#idk i have some Thoughts on the death stuff but it's irrelevant to this specific point so i digress

[saeraas]

hate the "gojo dies with geto/kenjaku" hc/theory or whatever because 10000% of the time they always depict shoko as taking the brunt of it (burying them, performing an autopsy, etc) and being alone in the end, yet her feelings are never in the focus of this hc at all. those are her friends too

[spectrum-core]

1 14 23 + the black haired dude you draw a lot

Longass rant ahead because I Am So Normal About This Dude He's Like A Brother To Me

Short answer: he's very hot

Long answer: honestly as it always happens i joked so hard about this guy that without realizing he had become my favorite character from ruina. There's also that I just, tend to resonate a lot w characters who are just Some Guy and he happens to have the feeling of being a secondary character even in the singular cutscene where he shows up (before dying a death that's so pointless and absurd it almost comes off as comical, pour one for my mans 😔✊), there's also the fact that he has this cold and emotionless and professional exterior but his dialogue lines, specially during gameplay segments (as opposed to in cutscenes), show that he actually has a very emotional/caring inner self and he's just suppressing that side of him, either because he feels like he needs to act cold and professional to be taken seriously or just to cope with the nature of the universe he lives in and his job and it's like Yeah Maybe That Hits A Bit Too Close Home, to add to it ruina has this feature akin to like a bestiary (?) of sorts where you can read little blurbs of text implied to have been something each defeated enemy character said/thought at some point of their lives, and ofc Mr. Irrelevant McBackgroundCharacter here has a worldbuilding exposition (as do most of my favorite characters in the game let's be real 😔) but it has this specific cynical tone of him trying to rationalize why things are the way they are while still questioning them/thinking it doesn't fully make sense and it's like you go little guy! keep pondering the concepts of power and freedom and if they're even possible to achieve in your universe without losing your sense of self and therefore not gaining them because the person who achieved them is no longer yourself!

Conclusion this guy was probably engineered in a lab to be appealing to me in particular and I love him so much and he makes me feel way too many things for a guy with like 10 dialogue lines and a worldbuilding exposition.

Some sort of like... industrial/military-esque... goth style? Some sort of mostly practical but still stylish kinda thing, loose fabric that allows for movement, mostly grey, black and cold desaturated tones, straight cuts, lots of pockets when needing to carry lots of stuff (not too many bags as the straps can limit mobility if you carry too many of them + having a bag hanging around gets annoying at times), materials made to last long (and probably some patched up/manually repaired stuff just for that sweet extra durability), probably also with some emphasis on layered clothes as to be prepared for a varied weather (<- delusional, proyecting) and so on, while still keeping it stylish and wearing accesories if/when possible (but not too many of them, after the main focus would be practicality i think), and belts, lots of belts, stereotypical jrpg protagonist levels of belts here, also this guy 100% wears eyeliner to me, just look at his sprite.

idk I don't know about fashion terms so i just described the vibe of how I imagine he usually dresses like.

Out of official artwork, this one, 100%, it gives me the vibe of a guy trying too hard to look edgy and badass and reverting to be absolutely silly without realizing, absolute cringefail loser behavior (affectionate)

Out of fanart... there's like 3 people who make fanart of him me included so I may as well focus on my stuff, it's these 3: first one bc while I still wasn't used to his dessign it manages to convey such a Vibe (him showing the emotional/caring side I mentioned in 1), I don't feel like he's the kind of guy to smile a lot, if ever, so I feel like when he actually smiles it's something extra special for the people around him and I think I managed to convey that in the picture, the second one because the stylization goes hard + I managed to get juuuuust the right amount of spikiness on his hair (very important) and also I like how I made his eyes in there, and third is just what I feel has been my best take on his dessign in general, specially facial features, that is how I Imagine He Looks Like.

[phoneybeatlemania]

ok idk maybe this is an unpopular opinion but I want to hear your thoughts:

“All Those Years Ago” is kind of…tasteless, right? Like, he’s using a melody that he had already written and then there’s all that religious stuff? idk, like it doesn’t really feel all that heartfelt to me which I didn’t expect from George. Good tune though.

Hmmmm. Okay so, I do largely agree with this (agree about the Religion Stuff being a bad call—but personally don't really see the issue with him using a pre-written melody), and its how Ive felt about the song for awhile now. Not sure if its an unpopular opinion or not though, since I don't see enough discussion surrounding the song to say (I do however know that at least a few other people on here also feel the same way about it).

What bugs me about him bringing up religion in the song is that it kind of hijacks Johns death in order to spread a message about God, which feels disrespectful to me tbh. If John had consistently been a very religious person, I don't think Id really have an issue with this because it would have probably been what he'd wanted. But Johns theism tended to waver, with him going through different theistic phases. So its kind of clear that he was essentially agnostic, and while there were periods of his life where he was more dedicated to certain religions, he tended to outgrow them eventually.

Which is why I find it annoying that George would write something like "They've forgotten all about God / He's the only reason we exist / Yet you were the one that they said was so weird / All those years ago". He's taking the image of someone who was ambiguous and unsure about religion, and then using his death to send a message which is kind of, dare I say, irrelevant.

I would like to clarify though that I don't think George did this with a mal-intent or to consciously try and make Johns image align perfectly with his own beliefs. Most likely scenario is that he probably just got a bit too passionate and swept away by his religious beliefs. It is still just an aspect to the song though—which is otherwise a BOP—which I personally find uncomfortable.

@idontwanttospoiltheparty has a different take on the song though, so if you want to read a counter argument to my own here's a message she sent me once on it:

I have to say, I feel like All Those Years Ago gave me like….kind of clarity on what I think George thought of John, like in the end. But maybe I'm going off the rails with over-interpreting.

So I just think to him John was…like someone who was basically his partner in his transition like into his spirituality. Like the person who saw him through that, and despite them being estranged he always valued him as yeah….this person who accompanied him on a crucial part of his journey.

Like it sort of comes through in the song with how much he focuses both on like You Were So Much Smarter Than Everyone You Got It and specifically how it's "all those years ago", he remembers him mostly for how they were a long time ago.

And there's an interesting part of the song — so like, it seems like George was relatively unbothered by John's death as a concept, but bothered by the violence and unnaturalness of it — and I think some of the weird God ranting is because he's remembering like all the times he thinks John was mistreated and saying it's because other people don't get it.

Like it does actually all feel related to me in a way? Very loosely.

And I find it interesting cause he plays into the whole Martin Luther Lennon trope which only half existed by That Point, but I wouldn't think George would be insincere and yeah, I think he's talking about something far more personal that happens to sound a lot like the Jean Jacket narrative.

[miawinters]

i finished god of war ragnarok

i wouldnt call it a bad game, but i personally did get tired of it lol. quickest possible bullet points below...

what i liked:

the intertwining themes of fate, familial relationships, discussions of abuse, people changing, and the cycle of violence

stuff about judgement, kratos learning of what mimir did to that whale and his lore text entry being smth like "to think that he did something as cruel and awful as this..." and then kratos saying how it reminded him of his own past sins

kratos' personal character development, esp w the end foreshadowing he'd be a loved god instead of a hated/feared one like odin mocked him over

the initial thor boss fight i saw leaks of before the game even released, it was great without me playing and v cool doing it

all the wolves :)

the character designs were mostly nice

angrboda <3 but actually all the female characters are done well

theres a lot of good little details (but also kind of a negative bc its technically not necessary and half the time its not subtle about it)

the little nods between games; kratos knowing the runes, kratos expanding on his "close your heart to it" lesson he taught atreus, etc.,

its probably good for photomode, idk i didnt take too many pics lol (but also a negative...)

loved hearing sunwon cho as the squirrel (and was obsessed with his intro)

they definitely improved the enemies. theyre not all just orgres/trolls/elemental humanoids

nice music

things i didnt like:

kratos looses his cape/coat immediately in the game 🙄

there were a lot of weird moments in the story where it felt like things just conveniently happened. freya happens to show up w odin's noose she pocketed earlier. thrud wants to kill atreus but sif literally just steps into the frame and wholeheartedly vouches for atreus, despite their last interaction being her calling on thor to kill him, atreus decided not to kill odin, but imprison him, hands it to kratos, he hands it to freya, she gives it back to atreus, and sindri comes out of nowhere and smashes it and vanishes. probably more moments like this that suddenly happen

and if im gonna seriously describe it, its more like weird character development too? besides the story not developing things in a convincing way, but like specifically w that one sif/thrud/skjodr/atreus scene it absolutely felt convenient that she just shows up and handles thrud's whole sheltered/indoctrinated pov, and thrud becomes an ally right away. stuff like that

i personally had a v hard time understanding or empathizing with any character that wasnt kratos. MAYBE atreus (but its much less than the first game). i was outright annoyed at characters like freya, brok, tyr, and the brother, and did not like them

a lot of character deaths felt like they had no impact to me? the almost traveller almost had a sacrificial heroes' death, and all i thought was how i didnt even know his name. brok died so easily and quickly (despite the dwarves not really getting any story for themselves) and i never really even liked him anyways, thor fucking turned to dust and 20 minutes later i forgot what his fate was, freya's brother died and i could not care less about him

also the tyr is secretly odin thing was... idk why they did that tbh lmao. i found it funny and started laughing when it happened. idk what that accomplished and there and odin wasnt even successfully hindering them. up until the reveal tyr just was included in my mental criticism of the characters as having done nothing

but ig if u forget the game w how quickly and irrelevant the odin plot twist was i'd bet some people would just flat out remember tyr as being useless

the game also reminds me of horizon zero dawn to horizon forbidden west where u meet characters but dont have time to get to know them, but the sequel acts like youre all buddy buddy now. maybe except mimir, i wouldnt say i loved sindri, brok, and especially new characters like the brother and tyr until the twist

before the game came out i think i saw a reviewer compare the quests to tw3's side quests and i think tw3 is overrated, but the side quests here didnt come close, and they definitely didnt work as substitutes for kratos/atreus bonding w the new characters

the humor was also weird, its how i imagine mcu movies are. characters like brok, sindri, and the vanir brother especially suffered from it. and even kratos who i liked the most ended up getting repetitive "jokes" that were just atreus saying smth innocuous, and kratos saying no for the 50th time (it gets old)

the game also lacked subtlety many times. im not opposed to media flat out having a character declare a point of the work, but this game had so many details, i could praise atreus' comment abt sif being a good mom, mimir being shocked, and see it as an indication that theyve changed (but they also do say "we need to change!" 100x later), but also thor later when u go out w him the 2nd time and he had some comment abt literally not thinking and i was like :/ come on... another time was when atreus looks at the ground and points out how messy sindri's home is in his absence, while later at brok's funeral i noticed his still dirty armor w/o a character having to declare it

the world looks good in a photomode shot for promo material way, but playing it initially felt overbearing? i like to shit on naughty dog for beating a dead horse with the last of us, but they at least have their level design together where at any moment u know where to go along/head to, disneyworld style. even if gowr was kind of open worldish, i constantly felt like i couldnt distinguish what area would lead to the main quest, or if it'd be a side collectible (and more often than not i decided to just pick up the thing bc i was already there), so that ironically felt not accessible?

also the fact that some puzzles just relied on being able to find them, instead of actually finding something out. some enemies and shit also blended into the background

the gameplay ai was incredibly annoying, this kind of goes with my complaint abt subtlety, kratos not even coming into an area and atreus giving the first hint how to progress w/o me even laying eyes on the puzzle. then by the time i'd consider one hint, he's already given me the final one. also somehow there being hints for simple things but never when i was actually stumped. and the "you're on fire!" was very not needed, if i dont notice that, that's probably on me. Accessibility is one thing, but not letting me think ironically goes against one of the themes lol

i did have some bugs, heimdall's lion turned invisible at one point, i had floating boats, and half of atreus' dialogue in vanaheim was cut off and never repeated, which felt frustrating lore-wise, there'd also be moments where i pressed the journal to read and it just froze blank, making me not wanna read any lore

i think there was also less of a focus on lore in ragnarok, kratos saying "hm." when reading a loremarker compared to atreus summing it up in 2018, and expanding in his journal. i guess the excuse is the focus on ragnarok, but still

i cant decide how i feel abt this, but kind of faye making an appearance? i feel somehow her haunting the narrative in the first felt more impactful than her physically showing up in gowr. i'd say maybe characters speaking abt her (besides that thor fight stuff) wouldve been more interesting? esp since in 2018 kratos/atreus only know brok, sindri, freya, and mimir as allies then and mimir only finds out at the end. idk i feel like her being a mystery was kind of unique?

back to the characters tbh but i wish u saw more? in 2018 i remembered thinking theyre literally in the middle of nowhere around no humans besides like 6 raiders in the beginning, but then even at the end of ragnarok, no dwarves meet kratos or anything, alfheim was still at war, and probably still should be w the bro dead, vanaheim only had the small group, and asgard felt like just thor's family. the game didnt expand on the few they had and didnt even show that many

so yeah, maybe other things, too, i cant think of anything else. i guess technically its a good game, definitely a polished AAA game? but i wouldnt say i liked it much..? i wouldnt give it a near perfect score either lol, i dont hate it, but it does remind me of how i feel abt hfw. i definitely liked 2018's and even gow3 more.

[sokkagatekeeper]

I think with zukka it’s the exact opposite as soulmates like in every way these two should’ve never even met let alone connect but they did and they do and they balance each other out in so many ways... them being together isnt fulfilling some serious destiny them being together is being able to let their guard down and being who they were never allowed to be: youthful, and playful... essentially when I think of zukka I think of laughter and the heaviness one’s heart feels when they’re nearly overwhelmed with happiness. No fate, no destiny, no titles... just being.

i think that in order to break down what sokka and zuko’s relationship means in relation to soulmates especially interpreting this relationship as romantic, we need to start with the basics. get ready for a long and probably pretty wordy ride.

let's start with the meaning of the word “soulmate” specifically in fandom. the most common perception of a soulmate in fandom is that your soulmate is quite literally the other half of your soul, meaning that without this romantic interest you are somehow incomplete. now, what the hell is a soul? according to my dear friend google, a soul is “the spirit or the essence of a person, and the part of the person that makes them who they are and will be even after death.” is it even possible to split a soul in half? well, in my opinion everyone in fandom is essentially insane, so i’d rather say that no, it is not possible for a soulmate to be the other part of your soul, or for another person fictional or otherwise to complete you as another person, fictional or otherwise (when it's fictional, a soulmate can add depth and nuance, maybe?? but not complete. what the fuck does complete even mean). i have a more interesting interpretation of the meaning of a soulmate at hand, specifically because my first language is spanish: the closest thing to the word “soulmate” in spanish is alma gemela, literally “twin soul.” i believe it is much more interesting to interpret a soulmate as a person whose soul is a mirror to yours, or a reflection. a complement. the notion that someone is perfect and made for you romantically is essentially full of shit and a very lazy mindset, but anyway. 

if we’re talking about being destined to meet a person, or being different faces of the same coin, or stuff like that, then of course this is a thing in fiction. aang and zuko and katara are definitely soulmates in terms of being destined to meet and change each other in a meaningful and earth-shattering way. the concepts of destiny and fate are not only an actual thing in atla, but also very prominent and loud in themes and narrative, and in the mindsets and beliefs of the characters themselves; it heavily influences their actions and approach to other characters, especially zuko. from his perspective, zuko’s dynamic with aang throughout the show and in general (meaning before and after he joined the gaang) is in part shaped by his sense of morality, and in part by his belief that his destiny is somehow intertwined with aang’s (he was right, of course), similarly to how katara approached aang (too, as a beacon of hope) or even how she saw zuko as a definitive enemy (in contrast to how sokka saw zuko as pretty much a fool and a recurrent inconvenience) aang, katara, and zuko’s dynamics with each other are all somehow related to destiny, the general concept of soulmates as a mirror of your soul, whether consciously or unconsciously. this is part of what makes them the central thematic trio and the heart of the show.

knowing all this, let’s go back to sokka and zuko. in short, as i’ve said before, to each other they are just… some guys. to elaborate, to sokka, zuko was just 1) some guy in the way, another inconvenience that occasionally got in between him and in his business with the avatar, whom he didn’t respect at all and didn’t think of as an enemy, 2) just some guy to be wary of for all of the aforementioned reasons, and 3) some guy, but cool and nice and a friend, possibly a love interest?? idk we’ll see!! meanwhile to zuko, sokka was 1) some guy in the way, another inconvenience that occasionally got in between him and in his business with the avatar, whom he didn’t respect at all and didn’t think of as an enemy, 2) some guy, who is amazing and cool and he will break into a prison with him because why not?? so we can safely say, while there are direct parallels between them and are definitely connected in some spiritual way (as are all of the gaang, in my opinion!!), sokka and zuko themselves do not know that. the weight of being meant-to-be in their relationship is nonexistent, and i definitely agree that they can relax around each other in that sense, especially zuko (who believes in destiny therefore i mention him a lot, in comparison to sokka who does not believe in destiny therefore doesn’t carry the weight of anf his relationships being shaped by it which. they arguably are, as it is a story that was predefined, but that’s for another day). it’s been talked about that the most compelling thing about sokka and zuko’s relationship revolves around the concept of choice. the boiling rock is the only life-changing field trip that zuko was initially denied, but insisted on going anyway. he decided to go out of pure selflessness, solely to help sokka, in contrast to him being quite literally required to go as aang’s teacher/to prove himself and get katara off his back (as well as other subconsious reasons, that, too, for another day). zuko went with sokka because he thought he was dope, and as we all know zuko cannot do anything half-way so he decided he would die for the guy (valid of him, by the way). their entire relationship is just subversion after subversion after subversion.

it’s also related to sokka being just some guy, not only as he believes himself to be but also how sokka is pretty much the fourth part of the thematic triangle that aang katara and zuko have going on. he balances each of their pure hearts and idealism with a sharp mind and bitchy but useful pessimism. sokka being just some guy to zuko’s deuteragonist is the thematic equivalent of sokka being a main character and suki being a secondary character. it works because the weight of universal forces just isn’t there, and it works better than (in my opinion!!) katara and zuko or (to a lesser degree) aang and katara being romantically involved for the same reasons.

and anyway. when it comes to fandom interpretation, it’s very easy to think of every parallelism/symbolism as a sign of two characters being meant to be together romantically, or whatever. and while it is fun, most parallels (at least among the gaang) are mostly to show how the characters are able to understand and connect with each other whether romantically or platonically (and the destiny in fiction thing i’m too tired to talk about again), so the parallels between sokka and zuko are not entirely irrelevant to their romantic potential — people are also quick to think every parallel/trope/catchy line about their relationship is shallow and stupid and soulmates suck anyway!! and therefore i’m asking you all to calm down and find a middle ground. not every parallel/trope/etc is romantic and not every parallel/trope/etc is dumb and irrelevant. when it comes to the infamous “prince and the fool” for example, some people take it as the ultimate proof of their love and some think it’s utter nonsense and a cheap version of the zvtara’s moon/sun dynamic. and both of them are wrong!! “the prince and the fool” is in fact pretty much like “the wise and the brave” of katara and sokka. it is merely a descriptive of the way they act with each other, the way their differences balance each other, the way they contrast each other, etc etc. they do work as descriptive on their own, but not as well as they work when put together; yes, sokka is wise, but how wise? what is the standard for him to be considered wise, or even the opposite? sokka being wise works in terms of aesthetic, character, dynamic, etc etc, only if katara is being brave right besides him. zuko is a prince, sure, but what else is there? what is the alternative? you can call sokka a fool (and you would be wrong, by the way) but what does that word alone bring to his character? 

to conclude, i believe the thing about sokka and zuko’s relationship is that there’s nothing definitive to it by universal order — or rather, while it might exist, it's definitely to a lesser degree than other relationships in their lives, therefore the characters themselves don't notice it and there's no pressure to fulfill any prophecies; they just are, and they just do. you can have a passionate and true love without it being the sole meaning of your existence, or your sole motivation and priority in your life. it’s clear that in case they were romantically involved they wouldn’t even be the person they love the most (as it is very clear the person sokka loves the most is katara (!!!), while zuko’s is probably iroh?? idk). i believe the best part of a romantic relationship between sokka and zuko is that they are just some guys, maybe not to the universe but to each other. if they have to choose each other as they do, if they just get each other as well as they do, who care about each other a shit ton even if not any more than their other friends and family but just a little differently, while they aren’t canonically soulmates the way aang and zuko or aang and katara are (while the potential is there) i’d go as far as to say they are some sort of kindred spirits. i think it all depends on how you define soulmates, really.

[pluviophile-imagines]

Could I ask what your sexuality headcanons are? I love comparing mine with other peoples’!

Ok second half of this; this is just like. non-students who i Actually have thought about HJBAFV not at all a comprehensive list. Again disclaimer i write all these chars as bi in my fics, also i am bi myself so the vast majority are also bi, and also leaving a lot of these vague so u can imagine ur favorite ship or urself or w/ever

ok lets start this off with Aizawa. I think....... hes another one who's rlly unlabelled, doesnt super care to think it through and define it, but calls himself gay bc his interest in women is very, very rare and it's just way easier to say than explain all that. Definitely do buy into the idea that he had a crush on Oboro in hs but i do NOT buy into the easermic agenda sorry. Definitely not someone who goes looking for dates, but doesn't say no if someone asks him and hes interested (also im not gonna give her a whole section but i saw a hc a while back that the Ms. Joke stuff is literally that shes a lesbian and hes gay and shes fucking with him and i love that so much i just wanted to put it out there)

on the topic of the erasermic agenda: Hizashi's pan and knew it before HS, had a sudden & intense crush on Aizawa for the first month they knew each other and then immediately got over it in favor of a similar sudden, intense, and then immediately fading crush on Midnight. Hizashi and Aizawa r just rlly good friends imo; maybe they messed around for a bit in their twenties but it never went anywhere serious. He dates around a lot, not even necessarily to settle down just to have some fun

Midnight is aro/ace but does get in qprs & gravitates towards women wrt that. Most people dont read vigilantes but theres a woman in that, Kazuho, who i imagine she's been in a long-term qpr with; her relationship with aizawa and hizashi leans a little more towards a qpr than a normal friendship, too, but it's not rlly defined that way

All Might is married to justice queer but v much not interested in relationships. He and that one guy from the first movie are ABSOLUTELY exes and i won't hear otherwise; it's the only relationship he's ever had, and they broke up bc he had to go back to japan. He was heartbroken but did eventually get over him; his lack of romance afterwards is from genuine disinterest and not being hung up on his past. I can see him finding someone else in his later years, after he's retired. Definitely feels like he's not worthy of it tho

Hawks is bi but unfortunately didn't get to figure that out until like Now in the timeline...... if youll let my dabihawks history shine through i think dabi was the reason JHBASFGJHB he was basically brainwashed by the commission to become a hero so he didnt have time to Figure That Shit Out; he knew he was into women bc that was easy & what the commission expected from him but then he started this undercover assignment and met dabi and realized Oh...... Fuck. Hawks is hard tbh, bc i think between the control that the commission has over him and his own convictions as a hero he doesn't pursue any romance (tho he does get crushes or find people attractive) and most of his flings are done to keep up his prettyboy act, not out of genuine interest in being a fuckboy. Can't imagine him having a relationship until well after canon but I do see him being interested eventually

Onto the villains, Shigaraki is unlabelled but probably would call himself queer if asked. Definitely admires women more but isn't very interested in romance; AFO actively encourages him to pursue the things interested in so imo if he were he'd talk abt it more lmfao. I kinda see him as demi as well, not the type to fall immediately but requiring a friendship beforehand; tho unlike Bakugo as i said in my last post I dont think it happens suddenly but rather slowly. Y'all know im a big fan of shigaraki being absolutely whipped for his s/o so i do thing hes a big piner, tho he's also pretty bold and unashamed of his affections. I'm a big fan of him falling for a member of the league or a civilian; definitely can't see him falling for a hero unless the hero was already halfway to turning sides already. I think he's also attracted to intelligence and someone who pushes him to think more abt his ideology...... maybe im just projecting at this point JSHDFBVAJKSHD but my point is that the gender of his partner is definitely the least of what he considers/notices

Dabi is bi and, here's my bold take, demisexual; not interested in sex unless its with someone he loves. Absolutely doesn't even think abt romance for most of the years where he's on his own. He's got revenge to plan. By the time he joins the league that hasn't changed much, and he's demi so he's not interested in sleeping around, plus he rlly denies any attachment to people at all. As I said in that other ask tho I do rlly like the idea of him with Magne, so I think they have a fling for a bit before her death :( it's one of the things that leads him to isolate himself further, unfortunately, even from Jin and the other League members with whom his relationships aren't romantic. I can see him dating someone post-canon bc i think hes gonna be redeemed lol. It could be someone he knew before but they probably didnt date again bc he was v guarded; i think magne was rlly the only person he dated

Magne is pan and heres the kicker: I think shes t4t, which led to a little moment just before she and dabi got together where he was like "she wouldnt be into me :/" but she was into him anyway so all was good. She got around in her circles, mostly casual stuff tho she yearned for something more serious.

Spinner's bi & trends towards women but does occasionally get things for men and they're almost always intense. He thought he was straight for a while even once he joined the league and then suddenly got a crush on Shigaraki (around the time of MVA) and realized otherwise LMFAO he's definitely a hopeless romantic type, the whole mutant prejudice thing makes it rlly hard for him and i can see him being rlly happy with another mutant-type; i feel like as he matures he starts to gravitate towards them

Toga is canonically pan to my understanding, iirc her interest in Uraraka and Deku is the same (and romantic) in canon tho i might be wrong. Poor girl just needs therapy. I like the idea of the two of them becoming her friends over her being involved with them but i totally can get behind her having a thing with Uraraka (and maybe Tsu) at some point post-canon (presuming she gets redeemed), tho I think a qpr between the two/three of them would be longer lasting. And again presuming she gets therapy i can see her settling down with someone, gender irrelevant

Jin is unlabelled bc he hasn't much thought abt it, definitely had a thing for dabi and for hawks which does make me sad on both counts. I think he likes women slightly more abstractly/aesthetically and gets crushes more on men,. The dabi thing fades as they get closer and start to view each other as brothers. In his later years he doesn't rlly care about romance, I think he enjoys the experience of crushing but doesnt like dating people; his found family in the League is far more important to him. But i can see him falling head-over-heels for someone quite suddenly and having a bit of a whirlwind romance. Also someone for whom gender isn't much of a factor

Mr Compress is also queer and also hasn't rlly thought abt it. Definitely leans more towards women; he's like 30 but i like to think he also goes for older partners, 10 or 15 years his senior KJBADSJFHB idk he just has that Vibe with the way he calls himself an old man etc. A lot of the league i cant see sleeping or dating around much, i feel like they prioritize each other, but I do think mr compress gets around more than the others. i can see him having a bit of a fuckbuddy who he catches feelings for

Kurogiri is fun; as Oboro I do think Aizawa's crush was reciprocated, tho he wasn't around long enough for them to act on it :( he's bi, tho kurogiri isn't supposed to have personal interests. I like to imagine the brainwashing isnt as good as AFO wants it to be tho so I like the idea of him falling for someone anyway. I also like the idea of the heroes managing to undo the nomufication and I 100% can see him, aizawa, and someone else (someone he was involved with as Kurogiri) ending up in a triad as a result of aizawa and the third partner helping him through the aftermath of all that shit

Lady Nagant is a manga-only minor character but im in love with her so imma talk abt it. Shes bi and leans VERY heavily towards women, probably spent years questioning whether she was rlly bi or a lesbian before finally having a fling with a guy that she genuinely enjoyed. Has only ever been in long-term relationships with women and I v much think she has a gf at home who stayed even when she was arrested 🥺

Finally imma talk abt Natsuo bc i love that boy. He's one of the few unmarried chars with a love interest and he canonically has a gf. I do see him as IDing straight in canon ngl, but the kind of straight where he might actually be bi but his preference leans so heavily towards women and he grew up in a bad home so he just doesnt rlly think abt it bc hes v happy with women anyway. In shiganatsu thoughts shigaraki is the first man he has a thing for; i rlly can see the two of them in a triad with a woman specifically, who helps the two of them find each other and is the one who initiates bc its definitely a weird situation for natsuo

[driflew]

Tell me more about that Melanie meets Jon before Elias alternative au, like I want it, I want it so bad

yes im glad i added that to the tags of the last ask specifically bc i was hoping you'd ask. so. here. alternate plot of my witness brings me into existence if Jon met Melanie before Elias found him

this one is less fleshed out, bc i obviously didn't go that route, but is diverges when Jon goes back to work and sees Martin and Tim for the first time. when he's on his way to Elias's office, he runs into Melanie (dont ask me why she's there idk), who doesnt know hes meant to be dead and is sort of like "oh, god, did they give you your job back? fire that other guy?" and Jon is like oh thank god someone who knows who i am

Melanie tells Jon what she remembers about the other Jon, and they figure out together he'd been replaced for a while by someone who looks nothing like him. and, of course, that for some fuckin reason, Melanie is the only one who recognizes him so far(?) (get into one argument at some spooky institute...).

they part ways after a while, agreeing to stay in touch. and then, of course, Jon finds out what being erased from existence actually means. he's homeless and his friends dont recognize him, and with nowhere to go and no one to turn to... he remembers Melanie

now Melanie and Jon didn't have the best first impression, but you know that bit in mag76 where they're discussing military records and stuff, and there's that one shining moment where you can see how well they'd get along if they only had the chance? yeah thats the entire basis of this au. Jon is desperate and scared and Melanie isn't going to fucking throw him on the street, leading to the stupid sibling dynamic Melanie and Jon friendship we deserve.

(also, she's met a similar monster w Sarah Baldwin, so looking into whatever's going on with Jon isn't irrelevant to her, either. and now that she's got Some Guy in her apartment with an incredibly pressing issue, she's gonna have to postpone that India trip... this is also pretty decent reasoning to not accept that Institute job offer she was given, if this is what happens to employees)

they end up kind of periphery characters for the main plot, trying to figure out how to proceed w whatever happened to Jon and trying to undo it. i dunno exactly how that all would go, but i do have a bit in mind

1. i like to think if this was canon this would be fun simply bc the audience would be able to hear and recognize Jon's voice whenever he appears, but the main cast does not recognize him, believing him dead, making for possibly the most frustrating possible listening experience ever

2. at some point Georgie stops by to see Melanie and sees This Fuckin Guy on Melanie's couch who she does recognize... as that dude who showed up at her place a while back and was probably a stalker. cue Jon being reintroduced to one of his friends, now with a trusted source (Melanie) to help so Georgie will actually believe him.

this starts off giving Jon the confidence to actually start reintroducing himself to his other friends at the Institute. Melanie's testimony helps Sasha actually believe Jon (since it was Melanie who helped her realize Jon was replaced at all), plus the tape they have of jon's. uh. death. to compare his voice to.

Martin i think might be pretty quick to accept Jon after Sasha says she believes Jon is really who he says he is, but Tim would probably be the hard to get to come around. he's already lost Jon to a fake once, and he doesnt want to keep losing more and more of his friend's memory to the Circus. it would happen eventually, tho, bc Tim and Jon friendship means So Much to me and without it i WILL whittle away into nothing.

as w my witness canon, their memories of Jon from before will never come back. theyre always going to see notJon when they think back to the first few months/years of their friendship. but they can make new memories with the real Jon, which isn't something they thought they'd get to do

[euphoric-melloncollie]

little things - t.h

Pairing: Tom Holland x Female Reader

Word Count: 1.5k

Warnings: angst, swearing, mentions of death, just sad stuff

A/N: idk why I got so inspired to write something so dark but here I am, I'm just happy to post something so let me know what ya think? <3 (it’s a little personal so sorry if some things are oddly specific.) + flashbacks are in italics 

It was the little things.

It was the way he would sit in his car after dropping you off and wait for you to get inside safe.

Even if he was angry at you for slamming the door in his face after screaming at each other for hours in the shell of his car.

It was the way he would sit with you every time you cried, telling you that no matter what happened, no matter what you went through, that he would be there.

Even if the reason you were crying was because of him, he was there for you.

The way he would listen to you talk hours on end about things completely irrelevant to his life, just to hear your voice and know that he was important enough to you to entrust him with your thoughts.

Even if he had heard you talk about it multiple times prior, he always promised to listen.

How when you were feeling down about yourself, he would never fail to remind you of how beautiful, valued, and loved you were.

How when he was away filming, he would never forget to call you every single morning and every night just to tell you he loved you, or keep you up to date on what he was doing.

Even if he was on set for 14+ hours and wanted nothing more than to fall into bed and get as many minutes of sleep as possible before he had to wake up and do it again.

How he not only kept track of your cycle, but knew exactly the off-the-wall cravings you had, the products you preferred, and the way you needed his warmth to help ease your aches - to make sure you never were always well stocked and well cuddled.

How he knew all the lyrics to all the songs from your favorite bands.

How he would memorize all of the cheesy quotes to all of the cheesy rom-coms you repeatedly made him watch just to recite them back to you later when he knew you needed to hear them.

How when you don’t remember to get your regular maintenance done on your car, he takes it in for you so you won’t get pulled over and fined for it later.

Maybe they weren’t little things.

Maybe they were huge things, but you didn’t realize it and that was the issue.

But it was too late.

All the little things, all the big things,

Every single god-forsaken thing that this man was and did for you had consumed you.

The way his tongue would push to the side of his mouth and the way his brows furrowed when he was asked a question that he was trying to process and answer with thought and the utmost of certainty.

The way the wrinkles on the sides of his eyes would appear every single time you made him smile with your puns and obnoxious noise making, or when he’d seen you naked for the first time.

The way his eyes lit up when he would talk about his passions, his aspirations in life, and you.

God his eyes were always as bright as every dying star in the sky when he would talk about you.

What you wouldn’t do to see his eyes light up like that - just one more time.

Just one more time is all you would ask for, because you know you didn’t deserve even that but you would give anything.

You’d give anything to hear his voice one more time. Just once.

The way he would practice his different accents in preparation for a new role. His ever so popular-in-the-bedroom Queens accent. It was always an inside joke between you and your friends, but that didn’t mean it wasn’t a real thing you two dabbled in once or twice.. Or maybe more than you could count.

The way he’d sing to you when your mind wouldn’t shut off long enough for you to fall asleep. Or the way he’d sing with you when you would drive around late at night when the power would go out at your apartment and you couldn’t stand being home.

And god, did you miss his laugh. You would never fail to remind him how his laugh is what made you fall for him in the first place. And how, in return, you making him laugh is what made him fall truly, madly, and deeply in love with you.

But what does all your time together matter now when this happens?

They all mean nothing now.

What does you telling him how much he drove you crazy when he would forget to respond to his work emails, or how he would leave a trail of dirty clothes everywhere - or any other stupid little things you guys would fight about - matter when he finally left you?

It doesn’t matter.

All the little things, all the big things,

They do not matter.

And now you’re left here, completely alone next to a headstone yet to be engraved with the man you once loved’s name and you can’t help but get angry.

Angry that he lied.

Angry that when he said he would be there for you no matter what, no matter what you meant through - that he lied.

Angry that you wasted all of those minutes, hours - days even - hammering him with all of the stupid things in life that shouldn’t matter.

Angry that now you’ll have to walk inside of your home with no one watching you get inside safe.

Angry that you have to cry, grieve, and mourn the man you once loved completely alone.

Furious that you wasted so much time selfishly rambling about irrelevant bullshit, instead of telling him how much him listening to you ramble meant to you.

Furious that you’ll never again hear him say, “I love you. Always and forever,”

Livid because no matter how much you loved him, no matter how much he loved you, that it didn’t matter because he’s gone.

Tom was gone.

The love of your life was gone.

Your best friend, your protector, your partner in crime, your Tommy was gone.

And the last thing you had ever said to him was how you wished you could take it all back because it hurt so much anytime you would think of it all.

Why would you say that?

Why would you say you’d take it all back?

You would do anything to have the constant bickering and long nights back if it meant he was alive and with you.

Your last words to him were eating you alive because you can’t even wrap your head around why you would say them.

But what was even worse than your last words to him were the words he last said to you,

“Why are you doing this?” he had said, a crack in his voice and tear filled eyes, “why are you pushing me away when all I ever try to do for you is make you happy?”

You can’t take this anymore, you remembered thinking to yourself. “Because you’re you, Tom,” you had sighed, fingers scraping tirelessly through your hair, “and I’m me.”

“What the fuck does that even mean Y/n?!” He had never yelled at you like that before that night.

““I love you so, so much. Have I not proved that to you time and time again?” he sounded tired, exhausted from yelling.

“I”m tired of this!!!”

You broke him, you were broken, you could’ve fixed it but you were too selfish to know how.

“I wish I could take it all back, it hurts too much, just erase it all so we weren’t in this situation right now, Tom.”

“I would die for you, Y/n.. You know that right? I wou-,” but you cut him off. You had shoved the door open with your fist and slammed it before running inside, away from his words that you were too afraid to hear.

Those were the last words he had spoken to you before you once again, slammed the door in his face. Right before he had sat, once again, and watched you run into your house making sure you were safe. Right before he had sped off recklessly in his car, the image of the girl he loved most in the world clouding his mind.

And now you’ll live forever in guilt, knowing you couldn’t even let him finish his sentence, his real last words to you.

And you’re sitting there next to the untouched granite telling yourself, those are the last words you deserved.

You didn’t deserve the words you have waiting for you on your phone, on the unopened voicemail marked with his name and the heart he had placed next to it after your first date.

You didn’t deserve to hear his voice again.

You deserved the empty feeling of not knowing what he had to say.

[studiobeebo]

Hello dear your work makes me smile whenever I see it,may I request some headcannons of Shinsou and s/o who went dark side? (Both villains, s/o has a quirk like psychosis, where they can make whoever the quirk is being used on experience extreme hallucinations/stuff) Are they completely cracked or is it something like Stain's ideology, where they go after the corrupt hero's who don't deserve their title? (The idea of class 1-A dealing with them makes me cackle, cause shit dude, they're screwed)

LISTEN HERE I FUCKING LOVE VILLAIN SHINSOU AND I NEVER FUCKING SHUT UP ABOUT HIM TO MY FRIEND @star-sprite SO THANK YOU SO FUCKIN MUCH AND I HOPE YOU LIKE IT! (ALSO SRRY THIS IS DONE IN A DIF STYLE THAN USUAL BUT I WANTED TO BE ABLE TO ANSWER YOUR SPECIFIC QUESTIONS)…and also i decided to test out my nsfw writing a bit so it might be garbage idk sdhsjd

Villain! Shinsou Hitoshi

First of all, I’d imagine both Shinsou and his s/o are..fairly sane..heh

With quirks that are both very often scene as having villainous or evil intent, they both grew up facing the ridicule and the hatred and this hatred festered once the two of them got together.

Think of it in this way, you know how sometimes you get excited for a thing and you excitedly tell your friend, and they are equally excited so the two of you just become a yelling mess of excitement? That is sort of how Shinsou and his s/o’s hatred grew stronger together. They both saw how the other was treated which finally opened their eyes to the fact that no one deserves that and that the ‘system’ is total bullshit, only allowing those with flashy quirks to have the spotlight while the rest are left to rot in their shadows.

This realization is what pushed them to a life of villainy, though at first in their eyes, they were the heroes for the underdogs. They were going to fix this fucked system and cross the lines that needed to be crossed for the sake of others like them.

At first, murder and anything extreme was out of the question. Like anyone would who wanted a large scale problem fixed, they started out small, leading rally’s or symbolically destroying certain monuments and artifacts. After that things got a bit more intense with either Shinsou, his s/o, or both of them working to influence certain people to get things done. When that wasn’t enough though, ohoh that’s when their lives got fun.

The first time the both teamed up to kill someone..neither of them were really expecting the thrill. It was just some low level pro, the thought was that taking out a few mediocre ‘heroes’ who didn’t deserve the title would stir something, but fuck was it fun for Shinsou’s s/o to cause their target to hallucinate that they were getting away from the two only to have their last view being the blood spilling from the bullet wound in their head.

Shinsou was honestly scared at how much of an adrenaline rush was coursing through his veins and he had to bite his cheek to keep himself from smiling. He felt sick at the idea of enjoying such a thing, but he couldn’t help it, and when he heard a stifled laugh come from his s/o, he knew he didn’t really have to hide it if they felt the same way.

It was after this revelation that sanity became a concern of the past. With the two of them together, they could do a lot and they knew this very, very well. They still had a job to do, sure, but everyone loved to have a bit of fun at work.

It almost became a game to see what fucked up things his s/o could come up with to get into people’s heads, and by that time Shinsou had perfected the art of controlling people while letting them still have their thoughts, so all the while they would be able to know every move they made and not be able to do a damn thing about it.

Now doing this wasn’t something he particularly enjoyed doing a whole lot because it could be difficult to do so for long, but his s/o just always got such a kick out of it that he couldn’t help himself.

It got to a point where he’d pick up ‘toys’ for his s/o that had nothing to do with their cause, but his s/o liked having something to keep them entertained, especially when they were hanging low for a while. Mostly they’d end up just using the people Shinsou controlled as servants, but if his s/o wanted it, he’d get it for them.

Sometimes, thinking back on their high school days, Shinsou wondered if his influence on his s/o was what had made them oh so cracked, but every time he saw that devilish smile on his s/o’s face, everything else faded away and he realized this was ride or die no matter who came to take them down.

On top of that, his dependence on his s/o had grown over the years and his time without them made him feel like he was having fucking withdrawals, so he knew he was hooked, but honestly?? He didn’t ever want to be fixed.

Slowly but surely, Shinsou and his s/o will sort of feed off one another’s lost grip of reality and their goal, and before you know it they are no longer freedom fighters for the underdog’s, they’re just incredible, unstoppable villains.

Things change after this point and their views become more selfish. They start a very ‘if we want it, we’ll take it’ type lifestyle and they end up with a hand in many different types of businesses and such. Drugs, weapons, you name it. With their quirks they can get shit with zero cost and make all the profit they could ever fucking want so they’re living like a King and Queen.

Of course, they can’t let others in the same business know too much about them so they can’t live overly lavishly and they have to seem like they are on the same level as everyone else is in the playing field. This means that straight up stealing is limited, but every once in a while Shinsou will just tell someone to hand over their product without a fuss, or his s/o will make them believe that the products they gave were paid for.

When things get too easy, they both end up itching to go the extra mile to get the same thrill as they used to. This means risky missions, many near death experiences, using some of the ‘products’ they should be sending out to be sold on the streets, anything. It’s almost like they are living only with the purpose of telling death to come and stop them.

It was during one of these ‘risky’ missions when the two of them had run into a group of old pals from UA. Shinsou specifically told his s/o to leave Deku alone, but the rest were fair game.

While it was nice seeing their old classmates crumble, the ones who were always so high and mighty were the best to watch. Seeing fear in the eyes of those who claimed to not know of such things was definitely a treat.

All the while, as skewed as their motives have become, their personalities are the same and Shinsou is the same old snarky, tired eyed little shit and his s/o is the same as they’ve always been. Of course there’s a bit of questionable sanity thrown in there, but that’s totally irrelevant..right?

NSFW

I’m not saying either of them are sex addicts or anything, but when you mix an adrenaline rush with two intense lovers such as themselves, things get very heated very easily.

There is a lot of fucking straight after a mission. Hell, the two of them could be in the lavish penthouse of some poor fuck they just murdered and robbed with the body still slumped in the corner and he’ll have his s/o pinned up against the wall twenty feet away.

Originally, Shinsou was a very passionate and slow lover when it came to sex with his s/o. He liked taking the time to show his appreciation and he’d happily take a half hour or longer to eat out/suck off his lover to his heart’s content because he can’t deny that hearing them beg for release gets him just as excited as hearing a hero with a gun to their head begging to be spared.

He still will do this if he’s got the time, but fuck has he come to love the fast, erotic post-murder/mission fucking fueled by adrenaline and excitement at the previous venture.

During these times, things get rough and Shinsou is absolutely one to leave little finger shaped bruises all down his s/o’s sides from gripping too hard. Oddly enough though, he tries not to leave many hickies because when he sees them the next day, he finds it hard to concentrate just because he wants to bend his s/o over the nearest table and fuck them all over again.

The two of them have also had more time to develop less..vanilla tastes and indulge in likes or kinks that may seem strange to others.

For example, Shinsou stopped being embarrassed about it a long time ago, but a lot of times he’s asked his s/o to wear lipstick because he has an odd fascination with seeing everywhere their lips were on his body after a passionate evening.

E s p e c i a l l y when he has the honor of seeing that ring of red or pink so close to the base of his cock. It’s almost a game to see how far his s/o was able to take it this time around and he’s always hoping that they’ll ‘win’ that game and make it to the ‘top’.

[gotgifsandmusings]

Full musings on Infinity War

Anonymous said to gotgifsandmusings: I'm just waiting for your thoughts on Thanos. I know there will be thoughts.

Ha, there are thoughts indeed. I was thinking of recording a video about it, but my mic seems to be messed up from the journey, and Griffin’s mic picks up everything...

Alright, fuck it, I’ll just write everything I was thinking about Infinity War, because overall I’d call it a frustrating viewing experience.

FULL MOVIE SPOILERS are below the cut, so you have been warned.

Very warned.

Okay then, let’s get into it.

I want to be able to have a neatly packaged thesis statement of “I did/didn’t like it,” but I do think my dissatisfaction with it is a bit more nuanced? Like, I was viscerally annoyed sitting through Ragnarok, and a lot of that were thanks to the expectations I had going into it. Here, I kind of didn’t care that much and didn’t read spoilers for that reason. Griffin was super hype to see it, I knew Lindsay Ellis didn’t react favorably to it on Twitter, and those two things alone were my only basis for any expectations.

I tend to have my mind wander think, “am I liking this?” during a movie screening. Had I been asked during this one, I couldn’t have clearly answered at all, at least not until the very end. There were some jokes and dialogue I laughed at, the action pieces always felt earned by the context, though not necessarily incredibly engaging. It was a mixed bag, maybe, but it was more just me kind of nodding along at the direction. Not in a “cool” way, but more a, “okay here’s what they’re doing now.” It became very obvious Thanos was going to get the all stones this movie, and equally obvious that it was not going to be fully resolved, so it was really the question of how and where the final action piece would fall.

Gamora’s death was some bullshit. I sort of felt like it sucked out the emotional tension, since this is just big purple dude from space beaming in with stones who doesn’t have any direct connection to 98% of the characters. But even more than that, I was having trouble understanding what they were going for there at all.

I didn’t see GOTG2, though I want to. However, I do know about the familial dynamics with Gamora and Nebula and Thanos. I think Gamora giving up the soul stone location to save her was seeded, at least from what I understand went down. And frankly, I can even track Gamora kissing Peter given the stakes, given she asked him to kill her, and so on. What loses me was why they painted her death as a sacrifice of Thanos’s, because it’s 100% clear this guy is an abuser to her and Nebula, and then even backing out of this, he’s 100% incapable of empathy, which is why his solution to ~famine~ is a glove that can literally do anything (like...you know...make resources more plentiful or increase education about birth control or something), and his solution is still “equal opportunity genocide.”

So that Gamora was explicitly shown to us to be someone he loved to get the soul stone sends all kinds of really dangerous messages, and also does it banking on the believability of his philosophical commitment to thinning the herd. Except that philosophy itself falls apart with minor scrutiny. His planet fell apart because of thin resources, so he can extrapolate that to the universe? And he really believes just arbitrarily murdering half the population would do anything, without addressing birth rates, or power structions, or anything at all?

It was just so, so, so weak as a motivation for him. And I’m absolutely flabbergasted critics are seriously comparing Thanos to Killmonger as two villains with “understandable” motivations. These are two massively different scales of understandability, right?? How is there any basis for comparison other than to say, “wow Thanos is a shitty villain after Killmonger.”?

The problem is, Thanos was the closest thing we had to a movie protagonist, since it was his journey. But there’s nothing remotely sympathetic about what he’s trying to accomplish, or particularly logical, and to have him be the one to “sacrifice” to get there was like...for what? Otherwise we wouldn’t have believed how hardcore he was?

I think how much this movie lands for someone is going to fall entirely on their view of Thanos. I wasn’t impressed and I don’t understand why this is the guy they built towards, and specifically him and the infinity gauntlet.

Because yeah, that damned gauntlet. I really can’t stand unclear power scaling like that. The gauntlet can do anything with all the stones in it, but minus two of them, Dr. Strange can go toe-to-toe with Thanos? It’s just...the fights became increasingly irrelevant because Stones of Random Power so things happen that need to happen just because. They are one of the most profoundly uninteresting plot devices I can think of.

Oh also? Hands down the worst moment was when Starlord was so full of Manpain about Gamora that he ruined Peter Parker and Tony Stark almost getting the gauntlet off Thanos. Just utter horseshit there. Not to mention even going with the mapain, he could have just shot him in the face or slit his throat instead of punching him, and then boom, movie over.

Idk, that moment, along with Gamora’s death earned heavy eyerolls. There are so many more inventive ways to have those guys lose a fight to him, or to have Thanos obtain the soul stone, and I don’t see her dead body being the necessity for any of them. Especially with the soul stone. Maybe Thanos creates some kind of illusion using the reality stone where Gamora thinks she has to get the soul stone in her possession to save Nebula, and then Thanos is able to take it. Idfk. Just...why this?

(Also the Guardians felt super off to me. I know stuff happened in GOTG2, but it seemed obvious they weren’t being penned by their usual writer.)

I do want to address the darkness of this movie. I got one ask saying it was acedia at its finest, and another saying that no, the thesis of the movie was that every life is important (Steve says this to Vision) and we fight for something saving or whatever. I lean more with the acedia anon.

If anyone is reading this and doesn’t know the spoilers, the movie ends with Thanos, having assembled all of the stones, snapping his fingers and killing half of the universe. The finger snap itself is mentioned as the threat and how easy it’d be fore him to do it at least 5 times, so it was certainly seeded. Then, we get a lovely sequence where we watch half the Wakandaans turn to dust, T’Challa among them, along with half the Avengers: bye bye Sam, Bucky, Elizabeth Olsen, every Guardian of the Galaxy except Rocket, Dr. Strange, and Peter Parker. That’s after already watching Vision, Gamora, Loki, and Heimdall get killed by Thanos.

Like yes, everyone knows this is not going to stand. We are shown about two minutes before this charming sequences Thanos going back in time because he has the time infinity plot device, and we also know Avengers 4, GOTG 3, Black Panther 2, the next Spiderman follow-up, and so on are in the works.

Oh except children in the audience. There was a BAWLING 7-year-old outside the theater, and what do you tell them? “Don’t worry, it’s just the Russo brothers doing it because they can, and they want to seem edgy and bold”? It’s not bold. It’s kind of the biggest cop-out possible, because we know nothing is permanent now, it’s probable everyone who died in this is brought back (...maybe Loki or Heimdall or all of the Asgardians are exceptions? maybe?), and it was basically just an exercise in the limitations of the movie medium for comic narratives.

But thank god we got to watch all of our heroes horrifically die with everyone reacting to them. Like good god, the very young Peter Parker had to be given time to freak out about how he feels sick and doesn’t want to go? What was the point of that? Or was that the reserved take, and in the full cut there was actually a death scene for Princess Shuri too or something.

Speaking of Shuri and Wakanda, I do want to say that I think there’s an element of this that’s in poor taste. Black Panther is *still* airing in theaters, and there have been how many pieces coming out about the importance of representation and what Wakanda meant to so many viewers. So the fact that it was in Wakanda when we see half the population dying... Like, I do like that Wakandans were given an instrumental role in end-of-the-world stakes. But then that meant that yeah, you’d watch half of them crumble to dust in that sequence. Yes, you know that half of San Diego is also crumbling to dust, but it’s a little more viscerally upsetting to see it.

And honestly, why couldn’t T’Challa have been a living Avenger in this? Why was his death particularly necessary? The body count of black characters was kind of high across the board when you take into account Heimdall and Sam (and out-of-universe Zoe Saldana as Gamora. Oh and then Nick Fury in the post-credits. Also is Valkyrie implied to have been with the half of the Asgardians that lived, or did she die off-screen? Cause I’m not sure I imagine her *not* fighting back.). I’m not sure if this is a point of contention with viewers for the most part, but there was just something about T’Challa’s unceremonious death alongside half his country where you’re like, “seriously, why is this what they’re showing now?”

Because guess what? It wasn’t an effective ending! We KNOW it’s being turned back, especially given the utterly ridiculous volume of deaths with key characters who we know have movies. You know what would have been a better ending for this? Just...Thanos snapping. That’s it. “You should have aimed for my head. *Snap*.” Cut to black.

There was no reason I can think of to have been this explicit about everyone’s deaths when they’re just temporary anyway. “Hey kids, enjoy your horror-free entertainment!” Especially Peter Parker’s death. That really, really felt like acedia at its finest.

Because part of the thing with acedia, as Gretchen has so eloquently explained, is that it’s a dark kind of writing where nothing really matters, bad shit just happens. And boy if *that* wasn’t the actual thesis statement of the movie.

Steve said that no, you save every life because that’s what you fight for. But that point was heavily undercut multiple times in the film. There seemed to be countless situations where a character had to either kill or consider killing someone they loved for the greater good (or not saving someone they loved, or giving Thanos keys to something really bad). It was utilitarianism vs. the power of emotional connection, and it was constant. Frankly, it was pretty cohesive.

Except magic man got magic gauntlet and did magic thing, so choice was rendered completely useless.

All told, once this movie is put together with Avengers 4, it’s possible there is some message that works to this end. But right now we essentially got half a movie based around an incredibly weak motivation that we know is all going to be back-dialed anyway. But thank god we got to traumatize kids in the name of ~boldness~ in the process.   

Loki gave over the Tesseract but tried to kill Thanos, and got punished for it. Peter pulled the trigger to kill Gamora like she asked and got punished for it. Gamora tried to stab herself and got punished for it. Gamora tried to save Nebula at the cost of an infinity stone and got punished for it. Trying to save Vision didn’t work. Trying to not save Vision didn’t work. 

Nothing mattered. Except apparently Thanos “sacrificing” Gamora. Wow, what commitment to bullshit philosophy and a laughable “solution” to a problem that is at best, temporary in nature.

This was a downer of a film, and not in a way that made me interested to see the resolution. I just want this out of Marvel’s system. It was event comics writing at its worst, and using an event that never could have really worked for this medium with this schedule of releases.

So okay, fine, my thesis statement is: I really didn’t like it. The longer I think about it the more annoyed I am. Had it ended five minutes earlier, I would have had major issues with it, but it would have been more of an “...okay then” kind of thing. Gamora got the shortest end of the stick, from what I can see. But nothing really came together, and the climax with the RANDOM EVIL ARMY was just going through the motions.

Honestly? If I had to sit through this or Dark World again, I’d choose the latter in a heartbeat. That was a mess and often boring in places, but at least the climax was inventive and fun, and there was lip-service to character development. This was just...an event. Can’t wait for it to not matter at all!

[magellanicpenguin]

So cool organization model i just thought of...

Not to be captain obvious, but writing’s really complicated. So when we write, we often fail. When we go looking for advice, however, the advice has a realm of influence that’s hard to put into perspective, especially when it comes to the big boys- character, plot, setting, and theme. Things like phrasing and prose is pretty obviously applied to every sentence, but those four big ideas are so big, that whenever I read something about it, there’s so much going on and no way to look at it so that I can apply it to my own writing systematically. 

(Note: I’m a biology nut, so all this stuff is internalized already and I love it. If this over complicates things, because it is an extended analogy of one complex topic to another, I’m sorry. Ignore me.) 

So I realized if I look at a novel/wip/whatever as a Body, then I would have a way of classifying advice. What I mean when I say novel=body is I’m labeling the different levels of complexity and size with biological terms. 

If the novel is a body then...

The dramatic subdivisions of act 1, 2, 3 or Expo, Rising, Climax, Falling, Reso would be the organ systems. This implies that they do a main function of the novel, but also have a very involved internal structure, as organ systems have multiple organs.

The chapters would be the organs themselves, which do specific functions and have specialized tissues, but still work together and coordinate with the other organs. A chapter involving a woman running away would involve scenes explaining this action, and would logically be followed up by a chapter covering the result of her absence or what she continues to do on her journey.  

The lobes/subdivisions of the organs would be scenes. Lobes are groups of tissue that are identified as contributing to the organ’s function (i.e. the different lobes of the brain) or subdivisions which are structural classifications (i.e. the lobes of the lungs or the different colons in the large intestines). Scenes are lobes because they contribute blocks of information, be it some blurb on the setting, a key character behavior, or a plot-relevant tension point (separate scenes should have at least one of each), which contributes to the overall function of the organ (chapter), which contributes to the organ system (expo, rising, etc.). So that chapter of a woman running away might involve scenes of  domestic neglect, pressure from her friends or family to have kids, solo trips to the movies at midnight just to watch Into the Wild, etc. 

Paragraphs would be tissues. Just as a lobe is made up of one type of tissue (for argument’s sake), a scene is made up of paragraphs. These are the big building blocks, literally blocking in the whatever the lobe (scene) is doing. A paragraph might be a description of what is inside a woman’s purse, and the scene might be a characterization of the woman’s habits, good and bad. 

Sentences would be cells. These are the small building blocks. Each sentence contributes, however small, but the death or cancer of one is significant. They must be in perfect harmony with the cells around them to function and accomplish their goal correctly- the goal of the paragraph. With a paragraph about the contents of a woman’s bag, one sentence might be detailing the bottle of pills hidden in the bottoms folds of satin which loosely line the purse, but the next should NOT be talking about what types of fabric make of her purse (irrelevant) or prescription drug abuse (taking away from the implicitness of the pills, so hidden and secret that the author does not even write what the bottle contains, only that she takes them like multivitamins). 

(This next part gets crazy and is mostly me having fun, it’s not super useful) 

If we must go down to the word level, that would be the organelles inside the cell, with the subject as the nucleus (as the verb is conjugated by ‘order’ of the subject), the verb as the ribosomes/ER/golgi complex, which are all involved in protein expression and the actual ‘actions’ of a cell (enzymes and secretions are all based around protein expression), and you could say the object or whatever noun phrases and adjectives present are the mitochondria, as they explain something about the subject, and thus are the meaning, or power, of a sentence (maybe, im grasping at straws at this point). Hell, the connecting grammar words could be the cytoskeleton, the network of filaments and tubules that control the cell structure, movements, and help organize cytosol division. 

(it’s over, sorry im a nerd)

My purpose is that this model can be used to classify your own writing and writing tips with a system whose relationships are clear. For example, whether to use big or small words is on the organelle (word) level. Whether to use abstract language or concrete similes is on the cellular (sentence) and/or tissue (paragraph) level. How to incorporate dialogue is on the lobe (scene) level. How to write action or the climax is on the organ (chapter) and maybe organ system level. How to write a character arc is definitely on the organ system level. And of course, how to write a novel is on the body level. 

To me, individual writing elements are always addressed separately, allowing for them to seem simple and straightforward. This allows for efficient communication, but doesn’t really betray the internal level of complexity and dynamics with other structures. Such as, that developing character will involve everything from individual words to scenes throughout multiple chapters. This model embraces that inter-connectivity.

One shortcoming, however, is it doesn’t provide a good way of separating the actual topics of setting, character, theme, and plot, and assumes they all function on a similar scale, simultaneously. We know it actually varies. I’ll think more on it, because it is true that different systems in the body work at different rates in different environments... maybe the 4 big ideas could be different stimuli? Like heat, cold, stress, rest. Or each idea has its own body (or age of body i.e. character is teenage years cos they grow so much) each with a specialized system that you can then overlap... idk

At any rate, if this helps anyone, cool. If this is just a cool thought experiment, or maybe you’re now really confused and now terrified of biology, then that’s cool  too. Biology is fucking scary.  

[blizziedoodles]

I firstly want to apologize for only ever typing long blocks of text to bitch about things. Whenever something happens and it hurts or upsets me, it sticks with me for a long time until I finally vent it out and let it go. Happy things I keep close to me because I don’t want to forget them, and I don’t type them out. Happy things DO HAPPEN, I promise. But I’m just not sure how to share them, or if they’re even “special enough” to share. That’s why I don’t have instagram. |D

Anyway, story under the cut, if you’re curious enough to read. 

I’ve had 2 boyfriends in my entire life. They were both online. The first was when I was 14, the second I was 17. Looking back on it now, I accepted the idea of a boyfriend both times for two reasons. 1) I wanted to fit in. Everyone was supposed to have a boyfriend at those ages so I wanted one too. 2) I had just gone through a traumatic experience and needed a shoulder to cry on because my parents kinda suck. The first time my parents had separated, the second time my grandfather had passed away. Regardless, it wasn’t until later that I realized I didn’t really love these guys. I just loved the idea of having a soul mate and having someone else love me. *shrug* The first boyfriend is irrelevant to this rant, I just wanted to share. 

So my second boyfriend, I’ll call him...T, just to keep him anonymous. T asked me out, and I hesitantly agreed because I figured, I like this guy as a friend but maybe I can grow into the love part. IDK It never happened, I was just going through the motions or whatever and I felt super guilty the whole time because he was all mushy and lovey and it made me uncomfortable and I just wanted him to be happy, but I couldn’t bring myself to actually love him like that. 

Then he started in on the fantasy ideas of moving into a cabin in the woods with no running water, electricity, or internet, growing our own food, etc. Like...You had me at cabin, you lost me at no running water. He didn’t want to get married because he didn’t want the government involved, which I get because anti-authority and paranoia and stuff. Then he mentioned putting our brains in robotic fursuits, which was weird but I assumed he was kidding. He was dead serious. There were other things that were just odd, but nothing that screamed danger out loud? I mean, I just thought he was a weird guy, there’s nothing inherently wrong about that. 

Then he got into his fetishes and I was MASSIVELY uncomfortable. Babyfurs and voyeurism. He wanted me to draw his 6 year old character spying on my 6 year old character using the bathroom and I was NOT OKAY WITH THAT. I get the whole art vs real life thing, but I’m still not comfortable with it. After that I tried very hard to be gentle and let him down easy. Tell him that I’m sorry but we weren’t working out as a couple, that I’d tried to care for him in a romantic way, but I couldn’t. That he was more like a brother to me than anything and I didn’t think that was gonna change. I apologized way more than was necessary. 

He tried to beg me and guilt trip me into staying with him. He said he’d kill himself or start taking drugs “like his mother” if I left him. It got to the point where I told him I could not have this conversation anymore and my decision wasn’t going anywhere and honestly, him guilt tripping me made me feel worse about him than before. He begged me some more so I had my sister step in and talk to him because he just would not listen to me and I’m such a bleeding heart that I couldn’t bear the thought of cutting him off and him actually acting on his threats. 

I don’t know exactly how, but he did eventually leave me alone, but I was terrified for a couple years after because he knew my home address. At one point he had said he’d come talk to me face to face so I was just mortified that one day he could just show up at my front door. 

I don’t remember specifically when it happened, but I went on DeviantArt one day and saw a journal from my friend. My friend was promoting his friend’s journal, and normally when he did this it was a commission journal so I checked it out. And it was a journal talking about T. This person who was writing the journal was, I believe, in her late teens at the time. And she was saying all the same things that had happened in my relationship with T. Except apparently he had a temper and threatened some more advanced stuff. I don’t remember the journal, and I don’t want to go through it right now. BUT. One of my biggest issues at the time was that.. T was the same age as me, off by maybe a year. And that meant he was around 22, give or take? And this girl was maybe 17-18? And had been in a relationship with T for a while. You see where this is going. 

That made me uncomfortable. Not only that, but apparently there was at least one other girl who had gone through something similar. So I decided to speak up. I don’t go on witch hunts. I honestly just wanted to share because we had similar experiences with the same guy and it was disgusting. She decided to take it further and basically make a call out to try to get him banned from DeviantArt. Thinking back on it now, I can’t come to a conclusion on if that was the wrong thing to do or not because..it’s such a personal problem for me that I can’t think on it clearly. I certainly didn’t want to deal with him and his behavior anymore, so I personally blocked and reported him. Because I felt like he was a danger to a fair sized group of people on the site. 

He ended up getting banned 4 times on 4 separate accounts. The first account he tried guilt tripping me, and by the fourth account he was sending me outright death threats. I wasn’t the only one involved, but I wasn’t paying attention to the others because TBH once I got involved I immediately wanted to back out. I was in the middle of a continuous panic attack from the moment he sent that first guilt tripping message until my sister forced me away from the computer to go take a shower. 

My relationship with T happened way back in 2009-10. The DeviantArt journal fiasco happened...probably around 6 years ago, tbh? It was before I graduated from college, so it was more than 5 years ago, at least. 

This morning I opened my iPad and saw a message from some random person on DeviantArt. I opened it, and it was someone replying to a message on that journal fiasco from over 5 years ago. Their message just said that I was wrong and the journal creator only wanted people to mass block T so he could get banned from DeviantArt. 

Let me point out that this happened OVER 5 YEARS AGO. I personally don’t think a stalking, emotionally manipulative pedophile needs to be on DeviantArt where the community he’s in is full of impressionable teenage girls. So honestly, even if it was a smear campaign to get him permabanned from DevianArt, I don’t know that I DON’T agree with it. He hurt me and at least 2 other teenage girls.  I didn’t want that to happen again. I don’t know what he told this person, but I do know that it BOTHERS ME that he’s still going around playing the victim card over 5 years later. 

I don’t want to be a mean and spiteful person. I try my best to be kind and open and generous and honest with everyone. Part of me is scared for this person because I don’t know how old they are and he could easily be manipulating them as well and I don’t want that. But I can’t argue this anymore. I don’t want to fight this fight. I want it to be buried in the past like it should be. I don’t wish this person any harm, but I truly wish they could see that, if he told them his side of the story, that’s NOT the only side. In fact, my father is so well known for re-telling a story to play the victim card, but we all know who he really is. I think that’s what’s happening here, but it just scares me to think T’s got another impressionable person in his little fantasy world. 

Ultimately I have to look out for myself. I don’t have the energy to fight all the time. I blocked the person who sent the message instead of replying, and part of me feels guilty about that. But...I just can’t. I’m tired.