#idk if it's late as balls. i need to remember to post my art more MNJHDHFBHF

[skitskatdacat63]

Back in my monthly depression era ig but. Thinking about social media and art, and how their relationship has fucked with me. I'm glad I started drawing fanart and I don't regret it. And I think I've really improved my skill this past half year plus. But man it gives me such a terrible complex. That paranoia of "who even would give a shit about this" and "when will people be done with me."

I think any artist always craves some recognition and praise no matter how much you say you draw for yourself. You can draw for yourself but it's still extremely gratifying and inspiring to have people's approval or thoughts on it.I used to draw for myself more and draw so much random art, but I discussed it a lot with friends and it made it more gratifying, to have that interest. And I lost that kinda, a lot. I feel like for a bit btwn losing that and drawing fanart, I can't really remember, I didn't draw as much bcs it just felt a bit unrewarded and it felt bleh.

And then I started drawing fanart. Which felt very rewarding. I'm happy I've not ever really felt the desire to make widely "appealing" art. If you look at even the first things I posted, it's extremely niche, and that's been a lot of fun! But it's also just made me so paranoid and self conscious. What if people get tired of this. What if people find it strange. What if people find it annoying. What if I'm being repetitive. Etc. It's really irritating bcs I KNOW people have told me they find my stuff interesting and that they like it. But my brain can't help but think, what is the expiration date on this, when will it become boring. I discuss my art with people and it's fun, but that self consciousness clings to me like a parasite. Like ah I better hurry this up and enjoy it while I can before they get annoyed and tired of it.

I guess this is all to say, I don't always like my relationship with art, and I hate the way social media messes with your brain. I remember for a bit I would post my art on Instagram and do the whole hashtag game. And then realized it was messing with my relationship with art so I dropped it. And then did the same thing with Twitter, than dropped it, etc. I just hate how I can't let myself enjoy anything. Idk maybe I'm just burnt out or something, but whenever I think of drawing lately, there's just this voice being like "what's the point of even drawing this, why would anyone care." I hate you evil voice in my brain!!!! It's not even a thing about notes, and I feel greedy even simply admitting any of this. I think it's more of a craving of a deeper connection and discussion. Which is what I always seek when I create art. But social media makes you think about numbers and attention and makes it unhealthy and makes you feel guilty for wanting something that's pretty reasonable.

Blah blah blah anyways don't reply to this like, oh you need to fix your relationship w art by taking a break from socmed! It's just this continual cycle and maybe one day I'll break it. But sometimes it just hits harder some days. I just want to stop feeling cringe. I hate it cause internally I'm like "I am cringe but I am free" but that only has to do with actually creating the stuff. Posting about it is the trap I think. Again though, it's natural to crave discussion and approval, but putting myself out there makes me want to curl up in a ball. I miss the days when I was younger and creating all kinds of random art and forcing it upon people with absolutely no shame. But now it's like. I toss my art into the room and shut the door and hide behind it with bated breath. And it often feels like any conversation I have just sates me for a tiny bit and then I go back to feeling empty. Is it ungrateful? Or is it just natural to want to keep having and partaking in a good thing?

Someone sent me advice on this feeling at some point, about how its better to talk to people individually rather than just on main. And I agree! I had a lot of fun the last third of last year. And for some reason it's just felt different ever since the new year began. I just don't know how to recover, and to start having fun like that again. I've drawn a lot of things I've immensely enjoyed since the year began, but for some reason, which I can't really parse, have had way worse self loathing and insecurity about it all. I just wanna recover my joy back :( is that too much to ask

Tldr; yay art improvement! Complex ideas! Much discussion! However: nay! Makes me feel cringe! Makes me feel like I'm running on limited time! Makes me crave too much!

[yakocchi]

After-Hours, He’s a Man (VIP) // Eisuke

yes, the original title is closer to “the (side of) him during the late hours (of the night)” but we have fun here

it’s me, ur eisuke stan in denial. i am still in denial, this guy sucks

this VIP Room Event focuses on the top-ranked charas of the 2020 Election. so there are CGs for 6 of the Kings (tsugaru had his own separate event) and everyone gets stories. the stories are a touch two-fold; the His POV ver. of the story is a separate item, so if you want both for a guy uh. good luck. esp gl if you like ayumu or toshiki bc theirs are SR. i guess cuz theyre second and third? i think? look i barely know the king 7 as it is... i had to stare at my id card just to remember who’s in the group

completion prize are alt. art versions of the 6 Kings’ CGs, which is just an alt expression. for eisuke thats prob just a ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) face. idk the me with 40 more bux to throw at this and worse luck would know i guess

since kbtbb seems to be on the backburner until next yr (until further notice, the only kbtbb stories for the rest of the yr will be eisuke special stories) i figured id ramble abt the relevant stories (eisuke and soryu) i guess

please credit if you take any of this stuff, much appreciated (･ω･*)

spoilers behind the cut!!

so the soryu one (think this is the first post-wedding story of his btw, wow) starts with the MC waiting in the living room for soryu to return from work. she falls asleep but wakes up upon hearing the door open. she’s embarrassed that she fell asleep like a kid so she pretends to still be asleep. he’s like aww waifu and then kisses her hair and carries her to bed. then he gives her another kiss and tucks her in. the entire time mc’s like waaaaa husbando so sweet. he vanishes to the bathroom and then she’s like waaaa i did not know that’s what he did every time i pass out

next morning soryu’s like tonight im gonna return home late again so just go to bed before me k. but then mc’s doing step 3 of the scientific method and going, if i pretend to pass out again, he will do the cute stuff again probably

cut to nite. she pretends to be asleep in her bed. soryu comes home, takes a shower, and then finally crawls into bed. just like mc hoped, he gives her a head kiss. to hide her reaction, she turns her back to him. but then in doing that, he gives her a hug. he straight up starts breathing down her neck and now it’s getting very hard to pretend to be asleep. then he starts unbuttoning her pjs and puts his hand on her waist?? uh oh pervert in the house. pervert who apparently isnt that sleepy at 2am after a hard day of morally questionable work. red alert, a mega pervert

well the pervert nonsense escalates by a lot and obviously MC eventually makes a noise. soryus like gotcha and then is like, tell me why u were pretending to be asleep. mc confesses that she had also pretended last night blah blah she just wanted to have waaa cute husband moments soryu did not know she was asleep last night. but then he’s like well i have my own confession to make. when i see ur defenseless sleeping face, i cant help but want to dote on u, kiss u. so then naturally i end up wanting to put u to bed and stuff. soryu’s embarrassed abt it but obv mc likes it so it works out then they bone a lot the end

now eisuke’s story begins with the mc spacing out at the penthouse. eisukes like HEY and then mc realizes eisuke’s calling for his coffee. the others wonder if he even says her name (or if he even needs to say it). mc wonders if he has a certain standard on when he’ll say her name. so while theyre doin sexi stuff, she’s like “Eisuke… I like you…” “Mhm.” “...I love you… Eisuke.” “I know.” “I like you…” “Pfft… You’re like a broken toy.” one of the members of the popular characters clique, everybody

shes trying rly hard to get him to say her name. obv he knows what’s going on and isnt gonna do it easily. blah blah extended sexi stuff and then while hes balls deep he says her name. “If you heard what I had just said… then whisper your love to me until I’m satisfied.” fin

whenever this VIP comes out in engl, make sure to try ur shot at getting stories like this! i cut down on the sexi scenes cuz i assume thats the appeal of getting these stories

also cuz i mentioned it earlier and i dun think it’s worthy of a separate post, this is wat the id card looks like

i got this several months ago. it was free if u had the membership to their niconico channel (so not rly free). cute if u actually live in JP, otherwise was annoying to ship this dumb useless thing ahah. there’s a space for ur name on the back, but cuz i signed up for it like a day or so before the cutoff i dont think they had time to print my name on it lol… o well

as always, thx for readin!!

[cyanoscarlet]

alive, awake, alert

(Or, in our language, "conscious, coherent, cooperative".

Not enthusiastic, though. Much too late in the day for that.)

Felt physically fine after my bout with COVID last month. Was immensely demotivated for some reason, though. Always retired early everyday despite not being sleepy at all. I knew I was wasting time by not working on my slowly-piling academic output (hello, 0% written Graduation Thesis), but I couldn't muster the motivation to drag my ass to my desk beyond 9pm.

Today's the first day I properly set up my workstation. I already feel fulfilled. Hope this is a sign things get better for me again. I really, really, really need to get my shit together.

Last three months in residency - crossing fingers.

- (more rambling under the cut)

- Since I don't want to bother making another post anymore, have some more words from moi while I still remember my Tumblr exists lol.

-

Twitter Presence

Or rather, my sort-of lack thereof. The accounts are still up, but I haven't posted at all in months, for those who've noticed. Been busy IRL, and I find Twitter's pace too fast and too toxic for comfort these days.

Funnily, around once or twice a month I'd decide to end my Twitter hiatus and post just once to get the ball rolling, but every time I'd log in, the timeline would overwhelm me so much I end up nope-ing out again, so.

cyano scarlet

*** WIPED AND LOCKED. It's there only as a placeholder now. *** I don't really have a fandom account anymore. *** A lot of things happened- mainly drifting from the BSD fandom and the friends I made on it, for almost the same reasons I left the YOI fandom in the past. For a while after, I kept getting the nagging feeling that I really shouldn't have given in to my over-enthusiasm over BSD back then and made that damn account. *** Engaging in fandom made me lose confidence in my writing again for a while, then I became so busy with IRL (residency) that I eventually lost interest in writing fan fiction altogether. (That I'll write about as a separate post when time allows- got a lot of thoughts to unpack and unravel regarding my relationship with creative writing in general at this point. I hope this is just because I'm worn out from residency and not a sign of something deeper going on. IDK.)

choon xie

*** It's the public version of my IRL account, minus all the specific self-incriminating stuff, as well as all the fandom-related stuff. *** Originally just a "nom de plume account", but it's now basically just "me" except with a different surname. (My IRL surname's a whole boatload of complicated I don't want to explain again and again to people anymore. *** When I locked cyano scarlet for good, I decided to not complicate things anymore. Being my IRL self means I can and should be able to talk about and retweet whatever the hell I want on MY space, so if I want to talk about fandom or other non-mainstream / professional (MD) / original writing-related stuff, I'd do it all as "me" and not as some partially-sanitized version of myself. (i.e. "Oh, Doc Therese is a fujo / fangirl / stan / whatever?" Yes, She Is. Deal With It.) *** That said, it's currently DORMANT / ON HIATUS. Too busy.

Real IRL Account

*** My REAL account. Also my very first one- had it since college, so around 11 years ago. *** It's the unfiltered version of choon xie, including but not limited to: specific self-incriminating stuff, regular breakdowns over residenshit, Anxiety and Depression(TM), petty whining, and more. Locked private ever since, for a reason. (That said, I whine about everything on Tumblr these days, so yeah everyone knows now anyway - if anyone's even reading.) *** Followed only by people I know IRL, and fandom / online people whom I consider close enough to let into my "real" world. You know who you are. *** Also DORMANT / ON HIATUS.

-

Aerial Arts

Ah, yes, happier life update. I've started taking Aerial Classes at a pole dance stuido!

I actually took some classes in 2018 as a graduation gift to myself after med school. I wasn't actually working yet then, so I only limited myself to what I could afford with my meager allowance + red envelopes saved through the years. The day I filed for my medical license, I swore to myself I'd attend regularly and pay for it all myself.

(Then, of course, pandemic happened, and everything closed down. And of course residenshit's obviously an energy-draining bitch, but apparently I'd sorely underestimated how busy it could get, despite people saying Family Medicine's "just an easy program". Was only able to adjust properly now, sometime in the middle of senior year.)

So far the class I'm taking most regularly is aerial silks (tissue). It's the apparatus I was most drawn to in 2018, and for some reason I find myself gravitating back to it. (Also, silks classes for beginners are every Saturday, and I'm almost always available only on Saturdays, so there's really no other choice lol.)

Of course I also equally enjoy aerial hoop (lyra) and aerial hammock. They both involve a lot of spinning! Thing is, those classes happen on days I'm not available (just for now in residency!), so I don't get to attend them as regularly as I do aerial silks. I plan to attend classes for both hoop and hammock when I graduate, since I don't have hospital duties anymore by then - and hopefully will be earning more than I do now!

There's also pole, of course, which is actually the most popular class there! (Obviously.) I have my reasons for not doing pole - but who knows?

(Another reason why I'm not on Twitter or Tumblr anymore is because I'm using my Instagram again! Funny things is that I used to be inactive there instead, in favor of the two abovementioned sites, but now it's the reverse lol. I post all my aerial class videos there, despite it being locked to only IRL people.)

-

I believe this has been long enough. Have work tomorrow.

[mingot-studios]

Things currently polluting my mind (will be added to as i think of things)

 How bad the Star vs. Finale was, and weather i should even bother trying to watch the show again at this point

The fact that the next JoJolion chapter is coming out soon and I STILL haven’t read 107 with my mom even though I’ve already read it

Not being caught up on One Piece and having 0 IDEA of whats happening at this poin as well starting to flaws with the series (racism, transphobia, and homophobia) that i knew was there but chose to ignore and weather it should hinder my relationship with the series. Also wanting to murder Oda for demoting Franky to ‘Pervy Grandma’ (srsly wtf oda)

Upset Infinity Train was cancelled even though i never watched it, and wonder why the fans cry for it to come is suddenly not happening?

The fact i’m going to be returning to in person schooling which is my personal HELL

my brother leaving for college upstate (Me and my brother have never really been that close, we fight alot but I cant imagine life without him)

The fact that my procrastination has gotten so bad that I nearly had to retake PE, World History, and English

The Owl House coming back on the 12th but i had downloaded the first 2 episodes but haven’t watched them and debating if i should, also having a meltdown  over Disney screwing the show over and having its third be 3 or 4 (i cant remember) 44-minute specials

The fact that me and brother STILL haven’t finished our Yume 2kki Let’s Play

I haven’t been watching anime regularly with my mom

I haven’t posted anything to my DeviantArt or YouTube in months

I have so much energy right now but no outlets

I still haven’t tried out my drawing pad i got for my birthday last year

I have so many drawing ideas but my spiral sketchpad is filled up and I have yet to get a new one

Ive many intricit and detailed story ideas that i know im gonna forget if i dont write them down bu due my procrastination i haven’t done so im prolly gonna lose everything

The fact Thurston Waffles hasn’t posted anything since late April as well as the fact that he’s got Kidney problems

So many ideas for videos but I only have WindowsMovieMaker and the HumbleBundle my mom got me idk YEARS ago won’t install

I’m gonna be 17 at the end of September, which i only have until next June before I graduate High school, have to give up my Chromebook, start thinking about college and getting a job, possibly moving out and living on my own, the knowledge that my parents are in their late 50′s and early 60′s so hey might be gone sooner than most parents and I dont know how to function without my parents doing everything for me

These weird tingles ive been getting in my body for he pas couple days

The fact that im not gonna a kid soon and im gonna have to grow and stop doing whatever i want whenever i want and i’m gonna never accomplish my dream of creating a successful cartoon and will probably end up at a dead end job I HATE just to make ends meet and eventually dying alone because I dont wanna be in a relationship or have kids

Everything is too overwhelming. The light, the sound, my thoughts, its all too much. I wanna curl up into a tiny ball and disappear from this awful experience called life

Capitalism

i hate being so passionately when i’m upset, everyone else is calm but i have meltdowns and freaks outs over things i shouldn’t even care about or are miniscule (Comes with being autistic i guess)

I have 0 patience and i hate it

I’m starting to regress back to being a childish brat after all the progress i’ve made

i’m constantly surrounded by either criticism or praise that contradict each other so i dont know what to believe about myself

the fact that i have so many great story ideas but i cant write a cohernt thought with proper grammer or sytax or spelling o save my life, nor the art skill or the patience or the tech to draw comics

i haven seen my therapist in days and i need help but i know im not actually gonna change 

having gender panic

I have no in person friends and ive forgotten how to interact with people

ive become a noodle limbed nerd

Ive gotten super skinny

I want someone o break through my shell and help me change bu I know thats just a fantasy and im the only one who can do that but im too lazy to put effort into it

everything i used to enjoy suddenly feels tedious monotonous repetitive and uninteresting

I feel trapped and scraed 

The fact after being bulied so much the only way i can really assert myself is to get violent and angry because they would want me breakdown and cry

I have this image in my head of who i want to be; And badass that people including adults, are scared of and know not to fuck with me or they’ll get hurt (Basically Jotaro, bu I’ve had this image since before i even knew what jojo was) And the fact I KNOW that i’s a pointless endever and that i only dig my own grave when i get mad but its like ingrained Branded into my my psyche so im always going to larp that vision of myself but not get anywhere and only regress further

I want to address my problems and change but I never do and stay static and regress

I cant take crticisim even though i know its true

The reason im so scared of writing fanfiction is because i know its gonna be a mess despite what i think is a great story and people will end up mocking it and what little self confidence i have will shatter

Star Vs wasted potential

the fact that I dont know where to take the whole “Rubi dies at the  end of he first season but comes back o life except she’s not actually she’s just a walking meat sack containing an anchint eldritch god that will, sooner or later, burst out of her and destroy her body, and she’s fighting for control of her ow body due to Skarlotus trying to devor her soul and Data’s medience is only delaying the inevitable” storyline of my concept cartoon, The Crypto Club

I have an AMAZING idea for an Invader Zim storyline that has fascism, rascism, mass genocide, child soldiers, political intrigue, propaganda, baiscally space hitler and more (okay that came out sound REALLY bad, but NONE of it painted as good!) It also involves Zim and Dib coming together to stop an even bigger threat and there is a really ironic ending that brings my OC GA83′s story full circle

[dt-canim]

Oh boy, this is gonna be a long one haha. This is a bit of an unusual post, but Tumblr, I need some assistance.

Ok so I've always have known about autism and stuff like it but it wasn't until about a year ago that I started looking into neurodivergency more. If you're wondering, it was brought about by my favorite Ducktales episode (season 3 episode 6: Astro Boyd) airing for the first time and I saw people talking about its autistic/neurodivergent themes.

Since then, I’ve been picking up some of my tendencies and it got me wondering. I never remember getting tested for this stuff so this is just based on my experiences and research. So for educational purposes, I'm gonna put some of the traits I do and see if any neurodivergent ppl relate lol

The first thing I want to touch upon is something plenty of us are probably familiar with: stimming. My experiences include;

Excitedly hitting a book I'm reading because of a cool call back, a really funny joke, or simply something badass happening (this just happened to me other day lol)

Flailing my arms and/or legs when something similar (to the point above) happens in a movie or tv show I enjoy

“Vibing” with my best friend includes: waving my arms and head around, bobbing up and down like I am an idle video game character, and/or just generally moving in place for a solid minute or two

The next thing I will mention: Hyperfixations

If you have seen my Tumblr, profile, or simply paid attention to the beginning of this post, you may not be surprised that I hyperfixate with my favorite show, possibly ever, Ducktales. I got emotional last year when I heard it was ending and legitimately cried at the end of the last episode. I mean watching those final credits still makes my heart hurt. (And I know I'm terrible at posting but I will never truly leave the Dt fandom)

Sometimes it happens rather quickly. For instance, I went to the mall with my friend last Saturday and impulsively bought a book called The Extraordinaries. I finished it in 3 days and I swear if I don't go back to that Barnes & Noble and get my hands on the sequel soon I will do crimes.

When I find things to hyperfixate about it is all I want to talk about with people for a while. But then I feel bad when they don't share my interests because I don't just want people to listen to me babble my head off all the time about stuff they don't care about.

Something I found out recently, losing track of time apparently can be a neurodivergent trait.

So yeah I've done this a lot. Overall, I just have terrible time management skills. I'm not great at putting things down on a timeline and it makes me anxious when I do so.

Also, since going into homeschooling about 5 years ago, I constantly lose track of time. Most of the time, I only know what day and time it is because I have a calendar next to my bed and a phone around me at all times. (off-topic but it annoys me that I used the word time so often here)

Prioritizing tasks, knowing how to start things, and just overall getting shiz done..???

I have. So many. Sketches I want to finish. But I keep going to a new one cause woop I just got a new idea must do it now right?! (Seriously though, I'm sorry that I haven't been posting much art lately)

I have a comic I want to start developing but I have no idea how on earth I should do that. And sometimes things seem obvious, like get the outlines for your story, get main plot points down, PUT YOUR DAM IDEAS YOU HAVE IN YOUR HEAD DOWN SOMEWHERE ANYWHERE. But nooo I'll just sit here and keep starting new sketches of my main characters. That'll get you a product you'll be happy with.

Sometimes I will just sit there thinking ok I'm sitting here but I have work I need to get done and I am running out of time to do it and it is stressing me out right now but I can't move I can't do it but I need to because it needs to get done and I am running out of time but it is stressful. Rinse and repeat for at least a half-hour, maybe take a nap lol.

This point is the fact that even though I never got tested I know I have maladaptive daydreaming which has a link to Adhd and neurodivergency in general.

For those who don't know what that is, I will try to explain. Yes, it is daydreaming but it's more than that. (you know what? I'm just gonna put the traits I found off of a site and add my feelings toward it lol)

extremely vivid daydreams with their own characters, settings, plots, and other detailed, story-like features

daydreams triggered by real-life events (mostly media I consume in my case)

difficulty completing everyday tasks (kinda like the stress-sitting I mentioned earlier just with daydreaming mixed in)

difficulty sleeping at night (at the time of making this point is it currently 3 am, though I am aware I'm up rn because of this post, it is usually because of the daydreaming)

an overwhelming desire to continue daydreaming (ok that's just...accurate)

performing repetitive movements while daydreaming (typically I walk around my house like a ping pong ball)

making facial expressions while daydreaming (idk I usually mouth what my character are saying or replicate the face their making)

whispering and talking while daydreaming (^^)

daydreaming for lengthy periods

The last thing I will mention for now is my family cause many sources say that this stuff is commonly genetic soooooooo

My mother has been diagnosed with dyslexia since she was a kid.

We've suspected that my brother has Adhd. To put it in perspective I will paraphrase something that his 2nd-grade teacher once said. “He moves around so much I want to just strap him to a chair sometimes but I am afraid to do it cause I think he'll explode”

I have more I could potentially talk about but I don't want to make this too long. I just want to know if anyone relates to this. So here take this mess of me hahahaaaaaaaa

[lannisterdaddyissues]

The Last Kingdom High School AU - Chapter One

Hey y’all,,, so I finally decided to make this a thing after like 100 years! Anyone remember this post? It’s a thing now!! All my friends in the discord finally convinced me to share my writings with the world so here it is! This is going to be a multi-chapter fic, I will update it during the summer but I have a job so idk if updates will be regular. Anyway here is chapter one aaah!!

Chapter One

TLK High School AU

Word Count: 4.1k

“Oi! Arseling! Get your sorry arse to the principal’s office, now!” Leofric shouted as he slammed the gymnasium’s phone back onto its receiver. Uhtred’s classmates all turned to stare at him with round eyes, like a bunch of identical creepy owls. Uhtred hated those looks. He’d been getting them a lot in the past two years.

“Thank you for coming to see me, Uhtred,” the principal Odda greeted him, smoothing some papers out on his desk as Uhtred shuffled into his office. A steaming hot coffee mug sat to the side, untouched, and a bagel with a single bite mark in it lay on a napkin near the corner of his desk. “I wanted to talk to you about your behavior lately.” Uhtred blinked slowly but said nothing, leaving the ball in Odda’s court. Odda sighed. “You’ve been starting fights a lot lately in the past few months...the most recent one, three days ago, I believe, you sent my son home with a bloody nose and a black eye.”

“He called me names,” Uhtred said tonelessly, “And he’s an arsehole.” Odda grimaced and sucked air through his teeth. “See, Uhtred, that’s just more of what I’m talking about. You cannot just go around speaking like that to adults. You need to respect your elders. Otherwise, you’ll just keep getting in trouble and getting sent to detention. You know these are put on your permanent record.”

“...Fine.” Odda nodded, as though satisfied, and shuffled his papers. The reading glasses perched on the edge of his nose drooped a little and he pushed them back up towards his face.

“I also wanted to talk about your grades this semester.”

“What about them?” Uhtred stated more than inquired, hair falling over his shoulder as he tilted his head to the side. The old man never said anything of interest to him, just that he needed to stay on track if he wanted to be successful in life and that he had to watch his words in his essays. So what. He scanned the rest of the principal’s office nonchalantly, searching for an item to fixate on so he didn’t have to meet Odda’s eyes.

“They were just fine in your freshman year, perfectly average and acceptable for you to graduate, but halfway through your sophomore year they took a turn for the worse. Last year you failed both your English class and your maths class, barely passing your science class with a C-minus.”

“And what about it?” Uhtred repeated, twiddling his thumbs. His eyes alighted upon the globe in the back of the room on top of Odda’s filing cabinet and he exhaled deeply, wondering if he could get it to spin with his breath alone all the way from across the room. It didn’t move and he felt his mood blacken a bit more for no reason whatsoever.

“See here, Uhtred,” Odda said, leaning forward and turning the paper so he could see it, “you’ve got this red letter here. What letter is this?” Uhtred rolled his eyes.

“An F, sir,” he said, turning the honorific into more of a mocking title.

“Yes, I see, and do you know what happens when you fail your core classes, Uhtred?” There was a pointed gleam in Odda’s eye.

“What, sir?”

“It means you fail. You fail the entire year. And when you fail the entire year, do you know what that means, hmm? Let me tell you. You have to retake all of these classes.” Uhtred shot out of his chair, outraged. “I most certainly do not!” he shouted. “I’m not taking these bullshit courses again! I could pass these in my sleep, this is fucked up!”

“Life isn’t always fair, Uhtred,” Odda gave Uhtred another pointed look for his language and Uhtred sat down again, chastised. He sighed. “I know you‘ve had a tough time these past couple years.” Uhtred scoffed and whipped his head to the side.

That was a bit of an understatement, he thought. Uhtred had never known his birth parents. All he had ever known was his adoptive brother Ragnar’s father, who was also named Ragnar. He had grown up alongside Ragnar, Ragnar’s sister Thyra, and Brida, his best friend, and together the four of them were inseparable. Two years ago, Ragnar’s father had died in an accident, leaving Uhtred and his adoptive family to Kjartan, Ragnar’s uncle. Kjartan was neglectful and ignorant; he mostly left them to their own devices since he couldn’t be brought to care enough about them to hurt them. His son Sven was an abusive arseole whenever he visited, though.

“I don’t want your pity. It’s fine.”

“Since I know there are extenuating circumstances involved, I’ll give you an ultimatum,” Odda said. “I’ve asked a boy in your class to tutor you in all four of your core classes. He’s agreed to do it - don’t give me that look - in exchange for community service hours. You don’t have to pay him a dime.” The chair Uhtred was sitting in squeaked as he uncrossed his legs and recrossed them.

“And who am I tutoring with, sir?” Uhtred mocked, thinking his day couldn’t possibly get any worse.

“His name is Alfred Rex, I believe he’s in your class-”

Ohhhhhhhh, fuck that.

“No!” Uhtred yelled, “I am not working with that pain in my arse!” Odda gave him a pointed look over his reading glasses.

“I believe he’s in your class, and you should be grateful that he’s agreed to do this for so little. He’s the brightest student in the school. Surely you won’t be able to fail any of your classes with his help.” Taking a sip of his coffee, Odda leaned back in his chair, looking satisfied. Uhtred was glad one of them was.

“You must have missed the part where I said he was a pain in my arse,” Uhtred seethed, fingers itching to strangle the principal - and maybe a particular student - to death, “We absolutely hate each other! This will be a fucking disaster! He doesn’t want to teach me shit, he just wants to lord over me like he always has!”

“Now I am just disappointed in you. Alfred wants to help, truly he does! And he’s all you’ve got right now, so you’ll just have to suck it up and deal with it, won’t you?”

“How much time do I have to spend with him anyways?” he spat. Odda met his eyes over his reading glasses and pursed his lips.

“You’ll be tutoring with him four days a week. One day for language arts, one day for maths, one day for science, and one day for history. At the end of the week he’ll give you a report of your progress. Really, you should count yourself lucky that he’s taking so much time out of his busy schedule to tutor you.”

I have to spend four days out of every week with him?!

“That’s not going to work, no way, I can’t spend four days out of every week with him. Give me anybody else and I swear to whatever god you worship that I’ll do it. Not him.”

“Uhtred, I already told you,” Odda’s voice grew firm, “You can take it or leave it. You’re not getting tutoring from anyone but Alfred. This is the last straw.”

“Whatever,” Uhtred hissed, “I’m leaving, and I’m not getting any tutoring if it’s from him! Alfred can screw his perfect self as many times as he likes, see where that gets him.”

“Uhtred! Wait!” Odda called after him. Shutting the door to Odda’s office, Uhtred pulled a cigarette out of his backpack and lit it, ignoring the multiple shouts of his name that followed the trail of smoke he left down the hall.

Uhtred slammed the door to his car shut, seething as he aggressively turned the ignition key and cranked the volume on the radio up high. He plugged his phone into the charger cord and hit call on the pre-existing groupchat he had with his best friends, Finan Agil, Sihtric Elflaedsson - his name was actually Kjartanson, but he legally changed it a few years ago when he moved in with his mom - and Osferth Heahengel. “Hey,” Uhtred said as the line clicked and they all greeted him. Gym class with Coach Leofric had just ended, so they were still in the locker room changing their clothes.

“The hell was that all about earlier?” Finan asked on the other side of the line. “You get sent to the office again? What’d he tell you?” The others voiced similar questions.

“You want to know what he told me? I’m fucking failing my classes. I have to get a tutor. I have to see him four times a week. That’s bullshit!” Uhtred ranted. “I’m going to have to repeat a year if I can’t bring my grades up. This is by far the worst fucking shit that has happened to me, ever.” Feeling his temper worsen, Uhtred made a right turn far more violently than he normally did and grunted as the tires squealed.

“What the hell?!” Sihtric yelled on the other end of the line. “You have to get tutoring?! That sucks!” Uhtred nodded his agreement even though they couldn’t see him.

“Do you know who your tutor is?” asked Osferth. “Maybe you won’t actually mind them. I mean if they said yes, they can’t be that bad, can they?” Uhtred gave a mocking laugh.

“Oh, dear Osferth, why don’t you just go on and ask me who it is?” The line went silent for a moment as all the friends considered how bad the news was going to be, and then Osferth spoke again.

“Uh...who is it?”

“Oh, only Alfred fucking Rex, the hugest prick in our grade.” 

“You’re fucking kidding me!” “You have to tutor with Alfred?!” “But you two hate each other’s guts!” They all exclaimed simultaneously.

That fucking bastard, Uhtred thought, I know he’s just doing this to get one over me. He’s always bossing me around and acting like he owns the entire school. I fucking hate pricks like him.

“That’s just the worst,” Sihtric said sympathetically. The sound of a door opening on the other side of the line roused Uhtred from his bitter thoughts. They must have finished changing and were now heading to their next classes.

“I know, but Odda doesn’t even care,” Uhtred spat, “He says this is all I get! I can’t believe his audacity! You and I both know that Alfred wants to boss me around and that’s that!”

“I don’t know, Uhtred, maybe give him a chance,” Finan said doubtfully, “At least you’ve got a tutor, and Alfred’s the smartest kid in the school. You’ve got an advantage here.”

“Well, whatever, I’m home now so I’ll talk to you guys later,” Uhtred said, pulling the phone away from his ear.

“Wait, you went home?!” Osferth exclaimed. 

“Uhtred, you’re going to get caught. That’ll just be another detention for you. Maybe you should come back.” Uhtred turned the key in his car’s ignition and slid it into his pocket, ignoring Finan’s words.

“Right now, I couldn’t care less about detentions,” Uhtred said. “See you guys later.” Finan protested with a “wait, you bastard—!!”, but Sihtric and Osferth bid him goodbye and he hit the end call button with little remorse before shutting his car door and making his way to the front door.

“I’m home,” Uhtred called out as he shut the door behind him. A chorus of ‘hey’s greeted him and Uhtred left his bag on a chair before walking into the living room. Ragnar - Uhtred’s adoptive older brother - and his childhood-friend-turned-girlfriend Brida were cuddling together on the couch. Some movie Uhtred didn’t recognize was paused on the screen. “Uhtred, what are you doing home so early?” Ragnar frowned at him as he sat up and pushed the blanket off his legs. Uhtred exhaled deeply and plopped on the couch like a deadweight, causing Brida to shove him with her foot.

“Didn’t feel like staying at school,” he muttered. “Left after gym class.” Brida sat up at that and she exchanged a glance with Ragnar, looking concerned.

“Hey, well,” Ragnar began, “Speaking of school, I have something I need to talk to you about.” Uhtred frowned.

Gee, how could this day possibly get any worse? I can’t wait.

“The principal called us a couple days ago and told us that...you’re failing this year, Uhtred,” Ragnar said seriously. Brida nodded alongside him.

“He said you’re going to have to repeat a year if you can’t hack it,” she added. “So Ragnar talked to him and the principal arranged for you to get tutoring with—“

“—With Alfred,” Uhtred interrupted, balling his fists, “Yeah, I already fucking heard.” Ragnar’s eyes widened.

“Oh, fuck,” he said.

“Yeah, oh fuck! I can’t believe you! Why didn’t you tell me earlier? I could have said no sooner!” Ragnar shrugged and laid back against the couch, crossing his arms behind his head. “I forgot,” he said honestly, smirking.

“Are you kidding me?! You know how much I hate Alfred! Why are you laughing at this?!”

“I’m not,” he said, “Don’t know what you mean.”

“Ragnar, please, tell me there is another option besides getting tutoring from Alfred of all people,” Uhtred begged.

“Sorry, Uhtred, but there’s no negotiation on this one. You need to get out of this house and away from Kjartan. You can’t do that if you fail your last year of high school. You need to go to college and, well, your principal gave you a stellar opportunity. Besides, you guys have never really spent any time together outside of class. Maybe you could find some common ground and we can finally be free of your constant complaining.” Uhtred dug his nails into his palms.

“How,” he growled, “Could this possibly be a good thing? Stop acting like my dad, Ragnar, you’re only a year older than me. I thought you were on my side about him.”

“Is that what this is about, Uhtred? That you don’t need help?” Ragnar rounded his eyes pleadingly. “Come on, Uhtred, do it for your future. Not because I think you’re going to be some great brilliant fucking Einstein, but you need to get out of here. Don’t be like this. You’re doing it whether you like it or not. I will call Alfred and have him come to our house for tutoring. You can do this on your terms or on ours.” Uhtred growled and reached for his phone, standing up from the couch to head upstairs.

“Give him a chance,” Ragnar said again. “One chance.”

“Fine,” he hissed, “But that doesn’t mean I have to like it. I’m going to hate every fucking minute of this and you’re going to feel extremely guilty whenever you think about it!”

“Where do you think you’re going?! Your first session is at three,” Ragnar called after him. Uhtred just yelled in response and slammed his door shut, the little bells on his door handle jingling.

As he lay on his bed in his room, the door locked, Uhtred took the time to reflect about the day’s events so far.

Alfred Rex...he’s a total fucking prick.

Uhtred had met Alfred in his freshman year of high school. Alfred had gone to a different elementary and middle school than he had, but Winchester High was the only high school in the area. They’d immediately gotten off on the wrong foot and had been bitter enemies ever since. Uhtred thought Alfred was an officious, sickly, annoying pain in his arse and Alfred thought he was a stupid child that needed to be told what to do. Hate at first sight, truly.

Uhtred sighed. His sister Aethelflaed was so much nicer. She was a freshman, so he’d only met her this year, but he had no idea how the two of them were related. Aethelflaed was a social butterfly and tried to include everyone in everything she did, while Alfred was just a complete arseole. Dammit, why was he stuck with him?!

Growling, Uhtred threw his phone at the wall.

3:02 pm. He was past the point of no return. Pushing open the library doors reluctantly, Uhtred poked his head in, scanning the area. A couple of students he recognized were perusing the library’s faculties. Aldhelm Sawyer - an extremely tall brunet who had a bag of wet dicks for a personality - lounged on one of the couches with a science textbook propped on his lap, one leg crossed over the other. A pretty ginger girl whose name he thought was Eadith sat at a table by one of the windows across from a guy with dark hair; Eardwulf was his name, if Uhtred remembered correctly. Aethelflaed, Alfred’s younger sister, was using one of the computers. When he walked in, she turned around and smiled at him and he felt his heart flutter a bit. Something about her had that effect on people. On the other side of the room in the tutoring section, Odda - the principal’s little shit of a son - was giving a freshman tutoring session at one of the whiteboards. Alfred was nowhere in sight so Uhtred headed towards one of the open tables and plopped into a chair, checking his phone.

“You shouldn’t be on your phone if you’re here to learn,” a voice behind him said. Uhtred whipped around, hissing.

“What do you want,” he bit out, before thinking better of it when he recognized the owner of the voice as his tutor, Alfred. Alfred was...how did Uhtred describe him? He was tiny and slender, shorter than Uhtred by about half a foot. The first time they met, Uhtred mistook him for a twelve-year-old, even though they’d both been fourteen. His wispy brown hair fell just below his ears and he had a pair of bright blue eyes that were so intense they always made Uhtred feel uncomfortable, framed by a pair of silver wire lens glasses. In essence, he looked like a nerd, which was another reason why Uhtred hated him. Nerds were annoying.

Uhtred scoffed and pocketed his phone, leering up at Alfred balefully. “Whatever you say, Lord. I’m here for your blessings and guidance, so let’s get this started, shall we?” Alfred sat down and the two of them unpacked their belongings in silence.

“We’re going over English today, as per Odda’s suggestion, so why don’t you show me where you’re at?” Alfred asked, putting his chin in his palm.

“Yeah, go on, teach me stuff...English. I bet you’re fucking great at it.” Uhtred crossed one leg over the other and leaned back in his chair until the front legs were off the ground, hoping to provoke a reaction. He was disappointed; Alfred merely ignored his blatantly disrespectful behavior, instead ducking his head to flip through his English textbook.

“Feel free to disrespect me,” he murmured, “But rest assured that Principal Odda will hear about it, and my reports are extremely thorough. I don’t care what you say to me, but just know that it will reflect badly on you.”

Oh my gods, I fucking hate this guy so much!

“Yes, my Lord, I live only to serve you,” Uhtred snarked, clenching and unclenching his fists under the table. Leaning over, Uhtred pulled his folder out of his backpack and slid a paper out. “We’re reading Of Mice And Men. You might think that’s a bit below your skill set, but here you are.” Alfred snatched the paper from his hand, rolling his eyes.

“Don’t be facetious, Uhtred. Just shut up and let me read this. That’s what I’m here for, as you said.” Never having been one to follow orders, Uhtred opened his mouth to snark again, but Alfred snapped his fingers to grab his attention and glared at him.

“I said shut up. I’m reading,” he repeated, his eyes moving back and forth like the spool of a typewriter. After a couple of minutes, he set the paper flat on the table and bit his lip, looking a bit uncertain of what to do.

“Well, Lord? Does it meet your lofty expectations?” 

“Can you not?” Alfred asked sharply, “And no, I’m sorry to say, it does not. What were you even trying to write? The subject of your analysis seems to jump to and fro. And while you are summarizing the story in your analysis, that’s all you’re doing. Summarizing. You’re not explaining why it’s important or what it means. Here, let me show you mine…”

“‘Bye, nerd,” Uhtred sneered, standing up and slinging his backpack over his shoulder. Alfred stood a bit more slowly, organizing all of his supplies into a neat pile before picking them all up and sliding them into his bookbag. 

“I’ll see you tomorrow, then?” Alfred inquired, not appearing bothered by the epithet apart from his clenched jaw. Good. “Make sure you incorporate what I told you today into your essay. I don’t want you to get a poor grade. And do keep in mind that I am reporting all of this to Principal Odda.”

Sure, whatever, Assfred! Feel free to slit your throat when you get home today! “...Yeah,” Uhtred said, before standing up and leaving without a word of thanks. Aethelflaed waved at him on his way out and he grinned back at her as he opened the doors.

“Welcome home, Uhtred,” Thyra greeted Uhtred as he stomped inside. The smell of spaghetti assaulted his senses and all of a sudden he felt much calmer than he had been a moment ago. “How was your first tutoring session?”

“Yeah, how was it?” Ragnar called from the living room, where he and Brida were cuddling yet again. The same movie as yesterday was paused on the TV and Uhtred had a feeling they hadn’t actually watched any of it and were just using it as an excuse to cuddle. A bowl of popcorn soaked in butter lay on Brida’s lap and the table was littered with empty beer cans, another in Ragnar’s hand.

“It fucking sucked. Alfred is even more of a bastard than I remember. Feel free to regret your decision completely,” Uhtred sniffed. Ragnar grimaced sympathetically.

“Is he seriously that bad?” he asked, snorting. “All I know about him is from your complaining.”

“He’s a fucking midget, but he tries to talk to me like he’s better than me! I fucking hate that, you know I do!” Uhtred threw his hands up. “He treats me like a stupid child and what’s more, he’s telling Odda everything that happens! Like some kind of probation officer! ‘Don’t disrespect me, Uhtred,’ ‘don’t use your phone when you’re supposed to be learning, Uhtred,’ ‘don’t breathe oxygen, Uhtred!’ He’s so annoying!”

“Sounds like a cunt,” Brida said.

“He is!!”

“Well, I’m sorry Uhtred, but if you want to pass your classes, your best bet is tutoring with him. You’re going to have to suck it up. Maybe you two just got off on the wrong foot,” he suggested, playing peacemaker.

“Not true,” Uhtred declared, “He just sucks at being a person.” He kicked Brida’s feet off the table so he could prop his own up and stole a popcorn kernel from her bowl. She flipped him off. “I’m just going to try to pass my classes this year and as soon as I do I’ll be totally done with him forever. Damn, that’ll be a good time.” Ragnar lifted his beer can in a toast.

“To the cunt who’s helping you pass your classes,” he said, and they echoed his toast as he downed his beer can and tossed it on the table.

“Ragnar, throw that empty beer can in the trash right now, you pig!” Thyra shouted from the kitchen. Ragnar shrugged and lazily kicked it onto the floor. “Ragnar!!” Giving Uhtred a ‘what-can-you-do’ expression, he stood up from the couch with a loud, obnoxious groan, plucking the beer can from the floor before lumbering to the kitchen.

“Hey, is dinner ready yet—”

“No! And stop asking, you animal, it’ll be ready when I say it is.”

“Geez, old woman, I was only asking, don’t hit me!”

Uhtred sat back against the couch and lifted the remote, clicking it until the TV changed to an acceptable channel. As the TV faded into background noise, he lifted his head to the ceiling and thought about what had happened that day.

Well, overall today sucked. I’m failing my classes and I’m getting tutored by Alfred, who’s a privileged arseole and also a complete tool. This whole year is going to be absolute bullshit with him around.

One chance, my arse. This year can’t end soon enough.

Art posts: @lauwrite1225‘s sketches of the high school!Coccham squad, @seaberrycloudberry‘s sketches of high school!Uhtred and Alfred, and @seaberrycloudberry‘s sketches of the characters in high school + sketches of Alfred, Aethelflaed, and Edward!!! THANK YOU GUYS SO MUCH. THEY’RE PERFECT. Tagging @bellamehblake, @lonelyislanddaydreamer, @caleb-16charisma-widogast, @ucancallmechlo, @cocchamscrew, @myenglandmylove, @nightskyfangirl, @morganology, @tsukkinami @pokeasleepingsmaug here it is you guys!! I finally posted something!!!

[twinkletoes-rp]

6, 7, 19, 20, 30, 31, 32, 39, 40, 41, 43, 44, 45, 51 (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:・ﾟ✧

Fanfiction Questions meme

6. List your OTP from each fandom you’ve been involved in.

Oh, geez... I’ve been involved in so many fandoms, LOL. I don’t really know if I can/should name them all. I’ll give you the ones (ONLY OTPs - doesn’t mean I don’t ship other things, too) I can think of off the top of my head.

Kiba/Hinata (Naruto), Fakir/Ahiru (Princess Tutu), Stiles/Derek (Teen Wolf), Kirito/Lisbeth (Sword Art Online), Harry/Hermione (Harry Potter), Goku/Bulma (Dragon Ball), Yusuke/Botan (Yu Yu Hakusho), Todoroki/Izuku (BNHA), (better!)Bakugo/Uraraka (BNHA), Toph/Aang (ATLA), and Adrien/Marinette (Miraculous Ladybug)!

7. List your NoTPs from each fandom you’ve been in.

(This isn’t meant to be hate on the ships I name! I just don’t ship them, that’s all! Ship and let ship! ;))

Naruto/Sasuke (Naruto), Kirito/Asuna (Sword Art Online), Ron/Hermione (Harry Potter), Harry/Ginny (Harry Potter), Goku/Chichi (Dragon Ball), Yusuke/Keiko (Yu Yu Hakusho), Bakugo/Izuku (BNHA), and Aang/Katara (ATLA).

19. Is there a ship (in your current fandom) which you wished you could get behind, but you just don’t feel them?

I’m not sure I have a ‘current fandom’ since I live for, like, everything at once, but maybe technically Naruto would be it?

In that case (again, no offense to anyone - and removing the ‘I wish I could get behind’ part ‘cause I do not), NaruSasu. I just...don’t get it? At all? Maybe it’s the ‘what could have been’s or whatever, but when you just take the series at face value, that relationship is...really icky, at least to me, and that’s putting it lightly. It’s so damn unhealthy, especially for poor Naruto. They were never even friends, Sasuke always treated him like shit, and yet...?! *throws hands at half+ of OG series and virtually all of Shippuden* IDK, man. Something’s weird there, and I don’t like it. Can’t support that. Naruto deserves better, damn it. (*casually links her Naruto AU fic where he DOES get better (in more ways than one), TYVM*)

20. Any ships (in your current fandom) which you surprised yourself by liking?

Going with Naruto again, so. Hmm... I guess maybe Kankuro/Tenten? I didn’t even know that was a ship until a friend showed me a really good fic, and I was hooked! lol.

Another might be KakaObi, but only in AUs where Obito survives the cave in and gets out with Kakashi and Rin and recovers, continuing to be the sweetheart he is instead of the ass he turned out to be in canon. Because he, too, deserved better, damn it!

Another is one I might have made up, not sure (mostly in the context of my Naruto AU, NGL), lol: Karin/Shikamaru! It makes sense and there are lots of compelling reasons when you break it down! You know, 'cause Shikamaru would need (or probs at least prefer) someone on his smarts level, and she's a genius, too, just in a different way. And once she mellows out, Karin's really cool, and (in my AU) she grows to eventually adore Naruto (actually fights to defend/protect him in the Pein arc!), and anyone who loves Naruto is good in Shikamaru's book! lol. Plus, she can tell him when he has his genius brain twisted in too many directions, tell him he's being an idiot and help him figure things out in her different way. lol. IDK, I like it!

30. What inspires you to write?

I just...love writing?? I’ve wanted to be an author since I was 8-9 years old, started writing when I was 11, and I’ve been writing ever since! I’m 27 now! I’ve had a few dry spells, ofc, but I always end up coming back! I just feel like writing is in my blood (partly because, I like to joke, my last name is the title of one of Shakespeare’s plays, haha)!

Pretty much anything can inspire me to write, though. I’ll see a pretty flower and be like “OOH, that flower could feature perfectly in this chapter in this way!” and then write 1k about that! lol. Or I could read a review of one of my new chapters and end up thinking of something I’d never considered before and then write almost 3k on that alone (looking at you, middle section of Ch 6 of my Naruto AU, lol)!

Basically, if it sparks joy, I’m gonna write something! X’D

31. What’s the nicest thing someone has ever said about your writing?

Nicest?? Hmm... I mean, I’ve had a lot of things said about my writing... Not sure I can really narrow it down? lol.

I guess the nicest things I’ve ever been told are when I make people cry (espec multiple times!) and actually feel the emotions the characters are feeling, that the characters and their development feel so real that it’s like they’re real people instead of fictional/they’re written so much better than the creator himself wrote them. (Been getting those a lot on my Naruto AU, actually. lol.)

32. Do you listen to music when you write or does music inspire you? If so, which band or genre of music does it for you?

I tend to prefer silence while I write, but sometimes, my house is loud and people keep breaking my concentration (house of 5, lots of animals, not the quietest, lol), I sometimes listen to music. I usually prefer instrumental, and then usually Naruto or Wolf’s Rain (sometimes Princess Tutu, too) instrumental tracks. The Naruto one I like best also has rain sounds mixed in, which is great because I love the sound of rain! Woo! (Here’s a link to that one if anyone else wants in on this! ;))

39. What is your greatest strength as a writer?

Emotions and getting into the nitty-gritty stuff therein. As an extremely visual, emotional writer, I’ve always been able to feel the emotions of the characters pretty much exactly how they’re feeling it in the moment and then put it on paper. I also make people cry a lot with my writing and get them to feel what the characters do, so that’s awesome! It’s always my goal to get my readers to feel things because then I feel like they’ve really connected with the story and characters I’ve written!

40. What do you struggle the most with in your writing?

Transitions are dicks. Sometimes I struggle ‘cause it’s been, like, two seconds or five hours, and I don’t know how to show that, lol. If I can, espec with the last one, I just fade to black. lol.

Also, sometimes I feel like I use the same sentence structure a lot, mostly the ‘..., but...’ format (at least lately). It’s really annoying, and I worry my readers notice and get annoyed/think I suck because of it. lol.

41. List and link to 5 fanfics you are currently reading:

“All the ways I say ‘I love you’” by Leonardo_Charles_BlueWood_21 (Fandom: Ninjago)

“Paradise Lost” by AnchoredTether (Fandom: Voltron Legendary Defender (Zootopia-esque dark AU))

“where my armor ends” by dalniente (Fandom: She-Ra Princesses of Power)

“of cats and curses” by faerialchemist (Fandom: She-Ra Princesses of Power x Fruits Basket crossover)

“Mischief is its Own Reward” by dalniente (Fandom: Megamind)

43. Is there anyone in your fandom who really inspires you?

I don’t really read Naruto fanfic too much anymore, so like...I guess, technically, another main fandom of mine right now is Fruits Basket, so: without a doubt, @kyosohmastan ! They’re my absolute favorite Fruits Basket fanfic author! Everyone’s so in character, the writing is so sweet and feelsy, steamy when it needs to be, and I really love the writing itself - it’s just so well done and beautiful and I die happily when they post a new fic or chapter? Ahhh! Plus, they’re just so nice and talented in so many ways, we have the same opinions on certain things (like Kakeru Manabe is Too Much(TM) for us, haha, no offense to those who like him! lol.), and I just really, really feel blessed to know and read their fics! Love them so! <3

44. What ship do you feel needs more attention?

I’m not sure which ship this is talking about? Hmm... But a ship I definitely think (have always thought) needs more attention is Kirito/Lisbeth from Sword Art Online! It’s so slept on, and that is a damn fucking shame because they’re so healthy and sweet and have so much more amazing potential than they’re given credit for (way freaking more than the actual canon couple, just sayin’, no offense to anyone who likes the pairing)! I have written a good few metas (and a fanfic) on the subject (some/most of which are on my Lisbeth RP blog, actually, lol)! If anyone wants to discuss/RP/anything involving this ship, please let me know! Would love it!

45. What is your all time favourite fanfic?

I’m not sure I have a favorite fic. But one that I always come back to (all of her (mostly G1) My Little Pony fics, actually - first found them when I was, like, 12, and have kept rereading over and over through the years, haha) is A Mother in Her Eyes by LoveLikeElena on FFN. It takes place in the author’s own MLP universe, but I love said universe so much, and her takes on the characters are amazing and so sweet! I love her look at the serious subjects that follow the characters through her ongong MLP series! <3

51. Rant or Gush about one thing you love or hate in the world of fanfiction! Go!

Fanfic readers have become really, really lazy. No one reviews anymore, maybe leave a kudos here and there if you’re lucky (I have a major love-hate (more hate) relationship with kudos...), and it’s so, so, so discouraging to us writers! I wish they knew how it felt, to be honest, espec the ones you know are reading, but just...don’t comment. It’s ridiculously disheartening to work so hard on something for days, weeks, even months or years on something, only to get basically nothing in return. It’s like posting into the void, and it sucks ass. It’s part of what made me quit writing for a good few years, actually, and I’m so sad to see that it’s still a thing. I comment on everything I read because I know how it feels and how much it hurt! It hurts like hell, especially because I remember how it used to be just 6-8 years ago when everyone commented! I desperately pray the fanfic/content consuming world fixes that really soon or we might lose some really amazing writers! Please, even an emoji or keyboard smash! I don’t care, I’ll take anything (and I know I’m not the only one)! <3

[nightwving]

i was tagged by @mollyweasly​ to answer these questions, tysm!! i did most of them the other night but got distracted and am posting them now lmao

1. on a scale of 1-10, how excited are you about life right now? idk, i’ll say maybe a 7 or so? honestly i’m feeling pretty decent for the first time in a while

2. describe yourself in a hashtag? #ohfuck

3. if you could do a love scene with anyone, who would it be? that’s tough... i would never want to actually subject anyone to the horror or doing that with me, but i guess either tom holland or sebastian stan??

4. if your life was a musical, what would the marquee say? “a juxtaposed comedic disaster”

5. what’s one thing people don’t know about you? shit man i usually overshare pretty much everything, but i guess one thing would be that i got hit straight in the head by a golf ball while on a course with my parents when i was in middle school?? it came from way far out but miraculously didn’t seem to crack my skull or give me too bad of a concussion. my dad said it hit so hard that it sounded like it hit the pavement. now i have severe anxiety near golf courses and when things are flying near my head in general lmfao

6. what’s your wake up ritual? i check my phone real quick and then immediately go to pee and brush my teeth. depending on the day and whether or not i’d be late for class back when things were normal, i might shower lol. then either get dressed real quick and go to class or, these days, play video games or get on my computer

7. what’s your go to bed ritual? i’ll usually wrap up whatever i’m doing, make sure my fan is on, lock my door (when i’m at school), strip, take some melatonin, lay down, set my alarm, plug in and then get on my phone for a while until i (hopefully) get sleepy

8. what’s your favorite time of day? i love the evening around sunset or so but i also just love the night in general, especially when things get quiet in the am

9. your go to for having a good laugh? tiktok

10. dream country to visit? ummm... honestly canada 😂 or germany or something

11. what’s the biggest surprise you’ve ever had? last spring i spontaneously won an award in the department that i work for at school because my friends insisted that i get one for all the work i do on the newspaper and for my work study and stuff. they had to work some stuff around because i’m not actually a major and that’s who the awards are for, but they all agreed to give it to me at the ceremony and i was NOT expecting it whatsoever. it was one of the most amazing moments ever especially since i struggle with finding a niche and having faith in myself

12. heels or flats/sneakers? sneakers!!

13. vintage or new? i love vintage but that shit can be hard for me to find

14. who do you want to write your obituary? probably a friend idk i feel like my family would say some dumb corny shit lmao

15. style icon? i have quite a few but slash or duff mckagan from 80s GNR would be a couple ok don’t judge me. and john bender from the breakfast club

16. what are three things you cannot live without? internet, my ps4, and friends

17. what’s one ingredient you put in everything? chili or garlic powder

18. what 3 people living or dead would you want to make dinner for? i don’t even make dinner for myself lmao but if i really had the motivation, probs stan lee, carrie fisher, and my tiny son josh bassett

19. what’s your biggest fear in life? being institutionalized against my will and/or death before i’m ready/feel like i’ve done something worthwhile.

20. window or aisle seat? depends tbh

21. what’s your current tv obsession? i’m not really on a kick with it right now, but i’m slowly making my way through the clone wars in chronological order.

22. favorite app? tiktok

23. secret talent? uhh... i guess a lot of people would assume that i’m not athletic because of my weight but i’m actually naturally pretty sporty and can still be when i really feel like it

24. most adventurous thing you’ve ever done in your life? well i’ve tried to summon spirits in multiple different places, attempted to break into an asylum with my ex, done a pregnancy test with an old friend in a burger king bathroom... idk if those count as “adventurous” but that’s about all i got as of right now in my life

25. how would you define yourself in three words? eclectic, resilient, and real

26. favorite piece of clothing you own? my denim jacket

27. a must have clothing item that everyone should have? also denim jacket lol

28. a superpower you would want? i debate this often... i think shapeshifting would be cool but also telekinesis

29. what’s inspiring you in life right now? movies and stuff i guess

30. best piece of advice you’ve received? probably that it’s okay to do things at your own pace and to not be so hard on yourself when you aren’t doing things the same way as others

31. best advice you’d give your teenage self? wear some better fuckin clothes lmao

32. a book everyone should read? bruh idk i don’t really read anymore, harry potter i guess 😂

33. what would you like to be remembered for? being honest and real but also someone that would’ve been there for you, or to have a good laugh with

34. how do you define beauty? beauty is like something that fills you with wonder and a sense of life or something

35. what do you love most about your body? uh... i have nice legs i guess 😂

36. best way to take a rest/decompress? find something that distracts you and makes you forget about all the shit. get lost in another world in movies/music/etc or just laugh with someone about anything

37. favorite place to view art? i like seeing it in the studios at school when people are still working on it

38. if your life was a song, what would the title be? “somethin’ else”

39. if you could master one instrument, what would it be? ugh i would love to be a full blow pianist but i ain’t got the patience for that. i made it through a few periods of lessons throughout my life and three classes in college but i don’t have the capacity to do more than that. but i would also love to get even better with my voice. i’ve been taking classical lessons for the past couple of years but quit recently because of the anxiety that studio recitals and master classes give me. music major shit is rough

40. if you had a tattoo, where would it be? i have one janky one behind my right ear that i got when i was 16, it’s a bird. but if i wasn’t a fatass bitch, i’d like to get more in different places on my body

41. dolphins or koalas? dolphins

42. what’s your spirit animal? it used to be a coyote according to a quiz years ago lol but it’s probably something different now

43. best gift you’ve ever received? probs my shitty first car that my dad got me last summer. but it’s a hell of a lot better than nothing

44. best gift you’ve given? shit i can’t even remember. i love doing personal little gifts for my friends. ACTUALLY i’d probably say the playlist i made for my friend last christmas because listening to music late at night was our thing

45. what’s your favorite board game? secret hitler is the BOMB

46. what’s your favorite color? yellow

47. least favorite color? probs brown

48. diamond or pearls? diamonds

49. drugstore makeup or designer? drugstore bitch, i’m broke

50. blow-dry or air-dry? air dry preferably but i’ll blow dry if i need to

51. pilates or yoga? neither lmao

52. coffee or tea? coffee unless it’s sweet tea

53. what’s the weirdest word in the english language? all of them

54. dark chocolate or milk chocolate? dark

55. stairs or elevators? elevators bih i got bad knees

56. summer or winter? winter, FUCK the sun

57. you are stuck on an island, you can pick one food to eat forever without getting tired of it, what would you eat? potatoes

58. a dessert you don’t like? a lot of things, i eat like a picky five year old. but i don’t like anything minty

59. a skill you’re working on mastering? singing. but also design-y stuff and videography

60. best thing to happen to you today? i went on a short walk with my mom earlier and there’s always a man across the street from us who sits on his porch every evening and sings with his guitar. i love it

61. worst thing to happen to you today? sitting through my zoom class lmao

62. best compliment you’ve ever received? idk, just when someone has generally called me beautiful? that makes me feel really nice

63. favorite smell? i love the smell of cookies or brownies in the oven. i’m also weird af and love strange things like basement smell and gasoline. also sharpies

64. hugs or kisses? hugs probably

65. if you made a documentary, would it be about? idk probably something about a niche community/town or some cult-y shit

66. last piece of content you consumed that made you cry? avengers: endgame

67. lipstick or lipgloss? i don’t usually wear either very much but probably lipstick

68. sweet or savory? savory

69. girl crush? ana de armas or margot robbie

70. how do you know your in love? i feel like you’d do anything for that person even if it hurt you, and you think about them all the time and want to protect/be there for them

71. a song you can listen to on repeat? i usually avoid listening to things on repeat, but if i had to choose something... idk maybe africa by toto 😂

72. if you could switch lives with someone for a day, who would it be? probs someone like elon musk or bill gates to see what it’s like to be that fucking rich and successful

73. what are you most excited for about this time in your life? just enjoying it and maybe honing some skills with all this extra time. also watching some movies on my watchlist

i’m tagging @verafarmiga, @northuldrra, @tmhnks, @spaceoddly, @breaksfastclub, and anyone else who wants to do it!! but feel free to ignore or just laugh at my answers

[bigskydreaming]

@princeescaluswords tagged me in a fanfic ask meme, and I’m loling at how few of the questions I can actually answer, because I swear I’ve literally forgotten more fandoms than most people will ever have. And I’ve probably written a good couple million words of fanfic all in total....

I know with just my first fandom alone, Roswell, I was in that one writing regularly for about three years and wrote and published probably a million words between the six or so ‘big fics’ I wrote......21 Down topped out at just over 200K, my Paradise Lost trilogy was probably a little longer as I think Genesis and Exodus were both around 80K and Revelations was probably closer to 100K. Riders of the Storm was around 120K.....Passage to Dawn I never actually finished because I scrapped it halfway through and started over.....and my revised version left off at around 50K I think, but the previous version before that had gotten up to 100K......and then I honestly can’t remember the names of my other two big fics at the moment, lmfao, I just know I had one more that was an amnesia trope fic and one that was....oh! Never mind, just remembered. The Long Dark Night of the Soul was one of my shorter ones, probably somewhere between 60-80K.

But yeah, that was just my first fandom alone......but fandom was a little different then, like in the sense that nobody was really writing posts about meta or episode or character analysis......Roswell fandom existed almost entirely on various messageboards and linked sites created by the community. It was years before Ao3 of course, and while ff.net was around, Roswell was one of those fandoms that just never congregated around it......people posting Roswell fics on ff.net were the outliers, the majority of fandom was centered around sites like roswellfanatics.net, crashdown.com and my personal site/board of choice to hang out and post at, polarattraction.com. I’m pretty sure all of those sites have been defunct for years, and I wish I’d done a better job of saving some of my own fics at least, lol. But point is, the fandom was geared just towards the writing and consumption of fanfic more than anything else......so if you were writing something, it was either a fic itself, or a comment on somebody else’s fic, lol. 

Anyway, was just reviewing my various past fandoms, the ones I could remember, and thought of Dark Angel fandom, which I haven’t thought of in forever. Which is kinda funny to me, actually, considering my focus in DA fandom was pretty much exactly my focus in Batfandom - the found family feels.

LOL. Like, I was never one of the better known writers in DA fandom given that my focus was not really the same as most of fandom’s. DA fandom was largely split into two camps locked in eternal ship war - Logan/Max and Alec/Max. I had by this time ‘evolved’ to the point of looking at this and just snobbishly intoning “I do not care for the Straightness of this all and thus I choose to Abstain from the conflict” so there was that at least.....but yeah, thing was, personally, I was in Dark Angel fandom for the found family feels. Max’s eternal search for her siblings she’d been raised with but lost track of when they escaped from Manticore as children.....like that was the good stuff, that was what drew me in and kept me under lock and key until I’d banged out a good couple years’ worth of constant fic writing about her and her siblings before I moved on.

But while Max’s search for her siblings was the catalyst and central plot of the first season of Dark Angel, fandom pretty much only ever took off with the introduction of Alec in the second season, when it became an either/or choice between Alec and Logan. And with most of the second season moving away from Max’s search for her family to focus more on the larger big-picture plots, combined with the fact that most of Max’s siblings never actually made an appearance onscreen.....understandably, they didn’t end up occupying too much of a role in most of fandoms’ fics or interests.

Anyway, like I said, I churned out a shit ton of DA fanfic in a pretty short period of time....my single most popular fic was probably one about transgenics racing to find a cure when they realize they’d been genetically engineered to all ‘expire’ by a certain age, since their creators had no use for genetically engineered super-soldiers past the prime of their lives.

But my personal fave bits of writing, and the series I reeeeeeally regret not saving and wish I could find again, like, there was this one series of one-shots (ranging from a couple thousand words long to some that were about 20-30K long) written about each of Max’s siblings.....all fifteen of them, lol. Jondy’s was the first one I wrote, and one of the first things I wrote in that fandom, and then I just added new stories to that particular series up until Jack’s, the very last one a couple years later....which I THINK was the last thing I ever wrote/posted in that fandom.

And since we only ever met about half of these characters on the show, and most of them only for an episode each, for the most part they were blank slates and the equivalent of writing OCs......and so I’ll always have a soft spot for my time in DA fandom solely because of how many people told me my version of Max’s various siblings was like, the definitive version for them and what they based their own fics or takes on her siblings on. Swoon. Like, that’s my favorite kind of compliment, especially in fanfic writing.

So that series was my Big Thing even if it wasn’t my most popular or well-known fic, and the various stories in it were weird and whimsical and largely experimental. Because part of the point of fic writing for me instead of writing original fic is its like....fanfic is often the place where I just get weird with my writing and try new things even just stylistically. See what works and what doesn’t, etc.

Anyway, kinda curious if there’s anyone out there who was in Dark Angel fandom at all to any degree, or if any of these sound familiar or if anyone remembers reading them.

Like, so Jondy was Max’s sister who we never met in canon but Max talked about often as being her favorite sibling, and her story in this series was called “Little Lightning Girl.” In it she was a stripper slash vigilante, who used her job to take note of predatory guys who then she preemptively scared away from her coworkers or ran totally out of town. I forget how it went exactly, but that one was written as though it was all her stream of consciousness, and she had to my mind a kind of chaotic, whimsical sort of nature, so there was something in there like: 

“Call me little lightning girl, for I’ve lightning in my veins. My hair is always frizzy, my steps all flicker-shimmy-shake. But when I strike, boom, clap, I’m thunder in reverse - by the time you hear the rumble, its already too late. That was you hitting the ground. Don’t hurry getting up. I can wait.”

And then Zane’s story was called “Zen and the Art of Not Breaking Your Customer’s Fucking Face (remember, its bad for business).”

Brin’s was “I Wasn’t Born Yesterday (but yesterday, I remember being very small).”

Zack’s was “Rules For When The Sky Is Falling (and this time it isn’t your fault).”

Syl’s was “The Kind of Girl You Bring Home to Meet Your Parents (when you’ve got the kind of parents that need killing).”

Ben’s was “They keep telling me I’m crazy (I say its the world that’s gone mad).”

Tinga’s was “A Storybook Kind of Princess (with a Grimm kind of happily ever after)” and Krit’s was “The Good Die Young, So Boy, You Better Be Bad.”

Kavi’s was “I Never Learned How To Play Ball (striking out comes naturally).”

Vada’s was “Chase Me To The Desert and Watch Me Live, I Bet I’ll Thrive (you better believe I was born to survive).”

And then Seth’s was “All Her Brothers’ Keeper (you keep your secrets and I’ll keep the watch).”

And though technically not escapees with the rest of them, I am anal and a completionist, so of course I had to write ones for Eva, Jack and Jace too. 

Eva’s was “Big Sisters Know Best (so when I say I’ll die for you, just say thank you and live).” 

Jace’s was “Leopards Never Change Their Spots (but why worry about my 5% leopard when I’m 10% shark). 

And Jack’s was “Shelter The Innocent (but don’t look at the boy without shelter and say that boy, he’s no good).”

Anyway, been randomly thinking about those today now. Well, not randomly since I can follow the train of thought that led me to thinking about them, but you know what I mean. Its just kinda funny to me that I do remember those particular stories so well when there’s entire other fandoms I can barely remember writing in at all. And DA fandom wasn’t even one I was in all that long, ever knew too many other people in, or like....idk. I definitely, definitely have written much more well read and frequently commented upon stories than that fairly random little series of almost-OCs, but for some reason it stuck around in my head a lot longer and a lot more clearly than a ton of other stuff.

[manialwaysfeelsoguilty]

Long reply post

Ooof, I missed a lot of messages and I’m so sorry for answering so so so so late. 

@sonicpsycho : You should ask masakoX to do one his what if DBZ  series on your saiyan siblings AU

He kinda already has one like it with the whole “What if Raditz was good” series that became Dragonball R&R. And the “What if Gine came to Earth with Goku” one feels like it’d have similar beats to my AU (haven’t watched that one yet tbh).

@eirenii  AAA I love your style and how your designs are unique! I hope to see your art more!

Aah, thank you!!!! I feel really bad for not posting for so long tbh :’0

@ Anonymous1: Are you a french speaker, if so in which part of the francophonie do you live?

Yup, I’m French! I’ve been living in France for over a decade now. 

@lisathedork : so I gotta ask cause I can’t find anything from canon and it’s frustrating. How much older than Goku do you think Raditz is? Older than Vegeta maybe?

Well, I dunno about canon, but in my Saiyan Siblings AU, he’s 7 years older than Goku, and thus 2 years older than Vegeta. I wanted him to be old enough to remember his parents and Planet Vegeta and I figured that was a good number. That and seven is kind of an important number in DB.

@ Anonymous2: Big fan of the artwork and liking the Oni Chichi(s), kinda inspired me to think up a fanfic which revolves around a family of Chichis - Chichi (End of Z) is the eldest sister, Chichi (Buu Saga) is the second eldest, Chichi (Saiyan Saga) third and Chichi (Teen) & Chichi (Kid) the youngest and of course the long lost eldest sister they never knew they had Chichi (Future).

sikjzezjc why is this so funny??? Honestly, I would 100% read a story about this.

@ Anonymous3: Any love for Tien? I love your art style 🖤✨ 

Oh yeah, I love Tien! I just never draw him for some reason, ahaha. Kinda don’t draw a lot of characters now that I think about it, oops :’D Def gotta remedy that. And thank you ^ 3 ^

@newbenieroudbottom: been browsing your tumblr 4 so long now, I feel like I should say something, but cant find the words to convey how happy ur art makes me feel so I'll just go ahead w/ the cliche and say YOU'RE AWESOMEEEE

Oh gosh, thank you so muuuch! Messages like this really mean a lot! ; u ;

@cyberbirdperson:I loooove your draws of dbz specially the kidz ones! 😍 are you taking request? You're style is soo cute!😊

Thank yoooou! I’m still on the fence about reopening requests tbh ahaha

@Anonymous4: is this blog still active?

*sweats* i-it is now!

@hoshisakurai-kawaiiartblog: I LOVE YOUR ART SO MUCH! An the Saiyan Siblins AU too... YOU ARE AMAZING! :D

AAAAH! Thank you! You’re so sweet!

@Anonymous5: So in that one post where Raditz and Kakarot are having a conversation in Saiyago(that's just my guess, don't shoot me), what exactly are they saying?

Tbh, I have no idea. Kinda just wrote random gibberish :P

@Anonymous6: Have you ever considered Bulla x Pan? I think it has the potential to be really cute

Oh boy, Anon, I sure have!!! I def need to draw it

@Anonymous7: Do you think that Raditz would have know anything about the Great Ape transformation before landing on earth? If so, would be have been able to save Gohan when they were younger?

Well, Raditz does know about the Great Ape transformation and he even told Gohan about it a little while after they started living him (super casually because he’d never turned and didn’t think it was that big a deal). Kakarot was kinda raised with the idea that something bad would happen if he looked at the full moon but never exactly what, so things do end up happening like in canon. 

@noeggets: Your reverting me back to my dragon ball ways

 @msmileena: Idk if anyone asked this for your sayian siblings AU but... has Goku or Raditz ever go Oozaru on earth by accident?

Kakarot has gone Oozaru thrice, like in canon, but Raditz never has. He kinda avoided the full moon out of habit when Gohan was still alive, and when his lil bro turned and accidentally killed their grandfather, he actually started fearing the Oozaeu state altogether.

@smashndash7777: You art good 

wow fam thx

@Anonymous8: Are you active on social media anymore?

oOF well uh I’m trying to get back on Tumblr right now, and I might start posting on Instagram again whoooo knoooows

[like-twilight]

I’m jus’ gon do this cause why not I stole it from Here.

1: 6 of the songs you listen to most?

According to my last.fm in the last seven days: 1: ATEEZ: Wave 2: ATEEZ: Illusion 3: ATEEZ: Win 4: TxT: Run Away 5: ATEEZ: Precious 6: ATEEZ: Say My Name

Guys. I like Ateez.

2: If you could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?

My sister.

3: Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 23, give me line 17.

Well I ain’t standin’ up so here’s line 17 from page 23 of Vale which is on my computer.

““Well then, Your Highness,” I say and crouch down, trying to get a look of her face”

4: What do you think about most?

Baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad things.

5: What does your latest text message from someone else say?

From a real person that’s not an automated message from a bank or a website it’s from my co-worker from October 26th that says “Ok I’ll do it, print it then I’ll replace it”

6: Do you sleep with or without clothes on?

Well. PJ’s are clothes so.

7: What's your strangest talent?

I don’t think I have any.

8: Girls... (finish the sentence); Boys... (finish the sentence)

Girls not allowed. Boys also not allowed. Leave me alone. (My nb friends can come tho.)

9: Ever had a poem or song written about you?

If I did then the creator didn’t tell me :”D

10: When is the last time you played the air guitar?

I... can’t recall.

11: Do you have any strange phobias?

Frogs.

12: Ever stuck a foreign object up your nose?

Maybe as a baby?

13: What's your religion?

I don’t belieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeve.

14: If you are outside, what are you most likely doing?

I’m not outside. But I’d probably be going to work or the store or the post office.

15: Do you prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?

Behind.

16: Simple but extremely complex. Favorite band?

Ateez!

17: What was the last lie you told?

“I’m okay!” #deep

18: Do you believe in karma?

god no!

19: What does your URL mean?

It’s a quote from Ateez’s Twilight.

20: What is your greatest weakness; your greatest strength?

I’m very depressed. Strength is probably that I’m still alive? Idk

21: Who is your celebrity crush?

Idk. Find a lot of famous people attractive I-? I Don’t have just like The Celebrity Crush. Jeong Yunho’s cute tho.

22: Have you ever gone skinny dipping?

No.

23: How do you vent your anger?

I throw a temper tantrum.

24: Do you have a collection of anything?

Just a mason jar of my tears. Also every Ateez album released so far.

25: Do you prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online?

Neither! Fucking email me, bro.

26: Are you happy with the person you've become?

God no :D

27: What's a sound you hate; sound you love?

Ambulance sirens hate. Fuckin... panflute I love.

28: What's your biggest "what if"?

What if I was a... giraffe.? Or a tardigrade. 

29: Do you believe in ghosts? How about aliens?

I believe in things we can’t perceive scientifically or whatever. Not ghosts per se, like souls of dead people or whatever. Also yes to aliens.

30: Stick your right arm out; what do you touch first? Do the same with your left arm.

Nothin I’m jus sittin on my bed. If I move my arms up and down a bit then my blanket and a bottle of water.

31: Smell the air. What do you smell?

Nothin. Is just my room.

32: What's the worst place you have ever been to?

Uuuh a cemetery?

33: Choose: East Coast or West Coast?

In America? Idk which is less racist in general?

34: Most attractive singer of your opposite gender?

What’s an “opposite” gender? I know you mean male but I refuse to give into the cISSEXIST SCUm. 

35: To you, what is the meaning of life?

I have no idea what that means.

36: Define Art.

the expression or application of human creative skill and imagination, typically in a visual form such as painting or sculpture, producing works to be appreciated primarily for their beauty or emotional power.

37: Do you believe in luck?

Yes. But I’ve never been the lucky one unfortunately.

38: What's the weather like right now?

Uuuh I have to google it. Clear. 8°

39: What time is it?

21:30

40: Do you drive? If so, have you ever crashed?

No. But I probably would.

41: What was the last book you read?

Pfssssshhhh, one that wasn’t written by me? Fucks me, dude. Fault In Our Stars? The Death Cure? I can’t remember, it’s been years.

42: Do you like the smell of gasoline?

Yeah!

43: Do you have any nicknames?

Tia.

44: What was the last film you saw?

Uuuuuuuuhhh... UUUUHHHHHHHHH How to Train Your Dragon 3, it was nice.

45: What's the worst injury you've ever had?

Had a bleeding spine! Kinda miss it tbh.

46: Have you ever caught a butterfly?

I probably haven’t tried, I’ve just tried to get them to land on me.

47: Do you have any obsessions right now?

Uuuh I’m into Ateez these days.

48: What's your sexual orientation?

I’m byesexual.

49: Ever had a rumour spread about you?

Yes.

50: Do you believe in magic?

Again, I do believe things could exist we can’t scientifically explain but idk. Not in the Harry Potter magic way.

51: Do you tend to hold grudges against people who have done you wrong?

No, cause I believe everything is my fault.

52: What is your astrological sign?

Aries.

53: Do you save money or spend it?

I save money TO spend. I think I found a healthy balance.

54: What's the last thing you purchased?

A fukin... bike. That’s like in your room. Not by accident but because it’s meant to be there.

55: Love or lust?

Like.. in what context? Love? Idk.

56: In a relationship?

Love.

57: How many relationships have you had?

None relationships.

58: Can you touch your nose with your tongue?

I can’t.

59: Where were you yesterday?

Like on average? Or 24 hours ago exactly. Cause I was at work for eight hours and then I was just on my bed.

60: Is there anything pink within 10 feet of you?

Yeah, my phone case.

61: Are you wearing socks right now?

Ye.

62: What's your favourite animal?

Cat? Idk.

63: What is your secret weapon to get someone to like you?

:DDDD If I had any then people would like me.

64: Where is your best friend?

???? 

65: Give me your top 5 favourite blogs on Tumblr.

I... I dunno? The ones I follow?

66: What is your heritage?

I don’t know what that means. Like what I’m gonna be remembered by? I whined a lot!

67: What were you doing last night at 12AM?

Cried.

68: What do you think is Satan's last name?

Choi.

69: Be honest. Ever gotten yourself off?

Why would I lie about masturbation. Yeah I did.

70: Are you the kind of friend you would want to have as a friend?

Fuck no.

71: You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late one more time you get fired. What do you do?

Save the dog, fuck off.

72: You are at the doctor’s office and she has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. a) Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? b) What do you do with your remaining days? c) Would you be afraid?

a) I am telling everyone. b) Be paralysed by fear and waste all of it. c) Yes, very much.

73: You can only have one of these things; trust or love.

I feel like that’s stupid. 

74: What's a song that always makes you happy when you hear it?

Illusion by Ateez these days. 

75: What are the last four digits in your cell phone number?

4153

76: In your opinion, what makes a great relationship?

I wouldn’t know, buddy.

77: How can I win your heart?

Just be nice to me and I’ll probably be emotionally attached to you for life, sorry.

78: Can insanity bring on more creativity?

I don’t think insanity is the cause for any creativity. If an insane person is creative then they would be creative with a sound mind too.

79: What is the single best decision you have made in your life so far?

Got into kpop, that was nice.

80: What size shoes do you wear?

42

81: What would you want to be written on your tombstone?

“Balled 2 hard lol”

82: What is your favourite word?

There are too many words.

83: Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word; heart.

Kokoro.

84: What is a saying you say a lot?

I don’t think there is one.

85: What's the last song you listened to?

Treasure by Ateez.

86: Basic question; what's your favourite colour/colours?

Pink and yellow.

87: What is your current desktop picture?

A picture of.. Ateez... sorry.

88: If you could press a button and make anyone in the world instantaneously explode, who would it be?

Donald Trump.

89: What would be a question you'd be afraid to tell the truth on?

Uh, I think I’m p truthful, yeah. Ask me anything.

90: One night you wake up because you heard a noise. You turn on the light to find that you are surrounded by MUMMIES. The mummies aren't really doing anything, they're just standing around your bed. What do you do?

Scream. Maybe scramble on the floor and push past them if I can.

91: You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what's even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What is that power?

Immortality!

92: You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again?

Oh geez. I was on a carousel in Italy once, that was awesome.

93: You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?

The one that gave me depression idk which one it was but can it go away?

94: You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who would it be?

Ehh, I don’t want that. Like... I don’t know those people, they could be Awful in bed or just in general too. Like I need an emotional bond first and they don’t even know me and I only know the persona they show to the public. Plus it could potentially ruin the music for me later on, it’d be weird, no thank you.

95: You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?

UUUUUHHHHH I DUNNO Lyon cause Grenoble doesn’t have an airport. Well, actually my sister isn’t in Grenoble right now. Hm well if I grab my card before I go then I can just find a hotel there until she comes home.

96: Do you have any relatives in jail?

I don’t think so? 

97: Have you ever thrown up in the car?

I had to throw up in a car and then asked the driver to stop the car so I can throw up outside the car.

98: Ever been on a plane?

Yes. Seven times. SEVEN TIMES? Yeah, holy shit.

99: If the whole world were listening to you right now, what would you say?

Someone help me, I am so so so incredibly in need of help, please. Please. Thank you.

[matronaa]

The Habits of My Heart || jjk

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

Word count: 4,015 (holy fucc this is my longest one yet lmao)

Genre: Fluff, Angst ig idk, mention of smut? idk man dont ask me

A/N: This is kind of a vent post ?? I mean some of this is a real scenario and some isnt but like i needed to get some shit off my chest and this helped also this took so long and 4000 WORDS WAT i can normally barely get to 1.5k pls be proud okie bye

You had pushed the past memories into the back of your head, until now. Your years of high school flooded your mind once again when you saw him walk through the door. You knew it was a bad idea when you signed up for the music and band department at your university, but you had gotten rid of the constant anxiety after your first year ended. It was halfway through your second year, and you already regretted letting your best friend, Yoongi, sign you up again.

   Through high school, you had avoided all music or instrumental courses to avoid a classmate of yours. Although you were never really friends, you had known him since middle school. Even though you used to talk, you completely hated him. You watched him turn into a complete fuckboy while going to school together, and despite knowing his ways, you still fell for him. It was something about his comforting and easy going demeanor that had you wrapped around his finger. Although you were almost completely sure you were in love with the boy, you refused to admit it. He could get any girl, and he knew it. He could barely go a month before he was in some girls pants, and there were hardly any girls that denied him. You were surprised he hadn’t gotten anyone pregnant. Though his player tendencies were always apparent, you still cared for him. Of course you didn’t want to, but it wasn’t under your control. He had subconsciously taken over your physical, emotional, and mental being. You slowly became more aware that your crush on him had escalated into something unhealthy. You were positive he knew you liked him, and him being who he was used this to play around with you. He would lead you on to believe he liked you, only to get a girlfriend and basically make out with her right in front of you. He did this numerous times, also sprinkling in times he was mad or ignored you for no reason. This sent you down a spiral depression, but at the end of the day he was always the last thing you thought of at night. You hated how you let him affect you, and you continued to blame yourself every day for the pain you went through. Even after high school, his name rang in your ears every time you saw something that reminded you of him. Jeon Jungkook. The boy who almost ruined music for you. Not necessarily listening to it, but you stopped loving it in the way you once did.

At your high school they offered rock band or singing classes in your music department, for teenagers who wanted to pursue a career or hobby in music. These two classes would collaborate to perform a battle of the bands every year. In your freshman year of high school, you signed up for the singing classes, where you learned how to perform and how to make or produce your own music. You had loved to sing and fell in love with the class. You were always in chorus or choir classes since elementary school, so you were amazed at the opportunity to not only sing whatever songs you want but to also write your own. You remembered when they announced the official battle of the bands' date, your friends basically attacked and forced you to sing for their band. You had agreed, wanting an excuse to hang out with them more, but you later regretted your decision. You soon found out Jeon Jungkook was the drummer for their band. It was so awkward at first, but you soon became friends. You had promised yourself you wouldn’t fall back into the loop you were in the years before, but you couldn’t ignore how much you loved the sound of his laugh, or how beautiful his smile was when directed at you. You found yourself prioritizing his happiness over yours, and you gave your heart what it wanted. Even after the battle of the bands, (which your band won) he continued to work with you when you wrote your own music. He seemed to love influencing the way you made music, often giving you advice on the audio. You sought after his approval, and although you had thought he changed, he returned to his old self. This continued on until you were both juniors. One late night you received a text from Jungkook right before you were going to go to sleep. You almost choked when you read his text.

1:07 am

I really like you, I hope you know that <3.

You didn’t believe him, and he spent almost 2 hours convincing you he did. He asked you out on a date that Friday, which you agreed to. The date was soon canceled to what you found the next day.

   Mother nature had decided to pay a surprise visit, so you quickly rushed to the nearest bathroom to your class. You ran into the bathroom, hand already reaching into your purse to make sure you had a pad when you saw it. Jeon Jungkook, balls deep into your best friend. You gasped and locked eyes with Jungkook, then you looked at your friend.

   “Don’t you ever fucking talk to me again. Either of you.” Was the last sentence you said before running out of the bathroom, down the hall, and into another to call your older sister to pick you up early.

   Your depression was horrible, worse than ever. You sister talked you out of suicide multiple times, and you ended up staying home for a month before your parents signed you up to complete high school online. For the first few weeks you were gone, you continuously got texts from both Jungkook and your ex-best friend. After the second week, she had given up, but Jungkook continued to text and call. He did this until you finally answered and told him to fuck off. After that you never heard from them again. You thought you finally found people you could trust, people to make you happy. You were wrong, and they betrayed you and left like everyone before.

   Although you stayed home often, you did make friends online. You met your best friend Yoongi in one of the live streamed classes you had to watch. When the professor asked a question for us to answer, Yoongi would always answer correctly, but not without a snarky remark. You couldn’t help but privately message him, and you both instantly clicked. You exchanged social media and soon numbers. You were inseparable, and you wouldn’t have it any other way. While getting to know him, you realized you had a lot in common. You both had depression and anxiety, and that influenced your taste in music and writing. When you graduated, you flew the hour flight to his town and finally met. He told you about the university he was going to attend, and about their music program. Although you were against it at first, he convinced you to send in an application. When you received the acceptance letter, you rented an apartment with Yoongi against your parents wishes. Although they were very supportive, they didn’t think moving in with someone you only knew for a year, let alone a boy, was a good idea. As much as they believed this, you knew the friendship you had with Yoongi was strictly platonic.

   Your first year at the university was amazing. You made friends quickly, and you were never very stressed. All of your classes were fairly easy, as you were going for a degree in arts, so you had lots of free time. You and Yoongi often wrote songs together, him accompanying you on the piano or keyboard while you sang vocals. You were finally able to write out your anger for the boy who made school a living hell, and you never felt happier. That is until today.

   You and Yoongi were sitting on the couch in the band room, your head in his lap as you both scrolled through social media. You heard a familiar voice from across the room, but you decided to ignore it as you watched a funny video on Instagram. You heard a laugh filled the room that made your heart drop. His laugh. You sat up and looked around the room, almost immediately locking eyes with him. Jungkook, the one you had successfully avoided until now. He flashed a small smile at you and waved shyly. He was wearing a red hoodie and black ripped jeans. You laid back down on Yoongi, ignoring him, and proceeded to spam your best friends messages.

   “Y/N why are you texting me, you’re right next to me-” He began before you forcefully jammed your elbow in his stomach.

   “Shut up and just text me,” you demanded.

You sat up and started to smack Yoongi, repeatedly saying how this wasn’t a joking matter as he continued to die laughing.

   “Look, I’m hungry and I need an excuse to leave or else I’m going to die. Come with me and I’ll buy you lunch.” You said quietly. Yoongi gave in and stood up, and you followed him out of the band room.

   Of course not before you and Jungkook locked eyes once again. You and Yoongi walked across the campus to the nearby McDonald’s, where you began to regret buying him food because he ordered some of the most expensive meals. How does a McDonald's order come to this much, you thought as you could almost hear your wallet crying out for help. You walked back towards campus while stuffing your face with fries and scrolling through Twitter. You didn’t normally get McDonald's because it was unhealthy, but you allowed yourself to indulge in their warm fries and delicious apple pies every once and awhile. You were about to show Yoongi something funny when he nudged you with your elbow. You looked up and saw Jungkook walking this way.

   Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

   “Hey Y/N! I haven’t seen you in so long!” He said, flashing his signature smile. Your heart dropped hearing his voice say your name once again.

   “Hey Jungkook, how have you been.” You smiled as best as you could, trying not to show how nervous you were.

   “Pretty good, just moved here so I’m still getting used to the place. How have you been?” You hated how he kept eye contact with you, it was one of those things that gave you a bunch of unnecessary butterflies.

“I’ve been good. Oh, and this is my friend Yoongi.” You said introducing him, needing a topic so there wouldn’t be any awkward silence.

“Hey man, nice to meet you.” Jungkook and Yoongi shook hands and you prayed for Jungkook to say-

“So I have to go to my last class for the day, but I’ll see you around,” Jungkook said.

“Alright, see you!” Yes! You were so happy he actually had to be somewhere. You and Yoongi waved goodbye as Jungkook began to walk in the opposite direction. You turned back to start walking to the band room when you nearly collapsed because of the bottled up nerves.

You felt bad after you forced Yoongi to listen to your 2-hour rant on how you never wanted to see Jungkook again and that the universe hated you, but he was your best friend and signed up for this when he signed the lease to your apartment. A few weeks past and your music class began to get less awkward than in the beginning. There was no point to try and ignore Jungkook because he was the type to never get the hint. You could ignore him for weeks and he’d still try and talk to you.

You walk into class one day with Yoongi to see a new assignment on the board. The teacher immediately lost his title of favorite teacher as you read the details. “You have 4 weeks to form a group, write and produce a song, and make it performance ready. Today will mark day one, form a group and plan out the most effective strategy to complete this task.” You started telling yourself in your head that it would be fine, and that Jungkook probably had his own band already with his set of friends. You began forming your group with Yoongi on the keyboard, your friend Jennie on guitar, and your other friend Lisa helping you with vocals. You realized you needed a drummer and you mentally cursed yourself. You walked over to one of your friends, Min Hyuk and asked him if he could join your band. You weren’t very close, but you talked often since you had a lot of classes with him the year before.

“Sorry, I’m already in someone's band. I think Jungkook is free though.” He smiled softly, completely unaware of your predicament.

“It's fine, thank you though.” You walked back to Yoongi after saying your goodbye, silently freaking out.

“Yoongi we’re fucked.”

“No, we aren’t” He chuckled.

“The only drummer left is Jungkook which I am not okay with.” You whispered to him.

“Ask him to be in the band, or I will.” He said sternly.

“Fine.” You whined as you walked across the room to where Jungkook was sitting, his focus down at his phone. “Jungkook.”

“O-oh hey Y/N, you scared me.” He jumped as he noticed your figure standing next to him. You watched him pull his earbuds out of his ear and you realized he didn’t hear you when you called his name.

“Hey, I wanted to ask if you wanted to join my group, we need a drummer.” You asked shyly, still unable to look him in the eye for too long.

“Yeah sure, of course.” He said as he stood up, smiling down at you. You both walked back to the group.

“I found a drummer!” You said, glaring at Yoongi. Lisa and Jennie introduce themselves to Jungkook and you all begin to work on a plan to complete the assignment. You decided that you would meet every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday to work on the song but for now to just think of what to write the song about.

Due to popular demand and the ease, you decided to write a song about heartbreak. You were all sitting in you and Yoongi’s living room floor, sharing past stories that could relate to the topic in hopes of coming up with at least the chorus. You had slightly zoned out after Lisa’s story, as you didn’t want to bring up details from your own memories. Sadly, it was soon your turn to share your experience.

“Yah, Y/n, share your story!” Jennie said excitedly, flashing her adorable grin.

“Um.. well..” God, you hated being put on the spot. It gave you so much anxiety. “I just fell in love with someone I thought cared about me. But obviously, he didn’t.” You ended with a nervous chuckle.

“Give us details~ I want to hear the whole story.” Yoongi dragged on, earning a glare from you. Yoongi obviously already knew the entire story, and basically lived it through your past late night mental breakdowns.

“Well…. I knew him for a while,” You started as you brought your knees up to your chest, wrapping your arms around them. You placed your chin on your arms and stared at the floor in front of you as you continued, “He was a playboy, and knew very well he could get any girl. I promised myself I wouldn’t fall for him of course, but I did. And he knew that.” You glanced up at Jungkook and immediately began to drown in his soft brown eyes. However, this time you saw something different in them. A hint of sadness, regret even. Although you didn’t mean for him to know you were talking about him, of course he could tell. “I wouldn’t say he used that against me, but I felt used almost constantly. But I looked past that because we were young and stupid, and I knew he was a good person. In the end, he lied to me and pretended to like me, just to fuck my best friend.”

You watched Jungkook slightly cringe at the last sentence. You almost let yourself feel bad for being so harsh and blunt, but it was his own fault. He’s the one who made the mistakes, the only mistake you made was falling for him.

“That's fucked up…” Lisa said, her eyes filled with sympathy. Almost immediately brightened right back up as she turned to the only person who hadn’t told a story. “What about you Jungkook? Have you ever had your heart broken?” It was obvious she had a crush on him, but she hadn’t admitted it yet and you decided not to ask.

“Hah, usually I’m the heartbreaker,” He winked, “No, seriously though? I have.”

You looked at him, both confusion and surprise plastered across your face. Since when did Jeon Jungkook have a heart? 

“Like in Y/n’s experience, we knew each other for a while, and I fell in love almost instantly. In fact, I don’t remember a time that I didn’t love her.” Jungkook let out a sad chuckle as he leaned back against the bottom of the couch, his hands falling into his lap. You glanced away, but almost immediately felt his eyes burning a hole into you. You were always sensitive to his gaze, and prolonged eye contact with him tended to make you lightheaded. “But I made a bunch of mistakes, and although we were friends I turned her against me. I used to do that a lot.”

“Do what a lot?” Yoongi asked, his head tilting in curiosity.

“Turn my friends against me. I ended up losing all my friends in high school by the end of senior year. I was a horrible and selfish person back then. Luckily, I was able to apologize to almost everyone I hurt. Except for her.”

You turned to look at him again, and the hint of regret that you saw before turned into a sad, apologetic haze. He seemed to zone out as he was flooded with memories he had pushed to the back of his mind.

“W-what would you say to her if you could apologize.” Your voice seemed to falter, but no one else seemed to notice. Something told you he was talking about you, but there was no way. He couldn’t have actually loved you.

He stared deep into your eyes, into your soul. A glare you only remembered seeing in the most intimate and serious times you had with Jungkook, and you gave into his eyes as his voice gave you shivers down your spine as it went down an entire octave.

“I’d tell her I still loved her, and even if she never forgave me or if she didn’t care about me anymore, I’d still love her.”

_____________

   “Okay, we’ll meet again on Monday, have a good night!” You said as you saw everyone out. You had finally finished the chorus for the song and decided to call it a night. You watched Lisa and Jennie walk out before you turned back to Jungkook gathering his things into his backpack.

   “Hey, Kook, can I talk to you?” You asked quietly and he nodded in response. You brought him back to the kitchen and leaned against the counter. He seemed to copy you and leaned against the dishwasher across from you.

   “What’s up?” He said, nervously.

   “Uhm… Who were you talking about? Like we went to the same high school, so I was just wondering.” You wondered out loud. Jungkook's eyes flickered around the room, and he was obviously ansty. He sighed before answering.

   “I think you know who I was talking about.” He said in a low voice, similar to earlier. He slowly walked over to stand right in front of you, and you were only inches apart.

   “Oh really?” You said, raising an eyebrow. You felt yourself giving into him once again. No, no, no, no. Y/n, shut up you flirty bastard this is not the time. “Who?” Jungkook leaned in closer, pinning you with his body gripping the counter on each side of you. You could feel his breath fan over you, his eyes piercing through every defense you had against him.

   “You.” He said before you felt his lips against yours. God knows how hard you tried to bring yourself to stop, but his lips were too soft and you were too weak. You felt his hands against your hips and you instinctively brought your hands up to tangle your fingers in his hair. His tongue grazed your bottom lip and you instantly granted him entrance. He gripped your hips once again as he lifted you to sit on the counter before settling himself comfortably in between your legs. You moaned into his mouth as his hands traveled up under your shirt, only to return down to your hips the back again. He seemed to know every way to please you, which only made it easier to get his way with you. His lips drifted from yours down to your jawline, causing you to gasp softly as he sucked against your skin, raising bruises to the surface. He continued down to your collarbone.

   Suddenly he stopped, his hands comfortably wrapping around you, pressing your body against his. He rested his forehead on your shoulder and lost himself in your scent. God, he missed you, but he never allowed himself to truly show to what extent. Your hands left his hair and fell over his shoulders. You leaned your head against his and relaxed into the hug, taking advantage of his closeness.

   “I love you…” He whispered, in a way that he didn’t really expect you to hear him.

   “I love you too…” You sighed, causing him to pull away.

   “Wait really?” He asked, surprised by your response.

   “Yes, you dumbfuck now keep hugging me.” You said as you grabbed at the air between you, signaling that you wanted him to come back to you. He leaned back into your arms before wrapping his hands under your thighs, picking you up.

   “Which one is your room?” He asked as you leaned your head on his shoulder.

   “First one on the right.” You yawned, the feeling of tiredness overcoming your senses. You closed your eyes and heard Jungkook open your bedroom door. He turned on the light before setting you down on your bed.

   “You’re such a baby when you’re sleepy.” He chuckled as you slowly crawled under your sheets.

   “Shut up and come cuddle.” You smiled, your eyes still closed as you finally settled under your blanket and waited for Jungkook to join you. When he did, you noticed he wasn’t wearing the hoodie he once was. You scooted closer to him and felt him wrap his arms around you once again. Your nose pressed into the crook of his neck, inhaling his scent. You noticed he smelled different from in high school. It was more of a warm, comforting smell than his old cool and confident scent. You had fully given in to all that was Jungkook, and although everything in your being told you you shouldn’t be here with him, you were. And you loved every minute of it.

   You loved every minute of Jungkook nervously trying to ask you to be his girlfriend. You loved every minute of his ‘weekly movie nights’ that included you both falling asleep on the couch, tangled up together. You loved every minute of him showing up without warning in the middle of the night, claiming he couldn’t fall asleep without you next to him. You loved his smile and the laugh you could bring out of him from your shared sense of humor, You loved the full year he waited before asking to have sex. And you loved every minute of the feeling of his hands roaming over you as you finally connected in a way you only dreamed of. You were truly in love with the man who slept next to you, and you wouldn’t have it any other way.

A/n: If you have any requests please feel free to suggest them, im slowly running out of ideas and i need some lmaoo

[angel-nero]

11 questions...

I was tagged by @pureren @zaevran @glaspaladin @z-ayauitl and @kcgane ty so much !!! ♥

RULES: 1. Always post the rules 2. Answer the questions given by the person who tagged you 3. Write 11 questions of your own 4. Tag 11 people

my questions…

1. what’s the worst piece of clothing you own?

2. what’s the coolest piece of uh fashion that is so cool you can’t even wear to go out? lol

3.- what book have you read that you feel it has been the worst?

4.- What’s the healthiest meal you actually like?

5.- do you love keith kogane? (or vld keith lmfao what u prefer to use)

6.- something paranormal ever happened to you? if yea, what?

7.- do you get jealous easily? with who? (friends, popular ppl, talented ppl, the s/m)

8.- what’s the cutest thing you own?

9.- what are your favorite crisps?

10.- do you have a favourite drink?

11.- can you tell im hungry? what hobby you wish you liked or wish you did?

i tag: @kukinta​ @kittyr0se​ @heirith​ @liesfromsatansbuttcheeks​ @sheith-love-always​ @acequeenm​ @blessedkeith​ @lukaspatel​ @ke1th​ @ace-pidge​ @keith8​ but only if you want to!

TESSA’SS AND!! TAMI’S QUESTIONS1!!!

1.  Do you connect with people easily?

mmm, I don’t becos im a very quiet person and can be w u w/o talking at all and I get overwhelmed by convos I don’t care about also it’s kinda hard to win my trust and also interest lol. I’m nice tho, i mite not be enjoying myself but i’ll forev b nice w u.  

2. Did something good happen to you this week?

uH yeah, i’m doing things to improve my health, i did my uni exam, im frEE, i finally don’t have to go to rEliGIoUs classes aNYMORE and UH,,, i got a diet to win weight and its cool i get to eat ESQUITE LMFAO. i will see my bffs in friday and i have browney mix there i should bake but im lazy

3. What’s the personality trait that annoys you most in other people?

When people pretend to like something just 2 b friends w someone or ME, do you know we can be total dif and maybe still b friends if u cOOL. Ass kissers, hypocrisy, LIES LOL. I don’t like fake ppl at all.

4. If you could participate in any existing tv reality show, which one would you choose?

The ones where they change ur style and buy clothes for u 2 love urself and do ur hair and make up and buy u xpensive undies. I loved that crap when i was in secondary school lmao

5. What’s something you’re insecure about?

That I can’t be in one place without wanting tofuckin run, the fact that i can’t eat w ppl at all, that i have to go to the fucken gYM

6. What’s your favourite way to hang out with friends?

:’)) well,,, i go to my bff’s house or they come. If im fine then walk around my neighborhood cus it’s nice ahaha anxiety am i rite. oKAY, even if i get anxiety i like ice skating, or roller skating, i have a lot of fun. My friend want us to go to this pixies concert and im like :(( boo i love u

7. What’s your favourite fic trope?

lol idk,,,,, pining? mutual pining? no pining and they getting to know therngs im melttin sTOP idk…… it depends on whAT shIP. I just know i’ll read any fake dating of my otp. idk idk duuuude i legit don kno. It’s not a trope but i love crunchy feelings, showefjsid fksjnj its hard to talk about this im sOrry

8. What’s the most embarrassing thing you’ve liked in the past?

hahahahahaha my crush

9. What do you consider to be the best period of your life?

When I was 14. I went to parties more than i go to them now lol, i drank and smokkd w who where my best friends back theN i know it’s whack. we used to go to roller skate? all the damn time and did sleepovers and everything was funny, we practically lived together and my friend that was 16 drove us to places lmao,, everything was so good. but like, dont imagine me too wild i only smokd like 5 cigs in my life and hookah and we even broke one.

10. What do you consider to be the worst period of your life?

mpghgg, when i turned 15,,, in the middle of it everythin went to shit to the actual date. But im trying to change that

11. How did you meet your best friend?

I met her,,,, 11 years ago. Look, I usually have best friends in pack. I have 3 bffs at the moment, one of them sat next to me in 2nd year of primary school. IDK how i got to actually know my absolute bff tho but we did a lot of weird shit. we also met in the same classroom and she was my bff back then. The third one was also a frind but not so much during those years. Later i changed of classrooms and shit and bonded more when I was 14 w 6 friends and those r i did crazy shit w but we got separated and stopped talkin and they invited me to the club a week before my uni exam but i was high on meds and sick af. and never replied also going to meet em again at the club makes me nervous af tbH…. I have had a lot of super close friends in my life wTf. In my new school i have also 7 friends that r super close.And we’re also a pack of bffs. I actually had a hard time to use the word bestfriend lol, not bc of me havin a lot or anythin, i was just emo i guess

BEX’S QUESTIONS YOo

1. What’s the strangest nickname you’ve ever been given?

:))))))))))))))))))))))))) gabhole, gabaloney, TETI THAT SOUNDS LIKE TITTY. now ft Aztec secret 

2. Do you like to gossip?

UMMMMMM,, i dont like to listen to another ppl judging someone, I hate it and i normally tell them to stop. it depends i guess

3. Are you afraid of the dark? um,,, no but i dont like it lol

4.Have you ever been stung by a bee?

no, but i steppeddd on one. I also was pickin a tree and till this day i dont knoW wTF it was but i had something big in my middle finger and it fucken hurt like a bitch and i had A BALL on it UGHHHHH I HATE BUGS

Bigfoot or mothman? fucking none

Do you trust anyone with your life? i mean, idk

Do you have any habits you wish you could break? yEAH, to stop tweeting my mental breakdowns is one lmao. 

Would you go ghost/alien hunting? 

both tbh, who wants to break into abandoned houses w me, i live in front of one,,, i mean not so infront but in the row of houses infront of me lmao english whO? dude rosetta stoned by tool is my aesthetic, alien stuff. bex listen to it pls

Best pickup line? (you’ve heard or used on you/you’ve used)

u r the best chair *proceeds to sit on em* keith to shiro probably

Mint or fruit gum?

I dont like gum much cos it makes me hungry or thirsty. I also drink too much soda to fuck w mint stuff :(( say that to the mints i bought lol :( i only eat halls or gum bc im nerves w ppl so they stopped bein a thing i enjoy for me lol. i do that since im like,,, uh,,, idK 15. it fuckd my stomach

What do you want to be remembered for?

I mean if I have to pick and b unrealistic, for art maybe,,, or for the thing i end up working with, like architecture or somethin. Art, def art cus i like art so much

ZURI’S QUESTIONS!!!

1.-if you had to chose one thing to eat for the rest of your life what would it be? 

I MEAN THIS QUESTION IS THE DEVIL I GET TIRED OF EVERYTHING TO THE POINT I DONT WNAN EAT ANYTHING I WILL JUST IGNORE IT SSAYS ONE AND SAY MEXICAN FOOD

2.- what are you most afraid of? Mental illnes and being ill and living 

3.- do you have a favorite place to visit?

I mean,,,, i love walking in the center? centre? of my city bc is like going to another place. Is also fucking Cuba in there. Everyone says that, my dad asked a cuban marine he met if it was true and he said it was ‘’ the fackin same’’ So its like,,, travelling in time and places. also the beach and the port.

4.- what type of weather you enjoy the most?

I need the sun, otherwise i get sad… i like cloudy w sun. I just like to go out in the afternoon tho lol so like,,, sun pls so the sky can turn pinkish

5.- do you have a rare ability like dislocating your thumb or moving your eyes really fast?

i move my tongue real real fast and also can do the cherry knot thing and uh i can like, be aberrantly stupid too. hey but dont fuk w me and bother me 4 bein stupid, i will fist fite u and i mite b stupid but i will also mite think u r stupid if i don like u so fuk off. Dam,,, i get like, bothered so easy LOL like, think u r better than me and i’ll fist fite u LMFAO WHY THO I SUK, but like, if not bothered, i think of everyone as my equal… wow this was not the question

6.- do you think it would be easier to create one universal lenguage or an accurate translator? nO… dont delete culture like that,,, an accurate translator mite come in handy u kno but like, some languages have words that don’t exist in others so like :-/

7.- is there something that soothes you no matter what? um no i wish

8.- favorite piece of clothing? boots and thights

9.- is there a song stuck in your head right now? YEAH dig down by muse i love it, every1 says it sUCLks but i can’t stop listenin to it

10.- why is your favorite animal your favorite animal? i don play favs but i love the honey badger bc of this pleas fuckin watch it and THIS

11.- morning person or late riser? Oh,, i cant wake up to save my life so late riser

SUNNY’S QUESTIONS!!!

1. do you have any plushies? a LOT but im like,,, they r in my wardrobe and i luv em but like,,, they’re all gifts,,, did u kno one of my past bffs bought me a dino for christmas?

2. have you ever walked out the cinema before? 

Yeah, i love drive’s aesthetic and Ryan gosling a lot but is SO boring so idk if my friends and I got kicked out or we prefered to get out to talk haha. 

3. if you could have a mascot what would it be and why?

A CHINCHILLA, they’re a irl pokemon and they r so cUTE

4. what would your theme song be? kool thing, sonic youth maybe or is she weird by pixies. All Over the world by pixies too lol

5. do you have any phrases or sayings you find yourself coming back to often? not really, im so bad at remembering sayings and quotes

6what’s the nearest object to your right? a book called azul by ruben dario

7. would you rather live in the big city or out in the middle of nature? 

Big city forever. I love high? buildings a lot. I dont do that well in the rural life lmao 

8. are you working on any creative projects right now (fic/art/music/photography/ect) Nope at all and das sad cus i should b doing art lmao

9. what’s your favourite movie score? idk what is score… but the soundtrack of trainspotting is one of my favs… oh but score… aghgsdhaj any tarantino movie tbh or wes anderson movie… or before I disappear or demolition oR southpaw or the girl w the dragon tattoo

10. i say vol you say….? uuhhhhh,,,,,  vol….tron??? (ICONIC, I MELT, I LVOE HIM)

[the-cryptographer]

My tiny yugioh shrine - before and after pics. The Jounouchi figure still up top, holding a chain and ready to shank you with a scapegoat~ But I thought I’d zoom in so we could see my BEAUTIFUL NEW ISHTAR SIBS CLEARFILE INSTEAD~

I thought my shrine was getting a little too shippy. And especially a little too shippy in the absence of Mai. WHERE IS ALL THE KUJAKU MAI MERCHANDISE?! i need it pls, thx. But, anyhow~ I bought the Ishtar clearfile off of auction. And I thought it might be an old one, but on the back is actually a logo for the 20th anniversary of ygo, last year in 2016. And they weren’t even really in the movie, so now I’m wondering maybe there is also the chance of some recent Mai merchandise out there, hmm, so she will properly be represented in my collection >3>

But yeah, this is just by the exit to my room so i can stop by before i leave for the day and, offer coins or pieces of fruit or whatever and pray at my card game based alter, and maybe then Jounouchi’s good luck will rub off on me a little~

...

And there’s also a gore version of the shrine, but I usually keep that picture in the back so visitors don’t think i’m a creep. i guess i’ll put this picture in the front if i ever decide to host ritualistic demon summonings in my room or smthn~

(Both prints are from toxicosis by the way.)

Doujinshi are in another location. And I was only going to talk about my stupid ygo bookshelf shrine thing today, but then my doujin shipment came in and I decided FUCK IT i will brag about my crippling lack of impulse control cool swag all at once if i want to... Under the cut-

@battymarionette

If you remember this one~

tdah~ Basically it seems like a Kaiba Corp has put out a game, some kind of ridiculous fantasy RPG where Atem is some kind of Ron the Death Eater villain and Jou may or may not be the princess or smthn. And Mokuba invites Jounouchi over to play it or playtest it or something of that nature. Which seems like as good a premise as any for this kind of thing. And it’s got all the cute platonic Joukuba vibes which is a plus~

But yeah, Jounouchi goes over to Mokuba’s place, has some kind of fight with Seto, and some kind of conversation with Atem, and Mokuba’s kind of confused or upset about something, and then Jou gets all cute and announces that he and Kaiba are dating~ which i’m pretty sure Seto didn’t want Mokuba knowing about or whatever~

But, see, now I’m making this doujin sound sweet when, to be really blunt, i didn’t like it. At some point Seto slaps Jounouchi across the face for something.

I guess I shouldn’t pass judgement when I can’t even read the moon runes that explain why this has happened, but- no. (I’m trying to articulate. It’s not that I think Jou and Seto are incapable of being violent with one another (jfc how hypocritical would it be of me) but there’s something about the whys and the hows~? in my mind, Seto doesn’t gets hands on with that kind of thing unless it’s landing a measured martial arts blow in self defense, or lashing out from a place of extreme vulnerability - the kind that involves him being five seconds away from curling up in a ball of self-protection. So... Seto being collected and composed and instigating violence on Jounouchi’s triggers all my ‘no’ responses. And I also doubt Jounouchi would take that kind of thing without complaint, unless he was actually raving or spiraling and it was, like, a calm-the-fuck-down slap. I think he would definitely retaliate with shouting and intimidation, if not a physical blow. With Jounouchi it’s a little harder for me to define what would prompt physical violence, partly because i think his idea of what violence is is narrower than mine, and doesn’t include things like grabbing somebody’s jacket collar and shaking them around. But, hmm, I think by the time he’s through canon he doesn’t exactly break out the fistcuffs lightly.)

The point was that this doujin made it to the top of my shit list very fast. And I was concerned because, see, I had been avoiding buying KaiJou (in that order) doujins because most of them kind of do this thing to me and completely miss the glass cannon type of volatile fragility I see as being kind of central to Kaiba’s character. But then I caved and ordered a whole bunch. But, actually, I was pleasantly surprised by the other couple of ones I bought, so maybe the curse has finally lifted~ I liked this one in particular-

But, tbh, it also knew the way into my heart~

The way into my heart is Wheeler siblings :x

@rainstormcolors

First of all, I got POLARIS and it was good!

I don’t know what to share about it other than that because it was mostly porn. But I felt like it was kind of sweet and sentimental and Kaiba and Atem going on silly dates at the beginning with gorgeous background details. Also they sit on the throne together at the end and look very in love teehee~

But, yes, thank you for reccing~ I enjoyed a lot~!

BUT- !!! More importantly this finally came in the mail!

To answer your question, it’s a normal rivalshipping anthology. 112 pages, comics and fic~ Exciting things happen like Yuugi and Kaiba playing twister~

And in another story they’re out travelling and having punishment games of some sort and Yuugi gets a beard painted on his face~

AND HIS MOM OMG!! I love when odd characters cameo in my doujins. I think you can tell~

But, no, I lied- I addition to the anthology I got all this other stuff too~

I don’t know. There’s a set of tiny playing cards you have to disentangle. Some have exciting images.

Notably Jounouchi and Atem are the jokers, heh~

I still haven’t checked out the CD. This is a very rushed post where I don’t attempt to read things carefully or any of that~ But it comes with a manual with a bunch of character avatars - lots of expressions for Yuugi and Kaiba, as well as one avatar each for Jou, Anzu, baby Seto, Kisara, and BEWD. So I think it may be a visual novel of sorts. Undetermined~

So now you’ll know what you’re getting if you decide to order, in theory at least. I’m not sure because I bought this off the author’s BOOTH, so idk if the extra merchandise is limited in any manner or if toranoana only sends part of it(?)

ugh, let’s see.

I also got another anthology- a Yuugi-centric one.

It’s mostly rivalshipping, which I’d expect. rivalshipping is really popular in the jp fandom. but, tbh, i enjoyed the more odd ships more-

Like Juudai/Manjoume/Yuugi... Kaiba walks in on the Kohais basically crushing yuugi with love after this it’s so cute~

And Otogi/Yuugi. Ah~ I love the DDM chapters in the manga and how softly Otogi warms up to Yuugi~

A Duel Monsters themed art book I spent too much on~ I’m ashamed to say I don’t recognise a whole lot of the cards

but you’ll recognise Yubel, perhaps~

or the lady that Y!Bakura crossdresses as ;)

and there were quite a few dark magician girls and blue eyeses.

from another illustration book~

and i found a couple of apprenticeshipping doujins on BOOTH, but none of them wow-ed me really~

although I’ve been thinking a lot recently about how Mana inherited the Ring in manga canon. I feel like there are things to consider here. This picture struck me as a result.

Alright~ And now for my favourites~

OMG! A WHOLE DOUJIN ABOUT MALIK AND HIS SIBLINGS!!! I think this one was a predictable fave. I loved it so, sooo much. I was absolutely filled with quality Malik and Rishid moments.

EVERYONE IS SO CUTE!!

Malik and Rishid go biking and run into Mai which is very !!!

There are vacation photographs~

It looks like Malik tries to feed Ra a revival slime and gets eaten himself. I don’t know. But it was good. I’m so happy~ Ishtar family doujins. My life is complete. not really. i can’t die until i finish my fics.

Okay, but my other fave I didn’t see coming at all.

I don’t ship this! I shouted into the void. But nobody really believed her, not even herself. It’s too late for me. I’m just multiship trash. I will ship anything you put in front of me...

Okay, but the real reason I decided to get this was because of this preview panel. Of course I knew it was puzzlleship. But actually I love Mana and vaseshipping for reals. And this was so cute and the art was so pretty I thought- We might as well check the rest of it out~ (the idea of top!Yuugi didn’t hurt either...)

And then jackels happened~ And this kind of ethereal magic stuff~

There was some confusion I think with the cultural imagery in the doujin. Some of it looked vaguely Indic to my untrained eye but- I don’t know what to say, the art was so gorgeous and detailed.

And the smut was all facials and frot so obviously the doujin artist has my gd number, smh.

And Jou appeared near the end, looking amazing, and Jou is automatically about +50 points for any doujin.

I don’t know what to say. Very nice. Would recommend.

Also- just fyi- I do buy doujins for things that aren’t ygo. pls forgive my focus on my ygo obsession tho.

I’m really glad I stumbled across this in the hetalia tag~

And there’s a picture of Tifa being so bad at games at the golden saucer that Nanaki, who doesn’t even have opposable thumbs, can defeat her in PvP. Beautiful~

[rowan-buzzard-whitethorn]

Guess who’s finally on their computer instead of shitty mobile??

Now I can FINALLY answer all these tags!! BTW, I freaking love being tagged in things you guys, and being sent asks, and messages and I JUST LOVE YOU ALL OKAY?

ALSO, because I’ve been tagged in multiple of those question things I will just answer them all in one go. And because I’m pretty sure most people don’t want to see a post a mile long where I drone on and on about my little life, I will put it under the cut.

LET’S DO THIS.

FYI, I guess I won’t tag people because I feel like I am WAAAYYY too late on this train and that everyone’s already been tagged multiple times and are probably “done” with this tag meme lol

Firstly, I was tagged by @court-of-wildfire AKA the most adorable little sunflower that’s ever existed.

1. What ancient God / Goddess is your favorite, and why?

You know, I don’t remember enough to pick. Which really, I should. In my ancient African history course we talked at length about Egyptian gods, and then in pt 1 of my world history course we talked about Egyptian and Roman gods. If I think real hard on it I remember being the most interested in the ones that rule/ had association with the underworld. Like, Osiris, Anubis, Hades, etc. Huh.  

2. What are five things (tv shows, candy, shoes, etc,) that was popular in your youth that you wish you can bring back today?

Lol I was just talking to my sister about how we wish Goucho pants didn’t go out of style. I wish kids shows were as good today as they were back then. Angry Beavers, Hey, Arnold, AHH Real Monsters. Sigh.

3. Name your top five meme’s.

I don’t really hold onto them long lol I’ll just throw some out there: The willy wonka one, The Boromir one, The little girl unimpressed with going to disney one, back when Leo never won an oscar, etc

4. If you could choose your own 7 wonders of the world what would they be?

Hmmm... I don’t know I think the one’s we’ve got are alright. lol oh god im lame

5. If you could have a mythical animal as a pet what would it be?

I’m sorry, who doesn’t want a pegasus??

6. Pick three artist / bands to compose a score for the story of your life.

M83, Thomas Newman, Flo + the machine

7. If you could only keep two of your five senses which ones would you pick?

sight and touch

8. What is your irrational fear?

Is it irrational? I am terrified of going off a bridge and into water in a car. Like I brace myself for it every time I cross a bridge and I have a tool to break the window in my door lol

9. What rule did you have to follow as a kid that you didn’t agree with?  

My mom was QUEEN of saying I couldn’t go to a friend’s house just “because”. It always just meant she didn’t want to deal with taking me.

10. What are some weird quirks / rituals you do everyday?

lol the only thing I can think of is that I HAVE to pee right before I get into bed. It doesn’t matter if I just went and I only have a drop left, it must happen.

11. What was the weirdest / craziest thing that’s happened to you at work and/or school?

hmm... the only thing I can think of right now is from 3rd grade when I was playing soccer and the kid with the strongest foot punted the ball and it went smack into my face and I flew backward and blacked out. I totally had that playground moment of waking up with the whole student body looking over me and them going “UUUGGHH” when I sat up and bled from both nostrils.

These questions are from the beautiful, the flawless, the perfect, @vukica10. You complete me.

1. If you could go back at any time in history what would it be? (Ancient Egypt, Victorian era…)

By that do you mean, if I could go back and be a man in any time period because let’s face it... I’ve always been really interested in Rome... but I also really like Victorian stuff too.. idk IT’S TOO HARD

2. Fictional world you’d like to be a part of (except for SJM worlds)

Harry Potter duh

3. If you could visit only one country in your life, which one would it be?

France I guess? I’ve been there and I want to go back and stay for like 2 months.

4. Describe your perfect boy/girl

lol well... If we are talking about like the UNATTAINABLE PERFECT then:

Once I get my BSN I will be doing international nursing so I want some badass buff guy who like.. works for the UN, or some nonprofit, or like does security and is mr tough guy. Anyway you probably meant personality. I for sure have a Type, and that Type is confident cocky asshole on the surface with a warm gooey middle. Who knows the times that I just need a big shoulder to lean on and when I need someone to like, call be on my bullshit and be able to read me super well and just pokes and prods all my buttons instead of just sitting there oblivious to everything going on in my head. Those guys that are able to read you immediately and call you on it are super fucking hot.

5. If you could change one thing in history, what would it be

LOL JUST ONE??? I’d say eliminating the Cold War would rid the world of many ills. The US and Russia wouldn’t straight up fuck every other country over in their stupid propaganda war. Can you imagine how different things would be if we had somehow remained allies after WW2??

6. Tell me one embarrassing story

Well the most embarrassed I’ve ever felt was at a friends house when I was in the bathroom for a while and there was no TP, I yelled and yelled and yelled for my friend to bring me some and no one heard, so I walked out and her whole family was out there??? and her mom goes “... wasn’t there no toilet paper in there?... do you need to go upstairs and clean up?” And I was like hey thanks cunt yes I do, excuse me while I go die.

7. What language would you like to know?

I’ll go practical and say Spanish. Just because I keep thinking about how it would help me A TON as a nurse. But I also wish I actually got proficient in French

8. What was the happiest day of your life

I honestly have such a terrible memory for stuff like this. I can’t pick a single day!

9. If you have a chance to meet any celebrity and ask them one question, who would it be and what would you ask?

Pssshhh idk. Maybe Michael Fassbender or Jason Momoa and ask him to marry me??

10. Have you ever done something illegal/dangerous?

Nothing more than some pot and underage drinking. Now dangerous... Idk that’s a flexible term lol

11. What was on the latest photo you took?

My sister and I at a burgers and booze fest

These questions are from @starofvelaris

First of all. OMG I LOVE YOU. YOU’RE ART IS AMAZEBALLS. like how even do you do what you do??? I bought a tablet and i haven’t used it because photoshop is terrifying THANKS FOR THE TAG!!

1. An evil witch casts a spell on you, turning you into a plant. What kind of plant would you want to be?

Hmm... I’d like to be one of those really tall trees in the Amazon or something

2. If you could step into any fantasy world from any book series, which would you visit?

Harry Potter duuuuhhhhhh

3. Would you rather live in the Autumn Court or the Spring Court?

Well, are we talking about with the current people there... or like, if they were gone? Because I would totally choose Autumn

4. What toppings do you order on your pizza?

Pepperoni and Sausage!

5. Describe your ideal Friday night.

Well, if I’m not being a homebody and actually being social for once, then dinner, drinks, piano bar

6. Worst book you’ve ever read?

Frankenstein. I did a Classics binge and I could NOT make it through that one. I tried multiple times. Sorry guys I just DON’T get how that is a Classic other than the “never been done” aspect. Then again, there’s several beloved classics that I hate. Like the Great Gatsby. Ugh. Kill me with a spoon.

7. Night or day? Dawn or twilight?

Day, I can’t go all night I like sleep. Twilight- well it’s funny because I actually really do like nighttime but it’s like... the hours between 4 and 10 are my best hours LOL

[sannie-hannie-archive]

Tagged by the wonderful @jeongjarsofhannie for the get to know you tag. Thanks so much for tagging me <3 I love you and your blog so much!

Rules: Answer the questions and tag followers you would like to get to know better! 

Tagging: @angelyoons @hoshi-woozi @leetaeiil @bbysquirrelsblog @jeonghan-1004svt @jeonghans--idiot @scoup-dumplings @jeonfhan as always only if you want and are comfortable doing it you don’t have too if you don’t want too! Also to anyone else who sees this and wants to do it just make sure you tag me so I can see it :)

Name: Shay 

Nicknames: Shay (it’s my nickname but I go by it so much it’s basically my name) I have other nicknames but only one or two people can get away with calling me it so yeah lol

Zodiac Sign: Virgo

Height: 5′8/172 cm

Orientation: Straight 

Ethnicity:  American with a mix of Irish/French/Scandinavian? IDK my precise ethnicity lol

Favorite Fruit: ALL but if I had to choose I really like pineapple

Favorite Season: Winter (Fun fact never seen snow because I live in Florida)

Favorite Book: Maximum Ride/Confessions series by James Patterson

Favorite Flower: Hmm never really thought about it lol Carnations?

Favorite Scent: I like a lot of scents lol I don’t really have a fave

Favorite Colour: BLUE

Favorite Animal: ALL but if I had to choose polar bears

Favorite Beverage: Coffee (Peppermint Mocha)/Soda (Mountain Dew Baja Blast)/Tea/Water

Average Sleep Hours: 8-12 hours (yeah I sleep a lot but if I don’t get at least 8 prepare to die cuz I get unbearable)

Favorite Fictional Character: Yuna from Final Fantasy X/Lunafreya from Final Fantasy XV/Evie from Assassins Creed Syndicate/Raven from DC/Harley Quinn from DC/Scarlett Witch from Marvel/Mikasa from Attack on Titan/Adroid 18 from Dragon Ball Z/Hawkeye from Fullmetal Alchemist/Sephiroth from Final Fantasy VII/Zack from Final Fantasy VII Crisis Core/Noctis from Final Fantasy XV/Prompto from Final Fantasy XV/Riku from Kingdom Hearts/Captain America from Marvel/Quick Silver from Marvel/Edward Elric from Fullmetal Alchemist/Roy Mustang from Fullmetal Alchemist/Vegeta from Dragon Ball Z/Beerus from Dragon Ball Z/Erin from Attack on Titan....The list continues I have too many faves...

Number of blankets you sleep with: 1 if that...I don’t really need one here in Florida most times

Dream Trip: Ireland, London, Japan, Korea, Italy, Puerto Rico, Spain, Boston...I would love to travel the world tbh...

Blog Created: Ummm I know it was before Pretty U era...It was like a week before all the teasers started coming out :)

Hogwarts House: Everyone says Ravenclaw and I agree

Time Right Now: 1:21 PM

Lucky Number: Don’t have one

Last Thing I Googled: “5′8 in cm” IDK conversions lol

Favorite Bands/groups: I know this is a shocker but Seventeen, Pristin, SHINee, Twice, BTS, BlackPink, KARD, Red Velvet, SNSD, GFriend, EXO, NCT (mainly U and Dream if I’m being honest I’m not big on 127), Black Veil Brides, Bullet for my Valentine, Three Days Grace, Evanescence, and others I can’t really think of rn.

Favorite Solo Artist: Tbh I don’t really listen to a lot of solo artists lol IDRK any but I’ll say Andy Black

Song stuck in my head: Wee Woo by Pristin <3<3<3<3

Last movie watched: The Great Wall or Angels and Demons I can’t remember which one I watched first lol

Last TV show watched: Sleepy Hollow <3<3 but if Tuesday Night Smackdown counts then that was the last one I watched...I don’t really count it though so yeah

Dream job: Chef or Video Game Designer/Developer

Following: 313

Posts: 2,691

Do you get asks regularly: Not really but that’s alright when I do get them it’s just makes me even more happy and makes it even more special! <3 :) I love hearing from ya’ll

Do you have any other blogs: 1 but I never check it lol

What I Post About: Seventeen/Jeonghan/K-Pop with the occasional Video game/Anime post

Why you chose your url: Because I absolutely love/hate the “angel” Yoon Jeonghan

When Did My Blog Reach it’s Peak: Um IDRK if I consider it peaked at all yet but I am getting a lot more notifications and followers lately which makes me happy since I only really post garbage lol

Second game:

rules: bold the statements that apply to you!

appearance:

i am 5′7″ or taller

i wear glasses

i have at least one piercing

i have blonde hair

i have brown eyes

i have short hair

my abs are at least somewhat defined

i have or have had  braces

there is something i would change about the way i look

personality:

my hogwarts house is: gryffindor hufflepuff ravenclaw slytherin

i am an introvert

i like meeting new people

people tell me that i’m funny

helping others with their problems is a big priority for me

i enjoy physical challenges

i enjoy mental challenges

i’m playfully rude with people i know well

i started saying  something ironically and now i can’t stop saying it

there  is something i would change about my personality

ability:

i can sing well

i  can play an instrument

i can do over 30 pushups without stopping

i’m a fast runner

i can draw well

i have a good memory    

i’m  good at doing math in my head

i can hold my breath underwater for over a minute

i have beaten at  least 2 people in arm wrestling

i know how to cook at least 3 meals from scratch

i know how to throw a proper punch

hobbies:

i enjoy playing sports

i’m  on a sports team at my school or somewhere else

i’m in an orchestra or choir at my school or somewhere else

i have learned a new song in the past week

i work out at least once a week

i’ve gone for runs at least once a week

i have drawn something in the past month

i enjoy writing

fandoms are my #1 passion

i do or have done martial arts

experiences:

i have had my first kiss

i have had alcohol

i have scored the winning goal in a sports game

i have watched an entire season of a tv show in one sitting

i have been at an overnight event

i have been in a  taxi

i  have been in the hospital or er in the past year 

i have beaten a video game in one day

i have visited another country

i have been to one of my favourite band’s concerts

relationship:

i’m in a relationship

i have a celebrity crush

i have a crush on someone i know

i have been in at least 3 relationships

i have never been in a relationship

i have asked someone out or admitted my feelings to them

i get crushes easily

i have had a crush on someone for over a year

i have been in a relationship for at least a year

i  have had feelings for a friend

my life:

i have at least one person i consider a “best friend”

i live close to my school

my parents are still together

i have at least one sibling

i live in the united states 

there is snow right now where i live

i have hung out with a friend outside of school in the past month

i have a smartphone

i have at least 15 cds

i share my room with someone

random shit:

i have breakdanced

i  know a person named jamie

i  have had a teacher with a last name that’s hard to pronounce

i have dyed my hair (bright-ish red with blue ends the way I’ve been wanting it forever but only got it done last week)

i’m listening to one song on repeat right now  

i have punched someone in the past week

i know someone who has gone to jail

i have broken a bone

i have eaten a waffle today

i know what i want to do with my life

i speak at least 2 languages fluently (I wouldn’t say fluently but I do know a good bit of Spanish :))

i have made a new friend in the past year