#i'll be honest i dont know how many more i want what they haves ive got left in me

[hauntedrain]

For Years! | Max Verstappen x Reader |

Social media AU Summary: Max and reader get criticism over the status of their relationship.

✮▹ A/N: So sorry for not posting for so long. Life has been BUSY. but hopefully i can post more and write more! Love you guys <3

✰▹Warnings/Notices: Not edited. nothing really. reader mentioned to write music

Liked by Max Verstappen, Lando Norris, & 3,345,678 others

@Y/N: Lovely time lately.

view all 19,234 comments

user1: LMFAO MAX.

user2: Y/N you'll always been iconic

user3: sometimes I forget Max Verstappen is dating THE Y/N L/N.

↪ user4: SO TRUE. It completely passes my mind that they've been together before he even got to F1.

↪ user5: THEY'VE BEEN TOGETHER FOR 9 YEARS?

↪ user6: YEA ITS WILD.

↪ user7: wait but they haven't gotten married or anything?

↪ user8: Yea no. They also avoid the questions around it. Kind of weird to me.

↪ user9: But hasn't Y/N written songs about marriage and getting married? Why haven't they?

↪ user10: Maybe they just don't want to. Or max doesn't.

MaxVerstappen: Why did you choose that photo of me.

↪ Y/N: You want me to post the photo from yesterday?

↪ MaxVerstappen: NO.

↪ user11: LMFAO. PARENTS.

Liked by Y/N, Redbull, & 2,345,567 others

@MaxVerstappen: Great race and great win! Getting ready for next week. And thank you to @Y/N for making me but those glasses, best purchase.

View all 14,567 comments

Y/N: I told you they were a good investment

↪ MaxVerstappen: I don't know if you would call it an investment.

↪ Y/N: I'll post that picture.

↪MaxVerstappen: It was a great investment! better than a house!

↪ user12: better than a ring?

↪ user13: STOP. but no fr, wheres the ring Max?

user14: Okay nice win but when yall getting married?

user15: everyone needs to mind their business, maybe they're just not ready to get married and that okay.

↪ user16: But its been 9 YEARS. NINE YEARS. Its a red flag.

liked by 18,234 others

@F1GOSSIP: Max Verstappen and Y/N L/N have been criticized over the status of their relationship. The couple has been together for over 9 years however many fans have realized that there's been no movement in the relationship, family and marriage vise. Thought?

view all 5,567 comments

user17: I mean its their life but 9 years?

user18: Idk guys don't hate me but sometimes max doesn't seem interested in Y/N. Like all of the Monaco GP? seem happy around her.

↪ user19: Bro look at the pictures in the post. Does he seem unhappy in them? No he seems very happy.

↪ user20: Okay but lets be honest. Both only seem that happy in front of a camera.

User21: I mean for some of their relationship they were fairly young. Maybe they just wanna enjoy it little by little.

↪ user22: I think in 9 years you can enjoy a lot.

user23: I wouldn't marry her either. Max knows what's best which is why he hasn't done it.

Y/N has posted to their story!

liked by 6,678,567 others

@MaxVerstappen: happy 3 year anniversary @Y/N. love you much and cant wait for years to come. Also, people said I hated her? How could I?

view all 35,567,878 comments

Y/N: Guys my husband is kinda cool.

↪ MaxVerstappen: Kinda?

↪ Y/N: yea cuz im cooler than you.

↪ MaxVerstappen: Okay love.

user24: WTF 3 YEARS?

user25: max said hold my 3x WDC titles while I make everyone shut up about my relationship.

↪ Y/N: He just wins everything doesn't he?

↪ CharlesLeclerc: Yea its kinda annoying. you should distract him Y/N

↪ MaxVerstappen: Dont tell my wife to distract me, I'll lose.

↪ CharlesLeclerc: thats the point.

↪ LandoNorris: I just wanna win.

↪ user26: LMFAO WHAT IS HAPPENING

↪ Y/N: Im collecting them all

User27: And people said max didnt wanna marry her.

user28: Bro just keeps winning doesnt he. Y/N GIVE ME A CHANCE.

user29: if you look closely you can see me getting run over by an F1 car.

⭒❃.✮:▹A/N: I hope you guys like it! I need to post more but ive gotten so busy and haven't had the time. But I'll try to post more often. Love you guys! hope you enjoyed.

[aachria]

I am so unbelievably nervous for this chapter pooks you dont even know it andthe title sure doesn't sound very promising at all

Writing as im reading once again but I noticed how long my chapter commentary has been gwtting so I'll tryyyy to Tone It Down but i make no promises. The length of my commentary is only dictated by how absolutely crazy you decide to make this chapter.

Ace and Sabo giving ed a shovel talk is everything ive wanted since the marriage i beg you to let ace live long enough to get mad at ed for not telling him pretty please 😭🙏

Oooh the gift for Sabo i was gonna send an ask abt it since ive been rereading the fic this weekend but i figured you wouldn't forget it

LUFFY AND SABO INTERACT8ONS 😤🦅😭😤🦅😭😤😭🦅😤😭🦅😭😤😭🦅😭🦅😭🦅🙏🙏🗣🗣🗣‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️

Im very much unready to read the strawhats be separated i have cried too many times reading this fic and im certain this will be the worst to date

STOP 😭 ed's jst going on abt keeping the crew safe and i can feel the tears coming

HOLD ON if ed is in fact staying with luffy, thing i should've guessed from last chapter, does that m3an they're meeting boa? Omg. I am suddenly so much more excited for the next set of chapters, thing that i did not think was possible.

Once again i ask myself when the fuck ed learned gymnastics 😭

Not the "i definitely did that on purpose" after they slam into a fucking building like sure you did 🤨 and i definitely believe you 🤨

"Its as straight as you can get" made me crack up

I will be so completely honest with you i have no idea what the fuck is going on like a good 40% of fights but thats jst because i have trouble translating the moves into a movie in my head

"Adam Sandler? What are you doing here? And in a bright yellow pinstripe suit sounding stoned out of his damn mind, too." I had not expected to laugh this much in this chapter i was fr bracing myself to cry. 🧍‍♀️. Now that i think abt it you might just be lowering our guard so that it hits harder 🤨

AND ED'S SAVIOR COMPLEX HITS AGAIN WITH BLAMING THEMSELVES ONCE MORE !!!

so. Luffy and Ed separation. I cant bring myself to be sad this shit was written so well 😭 just "wait for me" and "ill always find you" ugh just throw an "unquestionably" in there and id cry there could be one every chapter and id still cry every single time

Im so fucking excited for ed to meet coin hopefully next chapter 🤭

Amazing chapter as always!! Surprisingly didnt cry!! Thank you!! I cannot fucking wait for the Wednesday chapter

I pulled out the Rio Romeo you KNOW it was gonna be a rough one.

Tfw you're tying to give your baby brother's S/O the shovel talk but you're also stuck in the scaffolding at your own execution and your baby brother's S/O is also your friend who you have cried about your self worth and daddy issues to.

That fucking black book plot bunny has been hopping around FAR TOO LONG, so I had to take it out back and shoot it and by that I mean finally deliver it to it's intended recipient.

Mmmmmmm Boa

Look Ed had gymnastics beamed directly into their head by GOD does that make sense?

When I write combat I do it 70% for the vibes 20% for the quips and humor and 10% for the actual fighting. If you have no idea what is happening you and I are on the same page.

Ed got them self worth issues in them where the dog should be 💪💪💪

God I cannot wait for Coin & Ed content. Love those two.

I am so proud of you for not crying. I cried writing it. That baby was cooked with TEARS.

[kosmicdream]

im confident enough to post FFAK, which has anal prolapse, but i dont post the true drama....... my opinions about manga. *dramatic music* sometimes i kinda want to do some reviews.. its mostly me complaining.. it makes me sound so bitter like "do you like anything kosmic!" and..yes ! i do!!! okay!! i like a lot of things. once in a while, i dip my toes into a popular series to try to see if we are a good fit. Series like: Beastars, Dorohedoro, Dungeon meshi,ect.. and i kind. well. I dont like any of them LMAO. I mean, Ok, i actually really was into Beastars for a time, but after the fight with the bear guy (its been a few years sorry) and that story arc concluded.. it just spiraled to laughable levels and did not recover. I was genuinely laughing at it at times bc it kind of felt like a desperate scramble with the like. loopholes and power upgrades.. But I was invested for a time, it had a charm to me! I also loved the art and im curious about the authors next series about santa (partly because i too, am writing a story about santa). Dorohedoro has a great visual style, fun characters, i enjoyed reading but it also kinda didnt ...land for me beyond that, which is a shame. I feel like it is a series that "should" have clicked with me. And its like, not offensive to me but.. I'll forget that ive read the whole thing. I like STUFF in it. but thats not enough for me anymore. If i had read it when i was younger tho, it might have been a diff story. idk. My most unpopular opinion of all is that... I hated Dungeon Meshi.. Sure its ..pretty! cute designs. but i found it SO painfully boring and it actually was a struggle to finish. in the end, it felt like a waste of time.. SHOCKING take i know. That is the darling of everyones heart and i like, understand WHY its popular. .. but for me, i was not fed by anything. i am unfed and starved and going to eat elsewhere oh, and i.. as a person who has read a lot of fighting mangas.. I have tried to read chainsaw man, but i dont know if I can. I did finish Fire Punch. I'm surprised to say: i kinda liked it but it took a long time to force myself to read thru it. I honestly hated many aspects of Fujimoto's storytelling/character acting that i didn't think my opinion on it would change, but I'm a little more open to it now. I dont think i could ever super be into it or whatever, but i did find genuine enjoyment in aspects of fire punch. I did not really like look back. I haven't read his other one shot(s)? Where am i going with all this..I guess im giving some unrequested reviews after all...oops... a lot of this is spurred by how houseki no kuni is one of my most fav series, not only visually/characters/story/ect.. but i cant lie.... the ending... was kind of a flop for me... gorgeous and poetic ig sure but.. AUGH! it isnt what i wanted. maybe it'll be one of those "it'll grow on me" endings but thats mostly me having to go thru the 5 stages of personal grief and gaslight myself into it, but as the like actual honest first-reaction feeling it kinda lost me. I think it did not work when i felt the confrontation btwn phos/cinnabar wasn't the one i wanted to see. i will say tho, while im dissapointed, its not like a DEEP one or anything. I know its a miracle to even get to an ending.. i guess my take away feeling from it was like "everything fit together too well, too planned" but didnt feel planned, emotionally. I wasn't sold on it. Anyway, im here to speak my truth and my hot takes which, i honestly dont even want to have that one about HnK but its the real feeling i have for it.. Once again Utena's ending just has made all these other issues i have with various stories more obvious LOL

[beautifulpersonpeach]

BPP, am really really interested to read your thoughts on Seven!

*

Ask 2: Hey bpp, can i be honest?? Ive been checked out of the fandom but still keep track of any music releases. So i didnt know abt any rumors abt 7. Imagine me being kind of disappointed that it’s another english song from jk when i watched the mv😅 it feels like his most promoted songs since last year has been all eng song… idk i wanted & expted something diff… i didnt like l&r, dreamers and now 7… it’s back to back lol. Tbf i didnt like My You too and thats in korean. At least not enough to listen!again after the first listen.

Im happy that still with you is finally on spotify tho. I’ll still be waiting excited for his album whenever it comes out. Hopefully ill find something i like in it!!

**

[BPP Note: Both asks above were sent before my "I don't like it..." post. The asks posted below were sent afterwards.]

**

Ask 3:

Same here

All the hype didn't matched with the song

1. rest members songs had so much depth and substance to it while this was the cliche boy chasing a girl song. Like we always dont need deep songs but the quality could be so much better. This was like just another pop song.

I think I'll put this on same level as BAD DECISIONS. But for bad decisions, atleast the chorus was staying on my mind while for this nothing was catchy enough for us to humm. Just because it's JK it will get hype but otherwise it's so generic. I think I liked LEFT and RIGHT way better than Seven. Even the rap portion felt so unnecessary and boring.

2. MV was kinda nice because of the production but concept was too shallow, the stalking and chasing was so outdated. In my country we have like 9293928843837 MVs in this same concept that not many make the same theme songs again.

3. The choreography. We haven't seen the full version. But for tiktok they do the highlight portions if that's so mediocre idk how rest will be. It was again giving the same mediocre showing off choreography and for me backdancers ruined it with their awkward moves.

4. they wanted this song to be played everywhere around the world. But there was nothing catchy enough to attract gp or go viral on tiktok, even if we sped it up. The only way to make everyone listen is to shove it down their throat but doing payola. But idk if investing in payola is worthy for the song. I also doubt the longietivity, as for me it was boring after 2 listens. I'll rather listen Like Crazy or wildflower or closer 20 times than listening this once.

5. I HOPE he'll bring something fresh to the table for his album and don't involve this mediocre producers who uses the same formula and same superstar persona to make a song successful. He is so much talented to sing a song which is so rich in melody and lyrics. And he can produce way better songs by himself.

Prolly a 4/10 for me

*

Ask 4: troye sivan's rush (which also came out last night) is exactly what I wish Seven was. I don't mean that in a 'I expect the things JK to make to be gay' way just in the way it's a fun, very danceable, sexy summer song that doesn't pull its punches. Something about seven feels too run through a commercial sanitizer a few times, even with the explicit lyrics.

***

Hi Anon(s),

Jungkook likes to fuck.

Rather, Andrew Watt likes to fuck and thinks Jungkook can relate.

JK has been talking about wanting to show more mature and explicit sides of himself for a good long while now. So I’m glad he’s finally gotten to do that, confirming for us why he keeps getting noise complaints from his neighbours since the mattresses all over his apartment don't help.

BTS has made songs explicitly referring to sex before (though it's been mostly the rapline doing so). So it's nothing new but I guess it's cool JK gets to share with us that he too has sex.

The question I posed to my friends immediately after watching the MV is, “Do you know who's been doing A&R for BigHit since 2020? I really need to know who is doing A&R for BigHit in America because they’ve been doing an appalling job lately. I'm starting to wonder if it's an inside job cause this song is kinda ass.”

That was me ~11 hours ago.

I didn’t like the song.

I’ve streamed Seven about 20 times since then I think, took a break from the song for a few hours, watched his GMA performance, caught a few minutes of the Wlive, then listened to it again just before writing this post and…

I still don’t like it.

Jungkook did a good job on the song, Latto's verse wasn't terrible, and while the song itself isn’t bad… the song isn’t good either.

It’s painfully, and at this point it’s a pattern so I have to add, predictably, mediocre.

Reserving judgement for the album, but Anons, I agree with you for the most part. The suits at BigHit are trying but they are woefully out of touch with the reasons BTS blew up in the West in the first place. I don't even feel like spending any energy doing a review or even trying to explain what I mean. So I'll just ramble on for a bit but try to keep it brief.

---

I have to give BigHit some credit because I can see what they're going for here. Andrew Watt is a very celebrated producer in the US, he won the Grammy award for Producer of the Year in 2021, he's got A listers in his portfolio. So, he's not a cheap name to book and I can see why the suits at BigHit thought he's the genius to gift them a song clinically designed for American radio.

But that pandejo phoned it in. There isn't a lick of creativity to be found anywhere in all 3 minutes and five seconds.

It reminds me of VIBE by Jimin and Taeyang, as the closest analog to the vague dissatisfaction morphing into annoyance and then pragmatic rationalization I experienced in that same sequence when listening to it the first few times.

The song is disappointing because we've all heard it before. Too many times, and we're bored of it. We've heard JK sing this sort of song for years, as covers mostly. So on one hand, while I guess it's nice JK gets to have an American summer JB-reject pop tune of his own, it's not good enough to be the track that introduces him to the world as a solo artist.

It's fine for any white, blonde, blue-eyed heartthrob that can ride on a pretty face and implicit bias to rack up accolades, it's not good enough for Jungkook.

And BigHit needs to start using whatever leverage a US$10.6 billion market capitalization buys you in Hollywood, to insist for songs that are at least as good as the songs made by BTS members and produced by their in-house team. It's a waste of money and everybody's time to fly a battalion to LA just to record 2014's summer hit in 2023.

In my opinion.

Still With You > Stay Alive > My Time > Stay > Left & Right > My You > Dreamers > Seven

*

All that said, I can't ignore JK has a taste for songs like this, and it's not his fault the song is shit (he didn't write, compose or produce it), so technically he shouldn't be punished for it. And the song is made for radio, while it's not my personal taste a lot of people really like the song (one of my friends likes Seven the most out of all the BTS releases so far), and it will catch on with some support. So, ARMY will support it including me, just to a lesser degree than I've done so far. Fingers crossed JJK1 has something solid on it.

[slickchickchocolatier]

Im very curious on what your thots are when it comes to the boys being doms or subs. Ive seen so many times that you post things and then later on we find out similiar happenings with the members like the Sunghoon ice skating post and the Heelel throne chair photo. I want to know what you think. All of the members minus Nikki Please.

This is what I truly think for each member, taking in my own observations from their habits on lives, their personality, their horoscopes/tarot readings (my own tarot readings since i've studied tarot and astrology since gradeschool) and what I know about Korean culture.

Please note, that everything i'm writing is purely just my own personal thoughts on how i perceive the members. i dont know them or any korean men other than some friends i grew up with. this is just all for fun and gossip (it really is) and again, just my own thoughts on how I think they would be like. i do not claim that this is in fact how the enhypen members are by any means. this is purely just my own gut instinct of how i think the boys are like offscreen.

So if I am being quite honest, i personally think that (when paired with their partners) all the boys will be dominant in some form of fashion. There may be different/various degrees on their dominance, depending on each member, but typically, Asian men (even the younger generation) will be somewhat dominant. This ofc does not apply to all of them, there are some Asian men who will be little to extremely submissive, but given the fact that the members of Enhypen are all employed, have fame, are financially stabled (if they're smart and not careless with their money) and have alot of opportunities to expand their networking and career goals, I'd say that all of them will be dominant. Perhaps, depending on the situation or event, they might elude some submissive behaviors, like for instance, if you both are chilling out and watching tv, and if you wanted to watch some particular show or movie, they might be like "fine, watch whatever you want." but when it comes to other things, I feel like they're going to call the shots. I'll explain this below (not in any particular order.)

Lets start with Jay...

So Jay was partially raised in America, is an only child (and is a son, which is a pretty big deal) i point this out because, more than likely, he has been groomed and treated to take a lot of pride and carry out the family name and legacy. Most likely, he's been reminded to always put forth his best effort, work hard, and to do his family name proud, which means he'll be very selective and when it is time to settle down, it will be with a very nice woman who can cook, clean, is educated, and comes from a good family. Career isn't really going to be a big deal to him (i feel like), because more than likely, he'll prefer someone to support him by taking care of the house and everything else while he's working and away. I can see him to be the type to put his foot down on the big things (again, the little stuff he wont care about, i do see him as somewhat easy going and a very gentle type) but when it comes to big stuff or...the intimate things, I see him being very dominant. Not demeaning or anything like that, just assertive and firm. i also see him being the type to be very loyal and dependable with his partner.

Sunghoon:

So, I know alot of fics that I stumble across always depicts Sunghoon as a very sex craved, demeaning and humiliating dominant, like a sex-god type (kind of how like Heethan is) and i know they are just fics (even though there are alot of readers and creators that really do believe him to be as such because of his image/visual) but honestly, i don't think he is like that at all. I think Sunghoon is very shy, timid, and might be a little stand-offish (not in a mean way) i just see him as very anti-social unless he gets to know you. I think with females, i can see him being attracted to ones that are the typical stereotype of korean beauty and of korean heritage (which really is only obtained by surgical alteration/enhancement, for the most part) the whole v-line jawline, big eyes, pale skin, heart shaped lips, and a very calm and well mannered personality. a woman who doesn't curse or has a very bold attitude. I say this, because he would be dominant that likes comfort and little to no-chaos. he wants things to be easy, and like Jay, he'll call the shots on the big stuff, but also on the little things. He might have the last say when it comes to things like what to eat for dinner, what to watch before bedtime, etc. I just see him as a very particular fellow who will put his foot down, again, in a non-demeaning way, just firm and MIGHT (might) remind his partner of their position in the relationship cordially or firmly, depending on the situation. He's a very calm dom.

Heeseung:

Again, alot of fics (mine included....*ahemheethanandheelelahem*) depict Heeseung as a sex craved pervert. Actually, there are alot of content that will post about idol HS as a perverted loser that is either dominant or submissive, and is openly filthy, but in reality, I would say that HS is like Jay and Sunghoon combined. I do personally think (and this is not because of his stage presence, these idols are trained to reflect various sides to fit the image and visual of the band's concept, per company's creative direction) but i do get this vibe that HS, when paired with a partner, is the type that does enjoy intimacy and pillow talk. I personally think that at some point while early in his career, maybe like a year or so after they debuted, I think that he may have had small relations and dated some girls here and there, and experienced intimacy. so with that being said, i feel like he's always been somewhat dom but it has grown a bit more since he debuted and i can totally see him being the type that will be chilled out for the most part, maybe some days he'll have the last say on small things like what to eat, what music to listen to while driving the car, but for the most part would be somewhat quiet, pensive, non-chalant even, and easy going. I see him as the type to keep to himself quite a bit, and depending on his mood. for instance, if you were to sit on his lap or something, i could see him either embracing you or he could sit you next to him and say "sit right here next to me." I get this vibe that he can be big on personal space, not all the time, just some of the time (out of all the members he's the only one that gives off this vibe) and when it comes to the big, impacting decisions, he's just like the other two. very dominant and will call the shots. when it comes to the bedroom, i can see him being the type that regardless, whether you take the lead or not, he'll still be reflecting a certain level of dominance, like telling you to slow down, or go faster, or "take this off" or "put this on" type.

Jake:

Now Jake is one of those members that is notorious for being a sweetheart. and I do think he is a very affectionate and rational type, probably the most open minded out of all the members. I think he would be the sweetest out of all of them to be partnered with, like i can see the other three ahead of him having a certain amount of boundaries, but when it comes to Jake, i feel like he would always be down to cuddle and welcome you with open arms, and might even be the touchy feely type. once you guys established a sound relationship, he'll be bold and less shy, and a bit more assertive even. I think he'd let you have free reign on alot of things, but would be the type to voice his opinion. for instance, he'd be the type to say "this movie again? can't we watch something else?"

again, I think that when it comes to the big decisions, he'll make the final decision, but i feel like he'd be more considerate about his approach. for some reason, with the others, i see them to be far more assertive but with jake, i can see him to be the type to do the whole "look, lets talk about this..." and he'll discuss and even hear you out, but it's really not going to matter because i feel like he'll make the final say. but it's not with ill intentions; like the others before him, i can see him to make the final decision because he's taking alot of major components into consideration that will benefit your guys life. if he gets angry or a bit irritated, i can see him being less considerate and just more "my way or the highway" type. This goes for intimate stuff too.

Jungwon:

Jungwon is young (he's like the same age as me) BUT, this guy does have a sense of confidence he eludes all the time and i feel like sometimes he can be a little cocky (not that he's shown that, i can just see it though) its like a gut instinct, not in a bad way though. I feel like that he'll be more of a playful dom, like if you try to voice out something and he doesn't agree with it, he'll just smile and pinch your cheek and say "cute." its not necessarily demeaning but its a little bit degrading as i can see him being the type to not really take you too seriously, unless you're older than him (i can personally see all the boys to not really care about age, so long as the person fits their ideal appearance and personality.) I remember Jungwon once said he respects and admires IU, the way his face and eyes looked when he said that, i get this feeling that if he was dating a girl that was older, someone who is mature, has some life experience and knows how to take care of him and all responsibilities, i feel like he'd still be dominant but would be very considerate and would take whatever you have to say to heart. he would just respond with the "i understand what you're saying, but we have to do it this way." and thats how he would have the final say. Now with a girl that is younger than him, i feel like he'd be very playful, like a carefree heart and would act very similar the way he does with the fansign's. cheek poking, laughing, giggling, the type that if you get shy and turn your face, he'd put his face right in front to enforce the eye contact. he'd have the final say through smiles and flattery.

Last but not least (since i'm excluding Niki) is Sunoo.

Sunoo:

I think that Sunoo is very much like Jungwon, but not as cocky. Actually, of all the members, I feel like Jake and Sunoo are probably the most humble, truly do. I can see Sunoo being less attentive to looks and more focused on personality. With that being said, i can see him to have the final say on things but it would be through harmless debates or small minor arguments, nothing too serious. I feel like he would be the dom type that would be studious and while discussing it with you, he'd have some very valid points that would be like, eye-opening factors that you hadn't considered. I know he has the image of the cutesy and fox like, diva visual, but in all honesty, i can see Sunoo being the ultra serious and sincere type. I dont know what it is, i feel like that he is not at all like the image he portrays himself, ofc that goes for all the boys, but unlike Sunoo, i feel like the boys stage presence and idol image has some essence of their true personalities. with Sunoo, i feel like he is actually a very smart, and solid person to discuss serious matters with. i can see him still being cute and silly, playful and maybe even emotionally sensitive, but there definitely is a side of him that we don't see and probably never will. i feel like he is a very rational type that will present factors that will influence you to sway his way, and that's the type of dom i think he is. when it comes to pillowtalk, i can see him maybe being a little assertive, but also, i feel like he and jake are the two that can be chilled out during the intimate moments and not as strong dom as their counterparts.

[naartjie-hijabi]

Most of the judges in the Hague court are probably pro israel. I think even after the evidence provided by South Africa there is little chance for them to win the case. I heard that Saudi joining South Africa at the last moment somehow proves that they arnt gonna win. But iv been thinking abt this a lot and Israel can easily win but what if they let South Africa win just so that the people around the world celebrate and take it as the 1st step toward victory, what of they do it just to make people back off a bit. Israel has tried this b4 too with the "ceasefire" as well. Israel wudnt have agreed to come and fight this case so easily if either they cud win easily or have some hidden motives. Also I'v read that the icj do not posess the complete power to force Israel to do anything they dont want to so it doesnt matter who wins, i hope i'm wrong

I hope that if we win, the world doesnt take a step back but keeps pushing until Palestine is free, but if we lose, that just goes to show how the "justice system" doesnt care aboutl justice at all, hopefully forcing people to take more action and continuing to pressure them until they break, and Palestine is free

Yeah, I get what you're saying. Many people don't even hope that South Africa will win because the reality is that Israel has better backing.

To be honest, I don't think Israel is letting SA win at all. Our lawyers came with a complete argument that left little room for any childish refutes and we addressed almost everything that Israel could have used as a defence. I think that they simply underestimated us.

I don't know much about international law or the ICJ in gneral, so I'll the actual students of law handle that area. Of course I don't think Israel will just admit defeat after being allowed to virtually anything they've wanted for 3/4 of a century.

Regardless of the outcome, we can't sit back and relax. If we win, we continue to make noise and if we lose, we continue to make noise. The goal is Palestine's complete liberation and freedom, not just a ceasefire.

[necroromantics]

Also gonna make things clear cuz I've just been listening to my gf and not engaging but seriously man this is insane.

I'm not a Nazi, in the full screenshots which they cropped out, I said I had another server with absolutely no rules (besides dont be a pedo), and I was saying that in that server, everything was allowed. You people need to understand that not being able to care about something does NOT mean you support it. Its not black or white

I have NEVER said anything or made jokes regarding rape/sa, that is actually one of the things (including pedophilia) that I am very morally against. I have not spent so much of my time helping my friends report their rapists, helping vulnerable people get out of extortion online, and being there for the people in my life who have experienced that just for some randos online to lie to people about me.

The most I have made is your mom jokes and necro jokes, which I personally don't consider morally wrong, and if they are, then I'll work on it, but I don't have the same understanding of things like that. I never learned where the line is like most people have, and thats why Im dedicated to learning it in adulthood

And do not make drug use a moral issue. My "morality" about drug use is completely nonexistent because I grew up in that. I have spent many years heavily involved with drugs, I know exactly what its like, and nothing about drugs is a moral issue.

And here again the same issue of straight up fucking ableism bro. Don't try to shame me for not having conventional morals when you know damn well I, and many other people, struggle with conditions that impact that (ASPD). Hearing about the ableism towards people like me from these guys isn't surprising in the slightest

I'm not gonna say I didn't say those things, cuz like I said, I said those things, I made those jokes, and I've said worse. The difference now is that those things were said more than a year ago. It's insane how you act high and mighty and then judge me on things I said that long ago to friends who made the same jokes and encouraged that kind of behaviour (none of which I talk to anymore, for the exact reason that they encouraged my bad behaviour).

I said what I said, I know it was wrong, I take full accountability. I have spent my time since doing my best to be more than that. I have spent a lot of my time trying to adjust to moral and social norms, even when it gets really difficult and I have to deal with people like this who wont give me space to grow and change for the better.

I have amazing friends and mutuals and people in my life who support me because they know how hard I try. My girlfriend even is a fucking hardass and would NOT have put up with any of my shit if she didn't see how hard I try. I've spent a lot of time with people who are like how I was, people who have done and said much worse things than me, and I understand how uncomfortable and jarring it is. Thats exactly why I'm so passionate about being more than that. And thats why this situation bothers me so much.

You all talk about me and how I mention my disorder as if you're not just shitting on stuff that is directly tied into having ASPD. And to hear that you have a history of that stuff? Im not crazy to say theres a lot of ableism going on here. I will always be open and honest about the person I have been, but I want it to be used as a reference point for how much I've grown and changed since then.

I will always be an advocate for people like me. I will always give support and speak out for those who struggle with being treated like a bad person because of the things they say, not because of who they are. (And if you know anything about people, you know theres a huge difference)

You guys have been on me for MONTHS way after I blocked and went on with my life. In those months you've spent doing nothing but nitpicking everything single thing Ive ever done and constantly spreading negativity, I have been working on myself, and I hope that somewhere along the line, you guys have or will too

But anyways, I needed to get this out. I hope that this blows over and I can continue working on living a life full of joy and love and keeping the good people in my life. And despite everything, I hope that for all of you guys as well, I hope that you can find peace and some happiness where it counts

[eirian]

so im thinking up a few options for myself:

local art market. it happens every second saturday downtown which is a great frequency i think. however i dont know the type of people attending so i dont know if my merch will sell well or at all, and i dont know if they even allow the type of stuff i sell. so this is an iffy one

finding book authors who need illustrations done. i can def do a childrens book illustration if i needed to but id like to find something within my current art style if possible. i'll have to look around and try and find places where ppl are looking for my type of work

sell at conventions. this one's a little tricky bc 1) i have to invest in my stock which is at LEAST $300 for everything i need, 2) im not guaranteed to get on the list of vendors, and 3) these happen very infrequently and i dont know if i can rely on this for steady income

self publish comics. i had thought of this before and i dont think im Currently fit for doing it bc i tend to burn out soooo easily (thats likely a problem with my workflow honestly. its fixable surely) but im hopefully about to get adderall prescribed to me so maybe it'll work out after all lol. unfortunately this isnt an overnight project either though, and i do need to make money Right Now

get into making either live2d vtuber models or 3d models for both vrchat and/or vtubers. i know i know, i cant charge 8k for my first models, but i can at least make a few hundred on a single model. this would be a new skill to learn but its totally possible. theres tutorials and i also vaguely know how to use blender so i can at least try this. i do have fun doing this stuff anyway. im just a lil worried about the level of detail that goes into live2d models, im not super used to detailed designs just yet but its something ive been wanting to put more time and work into, so..

bite the bullet and start putting more work into social media presence and advertising my commissions. i complain about how rough commission work is all the time yes. but genuinely i do enjoy doing commissions for a living. the ONLY reason i complain is because of the inconsistent/low income, and the only reason for That is because i dont have a huge following to the point of where my slots sell out regularly. im no sakimichan. but if i just put in a little more time and work into building a social media presence im sure things will look up in that regard. i just have to fuckin..do it

so ya. these all have pros and cons and im weighing them desperately LOL. if im being honest? im leaning towards three in particular: the vtuber models, building a better social media presence to up my commission demand, and selling at conventions. i can definitely do all three of course, but i have to figure out how to balance everything while learning to do the new things and get good at them. i have no idea how to wrangle social media. ive tried so many things and i keep falling out of it so so easily, its very hard. but fuck dude if 15 year olds on youtube can have 100k subscribers then what the hell am i doing LOL yknow?

[cpunkwitch]

answering my own questions

[pt: answering my own questions]

dont really get sent anything and not many people sent in the questions when the games were posted and reblogged, and i wanted to talk about stuff, so here we are.

this might end up being a multiple part post series?

ask game one (link)

(if comfortable) tell us about your condition? as much info as youre comfy with sharing.

i have a defect in the base of my spine, since i was born its caused me chronic pain all throughout my development and in recent years its only gotten worse, twisting my spine, headaches, jaw issues etc. i've also got highly suspected rheumatoid arthritis, fibromyalgia and ive been diagnosed with a pretty bad case of anemia so bad that everytime a doctor looks at my results after bloodwork they give me a pained look and say "heyy...did you know your iron is low? like...really really low?". that and a hand full of other things, vitamin deficiencies, etc. i dont mind talking more about this

2. do you know about the spoon theory? if yes, what do you think of it?

i'll be honest, the majority of my knowledge of spoon theory off the top of my head is that "drawer with limited supply of spoons" is the disabled way of saying i only have so much motivation and energy (phys, as "battery" usually refers to social and emotional) in me. i've read up on it ages ago but would not be able to put into better words what i still remember about spoon theory (esp since we had a different host back then), i like that its just so much quicker and easier to convey my amount of ability to do things for the day by saying whether or not i have the spoons for it.

i do like to joke that my drawer is always stocked with knives and forks for the ablests, but sometimes that requires spoons to handle too. /silly

3. do you have mobility aids? if yes, which ones? if no, do you want any in the future?

i've mention how i really wish i could have a wheelchair if i were in a different situation, i dont know if i'll ever get one and i almost cried when my brother responded to my joke of "would you make on for me?" with an "i would if i could", i really would like a wheelchair of some kind in the future if the world were more accessible and i were in a safer place. right now though, i've just got my cane that still needs repainting. i guess my moms back brace counts too, i take it with me to work sometimes.

4. how did you find out about cripplepunk? what drew you to the community and movement?

i dont exactly remember but i've known about it for years. i (prev host) might have come across it looking up different punk aesthetics, though im not completely sure why it showed up in a punk aesthetic list, possibly because its punk and people misinterpreted it? my first glimpse was seeing patches on jackets, spiked customized aids, cripples/phys disabled people in your classic punk attire (piercings, dyed spiked mohawks, ripped jeans and fingerless gloves) and i loved it. im a sucker for self expression through appearance and customizing things and then when i found out it was a whole community for support and centered around being physically disabled in general and slowly came to terms with my own disabled body and started accepting myself, i kinda fell in love with cripplepunk in the "this feels like home" sense.

i could probably ramble way more but i'll stop there.

5. if you deal with any kind of pain, what's your method of pain management?

i use hot packs, ice packs, voltaren cream, sometimes i take a cbd gummy, i do little stretches when i remember them, i take walks and hot baths/showers, im trying to go back to the chiropractor and my favourite instructors in rehab (theyre trans friendly and complimented my cane when i first came in with it i love them so much), and i take whatever meds i can, normally anti-inflammatory like ibuprofen but because i cant swallow pills i either take liquid (yeah, childs liquid meds works, the couple hours of mild relief is still worth it) or powdered tylenol or something. the hot/cold stuff depends on the pain and where on my body the pain is.

6. do you stand or sit in the shower or do you prefer baths/find bathing easier rather than showers?

i take baths for my muscles and during the damn monthly ouch in order to relax my body. i take showers just for my shoulders and when im feeling icky and wanna rinse off or something, i take showers on a "regular" basis and i normally stand because the only way i sit is if im crouched in the tub and if i do that i get extra dizzy standing up to get out when i turn the water off. thankfully im no longer near passing out when i take a shower but i still have to sit on the floor matt after because my legs demand rest. i gotta be careful with hot water cuz not only will it make me overheat quickly (i will not realize if in standing in blood-boiling hot water and turning myself into a cooked lobster until after im out) but it can also cause me to literally fall asleep in the bath which can go wrong.

7. do you have a sort of comfort item or safety blanket that helps you feel better, especially on the worst days?

a couple things. a few of them are stuffies/plushies, or music, games or books to help me keep my mind off it i suppose.

8. name 3 things you hate about hospitals/doctors/nurses/the medical system

a) a lot of them refuse to take people seriously or actually listen. sure maybe theyre tired or heard the same shtick before and wanna make sure this person isnt just a drug user trying to pity their way into getting more, but even then all matters a patient presents them with should still be taken seriously and never brushed off or mocked.

b) the fact that the er, the place you take a ticket and wait, is called the Emergency Room, when its normally scheduled appointments and people taken in by the ambulance that are top priority. sure its called the er because most visits through the er are rushed "emergency" last minute visits, people going there because they couldnt schedule an appointment and needed to see someone on that day, but still it feels wrong to call it the emergency room when its really just a waiting room and regardless of the visit they arent actually treated as emergencies. the whole system of just going to see a doctor feels messed up and most of the time you end up just going to see a nurse, get a check up and leave when they tell you what they got after a talk and examination or they schedule to see you again when a doctor is available. because of this i tend to prefer walk in clinics.

c) the fact that they charge to damn much, no matter if youre insured, it still charges so much. no matter what they do. and yeah, healthcare in canada is free to an extent if youre insured but a lot of times they charge more than your insurance can cover and not everyone can get/has insurance. not to mention the medical debt so many people have in america. i get that staff and hospitals need pay and funding but the government should have that covered and not have the patients charged so much for getting help. i almost got charged over 3k just for my short visit to the ward because there was an issue with my insurance and thats a whole angry story for another time.

9. whats an accessibility tool you wish was more accessible/that you had access to?

one of them is aac, the one i have on my phone i have to disconnect my phone to and has a limited amount of phrases i can pick from. id like it better if the app or just aac programs in general when directly to your device speaker by default, had more options for more ease conversing and none of them were behind a damn pay wall, in-app purchase or otherwise. i rarely use it for several reasons but i'd love if i could use it more with less limitations.

also wheelchair ramps. i dont have a wheelchair ramp but i wish people stopped walking on them when theyre clearly able-bodied, i wished my parents taught me and my siblings what the ramps were for and not to run up and down them as well as other parents to their kids because those things are supposed to be clear for a wheelchair user. i also think the corners should be rounded for ease of turning and that wheelchair accessible paths in general should be firm to the ground (not a wimpy matt on the sand that flips over and gets buried on the beach unmaintained), maintained and cleaned regularly, not have any gaps (ive seen so many of the small ones installed in doorways that have a height gap above the ground which causes trouble getting the wheelchair on the ramp let alone through the damn door) and not have railings made of metal if theyre outside (they can often reflect light into peoples eyes and get too hot to touch in the sun both of which are not good issues to have no matter how small they seem.)

those are at least the first to come to mind.

10. whats the worst accessability cockblock you've seen ableds do/make?

theres quite a few i've seen but atm nothing significant comes to mind other than overpricing mobility aids or placing paywalls in front of aids in general.

however there was the few times in more than one school i went to you had to go to the office, provide a 'valid' reason and ask them for a key to the elevator, otherwise they make you take the stairs. i know they do it because they dont want able-bodied kids messing with it n shit but its stupid, it should be accessible to everyone regardless. thank fuck both collages ive been to so far give free elevator use to any staff or student but in the schools i went to i was only allowed have the access key because i couldnt walk up the steps on my sprained/twisted ankle and i had to give it back at the end of every day. the last school even limited my use to just the morning or 1-2 periods that i had on the second floor. nevermind if my locker was up there.

11. whats an accessibility tool youre very thankful for?

screen readers. my little brother uses/used em more than me and i dont use them too often but im glad they exist in general i used them when i was younger and my english teachers gave us work on the computer, i used it like an audiobook and it helped me majorly. i hate that people dont always provide translations to things and make things harder on screen readers by using coloured, tiny, non-serif font-ed or 'quirked' text but ever since i was a kid i was just as happy they existed as i was about braille.

12. name 3 things you like about hospitals/docs/nurses/the medical system

a) that there are some people there who are actually hoping, willing and ready to listen and help others.

b) that they provide things for kids like toys in the waiting room, people who specialize in caring for kids in the hospital, some doctors even have their office decorated. one doctor i went to had her entire office winnie the pooh themed and it helped me out a lot when i got blood work done n stuff, it was really comforting to stare at pooh bear instead of the sharp pokey in my arm.

c) that things are usually kept quiet with low voices, as it reduces risk of overstimulation as well as avoids hurting anyones head and protects privacy of those talking about whats going on. voices are usually only raised to a normal talking level when in the privacy of a nurse or doctor office and its something i dont see really acknowledged anywhere.

13. do you have any favourite disability rep? (media or character)

not picking from my own sources, when it comes to physical disability rep, its hard for me to pick something that involves a realistic character because most of them arent very well portrayed or i cant personally relate to. i can list Freddy freeman as one, hes a crutch user and how the shazam movie portrayed him does well in expressing what ableism can be like for some visibly disabled kids in school. i could probably list some shows that handle disability well through other means if i thought of them, i know theres a few that handle it through super heros being disabled (the one spider-person who's got both a wheelchair and a cane from the recent spiderverse movie for example) or non-human characters having differences that are implied to be disabilities, and i adore that creativity, especially with showing disabled super heros as it tells disabled kids theyre still strong, not broken, they can still be cool and do great things just like able-bodied people. hard for me to name specific things off the top of my head though, guess i like specific tropes around disability rep more than anything. it helps normalize disability and thats what really makes me happy with it. (thats a big reason why i made @/your-fave-is-crippled)

14. least favourite/worst disability rep?

not phys disabled but sia's fucked up movie right off the bat still angers me. i cant name any specifics once again, normally if theres some rep that i dont like i purposely forget they exist to begin with, they arent worth remembering if they arent gonna do it right, y'know? id rather forget and move on than linger and rage about it if i can help it.

15. list some creators (youtubers/bloggers etc) that are disabled and/or cater to a disabled audience that you enjoy? (if any)

@crippled-pvp, @cripple-culture-is are a couple blogs i follow that i enjoy seeing on my dash (sorry if you dont want to be tagged!)

there was a deaf/hoh girl i used to frequent the content of as she talks a lot about signing and i really enjoyed her videos, shes such a sweet person but i never remembered her name nor any of the other creators i watched/followed. no one else comes to mind atm

16. favourite aspect about the general disabled community?

i like that there are people with advice at the ready, whatever question you have or info you need etc, theres always going to be someone with the words you need. i just like how helpful people can be in general in this community and how easily support is accessed through the community.

17. least favourite aspect about the general disabled community?

the fact that theres in-fighting, fake claiming, judgment, quick assumptions, and general internalized ableism still going on when we're supposed to be a community helping each other out not tearing each other down. im not just talking about the fight over "inclusion vs exclusion" on cripplepunk and other sub/separate communities in the disability community.

18. favourite aspect about cripplepunk?

i think my answer to "what drew you to cripplepunk" also answers this.

19. least favourite aspect about cripplepunk?

honestly? none. i hate the people forcing themselves into a space not meant to include them nor benefits them in the first place. i cant actually think of an issue i have with the cpunk community, only issues with people outside being upset over how "exclusive" it is because they want in.

20. free space:

feel free to ask me about any of my answers! i'll make a second post for the second ask game some other time. its currently 11pm and i have to get up early for morning classes yuck

[ID: banner reading "dni if... proship, transx/id, syscourse/discourse blog, anti-mspec lesbians/gays, anti-lesboy/turigirl more in pinned rentry. this blog is protected by the addams family, the de rolo family and co." in all black lowercase text. It has a grey cloud background. On the left is the De Rolo coat of arms with a cobweb in the top corner and symmetrically flipped on the right is the symbol of Vox Machina with the same cobweb in the bottom corner :End ID]

[pangyham]

sorry to anyone who has to see this HAHAHA i think it's a little fun to ramble to.. a void i guess. i'm typing this under the assumption no one's gonna read it, let alone find it, so, sure, i'll talk!

on pangytine, my current and only instagram account, i sometimes get these spontaneous urges to post a huge a long overdue thank-you paragraph to my followers on my story. gratitude for indulging my artistic endeavors when i still had tangypine. i just never did it because.. well it's kinda.. cheesy... i had no idea how to deliver it in a way that didn't seem dramatic or "humble" because cmon, i'm not that relevant. It felt a bit weird addressing it because it just made it seem like i was this huge influencer who suddenly disappeared (and yes i know i was technically considered a big artist on both ig and twitter but.. it's not like i was unique; i think.. the state of Fandom and the art community these past few years makes accumulating thousands of followers a little less unattainable, and i was one of those artists. and my work is not phenomenal- i did not leave an impact on the art community. but these nuances will just have to be generalized for now because i think you all know what i mean) and so i couldn't help but laugh and cringe and think, "i am not this relevant-" because i really wasn't. why make a big deal out of it?

but i can't help it being a little dramatic though, because i still get emails from my followers asking where i am, and i get comments and messages on pangytine ("i finally found you!"), and i even get messages from my shop's contact form! a shop that i've abandoned for months! and my heart swells. I don't want to dismiss that; i think i will always be a sensitive, emotional person and so stuff like this just makes me overwhelmed. it's sweet, and it will never fail to make me a little bit nostalgic and thankful. I will always have a soft spot for tangypine and my time spent in the anime + genshin communities… i dunno.. people are just so kind and i'm thankful i've encountered a lot of them

i've been a lot less.. chronically online (LOL) that the thought of having 200k followers is completely foreign to me. i forget that i had a huge following, that people actually looked at my stuff. I dont mean for this to come across as modesty though because i'm just being honest, truly. but this just makes the occasional "where are you? i miss your art" hit a little harder 🥲 i mean, i was able to somehow sell my art through tangypine. i was able to do commissions.. had so many say they loved my art- of course a part of me misses that. i don't think i yearn for it, and knowing that makes me a little sad.

i genuinely am thankful for every kind comment people have left me, and every kind message. I think i'm just ultimately thankful i had a kind following. people are so nice! and that's what i wanted to say, that's all ive always wanted to say before i deleted my accounts. here it is

aha and again i dont really expect anyone to see this (except maybe a few handful just because my very first post here has a whopping 4 notes, me included, and that genuinely shocked me HAHAHA). perhaps i just find closure in publishing these particular thoughts somewhere, and here they are sorry this is cringe to the people who read it. my friend once told me i'm notorious for overexplaining. This is will be the only time i get to say this, so gah whatever. i don't think i can bring myself to post this lengthy ramble on my more public account on instagram

[pilotheather]

we're back

youre trying so fucking hard to set up this unit spin off. im going to be horribly honest with you: i dont really care, and i think this is such a corny way to do it. i think torchwood (the show) is something people see with rose-tinted glasses a lot of the time, but i do think its slower introduction to the characters, completely isolated to its own tv show, made more sense. i feel like this weird vibe of just setting up these big personalities who all neatly fit into the exact archetypes you'd Expect... i dont know. i dont care for any of them. i love big weird non human robot-adjacent entities and i dont even care. and that fucker has cable-like tentacles too. i should be sold.

i think its also cuz they are like so obviously these Scifi archetypes for shows like this which is fine but leading first with a quickfire round of rather than getting a softer introduction to them just sort ofmakes them feel like fake cartoons. i think thats sorta why ive never truly warmed to paternoster gang too.

like i think my issue - and im welcome to be proved wrong, whenever we do get this unit spinoff - is i feel like its leading with the idea of "i want a spinoff" first rather than an attempt to fill a specific niche or hole for stories. i feel like sja and torchwood were both very specifically shows that would be in the universe, but would cater to things that would not suit the proper show, and had their own cast driving it.

like i'll be honest i like kate but ummmm im not sure i like her enough to follow her into a spin off. LOL.

sorry thats my hater era over im 2 seconds in

oh no nevermind i also hate big budget takes itself too seriously bullshit wheres the losers

is rose still meant to be like 15. her in business casual for the day job at unit.

okay The Vlinx.

WHYS THERE A LITTLE BEEFCAKE SECURITY GUARD. IS HE LIKE YOUR LITTLE BOYTOY, UNIT? sorry hes not even my typ. harriets really cute though

sorery i still dgaf

rtd and his anagrams. christ.

ive been laughing all day about a reddit comment that said "rtd is a" and i cant stop laughing at it and i dont know anyone who will find that funny in my life so i cant even

WHY ARE THEY JUST FUCKING

SORRY THATS SO FUNNY THEY WERE LIKE LETS QUICKFIRE ADDRESS THE STUPID MYSTERY BOXES. SUSAN. TARDIS... S TRIAD.... SUSAN AGAIN.

i really fucking hope it isnt susan. people have said it before but i just feel like ive always liked the idea of jsut leaving her be. dont revisit it. its fine.

sorry help me why are they just pulling everything out help me

i feel like theyre trying to be too meta about it and not in like a clever way its just like a lets state the obvious to everyoneits that vclassic TELLING NO SHOWING that i feel like christ it keeps ... feeling like the writing is doing that so much

CAN ANYONE TALK ABOUT HOW NCUTI LOOKS IN THE LEATHER JACKET BTW?

soery its like not even 10 minutes in and im like already feeling like a hater i just i dont know i feel like so im fine with them cashing in on nostalgia and being a bit self aware in finales sometimes but i feel like this and then the trilogy last year... LOOK most dw finales and special eps of the nu era are kind of rooted in some sort of classic right its like dalek dalek cyberman master dalek lets go to gallifrey for this one but its like still at least one thing sorry im sick of it i dont wanna see mel any more i dont wanna be in unit CAN WE FOLLOW THE DOCTOR AND RUBY see them figuring it out PLEAAASEEE they can point out its obvious its fine but the fucking round table discussion

SORRY I KNOW ITS BEEN THE HOT TOPIC ITS LIKE THE WAY THIS SEASON HAS GONE TOO FAST CUZ ID SAY A LOT OF THE EPS WERE GOOD IN THE END BUT ITS LIKE SO MANY OF THEM WERE TOO HARD DEPARTURES FROM WHAT WE REALLY NEED WHICH IS JUST

TIME WITH RUBY AND THE DOCTOR . PLEASE.

nevermind i love mel on the moped

ugh ive been wanting a bike for so long but i keep hjearing about so many accidents i wanna kms in a controlled environment

my second thought btw: i think one of my favourite season finales will always be s4's. and yes that does also bank on this big, lets have ALL OF THESE PEOPLE COME TOGETHER!!! and have one huge crossover event even if the story isnt as good. but as ivealways said: that works because its earned through four seasons of building up all of those individual characters. it can stand on that legwork thats already been done. i just dgaf otherwise. its why, and maybe this is controversial, i can never give a shit about a good man goes to war. (although i also loathe that because that storyline does my fucking HEAD IN)

im also hating this so hard im not even far enough in sorry i just love to hateeeeeeeeeee

help e christ if it wasnt for reddit i would not fucking recognise anyones fucking face is hat the same woman i mean rby also isnt clocking her does she have some fucking perception filter on . missus flood what is up with you

missus flood what even is wrong with you

"why did you never go back to see her?"

because susan was lowkey annoying af

SORRY

SORRY WOMEN

i also do wanna know: if hes mentioned her face popping up a lot, are they not scanning their fucking databases for matches. like thats definitely technology they have. lets be so for real

AGAIN SORRY THE OTHE RTHING I HATE ABOUT IT IS THE TIME SINK IT IS GREAT LETS HAVE OUR INTRODUCTIONS AND HAPPY WOOPEEEES AND MEETING THE TEN BILLION FUCKING PEOPLE WE'RE BRINGING ALONG WHEN THEYRE REALLY NOT ENRICHING THE EPISODE AND ITS JUST WEARING EVERYTHING SO THIN DUDE COME ON OH WAIT HANG ON LETS INTERRUPT THE FLOW AGAIN TO BRING IN SOMEONE ELSE AND STOP IT!! EEEENOUGH!

(again with the way s4 finale was handled: i think it was really good the way they had everyone sort of... separated out? they had them all cleanly following their own plots. so it didnt make shit a fucking mess.)

caralas literally chill w can bring carla

Do you have a time window. Ten floors down. classic shit.

i think i also ironically did i say this bit already i fucking hate trying to do big... sci-fi organisations like this trying to fight the aliens or villains or whatever. sorry just a taste thing. like compare this to how torchwood was presented in s2. it just feels like we're thriving in it and im not a fan of them being our unapologeticbesties we swing around and giggle with. can we get some nasty fucking vibes in here please. i loved when capaldi was a cunt with them.

this is also why i refuse to ever engage with the avengers content

christmas eve 2004. god shesso young. (im 4 years older literally).

sorry i also hate mystery box companion bullshit fuck off can we not just get some cunt from the local

SORRY I JUST THINK RTD FINALES ARE SO BADLY CAMP SOMETIMES

i keep thinking about how she looks like jodie i think its the boots with the ankles sort of poking out

thats my bad aura sorry i was hating too hard

NOT THE BOYTOYS

THEYRE PICKING OFF THE BOYTOYS

theres that irony again of like they'll sit there and do a whle bit like haha duh ofc we know its an anagram DUHHH but then half the dialogue is just fucking . SAYING SHIT STRAIGHTFORWARD AND OUTRIGHT SHUT UP

hes in hell. god damn it. i hate it when i lose my boytoys and he ends up in hell

imagine if this was the beast from the satans pit

what a hilarious hater moment that would be

sorry now I- UMMMMM THE BOYTOY IS DUSTTT AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

colonel winston is making me giggle. lke the monkey. guys i dont know anything abou overwatch but that monkey makes me laugh

guys we're on susan watch

shes going to be the dumbest red herring ever isnt she amen shes just nothing please rtd you fuckerr- DOCTOR CALM DOWN

CAN WE GET HIM A FUCKING STIM TOY

CAN WE GET HIM A BLUEBERRY MATCHA

CAN WE GET HIM SOMETHING TO COPE WITH

so cool we brought an image of this thing up before and it wrecked our shit lets do it again hell yeah come on

harriet i need you

SHES NOT HER ITS SO FUNNY

EVERYU TIME SOME CRAZY BITCH NAMED SUSAN APPEARS DO YOU DO THIS.

BRO DOES THAT MEAN THESE GIRLIES WRE CONNECTED HELP ME IMAGINE IF THAT WAS SUSAN AND NOW SHES JUST STUCK WITH THE FUCKING MEMORIES OF RAISING LINDY. COME ON SUSAN. BREAK THE FUCKING TRAUMA CYCLE. YOU DIDNT NEED TO RAISE HER LIKE THAT MAN.

can we get the tardis a ginger ale

THAT FUCKING CAMERA ANGLE BEING A FAKEOUT FOR A FUCKING RUBY SUNDAY THIS WHOLE THING IS A TV SHOW SHTICK IS SO FUNNY ACTUALLY

SUSAN TRIAD DOING THIS IN AN EMPTY CROWD IS SO FUNNY

SUSAN TRIAD YOU HAVE TO GET IT TOGETHER GIRL THEY'LL BE CLIPPING BITS OF THIS ON TWITTER

the king innit

HARRIET ARBINGERRRRRR YESSSSSSS

SLAYYYYYYYY

NEVERMIND THAT BIT GOT ME A PRETTY WOMAN WILL GET ME SOOO EASY

TRICKSTER MENTION IS INSANE

her children doubt and dreaddddd so silly

WHOS THIS HATER

SUTEKH

THATS SO FUCKINGH FUNNY

HUNDREDS OF REDDITORSARE PUNCHING THE AIR. MAYBE EVEN TENS

I LOVE HOW IT LOOKS LIKE SHIT

SO WHAT IS WRONG WITH RUBY

HELP ME I SPENT SO LONG BEING A HATER I DONT KNOW SHIT ABOUT SUTEKH SORRY CLASSIC FANS

ANYWAYS

[beta-adjacent]

may i ask for any tips on how to incorporate a/b/o into my life, like nesting or scents? ive looked but i dont see any lists anywhere

Heck yeah you may, dude!!! :D I think it's hard for us to make lists/an official tip guide because everyone's different. What I’ve written below the cut is certainly more of a guided walkthrough of my experience, but I hope you can get something out of it!!

Scents:

I'll be honest, a lot of scent to me is a mind game, haha. I've found myself most connected when I'm walking past a group of people and smell someone else's perfume. They won't know it, but I'll take solace that they're like me-- we both just want to be smelly.

I don't have a "100% official, patent pending" scent, but I do have what I call a "ballpark of olfactory favorability". And really, I created my ballpark by paying attention to what smells I linger on, haha. Realistically, we wouldn't be able to smell ourselves in the omegaverse, but having a scent as a miscecanis is entirely for ourselves. So I don't like to think of my scent as "how others should/would/could perceive me" but rather "how I want myself to perceive me", or even better "what would I like to smell today?". Oftentimes, my own answer to that varies by day, hence my ballpark.

If you've forgotten what smells exist, Poesie and Demeter are two perfume brands I've been recommended. I haven't tried them myself, so I wouldn't be able to comment on their physical quality, but I still think they're worth looking at! Some of the scents I see in those catalogues I never would've thought of on my own.

More succinct suggestions:

If you're able, try to be actively aware of what you smell. When you have a quiet moment, take a deep breath. What do you smell? Is it good, bad, not much of anything? How does it impact you, if at all?

Think, experiment, and explore with the smells around you. What smells do you associate with being happy, sad, angry? What's something you want to smell? If you met your clone, how would you hope they smelled?

For most of us, we won't be able to smell like our scent. If you're able, surround yourself with what you love to smell, even if that doesn't feel like your scent. Sometimes being around what you love has to be enough.

Nests:

I struggle with nests all the time!!! I naturally, constantly crave them while also being extremely picky about them. Sometimes, all I can do is imagine what life will be like when I'm rich enough to build my six story mansion (and what the one floor dedicated to nests would be like), bwahahaha.

I am privileged to have materials that I find comforting and that elevate my nesting experiences. I'm even more privileged to have a space in my living situation that I can experiment with. It's hard to say "just try different things you like!" because many are unable to.

Some general principles in my mind when I nest:

Expand your idea of a nest. While yes, the classic sleeping structure like a bed is The known nesting base, it sometimes doesn’t feel like a nest at all. And it doesn’t have to be! Look for what feels like yours in your life. Maybe it’s your favorite spot on the couch, or your assigned seat in a classroom, or even your favorite oversized hoodie. The point is that it’s yours, even for just an hour, and that you’re allowed to own that space for as long as you have it (including personal space). This isn’t to say you should nest everywhere and be hyper-territorial; it’s to say that a nest is a place where you feel safe and at home and sometimes that’s not physically in your room

If and only if you can, obtain materials that bring you comfort. I'll be honest; the greatest thing I've ever gotten for a nest was leftover pieces of couch foam. I’m always worried I’ll die of dehydration so there’s almost always a emergency bottle of water near my nest. My friends used to have a system where we would trade plushies every night, and that brought us comfort. All of these things bring or once brought me comfort to my daily life, especially when I come home and need a space to decompress. These materials were not bought specifically for nesting and they certainly don’t have to be conventional.

Listen to your needs/wants and prepare for those to conflict/change. For a week, my brain goes “ooh, you should try sleeping under your bed tonight!” Which is crazy because I’ve tried sleeping under beds a thousand times before and it doesn’t go well. But one night I gave in and laid under my bed, and something in me was soothed. And I had to think about why this was working for me mentally but not physically. What I learned was that my brain really wanted distance from an immovable object in my room, and I was able to change my sleeping situation accordingly. Long story short, by humoring my impulses, I was able to learn where my different needs can compromise

If you’re looking more for the logistics of how to build a nest, there actually are quite a bit of nest inspiration and tutorials I’ve seen float around! I think there’s even a nesting tag but don’t quote me on that. I’ll check in my feed and reblog some stuff I’ve found intriguing before

I know a majority of this sounded rather “philosophically preachy”, for a lack of a better phrase. That’s just how the incorporation works in my life now. If there’s anything to take away, let it be this: there’s no “right” or “wrong” way to be miscecanis or partake in the lifestyle, if your heart is respectful and kind to both the community and to yourself. There is no rush, pressure, or limit to how this journey can manifest for you. Do what sounds fun and attainable; ideas are in just about every fic or blog you’ll find!

I sincerely hopes that this inspires you in your journey!!

[orchidyoonkook]

personal

Hi, need to scream. Tumblr seems to listen best. can and please feel free to ignore.

okay so essentially my job has removed all of the things I use and need in order to be able to do my job with my mental disorder. my mental DISABILTY. that i was honest with them and told them about at my freaking trial shift. that i told them i needed certain things in order to do well. nothing drastic. but things that helped me significantly with my performace.

SOOOOOOOOO i am now severely struggling at my job because they've taken those away cuz they were 'annoying' or 'in the way' or 'clutter'. like. im not even leaving shit every where. It's like, maybe at most 3 sticky notes? (for example) and they're written just for me, like just so i can have a list of things i can do and know to go back and look on when i need a task because ive finished the one i was doing. but then my boss reads them and critiques them as if they're for everyone. or says 'okay yeah but we do that every day so i dont see why you have to write it down. you should know to do it by now' LIKE BRO. I forget to put deodorant on some days because of said mental disability. it's something i do and have done every day since i was 12 or 13. thats 12 years. and i still forget some days just cuz my brain wasn't working properly.

AND now due to this they have put me, one of the staff currently with more seniority than 3 other staff, down to one shift a week, while every one else is full time or heavily part time.

In march i was full time and kicking ass, I was the fastest employee on my tasks, i was doing great, the customers loved me and now that all of my things that i need in order to function have been removed for everyone else's aesthetic preferences, I'm suffering, and most likely being silently fired.

like... what do i do with that. I can do my job, with my accomadations - that arent that many btw - i dont expect them to move mountains for me. But dude. I hate this feeling so much because i'm capable, theyve seen me be capable. i was for 1.5 years. like i want to be good at my job. I like and enjoy being good at my job. i've told them that. I want to do good but my ability to be good is being derailed, and i just get told to try harder, just work harder, impress your boss with how hard you work -> for minimum wage, i might add.

and everyone is like "just get a new job, just apply for more jobs you're not applying for enough, literally just apply for everything, even if youre not qualified" and i cant just do that, due to said disability. there are jobs i am unable to do. so i have to be a lil picky otherwise i'll be right back where i am now. and ive been looking for months and applying for months with no luck - no one ever responds. why list jobs if you dont respond?????

it's getting to the point where im debating opening up drawing commissions or writing commissions, or something that i can make to earn a little extra cash here and there while i get over this transition period. And that's a big deal for me because i don't do commissions. I do my art for myself or for when i want to share something i've made already, like the UTWT books. Hell, I did a tattoo design for a friend on here that i put easily 40 hours into, and i felt guilty that they wanted to pay me for it because i'd asked them for the idea. Like, i don't do commissions. so for me to be considering it is really telling for me.

anyways. this is a bajillion words long now, but i already feel better. and I'm posting it in the middle of the night in hopes that the void just consumes it and never lets it see the light of day.

If you read this, thanks and sorry for the bummer of a post. This isnt a pity party or a poor yoon thing. I'm not looking for comfort or any of that. this is a 'i don't have a therapist and my friends and partner and family are sick of hearing me bitch, when i havent been able to fix it in months despite trying my best too' thing. so yeah..

i hope the new year brings me something good.

[crguang]

I always go back to reread your fanfic about meeting Kafka on the beach, it gives me great calm.

It's me G.

Is everything okay here? Maybe I'll come back many times, who knows. I like the climate here.

My ideas might have been a little extreme, huh? Forgive me for the therapy... 😔

What have you been thinking lately?

At least I thought a lot, I'm an ideas factory. I loved your last post about Kafka, it makes me reflect more, I even wonder if cinema needs screenwriters like us?

I'm kidding, who knows. hehe

Good night or good afternoon, or maybe good morning?

See you next time.

hehehe i love your little visits. i’m glad that fic gives you some peace!! that’s really nice. i hope you do come back🫶🏾 i love your ideas though, they really make me think about who kafka is as a character and that’s always fun for me. i was pulling out sources like it was an academic essay 😭 what’s crazy is that im currently taking film classes to see if i could be a screenwriter or director so that’s a funny coincidence you would mention it.

as for what i’m thinking, mmm… i’ve been thinking a lot about being sandwiched between kafka and himeko if im honest😭😭😭 as soon as i figure out how that could work, it’s over. ive also been thinking about himeko in general and the direction i want the trailblazer!reader fic to go. that and maybe an angsty himeko fic abt being long distance, i dont know im kinda in a hime mood rn

see you <3

[velvetporcelain]

no thanks, i'll walk.

hello. it's me. again. I'm here and that says something, it means I want to say something but dont know what, and i need the creativity of writing mixed with the movement of thoughts to help soothe me.

I have my headphones on, which helps with the over stimulation. My mind is so crossed fired.

I think about everything all the time. everything. good thing I'm not an alcoholic, I think would start as a good drunk, living in the moment. But then I would turn into a bad drunk, living in yesterday.

I dont like living in the past. I wake up everyday trying to be a present as I can. Routine takes over, but I go against the grind. I am the grind. When there is no movement, I dont know how to be still. stillness is my suffering. idle suffering. it is why I like to come here and document my thoughts. it's healthy for me to read, but I never come back here to read this shit, because that's what it is, bullshit.

I'm convinced no one knows what love is. everyone wants to be repaid, and that has proven over and over again to end in tragedy, something we happen to be good at.

it seems humanity is really good at doing bad things. that's all we hear about yeah? evil. death. homicide. war. drugs. --- fuck me man. can you imagine if we only talked about the good. would more good happen? would we all be unprepared? would be forget about mortality for a fucking second? what happens when we remember how to live, or what it's like to be alive? why do we have to be so sadistic?

do we leave the holy things to the church? ha. I need ton do more diving on religion in general. theology, is it? yeah I wanna know. when was the first church built and what did they do there? how has this ritual continued for thousands of years? lol can you tell that I have been idle? my mind is a vampire. thirsty, so thirsty. And right now? it's just what I need.

lately I haven't been do much of anything. I feel a bit defeated from the last few months if I'm honest. there have been so many things I had to reverse in my thinking patterns. These kids cant get the best of me because I am always at my best, even when I'm not. there is no in-between for me. It's either I'm learning or teaching. there is no low. Low points do not exist for me. Only neutrality. Idling.

I cant believe how advanced we are. I cant believe that year after year we keep making the same fucking things. that just do more ridiculous and useless shit. More shit for us to reflect the artificial intelligence in it all. They want us artificial, that's why it's becoming easier to spot who is actually still human. I am lucky to have found few, and that's all you need, a few, I would even swear but just having one. you only need one human that makes you feel human, not artificial, or disguised. I'm tired of looking for reassurance in a world that is never sure of anything. again, detaching from the out come. ive been really proud of the progress I have been making, it moves slow because there are so many of us, I have to observe the adaptation process, take mental notes and adjust where I need to, or act according to personality. It's why I think I can rule the world. It's why I love being a woman. I live for community, togetherness, and cultivation.

how poetically unnoticed women go. they are noticed in all the wrong ways. I feel bad for the ones who are always under the spotlight. I really always do wonder if they are truly happy. Maybe the ones how have escaped it all. Hollywood loves its corruption. lol, if that paragraph was a map it would be all over the place.

I'm doing okay. I think.

-x

[sporesgalaxy]

hii there!! i hope u dont mind me asking but like. okay im also really really looking to go into biology- mainly because i love the study of life/organisms so much, and ultimately i'd love to become a paleontologist... however, looking at most of the tracks in colleges (which i've already signed up for), a lot of math and chemistry are involved. i Really struggle with these subjects so i want to ask, if you happen to have any knowledge- are these really intense or as daunting as they seem? i dont see myself doing any sort of job that involves like.. complex algebra equations (im aware things like statistics are important), but i know i've got to get through some of these to do what i want in life. ty if you have any info and ive loooved ur recent bio posts im eating them like an anteater

Well! Unfortunately, I don't have an easy answer for you. It really depends on the teacher you get, how the cirriculum is covered, and why you struggled with these subjects.

It might be a good idea to check out the ratemyprofessor entries for the prof.s teaching these subjects at the school(s) you're looking at, to try and get an idea if they're teavhing style could work for you.

I'll tell you what my experience was like as someone who struggled with those subjects too, and hopefully it will give you a better idea of what to expect.

I struggled with math throughout elementary, middle, and high school because of undiagnosed ADHD and anxiety. I often found myself thinking that I'd be doing better if I didn't have to do so manh repetetive problems.

I found my college math classes to be much more manageable by comparison. My professors tended to assign fewer repetetive questions, and there was more variety in the way concepts were applied, which kept me engaged with the work so I wasn't constantly losing my train of thought. But there are a lot of other professors in the world, so that may not be the case everywhere.

Another game changer for me was that many college math professors OFFER PARTIAL CREDIT. If I set everything up properly but pressed the wrong button on my calculator, many professors I had would consider my answer MOSTLY correct.

ALSO: All the math classes I had to take allowed (specific types of) calculators on the exams. I suck ass at basic multiplication but I can set up a hugeass equation like a CHAMP so that was a HUGE help for me.

A lot of math in biology is used for statistics and for determining how things are changing when you study them. I generally found the math needed for biology (and physics) easier to understand than more abstract algebraic equations because I could apply it to real-world situations and intuit approximately what would happen from my own experience. i.e. an exponentially increasing population... the curve looks the way it does on a graph because there are more reproductive individuals reproducing each generation, so the line will go up by a greater amount eith each unit of time that passes. Sorry I couldn't think of a clearer example.

I only took one chemistry class in high school, which I struggled in, and I unfortunately continued to struggle in college. I'm still not entirely sure what didn't click with me, to be honest. It just felt like I could never quite grasp all the factors and rules in my mind at once. It may have been anxiety, which I could only have solved by medicating myself sooner or exposure therapy via a lot more studying (didn't happen because I tend to avoid my stressors compulsively).

I had to retake all but one chemistry class that was required for my degree. I was never quite sure if the professors for summer chem classes just clicked with me more, or if going over the material a second time was what I needed. Once again though, you may be able to recieve partial credit in chem classes. In my experience, chemistry classes were more test-focused than homework-focused, and I often found myself wishing I had more homework to practice on, so finding additional study resources may be your best bet. I used Chemistry Libretexts a lot...

BUT ON THE FLIPSIDE: I had to retake, like, 3 different chemistry classes. I STILL GOT MY DEGREE THOUGH! I sucked a bit but I survived it! Keeping high grades in your electives can help keep your gpa where the college requires it to be for you to graduate.