#maladaptive problems

[lullxbyblue]

Every time I let someone know me I regret it

[dreamdropsystem]

in my daydreams i am loved and cared for. i will hide in my mind

[awesomecoolswaggirl]

maladaptive daydreamers of tumblr, do you also occasionally get stuck in daydream episodes where you just cant stop? no matter how hard you try. and it’s almost unwanted like, i just do it and i’m not even realizing i’m wasting a whole day daydreaming just trying to get back to reality and escape my head, but i physically cant. like the dissociation is so bad and you just kind of feel like you aren’t even living, the whole day goes by and you’re like huh

[madd-always]

[starspd]

begging people to understand that maladaptive daydreaming isnt just "likes to daydream" or "vivid imagination". no, it means i struggle to control when i daydream. most of the time i cannot listen to music or funny media without it triggering a daydream. i often spend hours a day daydreaming, and if im not at a place like school or in a car i cannot stop myself from pacing while i do it, even as im in excruciating pain from it (chronic pain). it can be physically painful when i try and resist daydreaming (though luckily that has started to get better).

it has impacted my mental health in many ways. i consume media that hurts me because its good for the daydream. it has impacted me participating in activities i want to do because its hard to stop daydreaming until it dies down on its own. it has impacted my memory. some days its easier, in some situations it can feel beneficial (though is that just the "coping skill" part of it talking?), but others it gets in the way of everything.

[greeney3db1tch]

this kind of pissed me off because some people who are responding to this is making it seem like maladaptive daydreaming is some whimsical nonsense and coming up with fake scenarios in order to sleep at night. while that can be true, MALADAPTIVE means negatively affecting to function daily.

like it is NOT normal.

no hate to OP! just to give my two cents

[local-lover-boy]

I hope to have a person in my life that makes me lose interest in maladaptive daydreaming because why would I go to fictional characters for comfort and love when you're right here

[sillygloworm]

How do you explain to those without MaDD that we don’t want to get rid of this disorder, even if it’s ruined our lives in more ways than one- we want to keep it because it’s also what’s kept us alive, and it’s part of us. Without it, there’s not much of us left because it’s created such an impact on our lives that it’s better to keep it now than get rid of it. It’s not curable, it’s not easy to cope with, and it’s not “fixable” but it can be managed. The difficult thing is we don’t want to manage it, that’s where the addiction comes in. We don’t want to manage it or get rid of it even if it harms us, because it’s been here for so long and the hole it’s made in our identity would create an even bigger one without it. So it’s very very hard to explain to others that we want to keep it even if it’s harmful, it allows us to escape and cope while keeping us sane and alive. A horrible, yet wanted disorder. Getting rid of it would mean getting rid of the people in your head, saying goodbye to them and never seeing nor speaking to them again. Our minds would go quiet, not a single voice nor place to escape into.

We need it just as much as it hurts us. -glo

[dreamingdreamdrop]

in my daydreams i am loved and cared for. i will hide in my mind

[simplygoingmadd]

“what are your dreams/goals?”

to live in my head with the tiny, mentally ill, whores that consume my mind all hours of the day and prevent me from experiencing real human interaction.

[brookie-writes]

my own little wonderland

It all started with a dream, the dream of a reality in which my life wasn't a mess. In that world, everyone liked me, and for once in my life, it felt good to be alive.

So my only thought the whole day was to go back to this dream as fast as possible. And I did !

I was able to continue developing this utopia. I realised I could shape it the way I wanted to because it was all in my head. So I started going to this reality at night, when no one was there to watch, and then sometimes when I was bored.It was slow, but it felt good. It felt good to be cared for, to be loved by others.

Slowly, I started to enjoy my life there much more than my "real" life... m

My friends, I grew distant from them, but they assumed I needed space, so they unconsciously let me fall deeper in that world.

My mom noticed as well, but she did not know what to do, after all everyone grieves in their own way, but as time passed, she grew worried that my state wasn't getting any better, quite the opposite. She did the only thing she knew could help me, and she brought me to a therapist. I did not want to go, so I stayed in my desired reality, locking myself in there. I was in a trance. No one could wake me up, no one but myself.I would just...lose myself, I suppose, but it felt good.

In this world, I didn't hold any pain. In that world, my dad was still with us. No one was lecturing me about my bad grades because I didn't have any.

I could shape this world exactly how I wanted it to be, and I would continue to do it until the end.

This world, my own little Wonderland, became my safe place.

I stayed there while the therapist was trying to wake me up, my mom crying next to her. They couldn't find me they couldn't reach me, no one could. After a while, I came back. The both of them were watching me with their eyes wide open.

The therapist, her name was Sophia, I think, asked me if I was comfortable with her asking me questions, and I agreed. I suppose I knew it was best for me, very deep inside though, even I didn't want to admit it.

She started questioning me, trying to discover my world, and for the first time in months, I felt listened to, I felt cared for, somewhere else than in my little Wonderland.

I started opening up slowly, answering to the best of my ability, giving details, and talking about the people inside this world and the way they act. It was going all too well, until she mentioned him, my father. Her question was innocent, trying to understand what caused me to create this dimension in my head, but it made me freeze.

The memories were coming back, the cries, the pain. I remembered his face, his voice, and tears started rolling down my cheeks.

No, no, NO, I can't be thinking about this, I can't be thinking about him, not right now, I'm not ready...

I was already preparing to go back to my world when Sophia said, "What about your mother? What will she become. She's in pain as well. She's grieving too."

I looked at her, tears still staining my eyes, as I pronounced my answer. "She is happy in my Wonderland, and I'll make sure she stays happy there. I will save her, I will save us. I can build this world however I want, I will do it, for the both of us".

And with that, I left.

[dreamdropsystem]

coping by daydreaming when literally any small inconvenience happens lmao

[awesomecoolswaggirl]

fellow maladaptive daydreamers, do you also feel really guilty and gross when your daydreams involve real people? like even if you can’t help it

[lullxbyblue]

Day 2 of sobriety

[nsuiswitch]

Welcome ✨ Madders ✨! It's time to play, do I actually like this piece of media or, have I based my entire daydream world and personal identity around it and have become so emotionally attached to it as a result that I feel like it's a part of me when in reality the majority of the things I see in it I have projected onto it...

[tvlipsandbread]

How about we not romanticize maladaptive daydreaming because it literally ruins lives (this is a cry for help)