouldnt have a voice in the back of my head going "what would andrew say? what would neil say?" and the vivid image of the small blond giving me a stare, face carefully blank, yet eyes swimming with a mix between disapproval and hope, and the boy covered in scars tentatively giving me a hug, a bit awkward at first, but he's a lovely hugger and eventually, awkwardness turns into comfort. without it, i don't think id know what pure, honest love is supposed to look like.

·

sorry, i suppose this got quite a bit off track from what got me into aftg, but once i started writing, i couldn't stop.

·

TLDR; i saw fanart on pinterest, DONT REPOST ART WITHOUT PERMISSION, and my life was saved and changed for the better by a book that i stumbled upon, purely by chance.

·

i don't believe in fate, but i do think that i found these books for a reason, and that my life changed because of it. i suppose you could call it the butterfly effect.

[teresa60521-blog]

Side Effects

chapter 19: 2 weeks

If Uraraka felt trapped in the Bakugou home before giving birth, she definitely felt trapped now. But she was glad that she wasn’t thrust into the chaos of the outside world and that she was wrapped up with this tiny bundle of joy who just so happened to cry and whine half of the day.

Uraraka would be lying if she said she wasn’t enjoying it.

She liked having somebody being dependent on her and  being able to take care of somebody. She had been told in the past that she has a motherly quality about her but she didn’t see it until she actually became a mother. It still didn’t feel real. Uraraka felt like she would be giving the baby back to somebody.

It was also nice that Masaru and Mitsuki believed in her parenting abilities. They didn’t hover, only lent her a hand when she asked for the help. They were always ready and willing to assist, Mitsuki more so since she was home most of the time unless she was running errands or having lunch with old friends. Masaru still worked, coming home late but always making time to say hello to his grandchild.

When Uraraka had asked them if they wanted her to leave, Mitsuki had looked at her like she was insane.

“Where are you gonna go?” Mitsuki had asked and truthfully, Uraraka hadn’t even thought that far. She had just wanted to get out of their hair. “You’re welcome here for as long as you like. Better you than my son.”

Uraraka had laughed but it was greatly appreciated. She finally belonged somewhere.

She just wished that Bakugou had stayed with them too the past few weeks.

She understood completely; school was still the most important thing to Bakugou. He still was driven to become a hero and having a baby didn’t affect him as much as it did Uraraka. She was still recovering, the pain mostly gone but her emotions still off kilter. Uraraka wanted to start shaving off some of the excess baby weight but she had to wait until she was all healed. Bakugou’s life didn’t have to slam on the breaks; he was just able to keep on going like nothing had happened.

Uraraka was thankful that he kept in constant contact, asking about Kazumi and how both she and the baby were doing. He was making up for the time he had lost during the pregnancy and that was all Uraraka really wanted. It would just be better if he was actually there with her.

He had come home the first weekend and with this next weekend rapidly approaching, Uraraka couldn’t wait to see him again. She just wanted a little help and a little bit of family bonding time. Because that’s what they were. A family.

Friday before Bakugou was due home Uraraka was sitting on the couch, holding Kazumi close to her chest. Kazumi was sleeping, had fallen asleep in her arms after drinking from her bottle, and Uraraka couldn’t find it in herself to put her baby girl down. Just two short weeks after she had given birth she was head over heels in love with her daughter. She understood what some new mothers said when it was the best feeling and experience in the world.

Uraraka felt her phone buzz against her leg and she made sure Kazumi was secure in one arm before opening the text.

>> these asshole wont leave me the fuck alone

Uraraka smiled as she read the text. She had gotten similar texts from Bakugou over the course of the week, him complaining about how their classmates wanted to come see the baby and how they hovered asking for pictures. She didn’t mind if they came over to meet Kazumi, she just didn’t want to overwhelm the infant with too many people and if the whole class came over it would be a lot . But she didn’t mind a few people coming over.

Bakugou was pretty adamant about them not coming over though. In fact, he said they were never ever allowed in his house again.

<< why?

>> they wanna fuckin come over even tho ive told them 100000000000 times hell fuckin no

<< maybe it’s easier to just say yes?

<< i wouldnt mind it if they came over

There was silence from Bakugou now and she knew he was pissed that she had disagreed with him. She just shook her head and let him fume in silence, putting the phone down beside her. In that moment Masaru sat down on the other side of the couch with the newspaper. He smiled gently at her and then glanced down at Kazumi through his glasses.

“How is she?” Masaru asked as he settled against the back of the couch. His voice was gentle, quiet so he didn’t wake the sleeping infant up.

Uraraka shifted Kazumi in her arms and the baby twitched, making a purring noise in the back of her throat and shaking her head. Uraraka rocked her a little bit until she settled down and was lying still in her arms again.

“Sleepy.” Uraraka smiled softly and rubbed her thumb across the back of Kazumi’s hand. She could already see growth in her baby and she thought it was amazing.

“Mm.” Masaru unfolded the newspaper. “And how are you doing?”

“I’m also sleepy. But happy. Much happier than I was when I was pregnant.”

“I told you Katsuki would come around.” Masaru sounded so proud of himself and Uraraka couldn’t even be mad. He was right and there was no denying that. Uraraka wished she had a little more faith when he had initially said this to her but everything that happening at the time led her to believe otherwise. Bakugou was being really rude and just downright awful. Uraraka didn’t think she was going to have a happy ending.

The future was still uncertain but for now, she was living the happy ending fantasy.

“I’m glad he did.” Uraraka whispered. She checked her phone again but there was still no message from Bakugou. She let it go, knowing this was nothing to get upset about. He could not respond to her and she would be fine with it. She spent a little more time with Masaru, talking about Bakugou and Kazumi and a little bit of Masaru’s job. He was still a fashion designer and he did in fact create some hero costumes. They weren’t worn by super popular heroes by any means but it still made him feel good to know that there were young heroes out there wearing the clothes he designed.

Uraraka told him maybe she would get her clothing reworked by him, but Masaru reminded her that technically she and Bakugou had matching designs as they were made by the same designer. Their costumes had predicted their love perhaps.

She carried Kazumi carefully upstairs and laid her in the bassinet beside her bed. She didn’t know when she was supposed to move Kazumi to her crib but she figured she had a couple of months. She wasn’t ready for her baby to grow that big yet. She liked rolling over in the morning and seeing Kazumi sleeping peacefully surrounded by the baby blanket her friends had made.

Uraraka fell asleep pretty quickly that night, having been up early that morning with her little girl. Kazumi woke her up once or twice in the middle of the night and Uraraka was still getting used to that. Hopefully Bakugou could come relieve her in the middle of the night tomorrow. However, the two still weren’t allowed to sleep in the same room and there were no chances that Bakugou would hear Kazumi in the first place. Bakugou was surprisingly a heavy sleeper, but so was Uraraka. She wondered when that would catch up to her. When there was a baby screaming two feet away from her though, it was hard to miss.

Kazumi woke her up at around eight and she was fed and changed, put into a cute baby blue onesie with clouds on it. Uraraka had specifically told Masaru and Mitsuki that she didn’t care about color of clothing for her daughter and didn’t want her daughter to be subjected to the gender dichotomy at two weeks old. Colors didn’t have gender and she was going to dress her daughter up however she wanted.

Kazumi just so happened to look very cute in blue.

Uraraka was just lifting Kazumi from her playpen when the front door swung open, hitting the wall with a loud thud. She blinked wide eyes in that direction and a fuming Bakugou emerged, one fist clenched tight at his side and the other palm flat on the door. Uraraka could see his fist trembling in fury from her position in the middle of the living room.

“Katsuki?” Uraraka’s eyebrows pinched together.

“Uraraka-san!” That did not come from Bakugou, as Bakugou would never be that formal. Instead, it came from three distinct voices, each belonging to Kirishima, Midoriya and Iida respectively.

Well, that explains why Bakugou was so annoyed.

Kirishima, followed by Kaminari, bounded in around Bakugou who seemingly had been trying to block their entrance. He was no match for Kirishima’s mass of muscle though and the two came forward, Iida, Midoriya and Tsuyu following right behind that. Uraraka was still a bit shocked and looked at the familiar faces.

“Oh, hi guys.” It took her a moment to compose herself but when she did she smiled. Kazumi was secure in her arms, awake and blinking big eyes up at her mother. Uraraka let her baby put her tiny hand around one of her fingers but kept her attention on her friends. She had undone the paws on the onesie she was wearing, her other hand still covered so she didn’t scratch herself in her sleep or when she was just wiggling around.

Uraraka was definitely surprised though to see so many of the faces she missed. She hadn’t had much interaction outside of Bakugou and his family, their family. Seeing her friends from school made her light up and feel warm inside. She could have only predicted how the train ride over to their house had been, especially with Kirishima and Kaminari coming along.

“We have come to see how you’ve been doing.” Iida said, glancing from her to Kazumi and then back to Uraraka’s face. She thought it was amusing, knowing he wanted to hold the baby immediately.

“They fucking stalked me here.” Bakugou gruffed and sat down on the couch, holding his arms out for Kazumi. Uraraka graciously placed her in his arms and Bakugou held the baby possessively against his chest, glaring at the faces of their classmates.

“You said we could come!” Kaminari shouted and Bakugou bared his teeth, holding Kazumi closer when she started squirming a bit.

“Shut the fuck up.” Bakugou spit.

Uraraka felt an incredible amount of pride seeing Bakugou being so protective over their daughter. It was almost surreal, him being so gentle when he was always so brash. He held Kazumi like she was delicate china and really, she was. “Be sure not to squish her.” Uraraka reminded and Bakugou shifted his grip on her, no complaints.

It was amazing how parenthood could change somebody, even if that parent wasn’t around as often as the other.

Kirishima poked his head real close to Kazumi’s. “She’s so small.”

“She’s a baby you fuckwit! Don’t get too close, if you breathe on her she’ll die.”

“She will not die.” Iida declared and began rummaging in his bag. “It is very important that we clean our hands before we hold the baby so it doesn't get any illnesses we may be carrying.”

“Who the hell said I was going to let you hold her, Four Eyes?!” Bakugou barked but it seemed like all of them ignored him as they squirted hand sanitizer into their hands. Uraraka didn’t have any gripes about letting the five of them hold Kazumi but her boyfriend looked like he was about to snap at anybody who came in a five foot radius of him.

Uraraka placed a hand on his shoulder and Bakugou jolted at the soft touch. “They can hold her.”

“They’re all fucking idiots, they’ll drop her!” Bakugou argued.

Tsuyu ribbited and placed a finger to her lips. “I thought fatherhood might mellow you out, Bakugou-kun, but looks like I was wrong.”

“A-Asui-san….” Midoriya said nervously.

Bakugou looked like he wanted to lunge but the baby in his arms kept him seated. He never had any problems picking a fight with any gender.

“Katsuki, they came all this way to see her.” Uraraka didn’t want to have to wrestle Kazumi out of his arms but would if he didn’t give their friends a chance to hold her. They held each other’s eyes in an aggressive gaze for a couple of beats before Bakugou sighed and relinquished his short hold on her. Uraraka lifted her and rounded the couch, bringing her to the center of the little semicircle their friends had created.

“This is Bakugou Kazumi.” Uraraka introduced with a soft smile. All of their mouths dropped in awe as they stared at the tiny wrinkled creature in her arms. Kazumi’s eyes were half open and she couldn’t decided who to focus on, so many new faces beginning to overwhelm her.

“Who wants to be the first to hold her?” Uraraka asked, ignoring the sharp intake of breath coming from the blonde behind her.

“Me, me, me!” Kirishima was bouncing excitedly.

“You better sit the fuck down.” Bakugou warned, spreading out on the couch so Kirishima had no choice but to sit in the armchair. “If you drop her it’ll be the last thing you do.”

Kirishima pouted but sat down in the chair, holding his arms out. Uraraka instructed him on how to properly support her and laid her in his arms, watching Kirishima’s face morph from excitement to nervousness.

“I can’t do this.” Kirishima said immediately, looking down at her face.

Uraraka laughed and kneeled in front of him. “Don’t want to hold her anymore?”

“No, I’m gonna drop her, please-” Uraraka lifted the baby from his arms and Kirishima fell back with a dramatic sigh. “That was too much pressure.”

“Fucking piss baby.” Bakugou mumbled under his breath.

“I would like a turn!” Iida raised his hand high and then placed it tight by his side when Uraraka rose onto the balls of her face and walked over to him. She repeated what she had told Kirishima, saying the same thing to both Kaminari and Tsuyu after they were done holding Kazumi. Bakugou had put up a strong fight about Kaminari holding Kazumi because of the nature of his quirk. He didn’t want her to accidentally zap her and in all honesty Uraraka was a little nervous about that too.

“I have perfect control of my quirk!” Kaminari sniffed and Uraraka sighed, allowing him to hold her. There were no shocks present and it seemed like Kazumi enjoyed being in his arms most, eyes widening as Kaminari blew raspberries at her. She couldn’t smile yet but Uraraka had no doubt that if Kazumi could, she would be the smiliest baby ever. Uraraka couldn’t wait to see her baby girl smile.

Things boiled over when Uraraka went to place Kazumi in Midoriya’s arms.

“Absolutely not.” Bakugou stood and got in between them. Midoriya blinked up at Bakugou and Uraraka sighed. She knew Bakugou would be childish over this.

“Katsuki-”

“I’m not going to let my daughter be tainted by this fucking nerd.”

“Kacchan-”

“If the only insult you can come up with is ‘nerd’ then I think your opinion is overridden.” Tsuyu said matter of factly.

“Did I ask for your opinion you goddamn toad?” Bakugou said, not even casting her a glance.

“Hey!” Uraraka frowned and bounced Kazumi a little when she noticed her face scrunching up, getting ready to start wailing. “If you’re going to be nasty then you leave. You’re not the only one who gets to make decisions about my daughter. And since you didn’t even want her in the first place, you shouldn’t even get a say!” She knew that she was playing dirty and the hurt that flashed through fiery irises made her chest clench. But all Bakugou did was turn around and stomp up the stairs.

With an exhale, Uraraka turned once more to Midoriya with her usual gentle smile on her face. “Do you still want to hold her?”

Midoriya nervously glanced at the staircase. Uraraka knew he was waiting for Bakugou to pop back out and start screaming at him, but it didn’t come. “Oh no, no, no, I don’t think th-that’s such a good idea.”

Uraraka smiled and kissed Kazumi’s head. She had calmed down, no waterworks, only curious eyes scanning the room and landing on Midoriya’s face. The two shared a look and Midoriya squared his shoulders like he was preparing for an epic battle.

“I’ll hold her.” Midoriya decided.

Uraraka gently laid her in his arms and Midoriya was clearly nervous but he cradled her as he had heard the others be instructed. Supporting her head, supporting her bottom, holding her securely but not too tight. He was a natural. Again, Uraraka wondered what he would be like as a parent. But he wasn’t the one who held her heart. The one who did was sulking upstairs, trying to control his emotions.

“She looks like Kacchan.” Midoriya mused.

“Well she is his daughter.” Uraraka stated with a little laugh.

“A miracle, truly.” Kaminari mumbled and Kirishima elbowed him in the ribs, telling him not to be a dick. Uraraka was kind of grateful for that. She knew she made a poor choice though it was the right choice for her. She and Bakugou fit together like two puzzle pieces; perfectly.

Midoriya held Kazumi for a little while before returning her to Uraraka’s arms. She started crying a little, fake tears, tears that said she didn’t want to leave the warmth of Midoriya’s embrace. Uraraka placed a pacifier in her mouth and wiped her tears, cooing at her daughter. When she looked up, all five of her classmates were looking at her with a strange expression on their faces.

“What is it?” Uraraka asked nervously.

Iida cleared his throat. “You have changed, Uraraka.”

Uraraka’s smile was wavering. “Is that good or bad?”

Iida shook his head. “It is very good. You are happy and that is all that matters to us. You deserve happiness.”

Uraraka’s brown eyes watered and she closed them for a moment, regaining her composure. “Thank you.” She was glad somebody thought so.

Iida returned her smile and the five of them stayed for a couple more minutes before departing. Uraraka took to spending more time with Kazumi for the rest of the night and put her down after they all ate dinner. She pumped some more breast milk (that was uncomfortable) and made up three bottles before she finally confronted Bakugou in his room.

“I’m sorry about earlier.” She said, standing in the doorway.

Bakugou looked up from his phone and nodded. “You better be.”

“Don’t be like that.” Uraraka’s shoulders slumped.

Bakugou stood and walked to her slowly. Uraraka knew better than to back away; she had nothing to be afraid of. His warm, blistered palms came up to cup her face gently, red eyes meeting hers like they had hours before. “Deku makes me so fucking mad.”

“Why?” Uraraka whispered. “Why couldn’t you just put aside your differences? Don’t you want me to be happy? Iida does. They all do. You constantly go out of your way to provoke me or somebody else. Or get a reaction out of us.”

“I know.” Bakugou spoke through clenched teeth. “God I fucking know it. I just… I can’t… Fuck.” He always had a hard time putting his thoughts into words. Uraraka was patient, she always was.

“I don’t want Kazumi growing up without you. I don’t want her to grow up with her father being angry all the time and yelling at me and us arguing. I want this to work. But you have to work on yourself first.” Uraraka explained.

Bakugou’s brows creased. “Are you dumping me?”

“No!” Uraraka shook her head quickly. “I want to help you. For us. For Kazumi. Let go of that anger. Tell me about your worries. I was the only one talking in the beginning, I think you owe me the same.”

Bakugou released a trembling breath. “Fine.”

They moved to Uraraka’s room where Kazumi was sleeping just in case she woke up and needed them. They leaned against the pillows facing each other, Bakugou taking her fingers in his hand, pressing on fingernails and the pads of her fingers. The whole time he spoke quietly of his nightmares and his PTSD to every single shitty thing that happened in their first year of UA that were still affecting him.

It was the closest they had been in a while. Uraraka felt like she learned more about Bakugou in those couple of hours than she had in their entire relationship. And it was wonderful . This was what Uraraka wanted, to feel closer to him, to feel like they were an actual couple.

Falling asleep with their fingers twined together, their sleeping baby girl in her bassinet beside them, things were definitely starting to piece together quickly. All the puzzle pieces surrounding theirs were coming together, beginning to finish the picture.

[chillihansol]

barista!jeonghan (click for HD)

yoon jeonghan is part of the city barista squad

and the laziest one

he requested to work on making the coffees and less interacting to customers

bc he does not have enough energy to ask the same thing over and over lol

it’s fine with their manager bc his co-worker is luckily hoshi

so hoshi does the talking while jeonghan does the drinks

their shifts start right after seungkwan’s and seungcheol’s

jeonghan makes the best coffee out of the four workers in the city

seungcheol is the worst

and people love his coffee so they often ask if jeonghan is around

he often takes nap on the storage room when there are no customers 

which is also the reason why he smells like coffee all the freaking time

besides the fact he makes them, he also sleeps with the packages of coffee beans hahaha

since jeonghan is a multi-talented barista, his latte arts are very known in the city

people would tag him on social media for making such a beautiful latte art

seungcheol is so envious of him 

ofc, his rosette latte art is the best and the most wanted design

sometimes. he’d try to make cute animals

or a trail of mini hearts

jeonghan is pretty famous too

like junhui

one time, he encountered the same situation when the girls didnt know what to order bc they dont drink coffee 

anyways,, jeonghan loves his job

but he also loves it when his shift ends bc he goes straight to the nearest park

he will have a cup of creamy coffee in his hands while he sits on the bench and inhales some natural breeze

this is his routine

going back to the shop, jeonghan is pretty close to some customers too

tho not as much as soonyoung does

but he’s close to a few,,

and this few includes you

in fact, you are the closest to jeonghan

jeonghan enjoys your company all the time

he’d even forget about his nap hours for you :’’)

you met jeonghan through dk

bc you’re into latte arts, dk recommended jeonghan’s coffee place bc the campus cafe does not necessarily make such thing

so you met jeonghan four months ago

and tbh

you hesitated if he is the jeonghan bc damn, he’s a t t r a c t i v e

the first time you met him, the shop was really packed with ppl, and the baristas where working really fast behind the counter

you somehow stopped yourself from ordering a latte art bc they seemed really busy that time

but you stayed there for a while, waiting for the customers to lessen in a bit, until there were only a few of them when you made your way to the counter and a cute guy with small eyes smiled at you widely

you looked at his named tag, and it said ‘soonyoung’

then you looked at the other barista whose back was facing you

and you couldnt help but stare at his broad shoulders

and his lean torso

and his silky light brown hair

until ‘soonyoung’ cleared his throat and you snapped back to reality

“hyung, i think she’s one of your fans”

slafksa your eyes widen and shook your head too immediately, and you were like nononononono 

ofc, jeonghan turned around to look who this person soonyoung was pertaining about and he found you, and saw your flustered face

it was so embarrassing

and that time, you wanted to punch this soonyoung in the face for jumping to conclusions easily

luckily, jeonghan didnt ride soonyoung’s trip

“no, i think she’s dokyeom’s friend”

and you were nodding your head too quickly for agreeing on him

the sight looked so cute in jeonghan’s eyes so this brought a huge smile on his face

poor soonyoung who was so clueless

“dk told me you were coming today, i was just doing a latte for you” he said, walking closer to the counter 

as he stopped by it, he leaned down to match your height and rested both of forearm on top

who is this handsome guy and why does he smell like coffee

your head jerked away from the closeness of his figure to you,,,,,and it was so awkward so you put out a hand and introduced yourself

“im y/n”

“i know. im jeonghan”

“i know”

so jeonghan’s first latte art for you was the usual rosette 

tho it was the most common design, you still thought how talented jeonghan is

and how thoughtful he was for doing your coffee in advance

thanks to dk

the first time you met him, he actually sat in front of you as you took one of the tables,,,,basically, jeonghan ditched his job just to have your company, and his shift was ending anyways

so you continue to meet jeonghan in the next months, but not daily, since you often get your regular coffee from the campus cafe

you visit him twice or thrice a week and he’d give you a pre-made latte art :’)

how sweet

as you continue to know more about jeonghan,, one day, you found him sitting on a bench at the university park

his eyes were closed and his arms were crossed on his chest, a cup of coffee was resting beside him,, and he was also wearing a white button down shirt with the sleeves rolled up which looked so attractive on him skhfasljs

you thought that he wouldnt mind your company so you quietly sat beside him, and jeonghan wasnt bothered at all

“hi y/n”

this made you jump from your seat bc,, did he see you?? with his closed eyes??

but you tried to play it cool, “how did you know it was me?”

“no one really approaches me except for you” he chuckled, and finally opened his eyes to look straightly at you

and you swore, a bucket of butterflies was poured in your stomach

knowing jeonghan, his shift in the coffee shop was done at that time,,,but that was the only time you found out that he likes chilling on the park

and you were taken a back bc,, you never saw him there, considering that you are always at the park too

this brought the two of you to another stage of friendship,,,when you visit jeonghan, you’d wait for his shift to finish so both of you could chill on the park and talk about stuff

if the weather’s not good, he wouldnt ask for you to stay in the cafe but you’d end up still staying bc you enjoy his presence too much

there are times when jeonghan has to work overtime,

and if there are no customers, he’d bring you to the storage room and continue to hang out with you

soonyoung gets very suspicious,,, bc he thinks you and jeonghan do something pg there

but truthfully, you were just lazily talking together

the others found out about your relationship friendship with jeonghan

and seungcheol was so sure the boy is in love with you bc he forgets his nap hours just to hang out

and he thought you are going to be jeonghan’s distraction and jeonghan would not be able to make good coffees anymore

there was a moment when you somehow realized that you already have feelings for him too,,,and you were kind of scared bc your friendship with him has grown so much and you didnt want to ruin it bc of your feelings

let’s not forget about jeonghan’s fans, right???

so one day, you were chilling with him again, when a group of girls came inside the shop

with soonyoung greeting them enthusiastically, they saw you and jeonghan being all giddy and happy while talking to each other

you were not sure if jeonghan saw it but you caught this girl giving you a glare

and she whispered smth to her friends and they gave you a glare too

fite me

tbh, you didnt like ppl giving you that kind of treatment, and jeonghan seemed to notice that you became quite uncomfortable, asking if you were okay

when soonyoung finally took their order, jeonghan excused himself to make the drinks

you might or might not had been watching his figure as he make the coffees

when he came back to hand the drinks to the girls, one of them had the aUDACITY TO WALK ON YOUR DIRECTION AND ‘ACCIDENTALLY’ SPILL THE VERY HOT DRINK ON YOU

SNDJSNLKS IT WAS SO HOT

you yelped in pain, jeonghan was shocked and panicked, the girl pretended that she was sorry, and her friends were quietly enjoying the scene

jeonghan ran from behind the counter to go to you

“can you be more careful next time?” you asked bitterly

and boy oh boy, the girl was like “maybe if you weren’t blocking the way and flirting with him then this wouldnt happen to you”

jeonghan for sure was so mad from what she said,, and you were not having it

“maybe if you were actually really nice then jeonghan would have flirted with you, but you’re not.”

YOU GO GURL

jeonghan bit his proud smile from what you said, but he was still kind of mad from what the girl did to you

“pls be careful next time and try not to hurt any customer” he said, a hint of annoyance was evident in his voice

then he turned to you and whispered “come with me”

you followed him to the storage room, and the girls were left in surprise,, while soonyoung cleaned their mess

as you entered the room, you plopped down on the small seat and a pout came on your lips “they ruined my shirt” you muttered

he was getting something from his bag, then he handed you a hoodie, “change your shirt with this, i’ll be back”

then he was out of the room,,

when you replaced your ruined shirt with his hoodie, an unfamiliar manly scent lingered in your nostrils

it was jeonghan’s real scent

not the coffee scent

but his real scent that smelt so manly

when he came back, he had a cold compress on his hand, and squeezed himself beside you

the drink was spilled on your side and near your chest, so jeonghan hesitated for a second before pressing the compress

“do you want me to do it or you can do it by yourself”

you chuckled at how flustered he was, ofc, you got the compress from his hand and put it inside the hoodie

while you did that, he snaked an arm around your shoulder and pulled you closer to him

then pressed his cheek on your forehead

djaslkdjsalkdj

“i need to ask my manager to ban ppl from going here if they’re going to cause any trouble”

and as he said that lowly, you wanted to melt in his arms bc he’s so sweet and concerned to you :’(

“you don’t really have to do that, you’ll lose bunch of customers. i guess, i’ll be the one to adjust” you mumbled

“no, i want you here. if you stopped coming, i’ll resign and apply to the campus cafe then”

that time, you were so sure that the feelings are mutual

so,,,,you pulled a way to have a better view of his face, then pressed your warm lips on his cheek

“spill. are you in love with me???”

“and what if i am?”

“i dont believe you”

then in a second, his lips connected with yours,,and he didnt pull away until you kissed him back

when the two of you separated, he muttered under his breath “you taste like coffee” and earned a subtle smack on his chest from you

and you started dating on that day thanks to the girl who spilled coffee on you : )

jeonghan didnt resign on his job,, but the girls just stopped showing up in the shop and he is more than glad

you’d still visit him, and he’d still give you a latte art

esp when you’re not feeling very well, he’d make a heart design for you

jeonghan just loves you so much

when you couldnt visit him, the two of you would just meet by the nearest park and you’d have your time together there

when he’s not working, you’d go into park adventures with ofc, a cup of coffee

bc jeonghan, parks, and a cup of coffee are your love :’)

maybe you love jeonghan a lil more hehe

and he does the same to you 

☕ more barista!au : s.coups  |  jeonghan  |  joshua  |  junhui  |  hoshi  | wonwoo  |  woozi  |  dokyeom  |  mingyu  |  the8  |  seungkwan  |  vernon  |  dino

layout credit; by pdmapatil © to the owner of the photos. I do not own any of the photos used. 

[sharkytrash7]

My last say. Hopefully not my final essay.

So I've been watching YouTube videos of how to get over ex's and how to deal with break ups. In my heart, I know we belong together. I know the fact that I'm not Christian is a problem. My arguement is that you never fell in love with an atheist. You fell in love with me. Its tough when you refer to me as atheist because I'm so much more then that. You of all people know that. I love you with all my heart. I want to marry you still. I'm not of being alone or being without you. I'm scared of what I am without you. To be honest you were and still are my guardian angel in my eyes. You've changed my life and I hate to see you leave. You keep emphasizing that we might not be together but I still have hope we'll be together. After all, you have my rib. I know things are hard for you at the moment with God. Its tough for me 2. I go to afda and put on a smile pretending I'm fine. You want to be with a Christian. I get that. But no Christian will be as good as I am to you. Even tough I'm not a Christian, I can try to be the best person in the world for you. I dont love for your looks or your voice or cause you give me affection or cause you buy me stuff or cause you did things to me. Its all those things and more. I love you cause youre you. I would never change anything about you. Even your cute toes. Once upon a time I promised you I'd convert for you. I want to make this clear ! I am not trying to manipulate you in any way shape or or form ! Im just venting to tumblr. I'd keep my promise. It wouldnt be for you or for me but for us. Cause your right woman ! Its just better if we're both Christian. I know your gonna be thinking, "hmmmm, hes probably just saying this so I get back with him. He just wants me back. What an ass" and it does look like that. Thats why. Huh. Idk actually. I guess it is kinda fucked up to say this. Kinda shity cause then it would make your life 10 times harder. Okay so ignore that bit. Im not deleting it because effort AND because I said it / typed it with meaning and for a reason.

I get why we dont talk because if your parents find out they'll lose their minds and also because I'm pulling you away from your God things. But like when will I be able to date you. Ya know. Like even if I was Christian, your parents would still hate me. And if your parents forgave me. I wouldnt be Christian. So i get your side of life. Cause thats tough cookie. I wish our love could be enough because it is lowkey for us. Its a rough one. I wanna tell you so many things but i dont wanna jinx your future. I just find it crazy that you think your going to marry someone else. People have been saying its just because your my first girlfriend but I dont believe em. I felt a connection with you. Something I dont see happening with anyone else. You keep telling not to wait for you but its what I feel is right. Just like how you said it feels right to break up. I dont think this will last forever. We'll I wont be able to last much longer but. I feel like we've got this. We've been through a lot together and I'm positive about us. When I said us not being together would be a watse I didnt mean a waste of time or money or anything. I just meant it would be crazy for us to go through everything we did just to let (a big deal) get in the way. I love you. I love you. I LOVE YOU MY BOO !

Lowkey in the back of my head thinking this

I know I said these things but I cant hold you to anything. You could be over me and my shit and want another relationship. I have to deal with that. If you want some buff white english indie guy to come love you then that the way it'll be.

Deep down I want it to be though. Like I want to be your knight. Your dark knight _wink wink_. I know eternal life is a big thing for you and I'd like to be there with you to. I dont really know if I'll be accepted up in heaven. Even if i am a Christian. Im hard on myself like that. Id rather let more deserving people go to heaven. Idk why I put myself. Its just me. I just see potential in others. More so than in myself. I see my purpose on earth as a chance to help others. You know. Plus im sure when (i cant remember the name of it) the blue lights come down and take people to heaven. Im sure I'll meet you up there. Your just so scared of messing up like one thing and I get it I was like that 2. Id make sure everything was planned out. Truth is. I hd to stop being scared in order to move forward. Like after my car accident. I was terrified to drive again. I couldnt deal with driving. But i had to get over it. And I know you blame yourself and God for what happened. Please dont. Everything happens for a reason. I feel like that stuff taught me a lesson about being calm and calming myself down. It definitely wasnt God punishing you for being with me. Again not trying manipulate you or preach to you or try to change your thoughts. Its just my opinion. All I'm hoping you do is consider what I'm saying. I really truley am sorry about everything but at the same time. Everything that happened has happened and its made us who we are. If given the chance I'd do it again.

Also lowkey I'd love to celebrate 2 years with you. #nopressure. Like seriously I'm being serious but at the same time dont stress you cute little head about it. If it doesnt happen it doesnt happen.

My eating habits have gotten worse. Idk. Im lowkey scared im dying. I want to go to the doctor but its expensive and I've been such a burden on my parents. I'm pretty sure I can wait a couple years before getting it checked up.

My new glasses are cool. You have to see yhem in person. That another thing. I thought i wouldve seen you by now just driving or something. But i guess you only really drive to church and home. Or to someones house or like a party thing.

Happy 21st birthday baby. Wow. Your getting like so old. I still remember falling in love with the 19 year old you. Look how far we came. A whole 2 years. Youve grown so much since then. Firstly you don't bump into cars xD. Jk. You really have become such a grown up and I've been blessed being there with you. You became independent and youve become yourself. Its was a wild trip but to see you come out on top has been worth it. You deserve the world. And if anyone tries to hurt you / stop you, send em my way. Youre one of the most beautiful intelligent cutest amazingest bestest person in the whole world. Happy Birthday Boo.

The boo tattoo. We getting em together ? Also all your stuff is still here so if you do move out invite me over sometime so i can drop off these things. Lowkey your life is amazing and spontaneous and I have huge FOMO (fear of missing out). You don't to worry about me tho. I've been waiting to do things with you.

Moving out. Yeah. Its a big possibility next for me. I remember you originally said we can't live together which sucked but made sense. So. If you ever need a place to stay. Call me. I'll set up a guest bedroom for you.

I wasnt going to with your dad a happy birthday because you never with mine I dont think. But im not a monster like you. Jk lol. You probs just forgot.

Also it really sucks you cant speak 2 me. Your not an asshole. I just wish you could've helped me calm down.

Im sorry this was so long. I'm sure Ive forgotten things and said things I shouldnt have but tbh its been kinda theraputic for me. Like I feel a lot better having got thise things off my chest. You dont have to reply to anything yet. Cause I know your brains busy atm. If you can acknowledge that you seen it that would be nice. But ja. Please dont take anything Ive said personally or strongly. I just blurped things out and yes things do have meaning. But it takes two to tango. I desperately want to tango with you though.

Ps I love you

Pps Im sorry

Ppps take me back

Pppps jk. not jk

Yours truly

Triston Kyle Pillay (Penguin)

3:36 Vala is today. Shhhh

[franeridart]

I just found your profile and I love your style so much!

AHHHHHH THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!!!!

Anon said:From kami's-hair-is-hard-to-doodle anon from a while back: I finally got it! Thank you so much for your advice - reading and rereading your tips kept me practicing! I'd also like to thank the Academy /orz

I’m glad it could help you at all!!!! :O Kami keeps on being a mystery to me (and Horikoshi himself ???) too so don’t get too down on yourself for it taking time haha

Anon said:Ive sent you a couple of asks before but Im just so in love with the content you produce. Like not only is your art style so cute and stuff, but the plot/story (Idk) of each post is just so original and adorable. Im just so blown away by everything you post. Thank you for sharing your art!!!! Have a good week!!

Anon said:Hi! I’m new to your blog but love your art, I think your very talented which is why I’d like to ask a question. Do you have any advice for posing? I noticed your very good at it and wondered if you have any tips. If you do answer this, Thank you!!

Firstly, thank you so much for the compliments!!! I don’t know how useful exactly any advice I could give you will be, since most of it comes from drawing a lot and watching drawings even more, but in general to pick a pose usually what I do is think of the scene as if in movement? As in, what the characters are doing, and how they’d move if I were looking at them while doing it - keeping in mind the characters personalities helps me with this a lot too. 

Take for example the confessions drawings I’ve posted a couple of days ago: it’s true that there’s no words nor movement anywhere in them, but as I drew them I had a pretty clear idea of what they were saying and how the characters would react in those situations - Jirou’s shy and easily flustered, so she’s averting her eyes, unable to keep eye contact, and closing in on herself a bit, hiding her face and so on; in the concept, Kaminari was the one who confessed, so he’s holding her hand, tentative, because he’s unsure about how she’s gonna answer (it’s all stuff that didn’t actually make it in the drawing, how he reached for her hand, how he’s gonna close his other hand around her knuckles, but in my head it was a complete scene and I just picked one frame of it all to draw). The same goes for Bakugou and Kirishima - they’re rowdier, louder, more assertive and inclined to take everything as a fight, so this time around I went for a scene in which Bakugou straight out yells his feelings at Kirishima and Kirishima answers me too (again, I had the before and after in my head too, I just picked the frame that best coveyed what I was trying to do)

As I said I’m usure about how much this might help you orz it’s just my way of doing things, and it mostly comes from the fact that I was originally a writer honestly, so thinking of a whole scene makes things easier for me #rip

Anon said:Can I say, I really like the colors for your confession pictures! :>

THANK YOU??????? H E C K ;O; 

Anon said:hi~ i just went through literally everything in your sketches tag and i just wanna say i love your art and your comics and stuff. also because i went through everything, i want to bring attention to how cool it is to see how much your style has changed! your lines seem more confident and your characters more dynamic in the last few years :D

HECK THANK YOU SO MUCH it’s always so damn nice to know people can see my stuff getting even just slightly better oh mannnnnnnnnnnnnn *sob*

Anon said:can we repost your art if we give like 100% credit

Nope, sorry, I’d prefer it if you didn’t do that

Anon said:those "confessions" must be the lewdest thing I've ever seen

why would you use that word tho

Anon said:I just wanted to tell you that I love your art and it always makes me a little happier when you post something! No matter if it's your comics or colored pics or "simple" doodles, I love all of them! (Though soft stuff is the best, hehe) I just hope you know that you're very appreciated, and I hope you only have wonderful days!

GODS THANK YOU SO MUCH I’m so so so happy I can make you a lil happier ;0; I hope you’ll have every possible wonderful day too, anon!!

Anon said:I just spent the last few hours of my Sunday going though your entire blog. It’s beautiful and I hope you know that you have ruined my life because of that beauty. God damn it.

That wasn’t the intention but I’m!!!!!!!!! glad you think so???????? sob oh my g od you all are too nice to me ;^;

Anon said:Tododeku?

It sure is a ship, isn’t it - I’ve drawn for it in the past, I most probably will again in the future! :D

Anon said:you're honestly one of my fav artists on here! i love your style it feels so unique and is so pleasing to look at (((:

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I’M CRYING THANK YOU

Anon said:Your art has this unique quality about it... its really hard to describe but there’s something so dynamic and god damn pretty about your work. It’s fantastic and you inspire me to keep on creating! I hope your day is absolutely wonderful and thank you for blessing us with your art!

I’m!!!!!!!!!!!!!! so glad I can make you want to create stuff, anon!!!!!! that’s the best thing anyone can ever tell me, oh my god ;^; thank you so much !!!

Anon said:I love it when you draw cuddly bakugou!! Its wonderful!!

THAT’S!!!! super great to hear cause I could probably draw only that for the foreseeable future and not mind it one bit holy smoke

Anon said:THE HUG COMICS ARE THE BEST COMICS, I LOVE HUGS AND BAKUGOU BEING PHYSICALLY AFFECTIONATE IS SOMETHING I LOVE, A++++, WOULD RECOMMEND.

HONESTLY BAKUGOU NEEDS ALL THE HUGS AND IF I MUST BE THE ONE TO GIVE THEM ALL TO HIM THEN SO BE IT

Anon said:all ur comics are fucking delightful and make my day everytime. i ve read them all like too many times? i read each multiple times in a row and im still giddy? i love them i love u

I!!!!!!! LOVE YOU TOO???? HOLY SHIT THANK YOU

Anon said:*sigh* soft-phisical contact lover bakugou save my week. And kiri is the most wonderfull sunshine and no one cant discuss that *sit down in the floor and manly crying*

Kiri is the brightest sunshine isn’t he ;^; the sun to Bakugou’s moon, it makes me weak and I cry a lot

Anon said:I never knew I could be so weak for kiribaku omg fran what have you done to me, on that note what little things do you think theyd do to take care of each other? Like kinda lowkey stuff theyd quietly do? Ahh anyway thank you so much for all the wonderful drawings, hope everything is going well for you :)

Well, this is just the feeling I got, but I’d say they do plenty for each other quietly and softly in canon too, don’t they? Bakugou especially, pointing out to Kirishima his strength when he can’t see it for himself and always trying to find a way to cheer him up when he’s down and giving him space when he needs it, training together, studying together, worrying over one another, Kiri making sure to always know what’s up with Bakugou and following him to help him, just generally being there for each other so that if and when they need they’ll know they’ll have someone they can lean on - their relationship is really mutually supportive, isn’t it? I cry so much they make me so happy ;^; *sob*

Anon said:When season 3 comes out wouldnt it be fun if krbk fans filmed their ch.90 being animated reactions?? I think it'd be so cool/cute to see all the emotions! What do you think?

You know, I’m pretty sure that IS gonna happen? People make reaction videos for so many things! It’s nice and fun, honestly, I love it~

Anon said:I really love the way you draw spiky hair! It looks so floofy and soft.

Boi thank you!!!! Spikes are super nice to draw, though admittedly I make them less spiky then they’re probably supposed to be haha

Anon said:As someone who adores Sero Hanta And is a die hard krbk fan can I just say how much I love you? Like I was having a rough-ish day and I can’t stop smiling now because of your latest comic. Seriously, I love you and your art is everything.

I’M SO GLAD YOU LIKED THAT ONE!!!!!!!! I adore Sero if I had any better clue how to draw him I’d draw him all the time always, true story, he’s such a fave ;^;

Anon said:OMG Fran!!! I want Bakugou's name tattooed on all their faces now!! Hahahaha!

You know, one of my first krbk fanarts was Bakugou writing his name on Kirishima’s forehead, actually....................

[unproduciblesmackdown]

yeah for real when you’ve got a Scene in your head that would make more sense as a comic, you do get the whole advantages of using that format....like the dialogue of course & being able to show the changes between one panel & another to show movement & actions & things & time passage in general. and getting creative w panels is another tool you have to affect pacing and even tone, & unlike stuff like tv/movies, you get to change the shape & size of panels, which is useful imo for not only mood/pacing but also u can zoom in on exactly what u want viewers to look at. like having a lil panel just of some Detail like a hand or piece of paper or whatever. comix can jump around different shots without adding tension the way it might w film...idk i personally find it pretty fun to work with & it comes somewhat naturally to me to picture something as a comic in my head, though i’ll picture things like A Film just as much lol umm anyways yeah i think its great just to mess around w ideas in comic format & it can be rly good for making a scene with feeling, even in a short one... and i like to show emotion in movement and expressions and all, so that works out. like you can show a bunch of different facial expressions & show the slight changes & all....& show how ppl react to someone else in the space & move around each other.....its neat b/c imo emoting is generally a lot more in the subtleties of things. like you could show someone’s feelings exclusively through direct shots of their face but, realistically, ppls feelings are in things beyond their expression at any one point in time—its like, if the expression is subdued or exaggerated vs the essential content of the expression alone, their posture and how they move, what they look at, what they say, subtle shifts in their face or body as they react to something new—all these little sorts of behaviors ykno? not to downplay facial expression coz thats p much always key, and like i said its my fave...but when it comes to trying to portray stuff w emotional impact, i like to think of a lot of other details that imo can lend a lot of visual and emotional information alike....plus just the more stuff you’re drawing the more you’re giving a scene to work with... bgs and everything can set the mood & also just give context to a scene & even i’m getting better about like, making even simple bgs sometimes. anyways not like im an expert in anything at all related to anything but i have been Drawing W Feelings In Mind for a while i guess lol and yeah about characters who are usually carrying some form of tension (symbolic like displayed persona vs their actual internal, &/or more actually feeling tense like irritable and all lol) still having tension be relatable even when they’re happier or more relaxed, & thinking about that in a drawing—for me anyways i just think of that as part of trying to show their personality in every drawing. like i was saying w the example of when i nobly set out to give ppl another pic of kip fucking, even if he’s totally chill w the situation, it’s relevant to me when drawing it to think of the fact that he’s usually Not getting to be chill with Any situation, and have that affect how i portray the state of finally getting to purely enjoy himself in a major way. like i suppose thinking abt this just now, i always make a point of drawing him actually physically tensed in at least some small way, i think as part of imagining how the like usual constant presence of internal conflict plays into the reaction to its absence. like how it’s not an on/off switch where a person who has to live w that all the time has some version of themself that gets to Be Normal and suddenly not have to think abt how that feels. like even tho he’s presumably getting a break & a good distraction from that stuff, i think of how he wouldn’t suddenly have a new set of behaviors to access & isnt like, suddenly a completely different person, & how there could actually be a pressure in enjoying urself b/c of the knowledge of just how special that is & how much u should savor the moment. like, even in relief there’s a tension. sidenote especially if you think you might not get such a great experience again—feeling fantastic can have a painful edge in that case & can even be really heartbreaking if you don’t know when you’ll next get to feel that way again. anyways Back To Fucking lol like i said i think in that relief i’m drawing in a little bit of desperation in the knowledge that his moments of relief from feeling all hyperaware and self conscious and conflicted and what have you etc are rare, that i show by giving him a little edge of intensity in some way or another. me drawing kip as sexually desperate lmao owned... but truly that’s just a little piece of always trying to show a chars personality no matter the emotion or action or situation or whatever!! like back in the day i said something about how two people will show the same emotion differently in their facial expressions even if most ppl have the same “basic format” to it...the difference in how ppl emote & react to things shows their personality (so does other stuff obv but relevant to emotion specifically...) & so say if i draw the same expression for one character as i did another at one point, it would have a different meaning for each of them in the context of their differences in personality...one person’s smile has a different meaning from another person smiling the same way, and all. obv thats most relevant in characters who r dramatically contrasted in their outward behavior. like i talk about all this like its a science or i plot a whole chart before ever making a drawing but mostly i come up w some image or scene in my head that seems good to me & then sometimes barely even plan how to put it down. or other times i do think abt it a lot, but even then i’ll usually do last minute tweaks. it’s really mostly instinct imo, i don’t know if it’s true that i’m a bit overly tuned in to other ppls emotions & good at reading even really subtle shifts, that might be part of it, but even if it wasnt true, emotions are usually a p instinctive thing. but ppl can communicate the same feeling in totally different ways, including ways that AREN’T instinctive to you, so imo its also good to like, also treat it like something to consciously think about. and like also just yeah in media you already like that already seems emotionally impactful, its cool to pay attention to that & keep it in mind & try to imitate & stuff. and like i said about it not being a science, i talk abt putting emotion & a characters personality into everything, but its not like i think of anything i do as being overly complex & i expect anyone to look at any random drawing of mine & be able to fully reverse-engineer a characters entire personality from one pic lmao....i don’t pretend anything i make is some work of genius that contains Everything. but it at least contains something. & maybe if u had a few pix to compare, it wouldnt be hard to deduce personality from it. like, even when someone’s acting different from their usual personality, it’s still the same person, & how they usually are changes how their behavior reads. like for lars to be relaxed and casual around other ppl suggests a higher level of comfort & trust than average, specifically because of the fact that u know his usual behavior is to be more stressed & in one way or another defensive around others. also i like to try to draw personality in e v e r y t h i n g b/c all of this is propaganda of “my fave & if you don’t like it get out” lol......like each pic is its own lil love letter what with how if i didnt have a certain level of fondness for a character, then i couldnt be effed to draw them in the first place. so i want to be like, look at the way this character is, which is why i love & cherish them.....and like you said, with a basic ability to draw a recognizable form & an interest in making fanart with that ability, you’ve got everything you need to make the content you wish somebody else had already made for you to look at. and with choosing a lot of suffering characters to be fond of you have plenty of motivation to want to draw them having a nice time. or at least feel loved and appreciated or something. all that stuff hmm i can’t remember if i had anything else i meant to get at but yeah lol....Feelings

[lemon-sugarcoats-nothing]

The following is part of a post i made on DA shortly before my bday- Thought i should put it here for- my friends who arent on DA, but are on here- so.. yeah- full version of this is on my 16th birthday acknowledgement deviation post description- Along with theee rest of my life before now

TW; Im- talking about my experience of suicidal thoughts, ideation and- planning. What lead up to it, and the results. What helped me out of it, and where i am now- Im okay for the time being, i dont have any plans to kill myself anymore- soo... yeah- 

This year has been better than last with events, but hasnt been mental health-wise. Life somewhat teased a repeat of my last year, many- many times- but didnt. Yet. Dear god i hope it doesnt repeat- But the fear of a repeat has left me distracted from school. The first quarter went well, but the second went to shit almost immediately. i fell behind on school...really badly. I was still doing some homework, but couldnt focus on it very long. I was going through my days without really living them; going to classes, only to not pay attention, and to watch youtube all the way until bed. Maybe i'd draw some too. When december rolled around i decided i was going to get back on track during winter break. I had about...17 overdue at the time, so this wasnt an unreasonable goal. "Im going to do a few assignments a day. I have more than a week to do this, so i'll still have plenty of free time"...and then every single one of my classes assigned essays the week before winter break. Something about me is that.. i cant focus in reading something im not 1. reading for myself and 2. have no interest in. I just cant. I have to listen to it being read, or i have to find SOMETHING to motivate me. And all of these essays had a reading passage to go with them...and i- broke... The class sessions i was supposed to be working on the essays, i was having panic attacks and breakdowns instead. On top of this, i was being hit with memories of my childhood my brain had shut away- and i was having another gender identity crisis- And eventually this...lead to the suicidal thoughts. At some point they got so loud that i couldnt focus on anything else, but the thoughts- and these thoughts persisted for days until i started- thinking of a plan... at first it was just- thinking of how i would do it- just to get the thought to quiet down a little so i could finally distract myself- but distracting only goes so far... First i was only going to live out until christmas, but then i thought it'd be a waste to not live out christmas break- and i hadnt written anything to say goodbye, so i pushed the date until January 4th, so i could live the last week of my life in peace, and then die. For once in my life my procrastination actually benefited me, because when that date came, i realized i hadnt remembered to think of how to do the act, and also hadnt written anything. So... i pushed the date to the end of the semester...January 25th. I started writing to all my friends, because i couldnt think of just one letter for all of them.. i had something different to say to everyone- Then i lost the energy to write, and planned on recording an audio clip for each person, which would also save them the effort of reading- I has also written out an apology to my friend's parents, covering all my bases, and planned on recording audio for that too, so my tone couldn't be misinterpreted... It was around this point that i joined a few discord servers to help keep myself occupied, while completely neglecting my homework, and- this becomes important in a sec... The last step of planning for me was to figure out the best way to...die- I decided that- slitting my wrist- would be easiest, and would allow greater chance at survival if i changed my mind last minute, than the other options i was considering... One night, i couldnt sleep so i figured it wouldnt hurt to figure out how much pressure i'd need to apply to- do what's needed- but i didnt get very far and realized that this method wouldnt work and had to rework my plan. This was just a few nights before i met my new friends in one of the discord servers- When talking to these people, i was able to relax and- be at peace for once. And i started to feel my need to die...fading- it was still there, because i was scared of the consequences of not doing my schoolwork for so long- One of these nights, i ended up slipping off a clue to one of them that something is wrong when we were the only ones on vc- which worried him- and i cracked, and told him what's going on, lying a bit so he wouldnt worry. A few days later, my mom found out about my 27+ overdue assignments, and her reaction was WAAYYYYY more mild than i thought it'd be- which- gave me no more reason to die so the plans went to the dumpster, less than a week before they were to be carried out- She didnt make me do the assignments, she just told me to do better this semester. As soon as January 25th came, relief swept over me and for the first time in an entire month, i could fully relax... i wanted to cry from how much relief i was feeling lol the following week, i took to just take it easy, tho a lot of my teachers were starting to talk goals for this semester which- overwhelmed me a lot, because i was only just starting to think about what i wanted to do the next day- the week had a light homework schedule, so i didnt fall behind either, which is good! The week after that, aka last week, i was starting to build myself back up. Still wasnt attending all my classes, and wasnt paying attention in them, but did most of my homework. I have a few assignments to make up already, but thats okay, because im still trying to put myself back together, and i know i need to take it slow- This week, im still trying to get back on my feet but im starting to create goals now, and taking baby steps. Not thinking about goals for graduating yet, just about this quarter. This month even lol Im not going to worry about the assignments im missing just yet, but my goal is to make sure i get all my work in this quarter, even if its unfinished, or really really late. "Submitting something and getting points knocked is better than submitting nothing and getting a 0" is something my mom told me... and i want to make that my motto for this semester. Start everything, and submit everything, even if it isnt finished. Now, i still plan on apologizing to my friend's parents, but i need to fully move on from what happened in january first. I'll need to rewrite the script first too, because looking at it causes a feeling of dread and- upsetness?

[theday]

tagged by @ikyh and @younghyuuns ill be doing both sets !! :D thank you both for tagging me!! this got long so yall dont hav 2 read <3

ru?? rushee’s set!! me: wow ru does not sound like rushee at all ? djsjdhhjd im dumb but i realize now

i. do u believe in astrology? whats ur sign and do u line up with the features usually attributed to it?

fucc... i guess i do ;-0...... and yeah i think?????? like they say capricorns are cold bitches and funny nd im like ya thats me... but they also say we’re hard workers and im like uh.. dont know abt that karen !

ii. what’s ur favorite pair of socks?

bbbbbbb..... socks huh...... i guess my ankle ones? there are also socks that have actual designs on them and those r usually thicker.. keep my feets safe! most of them have pkmn designs bc.. yeah... love the poke mans

iii. what’s a food that reminds you of a specific moment/memory?

i could think of anythiing and get reminded of one situation if that makes sense.. but i thought of pineapple..pizza... anyway the memory isnt anythngn special its just me staring at my delicious hawaiian pizza..... at my favourite pizza place.... love that shit

iv. what’s the longest you’ve gone without sleeping?

i dont have the actual hours but the latest ive stayed up.. like willingly would be until 2am

v. how has ur taste in music changed throughout ur life?

went from 1d to 5so/s + other bands to utaite.... they cover vocaloid songs ig i never kno how2 explain what utaites r then 2 kpop.. but i still listen 2 bands + kpop and utaites.... so nothing much has changed ive just gone broader.. wider... expanded my tastes... 

vi. who’s ur fashion icon?

oh definitely kim wonpil

vii. what’s the dumbest thing you’ve ever done without realizing?

i breathe dumbass particles.. i cant think of one bc my brain probably blocked off all access to my horrifying past but ive been thinking abt how i used 2 send the boy i used 2 like 1d songs....................... 12 y/o old me rly thought. he’d listen.... 12 y/o me thought spamming him was a good idea glad ive learnt from that! 

viii. what’s something you want to brag about?

my grades but it didnt get me into psychology so nvm ! its still good though i didnt expect to get an A1 (hghest grade) for combined humanities since ive had a B my whole life without it i wouldnt be able to move on education wise lmao so thank god for that thanks cambridge thanks bell curve sunbaenim 

ix. when you imagine urself being happy in the future, where exactly are you (like the location!)?

oh definitely an apartment somewhere where its always windy and the curtains are always Moving and the sun just Shines in the room but its not that hot either its just full of warmth and yeah thats the dream maybe also walks in the park without having 2 worry abt sweating my pits out u kno! tldr anywhere but here

x. what’s something you’ve always wanted to own?

let me Think.... i dont need a lot/?? but id love hm.............. i want stability but realistically i want all the hh pcs from the code albums. 

xi. how’ve you been lately?

good good! i finished my *** fic and its. im proud of it though i know its not that good nd i can do better but its done ! and hm i could be going to see mx but asking my mum is stressing me out speaking of her she wont stop Coughing and she refuses to see the doctor ;-/ love those sleepless nights ! other than that i just want 2 get out and feel the sun ???/ wanna get out of this house yea but i need to be.. shady with my money i cant get a job because school is starting in a month and im going overseas again sometime next month so ! no ones gonna hire someone who can only work for 2 weeks at most dhzjhhs shouldve worked when i had the time dumbasses only

ok now falen

1. what’s been on your mind??

hm redacted feeling towards my mum but i cant say them bc itd be insensitive 

2. what are you looking forward to? 

mx? possibly but also finishing my enrolment papers

3. story time!: how and when did you get into day6!!!!!

fuck...... listen up LADS. 

ive told the same story like 10 times but im never gonna get tired of saying this shit bc i love miss boxy so much nd she deserves the appreciation anywy she introduced me 2 day6 after i saw this one (1) picture of brian in minion glasses and instantly i knew in that Fucking moment thatd id die for him. so i asked for the name of my murderer and was introduced to day6 whom frankly id never heard of b4 bdjhjh she sent me all their mvs and i still remember the night . i remember walking out of this japanese restaurant, twitter open, chat wiht boxy there and i was like.. interesting ill go listen when im home so i Did! and my mind was blown away bitch? i honest 2 god expected them to be a boy group,,, dancing and shit yknow? i didnt know k bands existed ! so as a previous 5/sos stan i was like wow. this??? this shit is 10/10 a fucking BANGER thats what i felt listening 2 i smile and just going :O over the fucking instruments so idk if how can i say was the last or second song but Damn. .. it made me scream thanks mister j** he rly dragged me by the collar of my shirt and threw me face first into Heaven so i watched everything i asked my friend for video recommendations and after boxy sent me a page with their face and names i was like this jae kid is 182 cm? wow gotta stan now im stupid and stupid for glasses and tall people so ! it happened bithc,, ugh i lov eday6 so much i remember binge watchng all their vlives after the july after party live (that being the first vlive i watched Ever in my entire life and i laghed so hard despite not understanding a damn thing) please id giv my heart and soul2 day6 im so happy with the way ive progressed as a myday :^( 

bonus when i first started stanning it was 26th june and shortly after i made a stan acc teasers were being dropped but i didnt kno why ppl were freaking out i remmeber seeing jae’s teaser nd going ? ok? its just a pic damn ;-/ and then eveeryone was like: dowoon! choker! me: wdhs? what

4. ????do you have any allergies????

did u think of jae and no i used to be allergic 2 dairy products but thats disappeared

5. a fond memory???

bowling with friends and im just a disaster of a friend im always so loud with them and i thank god everyday that they handle my energy ? i would cheer for them even if they got a gutter or whatever and when they got a strike id go clap like crazy i love my friends i also went i have the power of god and anime on my side before flinging the ball and theyd laugh despite not knowing what vine that was from i love my friends... psg if ur out there yall are the best x i miss hanigng out with them as a trio.. three of us :( 

6. do you paint your nails?? if so, what are your fave colors to use?? if not, why??  

thats so.. tiresome.......... dont u have 2 wait for it 2 dry and shit ? my mums always worried abt ruining the colour or some sht nd im like !!! okY!!!!!!! tldr its a pain in the ass

7. what are your favorite colors?? what are your fave colors to wear??

i like hte colour of the sky... all the colours........ yeah love that bithc and lately ive been wearing a lot of black shirts finally went out of my embarrassing colourful phase ! 

8. what languages would you like to learn?? for what reason(s)??

japanese nd korean jp because i listen to a lot of things in japanese and korean for the same reason but my priority would be jp even tho id love to communicate with my faves i just... yeah although im not exactly making an effort 2 learn bc im lazy but if i Could.... itd be those two

9. when you get stickers, do you use them or do you keep them??

DHDGFHDHDGDSJHJSJAKSSJHFHS THIS FEELS LIKE A CALL OUT???? i keep them......... 

10. are there any groups that you might get into/want to get into?

hm... well theres knk ive learnt their names and im finally able to put name 2 face so thats nice svt too if htey didnt have such large numbers... thats all for now i think?? i love evry girl group though i love gIRLS... 

11. how are you???

idk im constantly just fine?? not the im sad but im fine kind of fine im literally just neutral half the time wjhddshs wild 

both of your questions were really unique and i loved answering them thank you so much for tagging me and if youve read until the end thank you i hope you have a good day!