#i’ve rewatched challengers six time

[sceletaflores]

no lube, no protection, all night, all day, from the kitchen floor, to the toilet seat, from the dining room table, to the bedroom, from the bathroom sink, to the shower, from the front porch, to the balcony, vertically horizontally, quadratic, exponent, algorithmetic, while I gasp for air, scream and see the light, missionary, cowgirl, reverse cowgirl, doggy, backwards, forward, sideways, upside down, on the floor, in the bed, on the couch, on a chair, being carried against the wall, outside, in a train, on a plane, in a car, on a motorcycle, the bed of a truck, on a trampoline, in a bounce house, in the pool, bent over in the basement, against the window, have the most toe curling, back aching, leg shaking, dick throbbing, fist clenching, ear ringing, mouth drooling, ass clenching, nose sniffling, eye watering, eye rolling, hip thrusting, earthquaking, sheet gripping, knuckles cracking, jaw-dropping, hair pulling teeth jitterbug, mind boggling, soul snatching, over stimulating, vile, sloppy, moan-inducing, heart-wrenching, spine tingling, back breaking, atrocious, gushy, creamy, beastly, lip biting, nail biting, sweaty, feet kicking, mind blowing, body shivering, orgasmic, bone breaking, world ending, blackhole creating, universe destroying, devious, scrumptious, amazing, delightful, delectable, unbelievable, body numbing, bark-worthy, can't walk, head nodding, soul evaporating, volcanic erupting, sweat rolling, voice cracking, trembling, sheets soaked, hair drenched, flabbergasting, hip locking, skin peeling, eyelash removing, eye widening, pussy popping, nail snatching, spectacular, hair ripping, show stopping, magnificent, unique, extraordinary, splendid, phenomenal, malforming, heavenly, devil's tango. please.

[dysfunctional-doodle]

now i WOULD go rest after the whole ypi business HOWEVER. is there any way to convince you to watch it because OH MY GODDDDDDDD THIS IS MY FAVOURITE SERIES EVER!!!!!!!!!!! it’s certainly not the best written tmnt series out there (ESPECIALLY with the romance…. shudders)

HOWEVERRRRRRR there are a lot of awesome things about it i really like….. i think one thing i like the most about this iteration (besides the very obvious obsession about sunset duo) is THE VOICEACTING. in a tmnt voiceacting teirlist i would put almost every rise character in s tier and yet STILL, despite the fact i put donnie in b, 2012 IS MY FAVOURITE VOICE ACTED SERIES. the original ask includes the giant navy battleship line and. yeah. sean astin’s delivery makes it a kajillion times funnier to me. IDK MAN THERE’S SOMETHING ABOUT SPLINTER’S VOICE THAT IS SO SATISFYING TO ME. AND THE WAY SHINIGAMI LAUGHS???????????????? HRGHHHHH

also a big fan of the dynamics between the turtles…… the absolute brothers of all time. sobs (again it’s very obvious which duo is my favourite hfhdbsjbsdj)

also this might be a slightlyyyy controversial take but mikey’s adhd is written really really REALLY well in my opinion. like ok donnie said he hasn’t matured since age six and infantilisation is a big problem with neurodivergent people HOWEVER. a big part of mikey’s character is that he doesn’t like being underestimated and wants to prove he is capable but also. as a person with adhd. YEAH I TOO FEEL LIKE THE PERSON IN MY BRAIN IS A SMALL CHILD. the reason i peaked in primary school is because, back then, i was only slightly less mature than my peers. now as i’m in secondary school i realise i am like a TWO YEAR OLD compared to these people. when i was in s1 i would call myself the twelve year old toddler because that was essentially how mature i felt i was. SO THE STRUGGLE IS REAL. maybe there are times he feels slightly stereotypical but hey, everyone has their stereotype moments, right??? (as cliche as it is i feel like everyone has had a “hey, look, squirrel!” moment in their life). yeah i just relate to 2012 mikey on a spiritual level. like every time he’s on screen he does something and i think WOW. that is LITERALLY me (which is why i’m surprised that one poll i have more people think i’m like sonic than mikey?? but i’m not complaining, sonic is super cool)

the 3d animation is cool (the increase in skill is very obvious as you progress further through the series) and the fight scenes are just. MWAH. SO satisfying.

also SOME of the romance is pretty ok! raph and mona lisa are great. also arguably raph and casey (but we’re not ready for that conversation i think).

i have a full disc set of all five seasons that included a list of all the episodes and whenever i finished an episode i REALLYYYY REALLY enjoyed i would highlight the name in pink sharpie… here are all the episodes i marked :3 (i might need to rewatch some of these)

the pulveriser

cockroach terminator

parasitica

the good, the bad, and casey jones

plan 10

a foot too big (i’m actually not too sure about this one right now, might need to rewatch it)

journey to the center of mikey’s mind

revenge of the triceratons (this one is only half highlighted for some reason)

bat in the belfry

tokka vs the world

requiem (sobs. sobs so so hard.)

end times

when worlds collide: part 2 (i think this one is where the giant navy battleship line comes from)

it’s ok if you don’t want to watch it or you’re not able to watch it but if you can and you don’t end up liking it THAT’S OK I TOTALLY GET IT THERE ARE A LOT OF PARTS THAT SUCK

erm anyways that was my strange ramble. sorry for invading your ask box 👍🏼

(oh yeah, the comics are pretty cool too)

(guess who michalina’s favourite character + duo is challenge (impossible))

Ok I will say oddly enough I’ve read the comics for 2012. Weird, but I pirated found them and enjoyed reading them, they were fun.

I have watched a few episodes - I did like the speed demon episode (I love the dynamic of 2012 donnie and Casey mirroring the 90s movies even down the name insulting scene where they are going through the alphabet) and I like parasitica a lot. I have watched others like journey to centre of Mikey’s mind, Buried Secrets, and the usagi episodes, and also the final episodes of the Tales of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (? I cannot remember the name, but the one with the insect guy as the villain who’s name I can’t spell and can’t be bothered to Google lol), that one where Donnie becomes dumb, the vampire ones, but that’s it.

What puts me off is the romance and the (in my opinion) partial butchered character Donnie has due to it. He’s genuinely creepy and it makes watching it uncomfortable and wildly out of character compared to what I’m used to. I’ve never been a fan of romance, and I expect ally despise the whole “main character has a crush on someone else but is so nerdy they don’t know how to approach them” trope. The whole love triangle and the poorly written “love at first sight” which most the romances in the show are just put me off completely. I genuinely have tried other episodes but I cringe every time the Donnie/April romance happens. It’s a shame because when they let Donnie move on from April or not be simping after her I really like his slightly sarcastic, blunt yet sensitive nature.

I’ve heard they kind of throw away the romance at season 3 but it’s having to watch this until then tbh. Maybe one day I will give it a go if people really say it’s worth the suffering of my least favourite trope. You seem to like it a lot so maybe :)

[waitmyturtles]

Yesterday was an insane day, huh? I can’t wait to see what Only Friends entails -- despite my best efforts to keep cool in dis HEAT, that NeoForce snippet in the car still has me flying. Anyway, I want to pen some quick notes on Minato’s Laundromat, season 2, and note some Old GMMTV Challenge thingies, now that I’m back from this crazy summer trip!

1) I’m fully caught up on Minato’s Laundromat, season 2 -- I was three episodes behind (thanks, OGMMTVC, ha), and thanks to the eagle eyes of @emotionallychargedtowel, I am LOSING MY MIND AT THE THOUGHT OF TAKEDA KOUHEI, AKA NOZUE FROM OLD FASHION CUPCAKE, MAKING AN APPEARANCE IN ANOTHER BL, OMG OMG OMG

GASPING! GASPING!

Because Old Fashion Cupcake is my LIFE, lol. @emotionallychargedtowel and @bengiyo nail it in ECT’s post with the note on this wonderful continuation of clutch actors reappearing in Japanese BLs, like Izuka Kenta from The Novelist going to Candy Color Paradox, and Inukai Atsuhiro from Zettai BL going to Our Dining Table. I love Japan’s easter eggs in these shows. 

But also, regarding episode 5 of Minato: god, I really liked how the tables turned on Minato and Shu. It’s been interesting to have the older characters as the dominant voices of the two central relationships of this show. And of course, this second season is constructed totally around the ongoing nature of both of these relationships. So, we VERY NATURALLY see the “older voice” perspective, because it just so happens that the two older men of these couplings are the ones really setting the tone and pace of the engagements.

And the tables both begin to turn in episode 5, and I think these lines of jealousy between both Minato and Shu, for me, are frankly welcome. We can see Shin getting frustrated, Minato not having the words to respond to that frustration, and Minato just not allowing his door to open on his full feelings for Shin. The theme of this relationship being a dodgy one -- but only in the eyes of Minato! -- deserves to be challenged. And I like how this challenge is being set up in large part in the context of Shin as a student, where he would be learning how to challenge mindsets vis à vis his education anyway.

Anyway -- I utterly love this show so far. As always with the Japanese BLs that I am simping over, I wish I could give them more of my background mind time that’s being otherwise spent on Thailand, but -- soon enough!

2) Speaking of Thailand, HA -- after I published my YYY review for the Old GMMTV Challenge yesterday, I updated my list considerably. On the recommendation of @lurkingshan, @wen-kexing-apologist, and @neuroticbookworm, and because of Jojo Tichakorn’s recent tweets on the topic of what influenced Only Friends, I’ve added Gay OK Bangkok, seasons 1 and 2 to the list and started watching it last night. 

I’m already calling it — GOKB is a MUST WATCH before Only Friends. 

I can’t wait to get HUGE about this in my OGMMTVC review of this show.

Within the first five minutes, it’s already so much more open and honest about sex and queer sex than the VERY HIGH majority of BLs out there. The show is a collaboration between Jojo and Aof Noppharnach, on the lives of six gay men in Bangkok, released in 2016 and 2017 -- nicely placed between Make It Right, SOTUS, and Make It Right 2.

Obviously, I’m going backwards chronologically again, but I think GOKB will be important for understanding specifically how Asian queer male artists in this space view and portray intimacy, and language (verbal and body language) regarding sex. @lurkingshan, you were mentioning yesterday that queer male viewpoints on sex are ones that cishet women like us just may not automatically understand. INTERESTINGLY, BEFORE we talked about this -- I was actually thinking about this while I was watching the last two episodes of A Tale of Thousand Stars in my OGMMTVC rewatch. Tian and Phupha’s continued back-and-forth of frustration and miscommunication: I was thinking -- there’s GOTTA be something about the way Aof GESTATES and DISPLAYS queer male communication that I’m not getting automatically (besides, of course, the patriarchal structures that hold both Tian and Phupha back). I wonder, I think, and I feel that GOKB is going to give me hints about how Aof and Jojo just DO THIS style of communication in their subsequent shows. 

I can only hope that Only Friends will be as LOUD and OPEN and HONEST about the realities of sex and intimacy that GOKB does almost immediately in its first season. Watching GOKB feels WAY more real to life to me than a lot of the romance BLs out there. I feel like I’m talking about sex and love with my queer friends as I’m watching GOKB, and it’s just hewing to real life in an UTTERLY wonderful way. What a fucking show already, and I’m only three episodes in!

3) Finally, also on the topic of the OGMMTVC, I’ve added at least one movie, and am considering a second movie. I’m adding, per the recommendation of @bengiyo, 2007′s The Love of Siam to the list, for the fact that this movie had a clear influence on many of today’s Thai BL creators. I see it has many actors that make support or guest appearances in today’s BLs, and I can’t wait to get to it as an utterly formative piece, both to Thai BLs and to Asian queer cinema.

4) As well -- inspired in part by my notes on Fluke Teerapat in yesterday’s YYY review -- I am THINKING of adding 2014′s My Bromance to the list. I’m not sure, but I’m THINKING about it, and I KNOW I will get poked for it, ha.

A couple of things here. The OGMMTVC has not deep-dived into cinema yet, besides 2019′s Dew the Movie, which aired around the same time as the groundbreaking He’s Coming To Me. 

Yet, referring back to my conversation with @bengiyo about The Love of Siam -- queer cinema CERTAINLY speaks to the creation of the BL genre. Before television BL, what Thailand had in majority by way of queer media were movies. On paper at least, My Bromance fits a couple of bills. 

First, Love Sick premieres on television in 2014 -- but well after the cinematic release of My Bromance. So that already makes 2014 an even bigger year for the development of the BL television genre.

Second, My Bromance stars two homies who have been in these BL streets for a MINUTE -- as I said before, Fluke Teerapat is one, but I did NOT have the SLIGHTEST appreciation for how long Fluke Natouch has been around (and I’m in LUV with Fluke Natouch at the moment. I’m still not over the condo scene in UWMA!). 

So, we have the two Flukes, at least one of them publicly out, and starring in a movie ROOTED in a stepbrother yaoi trope. The comments of my Dew the Movie OGMMTVC review touched upon how taboos may have begotten taboos in early BLs -- that if a piece of art crossed one boundary in being queer, then other boundaries, like stepbrothers falling in love, may have then been seen as valid or “okay” WITHIN that piece of art. I’m interested in possibly watching something so very CLEARLY rooted in yaoi from the cinematic perspective, to engage with and better understand yaoi in developing and current Thai BL, as I haven’t done a real deep dive, analytically, into yaoi and Thailand yet. (As @lurkingshan and I talked about yesterday, TharnType on the OGMMTVC list fits the yaoi stereotypes the best.) And with both Flukes starring in MB, I wonder if I can attribute any influence this piece may have had on their subsequent work (like Fluke Natouch doing blushing maiden so incredibly well in 2019′s UWMA, and of course, the references to yaoi in Fluke Teerapat’s YYY). 

I don’t think @bengiyo has seen My Bromance, but I’m wondering if a few of the other friends from around the way have any thoughts... @absolutebl, @so-much-yet-to-learn, @twig-tea, @solitaryandwandering, @nieves-de-sugui and anyone else -- would love your thoughts if you’ve seen it and think it’s worth of inclusion on the syllabus.

These additions put some air between the next OGMMTVC chronological show in Lovely Writer, but I’ve got a lot of life stuff going on at the moment -- and I do want to give Tee Bundit and Lovely Writer the time he deserves, as I’m about over my anger on Step By Step, ha. 

That’s about it -- I have to still catch up with Tokyo In April Is..., but I’ll get to that later this week!

[sillyunicorn]

Twenty Questions for Fic Writers 💫

thank you @mostlymaudlin for the tag <3 tagging @facewithoutheart @martsonmars @cutestkilla and @you-remind-me-of-the-babe

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

68! Which is…wild. Six of them are songs though.

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

126,027 - dang!

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Primarily the simon snow series and all for the game. I recently got into young royals so a few there as well, plus one each for a couple other shows I like.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Like rory my top 5 are all andreil! aftg has a large and voracious readership. Better than Sex (4k, T) / Eating Well (1k, T) / Needing/Getting (3k, T) / Friendly Neighborhood Vamp (.5k, T) / Soak up the Sun (.5k, T)

Rest under the cut!

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Usually yes! Sometimes I go through spells of not replying…but I’m grateful for every single kudos and comment, it’s amazing and wonderful <3

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

This is tough bc i love me a happy ending and i don’t really do angst anyway lmao. My joke answer is my crack andreil fic Monday, but maybe the real answer is my snowbaz fic+song Breakable bc I left off before things get fully resolved (but it is clearly hopeful imo).

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

The happiEST?? Hmmm. I think my overall Happiest fic might be like, Mon Chou? And Better than Sex. both of those are just like, gooey with happiness. And both have happy endings so I’ll say one of them. Actually from a different approach I’ll say my time loop fic has the happiest ending bc it’s probably the angstiest thing I’ve written haha so the ending is such a relief. 

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I have not!! Super grateful for everyone who leaves lovely warm positive comments on my work <3333 

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Not on my own LOL. i do have some M/E fics in my works though thanks to some collabs (see Q13 lol) <3

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

I have not! I think about it sometimes….it’s just usually hard for me to imagine a world where all my blorbos live, even though I almost only write AUs…a mystery

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not to my knowledge!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes, which is wild!!! I think several of my Vandrew fics and BtS have been translated into russian. Thank you translators, you’re incredible. 

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes!! This was one of my most fun and treasured early fandom experiences with @facewithoutheart and @martsonmars <3 published results include The Chain (i was really just losing my mind in the doc while christina wrote tbh) and The Muse’s Waking which is probably the weirdest thing I’ve ever (partially) written hahah

14. What’s your all-time favourite ship?

Making me chooooooose ugh. Idk man i reread a snowbaz fic today and almost cried and they were my first fandom love so today i’m going to say them <3 

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I recently picked up a fic i abandoned 2 years ago so now i’m like well never say never! But one that’s in my “this is in the past now” pile that i was just thinking about is my andreil Alex Rider (TV) AU. i actually had an idea for how to get around the bit i was stuck on while rewatching Alex Rider the other day sooo…. But likely still abandoned

16. What are your writing strengths?

I think, somewhat incongruously, 1) writing concisely and 2) setting a mood. I think both these things are true in say Weightless (andreil, 1k, T).

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

PLOT. plot is so hard. That’s too broad of an answer so i’ll say, keeping multiple storylines/arcs progressing at once. I don’t do it much. It’s a fun challenge though. I usually write little one-shot, single-conflict fics bc that comes easier for me. 

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

Love it. Not fluent in any other language enough to really do it justice but i’d like to.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

I think i wrote some hp and some jane austen fic before i ever got into Fandom Proper lol. First published fandom was for the Simon Snow Series <3

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

I think the one i’ve gone back to the most is Weightless. I set it in one of my favorite IRL places and it has tender blood drinking so. How could I beat that, really?

[justamegafan]

Twisted Wonderland Special

The Author Y/N

I’ve been rewatching Gravity Falls, and I want to try and make a few jokes with a Y/N as Ford Pines, but with a few differences

1. Y/N is Female (Sorry, I’m female myself and I don’t feel comfortable or that confident in writing about Male Y/N’s but I’m fine with Yuuken since I’m sorta familiar with him)

2. Y/N is sorta younger than Ford, instead of being in her 60s, Y/N is around her late 30s

3. Y/N will become a Teacher for NRC, but her classes are incredibly advanced in math, technology, science and theory (And is known at NRC as the ‘Magicless Professor’ of Ramshackle)

I’m keeping the nerdy part, that’s never gonna change or be replaced (Ford was the absolute best when he showed his nerdy/geeky side)

Y/N will earn the respect and admiration from the Housewardens, Vice Housewardens and her fellow Teachers by her tenacity, hard work, intelligence, and getting things done (Cue Azul, Idia and Rook being her biggest fans when it comes to her work)

Though at first a lot of the students won’t show any respect or listen to Y/N because they only respect those with power, until she proves them wrong by using her own strengths in science, technology, inventions and her intelligence

Rook is Y/N’s 1# Fan after having the chance to read her research in one of her Journals (Students in Y/N’s class have to earn her trust to read her Journals) and finds her brilliant mind that of a Huntress with an unquenchable thirst for knowledge, giving her the nickname ‘Madam Auteur’, ‘Madam Professeur’ and ‘Madam Anomalie’ (Y/N calls Rook a ‘Human-Sized Flamboyant Bird’, which he takes as a compliment)

Students who are in Y/N’s class must receive her permission to read her Journals, which are all tightly packed with great knowledge, secret codes, messages and her research (As Y/N has a hard time trusting others, unless they can prove to her she can trust them)

The Housewardens are all naturally skeptical of Y/N being a Teacher, until they take one of her classes, which she challenges them with some very unorthodox ways that surprisingly fit their needs and challenges them on (That and she surprises them with her encouragement to learn about their interests)

Y/N will be made fun of by some of the student body for having six fingers, as that’s something no one sees everyday

Y/N tries to not show favoritism, but really enjoys having conversations with Idia, though she’s a bit confused when he uses his slang (And absolutely geeks out visiting Ignihyde) and is fine with him not physically showing to class (She also surprises Idia with how nerdy she is, especially with her gifting him her favorite game that somehow ended up in Twisted Wonderland ‘Dungeon’s, Dungeon’s and more Dungeon’s’, and gets Azul into the game too)

Y/N will absolutely try to study the Beastmen, Fae and Non-Human Students (But with their permission of course, mainly to learn possible differences in anatomy, biology and characteristics from Humans) and loses her mind after finding out Sebek is a Human/Fae hybrid (She’ll study in non-harmful ways, blood samples, regular physical test, check-ups, X-Rays, etc)

Y/N geeks out to the Beastmen, Merfolk, Ghosts, Fae, and all Non-Human Students (Or any students with Anomaly-like traits), asking a lot of questions out of curiosity and excitement (Once again, showing just how nerdy Y/N really is)

However, Y/N is also very secretive and hesitant on trusting others, as she uses unoccupied rooms in Ramshackle for her research, experiments, storage and inventions (And doesn’t allow any visiting Students or Faculty to enter or look) however, she’ll slowly learn she can trust the Students and Staff, and is willing to reveal some of her past in the future

Y/N might also possibly get into a potential relationship with Crewel, though she does annoy Crewel and Vil for her not taking great care of herself, and loses their shit after hearing she uses fire to shave because it’s ‘faster’ (Epel called Y/N ‘tough’ for doing that)

Y/N does live with Yuuken, Yuuka, Yuu, Y/N and Grim, but respects their privacy and space (Plus, she doesn’t really know what your supposed do and not do with children, teenagers included)

Lilia, this old man, might try and show his ‘moves’ on Y/N, much to Silver’s embarrassment at his father flirting with his teacher (Y/N is also equally just as bad as flirting, which causes a phenomenon of embarrassment for anyone unfortunate enough to witness this display)

[addictedtostorytelling]

Hey there! Been enjoying your ep-by-ep reboot gifsets! Since it looks like you might be rewatching the reboot (or at least combing it for footage) I'm curious: have you noticed anything new? I know when I rewatch a movie or show that means a lot to me (even, or maybe especially, one I've seen a million times) I tend to always notice or focus on something different. Salt welcome! But the neutral/positive/miscellaneous is as well!

hi, @clintbeifong!

thank you for your kind words! i'm glad you've been enjoying the gif series.

so, uh—

confession: i have rewatched very little of the reboot even doing this latest project. 

a lot of the gifs are ones that i made previously and am now just recycling into the new sets, and even of the ones i’ve made new, entirely "from scratch" (complete with freshly clipped video from the show to work from), i've only really rewatched the individual scenes themselves and nothing much around them.

the truth is, since gsr was the only part of csi: vegas i actually enjoyed, and, even then, i was infinitely less interested in their work on the hodges case than just their interactions with each other, i haven't really been able to bring myself to revisit the reboot at large just yet.

i’m in it for the cute middle-aged marrieds™, and that’s about it.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

that so, there’s not much i can speak to in terms of new observations.

like.

i’ve noticed a few little visual parallels between the reboot and the original series here and there, but nothing especially significant or revelatory.

certainly nothing related to narrative.

of course—and here’s the salt—i suspect that even if i were to actually sit down and rewatch each episode in sequence, taking good notes, there might not be a lot there to notice, as, frankly, the story itself is underwritten/sparse. there’s just not much going on with it, either in the macro sense, with the hodges case overall, OR the micro sense, with the individual characters. everything is so superficial and one-note that there just aren’t “hidden depths” to plumb or subtexts to be read into or character developments to analyze. it’s pretty much a “what you see is what you get” kind of deal.

that said, with what very minimal, "just the gsr interactions" rewatching i actually have done, my main takeaway is just how impressed i am with the texture billy and jorja managed to give grissom and sara’s marriage—which is something i’d appreciated before, too, but which now seems even more impressive to me, the more that i think about it.

as they both talked about in their bts spots leading up to the reboot, they’d really never gotten the chance to play grissom and sara as a happy, stable, committed couple with their relationship “out in the open” before, so what they were doing for the reboot was in many ways new to them.

returning to a character after years spent away would be a hard enough challenge just by itself, but bringing something new and believable to your performance—taking something that had previously been hinted at and making it explicit in a way that feels organic and substantive—to the degree that they did is just wildly impressive.

there’s just no question that the grissom and sara we see in the reboot are “old marrieds” who’ve spent just about every waking moment of the last six years on a tiny boat together.

they feel so worn into each other, so comfortable around each other.

there’s just no hesitation between them.

and it’s not like we get that sense because we get to see a preponderance of deep, emotional moments with them, because really we don’t.

their almost total lack of personal storyline denies us anything more than just the hug in episode 01x03 “under the skin,” the ring return in episode 01x08 “pipe cleaner,” the kiss in episode 01x10 “signed, sealed, delivered,” and a few other scattered comfort moments here and there.

it all just shines through in the quiet, everyday interactions between them—the little affirming glances, the subtle nonverbal communication, the way they play off of each other, how they anticipate each other’s moves.

it has almost nothing to do with what’s in the script (which is again, next to nothing); it’s all in the portrayal that billy and jorja bring and what they imply, which is just so wonderfully, classically gsr, plus that little bit of “we’ve been together forever by now” extra sauce.

anyway.

among all of the other stuff about the reboot that i don’t enjoy—including how very much the whole production feels like a “first draft” as opposed to a “finished product”—i do appreciate getting to see this incarnation of my otp, where there’s just so obviously so much history and knowing between them as a couple.

it’s very validating.

thanks for the question! please feel welcome to send another any time.

[vitos-ordination-song]

I watched NGE and RGU back to back in junior year of high school. NGE was like a gut punch, it was mind expanding, introduced me to a lot of new ideas, and generally was exactly what I needed at the time. RGU, on the other hand, wasn’t something I could process—I shoved it to the back of my mind. I thought it was good, but I didn’t have the intellectual or emotional tools to really parse it.

I’m not sure exactly why there was a difference in my responses. Both works are challenging and untraditional. I guess it was that NGE operates on a very visceral level, while I’ve observed that Ikuhara works take multiple watches and quite a bit of time to incorporate into a narrative and emotional framework. Like, both throw a lot at you, but in NGE, that creates this battering ram against the psyche of the audience, whereas with RGU, you have to do a lot of mental work before the deeper emotional connections form.

It’s interesting because the works really are similar, and so this is mostly a matter of execution and aim. For instance, thinking back, it’s strange that I was fully able to connect to Misato’s narrative, while I pretty much zipped Nanami and Anthy’s stories away in some dark corner of my mind. I felt all the pain of having a deep childhood wound, but I just wanted that pain poked at. No one in NGE ever resolves anything, ultimately, though a couple breakthroughs and words of hope are given—mostly it’s just walking around in severe depression, self-hatred, trauma, abandonment issues, you name it. Misato dies with the exact same problems she started with. I was miserable and that’s what spoke to me. But RGU seems to have touched an even deeper place in me. In a weird way, maybe it’s because it was more restrained; so much isn’t said, so much more is implied than seen, and emotions build up quietly in the background. It felt like something getting under my skin. When I rewatched in 2020, I was surprised by how much of it I had avoided thinking about for years after watching it—specifically episodes 30-38. So many little moments unsettled me to the point where I didn’t want to think about them, like Nanami’s realizations about her relationship to Touga, Anthy handing over the “roses,” or Akio telling Utena that she’s just as bad as him for accepting his advances.

I’ll always love NGE for what it did for me. It helped me through times in my life when I felt horrible, suicidal, left out in the cold. NGE made me feel like I wasn’t alone. It was after i got over issues it helped me process that I was ready for RGU. RGU is a story which asks you to go farther, into adulthood, which NGE gestured at but never really reached (not a criticism, they’re just different stories). The final reason I think I had a harder time w RGU is that it’s about stripping away illusions. NGE was always kinda about depressed people psychoanalyzing themselves, but RGU starts on a more surface level and then goes deeper, demolishing the characters’ projected images. It showed me a vision of having what was most precious to me, what sustained me, ripped away. Ikuhara works are all about loss: loss of ideals, loss of relationships, loss of self-image. That was too much for me to take at age 16. But six years later, I was ready for it, and it blew me away. It gave me a vision of what comes after loss: what cannot be lost, a life of freedom and connection where one actively shapes one’s own future.

[duhragonball]

Janwum III Update: 7827

Been a while since I checked in on this front, so let’s pull up a chair, swing it around to sit in it backwards, and discuss the state of this writing project.

Basically, I set out to do a big chunk of the 2023 apocrypha liveblog, and knock out 20,000 words in my fic in the same month.  I had a plan to write 645 words each day, figuring I could liveblog stuff and still have time left over to sneak in the writing.  Also, I keep trying to challenge myself to write consistent daily word goals, and I thought this would be the way to do it. 

But around Day 12 or so I got fed up with switching back and forth, and the GT posts were coming along so well that I decided to shift my focus to just that.  And now I’ve got GT liveblog posts queued up through the end of the Baby Saga, which leaves me just six days to finish the Janwum goal. 

Honestly, I think this worked out for the best, as I now have to average a little over 2k words per day, and I now have a clear shot to do so, where before I was constantly distracting myself with the other thing.  I guess I’m just not much of a multitasker.  Given two jobs with the same deadline, I’ll always try to push as far forward with one as I can go before tackling the other.  Fortunately, I took this into account when I planned the year, but I was just so eager to start the liveblog that I couldn’t wait until after I had written the 20k.  I should have just flip-flopped the order from the start. 

Also, punting a story 645 words at a time is kind of a pain in the ass.  If I’m not feeling it, a small word goal is going to feel just as agonizing as a longer one, and if I am feeling it, I’m just cutting off my own momentum.  I probably should have made sure to reach 10000 before stopping, but I pumped the brakes for a reason and I shouldn’t second-guess it now. 

In any event, critiquing GT has been very instructive for me, as I feel like I have a better handle on what works and what doesn’t in a fictional fight scene.  A big problem I have with writing Demigra is that it’s really unclear what he can and can’t do, and his power level is literally “strong enough to give your OC a hard time, but still lose.” It’s a lot like General Rildo, actually. 

Also, one thing I wasn’t counting on was how rewatching GT has taken me back to 2004-2006, when I first came up with Luffa.  I still remember looking up the “List of Vegetables” article on Wikipedia at my job to pick out her name.  I wanted more out of Dragon Ball, and GT had been such a disappointment that I realized I would have to write my own stuff to get what I wanted, and yet I couldn’t think of a way to continue the canon story that would satisfy me.  So I started thinking about making my own Super Saiyan, and realized the distant past would be a blank slate for me to work with.  And GT’s mishandling of Pan and Bulla had a lot to do with my wanting to make the OC a woman. 

Occasionally, I’ve questioned some of the decisions I’ve made with the fic.  It gets pretty dark and violent in places, but then I rewatch the stale, saccharine hijinks in GT, and I remember how fed up I was with it.  Not everything has to be edgy, but Funimation promoted GT with a lot of grim, ominous ads.  The dub narrator always sounded like he was about to tell local prosecutors how he disposed of the bodies.   But then the anime itself would always be Pan whining about some damn thing, and Goku saying he’s hungry again.  I wanted something with more bite to it, and it’s taken me umpteen years to make it happen, but I’m doing it.

Well, I need to get cracking.  I’ll see you later.

[geeburieru]

Sight and Sound’s Greatest Films of All Time watch challenge #1 - Get Out (film =95 out of 100)

Every decade, BFI’s Sight and Sound puts out a list of the 100 greatesr films of all time as decided by a group of critics, programmers, curators, archivists, and academics. The latest poll invited 1,639 of these people to participate on their critic’s choice list, a number that significantly dwarfs the number of participants in ever decade prior. For this reason alone, it makes complete sense why Get Out made the cut, being one four films made during the last then years to make it and one of six films to tie for the coveted final few spots on the list. The expansion of who gets to participate had significantly shifted the positions of films that were present on older lists and added some great new films. Much like the shift in Academy voting for the Oscars, this change shows a dedication to ensuring that the arts truly are open to all

Get Out, of course, is notable on its own for being Peele’s feature debut as a director. It’s so strong in its script, acting, editing, and visuals. It’s clear where Peele’s inspirations come from, watching this film. There’s some Kubrick in there, some Lynch, but Peele makes those styles into his own, combining it all with biting satire. The satire was so good that Get Out practically kickstarted a new form of self-conscious horror, for better or worse. Rewatching this was just a lot of fun. It had been a few years since I last saw it and it still holds up well today. Finding new bits of foreshadowing is always exciting and only serves to keep me engaged on a rewatch. I’m looking forward to seeing how other films that I’ve seen before that also made the list hold up!

[snake-in-a-trenchcoat]

Nymphadora Tonks head canons

I’ve been rewatching the Harry Potter movies and now I have a ton of head canons of Tonks so here we go 

- Tonks being best friends with Charlie Weasley

- The two were in the same year, could you imagine all their pranks. I mean it’s a Weasley and a transforming Sirius Black clone

- Tonks would make themself look like professors, even Dumbledore, to prank other students

- Tonks was never scared of werewolves. It never occurred to her to even be scared of them. (In the Hogwarts game, Tonks is confused on why Penny would be scared of werewolves.)

- Tonks has ADHD

- Tonks is pansexual (Apparently, in an interview, Natalia Tena said she thought they were pan so-) 

- Tonks is also genderfluid, but they are in the closest. I mean do you really think the only thing that she can change is her hair? (fyi I do not believe this would be the reason Lupin likes her, I head canon him as bi) 

- If they didn’t have a kid, Tonks and Lupin were just platonically married because Lupin was in love with Sirius and Tonks was in love with someone who was def not a guy. 

- Why is Tonk’s signature hair color pink? Tonks hated the color pink as a kid, but Andromeda and Ted kept buying her pink stuff and Tonks hated it. One day Tonks saw a picture of her as a little kid, with bright bubblegum pink hair. After showing the picture to their mom, Andromeda just laughed and told Tonks that whenever Tonks would laugh or smile, their hair would turn bubblegum pink. Every time Andromeda or Ted saw stuff that was bright pink, they thought of Tonk’s smile. After that, it became Tonk’s favorite color.

- Her nickname from Remus before they started dating was ‘Cottontail’ 

- If they were alive during Teddy’s time at the school, Tonks would only send howlers 

now for a sadder head canon 

- Tonks is six years old and she sees a picture of her mom with two other girls. One has curly black hair, and the other smooth blonde hair. Tonks took this as a challenge and transformed into the blonde girl and went to show her mother. Andromeda turned around and saw her little sister, Narcissa. She wasn’t looking at Andromeda with disgust anymore, she was smiling. It took everything for Andromeda not to break down and cry. 

[feelingofcontent]

DNP Rewatch: A Week in the Life of Dan and Phil!

Date video was published: 04/22/2018 (X)

DNP Main Channel Rewatch: 376

A DITL-style video! The first one of those since Australia (unless you count Dan and Phil AND DOGS! which you could).

0:00 - love the crew member standing there to help but DNP just going too fast, lol

0:05 - what is Dan doing, lol

0:09 - “d-don’t do that” Dan had immediate regrets

0:15 - floppy Phil quiff 🥺

0:51 - aww at the pastel plushies in the background

1:02 - the “good vibes” shirt! sad that Phil doesn’t wear this one anymore because it shrunk. especially now that we know that DNP are always sending “vibes” to each other. Phil also even wore that red jacket for his passport photo at this time...the II branding was strong

1:16 - extreme shaky-cam. filming while walking does not work that well

1:40 - ahahaha “I’ve already done enough yoga with you” reference to the yoga challenge bit of Giving The People What They Want

1:53 - “this is literally pornography” 😳 for Dan at least I guess... I am impressed with Phil’s all-in-one-motion stand there

2:01 - Dan once again with a strange sitting position

2:22 - they would see the real set for the first time a few days after this video was posted

2:27 - awww at Dan’s soft voice for the “for you, Phil”

2:41 - I mean...that is probably a 6-foot tall door which isn’t that short

2:47 - Dan smile 🥺

2:59 - <surreal meme appears fullscreen> of course

3:18 - even while rehearsing together all day...still having lunch together too 😭 wanting to spend that much time with another person is really something

3:25 - not even close with that throw from Dan 😂

3:40 - Phil getting so high-pitched with nervousness there. and I love most of the crew in the background not even caring what is happening, lol

4:01 - “it’s actually nice” what was Phil expecting, lol

4:06 - “stop doing that” as he zooms in on it more ...alright

4:27 - well then.

4:33 - “hello nips” wtf. also the banter back and forth on it afterwards is great

4:52 - “pigeon fest” was what they did for April Fool’s Day in 2018. also, Phil with matching socks! that plant does survive and thrive

5:07 - still shocked they filmed basically in bed and then put it in the video. 2018...so loud

5:28 - also jesus christ Dan’s hands are huge. how does he even type on that laptop

5:46 - I know this is a meme reference (right?) but Dan saying “six me” in that voice is um. something.

5:52 - that sweatshirt looks like it would be very hot to rehearse in

6:10 - LMAO at Phil desperately covering his dick. and the crew laughing in the background throughout this clip

6:18 - and Phil telling Dan “cover your balls, it does hurt” but Dan choosing to protect his face instead 😂 I guess we know what’s important to each of them, ahahaha

6:34 - they are having fun with this

7:05 - love that Dan is so anti-props while Phil has an entire props chest at home

7:13 - that is...quite the selection especially before seeing the show at all

7:43 - nice dodge there from Phil, and then straight to the banana eating, lol. which Phil did not have to include in the video but did even after saying not to film it

7:51 - god I love this casual clip that doesn’t even have anything to do with the show 😭 like...Dan just spending time in the lounge while Phil plays a video game. a regular evening.

8:12 - Dan’s red patch is out. also, I love that we found out in one of the stereo shows that Phil is the one who encouraged Dan to play piano for part of the show

8:33 - fond teasing

8:35 - again, before knowing where this falls in the show...this was quite the teaser, haha

8:52 - and now we have to live with the knowledge that these came from a sex shop...thanks stereo era

9:18 - oh Phil...that was an easy one!

9:39 - love that Dan does not approve of that question. and that in typical little-brother fashion, Phil just shocks him again 😂

9:52 - love the random things scrolling across the screen in the background

10:04 - so much detailed planning

10:20 - and implying that without it, they would just stand next to each other the whole time

10:25 - haircut time! both of their hair was very long in the previous clips. also, having someone come and give you a haircut in your own bedroom sounds quite convenient. also the haircut guy wearing a very Dan-esque shirt

10:35 - awww at encouraging Dan 🥺

10:45 - another clip they really didn’t have to include but chose to

10:51 - Dan had posted pictures of that and some of the concept art previously

11:16 - lol at the different accent Phil is putting on for each of them

11:51 - Dan really wants to put meaning on things

12:02 - the merch was released just a few days after this video

12:22 - so much back and forth between the living flat and filming flat in this video

12:29 - “you’re not naked, are you?” wtf Phil

12:50 - “you’re pulling it off” Phil is used to Dan’s ...unique...fashion choices at this point I think. Dan liked it enough to post photos in it that day too

13:03 - lots of social media content from this warm day...a Phil tweet and Instagram photo (posted a couple days later) too

13:29 - Dan was not enjoying the wasps that came out in the warm weather

14:12 - it does look so dystopian compared to all the other buildings

14:37 - how even. so lucky

14:45 - Phil’s got the same shirt on but Dan’s changed out of the romper

15:08 - Phil sticking to the “everything is improved with a bit of glitter” bit, haha

15:29 - “foot content”. also, still have all the TATINOF cubes left in teh background as decoration from the Easter baking video

15:38 - now Phil has changed into comfy pjs. also, sitting right next to each other on the couch, again after spending the whole day together already... and more “foot content” although Phil’s in this case

16:10 - love Phil filming Dan like this. same vibe as him filming Dan directing the trailer in The Making Of ‘The Amazing Book is Not on Fire’

16:26 - this must have been the very last day of rehearsals. don’t know about that singing...

16:48 - Phil watching Dan talk in this car clip 🥺

17:23 - Dan must have won...we never see Phil wearing those sunglasses

17:26 - Phil had posted a photo with the cherry blossom back in early April when it was blooming

17:55 - they really did start posting insta stories in the days right after this (1, 2)

18:49 - literally almost entirely fried things and dips there

Unlike Giving The People What They Want, this probably does make a “top 10″ list of joint videos for me. I love it so much. I think I just like the casual style a lot.

Phil posted this less than a week before their first II show in Brighton. They also hung out with PJ and Sophie while they were there. Also these (1, 2) stories. 👀 And this one.

[shadowsong26fic]

Coming Attractions!

Short one again, and technically a day late, ah well.

As always, feel free to check out my writing discord; and I’ll hang out for an Open Question Night if y’all are interested!

I also have a couple of meme/question lists open (one; two; three; four; five); feel free to send me some of those (please specify which list)!

Star Wars Projects:

Precipice!verse: Still not officially on hiatus because I am Determined not to let that happen, lol. I am...admittedly not sure when the next chapter/next Preludes story will come out, but.

SWBB: I am starting to toy with stuff for next year, but I don’t have a concrete idea yet...still leaning towards a BSG crossover because there’s a lot of Interesting Stuff I could do there (especially in PT/TCW era, which has always been my SW home, so to speak).

AtLA Projects:

On hold for the moment...I couldn’t sustain the momentum, alas. But I’m sure sooner or later (probably sooner) something will pop up that will get me to start Actively Working on at least the Avatar Zuko story, and maybe one of the others.

Castlevania Projects:

I swear I really am working on Incinctus XD It’s just this next chapter is being a pain in the ass; I’ve got the like...two or three after it essentially ready but This One.

BSG Projects:

The Other Battlestar is actually coming along! I’m probably just going to go in chronological order, which does mean spending a solid chunk at the beginning introducing four (or possibly five) OCs who are central to the plot (Pegasus SMO Daphne [Last Name Still Needed]; the marine officer formerly known as Rex who needs renamed [as I complained about the other day lol]; Replacement VP [who...also needs a name, lol...]; and then Atia [who does all the Science Stuff]; I am also putting a Four in play because I can, but he might not get introduced until Pegasus happens to that civilian fleet.)

...yeah, there are still some missing names here XD I’m also still not super happy with the title, but I have yet to come up with a better one...and toying with the idea of doing one POV per chapter and having the POV character as the chapter title (like I did with Take a Bond of Fate; or some other internal structure, but that can be settled once I have more text.

But I did have fun earlier today poking at Fleet!Cavil and how some of his gambits are altered. Little taste (rough/unedited/draft-y; not sure I like some of the wording I’m using here, but still):

He could, technically, refer to them as Shelly and Vera, but it felt so...undignified, to think of them as anything other than what they were. They were Cylons, not humans. The names were a convenient fiction while they were completing the genocide.

And now, he supposed, the mop-up after.

Still, a way to distinguish them would be useful, especially since they had gone to such lengths to distinguish themselves. Fine. Six-A would be the buttoned-up librarian, and Six-B would be the clever prostitute.

Anyway, I’m going to keep pushing at this; goal is to work on it a little bit each day and hopefully these holes will fill in as I go. I’m also thinking ahead to NaNo, and how I want to split my time there...but hopefully I’ll have started posting this before we get there, lol.

(As for other BSG projects--various random prompts that have flitted around my brain; Serenissima; pondering a For Sorrow Sung rewrite--those are not a Focus at the moment but are definitely hanging around and might see some movement as well. I also need to get back to my rewatch...)

Other Fanfic Projects:

My PodTogether project went live! It is a Leverage/Nikita crossover, and I had a great time putting it together and working with farkenshnoffingottom (who was my podficcer).

Original Fic:

I do love the summer challenges on Rainbowfic because I always get stuff done there, lol. I think I did some really nice things this time around.

I am vaguely poking at some of the other/more long-term projects (Lady Mordred; one or two alternate history things; that first contact novel I was working on for NaNo one year...) but no actual text has made it down lately. I should get back into those...

...I think that pretty much sums it up!

[ailendolin]

I restrained myself from asking all 10 questions about various fics you’ve written 😄

1. Of the fics you’ve written, which is your favorite and why?

9. Which idea came to you first in Brave?

Thank you so much for sending me these! I’ll happily answer more if you’d like to know something else 💙

1. Of the fics you’ve written, which is your favorite and why?

This one is honestly very hard to answer because I have written a lot of fics over the years (98 are published on AO3 alone), not to mention the WIPs I haven’t posted yet and thus can’t really talk about .

When it comes to Six Idiots fics, Flashback, Brave and The first step are definitely among my personal favourites.

Flashback was the first fic I wrote for the Ghosts fandom and that alone makes it very dear to me. I love that it explores an aspect of Thomas the show so far has only briefly hinted at (his trauma-related reaction to sudden, loud noises) and set me down the path that ultimately led to the creation of Norne (I still can’t believe that actually happened lol).

Brave is one of my favourites because of its set up and the alternate universe it created. I never thought I would be writing fics about the Evil Overlords since the show doesn’t really give us much in terms of character development or background information on them but in the end coming up with my own headcanons was what made writing the story (and it’s sequels) so much fun.

The first step is special because it was my first time writing anything from Julian’s pov and I loved the challenge that presented. It’s hard to keep a character like him realistic and I had to do a lot more editing work on that fic than I normally do. But I think the end result was worth it, and I like that the fic works quite well with canon.

An honourable mention goes to an as of yet unnamed Ghosts WIP I’ve been working on for months now. It’s currently at 17k words and I have two chapters left to write, plus an epilogue. This fic is my baby and even though Thomas is its main character, one of my favourite things about it is how prominent the found family trope is in it. A lot of the other ghosts get to have their moments to shine too because The Plot affects not only Thomas but everyone else as well.

9. Which idea came to you first in Brave?

I think Brave began when I was rewatching Yonderland for the first time and realised that Dissectus got killed off. Somehow, that went completely over my head the first time round. I was shocked. So my mind immediately went: how can I change that without changing what happens in canon? The idea was for Negatus and Dissectus to become allies and staging the whole thing. But that begged the question: why would Dissectus want that?

And that’s where Brave truly began to take shape. I needed to give Dissectus a reason to desert, and that reason ended up being Voltari getting hurt by Cuddly Dick which then led to the idea of Cuddly Dick using Voltari’s own eye piece to do it. Everything after that came together during the writing process.

Ask Game can be found here.

[chainofclovers]

This Way Up season 2 thoughts and feelings

We finished watching the second season of This Way Up last night (watched it in two sittings over Friday and Saturday) and I liked it a lot more than I thought I would though the season did feel uneven at times. The story also made me feel incredibly, incredibly sad, and my brain is so cluttered with thoughts that I'm not sure I'll be able to actually make sense of the show if I don't just go on and share my impressions, as scattered, self-indulgent, and based on the limited memory of a single viewing as they are.

Where was I when I was watching this season of television?

Physically, I was on the couch with my wife, repeatedly remembering and forgetting that the Olympics were happening. And so, interspersed with this deep dive into the mental health and personal and professional challenges of London-based Irish sisters Áine and Shona, I experienced some archery, skateboarding (those bros honestly seem tooooo cool to even want to come to something as embarrassingly earnest as the Olympics, but good for them!), and men's gymnastics.

Mentally, I was contemplating some significant professional (and, yes, personal in their way) life events that are neither here nor there for tumblr dot com. I was also considering the season two premiere of Ted Lasso and my fannish relationship to that show. For it is true--the person I was while watching season 1 of This Way Up is not the same person who watched season 2 this weekend, because in the meantime a 45-year old white man from Kansas (and every person he knows) managed to become my primary media preoccupation, and I am surprisingly chill about how not chill I am about this anxiety-ridden ray of sunshine/football coach (both footballs). But as we all know, being chill does not mean feeling chill. That make sense?

Anyway. This Way Up. It's about to become a mess of spoilers and feelings in here, so venture behind the cut if you dare!

For Obvious Queer Reasons I was extremely curious to find out what happens between Shona and Charlotte and Shona and Vish. As such, while it was uncomfortable to watch, I think my favorite scene in the whole season is when Shona and Vish have video chat sex and Shona has this intrusive memory of sleeping with Charlotte that feels like the ONLY moment in the entire season that she isn't performing or editing herself in some way.

My other favorite moment is when Charlotte talks about how upsetting it is to feel like a "lesson learned" chapter in Shona's autobiography.

I cannot believe I'm about to type these words, but I think the writing on this show might actually put too much trust in viewers to pick up on things. I know, this never happens! This is my dream! Why am I typing this? But hear me out. I think there are a lot of interesting parallels in terms of whether Shona and Vish (established, engaged, committed) and Áine and Richard (new, taboo [but is it really that crazy that she ends up dating the dad of someone she tutors?], exploratory) are truly able to listen to each other and accept each other's needs. It's about honesty or lack thereof, and it's also about what's really happening inside someone's mind. It's such an incredible moment when Richard tells Áine he likes that she's always so "up" and she has this private moment where you can see this heartbreak in her eyes because of course we know that she really struggles with her mental health and with depression. And I like that the show has both Bradley and Charlotte in the position of being on the overlapping outside of those relationships, offering their own wisdom from a place of really, really caring about Áine and Shona. But I just wanted MORE of that. This episodes are so short, and I needed there to be more of a tight story about those parallels, more of a sense that we'd hurtle towards some kind of revelation by episode 6.

I realize this is a thing about UK shows, but these seasons are just too short. The episodes are like 24 minutes long and there are only six of them and I felt that while you could create an effective season of TV with those constraints, this season jumped between scenes too frequently. I wanted to live in the scenes for longer. I didn't want to feel like I was watching the editing and decisions about what to show happen before my eyes.

If season 3 happens, my second biggest dream is that Bradley and Áine can have a conversation following up from the observation that it would be nice to be with someone they're just comfortable with (spoken while they're slumped on the couch together having one of the warmest conversations two characters share all season). My biggest dream is that Shona and Charlotte can have a respectful conversation about how Shona defines her sexuality. I want Shona to be safe explaining if she'd want to use the term bisexual or queer or pan or even lesbian or some combination of those terms. Not because the labels are the most useful thing, but because in this case it would be incredibly useful for her to force herself to choose some words, not in the context of feeling Vish-related pressure. To be brave enough to describe herself, and to be safe enough to know that Charlotte isn't going to make some snide comment about men. It's totally fair that Charlotte is so hurt, but she needs to be able to listen, too.

I do think this season does an incredible job capturing Shona's intense ambivalence about herself, and how she is SCRAMBLING to deflect from that by focusing on her sister, work, family, wedding-planning, the hen do, basically anything but dealing with her own little brain and heart. I mean, when COVID starts to arrive in their lives, it feels like she really wants Vish's asthmatic uncle to be the golden ticket they need to call off the wedding.

I have mixed feelings about how frequently Áine references the feeling of being an actor or the feeling of experiencing things as someone might in a movie or show or the feeling that someone else is treating her as an actor or character rather than as a real person. I think it's an interesting thing to write about, but upon first watch I struggled to figure out if it was a commentary on the other parts of the story or an additional thread Aisling Bea wanted to weave into an already incredibly short season of TV.

It was very jarring to have a COVID plot. The only mainstream media I've seen so far with a COVID plot is--LOL (to quote Áine, who says LOL so many times this season)--the final scene of the Saved By the Bell remake. Again I say LOL!!! I didn't hate it or love it, necessarily, I just thought it felt strange because we're still in the pandemic and everything is strange.

Everything with Tom was so, so, so painful. I don't know if I can even get into it. I just felt visceral devastation and was hurtled into strong memories about people in my own life who died prematurely. (Suicide but not only suicide.) The way the last scene ended felt like--immediate tears just pulled from my eyes without me even realizing what was happening. And God, the way Tom-in-the-flashback calls her a "soppy cunt" (I think?) and we realize Áine used those exact words to jokingly refer to Richard's previous girlfriend who was a human rights lawyer? GOD.

While Áine and Shona don't really engage with each other in the same way my sister and I do, my sister and I are also really, really close and I'm the older sister and watching this show always gives me a lot of emotions about siblings. This is actually part of why the rapid scene cuts and feeling that they both were leaving so much unarticulated stressed me out. Áine nails it at the end when Shona has finally told her about Charlotte and she says Shona needs to tell her more, but I wanted to SEE that conversation happen. I wanted to FEEL Áine's reaction, because Áine's reaction matters more than Vish's or their mother's or anyone else's. It was frustrating!

I dunno, y'all. I really love this show. I think it is exactly what it wants to be. I could not tell you today if I will ever rewatch it even though I (think I) still consider it a favorite. I honor and respect the fundamental messiness and pain and hilarity of this show. What a wild experience.

[lover-of-trash-and-people]

shadow and bone rewatch s1e6 while drinking mid-range scotch

I wish I have a face that is as unlined and pretty as Ben Barnes' when I'm 39

Arken you dirty dirty liar

the face Alek is making at his lies that he knows are lies firstly because he knows the art of lying so well and also because he can read people very well

okay Ivan is kind of a bad bitch with his smirk at Arken's lies

alek's eyes narrowing and his little smile when Arken says 'im an entertainer' bitch I love this show

*grabs hand, pulls up sleeve, and discovers Arken's hand is full of marks indicating successful passages through the fold* 'well, that is certainly entertaining' I love this man with all my heart

him screaming is so fucking hot, is that weird for me to say

Nina being the Darkling's spy is quite interesting

Ben giving the Darkling crazy eyes when Arken owns up to his guilt is so cool

also wtf is Arken a fool trying to negotiate with possibly the strongest man in the world

kind of loved the darkness literally eating him

also love Alina learning to use her powers better when she is alone than when she is with anyone else, wish we got to see the cut in this season as per the books, ah can't have everything I guess

the camera pan to Jesper's gun at his side, amazing

god Jessie is literally so beautiful I need to see her bring Alina to the peak of her power so bad

netflix you better renew this series to let the plot run to its completion

HOW THE FUCK DID THEY CAST THE CROWS SO PERFECTLY

INEJ FUCKING TREMBLING JUST THE TINIEST BIT AS SHE BOWS SLIGHTLY TO ALINA SGSHSBSJJSJSSJ MY TWO QUEENS

'And where is my Summoner?' my little Darklina heart ouchie I really wish you hadn't used and manipulated her like this Alek it was incredibly fucked up especially considering you actually caught feelings

'Ivan and I won't fail you' oh Fedyor my baby, my angel, you don't deserve what is coming

Helnik literally recreating Titanic lmao stop this is a joke

I too would jump off the raft if I came to consciousness to see a gorgeous woman with magical powers with her hand on my back

omg but why is ryevost so pretty though

'I know exactly how she felt. The King's soldiers treated me the same way... I'm not myself today.' why must you do this to me, why must you fuel my darklina soulmates agenda idiocy

I don't quite think I have a problem with the Zoya Darkling relationship as much as I have a problem with the line they chose to reveal it to use with.

my drink's over and I don't know if I should have another, considering that it's 7 am

the tenderness with which he looks at Zoya and takes her hand and then when he says 'I shall relax when I have Alina' makes me believe more that the man that is reduced to tears time and again in front of Alina could in fact be the master manipulator I know him to be

god I can't wait for Zoya's character arc

'I speak six languages, it's part of my job' why is Nina literally the fucking coolest

Alina blinding the oprichniki was so hot, I can't wait to see more of her power and her ruthlessness

I know I've said it before but good god is Jessie Mei Li gorgeous

HER LITTLE SMILE AMONGST ALL THE PANIC AS SOON AS SHE SEES MAL, THE AUDACITY OF THIS SHOW TO MAKE ME FEEL THIS WAY

THE SCORE COMING IN AT THE RIGHT MOMENT, THEIR HANDS MEETING, HER SMILE AGAIN DHDHSBSNSNSNSNAN IM IN PAIN

REALLY?! YOU'RE GONNA GO DIRECTLY FROM MALINA TO HELNIK WITH NO CONCERN FOR MY HEART?

I simply cannot get over Calahan's accent lmao it's really funny

'im not afraid of you' he says to the insanely gorgeous girl with magic

HIM HANGING HIS HEAD IN DEFEAT TO INDICATE NINA HAS MADE VALID POINTS YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND I CAN'T BREATHE

'You're just a man. Like all the others.' she says and then forgets her train of thought looking at him as he strips. god I love this

not sleeping all night and then scotch is not a good idea, I think

'I promise not to ravish you' 'I hate the way you talk' her hand on his chest, his hand gripping hers, my fucking heart feels like it's about to explode

good god these shooting locations and sets are so beautiful

Alina throwing the flask at Mal and Mal going 'OI!' I fucking can't, I guess I am a

simp for childhood friends to lovers, give me more of that banter and childhood friend energy, I am thriving

wow it literally seems like they took book! Mal sl*tshaming book! Alina and made show! Alina sl*tshame show! Mal, hmm, interesting

'They would have split us up!' MAL'S LITTLE SMILE AT THIS, and the 'You wrote me letters?' Mal's nod, the Malina yearning stare, the Malina hug, 'thank you for finding me' 'always. I'll always find you.' NO MALINA YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND YOU HAVE MADE ME ABSOLUTELY FUCKING FERAL

I understand they had to split time between my ravkan babies and the crows and that is why there were several aspects that were sort of not reflected on enough but Alina's training at the Little Palace, Alina's cut, Mal's personality, a teensy bit of backstory for the crows, maybe one lockpicking scene from my boy Kaz

random note: we have far too many idols and paintings and pictures and whatnot of Hindu deities in our house apart from the specially designed temple (we are Hindus, so maybe it's not that weird but it's a little weird)

Kaz's cane is a literal star, it's so beautiful my heart wants to explode

'Why would Heleen get the Crow Club?' *literally fucking gets up and walks aways instead of answering the fucking question* I LITERALLY CAN'T BREATHE I'M LOSING MY MIND

'I know that voice' WHO GAVE YOU THE RIGHT TO MAKE ME FIGHT FOR PLATONIC SHIPS IN FANDOMS

'We won't starve' omg get you someone who packs food for you when you go on the run together hiding from your ex who wants to capture you and use your powers as a weapon against your consent

Mal looking surprised at her summoning sunlight, Alina looking cautiously at him waiting for him to disapprove or run for the hills in fear or smth like that, 'I'm sorry it took me this long to see you... But I see you now' my dumb little shipper trash heart ouch

they really said we're gonna feed you this part asian couple as the protagonists in this show in 2021 and guess what I'm eating it's really tasty I'm very satisfied as a south asian

NINA'S LITTLE SMILE WHEN MATTHIAS WAKES UP WITH HIS ARM AROUND HER

'I can feel how much you hate sleeping next to me' 👀👀👀 BITCH SAID IMMA SPILL THE TEA AND THEN SHE DID

it's 8 am and guess what I'm getting another drink my parents have c*vid and are in govt qu*r*ntine centres there is nobody to supervise or stop me

I too say 'Why do you have to say things like that?' to my pretty crush when she flirts with me

Nina smiling at Matthias bragging about his conservative ways is my aesthetic

'No, it's not natural for someone to be as stupid as he is tall and yet, oh, there you stand.' MY FUCKING QUEEN

Matthias laughing uncontrollably at Nina saying something which isn't even that funny is a whole ass vibe

Kaz Brekker saying 'The Black General' ooh fuck yeah

YESSSS STEP OUT OF THAT CARRIAGE ALL SEXY BLACK GENERAL

isn't alcohol supposed to like kill germs? well, the amount in my system definitely will

I love my crows so much (always but this time particularly for setting that alarm in the stolen carriage)

ooh Polina recognising Inej by the knife yesss let's go writers

this Ivan Jesper showdown is all I needed from life and yet did not know about

Ivan taking off his cloak was, um, sexier than I wanted it to be

I just realised how thirsty I am going to sound in this post

'Has no one told you that keftas are Fabrikator-made and resistant to bullets, hmm?' 'Oh, I do love a challenge' LITERALLY EVERYTHING

im sorry to be pointing out flaws in a perfect show and adaptation but the line delivery on 'You robbed me of my brother, now I'll rob you of your life' from Polina was kind of weak

'You're a-' *gets knocked out with the back of a gun* LMAO we love the hints

got excited at the prospect of kaz v. zoya until I realised they will not be letting the opportunity of kaz v. darkling pass up

my goodness is Amita Suman a splendid actress

I AM NOT KIDDING WHEN I TELL YOU I SQUEALED WHEN I SAW DARKLES EMERGE OUT OF THE SHADOWS IN FRONT OF MY BABY BOY KAZ

THERE BEING ACTUAL FEAR OR ATLEAST DOUBT ON KAZ'S FACE, THE LITTLE BACK STEPS AS

THE DARKLING WALKS TOWARDS HIM, AAAAH I CAN'T

THE DARKLING STOPPING AT KAZ SAYING 'SHE FLED ON HER OWN' AND THE HINT OF TEARS THAT WE SEE IN HIS EYES

'IT WAS PRETTY CLEAR SHE WASN'T INTERESTED IN BEING A CAPTIVE ANYMORE' YOU TELL HIM, KING

*ACTUAL FUCKING TEARS IN THE DARKLING'S EYES AS THE SHADOWS APPROACH*

NOT ME YOWLING LIKE A HYENA THAT THIS CHILD OUTSMARTED THE MOST POWERFUL MAN IN EXISTENCE WITH A FAKE MAGIC TRICK

'Are you sure you added enough cloves?' literally warranting a wide ass smile from my queen Alina making my entire fucking day

for some reason, no matter how much I push it from my mind, Ben Barnes dressed up as the Darkling, dancing to 'push it' keeps coming to mind, it's absolutely ridiculous

I got somehow distracted with interviews but good things came out of that as it gave my body the time for the booze to kick in

and I would just like to say that I love Leigh for all she has given me

Alina is so fucking compassionate, I have no much love for her. I can feel her guilt and her sorrow as Mal talks of Mikhail and Dubrov

don't particularly like how the stag plotline is woven in, could have been executed better

'You're afraid you might start to like me?' *flaps furs like a bird's wings in frustration*

'I DO like you' my fucking heart you idiots

the sexual tension is so palpable and the moment is so intimate I simply cannot

OMG SHE FUCKING FELL

that moment where you think he might let her fall despite having read the books and he doesn't and he tells her his name I- <3

YOU DARE TRANSITION FROM A HELNIK SCENE TO A KANEJ SCENE YOU REALLY HAVE NO MERCY FOR MY HEART HUH

people have talked about this endlessly but Freddie's little jaw tic after he says Inej because Inej is wounded and he can't physically bring himself to help her I fucking cannot

THE MUSIC PICKING UP AS KAZ LOOKS TO THE DARKLING'S CARRIAGE I CAN'T WITH THIS SHOW ANYMORE

and now for one of my favorite scenes in television and cinematic history, David Kostyk throwing a book at Jesper Fahey without even knowing who he is merely because he opens the door of his carriage and says hello to him before getting knocked out by Kaz Brekker while trying to run away

Immediately followed by another, the scene with David Kostyk raising his finger to put forward his point in front of the Darkling and the Darkling trying to let him know he doesn't have to before obliging is one of my favourite scenes in the world

also sir please stop being devastatingly attractive in your glorious appearance with your face and your black kefta and cloak because all that comes to mind is Ayesha Erotica's Emo Boy and I'm afraid that is terribly inappropriate.

'No, you look great.' *literally looks down from embarrassment or blushing* MALINA RIGHTS?

THE LOOK ON THE DARKLING'S FACE BEFORE HE SAYS 'NO ORDINARY TRACKER, NO ORDINARY GIRL' BITCH IM OUT OF BREATH

'ORPHANS OF KERAMZIN, REUNITED.' 'ADORABLE.' HE FUCKING SNEERED IRL I FUCKING CANNOT

GOD IT'S SO GOOD

[ace-din-djarin]

get to know me tag game

Hi!! Thanks for the tag, @trashquisitor-shirozora and @stupidfatpenguin !

rules: tag a few people you want to know better; make a new post, don’t reblog!

favorite color: purple!

currently reading: lots of various fanfictions like always; Eragon by Christopher Paolini, and The Fellowship of the Ring by JRR Tolkien

last song: Brown Eyes by Fleetwood Mac

last movie: The Green Mile (good, but ROUGH. Emotionally challenging for sure)

last series: last actual series I followed intently was TBOBF. Currently I’m rewatching The Simpsons as I work, though IDK if that counts

sweet, spicy, or savory: it really depends on my current mood and/or cravings, but I tend to go for savory or spicy more than sweet (not that I don’t have a sweet tooth!). I used to hate spicy things as a kid, but as I’ve grown older, and especially since I married my husband and started cooking family recipes (he’s Mexican) I’ve really gotten into spicy foods. Jalapeños are a staple in my fridge now!

coffee or tea: I like tea but coffee is almost always my go-to

three ships: Dinluke is obvious I think, so let’s also go with Bagginshield, ShieldHusbands (Clint/Coulson) and Codywan :D

first ever ship: hmmm. I’m not sure, but Harry Potter was some of the first fic I read so probably Wolfstar. I usually didn’t ship people who weren’t together in the actual media, tbh, probably because I personally wasn’t inclined to think of anyone that way, being a baby ace (and probably demiromantic too tbh) and not knowing it.  currently working on: so. many. WIPs. @mblogs is the only person keeping me sane in the face of all of them 😅 There’s chapter six of Far Across the Distance, chapter two of Just Give Me Time, the huge NaNo project we’re still working on (An Ever-Fixed Mark), all of which are DinLuke. Then I have a Codywan fix-it for my soulmate AU (Like the Dawn) that is still being worked on, a few new Commander Fox snippets cause he’s taken over my brain, and some tumblr prompts I promise are actually being worked on, plus other random wips for other fandoms like Daredevil and Spider-Man. Whooo! 

favorite piece of clothing: ooooh I have some great ones but I love the cozy sweater my MIL got me for christmas, I’m wearing it right now :) comfort food: probably mashed potatoes, they’re always amazing

favorite time of year: I really like fall, when it’s cool enough to start bundling up in extra layers. It’s so cozy!

fav fanfiction: Good lord, I have so many. Most recently, though, it’s their days are darker by always_a_slut_for_hc (@calamity-aims  on tumblr). It’s SUCH a good Commander Fox fix-it fic. I’m such a sucker for “this character is silently suffering and their loved ones finally realize and get them the help they need” fics and this one is IT. I love the brothers’ interactions too-- Wolffe takes care of Fox, it’s just so soft and lovely 😍  Another one is Clan of Four!!! A fantastic Dinluke fic, it deserves to be recognized as one of the classics. Beautiful writing and art by @withercrown and @a-aristippus . It’s super sweet and loving; not just romantic love, but also familial love and affection between Luke and Grogu, Din and Rey, and all four of them. It just leaves you with such a happy heart 🥰 ----

For the tags (you don’t have to, but if you want!!): @mblogs @transmascskywalker @lady-of-the-spirit @kkrazy256 @a-aristippus @withercrown @mari-wrongway @captainkirkk @purplesauris @elrhiarhodan @emilianadarling and anyone who wants to!!!