#idk what it’ll be at by the end of the summer but almost definitely in that range

[designernishiki]

in a couple months im gonna be asked what I did over the summer and I’m just gonna sit there unresponsive because I don’t want to admit to playing between 250-300 hours of yakuza 0

[braineater444]

“To Be Better”

Big Brother!Yoshida x Gender Neutral Reader

(Tw: Sexual Abuse, Rape, Incest, Mild Smut, Mental Health, Suicidal Ideation)

A/N: I told myself I would finish this today and I did against my better judgment. This is not fully proofread and a bit different in comparison to other things I’ve written. Not heavy on the smut but definitely heavy. Idk. This isn’t good. Goodnight <3

Your older brother Yoshida is the brightest star to ever shine in your family. He got into all of the top universities (and every school he applied to for that matter) he’s smart, he’s attractive and everyone loves him to pieces, even those he’s only said one word to. He’s that type of guy. Too charismatic for his own good. A revolving door of people interested in being with him. Not a single flaw on his pretty skin.

Then, there’s you. You’re born second, but that doesn’t make you any where near close to second to him. Somehow, even with there being only two of you, you fall further down. You’re not placing in a race with him. You graduated two years after him, but no one from your extended family showed up like they did for him. You had a few friends, but were otherwise known as Hirofumi’s younger sibling. Your existence felt like an inconsequential blip when you were so eclipsed by him in every aspect of anything you did. He is the sun, but to say you’re the moon would be a lie.

So, it felt nice to graduate. To leave the school where every one knew you as a his shadow and the comparisons never ended. It felt nice to go to a community college where no one knew you and forge your own identity.

Even with him out of the house two years before, you still weren’t as free from him as you have been recently. You’re healing as of late. His winter break visit has come and gone and you’re getting better. This summer will be better. There’s just you and sure, you still live with your parents who always compared you to him, but now your lives have almost completely diverged. They have to, after all the work you’ve put in to getting better about being his shadow.

Of course, it’s not as simple as him having disappeared at university forver, though. It cant be your happily ever after. He comes home over his breaks and this one is no different.

The summer air is hot. It’s unpleasant and almost inescapable. There’s three popsicle sticks on your desk and the ceiling fan of your room is going as fast as it can go. It’s working desperately to cool you down with its gentle whirring, but still, you’re sticky with a light cast of sweat as you lay silently on your bed in wait.

You know he’s here. His voice flows proudly all through the house as he greets your parents and asks where you are and why you haven’t come to see him. You can hear him padding down the hall. Your brother has a distinct walk. It’s heavy and light all at once, like he’s waltzing his way to your door. A distinct feeling of dread punctuates each and every step.

As the door to your room swings open, you’re greeted by that same gut punch of a smile that you hadn’t been unfortunate enough to see since winter. This time it’ll be longer. The summer is too long.

“What?” It’s not really a question. Just something to make him go away.

“What?” He repeats back to you. “You’re not excited to see me?” Hirofumi… his voice is like silk; like he’s got it all figured out. It’s no wonder he’s got everyone fooled.

…

Usually it’s the summer heat that keeps you up all night, but tonight it’s him. You can’t see him, but you know he’s there and for that reason you haven’t left your room all day. His presence is an ache in your brain and the dryness of your mouth. This was supposed to be easier.

For the first time since he’s been back, you walk as quietly as possible out of your room praying that he isn’t awake. When you pass his room there’s no light coming from under the closed door and not a sound to be heard.

He’s asleep. Thank god.

You take a breath of relief and hurry yourself through the house, but as you round the corner into the kitchen the lights are on and he’s there. Closing the cabinets after putting up one last dish. And there it is. That sickening smile as he spots you.

“You didn’t eat dinner with us.”

You ignore him and pull open the refrigerator. All of the foods been neatly wrapped up and nicely stacked in small containers. You don’t check them to see what’s inside. Instead, you pick at a bunch of grapes and shovel them into your mouth one by one. There’s nothing to be said. You’re dealing with this well enough.

The grapes are ice cold and pop deliciously in your mouth. This is the best thing to happen to you all day. You needed this. You deserve this. Until, it’s interrupted by a large hand on your shoulder.

You stiffen.

“Don’t-” You turn and smack his hand off of your shoulder.

“Why are you acting like that?” He asks. He’s trapping you between his body and the ice cold inside of the refrigerator. He’s so close. Too close. You can smell him. He smells so fucking good. It’s sweet like fresh cut grass and natural like the wind traveling over the sea. It’s sickening. He’s making you nauseous by being in your space. A headache is forming. He shouldn’t be this close.

Your hand shoots out between the two of you and pushes at his chest before you even realize you’ve moved. You retract your hand like you were burned. “Move.” It’s quiet but stern. He doesn’t budge in the slightest. A look of confusion paints his face.

“What is your problem?” He steels himself.

For a second you almost believe him. You almost believe he’s truly lost and he doesn’t know why you’re acting like this towards him.

“You were fine when I came back over the break in winter.”

Right. Winter. You don’t even want to think about it.

He pulls you away from the refrigerator with a tight grip on your arm. You here it click closed and your brain stops working at the sound. He’s been treating you like this forever. Like a rag doll. For a second you let it happen. You have half a mind to let him do what he’s always done, but with the better half you pull away from him. His hand feels like it should’ve left burn marks in every spot he’d touched.

“Leave me alone.” You want to scream but it comes out as a hushed cry. Your nails dig into his forearm and he lets you go. You stumble back into the counter and you don’t even feel the pain that accompanies it.

“You don’t like me anymore?” His smile is confused. His eyebrows are furrowed. He pretends not to know what’s wrong.

…

You’re dealing with this the best way you know how.

He’s not here, in your room, but somehow he’s everywhere. His smell lingers in there air. Somehow it feels like his hand is still wrapped around your arms. You can’t get rid of him even in the quiet of your own room.

You lock the door. You unlock it. You lock it again.

You flick the light on. You flick it off. You flick it on again. You leave it off.

You start to try to lay back down, but you can’t bring yourself to touch your bed. Not with Hirofumi all over you.

The only solution is a shower.

The water burns just right against your thigh as you step in. You needed this. You weren’t ready to see him again.

Your body is trembling. How long have you been like that? Are there tears in your eye? You can feel your throat tightening up and wetness streaming down your face. Why are you crying? He didn’t do anything to you.

Maybe you shouldn’t be treating him like this. You liked him in the winter. You liked what happened then. You’re fooling yourself into thinking you’re the victim. After all these years, you’re not the victim.

Like a bullet in the chest it hits you all at once. So many years of him fight to the forefront of your thoughts.

Even as you scrub your skin you can feel his hands all over you. You’re sure the soap smells like him. You hold the soap to your nose and the thought goes away. It doesn’t smell like him.

You think about the winter. Your unlocked door. An invite for him to come in. You scrub at your skin.

You remember the heat of his body against yours. When you would beg him to stop. You scrub.

His hands gripping at your chest. Your quiet discomfort as you let him. The tears that rolled down your cheeks and the the way he kissed them away. You’ll clean him off of you even if your skin turns raw.

You can’t breathe. The tightness in your throat is getting worse. You’re sure you’re bawling. You want this to end. To go away. You need to go away.

Your knees buckles under you and when they crack against the shower floor the world becomes clear again. You can hear yourself sobbing. You can feel that the waters too hot against your skin. It’s too much.

A knock on the door comes as you rush to turn the water off.

“Are you okay?” Hirofumi’s voice lingers on the other side. You can smell him again. “Y/N~” He sings your name out with the beat of his second round of knocks at the door. “Do you want me to come in there?”

You’re still crying. You can’t catch your breathe. Your pleads for him not to come in are stuck in your throat.

You hear him say your name again. Then, the door starts to inch open. He can’t do this. He can’t. He can’t. He can’t.

“GO AWAY!” You scream out before you knew you could speak again. The door clicks shut. Footsteps sound further and further until they disappear. Relief. You melt in to the wall of the tub. He’s gone.

There’s no telling how long you stayed there; a mess of sopping wet hair and skin, but you eventually pull yourself together and rush to get your pajamas on. The long pants. The long sleeves. They tug against your wet skin and make you sweat already.

You look in the mirror; into your bloodshot eyes.

You can never brush your teeth enough. It’s like his tongue is always in your mouth. The taste of his breath lingers. The inside of your mouth feels like his. Too much like his. Your lips are so chewed up trying escape the feeling, they crack even more when you brush your teeth. You brush until your gums bleed. Until your mouth feels as raw as your skin. Until the taste of iron replaces him. Until you can sleep at night. The taste of him will come back. It always does.

…

Your parents don’t sit down for breakfast unless he’s around. Your mom doesn’t cook unless it’s for him. You don’t exist outside of him.

You push your food around your plate and tune them out. He’s sitting across from you and you’re not looking up unless you have to. You’re not hungry this morning. You don’t want to be here.

“Why don’t you want to learn how yo drive?”

The question sounds pointed at you. You stop, to listen again.

“You know…” You stop hearing his voice, but you’re sure he’s still talking. You keep looking down at your plate. “…really, I’m your big brother I should.” You can hear that fucking smile in his voice.

“That would be great, wouldn’t it, honey?” Your moms hand rubs soothingly over your thigh. You almost get the urge to cry again, but you can’t. “Hirofumi could be a great person to teach you?”

You look at her, confused.

“He can teach you how to drive. You should really learn. And maybe look at his new car.”

“It’s really nice.” Your dad cuts in.

He has a new car.

“It’d be great. To make new memories and stuff, right?” Hirofumi looks so endearing. The sun coming in through the window surrounds his body in soft morning light. Of course, he’s glowing. He casts a shadow over your breakfast plate.

“I’ll learn to drive on my own time.” You stuff your mouth with eggs.

Your mother insists that you let Hirofumi teach you. She’s like that. He’s her favorite. He does everything right the first time.

You leave breakfast early and leave them to their golden child.

You lock your door. You unlock it. You lock it again. You check the handle. It’s locked.

Your pajamas are suffocating you. It’s only going to get hotter from this point in the day, but you can’t change. You turn your ceiling fan on. You can breath.

You open a book and try to forget.

By the afternoon, the house falls silent. You leave your room and check all around the place. For each room you flick the lights on and of again and again. Not a soul. Tension relieves itself in places you didn’t know you had it. After checking all the locks, you sprawl out on the couch. Let them be gone forever.

…

You’re burning up. You’re sweating. You have a headache. The tv is on, but there’s some other noise. The couch suddenly feels too small.

“Do you want to go in my room?” Hands tap your cheeks to wake you. Your eyes struggle to open. Your mouth doesn’t move. Again. “Do you want to go in my room?” His face is far above yours, there’s brightness in his eyes, but they remain pitch black. His bangs are still too low. “It’s cooler in there. You’re sweating a lot. C’mon.”

He grabs you. Hoists you in to his arms and you latch on to him. You let him carry you. He loves to carry you. You’re so easy. So so easy. Why are you letting him do this.

“Hiro-”

Nothing.

“Hirofumi…”

“Hm?”

“Please take me to my room. I don’t want to do this.”

“It was fine a couple moths ago. Wasn’t it?”

You shake your head. You never liked it. That time you thought if you tried to enjoy it you’d hurt less. If you finally smiled and gave him what he wanted willingly it wouldn’t be as bad as all of the times before. It worked in the moment, but like every time before it came back to haunt you. You can’t do it again, but you don’t argue.

You let him lay you down on his bed. You go limp. You can’t run. You’ve never been able to stop this.

You think you say his name out loud, but if you do, he doesn’t answer. You ask where your mom’s at. Nothing. Your pajama pants are off. You hear yourself say stop. His hand smooths over your underwear.

There’s a moment of darkness and suddenly you’re both naked. You’re pushing at his muscles. His mouth is leaving wet kisses down your body. You swear you’re begging him to end this. There’s something of a cry for help in there. He can’t do this again.

“You wanted this last time, remember?” He breathes over your sex and drags his tongue across. Your body reacts as if you were struck by electricity, but you feel nothing. There’s just a strange wetness between your legs.

He can’t seem to remember the times before when you said no. All the times that came before the winter. When his hands traveled down in to your uniform. When you told him he didn’t need to kiss you before his graduation speech for good luck. When you said you didn’t want to know what he’d taste like. There were so many rejections, but he just can’t be a good brother.

He can only remember when you begged for him at the park last winter. When you let him climb in your bed and rub himself against the curve of your ass. When you licked his semen off the palm of your hand and kissed him hungrily. He can only remember last winter.

You were so scared. You thought you could face your demons head on.

He’s inside you. He’s so deep inside you. His tongue lick’s at the salty tears and sweat on your cheeks. His lips interlock with yours and you don’t kiss back. Not this time. You feel nothing and everything. Every vein dragging in and out of you. Every fingernail digging into your waist. The muscle in his chest where your hands aren’t pushing any more. Every breath he steals from you. But you don’t feel it.

You’re trapped eye to eye under him. His bedside lamp is dim, but you can see his face so close to yours. He’s tearing you apart from the inside. You have to be dying. You want to die.

“Hiro… I’m going to kill myself.” You manage between tears, broken moans and unstable breaths. “Please stop. I’m going to die. I’m going to kill myself.” It all pours out of your mouth like a flood.

“No. I’ll take care of you,” He says as he lays kisses along your throat.

“No. I’ll die.” You sniffle. “I’ll just die. I promise. I can’t do this. Please stop.” You might be screaming. There’s no way for you to tell. He’s slamming in to you harder. You can see it. You can’t feel it, but you know it hurts. Then it all stops. You can’t see anymore. There’s nothing. Again.

He’s there. Laying on your stomach when you come to. You feel sticky. Like your body’s covered in slime. Gross. Like you’re wrapped in spiderwebs. Like your brother’s been inside of you. Like this has been going on for as long as you can remember.

You try to push him off of you. You’re still naked. You don’t want your pajamas back anyway. You just want the shower. You push at his head and try to slide your body from under him. His scalp is wet with sweat.

You just want to shower. He won’t budge. His smell is seeping deeper into your skin by the second.

He turns to face you.

“Mom and dad are out all night. We have time.”

You give up. You’ll never be clean again.

[shootingpuckgoss]

I do wonder how it’s gonna go. I don’t think she has an actual job tbh despite what others say. She has a website (I’m not gonna share it bc her # is on there) but it’s all artsy and stuff. Either she has a job that’s part time that she literally goes to bc she’s bored bc she’s a millionaire she doesn’t need to work.

Anyway I wonder what’s gonna happen bc Jack seems super happy I’m just wondering when/if it all goes to shit. Maybe this summer? I wonder if it’s gonna either go down in the summer or later.

Idk going through surgery is very hard no matter how small the surgery is (not that I’m saying his was small but let’s say compared to knee replacement) so I wonder if they’re going to make it through that or what’s gonna happen. If she’s gonna keep flying out to mich. is he gonna stay here.

Let’s say she does have a full time job like anons say. I don’t think there just gonna let her take a week or so off multiple times during the summer. Jack and sienna broke it off after 8/9 months together bc of long distance

What’s going to happen if she can’t keep going to much. Olivia is a model she can stay in Vancouver weeks/months at a time js.

Anyone have any other opinions or stuff love to hear what y’all think( omg this is so long I’m sorry)

No it’s totally fine anon! I love these long ones they give me so much info - if you’d like to share the website with me privately I’d love that

But I agree, being realistic there’s a point that it is gonna end it’s just a matter of time and how it will happen - because the man is 22 and in the nhl, realistically he still has so much more people to meet in life

Jack seems happy but he does majority of the time and has in previous relationships so I don’t see a difference there for it being something more there Jack is like that with almost any girl I’ve ever seen him with and in no way am I comparing but I’m trying to be real here.

The surgery is questionable too, now it could potentially cause trouble I’d assume with everything and what not but if it’s not this summer it goes down it makes me wonder if it’ll be before the season starts or maybe a little bit after

I feel like distance won’t be a huge problem but it definitely would be other things like the season or it just working out because I just have a feeling. Based off what everyone’s said she’s really not nice and a Zionist + they seem to be moving super fast which never seems to end well… lol

I hope you guys can send in ur opinions on this because it’s interesting

[z-exo-l]

Cabin Fever First Impression

Sweet Juice is pretty good. I love how much I got to hear Dosie, the choreo looks absurdly complex, and I want that candlestick phone in the mv! It’ll probably be a grower.

Intro: Save Me is quintessential PK; it’s dark, but it’s got a seductive flair. Very cool.

T4ke has a lot of similarities to Fire Flower to me. I’m not mad at it though; the r&b sound is really vibing w the early 00’s mood I’ve been in lately. The melody is nice too, and I’m quite curious about the lyrics.

Autopilot is sounding 80’s right off the bat. It’s like a more mild Maniac by Michael Sembello. Ohh but the chorus is a bit more modern; I like the combination. Not bad.

(Agit) Oooh! A very classic pop track so far. Ohh vocals at the chorus. This is fun. There are parts where they’re almost talk-singing, and it’s an interesting contrast to how upbeat the instrumental is. Definitely the danc-ey track of the album.

So Far So Good is the last one. They’re really bringing the…idk what they’re called musically but it’s almost like a yelp? Anyway there’s plenty of those on this album. But I like this song, it feels a little more like Summer Rain? Gentle but groovy. And Swan is a highlight for SURE but that’s not surprising; the girl’s pipes are excellent. A really pleasant song to end on.

I wouldn’t necessarily say there’s a track that’s standing out to me right away, but there’s plenty of time to grow attached. And the first impression is much better than Memem from last year. Overall another solid effort from the girls.

[sunkissedpages]

instead of you [part fifteen]

pairing: [best friend’s brother] tom holland x college!reader

summary: you didn’t expect to spend your summer pretending to be your best friend’s girlfriend- then again, you didn’t expect to fall for your best friend’s brother, either.

warnings: swearing, alcohol consumption

word count: 1.7k

series masterlist

Don’t tell Sam. Sam. SAM.

“Shit.”

You had to fix this in a matter of seconds. Should you slap him? Act like nothing happened? Pretend you were drunker than you actually were and play dumb?

“Wait, you’re not Sam?” you squinted your eyes like you were trying to see who was in front of you, acting like you were too drunk to remember who you were with. “Oh my god.”

“Y/n, I’m so sorry,” Tom tried. 

“I-” you didn’t know how to respond. “Why did you do that?”

He ran a hand through his hair and shook his head. “I don’t know, it didn’t mean anything!” You’d be lying if you told yourself that didn’t sting a little. If he didn’t have any sort of feelings for you, why would he kiss you? “I wasn’t thinking.”

“No, you weren’t.”

“I’m sorry,” he repeated. “Please don’t tell my brother.”

“You want me to lie to my boyfriend?”

“I mean, is it lying if you just don’t mention it?”

“It’s a lie of omission- are you really going to debate me about philosophy right now?”

“Then yes, I do want you to lie to your boyfriend because if he finds out he’ll never speak to me again.”

“You realize what kind of position that puts me in?”

He sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Yes.”

You couldn’t even think straight. Feelings of confusion, panic, anger, and regret fought for control of your conscience. “What if someone had seen us? Taken a picture of us? You’re a public fucking figure, Tom. That could’ve put your career at risk.” “Don’t you think I know that?” he growled. “I don’t need you to lecture me on how stupid it was.”

“You’re an asshole,” you scoffed.

“I know.”

You stood from the table to leave, hoping he wouldn’t follow you, but he called after you, your name echoing in your ears like a warning. Reluctantly, you turned back to face him with a bitter taste on your tongue.

“You won’t tell him, right?”

You stared him down for a moment, watching nerves etch themselves onto his features before answering. “You don’t have to worry about it.”

It was a promise you didn’t want to make, but you felt like you had no other choice. You hadn’t just broken the ‘no flirting’ rule, you’d blown straight past it into completely uncharted territory. And technically Tom had been the one to initiate, you hadn’t kissed him back, but you couldn’t say you hadn’t felt something when he did. 

You had never lied to Sam before- at least not on this scale. You felt sick to your stomach, and it had nothing to do with the alcohol. 

You almost didn’t want to go back to your room. You urged the elevator to go as slow as possible as you checked your appearance in the reflective wall. The tarnished gold was smudged with handprints, but you were still able to make out your ruined lipstick. You weren’t sure it had been messed up sometime during dinner, or if it was Tom’s doing but you couldn’t take a chance. You used your thumb to wipe away the evidence as the intercom on the elevator let out a ding to let you know you’d reached your floor.

With a shaky breath you pushed yourself into the hallway and forced yourself to put one foot in front of the other to walk to your room. You didn’t have a key, so you had to knock. You half-hoped Sam was already asleep, even if it meant you’d have to spend the night in the hallway. 

But as luck would have it he was still up and he opened the door seconds later. He was definitely out of it, blinking at you to put you in focus. 

“There you are,” he said tiredly, rubbing one of his eyes with his hand. “I was wondering when you’d come up.”

“I hope I didn’t keep you up,” you apologized as you breezed past him into the room. 

“Nah, I was just messing around.”

A lie, you knew, but you let it slide knowing you were keeping a much bigger secret. He was already dressed for bed in his boxers and one of your t-shirts and his hair was wet from a shower. 

“Are you okay?” he asked, noticing your anxious energy.

You nodded. “I had too much to drink.”

“Ah, me too, I think. Come take a shower. It’ll help.” 

You took his advice and tried to sober up in the shower, letting the cold water run over your bare skin until you were shivering. When it didn’t make you feel any better you turned off the faucet completely and dried off, wrapping a towel around your body and sitting on the edge of the tub. 

“Y/n?” came Sam’s muffled voice from the other side of the door. 

“Yeah?”

“Are you sure you’re okay?” 

You sighed. Why did he have to know you better than you knew yourself? You pushed yourself up from the tub and opened the door. 

“I had like three more shots after you left,” you mumbled.

The color drained from his face as he took in this additional information and he frowned. “Jesus, I thought I was drunk. Do you feel sick?”

“Not yet.”

“Okay, well let’s go to bed,” he urged. His accent was always thicker when he was drunk, and in a funny way it sounded like home, like all of those Friday nights back on campus. 

Sam gave you space to change into your clothes for bed and crawled under the covers to wait for you. You dressed yourself, hung your towel in the bathroom, and shut off the main light before feeling your way through the darkness over to the bed. 

You managed to get your drunk ass in bed without tripping which you considered to be a miracle. Sam slung his arm across your stomach as soon as you settled on the mattress and pulled you against his hip. You tensed underneath his touch, but he didn’t seem to notice. 

You couldn’t relax no matter how hard you tried, and sleep taunted you for hours, hovering just out of your reach. 

Sam’s alarm woke you from restless dreaming some hours later, when the sun had barely brushed the horizon. 

You groaned and rolled over onto your stomach, burying your face in your pillow. Your head was pounding and you didn’t even want to think about facing Tom. The simple motion of rolling over had made you nauseous and you knew that standing up was going to be a whole nother ordeal. 

“Come on, love,” Sam said, nudging you with his knee. He was already sitting up, rolling the tension out of his neck from a night on the stiff mattress. “We gotta be downstairs in a few minutes.”

Tears pricked at the corners of your eyes and you felt pathetic. You didn’t have the strength to be around Tom today, especially with Sam right there.

“Don’t feel good,” you moaned.

“We’re all hungover,” Sam sighed. “We’re not even doing that much walking today.”

You turned your head enough for him to see the tears running down your cheeks and he pursed his lips, expression turning worried. 

“Oh.”

“Can you make something up?” you pleaded. 

He nodded. “I’ll tell them you have a fever or something.”

You swallowed your shame and squeezed your eyes shut, whispering thanks into his shirt. Sam kissed your forehead and then got up. You vaguely heard him moving around the room getting ready, but drifted in and out of sleep as he did. 

Once he was dressed he softly told you goodbye, that he hoped you felt better, and that he’d bring you back some food later on. 

The door clicked shut and you let your guilt continue eating you alive. 

You wondered how Tom would react when Sam told his family you weren’t feeling well, if his face would give anything away. He was an actor, he should be able to handle it. But you also wondered what he was feeling, if he felt as guilty as you did- or even more so. Or maybe he wouldn’t even care. You never knew when it came to him.

You rolled onto your back and propped yourself up on a pillow, using the free time to respond to some messages from friends and family. It was the middle of the night back in the States, but at least they’d wake up knowing you weren’t dead. To be fair, everyone knew your communication skills weren’t the best so they probably weren’t expecting anything from you anyway, but you still wanted to put in the effort. 

The rest of the day passed by quicker than you would’ve liked. You spent it in bed, tossing and turning as you desperately tried to fall back asleep. You kept pushing the blankets off of you, then burying yourself beneath them again, flipping between hot and cold. Maybe you really did have a fever. Your clothes were suffocating you so you ended up stripping and dropping them on the floor by the bed. 

By the mercy of some higher power you were able to nap for a couple of hours scattered throughout the afternoon, but by dinner time you were wide awake again and passed the time by watching Avatar: The Last Airbender in Italian on the hotel tv. 

It was playing an earlier episode, the one where the gaang visited Kyoshi Island. You couldn’t understand any of the dialogue, obviously, but you still found comfort in the familiar scenes. 

There was a knock on the door suddenly, startling you out of your focus. You jerked your head towards the sound and scrambled from the bed. You slipped back into your t-shirt, but didn’t bother putting on pants before opening the door because you figured it was just Sam. And it was. He looked exhausted, but in the best kind of way and was holding a styrofoam container of food that was presumably for you.

“Forgot the key,” he said sheepishly, offering you the food. You smiled and took it from him, stepping aside to let him in. 

He didn’t take your cue, instead he stayed where he was standing in the doorway awkwardly. It was then that you realized he wasn’t alone, that his older brother had been standing behind him the entire time.

Sam offered no explanation, only shrugged like he didn’t know why he was there either.

“Tom?” you asked, awaiting an explanation for yourself.

“Can we talk?” 

ik tags haven’t been working idk why i’m sorry!!! but lmk what you think i always appreciate feedback!!

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[ggukbabyy]

bro... idk about the whole plot of the drabble but it definitely should have some sexual tension going on but i'm not talking about a quick tension, you know... it could take hours or days idk i feel like you would kill it

“No, never,” you comment with a small shake of your head. Taehyung looks indignant.

“Everyone has done something outside of the bedroom at some point.”

You simply shake your head. “Not me.” Your eyes flick to Jeongguk briefly, his gaze drilling holes into the side of your face. He leans forward, forearms resting on the table.

“You’ve never needed someone so badly you couldn’t wait?” His voice is deep and husky, a hidden implication giving his words weight. You hold his gaze.

“The waiting is the fun part.” The corner of his mouth forms a faint smirk.

“That’s where we’ll have to disagree,” he replies, holding your eyes as he takes a long pull from his drink. Everyone breaks off into different conversations, the intrigue of your reluctance to perform sexual acts in a public space no longer the most interesting thing to discuss. Jeongguk appears to be the only one not ready to let it go.

You sit opposite him in the pub, enough people occupying the space that the din of background conversation makes it hard for others to hear as Jeongguk leans across the table once again.

“Do you really believe that? About waiting?” You’re not quite sure why he’s so interested but you entertain his line of questioning.

“100 percent,” you reply without hesitation and Jeongguk nods slowly as he considers your answer.

“You don’t think the desperation to have someone near you, in you, there and then is fun? How is that not better than waiting?” His eyebrows are drawn together in skepticism. He can’t for the life of him understand how you could enjoy waiting. It’s disheartening to hear when he’s spent the better part of the night trying to figure out a plan that would get you to follow him into the toilets. You’ve been acquaintances for about 4 months and he’s spent an embarrassingly large proportion of his time in your company thinking of all the different ways he’d like to spend his time with you if he could get you alone. And not for one second would he want to wait.

“I enjoy the anticipation,” you begin, moving to mirror his position. Jeongguk gets a wonderful eyeful of cleavage and he takes his time appreciating it.

“Wanting it so desperately and knowing you can’t have it now makes it all the better when it does happen.” For most of the sentence Jeongguk is picturing his dick between your tits so he only half hears what you say.

“Anticipation doesn’t change shit,” replies Jeongguk, leaning slightly closer. A small smile plays across your face, head tilted to the side slightly.

“It’s my favourite,” your voice has turned sultry, the alcohol muddling Jeongguk’s brain preventing him from noticing the change immediately. “The person is so close and not close enough, almost touching where you want and you could scream in frustration because two centimeters to the left and it would feel so fucking good, but they make you wait,” your voice is soft and captivating; even with everything happening around Jeongguk you’re the only one he can hear. His whole body feels jittery yet he’s glued to the spot, his chest beginning to rise and fall just a little deeper as you draw the perfect picture for him. “And wait some more, until I could cry, until I’m begging for the slightest touch or kiss in just the right place, so desperate and needy.” The switch from describing a situation to talking about yourself doesn’t go unnoticed by Jeongguk. In fact, it makes the room seem a little hotter, his pants feel a little tighter, his brain seems a little more clouded as he tries to focus on anything but the sounds you’d make as you beg or the words you’d say to get what you wanted from him. Saliva pools in his mouth at the thought of you spread below him close to tears with desperation. Your eyes are alive and wild yet the rest of your face is the picture of innocence and he’s not sure how much more he can take. You’re inching closer to his face across the table as you speak.

“But you don’t like waiting, do you Jeongguk?” You ask and he can faintly feel the warmth of your breath against his lips from this distance. He swallows thickly.

“You don’t want to keep me waiting, don’t like the idea of making me beg for it? For you?” You add on innocently, eyebrows raised as though you’d asked a perfectly simple, appropriate question. Jeongguk can barely form a coherent sentence with his head so full of everything you’ve just said. You stay there leaning on the table for a few more seconds, Jeongguk’s eyes flicking down to your lips, the air around you both suffocating and heavy. You grin widely before leaning back into your chair triumphantly. Jeongguk’s eyes are clouded with arousal, not trying to hide where your words have taken him and his reluctance to return to the real world. By the time he does you’ve moved on to a conversation with Jimin, giggling at his shit jokes. You don’t look Jeongguk’s way once for the rest of the night and it drives him insane.

-----

Two weeks later and you’re at Jimin’s place for a barbecue with a friend. Only Jimin’s housemates are Yoongi and Jeongguk, and no one told Jeongguk you were coming over. Ever since the night at the pub, Jeongguk has fantasised about you more than he would care to admit - even to himself. More than a few times his hand wandered south with pictures of you flashing behind his eyelids, replaying the conversation you’d had over and over, vividly picturing you doing the things you’d described. So when he walks out of the patio doors into the garden to see you laid across a towel on the floor, the smallest bikini he has ever witnessed wrapped around your body, to describe his feelings as shocked is a gross understatement. From his vantage point he can watch you while you remain none the wiser, so he takes the precious time to appreciate everything that you are. Your legs go on for miles and are toned to perfection, your tits fill out your bikini with some left to spill over the side and yearning burns deep in his stomach to have his lips against the smooth flesh, dragging his tongue leisurely across your nipple. Images of you begging for him flash violently across his mind, and he’s itching to return to his bedroom for a few minutes. But then you turn over and notice him, a lazy grin creeping slowly across your mouth.

“Can I help you?” You ask innocently, eyes dancing with amusement at having caught Jeongguk staring. He saunters over to you, arms braced behind him as he sits down.

“You’re in my garden, I should be asking you that question.” Your eyes are glued on the way his biceps tense to support his weight. It should be illegal for Jeongguk to walk around shirtless, even if it is the height of summer. For the sake of your own sanity he should walk around in a full wetsuit - but you’re sure he’d manage to make that look sexy. His broad chest is on full display, the golden skin pulled taut against the toned muscles of his abdomen. Your eyes continue their journey down his stomach, thoughts swirling at the dusting of hair beneath his belly button, following it down until it disappears beneath his shorts.

“Are you nearly done?” Amusement drips from his words as you pull your eyes from their pleasant detour. You fight desperately to keep the heat from your face.

“Almost.” Jeongguk’s tongue pokes the side of his cheek at your answer. He’s used to girls fawning over him, melting into a puddle of shy giggles and doting compliments. Not this. The idea of having you begging beneath him becomes more and more appealing the more you demonstrate all the ways you need to be taught a lesson.

Both of you bask in the heat of the sun in silence, music drifting out from the kitchen, Yoongi’s contagious laughter bringing a smile to your face. Surreptitiously you peek one eye open, looking sideways at Jeongguk. The perfect definition of his jaw is showcased with the way his head is tilted towards the sun, little beads of sweat developing at his temples and clinging to the nape of his neck.

“You should really put suncream on,” you state, shutting your eye before he can catch you again.

“Are you offering?” His tone is bored but excitement thrills through his chest.

“Not really.” Jeongguk fights the smile threatening to reveal itself.

“If I end up burning, it'll be all your fault,” Jeongguk complains, and when you say nothing in return, his arms buckle under his weight dramatically, his back thudding against the grass.

“I can feel the blisters forming already,” he groans, rocking side to side. You suppress chuckles as you watch his performance.

“Unngh,” he groans, turning his head to look at you, a fake pained expression pulling against his features. “I need you to put suncream on me,” he whines, “please.” His lips jut into a pout.

“Only because you asked so nicely,” you reply with an eye roll, Jeongguk all but ignoring it as a delighted grin lights up his face.

While you grab the cream, Jeongguk arranges himself into his original position, a satisfied smile gracing his plump lips as he basks in both his small victory and the heat of the sun. His smile vanishes, eyes snapping open, when he feels the cool of a shadow passing across him only to be faced with you straddling his lap. Your expression is the picture of innocence, eyes wide, head tilted, soft lips slightly parted as you hold to bottle of cream in one hand expectantly, but a flicker of wickedness flashes across your eyes, there one second and gone so quickly Jeongguk could almost convince himself that you’re clueless to the effect your close proximity has on him. But the way your back arches into him gives you away.

Jeongguk hisses a breath through his teeth at the first contact of the suncream against his warm skin and you giggle. There’s no hint of amusement on his face. Having you so close and yet unable to touch you has his mind reeling and frustration bubbling like acid in the pit of his stomach. You smell incredible, sweet and floral, and your hands are delicate as they roam his chest and stomach, eyes completely focused on the task at hand. He sighs deeply as he lets himself become lost in the way you touch him, the way your hands rove confidently, traversing low enough to have him forcing down the urge to buck his hips against you.

Nothing in the world is going to pull your gaze from the path your hands trace against Jeongguk’s skin. From his broad shoulders and collarbones you would be happy to drag your tongue across, to your palm grazing his nipple, noting the muscle in his jaw jumping at the contact. Down, down, down his stomach as low as his shorts allow, over his hips and waist. All amusement has vanished as your fingers explore. Jeongguk’s breathing is deep as you toy with the waistband of his shorts, slipping the tip of your finger just underneath. He’s watching you like a hawk, nostrils flaring as he wills you to just reach down, give him the look so he can take you upstairs and show you there’s no fun in waiting. Instead you raise your eyes to his and breathe out, “I need to do your arms.”

He shifts his weight forward, one arm held out for you, the other sliding around your body, hand resting gently on your arse. Raising your eyebrows questioningly at the placement, Jeongguk simply shrugs, a devilish smile flashing at you.

“What’s the matter, darling?” His deep voice questions. You forego a reply, squeezing cream directly onto his arm. He watches your face with delight as you continue.

“Turn around so I can do your back,” your voice is barely above a whisper. Having him so close for so long is starting to prove difficult. You can’t get your thoughts away from his hands, how strong and big they are in your own, how they’d wrap perfectly around your neck or how easy it would be for Jeongguk to prod and massage your g-spot until you were exhausted from overstimulation. It hasn’t slipped your notice that he’s been getting progressively harder beneath you, every inch of him pushing against your core. It’s getting hard to breathe, hard to look him in the eye - he relishes every second of your struggle with a cocky grin. His eyes are heavy and clouded with arousal and he drags his gaze leisurely down your body and back again.

“I’m sure you can reach from here, darling.” The determined look in your eye has Jeongguk chuckling. The action of reaching your hands over his shoulders and down his back has your chest pushing into his face and a small groan rumbles in Jeongguk’s throat. Your stomach burns with desire at the sound, a desperate need to hear the sound over and over, louder and then whispered into your ear, claws mercilessly at your insides, threatening to suffocate you. Without thinking you push your hips down in an effort to garner some friction against your swollen clit. The manoeuver doesn’t go unnoticed.

Jeongguk’s mind is blank. Your arse is pushing back into his palms, his fingers massaging the supple flesh delicately. With your tits so close to his face he determines it would be criminal if he doesn’t lean forward just a little more. His hair tickles your cheek as he moves, his nose brushing your chest as he gets closer. He flattens his tongue against the swell of your breast, licking a stripe against your glowing skin before sinking his teeth into you. A small gasp escapes your lips, hips rutting against him of their own accord. He groans again, using his hands to push you into him harder, desperation and frustration intermingling at the clothing separating your pussy from his bare skin. He pulls back to look up at you, the muscles of his jaw jumping as he restrains himself. Your lips are so close, both of your chests rising and falling rapidly, each waiting to see what the other will do, the atmosphere suffocating as the tension rises. Jeongguk’s gaze is intense and his eyes flick briefly down to your lips, his intentions and desires clear.

“Come to my room.” His voice is gravelly and shoots heat directly to where you need his touch the most. “Let me touch you, make you feel so good, princess.”

“We can’t,” you whisper back, lacking conviction.

“Why not?” Whines Jeongguk.

“Everyone will see and they’ll know.” It’s a feeble excuse and your resolve to stick with it is crumbling quickly.

“I’ll happily fuck you out here if that’s what you’d prefer.” Your cheeks flame at the idea. “It would be easy,” he continues, mind so consumed with you and his need to have you as close as possible. His fingers skim the apex of your thigh, toying with the edge of your bikini. “I’d just have to pull this to the side and then I’d see your pretty pussy, but I bet you have a tight cunt, couldn’t take my cock all at once.” Your core clenches reflexively at his words and you know you’re absolutely fucked.

“Come to my room,” he states, moving your hips over his with his hands. You smile devilishly, leaning forward until your lips almost brush.

“I’m sure you can wait a little bit longer.”

an; so i clearly don't know the meaning of the word drabble and you said i'd kill it so the perfectionism took over and i couldn't stop until i thought it was good

[key-to-my-heart]

S2 WISHFUL THINKING

hey hi hello! i haven’t really been active on tumblr but i wanted to get back into the swing of being active and posting often. so.

i decided i will take note of some of my predictions, hopes, wishes etc. for Season 2 of Rainbow High!

so i kinda wanna just cover the things we canonically have seen aka specific events and drama that has gotten introduced

- The New Roommates / Series 3 Girls

i feel like we will definitely see more of them within the coming episodes. rainbow high literally advertised the new teams as like… i think the second or third teaser for the new season

it’s interesting to me because. this makes me think of What The Runway Project is? what could it possibly be? i believe i made a post about this in the past but the main theory (and theory i believe the most in) would be a Stage Production of sorts. i mean… it makes sense!

the twins are both Performing Arts focus and are definitely the antags this season. so why wouldn’t they cause trouble in regard to a stage play? plus, bella is back. she’s literally a set designer! we have never seen her do any set designing (other than making a sketch) so it would be fun to see that! if river were to get more focus this season, he would definitely have an outlet to channel his Performing Arts creativity! plus… Daria is a song writer so like. imagine if we were to get music out of that? please. the possibilities are endless.

im also eager to see the series 3 girls dynamics. like are the rest of the girls (gabriella, georgia, emmy and daphne) all roomed together? do they get along? will they all be just as dramatic as stella, sheryl and daria’s dynamic?

but anyway. whatever the drama and the semester project is, the new teammates definitely seem to be playing a crucial role in this season.

- The Twins

i’m actually really eager to see more of them. i feel like not enough people are talking about them? season 2 is actually really interesting so far…. maybe more so than season 1… and i feel like we are going to have to thank the twins for that at some point lol

like. idek what they’re planning on doing but. i’m excited to see what it is! they’ll probably be involved in the semester project or at least causing problems to all of the roommates and teams. they’ll definitely have something going on with bella. and it seems that they have a good bond with karma (after the KWK we got). so maybe they’ll have input in any potential drama with Karma. which leads me to

- Karma VS. Violet

so. this drama has been teased at for like. ever. for what feels like forever.

this moment in Karma’s bio PLUS the commentary about violet from her and the twins in the recent KWK episode. but anyway. i’m actually super interested in whatever this drama could be??? like. why is karma watching.

we know violet adores karma, she really wants to have her in the vi life. so i’m sure she basically looks up to her! but like. will karma actually genuinely be nice with violet? keep a distance? make remarks like she did in her recent vlog? i don’t know. idk what to expect. of course it’ll have to do with vlogging or something.

- Bella

ok so there is a few things to note with bella. i’m still interested in if bella will accept to do an interview with Karma for her vlog? if so, i wonder how that would go. and i wonder how violet would feel about it. like the very last time bella was featured in vi’s vlog was on a bad note (even though they made up) but like. idk AAA

also i’m wondering how bella is gonna handle being back to rainbow high. because so far it seems she’s having trouble fitting in. will the key to her fitting in be Jade? will Jade help her figure everything out? or would it be someone else?

as much as i’d love Jade to be the reason Bella starts to feel more at home, i also love the other idea of Amaya being the reason bella feels comfortable again. Amaya was once the new girl (and of course in an awkward position because she was essentially a replacement for bella’s spot in the runway group) but. she didn’t fit in. she had to find her place at rainbow high… and it took her until the runway show to be able to truly feel comfortable.

and like. i’ve been rooting for bella/amaya dynamic for awhile now. i see a lot of potential in this duo. we know they somewhat have tension. i mean. bella had a really awkward confrontation with amaya and that was rly their first and last conversation. sure they’ve been around each other like in the music video, at the end of s1, and when bella walked into the girls dorm s2ep2 but like. that’s it.

SO ANYWAY. what i’m trying to get at is that these two definitely need to become friends. i mean. they have a LOT in common. i was talking about the new girl situation because i feel like they can relate in that way. they both had an awkward entrance into rainbow high and could bond over that. it took amaya awhile to feel at home at rainbow high… so maybe she could become friends with bella and help her feel at home! they’re both very determined leader types. they’re really passionate and! they have the same friend group! so why not become friends?

- Jade and Bella

of course i will wonder about these two! i have no clue what to expect with them. the fandom and myself are really really really wanting to see these two become a canon sapphic couple. i really want to see this happen! and mga knows this. mga knows we want to see jella happen. i mean, they literally snatched the ship name from us and plastered it into their vlogs. so they KNOW

anyway. these two are literally going through it rn. the way jade’s eyes lit up when she saw bella was back at rh. and now both of them are looking for each other and worried about each other. jade thinking bella is mad at her rn? please. i will sob. they are really holding off this jella reunion but i hope it’s for a good reason. i just want them to talk and have a good reunion… a hug……. happy tears, happy smiles…………..a love confession…

- Amaya

so i don’t really have much to say here but i’m just wondering about amaya this season. she’s definitely been advertised so much to the point that she essentially became like. THE main focus in season 1. this peeved some people but personally i loved amaya being like a sort of main character figure. she didn’t really take attention away from the other characters but also had that energy of being a main character anyway.

my point is, though, idk how she will play out in this season? like is she going to be as much of a main character as the main 6 are…. or will she play a bigger role? i have no clue. it seems bella is going to have a key focus this season, which makes sense, but it still just makes me wonder about amaya’s role this season

- Colin

i just hope this man does not get a development arc. i know some people want him to…. but i just. i don’t. i don’t understand. the point of him existing was to show that cheating is wrong and to display girl power. by teaching that skyler didn’t need a man to prove her worth. that she is her own person. her own strength! i really hope that colin and bella don’t have anything omfg.

- Winter Break

i’m really. REALLY excited for the winter break arc. it’s about time we get to see some backgrounds outside of rainbow high! plus the animated tidbits of ruby, sky, and violet in their wb outfits in the wb commercial was everything.

i’m so excited to see their new hairstyles, to see them with their snow gear and more. omg. of course i think the twins will be involved in this arc someone. krystal briefly mentioned the twins’ family having a ski lodge. and then of course we see sunny with her skis so like. yea!! i just wonder how these episodes would play out. or episode. but anyway like… will they just vibe? or will there be a problem of sorts? if it’s winter break then it probably won’t tie into school or like projects or anything like that

- Kia Hart

i’m actually hoping kia gets some focus this season. like. what is she going to do? is she going to pair another couple together? (if so, please be jella. okay wait seriously what if she is the key to reuniting jade and bella together… anyway) i just hope to see more of her and possibly more of her and krystal together haha. but kia just vibes so far, it would be lovely to get more of her!

- The A’s

so ainsley is finally beginning to get some attention! i really hope we continue to get more of her as well as avery, and aidan of course! we did get a bunch of content of aidan but you can never have enough honestly.

but i just wonder about how the A’s will be this season. like will they do anything significant? are bella and avery going to remain close? what is going on!!!

- The Malibu Line

so we literally know nothing about this except

but i still wonder like. if we will get to see anything about it at any point during the web series. perhaps it would be more of a summer thing. but it definitely means something if Bella is in it! (also i’m just generally excited for her new doll. omfg.)

- The Rock Line

so we also know almost nothing about this except

saw someone discuss that the music being heard during s2ep2 could be in regards to the rock battle. honestly. what if this is some sort of project? battle of bands or something? that would be cool lol. anyway i’m intrigued for this line mainly because of all the clothing leaks we have been getting omg.

- The Slumber Party Line

we have known about this for a little while (with the theory of the baby blue girl being in it) but i’m just curious as to who the characters are and if they will be in the web series at all.

- Jett Dawson

okay so. this is a big one. jett being a collector doll, i feel like she’ll definitely play a crucial role in the series. so like. who will she be to the main characters? it says she’s generally nice. why was she giving that look to the girls after their runway performance? IDK! i have no clue what to expect with her. i feel like the expectations i had for amaya (before we knew anything about her) will be put into jett because. the vibes i got from amaya ever since we just had her doll… i am also kind of getting from jett. so i’m eager!

[veliseraptor]

got tagged for two fic writer memes yesterday! the one from @ameliarating first:

How many works do you have on AO3?

509.

What’s your total AO3 word count?

3,432,24. dang! that’s a lot of words

How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

I have written for...counting the MCU as one fandom, on AO3 I have written for 32 fandoms, including at least one work in:

MCU, The Sillmarillion, Caliban Leandros, both DC and Marvel Comics, the book Barebacked by Kit Whitfield, Doctrine of Labyrinths, Doctor Who, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Star Wars, Black Jewels, Dragon Age, Lucifer, Dexter, Temeraire, Gentleman Bastard Sequence, Supernatural, A Song of Ice and Fire, Greek Mythology, Lymond Chronicles, Merlin BBC, Code Geass, Good Omens,  Death Note, and White Collar.

this is not a comprehensive list of every fandom I’ve ever written for, because it is not including ones that live only on FFN or Livejournal.

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Life In Reverse tops the list (11066), aka my 200k Loki-centric post-Thor AU fic that I wrote between 2012 and 2018 and with which I have a decidedly complex relationship at this point. I love it but also I no longer think it’s my best work but also I credit it with teaching me a fuck of a lot about writing and writing longer projects in general.

With Absolute Splendor is rapidly catching up, to my astonishment (6559), despite having been posted for less than half as long. Aka the wedding planning fic that’s really just me mucking about in my Jiang Cheng and my Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian feelings, at length.

some good mistakes (4618) was my first foray into the Untamed version of “characters who hate each other going on resentful roadtrips together, feat. Lan Wangji and Jiang Cheng.” I have gone on to write others and will continue to write more.

Unraveling (3069) is a little bit of a surprise but also not - it was originally just sort of WWP stuff for my ‘what if people remembered that blunt force trauma is a really bad thing actually’ problem that pops up sometimes, re: Loki at the end of The Avengers, and then it kind of turned into a whole thing. I personally think it’s the weakest of the installments of the series it belongs to, but it is the first one and also the one that gets least into the broader family dysfunction and depression stuff that probably is less everyone’s thing (but is what came out this fic that mattered more to me, personally).

I am a little surprised to see Steve Rogers’ Halfway House for Notorious Supervillains (3068) here too! I was expecting one of the more...idk, mainstream concepts from the MCU to win out? But I also wasn’t expecting two Untamed fics to make it here, either. But I am stupid proud of this fic even if it is very extraordinarily unfinished. This is one of those unfinished fics that will nag at me unless and until I finish it, at least a little, because the concept - if I do say so myself - is so goddamn good and I think I was executing it pretty well, too.

Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

Pretty much never. I was never very good at it and now I’d feel like I had to go back and reply to all of them and I just. I can’t do that. and when I do try to just start at the beginning I get overwhelmed very fast and start avoiding it.

Basically I decided that if it’s a decision between wrestling with myself to reply to comments versus actually doing more writing I’m going to end up landing on the latter as feeling both more doable and more productive.

What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

probably it’s The Worlds Forgotten, the Words Forbidden for sheer level of “so then what was the point” of it all. but like. I’ve definitely written a few extraordinarily miserable fics, and by “a few” I kind of mean “a lot.” Other nominees I’d put down might be nor autumn falter (for currently personally making me suffer most), once there was a way to get back home (for I think having the ouchiest summary), and Waiting for the Summer Rain (which remains one of my personal favorite Supernatural fics I wrote).

but like. there are 43 fics I have marked with Major Character Death warnings and every single one of those, pretty much, has a downer ending.

Do you write crossovers? If so, what is the craziest one you’ve written?

I have written several though not in a long time! My craziest probably remains the Morgoth/Cthulhu short I wrote that actually got sporked because someone took it seriously (???) enough to do that. But the craziest that actually has any merit, (I’d argue) is probably the Maeglin/Viserys one.

not linking to either, if you want to go find them I don’t think it’ll be that hard.

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Yeah, a few times on a few different things. More if you count “people who seem to like the fic but love telling you how much they hate the female characters you’re writing about in it” as ‘hate’ which I would but isn’t, you know, quite as straightforward. If I had a nickel for every time someone bitched about Jane in Life in Reverse, though...lots of nickels.

Do you write smut? if so what kind?

Sure do! But what does ‘what kind’ mean, I don’t know how to answer that question. I feel tempted to just put in my “Mike’s Hard Kinks” image edit in this space.

I guess usually I tend to write smut that at least involves a little bit of a kink? I don’t think I’d feel comfortable writing entirely kinkless smut. I think I’d feel weird about it, the same way I do when I write really nice fic, generally.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I think I did back when but I don’t remember anything about it. I feel like it was one of those mass data scraping things where my fic happened to be among those caught up in it.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

I have! several actually, mostly into Russian and Chinese. every time it happens I’m immensely flattered that someone wants to put in that kind of work on something I wrote.

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I think I’d be very, very bad at it.

What’s your all time favorite ship?

Depends on when you ask me! I could probably give you a top five but then I’d remember six that I forgot to mention five minutes later. I guess if I were to think about ships that feel like they hold very special particular places in my heart... Xue Yang/Xiao Xingchen, Steve Rogers/Loki, and Min/Rand come to mind.

What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

oh god do you want the whole list cause honestly I could just like. screencap the entirety of my “in progress” folder with a crying emoji watermarked over it. and that’s not getting into the fics that are like...half formed babies in my consciousness but not anywhere on paper.

and also I just hate to admit that I might not finish something.

you know what? the Lucifer/Good Omens crossover I started would’ve been a lot of fun. I’m probably never going to finish it, but it would’ve been great if I had. I know other people did it too but my contribution could’ve been amazing.

I can say this very boldly with the near certainty that I’m not going to finish the fic so no one will be able to disagree.

(...also the Last Herald-Mage fix it. that was going to be a good fic too, and also will probably languish unfinished forever.)

What are your writing strengths?

I’m pretty sure dialogue is my strongest point. Dialogue and emotions, which is why I always end up just wanting to write about characters talking and having feelings at each other.

What are your writing weaknesses?

Writing action sequences throws me into conniptions every time I have to do it and I will take drastic actions sometimes to avoid doing it at all, which probably weakens the work as a whole.

Also, I don’t plan ahead and this means I write myself into corners kind of a lot. If I wasn’t writing long, dense fic it wouldn’t be a problem but here we are.

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I tend to avoid it unless it’s in the context of, as in CQL/MDZS fic, leaving certain terminology untranslated. I’m pretty sure I almost never write full exchanges of dialogue in a different language than I’m using for the narration within a fic, and generally speaking my reaction to other people doing it is at least mildly negative.

What was the first fandom you wrote for?

Harry Potter was technically the first fandom I wrote for, but it was a crack fic I wrote to make my friends laugh more than anything; I tend to count Wheel of Time as my first actual fandom for which I wrote my first actual fic.

What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

some days the answer is “all of them” and some day the answer is “I don’t like anything I’ve written in my entire life” and I never like giving this a definitive answer. yesterday I reread efforts in a common cause (the bound copy!! thanks @spockandawe) and you know what, that was a good fic and I’m proud of it, so I’m going with that one, for this meme, today.

tagging: @mostfacinorous, @jaggedcliffs, @silvysartfulness, @mikkeneko, @kasasagi-eye, @curiosity-killed, how many people am I supposed to tag for this one anyway

[minijenn]

Keys to the Kingdom Preview

So I'm having... a fucking week. Between the Smash reveal and a number of other IRL things, focusing on this chapter has been a bit... tricky. But here's a bit of what I've managed to write so far, enjoy more of Sora interacting with the Mystery Twins idk why but these interactions are really easy and really fun to write ahahah ^_^

***

“Ok,” he says, much to the twins’ shared relief. “I… guess I can make some time to stick with you guys a little while longer.” A little while longer before he can give the heirloom back to Bill, before he can get the reward he so desperately craves. Before he can finally be free.

And really, after waiting this long for that freedom, certainly he can afford to wait just a little bit more.

“Thanks, Sora!” Mabel exclaims warmly, bounding ahead to join her brother. “See, Dipper?” she whispers to him, aside. “I told you we could trust him!”

“Seeing as how he’s the only person we know who can actually get rid of those monsters, it's not like we really have too much of a choice…” Dipper says, though he wears a smile all the same. “But… I guess you weren’t wrong. This time, anyway.”

Sora swallows hard when he happens to overhear this, the sizable knot of guilt already settled in his stomach tightening to an almost oppressive degree. Whatever trust either of the twins might have for something is something he knows he hasn’t earned, something he definitely doesn’t deserve after what he’s just done. As he trails a few paces behind them, his hand drifts down to his pocket, to the heirloom, to reveal his crimes and come clean like he knows he should. And yet… at the same time, he knows he can’t. Not when this is perhaps the last and only chance he has at turning the tide, at undoing what’s been done, at saving his own life. Certainly, if Dipper and Mabel knew just what he’s up against, if they knew everything he’s already lost and still stands to lose, then they’d understand the lengths he’s taking to finally stop it all… wouldn’t they?

“Hey, Sora?” Mabel pipes up, pulling out of his fretful thoughts as they venture back into the woods. The dark path ahead is only sparsely illuminated by the flashlight Dipper had grabbed back at the shack, though that light does little to chase away the oddly ominous aura the forest carries at night. Or at least, an aura that’s even more ominous than the one that had filled it during the day. “I’ve been wanting to ask you for awhile now: what’s that Key thing that Xamnams guy wants you to get so badly?”

“Oh yeah, I was wondering about that too,” Dipper glances back at the older boy. “Is it the same key you fought those monsters with, or is it something different?”

“Oh, um, yeah, it’s different,” Sora nods, more than happy for the distraction this kind of conversation can serve his troubled mind. “It’s a special kind of Key that’s one out of thirteen that my--I-I mean his master has been looking for. And if they get their hands on it first… let’s just say something really… bad could happen.”

“Wait, so that guy isn’t actually your boss?” Mabel asks.

No, of course he’s not, Sora thinks, though the words refuse to leave his mouth. A small burst of pain constricts around his heart, one that feels far too familiar to the point that he doesn’t even think twice about where it could be coming from. That same pain bars him from saying what he really wants to, though this time, it doesn’t force him to say something else against his will. What he’s able to get out instead is still far from anything substantial though. “Uh… w-well, he’s my… I-I, uh… It’s-”

“Let me guess,” Dipper cuts in knowingly. “It’s something else that’s ‘complicated’, isn’t it?”

The most Sora can do is nod, rubbing his arm as he apprehensively glances away from the twins. Mabel’s quick to fill in the newfound silence, however, with a small coo of curious fascination. “Ooo, Sora, you’re such a complex guy!” she grins, a smile that turns a touch coy as she twirls a lock of her hair playfully. “Ya know I’ve always had a thing for men of mystery.”

Naturally, Sora still isn’t quite sure of how to respond to the younger girl’s persistent brand of “unique” flirting. Fortunately, he doesn’t have to as Dipper dryly interrupts. “What, you mean like that ‘mysterious’ guy you dated who turned out to be a bunch of gnomes stacked on top of each other?” he asks, flashing his sister a bit of a teasing smirk.

“Yeesh, I accidentally go out with some creepy gnomes one time and suddenly I never hear the end of it,” Mabel huffs, rolling her eyes. “At least I didn’t spend the entire summer desperately crushing on someone who’s waaaay too old for me.”

“Says the girl who’s literally doing that right now,” Dipper retorts, catching Mabel in the middle of the affectionate wave she’s sending Sora’s way.

“...And your point is?”

As the twins’ next round of insincere bickering kicks off, Sora does his best to try and focus on it, only for his thoughts to drift internally once more. As far as he knows, Xemnas, or any other Organization member for that matter, isn’t anywhere in the immediate vicinity, so how does their power still have such a restrictive hold on him, to the point that he can’t even speak freely? Has he really fallen so far under their sway that he can be forced to do their bidding from a distance? Does he really have so little freedom left that he’s bound to obey them even when not a single one of them is around?

It’s a grim, downright horrifying thought, a reality he knows he ultimately can’t escape from, at least not on his own. He draws in a steadying breath as he gently pats the pocket the glass globe is resting in, shuddering as he feels another wave of its palpable power wash over him. Regardless of whatever it is that globe actually holds, right now, it also holds all of his once-faded hopes, his nearly-dead dreams, his last chance at living the life he longs to lead instead of the life that’s fallen apart all around him. And all it’ll take for him to finally get that life is to take that globe back to its rightful owner, to give it back to Bill so that Bill can give him back everything he’s lost in return.

So that’s exactly what he’ll do. No matter how uncertain his mind and heart alike still are of whether or not he should.

[ohmyjinsus]

the right reasons

yang hongseok x gender neutral! reader

recent college grads nonsense idk || 5.9k

** there is some drinking in this (they are of age, after all), but no swearing uwu**

finally, a fic not inspired by a taylor swift song, shocking, I know (I listened to cruel summer on a loop while I was writing this though, I think y’all will see why)

summary: when your best friend, hongseok, decides to audition for bachelor in paradise after graduation, you don’t want to believe it ….. mainly because you’re in love with him, even if you haven’t realized it yet

“Do you think I should apply?”

You look up. The two of you are watching The Bachelor in his apartment. Hongseok’s the only other person you know who’s into it. Once you found out, you immediately agreed to watch it together. Ordering takeout and making fun of the contestants has been your tradition ever since you met 4 years ago.

“I’m confused,” you say. You were checking your phone during the commercials.

“Bachelor in Paradise,” Hongseok replies, gesturing to the TV. “They’re casting for next season, there was an ad.”

“That came out of nowhere.” He doesn’t look phased.

“We’ve graduated now,” he says. “I don’t know what else to do with my life.”

“You have a point,” you reply. It’s been one month since all of you finished university. Lots of your other friends had jobs lined up beforehand, but you and Hongseok still have no idea what you’re doing.

“Right?” He grins. “I could go on, I’d have something to do, then I’d come back and I’d have a bunch of new Instagram followers and I could do sponsorships or something.”

“You realize that sounds crazy, right?” You grab a french fry from the box on the coffee table.

“It’s not!” You roll your eyes. “Think about it y/n, I’m smart, funny, attractive, nice-”

“Wrong, wrong, wrong, and wrong, but okay.” He laughs.

“I’m exactly what they’re looking for on these shows.”

“But you want to go on for the wrong reasons.”

“Shhhh,” he tells you. “Nobody needs to know that.”

“What’s your story then?” You ask.

“I grew up seeing my parents being so in love,” you make a gagging noise, but he keeps going. “And now, I want that kind of love for myself. The apps are just no good, and I need to find a special someone to spend the rest of my life with.”

“Jesus christ,” you mutter. “You didn’t mention anything about your personal journey to find love.”

“Oh right,” he says. “Now that I’m finished university, my main focus is to settle down, get married, have kids, and I’m on my personal journey to find all of that.”

“Amazing,” you fake clap for him. “You’re a shoo-in.”

“There’s no harm in applying, right?” He shrugs. “I doubt it’ll lead anywhere, but it could be fun.”

“I guess so,” you admit. “Your chances are slim, but you never know.”

“What do you mean?” He says, offended. “Have you seen me in a swimsuit?”

“Shut up.” You throw your napkin at him, but you’re laughing.

Hongseok offers to grab you another drink, so you tell him yes. He doesn’t mention anything else about the show for the rest of the night. By the time you’ve gone home, it’s completely slipped your mind.

===

When Hongseok invites you over 2 weeks later, you assume he just wants to hang out and have dinner. You’re shocked when he sits you down on the couch and says he has news to share.

“You’re dating someone.” He shakes his head. “Someone died.”

“No,” he tells you, laughing. “I love how those are your first two guesses though.”

“What is it?”

“I got a call yesterday from the Bachelor in Paradise producers...”

“You’re joking.” You didn’t expect that to go anywhere. You just assumed Hongseok would send in his audition tape and never hear back. The possibility of him actually being on the show makes you feel uneasy. “Really?”

“Yes, y/n, really.” He sits down on the armchair, facing you. “They want to meet me in person next week.”

“Oh my god,” you say. “Congratulations.”

“You don’t sound that happy,” he smirks. “Are you jealous?” You shake your head right away.

“I’m just surprised.”

“You didn’t think they’d want me?” He asks quietly.

“No, of course not,” you reassure him. “You’re kind, and funny, and attractive, why wouldn’t they want you?”

“Exactly,” he grins at you.

“So are you gonna go?” He nods.

“Why not? The worst they could do is say no.”

“That’s so exciting,” you tell him. He seems very happy about it, and the last thing you want to do is bring him down. As his best friend, you should definitely be supportive.

“Will you come with me?”

“What?” You glance at him.

“Downtown, for my interview,” he clarifies. “I have to take the train down and meet them there, I don’t really want to go alone.”

“Are you nervous?”

“A little bit,” he admits. “I’d just feel better if I had someone with me.”

“What about Changgu?” Hongseok shakes his head. “Shinwon?”

“You’re my first choice.” That catches you off guard. “We can make a day of it,” he suggests. “We can go to that bakery you wanted to try on Queen, and we can go shopping, get dinner, it’ll be fun.”

“Sure,” you say. Going on adventures with Hongseok is always a good time. “How long will your interview be?”

“They didn’t say,” he replies. “I just know it’s at 10 on Wednesday.”

“Cool,” you pull out your phone so you can put it in your calendar. “So if it goes horribly, I can cheer you up, and if it goes well, we can celebrate.”

“Sounds good.” He smiles at you. “Thanks y/n.”

You nod but there’s a small part of you that’s anxious. You decide to ignore your feelings for the time being. Your day with Hongseok is going to be great, you should focus on that and enjoy your time together.

===

Hongseok meets you outside the train station the morning of his interview. The first thing you notice is how nicely he’s dressed. As he gets closer to you, you notice he smells really great too.

“I should’ve dressed up some more,” you mutter, glancing down at your own outfit. You’re dressed like you’re going to class, while Hongseok’s dressed for a first date.

“You look fine, don’t worry.” He heads towards the entrance, so you follow close behind.

You were right to have Hongseok come early, as the train is at the platform the second you get there. He follows you to the back of the car, and sits down facing you.

He hasn’t seen you in person since he asked you to join him on this trip. Apparently he went on a shopping trip with Changgu yesterday. That’s when he got his current outfit.

“No wonder this cardigan is so nice, you couldn’t have picked out anything like that yourself.” Hongseok rolls his eyes at you, but he’s smiling.

The train leaves soon after. Hongseok watches out the window like a little kid. He keeps his eyes on the station until it’s all the way out of sight. And you keep your eyes on him until he catches you looking.

“Are you nervous?” You ask him. He shakes his head, but you notice his leg bouncing up and down.

“It’s just like a first date, right?”

“Exactly,” you reassure him. “And you’re great at those.”

“Are you sure?” He asks. “You’ve never been on one with me.” You don’t know how to respond to that. You almost want to tell him to take you on one. But you’re just friends, you remind yourself, you can’t do that.

“You’ve dated more people than I have,” you point out. “You’ll be fine.”

“I hope you’re right.”

The two of you sit in silence for a little while. Hongseok goes on his phone, so you focus on yours. You brought your AirPods so you can listen to music or watch a show while Hongseok’s busy with the producers.

“y/n-” You look up. Hongseok looks like he’s about to ask you something, but he hesitates.

“What’s up?” He shakes his head.

“What’s the plan for the rest of the day?” He asks you. You know that’s not what he was planning on saying, but you go with it.

“While you’re busy, I’ll get us breakfast,” you tell him. “There’s a café across the street, let me show you.” You sit down next to him so you can show him your phone. When he leans over to get a look at the screen, you’re suddenly aware of how close he is. You push it out of your mind.

By the time you’ve planned out your day, you’ve arrived at the train station. The two of you grab all your things and leave the train. Once you’re out of the station, the interview location isn’t too far away. There’s still 20 minutes before Hongseok’s meant to be there. He’s adamant about getting there early though. Although he won’t outright say it, you can tell he’s nervous. No wonder he brought you instead of one of his other friends; they wouldn’t let him live this down.

Once you get there, there’s a line of all the other candidates running through the main hallway. You and Hongseok join the end of the line.

“You don’t have to stay,” he tells you. You shake your head.

“It’s fine,” you say. There’s a check-in desk a few metres ahead of you. “I’ll stay until you get past there.”

“Okay,” he replies. “Thanks.” You bump your shoulder against his.

He’s brought his application package with him, so you ask to look it over while the two of you wait. There’s tons of pictures of him, some of them shirtless, which you quickly flip through. Then there’s copies of all of Hongseok’s identification. At the very back, there’s the printed copy of his application. You move that to the front, flipping through to make sure he didn’t leave anything blank.

He never asked you to look over his online application before he handed it in, so you’re interested to see what he had to say. There are the stereotypical questions about his career, education, background, and all of that. But there are also some more personal questions further down.

Why do you want to be on this show? Are you prepared to get engaged at the end of the season?

Hongseok’s answer is cookie cutter perfect. He knows he’s the prime candidate for this kind of show. Kind, good-looking, easy to fall for. He’s played to all his strengths in his application. You know he’s lying about being prepared to propose at the end of the show, but everyone does that. His answer comes off as genuine though.

The line moves up a little bit while you flip to the next page. It’s all about his dating history. You’re shocked at how invasive these questions are. Then again, if it’s for reality TV, it has to be.

The first section asks for a detailed dating history from the past 5 years. You’re familiar with all of that. He’s never told you about any ex-girlfriends, or anyone he’s currently interested in. He’s a casual dater, and you’ve never seen him tied down for too long. The maximum amount of dates he’s been on with one person is 3. You haven’t seen anyone get past that point. He seems to get bored easily. You’re honestly surprised he’s been friends with you for this long.

Despite all of his casual dating history, he’s made it clear he’s ready to settle down now. You thought he was just making this up to get on the show, but the more you read, the less you’re sure. Maybe he’s just persuasive.

The line moves a little bit more. Now there are just 3 other people ahead of you. Hongseok’s on his phone again. You figure you have enough time to skim the rest of his answers.

Have you ever been in love? is the next question. You know the answer is no, so you’re surprised when there’s a couple paragraphs written underneath it.

I have, but I was never brave enough to act on it. You try to read the entire section as quickly as you possibly can, but your brain doesn’t work that well. You grab some words here and there, years, class, close friends but not enough to fully comprehend.

“C’mon y/n,” Hongseok says to you. “We’re next.” He holds his hand out for the folder.

You glance down at the page you’re on. Although you want to read the rest, you also realize you’ve stumbled upon something incredibly personal. Granted, Hongseok may wind up sharing this on national television, but for now, it’s none of your business.

“Here,” you close it and hand it to him.

“Thanks.”

Hongseok gets checked in soon after that. It takes about 5 minutes for them to verify his identity and double check his application. Finally, they direct him to a room down the hall where he’ll meet some of the producers. They tell you you can’t go beyond this point.

“Good luck,” you say to Hongseok, not sure what else to say. He smiles.

“Thanks y/n.”

Some of his hair is falling in his face, so you reach out to quickly brush it out of the way. When you pull away, he’s looking at you with an expression you’ve never seen before. It feels surprisingly intimate.

“Text me when you’re done,” you tell him, pulling yourself out of your thoughts. “You’ll be great.”

He nods, and the two of you go your separate ways. You know you’ll see him again in an hour, but it still feels weird to say bye to him like this. You hope nothing changes if he does wind up on this stupid show.

You walk out the doors onto the sidewalk again, thankful for the fresh air. You pull your AirPods out of your bag, so you can listen to some music. As you walk along the street, you can’t help but think of Hongseok and what he might be saying to the producers in there.

You tell yourself you’re curious just because you’re best friends. But you can’t get that look on his face out of your mind. You have no idea what it means. You’re just really close friends, right?

You turn the music up, hoping to distract yourself. It works until you pass a small playground. You can’t help but think of Hongseok yet again.

The two of you met during your university’s orientation week, but it wasn’t until halfway during the semester that you actually spoke to him. You knew you were taking some classes together, but you never really thought about it until then.

Speaking in class was something that always terrified you, but one of your professors was adamant that everyone do it in order to get full marks. It took a while for you to work up the courage to raise your hand that day in October. When you were called on, you hesitated for a second, before sharing your answer. You don’t even remember the question anymore, you just remember your professor outright laughing at you. You’d been so sure you were right, but your professor made it very clear that you were not. Right away, you threw all your things into your backpack and ran out of the lecture hall. Your heart was beating so fast and you had no idea where to go. You wound up outside, walking as far as your legs could possibly take you, until you found a park off campus. As soon as you sat down on the swings, you couldn’t help but cry.

It was one thing to get an answer wrong, but to have your professor react like that was humiliating. You were never going back to that class ever again. You’d drop the course, or only show up on test days, whatever it took to never see that godforsaken man ever again. You were so lost in your thoughts that you didn’t even notice when someone sat down on the swing next to you.

After that day, you and Hongseok quickly became friends. You still can’t believe he was kind enough to follow you out of class like that, but he always tells you it was nothing. As you think back to it now, you can’t help but feel a rush of affection for him. Maybe he is more than a friend to you.

You head to the playground and sit on the swings alone, thinking back to some of your other memories with Hongseok. He’s always been there for you to lean on, and you’ve always done the same for him, like today. You remember feeling this way when he’d specifically asked you to come with him. At this point, you’re about 90% sure you have feelings for him. You don’t know how you didn’t clue in earlier.

You stay there until your phone buzzes. Hongseok’s done sooner than you expected. He says he’ll meet you at the café where you wanted to get breakfast. You respond, saying you’ll see him there soon.

You didn’t walk that far, so it only takes about 5 minutes of speed walking to get back there. When you spot him waiting outside on his phone, you can’t help but smile.

The two of you head inside, while you tell him what you got up to. You say you found a park bench and wound up doing some work there. He rolls his eyes and tells you you should’ve found something more entertaining to do.

After you’ve got your food and sat down, you ask him about the interview.

“It was okay,” he says, taking a sip of his coffee. “I think they liked me.”

“What do you mean think?”

“It seems like they believed me when I told them how passionate I am about my journey for love.” You smirk at that.

“Are you sure you weren’t speaking from the heart?”

“Of course I was y/n,” he says, jokingly. “How dare you insinuate I’m applying for the wrong reasons.”

You’re still unsure if he’s joking or not. After your earlier revelation, you’re praying he is.

He tells you some more about the interview and the producers. Apparently they asked even more invasive questions about his dating history, like his body count. That makes you cringe.

“If they offer you a spot,” you ask, “which I’m not saying they will, but if they do, would you take it?” You expect him to say yes right away, but he ponders it for a second.

“I don’t know,” he replies. “What do you think I should do?”

You want to tell him to say no, and to stay at home. Preferably so you can spend more time with him, and then maybe he’ll realize he’s into you as well. But you can’t say that, of course.

“I think it could benefit you,” you tell him, honestly. “But it’ll also change your life in multiple different ways, and that’s something you’d really have to think about.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well,” you hesitate, taking a sip of your drink. “Assuming you wound up in a relationship by the end of the season, the odds of it working out aren’t that high,” he laughs at that, but doesn’t disagree. “Anyone you date after that will always see you as that guy who was on Bachelor in Paradise. You’ll probably have a wider range of people to choose from, but a lot of them will be fake too, so, it’s up to you.” You shrug.

“All valid points,” he replies.

“I don’t know if you’re ever planning on settling down,” you admit. “But if you do, it’ll affect that and whoever you wind up with.”

“I would like to settle down someday,” he says quietly. You glance across the booth at him. “What?”

“I’ve never really thought about you in a long term relationship. It doesn’t seem like your type of thing.”

“It could be,” he tells you, “with the right person.”

You just nod, afraid you might say something stupid if you open your mouth.

Once you’re finished eating, the two of you head out to the closest subway station. You have a list of stores you want to visit, and Hongseok happily follows along. He helps you pick out some gifts for your friend’s upcoming birthday and some clothes. He winds up buying some things for himself as well. You joke that he’ll have to buy an entirely new wardrobe if he winds up on national television. He promises to take you swimsuit shopping with him if that happens. That makes you roll your eyes, but you’re blushing the whole time.

You stop for lunch at a random fast food chain, then head to that bakery you told him about the week before. The two of you get some extra goodies for your roommates as well.

Finally, it’s almost 7 o’clock and you decide to go to a decent sit down restaurant for dinner. Earlier you told Hongseok you were in the mood to drink tonight, so he promised to take care of you. He lets you pick where to go, so you choose a restaurant with a rooftop bar. You know he likes to take nice photos for his Instagram feed.

The food is good, and the drinks are even better. You only have a few, but you can feel them getting to you. Hongseok’s extremely entertained by you. Normally you’re not this talkative, but you’re asking more questions and telling him more random things than usual.

You wind up telling him the truth about how you wound up at the park this morning. He’s surprised you lied, but you refuse to tell him why. Instead he just smiles and tells you it’s cute you thought of him. You wind up blushing profusely, hoping he doesn’t notice. The two of you reminisce over some other memories from early on in your friendship. You’re surprised he remembers them as well as you do. Maybe that means something.

When you’re finished eating, you stay a little longer. Hongseok has 2 drinks as well, but he can handle his liquor much better than you. It seems to have no effect on him at all. By the time you leave, it’s almost 9:30.

The second you step out of the restaurant, you’re met with a crowd of people. As you awkwardly navigate yourself around them, you’re separated from Hongseok. Once you’re free, you glance around, afraid you might have to call him. Thankfully, he’s waving at you from a couple metres ahead. You run over to him and immediately interlock your arms.

“C’mon,” he says, pulling you in the direction of the train station. You could have taken the subway back, but Hongseok suggested you walk instead, as it’s not too far. It’s dark out now, but it looks nice with all the street lamps lit up.

“I forgot to ask something about Bachelor in Paradise,” you say as the two of you head down the sidewalk. “Did they mention when they’ll get back to you?”

“In two weeks or so.”

“Will they let you know if you get rejected?” Hongseok smirks at that.

“Do you want me to get rejected?” You know he’s joking, but you can’t bring yourself to smile.

“Yes.” You mumble, mostly to yourself. Hongseok must not hear you.

“I was scared earlier,” he says. “But it might be fun. It’s a free vacation, technically.”

“Yeah, for the cost of your sanity.” That makes him laugh too. You rest your head against his arm.

“Do you think I could actually find someone worthwhile on there?” He asks quietly. “I know the premise is to date multiple people, but maybe I could find something real.”

“Hongseok-” You almost want to punch him. You wish you could yell at him, here on the sidewalk, and tell him off for not realizing there’s been something real right in front of him for the past 4 years, but you can’t bring yourself to do it. “Please.”

“I know, it sounds ridiculous, but you never know.” You two turn the corner and wind up right in front of the train station’s main entrance. “Crazier things have happened.”

You don’t know if it’s because you’re tired, or slightly drunk, or what, but you pull your arm out of his and turn to face him.

“Hongseok-” He glances into your eyes. This time, he notices something serious is happening.

“y/n, what is it?”

“Please don’t go,” you say quietly. He takes a step closer so he can hear you better. “Just… don’t do it.”

“I mean, I haven’t made up my mind yet,” he says, awkwardly. “But I thought you wanted me to do what’s best for me.” You shake your head.

“I was wrong,” you tell him. “I can’t do it.”

“You can’t do what?” You freeze. You wish you hadn’t used that choice of words, but at this point, there’s no turning back now.

“I can’t stay here and watch you on TV, dating other people, kissing other people, being with other people.” You’re not dumb, you know what the fantasy suites on that show are for, and imagining Hongseok in one of them with somebody else makes you simultaneously want to cry and throw up.

“I don’t understand.” You groan. You were hoping that would’ve been enough to get your point across, but of course, your best friend isn’t that smart.

“I’m going to be so jealous.” You hate yourself for even saying it, but it’s true. Hongseok reaches out, taking your hands in his. “My heart can’t handle it.”

“y/n,” he says. “You’ll always be my best friend, regardless of what happens-”

You pull your hands away from his. You don’t understand how he’s not getting it at this point. Granted, you’re not thinking clearly because of the alcohol, but he should be able to read between the lines.

“That’s not what I meant,” you tell him. “I don’t just want to be your best friend.”

“What?” It seems like it’s starting to click now. But just to be sure, you decide to outright say it.

“I’m in love with you.” It comes out louder than you intended, but the second you say it, you know it’s true. Even though the realization only, truly, hit you today, you’ve never been more sure of anything in your life. Your heart is beating a million miles a minute, but it doesn’t matter. “Hongseok, I love you.”

“You do?” He asks quietly. You nod, too scared to say anything else. “I don’t know what to say.”

You wait, not sure what to say either. Both of you just stand there, awkwardly staring at each other for a few seconds. Panic starts to set in at that point, maybe you shouldn’t have said anything.

“y/n-” You can tell from the tone of his voice that he’s going to turn you down. You really shouldn’t have said anything at all.

“It’s okay.” You cut him off right away. You don’t want to hear him outright rejecting you, not now. “It’s okay.”

“y/n, I-” You reach over and press a finger to his lips. Maybe he’ll just brush it off as you being drunk, that’s what you’re hoping for anyway. You wish you could take it back, but that would be the next best thing.

“Really,” you force a smile. “It’s okay. I’m sorry.” You glance at the time on your phone, realizing your train will be there any second. You don’t want to think about the awkward train ride home.

“Here,” you tell him, gesturing towards the entrance to the train station. “You can take this one and I’ll wait for the next one, it’s okay.” Maybe if you say it enough times, it’ll be true.

“y/n, I can’t leave you waiting here for an hour on your own.”

“Fine, I’ll take a cab,” you tell him. “Just go, before I make a fool of myself again.”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” he walks through the doors, so you awkwardly follow him. “Nothing’s changed.”

That hurts more than an actual rejection. You could tell he doesn’t have feelings for you too, but for him to dismiss your feelings like this stings. You can’t stand sitting next to him in dead silence on a 30 minute train ride. You can feel the tears starting to form in your eyes, but you try to ignore them.

Once you’re both on the platform, the train is already there, waiting.

“I’m going to go down there,” you say to him, pointing to the far end of the train. “Don’t follow me.” You hope he can’t tell your voice is about to break.

“Okay,” he replies, right away. That hurts too. You expect him to say something else, but he jumps into the first car.

You wait until he disappears from your sight before you turn and walk all the way to the other end of the train. Once you’re inside, and you’ve found a seat by the window, you take out your phone. You were hoping there would be some kind of text from Hongseok, but there’s one from your roommate instead.

Hongseok called me and said the two of you are out right now and he was going to take you home but something happened ???

You roll your eyes. You really don’t want to get into this right now. But you text your roommate back and say yes, that’s all true.

he asked me to pick you up from the train station, he said you’re arriving at 11 or so, I’ll meet you there

You immediately respond saying that isn’t necessary.

y/n, he said you’ve been drinking…. he’s worried about you getting home by yourself

The second you read that, the tears start to fall. You hate him so much. How could he have no reaction to your confession, but still worry about you like this? It doesn’t make any sense.

You respond and tell your roommate you’ll be there soon.

As the train pulls out of the station, you rest your head on the window and close your eyes. This train ride is so much different than the one this morning. You honestly wish you hadn’t said anything at all. Now you’ve probably lost your best friend forever.

===

Three days go by without hearing anything from Hongseok. At this point, you don’t know what there is to say. You spent a long time wondering if you should be the first to reach out, but you’ve said all you need to. If you’ve ruined your friendship by telling him your feelings, then that’s on you.

You really don’t want to make things any harder for him. You knew he was trying to get on the show, so you really shouldn’t have said anything to begin with. You hope he still makes the right choice for him, regardless of you confessing.

On Saturday afternoon, the doorbell rings. You expect it to be one of your roommates, as they tend to forget their keys often. When you open the door and see Hongseok, you’re stunned.

“Hi y/n,” he says, smiling. Seeing his face makes you want to smile too, but you can’t, considering all you’ve been thinking about these past few days.

“Hi,” you reply. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t say sorry,” he laughs. “You have nothing to be sorry for.”

“Why are you here?”

“I came to say sorry.” You frown. “I was thrown off guard so my reaction may have come off the wrong way, and I’m sorry for that.”

“What do you mean the wrong way?” Now Hongseok looks nervous.

“How did you feel?” He asks you. “When you told me you’d take a different train, why did you say that?”

“You were rejecting me,” you say. “I didn’t want to sit in a train with you for 30 minutes trying not to cry.”

“You cried?” Hongseok looks like he’s about to cry himself, just hearing that. “I’m so sorry y/n.”

“It’s fine,” you tell him, shaking your head.

“I withdrew my application.”

“You did what?” You’re shocked.

“I called the producers and told them I wasn’t interested anymore.”

“I hope this isn’t because of me,” you say.

“Of course it’s because of you.”

Hongseok’s looking at you that way again, the same way he did downtown, right before his interview. Maybe he wasn’t rejecting you after all. You suddenly feel really nervous.

“I did some thinking,” he explains. “I did want to be on the show, but it was obviously for all the wrong reasons.” You smile at that.

“So you changed your mind?” He nods.

“I want to stay here, and be with you.” That makes your heart rate jump.

“For the right reasons?” You ask, jokingly.

“Yeah, I’m sorry I didn’t realize it sooner,” he replies. “y/n, I love you too.”

You practically throw yourself at him, wrapping your arms around his neck. His arms are tight around your waist as he hugs you back.

“What if I had changed my mind?” You ask, pulling away a little bit. His arms are still around you.

“I knew you wouldn’t,” he rolls his eyes. “And I have a surprise for you, so that would’ve won you back.”

“A surprise?” Hongseok smiles, letting go of you. There’s a small paper bag sitting outside your front door, to the side, that you hadn’t noticed before. He grabs it, and pulls out your favourite cold drink.

“Here you are.” You say thanks and take a sip. “I have food as well, I was thinking we could go to the park.”

“The swings?”

“The way your eyes just lit up is the most adorable thing I’ve ever seen.” You roll your eyes at that. “But yes, the swings would be great.”

“Let me grab my things,” you tell him, stepping back into your apartment to get your phone and keys.

“This is going to be such a fun first date,” Hongseok says, as you lock the door.

“Date?” Technically, you knew that’s what this is, but it’s still shocking to hear him say it out loud.

“Yes… If that’s okay.”

“You didn’t bring me a date card though.” Hongseok laughs at that.

“This isn’t Bachelor in Paradise!”

“Well, no, but a card still would have been nice,” you say jokingly. The two of you walk down the hall to the elevator.

“Next time.” You nod in agreement. “Can I offer you a kiss instead?”

“I’m sorry what-” Before you can say anything else, Hongseok takes your hand and plants a kiss on the back of it. “Oh.”

“What did you think I meant, y/n?” He asks, a smirk on his face.

“Don’t worry about it.” The two of you step into the elevator and he pushes the button for the bottom floor.

“As your boyfriend, it’s my duty to worry about you.”

“Boyfriend?” You mean to tease him, but you’re more soft than anything. The word sounds so nice to say.

“Well yeah,” Hongseok says. “You love me, I love you, it only makes sense.”

“You should say that more often,” you tell him, as the elevator stops. He follows you as you step out.

“What?” He asks. “That I love you?” You can’t help but blush.

“Yeah,” you reply, absolutely smitten.

As Hongseok opens the door, and you step out into the warm air, he wraps an arm around your shoulders.

“I won’t let you forget it.”

[hidingoutbackstage]

infodump to be about resident evil handsome <3

Ohhhh my gosh where to start.

Honestly I'm just gonna talk about my favorite characters and why I like them, and also the problems I have with them

It'll be under the cut, for those who don't care lol

Gonna start with Rebecca because she's the fave that I have the most issues with. I really like her character, she's smart, she's strong, she's a good fighter, and she's witty, and for all of those reasons she's fun to watch and play as. My issues with her are that Capcom has absolutely no clue what to do with her. She's a side character in the first game that doesn't get to do much except get told to stay out of the way, in her own game, RE0, she's literally the main character but ends up feeling like a supporting character for Billy's arc, and holy fuck is she nerfed in Vendetta. She has that scene at the school making the antidote in the lab, and has a good scene where she fights off some zombies before hiding and getting rescued. She tells Chris what she knows and they go find Leon before she gets kidnapped and gets to do absolutely nothing else for the rest of the film. She's a damsel in distress, is almost forced to marry the villain because she looks like his fridged wife, and is infected with the virus and rendered immobile until Chris and Leon rescue her. Like that entire scene she's just sitting on the table writhing and moaning makes me so uncomfortable. Capcom made a great character, they just didn't know what to do with her (and apparently STILL DON'T considering she's not even in Welcome to Raccoon City) Also, can she not be older? It's impressive that she graduated from college at 18, it shows her incredible intellect, but that doesn't mean she has to be 18 in the first game, does it? Can she not be more adult-like? Idk

Next is Claire. Claire is great! Claire I have less issues with, considering the franchise has been nicer to her character recently. Obviously the peak of her character was in the RE2 remake, but she had other great moments too, I liked her a lot in the darkside chronicles, but also like Rebecca, it seems like the game doesn't always know how to use her character, or end up sidlining her for the male characters. Example, Code Veronica, she's fine, but she's way too broken up about Steve imo (maybe I just hate him) and once she's reunited with Chris she's kind of a player 2 to him. And in Revelations 2 she's kind of just a catalyst for change in Moira. And holy fuck don't get me started on how nerfed she was in Infinite Darkness. She is TOTALLY the B story to Leon's A story and even has her damsel in distress moment with the acid. I liked the ending of ID and I liked the story but I just wish there'd been more Claire.

Leon is fine, I love his character arc from RE2 to Vendetta and all the bits in between, I just think because he's so popular it gets exhausting lmao like Capcom knows how popular he is so they milk it for all it's worth and with there being so many fans there's obviously going to be a lot that I don't like/don't agree with. That's probably splitting hairs though, I do think he's the best-written and best handled RE character Capcom has by far

Jill Valentine my sweet summer child you deserve so much better. She's never been overly sexualized (if you don't count whatever the fuck was going on in RE5) which like. The bar is on the floor but something about Capcom's treatment of her character always kind of rubbed me the wrong way. The character herself is fantastic, do NOT get me wrong, I just wish Capcom had done things differently like not make her version of the RE1 playthrough "easy" mode or not incapacitated her for days in RE3 making her totally useless (not that I don't mind playing as Carlos, mind you) her popularity is well earned, I wish there was less fanart that sexualized her but whatever, and I love her friendship with Chris, definitely one of my top 3 platonic RE relationships.

Chris needs to stop being in so much RE content or I'm gonna go insane. There rlly was no reason to include him in RE7 other than to connect it more to the other games, but his "not a hero" dlc is pretty alright. Obviously his inclusion in 7 led to his role in 8 and oh my g-d I cannot forgive that ridiculous plot point of not telling Ethan about Miranda impersonating his wife. It's so dumb. His rivalry with Wesker never felt earned, but it was always entertaining to see. His rivalry with Arias was fucking stupid and completely unearned (I know they only had one movie to make it happen but still. I love that movie and hate it all at once) Also RE5 is unforgivable except for giving us Sheva so y'know Chris is a mixed bag for me.

Ada is a great character that gets treated like absolute shit. I love morally grey characters, and Ada is a great example of one, and the fandom almost always ruins her somehow, or Capcom finds ways to use her that I typically just personally don't like (like honestly that Ada clone shit in RE6 is ridiculous and totally unnecessary) She's done fantastically in RE2 remake which I love, and I'm honestly glad Capcom somewhat knew to pull the reigns when it came to the idea to have her in RE8 that was ultimately scrapped (it would've made no sense, it was ridiculous, I would not have liked it) so Ada is also another mixed bag for me. I also wish she had more of a connection to this stuff than (for the most part) Leon. Her mission doesn't always involve him, but she's only ever really there when he is, and it irks me.

Ethan Winters sucks and I don't like him and don't care about him and the whole RE7&8 fandom is wrong for liking them and yes that includes my boyfriend

Sorry about that. He's a fine character, he's a protagonist you wanna root for, especially in 8, but man do he and his story get on my nerves.

Alcina was just fanservice and gamerbait and for that reason I can't bring myself to like her, sorry guys. Same goes for Heisenberg even though he was less fanservice-y and a little more interesting than Alcina

Yeah that's all I got, if you read through all this, I am kissing you on the mouth

[thoughts-on-bangtan]

just some thoughts without pretending to be the truth. i have a feeling like inn 2017-18 there was some weird (but not bad) tension between vmin. like jm was getting to know himself and tae was.. observing? idk. the way they glared at e/o and touched was sometimes too intimate and jm went totally shy. but know smth kinda changed and i wonder what is it now? bois are getting older? and some moments in LGO tae doesn't look at jm i guess. like it's him shy now. AMA live is where he looks past him

Okay before I get into it I’d like to ask three questions, not necessarily directed at the person who sent in this ask but rather more into a general discussion round:

what is the sort of behavioral pattern that a ship needs to fulfill in order for people to think “oh, they might be into each other” and “oh, I think X ship is in love”, that sort of thing? Is it loud, almost over the top behavior taken straight out of the older generation Idol handbook? Is it constant physical contact, constant affection through double-meaning dialogues?

if vmin were to exhibit such behavior, show us lots and lots of affectionate interactions on camera in nearly every piece of content we have, tell each other every chance they get that they love each other when the cameras are rolling, would that make them seem more real, or would that cheapen the ship and only lead people to say “vmin is fan service and there’s no chance they are actually real”?

if we agree on the hypothesis that vmin might by now be in a relationship of a few years, and they are both 25 years old, so grown men at the height of their careers, do you really think they would feel the need to showcase their relationship and legitimate romantic feelings to each other in front of the camera? Would they really want to allow millions of people (some with good attitudes and respect, many though without respect and only hate on their tongues) into their relationship?

These are the sort of things I think about and I’m always curious to know what others think and how things would be like if vmin were to behave like certain others, if those who doubt them would stop, or only see it as more of a reason to doubt.

In any case, to a certain extent I agree with the person who sent in this question, that yes vmin’s on camera behavior has changed, that while in 2017/18 it was more Jimin who was shy, it’s now Tae who appears shy more often. But, I don’t see that as bad or negative or sign of things not going well. At all. Since last year I feel like Tae’s attitude toward being an idol and everything that entails has changed a bit, as did his mentality especially after he went through burn out and generally had a hard time in the first few months of 2020. But that I think had nothing to do with Jimin. I think their relationship, however you’d define it, was fine for most of it, and I think after so many years of knowing each other (it’ll be nine this year) and being close friends and perhaps more, they know each other, inside and out, and know how to act in certain situations and depending on how the other is feeling.

But while there have certainly been instances in 2020 where Tae appeared shy when interacting with Jimin, there have also been moments where he didn’t. Take for instance their interview where they spoke about all their albums. Once they got to Wings and BS&T, Tae spoke about how he remembers Jimin’s charisma and how tempting he came across in it. Or the interview filmed in that little corner at a diner or something where Jimin was supposed to say which moment in Dynamite is his favorite where Tae touched his shoulder and Jimin basically completely blanked for a moment before smiling, giggling, and saying that his favorite part was Tae’s. Or that one interview where they sat next to each other talking about Dynamite and then all of a sudden they were holding hands for almost the rest of the interview. Or Tae cupping Jimin’s hand during a photoshoot which we saw in the behind the scenes glimpses from when they were filming the Baskin’ Robbins ads.

More below the cut since this kind of turned out a little longer than anticipated, I hope you don’t mind, anon:

I think a big deciding factor in how vmin behave with each other and how they come across on camera is where they are, as well as most certainly how they are feeling on that day. Tae said himself that on days where he’s feeling good, going to work and doing what they do is fun and he has no problem with it, yet when he’s not feeling well, it’s hard and he has to push himself more to do things. Besides, there is definitely a distinction between how vmin behave when they know a camera is watching, and when there isn’t one. It even shows in something as silly as, remember MOTS ON:E day 2 at the end of Hobi’s performance of EGO when the members join him? Vmin are dancing with each other, standing facing each other with Jimin doing some kind of almost like “I’m performing magic on you” hand gesture toward Tae BUT the second he realizes the cameras are on him, Jimin straightens up and pretends like that didn’t just happen and no one saw anything. Or their side hug on day 1 and silly dance during day 2 during Dionysus, that, too, was something not visible on the main cam, just a side one which they knew would not be available during the replay, so less people would see it. Or even that famous moment of them holding hands on the airport on Tae’s birthday in 2019 on the way to NYC after going up the stairs. They thought no one could see, so they held hands like it’s the most natural and normal thing for them to do because that’s just how they are.

On the other hand, a performance where I agree with the anon that sent the question is that during BangBangCon in June when they performed Friends. Admin 2 already back then told me how you could see how both of them, but especially Tae, were shy during that performance. Jimin in his March vlive talking about Friends said that Friends is a meaningful song for him and that it will be an emotional moment in and of itself if they one day get to perform it together on stage, and you could truly see that. They both seemed somewhat nervous, shy, and a little unsure in some of their movements, but it also showed a glimpse at their dynamic, how it was Jimin who hugged Tae from the back, who opened his hand to lace their fingers together and hold it, almost like that dynamic of “I’m large but he’s in charge”, you know? Why is that? Because not only must it have been meaningful to them to perform together in such a way, but also Friends is a deeply personal song to them, probably more than any of us truly understand. (song analysis by Admin 1) But, at the same time, Tae has no issue with being brave online, as in to go on Wevserse and proclaim that 95z is love, or like today, go and post seven pictures out of which three were of Jimin (4 if you also take into account the one with the mirrors) or to make Jimin’s birthday the password while playing games with ARMY. Perhaps the difference is that on Weverse, Tae is in total control of the situation, it’s a place where no editor will cut the scene or edit it, but whatever he’ll say and post, that will be exactly how it is. Of course people can misconstrue his words, but that’s something no one has any control over ever, and thus not the point.

The way I see it, sometimes they allow themselves to be silly together, to show each other affection and do more cute things, like Tae going to Jimin’s room in ITS and rolling over him, giggling and just being silly and then sitting next to him and caressing Jimin’s back since he was sick. Or Jimin waking up and limping outside to see where Tae is and ask if he’s all right that morning. But in the grand scheme of things BTS have so little privacy, so few things that are truly just theirs and not something they share with us, so they guard the small things precious to them from prying eyes and treasure it. And that’s the case for their relationship, regardless of how you want to see it, as well. It’s theirs, not ours. We’re just privileged enough to catch glimpses of it sometimes.

Like remember on the day they had their interview at KBS in the summer due to their BBH100 #1 where the TV station even showed their arrival? Remember how Tae and Jimin first shared their hand sanitizer, since Jimin used too much of it, and later on when they walked next to each other, first they looked at each other, like a silent question passing between them of “are we doing this?” and concluded that yes. Which was followed by them holding hands and Jimin even raising their hands together toward the camera with an almost a little challenging looking in his eyes, like he wanted to show that they belong together in such a public manner. Tae looked a little shy in that moment as well, but he agreed to do it anyway, so his shyness doesn’t necessarily have to be connected to Jimin, per se, but more the situation they are in and who’s watching them.

Also, a final thing that always fascinates me is how, when other members don’t show their affection in every piece of content we get, no one questions their love for each other, no one questions if X is real even if those two don’t interact all too much for a while, people still think they’re close and whatnot, as example. And yet when vmin don’t interact in every interview and every other piece of content we get, immediately the questions begin if they are still close, if they are still together, if they’ve had a fight or if they broke up. And if they do show affection, it’s immediately equated to “it’s just bros being bros”.

Ask yourself: is an interview about their new song or album really the right place for “ship” moments? Is every performance the right place for it? And what if on that particular day one or the other or both simply weren’t feeling well? Or what if they simply hugged or whatnot before the performance and thus felt no need for a repeat on stage? They are professionals, they are musicians, and if we do get absolutely adorable moments like Tae taking a piece of confetti out of Jimin’s hair during their duet moment in LGO, that’s a precious gift, and not something we should demand/expect seeing every time. Would those moments still feel as special as they do now if we got the every time?

[kotsuvi]

hq at the outdoor pool [hc]

a/n: i did this instead of posting “a month of sundays” and honestly i’m not even mad about it.

karasuno:

- asahi: definitely wears a speedo. that’s all.

- daichi: wears bright orange boardshorts. slathers on sunscreen before, during, and after being in the pool. literally will make suga throw him the bottle while he’s in the water. like this man does not want to burn. occasionally yells at hinata, kageyama and bokuto for being too loud but then goes and does a  cannonball into a group of kids. 

- suga: totally the type to hang around the shallow end and splash around with the kids. he’d just wade around and get a kick out of them and all of the mom’s would fall for him within the first twenty minutes. probably brings neatly sliced carrots for a snack. wears a hat to avoid burning his scalp. 

- nishinoya: the kid that pretends to drown in hopes of getting the hot lifeguard to give him CPR. the first time it actually worked, but it totally backfired the second time. some rando old man “saved” him instead but noya got right out of there before things escalated. he didn’t go back to the pool for the rest of the summer after that. threw up in the pool once too. they had to drain it and it was closed for a week. 

- tanaka: always screaming. slips on the pool deck and gets yelled at for running. this man will literally dive into the water from anywhere. once he nearly decapitated a kid because he dove in the deep end without looking. he’s about one more annoying shriek away being banned from the place. 

- tsukishima: mans DEFO brings goggles to every pool. definitely. absolutely. hinata thought they were a joke and laughed at him for a solid twenty seconds before tsukki threatened to drown him. he does laps around the perimeter of the pool. purposely splashes water in little kids faces. yells at tadashi for swimming too close.

- tadashi: follow tsukki around the whole time. honestly not a very strong swimmer. literally almost drowned once but he doesn’t like to bring it up. he’s got checkered swim shorts. wears one of those white swim shirts that kinda looks like a wetsuit. kid always has goosebumps too, even if the sun is blazing. like teeth chattering. he does NOT like the water but has serious FOMO so he goes in anyways. 

- hinata: dear god. him and kageyama hold competitions for who can make the biggest splash. they jump in front the diving board, the slide, the side of the deck; anything to try and create some waves. really tried to get asahi to throw him into the air. he thought it would be super sick and create this mega splash but he just ended up looking like a toddler being tossed by a middle-aged man. it was extremely embarrassing. boy probably wears neon boardshorts and has matching flip-flops. 

- kageyama: he almost always wins biggest splash. he also threatens to throw small children off the diving board if they don’t jump fast enough. mans has zero patience with other people, but when it’s his turn he chickens out and then makes some excuse as to why he couldn’t do it. “oh, i got a headache”, “there were too many people in the line, it would’ve taken forever”. he also steals things from the lost and found outside the change rooms; mostly water bottles. 

aobajoshai:

- oikawa: comes extremely prepared. like very. towels and sunscreen and snacks and lots of drinks. only for himself tho; sharing is not caring. he just dips his toes in the water, maybe stands on the steps that lead into the pool, then he gets out and tans for the rest of the time. has boardshorts with flamingos on them. will occasionally splash water on his chest because he thinks it’s ~hot~. it kinda is.

- iwaizumi: he says he doesn’t even like the pool, but this man goes HARD in diving competitions. yanno those little toys that you throw in the deep end and they sink and then you have to go and get them? well yeah, he’s addicted to those. he’s so competitive about it too. made a kid cry once. when he’s not in the water he’s helping tendou fill up bottles to dump on kuroo and oikawa. he says there’s nothing to do at the pool, but he literally is busy the whole time. barks at you to shut up if you comment on the fact. 

- kindaichi: brings a giant green floaty and just drifts around the pool. literally had a nap on it once and burnt his body so bad that he couldn’t sit down for a week without excruciating pain. 

- kyoutani: tries to hold his breath for way longer than humanly possible. passed out once. starts a fight in the change rooms over who gets to use the last shower. threw shampoo in oikawa’s eyes once and temporarily blinded him. pretty sure all the staff is scared of him, and honestly they should be. this man will literally kill you. 

nekoma:

- kuroo: isn’t just acting like the lifeguard, he literally is the lifeguard. kidding, but he wishes he was. literally tests the chlorine levels of the water every time he goes there. him and kenma mostly just hang around the edge and talk. he tells off bokuto and tanaka for nearly beheading kids, but thinks it’s funny. he won’t want to get his hair wet, but tendou will absolutely take every opportunity that he can to dunk that man. 

- kenma: get a feeling that this boy does not like the pool. it’s too loud for him, and the screaming kids (+ tanaka) get on his nerves. he just sits with kuroo and prays that noya will throw up in the water again and then it’ll be drained. he only went because hinata pleaded him to, but the boy ditched him for kags halfway through. 

- yaku: literally spends the whole time bullying lev. told tall boy™ that if he went under the water for too long it would absorb through his ears and his lungs would fill up and he would drown. to everyone else he’s very caring. literally saved a kid from drowning once. stopped a fight between a jackass and a girl that was insecure about her braces. literally soft but not when it comes to lev

- lev: TERRIFIED. thanks to yaku he’s literally scared to go in the water for more than five minutes. mans sits on the edge and dangles his feet over the side. hates when his fingers and toes go all pruny. he likes to go on the pool slide though. constantly slips in the change rooms when showering and confuses the shampoo with soap. 

fukurodani:

-bokuto: this man goes WILD. literally lives at the pool when it’s hot. the king of doing tricks off the diving board. seriously. never ever leaves that board. he’ll push kids over to get to the top first. literally never ever stops shouting. he’s gotten so good at tricks that people will literally pay him to try new things. the lifeguards like to bet on whether or not he’ll make it. ALWAYS has a different pair of boardshorts??? this man has so many clothes for some reason. he also brings a different towel every time. oikawa is jealous but he won’t admit it.

- akaashi: DOES NOT SWIM. can do it but chooses not to. mans would rather just sit in the shade and read a good book. bokuto forces him to film shit and post it all over his socials. the kind of guy that looks mysterious and causes girls to giggle and admire from afar because they think he’s a heartbreaker. 

shiratorizawa:

- ushijima: wears shorts that are way too fucking tight for him. snatches the hot lifeguard away from noya without even knowing it. this man will literally just sit at the bottom of the pool for as long as he can. like takes a huge breath and then sinks to the bottom. he’ll just sit there. like you’ll be swimming and look down and oh! there he is, just sitting criss-cross at the bottom of the fucking swimming pool. tanaka dared hinata to lay beside him, but hinata almost drowned before he even got seated cuz the poor boy couldn’t figure out how to stop floating up to the surface. 

- tendou: he swims with his eyes open like DRILLING into you underwater. tsukki was doing his laps once and tendou was just there like watching. he’s the kinda guy to pull the filters out of the side of the pool and examine what’s inside (literally just bugs and leaves and some plastic cap). drinks the pool water. runs on the deck as well. like sprints. spends most of his time bothering everyone else and freaking out other swimmers. doesn’t shower before getting in the water and doesn’t shower afterwards. probably doesn’t shower period.

- goshiki: always doing tricks. handstands?? you got it. a cartwheel into the water? yep. tried to backflip off of bokuto’s shoulders and got screamed at by the staff? yes yes yes. did a flip off the diving board and bellyflopped so bad that his entire body was red for two weeks? mhm. he always needs an audience though, even if it’s just a few 10 year old kids. his trunks fell down once when he was getting out of the water.

other:

- aone: kids are scared of him. he always looks like he wants to drown somebody, and there was a rumour that he actually did. of course he didn’t. mans doesn’t even really know how to swim. he just paddles around in the shallow end. wishes he was wearing water wings.

- terushima: goes to the pool for the snacks and drinks??? “don’t know, the food just hits different here,” is always his answer. he brings his own speaker and literally starts a disco between the lawn chairs. the staff don’t like him at all, but he buys so much fucking food that literally all their income is from that man. he rarely actually goes in the water. stole someone’s flip-flops once and ended up getting warts.

- atsumu: pulls some random girl up on his shoulders for a chicken fight. went through two phones in three weeks because he takes it in the water with him??? literally like on his phone while swimming. idk, mans just gotta stay updated on the twitter tea. 100% pees in the pool and blames it on kageyama.

- sakusa: does not go to the public pool. ever.

[sunkissedpages]

breaking curfew [part eight] || th x reader

A/N: day idk of quarantine. time is meaningless. 

Summary: When you got the job to be a counselor at the summer camp you’d grown up attending all your life, you expected to see some familiar faces. But you certainly hadn’t counted on having to work alongside the boy who had made it his life’s mission to make your life a living hell every summer. In fact, you thought you’d never have to see Tom Holland again. But he’s is in the cabin right across from yours with campers of his own- smirk, jawline, and all. If you didn’t know any better you might’ve thought that he applied for the position just to spite you, but who were you kidding? What kind of asshole would do something like that?

Warnings: swearing, prescription drugs, alcohol mention, anxiety mention

What I listened to while writing: the breaking curfew playlist by @cinnamon-roll-peter​ + CALM by 5sos

Word Count: 2.4k

Series Masterlist

You’ve only been x-rayed twice in your entire life- not counting regular trips to the dentist- before now. Once when you thought you broke your ankle, (but it was really just sprained) and another time when you had pneumonia. Still, neither of those times had been quite as intense as this. Maybe that was because your mom wasn’t with you like she had been before. Or maybe it was because Tom, the boy who was pretending to be your boyfriend, the one that had just undressed you minutes ago, was standing just a few feet away behind the glass. Or in all honesty, maybe it was because you were hopped up on codeine, but who could say?

The x-ray technician draped the lead apron over you and told you to hold your breath while she ran back to operate the machine. She had you lay in a few different positions and had a nurse help her move your arm gingerly each time to lessen the strain on your end. 

It was a painful process, but they moved as fast as they could so that you were back in your room within a few minutes. 

“How’re you feeling?” Tom asked as he sat back in the plastic chair by your bedside. 

“Kinda dizzy.”

“Yeah, you couldn’t walk five steps without running into a wall, I practically had to carry you back here.”

“Fuck off!”

“Glad the pain meds haven’t completely altered your personality,” he said, shaking his head. 

“I feel a little nauseous too,” you added and rolled your neck uncomfortably.

Tom sat up a little more, eyebrows raised in concern. “Are you going to throw up? Do I need to get someone?”

“It’s probably fine,” you shrugged.

“I don’t know about that...  you took those meds on an empty stomach- and that’s probably why you’re smashed to hell too.”

“It’s fiiine, Tom.” You yawned. “I just wanna nap.”

He chuckled and pulled the sheet that had been gathered around your waist up to your shoulders and laid it gently over them. 

“That seems like a good idea.”

“Okay, good night.”

“Good night, y/n.”

It felt like you blinked and you were being shaken awake again. You groaned and attempted to sit up on your elbows, cursing when you tried to put pressure on your injured arm.

“Easy, easy,” Tom said, helping you lay back down on your back. “Um, the doctor’s here, babe.”

“Babe?” you wondered aloud, still clearly disoriented as fuck. 

“Yeah, love. He’s here to tell you about your arm.”

Tom was pretending to be your boyfriend. Right. That made a lot more sense. Why else would he call you babe? 

The doctor introduced himself to you and Tom and talked briefly about what he was looking for in the x-rays as he set them up in the light display for you both to see. 

“So the bad news is that your arm is broken,” he explained, and you felt your heart sink even though you knew it was coming. “But the good news is that it’s just a minor fracture- barely visible on your radius there. It’ll only take about four to six weeks to heal in a cast, and you’ll be good as new.”

You bit your bottom lip wilted visibly. “Six weeks? The summer will be over by then!”

“It shouldn’t be an issue, unless you’re involved in a super active sport or-”

“We’re camp counselors-” Tom said abruptly, irritation at the edge of his voice.

“Oh, yes well you might run into some complications, but you should still be able to do most everything. Even with a cast.”

“Are you sure?”

“Definitely,” he nodded. “I’ll print out a couple pamphlets and some other literature for you on how to care for your arm and cast and etcetera, and you should be fine.”

“Okay, thank you.”

“I’ll also prescribe you some pain killers. Probably not as strong as the codeine they gave you earlier, but a lighter dosage for a few days before switching to extra-strength ibuprofen might help you get back into the swing of things.”

You just nodded, not really understanding any of the words he was saying. You hoped Tom absorbed more of it than you did because you were honestly checked the fuck out. 

“I’m just going to grab the plaster and gauze for your cast and I’ll be right back. What’s your favorite color?”

“Orange,” you said without a second thought.

Tom waited until the doctor was gone before giving you a confused look. “Why’d you say that?”

You gave him the same look back. “What do you mean?”

“Orange isn’t your favorite color.”

“Says who?”

“Your favorite color’s always been green.”

“H-how’d you know that?”

“You really think I don’t remember you cheating your way onto the green team at mega relay every summer?”

“I would not cheat!” you argued.

“You’re supposed to pick a headband out of the box randomly! I don’t think peeking through your fingers and conveniently grabbing a green one every single time counts as random.”

“Well you don’t have any evidence, so good luck proving that in court.”

Tom held his hands up in surrender. “Damn, who said anything about court?”

“I just like being prepared.”

“But wait, why did you get orange?”

You shook your head absentmindedly and shrugged. “Oh, I don’t know. It’s Theo’s favorite color. I thought she’d like it.” 

“That’s... really sweet.”

“Don’t sound so surprised, Holland. I can be nice sometimes.”

“Didn’t know you had it in you.” 

Before you could say anything snarky back the doctor came back in with a written prescription and everything he needed to set and wrap your arm. You tensed and looked away as he set to work on it, using an alcoholic wipe to sanitize your hand and forearm before wrapping it.  

“You can hold her other hand if you want, Tom,” the doctor said, probably thinking that would reassure you, even though in reality it made you way more anxious. 

You had reached for his hand just a few minutes ago, unprompted. But in your defense, you were very out of it. You were still out of it now, but the thought doing it again was ironically making your hands sweat. You guys didn’t really know each other... like that, and even though it was just pretend it felt weirdly intimate.You wouldn’t blame him if he stayed put where he was.

But to your surprise, Tom didn’t even hesitate before grabbing your hand and interlocking his fingers with yours. His palm was a little clammy too, which was a relief. You didn’t want to be the only one with a sweaty hand and gross him out or something, even if you were the one in agonizing pain. 

You squeezed tight as your arm was moved into position for the cast. It hurt like a bitch and for a hot second the nausea returned and you thought you might pass out. 

“So, how did you guys meet?” the doctor asked casually as he worked. “Tom, if I’m not mistaken you’re English? And y/n you’re not? How did that play out?”

“We met at work,” Tom said without missing a beat. 

You were kind of taken aback by how seriously he was taking his role. It really didn’t matter if he was actually your boyfriend or not, it’s not like he’d get kicked out if they found out he wasn’t. 

“At the summer camp?”

“Yeah, it’s really well-known for its international program. We get a lot of campers from all over.”

“Ah, that makes sense. Are you long distance during the year then?”

You and Tom traded looks with each other. Why did you have to get stuck with the chattiest orthopedic surgeon ever? Your fucking luck.

“We are, yeah.” Tom answered for you both again. “We trade off who visits who. We’ve both been in school so we don’t get to see each other very often, but I’ll take what I can get.”

“Summers must be nice then, no? You get to see each other all the time.”

He forced a chuckle. “You have no idea.”

-

The girls practically tackled you the second you got back to camp, and you were immediately bombarded with a chorus of “can I sign it? can I sign it?” from every single one of them. 

“You can all sign it!” you promised. “After you brush your teeth!”

You had never seen them so excited to get ready for bed ever. They were almost giddy about it. 

Your arm was still pretty sore, and the pills were starting to wear off, but you were glad to finally be back in your cabin. You couldn’t wait to knock the heck out and sleep for as long as possible. 

The ride back from the emergency room had been much more peaceful than the ride there. Zendaya was a little pissed you’d disappeared from the waiting room without a word, she was mostly just glad you were getting to go home and rest. You ate your fries and chicken nuggets in the car, and accidentally ended up dozing off on Tom a few times, only to be jostled awake by bumps in the road. 

And now that the day was winding down you could relax and spend some time with your campers. 

“Me first!” Theo exclaimed, racing up to you with toothpaste still in her mouth. You laughed as she scribbled her name in jagged letters across your arm, putting a smiley face in the O. “We have the same favorite color!”

You didn’t have the heart to tell her so you just laughed and nodded. “Now, go spit your toothpaste out before you choke!”

May was next. She signed her name right where your pinky was, almost as if she was trying to hide it. Amalia wrote her name in cursive just above your elbow, Grace signed her name with a heart at the end right next to Amalia’s, and Eva scrawled hers on top of your hand at the edge of your cast. 

You admired the girls’ masterpiece and showed it off to them. “What do you guys think?”

“It’s cool!” Amalia said, and the other girls added their agreements. “I’ve always wanted a cast!”

“Me too!” Grace chimed in. “Or crutches!” 

“I think it’ll definitely make me stand out,” you said as you sat on the floor and settled against one of the bunks for your girls’ daily Good Night Circle. 

“Maybe it’ll help you get a boyfriend!” Theo piped up, now wearing her big metal retainers.

“Or a girlfriend?” Evangeline pointed out very matter-of-factly.

The others were quick to jump on board. 

“Maybe one of the other counselors will see it and fall in love with you!”

“Do you want a boyfriend or a girlfriend?”

“We could help you!”

“Yeah! My dad says I’m a really good matchmaker!”

“You girls are silly!” you said, sighing in exasperation. “I think it’s time for bed.” 

There was less resistance than usual- maybe they were taking pity on you because you were broken- but there were still the typical whines and protests as you tucked them in. 

“Good night, sleep tight, don’t let the bed bugs bite!” you said in a singsong voice as turned off the lights and climbed into your own bed. 

And you finally.... laid there staring at the ceiling. For hours. Despite being completely drained in every sense of the word, you couldn’t sleep. Your mind was racing and you couldn’t get comfortable with your arm bent at a weird angle. And were you remembering everything that had happened that day wrong- or had Tom actually helped you get undressed? And then get dressed? Had he really held your hand? Twice?

You wiggled your fingers as if the movement would replicate the feeling of his hand in yours, or give you an answer of some kind, but of course there was nothing. Just that same emptiness you felt in the pit of your stomach. 

Realistically, you knew all of those things really had happened, and even if you couldn’t remember the specifics, you remembered the little things. Like the pink tint that highlighted Tom’s cheeks when he edged the straps of your swimsuit down your shoulders, or the rough calluses that had tickled your palms when you held hands with him. They reminded you that it wasn’t all some weird dream... or nightmare, rather. 

You pushed your covers off, suddenly feeling very hot. You sat upright and took a few deep breaths to steady yourself, trying to force all the thoughts from your mind. Thinking about Tom in a positive manner was one of, if not the number one way your brain could betray you. Even barely brushing the subject had you breaking out into a cold sweat. The boy was really living rent free in your mind and not in a good way. 

Everything felt wrong, and not for the first time this summer you wished you could pour yourself a drink. Maybe it wouldn’t help with any of your problems, but it sure would take the edge off. 

Even though it was futile, you flopped back on your bed in the hope that sleep would have mercy on you and finally let you rest. You shut your eyes and tried a few of the meditation methods you’d learned from YouTube to make yourself sleepy, but even then you couldn’t shake the low buzz of anxiety that nudged at the back of your mind.

Fucking Tom Holland. 

If you weren’t going to get any sleep you might as well waste time on your phone. You unlocked it, fought the urge to google ‘can you pass out if you punch yourself hard enough,’ and opened Twitter instead. You didn’t need to show up to breakfast with a black eye and a broken arm tomorrow morning. 

Your eyelids were finally starting to feel heavy and the screen on your phone was getting dimmer and dimmer as you began to drift off when sudden knocking at your window startled you out of your half-asleep state. 

The first thought you had was that someone was trying to break in, but then you remembered that you were at a summer camp and there was literally nothing valuable in the cabin so you let yourself relax a little bit. 

When you squinted a bit, you recognized the figure on the other side of the glass and flicked them off with your casted hand, even though you were fairly sure they couldn’t see you sitting there in the dark. It was confirmed when they knocked again and you had to scramble to push open the window so they wouldn’t wake your campers- at this God-forsaken hour. 

“What the fuck do you want?”

this one was tricky to get figure out but lmk what you think i always appreciate feedback!!

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[malereader-inserts]

broken crown | v.

“You’re inherited some of his traits,” Harry mentions from the armchair, “I mean you like to spew out wisdom at random times or mumble some incoherent words that are definitely not English or Latin, you’ve got his rage, his passion, his wonder and skill.”

Word Count: 1,561

A/n: Truth be told, idk if this make sense but I hope it does

< Previous | Next > 

Remus was alone in the house, after mere hours of the wedding ended, he and Tonks got into an argument, about the child she was carrying. He was alone again, in his home. Tonks decided to stay with her dad and mum whilst she cooled off - Sirius came crashing with them as well, wondering how well his cousin was doing.

Remus creeks the door open to your room, it was spotless and probably the first time he had seen it so clean. Your room felt cold, despite the summer sun shining through the windows, lighting up your Gryffindor banners and such. He looks at your bookshelves, the rows of books you had written neatly on its spine. 

Year One: September - December.

The first one in the row, in the eighteen notebooks of your years. One to six, of course, there were other notebooks stood up with them, when Remus looks he didn’t understand it as it was either advance Latin or runes he could not decipher. When you had moved into his home, you had also brought yourself a chest, Remus didn’t questioned it, but whenever he had come into your room - the chest seemed to be locked.

He’ll admit, there’s time curiosity had gotten the best of him and he’s tried to unlock it. But, it wouldn’t budge. Remus sits on your bed, looking around the room, even with your Gryffindor banners and such, your room was full of pictures. You seem to dedicate a wall for them, many of the pictures were with you and the trio as you grow up, some was with your mother, and others with him. 

Remus felt alone.

“Leave-!”

Harry had screamed at Remus, who had unexpectedly turned up at their hideout, explaining his situation. Remus could not see you in the kitchen with the three, unknown to him that you were sitting on the stairs listening to him. You grit your teeth as you wanted to explode, it hadn’t been a day yet and he was already here.

You scoffed as you hear his story, your father abandoning Tonks because she is with a child - he fears that he had passed down his gene, and yet there was you. You adored Tonks, you found her charming and had a fiery personality, she was a great addition to the family. You hear Remus leaving the kitchen, about to go down the hallway when he stops to hear your voice.

“What am I to you?” 

Remus turns around, sharply, he had hoped that you hadn’t heard his conversation with Harry. But, unfortunately, you did. There were a few things Remus had feared, one the full moon, and secondly, the hatred within your eyes. It wasn’t quite a hatred, perhaps it was offence, disappointment.

“Is that why you ran away from mum and me?” You steamed, refraining yourself from standing up and towering over him, “We could have been a happy family, you could have been-”

You stopped, lip quivering as your hands shook with rage. Those times as a child when you craved for your father was because he was too much of a coward. Your dad was practically a stranger to you at the age of nine, the age when he found the courage to meet you - not through the letters or the pictures.

“I was trying to protect you from me...” 

“NINE YEARS DAD,” You shouted, your best friend cringing how your voice broke with anger, “I never have shown signs of me being a werewolf, so why should this child have them? What are you going to do - be a coward?” 

And that stung, Remus’ shoulders deflated, as if Harry hadn’t convinced him enough to go back to Tonks, you were doing one hell of a job and stabbing whilst at it. 

“Are you going to run away forever? Come back nine years after to greet this child, that poor child doesn’t deserve that!” You exclaimed, “What if this is the end? What if we die and that child doesn’t get to have a dad, a brother? All because you were too afraid to show your face.”

You had roared, standing up as Remus took a step back, he hadn’t known you could produce such wrath and how it was terrifying to be around. Your eyes burned, and not with a fiery passion, it burns dark with a burning hatred of the moment. 

“Go-”

“(Y/n), please-”

“Come back to me when you’re a man,” You seethed, taking a step down the stairs towards him, he steps back again, wanting to keep a distance from you, “Come back to me when I see my father again, until then, I’ll be waiting on the other side.”

Remus looks at you, fury and rage had not dispersed as you threaten to take another step. Knowing not to push you over the edge, he makes a run out of the house, apparenting away. 

“(Y/n)?” Hermione softly says, noticing you had made your father run, “Please calm down...”

You took a deep breath, sitting back down on the stairs. Your hands flying to support your head. She sat down next to you, her hand on your back, rubbing it soothingly as you hold back a sob.

“It’ll be alright, (Y/n),” Hermione soothes, “He’ll turn around and go back to Tonks.”

“I feel like I was too harsh,” You responded, looking at her, defeated, “That was my dad, I shouldn’t have talked to him like that-”

“He’ll understand.”

It had been a few days camping in the home of the Blacks. Kreature had summoned Mundugus Fletcher and that’s when you and the group had devised a plan to get the necklace from Umbridge. It’ll take a month before everyone could set out, so there were many nights and days where you would be sitting around and talk. Anything and everything.

“I never asked,” Hermione spoke out from the piano bench, looking at you who was on the floor, looking up at the ceiling blankly, “(Y/n), what did you get in your OWL’s?”

“Yeah,” Ron hummed in agreement, “You should have gotten good grades since you’re Merlin.”

You raised an eyebrow, “I got an O in DADA, Transfiguration, Charms, Ancient Runes and Potions - which is surprising because I was horrible at potions and Snape hated me. Pretty sure I scrape that grade, then again, if Snape hated me that much he would have graded me lower so I didn’t have to go to his NEWT lessons.”

The group chuckled remembering how you would start getting on Snape’s nerves and always struggled with memorising the ingredients. 

“I got E in Herbology, Care of Magical Creatures, Astronomy. And then A in History of Magic,” You shrugged your shoulders, “In all honesty, average, why?”

Hermione shrugged her shoulders as you sat up, “I was curious, since you’re, you know, you?”

“Merlin was extraordinary in charms, that’s why they call him-”

“Prince of Enchantments,” Hermione nodded, smiling, almost excitedly, “I read that somewhere...”

She blushed as Ron stares lovingly at her, you shared a look with Harry before looking at Hermione with a grin your face.

“That’s correct, Merlin seems to be a peacemaker, but I don’t doubt for a minute that Merlin was poor in offence magic - he was at Arthur’s side for a reason. I just often wonder why me?”

“You’re inherited some of his traits,” Harry mentions from the armchair, “I mean you like to spew out wisdom at random times or mumble some incoherent words that are definitely not English or Latin, you’ve got his rage, his passion, his wonder and skill.”

“His rage?” You tilted your head in questioning.

“Yeah,” Ron draws you attention, “You have two types of anger, your normal state and a state where you have such threatening aura, it seems like the powers of your ancestors are with you, like invisible shadows defend you sort of thing, we call it Merlin rage.”

“Huh,” You mumbled, “I never noticed.”

“You always get caught up that’s why,” Ron continues, “Like what Harry says, you also get caught up that you start speaking words we don’t know what you’re saying.”

“Force of habit,” You shrugged your shoulders, “I guess.”

“You’re powerful,” Hermione murmurs as you looked at her, your shoulders deflated, “You were ahead of everyone in school, it’s a wonder how you got average grades.”

“I was caught up like you said, I got bored with that stuff I wanted to know more about Merlin. His spells, his notes, years worth of his adventures with Arthur and his battles with Morgana. I practised day in and day out of his spells, they are complicated and every day, I get frustrated. That he’s bestowed this purpose on me, his powers on me. I spent more time in Dumbledore’s office trying to harness it, trying to control it. I have managed to do a fraction of it - by my age, Merlin was extraordinary and I am not-”

“Yes, you are,” Harry cuts you off, as you snapped your head towards him, “You are extraordinary, you just don’t see it.”

You sighed, of course, they see you as some extraordinary figure. How can you lead an example when you can barely control what has been gifted - it would be selfish of you if you hadn’t gotten this glorious gift, but you never asked for it.

Tagged

@carefulthatsharassment-sir​​ @lanlanlan020202​ @hanniejji​ @dumbssbtch​ @lea-the-foxe​ @stan-joonies​ @littertortilla

[washymylifeaway]

SunaOsa fanfic recs,,, well writer recs LOL

HI! Can you tell I’m excited? Well I’m very excited! I have been stuck in SunaOsa hell for the longest time and I enjoy it very much down here :D Come join me, you won’t regret it LOL. But seriously, I love SunaOsa and I meant to do fics, but then the sheer number of writers I had compelled me to make a post for them ahahah.... I’m here to finally prove to everyone that I am actually in love with SunaOsa and that I have not been lying to you all LOL (ik no one actually cares, but it’s an important matter to me). LEGGO!

As always, pls check WARNINGS, TAGS, and SUMMARIES for fics before reading and make sure you’re taking care of yourselves (since mental health is key!) Stay healthy loves <3

Each author is DIRECTLY linked to their SunaOsa works LOL. I actually didn’t think about this until now, and I didn’t know it’d work but here we are LOL. Whooooh internet :D Also, ignore that some of these writers have like less than 3 fics for SunaOsa,,,,,, I like their writing, okay? :’))))

I’m gonna preface this with I love all of these writers (if I didn’t, they wouldn’t be here) but I can only come up with so many ways to say I WOULD DIE FOR THIS WRITER and THEY WRITE BEAUTIFULLY so to save you from recursion, preface.

LINK TO MY SUNAOSA ML :D

DeathBelle // one I haven’t recommended and this one also got finished semi-recently, An Inconvenient Espionage by DeathBelle (E) 26.6k // a SPY AU! Where Osamu and Atsumu are separated due to necessity over anything else really, and both absolutely hate their partners :) I love their interactions as the fic progresses and how do you accidentally fck somebody? READ TAGS AND WARNINGS, SMUT!

tookumade // because I really can’t rerecommend the same mf fic for the 2384230 time (and cause this one deserves some love), colours in the dark by tookumade (G) 1.3k // an injury recovery fic :D The focus on the fic is on the recovery and the relationship more than anything, but I just love it so much! This is such a comfort fic, and I love their back and forth banter (but it’ll make you feel really single LOL).

rosegoldwriting // sjdkhjdslhf I CAN’T BELIEVE I HAVEN’T RECOMMENDED THIS ONE ANYWHERE WHAT come on with the rain by rosegoldwriting (T) 6.5k // SOULMATE AUUUU! I love my soulmate AUs and this was no exception :D Also I love singing in the rain (it’s been a while since I’ve seen it, but ik it’s a great movie), and ngl I agreed with Suna,,,, kissing in the rain just feels like it’ll be wet... Regardless, I love the ending and I love this fic too so :) (also ryan gosling cameo LOL)

bastigod // A COLLECTION OF FICS cause I love them and I haven’t recommended this yet :0, i've got you in the end i wish i had you from the start by bastigod (T) 8.2k // this is a collection of 7 one shots for sunaosa week! I loved the prompts for that week, and I loved each and every single fic on this list :D They’re all so freaking good and my favorite chapter was ch 3 hands down ljdfadjsf it’s GREAT :D

pancake_surprise // CAUSE CHOCOLATE and honestly the dove wrappers are say some stupid things sometimes like who’s writing these LMFAO, Melt with You by pancake_surprise (G) 2.8k // Osamu is doing what any sane person does with dove chocolate advice, he follows it. Not that it has any good advice, but I mean ig it worked? Trust the process? Anyway, I agreed with Atsumu in this (LOL) but hey it ended cute and I think that’s all that matters :’)

badreputation // OKAY THERE’S ONLY TWO BUT I LOVE BOTH WHAT YOU GONNA DO? FIGHT ME?????? (pls don’t, I’ll lose) Take a hint by badreputation (T) 5.4k // UGH I LOVE THIS ONE! One of the first SunaOsa fics I read and one I keep rereading! I absolutely agree with the fact that Osamu is a Neanderthal and I love food as a love language (feeding me would make me swoon over you, however, if you WERE flirting with me, I would not know LMFAO).

minie_ai // again, only two but like I said what you gonna do about it >:( And I'll Feed You Again by minie_ai (G) 7.3k // MYTHOLOGY cause Suna is a cute fox who causes problems LOL. Also, I love the setting it’s in (ik random, but I wanted to put it out there :D). And SPAM NUMBER made me laugh (maybe my humor is a little too broken) but idk I just thought it was really funny akjshflkjasd.

miyarinnnn // PLEASE not everyone clowning them,,,, someone smack off the stupid grin I have on from reading it :)))) Call it passive or aggressive by miyarinnnn (T) 10.4k // OMG this fic was so much fun to read!!!! I loved how there was the Osamu + Omi bonding moment and the BONUS AT THE END AOSFJOIAS,,,,, There’s like a slight smut scene, but other than that, Osamu is the sappiest man ever. Yeah, it was really funny and cute and I had a great time reading it :D

sketchedsmiles // honestly, I have no words because I was like no way this would happen, but then the a/n and yea anyway double vision by sketchedsmiles (T) 18.3k // I do wanna know how this worked irl, but that’s beside the point LOL. This is why communication is key, but I mean ig I can’t really blame Suna LMFAO. The situations are just tailored so well to misunderstandings and every time is a near miss :’))))). But also shout out to beer pong king Osamu LOL.

sieges // parallax if you want some hanahaki, the art of keeping up by sieges (T) 12.3k // I actually did watch this movie (though you don’t need to in order to read this LOL) and I was really surprised cause I didn’t think anyone would’ve made a fic based on it! Honestly, I don’t think I would ever be able to agree to help my crush write a love letter to their crush, so props to Suna (lol maybe I’m just lame like that okay?) :’D

sifuhotman // even if you don’t wanna read it, go look at the photo at the very end, Paint by Numbers by sifuhotman (T) 5.3k // jealous Osamu because Suna stares at Atsumu LOL. BUT the discount combee comment make me cackle because I CAN SEE IT AJFKAFFJSA (esp with the picture provided, it’s been burned onto my brain). I like this fic because it has some cute twin moments and I love their relationship! (BUT THE COMBEE AFIOJOD.)

SilverMoonT // I love his cat, atypical confession by SilverMoonT (G) 15.5k // I’ve said this before, but I’m not a big fan of body switching fics. HOWEVER, I am a big fan of this,,, say what you want idc idc it’s a good fic. I love the Suna Akaashi best friend agenda in this, and I fully support it :D

spiritscript // I almost sent you all to angst town ahahah,,, maybe I should LOL,,,, two drinks by spiritscript (T) 4k // I saw the instagram post and then OF COURSE I had to come read the fic itself! And like the panic ordering is hilarious as well as the misunderstandings LOL. It’s a wild ride with a lotta coffee Suna doesn’t like LOL. BUT THE ENDING IS CUTE and no kiss kiss cause consent is important :)

lunarins // YES I LOVE THIS ONE JKASJD you taste like strawberries on a summer evening by lunarins (T) 4.4k // I LOVE THIS ONE! I adore all the character cameos that happen (POOR SHIRABU) and THE ENDING AJHFKSJA. I love the ending. Also the food explanation by the writer was really cute and creative!!! (and I love how Osamu tells us what love taste like JADSJK!)

unrequitedangst // 3 fics but I love them all, working backwards till it rhymes by unrequitedangst (T) 4.2k // I love this fic, like loveeee. The plot is funny (I love pushing in the right direction to figure things out) and the way they plot against Atsumu is hilarious. Like gotta make sure that this makes him angry, yes.

sunablinks // there’s also only 3 fics so you should read all three :D, Cherry Bomb by sunablinks (T) 5.4k // CHECK TAGS AND WARNINGS cause they drink a lotta alcohol! But this fic is just Osamu being a mess and everyone makes some very bad decisions. Also, poor Meian san having to dead with their poor decision making skills LOL.

Surprisingly enough this didn’t take that long...... Like I think this is the fastest I’ve ever made a list,,,, Anyways, revelations aside, I had a lotta fun making this list cause like I’ve been saying, I’m in love with SunaOsa. They also definitely have some of the MOST tooth rotting fics I’ve ever read before (physical pain because of the fluff), so if you’re into that, you don’t have to look too far :)

Also sorry for not being super active in terms of new content, but this might continue through next week cause I’m getting busier :( Hopefully not though!