#idk if i'll be consistent ever again

[bebemoon]

look for the name FONTAINE (requested by @benevxllain) | art print by emiliano maggi, romeo gigli dark purple pleated cocoon coat (a/w 1992), romeo gigli floral borcade sheer skirt, mirror palais "angel wisp" top in burgundy, zimmermann baroque gold chain belt, vintage italian butter leather over-the-knee point-toe stiletto boots w/ button detailing, joanne burke 18kt gold fountain ring, paloma picasso "mon parfum" eau de parfum in special edition wearable sun brooch bottle, anna molinari kiss clasp black leather handbag w/ logo charm chain

[keeps-ache]

sigh. alright

[no0t2]

sorry i haven't been posting btw. i have been enjoying my time not really having to worry about it lol

[starburstsobsessions]

CATS AND DOGS CONTINUES!

Could it be? They're... friends now???

I hope my points came across well enough! Stone is healed enough now, and is up and moving again. Too much. Cat Rob takes the dog out for a walk and finds out that not everyone is as selfish as they seem, and K9 Stone has had his first sense of real care- ever?

Previous! Next!

Sorry for the 1 million things that I forgot, that I'll see after posting LOL. I think I need to slow down some too because I'm starting to get a little sloppy yk

I tried to convey one million little things in this, and maybe it's a little rushed, but it's just a little comic what can I say LOL. Stayed up late late to do these bc my life has been SO hectic this week 😭 and some got blurry again idfk why it does that after I upload. the crunch levels are too strong. ANYWAY.

Idk what the broken down city's lore is yet. It's become a war zone that Cat Rob has been living in for some time. He didn't cause this though. Idk who did yet LOL Maybe some stuff for later. It's just Vague Dystopian.

Here's the reference pictures of my irl wolf i meant German Shepherd that I used for the running around pictures, so they could be "consistently" shaped LOL

She loves to run more than ANYTHING so I think K9 Stone getting to run around freely would be literally a game changer. I'm not sure if this is a universal Dog experience, but it sure is for mine!!!

[starboyjuno]

next batch of geese🧡 requests from @interclover and @aricatastrophe !!

I would absolutely love more requests! please don't be shy :3 also feel free to request sillies from other shows, especially ii, as ill eventually do a lineup for them as well! again, headcannons below [absolute yapfest & some character analysis] , and thank you for 300+ on my last two groups!

more: pencil/pen/marker , tree/leafy/grassy

notes:

- sb and icy are cousins! their parents are brothers. they're also icelandic so the naming conventions are super interesting! if ur icelandic feel free to tell me a bunch of stuff about ur culture cuz it's awesome but! from what I researched, names need to be approved by a government agency and surnames are patronymic essentially, whatever your father's first name is, you take that and then add '-sson' for male children and '-dottír' for female children :) awesome to me i love research!!!!

- sb and icy's relationship is a bit rocky. they were really close as kids but I feel like they drifted apart as they grew older.. I feel like as of tpot they make friends again and start to be kind and nice

❄️ . snowball :

- i need to kill him😭😭😭

- umm i think. from my interpretation of him, sb isn't like. a blatant bigot, he's just kind of insecure and projects his insecurities on other people.. he wants to be the 'strongest ever' and anything that he deems 'weak' doesn't deserve to be around him.. I think in like. a human ver. of the show it would likely be that he was degraded for not being 'masculine enough' and fell down a bit of a pipeline unfortunately

- he's not . evil though. I think he's an ally in the sense that he don't gaf a whole lot.. he supports his friends who are queer [pen/eraser/coiny] and would dropkick anyone who disrespected them. I also don't think he's a misogynist, he just a freak and needs a lot of therapy

- so sorry but that's a cishet white man 😞

- his relationship with grassy is very sweet to me.. I think that. by the time tpot comes around, he's still a little messy but he's kind of come to terms with a lot of his issues, and does his best to treat grassy the way he wanted to be treated when he was a kid.. auauggh.. the brothers 😢😢 through caring for grassy and being there for him sb grows as a person and becomes softer.. in my mind..

🧊 . ice cube :

- she's autistic to me.. likes the hat because it helps with noise reduction. and the pressure of it feels nice (projecting)

- mischievous ass lesbian bro.. she uses tricky schemes and plots to get her way/j but I do think her whole "revenge" thing is due to some of her anger issues.. [runs in the family or whatever] of which she has many. I think she also has a complex insecurity thing with her consistent feeling of being excluded and left out (esp in freesmart) (wow okay autism)

- idk if I'll give her albinism or not.. I think it's cool either way and if she did her and book could be lack of melanin buddies😭

- consistently cold... you'll always find her in sweaters and heavier clothes poor thing has circulation issues i fear

📚 . book :

- I AAAUGGGHH BOOOKKKK😢😢😢 AUAGSHDYEGUWGH 😭😭😭 sorry I like her a lot .. everything to me.. miss girl...

- consistently overlooked, undervalued, and tossed aside..even when she makes mistakes and even if it takes a while she always manages to apologize and try to stay positive with it.. possibly also an autistic queen everything to me I hope she wins bfdia..

- LOVER GIRL!!! she is so full of love both platonic and romantic.. I feel like she has an unrequited crush on icy as well as a probably requited thing with price tag.. idk I like those ships they're cutesy... at least once, she's crushed on each member of freesmart [except for ruby]..

- german heritage is a nod to the gutenberg printing press because it's funny to base nationalities/ethnicities on that sometimes

- HER NAME IS STUPID ON PURPOSE ITS FUNNY AS FUCK!!!!! BROOKE PAGE IDC

okay that's enough from me I'll add more later maybe if i think of anything else

[yandere-wishes]

just read the latest grayson fic and him with joker and harly’s daughter 😊 it would be so good.

I think wildcard would be good because having a child grow up in the Gillian industry, they would see the fails others have had and she could use them as well so you don’t know what she knows from other villains. And oml giggles sounds like something her parents would call her as a cute nickname💜 I love that thought.

I'm so glad you enjoyed it!! I actually have plans to write HC for all the batboys with their respective villain!Darlings! I'm just not sure when I'll get to it cause Uni is starting up again soon 😭😭😭

I'm not sure what the Gillian industry is (do all of Batman's villains have homes in the same neighborhood? That would make for killer domestic life fanfiction!!!💞💖💞💖) But the idea of her being a "Wildcard" and having been raised on the villains' doctrines. Given the chance to study their shortcomings is IMMACULATE!!! She'd be so overpowered, I LOVE IT!!

────────୨ৎ────────

🂠 She's not just the daughter of Batman's greatest (and scariest) villain, but also an amalgamation of all his rogues. She'd know all his weaknesses before she was even a teenager. Bonus points if she was literally raised by the Rogue's gallery to BE Batman's demise!!

🂠 Joker I feel would be a good dad (I know scandalous thought) there is a joke somewhere in all of this. That you created someone, an extension of yourself to defeat your greatest rival. That it took years of your failure to make a perfect "version of yourself". Someone stronger, smarter, better, someone who is the panicle of all you stand for and want to achieve. Although I can see him being a strict father, one who only permits social interactions with other "freaks" trying to keep her daughter safe from all the "boring sheep" of Gotham.  

🂠 Harley is such a loving (smothering at times) mother. She will definitely teach her daughter all she knows. Heck her first toy is probably going to be a mallet of some kind. Their Mother-Daughter time consists of Gymnastic training and rollerblading.

🂠 Ivy is definitely the Godmother (IDK who the Godfather would be? Riddler may be or Twoface just for the divorced aesthetic with Ivy)  and despite it not sitting well with Joker. She's going to teach the reader about seduction and how to lour in your prey.

🂠 The rest of the rouges help out too. Teach her all they know, raising her to be better than they ever were. I feel like, as the rouges grow older, they start to see the merit in having a legacy, someone to raise and "pass the torch to" kinda like Bats does with the Robins.

🂠 But the irony of all this is that Wildcard!Reader prefers to fight Nightwing as opposed to Batman. Sure it's fun family time to try all kill the bat with her mother and father. But she's honestly more interested in ripping apart the Wisecraking acrobat that somehow knows exactly where she is at all times. The black-haired menace that won't leave her alone, that hugs her a little too close and too tightly when he's cuffing her wrists. The golden boy who stole her first kiss and who shamelessly trails even more kisses down her neck. The "HERO" who haunts her nightmares even when she's home, safely tucked into her funhouse-esque bed...

🂠 Wildcard!Reader is slowly but surely starting to see just why her father is so obsessed with Batman, there is something so disgustingly saccharine about these heroes, something so bright that it crawls under your skin and festers inside you. She wants to see Nightwing dead, to ring his neck with her own fingers, to string him from the tent roof and pluck his teeth out one by one. But while Wildcard!Reader is dreaming up Nightwing's demise, the same hero is watching her through her window, tracing little hearts along the glass, fantasizing about the day she'll be in his arms forever.

────────୨ৎ────────

I think that also adds so much to the story, she was raised to kill Batman but grew obsessed with Nightwing. Legacy crashing into legacy. The one destined to destroy and the one fated to protect.

Her parents shrug it off as a "rebellious phase". Thinking that one day she'll awaken ready to commence on a warpath to Batman. But this hate-filled obsession isn't going away, it grows stronger by the day.

Harley is kinda happy that her little Giggles has found both her arch nemesis and obsession.  

Joker, on the other hand, is...conflicted, on one hand, he's happy that his enmity with the Batman/batfamily will outlive him. But on the other hand, he'd just LOVE to see his little girl finally put an end to Batsy. Albit if she did do that then Joker wouldn't have an excuse to get out of the Bahama trip he's been promising Harley.

Also, I completely forgot about Dick living in the circus, that just adds another intriguing layer to all of this!!

[writingnekoo]

Decided to share a list of my AUs for Odysseus (mostly with implied Ody x Poseidon, but not mandatory). Idk if I'll ever actually write/draw something for them, so here are the concepts.

1. Traveler AU

Calypso makes Odysseus immortal forever, so he outlives his family and friends. This leads Odysseus to the world of gods and mythical creatures again. He encounters many new acquaintances on his way as well as old friends and... enemies.

2. Second chance AU

Calypso traps Odysseus not for seven years but for more than three millennia. When Odysseus reaches Ithaca, it's already the 21st century. Feeling completely lost, Odysseus is forced to adapt to the new world. He seeks the help of the gods, the only familiar creatures left. Along the way, Odysseus finds out about various wonderful innovativations in human civilization (like therapy or raves lmao) and rediscovers his relationships with some of the gods.

3. Monster AU

Odysseus' soul doesn't find rest in the Underworld because of heavy PTSD, so instead of dying, he turns into a horrific mythical creature that haunts all of his past enemies in their dreams.

4. Modern AU (Odysseus/Poseidon specific)

AU, where Odysseus is a guitarist of the niche band that consists of him, Eurylochus, Polites, and Circe. Poseidon is a barman in the club where they usually give their concerts. Odysseus has a terrible habit of flirting with him despite their constant arguments. They continue like that for gods know how long. Members of Odysseus' band definitely don't help with the constant teasing about how the two are acting like an old married couple. A lot of pent-up tension and denial issued ^_^

[dollya-robinprotector]

Idk if this has been answered at all but which artists do you take the heaviest inspiration from (as of recent)??

Your artstyle consists of rounded shapes, which is so cool I added some circular shape language to my interpretation of Robin (thx blud). I'm just curious where that comes from.

if you meant to ask "Where does my Robin soft and round feature's inspiration come from" I'm afraid I don't have an exact answer. For Fem Robin I've said before and I'll say it again that I based her on one of my irl friends. For Male Robin, I think just because I like that body type.

I do have many inspirational artists though. I call them my "idol artists" and I mostly share their info with my close friends when they ask. Here's some first name on the list:

Star Shadow Magician - Long hair, pretty and bb girls, her sense of design is also top-notch, quick sketch, pretty lighting, etc...

Pako - Speed, ultra speed, and an interesting way of using colors

Suzunosuke - Speed and clean sketch. I draw so fast now because I've learned from them ever since middle school.

Kuri Huang, Sainker, Aki - from AFK Arena. I mentioned them in one of my tutorials too. Simply breathtaking.

there's more, but I'm lazy.

[bandgie]

After Everything

virgin!hueningkai x fem!reader

part 1 here | part 2 here

synopsis: You thought coming to terms with how you feel about Kai was going to be the hardest. But how he feels about you is a whole other animal itself.

warnings: MDNI 18+, smut, PIV, no protection (bad), loss of virginity (m!), handjob, nipple play (f!), over stimulation (m!), cock warming (if you squint), slight mentions of pregnancy, emotions, insecurities, kinda angsty, possessive reader, happy ending, idk man

5.2 words (fuck im sorry)

If there was one thing you could count on Yeonjun for, it was his stubbornness. Ever since the little show you and Kai put on for him, he's been consistent in asking for a part two. 

Yeonjun caught you in the cafeteria on campus. He’s wearing a flowy white button-down, sharp clavicle and lean arms on show. It would’ve been truly delightful to see him like this, but you just can't muster the ability to be attracted to him.

"Just one more time! One more, that's all I ask. You don't even have to fuck me. I'll even pay you..." You tune out Yeonjun's begging. It's a little difficult considering he's sitting right next to you, not letting you get a bite of your overcooked pizza in. But there's so many thoughts swirling in your head that it's not possible to pay attention anyway.

You’d done something you promised yourself you'd never do with Kai.

You went to his dorm.

Consistently.

Going to someone's place gives you an insight of who they are. He had a nice roommate, a decent space, and privacy. You told yourself it was convenient to have fun at a house rather than finding a secluded area. 

Wanting that alone time meant something. You didn't want to tease him like this anymore, you didn't want someone to see how he could fall apart at the mere feel of your lips.

He was yours to tease, to touch. No one else should have the privilege of getting a taste of that, no matter how they beg.

"Are you even listening to me?" Yeonjun accuses. 

It takes a couple of blinks for you to focus your attention on him. "If I said no, would you stop bothering me?" He laughs and crosses his legs, "Nope."

You sigh, giving up on your half eaten dinner. Yeonjun is quick to catch your annoyed expression, deciding to take another route.

"You like him huh?"

You turn your head to make eye contact, "Like who?" Yeonjun gives you a sly smile and shrugs, "You know who. I don't know why you're playing dumb."

"I'm not playing dumb," you say defensively. "You're the dumb one." 

Yeonjun chuckles at your little outburst. "No you are. You're blowing me off for Kai. Blowing me off, I'm almost offended. Like, I know you've been distant, but it's not the 'I found someone better and I don't need you anymore' distant. It's the 'I'm head over heels for someone like a loyal dog' kinda distant."

"I'm not a dog!" You yell. A few nearby people look at you weirdly, but you shake them off.

"So you're loyal then," Yeonjun muses. He shrugs again and leans back when you don't say anything. "It's written all over your face babes. Puppy love. With Huening Kai no less, who would've thought. The very same boy you used to slap around, give swirlies in the toilet back in middle school, who you made eat my cum, may I remind you."

You wince at the memories, guilt eating at you from the distant past. You excused your actions by youthful stupidity, by the irrational joy you got when seeing his tears. Even now, you like tasting them. But hurting him isn't how you want to continue. 

"Kai doesn't mean shit," you lie. It's so obvious though. You wouldn't believe it yourself. Yeonjun only makes you feel worse when he keeps smiling like an idiot. 

"Oh, he doesn't mean shit?" He questions. 

You meekly nod.

"Then it shouldn't matter that he's out with some girl then right?"

You sit up straighter and look wide-eyed at Yeonjun, "What?"

Yeonjun picks at his teeth like he's bored, but he has the most amused expression. "Just came back from a bar with Soobin before I saw you. Saw Kai and some chick there, she was chatting him up. Not that it matters though right?"

There's no time wasted when you grab your things. Your bag aggressively slings on your shoulder, almost hitting Yeonjun in the face. "What bar?"

"I thought you said he didn't mean shit?" He teases.

"For fucks sake Yeonjun what bar!" 

Yeonjun glances uneasily at the onlookers giving you dirty looks, but you couldn't care less. You can feel your heart pounding in your ears, the tightening in your chest. You think you might cry out of frustration if he keeps playing with you.

"I'll only tell you if you promise-"

"Yes!" You rise to your feet, seething. "You wanna see me get fucked? Done. Just tell me what bar."

-

Beomgyu's Bar is for college students only. The sun has barely begun to set, so there's not many people in the building. It doesn't take long to spot Kai's black hair peeking from one of the booths. He's with the same girl from the library you recognize. She obviously did her hair nicely, as if she wanted to impress him.

As if it was a date.

Anger boils in you, but you can't will yourself to move. Now that you're actually here, you don't know what to do. Should you go over there and make your presence known? Steal Kai away like last time? Should you just watch and see how things unfold?

That feeling of helplessness settles in your chest, and you feel the unfamiliar sting of tears in your eyes.

This was a dumb idea. You have no right being here, concerned about who Kai’s with. Not after how you've treated him, how you've talked down to him. Still, you can't stop staring at him from across the room.

Kai must feel your gaze because his head turns from the girl he's talking with to you instead. He recognizes you immediately even under the strobing lights. Your eyes widen at the attention, and you scramble for the exit. 

He jumps to his feet to follow you instantly, ignoring how his companion tries  to pull him back down by the sleeve.

"Where are you going?" She asks. "Do you wanna leave? We can go back to my place and-"

"I'm so sorry Anitta but I really need to do something," Kai doesn't even look her in the eyes. He focuses on freeing himself from her grip.

"Now? It can't wait?"

"No," He deadpans. "Can you please let go?"

"But Hyuka-"

"Don't call me that!" Kai surprises himself with the outburst. Not many people call him that nickname, only you've been consistent with the title since elementary. Strangely, it just sounds wrong when someone else says it. 

The sternness in his voice makes Anitta loosen her grip just enough for Kai to run away. There's no protesting as Kai runs out of the bar, his goal set on finding you.

You left merely a minute ago, you shouldn't have gone far. Kai spots you in the parking lot, looking in your bag for your keys. He doesn't know why you were there, or what to say, but what he does know is that he needs to be with you.

Within a few long strides, Kai reaches you. 

He doesn't need to say anything for you to know he's there, you can feel the warmth of his body behind you. With shaky breaths, you slowly turn to face him. You try to discreetly wipe your tears before you fully face him, sniffing. 

"Why are you here? Shouldn't you be with your girlfriend?" You hate yourself for being snarky, but what else are you supposed to do? Fall to your knees and ask for forgiveness? Tell him that you can actually be a decent human being despite the decade of torture?

Kai doesn't let your sarcastic words get to him - he’s used to them. Still, you can see a twinge of pain in his eyes. "You know that's not true," His voice is barely above a whisper. As if he might scare you away if he talks too loudly. 

"Isn't it?" Your voice rises. You don’t share his concern for volume. "At a bar of all places! So what,you get a taste of pussy and think you can get it all?"

Kai looks like his eyes might bulge from their sockets at your crudeness. He shakes his head feverishly, "No! It's nothing like that. She offered to go out-"

You put your hand up, silencing him. "I don't wanna hear it. It's better to have a slut like me to learn how to fuck than go with a good girl. I made it really easy for you didn't I? Here I was, thinking I was being too much of a bitch to you when really-"

"Stop!" Kai finally raises his voice. Your voice dies in your throat. Never has Kai commanded, let alone yelled, at you. There's a certain determination in his eyes that you've never seen before. It makes your heart speed, your legs tremble.

"Stop calling yourself that," Kai speaks softer this time. "Calling yourself...names. I never even thought those things about you. Ever. I mean, I do think about you, but not like that."

Despite being angry a second ago, your chest flutters at his confession. "...You think about me?"

As if realizing what he said, Kai blushes. It takes a moment before he nods, eyes finding the asphalt beneath his feet. "Yes. A lot actually."

You're still hesitant about it though, "Because I'm a bitch to you?"

Kai's head snaps up and he shakes it again, "No! Not at all..." He trails off for a moment, as if reconsidering what he said. The pause makes your heart clench. You should have known. Years of bullying would always stick no matter how much you sucked his dick.

"Well, you are...mean to me," he confirms. "But it's more than that. I kind of want you to do that to me. It's weird, and I honestly think there's something wrong with me. I just wanna be your dog sometimes."

Now it's your eyes that widen, a small laugh escaping into the air. 

Since being with Kai more, you've caught on that he tends to say outlandish things. You would pretend that it was stupid and make fun of him for it, but you've always thought it was cute. 

"Sorry," he gives you a sideways smile. "But it's true. Whether you treat me like a cat or a dog, I just wanna be with you. Yes, you gave me a hard time growing up. And yes...a part of me is still scared of the next thing you'll have me do."

You open your mouth to reassure him that it won't happen again, but he beats you to it.

"But I'd do it. I'd do it again even if it meant brushing my teeth for hours. If it meant having to buy new underwear all the time because of the stains. None of it matters to me except you."

"Hyuka..." You can taste your tears on your lips. You don't deserve this, him. Yet here he is, using his shaky hands to wipe your tears.

"I'm serious. If you don't want me to see her again I won't. Just tell me what to do-"

"No," you choke back on your sobs. "Hyuka how can you still want me after everything I've done to you? I'm a horrible person. I've made you do horrible things. I've treated you horribly. Even now, I ruined your date and made it all about me."

Kai's warm touch is soothing to your wrecked state. You can hear cars pulling up and people walking. If they're watching you and Kai, he must not care to notice. His gentle grasp on you stays, his eyes never leaving yours. 

"You're not a horrible person, and you didn't ruin anything. I've been trying to find an excuse to leave anyway. You saved me if anything," Kai admits. 

Your hands clasp over his, your thumb stroking the back of his hand. You both stand in silence, letting your breathing even out. Kai is patient as ever, softly humming under his breath.

That's another habit you've picked up on. You can sometimes hear him sing in the shower, when he's choosing a movie to put on for background noise.

"Oh wow," Kai sounds in awe. You blink a few times to see him looking up, and you mimic his movement. The sun has nearly fully settled, giving the sky a beautiful blue hue.

"It's the blue hour," he says mindlessly. "Isn't it beautiful?."

Your gaze settles on Kai's features. His strong jawline, the little bump in his nose, his full bottom lip. "Yeah," you agree, eyes fixed to his face. "It is."

"Hyuka," you call him after a second. His eyes move away from the sight, but the look of awe never leaves as he looks at you. "I'm sorry." You can feel your tears build up again. "I know it's not enough, and I don't think there's anything I can do to make up for what I did. But I'm so sorry. I wish I could blame it on the fact that I was stupid, that I was drunk. But I can't, and I won't. I'm selfish, I'm mean, I'm messed up. There must be something wrong with me too because I still want you after everything."

"There's nothing wrong with you," he whispers. Kai tenderly kisses your tears away, licking his lips. "Or maybe there is, we can be messed up together."

You giggle at him, playfully smacking his chest. "That's such a loser thing to say."

Kai laughs with you, pearly whites glistening in the setting sun, "I was hoping you'd think I was a lover."

You shake your head, still keeping the smile on your face. "So now what?" You question. "Do we kiss or something?"

Kai only shrugs, "I'll do whatever you want to do."

"We should go back to my place," you reason quickly. "It's getting cold out here."

-

His lips are on yours the second you closed the door to your apartment. Kissing Kai is nothing like anything you've experienced before. He’s shaky, messy, uncoordinated, and you love every second of it. You wonder why you never kissed him before. 

You lead him towards your room, both of you tripping and slipping off your shoes. Hushed giggles filled the air as you finally opened your bedroom door.

It’s then that Kai decides to have some decency, "You don't have roommates?"

His lips are swollen and flushed from kissing. Your eyes catch how his hair points in all directions from the previous makeout session in the car. 

You roll your eyes and slam your door closed loudly. "What about it? Take off your pants and get on the bed."

Kai is quick to listen to your directions, fumbling with his belt as you lead him to the bed. 

His hands tremble from anxiousness, struggling to unclasp himself. You take pity on him and sit him on the edge of the bed, falling to your knees. 

"You don't need to rush, Hyuka," you soothingly tell him. Your hands run up and down his thighs, trying to get them to relax. "We can take things slow. Plus I've already seen your dick. A little too late to be shy about showing me that, hm?"

Kai gives you an apologetic smile and nods, "Yeah sorry." You hear him take a deep breath and slowly let it out. Once he's calmed down enough he looks down at you and nods again, a sign to keep going. 

Carefully, you remove his belt and toss it on the ground. You maintain eye contact when you unbutton the top of his pants, moving down to lower his zipper. Kai keeps his eyes trained on yours, a habit you had taught him whenever you gave him head. 

He lifts his hips upwards so you can pool his pants around his ankles. You eye the tent in his boxers, licking your bottom lip. 

"This all for me?" You tease, using your hands to play with his waistband. When he doesn't answer, you pull back on the elastic on his underwear and let it go. The snap sound echoes in your room, and Kai jolts from the slight stinging sensation. 

"Yes! Yes it's all for you." His voice is whiny, eager to be pleased. 

Maybe you should go easier on him, you had a heart to heart with him less than an hour ago. Still, a part of you feels like you've been going too easy on him in the bedroom. Here he is, expecting pleasure from you the moment you bring him to your place. 

You've made Kai quite the whore. 

This is his first time fucking, and that knowledge alone makes you back off from your usual antics. With a smile on your face, you shimmer his boxers off. You can see his ears turn red when you coo at the sight of his hard cock. 

"It's so hard. I can't believe it's like this when I haven't even touched you. Thought you'd get tired of me." You speak mindlessly. 

"I always get like this when I think of you," Kai confesses in a small voice. Your chest blooms with butterflies, returning his blush. "And I'd never get tired of you," he quickly adds. "Never."

To show your gratitude for his words, you grasp his cock in one hand while you place your other hand on his thigh. You stroke him gently, moving to engulf his tip in skin before dragging it down. Kai hums gratefully and grips the sheets. 

It doesn't take long to hear the slick from his pre-cum. Your whole body starts following his strokes as if you're riding him.  Saliva starts to pool in your mouth from watching your hand get all the attention. Still, the emptiness in your throat isn't enough to stop. You love seeing his face twist in pleasure, the way his neck looks when his head is thrown back. 

Unconsciously, you begin to bounce on air. You pussy clenches around nothing, dripping with arousal. You're neglecting yourself from what you crave, what you need. It's been a long time since your pussy has been stuffed. Excluding Kai's tongue and your fingers, there hasn't been much action going on. You couldn't picture yourself sleeping with anyone so long as you were seeing Kai.

Now you’ve been given his dick on a platter, his tip an angry red with bulging veins. Experimentally, you bring your hand upwards to rub the head of his cock. Kai writhes in overstimulation, his hips jerking backwards to escape your touch. 

You hum, understanding. "Sensitive huh? You think you can take my pussy next?"

There's a little spark of panic in his eyes, but determination overpowers it. "I can take it." Kai fidgets with the blankets nervously, "I dunno if I'll be any good."

You take your hand off his length and rise to your feet. "You don't need to be good, Hyuka. Just lie there like a good boy and I'll do all the work." Your fingers grasp the hem on your shirt and you lift the material over your head. 

Kai has seen your boobs before. You've let him place his dick between them and use it like a fleshlight. He never gets bored of the sight though, and his dick jumps again in excitement. 

You throw the blouse in the same direction of his belt. Teasingly, you cup yourself and massage your breasts. "Your turn."

Kai hesitates in taking off his shirt, but seeing you playing with your tits encourages him to do so. He doesn't try to think about how you're staring at him as he tucks his arms in the holes and lifts the shirt over his head. 

To praise him, you reach behind your back to unclasp your bra. 

You take a few steps closer to Kai so his face is in your chest. He looks up at you as you place a nipple in his mouth, needing some type of stimulation. He obeys, sticking his tongue out to taste your skin. 

His lips suck on your bud, moving his hands to wrap around your bare torso. 

Kai's tongue flicks against your nipple, making you moan. He switches from one boob to the next, unsure of which one to pay attention to. Kai settles for taking his time on each one. 

He notes how you whine when he sucks harshly, how you arch your back further into him when he captures your nipples between his teeth. Kai watches as your skin turns purple from his bruising, a sense of pride swelling in his chest. 

Your legs begin to tremble from the feeling. You keep a grasp on the back of his head to keep him close. The desire between your legs grows stronger. Your patience wears thin as you start undoing your jeans. 

Kai backs away to let you get fully undressed. He kicks his pants off from his ankles and helps you shimmy out of your underwear. 

Both of you are completely nude, exposed. It's a whole new sense of vulnerability. Before, clothes were a way to establish power. You would keep Kai either mostly clothed or naked from down under. It gave you a sense of superiority over him, but that's the last thing, if at all, that you want to feel from him now. 

Instead, you want to feel his body on yours. His hot skin kissing your own. You might always want to take charge in the bedroom, but you don't think you could ever look down on him ever again. 

How did you ever do it in the first place?

You place yourself on his lap, pushing him down by his chest to lay him on the bed. His chest rises and falls rapidly, mouth slightly open to catch his breath. You shush quietly, an attempt to calm him down once again. "It's okay, Hyuka. I'm right here."

Some seconds pass before you place yourself above his hips. You hover over him, knees either side of his waist. Your hand reaches down to grab the base of his cock, angling it towards your entrance. Kai's hands are still fisting the sheets, but you tell him that it's okay to grab you instead.

He listens and takes ahold on your hips, sinking into the bed further. 

To let Kai get used to the feeling, you run the tip on his cock over your pussy lips, letting your arousal gather. The warmth of your sexes makes both of you moan. 

"It's so warm," he notices. You giggle and look up at him, "It's even warmer inside."

Rather than looking nervous, Kai smiles back at you expectantly. 

You take that as a green light to take him in. Slowly, you push the head of his dick inside. The crown spreads you slightly, and you have to bite your bottom lip from moaning too loudly. Kai whimpers at the first feel of your pussy, his grip tightening on you for a second. 

You sink on him a few more inches before moving back up, letting your cunt adjust to his size. There's slight pain on your part, but you're so wet that it's far too easy to slide back down. The ache only mixes with the pleasure each time you take him deeper.

Kai seems to appreciate you taking your time. His hips stay on the bed obediently, taking in the feeling of your walls gushing around him. It's not until you sit on him fully, your ass to his thighs, that he cries out. He swears he sees white from the tight pleasure, the way his cock fits snug in you.

Perfect.

With trembling thighs, you let yourself settle on Kai's girth. He's stretching you out fully, and you swear you can feel him deep in your stomach. The depth makes you twitch and squeeze around him, eyes rolling to the back of your head. 

You trail your hands upwards so they rest on his shoulders. "This okay?"

Kai opens his mouth only to moan in response. He's babbling nonsense, but he's nodding rapidly. You can make out a few yes's and a string of curses, making you laugh. Experimentally, you rock your hips on him. The movement makes him whimper, his hands falling further down to grip your ass. 

You set the pace, lifting yourself a few inches up before dropping back down. The feel of his cock dragging inside of you sends shivers down your spine. There's nothing you wish more than to bury yourself deep in his cock, spasming around him. You think you could cum from just squeezing him, but Kai is practically drooling for how you're riding him.

It doesn't take long for the pace to pick up. Especially with how his fingers are digging into the flesh of your ass, itching to pick you up himself just to slam you back down. His hips start thrusting upwards to meet you halfway. 

Your breasts bounce from the force, a series of moans leaving your lips from every thrust. Neither of you care about how loud your thrusts are, skin on skin. If anything, that sound mixed with the wet slapping spurns you on more. Kai picks his head up to watch where you both connect and his dick disappears inside you, imprinting the image into his mind .

The sight alone makes Kia's balls tense. You're so warm, wet, and tight for him that he can feel his release getting closer. Thinking about finishing inside of you is beyond what Kai could have ever wished for. Making you his in any way possible, painting you in his skin in the most vulnerable way. 

It's then that Kai realizes you both have missed a crucial step. 

"Condom!" He chokes out. "C-condom. We didn't...we didn't..." Kai stutters from the power of his orgasm. It hits him so suddenly, his eyes sting from tears. It's embarrassing to cum so quickly, yet how could he not? You just feel too good.

If you heard Kai, you paid no attention to it. Instead, you help him ride out his high. You can feel his cum bury itself deep inside you, hoping to get you pregnant. He came a lot though, as expected from a virgin. Some of it slips out and drips down onto your bed. Not that you mind - it's kind of cute. 

Your hips slow when Kai's moans settle down. He seems to like you rocking on him gently, milking him for every drop. Kai blinks up at you as a few tears fall, making you clench around him.

"I didn't mean to," he sobs. His hands trails up back to your waist as he cries. "I'm s-sorry. I really didn't-"

You shut him up by leaning down and placing a soft kiss on his lips. His cries muffle, but he soon starts kissing you back. Kai presses you closer to him at your taste, finding solace in your touch. You pull away gently, watching how he chases after your lips blindly.

"There's nothing to be sorry about Hyuka," you console. Your hands trail up and down his chest lovingly. "I wanted you to, I liked it."

"Y-You did?" he sniffs.

Nodding, you tell him, "I did. So you don't have to feel bad. We can take care of it in the morning." Kai nods at you, though his eyes still look unsure. 

You decide that you won't have the opportunity to cum tonight, lifting yourself off him. 

Kai's touch surprises you when he keeps you still on his softening cock. "But...you didn't..." He looks up at you shyly, pressing his cock deeper to get his point across. 

You mewl at the feeling, tensing for a moment. "It's okay. We don't have to, I know you're tired."

Despite his sleepy eyes, Kai shakes his head. "I'm not. Use me. I can still be good for you."

Kai gently thrusts his hips upwards, not as deep but still enough to make a whole new warmth of gush leave your pussy. There's no way in hell you can deny yourself from pleasure any longer. Even if his dick isn't as hard, you can still use him, like he offered.

Kai hisses from how feverishly you begin to bounce on his cock. He's still so sensitive, but your need to cum outweighs the care for his own pain. He needs to see how you cum around his dick. Even if you rub him raw, fuck him for hours on end, the feeling of your cunt dripping with your cum around him is all he can think about.

Tears once again prick his eyes, and your hips rock faster upon seeing them. Kai's length is so hot and slippery in you, you can feel your orgasm approaching you quickly. The warmth in your belly builds, chills covering your body.

Still being the obedient boy he is, Kai doesn't stop fucking up into you. Not even when the tears fall down his cheeks or the moans are tumbling uncontrollably from his lips again. You swear you see his eyes go crossed from the overstimulation, spurring you on further. 

No matter how nice you'll be with Kai, no matter how much love you'll give him, seeing him cry will always be your favorite sight.

The building of heat in your stomach finally bursts, flooding your orgasm on Kai's cock. You twitch and moan when you cum, clenching harshly on Kia's abused dick. Kai rocks his hips against you to ride out your high, mimicking how you did for him.

You steady yourself on his shoulder before collapsing on him chest to chest. Both of you breathe raggedly, sweaty bodies mingling with each other. You both pay no mind, opting to stay still instead. 

Nobody makes a move to pull Kai out of you. Not that you wanted to, it felt rather nice to have him inside. 

Silence falls over you two as you steady your breaths. It's as though the world stopped moving. All you can feel is Kai's embrace as he wraps his arms around you. You snuggle closer to him, planting a brief kiss on his chest.

"How are you feeling?" You ask, lifting your head up to see him.

Kaipeers up at you, looking thoughtful. "I feel...thirsty."

You adjust yourself so that you're supporting yourself on the palm of your hands, preparing to get up. "I can get some water-"

"No. You stay here, I can get it." Kai easily lifts you off his dick, both of you whining at the loss of contact. He sets you beside him and sits up, grabbing his clothes that he hastily puts on. 

He gives you one last look before slipping out of your room. You take this brief time to collect your thoughts, your feelings. 

Or so you try until your phone goes off. You sit up to search for the device on the floor, spotting it near your pants. You crawl off the bed, legs aching from being in one position for so long. Once the phone is in your hand, you climb back in bed and open your notification. 

Yeonjun: i expect my compensation within the next few weeks

You groan, hating yourself for agreeing to his terms. There's no time to think about responding when Kai walks in with two glasses of water and a towel he must've found. 

You shut your phone off and welcome your new lover back in bed. You'll have to worry about your promise to Yeonjun another time.

a/n: and thats a wrap! thank you so much for reading this little series and I hope you enjoyed it! I did *slightly* hint at an epilogue, but we'll see if I actually do it. huge thanks to @then-make-me for editing and revising!! this was defo a chore im sure! thank you so much!

[motorsportbarbie13]

an update

i feel silly doing these bc on one hand i'm like 'eh who tf cares about what my plans are for writing the next few weeks/months' and on the other hand, i know i hate when authors go from writing consistently to radio silence so...idk. it feels self indulgent and a touch self centered.

but i digress

i'm tired guys. tired of pouring my entire creative soul into these fics and not seeing the engagement. i've whined and moaned about it enough so i'm sure you're like 'jfc shut tf up and get over yourself' (which i mean, fair lol). the thing is, i do write for the love of writing but i also don't want to waste my time if it's not well received. there is something so depressing about spending HOURS on a chapter and having it barely break 100 notes. i know it sounds entitled and it probably is but thats how i feel. its not anyones fault and i know my writing isn't going to be for everyone. it's just...frustrating to go from writing very well received/popular fics to...nothing.

i don't know what's changed that's effected my engagement so much but i've tried everything to capture that magic that my early writings had on here and nothing is working.

i feel wrung out creatively. and also i've noticed a spike in my anxiety around social media lately. i've deleted almost everything off of my phone. and its FREEING. like, i tend to hyper fixate on something to the point where it's just not healthy for me and i think i need to take a bit of a break from online spaces, F1 spaces specifically. i'll still be HERE on tumblr but that's about it.

so what's next for the next few months for me? im going to take it easy, be kind to myself, let the inspiration come as it wants. i have a kernel of an idea for a lando fic but i won't be posting it at all until it's completely finished. probably later this summer. i have plans to work on a little collab project with another writer on an oscar fic too. that'll probably happen later this summer too. and i'm going to rewrite A Package Deal as a OC fic that goes deeper and is longer. That will be posted on AO3 sometime this summer too. i'm also wanting to go and work on the novel i wrote last summer and get it ready for publishing? my goal last year was to have it ready to publish by this summer break in august but i won't be ready for that, so new goal! next summer, the goal is to have it published.

so like, i'll still be around. i'll still be here. i'm still writing. i'm hoping a bit of an absence will maybe reset my algorithm too? lol maybe the tumblr gods will be kind to me again in a few months?

anyway. sorry if this is cringe and embarrassing. i just needed to kind of get it all out. my asks are open if you ever want to chat. <3

[bookwormwithadhd]

so my nlmg review / meta / rant / idk what this is im just gonna put my jumbled thoughts in here

i started never let me go because... pondphuwin, plus the plot seemed interesting, and let's say they both didn't let me down, the first more than the latter. but i do have a bunch of criticism for it and things i wish they had done differently.

I'll start from my favourite things about Never Let Me Go:

First of all, the freaking OST. so far NLMG has the best OST in any thai bl I've watched. It was so contextual, beautiful, weaving in and out of focus when it needed to, had a big role in setting the mood of so many scenes, in creating tension and resolving it. The songs chosen in many of the romantic scenes were super fitting and all had a similar vibe somehow. The OST helped hold this entire show together so well. I really need to save a bunch of the songs from the OST to my playlists.

Second thing, the cinimatography of the show. From start to finish, NLMG consisted of so many aesthetically pleasing shots. All the visuals were amazing, and served the plot and themes of the show so much. The colour grading of the show gave it a very nostalgic feel. The scenes that showed confidence were so powerful, the scenes with the sweet moments were so soft, the scenes that showed desire were so strong and heartfelt. Honestly the director of the show did such a good job. Also thematically a lot of shots showed the class difference and social hierarchy, as pointed put by @biochemjess in this post, by using levels and the characters positions in the scenes. Or the lighting discussed by @respectthepetty in this post. There are a lot more thematic things that were shown through the cinimatography but im too lazy to analyze them all. All in all, I loved how each and every scene was so put together from visuals to music to acting. Good job jojo.

Third, PondPhuwin's INSANE chemistry, and their amazing acting in general.

I'll start with Phuwin. He did so well portraying Nuengdiao's character. It was so satisfying and awesome to see it from the subtle body language to the big emotions. Phuwin is so good with big emotional scene's ™ it literally gives me goosebumps. He was able to show the softness yet the rage in Nuengdiao, all the pain but all the happiness, all the immaturity and maturity displayed by him throughout the series. The freaking confidence after coming back from the island, and the uncle kit confrontation scene were so powerful, so well acted and vital to Nueng's character arc, and Phuwin did them flawlessly. Some of my favourite scenes that showcase Phuwin's brilliant acting are the rooftop fight/breakdown scene (it was actuallyone of the first scenes i saw a clip of before i watched nlmg and i was like nah i gotta watch it), the fight/break up on the beach scene, the putting-palm-to-sleep-and-running-away scene (might be my favourite scene ever even though it's so sad), the comeback feom the island and taking his rightful place as a heir sequence, the palm getting shot sequence. Like, oh my god, again, goosebumps. Have I mentioned how good Phuwin is in big emotional scenes???

And Pond... that guy, he's probably one of my favourite thai actors ever. Pond has a certain feel, a certain texture and genuineness in his acting that I can't put my hands on, but oh god, do i feel with every role he plays. His acting has a flavour that I really love. He does geniune, sincere, devoted, softly strong like no other. I saw his acting in We Are first, and honestly it was so surprising to me at the beginning how different Palm's personality is from Phum's (they do have their similarities, but in the beginning of nlmg, Palm was so diff). This showed me how much range Pond has. The hesitance, the politeness, the strength yet softness, the sweet confidence, the micro expressions and the not so micro expressions, they were able to paint Palm's personality so well from ep1 directly. His devotion to his work and to Nuengdiao were so prevalent in every look on his face. His conflict of wanting becoming closer to Nueng but also wanting to (more like having to) do what his father wants him to do, was so well acted. And all the confidence Palm gained at the island arc, when they were in the safety of the island, free like the sea, away from expectation, it was so beautiful to watch Pond act that. Some scenes that highlight what im talking about are the scene in the hospital when Palm confronts his dad about not caring about him (then we see Tanya hugging Nueng just after Palm got slapped by his dad and like kahskajmaj), the scene were he sees Nueng kiss Ben, the shooting class scene ("love is much more powerful than hatred" YEAH TAKE IT FROM THE GUY WHO IS FULL OF DEVOTION AND DESIRE), the scene when Nueng humiliated him at the party (i hate the scene but Palm's face, Palm's reaction, Palm's heart breaking... its powerful), Palm coming back to confront Nueng after the first breakup. The list goes on.

Now PondPhuwin together? it's fucking ART okay? it's so beautiful in all its shapes and forms. All the longing looks, every stare, every piece of dialogue shared, every touch, the tension was there, very strongly. It was so there you could feel it through the screen. Then all the romantic scenes, all the sweet ones, they served. The fight scenes were so good. The soft scenes were so good. The angsty scenes were spot on. The comforting scenes, the hugs, the pain, the tattoo kiss (i will never be over that), the way their relationship goes through so many different stages and so many different dynamics and they did each one of them so fucking well. I honestly will stop talking about this because i could write a 100k essay just about how much i love to see them together on the screen. You guys get me, right????

Anyway, another thing this show did right was FEMALE CHARACTERS. I can't stress this enough, but I'm so tired of shows that give the most 2D, weakly written, unlovable female characters only. And here we got three well flesh out, well written important female characters. Starting with Mrs Tanya, Nueng's mother.

If you saw my post after watching ep 1, you saw how much Tanya caught my eye and attention. And that didn't stop as the show went on. She is strong, loving, caring, but flawed, and oh do i love that. I live that she isnt perfect. I love that we see how much she tries to do her best after her husband's death, how confident she is managing the business and stating her terms and boundaries, and how much she tries to protect and care for Nueng. Was her way of doing that right all the time? not really. but that makes her realistic and makes sense for her character. She unconsciously puts pressure on Nueng for being the only hope for the Kiattrakulmethee family, just like his dad did, and unknowns makes Nueng's relationship with Palm more strained with the promise she made Palm make. But over all, we see a genuine caring mother, that fixed her mistakes by the end and tried her hardest to be successful. (Also she is gorgeous??? i can't not mention that. plus her stylist slayed)

Up next is Maggie!! she was such a pleasant and very very needed character. She helped in Palm's development by being a very good friend. Im so grateful they didn't make her flirty with him all the time and the usual not being able to read the room and trying to get in between the mcs. Nope, we got a genuine friend, who had an initial crush on Palm (i mean look at him, who wouldn't??) but then realised the story, recognised so many of Palm's internal problems and gave him much needed advice and support. They were so cute to see together, and i loved the scenes were she was talking to Palm about what she wants to do with her life, and asking him about what he wants to do with his. I think there was something beautiful there because we saw so much of Palm interacting with people from higher class, poeple who dont understand an integral part of his character, and then we see him talking to maggie, who is also working class, who is also trying to navigate her life and live it to it's fullest job after job. Idk why i liked that this much. I love Maggie, she deserves the best.

And finally, the character i thought i was gonna hate but i loved immensely, Palm's mom, mama Mam. We meet her, as a mother who doesn't know her son, a selfish mother that left and loves her family on her own terms. But them once her son comes back to her life, she steps up to take her role as a mother, and boy does she do good. What we saw of her in the few episodes she was in, was so important. She embraced her son's presence fully and read him so well, gave him advice and supoort he very much needed, gave him a safe place and so much love (for him and his boyfriend), and then as a final tribute, sacrificed her life for theirs.

Her character portrayed the complexity of motherhood, of love, of life. The thing she told palm about life not being all about love explained a lot about her character, and is kinda true. So yeah i love how well written she was.

Now, for side character appreciation we get CHOPPER! You dont get how much love I have for him. He is a green flag, no, a green forest and literally such an perfect character. Perth's acting>>>>>>>>>>> The fact that Chopper faced all that conflict alone, had to choose between jailing his own father and becoming complicit in his crimes, it's heartbreaking. Even Ben wasn't by his side at that point. He was so alone, yet he did the right thing. Love a character with strong values. I love that he didn't have any negative feeling towards Nueng, despite all their parents' conflicts. And him confornging his father? badass, even if he faiked to stop him. Him shooting his father? BADASS.

[maliland]

RESENTMENT: PT. 1

"i gotta look her in her eyes and see she's had half of me." part two

barbie(s): e-42 miles morales & black fem reader includes: flashbacks/backstory stuff, angst, infidelity, homewrecking, & heartbreak (men being disappointments per usual) synopsis: you used to describe your experience with love as one of complexity and simplicity all at once, but after you learn what your boyfriend did at a party with another girl while you were at home and sick, your heart is left with irreparable damage and an abundance of resentment. wc: 2669 banner credz: @/cafekitsune

a/n: first fic on this ho 😓 nervous. idk if i like this so i was procrastinating.. but lmk what y’all think! 🫣 i’ll post a post a poll the end of the fic. if y’all like it then i’ll finish up the second part and post it whenever i get a chance. i haven't proof read, but i'll fix any mistakes when i do.

(nd let me ease your nerves: this is not a fic where miles cheats on reader w/ gwen. she isn’t included in or mentioned in this part or the next 😭)

unfaithfulness might as well be a disease. not one that can be contracted, but one that stems from within. 

those who are unfaithful are unequivocally the weakest links. you? you've always presumed them to be snakes that were to join lucifer on earth at the very beginning of time, because they'd rather cause havoc and jeopardize how those they love perceive them rather than relish eternal peace in the clouds. had adam and eve left the forbidden fruit alone, the one thing that those unfaithful could've stayed faithful to was their identity as whispering serpents. alas, that's not how the story goes. and for the sake of free will, god decided they should reside on earth with those who know nothing but faith. 

betrayal isn't limited to one kind of person. whether the relationship is romantic or platonic, anyone can smile in your face, only to turn around and drive a pre-sharpened knife right through your back when you least expect it. you're left to bleed out while you try and make sense of why it had to be you.

you've been double-crossed before, but never bad enough to the point where you needed to make a huge deal out of it. it was usually stupid stuff, like your elementary friends ratting out your genius hiding spot during hide and seek after they got found, or your mom revoking her promise to take you to the park that one day after school when you were younger. your ex-best friend from middle school spreading nasty rumors about you was far more serious than all the other instances, and it was probably the worst one until now. 

you know that girls and guys alike get cheated on. you've heard stories and even seen it happen firsthand. infidelity occurs more frequently than you initially thought it did. then again, you tried not to think about it much because you were positive it would never happen to you. ever. especially not with your boyfriend, miles.

that was your first mistake—thinking you were immune.

you wanted to gauge your eyes out when your best friend video called you and showed you that photo of miles kissing another girl in a bedroom at a halloween party. 

the girl you were once worried about.

❤︎₊ ⊹

when you were younger, you were in love with the idea of being in love. 

many of your earliest memories consisted of your father reading you fairytales right before bed, since your mother was never around to do so. when he learned that you took a liking to stories that were more centered around love, he began to look for various fairytales pertaining to such that he could read to you. you adored how the love interests would always end up together by the end of each and every story. after enduring all the conflict getting in the way of their relationship thriving, it felt like a reward. you always felt secure knowing a happy ending was guaranteed no matter what transpired throughout the story. you liked that security, but your obsession with it inevitably flawed your perception of love itself. you grew up under the impression that love in the reality in which you reside wouldn't be all that different from the fairytales.

it hurt you when you finally discovered that that wasn't the case. in eighth grade, you had asked your crush to the winter formal. he had harshly rejected you, cracking the most heartless jokes in addition, in attempt to impress his friends, who were indeed laughing up a storm. that encounter alone was enough to ground you to earth. you discovered how disappointing the world and its inhabitants truly were, and how the unrealistic fairytales you once swooned over would never be real life. maybe it was insane of you to ever even think so, given the perilous city you live in.

seeing as dating these days is more detrimental than beneficial, during your sophomore year of high school, you decided that you'd steer clear from being romantically involved in any way, shape, or form entirely. of course, the universe always sends you someone or something you stopped wishing for ages ago when you least expect it. maybe something you didn't even long for anymore at all. you were perfectly okay with sticking to romance novels. you sure didn't want to put your peace on the line, especially not in the name of romance—but someone changed that.

miles.

you knew of his existence before you started dating him, but only briefly. you had an algebra class together your sophomore year, but the boy was quite reserved, only speaking when spoken to. trying to keep to himself and stay out of your school's public eye completely backfired on him, because he became the topic of everyone's conversations multiple times for a full week after his father, the former police captain, passed away. 

officer morales' death was a humbling reminder that brooklyn would only continue to grow more and more minacious. you haven't gone for a walk at night by yourself for as long as you can remember. you'd either be mugged, killed, or both. on the streets of new york, there was peril lurking around every corner. the city has more loose criminals than you were able to count on your fingers. you got used to living in such an environment, but your arm hairs never did stop shooting up whenever you had to step outside.

you recall giving your condolences to miles when he returned to school two weeks later. he had just nodded. you couldn't blame him though. everyone was constantly reminding him of something he'd rather not think about.

if he wasn't reticent and constrained to silence before, he was sure as hell was now. you tried your luck with him anyway, though.

whenever you'd see him sketching in his sketchbook in algebra, you'd compliment his skill or ask him what he was drawing. maybe it seemed a little invasive at the time, but your heart was in the right place. 

"i didn't know you could draw," you whispered to him. your desk was right next to his, so ignoring you wasn't really an option.

"yeah."

"that's cool, art takes skill—and patience," you had smiled.

"mhm."

you fell into a routine of asking miles what he was drawing every day in class. he was undoubtedly annoyed by it at first, but he eventually got used to it, and you finally got more than a one-word response. it was this conversation in particular that changed the way miles saw you.

"is that the prowler's suit you're drawing?" you whispered, surveying the page.

miles nodded and responded flatly. "yeah."

"i think it looks cool. i really like his suit design," you retorted. "especially the purple."

"you do?" he stopped drawing completely and looked up at you.

"hell yeah," you expressed with a faint grin. "he may be a criminal or whatever, but you gotta admit, his suit and his tech are pretty neat."

so then you two were friends for a couple of months. you'd do things like eat dinner at his house, help around the flat, and study together. surprisingly, miles' mom, rio, took a liking to you. she even taught you how to cook, and would let you assist with fixing dinner. 

miles had it was rare for his mama to warm up to people as fast as she did to you, and that made you feel special.

within the period of time in which you and miles would hang out, you ended up catching feelings for him, which you pushed to the side without a second thought. you still firmly believed that a relationship would bring you nothing but trouble. what you didn't know was that miles felt the same way about you as you did him, and eventually, he decided that he couldn't hide his feelings for you anymore.

miles confessed to you one night under the water tower on the roof of his apartment complex. you'd been watching the sun go down together and talking about whatever came to mind. you could've gazed into his perfectly sculpted face until the end of time. you doted on the way his eyes glowed gold when the sun hit them just right.

"you helped me open up. i didn't think that was something i was capable of doing anymore," he had told you. "i really do like you, [name]."

though you were terrified of putting yourself in a position to be played, you didn't want to say no, so you didn't. 

for the two years you've been with miles, you've never not trusted him. he's never given you a reason not to. he's always treated you like royalty, practically kneeling at your feet like being in your presence was a reward all by itself—at least that's what you felt like being his girlfriend equated to. 

it's no secret that miles tends to capture the attention of numerous girls without ever even having to try, whether they went to your school or simply passed him by on the street. miles didn't even have to lift a finger to have them drooling.

when you two got together, you didn't announce your relationship to the public like you were some kind of celebrity couple. that didn't stop people from gossiping like you were, though. according to everyone who went to visions, "miles and [name] popped out with each other out of nowhere!" and that was okay with you. nobody needed to know the ins and outs of you two's relationship. unfortunately, the obvious fact that you and miles were together didn't stop girls from constantly trying to have their way with him—one girl in particular was more persistent than the rest.

you'd be lying through your teeth if you said it didn't bother you at first, because it made you sick to your stomach. the thought of miles leaving you for one of those girls was one you couldn't bear. 

you vividly recall standing beside miles while he was situating his books in his locker before a girl who was well-known around campus, arielle, approached your boyfriend on the opposite side and 'not-so-subtly' flirted with him like you weren't even there. it was no secret that she didn't like you, so you were stuck between trying to figure out if she actually liked miles or was just trying to get under your skin. all you knew was the way she was twirling her perfectly spiraled, bouncy, brown curls around her index while she bit her lip bottom had you undeniably heated. 

"so miles, i've been learning how to braid hair," she had said. "honestly, i think i've pretty much mastered it. i want to practice cornrows... problem is, i couldn't find anyone with the type of hair i prefer to practice on, but then i saw you!"

you had to turn around and face the opposite direction just to hide the distaste that hastily painted your once-neutral expression. you brought your arm to your mouth and coughed twice so it wouldn't look like you were turning around for no reason. when you turned back around, arielle was looking you dead in the eyes, like you had done something horrible to her. you were surprised that she decided to give you even a fraction of her attention instead of acting like you were a ghost altogether.

you returned the energy, narrowing your eyes to slits. you weren't going to go toe to toe with another girl over a boy who was clearly yours. you had just redone miles' hair not even three full days ago, so she'd had to find another guy to practice on.

you shifted your gaze onto miles as he closed his locker. he hadn't even said a word to arielle up to that point, or even looked at her. when he finally made eye contact with the girl, she smiled innocently, as if she wasn't trying to murder you by burning holes through your skull with the way she was staring at you. 

you were no longer bothered by the time miles turned his head to look at you. the way his face was twisted was more than telling, with confusion written all over it. you read that boy like a book. 

"i mean, come on," arielle giggled. "you'd be the perfect person to practice on."

this girl didn't know when to stop. you were silently growing furious, wishing miles would take your hand and drag you away from that foolishness, but no. instead, he chose to engage in conversation with arielle.

"what do you think of my hair now?" miles asked.

this made your stomach drop, but it didn't show on your face. instead of saying anything or trying to figure out why miles cared what this random ass girl thought, you stood still where you were, waiting for the worst to be over. at the time, you and miles had only been together for about five and a half months. you didn't expect your first relationship to end that quickly. if this conversation didn't wrap up soon, you were sure that your head would start spinning and you'd pass out on the spot.

"of course! the two braids always look so good on you. i love them," arielle angled her head and leaned against the locker next to miles'.

"so do i," miles smirked, snaking one of his arms around your upper back to the shoulder furthest away from him. he pressed his palm against your arm and gently urged you closer to him, pointing to you with his free hand then looking back at arielle. "my girl got me right the other day, and she did a damn good job."

a smile crept up onto your face. for only half of a second, you didn't want to come off like one of those annoying moms of five who got the last 75" flat-screen tv during black friday and rubbed it in everyone's faces in the checkout line, until you remembered who's boyfriend miles was.

yours.

you had bragging rights.

"thanks, miles," you looked up at him, smiling brightly as any and all doubts left your mind. your eyes soon met with arielle's again, who was in disbelief. it seemed that you'd exchanged expressions. you were the one geeking now. 

"damn, i'd say gossip doesn't spread like it used to, but the looks you were giving me tell me you know we're together and don't care."

arielle shifted her weight off of the locker, crossing her arms and rolling her eyes. she was never one to admit, let alone accept defeat.

"girl, c'mon. don't be lame. miles wouldn't cheat on me. it's even crazier that you thought he'd flirt back while i was standing right here."

"have it your way, but he's gonna crack."

with that, arielle scoffed, opting to leave the situation alone for the day. that wouldn't be the last time she tried something like that, and it probably wasn't the first either. you just happened to be around to see it that time. it made you wonder how miles reacted every other time. you were also quick to question why she claimed miles would "crack." it rubbed you the wrong way.

"she's jus' talkin' outta her ass, hermosa. she likes attention," miles assured you.

for whatever reason, that response alone didn't satisfy you. you had an uneasy feeling in your stomach for the rest of the day. you remember calling miles that same night while you both did homework. in the midst of the comfortable silence that had settled, you decided to bring up how you felt about what had happened.

"i won't lie, earlier today, i was a little scared," you admitted.

"of what?"

"i thought you were gonna ditch me for arielle," you replied, letting out a deep sigh at the same time.

"i'd never," miles promised you. "te amo, chica. and only you. i'm with you for a reason."

"i love you, too," you grinned, genuinely feeling at ease. "i was just paranoid. i know now that you'd never do that to me."

the invasive thoughts that often crowded your mind and kept you up late at night; the ones listing each and every reason why your relationship with miles would crash and burn? they haven't bothered you since then.

©maybemymali

[fritzes]

well my fellow sunshine enthusiasts, it's time. the iw draw is out (~2 hours after it was promised to come out lol) and here are my thoughts:

atp:

jannik got banned and it seems that as a result this top quarter decided to be as chaotic as possible. I'm not quite sure how tsitsipas is the 8 seed, I know he rose in the rankings after dubai but I didn't realize he rose that much. however, both tsitsipas and zverev (who is the 1 seed and has been flopping hard since ao) are both historically terrible at this tournament. also in this quarter is machac, who just won his first title and is in great form, frances, matteo b, humbert, and holger, who is... holger. he made the quarterfinals last year (and beat taylor along the way) but he's been in poor form and very ill lately so I don't know if he's gonna be able to replicate that. gmp could make a splash here, and poor cursed tallon griekspoor is once again stuck in the draw of a top seed. I think this quarter is very hard to predict. I'd give machac a very good chance to make a deep run here

there is a lot of potential in this quarter. casper and daniil being the top seeds is kind of fascinating because they both have the same vibe of "frequent slam finalists who are the best in the world some days and absolutely terrible other days", and they haven't played since 2021. however, I think the odds of both of them making it to the quarterfinals are very low. tommy paul, like everyone else, was ill in acapulco, but if he's fit I could see him having a great run here, he came really close to making the final last year and just barely lost to daniil. arthur fils hasn't been doing much lately but his draw seems pretty open and he could make something happen. I'm also very curious to see how alex m and nishesh do here, they're both in daniil's section and considering what happened last time he played a californian next gen player... I'll just leave it there. I think one of casper and daniil will find some form and make a deep run, but not both

I am going to be so objective and rational about this quarter trust me guys I can do it. so, taylor fritz. obviously this is one of his best tournaments, and he had some injury issues in the past few weeks but in withdrawing from acapulco despite being in playing condition, it's clear how serious he's taking this tournament, but he's probably also feeling a lot of pressure to win it. so, as always, it's a question of getting out of his own head. other than him, this quarter has a lot of players who have been up and down lately: ben seems to be incapable of locking in against anyone who's name isn't flavio cobolli, andrey randomly won a 500 amidst some poor form, jack lost to andrey in the final of said 500 and is probably grateful that it won't be too hot in iw (but not grateful that felix is in his section), and learner is going from beating the literal world #2 to losing in straight sets the next day. like alex and nishesh, I'm curious to see how learner and joao fare here, the next gen have really been on a roll lately

and finally, yet another alcaraz/djokovic quarter. this time, though, it's coming on one of carlos' preferred surfaces. and I honestly think that a lot of what happened at the ao was mental with carlos, and if there's one thing about iw, it's that it consistently boosts carlos' confidence ever year. he has a decent draw, although shapo might randomly peak again. grigor is here, but he's really not in great shape right now and I don't think he can put a run together. on novak's side, adm could cause some trouble for him, especially on this slower surface. I feel like before every tournament, I'm like "oh novak is injured he probably won't get far" and half the time I'm right but then the other half he makes the semis or something. this tournament last year was where his first... idk, questionable loss was, so I'm very curious to see how he'll do. I can't see him beating carlos at iw, but I've been proven wrong before

interesting r1 matches: kecmanovic/griekspoor, arnaldi/kovacevic, etcheverry/mensik, fearnley/fonseca

interesting potential r2 matches: ruud/giron, michelsen/cobolli, medvedev/basavareddy, rublev/arnaldi, tien/shelton, draper/fonseca

wta:

honestly, I don't think aryna could have asked for a better draw. she's the top seed, and she got a top seed draw. jasmine hasn't had great singles results lately, and she seemed to be struggling with injuries in dubai. iva jovic is right in jasmine's draw, and honestly I think she's primed for an upset, she's been playing some great tennis on big stages and managed to hold her own against elena at the ao. dasha loves this surface, but she does not love playing against aryna. bia and leylah are as inconsistent as always, and to be perfectly honest I think the biggest threat in this quarter might be alexandrova who has been on a tear. but all things considered, this should be an easy draw for aryna. the issue is, aryna really hasn't been playing well since the ao. this is a tournament she's historically done well at though, so maybe she can get back into the groove of her hardcourt dominance. if she plays like she did in australia, she'll make the semis easily, but if she plays like she did in february, she's going to be struggling. I think getting through a long gritty match (like her match against peyton at iw last year, for example), will do a lot for her and I think maybe kessler could provide that in the second round. but I do think this quarter is her's to lose

the draw really said let's take every top american woman (except jess) and throw them in a quarter together. right now, coco has the same problem as aryna, in poor form since ao, but unlike aryna she doesn't have the benefit of an easier draw. madi is back, her first tournament as a slam champion, and she is way more well rested than everyone else. emma just won a title without playing a single three setter, which might be a miracle. and amanda won a 1000 and is at a new career high, which has certainly given her a lot of confidence. also in this quarter is diana, who's been a little shaky lately but is still one of the best up-and-coming players on tour right now, donna, anna (who isn't even seeded after dropping those dubai points), and the iw specialist maria sakkari. with the way she's been playing, I don't think she can make a deep run, but I thought the same thing last year and the year before that so maybe she'll prove me wrong. I think coco is gonna have a really tough time here, and some upsets might really help her out

is this how I find out jess is the fourth seed? apparently. she's been maintaining her ranking very quietly, always consistent, and those uso points are gonna be keeping her up there for a while. she just won a title and seems to be in great form, but peyton stearns in the second round is not what any top seed wanting to play short matches wants to see. on the other side of this quarter is elena, who has just been impossible to predict lately. I could see katie or mirra beating her. mirra especially has a great chance to make a run here, I don't see anyone in her section who could trouble her except maybe naomi, but I don't really know if she's playing well right now. elina, danielle, and of course penko could also be wild cards in this quarter, but I think mirra or jess making the semis is likely

oh boy oh boy. they put the chaos in the first quarter for the atp and they're putting it in the last quarter for the wta. iga, the defending champion, probably the favorite to win the whole thing, but she had a pretty rough start to the year, losing the united cup again, losing in the ao semis after having a match point, losing to penko again in doha, and then losing to mirra in dubai. I think she really wants a title right now, and even though this is one of her best tournaments, that might get in her head. of course, this is iga we're talking about, she's also very likely to breadstick and bagel everyone. qinwen is in this quarter, and she also had a terrible february (at this point, who didn't?). I honestly can't remember how she is on slow hardcourt, but the fact that I can't remember that is probably telling. I think she could very easily lose to linda in the third round. the middle of this quarter is totally stacked with marta, paula, karo, yulia, and ons. I think the semifinalist from this quarter is either going to be iga crushing everyone, or someone from the middle

interesting r1 matches: stephens/kenin, raducanu/uchijima, osorio/osaka, kvitova/gracheva, krueger/volynets, stearns/linette

interesting potential r2 matches: jovic/paolini, gauff/raducanu, danilovic/sakkari, anisimova/bencic, kalinskaya/shnaider, tauson/osaka, kvitova/andreeva, stearns/pegula, zheng/azarenka

[moirindeclermont]

It's day 23 and it seems fair to announce I'm going to do until day 30 and then taking 3/4 days of pause - maybe some memes will sneak in (I'm writing a bigger fic for the 31 but idk if it's going to be ready by the 31th). Later today I'll post my ideas for November because I want your input as well, like always.

Prompt for today is non genital orgasm and multiple orgasm 😈 (this could also be counted as a first time we didn't see)

" I bet you can't make me come without touching my core," as soon as the words are out, Pen realizes her mistake.

Never tell a Bridgerton "I bet you can't", they will haunt you the rest of your days until proven wrong.

This case is no different.

Colin is watching her with a big smile on his face, as he gets close to her with a clear goal in mind. She shivers. Pen knows that Colin is nothing but determined when it comes to her pleasure.

They are in bed, so she hasn't a stay on. Better for him, because he just lifts her nightgown to expose her and kissing her nipples. She sighs, as she relaxes against the headpost, his other hand going to harder her other bud.

"You are going to eat your words, little minx," he says with such confidence, as if he's in a secret that she has no clue about it.

As he rolls her bud on his tongue, she feels the first clues of pleasure in her belly.

"Especially when you have the most exquisite pair of t1ts I've ever seen," he adds as he bites lightly on her left, the right one being pinched. Oh... She might be in trouble.

"And I have all the time in the world to make you come like this," his head gets up for a moment to give her a kiss before returning to it's previous position.

After a while, he switches, as she lets out a moan. He continues like this, switching every 2 to 3 minutes, until she can feel her wetness.

She moans, gripping his hair. Her bosom has never been so sensitive. It's like someone strapped a thread between her chest and her core, and now every single thing he does it's like she is experiencing it there. She pushes her hips, begging for a more direct stimulation, but he is not giving her a thing. "Last thing I want is you telling me I cheat," Colin says, before deploying his secret weapon.

He takes the nipples in his fingers and rolls it.

She buckles under him, as she feels herself getting closer and closer.

"See, my love, when it comes to your pleasure, the key is building up and consistency. If I keep this up," and now he is rolling both of her buds, driving her crazy, "you'll going to come soon."

Pen gasps as her release takes her. She feels her core clutching around nothing, as her head swims in pleasure.

"And since I won, I get to decide the prize," he says taking himself in hand.

He opens her legs and finds her soaked. "Just perfect," he says giving a kiss to her pearl, before pushing inside her. She comes again. She has never come so fast in her life. "Yes, Pen, squeeze me like that," he waits until she is calmer before thrusting into her again. "So wet for me, always so wet for me," kissing her and touching her chest again, now so sensitive she could come again just from that.

He makes her release again with his length.

"Now, I already won, but I'm an overachiever, would you not agree?" He grins as he takes that opportunity to touch her with his tongue. Pen is asking herself if someone can go insane from too much pleasure. She feels another wave coming and she can only grip his head as her hips moves against him.

"Last one," he says and Pen is not even understanding words at this point. He drives into her again and she just sobs at that point, as Colin hits her spot inside and release right after her.

He is so smug when she opens her eyes again (she didn't even realized she had closed them). He kisses her and touches her chest. "Too sensitive," she says to him and Colin just gets up, picks a towel, using it to slowly and carefully clean her, making sure she is comfortable.

"I should remember to never bet with a Bridgerton," she tells him and Colin chuckles.

"You should remember you are a Bridgerton and you can ask for a rerun," and that's the moment Colin realizes the mistake he made.

[ether-doll]

Idk why I'm feeling like posting this but I am so (putting it under a read more just kinda because I know not everyone who is here is concerned about this kinda thing)

My 6 year ex. He claimed to be on some yan4yan shit. He was not.

I displayed my clinginess, he wanted none of it. So I stopped. He said he would do whatever it took to make me happy- which several weren't unreasonable asks BTW and also things he agreed on when I moved in with him. He would then proceed to flip that right around and whenever I genuinely asked or begged him to do something he would hit me with bullshit excuses.

So then he's gonna pin every single issue we have on me. Because he failed to deliver on just about every promise he ever made to me. And then claim I'm not communicative enough despite the fact I would communicate just to be brushed off. And I'll admit after a point I did actually stop communicating but it's not like I'd be listened to either way

I turned my entire life upside down for that asshole and wasted six years. Six of them. I moved 2 states away from where I lived and any family I had that I cared about was 12+ hours from me. What the fuck

Also he openly admitted to starting arguments because he was bored. I consistently communicated I hated arguments. He did it anyway.

He would get on my ass if I told other people about his shit too in like an objective way because suddenly I was the bad guy. Then again anyone he ever told the same shit was always on my side of the argument. Guess what he got mad at me for that came up in arguments completely unrelated a lot.

Also this is tmi but I'll keep it vague enough. He knew I was a genderfluid switch getting into this relationship. Only when I was both in a masc swing gender wise and in a dom mood did he ever find me attractive. And he also said vaginas squick him out other than his own. Man what. You knew I was afab, genderfluid and a switch. What the fuck. AND he thought I was just DEAF because he would talk shit about me to other people. Relevant to this section just because one of them was I was too stupid to know when he wanted sex. Coming from the guy who was "all cuddles lead to sex" and "why don't you hold me anymore".

I still don't know why I was with him

[drdovaqueen]

Kinda vent post idk just-

My romantic and sexual existence is a damned tragedy and catastrophe. I've been asking out women, enbies, men, and all other manner of individuals for years now and I'm just so tired of taking the initiative. The only times I haven't been rejected is when I knew the other person liked me, which is a very leading position to be put into anyways. All I want is to be approached in a nice, respectful, genuine manner for ONCE in my damn life. There is no jest here, not once in my 21 years on this earth have I been approached by someone in any respect. I was kinda flirted with in grade 7 by this girl in my class that I had a huge crush on and that's the closest thing I've ever recieved. What sucks too is that I think I'm really fucking cute, like look at me-

Like I'm a straight up veritable cutie pie, so much so I've had a friend tell me I'm transition goals more than once. And it's not as if I'm odious or uncharismatic either, yet the evidence leads me to believe that sonething must be wrong with me if I'm so consistently undesirable. Either I'm not as pretty as I think, I'm not as personable as I think, I'm not as good of a person as I think, I'm just really unlucky, or some amalgam of these factors. If nothing else, I can get cuddles from one of my besties whom I love very dearly, but I fear that one day they'll be sick of me and then I'll have nothing. Alone again, as I so frequent am.

Thank you for reading if you've done so <3 I've replayed some DOOM Eternal tonight and now I'm going to bed after I finish writing this I am very tired