#iM ALMOST DONE WITH EVERYTHING ON THIS BLOG GOD BLESS

[agcntny]

[hollyhomburg]

hiiii li!! i don’t know why i’m feeling especially mushy today but i was going thru ur masterlist and saw that it’s been more than four years since you published part one of “don’t care if it hurts.” not only have u been creating content and blessing the tumblr fic space for almost five years, but it’s been four years since i first found your blog. i’ve followed u for years, since i was at the end of high school, thru graduation and getting into college, and now as i’m reaching the second half of my college experience. i’ve read ur works on every coast and even sometimes internationally and i’m just so proud of how far you’ve come artistically. ur always evolving as a writer but you’ve never strayed from what’s important to u. u do such a great job of talking to ur readers and acting as a source of comfort for us and i hope that we’ve been the same for u in moments when u needed us. ur so strong but so soft and i appreciate u endlessly for creating and being inspirational to me as a person and writer. i literally would throw my money at u for published copies of so many of ur works, and wanna support u for years to come. i don’t even know how to express how much ur works have helped me as sources of comfort and ways to think about my own identity. i feel like seeing u evolve in tandem to myself has made u an important part of this stage in my life, and i hope i’ve been able to communicate how thankful i am for everything you’ve done for me, even unknowingly. you’ve always been just u, and that was the greatest gift ever. thank u a million times :)

god this is the first ask in a long time that i've legitimately wanted to print out and save, and put somewhere for when i feel like i haven't grown enough or like i haven't made enough of a difference to continue spending- what is sometimes the vast majority of my time- writing and making these stories with you guys. it also did win the 'made li tear up' and 'got read to my mom' award so- congratulations for making me a ball of mush too i guess 😂 you really did walk straight into my house and cut onions with this one.

if i had to make sure you learned one lesson growing up with me its that you treat yourself with kindness and know that you are deserving of a life that is soft and safe for your soul and body, that you are worth every story and every kind word that my character has. you are worth a love story like these, never forget that.

thank you for this message <3 im going to be thinking about this one for a good long while

[justanotherpersonsuniverse]

Ether Solrac: I have come with even more Chloé Couffaine AU headcanons and these are even crazier than the last.

*First off, I've been thinking of a miraculous this Chloé could use and honestly I think the best fit is actually the dragon. Think about it, dragons are usually powerful but vilainized by the people and they're known for being super possessive of their hoard. What better match for an absolute rebel with a heart of gold that's super protective of her family and friends that she sees as her hoard. Sort of a "I'll become the monster so that no one else has to" thing.

* On that note I think Sabrina should get the bee. The bee is supposed to be a representation of will right? Make her story about her learning to speak up for herself as she stands up to her father and overcomes her self-doubts to learn to follow her own morals/values and become a truly independant person. Sort of learning to be her own "queen"

* Now there was an ask that mentioned a Chloé x Sabrina x Alix polyship and now I absolutely love the idea. Spin around the original concept of them being the mean girl squad and instead make them Team Rebel. Chloé and Alix are already best friends and they see this sweet innocent girl in desperate need of letting her feral side out so they almost immediately adopt her as part of the group.

* The connection between Chloé and Sabrina has more or less been cemented but I was thinking of something extra crazy for the Chloé and Alix part. This Alix is one that has already altered the timeline. She comes from a timeline where Chlolix was a already established and they had a more or less canon Chloé that has been through her redemption.

One day she gets warned of an urgent anamoly way back in the past, she stops it from causing a catastrophic event but in doing so, there was an unintended butterfly effect that set up the Chloé Couffaine universe. Alix is conflicted becuase as much as she wants to change things back she can't risk the timeline, not only that, but this Chloé looks so much happier than her own, so open and happy with the girl she is, that she can't bring herself to change that either. So now she has mixed feelings seeing the girl she technically loved be so different and yet so similar at the same time.

It probably doesn't help that this Chloé has made her the best friend and can be incredibly affectionate with those she truly cares about and trusts. She ends up falling for this Chloé just as hard, if not harder, than the "original" Chloé.

As for Alix and Sabrina, she quickly admits that Chloé was right when she said that Sabrina was "a precious cinamon roll that must be protected at all costs." Without the damage canon chloe did, this Sabrina is still shy but not as afraid to actually open up. And when she does, Alix is floored by how great a conversationalist Sabrina can be, and how much she enjoys listening to the girl speak her mind. Both her and Chloé become determined to solidify this side of her and even bring out that feral streak they've been catching glimpses of.

* For the student council elections Sabrina actually becomes the president with the support of Chloé and Alix in an attempt to bring her out of her shell. Also this helps give Marinette a god damn break becuase holy shit that girl does not need so much on her plate...

* Caline has a huge crush on Anakra ever since she first met her at a parent-teacher conference. Chloé is their biggest shipper. (Also this is here becuase this blog created this ship and so it shall remain until its final days. Is it a blessing? Is it a curse? I personally love it, but I'll let you all be the judge.)

* Chloé has a pair of pitch black pilot sunglasses that she puts on whenever she thinks "shits about to go down." Anyone remember Ash's Squirtle and how it always took out its sunglasses whenever it wanted to be dramatic as fuck? That's Chloé.

I'm sure I'll think of more but I think that's enough for one post.

——

FFFFFFFUCK I LOVE THAT.

POOR ALIX OH SHIT

I think unrequited Chlolix is amazing, especially with these timeline shenanigans, especially if she’s keeping that hidden even after Chlobrina hits canon. It’s melancholic.

I’m now imagining some “TELL YOUR DARKEST SECRET” akuma showing up and hitting Alix- Chloe somehow gets pulled into it, and they pass out.

They fall into Alix’s mind, into a replica of where they fell asleep, then It warps the world and like some screen projector, shows what happened. Chloe watches a brief moment of the past timeline in silence, of the loving looks in her own and alix’s eyes, Alix waving at Chloe and saying she’ll be back once the timeline is fixed, and how that never happened.

She looks back at a shaken and horrified Alix, who never wanted Chloe Couffaine to see that. From both shame, guilt, and hurt. And it’s just.. painful cause Chloe Couffaine just doesn’t see Alix that way and can’t force herself to. And Alix just smiles and says “I know. You’ve always done what you wanted. It’s what I love about you. Here and then.”

She just goes silent before speaking again “Im really happy, that, you’re happy. You know. That’s all I’ve ever wanted you to be. Happy. Okay. and you are right now, and that’s everything to me. Even if you aren’t.. uh- mine anymore.”  Chloe asks if this means Alix knows who her birth mom is and Alix nods, but says “Trust me, I think it’s good that you don’t know” and Chloe nods. They hug, and Alix does her best not to break down, but after seeing those memories again- she can’t hold it in, and she admits that it genuinely feels like someone she loved died.

The projection dies and they’re left in the room again. Chloe being conflicted a bit, as she had no idea and felt a little hurt that Alix never told her, and Alix feeling tired.

No one asks what happened. 

[antcassese]

Whats been going on in my life? Can you handle it?

Everyone knows the rules.... song choice first and foremost!

All My Life - Foo Fighters, damn this song gets me going.

The last 6 months feel almost like a blur. I think a lot of us can relate to this? Im certain I’m not the only one that had a crazy 2020. I’ve literally watch so many of you fall victim to job loss, relationships falling out, and just all around chaos. I’ve witnessed you guys experience this! Just like you’ve watched me, from a distance you’ve watched me.

You’ve watched as my marriage crumbled. You’ve heard about me moving into a damn shed. You watched me walk away from a well paying position. You seen me cry, you’ve seen me talk ill of people in a way not even I condone, unless otherwise provoked.. You’ve been there for me, and didn't even know it. I knew it though. 

Starters, I lost my dad around Christmas in 2019. This man didn't take anyone's shit, even if they had him by the balls. He was sweet, loved his family, but absolutely took no shit. He was the fucking man, but as life goes. We all live to die. During this time, I was still with my wife. A time that I needed to focus, I needed to keep my family together. I was the man now, and it was time to act. 

I had a hard time being intentional having my wife constantly hold me back. It was hard to mourn when I had a significant other who insisted the attention be on her over my parent I lost. This was the the beginning of the end for my marriage, sadly.

I married into what I believed was someone who had the same morals, same ideologies as me. I was sadly mistaken, and after learning the we were on two different wavelengths, the universe did it’s thing. In a matter of a couple months, after many disturbing dealing’s with my wife, I had to cut my losses. This simply was a bad investment and I had to get the fuck out of dodge.

I'm sure you’ve been there, hell, you may be dealing with this as we speak. Constantly asking yourself, “Is this it?” “Is this person really for me”? 

Or maybe you are 10000% certain about what you have, in that case, I am happy for you.

BUT if you’re asking yourself those questions, there's already a problem. Run while you have a chance.

My dad died, god bless his soul. He was a dad, with shortcomings but still, a dad. Losing him crushed me. My marriage? Shit happens! It obviously wasn’t meant to be, and no it wasn’t a mistake! Never! I don't regret it for one second. It just didn’t quite pan out. It’s okay, I had bigger plans waiting for me....

One door closes, another opens! Always be willing to go where the wind blows you, never know where it could take you.

In the mix of a divorce, came leaving my well paying job. I really enjoyed the work I did, having worked in Manhattan for sometime was a huge accomplishment that not many people can say they’ve done. But frankly, It didn't fill me up anymore. It didn’t cut it for me. 

As much as I love money, as most of you know. Some referring to me as even frugal at times, the money couldn’t buy my sanity. Everyday I fought the demon in my head to quit. I wanted to quit because I wanted to dedicate my life to making an impact, not just making money. This was hard for anyone to understand from the outside looking in, it was hard for even me to understand what the hell I was attempting to accomplish by quitting my job to pursue, what? Making an impact doesn't pay the bills? Know what I mean. But I stopped thinking, and one day I snapped. 

I snapped, I was done thinking about my plans, and instead. It was time to start acting. Simple as that

To me, making an impact is and always will be more important then money. I hear from many of you everyday thanking me and praising me for writing, my vlogs, my one on one conversations. THAT SHIT MOVES ME!

You wouldn’t believe how full I am after hearing I made an impact in a strangers life. 

That's what is important to me. Making a difference, one soul out of time. The money is nice but it doesn't move me the way it moves some. I have to know I helped someone at the end of the day or I feel empty.

This is how I’ve found myself. and these days, I'm not playing games. It’s crunch time, come along or get the fuck out of the way.

These last few months have been devastating for me though.. They have torn me in directions that I didn’t know were even possible. I can’t stress how hard life has hit me.

But guess what?

I am so fucking thankful for it. I literally couldn’t be more happy that my life has played out this way. 

My dad passing hurt so bad, hurt. But his passing finally revealed to me what it’s like to be a man. He showed me, and since December, I’ve been a bull. Everything that was meant to break me, only fueled me.

Every set back only made me buck harder, every single day.

My marriage was important because my parents never got married, and I owed it to myself to get married and live a happy life. Being married doesn't necessarily bring happiness though, reality check! 

No job? Whatever

You see, living amongst chaos is normal to me! I love this shit.

I literally strive off of the chaos. My best friend turned out to betray me, as I suspected he would. Never felt betrayal so great. I couldn’t be more grateful for his choice, as life has a way of revealing itself guys.

find solace in the hell you might be in. we all feel hell somewhere in our life. double down, get a plan together, and be ready to execute.

Don't be a victim, no one likes a sissy. 

Next blog isn’t about whats happen to me this year, it’s alllllll about what is going to be happening!

#ONLYTHEFUTURE

Buckle up. Love yall

[heroquills-a]

s1lentsnip3r replied to your post: hmmmmmmmmmm……….. i feel like doing a random mun...

bet

cracks knuckles.

@s1lentsnip3r @chaosmixed @metallumdash 

words can’t describe how impressed i am by how much you bring your muses to life bwaze. i used to like, not really give a darn heck about metal sonic at all? but after that first thread we had where sonic and proxy got into a fight, i was immediately hooked. you just do such an incredible job at fleshing out characters that i otherwise wouldn’t have really thought much of before and you just have this unique and interesting spin on them that feels fresh. i love the way you play the chao and whisper’s wisps and atia is just a little gremlin but i love them so much, and i’ve literally never seen anyone play chaos before. you just have this way of utilizing that potential that your characters and concepts have and it’s just really awesome to watch. i love it. absolutely a stellar roleplayer. absolutely stellar mun!!

@skyfcx @masterprotector @cosmcther

ties you to a chair. listen here little mister. youre probably one of the OG ppl in this rpc that i’ve lowkey looked up to since first joining. you’ve already heard it plenty of times already but your writing is just ?? stellar ?? from the way you use colorful idioms, expressions, metaphors, to how you capture movement and action in such an engaging way. it’s always a treat to read. the way you portray your muses is just always spot on and i love how seamlessly you capture their mannerisms and speech patterns. your headcanons for tails and knuckles just make me so giddy they just feel so right for their characters, and as far as rosalina goes--- while i know next to nothing about the mario franchise or this character in particular i’m still intrigued enough to peek in on what she’s up to every now and then. over all, you’re a rad roleplayer and a fun person to chat with ooc !! 

@chaosbcrne 

i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again. i adore how you write shadow. i’m constantly blown away by how authentic he always feels and how realistic you write him while still remaining accurate and true to his character. like i legit cannot even think of any other place or media i’ve seen besides the games themselves (before sega started botching up his character anyway) where he’s portrayed as accurately as you write him. you manage to balance the serious, aloof, hostile side of him with his playful, competitive, smug side AND the inner naive, almost child like side almost perfectly. and then there’s more, because you add so much depth to him and realistically expand on so many unexplored facets of his character and his roots !! you can just tell this is a character who’s endured so many hardships and is still trying to recover and move on, and despite everything that’s hardened him into the person he is today he still has that innocent curiosity about the world and it makes me so emo every. single. time. you just put so much work into him and it shows, from your icons to your headcanon posts, to even the most minute detail. even when you host events you just go So Hard at it you’re literally out here setting the standard dude. and don’t even get me started on your writing style. i was hooked by the very first thread we did, i felt like i could never hold a candle to it honestly. just. the way you narrate shadow’s feelings and thoughts, how you capture his actions, his movement, his speech patterns, is just so good. and your vocabulary is so colorful and rich. just. hgnfhg its top tier content ALRIGHT you inspire me to push myself and to keep improving all the time and i have to say i couldn’t ask for a better writing partner. i love you so much eph 💕💕💕

@1110-01111011

hello yes trikey i love your omega so much. i’ve never really thought much of the death bot before but seeing all the headcanons and fleshing out you do for him just makes him so much more interesting and fascinating. down to the most intrinsic detail you put in for him it’s just really cool to see and adds so much to him that just !! i love it man. every time i think abt omega now my mind just automatically goes back to your portrayal because he is Just omega. i appreciate all the depth you add to him and his relationships to the rest of his team, it’s so pleasing to see and really helps solidify how strong team dark’s dynamic truly is..... not to mention your art is hecking gorgeous??? like damn dude, goals. anyway,, thank u for the blessed omega content. absolutely 10/10

@coolxnxblue @oforbis @hcrofraid @mastcrplanncr @powderbluestreaks

toxi i immediately fell in love with your sonic the first time we ever interacted. you just capture his sass so well, i just could not stop giggling that first night. he’s still my favorite sonic in this rpc, to be honest. and don’t even get me started on your other muses. it still baffles me how you manage to take on such a huge raster of characters yet manage to flesh them out all so well. every one of them feels so evenly developed and solid and just like bwaze you make me care about characters that i otherwise wouldn’t have before. i feel like i have a huge newfound appreciation for eggman bc of you and unsurprisingly he’s now my fave eggman on here hands down. and it goes without saying your writing is just, phenomenal. you capture dialogue so beautifully, the way you narrate on the feelings your characters are experiencing is engaging, to the point i’m lowkey intimidated by it sometimes LMAO. also your AUs are just rad as hell? and rlly interesting?? and your art style too ????? 10/10 roleplayer, i just think youre neat.

@antibadnik @godcontained

hey you? yes you. i love your muses so much. i especially love how you write amy, to be honest. she’s been my favorite character since forever and like?? you do just such a good job with her? i appreciate that you choose not to erase her intense affection for sonic, because more often than not i see people tone it way down to almost non-existent and it really is just such a big part of her character. i like the way you delve into that mindset of her’s, and expand on it and how it affects her. i also just. love your writing too. you just have this way of conveying feeling in your writing that’s always a punch to the gut you can feel it that hard. your headcanons for elise are really interesting too and definitely nothing i’ve actually seen before, what with how her powers work and how having to go emotionally dormant has effected her after all this time.  also, i love ava. she is baby. it’s so cool getting to see a mute character!! all in all, its just good content man. god i love football.

@team-phantom @heartfelt-silver

pandaaaa i adore you !!! you were like my first friend in this heckin rpc. all of our dash shenanigans always have me wheezing and i just love your boys so much. i can certainly say without a shadow of a doubt that zero is one of my favorite takes on infinite. its hard to believe that he’s the same jackal who almost completely helped eggman take over the world--- he’s just come so far, he seamlessly fits into the rest of the cast. i adore how he works off of his team, and all their own unique little quirks that set them apart from each other. your headcanons and lore for your muse is just so sweet. and god i can’t get enough of your art?? your doodles always are a blessing to see ;-; i always appreciate you youre just such a sweet and kind mun, you’re so welcoming of ppl here and have this way of making ppl feel at home in this community. it absolutely wouldn’t be the same without you. keep it up <3

@lightdash @heartlop @enrichedheart

YOU. yes you. ame you’re so freakin’ cool and sweet. you’re always so nice and welcoming to people in the rpc it’s always a treat getting the chance to talk to you !! you’re another one of those peeps i look up to in this community TBH and youre muses are just portrayed and written so well!! i can just tell you’ve poured many years of thought, consideration, and work into your muses to the point that they’re just so finely tuned. i love the aesthetic you utilize for you blogs, from your icons to just the way you go about formatting your threads? and not to mention, your art style ??? is just so cute ??? ngl i lowkey wanna collab with you one of these days bc i just adore how you draw the sonic cast ;_; thank you for being a part of this rpc !! you’re wonderful !

@projectlightfox

moggg you’re so nice and chill to talk to. i love volt and harmony so much... they fit in really good with sonic world and mesh well with just about any characters i’ve seen them interact with so far--- even if its someone they don’t get along with. i’ve said it before but theyre just a really charming little duo and im always happy to see them on my dashboard. i love the overall aesthetic they got going, two travelers roaming the world from dimension to dimension. harmony is just a little bundle of precious fluffy joy and her interactions with sonic always make me cry. and volt--- he’s such a good dad !! he’s a really neat character and i’m certainly interested in learning more about the both of them. and as i said, you’re a rad person to talk to, i appreciate how welcoming and supportive you are of people. and your art style? absolutely adorable. thank you for being in this rpc ;-;

@dieviskais @solfading 

king!! i’ve never seen anyone write the way you do, choosing to shift the view point onto the reader as if they themselves are the muse. it’s such a unique and interesting way to look into your muse’s mindsets and express how they are feeling and what they’re doing. your take on silver is very fresh compared to the way he’s typically written. i appreciate you don’t take the baby silver uwu route like don’t get me wrong he IS baby but he’s not a baby. you certainly have really neat headcanons surrounding his backstory and how he grew up, it’s nice to see the grim reality of his harsh bleak life being represented. it’s good !! your other muses are intriguing too and i’m eager to learn more about them. i love auburn?? he’s a really cool oc dude his aesthetic and powers are A+. and you know, i may be terrible at expressing it but you’re a delight to talk to!! never feel bad or discouraged for popping into my dms i honestly appreciate the company ;-; thank u for being u

@orbviously / @cubeviously

THESE TWO BOTS. i love them so much. literally every time i see orbot or cubot now in any context i just think back to your portrayal of them hebby, they’re just so dang spot on and good. i love how you go about interacting with people with these two tbh it never fails to make me giggle. i love your art style too it’s just pleasing to look at! you have so many creative AUs for these bots i’m honestly impressed by how much you manage to create with these guys man--- from their human/bot designs to their mobianbot designs theyre just so cool ?? even your other muses are always entertaining to watch regardless of what fandom theyre from youre just so fun to interact with. and just, you’re always a pleasure to talk to ooc, youre always putting a smile on my face! youre awesome hebby 

@fishing-purple-cat

yes hi. sunny your take on big is so blessed. you’ve done so much justice for him. i’ve always really liked big tbh but i just love how much depth you put into his character, his backstory and his mannerisms. i love that you like,, actually give him a personality outside being a slow thinker. i can tell you’ve really developed your writing style with him, it speaks volumes about how much work you really put into writing him and it shows? heck, you even go the extra mile to draw your own icons and hang on i need a second to gush about your art because holy DAMN dude. your anatomy and painting abilities are nothing short of impressive--- especially your nack for painting backgrounds. i srsly gotta commission you at some point when i’m able to, heck. anyway, the rpc certainly wouldn’t be the same without you here

@lnfinitc

dude i love your take on infinite. he’s just about everything he should have been in forces, and even more. i love how malicious and intimidating you write him and your take on his speech patterns is just straight up eye-candy. i love your writing style, its so flavorful and rich--- your headcanons and lore on how infinite works is just astounding. and i like how you incorporate your drawings into your replies or threads too like even if its just icons your style is so heckin pretty ?? gosh dang. i’m definitely looking forward to interacting more in the future bc ur muse is just really fun and you seem like such a rad person !!

@pistolbitten

uhhh hello yes... while we haven’t interacted very much so far i JUST GOTTA SAY, i super enjoy your take on fang. from what i can tell he’s very well-rounded and fleshed out and a really interesting villain. i may or may not’ve been lowkey paying attention to that angel’s thesis thread you were doing w bwaze and aaron and i gotta say. holy damn. fang just done FUCKED UP. im certainly looking forward to him and shade interacting lmao. your writing style is so good too hh... just yeah i don’t have a whole lot to say if only because we haven’t interacted as much as i have with some of the other ppl on here BUT i certainly am looking forward to bc you seem cool. i’m loving what i’m seeing so far. have nack shoot sonic. DO IT.

@mobian-merc @funis-infinite 

duuuudeeee. i’ll be honest i was super intimidated by you at first asdkjsah i don’t even know why i was ??? but like. you’re so hecking nice and fun to talk to ;_; scourge is an actual literal dipshit yet you manage to make him very likable and you have such a fun take on him. i’ve always been a little conflicted on the character tbh because of how popular he is and he seems like the type i’d like but i knew nothing about him and was kinda put off by the over hype sometimes, but honestly? your portrayal won me over. i love him now. he’s so stupid and hE’S GREAT. your infinite also seems so cool too i gotta hecking respond to that starter you made me when i get the chance, im looking forward to infinite & sonic just. talking and sassing eachother probably. i really like your writing style too!!! and your icons are absolutely gorgeous ok. alright, that is all.

@flyinginfreedom

uhhhhhhh hello i love your rouge so much ???? she’s literally so cool... you capture her aesthetic and over all mysterious yet cunning vibe perfectly and it’s just always a pleasure to see her on my dash. i loved her interactions with sonic during eph’s roadtrip event so much. your headcanons just feel so her and spot on, and you still manage to add so much depth and personality to her i just love it so much. i love your blog’s aesthetic down to the icons, and even the way you format your threads. over all just a stellar rouge blog and a really cool & chill mun!!

@rosehammcr @antihedgehog

hi rosie uhm i love your amy so much ok. she’s such a sweet heart, i love how you incorporate her tarot cards ?? it’s literally so cool... and the accuracy on those readings is shocking. she’s just such a sweet heart god i’m getting emo thinking abt her tbh like amy is !! one of my fave characters and !! you write her so well !! and your eggman too, god he’s incredible. i love how sinister yet goofy he can be he’s just a perfect combination of intimidating and silly. your takes on orbot and cubot also bring a smile to my face and i love how you incorporate them into your interactions!! you also just seem like a rlly rad person and i’d love to interact more !! yeah !

@a-wind-of-freedom

yuniiiiiiIII !!  you’re such a sweet heart and your sonic is too. i’ve never seen someone play sonic the way you do before and it’s certainly interesting and unique !! you’ve got so many neat an thought out verses and AUs too, theyre all really intriguing !  our interactions with our sonics are always rlly blessed tbh starlight is just precious. i always appreciate getting to work with you as well for commission stuff, you’ve really been helping me out in that regard. plus you give me something artistic to work on and the chance to push my talents ! ;-; all in all you’re just a really sweet person and have a kind aura about you ! ;;

@champiionic

clears throat. hi yes you’ve been one of my fave sonics since day one. you’re just so creative with your muse its honestly impressive how many things you’ve able to come up with for sonic. from the portrayal you bring to the table down to your muse aesthetic its always just spot on you’ve got the blue speedster’s whole vibe down to a T. and your writing is just ? kisses my fingers. beautiful. your sonic is just so dang authentic, seeing him on my dash is always a pleasant sight. and i know this post is namely about sonic rpc muns & muses but i already love bubbles and blossom. i used to watch powerpuff girls when i was rlly little so its a real nostalgia trip to see them on my dashboard.

@hcpebloom @rcsebloom

bunny !! ur heckin sweet.. i love ur amy so much HSDFHDJ she’s just so soft. and unique too!! your headcanons for her are just so cute and make her stand out in her own way and i just appreciate that yo. and i admittedly don’t know a whole lot about cosmo since i havent really watched that far into sonic x but you’ve certainly got my attention with her. we just gotta interact more man ur muses are so precious !! ;_; 

@fortruechaos 

you !! your shadow is so good dude ! your portrayal of him is just so hecking accurate,, i highly appreciate how noble you write him to be. he’s serious, he’s prickly, but he’s got the world’s best interest at heart and it makes my heart do the fluttery thing. your writing is so good too gosh. no to mention youre just so hecking nice ??? youre just overall a rlly sweet mun & i appreciate your presence here in the rpc

@glittcrngcld @livelifc

hey fretcher ? ily. your muses are just so good from your canon characters to your ocs, i just love them sm?? and your ART? i swoon every time i see your doodles on my dash i’m still not over those doodles of lilly and azure ;-; not to mention your edits are scarily good like shit dude teach me your ways. your takes on your muses are awesome man i love ur sonic he’s such a MEME. and elise !!! she makes me so emo god. thank u for your blessed portrayals of these characters ! @elektrisch-felidae​

YOU. precious is just, precious?? HAH. i love her, she’s so cool tbh. she’s so chill and laid back and seems like the kinda cool cat sonic can totally vibe with. you yourself are also rlly chill and fun to interact with--- even if we haven’t much so far. its no secret i just love sonic ocs so much and precious is just awesome. i love the idea of electricity powers. absolutely need to have sonic hang with her more ;;

@coldheartbeauty 

SPEAKING of cool cats with cool powers, i love raven. her sass is just super entertaining to see on the dashboard tbh. i have to see her and sonic get into a sass off one of these days. her powers are also really cool too ? she reminds me of blaze in a sense, but just completely different in her own right. i also just hella love your art style its so cute, your doodles are always adorable to see!! 

INHALES. ok. im done. if i missed anyone i am so sorry i ran out of steam. thank you all so much for making this rpc such an entertaining, dynamic, and creative place to be !!! 

[all-the-heart-you-cannot-see]

Highschool Boy - Elippo

Hey guys....just to clarify...i don’t know a lot about italian culture so sorry if some things don’t make sense in that context...i was just feeling like writing an Elippo fan fic... if you guys like it i can open another blog and take requests.

hope you enjoy.

Filippo had had his eye on Elia for quite a while now, it wasn’t tipical for him to be lurking around younger boys, especially highschool ones, they were always so “manly” and worried about what everybody else thought...he wasn’t intersted in raising a son, he wanted a hook up, maybe even a boyfriend.

Elia Santini was a different type of highschool boy, he had, in fact, stalked him to death, and the boy was pretty funny, his facebook page were mostly memes and for some reason, and he knew this had nothing to do with the fact that he kinda liked him, Elia seemed a little gay to him...just tiniest bit, there was a light at the end of the tunel, a feeling in his gut that telled him that the guy might actually be into boys.

he didn’t make much of it, he was intelligent, yes, but also a fool when it came to his own personal life, he still didn’t know how he had managed to fix Martino’s dating life if he couldn’t even figure out his own.

so when the big day came, when he would finally meet the rest of Martino’s friends...boy, was Elia a big surprise...he was sure now it wasn’t just him imagining stuff, Elia Santini had kinda flirted with him, surprisingly.

it was very subtle, first stares that he thought were because of his odd fashion choices, then starting conversations with him out of nowhere and finally, the top of the cake, when hugging goodbye the guy had actually stopped an aditional of two seconds to look him in the eye afterwards.

Filippo was flying...high. this couldn’t be his imagination, could it? 

normally he would DM the guy, Filo was always pretty straight foward with this kind of thing, but he also knew he could easly scare him away...what if he had misinterpreted the whole thing? he then decided it was time to go back to the basics.

liking his memes and leaving silly comments. 

god how old was he, 12? he was ashamed...if Marti or Ele could see him....they would give him soooooo much shit about it.

luckly, Elia reciprocated, he liked his comments or replied, he even went as far as liking a pride post he had done last year about pride, like.....was that not sing? it had to be rigth?

he made a decision....he would try and make a move on that Villa boys fundraising Ele had ask him to come to.

He entered the party with confidence, as always, Filo never carried himself with any less than that, he noticed Ele looking around for Edoardo, tho if he were to ask her, she would deny everything.

the Sava brothers were having a tough time with love.

He saw the boys almost inmediatly, Martino slightly towering over Nico as he leaned in for a kiss, both smiling as usual, Luchino combining multiple drinks in a cup as Elia cheared and Giovanni looked at them in disbelief.

granted, Elia was kind of childish...but he liked him anyways...and he was determined to not leave that party until he was sure wether or not he liked him too.

Filippo walked towards them.

“hey guys” he said, Gio was the first to say hi, he noticed while greeting the happy couple how Gio and Elia exchanged looks.

“what are you doing here?” Luchino asked, everybody laughed. 

“well, i can leave if you want” he suggested gesturing towards the exit, they laughed again “nah im just, looking over Ele, she has been acting wierd lately”

Gio shrugged his shoulders and clapped “who wants to go find some pretty girls to dance?” 

“we’ll go with you” Nico quickly responded.

Luchino frowned “ok but, what about my beer mix?”

“it’s gonna taste like shit Luchi, c’mon, maybe you can find Silvia” said Gio putting a hand around his shoulders and dragging him along.

“what about Elia” he asked, Gio slapped him in the back of the head.

“remember what we talked about earlier?”

Filippo tried to act like he haven’t heard that... but he was almost sure now...Elia liked him too...somehow...the gods, the universe, mother nature, hell, maybe even jesus...had decided to bless him.

“so...how is it going?” Elia asked him with a smile, Filippo smiled back, this was going to be a productive night.

they talked...a lot, about different things, their favorite tv shows, how awful highschool was, they talked about his friends, their life, what they liked...and when the music got too loud they went outside...it was a beautiful starry night...like the planets had aligned for him to get this moment or something.

they sat on a bench and pretended for a while to be two straight dudes talking to each other under the moonlight.

“why are you really here?” Elia asked him after a moment of silence...their hands were close together, their pinkies almost touching, the phantom of a smiled danced over Elia’s lips and god did he wanted to kiss him.

“i’m looking after Ele” he replied back, knowing it was kind useless at this point.

“c’mon Filo, im sure you can be a better liar” he teased, Filippo laughed.

“ok, you caught me...im actually here cause i like a guy”

“ oh really?” Elia tried to sound smooth, but Filo could see his cheeks turning red “and how is that going?”

“pretty bad actually, so far all we’ve done is pretend we don’t like each other while we stare into our eyes under the moonlight”

Elia laughed and looked away, he started to move his legs back and forth and for a second Filo feared he might had misunderstood things, then Elia sighed and he understood it was something else.

“maybe” he stared, his voice was soft, low, and nervous “maybe he isn’t sure of what he really wants”

“well...” Filo reached for Elia’s hand and covered it with his “that’s ok...there is no rush”

Elia looked at him, and then at their hands, he seemed to doubt for a second before cursing and subsequently...crushing his lips to Filippo’s.

Filo was surprised to say the least, first beacuse he wasn’t expecting it and second because for a highschool boy...Elia was a really good kisser.

hands still together on the bench Filo used his free hand to hold Elia’s cheeck, he grabbed that one too, and suddendly the nigth was a lot less cold and a bit more dark...and this time, Filippo had a feeling this one would be different.

[pasttorn]

URL RESPONSES ! ⟡ NOT ACCEPTING !

@moonchains​ said: my url !

DO I FOLLOW THEM ? WHY ? -  of course ! !  of fucking course ! ! ! i’ve got a mega bad memory but i think i was the one who followed first ? ?  i’m always mega happy to see new upper moon blogs / demon blogs around in general so i wouldn’t doubt it if i saw them floating around & instantly followed ihugdkfmv bUT HONESTLY ? ? ? i stayed because holy fuck i love how they write koku ? how they portray his entire character ? ?  top quality content, i tell ya. DO WE WRITE / DO I WANT TO WRITE WITH THEM ? - YEAH WE DO ! ! ! we have a thread going on ( which i have replied to & queued ! ! ! though it might need some plotting / talking out because akaza is not the most open of guys & the two of them pit together might make for some mighty awkward interactions ) & i’ve sent ‘em a couple asks & i’m always blown away by how good their responses are ? ? ? i’m very much looking forward to plotting with them more & having a bunch more threads with them because holy heck i adore them already ! AN AU IDEA FOR OUR MUSES - i mean this is my go-to verse for kny muses but ! ! ! modern verse ! ! ! it’s so good ! ! so easy to work with ! ! ! might be slightly harder to find ways modern koku might interact with the twins, but it’s still gonna be so much fun to talk about. otherwise ? ? plots / threads between koku & senjurou in your alternate 1 verse would also be super interesting. i love pitting sen w/ muses he usually wouldn’t interact with & just ? it might be a bit hard to plot that out on a main verse but it’d ? ? be somewhat simpler to think their interactions through in the alt verse ? idk ! there’s so many potential verses / au’s we could work with & there’s things we could write that i just can’t come up with now, but might later on ! A SONG FOR OUR MUSES - GOD I DON’T KNOW ! ! ! i’m bad at songs in general & since i don’t know much about how they interact with each other apart from the very little we’ve talked about them ( which is entirely my fault, since i’m bad at keeping up with im’s ) idk of a good song but ! ! if anything, the song  not gonna die tonight by skillet gives off vibes that both of them could relate to ? ? i guess ? ? “ i won't take this world's abuse / i won't give up or refuseThis is how it feels when you're bent and broken / this is how it feels when your dignity's stolen / when everything you love is leaving / you hold on to what you believe in ″ i guess is something that fits them because i mean, they both refuse to die during their battles ( until something happens that stops them ) but the whole  this is how it feels when your dignity’s stolen is just oof because it reminds me of his inferiority to his twin ? & just :” > DO I SHIP OUR MUSES ? - OOF THIS IS A TOUGH ONE. do i ship them platonically ? yeah ! i do ! ! it’s got its share of tension, yeah-- like all demon friendships / relationships are, since they’re not exactly the most family friendly kind. but do i love the thought of them interacting enough that akaza would be willing to actively spend time with koku & koku not being so done with his & douma’s shit ? absolutely ! otherwise ! ! !  idk about any thing else, since i can’t see anything between them other than something platonic, but i would be down for plotting stuff to see where things might go ( will it get worse & into a hateship ? or better into something else ? who knows ! akaza is finicky when it comes to demons so it most probably will either stay the same or get worse but ihuegrjdfm yeah ) ! WHAT DO I THINK ABOUT THE MUN ? - goD I ADORE YOU ! ! ! !  i very much love seeing you on the dash ( if you can’t tell by the way i like almost every ooc post i see you make uhregijdfmvc ) & i love hearing about what you have to say & just ! ! ! in the very brief moment we talked to each other, you seemed like such a nice & kind, & mostly patient person to talk to & just ! ! ! hi i care you so much thank you for blessing us with your presence ! ! OVERALL OPINION - Y’ALL SHOULD BE FOLLOWING THEM ! ! ! ! ! their koku is absolutely amazing & their writing is spectacular, so you’re missing out big time if you haven’t seen their or followed their blog yet ♡. also if you don’t send me a picture of your new ( not really new anymore ihuregdfm ) bunny soon, one of these days i’m gonna riot. BLOG RATE - 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10

[urban-witch-tales]

1K FOLLOWERS...STORY TIME!

Honestly guys you have no idea how surreal this is for me. I didn’t start this blog for followers (although SUPER appreciate it) or likes, or reblogs. I started this as a way to save all the Wicca/Witchy stuff I can find seeing as I’m somewhat a closeted witch.... So for my 1k followers I’m gonna do a little Story time.

All of my life i was raised catholic. I got baptized, did my first communion, was even in sunday school to do my confirmation while in High school, but i never agreed with it and never connected. I ended up not completing my confirmation and refused to do so. Fast forward to about 20yo, mom even asked me to complete my confirmation but I’m kinda struggling with the whole aspect of catholocism and christianity. but I also felt lost not believing in anything.  There were just too many unexplained things in life that i couldn’t just chalk up to “things happen.” I definitely believed in a high being but couldn’t commit to Christianity because there were sooooo many things that i just couldn’t deal with or agree to. At 21 I had my daughter and was having her baptized by the catholic church because thats just what we did, so even though i didnt even agree with it (nor did my bf/father to my child) its just culturally what we do. theres this class you have to take prior to your child being baptized and everything was all great at first. Priest was talking about how its our jobs as parents and god parents to raise the child in the church and to follow the path of god and jesus..... and then all of a sudden it wasnt anything about baptism, He started ranting about gays going to hell and being sinners, he ranted about premarital sex being a sin. and People having kids out of wedlock, at that point i was FURIOUS seeing as me and my bf were not married. it took everything in me to not storm out. and all i kept telling myself was that it was almost over. Had family not flown in to see this baptism i probably wouldnt have done it. but for me it was the breaking point i refused to be apart of something that was so vile. And yes i know that not all catholics feel this way and not all churches spew that bs.... but the majority of the churches i went to did. and the majority of people in my culture that were catholics/christians believed this. so i was done. 

fast forward to 24yo, october 2018.... still struggling to find something that i could agree about spiritually... i felt like i was missing something. And even spoke to my aunt about it but she couldnt really talk much about it because she was raised catholic and thats just all it had been her whole life. One day Im just thinking about it and it just popped into my head.... Wicca!! Since middle school, about 13ish i had been interested in wicca. But as mentioned above that wasnt going to happen at 13. But im an adult now and i figured i can make my own decisions and believe and worship how i want to. And thats the beginning of my path. I dove into research and studying of Wicca and witchcraft. I instantly fell in love and connected. For the first time ever i wasnt confused, or lost. everything i read i agreed, and felt like it was right. I loved the idea of a duotheistic Goddess and God. that they are omnipresent and not just some god residing sowhere far that i have to fear or i wont get into heaven. I loved that the Goddess and God werent portrayed as something you worship because they are superior, but because they work with you and are by your side. 

So because i wasnt ready to open up about this to my family i started a tumblr for all things Witchy and Wicca.... I started this for me to just keep track of all the things that interested me and that i want to try. I never for a moment thought that i was going to end up with a 1k following. This is really amazing and I have no idea even how to express the excitement i have towards this! I really hope this continues to grow. And please guys don’t hesitate to message me or send asks! I’m all for getting to know the witchblr and wiccablr community!!! 

And i want to give a shout out to my 1000th follower! @winter-vblack thank you so much!! and thank you to everyone who’s followed me thus far! 

Blessed be!! 🌒🌕🌘

~Astria Artemisia ✨🌙

[chloeafrazier]

Bay from switched at Birth .

hi everyone today i will  be talking about Bay from switched at birth now look i know bay did things wrong in the show because she did  i mean she ran away from home she took money from her dads car wash and a lot of other stuff i am not saying that she never messed up or anything like that because she did but i will say that she was not done wrong in the show because she was okay so here is the thing so when they found out about the switch i felt like John Treated Bay Differently after they found out about the switch he started overcompensating with Daphne look i know that when its all said and done Daphne is his blood and bay is Regina blood i get that but Bay is still the Daughter that he raised and who he watched grow up and over the few years on the show he was very hard on her now look i know that it is not the actors fault i am only talking about the characters actions in this blog post so here is the thing about John is that i felt that he looked at bay almost as if she was a failure at everything she did i felt that he did not see her as his Daughter anymore after he met Daphne and everything happened and yes i know that bay was not his biological child but like i said she is still the child that he raised and i just did not like the way he treated her after they found out the girls were switched like when she stole money from the car wash and kathryn said i will give you the money to pay your dad back and your gonna work it off every cent but when Daphne got into to trouble for vandalizing the tractor they were like  i am spend whatever it takes to help you so when bay dose something wrong it was like oh well sorry bay you have to deal with it but when Daphne dose something wrong it is like oh don t worry Daphne  i will help you i will do whatever it takes for you and also when the girls moved out bay needed help on her Light bill and john was like well sorry about that i am  not gonna help you your on your own  but when Daphne   needed help with he school books in collage it was like yes i will always help you and on the last episode of the show he told Daphne the day you become a Doctor that will be the proudest day of my life and yet it was at Bays very first art opening it was supposed be about Bay but John had to make it all about Daphne it was like he did not even hint that he was Proud of Bay im not saying that he did not Love Bay i am sure he did but i just don t think he showed it very much and that is why i always felt bad for Bay on the show if you ask me well i hope you all Enjoy reading this blog post Thank you so much for reading this may God continue to Bless you all again this is just my Opinion that is all well Thanks again for reading stay safe Thanks Again for reading it means a lot, 

[lilygrants]

 This is a ficbit based on @im-fairly-whitty‘s  “Whatever It Takes,” a Coco villain AU where Hector is a villain, Imelda is the great woman behind the great man, everything is made up and the points don’t matter.

Please note that situations in this fic trend more adult than content written by the originator of this AU. While nothing is described, married couples do what married couples will do, and deal with subsequent consequences. I wouldn’t rate this R, but Parental Supervision is advised.

The wonky formatting is due to using the read more cut. Since I care about your scrolling hand, please note that if you click the link, the wonky formatting will disappear and you can read it normally on the blog proper. I don’t understand it either.

“You came home to us,” she tells him. “That’s all that matters.”

Blaming her husband is out of the question. She holds him close, his head on her chest, and strokes his hair. She thanks God and all the saints that if he has to suffer like this, at least he doesn’t wake up screaming. Lying to Coco would shatter him permanently, and she is grateful, so grateful every day that she married a man who loves her and her child so entirely that he would do anything to be with them. She is so grateful that she married a man who would do anything for them, yes, but she hates herself because she loves him more for how much it’s killing him.

“You came home to us,” she croons, over and over again, safe in their marriage bed. “That’s all that matters. I love you so much.”

He doesn’t wake up screaming because he’s too horrified by what he’s done to even scream. She married a man who loves his wife and child above all else, yes, but she also married a good man. A gentle man, kindhearted and tender and loving. If he enjoyed killing Ernesto, if it thrilled him, if it gave him any feeling other than grief and self-loathing and morbid relief that it wasn’t his own lonely bones baiting the scavengers from a desolate shallow grave-- she would take their daughter and leave. Get so far away from him that he would want to kill her, too.

“I love you so much,” she repeats, breathy, soft, nuzzling his temple. For not putting her in that position, wife of a monster, and for not putting her in the other position, widow of a weak-willed good-for-nothing.

Imelda strokes the hollowed cheeks, the prematurely graying hair of her husband.

“Even if you desperately need to shave, I love you,” she adds, and the weak, involuntary laugh at the absurdity of her little joke -- they have so many more important things weighing on them -- gives her hope.

She repeats her mantra, You came home to us; that’s all that matters, as his arms tighten around her waist. He hides his face against her bosom, even though it’s a new moon and their bedroom windows are locked and the curtains are closed.

They can weather the aftershocks of this. Imelda reminds herself, this is proof, if ever she needed it, that Héctor could never do such a thing to her. Because she loved him too well, she could never imagine hurting him. Could never imagine taking such a loving, doting, protective father away from her child, could never imagine living, breathing, or loving without him there beside her.

She could never do anything to hurt him, could never betray the depths of the love that gave him the courage and the deftness to do whatever it took. And if she couldn’t, neither could he.

“I love you so much,” she says, taking her strength from the certainty of his love. “You came home to us. That is all that matters to me.”

“Our family is all that matters,” he says, muffled, soft, and she wraps her arms around him.

If they can weather this, they can weather anything, she reasons. She wishes it didn’t prey on his mind so, she wishes he could have peace, but she feels relieved, too. Relieved that the trauma, the shock and the horror, didn’t change him. That he is still  Héctor, that the same gentle heart still beats underneath the worn pajamas she’s mended for him a dozen times, underneath the soft skin that flushes hot and red just for her.

That his same gentle heart wasn’t stilled forever.

“I love you so much,” she murmurs, reaching down to loosen his pants. “I need you so much.”

At his soft gasp of surprise, she reminds him that he’s been away for months.

She has friends, acquaintances, who aren’t so lucky. Who didn’t get the chance to make a love-match before their parents could no longer support them alongside many younger siblings, who had to marry where and when they could, before it was too late. Some of them fall into the middle ground; they married decent men who are kind to them, who honor their partners in life even if they don’t love them as passionately, as entirely, as Héctor loves her. Some aren’t even that fortunate; trapped for a lifetime with men who get a thrill out of their pain.

Héctor hears the things his wife says to him. She needs him to believe them. If they can survive this, they can survive anything, but only if they’re together.

As close together as man and wife have ever been, she thanks God and all the saints that if Héctor has to suffer like this, at least he doesn’t have to do it alone.

She almost gets his mind off it, but Imelda doesn’t do it by herself.

She waits until she’s absolutely certain. Until she’s missed her period, until her breasts are tender, until she can hardly stand to keep house for her little family without being overwhelmed by nausea and exhaustion. She waits until Héctor asks her, point-blank, eyes dancing with hope.

“Do you understand now?” she asks him, and he nods. 

She takes a deep breath, and his arms are so tight around her. One of his hands braces the small of her back.

“I love you so much,” he whispers into her ear.

The first time they had this conversation, she was quivering in his arms. Heady, boundless joy in her heart warred with the primordial fear of what every wife knew might be the price she paid on top of her conjugal debt. 

But she would do anything for her family. She would honor the sacrifice her husband made for her sake,  and for Coco’s. She would live up to that one act of terrible, unspeakable love if it meant their family would grow, or if it meant dying in childbed. She would cast the dice if it would bring some of the spring back into her husband’s step. Plenty of women lived to bear ten children; plenty more died with nothing to show for it.

They have Coco; they have each other; already they have more blessings than Imelda can count.

Santa Maria, she thinks, wrapping her arms around his neck, Pray for me.

It is a gamble. It is always a gamble, but the stakes are so much higher now. If she succeeds, Héctor will be so much happier. He cherishes Coco, now more than ever. The greatest part of his energy goes to keeping her happy and safe and comfortable; if Imelda can only multiply the mental resources he needs to spend in that direction, he’ll no longer have time to see Ernesto de la Cruz’s death throes every time he closes his eyes.

But if she fails, Imelda almost can’t bear to imagine the prospects. In the best case, Héctor is devastated, alone with Coco and a new baby; in the worst, Héctor is alone with Coco and his thoughts. The idea of leaving Coco and Héctor without a mother and wife to take care of them is terrifying; she can’t protect them from the other side of the veil. She can’t do anything for her family if she can’t be with them.

Santa Maria, pray for me. Hers isn’t the most humble supplication. Tell your Son to preserve us for my husband’s sake. Make me the partner my husband needs in life, make me worthy of how deeply he loves our family, make me strong enough to do what our family needs me to do, whether it’s surviving childbirth or killing someone who might threaten us.

When Imelda has the privilege of presenting her husband with beautiful, lively, newborn twins, she tells him again. 

“You came home to us. That’s all that matters.”

Coco is sound asleep on Papá’s lap, worn out with the day’s excitement; the midwife has gone home for the same reason. 

Héctor leans close to kiss both babies in her arms, and nods.

“If you hadn’t, we wouldn’t have been blessed like this,” Imelda says, driving the point home. “If you hadn’t poured that drink into his own shot glass, if you’d let him do what he wanted to do, we wouldn’t have these children.”

“I love you both so much,” says Héctor, determined that each baby get a perfectly equal share of his affection. The tips of his fingers easily span their little cheeks, and he gently cups both of their tiny faces.

“Two lives for the price of one,” he adds quietly, thoughtfully. His eyes lift to hers, considering.

“Three,” Imelda corrects, not surprised his selflessness disregarded the life Ernesto de la Cruz actually intended to end. “More, if we have other children after this.”

More still, she thinks, if these children and those children have children of their own.

“We’ll get right to work on that,” he jokes.

Three cherubic faces and  kisses from their proud father keep her from imagining Ernesto de la Cruz’s death throes when she closes her eyes.

“You can’t tell me he matters that much to you anymore,” she says. Not compared to how much they’ve gained. Not compared to what they could have lost.

“Our family is all that matters,” he answers.

She loves him so much.

Imelda thanks God and all the saints that if Ernesto de la Cruz had to suffer, at least it was worth it.

[thelifeoftiger]

November 11, 2021.

Hello. My name is Tiger and I’m a compulsive gambler. A little background about myself, I don’t wanna brag about how perfect my life was and how I ruined it. I have a loving wife named Marie As we were madly in love and we had a fairytale relationship of almost 5 years so far. I popped the question for her to be my girlfriend on March 16,2017 and I popped the question for her to be my wife on February 29, 2020. Marie has the sweetest heart and Im so lucky to have her in my life and for her to be my wife is such a blessing. she always was there for me no matter what it was she was there she was the best life partner you could ask for honestly. She was gods gift. Shout out to her cousin Sarah for getting her a job at the same place we both worked out and everything else was history. As good as this fairytale of my life was I ruined it. I have been a struggling compulsive gambler for about 6 years. I started this addiction without even noticing it when I became 18 years old. As much as it sounded like I had everything and everything what people would’ve wanted I threw it away because of my addiction. It has gotten progressively worse to the point where I ruined a lot of relationships in the process. I became a pathological lier, I became a thief and I didn’t care about anybody who loved me. Out of all the people I hurt the one who I loved the most and the person who loved me the most, my wife Marie. So it has gotten to a point where we had to separate which doesn’t mean divorce thank god that my life isn’t entirely over but this does mean at the moment, she doesn’t want anything to do with me and I completely understand I hurt her so much and I’ve became this toxic endless cycle of mess that she’s been trying to Keep and hold and has given me so many chances to change during our relationship. Here I am. The same addicted compulsive gambler with no change in me ever since I went to rehab on December 1,2020. Here I am now, this is my rock bottom this is honestly the lowest point in my life where I feel lonely and alone in this fighting myself, feeling like I have nothing. I decided that I should make a little blog and diary of my progress through this and for me to just let everything out and not hold anything in. This happened 2 days ago and during these two days I just was contemplating on life and deciding what to do and yet I went to go gamble again and really thought while I was doing this, “Do I really want this to be my life” is what I told myself. It was at this point where I am done. I’m tired of it. I’m tired of it all. I’m at the point where I fucking HATE gambling. I’m going to take it day by day because if I say I’m never going to gamble again is unrealistic. This is the time that enough is enough I want to take back my fairytale life I want my life back I want the old me back. I want to change myself. So today as I am writing this as my first blog. I am done. November 11,2021 is my last bet. My last time gambling. I want my wife back. I want my dogs back. I want my moms back. I want my brother back. I want my cousins back. I want my life back. I will hopefully be writing everyday tracking my progress and my thoughts. This is the life of me. Tiger.

[jeongincore]

Shit i really liked and kinda didn’t like about Ragnarok

I recently saw ragnarok and became so rejuvenated that i brought my marvel blog back but i wanted to seriously talk about like things that i liked and really didn’t just to get shit out there. 

Things i really liked (like so much that i am obsessed)

-Thor’s new hair cut/outfit, i think its actually super suitable. Gives that sort of cool ass warrior refugee look. Plus, Chris Hemsworth is beautiful. 

-The humor, oh god it was hilarious, i’ve never laughed so genuinely and so much in my life and it made the movie so charming and relatable. It was also such a departure from The Dark World and the first Thor, which dealt with so much emotional baggage for not only just Thor, but for Loki, who basically suffered throughout both movies. 

-Hulk being an actual toddler/Bruce Banner being so fucked up and anxious because WHEN DID HE GET ON AN ALIEN PLANET. 

-”You’ve been on other planets before i assume” “Yeah, one!” “well now it’s two” 

-Valkyrie. Her entire everything gave me so much to love and adore. Tessa Thompson has stole my heart yet again. 

-TAIKA WAITITI AS KORG WAS ACTUALLY SO FUNNY

-The little tiny glimpses of Loki and Thor’s childhood, aka the snake story, get help. It really showed how much time Loki and Thor had spent together, which i assume is a lot because age in Asgardian years work differently probably? Like imagine that, Loki and Thor spending time together and being inseparable for 100 years. It showed that they were always close despite loki feeling different or alienated, which explains why its so hard for Loki to just leave thor for dead. 

-”You’ll always be the god of mischief, but you can be so much more” See that shit destroyed me. Thor acknowledges that Loki is not like him. He’s a trickster, manipulative, and selfish. But he also acknowledges that Loki is so much more than his tricks and lies, which shows so much character growth in Thor, who sees loki as more than just an asgardian prince that was raised the exact same way opposite of Thor, but as his own fucking person.

-Thor actually not being stupid and falling for Loki’s tricks, aka his magic projections of himself/his petty, stupid betrayals. Tom mentioned that Thor was evolving and that Loki was finally starting to realize that he’s the only one not growing. Scenes like the betrayal scene and the snake scene, although meant to be hilarious, point out that Thor isn’t that idiot that just was too trusting of his brother, he sees through Loki’s tricks, he’s seen them for years, and it really shows that Loki’s getting predictable with his fake deaths and betrayals, which might hint at him changing? 

-IT FIXED THE INCONSISTENCIES. The main reason i didn’t like Dark world, though i did see it as amazing for its ability to mix the emotional darkness between Loki and Thor along with the humor throughout the movie, was because it pointed Loki out to be the type of cold blooded monster that would murder his own father. I mean I’m no Loki apologist, i love the kid but he’s killed, he’s manipulated, he’s hurt everyone around him, but i doubt he could ever kill Odin, no matter how much of a shitty father he is. Also low-key hated the whole “Loki if you betray me, ill kill you” Thor bullshit. We all know thor wouldn’t be able to do that, he still hopes Loki is his brother. 

-AGAIN, THE SNAKE SCENE WAS SO FUNNY. 

-”I thought the world of you Loki.” Ouch. 

-Hulk and Val’s bromance. 

-The entire Valkyrie v. Hela scene. It was so beautiful and ethereal i actually nutted. 

-LOKI DIDN’T NEED TO COME BACK. HE DIDN’T NEED TO GO BACK TO THE SHIP WITH THOR. HE DIDN’T NEED TO GO BACK TO ASGARD. HE COULD HAVE NOT. BUT HE DID. BECAUSE SOMEWHERE IN THERE UNDER THE SELFISHNESS MAYBE HE CARES.

-Loki’s face when odin called him his son. 

-Loki’s face when Hela told him to kneel. 

-Loki refusing to let Thor go back to Asgard. “Are you serious? you can’t be thinking of going back there, that’s madness!” is that? Loki cARING? 

-Loki’s character development. 

-thor in a jean jacket and hoodie in new york. 

-Thor spilling beer everywhere. 

-Loki letting Thor take the orgy ship. 

-Jeff Goldblum. Thats it. 

-LOKIS FACE WITH THOR AND ODIN ON THE ROOF OF THE CASTLE I SCREmed AFTER ALL LOKI DID HE WAS STILL PUT THERE AS A PRINCE OF ASGARD BYE.  

-”Hello father” “OH SHIT” 

-The entire play. Loki’s rule as a benevolent god/king in which, before everyone feared him for a dictatorship militaristic form of ruling he could have, but in reality he just like ate grapes and watched plays. 

-Thor wanting to be a Valkyrie. The crowned prince of asgard, wanting to be an elite team of woman warriors. 

-VAL IS GAY AND IN TESSA THOMPSONS WORDS, HAD A GIRLFRIEND THAT SACRIFICED HERSELF TO SAVE HER. 

-Val kicking Loki’s ass. 

-THE RETURN OF THE DOUBLE BLADES OUT OF NOWHERE. 

-Loki in a suit. 

-HEIMDALL I LOVEJWIFHTGE.

-”I thought you didn’t want to talk about it” “heres the thing” 

-”Hello!” “Hi” *blasts everyone in room with giant laser guns* 

-”What are you? Thor, god of hammers?” 

-IMMIGRANT SONG. 

-”i swear i left him right here” “where? on the street? Or in that nursing home thats being torn down?” 

“I’m not a witch” “Why do you dress like one then?” 

-Loki rolling his eyes when thor is approached by fans. 

-Loki calling stephen strange a shitty sorcerer and going at him with stabby hands. 

-Confirmation of loki’s love of stabbing. 

-Confirmation that Loki is a snake, and also Thor’s favorite snake.

-Loki reciting Thor’s prayer to odin with him mY SON. 

-The avengers parallel. “He’s my brother!” “adopted.” 

-”mbLERG ITS ME” 

-”AGH LOKI!” 

-’DIRECT ME TO WHO’S ASS I HAVE TO KICK” 

-”Where? the devil’s anus?” 

-Bruce fighting evil with fireworks. Good job sweetie. 

-Bruce flopping like a fish on the bifrost. 

-Thor and his sparkles. 

-Lightning eyes. 

-Odin finALLY DYING. THANK GOD. 

-*Loki on a death trip* ‘this is a terrible idea” 

-Loki somehow reciting a spell to bring surtur back. what a weirdo. how did he know that. 

-LOKI COMING BACK. 

-im here. 

-Loki

-Brodinson. 

-Thor and Bruce’s bromance. 

-Jane not being there. I mean it makes sense she dumped him, he left her for two years chasing down infinity stones and constantly almost dying while she had no way of contacting him because Thor’s ass didn’t know how to use fucking email. Also i just really honestly never liked her character to begin with, i mean sure i love that Jane is a strong, smart woman but tbh i just wanted to Fast forward every time she was on screen. 

-The cute death wolf. 

-”THATS HOW IT FEELS!” “sorry i just really like the sport” 

-THOR ACTUALLY BEING PORTRAYED AS LESS OF A JERK WITH CACTUSES SHOVED UP HIS RECTUM AND MORE LIKE THE SWEET, CHARMING, CHARISMATIC AND SLIGHTLY ARROGANT BUT MEANS WELL MAN HE IS. 

-Val being there as a cool as member of the team rather than just the love interest of Thor. Protect her at all cost even though she probs doesn’t even need it. 

-”I’VE BEEN FALLING FOR THIRTY MINUTES” 

-Stan Lee’s cameo as the dude who cut Thor’s hair. Thank you for doing all of us a giant favor. Please do the same to Loki. 

-loki beating someone up with his horn hat. 

-Loki twirling his horn hat. 

-Loki being such a self serving, extra asshole that he came from the fucking fog screaming “YOUR SAVIOR HAS ARRIVED” 

-Bruce asking where tony was and then complaining about his tight crotch pants. 

-LOKI’S COSTUME CHANGE GOD I HATED THE OLD ONES BLESS UP. 

-Loki’s costume being mainly blue, black, and gold :-)))))))

-Loki being 100% done with everything that happens. 

-Val knocking Loki out when he makes her relive her trauma why do people ship this you go honey that was a dick move

-Thor throwing various things at Loki to make sure he’s not a mirage. 

-he’s a friend from work, something a kid from make a wish that met chris suggested, being in the film and all of the trailers. I hope that made that kid smile. 

-”In return, i wish to be granted safe passage through the anus” 

-LOKI FINALLY ACCEPTING THAT HE DIDN’T WANT THE THRONE WITHOUT A FAMILY. THAT HE’D RATHER WATCH HIS BROTHER TAKE IT AND STILL HAVE A BROTHER THAN HAVE A THRONE WITH NO ONE TO SHARE IT WITH. 

-LOKI SHOWING UP ON SCREEN DURING THOR’S CORONATION. 

-Loki being genuinely worried about and double checking if Thor really wants to bring him back to earth after what he did kill me honestly that would probably hurt less. 

-Loki’s face when thor said that going their separate ways was what Loki always wanted bc in reality that is the opposite go back. 

-Hela not being Loki’s daughter because 1) it proves that ya’ll should stop hoping that a comic soap opera about rich petty alien boys with daddy issues would be anything like classic norse mythology, and 2) when the fuck and how the fuck and why the fuck 

-Loki suggesting that he and Thor both rule over Sakaar together lmao ouch. 

-Loki just being really cute and quirky. 

-Thor being so fucking amazed by Val all the time. 

-”You’re late.” 

-”I saw you coming” “course you did.” 

-THE GUNS NAMED DES AND TROY I WANTED TO FUCKING DIE. 

What i didn’t like much; 

-Hela. I loved her character, but honestly here is where i think there might’ve been some failure despite how much i loved that movie. She seemed so out of place as a villain, and i feel like the whole related shit tried to mimic Guardians vol. 2, but honestly the fact that Thor didn’t care much about her made her feel so out of place. But i did like some parts, like how she was so disappointed about not being remembered or what her existence and disappointment did to how loki was raised. 

-Dr. Strange? Ok that was weird. It makes sense and it was funny to see him but to be honest i wasn’t into it. 

-tHE SCENE WITH VAL AND A GIRL BEING CUT. WHYWHYWHY

-tbh was not fond of frost master, don’t hate me. 

-Loki possibly taking the tesseract????? And hinting that he might turn evil again??? don’t do this to me marvel. 

-loki possibly being turned into the quirky sidekick of his brother. Loki is Thor’s equal, not his annoying little brother/wacky sidekick. I didn’t get that vibe often, but sometimes i did honestly. 

-RIP thor’s hammer. 

-ODIN BEING A PIECE OF SHIT YET AGAIN. 

-Hela’s entrance. it was so quick and like out of place i was like what wait, Loki and thor didn’t even have time to prepare or even mourn. 

-the comedy. It was its best and worst part of the movie. Sometimes it was tasteful. Other times it was too much. Thor and Loki didn’t even get to mourn for their dad who tbh was an asshole but still their dad before there was a annoying joke about kneeling. It took away from the story sometimes.

-the lack of hugging between thor and loki.

-The way they glossed over the warriors three’s death like they weren’t Thor’s closest friends and the only ones there for him when Odin tried to banish Thor to earth :-))))) I mean after all that shit he went through I’m pretty fucking sure it probably hasn’t caught up to him but ya bitch still pissed. 

-The way, Thor, who basically admitted that Loki actually meant the world to him and was the only family he had left, didn’t ask where he was after asgard exploded? Like tbh i get it, he trusts Loki, his brothers capable and strong and most of all really fucking smart, but i’d still be like :-) the fuck is Loki. I think this is a directing error though rather than like the characters fucking up but i was freaking out, i mean asgard was literally pebbles and everyone was out BUT my son. 

-No sif, i mean i get it Jaime Alexander was busy but like y'all could’ve explained smh. 

-Loki not getting a hair cut. When will his emo phase end. 

-Not getting that one flashback to 80′s asgard with mullets and emo loki. 

Overall it was pretty fucking cool, one of the best movies of the trilogy. I fell in love with the marvel cinematic universe all over again. But it wasn’t perfect. 

[diariesof-kg]

Untitled..

08_03_21

I feel like I’ll be blogging on odd days.  I’ve been in a weird emotional funk and I don’t want to blame it on my monthly, because I’ve had one since forever.  I know myself and my moods.  Especially since. I can’t indulge in any sorts of pain meds.  I think my health is declining.  I don’t know, something isn’t right.  I mean two years ago, 2019, I went through this emotional phase when they thought i had leukemia.  I definitely did not accept that.  It was bad, because I had just started dating someone and she told me to go to the doctor because i was in pain a lot.  Damn we cried together.  Sometimes I wish we worked out, but she wasn’t ready for a relationship and I respected that.  But the point is that, I tired consuming all things possible and nothing improves.  Sometimes it does and other times it doesn’t.  I remember my blood levels dropped to 100 and anything below 100 is never a good sign.  I know I am suppose to take care of myself and I do, but also I need to do God’s work.  I need to help those who can’t get help.  

The other weekend, I told myself you need to help those on skidrow.  I’ve done it over the years, and honestly they are my motivation.  I don’t need an award for that.  I do it because it’s who I am.  I am empathetic so I understand to an extend of who they are.  I just allow myself to go there.  I bought probably over 600 bottles of water from Costco and drove to DTLA from 6th to 7th street passing out water.  And the fact that these individuals asked for no cameras or pictures was shocking to me.  It’s quite sad that people go down to skidrow as if it’s a damn zoo.  As if it’s a place to drive or walk past and stare and be in awe of those who have fell into hardship not by their own faults.  I went down there with a goal to provide water, something that is sometimes scarce.  They were so grateful and it warmed my heart.  I can’t even explain the emotions.  The fact that I am going through what I am going through and yet these individuals have it worse, I was just elated to hear, “God bless you...” I want to go again before the end of summer, but this new covid, I am unsure.  I need to do 5th street and beyond.  I need more people involved, because baby my car was struggling, Lol and it is suppose to be a damn SUV.  Boy I tell you. 

I guess I am in a funk because I can’t believe the person I fell in love with did what they done to me.  And they said ALL of it is my fault.  I am like damn my ex did me worse for five years and after she apologized and provided closure.  She didn’t even reach out to my job with the fuckery.  I am confused.  I mean they are both different individuals but I guess I had expectations.  I am also in a funk, because I am in the process of getting ready to tell the world.  Part of me rather live in silent, not allow my followers, friends, associates to know.  But part of me is like, listen you forgave her but she has no remorse or care about you, so why hold back... why are you protecting her?  She goes to bed, sleeping peacefully, not giving a damn about you.  My internal thoughts are the worse, but it’s also true.  I mean everything I do, I don’t take back and it has to be fueled by pure intentions.  I don’t do anything out of anger.  Part of me does not want the attention, because I am not the victim.  I just want people to understand the circumstances of domestic violence and that it could happen to anyone close to you.  Also, the worse part of it all again is telling lies about me stealing her identity.  I need people to understand across all spectrums how dangerous this is.  I even sent a demand letter to retract the statement for the sake of my reputation.  No response.  It’s like damn, you really don’t care about me.  You mad I called the police for getting abused?  Like this is a weird child-adult.  Take accountability.  I mean this attorney is going to cost me a down payment on a Tesla, but due to the nature he is willing to move forth, but I am tired.  

This is where I am at the moment.  I haven’t typed my story yet.  I did one interview days after it happened and I am glad he did NOT post it.  Sevyn would have saw it and I literally saw Sevyn at the BET awards.  It’s sad I feel embarrassed for someone who is in the entertainment business to read about my life.  Damn I might not ever speak about it.  Because when I did the interview, I was wishing her the best and saying I still love her.  And I would have definitely looked stupid.  But now that I have healed slightly and talked to so many advocates and attorneys.  It’s a whole team of support that I did not know existed.  Plus Im in the entertainment industry I don’t want the directors, producers, etc. to be treating me funny.  I need to tell my manager what has been going on, since they keep sending me so many auditions and I just know I am not focused.  

I don’t know. I wish things didn’t happen the way they did but God showed me.  Because I asked him to.  I asked him a week prior.  And it kind of unraveled rather quickly.  I even asked spiritual z like, why and she said you drove there right and God didn’t stop you.  And I almost cried.  But God allowed her to harm me.  But he also showed me her true colors.  She was so angry she was sweating bullets.  She was so angry she grabbed me and threw me into her bathroom.  That anger has always been there.  We are the opposite, thank god.  I am grateful when I am pissed I shut down and go mute.  Or I speak my unhinged thoughts but never put my hands on anyone.  I may have to ask the universe and God how to maneuver this situation.  I’ll probably do another reading again and I’ll ask Z about it.  I don’t want to get cold feet in telling my story.  I believe it’s important.  Because at the end of the day she isn’t really apologetic and nothing is her fault. So why am I holding back. I kind of know why.  My ass cares too damn much.  

[riskeith]

you just responded and i nyoomed to answer. yes my days consist of waiting for you. yes i’m not ashamed to admit it. <3

that makes so much sense actually? like A Lot of sense. i don’t think you should feel bad about that at all i mean if you are comfortable with how you perceive them then by all means! haha! what’s fun about fanfics is that people can take one character and shape them in so many different ways. canon doesn’t anyways give us depth to characters yet writers do which 🙏🏽 godsent. but then again, it can feel weird if someone makes them behave like ~someone~ else haha. i remember it used to be a hot topic in voltron actually, where people would portray lance as a weak and emotional guy only even if he’s arguably the bravest and most bamf... people didn’t like that very much. do you know what i’m talking about?

I’M SO EXCITED TO READ ALL OF THESE. thank you so much you just set my late night weekend plans 😏. and oh god esselle is the ao3 writer. i love their bnha fics so much. can’t wait to read their haikyuu stuff as well. kagehina too... 🥺 dude, i saw some oikage things last night and i have my eyes open.. 👁 i know you like them a lot so hm... i’ll definitely read that as well i love the summary already.

he’s puppy-like so would he like to play in the water? i want to say so, just bc i think it would be cute for him to splash around 🥺

just one?? wow now i get what you meant in your earlier messages, shskdhsk. all my current friends i’ve known since we were children, i don’t even know how to make new friends irl tbh.... AND SAME!!!! CHILDHOOD FRIENDS TO LOVERS GO BRR. and god the best thing is how things change but at the same time they don’t? like they start to notice little things and realize they’ve always liked them? or the ‘i thought best friends felt like this towards each other’.... aaaaaaaah. 🥺 but then again enemies to lovers.. the tension and the yearning? the moment everything just snaps? god i couldn’t pick my favorite i don’t think. i just love those two so much equally hahah.

if it’s cyberpunk vibes i will combust. i love those aesthetics so much.. (waiting for ps5 to restock so i can run around in night city in cyberpunk 2077 forever.) but yeah it makes sense for it to be themed like that but it’s so funny to think about transporting from the whispering woods to like... large billboards and grungy streets. AR 35?? oh that’s must earlier than i expected. so i take it the main story isn’t done yet?

how sexy, even though this blog is just our messenger app at this point snskdhkddhj.. once again, i’m sorry riskeith stans.. 🙏🏽

i wish i could get you all the cotton candy in the world. and wow kenma HAIR!! sounds so cute but wait oh my god,,, do you have short hair,....... 😳💗💓💕👁💘💝💓😭💗👀💖💓💘💝💞 do you? 😳💢 how was it shaving everything? must’ve been such a big decision!! 😳

ikr? like most of the fics i’ve read portrays them as a angst ship which i do love a lot but you’re right it’s funny bc in canon they’re just.. supportive idiots. i think it’s the oikawa fangirls thing and iwa being annoyed by it that people get hooked on. at least i think since it’s almost always there in the fics... :+ DO YOU LIKE IT? i’m so obsessed with it i saw a edit on ig with klance and that song earlier and it fits them so well too... 🥺 anyway back to iwaoi, i think i like writing from iwa’s pov actually? i haven’t tried writing much from oikawa’s yet but idk.,, iwa’s personality just speaks to me. also i like that oikawa’s personality is so complex to understand, it’s easier to spice up the angst that way. (I DON’T 🥺 it’s such a sad topic for me bc it’s my ultimate dream to drive but it costs soo much money to get it here and i’ve been too busy to invest... 😭 wbu?????) I KNOW MEMO AND OH MY GODNESS? i’m sure the fic is sooo good oh god.... the vibes. 😭 please tell me what it’s about. please. 🙇🏽‍♀️

OH it means that i’m just gonna reread your fics until you post something new... here i thought i was being clever and cute shshskdhdks

STOP YOU KEEP MAKING ME SO EXCITED aaaa ma’am please... think about my heart. 🥺

here’s a new topic to discuss; are you a coffee or tea person? (or neither.. please don’t say so)

kiss, m.a. 💘

i keep forgetting to check whether you’ve responded or not before shutting down my laptop and i’m left to answer on my phone 😭😭 and i too spend my days awaiting your responses <333 but i always forget to check after a period of time HFJSKFKSKCKNC i swear i’m checking like once every 5 min but the moment i forget you respond NCKSNDN

bro (do you mind being called stuff like that lol) writers give us everything canon is too cowardly to give.… truly blessed 🙏🙏 yeah i do!! there are a lot of complaints about mischaracterisation in hq fandom too actually… which i think is fair enough but at the end of the day just let these people have their fun you know.. it’s not harming anyone and if you don’t like it just don’t read! lol

i haven’t read much of esselle’s bnha actually (aside from tdbk) but i just know they’re absolutely amazing!!!!!! absolute legend i hope (i know you will tho hehe) you enjoy her kagehina toooo. and yes oikage!!!!!! omg pls 😭😭😭 i wish they were more popular aaaa

🥺🥺🥺 razor in one of those baby pools.. RAZOR WITH POOL FLOATIES!!! my goodness 😭😭😭😭

fjksnxksndm yeah but i think i might be an outlier in that… LOL oops. and you’re so right like they just grew up together and like grew in love it’s so natural and just comes to them like they were always supposed to be together and they are <333 bc soulmates <33333 BUT YEAHHH THE MOMENT EVERYTHING SNAPS YOU KNOW IT!!!!! god when person A SAVES person B even tho they’ve “hated” them the entire time...… but when they were faced with a tough circumstance they realised they couldn’t bear the thought of being without them 😩😩👌👌👌👌👌👌

omg ps5.… ngl i considered buying a ps console so i could play the last of us 2 chxjjskskxjxjs. have you seen all the cyberpunk memes tho? lolol. nah main story isn’t done!! i think the main story is supposed to develop all 7 worlds until we find our sibling so like.… it ain’t gonna be over for a LONGGGG time (lol omg could you imagine if mih*y* pulled a me and like 4 worlds in was just ‘ok soz i’m uninterested now you can imagine how the game would’ve gone’ HFJSJFKSKFKDJ)

HAHAHAHHA it legitimately is. riskeith who??? more like marriage anon stan account. fjdkfnnd anyways to my other followers hope y’all are enjoying the show 🤪

i do have short hair rn!!! lowkey a bowl cut but i’m also trynna grow out a mullet djksndksnd. and having a shaved head was so nice.. i literally just couldn’t stop touching it after cjskckksnfks. and it wasn’t that big of a decision to me tbh i’m not that fussed about my hair like i know some other people are djskkd the biggest obstacle was getting my parents to agree 💀💀💀 (much like i am trying now..…) i used to have my hair long for ballet, but once i quit i just kept getting it cut shorter and shorter and then voila! shave. GJDJKSKDND

true.. jealous iwa.. i have that in one of my wips i believe FJSJJCKSKDK (it might even be in the memo fic?) AND UHHHH i didn’t love the song ;–; it’s just… slow HFKALDLAKDK and not the mood i was in when i heard it cjdkslxllskcjskcnkscnkzmxmcm omg no not klance 😭😭 they have a lot of angst too.. (i say, as if there isn’t a single klance fic of mine that doesn’t have angst JFJDJSKDJ) OMG YOU LIKE WRITING IWA POV TOO???? you 🤝 me iwa kin. i joke that it’s because i, much like him, am very much in love with oikawa. (aw no i’m so sorry for bringing it up 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 but i’m on my learner’s rn!) IVE POSTED THE OUTLINE ONCE (not a good sign… LMAO) https://kaheyama.tumblr.com/post/190015338287/yall-want-some-iwaoi-angst THERE!! also wait i just realised it has manga spoilers.… maybe don’t look fjdknfjd (you could stop after “pining iwaizumi hajime” but i don’t want to accidentally spoil you 😭😭)

JFKSKSLAKFKSKCJLSKD IM so sorry it WAS clever and cute my brain was just not big enough at the moment to understand 😭😭😭😭😭 but thank u as always i appreciate 💗💗💗💗💗💗💗 so honoured you would even think about going back to them lord knows i don’t KFKSJSKA

HEHEHE NO MERCY!!! but ok ok i shall lay low until the day comes 😋😋😋

tea!! simply bc i can’t sleep if i drink coffee fjskfjsj. but that’s been happening with tea too so i haven’t even had tea recently 😭😭😭😭😭 flavour wise i think i like coffee more but also you get so much more variety with tea? hm. HAHA. hbu??

hugssss, c.r. 💝

[agrestenoir]

things i’m thankful for

so I know that thanksgiving has passed for me, but there were a few shoutouts I wanted to give to certain people who mean a lot to me, and I couldn’t go long without saying something. So here’s just a short list of some people I really appreciate.

To @agermanshepherdpatronus and @thatcrazybookwyrm: you guys mean the absolute world to me. You’ve been with me through thick and thin and are some of the best friends I could ever ask for. I know I’ve been MIA for the last couple of months as life picks up, but it’s thanks to you guys that I am where I am today. You’re so important to me, and I hope you know that. I wouldn’t be who I am today without you. You two have changed my life forever, so now you’re gonna be stuck with me till the end, okay? I hope you get all the wonder and happiness you deserve because you guys have given me the world, and I want to give it you in return. Never change, and keep those hearts of gold always shining. I love you, Oz & MG. <3

To @nebulousrose (Honnah): I know you deactivated, baby, but you’re still a star in my sky, and I hope you know that. I always look back on our messages we’ve shared over the years and I hope you know how much you mean to me. At one point in time, you were the only person who could make me smile, and you always saw the best in me. Someday I hope I can become the person you always believed I was. <3 Love you, darling. I’ll see you on Facebook and Snapchat if I ever get my ass on there and be active.

To @perfectlyrose and @dimensionhoppingrose and @nottheopera and @skyler10fic and @tinyconfusion and @chocolatequeennk and SO MANY OTHER blogs and content creators. [This is Erin/atimelordswife, I just realized I posted this on the wrong blog]. I’ve followed a lot of you for years, and you’re all so wonderful and ridiculously talented. It’s been an absolute privilege to watch you all grow. And I KNOW there’s a bunch of people I’m forgetting because you fuckers keep changing your URLs and I can’t keep up. I’m a 22 year old college student in a long term relationship with her coffee cup, so please please bear with me. Regardless, I love you all and thank you for blessing me with your content and wonderful blogs. 

To @breeeliss: You’re too wonderful for words, and I am so happy I met you! You’re so accepting of me and so encouraging and supportive. You’re also god-spanking talented, like I can’t sometimes because I’m in awe of your skills? You’re one of the people I go to when I need to smile because you’re so fucking hilarious, and you’re so entertaining and fun to talk to. Like I’m so blessed that we’re friends? Thanks for putting up with me, Gabie <3 

To @stardusted: You’re another person I’m so happy I got to know. You keep me on my toes and always make me laugh. You are such a wonderful person and friend, and I am so appreciative of you. Also I know you’re gonna make it big someday with your raw talent and the passion you put in everything you do. You’re one of the best people I know, and I just want the best for you <3 Thanks for putting up with me too, darling! I know I can be a handful.

To @flusteredkeith: You are one of the coolest people I’ve ever met. You are always there to listen to me scream and your fics hurt me in such a good way. As a person, you always make me smile, and I love talking to you. The heart you put into your work and thoughts always shines through. You make me fall in love with things [Sheith], which is a very powerful tool. I just love your gusto for the things you love. You’re also so fucking supportive and there for me when I need it, and I just love, love talking to you. I’m so glad I know you, J <3 Thanks for everything!!!

To @miraculousstorytelling: CLAIRE, MY PASTRY, MY EASY-BAKE OVEN. You keep me on my toes, you make me laugh, your zest for life and your kindness and heart are just some of the most amazing things about you. I love your compliment wars, I love your writing because dear GOD do you have a tendency to break me, I love your passion and effort that you put into things. And your passion for people and you’re just... I love everything about you, Pastry Puff, and please never change. You’re always there for me, you’re so encouraging and I’m so grateful for everything you’ve ever done for me. You deserve the world, babe. <3 Thank you.

To @panda013: PANDABEAR. You are one of the most talented people I know, you’re so good at everything you do, like it’s not fair how good you are. You’re so hard working and your strength is a thing of beauty. I admire you in everything you do, how you approach life, and I know things can be rough at times, but I always know you’re gonna pull through and be wonderful. You’re destined for amazing things, Panda. I believe in you so much, and thank you for always being there for me <3 People like you give me a reason to smile!

To @ladyserendipitous: My muse, the story voice, O, the Mom of the Server. You are literally the voice of reason sometimes, and I hope you know how appreciative I am of you. You always make the best comments and are fucking hilarious, but you are also the realist I need to be because I have a tendency to be jump off walls a lot. You’re an anchor to a lot of people, and I really admire you. Plus you’re like super good at writing, and I love your work, and more people need to read them. Thank you for always being there, for having the best ideas, and just being awesome in general. I aspire to reach your level someday!

To @megatraven: You are the epitome of sunshine on a rainy day, the gold at the end of the rainbow, the world does not deserve you. You are literally the kindest person I have ever met, the most supportive and encouraging, and even though you can be a walking shitpost of your icons sometimes, all it does is make me throw my head back in laughter. You deserve the whole world, you deserve all the happiness. From treadmills to bees, from Melon Rodeo to Meggi, you are a shooting star. I love you, I adore you, thank you for everything <3 ALSO YOUR FUCKING WRITING KILL SME THANK YOU.

To @sadrien: What can I say about this incredibly talented person? Your stories give me life, your IRL stories give me life, you’re incredibly awesome in general. You’re so wonderful and kind, and I am so happy I met you. I wish you only the best because you deserve all of it, and just thank you so much for the laughter? The kindness because I don’t think you have a mean bone in your body? I just want you to know how much I love and appreciate you, Tea, and keep being wonderful because the world needs more people like you! <3 Thanks for putting up with my dramatic ass.

To @zoenightstars: I know you don’t use Tumblr, but for when you ever come online and hopefully see this, just know that I love and appreciate you. Your passion for the things you do, your talent that knows no bounds, your smarts and snarkiness are things I struggle to keep up with. I know college applications are draining, but I firmly believe that you’re gonna go on to do great things. You’ve got the passion and the drive and will to go far, and I can’t wait to see where life takes you. Thanks for always being there to make me smile!

To @ninoirs: you are a bubbly, accident-prone smol that we all must protect. Literally, I don’t know how you’ve made it almost eighteen years. But like they say, the best things come in small packages, and Rey, you’re a blessing, honestly. Ridiculously talented, so bright and brilliant, and just so amazing at everything you do. You’re so supportive, so much fun, and thank you for putting up with me. You’re honestly so wonderful, Rey Rey. (And your boyfriend is cool too). 

To @amillionsmiles: I literally just started to get to know you, but you’re still incredibly talented. Also it’s kind of scary how good you are. I have always been a fan, and you fucking slay me with everything you do. You’re gonna do great things, I firmly believe that. Thanks for always breaking my heart and putting it back together <3

To @adribug: You’re too smart for words, too brilliant to measure, and your graphics fucking kill me, so thanks for that. You’re just a bubbly person, and your personality shines in everything you do. I love talking to you, you’re so much fun. Thank you for being awesome, thanks for dealing with me, and thanks for just being yourself. You’re amazing, and I know you’re gonna do awesome things <3

To @larvesta: the lady who can sometimes be my twin and who is so fucking talented that her art has legit made me cry. You are one of those people I couldn’t have been happier to meet, and you are so fucking amazing. Your talent knows no bounds, your kindness has no measure, and you are just so... ASKSDGHLGD That’s all I can say, Liv. Thank you for putting up with me, for your endless support, and for being so incredible. I love you ;3

To @miracujess: you’re a walking meme and shitpost. Like I can’t with you, Jess??? You’re fucking hilarious, so incredible, so entertaining and fun. Like I can depend on you to put a smile on my face when I need it, and to be so genuinely awesome that you make me cry. Thank you so much for everything. The world deserves more people like you who are the embodiment of sunshine. 

To everyone else at @mlfanfiction: you guys have become my second family, literally. You’re all so supportive and wonderful and fucking awesome. Thank you for putting up with me, for being there for me, for the support and encouragement. For being so talented and giving me people to look up too. To Erica, Teal, Rae, KC, Kiwi, Sarah, Maha (I can’t fucking remember your TUMBLR URLS SO IM GONNA GET YOU ALL IN VERSION 2.0; I’m sorry it’s literally 10:30 PM at night. I can’t be on top of everything now, especially when I’m on break from school). You guys are so fucking talented and I weep tears when I talk to you or read your stuff. Thanks for the laughs, for the snarks, for the kindness, for making the good days the absolute best. <3 

To everyone at @queermiraculous: thanks for giving me a place I can be myself. Thank you to all the people I’ve met, all the friends I’ve made, I’m too tired to list you cause there’s a fuck ton. You’re all so supportive and encouraging and fun, and I just wish you the best.

To everyone at the MLArtist server that @larvesta runs: You guys are so talented, so supportive and so encouraging. Thank you for giving me a place to learn and grow as an artist, and just for being some of the best people I’ve ever met.

To everyone I didn’t mention, thank you! If I’ve talked to you even once, you belong on this. But I’m a 22 year old college student married to her coffee cup, it’s 10:30 PM, and I’ve gone 26 hours without sleep. Please bear with me. Just thank you for everything, your support and encouragement, acceptance, talent, your passion, your strength, just everything. You all mean the world to me, and I can’t thank you enough.

Just thank you all my followers as well. <3 I don’t know how you got here, but you deserve so much. Thanks for putting up with me. <3

[edmartinsta]

Nice To Think I’m Still On Here

Woah has life changed since this. Tumblr is my first place I ever published anything and posted anything before Facebook and Twitter were even a thing for me. I cant tell you how excited I am to know that from here on out I can log in and continue something special to my heart. My posts are a little here and there so I hope I dont scare you away or weird you out or make it boring. From this moment I’ll try to continue my content through here where I know only one person will actually know to find me and no one else haha. To those that may not know me so well I used to be a music blog where I would talk about so much stuff until I realized I wanted to make a website. This was more of a private thing and actually more public than it is now with Tumblr’s popularity back in 2010ish when everyone I thought was cool owned a Tumblr. I guess I can’t blame them I left for a long time this and fell off hard even though I probably could have done something pretty cool with it by now or used it to help me on my other things. 

Little update: I left high school in 2013 so not much after the music posts I remember stopping this and maybe continuing it here and there, After there I went to community college where I ended up making lost of memories which im sure I’ll have plenty of time reminiscing with you guys, I then moved to Chicago to follow my dreams as a designer and stayed out there for about four years. Was amazing and could have been better if I planned better and actually could get a job out there that was laidback as I was a pretty tardy asshole to my employers. I wasnt late by hours but I was late often and if that didnt get me fired I would simply quit and never show my face there again. It was a mess, I was a mess, everything was fucked up but everything was also new and fascinating. I dont regret any of it. Now its been years since college and sadly I never finished with a semester remaining. That was a terrible day for my mother I could see she wanted to yell and cry because I told her I got expelled basically from art school for flunking. Man that was a terrible situation I tried to tell people I really tried my best was just a reckless kid who could never get any sleep and was always thinking of what to do and not doing the stuff. Ugh I get upset just thinking about it. So much time wasted. But I suppose I at least realize it now....also that I still dont regret it, it shapes us these failures. im 25 now and soon to be 26 and honestly I’m scared shitless. I feel like i never saved anything, never built credit, havent gone on a date in years, havent gone to eat with friends more than five times in six years, have broken almost everything I own in some sort of way. i dont eat correctly all the time, i dont exercise to keep the figure i used to have less than two years ago. I started college senior year of high school and somehow still screwed up the process and fell behind over and over again and even got screwed by the education system and now have tons of debt which im barely getting out of because of my amazing mom who is also the most toxic person in my life. Man........i know I look bad i know i suck.....im not perfect in any way.....I lost my way..........I know my way back and what I gotta do but........that time ill never get back. Ive never had a stable job in my life for god sake. Ugh I hope I dont come off as a failure I feel it completely but I dont want to be one. I have done so much in my life and met amazing people that honestly makes it all worth something but damn my heart........I don’t want to blame anyone but myself. My parents werent the best educated and still scares me to think I was so alone when I was younger that even my parents only talked to me to put me down and still kinda do but now we can carry a conversation and bond a smidge...im 25......

This quickly turned into something more than just a update I got caught up. But I want to take this extra step in my life to document on here most of my thoughts and things as I used to back before high school culture was no more for me. To Christina.....if you read this at all...just know the only thing over the past couple years on my mind has been you if not my purpose in this life..my life....has been nothing short of terrible since we last talked and yeah I had a ton of good luck too and am blessed to say the least but the man I said I wanted to become just hasnt happened yet. I let myself go for a bit...but now I want to show the world and you...that the past couple years didnt just happen for nothing....there is so much, so fucking much I got planned and been planning for that I just hope you see why it took so long. My time will come..and maybe one day we can talk and laugh about all this because you were one of the most memorable people ever to cross paths with and even though we barely text each other anymore I hope one day we can be good friends again. Im sure we all been so busy surviving. 

To those who got this far I really didnt expect anyone to finish this. It was a huge ramble. But I hope you can see I came a bit moody into the post but also with hope and excitement that Tumblr will be my home again for getting away from social media. Its been almost two years since I posted on Facebook and I dont use instagram as much anymore so ill be on here :D message me if anyone wants to be friends or anyone who may relate heck anyone who thinks they wanna be friends haha penpals that maybe have art side to them too??? hahah okay thats all bye everyone <3