sometimes its really obvious how much people dont actually believe presentation=/=gender when they see their nonbinary friend go from extremely masculine to relaxing back into femininity once theyre comfortable with their gender and every time they call it detransitioning with zero indication thats what their friend is calling it. i dont know how to tell you this but sometimes you present a certain way for social reasons and not because thats how you actually feel. sometimes you experience dysphoria about your body that is actually related to how people view you and not how you feel about your body. i really dont think its that uncommon for trans people to swing really hard in one direction for the affirmation and then relax back into a different presentation once they are more comfortable in their gender
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sometimes i think about how the people who hate on my takes on here would talk to each other and its always phrased like the twitter fandom drama i see but completely irrational and it makes me giggle
"calling kusuke abusive just because he shot his brother with a lethal weapon, plotted his murder, planned to use their grandparents to assist in hurting/killing him, and tried for years to expose his secret to the entire world against his will and through knowingly hurtful means in order to destroy everything he cared about is so stupid! what a stretch!"
"the saiki k fandom is so damn sensitive. i shoot my brother with massive guns all the time and its not abusive because he just blocks it!" HELPEKSJJSJSKSKKS
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I have no idea on actual color schemes tbh but the browns are easier on my eyes on laptop so here we go
Semi-inspired by a guy I used to go to school with then later had the same job as (my first job) who was the most casual on/off dater to the same girl and it was, at times, like I was the third wheel. I walked in as a customer once while he was working and he made a face at me like he was conflicted and was like "be right back" and walked away from the register and to the back. When he returned he was wearing the same jacket as me and made direct eye contact as he said "Hot Topic?" and yeah, yeah actually. It was.
His sometimes-girlfriend was really cute and super chill with me and she knew that I was like the counter to any other people interested in her sometimes-boyfriend? Like he would actively be close to me at work in a way to rub it into another girl's face (she had a crush on him) and when she pointed out "you don't get that close to me" he put a hand on my shoulder and said "bros before hoes".
I also told him "in school when class first started I was like oh hey he looks kinda nice and pleasant but then you opened your mouth and I lost all interest" and he said "yeah that happens". (that said, we always buddied up or grouped up in that class if it was required.)
Not pictured is the actual sometimes-boyfriend to the girl.
No colors are set (hell, idek about the blue in his eyes) and idk names yet either.
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Okay guys I love fanart so much but idk why it's so common for some artists to just forget to draw Azriel's hand scars? That's an essential part of his character. It's like drawing Lucien without his eye scar.
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while i agree that there are some sexist assholes in this fandom, sometimes people call someone sexist just for preferring a male character over a female character, or for disliking a female character.
not everything is about misogyny, sometimes you just don't vibe with a character. it's okay to dislike a character, as long as you don't specifically hate them because of their gender.
(and before you say it, my favorite characters in tma are gertrude and daisy. but there are also characters i dislike, and some of them happen to be female)
.
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not to get hashtag personal but sometimes it just feels nice shouting it out where people will see it. those past few months have been just so weird for me. mostly because it feels like every two weeks i realize something about myself that i have a not-particularly-healthy approach towards and each realization feels like i'm opening a wound and then picking at it for days on end, which. i try to maintain a "well, now that you've addressed it you can start repairing your relationship with it" attitude towards all of it but most days everything feels raw and sensitive to the touch and it's really, really exhausting watching myself under a microscope for so long. and i'm still not sure what to do about it, but i'll give myself just a bit more time to feel uncomfortable
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I want to be more authentic on my other social media platforms too, where irl people know me.
But I have such an intense fear of being perceived I sit. For 3 hours. On a post before posting it 😭😭 I literally just stare at it and have an anxiety attack lol.
And even then sometimes I end up deleting it.
Even though I only do it for myself and nobody really cares it's still ajajaja hard.
But I want people to see me more than a shallow human lol
And maybe, even if only one person likes my "true" self, then I'd be happy 🥲
But what if they bully me more ahhah I already am not the most well liked 🥲🥲🥲🥲
THOUGHTS GO AWAY lol 😭
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