Tumgik
#idk what else to give them tho
bobus · 4 months
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another wof au doodle, kinda happy with this mayor design but they look bland without any accessories lol
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midnightmah07 · 5 months
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Finished Damali's room yippeeeeee
The cleaned up rooms for the dorms can be found here btw!
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the-woman-upstairs · 4 months
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It’s just…so painful to watch Armand readily submit in order to obtain the love he so desperately craves. And while it’s most assuredly a manipulative tactic, it’s still one borne out of fear and desperation. He cannot lose this person he’s come to love and so will become whatever they want, do whatever they want just so they’ll stay with him. But it won’t be enough. No matter how much he acquiesces or seeks to control (himself, others, the environment), he won’t be able to make Louis stay with him in the perfect life, perfect self he built in the hopes of finally being loved. It will all crumble with Armand left alone in the rubble of what he created, the author of his own abandonment.
#this unfortunately hits way too close to home for me#let’s not even get into Claudia’s anger at never being enough#iwtv spoilers#interview with the vampire#armand#this is just me speaking from personal experience…but there is definite manipulation at play here from Armand#and I don’t necessarily mean that pejoratively- when you’re desperate for people to like/love you you’ll become whatever they want#or whatever you think they’d want and you give it to them so they’ll want to keep you around#I’ve done it so often with the people in my life- and make no mistake it’s also a survival tactic#you give someone what they want they won’t hurt you#and when that’s how you survive for years and years it becomes the default method of interacting with others#even with normal people who genuinely mean you no harm you revert to that people pleasing mode#as a means of control both external and internal#this is what i see armand doing- his way of surviving that he’s never truly broken out of#armand ceding coven control to Louis and curating the Dubai penthouse for Louis are part of the same pattern of behavior#and even tho it’s ultimately harmful and will only end badly for armand and Louis’ relationship#idk if armand knows how to not exist that way with someone he loves/desires#all of this also ties into louis and daniel#because of course Armand will lose it over Louis finding connection and interest with someone else aside from him#someone HUMAN no less#and I can see Armand taking out his anger on Daniel as a way of expressing his own frustration at still not being enough for Louis#breaking daniel’s mind in a desperate attempt to understand why this human could reach Louis in ways he couldn’t#not saying any of this to excuse Armand and his behavior obviously (I’m very upset and worried over the trial looming on the horizon)#but I do understand this impulse and how you’ll throw ANYONE under the bus in order to preserve your place with loved ones#it’s all horrifying but unfortunately I empathize#like even if Louis is right to walk out on him when he learns/remembers the truth of what happened to Claudia#I’ll probably still find myself saddened by Armand’s fate because I’ve absolutely been there myself#it’s a tragedy of his own making- his fear and desperation birthing manipulative and controlling behaviors#that ultimately result in your own abandonment#god this fucking show
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bunnihearted · 3 months
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i cant fully control my emotions during a breakdown and then i come out of it and im like oh fuck........ ._.
#bpd#like i dont mean to hurt anyone else with having my breakdown on my vent blog on tumblr...#like the stuff i say isnt aimed at anyone in particular#and it's abt MY feelings which are so confusing i get a headache#my thoughts is my enemy and im such a broken and confused little girl inside fr T-T#but like yeah im sorry for upsetting ppl???#but really i feel so suffocated bc im constantly terrified of saying smth that will upset this or that person#or reblogging the wrong thing and making someone im attached to hate me#like idk.... genuinely my blog is supposed to be a vessel? a tool? smth for me to be able to put my emotions and thoughts down#and try to make sense of them. even when i cant. it really only concerns me. i dont mean to attack or hurt anyone else :/#but i mean i really shouldnt and i shouldve learned this lesson so long ago....#being confused and broken and mentally ill and not knowing or understanding things and being messy and#saying the wrong things or phrasing it incorrectly or anything like that#or like sometimes i have one thought tied to a certain emotion but it's only there in that moment#like when i feel so lonely i could die.. yes i do have kidnapping fantasies. bc i dont.: whatever i dont owe anyone a psychoanalys of mysel#but that doesnt mean i want want to be kidnapped by a stranger who doesnt care abt me... i know that would be awful and traumatizing and no#what i *want*. bc what i desire is love#but like i feel so much pain and just venting abt it or reblogging a post helps me solidify my overwhelming emotions#idk what to say like..... ☹️☹️☹️☹️#i cant even fucking blog or do tumblr right im worthless. and yeah i know i have a victim complex.. sorry 🥲#hmmm. yeah idk what to say like when i have breakdowns i have to get myself thru them without any support#and i dont mean that to attack anyone else.: we're all alone i know.#but idk how to deal w it so i just type it out. its not to attack anyone else its to try to make sense of my emptions i dont understand ☹️#anyway.. maybe i should just accept that im too fucked up and too contradictory for anyone to actually like me#there will always be smth that will make everyone not like me anymore. thats that.#thank u for the time u do give me tho i always appreciate thay#and im sorry i really truly dont want to hurt anyone else#i just dont have .. idk it doesnt matter im sorry for what its worth and if anyone even reads this#i hope not bc i dont want anyone to perceive me and stuff like i dont wanna exist to anyone#and im not on tumblr or post stuff for attention. im just in pain and have nowehrre to put it. im sorry if im lashinf out and hurting other
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aeolianblues · 18 days
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the real fiction in a lot of band AU fics is the amount of time bands seem to have on the evening of a show!
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todayisafridaynight · 4 months
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Religiously i think about one of my twitter mutuals pointing out how aoki's design is subtly asymmetrical while ichiban is more symmetrical
when i think of it, masato's design is fairly symmetrical as well isnt it.....
#snap chats#please no one look at me i shouldve gotten my drink two hours ago#what does it mean .....#i swear my mutual had like. galaxy brain when it came to aoki i swear to god in heaven no one got him like they did#they were also the one that did that glass analysis post i shared some months back#moving on tho...#i guess there is the stipulation that because masato's shirt buttons dont match his shirt like ichi's does the buttons at the top mess it u#but aside from that everything else is pretty even: he has a pair of bangs and while his shirt is patterned its not like. grossly so#the pattern doesnt go particularly one way or the other its obviously just a pattern and the colors arent offensively against each other#on the flipside aoki's hair is more obviously swept to one side and leaving the other side bare#not to mention his tie in general. the 'bulb' part and 'tongue' part even go against each other#as if a diagonal striped tie itself wouldnt be askew to his overall look#again these are very small things to notice but im glad theyre small- it makes sense for a politician's to be subtly incongruent#the glasses are super important to aoki's design too but that's covered int eh glass analysis and isnt about symmetry#idk ... maybe im just waffling on about nothing.. either way i love those posts by my mutual#OH i think of this because i am once again thinking of updating how i draw masato#cause i like the blazer and necklace i gave him BECAUSE of that asymmetry#but now i wonder if thatd go against his design ... so i have to ask 'what underlying message is there for masato to be symmetrical'#i guess- even if he is a creep and a weirdo- he's not. evil? idk ... he hasn't gone totally off the deep end compared to aoki#like compared to what he'd go on to do as aoki he's pretty normal as masato#he is just a guy. who DOES have ties to the yakuza but this aint about that LKCJALKREJVA#he doesnt even like them he just uses them for his convenience 😔#idk. ill prob still draw masato the same tbh LMAO if anything ill just crop his blazer but keep it symmetrical#i guess i cant wonder this TOO much when i give him mismatching rings 💀💀 ill just have fun ig fjaelrvekljv#at the end of the day its never that serious ...... i just gotta draw what makes me chortle. esp for a chara three people care about VJLAEK#but i will wonder ..... <- it is not that deep#ima go bye
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Troye Sivan and Ross Lynch got me out here blushing
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snekdood · 1 month
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remember when it was the norm on here that if someone said they wanted to kill themselves, people would try to convince them not to and anything other than doing that was seen as fucked and wrong by default no matter what?
yeah.... i miss that
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burningfeathersx · 2 months
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[.ooc.]
i dont think lucifer would run a blog
im sure he views content and uses an empty url to follow people he cares about but
the more i think about it the less i think he like
does social media as an active participant
like he is less likely to communicate online snort
just kinda looking into the camera because he rather say shit in person than from behind a screen. particularly with anything of concequence.
like
meet him in the ball pit or perish he doesn't have the time
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duckduckngoose · 6 months
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Can my dnd character PLEASE stop evading every attempt at me trying to either develop her backstory or just anything
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maitaitiu · 6 months
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for you, i'd watch paint dry OCxCanon week 2024 Day 7: "so... it's a date, then?" Pairing type: romantic Canon Character: Skyla (she/her) OC: Fern (she/her) Fandom: Pokemon Wordcount: 1776
AO3 link
CWS: mentions of hospitals & needles
Synopsis: Skyla finally has a day off from both her jobs. It's sorely needed; she loves her work, but she's wiped out! She's looking forward to a relaxing evening, and then a fun day-long date with her girlfriend, Fern. Though, Skyla has forgotten that Fern has a hospital appointment the same day as her day off.
Skyla stretched her arms high above her head as she kicked the front door of her apartment closed. She was so glad to be done with work today.
Sure, she loved flying. And she loved doing Gym stuff. But man, it was all tiring. And she was thrilled to finally have a day off from both of them tomorrow.
Not only that. But she could finally spend a whole day with her girlfriend! Fern was currently sitting on the couch in the living room, slippers kicked off onto the floor and legs pulled onto the cushion. She was reading something on a tablet, though she looked completely bored.
Skyla threw her bag and coat into the cubby by the front door, and walked into the lounge- where she then dramatically flopped onto the couch and lay her head on her girlfriend’s legs.
“Hiya, cutie. You come here often?” Skyla grinned, drawling her voice out to exaggerate how tired she was.
“Now and again,” Fern’s reply wasn’t as enthusiastic, or happy, as expected, so Skyla sat up.
“You good?” she asked, “What’s on your mind?”
Fern looked up from her tablet, “Oh. Nothing interesting. Just health stuff.”
Skyla raised her eyebrows.
“I’ve got my infusion appointment tomorrow.” Fern said, frowning, “It’s just… boring.”
It took Skyla a minute to remember what those were. Fern only needed that kind of appointment every two months or so, and they’d only been dating a year… and its infrequency led to it being not something they really discussed much at all. But she did remember, after a minute or two of thinking.
Well, some of it, at least.
“Afterwards, then… how about we go watch a movie or something? Or… go for a run… or a walk- or we could go bowling..? It’s my first day off in ages tomorrow, so I wanna treat you anyway!”
Fern smiled slightly, but it didn’t quite reach her eyes.
“I forgot about your day off.” She said quietly, “I’m sorry, Sky.”
“Why?”
“It takes like, four hours. And it’s an hour to drive to the hospital, and an hour back… That’s already six hours… four of them I’m spending with a needle in my arm and under fluorescent lights that give me a headache.” She turned off her tablet and looked away, shoulders dropped down in obvious guilt, “I just don’t think I’d be up for anything outside of a nap before or after that.”
Skyla practically felt herself deflate. So much for having a nice, super fun day off adventuring with her girlfriend. She stayed quiet on the couch, and said nothing as Fern walked out of the living room to see what they had in the kitchen for dinner.
And also, evidently, to avoid the fact that both of them were now feeling bad.
With a sigh, Skyla lay down on the sofa, and stared up at the ceiling. She couldn’t move her day off, and even if she could, she’d worked so hard today that the thought of going into work tomorrow was nauseating- no matter how much she enjoyed it.
But it wasn’t like Fern could move her appointment. So… what?
Skyla squeezed her eyes tightly shut to think for a minute.
Did they just accept that this was an irritating and unchangeable situation?
No. There must be some way for them to spend time together tomorrow.
Skyla picked herself up from the couch and resolutely walked into the kitchen, where Fern was reading the expiration date on a jar of pasta sauce.
“Should we just order pizza, d’you think?” Fern asked, “Or maybe Thai food? I don’t know if this is still good to eat…”
“It looks fine to me. Buuuut I could totes eat a Massaman curry… Mm.”
With not even a further glance to the jar of sauce before she shoved it back in the cupboard, Fern nodded. “Let’s do that. I’m craving tom yum soup already. Geez…”
She pulled out her cellphone to order the food- but Skyla quickly stopped her.
“I’ll pay.” She said, impulsively, “Also. Can we talk about tomorrow?”
Fern blinked, not really letting any expression through, which was most unusual, “Sure.”
And then she dialled their favourite Thai restaurant and placed an order for delivery.
Skyla sat down on one of the breakfast bar stools while Fern ordered, giving the occasional thumbs up whenever Fern asked about things like spice level or any appetisers or whatever. They practically always ordered the same things, so it was pretty easy to communicate the order silently as Fern spoke on the phone.
“Forty minutes,” Fern said as she snapped her flip-phone shut, “You should go get something more comfy on before then, hm?”
“Are you thinking… pyjama dinner and a movie?” Skyla asked, eyebrows raised.
“You bet. Go on. Go go go!” Skyla laughed as her girlfriend pushed her down the corridor toward the bedroom.
She took a quick shower, let her hair hang loose- still wet- and changed into her softest pyjamas. And then returned to the lounge with a blanket in hand, where Fern was once again curled up on the couch, looking at her tablet.
The thing was, showers were bizarrely good for thinking up ideas. And Skyla had one, now.
“Are people allowed to come with you to your appointment tomorrow?” she asked, as she sat down, and covered both of them with the blanket, “Like… a friend or a family member?”
“Oh. Yeah. One person, I think.” Fern nodded, and put the tablet away again, and reached to pet her patrat who was curled up on the armrest.
“Do you… normally bring anyone with you?” Skyla prompted after a moment.
“No. I’ve… always just gone alone.” Fern sighed, and pulled her patrat into her lap, “Why? Are you offering to come?”
“Yeah! I know you said it’s super boring and stuff, and the lights are gross, buuuuut…” she leaned onto her girlfriend’s shoulder, “Maybe I can help make that less boring! I can bring you an eye mask to shield you from the lights… and snacks… and I can give you massages…”
Fern snorted, “You’re not a masseuse.”
“Just an idea!” Skyla insisted, “I dunno, maybe it’d be a bit less boring if you had some company?”
She waited nervously as Fern thought in silence for a minute.
“Well… I mean… If you’d like to come…” Fern said quietly, with a tiny smile on her face, “It would be quite nice. It is really boring though.”
“That’s okay! I have plenty of gossip from work I can tell you… and play-by-plays of Gym battles… and you can tell me how it’s all going in Pinwheel Forest…” Skyla sighed happily and let herself fully lie down on Fern’s lap, biting back a laugh when Fern yelped in reaction to her hair being cold and damp, “Y’know. Hanging out. Moral support. And I can drive us home, so you can nap on the way back!”
“Sure. Okay.” Fern rolled her eyes, and pushed Skyla off her lap, “I appreciate it.”
“Yes!” Skyla exclaimed, as the doorbell rang, “So… it’s a date?!”
“The world’s most boring date ever, sure.” Fern said, getting to her feet.
“Still a date!” Skyla asserted, racing after her to the door.
“True.”
They paid for and received their food from the usual friendly delivery driver, and tipped him generously, as always, and then returned once more to the lounge- where they channel flicked until they found some trashy soap drama to watch, curled up together on the couch under a blanket, their pokemon lounging around the room as well, and eating some of their favourite foods.
Eventually, Fern fell asleep on Skyla’s shoulder, and she took the opportunity to quickly read up on the process of the infusion tomorrow. Where they’d have to go, what they were allowed to bring (Skyla made a list on the back of her hand of snacks and other stuff to pack before they set off), as well as the type of medicine Fern was getting (infliximab) and what sort of side effects it could have (the most common seemed to be nausea and headaches, so she also made a note to bring a heat pad and some painkillers. Not ibuprofen, since Fern couldn’t take those…) and also, she debated the possibility of sneaking off at some point to run to a store and buy Fern a gift… Would that be necessary? Would she think it was patronising? Maybe… It’d still be a nice gesture though, right?
It was already a lot to think through, and she wasn’t even the one needing the medicine. No wonder the whole process exhausted Fern so much, who was already more prone to fatigue due to the very condition she needed the medication for.
Still. Fern would be back to her normal, vibrant self in a couple of days. And if she wasn’t, well… Skyla wasn’t a quitter. She loved her girlfriend. That was that. If Fern was tired and sad for longer than usual, then Skyla would be there no matter what. And she’d do everything she could to make her feel even just a little better.
A date didn’t have to be a fancy meal or an eight-mile hike. It didn’t have to be bowling, or sports, or a walk on the beach. A date could be a nice evening in watching trashy TV, eating your favourite takeaway; a date could be an afternoon spent in a hospital room, braiding your girlfriend’s hair, and shielding her eyes from the harsh lights as she tried to nap away the hours with a needle in her arm.
For Fern, Skyla would spend a whole day doing the dullest paperwork ever if she had to. Fern, who would run a bath with floral bubbles for whenever Skyla said she’d had a rough day at work. Fern, who would personally beat the daylights out of anyone who was cruel toward pokemon. Fern, who felt her emotions at a hundred-and-twenty percent capacity all the time, and who listened intently whenever Skyla or someone else spoke, even if she didn’t care. Fern, who’s body was rebelling against her constantly and had to explain it to everyone she interacted with, and was so clearly exhausted by it all, but still kept going because she had no choice. Fern, who was asleep on Skyla’s shoulder, a tiny bit of sauce from her Pad Thai staining her cheek.
Skyla put her arm around her girlfriend and squeezed her with a hug.
She had always hated sitting still. But it wasn’t so bad with the woman she loved at her side.
Not at all, actually.
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numbr-1fabfantasyfan · 11 months
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if he posts anything ab sa awareness or smt i will fukn riot HYPOCRITICAL ASS BITCH
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arolesbianism · 3 months
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Guys why is rain world so good (<- rewatched some scenes and teared up on all of them)
#rat rambles#rain posting#god man. holy shit. fuckkkkkk#rain world may not be one of my token big interests but god does it just hit me so fucking hard whenever I do engage with it#I also think after rewatching some stuff that my general takes on how rain world's world works have shifted a smidge#which is also giving me some more ideas for saint hcs#I feel like the biggest thing Im seeing differently now is the concept that the saint has no beginning or end#one big theme of rain world is the way that all cycles eventually come to an end#societies iterators and even the lives of the animals that wander about#theyre trapped but within these cycles they still move forward and eventually fade just like everything else#but the saint doesnt. they never can. in that way they are a paradox#for when even time itself eventually fades what becomes of the being who will never be allowed to slow in their decent?#overlapping onto themself infinitely until what is and isn't them becomes irrelevant#have they lived many times or were they ever even alive to begin with?#at the end of the day they will never know. its a peace they wont ever find#as they are simply a lil guy who is stuck in a real mind boggling situation#anyways thanks pebbles dialogue for helping me get a better grasp on saint stuff have fun being dead buddy#it also makes me feel even worse for the echos because theyre likely in similar positions#not the exact same given Im sure none of them had the powers to fly and ascend ppl but still#in my minds eye tho theyre more themselves than saint is#for better or for worse#the rest of the echos are stationary. unable to move forwards or back#while the saint continues to spiral onwards and onwards in ways that break the very core of this universe#or smth like that idk. Im just rambling abt nonsense at this point lol#but yeah I imagine the sain to be both trapped and stretched across time#most things exists whinin cycles of cycles but the saint takes that concept to the extreme#most things much more so develop and change as time moves forward but the saint kind of just is#but like. is a lot. like there's a lot of them. but that them is stretched like super thin#they overlap themself and keep stretching to infinity#and with that sort of overlap it makes sense that in what conscious state they do have they simply experience each overlap eternally
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bunnihearted · 8 months
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📓🕯️🐇🖤pt.2
#only 30 tags lol i ran out... so furthermore#we only get one life. im gonna try as much as i can to enjoy the little moments. nd to not give up on myself nd my life#i will die one day anyway. why rush it. i'll enjoy as many books and as many walks and songs and tv shows as possible#if i get a loan nd have more money i wanna bleach my hair nd dye my hair green#and later this year i think i might change my name#it was the name i wanted to change to from the beginning. but i was in such a bad headspace i just picked eden at random#i do kinda like it now nd im attached to it but i more feel like this other name actually is me. my birth name nd my current name dont feel#really right. so maybe. i havent decided yet. like i rlly dont know. im also attached to this name for some other reason. like it's who i am#to a person i rlly like and if i change... will i be anything to them? i cant put it into words but that makes me hesitate#but it's unhealthy to stay attached to someone i cant truly have even if i want to. so i mean. idk im just weird abt it#but i do kinda wanna change my name (to embla. my mom wanted to give me that name but my dad was like nooo >.<) i am not 100% sure tho so#when i've been getting used to going to school nd working out at the gym. nd after my surgery nd i have more energy#i will try to face my avpd and try apps for making friends. there r two apps where u can find new girl friends!! maybe i can try that#also like i've never tried apps but i think maaaaaybe i can use bumble to try to find friends and women to date. potentially. idk.....#rn it's hard for me to think in those terms bc. i mean i am hung up on someone!!!! i cant evwn imagine dating or being intimate w anyone els#sometimes i feel like.. they're the only person i've ever felt like it'd even be possible. who i'd event want to do that w#not only physically but emotionally. so ig it's even harder to let go bc im so scared i will never feel like that w anyone else#but i rlly need to try to make the most of whatever life i have. the world will collapse soon anyway#that makes me even more sad that i cant be w who i wanna be w nd do what i wanna do but#all pain will all be completely descimated eventually. it's not forever bc life isnt forever#i've just never felt this before. like i want smth to be real so bad but if it happened once surely it can happen again? right?#i wont spend my life alone without intimacy and love and comfort nd support nd understanding right???? :o hope not#im still so sad nd exhausted rn. nothing in my life is working nd theres no repreive nd no help#it gets sooo hard to endure everything sometimes when everything just keeps piling up and gets so heavy it feels like im drowning#nd atm i dont feel like i have any anchor. nothing that keeps me grounded nd im just floating away nd im constantly being overwhelmed by my#feelings nd emotions. im like a stupid little kid who dont understand how to handle what im feeling. or make rational decisions#i feel so ... stupid and useless. i dont know what im doing. i have no idea. i have no compass. its so scary
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tragedykery · 1 year
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this may feel sacrilegious coming from tuser maileesque but sometimes. I think about maizula
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I definitely get being torn about TOH finale bc it was amazing in many areas and the crew worked so hard to get it all together so if there was something you didn’t like about it it’s a bit of a guilty feeling and whatnot, while also understanding that they couldn’t do all they wanted and stuff. I’m mostly just glad we can come together and celebrate this amazing show.
But I do find it annoying if someone goes “well if you didnt like this thing you just don’t get the themes and purposes” like. sometimes I do get what they were going for but it wasn’t to my liking ok. It having meaning does not mean it must be liked, and also maybe it doesn’t have a meaning, maybe it was just because Disney cut it short so they needed to wrap it up early and couldn’t elaborate. It’s ok to admit that.
Most of all I’m just so glad the crew was able to get it done after being sabotaged through everything
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