#idk i guess i just wish things could be different

[c00kieguy]

Transfem Aventurine

relationships: - summary: I think the title is self explanatory lol cw: spoilers for 2.2 quest at the end. using she/her for Aventurine. Angst. Self hate, but tbh that's standard with Aventurine. Also a bit of Argenti at the end bc I love him and must squeeze him into every scenario possible. a/n: Since it's pride month, here's me transing one of my favorite characters! I guess this could be sorta considered an Aventurine character study...? idk. Got way longer than I expected tho oop wc: ~1k

Kakavasha who admired her sister more than anything else in her entire life. She was the pillar she leaned on whenever things got rough, she meant everything and more to her.

Her sister was just the most beautiful girl she ever knew, so of course she wanted to be exactly like her!

She'd grow her hair out as much as possible but every time it reached past her shoulders she was told to cut it.

"But I wanna be as beautiful as you, big sis!" but that usually led to an argument, and little Kakavasha hated fighting with her sister.

It annoyed her a lot but she listened to her big sis nonetheless.

-----

Aventurine who was given anything and everything when she joined the IPC. Riches and robes and authority, you name it, but none of that mattered, not when these were just new shackles she was forced to don

When she first returned to her new room she was taken back by just everything

Not only was her new wardrobe filled to the brim with fancy clothes but so many expensive products and many other items she could only dream of having before.

She didn't want to feel happy, not when these things costed her her freedom, but it was price she had already paid so was there any harm in enjoying it a little?

Aventurine who gets increasingly more frustrated when scourging through her wardrobe. suit, suit, suit, more suits.

It was only when she went though the nightwear section that she stumbles upon a single nightgown.

A humble shade of light blue covered it entirely. A very simple gown that had a few frills around the chest, arms and plenty around the bottom. There was even a cute little bow right below the neckline.

The material was smooth to the touch, almost definitely silk.

Aventurine couldn't believe her luck. Not a single dress to be seen and yet there was just one, one that she loved more than anything. One that was almost waiting for her to pick it up and put it on.

So put it on she did.

The soft fabric felt incredible on her, and for the first time she finds herself feeling beautiful in her own skin.

Of course, with a new dress, it was mandatory for her to do a little spin and watch the hems of the gown flare out like a blooming flower.

"At least...I can have this." She thought to herself, a small smile already on her lips.

That when she spots the various makeup products in front of the mirror. What's the harm in a bit more fun, right?

Excitedly she sits down in front of the mirror, hand already reaching for the lipstick in front of her. Aventurine remembers seeing quite a few rich women wear these, mainly in bright maroon colors so she picks a similar shade. To think she'd get the chance to try it too, she couldn't be more thrilled. I wish big sis was here. She thought to herself. I'm sure we'd have a lot of fun playing with these.

Carefully opening the cap she rotates the base to reveal the deep red wax. But when she looks to the mirror to guide her on putting it on she freezes.

Big sis? No...it was her own reflection. This having been the first time Aventurine had seen herself in years it was shocking just how similar she looked to her sister. Long tousled blonde hair sticking up in odd places, never having been taken care of during the entirety of her period of captivity. And those vivid bright eyes, how could she forget? The sight had been burnt into the back of her head after all, the very day her sister had been taken away from her she didn't look much different.

Immediately dropping the lipstick she snatches the scissors from the dressing table and holds it to her neck. Her hair had grown far past her shoulders, her sister would surely scold her, no? Relaxing her grip a little, Aventurine takes one last look in the mirror before closer her eyes and starting to snip away at her locks in frustration.

The scissors were haphazardly thrown on the floor which was now covered in tuffs of dirty blonde hair. Aventurine laid naked on the bed, the gown long been abandoned in the trash can. Choppy hair flares out around her head as she stared at the ceiling with a dead look in her eyes. The moment of joy was short lived and left her feeling even more disgusted by her own figure.

I guess...I can't have this either.

Aventurine now dresses the way she's expected to. While it pained her to throw away this side of herself, it pained her even more seeing her sister in herself everyday. The constant painful reminder of what she had lost would surely drive her to insanity.

Aventurine who now has one more reason to sacrifice herself in Penacony in the name of carrying out her duties for the IPC.

Aventurine who's Just. So. Tired.

-----

"Are you alright?" A concerned voice calls out. Aventurine lifts up her head to see an iron clad hand reach out to her. Looking further she notices the rose themes knight armor and the vibrant red hair. Who is this guy...?

"To think I'd find a beautiful young lady such as yourself in this forsaken place. Please, allow me to lend you my aid." The strange knight says.

"Beautiful young lady, huh...." She scoff to herself. She was far from that in her eyes.

"Indeed! Your beauty shines even in these dire circumstances, like a radiant star in the darkest of nights." Aventurine is a little taken back at this, the knight seems to have assumed she was talking about the 'beautiful' part but she doesn't bring it up. Graciously she accepts his help.

-----

Argenti mentions a beautiful young lady from the IPC akin to a peacock to the trailblazer and Firefly but it just confuses them. Sure, Aventurine fit the description of a peacock and he's also from the IPC, but a lady? They're both deeply concerned at the prospect of there being another stoneheart in Penacony.

-----

Aventurine lying in her bed after being rescued, wondering what she should do next. She certainly wanted to live, that's for sure. But maybe there's someone she could talk to about this.

Ultimately though, she decides not to. The IPC cannot be trusted, and she was just oh so tired of everything, all she wanted to do was to escape now and perhaps start on a clean slate. The current chapter of her life was one she was more than eager to close, but it seemed the universe (or rather, the IPC and a certain Galaxy Ranger) had different plans.

a/n: I think, Argenti is the kinda guy who can tell you're trans even before you realize it lol.

[scotty-nobody]

It's another rough one tonight lads

[oscill4te]

I hate how im almost never into the ppl who are into me

[piplupod]

it is all just so sucks

[476b]

.

[eggmeralda]

can never describe enough how excited I am for the inevitable 2010s revival of the future

(also this turned into a massive ramble accidentally?)

[musical-chick-13]

I’m serious, if you insist on going with “It was mental illness all along!!!” as a Twist™ or reveal in a mystery/horror/etc. piece, you need to write at least 5 more things where that’s not the case and you treat your mentally ill characters with respect to offset it, no more laziness, you wanna use this ableist trope you gotta pay in blood, sweat, and tears.

[orcelito]

As a certified Akechi lover i probably should have more love for Legato. But it is just not the same.

Probably the level of cruelty involved + the fact that Akechi's ultimately a kid with a vendetta & too much power whereas Legato is someone who had no will to live so he filled that hole with the will of someone actively pursuing genocide.

Fantastic antagonist! Compelling narrative purpose! I love Legato as a character. I still want to drop kick him anytime I see him.

[dellinah]

I recently lost my best friend to cancer, and words cannot describe how incredibly painful every waking hour has been since I got the news.

They say time heals all, and I can only hope that the memories that suffocate me now will soon become nostalgic treasures that will soothe my longing.

Right now, it fucking hurts tho

And grief is just a weird feeling. It's trying to face a reality that you cannot comprehend, much less accept; but it forces itself onto you regardless, bc there's no way back.

No way out.

This how it is now.

But really, in trying to process this new reality, it has dawned upon me just how... weird, it is.

Just how weird it all feels to me.

I still know his birthday by heart.

And when it comes around, I know I will think of what gift I should get him for a second - before remembering he's gone, and crying all over again over a wound that never truly healed.

I still know his favorite shows, and I know that he collected funko pops of them. There's a list on my phone with the ones he already had, so that I knew to look for new ones when shopping around.

The messages we sent are still on my phone. Still among the most recent ones, for now.

And when I click on them, the last words we ever exchanged (and will ever exchange) stare back at me. Just like they're any other ordinary message, unaware of the massive weight they carry to me.

As does his profile picture, a frozen image of what he will forever look like in my mind.

Spared the burden and the blessing of aging beyond his mid twenties.

The audio messages are still there, too.

His voice still calls me, by name, every time I hit play. Like an echo of what once was, a voice I will never hear again in this lifetime.

But the recordings remain.

And it hurts me so, so bad.

Yet, I play it over and over again.

Maybe hoping the words will be different at one point, like he's just recorded something new.

But by now, I know each audio by heart.

Over and over and over again.

I still know by heart all of the inside jokes that only he and I knew. And now, I have no one else to tell them to.

When I see a pair of blue pants, or finding nemo merch, or a news reporter wearing yellow; I'll have to keep it to myself from now on.

Because no one else in the world gets why that is funny to me.

Or why it was funny to us.

It's just, I didn't expect everything to vanish when you did.

But I didn't expect just how much what you left behind would hurt.

Your birthday. Our inside jokes. The recipe we always made together. The road where we'd drive at night almost every weekend. The shows we watched together that you'll never see the end of. The path we walked home after school as teens. Your favorite color. The book I borrowed and never gave back.

You are gone, but so much of you remains with me.

It's like a letter adressed to an empty house.

What do I do with it all now?

[bibleofficial]

idk what my father thought the take-away would be by taking my brother & i downtown to look at homeless people every holiday and birthday growing up was. like all it’s turned into was ‘communism = good’ & 🤝 like 😭😭

[oscill4te]

there comes great pleasure with being an annoying unbearable vegan im sorry. im bad at it bc im always like "nuance tho" but it's fun to at least pretend im a preachy stereotype

[spaceradars]

i’m literally so envious of people who enjoy making food like !!!!!!! i wish that was me and i hope someday it will be me 🥲😤

[a-passing-storm]

Fuck billionaires but man sometimes I wish I were a billionaire so that I could like... build a city and pay environmentalists to figure out the best place to build a city and pay a bunch of local people in various areas to figure out where a city is as noninvasive as possible and figure out how to make it the most energy efficient city possible and make really good use of vertical space to avoid Sprawl and make sure to use sustainably sourced materials and have it be a thing where you can Own your apartment so that you can feel comfortable painting the walls and changing stuff without needing permission from a landlord but it’s still a vertical space and like... also make really efficient use of every waste product of the city and like... there are so many factors to consider but I wish I had the money and time to consult people that know what they’re doing and consider all the factors. 

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

[jlf23tumble]

saw another absurd receipt anon that's been going around surrounding AOTV and I swear to god why does people post these kind of things and the fact that it's so detailed and indepth, also insider info, it's so fake and I don't get why people bother to post them, why, for clout?? Receipts like those always causes hysteria and endless discussions, it's dumb tbh

anon 2: jen have you seen the anon who’s apparently watched aotv? i really want your thoughts on that i don’t know what to think or what to believe but i’ll be really disappointed if what they’re saying is true

+++++++++++++

I'm just gonna group these together--I've been out today, and it took me a while to figure out what everyone was all in a lather about, but it looks like a lot of other people have answered this, and a lot more coherently than I ever could! Check out this one, this one, and this one! And my tags!

[aroaessidhe]

2022 reads // twitter thread  

Silver In The Mist

in a land divided by a dangerous magical mist, a young spy is sent to infiltrate the enemy country and capture a young powerful caster to restore her own country’s dying magic

filigree magic

no romance, friendship & familial relationships