#idk if this hits right or not but it's been so long since I drew a proper comic I felt very out of my element

[keydekyie]

tfw you upset your giant monster friend and he accidentally triggers your fight or flight response

▶───◆──◈──◇──◈──◆───◀

a portion of a scene in chapter 17 of The Crossing

[writingoddess1125]

Just a Peak- 👀

Crack-Head Headcanon

You accidently see the guys naked

Spicy Themes 🔥 including oral 18+

Buggy, Mihawk, Crocodile, Shanks,

Support me on Ko-Fi! I'm very poor and this is my job for now

Also a quick side note for everyone, This took forever since I had to do actual math! I looked at ALL of these damn characters and their height then based off of Odas fucking drawings figure out how their anatomy would lay in how he drew pants. Was it excessive- Absolutely 💯 was it worth it IDK

Buggy

• You all had been drinking on the ship, it was a fun party in all honesty. Buggy of course wanting to be flashing and show off how fun he was. Buggy who was fairly well drunk stumbled out for some reason you didnt hear-

• You stumbled out to potentially puke over the rails, However when you did you saw your Captian standing there clearly having finished relieving himself and now simply too drunk to put himself away as he stared out over the open ocean.

• You now knew why Buggy was so damn confident all the time...

• Thicccc, easy 8 inches flaccid and fit so well in his gloved hands it damn near looked picturesque.

• Have you ever seen a pretty cock!? When are cock pretty!? It's literally a perfect shape and color, with nicely trimmed ocean blue curls at the base.

Mihawk

• "AHH!! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE!?" Buggy screamed as he caught you staring- His face as red as his nose as he quickly tried to tuck himself away with sloppy hands.

• You quickly doing a U-Turn back into the hull of the ship- Face as red as a cherry and the image now seared into your brain.

Crocodile

• Being acquainted with Mihawk definitely had its benefits, in case really good drinks and the Bartender giving you free drinks cause they were hitting on The famous pirate!

• Mihawk had disapeared around 4 drinks ago, so you walled out of the bar to see if you could spot him. Turning the corner you spot him, but he definitely wasn't alone.

• There he was with thay flirty Bartender, her on her knees sucking him off. He looked mildly bored as well as he glanced down at her- However you couldn't help but stare when you saw her pull back for air.

• Long a solid 9+ inches , A bit thin for what you expected but clearly he made up for it in length. Pale, Slender, curved ever so slightly and thick hair at the base.

• You now understood the wide walk-

• Seeing the young female Bartender taking him fully into her mouth once mkre with a deep blush. Her nose pressed against the thick layer of black hair at the base- You see his eyes go up from the Bartender right to you

• His eyes met yours and he smirked- Like he was amused you had caught him this way, or that he was turned on by this possibly.

• Your face burned as he stared such strong eye contact with you. Quickly you snapped from your thoughts and hurried back into the bar. Finishing your drink quietly as the memory played in your mind.

• When Mihawk returned he sat next to you, not saying a work but you felt his eyes following you.

• Being a secretary was hard- being one for a famed dangerous pirate was harder- and then there was Crocodile

• He was a very picky and meticulous man that you knew better then to displease. So you had gotten his clothes from the cleaner (sands a bitch to wash out) and was dropping them off at his current residence. You had a key anyway so you walked right in, not expecting him there anyway.

• You were dead wrong however- Walking in it seemed Crocodile had just left the shower and didn't bother with a towel either. Stepping out steaming and having water running down his form.

• He was a big man (8ft3in -253 cm) you knew that... however you never connected it how that would translate in terms of.. his other anatomy however this just didn't seem fair!

Shanks

• It was easy 11 inches, the size of some people's forearm! Paired with it being very girthy it looked more like a weapon then an organ

• Paired with the lazy mess of wavy black curls at the base he clearly didn't bother taming.

• His eyes locking on your shocked face and how red you looked. A noise similar to that of a chuckle leaving him as he didn't even bother closing his robe.

• "Come here-" He said, taking a drag from his cigar and waving you to come back in... it seemed you would have a much closer look now-

• It had been a eventful day- A successful treasure hunt were the whole crew had pulled in a few billion berries for their own pocket. So you had all celebrated, Getting far too drunk in a short amount of time- Paired with delicious food.

• You still feeling buzzed you decided to drift off to get some rest before you got totally shitfaced

• Walking into one of the near by rooms to get some rest, the alcohol still making you fuzzy you realized far too late you'd stepped into the Captian's Quarters- and Far far too late into noticing their was your Captian half undressed clearly about to retire himself.

• A lovely white and pink member laying at a easy 8 in flacid and a forest of untamable red curls are the base of his cock that just lead your eyes there and only to there.

• He blinked at you surprised before cracking one of his signature smiles-

• "You okay Darling?" He said with a laugh, seeing your face so red and shocked.

• A twinkle in his eyes as he gestured for you to come fully inside.

• "Seems something has caught your eye, why don't we close up that door and talk about it?~" He said with a smirk. You nodding and closing the door behind you with a shy smile.

• Now how could you refuse that?

[dinoace2]

I had a cute little story idea so you all must deal with my sappy ass

This one's just some sweet short astarion comfort fluff bc I need more of that in my life

(AFaB Tav, referred to as She/Her, mention of periods. 575 words)

~~~~~

They were more or less together at this point, mutual pining and spending all their time with one another, though neither said it aloud. Tav let him feed on her neck whenever he needed, though he would only do so if she offered first. This was rarely an issue, however, since she had a tendency to make this offer on a daily basis.

Lately, though, she hadn't. For the last several days, whenever the party retreated to their camp for some much-needed rest, Tav would immediately go straight to her tent and lay down.

Astarion paced outside of her tent, wondering whether or not to ask about it. Was she upset with him? Did he do something wrong? Was she finally fed up with him? No, no, that couldn't be it. Right?

After fighting with himself for a while, he slowly poked his head in, seeing Tav curled up around a pillow, her back to him. "Hello, darling...I just wanted to check in on you. Is everything alright?"

She paused, a low grumble in her throat. "...yeah. just been...I dunno...a bit extra tired. I'm okay."

That didn't sound okay. Tav was usually so strong, so energetic...this definitely wasn't normal.

He cleared his throat. "...does this, perhaps...have anything to do with my, ah...lack of feeding these last few days?" He paused, then shook his head quickly. "I-i would like to be clear, I'm not asking for it at the moment! I was simply...inquiring. Trying to gain an understanding, that's all." He chuckled. "Youre the one who always insists upon honesty and 'no more secrets', after all."

Tav paused then let out a long sigh, sitting up and giving the poor, strangled pillow a break. "...Sorry. I....its really rather silly...perhaps almost selfish..." she turned around, looking up at him from where she sat. "As much as I'd love to share right now, I've been losing enough blood as it is...im not sure it'd end well if I were to give up more."

Losing blood? His face paled, somehow more than usual. Was she injured? She didn't look hurt. He ransacked his memory to try and figure out when or where she could have taken such a hit, all the while looking her up and down for any physical signs of pain.

"I...oh dear...uh...if I may ask, what happened, darling? When did you get hurt? Did you fall? Did someone stab you? Who do I need to hunt down?"

Tav was quiet for a moment then let out a soft chuckle. "Im fine, Astarion...really, it's okay."

She...wasn't hurt? Then why was she...

...Oh.

Oh.

His cheeks flushed as bright as his eyes and he was quick to her side, pulling her into his arms. "Darling, why didn't you say so? I absolutely would have understood. You didn't have to hide that from me." He chuckled. "If anyone here knew a thing or two about blood, it would be me, don't you think?"

His comment drew a giggle from the tired warrior in his arms, and she snuggled up. "Thank you, Astarion."

The following days, the rest of the party noticed that Astarion was especially doting on Tav, (or at least more than usual,) being extra snuggly and, in some particular occasions, downright spoiling her. Despite her insistence that it wasn't a big deal, and he really didn't have to go so far, he was incredibly stubborn to ensure that his darling was as comfortable and happy as possible.

~~~~

Idk how to end it so

Thanks for reading! :]

[factual-fantasy]

First...

HOWS TUNA BEEN DOING? AND ELLIE? AND LOUIS? WAAAAAAH THEYRE SO PRECIOUS TO MEEEEEEE

Second...

OUUUUUUUUGH I LOVE ELLIE SO MUUUUUUCHHHHH

I think I misunderstood her a bit there. She isn't the best with body language, and has bitch resting face. People would be "I think the doesn't like me at all", only to realize after getting to know her a bit that she does, in fact, like you, she just express it differently. She cooks fou you your favorite meal when your down, if you need to be alone but not alone she offers her kitchen as a safe place, when you shove a flower to your mouth she looks at you wondering "why didn't you asked for a snack if you were this hungry?". She's a lovely cookie and I love her so much. She's just... hard to read, that's all. I wonder if there's someone at the crew that has the ability of traducting her body language to the others, like when she just stares at your soul with empty eyes, that person would say: "she thinks your fighting technique is neat :D" and she'll nod like "yes, that".

Third...

I NEED to know WHAT HAPPENED HERE

I know you probably drew it to show Cuttlefish cool ability, but

HE LOOKS SO SCARED WHAT HAPPENED THERE

I know he doesn't trust Cuttlefish that much, and maybe seeing her make herself gigantic didn't help him to trust her more, at least in the moment. Probably he's seeing her do that for the first time and that's why he so scared. "I didn't knew she could do that, is she hiding more to us? What if she's hiding worse things?" Would Tuna think those things? That's if his neurons manage to make the thought of course.

But thats not what this is about, what the hell happened to Spidercrab?! He looks out of combat, Cuttlefish is protecting him like this because this is an extreme situation, and Tuna just... he isn't looking at Spidercrab to see the wounds, he's looking at her with something in between of confusion and fear (be it because of her or because of Spidercrab or both). I think is a nice detail that the "what the hell Cuttlefish" is stronger than the "Spidercrab are you OK or are you dead?" In his mind, at least for the seconds this image lasts, he probably dismiss it shortly and actually atends to their unconscious medic.

Spidercrab looks like he took a bad hit or a particularly bad injury, and looks that he's been face on the floor since. Tuna has just arrived at his side, kneeled and the something huge appears at his side. He freezes and looks, only to see a... gigantic... Cuttlefish... somehow... his tiny Algae brain isn't understanding. He doesn't understands it, so he fears it because what else would he do? Oh! He has better things to do! She'll take care of that cookie, he should take care of Spidercrab and get him so safety if he can be moved! It's too dangerous!

Maybe this image takes place after he's cheked if Spidercrab is alive and breathing and he gives himself this moment of contemplating in fear whatever this secretive cremated is doing.

Idk, I love this little things you probably didn't think of much while doing <3

AND FINALLY

How's the relationship between Pinwheel and Tuna? They're both troubled youths from what you've said, right? Do they come from the same place? Do they bond or they're rivals on who has the less braicells (Tuna does, no doubt)?

And... that's it for now, I LOOOOVE your characters and WILL ask about them everytime I can ;] <3

XDD It's good to read from you again! Louis, Tuna and Ellie are all doing great I'm sure! As for your comment/questions..

Yeah, Ellie is just a bit stone faced. That's all! But I imagine that most of the crew is able to read her to some extent. But out of all the crew, I imagine that Seafoam and Octo are the very best at reading her. Mostly because they've known her for so long. But also because Seafoam is good at reading Octo! Who is pretty stone faced himself.. and Octo can read Ellie because he has lot of the same body language as her! XDD

As for the Cuttlefish drawing, you're right about it being just a random scenario to show off Cuttle's power. But while I'm thinking about it..

I imagine that the crew must have been on an island of somekind. Since it's rare that any of the crew gets hurt like that when they're all together on the ship..

Maybe they were looking for treasure? Or supplies? Who knows.. but I know most of the crew got separated, and attacked by... Some cookies.? <XD

The point in the end though, is Spidercrab isn't really a fighter. So when faced with an opponent, he got taken down.. probaaably by getting hit in the chest or gut-

Cuttlefish wouldn't usually use this ability, as it goes against her preferred fighting style.. so she must have felt backed into a corner. With her friend down, and her cover already blown. She just panicked and used it as a last resort.

I think you're right about Tuna. He's already pretty sceptical about Cuttlefish, so having her suddenly whip out this ability he didn't know she had would be something for sure.. though I think this would oddly build more trust with her.

I pictured her defeating this baddie and then shrinking back down. She turns and has a genuine look of worry and stress on her face, rushing over to check on Tuna and Spidercrab. The fact that she has such a power but has never used it to fight back against the crew or intimidate anyone.. it kinda gives him a different view of Cuttlefish. But then again, hidden ability, what else is she capable of? Sus?? It's a double sided coin- <XDD

Lastly, Tuna and Pinwheel! I picture them coming from similar places but turning out to be very different people.

I think of Tuna as coming from a bad place where he was hurt but other people. Which caused him to be very resistant to authority and just people in general. Though he is slowly able to take his walls down and feel comfortable around the crew.

Pinwheel however came from a place where she was greatly traumatized, but it wasn't because of one person or people. More like a sunken ship disaster or a tsunami situation. Something where she longed for the comfort and guidance of other people.

And that's exactly what she found with Seafoam and his crew. She soaked up their generosity and kindness like a sponge. She especially found comfort in Seafoam's gentle personality. She quickly grew past her trauma and now is almost as jolly and energetic as Louis!

When it comes to them interacting..? Hmm.. I can see Tuna being a real jerk and making it hard for Pinwheel to really get to know who he truly is.. whenever Pinwheel tried to have fun or goof around, Tuna would always resist it. They probably didn't interact much at first..

..Now as time went on and Tuna lightened up? I'm sure they grew much closer. Pinwheel and Tuna actually have similar energy and like a lot of the same things. I can see Pinwheel and him getting into trouble, talking about life and pigging out on Ellie's cooking together. They'd be best friends! :}}}

Anyways, thank you again for the interest in my critters and for the ask! They're always so fun to read! :}} ✨💞✨

[celaenaeiln]

Okay, so I've been scouring your blog these past few days, and ughh, it feels so good to find someone who actually seems to understand who Dick is! His eldest daughter complex is something I relate to so much, and was the thing that really drew me in. A lot of people look at the mediation and emotional weight lifting, (and those are huge parts of it, don't get me wrong,) but something else I find very eldest child is the way his own relationship with Bruce has continued to take hits all so Bruce can have better relationships with the others. Like when you're the oldest your parents make so many more mistakes with you. I also can't help but feel like it's got to be so hard as Dick to look at the way Bruce is with Tim/Dami/Cass, and wish that he could have that kind of relationship with his Dad. They want to be jealous of the trust, think he's the golden child, and yet at the same time, he's wishing he had something more resembling the true parent/child relationship the others got. (Idk maybe I'm projecting, but oh lord I go absolutely feral for eldest daughter Dick, it just hurts so good)

og post in reference

Yes! I'm so glad you brought that up!!

In terms of parenting, and why I don't really write about Bruce being a parent to Dick, is because Dick is kinda a guinea pig, as my engineering teacher put it once.

He was the Bruce's first for everything. First friend, first partner, first son - he just took responsibility for all roles. It makes things even worse because Bruce at the time he took in Dick, he had only been Batman for three years. Three. And he was literally drowning under the weight of the mask until he found Dick. There's a reason why Dick is Bruce's is right hand man and that's because Dick's been with him through everything. When Bruce was struggling and almost giving into his obsession, Dick was there to pull him out of it.

He quite literally mothered Bruce through his feelings, asking if everything was okay, what's wrong, watching him constantly and guaging his mood. This is exhausting work because Dick's mind was always on Bruce's mental state, much like a mother worried constantly about her teenage daughter or a father about his son.

That adoption scene where Dick asks Bruce, "why didn't you adopt me?" That's the realization of eldest daughter syndrome brought up.

Up until then, Dick was completely fine with being the caretaker for Bruce and lifting him up. He parented Bruce for so long and so smoothly, neither fully realized how much Dick was doing for him until he left. When Bruce adopts Jason, that's when Dick realizes there's something wrong with their dynamic.

I don't know if at that time Dick really wanted to be adopted or if he felt neglected because that he's wasn't while another was. But one thing he feels isn't jealousy, he's very clear on that, but Dick feels hurt.

Was there something he did wrong that caused Bruce to do that? What he do differently? What could he have done better? These types of questions constantly cloud his brain because he's gotten so used to taken care of his guardian for two decades now that he must feel hurt on some level even if he never expresses. He wouldn't begrudge his siblings because he feels happy Bruce isn't making the same mistakes to them that he did with Dick but at the same time, it's just exhausting for him.

Bruce might have improved but he isn't the best, so now he's busy taking care of both his brothers and sisters and his father. He also has to take care of his friends too.

He has the weight of the world on his shoulders but the worst part for him isn't the actual the weight - it's the realization that he's holding the weight. Because before he could live on in ignorance and bliss that Bruce was always going to be this way, and taking care of him would naturally just be Dick's job. He's so used to it, he's been doing it since he was eight.

But now, he knows what he's doing, he knows he's not supposed to, but he must. Because they rely on him, but also because that's what Bruce made him into. And I think that hurts the most for him.

He'll feel conflicted about it because on one hand, he loves Bruce. He loves him so much, he'll do anything for him. But also what about all those missed opportunities? Could he have been something different? Maybe he could've hung out with the Titans more if he didn't have to deal with bruce constantly demanding his presence. Maybe he could've joined a new class he never thought he would try.

Dick doesn't regret what he did and if he could go back in time, he would do it all over again but...he probably feels melancholic again. To love a parent so much you sacrifice your happiness over and over again so they can be happy while you're forced to grow up early. Dick's personality itself just lends itself to helping others but constantly taking care of your parent?

He's happy but he feels helpless and sad so he stays silent about it all.

It's said that Eldest Daughter Syndrome can make women feel overburdened, stressed out, and constantly responsible for others.

More signs include having a strong sense of responsibility (leading the batfam and hero teams), feeling a need for control (him fighting for his independence against Bruce and fighting to take care of his own teams), carrying the heavy weight of parents' expectations (his entire monologue in Nightwing 1996 about his feelings towards Bruce), perfectionism (Roy grouching about Dick's perfectionist tendencies to Kori in Outsiders and Roy yelling at Batman for it in Batman Plus), struggling with same-age relationships (dating older), and feeling resentment towards family (his outsiders era was him just resenting Bruce in the beginning).

He's been parenting Bruce for so long he was forced to grow up prematurely. I mentioned in my compartmentalization post when Dick's parents have literally just died. And he's forcing himself to act happy because he doesn't want Bruce to feel guilty and upset about not catching their murderer yet. That's not a responsibility a child should have - pretending everything is fine so as not to worry their family. That's the role of a parent. He's taking parenting his own parent because his actual one is incapable of doing so.

But Bruce's greatest fear is that by taking in Dick, he deprived Dick of opportunities to shine. To live in the limelight. And Dick knows everything about Bruce, so he knows Bruce's worst fears. And for this reason, out of the love that he has in his heart, Dick will never tell Bruce if he's hurt him because this is directly connected to his worst fear.

And that hurts. Because vocally releasing anger and sorrow is cathartic but to have it build up silently inside and letting it sink beneath the waves each time is painful.

[e-pluribus-unum-e]

Haunted (1/?)

A/N#1: This is a Mattheo Riddle x OC fanfic, I did this just because I struggle with writing "Y/N" over and over again. I feel like an actual name for the reader helps you connect better, and I already struggle with being a personable writer. Please forgive me. The OC is named Veralynn Post, she goes by Vera. Idk her middle name yet so don't ask. She has long curly blonde hair, it reaches to her mid to lower back, it's also very poofy (think Hermione Granger). She has amber eyes, almost like whiskey and honey. She's 5'2 and a Hufflepuff. And she's from the US of A 🗽. It probably doesn't make sense why she's in a wizarding school in England but bare with me. Also I'll probably have smut in this at some point but that won't be until they're well into their 7th year.

Warnings: Angst, Fluff, Mattheo 🥵, my terrible writing, eventual smut but not until much later in the series

Pairing: Mattheo Riddle x Fem!OC

Summary: Vera's best friend finds herself in a whirlwind romance with none other than Theodore Nott. Vera reflects on her own love, how ever unrequited it is, and wonders when she'll finally confess to the man that holds her heart in his hands. 6.0k+ words

A/N#2: Dear Reader, Hello! This is the start of my very first attempt at a series LOL. I've written for my own enjoyment for years, but never on a blog or anything even similar to Tumblr. Last night at 2 AM I was hit with inspiration after hearing a series of songs play one after the other that reminded me so much of our baby boy Matty <3. So I have a timeline worked out and a list of songs I want to incorporate, one song per chapter, but that list is constantly changing because I'm trying to find the best ones possible to make this work. Also I'm starting them off in 6th year because yes, while they are minors, I need the time afforded to me by starting them off that young. No smut, NO SMUT, will happen before they're both well established 18 year olds in year 7. Please let me know how I can improve with my writing, it means a lot. It is my absolute pleasure to present you with the very first chapter in my Haunted series, When Emma Falls in Love. ---Sincerely, Me

When Emma Falls in Love

When Emma falls in love, she paces the floor Closes the blinds and locks the door When Emma falls in love, she calls up her mom Jokes about the ways that this one could go wrong She waits and takes her time 'Cause Little Miss Sunshine always thinks it's gonna rain When Emma falls in love, I know That boy will never be the same

Emma Hemlock is my best friend. I met her at Platform 9¾ on our first day at Hogwarts, and ever since then, we've been joined at the hip. With her dazzling blue eyes and her straight brown hair, her tan complexion, and her warm smile, she drew the boys' attention immediately. They would scramble to write her love letters, asking her on dates and whether or not she'd give them a chance. And she never said yes. Until, now.

Theodore Nott had been asking her out since 3rd year, always being met with a resounding "NO." He even asked me for advice!-- "C'mon Veralynn! What's her favorite flowers? Does she like butter beer? When does she-" "PISS OFF THEO"-- (spoiler alert: we didn't get along). But it seems he finally 'wore her down.'

That's such a terrible expression. At least, that's what Emma says. She explained that 'no, he didn't wear me down, I just finally had the courage to say yes.' Or something like that. In all honesty, her hesitation to say yes in the first place made sense. Theo had gained the reputation of a ladies' man, him and the rest of his crew. Draco Malfoy, Lorenzo Montague, Blaise Zabini, Pansy Parkinson, and Mattheo Riddle.

Mattheo.

A man who could simultaneously get my heart racing out of fear and attraction. Fear of him, fear of the attraction, attraction because of the fear, however, you want to put it I don't care. But we'll get back to him later. Right now, it's all about Emma and her love life.

Emma finally said yes to Theo's persistent nagging, making him quite literally the happiest man in all of Hogwarts. No seriously, he ran into the Great Hall shouting "SHE SAID YES! WE'RE GETTING MARRI- OW, DAMN IT VERA!" (I may have thrown a dinner plate at his head).

So here I am. Waiting, sitting on the couch in our dorm, my arms wrapped around a pillow as I sat on my legs, watching the door in anticipation. They started dating in the summer. Emma's family had decided to spend their two months break on vacation in Italy. They ran into the Nott's while they were there. I have a theory that Theo caught wind of where the Hemlock family would be that June, and he begged his parents to let him go spend the summer in their family villa.

All that being said, they had had a whirlwind romance that didn't end when the warmer months came to a close. It's only the second week of our 6th year and they've gone on a total of four dates. It's almost hilarious how utterly whipped Theo is for her. That boy will never be the same.

Creeeeak. The door was pushed open—interrupting my thoughts—and Emma slipped into the room. She locked the door behind herself, her face looking... oh that's weird. She paced across the floor, closing the blinds, effectively putting an end to the bright sun I was basking in. I had expected her to come in, huffing and annoyed with the latest story on Theo's escapades. But this time, no, this time was different. Her eyes held a different story. "Vera..." Her grip on the window loosened as she turned towards me. Her lip trembling, and her eyes squinting. Suddenly her face split into the widest grin she's ever given me. "Vera-" "I know." We smiled at each other, one sincere and one feigned.

"I need- I need to send an owl to my parents. I need to ask my mom- oh shit this has never happened to me before. Vera, what do I do? What is this?" She started rambling, all the while her smile remained and she ran over to her desk. She pulled out her stationary and began her letter to her mother. "Ughhh I shouldn't even be writing to her about this, it's going to end in disaster anyway!"

What made me chuckle was the way she said it. The words were foreboding, but her smile never slipped. She didn't really expect this to end in a 'disaster.' "Write your letter, Em. Tell your Momma you're falling in love." I encourage softly from where I remain seated, nuzzling my face further into the pillow between my arms. Emma nods at me, eyes crinkling yet again as she leans back over her letter.

Okay, sure, maybe I don't sound as excited as I should for my closest friend. That's not the case, I am excited for her! But now's the time when we finally get to talk about Mattheo.

Chocolate eyes, curls the color of rich dark dirt, dimples when he smiles, and the scent of cigarettes and rain that clings to him no matter where he's been. To be frank, the man is liquid fire. And everyone else in Hogwarts noticed that too. And he took advantage of that fact. He had a new girl on his arm almost every day, never coming up empty in the 'love department.' But it was never love. Everyone understood he was never and would never be interested in anything serious. The problem with this?

Well that requires a bit of explanation.

I met him the same day I met Emma. Before her, even. I had gotten lost in the muggle train station trying to find the right platform, getting bumped into by grown strangers who didn't seem to notice the lost little girl tripping under their feet. I was born and raised in America until being invited to Hogwarts, and unfortunately, my parents couldn't afford to come with me to this wild train station. So I was all alone, trying desperately to find my way to Platform 9¾.

~flashback to that day~

I huff, dragging my luggage behind me as I try my best to push through the crowd. I couldn't see many children, which gave me my first clue that I wasn't in the right place. It was mostly muggle adults going to and fro, not glancing down to notice the small poofy-haired kid all alone. My thoughts were interrupted as someone slammed into me, "OW" I cried as the luggage slipped from my fingers. It hit the pavement floor below my feet, buckles popping open as the contents spill out. I shake my head in disbelief, looking up to see who knocked into me. All I saw was the back of a grown man walking away from me, seemingly the culprit, and also seemingly ignoring the fact that he just ruined an 11-year-old's day. "Hey wanker, watch where you're going!" I jump, startled at the grumbling voice ringing in my ear.

That wasn't my voice. No, that was behind me. Turning around, I gaze upon—for the very first time—the boy who would turn my whole world upside down. He was wearing jeans, and an almost too-big-for-him flannel, his curls falling effortlessly over his forehead as he glared past me at the man who just Kool-Aided into my back.

His eyes flickered from over my shoulder to my belongings on the ground. Wordlessly, he crouched down and started folding up the clothes and slipping them back into my suitcase. "Oh- no no that's okay you don't have to- I mean- agh this is such a mess." I scramble, trying to stop him from helping any further. 'This is so embarrassing.'

I squat down next to him, working side by side to get everything packed away. His hands stopped moving at the sound of my own voice, his head turning toward me as he took in my appearance for the first time. "You're American?" "Uh-" I blush, distracted by his pretty frown. "-yeah." I finally answer, a bit dazedly. "Cool." He responded. We just sat there, chocolate eyes looking into amber, until the distant sound of a train's horn broke us out of our trance. "Riddle. Mattheo Riddle. Where are you headed?" The boy asked, sticking his hand out for me to shake.

"Oh! I'm Veralynn Post, um, you can call me Vera. Everyone does." His eyebrow raised at that. "E-Everyone back in my- HEY!" I gasp as he starts laughing. "I was just teasing you Anna, no need to fret. But seriously where are you headed?" He tried to quiet his chuckling as he lifts my bag from the ground, carrying it along with his (and refusing to let me take it off his hands).

I took out the letter in my pocket, looking at the information it contained. "Platform 9¾." He seemed to ponder that for a minute. "I don't think that exists..." My eyes widen. How could I be so stupid? He's a normal not-wizardy-boy and here I am, spilling all of Hogwarts beans to the first person who would listen. Maybe if I play it off like I'm a dumb tourist he'll just forget all about it. Wait- is he laughing? OH THIS BOY- "Man it's easy to trick you. Lighten up, Vera."

My blush deepens, but not out of embarrassment. No, I was mad. "That's not funny Mattheo, I'm genuinely lost and alone and you're laughing at me." He seemed to soften at that, his laughter quieting down. "I'm not laughing at you, I'm laughing with you." "I'm not laughing." "Hmm... touché." The way he said it made me want to punch him in the face.

Mattheo seemed to notice the anger in my eyes as he straightened up. "All jokes aside, I'm headed there too. We can walk together?" He offered, looking at me apologetically. "...fine, but no more teasing." "That's too high a price." "Fine," another huff from me, "you can tease if you want to but at least make it obvious you're not being serious."

His grin grew. "You're funny, Vera."

~end of flashback~

I met Emma when we got onto the train, and ever since then, I've had an unrequited crush and a best friend. Emma was everything I could have asked for; a dear friend, a confidant, and a sister. And I will always remember that day in fondness for when I met her, but alongside the sweet memories of a friendship comes the tainted recollection of a lost love.

Mattheo and I have remained friendly up to this very moment, as I watch Emma fall in love with his best friend, Theodore. But after I was sorted into Hufflepuff and he into Slytherin, we went our separate ways. Never being close but always painfully aware whenever he walked into the room. In his defense, it's not like he ignored me or anything. We were amicable with one another, just not in each other's core friend group.

The sad truth is, is that girls tripped over themselves because the kind boy I met seven years ago grew into Adonis reincarnate. They notice him because he's effortlessly good-looking and always seems to get great grades, even when he's constantly skipping class to smoke or make out with some girl in the broom closet.

His chiseled abs, strong jawline, and generally Greek-god-like physique (thank you Quidditch) made him a heart throb.

However, the female population of Hogwarts treat him like a piece of meat. Even though they're aware that he’ll cast them aside after just one night of being in his embrace, not only being aware but wanting it because no one really wanted to love him. Him. I've had to watch as everyone acted as if he really was just a carnal beautiful body and not a soul.

Sure, his core friend group (Pansy, Theodore, Blaise, Enzo, and Draco) didn't care about his looks. From what I've observed, they genuinely care about him. But after years of almost the entirety of Hogwarts not caring, I've noticed how it's worn on him.

And it's not just Hogwarts and their obsessive drooling over him, it's his home life. His father in Azkaban, his mother dead, his brother ignoring his existence. He had an abusive childhood and the roughest of up bringings. The very same women who will beg him for one night in his bed, turn around to gossip about how he's the next Voldemort.

So very few people cared about him.

And I've noticed how it's worn on him.

I've noticed lots of things.

I've noticed how when he walks through the food line, he never takes the last of anything, always leaving it for the person behind him. How he hangs behind after dinner to pick up the plates and trays our fellow students were too lazy to clean up themselves. I've noticed that whenever a girl in our year comes into class with bruises on her body, her boyfriend is in the infirmary the next day and there are cuts on Mattheo's knuckles. How he slips treats to the magical creatures when everyone's too busy listening to Hagrid's lecture to even notice the exchange. Everyone is too busy to notice, except for me.

I've spent my entire Hogwarts career falling in love with a boy, who grew into a man, all while I remained unnoticed.

I hang on to every word I hear him mutter to Theo, to every nod he sends my way as he walks past, and the rare time he asks me for my notes after he misses class.

So here we are, back in my dorm, watching my best friend's love life blossom before my eyes. Yes, I'm happy for her. But yes, I'm also, admittedly and ashamedly, jealous.

'Cause she's the kind of book that you can't put down Like if Cleopatra grew up in a small town And all the bad boys would be good boys If they only had a chance to love her And to tell you the truth, sometimes I wish I was her

I tried to listen as Cedric droned on, talking excitedly about this new book or muggle movie or something. To be honest, I've missed about 90% of what he's said. I slept roughly two hours last night, staying up to be Emma's sounding board. 'She really has fallen hard for this guy.' I think to myself as I glance across the Great Hall. Theo was sitting at his usual table, with the usual people. One of those people is Mattheo...

Mattheo laughed at something Enzo said, leaning across the table to grab food off of Pansy's plate (much to Pansy's protest). 'I hope he has a good day.' I sigh, looking back down into my cup. I had my hands wrapped firmly around the mug, sipping the warm black nectar. Emma still teased me after all these years, calling me a "Yank" for preferring just plain old coffee over tea.

A masculine rumble broke me out of my thoughts as my eyes flickered up again to see what was happening. Oh. Theo was here. And he was yapping, per usual. What, when did he get here?

The man in question was leaning his hand onto the table to my right, looking down at Emma who was in between us. "Hey, honey..." He muttered, their voices getting collectively quieter as they got wrapped up in each other's presence.

I rolled my eyes, sitting up slightly to grab Cedric. He leaned forward, but not willingly. My hands firmly grasped his collar to pull him halfway across the table. "AH- Vera let go-" "Not until you get me a new dorm and a new table. I can't handle it anymore, DO YOU HEAR ME? TOO MUCH THEO! TOO MUCH!" I shouted, sleep deprivation getting to me.

Theo stopped whatever poem or other crap he was reciting for my friend, looking up just to glare at me. "Oh stop being the anti-Cupid just because you're jealous." I turn my head, poor Cedric still being subject to my grasp, just to glare right back at Theo.

"Jealous? What the hell would I be jealous of? The fact that y'all effortlessly behave as if you got SLEEP LAST NIGHT?" "No, jealous that no one got you flowers." "Flowers? What flow- awwww Emma those are so pretty!" I push Cedric back down, turning fully in my seat to see the pretty roses in her hands.

She smiled up at me, nodding. "Someone told him they were my favorite." Her lovesick grin made me crack a genuine smirk. I sigh, feigning disappointment as I respond, "Too bad they lied."

"WHAT?" Theo exclaimed, eyes widening in horror. "Veralynn Post quit lying to my boyfriend!" Emma cried out as I just laughed harder. "Sorry, sorry, I had to."

I straightened up my posture, leaning back over my food, finishing the rest of my coffee as the lovebirds said their goodbyes. We both watched as Theo made his way back to his side of the Hall, sliding in to sit next to Mattheo.

Mattheo.

He was looking right at me. I smiled hesitantly at him, but he just looked back at his own friends, conversation continuing like it never stopped.

Oh.

My heart skipped a beat and not in a good way. This happened sometimes. I'd think he was encouraging me, I'd make an attempt to reach out, he'd go back to acting like I barely existed. My thoughts wandered to Emma. Emma. She seemed to be a natural at taming the 'bad boys.'

She had broken down the walls of her man, her man who was so misunderstood and underappreciated. Theo wanted to be good for her. It was like she was a drug he couldn't walk away from, a book he just couldn't put down.

My final thought echoed in my head like a constant ringing in between my ears as my eyes felt glued to the man who held my heart. And I knew—I knew that while I was happy to be myself—that sometimes on the coldest of nights and loneliest of days, when the absence of his love and affection rang the loudest... sometimes I wish I was her.

Well, she's so New York when she's in L.A.​​ She won't lose herself in love the way that I did 'Cause she'll call you out, she'll put you in your place When Emma falls in love, I'm learning

It was only the start of our 6th year, but every morning felt as if I was waking up on death row. Like my days were numbered, and with each passing minute, the executioner took another step closer. I've always been able to comfort myself by saying, 'It's okay that I can't hold him in my arms. At least I can be near him.'

Being in his presence alone has always been enough for me. His aura, his being, his soul being in the same room as mine has been enough for me to be content. But with graduation comes the end of it all. The end of us. The end of him. You might be going, 'Ah but graduation is just next year! You have time!'

Time? Time? It's taken me six years to get to this point and you think one more will be the difference between my anguish and my happiness? The time needed to cause a change? When him and I, two separate souls, intwine to become just us? No. There's never enough time and I'm too much of a coward to try it now, with another year in Hogwarts, where I would have to suffer not only 6th but 7th year in embarrassment and rejection. Because Mattheo Riddle doesn't want an us.

'Who am I even kidding? There is no us, there never will be. I sound like a fucking stalker.' I scoff, aggressively zipping up my bag. Potions had ended a while ago but apparently, I spaced out, only coming to when Professor Snape closed a desk draw rather loudly. It was only me and three other students in the room with him, taking our time to pack up and clean our workstations.

"-Vera. VERA." My eyes snapped up, noticing Emma waving her hand in my face. I grimaced, pushing her hand away. "How long...?" "A few seconds." She answered, frowning. I squirmed under her scrutinizing overlook. Her eyes swirled with a flurry of emotions; confusion, doubt, concern, etc. "What? Do I have something on my face?" She frowned deeper at that.

Chuckling nervously I hiked my bag over my shoulder, leading us into the hallway as we began our trek to the courtyard. Once a week we always pack lunch ahead of time, and then walk down to the Black Lake to have a picnic together. It was the highlight of my day and the pick-me-up I've really needed this past week. 'I just hope we can get there before we run into Theo.'

Theo's been really good for her, and he's been really good to her. Honestly, never thought I'd say it, but he's become like a brother to me. I usually look forward to our playful banter and then watching him whine and pout and tell Emma she hasn't spent enough time with him, but something's been off with him lately.

His behavior is as if he's walking on eggshells around me. His glances were full of concern. His questions, 'How are you?', 'Do you need to talk?', etc., etc. have been way more persistent. Nothing about me has changed, at least I don't think it has. I have no clue how he's somehow gotten the skill to look right through my mask.

I risk a glance over at Emma, eyes narrowing. She was chewing her lip, her fingers tap tap tapping. It was a trait she picked up from me. She used to complain about how fidgety I was, constantly having to at least drum my fingers or shake my knee to be able to focus. Something that became more incessant as I would get nervous or uncomfortable.

And then I noticed her doing the same thing whenever she got... nervous. 'You must have rubbed off on me,' she'd say. Well, it's a two-way road, Emma. Because your annoyingly empathetic self rubbed off on me too.

I left her with a habit she hated, and she left me with the ability to read her emotions like a book. It had it's benefits. We push through the bustling crowd, making our way to the ‘glass room,’ as we so eloquently coined it in our 1st year. It was a room with an entire wall made up of windows and an almost simple back-patio-like door that worked as one of the many exits that led to the courtyard. It was our favorite, just because of how homey it felt.

I twist the doorknob, pulling the door open for her before following her outside. There was a small friendly match of quidditch being played on one side of the courtyard, some kids were studying, and there was just a general bustle of life out there. Both from the students and from nature. As we walked down the steps and into the grass, further past everyone, weaving through all the hubbub and finally getting away from all the prying ears, I turned toward Emma. We continued down to the lake but now we finally had privacy. 

“Emma, what’s been up with you? You and Theo, now that I mention it. It’s felt as if you’ve both been… watching me. It’s kinda weird.” I nervously laugh, running a hand through my blonde curls to push them out of my face. Our black robes with yellow accents swished with our movement, though Emma’s posture noticeably stiffened when I spoke up.

She slowed to a stop, hand reaching out to grab my own and making me halt right alongside her. “Em?-” “I know.” “Know what?” “I know you’re in love with him.” Time seemed to slow. My heart quickened and my hands started tap tap tapping. I tilted my head slightly, looking at her closer. I never told anyone, I never spoke a word about my feelings.

Which means she noticed, she caught on, and she figured it out. She’s the only one who could’ve figured it out. Theo’s too dense to have- she told him. “Love who?” I spat out, anger simmering just below the surface. She caught on to that too. “Matt-” I yank my hand from hers, stomping away from her and towards the water. “Vera! I’m not judging you- stop just stop running away!” “Running?!” I whip back around. “You told Theo!” 

Her eyes looked wet, her lip trembling as she took in my ruffled appearance. “I didn’t.” I scoffed. “I didn’t.” She repeated with a firmer tone this time. “He knows you enough to know something is wrong, but he doesn’t know what is wrong.” “My- my love isn’t wrong. It’s not the end of the world for someone to be loved by me.” I shutter out running a hand down my face as I try not to spiral.

I know she didn’t mean it like that, I know she didn’t mean to have that heart wrenching look of pity in her eyes. But I could just hear what she was thinking, my insecurities clanging like a gong in between my ears, ‘Oh Vera, how could you ever think he’d love you back?’

We stood in a field. Surrounded by tall grass and beautiful wildflowers, a lake just a few feet to our right, a tree about two yards to the left of us, and the sounds of our school echoing down the hill and filling the uncomfortable silence that fell upon us.

“Vera…” My friend’s words cut through that very silence, voice sincere. “...you love with a love so loyal, that you are content with standing on the sidelines for years. You love, with a love so fierce, that you will defend and fight and protect even when the object of your desire doesn’t take notice. You think I haven't noticed your absolute adoration toward the boy? I picked up on it back in 2nd year. You can’t keep secrets from me, you know that.” We both laughed through tears at that one.

I looked at her in shock, not knowing what to say. 

But she quickly spoke up before I could even fully process what she said before, “You love with a love anyone would be blessed to receive. But the fact of the matter is, you absolutely suck when it comes to confessions.”

My eyes narrowed at that sudden change in tone, getting whiplash from how fast she went from serious to downright insulting. It would be funny if the situation wasn't so emotional.

“You watch him from afar, you love him at a distance, but graduation is closer than it's ever been and you’re letting him slip through your fingers. I’ve watched you lose yourself in this love for long enough. It’s time, Vera. Tell him or move on but I won’t let you throw away our last years at Hogwarts just because you were trying to hold on to something you’ve never had.” I flinched at that, looking back toward the ground.

“I-I don’t know what you’re saying…” Evidently, Emma crossed the distance separating us, and I felt her hands comfortingly squeezing my shoulders. “I’m saying… it’s time you come clean. It’s time you tell Mattheo you’re in love with him.”

Emma met a boy with eyes like a man Turns out her heart fits right in the palm of his hand Now he'll be her shelter when it rains Little does he know, his whole world's about to change

So I told him I love him. 

KIDDING. After Emma surprise attacked me in that field, I ran back to our dorm and hid until noon the next day. She gave me her notes and we caught up on all the classes I missed, and then we talked for hours about him. And I told her everything.

Everything I felt toward him, everything I loved about him, everything I knew about him. She just smiled at me and rubbed my back during it all, giving nods of encouragement as I stuttered over my words.

The days went by as I tried to figure out what to do. I’d sound absolutely bonkers if I just went up to him and professed my undying affection. I’d become every other girl! ‘Except this time, it’d be a girl who truly cares about him…’ I thought bitterly to myself.

Every time I started to brainstorm on how I could run into him or get his attention, I felt like a crazy person. Like someone could peer into my thoughts and watch as I spiraled further and further into the madness of conspiracy theories and red string. It felt wrong to be so… calculated with him. He deserves better than that.

So I stayed quiet, waiting for an opportunity but not pushing it. Waiting for the stars to align and him to drop in my lap. Waiting like I’ve been waiting for the past six years. My frown deepened at that thought, heart weary as I walked into Transfiguration. Three things immediately drew my attention to the far corner of the room.

The object of my affections was actually… attending class.

He was sitting in my seat.

He was staring right at me.

I gulp, hands flexing around the strap of my satchel, nervously and uncomfortably holding eye contact with his gorgeous chocolate pools, the windows to his soul. The only way to describe the emotions swarming in those very same windows, was… curiosity? Amusement? Warmth? It was hard to tell at this distance—the occasional student walking to their seat or passing by to meet up with their friends making it hard to gaze wholly into his eyes.

‘Oh how I wish I knew what you were thinking…’ I shake my head, breaking that train of thought as well as the spell Mattheo and I seemed to be under. A shoulder bumps into me, reminding me I was planted in the doorway. I crossed the threshold, walking towards Mattheo— my desk.

“I’d say I was happy to see you but I’d be happier if I had my own seat.” I prodded jokingly as I sat down rather heavily in the seat to his left. A laugh slipped out of his lips, the corners of his mouth curling into a smile, throwing his head to the side to look at me. “Your seat? I’ve never seen you sit here, baby.” Mattheo teased, eyes glinting with humor.

I felt my cheeks burn at that comment. He said it so casually, that term of endearment that I would give anything to hear him say with meaning.

Our interactions always went this way. He'd shamelessly flirt with me (making me feel as if I couldn't breathe), I tried my best to meet his challenge (occasionally I got him to blush too), and it always ended with him walking away without a backwards glance. ‘Stop, stop thinking that. He’s talking to you, talk back!’ My inner Jiminy Cricket chides.

“You’ve never seen me sit here? Well, darling, I’d have to say this is the first time I’ve seen you in this class. It’s no wonder you’ve never noticed me sitting here.” Mattheo’s eyes widened slightly at that but his smile never faded, pleasantly surprised respond with your own pet-name. 

“Wizards and witches, quiet down!” Professor McGonagall called out, dropping a heavy book onto her desk. The sound of the loud thud echoed as the surrounding voices hushed to a silence. She had everyone’s attention. Well, everyone except for the two kids in the far corner.

We continued gazing into each other’s eyes, brows furrowing into an almost challenge to see who’d turn away first. “Ah, Mr. Riddle. Glad to see you bothered to grace us with your presence.” The older woman clicked her tongue, effectively pulling us apart, our eyes breaking contact as our heads whipped toward her. “Talk to me after class.” McGonagall made sure to stare point blank at Mattheo, voice steady and tone devoid of humor. “Fuck, she looks mad.” I put my hand over my mouth, holding in a snicker at Mattheo’s whispered comment as our teacher begins her lesson. “Stop, you’re gonna get us in trouble.” I scold, opening my notebook and reaching into my bag looking for a quill. Oh crap.

My eyes widened in panic. No quill. I started unzipping the different pockets, rummaging around, hoping that with enough silent begging and prayer, one would just magically appear. ‘It’s fitting we’re in Transfiguration… maybe the lesson will be on “Making Your Own Quill.”’

I’m pulled out of my inner grumbling with a tap on my shoulder. I was bent over toward the side, in between Mattheo and I’s tables, searching as silently as possible for anything to write with. So the sudden feeling of two fingers tapping my arm made me jump slightly.

I glance up, seeing the prettiest and most annoyingly smug grin. “If I lend you a quill, will you lend me your seat?” He asked, tapping on the chair he was leaning back in. I frown, eyebrows furrowing yet again as I sit back up. “You not only brought one, but two quills? I didn’t know you owned a notebook.” I whisper back, happily shocked to find out he had planned to pay attention today.

“No, I brought one. And trust me, it was a spur of the moment decision. Deep down we both know I wasn’t gonna use it anyway. Just take it.” He finally pulled out the writing tool from his bag, sliding it onto the wood slab in front of me.

“Mattheo I can’t take your onl-” “You can, and you will.” He smirked, insisting. "Well..." I sigh, nodding as I picked up the feather. "...Mattheo Riddle. You are my hero." "Call me any day baby, I'm happy to rescue such a beautiful damsel." His eyes glinted with amusement at my burning cheeks.

He turned back to face the front of the class, his heart stopping stupid ass grin staying plastered on his gorgeous stupid ass face. ‘He called me bea-HE CALLED ME BEAUTIFUL. What the heck is happening.' I close my eyes, breathing in and out a few times to try to get control over my racing thoughts.

'Will I ever get used to the utter heart palpitations this man causes me to have? It’s like a rabbit is trapped in my chest.’ I shake my head, looking back down at my journal.

I didn’t even know where to begin, utterly lost in this day's lecture as the past however-many-minutes was spent paying attention to Mattheo and panicking over my lack of writing tools rather than the actual subject Professor McGonagall was droning on about.

My thoughts wander back to what I was thinking of before I saw the beautiful boy to the right of me. I’ve been waiting for six years. For six years I’ve been waiting for the perfect opportunity to drop in my lap, or for Riddle to come profess his love to me, or something, anything. I can’t even remember at this point.

I was tired of it all. Tired of waiting, tired of not knowing, tired of not living just because I yearned for something I didn’t have. I dip the quill in the ink, hesitating as the tip hovered over paper. The ink gathered at the point, almost falling off and splattering on the white page.

I glance to my right, gazing fondly at him. His profile, his curls, his general posture as he tried to pretend he was paying attention but he was simultaneously fighting sleep. His eyes kept fluttering shut and he was slumping further and further down into his chair.

I look back down at the paper. I’m tired of waiting. And so I began writing.

I met a boy with eyes like a man Turns out my heart fits right in the palm of his hand Now I’ll be his shelter when it rains Little does he know, his whole world's about to change

[callsign-rogueone]

Ohh can we get director's cut for "together" please?:3

of course! I love talking about these three 🖤🌿⚔️

why I wrote this:

I’ve wanted to do something with a reader bandaging Xaden’s 107 cuts for a while now, but I’m still very awkward in writing for him bc in my mind that’s bestie Violet’s man and not ours 😅 so making it Garrick and Angel was a compromise — still a tender moment with baby shadow boy being taken care of and held, but not in a romantic sense. plus they’re supposed to be like… 17? at the time so I didn’t want to make it weird. idk.

some highlights / things I’m proud of / etc:

-> poor baby Xay asking for help cleaning the cuts… “I’d do it myself, but I can’t see them.” -> he wants to be the strong one and get through all of this alone but he can’t, both physically (he can’t reach the cuts or see them) and emotionally (he needs someone to be there for him and hold him and let him cry.)

-> he has to lay facedown because the cuts are on his back,, but also this adds vulnerability — he’s exposed, and not in a position of power, not in control or ready to attack, just… laying there, defeated. and angel finding a way to provide physical comfort, with him laying down on a pillow and her petting his hair just like a mama would… 🥺

-> the callback to his mom leaving wasn’t originally in there but it hit me at the last minute and I thought it added depth — in a situation like this, bb just needs his mom but she’s long gone by now. and so there’s a parallel I drew there between bb gare and angel comforting him this way at 10-11 when mom left, and now at 16-17. the only two times he cried in front of them, which is an indicator that both of those situations are a Big Deal, defcon three, all hands on deck.

“You don’t tell him it’s okay, because it isn’t, but you need to say something, to acknowledge his pain and the sacrifice he’d just made for you and all of your friends, for people neither of you have even met.”

-> in my mind this is 10000% angel. but again I left it vague on purpose. anyway, angel knows. she knows that it isn’t okay. it won’t be okay for a long time. so she isn’t going to tell him that it is, even if it’s well-intentioned, because that would dismiss the fact that he is very much in pain right now and this situation is super messed up and decidedly Not Okay. idk. pet peeve of mine showing.

“He takes Garrick’s hand in his, holding it silently, a gesture with multiple meanings; a bid for comfort, wanting to have his best friends close, but also a reminder that the three of you are in this together, and an apology…”

-> they can’t hug bc it would hurt bb boy but I still wanted them to touch somehow. no toxic masculinity here!! they’re holding hands and cuddling because I said so, and because these three are family now — they kinda always have been, but now they’re all each other has.

-> I headcanon the boys being very physical with one another, and I spread that throughout my work — they spar, arm wrestle… at some point in “what was I made for?” one of them has the other in a headlock giving a noogie… let them be idiots, your honor!!! they’re 23 year old boys!! let them wrassle, and have a safe outlet for their emotions!

“You’re all going to be sore when you wake up from sleeping like this, bar Xaden, who looks perfectly comfortable where he’s curled up between you like an overgrown puppy.”

-> these boys are all tall and muscle-y and big tough dragon riders, but they still need to be held sometimes. let them be the little spoon!! let them curl up and fall asleep on top of you!! sweet bbs need to be wrapped in a warm blanket and cuddled and spoon-fed ice cream and given head scratches after the shit they’ve been though. they just need love — that’s half the reason I made the girlfriends. and this situation absolutely necessitated a puppy pile on the couch.

-> I just love this trio. the friend group of all time. but these three all have that rare, long-lasting “we’ve known each other since we could talk” bond. they’re not friends, they’re family. sticking “this is a set, do not separate” labels on each of their foreheads as we speak.

-> in my little happily-ever-after AU I’m drafting, uncle Xaden is the kids favorite and they love him to death. it’s adorable. he’s actually all of the kids’ favorite, even though he’s outwardly “scary”. but that’s not what you asked for so I’ll stop talking

this was terrible to format on my phone but I can’t sit up to use the laptop rn so sorry. I might go back and fix it later when I have the spoons but that’s doubtful :/

[akolnoix]

I love your art sm!!!!!! Do you have any drawing tips / process examples?

thank you!

i don't take many progress pics, so here's a timelapse just for you.

i'm almost entirely self-taught (and in a very uneven manner lol) so i can't offer much in the way of technical skills. so i'll just say a few of the things i'm glad to have learned over the years. (largely wrt digital art)

-if you really dislike a step in the process, there's a good chance you can decide to just... not do it. hate doing lineart? you can just neaten up your sketch a bit, or go completely lineless. hate coloring? switch to black and white. hate shading? just don't do it.

you'll draw a lot more if you enjoy it, and in the future you'll probably get in the mood to try again at something you used to hate, and re-evaluate, so you're not missing out.

like for a while i drew almost entirely in black+white because i hated coloring, and then i played theresia: dear emile and was hit with the inspiration to work with color again, and i've continued to do so ever since.

on the other hand, i've been doing digital art almost exclusively for like 10 years now. occasionally i'll be in the mood to draw with an actual pencil again, so i do it. and my decision is reaffirmed haha

-the scope of your character drawing will truly unlock the moment you realize there is no fundamental difference between drawing men and women, only specific features that differ on a person by person basis

-most programs will let you use any brush as an eraser (or "draw with clear"), it's a lifesaver for using heavily textured brushes

-use pureref for your reference images. idk how i worked without it for so long.

-fall in love with drawing noses. they're one of the most distinctive parts of the face, and so many people just default to one or two types!!

-sketch on a grey canvas, instead of a white one. spare your eyes the strain

-the artists who actually went to school are right, you really should use references. they making everything so much easier AND you improve your skills. win win scenario

[saskiavalentineapologist]

sketch time

you will sit down. you will look at my horrible little women. And You Will Appreciate Them

no this is NOT going under a cut you will see the blood sweat and tears i put into belialah's demon form and you will appreciate it, me, and saskia's off the charts world class monsterfucker status

we got saskia. we're familiar with saskia--or at least you should be. go look at the art by korppipoika and give them so many notes--this post will wait. and while you're out, look at the post about the matriarchs too. and if you're not up to date on saskia and belialah, here's another one for your list. i'll be here when you get back.

up to date? excited? horny? me too!!

so we got those two. in order for the images: saskia (recent), belialah (first draft, still happy with this and haven't been able to capture this vision since)

we got their dynamic:

saskia being a bitch and belialah being, despite everything, head over heels. still can't quite nail belialah's human face, but we're learning

...it took me a long time to nail down belialah's demon form. it went through a lot of drafts---many of which i am not sharing. this one is the oldest one i'm willing to share:

i believe this is draft 3? patch notes from earlier drafts: 4 fingers instead of three, took out "humanoid" eyes, added floaty halo bits. other than that, this is what it's mostly stayed true to. chase gave me an inspo and i remixed it and made it worse because i love body horror. so we have this! extra joint between the wrist and elbow, loads and loads of eyes, sharp teeth (yum!), wings, and a broken halo plus the big horn. love her. she has spider legs below her waist--she has "skirts" that are made from her skin that she usually wears (has?) over them.

made some eensy sketches for ideas:

i tinkered on size, proportion, posture, etc. it's vague, but not exact for either of them. i want a bigger height difference and this is for me first and foremost

i settled on this body type for saskia:

no nipples so she's not naked :) this is for anatomy reference, tumblr. ANATOMY. be so nice to me ;-;

ignore the stuff at the edges, this is part of a larger project idk if i'll finish where i look at all the matriarchs and their body types. saskia is the most...well, besides ethalind, the most hourglass shape. this is the most recent drawing of her i have besides the one at the very end, this is the one i would say is most canon. hence why it is included--the last one i have doesn't quite hit right for me. still working on consistency.

as i improved my art, i wanted to take another stab at belialah. which meant figuring out her lower half.

i did these ones reeaaally recently. i looked at so many things for inspo: crabs, spiders, human pelvises, centaur speculative biology, drider speculative biology, an introspective look at how much of a monsterfucker i am, etc. until i found something i was happy with. these are within the last few days. the lil sketches at the far bottom right of the first page are what i settled on. after that, i tinkered with how she looks with skirts vs no skirts---ignore the sword, it's no longer accurate to what it actually looks like, but that's endgame shit and no spoilers :)

i'm really happy with how she's turned out and i think she's kickass and awesome and i can't wait to beat her and saskia into the ground.

and then we have:

team gaslight gatekeep girlboss :)

i drew this last night!! really happy with how my art is coming along. i hesitated on whether to draw the skirts, because i think the spider legs are so fucking cool and i know logically the skirts are there but tbh its funner drawing the spider legs than the skirts :(

i want to make it very clear: belialah is submissive in the way a guard dog is submissive, to quote a post i once tagged as gilt and lost. belialah is loyal, devoted, willing to protect--but will wait for an order before acting

btw, to make something else clear: saskia? saw the demon form first. is more attracted to the demon form than the human form. is far more willing to smash with belialah in demon form. i love my weirdest little freak of a woman <3

ok that's all bye

[vtforpedro]

long life update - TWs in tags

It feels like it's been ages. I'm so exhausted and in a lot of physical pain. Going on two months of it being the worst it's been right after a couple of months of the best it's been. Chronic pain + grief + trying to get help from doctors who should have their licenses revoked + dealing with a shit relationship with my mom + a good, decades-long friendship ending + the ongoing disability process with the SSA + LAW FIRMS.

I'm so fucking tired. I don't remember if I updated that the appeals council decided not to review my case because the 'judge followed the law' except that he didn't. So, as it turns out, my original attorney (and he did not tell me this) before he left, wrote that if they denied me, it should go to federal district court.

I'm now working with a NY law firm to take my case to federal court because my current law firm believes it has merit, and I guess they do, too. That's how fucked the decision was, and I'm glad my initial reaction of bewilderment and anger was spot on lol

The good news is, it should only take another year! ._.

My neurologist is the worst doctor I have ever come across and I'm quite literally stuck with him with nowhere else to go. I wish him upon no one. I'm so tired of calling the SSA, getting documents to them, signing things for law firms, contacting law firms, getting no responses, and contacting them all over and over again. I am in incredible physical pain, like this actively makes my neuro stuff worse. Everything makes it worse. I have autonomic testing in a few days, and idk if I'll get through it b/c I have to stop the meds that keep me out of the ER two days prior, and it scares me.

My relationship with my mom is fractured and I don't feel like family therapy is actually helping. I had to end a friendship with someone I love and care very much about but who was growing too comfortable mistreating me and I was giving them too many passes 😞 I've known them for the better part of two decades.

It's been over seven months since my cat Isis died. I don't know how. It feels like she was here just yesterday. Yet, all the nights I've sat and talked to her and wept are all too real. I miss her more than I can say. She was my soul cat. I keep thinking about tomorrow and how she'd be so nosy getting into EVERYthing when gifts are opened at Christmas. Having to stop her, move her, laugh because she was just so n o s y and it was hilarious. And she's not gonna be here for that ever again.

I'm having a really fucking hard time tonight. It's just hitting me how god-awful this year has been and how I have a bad week to look forward to before even getting to the new year lmao I have to stop taking so many of my medications 48hrs before 1.5-2hrs of testing to see if we can find out Yet Another Thing Wrong With Me but knowing my luck it'll be 'no findings' and the mystery of why my core body temp plummets to 93.9 in the blink of an eye won't be solved until I have suffered juuuuust enough.

It never ends. Never. I want to give up. I'm so tired of doing this. I don't want to anymore. It never. fucking. ends.

I absolutely cannot say it's all been bad, though. I've met incredible, warm, welcoming, giving, kind people this year. Y'all have helped me more than you know and I'm so so so lucky to be able to call you my friends. This year has sucked for so many of us, but I want to say I'm proud of you, and I love you all very much.

My fic is gonna be printed in a hardcover zine early next year. I participated in a Big Bang for the first time and that'll also go out early next year. I'm hosting a tiny event in my tiny fandom server that I'm super excited about. I have a raffle prize to write (bagginshield !!!! SO EXCITED to revisit the og otp) and a Valentine's gift to write for another fandom.

I posted 401,000 words this year and wrote many more unfinished wips, plus a long one (90k) that I am very invested in finishing.

I painted and drew so much this year. I improved a lot, too! I got a couple of portraits printed from inprnt to see how they looked, and it was MY art, and they were GORGEOUS. I thought I would hate seeing my art professionally printed, but no! I almost cried. They looked so lovely.

My cat Lilly had health issues almost immediately following Isis's passing, but she is doing so well right now. She's blossomed into another cat, and while she's not my constant companion, she is with me so much more than she used to be. When she walks onto my desk I am to stop everything and hold her like baby in my arms until she decides that's enough (or I really need to move) lmaaao she's such a goober. My heart cat. <3

I'm not doing well right now--my MH is bad. Especially tonight. But it felt good to write the good things.

I'm sorry for my lack of replies and kinda disappearing. I'm running on fumes. I hope next year will bring physical relief so emotional relief can happen.

For those of you facing difficulties of any kind, I am holding your hand in spirit.

[sunshine304]

Another Fanbinding Post!

My latest project was @dragongirlg-fics's “Don’t Forget” and now that the gift copy has arrived, I can finally post about it! :D I read this fic very early on when I came into the fandom and it’s been in the back of my mind ever since. When I was suddenly hit with an idea for the case design, I decided to spontaneously do this binding because the idea was taking up too much headspace. XD

My camera always struggles with capturing the blue of this particular paper, and that ribbon is silver silk.

I’d also gotten it into my head that I wanted illustrations for the chapter headers and so I went and drew them myself. I hadn’t drawn in forever and it’s not like I was ever really great at it, but I think they turned out well enough.

I also drew the title picture to resemble the painting mentioned in the fic, though I couldn’t do the watercolours as I didn’t have the right paper for that. A bit of editing in Photoshop it was, then.

It was the first time I tried a three piece bradle binding and the paper for the case fought me a lot… My copy has some wrinkles and stuff because of it, as the way the case is assembled did not sit well with the paper. It might also be that I didn’t let the paper rest enough after putting the paste on, IDK.

I did all the case titling and decorations with a hot foil pen and that fought me, too, as all those parts that needed colouring in didn’t work so well on the first try. Second time worked better, at least, as did the cover assembly in general, as I now knew what to look out for.

That second time around, for dragongirlG's copy, I also pressed the shit out of those case boards after I'd glued the paper on. XD

With the case design, I wanted to lean a bit into the bunny theme of the fic, because those bunnies show up all the time. :D There's a lovely, important Chinese quote as well that seemed to fit onto the back cover (and OMG I'm so happy that I managed to write it straight! XD).

The typeset wasn’t too difficult, overall, though Open Office did annoy me at the beginning as it refused to format the pages correctly, which led to me just deleting the whole thing and starting over. XD

There are some things that didn't work out perfectly, like a crease in the endpaper that should not have been there. But luckily, the pattern on the paper kinda hides that. XD My copy also has some little hot foil smears here and there because OMG people, I was really struggling there. XD

Overall, though, I’m really pleased with how this book turned out! I added the silk ribbon on the cover because I felt like there was something missing with all that dark blue… It also meant going hunting for the right silver ribbon. XD

Materials used:

Printed on Clairefontaine DCP 100g (long grain)

Case + endpapers:

- booklinen Brillianta - Efalin paper - French marbled paper 120g - hot foil (on brand)

[monsterlovinghours]

What about the Dons in DnD world? 🤔

I'm sure some are really easy but fell free to do an in depth analysis on their role and backstory. (The easiest one would definitely be Scarabee 👀)

Ooooohh. Since I'm on my phone and typing out long things is hard I prooooobably won't go too in-depth but I invite y'all to reblog with your own thoughts and opinions!

-A while back @realmonsterboyhours drew Bajo as a tiefling and now I can't see him as anything else. He's also bard coded, he's definitely got the charisma for it--he also plays that sexy flamenco guitar.

-You're absolutely right though, Scarabee is a no-brainer. Obviously a warlock, he's got a patron already part of his lore. Has just about every spell or potion ingredient you could think of up in his attic. As for race, I could see a half-elf. Like, there's something of the fey about him, but he's been human or at least knows what being human is like.

-Zhuk is an orc and I'll die on this hill. He's big, he's beefy, he's large and in charge. I'm also going with barbarian, based solely again on art drawn by @realmonsterboyhours of him holding a sledgehammer. Imagine big-ass swords in those meathooks of his. Or a giant axe. Or just picture him saying "fuck it" and beating someone to death with his bare hands. Look at me and tell me he wouldn't do it. Not because he isn't civilized or intelligent but because someone's gotta do the dirty work.

-Cia is an elf druid. I mean, *look at him.* Mans is about as fey coded as you can get and looks like he didn't see something that wasn't a tree until he hit triple digits. If you took the daddy energy out of Halsin, you'd be left with Ciaróg. Also, he helps his tiefling husband with his rose gardens and how cute is that??

-Gio is an enigma. He's absolutely an eldritch horror, but just for funsies, I think he'd take the form of a drow. After a couple of centuries he might change his form, but drow is his favorite. He has a lot of arcane knowledge, things that beings of this plane shouldn't know, so he just tells everyone he's a wizard. Did a lot of studying, you know.

-Saft a half-orc artificer. He's a bit of a big boi, sturdy and thick, but despite his size and his brutish heritage, he can tinker with the most delicate mechanisms. Mostly uses his knowledge to make explosives and weapons; incendiary devices are his favorite. Has built so many guns.

-Bjalla is a vampire. "hhhh but what's his race" LISTEN HERE I'M NOT CHANGING WHAT'S ALREADY PERFECT. Of course he's a fucking vampire, what else would he be? And yes, I believe he would be a rogue. No, I am not saying this because I'm also madly in love with Astarion. There will be no further questions. He's canonically an assassin, you can't tell me he wouldn't be a rogue. Yes, I have a type, leave me alone dammit.

-Mozzie gives me dwarf energy, though his size doesn't quite gel with that idea. Maybe an earth genasi? Something earthy idk. He also gives ranger vibes, someone who travels a bunch. Though in this realm of high fantasy, since internet isn't a thing, he deals in information. He can gather intel, spread rumors, manipulate the flow of knowledge from one person or place to another.

-Lag is a firbolg. He's big, he's fluffy, he's a big ol sweetheart who couldn't hurt a soul if he tried. Also probably a druid, though he's less concerned with plant life and more with animals. He's the fauna to Cia's flora.

-Devlin is a shifter. Like, it's obvious, right? Clearly he's a shifter, he's werewolf coded. And honestly, I think he's our cleric, just because I had the idea that the deity he worships is so ancient and he's been cursed so many times, he's actually forgotten its name. But also how funny would it be to have a cleric that bestows blessings and makes things holy by literally absorbing the curses and evil magic. It's fine, he's fine, it doesn't hurt! Not anymore, anyway.

[curseofdelos]

starcrossed au??👀

This is the Big project I'm working on atm!! It's a solangelo longfic in which they have a star-crossed lovers plotline <3 going to keep the circumstances that's keeping them apart to myself for now since this one is going to take a while to finish, but I'm having a lot of fun with it <3

The early stages of their relationship of this one is so fun to me. Idk if this counts as enemies to friends to lovers because I'm just not convinced that 'enemies' is an accurate descriptor, but there are Vibes for sure. Will is trying SO HARD to defeat Nico, but Nico is unbothered and vibin' it's a fun dynamic <3

Also it's already SO LONG I'm 15k words in and I'm only now just getting to the 'friends' stage. I hope you like 40k+ oneshots because this one is going to be Up There 🙃

A snippet:

Nico looked him over, taking in his stance and the way his fingers were wrapped around the hilt. “Do you even know how to use that thing?”  “Yes!” Will snapped. “Now fight me!”  Nico seemed unsure about Will’s latest tactic for bypassing him, but he drew his sword anyway. Will got the impression that Nico was humouring him more than anything else. He wasn’t cocky in how he approached Will, but he carried himself with a quiet confidence as if there was no doubt in his mind that he could win this, and that going through with the fight was nothing more than a formality.  Somehow, that bothered Will more.  With a yell, Will charged Nico and stabbed at him with his dagger.  Nico easily caught the blade with his sword, and twisted it until Will was forced to release his grip and the knife clattered to the ground.  Nico raised a brow at him in silent amusement. Will’s cheeks burned in embarrassment.  “That was a lucky shot,” Will grumbled and picked his dagger back up. Nico didn’t even try to stop him.  “You know you’re at a disadvantage with that thing, right? Your dagger doesn’t have the reach my sword does, and you won’t be able to get close enough to hit me.”  “I’ve been practising against a sword fighter. I can do it,” Will said firmly, despite his internal lack of confidence.  Nico didn’t seem convinced, but he waved for him to try again anyway. 

[an-aura-about-you]

I have finally got my house mostly clean including fully cleaning my bathroom, so let's see how much Handbook for Mortals I can do during the rest of my lunch.

going into Chapter 10 part 1:

when we last left our hero, Scheherazade hadn't really done anything, but we saw a bunch of boys gushing about her. seems kinda ironic since one of those characters bothers to mention that girls gush when they like a guy and we hadn't actually seen that yet.

anyway, Chapter 10: The Hanged Man

-tbh I can't think of the Hanged Man without thinking of Drumbot Brian in High Noon Over Camelot, and I would probably enjoy this a lot better if the Mechanisms showed up and caused a bunch of violence.

-Zade, as usual, is thinking about Mac and Jackson, but this time she's at the same bar where the gang celebrated Drew's birthday! idk if I mentioned that Zade wasn't there because she doesn't actually make an effort to make friends.

-she once again says Mac and Jackson had been friends before, but again, we don't really see this. Jackson spent his part of the last chapter needling Mac about how he's going after Zade. that is literally the only time we've seen those two interact and it was antagonistic.

-here we are, 11 chapters into the book (remembering to count Chapter 0) and we FINALLY get something resembling world building, and it's cribbed from Queen Terf's magical British school system books because Zade tells us it's frowned upon for those with magic (no I am not gonna spell it with the k) to get with mortals.

-this is also the first time Zade mentions ANYTHING about her father, and that's saying he's a mortal. this is insulting with all the other shit she's keeping under wraps about her dad.

-Zade's like, "I wasn't marrying anyone," as if we haven't been hit over the head every single time someone brings up dating that a long-term commitment is expected. girl, forever is not guaranteed. what happened to just dating people? for fun?

-quotations are placed weird in this bit:

Jackson was close to perfect minus the whole "just a mortal situation"

also

...something I hadn't quite place [sic] my finger on.

-"It could just be fear and my lack of ability to want to make a decision." excuse the fuck outta me?????? I'm so mad that this is going unexamined. you KNOW you're gonna have to make a choice at SOME point right? if you're insisting that the love triangle is the most significant thing going on in this book, that means you're gonna have to figure out WHY you don't want to make a decision. is it the destiny bullshit? do you have any agency at all??????

-this following passage pisses me off so bad:

I have always hated making tough decisions, but usually the tarot was far more helpful than it had been so far, considering that it hadn't given me a clear-cut winner no matter how I asked it. Its "freewill clause" must have been behind some kind of weird lesson I was supposed to learn.

first off, you IGNORED a trump card in your spread because you ~didn't know why it was there~ meaning you're skipping over any insight you might have gotten from it. (though if we're going with my interpretation, you overlooked it because seeing it would have meant admitting to yourself that you're the problem.) you also overlooked part of the nature of the Lovers in your spread, a fairly important part since its imagery was mirrored in another card in that same spread.

second, what the fuck do you mean by this "freewill clause" bullshit???? I know you're some kind of fatalist, but if that's the case why are you even entertaining the idea of free will? and if you're not a fatalist, then you know that means the cards are telling you that YOU'RE the one who has to make the choice on this one, right?????

I get. so very mad when tarot cards are viewed this way. they help you make decisions through interrogation, meditation, and self-examination, not because they're a 78-sided die in a Magic 8 Ball!

(╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻

my poor tarot cards are now scattered all over the floor.

and my lunch is basically over so we're putting a pin in it.

[shellovish]

003: urbosa, mipha, sidon, zelda, teba (no revali bc i know you will rank him first)

I mean you're not wrong-

I wrote whole essays, sorry. I've just been in a zelda mood recently, for no reason, no reason what so ever,, totally

No. 5, Urbosa

I'll be honest here, I'm not a big fan of Urbosa. Nothing against her, it's just nothing about her character really appealed to me. I also really hate the Gerudo Desert, so that probably isn't helping.

No. 4, Sidon

I haven't played through botw in a while, so I've probably forgotten or overlooked something, but his character always felt so dependent if that's the right word? idk. But I think his story relies a lot on Mipha and his grief, which does make sense thematically, but makes him very one-note. It's also why I'm not big on sidlink, since the pairing is rather dull in my opinion. Just say you think Sidon is hot, why bring link into this? (of course, no hate to sidlink shippers)

No. 3, Teba

It physically hurts me to place him here, but the Vah Medoh quest was very underwhelming compared to the others, which made Teba's character feel disappointing. Not bad, but disappointing, considering the other companions. But that's not to say there's nothing there. I'm fond of the connections between him and other characters, which was scarce with Yunobo and Riju especially I feel, (less so with Sidon but it doesn't hit the same). I think that's also what drew me to Rito Village instead of the other towns in game, that sense of community and closeness. His relationships with the other villagers are great worldbuilding, like his rocky yet caring relationship with Saki, his "friendship" with Harth, the obvious love and proudness he feels for Tulin, and his admiration for Revali is really cute. I hope totk brings more life to these characters (same goes for Sidon), but I'm not hopeful. Still! Love me some bird men!

No. 2, Mipha

I would put her in 1st, but that would make me a hypocrite :) Most of her true characterization comes from aoc to me, because just like Sidon, her character in botw is mostly based on her love for Link, which turned me off for a long time, especially considering the difference between zora and hylian aging, which I usually decide to ignore or change in some way (which on a side note, was originally fine until the english localization which turned Finley and Sasan's relationship from platonic to romantic?? guys what the fuck). I would've put Mipha lower on this list originally, since I have the same qualms with her character in botw as I do Sidons, but aoc kind of saves her for me. She feels more realistic now, because real people definitely do not make their one personality trait about another person, definitely not. I really like aoc as a whole, because it was basically $60 for champion content with a free fighting game attached. The interaction she had with Daruk about sparring made my heart soar, I really hope we get some champion content in totk, even if it's just a memory or two.

No. 1, Zelda

Zelda hits all the right marks for me as a character, with her personality and actions in the games feeling very real and personal, to me specifically. Her storyline is not only great worldbuilding for the franchise as a whole, being the first time we've heard of her failing to unlock her sealing powers (to my knowledge), but also relatable. She is a teenager, and has lots of pressure on her. She acts out and is frustrated with the world around her. She is basically reduced to a vessel for the sealing power, and it must do wonders for her self esteem. She takes this frustration and anger out on the people close to her. I can only speculate on what this must have done to her mental health, and let's not even talk about post-calamity. As I said before, her character hits very close to home for me, and that's why she has the top spot on this list. This is actually the same reason I like Revali so much, as both of them feel very personal to me. I also think her dynamics with the other characters are *chefs kiss*. You know she was besties w/ Revali. I'm very curious to see what they'll do with her in totk, considering choices revealed in the trailer I'm not too happy about.

This was a fun one to write, even though my fingers hurt now. It's not often I get to write out my thoughts, so thank you!

[torchickentacos]

Hi hmmm i guess my WIP themes rn are mid-life crises. I mean I told you my Norman idea but I'm also working on a moms fic that happens pretty much right after Caroline's divorce and just about Delia helping her through it. Also, early 20s crises AKA Chloe not knowing if she wants to keep doing contests. It's been months since I've updated oops but I think some of it hits a lil close to home rn.

Also, just relationships w/ ppl across distance and time? Idk if that makes sense but my appeal fic has Dawn competing in Hoenn with Kenny, Drew, etc. while Zoey is competing in the master rank in Sinnoh and kinda having a tough time, and just how they miss each other and keep in touch and support each other through it. My OT4 fic spans AG to at least XY, I think Drew will travel with the gang for some of AG before he and May go to Johto, and after that there'll be occasional calls and reunions and time skips and such. Very much a WIP lol. I guess one of my shigesatogou WIPs falls into that category too just bc at that point it's been years since Gary's really talked to Ash so he feels a lil weird about how close he and Goh are.

Whew that got long anyways I hope u enjoyed reading this friend! <3

HIIIIIIIII ANSWERING ASKS NOW I AM SO HAPPY I GOT SOME! I asked for them and then took a quiz and a shower and made dinner and didn't answer them oops. SO.

First off, we love a good midlife crisis. And now I kind of want to make a norman midlifecrisisdivorcecore amv to this song, which I only know isnce I'm the oldest of four. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1XSdEo0Fel8 And I LOVE seeing the moms content so lmk when that's posted! and YES I can see the chloe thing hitting close to home-idk what your situation is, but in general early twenties is seemingly prime real estate for quarterlife crises. I feel like I have one every other week.

And, putting my usual lighthearted taylor self away for a second here, I think it's really important to write those stories about relationships across time and distance. It's something that I've struggled with a lot personally, and it feels like it never gets easier to keep in touch with people. I love that concept narratively, though, and there's a lot of potential for emotional rollercoasters there. There's potential for so many complicated emotions-one that sticks out to me that I'm writing in my wip is the idea of hearing about how good smeone's been doing without you and wishing that, in some capacity, they could at least pretend to be as broken up about the timing and distance as you are. idk.

Is this the may/drew/ash/gary OT4 because I am IN LOVE with the idea of them! I feel like my answer isn't hella coherent but I am looking forward to everything you've mentioned here- especially the ot4 and moms content!!!!!