#idk if that video even got traction or if I was just one of a few people who saw it

[cerealmonster15]

There’s this one workplace safety video that someone posted a clip from on here a while ago of a coworker saying something like “I’m going to kill you, hurt you, or harm you in some way 😐” and it haunts my subconscious but I can NEVER find it when I go searching. does anyone know what the hell im talking about.

anyway jamiazu doodle

[thehealingsystem]

nate please please please please I am shaking you by the shoulders right now no one needs to do this please you can make a actual thought provoking interesting thumbnail for the song you don't need to appeal to clickbait algorithms anymore you're still letting yourself be bound to it people loved your early original songs for what they were without this. please stop doing this please stop changing thumbnails I am going to cry

[ikissjude]

one round? 🎮 lhs

in which you and gamer!heeseung name aspects of your relationship | tiktok series

gamer bf!heeseung x fem!reader, warnings: cursing, dialogue heavy, suggestive at the end, fluff, crack-ish (idk i think i’m funny), kinda short, wc: 452

“now stand right here and act like you’re walking to your desk,” you directed your boyfriend, heeseung, for the tiktok that you wanted to make.

to start gaining traction on your couple’s page, you decided to participate in a trend that details your lives as a gamer couple. it only made sense considering the page would be the two of you streaming together and uploading highlights.

“now when i say go, start walking, and say whatever comes to mind,” heeseung couldn’t help the smile on his face, seeing how serious you were about directing your little video.

“alright, and go.”

“we’re a gamer couple; of course we obviously met on league.” heeseung walked to his set-up, pretending to open up the game.

“oh baby, you’re a natural! actors around the world should be scared,” you beamed. heeseung chuckled at your compliment. “alright, now for my turn, i’m gonna do the same thing, but we’re gonna cut to us both playing a round. sound good?”

“of course, miss boss lady. tell me what to do.”

after setting up the tripod, you got into position.

“we’re a gamer couple; of course we get super competitive with each other.”

the two of you then played a round against each other, with you winning, of course. you figured you got a good clip with the two of you shittalking each other. it was like that the entire time, the two of you taking turns back and forth with you directing. heeseung found you the cutest, getting so into this 15-second clip.

“we’re a gamer couple; of course our set-ups are side by side.” heeseung’s idea naturally, he wanted to keep you by his side at all times, even when he gamed.

“we’re a gamer couple; of course i spend all of his money on games and dlcs.” you said with a smirk on your face.

“hey!” heeseung giggled. “you can’t say that, the guys are gonna call me a simp.”

“you are a simp, hee. and weak-willed."  you laughed.

“alright then, i have something for your ass.” heeseung walked over to his chair and sat with his legs spread wide. tilting your head, you decided to just go with it.

“we’re a gamer couple; of course she asks to sit on my dick while i game.”

“oh my god, heeseung!” you screamed, face heating up in embarrassment. “you really can’t say that.”

“why not?” he laughed before reaching out to grab your hands. he slowly pulled you into his lap, your legs connected to his hips. he knew just how to fluster you. you kept your head down to avoid further embarrassment, but he lifted your chin to meet his gaze.

“it’s true, is it not?”

© ikissjude 2024

[jujutsubaby]

🍒 only fans boyfriend!toji headcanons 🍒

☆ pairing: toji fushiguro x afab!reader ☆ summary: blurb in which toji is your bf who helps you take your photos and videos for your onlyfans ☆ warnings: 18+ !! MINORS DNI !! dirty talking, nudes, sex work, penetrative sex, idk what else lol ☆ a/n: i'm having some serious toji brain rot send help

bf!toji who first thinks of the idea of you doing an only fans after taking his millionth video of him pounding into you. he won’t lie, initially it was because he was tight on some cash and didn’t wanna borrow from you again, but he was convinced you could be some insane OF celebrity. “i’m not sure about it, toji. i don’t want randos to see my face…” you surmise. “c’mon, we’ll cover your face, doll, if that’s what you’re worried about. i swear, we could be raking in thousands from this.” the prospect of coming across a large amount of money like that was enticing…

bf!toji who suggests that you start out simple. “maybe just a shot of you wearing somethin’ cute for the camera, i dunno.” after work one day, you both go to a lingerie store and pick out a sheer pink babydoll slip on, with silky bows on the shoulders. at home, you fish out an old mid 2000s digital camera from the garage and present it to toji. “you’re gonna be my sexy photographer, right?” you tease, as you change into the babydoll slip dress. 

bf!toji who totally sucks at taking photos at first, but is a quick learner as he learns all your best angles and poses. turns out when money is on the line, he’s a hard worker after all. pictures of you sluttily sticking out your tongue, and the dress straps falling off your shoulders send toji into a frenzy, and you both take a quick sex break before going back to taking the photos.

bf!toji doesn’t know how to edit photos for shit so you use the minimal photoshop you know to spruce up your makeshift boudoir shoot. not to toot your own horn, but you kinda ate those pics up, and toji can’t get enough of it. at work, he’s partially distracted, fighting off enemies with half a brain as the other half is trying not to get turned on (one time, he did get turned on while fighting and it was awkward to say the least. the guy’s dead now so toji doesn’t really care). 

bf!toji who creates the OF account for you because you’re feeling too shy to do so. the interface is confusing for both of you at first, but you guys get the hang of it pretty easily. you post the boudoir photoshoot and immediately close the laptop because you’re terrified of it flopping. “the damage of no one subscribing to me, toji, i would die,” you say earnestly, feeling nauseous. “if no one subscribes to you, i’ll fuck the memory out of you, don’t worry,” he says nonchalantly as he picks a random show on netflix to watch. he’s not bothered by this even one bit and you think it’s because he doesn’t care but really, it’s because he’s that confident.

bf!toji who wakes up before you the next morning for work and quickly checks to see if your photos gained any traction. “holy shit, doll, wake up!” he practically pushes you off the bed as he shakes you and you groggily wake up, irked at the intrusion of your slumber. “toji, i swear to god i’ll kill y-” “you just got 300 subscribers overnight, shut up.” he says, cutting you off and meeting your lips with a tender kiss. you quickly pull back, eyes widening at the news. 

bf!toji who reassures you that you’re only gonna blow up more, and that’s why you need to post more photos and videos. it starts off small: simple photoshoots and more slutty lingerie. you arch your back as toji gets an ass shot with your camera. he slaps it hard, leaving a red handprint mark and snaps a couple more photos. 

bf!toji who encourages you to start doing videos after reaching over 1k subscribers. you do a little strip tease/dance while toji films, but the first time you do it, toji folds almost immediately and has you pinned under him. you try again the next day, and graduate to longer more explicit videos – fingering yourself, using toys, and live streaming. toji buys you a couple cute masquerade masks to use, too. 

bf!toji who loves it when you get donations during streams. he ends up creating an amazon wishlist for you of things you guys could really use around the house. he can’t remember the last time he bought you lingerie anymore because your donations would usually cover that cost. that being said, he always chooses lingerie for you. he knows exactly what other horny guys are looking for on girls. “doll, i know crotchless panties are awful but i know the male gaze – they don’t give a fuck. look, okay, i’ll buy you that one piece too, don’t give me that look.” he says to you as you throw in a bunch of lingerie of your liking in the cart. 

bf!toji who finally decides to join you in front of the camera, giving your fans what they wanted. the way he sees it, he fucks you senseless for free every night anyway, might as well get paid for it. toji makes a show to tear your nice lingerie off you and leaves visible marks in your skin from his touch as he pounds into you or bites your neck. 

bf!toji who joins you on your livestreams, and they usually end with you bent over a desk, skirt hiked up, and his arousal deep inside you. “you guys think she deserves to cum?” he asks the chat, feeling you clench against him. he knows you're close, and it turns you on knowing it’s out of your control on whether or not you get to feel a release. your fans love your pornographic and lewd moans, but with toji fucking you, you don’t even have to act for them to come out of your mouth naturally. speaking of your mouth, toji especially loves when you have a masquerade mask on while he makes your little throat gag. you love it when he tests your gag reflex on camera in front of an audience, and everyone can tell when they see you soaked through your panties.

bf!toji who surprises you by taking you on a lavish vacation to bora bora when you reach over 10k subscribers. “we built this shit together,” he says, talking about your OF fame and money. you can’t remember the last time you guys worried about paying rent, and he wanted to do something special for his slutty little doll. he got one of those seaside huts surrounded by a private deck. your breath is taken away by the surprise, and toji wastes no time getting all your clothes off and getting you into the water. the makeout session turns into him fingering you underwater as he pushes your bikini to the side. after coming all over his fingers, you give him a handjob under the water, and toji has to quickly climb out of the pool so he doesn’t cum inside it and has to request a clean up on the very first day. 

bf!toji who fucks you more times than you can count in the water, on the bed, in the infinity pool, that one time super discretely under the blanket in the beach. you bring up the idea of filming a little here and there on vacation. “what? the grind never stops,” you say jokingly as you set up the camera on the tripod in front of the bed. he surprises you by using some silk ribbons to tie your hands back while he licks and kisses every inch of your body, focusing especially on your sensitive nipples erect for the camera. he blindfolds you, hands still tied back while he eats you out. the electrifying sensations are amplified in the darkness of the blindfold, and you make an absolute mess on the sheets and his mouth. 

bf!toji who uses the last night of your trip there to convince you to film one more video, this time on the private infinity pool outside your hut. you come out with a black strappy bikini with a sheer babydoll cover up. “don’t take off your clothes just yet, doll. just come in the water.” he commands, and you slowly get into the water. his silhouette looks ethereal in the golden hour of the sunset as you approach him. he cradles your jaw and kisses you deeply and passionately.  

bf!toji pulls away from you and guides you to the edge of the pool that stares out to the pink sunset and the turquoise ocean. “what? gonna fuck me while looking at the sunset like a stupid romantic?” you jeer, poking his chest. he chuckles nervously. “eventually…”

bf!toji who pulls a small black box from behind him and opens it to reveal a big shiny diamond ring. tears start freely falling down your cheeks and you don’t even hear what toji is saying (you feel a little bad – he must’ve prepped this speech for a while but you were far too emotional to process anything). all you do is nod your head vigorously as he gently puts the ring on finger. a perfect fit. and it glistens just perfectly in the dimming sun.

fiance!toji who then fucks you into the sunset like a stupid romantic.

[witheringwidgetwrites]

could I get one of the OM boys reacting to a singer-songwriter or musician MC? i'd love to hear you're thoughts on it!

Ahh im down! Here are some ways they'd appreciate MC!! I tried to be fairly general with these? But i have the most experience w jazz, and classical stuff soo idk. I also played bass clarinet and clarinet lol so my bias will prob show

LUCIFER

Casually encourages MC to join 1 of the few clubs at RAD.

He is the 2nd most likely to discuss the formalities of music. Will listen outside your room and mention it casually later, probably after most of his brother have left the dinner table.

Once you grow closer, he's prone to not falling asleep until you sing to him. Soft stuff, even if thats not your normal, he just loves it. Won't ever say it much, but wow it brings him so much comfort.

He used to mind listening when he was trying to do paperwork, but as your relationship progresses, he's a lot more willing. Brings him a little bit of peace.

If you ever decide to post publically, he goes all out to support you. Watches your videos a couple times a day, leaves a single, well thought out comment on the details in your music. An analysis, if you will. Asks his brothers a couple times a week if they've shared it.

MAMMON

Jumps at the chance to support you, even if he's tsundere about it. Comments under different profiles, shares your socials allll over. Especially at his modeling gigs. You'll get traction fairly quickly. Even if it's not what you wanted

Loses his mind if you sing softly to him. He'll feel like he has all your attention just feels so loved and cared for. Will probably get in his feelings and start crying.

Also asks his brothers if they've liked/watched anything you might post.

Tendency to listen outside your door when he hears you singing, even if it's while you shower.

Takes you on late night car rides just to hear you laugh and sing to the radio. He'd drive for hours if you let him.

Definitely falls asleep when you hum or sing slower songs for him. It ends up becoming almost like a routine for him, he starts to struggle to sleep without you.

LEVIATHAN

Takes him quite a while to hear you sing. He just hasn't had the opportunity. The first time he hears you sing, he's captivated. Would never ask you to sing for him outright however, but would stealthily try and get you to karaoke with him. (Like he'd actually sing tho lol)

Probably records it and listens to it sometimes. One of his biggest guilty pleasures.

Once you get closer, he'll turn his game music down to listen to you hum or sing softly to yourself, never mentions it, but enjoys it quietly. Usually feels the blood rush to his face though, as it feels really intimate to him.

Will lowkey ask for help cleaning his room, or asks if he can help you clean yours, just because he knows you'll start singing.

If you ever show him your lyrics, expect him to be speechless. He's pretty blown away by your trust, compliments you quietly, he doesn't want to scare you away.

ASMODEUS

The most outright to ask you to sing for him. He hears you for the first time when he takes you to a party at The Fall. He's captivated instantly, stays close to you to hear you better in the loud surroundings. Claps for sure.

He also takes you to karaoke. He'll sing with you, but lets you have most of the solos. It's odd for him to not be the center of attention, but he absolutely adores showing you off!

Is very likely to record and post a video of you that goes viral because he already has many followers. He is very excited to show you how much love your video got!

Tries to help you come up with song ideas. He's not a ton of help, but he tries!

Asks you to write him a love song. 100%

SATAN

First time he hears you, you're singing softly to yourself in the almost/empty library. He stays behind a stray bookshelf to avoid spooking you. He listens for a while before he slides in the chair next to you.

He leans his head back, closing his eyes, "Have you heard Blue Skies by by Ella Fitzgerald?" He pauses, "you should sing something for me sometime."

Likes to read your song writing, it's like poetry to him. He feels like he's able to understand you more. He likes being closer to you.

Some nights, he'll play music in his room before inviting you in, taking your hand and slow dancing with you. He enjoys the closeness, and he loves listening to you hum softly to the music. After the first couple times, he learned to clear his floor a little.

As you get closer, you're likely to find yourself singing him to sleep. Playing with his soft blonde locks while he dozes off in your lap, his book long forgotten.

BEELZEBUB

He first hears you late at night when he's in the kitchen. He actually stops himself mid-bite for a moment before shaking his head, realizing he can eat and listen at once. He pauses once you finish and step into the kitchen.

"Very nice MC, please do another one." He almost cocks his head a little despite not phrasing it as a question.

Asks you if it's a popular human world song, he's impressed when you tell him that you wrote it! "Do you have any other ones?" He looks like a big puppy and it's so hard to say no, so you stay for a while and sing to him while he eats.

After you grow closer, he finds himself in your lap more often than not, and he's almost as sleepy has Belphie when you sing him those soft songs again.

BELPHIE

He first hears you as you come up the stairs to the attic. Your voice is almost luring him to sleep. He's almost enraged after he realizes it's you.

First time he really hears you is when he enters the planetarium and you're already there. He's quiet, you're not entirely comfortable with him yet, and he wants to listen.

Skipping the angst, as you grow closer, he'll ask you to sing him to sleep. He enjoys laying in your lap in the planetarium while you sing him something.

He's likely to start asking you regularly about your writing. "Anything new today, MC?" frowns a little when you say no.

He's uncharacteristically eager to see and hear your new work, especially as you grow closer.

Very likely you'll have him and Beel laying in your lap fairly often while the drift off to sleep at the sound of your voice.

[jbdforspence]

Rmember when I made like SCU headcanons or some shit (Smosh Cinematic Universe)? Well some of y’all really liked that and I’m getting chosen lore brainrot after the live so I’m making another for purely chosen lore 🥰🥰

Disclaimer: these are all my headcanons, unless I like say or some shit all of this is being made up in my brain because I think it’s cool or whatever, don’t take this as fact at all but like u can also headcanon what I’m saying bro idk 💀😭😭

Bro my ass essentially made my own fucking story or fanfic plot or whatever 😭😭😭

Also this shit is a long ass ramble so if u don’t wanna bother just be known one of the headcanons is that Shayne and Spencer’s chosen are in a purely romantic relationship ❤️ (SOMEONE BETTER MAKE A FANFIC OF THEM)

Okay… so getting the most important chosen thing out of the way, chosen is not bullshitting, the chosen all have real powers and shit and are from different dimensions, doesn’t mean they aren’t also loser awkward virgins though they’re still that but just are also powerful Jedi mfs lmao

Now for the next one I’m gonna use into the spiderverse as a good example. All dimensions have a Spider-Man, however not all Spider-Man are Peter Parker, while he still exists in some of those dimensions, like Gwen’s.

So, all dimensions have a chosen, however there are different chosen in different dimensions (if the chosen is played by a different cast member it’s not the same chosen, except mb Olivia’s we’ll get to that 💀) and a person who is chosen in one dimension won’t be chosen in another. Let’s use the chosen who faps, that chosen is that dimension’s Chanse, in that dimension Chanse is chosen.

Now you may IMMEDIATELY be thinking abt the main chosen, Shayne Topp and the chosen are from the same dimension. Well this is my most controversial headcanon, Shayne’s chosen is NOT from our dimension. But then who is our dimension’s chosen? ANTHONY PADILLA.

Anthony was a chosen, but then fapped or something (I have faint memories of the funeral roast) and is like calamity chosen and shit and no longer chosen. This is what attracted Shayne’s chosen to our dimension, as an incredibly powerful chosen he was drawn to this dimension as it completely lacked any chosen.

Oh yh and u may be thinking “but the main chosen’s name is Spencer Agnew… so he’s not Shayne Topp…” you think your parents are gonna give you the same name in every dimension buddy? You might not even have the same parents!

Anyways main chosen is stunned by our world as to how unchosen it is (normalised gooning) and comes here a bunch to try and change that, he also looks for some form of way to get his presence known on some kind of public platform, which is where smosh/smosh Vegas comes into play. (Where he was first introduced)

This is now a side headcanon: Smosh Vegas was this event hosted by Smosh to get unknown talent onto the channel to have their chance at possible success in some form of entertainment route for their future, which is where all these new characters (a lot of which we never see again coz it was for just that event and they didn’t gain much traction or popularity or whatever, bleeding into real life here). Smosh mostly picked weird and wacky individuals, think like reality tv show casting 💀, so the chosen most obviously got accepted onto Vegas.

Now I have not fact checked this but I’m pretty sure the chosen was the only character introduced in Vegas who came back afterwards, he was also one of the few in more than one video. I’d say he found success in entertainment, the audience loved him he could’ve gone on to do his own thing and shit, but he stayed with Smosh.

This is where my headcanons start to get really silly and in fanfic territory or whatever. Why did the chosen stay with Smosh? Well it’s a great public outlet for getting his ideas out there, they (us) loved him! But he also stayed due to other reasons. The chosen knows about Anthony, that’s why he’s here in the first place of course he knows what happened. But Anthony was long gone and presumed never coming back when the chosen came, so staying at smosh because of Anthony would be a stupid idea.

No, there was something else at smosh… SOMEONE. Charles Spencer Agnew, more commonly known as Spencer Agnew. They had almost the exact same name while not being variants of each other, the chosen couldn’t think that was just due to coincidence!! He believed it was some kind of sign and decided to stay to investigate what it meant. This is also why the chosen and Spencer are in heaps of vids together (…early on at least 👀)

Okay so now we’ve gotten the silly origin story out of the way and this is already like the longest post I’ve ever made 😭😭😭

The chosen begins to host Chosen Multiverses. This is a common chosen practice to see which chosen are strongest, the chosen just decided to start hosting it in our dimension as 1. Public platform and 2. This universe has no chosen so 5 chosen being there benefits.

An important part about these competitions!!! I believe this is canon coz it was mentioned once, when you win a chosen multiverse you are upgraded to “the chosen” over just being “chosen”, meaning Shayne, Spencer, Ian and Angela’s chosen are all the chosen.

Anyways here’s the silly part that’s inspired this and has ao3 vibes. The first multiverse is where we meet Spencer, Jackie and mb Courtney’s (idk if they did a tntl bit first but oh well!) chosen for the first time. Also Noah who thankfully canonically doesn’t have a chosen as he’s actually some merch ad and not a real chosen 😘.

Main chosen is truly stunned by Spencer’s chosen… as they are equal in power. Main chosen has never come across anyone close to his power, which is also why Spencer’s chosen comes back all the time. Now we also already established that Shayne and Spencer’s chosen are NOT THE SAME PERSON, and are variants of their respective cast members. So this brings us to the main headcanon for why I made this:

Shayne and Spencer’s chosen are romantically attracted to one another and have a purely romantic relationship.

Now the chosen is canonically not asexual (Shayne said in a Lego stream), I’m not here to headcanon sexuality stuff but I do agree with this and they’re constantly battling their urge to fap and shit coz of their Jedi duty .

Anyways the chosen already isn’t straight coz he canonically sucked Tim’s dick in the matrix (don’t ask) so when u think abt it not very far fetched ❤️

Anyways this brings us to the actual fuckinng livestream Jesus I’m so sorry for the LENGTH of this ramble

If you remember the trailer, it starts as Anthony hitting his head and having a “dream sequence”. Guys let me cook with this next one cos I’m proud lowkey: as Anthony is a chosen anomaly, he still kinda has powers, and the whole sitcom is a micro dimension created by Anthony’s brain after his accident that 3 chosen venture into to contain and eliminate it from existence. This is also why they kinda break the 4th wall in the script and stuff and almost spectate the whole live because they are aware that it’s fake.

Not really too sure what to think of the weed thing btw 💀 anyways yh so chosen!shayne x chosen!spencer canon plsplsplsssss

Also they’re teaching Trevor’s chosen btw that’s why the bring him (yet to be ready for a multiverse, which also btw I was 100% expecting him to be in this years multiverse, like I was thinking the lineup would be him and Arasha over Spencer and Courtney) and Shayne and Spencer’s chosen are dealing with it coz they’re the most powerful.

Uuhhh yeah cool so sorry u had to read all that lmao I probably missed some stuff like loopholes or whatever, I’d love to answer questions in the comments in shit so yh!

Ps: someone make a fucking fanfic of chosen Spencer and chosen Shayne PLEASE

Oh yh I also forgot to mention normal Spencer chosen by proxy and Olivia’s chosen but oh well they weren’t important…

[mcl38]

lmao i had to unfollow a mclaren moot because they took the "twink" thing to an extreme and were pointing out how he's just oscar's little twink and would always be fragile and small instead of big and strong and fit like "broadscar" and i really just had to. 🤦‍♀️ fit? FIT? lando was the only driver not on the brink of fainting after qatar, not everything in f1 is about how "broad" and "muscular" you seem. i wanted to give the benefit of doubt at first but when the fetishizing gay relationships turned into pushing these bodyshaming stereotypes onto a literal professional athlete i was out.

i mean its so wild bc half of them seem to give the twink descriptor to both drivers and half specifically pin it on lando because hes smaller than oscar & make it into a whole Dynamic of lando being sooo toppable or whatever. which just shows that there isnt actually any weight to 'twinklaren' at all and it rly is meaningless, bc surely if it was clear cut and obvious these differences wouldnt exist ykwim? like its just about what serves their fandom purpose in that moment

idk i think as much as the term broadscar is unfortunately quite funny to me, f1 fandom discussions abt weight and bodies r kind of bound to become problematic (real sense not 2014 tumblr sense) bc of the requirements of the sport. the way lewis has said that hes not allowed to bulk up because it would make his weight balance too lopsided (as a side note u guys do not know how ready i am for post retirement bicep BEAST lewis hamilton. the only way im gonna survive him retiring) etc like its not just about appearance for them.

in terms of how lando is fit like ur 100% right - stuff like qatar shows that he (and jon) has been doing his due diligence w preparing for these conditions. u can also just see in that last quadrant video how hes obviously very physically fit and ready for the season. its just that bodies have natural differences between them - oscar is genetically taller, lando is genetically more flexible; oscar is naturally broader around his arms, lando is naturally broader around his back, etc. and its not necessarily an issue to point these things out or even joke about them (when ppl say daniel's got birthing hips it still makes me laugh and its been years since i first heard it) but at some point it does start to show a fundamental misunderstanding of what f1 drivers do. like do i need to pull up the real sweat im a high performance athlete clip or what

so thats on the body stuff. re: the twink stuff i think the reason it rubs me, you, many ppl wrong even before we consciously realise it is like. a twink is a type - not just a body type, a *type*. in the gay male* community, you identify yourself as a twink (or bear, otter, etc) because some people are particularly attracted to twinks, bc they have a type. then obviously because the gay community is way more than just sexual attraction & has a lot of cultural capital, the term twink gained connotations and cultural history etc and grew past that. but the origins are still very much in gay male* attraction. so now that the term has become accessible to ppl who arent in that community, and therefore arent *participating*, identifying someone by their physical characteristics (and maybe implied penetrative sex preference) no longer has the subtext of appeal, but of derision. because no longer is it implied that everyone involved is a gay man*, which means calling someone a twink also implicitly calls them gay. and i think 'twink' specifically gained traction compared to other types also bc of its association w femininity in one's physical appearance - which, again, ur just derogatorily calling someone feminine and gay. even if, say, ur a member of the lgbt community who isn't a gay man*, it still carries the subtext - like anon u completely correctly identified the condescending undertones of whoever ur talking about. which is why i say we should just bring back fag #justsayfag

[respitelocklyre]

Can't have SHIT in Strixhaven 🤦

[The following was never actually posted and exists only as a draft in Respite's socials]

I swear, can't one thing just be normal here? 😭 Or like can't it at least be weird in a fun way and not a scary, near-death-experience-waiting-to-happen way??? It's annoying enough my date night turned into a group date night, but now my date night's turning into a whole-ass rescue mission. And like, yeah, of COURSE I'm not gonna say no to freeing a bunch of enslaved people from a horrible hag now that we KNOW about it, but I wish Sersh hadn't gone digging in the first place. Like, ignorance is bliss, y'know?

I guess I shouldn't complain 😮‍💨 Like, obvs the market workers have it worse with the whole stolen souls and enslavement thing. It just feels like a big ask, is all. idk, im glad Jav is bringing some backup at least. His party seems pretty good from what I could gather. Even if I am dreading seeing Rubina again 😬 I haven't talked to her much since Thad fucking SNUBBED her in the cafe after she helped us. No hard feelings, I hope 🙄

OH And y'know what one of the worst parts is?? I got some GREAT footage to post an update about the market on my socials tomorrow- Mire adopted this crazy peacock-hawk hybrid bird (peakhawk?) and I won a super cool magical deck of cards from a little jackalope man!! 🃏🪄🎩 He did some really impressive card tricks! And now I can't even use any of it because...

Wait, fuck, I'm gonna have to make a whole other video where I explain that I didn't know this place was run by a hag that uses slave labor when I made my FIRST video supporting it. I guess on the flip side, callout posts usually get a lot of traction. Actually, I'll keep filming. Then I can still use the other footage to garner sympathy for the workers. This can still work in my favor ✍️

Anyways, I should probably stay focused till we finish up here because it kinda sounded like Willow's sister, Meadow, might be in some kinda danger too. She apparently got all involved with this fae crown that's cursed and drives people mad, but the crown ended up here in the market. Some rando named Gleeful Lee has it now i guess and they're the main performer here. We'll probably learn more about the crown and the deck of many things once we free everyone, so that's our plan atm. Me, Mire, Sersh, Thad are just chilling until the show starts, and then we're gonna slink around and find those contracts while everyone's distracted.

[magicalbats]

hi it's doesn't-play-genshin-but-loves-your-genshin-fics anon i just wanted to report back: i've completed so many 'genshin lore for beginners' and 'genshin storyline so far' videos, and i'm eyeballs deep in fanart and random fics (especially childe dear LORD him especially god i love him oh my goddd) and i'm so blown away by how deep the story is for the game ???

i knew people praised the game for the characters and story but i didn't think it'd be THIS good, and i'm so grateful you encouraged me to go read up on it.............. the fact that some of the characters are just like regular people and others are straight up literal gods among men is hilarious and also sososo cool to me. zhongli's story was so cool and i love the fact that he's so deeply and intricately intertwined with liyue harbor and its people ;-; ♡

anway thank you it's all thanks to you ily thank you for broadening my horizons

Omggg anon 🥹 I’m so glad you’re enjoying everything so far! And just to tell you a little bit about my own experience, so you know it’s not just you who was a bit blind sided by the depth of the world building xmdmxmdm

I’ve tried a handful of other gacha’s in the past and I just could not get into them for anything. There was one I do actually really like on a theoretical level xmsmxks but I hated the game mechanics. I only played it for a few months before dropping it completely so I was very wary about getting into Genshin at first because I honestly thought I’d be wasting my time and it would just be something else I got no enjoyment out of. Im sure you can imagine my great surprise when I quickly realized this wasn’t just another cheap gacha with bare minimum effort put into it. It’s a whole ass world with extensive history and real, honest to god lore. The characters not only have their own individual backstories that span across various fields and interests and cultural inspirations, but Mihoyo at least puts in some work to further flesh them out beyond that too. Even the ones we’re still waiting to get any real spotlight shown on them have a fountain of potential just waiting to be untapped! It’s super exciting imo, to see how everything slowly fits into place to create the bigger picture of a fully functioning fictional universe, how each character is leading their own individual lives, but then you also add onto that how there are plenty of mysterious unknowns and future developments ahead of us too …

Frankly Genshin’s lore has done nothing but impress me. It gets confusing at times, yes, and occasionally theories that don’t make a lick of sense will gain traction to blur the lines even more, but overall this world feels very alive to me and our role as the traveler can be a very immersive one. I have been nothing if not impressed by the world building but it’s the characters that truly pulled me in and never let me go. lol I started playing specifically for Zhongli … and by the time I actually met him I was already hooked. 🤣 I’ve been obsessed with this damn game basically since day one and I’m still in a chokehold over a year later.

But ooooh, a Childe fan are we? 👀 I am in no way surprised, he is QUITE a man. Idk how up to date you are with the current storyline but uh, I am eagerly awaiting version 4.2 so we can see him again! (Potential spoiler??) The way he gave us his vision in 4.0 actually had me

Please feel free to come back and share all your thoughts with me! What other characters do you like? Favorite region? Which bit of lore do you find the most interesting?? I need the deets, anon! Please!

[zadkiel-18]

(Hi! I’m trying my hand with something I’ve never done before. It’ll be cheesy, and probably not very good, but whatever, I’m just doing this for fun. For myself and if this gets any traction, I want to create a fun experience that people can look fondly back on. This is… sort of an interactive creepypasta, where your feedback would impact the choices the character makes. I might talk as myself, the person behind Zadkiel, sometimes. But it’ll mostly be Zadkiel or some of the other characters talking. I know what the major story is, but I am excited to see where it goes. I know there might be better sites for this than tumblr, but idk where else to go. There are Scarvi spoilers, enjoy-)

So… I need some advice. I’ve loved Pokémon for years. For the past 4 generations I’ve bought the games directly as they’ve come out. For Scarlet and Violet, I believed I would do the same. I have a friend, who’s name I will not say to keep her anonymous, had another idea. I was…. In rough times, financially. It was wrong, I know… but she works for Nintendo, and I convinced her to steal a game for me. She did it, of course she did. She owed me one. I don’t know where she found it, it wasn’t in a case, only the disk itself. It looked like a normal Scarlet disk, so I put it in my Switch.

The game ran normally. The music was fine, there were no suddenly bleeding eyes. I made my character- a boy with ash hair and blue eyes- and named him Zadkiel. I picked my starter as usual, a Fuecoco I named Odin.

I battled Nemona and won. I never understood why the game made the rivals choose the Pokémon weak to yours, and why Nemona was so shocked I knew type differences.

With Nemona defeated I continued onward. I caught a Lechonk, and I didn’t give it a nickname, since it’s name is perfect already. Then, I continued on until the cutscene where you meet Koraidon. I didn’t realize it at the time, but something was wrong. Where there were supposed to be Houndour and Houndoom, instead there were Vulpix and Ninetails, who apparently aren’t even coded into the game. I was just excited, because Ninetails is one of my favorite Pokémon and I was excited to see them in the game.

The game continues to work normally. Or, I guess, like any other Scarvi game considering I clipped through the floor into a dark void then got transported back up. But that’s just what happens in Scarvi. The screen flashed black when Arven showed up for the first time, but again, Scarvi has performance issues.

I battled trainers and evolved Odin before going to the academy. Listen, I like being overleveled, it feels good to be so powerful. My moves one shot things, I can get through battles and just explore. I wish the NPCs acknowledged how good the trainer character is more often, they should be afraid of me.

Back to the point. I got to the academy and everything went as normal still. I talked with Nemona and she told me about the gyms. It was when I talked to Arven that things started to get weird. His movements were robotic. I saw a video on the boss fight at the end of the game with the AI professor, it looked like that. I knew he was supposed to tell me about the Titans, but instead he told me to go to 5 “cuts”. They were in the spots I knew the Titans would be, but in the spot where the picture of the titan should be, there was only a black circle.

Okay, so like I said, I need advice. I know the game isn’t supposed to do this. But at the same time, I’m curious. Is this a plot that was scrapped? Would anyone have seen this if I didn’t get it? So, what I’m asking is, should I go to the cuts?

[sebdoeswords]

Oh boy oh boy, I will take any chance i can get to talk about chaperons.

Here is a great video on the origin of them

In short (spoiler alert, it's not gonna be short), medieval peasants who worked outside would often wear hoods (not how we know them today, as attached to a coat or jacket, but separate pieces of clothing that would extend a little past the shoulder) to keep warm. But if they got too warm, or the weather changed, they'd have to take them off and either put them somewhere or carry them around. So what they did instead was roll up the face opening and put that newly created rim on their head, effectively wearing the hood upside down. the residual fabric and liripipe (the little dangly bit you see on the back of medieval hoods, which we should definitely bring back btw) would drape in folds around the head.

As with many things invented by the common folk for practicality, this gained traction and was adopted by upper classes, who then refined the concept into fashionable items that were designed as hats and no longer served their purpose as hoods. The liripipe also got a lot longer the more chaperons were just worn for fashion in order to drape it over one's shoulder, and Roche's looks to be one of those. There are tons of variations, and you can see many of them in the wikipedia article above.

In the witcher games, you can often see NPCs other than Roche wear chaperons as well, especially merchants. Now as to why he would be wearing one I don't know, I can only assume he likes how they look. In reality, going into battle like this wouldn't exactly be practical, and a helmet would certainly be preferred, but pretty much no major or significant side character wears a helmet into battle (except the Aen Elle) simply for the reason that they obstruct the characters' facial expressions and make them less recognisable. Idk about you, but I struggle to read faces, so if characters wore helmets, I probably would not recognise most of them.

So no, the chaperon, aside from maybe cushioning blunt blows, probably doesn't have much value in battle, especially with the long liripipe that would definitely swing around and provide something for enemies to grab. But then again the same goes for Roche's medallion (and Geralt's. I often wonder how he doesn't poke an eye out with its spikes).

Neither Ciri's outfit, or Yennefer's heels, or Ves' open shirt are practical for the roles they fulfill in the story. Game designs often (and sometimes unfortunately) forego practicality in favour of uniqueness and style, and Roche definitely looks unique with his chaperon. I dare even say he wouldn't get nearly as close to that uniqueness and recognisability without it, considering that Radovid's surcoat looks practically identical to his if you matched the colours.

One thing I will mention, though, is that for Roche, wearing a chaperon could help him blend in in crowds, since they are currently fashionable and many people wear them in the games. Hair is something that does so, so much to make people easily recognisable, and wearing a chaperon can help with not being identified as quickly. And yes, the chaperon also identifies him, and people might look for it when looking for him, but the good thing? It's very easy to take off a hat.

Tl;dr chaperons used to be hoods, but by rolling up the face hole and putting it on upside down, medieval people carried them on their heads when it got warm. They then evolved into fashion pieces, and for the sake of unique designs in video games, suspending your disbelief is sometimes required.

(Also anon there are a lot of let's plays with or without commentary on youtube, and i highly recommend watching them)

i have a question for you, since you appear to be in the midst of a roche hyperfixation and i have a flavor of brain weirdness that makes me Bad At Viddy Games so i will sadly never play the witcher

whycome his hat look like that

help me finley i want to understand

it’s called a chaperon, and it was commonly worn in Western Europe in the Middle Ages! It was originally a hood but eventually evolved into more of a generic head-wrap, and there are several different ways to wear them according to artistic depictions. Here’s the wikipedia page if you want to learn more about them!

@sebdoeswords might know more about them and specifically the significance of Roche’s. I would assume they’re useful in keeping sunlight out of one’s eyes, but seeing as Roche is a warrior, the apparent limited visibility would probably be a hinderance so I’m not actually sure. Respect to the designers though, because hats and headwear are severely underutilized character design aspects!

[bibiana112]

Not that I can control it as evidenced by me expecting to get into twewy for the second half of the year, but man it was a good time for me to hyperfixate on zero escape again

[everythingispirates]

watching a video essay abt misinformation rn and it's making me think many thoughts so like. sorry in advance but I'm gonna have to do some serious talk now, if very rambly.

the whole gay pirate divorce thing is like. it's funny I've very much settled on it being funny but it has also really opened my eyes to how misinformation spreads online. like believe it or not a lot of this was very carefully planned. I had ppl peer review the screenshots, I made sure to post it when I knew ppl were gonna be online and I recruited a bunch of friends outside the potc fandom to spread the post once it was done bc I knew it wasn't going to convince anyone within this blog's "circle". and the whole thing to begin with was very much like. shameless opportunism with ofmd trending like it did, I like to think I've made that clear. I was definitely shocked at how much traction it got which was why I freaked out a bit, but it was also in one way the exact reaction I had planned on, just on a larger scale.

and like a lot of people have gotten kinda pissy when I say they should have been wary of there not being sources and I do get that but also like it's definitely something to keep in mind for the future if you got tricked by the post. like, what ppl will say is that oh it's just a disney movie it's no big deal and that's def true but at the same time it's worth reflecting on which claims we consider worthy of fact checking you know? like if something feels like it should be true, or if it's something we want to believe in or just something we don't care enough abt to question like in this case we're def more likely to just take it at face value and pass it along. and in this particular case the debunked version of the post is definitely the most popular which is kind of a relief, but like it's common knowledge that debunkings or retractions of viral misinfo rarely get as much traction as the original claims.

the thing about me is like. I'm not particularly clever or anything. this wasn't a difficult scheme to pull off, all I needed to do was keep an eye on what tumblr was into right now, remember what they'd been into in the past and do some light photoshopping. like, the whole thing was very much designed for tumblr and it was honestly kind of fascinating watching tumblr take the bait so hard. and the thing is I might have fallen for something similar for the reasons I've already listed! like that whole dinosaur king post that showed up after mine is definitely something I might have read in passing and not questioned, I'm not writing all this to point the finger at people. I'm just trying to remind you how like. incredibly easy it is to get this stuff out there. like all you need is to know the platform you're on and its userbase decently well and have some creativity, then boom you're absolutely set. like not to rattle my own bones but need I remind you that pirates of the caribbean trended, if only for a short while? and once again that was after the post had been epically debunked but at that point it doesn't really matter anymore. if I were, say, paid by disney to do this for some reason which like for the record I was absolutely not, it wouldn't matter to them that the post got debunked bc people would still be talking about potc and thinking about potc and maybe even rewatching potc like do you get what I'm getting at here? when misinfo goes gigaviral it's gonna get whatever it's about a lot of attention, even when the original claim has been proven false.

anyway my point here is like idk trust no one I guess? or at least like. the next time you see a post that sounds reasonable but has no sources remember the time I out of all people managed to trick a good chunk of the tumblr crows into rewatching pirates of the caribbean

[girlfriendsofthegalaxy]

tuesday again 4/5/22

work is a slog, weather is bad, life is a fuck. let’s talk about some media

listening Simply Vibing to this, which according to google translate is Prayer by the band Kassiopeâ. it has a little bit of the vibe of Blondie’s Call Me? it sounds like a modern cover of an eighties song but it’s already a modern song. hope this helps. VERY strobe-y music vid, be forewarned.

the lyrics are very fairytale-impossible, like again idk if this is an accurate translation of part of the lyrics but fuck it’s good

Give me the grace of a cheetah Myocardial elasticity Perfection of all kinds To fall in love with your enemies! Perhaps this is impossible!

i want to know more about this band and what specific old movies they are pulling from and why they reference Mephistopheles and why there are so many animal parts in this song and what it’s About but alas. 

how did i find this: either spotify weekly recommended or it started playing an automix after i listened to a single and i didn’t notice.

reading do you people enjoy when i link a Bideo James article and break it down/add my own commentary or is that not fun? can’t tell, haven’t read a real book in a minute.

anyway there are exactly two other video games data pundits whose work in data i respect and mr joost van dreunen is one of them. here’s an interesting look at the playstation subscription service offering, which does feel half-baked and like they didn’t want to announce it quite yet. the tiers are extremely confusing- i tried to summarize them in one powerpoint slide for a client and ended up with a footnote on the main slide instead like “varied tiers of offerings similar to GamePass”.

now the fun thing about console gaming is that consoles are typically sold at something of a loss. the real money is in the games, especially the first-party exclusives (the ones you can Only play on a specific platform, like Breath of the Wild, bc once you’ve gotten people over the big purchase of a console they’re more likely to buy more games for it). the real money is also now in the subscription services. everyone wants to be the Netflix of Games.

playstation’s offering isn’t QUITE like gamepass, even though they feel similar. as mr joost points out, right now the games available on playstation’s service tend to NOT be the most modern battlepass lootbox stuff that keeps gambling addictions satisfied (my words not his). since they ARE offering a nice buffet of older PS2 and PS3 games, this implies good things for video game preservation, and i think if they spun it more as a Criterion Collection of restored/remastered/pulled out of the archives stuff they might get a little more traction? who could say. much remains to be seen &tc

how did i find this? read it for work.

watching our flag means death: not pinging my Sea Longing in the way black sails does bc it is so obvious they are not on a real boat? like i am thinking of it more as a stage play than anything else? i am oddly cranky that it’s not black sails, but nothing will ever be black sails. this was perfectly fine and fun! tailored in a very specific way for fandom in a way i cannot articulate, in the way that some movies are oscar bait this show was fandom bait? but not in a malicious way, i think mr waititi simply knows what he’s about?

playing deeply annoyed bc i was very excited for NORCO, a moody narrative point and click game in the louisiana lowlands, but the themes have turned out to be. shall we say. Emotionally Difficult for me. so i did a thing i hate which is request a refund, but made it super clear in the refund note that the problem was me and not the game. shoutout to games that DO put their biggest trigger upfront with a warning, wish they did it for more than just the one tho.

in other news i have GOT to find a new fucking game to turn my brain off that’s not fallout 4, bc i put like a hundred hours into this run with the objective of getting more achievements and have fallen off at the same point i did last time (rummaged around in a brain, didn’t meet the brotherhood bc fuck those guys) and i am simply not compelled by the main quest and i am no longer having fun with the game. i am finding it oddly difficult to make my own fun in that game this time around, outside of settlement building.

anyway look at this screenshot from the most extreme southwestern corner of the map, where you can very very faintly make out the brotherhood airship in the distance. should have centered it but i did not, a bit up and to the left of the center dot.

and this slightly better shot. i do like watching the vertibirds limp home. dont you fucking DARE crash into my goddamn base tho

spent most of this run unlocking all the settlements and spent like fifty hours in nuka cola world, which is an extremely robust little dlc. maybe i’ll give far harbor a crack tonight, although i vaguely remember actually finishing that one. still haven’t finished nuka cola world bc i do like gage but it’s mmmm impossible for me to justify doing a slaver/raider playthrough. why (i mean i know why but WHY) are the east coast games so obsessed with owning slaves. it’s not great. the biggest and most robust questline aside from the main in fo3 is the goddamn slave trader one. you functionally own clover and charon.

making part of a making update, part of a life update: i will be moving sometime between NOW and END OF JUNE (upside down smiley face) partly bc i have learned that i simply cannot deal with living with other people any longer and especially with cannot deal with living with other people five years younger than me. i do not currently actively wish my worst roommate harm but that could change at any moment.

so making will probably DRAMATICALLY slow down bc i am no longer inclined to put any effort into this apartment. the making this week is i guess pre-grieving this apartment. a good refuge while i had it :(

evil lair 2.0 here we come?

[goofygargoyle]

I don't understand the cruelty of doctors

Dr Roo was the most sane in his reaction: basically "my hands are tied, without something in the imaging I can't justify doing any surgery". Neutral, unemotional, straight to the point.

But all the other neurosurgeons lost their fucking minds

Bolo, had written me off in our first video call. But he did the invasive cervical traction at my request. As we went in to the OR I told him that this was going to be negative, that because it pulls up from the sides of my skull and doesn't push up the back of my skull it wouldn't work, it wasn't my neck but my occipital plate. He ignored me. After the test, with the heavy fucking crane pincers still in my head, I tried to tell him again.

He lost his mind. He purposefully spoke over me, repeating himself in a childish schoolyard bully way, not allowing me to explain. He insisted I had "occipital neuralgia" which is... like the opposite of what I have. He refused to listen or care for me.

Since then I've begged other neurosurgeons.

I even ended up at one doctor who wasn't a surgeon but I was told he was a crucial step toward getting surgery.

This guy also lost his mind at me. He flipped between "that's impossible what you've experienced" and "this isn't my expertise so idk". like in the same sentence. And yelled at me for even seeing him, like his receptionist hadn't been the one who said I had to.

I also got some condescending bastard who kept trying to give me the most bullshit metaphor to justify his not doing shit. And then insisted I contact 2 random experts. Then ghosted me when I explained that random doctors were not legally able to give me medical advice and I needed /him/ to contact them.

This week I had another neurosurgeon and his... Idk... berate me. They yelled at me not just for wanting surgery but also they were absolutely pissed that my legs had stopped working and I needed to be wheeled out of the building. the doctor was like "you walked in here" and I'm like "do you not understand that I pushed my broken body too hard to get here and now I'm in too much pain to stand?"

Like I at least understand "my hands are tied, I'll get super sued if I do surgery without something on the imaging." I fucking hate it because there is no more imaging I can get. But I understand.

But flipping their shit and yelling at me, ignoring the evidence, telling me nobody will ever do the surgery and if someone says they will they're a swindler and a butcher, like, what the fuck. Just say you don't want to risk your ass to save my life and move on.

[futuregws]

Idk if someone said something of the kind before but I was just wondering that if that restaurant vid was really taken days ago before these pap pics and it wasn't talked about , maybe that's why they decided to go for a kiss?? Cause like you said the "mystery" of their relationship during the other 2 movies got old (and quite boring tbh)and wouldn't attract much attention this time around. So if they not just trolling us, for a pr thingy to work better it has to be w something new to really gain traction.

The whole restaurant thing still messes with my head bc of dates and all but according to what one anon they told me they saw the video on Tuesday so the day that it came out, and the video is innocent they look like two friends hanging out, but literally no one talked about it at all and even now people are not talking about it that much I feel like, so I could totally see this as them noticing that fans basically didn't care and that it's time to actually do something to get the attention of the media and everyone else, and the kiss is what they decided and it worked